paisagemnajanelagt

[impala-67-zeppelin]

love how richard armitage not only enhanced thorin oakenshield’s gayness, but also, his fantasy autism.

[harrypoppinss]

How the Dwarfs show PDA

Thorins company x gn!reader

Warnings: an insane amount of fluff, implied smut

Thorin

Being the King of Erebor meant that he had a lot of responsibility on his plate. Even before the Dwarfs defeated Smaug and reclaimed Erebor, he wasn’t overly affectionate publicly; that didn’t change once he re-built his kingdom. Kissing is a no go, but instead he would just always have you hold onto his arm as you walked, or vise versa. But when you’re alone in your shared chambers, its like he can’t get enough of you. Thats when he always makes up for the lack of attention and affection that he can’t openly show like he wants to, but if he sees someone flirting with you then thats thrown out of the window; literally. He will pull you up onto his throne and make-out with you infront of everyone if he wants to… and he has… many times. But most of the time; not very into PDA.

Fíli

Like his Uncle, he has a lot of responsibilities since he’s the heir to the throne. But he doesn’t let that stop him. Once he’s done with his daily duties as the prince of Erebor, he gives you his undivided attention and affection. He always makes sure you’re able to stretch your legs, so he usually like to take late night walks through the mines as you two attempt to not be seen by the guards. One time though you did get caught doing… something. But that’s a story for another day and time. Sometimes he will literally just slip away from the meetings to go and be with you but only if Kíli is there to cover for him. He doesn’t have a problem with showing you how much he adores and loves you, even if that means getting his head chewed off by Thorin for skipping his royal duties.

Kíli

This man is literally the definition of PDA. He doesn’t have as many duties as his brother so he gets to spend his free time with you. He doesn’t care who watches you two as you walk through the halls of Erebor with his arm tucked tight around your shoulders; paired with a proud grin on his face that reads “yeah thats right they’re mine”. He doesn’t care if his Uncle scolds him for it, you’re his one. He tends to pepper kisses all over your face at random times, which inturn makes you incredibly flustered, sometimes his own brother has to pry him off of you. He’s just a lovey-dovey type of boyfriend and he is not afraid to show it to the whole Kingdom of Erebor.

Dwalin

Not a fan of PDA at all. However, if he sense that you’re having an off day, or if he sees someone openly flirting with you…. well then it’s like he’s a whole new person. He’ll pull you into his chest as he rubs circles on your back, giving the person that was attempting to flirt with you a death glare and grinning when he watches them basically shit their pants and scramble away. If its the scenario where you’re having an off day he will find someone to cover for him most of the time with a threat before taking you back to your shared house as he gives you his undivided attention and affection. All in all; this man can quickly become the worlds biggest simp for you.

Bofur

Like Kíli, he’s the definition of PDA. As soon as he gets home from work he’s all over you; literally. He will physically jump on top of you if you’re ignoring him, especially after a long day in the mines. Which usually leads to you forcing him to get up off of you so you can fix him a bath. Even when you’re doing that, his hands are wrapped around your waist as his chin rests on top of your head. In public it doesn’t change, his fingers are laced with yours and he’s constantly finding an excuse to kiss you. You have something on your lips? Kiss. You turn to look at him? Kiss. He wants your attention? Multiple kisses. He just adores showing you how much he loves and cherishes you, even during the journey to reclaim Erebor.

————————————————————

A/N:

Where to request a prompt for a character from LOTR/The Hobbit, Supernatural, The walking dead, FNAF? Here!

The masterlist? Here!

The prompt list? Here!

[mithrilhearts]

As The Tide Turns

bagginshield | pirate au | teen+

The lost treasure of Durin the Deathless has been sought by many and found by none, but to Bilbo Baggins, it’s merely another riddle just waiting to be solved. The self-proclaimed “Deathless” expert finds himself whisked away aboard The Ravenheart, led by the infamous Captain Oakenshield, and the two embark on an unexpected journey to solve one of history’s biggest mysteries.

Chapter 5

“We’re to head north, and beyond the mangroves will be what you seek,” Bilbo pointed out proudly, tapping a finger against a laid out map upon the main deck. Thorin was hunched over it, studying it, and not looking too enthusiastic about their course. “You look glum.”

“Mirkwood is the last place I wanted to go,” Thorin growled, his eyes hard focused on the mapped out lands and waters of the elven kingdom. “But what I feel here matters little, so long as you’re positive we have to suffer the mangroves.”

Thorin’s glare was far more threatening than that confusing dose of flirting from earlier, making the two interactions very different and recognizable to Bilbo as he waited a moment to reply—neither afraid, nor uncertain in what he was saying. “I’m positive. I’ve practically memorized your map, as well as mine, and how they differ, it all points north. From there, we will find your key.” The lack of response was fine, Bilbo wasn’t worried, and Gloin was continuing to sail them in the right direction.

It was once they got to the shallow shores leading into Mirkwood, that was where Bilbo grew clueless. Having never left the Shire before, his knowledge of outside kingdoms dwindled, but he was certain he’d catch on, or at least pretend like he knew what was going on. According to some murmurings and background knowledge, Mirkwood was not a place to trifle with.

Taglist beneath the cut. If you want to be added or removed from this list, please let me know! Reblogs are appreciated! 💖

@conkers-thecosy @thedragonsmaug @elvain @lucigoo @glamdolf @cilil @thetempleofthemasaigoddess @hotgyros69 @mirkwood @hermoonself @myeaglesong @yacrimago @mysandwichranaway

[undreaming-fanfiction]

(likely a modern AU so the timeline fits)

Eddie feels so very, very torn about the Hobbit movies. He loves the music and hums "the Misty Mountains Cold" before he can catch himself, but he not very silently screams about all the crap that was added for no reason and, the bad CGI? A travesty, your honor! He glares at the screen when Legolas appears and utters "where the fuck did you come from?", he loves the casting choice for Bilbo but absolutely roasts the idiotic way that the screenwriters butchered Bilbo's relationship with the dwarves and the way it evolved.

But the thing he never forgives those movies for is that unbelievably idiotic love triangle and the way it made others tear up when Eddie's soul temporarily left his body to punch Peter Jackson. Because it DOES. NOT. MAKE. SENSE. There was no development. The flirting was bad, trust him, he knows what good flirting looks like and this ain't it. Eddie hates it with passion, especially the scene that overshadows the incredibly powerful one with Thorin's death. He is PISSED. The scene is so so SO lazy and Thrandúil did not deserve this disrespect. Shit, even the weird added ginger elf Tauriel did not deserve it. Yes, we're talking this scene:

Eddie mocks the shit out of this. He gobbles up all the memes and there is a 50/50 chance in the months after he saw the fateful scene that his contempt for it would bubble up.

"Hey Eddie," asks Steve whe he sees Eddie between moving boxes when they finally find an apartment together . "Why aren't you packing?"

And Eddie, instead of saying "I'm taking a break," clutches his chest and chokes out, "because it was real, Steve!"

When Eddie goes to buy groceries and Steve unpacks them, he notices that Eddie bought two bags of potatoes instead of one. "Why did you get two?" he asks.

Eddie rummages through his pockets and produces the receipt. "Because the discount was real!" he says with a mock sob and points at the potatoes being 30% off.

And Steve is a patient man, he really is, but when Eddie tells him that the claws were real as a response to his question why is Eddie all scratched from their cat and refuses to elaborate, he threatens that if it doesn't stop being real, he's going to get a set of the Hobbit movie posters for his side of the bedroom and proudly display them.

Eddie bitches, moans, threatens, but eventually he moves past the idiotic love triangle.

When they lie together, falling asleep, Eddie mutters into Steve's neck "I can't believe that stupid threat worked on me. Why would you even thing about something like that?"

Steve turns to him with a deadpan expression and says:

"Because it was real."

[justsomerandomfanfic]

The Siren's Song - Fili X Female Reader

Title: The Siren's Song

Fili X Female Reader

Additional Characters: Bilbo (Mentioned), Thorin, Kili, Bofur, Bifur, Nori, Ori, Bombur, Azog (Mentioned), Other Hobbit peeps (Mentioned), Gandalf (Mentioned), Smaug (Mentioned), and the rest of the Company (Mentioned)

WC: 3,223

Warnings: The Hobbit canon violence, death of main characters mentioned, Reader is a Siren, murder mentioned, flesh-eating fish mentioned, yelling, fighting (verbal), flirting, sassy/sarcastic Reader, blood mentioned, weapons mentioned, crying, angst, threats, orc death (yay), vomit mentioned, Everybody Lives AU, and fluffy ending

The company had been walking for hours it seemed. And they probably had been walking for hours, but the point is that their feet were hurting and they were in dire need of some rest. Though, as stubborn as the King was, Thorin kept going. 

"No time for rest," He'd say as most of the company groaned, "We must make it to the next town before sundown." 

But it had been hours. Walking and walking. They didn't even have ponies to ride on, and their backs hurt as they carried their heavy bags, supplies, and weapons. They wanted a break, they needed a break. Yet, their King wasn’t as merciful.

As the hot afternoon sun shone down on the Dwarves and one Hobbit, the bright forest they were wandering through, turned into a misty dark wood. The aura and atmosphere of the forest changed drastically with the change in temperature. The air was cooler as well as the smell, and the leaves crunched underfoot with every step they took. 

Then, suddenly, the air turned freezing cold. It felt like an icy blast hit them all at once, making it feel as if they were standing on a high snowy mountain. They stayed quiet, wary of everything around them, even some pulling out their weapons, just in case. The company looked around, trying to find any sign of danger.

"Be still." Thorin commanded, his eyes narrowing as he looked around him, "Be at the ready for anything."

Then, suddenly, there was singing, coming from somewhere ahead of them. The song was enchanting and sweet, and it made the Company feel slightly more at ease. It was beautiful and melodious, almost like a lullaby; it sent shivers down the Company’s spines.

Fili felt his heartbeat quicken as his mind began to fog, and he couldn't seem to keep up with his thoughts. His head swam with emotions. Was it really a song? Was it just his imagination? He could see himself humming along to the melody, swaying back and forth… It was hypnotic and entrancing. Fili felt as if he was walking on a cloud, as his eyes drooped in a heavy daze until he stopped; pausing mid-step. The fog in his head slowly dissipated, as Fili blinked rapidly; confused. He looked around in panic, watching as the rest of the Company, even his Uncle, slowly, sluggishly walked towards a large lake.

Hypnotized, the Company headed straight for the dark lake, which seemed to be the source of the voice they were all hearing. The water was dark, deep, and misty; however, they didn't care about the lake -- they were all too enthralled by the beautiful song that came from within its depths.

Fili, who had broken free from the hypnotizing song, noticed something as he stared at the lake. Near the middle of it, there was a face, peaking out of the murky waters with bright eyes.

Fili watched as the eyes widened when he realized that the Company was walking closer and closer to what he realized was a Siren. He ran over to the front of the lake, pushing Thorin away from it just in time. Thorin's glazed-over eyes blinked, as he snapped out of his hypnotized state. He quickly realized the severity of the situation and with the help of his eldest nephew, they shook awake the rest of the Company.

"Oh..." The Siren from the waters sighed, "You're no fun." 

Thorin turned and glared at you, "What did you do to us?" He demanded and you sighed, rolling your eyes.

"Hypnotized you with my song." You said simply. "A girl's gotta eat."

Kili furrowed his eyebrows, "You eat Dwarves?"

You let out a hauntingly beautiful laugh, "Oh no!" You giggled out, "I hypnotize people to become bait for me to eat. I sing, lure unsuspecting victims in, pull them into the lake, and then the flesh-eating fish will feast on you... While I feast on them."

There was a tense silence after you finished speaking. Then, Thorin spoke up, "Well, you are not going to turn us into a meal!" He exclaimed, making you roll your eyes in annoyance.

"Well, I can't now. For one of you Dwarves has broken out of my spell." Your gaze slid over to stare at Fili before you slipped into the waters below. Fili looked around the lake before you popped out of the water, right in front of Fili; surprising him. "How did you do it?" You tilted your head to the side, your wet hair matted to your head, and parts of your face. "You should have drowned. How do you escape my enchantments?" You questioned. Fili opened his mouth to respond, but he closed it again. His heart was racing, and the blood rushed to his cheeks. You were the most beautiful creature he had ever laid eyes on. You smirked when you noticed and laughed softly. 

