#this is in fact me tricking myself into writing a helpful review

[shamelesslymkp]

@mayakern OK so I have a PLAN to write a nice and helpful review of your skirts, but I honestly have no idea if I'll actually be able to follow through anytime soon or if it'll just languish in my head for the rest of time, so this is a PLACEHOLDER nice and helpful review that just says HER SKIRTS ARE V. NICE, IF PLUS SIZE AND ON FENCE HIGHLY RECOMMEND DO BUY

[millerflintstone]

It's been a while since I've pushed myself to do something out of my comfort zone for career related purposes. In my mid to late 20s, it was getting out recruiting and recruiting related admin work and getting into something technical. I started learning object oriented programming at a community college after work hours to see if I liked it and no one was more surprised than me that I did like it. I made a career switch into software engineering right before I turned 30. Was an intern and everything.

In my 30s, it was getting really good at that. I aimed to get to a senior level and ended up focusing on a specific niche and carving out a path to get better at that. Then I kind of got myself stuck in healthcare software development land because it offered me remote work back when that wasn't a popular option. It helped me deal with financial crap related to my mom and sister and provided flexibility. I really love working remotely but I also got a chance to travel a bit and learned I was good at being a consultant. I did enjoy a lot of the problems I helped solve across the different places where I worked. But travel gets old. I did that for a decade until about 2019 and that last consultant job became full-time and then turned into the TX job from hell.

The one good thing about the TX job from hell was that I got exposure to more Microsoft development things like Visual Studio, SSIS, SSMS. But I do often wonder if I didn't feel the responsibility towards my mom and sister if I would have gotten out of my the hell I let myself get into a lot sooner than I did with regards to the industry and type of software development. My burnout really started when I stopped attempting to challenge myself. Or maybe the fact that I stopped attempting to challenge myself was a sign of that burnout starting? IDK.

Anyway ...

With the content writer / reviewer thing, I've gotten exposure to Python and I've gotten good at testing short scripts. I haven't really had to work my brain, though. But it has been nice to feel that excitement again.

However, with my first official technical writing project, which kicked off on Tuesday, I kind of got into panic mode the past couple of days. I noticed I was avoiding really starting on it because I was terrified I'd hate it or that I'd feel completely overwhelmed, like I did at the last job that did the whole bait and switch on my role and its duties. I realized what I was doing though. It felt akin to self-sabotage and maybe it is that in part. Today was really tough and I was texting Unfriendly about it to voice it because I was so frozen. I identified that I had to start getting out of it by calling it out. Naming it. Not tricking myself into doing other shit, though I had been doing other shit to avoid it. I had to ask myself WHY I was doing this other shit when the thing I had been really wanting to try was in front of me.

Now that I've been working on the project for the past hour, another part of my brain has kicked in that I haven't really had to use since my English major. It's not something I'm bad at, but I recognize that I am rusty. And it is at least slightly more interesting to me than the torturous class section I had on the Romantic Poets in undergrad, so there's that I guess.

[jessequinones]

Writing Lesson: It’s okay to make mistakes.

I know as a writer I make mistakes, in fact, I’m certain if you go through this text you’ll find grammar and punctuation errors and that's ok. This text isn’t a book or a peer review essay. It’s a conversation from me to you about mistakes in writing.

When I was young, learning how to write, I created this.

***

2010, Wildcats: Civil War

“What are you saying?” A black tom said to a brown tom with anger in his voice.

Before he was finish Shadow walk away wan Deathclan was about to leave but what Whiteheart said next made Shadow froze in his tracks. “I know I can beat you.”

“Is that so?” Shadow said as he was turning around and was slowly walking back toward Whiteheart.

“That is correct.”

“Well then….let’s have a little battle right here and now then.”

Whiteheart could not say no, or back down now. He walks right it in this battle.

***

Yeah...it’s not good but the point is, even though I was a terrible writer, I never stole my writings. All of my terrible stories were original and that’s what I want to talk to you about today.

The word plagiarism has been going around the internet for the last few days and I noticed when people who plagiarised other’s works get caught they tend to say they don’t feel comfortable with their own writings and thought it was a good idea to steal. Assuming they’re genuine, let me say it’s okay if your writing isn’t good, that’s how we learn.

You write a bad sentence or a paragraph which doesn’t make sense, and someone will point it out. You’ll learn over time not to make the same mistakes and grow as a writer. Just copying from someone else won’t help you learn because you’re no longer making mistakes, you’re just copying.

I always hated the saying you gotta keep practising your craft to get better because there were a few times when I thought I couldn’t improve. I kept practicing but I kept making the same mistakes and didn’t know how to get better. For those types of situations, I find it best to ask someone whose more experience how to overcome your hurdle and let me be the first to say there are plenty of people in your craft who’ll be willing to help.

As for writing, here’s a trick I did to help me create stories. For practice, I took a book, like the Warrior series for an example, and copied their words. Before you say that’s plagiarism, first things first, I never published the stories I was copying, and secondly, I was figuring out how the Erin Hunters were creating their stories.

When artists learn how to draw for the first time, they copy someone else’s art style and maybe even do trace works until they become confident in their ability to create their own. I was still trying to learn what my writing style was, and I wanted to figure out how someone else created theirs. Over time I started to get an understanding of how sentence structure was made. I understood foreshadowing, and I understood when and where to add descriptions. I would start looking at lines in the books after I wrote them and be like...I could improve this. I started to see things I didn’t think were necessary for the story and after a while, I told myself I was ready to write my own Warriors fanfic.

Learning from someone else, being inspired by another. These are all things that’ll help you grow as a writer but you still got to do the work yourself. You can’t say you created something original if 90% of it was stolen, you’re only hurting yourself.

If you’re a new writer and have questions, even if you think they’re very basic, please feel free to ask me. I’m not the best writer. In fact, I don’t really know how to create informative writing, which is why I’m practising now, but I do know a few things and am always willing to help someone if I have the time and don’t forget. Keep trying and keep writing, your writing is better than you give it credit for.

[le-amewzing]

I Need Your Help

An old NealPeter drabble, seen thru Mozzie's eyes. XD

Fic: "I Need Your Help" [FFN] [AO3]

Pairings/Characters: Mozzie & Neal Caffrey, onesided?Neal/Peter Burke

Rating: K

Words: ~580

Additional info: friendship, angst, romance, 3rd person POV

Summary: Moz attempts to explain to Neal what he sees plain as day.

      Mozzie was sitting outside a tiny café, having coffee, when his cellphone rang. He answered it, knowing who it was without even needing to glance at the caller ID.

      "Hey, Moz—"

      "Neal, stop right there. I am not taking any requests today. I've set a little me-time aside for once—"

      "Mozzie, I need your help."

      Mozzie internally groaned. He removed his glasses, pinched the bridge of his nose, and replaced his glasses. "Neal… Do you even know how many times you've said that to me?"

      He could hear shuffling around on Neal's end. "I have an idea, but I'm sure you're willing to give me a hard number."

      "Not today, my friend. But I take it that the Suit is in trouble, yet again?"

      "See? You know me so well, Mozzie. So please, just listen. Peter—"

      "Before I commit to any kind of listening, may I point something out to you, Neal?"

      The other end of the line went quite. "All right. Shoot," Neal slowly agreed.

      "When I asked you if you knew how many times you had requested my help, I was only beginning to point something out. You see, you rarely ask me to help you."

      "What? I ask all the time—too much, in fact—"

      "No, Neal, you don't need my help. You want Peter to have my help."

      "Well, yeah, Moz…"

      Mozzie sipped his coffee. "Therefore, you do not need my help. The Suit needs my help."

      "Mozzie, quit playing around. So my syntax is a little funny…"

      "And your context is way off." Mozzie searched for the right words. "Neal, you're a man who doesn't want to see his loved ones get hurt. You worry about me, you worry about Sarah, you worry about June and her granddaughter, you worry about Mrs. Suit and Satchmo—"

      "I get it, I worry about everyone. But now's not a good time to be pointing out how big a worrywart I can be, Moz."

      "My point is that you don't just worry about the Suit. When Peter's in trouble, you drop everything and try to rush to his side. When Peter's in trouble, you panic and go crazy. When Peter's in trouble and it's because of you, the person you hate the most in those moments is yourself, because it's in those times that you wish you had run away from him again. That way, he might stay safe."

      "What's your real point, Moz?" Neal asked, and it sounded as though he were talking through gritted teeth. Ah, he was irritated. Maybe Mozzie had found the right words after all.

      "My point, Neal, is that you cease to be the world's greatest conman, Neal Caffrey," Mozzie said quietly into the receiver, "when the average FBI agent Peter Burke gets into even a fender-bender."

      "What, are you saying I care too much?"

      Mozzie smiled. "I'm just saying that you need to figure out why. It's as plain to me as the sky is blue as to why."

      Another silent moment. "So you're going to turn this into another one of your puzzles, Moz?"

      "You're a smart man, Neal. You'll figure it out."

      An even longer pause. "You know, I still need your help. Peter's walking right into a trap and I want—we should help him."

      Mozzie rolled his eyes; this was like trying to get Satchmo to do a trick! "Of course, Neal. Give me an address and I should see you in twenty."

XD Not bad for my 1st WC fic! :333 I'm pretty proud of it… I've been a fan of the show from the beginning; I just delayed writing for it for no reason, really. But seeing the previews for season 4 really pushed home this idea that's been bugging me—Neal really does call Mozzie and ask for help whenever he's worried about Peter, doesn't he?

Thanks for reading, and feel free to leave an anon/unsigned review via the FFN link or comment via the AO3 link at the top of the post, especially if you enjoyed this!

~mew

2023 note: Well. *asdfghjkl* Excuse me while I go chew out myself from 2012 bc I see no other WC fics amongst my files?? ;w; I might have some ideas scribbled down in a ntbk somewhere, but DAMMIT now I wanna do a WC rewatch…! I rly loved this show so, so much. Ngl, I still think we deserve a made-for-TV movie following that series finale, yo. TTwTT (On the bright side, only like one edit to make to prep this to cross-post to AO3 and to tumblr! :D)

[audio-luddite]

Wretched Excess.... or not?

It is fun cruising the internoise. There are people who drive a Ferrari to work, if indeed work they do. The tiny percent people have money to spend and lots of help doing that.

I was baited into looking at a video from TAS about the old / new personality Michael Fremer. He is a recognized Guru for LPs and has a legitimately good reputation in professional recordings. He has movie music soundtracks and other cool stuff in his resume'. He also has a stupid expensive audio system.

I should also say it is very very good. But the expense cannot be overstated.

The video is a tour of his audio system. To be sure his main job is to review equipment and that entails a revolving door of hardware. But he does admit to owning a lot of 6 figure devices. Hey watch it and be amazed.

The word dumbfounded comes to mind. Holy Shit. Things like that.

There are some blogs and discussion boards that are amazed and actually hostile about this video. That is unfair. He has made lots of money and it is his business. If you got it flaunt it baby. For that even if I had a couple million to spend I would not get any of this stuff.

Fun thing is towards the end of this he does a party trick. This is what I really want to talk about here. He has a set of calibrated microphones that sit in your ears like earbuds. They turn his head into a legitimate binaural recording device. He assures us this is very accurate reflection of his experience. He played his system and sat in his chair. You can hear what he hears. I was on my headphones and it was impressive.

Now this was YouTube playing on my laptop, but it claims a High end (ya sure) sound card and has a funky music system logo embossed on the case. The earbuds were from my Iphone when they had a jack.

The music was clear and frankly impressive.

So much so I tracked down the artist and the album. Lori Lieberman a very good singer songwriter. Jazz and American songbook type music.

Fun fact my generation had two songs that perplexed and fascinated us. "American Pie" by Don Mclean, and "Killing Me Softly with his song" by Roberta Flack. Apparently Ms Lieberman went to a Don Mclean concert and was so moved she sketched out a poem on a napkin about it. That was shared with two others who helped write that song. It did not become a hit until R. Flack recorded it after hearing the original version while on a flight. Then those two partners tried to hide her contribution and even deny she was involved. Lawyers made money.

Explains why she quit the music business for a long time.

I listened to much of this album on Itunes in my car on the way home from work. I liked most of it. The song that Fremer played through his trick microphones was "Truly".

When I got home I fired up the franken-amp and the other stuff necessary for a couple hours to get it all warm and magically aligned. After dinner and home roasting a batch of coffee and a brutal aerobic workout I sat down to listen.

My goal was to listen to the same stuff that Fremer played on his six figure system on my four figure system with some consumer grade good stuff. I did this.

To be sure Iphone buds and my laptop are not SOTA. Fremer's system is about as SOTA as it can get. So the stuff I heard on my full size system was better. There was more clarity and I need another go to be sure but I heard deeper into the venue and arrangements and supporting musicians. Pretty damn good.

The album is available in all the fancy streaming formats and of course vinyl. I may buy it if I convince myself all the tracks are my cup of tea, or home roasted coffee.

Aside from everything else Fremer can pick high end albums like few others can.

[alpona]

KR Geats episode 6 live blog:

Note: I've been writing these review-ish silly reaction thingies since the 1st episode, but haven't posted them here on Tumblr. But decided to do them from now on, starting with last week's episode. Originally written on the same day episode 6 aired, live while watching.

*Spoiler alert of course*

Anyway.

- The dessert looks delicious.

- Ace searching online info, so that's what mary ojisan used to do... Well, let's observe Ace-kun's phone for more clues! Simple black cover, Full network full battery, is that telegram?... Nah not much to see.

- hey wait, tell me you finished the dessert before going, Neon-chan! The Food!!

- team swap time, Mary cheated of course, but the draw cards have rider symbol embossed? That's an easy way for cheating, anyone can do it if they try!

- punkjack.. nah, Halloween-chan, the nickname Mary ojisan gave matches perfectly with my silly nickname sense lol

- Ace returned boost buckle to keiwa, good, but let's see how Keiwa ends up NOT using it this time. 🤣

- hmm btw, Ace not only mentored Neon, he's also mentoring (-ish something) Keiwa as well, in his own way. And probably Buffa too.

- oh, so they told Keiwa the trick of this round?

- 'better inconvenience myself than let others suffer' - Ah, I've been around many Keiwas in life... No no, this isn't the time for real deep talk! You saw nothing!

- Stolen. Ah, I'm starting to wonder if this show is actually the tale of "100 times I found you, 100 times I lost you" love story of Tycoon and boost buckle 😑🤣

- nice transition to Buffa flashback. Oh I mean Azuma-kun.

And more detail of the backstory!

- Ah, so other riders stole zombie buckle from his friend. The friend was a rider with...Blue core? Someone with better eyes please tell me what rider it was.

And Geats more likely didn't have a part in it after all, he's the one rider Azuma clearly saw there, and he's more like, venting his anger at Ace.

- Crying Keiwa is a mood! Everyone, let's save this as our wallpaper.

- heh, look at Ace-kun smiling like a proud father.

- there's quite a few seaside scenes this episode, it's a nice location.

- Woaah! The clock-up/ mannequin challenge action scene looks so cool!

- ohoho, Buffa switched partners at the last moment, that is not a strategy I could think of! Nice!

- So clearly Azuma-kun sees reflections of his dead friend in Keiwa, and he's a tsundere who eneded up helping Keiwa. His hatred for Ace will also disappear eventually.

If things are simple that is. Who knows what a 'world restart' would end up doing.

- yes Keiwa-kun, ask the important questions! So disqualified riders just return to their regular lives... Hmm ok but I'd believe it when I see proof.

Final round so close! Probably in 2 episodes we'll get to it.

Oh, I'm so engrossed in the story n mysteries that I didn't even bother with the fact that it's a competition, we can root for characters to win...? Well, this isn't something I do in general these days anyway, I only 'root for' a good story, no matter which character does what.

But well, are you guys rooting for anyone?

(will be happy to discuss the plot n hundreds of questions!)

[mspi]

My uncs laughs when he catches me like this. Then he's amazed when I bring out my fists to play 🪨📄✂️ against myself for the answer. It's a helpful trick.

Friends love my being ambidextrous because it means I can take the awkward corner spot of the table that no one else wants since their right handed selves will be bumping into others. Well, you're welcome. Just kidding.

Maybe that's why I enjoy my tech career, the facts are there whether you like them or not. All you need to do is work your butt off to get everything down and hope you like math.

Tutors are out there who can help you if needed. I had a great one who saw that my only prob was my vision. Ohh, that's why it makes sense when I close my eyes and imagine writing on a board in front of me to get the answers. Don't worry, professors at top end universities out here couldn't believe it either.

That's until they took me in at their schools and hospitals to study me more. It's ok, I was given a multiple choice touch screen to give my answers. Not bad, however they were disappointed in a few of their students who I've caught cheating when reviewing their projects. Oh that last bit was from a professor who crushed on me when they found out I avoided their major bc I didn't want to go into debt with something I could pick up on my own for free.

The 🪨📄✂️ was something I discovered I could play on my own after I got use of my arms & hands again. It seriously would've been helpful to know when deciding on a concentration. Nah. I love my choice.

-- dnagirl

12.09.2023

[pradaksj]

the swimming lessons

all rights reserved © pradaksj

↳do not repost, translate, or claim as your own.

❧ pairing⟶  jungkook/reader

❧ genre⟶  swimminginstructor!jungkook , fluff, a bit of comedy? head canon/bullet points 

❧ rating⟶ e for everyone??? none??? idk how ratings work lol i just know that m = the dirty, which this story has none of

❧ word count ⟶ 5,000 

❧ summary ⟶  accidental swimming lessons with jungkook were definitely worth the money 

❧ a/n ⟶ i literally dreamt something similar to this in like january and told myself i'd write about it when i had the time so hear i am :)) this goes out to all my folks who can’t swim !! i'm on the same boat with you , get it?  cause we can’t swim ... ok anyways ... enjoy ! (note: i have not proofread this yet so sorry for any mistakes!! ill get to it soon !! ) 

“hello, welcome to lucky duck swim school, how can i help you?” the receptionist, who was loudly chewing her gum, sounded more like an automated voice message than a person...

see today was your first official swimming lesson

yay!! 

how fun!! ...

://

totally not embarrassing for someone your age !!!

honestly, it wasn't your fault you didn’t have any family members or friends with a big pool you could learn in growing up 

and by the time you did, you were too much of in an awkward phase to be properly taught

aka your body absolutely refusing to float on its own anymore

but after several trips to the beach with friends and attending different pool parties, you were tired of being made fun of !! 

no longer would you remain at 5 feet and under !!! not on your watch ! 

and so here you were, ready to start your journey into the world of swimming :)) 

“hi i um have a swimming lesson at 3 with um ... i believer her name was um—” 

hmmm what was her name ??? jennie??? no, maybe it was aaliyah ??? no that wasn’t it.... 

the receptionist taps on her keyboard buttons, her long nails making a noise 

pop, her bubblegum goes 

“jungkook” 

“yeah jungkook” you mindlessly say. 

wait 

WAIIITT

jungkook????

ummmmm 

that was not the game given to you by the last receptionist 

jungkook is a boy’s name !!! 

you didn’t want a boy instructor !!! 

not with the way you were looking 

“i um—i had asked for a girl instructor—” you awkwardly mention 

she rolls her eyes

um RUDE 

she continues clacking with her keyboard, looking for god knows what 

she sighs 

“there’s no slots with female instructors available for today, nor for the rest of the month, the earliest i can probably squeeze you in by is july.” she bluntly states. 

JULY??? 

july was when you needed to already know how to swim !!

that’s the peak of summer ! 

there was no point in knowing during winter or any other season besides summer for that matter 

and you were not going to get made of by your friends this year

no no NO

“soo do i reschedule you or.....” 

you sigh 

“no ill take it” you pout, resembling a child. 

“it it makes you feel any better, jungkook’s our best instructor, most popular too” 

wink 

oh yeah that makes you feel so much better 

>:( 

you were going to make a complete fool out of yourself in front of the so called “best instructor” 

“well go get yourself washed up, get into the pool, and jungkook will be with you shortly” she smiles, her attitude now changing now that (what looked to be a supervisor) was passing by. 

what a bi—

flip flop. flip flop. flip flop. 

your sandles press onto the water on the floor of the girls locker room, a grouchy look now on your face 

this wasn't fair 

you made an appointment with a female instructor!! 

you didn’t care if he was the best instructor or the most popular ...

squeeaaakkk , you twist the rusty shower handle

...because now you were you were going to be judged for your lack of skills 

not that you had any to begin with, but still! 

god, you sounded like such a karen ... 

it’s just ...

a guy instructor ??? 

really??? 

you understood that this wasn’t elementary school anymore and boys certainly didn’t have cooties anymore but like :// 

no no, you had to give this jungkook guy the benefit of the doubt

if he was one of the best, it was clearly because he was professional and good at what he does 

putting your worries to rest, you turn off the shower 

this was going to be fine

just fine 

clearly your worries were not put to rest 

just a temporary halt 

:) 

pat. pat. pat. 

okay let’s get it ! 

making your way out to the pool, you dip your foot in 

ooooo 

cold

VERY cold indeed 

1 ...2...

you dip your whole leg in, quickly using the momentum to place your whole body in 

“5 feet and below ... you’re my bitch !!” you think to yourself 

your hand still clearly gripping onto the ledge, still afraid of accidentally reaching 6ft

.... now to wait 

“megan seems to have fractured her leg last weekend on a rollerskating day gone bad, so you’ll be taking up her appointments for the next month of two until she’s cleared for work” 

huh ???

“but—” 

“also she, well now you i guess, have a lesson to teach at..” 

jungkook’s supervisor looks down at his watch 

“oh i guess in 30 minutes, could’ve sworn it was at 4..” he mumbles that last part to himself

30 minutes?! 

“don’t worry i’ll up your pay for the remaining time that she gets better” 

he winks ;) making a clicking noise with his mouth before leaving the staff room 

jungkook sighs 

today was supposed to be an easy day :/ 

a simple cleaning of the pool along with a couple of measly hours of being the lifeguard and that would’ve been it but noooo 

he just had to be the highest rated swimming instructor on the company website 

he couldn’t complain though, sometimes it was fun reading the reviews past students left, even if sometimes they were a little too...

whats the word...

provocative? 

it often made him wonder if he was in fact an actual good swimming instructor or if the high highly rated reviews were for other reasons.... 

honestly it’d be dumb of him not to acknowledge the amount of googly eyes he’d get ranging from the mother’s of his younger students to his actual adult students (female and male) 

he just liked to think that didn’t come into play when they wrote their reviews 

hehe 

changing into his black fitted rash guard, he glanced at megan’s schedule 

name : y/n 

age: 23 grown

swimming level: beginner  aka noob. 

he chuckles to himself 

well won’t this be fun 

he couldn’t lie beginner adult swimmers were always a spectacle to watch 

they almost reminded him of baby ducks learning how to swim 

only that they’d verbally curse their frustrations here and there 

quickly showering, he begins to make his way to the pool 

hmm, he wonders..

what should he eat after today’s lesson? 

a bacon cheese burger sounded really good 

maybe even grab himself some birria tacos from that new restaurant that just opened near his apartment 

hmm no he had to start spending less on takeout 

sigh 

looks like it’d be rame—

woah 

as corny as it sounded, he could’ve sworn he felt his heart skip a beat 

because whoever it was in that pool was pretty, like really pretty 

hOly ????? 

wowzers 

you couldn’t be y/n ... could you?!?!?! 

you were the only person who looked 23 years of age in the pool ...

ermmmmmm 

mayday mayday 

jungkook.exe has STOPPED WORKING  

whoever this jungkook person was, sure was taking their time 

deciding to have some fun before your lesson, you begin to gently play with the water 

swish. swoosh , the water goes 

soon you’d be well on your way to becoming the next michael phelps 

hehe 

maybe with time you’d even be able to a somersault in the water like your friend always—

“y/n?” a voice from behind says your name

ah finally 

taking in a deep breath, you turn your attention to the so called “best swimming instructor” 

OH.

