#they’re both wild stray cats and i love that for them

[alleiwentcrazy]

Eddie Munson finds great joy in collecting strays. That’s obvious.

With people, it’s quite pronounced. He treats the word “freak” like an acclaimed royal title, not some low insult. Eddie loves his freaks – he treats them with care, understanding and unmistakable devotion, always offering some sort of safe haven and an outlet for both their sadness and glee. Everyone who knows Eddie knows that.

It’s a bit less pronounced with other creatures. Although Eddie’s adventures with wild, sometimes even feral (or simply interdimensional) animals still present a sore spot for him, he’s never stopped caring about them and trusting them. Eddie has a whole clowder of half-domesticated cats wandering around the fields behind his trailer at all times, because he can’t seem to accept the fact that it’s impossible to efficiently help each and every one of them just like that. Sometimes their constant presence, walls-scratching and low mewling spawns some unwanted pictures and dreams in Eddie’s head, but he will never admit to that.

What’s even less obvious—even to Eddie himself, it seems—is that his relationship with all kinds of strays is, more or less, a two-way street.

Eddie takes after his strays more than he’s aware of. For example, he’s just a little more sarcastic when he’s back from hanging out with Max. He’s a little more excited about basketball when he picks up Lucas after his practice, even though he considers himself a sports’ sworn enemy. He’s a little more tentative and reflective when he gives El some advice about regrowing her hair, because he’s well-versed with how much of a pain in the ass it can be. And so on, and so forth.

It’s the same with his cats. He takes after them a lot.

Usually, it’s Steve who notices it first. He’s also the one who falls victim to Eddie’s cat-like habits.

*

The first time it happens, they’re “studying” for Eddie’s exams. He’s been forced to retake his senior year once again, but this time he’s doing everything in his power to get through it unscathed. Usually Nancy plays the role of his tutor, but Steve takes over when she can’t make it. He’s more like moral support than anything else, since Eddie studies best when he has someone to talk to, and Steve isn’t too confident about his academic skills to really tutor him, so he’s just happy to help and listen.

But it’s starting to get late, he had a morning shift and he’s finding it hard to fight off the drowsiness, especially because Eddie’s voice is deep, raspy and warm, and it makes him feel like he’s listening to some type of bedtime story.

“...so that’s why, I think, trig kinda sucks. But I’m getting the hang of it, I guess?”

He barely registers the meaning of the sentence. He’s so comfortable sitting under the blanket on Eddie’s bed everything loses importance. Moving his mouth seems to be an impossible task, so Steve just hums. When he cracks one eye open, Eddie’s looking at him with an unreadable expression.

“I’ll make some coffee,” he says, but Steve doesn’t even see him leave. He slides down and buries his face in the pillows.

He knows when Eddie comes back because the smell of coffee infiltrates his sleepy haze, but doesn’t motivate him enough to get up.

“Budge up,” he hears. Then a hand squeezes his shoulder, so he moves closer to the wall with a whine, squishing his cheek further into the pillow. Something warm settles beside him and he thinks, simply, that it’s really pleasant to be this cozy and comfortable before he drifts off for good.

When he opens his eyes in the morning, he’s welcomed by a very curious sight.

Eddie Munson sleeps like a cat.

He’s lying on his back, long hair only slightly tangled where it’s splayed over the pillow. When sunrays hit his face, he instinctively turns his head in the right direction and Steve almost expects him to make a noise—a noise that would most probably remind him of purring. Eddie’s limbs are spread out all over the bed and his whole body seems to be twisted to the side, but he still takes up a lot less space than anticipated. His left hip is pressed to Steve’s right, but it’s the only point of connection between them.

Steve has seen this sleeping position only once, when he met Robin’s cat, Biscuit. Biscuit supposedly hates Robin, but somehow trusts Steve, because he sleeps with his tummy out when Steve’s around. Just like Eddie.

Steve raises his brow and looks at Eddie’s sunlit face again. He’s peaceful and relaxed, unbothered by the noises coming from outside. When the sun moves again, Eddie moves with it, pressing his bony hip a little closer to Steve’s.

That’s curious indeed. Steve doesn’t want to dwell on how it makes him feel at the moment, so he just looks. It’s quite a sight.

*

Weeks pass, Eddie’s peculiar habits get more and more frequent—or maybe after that one night spent at the trailer Steve’s just more focused on taking note of them. His hypothesis that Eddie’s a lot like his animal companions of choice is being confirmed time and time again, mostly when Eddie falls asleep.

After some time, Steve notices that on top of preferring weird sleeping positions, Eddie also makes a habit of seeking other people’s warmth whenever he wants to take a nap. Steve honestly doesn’t think it’s anything personal; Eddie will fall asleep on anyone’s shoulder if they let him, but he seems to have a preference. The preference being Steve.

When Robin tries to comment on that, Steve silences her. Half because he doesn’t want to confront that yet, half because he enjoys it and doesn’t want to spook Eddie away. Sue him if he likes being needed, right?

The only time he kind of regrets letting Eddie cling to him is when they go to the beach with the kids.

It’s not even a real beach, but they’re set on enjoying it as much as they can. Eddie takes his van, Nancy takes the wagon, they pack everyone inside and get the hell out of Hawkins for a full day. The weather is perfect, the grass is green and soft, the lake is nothing like Lover’s Lake at home. If only because there are no horrible memories attached.

Steve’s off babysitting duties when Nancy announces lunch, everyone wolfs down their sandwiches and lounges lazily around the lake in the scorching afternoon sun.

There aren’t many things Steve enjoys more than good sunbathing. At home, he can’t really do that anymore. He can’t stand the pool and the chlorine, he can’t stand the sound of unnatural sloshing of the water. It all makes his head spin and before he knows it, he’s back inside, fully dressed and calling Robin to ease the panic.

It’s different here. He lays down on his fluffy towel and enjoys the sun, listening to Dustin’s happy squeals and Lucas’ joyful giggling.

Until he has to hiss, because glacially cold droplets of water hit his sternum and a shadow obscures the light. When he opens his eyes, Eddie Munson grins at him despite the glare he’s being welcomed with.

“Hiya,” he says, shaking his head like a dog. Steve scowls some more. “Move over, beauty queen.”

“Don’t you have your own towel?” he grumbles, but makes space nonetheless, all while desperately trying not to catch Robin’s eyes at the same time.

Eddie plops down beside him, immediately making himself comfortable in the sparse space Steve has left him. “Yeah, but yours is better. And you wouldn’t starve a man of his rightful summer afternoon nap, would you, Stevie?”

Steve closes his eyes, not letting go of the frown. “Stop yapping or I’ll throw you into the water again.”

“Will you carry me to the shore princess style this time? Because—Hey!” He finally shuts up when Steve elbows him.

When Robin wakes him up again, Eddie’s on his side, so close to Steve he can feel his steady breaths on his shoulder. Eddie’s both arms are thrown over Steve’s chest—because of course, even his side sleeping must be cat-like.

“Wake up, tiger,” she says, barely holding back a smirk. Steve knows this face too well.

“What are you…” Robin points at the sun and then at his chest. Steve’s brain is still a little hazy from his nap, so it takes him a while to understand what she means. When it hits him, his eyes get so big Robin can’t contain herself anymore. She lets out a loud cackle that soon transforms into a full laughing fit. Steve can’t even blame her for it.

Eddie stirs beside him. Slowly, he sits up and yawns. While he’s rubbing his eyes, Steve looks down at his chest in agony. It’s all red and scorched – all, aside from two pale stripes where Eddie’s arms were lying across his skin.

He sighs at it in disbelief while Robin cackles some more.

*

Overall, Steve quickly finds out that he really doesn’t mind the fact that Eddie includes him in his every nap when they’re together. In fact, he learns that he enjoys it so much he can’t imagine napping all by himself at this point.

But it’s all okay. And it’s not that unusual, right? They’ve all gotten really close since Vecna—even Nancy and Robin have some kind of secret proximity contract going on between them, it seems. It’s the magic of shared trauma and shared secrets that keeps them together and pulls them closer to each other every day.

At least that’s how Steve explains it to himself. That’s how he explains the comfort and sense of safety he gets every time Eddie’s back is pressed to his chest, when they’re breathing evenly and in sync. That’s how he sees it when he absent-mindedly reaches for Eddie’s hand when they’re falling asleep on the Munsons’ worn-out sofa. That’s how he feels when Eddie’s arms pull him closer.

Deep down, he knows it’s not usual at all. He’s had enough dates and romances to recognize when things cross the line, but he purposefully closes his eyes to that for the time being, letting himself enjoy the comfort and the safety of it all.

He learns the hard way that while both him and Eddie decide to stay oblivious, not everyone else does. And the fact that they never talk about it doesn’t help.

As per usual, when their monthly movie night with Nancy and Robin – the original Upside Down Bat Squad – comes, Steve and Eddie squeeze themselves into one loveseat. Eddie’s head drops to Steve’s shoulder almost immediately and he folds himself into a small human ball, pressing his side to Steve and going to sleep instantly.

Steve would love to take a nap himself, but the movie is just interesting enough to keep him in the half-dazed lethargy between sleep and consciousness. When he finally drifts off, it’s not for long.

He opens his eyes again when he registers the sudden lack of warmth beside him. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Eddie leave through the glass door in his living room. He wants to call after him, but before he does, he finally notices the muffled talk in the corridor. Nancy’s voice cuts through the silence first.

“...yes, but isn’t it kind of… Strange for them to be like that without acknowledging it in any way?”

It’s quiet for a bit, as if the conversation is being actively processed by both participants. “You mean the, uh… The closeness, or…?” Robin tries to keep her voice steady and neutral, but her cover blows a little bit more with every word.

“Yes! You clearly can’t be this intimate with someone if you don’t care about them deeply. There’s always a reason to be so close to each other, right? And you’re Steve’s platonic soulmate, so it’s definitely not like that between them.”

So many things come to Steve’s mind so suddenly he has to close his eyes—things concerning not only him and Eddie, but also Nancy and Robin. Things they were all too blind to notice.

“You mean, um,” Robin swallows so loudly even Steve can hear it. “To be as close to each other… As we are, sometimes?”

He gets up, then, deciding that he’s heard enough. Robin will tell him everything either way.

When he opens the glass door and catches the sight of Eddie, sitting on one of the lawn chairs and smoking, he realizes that they’re both going to have a lot to confess to each other at work tomorrow.

He sits down on the chair next to Eddie’s and lets the silence envelop them for a second. Eddie passes him the cigarette and he takes a prolonged drag.

“Robin and Nance woke me up with their babbling. Sorry for waking you up too,” Eddie says without looking at him.

Steve doesn’t really know how to approach it. It would be difficult enough if only one or two of them were having a revelation this evening, but since it���s all of them—well, that complicates things. He’s only a little bit surprised that his revelation doesn't hurt him at all, though. It’s not making his stomach churn or his eyes water. He still feels safe within it. When he glances at Eddie again, he can’t help but hope, even though their situation has more layers than either of them has had a chance to discover.

“It’s alright,” he reassures, passing down the cigarette. “I wasn’t really sleeping.”

Something sour flashes on Eddie’s face, but it’s only temporary. He smiles again, then, although his eyes stay dim. “Bet you don’t get good sleep at all when I’m all over you.”

“Actually,” Steve says, making sure to time it perfectly. When he reaches out to take the cigarette from Eddie, he lets their fingers stay pressed together for long enough to make some ash fall to the ground by itself. “It’s the other way around. I like it. I like when we do that.”

Eddie frowns, but his expression is as far from sour as possible. “You do?”

“Yeah. It’s just… It’s calming. I feel safe. Far away from the monsters and shit.”

Eddie smiles and huffs. He lets go of the cigarette gently. His fingers drag down along Steve’s skin. He’s not too willing to admit that, but this simple gesture gives Steve enough goosebumps to last him for life.

“Monsters and shit,” Eddie says, smiling. He turns and presses his knee to Steve’s.

“Yeah, exactly,” Steve presses back. “Monsters and shit.”

[latinokokonoi]

NAMIVIVI’S KIDS AS TEENAGERS!

i used this picrew to make them, thanks to @beanghostprincess 🤍🤍

the first two are namivivi’s biological children. they were conceived from intrauterine insemination, which is a procedure that puts donor sperm directly inside a uterus. they both share the same sperm donor from a bank, who has freckles and the same hair color as nami, so they’re full siblings. vivi is the one who gave birth to both of them and are two years apart. the one with the tangerine hair is older while the blue-haired one is younger. they both wear weather necklaces to show much they love their mama, which is nami’s parental name.

the third child is adopted and was born in alabasta. she was found by nami in a box when she was three days old and moderately malnourished. after they couldn’t find a foster home for her, nami begged and begged vivi to adopt her, and so they did. she’s two years younger than the blue-haired child and is a sweet, shy girl who loves her mommies so much.

the fourth picture is nami and vivi’s second adopted child, who is one year younger than the third. he, also, was found by nami… in a forest when he was two years old. you obviously know how zoro has the worst luck with getting lost? well, nami now has that with finding abandoned children in the wild, but anyway.

he was not malnourished like the third child was, but was extremely dirty due to being abandoned by his parents. the only things he said were, “mama, dada go bye-bye,” and his own name. it broke nami’s heart and decided to take him in, with vivi once again agreeing to adopt. due to trauma, it took him three years later to finally start speaking in full sentences. out of all the kids, he was the wildest and unruliest one. always climbing on the furniture and trees. you name it, he climbs on it. he was having one of those days at eight years old, and it resulted in his left eye falling right out of his orbit. his behavior got better afterwards due to that incident, but he still became a mischievous teenager who loves to pick up stray dogs and cats.

honestly, my brain is too fried to come up with names for them and personalities for the first two 😭😭 but i think i’d like to name the blue-haired child as isabelle. i, once again, want to thank @beanghostprincess for this wonderful idea!!!!

lastly, i used this other picrew to make the kids as a toddlers!!!! i edited some details, if you can notice them.