Thorin pushed Fili behind him, pointing his sword right in your face, making your eyes cross. "Stand back, Siren Temptress." He growled, "Or else we shall skewer you where you stand!"

Your eyebrow raised, amused. “Tempress?” You asked. Fili was shocked at how calm you sounded, despite being threatened, but also surprised at how little effect the threat had. “No one's ever called me that one before. I must say... I like it. But then again, no one's ever fallen out of my spells before." You smirked, tilting your head to the side to stare at Fili again; something about him fascinated you.

"I do not know." Fili answered, "I just felt this pull, and I could think again."

You hummed, "Well..." You ran your gaze across his figure, "You must be special." You mused. "So... Where are you all heading?" You asked and Thorin brought your attention back to him.

"Do not speak as if you had not tried to kill us all."

You glared up at Thorin, pushing the tip of the sword away from your face, "Do you not know that it's quite impolite to point a sword at a lady?"

Thorin scowled, "And yet you tried to harm us!"

"Now, now, Thorin. You play too rough," You chastised, placing a finger on your lips coyly, "That's hardly fair. I didn't mean to harm anyone. It's just my nature." Your brows lowered and you pout your lips.

His glare seemed to harden as he stared at you, "How do you know of me?"

"Oh, your reputation precedes you... Your Highness." Your words dripped with sarcasm and you chuckled, flicking your tail out of the water when Thorin flinched. That comment had hit a nerve. "I may be able to help you, you know." You hummed, eyes slyly dragging your gaze from Thorin to Fili. "I can hypnotize others. You might need me." You let out a dramatic sigh, “And, I’d just love to get out of this lake.”

Fili felt a slight chill run down his spine and he swallowed nervously; he couldn’t stop staring at you. "No! No, you will not come with us." Thorin yelled, as Kili nodded beside him.

"We can't have a Siren join the Company!" Bofur cried out as most of the other Dwarves nodded in agreement.

"I do not know..." Fili began, his eyes staring into yours, "She might be helpful."

The Company turned to look at the elder Prince, eyes wide in shock. "What!? Have you gone mad!?" Bifur exclaimed.

Nori nodded, "She'll eat us to bits, one by one!"

"He must be under her spell!" Ori shouted, backing away from you.

"Why would you want to help us!?" Bombur shouted.

"If we go with her, we all die!" Bofur yelled, trying to get through to Thorin.

Thorin ignored them as he stared at you, narrowing his eyes, "If you step one toe out of line, I will not hesitate to skewer you." He stated firmly.

Your eyes flashed gold, and you grinned devilishly, "Good thing you won't have to."

Your eyes flickered back to their original color, and you dipped the rest of your head back in the water. Fili furrowed his eyebrows as he stared at the water, confused and curious. He, and the rest of the Company, watched as the water bubbled as if it was boiling hot, and then, you rose out of the surface. Instead of your tail, it was replaced with legs, and thankfully whatever magic you used, had given you clothes. A simple billowy tunic, trousers, and boots. If anything, you were also ready for the adventure.

Thorin stared at you, skeptically before going ahead of the group, and leading the way. You saddled up beside Fili, incredibly intrigued by the Prince, and how he was able to break out of your spell. What was special about him? Was he truly immune to your charm? But, the longer you stared at him, the more you realized how handsome he was. His dirty blonde hair, striking blue eyes, and his little mustache braids… There was a sort of magnetism that drew you to him and made you feel like you wanted to be near him. It was strange.

"What should I call you, little Prince?" You asked, gaining his attention.

Fili turned to see you already looking at him, walking alongside him as you clasped your hands behind your back. "I am Fili." He introduced himself, face still flushed, "What is yours?" He asked, turning to face you.

"My name is Y/N." You replied, grinning.

Fili smiled at your response, "It suits you better than Siren."

"Hm. Or Temptress." You added, making him laugh lightly. Fili bit his lip, side-glancing at you with a playful smirk. You frowned slightly, "What are you grinning about?" You asked.

Fili shrugged, "Nothing really, just your company is nice."

"Is that so?" You raised an eyebrow teasingly, as Fili nodded.

"Yes."

You stopped and stared at him for a few moments before smiling, "Good. Because I think you are nice company too."

Kili couldn't help but overhear your conversation with his older brother, smiling slightly in amusement at the two of you. 

~~~

Over the past couple of weeks, you had grown closer to the Prince and grew to actually really like him. He was a good person, and he cared very deeply about the people he cared about. You admired that about him. You were starting to notice things about him that you hadn't noticed before. The way he twiddled with his thumbs or how his demeanor changed when near his brother…

You liked seeing Fili happy, you enjoyed spending time with him, and you found yourself falling deeper and deeper with every passing day. You knew that you were in deep, but you didn't care. All you cared about was Fili. You'd been keeping that thought to yourself though. For fear that he might think of you differently if he found out that you had feelings for him. You didn’t want to say it… But you would show him with your sweet gestures.

"What is it like, wandering and going on adventures?" You asked softly, not wanting to wake any of the sleeping Dwarves or gain the attention of Kili who was on night watch.

Fili hummed, staring up at the stars with you, side by side, "Well," He began, "Sometimes it is dangerous, but other times it is quite... Peaceful." He glanced over to you, seeing how your eyes gazed upon the sky. Your face was illuminated by the light coming from the fire which lit up the small area in which the Company had set up camp. You were beautiful, especially with the moonlight shining off your skin. Like a Goddess sent from Mahal himself.

You glanced over at him and looked away shyly. "I wish I could've seen the world more. All my life, I have been in that lake, doing as my parents had taught me." You paused, your fingers playing with the hem of your shirt. "I never thought I would get the chance to see the world." You continued. Fili turned to face you, frowning slightly in concern.

"I understand." He murmured. "For a long time, I wanted to go out on adventures when I was younger."

You bit your lip, before turning your head to the side, looking at Fili, "I'm sorry for almost killing you and your friends."

Fili shook his head, "There's nothing for you to apologize for. It was your nature." You smiled sadly, nodding slightly in understanding before looking back at the starry sky. "What is it like being a Siren?" Fili questioned, breaking the silence between the two of you, "Being able to change your form?"

You blinked, your thoughts suddenly taking a turn. "It is very tiring. To say the least. Swimming all day… It takes a lot of strength." You looked back over at him, "What is it like being a Prince?"

A sad sigh escaped Fili's lips and he glanced up at the sky, "It's difficult, I suppose." He paused, "But I wouldn't trade it for anything." He gave you a small grin. 

"Are you happy?" You asked him, and Filipused his lips, thinking before he nodded.

"Yes, I am happy." He looked back at you with his blue eyes, "Are you?"

You sighed, turning to look up at the stars as a shooting star flew by, "I am now." Your hand brushed against the soft grass, your hand bumping lightly into Fili's. His pinkie nudged yours, making your heart flutter. Slowly, his hand encased yours, and he squeezed gently, earning a small giggle from you.

"You're adorable." You said, giggling as he rolled his eyes playfully as his cheeks flushed once more.

"And you are enchanting, Y/N."

~~~

The Battle of the Five Armies was ongoing. There was so much blood and gore. You spent most, if not all of your time in your lake, so you never saw a battle like this before. You were doing your best to help Thorin and his Company, hypnotizing and mesmerizing orcs, forcing themselves to walk off cliffs or stab each other. The fighting was brutal, there was no mercy whatsoever. All dwarves, even though injured or wounded, refused to yield. It was overwhelming. But as you continued to sing, luring a bunch of orcs to kill one another, you took a glance around you, unable to find Fili; you went in search of him. 

You began to panic when you made your way to the castle ruins up high on the mountain, eyes widening as you watched Fili, being held by Azog on the broken balcony of the ruins. You froze, petrified as you watched Azog stab Fili in the back, before tossing him away. You screamed as tears streamed down your cheeks. Your blood-curdling scream echoed throughout the mountain, causing many to cover their ears as they began to ring; even some vomited from your piercing yell. You quickly rushed over, falling down on your knees, pulling Fili close to you, his head resting on your lap. Tears streamed from your eyes as you looked down at his pale form. A large pool of blood surrounded him, staining your pants and knees; but you didn’t care. As you looked down at him, you began to sing again, hoping that your song would somehow heal the wound on his back. But nothing happened. Your heart clenched painfully. You began to shake as you gazed at him helplessly, watching as your song slowly faded away, leaving a dead silence in its wake. 

Opening your eyes, you stared down at Fili's glazed-over eyes, your chest tightening, a painful lump forming in the pit of your stomach. Your breath hitched, choking back sobs as you placed your palm against the side of Fili's face. His cheek felt cold against your fingertips, making a whimper escape your lips. Biting your lip harshly, trying to stop yourself from crying, you pulled Fili close to you, placing a gentle kiss on his forehead.

"Please... Don't leave me." You whispered in his ear, and you shut your eyes, letting out a shaky sigh.

Unbeknownst to you, the tears you had shed landed on Fili's cheeks, melting into his skin. And after a quick moment, he let out a faint groan, his eyes flickering open. Your eyes widened at his sudden sound, sitting upright as Fili let out a cough, wincing.

He opened his eyes, gazing up at you through half-closed eyelids. "Y/N?" He rasped. You looked at him, relief flooding over you as he sat up in front of you. You cupped his cheek, leaning forward, and placed a light kiss on his lips.

"You are awake." You breathed. He grinned softly.

"Am I dreaming? Is this real?" Fili asked, gazing intently at you.

"No, you're here. With me. You're alive." You responded, pressing your forehead against his own.

"I'm alive? How?" He asked softly, and you shook your head slightly.

"I do not know." You muttered, "But, I am oh-so glad you are alright." You let out a small laugh of relief.

