#this is gonna be the saddest fic ever guys

[rqsser]

beginning of another fic… i swear below deck chap 8 is next gang

It was the wedding day of his cousin. Marge; they’d grown up together, amongst the large family that lived in Manitowoc. John was an Egan, and Marge was a Spencer. Spending time with each other was common when they had been children, but they went their separate ways in high school.

All of John’s focus went to finding a job to get out of his grandmother's house rather than his education, and Marge, well John didn’t know what she decided to do. She went off to college not two months after graduation.

During that time, she’d found a boyfriend, then later a fiancée. John didn’t even know his name. Why would he need to have that knowledge? It’s not like he did weekly visits or calls to check in on Marge anyway.

No doubt she found someone equally as bubbly and friendly as Marge was. John wasn’t sure that he could handle that. Having his school friends be in the same social circle as his cousin hadn’t been the best thing.

They were attracted to her outgoingness and expected nothing less from John, only to be disappointed when they were told of his familial situation. Few managed to gain John’s trust; Curt, Brady, and Jack.

He preferred to keep himself closed off.

Never rude, John absolutely refused to take part in the bully that kids like him would cause. Ones who didn’t know where they belonged; amongst the rebellious teenage phase that they probably would never leave. No, John promised to himself, his hands pressed together in prayer, that once he turned eighteen, he would leave Manitowoc and never look back. Not even to reminisce of the times when he truly enjoyed life beyond paychecks.

That day, he wandered around the reception of the hotel. It was a luxurious place, John thought that Marge must have indulged her schooling in something sophisticated, like law or the medicines.

He knew not a soul. Well, obviously he had known his family all of his life, but they didn’t feel like anything more than a mystery of DNA that he could be traced back to. He didn’t care for them, not even Marge. John had only come for a change of scenery, he was growing tired of the same route to the post office every day. Dealing with the same incompetent customers on a weekly schedule.

Even thinking about work could give John a headache. Twenty-six, feeling like seventy. Maybe he should’ve been eating caviar on the Titanic with Rose, not running like Jack. Then he’d have his ending set out in front of him and straight forward, not a satisfying one but perhaps a proper one. John could meet the person that completed him, even if Curt had once harshly described him as a shell of romance. He wallowed in the hallmark of love, wishing but never receiving. Maybe it was because he complained out loud.

How had Marge found someone already? She was younger than John, only by a year, but it still felt uncanny that she met her match so early in life. Really, it made sense to John. Marge, albeit immaturely, opened her heart to anyone who so much as gave her a small grin. John, not so much. That could’ve been why they grew apart, John thought.

A wedding was a good idea. Something to cleanse John of his self-sorrow, even if he would be basking in the longing of a lover as the night dragged on.

Purposefully, John avoided being in the sights of his grandmother. She had never really been fond of him; only took him in because she would have been resented if not. John probably would prefer a teenage shelter to his father’s mother’s beaten couch and yellowing floral walls.

He got some side glances as he paced around the hotel. Expected, most of the younger crowd had no idea who he was.

[only-luce-the-goose]

Heeeey pookie!!

i loved your Arthur fic too much, the man deserves to receive more love here🥹🫶🫶 I have two ideas for you, which in my head make more sense. I will try to explain myself as best as I can but in reality this is not my strong point LMAO

If you want and can write something about loving every little thing the reader does, such as the habit of brushing his hair behind his ears or, for example, when he reads a book that she cries, smiles or curses as if he LOVES that about her. 😮‍💨💗

Or maybe something about him being a little jealous and possessive not in a grotesque sense like I had to defend her from someone in a bar or something, like her being too nice by not wanting to walk away so as not to hurt the other person even if it's bothering her (that happens to me often haha😅)

Maybee some of the care for her when she's sick 🥹🥹

Of course, only if you feel comfortable with these ideas, which were more than two, I apologize for that, I'm a little excited.🧍🏻‍♀️🫶🫶

(I hope I have made myself understood, also English is not my first language, I am sorry if this is complicated when read or understood, also sorry this was so long :(, anyway much love to you 💗💗💗💗)

Little things

A/N: I am going to write all of them, they're so cute. Arthur absolutely deserves more love, he's underrated. Don't worry btw, your English is fantastic. I'm actually Australian so my spelling of certain words are different to everyone else's 😅. Keep an eye on my page for the next few days, I'll release them soon (I just need to finish my uni assignment first, whoops 🤷‍♀️). I hope I did what you were thinking 🫶🫶

Arthur Leclerc x reader

Warnings: Fluffy/Simp Arthur

Synopsis: "If you want and can write something about loving every little thing the reader does, such as the habit of brushing his hair behind his ears or, for example, when he reads a book that she cries, smiles or curses as if he LOVES that about her. 😮‍💨💗" - This part of the request.

You and Arthur were lying on the couch watching a movie after a long day. You propped up my pillows with Arthur on top of you, head resting on your chest. Your fingers started to scratch the back of his scalp, slowly worth their way up. He sighed as he pressed himself deeper into you, nuzzling his face into your skin. He lifted his head up and pecked your lips. You look down at him and giggled, “what was that for, baby?”. He looked up at you with a peaceful smile, his eyes brimming with love as he replied “just appreciating the small things” before resting his head back on your chest as you kept scratching his head.

The next time it happened, you guys were cuddled up in bed and you were reading a book. It might be one of the saddest books you had ever read in your life (for this I’m gonna use “Bridge to Terabithia” cuz I feel like everyone read it for school). You got the the chapter where the girl fell into the creek and drowned. The pure amount of detail broke your heart and sent you into a sobbing mess. Your sniffles caught Arthur’s attention, he looked down the see his shirt beginning to get wet. He pulled you up to face him as we wiped your tears. “Hey hey hey what happened mi amor?” He rushed. You explained what happened, causing Arthur to give you that look again. A peaceful smile, eyes brimming with love, he pecked your lips, “how about we read a happier book?” He suggested. “No” you said as you made eye contact again “I just wanna cuddle”. He grinned and settled down, pulling you into him “that is something I can definitely do”. You smiled as you tucked yourself into his side.

Another instance was when you and Arthur were walking through the paddock. The crowd was pushing and shoving, sweeping you away with them. Arthur quickly realised you had gotten caught up, jogging back to guide you again. You think your right hand to his left, your left hand coming up to hold his strong bicep on the same arm, basically wrapping yourself around his arm. You have his hand a little squeeze, leaning your head on his shoulder when he squeezed back. You made it to the Ferrari garage and you knew you would need to let go but you didn’t want to, do you didn’t. Arthur planted a kiss on your forehead and gave you that dopey, in love look he gives you in moments like these. “What?” You laughed. Arthur pecked your lips “nothing my love” he mumbled against them, “just admiring” he winked. Just like a school girl, you giggled and then cuddled into him, are grip still tight on his arm.

What really stood out is when you were cleaning your shared apartment. You were going through your shared closet when you found a brown leather book. The title on the inside of the book, in Arthur’s unmistakeable handwriting, was “those moments”. You flicked through the book and saw dates and times, which matched to all the moments when Arthur gave you the look. Scratching his head on the couch, crying at a book, being clingy at the paddock, it was all there. What you didn’t know, was that Arthur was leaning on the door frame, watching you read his little things journal. “Find something good, amor?” You jumped at his question. “I’m so so sorry. I shouldn’t be snooping but I’ve never seen it before, and I had no idea what it was for. I’m sorry, I should’ve given you your privacy an-” Arthur cut you off with a kiss. “Im glad you found it. Everytime you ask about this “look” I give you, you now know what I was feeling and thinking. Is that ok amor?” He has a glimmer of home in his eyes as he asks you. You put the book back where you got it from, wrapped your hands around his neck and kissed him deep “of it is, I love you Arthur” “I love you mi amor”

[whatsk-poppinhomies]

Pairing : Dad!Seo Changbin x F!Reader TW : heavily triggering content ; reader discretion is advised ; stillborn child ; depression ; anger ; self hatred ; isolation ; it's just really sad and angsty ; Word Count : 2.9k Request : it won the poll! Here he is! A/N : PLEASE READ THE TRIGGER WARNINGS BEFORE YOU READ THIS FIC! I CRIED WHILE WRITING THIS! THIS WAS PROBABLY THE SADDEST ONE I'VE WRITTEN, SADDER THAN FELIXS FIC. I DON'T KNOW IF I SHOULD DO A PART 2 FOR THIS ONE, LET ME KNOW IN THE COMMENTS. AGAIN THOUGH, READ THE TW'S I BEG OF YOU. THIS ONE IS DEVASTATING, AT LEAST FOR ME IT WAS.

“I can’t wait to hold you and hug you and cuddle you! You’re gonna be daddy’s little princess, aren’t you?” Changbin cooed as he pressed his face against your stomach, smiling when he felt the kick against his hand that had been absentmindedly rubbing circles right above where her foot was. “I’m gonna spoil you and give you the whole world, I promise… Well, maybe not the whole world, I don’t think I can do that… But, I’ll give you anything you want. You’re so precious to me already, I can’t wait to meet you…” 

You chuckled lightly, brushing your fingers through his curly locks, shaking your head that rested upon a mound of pillows. “You better keep all those promises, babe. I know she can hear you, and she’s gonna hold you to all of that. And so am I. You get to hold her and hug her and cuddle her the first week I’m out of the hospital. I’m gonna lay in bed and rest after carrying her for 9 months.”

He nodded excitedly up at you before peppering kisses along your belly. “I’ll just quit my job so I can be a super cool stay at home dad and I’ll spend so much time with her. How am I even supposed to go back to work when you and her are gonna be here? I wanna spend every single day with you two.” He pouted and you swiped your finger along his jutted out lip, giving him a soft smile to try to cheer him up. 

“We’ll be here when you get home, and before you go to work. And I’m sure that once she’s old enough, I’ll be able to bring her to the studio to see you and the guys.” He nodded his head along with your words, relaxing once more against your stomach, his buff arms wrapped around it and the silence was soon filled with the lulling sound of him humming to you and your baby girl. 

///

“Sir, we have to take her now…” 

Changbin sat in the chair beside your empty bed, holding his daughter close to his chest as tears poured down his cheeks, his body rocking back and forth. “Just a little bit longer, please…. My wife hasn’t even gotten to see her yet. Y-You can’t take her before my wife gets to hold her… Please…” He sobbed, his head dropping down to look down at the porcelain like face of his baby girl. 

“I’m… I’m sorry… Your wife is in recovery and… She won’t be awake… We can’t just let you keep her. I’m terribly sorry, we have to take her now.” The nurse repeated themselves, walking closer to Changbin. His head shook violently as his sobs became louder, his hold on his daughter tighter than it had been before. 

There was no way to describe the pain, the devastation, the anger that he felt. “I can’t… I…” He couldn’t even finish, not when he felt the stillness of his daughter in his arms, the way her skin was so colorless, she almost looked like a doll. “Just a little… I have to… I have… I… T-To say… I have to say… G-Goodbye… To her…” He stammered the words out through shaky breaths, and the nurse simply nodded, allowing Changbin to have this final moment. 

Trembling fingers gently brushed over the dark hair that covered his daughter's head, her skin felt cold against his finger tips. It was the first and the last time he’d ever get to hold her, that he’d ever get to see her. Life was cruel in its punishments that seemed to be thrown upon those most undeserving of them. What had he done? What had you done to deserve to have your newborn child stolen from you without the opportunity to even cherish her, to love her, to get to know her? 

“I’m so… So sorry…” Changbin whimpered, his head shaking as it felt against the back of the chair. His throat was dry and his eyes felt like they were on fire from crying so much. “I would have… I… The world… I would have given you the world if… if you had just… stayed here with us… Me and y-your mommy… We love you… We love you so much… You know that, right? I don’t wanna… L-Let them take you a-away from me… I just… I wanted to h-hold you… And… And hug you… And cuddle you… F-forever… And… I just… I can’t…” His breaths came more rapidly now, more labored as the seconds slowly ticked down the last little bit of time that he’d have with her. “You’ll… You’ll always be… M-My little girl… My princess… I promise… I’ll come see you… O-One day… When daddy and mommy… When we get r-really old… We’ll come s-see you… And I can… I can hold you… And love you… And hug you… And I won’t e-ever let you go… Okay…? I… I love you…” 

The door was slowly opened and the nurse quietly came over to Changbin. This was it. Once she was out of his arms, she’d be gone for good, he’d never be able to see her again, not until his final day came. How was he supposed to stay strong? How was he supposed to go on with his life at any point as if a piece of his heart hadn’t been ripped out of his chest and stolen from him right before his eyes? How was he supposed to live when simply breathing and living felt unfair? 

///

You sat in the wheelchair, Changbin beside you, one hand gripping tightly onto yours and the other holding the multitude of flowers and “Sorry” balloons that he wanted nothing to do with. Sure, people were sorry, they felt bad for what he and you had gone through, but none of them truly understood it, not until they were unfortunate enough to be put in the same situation, and for their sakes, he hoped they never would be. 

“We’ll be home soon, baby.” Changbin whispered to you, although home didn’t seem very welcoming. Not when the room across the hall from his and yours was fully decorated, a beautiful nursery for a beautiful little baby girl that would never be brought through the front door. She would never lay her head in the crib, covered by the quilted blanket that was meant to keep her warm. She would never become attached to one or many of the stuffed animals that were perfectly set up in the corner of the room. She would never be cradled in the rocking chair, rocked back to sleep during the wee hours of the morning. Neither you or Changbin would experience these things, not with the perfect little girl that you both had been waiting for. 

Flashing lights and camera shutters clicking met both you and Changbin right outside the hospital exit as you were wheeled out. You were out of it, zoning into a world, into a reality where maybe your daughter was still with the two of you. Your eyes were glossed over from the tears that you had shed nonstop. These were the images of you that would be plastered all over the internet within the next 12 to 24 hours, and that had Changbin fuming. 

“Back up! Back up!” Changbin shouted, his voice hoarse and his throat dry from having cried so much. How could people be so heartless, so cruel? They didn’t care about what he and you had just gone through. The only thing they cared about was the next story they could come out with that would make headline news. “Please, leave me and my wife alone! Go! Leave!” He continued to shout, standing in front of you as the security team tried to help push through the overwhelming amount of paparazzi. 

