#trainspotting headcanons

[philipjohnclapp]

Drop a request, I’m feeling frisky.

You can request AS MUCH AS YOU WANT IDC

(Check my pinned for what I’ll write for and if it isn’t there just request for whatever anyways, I’ll write anything no matter how immoral. Nothing is off limits REMEMBER THAT. Also stop asking if requests r open THEYLL be open forever no matter how old this post is.)

[huntingingoodwill]

sick boy headcanons part ii

masterlist

send requests for my 1.3k sleepover!

my other sick boy hcs :)

- simon, simon, simon… where should i begin!

- he loves buying you flowers! he’ll show up at your front door, whipping a slightly wilted, plastic wrapped bouquet from behind his back with his toothiest grin.

- there are often times he’s hanging out with mark and just stops in the middle of the street and is like “wait. i gotta go buy them flowers, im seeing them tonight.” and drags him into the nearest supermarket

- mark just flipping through random magazines begging him to hurry up while simon chooses the best bouquet. yeah it’s cheap but he wants the best for you! he chooses the freshest looking one every time, bringing them to you on the tube, biting the stems between his teeth as he fumbles for his card

- okay so sometimes money is tight. sometimes simon can’t really afford to blow his extra cash on store bought flowers. that’s fine! but he refuses to let you go without. he will literally drag mark to the fields to pick wildflowers for you, well, whenever he’s not shoplifting them, yelling at rents whenever he whines about it being too much trouble. he definitely steals flowers from your neighbour’s shrubs on the way to your house, showing up with a loose bouquet brimming with wildflowers, a huge smile, and a grumpy mark

- simon does not tolerate anybody treating you badly. he’ll retaliate, totally, and 100% gets an attitude, shoving and threats included, but his favourite method of solving these problems is of course: is to sic begbie on them like your guard dog

- someone spills a drink on you? your boss refuses to give you your promised pay? someone hits on you in a gross, disrespectful way? (knowing him, he probably gets mad at whoever hits on you even if it’s in the most respectful way possible) he’s all up in begbie’s ear whispering “did you see that guy? he’s totally staring at you. like, what’s his problem?” getting begbie to get super mad at them because he thinks they’re disrespecting him when it’s really all simon’s orchestration. this devolves into a fight of course, that simon watches with rapt amusement while holding his arm over your eyes to shield you from all the bloodshed

- simon is a movie stan. a buff.

- he loves bringing you to arthouse and theatres that play his favourite old movies :))

- his favourite era for film is the 60s. paul newman, alain delon, and of course, his celebrity crush: sean connery. they’re just all so suave, so cool, they’re all he wants to be!! you go to one movie with him and the next week he’s dressing like them and talking with that same quick cadence. you make fun of him for it endlessly but you’re lowkey into it

- youll sit next to him in matinees with your head on his shoulder and he can’t help but whisper little facts about the film to you every once in a while

- he probably brings a nerdy little notebook too to write details in

- mark tags along to a lot of the movie dates too i don’t make the rules

- and you and simon always bum off his popcorn which pisses him off but what’s he gonna do!

- besides going to the cinema, you two have movie nights every once in a while, watching whatever film is on tv or whatever he managed to rent that week at home together, legs kicked up on each other’s laps, eating takeaway

- he wouldn’t miss these movie nights for anything!! his friends will ask him out but he just goes “nah. cant. we’re watching goldfinger tonight.” or sometimes he’ll be out at the pub with the whole gang, and jump up suddenly, remembering he’s gotta go because taxi driver’s on at 9 and you’re waiting at home for him with food

- also because he’s a bond fanboy he takes you to every new movie!! though of course he’ll spend a good chunk of time on the bus ride home complaining about how no one can beat good ol’ connery

- also long, late night train and bus rides with him :( he always lets you fall asleep on his shoulder, and death glares at anyone who tries to sit next to you just in case it disturbs you

- he hardly wants to wake you up when you reach your stop, but watches as you rub your bleary eyes when he does. he thinks it’s cute :(

- late night walks with him, too!

- be it just simply from the train station home, or when you two can’t sleep and just need to take a late night walk. it’s just the two of you, and you spend your time just walking, the only sounds in the street being you talking

[mysadcorner]

Due to my exams I won’t be able to post properly until the end of June, but when I do I will be posting in bulk to make up for all the time lost and more :) Please send asks for when I come back ^^

[mossy-rot]

the choke hold enmu has on me is ridiculous. anyways I think he would have a trainspotting tiktok with the same energy as francis bourgeois

[drapopia]

la squadra headcanons

authors note: hello everyone! i've been dead for a while, but my la squadra fixation has once again returned, perhaps even stronger than ever. honestly, i'm not phased. but my brain has stronger, more coherent thoughts about this bushel of babes. enjoy, and my inbox is always open to thoughts!!

risotto

joined la squadra at age 21 shortly after his cousin's accident/incident.

he is egyptian and sicilian.

he is the leader of la squadra, and appointed gelato as his second in command due to his intelligence in the area of arranged killing and his general ability to command a room/read his teammates (with the help of his stand, of course)

risotto may be slightly standoffish, but he truly does care for his team. he is also a natural worrier, and tends to check in with them often. whether it be strict business, or just in general keeping up.

his sclera are tattooed because of his stand's general changing of his appearance and his eyesight. after the gradual change of his whites, he decided to jump the hurdle and get it professionally blacked out.

considers himself to be on good terms with everyone on the team, but gets along best with formaggio. he appreciates that formaggio is spunky, and makes him chuckle to himself.

loves to draw, and has a notebook in his room of nonsensical drawings. one of ghiaccio's greatest treasures is a drawing risotto did for him after an especially bad morning (he accidentally left his car windows open during an entire night of rain without his knowledge) it's of a cat on a park bench! it is framed and on his dresser

his favorite ice cream flavor is either double chocolate, or raspberry.

he wants to learn how to ride a motorcycle so badly, but is scared of being too big and crashing. he knows how to ride a bicycle, it's just hard to find something that adequately fits his body.

his favorite genres of music are goth (duh), metal, and shoegaze. he wants to feel the bass in his feet. has gotten into several (mostly) lighthearted arguments over the punk rock scene with formaggio and gelato

he sleeps in a tanktop and extremely large sweatpants. he wears socks while he sleeps, an abysmal sight. he does have some trouble sleeping at night, but once he's out, he lays stiff as a plank. his thoughts before he goes to bed are of the general day, and random thoughts. often times he will remember something random, like he forgot to switch clothes from the washer to the dryer, and will bolt up and ruin his sleepy groove. (we're all guilty risotto, it's okay)

his favorite movies are the exorcist, carrie, and trainspotting. he likes most movies, but he HATES jaws. it makes him viscerally upset to think of the way sharks are treated because of these movies

prosciutto

he joined la squadra shortly after illuso, did, still one of the first to be initiated. he joined because he it was just the family business, it was why his father had moved his entire family to the country. while he doesn't consider it to be in his blood by any means, he finds it is remarkably easy for him to take on the role of a mafioso.

