#touch starved i guess

[wormstacheangel]

Dean and Cas in Motel6

The sun was shining through the motel window. Its glowing rays danced across Dean’s freckled back. A sight he never thought he would be privileged enough to see.

Dean asleep—drooling on the pillow even—naked and tangled up in motel sheets. Which was not the new part. No. The new and most amazing sight was that Cas was laying almost the same way. Except for the drooling since he did not sleep. And in this moment he thanked his lucky stars he didn’t. 

He couldn’t imagine missing even a second of Dean’s peaceful breathing. 

Oh, but he wanted to touch. His hands kept reaching over wanting to rake his fingers in soft brown hair or glide his hand down soft warm skin. His body ached to just be close to his best friend but he was still so hesitant. Dropping his hand between them but continued admiring the most beautiful man. 

His lover.

Cas almost chuckled but didn’t want to shake the bed. Dean would have cringed at that.

But wasn’t that true now? After this night, shouldn’t Cas be able to call Dean his?

“Stay.” Dean had begged last night. 

Cas remembered every detail, from the way Dean’s hands gripped to the way Dean panted his name. Even calling him Castiel once at some point. But he especially remembered Dean’s words.

“Fuck. I love you so much. Stay. Stay. Stay.”

Since being reunited they haven’t talked about his dying words or “The truth” as Sam likes to put it. Cas was brought back to resume business as usual. Except no Chuck and Jack was now the all-knowing. Which meant Cas was gone all the time with his son. 

He has not had a second of alone time with Dean, but he got a phone call last night. It wasn't a drunk call that made him drop everything and leave heaven behind. No, this was Dean's prayer.

“Come get me.”

It was all a strange whirlwind after that. 

He arrived at a motel, knocking once before being pulled in. He remembers the hesitant touching but the kissing was desperate for them both. Closing the gap between them so easily before falling into bed. 

And now it’s the morning and here they both are. 

He worried what Dean would say when he awoke. If this was all one big mistake. He wanted to prepare his heart for another goodbye and, even if this is all he gets, this wonderful night with Dean, then he will cherish it forever. 

He will pretend it never happened for Dean’s sake. For their family’s sake. 

But he knew he could never forget the warmth he felt finally being with the man he loves. 

Maybe he should leave before Dean wakes up. Save them both the trouble of an awkward conversation. 

He carefully scooted out of bed. Sitting at the edge of it, watching his bare feet on the filthy old carpet, debating whether or not to savor one last look at Dean before he left. 

“Unless you’re getting up to get me some damn breakfast,” Cas's back straightened as he heard the raspy voice. “You better get back in bed, Sweetheart."

Cas turned his head to see Dean lift up the sheets just enough to let him scoot in but not let the cold creep in. He smiled his sleepy grin and motioned with his chin to come close. Cas couldn't help but let the worries melt away as he slipped into the bed. Their bodies were close, it was almost electric as they kept an eye on each other. Looking for answers neither wanted to ask the questions too.

“Beautiful.” Cas thought at the same time as Dean said the word out loud. Only a whisper but still so confidently said. 

They both smiled as the tension faded. Their hands slowly crept between them before their pinkies hooked together.

Cas looked at their hands as he confessed. “I've been wanting this with you for so long. I…I never thought it was possible.” I never want to let go.

“Sorry it took me so long to get my head out of my ass.” He joked but his small smile was so sincere as he continued. “I was missing you like crazy. And I was trying to be patient and let you settle in with your whole new role as God's Dad and all but,” Dean slides his hand up Cas’s arm and gently places it on his cheek. Looking into his eyes, Cas saw no sadness. “I'm tired of wasting my time not being with you. You can…you have me, Cas. Always did.”

His eyes watered but he wouldn’t dare look away from the pretty face. He took Dean's hand and placed a kiss on his palm. He made sure Dean was listening to him before he let out a heavy breath. “I love you.”

He heard Dean's heart race and his breath hitched before he relaxed. Closing the space between them with a kiss. Long, sweet, and wonderful kiss. 

“After we make up for so much damn time,” Dean pulled Cas almost on top of him. “Maybe we can get that breakfast we were talking about earlier.”

“I wasn't talking about breakfast.” Cas chuckled, bending down to let his lips trace warm freckled skin. “But I do love the idea.”

