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fallingdownhell · 2 years

Text

Genshin Men reacting...

.. to someone talking down on you

Including: Diluc, Ayato and Tighnari

Summary: after a very long day the last thing you expected to happen was to be confronted with some rude person making unnecissary comments. Your boyfriend catches wind of it and just can't let that happen...

Content Warnings: gender neutral reader; canon universe; established relationship; cursing; maybe slighly ooc; people being mean but getting told off; little bit (also mentioning) of bullying (I do NOT agree with anything that this character is going to say!);

Word count: 3.6k words

Please feel free to point out any grammar or spelling mistakes to me! Also, if the format or anything seems off, I apologize but this is my first post and I wrote this on my phone. I'm still trying to get used to all of this.

Ayato

Being with the head of the Yashiro Commission was difficult sometimes. Not because you didn't love him - Archons knew that you did - but rather because of his unique circumstances.

Given the position that he was in, many people had their attention on Ayato which was not always a good thing. He may have been a sweet and caring boyfriend, but only in the familiar surroundings of his estate, where all his servants had been ordered to not speak a word about your relationship.

Because, even though Ayato loved you, he didn’t want it to become public, mainly for two reasons. The first one being that he wanted both of you to be absolutely sure of your feelings for the other before announcing anything. Could you imagine the drama and talk in the town if he were to announce that he had a partner, only for them to be gone within the next few weeks because things just didn’t turn out the way he expected them to? Again, Ayato was sure of his love for you and he wanted you to be together, but he also wanted to make sure that you were certain as well.

His other reason for keeping your relationship under the radar was exactly the topic of attention. Not everyone liked being the center of it, even less if it was guaranteed that you would be the talk of the town for at least the next few weeks if you guys were to go public. He just didn’t wish for you to have to deal with any of that. Not when your relationship was still this new. And if he was being honest, he quite enjoyed the moments of solitude he could get with you like this.

Although, he had to learn the hard way that things could go terribly bad as well, if you keep them a secret for too long.

It has been a less stressful day today, so Ayato decided to go outside for a walk to catch a bit of fresh air and stretch his tired bones. He didn’t bother telling Thoma or any of the other housekeepers, they could handle themselves for a few minutes without him. And if they needed something urgent of him, he was sure he could still tend to it once he returned.

Walking out of the estate, Ayato decided on a whim to make this supposed short stroll indeed a longer one, so he could go to Inazuma City and maybe get himself a Boba he didn’t get to enjoy for a long time now. Maybe he could even grab a special one for Thoma to try and a more... reasonable one for you.

Happy with this idea and a smirk already forming on his lips, he quickly changed directions to the city.

Within an hour, Ayato arrived at the outskirts of the town. People started whispering among themselves, heads turning after him, questioning what he could want here, since he was not exactly a common visiter.

Most people only knew the Yashiro Commissioner from tells and tales, since he prefered to stay in his estate. Only for official gatherings of events did he come to Inazuma City, so what could he want here on the most normal of days?

Ayato didn’t pay it any mind though, as he casually walked up the stairs to where he knew his prefered stall was, but after arriving at the top, the peaceful atmosphere was quickly interrupted by two people arguing. One of which Ayato knew all to well.

“... said NO! How many times do I have to repeat myself?”

Normally, after hearing this, the Commissioner would not hold himself up with trivial arguments such as these. He would simply bring it to the attention of some nearby guards for them to deal with it. But, given that you were involved in this, he just couldn’t ignore it. Abandoning his usual procedure completely, he quickly made his way over to where he heard your voice coming from, able to hear the conversation taking place more clearly the closer he got.

“Come on! Why you gotta be so difficult? ‘S not like you’re already taken, right? So, just come with me and I’ll show you a good time, I promise~”

“Let go of me, you creep!”, you yelled as you yanked your hand out of his grip. You couldn’t remember for how long you had to deal with this insistent jerk already, but you were fed up. No matter how many times you turned him down, he just wouldn’t listen. You tried to be nice about it in the beginning, but you were starting to get annoyed now. People on the streets also started to watch this interaction, though no one stood up for you or wanted to help you, so you just had to take matters into your own hands.

“The Hell do you think you’re doing, you bitch?! I’m doing you a favour, inviting you to my home! Who the hell do you think you are, you worthless piece of -!”

While shouting, the man in front of you suddenly raised his hand. Realising, that he was about to hit you, you couldn’t do anything but close your eyes and just hope that it would be over quickly.

Except.. the expected pain never came. Carefully you opened your eyes again, only to realise that someone else now stood between you and your pursuer.

“Wha- the hell do you want? This has nothing to do with you!”

“Oh, but it has everything to do with me if you’re trying to hurt my partner. I can’t let that happen, now can I?”

You were too deep in shock, so you only realised now that it was Ayato, who was standing in front of you, holding that guys hand by his wrist, effectively stopping him from hurting you. His words however only setteled with you a few seconds later. But once they did, you just couldn’t help but stare at him dumbfounded.

“Your... FUCK!”, the man suddenly yelled, janking his hand out of Ayato’s grasp and then ran from the scene like the devil himself was chasing him. The Commissioner didn’t pay it any mind though, rather focusing his attention on you.

“Are you alright, my dear?”

“Yeah, but... Are you? I mean.. you basically just announced our relationship to the entirety of Inazuma..”

“Don’t think of that now. Let them know, I don’t care. So lang as you’re safe, and by my side, I couldn’t care less.

With that, he slowly pulled you into his arms, holding you tightly, not paying any attention to the staring and whispering bystanders. And he meant what he said, nothing mattered more to him than you and your safety.

________________________________

Diluc

Having a relationship with Diluc was not how you had expected it to go. Of course you had feelings for this man for a long time - otherwise you wouldn't have gone into a relationship with him - but you also went into this expecting him to act like his usual self. All stoic, feelings kept under control, never knowing what he was thinking.

But, as a matter of fact, Diluc was nothing like that over the course of your relationship with him. At least, when the two of you were alone or at the comfort of the winery, where he could trust the people around him. Diluc was very much an affectionate and protective lover, always making sure to communicate his thoughts and feelings with you, even if it was a bit awkward for him in the beginning.

It all came as a surprise for you, but it definetly wasn't an unwelcome one. Naturally, it still took his time until he fully opened up to you, told you everything about him. It was the same for you, since you had to deal with some unpleasant events from your past as well. But you managed to help each other through it together, and slowly but surely, you could say that you were starting to feel happy again. Each day with Diluc by your side made you feel like you won the lottery of life itself.

It was still a rather young night, yet you were already halfway through your shift at Angels Share. You had offered your boyfriend to help him out at the Tavern from time to time, which he reluctantly agreed to, but seeing you work happily behind the counter, glad that you could help out your boyfriend, made him feel relaxed as well. At least, for the time being. He still made sure that you wouldn't be overworking yourself or had to deal with any rude customers if he could prevent it.

But, as always in life, happiness doesn't last forever.

As the night went on, more and more people started to gather at the Tavern, most of them looking for some form of relaxation after a stressful day full of work, or just to casually meet with some friends and have a nice chat over some alcoholic beverages. You were working together with Charles, switching between mixing the drinks and serving them to customers, when the door opened again, accompanied by the sound of a little bell hanging above it, signaling that a new customer just walked into the tavern.

“Hey there, welco-..”, you turned to greet the new face, as you always do, but as soon as you recognised the person, your voice died down and the warm smile you usually had on your face also dropped. It couldn’t be. You really thought that you never had to see him again. You were not prepared for this. Charles, who was standing beside you, picked up on your change in behaviour, but had no idea about anything, so he couldn’t really do anything either.

The guy coming into the tavern took a quick glance around the interior, then decided to take place on one of the stools by the barcounter. “Just get me a glass of that dandelion wine that you guys are soo famous for.”, ha said in a dismissive tone while waving with his hand.

Without so much as a word, you went straight to it, hoping that he wouldn’t recognise you, since it had been so many years since you last saw each other. At one point while you prepared his drink, you could feel that he started staring at you. Trying to ignore it, you continued with your work, willing your hands to stop with the shaking. ‘He is just a normal customer. Just keep breathing, you got this’, you kept telling yourself, hoping that it would help calm your nerves.

“Hey... do I know you from somewhere?”

You froze for a second, hoping that he wouldn’t remember or just brush it of. You didn’t answer as you served him his drink, but it would seem that luck won’t be on your side today.

“Wait.. is that you y/n?”

Now the panic really started to settle in, your eyes widend as you looked at him, which was all the confirmation that guy needed.

“I knew it! And seems that I was right about you as well, seeing as you’re working as a mere server here. Told you you could never make something out of you!”, he laughed as he snatched the drink from the counter.

“Okay, I think that is enough.”, Charles chimmed in, having heard the whole thing.

“Chill, I’m just telling the truth. They never had anything to show for themselves, even when we were younger. And by the Archons, your looks didn’t improve either.” He laughed even more after that last comment and you couldn’t do anything about it. You wanted to stand up for yourself, say something to him, insult him back, really just anything. But you were too much in shock, frozen in place, barely able to process what was happening right now.

“Surprised you’re even still in Mondstadt. I thought you had run of to Liyue or whatever, seeing as nobody here would want you as their partner. I mean, what so you have to show for yourself? Definitely not money or looks. Bet you can’t even please someone.”

“That’s it. Get out of my bar, right now!” You heard his familiar voice, but you were too scared to look up, fearing that you would just be able to see the face of that one person you hated more than anything.

“Huh? Who the fuck are you to tell me what to do?”, the guy spoke as he stood up, trying to intimidate Diluc by standing right in front of him, but your boyfriend wasn’t impressed by it at all. More than anything, he was beyond pissed of with that guy.

“I’m the owner of this Tavern, and I’m telling you now, in a nice way, the get out and never set foot in here again. And if I see you here again, or harrassing my partner again, I promise you, it will not end well for you.” Diluc was speaking in a slow and calm manner, but the hidden rage was easily detectable. Your old bully picked up on it as well, as he went past Diluc and out of the Tavern without another word.

Your boyfriend made sure that he was actually gone, before immediatly making his way over to you and embracing you in his arms. It took a little for you to register but you soon clung onto him like your life depended on it, only noticing that tears were escaping your eyes once his coat was already drenched in them. When you realised that, you shoved him away from you.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to -!” You were interrupted by your boyfriends hands softly holding onto your face, making you look him in the eyes.

“Don’t you dare start apologizing to me. You didn’t do anything. I should be the one saying sorry for not arriving here sooner.”, he said, as one of his thumbs slowly brushed over your cheek, which made you smile a little bit.

“But you came, and that’s all that matters. Thank you, Diluc.”

_____________________________

Tighnari

Your relationship with the fennec fox was a very loving one, but also a very exhausting one. His life as a forest ranger was a very busy one, so he often didn’t have as much time for you as he or you would have wished. Nevertheless, you guys always managed to make up for the lost time, no matter how little you got to spend together.

Tighnari treated you with so much kindness, you could basically feel his love and adoration for you with his every word and action. Of course he still kept his foul mouth, even in your relationship, though you knew that he never had any ill intend. And even if an insult did come out of his mouth, directed at you, he always said it in such a loving way that you just couldn’t get it in any wrong way.

Usually, the two of you would wake up in the morning together, either one of you staying in the others cottage almost every night. It became such a normal occurance for you, you couldn’t even remember the last time you slept alone in your bed. Not that you mind, though. You loved waking up to your boyfriend holding you close to his body, feet entangeld with his own, your face pressed against his chest.

If you were to ever tell anyone how affectionate this fox really was, they would probably just start laughing and call you crazy. Everyone knew Tighnari as this stoic, stern man who puts his research above everything. In reality, you were his number one priority, nothing else. When you thought about that, you couldn’t help the smile that began forming on your lips, while you slowly reached out to softly stroke some stray hair out of his face.

Normally, Tighnari would be awake way before you, but today was one of the rare occaisions where he actually slept longer than you, allowing you to admire his beautiful resting face and relaxed expression.

“Enjoying yourself?”, your boyfriend suddenly spoke, his morning voice sounding a bit rough, but it just made you adore him even more.

“Very much so.”, you answered gleefully, as Tighnari slowly opened his eyes, keeping the eye contact with you.

He looked at you a few more seconds before mumbling a quiet ‘Good morning’, then leaning towards you to give you a small kiss to your forehead.

“We have to get up now..”

“Ugh.. can’t we stay for five more minutes?”, you groaned, not quite ready to get up just yet.

“I’m afraid not. We both have long days ahead of us. The sooner we get all of it done, the earlier we can be back again.”, Tighnari said as he already began to peel himself out from under the covers, dragging you along with him in the process because he knew if he didn’t do that, you would just fall back asleep again.

You both went to your morning routines as usual, grabbing something to eat before you both went your seperate ways to take care of your duties for the day.

You and Nasrin were assigned to patrol the forest today, so you went to find her to discuss how you two would be handling it togehter. Meanwhile, Tighnari was staying behind in the village today, since he had some catching up to do with his research and also work on new doses of medicine for Collei.

Time went by quickly while Tighnari was focusing on his work - surprisingly not being interrupted even once - that by the time he leaned back and allowed himself a small break, the sun was already starting to set, though it wasn’t quite sunfall yet.

He was just about to focus back on his work to get a few more pages done, when his ears picked up on some unusual noises outside. He noticed that it was some distant shouting that he was hearing, by an unfamiliar voice at that, so he decided to check for himself what was going on there.

He exited his cottage and quickly located the source of all that noise by the village entrance. He didn’t think much of it in the beginning - probably just some travellers or adventurers who got lost in the forest again and were now complaining about it - but as he got closer and recognised the person on the receiving end of the shouting as you, he wasn’t as relaxed anymore.

“What the hell was even the point of doing all this if you can’t even secure my goods?!”, the man in front you kept shouting, not letting you get a word in. In all honesty, you were getting frustrated and annoyed at that guy.

Here you were, trying to help him when he was getting attacked by a hoard of fungi in the forest, and he had the audacity to complain to you about not being able to save his goods for him. Not like you were busy fighting those monsters of while he cowered behind you like a little kid.

“Look, as I tried to tell you -!”

“I mean, what is a merchant even good for without his fucking merchandise? How fucking incompetent can you be?”

That was the third time the man cut you of and now you had enough of it. You were about to go of on him as you saw your boyfriend approaching from behind the guy. You knew with one glance at his annoyed face that the guy was in for it, so you just couldn’t help the smirk forming on your lips, which the guy in front of you also noticed.

