#this isn’t actually the whole thing

[luskbook]

she’s so crazy for this

[ewwww-what]

What a cool dude, I hope he isn’t haunted by memories of his dead friend lol

[shima-draws]

I’m still so mentally ill over the whole Luffy refusing to eat unless it’s Sanji’s food thing. Like. We KNOW how fucking feral over food Luffy is. He loves food and loves eating so much that he steals it off other people’s plates and out of their hands and is so impatient when it comes to meals that he’ll literally try and sneak into the kitchen to mooch before it’s ready. Or he’ll try to break into the refrigerator. I know Sanji mentioned putting a lock on it at some point bc Luffy literally wiped it clean. He will not hesitate to eat other people’s portions or literally an entire meal meant for a whole ship of people! He’s unbelievably selfish when it comes to food and that’s just SUCH a central part of his character that it’s become almost endearing. Even in Totto Land Luffy didn’t think for a second before devouring everything in sight, including an entire fucking HOUSE, regardless of the consequences or the people it might affect. Homie did not care!! He’s food driven first and foremost!!!

Until Sanji leaves him. Until he decides that eating—something that he loves and brings him comfort—isn’t WORTH it unless it’s Sanji’s food he’s eating. It’s been shown that Luffy has zero self restraint when it comes to food so the fact that he was SURROUNDED by food on all sides on a food themed island and utterly refused to partake in any of that? Even though he hates being hungry and will always make eating a priority over pretty much anything else?? The amount of willpower it must have taken for him to sit there and purposefully let himself starve, for SANJI. Even when food was offered to him conveniently (in the form of syrup rain) he stubbornly rejected that. Because it wasn’t Sanji’s food. Because it wasn’t Sanji who made it, who always puts so much thought and care into the food he makes, who always indulges Luffy and prepares extra because he knows how much Luffy eats and how much he loves to eat. Luffy literally took one of the most defining traits he has and tossed it out the window. For Sanji. I’m going to fucking blow up

[hazelnut-u-out]

Somehow never caught this before, but does this imply Birdperson’s mom killed his dad and he remembers seeing it?

The fact this memory is somehow tied to Blood Ridge in his mind makes me wonder if that’s part of why he didn’t accept Rick’s advances— maybe even subconsciously. If that’s what this implies, no wonder he had commitment issues. Makes the shit with Tammy hit differently, too…

I know it’s a throw away moment, but I really hope we get a follow up on that… Regardless of what that memory is, it’s dark shit.

[amaranthsynthesis]

Gortash’s plans always seems to involve a great deal of research and preparation, and Ballard enjoys reading more than many but even he gets bored eventually. He might bitch about it, but he enjoys the company more than he would admit—it takes much longer to reach threats of stabbing than it would with anyone else.

[thejasontoddarchives]

52/WW III Part One: A Call to Arms #1 (2007)

You know you’ve hit rock bottom when you’re standing naked in front of a monument meant to honor a dead version of yourself while you’re alive, holding the Nightwing suit in one hand and the pill helmet in the other

[shibaraki]

brittany broski saying that being asked to ‘address the situation in the middle east’ is ‘dystopian’ and ‘like a black mirror episode’ is insane to me like I’m sorry self-proclaimed feminist and activist, you can bawl at the barbie movie but caring about the living breathing women and girls in palestine is complete ABSURDITY?

[fujii-draws]

OKAY! Chatot rant in tags below! Read at your own discretion.

[starlooove]

Why are y’all surprised that borderline capitalists and liberals like Hobie when they hate leftists, especially black leftists, irl 💀

Real people saying these things make them think and feel guilty, when a real person says we cannot thrive or make significant change by utilizing systems stacked against said change, they have to think about their own lifestyles and ideals. When a real person says violence is the answer and money needs to become meaningless, all they think is “but I could get hurt or in trouble” and “but I’ll never be rich”.

When Hobie says it it’s just a character being entertaining. There’s a bit of truth but you don’t take it seriously because you don’t have to. It’s the same way they’re fine with saying ACAB posts and reading books on anti-racism but can’t muster up the courage to tell their friend to stop saying the n word. It’s all cute till it’s you irl, so ppl who know leftists irl and don’t like them will love hobie. It feels like KNOWING Hobie maybe kinda sorta has a point is enough to negate the idea that their complicity in these systems irl is actually harmful.

It’s like that thing where ppl do bad things and think knowing it’s bad is the same as being apologetic and changing or deserving forgiveness.

Like in conclusion, it’s easy to like Hobie when you’re not face to face with someone like him and you’re not expected to do any work. It’s the same thing as yt ppl liking the Medea movies. God forbid a black person is actually loud in public but it’s fine when they’re doing their little jigs just for you.

[hallwyeoo]

Ellie’s memory of the golfing scene and what it tells us about her.

