#this is the mcu where everything is made up and the comics don’t matter

[amarriageoftrueminds]

Recently, I’ve seen a spike in Peggy Stan’s and I decided to reread your thread and I just wanted to like add some more things you might appreciate so the thing about Peggy that a lot of people bring up is thatoh she Sharon’s Aunt so what she is technically doing with Steve is Incest. But it’s not the thing about Peggy she wasn’t originally that important to cap mythos until now when there had been a retcon around 2005 or 2011 that had made Peggy and Sharon aunt and niece when originally Peggy only knew Steve for a few weeks in the comics and I didn’t really date.in comics was Peggy and her were sisters and he had a history with her was largely ignored but instead the mcu made it stronger because a lot of people have acknowledged that retcon around 2005 or 2011 wasn’t the best especially because of Steve’s and Sharon Romantic relationship.

in my own opinion I feel like the MCU should’ve ignored a lot of romance and allowed him to grow in other ways but the thing about Steve is that he has other important relationships that the MCU didn’t allow him to build on due to Peggy his relationship with bucky the avengers and other people who are important to his life due to them, making her such an important character, they erased, love, interest, friendships, and all these other things, and forced him to go back to the past when a large part of his character is learning to move on and appreciate the life that he already has now in the future and a lot people will continue to debate a lot of these things about you shouldn’t ship there are about a few continuities where Bucky is a child and Bucky is not a child when he meets Steve, they’re the same age so I don’t think there’s anything wrong with shipping Stucky as long as Steve hasn’t interacted with Bucky was a child when he was an adult but basically to wrap everything up. I think Peggy should have been included into the MCU because now she’s having a larger part in the comics which is altering a lot of Steve’s relationships and his continuity.

Anon I think you mean 'should not' have been included in the MCU. She's a parasite that's been allowed to take over the whole host and now the host is dying.

They included a Nazi character (Cynthia Glass) in Cap's story... for no better reason than to give him a pussy to aim for, as if that matters... and now not only have they made that character the MC but they've stolen every other Cap's story and given it to her! (Bucky's everything, then Steve's story, made him revolve around her, and her multiverse stuff in What If was originally Samantha Wilson's from the Gwenpool comics, I believe.)

A Nazi is literally now the main character in the Jewish creator's anti-Nazi story. It beggars belief! Jack Kirby must be spinning in his grave!

It's very unfortunate that MCU Steve has always been in the hands of people who think his story would only be tragic if he didn't have pussy at the end of it; that that is the only relationship that should be allowed to matter, even at the expense of, eg. acknowledging his mother's huge impact on his life.

Even worse that that same corporation, which Jack Kirby would've hated on principal as a Jewish man, which doesn't give a shit about artistic integrity, then bought the comics too, and started changing them to match the shoddy film versions (not just with Cap but with other character's franchises too). In adapting a medium they neither know nor cared about they've simultaneously set out to destroy it. 😕

[sparklesandmarvel]

I'm reposting this because I don't want it getting swallowed up by the length of the post but some of y'all need to get a grip. I had to respond to the person who had som foolishness to say about my post, so to recap:

@ribbonsflyingoutthewindow

All you did was show how ignorant and tone deaf you are. You make several arguments that fall flat for several reasons and are just laughable.

Firstly, I cannot believe Black have to keep saying this, we do not care if you have Black "friends", that is irrelevant to the argument and you can have Black "friends" and still be racist. Saying this actually leads me to believe that you are because why are you throwing around these relationships like you collected tokens you want to cash in? It’s like you are using your “friends” as a veil to poorly hide your racism.

2. My whole post is about the racist reaction to Sam being Captain America and how Bucky wouldn't have been treated like this had he been chosen. Trying to center yourself and your thoughts and opinions about how not racist it is to have a preference is not appropriate.

I literally said "People constantly inserting their opinion "Bucky would've been better," for no actual reason." Referring to the people who say this and give no actual reasons as to why Bucky would be better. At the end of the day people will have preferences and that's fine, but as far as the Captain America preferences go they seem to only prefer white Captains whether they want to admit it or not.

And honestly there is no reason to not want Sam to be Captain America. There isn't. There is not one valid reason. It happened in the comics and Sam was able to do the job just fine, Sam Wilson in the MCU is smart, caring, tough and more than capable of doing the job with or without super soldier serum.

When you said "If you want strictly my opinion (which you don't, but it's the only one you think I'm qualified to give), here it is. Marvel chose Sam to pander to an audience when they could have chosen Bucky and made a statement." This statement proves:

YOU ARE RACIST

Anytime a Black person is chosen for a popular and important role the company is “pandering to an "audience". This is a racist argument and I'm not going to sugarcoat it. It’s racist and spoken by racist people. The fact that you think the only reason why Sam was chosen is to be a token Black man to pander to an audience shows exactly what you think of Black people and how much you value them. If you even watched one episode of The Falcon and The Winter Soldier you’d know just a little bit about why it is such a big deal that Sam is taking over the mantle of Captain America. I’m not explaining it to you because you seem like the type to not care and still push a ridiculous narrative. But I will say considering the history of racism in America that is still prevalent to this day, Sam becoming Captain America is a big deal and does make a statement, it’s just that a lot of white people don’t try to relate to characters and backstories that don’t look like them or remind them of their own.

To address Bucky: I think there is nothing wrong with him getting his mental health together before taking on a role as stressful as Captain America, and where his character was left after Infinity War and Endgame he wasn’t really in a position mentally to take on the role. I don’t like how the Russos acted like he was too damaged to take on the role at some point but Bucky in the comics and in the MCU doesn’t want the role. Him wanting to be Captain America is inconsistent with his character. 

Now this is where the part of your argument gets really funny: 

“And this is really big for me because it has nothing to do with race, but everything to do with origin. Anthony Mackie was born in America. Sebastian Stan came here from Romania after Communism had destroyed so much of their homeland. So this was Marvel's ONE CHANCE to put the shield in the hands of an immigrant. It doesn't matter if an immigrant plays any other role, but to let them play Captain America? That makes such a strong statement it brings tears to my eyes to think about. Marvel has other Black superheroes. There isn't another chance to make an immigrant the face of America.”

You think A WHITE MAN is the BEST choice of an immigrant taking over the role of Captain America? His character isn’t even an immigrant so what the hell would that do? “Marvel has other Black superheroes” How dismissive of the importance and value of Black superheroes. The more you explain yourself the more racist you sound. You don’t need to walk around using the n-word to be racist. There are and will be plenty of chances for an immigrant to take on the role of Captain America, right now it’s going to be a Black man and if you can’t see the significance of that in a country that has and still actively treat Black Americans like trash, then you need to revisit history class and talk to those “Black friends” of yours.

If you really aren’t racist, you need to do some self reflection. Your response shows how dismissive you are of Black characters and their importance. Being more offended at being called racist than actual racism is a problem and detracts from solving the actual problem.

[bulbabutt]

My point was that the later stuff came from a less restrained writers room while the writers in the 80s were held at gunpoint by business men saying "you need to sell this, this, this, and this, make up lore in 15 minutes for a whole cartoon"

I thought you were in favor of artistic decisions being made freely instead of the suits deciding things? for the record the bay movies didn't make that stuff, either, so that criticism's baseless

ironically, you couldn't get away with Christian stuff in the 80s because implying Robot Jesus stuff would have gotten people mad at you, despite it being more conservative back then

You’re literally missing what bothers me about this era entirely. It’s not that the lore is different, it’s not the lore specifically, I genuinely don’t care about that, animated has different lore, beast wars lore also has a biblical nature, a character literally dies for humanity like Jesus himself. That all works there because it comes from a sense of love of life. What I don’t like is the sense of tone to this lore of the biblical nature. It's steeped in 'how else do you write lore but base it on christian themes'. It comes from a very patriarchal world view. That we are in a biblical war because these two warring factions must be at war, their chosen gods were at war. It's frustrating, to see that everything else needs to use that as the lore now. Think about how Superman is a Jesus allegory in the DCEU. Why is that? Because often these men only have one source of lore they think about.

I'm bringing up the bayverse movies because they brought a sense of cynicism, hyper masculinity, and edgy bullshit to the franchise, and specifically all franchises as a whole. The first movie came out in 2007, before the mcu's iron man. The resulting pro military, pro alpha male power fantasy, pro “throw a guy in there from the comic, the nerds will pay to see him no matter how accurate he is” cameos shit that every blockbuster movie has become starts right here. Those movies are bad for a myriad of reasons, but worse for what they do to media as a whole, we're only just recovering from it recently. That first movie (written by the prime creators) opens with this line:

"Before time began, there was the Cube. We know not where it comes from, only that it holds the power to create worlds and fill them… with life. That is how our race was born. For a time, we lived in harmony. But like all great power, some wanted it for good, others for evil."

This is why I am saying the entire problem starts here. It is lazy and narrow world building to base this infinite war on a creationist religion, of strict good and evil. It's extremely post 9/11, extremely mid 2000s. The vibes are bad. I would rather the media have started to say something else, to imply that evil doesn't come from factions. It did in animated, where the lore implies that the autobots are war criminals, and perhaps the decepticons as a whole arent actually the in lore bad guys. There's a sense that if we continued the story, we'd start finding the real cause of the problem (without needing to pull out unicron for once) What went wrong other than trying to make things in line with movie lore/tone/vibes? Most fucking franchises suffer the same problem, so obviously Transformers does too.

I'm not ever saying the 80s cartoon is perfect. The show has dud episodes. The show has racial caricatures, a lack of women, a lack of cohesion. I literally watched it. In one episode Megatron creates new transformers on earth. In another, you need Vector Sigma to create all life. It's very obvious they're introducing characters to sell them, why else would they throw 40 at you in episode one?

But characters in the 80s cartoons laughed together, had a sense of emotional intimacy that disappeared in the mid 2000s (I noticed this watching TMNT as well) I'm saying it’s softer. The characters are gentler, and laugh and hug, share their feelings and hopes. Optimus Prime chuckles often. He no longer does that. Even though it's still Peter Cullen (because nostalgia) he isn't the same Prime. Now he's 'the 13th Prime' or whatever the hell. Now he's on a mission from god.

To share a scene in particular that shocked me for its genuine soft character interaction between friends, something that would never have existed in the late 2000s for obvious 'no-homo' reasons:

I'm watching this media chronologically. I'm reliving 40 years of how we portray characters and relationships and the hardship of war. I grew up in the mid 2000s. I know what happened. I'm seeing it reflected back at me here, and I'm telling you right now I don't like it. I'm exhausted by it. I'm frustrated that this narrow world view is all I get to see now. I wish the lore would have done something more interesting than this. I'm struggling to word that often, but don't come in my ask box saying I don't actually know what I'm talking about just because YOU don't know what I'm talking about. If you don't like how I'M experiencing the media, go form your own fucking thoughts about it.