[happyhealthycats]

Hello! Feel free to ignore this, I just feel kinda hopeless. I have two cats, they’re both strays. I didn’t plan on having pets, but they kinda came in and I couldn’t kick them out in the middle of winter (I also love them a lot). They’re relatively chill for cats (I.e immediately knew how to use the litter box, let us sleep throughout the night, etc.) My issue is that the male cat tends to hog playtime. I have so many toys—all interactive. The female cat tends to be excited about them at the beginning, but once he catches on and starts participating, she completely shuts down and walks away. We have resorted to supervised playtime with sticks, hair ties, and even a small rock that she loves chasing. But he has now started playing with the rock and it’s a never ending cycle of the female cat not getting the exercise and play that I wish she would get. Any suggestions are appreciated! We have tried separating them for playtime, but one of them always goes into the other room or is too distracted to play.

A lot of cats have issues sharing play-time unfortunately. Cats are solitary hunters in the wild, and this can cause a lot of strain between them if they play with each other. In situations like this, I can't encourage single playtime enough. It can be closing one cat in a room for playtime and making sure one cat gets all of the attention and energy spent on hunting. Even better if afterwards they get a high-value treat (this helps trick their brain into thinking it's gone through an entire hunt-kill-eat cycle, which is a good thing!) Then switch places and give the other cat as much time as THEY need playing. You're definitely not alone, though. Cats don't tend to do the whole 'parallel play' thing very well, but you can't blame them! They're sufficient little murder machines and definitely benefit from one-on-one playtime!

[freedomfireflies]

Harry verse time freedomflies ™️ What pets would the different Harry’s get? I feel like 404 Harry and think would have a cat or two. But specifically take in a stray. At least one of them would and then the other just claims the cat as theirs as well eventually. Like Tink takes in the stray and Harry for sure makes fun of her talking about all the diseases she’s going to get but after a while of “visiting” her place he falls in love with the cat. And then they’re both cat parents. Like he would bring cat food, treats, or toys and be like “there was a sale. Said the money would be donated to help wildfire or the wildlife” when in reality he just wanted his little guy to have the best. Tink wouldn’t mind because she knows he secretly loves the cat but she’d tease him here and there. “Wild fires? We live in the city🤨” She seems like she’d also want to teach their cat some tricks so she tries her best and behind her back Harry helps too. He wants the cat to learn the tricks Tink wants so he practices with the cat when she isn’t around or paying attention. While she on the other hand is teaching the cat cough hair balls on Harry’s shoes😭😭 when he finds out he’d teach the cat to claw her clothes. And the cat, well that little dude has the best money can buy, gets treats often from learning odd tricks, and is adored beyond imaginations🥹

Omg I can absolutely see 404rry being a cat dad 😭💞 stop that's SO CUTE!!!! You're so right!! I also love the idea that he's one of those people that just doesn't care about kids or pets and yet they always flock to him, you know?? Like he doesn't give them the time of day and yet they want to be near him all the time (same)

And Tink desperately wants this cat to love her but the cat loves Harry and she's just ???? WHY?? I'M THE ONE WHO FEEDS HIM AND CARES FOR HIM AND CLEANS HIS LITTER BOX, WHY DOES HE LIKE YOU INSTEAD?

And Harry is just sitting there with a cat in his lap, shrugging alsfjsdf

[callsignfangs]

Any basic Farah Headcannons you got?

Also, do you ship her with Alex? (Just curious, no prejudice on ur opinion OP)

Tysmm anon I love getting to rant abt my girl 😚😚

Honestly, I think faralex is pretty cute :] I don’t really go outta my way to ship it bc I feel like Farah deserves more attention just as a character outside of ships, but I def love seeing the cute art and fics of them!! (Daily alex keller is where i get like 99% of my faralex, alex and gazalex fix. We love daily ak in this blog. /lh)

Now for farah hcs 😇

• 100% overprotective of people she loves. She knows better than to actually physically fight someone, but, depending on how bad the situation was, she knows how to absolutely destroy someone socially and never get caught. Like, you pick on one of her brothers/sisters and suddenly the next day everyone thinks you cheated on your husband and egged someones house.

• Def does art. Not necessarily like stylised portraits or anything, just tends to carry around a pen and a scrap of paper on missions and doodle pretty sights or happy moments in her free time.

• Doesn’t actually braid her own hair. She tried to learn in the past, but it never really caught on for her. She usually gets one of her brothers or sisters to do it for her, otherwise just puts it into a quick bun when she needs to.

• Has an absolute bleeding heart for animals. Will totally go out of her way to give food to stray cats and dogs wherever she goes, and if she settles down, the local stray animal population 100% crowds at her door every morning for snacks.

• Probably tried to adopt wild animals as a kid. Gave her parents a heart attack when her little 5 yo self walked in with a baby brown bear staring silently at them.

• Has a lot of scars. Obviously a lot of them are from missions and work, but surprisingly most of them are from stupid childhood stuff. Like, you could leave her alone in a padded room for a whole five seconds and you come back to at least three broken objects, something inedible in her mouth and a massive scrape across both of her arms. She wasn’t a stupid kid, just way too curious for her own good with absolutely no survival instinct.

• The master of gifts. Like, for birthdays and holidays, everyone just eagerly awaits her gifts because she somehow nails exactly what they want, even if they don’t ask her or suggest anything.

• Unintentional queen of gossip. She encourages people to come to her with info because she trusts herself to compile it and store anything important, but 99% of the time she only has drama being told to her. Like, sure, she could tell you the exact details of enemy movements to the centimetre, but she could also tell you about why Fatima broke up with her third boyfriend and how it was definitely his fault.

• Loves customising her appearance in little ways. She’ll have new nail designs and cute little hair bobbles and stuff like that pretty much daily. Def wants to dye her hair or do intricate makeup, but it’s just not practical or safe with her work.

• Hates ladders when they’re stood up by themself. She’s completely fine when they’re leaning on a steady surface, but otherwise put her anywhere above the second step and she’s shaking like a dog on a cat tower.

• Loves sleeping w people platonically. Just enjoys the safety of not being alone and trusts herself to look after the other person while they’re so vulnerable.

• Always doing something with her hands, from fidgeting with her hair, clothes, ect to just constant gestures while talking. Probably knows how to sew, knit, crochet, crack her fingers loud enough to wake the whole base, the lot.

• Is the kinda person who almost never get sick to the point where their immune system is a myth to their friends/family - until they get absolutely knocked out by the most vicious virus you’ve seen (and then bounce back after a few weeks somehow completely fine, like nothing happened).

• Just outright refuses to sleep with a blanket. Will tolerate a quilt, but absolutely refuses blankets. She loves to cuddle up in one while hanging out in the day or just unwinding, but literally can’t sleep at all with one.

• Can’t sit normally for the life of her. Put her on a chair and after maybe five minutes, her legs are each laid over a different end of the chair and she’s hanging from it upside down. /j

• Loves lego sets, just never gets to have them. Imagine that joke of giving guys that lego star wars falcon or sumt ship set and they’ll be completely distracted with it, just turn it up tenfold and add a little more rage.

• Has nightmares over the stupidest stuff. Like, there’s all that trauma nightmare material for her brain to feast on yet she wakes up in a cold sweat over a dream of serial killing cornflakes.

• Can’t massage for shit but is like the base’s personal chiropractor. You complain about your back aching? Five minutes later you’ve been folded perfectly over a table, each one of the joints in your body cracking with a decibel count similar to that of a volcanic eruption and your bones suddenly fresh as the day you were born.

• Holds really good game night kinda things. On an especially long stakeout, she’ll whip out a couple hoarded snacks and a deck of cards and it’s like a family game night all over.

• Surprisingly sentimental. She tries to avoid having too many, if any, personal objects just because she knows she’ll probably have to leave them behind eventually, even if her situation is stable at that moment. She totally has a favourite gun with a name that she treats like her firstborn child, though.

• Has no idea how to comfort people but is somehow absolutely amazing at it. You could be bawling your eyes out, experiencing literally the worst day of your life, whole world crumbling around you, and she’d just sit there in a too-long silence with a hesitant hand on your shoulder, awkwardly mumbling ‘there, there’, and it would inexplicably be the most comforting sensation you’d ever experienced. She just gives off a warm, cosy kinda energy.

• Gleeks on command. Just for funsies.

• Refuses to use any kind of non-manual toothbrushes (electric, sonic, ect). She just hates the feel of them in her mouth.

• Rages pretty easily but refuses to show that in front of her brothers & sisters. Likes to be a kind of role model to them so avoids being overly violent or rude like the plague (generally isn’t either of those without good cause, but esp not with them).

• Overanalyses things for fun. Partly as a bit of a military habit, but she also enjoys deep diving into the things she loves and explores loads of different ideas/meanings to them, and is really passionate about them. It also gives her a kinda fulfilled, safe feeling that honestly my girl deserves more of 😭 /lh

I might add more to this later when my brain kicks back in again 😇

Sorry if this isn’t exactly all hc material, I’m not too great with them, I usually stick to little scenarios and general stuff like that lol. I still enjoyed dumping these little ideas, tysm anon 😚🫂

[grymmnox]

weekly fic recs #27

got a whole 5 fics this week. yeah i haven’t gotten much reading done. also just feel like specifying but whenever i use fusion it means it’s established that the two fandoms exist within the same universe in the first place, while crossover has the dimension hopping n whatnot. (this is just what i use in these lists, and probably isn’t widely recognized but. idk maybe it is.)

fandom(s): bungo stray dogs, my hero academia (a couple crossover fics)

ship(s): soukoku, shin soukoku, kenji/kyouka (idfk what their ship name is), ranpo/yosano (also don’t know theirs), tachigin, and ofc some gen fics

Oneshots

they may see your cracks (but i’ll never let them see you crumble); DeviBlue - bungo stray dogs

not rated | 5.9k words | chuuya/dazai, chuuya & dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

“Despite you are feeling well now, I do have some concerns prompted by Corruption and its lengthy recovery.” He sighed, hiding his smile as both boys stared at him, waiting for him to continue. “When you are so weak, Chuuya-kun, you and Dazai-kun are vulnerable. Even in your own home, an assassination attempt could be made on your lives and the Port Mafia would not know until we found your cold bodies.”

“... Boss?”

Mori continued. “To ensure your safety, I have decided to station guards in your apartment. They will be there all hours of the day every day and work in shifts.”

OR

Mori puts 24-hour guards in Dazai and Chuuya's apartment to monitor them.

That Darn Cat!; BloomingAlyssum - bungo stray dogs

general audiences | 2.4k words | dazai & mori, dazai & hirotsu, dazai & oda, dazai & kunikida, atsushi & dazai, dazai & natsume

summary:

Five times Dazai wants to pet a cat and one time Natsume lets him.

Incomplete

Fate Crumbles Down; FanGirl09 - bungo stray dogs

not rated | 6/? chapters | 24.9k words | there’s so many relationship tags and i am so very tired so here’s the romantic ones, although i’d say they’re definitely not the main focus; chuuya/dazai, akutagawa/atsushi, kenji/kyouka, ranpo/yosano, gin/tachihara | READ TAGS

summary:

What seems to be an intense investigation for the Armed Detective Agency ends up as a survival mission. When a catastrophic magnitude 9.2 earthquake destroys Yokohama mid-case, the group are cut off from each other with no way to know who lives or dies. Emerging from the rubble to their new tilted world, the ADA and Port Mafia struggle to come to terms with the pain and anguish surrounding them--the overwhelming fear that grips their hearts. And on a wild-goose chase for the safety that continues to elude them, they all have one collective goal: to find their way home to each other.

*

If you've read my works before, you know that I like to put focus on side characters as well as the main cast, so if you enjoy that, then you will enjoy this story!

General trigger warning (because I will not be putting one on each individual chapter as these themes will continue through every chapter but the prologue): gruesome injuries, blood, amputations, explosions, fire, severed limbs, death, character deaths, episodes of PTSD, vomit, nightmares, graphic descriptions of earthquake and possible fire victims -- may be more to come as this story continues

The Sticking Point; Anxiety_Pickle - bsd/mha fusion

teen and up | 7/? | 41.5k words | chuuya/dazai, dazai & elise & Q, aizawa & dazai, aizawa & class 1-a, chuuya & kouyou | READ TAGS

summary:

When Nedzu called him to his office for a meeting this morning, with no indication of its subject other than that name, Aizawa knew it was going to be a shitshow, because everything involving Yokohama always was.