MY .

GOD. 

WHAT ?????? 

this man looked like he came straight out of GQ magazine !!!! 

this HAD to be some mistake , there was just no way ... 

your cheeks feel as if they were burning up 

probably because they quite literally were 

there was no way you’d be able to come here every saturday for the next month, not without fawning for this dude every single minute 

“u-um” 

of course you were a stuttering mess

of FuCkiNg course 

“that’s me” 

cue the awkward smile 

:) 

“be professional” jungkook tells himself

at the end of the day, you were his student 

any crush on you would just have to wait until of course ... you were no longer his student 

for now the only goal was : teach you how to swim 

the next one down the list being : to take you out on a date ! 

he offers you a handshake 

wow he had a strong grip 

“i’m jungkook, i’ll be your swimming instructor for the next month” 

he flashes you his all too famous smile

there was just no way this man was real

just nO wAy 

“um..” 

crap, you were still holding his hand! 

idiot, idiot, idiot ! 

“sorry” you awkwardly laugh 

ha ha ha 

so funny 

:/ 

god did you just want to hide to disappear 

“it’s fine” he laughs 

even his laugh was attractive :( 

ugh 

“so y/n, before we begin with anything, i think it’s important to review about what kind of things you already know and what you don’t” 

oh right ... 

for a moment you had COMPLETELY forgotten you were here for swimming lessons 

how embarrassing 

“oh um..” 

um, um , um. 

IS THAT ALL YOU KNEW HOW TO SAY???? 

“so like floating, holding your breath underwater, pushing, gliding, arm movement, that kind of stuff,” he explains 

you knew a cool trick to make it look like you were water bending :D 

of course you weren’t going to admit that here 

silently you nod your head no 

he gives you a reassuring smile, sensing your timidness 

“that’s fine, only more for us—” he corrects himself, “for you to learn,” he laughs 

hey you weren’t complaining 

;) 

“so i personally always like to start off with teaching my students how to float. as long as we get that down then you’ll have no problem learning the rest” 

gosh his smile was so infectious 

shaking your head, you reminded yourself that this was your teacher 

+ you paid 300 bucks for these classes, so you couldn’t afford to be giving him the googly eyes all day 

you were so cute :( 

jungkook couldn’t help but find you so endearing 

the color of your swimming goggles even matched your swim suit :(( 

so cute ! 

“okay so the first thing i want you to practice is going underwater for a couple of seconds, just so you get used it,” he instructs, “i’ll demonstrate” 

taking in a deep breath, he goes down under 

1...2...3 

he’s back up 

pausing for about another three seconds, he takes in another deep breath of air before going back under 

1...2....3...4....5

he repeats the same thing over and over, until the max count becomes 20. 

“use my finger as your reference of when to go up, but come up for air whenever you feel like you need to. it’s important to go at your own pace, so don’t feel pressured to get it the first try” 

no pressure at all 

okay 

“you ready?” 

you nod your head 

“okay, deep breath in”

you sink your head underwater, mentally counting the three seconds before going back up 

“good job,” he gives you a high five, and you almost feel like a schoolgirl, “now let’s try to five seconds” 

woo!!! 5 seconds here you come !! 

taking in a deep breath you go down under again 

1....2.....3....4...5

easy peasy ... LEMON SQUEEZY 

“okay now to ten” 

1.....2......3......4.....5......6....7

umm

now why were these seconds going by slow all of a sudden? 

sucking it up you manage to make it to 10, but not without being out of breath 

“you okay?” he’s quick to ask 

yup, totally fine ! 

you definitely didn’t see the gates of heaven for a quick moment :D 

nodding your head, you enthusiastically say, “let’s go for 15″ 

he smiles at your enthusiasm

ahh so cute 

“1....2.....3......4......5.......6......7......8......9.....10.....11.....12....13...

nope nope nope

you were not going to make it to 15 

immediately you make your way back to the surface, trying to catch your breath 

“hey you did amazing,” he immediately reassures you, “remember as long your going your own pace then you’re doing just fine” 

<3 

well doesn’t that make you feel better 

you wonder if he’s this kind to all his students 

besides the most obvious reason, there was no question as to why he was the “most popular” instructor 

and to think you had been complaining earlier !! 

and soon you’re back underwater, going at your own pace until finallyyyy you’re able to make the 20 second count 

“nice !!” he genuinely celebrates with you, making you feel completely proud for yourself 

“okay now that we have that done, we can move onto learning how to float facing both front and back” 

ohhhhh

he was just thinking ahead 

cool :o 

“so what i want you do is first relax,” he laughs, gently pushing your stiff shoulders down 

as if your blush couldn’t get any deeper 

“now my personal belief is that all humans can naturally float, just that for others, it takes a bit of a push to get them at that state,” he begins to explain 

others meaning people like um you 

“the key to floating is to relax” 

oh you’ve heard that before

many MANY times and each time you’ve tried to so called “relax” you just end up sinking 

“the moment you fight or stress for even a tiny bit, you will sink. now i know what you’re thinking, ive heard that before” 

damn 

he was good 

“but sadly it’s true, until you learn to relax then you’ll be able to swim” 

you sigh 

this was where it became hard 

you were the queen of stress 

you and stress went hand in hand almost like a married couple 

it was just that deep water was scary !! very very scary !! 

the amount of horror stories you’d seen on tiktok was enough for you to know, ocean = scary 

“so here’s what i need you to do, i need you to place your arms on top of the water like as if you’re going to fly” 

you follow his commands 

he separates your arms, which had been too close together, giving them a small rub 

“remember you need to relax y/n,” he chuckles, feeling the tension in your arms

“relax, i need to relax,” you repeat 

“okay now right now when i tell you, you’re gonna take a deep breath in and look down, from there you’re gonna let you body move forward. so remember you’re not gonna jump, you’re just gonna let your body glide forward and float. almost as if you’re flying to me,” he explains 

mm it was easier said than done  

“you ready?” 

“okay deep breath in” 

you inhale a deep breath in 

“look down” 

you do that as well 

“and let go” 

slowly your body begins to rise on its own 

oh my god !!!!! 

you were about to float!!!!! 

the day has come !!!

no more staying at 5 feet and under 

you were ready to hang with the big kids :D 

but as quick as the momentum came, the faster it left because soon you felt yourself sinking, the breathing exercise jungkook had made you do now coming in handy 

no!!!! 

you almost had it :( 

it was right in your grasp, only to have it snatched away 

not wanting to offend you, jungkook keeps his giggles to himself 

“hey at least you almost had it,” he comforts you, “let’s just try again” 

you sigh, now letting your doubts creep in 

because of this, this time your body almost immediately sank this time

he frowns 

you were losing confidence :/ 

“come on i’ll help you” 

grabbing your hands, he signals for you to follow his breathing pattern

“deep breath in” 

“deep breath out” 

god, was his voice soothing 

“i need you to relax y/n, let everything go” 

a soft feeling of relaxation washes over you, similar to that feeling you’d get when you were on the verge of sleeping

“i’m gonna let you go at the count of three, and then you’re going to float, okay?” 

silently you nod, knowing that speaking would only cause you to tense up again 

“1...2....” 

he lets go, and soon you’re floating, just like he said you would 

you hold your breathe for a good while before standing back up, a huge smile on your face 

“holy shit! i did it!!” 

he gives you high five with both of his hands, for a second holding them before letting go 

“now let’s try floating on your back” 

he notices that there’s now a fire in your eyes that wasn’t there before

clearly you were now more determined to learn, excited too

preparing yourself to float once more, you realize you were missing something.... 

“jungkook...” 

he tilts his head, confused by the faint blush on your cheeks 

“do you think you can um—” 

now it was his turn to blush��

“o-oh yeah” 

what was his problem??? 

you were a student asking for help 

that was all ...

point blank. 

he helps you get on your back, his hand placed under your back as a way to keep you up 

“1....2....” 

you float easily again!! 

“nice!!” he smiles 

summer, here you come !! 

“okay so we’re gonna keep practicing that for the remaining time that we have and next week i’ll start teaching you about stroke techniques and which ones are easiest to do” 

nodding your head, you practice your floating by the end of the hour  having it practically mastered 

the two of you get out of the pool, now drying off 

“you’re a really fast learner y/n,” he compliments you 

hehe 

you mean, you didn’t wanna brag butttt 

you were a fast learner indeed 

“thank you,” you say in return, “but that’s only because you’re a great teacher” 

woah 

did you really say that :o 

aren’t you feeling a little bold today y/n  

his blush returns for the second time today

well technically you weren’t in class anymore ... 

a little flirting wouldn’t hurt right? 

if only he knew what to say .... 

hmmmm 

“well at least you won't ever drown!” 

HUH???????

jungkook, you idiot !!!!! 

someone needed to smack him straight in the face for that ! 

at least you won’t drown????

no fucking shit 

well there goes his chances with you now going down the drain 

but to his surprise, you laugh 

“you’re right, i won’t,” you say in return, “well i’ll see you next weekend jungkook” 

you flash him a smile, and he was certain he felt butterflies in his stomach 

walking into the girl’s locker room, you let out a sigh of relief

wheeeeew ! 

faking confidence was hard ! 

very VERY hard 

“so today you’re going to learn how to stroke so you can officially be called someone who knows how to swim, next week you’ll learn to tread water and continue perfecting your swimming, and then the final week i’ll teach you some fun extra things” 

“sounds good,” you say, definitely excited to learn more. 

“okay so now that you know how to float, right now when you float facing downward, you’re going to pull against the current with your arms, alternating each one. now the tricky part is that while you do that, you also have to paddle your legs a little and come up for air when you need to, and when you’re back in the water you should slowly be exhaling bubbles of air rather than holding your breath” 

well that sounded hard :/ 

“let me give you a demonstration,” jungkook says

he’s quick to float facing downward, showing you the maneuver he wanted you to learn while coming up for air every five seconds

thought it was a little childish, he somehow still looked good doing it 

he truly was blessed with the looks of a god 

he comes out the water

“okay now your turn” 

you nod your head, that determined look you had on your face last week now returning 

following his example, you begin your attempt at paddling and stroking your arms at the same time

SPLASH! SPLASH! SPLASH! 

immediately you begin to panic and water begins to splash everywhere, including on jungkook 

noticing your panicked state, jungkook is quick to grab you and place you back on your feet 

“hey hey, i got you,” he comforts you, not wanting you to feel discouraged 

you sigh 

:/ 

well that was embarrassing 

“remember y/n you have to learn to coordinate everything, so think of it this way. your legs have to always be paddling, it’s the arm and coming up for air that switch roles. when you come up for air, it’s only your legs paddling, while when you’re head is back underwater it’s both your legs and arms paddling. once you get that pattern, the bubbling will come naturally” 

you make an ohhhhh face

you could do that ! 

“remember what i told you last weekend y/n, you need to relax and be comfortable so you can build confidence. there’s no need to panic because i’m here,” he smiles at you 

gosh this just wasn't fair >:( 

cute and charming ???? 

this boy really had it all 

not wanting to disappoint, you try one more time, failing once again 

now you were frustrated :/ 

“damn it,” you mumble to yourself, a sadness to your voice

jungkook feels his heart swell 

he didn’t like seeing you sad :( 

but doggy paddling was the most basic technique he could teach you so he couldn’t really cheer you up by offering a different technique 

you needed to learn to doggy paddle before you could move on to the more bigger strokes

damn it ://  

“hey don’t feel bad about not getting right away,” he gives you a small smile, “i remember when i first started learning it took me forever to even learn how float, so the fact that you’re already at this point is enough of an accomplishment” 

well that makes you feel little better ... 

“but you were probably a kid, im ...” 

old , is what you want to say 

figuring what you were gonna say, he only laughs 

“who said i was a kid? i was probably like 19″ 

whaaaaaattttt! 

assuming he was your age (which he was), you do the quick maths in your head 

that was like .... 4 years ago ! 

how the hell did he get so good in such little time???? enough to be teaching courses ??? 

“not knowing how to swim is nothing to be embarrassed about y/n, if anything it takes a lot of courage to even sign up for a class so don’t beat yourself up too much for not getting it right away” 

he ruffles your wet hair, a small affectionate gesture 

you didn’t know how it was possible but you were falling for this man and QUICKLY at that 

he was just so ??$%@^! 

UGHHHH

“so let’s try one more time, and if you still can’t get it then we’ll push it to next week, a free extra lesson on me” 

eeeeek 

though the temptation to purposely fails was very intriguing indeed, you still had to try for the sake of it 

if you got it, you got it, and if you didn't well .... 

an extra week with jungkook it was :D 

“you ready?” 

you nod your head 

“1...2...” 

you float and begin to paddle, this time actually getting the hang of it !!!

you hear jungkook’s muffled voice from above the surface, “there you go!!” 

holy shit ! 

you officially knew how to swim !!! 

at least enough to save your own life if push came to shove 

once you were out of breath, you stand back up, a grin on both of your faces 

for jungkook it was hard not to tackle you in excitement so instead he settled for a very enthusiastic high five 

“you did it!” he cheers 

“ahhh!” you giggle like a child 

“from here on out, the rest is a piece of cake!” 

yay yay yay !!! 

“now let’s start working on deeper strokes, maybe we’ll even have time to throw in backstrokes!”

:////

noticing your changed expression, he awkwardly laughs while scratching his neck 

“or maybe not” 

this week was the final week of swimming lesson with jungkook

:(( 

last week’s lesson of treading water and perfecting your swim seemed to had gone by in literally the blink of an eye ! 

and so today was possible the last time you’d see jungkook unless you managed to grow the balls and ask him out once that clock hit 4, once you were no longer his “student"

by now you were 100% sure you liked the dude... like a lot 

and he was definitely someone you wanted to get to know outside of this pool 

you just weren’t sure if he liked you the same way 

you mean yeah there were definitely times that had you raising an eyebrow here and there, but you always excused it as him simply being a kind hearted person by nature 

because clearly his five star rating on the company’s website had to come from somewhere 

not that you checked or anything....

who were you kidding 

yes you did

your favorite review was the one that went..

“wow!! this dude is amazing !! came here for beginner lessons and even i found myself fawning for the dude , and i don’t even play for that side of the team !! not only were his lessons thorough, but he’s a very charming person ! 10/10 recommend!” 

and so you were stuck 

did he liked you or was he just treating you like he treated everyone?? 

“ahh y/n,” jungkook’s voice suddenly brings you back to reality 

“today’s our final lesson!” he announces, not sounding too sad

in fact he sounded excited  

damn :/ 

he playfully jumps into the pool, today being his so called “fun day” 

“so since today’s your last lesson i thought i could teach you how to do a.....” 

he pauses for dramatic purposes 

“SOmERSAuLT!!”

immediately your eyes light up 

ahhhhhHHHH!!!! 

you always wanted to learn how to do a somersault in water, remembering the number of times you’d look at your friend in jealousy whenever she did one 

“you ready??” 

eagerly you nod your head yes

“okay so the steps to doing a summersault is first of course, you need to take a deep breath” 

okayyyy 

“from there you tuck your chin to your chest, next you do the moment of the somersault by swinging your chest forward and gently kicking out your legs, so basically forming a ball and then kicking out.  naturally, if you have enough momentum, you’ll spin, but if you don’t just use your arms to complete it” 

“think you can give me a demonstration?” you innocently ask 

he winks at you, “of course i can” 

taking in a deep breath, he follows his own instructions, and you watch he perfectly executes his somersault 

“woahhh, that was so cool!” you say, even now finding the trick to be amazing 

“now i dont expect you to get it right away, so right now that you try i’m going tog hide you thought the movement so you get the gist of it” 

sounds fair enough 

you weren’t trying to drown on your last day either 

“okay, you ready?” 

“yes” 

“let’s get it!” 

taking a deep breath in, you feel jungkook’s hand get placed on your back, ready to push you so you could do the somersault 

“1...2...” 

and slowly you feel yourself spin with the help of jungkook, a smile already forming on your face 

“ahhh!” you smile big and wide, causing Jungkook to smile along with you 

“you think you’re ready to try it on your own???” 

“yes sir” 

“okay 1....2....” 

mustering up as much as force you possible could, you push yourself into ball and successfully do the somersault 

YUPPPPP 

WHOSE DOING IT LIKE YOU???!$%@$!

feeling an immediate rush of adrenaline, you begin to splash water all over once you come back up for air, declaring an all out water fight with jungkook 

soon the two of you are chasing one another, you now using your new swimming abilities to get away 

hehe 

you’re a swimmer 

:D 

the sound of jungkook’s infectious laughter fill the air and soon you feel him grab your waist at an attempt to stop you 

“gotcha” he says, and he turns you around to face him 

slowly each other’s heavy breathing becomes relaxed, and it’s as if you’ve felt a shift occur in what you considered your new “friendship” 

“so....” he awkwardly says, hands still wrapped around your waist 

his was was RED

like cherry tomatoes red 

this only makes you giggle 

if you had doubts before, you DEFINITELY didn’t have em anymore 

he liked you :)))) 

and you liked him :)))) 

and in ten minutes you were officially no longer his student so......

“there’s this new restaurant that opened near my place....” you say 

immediately his eyes light up 

“cancun eats?” 

you nod your head and he gives you a toothy grin 

“i was wondering if you’d want to go out some time...” you muster up the courage to ask him out 

%^@%!@&!@^&@%! = jungkook’s brain 

holy crap !!! 

you liked him!!! 

he wasn’t just delusional !!! 

“hello?? jungkook??” you laugh, waving a hand in front of his face for jungkook.exe had truly stopped working this time 

nodding his head yes like a child,  the two of you being to lean closer to another, the clear goal in mind being each other’s lips

because honestly you’d come this far now, might as well give him a .... 

“wait!” he suddenly interrupts  he glances at the digital clock on the wall, remembering your final lesson officially ends at 4

because no way in hell was he going to get fired for kissing a student on the clock 

3:59 

.....

4:00 

“okay now,” he smiles, and you only roll your eyes, happy to have taken up on those swimming lessons. 

a/n : i was gonna make this longer but this was always meant to be a small little head canon so :))) pls give this a like, comment, or a reblog if you enjoyed it !! (if u can of course) and my ask box is always open for whatever !! :)) see yall next time 💞

[sfb123]

Sapere Aude - Part 11

Book: The Royal Heir

Pairing: King Liam Rys x Queen Riley Brooks

All characters belong to Pixelberry.

Catch Up Here

Series Description: I developed a theory of what I think will happen in TRH Book 4, and I was encouraged by some very lovely people to turn my theory into a fic, so here it is. Basically, Riley is recruited to join the Via Imperii, this series will follow her as she joins them to try and bring them down from the inside, and all of the drama and bombshells she learns along the way. Sapere Aude is Latin for “dare to know” it seemed like an appropriate title.

Rating: PG-13 Adult language, discussions of death, conspiracy, blackmail, and other adult themes.

Warning: The Royal Heir Book 3 Spoilers all over the place.

Disclaimer: I have no current affiliation with any other Via Imperii themed stories. Any claims that I have pre-read anything are false.

Word Count: 2,909

A/N: First of all, I have a couple of new readers (hi, thank you, I love you) if this is your first Sapere Aude, stop here, go back, and start from the beginning. This series has a lot of bombs and surprises, so none of this is going to make sense, and it’s going to make it less exciting if you aren’t reading from the beginning. 

Sorry, another long wait for a chapter. I got stuck, and distracted, and like a million other things. The Choices Insider email last week kind of lit a fire under me. When I started writing this (in December) the plan was to have it finished before the last book came out, so I have like a month to get through this. I’m going full out on getting this completed now, I will be working on nothing but this until it is done, and am hoping to finish it in time for the next book to come out so that PB has plenty of time to steal my ideas. 

This chapter took a while for me to work through, but @jessiembruno was amazing and helped me every step of the way, and got like a million rambling text messages from me once the idea dam finally broke. And then pre-reading and leaving me some amazing love notes, and super helpful suggestions. She also kept encouraging me, and pushing me to work on it when my mind would wander into new ideas, or thoughts on some other random WIP that I started throwing together. I love you, and I am so grateful for this friendship that goes way beyond any of this. By the way, you are an AMAZING writer, and I will continue to shout it from the mountain tops as long as I live. 

As always with this series, I need to thank @txemrn for pre-reading. I was having SUCH a miserable day and feeling so shitty about myself (for non-fandom reasons), and your reactions to this chapter made me laugh out loud for the first time in what felt like forever. I appreciate you so much my dear friend. 

And of course, thank you @twinkleallnight for my beautiful series moodboard. 

Tags: Listed below, you know the drill. 

Liam exited the bedroom and walked toward the sitting area. He paused at the end of the hallway to observe his wife and his daughter sitting on the couch. Riley had her blouse in hand, sewing on the button Olivia sent her for her undercover mission. She was showing Eleanor how to sew, talking her through every stitch. The princess was watching and listening intently, taking in every word her mother said. 

He leaned his right shoulder against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest as he admired his family. He didn’t understand how it was possible to fall even more in love every time he looked at them. All he wanted in this world was their happiness and safety, and now here he was, sending his wife straight to the enemy. 

“Hi Daddy!” The angelic voice of his daughter pulled him from his thoughts. 

“Hi Princess. Are you being a good helper for mommy?” He lifted Eleanor off the couch and sat in her seat, placing her on his lap. 

“Best helper a girl could ask for.” Riley held her hand out, palm up, and Eleanor gave her a high five. 

Liam enjoyed the company of his family for a few more moments, before placing a kiss on his daughter’s cheek. “Alright Eleanor, why don’t you go play in your room for a little while? Mommy and daddy have to talk about grown up things.”

“Yes, daddy. Will you come play after?” 

“Of course, I believe I am owed a tea party.” He gave her a hug before setting her down and watching her run to her room. When she was gone, he turned his attention back to Riley. “How are you feeling, love?”

Riley cut the lingering thread from the button and placed her blouse on the table in front of them before responding. “I mean, obviously I’m nervous, but I’m optimistic that I’ll come back with something we can use. How are you feeling?”

He sighed and pulled her close to him, kissing the top of her head as it landed on his chest. “Riley, I love how much you worry about me, but let me worry about you right now. Let me be your support system. Tell me truly, how are you feeling?”

“I’m...I’m terrified.” She pulled back and looked him in the eyes, tears beginning to pool in her own. “I’m trying so hard to be strong, to put on a brave face, but this is fucking terrifying. We don’t know how deep it goes, we know some of the people that are involved, but how do we know that that’s everyone?”

“You’re right, there are a lot of unknowns, and that’s scary.” He cupped her face in his hands, wiping a falling tear with his thumb. “But I truly believe that we are going to end this. That you are going to end this. Don’t forget, you are the Champion of The Realm.”

“Yeah, but I’m sleeping with the guy who makes those decisions, he may have been a little biased.” She shrugged, half joking. 