[ijustreallylikecaptainamericaok]

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 thoughts. Scattered because pain.

- I gotta say right off the bat, best trilogy in the MCU. It’s not even close. And I’m so relieved that they stuck the landing.

- I thought having a Guardians photo album for the end credits was cute. Though it didn’t escape my notice that IW and EG didn’t pop up much (and understandably so.) Hell, the Christmas special got more representation in it than EG did. But the shot of Rocket, Groot, and Thor landing in Wakanda is all they really needed from IW anyway. lol.

- Actually, side bar: Speaking of IW/EG, it just occurred to me after rewatching EG yesterday, where the hell was Kraglin during all that? He joined the team at the end of V2 and appeared to be living on their ship, so what happened? Sean Gunn does Rocket’s mocap, so it’s not like he couldn’t be on set. I guess it doesn’t really matter ultimately, but it’s something I noticed.

- Cosmo was delightful. I knew the “bad dog” gag would would pay off eventually. But still. How dare.

- That fight set to “No Sleep Till Brooklyn.” *chef’s kiss*

- D: “You think I’m stupid.” That cut deep.

- Mantis defending Drax from Nebula was great in context, but it also felt very pointed in a way. Or maybe I’m just projecting because of stuff I’ve seen from other folks in this fandom regarding him and Mantis.

- I know there are issues with Drax’ treatment of Mantis in V2, but their dynamic has become a surprising highlight. The way she freaked out when she thought he died and the way he cried when she left were so impactful.

- The squishy bits of the Orgoscope were unsettling.

- THEY LET PETER SAY “FUCK.” I had to back up the movie to make sure I didn’t mishear. It’s so funny to me that after all the hullabaloo in the fandom about who should/will say the first full, untranslated “fuck” that in the end it came out of Quill and in a pretty mundane moment as well.

- Starmora - I’m actually glad they went the direction they did for Peter and 2014!Gamora. It wouldn’t have made sense and frankly, would’ve been cheap if she’d just fallen for him instantly, because prime!Gamora didn’t either. They were a slow burn and came about, in part, due to the influence the team had on each other.

- I loved when the High Evolutionary’s subordinates turned on him, even if doing so didn’t work out for them.

- Blurp needs to go hang out with Morris from The Legend of the Ten Rings.

- Peter almost dying at the end had me close to raging out. I would’ve been so upset, for so many reasons. Mantis screaming for him and Groot trying to save him destroyed me.

- And since I’ve been putting it off *sighs* ...let’s talk about Rocket. First off, I’m very glad he survived. I’ve worried since V2 that he was a goner and was very glad to be proven wrong. Still, as worried for his fate as I was going into the film, the thing that concerned me the most was finally getting into the nitty gritty of his backstory. I knew from the bits of the comics I’ve seen that it was going to be highly upsetting and... yeah... that’s putting it mildly. Case in point, the fact that the first word out of his mouth was “Hurts.” And it just gets worse from there. Just pain all the way down.

- G: “I’m family!” N: “So is he.” Between that line and Nebula crying upon hearing Rocket’s voice again, the five year gap clearly made them very close. And it makes sense given all of their similarities, too. That Nebula thinks what happened to him is worse than what she endured speaks volumes about what was done to him.

- And finally, everything with Batch 89 was obviously heartbreaking, but oh my God, Floor. I don’t know why that character in particular tugged at my heart, but she did and... yeah. There’s that.

So, yeah, in short, this movie made me a mess, but all the Guardians films do and I’d be disappointed if it didn’t punch me in the face.

Metaphorically, of course.

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

Sorry I was asking what you thought about the skip westcott storyline in the comics. But he’s you answered it beautifully and I agree with you about fearing the MCU would try to tackle CSA because they don’t have a good track record on how they tackle assault and all I could think about was one my favorite exploration on Skip Westcott and what would happen if his assault was revealed to the general population that storyline was that the author made a point to say

“One that Peter put on everyday, along with a red and blue suit and the memory of an uncle he had lost to petty crime. And to make this all about Skip, to claim it was just his way of coping - like every single psychologist that had gone on the news with insight into the psyche of Spider-Man - would debase all that. Yes, Peter was still affected by what had happened. Yes, when he hit sexual predators the hardest, it was personal. But Peter was still Ben’s nephew, and he was so much more than what Skip had made him”

I don’t know a comment in your story First Step of Kintsugi wrote about a possible reference to Skip and all I could think about was Peter goes through so much but fundamentally he is a child trying to survive and trying to live up impossible standards he set before him as a tribute to his Uncle and if Skip was a part of his backstory then it’s does not define him but would still affect him and his aunt. Also Frank would absolutely murder Skip if he ever found out.

Same deal as before, this post discusses skip westcott so everything is below the line. 

Oh, he would. It’s probably why I’ll never write a story about Frank finding out about Skip.

Like, Frank Castle is the guy in the Marvel Universe who fucks up child predators. He pretends to be a 12 year old little girl on the internet and tells the creep to meet him in the park, and carry peonies so little susie can find him. NMCU had multiple scenes of him fucking up pedophiles.

And Frank’s someone who, time and time again, is shown to just kind of—I don’t want to say lose it, but kind of run rampant when the people he loves are involved. A very controlled brand of crazy. He will run roughshod over all other considerations when it comes down to the people he cares about, and it’s fully in character for him and his backstory, and it can usually make for some pretty interesting character dynamics and interactions. Like, Karen’s in danger (because she called a serial bomber a little bitch boy while speaking to him directly and broadcast it for the entire world to hear) and Karen will be saying “frank no” and micro will be saying “frank no” and getting involved will endanger franks entire shit and frank will be saying “fuck off frank yes” and he’ll do it anyway.

And that can make for interesting conflict and cool fight scenes. Except this is one of those times where I don’t think it works for the underlying story.

Because the person he’s killing is Peter’s abuser. And like—I don’t think there’s any doubt in anyone’s mind that if you abuse the punishers kid, you die. But it does kind of require discounting peters own mindset on the matter, because Peter is very anti-killing and would almost definitely be opposed to frank’s solution. killing skip would be about frank and he felt, not Peter. 

I just don’t see how it would help Peter himself. Like, franks not gonna fix him by giving him a hug or being a somewhat trustworthy adult or something. There’s nothing to fix. He’s not broken. No magic healing adult is going to change what happened or undo the effects with one soulful conversation. like, to me, Frank exact revenge on his behalf mostly just services frank’s own emotional reaction rather than helping Peter in any real way.

Which I why i don’t engage with the majority of the Skip Westcott stories on AO3. A lot of the ones I’ve seen are usually like--the avengers or tony or someone finding out and the emotional effects on them. Or them getting revenge for Peter or like, healing him emotionally or whatever. It often just ends up about the pain of the people who find out rather than like, Peter himself, if that makes sense. Or it just becomes trauma porn. 

And, to be clear, I am casting no moral judgment or whatever on those fics or people who like or read them. Revenge stories aren’t inherently bad or whatever.  Like, the Equalizer was a cool, fun, engaging movie that can be pretty adequately summarized as a revenge movie. Frank Castle fucks up a lot of child molesters because hey--that’s a pretty satisfying group of people to see fucked up. Good fodder for revenge stories. 

I find a lot of literary analysis on tumblr and on most social media platforms that I’ve seen tends to engage with content in overwhelmingly moralistic terms, which i just don’t find very helpful. Don’t get me wrong, there’s definitely moralistic discussions to be had when it comes to writing decisions, I just don’t think it’s nearly to the degree that it’s been proliferated. Moralistic terms in the analysis of art ends up being used as a sort of sledgehammer that misses a lot of the point of analysis entirely. I feel like a lot of the literary analysis that I see popularized nowadays ends with “and that’s why this writing decision is morally wrong” which, again, absolutely can be the case and are conversations to be had, it’s just that it’s used as a trump card a lot of the time instead of engaging in real analysis. But that’s also not all literary analysis on modern social media platforms. I may just be jaded from TikTok. 

I could probably write a pretty convincing analysis of the Equalizer about how it reflects on women and sex workers and power fantasies, etc, etc, that I don’t actually agree with. I dunno, I think I’m good at arguing and hyperaware of how easy it is to convincingly frame literary analysis in moralistic terms and lead the audience to conclusions that I don’t even agree with. This is a very long winded way of saying that this analysis of Skip Westcott’s use on AO3 is not me saying that I think people who write stories like that or enjoy stories like that are bad or wrong, it’s just not the kind of story that I enjoy reading, and not a story that I’m all that interested in writing. I’m not shitting on people who write revenge fics. It’s just not my cup of tea. I think a lot of using AO3--and reading in general--comes down to curating your experience, and I just tend to curate away from most Skip Westcott stories.

I also do want to make a point of saying that like, you did not imply or suggest what the rant above was about, I am just very good at seeing balls buried under ten feet of mud, digging them out, and running with them. I just go on tangents. I’m not arguing against anything you said. 

I have also seen the discussion of Skip Westcott in the comments. I’m not going to like, confirm or deny anything because I feel like saying anything about the content appearing in the future of this series risks spoiling it for some people? Like, even if it’s just saying “yeah that’s not happening,” I feel like it may spoil things for people who like to figure it out along the way. But I do want to say that if anyone’s ever worried about triggering subject matter appearing in one of my fics, they can DM me directly and I’ll tell them if it shows up, the extent of it, etc. I try to keep up with content warnings, especially in individual chapter titles, but sometimes I slip up and sometimes stories develop after I make the original tags that have triggers I didn’t anticipate. I probably need to update the main tags on Kintsugi anyway, because I ended up talking more about the details of the human trafficking ring and MJ’s comic backstory a little bit more than I planned on when I first started it. 

I know the story you’re referring to, and the point being made is the same. It’s probably because I wrote it. 

I don’t regret writing that story, but I have regrets about it, if that makes sense? I guess a part of me wishes that I had been a bit older and a bit more skilled at the time. I was in like, high school. I was a literal child whose brain hadn’t finished developing yet. Technically my brain still hasn’t finished developing but at least it’s been cooking for a lot longer than when I was in fucking high school. I can’t remember if I even had a year of writing experience at the time, I had barely any experience in fandom, and writing it probably wasn't the best mental health decision I could have made. Skip Westcott was also borderline unknown, at least on AO3, at the time I wrote it? Like, organize Skip Westcott tags by date posted, and i think that’s like the first english language mention of him. So I’m like, weirdly aware that that original mention potentially spurred a lot of stories I don’t personally vibe with. Life’s a comedy. 