originally born in prague, his family immigrated to italy when he was around 4 years old. so while he grew up in florence, he had strong czech influence in his childhood

he feels like he should be the one in the team that people should feel inclined to go to for advice. he also thinks he's mysterious and seductive, and while he has an air of confidence and and elegant stride, the others have all seen him standing in his bathrobe screaming at the espresso machine for not working (it's not plugged in prosciutto.)

despite seeing him at his goofiest, the others on the team know that they can go to him for a lot of stuff that needs help. after all, he's the best marksman on the team and taught melone how to shoot. he's also the best to go to for advice on high end stuff.

his favorite genres of music are big band music, jazz, and psychedelic rock. he also loves blues and some occasional soul.

he used to have his bellybutton pierced for an entire year, but he almost had it ripped out on a job, so he had it retired.

he is a surprisingly good cook, and makes a mean roast pork, and knows exactly how long to bake a good sourdough bread to get a pleasantly crispy exterior. also, he somehow learned how to make an absolutely delectable hummus, and will not tell anyone how he knows. (prosciutto, spill your secrets, you devilish man!)

his favorite flavor of ice cream is either plain vanilla bean or coffee. would much rather have a pastry of some sort, but he gives in too quickly for anyone to believe that he hates sweets.

he sleeps in silk jammies, with no socks on. he is serious about his bedtime, and hates whenever people interrupt his sleep time. his thoughts before bed are similar to risottos, going through the day meticulously. he also thinks about his errands for the next day, often stopping to think of his grocery list for the coming day or so.

he does not exercise often, only opting to do some light walking, and uses the small personal gym that la squadra owns occasionally. has a freaky fast metabolism

his favorite movies include overboard, the man who fell to earth, and what ever happened to baby jane?

gets along best with sorbet. regularly lament over old man things, even though sorbet is substantially older than him. the stingy old bastards are fond of sitting on the veranda outside and mocking each other

pesci

pesci was the last to join la squadra, and joined because of pressure from his family, and low income from his family back in prague.

he is prosciutto's cousin, and immigated to italy with prosciutto's family when he was around 2. his family was in dire straits, and could not afford to provide for themselves, let alone pesci. he is still in contact with them, and regularly sends most his income to them. he hopes that they're doing better.

he is very unsure of his abilities as an assassin, and of his abilities in general. he has so many good traits though! illuso would never admit it, but he finds himself spending a good chunk of his socializing talking to pesci because he's so personable. he has good advice outside of work, and prosciutto is proud of him for being a good source of wisdom. (even if it's just for pesci knowing where the best place to fish is.)

pesci has tattoos! (and he also gets bitches!) he has the third most tattoos out of anyone on the team. his most special one is an intricate vine piece on his thigh representing his journey from prague to italy. only prosciutto and ghiaccio know that though. his second most fond piece is a petite tattoo of a turtle on a skateboard that he got on a night out with formaggio and melone. does not regret it whatsoever.

pesci's favorite genres of music are surf rock, pop, and a bit of hip- hop! he loves a good surf guitar.

his favorite ice cream flavor is mint chocolate chip, proud defender until he passes

pesci is BUFF, let's get that out of the way. he, formaggio, ghiaccio, and risotto often work out together. he thinks it's genuinely so fun, and loves that good content feeling after a rewarding session. he spots for ghiaccio, and risotto spots for him. (formaggio HATES lifting weights)

gets along best with everyone, but he does have a soft spot for gelato. gelato was worried about pesci's adjustment to mafia life, and checks in with him personally. whether this is lunch at a local thai restaurant, or just a chat while brushing their teeth at the sink in the base. pesci often feels incompetent next to prosciutto, so he appreciates gelato's encouragement.

makes a mean baklava, like is such a good baker

he sleeps in comfy jammies, and no socks. such a deep sleeper, will not wake up even for the apocalypse at his door. does not remember falling asleep at all, so no coherent thoughts are really going through his head while he drifts off for the night.

his favorite movies are steel magnolias and uncle buck, loves john candy almost reverently

illuso

was the next to join after sorbet and gelato were assigned to risotto's team. is a former mercenary for hire from argentina. he emigrated from argentina to multiple different countries, but stuck in italy because he got into some trouble with passione. nothing too serious, he paid his debt, but he vibes with mafia life.

south american and italian!

illuso wouldn't admit that he gets along with anyone in la squadra, he enjoys teasing them a little too much to ever admit that out loud. he is an avid gossiper, and tends to bond with everyone in the group because of this. he's an information fiend, and this reflects in his work.

illuso's room is a calculated mess, and it is BEAUTIFUL. a comfy bed draped in luxurious blankets and throw pillows, extravagant rugs and lush carpeting, and ambient lighting that makes you instantly relax. he loves shoplifting, and uses his stand to his advantage. he used to steal jewelry from his grandmother when he was a child, and you can find it draped over a lamp or two.

for workouts, he loves pilates. (pilates princess all the way). he will occasionally join melone to work out, but that's just code for jogging on the treadmill and talking shit lol. melone tries to cajole him into yoga, but illuso ate shit stretching once and his ego was bruised

his favorite genres of music include psychedelic rock, pop, disco, and hip-hop. he occasionally enjoys metal, but he has to be in a very specific mood or else it just gives him a migraine. he just loves some sensual music that makes you wanna lounge on a love seat dramatically

has a smattering of ear piercings, his favorite is his conch piercing. formaggio is trying to convince him to get his nipples pierced, but illuso hates needles. he especially doesn't want needles near his sensitive bits.

his favorite ice cream flavor is either blueberry cheesecake, or bubblegum. not bubblegum with huge chunks, but just the flavoring.

of all the people on the team, he is closest to either melone or formaggio. being partners with formaggio is comfortable, and puts him at ease whenever they're on the job. formaggio can reciprocate his crude and teasing humour, so they mesh well. they watch trashy soap operas together. he can't explain why he and melone get along so well together, only that they're both smarmy bitches.

wears silk jammies to bed, and sleeps with a silk eye mask as well. has his hair in a bonnet, and has a complicated bed setup. he is a light sleeper, and sleeps in the mirror world to reduce the risk of being woken up super easy. his thoughts before going to bed are of things he wants to buy, and an uneven flow of things that happened that day.

has skin care nights with ghiaccio and melone, or anyone else that wants to join. risotto and formaggio join occasionally

his favorite movies are black christmas and girl, interrupted.