"Me too, my Y/N." Fili told you, bringing his hands up to cup your face, and then pulling you towards him, kissing you tenderly. You returned the kiss, feeling relieved, and happy to finally have him back in your arms, safe and alive.

~~~

Thankfully, after the battle, Azog was killed by Thorin, and the battle for Erebor was won. Smaug was dead. And everyone, even the rest of the Company survived. You were currently lying beside Fili, who was snoring lightly while you traced circles onto his forearm, smiling slightly. Living in Erebor with your beloved was a dream come true. With help from Gandalf, you had found out about your merpeople. Along with that, you had found out the reason why Fili came back to life. Your tears. Your magic tears. Something you didn't even know about yourself. Which you were beyond grateful for.

You had fallen in love with Fili. He had fallen for you. You both loved each other so much that neither one of you ever felt like you could live without the other. You both were inseparable, never without each other; always be each other’s side. He was everything you needed and ever wanted. You loved him. You truly did. 

Fili stirred beside you, opening his eyes and staring sleepily down at you. You reached up, stroking his cheekbone with your thumb, a small smile gracing your features. "Hey, you're finally awake." You commented, brushing some strands of hair away from his face before fidgeting with his courtship braid.

Fili yawned, "How long has it been?"

You shrugged slightly. "Since we went to bed last night." You answered, flicking his mustache braids playfully. "How are you feeling?" You asked curiously.

Fili groaned lightly, reaching his hand up to cup your cheek. "Perfect." He replied, chuckling tiredly, his thumb running soothingly across your cheek. His eyes landed on yours, gazing dreamily.

"Good," You whispered softly. Fili chuckled lightly as he leaned forward, capturing your lips, kissing you passionately, and wrapping his arms around your waist. You smiled into the kiss, tilting your head slightly to deepen it. Pulling apart slightly, you rested your forehead against his. "I love you." You mumbled softly.

"And I, you, my Y/N." Fili smiled, pecking your lips softly.

[fizzyxcustard]

Jealousy.

Masterlist of this series

Comments/Notes/Housekeeping: Thank you to everyone who reblogged and commented on my last of the RA Character Headcanon Series. I appreciate it very much. I know I sound like a broken record, but please do consider a reblog if you like a post, and if you wish to be added on to my tag lists, please let me know. You are also very welcome to request head canons as well, so I can continue on with this series and open it up to a lot more scenarios.

This head canon post was requested by @sunflwrnsunnieshine Thank you very much, hun. You're very welcome to request head canons with these 9 characters. Just send the request via my ask box, please. This instalment will focus on how all the characters handle jealousy, more precisely, jealousy which involves you, the reader. Enjoy!

GUY OF GISBORNE: Guy does not handle jealousy at all well when it comes to other men flirting with you. He makes his complete and utter distain known to the other man, and even becomes threatening. Most people are scared of Guy, so the men back off as soon as they see his icy glare from across a room. You know that Guy's jealousy comes from a place of insecurity, so you need to remind him regularly that you only have eyes for him.

RAY LEVINE: Ray Levine holds a lot of his emotions inward and will become distant with you if he feels there may be any kind of hint of another man sniffing around you. His answers become clipped and short, and it's up to you to question him thoroughly to see exactly why his mood has changed. However, when you reassure him that you're his, he apologises profusely.

FATHER LORENZO QUART: Father Quart is not a jealous man, but when it comes to you, jealousy is not something he is immune to. He holds it inward and tries his best to push the thoughts away as to not fall into bitterness. You notice his behaviour (of extra glances and sighs when the other man is in the room) and bring it up with him, and he admits that he did feel jealous and apologises, knowing he trusts you implicitly.

THORIN OAKENSHIELD: If Thorin sees another man making advances towards you, you immediately see a change in the Dwarf's demeanour. He becomes quite passive aggressive, giving short answers and appearing a little hostile. But when you get to the bottom of his negative feelings and reassure him with plenty of touch and love-filled words, he apologises to you. He is scared to lose you.

FRANCIS DOLARHYDE: Francis will watch you and the other man, not acting physically on his jealousy. However, he begins mentally plotting ways to harm the man, enjoying the thought of causing pain to him. Francis even admits to you that he had bad thoughts and considered violence, but then begs you to forgive him.

JOHN THORNTON: John Thornton becomes quiet and distant, backing off as soon as he feels in any way threatened by another man sniffing around you. The normally brooding man becomes even more cold toward you, hinting at his jealousy through hints in his words, mentioning the man in conversation. Eventually you sit him down and talk it through with him that nothing will ever happen between you and the other man.

RAYMOND DE MERVILLE: Raymond will not entertain the idea of another man serenading you. In fact, he is quite happy to threaten men and even become violent. Any man who only looks at you for a few seconds too long and they're immediately found on the sharp end of Raymond's sword.

JOHN PORTER: John tries to down play his jealousy and won't talk about it, until you bring it up to him. If he notices you interacting with another man, he will distance himself a little, but you notice him still sneaking glances to see what's going on. Eventually you have to confront John and tell him that he's stupid to think you'd even consider any other man but him as you've fancied him for as long as you've known him.

LUCAS NORTH: Lucas doesn't like to show vulnerability at first, so his jealous behaviour will depend on how long you've been with him and the stage you're at in your relationship. Any initial stage, weeks to a couple of months, and Lucas will try his hardest to not think too much about it. However, the longer you are with him, then the more his jealousy will show. It becomes clipped words, the cold shoulder and icy stares at you and the other man from across a busy room.

***

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Guy of Gisborne tag list: @puggledy-huggledy-is-not-a-pig @whoooooisthis

Thorin Oakenshield tag list: @braidedheart

[esculentevil]

(Thorinduil AU) Dragon Born

Technically a fill for this prompt I found on the hobbit kink meme (it’s probably too short tho): "Legolas is the son of Thranduil and Thorin, however Thranduil didn't know he was pregnant yet when he turned his back on the dwarves when Smaug attacked." I’ve had a similar idea, myself, and decided to do it here even if it’s not a full match (another reason it’s only a technical fill...).

☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ☆💎AO3/Pillowfort🌲☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ☆

During the interrogation in the Elvenking’s throne room, Thorin and Thranduil flirt angrily until they’re right in each other’s faces, glaring heatedly at each other.

However, before things can go any farther (and irrevocably scar Thorin’s co. and Thranduil’s guards), Thranduil rips off his crown just as a very young elfling descends upon his head screaming: “No! MINE Ada! Bad dwarf! Bad dwarf!”

This elfling is Legolas, Thranduil’s son, and he glares adorably angrily at Thorin as the bad dwarf accuses jealously woundedly hatefully his father of... well, Thranduil cuts him off but it’s clear to all but Legolas that it’s infidelity--upon HIM--when the leading dwarf clearly asks: “Was this before or after the dragon?”

To which Duil replies: “DURING the dragon. ... I had found out only hours before and I made to tell you in Erebor--after gathering a small contingency, of course, because I expected Thror to declare war--but... Smaug had made it there first; and the back-up I brought with me was only intended to protect me from Thror long enough for me to return to the forest should it come to that; a dragon... there would have been no standing up to that--especially as it was already IN the mountain--and I had already promised myself that I would not abandon him--would not LEAVE him--as my own father was forced to do with me: I will not die in battle, or anything at all, if it means that my son will be left alone; not for you; not for anybody; and most assuredly not for a DRAGON I WARNED YOU OF.”

[sunnyrosewritesstuff]

The Marali Festival Commentary Part 2

Alright, the next 3 chapters! Honestly, I think it’s fair to say these might be my favorite 3 chapters... 👀 But more on that below!

**SPOILERS FOR THIS FIC BELOW**

Chapter 4- Hug

Dwalin took his place next to Thorin, silently holding the same position as the king.

“I have a plan.” He finally explained.

Dwalin chuckled. “I would hope so. Mahal knows we’ve all been waiting for one of you to do something.”

This was supposed to make people still think that Thorin wrote the note, but I don’t think any of my readers were actually buying it.😂

Thorin had already been placed in the first position and was almost pleading with Mahal for who would be number sixteen. His prayers were answered and he met Heor’s glare with a challenging grin.

Let’s call this chapter the “what-if Thorin got to fight Heor in Guardian of Kings instead”. I don’t think it was nearly as good a battle scene as it was with Bilbo, but I had more time to work with on GOK. 

Thorin immediately took to the center ring as soon as he was summoned. His head held high and his shoulders pulled back. Heor met him stride for stride.

“Been awhile, Thorin.” He smirked.

The disrespect.😒 You know, with this particular OC, he was always supposed to come off as ‘the asshole’ but not necessarily the villain. That definitely didn’t happen in this fic. 

“Heard that before. Although that is a lovely trinket. Did you get that from your hobbit courtesan?”

Thorin’s nostrils flared, and he had Heor shoved three feet away before he even had time to think.

The lesson here: don’t call Bilbo a whore to Thorin’s face.

The blade cut straight up his sternum (would have sliced open his neck) had the chain carrying the acorn button not snagged it. The metal snapped, Thorin hit the dirt, and there was a plethora of guards restraining Heor. Dwalin at the forefront. Thorin lay there as blood ran down his chest in amazement that once again, the hobbit had inadvertently saved his life.

I liked the symbolism here of the ‘acorn’ always saving Thorin and him tying that directly with Bilbo. It was just a nice little parallel.

Something in the hobbit suddenly snapped, and before Thorin knew it, he had Bilbo pressed tightly against him, sobbing into his chest, his arms encircling as much of his body as he could. Thorin felt pained at the memories that still haunted his hobbit, but he returned the hug as best as he could murmuring softly all the way.

“It’s okay. I’m okay. Everything is fine.”

If I remember correctly (this was a year ago after all), I think my initial plan had this hug being a lot more light-hearted, but the moment I brought Heor into it I was like WAIT I CAN MAKE THIS HURT. Did I have a plan to explain how exactly Thorin survived BOTFA? Not exactly.😆 Everyone just got to use their imaginations as I referenced it.

Chapter 5- Harmless Flirting

I feel like I should preface this chapter by saying as someone who is a terrible flirt, I really worried about this prompt...

When asked why the king himself did not choose to show off the merit of his skill, Thorin became surprisingly tight-lipped.

FORESHADOWING! 👀 I either already had @stardryad-random​‘s commission at this point, or she had sent me updates so I was pretty sold on the metallic bouquet at the end.😂

“How about you try and guess. If hobbits had a seven day passion festival, what would we feature?”

Thorin smirked at the challenge. “And what do I get if I win?”

“Whatever you want.” Bilbo breathed almost before his mind could catch up.

Does this count as flirting? Because I’m not so sure it’s harmless at this point.😆

“That’s six.” Bilbo agreed.

They walked in silence for a while. Thorin clearly lost in thought while Bilbo pretended to be impressed by a particularly hefty stone-hewed bookshelf they passed.

Writer Thoughts: What in the hell can be a seventh hobbit ‘passion’? Think, Sunny, think...

“You’re right that dwarves take their crafts to a much more serious level than any hobbit, but if you’ve ever been to a harvest festival…there are contests for nearly everything! Sure the farmers are showing off their prized vegetables and livestock. But oh, there’s so many different contests just for eating! Pie-eating contests, pudding, fudge…and of course lots of games and activities for the faunts. My cousins on my mother’s side that I was particularly close with and I would make the most handsome paper boat. The object being to see it safely down the Brandywine to the finish line, and it would always sink just beforehand. Siggy would get in such a tiff over it. Then there’s beautiful handcrafts that are up for judging too! Hand knitted blankets, prized family recipes, gorgeous wreaths for your door. No, hobbits don’t have crafts persay, but I would think we would have a day just for being passionate…about life, I suppose.”

Good job, Sunny. Self-five. As someone who grew up in a small, rural area, this was 100% based on our county fairs. I won showmanship with my sheep, and my homemade wreaths usually won 3rd place.😏

“Well I suppose I lost our little game, so I feel it only fair to turn the prize to the victor. Ask what you will of me, and I will see it done.”

“Be my escort tomorrow?” Bilbo blurted, catching Thorin off-guard. “I just…today was so lovely. And I thought if you didn’t have anything else…But then you are the king! Of course you would have better plans than to escort…”

Thorin cut him off with a gentle whiskery kiss to his hand.

“It would be my honor.”

So it was actually a little before this chapter that I knew I had messed up. But to be fair, I only had up to Chapter 4 written before I started posting. If you guys actually look at my tumblr post for the first chapter, you will notice the next chapter was supposed to be ‘Dance’. I realized about halfway through this chapter though that I had this idea of Thorin and Bilbo seeing the opera before going to the dance. So he would need an escort for that...

Chapter 6- Be My Escort

