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#though if the strength of an ending makes or breaks a work for you maybe the end message doesnt apply
bug4932 · 1 year
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if you like the characters and picking out the parts that work ward is a lot of fun actually. there are genuine and valuable criticisms of it but the culture about it is getting kinda weird. love a solid post unpacking the problems or making jokes about it but if your instinctual reaction to seeing other people talk about ward is to feel upset and/or join the conversation to talk about how its the absolute worst you might want to consider if you would feel better blacklisting the tag
if youre curious about ward give it a try. its always gonna be a lot cooler and easier online for people to make fun of something; maybe you like it better than you expect. or maybe its awful. you can always stop reading
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sttoru · 9 months
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toji taking care of newborn megumi while reader sleeps?
⟣ tags. dad!toji x female reader. fluff. gumi isnt rlly a newborn but we ball. use of curse words teehee
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“tch—i’m really regretting buyin’ this thing.” toji was running out of patience as he reads the instructions on the piece of paper in his hands. it was all so vague; he’s questioning himself for even trying to figure this stuff out in the first place.
the small coos and babbles coming from megumi sound throughout the living room, the baby sitting in the pillow fort that his dad made him. the correct name would actually be ‘pillow jail’, since the fort wasn’t built for megumi’s entertainment—it was mainly to keep the little boy confined so toji could peacefully work on setting up the playhouse.
your husband was so intensly focused on putting the playhouse together to the point that he didn’t even notice the little thief escaping his self-made jail.
megumi was crawling on his hands and knees, his palms making soft ‘pat’ sounds as they came in contact with the cold floor, pouty lips forming a smile as he crawled his way over to his dad. toji had his back facing megumi, giving the kid a good opportunity to sneak up on him.
“fuck.” toji curses idly as his hand slipped and his finger bumped against his own face. not thinking much about that slip-up, the man continues to put the parts together, until he feels something tugging at his shirt from behind.
toji glances down and spots his son trying to climb up on his back—the journey up to toji’s broad shoulders was like climbing a mountain for such a little thing.
“phack!” the cute voice from below repeats what it has heard with confidence. megumi used all of his strength to reach up to his dad’s shoulders, repeating the used swear word proudly, a series of ‘phack! phack! phack!’ echoing louder in toji’s ears with each movement upwards.
the kid eventually reaches his destination, head placed right next to toji’s, chubby arms circling around his dad’s neck—basically hanging on for dear life.
toji wasn’t even concerned about megumi repeating that bad word over and over. how his son had managed to break free from his confinement was of more importance. his green eyes land on the destroyed pillow fort behind his back and your husband couldn’t help but chuckle. almost proudly.
“i see y’re already outsmarting your dad, kiddo.” toji grins, one hand coming up to stabilise megumi on his back. the baby looks over his father’s shoulder, seemingly inspecting what he was building. toji sighs as his free hand holds onto the piece of paper that included the instructions; “maybe ya could’ve even helped me build this shitty thing if ya knew how to read.”
“sjiddy!”
it was as if megumi was purposely only picking out the curse words. toji chuckles at this and—unlike any other parent—encourages his child to continue for his own entertainment.
“mhm—tha’s right. repeat after me, son.” the dark-haired man nods with a smug grin and points at the half-built playhouse, making sure megumi knew what he was talking about, “that thing is shitty.”
“sjiddy! sjiddy!” the kid repeats loudly and giggles as his father ruffles his hair afterwards in a ‘job-well-done’ manner.
“good boy.” toji laughs softly, moving megumi over to his lap so it’d be more comfortable for the both of them, “y’r momma is gonna kill me if she hears you say such things, though.”
megumi tilts his head up until it rested against toji’s torso, big eyes glancing at the face hovering on top of his; “mama? mama ‘eepy.”
“no, mama isn’t.”
toji freezes in place, megumi gasps in delight. you had awoken from your nap and decided to check in on your husband and son whom you had left alone for a few hours.
and, apparently, you couldn’t leave toji and megumi alone without it ending in your kid picking up on his dad’s bad habits.
you put your hands on your hips and glared at toji. he knew what time it was and he was not about to sit through another lecture. the last time you gave him an earful, he had to sit and listen to you scold him for almost an hour.
“shit.. gotta run.” toji immediately grabs tightly onto megumi, gets up and prepares to flee—not even realising that he cursed. again.
“sjit!” megumi giggles happily, the boy just having fun as his dad runs around with him, unaware of the reason nor of the meaning behind the words he was repeating.
“mama shit!” toji’s eyes widened as he heard megumi combine the two words; mama—megumi’s favourite word—and shit, the bad word your son had just learnt.
your husband knew that that would only increase your fury more and thus shushes his kid while running around the house—your quick footsteps just meters behind them;
“crap. shut it, megumi.”
“crap! dada crap!”
“…”
guess he had it coming.
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gojossocks · 3 months
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“Just a few more minutes.” is what Satoru likes to say when you’re tangled up in bed together. How many minutes has it passed? or was it hours? days? eternity?
and you would roll your eyes playfully, attempting to get off to get ready for work. But he always pulls you back into his arms again until you’re 15 minutes late to work. 
Time never mattered much to Gojo Satoru, it seemed as though he had a lot of time to spare with being left alone. Day and time blur when you’re burdened with being the strongest. After all, the only time he’d count is how much it passed since he lost his loved ones. So really, why does it matter? 
It all changed when he met you, though. 
Suddenly he’s hyper aware of everything. He starts doubting his abilities and strength and it all makes him so uneasy. You have successfully slithered your way inside his heart and he had no plans in letting you leave it anytime soon. 
He became aware of what time you leave for work, what time your shift ends, how your dates could both fit in your schedules, and he became aware of how long his missions are because he realized that he can’t endure more than a day without you. 
He knows that time is scarce for the two of you, so he grabs his chances as much as he can. 
Maybe if he pays attention now and cherishes the ones close to him, maybe it will end differently. 
And so he wishes for eternity within the four corners of your room. Where you’re snuggled in his arms and you’re tracing soothing circles on his bare back. Where he can hear you laugh at his lame jokes and he could observe and memorize every little detail on your face. 
He wishes for this to last an eternity. Hell, he’d be willing to give up everything just to live in this moment with you forever. 
Please, Just this once. 
He never thought he’d be begging for time. Let alone, begging for non-existent gods who refused to listen to him.  
Just this once, he begged.
But oh how the gods are so cruel to mock the strongest. 
All the power in this world yet he continuously fail to save the one he loves the most. 
He’s sobbing uncontrollably now, clearly out of composure. It doesn’t matter when the love of his life is slowly dying in his arms. Your body is slowly giving up on you, your once vibrant look that he loves so much dwindled down into a pale shell of a version of you. Your breath turned shallow, and you’re slowly closing your eyes.  Satoru breaks. 
 “Just a few more minutes.”
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k0juki · 14 days
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some angst with joost (with an happy ending pls)
A/n: I can actually write something over 1k words? Also I think the end is poorly written, so bear with me. xdd
Where have you been?
Joost Klein x fem!reader
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English is not my first language, so feel free to point out any mistakes or errors! More posts here.
Warnings: maybe some abandon issues (I'm really bad at this..)
Wc: 1253
---
Joost was locked in his room all day. You didn't blame him. He was gaining popularity and he was doing everything he could to make the most of it. But you also were scared for him. These last few days were a lot. 
He was stressed and you just wanted to help him. To give him some break from work. But he didn't want one.
"Joost? I made you some tea." You said and opened the door from his work room. He didn't say anything, he was still staring at the same spot on his computer. You didn't know if he was ignoring you or if he was really that busy with work.
You put the cup down on his desk and came behind him. Wrapping your arms around his shoulders. He still said nothing. 
"How is it going Joost?" You asked, truly curious about his work. 
"Good." He replied, it was short and without any sweet playfulness that you loved. 
"That's good." You whispered, with a small smile that was more forced than happy. He was just busy with work, you were repeating in your head, all and all over again.
"Do you wanna..." you began, "maybe, take a little pause from work?" You felt him tense up under your hands just as you finished. 
"Y/n, I have some work to do, can you stop?" Joost angrily remarked. 
"I didn't mea-" you didn't even finish the sentence, as Joost turned around and pulled out of your embrace. His face and eyes were hard, he was really mad.
"I told you to stop bothering me." He spatted at you. "Don't you have anything to do? Or bother?" The more he continued, the more it hurt. 
Inside of your head, you began to panic. What have you done? What were you going to do now? 
You didn't say anything, didn't do anything, just looked down and slowly left the room, softly closed the door behind you.
Why would he do that? You just wanted him to take a break, nothing more. Were you really that annoying? 
You made your way out of the house, leaving all things behind. Including your bag, phone and most importantly a keys. 
You had to clean your head. You didn't really realised you were crying till you touched your face. Where am I going? You thought, you just simply didn't know anything right now.
And the fact that it was getting darker as night approached, didn't help much. You made your way to the nearest park where you and Joost, from time to time, spent some moments together. You sat down on the bench, and just looked around.
You were enjoying the quiet atmosphere around you, but your thoughts were traitorous. Telling you all the bad things, even though they weren't true and real, only you were real, right now, at this moment.
As the night came, you still sat at the same place. You were playing with the rings on your fingers, as the cold slowly started to absorb you whole. 
And then you heard it. The soft call. Someone was calling you, your name.
"Y/n!"
Where was it coming from? Who was calling you? 
"Y/n, where are you!" 
It was getting closer. He was getting closer.  Joost. You could say something, anything, but you had no strength to do that. You lowered your head back down, doing nothing.
"Y/n-" Joost stopped in mid sentence as he saw you sitting all alone on the bench. He ran to you and as soon as he stood in front of you, he slowly crouched down and put his hands on your knees, where you were playing with your fingers.
"Hey..." Joost whispered, but now it was you who were silent. You didn't even look at him.
"I-I, I'm-m-" he was struggling to somehow put the whole sentence together. 
"I-i'm sorry Y/n. I'm so s-sorry." He began and looked down on the ground. "I shouldn't have yelled and been mean to you, it wasn't fair...to you, you were just trying to help me." As he continued, he put his head on your knees, you felt him shaking and your heart broke a little, but he  hurt you.
But he also knew about your traumas. You told him how you can't handle it mentally when someone yells at you, and he promised you to never do that, just to break that promise. 
"I'm so sorry Y/n. I really am." Joost whispered. “I was just stressed a-and I know that it doesn't change anything I said, but I'm still so sorry."
He broke in front of you. Crying by your legs.
"Can you say something...?" He whispered. And then he felt as you took your hands away from his own and he feared the worst. He didn't want to hear it, to go through another loss of someone he loves, but now just because of his stupidity.
He wrapped his arms around your legs, now wanting to let you go. But what he didn't expect was you to put your hands in his soft, blonde hair and started massaging his scalp.
"I forgive you." You whispered. Joost raised his head and looked you in your eyes with his red ones from crying. It took him some time to realize what he'd done, and when he went to apologize, you were nowhere to be found.
This panic that washed over him, he didn't feel it for a long, long time. When he tried to call you, he heard your phone ring in the kitchen, where you left it, along with other stuff he knew you wouldn't leave the house without. 
So he went searching for you, and all the places you could have been. He was also asking other people if they saw you, but they didn't. His last hope was a park. It was where you met. You were there, and when he saw you, he felt like he could finally breathe again.
"You...forgive me?" Joost couldn't help, but ask. His arms lose a bit around your legs, but it was still strong enough to keep you in place. 
"I forgive you." You repeated and took his face in your hands."I know you have it hard right now, but I just, I don't know...got scared a-and left. I shouldn't have done that. To scare you like that too." You felt his fresh tears as you spoke to him. He was really scared you would leave him too.
"I should be the one apologizing to you." Joost's voice cracked and then he kissed your palm. "You're not going to leave me, are you?" He asked with his crystal blue eyes. 
That question made you panic. "No, of course not. I could never." He is the love of your life, you couldn't just leave him.
"Let's just go home. I'm really cold." He stood up and pulled you in a hug. He didn't care about anything as long as you were with him, in his arms. Joost was repeatedly kissing the top of your head, with one hand in your hair and the other around you.
You heard him keep muttering how sorry he was, but you already forgave him. Now he just needed to forgive himself. 
"Here, take my jacket." He said and took his jacket off as he let you go. As soon as you had it around you, he took your hand back in his and together you made your way home.
---
Part 2? Idk...any ideas?
Don't copy or translate my work! Also the picture is not mine! Credit goes to owner!
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purple-babygirl · 1 month
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in the far corner of the forest IV
Pairing: Orc!Bucky Barnes x human!f!reader
Word Count: 6,540
Summary: For the longest time, the kingdom has used Bucky as their number one fighter, forcing him to win their wars for them. The only thing he asked for in return after he was done was that they give him a wife, and they did. They handed him the orphan he picked on a silver platter; it wasn't like anyone would miss her. It would've been perfect if she actually wanted to be there though.
Warnings: mentions of hand injury, idiots in love, feels, jealousy, racism against orcs, angry behaviour, shouting, fight gets slightly physical, bruised arm, crying, angst (i'm sorry). I think that's all.
A/N: good news result in long chapters. thank you from the bottom of my heart for everyone who has wished me good luck with my interview, you guys are angels. please enjoyxx💜💜
~
“You’re in love.”
“I’m what now!?” Bucky chuckled dismissively as he dropped his axe.
Bucky had spent half a day at home, refraining from going to work because of his hand’s condition, but as much as he loved staying home with her, he knew he wasn’t made to take a break.
So he thought he would visit, talk to Sam for a bit and maybe get some pent up ‘feelings’ out on some tree logs. His metal arm was still working just fine after all.
“I said, you’re in love with your human wife,” Sam repeated, smiling so warmly that Bucky wanted to smack him.
“I got her a few weeks ago.” Bucky shook his head in denial of the mere idea of him falling for anyone, let alone a human.
He did love Sam and Sarah, but that was it. They were the only humans he could tolerate. He hated the rest of them. Hell, he hated the human half of himself.
Bucky was just trying to make life easier for himself, that was all. He has been through enough conflicts and he didn’t need this in his marriage too. He deserved to live a normal life like everybody else.
Yes, he was courting her, and maybe he did constantly crave the feel of her body against his ever since she let him hug her the night of the injury, and he was definitely getting hopeful now that she hadn’t tried to run for a whole half day, but that didn’t mean he was in love! Did it?
“And now you’re in love with her.” Sam smirked, knowing how much it drove Bucky crazy that a female human had him on his knees for her love.
“Quit saying that!” Bucky stood up, ready to walk away from his annoying friend.
“Why does it make you so angry that you’re in lo—”
“Don’t,” Bucky warned him, eyes angry and glaring.
“—ve?”
“I am not in love with her, okay! She’s human! Plus, that girl drives me crazy! Do you know how many times I had to bring her back after she’d tried to run in the first two weeks? Five fucking times! That’s almost once every two days, Sam. And she only had one foot working!” Bucky ranted heatedly, desperate to negate his best friend’s theory.
Was he in love with her? And if Sam could see it, did that mean she could too?
“Well, why do you care to bring her back? Why not just let her run?” Sam shrugged, internally dying for Bucky to acknowledge his feelings.
“She could die out there! Humans are weak.”
“So?” Sam probed, intentionally ignoring Bucky’s remark about humans’ strength.
“So— so I signed all those things when she was offered to me. She can’t— I can’t—”
“You can’t?”
“I can’t let her get hurt,” Bucky admitted lowly, sitting down on a log with a loud sigh.
“Why does that make you so upset?” Sam dug deeper.
“Because I think you’re right. I think I might be in love with her.” Bucky rubbed his eye with his good hand, pushing his hair back angrily.
“And?”
“And she thinks I’m the devil.” Bucky’s face fell to his palms.
“Did she ever say that to you out loud?” Sam asked, touching the end of his sharpened blade.
“She doesn’t need to, Sam. I see it in her eyes every time I find her after she’d tried to run away.” Bucky’s voice was broken like his friend has never heard before.
“I thought you said everything was better after your injury?”
“Yeah, but that’s not gonna last forever.” Bucky gave a sad grin, “she’s soon gonna go back to seeing me the same as before.”
“Well, it’s up to you to change her mind, Buck.” Sam patted his friend’s shoulder, giving a squeeze.
Bucky sighed once more before getting up.
Sam was a human. A very handsome one with much less scars and non-icy skin. He would never understand. It would never work. She hated him.
He could continue trying, but it wouldn’t change anything of the way she felt about him and their marriage. She had told him time and time again how she felt about both.
“Going home already?”
“Yeah, I can’t miss the running away bit. It’s my favourite,” he sighed, Sam's laugh trailing behind him.
“Smile at her for a change.”
“Shut up.” I do smile at her. I only ever smile at her.
“Sarah loved the jam by the way!” Sam yelled.
“I’ll let her know!” Bucky yelled back before exhaling sadly.
Sam would never understand. Her taking pity on him those past couple of hours was nothing more than sympathy and likely even guilt.
Sam would never understand that of all the eyes in the world, it seems like Bucky has managed to fall for the only ones that knew how to hurt him, the eyes that would only look at him as a disgusting, frightening monster.
~
When Bucky got home, everything was creepily in place. His door was closed like he had left it and he actually had to use his key to open it for the first time in a while.
Stepping inside, the warm smell of roast chicken welcomed him back.
The house was warm because all the windows were actually shut, too. It was all so calm and homely; the orc was seriously worried.
And then he heard it: his human wife’s sweet voice, humming the melody of a song unfamiliar to him. It sounded like it was coming from the kitchen.
Bucky carefully shut the door behind him, not wanting her peaceful mood to end so soon as he tried to take lighter steps to where she was.
Much to his dismay though, she needed something from the other side of the kitchen and when she turned around she saw Bucky and gasped, jumping embarrassingly high.
“You scared me!” She whined, holding a hand to her heart.
“Sorry.” Bucky smirked, entertained by how cute she looked when startled.
“Welcome home,” she mumbled with a bit-back grin, holding onto his forearms before getting on her tiptoes to plant a kiss on Bucky’s cheek.
She never told him, but she was unbelievably thankful when he didn’t specify which type of kiss he expected weeks ago, and even more thankful when he didn’t object to her pecking his cheek before burying herself under the covers.
Life with Bucky has gotten undeniably familiar lately and leaving him was all of a sudden an idea that didn’t interest her as much as before.
Everything he was saying and doing has brought her closer to him without her even comprehending it.
As the days passed, she had realized running away was too exhausting, too risky, and for what? It wasn’t like she had a home to run to or a treasure buried somewhere or a lover worth escaping her orc for.
Her orc.
Hers.
A word she never felt the meaning of until the day Bucky made her his wife.
Bucky was the first and only one to present to her a taste of something she has never had: the feeling of exclusively owning things.
The smile that graced her face when she brushed her hair the first time with the brush Bucky got her was new and unprecedented.
Her brush, he called it.
Her shoes. Her chair. Her towel. Her clothes. Her books. Her side of the bed. Her cottage. Her kitchen.
And her husband.
Everything was brand new and completely hers.
Nothing was handed down to her, nothing was used before the minute her fingers had touched it. None of the things Bucky gifted her had previous owners, including him and his heart.
Most importantly, she didn’t have to share any of it with anybody.
“You’re home,” Bucky said, a surprised yet very happy smile lighting up his handsome features.
“I thought the wife was supposed to say that,” she replied playfully, going back to the bubbling pot.
Bucky raised his eyebrows at the good mood she seemed to be in. He was liking this.
He watched her sprinkle some black pepper into the soup as he came behind her.
She could feel the heat of his body surrounding her even when they weren’t touching and it had her heartbeat going crazy.
“Thank you, little human,” Bucky whispered, before he leaned down and pecked her cheek as well, his stubble and blunt tusks tickling her jaw.
She felt her whole body jolt with electricity at the simple graze of his lips and tusks on her skin as she closed her eyes.
Bucky left the kitchen and went to the bathroom but she was still hot as if his warmth never left her.
And when she opened her eyes and absentmindedly reached her fingertips to touch her cheek, she found herself smiling too.
What was happening to her? What was this foreign feeling lifting her off of her feet in the middle of the kitchen?
“Sam’s sister loved your strawberry jam by the way!” Bucky shouted to her from the bathroom, making her jump again before smiling to herself.
He didn’t use Sarah’s name on purpose, not wanting to ruin her happy mood as he had noticed how angry she got every time he would say it.
“I’ll make her more tomorrow!” She replied with a grin, proud of her hand’s work, her jealousy long forgotten after Bucky’s words of the night before.
After all, how could she be jealous when she was the one that Bucky was looking at like that?
~
When she finished setting up the table and Bucky didn’t come out of the bathroom, she got a little worried.
He never took too long during his showers, and now that he only had one arm to use, she thought he would cut his showers even shorter.
What if his wound was bleeding again and he didn’t want to tell her and was trying to fix it by himself inside the bathroom? She knew she should have stopped him from going to the yard!
“Bucky.” She knocked on the door softly, wanting to make sure he was okay.
“Yes, little human?” Bucky instantly opened the door for her.
And he looked like a dream.
Steam has surrounded him inside the bathroom, water drops from his still-wet hair dripping down his muscular, bare chest and for the first time since Bucky has been naked around her, she found herself looking at him. Actually looking.
Bucky’s chest was so broad, beefy and ribbed down to his abdomen. Scars of all sizes and shapes littered the beautiful, icy greyish skin, a reminder of the battles he had fought and all the sacrifices he had made.
Her heart clenched at the sight, a pang of sympathy coursing through her as she could only imagine the pain he must have had to endure.
Still, she found her hands tingling in curiosity, desperate to know what tracing the healed skin would feel like under her fingertips.
Bucky was a sight for sore eyes, a sight that both captivated and unnerved her, stirring a flurry of unfamiliar emotions in her chest that she struggled to contain.
She averted her gaze, feeling a wave of embarrassment wash over her at the unexpected intimacy of the moment.
“Are—” she chocked, her voice barely above a whisper as she coughed it out, “are you okay? You took a while.”
“Yeah, I’m just having a hard time drying up my hair with one arm,” Bucky reassured her, chuckling lightly at his dilemma as he let the towel around his neck drop.
He was completely oblivious to the way he just made her face burn up as her thoughts spiraled out of control.
“Come.” She took Bucky’s hand in hers, careful not to squeeze his palm, and led him outside to their bed.
It took Bucky a second to move his feet, but when he did, he felt like he was being carried on top of a cloud.
She felt herself drawn to him in a way she couldn’t quite explain, her heart pounding with a mixture of nervousness, curiosity and… desire. A new sensation was tingling all over her body, specifically in places she didn’t need to be tingling right now.
Positioning herself between his parted legs, she reached to take the towel from around Bucky’s neck.
His eyes watched her, surprise flickering in them as he realized what she was going to do, unable to believe what was happening.
Sensing her nervousness, Bucky offered her a reassuring, grateful smile, silently encouraging her to continue.
And as she began to carefully pat his damp hair dry, her touch tentative and her eyes focused, he felt warmth welling up inside him.
She couldn’t help but steal glances at his bare shoulder and chest, her cheeks burning with embarrassment at the engrossing sight. It was a feeling unlike anything she has ever experienced before, her heart racing with unparalleled excitement.
The awkwardness of the situation began to fade bit by bit as she focused more on the task at hand, in its place growing an overwhelming sense of closeness and familiarity.
Bucky’s hair was so soft under her fingertips as she took the towel up and down the brown locks. She wished she had given herself a chance to touch it more before.
As she finished drying her orc’s hair, she met his gaze with a shy bite of her lip, her eyes sparkling with newfound confidence.
Bucky reached out to take her hands, his smile appreciative as his lips pressed a deep kiss on each palm, silently thanking her for her kindness and care.
~
“I didn’t know your cooking was so good. You surprise me every day,” Bucky praised, as she filled his mouth with more lentil soup, trying not to think of his conversation with Sam or the way his body was still on fire from the mere act of her drying his hair for him.
He couldn’t even believe she was feeding him after seeing him struggle to keep the food on his spoon using his left hand.
“All the girls at the orphanage know how to cook. They teach us all sorts of things and make us to be good housewives,” she replied, suddenly nostalgic of her days at the orphanage, curious to know how, where and when Bucky got the chance to see her back then.
Bucky didn’t say anything, busying his mouth with chewing some bread as his smile shrank.
She didn’t look happy. Why did she stay then? Was she planning on running away at night that day? Maybe she put something in the food?
“I’m glad you like your dinner though,” she said, breaking the thick silence with a soft smile as she fed the orc a piece of chicken.
“Why didn’t you try to leave today?” Bucky couldn’t hold back.
She was taken aback by his question. She thought he wanted her here.
Was he finally done? Did he want her out? Was he not going to look for her this time? Has Bucky given up on her? Was he going to leave her be had she gotten out today?
Most importantly, she didn’t know how to answer because it seemed like she was done running away from her new life with him, and she didn’t know if she could admit that.
“I– did you want me to?” She asked, her voice strained as she tried to hold in the tears.
“No! No, of course not!” He assured her quickly.
“Then?” She chewed on her lip.
“I don’t want you to stop running if it makes you feel alive,” Bucky told her, his blue eyes gushing with love he didn’t intend to show, “I’m willing to go to the ends of the earth to find you.”
“What?” She wasn’t expecting this at all, all the tingles she had hardly managed to shake off after drying Bucky’s wet hair coming back to attack her.
How were these words coming out of an orc! And why did they make her heart stutter in its beats?
“I love your fiery spirit and I’m afraid I’m killing it by keeping you here against your wishes. I never want to be the one to snuff your fire out.” Bucky admitted, eyes sincere as he watched her.
She just stared at him for a moment, stunned as her heart skipped yet another beat.
If he only knew that he was the one who had managed to bring this fiery personality to life.
Bucky respected her silence and went back to enjoying his dinner, not wanting to push her for a reply. She could take her time.
She kept staring at him in confusion for another minute before taking her almost untouched plate and getting up.
She almost ran to the kitchen with her hand on her heart.
What was going on with her? Her heart wasn’t seriously beating this loud for the orc. Could it be?
He sounded so selfless and spoke so gently like he has never before and she was overwhelmed.
His words were doing things to her that she has never felt before. What was wrong with her?
She knew she had caught herself staring at him without a shirt just minutes ago, maybe admiring his eyelashes as he slept in some early mornings, but she rendered it curiosity and nothing more.
She shook her head, her thoughts startling to her as she emptied her plate in the garbage and started washing it vigorously.
Bucky no longer had an appetite, sighing at her reaction.
He told himself he could understand, but it was still hurtful the way she jumped out of her chair.
He left his plate on the table, not wanting to invade her privacy by going to the kitchen before leaving the cottage altogether.
He probably shouldn’t have said anything.
~
She revisited the subject the same afternoon though, not wanting there to be any misunderstandings between her and Bucky. Not any longer.
“I don’t wanna leave anymore,” she admitted timidly, making Bucky’s smile betray him and his usual frowning.
“But I don’t like being locked away in here all day either,” she said carefully, scared to upset him.
“Where do you wanna go? The forest is dangerous, little human.” Bucky was back to frowning at the thought of anything bad happening to her again.
It was torture for him when her foot was still healing and he was the most relieved when it finally did. He couldn’t just let her roam around when she didn’t know the area.
“Take me out when you come back from work maybe? Or even on your day off,” she suggested, desperate to see the world.
“And go where?”
“Anywhere. We can walk around the woods before it gets dark, you could show me your shop, I could meet Sam? Or we could even go to the market!” She suggested eagerly.
She has been locked up for so long and she didn’t want to continue her life like this.
Bucky actually thought about it and he didn’t hate the idea. Taking her out with him would ensure her safety. He would be by her side and he would protect her. He also liked the thought of taking her out and properly courting her even if she didn’t know that that was what he was doing.
He said he didn’t want to kill her spirit by keeping her in here and she gave him the solution.
“Okay.” Bucky nodded at her with a smile.
“Okay?” She exclaimed happily, not believing Bucky would actually take her out to see around.
“Okay.” He nodded again reassuringly, her happiness making him laugh.
“Well, don’t you have tomorrow off?” She asked suggestively, gesturing to his hand.
Bucky laughed, nodding, “put your shoes on.”
“Thank you, Bucky.” She involuntarily gave his healing hand a squeeze, kissing his cheek before running to get her shoes.
Bucky swallowed hard, hoping he would be able to hold himself together and not completely melt under her sweet company.
“You’ve got to promise me though,” he said.
She looked at him questioningly as she slipped one foot into a shoe.
“No running away, little human.”
“No running away. Promise.” She promised, shaking her head with a shy smile.
Bucky smiled big, taking her smaller hand in his as she grabbed her basket in the other, ready to browse the market with her husband.
Her husband. That was starting to sound unquestionably comforting.
“Oh, and one more thing.”
“What?” She tilted her head with a grin.
“You owe me a kiss,” Bucky said, his tone serious.
“No, I don’t! If anything, I just gave you an extra kiss!”
“Yes, you do. From that morning. You’re still one kiss behind!”
“I just made up for it!”
“Doesn’t count. That one covers the night before.” Bucky shrugged, a smile etched on his lips.
“Okay, fine.” She kissed Bucky’s cheek, “stop going around saying other girls’ names though.”
Bucky laughed, “I only know one!”
“Still too many,” she whispered under her breath, but Bucky heard it, smiling from ear to ear as he took his hand in hers, taking the right path out of the woods. ~ It was a beautiful afternoon, full of warm sunshine and fruitful deals. She has got some pretty good stuff for really good prices.
She couldn’t believe Bucky actually gave her pocket money.
He didn’t want her to have to ask him for money every time something caught her eye. He wanted her independent, fulfilled and brave as she bought herself whatever her heart desired.
Her heart was so full and her smile was inerasable.
Bucky didn’t let go of her hand all day and she actually liked it so much that she never complained. The feel of his calloused skin against her soft palm wasn’t like anything she has felt before.
She didn’t want to let go of his hand even while looking at the different stands and booths at the market.
But she eventually liked the flower stand too much and told Bucky she would take a look at them while he continued buying them the fruits he was picking.
“Good afteroon,” a smooth voice interrupted her admiration of the potted plants before her, making her look up for a second.
“Good afternoon.” She smiled coyly.
“Any favorites?” The handsome man inside the booth asked her.
“All of them,” she giggled softly, the sound catching Bucky’s ears at once.
The man laughed back, “okay, I think I have something special for you. How about this one?” He brought her a purple flower from the batch hidden behind him inside the booth.
“Oh, how beautiful! What is this one?” She wondered, amazement sparkling in her eyes at the sight of the pretty petals.
“That is a Globemaster Allium. Pretty, isn’t she?” He asked, staring at her desirously as she looked at the flower.
“Yes, she’s stunning!”
“I’m Cole by the way—”
She heard Bucky clear his throat next to her and looked up at once, the innocent awe in her eyes softening the orc a little.
“Look, Bucky! Isn’t this the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen?” She pointed to the flower pot excitedly.
Bucky leaned in, his frown scaring her a little, her breath hitching when his lips tickled the shell of her ear, “no, little human, you’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”
She chocked on her own saliva, hiding her hot face with her hand as she coughed, “Bucky!” She whined with a shy smile.
Where did that come from!
“Let’s go,” Bucky said with a nod of his head, eyes stern as he glared at Cole.
“Can—” She held his wrist, “can I have it?” She asked softly, gesturing to the flower pot.
Bucky wanted to say no. He didn’t want her to have this farmer’s flower. But he couldn’t say no to those hopeful, beautiful eyes of hers.
“Fine.” He watched her get the money out of her pocket and she smiled gratefully as she almost set them down on Cole’s counter.
“It’s on the house,” Cole said, still smiling dreamily at her.
She could all but swallow as she gave a polite smile back before looking up at Bucky for help.
“Take your goddamn money.” Bucky made a quick job of paying for the flower, taking the money from her and slamming it on the counter, making the whole booth shake.
He quickly took his wife home, deciding that was enough socialization for the both of them for the day.
She wasn’t going to lie, she was loving jealousy on her orc. It felt so intoxicating to have someone love her so much that he was jealous of other men talking to her.
She wouldn’t tell Bucky, but she would probably spend the nights of the next week smiling at the wall every time she remembered how he held her hand back home just a little bit tighter that day.
Her own heart was running wild at the sight of the orc now and she didn’t want it any other way.
~
“Now you know how it feels,” she teased with a smile as they were getting ready for bed.
Bucky couldn’t let it go, talking about how they were never going to stop by that farmer’s flower booth ever again.
“That’s not the same! I was never into Sarah! But that man was openly ogling you!” Bucky grumbled, his frown digging deep into the skin of his forehead.
“He was just being nice, trying to sell his flowers,” she laughed, upsetting Bucky even more.
How couldn’t she see it? The guy was all over her!
“He was flirting and you were all giggles and blushes.” Bucky copied her, going to the bed and burying himself under the covers, facing the wall.
He understood now why she had done that.
“Hey, that’s my spot!” She joked, not knowing if Bucky was being serious.
“Not tonight,” he murmured from underneath the covers.
“Bucky,” she whined, uncovering her orc’s face.
Bucky didn’t reply, pushing himself closer to the wall.
She tried to bring him on his back by the shoulder like he so easily did her a couple of night ago, but he was too strong for her and his body wouldn’t budge.
She huffed, “okay, you left me no choice.”
Bucky remained still, wanting to see what she meant by that as he felt her shift behind him.
Before he knew it, she was on top of his bicep, trying to slot herself between his body and the wall.
“What on earth—”
“You started it, Bucky!” She said, voice determined as she kept pushing, trying to squeeze herself in the small space accessible.
Bucky looked at her in amusement for a second before moving back, making her body drop as larger space became available.
She landed with the tiniest “ouff” on the mattress, facing Bucky on her side with her back to the wall, its coolness helping soothe the heat rising to the surface of her skin.
That was the closest she had been to Bucky since their hug the night of his injury, face to face as his passionate sapphire eyes watched hers.
“Hi,” she whispered, heart in her throat.
“Hi,” Bucky replied with a charming smile, smoothing some of her ruffled strands back in place.
She stared at the orc’s eyes, not the slightest bit scared of the fact that she was trapped against the wall by his huge body.
“You’re not the only one who wants to be loyal to this marriage, Bucky,” she said, surprising Bucky and herself, “I don’t want the farmer. I don’t want anyone else.” but you.
Bucky smiled in disbelief, taken aback by her words, and she took it as permission to move closer to his chest. He instinctively wrapped her up in a protective hug, wondering how he was able to hold himself back from kissing her.
She pushed her face into her orc’s chest, his scent and warmth engulfing her into a protective bubble.
She couldn’t believe she said the words she has just said and it made her bury her burning face deeper in Bucky’s arms.
He could only hug her tighter, his nose in her sweet-smelling hair as his smile grew bigger.
This moment right there was everything Bucky has ever wished for. He could die a happy orc right then and there.
~
It became a habit for them to go out to the village on Bucky’s day off. They were both having a great time, getting closer and falling harder.
Cole hasn’t spoken to her again after learning that the snow orc was actually her husband, and she respected Bucky’s feelings and never approached Cole’s booth no matter how pretty the plants on his stand were.
Market outings were their thing now and she wasn’t going to let anything ruin that.
She didn’t want anyone else’s attention but Bucky’s anyway. His hand has almost fully healed and she could now squeeze it all she wanted whenever she got excited about anything they encountered.
One thing did occur that annoyed her though and that was the way the jewelry lady would look at her every time she and Bucky would pass by. The woman had so much pity in her eyes when she saw her hand in an orc’s and she hated it.
She despised the way people misjudged her orc when he was far better than any human man she could’ve ever ended up with.
Yet, the lady kept giving her those pitiful looks, probably thinking Bucky had enslaved her or something.
But enough was enough.
When Bucky was busy looking at the knives, she made her way to the jewelry lady, determined to put an end to the ridiculousness.
“He is my husband,” she sternly told the lady in the jewelry stand, taking the chance that Bucky wasn’t listening.
“Oh.” The lady quickly gave a kind smile, turning from concerned about her to happy for her, “I apologize for misjudging you, dear. I was only worried about you. We’ve all heard stories about him.”
“Well, that’s all they are. Stories.” She ferociously defended, her eyes still stern.
“I’m sorry,” the woman sincerely expressed her regret, squeezing her hand.
She nodded with a small smile, accepting the older woman’s apology.
“I don’t see a ring on your hand.” The jewelry lady gestured to the collection of rings in her glass box with a wink.
“Oh.”
The sentence caught Bucky’s ears as he turned away to look at her embarrassed face.
“We didn’t get time to buy one. It all happened so quickly,” she explained awkwardly and Bucky’s expression fell.
“I have a pretty collection if you wanna take a look, and don’t worry about the price,” the older lady suggested kindly.
“No, it’s okay—”
“Choose what you like, sweet thing,” Bucky whispered to her, immediately by her side when he saw her eyes skimming over the jewelry, “I’m sorry I’m not familiar with the human marriage traditions. I should’ve gotten you one sooner.”
“It’s okay, Bucky. You don’t have to,” she reassured with a tender smile.
She didn’t need a ring to know that she was Bucky’s.
“I want to. I want you to wear my ring, little human.” Bucky raised her hands to his lips, placing the softest kisses on her each finger.
Her heart surged as a shy smile spread on her lips, heat rising to her cheeks.
“Okay.” She nodded happily, feeling like she was in a dream and she never wanted to wake up.
Though very expensive, Bucky ended up buying her the ring she chose. It was the prettiest gold ring with a moss agate blue diamond.
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She tried to talk him out of it, wanting to pick something cheaper, but Bucky wouldn’t have it.
She has never felt as special as she felt with Bucky’s ring on her finger. It was the prettiest thing from the most handsome orc.
And in that very moment, she was the happiest that she trusted her gut; that she gave Bucky, and herself a chance for this marriage to be something more than a contractual deal.
Bucky couldn’t believe she has finally let him make her his. When he slipped that ring on her tiny finger, he felt like he was king of the world.
While walking back to their cottage, a new dream got unlocked inside of her, one that included her and Bucky and their very own little stand in the market.
“Can we stop by the shop before we go home?” She asked tentatively.
“Sure, why? Did you forget something there yesterday?”
She has been to the shop a couple of times, curious to meet the important people in Bucky’s life and possibly have friends of her own, too.
“No, just wanna show Sarah the ring,” she said, a shy smile lighting up her happy face.
Bucky brought her hand to his lips, kissing her ring finger this time, “to the shop it is.”
~
Everything was going amazingly and she wished with all her heart that it would stay that way, but unfortunately, the very next day was a day for another fight that none of them saw coming.
Bucky still hasn’t recovered from her little stunt a few weeks ago and today he came back to find the cottage empty again.
He should have locked the door. He shouldn’t have trusted that a ring on her finger might stop her old habits or give her a magical change of heart.
What about all the small moments she had shared? Did those mean nothing to her?
Bucky’s anger and feeling of betrayal wiped away everything nice that had happened between the two of them, only remembering that she never wanted to be here in the very first place.
“Why are you so adamant about making me lose my mind?” Bucky asked, pushing her inside and slamming the door behind them.
“I’m not! Would you just listen?!” She yelled back, startled by the harsh treatment.
“What the hell were you thinking?!” Bucky shouted as if he didn’t hear her.
“I was just—”
“Wandering through the forest alone is dangerous, I’ve told you time and again, and yet you keep doing it!”
“Would you listen to me?!” 
“No! You acted like you would stop running, so what changed?!” Bucky threw his big arms in the air, making her take a step back.
Bucky looked bigger than he usually did when he was livid like that.
“I wasn’t running!” She repeated, her voice tinged with anger of her own at the distrust.
“Stop lying!” Bucky growled, roughly grabbing her by the arm.
“I’m not lying,” she insisted as she tried not to wince at the way Bucky held her forearm, her jaw clenched defiantly.
“Then what were you doing up the hill, huh?” Bucky unconsciously squeezed her arm harder.
“You’re hurting me.” She tried to pull away, but Bucky wouldn’t release her.
“You think you’re the only one who has fucking feelings?” Bucky shook her in his hold, unintentionally bruising her further.
She cried out but it fell on deaf ears, “Bucky, let me go!”
“Do you think what you do doesn’t affect me just because I’m not a goddamn human?!” He forced her closer, making her tears fall as he barked in her face.
His words hung heavy in the air, echoing through the spacious room.
“Bucky, please,” she tried again, not wanting to fight anymore.
Bucky finally listened, suddenly shocked at his actions as he let her arm go.
It’s been so long since he had made her cry and he just ruined everything good he had worked on building with her.
She just stood there, whimpering in pain as she held her arm to her chest.
Bucky watched her roll the sleeve of her winter dress up to look at her arm and there they were: thick fingerprints on her flesh.
“I— I’m sorry,” he whispered, trying to get closer to look at her arm, swallowing hard.
To his surprise, she let him.
“I’m sorry, little human.” Bucky wiped a few of her tears away, regret evident in his voice.
“I wasn’t running,” she repeated, pushing her hands in the pockets of her dress, “I was collecting berries to decorate the cake I made earlier.” She pulled handfuls of now ruined wild strawberries, raspberries and blackberries out of her pockets and dropped them on the wooden table for him to see.