formaggio

formaggio joined after ghiaccio, so right in the middle! he fell into the mafia, and was originally a part of polpo's squad after gelato was reassigned to risotto's squad. after polpo discovering how useful and destructive formaggio's stand ability was, he was reassigned to risotto's squad.

if you want fun and some healthy emotional balancing out, formaggio is your guy! he is the one on the team who the others go to for some fun and laughs. while he is a calculated and malicious killer, he is also very lazy and loves a good nap.

spanish and italian, his mother is from spain and his father is from genoa, italy.

he has the second most tattoos of anyone on the squad. while some are emotionally rooted, like the heart tattoo of his mom's name, some are for goofs, like an american traditional pinup of a woman with a cat tail. (formaggio what are you telling us)

his cat is named amoreena, and he is exceedingly fond of her. he used to have two cats, amoreena and cecilia, but cecilia passed away from a urinary tract infection. at the time of his death, he was actively looking for a kitten for amoreena to bond with. that is why she seems so agitated, she's just a sad girl at the moment (and formaggio shoved her into a damn bottle LMAO)

his favorite genres of music are soft rock, blues rock, and punk! he loves himself some music that reminds him that he's a tough guy and that he is rough and tumble! is a sucker for some celine dion and cher though

formaggio makes his own clothes from punk diys, and is very proud of his fashion. sticks very true to punk ideals and tries not to consume what fashion he could just make himself. definitely owns crust pants lol

as stated before, he regularly works out with pesci, ghiaccio, and risotto. he's mainly a cardio guy, and some light agility based stuff. i don't believe he likes weight lifting mainly because he hates how his arms ache a little the next day. he finds it irritating, and just generally agitating. my mans also loves jump roping

his favorite ice cream flavor is chocolate and cookies and cream! will genuinely eat any flavor though, he is not picky by any means, he loves food

is such a good cook, i am being so serious right now. his food has that home cooked and feel good taste, one bite will have you pleasantly smiling. he will casually say "let me make something super quick" and make the most mouthwatering, delectable meal known to man. he used to get put on timeout often when he was a kid, and spent that time watching his momma make food from his seat at the table.

formaggio considers himself a fan of everyone on the team! sure, ghiaccio may be prickly, and illuso can be a little too catty sometimes, but he vibes well with everyone. if you forced him to choose, it would be either gelato or pesci. he thinks they're both fun and down to earth, and he admires that they know who they are pretty well!

he sleeps shirtless with some boxers or lounge pants. his bed, to put politely, is kind of a mess. he snores, and he is also a deep sleeper. his thoughts before he goes to bed are goofy, like "i wonder if prosciutto has ever pissed himself" or "is ghiaccio's hair naturally that color?" also thinks about things he said that day, or he could have done differently.

his favorite movies are jurassic park and interview with the vampire (don't ask him why, he'll just talk about how sexy antonio banderas is)

melone

melone joined after formaggio, and before pesci. he joined the mafia as a means to pay for his university tuition, but got in way too deep and lost much more than he ever imagined he could,

melone knows the nature of his stand is offputting, a reflection of his mind that he tends not to reflect upon. however, he does find that despite that, his relationship with the others is well off. they come to him with strange questions that they know melone would have the best answer for. he is the only one on the team with a higher education. (highest being melone, lowest being sorbet).

korean and italian! his mother is korean, while his father was born in florence. he was raised in florence, but he visited korea with his mother every year or so for the summer. he feels very in touch with his roots on both sides.

melone has his nipples pierced! he has one tattoo, a small gene sequence of his grandmother on the inside of elbow. besides this, i don't believe he has any more body mods. he likes to make his fashion more flashy instead.

he is most fond of ghiaccio on the team, they mesh well. ghiaccio and he spend so much time talking about such strange topics, and he doesn't get offended by ghiaccio's frustrated and impassioned outbursts. he finds them endearing, actually. melone is a naturally levelheaded person, so ghiaccio appreciates him for that. they can be caught playing games on their nintendo 64 at 3 am

i don't believe that melone is a sexually oriented person, if that makes sense. i think he's someone who believes very strongly in sexuality being an inherent part of the human experience, whether you feel it or not. he thinks nudity is natural, and being a person is naked! we are all born naked, and we leave the world just as naked when we decay. (in the manga, he isn't as much of a pervert as the anime portrays him). he is a very logical person, but his spiritual beliefs are wide and varied. he shares them with ghiaccio and have conversations frequently with him about culture and their views on things similar to sexuality, natural expression, etc.

don't get me started on how his stand is a small reflection on trans parenthood

he does workout, and he does mainly yoga and pilates. he likes to stay toned and fit, not overly muscly. he workouts mainly with illuso and ghiaccio. ghiaccio tries to make him lift weights and he gets fussy.

his favorite genres of music are r&b, bedroom pop, and anything sensual! he loves him some britney spears. he also dabbles in techno and perv digital. (he likes the sound)

his favorite flavors of ice cream are strawberry and lemon! he prefers a nice melty sherbet.

he has only purple lights in his room, and he wants to own a ferret.

owns extremely expensive hygiene products, just like illuso

sleeps naked lol, likes to let his body breathe. (again, firm believer in casual, non-sexual nudity) he likes to meditate before he goes to bed, and has a nice linen bedspread and fluffy pillows. has similar thoughts to formaggio before he goes to bed, like "hmm, should i buy a fish tank?... probably not." drools SO MUCH

favorite movies are suspiria and phantom of the paradise

ghiaccio

joined la squadra after illuso, was officially inducted into the squad after a disastrous turn of events after dropping polpo's lighter and killing multiple people. with the destructive ability of his stand, it made sense to assign him to risotto

ghiaccio finds it hard to control his temper and be a welcoming person. he resents that he can be so anal-retentive about stuff. thankfully, most of the team just accepts it as part of ghiaccio. they know that he's just.... very passionate about stuff. however, ghiaccio is very knowledgeable about most topics along with melone, so anyone can go to him about the most random thing and he will probably know. he also has good workout tips!

he is italian and he is very, very proud, don't get that mixed up.

has no tattoos, but he has his ears pierced. he just doesn't think he would look that appealing with tattoos. and no, he doesn't mean appealing to others, he could care less about what others think about his appearance. he just doesn't believe he could be truly comfortable with something on his body for the rest of his life.

ghiaccio gets along the easiest with risotto and sorbet! risotto took him under his wing whenever he entered the criminal underworld, and he internally thanks him every day. sorbet is also very caring towards him, doing for him what gelato is doing for pesci. sorbet is levelheaded and solemn, and can keep ghiaccio's temper where it needs to be, and assessing where that feeling is coming from. risotto and ghiaccio also love metal, so it's a funny pairing (tiniest on the team and the tallest on the team)

ghiaccio's favorite ice cream flavors are green tea and lemon. he prefers sorbet, but those two flavors together are heaven to him. he once tried a limoncello cake ice cream and he went bonkers. (this actually exists in america guys, it's in most chain stores, PLEASE TRY IT, it's limited edition)

workouts so much, with literally everyone! loves cardio, and is extremely in shape. he uses it as an outlet for pent up energy. he's like a cup of water with energy, it keeps filling up so he has to drain it using excess means.

collects books about his favorite topics, and regularly watches lectures online about culture and linguistics.