“Great.” Dean pulled Cas’s face away from his throat and let their eyes lock. “You know I love you too, right?”

Cas couldn't respond but he felt like the Grinch and his grace grew two sizes that moment—though he knew it wasn’t possible, he just felt so happy. His eyes finally shed those tears he was holding in while he tucked his face into Dean’s chest. Feeling big, strong, and—best of all— gentle hands rub mindless circles into his back. 

Cas knew he was important. He knew he was wanted to some degree. But finally hearing those words, from someone he truly loves, felt healing in some way. How has he lived so long without being loved?

The motel room filled with a golden light of morning sun and soft humming from the man he loves. You could see every tear in the wallpaper, mold on the ceiling, and even how the carpet had different color stains but at this moment, it was the most beautiful place in the world. 

In this moment, he was truly in heaven.

[princeguri66]

Y'all ever get so heated that all you wanna do to calm down is to lay in someone's embrace?

Gaz x Male Reader

All fluff!

Ever think of going to Gaz after having a shitty day, where nothing went as they were supposed to. Your day was shit, waking up later than usual, getting chewed out, training didn't go well at all, some other soldier bumping into you at the mess hall making you spill some of your food on the ground and you just felt so drained and the cold environment did not help at all.

Stalking through the halls with your back tense with frustration. You can feel your jaw getting tighter and your brows furrowing as little bits of your day flashes in your mind. You walk around mindlessly as you try to think of a good way to de-stress, itching for the touch of a certain sergeant. And speak of the devil there he is.

You see Gaz being illuminated in the glow of the tv in front of him, the thin blanket wrapped around him making him look so much cozier. it's as if God was giving you a sign.

Gaz tore his eyes away from the telly to lock on to yours, seems like he noticed you, standing there all awkward. With a small quirk to his lips he beckoned you over with his hand, you immediately followed the order to sit next to him on the couch.

"Bad day?" He asks you, wrapping an arm around your stiff shoulders. You only grunt as an answer and relax into his hold, all the tension and frustration in your system melting away as he brings you closer to his side.

"Big guy just needed his cuddles after a long day, hmm?" He teased, you put all your weight onto him as a response. He's now stuck between the couch and you, effectively using your body to replace the thin blanket he had earlier.

You place your head between his pecs and he wraps his arms around you, gently stroking at your back, knowing that it helps you get more comfortable and just as he expects, you absolutely melt into the touch. Letting out content hums in the space between you. How easily you turned to putty in his embrace.

Gaz chuckles as he sees your brows unfurrow. Seems like you're getting quite comfortable there.

With a kiss to the top of your head he settles in, turning his head to face the tv once more but this time he has something infinitely better than that thin ass blanket.

[tennessoui]

thinking about a soulmate canon au where you find your soulmate via touch and the jedi order is a bit more pious and has a very respectful no touching culture that obi-wan absolutely abides by. meanwhile anakin is raised on tatooine before coming to the temple and he's really used to touch, and it drives him a little insane, that no one touches him casually in the temple but he learns to abide by it as well and follow his master's example

only for him to fall head over heels for padmé as soon as they touch in aotc and he thinks his reactions to her are due to them being soulmates so they get married because padmé doesn't really know what finding her soulmate feels like either, but anakin's touch and attention feels good (and maybe he unintentionally uses the Force to convince her) so they must be soulmates

meanwhile obi-wan saved his padawan's life when he was like sixteen and was knocked unconscious and tossed into an ocean or something so obi-wan gives him mouth to mouth to resuscitate him---and discovers instantly that they're soulmates....but anakin's out cold and doesn't feel it so obi-wan's left alone with the realization that he's some kind of monster, being the soulmate of a child and anakin can never ever ever know.

so canon happens as canon does but with obi-wan knowing and keeping this secret to himself and carefully making sure he never touches anakin while anakin gets all of his touches from his wife and obi-wan watches from afar knowing he can never tell anakin or anyone else

but palpatine works it out and definitely tells anakin once he's Fallen and killed his wife and also been barbecued (by his soulmate), which makes vader obsess with finding obi-wan (more than he is in canon)

and he finally captures him and has the acolytes chain him up in mustafar. vader visits and asks if obi-wan cut off his arms so he couldn't touch him and know, and it's obi-wan's worst fear and biggest regret that anakin finds out they're soulmates, but now he has no control over the situation. not as vader approaches, not as he takes off his helmet, not as vader leans close and brushes what remains of his lips against obi-wan's cheek

and it feels just as good and right and perfect as it did the first and only time they touched, except now obi-wan isn't sure who the monster is. maybe it's both of them