She left Bucky alone to stare at the berries and went to the kitchen.
And boy did he stare.
He felt so stupid and ashamed at the way he had reacted. He just hurt her and she wasn’t even trying to leave. He wouldn’t let her explain either and had unjustly judged her.
She got out a cold water bottle from the fridge, pushing it to her bruised arm.
Bucky walked into the kitchen, shame branded on his face.
“Are you okay?” He asked, not knowing what to do to correct his mistake.
“What do you think?!” She irritably snapped at him, waving her bruised arm in the air.
“I just wanted to help!” Bucky barked back.
“Well, I don’t want your help!” She shouted.
“Fine! Don’t want it!” Bucky walked out, his feet stomping on the wooden floors.
He stormed out of the cottage, violently slamming the door behind him.
Bucky then realized what he has just done and how he had made the situation even worse. He kicked a rock so hard he was sure it flew to the other side of the forest as he saw birds flying disruptively.
“Damn it!” He yelled out loud, slamming his fist to the door, making her flinch inside the cottage.
The fight between the orc’s rough exterior and his rather tender feelings for her was torturing Bucky. What he meant to show was that he cared about her and was worried for her, but instead he’d done what he’d done.
She, on the other side of the wall, irately got out of the kitchen with the trash bin and swept the berries from the table, throwing them in the garbage.
When Bucky got inside again, she was cleaning the stain of the berries from the table, her features still twisted in a frown.
He opened his mouth, trying to think of anything he could say to fix this, but nothing came out. With a sigh, he left the cottage once more, leaving her all alone.
She sat down with a huff, throwing the cloth in her hand across the room.
She let her tears run in frustration.
It was supposed to be a peaceful night where they enjoyed a delightful desert that she has worked hard on making and was going to work hard on decorating.
She was trying to start a life with him. Why did he have to ruin it like that? She wasn’t running. How could she make him believe her?
She desperately wanted, needed Bucky to trust her.
She cried harder, feeling helpless in the face of her orc’s rage as her heart clenched at the thought of a happiness gone so soon.
Part V
~
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shibaraki · 11 months
Text
LIKE REAL PEOPLE DO ┊ TODOROKI SHOUTO
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synopsis: slow to heal and forced on sick leave, a lonely Todoroki Shouto decides to download the latest popular app, Enigmail, to cure his boredom. he finds you. the rest is… well. moderately disastrous.
tags: NSFT, AFAB reader, pen pal au, hero personal assistant reader, prohero shouto, strangers to friends to lovers, injury recovery, online friendship + eventual romance, feelings development, misunderstandings, identity reveal, pining, sexting, masturbation (male chara), making out + heavy petting, getting together, *slaps roof of fic* you can fit so much fluff in this thing
wc: 17K
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It started unexpectedly—with a tremor.
Rather, it started with Oda Shuichi, the prolific villain known as Tremor. At the time of the incident his quirk had been unregistered, but doctors quickly found that it severely affected an individual's motor neurons. According to them the length of time that he has a five point touch hold on someone influences how long they will lose motor function—and how poorly their muscles atrophy.
Shouto spent three uninterrupted minutes trapped in his clutches.
“I promise I’ll come by and visit whenever we can. You’ll still get updates and reports through your work email,” Midoriya tried to assure him with that signature smile, brows drawn together into an almost pleading expression. “It’s just for a little while!”
“For a month,” Shouto pointed out petulantly. Nori, his elderly adopted cat, stirred from her place on his stomach while restless fingers combed over her short pale fur.
“A month,” Midoriya parrots. He offers an apologetic grimace and leans over where he lies horizontal, slumped and agitated, to fluff up the couch cushions behind him. The newly crowned Symbol of Peace obviously felt needlessly responsible for the situation at hand. Shouto had only allowed Tremor to grab him so Deku and Suneater could get the hostages out, after all.
“Taking a break isn’t so bad, Shouto. And Hawks told me you’ve yet to actually use any of your vacation days,” he continued. “Even Kacchan takes time off. Do you know how many hours you have to work to outdo Kacchan?”
“I’m sure you could tell me exact numbers”.
“Don’t be mean,” Midoriya said, dithering as he peers around the room, slightly unfamiliar now that the furniture has been temporarily moved around to make navigating the space easier. Thanks to an on-call specialist Shouto would still be able to walk in short bursts, but he’d have to gradually build up strength and stamina over the weeks to come.
A pleased sound reverberated in Midoriya’s throat as he finally discovered the TV remote, setting it beside Shouto’s phone on the arm of the chair. “Okay. There,” he hooked an ankle around the coffee table and dragged it a little closer. “If you need us to get you anything from the store just text us”.
Shouto grumbled. Midoriya sighed, fondly exasperated at the childish display. Before leaving he moved the nearby pair of crutches within reach, listing off all the things he can think of, “Hey, maybe you can catch up on Quirky Hearts now! Or read that series Iida said you’d enjoy. There’s that new app I heard about, too. Enigmail? That might be fun”.
The anonymous pen pal app, Enigmail, exploded in popularity after its release in the spring. Shouto barely knew a thing about it, only that you needed to be over eighteen and chatting partners were assigned at random. Nothing about that sounded tempting.
Midoriya’s suggestion hung over his head for the rest of that afternoon. Quirky Hearts droned on in the background. Halfway through the first episode Shouto had yet to retain any information. Nori hardly left her spot. Jaws stretched wide around a yawn, lips pulled back to display what remained of her teeth. He liked to think she sensed his inner turmoil, though realistically, she was likely too lazy to move.
Curiosity prevailed in the end. The logo featured a pink post mounted mailbox, the slot unhinged to receive a folded paper plane. Shouto opened the app onto a pretty basic interface that followed an almost pastel theme. The profiles are barebones. He supposed that was purposeful. It asked for pronouns and a nickname, offering the option to pick an icon from their default library, but nothing more.
From what he could discern skimming over the rules he would be assigned to a random chat room with another person in a speed dating style interaction. A timer would count down from two minutes and upon completion prompt the user to either switch partners or remain talking.
A simple concept. But anything had sounded better than sulking horizontally and staring dead eyed at reality television for the remainder of his night. And when was the last time he met somebody new?
Almost every username he could think up had been taken. Even his hero name was unavailable. In a last ditch effort he settled on a miraculously accepted Sooba and scrolled through the icons. “Hey, it looks like you,” he murmured, pleased by the regal white cat icon. She hadn’t heard him, but sunk her dull claws into the meat of his forearm as he turned the image to her, those dramatic yellow eyes dilating at his coo, “Don’t worry. You’re the only Nori in my life”.
Shouto clicked start.
The first few users are odd, and without tact. Others communicated in languages he couldn’t understand. He stuck around regardless—luckily the developers had thought to include a translation tool, and Shouto managed to befriend one or two people with innocuous pictures he’d taken on previous patrols alone.
Then there’s…
XpLoveGuest ▻ Hey sexy
By that point early evening had already flooded through his balcony doors and drenched everything in a gauzy orange glow. His nose wrinkled. “You have no idea what I look like,” he thought aloud, switching to his right hand to roll the ache from his left wrist
▻ ASL?
Shouto frowned in faint confusion. He minimised the app to search up the term. Results flowed in, and after a brief look over everything he discovered they all repeated the same description. It’s an old acronym.
His thumbs tapped across the keyboard in quick succession.
Sooba ▻ Age: 27 ▻ Location: Tokyo ▻ Sex: No thank you
The chat immediately disappeared. A loading symbol blinks in the centre of the screen. He snorted, and suddenly a new chat opened with a different username blinking at the top corner. It’s a bit on the nose.
‘InsertNameHere’.
You shared the same default cat icon, which he took as an immediate plus.
But a minute elapsed and nobody spoke. There was an unusual trepidation on your part. Shouto chewed his bottom lip. He contemplated starting the conversation when suddenly three dots skipped across the screen, indicating the other user was typing something.
InsertNameHere ▻ You’re not going to send me a picture of your dick, are you? ▻ If you have one that is.
Shouto’s mouth parted in soft surprise, then pressing defensively thin, and he had glanced around his living room as though someone were there to witness this weirdness alongside him.
Sooba ▻ I have one.
InsertNameHere ▻ Ok. Well I don’t want to see it.
Sooba ▻ It sounds like you see a lot of dicks.
Not once taking his eyes away from the screen, Shouto felt for the TV remote and paused the show, brow arching at your next response.
InsertNameHere ▻ And it sounds like you’re new here.
Sooba ▻ I am. My friend recommended I try this to cure my boredom while I recover.
A few beats passed. He eyed the countdown looming over your shared interaction, conscious of how little time is left. You were the first interesting person he’s come across. Though he supposed that isn’t saying much.
InsertNameHere ▻ Recover? That sounds bad. Are you alright?
Sooba ▻ Injury at work. I’ll be fine in a few weeks.
Just as you were beginning to respond, the timer cut out. Shouto reflexively expelled his frustration and Nori lifted her head toward the abrupt movement of his chest, ears twitching. She blinked up at him in disapproval for shaking her. “Sorry sweet girl,” he murmured, wearing a small smile as he scratched under her chin. So temperamental.
A familiar pop up in the cartoonish shape of a postcard covered the chat. Your messages blurred into the background. It read: Do you wish to continue corresponding?
Shouto clicked ‘Yes’. And apparently you did too, because your contact pinned itself to his in-app mailbox.
A melodic chime pinged from his phone. Confetti burst across the off white background in pixelated blooms.
✎ CONGRATULATIONS! You have a new pen pal ✐
InsertNameHere ▻ Guess I can keep you company in the meantime. ▻ You’re the only sane person I’ve come across so far.
Shouto smiled, even as the muscles in his cheeks protested. It’s a stubborn reminder of his condition. He repositioned himself to lessen the strain on his wrists, chin tucked to his chest where his phone is propped, and said:
Sooba ▻ I’d like that. :)
The fortnight that followed is slow to pass. An endless cycle of wake, stretch, eat, lightly exercise as instructed by his physiotherapist, play with Nori, eat, watch Quirky Hearts, stretch. Midoriya stopped by, bringing Iida along with him. Jirou sent him playlists to listen to. Fuyumi called every evening and shared the phone with his mother, gentle in their fretting. He assures them all that he’s coping just fine from the Shouto-shaped depression in his couch cushions.
But there’s also you; the stream of consciousness keeping his seams together, lest he fall apart from the complete and utter boredom he’s been forced to endure. In the beginning he wasn’t sure of the rules. Talking online is not his forte and neither is making new friends. That entire first morning was spent ruminating whether or not texting you ‘good morning’ was strange, and estimating how many times was appropriate to message you before he violated some invisible social boundary.
Normal had been irrelevant until now. Normal, to Shouto, consisted of avoiding his father’s phone calls, sending the occasional concussive text message—indecipherable to even the greatest cryptanalysts—and giving Nori updates in the 1A Grad group chat.
Sometimes he’ll open the app to see you typing, pausing, typing. Imagining you, a faceless someone, equally uncertain about your footing pleases him a little. In the end he figured if you didn’t want to talk to him, you wouldn’t respond. Evidenced by how you often saved him the trouble by messaging first, sometimes as early as five o'clock in the morning. Apparently you worked irregular hours in a rather unpredictable industry. Shouto weighs the possibility that you might be a fellow hero—or something close—more than he cared to admit.
Any trepidation he felt would always dwindle as soon as a notification lit up on the screen. He reads your username and his insides turn over.
InsertNameHere ▻ I’ve escaped to the break room. ▻ Do you ever think about how we don’t have muscles in our fingers? How fucked up is that?
Shouto smirks, pulled away from the conversation at hand. He unlocks the phone in his lap, beneath the kotatsu to remain hidden, an attempt at being inconspicuous as he replies.
Sooba ▻ I try not to think too much about anything.
You throw back a few laughing emoticons and satisfaction washes over him. “You’ve been texting a lot. Who’s got you smiling like that?” Natsuo asks slyly. He’s cross legged, tie tossed irreverently over his shoulder, shirtsleeves rolled up to his forearms, having come straight from work. “A special someone?”
Shouto forces the muscles in his face to relax into feigned nonchalance. “Nobody. Nothing,” he says unconvincingly.
Rei enters the room with a modest tray of dango before Natsuo can open his big mouth. She’s wearing a bi-coloured hoodie. The sleeves slip as she sets the treats down on the table beside the green tea Fuyumi brewed earlier; another gift from Yaoyorozu’s family travels. Natsuo’s face twitches under Shouto’s unbroken stare, which is daring him to bring it up while their mother is here.
Then his phone vibrates and any possibility of peace is shattered.
His mother glances curiously at him, expression soft in the dewy afternoon light, and she smiles. “Are you speaking to one of your friends?” she asks. “Please tell Deku ‘thank you’ for sending me your new Shouto hoodie. It’s very warm”.
The words fill something cavernous inside him. Soothes the ache with gentle wonderment. She smiles down at his hero logo printed proudly across her chest, rubbing the hem between her finger and thumb. A younger Shouto could have only ever imagined it.
“I’m not so sure it’s a friend this time,” Natsuo teases, spoken with a playful, sing-song cadence. “Shouto wouldn’t text at the table and risk facing Fuyumi’s wrath just for a friend”.
Shouto does not pout. “I would risk anything for my friends,” he says, affronted; anything maybe except his older sister's well intentioned nagging. “…It’s a new friend, that’s all”.
Rei perks up, settling on her knees and laying the kotatsu blanket over her thighs. The quiet sound of plates and cups clinking together fade in from the kitchen. Natsuo hums, unconvinced, and hides a smile behind his mug. It's moments like this, when the people he loves are gathered in one place, and he can hear them in every corner of his home, that he’s glad for buying a smaller apartment.
“That’s wonderful, Shouto,” Rei murmurs as Fuyumi pads into the room, Nori not long behind her, threading through his elder sister's ankles. She too arrived right after work, donning a suit-skirt and blouse. “What’s their name?”
His thoughts stutter. Fuyumi’s nose wrinkles seeing the panic stark on his face. “Who are we talking about?”
“Beats me. Ask him,” Natsuo says, taking a stick of dango between his teeth as he tries not to grin when Shouto’s phone vibrates a second time. “I want to know who’s so eager to talk to my little brother”.
InsertNameHere ▻ Sooooobaaaaaaa ▻ I’m on my lunch keep me company
Shouto snatches up his phone to respond. He brings it closer to his face to allow Nori access to his lap. She monopolises the space instantly. “You’re not a teenager anymore, Shouto,” Fuyumi laments. “No phones during family time”.
“I know. I’m sorry, nee-san. I just need to…” his thumbs dance over the keyboard, head ducked in amalgamated shame and apology.
Sooba ▻ Question ▻ InsertNameHere ▻ What is your name?
InsertNameHere ▻ At the personal info stage already? You move fast. ▻ Tell me yours and I’ll tell you mine.
That stirs a faint unease in his gut and he understands better then. Anonymity is what gives people a sense of security and he isn’t exempt from that. In truth, right now he doesn’t want to know what might change if you knew who was on the other end yet.
Sooba ▻ You can call me whatever you want.
“Shouto”.
InsertNameHere ▻ That’s not even a line is it. ▻ Man. You’re dangerous.
Sooba ▻ ???
Shouto stares at the flickering dots by your username. You type, then stop. Type, then stop. As if you were deleting and starting over again. A habit of yours he’s quite endeared to. “Shouto!” Fuyumi huffs, poking a manicured finger into his side. Though short, the nail still causes him to flinch, and he’s quick to stretch his phone out of reach as her hand swipes through the air. “I mean it!”
Nori is jolted. She voices her immediate displeasure and Rei titters into her sleeve. The sleeve with his name stitched into the fabric. He breath catches, like it always does when his mother laughs. “Shouto doesn’t have to tell us anything until he’s ready,” she assured, offering him a gentle look—a look so sincere he feels awful for being evasive.
And his feeble resolve fractures.
“I don’t know,” he confesses bluntly. Natsuo and Fuyumi frown, at one another and then back at him, in unsettling synchrony cultivated through siblinghood. Shouto shrugs and pulls at a stray thread in his jeans cut loose under Nori’s claws, “I can’t tell you a name because I don’t know it”.
Natsuo appears mildly surprised. Fuyumi sinks into disbelief, feet curled beneath her body, going lax at his side. She drops her arm. “You… don’t know it?” she repeats.
“The app is anonymous,” he supplies hastily, attention flickering to his mother, far more worried about discerning her reaction. She’s unreadable. “My name isn’t on there either. We just talk about stuff”.
“Stuff?” his siblings' voices overlap, told apart only by the difference in tone. Natsuo’s shock has melted into some strange mix of pride and innuendo. “Is it that penpal thing everyone has been talking about? Enigma?”
“Enigmail,” he mutters. Natsuo lights up. Fuyumi does not share the sentiment.
“You’re a hero, Shouto! What if it’s someone with bad intentions?” she frets, brows drawn down and together, mouth pressed thin. “They could be tricking you. The internet is rife with predators, and—!”
“Nee-san. I’m a grown man. I understand the importance of internet safety,” Shouto interjects.
Natsuo slumps onto the table with a mawkish sigh, the sound steeped in fondness. “Let him have fun. You know he’s right, ‘Yumi, he’s an adult. It’s a wonder where all that time went,” he says. A few beats later he’s abruptly straightening his spine, “Gods, Fuyumi. You’re almost thirty five!”
Fuyumi glares from behind her glasses. She reaches across the kotatsu and swats lightly at his bicep, “Do you have to say it like that? You’re thirty one!”
“Please. Stop arguing,” Shouto says. He pets the unperturbed cat curled up on his thighs, “You might startle Nori”.
“Shouto. She’s deaf”.
Rei cuts their bickering short as she breathes, “When did you all get so big…” a serene smile hung on her lips, not a hint of grief to be seen. The answers surrounding your identity—or lack thereof—are lost to the nostalgia cloying in his throat.
They return to enjoying tea and dango after that. Shouto sets his phone face down on the floor and turns off vibrate. For now, he wants to ward off further interrogation.
His mother intuits this and steers the conversation in another direction, “Natsuo, how have things been at your new job? Are they treating you well?”
Things are good. Fuyumi’s class would soon be graduating, an award for Best Teacher polished and positioned on her desk. Natsuo had landed the job he always wanted—a medical welfare officer working closely with trauma survivors—and was already making waves. His mother, Rei, finally finished cultivating her traditional garden, weaving tales of lush foliage and water spouts. Touya too has been improving in his rehabilitation programme, according to his psychiatrist’s reports.
A tremor quakes through the tendons in Shouto’s forearm as he lifts his tea to sip the remaining dregs. Yaoyorozu outdid herself this time. If he hadn’t already known the price he would have discerned it from the refreshing, uniquely sweet taste. Thoughts of you cross his mind in these instances without warning. Would you like it? What’s your favourite tea?
Shouto scrunches his eyes shut as if it might wash those thoughts away. How is it that the stranger in his pocket possesses the ability to awaken such yearning in him; he feels mildly ashamed to have realised his loneliness with an audience.
The hour rolls into another. Shouto scrapes the last dango along the skewer with his teeth, jutting his chin to evade Nori’s curious sniffing. “This was lovely, Shouto. Thank you for having us over,” Fuyumi expressed as she carefully ran her hand along the feline's back.
Sensing the finality, Shouto motions to stand and sets Nori on the couch. Everyone protests it. He huffs, sliding a crutch over from where they lay nearby and letting it take his weight. A good decision, he thinks, inwardly grimacing as the blood rushes to his feet, prickling like violent white noise under his skin, and his knee almost gives out.
“I’m okay. The doctor told me I should be trying to move around more anyway,” he tells them, deigning to mention that he expended most of his energy tidying up this morning before their visit. “You’re my guests. I want to walk you to the door”.
Shouto tries not to bristle under their wary scrutiny. A cool hand slips around his arm then. His mother’s natural chill seeps through the sleeve of his shirt and allays the irritation. “We appreciate it, sweetheart,” she says.
“We do,” Fuyumi gently insists. “We’re happy to see you recovering well. Right, Natsu—?”
“Kiss tax!” Natsuo exclaims, oblivious to his surroundings. He scoops Nori up from the arm of the couch. She is comically tiny pressed against his chest. A continuous indignant drone rumbles in her throat as his brother peppers firm kisses to the top of her head.
“Put my baby down,” Shouto deadpanned.
“She isn’t your baby,” Natsuo slides one hand under Nori, the other carefully tucked into her armpits. He holds her close to Shouto’s face. Dramatic round eyes stare back; a flat expression emphasised by prominent cheekbones. Barely a hair's breadth between them, Nori begins to swipe her rough tongue against his scarred cheek. “See? You’re her baby”.
“Mine, too,” Rei rises to her tiptoes and scratches behind Nori’s ear, turning a smile toward Shouto. That same hand moved to cup his cheek. Though far taller than his mother, Shouto tips his head and finds himself feeling incredibly small as she presses a kiss to his forehead. “Your hair is getting long again,” she adds as she pulls away.
“I can trim it if it’s bothering you,” Fuyumi nods, sidling up beside Rei to survey the growth together. She brushes back the wayward strands framing his face and Shouto blinks. “Though, I think I like this look on you. What’s it called? A wolfcut?”
“I’m not sure. This is how Mina cut it a few months ago,” he replies.
Natsuo interjects without Nori in his grasp, now notably covered in short cat hair. He claps Shouto on the back and pulls him into a firm side hug, “She did good. Our handsome little Shouto”.
Initiating physical affection with his family was still a weary affair after all this time, though patently one sided. Having them touch him so freely always left him a little stupefied.
After they depart, Shouto hobbles to find his phone with all the grace of a newborn fawn. It is face down under the kotatsu cover right where he left it. And as it blinks to life, he skips the notifications from the 1A group chat to find your screen name at the bottom.
InsertNameHere ▻ My boss has these awful little nicknames for everyone in the agency. Mine’s ‘Maestro’. Nerd and butterfingers, too, but mostly Maestro. ▻ To do with my quirk and role, I suppose. Good for morale etc. His creativity astounds me (๑ಕ̴ _̆ ಕ̴) ン? ▻ Not that I don’t appreciate it but. Well shit, what about my morale? Lol ▻ You there? ▻ Sorry if I scared you off by getting personal.
Shouto worries at his bottom lip. Maestro. Something new about you. A foreign feeling churned in his chest. Faint, barely there, but new enough for him to notice. He’s not sure how to pin it; whether your mention of working at an agency bothers him or the fact that others, people who are not Shouto, get to see you everyday, close enough to give you a personal nickname.
Sooba ▻ Sounds like you have a good relationship. I’ve got a close friend who sounds similar. People say it’s just his love language ha ▻ And you didn’t scare me off. I’m the one who asked. Some family came to check on me.
He barely thinks it over before adding:
▻ My mother said hi by the way.
Your reply isn’t immediate but it is quicker than he expects.
InsertNameHere ▻ You’re right. I do like my boss sometimes. Maybe. And I love this job but I think it has aged me ten years. My ulcers have ulcers! ▻ Also—telling your family about me now too? We really are moving fast.
A soft huff of laughter jumps in his throat. There’s a distant clamoring near the kitchen. The sound of Nori’s bowl being pushed around the tile. Her absence clicks in place when he looks at the clock. He should feed her soon.
Sooba ▻ Technically it was only my mother, older sister and brother. ▻ But I can relate about the work stuff.
InsertNameHere ▻ Yeah? You mentioned being on leave because of an injury. Do you like your work?
That’s a question he has never asked himself, nor has he ever felt the need to. Heroism was the path life handed to him. The path he ultimately followed of his own volition. Shouto loves his family, his friends. He’s good at his job—enough to have made it into the top ten. And isn’t that all that matters?
Sometimes he would take a long, weary look out the revolving agency doors, recognise the heaviness in his bones and give the entire thing a second thought. But that never made any difference. Because people needed him. And he needed them too.
There’s a fleeting urge in that instance; a temptation to come clean, if only to sate his own curiosity. To compare the idealised image of what you looked like or how you sounded. He’s spent many a shameful night thinking up romanticised scenarios in his mind about what it would be like to meet you in real life. Shouto always squashes it. He doubts you’d believe him.
Ever perceptive to his moods, Nori chooses that moment to pad in from the kitchen and sit herself directly in his line of sight. She wails, demanding attention and lacking any volume control.
Right now he is not a hero but a man alone on two unsteady legs with a small living thing reliant upon him. He’s just Todoroki Shouto. He’s just—
Sooba ▻ As of right now my occupation is ‘Nori’s dad’. I like it pretty well.
Your reply is immediate.
InsertYourName ▻ Oh you have a kid?
Nori’s frustration grows. Her tail swishes back and forth, agitated. “It isn’t time to eat yet,” Shouto tells her, pulling up his phone camera and zooming in. On her next yowl the shutter goes off. The picture is perfect. Mouth wide open, large ears flat and nose wrinkled in displeasure, lips curled up to display her pink gums.
Sooba ▻ [IMG_0243] ▻ Something like that.
It’s a risk and he knows it. Though infrequently his team has posted Nori to his social media in the past at the delight of his fans—she was younger in those pictures, but if you were well acquainted with him there was the possibility of you putting the puzzle pieces together.
InsertNameHere ▻ Oh my god sooba. She’s so cute. Give her everything she asks for, you monster. ▻ Hey. Are those Ingenium themed crutch pads?
Anxiety rockets through him. He pulls up the photo and sure enough, his crutches are in the corner of the frame, laid within reach beside the couch. Secured around the handles are Ingenium themed pads to cushion his palms.
Sooba ▻ They are.
InsertNameHere ▻ Is he your favourite hero?
He turns his phone over in his hands before he types, overcome by an abrupt restlessness.
Sooba ▻ One of them. ▻ Do you have a favourite hero?
Nori wanders off in his periphery and not long after he hears the telltale sound of cardboard being torn apart. You stop typing, replies coming to a halt. He lets out a breath he hadn’t realised he was holding.
It becomes clear you’re offline. Shouto spends the evening imagining your answer—ducking sheepishly at the idea that you might say him, then cringing at his reaction—and reading through his work emails.
Partnering with Hawks hasn’t been the worst thing in the world. Despite his carefree demeanour and general lack of personal space Hawks was professional and meticulous when it came to his work. As promised, Shouto was CC’d into every important thread and forwarded every significant incident report each day. Apparently there’s a big fundraiser tonight that he is unable to attend.
Hawks suggests matching Endeavor’s donation in spirit. Shouto doubles it.
The night air barely touches him. Leaning against the balcony railing he surveys the cityscape. A kaleidoscope canvas. He stares until the pinpricks of light stretch and bend, streaking his vision, regaining shape when he blinks. Nori is curled around his calf, playfully kicking her back legs at his ankle. She’s careful to never break skin.
It’s nearing midnight when you get back to him. A disconcertingly vague reply of:
InsertNameHere ▻ I’ve had enough of heroes.
Shouto waits for you to elaborate before presuming anything nefarious. He would hate for Fuyumi to be correct. She’d never let him forget it.
▻ Shit that made me sound bad, didn’t it? I promise I’m not a villain
He snorts, reclining himself into one of the chairs on his patio. Yaoyorozu insisted upon helping decorate the space. This piece in particular had been chosen by Uraraka, if only for its cocoon, egg-like shape. She always sat in it if she came over; Shouto can’t say he blames her, now curling up inside it himself, leaving one foot flat to the floor for Nori to cling to.
Sooba ▻ Only a little bit lol.
InsertNameHere ▻ I just mean for today! I’ve had enough for today! ▻ There’s… a whole lot of them at this work event I’m attending is all. ▻ See! ▻ [IMG_0589]
It’s the first picture you’ve ever sent to him that wasn’t a meme. Your legs are crossed, turned inward to show more of the showroom floor. There are people everywhere. You’ve overturned your lanyard in your lap, straps dotted with the charity logo, to display the back of your security pass. No identification. Just proof that you’re there—
Proof that you’re a real person, giving colour to the vague, shapeless figure in his head. The figure once outlined only by random tidbits, like your favourite food, the music you like, the movies you loved as a child. The figure now clad in tight fitting, seemingly pearlescent sheer material from the waist down.
—Shouto swallows dryly.
You have nice hands. He tries not to linger on that.
▻ That’s why I disappeared, btw. Sorry about that. ▻ I feel weirdly underdressed.
The logo on your lanyard has recognition prickling in the back of his mind. Hours earlier Midoriya had texted him two pictures from the ‘HEROKIND’ fundraiser Hawks mentioned. One being a selfie of him and an aggrieved Bakugo, each wearing their own fitted suit, and another of Uraraka in an evening gown stood behind the imposing silhouette that was his father, stealthily pointing her middle finger at his back.
He saved that one to his camera roll.
Sooba ▻ In that case I will close the HPSC anonymous tip line ▻ Sometimes people try too hard at those events and forget why they’re there. You look good from what I see.
InsertNameHere ▻ How very gracious (´・` ) ▻ Sounds like you have some experience with this kind of thing. My condolences lmao ▻ But thank you. I’m glad you think so.
Shouto entertains the idea of sending you something back. His eyes surreptitiously flicker around as though being watched. Nothing revealing who he is, but enough to maybe—
The camera captures a few of the modest flower beds and cat grass lining his balcony, Nori coiled around his bare ankle. He looks at his hand. Shuffles his hips further down to mirror your angle and flexes his fingers in his lap. Heat floods his body, guided by the shameless desire to inform the image you might have of him in your own head, too.
Sooba ▻ [IMG_288] ▻ At least you’re having more fun than I am.
You type for a long ten second interval. Then restart. A tedious minute elapses and just as regret creeps in, your messages come through.
InsertNameHere ▻ I’m not so sure about that. ▻ Actually it would probably be more bearable if you were here with me.
The sound of his heartbeat floods his ears. So warm it’s like he’s standing under the sun. Shouto belatedly realises it’s just his quirk, as the steam blows out through his nose. Nori butts his ankle in complaint. He bends to take her into his arms, feeling ridiculous and somewhat bad at being a person.
Sooba ▻ Think so? ▻ Just so you know I have been called socially inept on numerous occasions.
InsertNameHere ▻ Then we can hide together in the corner, get tipsy and sneak bits of the fancy spread.
This—doesn’t happen to Shouto. “Nori. I have feelings for a person I’ve never seen,” he pushes his face into Nori’s fur, and she purrs, feeling the vibrations of his voice. Admitting it aloud only highlights the absurdity. He feels out of his depth. And he decides he’s glad for the anonymity. Grateful, even. Lest he publicly humiliate himself and set off every fire alarm in the vicinity.
Sooba ▻ That sounds perfect.
InsertNameHere ▻ I’ll hold you to that. There’s another one of these coming up in two weeks. ▻ Prepare yourself (ꈍᴗꈍ)
“You’re really not helping,” he continues. Nori rubs insistently under his chin. “Fine, fine. I get it,” She croaks as he presses into the touch, mimicking her movement and cradling her as he gets up.
Before retiring to bed he pulls up Yaoyorozu’s contact. He settles into a comfortable position in the covers, propping his phone on his stomach, and he types:
Shouto : 00:14
I think I need help.
Consciousness eases into him slowly. It’s a sleepy pastel morning. Dust dances in the soft spotlight cast through his curtains. Shouto’s jaw unhinged to release a long yawn, limbs stretching every which way under the covers as his joints click.
Shouto props up on his elbow, twisting in place to reach and unplug his phone. He blinks away the blurriness hemming his vision and squints at the stack of messages from Enigmail right at the top of his notifications.
InsertNameHere ▻ Oh shit. Hero Shouto donated double the amount of what Endeavor gave and he couldn’t even be here tonight. That’s hilarious. Can that guy get any hotter ▻ I didn’t intend for that to be a pun. ▻ These cocktails are becoming suspiciously easy to drink. ▻ You’re probably sleeping like a good boy but I miss you. Wake up! ▻ Have you ever had feelings for someone you’ve never met
The loose tongued messages stop there, at around one o’clock in the morning. Then there’s a seven hour jump to only ten minutes ago.
▻ Oh my god. Please ignore all of that. And then kill me.
Hardly awake, sleepsand still crusty at the corners of his eyes, Shouto’s mind reels as he considers pinching himself. He doesn’t know which part to focus on. Your apparent—and unknowing—attraction to him as a public figure or the implication that you had feelings for Sooba.
But you’re obviously embarrassed. So he bites back a smile and starts with something simple.
Sooba ▻ Good morning to you too ▻ Remember to drink water and take some bufarin.
Sitting upright with legs hung over the bed, Shouto clicks out to his text app by way of distraction. There’s another photo from Midoriya. This time it’s just him. Speckled light glitters along his cheeks, expression beaming as the hero holds a piece of sashimi in front of his pink face. Shouto heart reacts to the text.
InsertNameHere ▻ Send more Nori
He chuckles, sleepy. That makes known Nori’s absence. Strange, he muses. She is usually the one to wake him. Rather than search he scrolls through his albums to find a photo you hadn’t seen yet. It was taken a few months ago. He’d slipped his camera under her chin and pressed the shutter when she looked down, looming over the viewer with a dumbfounded look.
Sooba ▻ [IMG_142]
After a few minutes with no response, assuming that you had accepted his bribe and sought out some painkillers, Shouto braced against his bedside table and stood, phone in hand. Every muscle in his body felt like wet sand, held together by too tight skin. This morning, though, the incessant ache that beat alongside his heart was gone.
Walking still felt as though he was wading through molasses but strength was steadily returning to his physique.
The floor is cool under the soles of his feet as they shuffle down the hallway. There’s a noise in the kitchen that gives Shouto pause. A voice, hushed yet high pitched voice, cooing like someone might to an infant.
He drops into an ungainly defensive stance, pyjama bottoms and all. Worst case scenario they at least hang low on his hips, loose around his legs, leaving room for flexible movement. He rounds the corner without a sound.
And relief beats like a drum in his chest.
Yaoyorozu meets his gaze from the kitchen island where one hand is petting a very happy Nori, sipping from a glass of water with the other. Her face is bare, shadows soft under her eyes, hair pulled haphazardly into a low ponytail as if she had just rolled out of bed and rushed here. Creati in a bleach stained hoodie and leggings. The press would have a field day.
The sight brings a small smile to his face. Their schedules have been misaligned for months. It’s good to see her—if only her expression had not then darkened. “Todoroki Shouto,” she says with all the authority of an older sibling, “What on earth was that text last night? You had me worried sick”.
“Text?” he parrots dumbly, looking to check his phone.
InsertNameHere ▻ Painkillers acquired. Thank you Nori ▻ I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable last night.
“I let myself in with the key you gave me. I hope that was alright,” she continues, quiet and apologetic now. He skims over your reply and switches to check his text app. Sure enough the last thing he sent to her was an ambiguous plea for help.
“Of course it’s alright,” he replies, regarding her with a meaningful look to cover for how sheepish he truly feels. “I gave you the key because you’re always welcome here”.
Yaoyorozu smiles on the end of an exhale, idle hands smoothing down Nori’s cheeks. “Of course,” she echoes, examining his form closely now her anxiety is assuaged. Over him comes the muted awareness that he’s being judged. “How about we go on a short walk for once, since I’m here? The weather is quite pleasant”.
Shouto steps forward with mouth downturned, “Momo, I assure you I’m fine. You don’t need to walk me like a dog,” he says, wincing thereafter at his bluntness. She only hums.
“When was the last time you went anywhere?”
Very uselessly he replies, “I go places”.
Yaoyorozu’s potential to lead and assert had never escaped him, not even in his teenage years, and it was something he staunchly admired her for. But never has he resented his own affinity for compliance more than he does the moment she ignores his pouting and tells him to finish his morning gait training and get changed.
Dressed casually and statuesque in the centre of his living room, left leg lifted to mimic a flamingo, Shouto’s limbs shake far less than previous days. He can hold his phone while he balances now, too. You haven’t sent any new messages. Probably waiting for him to assure you that he isn’t upset, but even so he’s a smidge disappointed.
Sooba ▻ I’m here. A friend appeared in my kitchen. ▻ You don’t need to apologise for anything, I wasn’t uncomfortable. I've received worse drunk texts I assure you.
He switches to his right leg and chews the inside of his cheek. Facing villainy was far less daunting than navigating his feelings.
▻ I thought it was cute.
That’s about as brave as he felt today.
Yaoyorozu resurfaces from the coat closet with a jacket in hand and a pep in her step. There’s something else coiled around her wrist. Nori’s cat leash, red and attached to a blue harness, matching Shouto’s hero colours.
“Can we bring her along?” she asks, bouncing in place. Upon recognising the leash Nori makes her opinion known, releasing a drawn out yowl. “Oh please, Shouto”.
Nori didn’t regularly enjoy walking but she had been trained to do so from a young age. She was peculiar and picky, and Shouto trusted her to let him know if ever she wanted anything—something she never failed to do.
“Are you sure?” he murmurs, bending to tap her nose. It wrinkles, a stray tooth flashing between her lips. “If you get tired I won’t carry you”.
Nori blinks. A lie and they both know it.
Shouto sighs, defeated. “Okay. She hasn’t wanted to in a while so I can’t really deny her”.
“Wonderful,” Yaoyorozu breathes, handing him his jacket before undoing the harness and crouching to slip Nori’s paws through one by one. “We can grab a warm drink to go from the cafe downstairs and talk”.
Shucking the jacket on and flattening the collar, Shouto dithers in the genkan with his crutches nearby. He tucks the wayward strands of hair into a knitted hat and loops his mask around his ears. The scar couldn’t be helped but atleast this way a majority of people would not think to look twice.
They leave the apartment together, all three. In the short time it takes to step out of the building's lobby you still haven’t replied. He shoves his free hand in his pocket, fingers clasped around his phone in case it vibrates.
The establishment across from Shouto’s home has been open for longer than he’s been alive. An elderly couple named Pierre-Louis and Tsutomu run the place. The two men moved back to Japan decades ago to care for Tsutomu’s sick mother, and with Pierre-Louis’ incredibly unusual coffee quirk ‘Bean Boost’, opening a cafe seemed the right route to take.
Since moving here they’ve endeared themselves to Shouto. If they see him on his way to work Tsutomu will often rush to offer him a takeout cup. This morning is no different.
“Mon petit chou!”
Tsutomu slides open the walk up window and calls his name, beckoning them closer. The breeze tousles the short grey curls around his ears. Shouto’s heart near stops when the older man leans out to greet Nori as she stretches upward and almost loses balance. “Tsutomu-san, please be careful,” he says.
“I am still rather spry, young man. Don’t worry about me,” he returns happily, gaze moving to Yaoyorozu when he rights himself. “Lovely to see you again, Momo-chan. Have you come to rescue our prince from his cave?”
Indignant, Shouto grumbles, “I wish you would all stop acting as though I’m a hermit. I haven’t been stuck indoors that long”.
The two level him with a look of doubt. Tsutomu gently pinches his cheek and rubs a thumb over the swell above the mask. “Your pallor betrays you, Shouto. Let the sun kiss you more, no? We worry”.
“Tout va bien?” another voice interjects. Pierre-Louis squeezes up next to his husband, ignoring his disgruntled noise, and brightens when he sees Shouto on the other side. “Mon chou, you’ve emerged! And with two beautiful girls at your side”.
Yaoyorozu muffled a laugh while Nori busied herself chewing on the nearby grass, leash never pulling too far. “Pierre-Louis,” Shouto murmurs, unable to keep the fond lilt out of his voice. “It’s good to see you both”.
“And you,” he beams. The wrinkles by his eyes deepen. Shouto never met his grandparents but he thinks perhaps this is the closest he’ll get. “Are you going anywhere special?”
“We’re just taking a walk, Pierre-Louis. I thought it might be nice to get a warm drink for the journey,” Yaoyorozu spoke warmly and nudged his side. “Where better than here?”
“Bien sûr! Will that be one earl grey and one green tea?”
Shouto nods at her questioning glance, “Loose leaves today, please”, he adds.
Pierre-Louis disappears to make their drinks, shortly returning with two takeout cups, steam pluming softly from the mouth. Shouto swaps his crutch to his right side and accepts the green tea with his left hand, heat seeping through the cardboard sleeve.
“How much will it be—?”
“Nonsense,” Tsutomu interrupts with a sudden switch to English. He shakes his finger, silencing any protest, and his husband gives a resolute nod in support. “Take it, mon chou. Call it a family discount”.
Shouto bids them a dazed goodbye, leaving the walk up window; a lump in his throat that he tries to wash down with hot heat, tongue impervious to the temperature. “They’re very sweet. I’m glad you have them,” Yaoyorozu muses. “What is it they call you? ‘Chou’?”
“Mon petit chou,” he repeats clumsily, accent slightly gawky. “I asked Aoyama a while ago and he told me it means ‘my little cabbage’”.
Yaoyorozu pauses and Nori continues ahead, leaping up onto a nearby half wall with her tail hooked high. She pounces on a crack between the bricks, blissfully unaware of the nearby traffic, trying to eat a ladybug.
“My little cabbage?”