🚨spoilers for tlou2🚨

I think Ellie’s flashback to Joel’s death is very telling of how she internalized the event and the meaning she applied to his death. It’s also a good demonstration of her relationship to autonomy. Let’s break down the elements that were inconsistent with the actual event:

The stairs/hallway are much longer than they were. This suggests a sense of helplessness, an inability to get there fast enough. Joel is constantly out of reach.

There is blood on the floor outside of the door. Not entirely certain on this one but my hunch is that she blames herself for not seeing more obvious signs of violence/not knowing something was wrong sooner.

The door is locked, another roadblock in her path to Joel. She can’t access him, she can’t help, he needs her and she isn’t there.

Most importantly. Joel yells “Ellie, help me” (which he didn’t in the actual scene, he just screams. He doesn’t say a word in the actual scene)

Ellie hearing Joel scream for her help, calling for her while being horribly beaten, and her being repeatedly impeded on her way to him suggests that what she took away from his death is that she wasn’t enough. They always helped each other, always had each others backs, always got up. Ellie views his death as a failure. She was too slow, too weak, not smart enough to save him. She failed him when he needed her most. She is absolutely helpless to save him, just like she was helpless to save Riley, Tess, Sam, and Jessie (and Marlene, and humanity, and and and-).

Once again, Ellie makes a decision (staying with Riley, going to the fireflies, staying with Joel, being the cure, trying to forgive Joel) and once again her autonomy and ability to find closure is ripped from her.

This is the inciting incident of tlou pt2, this is the moment where Ellie’s whole world shatters the same way Joel’s did at the start of pt1. Ellie enters into the same cycle (which I like to call the “Joel cycle” because… yeah.) that he did, and throughout pt2 she stays in the “20 years later” phase of the cycle. She is changed, she has lost her light, lost what she fought for. She lost her chance to genuinely forgive Joel and rebuild their relationship. She is stuck in a gruelling and violent world that she has no anchor in, at least not anymore. His death is so sudden and so incredibly violent that it practically gave her (and me as well, tbh) whiplash. She’s in a state of total shock.

On another devastating note, this is one of the three times in tlou that we see Ellie beg (that I remember). The first is begging Joel to get up at the university of Eastern Colorado, the second is begging him to get up and for Abby to stop, and the third is begging Abby to not kill Dina because she’s pregnant. (Two times she begs Joel to get up, one time he doesn’t. Two times she begs Abby to spare her family and one time she does. What a beautifully haunting contrast)

To wrap up, every person creates an internal narrative, a story of their life that is crafted from their context and lived experiences. The meaning we derive from those experiences doesn’t always reflect the truth, and that can sometimes bite us in the ass majorly when we experience a traumatic event. We tend to want to find someone or something to assign blame to, some reason or rationale to why it happened. We tell stories. We write them in our minds about ourselves and what happens to us and what that says about us.

But Ellie is wrong. Joel’s death happened in response to a conscious and willing choice he made. It is in no way her fault, and there was absolutely no way for her to know or to stop what was happening. I think Ellie knows that much on an intellectual level, It just doesn’t change how devastated she is over the whole event. It can’t change the fact that she FEELS as though this was all her fault, that Joel did what he did to save her, that she could have saved him. That she should have.

[napping-sapphic]

You should make me fall so deeply in love with you that it’s embarrassing

[jemmo]

ive been thinking a lot about age in the eighth sense, in terms of age gap and the roles of hyung and sunbae and dongsaeng and the behaviours they entail, and the label of the country mouse, and how, with the events of the end of ep 6, they are paralleling jihyun against jaewon’s younger brother with the accident and how I think there’s a crux at the heart of this that is jaewon needing to see jihyun as not his younger brother. and i get that’s weird and kinda yucky considering the nature of the relationship between the two, it’d be very weird if jaewon simply thought of jihyun as a stand in for his familial little brother, but I don’t think it’s like that, it’s not as simple as that.

I think it’s very clear jaewon misses his little brother, plain and simple. and perhaps that extends into missing having a little brother figure in his life, and when I say little brother, I don’t mean familial. that’s why that initial ‘dongsaeng’ messed with our heads in the first place, bc it can be familial and not, so here, and from now on, I mean not. this is not weird incest territory, don’t worry. I think he misses having someone younger, someone to look after. he misses being an older brother. maybe that’s why he so quickly befriends jihyun. attraction aside, maybe he wants someone to care for, and a freshman, a country mouse that knows nothing of the city, being his friend, teaching him city life and uni life, that’s the kind of thing you’d do with a younger brother, and that’s an experience he’s missed. and I think a sense of responsibility also plays into this, bc that’s probably something he feels he lacks after losing his brother. he was supposed to be responsible, supposed to look after him but he couldn’t, and so now he wants to feel like he can be that responsible hyung, he can look after someone, not so much to redeem himself or prove something, but more for himself, to fill an emptiness by fulfilling that role. idk, I don’t think this is something he does consciously, but his body language, his constant touching and how it’s guiding and comforting, at first I thought it was just a desire to touch and filtered through this acceptable closeness between men, especially from someone older. but now i think there is a sense of actual brotherly-ness to it, which I think adds to this confusing want to be close jaewon has that to some degree comes from jihyun filling that younger brother space jaewon has had empty for so long. again, i think people are tentative to approach this topic bc it does get into weird territory, but I think this whole thing is more… how do I say… it’s like how people say you get with someone like your parents, like how often is the phrase “she reminds me of your mom” said between a father and son in movies and tv. it’s not that you want to date your mom, it’s more that you like and value traits that are similar, they bring you comfort bc you’ve literally been raised to be comfortable around someone like that. it’s not incestuous. and I think a similar thing is happening here, even though I don’t think it’s a driving force, I think it’s part of it. which is important, and I like, bc of how this theme progresses.