[in-a-mountain-pool]

Hi everyone, my name is Emily, and I am SO over the head!canon that Michael Gavey likes bimbofication, and I think it's a bit anti feminist, and weirdly not in character. But hey ho, everyone is allowed an opinion, I'm just feeling a bit icky about it today and I'm looking for reassurance that it's not only me~

[carlyraejepsans]

[insert pun about cuddling here]

[comebackali]

for our phantom menace rewatch this week we are doing a “qui gon touch count” to count how many times qui gon (bad) touches anakin

[donottouchredbutton]

i’d like to thank both skyrim and baldur’s gate 3 for doing for me what twilight never could

[stiffyck]

I've been bothering people with this in dms so much but that's not enough so I'm sharing my insanity here.

Scar who doesn't need physical touch. He's not exactly touch averse (tho you could see it that way), he just. Doesn't need the affection. He likes the occasional hand holding or a quick hug, but he also likes his personal space and freedom. Hugs and cuddles are too warm and too stifling and he needs his freedom for movement.

He's not sad about this. It's not anything tragic or awful. He likes the idea of cuddling and he loves seeing other people hug and cuddle. It's just not for him.

He also doesn't understand touch starvation. He's never experienced it and probably never will.

In 3rd life, in the desert. Grian noticing scar taking a step back when someone is standing too close, shying away from physical contact and never being the one to initiate it. He stops trying to touch scar, only when it's necessary.

He notices how much more comfortable scar looks after he stops giving him so much physical affection. But... this leads to grian maybe becoming a bit touch starved.

Grian telling scar in the desert he feels a bit touch starved and scar asking him what it means. Grian explains.

After that, grian notices scar holds his hands much more often. It's not much but it means the world to him.

Hermitshipping under the cut

Also. Comedic potential.

Let's take redscape for example (or scarian. Works both ways. Just imagine whichever ship you prefer sjcjdksk). Scar and mumbo start dating. But since scar can't really provide all the physical affection mumbo needs, he goes to grian. Mumbo gets cuddles and hugs from his best friend and he gets hand holding and occasional short kisses from his partner. It works for them.

Now imagine tho. The hermits thinking it's mumbo and grian who are dating. They will often see mumbo and grian cuddle or hug or hold hands. A lot of the times scar is even with them, but keeps distance a bit.

Sometimes scar holds mumbos hand, but that's about it.

It's actually scar and mumbo who are dating but they don't know that.

Or

The mumscarian option where they are all dating. Grian and mumbo get the affection they need from each other and scar is happy to just be with them.

Sometimes, when sleeping on the same bed, grian and mumbo will cuddle while Scar just holds one of their hands. Or not even the whole hand, just have their pinkies interwined.

Also scar definitely has a ton of plushies to hug close at night

[robinfollies]

me when i experience a loving embrace 💖

[coquelicoq]

post-canon every single member of kimcom likes to spoon kim dokja. nonsexually. it's just nice to know he's alive and there and feel his chest rise and fall within the circle of your arms. try to do something stupid now asshole. oh you can't? because of my octopus impression? that's right. take THAT. however i will make one exception for yoo joonghyuk. yoo joonghyuk may want to spoon kim dokja, but he never gets the opportunity because kim dokja wants to spoon him more. so the sleeping arrangement is yjh>kdj>all other kimcom members on rotation. actually i take it back there's one other household member who doesn't want to spoon kim dokja and it's yoo mia, but that's fine because she's one of the only people (besides kim dokja) who yoo joonghyuk would be comfortable spooning. so there's probably times when it's yma>yjh>kdj>today's lucky winner.

incidentally this is also the order for the doing-each-other's-hair train because while yoo mia WILL allow other people to do her hair, no one wants to because she always compares their skills unfavorably to her brother's. and she's really articulate about it. just utterly scathing. one time her criticism was so devastatingly, accurately incisive that she made lee hyunsung cry. yoo joonghyuk spooned him that night to cheer him up and yoo mia was so mad about it that lee hyunsung had to leave the country for a couple weeks. the household learned a valuable lesson that day. it's best not to disturb the delicate spooning/hair-train balance.