Shouto hums, squinting up at the early sun, rising in a blanket of pale blue and mottled grey clouds. The air is refreshingly cool. “Apparently it’s something French parents call their children,” he shrugs, as though he were not then warmed from the inside out at the reminder that they truly did see him as one of their own.
“That’s lovely,” she says, slowing to match his pace. He’s not tired so much as he is enjoying the morning dew. They follow a familiar path. Turning down a hidden narrow walkway that leads to a neighbourhood park. Nori’s chitters fill the spaces left by comfortable silence.
Yaoyorozu suggests sitting at one of the picnic tables. Tall trees flanked the area on either side, columns rising to create a weave of foliage that shrouded them in gold. The old wood is cold under his thighs. Nori hops up onto the bench, ears flat to her head, and hisses at a dog across the way which hasn’t even noticed her presence.
“So,” Shouto glances over toward Yaoyorozu as she speaks. Her arms are settled on the tabletop, fingers curled around the disposable cup and swirling the liquid inside. “Are you going to tell me what you were panicking about last night?”
He picks at the cardboard sleeve, twisting it, and supposes this was inevitable. Slipping down his mask, Shouto brings the tea to his lips in distraction, grasping for a way to articulate his situation without simply saying: “I have feelings for my anonymous online friend”.
In the end he realises there really isn’t any other way.
Yaoyorozu listens intently, as he expected she would. Of all his well intentioned friends Shouto knew she’d be the most open to his reasoning. Her expression visibly softens while he wrings his hands and rambles about the palpable connection that he first attributed to his own loneliness—
Rambles about you; you, the one now carried with him everywhere, the presence weaving his days into tapestry; you, accepting of his random thoughts, giving of your own; you, unintentional charm and bad jokes and sharp wit; you, faceless and voiceless, the one to receive first and last thought.
He expels his fears. Concerns of who you really are. Of what you might think upon learning his identity—if you wouldn’t like him anymore, or if his own feelings might change after meeting you offline, and if that makes him a terrible, shallow person.
Then he mentions the photo from the Herokind event and her head cocks in interest. “May I see?” she asks. Shouto murmurs his agreement and pulls his phone out from his pocket.
You’ve messaged him.
InsertNameHere ▻ Appeared? Like, teleported?? ▻ I’m glad we’re ok. I would miss you otherwise. ▻ But you can’t know I’m cute. You’ve never seen me lol
Shouto is typing back with unfounded confidence before he realises it.
Sooba ▻ I don’t need to see you to know that.
Then his eyes flicker to Nori, staring up at him clad in her Shouto themed harness, lip caught on her scraggle tooth. He takes a quick picture. Examining it before sending, he notices Yaoyorozu’s slender hands in the background, and wonders if you might be jealous.
He scoffs inwardly at his own childishness and sends the photo.
▻ Not teleported hah, just came in with a spare key. We are out walking now.
“Sorry—I just wanted to reply first,” Shouto clears his throat and presses his phone into her now proffered hand. Given without question.
Something flickers in her expression at your photo; it’s a brief shift that flies over her gaze like a shadow. Her thumbs pinch and part on the screen as she zooms in. “I was there for a few hours last night,” she says. “I recognise this outfit. Would it not be easier to check the list of attendants?”
“…That doesn’t feel fair,” he admits soberly. “I know that’s silly”.
“It’s not silly,” she affirms with a small smile, fingers now moving as she types. “You are aware of your position. You have the resources to find them and presumably they do not. Of course it seems unfair”.
It’s testament to their friendship that he feels no need to check what she’s doing. Her brows furrow slightly, then arch into her hairline, eyes brightening. Pleased, Yaoyorozu locks the device and hands it back.
“What did you do?”
“Don’t worry. I didn't do anything untoward,” she replies. “But I do know who you’re talking to now”.
Shouto’s fingers flex around his phone. “You do?” he breathes, incredulous. Just like that?
Yaoyorozu nods, lending her attention to Nori. “I don’t have a name. But if you want to find them I think you’ll want to speak to Bakugo-kun”.
“Bakugo…?” Shouto echoes.
“I believe your friend may work for him,” she clarifies. Ah. The clamouring in his head comes to a halt. In hindsight it’s clear. Your nicknames make sense now.
“I’ll think about it,” he swallows, bringing his tea to his face for another sip. He finds it tepid and warms it again with his quirk. Yaoyorozu doesn’t push.
They spend the hour catching up on the things Shouto has missed in the weeks he’s been absent, and the weeks prior. Midoriya’s claims of him being a workaholic become a reality he can’t outrun. Tea finished, Shouto takes both cups and disposes of them in the recycling bin. Yaoyorozu stands from the picnic table with Nori cradled to her breast—Nori stares back at him, smug—and they make their way back to his apartment.
“Shouto,” she coaxed, now standing outside the tall glass doors leading to the lobby. Nori’s claws sink into the collar of his jacket as she’s passed to him. He takes her leash from Yaoyorozu, bunching it up; and she covers his enclosed fist with her hand.
“Go for it,” she tells him, giving a firm squeeze. “I’m rooting for you. Just be safe”.
Stepping back into his apartment, his cheeks are warm and his limbs are trembling. You’ve buzzed inside his pocket three times.
InsertNameHere ▻ Oh my god. How can such a perfect creature exist? And her harness! Shouto colours? ▻ I hope you’re having fun. <3 ▻ You know, you never answered my question from last night
“You don’t think I’m hopeless, do you Nori?” Shouto asks the thin air—Nori has already scrambled toward the nearby shoebox, bunny kicking at the corner as she chews. He sighs.
Yaoyorozu’s encouragement rings loud in his ears while he replies.
Sooba ▻ Yes. I think I’ve had feelings for a person I’ve never met.
And it feels like a confession.
Shouto sees the week come to an end before he finds enough strength, physically and mentally, to visit Bakugo’s agency.
Your conversations have evolved. They carry a flirty undertone now, the verbal toeing of the line that makes his heart pitter patter. You send pictures throughout the day. Always angled away from your face. Swathes of skin. A pen between your fingers. Stacked paperwork and an empty coffee cup. The burgeoning skies on your walk home. Comfortable at home, your legs crossed over the other, a fluffy slipper hanging at the end of your foot.
He never knew so much thought had to go into making a photo appear candid, effortless. At one point he purposefully shuffled his workout shorts lower on his hips and spent the remainder of the afternoon mortified with his head deep between the couch cushions.
Liking another person is humiliating. He feels exposed, like a flesh wound that you won’t stop prodding.
InsertNameHere ▻ [IMG_412] ▻ I hope you have a good day!
You’re sitting at your desk, presumably. A slide knot bracelet hangs loose around your wrist. Hand held out over the mouse and keyboard, you’ve pinched your thumb and finger—smudged with black in—together to make a heart shape. It’s cute. You’re cute. He files the pose away for any later run-ins with paparazzi. His PR has been getting on about trying harder when they photograph him for months.
Shouto’s body rocks with the train car as it careens down the tracks and readjusts his grip on his crutch. He smiles behind his mask, sinking into the confines of his hood which he has pulled over his cap. There are eyes on him today. It can’t be helped in such close quarters. But they’re uncertain—too afraid to bother him and be wrong about his identity.
Sooba ▻ You too :) ▻ Remember to take breaks. I read that you should spend five minutes away from your screen every hour.
InsertNameHere ▻ You have to stop making me smile at work. My coworkers think I have a secret husband or something.
Sooba ▻ I promise to send you off with a homemade bento tomorrow morning.
InsertNameHere ▻ And a kiss.
Shouto grabs the nearby pole as he is almost knocked on his feet. Passengers board, others depart, and his heart hammers in his throat like a fist.
Sooba ▻ A kiss?
You’re still typing a reply when Shouto hears the hesitant evocation of his name. It’s timid and hushed, belonging to a person trying to restrain their excitement. She covers her mouth with a gasp when he meets her eyes.
“It is you,” she bubbles. A metallic taste pervades the static air around her, short hair wiggling on end as if it were responding directly to her excitement; behaviour unbefitting of a typical reporter, he notes.
Your text box jumps onto the screen in his peripheral vision, bumping up the chat. He jolts and angles the phone away from her just to be safe.
InsertNameHere ▻ Yeah! A bento box and a kiss to get me through the day, obviously. As my husband.
There are three others a few feet away, huddled together beside a pillar and abuzz with energy. Mild dread churns in his stomach. Definitely not a reporter, then. “If you have a moment…” the young woman spares a glance over her shoulder and her friends excitedly encourage her forward. “Um. Would you maybe be interested in—”
“No,” Shouto replies. The young woman winces at his tone. Ah. She’s embarrassed now. He really should make a habit of lying in consideration for other people's feelings. Fuyumi did mention that, though not in as many words. Before her face can crumple further he continues, “I’m very sorry, that was rude of me. I’m in a bit of a hurry”.
Her relief is palpable, near contagious. Expression softened with understanding she folds her hands against her stomach and ducks into a slight bow. “Of course, I understand,” she says. Somehow it makes him feel worse. “And—I’m glad you’re well, Shouto-san. We’re all wishing you a complete recovery”.
Gratitude bubbles inside him. He smiles, pressing a finger over his mask, and her complexion turns a bright shade of pink. She nods in understanding, scurrying to her friends.
Shouto departs the train without disruption. The conductor takes stock of his gait and the crutch at his side, offering to lay out the ramp, but he politely refuses, stepping onto the platform with ease. He feels good; closer to his other self, the one before his muscles were run through a metaphorical centrifuge.
Sooba ▻ Obviously. ▻ I suppose I can add ‘house husband’ alongside ‘Nori’s dad’ on my list of occupations now.
Blast Zone isn’t far, a fact for which he’s grateful. Bakugo insisted on rooting himself in the centre of the city, right in the spot where all transport routes seemed to meet; there stood the symbol of victory’s headquarters, imposing in the skyline.
According to journalists at PowrStruct magazine The Blast Zone agency is an ode to modern architecture. A steel frame structure surrounded by reinforced concrete, an outer coating embossed with a texture that gives the award winning building the fragile appearance of having been meticulously glued back together while simultaneously being both blast proof and earthquake proof. Shouto cares not for design in general. He does, however, steal a mini Dynamite themed pen from the front desk while he’s waiting to be signed in.
There’s a thin chain attached to the cap with a Chibi Bakugo hung on the end. Sue him.
“He’ll see you now, Shouto-san,” the receptionist states, pupil-less eyes blinking back at him. Shouto tucks the pen into his sleeve, feeling foolish and somewhat nervous. “Head on up to the office on the twelfth floor. He knows you’re on your way”.
Shouto clears his throat. “Thank you,” he says, weakness in his knees that has nothing to do with his nerves. The Ingenium handle pads cushion his palm as he braces onto his crutches, supporting him toward the nearby lift. There are eyes on his back as he goes. They’re heavy, lingering like physical touch. Something in him spoils at the unnecessary pity.
The lift remains mercifully empty. He presses the twelfth floor button and it glows green. The ride up is smooth, and quick. Double doors slide open onto a sprawling office space flooded with natural light. No one bothered to glance in Shouto’s direction as he gawked. If he remembered correctly this area was specifically for employees that worked closest to Bakugo. They’re all so nonplussed and focused. No nonsense. He likes that.
“Loser,” Bakugo grunts. He appeared from thin air, standing aside with arms crossed over his chest, eyeing Shouto’s stiff form with suspicion. “What the fuck are you doing here? You’re still on leave”.
Shouto makes a noncommittal noise, inwardly miffed. He straightens his posture and takes more of his own weight. “We haven’t seen each other in a while. Maybe I missed you,” he says. Bakugo’s expression suddenly soured, as though he swallowed a lemon, mouth thin against his teeth.
Amusing as it is, acknowledging the disconnect aloud makes him truly accept the distance he had put between himself and his friends; how he’d worked too hard, untied himself from the tangle of their lives and ended up isolated.
“Nori told me to say ‘hi’ by the way”.
Bakugo sweetens. “She like that cardboard house I sent you?”
“She already destroyed it,” Shouto admits. And Bakugo laughs, irritation split by a crooked grin.
“Atta girl,” he nods in approval, turning on his heel and starting toward a pair of towering doors. “Oi. You comin’? Or are you going to stand there all damn day?
Dynamite’s office is anything but corporate. Professional, yes, but it’s also so plainly personal in a way that screams Bakugo. A setup reconfigurable for days that he can’t sit still, a folding treadmill under his large mahogany desk to keep him moving. Bakugo works better on his feet, something Shouto knows well.
Built in shelves line the accent wall, filled with framed pictures of friends and family, newspaper clippings and awards. There are even fan creations—mostly from his debut era, when being favoured felt far more significant, but Shouto finds it sweet all the same.
Walking ahead of him, Shouto approaches the desk. Bakugo lingers for a beat to holler something out the door before returning to his desk.
Two consult chairs face the head office chair opposite. Lowering into one of them, Shouto props his crutch up and takes his phone out of his pocket. Ever hopeful, he unlocks it, opens Enigmail and refreshes the chat list. There are new messages from a few other people he added in the beginning, but nothing from you. He tries not to sigh too obviously.
“What’s got you all fuckin’ mopey?" Bakugo leaned over to look down at the phone. Shouto hastily locked it and the explosive hero narrowed his eyes at the impassive veil Shouto pulled over his face.
“Nothing. How did the first Herokind event go?” he asks, fiddling with his newly acquired Dynamite pen. “Midoriya always sugar coats things for me”.
“Went fine. You didn’t miss anything,” Bakugo waves off. The leather office chair creaks as he leans back. “Boring as all hell since it was just the kickstarter. Food mild enough for a toddler to eat and too much alcohol. The auction will be more interesting. That birdbrain partner of yours was hilarious, though”.
“Hawks?” Shouto’s mouth twitches, failing to conceal his mirth. “What did he do this time?”
“Spent the night antagonising your shitty old man,” Bakugo pauses for a brief moment and rescinds his words. “Or aggressively flirting. Can't tell the difference with him”.
Shouto keeps his thoughts to himself on that one.
“Ended with Endeavor triggering all the sprinklers at the after party though,” Bakugo ends, eyes crinkled under the weight of his wicked grin. Shouto pursed his lips tight. Amusement huffed through his nose. He imagines his father standing in the middle of the room, pathetically soaked through, wisps of smoke rising from his put-out embers, and he laughs.
Bakugo looks rather pleased by the reaction. But then his gaze flickers over Shouto’s shoulder and his brow arches expectantly. “Did’ya need something? I shouted for the Egghead because I thought you were on your break”.
Shouto’s laughter dwindles as he follows Bakugo’s line of sight. His breath catches. An employee stands in the doorway peeking around a tall box of paperwork. Wide eyed as they examine him.
Wrapped around their wrist is a familiar sliding knot bracelet.
“I just—uh…”
His head spins. There’s a smudge on your finger where your pen's ink leaked, just like in the photo. Could this be you? You are—
“What the hell has gotten into everybody today,” Bakugo tuts, pushing up from his desk and striding over to receive the box himself. Your shoulders slump when you are relieved of the weight. Bringing your hands to your chest and massaging the joints.
—still looking right at him. Cute. He cannot help but think how cute you are, tripping over your words, losing your footing.
“Oi, maestro,” Bakugo clicks his fingers in your face and startles you out of your stupor. “Get it together. I need you with a clear head when that sleepy bastard from the HPSC gets here”.
You glare at Bakugo, “Mera-san is the least of your problems, Dynamite. Worry about yourself and the six unanswered emails I forwarded to you from the claims manager”.
You’re beautiful. And your voice, it’s so—his lips part, and he tries to speak, to interrupt Bakugo’s incessant teasing, but words fail him.
“Whatever. Those insurance claims are bullshit and you know it,” Bakugo mutters. He turns and moves to shove the box of paperwork beside the desk. His mouth downturns into a smirk when he stands and notices your attention drawn to Shouto once again.
“Is that everything? I’d appreciate it if you stopped gawking,” Bakugo drawls, a dry rasp to his taunting that seems to embarrass you further. Shouto isn’t sure he’s breathing. You’re right there. You’re within reach and he’s rooted to his chair.
“You’re such a—! Y’know what, no, I’m leaving now,” replying harshly you start toward the open door where you come to an abrupt halt. Shouto feels the distance like the pull of a leash. You incline your head into a short bow, losing strength in your voice as you acknowledge him, “Have a good afternoon, Shouto-san”.
Then you’re gone. He stares after you dumbly. In all the years he has worked in the hero industry Shouto has never been more thankful for choosing to make his given name his brand than he is now.
Bakugou falls heavily in his chair and sighs.
Shouto swallows, “Who was—”
“Don’t,” Bakugo stresses the command, as though telling a dog to heel. Shouto can feel the heat behind his pointed glare. Undeterred, his eyes linger after you, stuck on the spot where you once stood, heart beating like a hummingbird’s wing.
“I mean it, Halfie. Run off the only competent PA I’ve ever had with your pisspoor flirting and I will kill you,” Bakugo barrels on. There’s no true malice but it comes through gritted teeth, like he has resigned himself to the impending stupidity. Because Shouto is already looking back at him with that small, impish curl to his lips.
“I’m not that terrible at flirting,” he says.
“Making eye contact for three uninterrupted minutes is not flirting,” Bakugo scoffs.
Shouto hums. “And what is? Pulling their pigtails for ten years?”
“Watch it,” Bakugo grouses, bottom lip jutting. He kicks the leg of Shouto’s chair and he laughs; he’s missed this.
Hoping to get back on track then, Shouto asks, “Will you be attending the charity auction, then?”
The other man grunts an affirmative. “I’ve put some memorabilia and shit up to be sold. Sparky somehow convinced Eijirou to auction himself off for a date,” Bakugo snorts and gives an amused shake of his head. “I’m willing to bet he’ll rake in at least ten million yen. Minimum”.
“Wouldn’t surprise me,” Shouto agrees. Kirishima had grown a lot since graduation all those years ago. Pair a stocky build with a big hearted guy like him and everyone is tripping over themselves to get a piece. “Is he nervous that he won’t make much?”
Bakugo clicks his teeth, interlocking his hands across his midsection and getting comfortable. “He really hasn’t got a fucking clue. The HPSC schmuck I’ve got to talk to today has already suggested extra security in case certain high profile guests get resentful,” he says. Crimson peeks through narrowed eyes, considering, calculating. “Are you gonna go? You’re looking steady enough”.
The last Bakugo had seen of him was directly after the incident—crumpled into the fetal postion and involuntarily spasming with six second intervals. Unable to speak, to walk, to turn his head. Worst case scenario presented on scene was that he could lose the ability to function at all, and Shouto had been thrown into a pit of depression so oppressive that he withdrew from himself all together.
There’s an underlying relief in Bakugo’s question that comforts him in ways he wasn't aware he’d been seeking. Pleased, Shouto drags his crutch between his thighs and twists at the padding around the handle. “I’ll be in attendance. I plan on bidding on a few things. David Shield’s original design sketches maybe,” he admits. “…Will ‘maestro’ be there?”
Bakugo seems to parse the response carefully, as if it cracked open a hole into Shouto’s psyche. “Izuku is shooting for those, you know. I’m the one that’s gotta deal with him cryin’ if he loses”.
“I know,” Shouto’s mouth splits in a wry, intentional smile. “If I’m not outbid then I’m happy to give him whatever I win”.
“Shill bidding? Ha. Izuku never believes me when I tell him you’re secretly a dick,” Bakugo smirks. A thought visibly crosses his mind. He props his elbow on the arm of his chair, chin resting in his palm and considering Shouto closely. “…My PA will be there for the auction. Working. So if you show me up—”
“I won’t,” Shouto interjects.
“—I will see you to the pearly gates myself,” Bakugo continues, unperturbed. There’s no true malice to his tone, moreso fond resignation, and Shouto’s chest bubbles with affection for his hard headed friend.
“That’s nice of you,” he says sincerely.
“Get fucked. You want an update on the cases we opened this week or did you seriously come here just to annoy me?”
“To annoy you, mostly,” Shouto ducks away from the hand that swiped at him. “Hawks forwarded me the arrest report. Tremor ended up going for a plea deal?”
“Yeah. Sold out the extras that helped him gather the hostages,” a forceful click of the keyboard; Bakugo slaps the spacebar to wake his monitor and makes clear his disapproval. “They went too fuckin’ easy on him,” he sneers. “Deserved a longer sentence”.
“As long as they’re off the streets,” Shouto muses. He isn’t one to hold a grudge against villains who’ve harmed him, but he can understand his friends' frustration. Had it been Bakugo or Midoriya, Shouto too wouldn’t be so quick to accept this outcome.
The gentle light flooding through the office windows recedes a fraction as a dense cloud covers the sun. His visit to the Blast Zone is but a blip of time, cut short by the foreboding ring from Bakugo’s emergency pager. He’s up and moving immediately, routine woven into him like muscle memory, and Shouto can’t help feeling jealous.
Under the door to his office, Bakugo clears his throat. He cocks his head toward the impending rain, “You need me to have someone drive you home?” And appears to regret it right away as Shouto smiles up at him, touched by the suggestion.
“No, thanks but I’ll be fine,” he waves off. Bakugo departs with a grunt, demanding he take an umbrella from the receptionist, because who doesn’t check the weather before they leave the house. The thud of his work boots reverberate off the walls as he disappears around a sharp corner, and Shouto shifts in the residual silence.
He takes out his phone as he pushes upright on his crutch; a habit rather than necessity. You haven’t messaged him since before your paths crossed—though you wouldn’t know that. He sighs. A niggling guilt has burrowed into his chest but it remains largely outweighed by his impatience.
Employees greet him on his short journey to the lift he arrived in. Bowing their heads, evoking his name with appreciation and awe while he’s scanning the space for signs of you. It’s a fruitless affair. Coming up short he steps inside, frown etched into his brow, and presses the ground floor button.
The speaker alerts him that the doors are about to close. He turns on his heel, leaning a hand on the support bar. Looking up from his shoes his eyes fall on your figure. You’ve stepped out from one of the closed off rooms, thumb tapping away at the phone in your hand. Shouto swallows, watching his own with trepidation.
Sensing a heavy gaze your eyes flicker to meet him at the last second, contact through the crack right as it shuts. He can hardly think. If this were a scene in Quirky Hearts he thinks he might just cast aside his dignity and sprint up the fire escape to confront you. The mere idea has heat simmering under his skin; it makes him want to fold himself into singularity. Shouto, a top five hero, a sword without ire.
Waiting dutifully, the receptionist hands him an umbrella from behind the staff desk. He squints at her name tag, muttering “Thank you, Akiyama-san” while he tucks the umbrella under his arm, deigning to mention the murky blueish blush that floods her skin, those pupil-less eyes shimmering. Shouto pulls his mask up over his nose, breath warming his cheeks, and takes a moment to observe the street.
Throngs of people scurry along the pavements to get away from the unforgiving chill. Raindrops can become a thousand paper cuts when the wind wills it. Afternoon starters amble into the lobby with wet shoulders. In his departure nobody so much as looks his way.
Sooba ▻ Hope you didn’t forget an umbrella today. Stay warm.
His thumb stopped mid-air, right above the “send” button. Sparing a lasting glance to the upper floors, Shouto quickly presses it, pockets his phone and opens up the umbrella. Stepping into the storm white noise fills his ears, tapping harshly on the PVC canopy over him.
Shouto tugs his jacket closer to his chest. The pavements are soaked, water fed into the uprooted cracks. He threads through the moving bodies back toward the station. With the streets overcast he feels better concealed.
A train is already waiting at the platform, decorated in yellow. The colour identifies it as a slow running train, taking the local stops route rather than the rapid one. He hides in his collar and stands in the corner of the carriage, umbrella collapsed and hooked over his wrist.
Six stops later—rather than three—and Shouto is closer to home. In the time it took to reach his street the rain had thinned out, now a sparse sun shower as the clouds pushed eastward.
Nori yells accusingly the very second his key slots into the door. He turns the lock and pushes it open, holding out his foot to keep her from rushing past. “I know, I know. I’m sorry sweet girl,” he scratched her head while bent to line up his shoes. “I missed you too. Bakugo said ‘hi’”.
She mewls and circles in place on her delicate paws, flicking her tail at him. Shouto takes it as forgiveness. “I think I met someone special today,” he recites to her, “The one I told you about…”
Stopping in the middle of his warm apartment, Shouto becomes unbearably aware of how damp his clothes are. He fishes his phone and wallet out from his pockets and sets them on the kitchen island before padding toward the bathroom.
A thorough rinse and long soak later, Shouto sprawls himself across his couch, phone laid on his chest and arm hung loosely over the edge while Nori plays with his fingers. She clings to his forearm as he cups her full belly, lazily dragging her back and forth across the floor.
He’s sipping on the mouth of his water bottle, mindlessly watching as Aki-or-something begs for Saeko-or-other to take him back after going on a date with another contestant, when your messages come through on Enigmail.
InsertNameHere ▻ Guess what happened today ▻ Saw Pro Hero Shouto at work. ▻ I think he might hate me? lol
Shouto inhales sharply, choking on his mouthful of water. Tears prickle behind his eyes as his diaphragm spasms, and he tries to catch his breath, fist thudding at his chest. Oscillating between mortification and delight—it really had been you.
Sooba ▻ Why would you think he hates you?
InsertNameHere ▻ I left an awful impression. And he looked at me like this (⊙_⊙’) the whole time.
Heat burns at his nape; embarrassment spilling over into every crevice of his body. The air around him distorts and he exhales, steam curling from his lips. Nori watches on from the floor in fascination, sparing no sympathy. Maybe Bakugo had a point.
Sooba ▻ Maybe that’s just his face.
InsertNameHere ▻ Maybe… ▻ It is a pretty face though. Prettier in person.
Shouto feels all the air deflate from his body. He sinks into the couch, head lolling against his shoulder as he turns to press a grin into the cushions, gripped by a sudden rush of endorphins. It had been you. You’re real. More importantly, you are attainable.
Now did he want to do anything about it?
Sooba ▻ You think so??
The typing dots bounce along the chat room border as you reply.
InsertNameHere ▻ I know so. I was there. Beautiful even when he is staring right through me ( ̄ロ ̄lll)
The memory of you speaking his name echoes like a broken record. He has yet to tire of it. Though he’s lightheaded and hazy, your features are still clear in his mind. The sure fire in your eyes, your sharp tongue and your pouty lips. A slow, warm tension trickles into his gut, swooping in anticipation and breathless longing as he imagines the face you might make if he touched you.
Sooba ▻ That’s presumptuous. He was staring at you. Why wouldn’t he be
InsertNameHere ▻ I. ▻ You’re so unfair you know that ▻ If you were here I would
His breathing picks up ever so slightly.
Sooba ▻ What would you do with me
InsertNameHere ▻ Are we veering into sexting territory right now
Sooba ▻ Unintentionally.
Shouto shifts his hips. The movement pulls his sweatpants tighter around his hips and a familiar tingling rushes below his waist. When was the last time he touched himself? He brings the phone to his forehead for a moment of clarity, peering up at the screen through his eyelashes.
InsertNameHere ▻ Is this the part where we come full circle and you actually send me a dick pic
He tucks his chin, a lazy smile playing on his lips. The gentle throb in his briefs pulses throughout his body and he answers, reaching to squeeze himself through the fabric, just for relief.
Nori sneezes. He falters, reminded of her presence and overcome by the urge to cover up. Proverbial tail between his legs, Shouto retreats to the privacy of his bedroom, shutting the door with a quiet click. Evening filters in through the windows, mauve and rosy. He kneels on the bed and it yields under his weight, frame silent while he crawls to the headboard and reclines back, phone in hand.
▻ Shit, sorry. I was joking you don’t have to do that if you don’t want to
The message goes over his head. He opens the front camera and stares back at his flushed, disheveled face before tilting the device, angling it toward his body.
Frosted fingertips trail up his stomach and it jumps, laying the hem of his shirt across his chest. Down again to the fine dark hair below his belly button, goosebumps rising across skin, blood rushing to the surface. Hooks his thumb suggestively into his waistband, hand splayed across his hip, and takes the photo.
Sooba ▻ [IMG_628] ▻ I want to
Shouto. Shouto. Shouto. Abuzz with salacious apprehension he wonders what would it sound like above him? Under him? Breath knocked from your lungs, whining through the motions. He traces the outline of his clock. Covers his eyes with the crook of his arm and releases a shuddered breath, hips rising into the heel of his hand. A hand too big to be yours. Sweatpants pushed halfway down his thighs he pictured it anyway—you laid on your side, at his side, loose fist stroking him root to weeping tip.
Shouto thumbs at the head, smearing precum over his sensitive frenulum. Panting heavier, he squeezes his cock and wonders, would you tease him? Lick into his mouth and tell him not to be quiet?
The phone in his hand buzzes. Anticipation grips his heart. He almost drops it on his face when he squints up to read the screen.
InsertNameHere ▻ Fuck. You’re so gorgeous ▻ I can’t concentrate
Sooba ▻ You like it?
InsertNameHere ▻ I’ll show you how much ▻ [IMG_447]
Heat races through him. You’re in a loose tank top, touching yourself over pale boyshorts. The dark straps have fallen around your shoulders in an almost demure manner, collar slipping forward to reveal the soft cleavage of your chest. You’ve mirrored his position, albeit a little higher, enough for your mouth to be in frame. Wet and rouge, if he thinks hard enough he can imagine he left them kiss bitten.
Sooba ▻ I want to touch you
He’s desperate to know what you like. The way you want to be touched, how you might yield under his wandering hands. Patterns dance behind his eyelids as he reaches to knead his pecs, pinching the pert nipple with a breathy moan. He smooths over his abdomen, corded muscle tensing beneath the added sensation, arousal coiling hot in his belly.
InsertNameHere ▻ Touch yourself for me instead, yeah? ▻ Gonna think about you too
“Fuck,” he chokes. Shouto loses his phone amongst the sheets. Feet planted flat to the mattress, his knees spread until the waistband protests. “Please. Please. I’m so close,” he whispers to the image in his mind. His pace stutters, feverish as he fucks his fist. Your lips brush soft along the column of his throat to feel him swallow. He turns into the pillow, mouth parted for heaving breath.
“That’s it Shouto. So beautiful for me,” you’ll murmur, so at home in the crook of his body. Amidst the desperation you’ll straddle his thigh, rhythm synchronized, chests rising. Your hand—his hand—slips further, fingers curled to press up behind his balls. He’s on fire. “Cum for me, baby. Let me see you cum”.
Shouto’s head tips back into the plush of his pillow, every muscle clenched. Pleasure rockets through him. His cock twitches in his grasp. He cums with a strung out moan, breaking into short, wet pants as he catches his breath.
Riding the gentle aftershocks, his arm falls heavily to the side and hits his bedsheets with a quiet thud. The smell of old petrichor blows into his room with the draft draws his attention to the darkened window. Streaks of gold sunlight peak between the buildings across the street where it settles under the horizon.
The stickiness between his fingers is difficult to ignore. Drying steadily on his chest. Reality returns to him slowly as he stares at his soiled hand. After cleaning himself up with the wipes in his bedside table, Shouto tugs up his sweatpants and rubs at the pink splotches leading up his throat. With clarity comes a vague haze of shame and he is loudly alone; something vibrates and he is anything but lonely. He lifts his head, rummaging through the sheets to find his phone.
InsertNameHere ▻ Want you to feel good ▻ You there baby? ▻ Sooba? ▻ Hm. That’s not the sexiest of names
Shouto laughed through his nose. Endeared by your awkward jump from flirting to nervously making up for a perceived misstep.
Sooba ▻ sorry can’t multitask ▻ shouldnt make fun of your house husbands name
Exiting his bedroom is uncomfortably close to a wall of shame. He drags his feet; gait unsteady for far nicer reasons than a near career ending injury. Nori has acquired his spot on the couch, retaining warmth in his absence. She observes him, all knowing.
InsertNameHere ▻ No capitalised letters? Punctuation? What have you done with my Sooba lol ▻ How are you feeling?
Sooba ▻ really good. sleepy
He wanders to the kitchen and dithers over his next message, leaning his forearms on the cool countertop. This fleeting, unintended conversation could change everything and that fact is starting to nag at him.
▻ what about you
InsertNameHere ▻ I feel really good. And sleepy <3
The implication is not lost on him. He chews his bottom lip, flustered at just how pleased that makes him.
The next burst of chat bubbles appear in an instant, one after another. Typed hastily as though to outrun your own apprehension.
▻ Can I ask you something?  ▻ Did you mean it when you said you’d come to the event with me? ▻ I have a plus one. I want to see you. But you don’t have to 
Shouto swallows. Tugged between elation and fear. You’ve become all he yearns for and you could be just that, his, yet he panics all the same. Heroism had consistently been his lacquered shield. An excuse for his self isolation that people had to begrudgingly accept. Working himself to the bone afforded the luxury of never having to dwell on it. 
Exhaustion aside he was content with the humdrum life he hid behind. Before you, Shouto rarely wanted for anything. He had his family, and good friends, and a job that felt rewarding; it didn’t seem worth it to lay himself bare and be dissected on the off chance that someone new might love him. 
Because hectic work and risks aside, he’s profoundly aware of the ghosts he has yet to conquer. That somewhere, there is something fundamentally different inside him that you might find disappointing. 
Unthinkingly, Shouto grapples with the courage in him existing on the fringes and replies in much the same way you had. 
Sooba ▻ I meant it. I want to see you too.  ▻ I’d like to go with you  ▻ Don’t worry about a plus one. I’ll meet you there 
InsertNameHere ▻ Wow, okay. That was easier than I thought. I’m so excited  ▻ And super nervous
As it turns out the impending date motivates Shouto like nothing before. Days pass without fault or interruption. The man-shaped dent in his couch rises without the constant weight. He sticks closely to the routine his physiotherapist drew up for him. Walks longer distances and soaks up the sun daily, to Tsutomu’s great delight. 
Too wrapped up in his own coalesced anxiety and elation, he realises he hadn’t found it remotely odd that you hadn’t questioned his ability to get into the auction. 
His train of thought is interrupted by a firm hand coming down on his shoulder. “Man of the hour!” A familiar sharp toothed grin blocks his vision. Shouto clenches under the sudden weight to keep himself upright as Kirishima gives him a shake, “We missed you around here. You’re looking good!”
The charity event is in full swing. An anticipatory lull permeates the atmosphere as the chosen guests, heroes and civilians alike, wait for the auction to finally begin. Shouto arrived fashionably late, as Mina called it, after spending nearly three hours on a group call with her, Yaoyorozu, and his sister. 
The applause upon his entry had not been expected. His palms are still clammy. 
Compared to Shouto's charcoal three piece suit, tailored to precision, Kirishima dons a charmingly loud burgundy blazer over a dark turtleneck, pulled together by a simple chain. The material is tight across his broad shoulders. “Thank you, Kirishima,” Shouto smiles. He looks him over, “You look good too”. 
That signature grin grows weary. “You really think so?” Kirishima lowers his voice into a hush, tugging at the loose hair framing his face. “I wasn’t so sure about tying my hair back. What if nobody bids for me? I’m dying inside just thinking about it”. 
Shouto turns away from the sea of vibrant clothing and chatter to pat his friend on the arm and level him with a serious look. “A lot of people are going to spend money on you tonight, Kirishima. But in the impossible event that they don’t I’ll bid on you myself,” he tells him. “We can go to Mythoscape and try that new rollercoaster”. 
“Bro…” Kirishima’s eyes are wide and glassy. While Shouto expects the firm hug, he is mildly surprised by the long, dramatic kiss to his cheek. His breath smells faintly of white wine. “You’re the best,” he continues as he sets Shouto back on his feet. “But is it really okay for you to do that?”
A flash goes off. Shouto frowns. He scans the crowd and rubs away the wet mark left behind. Yaoyorozu catches his attention with a delicate wave from her place beside Kendo and Uraraka. “Why wouldn’t it be?” he asks, smiling back, yet distracted. You’re still nowhere to be found. 
“Well,” Kirishima draws breath through his teeth. “Bakugo kinda told me about your crush on his PA,” whatever he sees pass over Shouto’s expression has him sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck and scrambling to explain. “Nothing bad, man! You know he actually seemed pretty approving of it, in his own way”. 
The evermoving mass of bodies sharpens around a few other familiar faces. Midoriya is excitedly gesticulating as he rambles to a visibly overwhelmed HSPC shareholder. Bakugo watches the interaction with no intention of concealing his amusement. 
“I’m not sure about that,” Shouto rasps, narrowing his eyes at the man in question, like the pressure behind it might be enough to elicit his attention. Bakugo of all the people here would know where you are. The phone snug in his inside blazer pocket remains silent. A pout works its way onto his lips before he can stop it. “He said I’m bad at flirting”. 
Kirishima stifles a laugh and clears his throat when Shouto directs the petulant glare to him. “You are a little bad at it. But only when you’re actually trying! And even then that’s part of what makes it charming, y’know?”
“No, I don’t know”. 
“You’re the type to flirt without realising you’re doing it—or atleast people think you are, because you’re handsome and attentive and whatnot. But when you try it’s kinda obvious and bro, please stop looking at me like that,” Kirishima explains clumsily, tone pitching higher the longer he talks. 
Shouto’s lips thin as he tries to suppress a smirk. He rights himself as Kirishima nudges his side, catching a smile of his own, “What I meant is you have a chance. And Bakubro thinks so too. He wants you to be happy”. 
The sentiment warms him from the inside out. But it also makes apparent something trepid and cold in his gut. Regardless of his friends unfettered support there remains the real possibility that he will be rejected. That you will be disappointed or scared away by his status. That you could do as you please with the intimate parts of his life ‘Sooba’ gave you.
Scarier is the hope that you won’t.
“I’m going to get a drink,” Shouto announces, noticing Endeavor prowling around in his peripheral vision. Kirishima’s brow furrows, mouth parted in confusion, no doubt seeking to reassure him. “I’m okay, Kirishima. I just need something to do with my hands”. 
“Alright,” the taller man murmurs. Shouto finds himself at the end of a gentle smile once more. “Make sure to say ‘hi’ to Denks if you see him. He misses you too”.
“I will,” Shouto nods, ducking away from the inexpressible tenderness that has clung to him since stepping into the hall. People part to allow him through. His left leg has already begun to feel weak, not enough to worry but enough to notice, and he hopes he can later blame his gait on the alcohol. 
He reaches the bar and wrinkles his nose at the thick amalgamation of perfume, body odour and over-applied cologne. The bartender slides up to him. “Umeshu, please,” he says. “On the rocks”. 
Another body settles beside him. He shifts to accommodate them but doesn’t look; too distracted as he inhales deeply through his nose and exhales long out his mouth to allay his beating heart. Pulling his phone out from his inside pocket, the screen lights up and he finds it void of messages. 
After the… sexting, things had been fine. Better in a lot of ways. You both felt emboldened to truly act on your feelings. Sharing more pictures, secrets—though never your names—and laughter.  It is disconcerting that you would now go silent. 
The bartender sets his drink down and Shouto quietly gives his thanks, bringing it to his face, briefly caught in the soft glimmer, cubed ice submerged in liquid gold, tasting the sweet aroma at the back of his throat. He tips it back and drinks. 
As the glass hits the surface once more, the person next to him softly asks, “Are you waiting on anyone?” 
And his mouth goes dry. 
You’re bracing on crossed arms, watching him closely. Speckled in the warm low light reflected on the bar, you are more beautiful than he remembers, and just as nervous. There’s an air of uncertainty about you that shifts as your eyes meet, faint but palpable, encouraged by what he can imagine is the wonder on his own face. 
Shouto wets his lips. The plum taste lingers on his tongue. “…I might be,” he murmurs. You brighten at his reciprocation, a more charged kind of nervous—the kind that swoops low in your belly right before you take a leap. 
“If I’m wrong don’t laugh and don’t tell Dynamite,” you turn to face him and smooth your hands over your hips. This allows him a better look at your attire. Silken fabrics that form gentle lines around the waist, loose but elegantly so, not in a way that the clothes wear you. 
Your eyes dipped low, averted to avoid his stare. He cannot seem to direct it anywhere else. The auction has fallen away in its entirety. As far as Shouto is concerned there’s only you. 
“It’s me. And you’re…Sooba?” 
The tremble in your voice shrikes through him and it occurs to Shouto that you have always been the brave one.
He leans into your space, enjoying the way you quickly draw breath at his proximity, forced to meet his gaze. Rather than something remotely suave or cool, he dumbly asks, “You knew?”
Part of him wants to tuck his shoulders to his ears as you begin to laugh. They’re warm, undoubtedly red. Amusement is not at all what he prepared for. He thought this might all end up in his scrapbook memory, to be taken out and pined over now and then. 
“Shouto-san with all due respect, you came to my workplace with your very recognisable crutches and stared at me like a deer in headlights”. 
“Shouto,” he says. 
Your laughter simmers, “Hm?”
“Just call me Shouto,” he tells you, equal parts relieved and embarrassed. 
“Shouto,” you smile at him with a fondness that derails his thoughts. He has the vague urge to whine when it wanes. “I’m—I really am sorry I didn’t tell you. I swear I didn’t know until after you visited the agency. It all made sense after I looked up your socials and saw some old pictures of Nori”. 