So on the original prompt list I borrowed from, it had ‘Movie Night’. I decided to replace that with the Middle Earth equivalent: play/live theater, but named it “Be My Escort”. 

There was a shift in their relationship that has happened recently that Thorin didn’t feel entirely prepared for. Perhaps, he should have been. Perhaps, this was just logically the next step. However, he found himself concerned for Bilbo’s image. The ‘courtesan’ comment made by Heor has sat ill with him, even though the vile vermin was sitting comfortably in a cell right now.

Does anyone else HC Thorin as somebody who has to have a plan and stick to it? Maybe it’s his stubborn nature, but I always imagine Thorin freaking out if anything deviates from the way he saw things working out. This plays into his ‘freak out’ in the next chapter. 

Bilbo had indeed dressed for the occasion. He wore one of his hobbit button-downs and nicer knee length dark slacks, but over that was a dwarven tunic of Durin blue with golden trim and a golden belt around his waist. However, Thorin felt his eyes drift to the hobbits chest where in the gap of the vest, he could see the mithril glittering brightly.

FUNNY STORY! I was complaining to @lordoftherazzles​ that I didn’t know how I wanted Bilbo’s outfit to look, and then sent her down a rabbit hole for a reference pic just for these few sentences of description.😅 Thank you Razzy!! Your efforts were well appreciated.

There was once a point when Thorin was still quite young and naively believing that Erebor would always belong to him, that wanted to forgo any notion of kingship in favor of an operatic career. Before puberty dropped him into a deep bass, his range had been wide and high, and he had been mesmerized by the players on the stage utilizing such gifts for storytelling. Thorin’s grandmother probably would have been the first dwarf in his corner had he ever brought it up. She had always been rather adoring on him and his vocal talents. Alas, life did not turn out the way he wanted nor ever envisioned.

Is this not the cutest headcanon for a young prince Thorin? More on this later this week... 👀

“I didn’t mean to offend.” Bilbo stated quietly.

“You didn’t.”

However, even Thorin recognized the waspish tone in his quick answer.

More evidence of Thorin being needled by things not going his way. It will blow up on him soon. You’ll have to wait til tomorrow though for me to talk about it.😏

[luna-redamancy]

Ok so imagine

Modern reader gets dropped into middle earth BUT it starts off with there two older siblings.

The oldest got turned into a dwarf and is in a relationship with thorin

The middle is an elf who is in a relationship with Thranduil

They all go about there lives and the quest with the siblings joined together again, they talk with the company about the youngest sibling, saying

“Oh there pretty week”

“They don’t do a lot “

“They can’t fight “ etc etc

But during the battle the reader (aka the youngest sibling) comes out of no wear and starts fighting like a badass, what are they? medusa, fucking snake hair and shit but also beating the shit out of orcs with a baseball bat.

Only to stop for a sec to flirt with bilbo because gen z eats potential death for breakfast.

After saying a quick hi to there stunned older siblings, there company (and  Thranduil) the two are asked “who was that?” Also by a bashful bilbo.

“That was are little sister “

-bilbo “ so is she seeing anyone or????”

Hi Nonnie! I hope you enjoy it!:

The entire journey The Company’s heads were filled with lies. Murmurs of your incompetencies laced with venomed words of how you were not only a lazy person but a weak one as well. 

“She didn’t really do much as a child,” Your oldest sibling, (O/S),  told Thorin one night when he asked what had become of the youngest one.

“She took up mother’s time,” Your middle sibling, (M/S) told Thranduil as they rode horseback toward Dale. 

They didn’t care what became of you, not even batting an eye when they awoke in the middle of a fantasy realm with magical powers. (O/S) somehow had powers of vibration, meaning they could feel things through the ground when things approached, the object’s own vibration of movement impacting the natural wavelength of the earth. 

(M/S) obtained powers to control the currents. The movement and temperature of the waters around them. 

“You don’t worry about them?” Bilbo inquired, noting the way (O/S)’s eyes narrowed at Bilbo, but he didn’t flinch as they tried to explain their lack of care for you. 

“Well she was always a problem child, it’s nice to have some relief.” 

If only they knew how honeyed lies were easily uncovered. 

The Battle of The Five Armies was raging, sounds of death and victory yells upon killing an opponent were ringing in the air followed with the stench of bile, excrement, and oncoming decay. 

It was chaos. 

Bilbo did everything he could to avoid the violence, ducking under corners and hiding behind trees with his handy ring. But that didn’t stop this. 

Bilbo gulped in air as he looked at the orc in front of him, blade to his throat. He grasped around in his pocket but it came up empty. He forgot he put the ring in his breast pocket the last time after using it. 

Fighting the urge to not faint where he stood, Bilbo glared at the creature, getting prepared to do whatever he could to survive-

His ‘final thoughts’ moment was paused as a blunt object swung through the air, a sickening thud ringing in his ears as the Orc was hit from the side, going flying off as you landed before him. 

“You’re gonna have to try harder, bub,” You glared, a smirk on your face as you swiveled to look at the hobbit that you saved. 

“A hobbit? Out here?” You questioned, leaning closer. Your eyes were covered by what looked to be reflective glass, your hair looking like moving tendrils as the wind coursed through them–

Wait. 

Bilbo blinked rapidly, moving a hand up to rub his eye as one of the snakes leaned towards him to curiously peer into his eyes.

“S…Snakes,” Bilbo said trembling for a new reason as you continued to lean closer. 

“Y’know… You’re cute,” You hummed, reaching a hand up to brush your thumb over his bottom lip. “I may just have to keep ya,” You blissfully sighed, before remembering what you were in the middle of doing. 

“Try and stay alive, cutie,” If it weren’t for your eyes causing people to be turned into stone, you would’ve winked. 

“Seems like you want some of good ole’ Betsy too,” You rubbed your bat affectionately before locking eyes with another orc. 

“Don’t worry, she makes death quick,” You glared before charging up your swing over your shoulder like you were aiming for a baseball and swung–

Down another orc went. 

Bilbo could hear Thorin’s relieved yells as he spotted Bilbo, the group as well as Thorin’s One’s other sibling approaching. 

“Who…Was that?” Bilbo felt breathless as hot adrenaline poured through his veins. 

“Our sister,” The two siblings replied, disdain in their voices. 

Turning to look at them, Bilbo raised a brow before looking back towards the way you left, a trail of dead orcs showing him clearly where you were headed. 

“Is she being courted?” He asked simply, pursing his lips. 

“Not that I know of-”

“You’re not seriously thinking-”

Rolling up his sleeves, Bilbo got a smirk on his face. “She is now!” He took off jogging in the direction you left, leaving the Company plus Thranduil and your siblings in a state of whiplash and shock. 

“....What just happened?” Ori felt the need to ask, feeling lost as he followed Bilbo’s form until it was out of sight.

“Bilbo is going to have a missus, Ori,” Balin explained, a grin on his face.

“She doesn’t look lazy to me,” Ori voiced his opinion out loud, looking toward your two siblings. 

“Well…-”

“I-”

Their excuses were cut off by the sound of you hollering a loud cheer, riding a troll’s head not too far away from them. 

Forever Tag

@lady-of-lies @all-things-fandomstuck  @fizzyxcustard @izzydaelleth @aquaangel18 @raindancer2004 @love-colorfulglittercollection @ladylouoflothlorien @ten-tenya-iida @legolaslovely @bthtallmadge2 @abesottedlass @wilhelmyna @tigereyesf @aspookybunny @keijibum @moony-artnstuff @sirkekselord @guardianofrivendell @fluffymadamina @izbelross @fandomhoe101 @acahope311 @kitkatd7 @mooseetx @themerriweathermage @elvish-sky @bitter-sweet-farmgirl @laurfilijames @frequentlychangingfandoms @cameronsails @linasofia @starryeyedrogue  @shethereadinghobbit @beenovel @onlystarshere @fckmini @spidergirla5 @i-did-not-mean-to @lathalea @myselfandfantasy @strange-old-worlds @otakumultimuse-hiddlewhore @broken-ghost @mbruben-stein @tschrist1 @hai-kbai

Bilbo- 

@inuhuffclaw

[ichoosechoasandbeingqueer]

Your Good Boy

This is Day 5 of Fili whumptober!

Warnings: past relationship abuse, bruising, kidnapping, flirting

Word count: 2097

You kidnap Fili in an attempt to ransom him back to the royal family for gold. The ransom is quickly forgotten when your prisoner begs you to let him stay.

Please refer to the warnings of this story.  If you go past this point you are consenting to reading this content. 

“Don’t fucking touch me!”

You let the chuckle rumble through your chest as you watched the blond dwarven prince before you. He had tucked himself into the corner of his tiny cell and looked up at you with wide eyes, a storm of emotions flashing amongst the sea of cerulean blue.

“Hush now darling,” you cooed, watching him shiver as you ran your gentle fingertip down his cheek, “this nightmare is almost over. Just a few more days, you can be a good boy just a few more days, can’t you?”

“When Thorin finds you-”

“Oh yes,” you cut him off with a roll of your eyes, “when Thorin finds me I’ll be sorry, I’ll be killed, I’ll regret it. Yes, you’ve told me before,”

“He’ll have you executed for this you know,”

You let out a sigh. If you knew kidnapping and keeping the dwarven prince for ransom would be so boring you might have kidnapped his mother instead. At least she would have fought back by now, screwed up your plans enough for you to fall behind schedule, added a little excitement to this nefarious plot of yours, not just sat in the corner of her and glared at you from afar. If it weren’t for the beads in his hair, you might have feared you captured the wrong dwarf. Three straight days you have had him in your control and not once has he tried to escape. You didn’t even have him tied down to anything. How was this miserable creature the famous ‘lion heart’ Durin prince?

“This might be human of me asking, but I though dwarves were supposed to be more daring than this? I’ve had elves with more fight in them than you,”

That particular comment earnt you a growl, but as he opened his mouth to spit something back at you, he paled and looked to the ground with his lips drawn thin.

“See, you almost had it there kitten,” you cooed again flicking the end of his braid, his face flushing at the action, “don’t you want to bite back? To claw at your chains? To growl and roar in defiance?”

“I- I don’t-”

“Don’t what kitten?”

“I don’t-”

“That’s it honey, tell mommy,”

His blue eyes widened and a look of shame crossed his face, “Fuck off,” he spat again, turning his head away and pulling his legs up to his chest.

You giggled at his reaction, leaning back to let him have some space. Remembering the reason you had wondered over to him in the first place, you gently put down a plate of food at his feet, “Fair enough love, but you have to eat,”

“Right,” he rolled his eyes, a bit of bravery in his form, “like I’m going to do that,”

“Look, I don’t know what other dickheads might want to do to you if they had you in chains, but I don’t want to hurt you. I just want to gab the money and go, but to do that I need you happy and healthy. Well… mainly healthy. You haven’t eaten since you got here so your either going to eat, or I’m going to pin you down somewhere nice and soft and force you to swallow,”

A blush as red as fire spread across his face and down his neck and your own eyes widened at the unintentional inuendo. You decided to ignore it and kept your face straight, pushing the plate towards him again.

“I- I can’t trust you…”  he tried to reason with himself, but the growl of his stomach defied his words.

“What have I done so far to make you not trust me?”

He gave you an unamused look, “you did kidnap me?”

You blinked and reluctantly nodded, “Ok smartass, but other than that. Have I not given you food, water and somewhere to sleep? Have I not been courteous? Have I not been gentle?”

“You have… but how can I know you haven’t just played the part? Looked gentle and sweet while on display but really want to hurt me behind closed doors?”

He looked up at you with a look you couldn’t pick, and something in your stomach twisted. You frowned at the prince and tilted your head slightly as you watched him start to tremble again.

“Easy now kitten, peace. Use your head. The king won’t pay for a body, will he?”

“You don’t have to kill me. You could just make me sick. Make me suffer the same way you have,”

Again a quiver in his voice made you pause. You sat before him in silence for a moment, questioning how you were going to convince the skeptical dwarf.

“Who exactly do you think I am preforming for kitten? The only one here is you. If I really wanted you to suffer, would I not have done so already?”

He stuttered for a moment, stumbling over his words and you gave him an amused look. You nudged the plate again, the tapping of your nail making a tinking sound.

He shot you a glare but grudgingly slid the plate closer to him. He used his fingers to press the rice together and scoop up the thick broth. He was hesitant as he brought it to his lips, his eyes flicking between the food and you before his hunger won him over and he shoveled it into his mouth with a moan. His eyes lit up as he swallowed and he dived back in for more.

“Good boy,” you encouraged, “See? It wasn’t hard, was it? How does it taste?”

“So good,” he muttered as he shoveled it in as fast as he could.

“Bloody rivers, there is a fork Fili,” you chuckled, stopping when he froze and drew back with his head down.

“I- I’m sorry, please- please don’t take it away,”

“Take it-,” you frowned, that twisting in your stomach coming back, “I’m trying to get you to eat, why would I take it?”

The prince stayed silent as he curled in on himself even more, flinching back when you moved to take a handkerchief from your pocket. His fear was apparent and you moved slowly and softly as you hushed and soothed him. You held out the piece of material to prove you had nothing to hurt him, and you took up his hand in yours.