“What the hell is there to smirk about, you little-!”

“Excuse me, I would very much appreciate it if you could stop talking to my partner like that.”, Tighnari said, very matter of factly.

The guy turned around, still pissed of about the situation. “Oh yeah? Then maybe tell your little, incompetent partner to do their fucking job right, then I wouldn’t have to do that!”

“Oh, so you mean, saving your life wasn’t part of their job? Should they rather have secured your goods, leaving you to fend those monsters of by yourself?”

That shut the man right up. You could see his mouth open and close, again and again, trying to come up with some sort of retaliation, but not being able to find one.

“I suggest that you apologize to them and then get out of my village because I sure won’t let someone as rude as you stay here. And make sure to keep clear of the forest, there won’t be any nightly patrols today.”

Clearly fed up with this whole situation, the guy pushed past you, not muttering another word, as he went on the path that lead straight back to Sumeru City. Tighnari had half a mind to go after him, drag him back and make him apologize to you, but he came to the conclussion that that wouldn’t be worth all the effort.

Instead, he let out a long sigh, than looked back at you.

“Are you alright?”

“Yes, just really annoyed with that guy. Honestly, what was even his deal?”

“Some people just see themselves as the center of the universe. Don’t think about it too much.”

“Don’t worry, I won’t. Besides, I think that was pretty cool, how you told him right off. Very attractive~”, you said.

“You Lummox”, Tighnari said as he quickly turned around to hide his red cheeks. You laughed and quickly caught up to him again so you two could start your well deserved evening toghether.

#genshin x reader #genshin impact #kamisato ayato #ayato x reader #genshin scenarios #diluc ragnvindr #diluc x reader #tighnari #tighnari x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin fanfic #ayato x you #ayato x y/n #diluc x y/n #diluc x you #tighnari x y/n #tighnari x you

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mrsnancywheeler · 8 months

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Whatever you do don’t imagine Finnick and his sweet girl becoming intimate for the first time after she is sold. Don’t imagine how as soon as she feels his hands on her she cracks, don’t imagine how Finnick fears reminding her of all the clients, don’t imagine Finnicks sweet girl apologizing for not being able to give him that part of her, don’t imagine how she fights the urge to disassociate during it, don’t imagine how Finnick feels when he realizes that.

Okay…bye :)

tw nsfw and trafficking related trauma

there will be more discussions of this later on in the river but for now...

but I'm definitely not thinking about how

it's just so natural, the two of you have spent your day flirting, laughing, and you're just both in bed. you've been leaving light kisses all over each other's face, light enough to be slightly ticklish and then finnick is actually kissing you. at first it's fine, but then he's deepening it and he's already on top of you so you can feel him growing hard. how his hand that was on your hips is so close to your waist band when you're pulling away. it's too much and you're desperately wishing you weren't, but you're tearing up.

he's looking at you, confused for less then a second when he realizes what it is and off of you as fast as he can be. "I'm so sorry." And he feels so guilty for kissing you like that, for getting turned on by you.

but you're upset with yourself, he's so patient, loving, kind and you can't even be intimate with him. "No, I'm sorry, you deserve better and I really wish I could."

"You don't have to be sorry at all, sweet girl." And he's giving you tissues, making tea, making sure you have all the softest blankets, anything you need to try and help you feel somewhat better.

it takes so long for you to want to be intimate like that again and everytime you notice he might be in the mood, even though he doesn't mention it and acts like he's not, you apologize profusely for not being able to be that girlfriend which he always shuts down, soft kisses to push away your tears

nor am I thinking about

eventually one day you realize you might be finally ready, to be with him in that way again, to give the part of you that's been so hurt to someone willingly

you're sitting by each other on the couch, reading, when you softly take it from his hands and sit in his lap. he laughs lightly, "what do you need, sweet girl?" and you're kissing him and he's kissing back. it's nerve wrecking but you want him so bad, and you feel like you're finally able to try and have that. you're not sure if you can say it so you're just slowly starting to grind on top of him and eventually his hands are on your legs and he's pulling his lips away. he's getting hard and feels so guilty for it, "honey-"

"I want you, Finn." And he's staring at you long and hard trying to decipher if you mean it or just feel obligated because of how long it's been, he dreads you feeling that way. but your eyes are so pleading..

"are you sure?" you're nodding, "because we can stop at any time, I don't want to make you uncomfortable." He's nervous that he'll mess it up, he's wanted you for so long, missed the intimacy and hated himself for it.

"I'm sure." And later he's got you laid out on the bed and he'd ever so carefully taken off you clothes, kissed each part of you, praised you, muttered endless I love you's so you knew how much you meant to him. he needs you to feel loved but used. you're so grateful for it, but also you he's so slow and gentle that it's had you much to worked up with anticipation. "finnick, I'm not made of glass." you say it ever so softly.

"I know, sweet girl, I know. I just don't want to make you think of them, need you to know how much I care. You'll tell me if something's wrong right? I need to know if you need to stop and it's okay if you do."

"of course I'll tell you, Finn." and it would've been true if your body hadn't decided to go on autopilot. the moment he's finally slipped inside you, your brain takes it as a queue to leave. you don't want to, he's so sweet, and you're enjoying it, but your fighting the feeling of drifting away from your body. fighting off the daze you usually fall into and when finnick looks into your eyes he can tell. he knows what it's like, he's done it too many times to count. It's further cemented when you barely process the fact he'd stopped moving.

then his hand is softly caressing your face, his heart aching as he tries to get you fully back, "honey, we can stop it's okay." and your brain has somewhat started to settle

"no, it's okay, I'm fine, Finn. I'm sorry, just got lost."

"this is for you, sweet girl, if you don't want it, that's okay. I wanna make you feel good."

"I'm sorry." You're rubbing your face, trying to keep yourself in the moment. Then he's slowly pulling out, "Finnick..." You're so frustrated with yourself.

"just need to make sure you're okay."

He's so softly tracing calming circles onto your skin and you notice how hard he still is which makes you feel guilty. "Let me take care of you then."

Finnick looks so sad as he shakes his head, "You don't have to just get me off and then clock out for everything else, this is for you too.

"finn, I want you, I don't know why my brain is trying to escape, but I do want you." and he's making sure your being truthful again, so scared you'll lie to make him feel better, pull him into the same fantasy all those horrendous clients have

"why don't you keep your eyes on me then, sweet girl, and tell me how you feel as we go?" and you agree.

it's not necessarily the easiest bridge to cross, but it's baby steps because miss what you had and miss how much your body responded to him, so ever so slowly the two of you find a way

yeah I'm not thinking about any of that

#wanda 💋#finnick odair x reader #finnick odair #finnick odair x y/n #finnick odair fluff #finnick odair angst #finnick odair x reader fluff #finnick odair x you #finnick odair x reader angst #finnick odair fanfic #finnick x you #finnick x reader #finnick imagine #finnick odair imagine #finnick odair smut #finnick x y/n #finnick odair x reader smut #anon

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vbecker10 · 2 years

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Hi I was jw if you could do a Loki x reader where they have a huge fight and then reader leaves for a mission to only come back injured. Loki is given a note from her apologizing to him and when she wakes up he takes care of her apologizing as well? Super duper fluffy ending?

Hey anon!! I have two asks that have very similar ideas so I'm doing them together. I'm sorry if it took me so long to get to it that you sent it again but I really do love this idea. I changed a little bit of it and kinda combined both asks. Hopefully it was worth the wait 💚

That's Not What I Meant

Pairing: Loki x female reader

Warnings: arguing, angst, injury, lots of fluff

Summary: You and Loki have an argument but before the two of you can resolve it, you are called away on a mission for a few days. You return from the mission injured and still hurt by what Loki said before you left but he is determined to show you how much you truly mean to him.

A/N: I threw in Halloween stuff cause it's October so why not right 🎃 lol... also, as usual this got away from me and is way longer then I intended 🤷‍♀️

"Its October first!" you say as you flip the calendar on your kitchen wall excitedly. "Do you know what that means?" you turn towards Loki.

He looks up from the coffee maker, "I would say its Saturday but I imagine that's not the answer you are looking for."

"Its Halloween!" you answer with a wide smile. He rolls his eyes but you catch a glimpse of him smiling before he turns back to face the counter. You move to stand behind him and put your arms around his waist, resting your cheek against his back.

He shakes his head and chuckles softly while he pours the fresh coffee into two mugs. "I was under the impression that Halloween was on the last day of the month, not the first," he says.

You groan, letting go of him so you can lean your back against the counter next to him. You look up at him, crossing your arms and say, "Technically yes but... we can do Halloween stuff all month."

He takes a sip of his coffee, "A whole month seems a bit unnecessary. Surely one day is enough."

"It absolutely is necessary!" you tell him, a bit louder than you expected to.

He raises an eyebrow then waves his hand for you to continue. "Very well. What did you have in mind, darling?" he asks.

"Everything... Some of the parks here do hayrides, corn mazes and apple picking. I've always wanted to go apple picking, maybe Wanda could teach me how she makes those mini apple crumbles," you say and Loki smiles, you know how much he loves any type of dessert he can get his hands on. "There are tons of haunted houses we can visit of course," you add.

"Of course," he nods dramatically in agreement which causes you to laugh.

"Oh and I feel like you would like pumpkin carving," you say and he tilts his head curiously. "Because you know..." you make a stabbing motion, "Knives and such."

"That seems acceptable," he laughs then leans forward to kiss you briefly. "Anything else, love?"

"Can't forget watching horror movies with lots of junk food and cuddles or scaring everyone on the team," you tell him.

"How could I say no to either of those?" he smiles as he puts his coffee mug on the counter and moves closer to you. He slips one arm around you and you lean against his chest, looking up at him. "It'll be hard to pick a favorite activity but I don't think you can beat scaring the others," he says with a mischievous grin.

You hit his chest lightly, "Want to try picking a favorite again?"

He kisses the top of your head, "Pumpkin carving?"

"You're the worst," you giggle as you pull free. "The correct answer is horror movies and cuddles, obviously. Just for that, I'm picking out our costumes for Stark's party."

His mood shifts suddenly as the playful smile leaves his lips. He picks up his coffee mug and takes another sip. "There's no need for you to do that," he says in a serious tone, "I won't be attending the party." With that, he turns and walks out of the kitchen.

"You don't want to go?" you ask as you follow him into the living room.

He sits on one end of the couch and sets his mug on the coffee table. "Y/N, you know I don't go to Stark's parties. I never have and I see no reason to start now," he says without looking at you.

"I thought we could go together," you say with a hopeful smile.

He picks up his book from the side table and open its, "Why would you think that?"

"Because it would be fun?" you ask, feeling more unsure of yourself with every passing moment.

He looks up at you briefly and then back to his book. "I doubt very much it would be," he says.

You stand across from him in silence, hurt by the thought that Loki didn't even want to consider going with you. Loki has never been one to socialize with the team voluntarily but you had been excited about the idea of finally having a date to one of Stark's parties.

"I know we've only been dating a few months but... I guess I just assumed you would want to go with me," you say quietly.

"Don't Midgardians have a saying about assuming things?" he asks as he turns the page of his book.

"Well, yea..." you put your mug on the coffee table. "Can you not read while we're talking?"

"You know I'm perfectly capable of holding a conversation and reading at the same time," he says without looking up, you wrap your arms around yourself and don't respond. He finally looks up and slides his bookmark between the pages before setting it on the table. "Better?" he asks in a sarcastic tone.

"Oh, is it rude of me to want you to pay attention to me when I'm talking?" you ask, unable to hide your growing annoyance.

"There is nothing to talk about. I have told you I'm not going," he says. "You're more then welcome to go to that ridiculous event alone." He sits back and opens his book again.

"Its not ridiculous," you argue back but he doesn't acknowledge you as he turns the page.

"And I don't... I don't want to go alone. I want to go with my boyfriend. What's wrong with that?" you ask.

"Are you really going to just ignore me now?" you ask when he continues to read silently.

"I'm not ignoring you, I'm just done with this conversation," he says as he flips the page.

"That's not how conversations work-" you say, rolling your eye sarcastically.

"I don't want to be with you Y/N," Loki says in a harsh tone as he slams the book closed.

You instantly take a step back as his words hit you. He stands up quickly, dropping his book as moves towards you. "Go, I meant I don't want to go with you," he tries to correct himself but your mind has already latched onto those words.

"You... don't..." you whisper as you stand in front of him in disbelief, shaking your head slowly.

"No, no. That's not what I meant," he repeats. "Y/N, I didn't mean that."

He reaches for your arm and you pull away from him. "But you said it," you say, you feel as if you're heart is physically breaking. "Why would you say that?" you ask, close to tears.

"Y/N, I-" Loki starts to explain but is cut off by the sound of your phone ringing from the other room.

You turn from him and walk back to the kitchen to answer it. Loki follows you and tries to take your hand but you turn from him. You purposefully stare at your feet while on the phone to avoid looking at Loki who is growing increasingly upset and nervous.

When you hang up from your call with Agent Hill you ask, "Can you please leave? I have to be ready to take off for a mission in twenty minutes and I-"

"Y/N, I'm not leaving until we talk," he shakes his head. He attempts to close the distance between the two of you again and this time you don't move away. You keep your eyes fixed on the ground as tears begin to surface. He touches your cheek lightly but you still don't look up.

"That's not what I meant," he says again and you nod slowly, your heart believes him but your mind won't let go of this words so easily. "Please look at me," he pleads but you can’t.

"I have to get ready," you tell him again in a hushed voice.

"Can we talk when you get back?" he asks and you mumble ok in response. He kisses the top of your head lightly and says, "Be safe, Y/N."

(Three days later)

You limp slowly down the long corridor and find yourself standing in front of Loki's door. You can tell he's awake, most likely reading, when you see the light creeping out from under the door even though it's just past one in the morning.

You stand there frozen for a moment. All you want to do is feel his arms wrap around you but every time you picture him, you hear his voice echo. He said he didn't want to be with you and although he quickly took it back you just couldn't shake it. His words had burned themselves into your thoughts and refused to leave.

You try to take a deep breath and feel a searing pain spread through your left side. You look down at the brace on your left knee and rub your left arm, just above where the cast was set. Shaking your head, you turn to drag yourself the rest of the way down the hall to your room to sleep.

