melonbrother

[ovinetanuki]

un-privating some posts so if if you get pinged sorry i guess

[bunny-hoodlum]

Asynchronous With You: Ch 4

Hinata had no idea what she was doing following this child around, being lead from booth to booth, watching her pick up snacks and play games as they went. She was asked if she wanted a taiyaki, but she hadn't the stomach for it. She was asked if she wanted to help win her a plushie, but she was too numb to respond.

Everyone was looking at them.

Her classmates made comments in passing.

"Hey, I didn't know you had a sister!"

"Whoa, shocker! You're not an only child?"

"Huh? Who's that?"

"Guess Hyuuga-san can't be mysterious and secretive forever."

And then there was Naruto's face angled above the river of bodies, wide, open eyes filled with confusion and concern.

She ducked her head down. At the same time, Hanabi tugged at her skirt and pointed at another booth ahead. Following her lead her closer to Naruto, who began to push his way through to reach her.

His prescence is always like the sun, at times warm and welcoming, other times overbearing. Suffocatingly hot, in fact. Like now. Like she's been abandoned without her shoes, wandering barefoot on an asphalt desert, and here he is bearing down on her, unrelenting.

Several takes are made between Hanabi and herself. He's assessing with his own eyes and verifying it against their history.

"How old is she?" He murmurs.

Hinata releases a shaky sigh. "Ten. Her birthday's in March."

And Kurenai had taken them in the summer before. Her parents must have gotten pregnant again shortly after.

They both watched as Hanabi grasped the baseball and threw her arm back. After a couple near misses, she finally got it through the 300pt hole. Hinata clapped, but it was hollow and robotic. This obvious show of pain only earned her more of his attention, and that pained her too.

Hanabi skipped over to them, another palm-sized plushie added to the others hooked inside her left arm. Her cunning upturned eyes widened upon seeing Naruto standing so closely to her Onee-san.

"Is that your boyfriend?"

Naruto froze up, a hand reached behind his head as he sputtered to explain without making things weird.

"He's someone that was nice to me in grade school," Hinata said coolly.

"Uh, yeah," The right half of Naruto's face pinched in mild disagreement, finding her answer a bit more impersonal than he was going for.

"What? That's all?" Hanabi's open-mouth frown made her look like the goldfish she tried to scoop earlier. She seemed visibly bored by this revelation.

Hinata also caught an indignant look from Naruto, whose eyes seemed to ask 'Yeah, that's all?'.

"Oh, I forgot," She met his stare, "You're trying to befriend the whole school by graduation." It wasn't code. He was almost obsessively expanding his contacts every day. He wanted to appear in every school photo for the yearbooks. He wanted the empty spaces so dense with inside jokes, fond wishes and signatures that no one could ever say he was unpopular and unloved.

"Hell yeah. And I'm halfway there, too."

It was Hanabi's turn to read the air between them as she glanced from person to person. A good-humored smirk curved her lips. "Looks like you have a long ways to go with Onee-san. Well, nice meeting you!" She grabbed Hinata's hand and began to drag her away, waving her flummoxed acquaintance goodbye. Hinata didn't even resist.

Naruto watched her disappear through the throng, as irritation and discomfort took seat inside his chest. She's walking around like a puppeted corpse and she gives him attitude?! His sigh transforms into a drawn out growl as he mentally works through the wrongness he feels. He comes out of it calmer, sympathy renewed.

She's simply not acting like herself. He has to forgive her for that.

As her brother, and the only one that's around, he has to fix this.

Otherwise, what is he good for?

______________________________

He had determined to find her again later in the day, when her sister surprise was no longer sucking the soul out of her.

And he does find her later, when the sky is a guava-mango sorbet dimming darker, and the school halls are shadowed in sleepy silence.

She's found a place to be alone, in a stairwell that hardly anybody uses.

Well, except himself. And a few others.

It's a great place for a post-lunchtime quickie.

It's not a hundred-percent guarantee to be unoccupied, but it's kind of a well-guarded school secret.

Now that he thinks about it, as she sits there much like his other catches have, and he's coming to meet her when everyone's gone, it leaves him feeling... exposed and shameful. Like they're both here for unsavory reasons.

A flash of a memory intrudes on him, of baby-soft, plump white skin that refused to be buttoned up in the shirt he shrank, bouncing with the force to cause an earthquake in his room, that tight-lined cleavage taunting him.

It took him weeks to look her in the face again, and he thinks about it now?!

He smacks his cheeks until he's regained stoic resolve. But then something else nags at him.

What if she was here, and she was waiting for someone else?

No one's invited her over here yet, he would know.

But they could. And when they did...

He shakes off these burdensome thoughts like a wet dog.

No one in this school has their eye on his sister. He would know that, too.

And he wouldn't allow it.

He can't think of a damn soul that's good enough for her.

So hardworking, so generous, so considerate and patient. Plus she was smart, she cooks better than Kurenai-obasan, and she's an amazing listener.

She's just so, so amazing.

And yet, stuff like this happens.

She's like the smallest thing to ever exist, that's what she looks like right now. As if he could scoop her up with both hands and still lose her between the cracks of his palms.

Just like when they first met.

Neji's voice rises up in the back of his mind. "You're the only one I can ask."

He's got a lot of experience cheering her up and making her feel safe, and this time will be no different.

Or so he thought.

When she looks up at him, he feels transparent. Her brow is furrowed like it doesn't make sense for him to be here.

"Can you take me to the train station?" She asks unblinkingly, thin tears escaping from the inner corners.

His mind goes a mile a minute with speculation, but he'd already been planning on saying 'yes' to her no matter what she had asked of him.

______________________________

They're taking the train to Neji's private high school. It's way pass curfew, so there's no visiting him at his dorm, but they're going to try.

Naruto can't talk to her because she's fully turned towards the window. Instead he takes this free time to picture himself in her situation. That he has family somewhere out there, and siblings he's never met. That they lived their lives without him. Maybe even erased his existence from their story. No photographs, no baby book.

Was Hinata even still on their family registry?!

He folded over and clutched his head, groaning. "This is so fucked. How could they do this to you?!"

For the past six hours, she's been asking herself the same thing.

She was also asking for Hanabi's sake, those fragile words ringing over and over in the back of her mind.

"Do you think I'm a redo?"

Hinata squeezed her eyes shut tight.

Because there are no redos without mistakes.

______________________________

AN: Sorry, this is only 800 words! D: I'll probably combine this with the previous chapter as well when I post it to AO3. Or maybe it's somehow fine as is? Like an Interlude? I also wanted to write that heartwrenching scene between Hanabi and Hinata and get some exposition out of the way, but today it felt tedious. :( I wish I had written it when I originally wanted to, lol.

That aside, I'm not totally happy with the flow of the middle scene, it just feels maybe... distracted? or disjointed? Hmm... tangential?

Plus I couldn't seem to dig very deep into Naruto's reactions and like, the logical progression of his emotions. I feel I just skimmed the surface. Oh wait, maybe it's because he ought to be belligerently outspoken about this stuff, right? （・□・；）

Sometimes I think I really miss the ball when writing Naruto cuz I subdue him to be more 'normal' and have enough situational awareness to get by on. (눈_눈)

[everything-laito]

if I don’t have tendinitis by the end of writing this series, I am officially immortal. anyways here’s the long awaited Laito and Cordelia analysis: Part I

Hi, Corn here! Holy shit I’ve been wanting to write this for forever now; idk how long this series will be but uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I’m gonna wing it.

Lemme get something REAL clear before I begin. Because for some fucking reason I still see people trying to say that Cordelia did not molest/rape/etc Laito. Cuz she did. It’s called grooming and manipulation, sweetie. And I’ll explain that too. 

Also, I’m not defending or justifying Cordelia’s actions (there’s a difference between explaining why something happens and defending it. For example, we know racism is harmful and awful, but explaining what it is and why it happens isn’t defending it). I also don’t defend Laito’s nonconsensual or abusive actions either on here, I also wanna clarify that. I just merely explain his theorized rationale and psyche.

God I don’t even know where to start, or where this is exactly going to end, but my god, time to pop off. I’m going to divide this into sections as well. 

Also I think this is usually a given with all the Laito stuff I put on here, but, spoilers ahead! And trigger warnings galore! Pedophilia/rape/abuse/grooming/depression/anxiety are the ones I can think of now, but all of those are really a given on this blog. Just wanna emphasize it because I’m gonna go deep into em. 

As always,,,,, rant under the cut~!

Section 1: Before the Storm (insert Life is Strange joke here)

There’s quite a bit of back and forth about where Cordelia started doing this. I just finished Dark Fate and the conversation between the triplets caught my eye. Laito mentions in his Dark Fate Ecstacy Epilogue that implies Cordelia wasn’t abusive at first. It’s revealed how Karlheinz used Cordelia just for his Adam and Eve experiment to create a new human race, which is why he blatantly ignores her after courting her and making her have kids that she didn’t even wanna have. Which is. Yikes. I’d say that’s a form of coercive pregnancy abuse.

The conversation turns to Laito who then says that Cordelia lost her mind due to of sexual frustration and then hurt the triplets. Sexual frustration is a real and common thing, but I’m gonna explain the potential logistics of this being turned into abuse. 

Sexual frustration in general can be described as a sense of “dissatisfaction stemming from a discrepancy between a person’s desired and achieved sexual activity” (source). I know it’s from Wikipedia but the phrasing of that definition is just too perfect. (also Wikipedia’s good just to get the basics from ;) ) Sexual frustration can happen from physical, mental, emotional, social, religious, or spiritual barriers. Everyone has some kind of ideal sexual activity, whether it be innate and or learned (like getting used to sexual acts over time, whether that be from a traumatic or consensual experience). However, I can safely say that Cordelia has high libido, regardless of the reason. 

Oxytocin, my absolute favorite hormone to talk about, is huge in this case. Touch starvation (what I’d say most of us are going through now because of quarantine) also depends on oxytocin level. We’re social creatures, and we need touch in some way. Having sexual needs is also not a thing to be shameful of (if you do have them), since that is also very human and very biological. Oxytocin is needed for so many things! From social bonding, sexual bonding, reproduction in general, and general emotional wellbeing. Everyone has different levels of oxytocin needs. With a lack of oxytocin, whether it causes sexual frustration or touch starvation (or both), it can create fear, anxiety, and or depression. This has to do with my favorite part of the brain, the amygdala. It’s this lil almond shaped part (hence, amygdala, which is Latin for “almond”) is responsible for empathy, your fight and flight response, as well as SO many other things. I’ll talk more about the amygdala later, because I’m getting off track. 

Back to the logistics of oxytocin deficiency and abuse. Basically, I didn’t initially think that touch starvation or sexual frustration could get so bad that someone would resort to abuse. Haven’t found anything that supports that either. However, since it is linked to depression and stress, I do believe Cordelia would have other underlying psychological issues that made her response to depression and stress just so much worse. It’s kind of obvious that Karlheinz absurd her, and when someone goes through a traumatic episode, there’s different coping mechanisms or different emotions are triggered. Maybe even before Karlheinz she had issues, but we will never know. I just know that Cordelia seems susceptible to some kind of manic episodes, such as mood swings and intense behaviors. 

Dark Fate confirms that Karlheinz most likely used this, and used Cordelia due to her Founder blood and that her psyche was “optimal” to eventually have the triplets kill her. Karl can see the future and past etc, I believe that was confirmed in Lost Eden too. Anyways, all of this paves the way to what Cordelia did to the triplets.

Section 2: The Beginning

There’s been quite a bit of back and forth between when did Cordelia start sexually abusing Laito? We know that Kanato and Ayato were abused when they were young, but there’s no flashbacks in Laito’s routes that depicts him being a child (to my knowledge). Not saying Laito wasn’t abused when he was a child, but I can assure you that the first time Cordelia had explicit sex with Laito was when he was older. 

Special thanks to @vampiretsuki​ and @amiecris​ for helping me think this through on Zara’s server! 

There hasn’t been any flashbacks that specifically show us the first time that happened. However, I believe that there was a flashback in HDB that shows one of the first times. Here’s a scene from Laito’s Dark Epilogue:

Cordelia: ー Laito…Laito… Laito: …Hm? Is something the matter? Cordelia: I have a favor to ask. It just isn’t enough. You can do it, right Laito? Laito: You really are something…So that’s why you came to me again? Cordelia: Fufufu…That’s right, Laito. Come on, quickly… Laito: …Guess it can’t be helped. I’ll love you plenty. Cordelia: Aah…My cute Laito~ I love you. I really do. Laito: I can do it…right? Cordelia: Of course, Laito. Now, quickly…

First of all, ew. Second of all, Laito’s diction implies that this was maybe the second or third time this occurred. He asks a question, and ends it with “again.” We know by this that it is not the first time, but the question also means that Laito might not have expected to occur again. His tone also implies some surprise to it, at least in my ears. His other question, “I can do it, right?” screams hesitance to me. If this scene took place down the line, or after many times he did this with Cordelia, I don’t believe he’d be some level of surprised or hesitance. 

Now, you may be thinking, “Oh! What about Ayato and Laito’s Versus II CD?! Didn’t it mention that Laito wasn’t in the triplet’s shared bed 9/10 times?!” And yeah, if you remembered that, kudos to you! Yes, you’re totally right. I thought this was some inconsistent writing, but I don’t believe so. I believe Cordelia was grooming Laito as a kid. For some reason, grooming never came to my mind, it was Tsuki who mentioned grooming, and Cris also backed that notion up. It’s not confirmed if Cordelia planned to do this to Laito in the beginning (which I doubt, I think she sexually exploited him on a whim due to sexual frustration and because Karl wouldn’t; and the suitors she had wasn’t “enough” for her) but I think it’s implied that it happened (from the earlier excerpt). As for grooming, here’s an excerpt from the VS II CD:

Ayato: You weren’t even there 9 out of the 10 times. Laito: So you knew, Ayato-kun. Ayato: … Laito: You know, I have been thinking how I came to be the person I am today. I am still wondering why wasn’t it Ayato-kun or Kanato-kun.

God that’s so SAAAD! This is why Laito being groomed from a young age would make sense. It would also make sense as to why he was so dismissive and hesitant to help Ayato out. In Ayato’s flashbacks, Laito is there, but doesn’t interfere when Cordelia gets into the picture. Laito tends to run away from his problems, and this manifests even when he’s a kid. To further the support of the claim, it’s definitely not farfetched that Cordelia would do something to a child, especially her own child. She used Kanato for his singing voice when she was having sex..... yikes. That’s another form of sexual exploitation. So uh, let’s dive right into see what grooming does,,,,, *opens another private window* Here’s the source I’ll be using too. 

Grooming is a process that is typically used to sexually exploit children. Ewewewewewewew. It can be a quick or gradual process. It’s basically harnessing the trust in children utilizing constant contact. There’s not much explicit evidence describing this with Cordelia, but if Laito wasn’t sexually exploited when he was younger in the fashion he was “used” to when he got older, again I do think he was groomed. It would make sense as to why he either avoided conflict with Cordelia as a child. Either that was his own disposition (which to a degree I think it is), or maybe he was confused about Cordelia’s actions towards his other brothers, since he “loved” Cordelia. Young Laito typically fell silent when Cordelia entered the room, which again could be because of his disposition, fear, or he knows not to say much in front of her. 

During the grooming process, a child can result in not being able to see coercion and deception. In general, kids 7 years old and under biologically are not able to differentiate persuasion from their own decisions, which results in the laws surrounding advertisements catering to children. Fun fact. I know we’re dealing with vampires and so their brains might not work like that, but from what I’ve seen, they’re pretty human. Also, we’re still not sure about their ages or how vampire biological ages work, but bear with me on this. 

Another stage of grooming involves cutting off the child’s support system, whether it be family, friends, etc. I made a comment in an analysis that Laito doesn’t have a support system, and at the very least, his brothers. But even that is pretty weak. You know how it’s mentioned how Laito wasn’t even in bed with Ayato and Kanato most of the time? That’s probably due to Cordelia weakening Laito’s bonds with them. Furthermore, on the website I’m using to get information from, it says this:

Control and alienation is exercised in the following ways:

[more bullet points here]

- creating conflicting feelings of love and hate, protection and exploitation, guilt and innocence, entitlements and duties.

OOOOOHHHHHH BBBBBOOOOOYYYYYY!!!!! Ayato and Kanato say that they fucking hate Cordelia. But... Laito’s the only one that says he “loves” her. He also says that he hates her. So, from this, I think it might be safe to say that Cordelia groomed Laito as a child, and continued to use those tactics when he was older.

Well, I’m gonna end it here for part one. That was quite the ride, but I hope you enjoyed nonetheless! Next part, we’ll be getting into Laito when he’s older and the effects it had on him, along with some other crazy dark sides of psychology. I still won’t be answering many of my inbox questions until this huge analysis is finished, sorry! I kinda wanna focus on this first. But feel free to hit me up with any questions! I’ll still get to them :)

Any Cordelia/Laito questions will most likely be answered in this series, just a heads up. But if you have any questions pertaining to Cordelia/Laito right now or after the series, feel free to hit me up still! Any clarifying questions for this post or anything in general are always encouraged as well if you’re confused or want me to elaborate on something :)

Part two is planned to be up next week! See ya then ;) -Corn

[feminaexlux]

5 Minutes

Part 2 of Miraculous Leap

Btw I'm heavily referencing We Have a Problem by @verfound 'cuz I can take partial ownership of Dewey hehehe. Ages are fudged around for convenience

AO3 link

⁂

As soon as he left the bedroom and was out of sight Luka felt his knees start to buckle and he let himself slump to the floor. Hopefully she didn't hear that. A minute ago he'd been reaching for his bracelet to set Second Chance but then Ladybug collided into him and they were sent tumbling to the ground. When he had opened his eyes he found…

He was almost dead certain that it was Marinette propping herself up over him. Even if she looked older he wouldn't have mistaken those eyes for anyone else's. Those eyes looked as surprised as he was. While she had moved over to his side to sit up he had taken a quick scan of the room and of her. She looked… very curvy? … And pregnant. It was incredibly… well. There'd been a mix of feelings he couldn't put words to.

But the room? Deep down inside, he had an odd sense of being at home. And as he took some deep, meditative breaths to control his heartrate he knew whatever this was, it wasn't a dream. It had too much… certainty and realness to it.

Marinette was looking panicked, so he had offered to get some water. He needed some water himself. He also needed to leave the room so he could freak out in private and not upset her any more than she was already, and that was why he was more or less faceplanted on the floor out of view right now.

What was the akuma? It had some ability to see the future, which was why Viperion was called out to help Ladybug and Chat Noir in the first place. No one on the Miraculous team had known that it had the power to send people into the future, however. Luka was sure that was what had happened. Ladybug and Viperion got hit with the akuma's blast and… now Marinette and Luka were here, in their future. ONE future, he should say.

It wasn't necessarily set in stone. Luka knew how much could change in just 5 minutes.

He knew Marinette was Ladybug. Marinette might try to convince him she wasn't Ladybug if it ever came up. He'd have to roll with it and make her as comfortable as he could. Or maybe he could steer the conversation away from that in the first place. She might never call on him to be Viperion again if he told her that he knew and had known for a while.

Because even if Marinette had always looked over Luka for Adrien, Luka wanted to spend whatever time he could with her, in her super Miraculous suit or in her normal everyday clothes.

He got back up on his feet and sighed to himself, looking into the different rooms he passed as he meandered his way blindly toward a kitchen. There were a few rooms that had been for kids, he thought. He walked by what looked like Marinette's crafting workshop, full of partially dressed mannequins and half-finished projects and colorful children's drawings. A hallway he passed through was full of pictures of kids he didn't recognize, but they all had a strong familiarity.

Probably because they were his kids. His and Marinette's. He could hardly believe it, but his older self and Marinette's older self were there throughout most of the pictures too.

One thing caught his attention outside of the kids' pictures: a flatscreen in a large ornate frame playing a soundless video in the center of the hallway wall. It was of him and Marinette on what looked like their wedding day. He had swept her up off her feet in her wedding dress and she had her arms wrapped around his shoulders. She had been laughing and then had leaned in to kiss him.

Luka watched that replay a few times. They looked happy. He hoped that future Marinette didn't have any regrets.

After the replays he realized that they didn't look that old in the clip. Well, not much older than they were… now? Before the akuma? Definitely not teenagers anymore, but not more than a few years after they both left their teens.

So how did he manage to get all this? What happened that let Marinette finally see him? Did his future self leave any hints?

Last he knew of anything, Marinette had come back to the Liberty from her class' New York trip and admitted to the GirlSquad™️ (while Luka was within earshot) that she was still in love with Adrien. "I-I mean there's plenty of reasons to love him… he's so cute and talented and smart and--and… and I think everyone keeps saying we were made for each other but… but it's so hard," Marinette had groaned. "Why is it so hard?"

Luka had made his presence known so he wouldn't be unintentionally eavesdropping something he wasn't supposed to. Any more than was already said, anyway. He had started to leave when Rose stopped him then. "Luka! You're a boy! You know what boys think! What do you think is going on with Adrien?"

Luka had laughed and said he didn't know. "What I know is that it isn't supposed to be easy. It's something you have to keep working on. But it's supposed to lift you up and make you feel stronger." He then left the girls in their plotting/scheming/arguing to lounge back in his room. He had been surprised when a few minutes later Marinette came to join him.

"It doesn't make me feel stronger. I just feel dumb," Marinette said then, quietly. He had let her stay with him while he played random songs on his guitar, trying to cheer her up. She had finally started smiling again when he played her song, except with a little bit more flare and bubblegum pop. It was what he heard in his head when she was happy. "Thank you. You know, I feel less dumb being here with you."

He finally reached something like a kitchen. It'd been huge and there were clear boxy canisters of different types of flours and sugars and mix-ins… He saw a high end mixer and maybe 30 different types of baking sheets. Looked like Marinette still put her baking knowledge to use.

Alright enough being distracted, he shouldn't leave Marinette alone too long. He grabbed two clean glasses and got water from the fridge's built in dispenser and headed back the way he came.

"I brought some water for you." He was a little worried when he saw her on the floor. He had no idea what it was like being pregnant but it couldn't have been easy… "Hey, are you doing okay?"

Marinette took the water gratefully. "I don't know… Are… are you Luka Couffaine?" He nodded. "Huh, just a few minutes ago I was 14, and now it looks like I'm 34. And your wife."

There was something to her voice… she wasn't horrified, which was good news. There'd still been some confusion, maybe? And a little disbelief. That was as much as could be expected from Marinette, Luka supposed.

He was pretty sure she was Marinette, but it would be all kinds of messed up if he just found someone who looked a lot like her. It'd been her art, her designs, her baking… right? No one else could just… be all that she was. He had to be sure. "Are you Marinette?"

She looked up at him with her light blue eyes. It had to be Marinette. There'd been a wave of relief that washed over him when she nodded.

"I think this is our future," she said.

⁂

(Meanwhile…)

Luka blinked and… all of a sudden his wife had a Ladybug mask on. He hadn't seen that on her for months now (he had the Ladybug Miraculous since she was pregnant) which was the first clue that something had rudely interrupted them. He groaned internally and tried to mentally ping Sass or Tikki to see if there was anything to worry about. Marinette looked as bewildered as he was. He took her shoulders and gently pressed them both up to sitting.

Okay, well, she was… she was definitely not pregnant and therefore not his Marinette. Then he noticed he was suited up as Viperion. Ah, it ssseemsss you have been… regressssed, Massster, Sass said in his head. God, Marinette looked… what, 15? And Sass hadn't called him "Master" in forever.

Do you know what happened? Luka asked Sass.

There is an akuma who controlsss time. Well, of course. Their power has ssswapped you with your younger ssself, Sass answered.

Luka had to stop himself from laughing. His younger self was in for one hell of a surprise. That aside, he had to check on this Marinette. "Hey, are you okay?"

Ladybug looked up at him and brushed through his hair with her fingers. "Viperion? Your hair… It's so short…? Wait… wait wh--where's…" She looked down at herself and patted her stomach. "D-D-Dew--"

Oh, Dewey. Viperion pulled Ladybug in for a hug as she started crying. She was his Marinette and… and their son was in the future, not here with them. "He's alright. He's waiting for us. We're somehow in the past, but we'll get back home."

Well, shit, that meant that the younger Marinette was in the future as well.

"I-I-I thought I had l-lost him," Ladybug said quietly, her voice breaking.

"Hey… guys…" Chat said awkwardly after landing nearby. "Milady! What's wrong?!"

Right. Chat Noir. At 15. This was going to be annoying as fuck.

[heckinhacker]

Heyy may i request bff headcanons for Kyle, Cartman, Craig & Tweek? If that’s too much characters, then just Kyle please :)

Kyle, Cartman, Craig and Tweek - Best Friends Forever headcanons!

A/N: Honestly, south park is rare on this blog so no, no problem at all! Wanted to write it sooner but writer’s block T~T’ 

Rest is under the cut cuz it might get long-

Kyle Broflovski

As I always say, South Park is a shithole and finding some REAL friends might be hard.

Kyle sometimes doubts his own existence, or everyone else’s. Literally. That’s how bizzare things are happening here. 

He cannot trust anybody, maybe Stan only. But sometimes he doubts him too. (Brutal truth) 

So seeing someone honestly concerned about him, and being stubborn at it, would make him soften up pretty quickly. 

As long as you’re not a Cartman, you’re fine. 

Maybe he didn’t start right off bat to spill his secrets out, but he invited you to hang outs more often when he realised you’re fine. 

The most of trust he shows when he invites you over his place. Without anyone else. Just you two. 

Nothing over-friendly line, you just laugh at stupid youtube videos, share some memes, tell some stories you somewhere read or heard. Friend things. 

If you prefer to stay inside, say goodbye to the comfort of your room. Kyle LOVES long walks, and he forces you to go with him. “It’s more healthy than ‘taking a walk’ simulator, [Y/N]!”. 

Long walks - long talks. 

Kyle never shuts up. No matter what. You know something’s wrong when he does. 

Kyle realised you’re his BESTIE FOR LIFE when Hanukkah was hitting close in the calendar. That time of the year he talks to noone since everyone celebrates Christmas. 

But you? You, beside spending time with family, decided to gain some knowledge about Hanukkah. 

You searched in the internet, asked Kyle’s parents, you just tried your best. And decided to surprise your best friend with Hanukkah gifts. Well, if you’re at it, you should get something for his parents and Ike too. 

Your pocket money cried fo mercy, but you had none. 

Everyone expected  your arrival but Kyle. 

And boy, was he emotional?? He had TEARS in his eyes. But he’d never addmit that. 

After that he’s loyal to you as FUCK. 

Anyone picks a fight with you? No need to strain your arms, Kyle is already at it. 

Someone made you sad? Emotional support Kyle right away. 

Cartman always teases you that you love yourselves so much you should date!

But you’re both comfortable with things the way they are now. 

Eric Cartman

From this four? The easiest one to befriend. 

Noone really stays around enough to get to know the deepest of him for him to call someone best friend. 

But here you are. 

Cartman is not very secretive when he likes someone. He just brags and brags about himself and his most private things. Just because he’s that egocentric. 

Not the best of friend material, really? His advices are shitty, mostly he’s the reason you’re sad or hurting, but you just stay beside him anyway, God knows why but he doesn’t. 

When he’s NOT the reason you want to cry, you can sit beside him and cry yourself out, he’d let you lean on his shoulder. Maybe he’d be silent, but he’d hear you out. 

If that’s what you want, he’s more than enough. 

Please don’t be chaotic duo with him one Cartman in South Park is enough.

BUT if you’re as rude as him, South Park is done with you two. You’re inseparable. 

Miss Cartman loves you as much as her own child, she’s just so grateful someone takes care of her Eric and is not here only for...any other reason.

You’re the only one person that Cartman knows that when picks on him and laughs at him, it’s for jokes, never for reals. 

That’s why he’s the most comfortable with you, to be honest. 

Too lazy for walks, but will go out when he has some bigger purpose than just wandering around, doing nothing. 

Craig Tucker

Almost the hardest to befriend. He’d be the most difficult, but we have Tweek on the list. 

Feels bad. 

Noone had any clue WHY are you trying so hard. Even his group sometimes have hard time figuring Craig out. 

He was very cold to you at first. 

He was worried you’d put him through some weird shit, like main four did. And he’d hate that. 

If you want to befriend him, you have to get trust of Token. At least. 

Don’t start with Clyde, Clyde likes everyone (almost), so you’d be nothing new, Craig will still ignore you. 

When Token, on the other hand, says you’re cool, you have to be. Craig would groan, but would try ot hang out with you normally. Well, as normal as he can. 

You knew he acts somehow different, so you held into that thought, trying to get to know him even further. 

“Why are you trying so hard?” - he’d once ask you when you stayed behind, when Craig was packing his things the slowest. You were alone. 

“ Well, you’re always beside people, but you still look alone. That looks like it hurts, so I want to help to stop it.”

“Weird.” he just answered and started walking out of classroom, you beside him. 

Well you weren’t wrong? He bottled his emotions inside, with noone to know about that. Even himself. 

“He’s just like that”, they’d say. 

Maybe he is, but he still has to have some kind of emotions, right? He’s a human being, after all. 

Maybe his emotional needs are not as big as for others, but they do, indeed, exist. 

Best advice giver. Plus he can help you out of panic attack. He’s REALLY good at it. He’s best friends with Tweek after all. 

If you make him actually more than tolerate you, trust me you’re safe and sound with this dude. 

Rely on Craig Tucker. 

He’s a ‘stay inside’ type of dude too. Watch some things together in silence, talk a little but not too much, just...vibing together.

Unlike Tweek, he’s okay to go outside though. To take some photos maybe, take in fresh air. 

Pro tip: never make small talks with him. He hates them. 

Tweek Tweak

my absolute favouritest boi

The hardest to befriend out of everyone. Literally.

He has big, BIG trust issues. 

Don’t force him into anything. Seriously. 

Small steps. Baby steps, even. 

Try to hang around him in Tweek Bro’s. Or at school where others are at. 

Never try to be with him alone at the beggining. Dude will freak out.

He generally freaks out when he notices you being around him most of the time.

“Y-you having any problem?? I’ve got an eye on you, you won’t kidnap me! My friends already know who to suspect when I’m-!”

“Tweek.”

“Wh-What?!”

“I don’t want to kidnap you, man. I just want to see how you’re doing. 

“...oh.” 

Still doesn’t trusts you, but relaxes. You’re in public place, after all. Many other people would see if you’d plan something on him. 

It takes a shitton of time for him to warm up to you. You see every single sign of him trusting you. 

Inviting you to hangouts with friends? Small step. 

Asking if you’d come when he’s working? Even bigger step. 

Damn, noone’s here beside you? He invited only you? Friendship points!! 

You know he considers you as a friend when he invites you over to his house. He never did that. When he asks if you want to come, you almost cry. 

You took your time and got sweetest boy as a friend. 

He notices the smallest changes in you, so when you’re feeling down by even slightest, he’d point that out. 

Advices are almost pointless, he cannot help himself, so helping others is even worse, but he tries to act like Craig acts when you open up to him. 

It’s so noticable you smile right away. Tweek tries his best.

He sometimes gives you free coffee. “It’s on me”, he says. He’s scared of what will his dad say, but you can count it as a payment. He doesn’t get paid for three people’s work on his shoulders, so he has rights to do what he wants. 

Prefers to stay inside. 

Big events and parties are a big no-no. 

He can force himself into big event happening somewhere close to South Park, but parties are NEVER an option. 

I’ll just mention, but boy do I hate Tweek’s surrname?? It feels like he’s a joke but he’s so important to so many people it’s sad-

[bigskydreaming]

I’m literally in love with the way you write Dick and Jason’s dynamic

Thanks, glad to hear that! Personal preferences aside, I honestly do think it just opens up SO many more potential stories if you go with the idea that they did have a brotherly relationship before Jason died, just they didnt get together around Bruce because Dick was still hoping Bruce would make the first move in reaching out to him. Rather than just stick with the usual assumption that because it wasn’t seen on the page, they had barely any interactions and both resented each other for various reasons.

But those reasons all trace back to Bruce, and if you look at them as two people who are united by the common experience of being fish out of water, adapting to the same environment after coming from DRAMATICALLY different origins, able to connect over that and understand each other in a way nobody else really can because nobody else has ever really had to straddle two worlds as definitively as Dick and Jason had to in their formative years....

Like, the big sticking point for me in the Dick vs Jason: The Grudge theory was just that....at the end of the day, these are two boys who grew up with very few loved ones to start with, or having had to deal with the loss of those loved ones.....

But one way or another......are these two specific characters really ones that make sense as wanting to reject the possibility of more family?

They’re connected through Bruce, like it or not, that was never going to change even from before they ever met......and the idea that Dick Grayson and Jason Todd would each be content to waste literal YEARS never even TRYING to connect with the person who was probably most like him and who by all accounts was already his brother in most ways just by way of Bruce...not even to see if maybe they COULD actually be brothers? To have family beyond just Bruce and Alfred? 