LOVES LINGUISTICS, he knows three languages fluently !

his favorite genres of music are glam rock, some bedroom pop, and METAL. he loves metal because risotto introduced it to him when he was formative, and now we have this amalgam of music.

ghiaccio sleeps with a band shirt too big for him and some lounge pants. his thoughts before sleep range from "oh my god that is the most embarrassing thing I have ever done, please stop brain" or "wow ghiaccio you are so smart and funny and everybody on earth wants to give you a smooch to show that you are the coolest boy ever!!" and sorbet and risotto give him an award. he sleeps the earliest and wakes up the latest out of the team.

his favorite movies are the dark crystal, what's eating gilbert grape, and poltergeist.

sorbet and gelato

first guys to join the team! they were both first on polpo's team as reconnaissance and information, but gelato switched over to risotto's team. at polpo's reluctance, he allowed sorbet to go with as well. both joined the mafia to find something. sorbet joined because he thought it was the last thing he would do, gelato joined after the military. they found one another, and the rest is history. both were late teenagers.

gelato is belarusian, and sorbet has no clue of his ancestry because of lost adoption records. he suspects he is italian and some asian descent.

as second in command, gelato is sought after for advice and direction commonly. his job is to keep the risotto's schedule and jobs for everyone bundled together, and to keep everyone else's shit together. as a bubbly guy, leadership comes naturally to him, although he doubts that often. sorbet may not have a leadership position, but he does have seniority over all in the squad, seeing as how he has been in passione longer than a lot of them have been alive even.

as of being fond of anyone in the team, they are biased towards one another. they are a package deal, and everyone is aware. if you see sorbet, gelato is lurking close by, and vice versa for sorbet. otherwise, gelato is closest to formaggio because they're both lighthearted guys with superstitious hearts! as for sorbet, he is closest to prosciutto or risotto. gelato and sorbet both have a fondness for ghiaccio, he's so pumped up!

sorbet will only eat plain vanilla ice cream, and gelato loves strawberry!

gelato loves cooking! sorbet is so bad at it <3

sorbet collects knives, and gelato collects old vintage vinyls, especially the ones with vintage sexy music lol.

sorbet and gelato take dual self defense lessons in lieu of working out. they also do martial arts lessons, and regularly teach everyone as best they can, or if the other members ask. sorbet also sticks to weight lifting, and gelato does cardio mostly.

for music, these two like different things. gelato is a pop fan! he's fond of 80's pop mainly, but he also rolls with psychedelic rock if he's feeling nostalgic for his younger days. sorbet prefers jazz and blues. the best way to describe it is lower class songs that remind you that everyone is just a normal common person. (examples: tom waits, johnny cash, warren zevon, the talking heads, dolly parton)

sorbet sleepwalks, and gelato splays out on the bed like a ragdoll. neither of them are the type to remember what they thought about before they slept.

their favorite movies include the rocky horror picture show, the labyrinth, possession (1981) and 9 to 5.

[soc69]

Books I’d recommend based on your favourite Hazbin hotel character:

Angel dust: (sorry his recommendations aren’t too plentiful, I know he’s a lot of people’s favourite but I just don’t think of him as being an avid reader so I haven’t attached him to a lot of books.)

- Obviously there’s The Godfather trilogy but anything by Mario Puzo I would also recommend for the Italian mafia links

- Giorgio Bassani’s The Gold Rimmed Spectacles (yes, it’s because it’s both Italian and gay, stfu)

- Confessions of a Mask by Yukio Mishima

- The Ragged Trousers Philanthropists

- Naked Lunch William S. Burroughs

- Trainspotting by Irvine Welsh (I’m sorry I had to, it’s got drugs)

Husk: woof, do I have a lot of suggestions for him! I headcanon him as an avid reader and the time that he would have been alive is my absolute favourite literary period, so, here we go.

- ANYTHING by Charles Bukowski

- Anything by Ernest Hemingway

- Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck

- On The Road by Jack Kerauc

- Queer by William S. Burroughs

- The Stranger by Albert Camus

- Diary of an Oxygen Thief (don’t come for me there has to be a reason he’s in hell)

- The Gambler by Fyodor Dostoyevsky

- The Master and The Margarita by Mikhail Bulgakov

- The Double by Fyodor Dostoyevsky

- Down and Out in London and Paris by George Orwell

- Another Country by James Baldwin

- Giovannis Room by James Baldwin

- Stoner by John Williams

I could just go on and on with this one so I’m gonna have to leave this here.

Alastor:

- obviously anything by Fitzgerald because he is the king of swing

- Streetcar Named Desire by Tennessee Williams

- The Great God Pan by Arthur Machen (I think he’d find the plot to be a great source of inspiration)

- Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoyevsky

- American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis (I had to)

- Nausea by John Paul Satre

- Tender is The Flesh by Augustina Bazterrica (obviously I had to include some cannibalism)

- No Longer Human by Osamu Dazai

- Trust by Hernan Diaz

- i also feel like he’d be a big Daphne Du Maurier fan and i base this on absolutely nothing

(I will gladly continue with the other characters if people actually want that because this is so fun for me)

[cannibal-nightmares]

howdy, im cannibal-nighmares, i am/was/am a professional artist, amateur music critic, and literary hobbyist. I draw professor franken stein from soul eater quite a lot. I do not have a consistent-enough temperament to describe myself in words, but my principles remain the same: Do no harm, take no shit.

sometimes i post about the lived schizophrenic experience. i post entirely for the purpose of psychoanalytical observation, to share the perspective of what it's like, and to resonate with like-minded people. unless i explicitly state otherwise, i do not want any semblance of your pity. if you seek further understanding, i am open to questions, but know that my experience does not speak for or reflect everyone else's.