as the show continues, we see jaewon’s mask slip more and more, and we see jihyun become bolder, which are two important factors that lead into what I think jaewon ultimately needs to realize. jihyun is not his little brother, and he needs to separate the two. there is this obvious path leading from ep 6 where jaewon thinks jihyun’s accident is his little brother all over again and he regresses and distances himself and blames himself, but what he needs to see is that the accident is different. he needs separation. and that comes in the form of jihyun, jihyun becoming bolder and more confident and forthcoming and, most importantly, responsible. at the end of the day, he is not a child, and in that ocean he is responsible for himself just as much, if not more, than jaewon is. he goes into that ocean knowing he’s not the best swimmer and still does it. is he swept up by jaewon and emotions and the kind of heightened vibe of the day? yes. but is it still his decision? yes, and it’s a bit reckless. he can say no to jaewon when he offers to surf and catch the big waves instead of the safety of the shallows where they were before. you’ve seen him bite back and sass and poke and joke with jaewon before, he is not a cowering little mouse (more on that in a sec), and he still agrees, so he has to take responsibility. maybe jaewon was responsible for his little brother but he’s not responsible for jihyun, an adult with their own mind. and jaewon seeing that, that he can’t blame himself when he’s not responsible for anyone here, might just be the thing that helps him get out of that mindset.

and it’s not like jihyun is adverse to this. If anything, I think in this next ep we will hear jihyun blame himself, accept the fact that what he did was maybe a bit stupid and he should’ve thought first. bc we see time and time again jihyun not wanting to be that innocent, naive country mouse. just think about how much he refutes it time and time again, like in that library scene. he doesn’t want to be that person. that’s why he came to the city. It’s why he’s trying new things and being brave, he wants to grow up and be responsible. and I love that this becomes almost a reversal of the classic hyung and dongsaeng roles in later eps, as jihyun becomes more confident while jaewon regresses into himself. jaewon shows his weaker side and jihyun, the younger, looks after him instead. look at ep 6, how he initiates both conversation and physical contact, something we saw jaewon do in earlier eps. I love it both in terms of this theme but also just for romance sake. as an extension of these roles, you expect the older to make the moves and such, but I love that there are equal moments in this show that jaewon gets to be the one getting hit on, be it the scene where jihyun teaches him to draw or calls him cute when he’s drunk. you’d so typically expect to see a hyung doing those things to someone younger, but it shows equality in their relationship that counters those stereotypes in the simple and subtlest ways and I adore it.

this show has a strong theme overall of what’s expected vs how people actually are, be it from drinking etiquette to romance, but just like in that first scene with jihyun’s bar owner, one thing may be expected, but what people actually want, what makes people comfortable, can be something else. and by jihyun so simply not conforming to the country mouse persona initially put on him in such simple but outright ways, he acts as such a great challenge to jaewon, who wears his mask of expectation so frequently. it may be what’s expected, but have you ever considered that it’s not what people actually want? that they might actually want the real you, and all the so-called imperfection of it? bc when does that mask stop being a burden and start being a safety blanket, that shields you from the pain of actually being hurt in a genuine relationship, that hurts more than the pain of pretending. jaewon says over and over again that he’s tired of wearing the mask, but the mask is, ultimately, self inflicted, and as much as you can blame society and parents for expecting things from him, there’s a point when you become an adult where you get to decide for yourself who you are. again, he said it himself, just as he was afraid to leave the safety of the military, he’s afraid to leave the safety of uni, the bubble where what’s expected is clearly defined and can be performed. after that, the rules aren’t as clear. so much more of it depends on you. it’s the process of becoming an adult, of growing up. it’s a process jihyun is on, but jaewon, to be at least, seems further behind in. maybe bc he never got the chance at a fresh start like jihyun and is trapped by preconceived notions the people around him have of him by knowing him for years. maybe it’s bc of the loss of his little brother, and feeling trapped in that time, and a fear of growing up out of that person he was when his brother was there. maybe it’s bc he still feels trapped under his parents thumb, bc despite becoming an adult, you can never really be free of your parents.