Me @ every fic or headcanon that says Dick had Only Child Syndrome and resented Jason because of that: right because Dick Grayson of all people is anti-family. He’s full up with that one guy whose legal guardianship of him has been expired for a couple years and who he hasn’t spoken to since long before then.....nah, why would he want any more or any other family beyond that?

I mean, I absolutely believe that Dick was upset and hurt that Bruce adopted Jason while he’d never even offered to adopt Dick......but Dick has never been one to pass around blame instead of focusing it on its true point of origin. That’s his and Bruce’s issue. And honestly, there are TONS of reasons for Dick to be upset about that, without making it about Jason at all. 

There’s literally no reason for Dick to take it out on Jason ever, if his biggest issue or grievance is that like....it feels like Bruce was just so done with Dick and considered him so out of his life, something like “just added a new kid to the family” didn’t seem like relevant information he should pass on to Dick despite the tenseness between them. When you have to find out from the NEWS that your old family unit just full on up and adopted this kid you’ve never heard of before now without even so much as a phone call.....there’s plenty of cause to feel like this is a message that you’re not really considered part of that family unit anymore, so why would you need to know?

Or like, the fact that Bruce didn’t consider hey I’m thinking of adding another kid to my family that consists of me and the kid I’m so afraid to tell I think of him as a son in case he doesn’t feel the same way, that I’ve sat back and let things get this bad between us and fester.....hey maybe before I issue adoption papers for a second kid, I should think about putting in an equivalent effort at fixing things with my first kid first?

Or why not write Bruce thinking: “Hey if I can’t even fix things with the kid I raised for almost a decade and think of as my own no matter how long its been since I talked to him.....what on Earth makes me think I’m qualified to take on a SECOND child?”

Like....Bruce was the one who held all the power and all the options, Dick had no other option but to go along with whatever Bruce decided Bruce was going to do, and neither did Jason really.....so there’s no real reason in my head that should be a point of contention between them or a reason to resent each other instead of just stressing to them the importance of having significant family ties beyond just Bruce because history clearly showed even at that point that best intentions aside, the man is fallible.

If anything, that should have been common ground!

I think there was like, an initial negative reaction of maybe one night, the first time they met and Dick even though he was prepared for it still had to adjust to the reality of actually seeing this stranger he was irrevocably connected to now by both his names, even if neither was technically his anymore....like to actually SEE him standing there in his old role....that’s gonna hit anybody hard.

But he also would have clearly been able to see that whatever else he may have been, this twelve year old Robin was still a kid, and one who hadn’t had a lot of time to ever be a kid in the first place.....which again, instant camaraderie, because boy could Dick relate.....remember, Dick may have had a happy childhood with his parents before they were murdered but it was also a childhood where he WORKED. He loves being an acrobat, he loved being in the show, but that didn’t mean that it wasn’t WORK, that his childhood didn’t consist of training as long and as regularly as any adult acrobat while everyone else his age was running around playing outside and making friends. And after Bruce took Dick in, most of Dick’s free time was spent being Robin, training as Robin, etc?

Which IMO would have made him take one look at this kid in his old costume, literally standing where he had once stood, stepping into his old shoes.....and I think Dick’s real honest reaction once he brushed aside any kneejerk feeling of pain or bitterness the way he brushes aside all the physical pain he feels when out as Nightwing but refuses to let get in the way of him doing what he has to, doing what’s right....

Nah, Dick would have taken one look at this tiny kid full of fire and bravado but also so clearly eager to please, to be praised, to be told he was doing a good job and even without that he was worth something, his life had value, the world was better just because he existed......

And I think Dick’s bitterness about the situation would have crystallized into him resentfully thinking well B’s not exactly the best about dishing out affection or praise so I’m gonna make sure this little Mini-Me standing there in my old colors looking just as young and small as I must have looked then even if I didn’t realize it at the time....I’m gonna make sure I keep him supplied with a steady diet of “Nice Words and Gestures That Kids Should Grow Up Receiving Regularly.”

Dick has always been a firm believer that the best way to make sure something gets done is to do it yourself.

So yeah, I honestly do think that back during those days, Dick and Jason were thick as thieves when their schedules allowed for it, with it being simultaneously painful and unspoken that they had to like....work around Bruce’s presence so Dick could avoid him, but somewhat softened by the challenge and thrill of two brothers scheming to pull one over on the Big Bad Batdad every time the older brother wanted to take the little brother to go somewhere or do something, like, even just to spoil him rotten.

Cuz really....isn’t that a lot more interesting than ‘oh they barely ever even met back then and it wasn’t great, that’s it, the end’? There’s so much you could do with even just that, from them sneaking Jason out for a fun adventure that’s layered with just a hint of poignant angst because of the unspoken why of him needing to sneak out instead of them just saying hey Bruce, we need some bro time, Jason’s hanging with me this weekend? Or you dial up the angst and layer it with lightness or literally anything between those two points on a spectrum.

There’s so much Secret History potential buried back in those years....adventures they had together and never told anyone about, secrets shared between brothers they never shared elsewhere.....maybe Dick opening up to Jason more than he usually likes to, but here felt it might be the only way to get Jason to do the same, with Dick thus offering up some painful tidbit from his past that he never told even Bruce or Alfred for some reason, if he thinks Jason’s upset about something and needs to vent but will just keep insisting he’s fine unless Dick leads by example and goes first.

There’s so much potential for in-jokes that only the two of them know and everyone else is ENDLESSLY curious about, because everyone always forgets that those two have so much history because it was literally kept out of sight, out of mind, so they could keep it free of the friction that was bound to come of adding Bruce to the mix before their father cleared the air with his eldest first.

So its an easy thing to forget about or overlook, especially since it rarely comes up....but everytime it does rear its head via some private joke only they know or a reference to some event back then that everyone else is kept boxed out of having any context for....that’s the kind of stuff that would drive a family of detectives craszy, because they want to know! What’s the joke??

And yet its likely they’d never ask, because as curious as they are to hear about the mysterious missing years of the first two Wayne children, back when there was literally nobody else present to ask for details.....they never can figure out HOW to ask those questions, not when they’re equally aware of the swiftly hidden expressions of pain or bitterness that flash across the two eldests’ faces after each unearthing of some long-buried treasure they shared between them. Unable to ever escape the fact that each of those treasured moments would forever be followed with an inevitable reminder of why there were so few of those moments, in the end. 

Why those years ended far earlier than they should have, and why their reunion upon Jason’s return was hindered and complicated by Dick’s obligation to other siblings Jason hurt while dealing with Pit after-effects and the lack of a strong support system while swayed to League sympathies...

And of course, ultimately there’s the reality that after the Adventures of Young Dick and Tiny Jason were cancelled far ahead of schedule, and that several year long intermission....by the time everything else was gotten out of the way, the stars of those earlier adventures were as long gone as the adventures themselves. Dick and Jason were both entirely different people by now.....still containing within each of them enough of who they were back then that those memories are kept carefully protected and hidden away, all the more valuable for how few and sparse they are, and how rarely they’re brought out to look at and enjoy.....

But with those vaults buried deeply enough within who Dick and Jason both are these days, that there’s a lot of blood and loss and pain you have to cut through just to reach that vault. There’s no retrieving anything from it without a cost. A cost worth paying, given that they can’t help themselves from calling back to it every now and then, even though they know the inevitable result is going to be end negative and not end positive. But still high enough to give them pause before actually doing so....holding back sometimes so the toll is doled out sparingly and over time. Getting greedy and trying to bring out/back/up too much too fast is far more daunting than either can afford to pay at the moment.

So that’s how I like to view the two of them and their dynamic back during and because of those early years before Jason’s death. Bittersweet and shaded by nostalgia.....temptation and warning both, in how much they want to revisit it but how much they fear ruining what they’ve managed to cobble together now by bringing the past too much into the light, comparing past and present too clearly and risking that being reminded too strongly of the brothers they were back then, will just make it impossible to ever be content with anything but that bond replicated in full and they’re not sure it can be, are both too afraid too much has happened since then and trying too hard, putting too much pressure on the dynamic they’ve built now could risk shattering the relative fragile bond completely.

Pretty much everything I write with the two of them, unless I specifically state otherwise via context, is generally written through that lens, with me viewing that as the backstory for their dynamic that I’m running with.

[monaisme]

One Week Later - Chapter Two

This is the sequel to my one-shot, “The Battle”

He woke up in stages.

The first time he sort of came around, Peter didn’t even bother to open his eyes. In his sleep stupor, he noticed only the blanket. It smelled—which was weird ‘cuz Aunt May knew that scents bothered him, but this smell wasn’t offensive at all—it was fresh, real, maybe spicy? Its weight was off, too. It was heavier than his favourite Iron Man comforter, which was nice. The extra pressure made him feel safer than he could remember, though he didn’t understand why. He just knew he felt like he could sleep forever, and so he burrowed a little deeper into the warmth and drifted off.

The second time he thought about waking up, it was a quiet, underlying hum that drew his limited attention. It was like something, no—everything was vibrating, and not crazy like an engine... more like a cat’s purr and Peter imagined soft fur through his fingers as he pulled the blanket up to his chin. He hummed in contentment. It felt good. It felt relaxing. It lulled him back into sleep.

The third time Peter was aware of his surroundings he knew he had no choice but to stay awake. The blanket still pressed against him, and the hum of whatever still strummed through him—but hushed whispers of a man and woman nearby meant that people were there, that they waiting for him to come back...

And then he remembered.

His eyes flew open as he gasped which alerted whoever was in the room to his waking. Who that was, Peter wasn’t sure as he clamped his eyes shut in embarrassment. How could he have behaved so... gah! How would anyone ever take him seriously when he kept acting like a baby? –First on the battlefield and then before his surgery. If only he could just figure out some way to toss himself in front of a train, then maybe everyone would be distracted from what had happened.

Thoughts flew through his suddenly racing brain at a mile a minute and Peter tried to throw the blanket over his face to hide himself. He couldn’t face them... but then the pain of trying to move his still not healed arm caused him to gasp again and cry out in pain.  He’d hoped for invisibility but his reactions brought the hands of his visitors to him, straightened him on the bed.

The pain brought nausea and he was sure he was going to puke all over the nice smelling blanket and he couldn’t feel the hum anymore for the panic he was trying to tamp down and it hurt- it hurt- it hurt...

“You’re okay, Peter. Just breathe through it.” Mr. Stark was at his side, trying to settle him. “You’ve got this,” he encouraged as he ran his calloused fingers through Peter’s tangled locks. “Just keep breathing.”

It only took a minute for Peter’s breathing to regulate, which helped the pain, which helped the panic, which helped with the nausea—and Peter was left only just as tired as he’d been before he’d decided to spazz out like a weirdo, again.  He groaned and finally managed to pull his blanket over his head using his good arm. “Kill me now, please?” He whispered to himself as he flushed in utter humiliation.

Mr. Stark heard his pleas, however, and simply replied. “I just got you back, Petey. I’d much prefer it if you made an effort to keep breathing for me, bud.” Mr. Stark gave a light tug on the blanket and stayed beside him.

—Which was new?! Mr. Stark was supposed to say something snarky and then hightail it out of the room to call someone better suited to whatever occasion, be it a nurse or doctor or... well. It didn’t matter. The point was, he didn’t do all of that emotional stuff. The man had always insisted that he was stunted that way—which was maybe true, but it was alright, because he was just... Mr. Stark.

So Peter waited under the blanket and hoped that the room would clear, like it always had... even if Mr. Stark had been off-script, he’d leave, right? Peter just needed to wallow in private for a bit before he had to face—

“Peter?”

He closed his eyes and wondered if he could wait him out.

“Peter? Please?”

Mr. Stark would grow tired and leave eventually, right?

“Hey, kid, c’mon. Let me just see that you’re okay, okay? And if you want some time to yourself after that, I’ll go—I promise.”

Peter snort laughed. That sounded exactly like the old Mr. Stark. “Yeah, right,” he muttered.

Even under the blanket, Peter could hear the huff of frustration from his mentor, and then the scraping of chair legs against the floor as Mr. Stark seemed to station himself more comfortably at his side.

“You’ll find, my dear Mr. Parker, that many things have changed over the last five years... and one of those things is my ability to wait out all things stubborn—be it teammates, children, or alpacas. So if you think this is gonna put me off, you can think again, kiddo. I’ve got all the time in the world.”

Peter didn’t believe him.

He knew Mr. Stark. He knew him almost as well as his Aunt May—and was sure that Mr. Stark would start up a fuss soon enough—that this was all a bluff, but then he started to think too much and too fast... again.

Five years had passed. He had no reason to believe anyone was lying about the length of time he’d been in that place. Dr. Strange had said it before the battle, Mr. Stark had said it just then, and May wasn’t... well, May wasn’t here.

Maybe no one would judge him for his freak out?

And he needed answers and hiding under a blanket wasn’t going to get him anything.

But coming out of from under the blanket meant getting those answers, and the start of the now telltale tingling of his spider-senses told him that putting this off just a little longer might—or might not—be a bad thing.

Peter sighed as he warred with himself.

“Peter?”

His eyes filled and he fought back tears. “I’m okay, Mr. Stark. Promise. I, um...” his voice warbled. “I think I need a second, please.”

A gentle press of a hand against his good shoulder, still trapped under the blanket, “You can take all the time you need, as long as you’re okay. I’m right here when you’re ready.”

Peter blew out a slow breath and a few tears fell. “What happens if I don’t think I ever will be?”

The hand squeezed in support. “You will be, sweetheart. And when you are, I’m going to be right here.” Mr. Stark laughed that self-deprecating laugh that he always did. “And I’m not nearly the asshole I used to be so when you’re good, well, you know, I may even be helpful, but take your time. Honest. There’s no rush.” Another squeeze, and then Mr. Stark pulled his hand away.

A rush of urgency washed over the boy, and he knew that while Mr. Stark wasn’t lying to him, what he’d said wasn’t true.

He blew out another breath, this one of determination. Peter almost threw the blankets back—almost, but then thought better of it. Instead, he took a second to wipe away the wetness on his cheeks. Only once he’d done that, and was sure that no more tears would escape, did he ever so slowly pull the blanket down from his face. His cheeks were flushed and his eyes still shone with wetness, but he made himself look over at the man at his side. He cleared his throat and whispered, “Hi, Mr. Stark.”

He’d have thought Mr. Stark had just seen a pile of puppies for the soft look on his face. “Hey, Peter. Are you okay?”

Peter nodded a ‘yes.’

Mr. Stark nodded as well. “That’s good. Dr. Cho said your surgery went really well... and your blood work is almost back to normal. The guessing game starts now, though. Will your shoulder finish healing before your spider-powers come back completely or will your powers come back and then it heal your shoulder?” Mr. Stark chuckled. “Regardless, it’s almost over and I’m hoping that you never... ever have to go through that again.” He shuddered in remembrance. “It was awful to watch. I couldn’t imagine having to go through it.”

Peter shrugged with his one good arm. What could he say to that? “It’s okay.”

“No,” Mr. Stark replied. “It’s not. I didn’t even think that you coming back would have meant and we thrust you into the middle of a...” He stopped himself from speaking. Peter could see him visibly shift gears and then deflate. “No, we’re not talking about that yet. So much has happened, kiddo, and I don’t know where to start.”

Peter fiddled with the blanket underneath his hand nervously and voiced his biggest concern. “Can you tell me about May?”

Mr. Stark smiled down sadly at the boy. “I told you that we’d get you in front of a screen for a reunion once you were done with all the medical stuff, kiddo, and I wasn’t lying.” Mr. Stark gestured to the room at large. “I did manage to convince Dr. Cho that you would recover better in here, by the way, so you’ve managed to already hit the ‘temporary quarters’ portion of the event.”

Peter couldn’t help how unsure he sounded. “... and May?”

Mr. Stark looked at his watch. “New York is six hours behind us and it’s just after 1pm here, so that means that May is getting ready for an appointment just now...”

Mr. Stark knew Aunt May’s appointment schedule?

“... but I can give her the heads up that we’re waiting for her and maybe we can make some magic happen?” He smiled and gave Peter a wink. “But for now, why don’t we get you out of bed and get some real food in your stomach? I promised Dr. Cho that we’d stay on top of food and hydration if she took the IVs out, so...” Mr. Stark was trying to look nonchalant about the request, but he seemed concerned. “Does that work for you?”

Peter really wasn’t sure about the food idea, and he definitely wasn’t a fan of leaving his bed. It felt like sanctuary in what was about to be chaos and Peter couldn’t help but wish he could feel that way forever—but Mr. Stark seemed keen on seeing movement and Peter had already caused so much trouble—he nodded, “Okay. I can do that.”

Mr. Stark clapped his hands together and stood up. “Good man! Now—“ He started reaching toward the bed. “Let me help you out. You’ve been off your feet for far too long and, nutrients or not, I’m sure you’re gonna feel a little unsteady.” He pulled the blankets back and supported Peter as he swung his legs over the edge of the bed. “Okay. How are you feeling right now?”

If Peter were being honest, he’d have told Mr. Stark that he was feeling a little vertigo—that the room was tilting a little funny and that he wasn’t sure he was up for the task. And it wasn’t like he thought Mr. Stark would keep things from him, but delays because Peter couldn’t pull it together meant potentially waiting to hear word about May and he couldn’t risk it. “I’m good, sir. Thanks.” He gave a half smile, committed to the ruse and wiggled toward the end of the bed.

“You’re killing me, kid! I thought we were friends! You know that ‘sir’ garbage is absolutely unacceptable.“

Peter grinned at the familiarity. “C’mon,” he lowered himself to stand up on the floor, “You know I was raised to respect my elders.”

Mr. Stark rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah. Respect, my ass.” Mr. Stark cuffed Peter playfully across the back of his head. “The day I get any respect, is the day I sprout flowers out of my ass.”

A light tap on the door drew Peter’s attention as the words left Mr. Stark’s mouth, and then it opened enough for Ms. Potts head to peek into the room. “Now Tony, you know better than to use language like that in front of impressionable young children.” Ms. Potts playfully chastised him.

Mr. Stark rolled his eyes, “Sure he’s impressionable like I’m a—“

“Yes, Tony. I know, you’re the victim here and Peter was being a big meanie.” She looked at Peter and smiled affectionately before staring down the man beside him. “You know I wasn’t joking about the swear jar. Behave, Mr. Stark, or else.” She shook her head in mock disapproval and looked back at Peter. “I’m sorry to interrupt, I heard you two talking and was wondering if you wanted me to order something from the kitchen for lunch.”

Peter smiled awkwardly at her consideration and turned to Mr. Stark. “I’m not sure...” he started, only for Mr. Stark to interrupt.

“Yeah, Pep, that would be great.” Mr. Stark scrutinized Peter for a second, and saw enough that he turned back to Mr. Potts. “I don’t think his sandwich made it past Clint, so we’re gonna have to improvise. Can you see if they have a vegetable soup or broth—maybe some bread or crackers or something, too? I think we’ll keep it light for now... just until his metabolism is up to snuff again.” The request was made as he turned to Peter again. “Does that sound good?”

His stomach churned, and while it may not have sounded good, it was probably going to be at least manageable so he nodded ‘yes.’ “Thank you, Ms. Potts. That’s sounds great.” He smiled feebly.

The atmosphere in the room shifted, and Peter wondered why both adults seemed so uncomfortable.

“Actually, Pete,” Mr. Stark rededicated himself to getting Peter up from where he’d propped himself against the bed. “It’s Mrs. Stark now.” He chuckled nervously and cleared his throat. “It’s all official and everything. No take-backs.”  

Peter brought his attention over to Ms. Potts—um, Mrs. Stark, where she nervously wiggled the fingers of her left hand to show off a simple wedding band.

“Oh.” Peter frowned, then blushed, embarrassed again at his reaction. That had been unkind, and it wasn’t their fault. He tried to recover with what he hoped was his normal exuberance. “I mean—Oh! That’s awesome! Congratulations on your marriage, Mr. And Mrs. Stark.” He imagined the fanfare; imagined a large ballroom with dancing and food and laughter. He figured that May had gone. She and Ms. Potts—damn it! Mrs. Stark had been friends before—And his mentor? The man he thought of as his... crap. He stopped that train of thought and tried to shake off those five missed years. He huffed out a breath of regret. “I’m sorry I missed it...” He half smiled as his voice trailed off. That had made it no better. “I’m sorry,” he finally whispered.

Mr. Stark wrapped his arm around Peter’s waist and started moving them slowly toward the door Mrs. Stark was still standing at. “There’s nothing to be sorry for, Pete... at least for you. You’ve been in and out of it for the last week and we didn’t think it made sense to fill you in on all of the changes while you couldn’t really retain it. That’s on me, and I’m the one who should be sorry.”

Mrs. Stark moved out of their way and excused herself to get lunch for everyone, “That will give you boys a chance to talk,” she said quietly, and she left the suite for the kitchen.

Neither of them said anything as they shuffled toward the living room, which Peter appreciated. His emotions were all over the place in that moment, and physically, he knew he needed to sit down before he did something stupid like fall on his face.

“Peter? Are you doing alright?”

They were mere feet from the couch so Peter waited until he was sitting before he nodded. “Yeah,” he panted from the exertion. “I guess I’m just a little out of shape.” He joked. Peter took in the room around him with its glass and metal as he continued, “But sitting is good.” His head spun, but just a bit. “I guess I’ll take this over the being stuck in bed.”

Mr. Stark sat on the coffee table across from him and smiled. “That sounds like the Peter Parker I know.”  He leaned forward and put a strong hand on his knee. “Now, how do you want to work this? Do you want to ask questions, should I start at the beginning, or will this devolve into one of your trademarked Peter conversations where any semblance of order is thrown out the window so we should just jump right into it?”

Peter shrugged and simply answered, “I really want to know about Aunt May.”    

Mr. Stark exhaled slowly, then nodded. “Okay, so—May.” He pulled his hand back from the boy’s knee and clasped his hands together, almost like he was praying. “Alright. First and foremost, May is alive. She was not dusted so she’s still here. She knows you are back and has been updated regularly regarding your recovery... Oh! Thanks for the reminder! She says you’re grounded, by the way and,” Mr. Stark leaned forward and planted a big ol’ kiss on the top of Peter’s head. “That is from her, and she is so excited to hear from you now that you’re awake and coherent.”

Peter couldn’t hide his relief. “Okay. That’s so good. That means she’s okay, right? Is she just busy with work? I can’t even imagine how crazy the world must be...” Peter rambled before seeing that Tony wasn’t sharing in his exuberance. “Mr. Stark?”  

Mr. Stark jumped into it with an explanation, “Before I start, kid, please know that most of the story is what I’ve been told. I was stuck floating on a spaceship for three weeks and only found out about this after we came back, so I may not be able to answer your questions... but if I can’t, we’ll find someone who can. Okay? Maybe Pepper? Heck. Maybe we should wait for Pepper? She shouldn’t be too much longer and then—“

“Is it that bad?” Peter asked.

Mr. Stark closed his eyes, like he was steeling himself up to do something awful, and that’s when Peter knew. He closed his own eyes for a second, tried to temper the emotions warring within him. He needed to be strong.

“After the first snap, she couldn’t find you—or Ned, or anyone, I guess, so she called Pepper who didn’t know what the hell was going on either. Steve... uh, Steve Rogers,” Mr. Stark added, in case Peter needed clarification, “He got in touch with Pepper and brought her over to Wakanda to rally the remaining troops, I guess, but—yeah. May was invited to come, too, but with all of the chaos after that snap, May decided to stay and keep working. The ratio of healthcare workers to the injured was horrifying, Pete, but your aunt was a freakin’ hero. She worked harder than anyone and saved so many lives over the course of the week after...”

“And?” Peter was growing impatient.

Mr. Stark hesitated.

“Mr. Stark, please.”

Mr. Stark leaned forward again, “She’d worked another overtime shift and was leaving the emergency department sometime around 2am. From what the police could gather, a drug addict was heading into the hospital hoping to get a fix when he saw your aunt in her uniform and approached her instead.” Mr. Stark tried to catch Peter’s eye, but Peter refused. “She tried to talk him into going in and getting help but this guy’s dealer and his back up had both been dusted and he was next level desperate and, um...” Mr. Stark’s mouth twisted as he tried to say the words. “She was stabbed in the side eight times, and would have bled out in minutes if not for the fact that she was only steps away from the ER doors. She was rushed into surgery, where the doctors were able to save her, but she ended up losing a kidney.”  

Peter blanched. “She was stabbed?” He squeaked.

Mr. Stark held his hands again, “Yeah, bud.” He ran his thumbs gently over Peter’s knuckles. “Do you need to take a break? I’m not expecting that we’ll be able to talk to her for a bit, so there’s time.”

It was like the universe was listening as a disembodied voice interrupted them and announced, “Incoming video call from May Parker’s primary physician.”

Peter dropped his head into his hands waiting to see what cruel joke it had in store for him.

Mr. Stark didn’t hesitate to reply. “Answer it, FRIDAY.” He stood up and moved to shield Peter from the camera. “Dr. Bonwick, we didn’t have a call scheduled for today. Is everything alright?”

Peter couldn’t see him, but could hear the concern in his voice, “No, we didn’t, but Mrs. Parker has developed an infection at her access site and we’ve had to move her back into the med bay for further treatment. She had mentioned a video call to her nephew,” Mr. Stark shifted again, “and had seemed quite agitated about missing it, but with the fever, she’s struggling with pain levels and we’ve had to adjust med dosages temporarily.”

Mr. Stark placed a hand on Peter’s shoulder. “So no phone call today,” Mr. Stark stated.

“No, Sir. We had to bump her dialysis treatment up to very early this morning in order to accommodate the antibiotics schedule, so she’s currently sleeping.  We anticipate that she’ll stay that way until we can get the right dosage working for her.”

Mr. Stark sighed. “Alright. Please let me know when she’s awake, Doc.” Mr. Stark’s hand moved and he ran his fingers through the curls at the nape of his neck. “She wasn’t the only one excited about that call. FRIDAY, disconnect.”

Neither of them moved, but Peter spoke first. “Tell me.”

Mr. Stark dropped to the seat beside him, but kept his fingers moving through Peter’s hair. “When they removed her kidney, it was obvious that it wasn’t healthy, so they did every test under the sun. It turns out that May has a genetic condition called autosomal dominant polycystic dominant kidney disease—and you’re lucky that I got it right that time, ‘cause I’m never saying it again.” Mr. Stark shifted to wrap his arm around Peter’s torso and hugged him to his side. “Some people can have it and never know, while others get sick, suffer chronic headaches, develop cysts, high blood pressure... there’s a list somewhere.” Mr. Stark stopped for a second, regrouped, and then continued. “Regardless, your Aunt May didn’t know she had it, didn’t even know it was something in her family, what with—“

“Them all being dead?” Peter finished his sentence for him.

Mr. Stark side hugged him again. “Yeah, that.”

Peter shook his head. “I don’t know what to say—like, what kind of treatment is she receiving? Where is she? Is she gonna be okay? Can I go see her?”

“Breathe, Peter.” Mr. Stark reminded him. “Of course you can see her. We were waiting for you to be better before leaving, just in case things went all topsy-turvy, but you seem to be in the final-final stretch so Pep and I were thinking that we’d head back to New York tomorrow.”

Peter nodded eagerly, ignoring the lingering dizziness.

“We’ll head straight to the tower then, okay? May’s been there since she was released from the hospital five years ago. She’d wanted to keep working, but I figured you’d want me to keep an eye on her, especially after... so we compromised and she moved into Nat’s old quarters. When she started getting sicker, we moved her into the penthouse and brought in a team to treat her specifically. She’s in the med bay right—“

“Wait! Sicker?” Peter interrupted. “It’s just an infection, right? That’s what the doctor said!”

“Peter, your aunt’s condition worsened in the years after the stabbing,” Mr. Stark moved again to sit back on the coffee table—took his hands in his again. “Peter, I need you to understand. With only one compromised kidney, it wasn’t long before your aunt was on dialysis and the organ transplant list, but with half the population gone...”

“No.”

“Peter. Look at me.” The stern tone brought Peter’s eyes up. “We have done everything humanly possible to take care of your aunt, I promise you that—and now that everyone is back, there may be a chance...?”

The laugh that came out of Peter bordered on hysterical as the reality he’d reformed into came crashing down around him before he’d even taken a breath. “Stop. I can’t hear it.” He looked wildly around the room, “I just need to process this and then figure things out and then I’ll be good.” He stood up, forcing Mr. Stark to lean back on the table. “I need to talk to May.”

“Peter, she’s—“

“I know, okay!?. I know! I heard him!” He was trying not to panic but it vibrated through him like that earlier hum. He wished he could go back to however long ago and that peace and safety but he’d already wasted so much time recovering and five years in that damned stone! How could he--? May had needed him and he was gone and she was hurt and sick and he was gone and now he was here and he was still too far away! Why couldn’t he ever be in the right place at the right time? First Ben and now—Damn it! “I need to—I need to take a walk,” Peter stepped away from the couch, unsteady, but determined to pace. “I’m gonna take a walk and then I’m gonna sit down and make a list—“ Aunt May always said to make a list if he felt too overwhelmed, and if ever there was a time—Peter’s heart started to race as he gulped in air. “I’ll do that and then I’ll have a plan—and then when I talk to Aunt May, I won’t need to worry her—“ He swayed. “I can’t worry her, Mr. Stark.” Peter could feel his heart breaking. He crouched low and curled in on himself. “I can’t do this again.”

Peter felt him come up beside him and usher him back to the couch. “C’mon, sweetheart. I hear you, but we need to get you lying down before you pass out.” He pressed him down onto the couch and manoeuvred Peter back so he was stretched out. Some throw cushions somehow made it under his feet and Mr. Stark was again sitting on that stupid coffee table at Peter’s head. “You’re okay, kiddo. Just breathe for me.”

Peter turned away from his mentor and pressed his face into the back of the couch. “No.” He brought his arms up over his head, not even noticing that the pain in his shoulder was almost gone for the pain in his chest. “I can’t.”

Mr. Stark moved from the coffee table to the narrow strip of cushion behind him. “Yes, you can, Peter. You do it all the time.”

“But what if I don’t want to...” He sounded so pathetic even as he gasped.

“Well, if you don’t want to do it for you, then you do it for someone else—like your aunt... just until you get the strength back to do it for yourself.”

“But when she’s gone...”    

“Then you do it for someone else, Peter Parker.” Mr. Stark shifted a bit, then came in for a hug from behind. “Because if you think, for one damned second, that you’re alone, you are wrong—do you understand me?”

A gut wrenching sob tore from Peter’s throat and he couldn’t—he just couldn’t. He shook his head to disagree, but the warm pressure of his mentor at his back, staying beside him as he struggled, told him that he was wrong. It was too much to bear and Mr. Stark was there and he needed something—someone to anchor him before he lost himself completely. He forced himself to move right then, because if he didn’t, he never would again. He sat up, awkward and gangly as he fought against cushions and emotional exhaustion. Mr. Stark was there, waiting to see what Peter needed, and so Peter threw himself into his arms and wept as Mr. Stark’s arms came around him. “I wanna go home, Mr. Stark. Please. I just wanna go home.”

Mr. Stark rocked him, “Alright, buddy. We’ll get you there,” he promised. “We’ll get you home to May.“

* * * * * *

Mrs. Stark found them that way only a short time later, and Peter was drained enough that he couldn’t bring himself to care.

“Tony?” She whispered as she gently placed a tray laden with food on the coffee table. “Has something happened?”

Mr. Stark continued rocking as he answered. “May’s doctor called. We had to postpone the video call and we talked about May—all of it.”

And that was enough for Mrs. Stark to understand. “Okay. So what’s the plan, honey?”

“When Peter’s ready for me to move, I’ll get in touch with T’Challa and Dr. Strange and arrange for a portal back home.” Peter snuggled deeper into Mr. Stark’s chest and the man pressed a kiss into Peter’s hair. “Not yet, baby, I know.” He shifted to accommodate Peter’s wiggles and continued. “Other than that—“ Mr. Stark shrugged. “I guess we figure out how to move forward from all of this?”

And Peter wondered to himself if he ever would.

[movieguy50]

Hey everyone,

I just want to give everyone a quick update as to what's going on with the scams or what's called operation drain and run out of the 200 that were arrested the other day most have been released must have been very forthcoming and giving information some of them have been detained further pending for their interview and or their charges are going to be dropped or reduced law enforcement agencies have confirmed that there are some more smaller cell operations of this type going on here in the United States and in Canada they are now getting in with the Canadian authorities to help with the investigation up there I can't tell you that 75 of the 200 people arrested the other day were members of Tumblr so basically yes they were right under our nose and we did not know it but I knew it.

