#this back and forth is upsetting innocent people

[notafunkiller]

she chose me

Summary: Steve's hopes get crushed when he wrongly assumes you'd choose him over Bucky.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x agent!female reader

Warnings: 18+, no condom (but f is on birth control), teasing, pet names, jealousy, sergeant + sir + daddy kìnk, vibranium arm kìnk, language, degrading, praising, no mention of y/n etc.

Word Count: 6.9K

Bucky Barnes masterlist

A/N: I really hope you’ll enjoy it! This was inspired by the "She chose me." TikTok trend.

Please, do not repost or translate without my permission!

You’re all quiet, watching the back and forth between Cap and Bucky. Not even Sam intervenes.

“You didn’t-”

“This is just not gonna work, Buck.”

Bucky rolls his eyes, with an expression you like to describe as bitchy. He’s so sassy without even intending to, and you wonder how bitchier he’d be if this wasn’t his best friend talking.

“Let’s see if people agree.”

He looks around waving at you and the rest of the team while Sam just snorts, covering his mouth with his hand.

But you’re not amused because you have no idea how to handle this diplomatically.

“Whose side are you on?” Steve’s tone is deep and authoritative, making you feel a little uneasy.

You don’t know how to talk to Avengers sometimes. You are on friendly terms, even when you train. Sam always cracks jokes, Steve shares stories and gives advice, and Bucky is Bucky. Nat and Sam call him The Machine for a reason. But he’s a really good professor and an even better observer. He pays attention to every recruit and remembers what they need to work on. You find him extra intimidating because he’s also the most beautiful man you’ve ever seen. No exaggeration. And it’s not in the usual clean and golden boy way you are used to, anyway. He’s been through shit and it’s showing in the way he carries himself and doesn’t talk much when it’s not needed.

But you pay attention too, and this is why you think you were chosen to lead the recruits for this mission. You are on good terms with the Avengers, and Bucky probably approved the idea of working with you because you didn’t piss him off like most do. You know he hates chit chat, you learned how to read most of his stares and to not take it personally when he makes remarks about your fighting skills. They’re not your strongest asset, but you have a flair and you come up with the best solutions under pressure. You managed to pin him down once for a few seconds, and that is probably your greatest achievement.

But in moments like this, you don’t know how to say things without upsetting one side.

“You won’t get in trouble, don’t worry,” Bucky adds confidently. You’re not surprised when four out of your six colleagues agree with Bucky. They explain quickly why, emphasizing how much faster and efficient it would be if you followed that route, but their voices are still trembling. And you get it. Telling Captain America to his face you prefer his best friend’s plan over his will always be a risk. But if he gets mad, that says more about him as a leader than about anyone else.

Sam raises his hands in the air defensively, probably enjoying this as a show, but based on the looks he shares with Bucky, it seems like he agrees with him too.

You try to find your words, knowing you’re the last one from your team to speak, but before you can even open your mouth, Steve already smiles, pointing at you with his index finger. “Look at this, though! She agrees with me… She chose me.”

His grin is cold and a little arrogant. What you don’t notice, though, is the intention Steve had when he decided to use those exact words, but Bucky does. And he clenches his jaw at the same time his vibranium hand curls into a fist; a silent response to the not-so-innocent assumption that Steve made.

After a few seconds, Bucky leans in, his gaze steady and confident. “Did she?”

There is no way you would pick Steve’s plan. You are too smart and you have too much integrity to pick his side just to kiss his ass. He raises an eyebrow at you this time, a confident smirk forming on his lips. “Did you really choose him? You really think his plan would work better, doll?”

You feel surrounded by Bucky… attacked even. Your cheeks are getting hotter, too, and you know there is nothing you can do to hide your redness. Doll… He called you that when he turned you again on your back the day you managed to pin him down. It’s something about the way he says it that makes it absolutely deadly. Your first instinct was to be offended, but you reminded yourself he is a man born in 1917. He lived his twenties in the 40s, and doll was used as slang for sweetheart.

Taking a deep breath, you tilt your head slightly, directing your response to Steve. “It’s not about choosing sides, but considering all perspectives for the best outcome. And your plan, Captain, has its strengths, but I’m inclined to agree with Sergeant Bucky.” You bite your lip. “It’s about finding the most effective strategy for the mission, not a personal preference of any kind.”

Steve’s smile falls off, but your attention shifts back to Bucky’s grin that lightens up his face.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

“Well, then,” Steve sighs. “Can I have a word with you in private?”

You don’t realize he’s speaking to you until he says your name.

Surprised, you jump. “Yes, of course.”

*

Steve leans back in his chair, a slight smile playing on his lips as you write down the last details. “You know, I value your insights on the mission.”

You look surprised because how can he value your opinion when this is your second mission only? He’s Captain America!

“Oh?”

“I trust your judgment, and your training is going great. If you and the team chose Bucky’s plan, then we do it.” You see his jaw clench, though, so you know it’s not easy for him to say it. Even if it’s his friend… interesting. “Maybe, when all is over, we could grab a cup of coffee and talk about other things. What do you think?”

You’re silent for a couple of seconds, trying to realize if he means it in the way you think he is. There is no way, right?

Just in case, you offer him a friendly smile, “Thanks, Cap! I value our teamwork too. Coffee sounds great after. It could be a good way for all of us to unwind as a team.”

He nods, sighing. “I’m glad you’re on board. I’m looking forward to that coffee, even if it’s with the whole team. And please, call me Steve.”

So he was flirting…

“Thank you,” you pause as you stand up. “I’m gonna talk with Sergeant Barnes so we can get things ready for tomorrow. Have a good night, Steve!”

*

You knock only three times before the door opens and a Bucky dressed in shorts and a white tank top lets you in with a smirk.

“Sergeant Barnes,” you nod as you take a step inside his bedroom. He only stays here before and after missions when he is too tired to go to his apartment, so you don’t expect to see any personal objects there except for a few clothes.

“What happened to Bucky?”

You look at him surprised, tightening your hold on the tablet you are holding.

What?

“Sir?”

Bucky closes his eyes for a second. “Earlier, during the meeting, you called me Sergeant Bucky.”

Shit!

Maybe you should start calling him Sergeant Barnes in your head as well to avoid these fucks up. You feel so embarrassed that you want to disappear. You don’t want him to think you disrespect him in any way. His rank carries a lot of weight and trauma.

You clear your throat, slightly flustered. “My apologies, Sergeant Barnes. It won’t happen again, sir.” You offer him an apologetic smile while trying very hard to maintain a professional tone.

Bucky’s smirk softens as he places his flesh hand on your shoulder. You feel your legs transforming into jelly.

“My point was, doll, there is no need to be so formal. We’re off-duty here, and titles aren’t necessary. Just call me Bucky.”

“Alright, Bucky,” you smile. “I’m sorry for bothering you, but I came to discuss the plan for tomorrow. I talked to Steve and we agreed it would be wise for you to lead the way as Mr. Wilson-”

“Steve?” Bucky interrupts before you can finish your sentence. He doesn’t even bother to look at your tablet, either.

“Yes, we talked in the office.”

“No, I get that. But you call him Steve? What happened to Cap?” Bucky knows that might sound really childish, but he can’t help it. What is Steve trying to do?

Was it some kind of test? Did you misunderstand everything with Steve?

“Oh, Cap allowed me to call him Steve earlier. I am sorry if it sounded disrespectful.”

He squeezes your shoulder even before moving his hand to your chin, raising your face, and you feel yourself blushing again.

The blue of his eyes is so intense that you can’t see how anyone would be able to survive it.

“You apologize too much, doll. I don’t like it.”

You can’t breathe. “Sor-” You pause, realizing he is right. Apologizing is second nature to you. It feels wrong when you don’t, and you do it without even thinking about it. “I guess I do that a lot. I’ll work on it, Bucky.”

“I’m not your teacher right now, doll.” He smiles, letting go of your chin. “Just remember, we’re not all about formalities here. Relax a bit.”

Easier said than done. But you need to keep it together and ignore the urge to grab his face and finally kiss him. So you focus on talking about the mission and the members of the team. You talk about all of your colleagues, and Bucky helps you take notes. He switched so easily from friendly to the sergeant mode, which is fascinating.

He explains step by step your positions, the way things are gonna happen and even two back up plans. Two!

You’re not overwhelmed by the amount of information, but you’re quite surprised by how much he talks and how well he answers every possible question any of you could have. You don’t think you’ve ever heard him speak for more than a few seconds continuously so you try to focus on every word.

Only when he finishes and you close your tablet after sending everyone the plan, do you see him relaxing again.

With a smirk, he asks you, “How did Steve take it?”

“He was fine with the plan, even suggested if we feel like doing it, to get one or two more members. But based on what you said, we won’t need it.”

“He has a point, of course, but if you said you don’t think you need it, good.” You try not to stare at his lips as he speaks, but it’s so hard. “And I meant how he took that you chose my plan. That you chose me.”

You meet Bucky’s gaze, trying to keep your composure, “Steve seemed more than okay with it from what I saw. He values the team’s decision. Plus, it’s not about choosing sides, and-”

“And not a personal preference of any kind,” he interrupts just to quote you, and you don’t know if you should feel flattered he remembers word by word or to prepare yourself for a negative reaction. To be honest, your head is spinning and him being so close makes it worse. “I heard you very well, but I’m curious…”

He extends his hand and carefully tucks your hair behind your ears. You swear you can hear your own heartbeat going crazy. And if you do, so does he.

“About what?”

“Would the answer be different if it was about personal preferences, doll? Would you choose him?”

You freeze. You are simply in shock because this cannot happen to you. From Steve asking you out earlier to your crush basically doing this. You’re confused and a little tired, but you didn’t imagine all of this. Does Bucky want you? Is that it?

You take a deep breath praying you won’t choke on the words. “In a hypothetical scenario based on personal preferences, Bucky, I would still not pick him.”

Your voice is trembling, but you maintain eye contact even after admitting it. You didn’t choose Bucky’s plan because of your crush, so you shouldn’t feel embarrassed or exposed. He’s the one who let you call him Bucky, who touched you and asked you that. You don’t know if he counts romance as a personal preference, but there is an urge inside you to find out. You wonder how he’d taste, if he’d kiss you back if you kissed him first, how your mission would be if you crossed the line. Your thoughts are foggy.

“So you’d choose me.”

You clear your throat. “Yes.”

“Over Captain America.” His grin is so boyish and cute that it makes you smile. He looks younger and less… burdened when he gets like this. Bucky chuckles, a mischievous glint in his eyes, “Well, well, well. Looks like I got someone not kissing Captain America’s ass for a change. That’s really rare. You’re a naughty one, aren’t you?”

You mask your gasp with a cough, deciding to play along, a sly grin forming on your face. “Maybe I just have a thing for underdogs.”

Bucky’s eyes light up with amusement to your annoyance but also excitement, and he leans in, taking the tablet from your hand and placing it on the floor without a care. “Underdogs, huh? Ouch, that hurt a little. I thought I was your favorite super-soldier.”

You can’t help but giggle, feeling enough encouragement from his reaction to touch his vibranium arm just to feel it. You got the chance to do it only for a couple of seconds and it always fascinated you, especially the golden pattern. The fact he can feel everything because it’s connected to his nerves is insane to you. It probably is to him too. “Oh, you are. And my favorite teacher too. But a little competition never hurts, Sergeant Barnes.”

You can see he feigns offense. “Competition, huh?” Bucky’s playfulness turns into a serious tone as he adds, “Well, let me show you why I’m the only choice.”

And without warning, he closes the distance between you and kisses you.

You gasp, taken aback, but you bring your hands to his face and hip before you deepen the kiss. He’s not as gentle as you expected, his left arm flying to your ass and bringing your hips closer to his immediately.

You moan when you feel his hard on so close to your pussy, and tug on his hair a little.

“Aren’t you a naughty girl?” He lowers his lips to your jaw. “I could basically smell how wet you got earlier as soon as I called you doll. And so did Steve.”

You want to open your eyes and tell him to stop talking about his friend. You don’t want to be turned off, but he already continues.

“He thought he stood a chance with my girl.”

“Your girl?” You whimper when his teeth graze your neck before his tongue licks on the spot. He intends to leave a mark, you have no doubt, and you absolutely love it.

“Mine.” His whisper makes you shiver. “I want to mark you. The thought of having you covered in hickeys during the mission makes me so hard it almost hurts. Gonna show everyone you belong to me.”

“Do I belong to you, Sergeant Barnes?” You take a step back but let your hand linger on his chest teasingly. “Because I don’t remember you asking me to dinner.”

Bucky grins. “Dinner is a classic move, and I adapted very well to the present. But of course I can stop with the kisses right now, and we can have some late dinner.”

You roll your eyes at his unbelievably good answer. Fucker!

“This is not what I meant, Barnes, and you know it.”

“I don’t know it. But I want to know something else.”

You don’t even doubt he means something dirty because it’s too obvious.

“Like what?”

“Like how your pretty pussy tastes while you come all over my face.”

You gasp at the no-filter words. You’re so used to Steve’s warning you to use proper language, that you did not expect it.

“I thought men your age were all about being proper and refined… Don’t they teach subtlety in the 40s etiquette class or did you skip it?”

You tease him on purpose, and he knows it. You are well aware what a nerd he was in school. Such a nerd that it was displayed in the museum. You snort. You were a nerd too, so you love it.

Bucky chuckles, a mischievous gleam in his eyes as he brings his hands to your pants, unzipping them without warning. Holy. Shit. The way you love this. He reads your body language very well and he has his super soldier senses.

“Well, doll, proper and refined went out the window with the 40s, right? Because otherwise you’d not be standing here letting me undress you.”

You raise your eyebrow, a mix of surprise and amusement on your face. His energy is so light, and he looks like a man without a worry in moments like this.

“You’re the one who offered to show me what the little upgraded version of you can do, after all.” You take off your shoes before pulling down your pants as soon as he drags them to your ankles. You can’t believe you’re about to fuck James Bucky Barnes! “Why would I say no?”

“Just sit back and enjoy the ride, doll. Gonna make sure you have the time of your life.”

You snort, amused by his eagerness, and decide to take off your shirt yourself to see his reaction. And he doesn’t disappoint.

He grins like a child, his hands flying straight to your back without taking his eyes off your chest. And before you know it, your bra is on the floor and Bucky cups your breasts, bringing your left tit to his mouth.

If you gasped when you felt the cold touch of the vibranium, now you moan loudly, enjoying the way he licks around your skin. He avoids your nipple on purpose, so you decide to take matters into your own hands quite literally and get a grab of the top of his hair, forcing him to suck on your nipple.

“Fuck! I didn’t expect you to be so whorish,” you say without realizing, and you feel his snort and breath on the wet patch he left with his tongue.

Bucky’s grin turns into a sly smirk. “This is what you call whorish? I guess I’ll give you an experience you won’t ever forget.”

“Talk less, do more.”

You want to enjoy more of this. You have a mission in a few hours, and it might be just a one time thing anyway since he is Bucky Barnes. You don’t want to get your hopes high.

Bucky lets go of your breast with a pop and moves up, raising your head so he can kiss you.

It’s electrifying, and desperate, and not enough. You move your hands to the bottom hem of his tank top and lift it, interrupting the kiss so you can take it off completely. You just want to feel him, all of him.

You step back for a second, wanting to look at him properly, but you notice a change in his eyes that he, of course, tries to mask.

“Why are you nervous? You look like a fucking god! I should be nervous here.”

Bucky’s eyes flicker with vulnerability.

“I guess I’m not used to someone seeing my scars or my,” he waves toward his vibranium arm, and you frown.

“I will sound totally weird, but they all make you really cool, Serge.” You trace down a few scars when you see he is completely relaxed and continue. “Do I have to lick them all to make you believe me?”

You move your hands under his shorts before he can answer, though, finally touching his cock. You both moan at the feeling. He’s hard and thick, and the head is wet. You bring your fingers to his lips, smearing some of the precome before leaning in to suck it off.

You’re not prepared for his moan or for the way he attacks your mouth, and definitely not for him to snap your underwear using his flesh hand. Not even his vibranium one!

You moan into his mouth. He makes you feel like you’re floating and you need to fuck him right then.

“You’re not just whorish, you’re a whore!” You pause when you feel his fingers close to your entrance. “No wonder why you didn’t belong in the 40s.” Then you move, allowing him to touch you. You don’t realize what you said, and when you do, in the middle of dragging his shorts down, you curse yourself in your mind. It sounds like the most disrespectful thing ever. This man’s fate was changed by monsters who cryogenically freezing him and brainwashing him, and you are selfishly talking as if he belonged to you. “I’m sorry that was awful of-” But he interrupts you before you can get a chance to properly apologize.

“You like that, don’t you?”

A wave of shame surges through your body. Your cheeks are burning.

“I’m really sorry,” you take your hands off his shorts and look away, not even peaking at his cock. You ruined it, didn’t you? “I will just go.”

Bucky shakes his head, puffing. “For such an amazing agent, you’re not a good room reader, are you?”

Your eyes finally drop to his cock, which you’ve been trying to avoid in the last minute out of shame, but there’s no need anymore since he’s teasing you. He’s just a bit longer than average, and he’s really thick, and the veins do not make it ugly at all. You are curious how it’d feel in your hand, how much it’d twitch, how Bucky would moan.

“You aren’t a good room reader, either then, Barnes, since I’m not getting dicked down and my hair pulled, am I?”

Something snaps in him, and it’s visible in his eyes. You don’t know what to expect so you just watch him. But you can’t. He is so quick that, despite your crazy training, you don’t anticipate his move. His hand wraps around the hair from your nape and fists it hard enough for you to move along with him.

“Wanna be dicked down? Fine by me, get on your hands and knees.”

You’re surprised, of course you are, but his tone is firm and you find yourself nodding and doing what he told you. You know you can say no; there is nothing in Bucky’s energy that makes you feel unsafe or as if you have no choice.

At the same time, he lets go of your hair just so he can take off his shorts completely.

“Are you not gonna make sure I’m wet enough for you?” You ask when you see him getting closer to you again, even though you are very wet. You just want to push his buttons.

“I can smell you if I focus on it, let me remind you.” He smiles. “I know you’re soaked, and you wanna be dicked down. Or are you backing off?”

Challenging prick!

You roll your eyes. “I’m not scared of your dick.”

“Good, because he wants to be friends with you.”

You close your eyes, cringing. “God, you were this close to turning me off.” You raise your hand in the air, putting your weight on the left one as you bring your thumb and index finger close to each other to show him exactly what a thin line this was.

Bucky laughs, shaking his head. “Don’t worry, I’m gonna make you forget it in a second.”

Your first instinct is to want to tease him about the second remark, to ask him if this is how long he can last, but you’re too horny now. And you also need rest for the mission tomorrow.

“How, uh…” You pause not knowing how to ask this properly. “Can you, uh, make babies?” You cringe at your words. “I mean, widows can’t… and I just wanted to know if we need a condom to be extra careful since you might be extra fertile because I am on the pill and I have no idea how sex with a super sold-”

Bucky’s lips press against yours suddenly, making you stop talking.

“Breathe.”

“I’m breathing,” you whisper and he cups your face.

“Not enough. We can use a condom if you want, but I’ll need to check where I can find one. Or we can go bare if you trust me… I can pull out and you are already protected, so there shouldn’t be a problem, I think.” He pauses to kiss your lips again. “But we can still use a condom anyway to be extra careful as you said.”

You frown at that, suddenly more desperate to feel him bare than ever before.

“No, I trust you. I have never done it without a condom before, and I assume you didn’t have much time to uh… have sex.”

Bucky snorts amused. “Now why do you assume that?”

“You look like you haven’t been fucked since 1945.”

The fact he doesn’t even deny it makes you feel even bolder, so you reach for his cock and place your thumb on his wet head while wrapping the rest of your hand around the length. “Are you gonna even last for a second once you’re inside me, Sergeant Barnes?” You snort when you see him trying to hold back his moan by biting his lip. It makes you feel happy. “Or do you even manage to get inside me before- ahh!” He is predictable this time as he pulls your hair, so you laugh.

“Are you familiar with this whole red, yellow, green color code?”

You gasp. “Yes, read about it, never needed it. But how do you know that?”

“I read about it, too.” His grin is so wide and beautiful that you melt again.

“Quite naughty of you, Serge. Reading dirty books. Needed some ideas?”

Bucky smirks, kissing you again and again. “Gonna need a review after I finish with you.”

“You finishing with me?” You smile. “Big words, Barnes, but no action.”

He knows you challenge him, and you don’t try to hide it. Do you have to beg for his cock for him to finally fuck you? He is edging you on purpose at this point.

You let out a whimper in anticipation when he moves behind you.

“Are you sure you’re fine with no condom?”

“Ihm, I’m not ovulating anyway,” you whisper, trying not to sound too eager. But you are. You want to get dicked down, indeed. And you wanted it for months.

His silence makes you a bit nervous, but the sounds of him dropping to his knees behind you, followed by his hand grabbing his cock and positioning it at your entrance while squeezing your hip with the metal arm.

You love the sensation of the coldness, but you love even more when he leans in to kiss your back before he pushes inside you.

It takes two tries, though, for him to be able to push halfway inside you because you kept pushing his dick out of you instantly. You managed to take him only when he brought his fingers to your clit and rubbed a bit.

You still laughed though because the sounds were too funny and his little frustrated whimpers were hilarious. The amusement turns quickly into more horniness when you feel him stretching you without even being fully inside you. You dreamed and daydreamed about it… fantasized about it, but it still wasn’t even close to how it actually feels. How full it feels. It’s like you cannot even think, your body is weak.

“Fuck,” your voice is cracking. “Deeper.”

“You’re so fucking tight,” he whispers.

“So?” You bring your hand to his ass, trying to show him you really need it deeper. “Why do you make it sound like a bad thing? Or are you trying not to come, Mr. Super Soldier?”

“You have quite a mouth on you, I think you need it-”

“You talk way too much. Are you nervous or-” It’s his turn to interrupt you with a thrust. Such a deep thrust your head is spinning. He’s not fully inside you, you realize, but he doesn’t try to, instead, he starts to fuck you, taking your breath away. His fingers leave your clit, grabbing your hips with both hands.

There is no question anymore, just fucking as you wanted.

And it feels like heaven. You try to keep your eyes open just so you look at him over your shoulder, but it’s impossible.

“Cat got your tongue?”

You groan. “No, you did, n-now fuck me harder.”

“Well, well,” he slows down and you almost wanna die. “This is not how you talk to your Sergeant, is it?”

He can’t do this!

“Fuck you!”

“What does my baby want?” His thrusts are too slow and teasing, just like his voice. “Use your words, beg for it.”

You’re not turned off, surprisingly. Not at all, on the contrary, the firm tone he uses, the words… you’re getting hornier, if that is even possible.

“I love your cock, Sergeant, so please give it to me. Fuck me harder and faster. Need you to pull my hair, and choke me, and… be rough.” You would be embarrassed if you weren’t so desperate. You know he wouldn’t make fun of you for this, so you trust him.

“Only mine.” You take a deep breath relieved when you feel his right hand wrap around your hair. “Do you hear me? Answer me.”

You nod, unable to say anything because he starts to thrust hard and fast, just like he did before he stopped. Your tits are jumping at the impact, and you have to dig your toes into the floor.

“Use your words. If you want my,” he moans. “If you want my cock and my hand wrapped around your neck, you have to use your big girl words. Tell me you’re only mine.”

You can’t hold back your tears this time. You love it so much, you can’t believe you waited so long to have him.

“Only yours.”

“No Steve.”

He lets go of your hair, wrapping his hand around your neck. No pressure, not moving it, he’s just holding it there.

“There’s n-no Steve, Sergeant. Only you. My pussy belongs to you. I o-only want to get filled by you.”

You know he’s smiling without needing to look at him.

“You love your Sergeant’s cock, don’t you?” You have no idea how he’s able to speak while thrusting so hard. He’s a fucking robot, indeed. “No one else could give you this, no matter how much they tried.”