“Changbin! How are you feeling right now?” “When do you plan on returning to music?!” “Will your next album have songs that touch base on what you’ve gone through?” The questions were irritating, the complete lack of respect was sickening, but there was one question that had Changbin so infuriated that he couldn’t control himself. “Do you think now that you won’t have a child to worry about, you’ll be able to focus more on your music once again without the child holding you back? Do you think this is a good thing for your career?” 

It was insensitive to say the least, and he didn’t even take a second to question himself as to whether it would be a good idea to react, his fist was flying forward into the face of the man that had so stupidly uttered such a thing in his direction. “Get out of here! Go home! All of you!” He screamed, a fresh wave of tears rippling down his cheeks as he tried to move you faster towards the car. “Respect mine and my wife’s privacy. Please! God, please just leave us alone!” He continued to scream, and it seemed like the way he had responded to the man had quieted the mass amount of people. They weren’t asking any questions, but they were still taking pictures and recording you and him. They wouldn’t stop. It wasn’t their pain to feel, they would just report on it and make a quick buck off of someone else’s suffering. It was nauseating. 

///

“She… She hasn’t let go of her urn since we’ve gotten it. I don’t know what to do… I can’t take it away from her. She didn’t even get the chance to hold her… This is all she’s got… But I’m worried about her…” Changbin whispered to Chan as they sat in the living room. Changbin was a mess, but you were far worse. He had gotten to say goodbye, you didn’t even have the chance to do that much. There was a hole left in your heart that no one would ever be able to fill or even patch up. He felt guilty for being able to have that small amount of time with his daughter, for being able to have that chance that was taken away from you. “She won’t eat… She won’t even leave the bedroom. She just… She keeps crying and… And I don’t know what to do… I feel so helpless.” 

Changbins face fell into his palms, his body shaking as he silently cried into his hands. It felt like that’s all he did anymore. He just cried. There was nowhere that he could go in the house where he wasn’t hit with the stark reminder of what he had lost. “She’s grieving, Bin… Everyone does that in their own way. You both lost your child… Before you even had the chance to even have her truly. I can’t… The pain that you both feel is unimaginable, and… We’re all here for you, for Y/N. But right now, you two need each other more than anything.” Chan explained, and while Changbin nodded his head in understanding, it was easier said than done. 

It was hard to be there for someone emotionally when he himself felt like he was falling apart. “She won’t talk to me… She won’t talk to anyone. I’ve been keeping her family updated, but they’re just as worried as I am. They want her to come home for a bit for a change of scenery… What the hell is that going to do?! And what am I supposed to do if she leaves?! Stay here and… And be by myself with all of this stuff… With all of her stuff?! I can’t even go to the damn bathroom or take a shower without breaking down because the little shampoo bottles are on the tub and the… the little bath seat… and her towels and… God, it’s like… It’s like she’s here but… but I know she’s not…” 

There was no easy way to comfort anyone who went through what both you and Changbin went through, maybe there was no way to comfort the two of you at all, not right now at least. “Maybe… Maybe you and Y/N can go on a trip or something, just to get away from it all. The guys and I, we can start taking down all the stuff for when-” 

“No!” Changbin blurted out, his head shaking fast as he stared at Chan with wide eyes. “You can’t… You can’t take her stuff… That's all we have left. Just… Just give us time… We’re not ready. We lost her… We don’t want to just… get rid of her… We just need time…” 

///

“Baby…” Changbin whispered softly, his fingers brushing through your hair as you laid beside him in bed. Your daughter's urn sat on the nightstand, and while it hurt him to see it there, your reasoning for having it right beside you was too heartbreaking for him to want to move it. “Are you still awake?” He asked, feeling your body shaking ever so slightly. It was clear that you had just finished crying, he just wasn’t sure if you had cried yourself to sleep or if you had just run out of tears. 

You hummed quietly in response, taking a raspy breath before rolling over to face him. It felt like it had been ages since he got to see your face, but the puffiness under your eyes and your chapped lips had his heart breaking into tinier pieces. You looked broken, and he didn’t even know where to begin to try to help put you back together. “I’m… I’m sorry… That I couldn’t… Give you your… Perfect baby… And I’m… I’m sorry that… That the fans are m-mad at you… F-For not making music… And… And I’m sorry… That… That I haven’t been there… For you…” 

The choked out words that left your mouth had Changbin absolutely shocked, confused, and devastated that you felt that way. He didn’t even know that that was the way you were feeling, and if he had known before, he would have done his best to try to push those thoughts out of your head. “Baby, it’s not your fault. None of it is your fault. It’s no one's fault. I don’t want you to blame yourself… You still… You gave me the most beautiful baby girl, the most perfect baby girl in the whole world. God, I wish you could have seen her… I’m so sorry you couldn’t. She was… She was like an angel… She really was. She… She looked like you, I could already see it… She was beautiful, and she was already so loved… She knew you loved her…” 

“Did you tell her…? Did you tell her I love her?” You asked, and Changbin quickly nodded his head, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you against his chest. Your tears soaked through his shirt, but he didn’t care, for his own tears were falling against the top of your head and dampening your hair. It had been so long since he had held you like this, but he knew that right now it’s what you needed most. 

“I did… She knows. I told her you love her, and I love her… We both love her very much… And I’m sure that wherever she is, she can see that…” He murmured. “And I don’t want you to worry about the fans or the music. If they can’t understand, then they weren’t real fans anyway. The music can wait. You are the most important thing in the world to me. I’d give up my whole career just to see you smile again, just to try to make you happy. I’m going to be here for you as long as you need me to be, even if you don’t want me around. I love you… And we’re going to get through this together.” 

He felt your head nod and your arms wrap around him, your fingers gripping onto his shirt to hold him closer to you. “Can… Can she stay in here…? I… I don’t want her to be alone in… in that room… Not yet…” You asked, and Changbin nodded his head before kissing the top of yours and then gently laying you back down against your pillow. 

“She can stay in here with us as long as you want her to. I don’t want her to be alone either…” With his arm tucked underneath the pillow that your head lay upon, he hummed a soft tune to lull you back to sleep. It was the first night that you had gone to sleep without crying, it was the first night that you had talked to him. Now he understood what it meant to be strong, not just physically, but emotionally, for the ones that he loved. He might be breaking into bits on the inside, but he loved you too much to watch you fall apart. 

Carefully, he reached over you with his free hand, grabbing the urn off the nightstand and cradling it against his chest, staring up at the ceiling as silent tears trickled down from the corners of his eyes and across his temple, landing on the pillow underneath his head. “I’m gonna hold you, and I’ll cuddle you… And I’ll hug you… And I’ll love you forever. I can’t wait to see you again… Just wait for mommy and daddy… We’ll be there… And I’ll never let you go… Ever… You’re daddy’s little princess… And you always will be…”

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[huiyi07]

some of my top haikyuu fanfictions (ranked accordingly)

Come Morning Light (354k) by SharkbaitSekki is the saddest, most devastating fic i have ever read. If you like gen fics, karasuno family, and angst, this genuinely hit all those boxes and more for me and changed my life because I read those sexy 350k words in less than 24 hours when i was 13 yrs old and i haven't ever forgotten this fic. I promise the premise is kinda intimidating and all but i swear to GOD this is my atyd. this is my in another life. this is my roman empire

the future is female (85k) by earlgray_milktea is the cutest, but at the same time one of the most satisfying fics i've ever read. just a completely enjoyable and investing fic all the way, and again the premise does sound kinda trope-y and all but this fic is so fun! and smart and clever and important! yes it is basically hinata as a girl posing as a boy just to be taken seriously in the volleyball scene, but it goes about it in such a smart way and! it stretches all the way from the start to the post-timeskip of haikyuu (but it's not a super long read).

national hot dad alliance is now calling... (58k) by dicaeopolis, owlinaminor is probably a fic you've seen before, and if you haven't read it it probably means you hate chatfics and think they're dumb but i PROMISE this fic is singlehandedly the most hilarious thing i have ever read. 58k doesn't sound extremely long, but this dumb silly thing lasted me so long because i would just read a bit whenever i needed a laugh, more than that it was also lowkey so sad towards the end and it didn't need to be, but it really adds to the completeness of this fic and i love it

chasing gold (45k) by skiecas is gonna be, like, the only fic here with hardcore romance and some sus bits that you can honestly just skip. Premise is basically Iwaoi throughout the years since highschool with a focus on the olympics, specifically; and i'm currently posting this at the time of the paris olympics szn, so if you're feeling festive, this is the fic! i also love when romance fics expand on the world around them, and this fic does exactly that with other characters' involvement and the overall amazingly fun, dramatic and grand backdrop of the olympics. such a good fic!

Come Back (25k) by Soralith deserves to be a STAPLE of haikyuu fanfiction, right up there with those mofos in another life and the galaxy is endless. why? well, it hits all the boxes - slash (kagehina), angst, DEATH, made me sob uncontrollably. read this guys its sad lol

[serenelystrange]

Summary:

In which Buck is a grocery store cashier who lives a quiet life with his sister, until Eddie wanders into his line one day looking like the saddest shelter cat in the world. And Buck? Buck has always had a soft spot for animals. (They, as always, fall in love.)

Notes:

There are no actual animals in this fic. Tis but a metaphor!

For @carolinahope - who was looking for an AU where neither of them were firefighters!

Under the cut, or over at AO3!

Buck hears the kid first, a tiny but demanding voice calling out to him as the grocery cart is pushed into Buck’s checkout lane.

“Hi!” the little boy yells to him from under a mop of blonde curls and bright red eyeglasses. “I said hiii!”

Buck’s laughing even as the boy’s father sighs at his antics.

“Hi, buddy,” Buck says to the kid, giving him an indulging grin.

“He’s really into saying hi to everyone right now,” the dad explains, “and gets louder and louder the longer nobody responds. Sorry.”

Buck is already waving off the apology as he finally gets a good look at the dad’s face and freezes in place. He’s maybe a little older than Buck, and quite possibly the prettiest man that he’s ever seen.

“Don’t worry about it,” Buck says, shaking himself from his daze. “He’s super adorable, who could be mad at that little face?”

“Thanks,” the guy says, looking up at Buck briefly before dropping his gaze back down to his cart and loading the groceries onto the belt.

Buck frowns to himself as he begins to scan and bag the items, feeling the unfortunately overwhelming urge to explain himself.

“I hope that wasn’t weird,” Buck says, placing the bananas and clementines into a bag along with boxed oatmeal. “I know I’m tall and kinda big and awkward,” he continues, “but I’m not a creeper or anything.”

“What?” the guy looks up from loading the last of his things and gives Buck a confused look. “No, you’re fine. I mean, it’s fine. I didn’t think you were being creepy. I’m just exhausted.”

“Oh,” Buck says, “good. I mean, not good that you’re exhausted, but good that you don’t think I’m creepy. You know, I’m just gonna stop talking now. Your total is $95.14.”

To his surprise, the guy just laughs at him, but kindly, and shakes his head.

“It’s nice,” he says as he’s putting his card in the machine to pay. “To talk to someone over two years old.”

“Well, uh,” Buck stammers through getting him his receipt, “you can talk to me any day. Or I guess any day that I’m here and you happen to be in my line. If you have 10 items or less. Fewer, really. These signs are not grammatically correct, but I guess less is well..less letters, and I’m rambling again, good god. I’m so glad nobody is waiting behind you.”

The guy bursts out laughing, eyes squinting as he reads Buck’s badge.

“I might have to do that. Buck?”

“Yeah,” Buck confirms, shrugging slightly. “Evan, really, but there was another Evan in orientation, and my last name is Buckley, sooo.”

“So Buck it is,” the guy says, appraising him with an open gaze. “It suits you.”

“Thanks,” Buck says, awkwardly, internally squirming at the compliment.

“I’m Eddie,” the guy introduces himself before gesturing to the kid who is now deeply invested in whatever video is pulled up on Eddie’s phone. “And that little hellion is Chris.”

“Hi!” Chris pipes up without looking away from the phone, and Buck can’t lie, he’s immediately besotted.

“Nice to meet you both,” he says to Eddie, blushing lightly as Eddie reaches out and shakes his hand firmly before pulling away. His skin is hot against Buck’s chilled hands, and Buck doesn’t want to let go.

An older woman with definitely more than 10 cans of dog food pulls up behind Eddie, breaking the moment, and Buck hate her just a little bit for it even as he gives her a friendly smile.

“Have a nice day,” he tells Eddie, and gives Chris a little wave goodbye that he doesn’t notice.

“You, too,” Eddie says, pushing Chris and their few bags away as the woman loads the belt up behind them.

Buck watches them go for a few long moments before begrudgingly getting back to work.

“He’s so damn pretty, Mads,” Buck says later that night, across from his sister at their favorite cheap restaurant, several cheap margaritas deep.

Maddie gives him a placating smile and only rolls her eyes a little bit.

“So you’ve said,” she says, mildly, “about ten times now.”

Buck pouts but Maddie just stares back unbothered, immune to his sad eyes by now.

“I know you’re 21 now,” she says as she pulls Buck’s latest drink over to herself, “but maybe you aren’t ready for $3 margaritas when you’re mooning.”

“Hey, that’s mine!” Buck says, reaching for the drink only to be slapped away by Maddie in a practiced move.

“Mine, now,” Maddie says, grinning at him in victory.

“I’m bigger and stronger than you, you know,” Buck says, still pouting.

Maddie just raises an eyebrow at him, says nothing, and waits.

“And you’d still kick my ass, I know, I know” Buck finishes, unable to not laugh at the thought of his itty bitty sister leveling him, even though he knows she’d find a way.

“As long as we’re in agreement,” Maddie says, raising her glass in a cheers to Buck before finishing the rest of the drink.

“We’re gonna have to get an uber,” she says, eyes meeting Buck’s as they both dissolve into tipsy giggles.

They’re still giggling as their disinterested waitress delivers the check, stopping just long enough to make sure neither of them are going to pass out before vanishing back into the depths of the kitchen.