I know it ended up meaning a lot to a lot of people, so I leave it up, but it’s not exactly something I go back to reread. I just seems sloppy to me now. My writing’s changed a lot since then and there’s a lot of topics I discussed there that I wish I had handled with more nuance than I did. Which, again, I was a teenager with very little writing or fandom experience, so like, I understand why it happened the way it did. There’s stuff that I look at on my current AO3 account where I think the writing’s amateur hour. Hating your old shit is part of getting better as a writer. I’m glad you liked it.

[tinseltine]

I realized this is JLaw‘s first official comedy – “Silver Linings Playbook” and “Joy” are each a dramedy. “Don’t Look Up” is funny, but its genre would be cautionary/Scifi. Lawrence was the comic relief in “American Hustle”, but again, a satire, not a broad comedy.  I’m glad she finally found herself here. 

The Blackening’s got the feel of Bodies Bodies Bodies, just not as clever.  You can see the twist ending coming from a mile away. But as someone whose black card is always in threat of being revoked, due to having grown up on a constant diet of corny, white fare; I liked the irony of a board game of actual black cards, where each character has to answer culturally black trivia in order to stay alive!  And yup, if I were playing, my black card would once again have been in jeopardy, cause for a number of the questions, I’d have been about as much help as I’d be in an escape room requiring math. 

Overall I enjoyed the film and thought this fresh take on the Flashpoint event was creative. Just not as creative as the 2013 film, which still had meta-humans and heroes, with each of them in different roles than what they are in the traditional DC’s Earth-Prime version. For instance, Bruce Wayne was killed in the alley that famous night instead of his parents; turning his father into Batman and his mother into the Joker. Superman is captured and nowhere to be found. Cyborg is a resistance leader, giving America a fighting chance within a war between Aquaman’s Atlanteans and Wonder Woman’s Amazonians. Aquaman cheated on his wife Mera with Diana and it led to this major war.

Vibrant all the way around, story, visuals, characters! Although, I’ll admit, I got a little sleepy a few moments before we meet the super cool Spider-man named Hobie Brown, aka Spider-Punk voiced by Daniel Kaluuya, but that could have been due to the heaping portion of Chinese food I ate at the beginning of the movie. This Spider-Punk was my favorite spidey. Kauuya says he: put a lot of emphasis on what matters to the fans when it came to finding his superhero’s voice, so much so that when he first took on the role of Spider-Punk he listened to fan-made playlists dedicated to the character to understand how they saw him rather than choose to base him on any punk rock icons of the past.

Me and my sister came out of Disney’s Live Action The Little Mermaid smiling from ear to ear feeling as though it managed to capture and hold true to everything we loved about the animated original and at the same time, embracing the world of today with beautiful diversity. But then I read The New York Times review by Wesley Morris and he just makes me feel stupid for enjoying the movie. I suppose he has some salient points like “This new flesh-and-blood version is about a girl who’d like to withdraw her color from the family rainbow and sail off into “uncharted waters” with her white prince.” Also, although I loved Halle Bailey’s interpretation of Ariel, his review now makes me question, does she imbue varied enough facial expressions while mute?

The Mother explores themes of family, redemption and identity, as Lopez’s character (with no name) struggles to reconcile her past and present. It’s not a groundbreaking or original movie by any means. It borrows heavily from other action movies like “Taken”, “Salt” and “Atomic Blonde”. The plot is predictable, the villains are one-dimensional and the moments of warmth aren’t very moving. But it’s entertaining, and it’s JLo, so stream it!

I definitely feel GOTG3 has stronger beats than Ant-man Quantumania, but it’s still a little long and lacking a certain spark had by the prior 2 movies of this MCU franchise. I think we need to go back to keeping the films just under 2 hours. Infinity War and End Game each needed to be nearly 3 hours because of so many characters and major story arcs, but with these sequels, no matter how beloved the characters, there’s not enough to fill them. I love superhero movies and particularly the MCU, but lately I can always feel the point in which they should be wrapping up, yet there’s 40-45 minutes still to go. 

THIS WAS TINSEL & TINE'S #MINIMOVIEREVIEW EXTRAVAGANZA #14 for complete content - https://tinseltine.com/minimoviereviewextravaganza14/

[3pirouette]

Different anon here

I saw MoM on Thursday and now that I’ve had more time to digest it, I have some questions and thoughts. My first question is vagueish but my second is definitely spoilery.

First, do you think they showed too much in the trailers or is there anything that you think could’ve been done to lower your expectations for the movie? I agree with your other anon answer in that I think I had too high expectations going into the movie and it kinda messed with my opinions immediately coming out of it. Partly because of theories online but also because I think they showed too much in the trailers. To add more of a shock factor, I think they should’ve left out everything to do with the Illuminati.

Second, what are your thoughts on Wanda’s arc post WandaVision and where do you think she goes from here? I really loved how they showcased that Wanda is definitely the strongest Avenger out there and I think Elizabeth Olsen does a really good job conveying Wanda’s emotions throughout the film. Also in true Marvel Studios fashion, the power of love and family heals everything lol. However, I’m a little worried about what Marvel is doing in just “killing off” characters left and right. Like in Hawkeye (spoiler here if you haven’t seen it), Kingpin gets shot by Echo/Maya and we just assume he’s dead. However, there’s a comic book storyline where Kingpin gets shot and is blinded by Echo, so are they going in that direction? We don’t know because we never see a dead body. Same thing happens in MoM with Wanda, we don’t see a body so anything can happen from here. For some reason, these “come back from the supposed dead” or “I didn’t actually die, I just made you think that” storylines/tropes don’t sit well with me. I wouldn’t mind revisiting the characters again in a different universe and seeing how their lives play out in a different universe, but bringing back the same character in the same universe feels icky to me. Maybe it’s because of what they did to Palpatine in Star Wars episode 9, but I don’t think I like how they just “killed” Wanda.

Ok. so..

Yes. Commercials were far too spoilery. No matter WHAT my expectations were, if they'd kept the illuminati a secret (despite leaks) I would have enjoyed it much more. Period. Spoilers are the bane of my existence because when I get a little information my brain tries to fill it in and I am INEVITABLY disappointed.

As for Wanda's Arc... I don't know. the more I watch it, the more I feel like we got cheated out of some integral piece of her turning dark and we're going to get cheated out of her coming back. I think she WILL show up again, maybe as a good guy, maybe as a bad guy... but I think we're getting cheated on her story. One thing we've seen consistently is that the MCU touches on, but never really spends time with, the emotional turmoil of their characters. I think she'll be back and I don't think we'll get a good answer as to why, how, or good emotional closure with it.

[toogayforthistoday]

Hey I hope you don’t mind me asking, but what’s the familial dynamic like between your self insert and Frank? And How does Frank get along with your other marvel f/os?

Because from at least my perspective, putting Wanda, loki and Frank in the same room… probably won’t end well. but they also have the common detail of they lost people they care about and are in the grieving process (although the handling of said grief varies).

Do you think they would bond over that shared loss or is it a ‘they are at each other’s throats regardless of the situation’ type of thing? /genuine, lighthearted

Anyways, SORRY ABOUT THIS WEIRD ASK, I’m just curious to see your thoughts / hear about your interpretation/your version of canon source material /genuine

Hey Ridley, I don't mind the question at all!

Source material-wise, I lean more on The Punisher (2004) than Netflix's Punisher, as I haven't seen it yet. And as for my other Marvel f/o's its sort of a mix of everything? Comics, MCU, Fox's X-Men (The animated series specifically for Remy)

Me and Frank met each other during a joint training exercise where he unofficially adopted me as his little Canadian brother, cause I'm a cheeky little shit and he thought it was amusing. This was before Frank was deployed to Afghanistan. And before Loki... Fell.

After I'd heard about what happened to his family, I left the school and went up-state to help, or at the very least keep him in one piece. He never wanted me to get involved, but I was his best man, and I adored Maria, like hell I'd let him deal with it alone. Doesn't matter if I've got my dad's mutation, now, and will live through anything these guys will try and throw at us... Punisher or not, he's still got a big heart.

Frank is like my father, Logan, and has always questioned my choice in Loki, but he made me happy, so they just did their best to intimidate a God.

As you can imagine, it never really deterred Loki in the slightest.

But Frank won't make a move against Loki (unless Loki starts it). And so far Loki's listened to me about not provoking him. Doesn't stop either of them from glaring at the other.

Frank and my dad get along in that weird guy way where they'll sit in silence with each other, and then afterwards they'll both tell you they had a great chat.

(Remy is an alternate timeline f/o from Loki, but Frank isn't a fan. It's not that he doesn't like him, he just wishes Remy would shut up sometimes. Remy's a very talkative man, and talks to fill the silence. Frank knows what Remy does for a living.)

Wanda... (Pre Wanda-Vision, haven't seen it yet) Luckily for me they haven't been in the same room yet, but I agree with you, I don't think it'd be quiet for too long. But I think they'd probably be willing to grieve together over their losses.

But no, thank you so much for asking! I really don't mind answering any questions about my f/o's, and how they interact with each other~

~Gabe

[roleplayerconfessions]

🌴 It's pretty scary how deeply-entwined brands and media have become in some peoples' identities, and self-worth, to the point of being incredibly destructive, both for them and others. Especially when you combine this with a total lack of critical thinking and self-awareness.

There used to be a time where you could dislike something without being othered by people who did like it. There was a time where you wouldn't get told you "weren't a real fan" because you didn't like a new adaptation. But now, people get crucified for both of these things, because people have internalized their favourite media and brands so much that they literally cannot differentiate between the brand and themselves as an individual anymore. It's all been mixed up into one unvaried thing. If someone says they don't like a brand that you happen to like, well, it must mean they don't like you as a person! And that can't be allowed, no sir, something something No True Scotsman.

Case in point, and the reason I'm writing this: the Marvel fandom. Good grief. Consider this for a moment: it's totally acceptable, and even encouraged, when you don't like all of the comic book writers and runs for a character. Love David? Hate Taylor? Cool! Agree to disagree! There is so much variety; it's impossible to like everything. But the moment you say you don't like certain MCU movies, which are basically the film equivalents of comic runs, it's a cardinal sin, and you're looked at like you have a third eyeball. People genuinely don't understand how you can write a Marvel character, yet dislike many MCU movies. Because they're so absorbed in the MCU and its hype, its fandom, its everything, that now they see the MCU as the be-all, end-all of Marvel. They're so absorbed in it that everything remotely resembling a dislike for it now, no matter how valid the reason, is a personal attack on them, and they react by alienating anyone with a differing opinion. And boy, have I suffered a stupid amount of this shit without even going out of my way to provoke it. So many muns, who randomly looked at my blog, have decided to bitch and moan when I did literally nothing except say "I'm not interested in the MCU anymore, please don't talk about it with me".