“It’s alright. I knew and didn’t say anything either,” Shouto inclines his head, abashed. Then with a sudden sharp sort of clarity, he continues, “So then you knew, when you asked for a dick—?”
Words evade him under the warm press of your hand as you quickly cover his mouth. You glance around the room, closer than before, and you don’t seem to realise. Cautious, he touches your waist; he puckers his lips to kiss your palm; he feels your stomach jump under the silky fabrics. 
Your eyes darken, swallowed by pupil. “You’re a menace,” you simper, and reluctantly pull away. “Maybe we should talk about this somewhere with less…cameras”. 
Umeshu abandoned, Shouto wraps an arm around your lower back and allows you to direct him through the crowd. You weave through the moving bodies like thread through a needle, at one point reaching behind to take his wrist, becoming his tether.
Bakugo meets his gaze from across the room. His eyes flit to you, widening in surprise. Shouto flashes a boyish grin before disappearing through the side door. 
The door you choose next opens to a private bathroom. Shouto surges forward, taking you by the hips and crowding you against the bathroom counter, overcome by the need to feel everything that you are pressing into everything that is him.
He kicks the door behind him and settles in the clutch of your thighs as you scramble to balance on the marble edge. Your hands slide over his shoulders, splaying over each cheek. You’re both breathing heavily despite having done nothing at all.
“I said talk,” you remind him with a tremulous smile. Shouto knows you’re being playful. He apologises anyway; rests his head in the crook of your neck, letting the moment simmer, and you comb through his hair with your fingers. A shiver rolls down his spine. 
“Did you know it was me? Before you came to the agency, I mean”. 
He reclines from his crook to look at you. Eye level, silhouetted by the cheap bathroom luminescence. “When I saw you in there—and put it together I was so scared,” you continued. 
“Scared?” he echoed with a frown, knuckles brushing your cheek. 
“Not like that. I was scared of what you might think,” you turn into his caress and his pinched expression falls away. He can’t stop touching you and he can’t bring himself to be sorry about it. “I mean, I looked terrible that day, and you appeared out of nowhere and I wasn’t mad it was you. I was just…”
You swallow thickly, emotion swelling in your eyes. They’re crinkled at the corners. “You’re so big and bright. I didn’t want you to be disappointed”.
You were unaware of it—the profound cord you struck within him. How even in anonymity, your incorporeal fingers always seemed to find it. Even now, as you echo his own fears. 
“Momo first mentioned you might work for Bakugo. I didn’t know before I saw you that day. I still wasn’t certain until tonight”. You peer at him through your lashes then, listening intently. He brings your foreheads together and tells you, “There is no way you could’ve disappointed me”. 
“Oh? I could’ve been a villain”.
“My oldest brother was a villain,” he monotoned, wandering hands squeezing intermittently at your waist as though to make sure you’re still there. “My capacity for love and forgiveness knows no bounds”. 
You snort. The sound is abrupt and the force knocks your skulls together. “Oh—ow,” he grins, insides melting. Together you dissolve into a warm fit of laughter. 
“Hey, Shouto?” 
He hums in acknowledgment, eyes fluttering as your thumb swipes over the red mark below his hairline. “I like you,” you murmur. “I like you so much it’s stupid”.  
Plunged into an ice cold realisation, Shouto freezes to process your words. “You—like me?” 
“Yeah?” you said it like he was dense, like it was clear all along. “I can’t help it when you’re so…yourself”
And isn’t that all he’s ever wanted? To be loved without pretense, without a winner. To be special to someone for no special reason. 
“Oh,” he breathes. “Me too. I like you. I want—” his fingers flex at your hips, grounding. He blinks. “I don’t know your name yet”. 
Affection colours your features. Shouto likes you best like this—sure of yourself, of his feelings for you. You recite your name. He repeats it endlessly in his mind and rolls it around his teeth. He calls to you even when you’re right in front of him. 
“Can I kiss you now?” 
“You were waiting?” you laugh, tucking his hair behind his ear. It’s such a novel thing but it makes something monumental swell in his chest. “Kiss me. I want you to”. 
Given permission, Shouto traces the curve of your jaw with a bold shyness, from the sensitive skin below your ear to your chin. His finger hooks beneath. You’re lovely. He thinks he could spend an hour describing your demure half smile, how your lips yield under the light pressure of his thumb; your tongue darting out reflexively. 
He shakes at the desire that fills him. He’s not used to it—this wanting. It feels like a thousand insatiable butterflies in his chest. Dipping into your magnetism, his heart beat faster and faster with the simple brush of your lips. He kissed you, innocent and honest, and then he kissed you again, licking the seam of your mouth, arms coiling around your middle as you cling to him. 
You tip forward. Your thighs clench at his waist and drag him impossibly close. It brings you chest to chest. He tries to hold you steadfast as your hand wraps around his nape, softly scratching his scalp; he feels you smile against his lips when he shudders. 
You break for air. Arousal shoots through him at your half moan, the sound tapering into a happy hum the instant his lips trail down your neck, tasting your pulse before making his way down to your exposed collar. He peppers kiss after kiss on every swathe of skin he can reach, sinking teeth into every little reaction you give him. 
Big hands at your lower back arch your body into his. You yield, tension sapped from your limbs, grappling his shoulders to keep yourself from falling while you grind down on his lap. Shouto groans, grip slipping lower to cup your ass. 
“We’re getting carried away,” you gasp between kisses. That alone was obvious. His cock strains uselessly in his suit pants. But the light glints tantalisingly along your mouth, swollen and wet with saliva. Shouto kisses you again so you won’t have to tell him to attend to his responsibilities. 
A warm breath scores his cheek as you huff through your nose, nipping firmly at his lower lip. “I mean it. I am technically still at work,” you try again, voice lacking strength. “Dynamite will knock on every door in this building—don’t wrinkle your nose, you know I’m right”.
“Alright. I know,” he rasps, barely an exhale. It takes all his willpower to pull away. He steadies you on your feet, smoothing out the creases in your formal attire while you are quite pleased to simply watch on as he adjusts himself in his pants. “I’m glad my suffering is funny to you”. 
“Don’t be dramatic,” you murmur, pecking the corner of his mouth. “I'll hide with you in the corner like I promised I would. We can make up for lost time after the auction. You know. The one for charity”. 
Shouto hums and reaches for the door, knowing you’ve won. “Oh. I told Kirishima I’d bid for his date night,” he recalls as he turns the handle. “Would that bother you?” 
“Of course not baby,” you reply and take one last look at your reflection, less disheveled than before. The endearment ‘baby’ almost has him walking into the doorframe.
You straighten up. Shouto thinks he must look incredibly dumbstruck, if your concerned expression is any indication. “You okay?” you ask, proffering your hand. “You didn’t bring your crutches tonight, did you?”
“Don’t worry. I’m fine,” he intertwines your fingers, dizzy as you squeeze around him. 
“It’s just a tremor”. 
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puranami · 7 months
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✿ It's The Little Things - 4 ✿
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A/N: I wish I knew how to write for Katakuri because he'd be right at home in this big boi edition ksdjh Rosi makes me cry ilhsm (ಥ﹏ಥ)
Summary: Little relationship things with a couple big bads, and Rosi who has never done anything wrong in his life and doesn't die, bc i said so ✿
Characters: Crocodile, Rosinante (Corazon), Doflamingo
Content: SFW, G/N reader (though Croc calls you doll... but I think he'd do that regardless,) fluff on toast ✿
(Part 1 - Luffy, Zoro, Nami, Usopp, Sanji) (Part 2 - Buggy, Shanks, Mihawk) (Part 3 - Franky, Robin, Law, Kid, Killer)
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Crocodile
✿ It goes without saying, being with Crocodile means you are surrounded by luxury; he is a very materialistic man with a very specific image he has cultivated, and that extends to you. All your clothes, jewellery, any makeup, even down to your perfume and shampoo are carefully considered to make sure you compliment him perfectly. He is particular, but not unreasonable, giving you options so you can make your own decision, and he will not force something on you that you hate - can't have you walking around sulking. Really though, he values your opinion, he just sets the parameters and you chose how to meet them. In fact, if you simply went along with everything he said, giving no input of your own; he'd get very bored, very quickly.
✿ When you aren't in public, basically acting as the power couple of Alabasta (before that goes awry,) and then of the Cross Guild; he allows himself to be much softer, and generally just more human with you. Work will always be his priority, but he's not against sleeping in and having a lazy day, or part day, depending on what's going on in your lives. He'll hug you randomly, catch you in his hook if he wants your attention, and just generally manhandle you, but in the gentlest way. Crocodile also enjoys cooking with you, and is not above throwing ingredients, or flicking water at you, especially if you start it, and he will throw a tea towel in your face if he wants to. It's very endearing seeing such a powerful, and feared man being a little silly, and it's only for you.
✿ His sense of humour is as dry as he is, and either you get it and laugh along, which is nice, or you find it so painful that you can't help but groan, him laughing at your suffering instead, which is even nicer. Crocodile's laugh is basically a low rumble that you can feel reverberating in his chest, which is the nicest part of all. He always drops jokes unexpectedly, in a way where you think he's just going to comment on something, or maybe flirt with you; "You know what makes me smile, doll?" - "Could it be the fact you get to spend a quiet, relaxing day with me, hmm?" - "Facial muscles." It's either the funniest thing, or you will genuinely want to throttle him. He doesn't hold it against you if you slap him over it, the impact barely registers with this living sandbag, and he takes it as a sign that the joke was a particularly good one (in his opinion.)
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Rosinante (Corazon)
✿ An absolute sweetheart, and a gentle giant. He treats you like spun glass, at least to begin with, afraid he will hurt you with either his general size and strength, or his clumsy nature. It will take time for him to relax into things, but he will; humans are naturally rather resilient, and him giving you a strong hug, or falling over himself onto you is not going to break you. It still won't stop him crying over it, especially if you end up with any bruises, but you'll hold him gently as you stroke his head, soothing him while you explain that it's alright, and that these things happen; "I got a bigger bruise from accidentally kneeing the table the other day. It's not the first time, and it won't be the last either. Everything is okay, I promise." Poor guy just loves you so much, he can't stand the thought of you being hurt in any way!
✿ He absolutely adores it when you snuggle up beside him, under his massive coat. It feels like the safest place in the world, and it's so warm - nothing bad can happen under this fortress of feathers! Rosi in general is just a cuddly guy really, holding you at every opportunity, taking your relatively small hands in his giant ones, carrying you whenever and wherever you'll allow him to; always by his chest though, so when he inevitably slips, he doesn't land on you. Being your resident tall, he prefers to pick you up to reach things as opposed to grabbing those things for you, as it means he can hug you at the same time!
✿ Rosinante is absolutely ride or die with you! Whatever your dreams and ambitions, he will do everything in his power to try and help you achieve them. The only caveat is that he will also do the same for his own mission, and sometimes that overtakes him, and he will unknowingly, and definitely unwillingly overlook you at times. He keeps you completely separate from that part of his life - because it's so dangerous, and he never wants to put you in harms way. It can be lonely when he's so focused, or not around, and that's what spurs him to attach himself to you whenever he can.
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Doflamingo
✿ The fact you managed to catch his attention at all is honestly a feat in itself. He's a man who has everything (until he goes to jail,) and he always gets what he wants, no matter how he has to go about it - so there must be something that he cannot buy, threaten, or manipulate out of you, or anyone else. There is something about you personally, a fearless spirit, the right kind of sass, the patient and forgiving nature of a god, just something more; you're like a unique treasure, one that he refuses to allow in the public eye, as he is a very selfish man. He basically puts you on a pedestal, catering to every little whim or desire. At least to a point. He won't prioritise you over his machinations, and he can't be soft and tender with you on command. He'll have is moments sure, but they're on his time, and only when you are alone.
✿ He loves to loom over you, manhandle you, generally just manipulate your body, all to remind you just how small and delicate you are. The man is a predator, let's be real, and you will never forget that while you are his favourite, you are still prey in his eyes. While he likes the look of you being the small, timid thing he expects from prey, he adores your looks of defiance, refusing to cower before him. It's part of what proves that you are above everyone else, excluding himself of course, and that you are worthy of his attention. You can sass him, and tell him "No," so long as you do what he says where it matters. He won't tolerate blatant disrespect and insubordination, that's a one way ticket 6ft under. Your relationship is a delicate balance of accepting your place beneath him, but not being so beneath him that you may as well not exist.
✿ In those longed for times when it's just the two of you, he will give you whatever affection you desire, even if it's not something he can really reciprocate. He likes you happy, and his pride means he will not accept that there is something he cannot get or do for you. That's not to say he doesn't love you, he does in his own way; he's just buried that part of him deep down, so deep it may never be found. Perhaps, as time goes on however, with you being a consistent presence in his life, showing him what genuine kindness and compassion are, he may remember somewhat and be able to offer it back to you. Don't hold your breath, though, if it's happening, it's not happening fast. He's certainly a convincing actor, and his mimicked affections feel real enough.
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deformedcat · 2 months
Text
The 5 love language
pairing: artist male y/n x childhood friend oc
warning: vomiting, stalking, obsessive behaviour, gore, open ending, not proof read, v rushed 📣📣
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Valentine's Day, a day to spend with your loved ones, something you didn't have.
Forget spending Valentine's day with anyone- you had work at the convenience store. Sure, you're an artist, but money won't magically appear onto your kitchen counter.
Despite that, it didn't bother you as much as the sight you saw around you that day. (though bother might not be fitting, more like envious) There were couples everywhere on dates, holding hand and showing their affection towards each other. Bleh. (translation: when is it my turn?)
Either way, you could complain all you want but life still goes on. Sighing, you walk towards your apartment, staring down at your phone to avoid the sights of couples. It wasn't until an envelope at your door caught your attention.
The envelope had a simple yet design with a heart shape sticker on it, you hesitantly take it and enter your apartment.
After sitting on your couch for abit, you cautiously and gradually opens the letter, wary of any potential pranks, but nothing happened.
"Dear y/n
Happy Valentine's day, well, it's not Valentine's day yet but it will be soon.
I've always had a big crush on you, but i never gotten the chance to confess to you directly. Truth to be told, i'm not a courageous person, but you give me the strength to do so today :).
You are the most strongest, admirable person I've met. Whenever i listen to your music, I'm hit in awe with how talented you are. I fall even harder everytime i see you. Your presence is already enough for me to keep going.
Do you know the saying "the 5 love language"? They are words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch. I would love to know which one is your love language, but instead of asking, I want to let you experience all of them. I aim to make you feel loved in every way possible, starting with words of affirmation!"
..Ah.
A secret admirer,,?
You honestly didn't know something so cliche that would be done in a high school romance movie would happened to yourself, in real life.
The rest of the kettle had you fuming like a kettle, was this person a fan of poets? They sure had their way with words.
As sweet as the letter sounds, you couldnt help but feel crept out by this, how much does this person knows you? Do you even know this person?
You could only hope that it's not someone creepy, like a stalker.. You opened your phone and take a picture of the letter, sending it to your childhood bestfriend.
y/n:
photo.jpeg
hyeon:
?
what's this?
y/n:
love letter,
saw it in front of my
apartment
hyeon:
does someone have a lil crush on little y/n :0?
y/n:
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hyeon:
Daniel's got a competitor 😄
y/n:
NEVER
im forever loyal to daniel
👎👎
hyeon:
haha
why are you showing me this?
y/n:
idk
felt a lil crept out
dont u think its weird??
how did they know where i lived? idfk who they are
hyeon:
hmm, thats true.
maybe it's a neighbour? they mentioned they could hear your music, they might be living around your area ?
y/n:
that make it even worse
hyeon:
lock your doors and windows, you wouldnt want to entice your little 'admirer' to break in do you?
y/n:
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gtg, bye
hyeon:
i was just joking D:!
I'll be back from Russia soon, i promise <3
y/n
mm, maybe dont.
take care tho
A few days went by and nothing happened, you were beginning to wonder if the letter was just a prank from the kids around the area.
Regardless, you didn't care, you were to tired from your work ealier. Getting yelled at by your manager in front of the customers, for something rather silly. (you looked really tired but manager took it as "mf u dont like ur work isit) This was far fron the first time, and not the worst thing that had happened, but it didn't make it less draining.
you went into your apartment, turned on the light and fell right onto your couch. Rent was due in 3 weeks,, you were mentally preparing yourself to starve for the next few days to be able to have a roof under your head.
everything was tiring you out, and you just want a car to come running into you already, but the house isn't going to clean itself. You had to do chores because you have been putting off chores for a few days now. It's going to pile up the more you tell yourself "i'll do it tomorrow." so you pushes your body off the couch to start.
maybe you can start by taking out the trash.
problem was, the trash was missing. you stared at the empty, new plastic bag over the trash you didn't remember replacing. are you hallucinating?
you went over the sink to wash the dishes, to find them cleaned and kept neatly inside the cabinet. huh.
you must be going crazy, you were sure you did not wash those dishes nor keep them. even if you did, you wouldn't store them as neat as this.
are you going insane?
you quickly check the laundry, and sure enough, they were all done up. the dirty clothes were washed, the one that you didn't bother folding was folded and put away in your bedroom. Neatly.
was your landlord here this morning? Even if he was, he wouls never done something like this. He only ever told you to stop being so lazy and clean the messy apartment. He even once demanded you to clean everything up while be watched but thats it.
you hit your head against the wall, hard, to check if you had not actually fallen asleep on the couch and this was all just a dream. you winced at the pain on your forehead, that sure gave you an answer that youre not hallucinating.
maybe you're just overworked..?
you sat on your bed, noticing a familiar envelope with another sticker on your pillow.
what the fuck.
you opened the envelope, which in it read,
"dear y/n,
Surprise, it's an act of service this time! you're so hardworking that you tire yourself out,, so i decided to do somethinf to lighten the load for you. Remember to take a break when you need it okay?
I also cooked dinner for you, it's your favourite :). They're in the fridge, please enjoy, it's not healthy to starve yourself.
Eternally yours,
Your secret admirer 💌"
you wanted to kill yourself.
your stalker is in fact, a stalker.
how did they get in your house?
how did they know your habits?
you didn't even bother eating the food in the fridge, letting it sit there as you spend the night searching for cameras in your house.
y/n:
hyeon,
they broke in
the mf that sent the letter broke in
photo.jpeg
hyeon:
broke in?
how? didn't i told you to lock the doors and windows?
y/n:
idfk hyeon
they broke in and like
did my chores
and even cook dinner for me
saying its an act of service
hyeon:
are you safe?
y/n:
i dont know am i
i know this sounds weird af but im
not joking
i dont feel safe in my house rn
hyeon:
call the police.
y/n:
with what evidence
tell them that someone sent two envelope, broke into my bouse, did my chores and cooked a meal for me??
ill sound like a maniac
then they'll send me to a mental hospital
hyeon:
you'll never know unless you try,
y/n, this sound dangerous, your life could be on the line bere.
please just call the police and see if they can do anything about it.
do you still have that previous letter with you?
y/n:
yeah
hyeon:
show that to them, including the new one.
y/n:
ok
ill try
hyeon:
okay.
i wish i wasnt in russia right now.
im so sorry, please wait a bit more, ill come back soon.
update me whenever you can.
y/n:
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dont be sorry,
thank you.
you never had a peaceful sleep for the next few days, the only thing keeping you sane is messaging hyeon everyday.
you have been so worn out from what happened that night. you had gone to the police, but after they didnt found anything suspicious in your house besides the two letter, they then left and told you to contact them if anything happened.
useless. you texted to hyeon.
neither did the police nor you could find any hidden cameras around your house, but that didnt mean you were safe. they could missed them, or not search at the right place.
you were sitting on your couch, scrolling down your phone to distract what had happened. suddenly, someone knocked on your door.
you groaned, thinking it was your landlord, you got up, walked to your door and peek from the peephole. nobody was there.
you opened the door slowly, immediately notices the stench behind the door. sitting on the floor in the dark hallway were two boxes wrapped like gifts with a gold ribbon.
crimson liquid was seeping through the boxes, on top of one of the box was an envelope, the one you had received a few days prior.
you suppressed the urge to throw up as you felt your breath getting quicker and shallower. you opened your phone and called the police and messaged hyeon
y/n
hyeon
when the polices arrived, they opened the boxes and envelope. one of the polices seems panickes and quickly rushes to you bringing the envelope, making you read it.
"Dear y/n,
Two, the number of hands one would need to do a heart, i thought it would be romantic to give you two gifts. After all, what's Valentine's day without gifts?
I've seen the way those two treated you, i couldnt stand watching them mistreated you. How prideful that human trash must be to push all his mistakes onto you then punishes you? Just because he's a manager? You don't deserve that, dear, so, this is for you.
And that bastard landlord of yours, the way he stares at you and put his hand at you is so disgusting. If he's gonna look at you like that, he don't deserve his eyes. Just because he's your landlord, does not mean he can put his hand on you like that, so i cut them off.
i hope you enjoy the gifts, dear. I guess this can be considered to be acts of service too? I look foward to spending some quality time with you. I can't wait to finally have you in my arm.
ps. inside the hand of your manager is a necklace. <3
Eternally yours,
Your secret admirer 💌"
you glanced at the content of the boxes, puking at the side after seeing the blood hand of your manager and your landlord's head with his eyes gouge out.
you felt helpless.
you had nowhere to go.
you didnt wanna stay here anymore, you dont feel safe anywhere.
you just want to die.
as the police patting your backs and gives you a bottle of water, you receives a text message on his phone.
hyeon:
hey, i'm here now.
i'm sorry i couldn't reply to you earlier, i just arrived in south korea.
y/n:
hyeon thank god
please
can i stay at your place for a while
i cant stay here anymore
hyeon:
Of course, i'll pick you up.
when you finally met hyeon, you collapsed into the taller man's arm, letting the tears out you have been holding in as hyeon holds you close, embracing you in much needed warmth and comfort.
"here," hyeon placed down a plate of fried rice in front of you, coincidentally it being your favourite food but you dont have any appetite after what happened.
"i can tell you havent been eating well, it's all i have at the moment, but its better than nothing."
you appreciated him, but didnt wanna eat anything at the moment, the sight of your landlors was still fresh in your mind.
"thanks, but i feel really sick right now." you felt bad for putting hyeon through the trouble, only to turn it down in the end. "i'll heat it up and have it tomorrow."
"maybe you at least drink some water?"
"sure." Hyeon was already pouring a warm cup of water for you, you were glad you at least had hyeon to come to.
you two spent a while in an awkward silence, it was like hyeon would not ask what had happened until you were ready to talk about it yourself.
"do you have work later?" you asked to distract yourself.
No, hyeon had alarms around the house. He would be notified of any suspicious activities detected.
"no, my manager said he'll take care of it."
"oh.."
then the silence were back again, until hyeon opened his mouth.
"are you going to sleep now?"
"I.." you were sure you would not be able to sleep tonight, you do not know where that stalker was, what if they too breaks into hyeon's house? will you put him in danger as well?
Even so, you're still on edge.
"do you want to share a room?"
"what?"
"you don't have to sleep alone when i'm right here for you to cuddle with!"
you sighed, "hyeon-"
"no really, maybe im just overprotective but i really dont want to leave you alone. We can catch up on the past month, and maybe if i talk enough, it might put you to sleep?"
you cried into his arms for the second time that night.
you could not remember the last time you was help to sleep, you didnt think there was ever a time actually. when he slept besides hyeon, the latter would always wrap his body around you like a koala.
not that it surprised you, hyeon had always been handsy with you ever since the two was young, but only around him.
whenever they ate together, hyeon would reach his hand out to wipe a grain of rice or a drop of sauce off your face.
whenever they play fight, hyeon would always hug you as a way to "immobilize you". when hyeon suggested decorating the house for Valentine's day to take your mind off of things, he would hold your hand and guide you through tying ribbons and hanging decorations.
And when you still couldnt stop the anxiety from rising, hyeon would hold you so close, no matter what time it is, he would remind you to breathe, and prepare plastic bags for you in case you pukes.
Heck, he even made sure that you had fallen asleep first before he would.
you felt safe by hyeon's side.
On the morning of Valentine's day, hyeon was still asleep which was expected, he had waited for you to fall asleep the night before.
You carefully and quietly slipped out of hyeon's tight hold, and headed towards the washroom, you decided to clean hyeon's office then cook a meal for him.
walking toward hyeon's office, you noticed a few paperwork on his table. It seems like it was the paperwork hyeon's had been doing last evening.
His handwriting was exceptionally neat, it had been quite some time you last seen it, but you could remember envying the man for having such a neat writing.
you noticed a half opened file on the floor, you picked it up and read the content of the files out of curiousity
they were mostly a bunch of statistics and numbers, percentages and whatnot. you wanted to stop reading but you felt drawn in his handwriting. To you, it looked familiar, like you've seen it before.
you stared longer at the words until you realized,
realized why he found it familiar.
you flipped to the next page, why did hyeon have your landlord personal informations?
you felt arms hugging you from behind, "what are you doing, snooping around my work like that? what if it's confidential?'
you didnt answer.
"y/n?" hyeon seemed to noticed you tensing up, "sorry, did i scare you that badly? you just seemed so focused on those papers, i just had to-"
"Hyeon."
"Yeah?"
You didnt know what to say, you did not know what to ask. You didnt know how to ask him.
you wish you were just dreaming.
Because.. wasnt hyeon in russia all this time?
"y/n?"
Hyeon couldnt have been in south korea. He couldnt have went into your apartment. He couldnt have place those.. letters abd boxes in your apartment if he wasnt even in the same country as you
ah.
"y/n, are you okay?"
"hyein,, can i take a look at your passport?"
"my passport? why?"
"i just want to.. confirm something."
Hyeon looked at you for a while, before letting go of you "sure, let me go get it."
As he went back to his room, you held ontobthe table tightly to avoid collapsing.
its okay.
you just had to look into his passport, then you would realize how dumb you are to suspect hyeon, the person that sheltered you when you had nowhere to go. the man that's your childhood friend who would sacrifice anything for you-
Hyeon returned, with his passport in hand. "here you go." you were about to take the passport from hum until you saw it
or more like the lack of it.
instead of handing the passport to you normally, hyeon had flipped it to the latest page. Hyeon had supposedly flew to russia first of december last year.
The last time he travelled, according to the passport,
was back in june.
"you were wondering about this, werent you?" hyeon stepped closer towards you, "when did it click?"
"your handwriting you bastard."
"ah right, that was my mistake, but dont you think it took too long for you to notice?"
Hyeon took the papers one by one, putting them together neatly, as if he was having the most normal and mundane conversation.
As if he wasnt the one that sent you all of that letters.
As if he was not the one who broke into your apartment.
As if he didnt sent that severed head and hands to you..
"i guess i should expected that, after all, i'm never the one whom you'll ever have eyes for, am i?" he smiled bitterly.
"Hyeon.." you wanted to be proven wrong, you wanted to be wrong so bad.
you wanted to believe hyeon was not capable of this.
you wanted to believe him, your closest friend, would never do such thing.
instead, you received a hug that felt so cold.
you wanted to strangle hyeon so bad. you wanted to strangle yourself.
you just felt so weak.
as much as you wanted to avoid it, the clues were all right in front of you, mocking you.
there was no one in the world who had heard and appreciated your music, who observed and knew so much of your lifestyle and habits besides ivan.
when the puzzle started coming together, you could feel yourself falling apart.
"so y/n, please tell me:
what is your favourite love language?"
you just want to die.
[draft messages]
y/n:
thanks for taking me in
im glad i hv u in my lufe
you better not tell anyone i said this,
but i dont think theres anyone else i trust
anyone else more than you
thank you.
a/n: zzzzz goodnight (disappears)
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farfromstrange · 7 months
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Is It Over Now? | Matt Murdock x Reader
Masterlist
Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader ; (hinted) Frank Castle x Reader ; Elektra Natchios x Matt Murdock
Summary: Matt cheated on you, and you are trying to navigate through it.
Warnings: Angst, no happy ending, break-up, mention of cheating, song references (Taylor Swift), inspired by 'Is It Over Now?', (some) Matt "slander", (somewhat) suicidal thoughts, alcohol consumptions, hint at smut
Word Count: 1.7k
A/n: 1989 TV came out and I am losing my shit. Is It Over Now? Is my new favorite song and I just had a brain fart that made this. You can read this if you're a Swiftie and catch the references or just read it without listening to the song. It works either way.
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It wasn’t supposed to end like this.
To be fair, there was a time when you thought it would never end. The thought of ever having a last kiss with him would have killed you back then. 
He told you that you were the love of his life. You believed him. He was yours, certainly. You can’t deny that.
You were happy, you laughed and cried together, and part of you figured that if you ever broke up, you would find a way to work through it somehow. 
Maybe in another universe, you are still together. Maybe in another universe, you two are still friends. Maybe in another universe, you never had to lose each other.
In this reality though—in this brutal, unforgivable reality—everything changed in a matter of a day. And there is nothing you can do about it now.
Your flower was withering in secret, and you didn’t realize what it was doing to you. Every time you woke up alone, every canceled date, every time he called you and told you he wouldn’t make it home tonight, it was sure to build up to this. 
But this, whatever the hell this is, it hurts beyond compare. 
He said you were a rose, but now that you look in the mirror, you only see a rotten mess.
The past few months have done this to you. He has done this to you. The paper airplanes crashed and burned. There is nothing left but pure bitterness and this hatred you have toward yourself and him; you just want to land your fist in his face, and then maybe your own because how could he hurt you like that after making you love him so very much? 
You loved him so much, but now you doubt he ever loved you back. 
Date after date, coffee after coffee, nights spent together on his couch and in his bed, sharing laughter, sharing tears, it all feels like a hoax now. 
You held him when he was unconscious, stitched him up and told him he was going to be okay. Where was he when you were bleeding out from your own battles? You wonder.
His smile used to be your safe haven, the epitome of innocence and strength, but now it only makes you angry. It makes you resent him. You shouldn’t, you really shouldn’t, but you still do.
So much has changed, and all it took was one day. 
One day. 
Three hundred days, all wasted in one. 
If you think about it, you spent almost an entire year attached to each other’s side. You moved in together. You kissed, you had sex, you shared secrets you wouldn’t have told anyone else. You helped him hide away from the world, from his enemies, made the world go quiet, and comforted him while he cried. You waited up, you worried, and you almost lost him more times than you can count, and you still stayed.
When no one else would take a chance on him, when he felt everyone was against him and going to leave him, you acted as his rock. You stayed.
You thought he was the one. 
And then it just… ended. 
You gave him the benefit of the doubt when you found her in his dress shirt on his leather couch. The very same couch you two often shared passionate nights on, but at the same time it used to be a symbol of so much more than that.
You let him explain. He explained that she got seriously hurt after showing up out of nowhere, and he just wanted to help without putting you at risk. You believed him because that is the kind of man he was in your head. He was going through some things, things you couldn’t possibly understand, and she was the connection. You tried to understand. In the process of understanding him though, you lost yourself. 
That is something you will never forgive him for. Making you care, making you love him, and unintentionally making you give up on yourself while he continued to break your heart.
You never wanted this to end, never wanted him to go, but in the end, it was the only way. Sticking around wasn’t an option anymore, you have to remind yourself.
He did the one thing he promised he would never do. He broke your heart and your trust into a million pieces that you are now left to pick up on your own. 
You didn’t want to see it before. You were too in love to open your eyes.
He wouldn’t do such a thing, right? You remember repeating that to yourself, to your friends, to Foggy and Karen, but Karen saw him with her, too, and she gave you little hope.
Still, you believed in him. You believed in his morale and his faith. You had faith in him, not even in God but in him and the man he pretended to be—and somehow, he still picked up the knife when you weren’t looking and buried it in your back. 
There were so many signs, but you were blind. So many flashing lights. Red flags. Screaming voices in the back of your head begging you to think. You were in a forest full of trees, yet you saw nothing.
When you came home to find his lips on hers, that’s when you knew. Too little, too late.
He called your name. He told you, “This isn’t what it looks like!” But you lost count of the times he used the same line in relation to her.
To anything, really. He always knew how to talk his way out of something when you were together, although back then, it was mostly harmless.
“I trusted you,” you remember saying. You couldn’t even cry. “And you turned right back around and fucked her!”
“It was just a kiss,” he argued. 
“Are you sure about that? ‘Cause if I ask Elektra, I’m sure she will tell me the truth.”
“No,” Matt was adamant because he could hear your heart breaking.
The way you spoke to him was so eerily quiet. That was how he knew he lost you, and he tried to fix it with nothing but his hands. 
But that is not how you fix a broken vase. That’s how you make it worse and hurt yourself in the process.
You remember him opening his mouth, having the audacity to apologize. “I’m sorry,” he said. 
“No. Fuck you, Matt!”
You tore the necklace with his initial off your neck and tossed it at his feet. You couldn’t even look at it. You wonder what happened to it after he picked it up. 
“I trusted you. I gave you the benefit of the doubt. I was there when no one else was, and this is how you repay me?” you said.
You should have never let him fool you.
At least you had the decency to keep your lonely nights to yourself.
“Sweetheart, please,” Matt tried to beg again. 
You wouldn’t let him. Thank God you were strong enough to withstand the tears in his eyes. 
“You’re a fucking traitor, Matthew Murdock,” was one of the last things you said to him. “I wish we’d never met.”
Three hundred days. You fell in love. You finally knew what love felt like, and then…then he turned around and fucked it all up. 
“We’re done.”
Some days, you still regret it, but if it was so easy for him to toss all this time together down the drain, he probably wasn’t worth it. 
But God, you were so in love. 
Sweet nothings whispered in your ear are gone now. You’re all alone in your bed. No one to cuddle, no one to touch. It has been a while since you heard someone say, “I love you,” and mean it. You felt loved until you didn’t. Until the life he led ate him up. 
Instead of talking, instead of fighting with you, he drove you into a tree. A car that didn’t need sight, and still he crashed. It was winter then, the snow painted red by the blood of your broken heart. Your favorite dress torn up as you tried to escape. He reached for you the same way you reached for him, but you weren’t there. And he wasn’t there when you needed him most.
Part of you feels bad. You could have worked through this if he hadn’t kissed her. Or maybe you wouldn’t have. In the end, it killed you. It killed him. 
You killed each other. 
Though there are still days when you think about jumping off of very high somethings just to get his attention. Just for him to see you. To come to rescue you. It is a hurtful and selfish thought. Yet, you can’t help it. 
He was your first true love. 
Your mind keeps repeating the same sentence: It wasn’t supposed to end like this. 
“You’re the best thing that ever happened to me,” he told you once. 
He searched for something greater in the bed of someone he loved before. You weren’t his first love. You should have known he would say that and not mean it.
But when exactly did you go wrong?
Was it over when he stopped coming home at night? Was it over when he forgot your anniversary? Was it over when he canceled your birthday dinner? Or was it over when he shoved his throat down his ex-girlfriend’s throat in front of you and acted as if it didn’t matter? Was it over then?
“Another one for the lady,” a voice pipes up beside you. 
Your empty glass of tequila disappears, now replaced by a full one. In your drunken haze, you see a head of brown hair, and his smirk makes you wonder if there’s more to him than he lets on. 
“Thank you,” you murmur, tipping your glass to the stranger. 
“Nah, don’t thank me.” He sits down next to you. “You look miserable.”
“What if I am?”
“I’d tell you I know the feeling.”
You huff but offer the stranger your hand with a mention of your name.
He smiles. Your name rolls off his tongue effortlessly. “Frank,” he introduces himself in return. “Castle.”
“Nice to meet you,” you say. 
Broken people make bad decisions, but whether it was over when he took her right there on his couch, or it was over when you told him it was doesn’t matter. 
It is over now, and all you want to do is forget. 
You need to forget Matt Murdock. 
And if this stranger called Frank needs to unbutton your blouse to help you do so, you will gladly follow him home. 
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Matt Murdock Tag List: @acharliecoxedfan @gpenguin666 @linamarr @itwasthereaminuteago @mattkinsella @norestfortheshelbywicked @yarrystyleeza @littlenerdyravenclaw @thychuvaluswife @schneeflocky @imjustcal @pipsqueakkitten @merlinbtch @ravenclaw617
(also, I keep tagging you in stuff, but I also think you might like this @blackshadowswriter)
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never not mine, m | jjk | "... in your eyes."
pairing(s): jungkook x reader
You'll find that you were never not mine. Wandering sometimes leads to finding. Finding sometimes leads to the truth. The truth sometimes leads to pinning someone to the wall and kissing them. But only if it feels right.
part i | part ii | this is part iii
warnings: rated M (18+) for language; sloooow burn; exes-to-lovers / second chance romance; angst and fluff and feels; your POV; smut (nipple play, scratching / marking, handjob, cum-eating / feeding, fingering, penetrative sex - missionary, doggy)
non-idol!AU; fashion model!Jungkook — ft fellow model/actor!Kim Taehyung and model/businessman!Kim Seokjin; reader is not part of the entertainment industry
--
“What is the most important lesson in your life you’ve learned so far?”
The most important lesson I’ve learned, huh… I think I would say that even though this world is difficult, tough, downright unbearable at times, it is okay to be comforted by the small things. I think a lot of people ignore those small things when they’re upset since they seem frivolous or out-of-touch to appreciate when you are having a hard time. But those are the most important times to enjoy them. We should not feel guilty about a small happiness. A taste of a favorite sweet. The sunset sky when you look up. Laughing with a friend even though everything around you feels dark. These moments will become the stars that will light up your universe in this black world.
For such a friendly, unassuming young man in a suit, he had been such a poet.
At first, you wondered if this was something you could apply on to your life. You had asked, it works in reverse too, doesn’t it?
He had tilted his head, inquisitive. What do you mean?
Small, painful things can slowly but surely break a reverie too, if you don’t take notice of them.
Ah. You’re right.
Each conversation had been insightful in its own way. The woman in the white dress. The most important lesson I’ve learned is loyalty. You might not make as much money or be as famous as you would if you turned your back on someone, but money and fame are fleeting. If you nurture those around you well, you will live a fulfilled life. The man with the silvery-blonde hair and white dress shirt. What an odd question. For me… to be proud of doing what I want to do, even if I may not measure up to the success of others. When I was younger, I thought it was more important to reach a massive audience, to have many people see my color. But now... I don’t think that’s what I want. I want to be an important part of someone’s life, short-term or long-term. I want my time to count to those who count. The woman in a tight denim number and lots of colorful bracelets. It’s important to be yourself. No one walks the same path. You might be too much for some but you might be just right for others, and those people will end up understand you best. The last one, a man with a bright smile and black dress shirt that seemed to barely contain his energy. An important lesson, huh? I guess I would say, go for it. Sometimes I’m uneasy or not confident in a new situation, and I have to remember to just go for it. Yeah, I think I’ve learned a lot from just doing rather than thinking too long about it. The only thing holding me back was being scared. But, being scared doesn’t mean you can’t take action. It means you can, because you have the strength to acknowledge your fear.
Yes, well.
Going for it sort of ended in smashing over a million won worth of liquor into the ground.
You couldn’t blame the advice though. Honestly, you were glad for it. You were glad for each and every connection you made tonight with those strangers. You weren’t sure if Kim Seokjin had set it all up or if each one had approached from their own curiosity. A mixture of both, maybe. Before, they had all been only pretty faces. A shallow judgement for each individual’s hopes, dreams, and realities. You were sure that was Seokjin’s plan – for you to see for yourself what kind of world you were in.
Maybe not so vapid after all.
A little silly, perhaps.
“Hmph, well, at least I can thank you for not letting me walk into a porn scene.”
You winced as Kim Seokjin folded his arms. You both had stopped at the end of the hallway with Seokjin waving the guards away to speak to you directly. Your feet were mildly hurting from standing up for so long. It could have also been due to the emotionally draining past hour.
“I had no intentions of that,” you protested.
Those perfect brows furrowed in disbelief. “Uh huh.”
You made a face. “Nothing was happening back there.”
“Uh huh,” Seokjin tittered again.
You couldn’t keep looking up at him anymore. He held a hand up as you shifted your eyes to the wall, crossing your arms too. Mostly to keep warm. And to hide a bit.
“Nu uh, I don’t want to know what dirty things you two were talking about.”
You couldn’t help but roll your eyes. “It’s not like that–”
Seokjin cut you off abruptly. “Did it help?” he inquired pointedly. “Did smashing one of my most expensive bottles of alcohol provide the catharsis you were looking for?”
You felt your cheeks heat. “S-Sorry, I’ll pay for it–”
“Hmph!” He sounded and looked offended. “I don’t need money. I have plenty of that. What I don’t have plenty of is somewhat sane people in my life. I watched you destroy public property and slap one of my security guys as if it was a normal Friday night for you.”
You cowered a bit. “Ah… I’ll apologize to him too.”
Seokjin sighed. He was a refined man with a hint of childishness that gave him eternal youth.
“I was glad to see it.”
He laughed slightly, shaking his head. You stared at him.
“I was nearly afraid that dating Jeon Jungkook had broken you.”
Wait.
“Broken me?”