“I think she needs a margarita,” Buck says, giggling all over again.

Maddie just drops her head to her arms on the table, shoulders shaking as she laughs.

It’s a good day.

Eddie is woken up by a cardboard book hitting him in the chest, clutched in Chris’s unsteady hands. He groans and squints against the sunlight streaming into Tia Pepa’s living room.

“Mornin’ mijo,” he mumbles, eyes closed again as he pulls Chris up to snuggle.  

“Story time?” Chris asks, wiggling impatiently against the hold.

Before Eddie can reply, Abuela is hurrying into the room and giving Chris an exasperated look.

“There you are!” She addresses Eddie. “Sorry, I looked away for just a minute. I was trying to let you sleep.”

Eddie chuckles and kisses Chris’ head where he’s finally settled down to cuddle. “It’s ok,” he says, “he’s faster than you’d think when he puts his mind to it.”

“Still,” Abuela says. “You need your rest. And a real bed.”

Eddie groans, and looks up at Abuela with tired eyes.

“I know,” he says. “Chris and I need to find our own place, this house is barely big enough for you and Tia. I’m working on it.”

Abuela gives him a sympathetic look and moves over to ruffle his hair.

“You can stay as long as you need,” she says, “it’s a blessing to have you both here. You know I only worry about your health, sí?”

“I know,” Eddie says, leaning up into her comforting touch. “I know.”

“Story time?” Chris repeats, pushing the book roughly into Eddie’s chest.

“Alright, baby,” Eddie agrees, “story time. What do we have this time?”

“Hungry hungry!” Chris exclaims, patting the Very Hungry Caterpiller in emphasis.

“Hungry hungry it is,” Eddie says, rearranging Chris in his arms so that he can open the book.

Abuela pats Eddie’s head once more before stepping away. “I’ll make breakfast for my hungry boys.”

Eddie thanks her as she walks away, settling himself into story time, Christopher a warm and welcome weight at his side.

“Eddie!” Buck says with enthusiasm as Eddie pulls his cart up to Buck’s checkout lane. “Oh!” Buck says in a hushed voice as he notices Chris conked out in the basket, curled up on a thick leather coat among the meager groceries. “Hi, Chris,” he whispers, smiling dopily at the adorably sleeping toddler for a moment before looking back up at Eddie.

“It’s ok,” Eddie laughs, speaking at a normal volume. “This kid can sleep through anything if he’s tired, you won’t wake him.”

“Ok,” Buck says, still quieter than Eddie suspects he usually is. “How’s it going?” he asks Eddie as he slowly scans and bags the items Eddie unloads.

Eddie shrugs. “It’s going,” he says, genially enough.

Buck takes a moment to really look at him, noticing the dark circles under his eyes and the tired slope of his shoulders.

“You don’t get much sleep, do you?” he asks. “Sorry.”

Eddie nods off the apology. “You’re not wrong,” he says. Taking a moment to make sure nobody is waiting behind him, he leans against the counter with one arm and sighs. “Been working a lot of odd jobs,” he explains. “I got hurt,” he continues, “overseas. Fucked up this shoulder pretty bad, made me useless in the field, so they sent me home with a shiny medal and absolutely no idea how to do… all of this.”

“Shit,” Buck says, frowning at him. “that’s heavy.”

“Yeah,” Eddie laughs without humor. “Too young to feel so old, right?”

Buck shrugs in commiseration, nodding.

“I really need some adult friends,” Eddie says, “sorry to just dump all of that on someone I’ve met twice.”

“Twice so far,” Buck corrects him, beaming again. “And I’d love to be your friend. My only real friend is my sister, and she’s older, with cool older friends that don’t need me hanging around.”

“What are you, 18?” Eddie asks, smirking at Buck’s annoyed pout when talking about his sister.

“I’ll be 22 in a few months,” Buck says, crossing his arms at Eddie’s dubious look. “It’s not my fault I have a baby face, old man.”

“We are literally the same age,” Eddie says, dryly.

“Perfect!” Buck says with delight, “then we can be best friends.”

Eddie laughs and hands Buck his unlocked phone. “Why don’t we start with regular friends, yeah? Put your number in.”

“Nope,” Buck grins as he types in his info, “best friends, I’ve decided.”

True to his word, when Eddie takes his phone back he sees the contact “Buck (Best Friend)” right at the top of his list under Abuela and Adriana.

“You’re ridiculous,” he says, fondly.

Buck just grins.

“And you’re holding up my line, Best Friend,” he says, gesturing to the small line of people that has appeared behind Eddie.

Eddie rolls his eyes but gives Buck another little wave as he leaves. He gets to the car and laughs at the contact name again as he buckles himself into the driver’s seat, but he doesn’t change it.

The last place Eddie expects to run into Buck is the run down restaurant he wanders into on a rare day he’s not working, but here he is. Buck is sitting with a beautiful brunette woman that Eddie really hopes is the sister Buck was talking about. He hesitates by the host podium as he notices them instead of heading to the bar for his beer and nachos like he’d planned. If it’s a date, he doesn’t want to intrude, and his nerves make him freeze up as the hostess asks if he’s ready.

“Eddie?” he hears, shaking him out of it. Buck’s waving over at him with a happy grin. “Hey!” he calls out, you want to sit with us?”

The hostess, seemingly used to Buck’s antics, just grabs the menu and leads Eddie to the table without asking.

“Hey,” Eddie says as they reach the table, the hostess putting his menu down at the seat next to the woman.

“Hi,” she says, looking up at him with an expression he recognizes from Buck’s face.

“You must be the sister,” he says as he sits down and offers his hand to her.

“Maddie,” she confirms. “And Evan’s yelling tells me you must be the Eddie he’s been talking about for weeks.”

“Maddie!” Buck whisper-yells, scandalized. “Be cool!”

Eddie laughs, looking between his outraged face and Maddie’s conspiratorial one.

“It’s ok, Buck,” he says with a smirk. “I already know you aren’t cool.”

“Asshole,” Buck hisses at him.

Eddie has a terrible and hilarious moment within himself where he debates making an ‘you are what you eat’ joke, but stops himself just in time.

“You can sit next to Evan if you want,” Maddie says, “the server won’t care.”

“Margie probably thought you were dating,” Buck agrees, grumpily.

“We are both awfully pretty,” Maddie agrees with barely contained laugh. “But your boytoy here is a little young for me.”

“Oh my god, Maddie,” Buck groans, “he’s not my boytoy. He’s my friend.”

“What happened to Best Friends, huh?” Eddie teases, grinning at the flush that spreads attractively across his face.

“Nope,” Buck says. “Chris is my new best friend. I’m gonna give him so many stickers next time you come through my lane.”

Eddie softens at that, leaning back and smiling at Buck.

“He’d love that.”

Buck smiles back for a moment before Maddie clears her throat with what Eddie swears is a whisper Jesus Christ.

“How about we get some lunch, boys?” she asks, gesturing to the menus they’ve been ignoring. “My treat.”

“Yes!” Buck says, fist pumping the air. He points to Eddie. “Order actual food, you’re too thin.”

“Ok, Abuela,” Eddie scoffs, secretly pleased that Buck seems to care.

From the way Maddie giggles next to him, he thinks she agrees.

Hey bestie

Eddie looks down at this phone and snorts at the text from Buck.

Absolutely not.

Buck’s reply comes in mere seconds later.

You’re no fun. But whatever. Working tonight?

Eddie hesitates, bone tired and drenched in sweat from a day working a construction job Abuela’s church had hired him for. All he really wants to do is shower off the day and maybe treat himself and Chris to a pizza. But on the other hand…

Just getting home. What’s up?

Buck’s first reply is just a line of exclamation points that Eddie finds annoyingly endearing.

Come over and hang out! Maddie is on a date and I’m booooored. I’ll order pizza. We can watch a movie or something. There’s a new John Wick out?

Eddie gets caught up on the or something for a beat too long, knowing just how many different somethings he would like.

I don’t think I can get a babysitter this late notice

Can’t afford one either, Eddie thinks to himself, but doesn’t type.

Bring him! We just wont watch John Wick. Maddie has Disney plus!

And well. Who is Eddie to argue with that.

“Hey buddy!” Buck greets Chris as he opens the door to him and Eddie.

Chris looks around at the unfamiliar home, tucking his head into Eddie’s shoulder with sudden shyness. Eddie has him held in one arm, the other holding what looks like some kind of wheelchair. Buck gives it a curious look as Eddie enters.

“It’s a mobility aid,” Eddie explains as he opens it up and places Chris’ legs into the openings. “Chris has CP, so he’s not as steady as most almost-three year olds. But this lets him walk around by himself, at least a little bit.”

“That’s really cool,” Buck says, crouching down to inspect the chair. It’s almost like a bouncer younger babies use, but more stabilizing than anything. “This is a pretty awesome walker, buddy,” he says to Chris.

He looks up at Eddie and catches the wondrous look on his face.

“What?” he asks, standing back up and moving out of the way for Chris to toddle off and explore.

“It’s just nice,” Eddie explains, “to see someone treat him like he’s any other toddler. Without all the pitying looks on their faces.”

Buck wrinkles his nose in thought as he nods.

“That must be annoying,” he agrees. “Good thing all you’ll get here is pizza and quality Best Friend Time.”

Eddie laughs and shoves Buck’s shoulder playfully.

“Show me around, then.”

“Is this cut small enough?” Buck asks later, fretting as he cuts up cheese pizza to plate for Chris.

“Yes, Buck,” Eddie laughs, “he has teeth, he’ll be fine.”

Buck still looks unsure, not used to little kids. “You sure he won’t choke?”

“If he does, I was a medic, he’ll be ok,” Eddie assures him. The plate Buck put Chris’ pizza on is thick cardboard with the words Happy Birthday splashed across them, probably the only child friendly plate in the place, but Eddie finds the effort impossibly charming.

“Were?” Buck asks, once they’re all settled around the little kitchen table Maddie made him load into his truck from Goodwill one day.

Eddie swallows a bite of his own pizza and nods before responding.

“Certification lapsed when I was recovering,” he says, gesturing to his injured shoulder. “And I haven’t had the time or money to fix that yet.”

“But you aren’t going back into the Army, right?” Buck asks with concern.

“Nope,” Eddie shakes his head. “Honorably discharged. But war skills don’t really translate into real world opportunities, you know?”

“Doesn’t the VA help?” Buck asks with a frown.

Eddie snorts.

“The wait list for any kind of help is years long,” he says. “America,” he finishes, wryly.

Buck cringes in agreement.

“You should be able to get help with Chris through the state, at least,” Buck offers quietly. “There’s plenty of parents I work with that have food stamps, or housing assistance. Anything that could help make ends meet.”

“I know,” Eddie says, taking a breath, “I need to look into it all, I’ve just been so damn overwhelmed.”

“What about…” Buck starts, before looking over at Chris and stopping. “We can talk about it later,” he finishes instead.

Eddie smiles at him gratefully and goes back to his pizza.

Several hours later, Chris is passed out with his head on Eddie’s lap, splayed between him and Buck on the couch. The closing credits of Aladdin are scrolling on the TV, the radio version of A Whole New World still playing as Buck and Eddie talk.

“His mom isn’t in the picture,” Eddie says to Buck’s unasked question.

“I had wondered,” Buck admits. “Is she…” he trails off.

“Alive and well, last I heard,” Eddie says tightly.

“Kinda shitty she abandoned her kid,” Buck says before he can help himself, wincing as the words come out of his mouth.

“I did it first,” Eddie admits, quietly. “I re-enlisted when we found out about Chris’ CP. I just saw all the hospital bills in the future and I think I panicked. I don’t even remember signing back up. And then I got shot a few months in and had to come home anyway. To a ruined marriage and a baby who didn’t understand why his mom was suddenly gone.”

“You’re married?” Buck asks, in mild horror, making Eddie laugh at that being the thing Buck took from all of that.

“Divorced,” Eddie corrects.

“Sorry,” Buck says, not sounding very sorry at all.

“It’s ok,” Eddie says anyway. “Things are looking up lately.”

“Yeah?” Buck asks, big blue eyes shining in the low light.

Eddie smiles. “Definitely.”

Maddie breezes into her living room a few weeks later, smiling at the familiar sight of Eddie and Chris there with Buck, ostensibly playing with building blocks, but mostly watching Chris knock them down while secretly staring moonily at each other when they think the other isn’t looking.

“You know,” she says to the room at large. “I was a pretty good babysitter to Buck when we were kids.”

Buck looks up at her with amusement.

“You basically raised me, Mads,” he says, “definitely more than a babysitter.”

“Exactly,” Maddie agrees, “so you’d agree that I can keep at least one small boy alive successfully?”

Eddie looks up at that, giving her an amused and inquisitive look.

“If I can be honest right now,” Maddie says, standing with her hands on her hips. “You two are driving me batty with your dancing around each other. Leave Chris with me and go out somewhere where kids aren’t allowed. He’ll have a great time with his Auntie Maddie.”

“Auntie Maddie?” Buck asks with a raised eyebrow.

“Eventually,” Maddie says. “Might as well get used to it now, right?”

She gives them both a pleased grin as she notes the matching blush on their faces.

“You want to hang out with me today, little man?” she asks, moving to crouch down in front of Chris.

In response, Chris throws himself bodily into her arms, snuggling up happily.

“Then it’s decided,” Maddie says, settling down to the floor with Chris still in her lap. “Me and little mister.. whatever your last name is, will have a great night!”

She looks up at Buck for the answer, who freezes goofily when he realizes he doesn’t know, and looks over at Eddie, who just laughs.

“Diaz,” he says. “Buck, I’ve literally handed you my license several times to buy beer.”

Buck ducks his head, blushing again. “I was distracted by your stupid pretty face, shut up.”

Across from them, Maddie laughs and speaks to Chris.

“Daddy and Buck are so silly, aren’t they?”

Chris nods very seriously in response, and Maddie chooses to believe that he understands.

“Subtle,” Eddie says later that night as Buck pulls them up to what is clearly a gay club.

Buck shrugs and gives him an earnest look.