His hands were bigger than yours, his fingers thick and rough, carrying scars and burns you could only assume came with crafting in his forge. You had not seen many dwarves in your life, but you thought the other races rather mad for not finding their beauty. Their skill and passion of crafting alone made you weak, and if Fili’s passion was the same as the love and care he showed for the many knives you had confiscated from his body before you brought him here, you could admire each and every mark upon his flesh.

He watched you carefully as you traced his fingers, wiping away the mess from his skin with the cloth.

“Eat Fili,” you mumbled to the prince, “I will not take your food from you. I was not mad that you used your hands, I merely though it would be easier for you,”

He hummed in acknowledgment and let his attention linger on you for a little longer before returning to the plate of food, this time using the fork to scoop up the food. He was so hungry he didn’t seem to mind you still fiddling with his left hand despite it being his dominant, to busy balancing his food from the plate to his mouth, and didn’t notice you pull his sleeve up his arm to keep it out of the way.

He certainly did notice the sharp inhale you took when you noticed the bruises on his forearm however.

He made a move to tug his arm away but you tightened your grip and kept his in place, your eyes not leaving his marks. One or two bruises you could excuse as an accident. How many walls have you walked into this week alone? But this… this made you feel sick. You could count twelve marks on this arm alone, most turning a dull yellow and fading, others fresh and still a deep purple and none of them small. In fact, the largest was bigger than your whole hand.

Fili whimpered again, trying to pull away from your grasp but you wouldn’t move. You were no doubt scaring him but you felt frozen in your place.

“Are there more?” you whispered quietly, letting your other hand roam careful over each and every mark, testing those that still hurt, and where you could brush without bringing him pain. When he didn’t reply you looked him in the eye and asked again.

“I- please. No there’s not,”

“Fili Durin do not lie to me,” you growled, you voice making him shake, “Are there more?”

He opened his mouth to speak but ended up nodding yes instead.

“Show me,”

It was not a question and he knew that. As best he could with one hand he undid the top two of his buttons, already showing off another mark on his collarbone, before pulling the tunic off. You moved to get a better look at him. The pale skin of his back and torso were stained with marks of purple and green, the golden curls on his chest doing nothing to hide them. Some were straight like he had been hit with a pole, some curved and thin like they had been made with a strap. Tears welled in his beautiful blue eyes and you gently pulled him close. He didn’t fight you this time, his fingers wrapping onto the collar of your shirt and his face tucked into the crook of your neck. You could hear the sobs he was trying to hold in.

Your heart hammered in your chest as you held him, threading you fingers through his hair and rubbing soothing circles on his back where the marks could not be seen.

“Who?” you demanded in a low voice, “Who did this to you?”

“I couldn’t stop her… she was always so perfect… no one would believe me if I tried to tell,” he muttered miserably into your throat, his lips tickling the soft skin there. Your very soul felt like it had been ripped apart when you heard him mutter, “Please don’t make me go back. I won’t argue. I’ll eat. Just… please,”

“Who Fili?”

“My wife,”

You took a deep breath to steady yourself. It was no secret that he had been forced to marry a darrowdam from the Iron Hills, everyone knew it was an arranged marriage, even the humans that lived in Dale knew, but since their wedding day the couple had been nothing but infatuated with each other. Or so the rumors had said.

You couldn’t imagine the pain and terror he must have been put through to be in this position, to beg his captor to keep him there. Is that why he hadn’t fought back? Is that why he tucked himself away and flinched at your every movement?

A fire built up in your chest as you looked down at the tired dwarf in your arms.

“Change of plans,” you hummed as you slid off your cloak and wrapped it around his bruised body, “No more hostage situation,”

He looked up at you with pleading eyes, “No please. You must keep me! Please, I-I’ll be good, your good boy. That’s what you want right? Please, don’t take me back. Not yet,”

“Hush now kitten,” you soothed nudging him to stand. Like an eager puppy desperate to prove himself, he obeyed, and you moved him to the soft bed you had made for him in his cell. You pulled away the furs as he sat and you tucked him in its warmth as you handed him the plate of food he still had left, “I’m not taking you back. The money can wait. This can’t,”

“I-”

“No one,” you growled, taking his chin in your hands to face you, “is ever going to touch you like this again, do you hear me? No one, touches what is mine,”

“What are you going to do?” he asked nervously, fiddling with one of his braids. You took the strand from his fingers and ran a calming hand through his hair again.

“First I’m going to patch you up,” you purred, stroking his face as he leaned into you, “Then I’m going to kill your wife,”

✨✨✨✨

See full 31 day whumptober 2022 Master List here

[ethereal-inquisitor]

Chapter 11: I'm Not as Think as You Drunk I Am

a/n: Drinking, drinking games, clumsy flirting, jealous!Thorin, talk of bonds, this is still such a slow burn I'm sorry

Previous Chapter

Before you went to the pub, Dwalin and Balin showed you to your room. Everything had been relocated, so you were glad that the two brothers were showing you where to go because you would have never found it on your own. You looked around the beautiful hallway, mouth agape. The hall your room was in was extravagant. Amethyst and other gemstones dotted the walls like glitter, and you were fascinated by the tapestries and various carvings. Balin chuckled, insisting that you would have time to stare later.

There were five rooms on this hall, two one each side and one in the very back.

“So who lives where?” you asked curiously, shifting your bag on your shoulder to keep it from falling.

Balin hesitated. “Well, this is your room,” he said, motioning to the farthest door on the right. “Kili is across from you, Fili is this first one here, the one across from Fili is Dwalin, and…” Balin mumbled something quickly that you didn’t catch.

“What?”

“And Thorin is the one at the end of the hall.”

You froze, giving the two of them a wide-eyes stare. “You mean my room is right next to Thorin’s?”

Dwalin grunted. “’S the only place appropriate, lass. You are his One.”

Balin elbowed Dwalin, glaring at his brother before he turned back to you. “Unfortunately, while I know you’d rather be in any room than here, we have nothing else. Your room was picked back before the two of you….separated, and everything we have repaired now is for families coming in from Erid Luin.”

Several emotions bubbled up to the surface before you managed to push them back down. It was just a room, and you would not be here long enough for it to really make a difference. “Thank you both for escorting me here,” you said finally, moving to open the door to your room. “And Dwalin, I’m not his One.”

Dwalin opened his mouth to retort, but Balin, once again, elbowed him in the gut to keep him from saying anything. “Rest up, dear. Bofur will be by later, apparently. He will help you get to where you need to go. If you get lost, there are guards who can point you in the right direction.” With that, Balin dragged his brother down the hall again, whispering angrily to him every step of the way.

You opened the door to your room, eyes widening at the scene.

Your bedding was a deep midnight blue, with sparkling threads woven through the fabric to mimic stars. The bed itself was a huge, four-poster canopy with sheer curtains that hung gently around the bed like mist. The posts themselves were gorgeous carvings of unicorns and dragons. There was a wardrobe, a vanity, an entire sitting area in the back corner complete with a small library, and it was all beautifully crafted furniture. The kicker, though, was the ceiling. It was painted to look like the night sky complete with whisps of clouds, and there were small glowing gemstones set in the constellation patterns of Middle Earth. You weren’t sure how they were glowing or what they were, but it was breathtaking.

Everything in this room was a conversation you and Thorin had. From the carvings of magical creatures on the various furniture to the night sky itself, he had remembered almost everything you’d ever spoken about and created a room full of beautiful and thoughtful memories.

The sharp ache in your chest almost brought you to your knees at the pain of it, and you blamed the sudden tears filling your eyes on that pain. The love this room was crafted with was obvious, and you were completely unprepared for your reaction to it.

You were going to have to be very drunk to stay in this room without wanting to rip out your own heart.

Speaking of drinking, it was at that very moment that you heard a soft knock at your door. You opened the door to see Bofur and Gloin looking very suspicious. They looked at you, and Bofur tsked. “Now, lass, that’s no’ the right clothes to go drinkin’ in. You don’t have something a little more….festive?”

You rolled your eyes, sliding your outer clothing off your shoulders to reveal the pretty, low-cut blouse underneath, courtesy of Thranduil. The brown leather pants you were wearing looked good with the soft green top, and you quickly ran a brush through your hair. You left it down, unadorned and unbraided. You didn’t have the patience to do anything with it other than making sure it wasn’t tangled.

When you went back to the door where the two of them were standing, Bofur whistled. “That’s a drinkin’ outfit. Come on, lass, let’s go!” The two dwarves practically drag you out of your room, obviously excited at the prospect of drinking themselves silly. You follow them because you have no other choice, wondering how many drinks you could get down before getting stupid drunk. Your last count was five, but maybe you could beat that today.

They led you through an area of the city you had never been in before, bright a bustling with life. The sign above the door they went in said ‘Sparrow and Sock’, and you wondered what kind of story came with a tavern name like that.

Inside the tavern was noisy, and the familiar smell of alcohol permeated the air. Rowdy dwarves were flirting with the dwarrowdams, and there were even a few humans among the bunch. Bofur led you to a small table, motioning for you to stay there while he got drinks. Gloin had disappeared to gods know where, and you stood a little awkwardly at your table, shifting your weight from one foot to the other.

Bofur came back with three tankards of ale, looking pleased with himself as he sat one in front of you. “We will start this evening with something easy.” He sat one next to him, then settled at the table with his. “Now, lass, I’d love to hear about how you’ve been for the past year.”

From anyone else, you would have rolled your eyes and not said anything, suspicious of their intent. But not Bofur. Bofur was genuinely interested in how you had been, so you took a long swing of ale before replying. “I’ve been fine. Not much to do in the Shire, but it’s been peaceful. A lot different from where I come from.” Another swig. “I used to long for a life like I have in the Shire. I hated travelling and trekking down into tombs, healing obnoxious heroes, et cetera. But after adventuring with you all, the Shire is too quiet.”

Bofur listened quietly, looking past you for a moment and motioning to the table. Gloin must have made it back. Indeed, the red-haired dwarf made it to the table, but it seemed as if he had found a friend. Dragged along behind him was a tall, blonde human male. His hair was pulled back from his face, and his eyes were the greenest you had ever seen. He was sporting a day or two’s worth of facial growth, giving him a more rugged look. He was obviously some kind of fighter from the looks of his broad shoulders and calloused hands. Towering over the table, the newcomer nodded to you and Bofur, and Gloin smacked him on the back with a laugh.

“Don’t worry, lad, we don’t bite! Bofur, lass, this is Eric. Eric is visitin’ our fair city from Dale. What was it you said you were doing here, lad?” Gloin asked, motioning for another ale to the barkeep. He sat and told Eric to do the same.

“Oh, I’m captain of the guard in Dale. King Thorin and King Bard agreed to let some of our men come and train with the dwarven warriors.” Eric thanked the dwarrow who brought his ale over, taking a long gulp.

“Aye, he’s an impressive warrior,” Gloin said, elbowing you gently in the side. “Definitely in proper shape.”

You blinked at the dwarf, a dawning horror washing over you as you realized why Eric was brought over to the table. They were trying to play matchmaker.

“It-it’s a pleasure to meet you, Eric,” you said, glaring at Bofur—who looked very pleased with himself—and Gloin – who looked just as pleased. You were going to kill them. You down the rest of your cup in a couple of swallows, listening to the boys chatter with Eric for a few minutes. You were so lost in your own thoughts, you almost missed when the conversation came back your way.

Bofur called your name, and you snapped back to attention. “Sorry, what was that?” you asked, motioning for another ale.

“Eric asked what you do, lass,” the dwarf repeated.

“Oh! Well, I’m a healer. I do various other things, as well, but healing is my main job.”

“That’s fascinating! Do you focus more on herbs and tonics or surgery?” Eric seemed genuinely interested, which was a surprise, but the drink was kicking in and you felt a little more friendly as the warmth began to make your fingertips tingle.

“Neither. I’m more of a…magical bandaid.” You wiggled your fingers in front of you, and a small spark of gold jumped between them. “Though I do enjoy making potions. It’s just a lot less effective than what I’m used to working with.”

He followed the way the magic jumped in your hand; green eyes wide. “I didn’t know magic could be used in such a manner. I thought it was just fireballs and turning people into toads.”

You giggled at him, pulling your hand back. “I wish I could turn people into toads,” you grumble, looking pointedly at the two dwarves.

“I was just telling Eric, here, that you’re helping with the illness. None of the humans have fallen ill, but they do have the occasional accident with training. I bet the lass here would be able to fix them up!” Gloin took a long swig of his ale, chuckling. “Mahal knows she fixed us up more than once.”

Eric looked at you, hopeful. “Is that a possibility? Gods know it would be such a relief knowing that if a soldier is hurt during training that he won’t be out for months.”