I can also tell you that information from this point forward is going to be very slim because they are wanting to Big Cheese the people that are actually masterminding all this and they're going to have to start being careful what information they let out and that's totally acceptable to me I totally understand that and they did say the other thing about passing the info. on to you guys as much as they can. They said that I have been a big help in this there's been a few other people that have come forward they've also been assisting and helping out but I still need some more help so anything y'all got if it if it means you got scammed don't worry about being embarrassed you're not going to be judged or you're not going to be treated like shit just because you fell for it.

So now if you've noticed that I changed the format of my blog it makes it look like it's in a daily or weekly episodic TV show it's still called a slice of my world but it's also episode 1-18 this is starting to become a daily or actually it should say it bi-weekly thing of me posting and I have enjoyed it don't get me wrong but the title of this is called oh how things have changed and it's basically going to be a lot of difficult reading from this point forward but stuff that once you read it you'll understand why it has been so difficult I I'm going to Chronicle the night of January 20th of last year through the morning hours of January 21st which is what I considered the moment my life changed forever.

So we begin on January 20th 2020 I had to go to work I walked 4 miles to go to work because I didn't have a vehicle anymore and we were living in a motel so I had to you know make sure one of us is working until a lot of times where I was staying even hard for me to get a ride. So I work the 3:30 to close shift which basically meant I left between anywhere from between 12:30 and 1:00 in the morning I worked at a movie theater which by the way was probably the best job I had ever had in my life I I love that place I would love to go back to another one like it. So basically I got off work about 12:30 that night and normally I would have a ride to work on Monday nights this week it wasn't possible because of something that happened at the theater the manager got behind on his paperwork on and couldn't get out on time like he normally does I had to go to the store that night because we didn't have very much food so I went to store I got about 2 or 3 nights worth of food with enough till I get to my day off from work to go to the store and get more. That was a common occurrence so by the time I got done with the store and got home about 2:30 in the morning my wife was asleep she had been sick for about a month before this which now I have directly linked into being one of the first cases of COVID-19 in the united states'.

I came home and like I said she was asleep and I gave her a kiss like I usually do sometimes it wakes her up sometimes it doesn't this time it woke her up we start talking for a little bit I went outside and I did my usual ritual I go outside and smoke a little weed you know kind of relaxed a little bit for about 20-30 minutes yeah I went inside and cooked dinner now for a little background my wife had been sick for a while she had a heart attack November 8th in 2018 and then she had a stroke Easter Sunday of 2019 a stroke that she refused to go get taken care of even though I begged her and had other people beg her to go to the hospital she would not do it when she had the heart attack the doctor was not able to fix all the blockages to her heart because some of the arteries were too small so he told me privately that if she had another heart attack she wouldn't survive it I knew that I told her that about 3 months later so she knew but on this night I never had any dream or knowing that 2 hours after I got home from work she would be dead she had a massive heart attack I was just getting ready to start cooking dinner when she started really screaming about chest pain and I've never heard her go off like she did and even though I called 911 it still took the damn people 20 minutes to get out there otherwise I still think she'd be alive but then again maybe not so to try to make a long story short they would not let me ride in the ambulance with her to the hospital she was still coherent but when they did the ekg in the room where we were staying at I could tell the guy's eyes that she wasn't going to be much longer and I think the reason why they told me I couldn't ride with them was because for the same Theory I think that they didn't want my last memory of her to be of her fighting for her life and dying and I am thankful for that because I've had horrible nightmares about this whole thing and so after I made all the notifications and everything that day I went back to work two days later and I was told I could stay out as long as I needed to they were really really super awesome and amazing to me hell they were even responsible for giving me the money to get my wife buried because they donated money they put a pool in together to help me. The thing about it was is I don't know what upset me more the fact that I wish there was something more I could have done or the fact that I had to have a fucking cop show up to my door to tell me that she was gone even though I had already known it. So when I went back to work two days later it was very very hard because she used to work there too and she used to work at the podium on the weekends where she took the tickets and everything and told people where the theaters were and everything else and I wasn't there for 2 hours and I just doubled over it was just like a big flood of emotion but I made it that night but the hard part was with the weekends because those were the nights that she worked the most everybody loved my wife it worked up there and so I mean I didn't feel like I was so alone then the pandemic came I lost my job I lost my place where I was staying I had to go to my sister-in-law's house which was the biggest mistake of my life cuz I really found out what kind of people they were plus that's when I developed a curiosity for methamphetamine and then I met the bitch from hell not even 2 months later and keep in mind she was just supposed to be a companion we weren't like going to be boyfriend girlfriend cuz I still way too broke up about my wife's death that's all I wanted cuz I couldn't stand being lonely anymore just like I can't stand it now but she got me hooked on meth and I say she got me hooked because she kept bringing it around me knowing that I found something new that I really liked and I didn't ask her to bring it around I could have said no but this has to do with that 28 day period from June to July where she was drugging me putting the dope in my food in my drinks that's why I blame her.

Then after my ex got murdered at a house party I lost my sister-in-law and nephew and then my step daughter called me one day two weeks before Christmas to tell me that she lost her fiance her baby's daddy after he had a heart attack from A congenital heart defect that he had for 6 years the only bright spot of 2020 was my step daughter had a daughter of her own and that to this day that baby is my love bug

As where I'm at right now I'm going to be homeless by next weekend again unless I can come up with $250-300 dollars by Friday night it doesn't look like it's going to happen folks unless I can get some donations and get them quick I am taking donations right now if you can help I don't care if it's 5 10 15 20 $25 whatever it is it will help I don't expect nobody to give me the money all at once cuz I know a lot of people don't have that kind of money right now so just little donations will help right now I had to actually go to Walmart today and steal food God I hate myself for doing it I didn't get caught but still my conscience was getting the best of me for much of the evening I got enough food here to last me for 2 or 3 days if I end up getting to stay here but like I said it's not looking very good at this point I've tried local resources I've tried all kinds of Charities help and all they want you to do is hurry up and wait and I ain't got that kind of time and I told him that so I I'm asking for any help that anyone could give if I don't get if I can get at least $250 out of 400 I can go get me a motel room for the week and I'll get me by until I can come back here when my roommate comes back cuz then he'll have the money for the rent and everything else so I can come back here so I just need to really get by for a week I have not had any dope in nine days I'm going crazy but I need a place to live first before I can be doing that shit so I'll just have to deal with it if you want to help I'll give you my cash app I will put it at the end of this post for everybody so the last 18 months has not been fun I went to six suicide of Temps and I just been existing when before I had it all anyway so that's basically going to end this episode of a slice of my world I'm sorry if this was such a downer for a lot of people but you know I the more and more I feel like I tell my story easier everyday gets for me cuz I don't feel like I'm burying myself with all the emotion and having to keep it bottled up anyway I will talk to you y'all whenever I talk to you I may be on Hiatus for a little bit because I won't have a phone here after tomorrow unless I go someplace that has Wi-Fi and depending on my living situation I mean like I said I'm I'm hoping and praying somebody will be able to help out by donating a little bit of money to me so I can keep a place over my head somehow someway anyway y'all. I love you take care of yourself and I'll see you on the other side

Cashtag $jojo091069

PayPal

Venmo

Google pay

Message for those tags I left blank as I don't know them by heart yet

Love,. Sean

[whump-tr0pes]

Honor bound - 50

This is a series. Start here. Continued from here. 

AO3

Cw: mention of past torture, PTSD

Vera wrapped her arms around her knees, shivering slightly in the cool air. Dusk was settling in the sky, the sunset fading gently to tones of blue and grey.

It was peaceful here. The trees, the wind, the sky, they all made Vera feel calm. Like she was home, for the first time. Had she ever felt so safe? She didn’t feel that pull to go, to move, to flee before someone could find her. She didn’t feel the need to escape.

It wasn’t just the house that made her feel that way. It wasn’t just the woods.

She stirred as she heard the door behind her open and close. As slow footsteps approached she sat up, looking over her shoulder to greet whoever was coming.

Isaac smiled at her and motioned to the step where she was sitting. “Mind if I join?” She nodded and moved over to make room for him. He breathed deep, relishing the cool night air. “Nice night.”

She nodded, closing her eyes. “I’ve been coming out here a lot. It’s nice and quiet.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to -”

“It’s fine.” She opened her eyes and smiled at him, bumping his shoulder with hers. “I’m glad you’re here.”

He looked at his hands, folded together in front of him. The brace was off.

Vera’s eyebrows went up. “All the way better, huh?”

Isaac smiled unconsciously. “Sure. Physically.”

Vera snorted. “About time. I hear the mental stuff takes years.” Her smile slid off her face. “I’m…um…I’m sorry…”

Isaac nudged her back. “Don’t be.”

“No, I…I shouldn’t be such an asshole…”

“You’re not an asshole.” She met his eyes, a pleading apology passing over her face before clumsy sadness replaced it. He put an arm around her shoulder and squeezed. “You’re not. Honestly with what you’ve gone through, I’m surprised you’re not a total headcase.”

She laughed once, bitterly. “How do you know I’m not?”

“Cuz I’ve known you for four years, dumbass.” He gave her a playful shove.

She pushed herself upright, her lips quirking up into a smile. “Careful, Isaac. You just got fixed up. It would be a shame to kick your ass all over again.”

“You of all people could do it, I guess.”

“Damn right I could.”

They laughed quietly together and fell silent again. They watched the sky darken.

“How do you get over the mental stuff?” Isaac’s voice was almost a whisper. Vera squeezed her eyes shut. “I’m sorry. I just…” He hung his head. Vera watched him as he pressed his hands against his face. “It’s been months. Almost three. Everyone’s all healed up but I’m…” He ran his hands through his hair. “I still have nightmares almost every night. I still hurt sometimes. Even when…even when nothing is happening. Sometimes I feel like he’s coming after me and I’m going to die. My heart won’t stop beating fast and I feel like I’ll pass out…” He squeezed his hand into a fist. “It shouldn’t be this fucking hard. Not for me. Sam’s never been through anything like that but I…” He shook his head. “I’ve been hurt before. I’ve killed before. It shouldn’t…” He blew out a slow breath.

“There is no ‘should’, Isaac.” Vera’s voice was low and strained. “I was a fucking cop. I trained in resisting interrogation, I worked the streets for three years. I saw all kinds of shit. I was punched, shot at, had people pull knives and guns on me all the time. And when that lunatic took me I still fucking broke. I broke hard, harder than you. I broke just like everyone else did, just like Sam, Ellis, Finn…” She squeezed his arm. “People break when other people break them. It doesn’t say a damn thing about who you are.” She swallowed hard. “Take it from somebody who knows, Isaac.” He raised his head to meet her gaze. “You are fucking strong. You’re the bravest man I know. And…what Gavin did to you would have broken anyone. It would have broken me.” She held his gaze until he looked down. “Fuck, Gavin broke me after one slap. If that doesn’t -”

“That doesn’t count.” Isaac’s voice was hard. “You were -”

“Already broken?” Vera looked at him evenly.

“No. That’s not what I meant.”

“I know what you meant, Isaac.” She leaned against him. “I don’t know how to get better. I don’t. If I did, I’d be better now. It’s not something you just…get over. It’s something you carry with you, and that’s ok.” He met her eyes, gaze helpless. “It’s going to be part of you. You’re going to have nightmares. You’re going to have flashbacks. But they’ll get less and less. And when you have them…” She licked her lips. “We’ll be there for you. We’ll help you.” He looked away. “I know it’s hard. Believe me, I know. Ok? But you can talk to me.”

He swallowed hard. “I know I can,” he whispered. “I know I can trust you.” When he looked up again he had tears in his eyes. “You know you can trust me too, right?”

Vera let out a shaky breath. “I…I know I can. It just…hurts. I didn’t want anyone to know.”

Isaac laughed, the sound coming out a little twisted. “Yeah. I understand that one. I didn’t talk to Sam for weeks because I didn’t want them to know about something they watched happen…” He buried his face in his hands. “When they went through the same thing. Why can’t I just…”

Vera smiled painfully. “Because you’re a dumbass. Just like me. We’re a family of fucking dumbasses.”

He laughed, happier this time. “Yup. That’s us.” His shoulders relaxed a little. “I just…I know we’re leaving soon. And I’m so scared I won’t be able to protect them. Not when I’m like this.”

Vera swallowed hard and looked away. Isaac watched the movement carefully. “You don’t want to leave.” It wasn’t a question.

Her jaw flexed. “I’m…” She licked her lips.

He smiled. “You and Tori, huh?”

Her mouth fell open. “What…how…”

He laughed. “Gray told me. Who heard from Finn. Who heard from Ellis.”

She turned and looked back towards the house, moving like she was about to get up. “God dammit, Ellis, you asshole…”

“Hey.” She turned her gaze back him, embarrassed fury coiled in her eyes. “You don’t have to be embarrassed about it.”

“I’m not fucking embarrassed, they just need to mind their own damned business…”

“Vera.” His hand was gentle on her shoulder. “You don’t have to hide this from us, either. You don’t have to hide at all.”

She trembled with tension. Tears brimmed in her eyes as she looked at Isaac. He kept his hand on her shoulder, an anchor against her urge to leave. She drew in a breath, held it, let it out.

“You don’t have to hide who you are, Vera. What you’ve been through…what hurts you…the people you love…” His eyes were soft. “We won’t use them against you. No one will.”

“You don’t know that.” She willed herself to be calm as the instinct to push him away rose.

He paused. “That’s true. We can’t stop bad things from happening. But we…” His hand tightened on her arm. “…I love you. I want to be there for you. No matter what it is, good or bad.” He held her gaze. “I couldn’t protect you from your past, or from Gavin. Let me be here for you for something good.”

Her throat was tight and her eyes burned. She dragged in a deep inhale, closing her eyes and willing herself to be calm. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I’m just…used to hiding it. All of it.”

“I know.” He pulled his hand away. “You’re good at it. None of us had any idea what had been done to you. Tori, though…” His lips pulled up into a smile. “Apparently you weren’t so good at hiding that.” He winked at her.

She couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled from her throat, tight with tension and unsteady. Isaac laughed with her. “Yeah, Ellis caught us mackin’ it in the kitchen. Not the most private spot.”

Isaac leaned against her. “I’m happy you found her. I’m happy you found someone.”

Vera’s face fell. “But we’re leaving soon.”

Isaac was silent for a moment. “Yeah.”

Vera shut her eyes against the burn of tears. “I’m probably never going to see her again.”

He shook his head. “I think you will.”

She looked at him. “How?”

Isaac tilted his head. “Gray has been talking to her a lot about next steps recently. We knew we couldn’t stay here forever. But now that we know Tori helps the resistance movements and runs a safehouse specifically for syndicate victims…” He shrugged. “They’ve been considering a lot of things, but I think the biggest thing is a joint endeavor. Depending on who else would be for it we’d continue to do raids and run interference, but with a bigger plan. We’d directly funnel people to Tori for recuperation, and then she’d send them out to other safehouses farther away from the syndicates, or out of the country entirely.”

Vera shook her head. “Where else is safer? I haven’t heard of anywhere else doing better than here.”

Isaac shrugged. “There are a lot of rumors, but there are definitely places safer than this. The syndicates tend to clump in one place. There are regions to the north where there are huge swaths of land they hardly control at all. Tori thinks she could establish a pretty solid relationship with some people out there to take people on the run and distribute them away from the syndicates. It would give us purpose, and help a lot of people.” He nudged her. “And have the added bonus of lots of time with your girlfriend between missions.”

She blushed. “She’s not my girlfriend.”

Isaac smiled. “Well sorry about that, ‘soulmate’ seemed kinda intense.”

She pushed him, a little harder than she meant to. Her cheeks blazed. “Oh my god, Isaac.”

He laughed. “What? You guys seem…good together. Really good. She’s good for you.”

“She’s too good for me.” She looked down, cheeks still warm.

“Yeah, probably.” She glanced at him and he was grinning at her.

She smacked his arm gently. “You’re an asshole.”

“Yeah, but I’m your asshole.” He laughed. “Wait. That came out wrong.”

She rolled her eyes. “Christ. I don’t know how I deal with you.”

“Frankly, neither do I. But you love me.” He flashed her his biggest smile.

She sighed. “Yeah, I do. Idiot.” She ducked her head. “Thanks for telling me the plan. I’m grateful for it. Tori is…” She shook her head. “I…I want to see her. I want to be around her after this. I’ll have to thank Gray for the idea.”

“Don’t thank Gray.” She looked up at him. “Thank Tori. It was her idea.” Her eyes widened as his smile got soft. “Sounds like she’d do anything to be around you, too.”

Continued here

@untilthepainstarts​​, @womping-grounds​​, @blue-flare10​​, @free-2bmee​​, @quirkykayleetam​​, @walkingchemicalfire​​, @inpainandsuffering​​, @redwingedwhump​​, @burtlederp​​, @castielamigos-whump-side-blog​​, @insomniacscoprio​​, @whumpy101, @whumpywhumper

[pendulum-sonata]

Classicalship!

Why am I not surprised :P, anyway this is gonnna be super long, so it will have to be under read more:

General:

Rate the Ship -  Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs

How long will they last? - They would last forever cuz they’re both long-commited people

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - Not quickly, and even if it was, they would take too long to figure out like the two oblivious blockheads they are… maybe Yuzu wouldn’t take too long realizing, but would be a bit intimidated if she isn’t sure of his feelings.

How was their first kiss? - I kinda waddle between a surprise peck from Yuzu to Reiji and in between a rougher kiss when the sexual tension is a bit too much to handle :P

Wedding:

Who proposed? - Reiji most likely, but if we’re honest Yuzu had probably figured out that he would ask her but didn’t want to pressure him because she knows feelings are hard for him.

Who is the best man/men? - Yuya would likely be Reiji’s best man, and maybe after much begging proding Sawatari would sneak his way into it to everyone’s dismay.

Who is the braid’s maid(s)? - Yuzu would probably had an entire group made of it, just to the top of my head: Yoko, Masumi, Serena, Ayu (although she could be the flower girl too), Asuka, Reira, maybe even Himika lol.

Who did the most planning? - Neither, Himika took over quickly and wanted to argue about it either, because no one would win this conversation against her :’D

Who stressed the most? - I have a feeling Reiji would have a slowly rising stress at the thought of everything and how big it feels, Yuzu wouldn’t get stressed in the emotional part but she would get stressed by all the things Himika plans to put on the wedding and basically turning it into a public event (which she already had second thought about.)

How fancy was the ceremony? -Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big. (Unwillingly lol, I kinda imagine them as the type of people who would compromise to the big ceremony Himika wants, but the party would be far more private, only friends and family)

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - Leo, even if he was invited, I have a feeling he wouldn’t want to come lol.

Sex:

Who is on top? - I think they switch depending on the mood.

Who is the one to instigate things? - Yuzu, hands down, like after the awkwardness of the first time, I feel she would defitely do it.

How healthy is their sex life? -Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now

How kinky are they? -Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head

How long do they normally last? - I don’t know? I mean it probably varies, but they probably aren’t the type of having ‘quickies’ so I’d say from normal lenght to more? >.>

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - I imagine Reiji is a little too obssesed with ‘performing well’  so he probably does worry about this, but I don’t think Yuzu keeps track

How rough are they in bed? -Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it. (lol, Yuzu probably tried to get Reiji to be rough once and he ended up feeling bad about it xD)

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? -No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? - Not gonna lie, I think they would have 2 at most

How many children will they adopt? - I mean, they’re already the mom and dad of the team, so I think they technically have plenty of adopted people around. 

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - Neither, I think Nakajima gets to be a nanny and bodyguard

Who is the stricter parent? - People on the outside would think it’s Reiji, but it’s actually Yuzu, not that she would get to be a control freak, but let’s face it: Reiji was probably a pretty free range child and would think it’s okay then Yuzu would get like “You can’t be serious.” face.

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - Yuzu most likely, but Reiji could be like in a situation where he forbids something and the kids go like “but weren’t you already doing far more dangerous stuff than me at that age?” and he would get stuck, Yuzu would unflinchinly say something on the lines of “I did a lot of things at your age that won’t be doing.” 

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - They live in a paradox where they remeber to pack their kids lunches but forget their own.

Who is the more loved parent? - they’re both loved, but the kids probably know it’s easier to manipulate Reiji into agreeing to things Yuzu never would. (you can’t convince me Reiji wouldn’t be weak for his children.)

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? Both take turns, but I can imagine Yuzu is more likely to get into a incident related to her temper and get banned from attending :P

Who cried the most at graduation? - Yuzu in public, both in private,

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - Reiji, but for once not because of his permissive tendencies, but because now they managed to piss their dad and it’s gonna be him the one to discipline them, and they’ll remember to never push him too far again.

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? - I can’t see either cooking much, Reiji is probably clueless and Yuzu may know basic stuff like rice balls or pancakes but that’s it, this is probably another things that falls under Nakajima’s tasks :P

Who is the most picky in their food choice? - Reiji, for virtue of having most likely grown with personal cooks or chefs

Who does the grocery shopping? - Surprisingly Reiji, because Yuzu still can’t shake the habit of buying during sales and on a budget and Reiji doesn’t like to be stingy with food.

How often do they bake desserts? - Not too often, because Reiji doesn’t have much of a sweet tooth and Yuzu may have some every once on a while but she prefers fruity flavors than sweets.

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - Man, I feel that since Yuzu is more active than Reiji (pro duelist) she would go for meat and more protein diet, whereas Reiji is a salad guy.

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - Reiji would take Yuzu to expensive places to eat.

Who is more likely to suggest going out? - Yuzu is a social butterfly, so she would like to be out more often and avoid Reiji of becoming a full-blown recluse

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking? - I would say Reiji if I would believe he wouldn’t follow recipes to the T, maybe he would end up screwing up something but not to that level, Yuzu would probably do it for confusion over the fancy kitchen and what button does what.

Chores:

Who cleans the room? - I think Reiji would be the type to want things tidy and ordered, so he does most of the time without really thinking about it.

Who is really against chores? - Neither, but they have specific chores they do and some don’t even cross their mind it needs to be done: Reiji? Likes things clean and ordered, but ask him if he knows how to do laundry. Yuzu? Very good at keeping thing “clean” but it’s she’s probably the type to have an organized mess.

Who cleans up after the pets? - I don’t think they would have pets.

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - Yuzu lol

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - Both do but for different reasons, Reiji for planning but he hides it well and Yuzu because she has to remember etiquette and all.

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - Pfft no one, because Reiji doesn’t handle cash, maybe they’d be more prone to find cards 

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - Both do lol, I imagine Reiji is very thorough with cleaning himself, while Yuzu just likes to relax.

Who takes the dog out for a walk? - Again, they woulnd’t have pets so… next.

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - Yuzu definitely does and Reiji indulges her even if he has to bear with wearing an ugly xmas sweater,

What are their goals for the relationship? - I don’t see Yuzu as doing long-term goals (she’s more on the impulsive side) but Reiji probably sees themselves growing old together

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - Yuzu on her off days.

Who plays the most pranks? - Yuzu may do it… I think? But nah.

[blazinbeautywrites]

But You’re Not Mine

Note: Due to the rampant uprising of plagiarism on this site and others I am stating once and once only that this is my ORIGINAL work. If I find out that you have stolen/taken any part of my work I will handle you and the situation the way I see fit.

None of the pics of gifs I use belong to me so full credit goes to the originators of said gifs and pics.

Length: 1,667 words

Genre: Slight smut/Angst

They both knew it was wrong but here they were hot, sweaty messes tangled up in the sheets of a high class hotel. Yugyeom knew that going after his bandmate’s girl was fucked up but he didn’t give a fuck.

“I bet JB doesn’t fuck you like this.”Yugyeom grunted as he thrusted in and out of Zanai at an inhumane pace.

“God no...OH MY GOD!” Zanai yelled as she reached an earth shattering orgasm. Slick with sweat, Yugyeom finally exploded and as his body shook at the release of his own orgasm. Zanai moaned at the aftershocks of her own. She closed her legs at an attempt to dull the aching between her legs but to no avail.

“That was amazing. I love your pussy so fucking much.” Yugyeom breathed out as he turned to face her. Zanai gave him a weak smile then got out of bed in search of her clothes.

“You always say that.” She let out a small laugh. The guilt never failed to hit her after an amazing rendezvous with Yugyeom. She thought back to the first time she met the group when JYP flew her to South Korea to choreograph JUS2’s comeback. After a few months she and JB started dating yet she always felt drawn to Yugyeom. She was helping him perfect a move one night when he kissed her. 

“Hey, you okay?” Yugyeom asked, snapping her out of her thoughts.

“Yeah just thinking about the first time I met you. JB and the guys.” Zanai said.

“Why are you thinking about that?” Yugyeom asked.

“Cuz I feel like shit Yugyeom! I’ve been cheating on my boyfriend for the past year with his bandmate. This is so wrong yet I keep coming back to you. You’re like a fucking drug I don’t know how to quit.” Zanai yelled. She quickly put on her clothes and moved to grab her phone when Yugyeom stopped her.

“Please don’t go. I love you.” Yugyeom pleaded.

“I’m sorry. I need some space. Please don’t call or text me.” Zanai said. With that she left him a mess in the dirty sheets to wallow in his own hurt and anger.

“Well if that’s the game you’re gonna play.” Yugyeom muttered under his breath. He pulled out his phone and sent a few pics and screenshots of texts to a place he’d never thought he’d contact: Dispatch.

******************

When Zanai arrived to her apartment she saw JB’s car and dreaded seeing him, especially in her current state. She did her best to look like she didn’t just get the common sense fucked out of her and walked into her building and up to her floor. Upon opening the door she saw JB sitting on the sofa and her heart immediately dropped at the sight of his bright smile.

“Hey baby. How was work? Are you okay?”JB asked as he surveyed her. He got worried she’d overworked herself.

“I’m fine, just a bit tired and a little hungry.” Zanai replied.

“I ordered some Indian food for us. Practice ended early since Yugyeom decided not to even show the fuck up. I don’t know what’s been up with him but for the past year something in him completely shifted. He seems more smug.” JB said.

“I mean he is the maknae and yall let him get away with too much shit.” Zanai said. She shifted where she stood, hoping he wouldn’t notice her nervousness.

“You okay? You seem a little nervous. You sure nothing happened today?”JB asked.

“No it’s just been a long ass day. I need to shower.” Zanai said. As she headed towards her bedroom, she was stopped dead in her tracks by his next words.

“Who is he?” JB asked. Zanai turned around and looked him dead in the eyes. His jaw was clenched and his eyes were dead. Fuck she’d been caught.

“What are you ta-” He cut her off.

“Don’t fucking lie to me. I can fucking smell the sex on you. Who have you been fucking cuz it sure as hell wasn’t me.” JB said.

“JB-I-I’m sorry. It meant nothing I swear.” Zanai tried to grab his hand but he recoiled in disgust.

“How long?” JB asked.

“What?” Zanai replied.

“How long have you been fucking him?” JB asked. He really didn’t want to know the answer but he was sick of being in the dark in his own relationship.

“A year.” Zanai felt so ashamed. She’d hurt the one person she’d never thought she’d hurt and now she was going to lose him.

“Woooooow. So for half of our relationship you were with another man? What the fuck is wrong with you? Am I not enough for you?” JB asked.

“You are enough for me. Don’t say that.” Zanai cried.

“Obviously I’m not since you went out and got another dick. Tell me, does he fuck you better than I do?” JB demanded.

“JB………….” Zanai looked away.

“Well I guess I have my answer. Have a good life Zanai. We’re done.” JB said. He grabbed his things and moved to leave when Zanai grabbed his arm to stop him.

“Please don’t go.” Zanai pleaded.

“I SAID WE’RE FUCKING DONE!” JB yelled. With that he walked out and slammed her door.

Zanai was numb. She couldn’t believe that she just hurt him like that. She hated cheaters and knew how much that shit hurts from experience and now she’d inflicted that pain onto someone else. She was disappointed in herself and hated the person she’d become. Zanai finally headed to her room to shower and go to bed. She just wanted to sleep and never wake up.

*******************

The next morning Zanai woke up feeling like shit. She was completely drained and void of all emotion and feeling. She reached for her phone but soon remembered she’d left it in her bag.

Walking back to her living room, Zanai went to her purse to retrieve her phone. Once she pulled it out she saw that it was lit up with notifications. She was getting mentions and tags in all kinds of tweets and instagram posts. Choosing to ignore it she went back to her room to get ready for work. After what seemed like forever she was finally heading out of her apartment. Upon walking up to the JYP building, Zanai noticed that her key card wasn’t allowing her to open the door. She saw one of her fellow choreographers and waved to get her attention.

“Hey Yeojin my key card doesn’t work, can you let me in?” Zanai asked.

“Ummm sure.”Yeojin said. As she let her into the building, Zanai noticed how quiet everyone seemed and how they all stared at her.

“What’s going on?” Zanai asked.

“Uhh maybe we should go somewhere more private.”Yeojin said. Yeojin walked them to an empty practice room to talk.

“Okay what’s going on? Why was everyone looking at me like that?” Zanai demanded.

“Did you not check your phone this morning? It’s all over the news. Dispatch reported on it.” Yeojin said.

“Reported on what?” Zanai said. She was panicking.

“Your affair with Yugyeom. There’s pictures, texts, and even a video of you guys in bed together. All the major Korean news sites have reported on it.” Yeojin.

“Oh my fucking god. Has everyone seen it?” Zanai asked. Before Yeojin could answer there was a loud commotion in the hallway.

Zanai and Yeojin left the practice room to see JB throwing different objects and trying to get to Yugyeom. It took Jinyoung and Mark to hold him back. Once Zanai saw Yugyeom she walked up to him and gave him a hard smack across his cheek.

“Really? You just gon hit me?” Yugyeom said, holding his cheek.

“You’re the one that leaked the shit! How else would they have gotten all of that information? Why the fuck would you do that?” Zanai yelled.

“I fucking told you I loved you and you barely even acknowledged it. I got tired of you having your cake and eating it too.” Yugyeom said.

“So, what you leaked all of our business to teach me a fucking lesson? You’re fucking pathetic.” Zanai.

“No. What’s pathetic is you fucking your boyfriend’s bandmate then turning around and fucking him with my cum fresh on your tongue. How my kids taste JB?” Yugyeom bragged. JB lunged at him but Jinyoung andMark held him firm.

“Wooooow. You’re an asshole. I fucking hate you with all my heart.” Zanai said.

“I’ll be an asshole but you’ll forever be a cheater and now the whole world knows it. And if your key card wasn’t a hint, JYP fired your ass.” Yugyeom said. He walked away and right out of the building. Shocked at what her life has come to, she turned to face JB and the rest of the group.

“I’m so sorry guys. I never meant to hurt any of you. I promise this is the last time you’ll see me.” Zanai said. As she made her way to the door JB spoke out to her.

“Why wasn’t I enough for you? 2 years. I gave you 2 years. Why wasn’t I good enough?” JB asked.

“It wasn’t you. It was all me. I-I was drawn to him since the beginning and I let him draw me in. I knew it was wrong and I still did it. I’m a shitty person and you deserve better than me. You deserve a woman who won’t fuck your best friend and breakyour heart and humiliate you in front of the world. I really am sorry JB.” Zanai said. She said her goodbyes to her former co workers and headed out onto the streets of Seoul.

She knew her career in South Korea was over and she had no one to blame but herself. She’d destroyed her career and the man she loved. That’s something she’ll always have to live with. 

She’d made her messy ass bed and now she had no choice but to lay in it.

[ineffablecolors]

THE WIFE [3/?]

The Wife || Ch 3 ~ 5.3 k || Ch 1 Ch2 || FF.NET&AO3 Summary: No one knows all that Emma has been through and certainly no one knows all that Killian has been through and being husband and wife doesn’t make them any less unknown to each other. And really, how can you help someone heal when you don’t even know how hurt they are? A/N: Do check the notes on chapter 1 Eternal thanks to @csmarchmadness - if it wasn’t for this event, I probably wouldn’t have gotten my ass in gear and sat down to actually write this thing that is now so beloved to me already. And to all the ladies in the Discord chat - you bring laughter and fanfiction into my life so you’re basically goddesses and I wanna keep you forever. Hope you all enjoy this and follow along for the rest of the journey cuz I have plansTM! :D

To her utter surprise a week is all it takes for Emma to become more or less attuned to the workings of the Jones household.

Much as she guessed the very first morning, catching Killian Jones in the midst of breaking his fast is near impossible. Every morning, by the time she makes her way down to breakfast, no matter how early she tries to rise, the table is set and waiting but any trace of the master of the house is already gone. Usually, he is just down the corridor in his study but occasionally he is already out of the house, meeting his brother for matters of business, by the time Emma – let alone Alice – takes her first sip of tea.

She notices that he makes a point of always sharing at least one meal with her and his daughter and, more often than even Alice seems to expect, he manages to make time to join them for a ride in the afternoon. Indeed, Emma tries not to let her fancy fly away from her and make her feel more important than she has a right to but she can’t help suspecting that it’s her own timidity and anxiety about riding that makes him lend his services to them, seeing as Alice is an extraordinarily accomplished rider.