[nburkhardt]

This is what happens when I just start typing sometimes lol

There’s something so intimate about it. Something precious, something special and maybe that’s why it never happened to him.

Of all his memories, the only thing he can remember is pats on his shoulder or a quick hug. Maybe it happened when he was a baby, most babies get all the love, right? There’s gotta be something and he just doesn’t remember?

The girls he’s been with only ever kissed him back and never really did anything beyond lips and maybe once or twice on his cheeks. But for the most part? He’d start it and enjoyed it, really he did, but there’s something in the back of his mind crying, something breaking and hurting.

It’s okay, he’s fine, he doesn’t need it. He’ll enjoy the fact that he can give it to someone else. He can settle for pats on the shoulder, quick hugs and shoulder bumps.

Overtime though, all of it goes away. Soon the thing he craves most isn’t even an option for him to give. He’s alone and his closest friend is fourteen, only accepts high-fives and isn’t even close enough with him for hugs. It makes sense, he was just the random guy he so happen to run into and managed to drag into helping.

It’s fine, he’s fine.

His brain associates touch with hurt after 1984. There’s still a part of him deep down screaming and crying, but the rest of is afraid of touch now. He can’t bring himself to even shoulder bump with anyone, he sticks to staying close but not close enough to touch. Flinches away when he can’t see someone touch his shoulder, freezes when someone goes to high five and gets stiff with hugs.

It’s much, much, much worse after the Russians torture him.

By the end of July 85, he has a person. A soulmate and best friend wrapped up in one. All it took was almost dying together and saving the world, to find this one human that cares for him. She doesn’t touch though, she noticed it before everything went down. Noticed him flinching and freezing, it wasn’t hard to miss when they spent days together in Scoops. She smiles at him and when she does hug or pat his shoulder, she’s directly in front of him.

It works, he’s fine. The sometimes hugs and shoulder bumps, it’s fine. He doesn’t need it, doesn’t need touch. That part of him hidden beneath everything is silent crying, no longer screaming.

He swears he’s fine.

~~

I’m gonna write a second part but in eddie’s pov. This is steve’s pov btw I hope you caught that pretty early on lol

Touch-starved Steve is my favorite and it always hurts.

@i-less-than-three-you @artiststarme

[estrellami-1]

Soft Touch Baby

Pt 1 | Pt 2 | Pt 3 | Pt 4 | Pt 5 | Pt 6 | Pt 7 | Pt 8 | Pt 9 | Pt 10 | Pt 11 | Pt 12 | Pt 13 | Pt 14 | Pt 15 | Pt 16 | Eddie’s POV | Song | ao3

Eddie won’t stop looking at Steve now. “I’m not sure I wanna go back to the masks.”

Steve just shrugs. “I’m fine. I deal.”

“Bullshit,” Eddie says easily.

Steve’s world narrows down to that one word. Images, memories, flash through his head. Would’ve should’ve could’ve done something differently. But it’s too late. And she’s happy, and he’s happy for her, except—

He jolts as someone touches his arm. His eyes meet Eddie’s as he tries to control his breathing. “Shit, Steve,” Eddie’s saying. “Are you okay?”

“Fine,” Steve says, on autopilot, then abruptly stands. “I’m gonna-” he gestures vaguely upstairs.

Eddie stands too, hands out like he’s not sure what to do. Steve’s not sure what to do, either. “Steve…” he shakes his head, steps forward. Steve fights himself as he steps back, hates the look on Eddie’s face. Hates himself for the look on Eddie’s face.

“Sorry,” he murmurs, “I’m sorry, I’m fine, I’ll be… I’m gonna…”

“Steve,” Eddie says, and suddenly Steve thinks Eddie would be really good with animals. “Can I touch you?”

Steve bites his lip, looks away, crosses his arms, uncrosses them, nods. Eddie’s hands come into his field of view, slowly, like he’s trying not to scare Steve away, slowly, slowly, hands then arms then torso, and suddenly Eddie is hugging Steve and Steve is all but collapsing into it.