You feel the building in your core. You’re so, so close already, so you try to place your weight on only one hand and bring the other to cover his, and before he can say something, you encourage him to choke you by pressing his fingers on the sides of your neck.

You moan so loudly you surprise even yourself. You sound like a cat.

“Please, sergeant, please, choke me.” You repeat your move and you close your eyes. “Please, daddy, I’m so c-close.”

He pauses for a second, and you don’t know why.

Before you can ask what’s wrong, he doesn’t just start to thrust inside you again, he dicks you down just the way you wanted. It’s as if he fucks the air out of your lungs every time you exhale. You’re crying and screaming at this point, so loud the whole floor must hear you. But you’re not ashamed. You feel so close you can almost taste it.

You barely hear his whimpers, but they’re there and they’re so beautiful.

You get no warning when he decides to squeeze the sides of your neck: gently at first, but then? Perfect. So perfect you come without warning, not being able to even say his name. You just scream some nonsense, your hand dropping from his to the floor so you can ground yourself properly. Your whole body is burning, and burning, and burning, coming alive for what feels like an eternity.

He doesn’t wait even for a second after you come down from your orgasm. Instead, he gets his dick out of you, grabbing you by your ass and raising you in his arms. Still weak, you barely have the strength to wrap your legs around his waist and your hands around his neck. He’s sweaty but not that hot. His metal arm is making you cool down.

“Daddy’s gonna take good care of you.” His lips find your forehead and you fight the urge to kiss his neck. You feel so small in his arms… and as if no one can hurt you.

You’re smiling like a fool when your back hits his bed, and so is he. Such a beautiful, blinding smile.

You let him spread your legs before you drag his face down so you can kiss him. You bite his lip hard until he opens his mouth, moaning when you feel him entering you again. This time, you’re relaxed so he thrusts inside you so much easier.

“Gonna make you come again around your daddy’s cock..”

His hands wrap your legs around his ass when he starts to thrust again.

“You’re quite… into it, Sergeant Barnes. So dirty!”

He gently grabs your jaw. “Tongue out.”

You do it, opening your mouth and waiting, and waiting until you finally understand what he’s about to do.

Instead of being grossed out, as you expected, you eagerly swallow the saliva that he lets drip from his mouth, which lands on your tongue.

You bat your eyes as you start to move your hips to meet his thrusts halfway, and that sends him into a frenzy.

“Fucking hell, you don’t want to sleep tonight, do you?” He asks sarcastically, but you don’t have enough air to tease him with a stamina comment. “You want me to make you scream and swallow my spit and come till we have to go to that fucking mission. Till your beloved Steve needs to come to us himself and hear us covered in come but still fucking.” You moan at the idea of your teammates finding out about this. You get awful comments anyway; at least you can get him for real and rub it in their faces. “You would like that, wouldn’t ya? Having all my undivided attention on you, not caring that my best friend is mad…” The thrusts are so deep that your head falls on the pillow instantly. You cannot keep your eyes open for even a second and you’re crying again. “Not caring my pal wanted you so badly he even tried to take you out tonight.”

“Sergeant-”

Thrust after thrust. You grab his forearm as tightly as you can so you can have something to hold onto.

“He thought he could have you, that you’d choose him. Come on, love. Come on, scream my name, let them hear. Let them all hear whose cock you cry for. Who is the one you belong to.” His balls slap against your skin so hard they tickle you. But not even that can distract you from almost reaching your orgasm. His words, his cock, his possessiveness…

“Sergeant, please. No one but you, can I… c-can I touch my clit? I’m so, so close.”

You don’t have to, though, because he is quick enough to bring his flesh hand between your bodies and rub your clit just the way you need it.

“F-fuck, coming,” you manage to warn him before the pleasure hits you. It’s so overwhelming you see white, digging your nails into his forearm.

You don’t know what you call him… daddy, Bucky or sergeant, but it doesn’t matter. You hear his praise, how you’re his good girl, and his words encouraging you to come for him.

When you can focus again, you kiss him with everything you have.

“Need you to come for me, Sergeant Barnes,” you whisper between kisses. “Need you to come inside me, need you to fill me up with your come, sir.”

He hisses loudly, his eyes being more grey than blue.

“Don’t tease me.”

“I mean it,” you make eye contact, wrapping your legs tighter around him. “Not the heat of the moment. I need your come, daddy. I’m on birth-”

He kisses you so hard your teeth end up hitting, but you don’t care. This is everything.

“Gonna come, gonna give you what you want. Gonna make you my come s-slut. Is that what you needed?”

“Yes, yes.” You’re so excited to watch him finish you don’t even realize how much you like being called his come slut until he says it again. “Come on, Sergeant, come for me.”

After you say that, it only takes him two more thrusts to finish, moaning your name.

His eyes close, and you notice how pretty his eyelashes are. And the little moles on his face… his mouth semi-open and his hair in all directions.

You want to witness this every day.

Before you can stop yourself, you lean in to kiss his nose and cheeks, letting your hips move at the same time.

“C-can’t… doesn’t stop,” he manages to groan, and you bring your hand to his nape, caressing his hair as he rides out his orgasm.

When he finally finishes, though, his head falls on top of your breasts, his mouth finding your nipple and playing with it before sucking it fully into his mouth.

“Easy, Bucky,” you moan, but he keeps going, though.

You have to pull his hair, to make him stop.

“Don’t get me wrong, I love it, but I need to uh… I’m tired.”

You’re back to your shy self. But his smile still makes you feel so relaxed.

“Got you tired, huh?” He winks, giving your breasts a kiss before pressing his lips against yours. “Fuck, I’ve never been so aroused in my entire life. Won’t even mention how happy I am.”

“Me neither,” you whisper.

“Well, we need to get used to it.”

You laugh so happily that you think your chest will explode. It’s surreal.

“You owe me that dinner after all.”

“A million dinners.”

You roll your eyes playfully. “Trying to charm me?”

He pecks you one more time before getting out of you with a whimper.

“I’ve already done it.”

It’s weird to be empty like this again, but seeing your come and wetness on his pubic hair or dripping out of your pussy just to soak the sheets beneath you distracts you. You made a mess.

“We need to clean this.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he says distractedly as he uses his index finger to push some come back inside you. Jesus! “This is the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.”

You smile. “You’re a whore.”

“Your whore.” He slowly gets out of bed, grabbing his shorts from the floor.

“Want me to go?” You ask all of a sudden, gaining a confused look from him.

“Why would I want that? Unless you do, of course…” He runs a hand through his hair, trying to fix it a little. “But I want you to stay.”

“Saw you dressing.” You bring your knees up just to put your chin on top of them. You feel extra shy.

He smiles. “Just gonna get you some water. I don’t want you dehydrated.”

*

Bucky knew Steve was in the kitchen as soon as he went down the stairs. He smiles casually, not giving him a second look as he goes straight to the fridge. It’s not like he hasn’t seen him in shorts or shirtless before, and Bucky knows he knew exactly what happened upstairs.

“Can’t sleep?” Steve’s tone is so obvious Bucky almost laughs.

“Not sleepy yet. What about you? You’re alright, punk?”

“Yeah,” he says, taking a sip from his own glass of water; his hands tightly wrapped around the glass.

“Still mad about earlier? You know I’m right.”

Steve shakes his head. “No, it’s all good.”

Bucky sighs dramatically. He loves Steve, he is his brother, but sometimes he is so annoying.

“Well, try to get some sleep. I suggest you wear some earplugs or something, though,” Bucky suggests casually, taking a whole bottle of water. “We wouldn’t want you too sleepy tomorrow. And the night is young.” He even winks at Steve, making him clear his throat.

“Buck…”

“Not a super soldier perk, I know, but you understand, right?” The smirk he suddenly gives Steve is almost sinister. “She chose me after all, and I gotta let her test-drive me. Have a good night!”

Even though he turns around, Bucky doesn’t miss the way Steve’s hold gets so tight that his glass almost breaks.

Bucky doesn’t regret it. He had it coming when he thought you’d choose him.

[auroralwriting]

Hi love! I’d like to request a mob!bucky fic where he is the man that runs New York and the reader is his wife who convinces him to let her start opening hospitals and homes for people in need etc. one of his rivals tries to take her while at a charity thing and calls Bucky weak and losing his touch so he literally destroys him to protect his woman.

I understand if you are too busy but would love ya forever if you could write what has been in my head!

guard dog

mob!bucky barnes x wife!reader

bucky doesn't take too kindly to people hurting his wife.

word count: 1.7k | warnings: violence, cursing, bucky having a sweet spot for his doll ♡

i wrote this one so fast. thank you for this amazing request!! i hope i did your vision justice!

Everyone knew of Mr. James Barnes. He practically ran New York with every politician pressed under his palm, along with every rich business man and woman wrapped around his little finger.

The one thing you needed to understand about James, Bucky, as his wife called him, was that you were never to be messed with.

To Bucky, you were the epitome of innocence. No one was allowed to lay a finger on you or say anything that could even potentially upset you. You were his world, and he made sure it was protected.

Of course, he was absolutely right. You were truly an angel on earth, the truest definition of kind. Little did everyone know, while they were wrapped around Bucky's finger, he was wrapped around yours.

"Bucky, you cannot kill someone on a Sunday," You'd gripe. "Sunday's are holy days, and the days I make my cannoli. You don't want cannoli?" Bucky would give in, rescheduling to fit your needs. "And see if that guy wants a cannoli, too. If I were gonna die, I'd sure as hell want a nice, homemade cannoli."

You practically controlled his every little move. You kept Bucky somewhat grounded for a mobster. You also made sure to keep him from disappearing off the face of the earth.

"Hun, you mom's coming over for dinner tomorrow- No, I don't want to hear it! Anyone who had the guts to raise you and not lose their mind deserves a nice, home cooked meal with her family. Dinner, six o'clock, be there."

Your latest topic, though, was helping people. You didn't give too much mind to the people Bucky worked with, but your mind was set on the homeless. Some news report on CNN had utterly convinced you that you needed to be the change in the world.

"Buck, please!" You begged, latching your hands onto your husbands arm. "This is my calling!"

A small grin formed on Bucky's face, "I thought your calling was to foster little orphans. Or was it to start an animal rescue. Oh, maybe-"

"James, I'm serious!" Use of Bucky's real name was a sign you wanted him to take you seriously. "Please, I just want to help the innocent people out there who don't have anything or anyone."

With your puppy dog eyes gleaming at him, Bucky knew he couldn't say no. "Alright, alright. But I get to choose the place since I'm buying."

A large smile erupted on your face as you leaped to hug Bucky. "Oh, thank you! Thank you so much, baby!"

Bucky's wide palms rubbed your back softly as he kissed your head. "Anything for my precious world."

And so, the hunt for the perfect shelter was in place. Immediately, you called some friends to bounce ideas back and forth off them. Eventually, you decided on the name Feast. Food, emergency aid, shelter, and training. It was everything anyone could ever need. It was perfection.

Even Bucky had to agree, it sounded pretty solid. He was amused at the acronym, enjoying the excitement your project gave you.

After a few months, Feast was nearly up and running. To gather attention, you decided to host a gala. Bucky helped you invite anyone and everyone important. You needed to get Feast's name out there, and the big people were who would do it. Secretly, Bucky only agreed because he knew he could.. convince the ones who denied to lend a hand.

The night of the gala approached. You sat with Natasha, as she finished putting on her makeup. "Natty, you look so pretty already."

"Yeah, but you know Steve likes the shimmer. I just want to add a little bit more," Natasha replied, referring to her husband, aka Bucky's best friend. It helped a lot that your best friend was married to Bucky's best friend. Natasha and you did almost everything together.

"Steve would like you if you wore a cardboard box," You groaned. "Come on, we're going to be late!"

Natasha laughed as she stood up, "Alright, alright! You, Mrs. Barnes, are going to have a wonderful outcome I hear."

Your heart leaped at her words. "Really?"

"Yeah, I heard anyone's who's anyone is coming." You squealed at Natasha's words and lead her down to the limo where Bucky and Steve were waiting.

The moment Bucky laid eyes on you, he felt like he was falling in love all over again. "Doll," He breathed out, holding your waist carefully with both hands. "You're an angel,"

You blushed at his words, "You always know just what to say to me,"

"That's why you married me," Bucky teased, knowing all too well there were too many reasons to name as to why you married him. He still felt so lucky.

"You both look amazing," Steve complimented. "But if we don't get going soon, we'll be late."

Quickly, the four of you shimmed into the limo, having some champagne and listening to soft music while you made your way to the gala. You'd left all the interior planning up to Natasha, who's taste was the best in all of New York. You trusted her with your life. After making your way into the hall, it was solidified once more that Natasha was incredible.

The hall was beaming with gold and silver, a soft jazz band playing and a bustling bar full of the most appealing looking drinks you'd seen in a long time. You gave Natasha a thankful look as Bucky began to softly pull you away. He'd spotted the Mayor, and he was itching to make conversation.

It was probably two hours of chit chat later and you found your feet aching from your insanely high heels. You leaned up to Bucky's ear, "Hun, I'm going to go grab a drink. Want anything?"

"Rum?" Bucky muttered back as you gave an eager smile.

You sat at the bar, ordering yours and Bucky's drink. After a moment or so, you noticed the presence of someone in the seat beside you who wasn't there previously.

"Mrs. Barnes," You looked over to see Brock Rumlow. He, too, was a mobster. However, he wasn't one Bucky or Steve were particularly fond of. You didn't even know he was invited tonight. "What a lovely event this is."

"Oh, Mr. Rumlow," You said with surprise laced in your voice. "Thank you, it took a lot of preparation."

"I'm just surprised," Rumlow hummed. "Such a.. charitable thing your husband is endorsing."

You shook your head, "It was all my idea."

"Of course it was," Rumlow bitterly responded. "Barnes' pretty little play thing wanted a new passion project to occupy herself. How expected."

You felt your heart pang at his words. "Oh," You stuttered, losing any sense of confidence.

"I got you at a loss for words?" Rumlow's voice was low as he began to lean over your figure. It felt daunting rather than sultry. It felt dangerous.

"Rumlow, please back up a little bit," You pleaded as Rumlow's smirk grew. "I don't have any space."

"That's the point, baby girl." He continued to prowl over you like a hungry beast, ready to pounce on its prey. For a moment, you felt overcome with fear. The way Rumlow eyed you made you wish you had worn a more conservative dress.

Before you could blink, Rumlow was pushed back harshly. It caused you to jump up and into someones arms. You didn't even need to question who it was; you knew Bucky's touch anywhere.

"What the fuck were you doing with my girl?" Bucky growled as Rumlow shook himself out of shock.

"Just making conversation," Rumlow dryly responded. "She's a joy to talk to."

Bucky scoffed, "It looked like you were about to drag her out of here."

"And so what if I was?" Rumlow challenged. "What would you do, huh, Barnes? You've gone weak, she's making you lose your touch. You're just her silly little guard dog. No one's scared of you when everyone knows that you'd never do anything to upset your precious-"

Before Rumlow could even finish his sentence, Bucky was on top of him, punches pushing his head back and forth, left and right. The sickening sounds of skin against skin was too much for you to bare, but luckily, Steve had come right on time. He was quick to pull you behind him where Natasha was waiting to hold you in her arms.

"Don't you dare call me fuckin' weak!" Bucky yelled. All eyes were on the scene unfolding.

The crack of Rumlow's jaw was not to be missed as Bucky's fist collided with it so hard you could've sworn Bucky broke some of his teeth. "You think you can come here to my wife's gala and try me?"

You wanted to stop Bucky, but you could tell that with his anger, thee was no stopping him until he was done. More sounds of cracking, Rumlow's howls of pain, and the blow's of Bucky's beatings were all that echoed in the hall.

After a few minutes, Bucky slowly stopped, panting as he leaned over Rumlow breathlessly. It was then you stepped in, running behind Bucky and putting your hands on his shoulders. "Buck, c'mon. Let me get you cleaned up." Blood was splattered on Bucky's face, his fists drenched in it. You nodded to Steve who, once Bucky was standing, picked Rumlow over his shoulder and took him out of the building. Natasha waved the band who began playing, and everyone fell back into conversation almost as if nothing happened.

Bucky and you were silent as the bartender handed you some towels to clean Bucky up. "Did you see any of that?" Bucky asked softly, his tone much different than a few minutes beforehand.

"Steve pulled me behind him," You answered, wiping off Bucky's knuckles. They were already bruising due to the beatings on them.

"Good man," He nodded, knowing that he would have done the same for Natasha. They protected each other's girls, always. "I'm sorry this happened tonight. I didn't mean to ruin the gala."

You chuckled, forcing Bucky to look up and around. "Look, nothing's ruined. You don't think these people are used to this stuff?"

Bucky gave a soft smile in return as his fingers fell across your cheek, softly rubbing it. "What did I do to deserve you?"

"Endlessly protect and love me, to start." You cheekily replied.

"Yeah," Bucky nodded, kissing you softly. "Always." He added as he pulled away. "Now, come on. I don't think we spoke to the Stark's yet."

[yuwuta]

love f2l where he’s already hopelessly in love with you and pining in a way that’s so obvious to everyone else but you, but also love the moment in f2l where it clicks that “oh shit… i think my friend just turned me on.” even better when one person doesn’t realize they’ve turned the other one on and they’ve just gotta live with the memory replaying in their head for a few days. friends keep saying they’re distracted and they just nod their head like yeah uh sorry… was uh… sorry what were we talking about? bc these days if it’s not about that moment, zero processing has gone on 

megumi and satoru are the worst at coping with this. 

for megumi, it’s such a 180, a switch has been completely turned on when it happens, that it makes him upset. he can’t even tell if he’s angry that it happened in the first place, that he couldn’t tell he was attracted to you before, that he can’t stop thinking about it now, or that it’s possible that other people could have already had this realization and be thinking of you like this too. every option brings a mean scowl to his face. and it’s embarrassing above all because you were just trying to take off your shoes. when lifting your leg and holding onto to his bicep wasn’t enough, you crouch down to struggle with the straps instead. megumi sighs—all he wanted to do was get your drunken ass home in one piece and now you’re crouched down in the middle of the street, and when he looks down to see what’s taking so long, that’s when it hits him. you bent down like that, looking up at him and groaning and pulling on his shirt and whining for him to help you does very terrible things to him. and it shouldn’t, you’re only calling for him because you lack the hand-eye coordination (and clearly critical thinking because this is the middle of the road and you cannot walk barefoot) right now to undo your shoes, but it’s your blown pupils and pout and the calling for him—you have to stop whining. and saying his name. immediately—not to mention the angle and tilt of your head to look up at him. megumi can barely help himself, much less you, which is why he grumbles, hoists you up by the scruff of your neck so you’re standing up right. you giggle in your haze but megumi just hisses his teeth, tells you “stop looking at me like that,” and before your mind can catch up, he grabs you by the waist and hoists you over his shoulder because looking at your face is not an option right now. and this is for the best for everyone—now your feet don’t hurt, you’ve stopped groaning, there’s no more eye contact, and megumi has the rest of the walk back to your apartment to contemplate what the fuck just happened to him 

for satoru, it’s actually partially his fault, because not only is it so far from sexual and yet turns him on anyway, but he’s so annoying that his actions lead to a cascade of other terrible turn-ons that and now it’s a cyclical problem. you’re just borrowing something of his for the convince of it—his glasses because it’s sunny, or maybe his jacket because it’s cold, something small and innocent—but it ignites such a strong flame in him that his visceral reaction is to snatch it right back from you, and run away like some school girl. “hey—satoru what the fuck, come on, you weren’t even using it!” you call, but your voice is already an echo at the speed he’s scurried away from you. the flash vision of you in his belongings was terrible, but it’s the memory of it that makes it worse, brings a blush to his face, and leave him shaking his head like a crazy person because what the fuck this is insane. you didn’t even do anything so he has no reason to act like this, there’s no way the slightest insinuation of you thinking of him/his belongings as something to borrow, or hold, or have should make him react this way, but it does. and he hates it. and he’s not normal about it at all, and it takes you confronting him, grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him back and forth, asking him what the fuck is wrong with him, which is warranted, but worse because that also leaves him red from his face to his check with Awful Realization Numbers 2 and 3: (2) you usually just Deal with him being strange, but right now you’re mad and you’re really hot when you’re mad, and (3) you’re very close to choking him out right now and if you did, he wouldn’t stop you

yuuji is the one who has had this effect on more people than he knows, which is hilarious to think about because he’s either completely oblivious, or using his charm to play innocent. and when you have that moment, you’re definitely left stunned. you were just fishing for more snacks for your self-care night—a tradition that used to between you and nobara, but now includes megumi, and most times yuuji, but tonight, he had plans with todo, which you were grateful for because there’s no way you could have been around him after what happened. in a hurry to grab his water bottle from the fridge, yuuji doesn’t bother you with words to maneuver through the cramped kitchen, just mindlessly puts his hands on your hips, lifts you, pivots, puts you down, grabs his water bottle, puts it on the counter, lifts you again, pivots, and places you right back where you were, flashing you a million-dollar smile, before grabbing his bottle and rushing out to catch the bus. you’re left blinking, body on autopilot as you finally reach for the chips, and zombie-like when you make your way back to the living room where nobara’s putting a sheet mask on megumi. when you’re finally seated on the couch, you blink for the first time, blurting out to nobody in particular, “is… is itadori hot?” and it’s comedic how quick, blasé, and autonomic the in-sync replies from both megumi and nobara are, “yes”, “unfortunately.” oh. well that’s reassuring you suppose. you might have been the last to realize it, but at least you’re not alone. 

if you told yuuta he had the ability to seduce anybody he would probably just laugh awkwardly and think it’s some kind of joke. the great irony is that rooming with him has left you with many instances to confirm that he is attractive, but the defining moment is when you realize just how much yuuta has grown in his year abroad. your apartment is nice and relatively modern, but there are still some tight spaces. usually you and yuuta just giggle while shuffling around each other, but today, you feel like you’ve gotten between a rock and another rock because when did yuuta—your scrawny, awkward, endearing yuuta—gain fifty pounds of muscle? it’s a terrible moment for you to be squished between him and the tiny enclosure of your storage closet and even worse that he’s the one who apologies, and smiles, and carries on reaching for the spare napkins while you’re left with the filthy thoughts about your best friend. 

[saetoru]

Rich boy! gojo getting all pouty because some guy hits on you at an event he takes you to and now you have a 6 foot GIANT leaning all his weight over you as he whines about not getting attention

[ WOUNDED PRIDE ] GOJO SATORU.

“satoru, you’re still pouting,” you hum, poking his cheek as he huffs.

“‘m not,” gojo mumbles, bitterly turning his head away from you. you can hear geto’s amused chuckle from the distance, making your boyfriend growl out a shut up, suguru under his breath, and because you’re supportive, you hide your own laugh.

“baby, he’s gone,” you cup his cheeks, grinning as he stubbornly refuses to meet your eyes, “you don’t have to be jealous anymore.”

“jealous?” he pulls away from you like you’ve insulted him—like the idea is simply too crazy to hear out loud, “me? jealous? what gives you that idea?”

“toru,” you snort, “you couldn’t be anymore obvious.”

“neither could you,” he accuses, narrowing his eyes at you, “you were trying to make me mad.”

“i don’t know what you’re talking about,” you say with faux innocence, making his arms cross.

and now his lips are even further jutted in a pout, though you know saying something will only make him more upset, so you choose to keep your mouth shut for now. but gojo can still sense your amusement, glaring at you before turning his head away with a petulant hmph.

“flirting with other men is considered cheating, you know.”

“i wasn’t flirting,” you giggle, “i was just making friends. like you told me to.”

“making friends doesn’t include zenin naoya,” gojo glares at you, prompting out a supportive yeah, he sucks from geto. gojo nods, pointing a thumb at geto in agreement, making you roll your eyes.

“you never told me you hated him,” you defend, “but i wasn’t trying to make you mad,” you add softly, cupping his cheeks again.