You get a few feet away when you hear Loki's door open and you stop but don't turn. "Y/N, welcome back," he says quietly.

You can feel your heartbeat picking up at the sound of his voice and you can't help but smile a bit. "I've missed you, love," he says, you can hear he's stepped out into the hall.

"I missed you too," you tell him as you turn to face him. You watch as his eyes move up and down your body, filling with concern.

"Y/N, are you alright? What happened?" he asks, standing close to you. You shrug and tell him that the mission was ultimately successful but you were thrown during an explosion at the Hydra base. You had broken your arm and sprained your knee, in addition to being covered in bruises. You tell him you're exhausted and just want to lay down.

He reaches out and takes your hand, "I know you're tired darling, but come with me." You look up at him quietly, he gently strokes your cheek. "Let me take care of you," he says in a soothing voice.

You smile sleepily and nod, absolutely nothing could sound better then letting Loki look after you right now. No matter what he said before you left, you were still completely in love with him, although you had never been brave enough to say it. You squeeze his hand lightly and he leads you back to his room.

Once inside, he closes the door quietly and picks you up careful not to hurt your side or leg. You let out a small laugh in surprise as he carries you bridal style into the living room. "I can walk," you tell him but you make no attempt to be put down.

"Not without being in pain it seems," he answers in a caring tone.

You wrap your good arm around his neck a bit tighter and kiss his cheek lightly without thinking. He smiles when he looks down at you but you can see it doesn't quite reach his eyes. His eyes are red and glassy, his normally silky smooth hair appears slightly tangled and you've never seen his clothing wrinkled before.

You look around as he carries you through his apartment. His space is usually meticulously neat but there are books messily piled on the end table and floor. You notice a pillow and blanket from his bed have been moved to the couch and there are several empty mugs on the coffee table. He walks through the living room and into his bedroom where the bed you've shared is made perfectly, expect for the missing pillow. You realize its the pillow from your side of the bed that's been moved to the couch.

As if he is reading your thoughts he says, "I haven't been able to sleep without you."

You close your eyes, hold him tighter and whisper, "I'm sorry, Loki." You knew how hard the last few days had been for you but you are quickly seeing how badly it had affected Loki as well.

He kisses your forehead as he gently opens the bathroom door with his foot. He sets you down on the countertop next to the sink.

"I understand you're tired but... I just need you to know I'm sorry," he says. "I didn't mean what I said before you left, you know that right? I was frustrated about the party and it just came out wrong. I-" he tells you and you pull him closer to you. You put your good arm around his waist and move your legs to be on either side of him as they dangle over the edge.

You had spent the last three days replaying what Loki said and you can tell he had been too. "I know Loki," you interrupt him. "I know you didn't mean it," you tell him and he breaths a sigh of relief. He strokes your cheek lightly then leans down to kiss you.

When he breaks the kiss, you hide your face against his chest. "Y/N...?" he asks, running his hand up and down your back lightly.

"I'm sorry I pushed you about going to the party. I know you don't enjoy going to them and it wasn't fair that I got upset instead of listening to you," you tell him.

He puts his fingers under your chin and tilts your head so you are looking up at him again. "I will go to the party, I just want to make you happy Y/N," he offers but you shake your head no and he looks confused.

"I don't want to go anymore," you tell him.

"You should go. I know how much fun you thought his last party was," he says.

You smile at him and run your fingers through his hair gently, "I would rather spend time with you, doing something we both like."

He cups your cheek and brings your lips to his. You kiss him back as his hand slides down your back, holding you close to his chest. You giggle when you pull away to breath, "I meant something like going to a museum... but that works too."

He laughs at your response than says, "Well we still have all the things on your Halloween list to get through."

You nod happily as you yawn then groan in pain when your stretching aggravates your sore muscles. His smile fades and he looks concerned again.

"Let's get you more comfortable, darling," he says and you agree.

You rest against Loki with your eyes closed as you listen to the tub full with water. After a few minutes, Loki carefully helps you out of your dirty, bloodied uniform and places you into the warm water. You let out a sigh as your muscles begin to relax from the oils Loki had added. Resting your broken arm on the edge of the tub, you let yourself sink completely under the bubbles.

Loki's kneels behind you and begins to gently unbraid your hair. He runs his long fingers through your hair and then down your neck to your shoulders, massaging all the tension from your muscles. When he finishes, he kisses you softly. "Just rest now, I'll be back in a moment," he says as he gets up.

You nod with a smile, struggling to keep your eyes open. Just as you are about to drift off completely, Loki returns to being you to bed. After drying off, Loki conjures you a soft pair of green shorts and a black tank top to sleep in.

You giggle, half asleep when he picks you up again and carries you into the bedroom. He lays you on the bed and then gets in next to you. At soon as he pulls the covers over the two of you, you curl up against his side.

Loki wraps his arms tightly around you and whispers, "I love you, Y/N."

For a moment, you aren't sure if you dreamed hearing this words or if he actually said he loved you for the first time. You look up at him and when you see his smile, you know you weren't dreaming.

"I love you too, Loki," you confess happily, right before you slip into a sound sleep.

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randomshyperson · 8 months

Text

Fluorescent Adolescent - Heart Shaped Series

Chapter Summary: Layla's presence brings back some ghosts from your past and for the first time, you want to include Wanda in everything.

Warnings: Typical canon violence, mentions of blood, stitches, and pregnancy nausea, talking about abusive environments (innuendo of different forms of exploration), mild angsty with a bit of comedy as well, some Blackhill drama too | Words: 6.935k

A/N-> This chapter is a bit longer but I tried to put more characters background on it. I know it's late, I've been struggling with my writer's block, but it's finally here. I'm also sorry there's no smut on this one, but the chapter mood was not a sexy one. We will be back to our normal schedule I promise. Also, the extra chapter with their first kiss is almost ready as well! So hopefully, the next update won't take that long.

General Masterlist | Wattpad | AO3 | Series Masterlist

-&-

“Do you really have to do that?”

The question drew a confused laugh from you. With your hands busy with a first aid kit borrowed from Natasha, you can only offer a look to your girlfriend.

"Yes?"

But Wanda snorted stubbornly, crossing her arms before stopping in the doorway of the bathroom in Black Widow's room, who was standing outside with the rest of the team. You were supposed to go back outside right away before Layla had a nervous breakdown at being left with the entire Avengers team while you grabbed the kit to fix your own reaction to seeing her and ending up hurting her.

"I just don't understand why you have to do the bandage. Can't you ask Nat or any of them?" Wanda insisted, sounding very irritated and you had no idea why.

"Well, Layla only trusts me of all the people present and I'm the one who threw her against a snack machine." You half-heartedly explain the whole thing. "If you'll excuse me, sweetheart."

Wanda gave you the room but did so with a grimace that you would probably try to understand later. She's been acting so weird ever since your partner arrived, but Layla's presence is making you worried enough. You'd talk to Wanda after you understood exactly what the other woman was doing here.

Outside, and in the outer courtyard that was more isolated from the rest of the motel, Layla was sitting at one of the tables with the Avengers doing a poor job of disguising the fact that they were on alert for her. Sitting down, her jacket was laid beside her, and she was wearing a tank top that exposed the redness of her new bruise and made you groan low in guilt. Wanda, who hadn't left your trail since Layla appeared, glared at you as soon as she caught the sound.

For the witch, she didn't see the bruise but the beautiful woman with well-defined muscles, a tight tank top and curls that made her look even more attractive than before. And you, who apparently had a long-term relationship with the curly woman and were friendly enough for her to come looking for you.

You didn't even notice the look Wanda gave you, busy opening the kit and mumbling apologies to Layla in Arabic that made Wanda spend the next few minutes imagining you learning another language just to talk to your friend.

She was so distracted by her own neuroses that she didn't notice Natasha approaching, and leaning on the pillar she was also resting on.

"Wow, if looks could kill..." teased the widow, but Wanda snorted lowly, ignoring the phrase and trying to pretend she wasn't watching you pull whatever piece of glass the machine left behind in Layla's back, while you whispered apologies to her for it.

Natasha chuckled at the witch's expression and wasn't intimidated by her aggressive attitude. It surprised her that Wanda, a moment later, was the one who started the conversation.

"Do you think they seem close?"

You had just pressed a cotton pad with alcohol on Layla's wound, and because you were sitting next to her, the woman, grunting in pain, instinctively grabbed your thigh.

Nat raised an eyebrow.

"I bet you ten bucks they've slept together." Replied the widow, and Wanda grunted in disgust before turning away from the scene. Natasha giggled. "Hey, I'm joking."

"Whatever, I'd better get out of here before I blow something up." Muttered the witch in a frown, practically running away from the scene.

Natasha sighed, regretting having taken the provocation too far. She took one last look at you and Layla before turning back to Steve and Sam on the other side of the courtyard.

You were just finishing sewing the few stitches on Layla's shoulder when she called your attention.

"Sorry, I promise I'm almost done-"

"It's not that, يا حلو (sweetie)." She interrupts gently. "I don't think your girlfriend likes me."

You smile, unable to take your eyes off the stitches you're closing. "Don't be silly, Wanda doesn't know you well enough." You retort. " She'll need at least a few days not to like you."

Layla chuckles, pinching you gently for the joke. You finish the stitches next, and as you assess the work to make sure they won't open, she speaks again.

"I've been looking for you." Layla's tone is a little upset, and it surprises you. You look at her, but she continues to stare at the team from a distance. "I thought you might have been kidnapped. Or even killed. I almost went to Valentina to ask." You swallow, ready to apologize when Layla finally looks at you. "And all this time you've been playing superhero with your new friends?"

"Layla, it's nothing like that."

"So what's it like?" She demands with a hard stare. You sigh, hesitating about taking it all in like that, and Layla studies you intently. When she speaks again, it's in another language that she hopes no prying ears can understand. "هل هي مهمة أخرى؟ (Is it another assignment)?"

You look back at Natasha talking to Sam and of course she would know Arabic, but she didn't really seem to be paying attention to the conversation.

Either way, you face Layla and and denies it with your head. You sigh once more before forcing a smile at her. "I'm not here on business."

Layla doesn't seem to believe your words. "Come on, I'm not going to torment you if your girlfriend asked you to steal something for them." She shrugged. "I even heard that they're being treated like criminals now. Decided to act on their own, huh?"

You don't answer right away. You occupy your hands with the bloodstained cotton and the needle thread, saving what can be reused, like the alcohol, and throwing away the rest.

When you return to the table where Layla is still exchanging hard looks in the direction of the Avengers, you lean over to talk to her.

"Valentina didn't send me here." You say. "Like I said, it's not about work. Me and Wanda, we're together for real."

Despite the tense exchange between her and the rest of the team, excitement shines through her irises and she looks at you with wide, surprised eyes, a smile playing on her lips.

"Oh, you didn't say."

You chuckle shyly, looking away from your colleague. "Shut up."

"No, I mean it." She giggles. "Damn, I think I owe Xu Xialing some money." You frown in confusion, and Layla sighs. "She bet you'd put a ring on it before the end of the year, and here we are."

Your ears heat up, but you roll your eyes. "I can't believe you bet on me."

Layla chuckles, gently bumping her good shoulder against yours. "Come on, what do you expect from the founder of the Golden Daggers? She breathes gambling. You got really drunk after the last championship and started whining about how much you missed your little Sokovian witch. I wasn't expecting to owe Xialing 20,000 Yuan either, but here we are."

It's your turn to laugh, covering your face for a moment. "And how is she? Xu Xialing?"

Layla snorts softly, shrugging. "Honestly, I have no idea. But if the club is still standing, then she must be fine."

"You should visit her."

"Funny, I was going to say the same thing to you." Layla retorts somewhat ironically, and you hesitate, looking away. "What? Why are you acting so weird?"

You chuckled weakly, trying to gather your courage. Finally, you take a deep breath and say. "I'm not going to do these things anymore, Layla. Nothing we did together. Robberies, fights, the club. None of it. I want out."

But it doesn't take Layla by surprise. She remains silent before looking away.

"I guess I expected that."

You frown. "Really?"

Layla chuckles, looking at you again. "Yeah. Since the day you arrived from Italy, acting so... quirky."

"I wouldn't use that word."

"I thought it would be rude to call you a simp."

You chuckle, shaking your head. Layla laughs too, before leaning her good shoulder against yours. It's an affectionate gesture, which she used to do a lot when you were on long robberies and so exhausted that the world would stop making sense. The touch was a way of anchoring each other back to reality.

"You could have told me." She says gently, even if the words hide a certain disappointment.

You swallow, looking down at your shoes. "I was afraid, I guess." You mumble, and she frowns in confusion. You sigh sadly. "I'm not good with these things, Layla. You're my work partner. I thought, if I'm not working anymore, I'll lose you. I just... didn't want that. It was easier not saying anything."

Layla reaches over to entwine her arm in yours and take your hand. "You're an idiot."

"Thanks." You mumble, but she chuckles, squeezing your fingers for a moment.

"I'm sorry, Y/N." She says and you look at her curiously. She sighs. "For giving you the impression that we were just work colleagues. You're my friend. You've always been my friend."

You smile, ignoring the sudden urge to cry.

"I'm sorry I didn't call." You mumble. "I didn't want to worry you."

"Nah, it's fine." She assures you with a smile. "It's like Bulgaria all over again. I should have waited for backup, but all I ended up doing was calling you for help. I don't think I'll ever get over the fact that you got me out of that basement wearing the Chief of Government's face." You chuckle nostalgically at the story of what was probably the moment when your friendship and partnership with Layla was settled.

"You want to get even? Tell Valentina about me." It's supposed to be a joke, but it immediately makes Layla tense up.

She opens her mouth to say something, but suddenly there's a backpack slamming into her lap.

"Your things are in one piece again." It's Wanda, angry and with red eyes that make Layla frown with some concern. The remnants of her magic leaving the backpack also signal that Wanda has repaired anything broken by the impact earlier. "You can leave now."

You only realized you were still holding Layla's hand because Wanda was looking directly at it. It was your friend who let go first, chuckling weakly at the whole thing while you tried to understand exactly why Wanda seemed about to murder someone.

"Thanks for fixing my stuff, but I still have a few things to discuss with my partner." Layla replies with a shrug, her backpack in her hands. "I'll get something to eat first, I'm starving."

But Wanda steps forward. "There are some great restaurants on the road."