Emma herself is moderately pleased with the progress she has made. In all honestly, she suspects it was more daring and youthful confidence that made her a somewhat decent rider when she was much younger rather than any proper form or natural talent. But, contrary to her own musings, both Killian and Alice assert that she appears to be a natural and, most of all, that she has managed to make Buttercup fall in love with her with merely a few words and touches, whereas Alice proclaims that Jolly will still be much happier dashing away on her own and Killian begrudgingly admits – at Peter’s ribbing and his daughter’s teasing – that it took months of time spent on his ass in the dirt for him to prove himself worthy of Roger. After a week of almost daily exercise atop her own mare, Emma feels her tailbone tingle with sympathy at the mere thought.

And yet, she has never felt more pleasantly exhausted in her life. The fresh air of the countryside all around them and the emotional and then simply physically taxation of getting back on a horse have taken their toll but she finds herself unwilling to refuse every time Alice appears in front of her with her riding clothes already on.

Perhaps this is the reason she has been unable to awake early enough to catch her husband in his morning routine but it does not serve to explain why she also has yet to see or hear him retire to bed. Aside from that very first night – that she thinks can hardly be named their “wedding night” – she has never seen Killian heading for his bedchambers.

What she has seen is that the library is not as often engaged as she first thought it might be and thus, Emma has already spent many an hour familiarizing herself with its collection and the numerous artefacts from the brothers’ travels. And still, late as she burns her candle in that room, she never manages to make it to the point when Jones – presumably – heads to bed himself. Ruby and Mrs Lucas have on a couple of occasions now asked if she needed anything and bid her goodnight before retiring to their rooms but heading to bed after her husband has proven as impossible as rising from it before him.

Finding and securing the company of his daughter is much easier and that when Alice doesn’t put some scheme of hers into action first. Emma thinks she might be on her way to unravelling another small mystery, that of Alice’s permanent residence away from her home. It takes but a day in the girl’s presence to realize that, charming as it might be, Storybrooke is much too small to contain her. Emma is rather puzzled why Alice does not go more into society here but she can perfectly perceive how the city might be calling to her after a few weeks in her family home.

A home which has proven rather favourable to Emma’s disposition despite the complete chance introduced into her life. So it is with an almost quiet resignation that Emma gasps awake long before dawn on a summer day a little over a week after her nuptials.

Her heart does its damnest to beat out of her chest and the sweat on her back makes her shiver under all the blankets but she regains control of most of her faculties almost immediately and proceeds to deepen her breathing the way she has learnt will help bring awareness of her surroundings and dissipate the dream faster. Her toes are ice-cold but her need to get up makes the bed resemble hot coals beneath her so she dresses quickly, aware that she will not be going back to sleep until night has arrived anew.

As it is, she is forced to take her candle with her, the sun not even peaking over the horizon yet as she makes her way down the stairs as silently as possible. It is only as she heads for the kitchen – her mind on a glass of warm milk – that she entertains the notion that anyone might already be awake.

“—and this girl now. What is the purpose of this?” Mrs Lucas’s voice is gruffer than usual, smudged with sleep and something else Emma cannot place through the door.

“You could be a bit kinder to her,” as for Killian’s voice, it is crisp and clear – he might as well have been awake for hours.

“And you can tell me why it is that you took her in. Lord knows, you probably haven’t told a soul. If any has asked.”

It is in that moment that she realizes herself the topic of their conversation. Perhaps, if it was more in her nature or even, if she stopped to truly consider, Emma might have lingered quietly outside a few minutes longer and gleaned some of that much coveted and hard to obtain knowledge of her husband’s private thoughts. But the sharp shove she gives the door is almost instinctive and has the immediate effect of silencing everyone on the other side.

She may have brought secrets into this house but she does not wish to accumulate new ones while here.

When she walks in, Mrs Lucas looks for all the world as if Emma has been stumbling into the kitchen at ungodly hours of the morning ever since she got here. Killian’s face, however – and Emma has quickly learnt that, for all the coldness and irreproachability that he tries to paint on it, it is a painfully expressive one – is caught somewhere between surprised guilt and uncomfortable suspicion.

But Emma’s state is still rumpled enough and her eyes not quite open enough to alarm anyone and make them believe she could have been eavesdropping.

“Well, there is certainly no need to be this early,” the cook mutters under her breath as she rolls up her sleeve and barely spares Emma a glance.

“Perhaps you should inform Ruby that the sun, as well as us, will be up before her soon enough,” Killian suggests in rebuff and Emma tries not to jump out of her way when the old woman stalks past her, grumbling under her breath that they all might as well not go to bed at all anymore.

“There was no need—“ she starts but Killian waves his hand in the air before he runs it over his face.

“She has been itching to either have it out with me or get out of this room for some moments now. Your appearance ruled rather in my favour.”

Emma nods and clasps her hands in front of her, now questioning her decision to run downstairs from her troubled thoughts. Normally, she uses any opportunity to take a peek at Jones’s inner workings but she questions her current ability for casual conversation, let alone something deeper.

“Were you looking for something?”

“Oh, I was just going to get a glass of milk.”

Killian snaps his fingers as if he should have guessed her reason for being here, already turning toward the stove and thankfully missing her slight jump at the sharp sound. Watching his back, Emma is frozen with indecision.

Far as her sleep-muddled mind planned, she would’ve found the kitchen still quiet and empty and made the drink herself. In the event of Ruby or Mrs Lucas being up already, she most certainly would’ve debated letting them get on with their work and sorting herself out. She did not account for Killian at all and her inexperience with gentlemen of his stature – let alone his manner, which seems rather singular to her – makes her uncertain of how she should proceed.

Certainly it is more befitting for her to take over any tasks in the kitchen rather than him? Yet, she does not feel herself ingrained into the household enough to take any such initiative. So instead she stays where she is and observes with interest the way he moves around the kitchen, operating predominantly with his real hand.

The missing limb seems to impair him extremely rarely when riding and, reading and writing being the other two activities in which she has mainly seen him engaged, Emma has given little thought to what she supposes is a battle wound.

Then he comes to a sudden halt and she straightens along with him, worried that he has somehow sensed, and does not appreciate, her pointed attention.

“Actually… would you like something a bit different?” Killian glances over his shoulder, his manner easy enough that Emma feels her shoulders relax as his lips quirk up the slightest amount. “I believe I already pointed out that a soldier salute is unnecessary.”

Emma frowns in confusion, her brain taking a moment to assimilate the words in the morning light that has barely appeared behind the white curtains, and then she shocks them both with a short burst of laughter. It’s a quick and slightly hysterical thing but with it she feels the last of her dark dreams disperse and drops almost theatrically in one of the hard kitchen chairs.

“Something different?”

“Mm, are you fond of hot chocolate?”

“I cannot answer that, seeing as I have never tried it.”

To his credit, a singular eyebrow expresses Killian’s disbelief before he turns back to his preparations.

“As I told your sister-in-law, sugar is one of my grandmother’s archenemies.”

“Which doesn’t say much about sugar at all with how many she must have.”

“Mrs Jones was equally witty and condemning. You must all have a frightfully low opinion of my family.”

“Rather that singular relation.”

“Well—“ she opens her mouth to say that, vile as the woman is, she constitutes the whole of Emma’s family, before she realizes that is technically no longer the case. “She did say you have a weakness for it.”

“I beg your pardon?”

“Your sister-in-law. She said you also have a weakness for sugar.”

“Ah. Well, Elsa always likes to know where one’s strengths and weaknesses lie.”

“Then surely you must be flattered that is the only one she has found in you.”

“I can assure you that is not the case. But I do appreciate her choosing it as the one to expose on my wedding day. Now—“

He turns around with a pot in his hand and two cups, dangling by their handles from his little finger. Emma forces herself to remain seated, her hands in her lap and an expectant expression on her face.

Killian sets the cups down with a clatter and no saucers and starts pouring out a thick, dark liquid that makes her nose twitch with eagerness.

“A few centuries ago they used to stuff it full of spices but, as most good things, it’s best in its simplicity,” he nudges one cup toward Emma and takes his own, sitting across from her. “Though I will admit to a dash of cinnamon and vanilla.”

Emma takes the drink and gives it one more experimental sniff, despite the fact that the aroma has already made her mouth water with anticipation. She takes a small sip at first but that is enough – the warm liquid coasts her tongue in a way that simple milk could not have hoped to do – the taste and texture exquisitely rich, and then the flavours explode – teetering on the line between sweet and bitter, both smoothed and enhanced by the distinct kick of the cinnamon and the softness of the vanilla.

So focused on the sensations inside her mouth, she is quite unaware of what her face is doing, though Killian must not be because in the next second his laugh fills the gradually brightening kitchen. She would be rather offended, if it wasn’t for the fact that the sound is absolutely magnificent. That and he does seem – as is becoming usual – to delight in her reactions rather than mock them.

Emma takes another, more generous sip before she licks her lips and sets her cup down.

“Oh, you have made a believer out of me. Plain milk will never do again.”

“You should tell Mrs Lucas to increase her weekly purchase of the stuff then.”

“Me?” now she is very conscious of how her eyes widen with obvious dread of such an interaction.

“She does not actually bite,” Killian’s voice is reassuring but the glint in his eyes as he lifts his own cup to his mouth is anything but.

“With a bark like that I’m sure she does not need to.”

It’s more a snort than a laugh this time but Emma is much too distracted by the way his tongue flicks over his lips to clean them to mind.

In the golden morning light, now edging its way into every corner and crevice of the kitchen, with his jacket and waistcoat absent, his eyes flashing every once in awhile and his lips fitting themselves against the rim of his cup with obvious pleasure, Emma Jones rather likes her husband.

*****

Her knuckles pop a little as she tries to cover her yawn with the back of her hand.

“Why don’t you just go to bed?” Alice’s voice startles her – the girl has collected about a dozen cushions and pillows in front of the large fireplace in the library and is languidly making her way through The Odyssey and a pot of tea that Emma has refused to partake in. “You should know, tomorrow I will drag you out of doors, if I have to.”

Alice has certainly inherited her father’s cheek though not his preference for comfort of his own home. For it seems there is no greater offense to Miss Jones than remaining indoors on a “perfectly lovely summer day”. Indeed, on most days, Emma agrees with her with pleasure or at least without too much protest.

But the exceptionally early start of her day has left Emma both in good spirits and at the same time very reluctant to risk that pleasant, mellow feeling by quitting the house. So she showed some willfulness for the first time and postponed going to the seamstress from who they were to collect the last of her new wardrobe. Killian, receiving a substantial amount of correspondence before lunch, asked not to be bothered with such trifles and Emma hasn’t seen or heard him leave his study since. Alice was all too eager to exchange a trip to the shops for a long ride and was only temporary put out when Emma expressed her disinclination to join her.

So it is that she has spent most of her day learning the last details about the household from Ruby and going over the shopping lists – adding extra chocolate – with Mrs Lucas. Surprisingly the old woman displayed only her usual amount of annoyance in Emma’s presence and even accepted a suggestion or two she made (while declining another half a dozen, of course).

“You do not have to wait on me, I should be going to bed shortly,” Alice continues, breaking Emma out of her retrospection of her supposedly uneventful day. “And you certainly won’t be able to keep your eyes open long enough to see papa.”

“He was up early,” she replies before she can think to feign ignorance.

“He is always the first to light a candle in the mornings and the last to put it out in the evenings,” it is the first time she sees melancholy on Alice’s face, though, for a moment, something livelier and hopeful flashes through her eyes.

Emma frowns in thought – by her personal observations and calculations, it is simply impossible that Killian gets more than four or five hours of sleep.

They are silent long enough that Alice returns to her book and Emma watches the flames dancing in the fireplace – her own book abandoned on the little table beside her – and listens to the very stillness of the house. When the clock strikes 11, the fire is dangerously low and Emma is starting to feel a slight chill in the air. Alice leaves book, teacup and scattered furniture all as is and stretches her arms to the sides, declaring herself fit to go to bed. Her “goodnight” is rather pointed but her eyes are all softness and comfort and Emma stares after her for a minute or ten.

Then she jumps to her feet with a sudden burst of determination that she knows she must seize before it deserts her. A minute later she enters Killian’s study without knocking – Mrs Lucas would’ve probably dragged her out by the hair, if she had seen her.

“Why did you take me in?”

“I beg your pardon?” Killian’s head shoots up – his eyes are bloodshot from staring at the tiny figures before him under the light of a single candle. There is a half-full tumbler of golden liquid beside him but the room smells of wax rather than alcohol and Emma soldiers on.

“I know Regina was looking for a buyer and I know she didn’t expect to get half as good a deal as this. On top of the expenses of a wife, I’d wager she requested a nice commission for facilitating it all—“

“You would wager what exactly?” his voice is harsher than she has ever heard it directed at her and his scowl tells her how little he appreciates her brashness in this moment.

But she does not wish to be so tempted by answers that next time she has the opportunity to eavesdrop on some conversation, she does betray him.

“Nothing. For I have nothing. Some would say that I have ever less than a common girl and I know Regina—“

“Blast Regina. You think she was looking for a buyer?” Killian doesn’t jump to his feet the way she did earlier but the motion is somehow so powerful and full of agitation that Emma takes an instinctive step back. “Aye, that she was. And she wasn’t selling you the nice way either – quiet and private. She was getting desperate and acting like it was a bloody auction!”

She knew, of course. She knew Regina never cared for her and would sell her to the highest bidder. Her own metaphor aligns perfectly with Killian’s. And yet, hearing it from someone else’s mouth, having it confirmed that her grandmother shamelessly put her on the market like a piece of meat, makes her vision start to swim.

Emma tries to swallow around the lump in her throat and feels the tips of her nails digging into the flesh of her palm. Killian’s sharp exhale makes her vision sharpen a little as she tries to focus on him again – he looks rather stricken and she almost opens her mouth to assure him that he hasn’t really told her anything she didn’t already suspect.

“Emma, I—“ he takes a step forward then halts, looking as if he expects her to back away, and takes the next two slower, keeping his eyes on hers. “I’m sorry. I did not mean to—“

“So why did you bid?”

“What?”

She raises her chin and holds his gaze.

“If she was putting me out there like an auction piece, why did you bid?”

Killian slowly tilts his head to the side and regards her in silence and Emma tries to count her breaths so she doesn’t miss any. Finally, he sighs and hangs his head and for the first time since she barged into his study Emma feels like she has stepped out of line.

And for what?

“I will answer that.”

She blinks in surprise.

“Tomorrow. Can we do this tomorrow morning? I—“ he waves almost helplessly toward his desk and gives her a beseeching look.

“Alright.”

“Alright?”

She nods.

“But after the sun has properly risen.”

His mouth ticks up hesitantly on one side and he nods as well.

“After the sun is firmly anchored in the sky.”

“And maybe with that chocolate drink.”

“That can be arranged as well.”

“Alright.”

“Alright.”

She nods once more and turns on her heel.

“Emma. I am sorry, I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that.”

She turns back and lifts her shoulders, her eyes straying from his.

“I shouldn’t have barged in here like that.”

“One offense does not excuse another.”

“Hmm. I like that.”

“It won’t happen again.”

“Alright. I am not— You are forgiven.”

She is not sure this is the proper thing to say, it comes out sounding much haughtier than she wanted it to, not at all the sentiment she was trying to convey. But the look on Killian’s face stops her from regretting her choice of words.

“Goodnight, Killian.”

“Goodnight.”

“Go to bed.”

His chuckle behind her is tired but not entirely mirthless.

*****

She makes her way down the stairs and hopes with all her might to find Jones in the kitchen again. The library, let alone his study, will certainly hold the stale feeling of late night confusion and overexposed emotions.

Truth be told, by now Emma almost regrets posing the question that has been foremost in her mind ever since she heard Mrs Lucas put it into words, if not ever since she learnt she was to marry Killian Jones. Fairly gained intelligence is all good and proper but she is not entirely sure she is prepared to receive this particular piece of it.

Finding Killian where she hoped to restores a smidge of her confidence but she is still very conscious of the fact that – were he to act like nothing happened, she will allow it. Alas, if the look on his face is any indication, if he entertained the coward’s path at all, he decided to turn away from it.

“The sun is up, as requested. Should we make use of it and take a walk?”

Emma blinks in surprise. She considered the sturdy walls and dark tones of the house more befitting the conversation before them but now feels immense relief at the thought of fresh air and an open space.

Killian pushes off the counter and hands her a cup of what she assumes is hot chocolate and Emma’s straining nerves relax a little when her hand wraps around the warm cup – this one is bigger than the one he served them in the day before, its rim is not curved and instead it has a lid that she supposes will keep the liquid warm longer. For a moment, she wonders if Killian puts this much thought into every single action, if that is why he requested a whole night before he answered a straight question. It sounds both endearing and exhausting.

He holds the backdoor for her and they slip from the kitchen, the air much crisper than she expected.

“Would you like me to fetch you a coat?”

She shakes her head, knowing she will regret it soon enough and clutching her cup tighter. Then she turns to face her husband and, in the direct sunlight, comes to wonder if he has been to bed at all. His shirt and waistcoat are different but his hair looks like it has met with his hand rather than a pillow, the lines around his eyes seem deeper, the shadow under them – likewise.

He has not taken a drink for himself and – whether for his benefit or hers she wastes no time to determine – Emma slips her free hand in the crook of his right elbow. Killian startles but settles soon enough that she decides the gesture has been deemed acceptable.

“I believe it is of no use to do things by halves. So I’ve decided to give you more information than you were probably searching for, in order to make myself quite clear.”

His voice is gruff but not unkind and her surprise at this pronouncement is genuine but not unpleasant.

“I believe Mrs Mills has been struggling to maintain appearances while her finances have been failing her.”

Emma suspected as much herself but doubts she is aware of the full extend of Regina’s presumed troubles.

“I do not wish to be crude but I… I also believe she took stock of her valuables and decided you were the one she was most willing to part with.”

“I assure you, Regina would consider it much too great a compliment rather than an offense of any sort that I am being listed among her valuables.”

Killian glances at her before quickly looking away. He seems somewhat taken aback by her blasé attitude toward her grandmother’s mistreatment but even more so by the intimacy walking arm in arm has brought. Emma is fully aware that this is the closest she has been to her husband – physically speaking, but her main focus at the present moment is how close he is about to allow her in another sense.

“Yes, well… I think her mounting frustrations made her rather careless and… desperation is never a good calling card when the object is an engagement. Perhaps it wasn’t like that at first but— Emma, I am not sure you quite understand how far removed from society I am personally and how rare it is for gossip to make its way to my ears.”

She feels the blazing heat in her cheeks despite the morning chill that has control over most of the rest of her body. It’s a long time that she has been parted with her grandmother’s good – or at least tolerant – opinion and, as for society, Emma never much cared what gossip may spread about her, seeing as most of it will be deserved and she cared little for the company of people willing to be swayed by it.

Yet the idea of what whisperings might have reached all the way to the inhabitants of the Jones household makes the knot in her stomach tighten even further now.

“I do not wish to… to interrupt but I fail to see how that has led us… here.”

Killian sighs and, likely unconsciously, tightens his arm around her own.

“For that I need to… I will have to go further back. What I meant for you to take from this is that, knowingly or not, your grandmother was destroying your reputation and any future aspirations with an alarming – frankly, almost impressive, speed.”

When she lifts the cup to her mouth, it shakes a little in her grasp and Emma tries to tell herself that if the answer to why Killian Jones brought her into his family is pity, it is not the worst answer she could have received.

“My previous wife did not hold our daughter in much higher esteem than your grandmother seems to hold you.”

The change of topic is so sudden that her neck pops a little when she twists in his direction. He glances at her – his smile is tight and dark and his steps almost cease for an instant before he resumes the brisk pace that has been keeping her from truly suffering the coldness that the sun is still working on chasing away.

“Of course, I do not pretend to know the nature of your relationship but at the very least you were allowed to remain in Mrs Mill’s presence. My wife did not allow Alice the same courtesy and send her away to school as soon as such a scheme was feasible. A-and she could carry it out without my knowledge.”

Emma bites her tongue against the barge of questions bubbling up from inside her. Why would any mother want to be parted from her child? She supposes her indignation might be finding some outlet through her eyes but Killian’s are firmly focused on the trees in the distance. She is glad for it because – even as most of her anger is directed toward a woman now in her grave, she cannot quite understand why Killian would submit to such an arrangement after it was made known to him.

“When Alice was old enough and confident enough in herself to express her wish to remain at home for longer periods of time – and received my full support of the idea – her mother adopted a new method of keeping her away.”

Killian watches their feet advancing slowly for a few seconds and Emma takes a fortifying breath.

“My daughter found herself in much the same position as you, only much earlier in her life and, sadly, there could be no question of whether her chances and reputation was being ruined on purpose or not.”

“How could she—“

Killian’s jaw tightens and Emma stops herself from finishing the question.

“I do not mean to present my conduct in a more altruistic light than it deserves, Emma. My brother and his wife were much engaged in the task of introducing me to as many ladies as a man who does not attend dances and dinners could possibly meet. And it was my hope – for whose fulfilment I do wish to express my gratitude to you – that my daughter’s age and temperament would not set the two of you at odds and that your introduction into the family will provide sufficient reason for her to remain here for some time.”

She has drawn and discarded a dozen conclusions in the span of the last quarter of an hour and for each question that has been answered in some form a dozen more have arisen, but if Emma is uncertain that she can receive any more information at present, she is quite certain that Killian cannot give any more with additional pain to himself.

And if there is one conclusion that she has drawn and put safely away as fact, it is that she does not wish to cause Killian Jones any pain.

“So how bad is it?”

“I beg your pardon?”

“How far did Regina go before you could get to her? How bad of a blow is it to be married to me?”

It is the first time since they stepped outside that Killian comes to a firm stop and she tries not to give in to the shiver and stab of pain when he lets go of her arm so he can face her.

“I am a man who has taken many blows in his life, Emma.”

The pointed motion with his wooden hand surprises her but not nearly as much as the warmth of the fingers that settle under her chin and gently urge it up.

“I can assure you, you’re not one of them.”

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[queen-scribbles]

The Usual Places

For @pillarspromptsweekly #89: Eora Day. I went with Ederity, cuz I’ve been dying to write them married(!) and anything that involves planting things is right up Charity’s alley. ;)

Charity was usually easy to find, at least in Edér’s experience. She was a creature of habit who gravitated toward a handful of places; the Dracogen, her gardens, their private chapel, or somewhere inside their house. Until recently--when his-or-hers had become theirs--Edér’s house would have also made the list. But they lived in her farmhouse now, and only kept his old house for nights work had him in town too late. There wasn’t much cause for either of them to visit it often anymore, effectively lowering the number of places he could (probably)find his wife.

She was not in any of the usual places today, but she was still easy to find. Planting, as usual. Only this time, it wasn’t vegetables or flowers, but a trio of young, almost reed-thin trees. She’d still clearly had fun; mud smeared up to her elbows and knees, smile even more sunshine-bright than usual, a small flush of sunburn tinging her cheeks and the bridge of her nose.

“Looks like you’ve had a good day,” Edér laughed as he approached. 

“Very good,” Charity confirmed. She stood and smoothed frizzies toward her bun with the back of one hand, streaking mud across her forehead. “Hendyna an’ I rescued these from a swampy patch near the Crossing. They wouldn’t’ve grown there, too much water in the soil. Here they’ll do great, an’ they’ll give us shade, and, you know...” she winked a him, “hopefully they’ll be sturdy enough to climb by the time we have a gaggle of tiny Teylecgs runnin’ around lookin’ for adventure.”

“A gaggle?” he said with mock-dismay, kissing her cheek. “How many kids’re you plannin’ on gettin’ out of me, woman?”

“If you wanna get picky about it, they’re gonna be comin’ outta me,” Charity retorted with a laugh, smearing mud down the front of his shirt as she playfully pushed him away. “And many as Hylea gives us. Why?”

“Just wanna know what I’m in for,” Edér teased. He gathered some of the mud from his shirt with one finger and smudged it along her nose. “And you realize you’re the one who’s gonna hafta wash this, right?”

“Yeah,” she shrugged, wiping the mud off her nose with the tail of her own shirt. “It’s just mud. I already got plenty of that”--she gestured at her own clothes--”what’s one more shirt?”

“Alright then...” he said, glancing at the trees. They were all firmly planted, spaced to accommodate future growth, and flanked by support posts. “You all done out here?”

“For now, yes,” Charity said with a nod. “A gardener’s work is never done an’ all, but I’m through for the day.”

“Good.” He peeled off the muddy shirt and draped it over her shoulder. “I’m gonna start dinner while you get cleaned up and deal with the dirty clothes.” He winked and tipped her chin up to steal a kiss before heading inside the house. Charity laughed as she followed, and Edér wondered just how tempted she was to rub mud on him, too.

However great the temptation was, she didn’t give in. She instead lingered in the vestibule long enough to strip off her boots and all the muddy clothes, wiping her hands and arms mostly-clean on the shirt before heading for the bedroom. “So, what’re we having for dinner, darlin’?”

“Nothin’ fancy; I’m pretty wiped out,” Edér admitted as he perused their options. Looked like they had the fixings for vegetable soup, which wouldn’t be too hard. Would be better if they had some venison or rabbit to toss in, but this would be fine.

“Everything alright?” Charity asked over the sound of splashing water.

“Yeah, just a long day,” he promised. “An’ I didn’t get to enjoy the pretty weather like you did.”

“Well, half the day was spent in a swamp huntin’ down medicinal mosses,” she said, leaning into view half-dressed and face still glistening with water. “Kinda hard to enjoy good weather when you’re almost knee-deep in sludge-water and bein’ eaten alive by midges. But we did find what we were lookin’ for.”

“Plus trees,” Edér grinned as he gathered up the vegetables.

“Plus trees,” Charity nodded in agreement. She smiled slyly and waited until his hands were full to toss him a clean shirt. “Here.”

He shot her a dirty look in the brief moment before the garment landed half over his head and half draped over the vegetables he carried. “Nice, Char. You wanna put on some pants an’ help me cut these up?” He couldn’t keep the amusement out of his voice, not that he was trying terribly hard.

She giggled. “Sure. The dirty clothes aren’t goin’ anywhere.”

Edér set down the vegetables and pulled on the shirt. “So... any particular reason for the trees?” he asked, voice slightly raised so she could hear, before he started cutting.

There was a soft grunt as Charity wriggled into a pair of pants. “Didn’t want ‘em to die.” She padded back into the kitchen, picked up another knife to help. “Trees are good to have. And the shade’ll be nice, once they get a little bigger, like I said.”

“All true,” he said with a nod, nudging aside the sliced-up carrots and reaching for potatoes. “They’ll help balance out that monstrous oak Soren just cut down ‘cause it was messin’ up his mulberry bushes.”

“What?!” Charity scowled, hands stilling halfway through chopping celery. “The man’s drownin’ in mulberry bushes, he couldn’t sacrifice a couple t’ let the thing keep growin’? It’s been there forever!”

Edér raised an eyebrow at her vehemence and reached over to tuck back an escaped tendril of her hair. “Darlin’, he’s drownin’ in them ‘cause it’s how he makes a livin’,” he reminded her. “An’ it wasn’t just a couple; the tree roots were threatenin’ near a dozen of the bushes. Yeah, he needs t’ keep ‘em on his land but he’s got a right to keep ‘em growin’ strong.”

Charity sighed and played with her necklace. “I know,” she groaned. “But it was such a great tree.”

“Hey,” he leaned over and kissed her temple. “Maybe ours’ll be even better.”

She laughed as she resumed cutting the celery. “Maybe. But not for a good long while; they’re still babies, as trees go.”

“Well, then it’s good that they’re here. You got a special knack for makin’ things grow,” he winked.

“Growin’ things and fixin’ kith, my two special talents,” she said with a smile.

“Don’t forget singin’ the praises of my cookin’,” Edér teased. “You’re also the best at that.”

“Only b’cause it’s such a sharp contrast to mine,” Charity laughed wryly. “An’ I think you’re forgettin’ how much Tavi likes your cookin’.”

“Nah.” He shook his head and winked. “She’s never kissed me to show her appreciation.”

“Well, that’s a relief to hear,” she deadpanned. “Might make our friendship awkward.”

Edér laughed at that as they finished cutting up the vegetables, then Charity left him with a kiss on the cheek to do the actual cooking part while she took care of the muddy clothes. Once the soup was simmering, he sat down on the couch and nearly fell asleep waiting for it to cook. This was not helped in the slightest by Charity sitting in her usual spot--next to him--to knit in comfortable silence until dinner was ready. It was, as a result, the closest he ever came to burning something.

Good thing he caught it in time to avoid that. He never would have lived it down. As it was, the vegetable were just a little on the too-soft side, but still good, They enjoyed their meal, peppered with the usual “How was your day?” small talk and discussing what might come in the next few, before returning to their spots on the couch. They snuggled close, despite how much it increased the risk of falling asleep there. It wouldn’t be the first time, or the last, and certainly wasn’t the oddest non-bed place the two of them had fallen asleep.

At least here’s comfortable, Edér thought contentedly, rubbing Charity’s back. Of all her “usual places”, tucked neatly under his arm was his personal favorite. And judging by her happy hum, she was pretty fond of it herself.

[queeniewritesce]

Shall We Dance 6/?

Lucy lazily opened her eyes, blinking to adjust to the light feeling the room, streaming from the beautiful arch windows near her side of the bed. Her head throbbed a little, she felt sore in places that hadn’t been used in quite some time, and she admonished herself for not taking some ibuprofen before falling asleep last night.

She tried to move but a firm hand gripped her waist, keeping her in place, digits digging the soft skin of her tummy. She turned her head, carefully to not worsen her headache, and regarded the sleeping man by her side; apparently, they were both stomach sleepers, arms under the pillow type of people and she wondered if that was uncomfortable for him, as he was not lacking on that department. Like, at all. She giggled quietly at her teenager mentality, studying the beautiful profile of Chris’s face, fingers itching to get closer, to lose themselves in the soft fur covering his jaw, trace the fullness of the lips that had driven her crazy the night before.

Ghost memories heated her skin as she slid out of the bed, padding softly to the bathroom, her thighs protesting the burn his beard imposed upon them, the sensation not dissimilar to the friction the pole created when learning a new move, but much more pleasant. She washed her face and used his moisturizer, the mirror showing her the purple marks he left on her neck and the top of her breasts, hair in disarray, and a small grin graced her face. She had been loved hard, and she reveled in every minute of it.

Lucy glanced at Chris’ sleeping form, grabbing his folded sweater and her socks and quietly slipping from the room, Dodger following behind her.

“Morning Dodger,” the stairs were cold on her bare feet as she descended. She makes quick work of his sweater, smelling the collar and folding the cuffs. She pulls on the thick socks while scanning the living room, locating her purse on a side table and to find a hair tie, tying a messy bun on top of her head. She grabbed her phone, opening the small bottle of Advil she always kept with her to grab two pills and walked back to the kitchen, where Dodger sat patiently by the door. “Listen, I’m not too keen on the idea of the alarm going off when I open that door, so I’m really sorry, but there won’t be any visits outside till your dad wakes up, alright?”

She could’ve sworn the dog ruffed before a small whine escaped him. Lucy spotted the treat jar on the island and gave the pooch two small ones as a peace offering. Satisfied, she opened the fridge, grabbed a bottle of water and sat on the same stool she had occupied yesterday, unlocking her phone. She sends Penny a quick message saying she won’t be back till later because Chris is taking her to one of the museums and snorts when her sister’s reply is a bunch of eggplant emojis. Siobhan is next and she asks about Morris, quickly retelling what happens without naming Chris and promising to call soon. There’s a message from JP enquiring if Garret’s plan was to propose on Christmas’ Day, and she thinks it’s odd, ‘why wouldn’t he ask Garret directly instead of asking me?’, she ponders and decides to call her brother later. Her last new message is from Sunny, inviting Lucy to stop by whenever she has the chance. She replies explaining they’ll arrive early on the 23rd, maybe she could have dinner with the family that night.

Opening Instagram, she clicks the plus sign, it’s a habit to always post something about the latest football game she attends; a picture of everyone she’s with, a few words about the game and when the Patriots were involved, a sarcastic remark about Tom Brady. She scrolls through her photos and it suddenly hits her she can’t share the incredible day she had yesterday. Not only all pictures feature Chris, either smiling to the camera or in the background, but he’s also in every quip and every joke she can think of writing. Sure, her account was private, but when was the last time she weeded out her followers? She sighs and closes the app, adding the task to her mental to-do list.

“I was about to file for my missing sweater, but it looks so much better on you than it does on me.” Chris’s voice is right behind her and she jumps a little, but she smiles and spins the stool around to look at him. “Even when paired with those goddamn awful socks.”

“I have cold feet.” Her eyes follow him around and she licks her lips at the sight of the half-naked man turning on the coffee maker, sweatpants hanging dangerously low on his hips and she is almost certain that is the only piece of clothing he’s wearing.