I said this before, but it’s just like how they both said they’re jealous of each other, but what they’re jealous of is a preconceived notion of youth and age, not-knowing and knowing, naivety and experience, when again they don’t match these stereotypes. jihyun is not naive, and jaewon doesn’t know everything. Life experience is not all it’s cracked up to be bc it can’t all be good, but knowing nothing isn’t the bliss ignorance is often expressed to be. I’ve rambled on and waxed pathetically poetic long enough about these two to be embarrassing, but as a show that actually involves an age gap, and neither hides away from it nor exploits it for it’s played up romantic tropes, I adore that they let this factor naturally play into the bigger story being told, bc age actually means nothing here, and more than anything, jihyun and jaewon strive to be equals to each other, in their world void of expectations.

[suspiciouslackofclowns]

“Pizza’s on the way,” Eddie announces. He flops down on the sofa, crashing right into Billy’s side and smiling when the little outburst goes unnoticed. “I got mushrooms and cherry tomatoes like you like.”

Without looking up from his book, Billy hums. Turns the page gently while Eddie noses a kiss against his cheek.

“Did you get plain cheese for Stevie?” Billy asks.

“Yup, with stuffed crusts.”

Billy nods once. Zones back into his book, if the way that his breathing softens is any indication. Eddie scoots closer. Glances at the page and implements the five finger rule that Billy showed him — and determines before he’s even halfway down that this book is way over his head.

“Dude, what kind of Old Testament shit is this?”

It takes Billy a moment to finish the sentence that he’s reading before his eyes stop skimming back and forth.

“The Vampyre by John Polidori,” Billy says. “It’s the original vampire novel.”

“I thought Dracula was the original vampire.”

Billy taps the page lightly with his thumb.

“This was like seventy years before Bram Stoker’s Dracula was published. Stoker’s novel is actually considered an adaptation of this one.”

Eddie nods. Leans his head against Billy’s shoulder and wraps his arms around him.

“Then why not just read Dracula?”

“Because I’m reading it next.”

“God, you’re such a goth, y’know that?”

A small smile blooms on Billy’s face as he shakes his head.

“I don’t listen to the music.”

“C’mon, I’ve heard you bopping to Siouxsie and the Banshees before.”

“One of Max’s mixes,” Billy excuses.

“The Cure?”

“Jonathan left his tape in my car and I haven’t given it back yet.”

There’s a slight pause. Eddie sits up enough to look at his partner, quirking a brow.

“Since when do you hang around Byers?”

Billy purses his lips.

“I don’t. He works part-time at the library.”

“He’s showing you music in your car.” Eddie spreads a grin and Billy’s face begins to burn a flustered shade of red. “You have a little crush on him, don’t you?” When Billy doesn’t say anything, Eddie snickers. “You definitely have a type, that’s all I’m saying.”

“No I don’t.”

“No you don’t have a crush on him or no you don’t have a type?”

Billy huffs and waves Eddie off with his hand.

“Either.”

“Lanky brunets,” Eddie lilts. “Typically of the brooding persuasion.”

“You do not brood, Munson, you’re the most bubbly motherfucker on the planet.”

“That’s why I said typically, babe, let’s try and keep up.” Eddie nuzzles closer and chews his lip. “Y’know, mostly based on Steve and Jonathan. Maybe a little bit of Hagan.”

“You’re putting way too much thought into this.”

“There’s definitely a pattern, wouldn’t you say? Lanky brunets…” Eddie wonders. “Brooding, pale skin, brown eyes…”

Billy’s eyes stay locked on the page that he hasn’t finished reading yet, jaw set as Eddie tippy-taps his fingers against the blond’s chest.

“Is your type just… vampires?” Eddie muses.

“Energy vampires, maybe,” Billy grumbles. He dog-ears the page and finally shuts his book, laying it in his lap. “But no.”

Eddie chuckles. Flattens his hand against Billy’s sternum and smooths his palm back and forth.

“Seems like it to me.”

“This may surprise you, but I’m not so shallow that I only care about looks.”

“So…” Eddie trails off. “There’s an outlier.”

“Edd—“

“Who is it?”

“I’m not doing this right now.”

“You’re my boyfriend, you’re contractually obligated to tell me about your hot man crushes.”

Billy presses his lips together and doesn’t budge when Eddie tries to shake an answer out of him. Eddie is about to start more roughly demanding when the doorbell rings, and it derails his train of thought long enough for Billy to slip away from him.

The blond jumps up from his seat to answer the door, practically ripping the door off of its hinges when he opens it. Light pours into the entryway, obstructed by a tall figure.

“Thanks for ordering Surfer Boy Pizza where we make everything fresh except…” the voice trails off momentarily, nearly cut off by the bubbly laugh that exits the guy’s lips. “‘Sup, lil’ dude!”

A hand shoots out to fist bump Billy, which he barely reacts fast enough to reciprocate. Still, the blond spreads a dopey little smile.