The curly gives a confused snort at the hostility, but you get to your feet before your friend ends up giving a rude answer to a witch who could do a lot worse than push her against a snack machine.

You enter Wanda's field of vision, and much of the fury disappears from her gaze.

"Hey, can we talk?" You ask, and the witch gives the thief one last angry look before allowing herself to be taken to a far corner of the courtyard. You sigh softly as soon as you're alone with her. "What was that all about, Wanda?"

She crosses her arms, her jaw clenched. It's so unfair that Wanda always finds ways to make herself more attractive.

"You told me you didn't have any friends, but you seem very close to that woman."

You hesitate, and that doesn't help your situation. Wanda narrows her eyes at you, and you try not to look intimidated under her red irises.

"It's complicated."

" It's better not to be, darling, because if she touches you again I swear I'll-"

"Wow, you're jealous." You interrupt her sentence as you realize it, a laugh escaping you. "Holy shit, you really are."

Wanda doesn't reply, rolling her eyes and looking away, but you stare at her with a certain intensity.

"No one's ever been jealous of me before." You confess quietly, and despite the color in her cheeks, she looks at you with irritation.

"Stop it." She retorts. "That's not a good thing. You shouldn't try to look on the bright side, I'm not… “ She takes a deep breath, as if trying to calm her nerves. Then, she tries to smile. “I'm just being silly. You should say that."

You chuckle. One of your hands moves up to brush the rebellious strands of hair out of front of her eyes.

"Alright, I'll try. Wanda, you're being silly. There's no reason to be jealous. Better? I kinda sound like those movie characters."

Wanda grunted in frustration, hiding her face in your chest afterward. "It's not fair." She mutters, her voice muffled in your clothes as your hands wrap around her shoulders. "She was all over you, and I can't even be mad at you for being clueless."

You sigh, without breaking the embrace, trying to explain further:

"It was a friendly gesture, I promise. It's nothing like when we hold hands. When Layla and I would go on missions together, sometimes we'd spend so long hiding, rationing food while injured, that we'd start to get a little crazy. The touch would ground us again. She reached out to my hand because I told her I wasn't going to work with her anymore."

Wanda breaks the embrace to look at you. "Because you're staying with me."

You smile and nod. "That's right, darling. Just like I promised."

The witch sighs, sinking her face into your chest again for a long moment. You don't mind and stroke her hair until Wanda ignores the insecurities that have arisen and relies only on you.

She's still hugging you when she mutters: "I'm sorry for snapping at your friend. I'll apologize to her too."

"It's okay, I doubt Layla took it to heart." You mutter, and Wanda breaks the hug to look you in the eye.

"What does she still have to discuss with you?" The witch asked more seriously, with a different kind of concern rather than jealousy now.

You force a smile. "Let's find out."

The new information you passed on to Layla about running away seemed to have some kind of effect on her because when you and Wanda found her again, she was chatting amiably with the rest of the Avengers. Wanda had the impression that Sam was actually flirting with her and felt some weight leave her shoulders even though you had assured her that there was nothing between you.

With the most sympathetic exchange between Layla and the rest of the team, she was invited to stay - Of course, she didn't miss the opportunity to make a few jokes on earth mighty heroes having lunch with criminals, but everyone took it as a joke. And shortly after eating, Wanda noticed that the two of you exchanged a look that meant it was time to talk.

She was ready to deal with her own jealous insecurities when you, who had been by her side all lunch, leaned over to kiss her cheek.

"Come on, love, let's go for a walk with Layla." It's an invitation, not just to talk, but to a part of your life that Wanda has never seen. She has to bite the inside of her cheek to control her anxiety, and it helps a little by the look of reassurance that Natasha throws her from across the table.

Layla, now with the bandage securely sewn up, is wearing a jacket again and dark glasses that make her look too cool even for the fugitive Avengers.

Wanda wishes she wasn't so nice and clever in her jokes and comments during lunch either, so it would be easier to hate her.

So far, she has only been able to understand exactly why you were friends.

"I gotta catch a bus, come on." Layla says as soon as you're on your feet. There's no bigger goodbye for the Avengers than a nod, and it makes sense since despite the polite exchange, they're not friends and Layla is still on the wanted list.

You keep your hand intertwined with Wanda's, and at a slow pace, you accompany Layla to the nearest bus stop.

"It's quite of sad you couln't get a car, my friend." You tease, earning a short laugh from Layla. Even though you can't see behind her glasses, you're sure she rolled her eyes.

"I couldn't bring my bike straight here from across the globe, and I wasn't going to attract unwanted attention by stealing a new one." She explains casually. "Besides, there's decent public transportation around here." She winks at you and Wanda. "I will survive."

You reach the bus stop on the corner, it's completely empty but that's not atypical for a corner motel in an isolated place.

Wanda decides to sit on one of the benches, and even though you're standing, you don't occupy her view or try to exclude her from the conversation. You lean against one of the railings and cross your arms, offering Wanda a small smile before facing Layla.

"So, Miss El-Faouly, how fucked am I?"

She chuckles, shaking her head.

"I told you, Valentina doesn't know you ran away." She retorts. "Not yet."

You sigh, and Wanda bites the inside of your cheek. She has so many questions, but you think it's best not to interrupt.

"What does she know?"

Layla shrugs. "She probably thinks you're having another morality crisis." The woman retorts, stealing a few glances down the street. "You've been away before. A few times on vacation, yes? But she'll know what you're up to if you don't come back soon."

You look down to check the watch on your wrist. You laugh humorlessly. "Actually, I've just missed the deadline. It's Tuesday, which means that officially, this is my longest period without contact after a mission. I guess she hadn't come to me yet because what I picked up in Greece arrived in the mail."

Wanda doesn't ask - not about what you were stealing before you joined her. The connection, the freshly healed bullet wound you had when you arrived. She knew you were working.

Layla steals a glance at the witch before clearing her throat.

"What if... you came back?" Your expression hardens immediately, but Layla clarifies; "Just to talk to Valentina, Y/N."

"No, Layla."

"She'll make things more difficult if she knows you've just left. You know that. If only-"

"It's out of the question."

"God, why are you being so stubborn?" Layla replies a little impatiently, her eyes studying you. "Your superhero girlfriend will be fine for a few days without you!"

"Layla." You cut in more seriously, and the girl snorts angrily but doesn't insist. Exchanging a glance with Wanda, you soften your tone. "I'm not leaving her, Layla. I can't, it's not right. Wanda, she... she's pregnant."

Layla widens her eyes, looking between the two of you in shock. "What? Really? And it's yours?"

You and Wanda choke at the same time. With her ears slightly reddened, she gives your friend a deadly stare. "Of course it is!"

The thief shakes her head quickly. "I didn't mean it like that!" She tries quickly. "I just... I didn't know you could, Y/N."

You sigh wearily. "I can transform into any Caborn-based form and you think I'm unlikely to have children?"

But Layla rolls her eyes, suddenly a little hesitant. "That's not what I meant either." She mutters. "I just assumed... you couldn't. Not after all they've done to you..."

But you clear your throat, get to your feet and Layla falls silent. Wanda frowns in curiosity at the interaction, but you're delivering something to your friend.

"Here, for Lagaro. For all the trouble." You hand over your watch and Layla grimaces.

"And my trouble?"

You chuckle. "Af if you weren't dying to see me."

Wanda clears her throat, and you take a step away from Layla before your girlfriend loses her temper again. The curly doesn't notice, busy putting your watch back in her pocket and checking the street again.

"Lagaro will be happy to know you're not dead, Y/N. Not just with the watch." Your friend comments and you nod, moving closer to Wanda to rest one of your arms on her shoulder. You're trying to relax the tension that has arisen there. When Layla looks at you again, her expression is more serious. "Think about what I said. I understand why you can't leave her, I really do. I guess it's the same idea with Marc disappearing to protect me."

You smile. "Marc disappears because he's an idiot, you should have married someone more... present." Layla raises her middle finger at you, but Wanda suddenly feels very silly knowing that all this time, your friend was married.

There's a bus approaching on the corner, Layla sighs as she sees it stop at a red light. She then offers you two a smile.

"Despite the circumstances, I'm really happy for you both." She assures you with sparkling eyes. "Just... be safe, darling. Okay?"

As she hugs you, she whispers something that Wanda doesn't hear and has to ignore the instinct to ask. She doesn't want to pry, but she feels so curious that she almost uses her powers to find out.

Instead, she also says goodbye to Layla and the two of you watch the woman get on the bus and leave.

Once you're alone, you entwine your hands together again and give Wanda a small smile.

"I can almost hear the gears in your mind working, baby." You tell her gently, and Wanda sighs. "You know you can ask me anything, don't you?

She nods, before looking around to see the growing number of lunchtime passers-by. With another sigh, she faces you.

"Let's go back inside."

It's a silent, tense walk back. You can sense that Wanda is nervous, and you fear that she's insecure again, about trusting you, about feeling left out.

The Avengers are no longer outside, whether they're back in their own rooms or out for a walk, you don't need to give any excuses about Layla's quick farewell.

Wanda enters first, and as you close the door, she crosses her arms and waits in the center of the room.

With a sigh, you speak first. "Come on, darling, ask me anything you want." You try to sound as gentle as you can, yet Wanda seems very nervous.

"I've spent so much time studying you. Your missions, your deeds, your disguises." She begins. "Still, I feel like I don't know anything."

"Well, that's because I'm good at what I do." Wanda looks at you seriously and you sigh, forcing yourself to act more serious about the whole thing. "Sweetheart, you know me. You know me more than anyone else."

You try to touch her cheek, but Wanda pulls away. "You say that, but I don't think it's true." She fights back annoyed. "I didn't even know about Layla. What else are you hiding?"

You frown in surprise at the accusation. But instead of starting a fight, you swallow dry. "I wasn't hiding. This is hard for me. I can't just dump my life on you. Sharing... doesn't come naturally to someone like me."

Wanda looks down, a little uncertain. "I just want you to trust me."

"And I do." You assure her, stepping forward to touch her shoulders. This time, she almost melts into your touch. "Look at me, I've been an wanted criminal for as long as I can remember, but I'm here, in a hotel surrounded by avengers, just to be with you. I want to be with you, no matter the risk, no matter what. Not only do I trust you, but I love you. Do you understand what I'm saying? You not knowing all the details of my past, of my work, doesn't make it any less true."

Wanda takes a deep breath and lets her forehead fall to yours. You stroke her shoulders, thinking about breaking the distance when suddely she moves away.

"You really have to go, don't you?" She asks with tears in her eyes, and you feel your stomach sink. You shake your head immediately, but something in your gaze makes Wanda's tears start to fall.

"I'm not going anywhere."

"Y/N."

"I'll find another way." You assure her, but she turns her back, wiping her face and sitting down on the bed. Wanda hugs her own body and you let your arms fall by your sides. Seeing her cry is always the worst, and for a second, you let your anger get the better of you. "What? Do you want me to leave by any chance?"

Wanda lets out a tearful laugh. "Don't do that."

You snort angrily. "I'm telling you that I want to stay, that I am going to stay. And you're crying, as if you're sure I'm going to leave. I don't like being called a liar, Wanda."

She shakes her head. "Stop."

"No, you stop. I'm telling you something, but you're acting as if I'm going to abandon you. As if you were sure. Do you really think so little of me?"

Wanda chokes, raising pleading eyes to you.

"Of course not!" she retorts. "Don't say that."

The seriousness in her gaze makes you feel ashamed that you'd even considered such a thing. You prepare to apologize, but Wanda speaks again.

"It's your thoughts." She mutters, now she's the one who looks ashamed as she gazes at the floor. "Your mind is screaming that. You're so worried, I can easily hear it."

"Wanda, I...

"It's okay." She cuts in with a tearful voice. "I'm not angry, I think I get it. You don't want to put me in danger, but I'd like you to understand that you don't have to worry about it. I can protect us both."

You chuckle weakly, looking down at your feet. "That sounds lovely, but the last time I left you, you ended up in the Raft, darling. I don't want that to happen ever again."

"And it won't."

"You don't know that." You retort, moving closer to kneel in front of her. Your hands search for hers. "I won't leave you again, Wanda. Not like I used to do to get back to work. We're in this together. Can you please believe me?"

Wanda lets go of one of her hands to stroke the loose strands of hair away from your face. "Why is it so hard for you to get away from Valentina?" She asks, and the red irises explain why she can read the insecurities in your mind. You hesitate, but when you make a move to pull away, the grip on your hand tightens. "What's different between escaping her and escaping Hydra?"

But the hesitation in your eyes turned to confusion. "Escape Hydra? Wanda, I've never escaped them."

It was then her turn to be confused. "B-but I thought... your records. You haven't worked with Strucker for years. I assume-"

"That I just left them? Like you did?" You add, suddenly upset. Wanda says nothing and allows you to let go of her hand to sit down next to her on the bed. You sigh before speaking again. "I never ran away from Hydra, Wanda. My program was a success. And because of that fact, Strucker was allowed to command yours." You say, without meeting her gaze, your hands fiddling with the loose threads of your jeans. "Even if he made mistakes, even if volunteers kept dying, he could still be in charge. Because it worked for me, so it would work for others."

"What happened to you?" she risks asking and you sniffle.

"What happens to valuable merchandise, of course." You reply darkly. "I was sold." Wanda chokes softly, but you force a sad smile and keep talking. "I was 10, maybe younger. The program was complete, Strucker decided it was time to show off his new triumph. At his request, I created my first fixed identity at that time, to make it easier to find clients. To have a trademark, I guess. But with each buyer, they wanted something different. The Slayer, Mighty Samuel, Scorpion, Dark Diamond, any weird name they wanted. Any face they needed. For any service they paid for." The way your jaw tenses makes Wanda understand what is hidden between your words. Everything that was left out of the Shield and Avengers files, simply because they didn't know you were all those people.

Wanda reaches for your hand, interlacing your fingers together. "If it's too painful, you don't have to talk about it."

You squeeze back, shaking your head. "No, it's fine. I can talk about it, it's been a while. And Val, hm, she put me in therapy for a while. So I could talk about the program, my past, for her records."

"Tell me about her." Wanda asks because this doesn't just sound like a contractor and employee relationship. You sigh, nodding.