Like, gasp! How can I possibly write a Marvel character, but not love the recent MCU movies?! The horror! I must not be a real fan! I must be a horrible person! I mean, I wrote this character way before the MCU came around, but sure - I guess I should drop them, and all those years of development, just because Disney recently made some stuff I don't like! I certainly can't continue writing them as usual, and simply ignore the releases I don't like! ...Ugh... This seems ridiculous, but it breaks a worrying number of peoples' brains, and their reactions can be vicious. The Marvel fandom feels less like a fandom these days, and more like an echo chamber.

I stay so, so far away from certain RP fandoms now because of this, including the Marvel fandom. And it's a damn shame, because I'd really love to write with Marvel and MCU characters, but so many muns are totally incapable of understanding the above stuff. And at this point, frankly, interacting with anyone in the Marvel fandom feels like playing a game of minesweeper where there's one safe tile and the rest are all mines.

[nightcoremoon]

Tom Holland is a good actor, a great spiderman. I won’t say anything negative about his performance.

No Way Home essentially ruined the character.

Anyone can be a superhero. Xmen has hundreds of characters with awesome superpowers but very few of them are good characters. DC has several characters in the comics with squandered potential. Superman and Shazam and Aquaman are all capable of being great characters as we’ve seen from recent films, but in a lot of the comics they’re just vehicles to deliver plot with. oh superman needs to freeze something, he has magical frost breath; magic eye lasers; magic telekinesis; MAGIC FUCKIN FABRIC S HE THROWS AT YOU THAT MAKES YOU FALL OVER FOR TEN SECONDS AND THEN BE FINE. Shazam goes Shazam and magic beans go and do a thing. Aquaman is like FIIIIIIISH and fish go do some random bullshit. The good stories involving them are in the minority, especially in comparison to Batman. Now, it’s ludicrously difficult to fuck up Batman. He is easily the best thing DC has ever made. He has the best and strongest character writing of any DC superhero, and in fact, nearly every marvel superhero too. Dark Horse wishes they were on the level- much as I love hellboy spawn & umbrella but they are so many levels below batman levels of iconic. Try listing iconic metal bands and convincing anyone that above megadeth pantera slayer and cannibal corpse should be fucking MGK. and I say that liking some of his work (but goddamn is he such a fucking scumbag douchelord sometimes). Anyway Marvel has its fair share of great characters but a lot of them are… bad. at least nowadays. no love for gambit or psylocke or firestar or magma or polaris. fucking polaris, you know, quicksilver and scarlet witch’s sister? I think. maybe. I don’t know, there’s too many comics out there to worry about all of it. but that’s the thing. the market is oversaturated. there’s too many cool powers but not enough character development.

and then there’s spiderman.

I daresay spiderman is marvel’s greatest creation. he is marvel’s batman; the best of the best, the cream of the crop, characterisation perfected. if not the best he is definitely up there. and he’s definitely the most loved.

and for good reason! spiderman is special not because his powers are super unique and interesting in the realm of comics. ok yeah he’s fast and strong and he can do spider webs and he can fight. but there are a lot of spidermans out there. way too many. even scorpion and doc ock and uncle ben and j jonah jameson have all been spiderman once. same powers for the most part. but we don’t really care about most of them. and why? because peter parker is easily the best //character//. and don’t worry, miles is a close second. in fact, spiderverse is probably the best spiderman movie of the 10 based on everything that isn’t spiderman related. miles and peter both have very strong developed characters that have nothing to do with the spiderman persona. this is what makes spiderman special. he’s not just spiderman. he’s peter parker. he’s miles morales. he’s all of us. we are all spiderman. we can relate to him. we can see ourselves in him. no matter what walk of life you come from, we can all understand where he comes from; he’s just some dude. but he’s a good person. we got to see him as peter or miles for a long time before he got bit by that spider. well… except for holland. but that’s fine because where the other peter films faltered was in things besides peter. but not the mcu spidermans. if anything, this is the best spiderman that has ever graced film… spiderverse is an animation which is valid and great but we can all agree that they’re different mediums, and that spiderverse is easily a 10/10 whereas all the others range from 7-9. yes, spiderman 3 and the amazing spiderman are both 7s. no lower. don’t question me. ok anyway the point is we all love spiderman and peter parker.

mcu spiderman operates a little differently. in civil war he’s already established as a friendly neighborhood spiderman; he’s where we were at in the sequels in his cameo in steve rogers’ trilogy finale and tony stark’s initiation into Definitive Main Protagonist territory and T’challa’s introduction and Scott Lang’s return to form and etc etc. he’s just there to help tony stop steve from committing war crimes. we get time with both peter and spiderman. we get a sense of his character. he’s just a young kid with bright eyes and starry dreams and a real sense of duty. he understands that with great power… you know the rest. it’s an establishment of his place in the universe. we’ve already killed uncle ben, we don’t need to rehash that. we know who he is. we get it. and that’s what made civil war such a great film; it is easily by far the best ensemble writing in the entire franchise.

then in peter’s solo romp we get more of peter himself. he’s only spiderman for a short time in the film, and even then most of it he’s not using his powers to fight, he’s fully injecting his personality into every scene. we can see how much he looks up to stark and how much he wants to help the avengers and how much he’s willing to give up popularity and homecoming and the mathletics and good graces of school staff for the sake of being the hero that the plot demanded. he is not a superpower to deliver plot; the plot happens and he has to react to it. homecoming was a phenomenal spiderman movie and deserved all of the high marks it got. and then infinity war happened and, he was also good in that too. and then he died. and then endgame happened and he came back to life! but then tony died. and he was sad. very sad. the sadness bled into far from home and he found a new mentor in fury who was actually talos, he pursued the other side of the coin that was wishing to be the peter he wanted to be now that the world demanded spiderman in the wake of stark’s loss, he realized that he’s not a kid anymore and he can’t afford to be so selfish because of that whole great power thing. he found a happy medium.

and then jameson had to go and fuck it up /positive

(I loved that cameo)

and

…

this is where the positivity ends.

I fucking hated no way home.

I genuinely think it ruined spiderman for the future of the mcu.

it affirmed my belief that endgame and far from home are the absolute final pieces of the marvel puzzle that will constitute my enjoyment. no more. never again. it’s over. I am perfectly satisfied with it ending there.

now, don’t get me wrong, I did enjoy most of it. I liked doctor strange taking on the mantle of mentorship. I liked the way they brought together a bunch of the untied plot threads of the amazing duology, and the fanservice from raimi’s trilogy was comforting. I felt like 3 ended as well as it could have and sufficiently tied it all together, so maguire (and norman) functioned to give us the uncle ben moment that was such an effective gut punch that came from out of nowhere especially after teasing her and happy together. it felt like iron man 4; we saw that they could move on from the grief of his loss. but then right smack dab in the middle BOOM we get a devastating tragedy right when the plot needed a kick in the pants. and the final fight scene was very well done; right up to the moment maguire stopped holland from stabbing norman AND THEN EVEN AFTER THAT. the movie ended with everything going back to normal.

…god I wish I could say that.

STUPID FUCKING GODDAMN MULTIVERSE PHASE FIVE DISNEY GREEDY CORPORATE MEDDLING BULLSHIT

sorry, I had to get that out of my system

ok so yeah the multiverse almost fucking exploded and then the universe had to purge its knowledge of peter parker. you know, the one thing that makes spiderman special. now he’s just a sad boy with dead parents and a magic nanobot suit. completely indistinguishable from a whole host of boring garbage saturating the market. so whatever the fuck disney is forcing its people to do with a gun to their heads is gonna be just… so fucking bad. I don’t care anymore. I legit don’t give a shit. They took a promising start to a long franchise and just squished it into the dirt because they want wanda to be the next thanos. they should have ended it a long fucking time ago. and now they’re going to force keaton back in it and force us to acknowledge morbius and ruin venom and come up with some random dumbass bullshit to fill a sinister six roster. I am so fucking disappointed with disney for screwing get more actors of color out of long contracts. I’m not shocked at all that downey evans & holland and all the other white men get like 400 billion dollars. it’s an atrocious travesty. my baby is aflame.

Spiderman is dead.

Marvel is dead.

The mcu is over and I don’t give a shit about it anymore.

I’m gonna write my own fix it fic and slap a flex tape on that shit and make it all better because I’m a better writer than whoever’s pulling the strings right now.

[russelldworld]

You know it’s funny people are calling the writing in forsaken “cringe” when really, in my opinion it’s the exact opposite. it’s not that forsaken is cringe, it’s that it’s trying so hard to be not cringe it’s become cringe inducing. It’s a style of writing I call “anti-cringe” or “anti-narm” Narm is a term I'm borrowing from TV tropes, and it’s basically whenever a scene is so over the top, unrealistic, unintentionally goofy, that it takes the view out of the experience. It’s basically where a scenario becomes so unrealistic it brakes suspension of disbelief and becomes comical. And I’m convinced somewhere somehow avoiding harm suddenly became the mandate of every pice of fiction targeted at an audience over 15. One of the most famous sources of narm, especially in the early 90′s and 00′s when everything was going edgy, was tonal dissonance. Most famously when things that were ridiculous were treated with absolute seriousness and played completely straight. Now if your gonna avoid harm their are only 2 real ways to do it, 1) their is nothing ridiculous in your work, the setting is either entirely realistic or the fanatical elements are limited in scope and made to be as in line with our real world as possible 2) Lampshade EVERY fantastical eminent calling out had unrealistic and weird it is so that your characters and audience will never feel disconnected, and only have your characters treat the grounded elements (death, metaphors, romance, ect) seriously. And when looked at through this lens suddenly forsaken, and the breath of MCU movies that are stuffed to the gills with jokes and meta humor make so much sense. High fantasy and Super-heros are two things that just can’t be fully grounded. They are inherently fantastical and at times ridiculous concepts. (Flying beast Roma the skies while cosmic forces middle behind the scenes in complex and over convoluted planes that must be solved by a single midget and his jewelry, men in spandex decide the fate of the world by shaming into yachter.) So instead everything must be lampshade, all the characters must feel as skeptical and unbelieving of the fantastical as any one consumer might be. Here’s the when focus on avoid narm in a fantastical setting not only do you wind up writing characters who seem uninvited, uninterested, and disbelieving of their own world, you lose narm charm. This is where scene is unrealistic or kind silly, but you, don’y care. You’r so bought into the world and story and the myths it’s built that no matter how ridiculous it is you on the edge of your seat.

You can’t get that if you're constantly making jokes at your own expense, how is the audience supposed to buy into this world if the character themselves don’t.