“Hey, Argyle,” he greets. Soft, for how flustered he is.

“Man, I didn’t know you lived right here or I would’ve been hopping the fence for backyard smoke seshes.”

Billy fishes his wallet out of his pocket.

“Yeah, it’s kind of a new situation. Still getting settled.” Which is technically true if you count the box that’s been sitting unpacked in the corner for two weeks. “You should still come by sometime, though. When, uh… you’re not working, obviously.”

“Def!” Argyle says. “That’ll be fourteen fifty, bro.”

Billy digs in his wallet for a moment before he slaps a couple of bills in the other guy’s hand, which he trades the pizza for.

“Keep the change.”

Argyle furrows his brows.

“You gave me thirty.”

“Then I guess you have some extra cash for snacks when we hang out,” Billy lilts.

Argyle nods. Spreads a grin as he pockets the cash and fist bumps Billy once more.

“Sweet,” he says, and turns on his heel. “I’ll be seeing you around, lil’ dude!”

Billy waves briefly before he kicks the door shut, turning to walk into the kitchen and stopping in his tracks when he sees Eddie smirking at him from the couch.

The blond’s face turns ten different shades of red in a matter of seconds.

“The pizza guy, huh?” Eddie teases. “I see it.”

“I haven’t seen him much since I left Cali, alright? He just moved in with Jonathan and I haven’t had time to visit.”

“Right.”

Billy shifts his weight on his feet, furrowing his brows.

“Am I under investigation or something?”

“Nerds.”

“What?”

“Nerds. That’s your type. You like ‘em kinda dorky and way too interested in their hobbies.”

Billy scoffs.

“Stevie isn’t a nerd.”

“He’s a sports guy. You can twist it how you want, but he’s a nerd about it.”

“Tommy, then.”

“Too into cars.”

“Jon— actually, I understand that one, but Argyle is definitely not a nerd.”

Eddie chuckles and leans his elbow against the armrest, setting his chin in his hand thereafter.

“How many weed strands can that guy name? More than I can, and I can name a lot.” Eddie clicks his tongue when Billy has no counter argument. “Plus, he’s super passionate about his job. He talked my ear off about toppings for twenty minutes one time when I called in.”

Billy sighs. Sets the pizza down on the counter and crosses his arms, clearly working things over in his head. Eddie gets up in the meantime and strolls over. Gently pushes a stray curl out of Billy’s face before he laces his arms around his neck.

“Jokes aside, I think it’s nice that you like so many different people.”

Blue eyes meet his, and Billy softens. Sets his hands on Eddie’s hips.

“Yeah?”

“Mhm, I mean, you have lots of love to give, y’know? Of course it’s spilling over, sweetheart. Your cup is full.”

Billy chews his lip thoughtfully.

“I never looked at it that way before.”

Eddie leans closer. Kisses the corner of his partner’s mouth while he toys with a lock of his hair, soft to the touch and free of product.

“Glad my ramblings were of use to you,” Eddie chuckles. “Wanna have a sit-down with sleeping beauty after dinner? Talk some strats for getting you out of the friend zone?”

“I dunno if I wanna do that.”

“I’m pretty sure Steve’s had the hots for Tommy for a while now, so maybe we can knock everything out all at once.”

Billy raises an eyebrow.

“You’re not crushing on anyone? I might have to do some digging on you too, Munson, mister hopeless romantic.”

“I’m fine with bothering you two for eternity. I’m actually making it my life’s goal as we speak.”

“Of course you are.”

Billy ropes him closer, pulls him up to his tippy toes so he can press his lips to his neck — one of Eddie’s many, many weaknesses.

One of the others is, unfortunately, being manhandled. Even though Billy is gentle, it sends a thrill down Eddie’s spine when he’s lifted effortlessly.

“Want me to pay you back for the pizza?” Eddie breathes.

He makes a surprised noise when a large hand squeezes his ass.

“Keep your money, baby,” Billy lilts. Low and affectionate and now Eddie is the one getting flustered. “Wanna go wake Stevie up so we can eat and have our little discussion?”

Eddie nods. Shudders when Billy mouths at his throat and holds him ever closer.

“Yeah…” he manages.

Then Billy releases him. Let’s his socked feet touch the floor once again before he’s patting his behind and ushering him out of the kitchen.

Eddie has this sneaking suspicion that they’re gonna do way more than talk after they eat.

[kakarikocarrot]

i want to be able to imagine butch minkowski SO BAD but once i saw that post about her dressing like an old navy mom it became all i could ever picture. on earth she wears khakis (ankle length, narrow but not skinny) and shirts that are halfway between blouse and button down. tennis shoes for practicality but maybe some flats if she’s feeling extra fancy

[kavehater]

I support girls but NAH THIS IS REACHING “if you look carefully LIKE REALLY CAREFULLY 🤓☝️”

[sadlybeans]

No More Batman AU Part 3: Lazarus Pit

AO3 link || part 2

“All ready?”