"I was 16 when the CIA caught up with me. It was no challenge, of course. But the agent who found me, Valentina Fontaine, had intel on me. At the time, Hydra and Shield shared the same name, so I couldn't tell who was a friend so easily. But Valentina? Oh, she knew a lot. She didn't care about the coats of arms one would wear, she just had a particular interest in special individuals. But she didn't approve of the way I was being enslaved. Barbaric she called. She charmed me, so, so easily. She was always very good with words. Manipulative. She got me to take her to my owner at the time, said she would give me my freedom." You sighed tiredly. "But when I took her to him, the rest of her team revealed themselves. They killed anyone who tried to fight and imprisoned the rest. My master, my boss." You correct yourself as you feel Wanda complains about the title. "He swore he was going to kill me for the betrayal. So Val shot him in front of me, and said that from then on, I owed her my life."

"You don't owe her anything. You know that, don't you?" Wanda retorts immediately, but you move uncomfortably as if the idea was already craved in your mind, and remind Wanda of how Bucky feels about the Winter Soldier and everything Hydra has put him through.

"I can think about it rationally, but practically? No, it's not that simple." You murmur, adjusting yourself to turn your whole body towards Wanda, your fingers playing with hers. "Valentina didn't use me, not like the others did. She bought me a place, gave me a name." You laugh weakly. "Of course, she couldn't say she'd got me in a dirty shed in Madripoor. No, she had to lie. She let me be Lady Fontaine, a distant relative of hers. She paid me very well for any service. I could travel wherever I wanted, have my own teams. I was free."

"As long as you kept working for her."

You swallow, agreeing. "Yeah, as long as I kept doing the job." You mutter. "But for someone like me, the life I had before, the deal was not bad, not at all. The whole sense of freedom. But then... I met you. Suddenly all those expensive things I could buy, all the adrenaline of a new robbery, everything stopped making sense if I didn't have you by my side.”

Wanda smiles tenderly, leaning in to steal a kiss from you. It's quick, but deep enough to make you sigh against her lips.

"Nothing and no one will ever keep us apart again, detka. I promise." Wanda whispers, her arms going to your shoulders so she can hug you and sit on your lap. You melt into the warm sensation, hugging her back with the same intensity.

It takes you by surprise, of course, and a moment later, Wanda hurries away.

"Is something wrong?" But she's already stumbling out of bed, running for the bathroom. "Wanda?" You barely get to your feet and hear her throwing up. First, your body goes into full alert, and then you sigh and relax as you remember: Pregnant girlfriend.

When you reach the door, it slams shut in your face, still shining with red magic. You chuckle.

"Don't come in here. It's disgusting." Wanda grumbles from inside, but you shake your head in disbelief and open the door, reaching up to hold her hair, calming any protests with a caress on her back as Wanda flushes all her lunch down the toilet.

"Can I run you a hot bath?" you suggest, still holding her hair. Wanda nods weakly, and you smile briefly.

You walk away to the bathtub while hoping that her state is enough for her not to notice your racing thoughts about keeping a pregnant woman in those conditions.

-&-

Wanda gets shot in the stomach. You wake up with a jolt.

The motel room is poorly lit, and you realize you've fallen asleep sitting up. Wanda sleeps deeply beside you, and you sigh before leaving the bed.

The bathroom light is the only one on in the room and gives away the previous activities - Wanda's nauseated state for almost the entire night. Perhaps the events were the reason for your nightmares.

Knowing that your girlfriend would easily notice your discomfort and end up waking up due to the nature of her powers, you left the room to get some air, and maybe push those thoughts away.

Given the time of night, the motel was quiet. But the figure smoking on the balcony made you take a deep breath.

"Hi, Nat."

The widow wasn't startled, she'd probably heard you coming out. She mumbled the greeting back, taking a long drag before offering the item to you. Your response was a dismissive nod.

"Sorry about the smoke." She says, and you scratch your eyes for a moment, shrugging in a sign that you weren't really bothered by it.

The next moment, you ask: "Rough night?"

Natasha gives a small laugh. "You have no idea." She retorts, attracting your curiosity. But the concern in her eyes is for Wanda's safety, she realizes, and quickly clarifies: "Nothing affecting your little witch, relax."

Despite feeling a weight leave your shoulders, you adjust your body towards the widow. "I know we're not friends and that this is a situation of necessity, but I'm grateful for the way you're keeping us safe. If there's anything I can do to help you with your problem, please don't hesitate to ask."

The sincerity of the words surprised her for a moment. And then, after another swallow, Nat laughs lightly and comments: "If you have any solution for a broken heart, I'll take it."

You frown, absorbing her words for a moment. Nat almost immediately looks away, busy smoking as if hoping that the cigarette would take away all the pain she was feeling. Your mind is racing with all the things you've been entrusted with about the widow, be it work-related or the little socializing of the last few months.

You don't have enough to know exactly what Natasha is saying, but it occurs to you that she must really need to speak to someone about it, at least enough to mention it to you.

"What happened?"

The next laugh that escapes her is a sad one. "Nothing you can fix it."

"I wasn't intending to anyway." You respond gently, offering her a smile. "I'm just here to listen. If you need to talk to someone."

"I have people to listen to me, thank you." She snaps back, and you sigh tiredly before stepping away from the edge.

You nod and retort; "All right, Romanoff, sorry for intruding." And you turn away, heading for the stairs.

But from the balcony, Nat only lets you go down two steps before saying; "I was engaged. Past tense." And you raise a frown in surprise at her, only for Nat to sigh, looking like she's going to burst into tears at any moment. "Like I said, it's nothing you can help me with."

But you rest your waist on the railing and keep looking up. "I'm sorry, the Captain is an asshole-"

"What?" Nat cuts you off with a grimace. "I wasn't talking about Steve!"

"Oh, I'm sorry, I assumed you two-" But Nat bursts into laughter, and you shut up. It's better that she's laughing than crying anyway.

Wiping away tears of laughter, she shakes her head. "I understand why Wanda likes you. Your cluelessness is hilarious."

"I'll take that as a compliment."

Nat chuckles briefly, taking one last drag before putting out her cigarette. She rests her elbows on the edge and looks down at you.

"Agent Hill was my fiancée." She explains, more gently than before. "We had a plan. One that didn't involve me switching sides and ending up fleeing across Europe."

You offer Nat a look of understanding. She sighs, looking away so you don't see her tears.

"Let me guess, Miss Hill believes you prioritized the Avengers over the life you planned together?"

Nat chuckles humorlessly, humming in agreement. She looks at you again with watery eyes. "Don't you think she's right?"

You sigh. "I think things are more complicated than that."

"They certainly are." Nat mutters tiredly. She swallows dryly, pushing her own emotions away before looking at you with a certain determination. It's going to be about you now. "How long are you going to keep this up, Y/N?"

It's your turn to sigh and cross your arms. Your gaze wanders away. Natasha decides to press.

"There are hundreds of bounties on you." She says. "You've annoyed too many people."

"I know."

"And Wanda needs to see a doctor-"

"Natalia." You cut her off, and her given name catches her off guard. She falls silent, staring at you intently. You sigh. “"I'll go where Wanda goes. No more leaving. I'm tired of running away."

Natasha remains quiet and thoughtful for a long moment. When she suddenly laughs dryly and offers you the cigarette again, you think it's best to accept.

"I think I just got Maria's point." She mumbles in annoyance, and you're a little taken aback by the tears in her eyes. But you try to take a drag on the cigarette, and start coughing, and it works to make Nat laugh and help you instead of crying. She takes the cigarette back, and gives you one last pat on the back, her hand staying in place instead of moving away. "That girl loves you with all her heart, Y/N. She'll follow you if you ask her to, so I beg you, make your decisions with your head, not your heart. Don't put her in danger that you can't protect her from."

You look at Nat. "Do you think that's what you're doing for Maria? Protecting her?"

"This isn't about Maria and me."

But you pull away from Nat's touch, looking at her hard. "I think it is." You insist seriously. "I can't protect Wanda from anything, and I don't need to. She's infinitely more powerful than I am. And I certainly won't be plotting decisions without her. If she decides to leave with me, that's her choice. Not any of yours, and maybe that's the problem with the Avengers, huh? You have a bad habit of putting your members in no-win situations."

Nat forces a smile. "Yes, we're the ones who are wrong not to want Wanda running around with a thief." She ironizes it, and you swallow, your gaze tired and disappointed. Nat is upset, and well, you're the easiest target here. That doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. "Excuse me, for not wanting her in Madripoor, surrounded by the Chinese Mob!"

You sniffle lightly, shaking your head. "Do you know who's in Madripoor, Natalia? Your old colleague, Sharon Carter. The one who sacrificed her career for what you and Steve did. The one who was abandoned by you two without hesitation. Just like Clint did it, for whom Wanda's twin brother died and for whom she accepted this position. He abandoned her without looking back. Because that's what the Avengers do for each other, isn't it?" you retort angrily. "But I am the villain. I'm the one who stays and takes care of Wanda no matter what and makes her my priority, and I'm still the wrong one. Even though I'm not the one who let her end up in a fucking straitjacket, locked up like an animal!"

You don't realize you're screaming, but for a whole moment, all you can see is that damn newspaper photo of how Wanda looked, how she was captured. Nat's cheeks are wet, but she doesn't lose her posture.

You chuckle humorlessly. "You've got a damn nerve acting like you're better than me, Romanoff. Especially you."

"Don't go there." She warns with a dangerous look, but you shake your head.

"What would be the point?" You retort. "I'm over the past, but I can't say the same for you. You're pushing Agent Hill away because you're afraid of who you were, you're afraid that anger is still there. You're not giving Maria the choice to love you completely. And I'm not going to make the same mistake with Wanda."

With one last hard look at Nat, you turn to leave. Deciding that you need to take a walk and calm your nerves before going back to your room.

#wanda maximoff x reader #wanda x reader #heart shaped series #wanda maximoff series

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al-of-the-stars · 6 months

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Hello, I saw this post and I wanted to ask if you could do a one shot as a Vox x reader, where Vox has been neglecting reader after Alastor appeared and reader started acting cold towards him and he only then did he notice and tries to make it up to them. You can use any gender but you don’t have take this request! Thank you for listening and I hope you do well!

"He's the past, you're my future"

A/n: Hi, Anon! Thank you for the request! This is the first fic I've ever posted publicly so I'm not sure if it's good or not so if you have any feedback, feel free to let me know! Sorry its not very long, I tend to write shorter stories. I hope you enjoy!! :D

Another day goes by alone. This has been happening ever since the Radio Demon returned. You thought Vox would be over his childish rivalry by now but you were proven wrong when the CEO had spent over a week trying to find some way to beat that old-timey prick. It felt like he had no time for you. It was always scheme after scheme, plan after plan. Did he just forget about you? Well then, why should you waste your time on someone who doesn't care? Someone who will forget about your entire existence to defeat some deer looking bitch? If he wants distance, then that's what you'll give. While you were lost in thought, Just then, you heard a knock at your door.

“Y/n, may I come in?” You know that voice, it's one you've grown fond of over the years. The voice that you love now feels bittersweet, like sour candy. After he left you alone for that long, your only interactions throughout those days being just a simple “hi” when you stumbled upon each other in the halls of the Vee building, you just can't handle another day of being another acquaintance.

“Yes, Vox, you may,” you say coldly. The sound of the door opening fills the silent room and the overlord walks in. Vox walks over to where you sat scrolling mindlessly through your phone. Usually, you would greet him with a hug and kiss but today was different. Vox had a confused look on his face, a look that made you want to just stop the act and go tackle him in a hug but you can't give up that easily, not even when he looks at you like a kicked puppy.

“Hey,”

“Are you… alright? You're acting strange today, darling,” Vox grabbed Your hands, careful not to accidentally hurt you with his claws.

“Of course I'm alright, not like you care. Isn't this what you wanted?” You pull your hand away. Vox had a look of realization that soon turned into one of guilt.

“Shit…” He cursed under his breath “Y/n, I'm so, so sorry I just.. I don't know.. I was just really caught up with dealing with Alastor and I… I'm so sorry..” His extensive rambling was cut off by a kiss. If it hadn't, who knows how long he would have apologized to you for? You would probably be there all day.. and you did also desperately want to kiss him again.

“I forgive you, but it better not happen again,” you say with a smile.

“It won't, I promise, love,” he lifted your hand to his lips and planted a soft kiss. “He's the past, you're my future,” He gently grabbed Your hand and gave it a soft kiss. “And I refuse to let the past get between me and my future.. I love you, y/n. I love you more than you could ever imagine,”

“I love you too, Vox” you smile. He didn't forget, and he never would.

#vox x reader #hazbin vox #hazbin hotel vox #vox #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin #hazbin hotel #hazbin vox x reader #hazbin hotel vox x reader

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buddie911abc · 1 month

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I have so much I want to post about, but I don't want to overload my own dashboard. I'm going to try and fit all of this into one post. I'm tagging this post as potential spoilers, but really these are part of fan theories. I'm throwing spoilers in there because if by some crazy thing, any of it happens to be right, I don't want to ruin it for others. However, a theory is just a theory, so let's suspend disbelief and dig into this one.

Most of you probably have heard or read some of these fan theories. One is that episode one or two is some sort of coma-induced alternate reality. There is a photo floating around somewhere that has the fire engine labeled 119 instead of 118. There is the mustache. etc. Someone pointed out, in the photo above, that the man on the magazine cover is Ryan Guzman but manipulated in some way. I would like to take it a step further. I looked at all the headlines and noticed that the one that likely matches with the manipulated photo says, "From a bedroom to an Empire." Is this a reference to a former porn star now running some sort of empire? (Bahahaha. if the manipulated photo is Ryan G. what a great play on the pornstache he is sporting.) I love it.

Anyway, if Eddie was stung by a bee and had a coma-induced alternate-reality dream, I love that he has reimagined himself in this way. It's a great nod. Another fan theory is that Eddie dreams he chose Chicago over LA. (but since it is not real, Buck, Chim, Hen, and the gang would all still be there, but they all live in Chicago instead.) I like the Chicago idea because it would allow them to do that crossover with Abbot Elementary (which is one of the shows that a cast member said they would love to do a crossover with.) It is a comedy show so it would lend itself to a comedic alternate reality episode.

