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#this is very mundane stuff I have had going on but I have done a lot of things I've thought about doing lately
tsukii0002 · 2 days
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Imagine the contrast of the coexistence between Mc and Solomon, a human who did not know that magic was real until relatively recently and another human who has lived for centuries and who uses magic as if it were breathing.
Imagine that little things at home where Solomon is always willing to use magic to solve it, while Mc always beats him to it in the most common and least magical way possible.
But above all imagine, Solomon's frustration, how can his magic be rendered useless in such a way? And if he has no magic, what can he bring to that home?
Solomon: Remember that blanket I told you had a hole in it, I think it's time to mend it *opening one of his books*
Mc: I've already mended it, with a few stitches it's as good as new.
Solomon: Oh…
Solomon: Mc, what was the table that was broken?
Mc: Oh, don't worry, I fixed it.
Solomon: Really? What spell did you use?
Mc: Ha, ha, Solomon, you don't need magic to wedge a table.
Solomon: Mc!! With this spell we will solve our rat problem!
Mc: *smiling* I've already taken care of that, no for nothing Barbatos is so happy with me.
Solomon: That's how you earn your premium tea leaves?
Solomon: Please tell me you didn't fix the shelf that was sagging *with a book under his arm*
Mc: *eating a muffin* Oops.
Solomon: Mc, I told you I'd fix it *pointing at the. with the book*
Mc: Solomon, it was tightening two screws, it's going to take you longer to look up such a mundane spell than to fix it manually.
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Solomon: Mc… you're a sorceress, you should use magic more!
Mc: *funny* And you should use magic less!!! You're still a human, old man. By the way, remember those yellow spots on the tablecloth that bothered you so much?
Solomon: Yeah?
Mc: Well, I've already made them disappear and without magic.
Solomon: How????
Solomon is sitting, somewhat annoyed, on one of the balconies
Mc: Hey…
Solomon: …
Mc: Are you upset?
Solomon: … No.
Mc: *sighing as they stands next to him* Let's talk, tell me, why does it bother you so much that I solve things without magic?
Solomon: I'm not upset, we don't need to talk at all.
Mc: You know that communication is part of living together right? We are two people with different ways of living, if we don't talk how are we going to have a good cohabitation?
Solomon: … With the brothers you never had that problem.
Mc: Sure I have, maybe not with these things because Lucifer encourages certain stuff to be done manually, but we had to set a lot of guidelines when I started living with them.
Solomon: ...
Solomon: *sighing* I'm not upset… it's just that I'm used to doing everything with magic, even the smallest things, it's easier, faster.
Mc: Well, sometimes yes, but sometimes it's easier to do it without magic, and in my case I'm used to not use magic.
Solomon: *looking at them* I know, but there are things I can't do without magic.
Mc: But that's what I'm for, isn't it?
Solomon: *doubting* Then' what do I bring to our cohabitation?
Mc: *realizing*
Solomon: You cook, you do a lot of chores because you are faster, and you take care of a lot of things that allow you to have a routine… I feel that instead of living together, I am a guest...
Mc: Solomon...
Solomon: And if I can't even use my magic, Am I useless? without my magic I…
The two are silent for a moment
Mc: I'm sorry, I've minimized how you feel… and I've done things my way without taking you into account.
Solomon: Ha, ha, don't worry, *now kind of sad* It's not that big of a deal.
Mc: No, I told you, communication is part of living together and you should tell me what bothers you.
Solomon: *looking at them*
Mc: We can try to find a middle ground.
Solomon: How?
Mc: *thoughtful* Well, the day to day things we can do manually and the things that are very difficult or tedious we can use magic?
Solomon: *considering it seriously'* You could also teach me how to do tasks without magic, like how to wedge a table… and I could teach you spells that I usually use, like the one that sweeps the house by itself.
Mc: *smiling* We can also make a schedule so we don't step on each other's to-dos.
Solomon: *smiling too* And create a chat room exclusively for house stuff where we can let each other know if we're going to do something.
Mc: That sounds like a great idea Solomon.
Solomon: *more lively* And I'd also like to do certain chores together, like laundry or cooking.
Mc: … *feeling bad at Solomon's happy face* Yes… we can do that too.
.
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This turned out to be longer than I thought, and what started as something funny has turned into a drama😅. I'm not going to lie to you, I love domestic dramas, day to day problems… so this post has turned into that because Solomon is used to live in a very different way than Mc, and living together for the first time is always complicated and habits are hard to change, and co-living is not always so great. Give me domestic situations between Mc and the rest of the cast please!!!! 🥺🥺
Anyway, if you've made it this far, thank you very much for reading🩷
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I kind of miss getting to know the interior of other people’s homes. So many of my friendships in adulthood are distant, or long distance/only talking over the phone, difficult to make actual plans with because of Real Life Schedules Now, etc. etc., but like in school and stuff as a kid you can just hang out at someone’s house for a few days, have a sleepover every weekend, etc. etc. I still remember the interior of all of my childhood friend’s homes, I remember all the details to the rooms and the layout of the yards and etc. etc. There’s just something kind of neat about Knowing another person’s housing space, what the décor says about them, the history of how they came to live there and their household routines and what it’s like, etc. I feel like it can be an important part of really deeply understanding someone so it’s weird to talk to and vaguely know a handful of people, but also not even know what their bedrooms look like or how they organize the dishes after washing them or etc. etc. 
#'intrictae knowledge of another person in an extremely mundane way' my beloved#i also just really love looking at interiors like I'm fascinated with how people decorate their own spaces or what they have aorund#in the environment and what it says about them. Does anyone else snoop the backround of photos and videos and stuff?#like if theres a youtube video or a picture or something anyone posts and it has like a candid normal indoor space as the background#I'll pause or zoom in or whatever and really try to look around. see what's there. just make observations#not in a crerrpy way but just like.. idk I feel like it Says Something. I also love seeing people's computer desktops and phone screens#amnd looking at how they organize their apps or files or what aesthetic they give things. If I'm wathing someone play a game and they#accidentally exit to the desktop or something I always pause and try to see whatever I can glean from it lol#Bedrooms. Phone screens. Desktop of a computer. Also real life desk top that the computer is sitting on. etc. These are all spaces that are#mostly organized by and utilized by really just the ONE person themselves. like nobody else is going to usually be using your#computer or your bedroom nightstand. it's your space that you don't have to think about anyone else interacting with so they way you organiz#e and decorate it is very personal and Just For You. something about spaces like that are so interesting to me like in telling#little tiny details about someone and stuff. And also on a borader scale I just love thinking about how like. you could give 5 people the#same exact space and each of them would organize it and decorate it completely differently. and all of it would be an indication of their#tastes and personality and lifestyle. I used to want to be an apartment complex maintenace man because I would get to enter into everyone's#identical layout apartments and see how different they all are and what variety of things people have done to customize the same space#and what it might say about them or etc. etc. etc. Also probably weird but sometimes when throwing something away#I'll look at people's trash a little like if I'm in a realative;s house. which literally gives no important information but I love little#details like 'oh someone in the house had a snickers bar earlier today.' 'oh they bought a lightbulb I wonder which of the lightbulbs#went out' and then I look around the house at the shapes of the light fixtures or if there are any other clues (like a screwdriver or#ladder nearby) to see which one it is or etc. etc. ANYWAY .. idk..#one of my Big Fascinations. I just love seeing people's personal spaces and knowing little obscure mundane details that#dont matter really but it Matters To Me just because I love gathering every miniscule tidbit of data about anything in any situation#whether it's relevant or not. seek knowledge just for knowledge's sake I guess lol. Maybe thats an enneagram type 5 thing or something#else lol. ANYWAY.. thought about this because I have such a strong compulsion to ask everyone I know like long distance friends#for pictures of their bedrooms and phone screens and desktops but also for people who don't have the same Weird Interest In Interios#*Interiors and stuff that I do I feel like that just comes off extremely freakish ghbjhbb#I PROMISE IM NOT GATHERING DATA ON YOU! or like.. I am. but not maliciously. just in a manner of earnest detached intellectual fascination
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silly-mode-cilia · 1 year
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hi I like yelling silly little life updates into the silly little void so here we go
I'm leaving for my internship thing on Monday (slay) and my last three weeks have consisted of 1. Finals (best semester since i started college thank u curves and nice teachers for boosting me), 2. Socializing, 3. Medical appointments (my eyes have gotten worse but I'm good otherwise) and 4. Prepping for my trip
And. This past week. I have had a cold, of all things, which is not good timing because I'm trying to finalize and get stuff done and was not understanding why I couldn't focus AND I was on my period but now it's a bit better I have entered the "expelling fluids" phase where I feel fine but the symptoms persist. Chilling.
So trip prep has included setting up my new laptop because the other broke during finals week, the keyboard started malfunctioning and the repair date was past when I would leave so new laptop ended up being the only option (which is nice) but I have to manually set up all my bookmarks still because I forgot my Firefox sync password and that will take a couple hours probably (last I went through and organized them it took a whole day)
And then excessive amounts of laundry that are still not done, realizing I lack more than 1 field work outfit and having to go to REI too many times to finish the pack list. Although a closet clean out was done and I'm satisfied with where the personal style development is headed I like my clothes.
But that's done so now I just have to. Pack.
And then my travel request for a conference got approved (!!) When it was expected to take until like, July so now I'm trying to finalize and coordinate stuff earlier than expected! But that is welcome that is good.
And I also got accepted to Job B which doesn't actually pay but is very few hours so I'm doing the tutoring and the mentoring both and hopefully not going insane! Might drip volunteering if I need to which reminds me I need to email them! okay!
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charliemwrites · 9 months
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Bark bark bark awoooo
No content warnings
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You’re gonna fucking combust.
Somehow, someway, this is Johnny’s fault. You’re not sure how yet, so he it isn’t fair for him to be in trouble, but you know it.
“This is your fault,” you tell him, pouting in bed — bare ass naked, but that means nothing to him, he’s a dog. He cocks his head, and you wave your (broken) vibrator at him. “I don’t know how, but it is. Is this because I wanna chop your balls off?”
His mouth closes, eyes big - like he actually understands you. In your horny delirium, you almost believe he really does.
You flop onto your back with a sigh, eyes a little wet with frustration.
It’s been two months since you last successfully got off. Your vibrator (and its replacement… and its replacement’s replacement) keep breaking, or running out of battery. The plug is defective or falls out of the socket.
Once you successfully got right to the edge - just for it to die. You almost did cry that time.
Sure, there’s your hand. But every time you try ol’ reliable a certain four-legged roommate interrupts one way or another. And when you tried to kick him out of the room, and then ignored the howling, scratching, and general drama - there was loud and rapid knocking at your door.
Like fucking clockwork. If you get anywhere at all, you never get to finish.
It wouldn’t be so bad, either. Your libido isn’t anything crazy, you don’t think. At least it wasn’t before. But now there’s Soap.
Soap who you should not be so attracted to. Who has no sense of propriety or boundaries, who murmurs the dirtiest things to you in the most public and otherwise mundane places. And he just keeps. Showing. Up.
Like he’s got a tracker on you or something. (You’ve checked, he doesn’t.)
He’s like every guilty fantasy you had as a good, studious girl back in high school. The kind of guy to grab your thigh under your parents’ dinner table and take your virginity in the back of his car. Maybe corner you by the lockers between classes to kiss you silly and drive up your absence record.
You never actually went for those boys — and perhaps gratefully, they never went for you. In romance novels, it would be a quaint little coming of age story. The stuff to swoon over. But reality was a lot scarier for you, especially with your older sister always keeping an ear out to report back to your parents and… well, yeah.
You’ve always been a firm introvert, anyway. That’s why you live out in the woods with only a dog for regular company.
But Soap. Soap is some unholy amalgamation of those innocent, shy girl fantasies turned R-rated. Like the grown-up version of those cute YA novels.
And you have no defense for it — except distrust, that is.
Soft-hearted as you are, you know you don’t do casual well. And you know that guys like Soap just like to spin you up and up until you finally give in, think the dreaded words “maybe it’ll work out” despite that rational voice in your head saying, “don’t bet on it.”
Doesn’t stop you from secretly wanting him though.
Fear is the only thing keeping you in check now. Some of it for you own feelings; of getting invested in a guy that has done nothing but treat you like a prime cut of meat. The rest of it is a genuine concern that he might be a bit dangerous. He’s so much bigger than you, visibly stronger. Has gone out of his way to make you uncomfortable (doesn’t matter that a very dark and slutty part of you liked it) and ignored your attempts at brushing him off.
Fear, unfortunately, is beginning to add to the temptation.
“I’m not going to do it,” you tell yourself, or maybe Johnny. Soap’s contact is on the screen. You don’t remember putting it into your phone, but you must have at some point. “Nope. No way.”
You slide a sideways look at Johnny, tail wagging at a steady clip.
“He’s probably a former frat boy or something, right?” you muse.
Snort.