Liam removed his hands, his expression becoming more serious. “Riley, that’s not funny. You have earned every single thing you have received since you arrived in this country, our country. I don’t ever want you to believe that my feelings for you overrule my judgement when it comes to your abilities. You are the strongest person I have ever met. If anyone can do this, it’s you.”

“IF anyone can do this. What if nobody can?”

“Then we will face the fallout together. Like we always do, like we always will. We are the King and Queen of Cordonia, Liam and Riley Rys. We are a force to be reckoned with.” He raised an eyebrow as he parroted back her reassuring words from a few nights before. 

She smirked at him. “Hey, no fair, you can’t use my own words to prove your point like that.” 

“Yes I can, old negotiation tactic.” He winked at her and stood from the couch reaching for her hand. “Come on, we still have the whole day ahead of us. Let’s go have a tea party with our daughter, then I’m taking my girls out for dinner.”

****

Two days later, Riley was sitting in the back of an SUV heading toward the Fierro Estate. She was doing her best to quell her nerves, but she couldn’t help her hands from fidgeting in her lap. 

“You seem on edge, ma’am. Is everything ok?” The sound of Mara’s voice cut through the silence, startling Riley. 

“Oh...yeah, I’m fine Mara. I’m just not really sure what to expect from this meeting. Last time I went to one of these events, I found out my mother in law wasn’t actually dead. I don’t know if I could handle another surprise like that.”

Mara chuckled at her concern. “Don’t worry your majesty, this is a simple strategy meeting followed by a dinner. You have met all of the members, so there will be no surprise guests this time around.”

Riley nodded and turned her head, watching the scenery pass by as they continued to their destination. Her mind was racing thinking about what this meeting would have in store. She practiced taking pictures with the pen, and activating the recorder she had sewn into her shirt. As they got closer to the estate, she felt her heart rate speed up, and the knot in her stomach tighten.

When they arrived, Riley was ushered into the grand room, which had been set up with a large table. The other members were standing around in small groups chatting until it was time for the meeting to begin. Riley fidgeted with the pen, twirling it in her fingers before lifting it to her face and tapping it against her chin and clicking it several times. She hoped it came off as a nervous habit, providing cover for the fact that she was actually taking pictures around the room. 

She gasped and nearly jumped out of her skin at the feeling of a hand gently being placed on her shoulder. She whipped around to see Eleanor smiling softly at her. “Riley dear, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“Oh, Eleanor. Hello.” Riley held her hand to her chest, trying to get her heart rate back to normal. “It’s ok, I’m just a little nervous. Not really sure what to expect from this meeting.”

“Don’t worry, I promise it’s just regular business, nothing earth shattering. Come on, it’s time to get this started, and you’re sitting next to me.” Eleanor wrapped her arm around Riley and led her to the table. The other guests took this as their cue to follow, as the meeting was about to get underway. As Riley sat, she adjusted her skirt and blouse, using the opportunity to activate the microphone embedded in her button. 

As the chapter president, Eleanor kicked off the meeting by greeting their newest member, Queen Riley, and explaining that she was there to help push their initiatives though with the King. Riley clenched her fist ever so slightly, a trick she used when she was trying to keep her expression neutral. They continued on, reviewing the minutes of the last meeting, it all seemed to be pretty mundane, things that wouldn't even necessarily cross hers or Liam’s desk. 

Then they opened up the floor to new business, and Neville stood to address the room. “I would like to revisit the Auvernal alliance.”

Riley was able to maintain her stoic expression, but her body tensed at the mention of Auvernal. She and Liam had made it perfectly clear that there would be no alliance. “I don’t believe there is anything to revisit there.” She chimed in. “King Liam and I determined that the alliance would not be beneficial for Cordonia.”

“Actually, I believe you determined the alliance would not be beneficial to you and your husband.” Neville rebutted, crossing his arms over his chest. “You didn’t want to marry off your daughter, you didn’t bother thinking of what the alliance could bring to our country.”

“Are you questioning the decisions of your monarchs? I urge you to remember your station, Lord Neville.” Riley raised an eyebrow and stood a bit taller. 

Neville scoffed at her threat. “And I urge you to remember that you may have slept your way to the top in Cordonia, but the Via Imperii is bigger than the monarchy, and in this society, I outrank you.”

“Well, if being the Queen doesn’t matter in this room, then there is nothing stopping me from coming over there and beating your a...”

“Ok ok ok, let’s all calm down here.” Eleanor grabbed Riley’s arm, stopping her from charging at Neville. “Let’s all sit down and have a rational conversation, weighing out the pros and cons of an alliance.” Riley and Neville both sat down and exchanged narrow glances. “Now Neville, since you have brought this proposal to the group, you will go first. Please explain to us your thought process on revisiting the alliance.”

Neville nodded and smirked at Riley. “It is clear that combining the financial security of Cordonia with the military strength of Auvernal would make us an unstoppable force. Besides, we need the extra protection given our country’s recent history.” He glared at Riley once again.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Riley huffed. 

“Look at the instability we have faced in recent years. Our crown prince abdicated, his successor, our current king, broke off a perfectly suitable engagement to marry a foreign commoner who was marred in scandal.”

“He released a statement that cleared that whole thing up. The scandal is irrelevant.” She could feel her cheeks heating up.

“Do you really think people stopped talking about it? You can’t really believe that it won’t be a part of your legacy as our Queen.” 

Riley slouched down in her seat. She knew she should remain composed, but bringing up the Tariq scandal hit a nerve that she didn’t know still existed. One of her biggest concerns in continuing her relationship with Liam, and accepting his proposal, was that his success as King would be overshadowed by the scandal she had faced. She had thought that after all these years, it would have been forgotten, but Neville bringing it up just brought everything back up and made her realize it would be something that was attached to her name forever. 

“Besides the personal problems our royal family has faced, there have been multiple attempts to overthrow them just within our own country. Sons of Earth, Duke Godfrey, Barthelemy Beaumont, just to name a few. Other countries are seeing this, and it won’t be long before they try to come for us as well.” Neville continued. 

“While I don’t agree with his delivery, Lord Neville does make some valid points.” Emmeline interjected, the rest of the room began murmuring in agreement. Riley couldn’t hide her shocked expression as she felt tears start to build up in her eyes. She blinked them away, she was not going to give them the satisfaction of seeing their queen cry. 

Eleanor took back control of the room before turning to Riley. “Riley, would you like to counter? You and Liam worked directly with Auvernal during the marriage alliance talks, you clearly have some insight that we may not be privy to.”

Riley took a deep breath to get her emotions under control before standing to address the room. “Aside from the fact that Bradshaw and Isabella are deplorable people with hell spawn children, the main reason that we decided an alliance was not in the best interest of Cordonia, was because it was clear that their interest was not an alliance, but a hostile takeover of our country.”

“Perhaps we would prosper under their rule. I haven’t heard of any coup attempts in Auvernal, it seems to me like they’re doing something right.” Neville spoke up. 

“So that’s it then? You all think Bradshaw and Isabella would do a better job as your king and queen, so I’m just supposed to convince Liam to relinquish the throne?” Riley threw her hands up in frustration and stepped away from the table. 

“Your majesty, we’re not making the final decision right here, right now, we just want to remain open to the idea and explore some options.” Emmeline tried to talk Riley down. “Perhaps you and King Liam could take a meeting with them, a friendly lunch maybe, just to open the lines of communication.”

“This is ridiculous. I can’t believe you all expect me to agree with this!” Riley was now pacing the room, overcome with a nervous energy.

Eleanor stood and lifted a hand to quiet the room. “Alright, that’s enough. I think we’ve gotten as far as we’re going to get with this conversation tonight. Dinner is being set out in the dining hall. I suggest we adjourn for the day. Let’s all compose ourselves and think about all sides of this conversation. We will pick up the conversation at the next meeting.”

As the members started filing out of the room, Eleanor approached Riley and gently placed her hand on her arm to keep her still. “Are you alright Riley?” 

Riley shrugged Eleanor’s hand off of her, anger clear on her face. “Of course I’m not alright. I basically just had a room full of my subjects telling me that my husband and I are doing a shitty job, and they think those monsters are better suited to look out for their best interests. Of course I’m not fucking alright!” Riley moves in closer, lowering her voice but not losing any of the anger in her tone. “I thought you were here doing this to protect Liam. Do you really think that this is protecting him? Handing his kingdom over to Auvernal?!”

“Riley, I always have Liam’s best interests at heart, I promise you that. Why don’t you head home, take a couple of days to relax and take everything in. I will set up a meeting for you and I later this week to talk about everything and work out a game plan.”

“Fine, I can’t stay here anymore anyway. And I definitely don’t have an appetite for dinner.” Riley walked out of the room, looking for Mara so that they could get back to the palace. She stepped into the dining area and saw Mara standing in the far corner talking to Neville. She clenched her jaw and took a deep breath before approaching the pair. “Mara, we will not be staying for dinner. We are returning to the palace immediately. I want to be home to put my daughter to bed.” She wasn’t going to give Neville the satisfaction of knowing she was leaving because of what he started. 

“Of course, your majesty.” Mara nodded and exited with Riley. 

The ride home was silent. In all the years that Mara had worked for Riley, she had never seen her this upset. She wasn’t entirely sure how to handle it, or what would be considered overstepping her duties, so she decided to stay quiet and let Riley speak, if she wanted to. She didn’t. 

They arrived at the palace and walked together to the royal quarters. As Riley placed her hand on the doorknob to enter, Mara cleared her throat to get her attention. “Your majesty, I know this was a difficult evening for you, but I do feel I need to remind you that discretion is key in the Via Imperii. His majesty cannot know what happened tonight. You will need to lock those feelings away for the time being.”

Riley pressed her lips into a thin line and nodded. She knew she was going to fall into Liam's arms and cry the second she saw him, and then she would tell him everything, but she couldn’t let Mara know that. “Liam and I will be staying in for the rest of the night. You are dismissed for the evening.” Riley walked into her quarters and shut the door before Mara had a chance to respond. 

As soon as she closed the door, she leaned back against it and dropped her head into her hands. Liam came walking into the room, the smile that appeared on his face when he heard the front door open quickly faded as he took in the sight of his wife sobbing at the front door. “Riley?” She looked up at him, tears streaming down her face as she tried to catch her breath. He rushed over to her and pulled her close, she buried her head in his chest as he stroked her hair and kissed the top of her head trying unsuccessfully to soothe her. “Shhhh, it’s alright love, I’m right here, I’ve got you. Tell me what happened.”

Riley could barely speak, but she slowly tried to explain everything that had happened that night. Liam walked her to the couch as she spoke, she needed to sit, anything to help her relax and calm down. He stared at her in disbelief as he listened to his wife tearfully recap her evening. 

On the other side of the door, Mara pulled her phone out of her jacket pocket, selecting one of the contacts and bringing the phone to her ear. “My lord, you were right. We will need to put your plan in motion.”

Permatag:

@anjanettexcordonia @athena-penrose @bbrandy2002 @chemist-ana​ @choicesficwriterscreations​ @choiceskatie​ @cordonia-gothqueen​ @cordoniaqueensworld​ @emkay512​ @gabesmommie1130​ @gkittylove99​ @hopelessromanticmonie​ @iaminlovewithtrr​ @jessiembruno​ @kat-tia801​ @khoicesbyk​ @kingliam2019​ @lucy-268​ @marshmallowsaremyfavorite​ @mile9213​ @mom2000aggie​ @pixie88​ @queenrileyrose​ @secretaryunpaid​ @sweatyrysconnoisseur​ @tessa-liam​ @theroyalheirshadowhunter​ @twinkleallnight​ @txemrn​

Sapere Aude:

@burnsoslow @busywoman @gardeningourmet @ofpixelsandscribbles

Liam x Riley:

@jared2612

Liam:

@amandablink @yourmajesty09

[ordinaryschmuck]

What I Thought About "Through The Looking Glass Ruins" from The Owl House

Salutations, random people on the internet who most certainly won’t read this! I am an Ordinary Schmuck! I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons!

When Disney announced episode titles/synopsis for the new season (On a day that left my head SPINNING!), there was one episode that I knew deep down that would cause controversy and discourse amongst the fandom. And that episode was "Through the Looking Glass Ruins." Not because it would be bad, far from it. Instead, because the episode was a Gus episode with a Lumity subplot, that meant that discourse would start as fans decide which story they prefer more. A situation that, might I add, would result in no winners.

Do you prefer the Lumity plotline? Well, guess what! You're a racist who chose to talk about an overrated ship rather than a heavily underrated character who just so happens to be a person of color.

Do you prefer Gus' plotline? Well, guess what! You're a homophobe who decided to shine a light on a character who's underrated for a reason instead of praising a ship that just so happens to involve two girls.

Either side you pick is going to result in making people mad. The only way to avoid that is by explaining in heavy detail that you still enjoyed one side despite preferring the other. Even if you loved both, you'll most certainly have to explain to everyone that you mean it and that you're neither racist nor homophobic. And all I have to say is this: F that.

F that S in the A right now.

Because I, or anybody else for that matter, shouldn't have to explain myself when it comes to saying why I prefer one plot line or the other. I shouldn't have to prevent getting ripped apart by some bulls**t, black and white mentality of people who can't accept that others like a show for different reasons than they do.

You wanna know what I think about "Through the Looking Glass Ruins?" Well, continue reading to find out. You'll have to make your way through spoilers, but it's the only way for you to learn why I consider this episode not worth any discourse that I'm already certain is cropping up.

Now, let's review, shall we?

WHAT I LIKED

The Opening Scene: I'm kind of digging how snappy and to the point these opening scenes are getting. In the span of what has to be less than a minute, we're given all the information we need to know: Gus is insecure about his illusion magic because he accidentally got Willow injured. It's a great way of setting up why Gus wants to prove himself to the Glandus students and a great way of showing how much Willow's friendship means to him. Look at how he's reacting a few days after the incident. He's still mopey and guilty about it, and I feel bad for the little guy.

Gus in General: And while we're already talking about him, let's give this episode a round of applause for giving Gus the spotlight without having him screw over his friends...except for Willow.

"Through the Looking Glass Ruins" really fleshes Gus out much more so than past episodes. As I said, it plays heavily into his own insecurities while proving how he's capable as an illusionist. He's also the best possible outlet to explore more about what illusionist magic can really do. It can't hurt anybody or work well in a fight. Instead, its strengths lie in the act of convincingly tricking others into thinking that something that should be fake is actually real. And Gus got to prove he really is a super witch because of his illusions through a jaw-dropping scene that's as dark as it was enthralling. The fact that he did it all by himself, without the help of an illusion elder who was right there, is honestly even more impressive. A lot of people aren't that interested in Gus as a character, but I feel like, after this episode, he certainly won a few more fans over.

Willow Getting Injured and Missing the Episode: This is a smart move, in my opinion. Willow acts as the voice of reason in the friend group, so if she tagged along with Luz and Gus right away, she would have easily talked Gus out of joining the Glandus kids on a dangerous quest. I love Willow, she's a solid character, but writing her out is really the only way the plot could have progressed.

(I also love that she wasn't mad in the slightest over Gus getting her hurt. She has every right to be, but she also understands that it was an accident, and Gus wouldn't do anything to purposefully hurt her. And that's sweet!)

King’s Prerecorded Message for Gus: That's just adorable. We need more cute friendship moments between these two, DAMN IT!

Gus Being Sick of Luz’s S**t: Of all the characters I expected to get sick of the whole Lumity situation, Gus wasn't really one of them. I'd always thought it'd be Willow, primarily because the rest of the fandom latched onto that idea, but for Gus, I'd figured he'd be more supportive rather than annoyed. That being said, seeing him call Luz out for borrowing his library card to see Amity (Not ask her out. Just to see her) is not only a hilarious moment for Gus but also an adorable moment for Luz. It's something I would never have seen coming, but now that I have it, I want more. GIVE ME MORE!

(Sorry if I'm being a little intense)

Luz Trying to Cheer Up Gus: It's moments like this that prove why Luz is my favorite character.

Willow might have the most common sense out of the group, but it's Luz who still has the biggest heart. She knows her friend is down in the dumps, so Luz pulls out all the stops in cheering him up. Whether it's researching the first-ever human (really surprised he wasn't the tiniest bit excited about that, by the way) and lending him glyphs for his mission to help show up Mattholomule. She may be slow in the romantic relationship department, but episodes like this prove that she excels with a platonic friendship.

Bria: I consider Amar adorably optimistic, and I have no strong feelings for Gavin, one or the other. But with Bria? Holy hell, did the writers do everything they should with her!

At first, it seems like she'll be a generic nice girl for Gus to have a crush on. Only for that writing to be a perfect twist into how she's kind of the worst. You see hints of her true personality in the overly sweet way she threatens to force Amar to eat a bug he gets distracted by. A viewer's initial reaction to that would be to think that while she's sweet, she still means business. But no, it's actually a perfect way to reveal her true intentions while hiding them at the same time. Bria may be rotten to the core, but with how perfectly executed this twist was, I can't help but adore her contribution.

Mattholomule: ...I would sooner expect to have gone insane before believing that this little s**t weasel would make his way onto my good side. Despite that, here we are in episode five of the new season, and I like Mattholomule now.

The reveal that Glandus High forces students to believe that the strong survive and the weak are inferior explains so much for Mattholomule's thirst for power in "Something Ventured, Someone Framed." It doesn't excuse his actions, not by a long shot, but it definitely paints a clearer picture. It also explains his treatment of Gus, as well as Mattholomule's reasoning to help him. Because of Glandus High inserting a "the strong survive" mentality into Mattholomule, he belittles Gus due to thinking that illusion magic makes Gus weak. But after seeing how they're both stooges to Bria's mistreatment, he's quick to apologize and willingly helps Gus out. In the process, the two of them create a believable and cute friendship...a friendship that is absolutely going to be interpreted as something else by the fandom...which is something that I'm more than supportive of--HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?! I WENT FROM ONE OF THE BIGGEST GUSTOLOMULE DENIERS TO ONE OF ITS SUPPORTERS IN LESS THAN A DAY! HOW DO THESE WRITERS MANAGE TO TAKE ELEMENTS THAT WERE ONCE ON MY S**T LIST TO THEN MAKING ME MORE THAN OK WITH THEM!

IT'S INSANE!

Mostly impressive.

BUT ALSO INSANE!

Edric and Emira: More so than ever, I am so happy that the writers took their course correction with Edric and Emira. These two work so much better as supporting characters rather than minor antagonists like several fans thought they would be after their treatment of Amity in "Lost in Language." They're quick to pick up on Luz and Amity's mutual affections for one another and do their part to help their friend and baby sister out. It's wholesome to watch, and, you know what, I'm gonna go ahead and say it: Edric and Emira Blight are much better mischievous twin characters than Fred and George Weasley. As much as I adore Fred and George, there is an issue how they're always referred to as Fred and George, not Fred or George. It's because their personalities are as identical as they are, so separating them is pointless. With Edric and Emira, they have enough individuality that you could enjoy them separately as much as you could seeing them together. Emira is more emotionally supportive in how she listens to Amity vent her frustrations about her feelings, while Edric is more of a doofus who can't take a hint to save his life. It creates a great set of characters who can potentially work well on their own. I hope they get explored more at some point, but for now, I'm happy with the cute moments these two offered already.

Lumity Moments: BUUUUUUUUUUUUT, nothing compares to the cuteness of these two.

I don't care if I'll be called a racist for it because these! Moments! These moments are the highlights of "Through the Looking Glass Ruins" for me! Seeing these two interact in this episode, now that the pining is mutual, was everything I could have ever hoped for, and so much more. Seriously, how can you complain about anything about all of this when you get cute bits like:

Luz getting flustered of seeing Amity with her hair down

Amity risking her job to help Luz

Amity being motivated to find the diary due to the possibility of a date with Luz in the human realm

Luz going through hell and back to get Amity her job back

All of the blushing

And that F**KING KISS AT THE END HOLY SH--Don't you dare think I'm not going to further discuss that. DON'T YOU DARE!

Gus' story was entertaining with how it surprised me in all the right ways, don't get me wrong. But seeing Luz and Amity's relationship develop more and more always fills my heart with glee that, believe it or not, I'm always going to remember it more. I love you, Gus, but I love Lumity more.

Philip Whittabeen: So we finally have a name to the alleged human who was here years ago, and we get properly introduced to him through a really visually appealing animation change. I'm personally curious to see where the writers go with him, but it's too early to say if his inclusion will be worth something. But I will say one thing, though. One thing, and then I'm going to move on.

Here it is:

Philip sounds eerily similar to Emperor Belos to me.

That is all I'm going to say about that.

Luz’s Sentences in Spanish: I want to give a personal shout-out to mi buen amigo @l-egionaire for pointing this out because there are some things to analyze in what Luz says in Spanish in this episode. Knowing what she means, it's clear that they are ideals that Camila instilled into Luz. Ideals that possibly show a lot about Camila's personality on top of revealing where Luz got her hopeful optimism and sense of determination. It's the second sentence that Luz says later on that I really want to delve deep into:

"Nada funcionará a menos que lo haga funcionar."

Translated, that means "Nothing will work unless you make it work." Again, this proves the dedication that Luz has filled into her soul, but to me, it says a lot about Luz's dedication to Amity. She wants to make this relationship work but fully understands that it won't unless she puts in the effort. It's a sweet sentiment that says so much about how Luz feels about Amity that some fans might not be able to pick up on if they don't speak Spanish. Or, in my case, have a good friend who finds the translation for you (thanks again @l-egionaire).

The Galderstones: Pretty interesting concept, I'm not going to lie. It's also interesting that of all the types of witches in the Boiling Isles, it was illusionists who were the ones that guard over the Galderstones. Because illusion magic can't really harm anyone, it makes a weird type of sense that they would be the ones to keep the Galderstones out of the wrong hands. And, even better, it showcases Gus' strength as an illusionist when he was able to take down Bria, who was hopped up on Galderstone power, through that same "harmless" magic. It just goes to show that if you have a big enough brain, you don't need to overpower somebody. You need to outthink them.

Malphus Being a Surprisingly Cool Dude: What can I say? I'm a sucker for expectation subversion.

Luz and Amity Crying: First of all, a HUGE round of applause to VAs Sarah-Nicole Robles and Mae Whitman through their vocal performances in this scene! They really sold how upset and broken apart Luz and Amity were due to their feelings for each other messing things up. More so with Sarah-Nicole.

Second, this might be the closest these two have gotten to a confession so far ("so far" being the keyword). I specifically latch onto Amity's expression after hearing Luz agree that she's always weird around Amity. In one way, it looks like Amity is surprised to see she made Luz cry, but in another, it could be that she realizes that perhaps that Luz has feelings for her as well. Or, at least, that's how I interpreted things. The thing about art is that there's no one interpretation to agree on. And that's what this scene is: Art. It's performed, written, and animated well, that no matter how you look at it, it's a masterpiece.

“I’ll call the hounds”: One line. One line was all it took for me to love the Keeper of the Looking Glass Graveyard.

Amity Dyes her Hair: I always assumed that Amity would let her original hair color grow out as defiance to Odalia. But dying it lavender? Thus crafting her own identity without having her be compared to either Odalia or Alador?

...yeah, that's brilliant. Whoever thought of that, you are a genius and deserve all of the credit that comes from it.