I never judge books by their cover and hold a grain of salt to everything before giving out ultimatums; in other words, I leave judgement to my own experience and not the opinions of others. I am known to be cautious, aloof, and skeptical. I am notorious for going radio-silent without any given notice. Nothing personal. Bad wiring. I believe in pure talent and pure spite equally, though my opinion shouldn't change what you do with your passions, so long as you are truly devoted. my only real goals in life are to rewrite the stigma around schizophrenia and to write fiction novels. ...and maybe make a bunch of fan art on the in-between.

uuuuhhhh other stuff ive seen in ppl's pinned posts that I am even less formal about:

my tags are #my art, #cannibal-nightmares rambles, #cannibal's music, #actually schizophrenic, #actually schizospec, #actually psychotic, #my fanfic, #my gifs among a few others.

as for content warnings, i try my best to tag for flashing lights/images (a sensitivity of my own), unreality, depictions of hallucinations, indiscernible voices, scopophobia, and gore. i find comfort in creepy shit, what can i say?

i like a lot of things, but my primary obsessions are Soul Eater (anime and manga), Hannibal (the entire franchise), Maniac (2018), House MD, and "The Boys Next Door" (1996). other big favourites include Fargo (FX), Mr. Robot, Better Call Saul, "Re-Animator" (1985), Arcane, True Detective, "Donnie Darko" (2001), "Ghost World" (2001), "Trainspotting" (1996, 2016) and much more. and sooo much music. So much music.

my (anon) asks are always open. send me a song or a question or a headcanon, if you dare. my response time means genuinely absolutely nothing, by the way, I might be the worst and most inconsistent reply in the world.

i'll probably end up making a schizophrenic storytime-type masterlist somewhere, sometime.

wow you made it this far. have some songs:

[ loathe - tool - circuit circuit - tear dungeon ]

peace, love, and anarchy.

cannibal.

[samiwife]

About Me :)

This is my introduction post. Please read below. (if you want)

Current Status for Request: Closed for now!!! (Reason: Mental Health)

Name: Saikobon or just samiwife lol...

Pronouns: She/they <3

Single or dating: Not anymore lol

Interests: I draw and write a lot. Also, I scrapbook a lot of my feelings. Venting is fun <3

Favorite band(s): The Strokes, The Libertines, The Moldy Peaches, Le Tigre, Japan, and Slowdive

Favorite Movie: The Breakfast Club or Trainspotting

Favorite Food: Oranges

What bands do I write about? Let me know if I should add or take out certain bands!

Bands:

The Cure

Blur

Pulp

The London Suede

My Chemical Romance

Sleeping With Sirens

Pierce The Veil

Guns N Roses

Motley Crue

Hanoi Rocks

LA Guns

Megadeth

Metallica

Led Zepplin

AC/DC

KISS

Pink Floyd

Maneskin

The Strokes

The Libertines

The Moldy Peaches

The Who

Nirvana

Japan

What I will not write:

Pedophilia

Rape or non-consensual stuff

Vomit stuff

Death

Underage stuff

Drug use fetish

Foot fetish

Skat

Vore

Self-harm fetish

Children (I know people like it but I don't SORRY!)

What I can write:

Smut

Fluff

Angst

Kinks

Ships

Long series (if I have a storyline)

Oneshots

Headcanons

THAT'S ALL THANKS FOR READING THIS!!! Love u <33

[in-for-a-pennyx]

Going to Scotland with Pedro boys.

This is very random yet very specific but it's been knocking around in my head for ages and I needed to get it out. I'm not entirely sure what this is but it's half headcanons, half imagines? Drabbles? I don't know what to call them. But here they are!

A/N: I'm not Scottish and I don't live in Scotland so I apologise if this is offensive 😅. I do live nearby though and absolutely love visiting. It's one of my favourite places. This is my first piece of writing and contribution to Pedro's fandom so please be gentle! I'm sorry if it comes across as muddled but this concept has been banging around in my head for so long and I really wanted to get it out.

Javier Peña - It's the first proper holiday Javier's taken in ages and the first time he's flown across the pond. You've always wanted to go and you'd put your foot down that both of you needed a break. Javi is always reluctant to travel for pleasure so he needed a bit of convincing but he'd go anywhere with you, really. You'd thrown in a "road trip!" and he was a bit more amenable after that. Plus Javi wouldn't mind trying some Scotch straight from the source.

Javier loves long drives so you both decide to drive the North Coast 500 route along the north coast of Scotland and through some of the Highlands, stopping in small villages and the cutest BnB's.  Some of the drive reminds Javi of the route from Bogotá to Medellín, especially when it rains and the vegetation turns a lush green colour. The parts you drive through are sparsely populated and Javi loves the feeling of solitude: he loves the comfortable silence you share. He feels safe in it. Some days are cold and windy and it won't stop raining and the food is a bit... interesting in parts (Haggis?!) but you're with Javi and he's warm and relaxed and present and you're sharing a flask of whisky sitting in the open boot of your car with his arms around you looking out at the sea and there's nowhere else you'd rather be.

Ezra - Being the traveler that he is, Ezra has been to Scotland numerous times and he's excited to take you. He tends to visit around Burns Night in January. Sure, he likes Robert Burns’ poetry but what he really loves about the whole thing is the national celebration of a ‘Bard’. It nurtures him to be surrounded by such reverence for storytelling. Ezra usually attends various events in Edinburgh and is thrilled to be taking you. It’s January, which means the weather is freezing so a Burns Night supper of Haggis, neeps and tatties (haggis, turnips and potatoes) in a cozy pub next to a crackling fire is the perfect way to warm up your bones, bellies and hearts. With whisky-warmed cheeks and fire-lit eyes, you’re the most beautiful creature Ezra has ever seen. 

Dieter Bravo - Dieter wanted to visit Scotland when he was in the UK shooting for Cliff Beasts 6 but it was during the pandemic so of course he couldn’t. He’s somehow never had the opportunity to ever film there. Two films that really made a mark on Dieter were incidentally Scottish. He wanted to entertain big like Braveheart but also do the gritty, more indie films like Trainspotting. He’s good mates with Ewan McGregor now but please don’t talk to him about Mel Gibson. 

You both visit one summer after the pandemic when he’s shooting another movie in London.  He’s instantly obsessed with kilts and wants to wear one everywhere. “Easy access for you, sweetheart”, he smirks and you have to stop yourself from rolling your eyes. He’s not entirely wrong though. You’re lost in (sexy) thought when you find out he’s invested in a Highland Cow farm. “They’re so cute and fluffy! Just look at them!”, he half coos, half sobs. The next time he visits, Dieter wants to go to the Shetland Islands to see Shetland ponies because animals are clearly cuter in Scotland. You have a feeling his resolve will be tested once he finds out just how remote the Shetland Islands are.

Agent Whiskey/Jack Daniels - Always one to mix business and pleasure, Jack takes you to Scotland on a Statesman business trip. He has meetings with various whisky distilleries and he takes you along. You get your own private tour of the best whisky distilleries in Scotland. Jack still insists that Kentucky Bourbon is superior even though he secretly loves scotch. “What can I say darlin’, you can take a cowboy out of Kentucky, but can’t take Kentucky out of a cowboy”, he quips. But the actual reason for this visit is to meet Merlin for some Kingsman business. Merlin needs Jack to visit an old Kingsman’s lodge in the countryside. It’s a long drive but you enjoy it nonetheless as you get some time together with Jack - just you and him. 