“I kinda noticed that.” He pats Dodger on the head before disarming the alarm and opens the kitchen door, a very happy dog now bouncing on the fresh snow outside. “You might want to have that checked, I believe they’ve frozen some time ago and you just haven’t noticed.” Chris grins at her indignant face and she scowls at him, trying to elaborate a good comeback when he invades her personal space. “Good morning, gorgeous.”

He’s pressed right at her side when he speaks those last words, tilting her head back and kissing her soundly, the hands on her neck keeping her in place, and does she really need to breathe because she just wants to kiss him forever. Her whole body awakens, his touch moving like lightning on her skin. Her palms sprawl over his chest, fingers combing the short hairs covering the muscles and she’s delighted at the small moans coming from him. Sadly yes, they do need air to live and so they part, foreheads touching, fingers caressing and smiles on their faces.

“I believe it’ll be, yes.” She eyes him as he draws on her skin, following the pattern of the cherry tree branches on her arm, reaching the last flower perched near her inner elbow and she tenses. As wonderful as he is, they barely know each other, the scars on her forearm and wrists are part of the demons that plague her dreams, ones that she’s not willing to discuss. She feels better when his fingers skip the scars, going straight to her palms and tangle themselves with her own, bringing her hand up to kiss the knuckles.

“How about some breakfast?” He offers while his mouth skims over her hands. “There’s this great place right around the corner that serves breakfast till 3 p.m., we can walk over there and get my car afterward, go to the Museum?”

“Breakfast food for lunch?” her stomach grumbles at the mention of food. “I was gonna make a joke about it being so very un-Hollywood of you, but as you heard it, parts of me are already on board with the plan. But I do need coffee first.”

“As milady wishes.” He goes back to find two cups in the higher cabinet, grabbing the creamer from the fridge and setting it all on the island in front of her before seating by her side, “How are you feeling today?”

“I woke up with a bit of a headache, a little sore too, but I took some Advil when I came down, I’ll be right as new in a few hours.” She rests her chin on her hands watching as he scoots the chair closer to hers, knees touching as he runs slow circles on the small of her back.

“I’m sorry about the soreness baby, but damn, it was a tight fit, I almost blew my load when I first entered you, you felt so good.”

He says it like he’s commenting on the weather, not of giving her the best sex of her life. Her cheeks felt warm; the man had no filter, did he?

“It’s been a while since I last fooled around with anyone, it’s been mostly me and my hand for the past twenty months.” Apparently, she had no qualms talking about it with him either. Lucy felt at easy with Chris, from the first time they looked at each other she felt like a missing piece of herself finally found its way home. How would she keep going after today? She shook her head to clear her head, she wouldn’t think about that now. “And you're going around with a large concealed weapon in those pants. How do you get past TSA with that?”

He laughs with a deep bass guffaw, slapping his knee.

“Wanna give me a pat down, Officer Seabrook?” a waggle of his eyebrows had her chuckling before he got serious. “But almost two years baby, are New Yorkers that blind? You look smoking hot, do not give me that look, ‘cuz you do. I’d be following you around like a lost puppy for that ass alone.”

“There were plenty of opportunities, it’s just… It never felt right, I guess? I…” she stopped, unsure about giving up too much of her past. What was with this guy and the need to know all her secrets? And what was up with her and wanting to tell them all to him, hoping he wouldn’t run away screaming?

“Then I’m extremely glad it felt right yesterday. Because it felt right to me too, the moment you walked into that room? I was a goner. You had me at hello and all that shit.” He grinned at her over his cup, but she could tell his eyes were studying her and at some point, they would come back to this conversation.

“And all that shit uh? You’re such a romantic. Wait, the fact that you even know that the movie is awesome enough. It’s one of my favorites”

“Figures you’d have the hots for Tom Cruise being angsty as fuck” He laughed and batted away the packet of Splenda she threw at him.

“Oh shush, he’s not angsty, he’s had a revelation and it’s acting upon it. Plus, the ‘show me the money scene’ is already movie history.”

Chris lets Dodger back inside before grabbing the coffee pot, and he sits facing, a sheepish grin on his face while he poured himself a cup.

“So, if you had to choose, wine or coffee?” he asks as he prepares his drink; three sugars, a splash of creamer.

“Coffee, no doubts about it. I love wine but by this point in my life, I have coffee running in my veins instead of blood. There’s no way I could give the liquid gold up.” She pours half a cup, skipping the sugar and filling the other half of the cup with the creamer.

“What the hell,” he eyes her cup suspiciously, “that is not coffee baby, that’s an insult to anyone who drinks coffee.”

“Says the person who puts enough sugar in his cup to rotten teeth.” She scoffs before taking a long drink. “Delicious.”

“Oh my god, you’re one of those girls.” Chris grabs his chest, pretending it hurts. “You order a PSL at Starbucks.” He finishes with a low, horrified voice, whipping an imaginary tear from his eye.

Lucy was glad she wasn’t drinking when he finishes because she laughs so hard, she snorts.

“One hot, venti, two-shot, almond milk, no whip pumpkin spice latte. I’m a basic bitch who loves her PSL, so sue me.” She shrugs and brings her cup to her lips, sipping slowly.

“I bet the barista knows your name and draws a smile on the damn cup too.” He raised an eyebrow at her, and she smiled over the brim of the cup, giving a little shrug. “I knew it!”

“There’s a store on the same block of my apartment and it’s on the way to the subway, they’ve been there since I moved to New York, of course they know me by name by now.” Pouring more coffee into her mug, she acknowledges, “This is absolutely delicious though, it’s Hawaiian Kona coffee, right?”

“Color me impressed.” Chris grins, nodding his head. “It’s one of the few things I splurge on, I have the company send a few beans bags every month to wherever I am staying. I refuse to drink the goo they serve at most places when I’m doing press for a movie.”

“You’re a coffee diva.” She states, amused by his confession.

“Some people hate green M&Ms, I hate bad coffee.” He concedes laughing. “I even provide the coffee, it’s not like they have to go and buy it, you know? Just follow the instructions or let my assistant make it and I’m a happy guy.”

“What is that like, having an assistant?” Lucy glances at Chris, untrimmed beard, mussed hair, no shirt, ratty sweats and barefoot. Incredibly good looking, but more of guy-next-door than a movie star, she almost forgot he was more than Garret’s hot best friend.  Their worlds differed so much, she couldn’t imagine having someone on her beck and call, or worst, a publicist. That gave her pause and she pursed her lips in thought while he responded.

“It’s weird at first, someone controlling your schedule, telling you where you need to be and when. But you get used to it so fast, especially since they seem to know exactly what you need and they deliver it, you know? Almost like a superpower, they learn how to read you and anticipate your moods.” Chris pondered and looked away embarrassed when he continued. “It’s… convenient. If you’re not careful you can get lost inside the Hollywood lifestyle, get jaded by the lights and you end up forgetting who you truly are. It almost happened to me once and I swore I wouldn’t let it happen again. It’s one of the reasons Tobias stays in Los Angeles whenever I’m here, I can take care of myself, I can be Chris.”

His words reassured her, but one question lingered. He was famous, he had an image to protect. As Samuel clearly reminded her, most people only saw her as a glamourized, overweight, stripper. She turns to face him, “Do I have to sign an NDA? Would pictures of the two of us together be bad for you?”

“What, Lucy, NO.” he shakes his head startled. “First of all, NDAs are ridiculous, they rarely work, I know that first hand. Maybe if you’re into some hard kink sex and doing it with random people, then okay, an NDA would be ideal, but I don’t ask people who I sleep with to sign them. And no, a picture of us together wouldn’t be bad for my image, it might stir some pots because some people believe they can dictate who I date…” Shaking his head, he grabbed her hand, linking their fingers together. “I know we’re still getting to know each other but one thing you should know is that I rarely give a fuck to what the media or the general public think of me. I keep my people close to my vest, I don’t talk about friends and girlfriends in interviews, but that’s because it isn’t anybody’s business what I do on my personal time. But I won’t shy away from being around someone I care about either. If a picture leaks or if they follow me when I’m with someone, I set my publicist on their cases because they are assholes, but the one thing I won’t do is to acknowledge their presence or react to them. It’s what they want, and I learned to tune them out.”

“I’m sorry doing what you love comes with so much bullshit involved.” Her thumb rubbed circles on his palm, in a soothing manner, her free hand combing his tousled hair. “Just so you know, if you decide a week from now that maybe I should sign one of those ridiculous things, I’d do it.”

“Thank you. The fact that you offered is enough.” Chris leaned into her hand, almost purring from the feeling of her fingers massaging his scalp. He closes his eyes, enjoying the moment and Lucy wants to save this forever, a perfect reminder of their time together.

He tastes of coffee when she kisses him, molding her mouth over his, dragging her lips sweetly across his own. She tastes like cream when his tongue touches hers, light touches that entice her, coaxing her lips to follow his when he retreats, seeking more, needing more.

The whiskers on his face tease her skin when he drags a line from her mouth to her neck, nipping hard at the pulse point, sucking the skin to sooth the bite. She gasps at how pleasurable the tiny amount of pain feels, fingers splashed on his hair, pulling him back till she devours his mouth, taking the lead.

His hands are everywhere, cupping her neck to hold her in place, squeezing the soft flesh of her breasts, gripping her thighs, finally circling her waist to bring her closer to him, hiking up legs over his, making the sweater she’s wearing ride up, his eyes popping when he realizes she’s not wearing anything under it.

“Such a naughty girl you are baby.” Chris murmurs against her mouth with a grin.

“I’m full of surprises.” She pulls the string securing the pants and it pools on the V of his abdomen, his cock springing upwards to rest against his belly. “I see I’m not the only one not wearing underwear.” Fingernails rake on the hard muscles of his abdomen while her teeth do the same to his collarbone, biting his neck. A thumb grazes the silky skin of his head and he twitches underneath her palm, his soft moans delighting her.

Her sweater is halfway up her body now, a large hand cupping the globes of her buttocks, while the other is busy massaging a hard nipple. Ripples of hot lava dances over her with every pass of his finger.

“I love how responsive you are, how you look ready to cum just with me playing with your tits.” Chris lowers his head to take a hard peak in his mouth when Lucy hears the low rumble of his stomach, making her raise an eyebrow at him. He ignores it and shushes her with a kiss, slating his mouth over her giggling lips, bringing her back to the moment.

A second, louder rumble follows. There is a pause and their eyes open, green meeting blue, mouths pressed together turning to grins before they are both laughing.

“I guess I’m hungry.” He remarks.

“When was the last time you ate something?” a hand smooths down her sweater when she stands up.

“I had a pretty nice snack last night.” A wiggle of his brows had her punching him on the shoulder as she narrows her eyes at him, still laughing.

“Oh my god, you’re such a man Christopher.”

“Glad you noticed babe.” He embraces her, kissing her shoulder. “Come on, we can shower together and save time.”

..__..__..__..__..

Showering together did not save time, she remarks when Chris closes the door behind him. It’s almost noon when they finally leave his house, all bundled up, gloved hands clasped together. There was no snow right now, but it’s supposed to start back late afternoon, so the plan was to be back home before that.

Lucy wasn’t sure exactly what he meant. Would he drop her off at Garret’s house after their outing (she didn’t dare call it a date) or would they go back to his place together? Sure, she understood the concept of one-night stands; she’d had her fair share of them but spending the day with one of them was never part of the deal, they had never asked, always leaving her house before the sun was up. In the beginning, she didn’t care about them leaving, her walls kept her safe, away from heartbreak. She had given herself away twice before and she had the scars, emotional and physical, to remind her not try it again.

Being single wasn’t something that bothered Lucy like it had bothered Penny or Siobhan and, unlike her sister and her best friend, she had welcomed it, focusing her energy and passion into dancing. She was proud of what she had accomplished in the last twelve years, the dance studio was thriving, she had made a name of herself and was now giving back to the community as much as she could.

Yet she now yearned for more. She couldn’t pinpoint exactly when that happened but somewhere in the last six months the feeling snuck up on her and was now part of her daily routine, accompanying her from dusk to dawn. She pushed it aside, tried to bury it under her work but, no matter how late she stayed in her studio, how hard she danced, how tired she was, the loneliness that greeted her when she arrived home made her ache.

She wanted what JP had with Marianna. She wanted what she saw between Penny and Garret.

She had no idea how to get it.

Her eyes glanced over at the man walking beside her. Chris was funny, charming, interested in what she had to say and what she did for a living. It didn’t hurt the whole package was contained inside a sinful body, and boy, did he know how to use that body. She shook her head. This was a one-time thing, it’s not like he would want to see her again.

“We’re here,” Chris announced with a muffled voice, concealed beneath the heavy scarf covering his mouth, pointing to the red stone building that occupied the corner of the block they just turned. “The food here is amazing, you can’t go wrong with anything really.”

Lucy looks up before they enter and sees a neon sign with Mike’s City Diner written on it. The place had an old school vibe, a red, black and white theme that reminded her of the diner in Cooperstown, the one she went to almost every day after school for milkshakes and grilled cheese, or for family breakfast during the weekend. She’s about to ask if he comes here often when his name is called by a pretty brunette wearing an apron with the diner’s logo on it.

“Hi Chris,” the woman is all teeth and pink lipstick when she winks at him. Lucy tries to not pay attention to the way the hand, not coffee pot squeezes his biceps in hello.

“Hi, Corinne. Is my table occupied?” he questioned, removing his winter gear.

“It is, but the booth next to it is free, if you seat turned to the back wall, I’m sure no one will bother you. We’re past the rush hour anyway.” She grabs a couple of menus from the counter and leads them to the very back of the restaurant, away from the windows. “I’ll bring some fresh coffee for you.”

Chris helps Lucy out of her coat and mentions for her to get in first. He slides next to her and wraps an arm around her back, pulling her closer.

“I take you’re a regular?” She asked while reading over the menu.

“Yeah, I come almost every day when I’m not at my mom’s house. I’m an okay cook, but breakfast food is my favorite and I rather not screw it up.” He nods, not even looking up at the menu. “Very kind people, delicious food, most patrons are either engrossed on their food or too deep in conversation to notice me, which is a plus.”

“I grew up going to a very similar diner back home. My friends and I would spend whole afternoons at Patty’s, doing homework and playing the arcade games he’d kept in the back room. He was the sweetest guy, always looking out for the town’s kids, running fundraisers for a neighbor in need… And the food was so, so good.” Wistful eyes looked around the place, taking in the decor and the warm way the waiters would talk to the customers.

Corinne approached with a smoking pot of coffee, sashaying her mint skirt as she did. She poured Chris’s coffee and points the pot to Lucy in question. “Want some, sugar?”

“Please.”

“Alright, you guys know what you want?” she placed the pot on their table, whisking out a white pad.

Chris signaled Lucy to go first and she orders cinnamon walnut waffles with a side fruit, saying no to the meat.

“I’ll have the Dynamic Duo with bacon and scrambled eggs. And she wants cream, lots of it.” Chris says with a teasing smile.

“I can drink my coffee black, you know?” Lucy huffs after Corinne leaves them alone.

“Yes, but do you like it?” He gives her a pointed look, a lone eyebrow raised at her.

That was so unfair, who could resist that damn eyebrow?

“No,” she answers with a pout.

He laughs and steals a quick kiss. “So, no meat?”

“No meat. I can’t call myself a vegetarian because I love cheese and eggs and still indulge in some seafood, but it’s been almost ten years since I decided to stop eating red meat, eight since I last ate chicken.”

“Impressive. Hemsworth is thinking about adopting a plant-based regimen on our next bulk up. We’ve been discussing it for a while.” He plays with the empty sugar packets, sighing. “I don’t think I could do it.”

“Chris, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. I don’t know the guy, but if he’s your friend I’m sure he’ll understand.” Her hand closes around his, giving it a squeeze. “Quitting anything is hard, my friend Terry has been trying to stop drinking soda since I first met him, sometimes he goes months without a single drop, other times he drinks Coke for breakfast, lunch, dinner and midday snacks.”

“Don’t I know it. I’ve quit smoking maybe a dozen times now. But I pick it back up whenever I’m stressed or if I go clubbing a lot.” He picks her hand up, dropping each finger on the table only to do it again. “I stopped after I broke up with my last girlfriend.”

Lucy pursued her lips. She once had called Penny to see how her sister was doing and throughout the conversation, Penny had been curt with her, until Lucy snapped and decided to end the call. That was when Penny apologized and explained she was mad by proxy because Chris’ girlfriend was being a bitch, divulging personal details about their relationship. Lucy didn’t know the actress was, but she instantly disliked the woman.

“Uh, so maybe a good thing come out of that?” her smile was sympathetic.

“Yeah,” Chris gave her a warm smile. “I was single when I met you.”

“And if you weren’t?” it was a serious question disguised within a light smile.

“Here’s the thing, I don’t cheat. I may be a shitty boyfriend at times, especially with all the traveling and time away from each other, but cheating? That is inexcusable.” His eyes were fixed on hers when he continued and the intensity she found in those eyes made her squirm in her seat. “Had I been dating someone I’d have watched you from afar, cursing whatever deity for giving me a glimpse of yourself when they’d know I couldn’t act on it… The truth is I would have left the game. I was drawn to you like a compass needle is drawn to the north and I wanted you. Anything from the moment we said hello would be considered cheating in my book.”

A flustered laugh escaped Lucy’s mouth; she wasn’t expecting any of what he said, admittedly his stand on cheating mirrored hers but the other half of his speech floored her. Never had a man been so candid in his interest towards her and she was at a loss for words.

She was saved by the arrival of a boisterous man who introduced himself to her as Jay, the owner of Mike’s City Diner. He and Chris shared that typical bro hug after he set down the plates.

“I took the liberty of making your waffle with almond milk when Corinne told me you said no meat.” He had an accent she couldn’t place it. “I hope it is to your liking.”

“That’s very thoughtful, thank you.” She took a bite of the waffle and moaned at the taste, speaking between bites. “This is amazing Jay, best waffle ever.”

“Thank you. I’m happy you like.” He looked between Chris and Lucy. “It is the first time you bring woman with you. Corinne was… disappointed. I can see why she can’t compete with your chosen fire head. Beautiful woman.”

“Keep it up and I’ll tell Janet you’re hitting on my girl.” Chris pointed his forkful of pancakes at Jay, before popping it in his mouth.

“Janet more prettier than Lucy because Janet is my wife.” Jay grinned at them. “I’ll leave you to your food. Wonderful day friends.”

She busied herself with another forkful of waffles and strawberries, trying not to focus too much on Chris calling her his girl.

“Don’t mind Jay, he’s a flirt. Didn’t I tell you the food was good?” Chris drizzled more syrup on his pancakes. “The man is a breakfast food king if I was a billionaire I’d hire him as my personal breakfast chef!”

“But you gotta eat more than just breakfast though. Who would you hire for dinner service?” she dumped most of the cream in her coffee, smirking when Chris cringed.

“Uhm… that’s a tough one.” He stroked his beard in thought. “Either Tyler Florence or Jeff Mauro… I’m going with Jeff Mauro; I love sandwiches and he is the king. What about you?”

“I don’t even need to think about it, it’s all about the good vanilla and the Italian mascarpone! Ina Garten is the Barefoot Contessa for a reason.” She observed.

“Now that would cost you an arm and a leg.” Chris countered. “And if you want Jeff to go make the cheese in a climate-controlled cave in Connecticut, then you’d be bankrupt by the next dinner service.”

“But she told me store bought was fine.”

“Store bought is never fine.” He gasped in mock horror.

Trying to contain her laugh had Lucy wiping away the moisture from the corner of her yes. “I can’t believe you watch Food Network, Chris!”

“Well, there’s just so many times you can play Boggle while on set. Sometimes you just want to watch something to take your mind off things you know?” He pushed his empty plate away, mirth in his voice. “Plus Chopped is psych! Scarlett, Sebastian and I place bets on our favorites. I usually leave a hundred dollars richer by the end of our marathons.”

..__..__..__..__..__

The Museum of Science was somewhat busy for a Monday since most schools in the city were already off for the Holidays, making Chris lower his cap to cover his eyes as they entered the building.

Lucy’s eyes got big when she took in the place. “Oh my god, this is incredible! It’s almost bigger than the Museum of Natural back in New York.”

“I believe New York has more exhibits but we have more square footage or something like that. They grow everything big in Mass.” He winked.

“Don’t I know it?” Lucy waggled her eyebrows, laughing before grabbing the map she had picked up at the entrance. “Alright, what’s the plan?”

“I got us tickets to the Lightning! show at two, the Planetarium at three thirty and the butterfly garden at five pm.” Chris held her hand and lead her to the right side of the building while pointing things up in the map she held. “Maybe we could start with the dinos and make our way back to the red wing for the show?”

“Let’s head downstairs and see the Triceratops exhibit then, they are my favorite.”

“So, you like then horny, uh?” Chris whispered in her ear while they descended the escalator.

“Horny and big boned.” She whispered back with a straight face, a sneaky hand landing on the fly of his pants. “Small boners just don’t do it for me.”

A mother cleared her throat behind them just as they reached the lower level, and they moved quickly out of the way, looking sheepishly at the woman giving them a death glare before bursting into giggles.

“You’re such a bad influence on me.” Chris tutted at Lucy, bringing her close to his side and putting an arm around her shoulders.

“ME?” she protested with a laugh. “I was merely stating the fact that I like big dinosaurs, like a triceratops or a brachiosaur.”

“I’ll show you a brachiosaur when we get home.” He winked at her.

“If I recall correctly, your brachiosaur has quite a thick neck. Can I pet it? Maybe kiss it a few times?” She teased him, rubbing his forearm in a suggestive manner.

“Are you trying to make me pop a boner in public woman?” she saw him discreetly adjusting himself. “Come on, let’s see those dinos.”

The exhibit was fantastic, three full skeletons held the main floor, including a small, unhorned hatchling that made Lucy tear up. They admired the displays, taking turns pointing something they liked and debating which dinosaur would in against various superheroes, in the end deciding Hulk would probably join the dinosaur side, just to even things out. When they got to the T-Rex exhibit, Chris joked about this being Dodger’s wet dream and that he the only reason he wouldn’t steal a bone to take home to Dodger was that it wouldn’t fit inside his house, prompting Lucy to ask about it.

“The whole main floor is gorgeous, but I looooove your kitchen, it’s freaking amazing. If I ever move, I want a huge kitchen just like yours!”

“It was the first room I renovate when I bought the house last year.” Chris beamed. “Every detail, from the island to the fixtures have a history or a special meaning. I installed the backsplash myself.”

“Wait, you did it yourself?” Lucy asked, wide-eyed.

“The backsplash yeah, but I’ve had a lot of help from Dix and Garret during the reno. I also stained the hardwood and installed the mantle over the fireplace.” Chris grinned proudly and pulled up his phone, opening the gallery app and showing Lucy the before pictures. “Dix’s a contractor, damn good one too. We hired a design to come up with a general idea of I wanted and went from there. We’ve finished all the main floor, the master bedroom, and bathroom plus the staircase, but the other three bedrooms, the guest bathroom, basement and the backyard are kind of a mess. We only work on the house when I’m not filming, so it’s going slow.”

They walked over to the entrance of the Theater of Electricity as it was almost time for the show to start, and sat on a backless wooden bench, away from the main area, Chris straddling the bench and Lucy facing him, one leg bent over the smooth surface.

“Chris, the fact that you decided to tackle your own renovations when you could just pay someone to do it for you is remarkable. It speaks volumes of what you are as a person and what you want in life. My dad always quotes, we shape our buildings: thereafter, they shape us. You’re turning that place into a reflection of what you want for you and it shows.”

Chris regarded her for a moment, wistful eyes scanning hers.

“My ma’ always told me something similar before I moved to Los Angeles: whatever good things we build, end up building us. I’ve been trying to live by it, surrounding myself with people that want to build each other up, who share their talents with others in the best way they can. It takes a while to weed out the bad, especially in a place that thrives in being fake. There are many good, hard-working people in L.A. but there are at least three times as fakers and clingers who just want to use you. I love my house there, but sometimes it feels less like a home and that’s especially true now that I’ve bought the condo here. Ma’ was ecstatic when I told her I had found a place here, granted she wanted me closer in Sudbury, but I reckon Boston is a heck of a lot closer than Los Angeles. She helped decorate the living room and the big ass island was more of her idea than mine, but in the end, I loved it.”

“She’s got an awesome taste; I have the biggest case of kitchen envy now. I absolutely adore my apartment, it isn’t small by the city standards, but it doesn’t have much kitchen space. It certainly doesn’t have a big ass island, but it’s home.” She shrugged.

“I remember Penny mentioning you guys are from somewhere upstate, when did you move to New York?”

Lucy shifted in her seat. She would not think about him and what made her move back home.

“Late 2002. I had just gotten back from England; I went through a rough patch for a while and I wanted to start fresh some place where I could lose myself and not worry about everyone from the neighbors to the Mayor knowing your name. So as soon as I could I packed again and moved to New York. My father was supportive, but my Mamma was livid, she didn’t speak to me for a whole month.” she saw the confusion on his face. “That might not sound like a lot, but my Mamma is originally from Trento, Italy. She embodies all the stereotypes of an Italian woman you can think of. Not talking to me was maybe harder on her than it was on me!”

“My mother is like a quarter Italian so I can relate a little when she gets going is you better shut up and listen because she means business.” Chris nodded. He looked her over and Lucy had the distinct feeling he was trying to pierce some of her story together. He was much more perceptive than she initially thought, there would be no glossing over details with him. “England, uh? For dancing school?”

“Yeah… I joined when I was sixteen. Did almost six years with the company.”

He looked impressed. “That’s a whole lot of time dancing. What was the school like?”

“Demanding. We had to be the best one hundred percent of the time, you could lose your spot if you ever slacked on grades or on your dancing. I had a private tutor for classes, so I had no free time until I was finished with their version of high school. Then I got promoted to first soloist when I was twenty, so I barely know any touristy spots in London.”

“I keep wondering why you don’t want to tell me that you actually danced for the Royal Ballet of London and not some random school.” Chris gave her a pointed look and Lucy’s eyes widened. “Your sister is your biggest fan you know? She might have mentioned you danced with them once… or twenty times.”

Lucy looked away, her face heating up. Penny had been so supportive back in the day, even at thirteen, she was Lucy’s most supportive family member, encouraging her older sister to apply to the scholarship, staying in during the weekends so they could practice together. The events that preceded her return to the States still stung Penny and Lucy never thought her sister would look over them to hype her up to her friends.

“I don’t know really, I feel like I’m bragging when I mention their name. And some people look at my body and think ‘yeah right’ because a ballerina is supposed to be always this dainty girl and I’m now the opposite of that.” She waved her hand in front of her body. “I got rather crafty with not saying exactly where I studied, they mostly assume it was just a regular dancing school.”

“People are assholes.” He conceded.

The theater doors opened before Chris could comment further and they were ushered inside after handing their tickets to the greeter. They chose a seat near the middle row, moving all the way to the last seats, Chris pulling his cap down and slumping a little in the seat while everyone got seated around them. When the lights diminished, he righted himself up, removing his hat and running a hand through his hair.

Chris brought her arm over her shoulder, drawing her closer. He leaned into her, whispering in her ear. “I’m sure you were the cutest ballerina ever, but I much prefer the upgraded version of you.”

Even if she had any cute comebacks, and she didn’t, lights went up on the stage and the presenter introduced Professor Lightning, who proceeded to show the audience how Tesla coils worked and how to create lightning strikes at the comfort of their own lab. That was the first of the many corny science jokes of the thirty-minute show and Lucy lost herself in it, along with Chris.

..__..__..__..__..

“Maybe they’ll get it ready before we die, can you imagine it? A holiday trip to Mars?” Chris was walking backward while talking to Lucy, hands waving around in excitement, and she thought he looked like a little kid dreaming about what he’d do when he got older. It was the cutest thing.

They had just left the planetarium wing and they decided to head back down to the Starbucks locates at the atrium for some coffee. Chris had fake gagged when she ordered a Caramel Brûlée Latte and she made a show of drinking it slowly, moaning and making faces to get back at him. He ordered three double espressos in a grande cup, making the barista blink and repeat the order back to him.

They were now sitting by one of the many tables overlooking the Charles River, and Chris was dreaming of spending weekends on Mars instead of down in the Bahamas.

“I guess if you had thirty million dollars you could do it.” She agreed just to appease him. She saw his smile get bigger, probably already deciding which investments he’d give up being in that voyage. “You know, for each leg of the trip.”

Chris dropped his shoulder, defeated. “Maybe I could just go to the moon then. A quick getaway to look at Earth from another perspective.”

He looked serious and Lucy had a feeling he was indeed planning for that excursion.

“Would you really do it?” She inquired with a tilt of her head.

“Hell yes, I’d do it in a heartbeat. I’d crap my pants while going up but man, that would be so fucking cool.”

Lucy watched as Chris got a dreamy look on his face and she contemplated if he would think she was crazy if she got him a Christmas gift. She just had the perfect idea for one.

“Send me a picture when you get there ok? You’d pay to go, I wouldn’t go even if they’d paid me.”

“Is it the heights?”

“Actually no, I love rollercoasters and I’ve bungee-jumped before.”

“You what?!” He stared at her with wide eyes.

“I did yeah! It’s such a cool experience, I’ll tell you about it sometime.”

“You better! So, if it isn’t heights, what is it?”

“I’m terrified of enclosed spaces. I can barely make out off an elevator without going into a mini panic attack.” Her body did a quick shake at thought of being inside a spaceship. “It’s not too much of being in a tight space but I need windows and I need to know I can quickly get out of the situation if the need arises. You can’t exactly do that while going to the moon.”

“I can see how that would pose a problem.” Chris nodded and finished his coffee. “How do you cope with flying?”

“I have a prescription for Xanax, but I try to avoid using it. I rely on lots and lots of distraction.” She picked her up her phone, unlocked and pulled up Spotify, showing him a playlist labeled Flying Sucks, and he scrolled through her picks. “I’m so glad I don’t need to turn off our phones anymore, I have my headphones on and music blaring from the moment I step into the plane.”

“I’m afraid to ask, but how does one go from Chopin to Slipknot in two songs?” He turned her phone back to her pointing from Nocturne op. 9 to Duality.

Lucy cocked her head at him, a grin on her face.

“My tastes are very singular,” she whispers trying to contain her laugh. “You wouldn’t understand.”

Chris paused for a bit and she saw the moment he got the joke.

“Did you… Did you just quote Fifty Shades Of Grey to me?” Chris was laughing so hard he dropped her phone on the table, his hand automatically landing on his chest. That was the third time she saw him doing that and vowed to try and make him laugh that hard again, it was the most adorable thing.

A few other visitors turned around startled by the sound of his laugh and Lucy shushed him, ineffectively. She saw a teenage girl squinting at Chris, trying to place the man sitting two tables away from her and Lucy immediately got up and stood in front of him, blocking her view.

“Let’s go, doofus, there’s a very curious teen staring at you and I say she’s seconds away from figuring it out who you are.” She gestured with a thumb to the table behind her. Lucy grabbed his hand and pulled him up, Chris lowering his cap while they left the cafeteria area.

“I still can’t believe you quoted that awful movie at me,” Chris said while tossing their cups on a nearby bin.

“And I don’t understand how you know that line at all.” She pointed at him, waggling her finger.

“They uh, may have offered me the role?” Chris glanced sheepishly at her.

“THEY WHAT?” Lucy shrieked and immediately covered her mouth. Chris pulled them into an empty alcove to get away from prying eyes. “I’m sorry for yelling but what?”

“They offered me the role. Twice. The second time they even threw veto power on whom would’ve play Anastacia.” He shook his head. “It was a hard pass from me. The sex scenes in the book were passable, but the plot felt iffy, very constricted and oversimplified.”

“You’re the first guy I know who actually have an opinion about the plot and do not dismiss it as being mommy porn.” Lucy praised him.

“I make a point of having an informed opinion and not rehash what others think.” Chris nodded. “If that means I have to read a book about kinky fuckery, hey, let’s do it!”

Lucy threw her head back with a laugh and they resumed their walk, discussing their favorite books and authors and soon it became very clear they did not share the same interests. Chris tended towards non-fiction, biographies, science and spirituality books while Lucy rarely picked up something that wasn’t about fantasy, especially vampires and wizards. They did agree on Harry Potter and A Brief History Of Time, so they called it a win anyway.

They circled back to the blue wing where the Butterfly Garden was located when a voice over the intercom announced that everyone with tickets for the five pm showing was now welcomed to enter the Garden, and they quickly made their way there.

They started the tour on the opposite side of the entrance, walking around a path brimming with the colorful wings of the kaleidoscope who lived there. Lucy took pictures of her favorites and marveled at how nature worked, turning into what most would consider an ugly nuisance into such an exquisite animal.

The thick, lush foliage extended all the way to the glass ceiling, the various shades of green a great contrast against the gray skies above. Each section of the garden filled with different types of flowers and plants to attract the butterflies, it was a cacophony of plants from all over the world, turning the area into something quite magical in Lucy’s eyes.