[jamesbi-canonbarnes]

Going mad ok so I understand Bucky is not the white wolf in the comics and has nothing to do with the person who goes by that moniker in the comics. If I thought we were going to get the actual white wolf story from the comics in the mcu it might make me feel Bucky can’t be called white wolf, but the thing is they have already been calling him white wolf, which leads me to conclude already either 1) they will never introduce comics white wolf anyway, whether they keep it a shallow nickname or possibly let Bucky take more of the story of white wolf and subsume/replace that character (thinking about Arnie Roth hours) or 2) they will treat it as a mantle that can be shared and passed on like the cap mantle and others. I find option 1 much more likely as I don’t see room for the comics white wolf in the mcu. If either, I have no problem with them expanding Bucky’s identity as white wolf, as this is a completely different universe than the comics, and they have ALREADY NAMED HIM SO. (Not that we can’t judge the mcu for choices we think are bad, we can. But divergence alone is not my problem).

I think the thing certain tfatws viewers are hitting on is that the show seems like it’s setting him up to take on a new name. In the first ep he literally says “I’m no longer the winter soldier.” Just from that and the strong subtext surrounding it, in order for him to properly hit his development/arc he would *have* to either *himself* choose a new “alias” name or explicitly/verbally accept that name again as his in healing but he does NOT, he’s called only “Bucky” and “Sergeant Barnes” in the last episode, and throughout the show he calls himself and is called “white wolf” (in the context of healing-restitution-reconciliation/invoking peace and rehabilitation/acknowledging his own goals) plus being called Bucky/buck/James/barnes etc. in varied but mostly neutral or at least averaged out to be neutral context. He is only called Soldat/ws by zemo and by strangers in madripoor iirc, and certainly not in the context of healing. And while I believe he either does call himself the winter soldier or strongly implies that at least in ep 5, it is again not in a context of healing but of self hate and fear, showing how he sees himself and how he has NOT reclaimed the name. His last statement on the fact is to Yori, where he says “he was murdered by the winter soldier.. and that was me... I didn’t have a choice.” *was* and “I didn’t have a choice.” But now that he does have a choice, what is the choice???? Closing the chapter on that era??? Seems like (sunset, right?). But it never textually hits either of the conclusions earlier laid out (choosing to reclaim the name or choosing a new name). This makes it feel like his development is unfinished, and IMO it feels like it doesn’t really make sense to leave it unfinished if he was going to continue using that name because he would only have to say like one sentence to tie it up, whereas any other name would take more than that. So it only makes sense narratively to leave it unfinished if he still requires further development, like a second season or a movie worth, to figure out his name (we know his name is very important to him- “it’s Bucky” “my name is Bucky” “my name is James Bucky barnes” “you don’t get to call me that” etc.) he has his chosen (reclaimed) person name, now he needs to choose (and/or reclaim) his hero name. We just saw him realize that saving ppl is what he wants to do (“[free] to do what?”->”be of service” -> “thank you for saving us”) (he now NEEDS a hero name/hero identity) and on the other side we saw him retraumatized when he stepped back under the winter soldier name in ep 3. The show frames his completing his amends as putting his past behind him (literally getting rid of it in the form of leaving the book and not returning to therapy) but it does not answer the question of what’s in front of him (besides Sam). We have seen him subtextually reclaim his prosthetic arm(using it for good in the last two eps and finding joy from it) AND his “white wolf” nickname(verbal reinstatement from Ayo and a happy physical response from Bucky), but NOT the “winter soldier” name. Even the arm is not the same prosthetic he used as Soldat but one that is inextricably wakandan, and therefore is not enough for me to be a symbolic stand in for the name.

Yes I agree that him reclaiming the name in the comics is healing and meaningful and could be the same in the mcu if they actually put in the work to draw that explicitly (which IMO they have not, and I don’t trust that they will) but it is not the only way to heal and move on, the same can be done by choosing his own new name, his own moral grounding, his own chosen family. (Ayo’s “you chose us. Chose me.”) there is not one right way to heal.

The thing is, the show did not address the name, and the arc feels unclosed due to that. It is annoying that they have him say he is not the winter soldier at both beginning and end (and middle w zemo in ep 3) and yet the title calls him that throughout. If he had specifically reclaimed that name in the show I would be perfectly happy with that, but he did not. The fact that they changed Sam’s name but not bucky’s when their journeys of healing through choosing heroism and finding a new identity are purposely paralleled feels off. It feels off because of the way they framed the show, and not bc I personally have an independent desire for him to change his name. (Although I do think a lot about chosen names from the perspective of trans healing, and I think that’s something to consider here). White Wolf is the option presented, and I can certainly see why people are hitting on it based on the text of the show.

If he eventually takes the name “White wolf” as his hero name I do agree it should have more build up/development and for me personally to accept it I would require a much deeper connection with wakanda than Bucky now has. Possibly we will get it in cap 4, possibly there are not plans to give Bucky real further development, only to keep him on as a sidekick. I don’t personally see him “earning” that name as IMO it would require a major shift away from being cap’s sidekick and into his own separate (distinctly not America-centered) storyline which is what I don’t see happening. But at the same time, mcu has already demonstrated a willingness to give shallow development for its choices, and this could be another example of that being telegraphed. Or who knows, maybe the above points that make his arc feel unfinished are just due to sloppy writing. I won’t rule that out, but I will appreciate if comics readers stop trying to gatekeep mcu fans excited about the possibilities of a universe that is literally not the same universe! It’s an au! The creators can and will change whatever they want. While we can of course judge those changes, I’m much less comfortable judging viewers for reading possibilities presented by the canon text just because the possibility represents a change from the comics.

TLDR MCU-only fans are not stupid for reading what was given to them in the text of the show they’re analyzing and coming up with a desire to have Bucky choose the name White Wolf as an alias. The choice to incorporate comics in your reading of an mcu property is a *choice* that is value-neutral and not a necessary step for either consumption or commentary.

[anonymousfiction211]

Meeting Tom Hiddleston

Summary: Meeting Tom Hiddleston for the first time! (A girl can dream...)

Word Count: 3502 words

Warnings: Smut

The line moved slowly. You were already waiting for a very long time, but it would definitely be worth it. Luckily, you were not alone. Your best friends Eline and John were with you, who happened to be in a relationship with each other. This was your fist time at comic con, since none of your other friends ever wanted to go. And you were extremely nervous to see your favourite actor in real life. Finally, the line moved a few paces. The more the line moved the more nervous you got. You were about to be eye to eye with him. With possibly the most charming and handsome men on the planet.

You were wondering if he would be in a good mood, or would pretend to be in a good mood. He had been giving out autographs for a few hours. Since your friends wanted to go to another panel first, you barely made it in time to stand in line. You had thought long and hard about what you wanted him to sign. Eventually you decided on a book about Loki, which you have read quite a few times. It was not about the Loki that he played, the Marvel version, but the one from the Norse mythology. Your thoughts were disturbed when Eline let out a little shriek. ‘I can’t believe we’re finally going to meet him!’ she said excited. The two of you had planned this a few years back, when you both discovered that you were massive Loki fans. The deal was, if Tom Hiddleston ever came to your country, the two of you would go.

‘Oh my god, I’m so nervous. I don’t know what to say’ you replied. From the moment you had tickets to this event you were thinking about what to tell him. Everything you came up with sounded like a cliché, and he sure would be tired to hear the same thing for the hundredth time today. After some sleepless nights and driving yourself crazy, you thought you would come up with it while waiting in line. Well, you couldn’t be more wrong. Now that you were standing in line, you had forgotten every series and every movie you had ever seen him in. You knew he was your favourite actor, but why that exactly was you couldn’t explain if your life depended on it.

The line moved along again and you were now next in line. The two girls before you were giggling loudly and you heard Tom chuckling. You started to feel overwhelmed and thought about backing out. ‘(Y/N), relax. It will be fine’ John encouraged you. ‘I don’t do well with first impressions and if I screw this up I will never be able to sleep’ you argued. Your friend just laughed at you. The three of you had have this argument about a million times when you discovered that you would meet Tom. The girls before you left and now you stood eye to eye to Tom Hiddleston. He made eye contact with you and your mind just lost it. You froze in your spot. John laid a hand on your shoulder and whispered to you ‘This is the part where we walk towards him’. From his tone you heard that he was quite amused by your state and you felt like you had embarrassed yourself already.

The three of you walked towards the table. ‘Hello there’ Tom greeted you. Your friends immediately greeted him back and started to introduce themselves. ‘.. and this is (Y/N)’ you heard Eline say. ‘Nice to meet you (Y/N)’ Tom said to you. God that voice was going to be the death of you. ‘What can I do for you today’ he continued. Your two friends gave him each a Loki funkopop to sign and after that you handed him the book. He eyed the book and looked at you. ‘Have you read it?’ he asked you. When he saw your questioning face he just laughed to himself ‘Sorry, of course you have. Stupid question’. Out of nervousness you laughed too ‘No, stupid questions don’t exist right?’ ‘I have read the book, one of my favourites actually’ you explained. ‘From all the books and stories, I’ve read about Loki, I quite agree’ he told you. ‘So, who do you like better MCU Loki or Norse Mythology Loki?’ he asked you. ‘Not to be insulting, but Norse Mythology Loki, actually’ you said, hoping he didn’t notice the blush on your cheeks. His face looked amused and you saw a twinkle in his eyes that confirmed your suspicion, that Tom and your all-time favourite trickster shared some qualities. ‘And why is that?’ he asked in his low voice while leaning a bit more forward.

‘Well, the Loki from Norse Mythology wouldn’t be stupid enough to try and kill Thanos with a butter knife’ you replied. You were shocked to hear yourself say that. The words had left your mouth before you even registered what was happening. Like you said, you really weren’t good in first impressions. You heard your friends laugh beside you. You were relieved when you heard Tom laugh also. ‘Sorry, I didn’t mean to insult you’ you quickly added. ‘You didn’t, darling’ he said. Great, if the blush on your cheeks wasn’t obvious, it sure would be now. ‘But remember, Loki does everything for a reason’ he said and gave you a wink. ‘I hope he does, I’m really excited for the series’ you said as steady as you could. Hoping you didn’t show how much that one wink effected you. ‘Glad to hear you say that. Do you want me to sign the cover or the inside?’ he asked you. A bit disappointed that after he signed it and you left this meeting, you would never see or speak to him again. ‘Inside, please’ you replied. Tom wrote something inside, but cut of the view with his arm. He closed the book and handed it back to you. ‘Best not to read it with your boyfriend standing next to you’ he said while handing it back to you.