“Figured I’d just jump right in and make sure I wasn’t reading this all wrong and you were really just a super chill straight guy who lets his bisexual best friend lust after him because he’s too nice to reject him.”

Eddie startles at that, looking over at Buck in amusement.

“That is so specific, Buck,” he says.

Buck just shrugs again, looking unsure.

“I am not chill, like at all,” Eddie says, “just so you know.”

“Yeah?” Buck asks, “and what about..”

“And definitely not straight,” Eddie confirms. “So are you gonna unbuckle that seat belt and kiss me, or what?”

“You don’t want to go in first?” Buck says, gesturing toward the club.

Eddie shakes his head. “Maybe another time.”

“Can’t wait,” Buck says, letting himself be pulled awkwardly over the center of the truck and into Eddie’s kiss.

It goes on for what feels like forever, time slow and syrupy in the way that only the best kisses provide. Eddie’s stubble scratches over Buck’s sensitive shaved face and he shivers at the feeling.

“I’m making you all red,” Eddie says as they pull apart, reaching up to soothe Buck’s face with his fingers.

“Worth it,” Buck says without missing a beat, “do it again.”

Eddie’s laugh dies against Buck’s mouth as they kiss again, and there’s not one part of him that minds.

Days turn into weeks and weeks into months, until suddenly they’ve been dating for almost half a year, and Eddie and Chris spend more time at Buck’s than they do at home.

“You know,” Buck says one night as they’re laying in bed, Chris tucked up safely with his Auntie Maddie in the other room. “I’ve been thinking.”

“Dangerous,” Eddie laughs, rubbing his chin over Buck’s head where Buck rests it on his chest like a contented cat.

“Mean,” Buck says, biting the skin of Eddie’s bare chest in retaliation.

“What are you think about?” Eddie asks before they can start actually squabbling.

Buck bites at his chest once more just for good measure before speaking again, avoiding Eddie’s eyes.

“I have like.. a whole bunch of PTO saved up.”

Eddie nods, rubbing up and down Buck’s back in the way that makes him pleasantly tingle. “You wanna go somewhere?” he asks.

“Not exactly,” Buck says. “I just... I know that you’ve been trying to get your medical re-certification, but haven’t had time to do it when your Abuela or Tia could watch Chris.”

“Yeah?” Eddie asks, still confused.

“I was googling it,” Buck continues, “And I definitely have enough PTO to cover the hours you’d need to put in. If you can afford to take the time away from working, obviously.”

“Wait,” Eddie says, smacking Buck’s shoulder until they’re sitting up and facing each other. “You want to what? Use your PTO to babysit my kid so that I can recertify?”

Buck gives Eddie a pleased smile and nods. “Exactly!”

“Why in the world would you waste your paid time off on that?” Eddie asks, with wide eyes. “You should go somewhere fun.”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Buck says, frowning. “And I have plenty of fun with Chris, he’s my favorite little buddy!”

“He’s your only little buddy,” Eddie says, laughing.

“Shut your face,” Buck says, pawing at Eddie’s laughing face dramatically.

Eddie bites at Buck’s palm until he retreats, and then gives him a serious look.

“You’d really use up your time like that for me?”

“Of course I will,” Buck says easily, “I love you and want you to be happy, and have a job that hurts your injuries less.”

Eddie just regards him with wide eyes.

“I haven’t said that out loud before, have I?” Buck asks with a nervous glance.

“I think I would have remembered,” Eddie confirms.

“Well, I do,” Buck says. “love you, I mean. A lot.”

“I’m getting that,” Eddie says, dryly.

“Don’t leave me on read here,” Buck says, grabbing Eddie’s hand in his own and linking their fingers.

“This is a verbal conversation, Buck,” Eddie laughs, squeezing their hands together. “And I love you, too, you dork.”

“Your dork,” Buck says, laying back down and giving Eddie grabby hands until he lays down on Buck’s chest.

“Yeah, yeah,” Eddie says, nosing Buck’s collarbone, before finally agreeing. “You are.”

“How was the first day?” Buck asks as Eddie gets back from his new job.

“It’s pretty cool,” Eddie says, dropping down onto the sofa beside Buck. “Where’s Chris?”

“Maddie took him to the park,” Buck says, “in case I had to leave for work before you got back. I would’ve texted you.”

“I wasn’t worried,” Eddie says, leaning in for a quick kiss, “just curious.”

“So, private ambulance company, huh?” Buck asks, giving in to the urge to plaster himself against Eddie in a koala-like cuddle.

“America,” Eddie says, in that same tone from all those months ago. “But they hired me.”

Buck nods. “And hey,” he says, “you still get to help people, and you have regular hours now, so you’ll get to spend so much more time with Chris.”

“And you,” Eddie says, allowing himself a moment of sappiness.

“And me,” Buck agrees, grinning. “That’s definitely a bonus.”

“I wish we could afford a place together,” Eddie says. “I hate going to bed without you now, you ruined me, you bastard.”

Buck smirks. “I’m not remotely sorry.”

“Neither am I,” Eddie admits, closing his eyes and resting his head back against the couch, finally relaxing.

“You know,” Buck says. “You could always just move in here. We have that little third bedroom that is basically just storage. It’s perfectly Chris-sized for at least a few more years.”

Eddie opens his eyes at that, sitting up and looking over at Buck in surprise.

“Why are you always throwing stuff like this at me when I’m exhausted?” he asks, laughing.

“You’re always exhausted, baby,” Buck says gently. “I’m trying to fix that.”

Eddie looks at him for a long moment, eyes softening with almost unbearable tenderness.

“It’s working,” Eddie says. “Maddie wouldn’t mind?”

Buck shakes his head and gives Eddie a watery grin. “Nah, it was her idea. Three incomes is better than two, and she spends half her time at Chim’s anyway.”

“She planned that park trip, that little menace,” Eddie laughs.

“We are definitely related,” Buck agrees.

“You have the same smile,” Eddie says, thinking back. “That first time at the restaurant? She was teasing you and looked over at me with that big Buckley grin, and I knew she was your sister before she even introduced herself.”

Buck finds himself warmed by the thought.

“We don’t really look alike otherwise, so that’s nice. But you aren’t allowed to fall in love with my sister, you got it?”

Eddie laughs again and wraps his arms tighter around Buck.

“Don’t worry,” he says, “I have all the Buckley I need right here.”

“Damn right,” Buck says. “Now hush and cuddle me for ten more minutes before I go to work.”

Eddie does.

Buck ends up a half an hour late to work, kiss-rumpled and unrepentant. Not even the grumpy old people with too many items can ruin his mood today.

The End

[elysiaheaven]

Hi! I was hoping you could recommend some songs for your Jiaoqiu fic. I wanted to make a playlist in Youtube. If you don't mind!

It was honestly one of the saddest fic I ever read. The entire beheading part was so uncomfortably well-written!

And the sewing part, absolutely was so dark yet sad. Y/n's backstory was so sad. Wanting to travel planets only to be give some-ass background story by some foxian god, who just ruined other lives because he was alone. Only to try to protect the village she really grew to care about to be turned into fucking statues because of a insecure god.

Overall, I honestly don't like female reader, especially the tragic ones. But, This one felt so real with the breakdowns. Really wanted to give a hug for her!

Also, Y/n's character was so beautifully scary. The recipe for Borisin chapter? and then when Jiaoqiu cooked her that. Her reactions were so yandere-scary. It was so thrilling tho! Chapter 1 spooked the hell out of me. I mean those statues descriptions! It was a dream. I was so glad...

Honestly, this y/n was so similar yet a new turn for me Honestly each description felt so real to read.... I def love how your Jiaoqiu version. It showed his serious side more than his playful one. The way you wrote for the few chapters of him being so uncomfortable felt like real..? I was kinda angry at her. But at the same time, Y/n notices them and slowly moves away. yet, only takes action if he starts it.

Moze was so cute in this book. Feixiao was so well too! You made sure to show contrast between Moze's care and Feixiao!

Moze always lurks in the shadows, So he was able to figure out about her being somewhat innocent. I was also glad you didn't show him as a love interest! I mean since y/n was Jiaoqiu's wife... It's a wife reader. So Thank you for that!

Feixiao tried to solve everything, yet kept an eye on you. Felt really happy that you showed how much she cares!

Yunli and Bailu were so cute with y/n!

Honestly, y/n's self deprivation was too relatable for me, I mean the way she cried and the breakdowns felt so real. Maybe I saw myself in this y/n so maybe that's why I didn't hate this one! The way Jiaoqiu/ everyone comforted her was just... Top tier.

The lines- something like- "You really are the goddess of betrayal! You betray your feelings to be useful/ trying to make others happy by giving yourself slowly.." This is entirely y/n's character.. I thought the love was gonna be so rushed, It didn't at all! You actually gave reasons on how he could have loved her before knowing how she was. Not those fics like, 'he only started to love her when he learned who she was'. He really started to care before itself. It was really....

Also Fuck Hoolay? He literally pulled a 'make you suffer down with me'

In all, Thank you! This fic was so wonderful......

Honestly thank you.

Thanking you,

Some person <3

seeing how you like- noticed a lot of things and took time to write such a... message makes me really happy.. The intent of the beheading part was the original ending.. I felt like it would make the fic so much bad and considering after 2.5 Jiaoqiu became such a comfort character for me.. Plus, this y/n grew on me!! I THINK I REALLY DID SOMETHING HUH? I MEAN YOU SAY YOU DONT LIKE FEMALE BUT MINE WAS GOOD?? YAY!!! The breakdowns was easily hard. Had to imagine a lot for those...

Chapter 1 is to scare off people from the fic, since they wont read my garbage.

Hehe the borisin one was to scare too! I really didnt like writing those but haha- my friend was crazy!

About the jiaoqiu version thanks for understanding! i thought ppl will say i made him wrong because he really seems like a serious guy when a threat comes up! thinking both ways. he can act out I loved working on Jiaoqiu’s development, too! I wanted to show how, even though he’s someone who struggles with his feelings, he starts caring for Y/n early on, without it feeling rushed or shallow. It’s not that sudden “I love you because I pity you” trope — his feelings are much deeper, rooted in respect and admiration that grow naturally over time. At least I hope I did!

SAME THOUGHTS THE REASON WHY I EVEN CHOSE HIM AS A SOFTER IN THIS IS BECAUSE OF THAT still he was cold but he didnt show his anger on her because he saw her crying. Feixiao was correct too! Shes a general and would def see if theres so many ways to save jiaoqiu from a spirit! I totally understand the frustration towards her self-deprivation. Writing that aspect of her, where she’s constantly trying to please everyone at her own expense, was painful but necessary to build her character. That line you mentioned, “You really are the goddess of betrayal…,” it was the reason even addressed her as the betrayal goddess I'm really sorry if it made you feel like understanding i get it it must be hard! but pls the entire message was not to sacrifice yourself you are you and theres ppl who love you! I really wanna thank for you this message...

Also yeah! you can make it as a playlist and send me a link once you post it! ill be happy to see...! im glad to see ppl like this...really worked my ass off

and for the songs pls dont be anonymous dm me ill answer u! heeheheh <3

[marvel-ous-m]

20 Questions for Writers!

I was tagged by @devondespresso @pearynice and @spicysix!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

I have 15! 14 in Stranger Things, and one abandoned Marvel fic that I don’t have the strength to admit is really abandoned. 

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

158,993! Over 100,000 of that was in the last 6 months, which is absolutely wild for my lizard brain to comprehend. (Writing, it's free therapy).

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Stranger Things! Like I said above, I used to write for Marvel, but most of my interest in the MCU went out the window after Multiverse of Madness. (Don’t worry, I still love you Spiderman <3) 

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Eddie Munson’s Guide for How to Adopt a Jock in Four Easy Steps

Closer to Fine

Something’s In My Mine (and I’m Focused On You) 

Summer Child

Don’t Cry Over Spilled Tang (Steve Learns to Cry)

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes! As much as I can! I’ve been taking a little impromptu break from comment responses but I loveee getting to interact with comments, it brings so much joy to my life!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I tend to stay pretty firmly in the happy ending cap, but I think that Tonight, Tonight is my saddest/angstiest ending. 

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Oh man, I’m gonna give this to Summer Child (linked above). It was a birthday gift to myself, and even if it’s kinda unrealistic to suddenly have all of Steve’s problems fixed within 2,500 words, I needed some tooth-rotting fluff. 

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I have in the past, but I really don’t in the Stranger Things fandom! 

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Not reallllly. I have quite a few fade to black moments in fics though. I might have some smut in an upcoming fic, but I personally don’t love adding smut to a story focused on plot unless it advances the plot. Just a personal preference thing!! 

10. Do you write crossovers?

No (?)- I’m not opposed, and I seriously LOVE reading Spiderman-Stranger Things crossovers, but I haven’t written anything yet. If inspiration strikes though, I’d be down. 

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of. 

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not that I’m aware of, but I’d totally love this!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

My friend and I had a notebook in middle school that we would pass back and forth and write Supernatural reader insert in-

Uhhhh I mean no. 

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Steddie <3 

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

This award goes to Why Can’t This Be Love (my Marvel fic). Everything else I’ve written that has been posted will be or has been completed!

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think characterization and dialogue are my strengths, with the obvious caveat that my fics tend to be AU or canon divergence, so my characterization is certainly not spot-on to what you see in the show, but I think that I’m good at it for the story that I’m writing. 

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Pacing and descriptors. I definitely have some moments where I’m like “I need to get this over with, this does not need to be so descriptive” but I get attached to the little world I’ve written and struggle to delete whatever is getting in the way. 

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Oooo. Personally I think it depends, but I tend to lean towards no unless you have someone who can speak that language consulting with you. 

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Doctor Who (and I am embarrassed to admit that I wrote it on a typewriter and gave it to my 6th grade teacher to show her I was good at writing). 