Chris stopped here and there to discuss whatever butterfly they could see, Chris pointing what he remembered of his previous visit and telling Lucy anecdotes of his time there with his family.

“Then he convinced Shanna to lick the picture! So she goes up, takes the mounted frame from the wall and low and behold, licked the fucking leaf!” Chris remembered laughing. “Of course, the moment she lifted the frame a silent alarm must’ve sounded somewhere, and two guards appeared out of thin air… and that’s how the Evans Family got banned from the MOS for six months.”

Lucy wheezed as she laughed, trying to control her breathing. “Poor Shanna! You and your brother were not kind with your sisters uh?”

“We’re vicious sometimes.” He agreed. “But we’re also very protective, I got in trouble once because I bit a guy for pushing Carly off the swing set. Granted I was six at the time, but man, I drew blood and everything! Dad had to pay for his hospital visit and I lost dessert rights for a month.”

He pouted, making Lucy giggle.

“Your family sounds amazing Chris! Are you guys doing something special for Christmas?”

“Mom’s hosting a huge party this year, so the whole family will be there. Lots of Evans and Capuanos, plenty of food and booze, games, I live for those parties, they are my favorite, so much love going on. Big breakfast in the morning, let them go crazy opening presents, then we take the kids sledding or to ice skate on a pond nearby and then we all gather to the party. How about you?”

“That sounds lovely. It’s just the immediate family this Christmas for us. Mamma insists on having all her kids there at least every other year, it’s a deal she makes with all in-laws when they become family.” She paused. Lucy was the only one who had never taken a boyfriend to one of their gatherings. She had mastered the art of ignoring the looks of pity her family sent her way every time she arrived alone, dodging questions about her failed love life now second nature. “We don’t have many relatives in America, mamma being Italian and Dad from Scotland, so we kinda created our own family traditions; we decorate cookies on the 24th, mamma chooses the Yule log, and we sit around talking about our year while listening to the Beatles and drinking wine. Then on Christmas Day we go ice skating, hold the ‘Annual Seabrook Snowman Challenge’, which I suck at by the way, and consume way too much wine and crostoli.”

“I love crostoli, my mom never got the recipe right from her grandma so hers it’s not so great… But I’ll deny it to my grave if you ever tell her I said that.” He tapped the end of her nose, making her giggle. “It’s been such a long time since I had them though.”

“Mom makes a ton of them to give the neighbors as gifts, I’ll save you some and send them back with Penny.”

“That’d be awesome, thank you.” He ran a hand through her hair and brought her closer, intending to kiss her. His lips almost touch her when a group of kids no older than six-year-old breezes by them, screaming ewwww and making kissing noises. “I guess you got cooties.”

They giggle and separate, but he clasps her hand while they toured the winding paths.

Walking further into the garden they got to a small section where hundreds of white or blue butterflies floated over the flowers, enjoying a rare ray of sun that filtered from the glass ceiling above. Chris took his phone out from his front pocket and handed it over to Lucy before embracing her, arms closing around her front and pulling her closer, her back molded to his front. She shivered at the full body contact and had trouble opening the camera app. Searching for the best angle, she took a couple of pictures of them surrounded by the clouds of wings, including one where a blue butterfly sat on Chris’ shoulders and Lucy had a surprised look on her face, which quickly become their favorite.

“Ladies and gentlemen, the museum will close in ten minutes.”

The voice over the intercom made them both jump, and Chris looked at the clock.

“Wow, it’s almost six already?” He looked surprised.

“Are you serious?” Lucy couldn’t believe how fast the day had gone by.

Yesterday had been amazing, all the teasing leading to a frenzied and amazing night of sex but if she had to choose her favorite time with Chris had been today. There were no awkward moments, not long silences where they didn’t know what to say to each other. As much as she was pressed not call it a date at the beginning, there was no denying today had been exactly that. And she loved every second of it.

Now came the hard part, letting go of Chris and going back to her own life.

“At least it’s not snowing yet, roads should be clear.” He talked absently. Chris scratched his beard appearing to miles away from the museum already and Lucy tried not to let it bother her.

The escalator had a line and the elevator was for seniors, pregnant women and people in need of assistance, so they took the stairs, keeping closer to the wall as to not draw much attention.

He picked up her left hand, drawing patterns on her palm before twisting their fingers together while they descended the stairs to get to the garage. Lucy noticed how touch drove he had been the entire day, always reaching out to her, holding her hand while they walked, circling her waist while they waited in line for tickets. It occurred to her he would distance himself from her while they were in public and she understood why he would do it but in a deeper level, she was elated when he didn’t. She thought back to that morning’s conversation; I won’t shy away from someone I care about’, and her heart skipped a beat. Could he care about her in a more permanent way than a one-night stand? She shook her head. No, that wasn’t possible, right?

Then how you would explain your own feelings? Her heart had terrible timing, as always. Okay, so maybe today had been better than good. I was a fucking great day okay, could you at least own up to that? And Lucy couldn’t argue because it really had been that.

At least she’d had the memories of their time together, the last thirty hours had been incredible, and she knew a smile would always accompany those memories, no matter what happened from now on.

They got to the garage after a few minutes, people shuffling around them to get to their cars as quickly as possible. They walked fast, not bothering with their coats, just wanting to get inside his car. Lucy was really looking forward to sliding against the heated leather seats.

“Fuck, it’s cold!” Chris exclaimed pulling her along. His wide stride made her almost run after him, air leaving her mouth in smalls white clouds as she breathed out. He hit his key fob a few meters before they reached the car and engine came to life with a hum. He opened the door for her, and she placed a sweet kiss on his cheek before getting inside. Chris quickly went around to the driver’s seat and moaned when the heated air hit his skin. “Oh, much better.”

“Do you think Audi would sell me just one of these seats? The heating at the studios sucks, I’d love to have one of these for my office!” She wriggled happily in her seat.

“Or you could buy a proper office chair that does the same thing?” He pointed at her when he got behind the wheel. Soft jazz music filled the air around them when he turned the key, the melodic sound swirling around them.

“Uhm I could, but then I couldn’t tell people how I convinced fucking Audi to make me a custom chair. Now that’s a story.” She chuckled and turned on her seat, facing him.

“So buy a chair, slap an Audi sticker to the back of it and tell the story anyway, how ‘bout that?”

“Uhm… There’s an idea.”

He laughed. “Why are we discussing this particular one anyway?”

“’ Cuz there’s like a hundred cars trying to leave at the same time and we’re stalling?”

“Such a smart girl.” Chris reached over the console and picked up her hand, playing with her rings. “Are you hungry?”

“Not really.”

He nodded and concentrated on the traffic inside the garage, managing to get out and merge into the exit lane, all with one hand, the other still holding hers.

Why in the world did she say she wasn’t hungry when he asked? She wasn’t, that was true, but they could have gone somewhere to just talk, she could have a few more moments with him and now she blew it. God, she was stupid. She thumped her head in the back seat, cursing herself. Was it too late to say something, hey, changed my mind, let’s go grab a pizza or something.

She kept her body turned to him as he drove, a leg bent on the seat, studying his profile, the little bump on his nose, the mole on his left cheek, how his beard was not dark blond but auburn like Penny’s hair. She wanted to commit it all to memory so she could relive it once she got back home. Maybe daydream about not being a fucking coward and ask him to take her back to his place instead of back to Garrets.

They drove in silence for the next ten minutes, the only sounds inside the car coming from the speakers. He pulled to the curb of Garret’s house and Chris killed the engine, turning to Lucy. She felt the intensity of his gaze while she studied his face, waiting for his final words. This was it. He would thank her for a good time, say she was a nice girl and send her away.

Was it even possible to have feelings for someone you’d met in person just the day before? Maybe it was just some leftover infatuation from the night before? Sure, she had heard of him from Garret and Penny, they were practically his personal cheerleader squad, but meeting Chris had been a whole different experience. She couldn’t remember the last time she’s had so much fun with a man. It wasn’t just the sex, which by the way had blown her mind after twenty plus months of celibacy, but how he’d made her feel like the most important person in the world when he talked to her, how he listened with his whole body, really paying attention to what she was talking about. How he laughed at her jokes, cracking up with that adorable and dorkable laugh of his. He had cut through her walls and her fears with his witty banter and a charming personality and she had been impotent to resist him. She liked everything about him. She was falling for the guy.

No.

She had already fallen.

The realization hit her like a ton of bricks.

Stupid, silly girl. Why on earth would someone like him ever want more than a one-time thing with the likes of her?

She screamed at that poisonous voice to shut up, she didn’t want to hear it today. She concentrated on the affirmations Doctor Clark had given her.

She was worth it; she was not perfect but every being deserved love.

She was happy with her body; maybe she wasn’t a size four or even a six, but she was stylish, some days she would be so bold as to call herself sexy.

She was a good person; a loving friend, a kind person, a passionate lover,

She was deserving of love.

She closed her eyes, exhaling slowly, willing away all bad thoughts, breathing in and out, centering herself.

Maybe not his love, but he had awakened something inside her, if Captain America himself thought she was worthy of his time, that voice surely must be wrong.

“Lucy?”

She opened her eyes and leaned forward, resting her hand on his knee.

“Thank you for an amazing time, Chris. I haven’t had this much fun in quite a few years.”

She kissed his cheek, lingering just one second more. Unbuckling her seatbelt, she moved to open the door.

“What, no, Lucy wait.” He hit the lock button, breathing rapidly. “Just wait, give a man a moment to breathe, will ya’?”

“Chris?” She tilted her head, watching as he took deep breathes, counting on his fingers while murmuring what looked like affirmations, much the same she did earlier.

“Sorry, I had to run a few scenarios in my head. A trick my therapist taught me for when I get anxious.” He explained, tangling the fingers of one of their hands and pulling her to him, kissing her square in the mouth. “None of that cheek kissing thing alright?” he pleaded when he released her.

“Alright?” she had no idea what to answer so she nodded instead.

“Good, good. We had a great day together, didn’t we?” his free hand reached for a stray lock of her hair, twirling it between his fingers.

“I believe I thanked you for it already.” She looked nonplussed at him.

“That you did baby.” He kissed her again, this time biting her lower lip. “What if this wasn’t the end of that time?”

“Chris?”

“What if instead of dropping you here, you get out, get your bags and go home with me?” his clears eyes shone with hope and he licked his lips, waiting.

“You know we leave after lunch, right, I told you that.” Her heart was speeding up and she was sure he could feel her hands getting clammy. Was he really asking her to spend the night again?

“That would give us more,” he checked his watch, “eighteen more hours together.”

“Are you sure Chris? I’m okay with this being the end of our little rendezvous, I really liked the day we had.” She regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth.

His smile vanished.

“Oh, unless you don’t want to, I can understand that.” He chewed on his lip, defeated.

“Unlock the door, Chris.”

“Okay.” He hit the button and bowed his head. “Can I… can I kiss you goodnight?”

“Yes, you can kiss me goodnight.” She opened the door but didn’t move, waiting for him to look up. “You can kiss me goodnight after I have my wicked way with you after we get back to your place.”

“Seriously?”

“Yes! I was beating myself up for not saying yes when you asked if I was hungry.”

His face broke up in a huge grin.

“We can eat, then go back home.”

“I just want to spend more time with you, I don’t care what we do.”

His lips were cold when she kissed him, the outside air rapidly entering the car, but neither cared, too lost in each other to bother closing the door.

“I’ll go grab my bags.” She said when they separated.

“Hurry up woman, we have just nineteen hours and fifty-five minutes left.”

She threw her head back and laughed, getting out of the car and running up the stairs.

“Hey Lucy?” he yelled from the lowered window. She turned to him, after knocking on Garret’s door. “I hope you don’t have plans to sleep tonight.”

[pinkykitten]

The Maze

Thomas x Taylor 

Warning: death, violence, cursing, spoilers (if u have not seen the movie dont read this)

Specifics: angst, fluff, romance, comedy, gifs, pics, aesthetics, oc, oc story, plus size, 600 followers competition 

People: too many to put down srry 

Words: 15,987 (omg this is the longest thing ive ever written in my life)

Requested: By @fyeahtaylorp (cannot tag) Ok so My OC’s name is Taylor she’s 5,5, plus size, blonde hair, blue eyes, and she’s sassy and confident most of the time. I was thinking maybe rebel Wilson as the actress she resembles. I want her to be with Thomas from the maze runner. I was thinking that they meet in the maze and she’s been there longer than him and they start as friends but when they escape the maze they grow closer especially after she’s taken away from the group when they get to wicked. Maybe she’s scared Thomas is into Teresa or Brenda but he’s is in love with her and she finds that out when he thinks something has happened to her and idk how to end it 😅😂

Authors Note: FINALLY IM ABOUT TO POST THIS AGHGHGHGHGH i am so srry this took so long ive been stressed lately and dealing with some personal issues but omg im so happy how this came out! i hope u guys like it as well and also its super long lol im srry. couple of things, i did not re read this cuz its too much so if there r mistakes then u know im not surprised. also i made my mind that i am not doing this every 100 more followers i get instead its every 300 more followers i get so next time i do a oc competition story will be when i reach 900 followers or if i lol thank u guys for the follow and i am totally getting back to writing i have a lot of things coming up that im excited for yay! hope u enjoy and thank u for requesting! 

previous oc story for my 500 followers: Erik Killmonger x oc Calantha Morrison 

“Stephen, Stephen...I need you. I’m scared.”

With a fright she woke up. Not understanding if her thoughts in her head while she slept were a dream or a reality. Everything she had just played in her mind was like a memory, it was as if Taylor lived through them.

She saw the sun beginning to rise, this was a sign to show her it was the start of the day. Her life seemed to be endless, it seemed to have no meaning. Everyday was unknown, unknown of where she came from or anything before the maze. She was stuck with many, many other young boys around her age, and some younger. It was unfair she felt to her and to the others.

“Where did I come from?” Taylor would ask herself from time to time, really pondering on that question.

As Taylor got up to start the day she got dressed in her ripped jeans and her long sleeve shirt, wearing her boots with it. “Time to begin the day.” She breathed out into the cool air but then she felt her most prized possession. Without even realizing she lifted her hand to touch her necklace. When she first arrived at the maze she was left with the necklace. It must mean something, but if only she knew what it meant, or who gave it to her? What did it signify?

“Hey Newt, hope you slept well,” Taylor smiled as she met with Newt for breakfast her stomach rumbling at the smell of Frypan’s food.

Newt chuckled, patting her arm as the walked to the others, “someone sounds hungry-

Taylor playfully hit his arm, “what’s that supposed to mean?

Newts face went pale as he thought that he had hurt Taylor’s feelings, “oh my, I’m sorry Tay.” She just laughed, “you’re fine Newt. But a girl’s gotta eat!”

Newt laughed at her statement and flung his arm over her shoulders, patting her soft arm in the process. They both walk to the breakfast area. Taylor sniffs the air and motions her way to the food. 

Taylor wiped her mouth as she stood up, enjoying her breakfast especially since she spent it with her friends. It was tough being the only girl in the Glade. Nobody there understood her, they tried to but it was difficult. It was just biology, she was a female and they, they were inexperienced boys. 

As Taylor’s boots trudged through the high, green grass she looked at the huge stone cold walls. The maze it what made everything in life seem impossible. Taylor stared at it, maybe if she stared at it long enough it would go away, but sure enough the concrete barriers were still there, almost seeming to laugh at her. 

“Hey you okay Tay?” Newt asked, concerned as he placed his hand on her shoulder. A smile growing on his lips. 

Taylor nodded and laughed, “yeah I was just thinking thats all. So these tulips, they are very beautiful.” Your hands landed on the flowers of Newt’s garden. The petals were soft and the scent was so pleasing. “Good job Newt, these are gorgeous!”

“Well, you helped me out with them, remember?”

Taylor chuckled, “yeah, I do.” She went to start by getting more suitable dirt for the produce and started taking out any weeds. Then watering them and adding food. 

As Taylor was about to replant some items she heard a lot of commotion coming from, “the box...”

Taylor sprinted to the elevator. All the boys were making a commotion. She squeezed through them and saw...him. Her heart started to beat fast as his light brown eyes met hers. Her blue ocean eyes widened when she saw him. She felt like she had met this boy before but she didn’t know where or how. When the boy’s face lands on her he seems to take a pause and as if inspect her. Gally takes him out of the box and they all corner him, not giving the newcomer space. 

“Hey guys give him some space!” Taylor shouted at the other boys, pushing them away from the newbie. Just then the newcomer makes a run for it. 

“We got a runner!” One of the kid yells. 

Taylor mentally slaps herself at how the others treated the new one. As the new boy falls and trips on the grass, Taylor motions to him. 

“Hello new one, I’m Taylor.” She stuck out her hand, a smile on her face. “Welcome home.”

Taylor and Newt show the ropes to the new kid, him still not remembering his name which she told him he will later on remember but his past will be always forgotten. She explained how everyone in the Glade has a job. “Alby, our leader, was the first one here, but we all have jobs here. Newt likes to garden.”

“And what do you do?” The boy asked, really interested in Taylor. 

Taylor put her hands on her hip all sassy, “well me-”

“Oh no here we go,” Newt laughed, knowing Taylor was about to make a speech of how important and how amazing her job is. 

“I’m a map maker. We have our runners who run the maze and every time they finish the maze they come to me! They tell me whats changed and what to add more. Its a team work and yes Newt to me it is one of the most important jobs. Just saying!”

As Taylor said this the runner came out of the Maze before it closed. 

With Newt’s permission Taylor shows the boy all the different areas and just a little bit about everything of his new home. 

They two sit on a log by the fire with the rest of the kids. Taylor hands the boy a drink to which he thinks taste bad. 

“So out there,” the boy points to the maze. “What happens out there?”

Taylor knew what horrible monster crawled those wall but she did not want to scare the new one, “I don’t really know, remember I’m no runner and for good reason. I could never run all that, I’m too slow.”

The boy laughs, “does anyone stay the night in the maze?”

Taylor shakes her head, her golden blonde hair also moving with her, “no, they wouldn’t survive. I don’t think, but any ways this is your first day here. Lets not worry about those things and instead worry about you having some fun tonight.” She saw the boy was not having it and was not wanting to have fun. With a sigh she sat firmly next to him. “Do you see those stars?”

The boy looks to the black sky, “there are millions of stars.”

“Yeah but these are yours.” She grabbed the boy’s hand and lead him to a bright twinkling star. “I can see that you are going to do just fine here. In fact many will trust, respect, and one will truly love you forever. Your time here will be something of learning and teaching to everyone.”

The boy nodded with surprise, “you got that all from that star, or are you just trying to make me feel better?”

“The stars never lie Greenie.” She puts her hand out to him as he takes it. They stand up to talk somewhere more private but as they do Gally throws a guy to the boy. 

They both start competing. “Okay Gally thats enough, he’s new here!” Taylor shouts to him over the other boys screaming and cheering. As she thought that the newbie would not win he pushes Gally to the floor. Everyone including Taylor cheers for the boy, but Gally kicks him making the greenie fall on his head. 

“My name is Thomas.” The boy stands up screaming with pure joy. “My name is Thomas, its Thomas!”

“Hooray for Thomas,” Taylor exclaims, slapping a hand on Thomas’s shoulder. The crowd goes wild for him. 

“Welcome home Thomas,” Alby says as he hand him a drink. 

The next day was hectic. One of the runners named Ben was stung by a griever and he attacked Thomas. Taylor heard the commotion and helped Newt hit Ben on the head with a shovel. Then Alby told the boys to lift Ben’s shirt. Seeing the stung made Taylor’s heart ache, she can see the pain and sadness of knowing in Ben’s eyes. She left with tears in her eyes. 

Taylor, Chuck and Alby all sat Thomas down to explain what had happened, to explain the nightmares that lay beyond those walls. 

She knew what was to happen the next day though. Ben is forced to enter into the maze and left their to die. There is no cure for the stung. Seeing this made Taylor cry, hating the outcome of life. 

Later on, Minho who is the lead runner and Alby go in the maze to retrace Ben’s steps. 

As Taylor awaited for them she spent the time with Thomas. Her hands were sweaty and she was nervous for them. Thomas made her feel safe and better. 

“I’m scared Thomas. I wish Ben’s life would not have ended that way, I hate when this happens.”

Thomas grabbed her hand and reassuringly rubbed his thumb over her knuckles. The action made Taylor blush and feel some sort of attraction to the newbie. “Every things gonna be fine Tay, remember the stars.” He smiled to her as he moved a piece of stray hair behind her ear. 

Taylor held onto Thomas’s hand and onto her necklace, just awaiting for the others. 

Finally at dusk Taylor and the others wait my the entrance of the maze. The doors have opened but there is no Minho or Alby. Taylor’s heart starts to pound, fast. She is frightened and scared. With her left hand to her lips she quickly searches for Thomas’s hand, her right soft one clasping his calloused hand.

“Why are they taking so long.” She whispered under her breath, clutching onto Thomas hand harder. 

“C’mon guys can’t we send someone after them?” Thomas asked, already looking worried. 

Gally squatting by the floor says, “that’s against the rules.”

Taylor rolls her eyes and massages her temple. 

“Either they make it back or they don’t.”

Newt looks at Taylor and Thomas, “can’t risk loosing anyone else.”

Suddenly, a huge gust of wind blows at the group awaiting. Taylor puts her arm up to shield herself from the particles in the wind. 

Then the maze gears start to turn and the maze walls start closing slowly. 

“Oh no,” Chuck whispers. 

“No please no,” Taylor starts to panic. Seeing the door start to close. 

“There,” points Thomas. 

In the distance of the maze Minho is carrying Alby, it seems as if he is hurt. 

“Oh my god look there right there,” Taylor shouts, feeling happy that she sees them, but they are so far away. 

“Wait something is wrong,” Newt points out. 

“Oh no,” Taylor says worried. 

“C’mon Minho you can do it!” Shouts Chuck. 

The rest of the boys start to cheer for Minho, Gally saying for Minho to leave Alby there. 

“C’mon Minho, hurry Minho! You can do this!” Taylor screams as loud as she can. Her heart racing every second that goes by. 

“They’re not gonna make it,” Newt and Taylor realize. 

“They’re too far away,” Taylor cries, tears going down her face. 

The maze walls getting close to shutting fully Taylor is at this point gripping Thomas arm so hard. 

Minho screams as he tries to drag Alby to the entrance of the maze, going as fast as he can. 

“He’s not gonna make it,” Taylor whispers. Every one is screaming, shouting, trying to push Minho to go faster. She looks around to all the scared faces, all the faces that seem to have hope. Taylor looks in front, feeling helpless as she cries more. 

Thomas realizes what must be done and without a second thought he runs ahead with only a few inches left until the maze closes. 

“NO THOMAS!” Taylor screams in a high pitched scream as she tries to grab Thomas. 

Everything else was like a flash before her eyes. Her Thomas was gone. 

“NO!!!!”

The door to the maze fully closed and Taylor fell onto the dirt, crying, knowing Thomas, Minho, and Alby were already gone. 

“No Thomas, why?” She cried as she wrapped herself in her sweater, wanting to feel his hand once again. 

She waited there all night, wrapping herself tighter in her sweater, clutching onto the necklace. 

“Taylor, you can’t stay here all night.” Newt said as he sat beside her, looking up the maze. 

“Yes I can and I will. Did you see what Thomas did Newt? He risked his life,” she stood up and placed her delicate cold hands on the stone wall. “He is  a hero, Newt. He’s probably scared, I just,” she gave a big sigh. “I just want him to be safe. He was one of the good ones, I saw it.”

Newt nodded his head and stayed with Taylor for as long as he could, when it was time to go to sleep he left Taylor with her thoughts. Taylor traced over the names of those who had passed away. Scolding herself for thinking that the name Thomas would be carved there. “C’mon Thomas, you gotta make it. You just gotta.”

When morning came Taylor was the first one waiting there for them. Her feet tapped subconsciously on the dirt floor. 

The door of the maze opened up and Taylor, Chuck, Newt and some others were there as well. Taylor held onto Chuck’s hand and he hugged her, trying to reassure here. 

“I’m here for you Taylor,” Chuck said.

“Thanks Chuck.” Chuck was like a little brother to Taylor. He was such a happy boy and just so kind it made her feel thankful to know him. 

Taylor and Chuck were so hopeful, just wanting to see the others there at the entrance of the maze. 

But nobody was there. 

“Told you guy,” Newt started. “they’re not coming back.”

Every one was starting to loose faith as they walked away, preceding with their life. Not Taylor though and Chuck. They stood and waited. 

Taylor looked down, starting to also loose faith as she didn’t see them coming. 

“No way,” said a boy as Taylor lifted her head she saw...

them. 

“Yeah!” Cheered Chuck. 

“Oh my god, yes! Yes!” She started to squeal. Taylor was overjoyed and so happy to see them. 

Thomas and Minho both worked together in saving Alby. They made it through the doors and laid Alby on the floor. 

Taylor’s eyes started to become glassy, they were starting to tear up at the sight before her. 

“You saw a griever?” Chuck asked, looking at Minho and Thomas. 

“Yeah I saw one.” Thomas said, out of breath. 

Minho shook his head, “he didn’t just see it, he killed it.”

The whole group looked at Thomas, shocked. Taylor smirked and hugged Thomas, “I knew there was something special about you.”

Thomas chuckled and hugged Taylor back. 

They arrive back to the hut where they all sit down and discuss what has changed within the maze. 

“This is where the magic happens,” Taylor whispered to Thomas as she gave him a wink. As they walked in there laid the map. It was unlike any other map. It was not made out of paper, no, it was made out of sticks, rocks. It showed where turns were made, how abstract the maze truly was. 

“Wow, this is what you guys do?” Thomas asked, mesmerized by how Taylor and her team had built the maze replica. 

“Yeah, now you’re a part of it.” Taylor bit her lip, trying to hold in her immense smile knowing now she gets to spend moments with Thomas. 

Thomas looks up at Taylor and grins at her, “well first off we went through here.”

Thomas and Minho sat in front of Taylor, telling her every little detail on how the maze has changed. They place the rock that they had written each section of the place and put it in its proper area.

Thomas peers around the room which makes Taylor uncomfortable. The room is dark, dull, it smells of copper, so much that someone could taste it. Taylor was the same way when she peered into the map making room, to her it was a bit scary, but if it was going to save the lives of all these kids, she would sacrifice her nose smell for a little bit. 

As Taylor listens to Minho’s route she stares intently at one piece, “hey maybe this is a pattern?”

The group discussed all night, for many hours. Words exchanging, ideas, thoughts, it was a long, long night. 

The next day as Taylor is tending to the garden she hears the unusual sound. The creaking of the box. 

“Guys! Guys come check this out!” She shouts as she runs to the elevator. The others arrive as well and the person that is shown shocks every one. 

“What in the world?” Some ask as they stare at this...

“Its a girl...,” Taylor crawls in the box as she stares at another girl. She’s not just the only girl anymore. A part of her feels happy and glad but another part of her feels, jealous. She did not understand why.

Newt jumps in as well, “yeah you’re right Tay...its another girl.”

They all stare in amazement and curiosity. Why would they be sent another girl? 

“Whats in her hand?” Gally asks. Newt takes out the paper in her hand and written on the small piece it says, ‘shes the last one ever’. Taylor’s face looks confused, what could this mean?

“What the hel* does that mean?” Newt looks up at Taylor. 

The new girl suddenly wakes up with a gasp, her breathing very hard. As she is struggling to regain her breath she utters only one name, “Thomas...”

The boys and Taylor look at Thomas, expecting him to know why this new girl said his name. He gave a look back of unknowing. 

As the three, Taylor, Thomas, and Minho discuss more about the maze in the map room some boys come around to the entrance. 

““What are you guys doing? You’re not allowed here,” Taylor tries to shoo them off but they stand their ground. “But its the girl.”

“What is she awake?” Thomas questions. 

The two boys look at each other then at Taylor’s group, “yeah well, you can say that.”

As Taylor runs to where the new girl is at Chuck chuckles and points up, “Girls are awesome.”

Taylor shoots him a face of annoyance, “really shank? Now you realize that?” She looks up to see the newbie throwing rocks at the boys down below. “Are you serious?” 

The boys have shields and are trying to diffuse the situation. 

“We just want to talk,” intervenes Thomas, but still the new girl keeps throwing rocks. 

“Let me handle this,” Taylor says as she stand in front of the boys. “Hello there fellow girl. How bout me and you talk? Just us girls only, hmm?”

The girl pauses with the rocks for a moment and that lets Taylor go up. 

As she climbs up she sees the girl there, huddled probably scared. 

“Hi there,” Taylor greets her with a smile. “Don’t worry none of the boys are coming up.”

“You’re a girl?” The new one asks, looking at Taylor up and down. 

Taylor nods, “yeah, I’m the first girl. Its nice to see another one, lets me have closure. Knowing I can relate to you.”

“How come I can’t remember anything?”

“Don’t worry, that happens to us all. I don’t remember anything, my past, memories, they are all gone. All I have is this to remind me that I did have a past.” Taylor pulls up her necklace for the new girl to see it. 

“Its beautiful.”

“Thanks, now you might remember your name a few hours from now or the next day.”

“My name is Teresa.”

Taylor is shocked a little. The new girl remember’s her name already. Something was way off about this Greenie. “Well Teresa my name is Taylor, nice to meet you.”

Behind Taylor climbs a Thomas. Teresa quickly pulls out a machete and points it at him. 

“Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, easy alright?”

“Yeah its okay Teresa, he’s one of the good guys,” Taylor smiles at Thomas. Thomas gives a little grin to Taylor at the comment she said. 

“So your name is Teresa?” Thomas asks as he settles next to Taylor. Teresa nods while Thomas introduces himself. “Teresa, I’m Thomas. But you already knew that, I guess, huh?”

Teresa still pointing the blade at Thomas looks to Taylor, “they said I kept saying his name in my sleep.” She turns to look at Thomas, “who are you?”

“He doesn’t know either,” Taylor says. “No one here remembers anything. We are just like you.”

Thomas places his hand on Taylor lap, “yeah, shes right. We all woke up in that box just like you. We are all the same. So I’m gonna take this.” Thomas takes the machete out of Teresa’s hand and gives it to Taylor. “Okay.”

Taylor let out the breath she had been holding. Taylor and Thomas stood by with Teresa, to make sure she felt safe. But there were so many questions that needed answering. 

Thomas, Minho, Winston, Zart and Frypan enter into the maze. Taylor says her goodbyes to them but as Thomas is about to leave Taylor meets with him. 

“I wanted to give you something before you go.” Taylor hands Thomas a sheet of paper, on the paper is drawn a butterfly on a flower. It looks so realistic and it is shaded nicely. “Its a little something so you remember me in there.”

Thomas smiles and brings Taylor into a long, tight hug. “I’m gonna miss you,” he murmurs in her ear. 

Taylor does not want to let go. She wants to keep holding onto him forever, “Please be careful out there. Please come back to me.” She cradles his face with her hands giving him a painful goodbye. He lets go and enters in the maze with the rest of the boys. 

When they return Gally states that Thomas has jepordized the peaceful relationship between the Gladers and the Grievers. 

“Really Gally? Just because they found that device inside one? Maybe that could be a way out!” Taylor tried to reason with him. But it was no use. Gally wanted him punished. 

“Wait a second, why don’t we just make Thomas a runner?” Newt suggested patting Taylor’s back knowing she would back him up on this idea. 

“That’s a great idea, second-in-command.” She expressed and put more emphasize on second-in-command to show he was high in social level. “Thomas would make a great runner.”

So it was made, Thomas ended up being designated as a runner. 

Minho guides Thomas to the maze Taylor built again. Now its more important than ever to really pay attention to the model since the boys found some new clues. 

“Three years,” Taylor says as she walks around the table where the model is being displayed. “Three years of exploration and finally now, now that you Thomas are making a difference, we are actually getting somewhere.”

Thomas places his hand on Taylor’s waist making Taylor blush. Minho spots the attraction between them and gives a smirk. He coughs and raises his brow, “...well then, along with what Taylor said the Maze’s numbered sections open and close in a regular sequence, that might be a code.”

Taylor peers at the device and then at the model of the maze. “Yeah, look. The device is numbered to correspond to a certain section within the maze. With this device we may be able to actually escape!”

This was good new to every one. Finally, a chance to escape, finally a chance to see the other world. That hope that Taylor longed for just seemed so out of reach mere seconds ago, yet when she says the plan it seems as if now it is lightly grazing her fingertips. Like she can feel it.

Taylor walks in on Teresa with two syringes. Taylor gave a face of curiosity. She did not know what liquid was in those shots and yet before Taylor could ask, Teresa already stuck it into Alby. 

“What did you do to him?” Taylor raised her fists to Teresa but she just put her hands up in defense. 

“Its okay Taylor!...Its okay. This is gonna help him.”

Taylor side eyed Teresa, “How do I know you’re not lying, hmm?”

Teresa shrugged, “you’re just gonna have to trust me.”