“No, you don’t think so?” you question, sitting up. He happily crawls into your lap when you pat your thighs, chin resting on your tummy. “Nah, you’re right. Could almost imagine him beating the hell out of one for pissing him off.”
A little grumbly noise. You smile and start petting absently over his head and ears, phone forgotten now.
“This is dumb anyway,” you sigh, head tilted back to the ceiling. “You don’t like men. I couldn’t bring him back here.”
Johnny’s ears flick. You giggle and start flopping them around, making airplane noises. Eventually he huffs and starts licking at your face until you stop, complaining that you’ll need to wash off now.
“Fuck it.”
Johnny picks his head up, staring at you as you run a hand down your face.
“Fuck it all. I’m going to a bar. I’m getting… I dunno. Laid or something.” Thank god it’s only Johnny here. You don’t think you could live with the embarrassment of someone else hearing the way you talk.
You set your hands on your hips, nod to yourself.
“And if it happens to be Soap, then… sign from the universe, right?” You grimace a bit, striding for your bedroom. “Please don’t let him be a murderer or something…”
For once, Johnny is perfectly behaved as you get ready. He doesn’t try to lick at you when you come out of shower (freshly shaved and lotioned and everything). Sits patiently on the bed as you pick through your closet, even noses at a pretty pink dress you rarely wear but were considering for this.
He doesn’t try to bump your arms or hands while you do your makeup, just watches attentively. You choose a pretty, matching bra-panty set, apply a light spritz of perfume. Hesitate over jewelry.
“Is it normal to wear jewelry when you plan on fucking?” you wander allowed.
A little “boof” from the bed. You’ll take that as a yes.
You decide on a set of faux pearls with a gold heart pendant in the center. Not quite a choker, but high enough on your throat to suggest one. A delicate bracelet, a pair of stud earrings, and you’re just about set.
“Christ, I hate doing this alone,” you mutter, fumbling with the zip on the back of the dress.
Lastly, the shoes.
“Fuck it,” you say again. Your mantra for the evening, apparently. Wobble into a pair of heels, a bow on the outside of each ankle where you buckle them.
You pause when you’re done, giving yourself a once over in the full length mirror. Pleased with what you see. Coquettish and pretty, not necessarily bombshell sexy maybe, at least not on first glance. But the necklace, the heels, the cutouts at the waist of your dress… it’s all exactly what you wanted.
“Alright,” you breathe, tummy swooping with excitement. “I can do this… right?”
Johnny’s gotten down off the bed, is keeping a respectful distance. You appreciate it, don’t want to have to lint roll hair off yourself.
“Oh, god. What if he’s bad?” You ask, giving him a horrified look. “What if he’s been, like, compensating?”
To your shock, he stomps his paw and starts damn near howling. Carrying on and on like he’s bitching you out. You blink in shock, almost laugh — then check the time.
“Oh! Don’t worry, baby. I won’t let you starve!”
You toddle off to the kitchen and prep his dinner, scrunching your nose at the raw chicken and beef liver. He grumbles and fusses the whole way, making you laugh as you pretend to have a whole conversation about the economy with him.
“Okay, bonnie Johnny,” you coo, setting his bowl down. “Be good, okay? If I bring someone back here please don’t eat them, okay?”
More grumbles and whines and growls. You roll your eyes, blow him a kiss, and slip out the door.
You tell yourself you just need action with someone. Don’t admit to yourself that there’s really a specific someone you’re hoping to see.
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ironunderstands · 5 months
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Yapping about why I love Aventio and what I feel makes it a great ship 
(If you hate it I urge you to read this, because you don’t have to agree with me, but I want you to get where Aventio shippers are coming from at least)
I’ve just really wanted to talk about why I love Aventio because the people do not get it like I do and GODDD ITS SO GOOD WHEN DONE CORRECTLY UGHHHHH
Also this is gonna be VERY stream of consciousness I do not have a plan besides dragging you through my brain so enjoy the ride.
I guess the best place to start is the fact that Aventurine and Ratio are my two favorite characters in the game. Like even if they have no interactions with each other ever and might as well be from different pieces of media I would ship them, because I like seeing characters I like interact and the fun police cannot catch me. That’s a really shallow personal reason though and I feel like the rest I have will be able to be appreciated by others.
GOD THE DYNAMIC IS SO GOOD RAAAAAA
Two emotional constipated dumbasses circling around each other like black holes trying desperately to deny and run from their feelings when they have both fallen hard. The lack of acknowledgement of feelings on both ends is TRAGIC and it makes me want to rip my eyes out in a good way, let’s start with Ratio.
Unfortunately my glorious king Ratio has been mischaracterized to hell and back but we will get to that (and the Incorrect Reasons Why People Hate Aventio) later. Instead I will go over his actual character; a deeply insecure, intelligent man who desperately wants the rest of the galaxy to come to the realizations he has long since stumbled upon, but has been so isolated from his peers from such a young age that he’s doomed to fail in literally every social interaction he has and be misunderstood by both the audience in universe and irl (the autistic coding isn’t helping him either).
Ratio is tragically misunderstood again, both in universe and by the audience, which is why it means so much that Aventurine Gets Him. Aventurine pushes his buttons, tears down that literal cold marble facade masking the deeply silly and caring man beneath (this man bathes with rubber duckies in the privacy of his own home 😭), and that scares the shit out of Ratio. People aren’t meant to see through him, Ratio acts rude not just because he believes it’s the best way to help people, and because he believes he himself is mundane and the conclusions they come to should be their own, not his.
No, it’s also because on some level Ratio is afraid to be vulnerable around people. As much as he pretends like it doesn’t affect him, Nous’s rejection has hurt and haunted Ratio for his entire life. And I do mean his entire life, even in high school he had already set up a strict routine for himself, something commented on by his teacher, Ratio has quite literally always been striving for some sort of perfection and the fact that he cannot achieve it kills him.
Moreover, the guy just grew up way too fast, he didn’t have time to develop social skills. We see it in that afformentioned relationship with his teacher, in which they recommend Ratio (who is again in high school) to be moved up to college level stuff and transferred due to his success. He has quite literally never been able to just relax in a environment of his peers, Ratio for some reason we don’t yet know has always been dedicated to constant improvement and that leaves no room for dealing with failure.
On some level, he knows this too, that he can never be perfect. Ratio is part of the Mundanites in the Intelligenica Guild for a reason, he doesn’t just see himself as mediocre because he believes everyone is and that’s ok, but also because he looks down on himself for being too mediocre for the Genius Society, being too mediocre for Nous’s acknowledgement, being too mediocre for anything.
Which is tragic because Ratio is very accomplished and he is very smart, and his character stories aren’t even told from his pov, but rather in the style of documentaries and letters (his professor) and other works on his well acclaimed life. We don’t ever get to see how Ratio really sees himself, just the tiny cracks in his marble facade that let the real man behind the character shine through.
Because that’s what he’s playing 90% of the time, a character. Whether it be at the Herta Space Station in which his real goal was to uproot the researchers blind worship of the Genius Society, or in Penacony in which he plays up the arrogant, narcissistic scholar both people in universe and irl make him out to be, both to serve a goal bigger than himself. 
Sincere moments from Ratio are RARE but god are they beautiful, his conversation from Screwllum in 1.6 and his note to Aventurine in 2.1 will forever haunt me in the best way possible. If you want to understand Ratio as a character, yes read his character stories, but just watch that damn scene with Screwllum it is phenomenal. He cares so much and is so, so bad at expressing it, he drives me nuts, Veritas Ratio the man you are. 
And the thing is, it seems like he’s always been playing a character and doesn’t know where the real him ends anymore so he just sticks to the way people perceive him a lot of the time. Like as a kid he was constantly striving to be the best so he missed a lot of necessary developmental shit, and as an adult he’s a celebrity so it’s hard for him to attach himself to others anyways because society and his students will hound him for it.
And then you throw Aventurine into the mix, and oh boy does shit get interesting.
Veritas Ratio, perfect “unfeeling” Veritas Ratio and the one person who gets him well enough to push all his buttons and expose the vulnerable underbelly he thought he hid so well. On a fundamental level, Ratio understands this, which is why he doesn’t bother with the alabaster head, as pretending the real him is just as unfeeling and uncaring is easier.
So he brushes off Aventurine’s jests as if they are an insult to his very existence, he can’t look in Aventurine’s eyes when he “betrays” him because his poker face would break, he leaves as soon as he’s done talking because lingering would allow the weight of their conversations to sink in. Part of it is because for pretty much all of Penacony, up until the note Ratio gives him, Ratio is acting, trying to play up the role of the arrogant, unfeeling scholar to make Sunday buy the betrayal plan, because to Sunday this behavior is signs of a bad relationship between the two (honestly the fact that the audience also interpreted it this way makes me mad like did yall seriously not pay attention, but also happy because if even the players were fooled that means Sunday buying it is believable). 
However, even if it feeds into his insecurities, Aventurine knows that false facade and loves tearing it down. It’s very telling that the second time we see Ratio really freak out (the first being at Herta Space Station) is at the suggestion that he came to narrate Aventurine’s demo not because of knowledge or respect for the show or whatever, but because he genuinely likes the guy. What makes it even better is that Aventurine is the one who suggested it, and already figured out the excuses Ratio was going to use to deny it. Ratio can fool everyone else in the galaxy, but he cannot fool Aventurine, and on a fundamental level that is what makes their dynamic work, because Ratio knows Aventurine in the exact same way.
Aventurine can shove away people who care about him, out of distrust and fear that they will leave him like his family did. He can believe he’s unloveable and a person so detestable that even the actions he performs in order to stay alive condemn him to hate himself as much as the rest of the galaxy hates him. But, Ratio doesn’t see him that way.
Aventurine doubts his intelligence, if he has really earned anything he’s done and in his voiceline about Ratio, doubting if Ratio even sees him as smart or worthy. However, Ratios voiceline about Aventurine is about how he believes Aventurine is smart and worthy, and that his doubt will be his downfall if he doesn’t come to the realization that he isn’t worthless. 
Ratio knows Aventurine’s one weakness, the one thing that could stop him; himself. That’s why he gives him the note urging him to stay alive and keep on living because ultimately Aventurine will only ever fail if he gives up. And The Note Is Enough, Aventurine walks into the event horizon of a black hole, confident he can return alive on the other side because someone cares about him, BECAUSE RATIO CARES ABOUT HIM, and wants him to live on even if Aventurine doesn’t feel that way towards himself.
In the metaphorical and literal manifestation of the meaningless of the universe, in the face of overwhelming nihility, Aventurine survives because someone loves him, and with that love he’s strong enough to brave even that. 
Even if they can’t admit it out loud, these two deeply, deeply care for one another and trust each other perhaps more than anyone else in the narrative. The betrayal plan would have never worked if there was not mutual trust, Ratio wouldn’t have gone to Penacony in the first place if he didn’t trust Aventurine, and Aventurine wouldn’t have asked him to come if he did not trust him. We don’t just see this trust between Aventurine and Ratio either, and Jade and Topaz both trust him with their cornerstones, but ultimately it’s Ratio who’s physically with him the whole time, risking his life alongside him for the sake of their plan. 
As much as people like to ignore it, lying to the Family members, to Sunday, is extremely dangerous and puts Ratio’s life in danger as much as it does Aventurine’s. Ratio is not an irrational person, he wouldn’t have done that if he didn’t have faith Aventurine would succeed, he would not have done if he didn’t think he would return. They have absolutely faith in one another and it’s beautiful. 
Aventurine’s first constellation is named “Prisoner’s Dilemma” for a reason. A social experiment in which two prisoners are captured and separated, if they sell the other one out and remain silent, they go free but the other remains in jail for 20 years. If they both sell each other out, they get a sentence of 5 years. 
But if they both remain silent, trust the other, they even if they physically can’t communicate and don’t know what the other says, they get the best possible outcome, only one year in jail each. It requires a sacrifice on both ends, they both still have to go to jail, but only for a year, and only if they trust each other completely, as if the other sells them out they will be in jail for 20.
The prisoners dilemma relies completely on trust, and it’s the exact situation Aventurine and Ratio face in the Penacony quests. Aventurines doubts if Ratio’s betrayal was real or not, even if he set it up himself, and Ratio worries about Aventurines survival, if continuing this plan will end well. “You can’t expect a featherless bird to take flight” isn’t just Ratio chastising Sunday, he’s genuinely worried that this plan will put Aventurine at too much of a disadvantage to continue on. 
But they both trust each other, and if just like in the Dilemma neither come out completely unscathed (although it’s much worse on Aventurine’s end), they ultimately achieve their goal. 
God is it sweet and corny in the best way possible 
I want to kill this fandoms perception of stoic, emotionless Ratio because once people realize he’s actually the corniest mf ever is the day I sleep easy. He makes statues of himself doing Jojo poses, he plays chess versus himself, he named himself Veritas (truth), he loves rubber duckies, he literally sits in a bathtub couch, and Aventurine breaths and he gets flustered.