Eline immediately grabbed John and pulled him closer. ‘Actually, John is my boyfriend. (Y/N) is single’ she said. The meaning behind her words couldn’t have been more obvious. If you could, you would have fainted right there and then, just to escape this embarrassment. You shot her an I’m-going-to-kill-you-for-this-look, but her look said that you would have done the same in her situation. And who were you kidding, you would have. ‘Really?’  Tom asked. The tone of his voice made your knees weak. ‘’Yeah, still wating for prince charming on his white horse, I guess’ you chuckled, not knowing how to respond to this. ‘Not for a skilled sorcerer with a God complex? Tom replied teasingly. ‘If Loki really existed I would take that chance’ you replied in all honesty. At this point the security guard behind Tom cleared his throat. ‘Mr. Hiddleston, we need to get going’ he said. Tom nodded at the security guard before turning his attention back to you. ‘Unfortunately, that is my que to get going. But I would love to explain to you why Loki tries to stab people with butter knifes. If you like?’ he said to you. You nodded quickly, more time with Tom was not something you would turn down. ‘Yes’ you said a bit too enthusiastic. Tom just laughed a little at your energetic reaction. He grabbed a piece of paper and wrote down the address and room number of his hotel ‘Here is the place I’m staying. Let’s say around 10pm if that’s not too late? I think it’s going to be a long day today. We can have a drink and talk more’ he said to you. ‘Your friends are more then welcome to join if they want’ he quickly added. You smiled at him ‘Sure, see you tonight’ you said. With that the three of you left and Tom got up to go to his next event.

‘Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god’ your friend started to chant once the three of you were in the main hall. ‘I can’t believe that he asked you out!’ she exclaimed. You furrowed your brows ‘Look, I can’t believe either that he wants to spend more time with me. But it isn’t a date. I’m not going alone, you two will be there as well’ you answered. Your friend shot each other a look before the shifted their focus back on you. ‘You’re going alone’ the said simultaneously. ‘What? How about you two come with me for moral support like good friends are supposed to do?’ you asked them. ‘We are making you go alone so you can have some time with your all-favourite actor. Who knows what will happen when you two are alone’ John said to you. ‘That is what good friends are supposed to do’ Eline added with a smile. And you knew it didn’t matter how much you argued, you were going and you were going alone. 

The day passed and you had a blast with your friends. The nerves within you were building up about tonight tough. At the end of the day, you and Eline went shopping for an outfit for tonight. She insisted that you wore a dress, but you had successfully declined that. Dresses weren’t really much your thing and you didn’t want Tom to think that you were expecting or trying something. After all, it was just a talk about Loki, a drink and he even had invited your friends. Eventually, you found a pair of black jeans and a dark green t-shirt. It was a bit Loki styled, but your friend assured you that Tom would appreciate that.

In the evening => You got out of the cab and were more nervous when you saw the luxury of the hotel. Maybe you were a bit underdressed you thought. After a few deep breaths you mastered the courage to walk into the hotel. The man behind the desk eyed you and asked if he could do anything to help you. You knew that he was really asking what the hell you were doing here. You told him that you came to visit Tom in room 325. After a quick phone call, he smiled politely at you, explained how to get there, and told you to have a nice evening. You got into the elevator and pressed the button for the third floor. You took a few more deep breaths. Maybe you should have brought something you started to contemplate. Why hadn’t you thought about that before? When the elevator reached the floor, your breath hitched when Tom was standing suddenly in front of you. Amused by your reaction he greeted you politely. To your shock he even hugged you once you were out of the elevator. ‘Are you alone?’ he asked you while walking towards his hotel room. ‘Yeah, my friends rather wanted a quiet night alone’ you lied to him. I mean, you couldn’t possibly tell him why you were here alone. ‘That just means we have the chance to get each other better’ Tom replied.

Tom’s hotel room was pretty big. It was still a simple hotel room but he had a large sitting area with comfy couch and a tv. He told you to make yourself at home, so you sat down on the couch. ‘Sorry, I didn’t think to bring something’ you said to him. He just told you that you didn’t had to bring something. He asked you what you wanted to drink. Luckily for you he had wine, maybe alcohol would calm your nerves a bit. He poured two classes of red wine and sat next to you on the couch. You noticed that he sat fairly close to you. Something you both love and hated at the moment. ‘I like the colours you’re wearing, very Loki-like’ he said to you. ‘Thanks’ you blushed, not knowing how to take this compliment. Luckily, Tom changed the subject about Loki and the Marvel Universe. After some time, your nerves calmed down and you actually had a blast. It was fun to talk to Tom about Loki, hobby’s, and he even took an interest is your life. When Tom handed you a glass with only a little wine in it he said ‘Sorry, I’m afraid that the second bottle is already gone’. You were shocked ‘The SECOND?’  you asked him. He just laughed at you ‘Time flies when you’re having fun I guess’. That is when you looked at the clock. It was past 1 o’clock at night. ‘Oh shoot, it’s already late. Sorry. I should go’ you stammered a bit. ‘No apologies, I’ve had a great time. And do you really think I’m letting a woman go home alone at this time at night?’ he said while raising his eyebrow.

‘Assuming from your tone, I guess not?’ you replied. ‘You’re staying here. You can have the bed and I’ll sleep on the couch if you want to. But I’m not letting you travel alone at this time’ he said. You saw him think over his words ‘I mean, if you really want I will take you home. I don’t want you to feel forced to stay here’ he added. You already heard your friends voice in your head telling you what an idiot you were if you actually went home right now. And to be honest, you didn’t want to go home. Things with Tom felt naturally. ‘If you don’t mine I’d like to stay for the night’ you said and immediately saw Tom’s face lit up. ‘But either we sleep both in the bed or I’ll sleep on the couch. I’m not having you sleep on the couch in your own room’ you added. It was a bold move, but the alcohol made you forget all your nerves. Tom just gave you a wide grin ‘Bed it is’ he said to you. The two of you talked and laughed more and eventually finished the wine. Tom had put his arm on the armrest around you and you sat to face him. The two of you sat really close to each other. When you put down the glass you looked in his eyes. He met your gaze and there was a long silence. His hand cupped your cheek and he leaned in ‘Can I?’ he asked while maintaining eye contact. ‘Yes’ you replied to give him your consent. You felt his lips on your, it was soft and he kissed you slowly.

When you kissed him back the kissing got more heated. Tom grabbed your waist to pull you closer and you laid your hands around his neck. After a make out session that made you feel like you were a teenager again, he broke the kiss. ‘Should we go to the bedroom?’ he asked you while catching his breath. You nodded and he laughed at you. He got up and stretched out his hand for you to take. You took his hand and he led you to his bedroom. When you entered he closed the door behind you. He immediately starting to kiss you again while walking you back to the giant bed. While you were walking you started to undo the many buttons of his white shirt. Once they were all unbuttoned, your hands roamed his chest and his abbs. You felt Tom slightly moan at your touch. He pulled the shirt of himself and you felt the back of your legs against the bed. Tom laid you down gently and grabbed the hem of your shirt. You moved your arms up so he could take it off you. For a moment he froze and eyed the sight of you laying underneath him on the bed in your bra. You chuckled at his reaction and pulled him closer for a kiss.

You undid his belt and opened his pants. He slides his pants down and was now laying on top of you in nothing but his underwear. You clearly felt his erection against your core, making you more wet. Tom unhooked your bra and started to kiss down your neck. When he reaches your breasts, he took his time. He started to kiss them, bite them, and roll his tongue around your nipples. Your nipples hardened and you moaned shamelessly from his actions. Once he was satisfied he trailed his kissing downwards. He reached the top of your pants. He looked up to make eye contact with you, while he undid the button of your pants. He hooked his fingers from the top and pulled your pants and underwear down simultaneously. ‘I wanted to do this the first moment I saw you’ he said to you. His tongue was circling your clit, but his eyes never left your gaze. The sight of Tom between your thighs looking at you was adding to the intensity of the pleasure he was giving you. When you were starting to pant from his tongue you saw him smile.

He trailed his kissing back upward and reached your mouth. You could taste yourself on him, which was adding to your lust. You took charge and moved so Tom was on his back. You slowly trailed his underwear down and he shuddered in anticipation. He quickly pulled open his nightstand and grabbed a condom. He handed it to you. You grabbed his hardened cock and he moaned immediately when you touched it. Slowly you started to move your wrist up and down and Tom was bucking his hips to create more friction. After some time, Tom was all worked up ‘Please (Y/N), ride me’ he begged you. You opened the condom package with your teeth and slowly put the condom around his cock. You startled his legs, grabbed his cock, and slowly let him enter you. You started out the same slow pace when you teased him with your hand. Tom grabbed your hips to increase the pace. You leaned downwards to kiss his neck and discovered his sweet spot. When you kissed the crook of his neck he almost yelled. ‘Oh god (Y/N)’ he said loudly. You were still riding him and gasping for air. He hit all the right spots and it felt so good to have him inside of you. You felt his hands trail down to your lower back and he carefully laid you on your back.

He was on top of you and thrusting faster inside of you. He tried the kiss you but the two of your were moaning uncontrollably. At this point you were more breathing each other in then actually kissing, but you loved every second of it. The way his breath felt on your skin, his lips ghosting over yours and his tongue occasionally sliding in your mouth. Suddenly a wave of pleasure flooded over you and you came hard crying out his name ‘O god Tom!’ you screamed. You laughed when you saw the smug look on his face. You grabbed his ass and squeezed it. He began to moan out loud again. His thrusts were getting wilder and you knew he was close. After a few more thrusts he thrusted one more time as deep as he could. He grunted loudly and stayed in that position for a few seconds. After that he collapsed on top of you, but supported himself a bit to make sure he didn’t crush you. Once he caught his breath he moved to his side of the bed. He went to the bathroom to get rid of the condom and after that you went to clean yourself. When you came back Tom laid in bed, waiting for you with a large grin on his face.

You crawled into the bed and he immediately pulled you close to him. The two of you cuddled in silence for a while and you felt yourself become sleepy. ‘So, what are your plans tomorrow?’ he asked you. ‘I am going with my friends to a museum, then some sightseeing and at the night we grab a bit to eat and go out you replied. ‘What are you going to do?’ you asked. He sighed loudly ‘Oh, well. I fly back in three days and in the meantime I have time to kill, but don’t know anybody here. It sure would be lovely to spend a day like that in your company’ he said a bit too obvious while pulling you close. ‘Are you trying to invite yourself?’ you giggled. ‘Hm.. maybe I am. Would you mind that?’ he asked you. ‘No, you are more then welcome to join us. I just thought that after tonight you maybe didn’t want to’ you replied. His face nuzzled in the crook of your neck ‘Darling, the first thing I’m going to do tomorrow is ask your phone number, because I really like to see you again’ he whispered. And with that you fell asleep.

Tags: @delightfulheartdream​

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[doctorofmagic]

My thoughts on What If... Doctor Strange Lost His Heart Instead of His Hands?

The very title of the episode sends a shiver down my spine. And this is where we’re going to start.