“yeah you were,” he mumbles bitterly. his cheeks are squeezed together by your palms, and his voice is slightly whiny—and suddenly, you think you fall in love all over again.

“i’m sorry, toru,” you smile gently, “i just thought you looked cute all pouty. i didn’t wanna make you mad.”

“i wasn’t pouting,” he grumbles, “i don’t pout. i’m a man.”

“you cry during movies,” geto points out—and you’re glad there’s no wine in your vicinity, otherwise you think gojo might splash it on his best friend’s crisp, white button down. and you don’t think his father would take kindly to the scene—which would only further complicate things.

“i’m a man with a heart,” gojo scowls, “that’s why i’m not single.”

“okay,” you break up the bickering, distracting gojo with a kiss to his cheek—he grins at the gesture, giving you one in return even though he’s still slightly upset with you (though he won’t admit it.)

satoru gojo is not a jealous man.

that’s what he’ll tell you, at least—but you know better. you can see it in the way his lips alternate back and forth from a tiny pout to an irritated scowl, in the way his eyebrows furrow with irritation, in the way he huffs and tries to act like he doesn’t care when suguru elbows him in amusement.

and it’s not as though you enjoy attention from…whoever it was you were talking to (apparently zenin naoya according to gojo), but there’s just a small part of you that’s lightly amused. gojo is like a magnet—the girls flock to him left and right like a slice of bread left out for the crows to fight for. you’re used to it by now, have learned to ignore the slight creep of doubt and simply ignore the jealous glares sent your way as you take his hand.

but that doesn’t mean you don’t enjoy the change of pace every once in a while—the rare turn of tables that have him irritated instead of you.

naoya is a little too entitled for your taste. there’s too much expensive cologne sprayed on and you’re sure if he could without seeming tacky, he’d have left the tag on his suit to show its brand new. that’s the case with all rich people, you think, too busy watering the roots to pull for the weeds.

you don’t particularly enjoy talking to him—but you amuse yourself all the same. he’s far too cocky when he asks are you an intern for the gojo’s? i haven’t seen you before—

and before you can answer, you hear a familiar voice spit: actually, they’re my date. you don’t even hear gojo come up behind you, and you know as soon as his arm wraps around your waist, your stuck to his side for the rest of the night whether you like it or not.

“don’t talk to naoya he sucks,” gojo mutters. you nod, agreeing with him to console the bitterly wounded pride he seems to be sporting.

“he’s the worst,” you agree, “and his cologne smells gross.”

“i have that cologne,” he gasps, “it’s my favorite. you hate it?”

“no,” you say quickly, “it smells nice on you. everything smells nice on you.” geto snorts, and you shoot him a warning glance before he can make the situation worse.

gojo doesn’t look convinced—eyes narrowed and lips curled in that soft pout of his when he doesn’t get his way. it’s a bit spoiled, just a little bratty in its own right, but makes you melt all the same, pinching his cheek gently as you chuckle.

“if i were you,” geto turns to you, “i’d talk to naoya more. it might humble satoru just a little—”

“if i were you, i’d shut up before getting punched—”

“you wouldn’t land a punch on me if you tried—”

“you don’t know that—”

“actually i do because you can’t fight for shit—”

“i’m an excellent fighter—”

“alright,” you hiss, glancing at the few heads that have turned to watch the bickering between gojo and geto, making you glare at them in slight embarrassment.

“baby,” gojo whines, “tell him i can fight.”

and because his ego has been wounded one too many times tonight, you let him slump onto you, ignoring the heavy weight as you sigh and wrap your arms around him. you’re sure quite a few people are staring by now—but you suppose people always stare when you date someone like gojo.

“you could totally fight naoya,” you agree. you think you’ve finally said something right—because he seems to brighten at your words.

“i could, couldn’t i?”

“yes,” you nod, “and you smell better. and you have better hair.”

“and i’m cuter.”

“of course,” you sigh, eyeing geto for help. but he grins, sends you a small wave with mischief in his expression as he wanders off—leaving you all alone to nurse gojo’s ego back to full health.

© hanmas do not plagiarize, repost, translate to other sites, or recommend on platforms outside tumblr such as tik tok

[kalims]

— MALLEUS DRACONIA | pasilyo

or, sometimes you forget how many decades behind malleus is in slang. in comparison to lilia out of all people, he's like a very clueless innocent individual.

cw. very comical miscommunication (not the bad kind in romantic stuff heh)

wc. 1.4k

note. I can't stop thinking about malleus who really just doesn't get modern slang. this is a small treat ^^

can I get a 'heyy' from my fellow filo babes who know where the title is from

"no way," you gasp. "shut up!" a large smile encases your face, one that you try to contain with a futile cover of the mouth—malleus however jolts in confusion, his brows furrow in what it seems to be concern. he looks like a very confused, kicked puppy (or dragon?) overall.

out of expression, you slap his arm without a hint of aggression but he seems more bothered by your words than the.. hit that didn't seem to phase him at all.

malleus ponders deeply on what had gone wrong, and what he had said. you are laughing right now but your words sounded like you were upset (well not exactly your tone but your words itself,) he frowns, he feels very lost right now.

plus since you are his very special friend he despises you being upset. more so, him being the reason for it.

your laughing gradually decreases once you realizes that there's no one responding to you but the silence. a flicker of concern flashes in your eyes at malleus' very serious expression. "uh.. is something wrong..?" you ask nervously.

even though you're absolutely sure that he heard you malleus stays silent—tense as though he's being held hostage, looking more uncertain each passing second.

"hello?" you try.

you deflate. what is wrong with this man? where is the restart button? you cross your arms over your chest and raise a brow, at the still not speaking malleus.

at times you don't understand malleus and that's a given since even lilia had to go up to tell you that malleus was trying to impress you with fae customs but it's not like you knew that—and not that malleus knew the difference between culture of human and fae separately.

so yeah. there was no way you were gonna realize that the time malleus was trying to convince you to live in a tower with him was basically akin to a.. marriage of sorts? since married couples usually live in the same area, for fae it's the same.. or.. dragons? minus the ring and ceremony.

also apparently that was more important than an actual wedding ceremony?!

to others it was torture to watch you and malleus go back and forth—you trying to ask him out the normal, human way. and malleus trying to bound you to him eternally in the non-normal, fae way. you've lost count on how many times you heard sebek emit the most manly screech you've ever heard when he just so happens to stumble upon his lord..

doing.. courting rituals..

to you.

"M-MALLEUS-SAMA! HAS THIS HUMAN TRICKED YOU?!"

"WHY ARE YOU SHEATHING YOUR SWORD SEBEK—"

anyone could guess which scream belonged to who.

well whatever! point is tsunotaro seems to be unresponsive to you right now for some odd reason. have you done something wrong? (this is very ironic since malleus is also thinking the same.) all you did was slap his arm—oh my god did he get offended by that?

out of realization your eyes widen as your arms retract and hang by your sides uselessly. you look straight in his eyes and say; "I am so sorry," with furrowed brows and genuinely apologetic eyes malleus is struggling to keep up with your first request.

like that time he legit just stormed the diasomnia fridge, stole some poor student's tub of ice cream and high tailed it to your dorm because you were supposed to eat a cone yourself but was unable to due to the work load crowley had dumped you (honestly, what's new?)

so in a way it made you sad because damn was ice cream good. instead of it melting away your troubles it actually did melt instead.

because of some crow.

all just because he would go around the world for you if you asked.

(some cheesy part of you would imagine him going around you because how nice would it be if he saw you as his world? though if you did that to him instead and call him your world you reckon he'll take a few minutes of explaining before getting it.)

in the end malleus breaks. his will to oblige your request just fades in the back of his mind because he does not know why you're apologizing to him for no reason when clearly, he's the one that upset you! "my child of man.. you aren't the one at fault," he looks at you like he's sorry. "it is i,"

what.

now you're confused. "uh.. wait what?" didn't you just hit him? was he not mad about that even though your little slap probably didn't even make him feel anything? "didn't I just hit you?"

his face contorts into suprise. "oh really?" he mumbles. even though there's not much shock after you can tell he has no idea what you're talking about.

now you're even more confused! if he's not upset with that then what was he being all silent treatment about? malleus shrugs at you. "even so, I don't mind. you can hit me as many times as you'd like, I can take it," he says seriously.

you splutter. WHAT. you were literally just listening to him spill tea a couple minutes ago.. that sounds so wrong on many levels and you don't even wanna consider what he's saying because one, that's just weird! and two, sebek would literally strangle you.

and both you and malleus would not like you being strangled like that.

"what. just stop, please," you raise a hand and he immediately shuts up. "what are you talking about? you didn't do anything wrong." you deadpan.

this time he tilts his head. "you told me to shut up didn't you? so I merely did as you told—" he says casually. which baffles you all the more because this is starting to sound insane! did he actually take it literally.

malleus is so pure sometimes.

so pure that you can't help but stifle a giggle. and it takes you a couple of seconds of just containing your laughs to speak again. "i- pfft.. I was just joking," you manage to say in between laughs.

oh that was a joke? he should consult with lilia to tell him all about the current trendy jokes. "oh,"

you realize he probably didn't know what you were saying so you take it upon yourself to explain. "um.. it's like,, an expression of disbelief and uh.. amazement?" you explain. cringing at your horrible explanation, it just isn't your forte.

malleus still nods attentively. listening to every word you say. "I see, thank you. my child of man, I will make sure to utilize this new knowledge," he smiles at you in a way you just can't resist.

malleus is very endearing but..

that sounds.. kind of concerning.

ㅤ

and take it to play does he.

"malleus-sama, have you heard?" sebek chimes in with a certain glint in his eyes. lilia chuckles at the clear excitement of his dearest sun from the kitchen counter.

someone get him out of the kitchen.

malleus hums thoughtfully, should he get lilia to wrap the dinner for you as well? you must be hungry. "heard what?" he answers a moment later.

"the southern lights will shine upon briar valley this year. shan't we visit soon?!"

sebek is true though. if the southern lights really is going to shine upon briar valley then malleus would like to take you there. just so you could see the beauty of it. (and perhaps, he could spend more time relishing in the beauty of you and your existence.)

seeing it will be an experience for sure. though he's seen countless southern lights malleus looks forward to it this year.

plus.. his heart warms at the thought of his people being able to witness it.

a thought pops into his mind.

"shut up,"

malleus says it so monotonously, without any emotion whatsoever that silence stretches across the room in an uncomfortable fog, and if anyone listens closely they can hear crickets.

a cloud of shame washes over sebek's face as his mouth clamps shut. lilia pauses (saving himself from a deep cut because anyone can tell that he's cutting the carrots way too big.) and raises his brow.

"now malleus—,"

sebek bows repeatedly before bolting out of the room with a trail of stormy clouds following him comically.

"what was that all about? look at what you've done. you've upset sebek,"

that's what he thought with you as well. the things you've taught him is surely working right now, no?

ah yes.. next time you meet he should ask you about more of this strange languange.

note. MY FINGERS ARE SO TIREDD

not proofread

ko-fi

[chaniceroses]

Bad Boys Ride or Die (Armando x Reader) Part TWELVE

The ride over to McGrath’s took forever. He was a smart person to live away from the city and to be surrounded by nothing but woods and water. Which means that more than likely, he had cameras and heavy men guarding the area. Eventually you and the rest of the group made it near the abandoned building that he was hiding in. 

You could see McGrath panicking while walking back and forth, he was talking to someone and kept his eyes focused on one thing.

“What do you think is going on?”Armando asked, staying low to the ground.

You squinted your eyes to see if you could see anything else but nothing.

“I don’t know, he’s hella upset though. I can tell you that.”, Marcus responded, looking out of his binoculars. You shifted your eyes over to the water to notice a seaplane approaching the sand.

“Look!”, you whispered, pointing your finger over to the plane. You watched as everyone turned their attention to the plane and then back to McGrath to see him now walking outside onto the dock.

“We have to go!”, you continued, now standing up and pulling your gun out.

“What the hell are you doing? We have to do this responsibly if we all want to live.”, Rita whispered, signaling you to crotch back down.

“I don’t give a fuck Rita.”, you snapped back, checking your gun. You were getting sick of Rita and her bullshit.

“You should “give a fuck”, I’m your boss which means I have the last say.”, she replied, now standing up and facing you.

“ Excuse me but…last time I checked, you weren’t the one doing all of the work with proving Howard’s innocence. We were…”

“Rita, she has a point. We need to go now.”, Mike added, looking up at you and Rita. You watched as everyone stood up and turned to face the both of you.

“No, I will not allow my team to be killed, just because this is personal for you.”, she responded, standing in front of you. You would think because she was close to Howard, that this would be personal for her also. 

“You and these fucking rules.”, Armando added, walking over to you and softly pulling you behind him.

You turned your head to look at Mike to see him nodding his head towards the building, signaling you to go. You understood what he was saying so you walked from around Armando and started running towards the beach. You kept your attention on McGrath watching him walk down the long dock while holding on to Mike’s wife.

Once you reached the dock, you hid behind the big tin that was next to it. Trying to count the number of people that were coming out of the place.

“More than fifteen…”, you whispered, peeking around to see Callie crying. You could feel the adrenaline begin to rush throughout your body, that’s when you knew to go. So you sprinted out from behind the tin and started shooting, and ducking. Allowing the bullets to hit each person that you were aiming at. In response, you were being shot at. Bullets hitting the sand, dock, and different objects that were surrounding the place.

You watched as McGrath and some of his men ran inside while the rest stayed outside to fight. McGrath, running? Well that was a shocker. You turned to see Mike, Marcus, Kelly and Armando climbing onto the docks and shooting each person that were in their line of vision. They must’ve been following behind you, when you had removed yourself from cocky Rita to run towards the building.

“MIKE HE’S INSIDE!!”You yelled, sprinting up the twisted dock. That’s when you noticed a man running towards your direction. He was muscular, big and tall with a long black beard. You aimed your gun at him to shoot him until you realized that you were out of bullets.

“Shit…”, you whispered, throwing the gun and watching as the guy sprinted towards you at full speed.

You decided to match his energy and run towards him. Once you were close enough, you threw yourself onto the ground and punched him in the balls several times. Hoping that it would cause him to lean over in pain. You watched as he slowly turned around to look at you. Before you could throw another hit, you felt someone aggressively pull you back, making you fly onto the ground.

“Fuck…”, you mumbled, grabbing your hip. You looked up to see Armando climbing on top of the guy’s shoulder to then throw down his elbows violently until the guy’s body went limp. You watched as the guy laid there and then looked back at Armando to see him shoot the guy in the head to make sure that he was dead.

“I didn’t mean to throw you down like that baby!”, he yelled, running over to you and picking you up off the ground. He frantically began to check your face and body, turning you around to make sure that you weren’t hurt.

“I’m okay Armando.”, you smiled, creating space between the two of you. You couldn’t help but to be in awe of how he was treating you. You watched as he smiled back in response, then raised his arms out to you to allow you to lead the way. So you did.

ARMANDO POV

I followed her, allowing her to lead the way inside. Marcus and Mike had already killed those who had met us on the dock so I figured all we had to do was walk in and trap McGrath to get Callie and Mike’s wife. Until we started hearing gunshots, we ducked and hid behind a big stack of wood boxes that were blocking different doorways.

“I’m going to go after McGrath, that should be where Mike is.”, she informed, pulling out a gun from the back of her pants and taking off the safety lever. 

“I’ll try to get rid of the rest of these people.”, I responded looking at her. For a moment as we hid behind the boxes, it felt that it was just the both of us in the room. No violence, no voices, no one else. Just us. I watched as her eyes shifted from looking at me to looking behind me.  Before I could respond, y/n pulled my head into her chest and started shooting at whoever it was. I covered my ears, allowing her to finish what she was doing. Once she finished, she stood up and reached out her hand to help me up.

Grabbing it, I got up and turned to see two guys laying on the ground unresponsive. That was hot.

“I can come with you y/n, let me help you.”, I suggested, snatching the gun that was wrapped around my waistline. I watched as she just looked at me and then towards the direction that McGrath went. She had a look of uncertainty written across her face, which told me that she was against it. I didn’t need a response to know what she was going to say so I grabbed her face and gently kissed her on her lips, then on her forehead and then ran towards the shooting that was happening between Dorn and Kelly with McGrath’s men. 

Y/N POV

You watched as Armando ran off towards the sounds of guns going off after kissing you. Was that his way of maybe saying goodbye or expressing what he was going to say earlier. You shook your head to allow your thoughts to leave it and then ran after McGrath. The hallway was long and filled with windows that showed the ocean view. As you ran, you took a peek out the window and noticed something shiny hiding behind the bushes on the beach. You stopped to stare at it when suddenly, the window glasses around you started breaking. They were shooting at you. You started sprinting, trying to reach the end of the hallway before the bullets reached you. Each step that you took, it felt that the bullets were getting closer and closer.

You started noticing how close you were getting to the door at the end of the hallway so the only thing that was running through your head was to jump. Jump at the perfect time so that the bullets wouldn’t catch up to you and leave holes throughout your whole body. So you jumped, allowing your body to slam onto the ground. Until you felt a sharp pain on the side of your leg. Quickly sitting up against the wall  near the door, you dropped your gun and looked down to see an open gunshot wound in your leg.

“Ugh…fuck!”, you whimpered, holding on to your leg. You looked down the hallway to see if anyone was coming before putting your attention back to your leg. Your hands were shaking and you could feel tears building up in your eyes.

You knew that this operation wasn’t going to be easy but you were shocked at the fact that you were shot so quickly. That has never happened. You could hear loud groans and hard steps at the entrance of the hallway so you shifted your body and turned to see Armando and Callie standing there while looking at you.

“Are you shot?!”, Armando yelled, letting go of Callie’s hand and running towards you.

“Go back Armando!”, you screamed back, pointing towards Callie.

“No I’m not, you’re shot! I can’t—” “Fuck…Armando!”, you interrupted, pulling out your gun and pointing it at him. You watched as he stopped in his tracks, now standing in the middle of the hallway. He had a surprised look on his face. Not being able to grasp the fact that you were aiming a gun at him.

“Armando, go back or I'll kill you. I don’t want to but I'd rather have to shoot you and take your life myself then have someone else take it and you be dead because of me so go back and get her out of here, the both of you!”, you continued, aiming your gun at him. You didn’t want to put him at risk, you’re already shot and you guys had just gotten here. You watched as he took a step at you, testing your word. So you aimed your gun at the ground next to his foot, then shot it and then aimed it back at him.

“I don’t miss.”, you cried, using your other arm to leave your body off of the ground. You watched as worryness began to be written across his whole face. He kept looking back at you and then at Callie. You looked at him and noticed bruises and cuts across his face but you had to ignore it, ignore him. So you turned your back towards him and left out of the door. You were praying to yourself, hoping that he understood why you just did that. You wouldn’t dare hurt him however you just  wanted him gone and to be safe and you knew that you threatening him and leaving would let him know that you were serious.

Walking out the door, you were met by a flight of stairs that you didn’t see and ended up falling down it. Each step slapping you in the face as you went down. You laid there on the ground after the fall to catch your breath. Wondering how in the hell you didn’t see the stairs, when you noticed the glare in the bushes before getting shot at. Slowly lifting your body off the ground, you stood up to see two figures out in the distance. Squinting your eyes to adjust to the view, that’s when you realized it was McGrath, Christene, Marcus and Mike

You grabbed your gun that was on the ground and began to run. Ignoring the pain that’s running up and down your leg and the sweat that was slowly burning your eyes. Maybe it was the fact that you saw McGrath and how badly you wanted to see him dead or that you wanted all of this to be over so that you could have a regular life with Armando. You weren’t sure, all you knew is that he wasn’t surrounded, which means that you and Mike would have a chance to tear him into pieces. So, you allowed your mind to take control over your body as you ran, not allowing anything to stop you.

ARMANDO POV

“I need you to listen to me! I’m not here to hurt you, trust me!”, I yelled, firmly holding onto Callie’s shoulders. There was fear in her eyes, as if I was some monster. I can understand why, with me killing her grandfather however I had no choice. I was protecting my mother and what we had built. I let go of her shoulders and grabbed her hand, pulling her to force her to follow me. I wanted to quickly take her to safety so that I could come back and find y/n. I know that her pulling a gun on me meant absolutely nothing. She just wants me to be safe but what kind of man would I be, to allow my woman to be in danger while I run to a reliable and protected area? A man that’s a bitch, that’s what kind of man.

I must’ve gotten lost into my thoughts because suddenly I could hear Callie scream. Before I could respond, I felt a sharp object dug into the top of my shoulders. 

“UGH!!!”...I screamed out in pain, pushing Callie away from the man that was holding the knife into my shoulders. I could feel my upper body go numb, and my breath slow down. A cold substance was now creeping its way down my chest and back which began to make my arm go weak. Turning to the man that stabbed me, I began  punching him in his throat and then kicked him in his knee. I watched as he fell to the ground letting go of the knife in my shoulder that he was once holding. Yanking it out, and stabbing him in his throat, I watched as the life that he once had now slipped away from him. My head is spinning, I feel as though I am seeing two of everything. Trying to get up, I could feel the strength that I once had now leave my body, making me fall onto my hands and knees.

“Get up!!”Callie cried, tugging on me and looking around. “Please! We have to go, c'mon!” 

I could feel her lift one of my arms up so that I could lean on her for support. I was tired, and helpless. A tingling sensation was hugging my chest and my mouth began to feel dry. I knew that Callie was trying to help me but I didn’t want her to carry all of my weight.

“I got it, I can—”

“No you don’t, now let’s go.”, she interrupted me while holding on to my arm. I knew that I was heavy and could hear her struggling to hold me up. So I shifted my  weight to the opposite side of my body to ensure that I wouldn’t cause any pain to her body. Each step that I took felt like I was stepping on a cloud and I could feel my breathing slowly becoming short. Time felt like it was coming to an end and becoming impatient with me, as if it wasn’t waiting for me anymore while death was slowly popping up in my mind. I had many things running through it  but the only thing that stood out to me the most was making sure that y/n is safe.

Y/N POV

You were standing next to Mike while intensely staring at the devil. He had a gun pointed towards Christine while his other hand held on to Marcus.

“Marcus how in the hell did he get you?!”, Mike annoyingly yelled, clutching his gun tighter than before. You were wondering the same thing.

“The man is fast Mike, I didn’t see him.”, he shrugged, throwing his hands up in defense.

You watched as Mike shook his head in disappointment and then turned his  attention back to McGrath.

“You're looking good ... .healthy.”, McGrath sarcastically laughed while looking at you and then down at the wound. 

“Shit…are you okay y/n?”Mike asked, looking down at your leg.

“No seriously, that bullet may have hit an artery…you need to go.”, Marcus added, pointing at your leg. 

“I’m…i’m fine okay…McGrath, let them go..they’re not who you want.”, you responded, keeping your gun aimed at him.

“I’m not going to give them away that easy y/n, you know that.”, he smiled, pushing the gun closer to Christine’s head. You could hear her silent sobs, they were extremely low and she kept her face hidden for you and Mike to see.

“Shoot her, him or him. It’s your choice.”, he continued, looking at Christine, then at Marcus and then at Mike.

You lowered your gun in confusion, what the hell does he mean? You were lost and you could see Mike looking at you however you ignored his stare.

“McGrath what the fuck do you mean? Just take me.”

“I’m not going to make it that easy for you baby. I told you that you had a decision to make, the only person that is missing is Armando.”, he explained, tightening his grip on Marcus.  

You widen your eyes, recalling the night McGrath was in your home. Decisions? You thought he meant it in a different way not having to kill the people that you mostly care about. You looked over to the ocean and watched as the waves caressed each other when Armando came across your mind. When you last saw him, he was coming to try and help you; however now, you don’t know what condition he may be in. Maybe it was a good thing that he didn't follow you.

You looked at Mike, then at Marcus, and then at Christine. Trying to choose which person to shoot, although your mind was willing, your body wasn’t. Your hands began to tremble, you knew that if you decided not to shoot one of them, that they would most likely die regardless. Raising your gun, you pointed it at Christine.