"Tell me, how do you feel about transfer students?"

The deal has already been sealed by the time he looks over his tea. For the love of any god that’s listening, he hopes the two transfers aren’t going to be anything like the rest of his class, and knows he’s wrong by the time he steps foot out the door.

(Or: Nedzu and Mori have an understanding, and everyone suffers for it).

Stuck With Babysitter Duty; zaikunxx - bsd/mha crossover

mature | 7/? chapters | 5.1k words | chuuya/dazai | typical dazai warnings

summary:

“We can let you stay in Yuuei.” Nedzu chimes in, paws interlaced with one another as he sat upright on his chair.

Chuuya rolls his eyes, “What's the catch?”

“Nothing big really,” He drifts off, ears twitching. “We'll let you stay in the dorms, and help you find your way back home, only if you help protect class 1-A from villains.”

Dazai sighs, pinching his nose bridge, while Chuuya groans in distaste. “We have no choice though, do we?”

Nedzu smiles. “No, not even one.”

———

Or;

Dazai and Chuuya are teleported into a different universe, and now they need to find a way back home. They're 16 again, just because it helps further the plot.

(Quite literally, actually.)

[winterberryholly]

For the ask game: ♥, sparkly 🌟, 👻

Omg thank you, I forgot I had reblogged this one! Linked here if anyone else wants to ask or be asked :)

❤️: What is your favorite line that you’ve written in a fic?:

I really liked one I had in the most recent chapter of on servitude, and it stuck out to a couple of readers too which made me feel extra special:

Unwilling to outright ask for help (what could he even ask for, when he wouldn’t even cry on her shoulder if she offered it?) Neji waits for her kindness like a starving cat, pleading at the one door he knows will open—and yet, even after all these years, still prepared to be shooed away.

I feel like cats are a good animal for Neji in that cats get really attached but show it in more subtle ways, and with a stray cat (which is an idea I keep coming back to with his relationship with Hiashi) there’s that little element of defense in there too, like “I’m used to going it alone” even if it’s been a long time since they were alone. That all seems very Neji to me. He trusts her, he’ll always look to his team for support, but in the back of his head and especially at his lowest moments, he’s waiting to be rejected like he was by his family as a struggling kid.

✨: Out of the comments you’ve received on your fics, what are two or three of your favorites?

I will start by stating the obvious which is that I love every comment I get! I actually logged in this morning and replied to a couple I hadn’t gotten to while I was looking at these and I fully cried lmao. All of you send the kindest messages. ❤️

I hate to do this because I want to shout people out, but going through my comments I really just love all of them???? I love when people give me their highlight reels but I also love when people are just like HHHHHHNBGHNGG—alright I will just really quickly shout out @we-return-in-waves who sent me one like this for the nejiten succubus fic that had the word “scormitnintitnittngngggggggg” in it and I laughed AGAIN seeing it LOL

👻: What is your wildest headcanon?:

Honestly, overall my headcanons are not that wild and I also don’t feel strongly enough about any of them to not drop them like hot potatoes when a shiny new headcanon comes along 😂 so I’ll just give one that I have been attached to for a good long time and that is that Lee and Neji were each other’s first kiss! It happened spur of the moment during a spar that got a little too intense—Lee started it, inspired by KakaGai’s approach to Rivalry, and Neji didn’t exactly hate it. Bi awakening for the both of them, but they just know they’re better as friends (rivals but lowercase) and don’t take it anywhere. Gaara knows about it and is normal about it; he and Lee are married, it was a long time ago, Neji’s all about Tenten these days. Kankurou weaseled it out of Gaara because he knows how these Konoha rivalries go and he is NOT AT ALL normal about it. like there are veiled threats in Neji’s direction every time they hang out. First person to break up his little brother’s marriage is getting added to the collection. And Tenten doesn’t know. They’d NEVER hear the end of it. Bullied for life. 😂

Thanks so much for the ask! 💕

[insipid-drivel]

Awesome Things My Alters Do For Me On A Regular Basis

It’s time for some DID/OSDD positivity! To any systems, teams, groups, plurals, and so on reading this, I salute you. All of you. Every one of you, even if there are lots sharing the same body. If you’re not out yet or this isn’t a place where you feel comfortable being out, I send you a discrete nod and carry on. My mom is Southern, so she dubs us, “The All Y’all”.

I finally got my diagnosis formally rubber-stamped and registered into my state’s disability care system, and I’ve really felt good about it. Doing some intense work into it, I probably developed DID/OSDD around 6 years old, but I honestly remember noticing tells going on since I was young enough to remember anything at all. It took me about 2 years of focusing on it to learn how to get us all able to communicate and “switch” (change who’s in front) without episodes of amnesia or a sense of loss of control for me.

I didn’t actually know they were alters until a few years ago. I thought I just had a wild imagination and I got to know them by writing novels where they were the main characters. Since I’ve opened my life up to letting my alters (which is the term I prefer to use) help me more directly and frequently, they’ve managed to do the following:

-Alex figured out how to use sleepwalking to sleep-study internal medicine and first aid. He is now capable of making sure I remember to take my meds on time nightly. I require no alarms.

-Cassandra learned how to temporarily block or reduce pain, especially in times of serious crisis. I twisted my ankle while I was alone outside in a storm a few weeks ago and she and Alex teamed up to get me back inside, safe, and dry with a perfectly-wrapped ankle, ice, and crutches.

-Sal does my entire self-care/beauty routine for me, including manicures. By insisting on manicuring my fingers regularly, I no longer have issues with chewing my fingernails when I’m nervous or uncomfortable.

-Marchosias rigged a remote light signal system for my private safe-space to indicate whether I needed help, was sleeping, needed solitude, or felt like talking. I can change the light using an app on my tablet without having to leave my safe space at all.

-Odd is painting my bedroom with acrylic paint flowers, butterflies, and favorite poems of mine to decorate.

-Sal worked with me in the cognitive therapy department so well I got the green-light from my psychiatrist to go off of my antidepressants and have been doing better than when I was taking them.

-Aever figured out how to hack into my peripheral nervous system to shut off the fight-or-flight panic response, stop hot flashes, and built internal safe spaces in my imagination I can go to during a flashback or panic attack.

-Sal is able to talk me through an emotional flare-up when I don’t realize I’ve been triggered by walking me back into what a trigger’s base trauma is in order to halt episodes of spiraling. If it’s a flashback to an abuser, he calls in Cassandra to help.

-Cassandra is able to “get between” me and a flashback and shatter it like glass if it’s bad, especially if it’s a flashback from a time when I was very young.

-Sal and Marchosias (both demonic) rescued me from a bout of lucid dreaming/sleep paralysis; Sal by dragging me out of it and waking me up, and Marchosias by attacking the night terror so it wouldn’t continue to drive panic and trauma when I woke up.

-Alex can eat cheese without giving me an upset stomach because I’m both lactose intolerant and have IBS. None of us know how he did it, but he’s promised to use his command over lactose for good.

-Odd has a near-photographic memory if I misplace something. The caveat is that he gets to call me an idiot if it takes me too long to just ask him if he remembers where the thing I misplaced is.

-For some reason, stray cats love Sal. If he’s walking around outside in front, at least one cat will appear out of the woods yelling for attention. My neighbor and friend wound up adopting Sal’s fanclub and now they’re all vaccinated, healthy, and happy.

-For an equally unknown reason, stray dogs love Alex and react to the same way as the cats love and react to Sal. The two wound up adopting a stray dog and cat that are now co-parenting our 6-month-old puppy and the three are absolutely inseparable. We wound up rehabilitating a badly abused barn cat with PTSD and said kitty is overjoyed with his new forever-home and family.

-The entire group have learned how to type and are capable of writing for me and talking to people over text live and in real time. They love talking and answering questions.

-Marchosias verbally abused and harassed Starz Entertainment over a misleading ad so intensely they wound up taking the ad down after I commented on the number of ways it was exploiting viewers and explained how casinos and ad executives use things like dark patterns and fake countdown timers to encourage addictive behaviors for a profit. Before they did anything, Starz decided to just send wannabe facebook trolls on their payroll to verbally attack me and tell me to kill myself.

-Starz sent 3 different social media experts to personally attack and bully me into shutting up. After 36 hours of middle-aged “social media engineers” ragequitting without bothering to encrypt the very facebook profiles that they attacked me from, Marchosias doxxed all 3 of them and each was forced to start new facebook accounts because they didn’t bother securing their facebook profiles before attacking me and used their actual personal facebook profiles to do it without making any of their photos or information private.

-One asshole woman’s nephew commented, “This is why nobody talks to you at Thanksgiving, Carol.” We laughed for days.

-After all of that effort and my astonished appreciation, I discovered Marchosias fucks like a priapic rabbit during the final hours of Pompeii.

[cassiavioletblue]

Self-Rec Game!

Thank you @chimknj for tagging me in this as it gave me a reason to go back and look through my fics again! 💗

There are currently 74 posted with my name on AO3 O.o

So that’s why it took me a little while to decide on my personal favs. I noticed that most of them have fantasy elements (hybrids, magic etc.) so I guess my love for fantasy is kinda showing in my writing too ;D

Anyways, here are my own top 10‘s!

1. Give me your hand and I'll hold it

LINK

Fandom: Stray kids

Pairing: Bangchan x everyone (not necessarily sexual, btw)

AU: wolf pack

Chan is living together with the other six members of his pack. It’s a calm life - until one day he runs into a fellow wolf named Minho. The other looks scared and Chan tries to help but taking Minho in isn’t as easy as it first seemed – because Minho can’t get away from his past.

My latest fic and one of my first stray kids ones I posted.

I was a little bit nervous because of the fandom switch - so I’m really happy about all the kudos, sweet comments and positive feedback I’ve gotten so far :)

2. Lost and Found

(written with @softjeon, like the following fics)

LINK

Fandom: BTS

Pairing: YoonKook

AU: Hybrids; Pika-hybrid!Jungkook x human!Yoongi

Jungkook as a pika Hybrid is just so cute! If you don’t know what Pikas look or sound like you should totally look them up for an extra serotonin boost :3

I don’t want to spoil too much but after the angst there’s lots of cuteness, so it’s worth it I promise ;)

3. Birds of a feather

LINK

Fandom: BTS

Pairing: YoonKook

AU: Hybrids; Eagle-owl!Yoongi x white-tailed-Kite!Jungkook

Another hybrid one, another yoonkook – and yet this has a completely different vibe!

I loved the whole idea with the mating ceremony and the nest building and it was fun to describe the different feathers and looks!

Yoongi cleaning Kookie’s wings at the lake... *sighs dreamily* I just really enjoyed this universe

4. Home

LINK

Fandom: BTS

Pairing/main characters: Namjoon and Yoongi (platonic)

AU: Hybrids; Arcticfox-hybrid!Yoongi & human!Namjoon

Another hybrid one, this time platonic, with Namjoon stumbling completely unprepared into being a hybrid owner. More exactle, the owner of an arctic-fox-hybrid who’s still half wild and anything but tame. Yoongi cherishes his freedom more than anything… at least in the beginning ;)

5. Caim

LINK

Fandom: BTS

Pairing: NamGi

AU: Magic, Witch!Yoongi x human! Namjoon

Closely followed by „Color me in“ where BTS are all witches and Jungkook has to figure out his magic) but I really like Yoongi as a witch in this one. I think he just fits the magic!Aesthetics so perfectly <3

Namjoon finds Yoongi with a little help from Yoongi’s cat who likes messing with his owner. They’re both interested in each other – but then Namjoon catches Yoongi doing spell work, the spell goes wrong and suddenly Namjoon is marked by a deadly curse!

Not gonna spoil the ending though ;)

6. The perfect Illusion

LINK

Fandom: BTS

Pairings: MinJoon, YoonKook

AU: Geisha/TeahouseAU with Namjoon and Yoongi falling for Geisha!Jimin and Maiko!Jungkook

This one is a classical hurt/comfort one about the fates of two people in a teahouse: Jimin as a Geisha and Jungkook as the Maiko he took under his wings. It’s a colorful, dramatic AU with 81k to enjoy!

Please read the tags first though to make sure you’re aware of the TWs!

7. Drown in me

LINK

Fandom: BTS

Pairings: YoonKook

AU: PirateAU, with Captain!Yoongi and Siren!Jungkook

I simply LOVE seacreatures!

Especially with mermay happening right now, this is a great read for you if you like exciting quests by ship, including pirates and a splash of magic ;)

8. Wolfsbane

LINK

Fandom: BTS

Pairings: YoonKook

AU: WolfpackAU

It was a close call between this and „Everything you’re not“ (another wolfpack-AU, with Jikook as a wolf-and-human-pairing) but „Wolfsbane“ won, because I adore Jungkook as this wild and playful newly turned wolf who rushes head on into lone-wolf-Yoongi’s life. There’s an old feud between Yoongi and the pack that took Jungkook in (the rest of BTS) and …

you’ll have to read it to find out what it was about and what will happen to Yoongi and Jungkook ;)

9. Through the Veil

LINK

Fandom: BTS

Pairings: YoonKook

AU: Demon/UnderworldAU; demon!Yoongi x (spoilers!XD)Jungkook

Number nine is this monster here!