Max Phillips - Max, in true Max fashion, knows the Loch Ness monster. He has visited her off and on over the years and could probably introduce you if you wanted. Uhhh, you’ll have to think about it. “Oh c’mon sweetcheeks, it’ll be fun! Don’t be such a party pooper. Nessy’s just the sweetest", he pesters you. Yes, he does call the Loch Ness monster Nessy. He thinks it’s adorable. Doesn’t get why Bella was so offended in those books. 

“Now, the vampires there? I’m not gonna lie, they’re on another level. Fucking brutal, man. I’m practically a saint compared to them.”

“What? Oh don’t worry babycakes, I’ll be your vampire in shining armour.”

Pero Tovar - Pero has been to Scotland before but he’s never really talked about it. You figured he must've stopped over while visiting his friend William in Ireland. Pero's talked about William but you've never met him. Once you’re in Scotland and planning some day trips, Pero mumbles something about a group of stones and time travel, and that you should avoid them. You swear it sounds like the plot of your favourite TV series but there's no way Pero would've known that as he hardly watches TV. You look at him questioningly but he turns away with a sheepish look. Oh boy, it's about to be a long walk and a longer conversation.

Oberyn - you mean The North? Why would you want to go somewhere so cold and bleak? London's more his scene. “King’s Landing”, he corrects you. 

Dave York - You're surprised when he suggests a holiday, that too in another country. Usually he travels alone for work, and if it's family holidays, he'd rather go places he can drive as it's easier to manage with the girls.

You visit a few different cities and stay in lovely hotels. A few mornings you find Dave’s side of the bed empty but you just assume he’s gone for a run. But one day you find blood on his t-shirt while he’s in the shower after he returns. The stain doesn’t seem to be one caused by a fall or a cut. There’s just too much of it. You don’t ask him any details as you don’t want to spoil the rest of the day. A few hours later there’s news of an oil tycoon being murdered in a university town near you. The one where Prince William had studied. St Andrews - yes. Apparently it was graduation season and the man was in town for his son’s graduation. So it was work then, you sigh. And here you thought Dave was taking you on a holiday. Oh well. You better get the blood out of the t-shirt before housekeeping comes along. 

Javi G - Javi flies you privately to Scotland and rents a whole castle for your romantic getaway together. He treats you like a princess and arranges for the best of everything to be available for you. During one of your strolls in the castle gardens, he gets down on one knee and proposes to you. You’re absolutely taken aback and all but shout “Yes! Of course I’ll marry you!”. Oh, you’ve never been happier. Javi flies in both your friends and families to celebrate. An actual ball is arranged and you have to pinch yourself multiple times to believe that it’s all real, it’s all happening. That this generous, loving, sincere man is going to be your husband.

[laliloon]

Quick little blog intro since I need to rewrite my art request rules.

Hi! It’s lovely to see you, thanks for stopping by and allow me to introduce myself 💕🦕:

💕🦕 My name is Lily, but if you want you can call me Lali.

💕🦕 I’m a Weedgie🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 lass currently residing in England.

💕🦕 I mainly focus on creepypasta, but I’m also interested in marble hornets, general horror, psychology, sociology, politics, history, fashion and venomous snakes.

💕🦕 I’m seventeen. Adults are allowed to interact but if my boundaries are crossed then you will be blocked (just don’t be weird and you’ll be fine).

💕🦕 I tend to reblog content discussing intersectional feminism, socialism, racial/gender/disability/sexuality equality and other left wing ideologies. Don’t like, leave.

💕🦕 I have a pretty morbid taste in literature and often portray and discuss dark or disturbing themes in my art, writing and general posts and I don’t tend to trigger tag, so if you want me to tag something then please just shoot me a quick message and I will do so.

—————

I do art and headcanon requests! Here are the rules 💕🦕:

💕🦕 Please keep requests related to creepypasta as I don’t want this blog to get sidetracked.

💕🦕 I will draw up to three characters per drawing, no more.

💕🦕 Subjects I will not draw/write about:

Hateful or discriminatory content.

Ships.

Over the top gore - I’m fine with portraying some level of gore, but straight up gore porn is not allowed.

Sexual content.

💕🦕 Characters I will not draw/write about:

Slender brothers (Slenderman himself is allowed, but I’m either apathetic towards or actively dislike the other ones *cough* Offenderman *cough*).

Time Lapse.

💕🦕 Feel free to request a theme or prompt along with your request, I enjoy prompt-based doodles!

💕🦕 I might take a little while to respond since I have to prioritise my exams which are this June, so please be patient with me as I will eventually respond.

—————

Here’s Some Cool People To Follow 💕🦕:

@neerasrealm @proxymorons @tomfuckery06 @hauntedtotem @frogama @humanmousetrap @frankie-the-undead @glassartpeasants @the-catcake @thebleedingalien @tortillasconsal

—————

Reading List For 2023 💕🦕:

AKA: Books I started reading within the last two years and then exams happened.

💕🦕 Trainspotting - Irvine Welsh

💕🦕 Filth - Irvine Welsh

💕🦕 Skagboys - Irvine Welsh

💕🦕 Dead Men’s Trousers - Irvine Welsh

💕🦕 How to Grow an Addict - J.A.Wright

💕🦕 Dracula - Bram Stoker

💕🦕 Lord of the Flies - William Golding

💕🦕 The Song of Achilles - Madeline Miller

💕🦕 Dune - Frank Herbert

💕🦕 Inferno - Dante Alighieri

💕🦕 Mary Tudor: England’s First Queen - Anna Whitelock

💕🦕 Edward VI: The Lost King of England - Chris Skidmore

💕🦕 She-Wolves: The Women Who Ruled England Before Elizabeth - Helen Castor

💕🦕 I Know What I Am: The Life and Times of Artemisia Gentileschi - Gina Siciliano

💕🦕 The Psychology Book - Multiple Authors

💕🦕 Women, Race and Class - Angela Davis

💕🦕 The Communist Manifesto - Karl Marx and Friedrich Engels (basic ass leftist book I know I know)

💕🦕 The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster - Bobby Henderson

💕🦕 Stranger in a Strange Land - Robert A. Heinlein

—————

If I see any blogs doing the following then I will block them immediately:

Promoting hateful and discriminatory ideologies.

Promoting/glamorising abuse/pedophilia/necrophilia/beastiality/incest - this includes MAPS and proshippers.