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Something’s In My Mind is my favorite child and probably will be for always. I love those funky little guys <3 <3 

Some people I'm challenging! No stress tags, apologies if you've already been tagged and/or have already completed this 20 questions game. (Also if you haven't been tagged but would like to partake, this is your informal invitation to do so!!) @hairstevington @klausinamarink @hellfireloserclub

[gojonanami]

curse!geto is gonna murder all of us 🫣 you guys are gonna love me and hate me at the same time—

this is so ominous <3

is it going to be super sad? because if so, then i am READY

oh it’s gonna be sad — and I love it 🫣🤭

this is probably going to be the saddest fic I ever wrote

[missingn000]

Such a great chapter!✨️

Kenjaku is such a sore loser, like he acts so high and mighty but his plans got foiled by the wettest saddest guy in history. So embarassing for him. I can't imagine living for however long he lived and just staying in the same flop era with same flop goals. So cringe of him...😔

I am placing bets on Yuki vs Choso because I want those two to interact and because I think it would be funny if he betrays Kenjaku the second that fight ends. That man deserved more L's than the world is willing to give him (and the world is already willing to give him a lot of L's).

I love Mahito's dynamic with Hajime!✨️Like two stray cats that should only be adopted together. That car chase was iconic! It's honestly great to see Hajime slowly start to realize that there are things beyond strength. I can't believe Mahito hit a pedestrian...😔 Like, imagine the last thing you see being a green lambo with no driver and a person with cyan hair screaming in the other seat. I would never recover (neither will the random pedestrian).

“Haven’t you ever gone the opposite way on an escalator? Isn't it a fun challenge?”

This fool. “Fuck you! You know I’m scared of escalators!”

“That sounds like a you problem!”

“Of course it is, it’s my fear! That’s a me problem by definition!”

This made me laugh so hard, poor Hajime... being afraid of escalators...

I can't believe they gossiped about Nanami in a treehouse. Like, it's definetly something both of them would do, but I can't imagine Nanami's reaction if he ever finds out about this.

“Well, look what just happened with Sukuna and Suguru-kun,” Mahito says calmly, gesturing vaguely in the direction of the Nanami residence. “Kenjaku’s been scheming for over a thousand years, yet his meticulous goals were thrown off-course by the most depressed man in the universe! Isn’t that so totally hilarious?” 

I love Mahito!✨️ He is so real for this one. Truer words have never been spoken.

“Whatever his plans are, nothing’s gonna go according to them. I wanna be there to watch that” Me too bestie, me too.

I did not expect the emotional conversation but I am so here for it. Sukuna's whole backstory is so in our face, but also not? It feels like watching one of those 1000 pieces puzzles. I know that they all form a cohesive picture, one that he loves to hint at all the time (he really needs some friends to talk to), but I also find it quite difficult to form that picture. Maybe I will make a list of all of the dramatic prejecting his issues on others he does to find it easier.

Mahito cried about Kashimo! I an way too emotionally invested in that interaction, but it was so cute!✨️

Sukuna's high emotional intelligence combined with 0 social skills is so fun to witness. Like, unlike Kenjaku's mysterious ass he is here infodumping about his trauma for free all the tine. King of never shutting up and never keeping things private.

"Water is best as ice" I see you, Sukuna, I see you—

Gojo really did not sign up for getting emotionally damaged by some theatre kid with 1000+ years worth of trauma.

Surprisingly, Sukuna seems genuinely offended. “I am not,” he shoots back. “Anyone who thinks gender correlates to strength deserves to be eaten alive by the gender they think is the weakest.” Progressive king!✨️

Gojo and Suguru are so cute this chapter.💖 Suguru really got a lot of character development (even if he had to lose an arm for it) and I am so happy for him!✨️

Tsumiki is getting a character arc! 🎉

Her argument with Megumi was sad, but also somewhat necessary for her? Like, it's good that she finally expressed her feelings, she needs to do that from time to time, even if yelling at Megumi wasn't realky the best way (even if Megumi was acting a bit like a jerk). At the same time, poor Megumi. He is really going through it right now. Also poor Gojo, it's clear that Sukuna's words affected him.

I'll write more, but I really need to go to sleep. Happy 2 years of writing TPG! 🎊 This fic is honestly one of the best I have ever read!💖

ooh i'm so happy you liked the chapter!! both scenes were really fun to write.

omg you're so right, kenjaku really is a sore loser. deserved. i fucking snorted at "his plans got foiled by the wettest saddest guy in history." so true, getou really fucked everything up for him through depression and character development. GOOD FOR HIM. "same flop era with the same flop goals" i dfghjkl. as for your theory on yuki vs choso...hm...interesting...

you described pfpk SO well, "two stray cats that should only be adopted together." real and accurate. they're so attached, they're like cats who constantly fight but meow like crazy if they're separated (my sister's cat is visiting for the summer, and that's how he is with my cat....) rip the pedestrian, and anyone who saw a car driving itself

i love mahito too! i wanted to give him interesting motives for going along with kjk's plans, since we never really found out in canon. i don't think he bought into the whole curses replacing humans thing, so why did he stay? i think him wanting to watch and study humanity as kenjaku tries to dismantle it fits with his personality.

their emotional convo was fun to write, especially their allusions to sukuna. that's exactly what i'm going for: all the puzzle pieces for sukuna's backstory are there, but missing a few key pieces for it all to make sense. slowly, we'll put things together, but not before making things way more confusing first

SUKUNAAAA MY OVERSHARING BELOVED we stan one zero social skills king. he's so vague but so expressive, and it's so funny and paradoxical of him. he never shuts up, but what he says never has substance.

"Gojo really did not sign up for getting emotionally damaged by some theatre kid with 1000+ years worth of trauma" PLEASE YOU'RE REALLY POPPING OFF WITH THIS MESSAGE gojo did get hit hard by sukuna's scarily accurate depictions of what it's like to be The Strongest. gojo is unsettled by sukuna, but the opposite is also true, which will only worsen as sukuna and gojo learn more about each other.

yeahhh tsumiki!! she deserves a character arc of her own, dammit. i'm so excited to write it! her argument with megumi was so gutting, but she needed to get her feelings out in the open so they can both begin to process and heal. but uh, not before some trauma first.

thank you so much for your kind words and for all your support!!! <333

[ghost-proofbaby]

YOU GOT ME CRYING AT 9 AM ON THE BUS!!!!! ON THE WAY TO WORK!!!! HELPPPP!!! hour 19 was EVERYTHING i’ve ever wantedddd!!!!!😭😭😭😭😭 you’re so fucking talented & i hope you never feel anything but 100% proud of your work. the way you DRAG emotions out of me chapter after chapter. we’re getting closer & closer to the 24th hour & as happy as i am to see how everything turns out in the end..i’m also dreading it!! i’m gonna be the saddest person alive when this is over. thank you for giving us the best fic on this app🥹🥹🥹🥹

i’m also dreading the end truthfully!! it’s just… so insane to see what started as a fun fic for me and my friends to turn into what it has — but isn’t that how most fics go? at least mine do.

i definitely don’t always feel proud, per se, of every chapter. there’s always that bit of stage fright that has me freezing up with every new chapter. but you guys are just.. so kind, so giving, that sometimes i do sit back and go “huh… maybe it isn’t the worst thing ever produced.”

thank you endlessly for that <3

[hydrasquadd]

Hey I just want to go off about crazy fictive shenanigans for a minute

Paragraph below ⇓

I kinda want to journal my thoughts a little bit here

If you've been following me, you know we just got a new fictive (the first in years). Danny.

And first of all, can I say how different it is to split a fictive then it is to split a regular alter, damn dude. Guy took us all for a loop. We definitely forgot how to deal with it and react appropriately (it's more important than you'd think). And the saddest part is, I'm not even surprised we split again because of all the shit happening in America right now. And also can someone tell me why fictives are way more likely to become hosts. Why. (Actually I might know why) But still- HELLO??? Might just be my system and trauma symptoms like 'b8' (I don't know what the hell it's actually called it has a real name I swear)

That's all beside the point (mostly)

So I'm just gonna say, from the first time we saw DP fanarts I just knew, that guy's gonna become an alter. But the thing is I couldn't for the life of me find the actual show for forever. Until now, bought a whole month of paramount plus for this.

(The immediate way we can tell a new fictive has formed is if the b8 goes off. Essentially, every time a (fictive) character gets hurt (in source or fanarts or something), we literally feel it. It's a whole science thing about childhood trauma and how being in stress as a child made stress/pain later in life feel good. (We've named it b8, it's a very long story.) It's wack as fuck and made this system absolutely unhinged. (See HSS). So when that kid got slammed into a wall for the 6th time in a row and I felt it, we knew it was about to get good. The second way is when everything is unfamiliar and I have no idea where I am. But that's more depressing than I'd like so we'll just go with b8.)

So now, suddenly Danny. He's here (and may or may not be queer). And since our dumbasses didn't have a new fictive in years, we just went off on him (excited). And it went to shit fast.

During this time, we also started looking at fanfic. (Ok first of all, I sorta know the answer to this question but I also don't. What is the deal with batman. Why, when I'm looking for DP fanfics on AO3, I have to filter out BATMAN!??? Ok sorry rant over) So while the fanfics did NOT help the situation, it did something to the homesickness. So that was sorta a positive. But what came out of it, is the most chaotic shit I've ever seen.

So APPARENTLY, when a kid is suddenly dropped into a whole new body and world, it's kinda stressful. And a bunch of chaotic guys are suddenly surrounding you and (for lack of a better term,) harassing you, that doesn't help. So poor kid went into a state of shock. It was homesickness, it was where the fuck am I, it was what is going on, it was everything. At once. It also didn't help that he was still kinda forming. It got to the point where if any of us even said his name, it would be a wave of negative emotion. (See post about entire system breaking down)

Remember when I said Danny was still forming at this point, well, he took after a fic.

Chained (you should read it if you're into DP)

Short version: it's very angsty, and Danny sorta turns evil at the end.

So guess fucking what.

He sucked that evil right up

And now, we have two. Two Dannys. But they're in the same body (Headspace). It's the closest we've gotten to a subsystem. And the best part, after going on an evil rampage through Nogard (headspace world), that's what got him out of his shell. So now it's Danny AND Phantom.

The origins of this fucking gem

All of that negative emotion from before just- boom. Gone. And honestly.

I think that's just the utter insanity that this system is known for.

So now he's a host. He fronts a lot now, which is good. (I think) Which is also funny because his energy is very similar to the other hosts.

But also it's nice because he's bonding with our mom a lot. I think it's sweet. And it's good because said mom is NOT used to us talking to them that much.

So to wrap this up, we're doing good now. Somehow we've got ourselves a cringe little good/evil child running around. I don't think I could have ever predicted that, but honestly, I wouldn't wish for anything different.

(One last thing! He wants me to say thanks again to Kasa for helping in the 'what the fuck is happening' phase. It was so... /Pos)

Go follow Danny

@lonelycouncilphantom

[strapinandstraponyourstrapons]

hm, can u tell me about 3 7 and 9, please???? 🥹

of course my lovely friend!🔥🖤🔥

3. Ah, you've stumbled upon one of the completed ones, and it's "i lost my heart under the bridge" 😂🖤

i always think of titles when i'm finished based on song lyrics that i think fit it. while i'm still working on it, i save it with a placeholder title that is usually a dumb meme or literally whatever song lyrics are in my head. while i was starting this one about tara dying, i was thinking, what should i call it? and then i heard the grimes song shinigami eyes immediately start playing in my head and i was like "...this is NOT funny. this is the saddest shit i've ever written in my life. you stfu with your memey ass bullshit" and then i typed "are you ready to die got my shinigami eyes on" in the title bar bc at least i'm gonna know what it means🤣

i'm so sorry to tara raeken. but she'd enjoy grimes, i know it

7. genuinely just an ideas doc for later, with things i might work into future fics. this one i really like:

"Thiam are standing with their usual lack of respect for personal space while arguing about the plan. Stiles and Mason are standing nearby, with Stiles stroking his chin and narrowing his eyes at the other two. He leans in to Mason. “It’s like… do they need to be three inches apart for that conversation?” Mason sighs deeply. “You have no idea what I’ve been going through.”"

(i also have a fun idea about theo and stiles investigating a new guy in town who seems sus and they think might be a hunter, and it's a real bonding experience for them, but when they find out it's liam's bio dad things get... less fun)

9. woowee i haven't updated this doc much since like January and there's a lot i would change but this i stand by:

"Jenna - maybe Jenna is like admin at a kindergarten or something and still hasn’t decided what she wants to do with her life at almost 50. I kinda love that for her. She would just have a million hobbies and special interests. Definitely a painter. Probably takes random classes and gets Theo to drive her."

[teddyarabellapicker]

The View From… The Top Bunk

Alex Turner x reader

Summary: You're on tour with the band and (Humbug!) Alex gets you alone on the bus while the rest of the band are out.

warnings: smut, cringey jokes from Matt, Nick, and Jamie

word count: 3.2k

-written for @indiee19 and her imagines book on wattpad, the fic is also up on her page ❤️

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The sound of the boys shuffling around the bus and chattering woke you up. You tried to nuzzle your head back into Alex's neck, but he wasn't there. You opened your eyes, seeing that Alex wasn't squeezed into the bunk with you. You groaned and forced yourself out of the bunk, eyes adjusting to the sudden ray of light that came through the windows.

You dug into yours and Alex's bag, grabbing one of his shirts and you walked to the bathroom, rubbing your eyes to try and help wake you up. Once you got there, you went in and brushed your hair and teeth, making yourself somewhat presentable, putting the shirt on over your bra that you slept in.

You used a hair tie on your wrist to tie it up so it didn't go past your shorts. You checked yourself in the mirror one last time and then walked out, turning off the light and walking to the small lounge at the back of the bus, seeing Alex and the rest of the band sitting on the sofa.

"Ahh, so the beast has awoken and come out of its cave," Matt said, eliciting a laugh from everyone.

"Fuck off, Matt," you said, still tired and half asleep. You walked over to Alex, sitting beside him and nuzzling your head into his neck, cuddling up to him and Alex wrapped his arms around you, holding you close, and lifted you chin so that he could kiss you. You could taste the last cigarette he had before you woke and you smelled his spicy cologne that you bought him for his birthday.

"Oh, no, we better leave before they start shagging," Jamie said, making a disgust face. You and Alex both held up your middle fingers at him, Nick and Matt laughing. Alex pulled away and you nuzzled back into Alex's neck, closing your eyes.