ALL of the credit.

Amity Kisses Luz on the Cheek!: I'll save my "Wha-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo" for an actual kiss, but for now, THIS IS AWESOME!

This moment, much like other Lumity moments, was everything I could have ever expected and so much more:

Amity's instant panic after realizing she seriously just did that

Ed and Em looking fondly at their sister taking such a big step

The look on Luz's face, which may or may not hint that she realizes that the feelings are more than mutual

And the fact that Luz's legs give out soon after Amity leaves

It was adorable as all forms of hell, and it was a perfect way to end such a perfect episode...or, at least, an almost perfect episode. I do have some issues.

WHAT I DISLIKED

Mattholomule Helping Gus too Easily: The Glandus kids were right there, in-ear and eye-shot, yet did nothing as Mattholomule effortlessly helped Gus and the Keeper escape...how?

Gavin falling for Gus’ Illusion: I want to laugh at how stupidly easy that was...but it's too stupidly easy for me to forgive.

And that’s about it. Just two nitpicks that don’t really take away that much enjoyment from the episode

IN CONCLUSION

"Through the Looking Glass Ruins" keeps Season Two's winning streak going by being another solid A. It fleshes out characters, develops cute relationships, and keeps the story going despite being so character-driven. It's easily more than worth the time...but it's not worth any discourse that comes from some fans preferring one plot over the other.

I highly doubt that some people are racist for loving the Lumity plotline or homophobic for loving Gus'. Maybe some people are, but also consider that maybe, just maybe, a person loves a ship because it's their favorite, or a person likes a character cause he's their favorite.

Which.

Is.

Fine.

There's no definitive way to like a series, and demanding that people like it for the same reasons you do is not worth anything. Because, believe it or not, even Dana Terrace doesn't care how people love her show. In the AMA she did, when a fan asked if she's upset about fans obsessing over Amity's crush on Luz, this is her word for word reaction:

"Not at all! No, the main focus of the series will never be on any romantic thread but that doesn't mean those threads aren't important. And I'm thrilled that people connect to our characters!"

THERE YOU HAVE IT! The creator herself fully admits that she doesn't care what fans latch onto. She's just glad to have people who like the show in the first place! So don't create discourse just because some people enjoy a part of an episode more than others. The second you get that through your heads, the sooner we can all move on with our lives.

(Also, that's five episodes in a row that are hits. And, man, is that stinker going to hit harder because of it.)

[rachelbethhines]

Tangled Salt Marathon - Rapunzel’s Return Part 1

We’ve finally made to season three and the entire reason why I made this review series. This season features some of the worst writing I have ever witnessed in a television program. And this season kicks off with the third worst episode of the whole series. Rapunzel’s Return is the iceberg that sinks this show and manages to assassinate everyone’s character.

 Everyone’s.  

Summary: Inside the House of Yesterday's Tomorrow (as seen off screen in "Rapunzeltopia"), Cassandra is greeted by the Enchanted Girl, a spirit who reveals that Cassandra is the biological daughter of the late Mother Gothel, who abandoned her on the night she kidnapped infant Rapunzel. Enraged that Rapunzel has been (unknowingly) overshadowing her for the entirety of her life, and that she will always be unfairly overlooked, Cassandra snatches the Moonstone Opal, absorbs it, and declared Rapunzel's destiny as her own. She manages to escape from the group and cuts all ties with them, with Rapunzel unable to wrap her head around the entire situation. The group returns to Corona and find that it has been taken over by Varian, who has aligned himself with Andrew and the Separatists of Saporia to erase the King and Queen's memories and enslave Corona's citizens.

Plot Hole Number One: Why Would Cassandra Just Blindly Follow A Ghost While Trapped Inside a Haunted House? 

Outside of that one snarky remark, Cassandra never stops to question the literal ghost who is bossing her around. The ghost she met in a creepy haunted house. A haunted house that she was already suspicious of before ever going in and that has tried to kill her and her friends many times now. 

Cassandra, the most distrusting and cautious of of individuals in the show thus far, just suddenly decides to leave her brain behind from this point forward for no given reason whatsoever. 

If you have to dumb down your main character and have them behave OOC in order to get your plot rolling along, then you haven’t a good plot. 

Plot Hole Number Two: Cassandra Sees for Herself How Awful Gothel Was to Her Here, So Why Would She Obsess Over the Woman? 

Forgetting for a moment that Cass very well knows that Gothel treated her best friend like shit and tried to murder her other friend, Eugene, as evidenced by Quest for Varian; Cassandra can see for herself right here that Gothel is a crap person who never treated her right. 

I mean there’s denial, and then there’s flat out stupidity. Cass being hurt by the this reveal is one thing. Cass believing that Gothel really loved her and blaming everyone else for her death is totally another and not based in any kind of sensible logic.     

Plot Hole Number Three: Why Would Gothel Even Have a Child to Begin With? 

Look, I’ll accept that the flower can deage Gothel enough for her to get laid and bare a kid, but that only brings up the question of why she would keep said kid? 

She kept Rapunzel cause she needed her powers in order to stay alive, but Cass? What reason would she want to have Cassandra around? A baby can’t do chores for you and it's a hell of a lot of work to raise one. Plus the show repeatedly tells us over and over again that Gothel doesn’t really love her or even likes having her daugther around so... yeah, what is the point of this? Why didn’t she just drop Cass off at an orphanage to begin with?  

You can’t make this type of reveal and have it go against the what we fundamentally know about the characters without explaining why they would partake in such actions.  

This is Manipulative Writing 

But of course the real reason why this flashback and “twist” exists is just to manipulate the audience into feeling sorry for Cass. It’s not here to actually enhance the story, further the characters, nor answer any mysteries in any real way. That’s why it’s such a poor plot point. 

It’s setting up the viewers to have a bias so that they’ll more readily forgive Cassandra for her irreprehensible actions later. In short, it’s the same bullshit that the writers pulled for Frederic back in season one. Only it makes even less narrative sense here because this ‘tragic backstory’ is so divorced from later events in the story. 

It’s also flat out lazy because all it’s doing it slapping Rapunzel’s backstory onto Cass instead of letting Cassandra be her own character with her own battles and character development to have. 

And before you say, “well that’s the point”, then let me tell you it’s a stupid point. One that makes zero sense for the character and is insulting to the audience’s intelligence.    

Plot Hole Number Four: Why Didn’t Gothel Just Stay Hidden Till the Soldiers Left? 

Hell, why did Gothel even come back here? We already established that she doesn’t really care about Cass and it’s a plot point that’ll only be further reiterated as the season goes on, so why? Why would Gothel behave like this? How does this help her in her goal? Gothel’s suppose to be smart remember? 

Plot Hole Number Five: How Does Any of This Logically Help Zhan Tiri? 

So Zhan Tiri is the blue ghost girl and while the series tries to keep it a secret reveal for later, it’s pretty obvious from the get go, so I’ll just be calling the character by her name. 

Anyways, Zhan Tiri’s plan is to show Cassandra her past, in order to make Cass angry enough to steal the moonstone and fight Rapunzel, so that the two powers fighting each other will then release her from her interdimensional prison. 

Now ignoring how literally none of that was set up nor previously established, and ignoring that Zhan Tiri’s disciples were trying previously to stop the sundrop and her friends from getting to the moonstone, thereby undermining their master’s plan; just how exactly is any of this suppose to work? 

Why would showing Cassandra how her mother was a shitty person somehow make Cass angry at Rapunzel, angry enough to try and kill her even, and somehow keep her angry for months on end, in order to fulfill this clearly illogical action that holds no personal benefit to herself?    

I don’t mind Cassandra becoming a villain; I just want it to make sense. 

This does not make sense. 

Not only does it require incredible leaps of logic and Cassandra acting out of character to work, it also depends far to much upon conquincidence and things playing out just in exactly the right way to benefit Zhan Tiri and her poorly laid out plan. 

Would it not have made more sense for this “evil master manipulating worlock” to just, you know, lie? 

Like shouldn’t she be trying to make Gothel look good? Shouldn’t she be trying to make it all seem like Frederic’s fault  (which it mostly is anyways)? If you want Cass to attack Corona and turn against Rapunzel, then why not lie about their involvement or tell some half truth?

Or better yet why not make Gothel and actual complex figure for real? 

Ugh... I got to move on from this point, but believe me, we will be back to this dumbfuckery in later episodes. 

Plot Hole Number Six: You Can’t Just Ignore that Cap Exists and Is the One Who Raised Cassandra for Most of Her Life 

Like I’m sure finding out that you mom was a piece of crap who abandon you hurts, but that doesn’t automatically erase the fact that Cass’s dad was there for her, raised her, and loved her for the majority of her life. I’m not saying that Cap is perfect, but he at least tried to do right by her (and is consequently the best parent in the show) and Cassandra is old enough to recognize that fact. Pretending otherwise is a disservice to everyone. It’s a disservice to the Captain, to Cassandra, to Rapunzel, to Gothel, and to the viewers watching along with this BS. 

Trauma Doesn’t Make You Suddenly Stupid 

Look, I’m not downplaying Cass’s trauma here. She is allowed to feel upset and yes trauma is painful and effects us all in different ways. Also yes, past trauma can carry on through into adulthood and still harm you. 

However that’s not an excuse for hurting others. Cass’s trauma isn’t any less traumatic than any of the other characters’, but neither is it somehow more important than any of theirs. She doesn’t get a free past to step on people just because she was sad once. 

Cassandra is, once again, old enough to know this and more importantly smart enough to realize that what happened in the past, if even true, has nothing to do with what she is currently dealing with right now. 

Like why is she believing any of this? Why is she still listening to the suspicious ghost that she met in a magical house that’s tricked her and her friends numerous times before? Why would finding out her mom was shit make her turn that anger against her best friend? What does any of this have to do with her current struggles with trying to build up her career or staying friends with Raps? 

Remembering past trauma does not make your brain shut off. Even having a mental breakdown or panic attack still does not render you completely senseless and anything done under extreme pressure like that is temporary. You don’t wind up acting bananas constantly for over a year. 

As a woman who suffers from complex-PTSD and is an abuse survivor myself, Cassandra’s story is deeply offensive to me. Not the least of which because it actively dumps her down. 

This Is the Point Where Cassandra’s Character Gets Assassinated 

Like I said in the opening, everyone’s character gets assassinated in this story. Cassandra just happens to be the first to die and it’s right here with this line. 

Not only is this line incredibly cringy and poorly worded, and I have to just feel sorry for the VA here cause there’s no way to make this much stupid sound good, but it’s also completely divorced from what’s going on. 

Cassandra is suppose to be explaining to her friends why she’s stealing the moonstone and her answer is “I’m this dead bitch’s daughter”? Like oookaaay, and that has what to do with it exactly?

Did Gothel have any connection to the moonstone? Does stealing the moonstone somehow bring her back or fulfil her revenge? What does grabbing the moonstone actually gain Cass and what does that have to do with her dead abusive mom? 

The reason why Cass doesn’t work as a villain because she has no goal nor reason for doing what she does. She just lurches from plot point to plot point with no idea of what she is doing nor why she is doing it. 

But watch as the show keeps digging in its heels and keeps insisting that Cassandra’s connection to Gothel is totally a sympathetic motive even as it makes less and less sense every damn time it's brought up. 

What Does Destiny Even Fucking Mean Any More???

What Destiny?!

There is no damn destiny. There is no prophecy to fulfil, no world to save, no consequence for just having everyone sitting on their asses for two whole seasons. And even if there was a destiny to even steal; why would Cass even want it? What does actually she gain from any of this? And how does any of it connect back to Gothel? 

This Should Have Been the Point of Resolution Not the Inciting Incident for Their Break Up

Look no idea is without merit. You can make the stupidest sounding idea engaging if you present it right. 

This was not presented right. 

If Cassandra being Gothel’s daughter was to hold any meaning to the story, then it needed to be what brought her and Raps back together again, not what broke them apart. 

Rapunzel says it right here. Logically this should be common ground for the two of them. There’s no real reason for Cass to direct her anger at Rapunzel over this. 

But this show doesn’t care about logic, reason, or treating it’s audience with intelligence. It’s just flashy bullshit “drama” that pretends to be deep but is really a shallow puddle once you stop to think about it for two seconds.   

Let’s Talk About “Sisters” 

Cass’s face just says it all doesn’t it? 

The creator, Chris, wanted to make a story about two “sisters”, because he has two daughters and he thought that would be inspiring and speak to little girls everywhere. 

It’s a nice sentiment. Shame he’s so utterly incompetent at it. 

There was no build up to them being sisters. Instead all we got was a bunch of meaningless parallels and a very toxic friendship. Even with the Gothel reveal the connection to them being siblings is tenuous at best because there’s no biological relation and more importantly, they weren’t raised together.   

Chris is basically trying to rip off the likes of Frozen or Guardians of the Galaxy here with Raps and Cass’s relationship but it doesn’t work when the two siblings in question didn’t actually grow up together. There’s no reason for Cassandra to project her anger at their abusive parent on to Raps because that parent wasn’t the one to actually raise her. And on top of that, said abuser is dead, and both her and Raps have separate guardians in their lives, so the jealousy angle doesn’t work either.  

And to make it all the more confusing, Chris failed to inform his crew of this brilliant plot twist, so we now have two seasons of gay baiting put in by the storyboard artists hitting that Cass is in love with her “sister”, And because the hardcore Cazzpunzel stans are the only fanbase that hasn’t given Chris the boot, there’s still even more gay baiting to come. 

Why are We Victim Blaming a Baby? 

Seriously, Cass? You are twenty four and have a brain. Why are you blaming someone for being kidnapped as a baby? What kind of sense does this make? 

Worse, there’s plenty of real shit Cass could get angry at Rapunzel over and this is what you go with show? 

If anything Rapunzel should be the one who is pissed here. Cass got to escape and lead a normal life with a loving father all because she got kidnapped as baby. And now said bitch is trying to gaslight her while stealing the very thing she’s been risking her life to grab for a year now. 

No You Haven’t Cass

Once again, you got to live a normal life with a loving Dad. You had plenty of chances to build relationships and further your career for 18 years while Rapunzel was trapped in a dang tower, and Rapunzel returning from said tower didn’t cut you off from anything. In fact Rapunzel being rescued from the tower actually presented more opportunities for you and you spent all of season one climbing up the ranks. 

There’s Nothing In the Show to Back Up This Statement 

Nothing is at stake. There’s no threat here other than Cassandra herself. Cassandra is dranger to the world here not the moonstone. If you wanted it to be the other way around then you should have kept the rocks active during season two. 

So Why Didn’t We Go With the Original Set Up From Season Two? 

As said before, there are real reasons that were set up during season two that could have motivated Cass. 

Rapunzel is irresponsible and can’t be trusted to save the world 

Rapunzel is a shit friend and Cass is better off going her own way and leaving everyone high and dry. 

Cass’s hand was injured by Raps and the moonstone might be able to heal it 

Cass sees the injustice in the class system and wants to fight back against the royals in order to help everyone, not just herself. 

Cass might believe she’s stopping Zhan Tiri and not realize she’s being manipulated by her instead

Or is playing along with Zhan Tiri under the idea that she can stall for time figure out how to stop her. 

Cass wants to play her and use the power of the rocks to save people only for it to go wrong later. 

Possession (which was the original idea in the concept stage) 

Like I said, there were plenty of ways to make this work. In fact some are so dang obvious that you’ll hear Cass fans try to claim that a few of those are what her real motivation was despite the the show clearly going against them later. The “fighting against the class system” is a real popular one despite the fact that Cass herself attacks a bunch of poor people repeatedly and doesn’t seem concerned about anyone but herself.  

But I digress. 

The real reason why we have this bullshit is cause Chris doesn’t want to hold his favs accountable. Rapunzel’s flaws can’t be called out in any meaningful way and Cass gets a convenient scapegoat in Zhan Tiri. 

In short both Cassandra and Rapunzel have their agency stolen away from them by the narrative, while still trying to pretend that they’re “strong independent women”. Even though those two things aren’t compatible at all.  

What Exactly Have You Been Denied Cass? 

Remember Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs? 

Lance, Eugene, and Lady Caine were all denied physiological and safety needs while growing up in an orphanage and then later on the streets as a thieves. 

Rapunzel was denied psychological needs while being raised by her abuser. 

Varian was denied everything on that dang list. 

Cassandra tho? 

Trauma or no trauma, Cass was still raised in a safe and loving environment for the majority of her life. She, at best, has been denied “self-fulfillment” needs and even then that’s a stretch cause throughout season one we see her time and time again gaining what it was she wanted. 

Cassandra isn’t anything special. She’s not suffered any more than anybody else in the show and in fact has lived a pretty cushy life when all is said and done, especially when compared to other characters in the show. 

The worst that she has to complain about is working a crappy job for a little while and having a shit mom that she can barely remember. Boo Fucking Hoo. 

Note How Easy It Is For Cass to Control the Rocks Here

The show can’t even keep Cassandra’s powers consistent. Like everything else about the character, Cass’s powers come and go as is convenient for the narrative with little explanation as to why. 

This Song Doesn’t Work Because It was Cut In Half Due to Time 

I’ve talked about the problems with this song before in my songs from TTS ranking list. It’s choppy and consistent. Yet it only feels that way because it was cut down. It’s missing a full other verse, second chorus, and a bridge.  

Which is inexcusable because there’s so much dang filler in this show! 

We could have had time for the full song if they had just cut one of the non-essential episodes and made all of this a full episode on it’s own. Just save the Corona and Varian stuff for later if need be. 

The management of this show is just atrocious.  

Why Wasn’t This the Cliffhanger for Season Two? 

Speaking of making all of the Cassandra stuff it’s own episode... Everything we just seen should have been in season two. 

It’s more connected to what happened last season, it flows better, it would have had more time to breathe, and it would have given us more time in the Dark Kingdom. Given as that this is what season two was building up too, it would have been more satisfying there.  

And if the writers still wanted a cliffhanger to end the season in order to draw crowds then this right here was it. 

So We We Spent A Whole Season Getting Here and We’re Just Going to Leave Now? 

The Dark Kingdom is Wasted!!!!

And because the Dark Kingdom is a bust, the entirety of season two now feels even more pointless. 

Chris said he cut the Dark Kingdom stuff because it didn’t interest him. 

Chris is a fucking fool. 

Ignoring that different people will gravitate towards different things and you need to keep that in mind when writing for mass audiences; you don’t spend valuable time setting things up just to drop them later. 

If you didn’t like that particular plot thread then you needed to just not bring it up to begin with. Once you’ve put it in there you need to commit to it. 

Behold the Only Thing Useful Shorty Does This Whole Season 

There is less Shorty overall this season which is ultimately a good thing, but it does highlight what a stupid decision it was to bring him along to begin with. 

I mean did we really drag him around for a whole season just for this? Couldn’t some other Pub Thung or townsperson have found them? One that could talk. 

Adria Gets Put on a Bus 

Adria doesn’t get assassinated like some of the other characters, but she does get unceremoniously shoved off without any real closure. The character will return later in the season, but brainwashed and without any lines. Which is doubly insulting to the VA who voices her. 

And Here Is Where Lance Gets Assassinated 

Lance is drastically dumbed down in season three. Even more so than in past seasons. You could call it flanderization specifically, more so than assassination, but the effect is the same. Lance’s character is effectively dead from this point onwards. 

Also this should have ended the Lance & Adria ship in the show for good. She flat out rejects him here, but nope. 

Eugene is the Only Person Acting Like a Real Human Being This Episode Thus Far

Edmund spent his whole life protecting the moonstone. He lost everything to it. He was convinced that letting Rapunzel take it would be best only for her to lose it right afterwards. And what does he do?  Immediately become the “comedicly bad dad” in show oversaturated with both comedic foils and poor father figures. 

Meanwhile Eugene is the only one properly responding to what is going on. Don't expect that to last. 

I Thought You Left Cass?

Remember that foreshadowing with Quirin way back in the pilot? 

This is just that, but dumber. 

There’s no reason for Cass to hang around out of sight only to stare menacingly at Rapunzel and company as they leave. It’s just a lazy hook to get viewers to believe that there might be more going on with Cass then what we’ve been told. There’s not.  

So This Map Proves That the Dark Kingdom Is North East of Corona 

Continuity and worldbuilding in this show is utterly garbage, so I’ll latch on to any little scrape of info that we get. 

According to the map shown here, the balloon is heading Southwest back to Corona. That means the Dark Kingdom is Northeast. 

So if Corona is somewhere in Northern mainland Europe that means the Dark Kingdom is either in a Nordic country (Norway,Sweden,Finland, ect) or Russia.   

Meta Jokes About Being a Bad Writer Doesn’t Excuse Bad Writing 

Get use to this. Season three is full of meansprited meta jokes that try to defend against the quite frankly valid criticism that the show has received. Or more specifically the criticism Chris had received. 

Most of season three was written during the hiatus of season two back when Chris was seeing backlash from the fans due to his PR fiasco and that’s not even taking into account the crew walkout after season one. 

Not only is that too late to be writing your final season, but it’s also reflective of how Chris can’t handle critique with grace nor listen to other ideas as jokes like this are in poor taste. 

Everyone Acts Shocked Here but Honestly this Fits King Frederic’s MMO

This is the same guy who prosecuted poor people for eighteen years with his crack down on crime, and thrented the life an orphaned teen. Is anybody really surprised by this? 

I Thought Your Real Name was Hubert? 

I guess he just prefers the name Andrew. I don’t know. But what do know is that “the devil is in the details” is a thing my animation teacher in college use to say repeatedly, and no one working on this show seems capable of remembering or keeping up with details. 

Why Are There Only Five Saporains? 

Saporia was set up as an entire race of people who’d been displaced from their homeland for generations. They’ve been living as nomads for centuries according to season two.  Why are there only five of them in this episode? 

How did they overthrow a kingdom with only five people? How do they maintain hold of it with only five? How do they expect to further their bloodline and culture with only only five of them?  

Why did we waste money on a bunch of one off villians that we sent packing in season two and not built more Saporian models instead? 

Like you could have had the core five here, as like leaders, and then imply that there are more of them with background citizens and guards ect. 

NO!!!

WE DO NOT IMPLY THAT A 15 YEAR OLD BOY WAS LOCKED IN A JAIL CELL WITH A GROWN MAN FOR NEARLY A YEAR!!!!!

I.... What?!

Who the fuck thought this was a good idea to put in a children’s show?

Did no one behind the scenes stop to think, “Hun, maybe we shouldn’t suggest that a teenager was trapped inside a small enclosed space with no way out twenty for hours a day with an adult who attempted to murder his girlfriend when lying to her stopped working. Perhaps someone might get the wrong impression.”? 

Like I hate censors as much as the next person, but editors work in the business for a reason, and that reason is to pull the artists aside sometimes and go “Hey, that shit don't fly with normal folk.” 

What’s worse is I don’t think the writers were even trying to be shocking and edgy here. I just think they were careless. They needed a quick exposition dumb to explain how Varian and Andrew know each other, and didn’t think through the implications of that line nor considered how Varian’s age changes the context of his situation. 

Which is beyond inexcusable because it’s so damn lazy! 

You wouldn’t need rushed exposition had you actually took the time to set up this plot point back in season two. Heck, you wouldn’t have needed to even set this plot point up had you not cut Varian’s original story out at the last minute. Finally, you should care enough about your characters to at least take their age into consideration when writing their development. 