Ratio so deeply silly, chronically corny, it’s a crime he needs to be locked up someone stop him. 
And Aven brings that out of him. His teasing reveals the goofball trying so desperately to disguise himself as a serious scholar. Ratio is very smart of course, but that only makes his silliness better, as you watch this absolute genius of a man behave like a tsundere schoolgirl. 
It’s not like Aventurine is some paragon of seriousness either, he’s the one teasing Ratio, fucking around even in a serious mission. Yeah it’s partly because he wants Sunday to think he’s incompetent, but it’s also because Aventurine genuinely is having fun, enjoying himself before the serious part of the plan kicks in, and the meantime he does that by messing with Ratio.
Their dynamic of Aventurine messing with Ratio, and Ratio trying desperately to pretend like it doesn’t affect him is as hilarious and heartwarming as it is tragic, and that dichotomy is why I love them so much. It’s fun and it hurts so so much because their interactions being this flavor of silly leaves almost no room for the sincerity they both desperately need from one another. 
AND GOD I NEED IT TO HAPPEN. RATIO MENTAL BREAKDOWN SCENE PLEAASEEE LET HIS WALLS CRUMBLE PLEEEEAASEE PLEASE PELADE PLEASEEEE EPLES DOLS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 
They’ve gotten closer and closer and closer and soon something’s gonna snap because they are so close yet so distant and if something doesn’t change the tension is just gonna boil over AND I NEED IT TO HAPPEN. I need more Ratio scenes I need more interactions with him I need him with his guard down I need him to profess out loud that he cares about Aventurine I need him to break please he needs it, it would be so good for him. It doesn’t even have to be from Aventurine, just Ratio snapping and revealing the fucking mess he is under his facade and not being rejected by the people he cares about for it is enough.
I honestly doubt it will happen in the story though, as much as I want it to. Although Aventurine’s character demo somewhat changed my mind against this, I feel like hoyo is like “ok they get the vibe between these two we can move on” and the shippers are left to extrapolate how this relationship would go beyond what it is now. As much as I want a breakdown scene for Ratio in general, it probably wouldn’t happen in a while but devs if you are reading this PLEASEEEE. 
The only time Ratio ever gets slightly out of his element is with Aventurine but I need it to go further because god it would be interesting.
Well I’ve deemed that enough yapping about why I love Aventio (for now 😈) so let’s talk about why people hate the ship and why most of the reasons behind it a fucking stupid. (Massive disclaimer of course you can dislike it it’s just a lot of the “oh it’s a horrible ship and anyone who likes it sucks” shit isn’t grounded in reality in the slightest and I’m tired of the slander)
“Ratio was racist to Aventurine”
Now this is a spicy one because if this post was made in 2.0 I would 100% agree with you (during that time I shipped a non canon version of them in which that did not happen because how dare u do my boy like that hoyo). However 2.1 changed a lot and I mean a lot, and basically reframed the 2.0 quests for everyone.
Essentially, Ratio and Aventurine were both acting in that argument scene, making the things Ratio said to Aventurine not how he really sees him, and actively something Aventurine wanted him to say, so you cannot blame him for what he said. I’m not even joking or exaggerating, retrospectively it quite literally does not make sense if you view it in any other way, and honestly even with just the knowledge of 2.0 the scene doesn’t make sense if played straight, so let’s get to why.
a) Ratio and Racism do not mix fundamentally. Ratio is a person who believes that everyone deserves and education regardless of background, that it is a scholars duty to help others achieve that, and no matter who you are, you are capable of intelligence, learning and becoming the best version of yourself, and that those qualities are just limited to geniuses.
THIS AND RACISM DO NOT MIX. “Oh yeah education and improvement is possible for everyone except this specific group of people for some fucking reason!!” Like not only would this scene being serious contradict Ratios entire character, the man who believes people should not be judged for their educational background judging Aventurine for his educational background (that’s actually what the Sigonian upbringing line meant, it was mistranslated in the EN version)??!?!! Make it make sense.
Moreover, half this perception also come from the fact that hoyo made the incredible writing decision of naming Aventurines planet after a slur for Romani people, so unfortunately literally anytime its name, Sigonia, is brought up you’re essentially saying a slur. It’s much worse in the CN version, in EN it’s not obvious at all, because our version of the slur (it starts with a g and ends with a y that’s all the hints you’re getting), doesn’t look like the version of the slur that the name for Sigonia was derived from, which is partly the source of this misconception as I’m pretty certain most people assumed Ratio (and by extension Sparkle) said a slur elsewhere in the conversation when in reality them referring to Avens ethnicity/background/planet IS the slur.
Anyways terrible writing decisions aside, Ratio supposedly being racist doesn’t just contradict his core motivation, it contradicts his job. He’s a scholar, for fucks sake, and racism is inherently illogical. Mmm yes I’m gonna base my identity around finding truth for myself and I will believe government and social propaganda about specific groups of people! Very logical, very scholarly, we all clapped. 
So yeah, doesn’t make sense on a character level, to the point that in 2.0 I concluded that they must be using Ratio as a plot device in that scene to deliver some of Aven’s backstory to the audience due to how OOC it was for him 😭. However I wasn’t necessarily wrong, Ratio was delivering some of Aventurines backstory to AN audience (not just us), and he was behaving OOC in the 2.0 scene, but it was on purpose.
b) The betrayal plan 
Aventurine forms a plan in which him and Ratio pretend to betray one another in order to sneak the Aventurine cornerstone into the dreamscape by replacing it with the Topaz stone (red herring + black hole scene dialogue implies she and Jade are there for other reasons) and the Jade stone (perfect dupe). 
Now this betrayal hinges on Sunday, their main antagonist buying it, actually believing that Ratio would betray Aventurine on a mission as important as Penacony, and it requires Sunday also buying that he is winning the whole time, that the loss of the cornerstones was somehow a fumble on Aventurine’s end rather than something he planned all along. 
So, they stage the 2.0 conversation. Ratio yells at Aventurine for losing the cornerstones, something which was part of their plan the whole time. He then insults Aventurine’s background allowing Aventurine to reveal key details of his past that Sunday would not have learned otherwise, which he uses in the trial against Aventurine. Seriously, Aventurine only found out he was the last Avgin when he became a Stoneheart, do y’all think Sunday summoned that info with his mind or something during the trial (like do you guys genuinely think Sunday read his wiki or something)
Moreover, Ratio not only insults him, but portrays Aventurine as useless, disposable to the IPC because he is apparently already sentenced to death. Why does he do this? Well, so Sunday feels confident enough to do the same to Aventurine. Seriously, sentencing an IPC member, especially a high ranking one to death is a risky move, even for someone as convicted as Sunday, he would need the confidence to do so and learning Aven might already die would give him that ability. 
Because well, it doesn’t matter that much if he’s already going to get disposed of in the near future. I also think the IPC plans to use Aventurine’s “death” as leverage against the family because they were pleased to hear of his death sentence according to Dr. Ratio, meaning a) he likely did not have one from them at the time, although in the past he was sentenced to death and b) even if Aventurine succeeded in getting the cornerstone his seeming loss in the rest of the conversation wasn’t actually a loss at all, getting sentenced to death/“dying” at the very least was part of the plan all along as the IPC could still use it as leverage if things went south.
Continually, Ratio treating Aventurine in the exact same sh1tty way the rest of the galaxy does perfectly slots him into the arrogant, uncaring scholar role, which Sunday knows are some of the most easily manipulated people in the galaxy, considering he tries to bribe Ratio with knowledge about Stellarons it seems he bought this idea hook line and sinker. Sunday isn’t even subtle about it either “I heard you and your companion haven’t been getting along lately” where did he hear that from? Ratio didn’t tell him, and even though we know Sunday was 100% watching the two of them on their little adventure pre-meeting him (the bird and hound statues) that scene hasn’t happened yet so where did he get that from?
Some other interesting proof for it is that the Final Victor lightcone likely depicts Aventurine trying to convince Ratio of this plan of his, the events of which must occur  pre-Penacony for several reasons, the least of which being that we just never see it happen on Penacony which if you think it did we would see it. Moreover lightcones are canonically condensed memories and the Final Victor lightcone released in 2.0, meaning it’s the memory of something that happened before then. 
All signs point to the 2.0 scene, the one people use to paint Aventio as toxic being staged. And I have so much more evidence for this, (Ratio would never agree to go without a plan, Aven clearly formed his pre-Penaocny, so much of the plan like Ratio opening the cornerstone box, which he can’t do up until the betrayal as it’s in Sundays possession, rely on him arriving knowing how to do so, the time discrepancies, the complete 180 in personality Ratio would have to do to go from distrusting Aventurine to putting his whole faith in him, etc), but I will reupload one of my old slideshows to elaborate more on it. Basically the one thing that people use to say it’s toxic is not true and is in fact a greater show of the trust between those two. 
“The shippers are all weird and racist” 
Now this one actually has some truth to it because yes there are some incredibly fucking weird Aventio shippers and I do not blame yall for disliking them.
HOWEVER, most Aventio shippers are normal and hate that shit just as much as you guys do. Like do you realize most shippers also really like these characters and have something insane called morals so they don’t automatically excuse racist fujoshi goobers just because they are making content for their favorite ship. Trust me someone doing that pisses me (and most other Aventio shippers) off significantly more than people who hate the ship. Also free Ratio from this shit man poor guy is getting mischaracterized as a slaveowner by his fans and haters 😭
And like guys, have you ever been in a fandom before, like ever? Weirdos are always gonna be weird and it’s not Aventio’s fault they are this months victims. For a fun little example of how gross other fanbases can be, one of the most popular Overwatch ships on ao3 is Genji Shimada X Hanzo Shimada WHO ARE BLOOD RELATED BROTHERS. THERES LIKE 300+ FICS OF IT, SHIMADACEST IS LITERALLY A TAG ON THERE. I WAS IN THE TRENCHES SEARCHING FOR GENJI HANZO ANGST FICS (Hanzo killed Genji it’s complicated doomed siblings will always get me) AND HAVING TO COMB THROUGH THOSE ABOMINATIONS IN THE PROCESS.
Like please I’m relatively new to fandom culture but yall cannot be acting like this is weird for fans to do, it’s weirdo behavior but it is not unique to the HSR fandom or even Aventio. And even if understandably this makes you not like the ship, don’t paint the people who enjoy it as being the people who do this kinda sh1t. It’s not our fault peak gets tainted by miserable creatures ok, let normal ppl have their harmless fun and stop lumping people together into a monolith. 
?????
Well that’s it that’s all the “valid” reasons people have for hating Aventio, at least the ones I can remember. Everything else is just personal opinion and not at all an objective reason.
“They’re so sibling coded!”
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Anyways again obviously you can still dislike it not everything is for everyone, I really just wanted to make this post to demonstrate why I and many others like it, and why the reasons people use to say it’s problematic are incorrect. Feel free to call it mid, block it whatever I don’t care, just don’t harass shippers for having some harmless fun, because the characters aren’t real but the people who like them are and in doing so you are really just being a jerk for no reason. If you somehow hate Aventio and read this the whole way through I congratulate you on your ability to actually listen to other people, and regardless of whether you changed your mind or not I respect you for doing so anyways. Thanks for reading and I would love to hear your thoughts. 
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hotchfiles · 7 months
Text
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ❝ the mood i'm in ❞ ─ an adhd chronicles blurb
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pairing: aaron hotchner x fem!adhd!reader. summary: sometimes rearranging a whole entire closet is a biological need. content warnings: fluff, adhd antics (i'm diagnosed don't try to come for me) word count: 600+. a/n: this was requested by @ficmeoutofthisworld and i felt the need to make a blurb!verse of it, so expect more fluff for these three 🩵 & the idea of jack calling you honey came from honey is for love by @angellsell
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      “Daddy, honey has that weird look again.” Aaron can’t help but smile at his little boy, putting the files he was working on down on his desk, telling him to come closer with his hands. Jack had gotten into the habit of calling you honey very early on in your relationship, that being one of the pet names Aaron used the most when talking to you. It was too endearing to correct him, even after you moved in. You both just let the boy be, knowing that he would call you by name once he got older.
      You didn’t mind him not calling you mom or any of its variants, even if the relationship you shared now was much alike mother and child, Jack didn’t remember a lot of Haley by himself, he was too little, but Aaron always did his best to keep her memory alive in him, so if for his young mind it was easier to call you a pet name, you would take it every single time with a smile. And so would Aaron. 
      “What look, buddy?” He asks even though he’s sure he knows the answer, having been through that a few times over the last two years. 
      “She’s staring at my stuff and sitting on the floor.” Bingo. Every once in a while you would get obsessed with something, it made sense after you were diagnosed with ADHD and he learnt how to accommodate you properly, but for a while it was just a big clash of his organized and controlling nature and your chaotic mind. 
      “Let’s see what she needs, okay?” Jack nods, leading the way with his dad closely behind. They find you exactly as his boy explained to him, sitting with your legs crossed on the floor, staring at his wardrobe so attentively it might scare the unknown eye. 