TTV is unbelievable 126 k long and contains Jungkook summoning demon!Yoongi by accident who then pulls him into a world of mythical creatures and gods, where Jungkook has to face the underworld and decide between life and death.

10.And, last but not least, number ten, equally shared by these two „Oldies“

Speed Lane (a MinJoon racer!Au) and Solanacea

(a MinJoon fic which is summarized as „How a gang leader fell for a cute little stripper by accident“. It’s a full on GangAU that’s connected with „Colorblind“,another story in the same universe.)

They are both a little older but that’s exactly why they came to mind.

It was back when iI still put way too much thought into what to name the chapters for each fic, „Speed Line“ even had an extra part where I explained their meaning and all! Nowadays I’m lazy and just use numbers XD

Well, that was a lot! :D

Kudos if you read this all <3

I hope you found something that intigued you and you’ll enjoy what you chose (please tell me if you did <3)

Have fun reading!

C.

P.S. For this game I tag @dreamcatchersdaughter @jkeuphoriadreamland @lizardkingeliot @jeonsdear @today-we-will-survive

[kelinkysama]

I’ll separate my thoughts on the previous post so as not to muddy immediate data perception with my bias ;-;

For the record I half made the charts because I was curious, one of my fav rarepairs is Redtail/Oakheart! I love both characters dearly and it has absolutely butt to do with how they’re portrayed in canon, rather entirely my own stupid headcanons. These cats are woefully misrepresented by the books, though saying that implies there was an original plan...

Whatever I guess I can whine about both :P

Oakheart first. I’m mostly bothered by the lack of anything supplementing his relationships with both Crookedstar and Bluestar in their respective super editions. I might give Crookedstar’s Promise a pass for now since it’s been a while since I’ve read it, but damn, I can’t remember a thing Oakheart actually did in that book aside from squabble with his bro when Crookedstar found out he hooked up with Bluefur.

In my mind I’m just puzzled as to whether Oakheart’s a tom itching for a fight with ThunderClan, or a genuinely goodhearted cat who sees the best even in his enemies. Maybe a reread would clear that up.

Really can’t say the same about Bluestar’s Prophecy. Like... his thing with Bluefur is legitimately framed as a fling. They go on all of one kitty date. And then Bluefur’s pregnant. Yet they’re relationship is framed as something so much more, to the point they become mates again in StarClan. I don’t buy that. I don’t buy that Oakheart would offer to join ThunderClan for Bluefur’s sake, like... maybe the implication is the kits were an accident, but a happy one and now he wants to roll with it? Even if so, relationships built on accidental pregnancies tend to be quite messy and I’m doubtful this one would stand that test of time in consequence. Especially if the two are rarely talking from fear other cats will put pieces together.

Redtail next. Redtail has... multiple personalities, it seems, entirely dependent on the book and who’s writing him. Redtail’s Debt and Leopardstar’s Honor both do him so fucking dirty and it’s heart-wrenching as a... uh... Redtail stan I guess

The former portrays him as an easily manipulated buffoon, one who has good intentions but whose desire to appeal to others gets in the way of them. Granted, throughout the book he betters himself in this regard, but it begs the question of why Bluestar would choose him as her deputy to begin with. When her next two choices are Lionheart and Tigerclaw, two warriors with steadfast beliefs and strong senses of duty... Redtail seems to stray from that picture. ALSO HE FUCKIN’ KILLS OAKHEART WHAT THE HELL

Actually, going to the wiki, I’m immediately met with a quote from Bluestar about Redtail from Into the Wild:

“Redtail was a brave warrior. His loyalty to ThunderClan could never be doubted. I always relied on his judgement, for it bore witness to the needs of the Clan, and was never swayed by self-interest or pride.”

His judgment is constantly fluctuating as needed to satisfy his superiors in this book. It feels in stark contrast to Bluestar’s judge of his character here.

More on that, it bothers me tremendously that the Erins would write a Redtail novella where the focus is on making Tigerclaw a moustache twirling villain (seriously, why did anyone trust this guy), and not on the relationship between Redtail and Bluestar. The original series leaves crumbs pointing to it, but we never get a great sense of it because Redtail dead

Then in Leopardstar’s Honor he’s just.. violent. Provokes Leopardfur into a fight for no damn reason aside from to be a little shit. And GOSH I hate it.

Anyhow like. I still like both these characters. I like how empty the canvases are for who they have to be, I love that I can just project onto them and 99% of the time it doesn’t contradict canon.

I headcanon that Redtail is a bit of an unbearable prick, he’s great at getting shit done but lacks flexibility, gets fussy when cats are late to patrols and stuff like that. He’s tactically smart, but not great at warming up to others (and doesn’t see the point if the task’s getting done anyway). As a mentor, is quite bossy and quick to annoy if his apprentice is struggling to understand his instructions.

Also he probably has autism but idk

Oakheart’s extremely sly, he has an edge on Redtail in that he’s charismatic, popular within his Clan (and probably most other Clans). His people skills aren’t super refined however, and he has a tendency to push too hard when teasing. Like, maybe he picks on Redtail for his small size thinking it all in good fun, but this leads to animosity that eventually boils over and requires honest convo to resolve. Oakheart does genuinely care about people but from Redtail’s perspective, at least at first, this is all just a manipulative tactic to look good and maintain authority.

Sorry at this point while writing my brain got a bit fried. Tl;dr I like this pairing. I don’t have a great reason for it I just think they’re fun and cute and shit

Also I wanna read more fics where Oakheart doesn’t die and becomes leader I think that’d be cool

[displacedcreativity]

There’s obviously a lot of chatter going on about Cruella and 101 Dalmatians and ooohhh my god errebody a lot of you don’t know the source material and I really. I really need to share a nut shelled version of the two novels (yes there’s TWO) because it’s absolutely wild from start to finish and it starts out innocent enough and then just escalates from there.  Copy pasting from my twitter thread cause as much as I love this roller coaster I don’t want to type it again HERE WE GO: To start in the original 101 Dalmatians novel, Mr. and Mrs. Dearly have that house because Mr. Dearly never has to pay taxes ever again and was gifted that house because he wiped out the government debt.  They also had two nannies - Nanny Cook and Nanny Butler. Pongo is still there, but the mother of his pups is a dalmatian named Missis.  Perdita is a dalmatian the family took in out of the rain as a 'wet nurse' to help feed the 15 puppies. Perdita apparently means lost. Cruella is also married to a furrier. Because of course.

  Perdita tells Pongo that she HAD puppies, by a dog named Prince, but her owner sold her puppies so she was out looking for them. After the puppies are stolen, and the Twilight bark reveals the location, Pongo and Missis TRY to tell the humans but fail cause they can't say S's.   Pongo and Missis go on the search for the puppies, and Perdita stays behind to watch the Dearly's. When they get to hell hall, there's 97 puppies and Cadpig is a runt and needs to be pulled along in a toy cart supplied by a 2 year old boy in order to escape. When the dogs get back to London, Cruella's PERSIAN CAT who wants revenge for the kittens Cruella drowned, lets them inside the house so the dogs can destroy Cruella's furs.  They return home and it turns out Perdita's puppies were the one's pulling Cadpig, Prince confirms! Since all the puppies were bought and paid for, and not stolen. No one is looking to get them back. Even Perdita's owner sells her to the Dearly's because fuck Perdita I guess smh. Cruella's cat is now HOMELESS because the destruction of the furs has forced Cruella to flee the country and put Hell Hall up for sale so the Dearly's adopt the cat as well. They then buy Hell Hall for their "Dalmatian Dynasty" with money earned by fixing another gov. debt.  They then adopt Prince because they see how much he still loves Perdita and Prince becomes dalmatian 101. TIME FOR BOOK 2. THE STARLIGHT BARKING. They're still living in Hell Hall and the Persian cats are married.  Cadpig now lives with the Prime Minister. Wholesome, right? Happy and cute what could the sequel to 101 Dalmatians possibly entail that's weirder than the first? MY FRIENDS. FAM. BUCKLE UP. The dogs awaken one morning to find out that not a single living thing aside from dogs can wake up. Doors, machines, etc all work on command and the dogs don't need to eat or drink or sleep.  Cadpig is now the acting PRIME MINISTER AND THE DOGS CAN COMMUNICATE VIA THOUGHT WAVES. They soon discover that they can 'swoosh' which is basically hovering over the ground at high speed. So, I mean, flying. They can basically fly. So Pongo and Missis SWOOSH to London with about 50 other dalmatians to meet with PRIME MINISTER CADPIG. But WAIT. Tommy, the kid from the first book, and the farm crew and the Persian cat from the first book are discovered to ALSO be awake because they were dubbed "honorary dogs" after helping the dalmatians in the first book. Because fuck the Dearly's I guess they're just PETS. The Persian cat thinks this is all Cruella's fault somehow so they pull together a team to go to Cruella's home to KILL HER. But she and her husband are both asleep like everyone else. She's now obsessed with metallic plastic and not furs. So they spare her life.  And then! A mysterious voice comes onto the t.v, alerting all dogs that they must all gather tonight by midnight under starlight. The Twilight bark and the TELEPATHY ensures all dogs get this message. Because of course. *INHALES BECAUSE NEXT PART IS A DOOZY.* All the dogs, including the honorary ones are gathered and waiting. Then! At Midnight! Euphoria! The terror! ....... As Sirius, the Lord of the Dog star appears and announces that he's lonely, and he wants to take all the dogs off Earth so they can avoid the future Nuclear War. But the dogs have to come willingly and in the morning he promises that the world will forget dogs every existed so they're not missed. Pongo is tasked with deciding the fate OF EVERY DOG ON EARTH.  Some stray dogs convince Pongo to say no to Sirius, because the decision to go would be unfair to any dog on Earth who is still hoping to find a loving family on Earth.  So Pongo says no, and Siris proud that the dogs are staying so loyal despite the promise of eternal bliss. Sirius lets all the dogs SWOOSH back home and of course they deduce he appeared everywhere in the world at once because he's a star and not bound by. Physics or something. Pongo gives one last message to Sirius saying dogs may leave one day, but for now they like being on Earth. Also in the second book. Lucky has a wife named Gay and they're secretaries to a poodle.  Patch refuses to marry because he doesn't want to pass down his eye spot.  Roly Poly teaches George, a boxer, how to swim and they bond over magical adventures in Paris. I PROMISE YOU nothing Disney makes with 101 Dalmatians can top the source material and honestly they’re cowards for not doing a perfect adaptation or the second book. (Apparently Disney wanted to do more things based on that author’s work when he was alive  and I’m sure he would have had he not died in 1966 since Starlight Barking came out in 1967. Just think, there’s probably a timeline where Starlight Barking is the first Disney animated sequel instead of Rescuers Down Under.)

[universallychaoticpan]

OMG I LOVE YOUR WRITING SO MUCH! i hope this isn’t too bothering, i don’t know how many requests you get so if it’s too much don’t feel the need to do this! i was hoping you could write a scenario for aot in which the reader is apart of the new levi squad and the 104th cadet corps, set during the time between season 2 & 3 where they were in hiding in that one cabin? the reader is kind and reliable and doesn’t necessarily ask for help, but one day they fall ill with a sickness and everyone is kind of just surprised with how vulnerable and open they become? i was hoping for maybe a platonic/parental relationship between levi and the reader, where he takes care of them while they’re ill and just in general a fluffy kind of angsty story with everyone? i feel like this is so long, sorry!! i just let my imagination run wild and this is probably unorganized, feel free to twist it to fit something better formatted!

Hello there, and thank you so much, both for your sweet words and for requesting!! I am not often swamped with requests though I would love to be, so this is a pleasure to write. :)) Some good ol' comfort for the soul, coming right up; hope you enjoy, and feel free to drop into my inbox any time. <333

Anyone who knew you could say that, despite how much you kept to yourself, you were as reliable as they came. You were trustworthy and ready to prove yourself; no one knew too much about you, but it didn't make them wary. You were kind and easy to like; after a time, even Mikasa found herself taking a liking to you. From that moment on, she became a sort of sister to you. In turn, you were brought into the fold of the cadets, finally becoming a part of something since the day your parents had died. They could all see your strength; how you got up every day without question, wiped the sweat from your brow without complaint, how every bruise and cut you sustained was brushed aside when Krista tried to help you- and then, how it was bandaged and cleaned no later than the next day. You took care of yourself, and the ones around you; it was safe to say that Jean wouldn't soon forget the day you'd gotten him out of a particularly rough spot: an abnormal titan in the trees, stalking him as he tried to keep an eye on it, and a broken sword in his hand. Using him as bait, you'd been able to kill the beat with ease, then helped him back to base.

And now, you found yourself among friends; people you trusted, as Levi's new squad.

