Alpha-17 and Obi-Wan being friends (derogatory) on 17's part and friends (threatening) on Obi-Wan's part is such an underrated dynamic
They could be so funny and terrifying, like Obi-Wan went through a soul shredding experience with Alpha-17 as his only company. They're friends because what else are you gonna be after you witness each other at absolute rock bottom from torture.
It's like 'dog put in cage of cheetah who's threatening to go crazy', except the dog is a grizzly bear and also threatening to go crazy.
Emotional support trooper except the trooper in question has never done any sort of supporting in his life and is actively an emotional distress trooper to a great number of the CC batch.
I want them texting everyday, I want Obi-Wan mailing handmade BFF bracelets to Alpha and Alpha sending pics back of him flipping off the camera but still wearing them, I want Alpha using Obi-Wan to keep track of and occasionally terrorize his cadets, I want 17 ending problems in the GAR (like Krell) before they begin because Obi-Wan has him shipped out on a personal transport at the first opportunity, decked out with slug-throwers Obi-Wan got him for his decant-day.
Natborn officers think this is all just an odd indulgence of General Kenobi, the Vode, however, correctly identify it as a goddamn threat and their danger assessment of Obi-Wan ticks up significantly.
When Alpha arrives on Kamino, Shaak Ti presses a shiny new comm into his hand. It has the Jedi Order symbol painted onto it alongside a smiley face sticker, and it pings immediately with a new message: Hello! I hope you're settling in well!
Alpha stares at the message, stares at the singular contact named 'OWK' and then stares Shaak Ti in the eye as he pitches the comm straight into the ocean. Shaak Ti's serene smile only grows larger as she calmly reaches into her robes and pulls out an identical comm, only this one has a frowny face sticker, and presses it into his hand. It lights up: I'm afraid we've bonded, Alpha :). Alpha shuts it off and pockets it with resignation.
Cody arrives on Alpha-17's personal recommendation.
A-17: He's the most difficult little bastard I have. You're perfect for each other.
OWK: Thank you, he's very handsome :3
A-17: No. Stop.
The first thing he asks once he gets comfortable is who his general is texting so much that has him swinging his legs and twirling his hair. Cody assumes it's Anakin, given they seem joint at the hip anyway, but little does he know Obi-Wan's ability to consistently have the Weirdest Relationships Ever.
"Oh, it's Alpha-17, I understand you're familiar with each other?" Hmm. OK. Cody.exe is experiencing a processing error, please hold. He exits the room instead of answering. The next day he peeks over the General's shoulder when he's texting and sees walls of rambling messages from Obi-Wan. Alpha-17 replies every hour with a single text: Lose this number. Obi-Wan giggles. "He's so funny." he says.
When Obi-Wan meets the rest of the CC batch, Cody makes sure to stand perfectly angled so that he can record the reactions when his general cuts off their introductions with "Oh, no need, Alpha-17's told me all about you." It's always immediate FEAR.JPG followed by a slow spiral of What The Fuck.
What do you mean by that General. What does that mean Cody. What do you mean they text. No. Cody. What the fuck is happening, Cody. Alpha-17 doesn't have friends he has enemies and enemies he tolerates enough not to shoot on sight.
OWK: Wolffe reached for his vambrace? when I mentioned you
A-17: That's where he keeps his spare knife.
OWK: Hm that does explain the way he eyed me up, ambitious.
A-17: Clearly not enough, he should have followed through. I taught them better.
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We were robbed of a Hueso Jr. episode because good god I need he and Leo to interact.
I can just imagine an episode where a very busy Hueso has no choice but to ask Leo to babysit, and Leo’s like heck yeah I’d rock at that.
And of course Hueso is constantly like oh god what if something goes wrong that’s PEPINO he left with his CHILD.
So continuously throughout the episode he imagines the worst case scenarios for what could possibly be happening.