      “Darling? What’s going on?” He asks without entering the room, not wanting to invade your space before you called him in, instead he decided to lean on the door frame, observing you with his kind eyes.
      “I want to rearrange all of Jack’s clothes but we need more hangers for that and I don’t want to go to the store just to buy hangers, but I also can’t get up to go to the kitchen and check what else we need.” You answered quickly, finishing your ramble with a huff, dropping your shoulders and looking at your fiancé with a pout that made him get closer to you, offering his hands so you could have some support while getting up, you lazily do it, being embraced by him as soon as your feet touch the ground. 
      “Go watch something with Jack, okay?” His tone is always soft, as if your conversations, even the silliest and mundane ones, were secrets for you two to keep. He knew you too well, so he prevented the whine he knew would come–you wanted to get this done, you needed to rearrange Jack’s clothes or the itch in your brain wouldn’t leave–and he did so by holding both of your cheeks with his hands, making you look at him. “I’ll make the shopping list and then you both can go to Target while I get some reports done.” You nod happily, his hands moving with your head. 
      Telling you to watch something with Jack could seem like a mindless choice of words, but it wasn’t, Aaron knew you were feeling stuck and how bad that made you feel, you needed a dopamine kick before you could do something, and no better way for that than colorful silly shows with your favorite boy.
      By the time he’s done with the shopping list, you had already started another important project: Napping on the couch with Jack. So he leaves it attached with a magnet on the fridge, gives you both soft forehead kisses and goes back to work, not minding the fact he did it quickly for no reason, happy you were resting and that it was done for when you decided to shop.
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meo-eiru · 28 days
Note
Hey pooks! I just thought of this on the fly but I wanted your take on it. How would Eli be when him and his darling reach old age? Say the darling is a saint and puts up with his antics. Will he calm down once he realizes it’s been 40+ years of marriage and they aren’t going anywhere? And how would he feel once he sees that he is getting older?
Thank you and hope you like it!
Elias would be one beautiful old man honestly, he’d age like the finest wine (I can’t draw old men for the life of me so I’m leaving it to yall’s imagination)
I think he would calm down a bit, mostly because he doesn’t have the strength to run to the nearest knife at the slightest inconvenience anymore, but also because he’s just living the bliss of being mutually in love for 40+ years. His jealousy wouldn’t go away, it’d just be directed towards a new age group now, but by that point you probably figured out the ways of calming him down within seconds.
His favorite activity would still be spending time with you. He’s love for you two to just sit at the balcony as he watches you knit or talk about mundane stuff. It’s just very peaceful. His love wouldn’t lessen even 1 drop through the years. He started off as a lover boy and stayed a lover boy. An older Elias would have a more old romantic vibe to him. He’d probably buy you flowers whenever he goes out so your house would be filled with them. He’d get your photos printed and place them between book pages so that he can see them and cheer up whenever he decides to read something.
If you two had kids he would probably want them to move out as soon as possible but wouldn’t mind them coming over for visits. He wouldn’t want you to tire yourself cooking for them or something though, they are old enough, they should be the ones serving you.
I think when he first start getting wrinkles and stuff he’d panic a lot. He’d be scared of getting ugly and you leaving him for a younger man. He might even attempt getting plastic surgery done. You would need to talk him out of it saying he’s beautiful that way too and you want to get old together with him. He’d cry a lot when he hears that and start thinking of them as a way of matching with you instead.
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tiredfox64 · 4 months
Note
Since my identity as an anon have been exposed for that fic I did request,,,,
Can you make Pipsqueak pt. 2,,,,
*looks at u with my big eyes*
(I need to know the stupid shenanigans,,,,)
(Sorry got gay)
Little Bitty Pretty One
Yip notes: in my best Italian accent Don't say I neva did anything for ya. You are in debt to me.
Pairing: Bi-Han x Gn reader
Warnings ‼️: Haha you still small!
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It seems when you need Liu Kang the most he is not there to answer. He could at least leave a message.
Well, you’re still small, unfortunately. Or maybe you like this situation. You’ve been stuck this way for two days now. Just as Bi-Han thought, you are incapable of doing many things. You’ve been depending on him for everything. You truly had no choice but to obey your grandmaster. Cause when you are the size of a Norway rat but lack the abilities of one your survivability is at a low possibility. So do him a favor and act good.
══💤══╡°˖✧🦊✧˖°╞══💤══
Bi-Han tries his best not to wake you up in the morning. He’s been keeping you in his room so he can keep an eye on you and prevent you from getting hurt. He has to tiptoe around or else he will wake you up. Little does he know you’ve been waking up when he does because he always groans when he wakes up. What a loudmouth. You stir in your makeshift bed made of soft cloth material and a sponge before pretending to still be asleep. He doesn’t know that you like to peek at him when he is getting ready for the day. He doesn’t sleep with a shirt on…need I say more? It’s enjoyable to watch him tie his hair into a bun, he looks so pretty. But you can’t watch him change fully he puts a bowl over you to prevent you from seeing. No worries there are holes at the top to allow you to breathe. Alright, now he will wake you up.
He pokes your back viciously but not enough to possibly break your spine. You smack his finger which does nothing, go figures. Then he scolds you lightly for hitting your grandmaster. Again, he can’t yell or else he will risk bursting your eardrums.
Breakfast time! What do you want? Trick question, you have no choice. Whatever Bi-Han gives you is what you get. He purposely leaves some of the food big to make it seem like you are a rat nibbling on it. As he eats his breakfast he’ll occasionally look to his side to see you nibbling on a slice of carrot, your teeth leaving little marks. Now you’re whining, saying you need much more than that.
“You are acting very greedy. Have I not done enough for you already?” Bi-Han asked but you know he is being petty. When is he not.
Fine, he gave you a proper meal. Though the slice of cucumber he provided was still too big for you so you had to munch on it for a bit. He found it entertaining to see you stuff my cheeks full of food like a hamster. You did look silly that way. Especially with that glare you gave him.
Time for practice! Not for you, you’re too tiny for that. You’re gonna be staying in the palm of Bi-Han’s hand where he will proceed to pet your back with his finger. He starts from the top of your head before sliding down to your lower back. For some reason, you immediately relax when he does that. You fight a little because you know he likes finding people’s weak spots and exploiting them. But you stood little chance since even when you were big you still couldn’t fight him off. So you are forced to partake in this wonderful torment where he slowly watches you melt in his hands.
Bi-Han was so distracted by tormenting you he forgot to give orders to the rest of his clan. They waited with confused expressions. Kuai Liang had to tap on his brother to get his attention, only to be glared at by him as he quickly cupped you in his hands. He thought someone was trying to snatch you away from him. He can’t have that happening.
“What do you want, Kuai Liang?” he asked in annoyance.
Kuai Liang craned his neck in the direction of the clan to show that they were waiting. Bi-Han groaned as usual and gave them an order. Something mundane because he couldn’t care less in that moment. He was more preoccupied with you which you were trying to squeeze out of his hands again because you didn’t appreciate him leaving you in darkness.
Your little hands were trying to scratch their way between his fingers before he realized what you were doing. He uncapped his hands and you looked up at him like he just committed the ultimate betrayal.
“Don’t give me that face.”
He had you sit on his hand while looking out to the clan so you could watch them. His pointer finger and thumb were constantly squishing your face or rubbing below your chin. At this point anything he is doing to you is subconscious. He doesn’t know that he is doing it but it feels right to do, like twirling a pen while writing. It is necessary to squish something so small and fragile. You’re not having it. You’re out of here! Plan your escape!
You started walking on his arm, occasionally having to grab onto his arm guards to prevent yourself from plummeting to the ground. He sees your efforts and he does not like it. He tried to grab you but you kept swerving out of the way. Soon enough you were at his clothes and used them as a way to get down. You heard him saying words such as ‘stop’, ‘no’, and the occasional ‘obey your grandmaster’. You’re your own person, you can handle yourself! You can survive without your grandmaster’s assistance.
Never mind there was a giant golden orb weaver on the ground. It’s a female unfortunately so it’s humongous. You are not ready to handle that.
Bi-Han!!!
He froze the weaver in a matter of seconds before shattering it into millions of pieces. You were hugging his boot with your eyes closed, wondering if he demolished the arachnid. He picked you up by your uniform and you screamed thinking it was the spider before realizing it was Bi-Han.
“Will you listen to me now?” he asked with his usual grumpy tone.
“Yes, grandmaster.” You replied with your head lowered.
You obeyed him for the rest of the time, thank the elder gods. I would say that it made everything easier but you were still left being poked, petted, and squished by Bi-Han. At least when dinner time rolled around you were able to breathe. You got to munch on a nice, fat dumpling. Took a while before you got to the filling but it was so worth it when you did. That dinner could have knocked you out immediately after. You almost did but you were startled when Bi-Han picked you up and brought you to his office.
Escape plan part two!
Forget it, he already knew what you were planning. You tried to run around on his deck but he quickly pulled you back before placing you at one end of a hand towel. In one fell swoop he rolled you up like sushi. There, now you will stay in one place.
“Hey! You can’t do this! I’m a human being!” You yelled in a shrilled voice.
“A human being who drank a potion when I told you not to.” He got you there.
You could be angry all you want but you did get yourself into this mess. So just lay there and take your medicine.
You were forced to lay there silently as Bi-Han worked for about half an hour before the door opened. Finally, Liu Kang is here to help you. But for some reason, Bi-Han didn’t seem to be thrilled about this.
“I have been informed that there was a little incident,” Pun intended, “Let me assist in making things righ—oh.”
Liu Kang saw you wrapped in the hand towel with your eyebrows furrowed in anger. He gave a questioning look towards Bi-Han but at the same time, he could understand if your grandmaster had a hard time keeping you under control. Liu Kang had to hold himself back from chuckling as he reached towards you. He was going to unravel you to help get you back to normal but Bi-Han snatched you away. It nearly gave you whiplash.
“Bi-Han, I need them to get them back to normal.” Liu Kang informed him but Bi-Han walked out of the room with you in hand.
You were shouting at him and asking what he was doing and saying that this was what he wanted. You may think this whole situation was a hassle for Bi-Han. You would be slightly wrong. He finds this situation very entertaining and even, though he would never admit, adorable. It’s like having his own personal pet. A pet that has to depend on him because they don’t have any animal-like skills.
He will have you return back to normal one of these days. But this day won’t be it. Liu Kang was trying to get an answer from him but he wouldn’t say a word. He walked right into his bedroom, made a wall of ice to prevent anyone from getting in, and sat right on his bed.
He unraveled you before carefully placing you in your makeshift bed. He didn’t want you asking any more questions so he started to pet your back again. It’s too easy. With the food in your belly, the tight wrap from the towel, and the feeling of Bi-Han petting and rubbing your back you were out like a light. You were even drooling a little.
Bi-Han hasn’t felt this much joy from something in a long, long time. He wasn’t even allowed to have a pet when he was young. So let him enjoy this for a little longer then he will bring you back to normal.
But when you are back to normal you better not drink another strange potion he swears to the elder gods!
Now he can get ready for bed. He needs to mentally prepare himself for the next day. Who knows what you could do then.
Are you peeking at him taking his shirt off again? Turn your head! Damn rodent…
Yap notes: Last time I wrote for you that spine-eating goofball payed me a visit. He better not come around again just cause I did this for you. Also I hope you are feeling better I saw that you said you were sick get some Vic’s vaporub, ginger ale, and an egg to cleanse yourself. Adiós!
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resident-gay-bitch · 7 months
Text
This is inspired by this post :))
“Padfoot?” Harry asked, scrambling up to the table beside Sirius. He slapped his grubby little hands up on the table that was taller than he, and peaked over it to get a look at what Sirius was doing, “What’s that?”
“These are taxes.” Sirius said calmly, reaching down to grab Harry by the waist and hoist him up onto his own lap, “It’s things adults have to do with money. It’s very boring.”
“Do you have to do writing?” He asked, poking the page with a… green finger.
“Yes, a little bit.” Sirius said, grabbing Harry’s hand to get a good look at it, “Why are all of your fingers different colours, Bambi?”
“I wanted to be a rainbow!” He exclaimed, poking Sirius in the face, “Just like you!”
Beside them, Remus snickered, covering his mouth with his hand.
“Just like me, huh?” Sirius asked.
“Yeah.” Harry giggled, “Like you and uncle Moony.”
Sirius laughed and nudged Remus in the ribs, “Hear that Moons? It’s not just me.”
Remus rolled his eyes and shook his head, “You’re trouble, Harry.”
Harry giggled and smiled up at Sirius, “Do you get to do colouring on taxis?”
“Taxes, Sprout, they’re called taxes.” Sirius corrected, running a hand over Harry’s unruly hair, “And no, it’s so boring. No colours allowed.”
Harry poked out his tongue and blew a raspberry, “Can I help you? Maybe I can make it fun.”