The stoic captain himself, following his cousin's footsteps, had taken an odd liking to you after a while as well. Almost like a stray cat, you would slip away from the others and find your quiet places to call your own and then wander back. You followed orders swiftly and well; you got on with others, and they cared for you as much as you did for them. You were someone who he liked to talk to; sometimes sharing tea with you after supper when the others were out. But he could see, perhaps more than the others did, how much you were hiding. Sure, it was obvious to every idiot that you didn't say everything, that you survived and let your sleeping dogs lie. But that was exactly your problem: they didn't lie, and they didn't sleep. He could see it, through the rare flashes of fear in your eyes, when memory came to snap at your heels. He saw it when he would find you awake and silent in the middle of the night, sitting out in the threshold of the door; when you would turn at the sound of his footsteps and hurriedly brush your tears away rush back to your room with a muttered apology. He could see it each and every time a titan approached; how you would tense, your body stiff, before gritting your teeth and leading the charge into battle. Never had he gotten a chance to tell you it was alright; not like he wanted to anyway. Against his better judgement, he found himself wanting to look after you.

And it was a cold day in February when he got his chance. The snow had fallen, thick and heavy, along the ground, keeping you and your friends in constant argument over who's turn it was to fetch the fire wood. more often than not, you would volunteer to help, to grateful sighs of relief that had Levi rolling his eyes. But that particular day, you awoke in the middle of the night, freezing and unable to breathe. Coughing and hacking, you heard Sasha roll over as she woke up not far away, your lungs gratefully taking in air once it was possible. You tossed and turned for hours, fever and nausea setting in before sleep overtook you when the birds outside the windows began to sing. Blinking yourself awake, you almost jumped to see a pair bright copper eyes peering down at you.

"You look like hell," Sasha chirped. "You ok?"

"Not in the least," you groaned. "I can barely move and-"

She was gone in a second, running out the door to your shared room and leaving you to wallow.

"Thanks a lot," you muttered. Still, the quiet was nice; and all you wanted was to lay somewhere quiet....

Which became an impossibility when she returned: this time, with the rest of the former-cadets in tow. Connie promptly took his place at the foot of your bed, while Krista pressed a cool hand against your forehead. As for the rest, they crowded around you in a circle so tight you wouldn't be able to see past them even if you could lift your head.

"You have at least a fever for sure, but I have no idea how bad it could be." The blonde muttered to herself, the others throwing out suggestions as to what it could be. Finally, that came to an end when the captain appeared in the doorway.

"No one is going to die," he sighed, already exasperated beyond belief. "As long as you get out of here and get to work. The hell are you brats in here for anyway?" Parting, your companions allowed the captain to approach your bed; even to him, it was still a shock to see you so...vulnerable.

"Out. Now. I'll stay with them."

Without another word, save for a muttered curse from Jean, which was quickly stifled by a searing glance from the captain, they filed out, leaving you with Levi staring at you. You really did look like hell.

"You just had to go and get sick, didn't you."

"Well I'm not exactly happy about it either, captain."

He stopped, freezing in place completely, before he smiled. "Even sick you're an intolerable little smart ass. Shouldn't you be getting some sleep?"

"Can't," you replied. "No matter how hard I try. Any ideas?"

He sighed, pulling a chair up beside you and lifting the glass of water on your bedside table to your lips. You drank gratefully, the liquid soothing your throat at least a little, while Levi made sure none dripped onto your sheets before he shook his head. "Not like I have much experience with sleep anyway."

"Well don't let me bother you. I'm sure the others are halfway to hell knowing them."

With that you closed your eyes again, and it was silent for a moment. You assumed he'd gone, it was so hushed.

And then he asked; "Why do you do that?"

"Hm?"

"You don't let people care about you. I've noticed it."

"Well you're awfully chatty, captain. What brought this on?"

He ignored your question, fixing his severe eyes on you.

"I'm serious, y/n. You help everyone and yet you're never open to being helped. Even now you tried to get me to go."

You were quiet for a moment before you answered and it betrayed you. "It's not anyone's job to care about me," you shrugged, coughing a little. "I'm alright on my own, but I'm not about to leave someone else out to dry."

You finished, simply looking at the man sitting beside you. But despite himself, or because of the melancholy in your voice when you replied, he found another question bubbling up from inside him; he hated himself for it, but there it was.

"Why are you here?"

There it was; that sadness, that fear, that hit you from time to time. He'd woken it up.

He regretted it as soon as it had been said.

"Im sorry I-"

"It's fine. If I'm going to tell anyone, it may as well be you."

Slowly, he sat, and your eyes got far away. And then, like thawing rivers, it all came falling out:

"My parents died in the fall of Wall Maria; they owned a few businesses in the interior so we shouldn't have been there. But they had gone to meet with some merchant and that's why we were there; they had taken me with them since I was still young enough to need them. Then, when the wall fell, it all went to shit. My father died almost instantly. He was hit in the head with a piece of falling rock. My mother was holding his hand, and he was pulling us through the streets with me holding onto her for dear life and then I remember tripping- I remember tripping over his hand on the ground."

He could see it when you spoke; blood and gore, screaming all around you; the sounds of the world ending as the air grew thick with smoke.

"My mother kept us running," you said softly. "She had my hand so tight in hers I thought it would fall off but it didn't. I didn't stop feeling her hand until the moment she got me onto one of the escape boats. I kept her hand in mine until the moment she made me leave her behind. I never saw her again, even after I made my way back to the interior. There was nothing for me, so I came here.

But I don't think I'll ever forget the look my mother's face in that second. When she told me it was alright to let go and that she would find me. I knew she was lying; so did she. But I let go; and that look, the look of relief and fear, will haunt me forever.

You said it so readily, your expression not happy and not sad. It was simply what you knew, and it made him ache. You had every reason to hate the world; to be cold and detached, to refuse to try to be close to anyone again. But you didn't. You found your place, and you cared, and still, you wouldn't let anyone help you.

"Dammit brat," he chuckled, though there was no joy in the sound. "Leave it to someone like you to get me caring."

"Why the hell would you-"

"Because we're the same. In more ways than you think. I lost everyone I loved, watched my mother die in before me; I lived in the most ruthless places within the walls and I took care of myself. I survived. But unlike you, when I came here, I became who I am now. And you're too good to end up like me."

"I already told you, it's not anyone's job to look after me; least of all yours-"

"And I'm telling you here and now that it's not a job. Everyone in this place has someone watching their back on the field; you're the only one who is missing that when we're off of it." Despite his words, his voice was kind; it shocked you, your weak body warming pleasantly in spite of your apprehension. And when you felt your eyes sting with tears, you felt yourself break open just a bit. Without hesitation, he wiped them away gently, the care he put into the simple gesture tearing you apart.

"It's alright," he murmured. He sat by your side as you cried, quiet with his hand on yours. He sat there while you began to doze off, not moving an inch even when your breaths had evened out and your face had relaxed.

Watching you then, at your most vulnerable, he felt whatever feelings he had for you swell inside him. It wasn't romantic; not at all. But her found himself seeing too much of himself in you already. How you were isolated, even among others. How you gave your all even when it hurt. How even at your weakest, you tried to be strong for someone else's sake. And he wanted to be strong for you in the moments you no longer could; for the first time in a long time, he could feel himself begin to care. And for the first time ever, the budding love he had for you, the one that made him imagine a world where you could be safe, out weighed his fear. For the first time, he understood what people meant when they said they were fighting for a better world for their children. For the families. Saying such things meant being so devoted to someone that you would be ok never waking up again if it meant they would live. And now, he knew that he wanted that world; the one where you no longer had to be strong this way.

He wanted a world where you could be young; he wanted you to have all the things the world had cheated you out of.

A home.

A place.

A family.

And he knew it was possible every time he saw you smile; he saw you youth in you, the joy, the love that you had. He wanted that always;

He wanted to see you live.

[retrievablememories]

love thy neighbor | kun (m)

title: love thy neighbor pairing: kun x black reader genre: fluff, smut, neighbors to lovers request: “Hello again Rain! I hope you're doing well and I'm happy to see you're open for requests again. Your writing in general is a treat to look forward to. An idea for a fic I'd like to suggest is wayv kun/black oc where they're neighbors that secretly pine for another and do feel free get very nsfw lmao. TY!” word count: 5.7k warnings: alcohol use, protected sex, dirty talk, dry humping, riding a/n: i used a prompt from this list of ideas to help me create this fic.

i’m sorry, this fic could’ve theoretically been finished long ago but took me 3893 years because kun intimidates me (and i don’t know why) and that makes it hard to write for him l m f a o chile anyway...

--

Your neighbor might actually kill you one day—but only in the figurative sense.

Kun is too beautiful and kind for your sanity; he’s like one of those men out of a romantic novel who simply should not exist. In other words, the ideal guy. One who helps all the little old ladies in the building take their groceries up to their apartments, one who feeds all the stray cats that hang around the complex, one who helps new tenants move their things in without even being asked.

Your roommate Charlotte would probably be totally smitten over him just like you if she did not already have her own happy relationship with her girlfriend. But since she does, she has decided to spend her time instead teasing you about your crush on him and trying to persuade you into getting tangled up in a matchmaking mess.

“I’m sure he already has a girlfriend, I don’t know, trying to shoot my shot seems ridiculous,” you say to her, worrying the edge of your blanket in your hands. You toss and turn on the couch, flipping onto your stomach and sighing before shuffling onto your back again. “People like that can never stay single for long. Right? They get snapped up quick.”

“You’d know if you simply asked,” Charlotte points out. “Staring holes into his head won’t help you find out more about him.”

“I guess you’re right,” you say, your fingers stumbling over the blanket as it momentarily slips from your hands. Still, the idea of asking him if he’s dating anyone, whether discreetly or more openly, makes you nervous. You’ve talked to Kun several times before, even hung out with him at those friendly get-togethers your apartment building always holds to get the residents mingling, but you’re still anxious around him. It makes you feel silly, like you’re back in high school; but you aren’t quite sure what to do with those emotions or how to form them into something coherent. “Easy to say all that when you already have the person you want, though.”

“Oh, girl. Love is not easy, but that’s why you have to fucking work for it. AKA, go for what—or who—the hell you want and stop pining over him like some lost Juliet on our couch. It’s better than watching you flop around like a dying fish.”

You stand up from the couch abruptly, leaving your blanket to the side and glaring at her. “You don’t get it, ugh.”

“I get it! But you refuse to let me help—”

“Yes, because if I did, you’d say something completely ridiculous and tell him I’m madly in love with him or something.” You head to the bathroom to check yourself in the mirror.

Charlotte throws her hands up in surrender. “Hey, maybe. But that wouldn’t be a lie.”

“Really? I don’t think—”

“I think so. The way you talk about this guy, it’s definitely sounding a little like love to me.”

Once you’re satisfied, you come back in the main room and grab your keys, wanting to end this conversation before Charlotte sets a world record for how many times she can make you feel embarrassed. “Whatever you say. I’m gonna go to the corner store, so...speak now if you need something or forever hold your peace.”

“You can’t run from it,” Charlotte sing-songs, going back to reading her magazine. “And no, I don’t need anything.”

Once you get out your front door, it’s just your luck when you see Kun’s door is also open. You are not dressed for running into him, of all people; your “corner store” clothes being just a T-shirt, leggings, and slides. You freeze in place and momentarily think about unlocking your door and bolting back inside, which you realize is utterly ridiculous. By then, it’s too late; he’s already coming out his door and closing it behind him. 

He perks up when he sees you outside, smiling at you with those deep dimples that make your insides melt. “Hey Y/N, good to see you.”

“Kun! Uh—great to see you too.”

“Are you going out somewhere?” he asks. Inwardly, he feels a bit silly for asking because you clearly are, keys in hand and everything.

“Yeah, just to the store to get a few things.” You wave your hand, and you almost have the urge to lean on your doorframe to appear more calm and collected than you are. Which could potentially end up looking sillier than you intended. “How about you?”

“Going to see a friend,” he answers, and he brushes his hand through his hair in a way that’s completely casual but somehow modelesque at the same time. This is unbelievable, you think to yourself. “We haven’t met up in a while, so…”

“Oh yeah, it’s always nice to go out with old friends,” you say, smiling at the thought of it. Kun nods his agreement, and then has an abrupt, wild idea to ask if you’d like to go out somewhere sometime. Too busy warring with himself over whether he should take the dive, he doesn’t notice you heading towards the stairs already. “I hope you two have a good time!”

“Oh—thanks. Hope you enjoy your trip.” He chuckles, following you down the steps to get to his car. Well, that moment has passed. Sure, he could probably still ask you now if he was bold enough about it, but it feels too awkward to randomly ask someone out in the middle of a stairwell.

You wave bye to him once you both get in the parking lot. He watches you walk to your car with a wistful smile on his face. He wants to say more to you, but the timing isn’t right and it’s best not to hold you up right now. Plus, Hendery’s probably already waiting for him.