Directing harassment or abuse towards other users.

Showing support for Snuffbomb, La Mishi Mish and xXAmLuvsXx.

💕🦕 As long as you don’t do any of the above, we’ll get along just fine :)

That’s all! Stick around if you fancy it 💕🦕.

[cosmic-cd]

i need to get some pokemon thoughts out before i forget 'em, so don't mind me! hazel's galar run thoughts and headcanons ahead

so there's a lot of miscellaneous thoughts here but i'll try to keep it. a little more or less coherent?

before we get to galar, first thought iiis

i've had it be a thing for a while that hazel knows ingo & emmet, but other than her riding the trains in unova a lot ever since she was younger and ingo and emmet were working their way up the ranks to becoming the subway masters, i couldn't particularly think of a reason otherwise why she'd be close with them (to the point of going "oh they're like practically uncles to me")

but hazel is friends with the striaton bros. (seeing as the restaurant is just one route away, and hazel lives in accumula town, visiting striaton city frequently, especially to hang out in the dreamyard)

and, well.. one of my favorite areas in unova is Anville Town, and so-

hazel and cilan (via the anime-specific version of cilan's interest in trains. canon to me.) probably bonded over a mutual interest in trains, and similarly hazel would've probably gotten talking to ingo & emmet about the subway trains- i think it'd be cute if they all went trainspotting together in anville town on the weekends- as well as hazel riding the battle trains as she got more and more into pokemon battling

(and then seeing ingo later... earlier?? in hisui. would be a little more ouch)

anyways, galar thoughts and headcanons

1. this is more of a general headcanon, but i was thinking about it while listening to encounter themes- it'd be neat if trainers challenging each other to battles on routes was standardized- encounter themes are diagetic- like ringtones, whatever phone or device (i.e. x-transceiver, vs seeker, what have you) plays it when you cross paths with another trainer who's actively seeking battles, and said device displays current registered pokemon league information about that trainer

2. when hazel arrives in galar, leon ends up meeting her at the train station at the same time he's meeting with hop & gloria, and hazel has literally no clue who he is other than immediately developing a crush on the guy..... i think it'd be funny as an inverse of this if hop recognized hazel- not as just like, the girl who's staying in their family home's guest room while she's in the region, but also knowing her from watching her battles online (to which hazel has a horrified reaction due to Not Wanting To Be Perceived)

Hop: oh, your battles only have about 1,000 views each! pretty underrated if you ask me Hazel: a-- a thousand??? (urge to disappear into the woods until no one remembers she exists rising)

this is feasible to happen just because i think she might naturally develop a very small following due to. literally having a pikachu as her ace. and collecting gym badges and specifically never challenging the champion afterwards. which! i'm sure is a passtime other people have, but specifically sweeping gyms with a pikachu is a little funny

3. i feel like it'd be more authentic to the experience if hazel didn't know anybody in galar otherwise and nobody knew her- but also i realized sonia and bianca would make ADORABLE friends. the thought of sonia flipping from indifference to OHHHHH YOU'RE THE HAZEL BIANCA WAS TALKING ABOUT!!!!!

4. i don't know if i'll do much more than privately write out hazel's adventures for myself to enjoy, but if i ever did make a comic, i'd love to expand on the galar region and have leon accompany hazel a goodly amount (and similarly hazel accompany leon and help calm down aggressive dynamaxed pokemon) in between her chaperoning for hop & gloria on their adventure and challenging gyms herself

but i've been wanting to play with giving the story more flourish and fixing some of the issues that a lot of people have with the ending feeling rushed by giving rose more context to his motivations, more intrigue in the narrative with the legendary wolves, and one thing i'd really like to play with is the original heroes of galar and a one-off line from Ash in Journeys, which has him say the statue of the hero in one of the hotels looks like Leon)

i really like the narrative of rose being very romantic about how he sees the world and wanting to bring about a second darkest day so it can play out like a fairy tale and leon will be the hero in the starring role. that, wishing as hard as he can, he can shift fate itself and the hero king will tame the dragon and bring about a bright future. leon is written as a protagonist. sort of dorky outfit, using a starter as his ace, went on his journey and became champion on his first try, had a rival who ended up becoming a pokemon professor, his theme LITERALLY has the hall of fame theme as a motif- he's written as someone who is literally the ideal protagonist and hero.

and it just.. doesn't work. he fails! i want to work with that so badly. i loved that so dearly about BW with that similar narrative with basically creating a new pair of heroes at ideological odds by forcing it to happen. in the case of the unovan dragons, it turned out for the better, but in the case of galar it's such an interesting twist on the same kind of story and i love both games so much!!!!

anyways. dusts hands off. there you go. i go back under my rock now and pretend i'm not completely obsessed with leon and SWSH. goodbye

[blnk338]

HEY BLNK as a extremely bored and headcanon loving film enthusiast and lover I thought I would be very annoying and share my opinions into what I think the teams taste and thoughts on films were so enjoy:)

_________

Soap-

Tried to get into film bro movies but did not understand anything. Wanted to watch trainspotting because it was Scottish but turned it off and threw up after the toilet scene.

Brainrot movie enjoyer (basically he doesn’t care how shitty the film is as long as it is funny in some way and keeps him awake he loves it)

fave films are Guardians of the galaxy and finding nemo

Price-

PRETENTIOUS AS FUCK!! definitely a big lover of 70s and 80s films.

will not stop boasting about how amazing his taste is

big Kubrick and Scorsese fan

Fave film is The Godfather

Gaz-

Actually has good taste (it’s basically all of the Letterboxd top 100 but I’ll let him off since he’s a busy man)

proud Letterboxd user aswell

Once got very into Wes Anderson and did a big binge and his eyes didn’t move of the screen once

Fave film is the grand Budapest hotel

Simon-

Whats a film

does not have the time or the attention span to sit through anything

that being said he somehow managed to sit through some hardcore Tarkovsky so I guess Ivan’s childhood is his favourite since he’s not really liked anything else.

PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK REAPERS TASTE WOULD BE!!!!:)))

hard agree on all of them, but i also have a little piece of my heart that thinks that simon would be a romcoms. like the most cringey, ugly, mind numbing ones have him hugging the couch cushions with knit eyebrows.

reaper's definitely one for sillies-- the new puss in boots was a big favorite of hers. but she definitely adored everything everywhere all at once for a million reasons, but one especially is because of the familial relations. my reaper, nadya, is a first gen kid and the movie was astronomical for her (tried to show it to my immigrant mom, she didn't understand LMAO)-- also liked bodies bodies bodies

[vulpix91]

Lake Aqua

[gedicht dat ik schreef voor de avond "Virtueel Lichaam" in Perdu, op 03/06/2022. Het gaat over een vriendschap met een half-virtueel meisje op een oud forum dat inmiddels al lang offline is & alleen nog in fragmenten terug te vinden is via de WayBackMachine. Leek me gepast om op mijn verwaarloosde maar niettemin nog steeds hardnekkig bestaande blog te posten! xoxo]

1.