“HELL NO! SHOOT ME Y/N!”Mike demanded, putting his gun down and pointing at his chest.

“SHUT THE FUCK UP MIKE!”You responded, pointing at him.

You understood Mike with every emotion that he was feeling at this moment. You were pointing a gun at his wife who had been missing for a couple days. Christine was now sobbing and Marcus was talking to himself about forgiveness.

“Ten…”, McGrath whispered, straightening his posture.

“Y/N!”Mike yelled.

“Y/n just think about it…he’s testing you, he’s not being serious.”, Marcus laughed trying to diffuse the situation.

“Nine…”

You looked at Marcus and then pointed your gun at him. You watched as he looked at you in pure shockness. Making him throw his hands up in defeat.

“Wait a damn minute, don’t shoot me. Shoot Mike!”, he yelled, pointing at him.

“MARCUS!”Mike and Christine shouted in unison.

“Eight…”

“WHAT? He said to shoot him instead…oh, so all of sudden y’all don’t remember?”

You stood there and listened as he counted down. Tears of frustration were coming out of your eyes and you could feel anger running through your hands as you held on tight to the gun. You turned your gun back to Christine and stared at McGrath.

“Fascinating choice.”, McGrath smiled, keeping the gun on her head.

“Y/N?!”Mike cried, looking at you. He had his gun back up while pointing it at McGrath.

“Forgive me guys.”, you whispered, looking at Mike then at Marcus and then Christine, You watched as Christine held her head down to avoid eye-contact with you while Mike kept trying to convince you to shoot him.

You closed your eyes to allow yourself to take in the smell of the ocean. You knew that no matter who you decided to shoot, that someone would be mad no matter what. So, you decided to go ahead and take the shot. Turning to Marcus, you shot him in his shoulder and then several times in the chest, watching as he fell forward onto the ground. There was silence. You held your gun up and watched as Mike looked at you astonishingly. 

“Marcus….”Mike sobbed, turning his attention back to him. He wasn’t moving, not an inch. You looked at Mike hopping that he would catch on, however not a thought was happening in his eyes. 

McGrath was now looking at you and then down at Marcus suspiciously. You didn’t know what he was thinking but you knew that he was probably catching on.

“Check him.”, McGrath demanded, while looking at Mike.

“What?”, you asked, looking at him and then back at Mike.

“Check. Him. Or she dies, right now. Your choice.”

You watched as Mike looked down at Marcus as he lay lifeless in horror. You couldn’t imagine being in his place having to check if your bestfriend is dead. Instant chills went through your body. Mike began walking towards Marcus and then bent down and gave him a slight shake.

“He’s not responding…”, Mike sighed, shaking Marcus. There was no response.

“Turn him around.”

“Are you fucking serious?”Mike responded looking up at McGrath and then at you.

You watched as Mike’s lip quivered, while he was looking at Marcus. You could tell that he was debating on whether or not to flip him but he knew that he had no choice.

“Fuck…”, Mike whispered, using one of his hands to scratch his back. You watched as his hand slightly pointed at another gun that he had attached to his belt. Quickly glancing at it, you looked back at McGrath to notice that his attention was still on Marcus. You kept your gaze on Marcus and watched as Mike slowly turned him around. That was when you knew that was your que. You ran towards Mike and watched as Marcus pulled out a gun from under him and shot at McGrath's hand. Making him drop the gun that was once aimed at Christine’s head. Grabbing the gun that was latched onto Mike’s belt, you began shooting at McGrath while walking towards him. 

You turned to Mike to see him already looking at you, giving you the greenlight. Turning back around, you stooped down to his level so that you could look at him. He was cursing you out, saying every word in the book. However you didn’t care.

“Fuck you! Do you hear me, FUCK YOU!!”, McGrath yelled, leaning over. 

You held his head up to force him to look at you. Allowing your hand to caress his cheek, you watched as his eyes slowly changed from hate to calmness. Exactly how you wanted it to. You allowed your head to be on top of his and looked intensely into his eyes.

“Fuck you too, you dirty bitch.”, you whispered, removing your head off of his and shooting him between his eyes.

You watched as he fell back into the water, completely lifeless. He was dead. McGrath, the man who's tried to kill you several times, was dead. The man who would have you changing identities all of the time, was dead. The man who killed the only little boy that you cared about, was finally dead. You stood up off of your knees and could feel the pain in your leg that you had been ignoring come back.

“Y/n…”, Marcus whispered.

You kept your focus on McGrath, for some odd reason…you didn’t feel any kind of relief. You took a step closer to his body and looked down at him. Observing as his hair moves with the water and as the blood slowly poured from the back of his head. You held up your gun and began shooting him again, holding on to the trigger to make sure that every bullet that was in the gun would come out.

“Y/N!”, Marcus yelled, now getting up off the ground. He walked over to you and gently grabbed your shoulder. “He’s dead…..You’re okay.”, he whispered, now putting his hand on top of the gun that you were holding.

You turned to look at him and then at Mike and Christine. Finally, the breath that you were holding the entire time had finally been released. You handed Marcus the gun and then embraced him with a hug.

“I’m sorry that I shot you Marcus.”, you apologized, patting him on the back.

You listened as he winced in pain, shit you had forgotten that you shot him in the shoulder.

“It’s okay y/n. You did what you had to do, I'm just happy I caught on to your plan and so did Mike.”, he laughed, turning to look at him.

You watched as Mike began to laugh, mimicking the tears that began to run down his face.

“Haha…at first I actually thought…I thought you killed him man.”, Mike sighed looking at you.

You turned to look at Marcus and then back at him. You could tell that Mike was actually being genuine and not joking around.

“Once I saw you kind of shift in the way you were standing, that’s when I knew that you had something underneath your sleeve.”, he continued, keeping his arms wrapped around Christine’s neck.

“Yeah, it was a tough decision but I'm glad that you guys caught on.”, you smiled, taking off your belt and wrapping it around your leg.

“We need to go back towards the truck and meet Armando.”, Mike commanded, turning around and pointing towards the trees.

“Shit..Armando!”, you yelled, looking at the group. “He has Callie and I told them to go towards safety but that was the last time I seen him and—-”

“Judy! Fuck we have to go find him, or she’s going to kill him y/n!”

“She doesn’t know we’re here Mike.”, you responded, looking at him confusingly.

“I’m sure she does y/n, she’s pretty good at hunting people down.”, Marcus sighed, patting you on the back. 

You shook your head in agreement and began to follow Mike and Marcus towards the woods. The pain in your leg was getting worse and you could feel yourself getting lightheaded however, you wanted to see Armando. To see that he was safe and okay.

ARMANDO POV

 “We have to…we have to stop here.” I stuttered, trying to keep up with Callie.

“No, we have to keep going just to—”

“STOP!” I yelled, walking over to one of the trees, to lean on. I watched as she stopped walking and turned to look at me, she had a worried look across her face. She began walking up to me and stared at me. I wasn’t sure what she was going to say, especially with her knowing who I am.

“Thank you, Armando. For protecting me.”, she whispered, while smiling at me. I responded with a smile and looked past her to see a mid-height white woman aiming a gun at me from a distance. It was Judy.

“Callie, move away!!”, she demanded, keeping her eyes on me.

I kept my eyes on her hoping that she wouldn’t pull the trigger. However with the kind of hatred that she has on her right now, the hope is very little. Callie turned around and stood in front of me. Basically, shielding me from the woman that was watching me like a hawk. Wow.

“Mom…put the gun down.”, she whispered, putting her hands up.

“Callie! Move! Listen to your mom, you don’t know who you’re trying to save.”

“No mom, you listen..He saved my life.”

I observed as Callie tried to convince her mom to spare me. Crazy world that we live in, I had killed her father and now she’s trying to kill me. Just for her own daughter to be against it. What comes around, comes back around I guess.

“JUDY!”Mike yelled, running towards me. 

“Thank you God.”, I thought to myself. Very odd for me to say but I was excited to see him, to see my dad. My dad? Has a good ring to it.  I watched as he pulled me up, allowing me to put all of my weight on him now this was more comfortable. Callie and Mike were in the middle of begging Judy to spare me when I noticed that y/n was nowhere to be found.

“Hey, where is she?” I asked, looking at Marcus. Observing as he responded with eyes, I followed where he was looking, to see y/n standing directly behind Judy. What the hell was she doing?

“Mom…he saved my life. Please, we need to help him.”

“Judy, listen to Callie, we can do this a different way.”

“Judy..put the gun down.”,  y/n demanded, while standing behind her. We watched as Judy’s face turned pale, her eyes shifted from Callie to Mike. 

“I’m not in the mood to kill anyone anymore however, if you kill him…I’ll kill you and then your husband. That way we can leave pretty Callie…parentless. And I know you wouldn’t want that because I don’t, so please listen to your daughter, he deserves a chance.”, y/n explained stepping from behind her while pointing at me. She was exhausted, and I could tell by the way she was trying to avoid putting weight on her leg that she was in pain.

“Judy…please.”, Mike whispered, putting his body in front of me. 

“Fuck…get out of my sight.”, she responded, throwing her gun down and throwing out her arms for Callie to embrace. I watched as Callie ran and hugged her. Y/n walked from behind her, picked up Judy’s gun and handed it to her.

“It was just a scare tactic Judy..I wouldn’t have dare.”, y/n sighed while looking at her.

“I know..”, she responded, looking up at her. I watched as they sent each other a small smile and then went back to their separate ways.

“Armando…you’re pale.”, y/n whispered, walking over to me.

“I know I was stabbed on the top of my…my shoulder.”

“We need to get him help, Mike, we need an ambulance!”, she panicked, turning her attention to Mike and then back at me. I hated seeing her like this, worried and scared. It felt good to have someone care about me the way she does, however, I don’t want it to be because I’m hurt.

I began to think about my life, all of the killings that I've done and always being on the run from people. I’m tired of that, I want to live a life of peace and y/n gives me peace. However, even though this is all over now, I'm still considered a fugitive. I’m still wanted and have chains on me even if I realistically have none on right now. I looked at Mike to see him looking at the small boat that was near us and then back at me.

“Help me.”, I sighed looking at Marcus and Mike. I watched as Marcus came over and helped Mike, with keeping my balance as I walked over to the boat. I knew that I’d need to use the majority of my energy on the water so using them will help conserve it.

“Armando..what? What are you doing?”, y/n asked, walking over to the boat. “You need help,you’ve been bleeding c’mon.”

“I have to go y/n, i’m sorry.”

“What do you mean, “you have to go”? We can help you, Armando. Mike can help us, right Mike?”, she continued, desperately looking at Mike for answers. Her eyes were slowly tearing up.

“Sweetheart…stop.”

“No, Armando! No…I’m not going to stop, are you fucking crazy? You’ve been bleeding for God knows how long and you have cuts across your chest. Please Mike….Marcus, help him.”, she cried now walking up to me.

I turned to look at Mike and Marcus to see them looking at y/n helplessly. I didn’t want to see her this way, but it was for the best. For the both of us.

“I mean…Armando we can—”

“No Marcus, don’t. Y/n this for the best, I know it is.”, I interrupted. I turned to look at Mike to see tears trying to form in his eyes. Once he realized it, he quickly turned around to avoid crying in front of me. Marcus walked up to the boat and looked at me, a million things went through his head but only four words came out of his mouth. “I love you nephew.”

I stood on the boat and shifted my glance towards y/n. She was looking at Mike hoping that he would speak up; however, there was no response.

“Come here, y/n.”, I sighed, looking at her. 

“Armando..why do you have to be difficult, huh? You’re pale, bleeding….fucking dying.”, she cried, walking over to me. She threw herself on to me and embraced me with a tight hug. Burying her head into my shoulder, although the pain was unbearable, the time that I was about to spend away from her was even worse.

I pulled her away from me and gently grabbed her face and softly kissed her lips. Her lips, y/n’s. One of a kind. 

“Listen…”, I whispered, taking off the small gold necklace that was around my neck and connecting it around y/n’s. I watched as she looked down at it and then at me. Her eyes were slightly pink and red from crying and I could see bruises on her face. I grabbed her hand and turned around so that the both of us could look out onto the body of water. I could hear sirens coming from the distance, so I knew that whatever I wanted to say…I needed to say it fast.

“I love you y/n…and I mean it. You completed me and you made me feel free inside and I want you to know that. I will be gone and I will miss you, even if it may be in death. No soul will ever compare to yours and if my time comes to an end today or whenever before I get to see you again.  I will wait for you on the other side…no matter how long it will be.”, I explained, trying to hold on to whatever strength that was still in my body.

“Oh Armando..”she wailed, covering her eyes with her other hand. I softly moved her hand and pointed towards the water.

“And even though you can’t swim…I’ll be in the waters, allowing you to feel my presence when you near it and to keep you safe if you decide to get in it y/n. So this isn’t a goodbye, it’s a see you later because time will forever be by our side, no matter what. I promise.”, I finished, lifting up my pinky finger. 

I watched as she shook her head in agreement and connected her finger with mind. I grabbed her to hug and to give her a kiss one more time, this time allowing my hand to caress her stomach.

“Armando…”, Marcus sniffled. “We will take care of her.” He had his lips sucked in and tears were slowly streaming down his face. 

“Yeah, I’ll make sure of that. You just make sure that you take care of yourself.” Mike added, walking over to me. He patted me gently on his chest and looked at me. Maybe trying to figure out something to say. I looked over to y/n to see her walking over to Marcus and then focused my gaze back at Mike.

“You know Mike you don’t have to—”

“I love you son.”Mike interrupted, putting his hand on my shoulder. I watched as he quickly switched to the other and then looked at me to make sure that I was okay. However, I was speechless. Hearing an “I love you” from my dad was something that I've been longing for, for years. Secretly praying to God that I would one day meet my father and have all of my unanswered questions answered. To have this cold heart and mindset that I have always had towards others,  be soft. Who knew that three special words coming from him would mean the world to me. 

I watched as he searched my eyes for answers while he nervously bit the inside of his cheek. I grabbed his hand and pulled him in for a hug. Instantly feeling healed. Instantly feeling the years of feeling worthless and not wanted by him, leave my body. I finally felt seen.

“I didn’t forget about my two promises, I will keep them.”, he whispered, patting me softly on his back.

I listened as he continued to talk to me about the past and everything that we discussed leading up to today. I understood every word and knew that he would keep it so I decided to pull away.

I watched as he turned around to walk towards Christine. His head was low and his body had defeat written all over it. I turned to look at Marcus and y/n to see Marcus looking at me while y/n head stayed buried into his chest. I looked back at Mike and said the words that the little boy in me couldn't wait to say.

“I love you too dad.”

Finally…. finally I was able to say it. Able to get those words off of my chest, to express how I've truly felt about him all this time. Even though anger, hatred and unforgiveness was blinding me. Crazy how when death knocks on the door, it brings people together.  He turned around and gave me a smile while tears ran down his cheeks.

Looking at everyone and seeing the way everyone was emotional, made me realize how important I actually was.  I sat down and grabbed the two paddles that were in the boat, using them to push myself out onto the water. After a couple pushes, I found myself further and further away from the group, allowing the water to do the work while I kept my eyes on y/n.. Although I was slowly drifting away from her, our spirits were reaching out to each other. As the boat became further away from them, I could feel my vision slowly become blurry and my heart begin to slow down. The world around me was gradually going silent and I didn’t want y/n to worry so I sat the paddle in the boat and raised my hand to wave so that she would know that I was okay.

Until I could feel my body go numb and the world around me go dark, my time had come to an end.

[asterrx]

Lee Jeno x Male Reader

warnings: idol boyfriend jeno,blowjob,unprotected sex,bathroom sex,roughsex,etc.

The night at the concert, you were in the crowd, like any other person, with your lightstick and a banner to support your boyfriend, Lee Jeno who is performing.

Nobody knows that you're in a relationship with the idol that is on the stage with his members right now, the concert was mind blowing, it went so well, all the members gave their all, but Renjun couldn't be there because he was in a hiatus. And when they performed 'Smoothie' Jeno suddenly took off his shirt, shocking the members and all the people there, his well toned abs and his biceos, his mucles were all so manly, nobody could take their eyes off him.

Even though he's very hot and sexy, you were sonehow feeling sad, and jealousy starts building up deep inside you. You couldn't think straight, everybody, literally everybody at the concert has seen your boyfriend shirtless, you feel like something that has always been yours have been taken away from you. Seeing your boyfriend shirtless on stage having fun while everyone is drooling over him somehow makes you angry.

And after that he act al cute and innocent later at the concert, knowing damn well what he did.

After the concert, Jeno texted you telling you to meet him backstage, but you just ignored his message which confused Jeno, and eventually he calls you on the phone, "Hi babe, I was texting you but you weren't replying, can you please check your message..." he says, you just said yes and checked the message.

Then, you went to the backstage as Jeno asked you to, the members were there, greeting you with warm smiles and you could tell behind their happy faces they were really tired, it was such a long show.

Jeno hugs you from behind and says,"Hi baby boy, I've missed you",he pecks your cheeks, and you just stood stilk, not even reacting. Jeno was a bit confused, he can tell from your face that you were upset. So, he tries to lighten your mood, he asks you about the show, whether you liked it or not and you just ignored him which made Jeno wonder what he did wrong.

At the drive home, you stayed silent while Jeno talked about the show, how good it feels to perform on stage, you just listened without giving him any response.

Wanting to gain your attention, he kissed your lips softly, you just pulled away and told him to focus on the road and keep on driving. He was a bit sad, not knowing what made you upset, "Do you want to get ice cream?" he asked to which you replied,"I'm not in the mood to eat ice-cream", Jeno is now feeling bad.

You finally reached your shared apartment and as soon as you ckosed the door, Jeno pinned you against the wall, "Why are you ignoring me?" he said, "I'm not",you replied, "You were having fun right?" you added, Jeno had no clue,a look of confusion on his face, you rolled your eyes and headed to the bathroom to take a shower.

You entered the shower and took off your clothes, standing completely naked in front of the mirror, now you turned on the shower, the water was warm, it was really relaxing. On the other side of the door, Jeno was pacing back and forth, wanting to apologise, he snuck in tye bathroom and suddenly hugs you from behind, "Baby, please stop ignoring me...I'm sorry", he said, but you rolled your eyes, "Can you please get out, I'm not done yet...you can come back when I'm done", you said.

This time Jeno had enough, he sighed, then he suddenly turned you around to face him, manhandling you and he just started kissing you roughly, the kiss was rough, it was intense. So intense that you could swnse all the frustrations he was facing. "I've had enough", he said, then you mentioned about what he did on stage, then Jeno's eyes widened, "All I did was trying my best, and now you're complaining, it's frustrating...", he said, then he pulled you back in for another kiss.

His clothes are all soaking wet now, he ripped his shirt off, still kisding you, the kiss was driving you insane, all you could think of was how hot he was on stage, with all hos sweat dripping down his body.

Now Jeno finally pulled away, then he pulled his boxers down, revealing his big hard cock which sprung up in an instand, he took your hand and let you stroke it slowly, precum dripping from the tip of his dick, you kneeled down licking his precum clean, his dick was a bit salty and musky since he was sweating so much from the concert.

You are now bobbing you head up and down his big cock, taking it balls deep, Jeno throwing his head back, rolling his eyes back, he felt so good, you look up at him with teary eyes, Jeno looked down at you, the sight was like the hottest thing for him, he always liked to see you face while you suck him off.

After several minutes Jeno pulled back and lifts you up, he bend you down as you held on the sink for support, Jeno then stroked his dick and placed himself on your entrance, he suddenly thrust, balls deep, making you scream, it feels like your hole is gonna tear, even though you had sex with Jeno countless times, you're never able to adjust to his size. Then he started moving, his pace was rough and hard, your moans filled the bathroom, Jeno grunts, your reflection on the mirror as he was fucking you was making him more excited, then he started moving even faster, making you scream in pleasure, Jeno always loved it when you moan. Most of the times, you act all tough but when Jeno's in control, you're just a little hopeless kitty.

Minutes passed and you jave switched to different positions, you felt you orgasm approaching, Jeno xan easily tell from how your breath becomes faster, then he grabbed your cock and placed his thumb on your tip, "Wait for me", he said, you moaned louder, Jeno's thrust are now faster and harder, he was also about to cum, "Cumming", he whispered, just then, he released your cock, you came on the bathroom floof as Jeno buried his seed deep inside your hole.

After that you took a shower together, after care is what Jeno is a about, he is a monster when it comes to sex, but he takes good care of you as if he didn't just toom your ability to walk.

Then you walked out of the bathroom, changed into comfy clothes and then cuddled on the bed. "I'm sorry baby", he said, "I did it just for you", he added, "I was just jealous, that everyone got to see my hot boyfriend shirtless",you replied, Jeno was smiling, your words turned him on again, you can tell from his face. He was now ready for a second round, he's got that stamina of a fucking beast, then you just pretended to be asleep, knowing what wilk happen if you didn't.

[sage-green-matcha]

KILL FOR YOU - ETHAN LANDRY 🔪

having a little fun with Ethan after your murder spree <3

MINORS DNI!

Content includes: Smut! P in V sex, blowjob, a bit of overstim! Mentions of blood, murder, gf!Reader, gf!Ethan

A/n: I love writing psychopath reader 💪

<3

<3

<3

It was off-putting, the way you hummed as you cleaned the pool of blood below you. Ethan paced back and forth as you scrubbed, trying to process what you had just done.

"Please stop spreading the blood" He left prints of red as he walked, making you have to clean up an even bigger mess.

"Sorry..." He felt his chest tighten as he listened to your calm words. It's like you had done this thousands of times before. You were so calm, so confident.

"You said you wanted me to help you with this, E" You mumbled, collecting more water into your bloody sponge.

"Do you regret it?" You asked so nicely, looking up at him with your soft, doughy eyes.

"No...I don't know" His eyebrows furrowed and you smiled, going back to cleaning.

"Richie is proud of you, you know that...right?"

To make Richie proud was all he ever wanted. Sure his father was some half-ass cop and he wanted to make him proud too. But to make Richie like him was all he ever wanted. He always looked up to him, and when he saw what he did in Woodsbooroe he knew he had to do the same.

You know, to carry the legacy.

But it wasn't him who killed the group of friends. It was you.

You knew Ethan's plan would let you experience some of your deepest desires.

The rush of killing was like no other. You felt your body get hot with each stab, every splash of blood that hit your face made you excited.

Ethan watched in horror, he thought he would enjoy watching his brother's murderers get killed. But it was the total opposite.

His skin crawled and he cringed each time the blade made contact with skin. He thought about telling you to stop, telling you he wanted to call off the plan. But it had fallen too deep, there was no going back.

"I know" he gulped and you watched as he slipped his shoes off, carefully to make sure you wouldn’t get upset.

He sat on the couch as you finished cleaning, resting his head back while trying to think.

Your eyes watched Ethan carefully, noticing how tense he was. Maybe it was because of the heavy bodies he had just dragged, or he was just stressed about what to do next.

Whatever it was, you knew you could help him.

You sat down on the sparkling wood floor. The one that was just covered in blood. But you didn't make that connection, you were too focused on Ethan.

You traced small circles on his knee, making Ethan look down at you with intimidation in his eyes.

He wasn't sure how to feel. You looked so cute, so innocent. But what you had just done made him question that.

"Talk to me" Your face was squished up against the soft cushion, your finger still moving up and down his leg.

He hesitated as he went to speak, opening his mouth before quickly closing it. "Was this the right thing to do?"

You batted your eyelashes. You were obviously annoyed. He had just had you kill 4 people...for nothing? But you didn't say that you didn't say anything. Instead, you comforted him.

"It was the best option, Ethan. The only option"

"I know, I'm just..." He bit down hard on his lip, scared to admit how he was feeling.

"I'm just confused, I thought if they were dead I would feel better...but I feel the same"

"Let me help you feel better"

The feeling in the room changed. The awkward tension became sexual and it flowed perfectly throughout the quiet room.