Taylor angry leaves the hut that Alby is in and goes into the woods to read and draw, trying to block out her. Taylor was not one to feel self-conscious, or jealous but when she saw Teresa she felt those evil things. When she saw Teresa with Thomas the anger boiled more within her. Taylor knew in her head that Teresa and Thomas must have had history together so Taylor knew she did not have a chance, and the thin girl always wins. 

That day Thomas and Minho again went into the Maze. When they came back Thomas was oddly happy to see Taylor. 

Thomas ran up to her and gave her a big hug. 

“Whats this for?” Taylor chuckles, deepening the hug. 

“Tay,” Thomas puts his hands on her cheeks, it looks as if he is about to kiss her. “We may have found a way to get out of here, to get out of this maze. Wouldn't you like that?”

Taylor smiles, “I would love that Thomas.” She then laces her fingers with his wanting to show him that she does care and that he does matter. Thomas looks at the two hands together and starts coming in closer to Taylor but then Gally interrupts and starts to have an argument with Thomas. The argument is cut short when Teresa says that Alby’s awake. Feeling relief Taylor makes her way over to his hut to see how he is doing. 

“Has he said anything?” Minho asks, worry clearly evident in his voice. 

“No,” Teresa answers. 

“Alby, Alby you alright?” Newt asks, looking into Alby’s eyes as he rests next to him on his bed.

“Lets not over crowd him guys. I don’t want to scare him or makes him feel uncomfortable.” Taylor says, standing next to Thomas and squatting to get a good eyes level with Alby. 

“Hey Alby,” Thomas said as he squats next to Taylor. “We might of just found a way out of the maze. You hear me, we could be gettin out of here.”

Alby then whispers the next two words, tears falling down his face. “We can’t...we can’t leave. They won’t let us.”

“What are you talking about?” Thomas asks, uncertain. 

“I remember,” Alby says, making Taylor gasp. 

“What do you remember?” Thomas questions Alby. 

“You.”

“Thomas, what is he talking about?” Taylor’s eyes searching for an answer as she looks to Thomas. 

“And you...Taylor. You two were always their favorites. Always.”

Taylor’s heart started to beat at an uncontrollable rate. She felt unable to breathe. Alby knew something of her past that she doesn’t even know. Did she know Thomas before the maze? Her head was starting to spin, her whole life seemed like a mystery to her. 

“Why did you do this?” Alby’s tears came out more as he stared at Taylor and Thomas. “Why did you two come here?”

There is a lot of commotion outside the tent. The whole group goes outside to see what all the ruckus is when they are met with something of their nightmares. 

That night the maze entrance does not close leaving the Grievers to pour into the glade. It was a war between the Gladers and the monsters. Every one who knew Taylor knew about her fears. One of her fears was spiders, and to her these Grievers looked like gigantic, scary, spiders. Taylor and the rest of the gang tried their hardest to fight against the demons but some won. Some of your group including Zart and the beloved Alby passed due to the fighting. It was a struggle to fight and to try to win. Taylor kept close to Thomas, making sure he was safe before her in any of this. 

As the fight finished Taylor looked around her. The home she knew all these years was broken, it was devastating. All their produce was gone, everything was up in flames. But Taylor did not blame Thomas for any of it, instead she embraced his actions knowing things were gonna change soon. 

Gally came furious to Thomas and punched him, blaming him for all the mess and how the Grievers are now angry with the Gladers. In an attempt to regain his memories, Thomas stabs himself with a  Griver stinger. 

“No! Thomas what are you doing?” Taylor called out to him, catching him as he fell after the impact of the sting. 

She waits, and waits. Since Thomas was knocked unconscious because of the sting, Gally made it that Thomas was put in a cell. So Taylor waited right next to the cell until Thomas woke up. She kept looking at him and then at her necklace. She felt like all this time she knew Thomas, something within her made her feel some sort of attraction towards Thomas. Like if they were meant to be. 

Thomas woke up, his eyes shooting open as if he were amazed or surprised. 

“Thomas you’re awake!” Taylor shoots him a smile as she combs back her blonde hair with her hands. “I have some bad news for you.”

All the while Taylor is telling him how Gally is going to sacrifice him and Teresa, Thomas cannot stop looking at her with a face. He just stares into those blue eyes, knowing full well the whole story, the reason for that necklace. He knows about her past, her memories. But he chose to keep that inside...for now. 

“Are you okay Thomas?”

“Why do you never give up on me? Like, here, you always takes my side, are always by my side, why?”

Taylor just shrugged, “I don’t know. I just feel comfortable and safe around you. Someone who makes me feel that way couldn’t be bad.”

Thomas smiles and puts his fingers through the cell spaces. Taylor grabs his fingers and with a heart warming grin opens the cell for him. 

Without Taylor, Thomas goes to the other to tell them about what he remembered. As Gally tries to sacrifice Thomas and Teresa, the other Gladers free them and are on their way through the maze. 

Taylor is very much afraid, going through the maze. She is afraid of the what she calls spiders, but the Grievers. As she walks through with the others for the first time Thomas holds her hand in his. 

“I’m here Tay. I’m gonna protect you.”

That made Taylor feel at more ease. As Taylor and the group come face to face with the monsters, Thomas saves and protects Taylor. They make it past through the Grievers, some from the group have passed but the survivors stumble upon a laboratory. 

“What in the hel* is this?” Taylor asks as she and the others see dead scientists and technicians there. “It looks like there was a shootout here or something.”

Suddenly a woman in a video recording shows up. Her name is Ava Paige, she starts explaining that the planet is broken by a solar flare, and then there’s the deadly virus called the Flare that if someone were to have it, it would affect the brain. The Gladers, Taylor, are immune to the flare. She then learns how all this, the maze, the chaos, all the hel* that they were put through was for an experiment. It was to study their brains as it worked as a resistance to the virus. Taylor feels as if she knows the woman, she keeps an eye on her while Thomas stares at Taylor, knowing the full story. 

Taylor can see in the background of the video, these men start coming out in these mercenary clothing and start shooting the others there. Dr. Paige lifts a gun to her head and before she shoots herself she utters these last words, “and remember, W.C.K.D is good.” She pulls the trigger and shoots the bullet in her head. 

Taylor shouts in surprise and puts her face to Thomas’s chest. Thomas pats her back lovingly and looks completely shocked, not knowing what the next step is.

 As Taylor looks back she sees, “Gally?” The whole group turns around and sees that Gally is there. It appears as if he has been stung from a Griever. He has a gun in his hand, his body starts shaking as he starts to tear up. 

“Gally...stop what you are doing. We can talk about this.” Taylor tries to reassure him as she puts her hand in front of Thomas to protect him. 

“We can’t leave.” Gally starts as he shaking his head. 

“We did Gally, we’re out.” Thomas says as he’s on alert mode. Nobody knowing what Gally is going to do next. “We’re free.”

“Free?” Gally laughs as he looks around. “You think we’re free out there? No, no there’s no escape from this place.” He then lifts the gun at the group. Every one gasps and walks back. Thomas tries to reason with him. “Gally listen to me. You’re not thinking straight. You’re not.”

Taylor turns around to see Minho tighten his grip around his spear. 

“And we can help you,” Thomas pleads. “Just put down the gun.”

With his gun pointing directly at Thomas, Gally cries, “I belong to the maze.”

“Just put down the gun,” Thomas says again. 

“We all do,” Gally says as he’s about to shoot. 

“Gally!” Thomas and Taylor scream as Chuck goes in front of Thomas and Taylor. Every thing happened at the speed of light. The gun was shot but Minho threw his spear directly into Gally’s chest. Every one is scared and shocked at the sight before them. Gally is struggling to breathe as he falls atop the broken pieces of glass. Just as Taylor thought everything was going to be okay Chuck starts to breathe differently. 

“Thomas,” Chuck says as he looks at him and Taylor looks down to his chest to see the bullet shot Chuck. 

“No, oh god please no,” Taylor starts crying as Thomas catches him before he fell to the floor. 

“Oh shi*, oh shi*,” Thomas panics as he runs his hands up and down Chucks face and chest, not knowing what to do with the wound. “Look at me, Chuck just hang on.” Thomas tries to talk him into staying alive, giving him words of encouragement. Taylor’s vision starts to become blurry from all her crying. 

As Chuck struggles to breathe he hands Thomas the carving he did that he was going to give to his parents. He is now entrusting that Thomas finish the quest. 

“No, Chuck you’re gonna give that to them, remember? You’re gonna live, my sweet Chuck.” Taylor voice comes out in broken sobs but at the same time her voice is soothing and comforting. Her hands go to stroke Chuck’s curly hair, wanting his death to be as peaceful as possible. 

“Thank you,” Chuck smiles as he looks up to Taylor and then Thomas. His breathing is loud and then...it stops. Those were Chuck’s last words. 

“Chuck? Chuck, hey. Hey, Chuck c’mon! Oh my god!” Thomas sobs as he sees his friend die right in front of him. His eyes still open as he fell asleep in death. Taylor looks up to see the rest of the group crying as well. She starts by putting a hand on Thomas’s back but she as well is sobbing vigorously. “Oh Chuck.”

Suddenly, a door opens and a bright light falls through the room. These men start running in as Teresa calls out for him. Thomas does not care, his tears and crying are all that comes out of him. Taylor puts her hand on her mouth and closes her eyes as she cries some more. The men come in and take the others away, but the pull Taylor and Thomas away from Chuck’s body. As they try to take Thomas away Thomas wiggles out of their grasp and crawls away to Chuck’s body. They pull him away as he cries to let him go. Taylor and the rest run out into a whole landscape of sandy dunes. Every one is ushered into a helicopter. As they throw Thomas in, Taylor grabs him and sits next to him, holding his hand. The masked man reassures the others that they are safe. The helicopter flies up and down below is the maze. Taylor opens her mouth in shock as she sees what the maze truly looks like. All her life that’s all she’s ever know. She was afraid to see what life was like after all this. 

“Relax kid, everything's gonna change,” the masked man says. 

Taylor looks out the window to the new possibilities, to the new future of her life. 

It had been a couple of years since Taylor was rescued, along with other Gladers, from the maze. They are all taken to a facility by a man named Mr. Janson. He tells the group that the building is a safe haven, it will protect them. That they are protected by WCKD, the virus and the after math of the virus...cranks. He also gives food, clothes, and sanitation. There are also others from different mazes present there.

Taylor met one girl that was also in her shoes. She was part of a maze as well. She was also bigger than most of the girls so Taylor and her had a lot in common. Her name was Jessica. On the first night that they stayed, Taylor felt afraid and unsure but Jessica made her feel welcomed and safe. 

(this is Jessica: oc, models name is Paloma Elsesser)

During lunch after Taylor would talk with her friends she would then talk with Jessica. 

“Don’t you feel its a little bit...odd.” Taylor asks one day as she stares at the people working at the facility. 

“What do you mean by odd?” Jessica raises her brow. 

“I mean, why would they give us all this? Like what are they really doing behind closed doors?”

“I don’t know about you but I’m happy with having these things. I think you’re just worrying too much.”

Taylor bit her lip as she nodded, “yeah you’re probably right.”

No...Taylor was very wrong. Thomas and another boy from another maze named Aris Jones went to inspect what was really happening behind closed doors. To Taylor it was horrific. She felt that every one here lied to her. They learned that Dr. Ava Paige is still alive and that Mr. Janson is working for WCKD. Taylor even learned that they were experiment on the immunes and Janson has yet to find the Right Arm, which is a resistance group located in the mountains. 

“Tay, they lied to us. All of us,” Thomas says as he tries to convince her. Taylor nods and hugs him. “Don’t worry Thomas, I would never lie to you. And besides we will always find a way out.” She smiles up at him and as they get closer and closer Jessica interrupts, “Oh am I ruining something here?”

Taylor puts her hand on her hip and chuckles, “no you’re not. C’mon I have a lot of explaining to do with you.” 

The group including Aris and Jessica escape the facility. Everyone runs to the doors as they announce on the speakers the count down. Thomas holds Taylor’s hand as they run while Jessica holds onto Newt’s hand. 

As Thomas tries to put the card in to open the door Mr. Janson and his group show up. The door isn’t opening though. 

“Aw shi*, it looks like its jammed!” Taylor becomes worried as Thomas keeps re trying and re trying. 

“Oh my god we’re not gonna make it,” Jessica bits her nails. 

“Thomas!” Yells rat-face. Everyone starts panicking and they start hitting the door while Thomas grabs the gun he’s holding and points it to Mr. Janson. 

“Open this door Janson,” Thomas comes closer with the gun, while Janson holds his hands up in surrender mode. 

“You really don’t want me to!”

“Open the dam* door!” Thomas screams while Taylor and Minho try to go through the door. 

“Listen to me! I’m trying to save your life. The maze is one thing but you kids would not last a day out in the scorch. If the elements won’t kill you, the cranks will. Thomas, you have to believe me. I only want whats best for you.”

Finally Thomas shows Janson’s true colors, he reveals the secret Janson has been keeping. “Yeah let me guess, WCKD is good?”

Janson becomes agitated and he lets his arms down, “you’re not getting through that door Thomas. 

“Its unlocked!” Taylor shouts as the door starts to move upward. On the other side you are met with Alvis and Winston. “Hey guys.”

“C’mon,” Frypan says as he runs out. Everyone goes except for Taylor. Taylor wants to wait for Thomas so she moves next to him. “C’mon Thomas we have to go! Lets go!” Thomas starts shooting Janson and his men as he backs up with Taylor. The gun stops working and he throws it to the men. As Thomas turns around to run away he grabs Taylor’s hand and they run together to the door with Janson and his men following them. 

Janson says in his watch, “shut the main vault door. Shut the main vault door!”

As Taylor and Thomas are running to the door, the door starts to close. 

“No!” Shouts Teresa. 

Taylor grasps Thomas’s hand so hard as she runs for dear life. 

The group starts to shout at the two of them, “C’mon Thomas, Taylor! C’mon!”

The door almost closes as Taylor and Thomas slide under the small gap that was left. The two make it leaving Taylor so terrified. 

“Oh my god girl you scared me!” Jessica says as she grabs Taylor in a tight hug, helping her get up. “C’mon we gotta go.”

Alvis hits the lock so that Janson cannot get through. As the group is about to leave Winston grabs a gun making Taylor do the same. Thomas sees that Janson cannot get through so he puts his middle finger up, making Taylor laugh. They all run away. Taylor holding onto Jessica’s hand as they make it to the exit. The alarm sounding off. Thomas opens the huge doors and whats shown out there is really a windy sandy place. Taylor’s afraid and she holds onto Jessica’s hand tighter. 

“We got this Tay,” Jessica says with a smile. “We gonna be fine, you’ll see.”

Taylor nods and the group get out and into the scorch. 

Taylor and the rest end up at an abandoned market place. Its dark and very spooky, no light reaching inside at all.

“Wow its so dark, man,” Jessica puts her hands out in front of her to prove a point. 

Minho then starts the generator and as the lights come on it looks as if people were here before. There are tents and blankets resting on the floor, lights that are strung above the items. More lights keep turning on, lamps, small lights, they keep flashing on. Minho smiles thinking every thing is fine until a, what seems to be a woman, comes slamming on the fence door. Her mouth and eyes are pitch black and she has veins all over her face. 

Minho and Taylor scream in unison, “Thomas watch out!”

“What the hel* is that?” As Taylor stands next to Minho, bringing Thomas back. As those words left her mouth there was more screeching behind them. Taylor, Minho, and Thomas turned around and out came a whole group of them. 

“Oh my god theres more!” Taylor said backing away, her backpack behind her carrying her gun.

One of them came limping to the group but Minho picked up a sledgehammer and smacked the thing with it. 

“What the hell is that thing?” Minho asks, his flashlight shining on them. Out in the distance more of them came, “C’mon we gotta go! We gotta go!” Thomas shouted, pulling Taylor by her jacket with him. Running out the double doors the Cranks are right behind them. Taylor helps the boys to close the door before the crank could come in. 

“Hold it down!” Shouts Minho. 

“What?” Thomas asks. Taylor sees Minho is having some trouble pushing the huge cabinets to cover the door so she goes next to him and helps push. “Watch out Thomas!” Taylor exclaims as the cabinet falls to cover the door. 

Now, cranks are coming out of every corner. “Oh shi*,” Taylor mutters as Thomas grabs her hand and they all run away. Making it up the escalator Taylor follows Thomas but she slips and her foot gets caught in the escalator. Thomas and Minho almost up ahead don’t take notice of her fall. Taylor, panicking tries to take her foot out but it is really stuck. She turns her head back and sees the cranks coming closer. “Thomas! Minho!” Her screams echoes through the building and Thomas turns around not seeing Taylor. 

“Minho wheres Taylor?!?”

Minho shrugs and his eyes widen. “Crap c’mon!” 

Thomas ran like he has never ran in his life, he ran faster than ever in the maze. “I need to help her. Please, oh god please, please be okay.” He thought in his head thinking about Taylor. 

Taylor, still shouting sees the cranks coming closer and closer. She starts to tear up, this is it, this is where she dies. As the cranks are almost to her Thomas and Minho make it and see that indeed her foot it stuck. 

“Oh Tay this may hurt,” Minho winces as he sees her foot, but then he quickens as he sees how many are behind them. “Shi*”

Thomas grabs her hand, “don’t worry Tay, I’m right here. I won’t let anything happen to you.” His other hand is tending to her foot. 

Taylor smiles and puts her head back along with her hands. “I’ll hold them off boys.” She pulls her gun out and starts shooting those that are almost to them. 

“Okay but she’s a badas*,” Minho chuckles seeing even though Taylor hurting she still manages to get the work done!

“C’mon,” Thomas says as he is getting frustrated. Finally they set her free and she sprints in front of Thomas, him still holding her hand to make sure she is safe and with him now 100 percent of the time. 

“I told you we got you,” Thomas smiles as they now run so fast away from the cranks close up on them.

As Taylor, Minho and Thomas sprint ahead they see the rest of their group. 

“We have to warn them!” Taylor said as she started to wave her hands to get their attention and to show panic. 

“Hey!” Shouts Thomas. The rest of the group look at the three running and they wear a curious face. The three yell all different things, warnings, to run, to go away. 

“Why aren’t they moving?” Minho asks as he runs ahead of Taylor. Then Taylor sees their horrified face when they see the cranks running ahead. The others start running as the cranks get closer to Taylor. Taylor, already tired keeps her head in the game. Jumping over man boxes laid on the floor so as not to lose the momentum. A back pack is thrown to Thomas and Taylor assists him in putting it on. The group now rejoined, they make their way up another escalator. As they make their way up a crank appears out of nowhere and the others are scared and taken aback. Aris gets his bat and hits the crank with it. More cranks appear and the group is split up for only a short while. Teresa is split with Thomas while Taylor is put with the others. A crank comes at Taylor and Newt and as it is about to get the two of them Taylor pulls out her gun and aims straight at the cranks head, pulling the trigger. “Bulls eye,” Taylor smirks. Everyone meets up again as they try to make it to the exit. Newt again gets tackled by a crank and Thomas saves him. A whole group of cranks start appearing from the distance to the group of Taylor’s. Everyone runs to a small corridor that is nearby. It is tight and compact and no one knows where they are going. The cranks go into the tiny space as well. Everyone freaks out. 

“C’mon guys move it!” Taylor shouts as it is hard for her to manage in that tight space. They make it to doors but as Thomas and Minho try to open them up they cannot because they are locked. 

“Are you serious right now?” Taylor panics as she combed her hair with her fingers. 

Minho and Thomas try to open it up and Winston shouts, “I’ll hold them back.” He pulls out his gun while Taylor does the same. She stands next to Winston and starts shooting the cranks. Winston smiles at her and she nods, grinning. Frypan finally opens the door and Thomas grabs Taylor’s hand to go through the door first. As Winston tries to go out he gets caught by some cranks and as they try to take him out of the grasps of the cranks the cranks start scratching him on the stomach. Taylor with Minho and Thomas try to close the doors but Thomas sends Minho away. 

“Go Tay, I got this, go.”

“No I’m not leaving you. We do this together.”

Thomas looks at the cranks and at the right time he grabs Taylor’s hands and they both run away together. 

They all spent the night under some debris just waiting for the right time to make a run for it. 

When they all wake up, Thomas looks out to see if it is safe to leave. In the light of the morning sun Taylor peers around her surroundings and sees how city is in ruins. 

“WCKD is probably still looking for us. We have to move.” Taylor says as she stretches and grabs her gun. She grabs Jessica’s hand and brings her up for a stand. 

As the group trudges along through the sand Winston’s infection is getting worse until he falls down. Taylor can see the pain evident on his face, she feels so sorry for him. She wanted him to make it. She looked at the others face and some knew but some had hope. That was good for him in that moment, to have hope. 

“I’m not gonna make it,” Winston says in a rough, hoarse voice. His breathing is starting to quicken. Everyone looks at each other, not knowing what to do. “Please don’t let me turn into one of those things.”

Taylor feels a tear fall down her cheek, her heart breaking at what she is seeing. Winston pulls his hand out as if to hand something to him. 

Everyone is frozen but Newt goes and takes the gun. Thomas thinks that he’s going to shoot Winston but he doesn’t. Instead Newt gives him the gun, it will be on Winston’s time to do that to himself. 

“Thank you,” Winston manages to say. “Now get out of here.”

“Goodbye Winston,” Newt swallows the pain as he looks into his eyes. 

Everyone leaves until its just Taylor and Thomas. Thomas’s eyes become glassy as he looks at a dying man. “Its alright,” Winston reassures him in his last moments. 

“I’m sorry,” Thomas whispers. 

Winston’s last words were, “Thomas, take care of them okay?”

Thomas nods and leaves with Taylor. 

As they go and move away a gun shot is heard through out. It echoes in the world. Everyone pauses and just takes a time to gather themselves up and proceed. Taylor still has tears coming out but she doesn’t want to make a scene so she tries to compose herself and wipes her tears away. 

Thomas sees this and holds her hand, “hey you know, its okay to cry.” He said it more as a statement then a question. Taylor brought him into a hug and cried into his shoulders, feeling mentally tired and emotionally. But she was determined to make it to the end.  

Night came and so did sleep, but as the group was in slumber Thomas woke up to a civilization in the distance, but they are also greeted by a thunderstorm. They run to an abandoned building for shelter but as they are running Jessica slows down. Minho helps and tries to save her by helping her in running but he gets struck by the lighting. 

“Minho!” Jessica and Thomas cream in unison. As they take him to the shelter he does indeed survive. Jessica hugs him lightly, not wanting to hurt him and smiles, “thanks Min Min for saving my as*, I am a god dam* slow runner. For real though, thank you.”

They are greeted with chained up cranks. One after enough coming at them but not quite yet making it. 

“I see you’ve met our guard dogs.” A new voice calls out. It is a girl, she walks up to all of the group and smiles, “you guys look like shi*.”

“Hel* I like her already,” Jessica chuckles but Taylor hits her lightly on the chest. “Ow, what she seems pretty okay.”

“We don’t know what she’s like,” Taylor whispered to Jessica. 

“Don’t worry I don’t bite, the names Brenda.”

They meet Brenda and Jorge who lead a dangerous group of survivors. Brenda and Jorge learn that Thomas and his group had come from WCKD and are looking for the right arm they agree to take them to them. 

Moments later WCKD arrives and storms the place but Jorge’s bombs go off and the facility is destroyed. Taylor and Thomas split up. Taylor ends up with Jorge’s group while Brenda and Thomas are left behind. 

Thomas P.O.V.

Thomas and Brenda escape the cranks but Brenda gets infected by one. Thomas gets another flashback and remembers when he was working for WCKD. He tried to warn Teresa and Taylor about WCKD’s plans but they were all separated by WCKD’s troops. 

Thomas ends up kissing Brenda but as he is kissing her he thinks of...”Taylor.” he breathes out. 

“What,” Brenda asks as she stand back. 

“You are not her.” Thomas wanted that kiss to be Taylor. That was it, he knew he was in love with Taylor. 

Thomas P.O.V. end

Thoma and Brenda meet up with Taylor and the rest of the group again. Taylor runs to hug Thomas and puts her hands on his cheek, “oh my god. I thought something terrible happened to you.”

Thomas grins and puts his hands on her cheeks, “I’m fine, along with the help of her.” He points to Brenda and Taylor’s heart almost shatters. She can see something, some type of affection going on between the two. 

Taylor nods her head while putting up a fake smiles, “oh thats good. I’m glad you both made it out safely.” She puts her hands down and walks away. First she had to deal with Teresa now Brenda. She clenched her fist knowing how this ends. It will end with either beautiful girls getting the guy and Taylor getting no one. With big girls thats how it always ends. 

Jessica finds Taylor sitting away from the group. “Hey Tay Tay, whats wrong girl?”

Taylor just shrugs, “I know Thomas so well already.”

“What?” Jessica asks as she sits beside her. 

“I feel like I’ve known Thomas, like I’ve known him forever...Jess...I’m in love with Thomas.”

“Oh shi*,” Jessica mutters. 

“Yeah, oh shi* is right and I know he either likes Teresa or Brenda way more than fat old me.”

“Don’t say those things,” Jessica puts her arm over Taylor’s shoulder. “You are way more than that you hear? So what if you got a little junk in the trunk you are special Taylor. You did what other big girls no, what other girls think is impossible. You escaped that maze you escaped WCKD you did so many incredible things. You are kind and sweet but ooh but do you have sass! If Thomas cannot see all the amazing things I see or for who you really are than girl, he is not meant for you. You are a diamond in the rough sand paper sand.” Jessica picks up a pile of sand and this makes them both laugh. 

(not my gif! do not own)

“Thanks sis, I needed that,” Jessica helps Taylor stand up and they both embrace. 

“What a beautiful embrace, are we celebrating cause we’re not dead ladies?” Minho jokes, waiting patiently for the two of them. 

“Can I get some of that action?” Frypan chuckles as he playfully hits Minho like am I right?

The two side eye them, “No boys were are celebrating us big women...we can do anything, and that boys is a fact.” Taylor and Jessica walk hand in hand back to the group. 

Jorge interrogates Marcus, a survivor works for WCKD, into revealing the whereabouts of The Right Arm.

The group goes and finds their way arrive at the right arm relief camps. There are other survivors there and they are greeted by a man named Vince. He is the leader and decides if Thomas’s group can stay or not. 

Brenda’s infection worsens and Vince threatens to shoot her. But a former scientist that worked for WCKD stops Vince. “Hello Thomas and hello to you too Taylor.”

“You know me?” Thomas asks the stranger. 

Taylor’s face becomes of confusion, “wait how do you know us?”

“Interesting...it makes sense they put you two in the maze.”

“Thomas, what is she talking about?” Taylor raises her brow. Thomas knows and he looks away. “How does she know who I am? How does she know I was in the maze?” Taylor tries to look into his eyes but he looks away, almost ashamed. “Anybody?” When she looks at the others they too are not looking at her. Jessica pats Taylor’s shoulder. 

“Though I must admit,” the scientist kept going. “I was worried they’d kill ya after what you did.”

“After what you did, Thomas what does she mean?” At this point Taylor was getting furious, she felt like she was invisible. The stranger went to Brenda and tended to her. But she could see that Taylor and Thomas were both searching for answers. 

“What I did?” Thomas asked. 

“The first time we spoke you said you couldn’t take it no more. Watching your friends die one by one. The last time we spoke you gave me the coordinates of every WCKD compound, trial, and lab.”

“He was our source,” said Vince. 

“They couldn’t have pulled this off without him,” the scientist praised Thomas. “Take her [Brenda] to the tent. Get these guys some warm clothes.” They carried Brenda away. As Taylor went to ask Thomas what happened she saw the glances Teresa kept giving Thomas. 

Jessica saw that Taylor’s face was of anger so she placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder, “hey you think you’re gonna be alright?”

Taylor looked into her brown, haze eyes and nodded, “you know me Jess...I’m always alright.”

Jessica smiled and left her. Taylor grabbed harshly both Thomas and Teresa behind one of the tents. “What the hel* was all that back there?” Taylor shouted as anger entered into her. 

“Please Tay, let me explain.” Thomas tried to calm her, putting both his hands on her shoulders. 

“Please, make it quick. Why was she talking about us like she knew us? And you kept giving Teresa a look?”

Teresa looked down and then at Taylor, “Back then before the maze, you had worked for WCKD...”

Taylor’s face became of sadness and disbelief, “no thats not true. That can’t be-”

“It is Taylor,” Thomas whispered as he grabbed her hands. “Before the maze, you, Teresa, and me we all worked for the maze. Sticking our friends in a death maze, we did that. We worked for them. I went, when we were still working for them, to you two and tried to warn you both about WCKD but we were all separated, you were first Taylor, you were first to be put in the maze. Also, when we were working for them me and you were very close to each other...Where do you think you got that necklace?”

Taylor peers down to her chest and sees the necklace, her eyes start to water. Thats why the first time she saw Thomas she felt like she knew him. “You knew all this time and din’t think to tell me? You told her, my story, to her, and not even to me! Why would you keep something like that from me, Thomas?”

Thomas felt ashamed and guilty, “I don’t know Tay, I just-”

“He wanted to protect you,” Teresa butted in. Taylor pointed a finger at Teresa, “I don’t want to be rude, but you better but out right now or so help me god.”

Teresa walked up to Taylor, face to face, body to body, “Or what, Tay? What are you really gonna do to me? Thomas was just trying to protect you, if you really cared about his friendship then you would forgive him and you would accept the decision he made. 

“Yeah Teresa you’re are forgetting one thing, who was the first to be in that maze between us? Who had to live every breathing moment in there with just herself as the only female, and who had to accept that she may never see her family again because she doesn’t even know her history? That information was mine, Teresa, I should have, no, I needed to know that. So protect your boyfriend or your crush but nothing you say will make it better that he kept my life from me.” Taylor pushed Teresa to Thomas and went to go find Jessica. 

The scientist woman comes to Thomas and tells him he needs to give his blood. The scientists lady is Mary Cooper. As Mary halts Brenda's infection using an enzyme cure, Mary explains that the enzyme can only be harvested from an Immune's body, not manufactured, and that arguments over the methods of manufacturing the cure with Ava lead Mary's departure from WCKD.

After the argument they all had and Thomas helped Brenda Taylor saw Teresa climb these rocks. Taylor felt more angry when she saw Thomas climbing them to get to her, to see whats wrong with her. Taylor went and followed them to eaves drop on their conversation. 

“You okay?” Thomas questioned as he made it to the top and looked at Teresa. Taylor was hidden behind one of the boulder listening. “What are you doing up here?”

“Just thinking.”

“Well I’ll let you be alone.”

“Do you remember your mother?”

“Uh, I think so,” Thomas thought for a while on that question. 

“You remember mine? She’s a beautiful woman. Every body loved her, before WCKD she was all I had. When she got sick, I didn’t know what to do. They just kept her locked up, hidden. I thought she’d get better. Every night she’d make these awful sounds, like screaming. And then one night she just, stopped. It was finally quiet. I went down to her room, there was blood everywhere. And she just sat there calm. She said she was feeling better. The visions were calm, she’d taken care of them. She took her eyes out Thomas. There are millions of people suffering out there. Millions of stories just like mine. We can’t turn our backs on them. I won’t. 

Taylor’s mouth opened in shock, “please no please no.”

“What are you saying?” Thomas hoped she was talking nonsense, he hoped she did not do the thing that they were all running away from. 

“I’m saying I want you to understand.”

“Understand what?”

“Why I did it.”

In the distance there are helicopters and Taylor’s heart sinks, “oh my god they’re here.”

“Teresa...”

“Please don’t fight them Thomas.”

“What are you doing? What have you done?”

Thomas runs down and Taylor sprints in front of his path, “this way Thomas.” Even though Taylor was mad at him still she needed to protect him, she needed to protect her friends. She grabbed onto his hand and they both ran to the others to warn them, but they were too late. The helicopter shot a explosive and the camps blew up, “No!” They both scream in unison. 

There was an ambush by WCKD. As some warned others, other were dead. 

“Tay!” A high pitched scream came out as Taylor looked around she saw Jessica run to her. “Oh my god I thought they got you too.” They both hugged and tried to run away. But there were so many of the WCKD that Taylor knew she had to do something. “Jessica, listen to me, be careful.” Taylor whispered the words to her as she pushed Jessica to Thomas and stood next to Minho. 

“Go guys we got this!” Minho says as he and Taylor start shooting. 

“No, guys come back here,” Thomas shouts over the commotion. They all hide behind a couple of boxes. Just as Minho is re-loading his gun WCKD shoot a device on him that makes his still. 

“Minho!” Thomas screams as Jessica and Newt pull him back. 

“No!!!!” Taylor shouts as she starts shooting uncontrollably but someone from WCKD comes behind her and hits her with the back of their gun, making her fall down and they put the device on her. 

“Taylor!” Thomas and Jessica scream. Jessica gets up and, without any weapons tries to fight WCKD but they shoot her in the stomach. 