“Ready and waiting, N”

“Same here”

“….”

“Good, then let’s get this party started… You know what to do, Nightwing out”

The coast was all clear and the preparations were perfect, but just as he was about to step out and finally get the case over with, the ground shook and one of the trucks by the warehouse exploded, alerting the thugs that quickly raised their guns as alarms were sent out. It all happened too fast for any of them to react before it was too late.

“What the fuck was that!?” Spectre yelled into the comms, and Spoiler’s answer came too jumbled with static for Nightwing to make out.

“It’s the bat!” one of the thugs screamed, pointing wildly at the shadows “it’s Batman, he’s here!”

Dick cursed under his breath, but at least they seemed afraid of the thought of meeting the Batman, and they had to move fast now—

“Batman!?” Dick froze. “I’m ROBIN!”

A slender figure, barely a blur of yellow, dropped down from where they had been hiding behind a stack of containers and the smoke of the explosion, kicking a thug as they landed and quickly contorting to evade the bullets, moving as fast as a shadow to put the criminals down.

And Nightwing… Nightwing stared with eyes wide as saucers, breath picking up as all he could see was Robin, his little brother and his wild black hair, the yellow cape that had a chili sauce stain in a corner from that one night Dick saw him last, the same scratches in the front and the chip to the R on his chest. The kneepads that had once been red but the colour had faded into black again, and the gloves that he had stolen from Dick’s old suits because he didn’t quite like how his’ fit.

“N! N, you have to breathe!”

No, no, no, no, no—- Jason was gone, he was dead, he couldn’t be here, he couldn’t.

“Nightwing! Fuck— Dick, breathe!”

Spectre slapped him across the face and he gasped, taking a big breath and chocking on it as the burn of his lungs registered. Through his blurry eyes shapes started taking definition again and he found that Tim was holding his shoulders, his worry visible even through the sharp angles of his cowl.

“Robin… Jay…” he croaked weakly.

“Spoiler and Black Bat have him, you need to listen to me; breathe slowly. One, two, three… hold it”

He gulped and started to imitate how Tim’s chest rose and fell, and slowly but steadily the panic attack subsided and he was left shivering in the cold metal of the shipping container he was half-sprawled onto. It was only then that the girls jumped down next to them with Robin.

He looked up so fast his neck could’ve snapped— It wasn’t Jason. Dick blinked quickly, moisture gathering in his eyelashes and making the mask uncomfortably slick… Damian, arms crossed and lips twisted in a scowl, stood right in front of them all. Robin’s old suit didn’t suit him all the way, he was taller and broader than Jay had ever been, but when his hair wasn’t brushed back and when he was far away enough to overlook his bronze skin they could be confused for one another. Spoiler and Black Bat looked right about to jump him, and when Spectre stood up with his fists clenched, ready to unleash his fury upon the kid, Dick started sobbing.

Clark took a deep breath as he leaned on the balcony railing. The sun was almost gone down the horizon and the house was submerged in a tense silence that could’ve been cut with a knife. In any other circumstance he would’ve taken the time to be surprised and excited to finally, after over two decades finding Batman’s real identity, but the situation was dire.

“I know I’m asking for too much” Bruce repeated “but you and Diana are the only ones I could trust with this”

“Are you completely sure?” Clark finally turned to him, brows crinkled in worry “It’s just so…”

“Impossible? I would think so too if I hadn’t checked all of their suits’ cameras” Bruce passed a hand through his hair and walked back inside the studio to grab his forgotten glass of whiskey and chugging it down in a single gulp. “I can’t leave Damian unsupervised any longer, and I no longer think letting him leave is the best option”

Rao, he was just a boy… but Clark knew it was true, he had seen the recording as well, and he still couldn’t shake the look of the kid’s glowing green eyes out of his head. When his emergency comm rang so late at night he worried, and he’d flown straight to Gotham to find that Bat— Bruce’s kids had gotten into a full on fight with the youngest and most recent addition to their family. By then Damian was already locked inside his room but Dick had still been mid his second panic attack and Tim needed a cast on his entire left arm since it was broken in three.

Bruce was adamant that Talia wouldn’t have lied about the Lazarus Pit, not when it came to her own son. That meant that, seeing as Damian had refused to talk, they needed to find the one other person who knew the full truth; the boy’s mysterious caretaker who he called his ‘baba’. And most importantly…

“Locking him in his room is not going to help” Clark adviced softly.

“I know that, but what… what can I do now? What if he snaps when he’s in school or takes the opportunity to run off? You and I know well that if the League considers him a danger I can’t vouch for him any longer, and I don’t trust Ra’s Al Ghul to not come looking for his grandson. Even worse, when others start realising he’s different, he’ll be a target for many other—“

Clark held Bruce’s shoulders and shook him gently to snap him out of his spiralling.