He wasn't sure if now was the time for something like this. But yet again, he would never say no to you. You were just trying to help him. And maybe this was just what he needed.

His cheeks were flushed pink as he nodded, giving you the green light.

Usually, you went slow with him. Giving him a handjob till you stuck his cum covered tip in your drooling mouth.

But this time you didn't have patience for any of that, and neither did Ethan.

You sat yourself between his legs, carefully undoing his belt before reaching into his boxers.

Ethan's heart raced, his tummy filled with butterflies as your hand wrapped around his warm cock.

You almost forgot how perfectly he fit in the palm of your hand, slowly pumping his hard shaft.

He shivered as you spit into your hand, a lewd moan falling from his mouth while you watched with amusement.

Precum leaked from his tip, matching the shiny spit on his cock. With every stroke you felt his veins engrave into your hand, memorizing them.

Ethan was so caught up in his own pleasure that he didn't notice you getting closer. When you paused he let out a small whimper, missing your touch.

But he wouldn't complain again, not when your lips were wrapped around him. Your tongue swirled on his tip, kissing and sucking with your entire mouth.

Ethan basically levitated, his hips twitching forward while his eyes were closed tightly.

He pushed himself deeper into your mouth, a small gag coming from your throat.

The sound made him reach for more, thrusting himself into your neck desperately.

"Shit y/n, fuckfuckfuck" Whimpers fell from your lips while tears escaped your eyes. He barely fluttered his eyes open to see you choking on his cock, the sight being one he had imagined hundreds of times before.

He felt a tight feeling in his stomach, his cock twitching in your mouth before you pulled away.

"Why...why'd you stop?" His chest rose up and down with each heavy breath. His eyebrows were furrowed, but his eyes were open just enough to see you unbutton your jeans.

You sat yourself on top of his lap, moving your panties to the side before sliding his length up and down your slit.

You shivered at the feeling, your juices mixing into each other.

Ethan placed his hand on your waist, holding back whimpers and moans while you held onto his cock.

It wasn't like Ethan to get impatient, he was always good for you. But he was desperate, pushing your hips down with a harsh motion.

You let out a small gasp, feeling his veiny cock fill you up. He stretched you out so well, making you hold onto his shoulders.

Before you moved you pushed yourself all the way down, taking every inch of him. You squeezed him tightly, whimpering at the feeling of your hole being fully stretched out.

Gently you rolled your hips, biting your lip to hide any noises. Ethan’s eyes were closed tightly, his mouth wide open while small moans fell from his lips.

The sound of skin slapping filled the room, your head falling onto his shoulder.

You could hear his muffled whines above you, his hands grabbing all over your thighs and ass.

“Shit, Eth. Making me feel so good” You could barely speak as you felt him inside of you, the feeling making you melt. You were never verbal during sex, but Ethan could get used to it.

He trusted his hips forward, his tip making contact with your G spot. Mumbled moans fell from your lips as sweat formed on your forehead.

“Y/n…” A quiet groan fell from his lips, stopped by your teeth digging into his clothed shoulder.

You pushed your hand under his shirt, running it on his toned chest. “Take it off”

You continued to bounce as he slipped it off, Ethan messily throwing it to the side.

Your nails scratched at his chest, your mumbled moans against his skin.

“M close” Ethan's grip got tighter, the pain from your nails shooting straight to his cock. “Cum in me”

All you wanted was to feel Ethan, to hold him close and make him feel better. You needed all of him.

He trembled at your words, his nails digging into your waist. Marks formed in your skin, deep and red but the pain felt so good.

Your face smushed against his chest as his legs started to shake. His cock twitched inside of you, the feeling of hot cum shooting into your pussy.

He tried to breathe but you were desperate for your release, overstimulating Ethan. Your legs began to shake and you melted into him once again, gasps falling messily out of your mouth.

You felt the tie in your stomach snap, legs still shaking as cum dripped out of your hole.

You pulled him into a messy kiss, running your hands through his hair. You weren’t one to express how you felt, but you needed to tell him. It overpowered everything that had just happened and you wanted him to know.

“I love you Eth, I’d kill for you again and again”

[sctumsempra]

going insane and i need to infodump about severus snape’s patronus being a doe for a second. i personally don’t think it changed, or lily necessarily influenced it- i think it’s always been a doe, casting the charm in dumbledore’s office was meant to show that he and lily were supposed to be viscerally aligned with each other and he knows he fucked it up and that’s why he’s spent almost two decades trying to atone for what he did. on a representative level, the doe symbolizes peace, protection, and innocence, and no three words could possibly represent severus snape more.

all he wants is peace: a peaceful life for himself, a peaceful world, a peaceful school. everything he’s ever done has been to create as much peace as possible. some of it can be considered misguided from a black and white moral standpoint, but it’s what created peace for himself. for example, aligning himself with the purist views of his housemates made him less of a target for bullying- he’s not a pure blood, and they’d know, and having powerful ambitious students on your side instead of alienating yourself from everyone means you have at least a semblance of protection from harm some of the time. he becomes a double agent for dumbledore to help bring about peace from voldemort’s reign. it might not have been peaceful for him per se, but it was still with the intention of peace in some form. he tries to give other people peace- he takes a vow with narcissa to protect her son because she’s crying and scared for him, and it gives her peace. he doesn’t throw draco under the bus to save his skin when voldemort accuses him of being the elder wands owner, giving draco and narcissa peace even if they weren’t aware. it’s either for himself, or for others.

he’s the most protective teacher at the school- would mcgonagall have thrown herself in front of three kids facing a wolfsbane-less werewolf? would flitwick take the burden of an unbreakable vow to protect draco malfoy from voldemort? would any of the DADA teachers have run towards the sound of a screaming woman? he consistently vows to protect everyone and everything he can. and, leading into his innocence, when he realizes he’s only been protecting harry for him to die, it breaks him.

he’s not necessarily innocent in that his hands are clean and he’s never done anything wrong in his life, but he’s innocent in that he’s naive. he trusted voldemort enough to be drawn into the death eaters, he trusted dumbledore enough to be manipulated into his bidding. it feels like he forgets that dumbledore screws him over constantly, dangles things in front of him and takes them away, makes crude assumptions, and has left him to fend for himself essentially their entire relationship. the times that dumbledore abandons him- physically, mentally, metaphorically- he gets very upset. like it’s new information to him that dumbledore treats him like shit. from an abuse perspective, he probably had to spend his childhood mentally erasing what his parents and home were like so he could feel safe and normal, so the constant ebb and flow/back and forth of his and dumbledore’s relationship is familiar to him. when dumbledore draws him back in with whatever method, he’s right back to behaving as dumbledore wants, doing what dumbledore wants, and believing what dumbledore believes. the times that he remembers that dumbledore doesn’t care that he let the guy who’s tried to kill him or assault go, or that dumbledore thinks he wants only lily saved because he desires her romantically or sexually, or that dumbledore has only been using harry and, by extension, him (as he’s been the one protecting harry) to play the long game of destroying voldemort are the times that he’s emotional in the books. he cries, he’s vulnerable, he raises his voice, he begs and he pleads and he defers. he doesn’t do that any other time, other than when he found harry watching his memories. he trusts and he forgives (or he forgets, or he feels safer pretending he doesn’t care what’s been done to him/how he’s been treated.) a doe is perfect for him. reducing it to something like tonk’s patronus being changed as soon as she’s in a relationship with lupin or that it’s only a doe because of lily evans completely erases his entire way of thinking and behaving and being.

also, in a self indulgent addendum, it’s a very feminine animal, and severus is consistently aligned with femininity. hermione calls the half-blood prince’s writing feminine. he wears his mother’s clothes as a child, and lupin encourages neville to dress his boggart as his grandmother. he’s quiet and docile and tries to be non-violent unless he’s pushed to his breaking point, and even then it’s screaming or crying or getting animated. he’s emotional and frequently painted as hysterical. he gets the “woman character treatment”: to the average viewer who doesn’t think about him long enough to understand otherwise, he only desires lily. the consensus is that he chases her, he only thinks about her in the context of attraction. the line about looking at her greedily is constantly understood to be lust, and not a desire for love or a desire for a peaceful relationship for once in his life (and a relationship that only ever seems to be platonic at that). he even backs off and all but disappears from her life when he’s asked to, while james (the one with the stag patronus, the classic triumphant male character) harasses her and pursues her and behaves in a way that makes his son decades later wonder if he forced lily into a relationship. he’s behaviorally aligned with what femininity in the eyes of misogyny is supposed to be. he keeps to himself, he’s quiet, he sacrifices every bit of himself for students and coworkers and superiors and expects nothing in return, he pushes his students to be the best they can. (i’d say nurtures with my whole chest, but as the narrative comes from harry, we can’t really be sure. in my view, his house won the house cup for several years in a row which was only interrupted by dumbledore awarding a fuck ton of points to his gryffindor prize pony, his classes are seen as high performing and advanced by even dolores umbridge of all people, he only tries to punish students albeit a bit violently after several attempts of getting them to understand why what they did was wrong, which seems to be pretty nurturing in comparison to what other teachers allow and do). whether he’s trans, or had been influenced more by eileen, or he was intended to be deeply complex and contradictory and that meant that he had to have these traits, or any other of the multitude of reasons for snape being an inherently feminine character, it’s there. his patronus wouldn’t be a stag, he wouldn’t be anything overbearing and he wouldn’t be anything aggressive. it doesn’t make sense with his soul and his personality and his life. the peaceful protective innocent/naive doe, however, does.

[ateezreactionsandscenarios]

Kinktober Day 27 - Size Kink

Pairing: Jeong Yunho x Reader

Genre: Smut

CW: Wall sex, size kink, praise.

Word Count: 2234

Summary: Yunho never really noticed the height difference between you two, he knew it was there but it never had an effect on him, until he sees you wearing one of his shirts.

Prompt List               MasterList           Kintktober 2022           Buy me a Coffee

“Hey guys who does this remind you of?” Seonghwa asks showing the image of a cartoon duo with a large height difference that was on his phone, everyone including yourself erupted into fits of laughter but you didn’t stop your eyes rolling at the joke that was clearly aimed at you and Yunho. You were used to the height jokes at this point and you kind of expected it to happen given their sense of humour and their love for teasing everyone, you could never get mad or upset over it, if anything it made you feel more welcomed among your boyfriend's friend group.

You will always remember the day Yunho introduced you to his friends, he told you to stay quiet as you both walked through the door and made sure you stayed hidden behind his back until he said so, which was an easy task due to your height difference. You'll always remember the way his friends cooed at you once you stepped out from behind Yunho, your tiny figure stood in comparison to his giant one, at a quick glance you looked like his baby sister or something and that was the first joke they went to. At the time it made you blush like crazy and made you feel a little embarrassed but as time went on and you got to know the group as a whole better you no longer felt the way you used to, now you were also teasing them about anything and everything and to top it off Yunho had even taught you how to master Wooyoung's laugh, while the others would keel over with laughter Wooyoung would shoot you dagger and make another joke about your small height.

"I bet you need a ladder to even kiss Yunho's chin." Wooyoung quips at you with an exaggerated pout. 

"Without a ladder you'd be lucky if you could reach his shins." Yunho stood to the side innocently, eyeing himself up and down as he pictured you being the height of his shin, but his attention was brought back to you when he realised you and Wooyoung had started to playfully slap each other spurting funny insults back and forth. 

“Ahhh, come here.” Yunho interjects wrapping an arm around your waist and lifting you off the floor pulling you away from his bandmate. 

“See he can even pick you up with one arm you’re that tiny.” Wooyoung cackles his witchy laugh. 

“That’s it I’m not done with you Jung Wooyoung!” You try desperately to scramble your way out of Yunho’s hold. 

“No, no, you’re done we can’t just go beating up people baby...even if it is Wooyoung we’re talking about.” 

“Hey!” Wooyoung screeches offended by the back handed comment. 

“Come on, you know you deserve it 99% of the time.” Wooyoung folds his arms over his chest sulking in defeat thinking over how many times he’d been beaten up by his bandmates for his mouth. 

“She’s still tiny.” He finishes before going off to find comfort in San. Seeing how the coast was clear Yunho set you back down on your feet but still keeping his arm around your waist just so if you decided to go after Wooyoung he’d be able to hold you back as soon as you moved a muscle.

The rest of the time you spent with the group went by as normal, having a quick bite to eat while they were still on break followed by you sitting on the couch at the back of the room flicking your attention between your phone and watching your boyfriend dance to the music that was blaring through the speakers. Even though you’d had a fun night you were relieved when you stepped through the door of your apartment with Yunho in tow, finally being able to have some time to yourselves.

With Yunho in the shower you took the short amount of time you had to sift through his clothes pulling out one of his favourite t-shirts and throwing it on. You looked down at the t-shirt that reached your knees, looking like a dress on you, and thought back to the jokes Wooyoung had made earlier. 

“Huh, guess I am tiny.” You giggled to yourself making your way to the kitchen. The sound of a low chuckle made you jump out of your skin almost spilling your drink everywhere. 

“Shit Yunho, what have I told you about creeping around the place.” You whine. 

“Aww I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” He cooed walking over to you and wrapping has arms around your waist. 

“Is this my favourite shirt?” He asks tilting his head as he played with the sleeve. 

“Hmm.” 

“What?” You ask watching as a small smirk grows on Yunho’s face as his eyes wander over you. 

“You know, I never really paid attention when the guys mentioned our height difference, but now I can see it, the way my shirt just hangs off you.” Yunho spoke softly, one hand wandering over you while the other traced gentle circles over the skin of your shoulder the collar had exposed. You could feel your heart start to race, for a moment you thought he’d even be able to hear the way it pounded in your chest. 

“So tiny.” You’d usually swat his arm for the comment but the way his fingertips danced over your skin and the sparkle in his eye darkened you could only give in to it all. 

Yunho’s lips met yours, full of hunger and need, he kissed you like his whole life depended on it pulling you as close to him as possible with a hand on the back of your neck and the other gripping your hip. the height difference made you struggle a little to meet his demands, you need to step back in order to keep your balance but with every step back you took he took one forward until your back hit the wall behind you. Hearing the little “Oomph” that came from you Yunho broke the kiss to check if you were okay but the sight of you looking so small caged between him and the wall sent all rational thinking out the window. 

“So small, you’re like a little doll.” The lust laced in his voice made heat pool at your core and the way he called you a doll just added to it. You rose to the tips of your toes in a desperate attempt to have his lips back on yours but you were only met with another low chuckle. 

“Wooyoung was right, I guess you do need a ladder to kiss me.”

“Shut the fuck up and kiss me.” You hissed. 

“Oh, big attitude for such a tiny girl.” You wanted to scowl at his jokes but the expression was changed before you could even make it, his fingers diving under the shirt to find your soaked core. 

“Is a kiss all you want tiny?” You didn’t even bother responding, head falling back against the wall as your eyes closed losing yourself in the way he ran his fingers over the wet patch of your underwear. He took that as a good enough sign of what you really wanted, removing his hand from you to place both hands on the back of your thighs hoisting you off the floor, the only thing keeping you from falling was the grip he had on your thighs and how his whole body pressed you against the wall stopping you from sliding away. 

Yunho wanted desperately to take his time with you, really rile you up to the point you’re snapping at him, he loved how you looked when you got frustrated, but the way you looked so small in his hold looked even better and it was turning him on more than he wanted it to. He made quick work of pulling his sweatpants down just enough to free himself and you couldn’t help but stare at him wide eyed watching how he held you in place with one arm with such ease. Moving your underwear to the side he lined himself up at your core but stopped just before he did anything else, looking you in the eye with a cautious look. 

“What’s wrong?”

“I usually prep you before hand but baby I can’t wait anymore, I’m just worried I’ll hurt you.” You swooned over how caring he was, the man was practically dying from lust yet he still cared. 

“I’ll be fine don’t worry about me.” He sighed a little not really believing what you said but he didn’t know how much longer he’d be able to cope so he had to take your word. 

“Promise me you’ll say something if anything is wrong, even if it’s something small?” Cupping his face you looked him dead in the eye. 

“I promise, just please fuck me.” He didn’t need to be told twice, easing himself into you he kept a sharp eye on your face looking for any warning signs. Halfway into you, you scrunched your nose a little as the slight pain from him stretching you out hit you and just from that small movement he stopped. 

“Are you okay?” You nod a little more eager than you planned to. 

“Please don’t stop.” Once again taking your word he carried on until he was fully sheathed inside you. The feeling of your walls wrapped around him was enough to take the edge off a bit, enough for him to let you have a moment to adjust.

With his forehead resting against yours you combed your fingers through his hair comforting him, telling him you were fine, but now it was you who was getting restless. You tried your best to roll your hips against his but to no avail, you just hoped your small movements were enough for him to get the hint. 

“Are you sure?” 

“More than anything.” He took his time to start with, slowly pulling out to then slowly slide back in, you could feel every vein in his cock glide against your walls, the sensation dragging small moans out of you. The pain was non existent at this point, all you felt was burning pleasure as Yunho slowly fucked into you. 

“Please...faster.” You could sense he was going to ask you again if you were sure so you shot him a look that answered the question before it even left his lips. His smirk growing again Yunho gradually picked up his pace until he had you pulling the hair at the top of his neck, head hanging down as your mouth hung open with silent moans. 

“My tiny girl, doing so well taking all of me like this.” Yunho growled into your ear. Everything in this moment had your head spinning, from the way Yunho rutted into you down to the way his fingers gripped into the flesh of your thighs, you were seeing stars already from how good you felt, it was like everything in your vision came to a blur, all except Yunho. 

You could feel your high was approaching and as much as you wanted to hold it back the way Yunho hit your sweet spot over and over and how he grazed over your clit with every thrust you knew it would be impossible, but by the way his breathing became heavier and his eyes screwed shut you could tell he was just as close as you were and you really couldn’t blame him, he was dying of need before he even did anything. Your hands gripped his shoulders, nails digging in as you awaited your orgasm to wash over you which soon came, ripping though you as you shakily cried out his name and tried to keep yourself upright not to flop your whole weight onto him. Your walls clamping down on his cock like a vice had Yunho’s movements stuttering, he was determined to help you ride out your own orgasm before getting to his own, even if it meant using everything he had to will it away for a moment or two. 

The blurriness in your vision cleared and you were left with the stunning view of Yunho, sweat beading on his forehead and his cheeks a beautiful shade of pink.  Your senses came around just in time for you to fully witness the low breathy moan that fell from his lips as his orgasm hit, his hips stuttering against yours as he tried his best to ride it out needing to savour the feeling before he got overly sensitive. It was like his body crumpled in on itself as he started to come down from his high, his head lazily resting on your shoulder as you could feel the warm breath of his pants fan over your skin. You kept him close to you during that time, stroking the hair at the back of his head as he started to come around.

“You okay down there?” You coo. A low grumble was all you could hear before Yunho brought his head back up. He places a small kiss on your nose before gently setting you back onto your feet but still keeping his arms wrapped around you. 

“If i get this reaction out of you every time I wear one of your shirts then I’ll just have to keep stealing them.” You joke making Yunho laugh. 

“I swear you’re going to be the death of me.”

Tag list:   @kpopcrossworlds​​ @kpopjust4u​​   @whatudowhennooneseesyou​​​   @8tinytings​​   @jenotation​​​ @grim-adventures58​​​  ​   @owjohny​​​   @ker1​​​   @hellomingi  @ate-ez  @steponmesannie​   @azeret98​​​   @queenwiinks​  @wubbster​​​ @eternalhongshine​  @sansluvr​  @tinkerbell460

[sashaisready]

Chapter Seventeen - We’re going on a little ride

Bucky Barnes Mob AU x Femme Reader

You're hard at work in Pepper's Bakery when notorious mob boss James 'Bucky' Barnes darkens your doorway one typical afternoon, and life is never the same again

18+ - see Masterlist for full list of warnings

Chapter 18

Series Masterlist

You saw the engine start up to leave and you broke into a sprint as you shot across the street before they could pull away (but made sure to check for traffic this time).

You whipped yourself in front of it, banging on the hood and yelling at the tinted windshield.

“Hey!! Hey! Come out right NOW” you practically screamed. “Get your chicken shit asses out here and talk to me”.

You knew you shouldn’t speak to the terrifying mob goons like that but any worries you had were drowned by your anger, and fear for Peter’s safety. Besides, you knew most of them by now.

The door zipped open and you were surprised to see Bucky of all people step out, flanked by Steve.

He watched you carefully as he emerged. He was in one of his suits but the jacket was gone, his white shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows. His vibranium arm glinted under the light of the street lamp.

“Don’t hit the car like that, Doll. The paintwork is very delicate”.

“Doing your own dirty work for a change, huh?” you spat.

Bucky chuckled as he stepped towards you. “You have a good night, Doll?” he asked, condescension dripping from him.

“Don’t fucking touch him” you spat as you pointed a warning finger at him and then to Steve. “He’s a good man. Don’t drag him into this”.

Bucky shrugged casually, shaking his head as if he had no idea what you were talking about.

“We wouldn’t hurt Mr. Quill, would we Steve?” Bucky said dubiously.

“Of course. Not our good friend, Peter” Steve replied in a monotone.

Your stomach lurched. Of course they had his full name. They probably already had his driving license and tax records on file.

“Bucky, please…” you pleaded.

He watched you attentively as you took a step towards him.

“We both just agreed to be just friends as neither of us felt a connection. Don’t hurt him. There’s nothing there” you explained calmly, trying to sound tougher than you felt.

Bucky smiled thinly. “I’m not a monster, Doll. I don’t just go around hurting people, despite what you may think. But I have to say, this is quite an impassioned defence of someone you’re ‘just friends’ with” he said sardonically, using finger quotes for your words.

Your panic gives way to anger again, his smug smirk a catalyst for your rage. The wine in your bloodstream certainly not helping your rational brain or negotiation skills in the moment.

“Well he is just my friend, alright? Not that I need to justify myself to you of all people...I don’t want him to get hurt because of me. I don’t know what sort of fucked up show you’re running here. I certainly can’t seem to get away from it, but I’ll be damned if I stand by and let innocent people get caught up in it too” you shout, practically spitting with rage.

Bucky sighs. “Doll…”

You raise a hand to silence him.

“No. You wanted to talk? Let’s talk. Steve, you can listen too if you want as James can’t seem to go ten feet without his guard dog. The fact is, I have no idea what your game is. I liked you a lot. Alright? I used to enjoy our little back and forth. Whatever it was. It was fun. And then we fucked and you treated me like a leper, cancelling our date and parading ANOTHER WOMAN in front of me days later at my own fucking workplace. Laughing at me. Watching me get upset and revelling in it. And then you send me eight million balloons and have your goons follow me. And I nearly get hit by a car trying to chase them off. And I meet a new guy. A nice guy who actually liked me who doesn’t treat me like a toy, or a cat playing with a mouse. And I can’t even enjoy that because I’m followed everywhere I go. And I tell you to leave me alone but you ignore me, just dig up information on my date and wait for me outside my house and have the gall to smirk at me like I’m crazy…”

You find yourself short of breath, the venom of your monologue catching you off guard. Your blood turns to ice as the reality of what you’ve said hits you, nervous he’ll lose it at you.

Bucky just stares back at you, unreadable as always. You briefly wonder if you’ve finally pushed him too far and you’re going to end up buried in the cement under a new apartment complex. Your stare snaps to Steve who also just returns your gaze, equally impenetrable. Bucky’s eyes briefly betray a slither of hurt too, and even though everything you’ve said is justified you can’t help but almost feel a pang of longing for him.

Bucky looks you up and down, your words ringing in his ears as guilt begins to overwhelm him.

“I’m sorry” he says forlornly.

You and Steve exchange a look of surprise. Neither of you saw that coming.

“I know I treated you badly after our night together, Doll. It was stupid. I lost my head a bit, thinking you weren’t into me. So I played a game, I thought it was going to be an extension of our banter and I misjudged it. And then I was too stubborn to apologise”.

He sounds quiet and subdued, a far cry from his usual self.