You sighed, completely unable to tell anyone no, let alone an adorable Captain giving you that cute look. Oh, the ale was kicking in.

“I don’t plan on being around for more than a week or so, but if something happens in that time…” You make a happy noise when a new cup of ale was sat in front of you, “then I’ll help as much as I’m able.”

The smile the human gave you made your stomach flip, and you took another long gulp, hoping the ale would help you ignore that feeling. He seemed like a very nice and attractive person, and in any other situation, you may have flirted a bit more. However, with your confidence completely shot and the dwarves watching the exchange like they bet money on something, you didn’t trust anything that was happening now. You sighed heavily, finishing your third –maybe?—cup of ale. “If you gentleman would excuse me, I think I’m done drinking for the evening.”

Bofur’s eyes went wide as you stood. “Noooo! You can’t leave yet, Lass, the night is still young!” He grabbed your hand, giving you a pleading look. “Just a little while longer?”

“What are you planning, Bofur?” you asked, slowly sinking back into your seat.

The dwarf beamed at you. “Nothing, lass. But the thought of you sitting in that room alone makes me sad. You deserve to be with friends, even ones who drink like Gloin.” He motioned to the other dwarf who was currently trying to down two cups of ale at once, failing miserably. Eric seemed highly entertained, scooting a little closer to you so that Gloin didn’t splash him.

You snorted in amusement. “Not too much longer. We still have to save the world, you know.”

Bofur nodded. “Oh, I know. But that doesn’t mean you have to give up the good stuff. That’s the stuff that reminds you what you’re fighting for.” He winked at you, taking a sip of his drink. “Now that we have four people, I’d say its time for a drinking game!”

“Oh, no, Bofur, you know what happened last time. I’ll watch.”

“Nonsense!” Gloin bellowed, standing from his seat. “This one is going to be fun!”

You reluctantly agreed to play after a serious amount of begging from not only the dwarves but Eric as well. The game was far too complicated to follow, so you did your best and followed along, drinking when they told you to. By the end, you were pretty sure they were making up rules, and you were buzzing all over from the alcohol. You tapped out, knowing if you drank any more that you would quickly tumble into the ugly, sad drunk. Right now, pleasantly numb, you put your head on Eric’s shoulder as both Bofur and Gloin argued about who was the winner.

“You know, I think Bofur won,” you said to the blonde, looking up at him. “He did manage to drink the last cup Gloin handed him.

“Ah, but Gloin then drank two cups to Bofur’s one, thereby making him the winner,” Eric argued, grinning down at you. From this close, you could see the smattering of freckles dotted across his nose, and they reminded you of constellations. Cute little stars like the ones on your ceiling. You frowned at that thought, your eyes meeting Eric’s for a moment before someone cleared their throat behind you.

Bofur yelped, giving a nervous little chuckle as you nearly tip over at how quick Eric gets to his feet. “Oh, h-hello, your maj-majeshtyyy,” Bofur drawled, elbowing Gloin.

You right yourself, trying to keep the room from spinning as you turned to look at the new guest.

Thorin ignored all of them, focused entirely on you. He was furious, and for the life of you, you couldn’t figure out why. Yes, you were a little—a lot—alottle drunk, but you were still fully dressed and weren’t dancing on any tables. It was a far better situation than last time. His blue eyes practically burned, and he spared a glance to Eric, who was currently dropped down on one knee in greeting to the Dwarven King. “Leave,” Thorin said, tone leaving no room for argument.

Eric quickly left, sparing a final glance back to you with a little wave. You waved back, smiling at the captain before turning back to Thorin.

He was still angry.

However, he did look delicious.

Some of the fury left his face, and his lips quirked up in a smirk. “Why, thank you, my lady. I do endeavor to be pleasing to your eye.

 Your eyes widen. “I said that out loud?!” you screeched in horror. Your entire face was immediately beet red, and you buried your face in your hands. Gods, kill you now.

You didn’t watch as he turned to Bofur and Gloin, but you heard him ramble off something in dwarvish.

“We’re just helping the lass relax, yer Majesty, she’s very tense. Doesn’t help with the healing and such,” Bofur said, as if an expert on healers and their magics.

Thorin growled, moving closer to you. Something crashed behind you, and you lifted your head from your hands to see a brawl breaking out. Three dwarves crashed into each other, cursing in their native tongue as they beat each other silly. “You call this a relaxing atmosphere?” the king asked, reaching down to pull you into a standing position. “It’s not safe.”

You swayed on your feet, grasping his forearms to steady yourself. “I’m perfectly safe. I’ve had two strapping dwarves and a Captain of the Guard protecting me. And keeping me warm. ‘s chilly.” You pulled away from his touch, grabbing the table as the world refused to stop spinning. Maybe a little less alcohol next time?

A chair flew right at your face, and you were suddenly pulled into Thorin’s arms, listening to him bellow something threatening out in dwarvish. The ones fighting stopped immediately, realizing it was their king that almost got his by a chair. They paled, spouting off how sorry they were as they ran out of the tavern.

You wriggled until he let you go, smoothing your shirt. “I guess that’s my cue to leave,” you mumbled, rubbing your eyes.

Bofur chuckled, looking pointedly at Gloin. “Yes, lass, it’s time for you to leave. Perhaps Thorin will escort you to your room?”

You paused, your foggy brain trying to tell you something, but you couldn’t quite rationalize anything in this state. “Mmm, no. Kings have lots of business to attend to. I’ll find my way on my own, thank you.”

Thorin chuckled and crossed his arms. “Do you even know where you’re staying?”

“Mmhmm.”

“And where would that be?” he asked, tilting his head as his eyes twinkled in amusement. Apparently, he thought you were funny. You weren’t funny, and he was infuriating.

“Mmm, Eric’s room?” you said sweetly, hearing the gasps and choked laughter from Gloin and Bofur.

Thorin was not amused. He narrowed his eyes, lips pursing in annoyance. “No,” he said grumpily. “I’ll take you to your room. Come.”

You were completely unable to stop the next sentence from leaving your lips.

“I was trying before you interrupted me and Eric.”

Howls of laughter escaped Gloin and Bofur, and when you looked at them you realized they were literally rolling on the floor.

There was a wall right behind you, and you suddenly found yourself pressed against it. You were only an inch or so taller than Thorin on a good day, so you were eye to eye with the king as he brought his hand up and tangled it in your hair. Tugging your head back gently, he brought his lips to yours, close enough that they were almost touching, then swiftly slid his head to the side to press them against your ear.

“You are playing with fire, Amrâlimê,” he growled against the shell of your ear, and you sucked in a breath to stop the whimper that had almost escaped your lips. “If it is relief you seek, I would be honored to offer my services. I assure you they are much more….developed than that of a human man.” The fist in your hair tightened, and the prickling sensation of his beard on the sensitive skin right below your ear made you shiver, and your traitorous body started to relax under him.

“I wouldn’t know,” you sulked, sliding your hands up his chest and grabbing his shoulders. “I’m too ugly.”

He pulled away, nipping gently at that sensitive skin under your ear as he released you. “You are far too inebriated,” he said finally after studying your face for a few moments. “You need sleep and water, and then we will continue this conversation.” His tone brooked no argument, and he slid his hand down your arm to gently wrap around your wrist. “I will take you back to your room.”

You waved weakly at Bofur and an unconscious Gloin. You had no choice but to follow Thorin, trying to tug your arm away from him. His grip is like steel, and he shoots you a look that both frightens and excites you. Alcohol was such a bad idea. You were never drinking it again. Nothing could possibly be more embarrassing than this moment.

A dwarf skidded to a halt right in front of Thorin, holding a small box in his hand and breathing heavily as he tried to calm himself. “Your majesty,” he huffed, holding up the box. “I apologize for interrupting, but my mother asked me to deliver this to the Healer. She ordered it a year ago, and it is finally finished.”

Oh. No. Please, to any god or spirit listening, please let this not be happening now.

Thorin looked back at you with a puzzled expression, taking the box from the dwarf. He studied it, turning it over, and then looked at you for an explanation.

The delivery dwarf took that moment to escape, walking back down the hallway without a care in the world.

You reach out for the box, palm up. “I’ll…. I’ll take that, thank you.”

Thorin didn’t budge. “What is it?”

You shook your head, wrapping your arms around yourself and taking a deep breath. “Nothing to concern yourself over. It was the only thing I ever ordered here in Erebor, and I no longer have need of it. If you give it to me, I’ll get rid of it.”

He grunted, not convinced, and moved to pull the bow from around the box.

“Don’t!” You lunge forward and snatch the box from him, holding it close to your chest. “It’s stupid. There’s nothing to see. I’m just going it burn it…if I can…”

Your name falls from his lips in a growl, and you clutch the box tighter. “What. Is. It?”

You couldn’t tell him. You would die of embarrassment, especially standing right here in the hall. A year ago, he had announced your courtship to his people, and things had started getting very heated between the two of you. You wanted to wear something special for your first time with him, something to entice him, so you commissioned what was in the box.

It was lingerie, but with a dwarven twist. The tailor in question was a lovely dwarrowdam who nearly burst with pride when you came to her with this task. She was probably the only genuine friend you made in Erebor aside from the company, and the two of you sat together and designed the perfect combination between the designs from your world and the dwarven equivalent. It had lace, gemstones, and delicate chains of gold holding it together, and you were sure that if you ever managed to wear it, you would look amazing. It was the only thing you ever spent any real money on while you were here.

You had completely forgotten about it until you saw the box.

 You glared at him, swaying on your feet. “Nothing!” You rub a hand over your face to try and keep the world from spinning again. “At least, nothing you’ll ever have to worry about seeing. I’m sure I can find someone to show it to. Eric, maybe.”

You couldn’t help baiting him. The alcohol had taken most of your censoring ability and thrown it in the trash.

His expression morphed into one of extreme interest, focusing on the box pressed against your chest and ignoring your barb. “So it is something for more intimate times?”

You breezed past him, walking in the direction he had started walking in. You needed to get to bed before the nice buzz you had was ruined. You were also slightly irritated he didn’t take the bait. “Mmmhmm,” was all you said, not stopping.

He walked easily beside you, that infuriating look still on his face. If you didn’t know better, you would say it was hunger. Since you did know better, you ignored him.

“Perhaps,” he said conversationally, “you would let me see it. For educational purposes?”

You spin on your heel, rage bubbling up as your heart clenched. Educational? For who? His next queen? “I will not show you something that I had made for us to share just so you can use it for your next girlfriend,” you hissed, glaring at him.

He blinked, surprised at the venom in your voice. “I did not mean…” He sighed, gently leading you through the hallways. “I did not mean to insinuate that I was looking for another. I merely wanted to see this special item.”

You scoffed, staring at the floor as you followed him. “I imagine it wouldn’t be to your taste. It’s something to wear.”

You felt a hand grasp your upper arm, and you’re spun around to face Thorin for the second time tonight. You make a noise, trying not to vomit at the sudden movement.

“When you are not plied with drink, we will have another conversation about this. It is obvious that I have not made it clear, so I will reiterate for you now. You are the only woman I will ever have interest in. I am trying to give you space, but it is difficult. Every fiber of my being is demanding that I prove to you how precious you are to me.” He drew you into his arms in a firm hug, and for a beautiful second he put all the broken pieces of your heart back together with the warmth of his embrace. Something in your chest shifted, and a small fragment of your bond reached out to him. It was a tiny, fragile offering you weren’t even aware of making, but it brought you more peace than you had felt in over a year.

You didn’t know what to say to him, so you let the whisp of a bond say it for you. He held your gaze, eyes wide as he realized what had happened. As you stood there in the middle of the hallway, staring at each other, you wondered why you were fighting it so hard.  Even with your fuzzy brain, you wanted to be with him more than anything else. You leaned in just a little as the magic of the moment completely fogged your brain, and he cupped your face again as if trying to memorize everything about it.

Running his thumb along your bottom lip, he tugged you closer.

“Uncle! You’re needed in the throne roo—OH!” Kili skidded around the corner, realizing what was happening.

And the moment was shattered.

You jumped away from him as if you were burned, tightening your grip on the box. “I… I need to go. Goodnight.” You barely acknowledged Kili, hurrying into your room and slamming the door shut. Pressing your back against the door, you slid down until you sat on the floor.

You were far too drunk for this, but you knew that couldn’t happen again. Drinking was off the menu. Forever. Damn Bofur.

Tilting to the side, you clutched at the box like a teddy bear, pressing your face into the cool stone of the floor. Sleeping would help clear your head, and you would be a lot more careful from now on. With a groan, you stood, pulling off all your clothes and rummaging through your things to find a giant tunic. Throwing it on, you crawl over the beautiful comforter, still clutching the box.