"You alright, princess?" Alex asked, kissing the top of your head.

"Yeah, just ... just a little tired," you said and yawned immediately after making Alex 'aww' in his head. You drifted off into your own world, not paying attention to anyone or what they were saying.

All you knew was that they were talking about what songs they would play on their set list for the gig later. You heard them say something about playing 'When the sun goes down,' 'Brianstorm,' and 'Teddy Picker' but that was about all you heard.

Thirty minutes went by and then the boys got up, including Alex, making you finally open your eyes when your head fell without his shoulder holding your head up.

"Where are you guys going?" you asked, sitting up completely.

"Oh, we're going to the sound check," Alex said, scratching the back of his neck. "Do you want to come?"

"Sure, just let me get properly dressed," you said and got up and went to yours and Alex's bag.

"Okay, we'll be outside, love," Alex said, walking outside with the rest of the band.

You reached the part of the bus where your bag was, reaching in it, grabbing some denim shorts and a t-shirt, putting on some shoes and the you walked outside, walking up behind Alex and scaring him. Matt, Nick, and Jamie laughed, Alex on the other hand, did not.

"Not funny," he said.

"Oh, come on, pull the stick out of your ass, it was funny and you know it," you replied, kissing him, making him smile, no longer being slightly mad.

"Okay, you're right. It was funny, princess," he said quietly, wrapping an arm around you, pulling you closer to his side. "We ready to go?" Alex asked the band.

"Yeah, Al. Let me go get Mark," Matt said, quickly telling Mark to come on and Mark grabbed his camera. You all got in the car, just barley enough room for all six of you. You were in between Alex and Jamie, Alex's fingers intertwined with your own. Jamie glanced over to you two and jokingly rolled his eyes and scoffed.

"You two better not snog in front of me," he joked. You and Alex laughed and Alex gave you a quick peck on the lips. Jamie made an over exaggerated disgusted face when Alex peppered your face with kisses, your lips, cheeks and forehead and everyone else laughed.

Alex stopped kissing you and laid his head down on your shoulder. "I love you, princess," he whispered, placing a chaste kiss to your jaw. You rested your head on top of his and you both sat in silence as everyone else talked the entire way there.

Once the car came to a halt at the venue they were playing at, everyone got out, Alex's hands grabbing yours and intertwining his fingers with yours, always desperate to touch you, whether it was by holding hand or laying beside you, he always liked to have some sort of physical contact with you.

You all walked into the venue they were playing at and you sat backstage while they did their sound check. Every now and then during the sound check Alex would look at you and when he stopped singing, he would blow you a kiss.

Even though it was their sound check, they still sounded amazing. Mark was filming them, no doubt for another installment of 'The View From...' videos that Matt was quite fond of doing and were also very fun to film. You laughed when Alex walked over to Jamie and did what you would describe as 'guitar fucking' where Alex was standing over Jamie and played their guitars and made weird faces at each other.

You were kind of sad whenever the sound check ended but you were also happy that you could kiss Alex finally. As soon as he sat down his guitar, he kissed you, his slightly chapped lips moving against your own.

Matt tapped on Alex's shoulder. "Okay, lovebirds, that's enough," he said. You and Alex pulled apart.

"Just because you're sad and single doesn't mean that you have to project onto us, Matt," Alex laughed. You couldn't help but laugh as well, Nick and Jamie joining in.

The show didn't start for another four hours so you all decided to play some games - throw the lime down the corridor, cards, but mostly throw the lime down the corridor, that made the hours go by fast.

You hadn't realized how close the time was to when the show was supposed to begin, after a while of playing the game, Alex grabbed you and pulled you into his dressing room.

"Alex,"  you squealed. He pushed you against the wall and instantly started kissing you, his hands traveling up your body to fondle your breasts through the material of your shirt and bra.

"Alex, stop, you have to be on stage in a few minutes," you said, pushing him away. You immediately missed the feeling of his lips against yours, but you didn't want to be the reason that he wasn't on stage in time.

He sighed and stepped back, grabbing the clothes he was going to perform in, quickly changing all the while you were watching him. Once he finished changing he ran his fingers through his hair, styling it in the mirror. You were jealous of how incredibly good his hair always looked, jealous of how soft and shiny and smooth it was, and how it rarely ever got tangled. His hair was better than yours could ever be, but you didn't mind because he was perfect.

"Do I look good, love?" Alex asked when he noticed you starring at him, chuckling lightly.

"You always look good, Al," you replied, Alex blushed at your compliment, always being an adorable, shy boy.

"Al, come on. We have to go on stage!" Matt yelled from outside his dressing room. You and Alex walked out, hand in hand. Alex grabbed his guitar and kissed you before going up on stage with everyone else.

Just like always, their show was amazing. The way Matt played the drums that made the songs, Alex's absolutely amazing vocals as well as Matt and Nick's backing vocals and Jamie occasionally messing up the cords, but still doing amazing. You couldn't help but sing along sometimes, though your voice didn't compare to Alex's whatsoever.

Your favourite song they played that night though was Do Me A Favour, though you were confused whenever Alex laughed during the saddest part of the song, but the confusion quickly went away when the drums and guitar kicked in.

Though you enjoyed the sound check, you enjoyed the show even more, and you loved the confidence that they all radiated, acting like the coolest people in the world, because they were. You loved hearing the crowd cheer for them - and you also loved the girls yelling at Alex.

"I love you, Alex!"

"You're amazing!"

"You're a fucking amazing singer!"

"Alright, everybody, it's time for us to go. We're gonna leave you with this one," Alex said, seeming sad himself. They started playing D Is For Dangerous, and you were glad they did, it was one of your favourite songs after all.

You got so into the song that you forgot that it was their last song of the night and you were sad whenever they stopped and said goodbye to the crowd. They all walked off stage, leaving their instruments on stage for the next night when they would be performing again.

You stood up and walked over to Alex, his face immediately lighting up when he saw you, grabbing your waist, kissing your temple.

"Did you enjoy the show, princess?" he asked. You nodded and told him that you absolutely loved it and couldn't wait for tomorrow nights show, certain that it would be even better than this one.

You saw the guys talking and wondered what they were talking about. They then walked over to you and Alex.

"So, we're going to out and eat, you guys wanna come?" Nick asked.

"Yeah, or do you guys want to go back to the bus all by yourselves?" Jamie added, him and Matt laughing. You rolled your eyes and Alex looked at you, then back at the guys.

"Nah, I think we'll go," he said, grabbing your hand, walking you to his dressing room to change, the rest of the guys doing the same. Alex wore the blue button up that you'd bought him for his birthday, he wore it every chance he got, it only being special because you had bought it and not anyone else. He quickly stepped into his black jeans and tugged them up, buttoning and zipping them.

You were on your phone most of the time, responding to messages from friends and family who were asking about the show. Alex saying your name snapped you out of your daze and you looked up at him, seeing his adorable, lazy grin that he only did when he was alone with you, not wanting to show it in public in fear of breaking his 'bad boy' persona that he had.

"You're so cute," you smiled, laughing when he made a weird face at you. You wished that he showed his playful and goofy side in public, you thought that his persona wasn't truthful to who he actually was - a shy, quiet, socially awkward, playful romantic boy.

"You ready?" Alex asked, holding his hand out for you to grab. You took his hand and he helped you stand up, grabbing his bag that had the clothes he performed in and you both walked out, leaving the building entirely, seeing the guys waiting for you two.

"You guys ready?" Matt asked, leaning on the car, Nick and Jamie getting in it along with Mark in the very back, Jamie sitting where he sat on the way to the venue.

"Yeah," you said. You and Alex then got into the car, sitting in the same spots as before, you in between Alex and Jamie, Alex beside the window.

The drive was full of singing, shitty jokes, and occasionally sneaky kisses between you and Alex. Nick and Jamie ended up arguing about witch soccer team was better and it was fairly funny, Matt even joined in. You couldn't help but laugh when they tried to bring Alex into the argument, though he quickly stopped that, saying that he didn't have a say in it.

You layed your head down on Alex's shoulder for the rest of the drive, holding hands, tuning out the stupid argument going on between the rest of the boys.

The car came to a halt at a restaurant, everyone getting out and walking inside, stopping in the entryway for the band to take a picture with a fan of theirs. You all then walked over to a podium where a waitress was standing.

"How many?" they asked, getting ready to pick up some menus.

"Uh ... six," Matt said, stopping for a moment to count up all of you.

"Okay, right this way," they said, picking up six menus, leading you all to a round table where you all took your seats. The seat beside you was empty, Alex sitting on the other side. The waitress left and soon after another waiter came to take your drink orders, bringing them out not long after.

It was a few more minutes until you all had decided what you were going to order and the waiter was quick to come back and take your orders, rushing it to the kitchen.

The boys somehow got back onto their argument on soccer, their bickering amusing, it was like they were children arguing about what superhero was the best which made it all the more better.

They seemed to be too into the argument to notice that Alex was now much closer to you, his hand rubbing up and down your thigh, brushing dangerously close to your clothed clit. You quickly grabbed his hand, reminding him that you were in public. He didn't seem to care though, continuing to rub your thigh, lightly brushing against your clit through the material of your shorts. You held back a gasp and grabbed his hand, pulling it away from you.

He glared at you, grabbing your hand, kissing it. You all talked until your food arrived at the table, though that didn't stop Alex from teasing you again. Whenever the guys were looking away from you two he would whisper dirty things in your ear.

"I can't wait till we get back to the bus."

"You look so hot right now, princess."

You knew that this was either him being horny as always, or it was his gig high that he hadn't shaken off yet. Your second thought was confirmed when he went back to rubbing you thigh, never wanting to do something like this in public, whispering in your ear. "When we get back to the bus, I'm going to fuck you up." That was it, you were gone, couldn't handle his teasing any longer.

"Please, Alex," you said quietly, begging him with your eyes. "As you wish, princess," he said, taking his hand off your thigh. "Hey, guys, I think we're gonna head back to the bus, she's not feeling really well," Alex lied, you playing along.

"Oh, okay, hope you feel better, love," Matt said, drinking his beer. "Thanks, Matt," you said softly, acting as if you were actually not well. You and Alex said your goodbyes to Jamie, Nick, and Mark and then left the restaurant, rushing to get to the bus.

You were both very eagar, more than  you could've ever remembered, the ten minute walk taking a little less than five when you began to hurriedly get there, pushing past people so you could get there faster.

As soon as you both reached the bus and got in, Alex pushed you against the wall, attaching his slightly chapped lips to yours, moving in sync with one another. He bit down on your bottom lip, demanding entrance and you complied, his tongue easily fighting yours into submission. He was quick to rid you of your shirt, working on getting your pants off.

Once he rid you of your pants, leaving you in your bra and panties, he grabbed the underside of your thighs, signaling for you to jump, to which you did. He carried you to your shared bunk with him. You shuffled out of the rest of your garments before crawling into the top bunk, watching as Alex took off his own clothes, crawling in and laying over you, closing the curtain.

He wasn't in the mood to tease you anymore, too far gone just like yourself. He was quick to give his thick cock a few tugs before he nestled himself between your legs, slowly pushing in, head falling down on your shoulder when he bottomed out, the feeling of your walls stretching to fit his size too much for him.

He let you adjust to his size before starting to move, going slowly, setting a pace of his own liking, though it didn't last long, he couldn't take it anymore, his need to hear you moan for him growing immensely. And it didn't take long before you were a moaning mess for him, fingers knotting in his precious hair that you loved so much.

He began to place wet kisses on your neck, one of his hands coming in between your bodies to rub vigorously on your clit, his other hand the only thing holding all of his weight off of you. You knew that it wouldn't be long until you came undone, his thrusts getting faster and faster, but at the same time sloppier and it was obvious that he wasn't very far off either.

"A-Alex, I'm so close," you whimpered, voice trailing off into a moan as Alex had delivered a particularly hard thrust, hitting the spongey spot that made you see stars.

"Come for me, princess," he said, delivering one more hard thrust, flicking your clit, sending you over the edge, your own orgasm triggering Alex's, his hips stilling, his hot release spurting inside you.

His support arm gave out and he collapsed on top of you, panting heavily.

"God, I love you," he panted, the both of you coming down from your highs. "I love you too, Al," you responded.

All of a sudden, you heard the bus door open and heard Matt yell yours and Alex's name. You heard him walk over to the bunk and opened the curtain, quickly closing it when  he saw you both.

"God, Al, you could've given me a warning," Matt said, walking away. "Jamie, Nick, don't look in their bunk. Trust me, you'll regret it," you heard Matt say in the small lounge room and Nick and Jamie's laughter echoed through the bus.

"Sorry," Alex yelled, pulling out of you with a sigh, the two of you shuffling so that you both could sleep comfortably in the very small bunk. "Goodnight, princess, I love you.

"I love you too, Al."

[virtualcarrot]

GO Human!AU Flower shop Delivery relay not!fic...

...that nobody asked for, yadda yadda

A stream of consciousness not!fic I inflicted on @goodduckingomens​, and attempted to give a readable shape to so less practiced souls could still understand it.

*

Human!AU Crowley has a flower shop. A fandom classic, right? only well, it's not like flower shops are particularly in vogue, so he also doubles as a delivery relay point. Due to a misunderstanding with that blasted internet, Aziraphale messes up an order and gets it delivered to the nearest relay point.

On that morning, Crowley gets a smushed cardboard box, but by the time he notices and yells after the infernal delivery men, the small lorry's already left the curb. He shrugs, grumbles, and gets back to business.

When a strangely dressed man steps into his shop, his first reaction is to assume he’s finally found a spender.  Oh ho ho, he thinks, a flower customer if I’ve ever seen one. This one's gonna get a bouquet!.

And indeed, the customer's all Oooh and Aaaah at the flowers. Crowley's doing his best schmoozing, hoping to push for a sale, except, to his surprise (and not quite an unpleasant one, even), far from being a pushover, the guy politely - but firmly - declines. He's here to pick a delivery, he says.