“You can absolutely help me if you like, Remus has to help me too because I’m not much good at this stuff. I reckon you’ll be pretty good at it though, don’t you think?”
“Yeah! I’m good at everything.” Harry nodded, “Mummy says I’m the best ever.”
“Well, your mummy is right. Isn’t she, Moons?”
“She’d probably hex me if I said she was ever wrong.” Remus agreed, “So yes, your mother is always right, Harry. You are the best ever.”
Proudly, Harry grinned and stuck his hands up in the air. Sirius tugged him into a big hug and kissed the top of his head before they settled comfortably in their shared chair.
Harry listened carefully as Remus explained each step to Sirius, and together they figured out how to do Sirius’ taxes.
Once that task was done, Remus left for work and Harry followed Sirius through their little house towards the laundry.
“Can I help, please, Padfoot. Mummy says I’m so helpful.”
“Absolutely you can help me, Harry.” Sirius grinned, opening up the washing machine and pulling out all the wet laundry. “I’ll carry this basket outside because it’s very heavy, but maybe you can help me hang everything out, how does that sound?”
“Okay!” Harry shouted running off in the other direction, “I’ll go get your sunglasses!”
“They’re beside my bed!” Sirius called back, chuckling to himself as he loaded up the basket.
He met Harry by the back door, and the little boy was huffing and puffing from his run throughout the house, looking for Sirius’ sunglasses and his own pair that had gotten lost in the mess of his own little room for sleepovers.
They both put their shades on, looking super cool and awesome in them together, and went outside into the summer sun to hang the laundry.
Harry was very helpful, as he said he would be, and handed Sirius each individual item from the basket so he could hang them out. Harry wanted to help hang things up too, because he said it looked fun, but he was too short to reach the clothes line. Sirius did put the boy on his shoulders at one point to hang a few of his own little socks and undies out.
Harry was very satisfied to be helping. Sirius finds it’s adorable how Harry just wants to hang around him all the time, even when he’s doing perfectly mundane things like laundry and taxes. But he supposed he used to be the same with James.
When they were younger, Sirius would follow James everywhere, and he’d watch when James wanted to do extra homework, he’d watch when James polished his broom, and he’d hang around when James wanted to read his magazines. They were best friends, of course Sirius wanted to spend every waking minute with James.
It fills him with so much pride to be that best friend to little Harry. It makes him so happy to know that Harry likes to plod around behind Sirius, doing the most boring of things, simply because he enjoys Sirius’ presence.
Sirius and James may be the best of friends, but they’re nothing compared to the friendship Harry and Sirius have created. They’re together as much as they possibly can be. When Harry was really little, he’d often get confused and call Sirius “dad”, which only made James extremely happy of course.
After the laundry was hung out, they popped back inside for a spot of tea and muffins before getting ready to head out for the day. Harry put his favorite t-rex shirt on, and the boots Sirius bought him for his last birthday. Sirius also wore his boots, and his T.Rex shirt so they’d sort of match.
They both took their leather jackets and wore their matching “cool guy” sunglasses.
Sirius isn’t allowed to take Harry on his motorcycle without adult supervision (James does not count as adult supervision), so they walked down the street, hand in hand, to the bus stop to head into town.
Harry had a wonderful time on the bus, as he always does. He likes to press his face up against the window and watch the world zoom by. It fascinates him how they can move so fast without feeling the wind in his hair or anything, unlike flying on a broom. He thinks it’s brilliant.
He also had a lovely chat with an older lady on the bus. Harry likes to talk to strangers, which became a bit of an issue a few months ago when he’d just wonder off with them. Luckily none had been of the evil sort and helped him find his family again, but it was certainly a problem. He’s better now though, only talking with strangers when someone he knows is also there.
So when an older lady sat across from them on the bus, Harry got chatting away. She told Sirius he was such a lovely boy, and that he should be a very proud dad. Harry and Sirius both had a bit of a giggle about that, and Harry corrected her by calling Sirius his “bestest friend in the entire world and also my uncle”.
When they finally reached their stop, Sirius had to pick Harry up and carry him away because all he wanted to do was chat with the lady. He was very upset to get off the bus, but Sirius bribed him with a lollipop later, so Harry calmed down.
“What’s this place?” Harry asked as they walked through the double doors of the optometrist.
“It’s where you go to get glasses.”
“Oh…” He furrowed his brow, “Did daddy have to go here?”
“Yep.” Sirius nodded, “He has to come back every so often, too.”
“Why are we here?” Harry asked, skipping along beside Sirius as they walked up to the counter, their hands intertwined.
“Because Moony thinks I need glasses, even though I think he’s wrong. But also… you might need glasses too.”
“Like daddy?”
“Yeah, like daddy.” Sirius smiled, “We have to get a little test done, but don’t worry, it’s not scary, just a bit weird. And I’m gonna be there the whole time.”
“Okay.” Harry shrugged, “Can I get glasses like daddy?”
“You can get whatever glasses you want, if the eye doctors say you need them.”
“Okay!” Harry grinned, jumping on the spot.
When the pair were finally called in for their assessment, Sirius went first to help calm some of Harry’s rising nerves. He sat in the chair and confidently named all the letters the optometrist pointed out to him. Once all his tests were done, and Harry was squirming in his lap, excited and ready to take his own tests, the optometrist delivered some shocking news.
“Yeah, you really need some glasses.”
“Shit.”
“Bad word!” Harry gasped, “You’re not allowed to say that.”
“Bullocks, then.” Sirius corrected, “Bloody Remus, why is he always right?”
Harry was very brave through the bulk of his tests, it was only when the optometrist had to get up close to his eyes did he grab onto Sirius and squeeze his wrist so hard that he has little half moons indented in his skin from Harry’s nails.
Nevertheless, Sirius was proud of him, and he told Harry so much. Together, they wondered through the store, hand in hand, and picked out their glasses.
Harry picked a pair similar to his dads, round, black wire frames that were almost bigger than he was. He loved them though, and thought he looked amazing in them, and Sirius thought he was too adorable to not let Harry get them.
Sirius picked out some semi rimless tortoiseshell glasses that suited his face well, and didn’t draw too much attention whilst still accentuating his eyes. When he asked for Harry’s opinion, Harry just said, “You look really smart!”
Sirius looked back at his own reflection and realised he did look pretty smart, and decided he should buy them because Remus would probably find him really attractive.
Once the glasses were bought and they both stepped out wearing them, they headed down to the store to buy some groceries. Tonight, Harry wanted to help cook dinner with Sirius because they were having a big family tea. Lily and James were coming over, as well as Uncle Wormy, Aunt Mary, and Lele (or, Marlene, who refused to be called an aunt because she did not feel responsible enough for that title. Harry calls her Lele, and is the only one allowed to do so, because when he was smaller he couldn’t pronounce Marlene, or Marls, or Marlie, so he automatically shortened Marlie to Lele).
Harry got to sit in the trolley as they wandered around the store, and he was very helpful when grabbing the food they needed and putting it all in the bottom of the trolley in a very organised manner. All the cold things were on one side, all the not cold things on the other, all the big things at the back, and all the little things at the front. Sirius was very impressed with his organisation.
“What do you think, Bambi?” Sirius asked, stopping by the meats, “Would you prefer roast chicken, or roast lamb for tea?”
“Uhm…” Harry thought, tapping his chin as he inspected the meat isle, “Lamb because it’s bigger and I’m so hungry.”
Sirius giggled and grabbed the lamb, handing it to Harry to organise in the trolly, “Careful, muscle man, it’s heavy.”
“Woah!” Harry wobbled as he took it in two hands, carefully crouching down to put it where he wanted it to go, “It’s okay, I’m getting really strong.”
“Yes you are.” Sirius grinned, beginning to push the trolley again, “You’re almost stronger than I am.”
Harry giggled, very giddy on the compliment. Sirius adores how easy it is to get Harry in a giddy state, he gets so adorably flustered anytime anyone gives him a compliment, Sirius can’t help but compliment him all the time.
Honestly, it’s probably a little selfish of him, but he supposed it’s a good thing anyway, that he wants to dote on Harry all the time. He never grew up understanding what it felt like to be loved, he never had the adults in his life compliment him, or encourage him, or help him when he got things wrong, so he does all these things double for Harry.
It makes him so incredibly happy to know that the little rascal is growing up with such a loving environment around him, and with so many people who care about him so viscerally. So who gives a fuck if it’s selfish, at least Harry gets to feel pure happiness every single day, and gets tucked into bed at night with forehead kisses and story times, and at least he knows what it feels like to be loved.
He can’t help himself when he leans over and scruffs up Harry’s hair, and honestly, darn Remus because now he can see the twinkle of admiration in Harry’s eyes even better. Sirius flicks him on the end of the nose, which makes Harry giggle, and they spin around the corner to continue with their shop.
“We need to remember to get some mint when we go back past the vegetables, so we can make some mint sauce. Do you think you can remember that, smarty pants?”
“I will try my best.” Harry smiles, standing up and facing the front of the trolly to point Sirius in the right directions, because he’s in charge here, that’s the rules, according to Harry. “Can we please get some pudding?”
“I think that’s a great idea.” Sirius smiled, “What are you thinking? Maybe some icecream? Or something warm?”
“Icecream with lots of toppings!” Harry shouted, turning back to look at Sirius, “Can we have strawberries and grapes?”
“Ooh, that sounds super yummy.” Sirius grinned, “And chocolate sauce and sprinkles too?”
Harry giggled, “Yes please.”
“Lead the way, captain!” Sirius bellowed out, and Harry turned to point him in the wrong direction, and they spent the next ten mineuts getting lost in the store.
By the time they got to the register, Sirius realised he’d forgotten the mint.
When Sirius raced back to the front of the store, to find Harry standing there anxiously with fully packed bags and an impatient cashier, he panted out a quick apology, scanned through the mint, and rushed Harry out of the store with their shopping.
“Sorry, Harry.” Sirius grumbled, switching the bags around in his hand to get a comfortable grip on them, “I know you hate being left up there by yourself.”
“She didn’t even want to talk to me!” Harry pouted, carrying a whole bag of shopping by himself. He looked like he was struggling with it, but when Sirius asked if he needed a hand, he promised he was strong enough to carry it himself.
“Well, she must have sucked. Some people are so boring, aren’t they?”
“Yeah.” Harry moped.
“But, if it’s any consolation, I bought you a giant sized lollipop like I promised.”
“Giant?” Harry asked, bewildered as he looked up at Sirius.
“Giant.” Sirius whispered back, like it was a wonderful secret, “It might even be bigger than you.”
Harry laughed so brightly, almost tripping over his own feet he was so distracted by it, “You’re so silly, Paddy.”
“I know, I know, I’m just the silliest.” Sirius laughed along with him, “You can eat it on the bus, if you want. But you won’t be allowed to eat it when your mum and dad come over, or they’ll get me in trouble for letting you have so much sugar.”
“Okay, I’ll keep a secret.” Harry whispered, absolutely delighted by the thought of keeping secrets from his parents.
“Good boy.” Sirius grinned down at him, “Come on, we’re almost at the bus stop.”
On the ride home, Sirius started up a game of I-Spy, which Harry roped a couple of teenagers on their way home from school into playing. They were two girls, each with hair bigger than their backpacks, who giggled whenever Harry said something adorable.
Sirius only stopped giggling with them when one of the girls made a comment about how Harry had a really cute dad too. Which of course, Harry didn’t pick up on and only corrected them the same way he had that old lady earlier today, but Sirius very pointedly didn’t continue any conversation with them out of pure discomfort.
On the short walk back from the bus stop to Sirius’ house, Harry started to struggle even more with his shopping bag. The big day had started to catch up with him, and the little boy started to get tired, tripping over his own feet and going unnaturally quiet. Not only that, but carrying an entire shopping bag whilst also trying to eat a jumbo lollipop seemed to be a very hard task.
“Oh, Harry, would you be able to grab my keys out of my pocket? I’ve got my hands full.”
“Me too!” Harry groaned. He had a tendency to get grumpy when he’s tired.
“Yes, yes, just put that bag down for a second- here, hand it to me, there you go.” Sirius nodded, taking the bag from Harry, “And hand me your lollipop- good boy.”
Harry reached into Sirius’ pocket and pulled out the house keys, finding the right one to stick in the door, “Got them.”
“Great job.” Sirius smiled, handing the lollipop back to Harry, but keeping the bag, “And there’s all your things back, good job. How about some I-Spy?”
“Okay.” Harry shrugged, too distracted to notice that Sirius had kept the shopping bag. It wasn’t very heavy, it just had a loaf of bread, the mint, some crisps, and a punnet of strawberries in it, but that was a lot for such a little boy. Sirius knew he wouldn’t give the bag up willingly, not wanting to look weak in front of his cool Uncle Padfoot, so Sirius has to get smart about these things.
Luckily, Sirius knows his nephew well enough to do these things smoothly.