They sit on the couch together, Eddie’s arms still around Steve’s chest, and what should feel confining just feels comfortable. Steve forces himself to breathe normally. “Can I ask what that was about?” Eddie asks, his voice reverberating through his chest into Steve’s.

Steve takes a deep breath. Then another. Then says, “Nancy. She- when we-” he shakes his head. “It’s stupid.”

“It’s not,” Eddie says. “Not if it’s affecting you like this.”

“You’re starting to sound like Robin.”

“Then you’d better listen,” Eddie teases gently. “Cause you know Robin only wants the best for you.”

Steve sighs again. He can’t even argue with that. “When we broke up. That’s what she called me. Called…” he waved a hand around to signify that whole scenario, let his voice trail off and his hand drop. “So. I, uh. I hear that word, and it… reminds me of that.”

“Shit, Steve,” Eddie murmurs again, then suddenly freezes. “Wait, is it just that word? The two parts together? Or-”

Steve manages half a laugh. “You can say shit. It’s fine. Or bull. Just… together, it…”

“Got it,” Eddie nods. “Won’t say it.”

“But it’s stupid, I need to get over it-”

“Nope. Nuh-uh. Already erased from my mental dictionary. It’s no longer a word. What are we even talking about? There’s no word. Nothing there. Nope. What’s between, uh, bulls and bull… uh… whatever comes after that. There’s nothing between them.”

Steve’s laughing now, a real laugh that makes him feel weak, leaning further into Eddie’s arms. And Eddie’s laughing too, squeezing him a little, and even with the circumstances Steve doesn’t think he’s ever been so content.

“Thank you,” he murmurs when they both calm down. “That helped. A lot.”

“You’re welcome,” Eddie says happily. “You’re okay now?”

Steve grins wryly. “Still fucked in the head, but yeah. I think so.”

Eddie chuckles and leans back, still in Steve’s space but no longer holding him. “So, back to what we were talking about before. What kinda fucked in the head happened with the concussions?”

Steve shrugs. “Some things you’d expect. My memory’s pretty shit now. I get headaches, migraines sometimes. I can’t hear very well out of my left ear. I’ve learned to lip read, for the most part. It can be difficult in a crowded room sometimes, but it’s fine. I really am fine.”

Eddie smiles, shakes his head. “New normal?”

“New normal,” Steve agrees with a nod.

Eddie grins suddenly and stands. Steve mourns the loss of his touch, then immediately forces those thoughts back down. “So. We could go to bed.”

Steve raises a brow. “Or?”

“Or I could grab my lunchbox from the van.”

Steve laughs. “Think I’d prefer that option tonight.”

Eddie grins even wider and walks out, sauntering back in a minute later, lunchbox swinging from two fingers. “Get ready,” Eddie teases, and Steve laughs again.

“How much do I owe you?”

Eddie frowns like Steve had said elephants have purple polka dots. “Dude, no,” he says. “We’re getting high together.”

“Eds, c’mon, I know this stuff ain’t cheap.”

“Someone woulda smoked it anyways. Might as well be us. Tell you what, you find a lighter and we’re even.”

Steve looks at him, studies him for a second, then smiles and nods. “Deal.”

Pt 5

[lilac-udon]

[quackkaz]

Remus, on the phone : Hostage or not, sometimes it's just nice to be held.

Janus : WHERE THE F*CK ARE YOU?!

[skunkes]

what they dont tell you about being incredibly introspective is that you'll think you're done making realizations and then you'll just make more realizations always all the time forever

[parkitaco]

"Is Will your boyfriend?" Holly asks, and Mike immediately chokes on the lettuce in his mouth.

"Wh- what?" he gasps, dropping his fork and swallowing back the salad that suddenly feels like cement in his throat. Holly's looking at him with a strange expression, like she's trying to figure something out.

"Will. Is he your boyfriend?" she repeats, even though Mike very obviously heard her, and the question doesn't feel any less shocking the second time.

"No!" He yelps. "No, why would you think that?"

Holly shrugs, taking another bite of spaghetti like this is a normal conversation and she is not slowly killing him. "Nancy calls him your little boyfriend sometimes, and Mom says he's your person, which basically means the same thing, and you live together and act like a couple and unpack groceries together, and- I don't know. Seems like it could be a thing."

OR 

holly visits college roommates mike and will, and has a few important questions for them