There’s also the fact that it makes most of the ‘heroes’ look like assholes. 

We’ve seen these dungeons several times throughout the show. We know of their poor conditions. There’s little light, the food is slop, there’s no way to stay clean or use the restroom, prisons are never let out for exercise, ect. Like these are medieval style dungeons that are considered inhumane my modern audiences.  

Just because the show tries to play off the horribleness of it for laughs doesn’t mean the audience is going to find it funny that they traumatized a fifthteen year old with it.... again! 

Moreover Frederic had promised last time we saw him that he would give Varian help. He idea of ‘helping” Varian is supposedly to throw him into a nasty jail cell with a violent criminal? WTF? And there’s no indication that he tried anything to save Quirin either.

Not to mention that none of the mains act surprised by this revelation, nor comment about how awful Varian’s treatment is. As usual for them. 

It’s just sicking and most of the atempts to explain away this line by the fans have been super pathetic. 

“Frederic was giving him therapy while in jail” - there’s nothing to indicate therapy exists in this world and even if this were true it would be undermined by stupidly throwing him in a cell with Andrew. 

“It’s not literal, Varian was in a separate cell” - once again there’s nothing to back this up and even if that were the case it’s not that much better because it’s still a dungeon cell with zero privacy and Varian would still be close enough to Andrew to talk to him thus invading his personal space to some degree or other. 

“Well he tried to help but Varian wasn’t cooperative” -  still not an excuse and there’s nothing on screen to back up this headcanon. 

“It’s someone else’s fault.” - Who’s? Frederic is in charge of everything. The buck stops with him. If a guard did this without his knowledge then that means Frederic neglected his duties and his promise anyways. 

“Well maybe it’s true, but Varian did a bad thing and teens who do really bad things get sent to prison in the real world too” - Not an argument. Teens aren’t typically jailed with adults and the conditions for modern jails are at least somewhat better than those in Corona. Plus kids being sent to jail in any form is major topic of controversy in today's time. I’ve already covered why trying teens as adults is a vile abuse of power in the real world; I shouldn’t have to mention that the current government throwing children in cages is a bad thing as well! 

“Well that’s just part of the time period” - Doesn’t make it right, and sadly it’s not something in the distant past either. It’s currently happening right now in the US. It was happening when this episode and season was being written. The writers unthinkingly threw in a very real thing that affects hundreds of thousands of children and didn’t bother to follow up on it or comment about how wrong it is. 

There’s just no excuse for the way Frederic and Rapunzel treat Varian in this show. There’s just not, and some of y’all really need to stop trying to do so cause it means you’re inadvertently condoning real life abuses of power. 

You can like a character and except that they’ve done wrong. That’s a thing that you can do, you know. 

Let’s Talk about Character Design 

For the most part the art direction in the show is top notch. It really is the best looking animated show on tv today, and the character design is usually of this same quality. But they really dropped the ball with Varian’s design here. 

The structural bones of it isn’t bad. Taken on it’s own it would be fine, but good character design is supposed to give context and enhance the story and this doesn’t do that. 

We’ve haven’t seen Varian in a year, but instead of visually showcasing the passage of time by having him physically age we just get season one’s design but in bargain bin hot topic clothes and a drawn on barcode. 

Even the color palette is wrong. 

Varian’s is suppose to feature blues and earthy browns to go with his eyes and hair but instead we get bright reds, neon chimballs, and sharp contrasts with blacks and whites that just clashes with his base colors. 

And what does any of this tell the audience? How does it add to the story? What can we glean from his new design about what transpired in the last year?  

Nothing. 

At best it just reinforces that villian Varian is a try hard edge lord, but we already knew that. We would have known it even without the villain arc cause he’s a teenager. Not that he looks it. The boy is supposed to be either 16 or soon to be 16 and he still looks fucking 12.

What’s more they spent money on this. They made not one, but two new models with two new outfits, but they couldn’t be arsed just to make him a little taller? And no, he’s not actually any taller in season three. He was always Rapunzel’s height regardless of animation errors and squash and stretch techniques.  

It’s a waste. Just like nearly everything in season three. 

This Is Such a Cop-out

Speaking of things being a waste. Wiping Frederic’s and Arianna’s memories is taking the cowards way out. It’s them escaping any sort of meaningful consequence for their past actions and robs them of the chance to grow and develop as characters. All cause Chris didn’t want to deal with people pointing out the bullshit his self insert caused. 

Well guess what, I’m still pointing out Frederic’s BS, only now I’m extra angry cause I was robbed of a genuine character arc, so fuck you! 

Was Varian Actually Needed for This Plot?

No really. What does Varian even do here? The wand of oblivium is Saporian magic and they could and apparently did wipe the king’s and queen’s memories without Varian’s mindwipe concoction. That alone apparently gives them the power to run the kingdom.  

All Varian does is give them some alchemy based weapons and a bomb he accidentally invents. Both are things that the Saporians could have made themselves given how they know apothecary according to Rapunzel Day One.   

I’m currently in the middle of writing an AU fanfiction where Varian winds up in another world before the events of this episode, and let me tell you it is incredibly easy to write him out of the majority of season three without changing the plot much. 

Given how Varian is meant to be a main character this season, that’s not a good thing. 

So How Come None Of the “Heroes” Give a Shit?

Like I said above, none of the protagonists show the least bit of concern for what Varian is going through. Even though ignoring his needs is precisely what lead to this mess in the first place. It not only makes them look heartless, but it also makes them look plain stupid as well. 

Why is it so hard to just even pretend to care about the fact he’s been orphaned? Half of them are orphans themselves for fucks sake!  

Varian’s Not the One in Charge Here Rapunzel 

I know Varian is the bigger threat and has more of a personal connection to Raps, but it’s pretty clear that Andrew is the mastermind behind this coup. What good does shouting at Varian do? What makes Rapunzel think that any of the Saporians would listen to him even if he did change his mind? What makes her think ordering Varian around after she helped ruin his life would get him to change his mind. Like, my gosh is Rapunzel dumb! 

Why Are We Victim Blaming a Child Soldier?

That’s what he is at this point. He’s a weapons specialist for a rival kingdom fighting for control of the government. A government that has abused its own people leading to such an uprising. 

A teenager may not be as blameless as a baby but it's still beyond callous and cruel to blame kids and young teens who join extremist groups in war torn lands out of desperation.  

Is This Suppose to Be the Inciting Incident for Varian’s Redemption, Cause If So, That Makes No Sense  

This look of regret is the only indication that Varian is questioning where he stands before his redemption in part two. Except there he points out that he’s been thinking about it for while now, even before Raps showed up. Only there’s nothing to suggest why Varian would suddenly change his view point and motives. So the audience is still in the dark about his thought process even with this “hint” and I use that word loosely. 

Conclusion 

So that’s the end of part one. I hope to have part two up before the week is out. 

[forestdivinity]

Six of Crows: Review

After binge watching Shadow and Bones last night, I couldn’t stop myself re-reading Six of Crows.

Leigh Bardugo is a mastermind at writing heists. I thought this my first time reading Six of Crows and the second time through just reinforced my opinion. Six of Crows is a wonderfully written, well-paced, heist story that leaves you desperate for more.

First, the characters. A lot of books struggle to balance a larger cast, but Bardugo juggles them excellently, no character seems left out or forgotten about, every single one of them has a secret and story to tell. None of them are wholly good - in fact, many of them are the opposite - and yet they're sympathetic, addictive, the type of characters that you long to dig into and tear apart. I'd be lying if I said I didn't love Kaz. Sure, he's cruel, vicious, unrelentingly selfish (except in the few moments that he isn't) but he's also the type of anti-hero that I adore. There's a past that he doesn't want to confront, trauma after trauma forced into one teenage body, and of course the limp, the chronic pain. I relate to him, in a way. I know what it means to be angry, to want to rage against the world. I understand his pain, having walked with a cane multiple times in my life. I don't have his genius, his way with locks, or magician's tricks, but I've certainly tried to suppress my emotions, hidden behind a sharp tongue. At first, you're not sure if you should like Kaz Brekker, but Bardugo slowly (and excellently) breaks him apart for the reader and then you can't help but long to help him, if not save him. Inej is a beautifully complex character, a girl, a spider, a deadly force, one dedicated to her faith and to finding her family. She's 'exotic' without being fetishized by the reader because Bardugo spends pages exploring how she's fetishized in Ketterdam and by the entire world. For some people, Inej is little more than a Lynx to exploit and Bardugo exposes the dark undercurrent of the world, how it treats people who look different to us. Jesper, the last of the original Crows, is another favourite. A sharp shooter, a gambling addict, quick tongued and quicker to spring into action, how could I not love him? He reminds me of my own ADHD, the ever thrumming energy and how quickly I get hyper-fixated, drawn into a game. His revelation is something you don't expect at first and then, when you go back, you wonder how it wasn't obvious all along. I loved seeing a frank acknowledgement of his queerness as the book progressed and was eager to learn more about his character and his past. Matthias, Nina, Weylan - I could spend another paragraph or six discussing them all. The culture clash, the love-hate-love relationship, a character with dyslexia, multiple falls from grace. Leigh Bardugo leaves no stone unturned, shies away from no story, and yet the book doesn't feel overwhelming. Every plot point is relevant and engaging, every character a deep well of intricacies that you want to pick at an unravel. And then there's the plot, intriguing, exciting, full of twists and turns and plan after plan - what more could you want from a heist? Six unlikely, dangerous outcasts come together to break into the Ice Court, an unbreachable stronghold. If you like competency porn, this is a book for you. Like Leverage, but more gritty and full of fantastical elements, you rarely doubt the characters and their skills, only if they'll be able to beat the odds. I wanted to learn more about the world; I loved seeing how all the different cultures and elements came together to create a puzzle. It's a puzzle you can't imagine solving at first, full of moments where everything seems helpless. You want to give up, but you don't because none of the characters are willing to give up and there's always another branch to explore. By the end of the story, you are stubborn as Kaz and the rest of the Crows, determined to win no matter the cost. The Grishaverse is such a brilliant universe and Six of Crows is a fantastic story, one that I couldn't put down. I read it in hours both times and I'm sure I'll end up doing it again.

(also posted on Goodreads)

[opinionatedeve]

Squid Game

Yes. I will be sharing my thoughts on this infamous Netflix series because why not? I did not sacrifice my sleeping hour and potentially missing assignments deadline just for me to not share it with you guys. But seriously, binge-watching a series with academic pressure hits differently. As I am sure this series won’t need an introduction, I’ll just provide the background a little bit. Squid Game is a 9 episode Korean series that went viral on social media literally a few days after the release.

I do understand the hype to be honest, it really does deserve all the hype. The contributing factor of it is the fact that the actress is a super-hot model that made her first debut in acting; Jung HoYeon. A fun fact, she is a best friend of Jennie from the global Kpop girl group BLACKPINK. She’s been the “It Girl” of South Korea since forever anyway and now she is getting the global recognition which is well-deserved by the way!

As much as I try to keep my reviews with no spoilers, sometimes I can’t help myself. I babbled way  too much. It's like I write every thought that runs through my mind – yes, I guess my writing skills are that way. That explains the constant topic derailments since I mostly talked about myself instead of the reviews.

Also, can we talk about how at this point it’s technically impossible to not watch any spoiler about this series? I’ve probably learned about the series more on Tiktok and Twitter than by actually watching it. Lucky for me though, I watched the series on the release date so if anything I could be one of those spoilers but I didn’t.

It is a thriller series and I think the scariest part of this series is on how realistic it is. I just know there are people that will willingly go if they had the opportunity to, considering how today’s world is run by capitalism. The first episode shook me because I obviously didn’t read the description of the series before I started watching it because when I tell you the way I gasped when the first killing was executed..

Essentially, the series is about a bunch of debtors or people that are struggling financially are contacted to join a series of games with a huge amount of money on the line for the winner. This series definitely shows you the human nature for survival and what money does to people when they are desperate.

The oxymoron of the series is the fact that they are playing children's games but it has deadly consequences, literally. People are dying from playing childhood games. What a way to ruin South Korean childhood memories. The seemingly innocent simple games are now being tied to violent deaths and that unexpected juxtaposition made me curious to watch the series until the end.

The lead character, Seong Gi-hun is an unemployed gambling addict who is portrayed as a kind and compassionate character to other players he is playing with. But I disagree. Because he could’ve been a good father to his young daughter but he chose to play deadly games, voluntarily?! He already lost custody of his daughter because of his incompetence and he can’t even be there for her daughter? I understood the tragic backstory of him being chased by loan sharks but that does not excuse risking his life to play games, if he died his daughter will be fatherless forever. Not that he was ever there for his daughter but his little daughter still sees him from time to time in the series.

Another character that caught my attention is Ali. Ali is a Pakistani underpaid laborer that is working in construction, and he came to South Korea with his wife and daughter to provide his family a better life. Long story short, he ended up dead playing in one of the games because he was tricked by another player that he trusted and respected. He even called his killer “Hyung” which means Brother. I lost my marbles when he died. If you watched the series, you will get my reference. But what messed me up is the fact that when Ali left his family to play the games, he didn’t inform his wife and daughter. Now that he ended up dead, his family will assume he abandoned them when he is literally the sweetest character ever and that made me so mad, and sad.

It is a well-paced and mesmerizing series in each episode with its emotional sentiments, dramatic and even comedic at a few scenes. The storyline ending is hinting towards Season 2 as there are unanswered plot points shown for the audience to look forward to. This series will keep you invested and on edge throughout all the episodes that you just couldn’t wait to watch all the episodes just to find out the ending is a cliffhanger.

In case you didn’t get it yet this series is not family or children friendly because the scenes are violent and gore. I even flinched at some points watching the series and that’s coming from me, an avid viewer of Final Destination and SAW. If you’re into suspense or thriller shows and you have been looking for a sign to watch Squid Game or not; this is your sign to watch it.

[caranfindel]

Recap/review 15.17: “Unity”

THEN: Chuck is destroying all his worlds. Dean tricked Amara into going along with their plan. Empty!Meg is on Billie's side because she just wants to go back to sleep. (Don't we all, dear.) Billie wants Dean to be ready. Dean finally told Sam the truth and Sam was MAD.

NOW: Amara is enjoying a hot pool and a glass of wine in Reykjavik, Iceland. (She's pretending to read but there's no way she can see that book. Although I guess she could have super vision. Why not? And I'm sure the book itself is significant and maybe I'll look that up later but let's face it, I probably won't.) Her glorious view of the Milky Way is punctuated by what seems to be a falling star. But there are more and more and more and she knows what it really is. "Welcome home, brother."

Title card!

Bunker. Sam is on the phone with Cas, who just found out a possible lead in the "Basilica of Guadalupe" was useless. I wonder if he means the Basilica of Our Lady of Guadalupe in Mexico? A 35-hour drive from Lebanon? "That's all right," Sam says. "We'll find a way." {Sidebar: Eternal optimism or simple bullheaded refusal to accept the inevitable truth? Discuss.} Dean enters and asks if that was Cas, but Sam doesn't answer.

So, this is how it's gonna be? You're gonna give me the silent treatment?

I'm not sure what you want me to say.

That you get it. Like I said, killing Amara, Jack, dying, that's the only way.

Sam huffs and imitates Dean: "The only way. Our one shot. Our last chance. You ever get tired of saying stuff like that?" The guys are interrupted by a noise, and I'm just going to stop here for a minute, because I need to talk about Sam's anger. Sam's delicious anger. Apparently some people thought it was inappropriate for Sam to be so mad at Dean last week. At least that's what I read on the Tumblr. I'm sure no one reading this post feels that way. I mean, anyone who found Sam's anger inappropriate would have stopped reading my crap a long time ago, right? I just don't get it. This isn't an "I can see both sides" situation. Dean withheld information from Sam - lied to Sam - and I know they've both lied to each other before, but this was something catastrophic involving someone he loves. And when confronted, Dean doubled down. He didn't say "sorry, I just couldn't bear to tell you" or "I was hoping Cas would find some other way" or "I was trying to think of a way to break it to you easy." He blamed Sam. He told Sam he wasn't qualified to have that information because he would have done something about it. And after Dean spent the entire episode whining about having no control over his life, being a hamster in a wheel, he sentenced Sam to the same fate - he told him that he didn't have the right to know about Jack because he refused to just accept that this is their destiny.

I mean, I'm not bitter or anything.

Silver lining: Dean treating Sam so horribly at least means I got some tasty, tasty Angry Sam. (Mandatory disclaimer: I love Dean. I love that he is heroic and self-sacrificing but also deeply, deeply flawed.) Moving on.

Wait. I also love that Sam's justification for the silent treatment isn't I'm punishing you or even I'm mad at you, but is literally there is nothing I can say to you. Nothing I say will mean anything to you. All right, now we're moving on. Searching for the source of the noise, the guys find - Amara! Drinking their beer! Wearing pink again, but this time it's sparkly! "We should talk," she says.

Or, you know, we could just look. Looking is good. We have a little time jump in order to gather Jack. Amara tells the boys that her brother is back, and Jack knows this means it's time. She asks how they're going to cage Chuck, and Dean lies that Jack will be able to do it. Amara hopes she and Jack can get to know each other afterward, and Jack lies that they will. He just has to complete one final ritual. Sam doesn't lie to anybody; he just stands there looking unhappy. Amara asks what she can do to help, and they cut away from any discussion of what she's going to do, but then we get this. When the time comes, we can count on you, right? Like I told you when we first met, you and I will always help each other. Awkward! The way Amara is looking at Dean, I'm pretty sure she knows he's lying, and is just waiting for him to break down. (Spoiler alert: why do I even try?) But Dean and his lying, lying eyes do not break down.

But those eyes don't exactly hide any secrets either, do they? Meanwhile, Jack is concerned that Sam is angry at him. Or disappointed. Sam manages to express both support for Jack doing the thing and a strong desire for Jack to not do the thing. "Sacrificing your life for a cause takes a lot of courage," he says."I still think it's wrong, though." OH SAM. YOU WOULD KNOW. AND YOU WOULD DO IT ANYWAY. Apparently Jack's final ritual is taking place in Santa Fe. Dean's ready to go, and says they can be there by morning. (Oh, I hope she tells us if that's possible, they said sarcastically.) Hey, anyone who doesn't want a deep dive into the logistics of Winchester travel can write their own damn recap skip this part. I think the guys actually went to Santa Fe last season? Ouroboros? Anyway, it's 10.5 hours away. 11 hours if you avoid highways, which we know Dean likes to do, although that route would take you on some mountain roads that would probably be a little much for the Impala. So yeah, depending on what time it is now, "by morning" is doable. I know you're relieved. I think the bigger question is when will Cas get back from Mexico City? (Yes, I'm sure he drove - he was standing by his blue truck. Yes, I know no one else cares.) Dean is surprised to find that Sam's not going. He accuses Sam of "taking a knee," but Sam says that's not what he's doing. He's still looking for another way. Sam, you and me, we have to do this; it's in the book. Oh, Chuck's death book, right? Come on, man! Blindly following orders, sending Amara to her death; does any of this feel right to you? It doesn't matter how we feel! You know what? Stay. Stay. But somebody's got to be the grownup here. Yeah, well, someone has to keep fighting for Jack. He knows what he signed up for! Last I checked, we don't give up on family. Jack's not family! I know how you feel about the kid, okay? I feel for him too. I do. But he's not like you. He's not like Cas. He's just not. I have to confess, I maaaayyyybeee haven't been keeping up with the A plot as much as I should have, because I wasn't aware they were actually operating from a book. (Or I was and I forgot. Stranger things have happened.) I thought this was just Billie's plan. But if it's a book, that means it was fated to happen, right? Um, like the Ma'lak box? And why isn't Sam pointing that out? Why isn't Sam saying "we've already changed one of Billie's unchangeable endings, what makes you think we can't change this one?" But, you know. That's not important. What is important are two things: 1, the way Sam reacts when Dean says "Jack's not family," and B, the fact that Jack has entered the room at some point and heard some of that. Again, awkward! How many times has Jack come up behind someone and overheard something like that? Why don't they put a bell on that poor kid? Jack says he's ready, Sam gives him a sad, broken little smile and Jack and Dean hit the road. Boy, that's gonna be an uncomfortable 11 hours.

Whatever you think about this scene, you have to admit Jared is acting the hell out of it. Bunker. Cas is back, so I guess it's been 35 hours since that phone call. "Stayed behind to find another way, huh? I would have done the same." They research together. Wooded park. Amara. Chuck shows up. A title card weirdly informs us this is Amara. Yeah, we know that. I don't really care that much about their convo. All you need to know is he wants to do a "hard reset" - another Big Bang? - and can't do it without her. But she cares about this world now and wants to protect it. He thinks humans are lame and boring, and she says "what about your first children?" and zaps him into Heaven. He's welcomed by a small, adoring group of angels, but Crystal (an angel named Crystal?) annoys him so much that he snaps them all away. Amara offers him balance, darkness and light, here on this Earth, but he's not interested. So she zaps him into the bunker, which she has made into a trap for him. Impala. Dean, says the title card, unnecessarily. (Now that I've figured out what they're doing, I'd say the odds are 50:50 that Sam will have a title card.) Dean starts to talk about what Jack heard - not necessarily to apologize, but Jack says he understands that he's not like Sam or Cas. Okay then. Morning. They show up at a jewelry store and are greeted enthusiastically by the man and woman inside. "I'm Adam," the man says. "You know. God's primo. First dude off the assembly line." The woman with him is not Eve, but a hippie angel named Seraphina. I guess that means she's a seraph? Get it? (Sorry, I have to amuse myself sometimes.) She proclaims Jack's aura is "like Skittles," and of course it is. What else would it be like, other than something sweet and rainbow-colored? {Sidebar: Or should it be like nougat? Discuss.} Adam and Seraphina are very into Jack and also very much into each other. They separate long enough for Adam to take Jack for a "pop quiz." Seraphina says she knows Jack will pass because she saw it in a dream, which annoys me because angels don't sleep, but it turns out she means a mushroom-induced hallucination. She tells Dean that so many things had to happen for Jack to end up here, it was obviously "meant to be." Which doesn't sit well with Dean. Meanwhile, Adam explains to Jack that because of what God did to him and his sons, he's been wanting to kill him for a very long time. Billie is working with him, and kept him alive so he could finish the job. They've just been waiting for Jack. Adam shows him a tray of crystals and tells him to pick the one that was touched by God. Jack points to one, and Adam is disappointed. That's your choice? Yes. And... the others. All of them. They're just rocks, but their existence makes them divine, because God is in everything. And that's the right answer! Jack and Adam return, triumphant, and Seraphina celebrates by plunging a knife into Adam's chest and prying out a rib. Ew. "Everything can contain the spark of the divine, but this puppy? Is packing enough punch to create life. Or in this case, destroy God." With the power of the rib, Jack will turn into a "metaphysical black hole for divine energy" that nothing can escape. Not Amara, not God. But once is starts, it can't be stopped, so Jack shouldn't use it until "game time."