“NO!!!” Taylor screams at the top of her lungs. Her heart just breaking. She starts to sob as she tries to crawl to her friend. “Oh my god oh my god,” was all she could say. 

“Its okay Tay Tay, its okay. I’m sorry, I just tried.” Blood spilled and poured from her mouth and her breathing stopped. “No please no Jess, c’mon Jess please Jess. Please don’t go Jess!” Taylor shouted as she held onto her but WCKD dragged Taylor away from the body, her screams so high pitched it hurt anybodies ears. “Please don’t please, Jess!

“Tay, Minho,” Thomas shouted as he tried to get to her and him. But Vince stopped him. Thomas was crying as he looked at Taylor getting taken by WCKD. Taylor felt like her life was gone and she was already dead. As Taylor went inside the helicopter she was greeted by Ava Paige’s presence, Dr. Paige looked beyond and saw the survivors, she saw Thomas. With an evil eye she glared at him. 

Thomas P.O.V.

The whole place is a disaster. Everything is ruined. Most of the tents were burned up and the survivors are looking for any materials or items that they could save. 

“What do we do now?” Asks Frypan as he looks to the distance, trying to collect himself. 

“I would pick up whats left of us.” Scans Vince as he tries to see if there are others. “Stick to the plan, we take you kids to the safe haven. And we start over I guess.”

Thomas shakes his head and stand up, putting his backpack on. “I’m not going with you.”

Vince looks surprised, “What?”

“I made a promise to Minho and Taylor, I promised that I would protect her. Now she’s probably stuck somewhere scared, afraid, I mean she just saw her best friend die, right in front of her eyes. She means the world to me Vince, I can’t forget about them...I can’t ever forget about her. I have to go after them. ”

“Hey kid look around you,” Vince said, spreading his arms. “A’ight, WCKD just kicked our as*. Think about where you’re headed.”

 “I’m not asking anyone to come with me.”

“Thomas listen to me,” Newt motions to him, caring about his friend. “I’ve known Minho and Taylor for...for as long as I can remember. So if there’s any way we could help, trust me I would be standing there next to you. This what you’re talking about, is impossible.”

Jorge and Brenda appear and Jorge says, “more like suicide.”

“Maybe,” Thomas shrugs. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do now. It’s not just about Taylor and Minho. Its about all of us. Its about everyone WCKD’s ever taken, everyone they will take. They’ll never stop, they’ll never stop. So I’m gonna stop them. I’m gonna rescue Taylor...and I’m gonna kill Ava Paige.”

Everyone looks at each other rethinking the situation. Harriet speaks up, “I have to admit, I’d like some revenge.”

Vince sees the expression of everyone and decides to just give in and help, “wow its a good speech kid, so whats your plan?” Everyone looks to Thomas for answers. 

Thomas P.O.V. end

“Hey Minho, Minho...,” Taylor shook the boy as they were in the train to who knows where. “You hear the birds?” Minho from all the torture was already being a totally different person. Taylor wanted to lift his spirits, but on the inside she felt empty and had no hope of being saved. Minho searches for the noise Taylor was talking about and then he does hear it all of a sudden, he turns around to see Taylor copying the noise of a birds chirping. She smiles at the end and makes Minho laugh. 

As she is standing there, all their hands tied by chains, Taylor sat next to Minho. Taylor coughs a little and then starts singing, “I thought I heard the old man say; leave her Johnny leave her. Tomorrow you will get your pay; and it's time for us to leave her.” Music was such an important aspect in her life, it made her feel happy and made her feel as if she could fly. “Leave her, Johnny, leave her! Oh, leave her, Johnny, leave her! For the voyage is long and the winds don't blow. And it's time for us to leave her.” As she sang the last note she looked around to see the other kids there and Minho smiling. “You have a beautiful voice Tay,” Minho chuckled, nudging you. “Wait do you hear that?”

Taylor’s eyes search up and her head turns in his direction. It was the sound of a running car. “Yeah I do!”

Moments later there are footsteps heard up ahead on the trains roof. Taylor and Minho smile at each other, hopeful. 

Then the train starts to stop, Taylor and Minho falling forward from the harsh movement. Then a familiar voice is calling out, the others on the train are excited and start screaming for them to be rescued. 

“Taylor! Taylor! Minho!” The voice calls out to them two. They look at each other and answer with a crying yes. But are never rescued, they are instead taken back to WCKD to be tortured more. 

By many doctors Taylor is put in this machine that hooks up to her head. “Please no, not again, please.” They don’t listen to her and strap her in. 

The ocean, the waves calming and relaxing. Taylor is sitting right atop a rock, enjoying a book. In the distance she sees the maze. Her heart starts to beat quickly and she starts to panic. She hates this feeling. Her hands start to tremble. As she looks down in her book the pages start to be covered in blood. Taylor covers her mouth in disgust and tries to throw the book away but it keep landing back on her lap. Then the blood starts to make words. “They are coming for him.”

“Who’s him?” Before she could react a wave crashes on her and brings her in the ocean. She is drowning but then all of a sudden she is in a cell. It is dark, very dark and it is wet and smells horrific. “What the hel*?” Next to Taylor in the cell is Jessica’s dead body, lying there her corpse. Taylor starts to break down and she sobs as she sees her best friend dead. “Oh my god!” But then she hears...it. A griever pops out and tries to get to Taylor but Taylor is separated by the cell. As she is backing away she hears a voice. “Taylor! Taylor!”

“Thomas?” She screams and Thomas meets her, “I’m gonna get you out okay? I will protect you.”

Thomas starts to fight off the griever, by himself and Taylor starts to scream, “No Thomas I need to protect you!” Then Thomas gets stung by the Griever and the griever rips Thomas head off. Horrified Taylor screams on the top of her lungs. 

Taylor hooked to that machine makes her see these things. She screams when nothing is really there in reality with her. The doctors check her eyes and see she has spaced out, she is out of it. She becomes almost brain dead. 

Only a few times does Taylor see Minho and every time she does he is getting worse and worse. She feels so bad for him. Taylor has tried to escape and tried but it never is successful. 

She sleeps in a cold cell, thinking about her friends and about the stars. How much those starts mean to her. She is mostly out of it from all the torture. She is being scarred for life. She lays there until WCKD arrive to bring her to another torture test or to check her vitals. 

As WCKD takes her to a medical room Taylor sees from the side of her eye Minho beating up Teresa. “That bitc*” Taylor mutters under her breath as she sees Teresa got away and they had to hold Minho down. Taylor chuckles, “thats my boy.”

Teresa makes it out but is scared when she sees Taylor, “you traitor!” Taylor gets out of WCKD’s grasp and makes a run for Teresa. Taylor kicks Teresa and knees her in the stomach. Teresa is on the ground, coughing up and hurting. “Yeah feel that, now imagine that 100 times worse.” Taylor lifts Teresa’s face by her hair so Taylor can see her better. “Thats how it felt when you took everything I loved away from me.” Teresa is crying and they pull Taylor back. “I won’t let you do that to Minho. I wont!”

Taylor was taken to be tortured again. Her hands in cuffs as if she were a prisoner. Suddenly, the alarm started to blare. The sirens turning on an alarming WCKD that something is wrong. They still took her into the room and went to hook her up. 

Minho P.O.V.

As Minho escaped the medical room where they were going to sedate him he met up with Thomas and Newt. 

“Minho,” Thomas said, sounding relieved. 

Minho looked to Newt and Thomas, “is this real?” They all smile but then Minho realizes Taylor is about to get tortured now. “Guys Tay’s in trouble, we need to go save her. I know where she is!”

Minho P.O.V. end

They hooked up all the wires to her brain and they were about to start it when there was a loud bang almost outside the door. All the WCKD doctors were scared, alarmed. One stood up and went to go see what the commotion was. There was another bang and then footsteps. Thomas, Newt, and Minho appeared in Taylor’s room and shot everyone there. A female doctor was about to press the button to put Taylor into that machine but Thomas shot her. 

“Oh my god!” Taylor screamed, strapped to her chair. “I can’t believe its you guys!”

Thomas, quickly, unstrapped Taylor and then picked her up so she was standing right in front of him. He felt his heart beating fast, he felt so happy to see Taylor. Here she was living, breathing, right in front of him. It was like a miracle. He sees though the bangs under her eyes and how she looks drained, tired. “Oh my god Tay, what did they do to you?”

Taylor started to cry but out of joy and happiness that she was saved, “they tortured me. They,” her cries were sobs now. “They made me believe that it was you, Thomas. You were killed and that to me was the worst torture.” Thomas puts hugs Taylor and puts his hands on her cheek. His face showing worry and sadness that Taylor had to go through that. “Its the worst torture to me because I couldn’t protect you Thomas, I couldn’t save you.” Taylor’s blue eyes looked up to Thomas’s brown ones and Thomas just went for it. 

Thomas leaned in, passionately to kiss Taylor. He brought her closer to him. He put his hands all over her curves not caring about them, just loving the girl for who she is and thinking she is the most beautiful woman on the earth. They both closed their eyes in the kiss and it was hard and passionate, his tongue slipping inside just for a minute. Just to have one taste of her. It was full of love. 

(not my gif! do not own)

Both their foreheads rested on each others and they smiled, “I love you so much Taylor.”

“I love you more, Thomas. I need to say I’m sorry for getting so angry with you not telling me about my past. I get why you did it, you were trying to protect me.” She steps closer to Thomas and takes a hold of his hands while Thomas kisses her lips and forehead. “Its okay Tay, I’m sorry for keeping that away from you. I felt so scared and not sure when WCKD had taken you. You mean so much to me, not Teresa, not Brenda, you.”

Taylor kisses his lips again and sees the boys face in the back. Newt is so over it, rolling his eyes. And Minho looks as if he’s gonna throw up. 

“Are you guys like done. We kinda have to get out of here,” Minho broke the silence. 

Taylor and Thomas chuckle, “wow they are just, wow.”

Taylor nodded, “I know, way to ruin the moment guys!”

Newt rubs his temple, “If I have to see one more kiss I may just leave on my own.” He chuckles at the end. 

Taylor and Thomas laugh and they grab hands and make a run for it. 

As they run they meet some folks from WCKD and they run into a random room. Thomas locks the door. There is someone banging the door from outside, this scares Taylor and she holds onto Thomas for support. “Don’t worry Tay, I got you. I won’t let anything bad happen to you again.”

“Newt c’mon,” Minho goes to a cart and places it in front of the door. 

“Um Thomas, what do we do?” Taylor asks as she sees the huge window in the room. Every one is trying to think of a plan but WCKD  already is using a blade to try to pry the door open. 

“Any ideas?” Minho questions. 

Thomas looks at the window and then back at the group, “maybe.”

“Oh hel* no! You do realize how thick I am, I’m gonna be the first one down there and then you guys will come afterwords and use me as a soft landing.” They all look at Taylor as she said that and she just waves them away, “never mind.”

Every one helps getting a tank through the window. It falls to the water down below. 

“Okay its doable. Just need a little running start.” Thomas says as he goes back. 

“Oh my god are we serious about this? Is he serious? What if that water is shallow, we’ll die Thomas!” Taylor tries to reason with him, her heart thumping out of her chest. They all go next to Thomas, Taylor holding his hand to feel more comforted even though she felt so terrified. 

“You sure about this?” Minho asks, scared. 

Thomas looks at Taylor and shakes his head, “not really.”

Minho rolls his eyes, “nice pep talk.”

“Yeah, I’m bloody inspired.” Newt says too. 

“Ugh we’re gonna have to do it,” Taylor cracks her neck and is prepared, putting on her game face. But the door flies open and Janson comes through, angry. “Fuc* it!” Taylor says as the group runs forward. 

They all jump and through the jump Taylor’s hand is holding Thomas’s. Some one screamed Thomas name and then someone cursed. Taylor just screamed so loud the whole way down. 

As the group is running through the last city they are met up with, “Gally?”

Gally sees Taylor and chuckles, “hey Tay, its nice to-”

Taylor runs to him and punches his all over but Thomas pulls her away, “why are we with this guy? He’s a traitor! He killed Chuck!”

“I know Tay, I know. He’s on our side now. He saved us.” Thomas brings her back and tries to control her. 

“Also Gally was stung and out of his mind when he did that,” Newt said as he put a reassuring arm around her. 

Taylor still feels like she wants to kill Gally, “how the hel* did you survive anyways?”

“I was saved, treated and now I’m helping you guys. Like I said, its nice to see you again Tay.”

“Yeah well I wish I could say the same thing.” Taylor answers back sassy. “What happened here?” 

Explosives go off, there is fire and terror every where. People are screaming, violent. Its like the end of the world it seems to Taylor’s eyes. 

 Then Taylor hears harsh breathing coming from Newt. “Newt?”

Newt sends Minho and Gally away, also wanting Taylor to go. “No, I’m not going anywhere. Thomas, whats wrong with him?” 

Thomas looks down, sad and Taylor’s heart almost drops. “No he can’t no.”

“I do Tay. I have it.” Newt says in an almost reassuring voice. His lips turning black like if they were goop. Alarming Taylor and Thomas that they need to figure out something quick. As Newt is struggling he hands Thomas a silver pendant. Taylor and Thomas assist Newt in walking to a safer place and they end up to an empty area where Newt passes out. 

All of a sudden Teresa’s voice is heard through out the whole city. She explains that Thomas, with his blood, can save Newt if he comes back to WCKD.

Thomas has tears in his eyes and so does Taylor but Newt stands up. Awkwardly like he isn’t himself. 

“Newt?” Thomas says, trying to sound gentle. 

Taylor’s heart was going so fast. She felt that she already knew but she didn’t want to believe it. “Newt, we’re here buddy. We are here for you, shank.”

Newt turns around and Taylor already knew, he had become one of them. Newt looks directly at Thomas, “Newt.”

Saliva coming out of Newt’s mouth and looking like a total different...thing, he charges towards Thomas. Thomas pushes him away making him fall on the floor but he gets back up. 

“Newt its me, its me!” Thomas tries to tell Newt but Newt is not the same person anymore. 

“Newt we wont hurt you!” Taylor tries to get into his head. She pulls Newt away from Thomas throwing him on the floor. Newt tackles Thomas and with the forces of Taylor’s strength and Thomas’s they roll him away. Newt gets up and jumps on Taylor and almost bites her. “Thomas help! Newt stop please! Its me, Taylor!” She is screaming as his mouth is almost a few spaces away from her face. Thomas kicks Newt and Newt falls on his back on the floor. Thomas helps Taylor stand and as they get up Newt utters for them to kill him. 

Newt, again tackles Thomas and Taylor tries to get him off but Newt is too strong. As Thomas utter his name Newt stops. “I’m sorry Tommy, I’m sorry Tommy.”

“Its okay, its okay,” Thomas smiles at Newt. Newt then grabs Thomas’s gun and tries to shoot himself in the head. Taylor quickly grabs the gun away from him. “No!”

Newt grabs his knife and tries to stab Thomas. Thomas struggles to keep the blade from intruding his chest so Taylor puts her hands on the blade to stop him. Her hands are getting cut, slicing through soft skin. Taylor winces at the pain and notices blood dripping from her hands on Thomas’s shirt. The shirt soaking up the crimson liquid. “Please Newt stop.” Taylor pushes Newt off with Thomas punching him in the face. 

As Newt and Thomas fight, Newt trying to stab Thomas they meet up together. Taylor hears the knife slicing through and starts to cry. It didn’t matter who it stabbed, it wasn’t like she cared more for one and not the other. She cared for both of them so much. “Newt, Thomas...” She muttered as she started to sob. 

They hold on more to each other and as they part the knife went into Newt’s chest. “No! No! There has to be so way, please no, please!” Taylor is panicking at this moment, she is uncontrollably sobbing. Her heart breaking more as if that were possible. “No Newt, not my Newt.” 

“Tommy...” Newt whispers, as himself. He falls down but Thomas catches him so his fall would be less painful. “Tay...”

Taylor was right beside him, holding his hands and looking into his eyes. Brushing his honey golden strands back. 

Taylor then remembers the things her and Newt did. Its like a whole book she thinks of. She spent so many years with him she felt not herself. She remembers when they would garden together. Newt would pretend that the carrots were his teeth and do funny faces with them. Taylor would throw dirt on him and say if he were to grow into a flower, he would be the most beautiful flower out there. Whenever Taylor would feel sad or sick, Newt was there for her. Cuddling with her, taking care of her, worrying about her. All those times worrying, when she wanted him to have a great life. Whenever Taylor felt self conscious Newt would always say, “don’t think about those bloody thoughts love, to me you are perfectly splendid in every way.” Then he would end it off with his charming smile. One time Taylor drew a portrait of himself, resting against the tree, so peaceful. Newt smiled and was shocked, calling Taylor the most creative person in the world. “You got my good side also,” he would chuckle with a wink. The most fondest memory Taylor has of her and Newt is that they both would rest and lay upon the tall blades of grass. Laying next to each other but Newt was laying up and Taylor was laying down. Their heads were next to each other. Taylor would sing to Newt, making Newt feel at peace. He always liked her singing. Then would it would come of night Taylor would read the stars and tell him, “I see big things, for the both of us. Our lives will change Newt, you’ll see.” Then she would ask Newt, “if we did make it out of here Newt...where would you go?” Newt would take a while and Taylor would smile, “I’d love to go to the ocean, full of water and...stuff. Who knows?” Newt would look directly into Taylor’s eyes and nod, “I would go anywhere, as long as its with you.” Taylor would grin and give him a huge bear hug. “Don’t worry shank, we’ll get there. We’ll always get there and when we do, we’ll do it Newt, together.”

Taylor cried as she looked at Newt’s dying form. She collected herself and looked directly into his eyes, clasping him hand and running her finger through his hair. As the wind howls low in the night Taylor breathes in and out, (this song is called rainbow by kacey musgraves)  “Oh tie up your bow, take off your coat and take a look around ” She starts singing, knowing Newt would love to hear the peaceful melody. His breathing starts to relax and he smiles, looking directly into her ocean blue eyes. He can’t utter a word but Taylor knows what he would say, “thats bloody good mate” or “wow Tay, to hear that come out of you is amazing, its like everything is possible.” 

“Tay..” Thomas whispers, tears coming out more. The lyrics mean something so important to Taylor. Thomas nods and knows Newt, no, Newt deserves to go away peacefully. 

“Everything is alright now” Taylor sings to him telling him he can let go, he can go now that they will be alright and he does not have to suffer or worry no more. 

The lyrics mean to Taylor so much. This song is for Winston, Jessica...Chuck. All those who passed away for fighting for something they believed in. 

“'Cause the sky is finally open, the rain and wind stopped blowin' But you're stuck out in the same old storm again” Taylor means as she makes up the lyrics as she goes that the sky is opening to welcome Newt, so Newt can see his friends Newt can see Winsont, Jessica, and Chuck. He can play with them and tell them jokes and use his beautiful accent. Taylor starts to shed some more tears knowing she’ll never get to hear Newt say her name again, she’ll never hear his little comments about anything any more. She struggles to sing the other lines but she does it knowing they are important to Newt. 

“Let go of your umbrella, darlin' I'm just tryin' to tell ya That there's always been a rainbow hangin' over your head Yeah there's always been a rainbow hangin' over your head” The umbrella means for Newt to let go, thats its okay for Newt to die. But the rainbow part means that his friends his family were always there for him and they will always be there for him and that they will always remember him. Then he’ll get to see so many rainbows where he’s going, he’ll get to play with them and be himself. 

As Newt gives his last breath Taylor sings the last part, “It all be alright” Newt dies with his eyes open and Taylor closes them and kisses his cheek. “We’re gonna miss you Newt. Have fun my darling Newt...” Taylor and Thomas hug as they sob together. Brenda arrives but she is too late. 

Thomas and Taylor go to WCKD and confront Ava. She keeps insisting that their ways are good. She is then killed by Janson who is infected. As Janson knocks Thomas out Taylor runs away and hides, following them. He takes Thomas to a lab where Teresa is ready to extract his blood. Janson tells though that he and WCKD are only truly interested in curing those whom they please, which results in Teresa turning on him. 

Thomas and Janson fight, making Taylor follow them. Teresa sees Taylor and they look at each other knowing they have to save Thomas. They are all stuck in one room together. Thomas sees that Janson shot him in the gut. Taylor goes to Thomas and kisses his forehead telling him, “we’re gonna help.” Her and Teresa come up with a plan to distract Janson. As Teresa takes charge of the plan and Taylor goes to Thomas to help him out, Janson almost kills Teresa but Taylor and Thomas throw a chair into a lane of glass, releasing two turned workers. Those things kill Janson and with Taylor and Teresa assisting Thomas make it to the rooftop. The aircraft by Jorge and Vince await them there. Thomas helps Taylor get on board first and then Thomas leaving Teresa last. Teresa is about to get on with Taylor’s help as the building collapses, “no!” Taylor and Thomas scream as Taylor tries to grasp Teresa’s hand. Teresa falls to her death. 

The group reunites with the immune and the right arm. They arrive at a safe haven that was revealed by Ava. Its where the rest of the population can live safely. 

That night as Taylor sits by the ocean she feels a paper in her pocket. “What in the world?” She takes it out and unfold it revealing to be the picture that Taylor drew of Newt. “He kept it all this time?” Taylor whispered to herself as tears started to come out. She sees her drawing and as she turns it over she sees that Newt drew her a picture, its of them laying in the tall green grass, smiling and holding hands There is a note there and it says, “To my beautiful friend, you have made my life the best, you have made me feel nothing else but joy. For that I want you to live your life, go anywhere and start your adventures. Remember how I said I would go anywhere with you, well its still true. Wherever you are at this moment, I am there with you, you may not see it but its true. So have fun my beautiful Tay, thank you for having my back and for making me feel like I can do anything. You deserve all the best, I am so proud of you Taylor. Also, you were always my rainbow hanging over my head.” Taylor kissed the letter and dried her tears. “Thank you Newt,” she whispers as the waves crash lightly in the sand and the sun begins to go down.

Taylor goes to where they are carving the names of those who they lost and she pats Minho’s shoulder as he carves out Newt’s name. Taylor kisses her fingers and pats his name, she does the same when she sees Chuck’s and Winston’s name. She grabs the carving tools herself and carves out Jessica’s name, smiling when she finishes it. 

Taylor goes to the group of the others and hugs them, hugging Minho, Frypan, Brenda, even Gally. “I wanted to say, thank you for all that you have done, Gally. I forgive you.” She pats Gally and Gally thanks her. “And I know Chuck forgives you as well.” Taylor says as she smiles. She takes her seat next to Brenda and Thomas arrives hugging everyone. Thomas sits next to Taylor and Taylor grabs his hand kissing it. Thomas smiles and kisses her on the lips. 

He then kisses her forehead and whispers, “I love you so much Tay.”

Taylor chuckles and laces her fingers with his, “I love you more...my Thomas.”

20 Years from that

“Mommy, mommy, c’mon lets go see the fishies,” Taylor’s son called out to Taylor as she ran to him. Standing by the ocean was her husband, Thomas smiling. The others were there as well, there kids present. 

“Wait up Newt! Mommy can’t go that fast!” Taylor chuckled as she ran to grasp her son’s hand and then her husbands. As they walk in the sunset the breeze is nice and cool and Taylor places a hand on her stomach, “I can’t wait to see you soon Chuck, mommy’s excited.” Thomas kisses his son and kisses her stomach and her forehead. “Daddy’s excited too, c’mon lets go see the ocean, I think there’s also a rainbow there.”

Taylor smiles and her family, the family that means everything to her, they walk away going on with more discoveries and more loving adventures. 

Tag list: @harrington-lover, @angelgl16, @perfectlybeautifulsuit, @hyehoney, @wtfisalltherandoms, @haven-prelude (wont let me tag), @leasly, @totally-alexa21, @creamy-pasta-boi, @multireese, @fanfictionrecommendations-com, @prentisskelley, @malereaderforkpop (wont let me tag), @guardian-of-cookies, @justafangirl-97, @teenageshitposts (wont let me tag), @andreaoreas, @dippergravity (wont let me tag), @some-booty, @fromfoolishpeopletodeadpeople, @collectiveyou

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[natsuxlucyfanfiction]

Superhero Part 2

Hey guys, what’s good? I saw that a couple of you wanted a second part to Superhero so here it is. Your comments are super encouraging, I seriously love reading them. For real, the more the merrier. Make sure to read the end note on this too, please.

Also, I have a Halloween one shot planned but I want you guys to choose what the Fairy Tail cast dresses up as. Either comment, leave an ask, or private message me what you guys want our gang to represent!

*********

Sighing, she headed towards the place she dreaded the most that day. Lucy was always the last person to get to their table since her class was always released late. Seeing all of her friends at the table made her want to do a 180 and bolt out of the cafeteria. But she didn't need to. She was stopped before even making it to her table.

"Lucy, you blowing me off?" She turned around to see Natsu with his lunch in hand. "And here I thought we were gonna have lunch together."

Lucy’s shoulders slumped in relief. Once again, Natsu saved her from an uncomfortable situation. She knew she couldn't avoid confrontation forever, but delaying it just a little bit wouldn't hurt. He led her to a bench outside near the entrance of the school, which was surprisingly empty. The only other person outside was a student taking pictures of shadows, which Lucy assumed was for a photography class.

"It's so nice out here," Lucy commented. "Why do people not sit out here more often?"

"We can," Natsu shrugged, popping a grape into his mouth. "It can be our little lunch spot."

"I doubt either of our friend groups would be okay with that," Lucy sighed. The thought was nice, but it was too unrealistic to be true. Keeping friends in middle school is so hard; why are there a bunch of dumb unspoken rules and codes and stuff?

"Who cares what your friends think?" Natsu countered. "First of all, your friends are so toxic, Britney Spears is shook. Wendy and Levy are fine but Lisanna And Cana? Don't get me started. They might not be completely bad people but all I know is that they're bad for you."

"Preaching to the choir," Lucy groaned in response. She took another bite of her sandwich, which Natsu was not-so-secretly eyeing. "Just take it already," she said, handing it over to him while rolling her eyes.

"Thank you so much Lucy, I'm freaking starving," he managed to say with his stuffed mouth.

"Why don't you just pack more?"

"I never wake up early enough so I just steal someone's lunch box every day," Natsu admitted casually. "They never figure out it's me cuz I steal a different person's lunchbox everyday. Once, I even brought my own lunchbox to school and pretended to steal it so I would look extra innocent, but then i remembered it was empty so I stole someone else's lunchbox too." Natsu tapped his head with a dumb smirk, believing himself to be the genius of his era.

"How did you go from wise monk to dumbest moron in such a short amount of time?"

"Rap music."

Lucy let out an exasperated groan, half jokingly. "It's like I don't even know you anymore," she complained. "I do but I don't, you know?"

"A good superhero never reveals his identity," Natsu saluted to the flagpole. "Rest well, America."

"Middle school boys are an enigma," Lucy stated, shaking her head in disbelief. It was Natsu's random quirkiness that she loved and missed, though. Somehow, it was the same Natsu but also someone completely different. They haven't gone through the same experiences throughout middle school like they did in elementary. Their storyline wasn't identical anymore.

Natsu and Lucy spent lunch together for the rest of the school year. Once freshman year began, they continued being their own squad. They had their friends, of course. Every so often Gray and/or Erza would hang out with them. Occasionally Wendy and Levy. Lucy grew distant with her friend group.

That was, until homecoming season rolled up.

Freshman girls were in a frenzy, fervently searching for the absolute most perfect dress for the homecoming dance. All of them were under the impression that they were definitely going to get asked, which was not necessarily true. At all.

"Come on, Lucy. You're not even a little bit excited about homecoming?" Levy tried to hype Lucy up more about boys. She hoped every time she came to school that it would be the day Gajeel asked her to homecoming. He hadn't yet, but he still had two weeks left to ask.

"I am, I just don't care about all this dating stuff. I'm going to go to homecoming, dance with my friends, then go home and play video games with Natsu. I'm excited for that."

"Okay, okay, sounds good, just gonna make a few tweaks," Levy said. "How about this: you and Natsu go as a couple, stay the entire night, go somewhere romantic afterwards, have your first kiss, and then go home and think about him all night!”

Lucy blinked twice, then pinched her arm. "Woah, this isn't a dream. It's real. You actually think that Natsu and I have something romantic going on between us? Gajeel's making you loosen a couple screws up there.” Lucy gestured to Levy’s head.

"Very funny, Lucy," Levy retorted drily. "I'm trying to help you. One day, you're gonna realize you're all alone and cry because you wouldn't listen to me."

"I'm 14, chill," Lucy chuckled. She spotted Natsu in the distance and used that as an excuse to leave the conversation. He was with his friends. She strided towards them, not mentally prepared to be stopped by another one of her friends to talk about homecoming. Though, what Levy said did repeat in her mind.

I couldn't date Natsu, right? He's literally like a brother to me. There's no chemistry between us. It's not possible. Is it? Well it doesn't matter, because I don't like him, so take that Levy!

She reached Natsu's friends, and she soon realized that she had jumped from one conversation about homecoming to another.

"Stop teasing the girls and just ask one of them to homecoming already."

"Gray, do you know how hard it is when I have every girl to pick from? I wanna ask them all, and I know all of them would say yes," Loke exaggerated, making sure to flip his hair at the end of the sentence.

"So you guys are planning on asking girls to homecoming?" Lucy stepped in.

"Nope, just Loke," Natsu answered. "Anyway, what's good with you?"

"Well, I-"

"Never mind shut up the Tartaros kids are coming this way," Natsu spoke quickly. Lucy swiveled around to see Jackal strutting over along with the rest of his posse. They were jerks, straight up mean to everyone with no clear reason. Even the seniors were wary of that group of sophomores. Never had the Tartaros kids ever spoken directly the Natsu or Lucy, but they've heard stories. None of them ended well.

"Lucy Heartfilia," Jackal bellowed, making sure to capture everyone's attention. "Will a drop-dead beautiful, angelic woman such as yourself grace me with the honor of coming to homecoming with me?" His words were laced with high levels of sarcasm, and his short giggle afterwards told Lucy all she needed to know: it was a joke. She struggled enough with self image issues, as did most girls in her age. A stunt like this made her confidence drop and tears rise. Am I that bad that someone would ask me out as a joke? However, she wouldn’t show Jackal that he bothered her, not that easily.

"I don't know...get your teeth fixed, then we'll talk." Lucy smirked at her own insult, knowing that she hit one of Jackal's insecurities. With jacked up, sharp teeth like that, who wouldn't be self-conscious?

His menacing glare gave her goosebumps, as if setting off little bombs across her skin. She just noticed how he towered over her. Not only that, but seeing his lips curl into a sneer and white-knuckled fists ready to pound into her made her want to flee the scene. “I get dared to ask you to homecoming and you try to turn this on me?! Get one thing straight," he seethed, spit flying into Lucy's face. "The purpose of this was to humiliate you, not me! Don't go thinking you've turned the tables. I’m not getting rejected by a girl like you.”

Natsu pulled Lucy away from the sophomore. "One little comment and you explode," Natsu said while pushing Jackal with the back of his hands. "Now you stay away from my homecoming date before you eat dust," Natsu threatened with thin patience. His fire matched Jackal’s. He didn’t let the height difference or Jackal’s undefeated streak waver his confidence.

"Threatening me, little boy?" Jackal scoffed, pushing Natsu back in the same way. Many people had their phones out, snapchatting the entire thing. "Show me what your daddy couldn't teach ya."

Lucy grabbed Natsu’s arm right as he lunged for Jackal. She couldn’t see his face, but she knew Natsu was livid beyond belief. Lucy wouldn’t be able to live with herself if Natsu got destroyed in a fight because of her. “Please, Natsu. Not this time.” Lucy heard Natsu slowly release a huff of air through his nose, like a dragon trying to control his anger. He honored her plea and dropped the fight before it could begin. Once the Tartaros crew left, Natsu erupted.

“Lucy, he totally deserved it!” He roared, pacing around with his hands on his head to release steam. “You heard what he’s done to others, and now he disrespected you! I say death penalty.”

“If anyone believes that Jackal needs a fist to the face more than you, it’s me.” She grabbed his hands and rubbed them, slowly intertwining hers with his. “I’ll be okay, Natsu. No big deal, really. Not like he actually hurt me or anything.”

“I promise you, Lucy,” he spoke with sincerity and passion, “I will give you the best homecoming experience that I possibly can. You are an actual queen and only deserve the best. Don’t tell yourself otherwise, you hear me?”

“Loud and clear,” Lucy smiled. Everything would always be alright in the end. Her superhero would make sure of it.

*******

Okay, I usually don’t add end notes but I felt like this was important. What Jackal did might not seem like a big deal to you, but honestly, a stunt like that could really kill a girls self esteem. I know many girls in many points of life and most of them still struggle with self confidence issues. Please, never ironically ask someone out or ironically compliment someone. Be genuine or just leave that person alone. Of course, it’s a different story if you’re friends with that person and that’s how you joke around, but generally, let’s keep it real and positive, please. Support our sisters!