They played a lazy game of I-Spy the rest of the short walk home, and Harry cheered up a little without the extra weight in his hands. He was pretty happy to be the one who unlocked the door when they got there, and ran inside to greet Libby the lizard.
Libby was a bearded dragon Sirius had purchased on a whim one afternoon about two years ago. He and Harry had been out on a walk and popped into the pet shop so Harry could look at all the puppies and kittens, and when he saw the lizard he thought it was so hilarious and cool that Sirius brought it for him.
When Lily found out, she was furious. James was laughing his arse off, just thankful it wasn’t a cow, because Harry had previously been asking for a pet cow and he knows how easily Sirius bends to Harry’s will, especially when he pulls out the puppy dog eyes.
Lily said Harry could keep the lizard if he wanted, but it had to live at Sirius’ house, so of course Sirius agreed. At age three, Harry had a pet lizard he named Libby because there wasn’t much else he knew how to say, and Sirius took care of it for him.
The pair quickly unpacked all the bags, gave Libby her dinner, and then had a little break after their big day of walking around. Sirius made them both some tea and biscuits, and Harry did some colouring whilst they chatted.
Sirius got started on the dinner preparations whilst Harry continued to do some colouring, still too tired to help out just yet.
In the lounge, they had Led Zeppelin playing on the record player, because they were one of Harry’s favorites. Immigrant Song is Harry’s favorite, he likes to sing along to the “Ah ah aahhhhh ah” part.
Mindlessly, Sirius chopped up the vegetables for roasting, singing and dancing along to the tunes vibrating through the house.
After flipping the record, very carefully, as he had been taught by his uncles, Harry pondered into the kitchen and stepped up on his little helping-out-stool, and layed all the veggies out on the tray and covered them in oil and seasonings.
“Very good job, Harry.” Sirius smiled, taking the lamb out of the packet, “Go wash your hands again and you can help me season the meat, yeah?”
“Okay.” Harry grinned and skipped off to clean up.
Whilst waiting, Sirius turned the oven on to preheat and washed his own hands at the kitchen sink. When Harry returned, they got to smothering the meat in seasonings together and plopping it on the rack over the vegetables.
“Now, whilst that’s cooking we’ll make up the mint sauce, and then that’s all done.” Sirius smiled, “Should we prepare dessert now as well?”
“I think so.” Harry nodded, “Then we can be more fancy, like a restaurant, when everyone gets here.”
“Right you are, Sprout.” Sirius winked at him, grabbing the mint out of the fridge and instructing Harry on how to help.
They pottered around each other, and Harry did a very good job of stirring the sauce as Sirius quickly diced up the strawberries for dessert. And once everything was done, they got started on setting the table.
Remus came home about midway through their process, smiling at the inviting smell of a roast dinner. The full moon was approaching, Remus was even more appreciative of a good lamb roast than ever.
“Hi, love.” Sirius smiled, wandering over to kiss his partner hello.
“Hi.” Remus melted, kissing Sirius’ cheek back, “I see I was right?”
Sirius groaned, “Shut up- don’t Harry and I just look so flash in our new glasses?”
“Oh, look at you!” Remus smiled as Harry started to show off a bit, “Two very handsome men, you are.”
Harry giggled, hugging Remus’ leg, “Thanks, Uncle Moony!”
“Now, go shower and change.” Sirius said, shoving Remus towards their room, “We’ve got dinner to cook and guests to greet. Go, go.”
“Cute apron.” Remus smiled, backing away, “Pinks certainly your colour.”
Sirius flipped him off, one hand subconsciously smoothing over the frilly apron James had jokingly gifted him one Christmas.
Harry dragged Sirius back into the kitchen just in time to pull the roast out of the oven, and it smelt delicious. So delicious in fact, that Harry actually started drooling as he stared at it.
Sirius laughed his arse off, quickly wiping the boys chin before it dribbled down his shirt.
Once they had both calmed down a little, and Harry’s embarrassment had subsided, they got to cutting up the meat and plating. Harry was very helpful in this process, using the little tongs in the shape of dog paws to dish out all the vegetables into serving bowls, as well as transferring the cut off slices onto a platter for easy serving.
Once the table was all set and ready, and Harry was satisfied with how everything looked, he rushed over to put on some good “eating dinner” music as their family started to arrive.
Together they all sat around the dinner table, Harry at the head with Sirius right beside him at his request, and shared a lovely meal together.
James was almost rendered to tears when Harry told him he picked the glasses that looked most like his dads. Sirius had to hold his hand whilst he sobbed over his carrots.
Once the meal was done, Harry begged for another sleep over at his Uncle Pads because they had the best time ever doing big people things tomorrow. Sirius, of course, agreed, and the both of them begged James and Lily for another sleepover. Besides, Sirius had more mundane things to do tomorrow, and Harry always finds a way to make those things fun.
☆ ★ ☆
Anyway, I love Sirius and Harry’s friendship and I also love the marauders just doing normal people things so I thought why not?
This was great because I haven’t been able to write in ages cause some personal shit happened and my mind has been mush ever since and I’ve had all these writing ideas but no motivation or energy to write so this was really really fun. I didn’t put too much energy or effort into it, you know, it’s a pretty basic fic but I still think it’s fun.
Thanks for taking the time to read! I’d really appreciate reblogs and comments, they always make my day <3
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juuuulez · 8 months
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📰 | epilogue: capulet.
info: Carl Grimes x Saviour! Reader, 6 year timeskip, cute Judith moments, S10 Negan (aka Negan redemption arc), winter vibes because I wish it snowed where I live.
summary: Six years later, Carl and Reader consider what the future holds.
holy shit guys…it’s over! it’s done! writing this was so weird but also i’m very happy with the ending, and also getting to expand on Carl’s character beyond his death in canon was amazingly freeing.
i’ve got some requests to catch up on, but feel free to ask for stuff in the Capulet-canon! i’ll definitely go back to this and do little spinoff oneshots because they r very cute.
i hope you enjoy this as much as i did!
-> masterlist <-
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Snow crunches under your feet as you treck back to Alexandria’s walls. A thin layer has dusted itself over your hair and shoulders, falling from the fabric of your jacket with each step. Slung over your back is a bundle of game: mostly rabbits, some squirrels, all tied up at the feet.
They’d designated you to checking the traps, a fairly mundane job that was mostly bearable, sans when the weather was this harsh. Having a small amount of freedom was nice at times, where you could be alone with the woods, though you knew someone was trailing nearby, shadowing your every move.
It didn’t hurt that much, knowing they didn’t trust you. You understood. But it sucked that it was these random assholes who hadn’t even been there during the war. Since when did they get a say?
Regardless, you felt relief as you arrived back home, if you could even call it that. The gates opened with a creak, allowing you inside, a familiar scene yet twisted in so many ways.
It had been six years since the war ended.
Six years of living in Alexandria, carefully under everybody’s watch. Of being torn down and scrutinised for mistakes you’d made as a teenager. Not that you’d call them mistakes, maybe that was your biggest flaw, being too prideful.
Someone comes to collect the bounty, to which you hand over the bundle, not before untying one of the rabbits you’d personally shot. That one would make your dinner tonight, besides, you’d been promising Judith a lucky rabbits foot.
The man doesn’t speak to you, though you aren’t offended. You’ve never been a big fan of small talk. In your opinion, there are very few you have the patience to converse with, and as long as they were still interested, then nobody else mattered.
Speaking of people important to you.
In the distance, you could spot Negan plowing snow along the main road that ran through Alexandria. You internally rolled your eyes, knowing that they’d been giving him stupider and stupider jobs recently.
There’s another figure, a young boy, who’s been tasked with watching him. He sits on a porch, a few feet away, kicking at the frosty ground.
“Hey, you wanna take a break?” You ask him, standing in front of the young male. The rabbit is still slung from your shoulder, along with the bow on your back.
He looks a little confused with the suggestion, and maybe offput that you’re talking to him. “No, I’m.. alright, thank you.” He attempts to brush you off, though clearly remains wary, almost unsettled by your presence.
You roll your eyes this time, not willing to continue this pointless back and forth. “Fuck off, okay? Just for a few minuets. Go waste your time somewhere else.” You demand.
Only a second of glaring down at the boy and he’s scurried off, likely to tell someone of your hostility. That’s one benefit, at least, that not many are willing to engage in a physical altercation with you, as they’d all heard stories of the war.
As you turn around, you catch Negan already watching you. A smile spreads onto your face, despite his rugged appearance, and the snow all over your jacket.
“You’re gonna be in deep shit for that one, you know?” He tells you, as if it isn’t obvious, though his tone indicates that he is pleased to see you again.
Lately, you’d been finding Negan more often around Alexandria, usually gardening or doing some other boring maintenance task. Depending on who was around, you were even sometimes allowed to visit him in his cell.
It hadn’t been like that for a long time, though. For the first four years after the war, you weren’t allowed any sort of contact. It was hard, and you’d struggled with bouts of depression on particularly difficult days, but things were starting to look up again.
“I don’t really care.” You shrug, smile turning into a downright grin as you approach. “Can’t make me do anything worse than hunting in dead-winter.”
As you crossed the path, Negan’s smile grew tender. He extended his arm to you, palm cupping the back of your neck and thumb moving the snowy hair from your face.
Though he had many regrets, letting you get caught up in everything was the biggest. In many ways he felt like he’d failed his job, which was to foster and protect a young girl. Yet, time and time again, you were put in harms way.
“What about plowing snow?” Negan sarcastically suggests, leaning on the handle of his shovel. The notion made you frown, straightening out the blue shirt he wore.
“No jacket?” You question, brows furrowed while you looked up at him.
The concern on your face made Negan smile, having watched you grow from a reckless teenager to a conscious young woman. “Nah. I have thick skin, doll.”
Regardless, you roll your eyes, trying to swallow your concern as you look to the snowy path. “I’m gonna ask someone about getting you warmer clothes.”
“I should be the one that’s worried,” Negan points out, “Hunting in this weather? It’s like they’re tryna’ kill you.”
He says it with a slightly bitter tone, genuinely irritated despite the fact that you’ve lived quite comfortably in Alexandria over the years. More so than him, certainly. Yet, the concern makes you smile, regardless.
“Someone’s gotta do it,” You justify with a shrug, “Trust me, I tried to dodge. Been feeling kinda shitty recently.”
“Shitty?” He echos.
“Yeah. Just.. bleh, y’know?”
Negan gives you a stern look, “I don’t know.”
You roll your eyes, not wanting to worry him over something you’d already written off as insignificant. “Just feelin’ icky lately, maybe a bit nauseous. I think this weathers fucking me up.
This causes him to let up a little, though you don’t miss the smug grin on Negan’s face as he continues to shovel snow. “Don’t sound like the weather,” He remarks, “Sure you aren’t pregnant? You and Carl are probably breedin’ like bunnies now you’re living together.”
The vulgar attitude never usually phased you, but this time your brow furrowed, glaring over at the man. “Don’t be gross.” You grumbled.
Luckily, Negan lets up, knowing this may be a soft spot for you. “Fine, I’m just teasing, doll. But you’ll tell me if it gets worse?”
“Yeah,” You agree, hoisting the supplies on your back a little higher. “I’ve gotta go get this rabbit skinned. And I’ll see about that jacket, okay?”
In return, he gives you a semi-enthusiastic thumbs up, though you know the emotion isn’t there. It makes you smile. You’ve truly missed him over these years, and seeing the toll imprisonments had on his attitude is jarring.
Nonetheless, you treck further into the community, locating your place. The small house sits near the back end, away from the main commotion, which you’ve grown to appreciate over time. Originally, you stayed there with Aaron, who was tasked with keeping an eye on you.
Then it was Rosita, and occasionally Tara. Back then, you were equally rude and hostile, and made a point to prove your disdain towards the entire situation. Of course, over the years, those walls melted away and you were forced into a state of acceptance.
Now, there was nobody watching over you. At least not in the safety of your own home. With the rate he was over, Carl practically lived there, though you knew he just didn’t like being in his own house with Rick gone. You’d understand how that would be unsettling.
The door creaked when you opened it, the haul causing you to bump it open with your hip. You dumped the bag at the door, and managed to unhook the bow with one hand.
You ventured further inside, intending to throw the dead rabbit onto the back porch to skin it. But you barely made it three steps down before your mission was halted, two arms snatched around your waist and tugging you back into a firm body.
“Jesus,” You huffed, “I didn’t hear you.”
Carl looks down, eyeing the left side of your head, completely flattened with the absence of an ear. “Shit. Sorry.” He apologised, having momentarily forgot in his haste to greet you.
The injury had thankfully healed, but your eardrum was ruined beyond repair. You were completely deaf from one side.
“I’m also wielding a dead rabbit, so watch out.” You remind him, shimming in his hold so that you’re face to face, though you hold the rabbit at an arms length away from his body.
“Then.. is this a bad time to kiss you?” He asks, and though it sounds genuine, the little smirk on his face indicates that your answer doesn’t matter.