I'm pleased that Adam is a Middle Eastern guy. Back in the Impala, some hours later, Dean pulls over right before they get home. He apologizes to Jack for hearing what he heard. Not for saying it, but for Jack hearing it. He tells Jack that he hasn't been free his entire life. "But now, now me and Sam, we got a shot at living a life. Without all this crap on our backs. And that's because of you. So, I want to say, I need to say, thank you, Jack." Well, that's a nice emotional moment, but isn't Jack doing this to save the world? Not just to get Dean off the hamster wheel? Dean's phone buzzes. It's time. Jack takes the rib out of its baggie and absorbs it into his hand and oh, Jack, I don't think I'd have done that just yet. Bunker. Is this Sam's section? Yes, it is! \o/ Sam hurls a book to the floor in frustration and is comforted by Cas. Guys, Sam and Cas tend to do some crazy fucked-up shit when they're left together unsupervised, and I am here for it. Sam wishes he could talk to Billie about her plan, and Cas immediately assumes he's going to kill himself and puts his foot down. But Sam suddenly remembers what Sergei said about the key to Death's library. "Oh, is that why I invited Sergei here to the secret bunker," Cas says, "because now that makes sense." They start digging through old wooden chests and I'm fairly sure these are boxes full of cursed objects, although all they find are a large novelty chess piece, a gold leaf cross from Hobby Lobby, and the Holy Grail.

Tell me you didn't think the same thing. But Cas eventually does find the box with the key. The box has an inscription in Latin, which Sam reads out loud. By the way, Sam Latinating is always hot, even though he looks like he doesn't understand what he's saying. As the guys watch in amazement, a portal and keyhole appear in the wall. Cas wants to go with, but Sam asks him to stay and buy him some time if Dean comes back before he gets out, even if that sounds crazy. "Sam, for what it's worth, I don't think you're crazy," Cas says. "I think your internal compass is functioning perfectly." And Sam's all, aw, that's the nicest thing anyone's said to me in a long time.

"Donde está la biblioteca?” He puts the key in the keyhole and opens the door into the W section of Billie's library. I want him to start pulling books off the shelves and reading versions of his death, but he's distracted by a dead reaper on the floor. And more dead reapers. And the sound of one begging for her life and then noisily dying. He finally sees Empty!Meg (\o/) sitting at the circulation desk, as another reaper pleads for his life. "Please," he cries, "she won't come!" He prays unsuccessfully for Billie to come, and gets his neck snapped for his trouble. Sam immediately tries to nope the hell out of there, but Empty!Meg snaps her fingers and he appears in front of her. Sam Winchester? Meg? Sorry, she's still dead. Just borrowing the queen's pretty face cause really? I'm empty. {Sidebar: Why would Meg's meatsuit go to the Empty with her? Discuss.} Empty!Meg is trying to get Billie's attention, and she drops a bombshell on Sam. Billie intends to become the new God. "Classic narcissist, right? So tingly for the rules, the good old days. Everyone back to where they belong. Realities, dimensions, graves. What should be dead dies, angels off Earth, demons back to Hell, and I go back to sleep!" Oh, wait. Graves? So anyone who was dead at some point, and was brought back to life, would go back to the grave? She tells Sam that he's in God's book - the ornate book in front of her that only Billie can read. "She always talked about how you should be so dead, except she needs you." Empty!Meg decides that hurting Sam might get Billie's attention, and well, y'all know I'm not opposed to that. (If you're new here, hi, my name is caranfindel and I have a problem.) She brings Sam to his knees, but he finally manages to say "Billie sent me." Oh, Sam. He claims Billie sent him to get the book, because she's trapped on Earth. Empty!Meg can't go to Earth unless she's summoned (hmmm, wonder if that will come up later), and Sam says he has a message for her, from Billie. "Billie will honor her promise. God, Amara, they die. And you, you can go back to sleep." Empty!Meg decides to believe Sam, even though he didn't even know who she was or why she was there when he got there, or that Billie had even made any promises, but I'd have a hard time saying no to that face too.

I'll believe your lies. When Sam comes back through the door into the bunker, Cas greets him with "finally" as if he's been gone a long time, so time must flow differently in Billie's library. Cas tells him Chuck and Amara are here, and it's time. "We can't let that happen," says Sam. "We have to stop it." In the trap, Chuck narrates what's happening elsewhere in the bunker. "You hear that? Dean. Brought to the edge of doubt. His sense of duty, his rage, winning out in the end." As Dean drags Jack through the hall, Sam tells him about Billie's plan to take advantage of the power vacuum and become God. Dean doesn't care - he doesn't mind being duped as long as it's not by Chuck. "And poor Sam," says Chuck. "Always gotta know everything. Can't leave well enough alone." Poor Sam stands in front of Dean, trying to stop him. Dean yells that Jack already "lit the fuse" and they can't wait any longer. "This is my ending," Chuck says. "My real ending." And just as I'm wondering if he means his preferred ending, where one brother always kills another, Dean pulls his gun out and points it at Sam's heart. "Move, Sam. Move!" Sam's horrified. Cas and Jack are horrified. I'm horrified. And also, I'm ashamed to say, very entertained. I mean, I don't want the brothers fighting, and yet for Dean to lose the plot so badly that he'd actually shoot Sam in order to get off the hamster wheel? That's some gloriously messed up stuff, friends. Amara is shocked that Chuck orchestrated all of this. "What part of omniscient do you people not understand?" he says, and YES. THIS is something that has long needed to be said. He says that even though he can't read his death book, all he had to do was plant a few visions, mess with a few outcomes, bada bing bada boom! Nobody's killing him! Hallway. Sam pleads with Dean. "I don't want to do this," Dean says, "but this is everything!"

THIS is everything. Trap. Amara tells Chuck they're going to cage him, not kill him. Hallway. Dean does that thing you do with a gun when you want someone to know you're serious. Clicks off the safety, or whatever. Sam makes a have we really come to this? face and yanks Dean's gun hand away. Dean punches him and he drops to the floor. Trap. Chuck tells Amara that TFW is planning to kill both of them. Hallway. Dean drags Jack toward the trap and Sam tackles him. Dean punches him again. Cas just watches all this. What the hell, Cas. Trap. Chuck says the Winchesters are using Jack to destroy them. Amara says that can't be, because Dean can't hurt her. "No, but he can lie to you. He can send you into the meat grinder with a wink and a smile." But isn't that hurting her? Hallway. Dean orders Cas and Jack to go. Sam yells for Jack not to do it. Cas asks why not, because... Cas has suddenly forgotten what side of this argument he's on? "Because if Billie takes over, then everyone goes back to where they belong!" Sam says. "That means everybody from Apocalypse World - Bobby, Charlie - they get sent back to a place that doesn't exist any more. And everyone we saved! Eileen, she just dies, again! And that's just the beginning!" Trap. Amara is devastated. Hallway. Dean yells that they don't have a choice, and Sam says "we always have a choice!" Trap. Chuck tells Amara "the only ones who ever really get us is us." Hallway. Dean says there's nothing they can do but get out of the way, and he doesn't care if Billie becomes God. I'd trade it all, I'd trade 'em all, for Chuck! In a heartbeat! What about me? Would you trade me? Okay, is this Sam pointing out that if Billie becomes God, he dies? Because it's awfully subtle, and I think he just needs to come right and say "that's fine, Dean, but when I told you everyone we saved would die again, I meant everyone, and that includes me!" And Dean would probably also want to know that angels will be banished to Heaven, don't you think, Sam? Anyway. I saw this on Tumblr, and I can't get to it now because Tumblr is being a little bitch, but basically: Sam Winchester may have low self-worth, but he absolutely knows what he means to his brother, and he does not hesitate to use it. Trap. Chuck offers Amara the balance she said she wanted. "Us, starting fresh, creating something new, something beautiful, peaceful, together. And we can finally forget about all this pain. No baggage. Only balance." He extends a hand. Amara takes it and dissolves into smoke, which is absorbed by Chuck, who now has one demon-black eye and one angel-blue eye. And a sadistic grin. Hallway. Chuck has to die. He has to! Otherwise he'll keep us tap dancing forever, and I can't live like that, man! I can't live like that; I won't! I know you feel like that right now, okay? I know you do. But you gotta trust me. My entire life, you've protected me. From Dad? From Lucifer? From everything. I didn't always like it, you know, but it's the one thing in the whole world that I could always count on. It's the only thing I've ever known that was true. So please, put the gun away. Just put it away. We'll figure it out, Dean; we'll find another way. You and me. We always do. Gotta admit, I'm torn about this scene. I mean, on the one hand, it's beautifully done, so much emotion and angst and anger and teary-eyed, shaky Sam. Once again, Jared is acting the hell out of it. (And Jensen too, but come on.) And yet, on the other hand... how bad is Sam's Stockholm Syndrome? "You protected me from Dad?" Have we seen any evidence of that? I'm sure Dean was forced to be the referee sometimes, but have we seen any evidence that Dean ever said "no Sam, you're not disowned just because you want to stop hunting and go to college" or "no Dad, I'm not even going to pretend I'll kill Sam," rather than consider it an option until he was actually faced with it? It seems like "protecting Sam from Dad" mostly meant "trying to get Sam to do what Dad wanted, so he'd stay out of trouble." And Lucifer? When Sam told him he was Lucifer's vessel, and the Devil was coming to him in his dreams, Dean basically said "sucks to be you, now pick a hemisphere." Now, I'm aware that Dean has actually protected Sam from many, many things. In good ways and in bad ways. And yet he's also hurt him in some pretty awful ways. I mean, he just now threatened to shoot him for refusing to accept his destiny is to help Dean escape the slavery of his destiny. So for Sam to say "you protect me" is one thing. Dean absolutely does that. But to say it's the only thing that's true, and to specifically mention John and Lucifer, well. Hmmm.

Let's just concentrate on the pretty. Anyway. Dean puts the gun away, Sam sighs a tearful shaky sigh of relief, and then the door to Amara's trapped room explodes. Chuck walks out dramatically - not nearly as hot as Demon!Demon dramatically walking through his own destroyed door - and yells at them. "Are you kidding me? After everything, after all that, you did it again!" He tells them he absorbed Amara, mocks Castiel (which is kind of funny), and says they're all stupid, stubborn, and broken, and he's done with them. "You know what you do with broken toys? You throw them out. So, kill each other, don't kill each other, I don't care." Then he tells them to have fun watching Jack die, and zaps on out of there. Jack collapses, and bad things are clearly happening to him. Well, it's hard to get worked up over Jack dying again (what would this be, the third time?). After all, as Dean said, he's not Sam. I'm more interested in finding out if Dean understood he was sentencing Sam to death when he said he didn't care if Billie became God. {Sidebar: Would Dean die too? Or would everything that happened because Sam was brought back be erased? Discuss. And maybe fic.} And now Amara is gone. But, conveniently, destroying Chuck will also destroy her, so. Balance! Unity! Hugs and puppies all around! Oh, friends. The end is near, and I don't feel good about it. I'm anxious about a lot of things happening next week, and the third-to-last episode of Supernatural is one of them. How do you feel? 

Please help me stay unspoiled, including episode titles and casting info, thanks!

[tearsofthemis]

[Date] 左然 Zuo Ran: 「醉意入怀 Drunken Bottled Truths」

Preview:

“Why... I told you, to come find me when you run into trouble. Why did you have to... with him... Do you always trust others this easily!?”

Keep reading for the full date!

▌Location- Themis Law Firm, Break Room

Beep beep beep-- it was four-thirty in the afternoon, and my alarm went off on my phone. I closed the notification, saved the document I was working on, and closed my laptop. I brought my makeup bag from my desk into the break room and started my routine. There’s a business reception tonight, organized by the famous watchmaker brand in Stellis City, “LingXi Watches”. Zuo Ran had been responsible for one of their lawsuits and had been invited to attend. In turn, Zuo Ran extended the invitation to me as his plus one.)

MC: (Maybe I should spend more time practicing how to put on makeup… My skills are seriously lacking… Oh well, I should be fine with a little foundation. I don’t think I should attempt anything more advanced than that.)

Just as I was rummaging through my bag of makeup products, the break room door opened. ChengCheng peeked in to the breakroom and quickly rushed over to me.

ChengCheng: “Psst, is it true that you’ll be attending LingXi Watches’s reception with Lawyer Zuo tonight?”

MC: “Yeah, why, what’s wrong?”

Suddenly, ChengCheng clasped my hands in hers and looked at me with sparkling eyes.

ChengCheng: “I beg you… I only have this one wish in my life! If it’s not too much trouble, I beg you… you gotta help me!”

MC: “What is it?”

ChengCheng: “My favorite star is attending LingXi Watches’s party as their spokesperson. If you get a chance to meet him, can you help me get his autograph…”

ChengCheng continued to explain; I couldn’t get a word in.

ChengCheng: “I’m not asking for you to hound him or anything like that! If… the opportunity should present itself, won’t you try and ask him for me…”

MC: “Alright, I’ll try. No guarantees though-”

ChengCheng wrapped me in a tight bear hug before I could finish my sentence.

ChengCheng: “Of course, of course! I owe you my life in thanks! MC, you’re like an angel sent down from above!”

▌Location- Zuo Ran’s Office

At the same time…

Zhai Xing: “Are you really planning on taking MC to tonight’s banquet?”

Zuo Ran: “That’s right, why?”

Zhai Xing: “The reception isn’t exclusive to businesspeople; there’s going to be celebrities attending as well. I remember… Gao ShengHan, LingXi Watches’s spokesperson, will be in attendance.”

Zuo Ran: “You pay attention to celebrity news?”

Zhai Xing: “Of course not, I only know him because he recently starred in a popular new drama about love in the workplace. In the end, all the ladies in our firm were raving about him, so I remembered his name. I heard that Gao ShengHan is deemed ‘the senior we’d kill to work with’.”

Zhai Xing glanced at Zuo Ran and gave him a pointed look.

Zhai Xing: “Aren’t you scared that she’ll…?”

Zuo Ran: “I don’t think she’s the type of person to be attracted to TV personalities. Besides, dramas like that aren’t based on reality. A relationship is built upon a foundation of mutual understanding and trust.”

Zhai Xing: “What you just described is defined as a slow-burn love. Now, let’s not forget that ‘love at first sight’ still exists. Hold on - what did you just say? ‘Dramas like that-’? What do you even know about TV tropes? You’ve watched his show?”

Zuo Ran awkwardly coughed, got up, and fixed his tie.

Zuo Ran: “There’s not much time left, I’ll head out first.”

~~~

▌Location- Parking Lot

Zuo Ran drove us to the hotel venue, and we arrived close to the banquet start time. This was my first time accompanying Zuo Ran as his plus one. In the past, I had only attended strictly as his assistant. I couldn’t help but feel nervous. I closed my eyes and took a couple deep breaths. Just then, Zuo Ran spoke up beside me.

Zuo Ran: “Ah, there’s something I have to remind you of.”

MC: “What is it?”

Zuo Ran: “There’s going to be all kinds of people at the reception. If anyone tries to force you to accept drinks, you need not go along with them. Immediately come find me if it happens.”

MC: “B-but the guests tonight all have some kind of social standing. If I refuse their invites, it won't look good for them…”

I hesitated. Even if I didn’t have experience attending parties like this, it would sound rude if I refused.

MC: “I’m not going as my own entity, my actions may directly impact Themis.”

Not to mention, I’ll be representing Zuo Ran as well… I can’t afford to do anything that might upset the guests; I’ll end up only causing trouble for Zuo Ran.

MC: “Also, what if the other party is a client of Themis… it’ll be a good opportunity to get our firm’s name out there.”

Zuo Ran: “I don’t need to drink to pull clients. Themis isn’t asking that of you, either.”

Zuo Ran smiled gently when he noticed that I was nervous.

Zuo Ran: “All you have to do is be your everyday self. You’re the partner I’ve chosen, let your professionalism sway others for you. Believe in yourself, and trust me.”

He spoke directly and calmly, his words carrying a gentle strength.

MC: “... I understand.”

--- PART 2 ---

▌Location- Banquet Venue

Even with Zuo Ran’s reassuring presence, I felt nervous walking into the venue. I checked out the beautiful hotel decor, and my sights settled on someone who stood out in the crowd.

MC: (Is… Isn’t that Gao ShengHan?)

ChengCheng’s wish popped into mind, I hurriedly pulled out the picture she had handed me earlier so that I could confirm it was really Gao ShengHan.

MC: “It really is Gao ShengHan!”

I accidentally spoke my mind, and Zuo Ran turned around at the sound of my voice.

Zuo Ran: “What is it? Someone you recognize?”

MC: “A-ah, not quite, I just saw someone famous, and I can’t help but feel starstruck.”

Zuo Ran looked over my shoulder, and saw Gao ShengHan. He raised a brow at me.

Zuo Ran: “...”

MC: “Seeing him up close in person, he’s actually quite…”

I turned around as I spoke, and met Zuo Ran’s sharp gaze. He was frowning, searching my face with an expression so strange that I couldn’t even begin to describe it.

Zuo Ran: “You… care about him?”

MC: “I guess so, his recent TV drama is quite popular.”

Zuo Ran quieted, and he glanced at the photo in my hand.

MC: (C-crap… does Lawyer Zuo think I accompanied him just so I can meet celebrities? That’s so unprofessional!)

I quickly shoved the picture of Gao ShengHan back into my clutch, and awkwardly reassured him.

MC: “T-that... Lawyer Zuo! I promise this will not hinder my work! Th-the picture… it’s…”

Zuo Ran: “...”

One of LingXi Watches’s executives approached us and began to discuss the aftermath of their court victory with Zuo Ran, thus I couldn’t finish explaining myself. The case was one that Zuo Ran had worked on all by himself before I had become his work partner. My presence beside Zuo Ran might hinder his discussion, so I quietly left his side.

On the other side of the banquet hall, Gao ShengHan was entertaining a small group of people. ChengCheng’s wish popped up in my mind again, but…

MC: “The people he’s with right now… must be a bunch of hotshots… How can a small-time lawyer such as myself approach the nation’s husband…”

As I stood aside brainstorming ways that I could approach Gao ShengHan, he started walking towards me.

Gao ShengHan: “Hi, I was wondering if you were Lawyer MC?”

MC: “Ah! Yes, I am, nice to meet you. You’ve… heard of me?”

Gao ShengHan: “Of course. You were the one who defended PAX Group's Mr. Lu Jinghe from accusation, right? I followed the news coverage and even watched videos of the trial; it was very exciting.”

MC: “You flatter me. I would’ve never thought that an A-list celebrity such as yourself would pay attention to the subject of law.”

Gao ShengHan: “Ah, actually, I’ve only recently started paying attention.”

MC: “Oh?”

Gao ShengHan smiled and used the topic of the lawsuit to strike up conversation with me. It turned out that he had been cast for an upcoming law drama and was brushing up on a lawyer’s mannerisms, even going as far as to shadow lawyers when they were on the clock. He told me he had reviewed many videos of trials, but there were still things he preferred to talk face to face about with professional lawyers.

Gao ShengHan: “The office drama that just aired was made popular all thanks to the director’s hard work on writing such a phenomenal script. The truth is… my acting is still lacking… I didn’t come from an acting background, so there’s still a lot I have to learn. So I’m hoping that it’ll help if I prepare for the role in advance.”

He spoke with an absolutely charming and boyish determination, but stood firm with a man’s conviction. He was set on chasing his dream of becoming a good actor; it was hard not to like him.

MC: (No wonder ChengCheng likes him so much…)

Gao ShengHan: “Lawyer MC, I was wondering if you would share with me some tips and tricks when it comes to speaking in court?”

I was still working on getting ChengCheng her autograph, and I hastily accepted his request.

MC: “Of course I can! Although it’s been said that facts can triumph over eloquence, in the eyes of the law, it is often that facts will benefit from eloquence. Polishing your debate skills and litigation strategies can get you twice as far, with half the effort.”

Gao ShengHan: “I see, then what about cases with iron-clad evidence, or cases with little to no evidence at all?”

MC: “Then we’ve got to cross-examine whatever they’ve got! A piece of evidence’s authenticity, legitimacy, relevance, and size of the evidence must always be considered and contested.”

That’s how Zuo Ran once dismantled a case with seemingly solid defense.

~~~Flashback~~~

Defendant Xiao Ke was charged with homicide and imprisoned twenty years ago. He escaped after serving his sentence for ten years, and was arrested again after returning home to visit his sickly mother.

Prosecutor: “The prosecutor believes that defendant Xiao Ke’s behavior meets the severity of prison escape. The facts of the crime are clear, and the evidence against him is sufficient.”

Zuo Ran: “On the surface, the defendant’s prison escape is indeed in line with escape crimes. However, I would like to ask the prosecutor, what is the legal benefit infringed by the escape crime?”

Prosecutor: “The interests violated by the escape crime are punishable under the jurisdiction of the normal order of justice.”

Zuo Ran: “Correct, but the defendant’s past prison escape does not violate the normal order of justice, and is rather an incorrect order. The guilty verdict on the count of first-degree homicide twenty years ago was fundamentally a false verdict!”

Prosecutor: “Defendant, I must remind you that the chain of evidence was complete. Both evidence and witness testimony-”

Zuo Ran: “The issue lies within the witness testimony! The time of the incident was 10PM on the eighteenth of February. The witness claimed he saw the defendant Xiao Ke push the victim off the east side of the bridge, resulting in the victim’s death. The witness emphasized that because the skies were clear and the moonlight was bright, he was able to watch the incident’s proceedings very clearly. However, the eighteenth of February was five days after the new moon, thus sufficient light could not have been provided. Secondly, the moon would have risen from the west, making the moonlight shine from west to east. If the suspect had pushed the victim off the east side of the bridge, his face could not have been seen solely by moonlight. Allow me to ask, how could the witness under those conditions see the defendant’s face at the bridgehead twenty meters away?”

One by one, Zuo Ran cross-examined the evidence the prosecutor had provided, tearing into each discrepancy.

~~~Flashback ends~~~

Gao ShengHan: “Th-that’s incredible! Just like that, he managed to overturn the court ruling! But… even if it were a false verdict, it must have been difficult to win a retrial. Although I’m not well versed in law, people have always been unwilling to admit their own mistakes…”

MC: “Well, that…”

Zuo Ran’s statement of defense back then, as a lawyer myself, and as his partner, I shared the glory and triumph of his success.

~~~Flashback~~

Zuo Ran: “The evidence presented by the prosecution for the incident cannot form a complete system of proof. According to the principle of a false verdict, the defendant Xiao Ke’s initial ruling cannot be established, and he was falsely sentenced. Since he was falsely imprisoned to begin with, where is the escape crime? Therefore, the defendant’s prison break, cannot even be labelled as such.”

The jury broke out in a frenzy of discussion after Zuo Ran’s defense. He looked squarely at the jury and spoke again, the sound of his voice quelling the murmurs.