His large shoulders slumped a little. “Ah, it was… It was so obvious. With Jungkook, too. It was as if the light had been sucked out of him. And you. There was a coldness about you that formed. I worried if you could hear all the whispers behind hands. Hoped Jungkook-ah had shielded you from them or, I don’t know, made you impervious somehow. But you could feel it too, couldn’t you? The ostracization. And he had contributed to it, in time.”
He had noticed.
That was enough to touch your heart.
You faltered. “It’s none of your fault. Or his circle of friends.”
Seokjin waved his hand. “Of course not. But it was still there. Hearing mindless droning all day is still a minor annoyance that builds up to a hornet’s nest over time. And I – no, we – spoke up too late.” He lowered his arms, defeated. “There isn’t much I can do, I know. But I wanted you to know that not everyone among us feels that way. Not everyone has their head in the clouds. Not just my circle of friends, but lots of people in this industry are good people with good intentions who are much better at comforting words than I am.”
You felt a surge of gratitude. Maybe for the first time tonight, you felt like crying. You lifted your head to soft, black brown eyes that were the windows to a big heart.
“Thank you.”
He seemed taken aback. “Ah… Right. Yes, you’re welcome,” he mumbled awkwardly.
You bowed to him.
“S-Stop that!” He smacked your shoulder with a mix of panic and defiance. “Don’t be ridiculous. And, anyway, I didn’t even succeed! You still ended up in an altercation with that big-nosed dongsaeng of mine. Hah…”
You laughed a little. “Ah, I’m sorry about that too. It was my fault he was so riled up.”
Seokjin gave you a contemptuous look that would put even the most disapproving aunt to shame. “No, really?”
You tried not to laugh. He was making it very difficult. It was probably the designer suit and corporately-parted hair mixed with his cartoonish reaction. “Please don’t be too hard on him.”
He made a disgruntled face as if he had to deal with an obnoxious puppy. “You should be worried about me. I’m sure he’s back there stomping his feet and being a stubborn little shit. Hah, well. I’ll have security escort you to your car waiting outside. Don’t slap anybody.”
You pouted. His youthfulness was infectious. “Aish, I won’t. I know my limits.”
“If only your other half did.” Seokjin threw up his hands in exasperation. “Go before I change my mind.”
He wouldn’t.
You backed off anyway, letting Seokjin saunter off, and was greeted halfway to the door by a kind security guard who didn’t ask if you were going to slap him. He did seem amused though. He was professional enough to keep it to himself, leading you to a side entrance where a black car was waiting to take you home after a very long and enlightening night.
-
Night felt different now.
Days felt different too, but the change wasn’t as obvious due to the hours consumed by work. There was plenty of distraction during the day, although you became strangely aware to how the world seemed different. How the sunlight seemed brighter. How there seemed to be a rhythm to the birds’ wings as they flapped away. How you occasionally caught yourself scanning the faces on streets, looking for something.
Someone.
But the sunset is when you noticed the shadows dancing around you. As the day died, you watched people slip from their responsibilities to their desires. A warm meal. A visit to the store to pick up a visual treat or a world within pages. A chance to see a familiar face, ending in a hug or, if lucky, a kiss. Stories within bodies.
You, too.
You found yourself at the movie theater again. You spent a moment, scanning the titles, picking an action movie you had never heard of. Even splurged for the popcorn, shaking it up in the bag with the salty, garlicky powder getting on your fingertips. You spotted a few clusters of friends. Couples. But also a few single individuals that were busy getting comfortable in their seats, placing their belongings just so, as if they did this all the time.
So, you too, sat down and placed your black bow purse beside you, adjusting your popcorn bag to the perfect snacking distance. It was exciting as the lights dimmed to black, enjoying the music score in surround sound, sucked into another world of imaginary action that you could safely enjoy despite all the bullets.
With popcorn, of course.
It felt different now.
It was only after you made your way home that you realized why.
And you smiled.
Another night, you decided to stop by the mall. Not to buy anything really, but to listen to the music at each of the stores. In this day and age of everything online, it was rare for you to make the effort. It was different now though, somehow. Honestly, not so bad. You purchased an overpriced drink and pretended to look at all the clothes as you listened to what was popular right now. Occasionally, you heard something interesting and pulled out your phone to search for the title of the song vis one of the lyrics, the usual way you used to do it. There were definitely apps for identifying songs instantly now, you thought, but there was something hands on and extra satisfying of replicating an old process.
You found yourself in front of a wall of skirts.
You looked up at the colors, the patterns, and saw nothing of what was currently in your wardrobe.
At work, you were required to dress semi-professionally. A lot of single-color blouses, long black skirts, simple silhouette dresses. A cardigan was your idea of spicing it up. In fact, today you were in a maroon button-up blouse with a high neck and billowy sleeves, and your signature long black skirt. Black heels with a cross strap detail, nothing special. Before, while you were dating Jungkook, you had borrowed a lot of clothes, as they had been required for specific events. Transactions. Nothing you personally owned, nor needed to. Even the small, tight dresses that you had purchased for dates you didn’t own anymore. You had donated them all. They had been purchased with the intent to look like a model’s girlfriend. Not to look like, well.
Yourself.
A pink gingham miniskirt with small red strawberries stitched onto it caught your eye.
You left the store with a brown bag with a few parcels wrapped in pink tissue paper and a lighter bank account. Did you know where you were going to wear these clothes? Nope. It was different, buying without a purpose, and yet.
It was an excuse to find an occasion.
You settled on a bench with a smile.
You held your drink and lifted your head, watching people walk past. Seeing glimpses of their stories through the windows of shops. A surprised face at seeing something they wanted. A look of bliss once they took a sniff of a scented candle. A wringing of hands in front of a gift shop, running out of time and paralyzed by decision. You took a sip, wondering if they would be successful. Your thoughts wandered, as they always did. I have someone. Individual realities parallel to yours, with the occasional interaction a demonstration of interaction. Moments that required moving against the natural course for a purpose. Sometimes a brief purpose, and sometimes entangled because they wanted to be.
The question was, did you want to be?
You had become aware of how your line had been. Dulled by distraction, lacking intersections, moving the lonely course without remorse. All the small things becoming a blur of monotony. The roses had become colorless from the coldness that you had inadvertently held onto.
Bit by bit, you were finding color once more.
You stood up with your empty cup, hurrying to find the appropriate trash can to dispose it in.
“Hey, excuse me!”
You started.
A mother with her arm around a small child’s shoulders waved at you. “Your shopping.”
“Oh, sh–sorry!”
You went back, bowing repeatedly as you picked up the brown bag, startled that you had forgotten your quite expensive purchases. The child shook their head at you. You sheepishly laughed, letting yourself be scolded by the kid. “An adult shouldn’t be so careless!” Well, that was a bit harsh, but you thanked them anyway, waving as you parted.
You turned around, returning to your escape route.
Careless, huh?
Maybe the kid was right.
Someone in black was walking down the path. A man. He was walking fast. An oversized grey beanie with dark hair poking out. Body drowning in a slashed black hoodie and ripped jeans. Black boots. Black face mask. It was a bit odd because he was wearing sunglasses inside. Still, there was no reason for you to look twice. He looked up.
Somehow you knew your eyes had met.
You slowed down.
Jeon Jungkook slowed down, reaching up to remove his glasses.
Would your eyes have met if you hadn’t had to double back to retrieve your shopping bag?
If you weren’t careless?
You saw him catch his breath as soon as he knew it was you. You weren’t sure how he knew. Then again, how did you know? This entire adventure had been on a whim. He stopped at a reasonable distance from you, and half-lowered his face mask, as if to greet you. But neither of you could utter a word. You held your small black purse that you haven’t changed in several years. It was a simple design with the designer embossed in very small font above a leather bow sewed flush to the front. Unremarkable, really, unless you knew.
And he knew, because Jungkook had brought it for you.
The first gift at the very beginning. He looked from the bag to you. Wondering if he should comment on it. He hesitated, and you understood why. Two parallel lines. No interaction would occur unless one moved against the natural course and doing so would be, well.
Careless.
“I hope,” you started, cautiously. Something flickered in those big brown orbs. “I hope Kim Seokjin didn’t scold you too much.”
He lowered his head a bit, half-laughing and half-scowling. “I did get a scolding for causing a commotion.”
“It was my fault,” you acknowledged once again.
He shook his head. “No, it was mine.”
You half-smiled. “Wanna fight about it?”
Jungkook raised his head, still holding onto the bottom of his face mask. You could see the mirth in his stance. It was almost as if there wasn’t a weighing limbo trapped between you and him.
“Actually, yeah.”
Almost immediately, you saw him falter, as if he knew he shouldn’t say something like that. You felt a sting witnessing it. He opened his mouth, and you almost heard it, his casual, just kidding, and this wasn’t like him at all.
“Hey, Jungkook.”
You interrupted him before he could add, just kidding. He stiffened, exposing hints of the printed white t-shirt under the tears of his hoodie. You were both occupying space on the walkway. People needed to walk around, some unbothered, some slighted by the inconvenience. His name on your tongue felt foreign and familiar at the same time. An end and a beginning all at once.
I have someone.
So did you.
You smiled.
“It’s really good to see you out and about.”
His eyes widened. You hoped he could tell that you meant it. “Yeah.” He cleared his throat a bit, trying to eliminate the sudden croak. “Yeah. You too. I’m…” His eyes shifted a bit. He was always focused on you, regardless. “I’m glad I ran into you today.”
And maybe that was it.
You were okay with that, though. That might have previously been a lie, but not now. It was probably unnecessary to say. Perhaps you had spoken up for some sort of closure, for both you and him. A chapter ended in some way.
He rubbed the back of his neck, ticking his head to the brown bag by your side. “You came to shop today?”
You held it up halfway with a chuckle. “Ah, well… It wasn’t the plan. Ended up that way.” You noticed the way he intently observed your actions. Couldn’t avoid it, really. You lowered the bag, not hiding even though it was maybe the better thing to do. “What about you?”
He paused. Had he forgotten already? You watched him gain his bearings with bemused patience.
“Ah, I…”
Jungkook looked and sounded embarrassed.
“What the hell,” he muttered, shaking his head. “Actually, I cancelled a shoot last minute.”
Your head tilted. “I’m surprised. That’s not like you.”
His pink lips upturned. You could spot that tiny mole underneath them, right at the center. “Yeah…” He trailed off, unable to meet your gaze. Ashamed, almost.
“It’s okay, though,” you offered. You hated to see that expression on his face. “You did what you felt was right. These things happen.”
He scoffed, shoving his hands in his pockets. “I haven’t cancelled a shoot since…” He stopped.
You waited.
Jungkook glanced at you. You saw a pink twinge dust across his cheekbones.
“Since I first asked you out.”
You blinked at him. “What are you talking about?” You frowned. “I don’t remember anything like that.”
He winced and looked up at the ceiling, rocking on his heels a bit. “Actually, I… I lied. I pretended I wasn’t getting any bookings. Just to spend time with you in the beginning. But, uh, then I felt guilty. I wasn’t the man I thought I needed to be. The man you deserved.” He sighed, yanking one of his hands out to scratch his eyebrow absentmindedly. “But maybe I never was, because then I got swept up in all that bullshit.”
Jungkook looked down.
“I know it’s too late to say such things now.”
He seemed to collapse a little bit despite his tall frame.
“Now, it’s…” He sighed. “I can’t concentrate at all. I keep asking myself what I’m doing. For a while there I kept working in hopes that you would…” He grimaced again, but chose to ramble on anyway. “So you would still see me everywhere. Stupid, huh? And now it’s just…” He shook his head. “I think I should give up.”
You didn’t know what to say.
He took a deep breath and straightened. “Ah, my bad. I went on for nothing.” Bowing slightly, backing away. “I have a lot on my mind. I didn’t expect to run into you and now I’ve run my mouth like a madman.”
“Jungkook.”
His name came out of your mouth before you registered it. He stopped moving, looking back at you, halfway between pulling up his face mask. You struggled to find the words, clutching your unexpected purchases and your racing heart, his first present to you against your ribs.
“Don’t give up.”
You made sure not to break eye contact.
“It’s not like you to give up, you know. It’s my… my favorite thing about you.”
He seemed stunned.
“R… Really?”
You couldn’t help but smile. Nervously albeit fiercely determined.
“One of many.” You relaxed a bit, relieved that you were able to say so. You laughed a little at the absurdity of it all. “Although perhaps we need to stop doing these kinds of things in public.”
Jungkook jumped, seemingly realizing all the people around too. “Ah… Whoops.”
You bowed as you spoke. “Then, I’ll…”
The way he said your name, so soft and dreamlike, made you freeze mid-movement. He seemed flustered, stepping a little closer to you. It was the correct moment to pull back, replace some respective distance between you and him to keep a measure of strangers, and yet.
You let your eyes meet his under wisps of black hair sticking out of his beanie.
“Can we spend a little more time together? If it’s not too much trouble?”
It was. You had work tomorrow. You needed to get home and put away your things. Wash up. Do your nightly routine to unwind. Get back to being a responsible adult with responsibilities living a responsible life.
Your lips curved into a mischievous smile.
“Sure.”
-
“Where do you want to go?”
“Anywhere.”
You were standing by his motorbike now. His pride and joy, yet you knew it was rarely used in his day-to-day life. For the best, probably, considering the risk. You weren’t surprised to see it today though. He always rode when he felt frustrated or out of it. The walk here had been silent, which you had expected. Jungkook was the king of speaking without a plan. You didn’t mind it, though. It reminded you of good times.
He awkwardly shuffled, obviously realizing that himself now.
“Hey.”
“Uh?” he answered distractedly.
“Why did you ask me out back then?”
He fumbled with his hands a bit. “Ah, that’s…”
You tilted your head, patiently waiting.
“I…” He stuttered a bit. Cleared his throat again. “I just couldn’t help but look twice. I thought you were hot as hell.”
You almost snorted. “Don’t you encounter enough of that at work?” you chuckled.
He shook his head. “No, it’s more like… Um, even if they’re attractive, everyone knows it is pretty for a purpose. They’re all taking care of themselves. Looks are the selling point, after all.” He poked at his own chest. “Me too.” He raised his head to you. “But you’re different. You don’t have to think about how you look will reflect in a paycheck. You take care of yourself for yourself.”
You thought about it. It didn’t seem that extraordinary. “Well, anybody can do that.”
He smirked.
“If anybody could do it, why could I only see you?”
Heat rushed to your cheeks. You raised a hand to smack him and stopped short. Instead, you let your hand fall and half-rolled your eyes. “Ehhh, don’t try to pull that stuff on me.”
He laughed behind his hand. “Have to try.”
You frowned with feigned annoyance. Jungkook had always been taller than you, even in heels, assuming you weren’t opting for miniature stilts. Still, you always had the impression he was never looking down at you, but up, even when his eyes were downcast.
“Yeah, that.”
You narrowed your eyes. “What?”
“That look you’re giving me right now,” he chuckled sheepishly. “I knew you’d be able to balance me out and set me straight.”
You squinted at him. You let out a puff of air and looked away, tumbled into memories where maybe you could have been the one to change the course of these parallel lines. “Yeah, and look where that got us,” you muttered.
Sigh.
Somewhere behind you, a car honked loudly.
“Standing next to each other?” Jungkook quietly asked.
Two cars were having trouble at an intersection at the end of the row.
Standing next to each other.
Your gaze drifted back and locked with his. He didn’t try to hide the emotions his eyes. You were quite sure he could see through you too. The impasse remained, not because a bridge couldn’t be built, but because it couldn’t bear to be burned once more. Once more meant it would crumble to ash and disappear forever. You had thought it already had, until tonight.
You tried to reason with the unreasonable. “You cannot believe you skipping work and me deciding to spend a good chunk of my paycheck to mean some serendipitous shit, can you?” you scoffed.
He gave you that brilliant smile that had tamed you from the very beginning.
“You–”
You poked him hard in the chest.
“Ahh!”
Jungkook must not have expected that at all.
He almost fell over.
Your hand shot out and grabbed a fistful of his hoodie, dragging him back. His body lurched, slightly off balance, and your elbow swung forward, bracing onto his abs, leaving your faces close enough together for bystanders to get the wrong idea. For him to get the wrong idea. For you, too. You were close enough to count his eyelashes.
Enough time elapsed that you might as well have.
“What… What is with you?” you muttered, gripping his clothes. “You’re so… dramatic.”
He had another piercing on the side of his right lip now. Huh. How come you didn’t notice? Probably too busy being mad at him. Or not staring at his lips in fear of indecent thoughts. This current proximity and shared heat were not helping. His hands were somehow on your shoulders. Probably to steady himself. Or something else. You weren’t sure.
Jungkook stared at your lips.
You didn’t back away.
He leaned down and kissed you.
He must be an idiot to put you both in this position again. You must be an idiot too, because you kissed him back. Fuck it. Your hand on his chest relaxed, fingers spreading out, pressing your lips to his, breathing him in. He still used the same cologne you had complimented on back then. It made you smile into his lips. His tense hands on your shoulders fluttered, one slipping down to your upper arm, the other grazing your neck. His thumb brushing the side of your cheek. His other fingers weaving into your hair, tilting his head slightly. No promises, but.
A dream made.
You tapped his chest, forcing him to break the connection.
“W… What?” Jungkook gasped, his short breath mixing into yours.
“Not… Not here,” you chuckled, feeling your racing pulse in your throat. “I think we’ve done enough public reconciliation. Adding public indecency is not it. Someone is going to recognize you soon.”
Those shadowed eyes watching you were telling you he was ready to risk it.
“No,” you gritted, punching his chest lightly. Surprisingly, Jungkook did not budge and held on very strongly to your arm. “Stop that. Stop it with the sex eyes.”
He grinned. You could tell from the way his eyes crinkled. “Is it working?”
You pried yourself from him with some effort.
“All you’re telling me is that you really like handcuffs.”
“Promise?”
You straightened your clothes and answered absentmindedly. “Promise what?” You looked up to give him an indignant expression. He took your purchases to place them in the back of his motorcycle, giving you no verbal response.
Just a sneaky smirk in return.
-
“What did you think was gonna happen?”
“Uh…”
Before he could make another sound, you grabbed Jeon Jungkook by the collar and dragged him to you.
It was different.
Just not in the way you thought it would be.
Part of you thought to hold back. Build a solid foundation to see if this would work. Talk for a long while, move slow, step by recommended step. Then again, if you actually believed that, you would have instructed him to take you back to your apartment. Maybe send him off with a kiss and a pat on the head. You know. The complete opposite of shoving him up against his living room wall and tracing your tongue over his moaning lips with his hands gripping your waist. If this was going to work, it was always going to work. It didn’t matter if it was the wrong way or the right way.
This love was either going down in a blaze of glory or start an everlasting fire.
Might as well get on the ride.
You let him kiss down your neck, your hands sliding down to his. Interlocking fingers. Shivering at the sensation of his lips in your skin, familiar and new. Body-to-body. You pulled up his hands to force him to lose the top layers, including the beanie, exposing his toned chest and gleaming tattoos going from his right hand to his shoulder. His hoodie and t-shirt fell to the floor in a soft thump. His hair was different than when you had last seen him. Sides shaven, the top still long, messy black waves due to being crammed into the beanie. He flicked his head back, sending black strands all over his half-moon eyes, glistening pink lips parted in a soundless gasp.
You took his wrists and pinned Jungkook to the wall.
Panting, watching him under you despite looking upwards.
“W… What?” he breathed, locked in your transfixed stare.
It was different, yet it was the same. You could feel it. There could have been many others between the last time and right now. You knew there wasn’t. It was both sad and validating, because you knew how much he hated being alone, but now you knew there was truth to those promises he had said to you between sheets and pillows.
You leaned down and licked a wet, fat stripe over his chest, dripping saliva all over him.
Jungkook moaned, leaning his head against the wall.
“You belong to me,” you whispered over his heart. Raised your head and he was looking back at you.
Only you.
“I belong to you,” he whispered back.
You skimmed your lips over his skin.
“Prove it to me.”
He surrendered.
To your tongue, tracing patterns over his collarbones. To your lips, dotting kisses and making him flinch, whining for more. To your hands, holding him down and at your mercy, exploring him with sight, touch, and taste. You let go of one of his wrists to trail your nails over his abdomen, observing the way his body rippled, lifting towards you as sensitivity increased. You let your fingers wander, around his waist and into shaded territory, running your nails down his spine, watching his reaction. His head tilted back, hair in wisps around his temples, dark eyes clouded in lust.
Your name slipped from his lips.
You dug your nails into his lower back and pulled yourself up, unable to keep the side of your lips from curving upwards at his delicious whines.
“Take off my blouse.”
His fingertips slid across the slinky maroon fabric. Button by button, the fabric began to unravel in his hands, your forehead to his as he did so. You took his breath, tracing his muscles, murmuring his name just to feel him shiver as he heard it.
“I never had anyone else after you,” he mumbled, circling one of the buttons with his thumb. “I couldn’t.”
“You could have,” you hummed. “You were a free man.”
Jungkook undid the last button and stared into your eyes.
“No, I’m not.”
You half-smiled. “I wouldn’t take it personally.”
He leaned in again, brushing your lips with his.
“I belong to you.”
His touch, his kiss, the dance of mesmerizing senses. You stepped back. He followed. Tangled in each other, your blouse slipping off and dropping to the floor. Your bra unclasped, tumbling, his hands all over, places he had been a million times and desiring forevermore, squeezing your breasts with his hands, almost tripping over your skirt as you stepped out of it. His pants joined the trail of passion, and then his tongue was on you, lifting you in his arms and tasting your hard nipples with your hands in his hair, clutching his head for support with your legs around his waist.
“I’m going to fall,” you gasped, breathless.
“Over my dead body,” was the muffled answer with his face buried into your breasts. “Fuck, I love your ass.”
Perhaps to avoid death getting two for the price of one, Jungkook let you down, devouring you with kisses with your taste lingering on his lips, sinking his fingers into the soft curves. You curled your tongue against his, making him moan, hips grinding against hips, feeling his insistent hardness against your softness, trapping himself between your legs. You were still in your panties and he was still in his boxer briefs, although the thin fabrics were merely a nuisance to the inevitable.
“Jungkook…”
He was thrusting into you and jamming his cock in between your thighs, his strong arms wrapped around you and his teeth on your shoulder. You hummed, torn between telling him off and enjoying the feeling of his arousal swelling between your legs, but it was he who gasped and threw his head back, his hard length twitching against your clothed pussy.
“You ready to include me in this?” you questioned, amused.
“S-Sorry… Can’t help myself…”
Somehow, by instinct and minor effort, you were both in his bedroom now. The familiar bed you had once called yours, remembering the future dreamed upon those white sheets. Jungkook pulled you to them, calling you to the paradise that could only be created between two. Don’t, was your meek protest as he pulled down your panties and kneaded your thighs, shaking his head, I don’t care, and his tongue slid over your heat. Wet, dripping, your sweet taste and his saliva. He moaned between your legs, decorating you with kisses before sliding his tongue over you, drinking you desperately, you taste so fucking good, fuck, and your fingers buried into the sheets. He remembered everything you liked. Steady, soft licks, then harder when your legs tensed, tipping his head to bring his lips around your clit, drenching his chin with your wetness.
His hands turned and slipped under your legs, dragging you to his face by your ass.
“F-Fuck, Jungkook…”
You reached down and gripped his hair as you came on his face, his muffled gasp of surprise drowned out by the moan produced through your arched back and prolonged euphoria. Fuck. Fuck, it hadn’t been evident how much you missed this, no, him, your knuckles against the crown of his head, his hot tongue all over, his fingers locked onto your ass, even the way his nose brushed against your oversensitive clit as he thrust his tongue into your pussy, triggering another wave of pleasure, sparking electricity that burned through your veins.
His.
He pulled himself up with a groan, his mouth all over your body. Leaving bites, kisses, licks in his lustful wake. Your nails dug into his shoulder and he made that whimper you loved, obviously wanting more, and so you clawed his upper back as he pretended to resist you, refusing to move higher as he sucked on your nipples, gazing at you under half-lidded eyes, rubbing your other nipple between his fingers.
“Take it,” you growled under your breath.
He did, rubbing his hard, neglected cock against your thigh, denying himself longer.
Over time, you had hesitated to do such things. Jungkook had gotten in trouble before for being marked up. After all, his body was his selling point, and booking back-to-back shoots with poor choices in between ended up in humiliation. Unjustly so, perhaps, but you never did it again. Maybe you should have been more considerate this time too, but, no, that wasn’t what he was asking for.
He wanted the consequences of you.
He brought his face close to yours, your orgasm still on his breath.
“Mark me,” Jungkook demanded, his voice low and deep and gravelly. “I’m yours.”
So you did.
Hickeys on his perfect neck, sharp nails over his ass as you pushed down his underwear, adorning him with fierce, vicious passion that bruised him. He kissed your forehead, buried his fingers in your hair, and pinned you to him, pre-cum dripping onto your hip as he kicked off his restraints, pressing his hardness to you.
“You’ll get in trouble,” you warned even though the damage was already done.
“I don’t care,” he retorted, his thigh rubbing against your still-wet pussy. “I don’t care if I have to cancel the rest of the week. I don’t care if I never work in the modeling industry again. The only thing I care about is making sure you always know how much I love you.”
You froze, your lips above the inked floral mandala on his right shoulder.
“I should have made time.”
His arms drew up and encircled your head, his lips against the crown.
“I’m so, so sorry for not realizing how disrespectful I was to you. And I won’t do it again,” he murmured, leaving kisses intertwined with your hair. “I promise.”
“I…”
You reached up and held his shoulders, anchored despite the turbulence of an emotional sea.
“I missed being by your side, Jungkook.”
If his hard dick wasn’t literally throbbing against your hip, you might have cried.
You reached down and touched him.
“Ah!”
“Woah.” Your arm hooked around his waist as your hand enclosed around his girth. “I’m just making sure he’s keeping interest even during this emotional breakthrough.”
His cheeks flushed as he realized he had chosen his moment with possibly suboptimal timing. He didn’t have to worry. His body seemed to recognize your hand right away. You could feel the way his cock eagerly twitched on your palm. You cocked an eyebrow. He gave you a the-fuck-you-expect look, and you curled two fingers around his balls, lightly massaging with the pads of your fingers, simulating your tongue. He gasped, gripping your shoulders.
You leaned down and spit in your hand.
“F-Fuck!”
You backed up and slowly, leisurely, spread the slippery saliva all over his cock, letting him adjust his knees to give you a better positioning. Your other arm had moved behind you, lifting your torso up as you jacked him off. He seemed to not know what to do with his hands, foreign objects in his possession before his eye line drifted down. Down. His fingers trailed over your breasts, squeezing them and playing with your nipples as you increased the pace.
“Handcuffs could come in handy right now,” you commented.
He glared at you.
“S… Shut up.”
His cock had throbbed at the suggestion though.
You tilted your head, watching his breathing quicken as you applied the pressure where he liked it, the same pulse every time, not too fast and not too slow, building the frustration with a smile.
His face tensed.
Faster. A little tighter. Your thumb rubbed just under the base of the head with every ascent. He placed his palms against your hard nipples and you felt the familiar snap of his hips, leaning into your hand, his eyelashes fluttering, and for a brief moment you considered stopping.
Then again, these weren’t your sheets.
He gasped out your name and shot all over your stomach and thigh.
Hot, thick cum splattered onto your skin, making you suck in a breath as you felt it, saw it, smelled it, intense and strong and all over you. You were lucky it was on the thicker side, white streaks sticking to your body rather than running off. A painting of perverse proportions. Jungkook stared at his work, still semi-hard in your hand, clearly turned on by the sight. You sent him a questioning look.
“What now?”
Then he shocked you, and probably himself, by diving down and running his warm tongue over your cum-covered skin.
“Oh, what–”
Instant burning tingles spread throughout your nerves at the contact, vibrating through to your core, dripping as you witnessed the milky white coat his tongue. Your hand touched his shoulder, drawing him up, and he was tamed by your gesture, rising, his lips smeared with his release, and you drew closer to the heavy scent, to him. Lips to lips. Drank it from his mouth, swallowing the mixture of saliva and orgasm. Your tongue tangled in his, his fingers in between your legs again, thrusting two fingers into you, following the pull you had on him. Deep, slow, faster as the kiss grew more intense, breath to consumed breath, rolling your hips up into his hand, tightening around him, and Jungkook moaned, getting harder in your hand as your slick arousal drenched his.
“Condom?”
They spilled over the bed in his haste.
You were pleased to see it was the same brand you usually enjoyed. There wasn’t much to be read into that, though, because they had become his favorite as well per your introduction. You wondered if there would be a second first-time awkwardness and you were immediately proven wrong from the desperate and experienced way Jungkook dragged your ass to line up his dick. There was no time to be anxious, it seemed.
“You’ve acting like you’ve never had me before,” you teased.
Those dark eyes narrowed. “Don’t act like you don’t have the tightest, most perfect pussy I’ve ever been in.”
You half-shrugged. “Things could change.”
He slid in and clenched his jaw.
“You liar.”
You smirked and closed in around his length.
“F-Fuuuuuuuck me…”
You could have probably kept it up if it wasn’t for how fucking good he felt inside you. Just the right girth, and he lifted your legs, deeper, gasping, reaching the depth you liked. Your thighs against his chest. You locked eyes. Jungkook cocked an eyebrow with a familiar smirk. The corner of your lips ticked upward, and the rough, powerful pace began, your hand gripping his tattooed forearm and the other the sheets, losing yourself to the pleasure, pressed between the mattress and his hard body. His eyes closed, your lashes fluttering, witnessing glimpses of bliss, whispers of sweet nonsense lost between moans, leaning your head back onto his pillows, sinking into his scent.
Belonging to him.
His hair flicked sweat onto your chest. Your hand on the bed bent back and shoved the pillows down, using the leverage to lift your hips to his thrust, moaning at the visceral sound of slapping hips, wet and loud and vibrating throughout the room.
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he panted out between gasps. “Fuck, you’re so fucking beautiful.”
You tried to deliver a compliment back but it was getting harder and harder to breathe. Your orgasm abruptly interrupted any coherent though, forcing you to bury your head back and endure the vice-grip of wanton delirium, barely able to gasp out his name as the hot wave dragged you under, your inner walls viciously pulsing all around his length. You heard Jungkook groan and attempt to say something, probably how much he enjoyed feeling your orgasm, he had done so before, however he seemed to be in his own dilemma as well, clenching his jaw and snapping his head down, the muscles of his chest taut and tense, and, in your intoxicated haze, you realized he was attempting not to follow, but.
“Fuck!”
He slammed his cock into you and cursed, throwing his head back as you felt the jerk of his cock spilling into the condom, trapped in your tightness, dragged into the kind of fever that couldn’t be sweat out, sinking down, down.
You stilled, suspended in bliss.
It was a little easier to breathe now. You missed this. Him, specifically. The sex you had together, carnal and intense and unparalleled. Closed your eyes, breathing hard, feeling the familiarity of Jungkook on top of you, spent, sweaty, frantic for round two. He didn’t like stopping if he could help it. It was one of his best traits. You felt him lower your legs carefully, backing out of you with a hiss.
Then you heard a wet, dirty sound.
You opened one eye.
He was staring at your body.
Running his fingers over his still-hard cock, bringing it back to full hardness.
“Let me look at you.”
You hummed. “You’re only seeing one side.”
His dark eyes shifted up to yours.
“Okay. Turn over.”
Desire turned his voice deeper, huskier.
With a sly smile, you rolled over, and scooted onto your knees, spreading your ass for him. You heard him suck in a breath, that’s so fucking sexy, and you flexed, letting him watch, entrancing him with the visual and the obvious sound of your wetness.
“Every part of you is perfect.” You could hear him jacking himself off, hard and fast. “Fucking perfect.”
“I feel that your judgement is clouded right now,” you answered back, muffled by his pillows in your face.
You heard the ripping sound and then a groan as he rolled down the condom. Then his strong hands grabbed your hips, prompting you to let go, and he sank into you.
“Fuck no, it’s not,” he gasped, picking you up by the hips to fully sheath himself. You managed to pull a pillow to your chest to allow ample breathing room. “I don’t want anyone else. No one else can satisfy me.”
You made your pussy tighten around him and he moaned again, his hot breath washing down your spine.
“Then let me satisfy you,” you purred, leaning back into him.
Your ass met his crotch in a loud, gratifying smack, easily locking into a rhythm you both enjoyed. Hard, aggressive, powerful, not holding back, you lifting a hand to extend back, and he caught your forearm, thrusting deeply as he held onto you. All of his power was directed below, the grip on your arm simply a symbol of possession, forcing you to lift your head and arch your back, adjusting to that more fruitful angle, sending heat all throughout your blood and nerves, the tension building, louder, harder, more.
He let you go, and you bucked back against him.
Moaned your name, delicious and desperate, begging you.
It was hard to count your orgasms. They seemed to blend into one another, entangled with the passion and the beat, not wanting to stop even as you struggled to breathe, clutching the pillow so hard that you could still feel your nails digging into your palm. The lust searing and yet not enough, chasing more, wanting more, wanting him, only him, your only, the one that belonged to you.
Your head tipped back, seeing only fragments of your surroundings, your hair a mess over your face.
“Jungkook, I love you,” you gasped.
You felt his hips flinch and he moaned your name, long and drawn-out, his hard cock jolting inside you, gripping your hips so tightly you probably had imprints of his fingertips. There was a flurry of expletives and panting. The haze of inexplicable euphoria settling, unavoidable and desired. You closed your eyes, savoring his release, feeling the radiating vibrations of his high pour into you as he slid down, his hot hands over your back, his shuddering exhales warming your shoulder blades.
Sweat, in small shivering droplets, sprinkled onto your skin.
“I love you too.”
He pressed his fingertips into your rising and falling body, touching you all over, confessing to your racing heart beneath his lips.
“I love you so fucking much.”
-
“Are you sure about this?”
“Yeah, totally.”
You turned your head to see Jungkook staring at your tits. You tucked a knuckle under his chin and forced it up. He gave you the big-peepers-in-headlights look.
“Huh?”
“Are you sure about this?” you repeated once more.
He gave you a confused look. “Yeah. I thought we talked about it?”
You raised an eyebrow. “Pardon me, but I’m not sure how much I can trust a discussion we were having with you balls deep inside me.”
“Eh?” His lower lip upturned. “Why not?”
You rubbed your temple with two fingers. “Why not, hah…”
“I meant it.”
You pulled one of his pillows over your naked chest so he could focus. You weren’t even sure why he had these. Jungkook slept on one of those stiff cylindrical pillows that was supposedly more comfortable. You weren’t too sure about how good that was for his neck, but sometimes you just have to accept the strangeness of your significant other. He must have kept these for the look of a nicely made bed. Or for moments like this. His eyes went back to your face again, reluctantly. He seemed a little disappointed.
“You don’t think I meant it?”
You saw his eyes were drifting to your thighs now. “It’s not really that…” You considered it. “It’s more… Well, we’ve tried already, you know. Aren’t you afraid it’ll happen again?”
His gaze shifted. You waited, letting him collect his thoughts.
“Afraid?” You saw him reflect the past and the mistakes. “Yeah. Yeah, I guess I am. I’m definitely going to change from how I was before. I can see how my work-life balance was shit, as both a friend and boyfriend. I don’t want to go back to that either,” Jungkook mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck. “I get it now. I can’t get time back. I was stupid, thinking me overworking myself wouldn’t drive you away, you know, we would have so much more time later… I went about it the worst way. I didn’t even discuss it with you. That was just me being selfish, and that selfishness made me insecure… I don’t want that anymore. I promise you that.” He shook his head and looked up at you guiltily. “Still… I can’t promise I won’t fuck up in some other way. And that scares me. But I have to act, even if I’m scared. Even if your final answer is, let’s not see each other anymore, at least I will have honestly given you my all this time, because you are it for me.”
You shook your head too. “There could be someone out there for you that is a lot more suitable than me. The world is the big place.”
He frowned, exasperated. “No. No, you don’t get it.” He placed a hand on your knee and looked into your eyes. “You are it for me. The world is big place, but my world is right here.” He poked you and you laughed, startled at the suddenness. A smile burst onto his face, holding your knee down, trying to drive his point home over your mirth. “Hey! Hey. I really meant it. All of it.”
You stopped laughing.
Somehow one of your hands was covering his now, feeling his warmth and hard knuckles in your palm.
“I belong to you,” Jungkook repeated, his own I love you. “I can’t love anyone else like how I love you. I don’t care if you believe me or not. Even if you leave me, sure, I might find someone to not be lonely with, but I will only belong to you.”
You held onto his hand, curling your fingers into his palm. “You…” This man was crazy, saying things like this. He affectionately squeezed your knee, flashing that killer smile of his.
“So… Yeah, I’m sure.”
He pulled his hand from under yours and touched your cheek, his knuckles against your skin.
“I’ll go along with whatever you choose.”
Truth was, you had already chosen.
“I’ll do my best too,” you murmured quietly, holding the pillow tightly. “I won’t let myself be complacent anymore.”
From the look in his eyes, you saw that Jungkook recognized that it had become an unintentional consequence of his actions. He smiled, still stroking your cheek.
“Yeah. Let’s be a team this time.”
You nodded, smiling back.
An extended silence of staring into each other’s eyes.
“Jungkook.”
“Hm?”
“Are you just imagining rubbing your dick on my cheek?”
His rough fingertips grazed over your jaw. “Yeah,” he replied dreamily.
You smacked his hand.
“Ow!”
“Pay attention!”
“W-Wha, what?” He pouted. “What am I supposed to do!”
You grimaced, feigning annoyance but also not really. This guy. “No wonder we could only have serious talks in public or incarcerated…” you muttered.
“Ah, yeah, that reminds me.”
You raised an eyebrow at him as he twisted around and reached over to his phone, watching the ripple of his back muscles as he moved. Damn. This guy. He bounced back, messing about on the screen. You were too busy admiring the definition of his arms to notice, until.
“What kind of handcuffs should we buy?” Jungkook chirped, turning his phone to showing you the screen display of a sex goods webstore.
You blinked at him.
“What.”
And thus begun round two.
-
epilogue
“Hey- oh, wow.”
You stilled, surprised.
‘Oh, I thought you were going to meet me there?”
In your hand was your well-loved small black purse with a bow. Your other hand held the door open, seeing the tall form of Jeon Jungkook gawking at you in his matching denim jacket and jeans. Calvin Klein, the same brand as his white t-shirt under the jacket. That same brand was holding a lunch event today, except one of their attendees was blocking your path, open-mouthed at your hips wrapped in a tight, pink gingham miniskirt with embroidered red strawberries. Then his stare went to your chest, to the emerald-green satin blouse that complimented the little green accents of the mini strawberries, although you suspected his interest was less in the color and more in the way the seams accentuated the curve of your breasts.
You raised your eyebrows.
“I… I left early. I wanted to pick you up,” he was saying absentmindedly.
You gestured to the black car waiting at the front. “I already ordered a car, though. I can’t ride with you on your bike in this skirt.”
“We can get in the car.” Jungkook’s eyes went back down. You knew he wasn’t admiring the delicate crisscross straps of your black velvet pumps. “Damn, your legs,” he mumbled.
The driver of the car was about to watch a live-action porno if you didn’t take action. You set the alarm and lock before stepping out. Immediately, Jungkook’s hand raised, as did his gaze. You looked from the tattooed hand to his face. He grinned, creating sparkles in his big dark brown eyes.
“I ran off, hehe. I just wanted to personally accompany my darling,” he admitted. “Hopefully no one noticed.”
You fitted your hand in his, letting him lead you. “You’re too handsome not to notice. What a troublemaker,” you joked, pleased at his rebellion.
“Your troublemaker now. Where are we eating?”
“There’s a French themed café near some shops. After, could we stop by the tea shop? My dad has a request I need to fulfill.”
“Ooo, I love adventures with my future wife.”
You gave him a curious smirk. His mischievous grin just kept getting bigger, that underlip mole suddenly visible like a secret wink. He had been dropping such hints lately. You pretended to gloss over it even though the discussion of dream rings had already happened months ago. You reached out to open the car door and Jungkook impatiently nudged your hand away, doing it for you so you could enter easily in your heels. It was a very nice thing to do.
Taehyung probably grilled such behaviors into him. Not that you were complaining, of course.
You confirmed the destination with the driver as Jungkook got in the car from the other side, taking care to hook his sunglasses on the front of his shirt. You heard his phone vibrate. You turned your head to see him snickering at it.
“Taehyungie’s mad that I left him alone.”
“Whoops.” You did feel a little bad.
He waved a hand, tongue in cheek. “He’ll get over it.”
Your eyes met.
He had such beautiful, expressive eyes that held the stars every time he saw you.
“You sure?” you asked quietly.
Jungkook reached over and stroked your cheek with a smile.
“I’m sure I want to eat lunch with my future wife, yup. Then I’ll buy tea for her dad so I can get on his good side.”
You laughed. “Sounds like a sweet master plan.”