“I know, just… breathe. That’s it…” he waited until he’d calmed down before he let him go. “Ok so, um, I think we can actually work with this. Damian needs an escort both for his safety and everyone else’s, right?”

Bruce squinted his eyes at him as he let himself fall onto the couch.

“What are you suggesting?”

“Well, Jon’s a couple years younger but fortunately for both of us, he is half kryptonian and could keep an eye on him” He sat down next to him and pat his shoulder “Who knows, maybe he can be a good influence”

For a long moment the billionare stared at him as if he had grown another head. Was he seriously suggesting they let a twelve year old boy supervise Damian? Sure, he was near invincible, but he wasn’t prepared to deal with that of all things.

“Clark— Jon is a good kid, he’s making good progress and all but…”

“…But you think it’s not enough” Clark finished.

“No! No, it’s…” Bruce pursed his lips “Damian is a fully trained assassin, I know he’s just fifteen and he looks innocent and harmless even with the whole… pit thing, but he can and he has killed people. I trained my kids as best as I could and still he bested both Tim and Steph, if it wasn’t for Cass and Dick he would’ve done much worse than just break Tim’s arm. I don’t think even Superboy or Supernova would be safe from him” He stood up again to pace around the study, although there was a defeated air to his desperation this time. “You don’t understand, Clark, I— I didn’t know he had snuck out, I never realised he went into the cave and took Jason’s suit! It was Oracle who told me over two hours later… It was a warning, I told him he couldn’t have Robin so he showed me what he’s willing to do if I don’t give him what he wants”

The more Bruce talked it became evident that he was terrified, he had been Batman and he had thought he was prepared to take in his biological son, only to be slapped in the face with the fact that he was no longer on top of the field… Batman died ten years ago with Robin, and time had kept running for everyone else. They all got better while he chose to ignore all about that world, and whoever had trained Damian had done a damn good job at it.

And he— he hated it. He hated that he could do nothing to fix this situation and that he was scared of his own son. But… god, he was even more afraid of losing another child.

“I think you need some rest” Clark sighed and stood up “I’ll call Lois to let her know I’ll stay and… and we can solve this in the morning”

Breakfast was more akin to a funeral by the time Bruce and Clark made it downstairs, and it was only just after they sat down that Alfred came into the dining room with a serious expression.

“Master Bruce, I believe it’s important that you should know there was a package just delivered for young master Damian”

Bruce paled and at the other side of the table Duke’s head sprung up from the table.

“Did you give it to him?”

“I did, and I made sure the security feed in his room was available” he nodded, offering a tablet to him.

Dick stood up from his seat and ran to stand behind his chair as Clark leaned over his other shoulder, leaving the rest of the kids to pile up behind them.

On the screen, Damian sat cross leged on his bed, staring intently at the small box without moving as if analysing it. They waited for around a minute and were about to give up when he grabbed it and sliced off the tape with a small blade he’d pulled from his sleeve -Dick visibly suddered, he had registered all his clothes personally and thought there was no weapons-. Inside there was a note that he unfolded and read through quickly before he tossed it aside and jumped to get a burner phone out of the box, turning it on and scrolling through it.

The expectating silence in the dining room was heavy and overwhelming as they saw him await for a call to be answered, and then suddenly a voice came out of it, quickly made audible to them when Bruce adjusted the settings.

“-mian?”

The boy’s eyes widened and he held the phone tightly.

“Why didn’t you call?” he snapped then, speaking just as rudely to this person as he had to everyone else.

“… I’m sorry, I had to make sure I was out of sight” the man’s voice was young, but distorted through a voice modulator. “Are you alright? Was your father too big of a jerk?”

“He’s not my father” Damian answered automatically with anger “and I don’t want to stay”

There was a small sigh at the other end.

“We talked about this before, you know that”

“I hate it here”

“You’ve been there for two months, you have to give it time”

“I don’t want time, I want to go home”

As they spoke each their voices was raised in a frighteningly identical temper.

“Damian you don’t have a home anymore” the man snapped, harsh and brutal “So you’ll stay there like it or not”

There was a long tense silence in which the teen didn’t move, staring at the wall opposite to the bed.

“Why did you send this?” his tone was blank as he spoke “Why are you doing this if you’re going to abandon me forever?”

“What— no, that’s not it” the man audibly fumbled as he slipped and a bit of an accent shone through; american. It was gone the next second “I don’t want to do that”

“You’re a liar… you got rid of me the first chance you had, you’re never coming back to get me because you’re sick of me”

“That’s not how it works“

“Then explain it!” he screamed, standing up and throwing a textbook against the wall “You just do shit expecting me to not make any questions! I’m not a child anymore! I know how to make choices!”

“Yes you are! Are you even listening to yourself? You ARE a fucking child, you’re fifteen years old and you have no idea of how the world works! Do you think I can just— keep you? Your mother ain’t no saint and we both know that, she would get rid of me the moment I was no longer useful! What the fuck am I supposed to do to keep the Demon’s Head off our backs just so we can play house and pretend we’re normal people!? All your damn biological family has enough power to take you back in less time it takes you to blink! Hell, even your adoptive brothers have more rights than I do even if I raised you, why can’t you understand that I don’t have a choice!?”