Zuo Ran: “The purpose of upholding the law is not just limited to punishing criminals, but also to protect the rights of those who are innocent. Criminal law must be obliged to not only protect our country from offenders, but also to protect the wrongly accused as well as the prosecutors who put them there. If there does not exist such procedural justice, the upholding of justice itself will be as pointless as water without a source. Then, the dignity of the law will fall apart. The defendant hereby appeals to the court, to uphold the spirit of seeking nothing but the truth, and asks for a reevaluation of the evidence. We ask on the basis of the criminal justice system as the criterion, the defendant be pronounced innocent in accordance with the law.”

~~~Flashback ends~~~

The calm and orderly manner in which Zuo Ran delivers criticism, that is the masterful way in which Zuo Ran works his magic in court. And I think it’s an art, the best speech arts in the world.

Gao ShengHan: “I see! No wonder I felt a sense of Deja Vu when I was watching the trial… After hearing about Lawyer Zuo’s speech-- I can see that you two share similar debate styles!”

MC: “Huh?”

I’ll admit that I’ve picked apart Zuo Ran’s technique and mannerisms in court, trying my best to mimic him when I have spare time, but…

MC: “I’m far from reaching his level.”

Gao ShengHan: “No, I don’t think so. You’re close, very close to his skill level. Especially with the emotional control of the room, the way you conceal your intention behind hidden meanings so that your opponent says what you want them to…”

Gao ShengHan listed notes that he had taken on my style after watching my trial. He analyzed the similarities between our presence in court through the perspective of an actor.

MC: (So to other people, this is what they see?)

I subconsciously scanned the sea of bodies for Zuo Ran’s familiar frame. He was still talking to the LingXi executive, his expression calm and indifferent. Suddenly, he must have felt someone watching as he returned my gaze and looked at me.

MC: “!!!”

I hurriedly turned away. Gao ShengHan didn't notice that I was distracted as he continued rambling.

Gao ShengHan: “Ah, I just remembered, you’re Lawyer Zuo’s partner, right? I’ve heard other people mention that you two are a natural pair…”

~~~

On the other side of the banquet hall, Zuo Ran was still responding to the executive’s incessant questions, but his attention gradually began to slip away to watch a certain corner of the room. There, Gao ShengHan and the girl were talking amiably; they seemed to have hit it off. The girl turned to look at him, then quickly looked away. Just then, a vivid smile blossomed on the girl’s face. Her cheeks were pink, and her eyes were sparkling, almost as if she had confided in the other man a secret that she had held deep in her heart.

Zuo Ran: “...”

Zuo Ran’s gaze narrowed, and he subconsciously itched the palm of his hand.

--- PART 3 ---

▌Location- Banquet hall

After Gao ShengHan and I finished our discussion about debate techniques, he thanked me profusely.

MC: “Ah, it was nothing. Then, Mr. Gao, can I ask you for a favor? It’s like this, er, I have a really good friend…”

I recounted to Gao ShengHan what ChengCheng had said to me in the breakroom, and he happily agreed to sign the photo.

MC: “Thank you so much!”

Gao ShengHan: “You’re very welcome! I should be the one thank you, honestly. Chatting with you has helped me a lot. And I would’ve never guessed that your co-worker has been supporting me ever since I debuted. Ah, aside from the autograph, let me film a shout out too! Would you help me take the video?”

MC: “Of course!”

MC: (Hehe… ChengCheng is going to flip when she sees this!)

I can just picture ChengCheng frothing at the mouth after I bring her the autograph, and a personal video to boot as I quickly pulled out my phone. Gao ShengHan waved enthusiastically at my camera and thanked her for her support and encouragement. After I ended the recording, he suddenly remembered something.

Gao ShengHan: “Actually, Lawyer MC, I’m looking into starting my own studio. If it’s alright, would you help me with the studio’s legal aspect?”

Who knew I’d be the one to find new clients here!

MC: “Thank you for putting your trust with us, I’ll inform Lawyer Zuo in a bit.”

Gao ShengHan: “Then I’ll have to trouble you for that. To commemorate our upcoming collaboration, and to express my thanks for your help earlier, let’s have a toast.”

Gao ShengHan flagged down the server, who brought two flutes of champagne over.

MC: “Then…”

~~~Flashback~~~

Zuo Ran: “Ah, there’s something I have to remind you of.”

Zuo Ran: “There’s going to be all kinds of people at the reception. If anyone tries to force you to accept drinks, you need not go along with them. Immediately come find me if it happens.”

~~~Flashback ends~~~

I looked at the champagne Gao ShengHan expectantly held out to me, and after I recalled Zuo Ran’s advice from earlier, I hesitated a little.

[Select: Don’t decline]

MC: (It doesn’t seem like he’s forcing me to drink with him… Besides, Gao ShengHan did sign the autograph, and he’s looking to collaborate with Themis. It’ll look really bad if I refuse…)

Gao ShengHan: “Lawyer MC?”

MC: “Ah, thank you. A toast, then…”

I didn’t finish my sentence as a hand reached out to grab my wrist, interrupting us. It was Zuo Ran. He walked over to my side, and wordlessly separated Gao ShengHan and I.

Zuo Ran: “Gao ShengHan?”

MC: “Lawyer Zuo?”

Gao ShengHan: “Ah! You’re the famous Barrister Zuo! It’s an honor to meet you in the flesh!”

Gao ShengHan held out his hand for a handshake. Zuo Ran glanced at Gao ShengHan, raised his hand, and shook it very formally.

Zuo Ran: “Ah, pardon my intrusion, Mr. Gao. My partner here doesn’t take well to alcohol, I’ll take the drink in her stead.”

I stood frozen in shock as Zuo Ran plucked my champagne flute out of my hand, touched it against Gao ShengHan’s, and downed the drink. Our chat was cut shortly after Zuo Ran’s interruption. Zuo Ran stayed glued to my side for the rest of the night after that. Perhaps it was due to his naturally imposing aura, but no one else dared to propose a toast to us, and instead, opted to respectfully stick to business talk.

~~~

▌Location- The backseat of a taxi

The rest of the night passed in a blink of an eye. Since Zuo Ran had drunk, I hailed us a taxi. After we clamored into the back, all Zuo Ran said to me was, “We’ll drop you off first,” before falling completely silent. He leaned into the seat as a set of ocean-blue eyes looked out of the cab’s window at the passing city lights, seemingly lost in thought. The neon lights flickered over his face, and all I could see was his somber face light up in shades of blue, pink, green, and yellow. I don’t know why, but Zuo Ran seemed to be quite low-spirited.

MC: (Has he been working too hard? Or maybe the LingXi executives asked difficult questions? If I tell Lawyer Zuo about collaborating with Gao ShengHan’s studio, will it help cheer him up? It definitely will! Afterall, this is such a well known client!)

MC: “Lawyer Zuo, I was talking with Gao ShengHan earlier. He’s planning on building his own studio label. He has a lot of trust for Themis Law Firm, and he wants to hire me to act as the studio’s legal consultant.”

Zuo Ran: “... You want to accept his commission?”

MC: “Yes, afterall civil and commercial law is my strength and-”

Just as I was going to suggest bringing ChengCheng along as an assistant, Zuo Ran interrupted me.

Zuo Ran: “...I’m sorry, let’s pick this up tomorrow. I’d like to rest.”

Zuo Ran closed his eyes and leaned against the headrest. After seeing how tired he looked, I instantly clammed up.

MC: “Al- alright.”

MC: (Lawyer Zuo must be absolutely exhausted…)

I quickly grabbed my phone and turned off the ringer. I didn’t want to disrupt Zuo Ran while he rested. Just then, a notification from ChengCheng popped up. She had sent me a pleading eyes emoji. I smiled at her impatience, and sent Gao ShengHan’s video over to her. As expected, ChengCheng was ecstatic, and my phone buzzed nonstop as she spammed me with countless reaction photos and gifs of Gao ShengHan: him acting cute, showing gratefulness, hearts, and kisses.

MC: (She’s so happy, I don’t think she’ll get any sleep tonight! Today, I’ve learned that Gao ShengHan is truly a man with many expressions. I scrolled through the countless stickers and gifs. Infected by ChengCheng’s bubbly texts, I couldn’t help but smile.)

Zuo Ran: “...Ugh!”

A sigh resounded by my ear. Zuo Ran reached out and grabbed my phone. He glared at me as his brows furrowed into deep lines on his forehead.

MC: “Lawyer Zuo?”

Zuo Ran didn’t respond. Instead, he flopped over on top of me, and I rushed to prop him up. Zuo Ran fell asleep with his head resting on my shoulder, drawing in small rasping breaths with the smell of alcohol hanging onto every breath.

MC: “Lawyer Zuo, are you drunk?”

I quickly told the cab driver to turn around after giving him Zuo Ran’s address.

--- PART 4 ---

After we arrived at Zuo Ran’s condo, he still wasn’t awake. It was a relief that I remembered Zuo Ran’s address and apartment number, I said to myself as I helped him up the elevator and into his home.

▌Location- Zuo Ran’s living room

MC: “Hu… Lawyer Zuo, you’re home…”

I guided him over to his couch, and laid him down.

MC: “Lawyer Zuo, how are you feeling? You… you should rest on the sofa for a bit. Once you feel better, take a hot shower before heading to bed, alright?”

It’s quite late, and I’m worried about Zuo Ran. There’s no way I can stay here to take care of him; all I can do is try and leave him with reassuring words.

Zuo Ran: “Hnng…”

It was a struggle getting him back to his suite, and Zuo Ran’s custommade suit was wrinkled from all the tugging and pulling. He stayed motionless in the position that I had left him in on the couch. I’m guessing he’s all out of strength. His skin was still flushed from the alcohol, his hair a mess atop his head, and his pretty brows were drawn tight in discomfort.

MC: “Lawyer Zuo…”

Zuo Ran: “Water…”

Zuo Ran raised his hand and felt around on the ottoman, knocking several things down in the process.

MC: “I’ll go get it for you! Just stay put, I’ll bring you some warm honey water!”

I hesitated on leaving Zuo Ran alone, but I quickly got up and brought him a mug of honey water. I helped him upright, and held the mug for him as he took tiny sips. I watched as his lips glistened with water; they looked really soft.

MC: “...”

My heart pounded in my chest, and I forced myself to look away. Just then, Zuo Ran must have felt hot, for he started pulling at his tie. But no matter how hard he tugged, the tie wouldn’t give way. He scrunched his brows in frustration.

MC: “Is the tie uncomfortable, Lawyer Zuo?”

He grunted and resumed tugging on his tie.

Zuo Ran: “Take… it off…”

I obeyed, helping Zuo Ran take off his suit jacket, and then attempted to loosen his tie. One minute later…

MC: (H-how do you even take off a tie…)

I struggled with the fabric. I didn’t want to use too much force and risk accidentally choking Zuo Ran. His flushed skin brushed against my fingertips, and I forced myself to banish those risky thoughts. After several failed attempts, his tie remained immaculate, whilst I had already accidentally loosened his shirt collar and several buttons in the process…

MC: (W-what do I do now…)

My mind was mush. My vision blurred, and refused to focus on anything other than Zuo Ran’s neck as his Adam's apple bobbed when he swallowed. His collarbone peeked out from his dress skirt, and I could see the beginning of a plane of hard muscle.

MC: “!!!”

MC: (I should have looked up a tutorial…!)

I fumbled through my clutch to retrieve my phone, and searched up how to remove a tie. I finally loosened the tie after following step by step instructions. I didn’t even have time to let out the breath I was holding as a breathy sigh drifted past my ear.

Zuo Ran: “You…”

I raised my head and looked into his deep blue eyes. Blue like fizzy soda bubbles and hazy in condensation. Blue, like the rolling hills covered by rain and mist south of Yangtze River: faint, warm, and endless.  Only then did I notice how close our faces were - close enough to share our breaths.

Zuo Ran: “...”

I bolted from the sofa, banging my back up against the corner of the ottoman.

MC: “L-l-l- Lawyer Zuo! I-I- I only… The tie couldn’t undo you.. No … N-no, I meant that you couldn’t undo the tie… Since you’re awake now, I should-”

I stammered through an awkward explanation and tried to inch my way closer to the door in an attempt to escape.

Zuo Ran: “Don’t… leave.”

Zuo Ran overtook me in a bound as he grabbed me, pinning me flush against the wall. He looked directly at me as he took ragged and needy gasps of air. The smell of his cedar aftershave and fruity champagne hit me full force as my knees threatened to buckle.

MC: “Lawyer Zuo...?”

Zuo Ran swallowed hard, his voice becoming low and raspy.

Zuo Ran: “Why… I’ve told you, to come find me when you run into trouble. Why did you have to… with him…”

MC: “Him…?”

Zuo Ran’s demeanor and questions left me sweating.

Zuo Ran: “Gao… Sheng… Han...“

MC: “O-oh, him…”

I thought about what Zuo Ran told me in the parking lot, and I couldn’t help but feel a twinge of guilt.

MC: “I’m sorry, Lawyer Zuo... At the time I didn’t feel it was right to refuse him… Mr. Gao had been very kind. He helped me with a favor, and even said that he’ll commission us…”

Zuo Ran: “... Very kind?”

MC: “Yes. Don’t worry, I have boundaries, and I would never drink myself silly with other people that easily. Mr. Gao is a good guy, so I-”

Zuo Ran: “How can you be so certain! You just met him for the first time tonight!”

Zuo Ran’s aura changed in an instant, and it felt like we had been transported back to the courthouse, except I’m now on the receiving end of his scrutiny. In the past, seeing Zuo Ran fired up like this would’ve left me motivated by his passion. But now… I stayed trapped like a deer in the headlights, unsure of whether I should fight or run.

MC: “I…”

Zuo Ran: “Do you always trust others this easily!?”

I couldn’t refute Zuo Ran’s point. He was right, I’ve only just met Gao ShengHan, and I couldn’t possibly know what kind of person he truly was. Still, the Guo ShengHan I met at the banquet who was so hardworking and dedicated to his career, who had wholeheartedly put his faith in Themis… I couldn’t help but speak up for him.

MC: “Just because it was the first time we met, that doesn’t mean one is incapable of judging a person’s character. Mr. Gao is very humble, he’s worked hard to get to where he is today… Even with all the fame and fortune, he’s still very approachable…”

Zuo Ran: “Approachable? What kind of logic is that! He’s an actor, aren’t you wary of the fact that he could be lying to you? You would rather trust his word, over mine…”

Lying … to me??? In the heat of the moment, I forcefully pushed Zuo Ran aside out of frustration. Sure, I might not be close to your level of expertise when it comes to the law, but Zuo Ran, must you belittle me and doubt the fact that I can make my own judgements!

MC: “Zuo Ran, just who do you have a grudge with to say all that?!”

I screamed back at him. The silence in the room was palpable after my outburst as a tense air settled in between us.

Zuo Ran: “...”

He must have been taken aback by my reaction. Zuo Ran was at a loss for words, for once.

MC: “Lawyer Zuo… You’ve had way too much to drink tonight. It’s already so late, I gotta go.”

--- PART 5 ---

▌Location- Outside Zuo Ran’s Condominium

After I left Zuo Ran’s suite, I immediately hailed a taxi and went home. But… half an hour later, I had to turn back.

MC: “I accidentally took Lawyer Zuo’s house keys with me…”

When I was trying to bring him back upstairs, I must have pocketed his keys after I pushed open his door while attempting to hold him upright. And after all that happened, I completely forgot about it until now.

MC: “I gotta hurry, otherwise I’ll cause him even more trouble…”

“He’s lying to you…” Zuo Ran’s words came to mind, and my heart squeezed painfully. Is he unhappy with Gao ShengHan? Or maybe, it was out of line for me to pull new clients for us at the banquet?

~~~

▌Location- Zuo Ran’s living room

I unlocked his door with the keys and tentatively peeked in. Zuo Ran wasn’t in the living room.

MC: (He must be in bed by now… Let’s just put his keys back and get out of here, lest I wake him up…)

I cautiously tiptoed into his living room, and was about to set his keys down on the ottoman. Just then, I nearly tripped over a sprawling mass on the carpet - it was Zuo Ran!

MC: “L- Lawyer Zuo!?”

I hastily helped him off the floor.

MC: “Lawyer Zuo! Are you alright! What’s wrong with you?”

Zuo Ran opened his eyes when I shook him awake. His blurry eyes gradually focused on my face, and once he realized that it was me, he reached out and grabbed my wrist.

Zuo Ran: “MC, you… It’s you…”

MC: “Are you hurt anywhere, Lawyer Zuo? How did you end up on the floor? Are you feeling sick? I’ll go bring you a wet towel so you can wipe your face. Hopefully, that’ll help you feel more comfortable.”

I spoke while getting up in a hurry, but Zuo Ran pulled me back. Without any precaution, I fell into his lap. I could feel his body heat and pulse beneath his skin against the palm of my hands, and I jerked my hands away as if I had been burnt by it.

MC: “M-my apologies, Lawyer Zuo! I-”

A pair of hands pulled me flush against him, interrupting my sentence.

Zuo Ran: “Don’t go… Don’t leave me…”

Zuo Ran rested his chin on my shoulder, his bangs tickling my ears. He embraced me gently, as if he was scared of me rejecting his advance, but just tight enough that I couldn’t move, as if he was scared that I would leave.

MC: “I was only leaving to grab you a towel…”

He held me even tighter, ignoring my protests, and muttering to himself over and over.

Zuo Ran: “Don’t leave me… alright?”

His voice rasped in my ear, cracking in a vulnerable way that fell far from his usual composure. Like a soft and unbreakable thread, he had ensnared me in his web.

Zuo Ran: “I’m sorry… I must’ve scared you… It’s all my fault… I’m sorry… So don’t leave me…”

MC: “I…”

Is he like this because I left earlier?

Zuo Ran: “Don’t go…”

MC: “Go… where exactly?”

Zuo Ran: “Don’t go over to stand by his side…”

MC: “Who?”

Thankfully, my mind grew clearer.

MC: “Is… Is this about Gao ShengHan’s commission?”

Zuo Ran pulled me even tighter against him as his arms caged me in. So that’s the reason. Lawyer Zuo misunderstood my intentions and assumed that I was quitting my job at Themis and was planning to work for Gao ShengHan’s studio. That’s why he threw a fit… He wasn’t truly upset at me… I wanted to laugh, but was also touched by his sentiment. I gently patted his back.

MC: “How could I leave Themis just to chase after some celebrity…”

Zuo Ran: “You’re so bright and outstanding, I’m not the only one… everyone can see it. I’m just someone with a bad temper. As your partner… I must have added extra stress to your work, but I… say that you’ll be my partner forever and always, alright? So don’t leave me…”

MC: “Lawyer Zuo, you’re over thinking things. I have no intentions to leave.”

My words must have brought him some reassurance. He sighed, sinking against me as he rested his head against the crook of my neck, all the while slowly caressing my hair and letting it glide between his fingers. The calm and self assured Zuo Ran I thought I knew… turned out to be someone so delicate and childish. Unless this is just the alcohol talking, and he’s just treating everything that transpired today, including me, like a dream…

[Examine his hand in my hair]

Zuo Ran’s hair keeps brushing up against my ear, it tickles. I wanted to reach up and brush it aside, but I accidentally brushed his cheek.

Zuo Ran: “I… Must be so dull… Celebrities, they must be fun to be around… You’ll be happier with him… Right?

MC: “How could I be…”

Zuo Ran: “You smiled…”

MC: “What’s that?”

Zuo Ran: “You smiled at him… so many times…”

MC: “Well t-that’s because!”

“Because we were praising you to the high heavens”... How could I say something like that aloud to him…

Zuo Ran: “...No need to cover it up, there’s no need to console me…”

His usual indifference fell through the cracks, his voice sounding incredibly lonely. Is he saying all that to make me consider leaving and collaborate with Gao ShengHan instead? I decided it was probably best not to ask him that.

MC: “It’s true! It’s because… W-we… we were talking about Lawyer Zuo…”

Zuo Ran: “Me? What… about me?

MC: (It’s all good… Lawyer Zuo is so stupid drunk… he shouldn’t be able to recall our conversation in the morning…)

MC: “I told him… that Lawyer Zuo is the best… and that I admire you… Gao ShengHan said… no wonder I was your partner… that we were alike… s-so that’s why I-”

I stuttered through an explanation, feeling the embarrassing twinge of red creep up from my cheeks all the way up to my ears. I felt like I was burning up.

[Examine his arm]

I steadied myself as I held onto Zuo Ran’s arm.

MC: “Er… Lawyer Zuo… Why don’t you have a seat on the couch, does that sound good?”

Zuo Ran: “It’s not good… You’ll just leave me…”

MC: “I already said that I wasn’t leaving…”

Zuo Ran: “You’ll leave…”

Zuo Ran ignored me and continued to slur the same thing over and over, almost as if I’d vaporize into thin air if he let me go. His hot breath fanned across my neck, and I hastily tried to move away from it, only to have him tighten his arms around me.

Zuo Ran: “You said you wouldn’t leave…”

His whining was laced with grief, and I couldn’t help but feel as though I had done something evil.

[Examine Zuo Ran’s neck]

His body heat radiated through my thin dress shirt and settled in my bones.

MC: “Lawyer Zuo… do you feel cold, clinging onto me like this…”

Zuo Ran: “Hah… Cold… You’re cold?”

He pulled me into his lap and pressed me against his chest.

Zuo Ran: “You won’t feel cold like this, right?”

MC: “...!”

[Examine his hand in my hair]

Zuo Ran: “Don’t go…”

MC: “For the last time, I really won’t.”

Zuo Ran: “You kept staring at him… The moment we got there, you were looking for him… You… You even have his photo…”

MC: “I- I was only helping ChengCheng get an autograph.”

Zuo Ran: “Then stay by my side…”

MC: “I will. I’ll stay at Themis, I’ll stay at Themis forever. Because I’m Lawyer Zuo’s partner.”

[Talk to Zuo Ran]

With his head on my shoulder, his breathing gradually grew steady.

MC: “Lawyer Zuo?”

Zuo Ran: “You’re my… destiny…”

MC: “Eh?”

Zuo Ran’s voice fell to an inaudible whisper, I couldn’t comprehend anything he was trying to say.

Zuo Ran: “My everything…”

MC: “Lawyer Zuo?”

I called his name, but received no reply. He must have fallen asleep. I helped Zuo Ran onto the couch, gently laid his head down, and covered him with a blanket. He slept so soundly, it was almost as if I were the one who had hallucinated and conjured up all that had happened, like an out of body experience. But the hammering of my heart told me otherwise. I left Zuo Ran’s suite in a hurry.

--- PART 6 ---

▌Location- Themis Law Firm

The day after the banquet, I handed Gao ShengHan’s autograph to ChengCheng who was waiting by the door, and she held up the photo and cheered.

ChengCheng: “MC, you’re the best! I love you!”

MC: “You should save words like that for your idol.”

ChengCheng: “Of course I will say it to him! But, you deserve my love, too!”

ChengCheng hovered around me excitedly, but then, she pushed up her glasses and settled down.

ChengCheng: “Hang on, why are your dark circles so deep! The banquet ended early enough, didn’t it? I remember that you sent me the video recording at around 9PM. Did anything happen afterward? Unless you had too much to drink and didn't rest well?”

MC: “N-nothing like that happened! I just didn’t sleep well, that’s it!”

My heart pittered loudly when last night’s events rushed to mind. I cautiously peeked around the corner at Zuo Ran’s office, and let out a sigh of relief when I saw that it was empty.

MC: (Lawyer Zuo was completely wasted last night, he probably won’t come to work today right… How fortunate… I don’t know how I should approach him now…)

Just as I was lost in thought, ChengCheng nudged me with her elbow.

ChengCheng: “Good morning, Lawyer Zuo!”

Zuo Ran: “Morning.”

Zuo Ran looked at the signed photo in ChengCheng’s hand, coughed awkwardly, then looked at me.

Zuo Ran: “Uhm. Hold on, come see me in my office.”

MC: “Al-alright.”

I watched Zuo Ran walk away, my heart threatening to jump out of my throat as I stood anxiously.