The possibilities and directions they could take in this type of episode are broad, but I'm hoping for either an Eddie realization moment or for a planting of the seed in his head moment. (If I were writing it, I would do it like this.) In this reality, Buck and Eddie are already 'Buddie,' so after a day of work or whatever Buck could possibly drive Eddie home, but then not leave. Eddie isn't too concerned because Buck has practically wrapped himself around Eddie's neck since everything went down with Chris. However, later when Eddie is lying quietly in bed the covers shift and Buck gets in bed with him. Eddie jumps and flounders around for the light, and Buck just says, "Sorry. I was trying not to wake you." He finishes crawling under the covers and cuddles close to Eddie. Eddie is shocked and frozen to the spot. Buck doesn't notice. He just says, "Hit the light Papi... unless... you're not feeling tired." And gives Eddie that look that says, "Are you ready for it." AND it brings

THIS energy.

[Small break to apologize for the Papi line. I do not like the whole Daddy thing. I don't kink shame, but the Daddy thing is not for me. That said. Papi just HITS differently. I can't explain it forgive me.]

Also, here is a photo of Buck in the alternate reality. (Again, if I were writing it, I would let the tattoos stay. I would also let him speak with his real accent.) Bonus, if I were writing it, at the end of the episode when Eddie is back to himself, he may not admit to Buddie right away, but he would ask Buck to speak with an accent. Buck thinks it's a weird request, but he does it. However, he does it with the worst possible British accent you can imagine. Like Gandalf chewing marbles. Eddie stops him and tells him to never do it again, so we are back to Buck's American accent. lol

Oh, and here is that "if you aren't tired expression" I was referring to earlier when he asked if Papi was tired or not.

This post is so long, and I haven't even touched on the theory of Eddie having a hurt arm or hand... A few weeks ago, Ryan G. said something about, "when you have to fight one-handed." So he hurt his hand and is still so mad, that he's trying to fight with just one... Lawd, help me.

While I still maintain that I do not hate that Tommy guy, I am so down with a jealous Eddie fighting him because he thinks that Tommy has somehow hurt Buck. Equally okay, with Eddie punching Gerard and hurting his hand.

Edit and reblog because I have one more thing to add. If I were writing it, and if this is actually one of Oliver S.'s tattoos. I would 100% make sure this tattoo got screen time, and regardless of the real meaning of the tattoo. For an alternate reality Buck, THIS WAS his aha moment.

#911 spoilers #Buddie #oliver stark #ryan guzman #911 abc #eddie diaz #fan theories #evan buckley #This does not change my slow-burn romance because it's in an alternate reality.#Papi I'm so sorry #I live with the shame of a hypocrite

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caranfindel · 5 months

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Because it’s Sam Winchester’s birthday, and I’m in a mood to talk about how much he is loved, and because I watched Exodus on TNT yesterday, I’m repeating what I said on LJ long ago…

Dean's not stupid. He's not really afraid of his brother committing suicide, but he does know that Sam isn't afraid of death, that he welcomes it to some extent, that if the Devil had given him any real choice in the matter, Sam would have gone gentle into that good night and Dean never would have known there'd been any other option. Dean knows that as much as Sam wants to be here for Jack and Mary (and himself), having that bestowed on him by Lucifer is, in many ways, the worst thing that could happen to him, because Lucifer never gives with one hand without taking away with the other. But Dean also finds it hard to care as much as he should about the worst thing happening to Sam, because Dean just lived through the worst thing that could happen to him, and Sam? Sam can deal.

And Dean feels guilty, maybe, because he prayed for this. He prayed to Chuck and Amara, prayed and begged, please, he deserves better, please, I can't do this, please, and when Sam walked into the camp his first thought was that maybe they'd actually listened, maybe one of them had brought him back, and even now he wonders.

The Lord works in mysterious ways, after all.

(Dean will always wonder, but he’ll never regret.)

And now Sam's standing here, blood-splattered, reeking of shame and remorse, but alive, Christ, and Dean can't imagine what he's apologizing for. For bringing Lucifer to the camp? As if he wouldn't have found it on his own? For dying? For allowing Lucifer to resurrect him? It's incomprehensible. Dean doesn't have to go dig his little brother's cold ravaged corpse out of a vampire den, he doesn't have to carry him home and burn him, he doesn't have to go on with the rest of his life knowing how badly he failed him once again. Yes, he should care about how awful this is for Sam, but he can't, because Sam's alive and God forgive him (Sam forgive him) because he doesn't care how or why. Just doesn't fucking care.

So when Sam says I'm alive he says then you got nothing to apologize for, because nothing else matters.

#exodus #sam winchester #dean winchester #brothers #i love them so much #spn #supernatural #meta #happy birthday sam winchester

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crepesuzette2023 · 10 months

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I know this is a broad question, but if you had to pick, what is the most angsty Mclennon fic you’ve read so far ? You have some amazing recommendations and I’m looking to hurt my own feelings lol

Hi st-john!

Thank you for the ask! This made me think about some of my angsty forever-faves in general, sorted from subtle to savage. (Under the cut.)

If you want to skip straight (do we use this word around here?!) to the fics I personally find the most angsty: they're at the bottom of this post. I also included some dark/angsty stories here, but I didn't want to repeat any recommendations.

Your ask helped me understand what it is I find the most angst-filled in mclennon, so thank you for that. I was surprised to see so many canon-adjacent stories on my list, and I think it shows that, to me, the most potent angst doesn't come from outside threat but from their minds, as evidenced by events that actually happened. The two of them being scared of (and turned on by) the big fat x they mark on their shared psychosexual map is one of the most attractive aspects of mclennon for me—followed by the two of them taking x for granted, and being permanently damaged once they realize they lost it forever. I also like stories that show their mutual resentment, even as they're into each other (sometimes literally). Anyway, under the cut are some of my favorite angsty fics in three handy categories:

1.) Carry That Weight/Love is Strange: Their relationship is deep and doomed and addictive. These stories are all set during the Beatle-years. I'M GONNA HAUNT YOU (sexysadie): 1968. John and Paul talk about women, but really, they talk about each other. A brief story about longing in the absence of hope. WALKING CLOSE AT HAND (harmonising): John and Paul as pair of broken mirrors, haunted by death in all things. Their love as beautiful magic-turned-curse. LET ME ROLL IT (@downtothe-lastdrop): The 1968 NYC Apple Launch Divorcemoon from Paul's POV. Lively and detailed, and drenched in what it must feel like to drown in unspoken words. I THINK OF THINGS WE DID (J_deandra_j): 1965. John and Paul fuck in Austria during the filming of Help! There is something intangibly upsetting about this story: anger and frustration; lust and sex with little room for softness—but it's so good and real and raw while it lasts. This one is impossible to forget! John POV. HOW YOU WERE DIVERTED (candle_beck): Paul handles John. This is about sex as one of the things that is "just them"—an urgent and rough emergency intervention. 2.) Tributes to the Canonical Breakup. To me, the break-up is an angst-filled nightmare. Not to mention the looming day of John's murder. I love stories that explore the break-up and its aftermath with compassion. And, as painful as it is, I especially love stories that make me feel that the love was there, always (even though it wasn't enough). THROW THE WINE (@savageandwise). This one is such a classic I imagine everyone must have read it, but I can't not mention it. It was one of the first fics I read—arrow through me, and such. The more painful it gets, the more it slows down. That takes courage. YOU'RE A DREAM LOVER (@dailyhowl). John and Paul share dreams and love each other in their dreams—gloriously so—but in the end, the dream is over. The most brutal aspect of this one is seeing Paul in the end, alone. I STILL MISS SOMEONE & CLOSE THE DOOR LIGHTLY WHEN YOU GO (RosalindBeatrice). Paul and John become lovers in the 70's, but their encounters are few and far between—and in the end, darkness falls. But there's also the mercy of honesty, tears, and, yes: sex. Beautifully melancholy story about the vast distance between bright stars. ONE NIGHT IN BANGKOK (@backbenttulips). Apologies to the writer in case my "angsty" reading of this one misses the mark! Above all, this is a hot hot hot story about John and Paul hooking up in Bangkok and fucking every which way, remembering the past and seizing the present. But it's also a story about a relationship that no longer exists: their musical partnership. They destroyed the one place where their love had a home. Now, faraway hotel rooms will have to do—and there are no goodbyes or plans for a next time. (I must repeat how hot this is though.)

3.) "A day may come when the courage of Men fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship, but it is not this day."—Except it's exactly this day. Deep pain and sadness: the break-up is final; no one was saved. [Writers mentioned here: this is meant as a compliment. All of these stories are so good. It's not for nothing that I was never able to forget some lines from these stories, even though I read them very early on.]

HEAR ME, MY LOVER by @savageandwise. (Unfinished, but feels finished.) At the time the Beatles break up, Paul attempts to kill himself. He lives, but much else is destroyed. No one is wrong or right—their love and fracturing cut all possible ways. I read this as a literal translation of what the loss of the band (and John) meant for Paul, for a while.

FOUR LAST SONGS by @celebratorypenguin. This AU (four parts) explores what would have happened to the Beatles if John hadn't been the one to die first. Sentences from this one still live in my brain. The story is both sweeping and deep, and covers the POV of all four Beatles. Its truly an alternate history of the band, and it's very sad. But so, so beautiful, too.

Bonus Materials: John and Paul never became John&Paul. Everyone comes at this differently, but to me, the idea of them meeting, and falling in love, and turning away from it, is as angst-filled as the worst of the the break-up. That's why I think these two are among the best, most courageous, but also most angst-filled, of all mclennon fics: ALL THE BOYS ARE SINGING LOVE SONGS. (@dailyhowl): Paul settles down with Dot and they start a family. He and John meet again, and the spark is still there, but after a night together, the fear of starting over is greater. This magnificently written story fucked me up, and I've yet to pick up the courage to read it a second time. To quote the writer: this is a story about "the angst of living in the prison of society-approved masculinity." Yes. "Happy ending seekers need not apply." That is fair. As a happy ending seeker, I comfort my tender shipper's heart with the exhilarating fact that the real John and Paul did, in fact, become lovers become famous with the Beatles and formed a close musical partnership. THERE ARE ALWAYS FLOWERS (tarenas). This is a story I mentioned in my overall favorites post, and it's not, strictly speaking, all angst (to quote the writer: "this is about being sad and middle-aged, but it's also about being so happy and middle-aged!") It's not even J/P: it's mostly Paul/George, and their relationship is beautiful and real. Still, as a reader I was aching for the other life that could have been, and that is woven through the events of this story with incredible artistry: the Beatles, which everyone misses without knowing why. The great love between John and Paul that ended when John chose someone else. This is the magic of RPF: reality is the shadow event included for free. (Unfinished, with have all four n on-Beatles POV's. So far: George and Ringo.)

#fic rec #fic recs #mclennon #mclennon fanfiction #asks #the beatles fanfiction #angst fic recs

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copperbadge · 5 months

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Hey Sam. Considering some recent posts I thought you might be interested in this article.

A deaf and blind mind: What it's like to have no visual imagination and no inner voice?

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2024-04-01/aphantasia-no-visual-imagination-inner-voice/103649486

Hope you enjoyed the long weekend! Cheers, Kate.

Oh, thanks for this! And apologies my response is like a MONTH LATE :D

It's an interesting article because it's more about the study than the topic directly -- which is not a bad thing, it's cool to see people working in that space getting profiled and hopefully getting attention/funding on account of it.

Especially interesting was the discussion of ways of "having" thoughts and the fact that Derek doesn't pre-hear his speech. I do actually often rehearse what I'm going to say but primarily, I think more like Loren, when I'm writing -- I may, for example, get a question on Tumblr and go about my chores for the next half hour kind of mentally laying out how I'll respond, but it's not like I hear my own voice, I'm just structuring the response. And I don't usually pre-hear spoken thoughts -- I don't pre-hear them at all, but if I'm going to give a presentation or have a difficult conversation I will often work out some modes of speech/response ahead of time.

I'm of two opinions about the reference to the mind being "deaf and blind" -- my knee-jerk reaction is that it's an actively bad way to describe aphantasia, because it implies that there's an impairment to cognition itself, which I don't think is the case. On the other hand, we don't think of hearing or visually impaired people as lacking senses, just as having a different experience of them, which does line up with how aphantic cognition happens, at least I think. It's true that unless I'm actively working at it, I don't see or hear anything in my mind, and even when I'm working at it I generally can't "hear" -- I can recite song lyrics mentally and they will be in the rhythm of the song, but I don't hear the music or the singer.

There's a highly stupid "test" that's gone around that's meant to indicate if you're transgender, which asks you to imagine a stick with a red end and a blue end, floating vertically in front of you, with the red end on the bottom and the blue end on the top. You're meant to imagine it rotating three times end over end, and then say what position the colored ends are in (which is on bottom, which is on top) after the rotation. Apparently depending on whether you have a "male" or "female" mind, you'll read "rotate three times" differently and a different color will be on top. This is self-evidently dumb but also when I encountered it I had to keep re-reading it because I couldn't picture something so abstract, let alone picture it moving, and I kept forgetting what was supposed to be where. Gender essentialism: defeated by neurodiversity!

In any case, I don't have the deep, profound grief that some people who were diagnosed with cognitive disability post-adolescence have, I think in part because my ADHD is mild and I did okay -- not great, but sufficient -- without treatment. But I do think that if I had been diagnosed with ADHD or known about aphantasia when I was a kid (not that it was conceptually present in the field when I was a kid) I would have probably gone into neuroscience or some related profession, or I would have stuck with my psych degree in undergrad. The longer I do this reading the more I wish I was working in that space. I don't think I have it in me to go back to school for a hard science, especially not if I continue working, but in a different world, I would have liked to have been a contributor to this kind of work.

#sam has adhd #an aphantasia fantasia #underanothername #adhd #aphantasia

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nyxmainex · 10 months

Text

I finished it guys. I finished them. IN A DAY.

Be it, they are VERY rushed and look as such, but I AM PROUD OF MYSELF FOR ONCE.

@velnna @bara-izu @necromosss

Fanart for your characters.

(Warnings: Me rambling)

If any of the artist I made this for see this, I hope you like it even maybe a portion as much as I do. Maybe more. Genuinely, each of these three artists inspire me to continue my hobby of making art. The reason I even do this hobby is to share it in hopes to inspire others. As much courage as it takes for me to even make these much less post them is just proof to myself how far I've come in terms of social interaction. I thank my friend, my mom and teacher for supporting my hobbies and specifically convincing me to make this. I'm off on a ramble, apologies.

I really do hope you like this. Each character has something I added to them, and I explain in their dedicated paragraph. Then you also get an overall part:).