It's the smushed box. The man looks offended, until Crowley lifts his hands defensively--"not me, that's how i got it"--and then he becomes crestfallen.

"You can decline it," Crowley reminds helpfully.

"Oh, no, I wouldn't want to be a bother..." the man says, wringing his hands and giving the saddest eyes to the crumpled box.

"Not being a bother, that, s’just customer rights, innit?"

The man visibly steels himself out of his disappointment, ready to soldier through. Seems a bit of a shame to Crowley, all that stiff upper lip nonsense, but what can you do. Still, he can’t help but suggest:

"How about you open the box here, hm? then I can be a witness. Don't worry, whatever's inside, I won't judge. I've seen things." He gives an encouraging smile.

The man smiles back, a bit distractedly. "Oh, so have I, we do live in Soho."

Crowley watches him start to pull on the tape keeping the cardboard closed and hums. "You should take a picture before, though. Proof of the state of the parcel and all."

Bringing his attention back to Crowley, the man shakes his head. "I'm afraid I didn't take a camera with me."

"I'm sure your phone... will do?"

The mere idea seems to baffle his weird customer, who blinks at him in silence. "My--? Oh! Oh, no, I don't have any of those portable phones, I'm afraid."

Which is how Crowley finds himself taking a picture of the parcel for his customer on his own cell phone, and obtaining the man's email to forward it to.

The content of the box turns out bruised too (and the eyes turn so sad at the sight that Crowley feels the urge to pat his arm; he doesn't act on it) but the customer gets a glint in his eyes that speaks of enjoying a good challenge.

"Well, it was supposed to be a restoration project after all. Still I'm very glad for the picture, dear boy, because this still warrants a very stern talking to."

And doesn’t that paint quite the picture.

Seeing as the man’s about to leave, Crowley can't help but weakly call out: "So, no flowers?"

Parcel under his arm, the man turns to him, raises an eyebrow. "I'm afraid not, though they're very lovely. Thank you for the help."

*

It could have stayed at that.

Only. Only, even when Aziraphale manages to order things to his actual bookshop, the local delivery men appear to have decided to simply drop his parcels at the relay point, blaming the bookshop's opening hours. "How were we to know there was someone eh?"

(Incidentally, the delivery men are Hastur and Ligur)

And so Crowley starts seeing more of him.

And every single time, Aziraphale refuses to buy any plants. Aziraphale, who is a very frugal (CHEAP) frugal person for anything he hasn't ascertained DESERVES spending into, like food or clothes or books.

It becomes a game between them.

Eventually he buys the cheapest potted plant in the shop. He kills it in 2 weeks. Following that, he may or may not storm the flower shop to not-so-seriously complain about the quality of the plants. Crowley is at once baffled, offended and extremely entertained by the utter bad faith arguments of the man. Who, it turns out, drowned his plant because: "Well, aren't they supposed to need water?!"

After that, Crowley starts recommending plants Aziraphale could manage (Aziraphale who, by that time, decides spending at the flower shop is an acceptable endeavor). And, since the bookshop is so close by, and because he's a PROFESSIONAL, Crowley also drops by the bookshop to see how attempt 14 is doing in the dusty, badly lit environment.

Crowley also sends plant memes to Aziraphale's email.

(“This is a professional address Crowley!”

“That excuse might have worked if you also had a personal one.”)

*

Hastur and Ligur's terrible delivery ethics cause Aziraphale a world of grief on the day he orders a gift (“It's not a gift, Tracy, I'm just... showing my appreciation of his efforts to help me keep a plant alive, stop smirking at me dear, it's unbecoming”) for Crowley and the delivery duo drop it at the flower shop.

Which means he has to go pick it up. And no matter how much he reminds himself that the parcel hides what it contains, and Think of it as an espionage mission, old chap, well, Aziraphale is a terrible actor. Crowley picks on his nerves the instant he steps inside the flower shop. Like a shark at the scent of blood, his attention narrows in on his friend. He foists whatever customer he was busy with onto his assistant Newt, just so he's free to make his way to Aziraphale.

''Hellooooo Aziraphaaaale.''

Aziraphale sends him a look of sheer distrust. ''Fiend.''

''Sooooo, I see we have a parcel for you today, hmmmm?"

Aziraphale squirms more and more. Which is a delight because he has the best reactions.

Though Crowley quickly tones the teasing down a bit, because Aziraphale doesn't give back as much as he usually does, and his squirming is dangerously close to distress.

Still, he can't help one last gentle jab when he slides the parcel over the counter.

"I thought you'd seen everything Soho has to offer. What's all this about then?"

"I don't... what- The nerve! Of asking! What right have you- I don't answer to y-!"

Aziraphale keeps sputtering in indignation all the way out of the shop. Crowley watches him go, for the first time understanding the meaning of the word befuddled.

"Well, that was a thing."

(the gift is a vintage astrolabe, and when Aziraphale finally gathers the nerve to give it to Crowley weeks later, Crowley is too overcome with emotion to pick on the opportunity for some well-spirited ribbing. They’re both emotional and terrible at being emotional and deserve each other)

*

One of the first plants Aziraphale manages to keep alive for a noticeable amount of time is basil. Until, high on his success, he almost kills it straight away by taking too many leaves to cook a dish. While he wrings his hands in distress and lets out small oh dears, Crowley takes note of the plant with no small amount of dismay.

Aziraphale hovers anxiously. "Can you save it?"

"Nothing to do but wait, angel. Give it a break, make sure the soil doesn't dry, leave it by your cleanest window for some actual sunlight and let it rest."

"Oh dear, are you sure there's nothing els-"

"Nope. Rest." And then, to make sure Aziraphale doesn't fuss the poor plant to death, he steers him by the shoulders--and uh, they do feel pleasantly full and wide under his hands--to the bookshop entrance. "Let's get dinner, eh?"

The basil survives. Aziraphale buys two other pots so he can alternate their use in the kitchen.

*

Turns out, the plants Aziraphale gets best along with are the d r a m a t i c ones. The ones who'll droop and swoon and crawl the moment they feel a hint of thirst, significantly enough that even Aziraphale's distracted self will take notice, but also who'll sit up straight a few hours after being watered, giving Aziraphale the satisfaction of a job well done. Making him feel like he matters. Like his pampering is well received.

Anathema, a bookshop regular, once takes one look at a droopy peace lily, then at the club armchair Crowley’s dropped himself into, bemoaning the horrors of customer service, and says "Guess Mr Fell has a type, eh?"

[indiee19]

The View From... The Top Bunk

Alex Turner x reader

Summary: You're on tour with the band and (Humbug!) Alex gets you alone on the bus while the rest of the band are out.

warnings: smut, cringey jokes from Matt, Nick, And Jamie.

word count: 3.2k

-This part was wrote by the co-writer and my best friend, Thea, so thank you @teddyarabellapicker. the fic is also up on her page, so be sure to check her out

A/n: sorry for not uploading in a few days, I've just been writing a new story inspired by the Everything You've Come To Expect album. Also, I'm making a tag list, so lmk if you want to be added to it. Enjoy.

✿✼:*ﾟ:༅｡.｡༅:*･ﾟﾟ･⭑ ✿✼:*ﾟ:༅｡.｡༅:*･ﾟﾟ･⭑

The sound of the boys shuffling around the bus and chattering woke you up. You tried to nuzzle your head back into Alex's neck, but he wasn't there. You opened your eyes, seeing that Alex wasn't squeezed into the bunk with you. You groaned and forced yourself out of the bunk, eyes adjusting to the sudden ray of light that came through the windows.

You dug into yours and Alex's bag, grabbing one of his shirts and you walked to the bathroom, rubbing your eyes to try and help wake you up. Once you got there, you went in and brushed your hair and teeth, making yourself somewhat presentable, putting the shirt on over your bra that you slept in.

You used a hair tie on your wrist to tie it up so it didn't go past your shorts. You checked yourself in the mirror one last time and then walked out, turning off the light and walking to the small lounge at the back of the bus, seeing Alex and the rest of the band sitting on the sofa.

"Ahh, so the beast has awoken and come out of their cave," Matt said, eliciting a laugh from everyone.

"Fuck off, Matt," you said, still tired and half asleep. You walked over to Alex, sitting beside him and nuzzling your head into his neck, cuddling up to him and Alex wrapped his arms around you, holding you close, and lifted you chin so that he could kiss you. You could taste the last cigarette he had before you woke and you smelled his spicy cologne that you bought him for his birthday.

"Oh, no, we better leave before they start shagging," Jamie said, making a disgust face. You and Alex both held up your middle fingers at him, Nick and Matt laughing. Alex pulled away and you nuzzled back into Alex's neck, closing your eyes.

"You alright, princess?" Alex asked, kissing the top of your head.

"Yeah, just ... just a little tired," you said and yawned immediately after making Alex 'aww' in his head. You drifted off into your own world, not paying attention to anyone or what they were saying.

All you knew was that they were talking about what songs they would play on their set list for the gig later. You heard them say something about playing 'When the sun goes down,' 'Brianstorm,' and 'Teddy Picker' but that was about all you heard.

Thirty minutes went by and then the boys got up, including Alex, making you finally open your eyes when your head fell without his shoulder holding your head up.

"Where are you guys going?" you asked, sitting up completely.

"Oh, we're going to the sound check," Alex said, scratching the back of his neck. "Do you want to come?"

"Sure, just let me get properly dressed," you said and got up and went to yours and Alex's bag.

"Okay, we'll be outside, love,” Alex said, walking outside with the rest of the band.

You reached the part of the bus where your bag was, reaching in it, grabbing some denim shorts and a t-shirt, putting on some shoes and the you walked outside, walking up behind Alex and scaring him. Matt, Nick, and Jamie laughed, Alex on the other hand, did not.

"Not funny," he said.

"Oh, come on, pull the stick out of your ass, it was funny and you know it," you replied, kissing him, making him smile, no longer being slightly mad.

"Okay, you're right. It was funny, princess," he said quietly, wrapping an arm around you, pulling you closer to his side. "We ready to go?" Alex asked the band.

"Yeah, Al. Let me go get Mark," Matt said, quickly telling Mark to come on and Mark grabbed his camera. You all got in the car, just barley enough room for all six of you. You were in between Alex and Jamie, Alex's fingers intertwined with your own. Jamie glanced over to you two and jokingly rolled his eyes and scoffed.

"You two better not snog in front of me," he joked. You and Alex laughed and Alex gave you a quick peck on the lips. Jamie made an over exaggerated disgusted face when Alex peppered your face with kisses, your lips, cheeks and forehead and everyone else laughed.

Alex stopped kissing you and laid his head down on your shoulder. "I love you, princess," he whispered, placing a chaste kiss to your jaw. You rested your head on top of his and you both sat in silence as everyone else talked the entire way there.

Once the car came to a halt at the venue they were playing at, everyone got out, Alex's hands grabbing yours and intertwining his fingers with yours, always desperate to touch you, whether it was by holding hand or laying beside you, he always liked to have some sort of physical contact with you.

You all walked into the venue they were playing at and you sat backstage while they did their sound check. Every now and then during the sound check Alex would look at you and when he stopped singing, he would blow you a kiss.

Even though it was their sound check, they still sounded amazing. Mark was filming them, no doubt for another installment of 'The View From...' videos that Matt was quite fond of doing and were also very fun to film. You laughed when Alex walked over to Jamie and did what you would describe as 'guitar fucking' where Alex was standing over Jamie and played their guitars and made weird faces at each other.

You were kind of sad whenever the sound check ended but you were also happy that you could kiss Alex finally. As soon as he sat down his guitar, he kissed you, his slightly chapped lips moving against your own.

Matt tapped on Alex's shoulder. "Okay, lovebirds, that's enough," he said. You and Alex pulled apart.

"Just because you're sad and single doesn't mean that you have to project onto us, Matt," Alex laughed. You couldn't help but laugh as well, Nick and Jamie joining in.

The show didn't start for another four hours so you all decided to play some games - throw the lime down the corridor, cards, but mostly throw the lime down the corridor, that made the hours go by fast.

You hadn't realized how close the time was to when the show was supposed to begin, after a while of playing the game, Alex grabbed you and pulled you into his dressing room.

"Alex,"  you squealed. He pushed you against the wall and instantly started kissing you, his hands traveling up your body to fondle your breasts through the material of your shirt and bra.

"Alex, stop, you have to be on stage in a few minutes," you said, pushing him away. You immediately missed the feeling of his lips against yours, but you didn't want to be the reason that he wasn't on stage in time.

He sighed and stepped back, grabbing the clothes he was going to perform in, quickly changing all the while you were watching him. Once he finished changing he ran his fingers through his hair, styling it in the mirror. You were jealous of how incredibly good his hair always looked, jealous of how soft and shiny and smooth it was, and how it rarely ever got tangled. His hair was better than yours could ever be, but you didn't mind because he was perfect.

"Do I look good, love?" Alex asked when he noticed you starring at him, chuckling lightly.

"You always look good, Al," you replied, Alex blushed at your compliment, always being an adorable, shy boy.

"Al, come on. We have to go on stage!" Matt yelled from outside his dressing room. You and Alex walked out, hand in hand. Alex grabbed his guitar and kissed you before going up on stage with everyone else.

Just like always, their show was amazing. The way Matt played the drums that made the songs, Alex's absolutely amazing vocals as well as Matt and Nick's backing vocals and Jamie occasionally messing up the cords, but still doing amazing. You couldn't help but sing along sometimes, though your voice didn't compare to Alex's whatsoever.

Your favourite song they played that night though was Do Me A Favour, though you were confused whenever Alex laughed during the saddest part of the song, but the confusion quickly went away when the drums and guitar kicked in.

Though you enjoyed the sound check, you enjoyed the show even more, and you loved the confidence that they all radiated, acting like the coolest people in the world, because they were. You loved hearing the crowd cheer for them - and you also loved the girls yelling at Alex.

"I love you, Alex!"

"You're amazing!"

"You're a fucking amazing singer!"

"Alright, everybody, it's time for us to go. We're gonna leave you with this one," Alex said, seeming sad himself. They started playing D Is For Dangerous, and you were glad they did, it was one of your favourite songs after all.