You roll your eyes, a smile growing on your own face. Somehow, after all these years, you still get all bashful. “Never a bad time.”
No matter how much time passed, his lips would always feel perfect on your own. Carl kissed you like you were precious, made of porcelain, and the idea that someone was capable of being so gentle excited you. That, and it let you take control, something you lacked in your current life.
You shimmied your spare hand out of the snowy glove, so that you could wrap it around his neck. Lately, Carl had been letting you trim his hair, though you opted to keep it that same shoulder length, thinking it made him just adorable. He wore the bandage less, too, at least when at home.
Coming up for air, Carl pressed another tender kiss to your cheek, holding you a little closer. “Your hand is really cold.” He whispered.
In response, you dragged your palm over his face, squishing the cold flesh into his cheek. He groaned, finally letting go of you, seeeking reprieve from your snowy fingers.
You were finally able to continue down the hallway, though his footsteps followed right behind.
“Do you want to catch dinner with everyone?” He asked, “They’re cooking the rabbits down by the church.”
“I hate everyone.” You point out, bracing yourself against the cold air outdoors. There’s a metal peg hanging from the back porch, which you affix the rope onto, allowing the rabbit to dangle from its feet.
You can hear Carl has stopped behind you, leaning against the back door. “Besides, I think I wanna stay in. Still feelin’ kinda rough.” You say with a shrug.
It’s like a fish on a hook, where Carl can’t resist clinging to every little word you say. “Still? Do you need to see a doctor?” He suggests, worry in his tone.
Trying to ease his concern, you let go of the rabbit, giving Carl your full attention. “I don’t think so. I’m sure it’s nothing. A cold.”
Carl takes this as permission to dig deeper, wanting to find the root of this issue. He approaches, one hand settling on your hip, the other feeling your forehead. Though your temperature feels fine, he still remarks, “You don’t look like you have a cold.”
“Okay, genius. When did you get your degree?” You quip, the snappy attitude earning you an unamused glare, though it only takes a second before Carl is kissing your forehead, where his hand was.
It irritates you to no end that he’s so forgiving. But over time, Carl has learnt that you get defensive easily, expressed in irritated remarks that can turn borderline cruel. It’s his sign that something is wrong, but he needs to back off for the time being.
“I’ll skin the rabbit. You can lie down.” He suggests.
Your eyes narrow into a glare, not liking the insinuation that you can’t handle it. Though, you’re unable to be properly angry, knowing that he is trying to help. “Thank you.” You end up whispering in agreement, setting aside your pride for the time being.
With that aside, you decided to go and clean up from the hunt. There were little bloodstains on your jacket, so you left it hanging in the laundry for now, intending to deal with it later. Your boots were left at the door, and you quickly walked into the bedroom, intending to wiggle out of the snowy clothes.
Your hair was slightly damp, scalp a little sore from having it tied up all day. So, you padded into the bathroom, hoping to have a hot shower. But the second you looked in the mirror, you remembered what Negan had suggested. Albeit jokingly, but he still said it.
It was like a cruel history repeating itself. Being pregnant was a death sentance, in your eyes. Your own mother had died of birth complications, and that was before the apocalypse. That’s not to mention Lori.
Just the idea made you feel sick again. Scrounging through the bathroom cabinet, you found the beat-up packaging of a pregnancy test you’d stashed after finding it on a run. Just looking at it, all decorated in pink, made you feel worse.
You left it on the counter, hoping a shower would clear your head.
It didn’t.
The test was taunting you, staring at you through the foggy frosted glass of the shower. As much as you hated the notion, it wouldn’t leave your mind unless you got it over with. It was time to bite the bullet.
Still soaking wet from the shower, you fumbled with the box, hands shaking as you read the instructions. Whilst you peed into the little cup, you thought back to all the times you’d been intimate with Carl. The pair of you were relatively safe. But, maybe… maybe there’d been a few times you slipped up.
God, Negan was right. The pair of you were animals. It was like a late puberty, you couldn’t help it, you wanted to jump him at every opportunity. And now, this was your punishment.
A positive pregnancy test.
More like an execution date.
You spend a good ten minutes sitting on the bathroom floor, this indescribable weight on your chest. It gets heavier as time goes by, and you convince yourself that you may actually be unable to breathe if this continues.
Pulling on some clothes, you slowly inch from the bathroom, hair and skin still wet, though that doesn’t matter anymore. You can’t tell Carl, but at the same time, you need to.
You come to a stop at the back of the house, and before you can open the door, you notice Judith through the window. She’s sitting on the porch, talking with Carl as he attempts to skin the rabbit. His technique isn’t very good, but she doesn’t know any better. You hadn’t heard her come in, too busy wallowing in your own panic.
She stands, accepting a knife that Carl offers her, attempting to mimic his actions and take a chunk of fur off the rabbit. Judith struggles, not having the right angle, causing an uneven slice through the rabbits thigh.
Finally, you give in, pushing the door open. “You two are gonna butcher my rabbit.”
Judith turns to you, an eager smile on her face. She offers the knife, handle up like she’d been taught, “Show me?”
Though you accept the knife, Carl interjects, “She’s just had a shower, Jude.” He points out.
“It’s fine,” You assure them, rolling up the sleeves of your pyjama shirt despite the biting cold, “I’ll wash off with the hose. Now watch me, both of you.”
You teach the siblings how to properly skin a rabbit, explaining little tips and answering all of Judith’s questions. Though you’d come here to break some terrible news, you somehow find yourself feeling a little better. Watching Carl try and teach Judith something was heartwarming, and you wondered if he’d be this attentive with his own child.
That, and making Judith an aunt would be a gift in itself.
Later that night, you walk Judith back to her house, where Michonne was already waiting for her. She seemed relieved to know Judith was with you and Carl, given the girl had a tendency to investigate into some of the darker cracks of Alexandria.
There was still that one, heavy piece of information weighing on your mind. Though, it seemed to get lighter and lighter as time went on. When it came time to sleep, you were comfortably nestled against Carl’s side, your head resting on his shoulder.
The words were right there, on the tip of your tongue. It would be so easy to blurt out, yet you felt like doing some preemptive damage control.
“Would you ever wanna have kids?” You ask in a whisper, almost completely inaudible.
Given the circumstances, Carl finds the inquiry pretty strange. He shifts a little, laying on his side, so that you’re forced to face him.
“Maybe.” He says, though he sounds a little unsure of himself.
But maybe isn’t a no.
You stay silent for a moment, unsure of how to proceed now that you’ve gotten your answer. The silence causes Carl to grow curious, curious as to what has sparked this sudden interest.
“Do you?” He asks, looking you right in the eye, which makes you squirm a little.
Everything points towards your admission, but you can’t force the words from your mouth. So you just lay there, watching him, looking a little pent up and almost slightly guilty.
Fortunately, Carl isn’t stupid. He’s quite attentive, actually, especially when it comes to your health.
That, and he’d already found the empty test box in the bathroom, crumpled into the wastebin.
“C’mon.” He whispers, pulling you back into him, arms wrapped around your form. His hand makes its way into your hair, fingers twirling in the strands, keeping your head pressed firmly against his chest.
Carl swallows the lump in his throat, similarly unable to address the issue at hand. But maybe you’d rather he didn’t. “I love you, okay?” He ends up whispering, words uttered against the crown of your head.
You muster a little nod, shifting to worm your arms around his torso. You mirror his tone, quiet and hoarse, though that weight is finally beginning to disappear.
“I love you, too.”
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cherryobx · 9 months
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hiiii here to help you procrastinate! I suck at requests but I’m gonna make one and you can just see if you want to use it or not :)) so since I can’t personally hug you since your 24 hours away by car and I don’t have a drivers licence I want something cozy 👉👈 I’ve recently been obsessed with someone and for the first time I followed a twitch live stream because of him and it was so comforting to just listen to him play a game that I could fall asleep. so maybe something like gamer bf/gf and a sleepy reader OR a bookish reader, they’re gaming and the other reading or something. I want the coziness. but I have no clue if this is information that you can do something with so do whatever you want :)) and if you want to use it you can choose the character ☺️
Company || J.M.
Summary: JJ, your gamer bf, comes over and you spend a cozy evening together, sort of.
Word count: 0.7k
Warnings: no knowledge of gaming whatsoever, other than that none
A/N: thank you babe for this request!!!!!! and thank you for supporting my procrastination haha, hope you enjoy whatever this is (don't judge i haven't written anything in soooo long)
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JJ kept all of his gaming equipment at your place. He was scared of what his father might do if he ever got his hands on it in a fit of drunken rage. It was very expensive, he saved up for more than a year to afford all of it. You made space in your bedroom for another table so he could have his gaming station and his own little corner to game in. 
You loved when he was over at your place to play his video games you knew pretty much nothing about. It was a way for you to spend time together. Not in the sense that you were conversing or doing some activity together but just being in the same room with each other, enjoying each other’s company. It was so mundane but so sweet.
He had his headset on but only one of his ears was covered. When you asked about it one time he said he wanted to make sure he could still hear you if you needed anything. But in reality he also enjoyed the little sounds you made over at the other side of the room, whether it was blowing on your steaming tea, turning the pages of your book or the little laughs you let out when a character said something funny in your current read.
One evening he came over to game with his friends. He could tell you were tired just by the way you dragged your feet behind you and how you kept yawning every two seconds. You had a really long day behind you and all you wanted to do was curl up into a little ball under the warm covers in your bed and fall asleep.
He followed you into your bedroom and watched you flop face first onto the bed.
“Are you okay?” He took a seat next to you and placed his hand on your back, rubbing it in a relaxing motion making your eyelids fall closed.
“Yeah, just tired,” you mumbled into the duvet.
“I don’t have to play right now, I can just tell them I can’t tonight. I’ll cuddle with you instead.”
But you insisted. “No. Go game with your friends. I’ll be out like a light in two seconds. Don’t even worry about me.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah. Just come to bed when you’re done.”
“Of course.” He smiled and gave you a small kiss on your temple. 
He helped you crawl under the covers and tucked you in, making your heart swell. He gave you another kiss but this time on the lips. “I love you,” he whispered against your lips before he stood up and sat down in his gaming chair behind the desk you had gotten him.
He turned everything on and logged into whatever game he was supposed to be playing with his friends that night.
His voice was quiet when speaking to his friends, he didn’t want to disturb you more than he already has. He kind of felt guilty about his situation although you had reassured him many times that you aren’t bothered by his stuff in your room. You actually liked that a piece of him was always in your personal space.
“Sorry, my girl’s sleeping,” he whispered into the microphone. It tugged the corners of your mouth upwards in your sleepy haze.
You didn’t really focus on his hushed conversations but the low tone of his voice was so calming and relaxing, it lulled you to sleep in no time.
When JJ finally finished up with his friends, he took the headphones off, placed them on the monitor and quietly made his way to your bed. Lifting the covers gently, he climbed underneath them and joined you in the warmth of your bed. 
He wrapped his arms around you and pulled you against him, stirring you from your sleep.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to wake you.”
“‘S okay,” you slurred, already falling back asleep. JJ nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck, inhaling your familiar scent and feeling the sleep take him over as well.
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meaningofaeons · 1 year
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i absolutely love the way you write jing yuan! can you do some general domestic hcs for him? like him coming home after a long day at work and what'd you'd do together?
or on the weekend, where he doesn't have work, some cute sleeping in shenanigans before reader has to drag him out of bed
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-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈ mundanities
⊹ character(s) - jing yuan ⊹ word count - 803 ⊹ notes - gn!reader
hi anon!! ty for the req!! I'm so sorry it took so long for me to get around to it </3 hope you enjoy !!! (=♡ ᆺ ♡=)
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Now, Jing Yuan is a man of dignity.
He's the General of the Xianzhou Luofu, for Aeons' sake. Though he may nap on the job occasionally, nobody would ever question his status and majesty.
Well, nobody except for you.
It's difficult to take him seriously when he's composed one minute on screen, delivering a speech to the masses with poise and honor, and the next thing you know he's practically flopping into your arms once he gets home, completely deadweight.
Even if you wanted to scold him for throwing himself at you, it's impossible.
The General looks like a puppy when he gazes up at you, sleep-ridden expression doing nothing to get rid of the shine in his eyes upon seeing you.
"I'm home, my dear."
And his honey-like voice soothes your senses the moment he greets you.
He sounds so unbelievably happy and relieved, it's adorable.
Jing Yuan doesn't really enjoy doing anything too excitable or bothersome after a long day at work.
Really, if he had his way, he'd spend every day (working or no) in your arms, snuggled up in bed. Maybe with Mimi cuddling you two as well.
He's not opposed to some activities, though.
If you offer a game of chess or a walk around the gardens of Central Starskiff Haven, it's unlikely he'd deny you no matter how tired he is
But sometimes he will have to gently let you down—especially so if he's already made his way to bed and can't bring himself to rise from the plushness of the mattress.