It would’ve provided you with a lot of relief if you knew Kun was facing a similar dilemma to you. He’d never had much problem talking to women he liked in the past, but something about you made him feel clumsy and hesitant. But just like with your inability to move forward, there’s no way for you to know his feelings without him saying anything about it—which he has been hesitating over for the longest. 

Maybe he was also still cowering from the embarrassment of the time he’d tried to show you a magic trick that didn’t quite work out, but it was a convenient excuse. At least for him, anyway.

One day he’d get the courage to tell you how he felt, but he didn’t think today was that day.

–

Some strong shots and a few hours at the club was exactly what you needed to unravel your nerves after a long week. You and a few others from your work had decided to go out that Saturday night as a group effort to unwind from dealing with your overbearing boss. “Just a couple shots” eventually turned into more than that, though, but you weren’t complaining. As long as it gave you the opportunity to discard all your issues for a while, you didn’t mind losing yourself a little.

However, your night of fun quickly dissolves into frustration when you realize you’ve lost your keys and have no way to get back into your apartment. You’re not even sure where they might’ve disappeared—in the club, or in the rideshare back to your apartment?

Charlotte is out of the city for the week visiting her long-distance girlfriend, so there’s no way you’re getting back in your apartment tonight. The main office won’t be open at this hour, either; it’s the weekend, and nobody will be there regardless until Monday. And you’re definitely not drunk enough or desperate enough to try to bust the door down.

Though it pains you to do so, you knock on Kun’s door, your head throbbing and dizzy. You feel bad about this. He won’t even be awake at this hour and might not answer, but you don’t know what other options you have. You aren’t familiar enough with your other neighbors to ask this of them. Especially not the old lady living on the other side of you who has a perpetually judgmental aura towards everyone in the apartment building. The only person she seems marginally approving of is none other than the man himself—Qian Kun.

It takes a good minute or two, but you hear the latch unlock, and Kun is suddenly standing in front of you, a look of concern on his sleepy face. He is adorable like this, in his pajamas and his hair mussed and his eyes foggy with sleep. He’s so cute it makes you want to cry—and so you do. 

But your tears are mostly because you’re very tipsy and tired and currently locked out of your very comfortable apartment.

This awakens Kun immediately. “Y/N? What’s wrong?” He gently pulls you into his apartment, his tone quiet but panicked as you put your face in your hands and cry. You just shake your head for a few moments, crying too much to say anything to him. When you don’t reply, he doesn't try to press you for answers; he just puts his arms around you, a bit carefully as if you’re made of some easily breakable material, and lets you wet his T-shirt with your tears.

Finally, when you’ve collected yourself some, you abruptly feel foolish for crying over something like this. He probably thinks someone’s died, and you’ve gotten him all worked up for practically nothing. “I-I’m locked out,” you sigh heavily, and he has enough politeness not to outwardly react to your alcohol breath with your close proximity. “And my roommate is gone…forever.”

His eyebrows lift. “Forever?”

“The whole week, Kun...but it feels like...f-forever.”

“Ah...I see. Is that why you were crying?”

You put your head back in your hands. “Just kill me.”

“Don’t feel bad about it,” Kun says, and there is a tiny lift to his mouth like he wants to smile at your dramatics. “It’s fine. You can stay here tonight.”

“Kun, thank you.” You’re still loosely embracing each other, and you squeeze your arms more tightly around him. Maybe it’s just a reason to rest your head on his chest again and hear his heart beating strong against your cheek, but you wouldn’t admit that. Wait, why is his heart beating so fast? “Thank youuu, I love you so much, this means the world to me.”

Kun’s mind catches on the words I love you so much, and he knows you’re just drunk and need to sleep it off and aren’t really thinking about what you’re saying, but he cannot help lingering there for a moment. He’s glad the front room is still dim from the single lamp he turned on, otherwise you might notice the flush growing on his cheeks. “I...it’s no problem. We should get you comfortable, then.”

As it turns out, get you comfortable means he lets you sleep in his bed while he takes the couch. In another context you’d protest, not wanting to kick him out of his own space, but you are simply too smashed to think about it. You’re seconds away from falling asleep where you stand now that the adrenaline of discovering you’re locked out has worn off. Kun has the idea to make you drink some ice cold water, though, which wakes you up enough to take a proper shower.

By the time you get out of the shower and are wearing his clothes—his clothes—you are feeling a little more sober. You also feel like you’re going to have another small meltdown over all this. “This” being: wearing Kun’s clothes and standing in his bedroom, which is decorated with all his interests and treasured belongings. There’s a small studio setup in one corner, which interests you, but you don’t investigate it any further.

Now you have another little problem, though; what are you gonna do about the pillows? You don’t have anything to cover your hair with, with all your scarves and bonnets in your own apartment. One night of sleeping on a cotton pillow wouldn’t kill you, but that doesn’t make it any less distasteful to think about.

Kun comes into the bedroom to check on you and sees you puzzling around, sitting on the bed and looking awkward. “What’s the matter?”

“Oh. It’s nothing really,” you rush out, unsure if you should tell him about a problem he likely won’t even understand. It must be at least 4:00 a.m. by now, meaning you both desperately need to get some sleep.

“You can tell me, I won’t bite.”

I wouldn’t mind if you did pops into your head, but you immediately try to ignore that thought and are silently grateful that you do not blush visibly.

“Uh, my hair.”

“Your hair?”

“Okay, I need to cover it at night so it won’t get all broken off or anything—sleeping on cotton does wonders for destroying moisture—but I don’t have anything here to use. I mean—it’s...not a huge deal though, I can deal with it for a night?” You’re rambling now. Kun just nods, taking in all this information like he’s listening to something very important and very interesting.

“So then, what would you do to stop that?”

“Wear a scarf, or a bonnet, or using a silk pillowcase works, too. But you probably don’t have any of that stuff, you don’t have to bother with it—”

“Well, let me see.” Kun disappears into his closet and you pause, wondering for a moment if he actually does have a bonnet or something in there. Which would probably be a little hilarious to you.

He comes back out with not a bonnet of a scarf or even a pillowcase, but one of his own shirts. It’s just the right material though, being a pretty purple silk.

“Oh—Kun.” At this point, there are several emotions all trying to come to the forefront, though you have no clue which one to settle on. “Your shirt? You really don’t have to. I could…”

“It’s just a shirt, Y/N. There are a lot more where that comes from...I don’t mind.” He chuckles.

You sigh bashfully but take the shirt from him. “Thank you, it’s really thoughtful of you.” You cover the pillow with his shirt, and it works perfectly.

“Anyway, if you need anything else, just tell me,” he says, lingering by the door.

“I will...thank you,” you say, your voice quiet as you give him a nervous smile. Only when he shuts the door and his footsteps fade away do you allow yourself to bunch the comforter in your fists and scream into it. Everything in here smells just like him, which is probably more than enough to fuel all of your Qian Kun-related daydreams for the next 8 months.

It doesn’t take long for you to drift off when you finally do lie down, and your mind is blissfully empty of anything throughout the night.

--

The next day takes a bit of settling into. You’re momentarily alarmed when you wake up faced with a strange room until you remember last night’s events and recall where you are. There is also the smell of food, good food, which is also sadly unfamiliar to you. Charlotte can’t cook to save either of your lives, so you know you’d never be waking up to the smell of a professional chef-approved breakfast if you were still in your apartment with her.

Walking out of Kun’s room, you see that he’s in the kitchen, halfway finished with cooking breakfast for the both of you. It’s more like brunch at this hour, but what does that matter.

You linger at the doorway for a moment, allowing yourself to imagine that this is what things would be like if you were dating. Getting this view everyday? Life cannot be this unfair.

Maybe not too much, though, since you are standing in his kitchen.

“Oh, good morning,” he greets you, breaking your reverie. “Did you sleep well?”

“Good morning. I slept great. Thanks again for, you know, the shirt, haha…”

He grins, and his dimples come out. “Sure thing. Go ahead and sit! Breakfast will be ready soon.”

It’s the best breakfast you’ve eaten since living with Charlotte; maybe some of the best food you’ve ever had. “I had no idea you could cook this well,” you say. “I mean. I guess I wouldn’t since I haven’t—you know, uh—eaten here before, but—it’s great.” It’s just your luck that your thoughts come out in this fumbling mini-rant, but Kun only laughs good-naturedly.

“Thank you, I’m truly glad you like it.”

You both continue eating breakfast while making light conversation. This just might be the longest conversation you’ve had with each other, and that knowledge seems surreal. You’re almost a little glad you lost your key. Almost.

“So...today is Sunday. And the leasing office still won’t be open until Monday.” Kun says this over the remnants of breakfast. He speaks in a measured tone, like he’s trying to ensure he says the right thing. Whatever that could possibly be. “And you told me your roommate won’t be back until Monday.”

To your credit, you hadn’t exactly accounted for this when you first came over to his place in your distressed state. That means another night spent in his apartment though, which becomes very obvious to you now. “Ah. Sorry, am I imposing?”

“What—no, I-I just wanted to make sure you knew you can stay here tonight, or—however long you need.”

Relief floods through you, and you briefly wonder why you even worried about it; as far as you know, he’s not the kind of person to just kick someone out. “Ohh, of course—that’s good to know. Thank you for all this!”

“You’re welcome.” You miss the smile he gives to your response as you’re busy drinking your juice, but it’s one filled with a certain affection.

--

It feels a bit awkward to just sit around in his apartment all day, with nothing to do and all your belongings still locked out of your reach in your own place, so Kun shows you the studio in the corner of his room. He’d talked about being into music before, but you’d never heard anything of his until now.

When he plays the keyboard for you, it’s to the tune of a beautiful self-composed song. You almost pinch yourself to remind yourself this isn’t a hallucination or a fever dream. A man this appealing really exists, and you’ve stayed the night in his apartment and eaten his breakfast. You give a small round of applause when he finishes.

“Wouldn’t it be cool if you became a famous singer or something? I’d come to all your concerts,” you say lightly, kicking your legs on the edge of his bed.

“All? Really, all?” He laughs.

“Yes, all. A voice and talent like that deserves all the attention.” You lean back on his bed, stretching your legs out. “But all your venues would probably be sold out. Hopefully you’d remember me from your lil’ ole apartment building. I’m sure you’d be living in a penthouse by then.”

Kun smiles bashfully at your compliments, waving his hands as if it’s too much. “Thank you. But I don’t think I could ever forget you.” His voice grows a bit softer. His expression is more genuine than you expect for a conversation that was so playful only seconds ago, and you find it hard to hold eye contact all of a sudden.

It is your turn to be bashful, and you shrug in an effort to seem natural. “Well, I’m flattered.” Despite your unaffected demeanor, you don’t think those words will leave your mind for a good while, even if you wonder about the meaning of them. 

--

Later that evening, Kun makes dinner and you watch TV together, flipping to whatever channels have dramas or movies playing.

You two eventually fall into another conversation when you can’t find anything good to watch—one that does not make you overly nervous for once. During a lull in the talking, that big question pops up into your mind, and you wince internally at how Charlotte would’ve already told you to make a move. You aren't sure how to do that without making him uncomfortable or seeming too sudden, but you decide to make an attempt.

You edge into it with, “So, um, your place looks pretty nice for one guy. It’s just you here, right?”

“Ah yeah, just me. Thanks, I do try my best.”

“Haha, I’m used to my guy friends all having super messy apartments until they get a girlfriend and she teaches them how to clean a stove for the first time…”

“Oh really? That’s a bit sad for them, isn’t it?” He chuckles. “I’m not dating anyone right now, so it’s all me.”

Just the information you were looking for. You try not to show your elation. “Why not?” you blurt out. Then you cringe because this might sound too invasive or even judgmental, but Kun only grins. “It’s just, it’s a little surprising. You’re such a generous person. You seem to care about everyone, even those poor stray kitties that stay outside the apartments all the time.”

He smiles timidly in response to receiving more of your compliments. “I guess it seems curious when you put it like that.” Just like when you’d drunkenly said I love you so much, there’s suddenly heat on the back of his neck that he hopes won’t turn into another blush that’ll expose him. “I don’t really know, I haven’t thought much about it; life’s weird like that.” He isn’t really sure how to answer that question in a way that won’t be too big of a hint that he’s interested in you, though he’s also not entirely sure why he’s still trying to hide it. Wouldn’t now be the perfect opportunity? When will you two have this much time together again? Still, you staying in his apartment for two days doesn’t mean you like him, and maybe he’s jumping the gun.

“That’s true. Guess that’s the same reason why I’ve been alone for a while now.” You shake your head.

“You?” Kun is equally surprised to know this about you.

You laugh incredulously. “Does that shock you or something?”

“I...well.” He rubs the back of his neck as he searches for the words. “I just thought...you’re very pretty, and you’re always really kind when we speak, so...”

“Oh?” Your face heats up at that.

“Yeah, I…think anyone would be lucky to be with you.”

“Oh.” Your body’s first instinct is to freeze with nervousness, but you know Charlotte would be kicking your ass in gear right now if she were somehow here. So, you decide to stop stressing about it and just do it. “Well...wouldn’t it be nice if we both had a way to fix our problems at the same time?”