You got so into the song that you forgot that it was their last song of the night and you were sad whenever they stopped and said goodbye to the crowd. They all walked off stage, leaving their instruments on stage for the next night when they would be performing again.

You stood up and walked over to Alex, his face immediately lighting up when he saw you, grabbing your waist, kissing your temple.

"Did you enjoy the show, princess?" he asked. You nodded and told him that you absolutely loved it and couldn't wait for tomorrow nights show, certain that it would be even better than this one.

You saw the guys talking and wondered what they were talking about. They then walked over to you and Alex.

"So, we're going to out and eat, you guys wanna come?" Nick asked.

"Yeah, or do you guys want to go back to the bus all by yourselves?" Jamie added, him and Matt laughing. You rolled your eyes and Alex looked at you, then back at the guys.

"Nah, I think we'll go," he said, grabbing your hand, walking you to his dressing room to change, the rest of the guys doing the same. Alex wore the blue button up that you'd bought him for his birthday, he wore it every chance he got, it only being special because you had bought it and not anyone else. He quickly stepped into his black jeans and tugged them up, buttoning and zipping them.

You were on your phone most of the time, responding to messages from friends and family who were asking about the show. Alex saying your name snapped you out of your daze and you looked up at him, seeing his adorable, lazy grin that he only did when he was alone with you, not wanting to show it in public in fear of breaking his 'bad boy' persona that he had.

"You're so cute," you smiled, laughing when he made a weird face at you. You wished that he showed his playful and goofy side in public, you thought that his persona wasn't truthful to who he actually was - a shy, quiet, socially awkward, playful romantic boy.

"You ready?" Alex asked, holding his hand out for you to grab. You took his hand and he helped you stand up, grabbing his bag that had the clothes he performed in and you both walked out, leaving the building entirely, seeing the guys waiting for you two.

"You guys ready?" Matt asked, leaning on the car, Nick and Jamie getting in it along with Mark in the very back, Jamie sitting where he sat on the way to the venue.

"Yeah," you said. You and Alex then got into the car, sitting in the same spots as before, you in between Alex and Jamie, Alex beside the window.

The drive was full of singing, shitty jokes, and occasionally sneaky kisses between you and Alex. Nick and Jamie ended up arguing about witch soccer team was better and it was fairly funny, Matt even joined in. You couldn't help but laugh when they tried to bring Alex into the argument, though he quickly stopped that, saying that he didn't have a say in it.

You layed your head down on Alex's shoulder for the rest of the drive, holding hands, tuning out the stupid argument going on between the rest of the boys.

The car came to a halt at a restaurant, everyone getting out and walking inside, stopping in the entryway for the band to take a picture with a fan of theirs. You all then walked over to a podium where a waitress was standing.

"How many?" they asked, getting ready to pick up some menus.

"Uh ... six," Matt said, stopping for a moment to count up all of you.

"Okay, right this way," they said, picking up six menus, leading you all to a round table where you all took your seats. The seat beside you was empty, Alex sitting on the other side. The waitress left and soon after another waiter came to take your drink orders, bringing them out not long after.

It was a few more minutes until you all had decided what you were going to order and the waiter was quick to come back and take your orders, rushing it to the kitchen.

The boys somehow got back onto their argument on soccer, their bickering amusing, it was like they were children arguing about what superhero was the best which made it all the more better.

They seemed to be too into the argument to notice that Alex was now much closer to you, his hand rubbing up and down your thigh, brushing dangerously close to your clothed clit. You quickly grabbed his hand, reminding him that you were in public. He didn't seem to care though, continuing to rub your thigh, lightly brushing against your clit through the material of your shorts. You held back a gasp and grabbed his hand, pulling it away from you.

He glared at you, grabbing your hand, kissing it. You all talked until your food arrived at the table, though that didn't stop Alex from teasing you again. Whenever the guys were looking away from you two he would whisper dirty things in your ear.

"I can't wait till we get back to the bus."

"You look so hot right now, princess."

You knew that this was either him being horny as always, or it was his gig high that he hadn't shaken off yet. Your second thought was confirmed when he went back to rubbing you thigh, never wanting to do something like this in public, whispering in your ear. "When we get back to the bus, I'm going to fuck you up." That was it, you were gone, couldn't handle his teasing any longer.

"Please, Alex," you said quietly, begging him with your eyes. "As you wish, princess," he said, taking his hand off your thigh. "Hey, guys, I think we're gonna head back to the bus, she's not feeling really well," Alex lied, you playing along.

"Oh, okay, hope you feel better, love," Matt said, drinking his beer. "Thanks, Matt," you said softly, acting as if you were actually not well. You and Alex said your goodbyes to Jamie, Nick, and Mark and then left the restaurant, rushing to get to the bus.

You were both very eagar, more than  you could've ever remembered, the ten minute walk taking a little less than five when you began to hurriedly get there, pushing past people so you could get there faster.

As soon as you both reached the bus and got in, Alex pushed you against the wall, attaching his slightly chapped lips to yours, moving in sync with one another. He bit down on your bottom lip, demanding entrance and you complied, his tongue easily fighting yours into submission. He was quick to rid you of your shirt, working on getting your pants off.

Once he rid you of your pants, leaving you in your bra and panties, he grabbed the underside of your thighs, signaling for you to jump, to which you did. He carried you to your shared bunk with him. You shuffled out of the rest of your garments before crawling into the top bunk, watching as Alex took off his own clothes, crawling in and laying over you, closing the curtain.

He wasn't in the mood to tease you anymore, too far gone just like yourself. He was quick to give his thick cock a few tugs before he nestled himself between your legs, slowly pushing in, head falling down on your shoulder when he bottomed out, the feeling of your walls stretching to fit his size too much for him.

He let you adjust to his size before starting to move, going slowly, setting a pace of his own liking, though it didn't last long, he couldn't take it anymore, his need to hear you moan for him growing immensely. And it didn't take long before you were a moaning mess for him, fingers knotting in his precious hair that you loved so much.

He began to place wet kisses on your neck, one of his hands coming in between your bodies to rub vigorously on your clit, his other hand the only thing holding all of his weight off of you. You knew that it wouldn't be long until you came undone, his thrusts getting faster and faster, but at the same time sloppier and it was obvious that he wasn't very far off either.

"A-Alex, I'm so close," you whimpered, voice trailing off into a moan as Alex had delivered a particularly hard thrust, hitting the spongey spot that made you see stars.

"Come for me, princess," he said, delivering one more hard thrust, flicking your clit, sending you over the edge, your own orgasm triggering Alex's, his hips stilling, his hot release spurting inside you.

His support arm gave out and he collapsed on top of you, panting heavily.

"God, I love you," he panted, the both of you coming down from your highs. "I love you too, Al," you responded.

All of a sudden, you heard the bus door open and heard Matt yell yours and Alex's name. You heard him walk over to the bunk and opened the curtain, quickly closing it when  he saw you both.

"God, Al, you could've given me a warning," Matt said, walking away. "Jamie, Nick, don't look in their bunk. Trust me, you'll regret it," you heard Matt say in the small lounge room and Nick and Jamie's laughter echoed through the bus.

"Sorry," Alex yelled, pulling out of you with a sigh, the two of you shuffling so that you both could sleep comfortably in the very small bunk. "Goodnight, princess, I love you.

"I love you too, Al."

[lucky-katebishop]

I spent a month reading harry potter fanfics and here’s what I learned

So for the past three and a half weeks, I’ve been doing basically nothing but reading Harry Potter fanfics and now I kind of just want to talk about them. No one cares but future me will! I tend to get caught in obsessions fairly easily (for instance, two months ago was comic books and last month was video editing and then k dramas). I’m feeling like my Harry Potter obsession is fading which makes me really sad cause it was a fun ride. I went from Drarry to Hinny, time travel to alternate realities, obscuris Harry to Dark!Harry, MCU AUs to Doctor Who AUs. I must’ve read more than 50 fics.

I’ve learned that I hate Dumbledore

Snape makes for a great mentor but I will only like him with proper character development

also where did Snape being Draco’s godfather come from? I don’t think this was in the books? I’m not angry, just confused

I read a fic that was so sad that I was physically unable to finish reading it -- actually I read two of those, one of them was a DID fic and the other Voldemort adopted Harry

the Voldemort one is quite possibly the most tragic thing I have ever read and even though it’s been two weeks I still haven’t been able to recover -- I was only halfway finished too GOOD LORD

another fic I read that was so fucking depressing was a time loop situation where Harry literally couldn’t get out of and it ended tragically

obscuris Harry is interesting but I really only like the ones where Newt is actually involved but I couldn’t find any finished ones

I don’t like it when Harry’s appearance changes, it throws me for a loop

there was this one where Harry got sent back in time and his figure got disfigured and so he didn’t even appear like himself anymore

I just find it odd for Harry Potter not to look like Harry Potter, idk

I also have a headcanon that his hair is very curly rather than shaggy

I haven’t been able to find a fic where Harry goes back in time to the Marauders era and has the right amount of angst but the right amount of fluff

I’ve read some good ones where the Marauders travel to Harry’s time but like,,, it isn’t quite what I’m looking for? I’m gonna have to write it, aren’t I? 

this doesn’t happen with irondad fics, literally everything you’ve ever wanted you can find it there

I read one where Harry did go back in time but she (fem!Harry) didn’t really interact with her parents or the Marauders that much, she became friends with Regulus instead

Regulus should’ve been in Gryffindor

I’ve not only read fics where Draco has been a Ravenclaw, Slytherin, but also a Gryffindor. I haven’t found one where he’s in Hufflepuff

I’ve read fics where Harry’s in every single house - the Ravenclaw one might be my favorite so far, it had to do with him going to a different timeline where there’s another Harry and he’s a major dick

Hufflepuff Harry one was funny, but it got distressing cause Dumbledore didn’t trust him and tried to get him expelled

actually the Hufflepuff one made my heart hurt cause Harry was put in the body of a Harry who isn’t the boy who lived and barely spoke and was basically like an even more traumatized Neville

Slytherin Harry is everything to me and he should’ve been in Slytherin

Ravenclaw Draco is something that can be so personal

I’m tired of reading Year One fics, I get it, there’s a stone, let’s move on

Year Four fics are my favorite however, there was one (which is my favorite) where Harry’s a necromancer and in the graveyard scene he calls corpses from the graves alive to help him get out of there it was so cool

I am partial to Harry/Draco but Harry/Luna is cute

there was a Pokemon Harry/Luna one that’s adorable and I’ve read it twice already

I like when there’s a ton of lore involved

especially Hogwarts lessons - like ancient runes can fucking get it, I love runes fics

there was an MCU AU one where I read Harry didn’t have his magic anymore, not as potent as it was, but he did have ancient runes

LISTEN I tried to get into Dark!Harry but after that Voldemort adoption one I can’t do it anymore, I will start crying literally right now -- he just wants to be fucking useful! He just wants to be loved! Is that too much to fucking ask for? 

however Harry doing dark!magic but isn’t actually on the dark side is cool

Death Eater Spy Draco! It makes me distressed but also I am so here for it!

Jenkins if you’re out there I love you (if you get this reference I love you)

I read a ton of Avengers adopt Harry when he’s younger but I don’t care for younger Harry fics, I prefer when he’s a teenager and I don’t have to read the first few years at Hogwarts, it can get repetitive

Give me all the angst with Harry being a horcrux please, I’m living for the drama

Lily is not a fan favorite weirdly enough, when the Marauders are in fics she’s usually not there which is unfortunate because I just really want a good Harry/Lily bonding moment

one of the saddest fics I read was where harry, luna, hermione and neville find themselves in an alternate dimension where Lily and Remus are married and alive, James is a dick but has other kids, and every single person that had died in their world is alive

I don’t like it when there’s Ron bashing, he’s one of my favorites, but if I have to, I’ll read some of them

there was this Sherlock fic (listen, I went in fucking deep, it’s been a weird month) where fem!Harry is on the run from the Ministry because I don’t actually understand and Ron and everyone is out for blood for her

Eleventh Doctor/Harry is a pairing I was not aware of but I actually kind of love?

Master of Death Harry is fucking OP and I love him for that

mcu aus is something I never knew I needed

Holly Potter and the Midlife Crisis is fucking everything

So is On Punching Gods and Absentee Dads, I realized it was the same author when I read in the author notes that the author was going to some volcano convention thing and I was like this is way too niche for it to be a coincidence

I’ve read Tony is Harry’s dad, Loki is Harry’s dad, Harry is just weird friends with Thor, ones where Natasha is Harry’s aunt

listen everyone is related to this boy

I will not read a fic if it doesn’t involve Harry, he’s my boy, he’s my love, I care only about him and him only I’m so sorry

you know that meme where people say nobody’s favorite character is harry potter, the titular character? Well meet me! He’s my favorite!

in battle of hogwarts fics, Remus almost always dies. Why is that? Why do you guys hate him so much? It’s always half and half for Fred, I never know if he’s going to live or not

In all of the good fics I’ve read I saw in the collections area of ao3 the same collection and I was like! You get me! 

if it says Gammily’s Bookshelf on the fic, it’s gonna be a really fucking great fic let me just tell you that right now

Parseltongue gets me so riled up, I fucking love Parseltongue, it’s so cool

there’s a reason I usually filter out non/c*n but I decided to let it flow and I ran into a few that fucking d e s t r o y e d me why do you guys read shit like this, it broke my heart

that being said I read one that was really nuanced and actually really good but it’ll never be finished and I’m very mad about that

Either we have a better understanding of how goblins could be utilized  than JKR or we’re just ignorant of how powerful they can be

weird coincidence that I’ve read two completely different fics where Harry thought having a threesome meant kissing three different people

Dumbledore’s a bitch and I hate him, every fic I’ve read so far agrees with me

there is a person out there that is CARRYING the bucky barnes/harry potter pairing on their back and I hope whoever that is knows how much I appreciate them

remind me never to click on a fic that hasn’t been updated since 2015 ever again, C’est La Vie I will miss you so

this is just a fucking quarter of the harry potter fics I’ve read but thanks for reading if you did, let me know if you want to know some of the titles