His black hair loosely styled over his forehead made him look younger. You knew better. Perhaps grown was not the word for it, but you could tell he was becoming more and more of the man he wanted to be every day. Attending events with Jungkook was different these days; he checked on you throughout the night, actively included you in conversations, and even introduced you to people he thought you might enjoy talking to, now to the point that familiar faces would come up to you first before they recognized him. But what was more important was this – arranging quality time to spend together, more communication, and obvious commitment. The pleasant surprise not being flowers or sweets or other material things, and instead his presence earlier than expected.
His laugh at night.
His forehead kiss in the morning, even if you were half-awake in bed.
His silly photos of fogging up a makeup artist’s mirror with his breath and drawing a heart with your name inside it.
He still had a hectic schedule, but now you and him knew when enough was enough. You could finally talk about it before either of you became too stressed out or lonely by it. That improvement was worth that entire roller coaster to get here.
You smiled.
He smiled back, his knee touching yours.
He was still stroking your cheek.
“Jungkook.”
“Hm?”
“What are you thinking right now?”
He didn’t respond right away. He just adjusted his legs suspiciously and gave you his most innocent look that indicated he was most certainly guilty.
“Eh?”
You took him by the wrist and slowly lowered it before the driver could notice your partner-in-crime’s suspicious behavior. He pouted at you. The tent in his pants twitched. You cocked an eyebrow. Then you remembered something.
“Oh, by the way.”
He perked up. “What is it?”
You unzipped your purse a little bit and flashed the edge of shiny silver metal and chain.
“I borrowed something from a friend.”
Jungkook looked down.
Odd that it took him more than a moment to recognize handcuffs, considering that he – and you – had so much prior experience with them. His eyes went wide once it clicked. His cheeks flushed red. You smirked and rezipped your bag.
“What the fu–”
fin.
-
i hear... | ... the whispers... | ... in your eyes.
inspired by taylor swift's imgonnagetyouback :)
--
masterpost
271 notes · View notes
lunargrapejuice · 15 days
Text
thanks so much, hero
sephiroth x reader with no pronouns used | 3.3k + words
warnings: hurt/comfort, jealousy, teasing, mutual pining, reader works for shinra/soldier but i didn't specify what kind of job
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it doesn’t mean anything. you know it doesn’t. and even more importantly, you try to remind yourself, it shouldn’t mean anything. at least not to you.
because what reason do you have to be upset over what wasn’t yours.. what would never be yours?
and wasn’t this your stupid, stupid, idea in the first place?
yes, it was you who brought up the idea of a fan meet and greet for the first class soldier as a means to ease the tension of the citizens during this trying time in the war with wutai and yes it was you who helped put the contest together knowing very well this could be the outcome. your foolish heart had just hoped it would end up with an angeal or genesis fan winning but the gods seemed to be enjoying watching your suffering and much to your displeasure, you were giving them a show.
you want to look away, to walk away, maybe just go home for the rest of the day, because you don’t know how much of this your heart can take but your legs and eyes betray you and keep you frozen in place, unable to take your gaze from the hands that touch sephiroth like he’s some kind of coveted item without feelings or emotions or boundaries and the fluttering eyes that are undressing him without any kind of shame.
the tablet in your arms nearly gets crushed against your chest when you hug it tightly seeing the contest winner touch the exposed skin of sephiroths chest and watching her take a step closer to him, breaking out in deep pink blush and smiling shyly up at him, only makes it worse.
is it just you or does she look even more beautiful all flushed too? maybe prettier than when she first walked through the door and became the nail to the coffin of your feelings for sephiroth. whether it was sealing it or attempting to break it, you had yet to decide and right now you don’t want to think about it, can’t think about it, even if the sparkling sharp tip is digging into your chest.
thank the goddess you can’t see his face with his back facing you. you don’t think he’s enjoying being touched by this stranger but it’s not a comfort whatsoever. a part of it is your fault. each of them had agreed to it before the contest was announced but it was your idea and there’s an unswallowable lump in your throat seeing it come to fruition now and it’s for more reasons than being a cause for his discomfort, though that certainly makes the top of the list.
or maybe he was fine with it and it’s only you with the problem here. not wanting someone to touch him in ways you wish only you could and with the gentle care one should use with something precious. not like how this woman is now, on a different level than how the research and development department handles him but it’s on par all the same. had she even asked him if he was okay with this?
is it silly to think that you could protect him in that way anyways? he is the strongest soldier, with power incomparable to any other and if he truly didn’t want her to, he could stop her without using an ounce of his strength but still..
you owe him one big apology once you can get your shit together long enough to slap on an expression that didn’t scream you hated every second of this and pretend it isn’t a punch to the gut and the heart that seems to ripple through every nerve in your body.
stupid legs, just move!
“careful now. you may burn a hole right through her skull if you stare any longer.”
genesis’ voice is what pulls your eyes away and you’re equally annoyed and grateful for that devilish smirk on his lips that says he knows way too much. at least you don’t have to look at sephiroth and this woman any longer and your body finally obeys, allowing you to walk away from this tormenting sight and back towards the first class floor.
“i’m not in the mood,” you say as you walk past genesis, ignoring how unsteady you found your voice.
“are you ever when it comes to your feelings for him?” he teases, following right on your heels.
how long had he been standing there? you wonder. goddess how long had you been standing there?
“remind me to be better about not letting my guard down around you,” there’s no real bite behind your words but right now you could do without his teasing.
“it wouldn’t matter if you did, you’re terrible at hiding your emotions,” he says it so easily, as if everyone knows it to be a fact. “but i think it is not me you need to worry about showing your true feelings too.” he pauses to push the elevator button and you think he’s quite lucky when a second later a handful of 2nd class come out of the elevator right as he adds, “unless of course you’d like him to see you being jealous.”
you take in a deep inhale, hating how right he is, ready to throw your tablet at him but instead you wordlessly step into the elevator, genesis following, and press the button for the first class floor. with a silent wish, you aim to make the rest of this ride a quiet one but it wasn’t like your friend to give in so easily.
“it’s quite cute on you, i must admit.”
you really couldn’t agree. jealousy, this.. protectiveness - possessiveness - that isn’t yours to claim over sephiroth, it felt frustrating.. ugly and heavy. “genesis-”
“you know as well as i do that it doesn’t mean anything to him,” he doesn’t bother clarifying but he doesn’t need to either.
“i don’t know how he feels.”
“clearly.”
you don’t dare read into his words and feel that lump in your throat forming once more. it keeps you quiet and thankfully for the rest of the elevator ride genesis joins you in silence.
it’s too short lived.
one step onto the first class floor and angeals eyes on you, his question restarting the relentless torture you’ve found yourself in today but you think, just slightly, you prefer this over watching the man you’re helplessly in love with be ogled over and touched by another. someone who doesn’t truly know him or cares for him.
“what’s wrong?” angeal asks.
maybe you really were terrible at hiding your emotions. you hadn’t as much as looked his way but you knew genesis wore a smile and it was only you angeal could be talking to.
“someones jealous,” genesis answers for you.
hearing it again cracks your mask, makes it hard to breathe or think or care. you just wanted today to be over and then you were never ever going to suggest something at work again lest you end up in some other kind of fucked up situation where you’re left yearning and breaking under teasing you could handle had you been a little more centered. would it have been easier if you had told sephiroth how you felt? is it worth the risk of losing him when he inevitably doesn’t feel the same? 
it’s not something you can think too deeply about right now.
“i. am. not. jealous.” every word is punctuated with a stride towards angeal. it feels like too much you could explode but you worry it would be you bursting into a fit of tears more than anything else and that’s the last thing you want. especially in front of these two. “she could stand to have some more tact,” you mumble under your breath, letting some of your emotions leak out, not able to care to hold it back or if they hear. you take the paperwork from angeals hands and turn towards genesis. “but what they do isn’t my concern.”
“what’s got you so upset then?” genesis asks.
“your slacking off,” you chide and push the paperwork into his chest, not meeting his eyes or angeals when you make your way towards the closed off office, thankful they seem to have gotten the hint you were finished with this conversation and that lazard is out for the rest of the day so you can sulk in peace. “get back to work.”
the office door shuts quietly behind you and you flip the lock as your back slides down the wood until you’re sitting on the floor, determined to not let anyone see the few tears escaping past your lashes that were hell bent on escaping no matter how much you willed them not to. you wipe them away quickly, like someone might catch you any moment but there’s no one to see. 
you don’t know how long passes while you try to work away your frustration and guilt. the locked door handle moves at some point but it doesn’t open and you don’t look up or answer. your phone dings but you don’t pull it from your pocket. it’s not until the paperwork you had started is finished that you look up to see how late it is.
hardly anyone else is around by the time you leave the shinra building and you’re making the way up the stairs towards your apartment, deciding to make the walk up the last few flights instead of taking the elevator to try to work out the last of the lingering unease so maybe you could fall into bed and just sleep this all away. it’s not likely you’ll wake up and magically not have feelings for sephiroth, it’s a bit hard to even imagine that ever happening, but at least tomorrow you would -
your thoughts, your everything, stops in their tracks the second you step onto your floor and see a familiar figure leaning casually against your apartment door with his arms folded over his chest. there was no mistaking it’s sephiroth. you’ve never met anyone who matched his height or beauty or who captivated you as much as he does and his dark clothes and silver hair only help to give him away instantly.
the next shaky step you take, his head turns and your eyes meet. your heart skips far too many beats at the smile he offers you but somehow your legs don’t give way and you draw closer to him, your worries and woes from earlier in the day falling off of your shoulders and onto the ground behind you with each step you take towards him. 
“wh-what are you doing here?” you question a bit breathlessly, blinking twice to be sure you weren’t imagining him. after each blink, every step you take, he’s still there, waiting for you.
he straightens, standing tall and taking a side step to allow you the space in front of your door. he looks down at you with mako eyes that shimmer in the dim hallway light, wearing an expression you can’t quite decipher but it’s soft, one you can’t tear your gaze from even as your cheeks warm.
he says your name and there’s no mistaking the gentle concern in his voice. “are you alright?”
it makes your chest ache and your mouth spews words that remind you of today’s uncomfortable events before you could stop them from coming out, before you could lie, tell him you’re fine with a smile that probably wouldn’t meet your eyes and would hardly convince his. “i really should be asking you that. honestly sephiroth, i owe you the biggest apology after today.i didn’t think about - i just -”
“own me an apology?” he quirks a brow at you and the confusion on his face is.. cute. boyish. you begin to feel the clouds of unease that had settled in your stomach slowly burst into butterflies. “you haven’t done anything wrong.”
“didn’t i though? if i haven’t come up with the contest idea..” you break your gaze from his, instead focusing on the patch of milky skin you had seen the woman touch earlier. your mouth feels dry, like your body is warning you to not say the words in case your jealousy also shows or he says something like he enjoyed her company and thanks you for introducing him to such a beautiful woman. you swallow it all down, hating how bitter and horrible it tastes, but push through. you know of how little others had cared for sephiroths personal space and you never wanted to be like those people, indirectly or not. this was the least you owed him. “i’m sorry if today was uncomfortable. i hadn’t considered the contest winner being so.. handsy.” goddess you wanted to cry. “fuck - sorry doesn’t even feel like it cuts it. seph, i - i -”
a touch on your arm, warm leather covering powerful fingers caressing just above your elbow, stops you in your tracks. a soft call of your name and the same gentle touch under your chin draws your attention back up towards the man that holds your very heart and doesn’t know it. 
“there’s nothing for you to apologize for.” he uses a tone you’ve heard him use with the lower class soldiers, one with an unswaying conviction, leaving no room for doubt or question but with you it’s so unbelievably tender and considerate. “you don’t need to be sorry for other people's actions. i wouldn’t have agreed to the contest if i wasn’t okay with how strange someone may act around me.” he takes a step closer to you and in the same movement your hands reach for him, holding onto his coat that lingers with the same heat as his hands and as if to assure you that it’s okay, his own touch grows a bit bolder. the fingers under your chin glide along your skin beside your mouth and up to your cheek with the weight of a feather, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear and lingering there. “the contest was a great idea. you wished to help lift the spirits of others,” he smiles then, “that’s a wonderful thing.”
“b- but, what about you?” you don’t know how you spoke the words, your chest felt so weightless and yet so full. so full of sephiroth, the scent of leather and flora and the warmness of his body.
“i’m more than alright.” he sounds so sure as he closes the last bit of the distance between you, pulling you against him in a sweet embrace that allows you to wrap your arms around his slim waist before he pulls you flush against his massive and muscular body and after a silent moment whispers against the crown of your head, his voice vulnerable and soft, tugging at your heart strings and making you pull him closer still. “thank you for thinking of my comfort. not many have before.���
“i’ll do better next time,” you mumble into his chest, another apology on the tip of your tongue but before the words come out, with his strong arm still wrapped around you, sephiroth squeezes you lightly.
“you’ve already done so much. more than anyone.”
he lets go of you all too quickly, as if it was urgent that he do so and it leaves you in a dizzying spell that you want to melt into and chase after. as you blink and he clears his throat, it starts to clear, you find your bearings and can barely hear his next words over the sound of your thundering heart, asking again if you are okay.
“yeah, i’m okay,” and you mean it despite the earlier whirlwind of your emotions. but he has always had this effect on you, everything felt okay when he was around and when he held you it was like nothing else mattered.
sephiroth lets out an audible sigh of relief, like he had truly been worried you weren’t. “good, i’m glad.”
before you can stop your lips from moving, you ask what’s on the front of your mind out loud, much to your horror. “genesis didn’t say something did he?”
that adorably quizzically look tugs at his features once more. “should he have?”
“no, not at all!” you try to brush it off quickly, even if he had would you really want to hear more about how jealous you came off earlier? what would sephiroth think if he knew..? you can’t think about it right now when he’s standing right in front of you with your face burning and you can’t meet his eyes. “i was just - don’t mind me.” 
“as long as you’re okay.”
“i am,” you assure him with a sweet, genuine smile. how could you not be okay with him here with you, checking on you, smiling back at you? the jealousy you felt feels a bit foolish now. genesis was right, it didn’t mean anything but this.. this felt like it meant something, even if it was just to you. “thanks for checking on me.”
“i’ll let you get inside then.”
“okay..” you didn’t want him to go but hold back your wishes for him to stay. “get home safe seph.”
“sleep well.”
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧
it took nearly all of sephiroths strength to pull away from your embrace and somehow even more strength to refrain from running up the stairs back to your 20th floor apartment after he had made it outside of the building and took the first few steps back towards sector 0 and the soldier barracks. 
somehow so much and not enough.. he wanted to be greedy, to hold you forever, call you his, accept your loving nature even if he was far from a man who deserved it. but tonight this would have to be enough, the searing of his skin everywhere you had touched him, the remembrance of how small and delicate you felt in his arms and the near painful longing to do it again alongside the overwhelming feeling of being cared for by you.
he’s no stranger to your kindness and thoughtfulness but it’s so foreign to him all the same. 
the touch of others is all too familiar to him, and in worse ways than that of the winner of the contest today. it was something he learned to ignore, tune out, numb, but your touch was like being branded by the stars and cradled by the curve of the moon. every accidental swipe of your hands sending electricity through his entire body and the few times he had been bold enough to hold you left him basking in your warmth and gentleness and utterly aching when it was torn from him.
sephiroth feels it all over and over again on his walk back to the barracks and it snaps more of the strings on the leash of his feelings for you. it is getting so hard to hold back and today when it felt like you had been so far away, avoiding him, upset with him somehow, he could hardly stand it. 
his worries are at least quelled for now and after your interaction he’s left with more emotions than he knows what to do with besides let them fill his chest and wrap around his heart. he can feel the heat of his cheeks lingering all the way through the shinra lobby and into the elevator.
should he tell you how he feels? could he handle the consequences of losing the only comfort in his life if you couldn’t return his feelings? could you love a man like him, someone who didn’t think they were even capable or deserving of this kind of love but wants to try for you, to give you everything and more.. for he would give you everything, even himself if you asked.
unusual for this late hour, the elevator stops on one of the soldier floors, stopping his thoughts and when sephiroth looks up, he sees a tired genesis step inside.
“late night?” he asks, a teasing lilt to his tone.
with a roll of his eyes, genesis replies, “it’s all thanks to you, hero.”
the first question sephiroth asks is if this is about you.
genesis only groans, “goddess help you both.”
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lostalioth · 8 months
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𝐬𝐨𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐝
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→ premise: he only intended to check on you you, he didn’t however plan on you exacting your revenge for him throwing you in the pool at that very moment. though it works out in the end to finally break the thick lingering tension between you two.
→ pairing: s1!steve harrington x fem!reader
→ warnings: 2.3k words, smut | 18+, unprotected sex, shower sex, fingering, edging, semi-drunk sex, underaged drinking they are described as drinking but they are a bit drunk/tipsy, season 1 steve harrington and so tommy and carol are in it, Y/N IS USED ONCE, nicknames [baby, cutie], description of wet clothes
→ a/n: 05 kinktober
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“Ahhh Steve noo please!” You squeal and heat washes over your body, your skin burns where Steve's hands are gripping your waist. His touch sends butterflies to start violently fluttering in your stomach. He lifts you up and you feel like the air is punched from your lungs at the strength and his hands all over you. You hear a chuckle eurrupt from his chest right before you’re thrown from his hands. You squeal as your body breaks the frozen barrier of water and you splash into the icey grimy pool. You hold your breath as you look up from under the water and see the stars sparkle in the night sky. Slowly you come up out of the water, pushing your body up on the side of the pool glaring in Harrington's direction. The cold water is working to sober you up a bit, however not as well as you wished it to. The alcohol still streaming through your veins from those last few swings of the bottle now making you only a tad bit tipsy. Tommy and Carol are keeled over laughing, nearly falling off the lawn chairs they were laid out on. “Before you kill me you're gonna need me for new clothes you know? Right?” Steve lightly whines and backs up looking like a deer in headlights as he backs himself up against the sliding patio door.
“Show me where the shower is in this damn mansion of a house and maybe just maybe I'll spare you” you groan and look down at your body as your clothes sag and cling awkwardly to your body, water dripping off of you and onto the patio tile below you making you feel like a wet dog. He slides the glass back door open quickly and waits on you, not daring to make a move. “You're so whipped Harrington, how can you deny that?!?” Tommy calls over at the boy whose frozen stood, making Carol burst out into laughter again. You and Steve glare in their direction as you make your way into the much warmer house.
They shut up and put up their hands in surrender and shrug as you and Steve walk into the house. He leads you up the stairs and points you towards his bathroom. You give him a grimace before you walk into the bathroom, you decide not to lock the door and even to leave it open a crack.
Steve gathers clothes of his own for you to change into as he hears shuffling in the bathroom before the water starts running. He grabs a baggy pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt of his as well as socks of his for you. He walks a few feet out of his bedroom, passing the cracked open bathroom door. The smell of his body wash wafts out the door and under his nose. You were using his body wash, and you were gonna smell all like him and be wearing his clothes. He feels his cock stir and twitch in his suddenly ill-fitting boxers at the thought, god it made his stomach turn. It would be like you were his, all his, only his. He shakes away the cloud of lust overcoming him and makes his way into the laundry room. Opening up the dryer he throws in the clothes he grabbed as well as a towel for you, setting it to run for around 10 minutes so that it all comes out warm. It might appear as though he was sucking up cause he doesn't want you to kill him for throwing you in the pool, but he does genuinely want you to be comfortable and warm. He let Carol and Tommy get the better of him and get in his head, always calling him whipped for you and saying he follows you around like a puppy. The two of you weren’t together in any capacity besides friends and it kills Steve. Cause he knows he's very obvious with his affection and infatuation and yet he's oblivious to yours. Therefore him throwing you in the pool was so they'd stop their comments about how close you two were sitting or how he was looking at you. He shouldn't have let them get to him but that was all he could think to do so they’d shut up.
Making his way back into his bedroom he stands frozen in front of the bathroom door, hand wrapped around the side where it was left open a jar. He takes a deep breath and walks in, looking down at his feet. His intentions were purely innocent and yet he couldn't fight the flush of his cheeks or the growing bulge making a small tent in his jeans as he stood there. This was his bathroom after all and so he knew his shower doors were glass and if he just looked up just an inch. He’d see your beautiful silhouette through the fogged up glass door, your hands running over your body as you rinse off the body wash. his body wash. Steve clears his throat to both catch your attention and regain his own composure enough to speak again.
“Hey uh i grabbed out some sweats and a shirt for you, even a pair of my socks, they're in the dryer with your towel so they can be toasty for ya’ i thought maybe i could take your sopping wet clothes from you to wash those” the words all practically come vomiting out of Steve's mouth in a hurry he was doing his best to make up for his adolescent action. The strain of his aching cock against his jeans persistent and annoying however.
It was killing him, knowing if he only glanced up just a bit he could see your body in all its beauty and yet he wouldn't, he couldn't. He wasn't a perv though it may seem like it sometimes, he just felt the need to check in on you, you were tipsy still and not at your own house after all.
With Steve's head bowed and his eyes apparently glued to his own feet he misses the small evil smirk that spreads on your face. “Yeah yeah that'd be great Steve thank-” you cut yourself off and let out a small fustrated string of curuses before you fake whine.
“Y/N? What happened, hey you okay?” A confused Steve stands even more frozen but he's gotten closer to the shower door and has a hand on the door handle. “Oh fuck- ughh i think i got soap in my eye. I can't tell if I rinsed it all away. Can you look at my eye for me please?” You question and fight back the smile that wants to take over your lips, forcing a squinted and pained expression instead.
Without a second thought Steve flings the shower door open, eyes now glued to your face instead of the floor and his feet. He leans forward trying to get a better look in your eye when you grab him by the collar of his shirt. Quickly before he can question you, you pull Steve into the shower with you, sliding closed the door so no water escapes.
The warm water suddenly spraying at his back, soaking his shirt and running down, working its way to soaking his jeans. His jaw agape and his shoulders raised and tense for a moment before he adjusts and they drop. His already tight jeans are beginning to cling around his now very obvious bulge. “Alright yeah I deserved thattt-” he chuckles but his voice gets caught in his throat and his last word dragging on when he lets his eyes drift down your bare, dripping, glowing wet body standing in front of him. You watch as his brown eyes darken and cloud with desire, your own eyes slowly taking in his own body and landing right on his excruciatingly hard cock that's begging to be let out of his strained jeans. Your own eyes glaze over with lust and reluctantly they scan back up Steve's body to meet his. His eyes droopy and brows furrowed, strands of his brown locks now soaked and a darker color as they stick to his forehead jaw still practically on the floor.
“Steve.. please” you whine, your voice coming out more breathless than you intended and full of vulnerability. “Oh fuck it” he grunts and surges forward, his warm hands wrapping around your slippery wasit pulling your exposed body flush against his colthed one as his lips crash against yours.
You let out a small gasp and shut your eyes tightly before kissing back passionately, lips molding together perfectly as hands roam and slide around each other's drenched bodies. Steve’s hand slips up your side, around your back and up your spine slowly before gripping the back of your neck deepening the kiss. You hum into his mouth and let his tongue invade your own mouth and take over dancing with your tongue. His other hand sliping the opposite way, down your hip and over your soft thigh before cupping your throbbing sex. A whimper escapes your lips, the steam from your hot shower filling the bathroom only seemed to double, surrounding the fogged up shower as well as your and Steve's entangled bodies. “Harrington..baby i need you please” you pull away from the heated kiss and whine leaning into his touch, your hands splayed across his lower stomach. One sliding under his soaked shirt and the other sliding down and starting to work at the button on his pants. The running shower head is still spraying right at Steve's back who's too entranced with you to care about the water bill that's raising higher and higher to longer it runs uselessly.
A cocky smirk is plastered on Steve’s face as water flows down his chiseled face and drips off his chin. His nibble fingers slide through your folds and slip through your slick before plunging deep inside you. His middle and ring finger work in tandem to thrust inside your aching cunt and reach that spongy spot that makes you see stars. Your pussy clenches around his fingers after every thrust inside, his long fingers buried knuckle deep inside you. You let out a loud wanton moan in relief and pleasure that gets muffled when Steve's lips collide with your own once again. You finish unbuttoning his jeans and do your best to push the fabric as well as his boxers down his thick thighs as they cling to his legs. His neglected cock finally springing free, his leaking red tip angry and desperate for attention.
All the tension and Steve's fast and well trained movements make the pleasure build up fast in the pit of your stomach. You moan and whimper into his mouth as his fingers keep thrusting hard and deep inside you, Steve’s thumb starting to rub slow circles on your twitching clit pushing you closer and closer to that edge. “You gonna cum on my fingers cutie?” His voice comes out taunting and condensing, the sound rebervating against the tile walls in the shower and bouncing all around you. You nod frantically and your knees buckle, your legs almost giving out from under you. Steve uses the hand gripping the back of your neck to make you hold eye contact as well as hold your body up steady as you grow limper in his arms the closer you get.
“Well you know how our little game goes right baby? Well you pulled me in the shower for throwing you in the pool” he starts explaining and you fight your eyes fluttering shut and your thoughts drifting away as you get closer and closer to tipping over the edge. You lazily nod in understanding. “Yes baby yes Steve I know i know!” You babble and moan out nearly incoherently as your eyes shut for a second but snap back open. Your cunt begins to throb and ache for releasing and holding it in starts to become painful. “Well it's my turn again and i think i'm gonna edge you cutie you know, for pay back?” He chuckles and as quickly as he slipped them in he pulls his fingers out of you, leaving you empty. Your pussy clenches around nothing and you let out a long whine in protest as your head falls back and your climax dies back down.
A shit eating grin is glued to Harrington's face and he soothes the pain by circling your clit with the two fingers he slipped out softly. Your disappointment doesn't last long however once Steve grabs both of your arms, pulling them behind your back and spinning your body around to press your tits up against the cold shower wall. Your hips nestled and pressed against his, his cock sliding through your folds as he grinds against your ass. Your nipples harden from the shift in temperature from the shower water. The hand that isn't holding both of your arms behind your back comes down to slap your ass before Steve's tip spilling pre cum is pushing at your entrance and with one hard sharp thrust he's inside.
“Oh god~ Baby” you scream as Steve gives you no time to adjust to his size, the painful sting of your cunt stretching and accommodating his cock. He rubs his thumb over the small of your back as he pushes your arms flush to your back keeping your body right where he wants you. Steve thrusts deep and fast, desperately needing this feeling for so long he can't get enough. The sound of your moans and mumbled curses, sweet nothings and whines of ‘baby’ ‘more’ ‘yes!’ fill the room alongside the slapping sound of wet skin against wet skin. Steve's balls slap against your clit in this position adding to your pleasure. You let out a loud scream of pleasure the harder he thrusts, your climax right on the edge faster than you wished. Your hips slam back against Steves and any thought of being mad at him for throwing you in the freezing cold pool have long dissipated along with the steam in the bathroom and long forgotten about with the running dryer with your towel and Steve's clothes.
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→ a/n: i got very carried away with this and it took two days to finish so it came out late and im sorry but im actually pretty proud of this one. fun enough this was sort of an idea carried over from last years kinktober that i didnt do and now finally i did it!! leave me feedback and sorry for any typos!
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munsons-maiden · 2 years
Text
𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐄𝐥𝐬𝐞 𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬
Here’s a smutty little oneshot while I’m working on the next chapter of Worlds Apart. I hope you enjoy! - Love, Kiki  ♡  
𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 |  Eddie Munson x female cheerleader!reader (virgin!Eddie x virgin!reader)
𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 | It’s been two weeks since you and Eddie decided to stop sneaking around and start behaving like every other couple at Hawkins High. Only that you’re not. And after overhearing a group of cheerleaders’ especially cruel gossip about your relationship, Eddie’s insecurities, nourished by all those years of bullying, hit home despite all of his attempts not to let people’s vile words get to him. This time though...he feels like they might be right. Because why would a girl like you ever fall for a guy like him? And when Eddie realizes he made a mistake...he can only hope it’s not too late to fix what he broke. Based on this request: Maybe one where reader is a cheerleader and popular but only wants to be  with eddie but he is insecure because he's the school freak and  overhears mean gossip? Angst w a happy ending?
𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭 | angst with a happy ending; soft, sweet smut; virgin!Eddie x virgin!reader; insecure Eddie; a Pride-And-Prejudice-style confession in the rain  
𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 | 11k  
𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 | SMUT (only read if you’re 18+ years old!), unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it!), p in v
𝐅𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐄𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭, 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭.  
𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐬, 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 & 𝐫𝐞𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐝, 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 ♡
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Eddie hadn’t wanted to eavesdrop. He truly hadn’t.
But he’d heard your name, and then his own, and now he was standing here, around the corner in the empty hallway, forced to listen to the voices of the three cheerleaders and the ugly things they were saying about you and him. He couldn’t muster the mental strength required to walk past them now and face their scrutiny.
He was a rat in a trap.
“…nearly got a heart attack when I saw her jump out of that rusty old van of his last week,” one of them remarked, “Like, I can’t wrap my head around the thought that they’re dating. Barf me out, that’s disgusting.”
“She’s probably just pitying that freak, anyways, and doesn’t know how to get rid of him. Like one of these flea-infested strays you feed one time and they’ll start following you around. He looks like one of these as well.” Eddie didn’t need to see her face to know she was scrunching her nose in disgust. He was used to that kind of reaction. “Oh god, do you think she’ll bring him if I invite her to my Spring Break party?”
“You probably shouldn’t risk it.”
“Probably. I’m a bit sorry for her, though.”
“Why? It’s on her if she’s screwing around with the scum. I always thought she’d end up with Steve Harrington, to be honest. They would’ve been such a cute couple before he graduated.”
“Don’t they always hang around?”
“I mean, yeah. As far as I know. She says they’re just friends but can you imagine rejecting Steve Harrington to end up with Eddie The Freak Munson?”
There was a beat of affirmative silence, before the second girl said, “I don’t get what she sees in that creep.”
“Maybe she fucks him to get a drug discount.”
“Or maybe he’s got some hidden talents,” the third girl jested.
Eddie could nearly feel how she was grimacing with disgust. It was dripping from her voice like poison.
“A freak in the streets and in the sheets?”
“Urgh, stop it!”, the first one giggled, “Don’t make me imagine it. I wanna scrub my eyes with bleach.”
“He probably always fucks her from behind so she won’t have to see his ugly face.”
There was a fit of giggles mingling with the sound of a locker door being slammed shut, before they finally left. Their footsteps were echoing through the silence that settled over the hallway as they walked away in the other direction, clearing Eddie’s path to the exit – but he was frozen in place.
His back against the wall, he let his head fall so his messy curls would hide the stray tear that was rolling down his cheek, as he squeezed his eyes shut to fight the feeling of nausea in his guts while the cheerleaders’ voices rang in his mind, like a broken record, playing their cruel words on repeat.
She’s probably just pitying that freak, anyways, and doesn’t know how to get rid of him.
I always thought she’d end up with Steve Harrington, to be honest.
He probably always fucks her from behind so she won’t have to see his ugly face.
It had been two weeks. Two weeks since the two of you had decided to stop sneaking around and act like every other couple at Hawkins High.
The news of one of the cheerleaders dating Eddie The Freak had spread like a forest fire when the two of you had walked into the cafeteria together, hand in hand.
Eddie had known it would cause trouble – he just hadn’t anticipated how much the whispers and vile comments would hurt him. He was used to them, had been used to them as long as he could remember.
He was used to being eyed warily, glared at, picked upon and bullied because he was different, and he’d started wearing being different like a shield.
What hurt him was how people had started talking about you.
And the fact that Eddie knew, deep down…that they were right. That you deserved someone better than him.
Someone you could bring to parties and kiss in the hallways without being laughed at or shamed for it. Someone who played basketball instead of D&D, who wouldn’t graduate at his third attempt. Someone who looked like Steve Harrington, not like himself.
Someone who wasn’t a freak.
***
You’d known something was wrong when Eddie hadn’t shown up at your place for movie night as he usually did every Friday evening.
And when you’d sought him in the hallway the following Monday before classes, he hadn’t even looked at you before darting off in the other direction.
But if you were being totally honest with yourself…something had been wrong ever since you’d stopped hiding your relationship from the shark tank that was Hawkins High.
Things with Eddie had started out perfectly, all these months ago. The perfect love story, like the ones found on TV and between the pages of sappy romance novels.
Your craving for a chocolate milkshake and Eddie’s hunger for fries had led to a chance encounter at Benny’s Diner in the middle of a Saturday night a few months ago, and the night had ended with the two of you sharing milkshakes and fries until the good-natured but tired Benny had kicked you out by closing time at three in the morning.
When you’d parted ways in the parking lot with smiles as bright as the full moon in the skies above, the unspoken agreement had been struck to repeat whatever had happened that night. And one week later, when you’d shown up at the diner again, this time in the hopes not for a milkshake but the metalhead you’d always simply known as Eddie The Freak…Eddie had been there already, waiting for you with one of his dazzling grins and the confession that he’d hoped you’d show up again.
Benny’s diner became a sanctuary, and the milk-shake-and-fries-dates with Eddie an unspoken agreement. Away from the halls of Hawkins High where people would have stared, gossiped, about a cheerleader and the Freak talking, laughing together – when talking to Eddie and laughing with him felt like the most natural thing in the world. Like breathing. With Eddie, you realized that the corset you’d strapped yourself in could be loosened. Allowing you, for the first time in years, to actually breathe. To be yourself, just like he was, without saying something wrong, being judged. With Eddie, sharing fries and milkshakes at Benny’s little dinner under the cover of Saturday night when there was no danger of bumping into anyone at school because they were all busy partying, you felt more like yourself than you had in a very long time.
And the Saturday night diner dates had morphed into lunchbreaks spent in the shadow of the bleachers or on the little clearing in the woods behind the sports field, hidden from prying eyes; into movie nights and hikes through the woods until one clear, cold night three months ago, Eddie had finally kissed you underneath the starry night sky outside of The Hideout after one of his gigs, his skin soaked with sweat and his voice hoarse from singing and playing the guitar all night. It had been the picture-perfect first kiss.
And one single kiss had turned into many.
Stolen kisses in empty classrooms, fleeting touches and lingering glances in the hallways whenever the two of you passed by each other, heated make-out sessions on the couch of the trailer he shared with his uncle.
And the crush you’d been harboring for Eddie had turned into so, so much more.
Into love.
Not that giddy kind of infatuation of High School sweethearts, but actual love. The kind of love that had you plan your future together, far away from shallow-minded little Hawkins and its gossips.
But where movies and romance novels ended…real life went on.
It wasn’t enough anymore to share stolen kisses when nobody was looking, to see each other every day in class, the cafeteria, the hallways, so close yet parted by that invisible line neither of you had known how to cross – because as soon as the two of you set foot into Hawkins High, you were still a cheerleader. And Eddie was still The Freak.
Until, two weeks ago, the two of you had decided to end the secrecy and behave like every other couple at Hawkins High did.
You’d been prepared for the havoc the two of you would cause, the stares and whispers and bullying, but…you’d been tired of hiding. And you’d thought Eddie had been, too. That he was secretly scared you were ashamed of being with him, when all you wanted to do was shout it from the rooftops that you were in love with Eddie Munson.
That the reason Eddie had never made a move towards Third Base – and had gallantly thwarted all of your attempts to change that fact – had been rooted not only in his genuinely sweet, gentlemanly manners, but a deeper-rooted hurt about you still keeping your relationship hidden.  
But now, two weeks later, it was obvious that something was wrong.
Eddie was avoiding you. And with every step you tried to take to close this strange new distance between the two of you, it felt like he took three steps backwards. Away from you.
By the time Friday had arrived, the vague sense of doom which had started to grow in your chest over the past two weeks had grown into fully-fledged panic.
And you finally had enough of Eddie’s dancing around you.
It was a game day, the whole of Hawkins High a sea of orange and green as everyone sported the school’s colors in anticipation of the basketball game which would take place that evening. Everyone, except for the members of the Hellfire Club, you noticed with a small smile as you entered the cafeteria for lunch break. They’d donned their matching Hellfire shirts for their own game that night, the ones Eddie had designed a few months ago, on a paper napkin at Benny’s Diner.
With his messy dark curls long enough to brush his shoulders, the ripped jeans, the leather jacket and denim vest and rings, the tattoos decorating his skin, Eddie Munson always stuck out in a crowd – but today, in the sea of green and orange – from shirts to scrunchies, from banners to ribbons – he stuck out like a black swan in a pond full of white ones as he was lounging in his usual place at the head of the Hellfire Club’s table. The smile on your lips widened at the sight of him, gesticulating as he replied to something Mike had said. But the giddy feeling in your chest died and withered as realization crept back in that he’d been avoiding you the whole week. The whole past two weeks.
A group of sophomore girls walked past you, a few of them glancing at your cheerleader uniform with various expressions of timidness and awe, and you gave them a little smile as they passed.
Ever since you’d started dating Eddie, most people had stopped throwing you awning gazes and shy smiles in the hallways. Instead, there were now whispers trailing in your wake; some more hurtful than others, but that’s what you’d expected.
Four more months, and you were out of here. You both would be. Rid of ugly whispers and disgusted glances, of people treating you as if the stain dating Eddie The Freak Munson had left on your reputation was an infectious disease.
It hurt. Not because you cared what people thought about you – but because nobody outside of Hellfire seemed to see Eddie the way you did. They couldn’t look past the tattoos, the ripped denim and leather, the unkempt exterior, to see the heart of gold, all the sweetness and kindness underneath that shone from every single one of his radiant smiles.
The smile, though, was wiped from Eddie’s face as you walked towards the Hellfire Club table, the usual exhilarated mood at the table snuffed out like sunlight covered by rainclouds – the same rain clouds dimming the light in Eddie’s eyes when his gaze met yours.
It felt like a knife being plunged into your chest.
You’d hoped for him to give you one of his dazzling smiles when his eyes landed on you, to jump up and kiss you and whirl you around like he always did, but he stayed frozen in place, still as one of his D&D figurines as he watched you approach with a mix of surprise and…something else. Something you couldn’t quite decipher. It scared you.
The silence which had settled over the Hellfire Club’s table seemed to grow more tense when you came to stand beside Eddie, your weary smile into the group, at Gareth and Jeff and Dustin and Mike, answered by uneasy sideways glances flitting between you and Eddie, whose expression had turned into an unreadable mask so unlike him it hurt.
“Eddie, can we talk?”, you said quietly, fiddling with the hem of your cheerleader skirt just to give your hands something to do.
Eddie didn’t even look at you as you uttered the words. His eyes scanned the assembled crowd in the cafeteria, the sideways glances thrown your way, before he said, “Yeah. Sure. Outside?”
Up until now, there had been this tiny sliver of hope that it had all been a misunderstanding. That all your deep, dark fears of losing Eddie, nourished by these past days of sudden radio silence until the tender saplings of anxiety had grown into weeds threatening to suffocate you from within, were irrational, that Eddie’s sudden distance could be rooted in a harmless, reasonable explanation. A misunderstanding.
That if you called him out on it, it would turn out you’d just been paranoid. But judging by his reaction now, it was obvious that wasn’t the case.
Your heart seemed to cease its beating, to freeze over and plummet to the floor all at the same time as, like caught in a trance, you followed Eddie out of the cafeteria and into the silence of the abandoned hallway outside. He didn’t take your hand like he usually did. Didn’t press a delicate kiss to your cheek or your knuckles, didn’t play with the green satin ribbon in your hair matching the cheerleader uniform. Didn’t pull you into a spontaneous little dance, twirling you until your head was spinning and tears of laughter ran down your face.
The air between the two of you was frozen like Lover’s Lake in December when he came to a halt, the silence of the abandoned corridor around you suffocating as Eddie finally turned to face you. It was strange, so utterly unfamiliar to see that there was not a single spark of the usual humor, the usual gentle warmth in his dark eyes as he looked at you now.
“Shouldn’t you be at cheerleader training rehearsing for the game?”, he asked, his voice as hollow as his gaze.
“There are more important things than cheerleader training,” you began, voice softening as you took a tentative step closer to him and added, “Eddie, talk to me. Please. You’ve been avoiding me for two weeks now. And…and I need to know what’s wrong.”
The way Eddie shrunk back from you when you reached out to grasp his hand hit you like a punch to the gut.
“Did I do something wrong?”, you said quietly, letting your hand fall to your side.
Something in your voice, in your eyes, though, snapped Eddie out of this strange detached state, and with a shaky sigh, he pinched the bridge of his nose, eyes squeezed shut as if he was in pain.
And it dawned on you that you’d already lost him.
“I’m…I’m sorry,” he breathed, his own voice choked with emotions, “But this doesn’t work.”
“What –“
“This,” he exclaimed, waving at the space between the two of you, “It doesn’t work. You’re a cheerleader, and I’m a freak. And I’m tired of playing pretend.”
“Don’t,” you said quietly, voice strained to its breaking point with the lump that was forming in your throat, the tears stinging in your eyes and threatening to spill because you knew, could feel where this conversation was heading. It felt like being strapped to a train hurtling towards a glaring abyss. “Don’t call yourself that, Eddie.”