Kun pauses for a moment before replying. “What do you suggest?” He knows what you are proposing—you can see in his eyes and his slight grin and his posture that he knows—but maybe he wants to hear you say it out loud.

“Hm, well…I don’t know, what do you think?” You lean a bit closer to him, raising your eyebrows and trying your best to look innocent and unassuming. His smile turns into something different with your increased proximity. Something a little more sly.

Mirroring your actions, he inches nearer to you until there’s little space left between. “Well, I think…” Kun tentatively closes the remaining gap between the two of you, the rest of his sentence left to linger as his soft lips envelop yours.

Maybe it’s corny to say it, but it definitely feels like one of those fairytale kisses with the fireworks going off and streamers popping; even though you’re sitting on his couch wearing his pajamas, some movie in the background you’ve long forgotten the plot of, empty dinner plates sitting on the coffee table in front of you.

You aren’t sure how you end up in his lap—who made the first move? Was it his hand on your back or your hands on his shoulders? You straddle him on the couch, your arms slipping around his shoulders and his hands on your back but assuredly traveling farther down your body.

Kun’s hands come to rest on your thighs, pulling the fabric of his shorts up a few inches higher. “I never thought I’d see you wearing my clothes,” he says lowly, grinning against your mouth.

“I also never thought I’d be sitting in your lap like this, but maybe sometimes dreams do come true,” you say jokingly, your lips rubbing against his skin as you slowly kiss his jaw.

You can’t see his expression, but his eyebrows shoot up at that. “Dreams, huh? You think about me often?” His voice pitches lower when he asks this, aroused by the thought of you imagining anything quite so lewd about him. You’ve definitely incriminated yourself now and won’t be able to wiggle out of it without an answer.

“...Maybe.”

“What do you think about me?” Kun grips your hips, which quickly turns into him grabbing your ass—tentatively at first to test the waters, and then firmly enough to grind you against his hardening cock. Sensing him solid and warm underneath you sends a shockwave down your spine, and the sensation heightens when his voice caresses your ear, all low and tense with arousal. “It’s just the two of us here. No one else has to know.”

“I think about your...lips. How you might kiss me. Or what you might say to me. And...your hands.” You pause there, a quiet breath whispering past your lips. “You have really big hands, you know.”

“My hands…” Kun places one on your chest, spreading his fingers across and touching your collarbone. The heel of his palm glides on the top of your breast, and just that touch is enough to get you more worked up. “Hmm. Actually, I’ll admit I’m pretty good with my hands.” He smirks, and he’s possibly the finest thing you’ve ever seen. “What else, Y/N?”

“I thought about how you’d touch me.” His hand slides between your breasts now, down your sternum, and to your stomach. “Maybe I’d invite you into my apartment when Charlotte wasn’t there. We’d watch some stupid movie and pretend to be into it, but we’re really just thinking about each other. You’d eventually end up slipping your hand up my skirt...and making me cum all over your fingers.”

You aren’t sure how you’re saying all this to Kun right now, the dude you have a major crush on, without bursting into flames.

His shaft rubbing against your clit even through your layers of clothes makes you sigh dreamily, pressing your forehead to his and gripping at his shoulders and biceps. His bangs are soft against your forehead, and your breath stutters when he moves to kiss the side of your neck. He has to know how hard your heart is beating right now.

“And then what?” His voice is barely a whisper, then.

“And then you’d fuck me, of course.” There’s a slight laugh in your voice at the ticklish feeling of his lips kissing your skin.

“And then I’d fuck you...hm,” he echoes. “Sure, I can do that.”

The promise of it entices you, and more heat pools between your legs, amplified by the fabric rubbing against your sensitive parts. His hand that’s still on your stomach travels under your shirt then, and your hips falter in your rhythm against him when his fingers brush across your nipple. He brings his lips to your other breast, lapping his tongue against your nipple over the fabric.

You soon come like this, his shaft grinding against your clit and his clothes rubbing against your skin, his hands on your ass and his lips traveling across your breasts. The orgasm is sudden and surprises you, but it’s good, and you convulse as the waves of pleasure course through you. You weaken and slump against him, with him still teasing your breasts with his mouth and hands. Pushing your face into his hair, you moan into the black strands until the quivering stops.

You’re breathless when you speak again. “You haven’t come yet.”

“I’d rather do that when I’m inside you,” he replies. You giggle quietly.

“...What are you waiting for, then?”

“Hold on.” Kun carefully maneuvers you off his lap, and you already want to complain at the lack of his touch. “I have to get a condom.”

“Hurry, or you’ll miss all the fun,” you say as you pull your shirt off with your back to him. You look back over your shoulder at him and grin mischievously.

“You’re such a tease…”

Kun goes into his room to fetch a condom, and when he returns he’s already pulling his shirt off, leaving it on the floor somewhere. You’re fully naked now, your legs pulled up to your chest and your chin resting on your knees as you sit on the couch. Kun’s eyes drop between your legs, your inner thighs still glistening from your previous orgasm, and he swipes his tongue across his lips at the sight of you, wet and ready for him.

Likewise, your eyes drop to the dark trail of hair leading into his pants and his bulge just below it, the way his sweatpants cling to his length, and your pussy throbs with the desire to be filled.

“Please, hurry.”

Kun doesn’t waste any time in getting the rest of his clothes off, shoving his pants and underwear done in one swift move and rolling the condom over his shaft. He climbs onto the couch, grabbing your legs and guiding them around his waist, and you giggle at his eager but gentle touch as you recline on the couch pillows behind you.

He grabs his dick and lines it up with you, then pushes it in slowly at first. The stretch makes your toes curl, but it is a good kind of stretch, the kind that fills you to the brim. Like the missing element you needed.

“Are you okay?” he asks, his voice husky from the pleasure.

“Fuck, please,” is your answer as you shift your hips and try to get him all the way inside quicker. Noticing your urgency, he slides the rest of the way in until your hips are flush against each other and starts thrusting into you. His length dragging across your walls feels much better than you could’ve imagined on any given night, and you clasp your legs tighter around him to get ever closer.

After a point, he pushes your legs up with his hands behind your knees so he can get a deeper angle, and you both moan at the difference in sensation and how much tighter you get around him.

There is no ignoring the messy wet noises of your bodies colliding due to the slickness of your previous orgasm and the new wetness he’s continually fucking out of you. Each thrust reaches deep inside you, deep enough to make you nearly sob, your hands fumbling over your breasts and your clit all the while.

“Kun, god yes please,” you whimper, rocking your hips into the rhythm of his own. You fucking him back makes him groan deeply, his bangs hanging off his forehead as he dips his head to watch himself slide in and out of you. You could not control the urge or the motion of your body even if you wanted to; you want all of him, as close as he can get.

“I don’t want this to end,” he moans, and he pulls out without a warning. You gasp at the sudden emptiness, and your discontent comes out in a full whine. You’d be more embarrassed about it if you weren’t currently consumed with desire, but you presently do not care.

Kun sits back on the couch and pulls you on top of him again. “Ride me,” he says. So you grasp the base of his cock, him grunting as you do, and you press the tip against your entrance before pushing it in. He watches himself slip inside of you while fully enraptured, one hand tight on your hip.

Once you are full with him again, you experimentally grind against him to see how it’ll feel in this new position, and your arms tremble as his pelvis stimulates your clit.

“Go ahead,” he whispers, grasping the nape of your neck and kissing you hard once more, “fuck yourself on me.”

So you keep grinding your clit on him like that, your limbs shaking from the stimulation and your walls fluttering around his cock. You can barely catch a complete breath from him kissing you hard enough to make your lips swell, and your head is so fogged with lust that all you can concentrate on is getting yourself off just like he told you to do.

“Kun…” You roll your head onto his shoulder, pressing your forehead into his skin, your body tiring as you get closer to reaching that high. You’re so close to coming, but you’re not sure if you have enough strength left to get there on your own. Kun notices the state you’re in and grasps your hips to pull them into his, effortlessly sliding himself into you while making sure your clit gets stimulated at the same time.

The new friction of his dick rubbing against your g-spot in this position is enough to have you finally coming and crying out against his neck.

You continue babbling nonsense against his neck as he keeps fucking you, searching for his own end. His hands are hot on your body as he moves you up and down his length.

His climax comes soon after yours, his dick pulsing and his pace slowing. Your back arches at the sensation of him throbbing inside you and releasing his cum into the condom. The way he groans in your ear has your stomach clenching.

For a few minutes after, you both sit quietly and do nothing but cling to one another as you come down from the pleasure.

“So, does this mean we’re together now…?” Kun asks hopefully, running his hands over your back as you lie against him.

You smile against his skin. “Obviously. But if you still want to convince me, we can go a couple more rounds…”

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

The last thing we need is for Y/N to go feral- XD Anyway, can I ask for some headcanons where Malleus, Rook, Vil, Silver, and Trey have to take care of their fem s/o after she turns into an actual cat please (lab accident, or spell gone wrong)? Thank you!

You can read S/O goes feral/acts like a wild animal headcanons here!

Curiouser and Curiouser...

... Honestly, with how powerful of a magician Malleus is, he could restore you to your usual human form right away The only reason he doesn’t is because you tell him you want to see what life is like as a cat. Your wish surprises him, but he respects your desire and allows you to do as you please until you are ready to return. That whimsy of yours never ceases to amuse him.

Night time strolls are a staple! You faithfully follow Malleus as he traverses the camps in the evenings, sometimes scampering ahead to lead the way through the darkness. Your eager attitude never fails to draw a chuckle from him as he allows his partner to guide him, just as much as he guides you.

Malleus likes to keep you resting in his lap during meetings (well, the ones they remember to invite him to). Because of his overwhelming aura, he has scared off a few mob students that walked in and saw him menacingly stroking a cat in his lap while listening in on a briefing. Malleus unintentionally gives off the vibes of a James Bond villain--

For your food, Malleus personally roasts your meat for you in his magical green flames. It’s a little act of love meant to add a bit of flare and pizzazz to your meals!

There’s a game you like playing together, similar to how you’d play with a cat and a laser pointer pen back home. In a dimly lit location, Malleus will summon his little green fairy lights, and it’s your job to try and catch them all as fast as you can!

Rook decides to let you run loose!! Night Raven College is your new hunting grounds—and your playground—to enjoy! He’ll follow you close behind, just to keep a watchful eye as you explore in your new body.

You bet he brings his camera with him to tail you. Rook can’t miss out on this rare opportunity to catch come pictures of you chasing butterflies and pawing at his pant leg to get his attention. Moments like these need to be captured on film so you can one day look back on this time and reminisce!

Oh, Rook adores how your fur tousles and fluffs up when you run about! He loves ruffling your fur up himself just as much, and makes sure to get in a good head pat, kiss, or tickle in whenever he can~

This man is savage. He straight up harpoons fish or shoots wild field mice and, on one knee, offers them to you as fresh food or “tokens of his undying affection”.

No one messes with you while you’re out exploring (mostly because Rook sneaks up behind them with a murderous smile to prevent them from raining on your parade). It’s a taste of freedom you haven’t had in a while, and you get to enjoy every second of it thanks to your guardian huntsman watching you from both near and afar.

Vil’s determined to safeguard you and not let you out of his sight until you return to normal. In fact, he picks out a hand bag that’s just the right size for you to fit in, and brings you with him to class and to his various acting and modeling gigs!

Nothing but the best for you, no matter what your form. Vil ensures that the production assistants on set fetch you healthy but nutritious and high quality meals, and crisp, clean water to drink.

He prepares a special litter box for you that is styled like a canopy bed with curtains. Vil thinks it is unseemly to “use the facilities” so openly, so he specifically chose a design that comes with opaque curtains. That way, you can step in and use the litter box discreetly.

He pampers you from head to claw! Just because you’re a cat doesn’t mean his darling shouldn’t look their best. Vil will wash you, dry you off, brush your fur, and file your nails to perfection. You’ll look like you just came off the cat walk when he’s done with you!

After a long, hard day, Vil embraces you and mutters his grievances into your fur. He finds comfort in your soft, small form, finding that you’re so much more well-mannered and behaved than Leona “brutish wild cats”.

Silver likes keeping you close to him at all times--specifically, close to his chest. He likes the feeling of having something small, fuzzy, and warm near and dear to his heart... but he has to be careful when he’s holding you, because he tends to fall asleep when he gets that comfortable!

He doesn’t trust anything that Lilia whips up for you. Silver marches straight off to the Mystery Shop to purchase some premium canned tuna for you because he knows it’s safe from being tainted by his dad.

He makes sure you get your exercise in by playing with you! That could mean joining him for a jog, or batting a teaser as Silver swings it around. Sometimes you get so into it that you completely miss the toy and pounce on him instead, and you both end up tumbling into the grass, laughing.

Not all days are high energy, though. Silver has times when he just wants to be lazy and relax with you. He’ll scout out a shaded area underneath a tree with a perfect sun spot not too far off for you--and there you’ll be parked for the rest of the afternoon, soaking up the mild weather.

Silver loves soft and fluffy things, so he’s always patting or squishing you in some way or another. He especially likes to nuzzle his face against yours and squeeze your little jelly bean paws... It’s so therapeutic!