Your mouth falls open in surprise. “Oh…well. Thank-you. I appreciate that” you reply softly.

He approaches you and his hand glides into your hair, his fingers stroking the side of your head as he gazes at you. You find yourself letting him touch you, moving closer to him, entranced by his sea blue eyes as he continues.

“I’m sorry I’ve upset you. I genuinely didn’t mean to. I feel crazy around you, if I’m honest. Like I can’t keep my shit together. And it just feels like every time I try and fix it I just make it worse”.

You soften as you stroke his metal hand, intertwining your fingers with his. Your faces are so close together that you can make out every mole and freckle on his cheek.

“All you had to do was say that” you tell him softly.

Steve takes that cue to disappear back into the car, giving you both some privacy.

Bucky smiles, his flesh hand moving to your chin and caressing it softly.

“I think about our night all the time” he admits.

“Me too...” you admit, your eyes glazed with lust.

“I know I’ve got a lot of making up to do” he tells you, and you smile back at him.

“You really do” you smirk.

His lips crash into yours and you’re momentarily breathless as you allow yourself to be lost in the kiss. Every sensation from the last time comes flooding back as his tongue slips into your mouth and your fingers find their way into his hair. It’s so good. It’s perfect. It’s everything you want.

He pulls away briefly and rests his forehead against yours.

“Quill will be fine” he whispers. “He’s just going to get roughed up a tiny bit. Just to send a message. But he’ll be alright” he says soothingly.

You gasp, unable to comprehend his casual tone with the horror of what he's saying as you place your hands on his chest and shove him firmly away from you.

“What? Why?? He didn’t do anything!” You splutter furiously.

“I just need to be sure he understands that you’re just ‘friends’” he replies calmly. “And that my men see that he’s been dealt with. They know who you are to me. They can’t work for me with respect knowing I let another man take you out”.

You scoff, almost laughing at the ridiculousness of what he’s telling you.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” you practically scream at him. “I’m not like your fucking car that he scratched. We aren’t even together” you sneer, waving your fingers between the two of you.

Bucky shrugged. “Doesn’t matter. Messages need to be sent” he said coolly as his hands moved down to your hips. “Like I said, we’ll go easy on him, you don’t have to worry”.

You gasp in horror as you shake yourself away from his grip. Suddenly all of your rage and upset comes flooding back, the kiss long forgotten.

Every instinct tells you to flee. To get the hell out of there, away from this monster - away from the man who talks about beating people so casually that you’d think he was reciting a lunch order.

But you think of Peter. And he’s the most important person to think about right now so you can’t run. You couldn’t live with yourself if he got hurt. You need to make sure he’s safe. And to do that you need to speak Bucky’s language.

“Listen” you tell him firmly, your eyes blazing. “If anything happens to Peter. Anything at all. I will never speak to or acknowledge you again. And I mean that. I will quit the bakery and move my ass to a different state just to get away from you. You understand me?” you warn him. "Maybe even leave the east coast altogether".

He blinks at you, surprised by your outburst. You take his silence as your cue to continue.

“And I will spend the rest of my days trying to bringing your down. Police. Feds. Anyone. I mean it. I’ll just keep going until I find someone not in your pocket. You hear me?”

Your mouth is dry and you’re trembling but you’ve said it now. You just hope it’s enough, that it sticks.

After a beat of silence which seems to stretch on forever, he replies.

“You done?” Bucky questions, deadpan.

“Almost. Keep the fuck away from me, you fuckin’ sociopath” you snarl.

Bucky laughs. “Always the fiery one, aren’t you Doll? Alright. I won’t touch Quill. I promise. Scout’s honour. And I’ll leave you alone like you want. That’s no problem”.

You nod, surprised he acquiesced and expecting more of a fight.

He takes a step towards you and suddenly his eyes seem darker. You step away from him instinctively.

“But Doll, trust me when I say this…” he says with a quiet intensity which chills you. “If I ever hear that you’re going to the police about me...or the feds...I won’t be half as agreeable as I am right now”.

He cups your chin and squeezes your cheeks together in his metal hand as you feel your legs nearly give way from under you. His grip isn’t hard, but you feel the impact of his threat. He places a small kiss on your lips before releasing you and heading back to the car.

“I’m sorry we couldn’t make it work, Doll” he grins darkly.

The door slams and the car pulls away a second later. You’re left standing alone in the road, distant noises of the city gradually filling your ears as you catch your breath. You briefly fall to your knees, rubbing your fingers across the tarmac of the road in an attempt to ground yourself.

You finally stand again, exhaling. Peter is safe. You are safe. It will all be alright. You can make a new start. He won’t be bothering you now. You’ll be okay.

As you stumble towards your apartment you’re so worked up that you don’t even notice the scurrying footsteps emerging from behind you. Seconds later it all goes dark and you realise to your horror that someone has put a bag or a sack or something made of material over your head. The fibres scratch uncomfortably against your skin.

You try to scream but a firm hand clamps over your mouth and you find yourself pushed along by strong arms. You hear a car door opening as hushed voices chatter. You’re thrown inside a vehicle, crashing against the floor of either a van or a truck as you hear the echo of the engine rumbling beneath you. You try to scramble up onto your knees but someone grabs your hands, a zip tie is sealed around your wrists and suddenly you’re helpless. You desperately try to vault yourself up onto your knees again but a gruff voice you don’t recognise speaks and you stop in your tracks.

“Just stay right there, princess” the stranger tells you. “We’re going on a little ride. And you’re gonna wanna sit tight for it”.

You go to protest but feel something hard and metal pushes into the small of your back. Despite never feeling one before, you know immediately that it’s the barrel of a gun.

Finally you stay still as you feel your fear build, laying on the floor of the vehicle, waiting patiently for your next instruction.

*

Bucky’s head is in his hands as Steve drives them back to the house.

“Just had to double down on Quill, huh?” Steve asks, keeping his eyes on the road.

“Steve..” Bucky warns.

“Had her in the palm of your hand...after all this time and all that scheming…and you threw it away because you couldn’t resist a beating…”

“Steve…I swear to God…”

“Jussayin’. How can you literally be kissing her one moment and have her threatening to rat you out to the feds on you the next? That’s impressive”.

Bucky ignores Steve and sighs. He’s angry at you, fuming even – especially at your threat to rat him out. Not that you know a lot anyway, he has purposefully kept his world separate from you – but still, you’d been inside his home, you know nearly all of his men by name or at least by face. He was sure you still had at least some of the cash he’d given you, and it was possible a couple of the serial numbers could be linked to a job or two…

You didn’t have enough to take him down, not with his ironclad business fronts and hotshot lawyers – but you potentially had enough to make his life more difficult than he’d like.

But he knew Steve was right. He was so close to winning you round, and he blew it. He saw red when he’d seen you kissing Quill, lost his head for a second. This was how he dealt with things, it’s what he knew. Even if you and Quill had agreed to just be friends like you said, it had sent a barrel of rage through him that someone else had touched you. Had felt your lips against theirs.

Even though he knew it was all his own fault.

[thepaperpanda]

The Best Is Yet To Come || Lo’ak x fem!Metkayina reader

Summary: finally, Lo'ak opens up about his true feelings, not only about the Payakan situation, but also regarding you 💙

Warnings: none, pure fluff & Neteyam interrupting the confession of Lo'ak's feelings for the reader 😤

Word count: 2203

Author: Rouge

A/N: prior to reading, it’s important to know that: the reader is female Metkayina ✤  there is no particular feeling between Lo'ak & Tsireya - he’s more interested in the reader ✤ Neteyam’s into Tsireya ✤ you'll find a glossary underneath the fic

The reefs of Pandora were more than breathtaking. The reef amazed you with its diversity, with its wide range of different colors, as well as many types of creatures living there. Having been Metkayina, you have been taught to look beyond the mundane. Water was both life and death, so to immerse yourself in this very specific kind of relationship with it was indispensable.

It was not anticipated that newcomers would arrive, especially forest people, Omaticaya. With Tsireya's assignment to show the newcomers their new home, you also took part in this task. Truthfully, you were curious about this new family that was about to settle among Metkayina. As opposed to your clan - their hands were slimmer and less muscular; their tails had funny fur covering the tips, and they had thinner legs. There was no doubt in your mind that they would have difficulty adapting to your environment.

Nevertheless, within a few weeks, the Sully family made great progress - they learned to ride ilu and how to fish, and Jake Sully's youngest son even developed an unusual relationship with Payakan, a tulkun outcast.

_________________

Sunset came in its boldest blaze, as if Eywa had painted rainbow-flames across the evening sky. You were coated in a light mist of salty air from the ocean breeze, blowing gently towards the shore. Sitting on the sand with Tsireya and Lo'ak, who grew closer to the two of you, you watched the eclipse coming across the sky; throughout the area, beautiful turquoise and violet hues began to appear.

"The thought of Payakan choosing you still baffles me," Tsireya whispered to Lo'ak. 

With a single nod, you also glanced at the young Omaticaya. "Tsireya's right. It seems to me that Eywa has something great planned for you, Lo'ak."

As he listened to both of your words, young Omaticaya nodded his head occasionally; some of his braids moved back and forth as he did. "I still don't understand why your clan refuses to accept Payakan's innocence."

There was an exchange of glances between you and Tsireya.

Taking a moment to calm herself, Tsireyspoke. "Loak," she started gently, "You know he is the one responsible for those deaths, according to the Tulkun Way."

"It's unfair," he replied, shrugging within his arms as he traced shapes in the sand with one of his fingers.

As if to ease his anger and sorrow, she placed her palm on his shoulder and whispered, "This is how it is, Lo'ak."

After letting out a deep sigh, the young man got up. "Even though I understand, I find it highly unfair that he must pay for the rest of his life for fighting against sawtute." When Lo’ak had finished speaking, he walked along the shoreline alone, leaving you and Tsireya behind.

Tsireya looked after Lo’ak while he walked away. "He's so upset. I don't know how to cheer him up." 

You got up and dusted the sand crystals off your legs, saying "I'll try to speak with him once more."

Tsireya nodded in acknowledgement. "I think it's worth a try. Just remember to be gentle."

"I always am," you laughed and hugged your best friend before attempting to locate Lo'ak.

_________________

Not long afterwards, you spotted him petting his ilu while sitting on a wooden pier, almost outside the village. You watched him from a distance for a while. Tsireya was right - he was extremely upset over the situation with his spirit brother. As you were considering leaving him alone there so he could collect his thoughts and find his inner peace again, he spotted you out of the corner of his eye. He turned his head to you and laughed lightly, "Have you ever been told how bad you are at sneaking up on people?"

As you approached him, you spread your arms wide. "Too many times, actually," you replied with a shrug. As you sat beside him, you rubbed your hands together and put your legs in the water. "Lo'ak, listen, I know that..."

"I appreciate both you and Tsireya's efforts to comfort me, but..." He paused to rub his temple. "It's not that easy, I'm sure you understand my point of view."

While you gazed at Lo'ak's sadness written on his face, you said, "I understand, even though it might sound foolish. I truly understand how you feel."

A hollow look crossed his face as he watched the horizon, asking, "Do you really?"

“Sran, Lo’ak. Oel ngati kameie.”

Lo'ak looked directly at your face bathed in the last rays of the setting sun after he stopped petting his ilu's head. The way he stared at your huge eyes made it seem as if he was trying to glean every little sparkle from them. There was an obvious attempt to express a thought, but he could not find the appropriate words to do so, so he continued looking at your face, moving his gaze from your eyes to your cheekbones and lips. “Listen…”

With your palm raised, you signaled him to remain silent. While your palm rested on his chest, your eyes were never taken away from his. "Listen to me now, please. The tulkuns were violent creatures who fought among themselves for territory and revenge during the time of the First Songs, one of the earliest recollections of Na'vi history. This way of life was eventually abandoned by the tulkuns, who adopted a pacifistic philosophy in which killing is strictly forbidden, even if it is justified, as in self-defense cases. Thus, any tulkun who acts against the Tulkun Way and kills is outcast from the tulkuns. The tulkuns and my clan share a close relationship, as you might have heard, so any outcast tulkuns are rejected by us as well. It is nonetheless my strong belief that Payakan will have an opportunity to make amends, sooner nor later."

Lo'ak held his breath without even realizing it as his eyes widened. As you spoke in a reassuring tone, Lo'ak's heart calmed a little; the belief you had that Payakan could atone eased Lo'ak's soul as well. "Do you really think it would happen, Y/N?"

“Yes.” Lo'ak grew quiet as he thought once again about everything you had said. Having anxious thoughts was like riding an ikran around the village over and over again, faster and faster - it was more than pointless, so the young Omaticaya decided to push them out of his mind. In view of the beautiful eclipse that swept over the world, Lo'ak raised his head up, letting a quiet sigh out. "I strongly believe that Eywa knows... That Eywa knows he was innocent and tried to fight back after his mother and friends were killed."

Initially hesitantly, you took his five-finger palm in yours and squeezed it tightly, smiling at him. "Would you be kind enough to smile for me, Lo'ak? I don't like it... I mean, my clan don't like it when our guests are sad."

Observing your face as carefully as he could, he tilted his head to one side, considering your words. "Do they really worry about me or is it you who are concerned?" He mused.

Oh! There were moments when you wished you weren't so sensitive, that you could conceal your emotions more easily; within an instant, your cheeks were rosy and your hidden emotions were evident to everyone around. Those yellowish eyes of his were fixed on you; they were the most beautiful and understanding you've ever seen. “Lo’ak…” You started, but he touched your cheek, he rubbed his thumb against your skin, making you hold back your breath and nuzzle against his palm a tiny bit.

"Oeru lu fpom. I'm glad I met you. My family is so fortunate to have you and Tsireya as friends. You seem like such a sweet person," he complimented.

You whispered, "Oh, stop it" but his closeness had an unusual influence on you; your heart pounded as if you were being chased by akula, your skin was hot, and your pupils dilated. "I like you too, Lo'ak," you whispered back.

Suddenly Lo'ak leaned forward and gently placed his lips against yours, without a thought in his mind.

Initially, you blinked, surprised, but soon lost yourself in the sensation. Despite being messy and uncertain, his kiss was sweet and full of promises of a better tomorrow. During the kiss, you were at your most pure and vulnerable selves. There were a million loving thoughts condensed into one moment in that kiss. His lips tasted like the sweetest nectar you've ever tasted. Immediately after the kiss was broken, you looked into his eyes hesitantly, just like he did. “Lo’ak…”

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have kissed you," he apologized, gathering his composure as he rose from the pier.

"No, no, Lo'ak!" You blinked and got up as well, following him.

Lo'ak's ilu put his head over the surface of the water to observe the situation.

“I'm so sorry, I have no idea what I was guided by. I didn't want to sully your honor," he said, getting from the pier to the sandy beach.

"Lo'ak!" you yelled as you tried to stop him.

The young Omaticaya took no notice at all and tried to walk away as quickly as he could.

"Lo'ak te Suli Tsyeyk’itan!" You shouted after him.

It was only that that made him pause and look back at you.

As you approached him, you shook your head in disbelief. Observing him with your bluish eyes, you asked, "You kissed me and now you are running away? You, the one who survived meeting with Payakan alone? What is it that you are afraid of?”

As he avoided your gaze, Lo’ak whispered, "Rejection. Rejection is what I fear most."

You took a hold of his palms, squeezing them, fixing your eyes on his face. "Please, hear me out, Lo'ak. I need you to know that you matter. Not only to me, but to the fate of this planet. You need to acknowledge your worth. Be confident. Start feeling the difference you actually make," you reached out and touched his cheek lightly, your other hand was put to his chest. “As I told you before, oel ngati kameie. The confidence and certainty you feel about your own self is what I want to see from you, for I admire you, my dear. And about the kiss... Your belief that you sullied my honor is terribly misguided,” you chuckled lightly, blushing yet again.

"I thought you didn't like it," Lo'ak replied, licking his lips as they became so dry he could no longer bear the feeling.

"I've been kissed a few times before," you told him openly, "but none have been as heartwarming and perfect as yours." You could see the gratitude within the sparkles of joy in his eyes.

"Look at that! I didn't know my little bro is such a skilled kisser!" Suddenly, a vibrant tone came from behind, and you saw no one else but Neteyam, Lo'ak's older brother, approaching you.

Your anger about Neteyam destroying the moment full of trust and thrill made you grin at him a little too wryly. "Neteyam."

As Lo'ak asked, his tone was filled with anger, "What are you doing here?"

"What am I doing here? It's well after the eclipse, and mother is worried about you," the older brother explained with a shrug. “Come on, let’s get you back home.”

Upon seeing his brother's smug grin, Lo'ak rolled his eyes and requested, "Just give us a minute."

When Neteyam walked away into the substantial distance, Lo'ak focused on you again. "I was wondering if you would like to hang out tomorrow? We might go to Payakan.”

"I think I'll be able to join you if you help me with fishing and net weaving," you told him with a smile, but deep inside you were really more than thrilled by the thought of spending more time with Lo’ak.

"You got it!" He smiled eagerly, and kissed you again, harder this time.

The actions of Lo'ak had not gone unnoticed by Neteyam, who whistled a few times. "Well, well, look at you, kiddos! It might be a good idea for me to tell mother to start preparing for your wedding, bro. Love is in the air!”

"Lay off of him, Neteyam," you warned as you leaned closer to him, "Or I'll have to open up about what I saw a few days ago."

In an instant, Neteyam stopped grinning; his eyes narrowed, turning into tiny gaps. "Don't you dare, Y/N."

Lo'ak exclaimed, "Hey, I wanna know!"

A smirk danced around your lips as you looked hardly at Neteyam and said, "Your older brother was making out with Tsireya."

Lo'ak chuckled loudly and opened his eyes wider. "Knew it! I saw you staring at her. Look at you, bro, you aren't wasting your time."

After shaking his head and groaning loudly, Neteyam turned and walked away, gesturing at Lo'ak to follow.

Lo'ak kissed your cheek briefly. "See you tomorrow!" He bid you farewell as he chased after his brother, lining up with him shortly after.

While watching him leave, your heart raced within your chest. There was no doubt in your mind that the best was yet to come.

Glossary:

sawtute - humans (“sky people”)

tulkun - a large, intelligent marine creature native to the oceans of Pandora

ilu - a sea creature, the direhorse of the Pandoran oceans

sran - yes (colloquial)

oel ngati kameie - I see you

oeru lu fpom - I’m happy

akula - a Pandoran ocean animal

[lorelaisdiary]

Content warnings: reader is female and uses she/her pronouns, internalized misogyny, physical violence, abuse, manipulation, gaslighting, mentions of starvation, and child neglect.

Johnny Cade x Female! Reader - Sinners

Summary: You were stuck in a very religious household and were raised to believe that bad things would happen if you didn’t follow the rules set for you perfectly. When you meet Johnny Cade, an innocent boy who just wants what’s best for you, he shows you what affection and love is when given in a healthy dosage and not used in a detrimental way. When you finally open up to him about your family, Johnny decides he wants to get you out before something bad happens to you.

Author’s note: I’m so sorry that this took so long!! I’ve been experimenting and rewriting this to fix everything. I’ve also been going back and forth between multiple of my stories so I don’t burn myself out! I do genuinely wonder what churches and all were like back then. I know there was a LOT of cults back then which was what originally inspired this. I will be coming back to proofread this/fix any dialogue that doesn’t make much sense for Johnny. Also, please give constructive criticism!:)

Word count: 5.2K+

You were on your knees, murmuring a quick prayer. You didn’t want to be outcasted or damned for missing even one prayer and that was something that was beat into you as a child. You kept your hands clasped tightly together as you heard snickering coming from behind you.

You ignored it, knowing it was those boys that had come in randomly during the sermon. You stopped yourself from thinking anything bad about the people laughing. God told you that it wasn’t your place to judge and you trusted him. You wouldn’t judge the boys no matter how many cruel words they spoke.

You felt the tears before they even started to try and fall. You had stood up from the altar and wiped the tears away quickly, hoping no one saw you. The fear of being seen crying wasn’t too strong as everyone already called you overly sensitive so it didn’t matter much if they saw you crying. You went to sit back beside your family, who were all smiling at you as if you had done some good deed by praying.

In your eyes, that was the least of your good deeds. Why didn’t any of the other times get noticed? It wasn’t like it mattered that they didn’t because you weren’t supposed to be praised for doing the bare minimum but it was still upsetting.

A woman sitting beside you smiled down at you and nodded with no actual reason. Well, you thought she was saying hello without speaking. That’s how the people in your class said hello without ever speaking. You found it entertaining but never acted how they did because it was unladylike in every way.

You smiled at the woman and looked back to the preacher who was getting louder by the second. You crossed your arms as you licked your dry lips.

You would do anything to get out of the church but God wouldn’t appreciate you hating his love the way you were. You closed your eyes and looked down towards the ground as you began rapidly praying. Begging for forgiveness that you knew wouldn’t come easily, you felt your heart release the heaviness of your sins. You wouldn’t tell a soul of your true sins. The ones that keep you up late into the night; the ones that make you miss the days you would smoke cigarettes to calm yourself.

You heard the sermon slowly come to an end and you stood up without much thought as you walked into the aisle. Your parents followed you as you walked out of the church without speaking to anyone. Your mom followed you as she let out a sigh. “Your father needs to speak with the pastor so he said we could head on home.” She smiled as she placed a hand on your shoulder. “I don’t know about you, but I’m starving!” She started leading you away from the church as you looked over your shoulder. A group of teenage boys had walked out of the building with one specifically watching you walk away.

Your eyes looked towards a random tree after making eye contact with the adorable boy. You thought he was handsome but you felt a certain disgust for feeling that. You were going to marry a man of your father’s choice. After all, he knew what men were like and would choose based on which man could provide for you and your future family.

Your mom pressed a kiss to your forehead as she held you tightly against her. “Do you want to start exercising more?” Your mom suddenly questioned aloud as she ran a hand through your hair. “I think we should go on more walks and get out of the house more. You’re homeschooled and have nothing else to do and I usually have our home cleaned with food on the table long before it’s needed.” She rambled on and on as you stopped.

Your house was in front of the two of you as you grabbed your mom’s hand from your shoulder and began leading her up the concrete pathway that paved the path you needed to take.

Your stomach growled angrily as you felt hunger pains spread throughout your stomach. When was the last time you ate? You couldn’t remember as you felt you still didn’t deserve to eat. You took a moment to look around your house. Your mom was trying to redecorate as much as possible for Easter. You were feeling disappointment that winter had almost ended and it was soon to be summer.

You enjoyed bundling up in the warmest of clothes while also having reason to light a fire in the fireplace. You felt your face flush as you looked in the mirror that was hung in the living room and noticed that the strap of your bra had slipped down your shoulder. Your mom watched as you pulled it up with a struggle.

“You know, you don’t have to panic when it’s just me. I have breasts, too.” You looked at her with the widest of eyes she’d or anyone had ever seen on you.

“Mom! It’s immodest to ever allow anyone to see anything that only a husband should see!” You snapped as you ran up to your room in fear of being seen as a… you couldn’t bring yourself to think the word.

You collapsed on your bed as sobs filled the empty space beside you. You were ashamed, hurt, sad. You couldn’t understand the emotions that flowed endlessly through your body.

You grabbed the comforter from the end of your bed and brought it up closer to you as you flipped and turned every which way to get comfortable. You grabbed the stuffed animal that laid beside you and hugged it close to you. You were tired and you didn’t want to be involved with anything else for that day. You had gone to church and you had prayed to God to get you out.

You closed your eyes as you slowly drifted off to sleep.

You grabbed the piece of toast off of your plate and licked your lips at the buttery taste. You were going to the library soon to find the second to the last book in a fantasy series that you had picked up.

You grabbed your purse and started to walk out of your house with a tired sigh leaving you. You wanted more sleep but you also wanted more time to yourself. Your dad had come home with another man. He told you the man was a pastor from a nearby church that wanted to talk about God with your family.

You walked down the broken sidewalk with a frown plastered on your family. You were nervous to be out in public without one of your parents with you as they told you a lot of bad people liked to prey on young girls such as yourself. It made you nervous to even look out the window some days with the things they told you.