(If you do end up going out, halfway through the walk or chess game he's probably going to hang off your shoulder and start snoozing lightly)
Jing Yuan can nap and doze just about anywhere and everywhere, but when he's in bed, there's not a chance in Hell of waking him.
Let him hold onto you, though.
Even if he'd rather not do anything at all once he's off work, he's still quite clingy to you.
Will groan and grumble like a child if you need to go on an errand or some such
Tries very hard to convince you to just stay with him.
Please bend to his will!! He works so hard, just let him enjoy the time he has to snuggle up to you
Stroke his hair, run a gentle caress over his face, he'll melt into your touch
Odds are he either gets home very very late and it's time for bed anyhow, or he gets home midday/afternoon and sleeps enough to ruin his bedtime
If it's the latter, he might be the one to ask you to take a walk and admire the stars together, surprisingly.
Jing Yuan is like a cat in that he can kind of sleep as much as he wants to, but sometimes he appreciates going out with you more than cooping up inside!
Now onto the weekends... You can't tell me this man is the worst on days off.
No need to get up for work? To him, that's as good as 'no need to get up at all.'
Obviously, there's stuff to be done around the house, or he made a promise to train with Yanqing that he may have forgotten about once he felt your hand stroking his white locks in the morning...
Not to mention, not only does he not get out of bed himself, but he has a vice grip on you making it so you can't get out of bed.
"Jing Yuan, darling. I need the restroom."
"Mmm... five more minutes..."
"I'll come right back."
"Ugh..."
I swear, if you thought he was petulant about you leaving during his afternoon naps, he's a whole new breed of childish in the morning if you so much as scoot away from him a bit
Forget about getting him up to do any chores or run any errands.
It'd be a miracle if you yourself managed to get out and finish them.
Once you manage to escape his grasp and run the errands you need to take care of outside of the comforts of your home, you will in most cases return to a somewhat guilty Jing Yuan who has taken care of the household chores in your absence.
You had scolded him to get up and get ready to go ten times before giving up, so the guilty conscience it put on him was very deserved, but...
He may be a bit lazy, but he's far from a slob, and he's certainly not ungrateful enough to you to let the household work go unfinished in your absence.
Besides... once your warmth had vanished from beside him, he found it a bit easier to drag himself up.
He's quick to latch right back onto you when you get home, though.
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fae-renjun · 3 months
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OPPOSITE SIDES OF THE CAMERA — h.sh
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ep. 6 — grocery store sushi [𖦹 wc: ~720]
previous | masterlist | next
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you said a goodbye towards your ajar bedroom door, your eyes still fixated on your laptop screen. from the living room came a hurried “bye” in response, followed by the sound of the front door opening and shutting, signalling that yizhuo had left the apartment. karina had left an hour before for her job at the campus cafe. it was silent, the only sounds being the click clack of your fingers on your keyboard as you typed up an email.
on your bed, lying on your stomach, you adjusted your position so you were no longer held up by your elbows, placing your palms flat on the surface of the bed and resting your chin on top. you scanned the email as you proofread it, muttering under your breath to yourself, “…would like permission to use the film studio in the east building-”
your train of thought was cut off by a soft knock at the door. you looked at the clock on your laptop, noticing it was already 3:25. sitting up, you took a deep breath, mentally preparing yourself to interact with hong seunghan one-on-one, something you had never done.
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he knocked once again and you got off your bed, your sock-clad feet softly padding against the floor as you walked to the door. your hand reached for the doorknob but before you opened it, you paused, fiddling with your hair and clothing to make it more presentable. then you finally opened it. seunghan’s hand was up, as if he was about to knock once more. his somewhat surprised expression morphed into a wide smile, his eyes closing slightly in a way you found adorable.
“hi!”
“hi,” you said in response. “um, come in. sorry if it’s a bit messy, you can sit on the couch”
to your surprise, the interaction wasn’t awkward at all, despite your tendency to be closed off and awkward amongst people you weren’t close to. you realised no one could be awkward around seunghan. he, quite differently from you, had a tendency to make everyone in the room feel comfortable, and since it was just the two of you, his demeanour and behaviour helped you open up.
“so i think if you used your hands more in that part, it might communicate better? i always wrote isaac with him being a very physical speaker in mind. he uses a lot of actions and stuff you know what i mean?”
“yeah that makes sense. he seems like he feels a lot very deeply and he’s very expressive? if i’m not reading that wrong-”
you cut him off, “you’re reading it right seunghan. don’t worry. you’re good at this, i wouldn’t have casted you if you weren’t,” you smiled at him and you could see him physically let go of some of his tension about the role. you two alternated between discussing the film and conversing about anything else as if you’d been close for years. it was so easy to talk to him. he made even the most mundane topics interesting to talk about. you discussed your artistic influences, the basketball team he was on, your music tastes, your roommates, everything you could think of. a conversation about frank ocean was suddenly cut off by the low sound emitted by your stomach, signalling it was hungry. seunghan let out a chuckle and you closed your eyes in embarrassment. when you opened them back up he asked, “do you want to take a break and get something to eat?”
“yeah. sorry about that by the way, i just haven’t eaten in-” you checked the clock in your living room, “-about 4 hours.”
“don’t worry, i get it. i’m pretty hungry too,” he got off the couch the two of you were sitting on, “what do you wanna get?”
“um. sushi? we can get it from the grocery store down the street?”
he smiled and held his hand out to help you off the couch, “let’s go then.”
your hand in his made your skin feel like it was burning up, like where your hands connected was a fire. he looked down at your hands once you were off the couch and suddenly let go, looking slightly embarrassed and scratching the back of his neck. oh. okay. maybe you weren’t as completely delusional as you thought?
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a/n: next update is ready and coming in a bit but i’ll give you guys time to process this 😁😁 and be happy with the fluff for a bit 😁😁
tags (strikethrough can’t be tagged): @billiondollarworth @nujeskz @secretiny @soobs-things @talk420 @renjuneoo @flaminghotyourmom @academiq @luffysgfforevaa1 @yujinxue @starwonb1n @icewons @calumsfringe @seunghancore @snowyseungs @yoursyuno @taroddori @miyawwn @https-yeonjun @shoberi @milktea-academia @sseastar-main @p-d1ddy
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© 2024 FAE-RENJUN. All Rights Reserved. Do not copy or steal any of my posts.
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ripcupid · 10 months
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Hey there, can I please request fluff or domestic headcanons for Captain Price, thank you in advance:)
Price headcanons
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first time with hcs so ntm on me
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While he’s away
he’ll try to give you daily updates during missions so yk he’s not dead (teehee) but yk bad service in Urzikstan or just international in general, it has you a little worried when he doesn’t text back for a while
Sending each other pictures throughout the day when he’s at the base and texts you when some trainee or anybody annoys him.
has a photo of you but keeps it very safe away from other people so no enemies know about you and you’re never in danger
if he was to get hurt, he’ll try and get someone to tell you asap
he always promises he’ll come back unharmed (as possible) and will buy you small gift as sorries for leaving especially if the mission took longer then expected
he hates it if he missed something important. like if y’all had kids and they lost their baby teeth or took their first steps he would be so pissed for missing it.
you’ve ever seen those bf who leave a bunch of letter for when they go away? yeah price would do that
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When he’s home
he has to sleep with you so impossibly close to him, he needs to feel the weight of you so he knows you’re there and safe.
idk shit about the special forces but let’s just say he has like ptsd (cause he be killin’ people) and he has like nightmares or insomnia and you’ll be his safe place when he needs to be reminded that he did what he did for a reason.
and speakin’ of insomnia i could see him staying in the living room to not bother you as you sleep but you quickly notice he’s not there and go to look for him.
now happier stuff, he’ll spend every moment he has with you while he’s home just doing random mundane things, like grocery shopping with you or walking the dog with you. whatever it is he wants to do it with you
early morning cuddles when he’s home especially the first day back like he wouldn’t let you out of bed cause like what else do you need to do? 🙄
his job always coming first causes some arguments but it’s mostly you’re worry about if he will come back (he always does)
he wants to be a dad, wants a have a little mini him that he can teach self defense stuff to but the idea of getting “injured” dying makes him hesitant
and if he has a daughter, he’ll be like one of those dads that end up in dresses having a tea party with her and her stuffed animals.
speaking of stuffed animal, imagine him buying you little new ones when he comes home because they reminded him of you
attached to you as soon as he gets home
would try to quit smoking for you and his health
he keeps his work life and personal life separate doesn’t want to talk about what he’s done on missions and even tho he wants to he doesn’t talk about you at work
I think I saw a video like this but I can’t stop think about Price cooking shirtless and you just standing back and watching his back muscles move.
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It was so hard not to make this smutty
Never dones these before, scared rn
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rotationalsymmetry · 4 months
Text
I'm on the first reread of Order of the Stick in a couple years. And tracking how close I am to the current strip by how many years ago it was written.
Dude really slowed down the production speed at some point. But that's OK. The quality is phenomenal.
He didn't have to go so hard. He could have done a joke of the day comic for a year or so and people would have loved it. It was a relatively early webcomic and it had a clean, professional art style, if not a highly detailed or realistic one. (It still takes skill to make that simplified style of art look good.) It's been over two decades and everyone in the main cast has had family stuff and backstory stuff and character development. (And the writer's grown too. It wasn't bad at the start, but over time it's settled into having way more secondary and scenery female characters and the existence of queer people is a mundane background part of the world, rather than something occasionally pulled out for a joke.) We've had high drama, we've had subversion of expectations, we've got the sort of massively high stakes that you can only get in a fantasy setting. And it's been going on for over two decades. I can't even.
And it's so much better on the rereads. Dude will make callbacks to some tiny detail from five years ago real time. The overall plot is solid enough that it's actually enjoyable to condense two decades of strips into a week or two of reading. It holds up. I don't know how he does that. It shouldn't be possible to write something that works as a thing you read one page of a couple times a week and something that works as an archive binge like that, I don't know how it's possible to pace a story to work that way. (Well. Lots of bad puns seems to be a key feature.) QC doesn't work like that, I mean QC is fine but you go back to the very beginning and it's painful how much worse the art and the storytelling was, and it works best if you just understand it as a bunch of loosely connected storylines. OOTS is one story and you can tell where you are in it and how far out the big climax is likely to be. Dunno how he does that. It's been over twenty years. I'm pretty sure I'd be stabbing my eyeballs out if I worked on the same story for over twenty years. That's life's work stuff there.
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citylawns · 1 month
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Any life advice for teen girls? I’m fifteen living at boarding school with no friends, and I’m not interested in the boys here (never even kissed a guy). I’d like to know if you have any tips, or things you wish you did or could change at my age. I’m just very lost and need some guidance, I don’t really talk to my mom so I can’t ask her. She never really taught me girl stuff and I’ve never had a best friend. I look up to you some, I would really love and appreciate some insight.
Hello lovely! It's taken me a while to think about how to reply to this, sorry to have kept you waiting. I was also very lost and lonely when I was fifteen, and I also didn't really talk to my mum, or if I did it was about comforting her or her shouting at me. She also never taught me girl stuff and I've had to learn how to cook, how to clean, how to wash and shave and perform proper maintenance myself so you can always ask me anything in that regard.
I have a few things here that I think might be helpful and things I did for comfort.
Find comfort in art, music, books, films, but in the end don't isolate yourself too much. This is something I have just spoken about unlearning today with my friends. A lot of us tend to retreat into an internal world to survive and it can be necessary and life saving but you also need to force yourself to open up too. It's important to keep taking the risk to open up to people and find friends, even when it goes wrong over and over. It's taken me until 26 to find some real friends. I hope it comes sooner to you.
You can find mother figures everywhere. In older women you meet in your life, in aunties, your friends and partners parents, older girls, in your friends, in work colleagues. You can ask them the things you could never ask your mum.
Devote your time to learning a skill or hobby related to your interests. I wish I had been more dedicated to learning guitar and music theory, you can learn these things at any age (its never too late) but I wish I had the years put in early. It's also a way to find community and friends - music has been fundamental for that aspect of my life.
Please, please don't worry too much about how you look. I don't know if that's something you worry about, but it was something I worried about a lot. I wished my face was different for so many years but you really do grow into your face and your body. As you age you see parts of yourself in other people (your friends, relatives, anyone) and you realise you can appreciate them in yourself too. Insecurity and comparison still happen, but you realise that owning everything about you is the most enigmatic and attractive quality about a person.
Keep a journal. Write about everything you feel and everything you think and all that's happening in your life. Even if it seems boring and mundane. Most importantly - write about what your hopes and dreams and aspirations are. Your older self will need them to look back on to remind her to keep going. And to remind her of how far she has come.
Be your own best friend. Your relationship to yourself is the most important relationship you will ever have in your life. Be kind to yourself, don't say mean things about yourself, notice when you have done something well. If there's no one else to stick up for you and no one to recognise your achievements you need to be that person for yourself. This will get you through everything.
Sending you a really warm hug, stay strong, I hope boarding school gets better.
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