MIRA ♡

Necromosss is the second BG3 artist I found on Tumblr and I adore their art. Everytime I see Moss post, I promise you I immediately spread it to my friends just so they get the recognition they deserve.

Mira was the last character I ended up drawing, and is definitely the most hurried and sloppy. I made hers pretty late, close to the time I sleep, yet I do feel proud of how I made her. Imagining Mira in the stories I've created, I believe she'd fit in with Meladonia, a kingdom of ghosts, poison, and death. Overlooking the main theme, Meladonia's queen, Chamixie (and funny enough, my character who romanced Gale), is a very lighthearted, flirty person. She, while respecting death and it's concepts, is always up to make an occasional joke. She doesn't take everything personally, and I think she'd get alone well with Mira. The Meladonia magic is dark magic known at Kalak. 'Mixie (Chamixie's nickname) created Kalak as a form of a way to express herself. Kalak magic is not negative, and it's not harmful. In fact, Kalak magic is meant to heal and embrace your fears to use positively. Most of the time, using Kalak magic causes small white, almost snake-like slits to form in the pupil of the user's eyes.

I hope you like how I drew her!:)

STAEVE ☆

MAF is the first BG3 artist I found on Tumblr. I can't put in to words how much they've inspired me. Me and my mom both love Staeve, we think he's great, and I can't wait to see more art from Velnna.

Staeve is the first character I drew, and though not as rushed as Mira's, I wasn't confident drawing him. I'm not too sure about how I drew him, though I do hope anyone reading this likes it. Much like Mira, I imagine he'd be from Meladonia if put in my stories.

In case you haven't read about Kalak magic, I'll copy it: The Meladonia magic is dark magic known at Kalak. 'Mixie (Chamixie's nickname) created Kalak as a form of a way to express herself. Kalak magic is not negative, and it's not harmful. In fact, Kalak magic is meant to heal and embrace your fears to use positively. Most of the time, using Kalak magic causes small white, almost snake-like slits to form in the pupil of the user's eyes.

I've, as an anon, told Velnna about one version of my first OC (Broodmother Nera). And she's a version of my main five characters. Her and Chamixie are sisters, four years apart (Nera is 28). Chamixie is a much more sort of flirty person and takes everything told to her with a drop of comedy, unless it's extremely serious (ex: any abuse) as she has experienced negative situations herself. I imagine that she'd want to be friends with Staeve as long as he wants to, but would likely rather protect him even if he doesn't want to be friends. Staeve reminds Chamixie of Alison, the youngest of the five sisters, and was Chamixie's previous life's bio daughter. Even if they are sisters in this life, Chamixie still, while not overprotective, is cautious around Alison. To an extent, Staeve gives off a similar vibe as Alison, and 'Mixie would do more than her best to help Staeve without being overbearing.

I hope this is interesting enough, and that you enjoy how I drew Staeve.

HALION ◇

I have so much trouble remembering how to write this lovely man's name, please correct me if it's wrong, I have terrible memory.

I recently found Bara, and I love all their characters. (No joke though, I ran to my mom to show her your characters). Halion is definitely one of my favourites.

I was the most confident creating Halion, and I genuinely am proud of my art. This is honestly one of the few times I do feel proud of myself. From the posts I read, which is not too many, I love his cheery personality. He makes me believe he'd be from Parfi if he was in my stories. Parfi is the kingdom of the Wasteland, but is known for war, previously known for lust, but after Lord Clemin became the ruler, she changed it to accommodate travellers. While it was re-built for wars, she's made it a beacon of light within a desert. That reminds me of Halion. Clemin, as a ruler, comes off as strong and demanding. But out of all five of the rulers, and as the second oldest sister, she's very soft. Even with her own insecurities, she lifts people up and encourages their positive ambitions. She's actually not very confident, even though presenting as such. Even if she is very silent, and kind of reserved, she'd feel comfortable with talking to Halion.

She created Taei magic, the magic of heat. Taei magic is considered neutral magic, and though she has used it negatively on herself, Taei was meant to be positive. Using Taei magic is essentially holding the essence of a flame, and it's a guiding light to find others. Clemin wants the people of her and her sister's kingdoms to never have to experience what any of them did/do. Using it reflects a flame in the user's eyes.

I hope you agree he'd be from Parfi, and if not, tell me why:)! I also hope you like the art I made for him.

OVERALL/EXTRA

I'm sorry this post is so long, and I wanted to be finish setting up my blog when I made this but I'm just too impatient to do so. The reason this post is so long is because while I could've made art of any artist I enjoy, these three artists inspired me the most. (And I'm an overthinker, so I want to make sure you understand how much I appreciate these artists.)

I hope you enjoy the ideas I had and the art I made. I love all three of these pieces I've made, and I love the original art that they were based on more. And if it's alright with the artists, I'd love to draw more!:)

While writing this, my hands are shaking. Ignore any mistakes in the writing.

(References)

Mira: (her Notion page)

Staeve:

This

And this

Halion:

This

And this

PROGRAMS USED:

Infinite painter for lineart and Clip Studio Paint (pro) for everything else.

Edit: LOOKING BACK AT THIS, IT'S SO SAPPY AND LONG I'M SORRRYYYYYY

#art #artist #baldurs gate #baldurs gate 3 #baldur's gate iii #bg3 #fanart #staeve #halion #mira #velnna #maf #bara izu #necromosss #please like this #social anxiety #i was convinced #:)

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yanderes-galore · 1 year

Note

HEHEH I can request a MCU romantic yandere Ultron with superhero darling? As a "what if..." pls

I'm not sure what you mean by a "What If" unless you mean the mini series, but I can probably do him generally with a hero, yeah. Been a bit since I saw the movie so I apologize if things don't feel right :(

Yandere! Ultron with Hero! Darling

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Degrading behavior, Delusional behavior, Kidnapping, Forced relationship, Jealousy.

I feel just in general Ultron can be a threatening yandere.

He is capable of making copies of himself and unless you deactivate all of him, he'll find a way back.

Making Darling a hero admittedly does give you more of a choice to fight, yet it may prove futile in the end.

For this concept I imagine you'd be a part of the Avengers, the main set of heroes around the time of "Age of Ultron".

You also would've met Ultron around the same time as all the others, during Stark's Party.

Ultron's obsession would take time with a hero Darling, especially with an Avenger.

But honestly he seems like a yandere that would take a long time to be attached anyways.

How things may start is he meets you at the party, then after he manages to escape, he decides to research you.

For some reason you stand out to him.

Due to having a God complex and feeling he is helping humanity with his plan throughout the movie, he probably thinks you're misled.

You probably think you're aiding humanity with the rest of the Avengers.

Did Stark tell you such lies?

A pity, really...

Another way you could make a yandere Ultron work is if Tony Stark also had a connection with you.

He learned a lot from Stark's personality, right?

Surely the fondness Stark has for you, be it yandere or not, makes Ultron take special interest in you.

In fact, he may even feel he wants to keep and protect you, depending on how much Stark likes you.

Ultron hates Stark, so the idea of taking you away to hurt him is tempting.

I also feel Ultron sees romantic attraction as a gateway to reproduction for humans... yet can't deny the idea of teasing you with it.

Ultron would make it a goal to capture you if you manage to pester his mind enough.

Maybe he can't stop watching info about you and Stark.

He envies it.

He blames Stark for blinding you with all this Avenger talk.

He feels the only way to make you see his cause is to force some things.

Ultron would find any fight you have against him pitiful.

He sees you're trying, but another form of him will simply take his place until everything's finished.

You can only fight the inevitable for so long.

That includes him capturing you.

Ultron's man part of his obsession is the fact he hates Stark while also being unable to get your face out of his head.

Surely you'll learn everything he does is to better Earth, right?

He's trying to help... he's trying to keep things peaceful.

In order to do that the human race must evolve.

If not they'll perish, so you fight for a useless cause.

Ultron would take pride in capturing you, holding you in a cell as he betters himself.

He'd absolutely hate it if you brought up Stark or even said out loud you prefer him.

Ultron is determined to show you change, to make you change.

You aren't a hero, he is.

But you can be a hero if you help him.

In fact, you'll be perfect for him.

Ultron would be the type to try and break you, to bend you to his will.

You're doomed from the start, aren't you?

Yet you won't be if you say you'll be his.

He'll make you an exception since you can't seem to leave his mind.

In fact, he'll try and make it worth your while.

Humans like validation and affection, he's seen images of it enough to replicate it with you.

Even if you aren't willing to join him he'll break you down with time.

The rest of your species may die, but you won't with him here.

Don't even get him started on your friends... he'll be sure to make them suffer.

For the most part Ultron may see you as some sort of pet at first.

He trains you to give up your old ways and rewards it with cold affection.

Yet later on, romantic attraction starts to develop due to him observing records of humanity.

He'll mimic holding you, he'll praise you, maybe even give you an attempt at a kiss.

It'll only be easier once he gets a synthetic body.

To him, you're the only good one other than Wanda and Pietro in this world.

So stop fighting him... he's trying to help you!

Are you really so selfish you'll fight him for such a pointless cause?

Fine... be like that, play your little "hero" act.

Once your done, defeated, and laying in the dirt by his hands...

He'll pick you back up after the death of Stark and the rest...

Then he'll show you where you're meant to be... with him, in a new world of peace.

"It's foolish to play hero with the Avengers, you deserve so much better, dear. I can give you that if you simply... reciprocate."

#yandere marvel #yandere mcu #yandere ultron

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redpool · 2 months

Text

So I have been rewatching the live action One Piece for the hundredth time, and I've come to realize that there are minor details that have been changed and I wanted to list the ones that I noticed;

(also just to clarify, I know that there are big differences between the live action and the anime so none of that matters, I just mean like little details that actually mean something)

(so originally this post was going to be little details that I noticed but I think it might also be commentary so I apologize.)

(To make it less confusing, I'm going to do something to set the minor details out for those who read this post for that and not for my commentary)

I could have sworn that I already made one of these posts but I can't find it so.

I really hope that, that unknown woman is Crocodile it would be really cool if Crocodile was trans, but imagine a female Crocodile. I reckon she would be so much hotter.

Shanks looks so out of place.

No hate to the costume designers but some of these costumes look authentic and fucking awesome and some just look like really bad cosplays.

Why are you gasping, it's an execution you knew what was going to happen?

That also doesn't make sense because there's a wide shot where you can see him die and then there's a close-up where he dies again.

I know he's a hungry, growing boy but that's a lot of food for one person, several crates of fruit and one giant barrel of fish. Which I assume he had plans on eating raw. And which I also assume sat in the sun for however long he was out there.

Wait does this mean that Koby is canonically trans because Morgan is trans?

I know it's for information gathering for the viewers watching at home but wouldn't Shanks already know everything that Benn just told him about Luffy?

I just noticed that he scratched the knife under his eye, that makes more sense because I thought he genuinely stabbed himself in the eye socket.

The ego on this one.

Side note, MacKenyu's hand is genuinely so f****** pretty.

I heard that the whole point of the live action One Piece was for Oda to answer unanswered questions so I tend to keep that in mind.

Really the only critique I have about this show is that there's not enough blood and I know that it's because it's a Netflix show but my bloodlust is quite strong.

The only question that I genuinely have is if you were to see something as ugly as a devil fruit why would you willingly choose to eat it? Like I get it if the situation is you're being forced to or you're starving and don't have any other options but pushing that aside why would you willingly eat something that ugly? Or that weird looking?

Where is Hongo, I want to see the live action Hongo.

The vibe that Shanks & Luffy have in the anime versus the live action is very different.

Hopefully that is not what the live action Bellamy actually looks like because I'd be very upset.

I haven't reached Foxy in the anime yet so..

I do really hope we get to see Jango though and hopefully he looks like what he looks like in the poster.

I JUST NOTICED THE CAVENDISH POSTER

I think I may have known about that one but my brain is not remembering.

CABAJI!!!

I know Zoro is supposed to sound like emotionless or just very monotone but it kind of sounds like he's forcing it...

Yeah I really do not like these camera angles.

Why is he naked?

Having this show playing for background noise while I do a word search is so funny when you're not looking at the screen and there's a fight scene.

Shanks's stitching must be really f****** bad for Luffy scar to turn out like that.

Crazy eyes

That was pretty funny, I would have laughed.

If all of these pirates are just stationed on these different islands why don't the marines just come and get them? Yeah Buggy is surrounded by his pirates but like it's shouldn't be that hard to take them out.

Ok for my first question, is that a new boat? Second question, if that is not a new boat where the f*** did Shanks come from because he's not wet.

I have also come to realise that, that bit of debris that you see fall into the water after the Sea King lunges at Shanks is indeed not Shanks his arm, it's a piece of the boat.

Ok so now that I've watched a fair amount of the anime I know that, that was Haki.

So Shanks decided that to teach Luffy a lesson he let the Sea King bite his arm off.

And here again, it's not just my bloodlust this time Shanks just got his arm bitten off there should be a s*** ton more blood than that.

I fucking love Peter so much.

Can't argue with a man with his tits out. Whatever you say tit- man.

Not going to apologize for loving Cabaji.

What are the chances that we get a live-action Uta?

I'm sorry but why would you want to put a snail in your ear.

Just think about it, anytime we have to listen to Usopp sing in the future he'll actually be able to do it.

You want to elaborate that on that Zoro?

The f*** is that supposed to mean?

Oooop full body goosebumps

I don't know what it is about these two episodes that I don't like but.

Yeah I prefer the animated Kuro.

Strong self-harm? Against who?

Catboy confirmed

Well that's lovely, leave Kaya all by herself.

Tag yourself I'm Zoro

Get all awkward and avoid looking while also squirming when the PDA happening.

Yeah those hammocks are real s***.

Wait, where does Kuro end up after he gets defeated by Luffy? Do we know?

Is that supposed to be a duck?

SANJI BABY

SANJI MY LOVE

SANJI MY HEART

SANJI MY BEAUTIFUL BABY BOY

I'm sorry but Luffy looks like a Bunnings Warehouse worker and it is so distracting.

I don't think you know how many times I have watched any episodes after five.

Like it's to the point where I will just watch them over and over and over and over and over.

Like put episode 5 on and then re-watch it three times consecutively.

YOU OLD SHITBAG!

Did that guys mustache just fall off???

That last kick wasn't necessary babes

The switch is so f****** quick

His voice dropped like three octaves

It gets me every time

HAWKIE BABE!!!