MC: (Why would Lawyer Zuo want to see me… What if he remembers what happened yesterday?!)

~~~Flashback~~~

Zuo Ran: “You smiled at him… so many times…”

MC: “It’s true! It’s because… W-we… we were talking about Lawyer Zuo…”

Zuo Ran: “Me? What… about me?

MC: (It’s all good… Lawyer Zuo is so stupid drunk… he shouldn’t be able to recall our conversation in the morning…)

MC: “I told him… that Lawyer Zuo is the best… and that I admire you… Gao ShengHan said… no wonder I was your partner… that we were alike… s-so that’s why I-”

~~~Flashback ends~~~

▌Location- Zuo Ran’s office

MC: (I’m so embarrassed…)

I begrudgingly followed Zuo Ran into his office, I didn’t dare look at him, so I kept my head down and stared at the corner of his desk instead.

Zuo Ran: “You mentioned last night that Gao ShengHan wished to collaborate with our law firm for legal consultation in regards to his studio. After confirming the details of the commission with the other party, you may proceed with the contracting process. Startups start from zero, labor and management legal services will be a routine task for you. Risk prevention, business forms and contracts, terms and conditions, of the sort… you must meticulously plan, formulate, construct, and maintain them all.”

Zuo Ran’s voice rang true and indifferent like it always had, like we had returned back to status quo.

MC: “...”

Zuo Ran: “Any questions?”

MC: “None.”

My mind was still reeling from last night’s events, and I couldn’t ask him anything even if I wanted to.

Zuo Ran: “Providing legal consultation for a new business will be a good challenge for you. If there’s anything you’re unsure of, feel free to ask me. Ah, also…”

He hesitated before speaking again.

Zuo Ran: “The entertainment industry… is shrouded in gossip and fake news. If you meet the client alone, it may cause unscrupulous articles to spread. If you’re going to meet with the other party… you must tell me- I’ll go with you.”

MC: “Yes, I know.”

Zuo Ran’s indifference was a great relief to me. It seems like he doesn’t recall what happened… After I came down from my personal emotional rollercoaster, I noticed an ounce of regret peeking out in the corner of my heart… and I understood it less than I understood how it got there in the first place.

MC: “Then, if Lawyer Zuo has nothing else to add, I’ll go and get started!”

I hurriedly scampered out of Zuo Ran’s office.

~~~

After watching the girl leave his office, Zuo Ran relaxed and sank into his seat. Like the way a delayed reaction would be, the back of his ears grew red and hot to the touch.

Zuo Ran: “... I’m sorry… I…”

Zuo Ran paused as the blush creeped from his ears to his cheeks, then he pulled out a small hair tie from his suit pocket. This was left by her last night - and was the tangible proof he needed to convince himself that what happened last night wasn’t a dream.

Zuo Ran: “And now… I don’t know how I can return this to you…”

The silky hair tie in his hands felt just like the way her hair had flowed between his fingers.

Zuo Ran: “In the future…”

Zuo Ran coughed lightly as he looked at the hair tie with quiet eyes.

Zuo Ran: “In the future, I’ll definitely return this to you.”

To the beautiful young eagle that spreads her eager wings and takes to the sky, chasing after a life that she yearns for… If she should fly to places further and further away, then all one can do is encompass the entire sky so that she will stay within reach.

——————

《CREDIT》 Translator: @humi-and-co​​ Editor: @hallowsivy​ 《未定事件簿》Tears of Themis is a 2020 Chinese otome game by 米哈游Mihoyo. All original credits go to 米哈游Mihoyo.

《 VOICE ACTORS 》  Zuo Ran | Zhao Lu: https://weibo.com/mzhaolu Zhai Xing | Fan Churong ChengCheng | V-17 Xiao Zheng: https://weibo.com/u/7360058865

[an-ambivalent]

Uchiha Therapist: Part I

Synopsis: Yandere! Madara x Reader x Yandere! Sasuke 

 [Name] is a struggling post graduate psychology student who has more on her plate than she can handle. Between her practicums to gain work experience and writing reports, to trying to maintain a decent lifestyle and look after her own mental health, there is little to no time left to work an actual paying job. Yet, money is essential for survival. So,  she does the next best thing that has been trending recently to assure a good paycheck; she becomes a sugar baby. The only thing is, [Name] is unaware that she’s become sugar baby of the Madara Uchiha, the notorious CEO of Uchiha Corporation. She is also unaware of the fact that she’s the therapist of his nephew Sasuke Uchiha, who has begun treading over the professional boundary of a patient, and has started developing an abnormal fixation for his therapist since she seems to be the only one who actually understands him.

Warning: Although this story will come to contain yandere themes that can be triggering or uncomfortable to read, there are no yandere themes present  in this chapter. It does have mentions of negative and tiring thoughts that may be triggering. Read at your own risk. This work is purely fictional and any yandere or other toxic behaviours that may be present in the future, know that I do not condone such behaviour. 

Word Count: 4K 

--

Story start; A day in the life of [Name] 

On the night that started it all, when [Name] was feeling particularly disheartened and dissatisfied with her life, she had vented her frustrations and sorrow to her good friend Ino Yamanaka. Although many things in her life were going right, and she was privileged enough to have the chance to pursue her wanted career, it came at a cost. Her entire life schedule was fixed around her post graduation studies, other little spared time was for cooking and doing chores, and the rest was for sleeping. [Name] lacked the time for earning money, and doing things that were higher on Maslow’s hierarchy of needs — dating to find someone to create a meaningful connection with, or working on her previous hobbies. 

The two friends had been consuming enough booze to be a little more than tipsy but not enough to be drunk. Some words were slurred, the fine motor control had decreased a bit, and with their faces slightly flushed, Ino was convinced that she had the best idea to [Name]’s problems. 

Giggling at her own idea, Ino had snatched [Name]’s laptop from in front of them, and tapped various keyboard keys for joogle to search up. Once she saw the results, she clicked on one of the many websites shown as a result, and after a few more minutes of more clicks and keyboard taps, she had turned the laptop towards [Name] to see, with a triumph grin on her face. 

“A sugar daddy,” Ino claimed proudly. 

[Name] raised an eyebrow. “What?” 

“A sugar daddy — it’s the perfect solution for your troubles. Not only will you get to earn more than enough, it covers the dating aspect too! Someone to spend your time with, to sleep over with — just without getting too attached. You’ll have a social life once again that doesn’t consist of you drinking booze with me or our other friends and you can finally afford to look decent again,” Ino explained straightforwardly. 

[Name]’s eye twitched. “What do you mean finally afford to look decent again?” she inquired in a low voice, and glared at Ino, who smiled sheepishly at her. 

“Well you’ve been a fashion disaster for sometime now—“

“Sorry I don’t have rich parents like the rest of you to buy me extravagant brands,” [Name] retorted, and a tick mark of anger bulged on Ino’s head. 

“Well Sakura is a commoner like you too and even when she was a starving student, she still had a fashion sense. You don’t need to buy something expensive like jucci to look decent!” Ino snapped, and [Name] scowled at her. 

“Whatever. This discussion is pointless anyway since I’m not going to become a sugar baby,” [Name] responded, and went to grab a bottle to consume more alcohol.  However, the uneasy and anxious expression that Ino wore made her halt amidst her movements. All of a sudden, a cold shiver ran down [Name]’s back, and she felt a sense of dread building up in her gut. 

“Please tell me you didn’t,” [Name] pleaded and Ino winced inwardly, before she turned the laptop around to show [Name]. 

“I did… I already signed you up. You have a date with him this Friday night.” 

“INO!” 

That was the gist of how [Name] had become entangled in her predicament with Madara Uchiha, and what was meant to be nights for [Name] giving her daddy some casual sugar, turned into an diabetic sugar addiction. 

It was baffling really, how as children, people can be better in following orders than they can be as adults. And for someone like [Name], who had been studying psychology for years now, and began to work with the theories, one would think that practicing what she preached would be easier; she was great at helping her clients, but not much at helping herself. 

“Make sure you don’t go with strangers” — a lesson that had been engraved in children at school and from their parents for their own safety. It was one of the most basic rules of common sense to evade danger; however, it was the rule [Name] failed to follow. Instead of not going through with her fixed date with a sugar daddy, who was a complete stranger and who knows pose what danger, she had gone through with it. And she had not even taken any caution to have their first meeting in a public place, no. She had gone to his home, which was the only place he accepted for their meeting, because she was too anxious to say no or not go through with it. 

She really wondered how she was able to help her clients so well when she could not even manage her own anxiety. 

So, now, here she sat. Since by Ino’s definition, [Name] was a walking fashion disaster, the blonde had refused to let her go without her help. Their tastes differed, but even [Name] had to admit that Ino had done an incredible job in helping her choose an outfit that was suited to her tastes. Granted, it was skimpier than what she usually wore and more figure defining, but it did make her look really nice. She did not look like a savage mess with evident dark eyebags who appeared to have just gotten out of bed and went to work straightaway like she did on a daily basis. But she felt exposed and uncomfortable in the setting she was not accustomed to.

The penthouse she had been invited to was extravagantly luxurious; the small dining for the two of them (her and soon to be her sugar daddy) was right next to the giant window in the living room that showed a beautiful night view of the Konoha city. Lighting in the room was ambient and romantic, and there was a small pizza, that looked ridiculously expensive for what it's worth, and red wine settled before her. While she did not want to indulge in such luxury, feeling on the edge of the seat because of how her sugar daddy to be was scrutinizing her with calculating onyx eyes, and never being the one to refuse free food, she mindlessly ate it, refusing to meet his eyes. 

“You know, usually you’re supposed to make conversation and sell yourself to try and convince me of why I should stick with you rather than someone else,” Madara spoke, and this was so abrupt and unanticipated on [Name]’s part that she froze half way through biting her food. Her cheeks felt hot in embarrassment, and she awkwardly coughed loudly before looking up at Madara. Although he found her antics to be somewhat adorable, he kept a straight face. After all, to gain the attention of a man of his status, there were many who did the strangest things to appease him. Madara was not a man to be tricked so foolishly. 

“Why should I sell myself when you haven’t convinced me to why I should be your….uh, sugar b-baby rather than s-someone else’s?” [Name] responded. She had started off strongly, but near the end when it came to referring to herself as a sugar baby and realisation of the situation sunk in, she felt herself become more flustered. 

Now, it was not odd for people to be intimidated by Madara. However, acting in confidence at the same time, and to question his authority, that was new. The corner of his lips twitched upwards in amusement. He leaned back in his chair and raised a fine black eyebrow at [Name]. 

“And why should I have to sell myself to you? I’m the one who, essentially, is paying for everything,” he challenged, and [Name] scoffed at him. 

“Yeah, I’m sure that’s really costing you,” she mumbled under her breath, before clearing her throat. “Someone else can pay me too.” 

“You had no reviews on your profile, you’re lucky that I even chose to click on it. Usually, it’s hard to get started since no one bothers with anyone with no reviews.” 

[Name] shrugged. “That was your own choice, don’t shift the situation onto me. And besides, how do you know it's only reviews that count online? I might know a lot of other sugar daddies I had in my past that desperately want me but it's lucky that I chose to give you, a stranger, the chance.” 

Madara was amused by the fact that [Name] had used his own logic against him, and could not help but smirk. Even though it was more than obvious through her behaviour that she was an absolute newbie to this, he decided to humour her. 

"Well, I am an Uchiha," Madara said simply, as if that sole reason explained everything. 

[Name] blinked in confusion. "Uhhh, okay…? Well, I'm [Surname]. That explains why you should choose me.” 

This time, her response really did leave Madara confused. His eyebrows were furrowed and there was clear confusion written on his face. 

“You don’t know the Uchiha?” he asked incredulously. The urge to sigh in an exaggerated manner and snap at him was strong, but [Name] decided against it. With the way he spoke in that condescending tone, and expected [Name] to treat him as if he was of utmost importance, made it more than obvious to her that he was used to being treated as the highest authority. Perhaps he was of importance and not watching herself around him could lead her into a huge mess. But [Name] did not particularly care about his status or whatever he had going on that made him expect her to seemingly kiss the floor he walked on. If she cared about authorities and sucking up to people, then she would not be training to be a therapist in the first place. There were going to be times when she would have to fight authorities and regulations with her sweat and blood for the sake of her clients. And really, if [Name] did care, she would not have been here in the first place -- having dinner with a complete stranger. 

“Uh I do?” she said, but it sounded more like a question. Madara opened his mouth to respond to her, but he shifted the focus of the conversation to another topic. He felt even more perplexed by [Name] now because how could she not know the Uchiha? 

“Nevermind, it’s not of importance. Tell me, why are you in this line of business? You don’t seem,” fit for it, he wanted to say, but chose his words carefully. “The type to want to do this.” 

In response, [Name] felt flustered. She wondered if it was really that obvious that she was not used to it and Madara was simply humouring her. She could very well tell him the truth that it was because Ino had tricked her into it. However, that would make her seem gullible. Now that she may be committing to this, she knew she needed to build a good reputation for herself. She decided to tell the half-truth. 

“I need the money,” she answered in a murmur, before she brought the glass of wine to her lips, and took a huge drink from it. 

Madara watched her with analytical eyes as she downed her alcohol, taking no moment to savour the taste. He had also noticed how she was on her third plate of their dinner and wondered if she had any decency and how she was capable of eating so much. 

“Your job doesn’t pay you enough?” he asked in a genuinely concerned tone, before he followed [Name]’s example and downed his remaining wine in one go too. He had never done that before, and after finishing it, he had to admit there was an odd sense of satisfaction of not savouring its every taste and drinking it all together at once. 

Madara was staring at her with anticipation and worry embedded deep in his ebony coloured irides. Frankly speaking, [Name] had not have someone look at her with such concern in a long time. Generally, on the rare occasions she did speak freely about her worries, whoever she shared her problems with would give her their own input rather than simply listening to her and asking her the right questions that would help her discuss or figure out her own problem. The sight of it made her heart beat faster, and she unknowingly found herself talking before she even what she was doing.

“It’s not that… Well, actually I don’t even work. I barely have time to breath, working is my last priority right now,” she murmured, nervously fiddling with her fingers, as she observed Madara from the corner of her eye.

“While I cannot relate to your financial struggles, I understand the situation you’re in. Becoming so busy because of a goal you once had, that you question whether it’s even worth pursuing it anymore. You lose sight of who used to be and the things that brought you pleasure. There’s always something to do that you can’t even remember the last time you truly felt alive,” Madara said thoughtfully, and his words caused [Name]’s eyes to widen. 

“And no matter how much you want to try and change things, it just feels like you’ve been stuck in the same cycle and it keeps repeating over and over and over again,” [Name] murmured, sighing dejectedly. “I really hate the world.” 

Madara chuckled at her declaration as he lifted another bottle of wine that was on their table. 

“Me too. Why don’t we discuss more things we hate about the world and learn about what we in common over more wine?” he suggested. The edge of suspicion and tenseness he held before was no longer present. Instead, he was now feeling much more relaxed than he had in awhile, and felt intrigued about [Name]. The twinkle in his eyes in hopes to talk to her more caused her lips to stretch into a cute flustered smile. 

“Sure.” 

____________________

It was the week which was like the last and there was no change but stress levels felt higher. Even after a decent ten hours sleep, [Name] felt exhaustion crawling like bugs underneath the epidermis layer of her skin. Dark bags were swelled prominently underneath her eyes. Her hair was tied carelessly in a messy bun that fell to one side; it wasn’t pretty like the one’s beauty gurus showed. It was loose but the knot was tight enough to make the weight of the hair feel too evident with each passing moment. Taking a quick sip from her steaming mocha, she greeted the administrators on the front desk that were the first point of contact between clients and the therapists who worked further back in the office. This office was where [Name] was presently working to gain practice experience in her second practicum. Generally, students in training were simply meant to observe and learn. If permission given by their supervisor, they could step in. But in [Name]’s case, for the sake of the story’s plot, the office she had chosen this time were understaffed. And since she already had finished one practicum and had quite a lot of other experiences from volunteering under her belt, she was trusted to work independently with whatever clients may be assigned to her. 

“Good morning Moegi and Konohamaru,” [Name] greeted, and the two looked up from their screens. When they noticed it was [Name], they beamed at her and returned her greeting in response. 

“How was your weekend [Name]?” Konohamaru asked, as he handed her the appointment schedule of everyone she would seeing today. 

[Name] was ready to give her autopilot response of it being "okay" and then quickly shooting a "how about you" like she usually did. However, before those words left her mouth she paused to ponder: truly, how had her weekend been? 

It was okay. Actually, it had been more than okay.

It had surprisingly been a lot of fun. When she had went through with her sugar daddy date, she had somewhat expected that she may end up having sex with a rich man she would not have been attracted to and receive compensation for sleeping with him. But that had not been the case. Madara was quite attractive, and although the dinner date had begun with a few subtle jeers thrown at each other, she had ended up having a good time with him. The fact that she felt safe enough to be vulnerable with him in the way she didn't even feel that level of comfort with her friends, and shared things she hadn't even known she was bottling up - - it was such a profound experience. To go from discussing their hatred for many things, to confessing secrets and feelings they weren't judged for, but rather, listened to, to getting so drunk that they sang cheesy songs and ended the date with their own unplanned karaoke night, it left an odd feeling of satisfaction and joy in [Name]'s chest that she had not felt in a while. The knowledge of knowing that she would be seeing Madara again soon left her feeling embarrassed. 

"It was," she began, and she covered her face with one hand to hide her embarrassment. "Really nice and fun. I had a good time," she murmured somewhat quietly. Then, right away, she scurried off towards her office before they could question her further or talk about their own weekends.

[Name] had left Moegi and Konohamaru surprised with her response, and the two turned to each other wondering if they had heard right. 

It was after lunch when [Name] was indulging in some [favourite fruit] iced tea, hoping some sugar would help her stay awake when she had an appointment with a client she would be seeing for the first time. She had settled her drink on the table beside her, walked through the hallway, and into the main office with reception and waiting area for clients. 

It was there she saw a young man not much older than herself. He had warm ivory skin and black hair bangs that framed his face. The back of his head looked like a duck’s butt. He must have heard her footsteps because before she even called out his name, he had looked up. When her eyes met his, she took a sharp intake of breath because he looked oddly similar to Madara. The way his obsidian eyes scrutinised her made her feel uneasy. Nonetheless, she gave him, what she hoped appeared to be a welcoming and reassuring smile. 

“You are Sasuke?” she assumed, and he stood up. 

“Hn,” Sasuke responded simply, and at the lack of any greeting or even a facial expression caused [Name] to sweatdrop. But nonetheless, she carried on like she did with all of her patients. 

“Before we start your session, did you want anything? A hot chocolate, coffee, water?” 

Sasuke raised an eyebrow at this before he replied nonchalantly. “A black coffee.” 

[Name] nodded and just before she could speak once more, a head of messy black curls invaded her vision and she was greeted with a smile that was almost too falsely cheerie for her taste. 

“Hello! I’m Shisui, Sasuke’s cousin. And stoic face over there is Itachi, Sasuke’s brother. You forgot about us Miss. Therapist,” Shisui greeted brightly. At his exuberant persona, Sasuke glared at him. The one who he had introduced as Itachi, sighed, and [Name] looked at them apologetically. 

“Oh sorry, I didn’t notice you. Can I get anything for you as well? If you’ve been with Sasuke until this point, I can assume you’ll be staying with him.” 

Itachi nodded and stepped up front and held out his hand for [Name] to shake, which she obliged to almost instantly. 

“Yes. We are here to oversee my little brother’s recovery at my Father’s orders and make sure there is progress,” he explained simply. His words were harsh. It was evident in the way Shisui had become tight lipped, and how Sasuke had now averted his glare onto Itachi. [Name]’s eyes shifted to observe their reaction and then returned to Itachi who was looking at her stoically. It wasn’t too obvious. However, she noticed with the way Itachi’s jaw was clenched more tightly than it had been before. This change in his body language clearly indicated that he had not wanted to say what he did and he did not want to be here. And from the intense glare Sasuke regarded him with, [Name] safely assumed that whatever was going on with Sasuke, Itachi seemed to be a part of it. Underneath Itachi’s pretty eyes, she noticed a sense of tiredness that was all — physical, mental, emotional and more. She saw that same sense of exhaustion on her own face each day. 

The session had not even started and this was already turning out to become so complicated. [Name] hoped she would still have her sanity by the time she graduated and came to do this full-time. There were some of her colleagues who never bothered with rules or following basic procedures to assure their clients comfort and wellbeing. Lucky for her clients, she did. And when she needed to, she would bend over backwards and willingly go beyond her capabilities for them. 

She knew from the way they all held themselves, and particularly with how Itachi had spoken that they were of important status. Their ‘father asked [them] to be here’ was a subtle way of implying that she could get in huge trouble if she did not comply with them. But [Name] just didn’t care. 

She turned to Sasuke with a stern look on her face and motioned towards Shisui and Itachi. 

“Do you want them there to support you or would you feel more comfortable with just you? Either way is fine. It’s your decision,” [Name] said smiling at him. 

The three raven-haired males that had been introducing themselves moments ago stilled and their eyes widened in shock. Shisui was the first one to snap out of it. 

“Uh, Miss. Therapist, I don’t think you know—“ 

“I know what I’m doing. Please refrain from implying such things and let my client decide for himself,” she retorted, narrowing her eyes. Shisui went to warn once more, but he was stopped by Itachi, who shook his head. 

Itachi’s gaze went to Sasuke, and then back to [Name] as he spoke. 

“I’m sure she knows what she is doing. We all wish for Sasuke’s wellbeing. We won’t intrude if he doesn’t want us to,” he proclaimed. That was his way of hinting for Shisui to drop the subject, and reassuring both Sasuke and [Name] that he was on their side, particularly with Sasuke, letting him know that he would not let their father find this out. 

“Aniki,” Sasuke murmured in disbelief, staring at his brother for a few moments. Then, he looked back at [Name] to see she was still giving him the same sweet and gentle smile she had greeted him with. 

Maybe, perhaps, this time, signing up for therapy would be worth it. Maybe he could allow himself to talk to her and not fear judgement and consequences like he had with his previous therapists. 

“I’d like it to be by myself,” he murmured, looking away from her with slight pink cheeks. As his eyes had drifted away from hers and met Shisui’s, who gave him a warning look, his shoulders tensed and his eyes snapped back to [Name] right away. “P-Please and t-thank you.” 

He did not need to glance at Shisui again to know the oldest male was now grinning at him. 

Seemingly, his politeness seemed to be unexpected and Sasuke wanted to scoff at how [Name]’s eyes had lit up in pride. It almost annoyed him because did they really think he was that dimwitted? 

“You’re welcome. Now, follow me please. Shisui and Itachi, our session will be around an hour so you can come to pick him up in that time,” [Name] said. The two of them nodded and waved the two goodbye as Sasuke followed after [Name] to her office. 

-------

A/N:  (tbh, uhhh, I plan for this to be a yandere story [whispers: eventually] but this chapter is fluffy. I honestly don’t know where I’m going with this or if I’ll add more Uchihas as love interests and turn into a reverse harem for [Name], I’m gonna make shit up as I go along and hope it turns into something decent lol gang gang. I just need to write a story I can write without worries and just enjoy the process of it rather than caring about where it leads. So yeet. I hope you join me on this journey <3)