Even though your brain was heavily protesting, a small part of you was content. The whisper of the bond had given you a little relief from the ache it always caused, and Thorin was the last thing you pictured before you fell asleep.

Next Chapter

[gamgeesgarden]

Thorin: I don’t know how to flirt, I’m just going to stand here, glaring at you until you marry me

Bilbo: okay?

[beenovel]

A Frankly Hilarious Misunderstanding

Pairing: Kili x gn!reader

Word count: 2,103 (.... I have nothing to say for myself)

Warnings: none, misunderstandings for the purposes of comedy, not angst

Summary: Some minor human/dwarf cultural differences lead to major confusion. (AKA Kili is a himbo that doesn’t understand human customs)

A/n: This was a random shower thought that made me laugh until I slipped and @claraofthepen encouraged me to write.

Thank you to @claraofthepen @elvish-sky and @messiambrandybuck for beta reading!! Y'all are the best <3

Brief background: Y/n and your brother (Will) are humans that Gandalf brought along on the quest. Don’t ask me why, the spooky old wizard is mysterious. In your culture, it’s traditional for the courter to ask a courtee’s older relative if they can court. This will be important later. Also, homophobia isn’t a thing because I said so.

-

You lowered yourself onto a log by the fire with a grateful sigh. After a long day of walking, the thought of a hot dinner and sleep (even on the hard ground) was a relief. Thorin had called for everyone to stop right as the sun neared the horizon. This meant you’d had enough light to set up for the night much faster than normal.

Kili sat down next to you. He smiled and despite your exhaustion, you returned the gesture on instinct.

“Here,” he said while handing you a bowl of soup. You knocked your shoulder against his in thanks.

You, Will, Fili, and Kili had become all but inseparable over the past few months of the journey. Being so close in (relative) age, you all got along very well. You and Kili had grown especially close. He flirted with you non-stop and you had quickly fallen in love with him.

The only problem was that while Kili flirted with you quite a bit, he also flirted with everyone. Including your brother, though only occasionally. You were waiting to be sure he actually wanted to be with you, but if he made you wait any longer you were going to ask him despite your doubts. Patience is a virtue, but virtues are overrated anyway.

You looked across the fire to see your brother all but sitting on Ori. Dori did not look particularly happy about this. Your brother, on the other hand, was giggling like a ditzy maid at something Ori had said. You could see how happy Ori was at having made Will laugh, as he was looking at him with a small affectionate smile.

You wanted to walk over and smack their heads together for being so obtuse. Everyone could see how much they cared for one another but they were both too nervous to do anything about it. You had seen your brother face down a lone warg with nothing but a handful of dirt and a stick. And now he quailed at the thought of admitting his feelings for the quiet scribe. Ori seemed convinced that someone as brave as your brother could never love someone as quiet and shy as him.

You shook your head lightly in exasperation. Will had forced you to listen as he lamented his 'unrequited love' countless times. Despite your many, many (many) attempts to convince him otherwise (and all evidence to the contrary) your brother resolutely believed that Ori could never love him the same.

You thought back to the other night when you’d both been on watch.

“I’m just some human,” Will had said as he looked over at Ori’s sleeping form like a kicked puppy. “How could he ever feel the same?”

You had rolled your eyes then and you rolled them again now. Will often told you that one of these days you were going to roll your eyes so far back into your head they’d get stuck. He hadn’t particularly enjoyed it when you strongly insinuated that it would be his fault.

You were so distracted by your brother and Ori, you didn’t notice the nervous breakdown Kili was having right next to you. He was staring into the fire with some intensity while silently moving his lips to the thoughts in his head. His hand was deep in his pocket, worrying a courting bead.

Fili (who no one was paying attention to unlike you, Kili, Will, and Ori, who had the entire company's attention split between the four of you, with varying amounts of exasperation) was watching Kili with much the same expression you were watching Will with. After a moment he leaned over to his brother and whispered in his ear so that only he could hear.

“Go ask, you know what the reply will be. I’m growing sick of watching you two dance around each other and if you don’t ask soon, I'll ask for you.”

Kili turned to Fili with wide, concerned eyes.

“You wouldn’t.”

“Want to bet?”

Kili really didn’t.

Kili turned to you and gently placed his hand on your arm, pulling you out of your (by this point slightly murderous) thoughts.

“Take a walk with me?”

You smiled brightly at Kili.

“Alright”

Kili leads you to a stream the company had stopped near earlier in the day. He was silent the whole way and while silence between the two of you was usually comfortable, you couldn’t help but notice how nervous he seemed.

“Everything all right?”

He smiled.

“Of course Y/n!”

He still seemed nervous but you figured he would tell you when he was ready. You soon came to the small stream and sat down on a fallen log beside it.

Kili took a deep breath and turned to you.

“Y/N, for months I have been quite taken with you.”

The boldness of Kili’s words and how suddenly he said them took you by surprise. Kili, upon seeing your expression, hastily tried to amend his words.

“What I meant to say, erm, is that I’ve fallen in lo-” Kili coughed “I mean, I would like— Mahal Damn it give me a moment.”

Much to your giddy amusement, the young prince stopped his ramblings and took a breath, gathering himself before he spoke again. His voice was level, though his hands still fidgeted and his eyes were downcast.

“(Y/N), your mind and your beauty have enraptured me. I’ve never met your equal in wit and kindness, not in all the years I’ve been on Middle Earth. I ask for your hand in courtship, if it would please you, for it would surely please me.”

The prince glanced up at you and saw the tears in your eyes. His own widened and he began to pull away as he backtracked.

“However, if you were to refuse me, I would understand… I shouldn’t have assumed you felt the same… I mean, I’m so sorry-“ you interrupted the prince's ramblings by throwing your arms around his neck.

“Kili I would love to court you!”

Kili pulled back just enough to smile at you.

“So you’ll let me braid your hair?”

“Of course! Isn’t that pretty much the same thing as asking me to court you?”

Kili nodded.

“Then I’ve already said yes, you silly dwarf! …. Though my brother might be a bit upset.”

Kili frowned and remained silent for a moment before he asked

“Why? I thought he liked me.”

“No, no he does! It’s just, well, you were supposed to ask him first.”

Kili looked at you for a moment in obvious confusion.

“Kili? Are you alright?”

That seemed to break Kili out of his thoughts and he gained a look of determination. He quickly got up and began striding back towards camp.

You sat on the log for a moment looking after him in disbelief before getting up and jogging after him. You caught up to him and moved in front of him to block his path.

“Kili, Kili stop. Where are you going?” You asked him breathlessly.

“I’m going to ask your brother,” Kili said, clearly confused.

“We can do that later, my love.”

Kili took your hands in his and looked up at you.

“If it’s an important human tradition then I would honor it. Your culture and customs are just as important as my own.”

You wanted to argue further, but he was being so sweet and thoughtful you only sighed. You could also tell this was something he was going to be stubborn about.

“Alright.”

You hadn’t even finished speaking before he resumed dragging you back to camp.

You got back to camp and Fili turned to you with a big smile, which was quickly replaced with a frown at his brother’s intense expression.

Kili quickly walked up to Will and got down on one knee in front of him. Will looked over Kili’s shoulder at you and you shrugged. He turned back to Kili when he started speaking.

“Will, would you do me the honor of courting me?”

Will blinked and your jaw dropped. Silence fell over the camp. Everyone looked either at Kili or each other in bewilderment.

Ori stood up beside Will and glared at Kili so intensely that he’d have died on the spot if looks could kill.

“You knew I was going to ask him to court me! How could you?!”

Your brother (who had been looking at Kili like he’d grown a second head) turned to Ori quickly.

“Wait what?”

“Don’t ask me, it’s some sort of human custom!” Kili said.

You, Will, and Ori all began talking at once.

“Why would you - talking about - FIGHT YOU FOR HIM”

Will turned to Ori with an “Again, what?!”

Kili turned back to you with a fearful and very confused face.

“You said I had to ask him first.”

You blinked at him for a moment then burst out laughing so loudly Oin fell off his log.

The rest of the company stared at you in shocked silence for a moment before Will asked you (or maybe just the world at large) a question.

“What’s going on?”

Unfortunately, you were laughing too hard to reply and poor Kili didn’t understand any better than the rest of them.

Dwalin looked at Ori (who had turned a brilliant shade of red) and then moved to stand between Ori and Kili.

“Kili I think you’d better explain what happened when you and y/n were in the woods before Ori bursts a blood vessel,” He said

By now your face was starting to hurt. Kili looked at you in worry before he began.

“When I proposed Y/n said,” Kili paused here and turned his eyes to the sky as he tried to remember the exact wording “Of course, but you have to ask my brother first.”

Will started laughing too, and by this time you were lying on the ground near passing out from lack of oxygen.

Bilbo came to Kili’s rescue as most of the company was doubled over laughing now, having realized what you meant.

“I think what y/n meant was that you have to ask Will for permission to court. Not that you have to ask him to court you.”

You vaguely nodded as you continued to wheeze on the ground.

Eventually, you stopped laughing long enough to get off of the ground and you wiped your eyes. Kili gave you a slightly betrayed look as Fili used your shoulder for support to keep himself from falling over.

Will had managed to pull himself together long before you, so he was only chuckling when he said “Kili, I give you full permission to court y/n.”

He got far more serious as he turned to Ori who was now calm and growing shyer by the second.

“And I would love to court you, Ori.”

Ori smiled and nodded and they went off to the edge of camp to braid each other’s hair.

You noticed Nori was having to nearly physically restrain Dori from storming over to them.

You turned to a bright red Kili. “Aren’t you supposed to be braiding my hair?”

Kili took your hand and slowly began leading you to the edge of camp.

He sat behind you and while you expected to feel his hands in your hair, you didn’t.

“Kili?” You asked.

When he took a moment to respond you turned around to look at him. He was looking at your hair with a strange mixture of longing and sadness.

You sighed.

“Kili, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to laugh, I-“

“Are you sure you want to court me?” He cut you off “I would understand if you didn’t, I mean I pretty much ruined the whole thing.”

“Kili” you whispered as you put your hand on his cheek.

“There is no one I’d rather be with,” you said.

“And besides, just think what a wonderful story this will make,” you said with a smile “plus if you hadn’t, Will and Ori might not have ever gotten together.”

He barked out a laugh.

“Those are very good points, ghivashel.”

“I know, I’m the one who made them.”

Kili pulled you in for a soft kiss. It quickly got more heated and your whole body was screaming for you to climb into his lap. Sudden whooping (from the company members) and exaggerated gagging (from Will and Fili) reminded you that you had an audience.

You lightly slapped Kili’s knee and said “get to braiding” as you turned back around.

He did and you reveled in the feeling of his fingers twisting in your hair.

“Now, tell me what ‘ghivashel’ means.”

-

-

Tag list: @elvish-sky @kumqu4t @anjhope1 @thewhiteladyofrohan @claraofthepen @dat-pan-dwarf @messiambrandybuck @shethereadinghobbit @cassiabaggins @animallover81

[creativebeansofchaos]

Fanfic ideas 3

Character: Thorin Oakenshield x human reader

Imagine Gandalf has a human apprentice that he brought along with him to reclaim Erabor. They have the ability to use some fire magic but they are only really tagging along because Gandalf is worried that if left alone they will accidentally burn down a forest. 

When they originally meet Thorin their only reaction is (¬‿¬). *mmmmm...* Where Thorin’s reaction is more along the lines in “who the hell is this @#%#!!!??” *angry glare ಠ益ಠ.

I love the idea that the reader through out the whole trip is just constantly and idiotically flirting with Thorin. At first it would anger him but after a while they would start to fluster him. *but he would never tell Y/n that*

[supernaturalgirl20]

Thigh riding

Pairings: Agent Whiskey x reader

Warnings: smut 18+, explicit, thigh riding, public sex, unprotected sex.

Comments and reblogs really appreciated 🥰

You waited in the bronco with Whiskey for Eggsy to get the tickets off his friend. Once he appears from the huge house Jack tells you to hop in the back, which earns him a glare from you.

The entire trip Eggsy flirted with you, you knew he only did it to get a rise out of Jack, and it was working. You could see his jaw tick and his knuckles were white on the steering wheel. When you arrive at the festival Jack explains what’s needed to play the tracker and makes his way over to the target. Leaning over to Eggsy you whisper,

“This is gonna be good. She is totally going to blow him off. His too old!”

He looks at you with a questioning look. “Isn’t he your boyfriend?”

“Yeah and? He’s old school with his flirting and trust me she won’t be into it.”

“You were!”

“Yeah but I’m an old soul.”

Sure enough she’s turning him down and you push Eggsy along to go in and save the day.

“I think I’ve lost my touch sugar.”

“Nah you just hit on the wrong girl.”