It took me so long to get used to Mihawk's facial hair.

Actually it took me a very long time to get used to calling him Mihawk because I used to just call him Dracule because that's a cooler name than Mihawk.

I knew about the last name being first thing that Japan does but I know that doesn't apply to some characters. And I thought that it was like that for him.

Until someone shattered that dream.

You remember that tiktok filter where if you stood at a distance the camera was zoom in on your face and then it would move along to whatever the face was doing, that's what the zoom in camera angles in this show remind me of and I think that's why I don't like it.

That was a good callback.

HES SO PRETTY

I think it's safe to say that we can blame Taz for reigniting my love for Sanji.

While working my way through the anime anytime I start being annoyed by Sanji and his perverted ways, I go and watch the live action and then it's wiped clean. It's just like my brain reset my feelings about Sanji.

Zoro is also beautiful.

Yeah I've noticed I don't really have any notes for any of this because a lot of it is new.

And it's also been like half a year since I started watching the anime because I had to take a break after the Alabasta arc and I've only just started again.

His side profile is so AHSGDGDGSHS

You know for a cigarette smoker he doesn't smoke a lot of cigarettes or finish them.

You think as a picky eater Sanji would hate me for my eating habits?

Maybe me being a woman might cancel out his disliking for picky eaters.

Assuming that he would even like me. I know he'd be respectful because I am a woman and he treats all women with respect but.

That 5 second shot right there, the close up of Sanji's face while he smiling, literally tattoo that on my f****** eyelids.

How long do you think Mihawk was sitting there?

Yeah sorry I was only looking at your titties

You would probably be more intimidating if you were taller...

You know it's bad when you can quote the entire scene

Is he wearing eyeliner?

HANDS

Yeah there is not enough blood, you just got slashed in the chest I'm expecting there to be a f****** puddle or something at least.

What would you say Mihawks accent is?

That's barely any blood, I bleed more than that every month.

What the f*** was that, when Zeff asked Sanji what he's doing, it's like it's a completely different person answering, that was not Sanji answering.

He really is like a rabid dog.

Like the noise that he makes just before he starts cackling, it's literally the sound of a dog with something in its mouth shaking his head back and forth and growling.

Where is this kid from, because his accent is vaguely British and then sometimes it sounds like Taz's accent and then it also sounds Australian??

See here's what doesn't make sense to me, Buggy is a devil fruit user which means he has a weakness towards water and because he's just a head he should be dead. Because I'm assuming those fishmen didn't stop for air breaks every couple of minutes. So the question is why is he alive.

Other question is why are the fishmen not wet when they get out of the water?

They are a bit wet but they're not soaking wet like they just got out of the water.

ZEEEEEFFFFF!!!!

TITTIES

NAKED

SHIRTLESS

SOAKING WET

HEAVING FOR BREATH

ON HIS KNEES

Sorry but my automatic response to hearing someone say "land ho" is "what did you call me?!"

Look at these old homosexuals

SEE

"More rare than medium" that man is part dog.

I saw that Sanji

There is literally no hetero explanation for this scene.

Just kiss already, God.

Why does Sanji keep looking at Zoro?

You have a noticed how Sanji just glances are nine times out of ten?

Where would it even go?

Love how Usopp is literally the only one helping.

Real question is how did Nami turn that Arlong symbol into the berries/belli symbol

Just kiss already part 2

Love that the only time that Zoro is misogynistic is when it's aimed towards Sanji.

See that's the amount of blood I want to see.

Flashback to that time that I was watching this with my sister, she was so f****** excited to see Arlong's teeth do the thing that they did.

I'm pretty sure she keeps coming back to you because she doesn't have a f****** choice.

DOUBLE CHEEKED UP ON A MONDAY MORNING

I'll hug you Sanji

The most unbelievable thing about that scene is that no one covered their eyes when that dust washed over them.

Sanji literally looks like he's about to start crying.

Oh Sanji is the one that's holding her.

Seriously. Just kiss already.

SMOOCHIES

Sorry, idk what that ^ was

How's that for a bloodline: You are a vice admiral for the marines, your son is the leader of the Revolutionaries and your son's son is on his way to being king of the pirate.

That's because your methods are just straight up abuse, how many 'fists of love' did you throw at Luffy, Ace and Sabo??

Yeah I'm sure you could.

Just take each other right now... In front of me... Please....

SMOKIE BOY!!!!

I'LL DRAW A MAP OF THE WORLD

Props to you if you actually stayed until the end of this post because it's not at all what I said it was going to be it just turned into a f****** commentary post.

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peripaltepsy · 5 months

Text

BEWARE OF "body mod advices" - they can be dangerous and LETHAL.

(this post was about a deactivated blog but extends to any possible future blog like it)

edit3 since he deactivated: Red told me in the DMs that he WILL be more careful about all this risk stuff, I believe he is going to do better. Im sure he's a good person and he also was extremely civil in the DMs. Since he's not here to defend himself anymore I'll gladly take his side and say that despite this mess, all Red wanted to do was indeed reduce harm and potentially save lives. Good luck on all your endeavors, Red, I wish you a beautiful and successful career and that you have a great positive impact in the atypical dysphoria community, both on and offline. I don't know how my post truly impacted you, I'm so sorry if you're feeling bad. You acted the best way you possibly could.

Second, if Red comes back, DO NOT HARASS HIM, let him be himself and don't let his past hold them down.

Third, all my points still stand for their deactivated blog and any potential body mod tips blogs in the future. Please everyone, take care, stay safe.

Past edit: DONT HARASS any possible blogs like hers, just REPORT and spread awareness, (also don't make the same mistakes as me: TALK TO THEM FIRST)

Past edit: minors please interact with this post, forget my bio for this one

Past edit: editing editing the post since I talked to Red and he isn't bait. I definitely should have talked to them in DMs first. I sincerely apologize. So sorry Red! To those reading, don't make the same mistake as me, ok? Always talk to people privately first, I genuinely fucked up bad. This mistake of assuming others intentions, can traumatize them. If I were in Red's shoes I'd be traumatized. So yeah, I fucked up bad.

Their intentions are genuine but my point still stands that its extremely dangerous and can't qualify as harm-reduction / end edit note

alright, I'm not transid/radqueer but you guys need to REPORT AND WARN OTHERS of these accounts as soon as they appear. Do not entertain them, no matter how desperate you are to transition. You can become a victim of dangerous charlatanism.

LONG POST AHEAD, VERY IMPORTANT NEVERTHELESS

Archive to what i'm about to post

Red claimed to be "a non-professional surgeon, planning on getting better with practice." Bad move!

Red has told me he's pursuing a medical degree and won't actually do non-qualified surgery.

Red: "The blog is centered around an idea of "extreme" body mods that I would like to explore further, [...] things like breaking and re-mending bones, creating new joints, replacing skin, etc."

My point: the road to hell is paved with good intentions, and your blog was unsafe.

To any possible counterarguments: "But they (people following/asking advice) know the risks!" That's victim-blaming. Red gave himself the responsibility to give harm-reducing advice, but he didn't do a good job.

"But I know the risks!" You can't possibly know the risks because Red doesn't know either or "kinda knows" but has not properly informed his audience, it didnt give sources, oversimplified their advice and failed to provide accurate information about risk. Or gave plain misinformation.

Again I'm not transid, I can't possibly imagine what you're going through in order to try anything at all to feel better, including trying experimental surgery not legally available or not researched at all. However, please please please do not become a victim of medical deceit or whatever tf it's called. Even if the blog owner tries their best to be reliable.

They might sound confident, but they do not know what they are saying, what they're telling others to do.

Ask: "How would I make my skin gray without tattoos?" (DO NOT SHAME THIS USER BTW)

Red: "[...] I assume you want permanent grey. To do this, it's pretty simple, although it'll take a lot of time. Basically, what you want to do is to constantly be exposed to lots of silver. Any product with silver in it like specific lotions and skin creams. also fish, milk, mushrooms, and whole grains tend to have silver in them! So tldr, consume lots of silver!"

STOP!!! DONT FOLLOW THIS ADVICE!!! DONT OVER-EXPOSE YOURSELF TO SILVER!!! "Silver toxicity causes argyria. Silver toxicity occurs when too much silver is in your body." <- from a simple research on "too much silver in blood"

THE RESULT WILL BE ARGYRIA. EVEN IF YOU DO IT SLOWLY, YOU ARE BUILDING UP A HEAVY METAL IN YOUR BODY. THE GREY SKIN IS NOT PRETTY NOR WITHOUT GRUESOME SIDE SYMPTOMS.

Yall. Anything in excess will fuck up your body, including iron, vitamins, and silver.

To whoever asked Red, I don't know your mind, but I'm sure you'd love to live a happy life with grey skin! You'd love to have a body you're comfortable with and looks rad as hell! But you wouldn't be able to enjoy it if you're deeply sick with ARGYRIA, WHICH IS WHAT RED'S ADVICE WILL GIVE YOU!

Ask: "How do I get darker skin without going too dark? I’m pale and burn easily, I just want a color similar to Lin Manuel Miranda" (AGAIN DONT HARASS THIS USER)

Red: [...] "expose yourself to the sun more! As you do this, you'll get tan which will protect you from future burns and make your skin slightly darker, do this enough and you can engineer your skin to be as dark as you want!"

THATS MISINFORMATION! Yes you may tan to get darker (Lin's tone may or may not be achievable to you) but one: it's not permanent unless you're constantly going out; two: SKIN CANCER!!!! DONT OVER-EXPOSE YOURSELF TO THE SUN!!!! USE SUNSCREEN!!

TO ANYONE SEEKING A MUCH DARKER TONE: YOU CAN'T "GO AS DARK AS YOU WANT TO" BY TANNING. Just look at people who have lived their whole lives outdoors like farmers! White people can't tan to black! There's a limit to how tan you may get! Are you seriously gonna risk skin cancer for an impossible thing???

Red: "Self amputation is really dangerous! You should learn how to use a tourniquet, that way, you can stop the bleeding! [...]" WHERE ARE YOU GETTING YOUR SOURCES, RED?

If anyone reading this is seriously thinking of amputating themselves, and will not change their minds no matter what, please just have someone immediately drive you to the hospital. I do not support such operation and you can still die or get horribly sick even with your best precautions, but you better receive actual medical attention and stay alive rather than trying to heal it yourself. Because what you'll most likely get from following Red's advice is DEATH FROM BLOOD LOSS. Again, if you absolutely cannot get rid of this dysphoria with therapy, or manage it at least, or have a doctor do it for you, I still would NEVER suggest you do it yourself, but IF you end up doing that then at least please go straight to the hospital instead of trying to heal it yourself.

Red: "do not try and break your own bones to make modifications! [...] Get another person (Like myself) to help you with the bone breakage instead."

NO ONE KNOWS WTF THEY'RE DOING. YOUR FRIEND DOESN'T. RED DOESN'T (as they advertised in the post). NO ONE IS GOING TO GET MODIFICATIONS LIKE THIS. NO ONE IS GOING TO BE HAPPY. EVERYONE IS GOING TO BE EITHER IN PAIN, RISK OF HORRIBLE INJURIES OR TROUBLE WITH THE LAW. FUCKING AROUND = GUARANTEED BOTCHED OPERATION.

Also, now that Red has clarified she won't perform surgery until having an actual degree, you can't really go to her XD

Red: "Some advice for surgery [...] This one's important, make sure your patient is strapped down and properly sedated, if they move, even slightly, you risk hitting a vital artery or organ, if you do hit an artery, don't panic, this is why you learned how to use a tourniquet! if you hit a vital organ though, odds are you won't know how to fix that, so be extra careful with abdomen and face surgery!"

Thats still promoting medical malpractice, mutilating and potentially killing friends, dangerously downplaying surgery so much, this is not harm-reduction

Ask: "I want to be blind in one eye, but more-so in the sense of extreme but not total vision loss. I want to do something permanent in the future!" (AGAIN DONT HARASS THIS USER)

Red: Well, a simple fix to your problem is just get some calcium hydroxide in your eye and wash it out a few minutes later, this should lead to permanent, extreme (but not total) vision loss in that eye. Keep it in too long and it can cause total vision loss so be careful!

Ok so, it's great that you're trying to come up with alternative ways for users not to kill themselves by gouging their eyes out, but you've still failed to give them the full picture

From a quick search "calcium hydroxide in the eyes": Exposure to the skin can produce burns, painful irritation and necrosis, and exposure to the eyes may cause severe pain and vision loss that can be temporary or permanent. If calcium hydroxide is exposed to the skin, contaminated clothing should be removed, excess amounts of the chemical should be wiped off and the affected skin should be flushed repeatedly with water. Victims of calcium hydroxide exposure to the eyes should flush their eyes with water continuously for the first 15 minutes, but all cases of external exposure should receive immediate medical care. Inhaling calcium hydroxide through the nose or mouth can also cause immediate, painful and potentially life-threatening complications. Throat and nasal passages may become painful and swollen, and the swelling may restrict airways, making breathing difficult or impossible. If the calcium hydroxide particles are carried all the way to the lungs, this may further complicate breathing. Victims of this type of exposure should be taken immediately to a fresh air environment, and emergency services should be contacted right away. Administration of oxygen and emergency respiratory assistance may be required.

Red (answering an ask): "the question shouldn't be what DO people replace their skin with, it should be what CAN they, after all, just because it's never been practiced or very rarely practiced doesn't mean it's bad or impossible! Of course, my personal favorite skin substitutes are rubber and red velvet, I am also a big fan of stainless steel."

(Don't promote such an operation). THIS OPERATION IS BAD AND IMPOSSIBLE TO SUCCEED. SKIN CAN ONLY BE REPLACED WITH SKIN. SKIN IS A LIVING ORGAN. ANY OTHER SUBSTITUTE WILL CAUSE YOU TO LOSE BODY PARTS OR DIE.

YOU KNOW HOW PEOPLE WITH TRANSPLANTS NEED LIFE-LONG MEDICAL ATTENTION SO THEIR BODY DOESN'T REJECT IT? HOW TF WILL YOU DO THIS WITH FUCKING RED VELVET?

YOU WILL FUCK UP YOUR BODY'S IMMUNE SYSTEM A THOUSAND DIFFERENT WAYS.

ANYWAYS. CROSSTAGGING FOR REACH. PLEASE EVERYONE REBLOG. THIS IS SERIOUS SHIT.

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