Every time Hueso imagines another catastrophic scenario the scene cuts back to Leo and Hueso Jr just calmly watching a movie or playing a game or something else equally as innocuous.
Eventually the worry gets to Hueso so much that he cuts his business short and races back home to see -
A peacefully sleeping Hueso Jr smiling as he lays snuggled up next to a shockingly quiet Leonardo.
He’s pleasantly surprised, and agrees to ask for Leo again next time he needs a babysitter.
Or, as it seems he may need to, when Hueso Jr. wants Leo to visit.
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"i want to get married."
iwaizumi's head snaps up at your statement his attention diverted from his phone to you and his brows furrow in confusion "what?"
"i want to get married." you repeat yourself again, leaning back against the couch cushions and throwing your legs over the armrest.
iwaizumi scoffs, a confused smile on his face "this is the last joke, right?" he questions, frowning down at you as you're looking up at him — it's a bit late into the afternoon, but too early for you to start saying nonsense since you've always been so adamant about not getting married.
you roll your eyes at him, "no." and iwaizumi's frown deepens, "are you okay?" he asks.
you scowl at him "the hell's that supposed to mean?"
he shrugs, his gaze turning back to his screen "just...you're being weird again."
"you're so rude and for what." you huff, rolling your eyes again, you cross your arms, now staring at the ceiling above, "i want to get married, haji."
"can't help you with that." he's still scrolling through his phone, not paying much mind to you.
"i want to have like, a las vegas wedding." you say, and iwaizumi turns off his phone — now you've captured his attention since he stares at you as if you've grown two head, you grin at his expression and iwaizumi assumes the worst — is it that you're suggesting you want to go to las vegas? it is only a four hour drive from california after all.
"a las vegas wedding?" iwaizumi questions as if making sure he heard you correctly.
"yeah like, you know, the ones in those casinos?" you gesture around with your hands as if to emphasize your point, "like i wanna throw on a white dress — but like, not the puffy ones, like a party dress, sequins and glitter one — or you know what, actually, a puffy dress would be awesome." you ramble on, iwaizumi's looking down at you, amused, "anyway, what i'm saying is that i wanna get absolutely hammered, throw on a white dress and get married in vegas."
iwaizumi snorts, "who you gonna get married to?"
"i don't know." you shrug, you reposition yourself now so that your head is laying in his lap and you look up at him, grinning mischievously, "you."
iwaizumi's eyes slightly widen, the tips of his ears turning pink and he groans, pushing you off of him, "you're so weird." he may have pushed you a little too hard that you fell off the couch with a dull thud.
he tries to ignore his skipped heartbeat as your laughter echoes through the living and iwaizumi's hand is curled at his mouth to hide his smile, "come on." you chide, "you know — say, we do get married in vegas, technically then, you'll only be married in vegas."
iwaizumi frowns, "that's not true, who told you that?" you're looking up at him with an entertained smile on your face, "you know, it's way too easy get married in vegas, right? why do you think so many people get married accidentally when they're drunk?"
iwaizumi scoffs, and leans back on the couch, arms crossed — it was a calm afternoon on his day off until you started on with your marriage shit, but unfortunately ( fortunately ) for him, you were his best friend, and roommate, so he had to put up with it, even if he has to pretend to be annoyed sometimes.
he says, "i really hope one day you'll finally mature enough that you stop saying weird shit all of the time."
you laugh, "you're just jealous you can't be as creative as me." iwaizumi rolls his eyes, watching as you get up from the ground and walk closer to him, too close actually that your face is right up his, "but it's fine, i'll get that vegas wedding one day."
you laugh, drawing back away from him and iwaizumi looks away, a slight blush tinting his cheeks, "yeah, dream on."
you hum in response, and with the way your gaze seems to be a bit too distant, iwaizumi assumes you've gone off on to your own little world now, you're no longer looking at him, instead staring at the tv that has a spanish show playing that neither of you understand, but he knows you're not listening when he mumbles a soft, "maybe even a real wedding." under his breath.
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