“Is that right sugar. Are you the right girl?”

“I don’t know, am I?”

He smiles wide down at you and pulls you close by the arm.

“Sugar if you think ima let you away with flirtin with that teeny bop, you don’t know Jack Daniels.”

“Ooh I’m so scared baby.”

“Come on no need for us to hang around now.”

He pulls you along into the empty parking lot and sits into the bronco. He pays his lap “hop on baby.”

“What!”

“You heard me darlin, don’t make me repeat myself.”

Hoping onto his lap you look at him with a shy smile. “You don’t want us to…here! Anyone could see us I’m not..”

“Oh no! You misunderstood me darlin, you won’t be getting my cock today, if you want to come, it’ll be on my thigh.”

“But I…”

“You’ll do as your told Lil lady. Punishment for thinking you can flirt with another man. Now get to riding.”

You position yourself on his thigh and grip his shoulder for leverage. He grips your hips tight and spreads his legs wider. You begin rocking your hips over him and your clit presses down on him and the friction is amazing. You forget that your out in the open to focused on reaching your climax.

“Jack please I need you inside…please..”

“Nah ah ah, you come on my thigh or not at all darlin. Bold girls don’t get my cock.”

You groan in pleasure or frustration you can’t decide. You bury your face in his neck and bite him as a wave of pleasure washes over you. You know he not unaffected, you can feel his bulge as you grind against him, but he doesn’t give in. He whispers in your ear, “now was that so hard darlin?”

“Oh you two! You can’t do that here, you want to fuck like teenagers do it at home.”

“Sorry sir, she couldn’t wait to get home, needed her daddy now!”

The security guard clears his throat awkwardly, “we’ll just move along.”

“Right away sir.”

You bury your face into his shoulder embarrassment flooding off you.

“Can we go now please?”

“Sure thing sugar, daddy needs to be inside you now so let’s go.”

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[mithrilhearts]

Can I you write something on jealous thorin! I am dying to read something like that... Like Bilbo going somewhere and getting flirted by someone (except elves and dwarves) for example by a normal handsome person. And even Bilbo is attracted and stupified by his elegance and his slender body.

Thank you so much for this prompt!! I love writing a grumpy guy. This one was a lot of fun for me and gave me an opportunity to explore a "during the quest" setting! I hope you enjoy it!

prompt "I do believe our burglar has a type,"

word count 2175

relationship(s) thorin oakenshield/bilbo baggins

character(s) thorin oakenshield, bilbo baggins, the company of thorin oakenshield

additional notes this one was insanely fun for me, that's all I gotta say! I'm LOVING these prompts and ideas you guys are giving me!!

-----

Thorin didn’t like Lake-Town.

Namely, the Master and his greasy little sidekick, but they were given more of a welcome and more accommodation than the bargeman had been able to secure. The sooner they were out of here, the better, but there was still a bit of time before Durin’s Day, and there was no need to camp aimlessly outside of a hidden door.

Celebrations and the promise of riches for all had kept spirits rather high, except for Thorin’s. He had tried to put on a mask, the type that was reserved for social affairs that he hadn’t been a part of since he was a much younger lad. Thankfully this was nothing like the social gatherings that had been held between Erebor and Dale once upon a time.

There was that stench of stale ale in the air, as well as fish, but that seemed to sum up Lake-Town entirely. Thorin sat near the end of one table, tapping his fingers against the wood as his glare seemed to be burning into the back of someone at the second table that housed his company.

Feeling an elbow jam into his own, a scowl formed on his lips as Kili wedged himself to sit at the table, sitting far too close for Thorin’s comfort. “Why the long face, Uncle?” Kili chimed, a small slur to his voice as he had a mug in one hand and the other hugging onto Thorin’s arm. At least the alcohol was keeping the younger dwarf from grimacing every single time he took a step. That shot to Kili’s leg had been bound, but certainly not healed.

“I’m fine,” Thorin insisted with a growl before Fili wedged in on his other side.

“You don’t look fine to me. I know that look. You’re angry.” Fili nearly had a sing-song tone to his voice, but at least he didn’t reek of ale as Kili did.

Another nudge at Thorin’s elbow had the leader of the Company squishing in on himself so that he wasn’t bumping elbows. It was a failed effort.

“Could it be because a certain someone has his attention fixated on someone else? I do believe our burglar has a type,” Fili gave Thorin’s arm a comforting pat, not trying to sound teasing whatsoever. Though the same couldn’t be said for Kili.

“What? Tall, dark, and broody?” Kili sputtered out with a laugh, spilling a quarter of his mug across the table. “Though, I do suppose Uncle could be considered tall for a dwarf!”

Thorin’s face was flushed, be it by both anger as well as embarrassment as he felt his ears burn. He couldn’t let his eyes tear away from Bilbo’s back, or the small nods of fascination that seemed to come from the hobbit as he was engaged in deep conversation with one of the Lake-Town locals.

A tall fellow, dark hair wedged beneath a hat and a beard that surpassed even Thorin’s own. Not that the dwarf was examining this fellow that much, but he was one of the more reasonable fellows to look at in this fisherman’s town. Never before had Thorin been concerned about his appearance, not like this, and yet here he was, idly reaching a hand up towards his shorter beard and scrubbing at the coarser hairs that didn’t measure up to any sign of beauty among dwarves.

“There is a solution in all of this, Uncle. You could just go over there and sweep the burglar off his feet for yourself?” Fili offered up, trying to sound helpful, but he was fixated with a glare that told him to snap his jaw shut.

“I am not bothered if Mister Baggins chooses to socialize during our stay. I will not tell my company who they may or may not speak with.”

“Yeah, but it’s what we do with those we speak with that may capture more of your attention, right?” Kili jammed his elbow into Thorin’s arm again. “Or rather, one specific person. You couldn’t give a whit what Fili or myself do while we’re here, or Dwalin or Nori, but you get my point. However, when it comes to him, you care.”

“I do not care,” Thorin insisted once more, feeling like a tightly sealed vault full of feelings instead of gold.

“All we’re saying is that if you’re waiting for the right moment to make your move, it’s probably now. Or someone is going to beat you to it.” Fili always seemed to be slightly more mature one of the two nephews, but his words were just as unwanted as Kili’s.

“You’re both wretched little creatures and the topic will cease, now.” Thorin’s stern tone seemed to ward off more harassment when it came to Bilbo, save for one parting statement.

“Alright, we’ll sod off, but I gotta say, green just isn’t your color, remember that.” Fili gave Thorin’s shoulder a fond pat before moving to fish his younger brother away from the table with no small amount of difficulty. That wound, accompanied by a few mugs of ale, didn’t make it easy for anyone to toddle off.

Thorin was left to his own devices, tapping his fingers again against the table as he stared and simmered and let the words of his nephews influence that agitation brewing on the inside. Just what did Bilbo find so appealing about this fellow he was chatting and laughing with? What sort of stories could a fisherman in this drab place have to tell? So yes, Thorin was jealous, almost on an embarrassing level. It made him even more agitated to feel this way, but then again, these were feelings that he hadn’t felt before.

Life had been hard and duty-bound for so long, and where Thorin Oakenshield had assumed he had seen it all, he was now being sent into an uncomfortable frenzy over some butterflies in his stomach. It made his insides hurt, but there was a quest to focus on, and the rest could wait until after. A mountain was far more important than his silly little love life. Once he reclaimed his homeland, surpassed the expectations of those around him, and set Erebor back on the path to greatness-

Oh, who was Thorin kidding? Bilbo would be long gone by then.

It made a sinking feeling enter his stomach, tearing at those angry butterflies as he dropped his head some. What was more important? Pining? Or extreme focus on winning a mountain? If he let this go, would Thorin ever truly be focused on the quest at hand?

Swallowing thickly as he lifted his eyes to catch a lingering hand at Bilbo’s back, whatever tentative stare had dared to glance towards Bilbo was snuffed out in favor of a roaring blaze of a glare.

Jolting up from his seat and rounding the table towards the next, Thorin held zero hesitation to land a hand next to where Bilbo was leaning on the table - dreamy eyed and seemingly enamored with this fisherman fellow sitting next to him. “Master Baggins, if you don’t mind I’d like a few moments of your time.” Bright blue eyes darted towards the tall fellow who looked rather perplexed at the sudden dwarf’s appearance. “Alone.”

Bilbo gave a small wave of dismissal, “I best take this conversation, though I appreciate the fine stories you brought. You don’t want to see this one in a bad mood,” Bilbo teased, clearly indicating that Thorin was temperamental and unpleasant and- well, maybe he was right. The hobbit shifted in his seat as he and Thorin were left alone, staring up towards the standing dwarf and looking rather delighted - much to Thorin’s dismay. “What’s so important now, Thorin?”

“I did not expect for you to be such an obvious flirt,” Thorin grumbled, a bit of displeasure to his tone as Bilbo’s face twisted to more surprise than anything.

“Me? Oh, that?” Bilbo had a grin twitching on his lips. “Does that bother you?” Bilbo twisted in his seat, looking over towards the bar where his previous company had sauntered off to. “He is rather attractive, isn’t he? A bit rugged looking, with long locks to die for, and quite a nice beard.” Bilbo rubbed the air around his chin as he was describing said beard, eyes darting to the corners as he barely caught Thorin’s frustration in his sights.

“I suppose.” Thorin hissed between his teeth, shifting in his boots and wondering just how far a chair could sail if he kicked it.

“Though I prefer blue eyes, myself. His were brown, and he wasn’t a dwarf. A moody dwarf, specifically.” Bilbo spoke as he patted the seat next to him. “Do you wish to join me, Thorin Oakenshield?”

Thorin was certain his jaw could hit the floor as he stood there and felt his face heat up. Bilbo looked entirely too content and pleased while he stood there like some red faced fool. “I...I beg your pardon?”

“I was wondering how long it would take you to stomp over here instead of huffing over there. Thorin, if you think you’re subtle, you’re not.” Giving the seat next to him another pat, Bilbo used his free hand to claim the stein before him once more. “You’ve been staring at me all night, and ever since we escaped Mirkwood for that matter, but I wasn’t going to bring that up.” And yet he had.

Thorin stood there dumbstruck for a moment before slowly sinking into the seat next to Bilbo’s own in silence. Gnawing at the inside of his cheeks for a good moment, the dwarf wasn’t entirely sure what to say. Had he truly been that obvious? Thorin thought himself a rather reserved fellow who was decent at schooling his emotions and expressions. Perhaps he wasn’t nearly as good at that craft as he assumed. “And all of this was just for show?” He asked quietly, finally daring to look towards Bilbo at his side with extreme caution.

“Really, Thorin…? Are you truly this dense?” Bilbo’s laugh sadly was not contagious. He was an observant sort, at least for the most part, so as he noticed Thorin’s face turn a touch redder, Bilbo quieted down before nudging Thorin’s arm a bit and dropping his voice. “I simply figured you had enough on your mind without adding myself to the mix.”

Which was exactly what Thorin had planned on. Win the mountain, secure Erebor’s future, and then the rest would follow. Well, as he had told Balin before, plans changed.

“Plus, watching you squirm between your troublesome nephews was rather amusing.” Bilbo grinned proudly.

Thorin’s brows furrowed slightly as he shifted his gaze and felt a little bit of that embarrassment start to flow away from his face, though still rosy cheeked. “You’re as considerate as you are cruel, you know that?” Purposely driving that jealousy to a point where Thorin couldn’t stand it anymore.

“I’ve been called worse,” Bilbo reached up just as Thorin leaned down, latching his hands against both of those braids that lined the sides of Thorin’s head, giving them a small tug before both of them came to a pause at bumping noses and foreheads. “Ah, Thorin?”

“Are you truly wanting to ask me a question right this second?” Thorin murmured, bright blues focusing on the hazel ones that were so incredibly close to his own.

“Well…” Bilbo started before his eyes flickered to the side, which caused Thorin’s own to shift, following Bilbo’s gaze.

A table crowded with dwarves all staring with amusement and all the cheekiness in the world.

Thorin pulled back slightly, fully turning his head to face that company of his with a small sigh escaping his lips, but he didn’t look nearly as put out as one might expect.

“Don’t make me come over there and smash your heads together!” Dwalin barked over the table, earning a chorus of laughter - and even a small huff of amusement from Thorin.

Bright blue eyes shifted to meet hazel eyes once more. “I don’t fancy being entertainment for anyone,” he started while sliding from his seat, “save for you, Master Baggins.”

That low murmur just about sent Bilbo melting into the floorboards as a large hand engulfed his own. “I should have started flirting with others a lot sooner,” Bilbo chuckled before being fixed with a look as he too was slipping from his seat.

“I would be most obliged if you saved your flirting for me. Alone. Away from this miserable audience.”

And boy did he not have to tell Bilbo twice. The hobbit followed one a step or two behind Thorin, one of his smaller hands still gripped in a larger dwarven one, and honestly, propriety and expectations could go hang themselves. Bilbo didn’t give a whit at the groans and catcalls that followed during Thorin and Bilbo’s retreat, but no doubt there would be more conversation to be had in the morning over breakfast...

...Or perhaps second breakfast. Bilbo had a feeling that sleeping in tomorrow may be inevitable.