~ long post under the cut ~

A year ago, I wrote this post as an attemp to dive into one of the most important traits in Doctor Strange’s personality: love. Stephen is a being made of love, made to love, no matter which interpretation you have when you watch Infinity War. If you don’t read comic books, you’ll understand the moment you meet Donna. You’ll begin to understand how her death reshaped his entire subjectivity out of fear of failing, being powerless and unable to control everything around him (especially death), thus the arrogant and yet a disaster of a man we all know.

Where do I even start? Stephen loved her sister deeply and felt responsible for her death. And then, slowly, he also lost his parents and his brother. He fell in love with Clea but he also pushed her away. He loved Zelma platonically and lied to her, which was enough for them to break their bond. He felt attracted to Kanna but screwed things up, even though they remain friends. He was forced to kill the Ancient One, the only father figure he had ever since his father died. And lastly, the only person who would never leave his side... also left. Yes, even Wong. Stephen has SO much love to give but he’s also afraid because he’s cursed. He truly believes his love in poison. And would you look at that? What If really delivered a story where this is actually true.

What If Doctor Strange Lost His Heart Instead of His Hands?

The level of understanding when it comes to the character is... inconceivable. What could possibly reshape Stephen into following a dark path but love? The very premise of the whole episode. This is so much more than a love letter. This is literally too much, in all senses.

Fine, let’s begin.

What if the best of intentions has very strange consequences?

No. You used the word “strange” for the pun but this is not the word. Nah-ah. I’d go with ATROCIOUS, for starters. Things are gonna escalate so quickly, my friends.

Seriously, tho? Christine is SO SO SO SO beautiful, they’re so cute together. I have this feeling that MCU!Stephen was quite toxic because of his arrogance and this is why they didn’t work out. But WhatIf!Stephen???????? He’s always praising her, teasing her in a healthy way, respecting her and listening to her. HE TRULY LOVES HER, I’M GONNA CRY ALL OVER AGAIN, PLEASE, NOT THE CRÈME BRÛLÉE, PLEASE

I’m going to leave this shot here because we need to go back to it later. Hold that thought.

And bonus points to “Yeah, well, I would call that quite remarkable.” / “Well, I would say the same about you.”

GODS. THE PAIN. STOP THE PAIN.

So in this reality, Stephen didn’t caused the car accident because he was checking his phone while driving. Also it was not the reckless attempt to pass the truck. Well, maybe it was the consequence of this act? The fact is, the car behind them loses control, which makes them crash. Does it matter? We’ll learn later that no, it doesn’t.

And yep... Christine dies. Have you noticed the shattered heart? Ah, the pain only gets better and better.

Again, Stephen blames himself. More than anything, this is so important because Stephen is all about guilt. We still need to meet Donna so we can add yet another layer of guilt. But the feeling exists. This is what corrupts Stephen’s heart and soul in all his iterations. This is what makes him the character I love so much. I love this SO. MUCH. In addition, his stubbornness to accept his condition. Man won’t take a no. This, this is Doctor Strange in character. Stop complaining about NWH Stephen, it’s pathetic.

Okay, “grief-stricken”, Stephen found the Mystic Arts and became a sorcerer. That’s when he learned about the Time Stone, the Eye of Agamotto and Dormammu. Nothing changes, he saves the universe. But time does not heal his deepest wound.

I love Wong so much. Every time Wong does something, the world is healed. Really. We’re going back to him as well but for now I’ll just leave this shot.

BUT STEPHEN, DOING SOMETHING RECKLESS? HE’D NEVAH

Aaaaaaaannnnnnd then he did.

He goes back in time. It’s been two years since he lost Christine. I think he reacted pretty nicely, despite the circumstances. Now let’s go back to that shot I said I was saving for later.

Stephen is so light-hearted here. Also, during the first time he lost Christine, he had no idea what “The Price is Right” was. He knows now, which means he probably tried to learn more about the show because of her, because of grief. HAHAHA MORE PAIN

AND THEN HE

AND THEN SHE DIES AGAIN

AND THEN HE KEEPS GOING BACK IN TIME

AND SHE KEEPS DYING

AND THE MUSIC

AND HIS VOICE

AND HE TRIES TO CHANGE FATE BUT IT CAN’T BE AVERTED

HE EVEN TRIES TO STAY AWAY FROM HER LIFE BUT SHE DIES ALL THE SAME, WHY

AND EVERY TIME THEY CRASH, HE FEELS THE PHYSICAL AND EMOTIONAL PAIN AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN, WHY

I’M-- *ugly sobbing noises*

Apparently, not.

And this scene when he simply... closes his eyes before she dies again...?

This is where this episode had me in endless tears. It got me the four times I watched it. I’m dead serious.

Okay, so, next the Ancient One appears to Stephen, explaining that Christine’s death is an Absolute Point in time. It cannot be changed. Stephen needs the accident to become the Sorcerer Supreme and defeat Dormammu.

And this is where Stephen starts his journey into darkness. “Nothing is impossible, you taught me that. I only require more power.” Disobeying the Ancient One, Stephen then travels in time, seeking the Library of Cagliostro. Now, if you’re not aware of that, Cagliostro was a sorcerer who studied time in comics, and later became Sise-Neg (there’s a recent post on this because of the new Defenders run). It’s funny to think that Sise-Neg also destroyed the world when he became a god, however he grew past his pettiness and remade reality. Stephen did not possess such power, as we’re about to see.

PS: “Stop torturing yourself, Stephen.” Naur but he should use this line like a mantra. Especially comics!Stephen.

Not gonna lie, tho. This place reminds me of the Temple of the Vishanti from T&T (of course I was going to insert T&T somewhere, it’s me).

And of course they’d go for a pun with his name haha. I don’t know how to feel about this, tho. I feel like the episode is too heavy and dark for comedy. But it is what it is.

Okay but why some books are in cages??????????? And wow, it seems Cagliostro also gathered knowledge about several fields of magic.

And then Stephen learns that, in order to break an Absolute Point, he needs to absorb more power. This is when I went “oh-oh, here we go”.

And for real, is this Shuma-Gorath? Why are they keeping his name a secret? Is this the same creature from the first episode with Captain Carter, right? RIGHT? It has to be Shuma-Gorath.

Of course he tries to be polite and ends up all hurt haha. O’Bengh warns him about love but he will not listen. “Love can break more than your heart. It can shatter your mind.”/ “Is she worth the pain?”. Please, this is Stephen. He eats pain for breakfast.

Also, also, let’s take a break. We’re finally going to get monsterf0cker tentacle-lover Stephen Strange. It will cost us everything but here we goooooooooooo (yes, I went frame by frame for your more obscure fanservice needs)

Gods, I love this sequence so much it hurts. Okay, here we go.

Shmebulock???????????

AND HE STOLE THE CAPE??????????? AND DREW THE LINE ON BUGS??????

The grasp this man is holding on me right now...

Some of you will understand. I’m with you.

And here are the grostesque ones. These are hard to take SS but I had to.

Animation, sound effects, OST? CHEF’S KISS TO ALL

And lastly... the tentacles. Yeah, if you’re new... this is a thing.

Fanservice. Fanservice everywhere. (low-key the reason I also waited to write this review, I wanted to enjoy this part so badly but I was too sad for that lmao)

Okay so. O’Bengh is suddenly OLD and DYING, until we realize that Stephen spent CENTURIES absorbing mystic beings. CENTURIES. WTF STEPHEN. He had nothing in mind but the goal to save Christine. And people wonder why he went insane???? I’m sorry, O’Bengh, but I can’t take you serious when you still call Stephen Sorcerer Armani. Oh, and also because you watched him absorb beings for centuries in silence lmao. But I guess I have to because you said that Stephen is split in two since the Ancient One cast a spell on him, splitting the timelines and making them exist in the same reality before he could travel back in time. I know, it’s complex. Anything for the plot.

And now good!Stephen has an evil!twin who wants to absorb him back in order to become whole and break the Absolute Point. Cool.

I said I wanted to talk more about Wong because I think people are not talking about him enough. Wong is so important in this episode. He’s the one who’s trying to heal Stephen after Christine. He’s Stephen’s anchor.

Also, THEY FINALLY USED A SPELL WITH THE NAME OF THE VISHANTI. HOORAAAAY

So, for the sake of our understanding, I’m addressing the characters as evil and good!Stephen. Let’s go. Evil!Stephen summons good!Stephen and gods, he still holds such a strong grasp on me... unbelievable. THE DEEPER VOICE BENEDICT USES???? PLEASE, DIDN’T WE HAVE ENOUGH?

Imagine his strength to hold so many beings inside him, fighting to control him. BRO, THIS IS TOO TOO MUCH

Fine, I’ll not post SS about the fight because I’d be here all night long but I WILL say this: NOT CLOAKIE!!!!! NAAAAAAAAAAUR

Also if you ask me if I recognize any of the spells? Maaaaybe the Flames of Faltine, the not-so-crimson Bands of Cyttorak and a little trick Magik does with her portals. That’s how far I go.

I’ll not comment on the “seducing yourself to stay in the trap”. I will not. I’ll just say that the first person Stephen thought of when “Christine” was talking about the crème brûlée was Wong. That’s it.

And finally evil!Stephen absorbs good!Stephen and releases... UNLIMITED POWER (I love when the stone goes red as if it was bleeding aaaaaaa)

I can fix him...

This scene here? Poetic cinema. (I love his wings so much)

And when Stephen says her name and the other monsters’ voices echo “Christine”, AAAAAACKKKK

AND OF COURSE CHRISTINE WOULD FREAK OUT, BRO. LOOK AT WHAT YOU’VE BECOME BECAUSE OF YOUR TWISTED LOVE. I’M NOT DOING FINE.

Oh, but it’s too late anyways because Stephen broke reality haha. This scene is interesting because Stephen is the only one who sensed and/or talked to the Watcher until now. I read an interview that the Watcher kinda showed up but it’s also about Stephen’s keen senses. Bit of both, let’s say. Still, man, 616-Watcher is not that cold. 616-Watcher would watch this and say “how about I intervene anyway?”. WhatIf!Watcher is brutal.

The way Christine looks at Stephen one last time also KILLS ME, DESTROYS ME, BREAK ME INTO A MILLION PIECES.

And this is where my soul left my body.

This is how they end the episode. This is how you leave me speechless and with teary eyes. This is how you give me a whole existential crisis.

This... this was brutal to watch. Really.

What can I say after this? I’m used to reading painful things when it comes to Stephen. Aaron’s and Cates’ runs are heartbreaking on so many levels. Hickman’s New Avengers is not easier. Coincidentally, What If? Magik Became Sorcerer Supreme and The End. And now Death of Doctor Strange. And yet, after everything I’ve been through, I’d never expect to watch something so brilliant, so tragic, so heartbreaking and unexpected in the MCU. Never. This is top tier content and this is my favorite character with SO MANY LAYERS and SO MUCH UNDERSTANDING. I can’t put into words how meaningful this whole episode is to me, or how deep it touched my heart and soul.