“But it’s true. I’m a freak. And avoiding to say it doesn’t change it. I’m tired of pretending I could be more than the guy tagging along with you through a little phase of rebellion before you tire of him and settle down with one of the Steve Harringtons of this world.” He drew out Steve’s name into a lilt, his voice dripping with disdain.
You reeled back. “Tell me that’s not what you think.”
“It’s what I know.”
Anger started rising in your chest now, mingling with the panic and pain already churning there like a maelstrom threatening to drag you under.
“What you know,” you echoed, voice trembling. “When did I ever give you a reason to believe that, Eddie? When?”
“You’re a cheerleader.” The way he said it, as if that was all there was to you…it made you sick.
“So, a pair of pompoms and a short skirt determine my personality? You, of all people, should know not to judge a book by its cover. And especially not a book you’ve already read.” It came out as a whisper as you tried to swallow back the tears.
“That’s…that’s not what I’m saying.”
“Then what are you saying, Eddie?”
Don’t. Please don’t do this.
Your tongue couldn’t form the desperate plea your heart was screaming at him.
With his voice so uncharacteristically quiet and detached, Eddie said, “I’m saying good-bye.”
There was a shellshocked daze clouding your senses as your body went numb, the sensation spreading from your chest to your fingertips as you waited to wake up with sweat-soaked sheets tangled around your legs and the relief of knowing this, right now, had just been a horrible dream and that Eddie would be waiting at your front door to pick you up for school with that beautiful smile on his lips.
The shrill sound of the bell piercing the silence of the hallways to announce the end of lunch break was dulled in your ears, a scratch at the edge of your perception.
It was curious, how the shattering of a heart didn’t make a single sound when it could be felt so clearly, caused a pain that ran deeper than any blade could pierce.
There was no time for you to react, to beg him to tell you what had happened in the span of a few days to end things like this.
The hallways flooded with people leaving the cafeteria for their afternoon classes, and Eddie was gone.
Walking away down the hallway, the familiar sight of the DIO patch on his denim vest and dark curls fading into the sea of orange and green as he walked away from you.
Just like that.
***
You didn’t remember how you’d gotten to the bathroom, or how long you’d been cowering in the stall, on the dirty, grimy tiles, hugging your knees as sobs ripped through you, the numbness in your body fading as pain took over.
Real, physical pain in your chest, as if your heart had actually shattered into a million tiny shards that were now scraping at your insides, tearing you open while the damn tears wouldn’t stop falling.
Eddie was your first love, your first everything.
And part of you had always – foolishly – clung to the belief that things would always stay that way. That Eddie Munson wouldn’t be your first heartbreak, too. That the plans you’d made for the future would become reality.
You couldn’t figure out what had happened.
Did it even matter, if something had happened? Was that better than Eddie simply falling out of love?
***
“You’re a fucking idiot.”
Eddie’s head snapped up at the sudden sound, and a sigh escaped him as he saw Dustin, hands on his hips as he was standing in the doorway to the room Hellfire shared with the theatre club. The boy’s expression in the shadow of his cap was a mix of shock and anger.
“You’re not even going to argue?”, Dustin challenged.
“Would you go away if I did?”, Eddie replied. His voice was meek and coarse from crying. He was tired. So fucking tired and miserable.
“I won’t go anyway. I heard what you said to her.”
“You spied on me?”
“A High School hallway isn’t exactly a place for private conversation,” Dustin quipped, locking his hands in front of his chest now. The kid definitely needed to get his ego in check.
“Dustin –“ Eddie began, but the boy was already stalking towards him with a grim determination on his face as he said, “No. Let me speak. I’m pretty sure you already know what I’m about to say. Hear me out. You’re a fucking fool. You know why? The sweetest, prettiest girl of Hawkins High gave you her heart, and you threw it away because you’re so deep in your little bubble of moping and whining…about what? That she obviously loves you?”
“She never said that.”
Dustin threw his hands in the air, clearly exasperated now. “Did you? Did you ever say it to her?”
There was a pause as Eddie stared at Dustin, before the boy went on, “That’s what I thought. Why do you think she loves you, huh? For your popularity? Your good grades? Your flowery smell?”
“I get it Henderson, thank you. No need to rub it in.”
“No, you don’t get it and that’s the problem. Are you a Jason Carver? A Patrick McKinney? A Steve Harrington? No!”
“I’m already literally on the floor already,” Eddie said quietly, lacking the strength to even feel indignant, “Why do you keep kicking me, kid?”
“You’re an Eddie. And that’s your selling point! The girl took a single look at you, in all your weird glory, all revved up and jumping tables and selling drugs –“
“Wait, how do you –“
“You carry that stuff around in your lunchbox. Do you think she didn’t know there would be gossip and bullying? She did, of course she did! Yet she took one look at you, at Eddie The Freak, and decided you were worth all that trouble.”
“You don’t even know what happened,” Eddie muttered, raking a trembling hand through his curls. “You don’t know what people are saying –“
“You’re the one who taught me to not be bullied into giving up what I love and now you’re sitting here, hiding and moping around after doing exactly that. You threw her away like the notes for a failed D&D campaign. Or did you really think you were letting her go because you’re such a hero? You’re not a hero, you’re a coward. You’re running away. And while it’s okay to run away from danger or graduation or whatever, it’s really fucking stupid to run away from someone who loves you.” Dustin paused, letting his words sink in, before he added, “If I were you, I’d be on my knees and begging for her to forgive your utter and devastating stupidity and take you back. So…” Dustin cleared his throat, straightening his spine as he stared down at Eddie, who was still miserably cowering amid the scenery for the theatre club’s next piece, “Eddie The Freak. Get up from the floor, wipe your eyes, blow your nose, and get your girl back.”
With these words still hanging in the air, Dustin turned to leave, but Eddie’s voice rang out to hold him back.
“Henderson. Wait.”
Dustin turned, watching as Eddie slowly climbed back to his feet. Taking a steadying breath, he righted his leather jacket and he raised his chin, before he announced, “You need to tell the others that Hellfire’s cancelled tonight.”
“Wa –“
“There’s a goddamn important balls-and-laundry-baskets game I need to attend.”
Eddie could only hope it wasn’t too late already.
***
You’d never been so miserable in your life like you felt right now, dancing and jumping and smiling that wide fake smile as your muscles went through the movements of the choreography like a sleepwalker.
The cheers and voices in the gym blurred like the faces around you as every second made it harder to fight back the tears threatening to spill all over again.
You didn’t need to be a genius to know you were walking the flimsy tightrope over the abyss of a mental breakdown.
You only needed to get through the next two hours.
And then you could break down and cry your soul out.
Two hours.
“Watch your step!”, the hiss of one of the other cheerleaders tore you from your thoughts as you spun just in time to avoid bumping into her, your mind catching up with the steps of the choreography just in time to correct the little misstep and twirl – and time froze for a few heartbeats as your eyes locked on a pair of umber ones, staring back at you from the entrance to the gym.
He was standing in the shadow of the bleachers, hair tousled and hands shoved into the pockets of his ripped jeans as he watched you, the ghost of a sad little smile tugging at his lips that made him look like a lost puppy.
And despite all the hurt and heartbreak, despite the cruel things he’d said, your stupid little heart leapt in your chest like a bird in the confinements of its cage, ready to burst free and flutter right into his hands.
In the months since the two of you had started dating, Eddie Munson had never, not once, attended one of the “balls-and-laundry-baskets games” since they always took place on Fridays, at the same time as Hellfire Club, and it was sacrilegious to ever postpone Hellfire – but now here he was. And he was watching you the way only Eddie had ever looked at you. Not simply looking at you, but seeing you.
His gaze left that familiar prickling sensation in its wake on your skin you couldn’t get enough of as your surroundings blurred like watercolors because the only thing that mattered right then, the only thing that ever mattered, was that Eddie was here.
It took a few heartbeats for your senses to snap back to reality, for you to realize that the music had stopped and cheers rose all throughout the room as you struck the final pose, applause following as the cheerleaders of Hawkins High left the field to make room for the game which would start any minute now.
But as you walked with the others towards the spot at the edge of the field reserved for the cheerleaders, you couldn’t wait a single second longer.
You needed to know why Eddie was here.
A few of the other cheerleaders threw you dirty glances as you broke formation, pompoms still clutched in your hands, and raced along the bleachers towards the exit, heart racing and mind going a mile a minute.
But the blind spot between the exit and the bleachers was empty when you reached it. Eddie was gone.
The applause rising in the gym at your back rang in your ears in time with your racing heart as you darted out of the building and onto the parking lot.
Night had fallen already, and the soft drizzle from earlier had turned into a full-blown spring storm pelting down on you, biting the bare skin on your arms and legs as you squinted into the rain-soaked darkness, scanning the parking lot for the familiar sight of Eddie’s rusty old van.
It was still there, parked at the edge near the fence separating the premises of Hawkins High from that of the Middle School. Which meant Eddie was still around somewhere.
Not caring about the freezing rain, you raced towards the old van, weaving between the rows and rows of parked cars filling the for now abandoned space as the shrill noise of a whistle seeped out of the gym to fill the night, the noise of cheers, but you couldn’t care less about the game.
Just as you reached Eddie’s van, moving to squint through the driver’s side window to see if he was inside, someone called out your name. The voice was so beautifully familiar, the cadence like a melody you knew by heart, its soft lilt your favorite tune in the world as your heart soared and plummeted to the ground like a stone at the bottom of a well all at the same time.
You whirled around, coming face to face with Eddie.
He was absolutely soaked.
His mess of dark curls was plastered to his pale face in wet tangles, and rain was dripping into his face, running down his cheeks like tears as he held your gaze and stammered, “What are you doing? Shouldn’t you –“
“What are you doing?”, you cut him off. The words came out harsher than you’d intended for them to sound, but…you couldn’t help it.
He looked like a lost puppy as he watched you with those damn doe eyes, wide with a silent plea. “I didn’t want to interrupt, I just…I wanted to see you,” he replied quietly, “And that was stupid because you obviously don’t wanna see me right now, I get that, I really do. So, uh…I decided to just wait here until after the game and…talk to you.”
He’d started fiddling with the rings on his fingers. Like he always did when he was nervous.
“I thought you already said everything you needed to,” you said.
It was getting more difficult to hold back the tears with every second.
“Fuck,” Eddie breathed, rubbing a hand over his face, fingers carding through the rain-soaked curls plastered to his forehead – and it was the familiarity of this nervous little gesture that finally broke the dam.
The tears started falling down your face to mingle with the cold rainwater, and your vision blurred as Eddie cooed, sounding as desperate as you felt, “No, no, no, no, please don’t cry, sweeth- please don’t cry, okay?”
“What else am I supposed to do?!”, you shot back, your voice already breaking like your heart had.
You wiped your eyes with the back of your hands, the stupid pompoms you were still clutching tickling your face, before Eddie gently pried your hands away from your face, taking the pompoms from you so you could swipe at the tears and the rain on your cheeks.
The gesture was so tender, so Eddie, that the tears only started to fall harder.
“I was stupid”, Eddie breathed, eyes on yours, pleading, “Really goddamn fucking stupid. Because I got scared.”
“Of what?”, you whispered.
“Of this.” Eddie waved the pompoms between the two of you. Under different circumstances, it would have been hilarious, seeing Eddie the metalhead absolutely soaked like a cat that got lost in the rain gesture heatedly with a pair of wet pompoms.  
“Of…of not being enough,” he finished, taking a trembling breath that told you he was barely holding back his own tears. His bottom lip was trembling when he added, “I…I’ll wait here. Go back to your game and I’ll wait here and if you decide to hear me out – and I know I don’t deserve a single goddamn second more of your time but I’m begging you to grant it anyways – then I’ll be right here, ‘kay?”
The pouring rain was the only noise filling the deafening silence which settled over the two of you as Eddie waited for your reply.
And while your heart screamed at you to break the silence, to take his hand and tell him to never let you go again…your head told you not to.
He’d hurt you. He’d been the reason why you’d cried your heart out at the floor of the High School bathroom for the past few hours.
“I gave you my heart,” you whispered, “And you took it and smashed it on the floor of that fucking hallway. And then you left me there. Without any explanation. Just like that.”
It was hard to speak through the force of your tears choking you, the pouring rain all around drowning out your frail voice.
“Nothing has changed in the past hours, Eddie. I’m still a cheerleader. I’ve always been a cheerleader, and you’ve always been a freak. It was you who started to reduce us to that. It was you who made clear that I’ll be the one to break your heart while you were just doing the exact same thing with mine. That’s not fair. And I didn’t deserve that.”
And with tears falling down your face in hot rivulets that mingled with the cold rain, you turned to go back inside. You didn’t even have the strength to grab your pompoms back from him. It didn’t matter, you couldn’t go back to the game anyways, to cheering with a smile when you were soaked and freezing and numb and sobbing, with your breaking heart that was still screaming at you to stop and run back into his arms.
“I love you.”
Eddie’s words, spoken with such quiet fervor, froze you in your tracks.
“That night you walked into the diner for milkshakes and we first talked? It wasn’t just a lucky coincidence,” Eddie said, his voice nearly breaking underneath the force of his own emotions. “I…At the start of the school year, last summer, I got the bats tattoo.” You could hear the soft rustle of fabric as he raised his arm, clad in the sleeve of his leather jacket, but you didn’t have the strength to turn around yet, to look into those big brown eyes that would bring you to your knees.
“I doodled these bats on my chemistry homework a few days before that and I decided they looked metal so I got them tattooed and the next day in class – you were sitting beside me that day – you told me the bat tattoo was bitchin’,” Eddie went on. You didn’t need to see his face to know his own tears had started falling. “You told me that you’d seen me doodle them the other day and it was cool I got them tattooed and I was, like, a hundred percent sure you were poking fun of me. I waited for you to say something mean because that’s what people always do and you were a goddamn cheerleader and I was actually kinda scared out of my mind of you. But you didn’t mock me or laugh at me or call me a freak. You smiled. Really, genuinely smiled. And I never recovered from that.” He laughed; a low, disbelieving laugh as you felt your own tear-soaked smile tug at your lips as you remembered that day.
“I thought it was the most beautiful smile I’d ever seen,” Eddie continued, “Like sunshine. I started watching you after that day. At lunchbreak, class, in the hallways…it was so annoying. Because there was no way you’d ever talk to me again. Like, no way. Zero chance. But that grip you had on me ever since that day was insane. Like, you probably could have asked me to join the cheer squad and I wouldn’t have hesitated a single. Goddamn. Second. To put a ribbon in my hair and start cheering for Jason fucking Carver if you’d asked me to.”
His low, incredulous little laugh floated through the air.
Your favorite sound in the world.
And a broken little laugh ripped free from your own in response, mingling with more tears as your heart fluttered in your chest, with love and…hope.
“And when I saw your car in that diner’s parking lot six months ago,” Eddie went on, having a hard time speaking through his own tears, “I knew if I left that goddamn High School without shooting my shot and finally talking to you, I’d be the most stupid fucking dumbass in history. Going in there, walking up to you and saying hi was the one brave thing I ever did.”
Eddie paused, swallowing back his tears before he added, “And leaving you there in that cursed hallway today was the most stupid thing I ever did. So…I guess what I’m trying to say, what I’ve been trying to say for a while now but have been too chicken to actually say is…I love you, Y/N. I love you with all my cynical heart. And I’m sorry.”
In the rain-soaked silence that followed, you finally turned around to face him.
Eddie’s eyes, these beautiful dark eyes, were set on you, blinking against the rainwater running from his soaked hair and down his face, the tears in his eyes. He’d never looked so lost and desperate as he did right now, in the pouring rain, waiting for your reply.
“I was scared as well,” you said softly.
He tilted his head. “Of – of me?”
“You got a reputation as cult leader, satanist, freak and drug dealer. But you were always doodling stuff in your books and on your notes and I spent whole classes just watching you doodle. It always looked so cool. And I remember the day you doodled the Hellfire logo and showed up with the shirt a week later and I was so intrigued by that, the passion you put into the things you were doing. Drawing, D&D. Guitar. I saw you design your band’s logo as well. I felt like a weirdo, staring at you like that during classes,” you added with a soft chuckle, “But honestly, I couldn’t look away. You were sitting right in front of the window in Mrs. O’Donnell’s class, and the lighting always painted your hair in different shades. On rainy days it was ink-black, like the sharpie you used to draw. When it was sunny, it was all shades of chocolate. And you always smile when you’re drawing, that sweet small concentrated smile while you’re poking out your tongue. That was when I knew that the guy beside me in English Lit wasn’t the same menacing freak people made him out to be. And I was drawn in. And when I saw you got those bats tattooed, I shot my shot. You grinned, the most dazzling grin …and you never talked to me again until that night we met at Benny’s diner.”
For a heartbeat, there was only the pitter-patter of rain as you stared at each other, all the unspoken things hanging in the air between you until you finally broke underneath their weight.
“But what if you get scared again?”, you choked out. You weren’t sure Eddie would even hear your frail voice against the downpour of the rain pelting down on the asphalt, the parked cars, but he had.
The sad-looking, rain-soaked pompoms still clutched in his hands like a lifeline, Eddie sank down onto his knees, right in the middle of the parking lot in the pouring spring rain, utterly soaked and lost, and his eyes never left yours as he said, “Please, let me explain. Not rationalize, just…just explain. Five minutes. And then you can…you can leave, slap me, strangle me, whatever is it you wanna do.”
The sight of Eddie, kneeling on the wet asphalt of the parking lot, blinking against the rain that was dripping from the wet mess of his curls plastered to his face as he stared up at you, the plea in his huge dark eyes, the holding the soaked pompoms front of his chest…it was just so Eddie that the wave of affection overwhelmed you, stealing the words right off your tongue.
You gave him a curt nod, locking your arms in front of your chest as you waited for him to explain himself.
“In these two weeks since we stopped sneaking around, people have been horrible,” Eddie began. “It’s painted a target on your back. You never said anything about it but you didn’t need to because I know how most of the other cheerleaders have started treating you. That your friends stopped inviting you to parties…and the reason why you’re on this crashing downfall is me. And the thing is…maybe they’re right. Maybe I don’t deserve to be with you. Maybe I’ll never be good enough. Just…what do I have to give you? It’s my third attempt at goddamn graduation. Shit, I’m selling drugs. I’m a weirdo. And you…you’re beautiful, and kind, and you’re insanely clever. And…what kind of future do I have to give you, other than some tiny, crappy apartment and milkshakes at an even crappier diner for date night? You deserve someone who can give you all the fancy stuff in the world that you deserve. Someone you can kiss in public without people being disgusted. Someone who’s not me. Someone who’s not a freak.” There was so much venom in his voice as he spat that word, so much bitterness and disdain.
And just like that, everything made sense.
Eddie hadn’t left because he didn’t want to endure the bullying and gossip and whispers any longer.
He’d left because he actually believed them.
He believed that he wasn’t enough.
He believed the bullies, with their cruel jabs and their nicknames and their vile gossip, were right.
Because…if you’re being told the same thing over and over again, all your life…of course you start to believe it.
“God, Eddie,”, you breathed. “I’m…first of all, these people talking shit about us are not my friends. They’ve never been. You are. You’re my best friend in the world. And instead of just talking to me about the things bothering you, you just started to shut me out. No explanation, nothing. Because if you’d bothered to tell me about what’s going on with you, I could have told you that…that you’re all I want. That crappy little apartment with you is all I want. Milkshakes at some shitty diner are all I want. Because it’s with you. I don’t care about fancy stuff or gossips as long as the person beside me is you. Nothing else matters, and nothing else will ever matter. I love you, Eddie. And I’m sorry it’s so hard for you to see why.”
You’d crossed the distance between the two of you, standing right beside his van now.
There was a heartbeat of silence as the two of you stared at each other. Beneath the soaked strands of his hair, the dark chocolate brown of his curls turned into midnight black by the rain, Eddie’s dark eyes were brimming with tears as they rested on you.
“You…you love me?”, he breathed, his voice trembling, barely audible over the noise of the downpour.
He sounded incredulous. Bewildered.
It tore your heart to ribbons, to realize Eddie truly didn’t see how anyone could be in love with him when he deserved all the love in the world.
He must have seen the answer in your eyes already – because he didn’t wait for your reply.
Eddies hands came up to cradle your face before his lips crashed on yours in a kiss so desperate and fierce that it made the parking lot, the rain, the whole world around you blur as each and every one of your senses came alive to narrow in on Eddie.
On the feeling of his lips against yours, his thumbs brushing away the droplets of rain and tears streaming down your face as he gently angled your head to deepen the kiss, pressing closer while your fingers buried in the mess of his soaked curls at the nape of his neck to draw the softest of moans from his throat.
“I’m sorry,” Eddie breathed into the kiss, his lips chasing yours, “I’m so fucking sorry, sweetheart. I’m not gonna run again. I promise.”
You knew he meant it. With all his heart.
Your hands buried in his soaked curls, you pulled him closer, and Eddie obliged happily, pressing himself against you while your back thudded against the hood of his van.  
One of his hands roamed down your waist, to your thigh, as he helped you sit on the metal of the hood, not caring for the rain soaking your skirt as you wrapped your legs around his waist to pull him closer, and the sweetest noise tumbled from Eddie’s lips as you bucked your hips against his, your crotch meeting the growing bulge in his pants to make him groan into the kiss as his tongue grazed your bottom lip.
You didn’t care about the pouring rain or the hard metal of the van’s hood beneath you. Nothing else mattered but Eddie’s lips on yours, his arms around you.
The cold of the spring night was melted away by the heat of Eddie’s body pressed against yours, the blissful burning sensation his kisses sent through you.
His arm snaked around you, hand settling on the back of your head to support your weight as the other slipped underneath the soaked shirt of your cheerleader uniform, fingertips drawing small circles on your wet skin as his tongue danced over yours, his intoxicating taste of chocolate and the faintest trace of cigarettes mingling with the rain and the salt of your tears invading your senses and sending your mind spinning like sparkling, frizzing champagne injected straight in your veins – only better. So, so much better.
Intoxicating and dizzying in all the ways only Eddie ever could make you feel.
With each kiss, so ravenous and greedy and gentle and sweet all at the same time, Eddie was placing all the pieces of your heart back together, mending what he’d broken.
Rain and darkness became your guardians, shielding you from the cruel, prying eyes of the rest of the world as you sunk into Eddie’s arms, rolling your hips against his with more vigor this time, and his answering groan, vibrating through your own body to stoke the embers glowing in your core into flames, drifted into the rain-filled dark of the parking lot.
The sodden skirt of your uniform had ridden up with the movement, and Eddie’s hand left your waist to roam down, exploring the side of your thigh, fingertips warm against your cold skin as he started to toy with the waistband of your panties, thumb hooking around the fabric as you pressed closer in a silent plea for him to follow through and remove the damn thing –
“Wait,” Eddie breathed, pulling away to assess you, and concern took over his expression.
“We need to get you somewhere warm before you catch your death out here,” he said softly – and only then did you realize you were, indeed, shivering. Tremors were racing through your body as the freezing spring-rain soaked through the fabric of your cheerleader uniform, running down the bare skin of your arms, your legs, plastering the fabric to your body and settling on your skin with biting intensity.
“Oh,” you replied, mind still caught up in the blissful haze of his kisses.
But when Eddie moved to gently pull you down from the hood of his van, back towards the gym with him, you called out softly, “No. I don’t want to go back in there right now.”
Eddie tilted his head, confusion still written across his features before his eyes lit up with an idea. “Then the van it is. Come on, sweetheart. Gotta warm you up.”
“You did a pretty good job with that already,” you teased as Eddie ripped open the doors at the back of the van, helping you climb inside with a gallant little bow before following you, pulling the doors shut to lock the two of you in the peaceful solitude of the car.
The band equipment which was usually occupying the cargo space was gone, leaving room for the two of you.
Eddie knelt in front of you as you sat, already grabbing one of the scratchy old wool blankets stacked in the back he usually used as padding to keep the band’s equipment safe from his maniacal driving style.
“C’mere,” he said softly, unfolding the blanket as he scooted closer, and your heart fluttered happily in your chest at the tenderness with which he wrapped the blanket around your shoulders, using the edges to gentle swipe at the mix of rain and drying tears on your cheeks, drawing a soft smile from you before you grabbed a second blanket.
“Your turn,” you instructed, gesturing for Eddie to shrug off the sodden combination of denim vest and leather jacket. The shirt beneath was plastered to his chest, and you inched closer to put the blanket around his shoulders, carding your fingertips through the wet strands of his bangs falling into his forehead – and Eddie reached out to gently catch your wrist.
“Are we…”, he began but drifted off timidly, and sadness flooded his umber eyes, as if he were scared to voice the question dangling in the air between the two of you.
He swallowed, gathering his courage underneath your own soft gaze before he said quietly, “Do you still want me?”
Affection washed over you at the anxiety in his gaze, the soft tremble of his bottom lip, and you gently freed your wrist from his grasp to lace your fingers with his.
“You’ve always been the only one I wanted, Eddie Munson.”
The smile on his lips was radiant, dazzling, warming you from within as he slowly pulled you towards him, onto his lap, his hands leaving yours to settle on your hips beneath the blanket wrapped around your shoulders like a cape, the warmth of his palms seeping through the sodden fabric of your shirt.
And with an intensity in his dark eyes that burned right through you in all the best ways, Eddie murmured, “I’m a goddamn dumbass.”
“You are,” you agreed with a soft giggle, “But you’re my goddamn dumbass.”
“Where were we?”, he grinned, nuzzling your nose, that radiant smile still on his lips.
But you bit your lip, scanning his face, before you timidly asked, “Is that why we didn’t…make it to Third Base yet?”
The little wince in reply didn’t escape your notice, but before your heart could sink again, he said, “At first, I wanted to take things slow and do it right and be a gentleman.”
“And then?”
“Then I got scared. Because…I’ve never, you know. I was scared senseless I’d do something wrong. I’m…I’m not confident. I’m just really good at playing pretend. I mean, I’m confident when I play D&D or my guitar but I feel like these are the only two things I’m actually good at so…”
He drifted off again, averting his gaze.
Your hands came up to cup his cheeks, and you gently tilted his head to make him meet your gaze before you murmured, “What happened in those two weeks, Eddie?”
He meekly shook his head, squeezing his eyes shut as he tried to fight his tears, and your heart bled for him – and raged, about all the bullying and the cruelties he must have had to endure for them to lodge as deep as they obviously had.
“You can tell me,” you pleaded softly. “You know you can tell me, right?”
You could tell he was fighting the tears, the shame – and had you been able to set fire to the whole damn town for treating him like this, making sweet, caring, kind Eddie believe the ugly, vile things they were whispering about him, you would have burned this whole Hellhole to the ground.
“You also know you don’t have to tell me,” you added, brushing away a few soaked curls from his cheeks. “You can tell me when you’re ready. Okay?”
He gave you a curt nod, swallowing against the lump in his throat.
And into the silence which followed, filled by the soft pitter-patter of the rain on the van’s roof, you placed the softest, delicate kiss on his cheek before you breathed, “I love you, Eddie Munson. For the way you light up every room with your smiles and your laugh. For seeing people, instead of just looking at them. For choosing kindness when it would be easier to just be rude. For caring about all the lost little sheepies.” Your words coaxed a timid little smile from his as he watched you, your fingertips playing with the sodden dark curls framing his face, “For caring. For being unapologetic and yourself even if you don’t think you’re brave, because sadly, being yourself in a world like ours and a town like Hawkins is the bravest thing one could do. And for giving others the courage to do the same. For giving me the courage to do the same.”
“Chances are,” he quipped, that tender smile playing on his lips, “That no matter how weird you are, I’ll still be the weirdest one in the room.”
You chuckled softly, before your expression grew stern once more. “I mean it. I love you, for more reasons than there are raindrops falling outside. And I’m sorry people don’t care enough to look at you, because if they did, they’d love you just as much as I do, Eddie Munson.”
“I don’t care if people love me,” he breathed, leaning closer, his lips hovering over yours, “I only care that you do. Nothing else matters.”
And his lips captured yours.
The kiss was sweet, slower than the ones you’d shared in the rain, yet it had lost none of its fierceness.
His arms wrapped around you, pulling you closer as you buried your fingertips in his curls once more, relishing the low moan the motion coaxed from Eddie’s lips, the sensation of his soft, soaked strands gliding through your fingers, rainwater running down your palms as you sunk into the kiss.
And with each movement of his lips against yours, you could feel his doubts melting away alongside your own.
Something had changed, in the way he touched you, you realized.
Something you hadn’t consciously realized had been there before.
Where the caress of Eddie’s hands had been restrained by hesitation before, it had grown bold. Where his kisses had been careful, as if he’d always feared to do something wrong, to overstep and scare you away, there was no more holding back now.
It was like a dam had broken, and you happily let the tide sweep you away, immerse you in the way his hands roamed over your sides, slipped beneath your cheerleader uniform to explore every inch of you, painting gentle patterns on your wet skin like he used to draw his little doodles into his books.
You could feel him smile into the kiss as you uttered the softest of moans when he drew his fingernails up your spine, making you arch your back and roll your hips against his, the already soaked spot on your panties rubbing just right against the tent in his pants, and the shudder running through Eddie made the heat in your core blaze just as much as the sensation did.
“I need you,” you whispered, “If – if you want –“
“God, you have noooo idea how much,” Eddie cut you off with a soft chuckle – one that morphed into a sweet groan as you rolled your hips against his again as he eagerly met your movement with a buck of his own hips, his teeth gently grazing your lips as his hands roam down to the outside of your thighs, dragging his nails over your feverish skin to leave trails of sparks in the wake of his touches, nerves flaring like sparklers as your body came alive beneath his hands.
And it felt like your heart would burst out of your chest with nerves and exhilaration and love and arousal as Eddie’s thumb hooked around the waistband of your panties for the second time that night.
“These need to go,” he breathed into the kiss – a question more than a statement, asking for permission – and you replied with an eager nod.
“Then get rid of them,” you crooned, the heat in your core, the need for him, putting a low rasp into your voice you’d never heard there before.
And with the sound of tearing fabric filling the rain-laced silence of the van, the panties were gone, and you pulled away from the kiss to gape at Eddie.
Who looked just as surprised as you did.
“I’m…sorry,” he said, the sudden timidness in his expression not quite matching the way his pupils were blow, the black nearly eclipsing the umber shade of his irises in the half-dark in the van’s back, the dim, murky light of the parking lot’s streetlamps seeping through the windshield shedding just enough light.
“Did you just rip my panties?”, you giggled, and the guilt in his eyes grew as he replied, “Uh. You wanted them gone.”
“That’s hot,” you grinned. “Very metal.”
His relieved exhale filled the air before he kissed you again, one hand coming up to the nape of your neck as his other hand dove underneath the hem of your cheerleader skirt once again, fingertips gently wandering up the inside of your thigh, painting burning trails of pleasure over the sensitive skin, and the filthy sound you made when his thumb gently flicked over that spot at the apex of your thighs where you needed him most made you gasp in surprise. But before you could pull away from the kiss, before you could even think of feeling embarrassed, Eddie crooned into the kiss, “That was hotter. I hope there’s more where that was coming from.”
You smiled against his lips, and another groan bubbled up your throat as he repeated the motion, the pad of his thumb drawing slow circles over your clit, spreading the wetness that was pooling between your legs – one which had nothing to do with the rain and everything with him.
“Is this good?”, he whispered.
Yes, you wanted to reply, so good. But the sensations of burning pleasure the caress of his thumb was sending through you was stealing the words from your tongue and every rational thought from your mind until there was nothing left but the raw, all-consuming need for more, more, more.
Eddie seemed to understand, though – and your hips moving in sync with the caress of his fingertips over your soaked heat, you angled your head to trail kisses along his jaw, down the column of his throat, inhaling his intoxicating scent of leather and cologne and him, of the rainwater soaking his beautiful dark curls while your hands wandered down to slip beneath the hem of his shirt, caressing the soft skin beneath and relishing the sounds your kisses, your touches, conjured from his lips like the sweetest melody in the world.
“God, sweetheart,” Eddie breathed, and the rasp in his voice, darkened by his own arousal, did nothing to quench the need burning in your core, “You’re so fucking perfect.”
“So are you,” you whispered against his neck, feeling him shudder softly with the sensation of your hot breath fanning over his skin as his fingertips worked you into blissful oblivion.
“I need you,” you rasped, fingertips travelling down towards the waistband of his jeans, following the soft line of his happy trail before you stilled above the buckle of his belt, waiting for his permission, and a smile curved your lips as his hands left their previous position to undo the belt and help you free him.
Your gaze locked on his as your hand wrapped around his throbbing length, a barely suppressed groan ripping from his throat…and a sudden fit of nervousness gripped you.
And of course, Eddie – attentive, gentle Eddie – didn’t even take a split second to see the flicker of nerves which must have crossed your gaze, because with overwhelming tenderness in his gaze, his hands came down to grasp yours, lacing your fingers as he whispered, “We don’t have to do this now, sweetheart. We got all the time in the world, ‘kay?”
“I want this,” you said, your voice more vehement than you’d intended for. “I want all of you, Eddie. And I don’t want to wait a second longer, so if it’s what you want, too…”
The smile lighting up Eddie’s face even in the half-dark was the sweetest one you’d ever seen, so filled with love and tenderness and devotion for you that it made your heart sing as he said, “I don’t think there’s ever been anything I wanted more than…not just that. Just…you.”
For a heartbeat, you just smiled at each other.
Perfectly at ease in each other’s presence, just like it was supposed to be, like it had always been before you’d stopped sneaking around those two weeks ago.
“There’s just one more thing I need to do first,” you said softly, climbing to your feet, hunched so you wouldn’t hit your head on the van’s roof as you felt for the little button embedded there, and a triumphant little huff escaped you as you turned on the small ceiling light before you positioned yourself back on Eddie’s lap, straddling him – and froze as you saw the utter terror in his expression.
“Eddie? What’s wrong?”, you inquired softly, tilting your head.
“I – I’d thought we’d be leaving that off,” he replied hollowly.
And for the first time, you felt gnawing, gut-wrenching insecurity.
“Don’t you…want to see me?”, you asked timidly, heat rising in your cheeks, but the terror in Eddie’s gaze grew as he blurted, “NO! I mean, yes! Jesus, yes! I want to see you. It’s…you don’t have to see me.”
The way he spoke the words in a broken whisper, shattered you all over again.
Because it dawned on you what he might have heard in the course of his life to warrant such raging insecurity. In the course of the past two weeks. You could imagine it too vividly.
And your heart bled for him all over again.
“I don’t know how anyone could ever have perceived you as anything else,” you said quietly, taking his face in your hands, a silent plea for him to look at you, “But you’re beautiful, Eddie. Not just handsome, not just hot, but beautiful.”
He opened his mouth to protest, but you cut him off when you fiercely added, “Like, that was the first thing I thought when I saw you for the first time, in Mrs. O’Donnell’s class. The only seat that was free was the one beside you and you looked at me with those stunning dark eyes and I was so, so nervous because I’d never seen you up close before and my heart plummeted three stories into the damn basement when I did because I knew I’d have the hardest time of my life not to ogle you like some creep. I mean, I did,” you snickered, “But very subtle.”
“You did?”
“God, yes. I memorized every detail. I’ll be getting my diploma in four weeks but I already graduated from the Eddie Munson Color Scheme School. I memorized the exact shades of your hair and the exact hue of your eyes before I ever told you the bat tattoo looked amazing. And I’m a little ashamed to tell you that my…my mind went a little bit into the gutter when I watched you draw your doodles, which, by the way, wasn’t about the doodles but your hands.”
There was a timid, bewildered little smile on Eddie’s soft lips as he watched you bite your lip.
“You…you’re not making that up?”, he inquired.
“The exact. Shade. Every little detail. It took me a week to memorize you better than I ever did my own damn reflection in the mirror so it’s safe to say I was crushing on you way before you started crushing on me.” Your expression softened as you placed a kiss on his cheek. “But I’ll turn the light off if you don’t want it. I just wanted you to know that whatever you heard…it was a lie. You’re beautiful, Eddie Munson. And maybe one day, I can help you see that, too.”
You made to rise from his lap and flip off the light, but Eddie’s hands grasped your waist, keeping you in place as he leaned in to kiss you.
And this time, there we no more interruptions. No more insecurities.
Just love.
“I love you, sweetheart” Eddie whispered into the kiss as he aligned himself with your entrance as you lifted your hips, heart racing with giddiness and love and the tiniest flutter of nerves – and with his beautiful umber eyes on yours, brimming with all the love mirrored in his voice, the tenderness of his touch as his free hand settled on your cheek, you slowly sunk onto him, burying him inside you, stretching you inch by tiny inch as you sunk down, breath hitching in your throat at the sensation, the tiny little sting of pain that didn’t escape his notice as he stilled. For a moment, worry took over his expression. “Wait, did – did that hurt?”
His voice was strained with a suppressed moan.
You were quick to shake your head. “No. Just a little sting. Don’t you dare stop,” you whispered with a smile.
You could sense how he wanted to protest, make sure you were okay when you were more than okay, and you met his lips in a kiss that was fierce enough to swallow all of his concerns as you settled in this new position. The sensation of him buried inside you knocked the air from your lungs and the strength from your body, delirious with the feeling of him as close as he could ever be, two pieces of a puzzle falling in place, and your eyes fluttered close with the flood of sensations.
“You good?”, Eddie asked, his fingertips caressing your cheeks, his voice strained with his arousal as he waited for you to adjust to him – and your mind went blank when you rolled your hips, your whole body turning into a live wire with the sensation bolting through your nerves, with Eddie’s blissed-out moan filling the interior of his van as he slowly rolled his hips to match your rhythm, his lips finding yours as his arms wrapped around you, your own hands burying in his mess of sodden curls.
It was better, so much better, than anything you’d ever imagined.
“Don’t stop”, you whispered as he gently thrust up, his hips snapping against yours, grazing that sweet spot deep inside of you to make you throw your head back as currents of pleasure zapped through your body, building this glowing, white-hot pressure in your core with each thrust.
“God, you feel so good,” Eddie murmured between moans. His breath prickled on your lips before he caught them in another kiss, open-mouthed and sloppy and sweet at the same time as you got lost in the moment, the raw, radiant bliss Eddie was making you feel, the sensation of your bodies melting together so perfectly, as if you were made for each other.
The sweet noises tumbling from his soft lips mingled with yours in-between kisses while his free hand began to trail your spine, the side of your neck, gently tilting your head to give him access to your throat. His teeth grazed the sensitive skin over your racing pulse as you cried out in pleasure at the throbbing ache building in your core, driving him deeper into your throbbing heat with each of his thrusts, each roll of your hips to match his pace, your heart pounding as fast as the rain still pelting down onto the van’s roof.
“I love you”, Eddie whispered, “I love you so much.”
The dark, rasping timbre of his voice engulfed your senses as his hand snaked beneath your skirt once more, fingertips dancing over your clit to draw the most sinful sounds from you with the skill you’d watched him play his beloved guitar so many times, building that glowing pressure in your core until you thought you’d burst with it.
With a final cry of pleasure, your climax washed over you, swept you away in a white-hot wave of bliss that made stars explode in your vision, your fingers tightening in his hair as you could feel him come undone alongside you at the feeling of your walls clenching around him, your name tumbling from his lips as he rested his forehead against yours.
There was only Eddie, buried deep inside you, making you feel as if you were flying as his hands found their way to your hips to help you lazily ride out your climaxes together.
And with the softest sigh bubbling from your lips, you collapsed against Eddie, face buried in the crook of his neck while his hands came up to caress the sides of your face, placing the softest kisses on the crown of your head as he murmured, a little timid all of a sudden, “Was…was that good for you?”
You raised your head to give him a blissful little smile, caught up in the daze of your afterglow. “God, this was so much better than good, Eddie.”
“Good,” Eddie grinned. “This…this was amazing. Like…I figured it would be amazing but this was…this was so much better than I even dreamed of and I dreamed of this, with you, more times than I’m comfortable admitting.” He let out a breathless chuckle of his own that mingled with your giggles.
He looked positively blissed. His curls, only just beginning to dry, were a wild mess, his pale cheeks dusted with a soft blush, and his umber eyes were wide, filled with so much joy and love that you felt a lump in your throat as he mirrored your grin with the most radiant, dazzling smile of his own.
“So, uh,” he grinned, nuzzling your nose, “I wanted to ask that over chocolate milkshakes at Benny’s diner but I figured now’s just as good a time as any, so…wanna go to prom with me?”
You reeled back, gaping at him. “Like, prom prom?”
“Um. Is there, like, more than one?”
The alarm in his eyes made you laugh. “No, I mean. You. Eddie Munson. Going to prom?”
“Well, since we’re official and the plan still stands to turn heel and get the Hell outta here together as soon as we get those diplomas, I thought I could just as well do something…weird for one night.”
You laughed, and Eddie joined in, his hand grasping yours to guide it to his lips, placing a delicate kiss on your knuckles.
“Uh, you didn’t reply yet. Getting a little nervous here, sweetheart.”
“Only if you attend in your best leather jacket.”
You could visibly see him deflate with relief at the thought of not having to wear an actual tuxedo, and your smile turned mischievous as you drawled, “And only if you help me pick out the dress you get to rip off of me afterwards.”