You sped up as the wind blew a little harder against you. You were wearing a long dress that covered everything including your ankles while also covering your arms and shoulders. The dress was wildly blowing with the wind and for a good while, you thought you were going to fly away with the fallen leaves on the ground.

The buildings around you had gotten more abundant as you seen the library in the distance. You heard that same loud laughing that you heard whilst in the church which made you do a double take at the group of boys walking down the sidewalk.

Your eyes met with that of the boy who had puppy eyes. He was attractive but you forced yourself to look away from him as it was disgusting for you to feel attracted in any way to anyone until you were married. You crossed your arms and covered your breasts as you knew that your body was created to be distracting for men. You never wanted to tempt someone.

You happily pulled open the glass door to the library and walked in, feeling a sense of safety when you heard the door shut loudly behind you. You never enjoyed entering buildings. It was… terrifying for you.

You needed to find another book that would keep your thoughts solely on yourself and the characters. Your Bible had kept you pretty focused on living your life based on God but you couldn’t continue to read the same sentences over and over while pretending to completely understand the meaning.

Your eyes scanned the dozens of thick books that were laying with a layer of dust covering them. You grabbed one that had a slightly darker cover than the rest, reading the title before flipping the book over to read the back.

You heard the library door open and close loudly. You looked towards the noise and almost let out a gasp once you saw the boy with the puppy eyes. He was making eye contact with you.

You looked back down at the book that you were holding so tightly that your knuckles were white.

You watched as the boy approached you after a second, finally deciding to speak after a moment. “Uh… hey. I’m Johnny.” The boy finally sent you a shy little smile and you looked down.

“I’m R/n.” You stuck your hand out and the two of you shook hands. You were honestly shocked that he had even followed you into the library to talk to you. You felt your cheeks flush at the thought of him finding you so pretty that he wanted to talk to you.

“I saw you the other day at church and now you’re here…” Johnny’s voice sent something throughout you as he moved a hand to rub the back of his neck.

“Oh, well I appreciate you approaching me but I only date to marry. If that is why you approached me.” You lied through your teeth and it made you feel bad. You weren’t allowed to date. Your parents only wanted you to marry a nice man who would do whatever so long as it meant that you were out of their house by eighteen.

“Oh…?” Johnny sounded confused as he looked up at you. You were wearing your heels and were standing only a few inches taller than he was.

“I don’t mind! Really. I- can we just be friends?” Johnny felt his stomach continue to wrap itself in loops as he broke eye contact and began staring uncomfortably at the ground.

“Yes. I would like that.” You gripped the book in your hand as you began walking to the librarian’s desk. She took your book from your hand and before you knew it, the book was slid across the desk back to you.

Johnny continued walking with you even when his friends started calling him over. You looked at Johnny with the smallest of smiles, “you can go hang out with them, if you want. My parents are strict and wouldn’t appreciate me being around a boy without them.” Your words confused Johnny as he knew parents could be protective but why were yours wanting to be around for every little moment? You were almost an adult woman and you still heavily relied on your family which, don’t get Johnny wrong, wasn’t a bad thing but it also wasn’t healthy.

“Okay. When can I see you again?” Johnny wanted to ask you out on a date but knew you’d reject him given the opportunity which you had.

“Well, I do want to go shopping soon so if you want to come then?” You tilted your head to the left slightly, eyes staring back at Johnny’s with a certain glint in them.

“Yeah, that works.” Johnny murmured as he stared at you as if you had hung the stars in the sky.

“Well, meet me at the Summit tomorrow at twelve.” You smiled as Johnny nodded before he began walking back towards his friends.

You stared helplessly after him, feeling as if you were doing the wrong thing by allowing him to walk off like that.

You let out a sign and continued your adventure home.

“R/n? Are you done?” Your father peeked into your room to ask if you were done reading the Bible. You felt that you were as you had memorized almost every verse you were given. It was mind boggling how you could remember such complex things but forgot simple things such as how to cook a chicken breast. Maybe that’s why your parents cared so much about finding you a husband. You were still excited about the prospects of receiving love and giving it back to someone but that excitement had died down a lot since you’d seen Johnny that day at the library.

“Yes, sir.” You responded as you looked out the window. Rain was clinging to the glass as if it was its life force. You found it fascinating how the drops would hit the window and stick only for them to slowly slide down. It was a cycle that was endless and so fun to watch. Your father left you alone as you heard the thumping of his shoes on the stairs. You tried to ignore the feeling of random sadness that you had started to feel. New emotions were appearing now that you had the slightest taste of freedom.

You were excited, nervous, sad, happy, etc. all because of a boy that you would never ever get to be with in any capacity. You looked at your clock on the wall and stood up, deciding it would be better for you to go get a snack and then take a short cat nap after just to get some of your energy back.

You let out a sigh as you walked down the stairs and came face-to-chest with your father.

“What’s wrong, R/n?” He lifted a hand up only for you to walk past him quickly. You were nervous. You didn’t want to speak to your father as he would only make those feelings intensify. You sat down at the kitchen table with a frown appearing on your features.

Your mom looked at you with the smallest of smiles playing at her lips. Your plate was already made and placed down in front of you. You didn’t immediately start to eat as your father came into the kitchen and sat down at the head of the table. Your eyes watched his every move, a certain anger filling you as you watched your parents turn to each other and began a conversation.

Why did they get to do whatever they wanted, even when it counted as a sin, yet when you do something, you're deemed a demon. A sinner who will never see the pearly gates of heaven. Your mouth stayed sealed as you felt the anger dissipate into thin air as guilt overtook every other emotion. Those were your parents. They never sinned even when you believed they did because you were uneducated and you didn’t understand the Bible as much as they did.

“I met a boy today.” You finally spoke, deciding to tell your parents the truth. God would want you to tell them the full, honest truth.

Your mom leaned forward with a smile on her face, “oh, tell me about him! Is he a God fearing man? Does he understand that you aren’t willing to be intimate until marriage? What about the church's rules? Does he know them?” Your stomach twisted at your mom’s words. You closed your eyes before starting to slowly answer all of her questions.

“He is. He goes to church. I did tell him that and he was okay with it. I haven’t mentioned the rules yet.” You whispered out as you sat up a bit straighter.

Your mom had a look of excitement on her face as she started talking while your father leaned back in his chair. “You’ll have to speak with brother David.” You hated calling everyone your brother and sister. It was unfair and disgusting when people began marrying each other within the church. You thought you were all brothers and sisters. You shuddered but nodded finally.

“Okay, but I never said that I wanted to be with him.” You responded as you picked your fork up and scooped some of the mashed potatoes up onto your fork. They were creamy and perfect. You continued shoveling the food into your mouth while your mom talked to your father.

“Our daughter is growing up. Next thing we know, she’s going to be in the hospital delivering our first grandchild.” Your stomach cramped with the pain of imaginary childbirth. That pain soon drifted to your lower body as you crossed your legs with the pain finally disappearing as you stopped thinking about it.

You would hold off on giving birth for as long as you possibly could.

“She won’t be doing anything until she speaks to brother David.” Your father reiterated what he had said before and you leaned back into your chair. Well, you at least had your mom’s permission to find a lover. You also remembered the numerous conversations where he had told you that he would choose a husband for you, because you weren’t smart enough to pick a good man.

You finished the food on your plate and stood up from the table as you decided you would wash your own plate. You didn’t want to stay at the dinner table any longer than you already had. That was a waste of time in your opinion.

You let out a sigh and walked to the kitchen, scraping the leftover food off of your plate before setting the plate and fork on the countertop and turning the sink on. You loved playing within the soapy bubbles that always spread rapidly once the soap was added. It smelt good and made you feel good. It made you feel clean.

You grabbed the sponge off of the holder that kept it out of the sink. You added a little soap to it before setting the plate into the sink and washing it. By the time you were finished, you had wanted to go to sleep. You grabbed the towel that you and your mom normally used to dry the dishes and quickly wiped the water off.

You opened the cabinet and you slid the plate into its normal place. “Hey, R/n? How much do you want for your allowance?” Your mom yelled to you and you wiped your hands onto your floral dress as you quickly started to walk towards your mom. Your heels clicked on the floor of your home as you caught sight of your parents who were still sitting in the kitchen.

“I don’t mind but I do really want that (favorite colored) dress that has (favorite design) on it.” You looked at your mom before your father pulled his wallet out and pulled a few dollars out. It was more than enough for you to buy the dress.

“Thank you, father.” You wrapped your arms around your father excitedly. You couldn’t remember a time where you felt so happy about receiving money. Usually, you would argue some and hope that they kept whatever money it was that they were trying to give. When it came to the man who had a helping hand in your creation, you didn’t care much. You enjoyed taking money from him and reminding him of your existence otherwise, he wouldn’t remember you past being at church.

You started making your way back to your room, hoping that you could meet that Johnny boy again. Hopefully he would be willing to meet up with you again so you could talk further than you anxiously speaking words that shouldn’t have ever been spoken in the same sentence. You wished you wouldn’t have lied and told him that you date to marry.

You needed human interaction to survive. You loved being with some of your close friends while doing anything at all. You couldn’t care less what the interaction you had was so long as you weren’t alone.

You started walking back up onto the stairs as you thought about how you could get into contact with Johnny once more. You made it to the top of the stairs and your eyes landed on the cross that hung above the staircase. You smiled as you murmured the lightest of prayers, and went back up to your room to pick an outfit out for your day out tomorrow. You wanted to impress Johnny and make him see you in a light that made you seem almost innocent. Men only wanted innocent and modest women.

You picked out a dress that had long sleeves and went down to the floor. You would wear your heels and it would make the dress reach close to your ankles. You set the dress onto the chair in the corner of your room.

You changed into a more comfortable outside before brushing your teeth and hair.

Soon after, you were in your bed and whispering prayers to God, hoping he would bless you with the prospects of love.

You were up and eating breakfast with your stomach twisting into knots. Your mom didn’t mention the slight shake of your hands and she didn’t mention how you were dressed up with makeup and all. She didn’t want him to realize and keep you home instead of letting you go out with your friend.

“Thank you for the money.” You grabbed the orange juice and took a sip from it as your mom looked at you with a smile. Your father had a slight smile but he it didn’t reach his eyes.

You were quick to leave your house, knowing you would be an hour or so early for whatever was going to happen with Johnny. You wiped your hands onto your dress and started walking slowly. You could take the time to admire your surroundings instead of trying to book it to meet up with Johnny.

He would probably be late anyways as all of the men you knew were rarely on time without a woman forcing them to get up and out of the door before a specific time. You meant no harm to Johnny but he didn’t seem like the kind of man to have someone doing that for him.

More often than not, he had dirt on his face and always seemed dirty. You would fix that, of course. You made sure to pack a small jar of water along with a handkerchief to make sure that he would get clean.

You looked around at the trees with a small smile on your face. Animals were casually running around and happily avoiding you as if their lives depended on it. Though, in hindsight, you were technically a danger to the animals mostly because humans killed them so often.

You noticed the Summit was quickly approaching within your line of vision and you quickened your pace so you could sit somewhere and wait for Johnny.

You entered the building and a shocked expression overtook your features as you tilted your head. Johnny was sitting on one of the benches and was pulling at something in his pocket. “Johnny?” You smiled as you realized he was early without you even having to ask him.

Johnny stood up and held a hand out for you as you gave him a grin. “I didn’t want to be late so I left a little earlier…” Johnny’s voice held that southern accent that made you smile. You had lived in the south your entire life but for majority of it, you lived in Utah so your accents were slightly different.

“That’s why I came early, too. Well, come on! We need to get into the shops before everyone else gets in.” You noticed the dirt had been wiped away but the grease in his hair was prevalent still.

You didn’t mind though as the two of you started walking together. “I… I’m sorry if I came off as overbearing last time. I never meant to come off like that.” You whispered out as you walked a little quicker just in case he didn’t react well to your words.

“You didn’t. I just wasn’t ready for it.” Johnny caught up with you and gave you the shyest smile you had ever seen.

“Oh… okay.” You pulled open the glass door, a smile present on your face as you walked into the building. You held the door open for Johnny with a grin on your face. You seen him pause for a moment before he walked into the store you wanted to go in. His eyes shifted from dress to dress without much thought behind his eyes.

“Oh, they still have it!” You smiled as you rushed to grab the dress that you originally wanted. You held the dress up and gave Johnny the most innocent smile he had ever seen in his life.

You skimmed through the sizes and chose yours, holding the dress under your arm as you waved an employee down. “Hi! I was wondering if you could let me into one of the dressing rooms?” You asked with a shy smile on your face.

The woman immediately nodded as the two of you began walking towards the dressing rooms. You peaked over your shoulder and saw Johnny was slowly following too. You would need to make sure he didn’t feel awkward after showing him the dress.

“My sister loves this dress. She actually cut the sleeves off because she thought it looked cuter and it really does!” The employee smiled at you and your eyes sparkled.

“Oh, that’s wonderful! I may have to do that before the summer months hit.” You laughed as the woman opened the dressing room door. She closed it after you and you looked at yourself in the mirror.

You were gorgeous.

You slipped out of the dress you were in and slid into the other dress with a smile on your face. The dress was beautiful on you and really made you look ten times better than you ever thought you would look. You always assumed the very worst of anything especially when it came to clothes.

You opened the door of the dressing room and gave Johnny a small smile as you showed him your dress. “I think it looks pretty on me. What about you?” You asked softly as you turned slightly to show him the back of the dress even though it was the same as the other countless dresses you had.

“It looks very beautiful on you.” Johnny gave you a small, breathless smile as he looked you up and down. You walked over to him and wrapped your arms around his shoulders, hugging him as you decided you wanted to give him physical affection.

It wasn’t unnatural for you to want to give people hugs as that was your love language. You slowly let go of the man and went back into the dressing room with a smile on your face. You kissed Johnny’s cheek with the softest smile on your face. You let go of Johnny completely and backed away with your lipstick stains stuck on Johnny’s face.

You walked back into the dressing room and changed back into your other dress as you quickly wanted to make it back to Johnny on the other side of the door. “Hey, Johnny? Can you come in here?” You weren’t going to be undressed in front of Johnny as you had a shirt underneath the dress because you thought of every situation, including having Johnny help you.

Johnny slowly opened the door of the dressing room and came in before closing it with his foot. “What do you need help with?” Johnny asked quietly as he kept his eyes to the ground.

“Can you zip the dress up?” You turned around and smiled as you felt his hand make contact with the shirt on your back. You heard and felt the zipper get pulled up.

You turned around and you both exited the dressing room only for you to see one of your friends from the church standing in line. You grabbed Johnny’s hand and quickly scampered away from the dressing room so she wouldn’t tell your parents that the two of you were alone in the dressing room together.

You let go of Johnny’s hand and you both stood together in the line to pay. Now, you only wanted to get out of the store and the Summit in fear of your parents finding out that you were with a boy. Your parents knew that you had gone out with a man but they didn’t know who it was and you wanted to keep it that way. You didn’t want them to unnecessarily judge him for being less fortunate than your family.

“I was thinking that we could get something to eat afterwards?” You looked at Johnny with the biggest smile on your face.

“Yeah, if that’s what you want.” Johnny mumbled out as he kept his stare at the floor. You were slightly upset that he was so shy but then again, it still made you feel happy/giddy to know that he even wanted to spend time with you, anyways.

“That is what I want and I’ll pay for anything you want.” You smiled as the cashier suddenly caught your attention. You set your dress down on the counter and paid before leaving with Johnny.

You wanted to go to one of the higher end diners that you knew of but Johnny didn’t seem comfortable with the idea so you let him choose a place. He settled on a place that was in a rougher spot in town but nothing the two of you couldn’t get through. You knew that you would get something that would be easy on the stomach so that when you got home, you would also be able to eat supper with your family.

Johnny was standing in front of you with the door to the diner held open. You smiled at him as you felt a yawn creeping up from the back of your throat. You were so tired but knew that you had gotten enough sleep so being tired didn’t make much sense. “Oh, I’m so excited. I’ve never been here before.” You made a comment before realizing that could be taken in a different way. How would the upper middle class/wealthy girl ever end up in the bad part of town with everyone else? She wouldn’t unless she was with someone who knew the bad part of town.

You sat down at a booth and Johnny followed before you started talking. You were rambling on and on. Johnny allowed you to do so and didn’t bother to add anything into the conversation besides the occasional “yeah” or “okay”. You sheepishly smiled at him after rambling and he finally spoke, “do you want something to eat?” Johnny didn’t have a lot of money and he never thought he’d be in a situation where he would need it to make a girl feel like he genuinely likes her.

“Yeah but I’ll pay! I have more than enough money for the both of us. If you want, I can slip the money to you so you don’t feel embarrassed.” You gave Johnny a genuine smile as you leaned back against the booth seat. You grabbed the money from within your purse and nodded at Johnny to grab it from under the table. You didn’t want others to shame him even more for “making” the girl pay.

You cared deeply about societal norms and everything that came with it but you also knew that you wanted to have a lover before you became old and barren. You didn’t want to lose your ability to have children before you even had a chance to have a lover.

You watched as Johnny took the money from you with a frown on his face. You grabbed two menus from the holder on the back of the table and handed one to him. “Oh, I want a salad.” You smiled at Johnny with your cheeks turning a light shade of red. You didn’t want him to see you as anything other than an attractive woman. Anything else would be considered unfair to you as you always worked and tried to present yourself as a respectable and honest young woman.

“I want a hamburger…” Johnny’s voice had gotten more confident and you were proud of that. It must’ve meant that he was comfortable around you.

You nodded at him before speaking, “oh, I enjoy hamburgers but I love myself a nice salad.” You looked down at your stomach and Johnny watched as you subconsciously sunk down into the booth at the sight of your own stomach. You forced the frown off of your face and looked back up at Johnny.

“You know, I would love to go to the library soon. If you’d like, you can come with me…” you were nervous. You had never asked a man to go on a second date with you. That was when the realization hit you that this most likely wasn’t a date and he considered the two of you only friends. You played with your fingers under the table and cursed yourself slightly as you understood that caused it.

You let out a sigh as your thoughts started making you second guess everything. You liked Johnny but you felt almost as if you were using him. You decided then that you wanted to spend more time with Johnny.

You finally end wrapped your arms around yourself. You smiled at Johnny to make him less worried. You had noticed how his face fell slightly when you wrapped your arms around yourself and you felt guilty for being selfish. Everything was so awkward now that the two of you were alone with one another.

Soon enough, a waitress had stopped by y’all’s table to take your orders and you both gave your orders before you looked back at Johnny. “I’m sorry if this is awkward. I’ve tried to make everything less awkward but I feel like I’ve made it worse.” You laughed quietly and apologized softly.

You never wanted to make him uncomfortable and you felt that you had. “You didn’t! You… come off as a little strong but that’s fine.” You heard Johnny speak up, this time louder than any time before.

You leaned back in the seat and let out a sigh, knowing that you were going to go home and cry.

You were laying in bed with tears rolling down your cheeks. Your parents knew that you were out with Johnny and they knew that he had come into the dressing room with you. You were forced into your room and told that you wouldn’t be allowed to eat for a week and after that, you wouldn’t be allowed to see Johnny again.

You were glad that you ate before you came home and you knew that your mom would slip you snacks through the door when your father wasn’t looking. You were ashamed as you knew that everything you done was wrong. You not only hurt your parents but you angered God.

You had turned your back on the only thing that loved you for you. You felt yourself choke back another sob as you stared at the ceiling with tears rolling down your face. You grabbed a pillow and covered your face as you got off your bed. Your father was yelling downstairs and you knew the way to get your punishment over quickly.

You opened the door to your room and began walking down the stairs, understand that you would be in plenty of pain by the time it was all over. You understood that you deserved what your father was going to do to you and you were terrified. You didn’t want to be hurt but you also understood that you had to be hurt in one way or another.

It was the only way to receive God’s forgiveness for your sins.

Your feet hit the bottom of the stairs and you walked into the living room, looking at your parents. Your mom’s eyes widened and she immediately told you to go back to your room. You were sobbing again and your mom tried to reach you only for your father to physically throw her onto the couch.

Your father grabbed you by your shoulder and began forcing you towards the basement. It would only take five minutes, right? That was the usual time it took for you to finish all the punishments. You were silent throughout the ordeal as you knew that nothing you said would do anything. He would tell you to shut your mouth and you’d be punished longer than you would had you just kept your mouth shut.

You were forced onto the ground on top of a tarp-like surface that would catch any liquids that would fall during the interaction that was about to take place.

You didn’t want to fight back much as you had once before and your nose had been broken for it. You were embarrassed to admit that you stopped fighting back after that. On top of that though, God wouldn’t want you to fight back. He would want you to take whatever was given to you with grace.

You heard everything before you felt the physical pain from what you assumed to be your father’s belt.

You were close to sobbing by the third hit but your reminded yourself that you needed food. You could take quite a few hits before your body gave out but to go without eating for a week, it wasn’t something you wanted to do.

Soon enough, your father had left the basement and left you on the ground with tears in your eyes. You would never do this to your future children. Not even in the name of God.

It was too painful for you to even breath that second so why would you ever do something so heinous to someone else especially when it hurt you. You let out a silent sob as you slowly lifted yourself off of the floor. You looked at the ground and noticed the dark liquid that had formed from what happened. You gritted your teeth and began walking up the stairs, tears welling in your eyes as you struggled to walk up the stairs.

You opened the basement door and let out a choked sound before you almost slipped. You groaned as you weakly made your way to your room.

You almost let out a yell as you saw Johnny sitting on your bed with his eyes widening the second he saw you. “What happened to you?” He stood up and you closed your door quickly and slid your dresser in front of it.

You almost gave out as you covered your mouth to silence your scream. You sat down on your bed and shut your eyes tightly. Johnny put a hand on your thigh and gently tapped it as he watched your face change from one to pain to one of fear. “This is a sin.” You hissed out between clenched teeth.

“It’s not. You’re not a sinner because I touch you.” Johnny wrapped his arms around you and you let out another choked sob as you began to take your clothes off in front of Johnny.

“Help me…” your voice cracked as you begged him for help. You didn’t want to be physically hurt anymore. You couldn’t do it. “My father done this because we were in the dressing room together.” Johnny watched as you finished taking off your dress. You had since taken off the shirt underneath and Johnny was both in awe and disgust at the wounds. He’d never seen wounds so deep in a woman.

Johnny got up and begin searching your room, finding tape and an old shirt that seemed dirty. Johnny ripped the shirt and began gently tapping your wounds with it. “I’ll get you out of here. I fuckin’ promise to get you out of here.” He gave you a look of pure anger as you let out a whimper when he hit one of the wounds just right.

“Why do you got tape?” You whispered out as you tried to focus on anything and everything other than the fact that the boy you just got beat over was holding tape and cleaning your wounds.

“It’s nothin’. What’s your favorite book?” Johnny asked as he finished up with whatever he was doing.

You were already talking, hoping that you could somehow forget about the pain that came from each and every touch on your back.

“Edgar Allan Poe is my favorite author and I can’t choose between all of his books but I’d say The Raven is the best of them all.” You whispered out through gritted teeth. You finally felt Johnny gently pull your shirt down. You heard someone walking up the stairs and you immediately pushed Johnny into your closet.

Someone tried to open your door but was abruptly stopped by the dresser in front of it. “R/n? Baby, are you okay?” Your mom’s voice came through the door but you looked down at the ground.

“You said you’d talk to him about the no food thing.” Your voice cracked as you moved to sit down on your bed. You were… tired. That wasn’t the exact word for what you were feeling but it was oddly similar to what you were feeling. You thought that you wouldn’t ever grow tired of living the life that you were given but you had. The bruises were always painful and he never said sorry for all the physical and mental/emotional pain he caused both you and your mom.

Your mom had no reason to stay with him and she had no reason to fear him. She came from a wealthy family which is how your family even managed to stay in such an expensive house. Your father, a bank teller, didn’t make much and wouldn’t have been able to afford the home you lived in without your grandpa.