Bruce didn’t know what to feel as he saw his son quietly sit on his bed, silent tears rolling down his cheeks while he held the phone to his ear. It was such a defeated silence from the both of them and he— he hated that he knew what the man at the other end of the line felt.

“…. B-Baba, I want to go home”

Even through the voice modulator the small intake of breath was heard.

“… I know, habibi” Damian let out a chocked noise and his shoulders started shaking “I wanna go home too”

Damian woke up late on sunday after crying himself to exhaustion. On his bedside table the burner phone was charging and a tray of cold food sat right next to it. The door was left open as a silent indication that he was no longer on house arrest, but he made no move to get out of bed just yet. At the end of the day he hadn’t truly gained anything at all… baba didn’t hate him, baba wanted him, but… he couldn’t come for him. From now on he was stuck with the Waynes until his mother decided otherwise, or until his grandfather decided Damian’s time was over. He knew baba would never come back to Gotham… he was too hurt. The Waynes had hurt him too much.

Batman had failed baba but… what if Damian could fix it? What if he could finally clean up the mess and get vengeance in his name? He slowly sat up and looked at the other side of the room where the old Robin suit had been thrown— it had been picked back up while he slept and likely carried back to the cave. That was fine, he would take it back, and then Robin would hunt a clown.

“Damian?” Wayne stood at the door, looking hesitant. “Can we talk?”

His first instinct was to say no. He had locked him up like an animal and likely looked at him through cameras— he hadn’t bothered to look for any to dismantle because he knew it was pointless.

“…” He nodded.

The man took a deep breath and pulled a chair to sit in front of him, fortunately at a safe distance.

“Did you sleep well?”

Damian glared and he winced.

“Yes, sorry about that… We had to make sure you wouldn’t hurt the others or yourself”

“…”

“… Right. I’m going straight to the point, ok? I need you to be as honest as you’re willing. Had you ever experienced an episode like that?”

Damian scoffed and Wayne sighed.

“Do you know why you snapped?”

“Of course I know, I’m not an idiot” he finally replied full of snark “I was awake when I was dipped in the pit all three times”

Damian didn’t suffer from the madness of the pit. In a way, mother and baba suspected he was almost immune to it now. Baba had only been put inside once and he’d become dangerous enough but Damian… well, he was special. He was made by hand, every trait and every little piece carefully selected to carve out the ideal statue, the perfect heir… the perfect vessel. Damian had a use and so he needed to be strong, perfected to the last detail. Baba had only been allowed to stay because he could help him and teach him control.

“Do I have any reason to suspect it’ll happen again?” Wayne looked pale, queasy. So he couldn’t even stomach the thought of everything Damian had lived, after all.

“…. No. Not if you give me what I want”

“I can’t let you be Robin” Wayne refused “I can’t fail another kid like that”

Damian opened his mouth to say something cruel and then stopped.

“What?”

The man sighed and lowered his head, looking exhausted and way older than he normally did.

“When… When Dick became Nightwing, I adoped another son. His name was— Jason. Jason Todd. He was very bright, with an excellent potential, and I… I failed him. The Joker killed him, and after that I promised myself there would be no more Batman and Robin again”

That— that couldn’t be right. Mother had said nothing changed!

“Drake?” he asked.

“Tim tried convincing me and Dick that Gotham needed Robin, but I refused. He only started being Spectre a couple years ago”

“But….”

“I can’t stop them from going out there, but I don’t want them, don’t want you to be in danger”

But baba…

“Why not kill the Joker? Why let him live?”

“I know things for you are very different, but I don’t kill. It’s… I almost wanted to” he quickly blinked to keep tears at bay “but if I did, I would taint everything that Jason died for”

Baba didn’t need a legacy, he wanted to say. He just wanted his dad to love him and miss him, he wanted his family to notice he was gone… and they never did. Even now they hadn’t bothered to check his empty grave?

“Damian, this is the one thing I can’t give you, so I need you to promise you won’t try to steal my dead son’s suit again. Can you do that?”

…Ok.

I’m sorry baba, I promise I will be careful and follow everything you taught me. I know you will be very mad but if Wayne can’t do this then it has to be me— it’s the least I can do. Call me back when you see the news, but remember I’m being watched.

Damian sent the voicemail and put down his burner phone with the screen down right next to the keyboard, taking a deep breath. The school’s library was nearly empty and his chosen corner offered no room for anyone to sneak up behind him without him noticing, keeping the screen of the computer concealed. He cliked the bright blue button and waited for the slow internet to load.

Seventeen pictures, all badly taken and blurry but still unmistakably the Robin that had been missing for ten years, were posted for the world to see.