“That’s a deal I can live with,” he grinned, before his expression softened once more.
“I love you, sweetheart. And as long as you’ll have me…I’ll stay. Promise.”
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write-tama · 2 months
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I need more of Francis Mosses x reader fluff tbh and I enjoy reading some of your works with him so here's my request: Reader is stressed about life, college or something of your choice and needed some comfort from him 🥺🤎 thank you in advance aaahshqhs 😭 (tbh I don't see much sfw works of Francis on this app, maybe I'm not searching enough?)
"rest a little-- for me at least.."
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ francis mosses x student!stressed!reader
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sypnosis ; reader and francis have been hard at work trying to achieve their ultimate goals for the future. but lately, reader has been burning themselves out, and its up to francis to help realize how tired reader is.
containing ; exhaustion, reader is a college student, francis works double shifts, francis and reader are high school sweethearts (in this au anastacha is not his daughter), francis is worried about reader, TOOTH ACHING FLUFF RAGH
author’s note ; eee thank u anon! also dw, i also experienced the same problem trying to find sfw for francis 😭😭 its lowkey the reason why i had to crawl out of my hiatus hole LOL but ya really hope u enjoy :]
04.15.24 | 1.4k words
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Five shots of espresso from the cafe across the block could not fix how fucking exhausted you were.
You and Francis have been together since your highschool days. You have always dreamed of going to college to become a forensic scientist to work in the police force for super interesting crimes— but holy shit— were you tired from the projects and the essays.
You haven’t seen Francis in a few days either, despite living in the same apartment. He’s been working shifts in the morning and night just to make ends meet while also saving up for a house that you two could buy together. It was exhausting, but it was all a part of the plan. You worked a little side job as well delivering papers early in the morning just as a quick cash grab, but that also meant you barely spent mornings with your boyfriend. It’s not like you guys had the time anyway. He had to work in the morning too, which made it all the more frustrating.
After finally reaching your apartment, you immediately kicked off your shoes and threw your bag to the nearest corner before flopping down on the couch. A loud groan rumbled from your throat, finally giving your exhaustion a voice. You looked up from the couch, too tired to even turn on the TV. From the corner of your eye though, you saw in the kitchen a pot on the stove with a bright yellow sticky note on the top of it. Out of curiosity, you lifted yourself from the cushions with all your strength before heading towards the kitchen.
You waddled over to the pot with a curious tilt to your head as read the sticky note:
You left for work before I could tell you, but I’m coming off my shift early today and I’m not working tonight. Here’s some lunch I prepared this morning. Love you honey, get some rest. -Fran
Your grin stretched from ear-to-ear as you opened the lid to be welcomed with the smell of fresh spaghetti and meatballs. You turned on the gas stove to heat up the food, and used a clean wooden spoon to stir the food gradually. As you did, you couldn’t help as yawns escaped your mouth. You thought about taking a nap after your meal, seeing as how later today you needed to take some notes for an upcoming exam.
Your need for success never gave you the permission to give yourself a break every once in a while. In fact, the only times you did take a break was when Francis was sick and he needed someone by his side to take care of him. Other than that, you were always academically focused. Every once in a while, Francis would voice his opinion, telling you that you shouldn’t be burning yourself out so fast, but it was your determination and your vision of a perfect future with him that fueled you. Was this safe for your own mental health? Absolutely not. But you were aware of the consequences, and you pushed yourself anyway.
You felt your body grow increasingly heavy. You quickly jolted your head up, not even realizing that your eyes were fluttered close and you had stopping moving your spoon for a few seconds. You shook yourself awake, quickly grabbing a plate and helping yourself to a serving. You made sure to turn off the stove as well before throwing the spoon in the sink and grabbing a clean metal fork to enjoy your meal. It was best to hurry on and sit down before you became a danger to yourself.
You placed your food down on the coffee table before curling up on the couch. Maybe some TV would wake me up, you thought to yourself. You picked up the TV remote and browsed through the channels, eventually settling on a random game show that was airing live. Feeling a bit more energized, you placed a pillow in your lap before resting your food on top of it.
After each bite you felt your eyelids getting heavy. Your body started slowly giving in, despite your protests. The host’s voice soon turned into muffles as you felt your head nod a little. Each time you felt yourself falling, you immediately jolted up, not wanting to succumb to your body’s need for rest. What you really needed to do was to finish those essays and projects, and to also greet your loving boyfriend once he comes back from work. Your mind started dragging along little plans on how you would be able to accomplish everything before sleeping, but without realizing, your eyes had fallen closed as you leaned back in the couch.
Francis came back home about an hour later, tired from his work. As he placed his work bag down, he barely realized that your bag was set in the corner as well. “(y/n)?” He began to call out, but as soon as he turned around, he noticed your sleeping figure on the couch curled up with your pillow and food next to you. “Oh, (y/n)..” he mumbled, smiling a little in amusement. Francis walked over you, noticing the running TV and the half-eaten food. He first turned off the TV, making sure to not make too much noise to wake you up. He took your plate as well and covered it with a napkin before storing it in the fridge. Once Francis made it back to the living room, he sighed in relief, noticing that you still haven’t woken up. He rolled up his sleeves before carefully sliding his arms under your body, being as gentle as possible as he carried you to the bedroom.
“Mm..” You mumbled, half asleep. “Franci..?” You croaked out, burying yourself into his chest.
“Mhm..” He hummed. “I found you asleep on the couch.. I’m just moving you to the bedroom if you don’t mind..” He chuckled a little. You groaned a little in response, tugging a little at his button-down uniform.
“No..” you protested. “I have work to do.. I have projects due soon..”
Francis laid you gently down onto the soft mattress. You sat up a bit, realizing that you were still in your casual formal clothes you wore for school. You looked over to Francis, who had changed out of his work clothes, but kept his undershirt on and threw on some pajama pants. “Franci, can you—”
“Here you go.” You looked up, not even realizing that he was already handing you your midnight clothes. His tired eyes gazed upon you, but even then, his eyes were dilated with genuine care. You smiled up at him before taking the clothes and changing on the bed, throwing your clothes in a corner.
You sighed a little as you straightened out your shorts, looking down with a wearied face. “You know I need to get back to work.” You quietly muttered. Francis looked at you with a frown as he stood over the bed.
“You can’t just keep working day and night.” He lectured softly. You scoffed a little before looking at him, only to immediately falter to his puppy-eyed look. “Just rest with me this evening, please, dear?” He asked, folding his arms behind his back as he leaned down.
Your face heated up, flustered at how desperate Francis seemed to be just wanting to have a few minutes ago. You smiled softly before reaching up and caressing his face with your hand. “You know I hate it when you look at me like that..” You whispered.
“Well, it's the only way to get you to agree.” He mumbled back, sinking into your embrace. The two of you were locked in eye contact as Francis slowly climbed into the bed. His hands straddled either side of you as you leaned back against the headboard. Gradually, his lips pressed against yours, and immediately you melted. Your hands snaked around his neck, holding him as close as you could. His touch filled you with the warmth you longed for so long after drawn-out lectures and pressure-inducing assignments. All you wanted was him.
He wrapped your arms around your waist before resting himself on your chest— a sigh escaping his nostrils. “I miss this.” he muttered. “When was the last time we got to hold each other like this?”
You ran fingers through his hair, carefully tugging out knots. “Only heaven knows..” You whispered back. The two of you enjoyed the comfortable silence. Only the faint hum of the lamp filled your ears as well as the occasional vehicle rushing down the road in front of your apartment complex. Your chest rose and fell as you breathed as Francis buried himself deeper into your embrace. “I-I’m sorry I’ve been a little difficult lately.” you apologized, feeling the guilt prick at your skin. “I’ve just been so stressed with school lately.. All I could think about is work and it's ruining us—”
“Please don’t apologize for that.” Francis was quick to cut you off. He lifted his head up and now sat up properly in front of you. His eyebrows furrowed a little as he looked at your gentle figure. “Please.. Just don’t. I understand you’ve been working so hard lately. I have been to. But this is all for our future, remember?” He grabbed your hand, holding it with both of his hands before kissing your knuckles. “Mmm.. I miss our evenings together too, I truly do, but what I’m concerned about is your wellbeing. You need to give yourself a breather every once in a while. At least promise me that.”
Your body felt weak with each work he uttered. Your head rushed with stars, remembering that its moments like these that make you want to work so hard. You want nothing but blessings for this man, because if anything, he was your savior. Tears pricked at your eyes, sniffling a little as you nodded your head.
“I promise..” You said in a shaky voice. A sincere smile curled Francis lips as he reached down to kiss your forehead.
Everything is going to be okay, you thought to yourself.
Everything is okay.
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈
thats it! hope you enjoyed :3 sorry i procrastinated on this for a while im def gonna clutch on up writing after school ends (which is end of april). lowk so glad this bc ive been stressed w college work as well so rereading honestly felt SO comforting 😭😭 but anyway ya--
reblogs, likes, even replies are soso appreciated and i hope you enjoyed this story :]
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vtoriacore · 1 year
Note
Yo! It's me! I was wondering if I could request Ruggie, Idia, Riddle, and Malleus with a significant other who fights people for just breathing in their direction. Like Crowley opens his mouth and their already like "SHUT UP!" And throws chairs at people. I think the comedic potential for this is exponential
✧ alla stocatta (this chair)!
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note: this is such a funny fucking concept LMFAO😭 gremlin MC agenda has gotta be my fucking fave they have the power to be so unhinged and i live for it also not proofread because it's low-key 12 am BUT. it's readable so-
characters: ruggie, idia, riddle, malleus
people who reblogged here is a special heart and a kith y'all do the most and ily 💞
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♡ RUGGIE
ruggie finds it both amusing and kind of intimidating (and kinda hot but he'll die before he admits this yk) how you literally defend his honour (even when it doesn't necessarily need to be defended) but is he complaining? fuck no! 
half the time he is laughing and the other half is him cheering you on and maybe even encouraging you to do something just a little overboard (nothing that will get you into trouble, and if it does he's usually happy to take the blame) 
the first time he witnessed you literally throwing your broom at leona in joint flight class because he wouldn't stop bitching to ruggie was just about the most hilarious fucking thing he's ever seen and oh- there he goes falling off because he couldn't stop laughing (he stops when you catch him and ask if he's okay though - this mf may think he's slick but is literally reduced to a blubbering mess once he finds himself in a position considered a little too intimate with you) 
the second time he saw you trip someone up because they looked at him wrong, and your silly, sly self simply gave them the most unimpressed look you could muster with a "watch where you're going" 
the hyena was too stunned to speak 😮 no but seriously he found that both hilarious (as always) and admirable because holy shit, you did it so nonchalantly and it looked so fucking cool- he questions how he was even able to pull you (dw ruggie, you've got rizz!) 
he absolutely loves when you stand up for him for more serious stuff though, like if someone's insulting him for his status or for having to work etc. because your no-bullshit attitude actually works so well? you just casually throw a chair at the mf even daring to look at him and his heart goes ✨✨✨ all the while he's laughing and cheering you on from the sidelines. 
.
♡ IDIA
at first, idia is fucking terrified! bro is borderline crashing because how the fuck did you have the strength to haul that heavy ass cauldron at the person making a snide remark about him? he was going to say he's NEVER coming to class again but after this, he changes his mind so quick
like, you looked so badass doing that? the savannaclaw loser who tried insulting him barely got two words out and you just- oh wow! he just got the "in love" status applied to him again! 
nah but fr he is literally fucking grinning as he stares at the poor, poor fool laying on the ground and is so fucking smug about it too! 
"that was an ez no scope, didn't even have to be 360 lol'
"idia ily but what"
"it's a roundabout way of saying this bozo stood no chance, you pulled up on him too quick lmao"
at first, he is a bit concerned that you might end up in trouble with someone for doing all this but . . . yk, his money speaks for itself and if something does ever happen covering up wouldn't be too hard so he lets you do as you please
this hades-rapunzel secret love child thinks its low-key hot too, but he'll never admit it and he literally turns bright fucking pink anytime he even thinks this. you tried prying the answer out before, but he pulled out his secret trump card - fainting on you so he wouldn't have to say a thing
idia is another mf to absolutely egg you on as you cause some more chaos, it's getting to the point ortho had to warn you of nearly breaking someone's arm before you stopped. idia was just standing there, the most villainous, evil grin to have ever graced his face; "no, no! let them cook!"
.
♡ RIDDLE
riddle. fucking. FAINTS! 
he was NOT ready for that strawberry tart to end up lodged down someone's throat as you victoriously shrugged your shoulders with a "what? they had it coming."
"oh great heavens what have you- where is the decorum? what could have possibly compelled you to-" aaaaaaaand man's down!
when he awakes, he's frantically shaking your shoulders and asking why you would even think that nearly suffocating someone (not really, you pushed the tart far enough they could swallow) was appropriate 
but let me tell you, when he hears it was because they've insulted him and brought his mother into it, he low-key feels light headed and oh wow his cheeks are getting pretty warm huh? 
riddle, in his own spiteful way, actually doesn't probe you on this any longer and makes you promise that you won't do this in his vicinity again
you of course, nod along. you won't do it in his vicinity, but will be perfectly fine exacting your revenge straight after he's out of sight
when you actually end up having a . . . a chair duel. yes, he read that right. (he wasn't about to even question how that came about but nontheless) he ends up both impressed at you exploiting a loophole you've found within his statement and at the fact the person you've just beaten (both literally and figuratively) is miserably sitting on the floor apologising for giving riddle the wrong look at 12:34 AM on the 3rd of march. very specific 
riddle doesn't even chastise you for this one, he is exasperated but does actually pull you away from the scene and thanks you for defending him. this time, he makes you promise to resolve your fights for him verbally, but he won't be stopping you from this point on (it's because he doesn't want to and enjoys you standing up for him)
.
♡ MALLEUS
the student walking away from malleus makes him feel a bit bad. so naturally, to remedy this, you end up shouting at them! now they're backing away from you instead, isn't this the meaning of true love? (no)
this silly little very capable of looking after himself fae is fucking over the moon! absolutely smitten! completely in love! when you come to defend him and angrily shout at people for not treating him like a being worthy of respect and love.
he low-key debates proposing to you on the spot after you also somehow manage to get a student to apologize to him for fearing him for no good reason! he appreciates the sentiment and you caring for his well being, isn't that basically marriage already? no? he'd like to digress immediately
malleus does get a bit concerned when things get physical, not that he doesn't trust you to take care of yourself or anything but he worries that you might end up hurt. oh, did you think he'd care for the person you're fighting? or you getting in trouble? nah, he could literally BBQ anyone who even dared harm you anyway and if crowley even thought to step in, he'd soon be reconsidering because he doesn't want to end up an elaborate crow dish
however, on the occasion that you do outsmart your opponent (aka the savannaclaw student who just rolled his eyes at the dragon fae) he feels hella proud and is very amused at your antics. i mean, the way you just psychologically destroyed the fool in front of you for their comment on malleus not even being that good at magift is very sure to leave them questioning why they even bothered coming  out the womb for the rest of their life. 
he is another one that finds it low-key 😳😳😳 like damn, did you always look this badass when flipping someone off for even breathing wrong near him? sane thoughts just weren't made for malleus
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cuubism · 7 months
Text
"Ooh, Kinky"
Hob enjoys doing small, nice things for Dream. Dream... really likes it. A lot. Explicit. Acts of service Hob. Horny-for-kindness Dream. Smut, light angst, fluff, and simple pleasures.
Dream is about to reach his fucking limit with this social event. Hob knows, because he's seen it happen more than a few times before. It doesn't help that Dream's limit is... easily reached.
Unfortunately, this is a political event critical to the peaceful relations of the Dreaming, so they can't just fuck off whenever they like. Well, Hob could, probably, but he won't leave Dream stranded surrounded by his greatest enemies. Those enemies being small talk and attempting to smile, of course.
Dream is perfectly savage in a conversation when he’s allowed to use words as clever and cutting as he likes, but this event has been mostly petty, mundane topics and people trying to see just how rude they can get away with being before Dream breaks his composure. He never does, because he’s trying to reaffirm the strength of the Dreaming after his long absence, but his glares are icy and his annoyance visible in the patina of stardust dancing over his skin. Hob’s never seen someone say Your company has been a pleasure with quite so much venom, and he spent a not-insignificant amount of time as a knight in the Queen’s court.
He watches Dream grit his teeth and visibly restrain himself from dissolving into sand at the end of yet another mundane conversation, his fingers clenching at nothing. Once the person’s retreated, Hob leans against his side, murmuring in his ear, “Just a little while longer, hm?” and rubs a hand up and down Dream’s back. “Then I’ll take you home, run you a bath, get you those biscuits you like. Sound good?”
All Hob is expecting to get is a hum of acknowledgment, maybe a smile if he’s really lucky. Instead, Dream stares at him, eyes wide.
“What?” Hob says. He hadn’t even said anything bad. He’d been trying to offer a little encouragement, not make Dream more frustrated, after all.
“I—” Dream says, and swallows hard. Hob watches his throat bob. “That. Would be nice. Thank you.”
Odd.
Hob offers him a small smile, but doesn’t get to ask about it further as somebody else comes up looking for the Dream Lord’s attention. Hob leaves him to it for now, mulling on that reaction as he wanders in search of another conversation partner. He’ll just have to ask about it later.
****
Hob does not get to ask about it later. Nor does he get to run Dream a bath, or even get the biscuits out of the cabinet, because the moment they return to the Waking, Dream is climbing on top of him in bed and pulling down his pajama pants.
Hob just watches him do it for several long moments, half of his brain still asleep and the other half not comprehending things much better. “That all got you really pent up, huh?”
Instead of answering, Dream licks a stripe up Hob’s cock.
Hob yelps. “Jesus fuck!”
Dream merely hums, already hyper-focused on his self-appointed task of driving Hob round the bend. He leans in low, takes Hob’s dick in his mouth, sucks on it like it’s the only thing he’s been thinking of for the past eight hours, or whatever amount of time in the Dreaming, and, well, if Hob wasn’t hard when he woke up, he will be in about three seconds.
What a wakeup call.
“Dream—” Hob flails in his general direction and manages to find his hair, tangles his fingers in it. He has no idea what in the bloody fuck is going on, though it’s hardly a situation he’ll protest. “What—?”
“I appreciated,” Dream says, pulling off Hob’s rapidly hardening cock, “your company at that wretched event.”
Hob pets his hair, cradles his cheek. "My love, you don't have to pay me back for these things. You know I would do anything for you."
"You misunderstand." Dream leans his forehead into Hob's hip, breathing hard. Breathing. He really is worked up. "It is not. Obligation. I simply. Was thinking of you. All night."
"Oh. Alright then. Really?"
"There was nothing that could hold my thoughts more than you, my lover."
Hob sighs. "You say such pretty things."
"As do you."
The sight of Dream looking up at him with his face still pressed to Hob’s pelvis is not sanity-inspiring, but Hob still manages to ask, “What did I say, exactly?”
Dream hums as he presses his closed lips to Hob’s dick again, and the vibration travels all the way through Hob’s body. “Taking me home. Baths.” He kisses the head of Hob’s cock, tongue darting out just briefly to wet it. “Biscuits.”
It takes Hob so long to comprehend this he wonders if he’s actually still been asleep this whole time. “That’s what got you worked up?”
“It was sweet.” His long fingers sneak up to Hob’s hips. “Alluring.”
Hob is going to have to unpack this at a later time. “You sure you don’t just want the bath and biscuits?” he asks, and then immediately wants to hit himself.
“Later,” says Dream, and returns to his task of waking Hob up in the most startling way possible.
Later, they do indeed have that bath, which Dream takes as another opportunity to show his apparent appreciation, then rests, purring, against Hob’s chest as the water cools. Hob still has no bloody idea exactly what he’s done to inspire this, but he’s definitely going to have to do it again.
****
Apparently, he does it again not a week later.
Hob’s finally managed to get Dream in the habit of taking the occasional, proper night off from his work in the Dreaming, and so tonight Hob’s made them dinner (more for the familiar experience of sharing a meal than with the expectation that Dream will actually eat), with plans to have a relaxing night in watching a movie afterwards, and then even later, as they usually do, winding up in bed for something even more ‘relaxing’.
It doesn’t go that way. Or rather, it does go that way, but a hell of a lot faster than Hob had intended, and a lot weirder, too.
It starts with dinner, although ‘dinner’ is a bit of an optimistic way to speak of it—it’s actually ice cream, because if there’s one thing Dream will sometimes eat, it’s sweets. There’s never a bad time to eat ice cream, though, in Hob’s opinion. If you have regular access to ice, and freezers, why the hell wouldn’t you make use of it?
And Dream likes sweets. And florals. Hob has attempted to combine these into lavender-flavored ice cream—not something he’d been certain would work, when he started it, but he thinks it’s turned out pretty well.
He places a dish of it on the coffee table in front of Dream, a tiny spoon already stuck into the ice cream. Dream touches the condensation on the cold dish. “Did you make this?”
“Yup.” Hob takes a tiny spoonful of his own, and, yes, it is good, thank God. “It’s actually not as hard as I might have thought.”
Instead of using his spoon, Dream just dips a delicate fingertip in and brings a tiny smear of ice cream to his mouth. Licks his finger clean. Does he actually, truly, have to do those kinds of things to Hob’s sanity? “Lavender?”
“Mmhmm. Was going to try for dandelion, actually? I remember how much you liked the wine the other day. But I wasn’t sure the flavor would come through.”
“Because I liked it?” Dream says, looking down at the dish again. He sounds lost in thought.
“Yeah, of course I made it because you liked it.” Frankly, a large, and continually growing, percentage of Hob’s behavior is driven by what Dream might like.
“You do not have to go through such effort,” Dream says.
“Don’t have to,” Hob agrees. “I want to. Go on. Eat it.” He taps at Dream’s bowl with his spoon. Dream takes another tentative spoonful—actually using the spoon this time—and hums in appreciation.
“It is… very good,” he admits, and Hob can’t help his smile. He sits beside Dream on the couch, tucks into his own bowl—but quickly becomes aware that Dream is more so watching him than he is eating his ice cream, though he does occasionally lift some to his mouth and take a slow bite, lips lingering on the spoon.
“Have I got it on my face?” Hob asks, but instead of responding, as soon as he turns Dream leans in to kiss him.
Hob lets out an involuntary startled sound, but quickly gets with the program, putting down his bowl and taking Dream’s face between his hands instead. Dream tastes, of course, of lavender, with the static charge that sometimes jumps to his lips when he’s worked up. He licks into Hob’s mouth, pushing closer, leaving aside his bowl and spoon to half-crawl into Hob’s lap, whines when Hob runs his hands through his hair.
Hob chuckles as Dream starts tugging at his shirt. “Easy, love. No rush.”
“Is that truly what you wish?” Dream asks, pulling away just far enough to speak against Hob’s lips. His voice is heavy with want. “For me to go… slower?”
Deep down, Hob is really not a very strong man.
So he lets Dream push him down onto the couch, pulls him in with a smile as Dream kisses him hungrily. Hob’s back will regret this later, but for now he just spins into this moment with Dream, forgets about the subtle strangeness of Dream’s pivot to sex because Dream seems so happy and that’s all Hob wants, for him to be happy.
Dream undresses them both and straddles his lap and rides him like he lives to do it, and that successfully wipes any lingering thoughts from Hob’s head. All he knows is the blessed touch of Dream’s skin and the euphoria of having him. And knowing that, some way or another, he did make Dream happy.
****
Every once in a while, Dream brings his work to the Waking world so he can sit beside Hob while he grades without falling behind on his duties in the Dreaming. Hob’s not sure… exactly how he does that. He can’t properly create dreams in the Waking world, of course, but he seems to be able to… sketch. Drawing patterns in his sand on the tabletop, or molding it in the air before him, then whisking the designs back to the Dreaming for later fulfillment. It’s fascinating and highly distracting when Hob is trying to grade, but he certainly won’t tell Dream to stop.
Now, Dream has been spinning the same amorphous shape before him for nearly an hour, frowning. Stuck. His shoulders are tight, arms held aloft in the same position for far longer than a human would be able to manage.
Hob nudges his calf with his toes from where they’re sitting across from each other on the couch, legs outstretched. “You want to take a break, love?”
“A break,” Dream mutters, greatly affronted. “I think not.”
Oh, Hob can play this game. “What if I make it worth your while? Little massage, maybe? You must be sore after sculpting for that long.”
“I don’t get sore,” Dream, the proud idiot, says instantly — before pausing and taking in the rest of Hob’s statement. He finally meets Hob’s eyes, the swirling sand collapsing back into a cube in his palms. “You would… do that?”
“What, a massage? Yeah, I mean, it’s nice, isn’t it?”
“It is,” Dream agrees, staring off into the distance over Hob’s shoulder. “Nice.”
Hob scoots over on the couch to push up next to him, takes Dream’s hand between both of his own and starts rubbing at the meat of his palm. “Yeah, isn’t it? Something the matter?”
“Not as such.” Dream contemplates for a long moment; Hob waits patiently. “I suppose I am not used to it. It affects me, when you say such things.”
The fact that a simple offer of a massage to make him feel better is confusing to Dream hurts Hob’s heart, but fortunately it’s a problem he can fix. Or at least, something he can make Dream get used to. Eventually.
He kisses Dream’s palm. “Well? How about it, then? Let me make you feel good?”
“You make me feel good,” Dream says, with a little smirk that suggests exactly what he means. “Often.”
“Not what I meant, but we can do that, too.”
“Very well, Hob,” Dream concedes, with a heaving sigh, as if this is quite a concession indeed. “Do your worst.”
****
Hob does not get very far into “his worst.”
He supposes it was only inevitable. Straddling Dream’s thighs, rubbing warm oil in soothing patterns over his lithe back and upper arms, is not really a position conducive to reason. Hob didn’t start it, though. He was determined to show Dream an actual, nice, mostly innocent massage.
Then he’d pressed his thumbs into Dream’s neck, rubbing out the undeniable knots that were there despite Dream’s insistence that he did not have a physical body, and Dream had let out a very not innocent moan. And had pushed his ass up against Hob’s clothed dick.
“Stay still,” Hob had said, and Dream had subsided immediately, but not in true understanding or acquiescence. No, it was the quick obedience he played at because he knew obeying Hob’s commands like that turned Hob on.
Hob had recognized the ploy, but that did not change that fact that his self-control in the face of an obedient, wanting, moaning Dream was exactly zero.
That’s how they’ve ended up here. With Hob pressing Dream into the sheets, fucking him hard and fast, hands still slick with massage oil.
“You are incapable of just having a good fucking time,” he complains, not slowing in the slightest.
When Dream replies, Hob can hear his smirk even through the muffling of the pillow. “I am having a good time now.”
“There’s more than one type of a good time,” Hob says, and bites the back of Dream’s neck.
Dream shudders. “Why change a good thing?”
“More than one type of good thing,” Hob repeats. He doesn’t really know why he’s attempting to convince Dream not to have sex. How incredibly self-sabotaging. Only it feels important that Dream gets to experience simple nice things as well. Not only sex.
Though of course, Hob is always in favor of sex.
He tables that conversation for later. “Hush, now,” he says, and mouths over the bite mark he’d made on the back of Dream’s neck, deepening the bruise. “We’ll talk about that later, after I make you come.”
“Oh, we will?” Dream says, petulantly, and Hob leans back, pulling Dream with him by the hips so he’s balanced precariously on his elbows and knees, spine arched, as Hob keeps fucking into him. Which, admittedly, is probably exactly the kind of reaction Dream wanted to get out of him.
Dream lets out a pleased groan at the new angle, confirming Hob’s suspicions. Hob loves to get those sounds out of him, though, even if by Dream’s design. His own breath is loud in the quiet bedroom, the quick slap of their bodies together too, but Dream’s moan as Hob takes him in hand is louder.
His hand is slick with oil still, and Dream slides easily through his grip, pushed by the force of Hob’s movement. Each thrust punches a broken ha-h! sound from him, and his hands are fisted in the sheets, and Hob knows from experience his eyes are squeezed shut tight. Braced against overwhelm.
Lord does Hob love to overwhelm him.
“Do you think you’ll be sore tomorrow?” he asks, false casual. “More than when you were working? Do you think you’ll still feel me in you?”
“Yes,” Dream pants. “Yes.”
“Will you keep it, even if it hurts?” Dream could easily wash these small human remnants from his form, but sometimes he doesn’t. Sometimes he comes back to Hob joints still aching from being fucked. God it makes Hob sick with want.
“Pain is good,” Dream says. “I will take it.” He clenches around Hob as if to emphasize the point, body spasming. Held open and full.
‘Pain is good’ is not exactly what Hob meant, but Dream is overdramatic like that and he does like a little pain, sometimes.
In the morning Hob will take him in his mouth, bring him off with easy heat and agonizing slow pleasure. Then he’ll roll on top of him, fuck him through the afterglow, erase that soreness with a slow, easy stretch that melds right into him. Kiss him and move in him until Dream comes twice, at least.
Now, he twists his grip around Dream and thumbs over his slit in the way he knows will make him come, and grips his hip hard enough to leave bruises, and Dream cries out at the force, spilling over his hand.
Hob doesn’t slow. He takes Dream’s hips in both hands again, holds him there as he fucks into his tight, oversensitive body. So tight after, always, as if whatever arousal unlocked gets timid again in the aftermath. Hob would feel like more of a dick for loving it if Dream didn’t seem to get off on it, too.
“So fucking tense, baby,” he says, pressing Dream to the sheets again, mouthing at the back of his neck. His skin tastes like oil. Dream trembles under him. “Should I stay in you longer? Maybe I should make you wait. Keep you on my cock until you get used to it.”
“Yes,” Dream says. “Mold me to you.”
Hob fucks him harder, down into the bed, and Dream gasps at each stretch. Hob won’t last much longer like this. He’s surprised he lasted this long.
“Come back to me in the morning,” he says, “and we’ll keep practicing.”
And Dream moans, and that’s enough for Hob. With several quick stutters of his hips, he spills in him, Dream’s muscles going all tense under him at the feeling. Then he falls boneless over Dream’s back, and stays like that, in him, keeping a promise, or perhaps a threat, for a time.
“I love when you get like that,” Dream murmurs, eyes heavy-lidded. Shifting against where Hob is going soft inside him.
“How?”
“Wanting me,” Dream says.
“I always want you,” Hob says.
“You know what I mean.”
Yeah, Hob does, and it’s not really what he intended for an easy, relaxing evening, though Dream has relaxed under him. But this intensity, this roughness, no matter how much they both love it, hadn’t been what he had been aiming for at the start. He hadn’t even been angling for sex at all at the start.
And now Hob is picking up on the pattern that he’s been pushing aside each time it comes up. The way Hob will try to do something nice for him and Dream will spin it around into sex. After that event in the Dreaming. After Hob had fed him. He had been attributing it just to passion, but… maybe that’s not the whole truth.
He finally pulls out, trying not to relish too much in Dream’s groan at the feeling, and goes to clean him up with quick, practiced motions. Dream just hums, still sprawled out, loose and spoiled. Hob cuddles back up to him, turning him on his side and pulling Dream flush to his body, Dream’s back to his chest. He knows from experience that it’s the best position if he wants to get real, personal answers out of him, because Dream won’t have to look him in the eye as he says them.
“Do you not like,” he starts, thinking it through as he speaks, lips to the back of Dream’s neck, “when we do just… simple things other than sex?”
Dream stiffens immediately, which perhaps was inevitable. Hob holds him tight so he won’t slip away. “If you are dissatisfied with our lovemaking—”
“Not what I said.” He kisses under Dream’s ear. “Don’t jump to conclusions, eh?”
But jumping is how Dream’s mind works, Hob knows. It’s not for dreams to be linear, but to create zigzag webs of meaning, clouds of abstraction. Feelings layered and refracted.
“Are—” he starts, a thought occurring. “Are you unsatisfied?”
“No,” says Dream, but Hob isn’t convinced by it. He doubts Dream would let him do something he didn’t like—Hob hadn’t even gotten away with calling him a friend the first time without getting a reaction—but that doesn’t mean he would speak up about what he does want.
“I do enjoy such things you speak of,” Dream says before Hob can push. “‘Simple things.’ Nice… things.”
“Well. I’m glad, then. Only you… do turn it into sex. A lot. And I’m not doing ‘nice things’ just to get you into bed, you know.”
“Such temptations are not necessary for that, historically,” Dream says, with some of his rare humor. Hob can imagine the tiny smirk on his lips, and leans over to kiss the corner of his mouth.
“Temptations, huh?” he says, still close to Dream’s cheek, and Dream blushes. Just the barest amount, but any flush is easily visible on his pale skin. “My attempts at strange ice cream flavors really did it for you?”
“You made it for me,” Dream says. His voice is quiet like the hush of light rain.
Hob squeezes him to his chest. “You talk like no one’s ever done something just nice for you in a relationship.”
“Do not jump to conclusions,” Dream says, echoing him with a twitch of the lips. “But such small signs of care… it is a human thing. I am unused to that. I am… a medium through which fantasies are spun. Not a creature to be made tea and ice cream.”
“What if my fantasy is making you tea and ice cream?” Hob says. His heart hurts at the thought of it being foreign to Dream, even if he knows some of it is just his nature as an Endless, that Dream has had some good relationships, at least for the time that they lasted, and that supernatural creatures can have different ways of showing care—hell, he’s seen it with Dream himself—but still—
“You are turning my words upon themselves,” Dream says, but seems to find it humorous. “I suppose that because I am unused to it, such things unduly affect me. Is it a surprise, then, that I should want you so when you do them?”
“Are you saying those things make you horny?” Hob’s voice pitches up several notches. Dream actually squirms in his arms, as if to wiggle away back into stardust.
“I do not care for that word to be applied to me,” he says.
“You are, though,” Hob says. God, the fact that he seems to get turned on by simple care and kindness in a relationship is both sweet, hot, and terribly sad all at once. But with Dream naked in his arms he’s leaning more towards hot.
Dream doesn’t answer, and Hob leans over to catch his eye. “Hey, Dream. Look at me?” Dream still doesn’t, so Hob takes his chin and tugs until Dream finally turns his gaze to him. He looks almost… ashamed.
“Hey.” Hob lets his hand fall to a gentler hold, cradling Dream’s cheek. “None of that. Would think you were talking about tentacle porn, the way you look.”
Hob does not actually think Dream would be ashamed of tentacle porn. No, it’s only this.
“Humans only see tentacle sex as ‘kinky’ because you do not know any sentient beings with tentacles,” Dream says.
Hob stares at him for several long moments. Has to shake himself hard to reset. “That’s another conversation,” he says, and Dream gives half a smile, enough that it breaks that look on his face. Laughing at Hob’s meager human experience. He’ll take it.
“What I’m saying is,” he continues, “you don’t have to be ashamed. It’s sweet, really.”
Dream finally turns over properly on his back so Hob no longer has to lean over his shoulder. Hob takes advantage of it to lean in and kiss him, slow and lingering, and when he pulls away Dream is looking at him with his pupils wide and his mouth wet and parted, a look that begs another kiss and another of anything Hob’s willing to give him. Which is much.
“You can have whatever you want,” Hob murmurs. “Any other desires you’ve been keeping close to the chest?”
Dream shakes his head. “It is not about elaborate fantasy. I can make any sexual fantasy a reality in the Dreaming. But.” His gaze slants down. “I cannot make someone love me.”
“Oh, darling.” Hob kisses him again, soft and sweet this time. “I want to give that to you, don’t you know? All the time.”
“I am coming to that awareness,” says Dream, softly. “And perhaps we might… do more. Of these ‘simple nice things’ that you speak of.”
“Because it turns you on?” Hob says, but it’s just teasing now.
“Among other reasons,” murmurs Dream, and leans his head against Hob’s.
There’s nothing Hob wants more than to give him those things. The chance to see Dream happy is the sweetest gift he can imagine. His own ‘nice thing,’ perhaps, though nothing about it feels simple.
For now, he cuddles Dream close, rubbing his hand up and down his spine. Dream makes a rumbling, purring sound of pleasure, and presses into him, nose tucked against Hob’s throat. Hob loves him so much it makes his chest hurt, a sweeter version of the wound he’d felt during all of Dream’s long absence.
I’ll make you so used to nice mundane things you’ll get fucking bored, Hob thinks. Though there are a lot of nice, ordinary things—life’s made up of them—so it might take a long time.
Fortunately, Hob has a long time.
****
The next time Hob makes Dream dinner—actual dinner this time, not just ice cream, partly because he’s too weak to handle the image of Dream licking ice cream off his fingertips again—he just pulls Dream to the bedroom afterwards to cuddle. He wants to show Dream a quiet evening, to let him feel good without plan or expectation. And by the way Dream slides into bed beside him, presses up against Hob’s body, skin to skin, just his underwear on, and then rests there like it’s where he belongs, Hob thinks he gets the message.
Dream’s form is warm and alluring against him, but Hob doesn’t feel the need to push it further towards sex. The contented hum of Dream’s body at his side is its own form of satisfaction. The pleasure he can draw in him just by holding him close. Dream is calm and pleased and happy, and while they’ll surely slide into sex later, or maybe just tomorrow morning, if Dream stays that long, for now this is more than enough.
The slow build of pleasure as he strokes his hand through Dream’s hair and down over his back. The brush of Dream’s feathery hair against his jaw as he tucks his head further into Hob’s throat with a sigh. Dream is clearly pleased, Hob can feel that he’s hard against his thigh, but he seems content to just let it be for now, to relish in those early, warm moments of arousal. He really just wanted to be petted and spoiled and adored all along, Hob thinks with a smile. And how long has Hob wanted to spoil and adore him?
Hob’s just about to fall asleep, still lightly stroking Dream’s hair, when Dream’s head snaps up in the direction of the hallway, like a cat that’s spotted a fly buzzing around in the dark. “Sibling,” he calls, “I can sense your irritating presence. Reveal yourself, or suffer the consequences.”
“Ooh, consequences. I’m just shaking in my Louboutins,” says Desire, swanning out of the shadows, eyes glinting. Hob, properly awake now, gets the sense that they’re about to have a very odd conversation, here in his bedroom, in the middle of the night. Never a normal fucking tea in this family.
“What are you doing here,” Dream says flatly. “You aren’t welcome.”
He hasn’t moved from where he’s still curled against Hob, Hob notes with a little thrill.
“The level of horny wafting off this flat is revolting, I simply had to come see what you were getting up to.” Desire leans in the doorway, head in their hand, and looks the two of them up and down, face falling in what looks like genuine disappointment. “Are you fucking… cuddling? Are you— are you petting his disgusting hair?”
“Fuck off, Desire,” Hob says mildly, and Dream smiles smugly.
"Unbelievable," complains Desire. "The utter disrespect upon my realm."
"You are simply jealous that my lover is the most alluring in all the land," says Dream, and kisses Hob on the nose, then on his closed eye, then on the cheek. "Isn't he a sweetheart?”
Desire blinks at them several times in disbelief. Rubs their eyes. Looks again. "Nope, turns out I really did just witness that."
They manifest a cigarette, and take a long pull, leaning their forehead against the doorframe like the weight of the world is upon their shoulders. Then they straighten up, shaking it off.
“Well, I see you've done a swan dive off the deep end. I'll leave you to your demise. Don't call me unless you've decided to try some pet play or something else even marginally respectable."
"I shan't be inviting you to that," says Dream.
"Didn't invite you this time," mutters Hob.
"Lies. Foul lies. I know all. I see—” they point at them ominously— “all. Even though I'm wishing more and more that I did not. Sayonara, you puritan fucks."
And they disappear.
Hob breaks down laughing, tucking his face into Dream's shoulder.
Dream caresses his cheek. “What is it?”
"Oh, just. Kink-shamed by the embodiment of Desire itself. That's all."
Dream pouts. “It is not like Desire to kink shame. I assure you, I could have taken the form of a human and engaged in some real human fucking and they would still have taken issue because it was me.”
“Is that— uh,” Hob frowns. “Is that considered— kinky?”
Dream looks at him seriously. “Very.”
“Huh.” Hob ponders this strange little tidbit about immortal creatures’ lives. “Oh, is that right?”
Dream casts him a warning glance. “Do not do anything untoward with that knowledge.”
“Oh, I’m definitely going to do something untoward with that. You kinky bastard, you.”
Dream sighs as if exhausted, yet unsurprised by Hob’s antics. “Many do seem to think so,” he admits.
“This is the best information I have ever learned,” Hob decides. “You know, darling, if you wanted to have terribly spicy human sex, you only had to ask.”
“You may come to regret that offer,” Dream warns, but he settles back against Hob’s side with a satisfied hum.
“Nah.” Hob already has far too many ideas for that. Many more things to add to the list of human experiences he can show Dream. Not all of them quite so wholesome as dinner and cuddling. Indeed, there are many different types of ‘nice things’ to be had, and more than one fun way to spoil him. “I don’t think so.”
And while he’s at it… maybe he’ll ask Dream about that whole tentacles thing, too. If they’re in the process of exchanging kinks, and all.
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