Your mom walked away from your room, the quietest of sobs leaving your mom. You felt terrible and felt like you were being too harsh on your poor mom. Your father “disciplined” her as well though her punishments were usually worse than yours and if she ever stood up against him for you, he would beat her until she was near death.

Johnny wanted to say something, anything but he couldn’t physically bring himself to speak. It was an awful feeling for the two of you as you sat silently in your room. You finally looked over at Johnny with a weird look on your face. “How did you get into my room?” Your voice sounded rough around the edges, breaking with every other word.

“I climbed the tree?” Johnny looked at you with a small blush coating his cheeks. You looked out your window and looked at the tree, looking back over at Johnny right after.

“I… didn’t know that was possible.” You heard Johnny stop all movement and you decided that you wanted to get sleep but you didn’t want to be alone. “I know we don’t really know each other but can you stay for a bit? My father won’t bother me for a few days and my mom will come by tomorrow afternoon.” You whispered out as you looked over at Johnny. Your nerves were absolutely on fire as you waited for his answer.

“Yeah, I can.” Johnny got off the bed and turned your light off after you asked him to stay, seeing the tiredness in your eyes. You blindly laid down on your bed and reached to grab the blanket on your bed. You were far too tired to fight with anything or anyone. You just wanted to get a few hours of sleep without being interrupted.

“I’m going to go to sleep. You can stay up and do whatever just be a little quiet because my parents will try to come in if you make too much noise.” You closed your eyes as you silently mumbled a prayer. You couldn’t clasp your hands together or get down on your knees as the pain was far too intense for you to move much.

All the adrenaline you had had disappeared by the time you settled back down into your bedroom. Johnny paused in front of you and your bed with hesitation creeping up. He didn’t want to get in bed with you in fear of you pulling away from him.

You moved over slowly and patted the bed beside you, understanding his fear of not wanting to be in bed with you. You felt the bed dip as he got in beside you and you wrapped your arms around one of your pillows and brought it down to your stomach.

You curled around it and closed your eyes as tightly as you could. Your parents wouldn’t come back to your room well into the next day and you were okay with that as you knew your mom would most likely try to make things “right” by bribing you with food or something else she knew you would enjoy.

Your father would only give you a dirty look, making sure you knew he and the men at the church all knew of your sins. Your mom would never gossip because she said that was one of the easiest sins to commit. Your father, on the other hand, loved to tell the other men about how he punished you. You had heard him go into detail about it and it made you feel upset.

Your cheeks was stained with the tears you shed earlier. You were slightly embarrassed to admit that you still cried over the things that happened. You were always told that you would grow out of being sensitive but with every passing day and birthday, you realized you wouldn’t. You still cried over the smallest of things and you couldn’t control the tears once they started. You felt that it wasn’t the biggest issue that you could have and yet, everyone else felt the opposite. They treated you differently based solely on the fact that you were a tad bit more sensitive than they were.

Your blanket was rapidly warming up as you kept it pinned tightly around you, feeling only the slightest bit of guilt for Johnny when you felt his body release a small shake. “Are you cold? Get under here with me.” You moved over and held the blanket up for Johnny to get in with you. You didn’t want to wait for very long so when he moved slower than you wanted, you blindly reached a hand out and pulled him into your bed with you.

His body hit your bed with a thump and you smiled as you turned to face the wall. You didn’t want to bother him or make him feel uncomfortable so you pushed yourself against the wall with an almost silent hiss as your back made full contact with something. You turned onto your stomach and closed your eyes with your body relaxing. You weren’t tired, not really but you needed more sleep especially after what happened.

“I’ll get you out of here. I swear to it.” Johnny whispered out from behind you into the silence of your bedroom.

You laughed quietly as you shook your head. “You can’t and that’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with what’s happening. This is God’s plan.” You shifted and let your foot slip out from under the blanket that shielded you from the outside world.

“This ain’t God’s plan. Man, if God wanted you to be hurt, wouldn’t he just do it himself?” Johnny asked you with a frown on his face. You couldn’t see it but you knew he wasn’t happy with you or the situation.

“I don’t know. God has people on Earth and he uses them to punish.” You responded only for Johnny to wrap an arm around you. He knew he needed comfort after being beat by his folks and assumed you would need/want that same comfort. You never did want that comfort mostly because the only people in your house was the ones who caused the pain in the first place. On top of that, the likelihood of your father stepping off of his high horse and trying to comfort you was almost as likely as seeing a unicorn.

It just wasn’t possible. He believed he was above you and your emotions which, in God’s eyes, he was. You weren’t supposed to complain as that was wrong too. Everything you had been doing as of late was wrong and you were ashamed to admit that you had willingly done most of it.

You felt the arm that was around you tighten around you more as your body shook with the silent sobs that left you. You had been so strong up until that point and now you couldn’t be strong. You were weak and would never live up to the person your parents seen when they looked at you. You were absolutely disgusting.

You closed your eyes and felt yourself drift off into a dreamless sleep.

You were woken up by someone shaking you gently. “You need to get up.” It was Johnny. He was trying to get you up and out of bed. “Come on. Both your parents left and you needa get up. We gotta go.” Johnny finally picked you up off of your bed and put your feet onto the floor of your bedroom.

“Johnny, we can’t leave? They’re my family.” You whispered out as Johnny started putting your things into a small bag.

“My folks are like yours. They ain’t worth nothin’ if they’re hittin’ you.” Johnny looked at you and gestured around. You started putting clothes into the bag before zipping it up and letting Johnny force your dresser from its place in front of your door.

Johnny intertwined your hands together and led you downstairs where the two of you left the house that you were raised in. It was unnerving and really made you feel terrible.

** One Year Later **

You put the notepad into the pocket of your apron. You were waiting for Johnny to come in so he could walk you back to your shared apartment with him. “Hey, baby!” You heard his voice as the bell above the glass door rung, telling you that someone had come in.

“Hi, lovely.” You pressed a kiss onto his cheek as you waved for him to sit at the counter. You were proud of both yourself and your lover. You made it out of whatever hell you had started in. You’d gotten yourself a psychiatrist/psychologist which you couldn’t remember which one it was but you were getting the help that you desperately need.

“Your shift was good?” Johnny asked as you poured some beer into a glass cup. You were the only one running the diner and Johnny would pay and tip you for pouring him a cup. You didn’t need that tip from him as the two of you shared finances but if you didn’t somehow, you would appreciate it.

“It was fine. I seen a man who looked very similar to my father earlier. Thought he’d finally come back to hurt me.” You set the glass in front of him. You leaned over the counter and pressed a kiss to Johnny’s cheek. You were feeling slightly relieved at the thought of your past life. You loved your parents more than anything but with the help of Johnny and a professional, you realized that God never wanted your father to beat you mercilessly.

You watched as Johnny took a sip of his beer. “We can afford for you to go to more of those sessions.” Johnny didn’t know much about your mental situation but he tried the best he could.

“Yeah, I know. He says I’m doing good for now. Says I’ve come a long way.” You walked around the counter and sat beside Johnny, laying your head on his shoulder. Your eyes were on the clock placed on the wall as you shook the thoughts from your head. “When you finish drinking that, we can leave. I’m closing tonight.” You stood up and watched as Johnny finished off the last of the beer.

He handed you the glass and you were quick to wash it. You were excited to go home and lay in bed with Johnny. You had never thought that you would be excited to just lay beside someone but once you and Johnny started to live the peaceful life, you were excited by the small things. You were looking forward to the future. To the days where you would get to see your future children running around.

You finished up with the cleaning and you began locking the diner up. “Oh, I’m so excited! I can’t wait to lay down and go to sleep.” You groaned out as you put the keys into your pocket. You would give them to Maryann in the morning when she came in. For now, you’d focus on the small family you had made for yourself that consisted of a healthier lifestyle, without the abuse.

Even if said abuse would haunt you for the rest of your life, you were at the very least, happy with yourself and the life you and Johnny had created.

[zedortoo]

Pizza Autism: the novella

Pizza Tower autism and/or ADHD headcanons go go go!!!!

warning there is. So much under the cut. I go off about everyone's tism

Peppino:

-Middle aged man autism. Ohh my god this guy is so autism we're starting off strong

-Most of his stims are physical and are probably. Not the most healthy (biting, banging wrists together, hair pulling etc)

-He has arfid frfr! Despite being a chef he's very careful about what he eats, however most italian foods are safe foods for him.

-Struggle showing empathy, even if he feels it. Yall saw how he reacted to Gerome mourning John he was out of his depth 😭

Gustavo:

-gnome autism.

-poor dude can't understand sarcasm to save his life. Also really bad at comprehending deeper meanings and stuff... Honestly me too Gustavo. Me too.

-actually gets overstimulated really easily. he grew up in a place similar to the gnome forest in the tower, where the air was always somewhat humid. If there's a dehumidifier running anywhere he can practically sense it and will immediately get upset bc he is too dry 💔

-His stims are mainly vocal (i.e. "I'm going to kill you") but he also likes to bounce on the balls of his feet and rock back and forth!

Mr Stick:

-French autism

-Hes not actually a huge asshole all the time, SURE he can be blunt and come off as rude but most of the time the mean persona is a mask. His really close friends know he's just a weird dude

-(stole this idea from Olympe) He is a routine lover!! Has his entire day planned out as soon as he wakes up. If you get in the way of his routine you will be turned into an ambiguous ball of meat. He was SOOOO pissed off when he got stuck in the tower bc it's wasn't in his routine so he robbed the whole damn place out of malice

-Innapropriate reactions to sensetive situations. If he had to comfort someone it would be Joever for him.

-Represses most stims because he thinks he's embarrassing. When in private though he'll spend ages examining textures and smelling paper (I do this all the time it's so fun). Occasionally when he's tired or comfortable he'll let out a high pitched squeak that noone can believe came from that middle aged man.

-I could go on with more. I love talking about this cunt.

Pepperman:

-Capsicum autism.

-Also has inappropriate reactions to things. Has no vocal control either half of the time he doesn't realize he's yelling

-Has a habit of chewing on/wanting to taste everything. Ate several wardrobes worth of Polly pocket clothes as a kid probs. Has to physically stop himself from giving his art supplies a taste. Occasionally eats an eraser still.

-If someone reorganizes his shit they WILL be killed this dude knows exactly where everything he needs is he has his own fucked up system

-Mainly uses stim toys. Has a collection of high end custom made ones but is too afraid of wearing them out so he chews on a toy dog bone instead and it's mangled to BITS

Vigilante:

-Cheese autism.

-This dude has know idea what autism actually is. He knows he's different compared to a lot of people, but he's never had the right word for it.

-Strong sense of justice. If something is wrong he WILL set it right. He got super upset when he realized Peppino wasn't actually an outlaw and he had tried to kill an innocent dude

-HATES HATES HATES processed foods. says he can taste the chemicals.

-Doesnt really stim in public. He'll tap his boot or spin the barrel of his gun if he gets really overstimulated but he much prefers to just pet some of his farm animals until he feels better

Noise:

-Rat autism!!

-This dude constantly needs to be overstimulated he loves it. If things are too quiet he gets super upset and starts bouncing off the walls and shit

-HATES the texture of carbonated drinks but forces himself to drink them because the flavour is worth it.

-Hes has like, three masks on at all times. There's the feral showbiz fella we all know and love, then beneath that is a more controlled businessman type, and beneath THAT is another, slightly less feral rat man.

-goes semi verbal sometimes. Everything just gets tangled up in his mind and he can't spit out the words he wants. He hates it when this happens during a show.

Noisette:

-Bunny autism!!!

-classic weirdgirl type. Would totally read warrior cats and roleplay as a cat on the playground as a kid.

-Also really bad with understanding emotions. You have to tell her specifically if she's upset you or something otherwise she just will not realize.

-makes a lot of vocal stims. Mainly just little beeps and stuff (I like to think she'd make that one jerma substitute teacher noise. Does anyone know what I'm talking about) Also loves to rock back and forth!!

-Has texture issues. She personally disposed of all the Sherpa fleece in the tower.

Fake peppino:

-autism supreme.

-like fr this dude is just the embodiment of autism. it eats vaccines to get more autistic/j

-cant understand when it's making someone upset. Actually, similar to Noisette, is bad at perceiving negative emotions overall.

-mirrors a lot. I mean that's like an integral part of their character. They mainly take after Peppino but will start acting like someone if he's around them long enough.

-melts into a puddle when overstimulated. Honestly? I wish I could do that too.

-Mainly mirrors stims from friends. It freaked everyone out when they started repeating Gustavo's catchphrase.

Pizzahead:

-PIZZA AUTISM!!!

-horrible moral compass this dude will do anything she wants and genuinely won't see what's wrong with it. Case in point the whole of pizza tower

-used to mask her true silly self a lot to be considered more 'normal' but decided normal ppl were boring as hell and dropped the charade

-arfid haver!! Loves pastries and breads and stuff, basically refuses to eat anything else. Has a personal vendetta against cantaloupe and has vowed to destroy it all bc he hates it soooo much

-taps his foot as a stim!! Also likes to jump around and the like, will rapidly shake their fists if incredibly excited

Gerome:

-Rock autism

-This guy loves his own company. Sure, he'll happily be social, but drops the mask as soon as he's alone. Just likes to be alone!

-Also not big on touch. The only person who's allowed to lay a finger on him is John, if anyone else just like. pats him on the back he will freeze up.

-loves being a janitor because the job is mostly repetitive. He cleans each floor in his own order, he has it all sorted out!

-loves bath bombs and stuff. Really likes the smells and just the fizz and the way they crumble in his fingers. Sometimes he'll just throw one in the sink and watch it for ages

-makes this weird clicking noise in the back of his throat as a stim. It's a rather unsettling noise but it's really the only way he stims in public. When alone he likes to feel textures of different things

John:

-hivemind autism!

-I feel bad for this dude man imagine having your being spread out through several different pocket dimensions and all of them have different textures and shot this poor bugger must've been overstimulated for years

-very blunt. Says what he wants with no remorse. Also doesn't have any volume control so often doesn't realize he's yelling

-I imagine when he was resurrected and was no longer a hivemind he had to take a long time alone just being himself. Duuuude imagine having to mask for YEARS because you were never ever alone I would lose my fucking marbles

-opposite of his brother, he doesn't understand personal space. Will often accidentally get I'm ppls faces because he doesn't realize how close he is to them. This also makes him somewhat clumsy and he has a habit of running into things

-Mainly has facial/expression stims. Will pull a big ol' grimace if something goes wrong and grin like an idiot when happy (see: when he got revived)

[sourstroll]

Summer Of Cum 2023

Day 9 - Premature ejaculation

Pairing: Carlos/Lando

WC: 1080

❀❀❀❀

Lando had always had a hard time believing people when they said they liked him.

When Carlos first admitted to him that he liked him as more than a friend, he had thought it was a joke, genuinely. Carlos took action immediately, though, proved to him instantly that it was true by kissing him and not pulling away until Lando reciprocated.

Now, a few years on and a move to another team later, Lando still struggled to believe it sometimes. Carlos had never let up, never stopped professing his love or touching him wherever he could while cameras were watching.

It felt too good to be true, having Carlos in his lap while they made out, hot and sweaty and too drunk to be making good decisions.

Carlos had been glued to his side all night, whispering things in his ear that Lando couldn’t repeat, quite handsy as he got more and more intoxicated.

Technically, this was supposed to be a celebration for Max, the club full of other drivers and their girlfriends, as well as a few team principles. Lando had only shown up because Carlos insisted. Even after not being teammates for a couple of years, Lando still couldn’t get out of the habit of doing anything he asked him to do. They’d snuck into one of the private VIP rooms and hoped to God it wasn’t booked tonight.

“What about Charles, huh?” Lando asked between kisses, both to tease and as a serious question. He knew their relationship wasn’t completely innocent, and he didn’t want to upset Charles if it was more serious between them than they led on. “I’m not making out with his boyfriend, am I?” Lando chuckled, hands shamelessly going to unbutton Carlos’s shirt.

“No,” Carlos sighed and went to kiss Lando’s neck as he undressed him, unsteady and sloppy, wishing he could just have Lando inside of him already. “Well- Yes, but- it’s okay. Seriously,” Carlos insisted, pulling away when Lando started to tug his shirt off. “He knows about how we used to be. And that I like you too,” Carlos murmured, fingers shakily unbuttoning Lando’s shirt as well, smiling softly when he felt Lando’s hands on his hairy chest.

Lando is surprised to hear that Charles was apparently okay with this. He supposed it made sense, especially since Charles’s fling with Max was no secret to the rest of the grid, but it was still a bit jarring that they were open, yet still together. “What if I fuck you so good you’ll want to come back to me?” Lando purred and kissed Carlos again, the Spaniard moaning into his mouth, obviously liking the way he was talking.

“I love him,” Carlos said and instinctively grinded his hips down against Lando, their clothed cocks rubbing together, making Carlos’s brain feel mushy. “I love you too,” he smirked, still rolling his hips against him as he kissed Lando once more.

Lando gasped as Carlos grinded into him, his hands landing on Carlos’s ass, helping him move back and forth. He was speechless at Carlos’s words, even though he’d heard him say it before. It still felt unreal to have someone so beautiful, so perfect, so talented, love him.

Lando doesn’t check to see if the door to the room is locked before he laid Carlos back on the bench they were sitting on, almost immediately going to unbutton his pants. “Fucker,” he huffed out, hurriedly tugging Carlos’s pants and boxers off. “Every time I think I’m over you, you say some shit like that,” he murmured, going to start a tirade of kisses all over his chest, all while his hand wrapped around Carlos’s heavy cock, hard and leaking in his fist, wanting Lando’s touch badly.

Carlos could do nothing but lay there and take it, listening to Lando express his woes about their strange relationship. “Stop it,” he whined, a reaction to Lando stroking him slowly, his legs wrapping around Lando to pull him closer. “Don’t get over me, please,” he begged, head tipping back as Lando’s lips started a trail down his tummy, nipping his hip bones playfully.

“I won’t,” Lando assured, tongue darting out to lick a fat stripe up the length of Carlos’s cock, humming as his lips wrapped around the head.

Carlos’s eyes widened at how electric Lando’s tongue felt, much too worked up to react normally. He hadn’t been touched by Lando in a good while, and being drunk just made everything feel fuzzy and warm at the edges. “Lando,” he groaned, tangling a hand into his hair when Lando started bobbing his head, sucking his length down with ease.

Before Carlos could even process what was happening, he could feel his body tighten up and release without warning, his cock twitching as he came in Lando’s mouth. Carlos let out a pitiful moan, feeling both embarrassed and greedy about it, about how much he loved Lando. He’d never done this before, never finished himself off before they even started. It was a lot to handle, both his feelings and his desire for Lando, but he’d never thought it would make him come so fast.

Lando pulled off in surprise, watching the rest of Carlos’s come spurt out and drip down his fist, spitting out the rest over the head, stroking him through it despite his shock. That was definitely new. If anything, it was usually Lando who struggled to last very long when he was turned on. It felt good to know that he made Carlos this way, so sensitive that he couldn’t even last a minute. “Oh, you poor thing,” Lando chuckled sweetly and let go of his cock, giving Carlos a break before they continued.

Carlos struggled to catch his breath, still processing what he’d just done. Sure, Charles had pulled orgasms out of him pretty quickly before, but never like this. “I don’t- I didn’t mean to-“ he tried to explain between big breaths, only relaxing when he felt Lando’s lips kiss him on the cheek, then his lips, sweet and simple.

“Shh, it’s okay,” Lando murmured. “I’m sexy, I know it’s hard to contain yourself,” he joked, laughing when Carlos shoved gently at his shoulder. “I love you too,” he said, punctuating his joke with something that would soothe the older man’s embarrassment.

Carlos’s hands went to cover his face, still processing what had just occurred. “I know,” he murmured, muffled by his hands. “I love you too much,” he decided.

❀❀❀ Previous Days ❀❀❀

[howdoesagrapewrites]

GOLLY GOLLY GOSH, I JIST BINGED YOUR YANDERE GAYATRI X PAVITR X READER FICS AND OMG 🤭🤭

It’s so gooddd but I can’t help but wonder what would happen if the reader just didn’t understand love- like totally. This is so entirely spurred on by my own problems and IFHY by Tyler (live laugh love Tyler the creator 🙏) but like just imagine them x a reader who just doesn’t understand love and believes love is just being aggressively possessive and obsessive over someone.

I can just imagine Gayatri, Pavitr and the Reader getting into a heated argument and the reader just flat out says they hate them both with this dead stare- and then they follow it up with telling them both that they love them but now Gayatri and Pavitr realize there’s nothing behind the readers eyes when they say ‘I love you’. It’s not love, it’s straight obsession. Idk I just feel like it’d be an interesting idea for a fic :D

Also your writing is so good! You should totally take up a Career in writing or write a book, I just love how you describe everything!

𝙒𝙚'𝙧𝙚 𝙜𝙤𝙤𝙙 𝙖𝙩 𝙗𝙚����𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙗𝙡𝙚𝙙

Cw: the usual yandere stuff, manipulation, psychological abuse, kinda yandere reader?

Notes: I hope I did this request justice, I rewrote it a lot 😭if you don't like it you can always request it again, I'm really nervous about this because I don't want to disappoint you😿

"I fucking hate you both" the words leave your lips like nothing, like the grocery list, like small talk, like those words didn't carry the weight of the world. Heavy like a rock, and as plain as one, simple combination of five words, from the infinite combinations possible with the 171,476 words recognized in the Oxford dictionary, and the roughly one million words used by english speakers, it took you only five words to unleash hell, to emotionally destroy two people in ways one person cannot calculate or articulate.

You'd been accepting and supporting (you were simply unbothered, however they see it like that) of their unorthodox way to carry the relationship, you had a few "quirks" of your own as well something that they both accepted and loved, so this came as a shock. In Pavitr's mind, you don't mean this, you're simply upset, but his thoughts race back and forth thinking what did the do to upset you, what he did. It couldn't be Gayatri, she's perfect, it has to be him, it's always him, he's the one that puts your lives in danger all the time, it's his fault Gayatri's father almost died, his fault your universe was almost wiped off of existence, and now he has made you upset. In his mind there's no much difference between dying and being forgotten, or worse, even loathed by you, well, maybe there's one. That he'd rather be dead.

But Gayatri is another story, she refuses to accept whatever you meant. Her mother left, you can't leave too, she cannot be alone in this world again, and as if out of self preservation, she's possessive over you, over Pavitr, over your relationship, she's authoritarian but so deeply fragile, wearing her emotions on her sleeve, trying to be calm and collected, however she miserably fails when the scalding hot sentiments make their way from her chest to her mouth. She will trap, fix, change or break anything that is necessary to ensure she's never left alone again, even if "anything" includes your mind.

They stand before you, dumbfounded, with expressions that in less than a second can vary between sadness, anger, disappointment, terror, paranoia, outrage, and probably more, probably that's just the tip of the iceberg.

And all you do is stare, you watch their contorting faces and with the dead silence, it's almost like you can hear the blood pumping through their veins, full of anxiety.

Before they can properly process your statement, you contradict it, to anyone it seems like you're toying with them, like a cat watching its prey agonize. At heart, the cat is innocent, the cat does not posses a moral compass that will tell him to either stop or further the pain of their lizard, the act of torture cannot be sadistic if the perpetrator doesn't find pleasure in it. The vile acts of a creature that lacks malice.

"I love you" and life seems to recover its rightful flow, or it should, they could ignore what you said and take you back just like that, but it doesn't work that way, not when you have two obsessive lovers.

"What do you mean?" Gayatri is distrustful

"That I love you."

Pavitr notices first, notices your blown pupils and lost gaze, no emotion behind those eyes he adores, had it always been that way? Has every "I love you" meant the infinity of the void?

And Gayatri, she always knew, she loved everything that was there to love about you, even if you didn't understand, if she needed to show you the depth of her love through aggression, violence and obsession, she will.

"I love you too" they said at unison.