I’ve been struggling to find the proper words since then, I still can’t. All I can add is, I cried for the 4th time now. This is too, too much, even for Stephen stans. Even for the ones who are used to pain, regardless of which media you’re into: comic books, live actions or animated movies. This is literally more than I can take and yet I’m so, so grateful. The voice acting, gods, how did Benedict manage to create a better Stephen than the one he’s literally playing in real life???????????? HOW

This episode really took the max potential Stephen had to offer as a character, added tons and tons of layers based on his grief, depression, arrogance and need to control everything and created a tragic masterpiece. In 7 years of being a Doctor Strange fan, I've never read or watch something that could go this deep into the character. The closest I can think of is Mr. Misery and the metaphor of Stephen's depression. This is a whole new level of respect and understanding. This is more than a love letter. This is peak maestry. It’s perfect, it’s heartbreaking, it’s... gods, I can’t.

Sorry for dragging you until this far. Before I wrap up this review, I just wanted to remind you all that Stephen will appear again, he will smile again, he will be surrounded by people again. So this is not the end. It was painful but be brave. We still have a few more steps to take.

[dendrite-blues]

Given the events of today, this seems an appropriate time to tell an embarrassing story about myself.

Me, 2 me:

It’s about Loki, and 2012 fandom, and growing older. In retrospect, I suppose it’s not actually that funny, but the irony is pretty strong.

The first MCU movie I saw was Avengers 1. I had never read a comic book or seen a super hero movie. I just happened to be in the common room of my dorm when a bunch of nerd bros were going to see it, and a good friend insisted that I had to see it.

I was ENTHRALLED the entire time. Start to finish. Every joke, every fight seen, all the characters being introduced and meeting each other. The hot ass villain that stone cold just WHACKED a guy with his cane and drilled some motherfucker’s eye out. Like WTF?!

My mind was blown. I opened AO3 on my phone in the car ride back, I couldn’t even wait to get home. Mind you, AO3 had only been started like... a year before that. It was baby. I got it so I could comment on some BNF’s Sherlock fics in 2010, but stopped using it until 2012 because there weren’t any fics on there. For real! there were like, maybe 100 fics on there when I joined. I remember telling my wife it was a cool idea, but it’d never work. No way would they get the whole fandom to leave FFN. LOL!!

But there were stories already popping up on premiere night. There were stories from visionaries who’d written shit before the movie even came out. Bless them, they made my entire week!

I thought Tony Stark was fucking incredible, so I looked up his ships. Fell into Science Boyfriends. Didn’t so much like Stony. Fell even harder for team fic and found family stuff.

I remember when Howard Stark’s A+ Parenting was first used. I vividly remember Tony Stark Has a Heart being coined and abruptly being tagged on EVERY SINGLE FIC for a week. Fun times.

Anyway, time passes. I moved into an apartment with 2 roommates and my (now) wife. We were all fujoshi, and conversation in our house would have be completely indiscernible to someone who didn’t know the fandom lingo.

We all go to see Age of Ultron together. It was a great time, but as a Tony/Bruce shipper I was understandably distressed by the sudden yeeting of Bruce from planet Earth and essentially removing my OTP from the entire 2nd Phase of the MCU.

“What the hell am I supposed to read now?” I wondered. 

I still don’t feel any flutters for Steve, Tony doesn’t know Bucky exists yet, and I’m still living with some intense internalized misogyny that prevents me liking any straight ships.

So my roommate, quite reasonably, mentions Frostiron.

And this is where the story gets embarrassing, because I immediately wrinkled my nose in confusion and went on a five minute, idiotic rant about what a dumb, weird-ass crack ship that was. Tony and Loki? Excuse you? What, is that some kind of “ship the two hot fandom heart throbs even though they have nothing in common” ship? He threw Tony out a window FFS? He’s a VILLAIN.

Queue the laugh track.

And my roommate, bless her, she was a total champion and a good friend and she just completely let me get away with it.

She shrugged and said, “Welp, sorry I mentioned it.” and life went on.

FLASH FORWARD SEVEN YEARS AND TWO EXISTENTIAL CRISES LATER

I’m now a 27 year old Hollywood washout whose lost my career, my apartment, and all of my friends in a matter of months. I’m back home in the Bible Belt with my homophobic parents and experiencing the most intense depression, self hatred, and gender dysphoria of my life.

I’ve been so busy working to keep my head above water as a film worker that I haven’t seen a movie I didn’t help make for six years. I have no fandoms, I don’t even know what’s popular anymore. I go looking for anything familiar, anything that can reconnect me to a time in my life when everything didn’t royally suck.

I go to the MCU.

Now, it’s important to note that when I was into MCU before I did not know I was on the trans spectrum, or the autism spectrum, or the asexual spectrum. I thought I was just another slash loving lesbian that really, really liked to cosplay men, and maybe felt a bit sad that I couldn’t be like that all the time, and also kind of wished I could be masculine without going through scary, expensive surgeries, and OH MY GOD I’M NOT CIS OH MY GOD.

Ahem. So. I was processing that at the same time as my life was utterly imploding.

And I found intersex Loki. I can’t overstate how important to my recovery Loki fic was at that time. They felt my struggles, they felt my confusion, they embodied gender in a way I could only dream of, physically changing genitals and all, AT WILL! Whenever they wanted! It was a powerful fantasy, and an escape from the reality of being gender non-conforming in a conservative state.

But I’m sure the irony has already occured to you at this point, you see my dillema. 

Because the options for intersex Loki shipping are, by and large, Frostiron and Thorki. 

Now I had always been intensely squicked by Thorki. My family follows a similar dynamic to the Allfamily, with me being the golden child and my sister being the scapegoat. So I was (and admittedly still am) incapable of reading that ship without thinking about my actual sister, and that’s not sexy.

Which left Frostiron.

[pause for reader to laugh at my shame]

I naturally fell into a deep obsession with the ship, reading the top 80 pages of fic in less than two months. I started writing my own when I ran out of the kind of Loki I craved. I projected so much of my pain and frustration and feelings of isolation onto them, and I even got support and appreciation from the fandom community! It was amazing, and not at all something I expected.

...but in my heart I always knew the truth.

I had dismissed the ship outright years earlier. I thought I knew better. I looked down on the shippers as Tumblr hoes that would ship anybody hot regardless of character. I thought that just because characters didn’t get along in canon that there was no reason to ship them. I thought that you couldn’t possibly write a good story based on one scene. I didn’t bother looking deeper into the characters to see their similarities.

So basically, I’m a giant hypocrite!

If there’s a moral to the story, I guess it’s to be suspicious of your biases and that you can always change your mind. Years have passed but I still look back on that conversation and cringe. 

The one mercy is that I didn’t do it on the internet, so there wasn’t a record. I was allowed to leave that childish arrogance in the past, known only to me and my faithful friend who has been kind enough not to mention it.

But in my true heart... in the back of my mind... I know the truth.

I was an anti of the ship I’ve now written 500k about. And now you all know too.

Thanks to anyone who read to the end! I hope it was at least a little entertaining. Let this be a warning to the youngins. Careful the things you say, you never know what the future holds. Don’t be a clown like me!

[monicawoe]

Venom: Let There Be Carnage (review)

non spoilery review:

10/10 Would Recommend

3/10 Carnage (meaning there was about 30% Carnage and 70% Symbrock which are the exact proportions I was looking for!)

5/10 Plot (Was there one? Yes? Did it matter much? Not really!)

This movie was a real treat! I laughed almost the entire way through, and wasn’t bored once. It was 100% made for the Symbrock shippers.

Now mind you, there are plenty of logic flaws!  Like don’t watch this looking for high caliber storytelling! Watch it for Tom Hardy acting his insane ass off twice and doing everything he wanted to with both Eddie and Venom. 

Spoilery review beneath the cut!

This is a stream of consciousness review in no particular order because I came out bursting with joy:

The whole movie is an established relationship break up leading to a reunion / renewed confession of love romcom.

The movie ends with an honest to Klyntar out loud love confession from Venom to Eddie. There were so many comics Easter eggs and shoutouts but by far the greatest one was that ending scene which is one of my favorite panels in all Venom comics history. The two of them on a beach.  (Also the setting where Venom tells Eddie they love him). 

The speed drawing!!

Anne & Dan getting married! Just like in my fic. 

Venom telling Eddie “I’m sorry I can’t mend broken hearts.” OMFG

Also Sonny & Cher the chickens! And the fact that they later obediently stayed in their little three foot circle of grass.

Eddie, honey, that is NOT a $2,000 tv. That’s at most a $300 tv. 

Eddie pitifully cleaning his apartment and patching the holes and taking down the “No Eating People” sign. Woe.

Venom at the club! That lady screaming “I LOVE YOU!” at Venom may as well have been me. All the glow stick necklaces <333 Venom thinking Little Simz was calling them to the stage because she kept singing Venom. lol

Venom leaving a trail of corpses in their wake passing through hosts and nobody mentioning it. Oops?

Mrs Chen!!!  Mrs. Chen cradling and then hosting Venom (and presumably off screen eating mass quantities of chocolate). Omg. I’m so relieved both she and Dan survived this one.  And Dan with the fire save at the church lol.  

Even Carnage (who tbh I typically hate in the comics) was entertaining at least.  The backstory with Frances/Shriek made Cletus a more interesting character, but the movie also didn’t spend too much time on Carnage, it’s real focus was Eddie and Venom breaking up and getting back together. 

Other Easter eggs! 

Patrick Mulligan the cop is Toxin in the comics so clearly the ending was a set up for that. 

Shriek is still alive I’m sure. She was great, albeit underutilized so I’m hoping she’s in future movies.

Carnage got eaten hooray! 

The pregnancy storyline in the telenovela followed immediately by Eddie asking Venom if they were keeping any secrets made think of the Eddie/Venom pregnancy story in the comics and the birth of Sleeper. Is that coming?  Before this movie I would’ve said no fucking way but if we can get a love confession on the beach, that rave scene, no less than five scenes that could’ve easily come right from fic then maybe pregnant Eddie/Venom isn’t entirely impossible.  

The ONE thing I truly didn’t like and in this case was glad I was spoiled about was the end of the mid credits scene with them shifting to another universe with Spider-Man. Purely because I don’t want the MCU anywhere near Venom! They’re far too controlling and no homo to let Venom and Eddie be so full of love for each other and so bonkers. However! If all this means is one cameo for Venom and Eddie in the upcoming Spider-Man movie I guess that’s okay. Still. Sigh .

But other than that it gets two shiny symbiote thumbs way way up from me, enjoy!