First thing’s first, Trey’s clearing the kitchen and the immediate vicinity of foods that cats can’t eat. That means grapes, chocolates, onions, garlic... He doesn’t want you getting sick or hurt!

Trey’s not as good at cooking as he is at baking—but he knows enough to throw together some raw fish and spices to make a special tuna tartare (garnished with a basil leaf). He uses his handy-dandy food processor for the job while you sit at his side, waiting for the tuna to finish churning. It’s adorable watching your ears and nose twitch in anticipation!

After you’re done eating, Trey helps you brush and floss your teeth. He’s not exactly sure if cats need to take care of their dental hygiene to the same extent as humans, but it’s better safe than sorry!

When you’re indoors, Trey follows you around with a lint roller or a vacuum cleaner to clean up any stray cat hairs. He also keeps you away from curtains and furniture--anything that could be damaged by your claws! Riddle would throw a fit if you damaged anything!

Trey fusses over you as his dorm members attempt to get a head pat, cuddle, or a selfie in with your cute kitty self! He claims it’s because they’re causing you trouble, and while that’s true, he’s not being entirely truthful, either. He’s actually a little jealous that he has to share you, too!

[vickyvalentine]

WHAT PETS YOU BOTH WOULD GET

pairings : diluc, childe, kaeya , kazuha, xiao + zhongli (seperate) x gn!reader (pronouns not mentioned)

warnings : not proofread

notes : yes, i’ve finally gotten back to writing after my deleted account . ps this thing is 85% about dogs, im a dog person

DILUC : he probably wouldn’t want one at first, it might mess up the vineyards or scare all of the staff but after some convincing and pleading - you both agree on adopting a german shepherd. they’re loyal, protective and can be aggressive when needed - perfect for you when he’s away and not there to protect you. he tried not getting attached to the dog because he only agreed to adopt it so that it can guard you but ended up spending more time with it rather than doing any work

CHILDE : when you proposed the idea, he was ecstatic. he started rambling about all of the potential pets you could have. both of you agreed on a husky. they’re built for the cold temperatures, perfect for snezhnayan weather. they almost remind you of childe himself, loud, dramatic and a great cuddler. when you guys bought it, he was obsessed. “who’s a good dog that deserves all the belly rubs in the world? you are!” he sometimes gets jealous of the dog if you spend more time with it than him. especially when he comes home and instead of you greeting him, he’s met with you petting the dog and hugging it

KAEYA : instead of talking about it with you, he brings a stray cat home instead. honestly you weren’t really surprised, last time he bought back a snake from one of his missions - he would’ve kept it but you insisted that it should be released. the kitten acted like kaeya, a bit sly and rather cheeky but you loved it either way. every time kaeya was away, the kitten was there to keep you company. sometimes you’d both let it sleep in the bed. you, the kitten and him. could life get anymore perfect?

KAZUHA : a small turtle. they’re slow, low maintenance and ancient. both of you have a busy lifestyle so most of the time you won’t be able to properly maintain an active pet. kazuha loves it all the same though, he’s either writing poems, hanging out with you or just staring at the turtle. “i wonder what you’ve experienced after all the time you’ve spent in this world… did you have a lover?” he takes inspiration from it. likes to sometimes kiss the shell, beidou thinks it’s endearing but also weird.

XIAO: : he just outright says no, we’re not getting a pet and it’s a waste of space. 

ZHONGLI: : definitely most interested in bearded dragons so he’ll ask if you both could find one in the wild adopt one. he likes to stroke his hand over the lizard’s skin, feeling every intricate scale. also, he gets quite worried whenever it starts shedding ‘‘what if something bad happens? what if i accidently harm them?’’ he ends up asking those who have more experience with lizards and takes notes. sometimes, he’d ask ‘‘dear, do you think me and [pet name] look similar?’’ while holding the lizard side by side to his face

[goldengoddess]

call it what you want - bucky barnes

pairing: bucky barnes x reader

summary: falling in love with your best friend is hard, especially if all you want is to wear his initials on a chain round your neck & kiss his face

a/n: oh my god i’m so proud of this i’m in my feels just writing it :’) pls understand the reference and appreciate it, my swiftie heart needs it !!!!! pls lmk what u guys think <3

warnings: a lil angst but honesty it’s very fluffy okay

bucky barnes was not a man of many words. he was a man made up of long looks and subtle hints, mysterious in nature. unpredictable and yet incredibly reliable. 

but most importantly he was a man made up of so so much love. brimming with it, actually. bucky was made to love others.

you knew that, of course. he had shown you in every way how it felt to truly be loved.

but his love was slow, and painful, and often time consuming. the kind of love that came out in little actions, that took months, even years, to really feel it.

you'd been more than happy to be patient. to wait while bucky realized that you weren't going anywhere, that you weren't afraid of him, that he didn't need to push you away. your patience had been worth it, all beautiful things take time.

and your friendship with bucky was just that, beautiful. he trusted you more than any other person in the compound. well, other than steve of course. 

though neither of you had ever said it aloud, you were his person. and he was yours. the two of you relied on each other more than you cared to admit. during missions, when his command and voice had saved you a countless number of times. but also just in your daily lives, where your comforting presence put him at ease in uncomfortable situations.

 your heart was bursting with love and admiration for the man you had watched grow out of his shell into something better, someone stronger.

and how could you not fall in love with someone like james buchanan barnes?

frankly, it was inevitable. 

everything he did made you fall deeper into this sinking, fantastic, terrifying, love for him. the way he said your name. the way he looked for you in a crowd. the way he understood what you were thinking before you even had to say it aloud. the way he always placed his fingers on your back as you walked. the way he adopted a stray cat off the streets and let you name it. 

falling for your best friend? more likely then you might think.

and even though just the color of his eyes made you want to kiss him senseless, you couldn't do anything about it. 

it would be selfish of you to act on your feelings. it would mean taking away the lifelong friendship the two of you had built. 

so as you sat beside him on his bed, your head on his metal shoulder, some cliché movie you told bucky he needed to watch playing in front of you, your heart longed for the soldier sitting next to you. 

bucky's hand traced little patterns on your thigh, just lines and every now and then a small circle. you were more focused on his touch than on the plot of the movie, the way bucky was.

but bucky's mind was on everything but the film. all of his attention was focused on your breathing, the way it hitched slightly whenever he let his fingers linger on your thigh for too long. the way you closed your eyes in content whenever something funny happened. he was watching you, in awe of you. 

lately, bucky couldn't do anything but admire you. 

as the movie played on you fiddled with your hands as a distraction, praying that your plaguing thoughts would calm down so you could enjoy this moment with bucky. but when he started drawing letters on your thigh you knew it was no use. the movie was the last thing you cared about right then. 

you peaked your eyes at him, finding him already watching you. you averted your eyes to his hand on your thigh and focused on the letter. “h” you said out loud, “e,y. hey,” you combined his letters. you felt bucky nod his head and then begin again, spelling out ‘doll’ on your thigh. 

you grinned up at him, feeling the air leave your lungs at the icy blue of his eyes. “hey doll,” you laughed, “hey buck.”

he smiled back at you. the way you said his name made him turn into an absolute mess. he knew he’d do anything for your if you just said his name in that pretty way of yours. 

his smile had a similar effect on you. a blush spread across your cheeks and you moved your eyes back to your fingers on your lap, wishing your had a ring or something to fiddle around with. 

bucky furrowed his brows at your anxious movements, “you okay honey?”

you nodded your head but the anxious butterflies in your stomach increased at his much too sweet nickname. 

he lifted your head off of his shoulder, forcing you to sit cross legged facing you. you let out a small whine at the loss of contact, since he had to move his hand off of your thigh. he chuckled and grabbed your hands so you’d stop moving them around, “honey?”

you let out a sigh, if only you could tell him what was really bothering you. if only you could tell him that every single touch, word, action from him sent your body and mind into overdrive. tell him how unfair it was that he had so much control over you. “just wish i had something to mess with” you said lightly. 

bucky thought on your words for a moment, visually searching his room for something he could give you. then he heard the familiar ‘clink’ of his dog tags touching around his neck. he let out a shaky breath at the idea but this was you. he let go of his hand and slipped the chain off of his neck and around yours.

you let out a small gasp as the cold metal pressed on the back of your neck. your fingers instinctively went to the tags on the chain and pressed them between your fingers. your mouth was parted in shock as you looked up at him, not understanding why he’d given you his most prized possession.

he shrugged, as if it was the most casual thing in the world, “just mess with my dog tags. it’s no big deal.”

that was it. those words send you over the edge. enough was enough. how could he say it wasn’t a big deal? when the action made your mind go wild. it was a big deal, by giving you his tags bucky was giving you yet another part of him.

a part of him you didn’t want to have as just a friend. these tags were meant to mean something. you needed them to mean something. because you wanted to mean something more to bucky.

you let out a scoff and took the chain off of your neck, aggressively placing them back in his hands.

the look on bucky’s face was a mixture of confusion and hurt and it broke your heart in two. but you couldn’t do this anymore, the what if scenarios, questioning if every one of his actions was friendly or romantic, the possibility of something more right around the corner.

you climbed off the bed and patted your wrinkled clothing down. you gave bucky a look that you hoped conveyed what you were feeling, heartbroken and angry. angry that you couldn’t have him the way you wanted to.

“what’s wrong?” bucky asked softly, moving towards the edge of the bed so his feet were placed firmly on the floor.

you shook your head and made your way towards the exit of his bedroom. it was childish, the way you were reacting. your anger wasn’t at bucky, even if you were slightly taking it out on him. it wasn’t even about his dog tags. your anger and hurt was directed towards this situation, towards yourself. you were angry at yourself for falling for the person that meant the most to you in the world.

before you could open the door though, bucky had gotten up and grabbed your wrist, effectively turning you to face him. “doll, what’s wrong?”

you let out an angry huff and poked at his chest, “it’s not a big deal? really buck? they’re your dog tags, they’re the biggest deal! how could you even say that?”

he tilted his head to the side in confusion, “you’re angry about my dog tags?”

you let out a frustrated groan and moved away from him. as you paced back and forth across the room you tried to explain yourself, “it’s not about that! it’s about everything else! it’s about us. i don’t want to not be a big deal to you. i want to wear your initial on a chain ’round my neck! because you really know me! i want those dog tags to be something we can share. but not if it doesn’t mean anything to you. not if it doesn’t mean to you what it means to me. how i feel about you is a big deal james.”

you sucked in a breath and realized you had stopped pacing. you didn’t dare look up at bucky. you knew he was watching you, could feel his stare. you hadn’t outright admitted your feelings but you might as well have. there were few ways to interpret your words.

you watched his feet step closer towards you, until you were sure that if you looked up you would meet bucky’s intense gaze. he didn’t give you much of a choice, grabbing your chin with his flesh fingers and forcing you too look at him.

his eyes were glittering with something new. some hidden feeling you’d only seen a handful of times. an emotion bucky tried to keep hidden away for a long time.

“doll” he pleaded, not adding anything else.

you shook your head and closed your eyes in an attempt to keep your embarrassed tears at bay. “just say it” you said, just say that you don’t want me like that, that i’ve lost you forever.

you kept your eyes closed as you felt him let go of your chin. you prepared yourself to hear him walking away, closing the door behind him, never to speak to you again. instead, for the second time that night, you felt cold metal on the back of your neck and an unfamiliar weight against your chest.

you opened your eyes and found bucky staring at the chain around your neck. he picked up his hand and caressed your cheek lovingly.

he took a deep breath and both of you prepared for whatever he would say next. “honey. i did one thing right, and that was trust you. it was letting you see all the parts of me, and trusting that you would still want me around. you love my love me like i’m brand new. and it’s all i’ve ever wanted. you, are all i’ve ever wanted.”

he picked up the tags hanging on the chain and rubbed them with his other hand, “this is just another part of me i want you to have. you already own my heart and every other part of me, might as well have my initial ’round your neck too.”

the blush on his cheeks made your own face heat up. you couldn’t quiet comprehend what he was saying, couldn’t accept it as a reality. this whole moment felt like a day dream.

bucky ducked his head down and placed his forehead against yours. you closed your eyes happily. all of the anger and tension from earlier, dissipating from your body, replaced by pure bliss at the feeling of bucky so close to you. the air was charged with something new, and the both of you could feel it. and you both welcomed it.

“hey bucky?” you whispered, still not opening your eyes in fear that it would break whatever spell you two were under.

“yes doll?” he whispered back and you could practically hear the smile he was more than likely wearing as he answered.

"what's this thing between us?” you asked hesitantly.

bucky moved his head away from yours, causing you to open your eyes. he grabbed the sides of your face and grinned like a fool, “call it what you want to, i just know i want you.”

later, as the two of you sat tangled together, closer than ever before, you couldn’t help but touch the dog tags around your neck. now they didn’t feel so foreign. they were familiar, the same way bucky was familiar. bucky traced little patterns on your thigh that night, similar to how he had earlier. but now you felt the distinct outline of little hearts, and you knew that nothing else mattered much when you had bucky.