Ze verschijnt in stukjes:

een pagina op de Waybackmachine, een versteend velletje pixels ik kan er niet door prikken of er overheen glijden naar elders de kapotte links zijn lange dunne wondes, iets bloedt glitchend dood en de vloeistof stagneert

het oude web is nog niet helemaal gemetaboliseerd, het ligt submerged onder dit vervloekte landschap, onder de gladde platformen

maar hier en daar steekt er een stomp rottende code boven het gepolijste oppervlak.

Ik zoek tunnels tussen de flarden die zij achterliet

contextloze vegen taal over het scherm gesmeerd, kapotte afbeeldingsbestanden de grijze leegte waar ooit haar avatar stond, nu een slap regeltje code dat nergens meer op aansluit, nergens naar verwijst een gebroken amulet waaruit alle magie is weggevloeid

haar gefragmenteerde lichaam is amorf en heeft geen duidelijke grenzen

stukjes verschijnen, glinsterend, uit het niets zinken meteen weer weg in algoritmische moerassen.

In oude legendes, Arthurverhalen, Egyptische mythes moest het lichaam van de gewonde koning geheeld worden zijn verminkte lichaamsdelen samengesprokkeld om het dorre land weer vruchtbaar te maken.

Ik zoek haar al een decennium in de brokstukken maar er is geen magisch ritueel ik heb geen spreuk, geen balsem om de gebroken code te lijmen

2.

Ik leerde haar kennen in 2006. Ik was 14 en in mijn dagboek schreef ik dingen als, “het erge is dat het allemaal waar is”, “ik denk zelfs dat er geen ‘ik’ is, alleen een samenraapsel omhulsels”, “morgen is de laatste dag van mijn leven, dat toch nog een beetje als een minderwaardige vorm van een leven beschouwd kan worden”, of “fuck fuck fuck shit klote kut shit shit shit shit shit FUCK FUCK FUUUUCK ik wil dood ik wil dood dood dood doder dan dood waarom ik waarom ik?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!” Online kon ik iemand anders zijn. Ik bracht mijn uren door op een forum, inmiddels al tien jaar offline, waar we fanfiction schreven over het computerspel The Sims 2. Mijn eigen gebruikersnaam ben ik vergeten, maar de hare herinner ik me haarscherp, en iedere interactie met haar staat in mijn geheugen gegrift. Ze woonde in Engeland en postte over hoe ze flesjes Bacardi Breezer en Smirnoff Ice ging verstoppen onder de struiken in het park om er later met haar vrienden stiekem dronken te worden, over hoe ze ’s nachts high en huilend met een gebroken hart door de straten zwierf, hoe ze op 12 centimeter hoge stiletto’s naar optredens van Kasabian ging. Ze schreef verhalen over alcohol, drugs, seks en depressie, en haar favoriete film was Trainspotting. Dat ik verder weinig over haar wist, verhinderde me niet om die paar sliertjes digitale informatie uit te rekken als kauwgomdraden, er een semi-fictief tapijt van te weven dat mijn virtuele en belichaamde levens overbrugde, aan elkaar plakte. In mijn headcanon, in de fanfic-versie van mijn eigen bestaan, werd ze een belangrijk personage, deel van mijn spirituele inner circle. De virtuele sporen die ze achterliet beïnvloedden me op tastbare manieren: de muziek waar ik naar luisterde, de boeken die ik las, de levensstijl waar ik naar aspireerde, de manieren waarop ik mijn emoties plaatste en benoemde, maar ook esthetiseerde en romantiseerde. Tot vandaag ben ik ervan overtuigd dat de momenten waarop we elkaar kruisten in de nu lang vervlogen datawolken van een obscuur forum een onmogelijk te kwantificeren, maar niettemin onmiskenbare impact hadden op wie ik later geworden ben. Niet zozeer de “echte” persoon die ze was, met een vorm en een massa, die op bepaalde punten in de tijd op bepaalde locaties een bepaald volume aan ruimte innam, maar het omhulsel dat ik in de loop der tijd weefde rond haar digitale manifestatie, een kleed van projecties en emoties en verlangens, tot de materiële kern uiteindelijk irrelevant werd, oploste, wegsijpelde…

3.

Het licht lijkt iets kwaadaardigs in zich te dragen een nauwelijks verborgen dreiging in het hart van dit witte stralen

het schroeit de vorm weg waarin ze zich lange tijd heeft getoond dwingt de opacity slider van haar huid omlaag

op weg naar het nulpunt slinkt ze tot een vloeibaar netwerk van inputs, outputs, flows vochtig weefsel van organische vlokjes code

redundant, verouderd, in onbruik kapotte splinters afgedankte programmeertaal afgebrokkeld van de algoritmische architectuur

en naar de bodem gezonken

geen geboorte maar accumulatie sedimentatie

een doelloos, richtingloos samenklonteren

4.

De straling werkt niet altijd op dezelfde manier operaties variëren afhankelijk van parameters die voor haar en voor mij zorgvuldig verborgen blijven

soms brandt het licht niet haar zichtbaarheid weg maar haar textuur, de plooitjes, poriën traangoten, de lijntjes in haar lippen

haar knokkels smelten weg in een egaal oppervlak haar lokken klonteren samen tot een klomp glad en bouncy maar ondeelbaar

overal om haar heen wordt alles digitaal, ik maak het zo

zandvlaktes zonder korrels

donzige wolken perfect gelijkmatig verdeeld over de onveranderlijk strakblauwe hemel

een compositie zo volmaakt, zo instant rustgevend dat ze zich afvraagt welke formule aan de basis ligt de vormen, tinten, percentages van transparantie gedistribueerd volgens welke onzichtbare matrix

dagenlang zat ze in de schaduw van een boom, de bladeren star en onbeweeglijk tot ze besefte dat in al die tijd de wolken geen centimeter, geen millimeter verschoven waren

pas toen ze dit zag kreeg ze toegang tot een nieuwe laag, ze vond werktuigen om iets ongedaan te maken

voegde ze toe aan haar inventaris door ze in haar lichaam op te bergen, onder haar huid maar er was geen bloed, niets dat brak of scheurde

5.

Obsessie? Ik bijt me vast in dingen omdat ik iets wil aantreffen in hun kern, geen waarheid of betekenis maar een glanzend, lichtgevend zaadje dat ik kan inslikken en dat mij zal veranderen van binnenuit, een transformatie die vervolgens zal uitdijen, zich als een welwillende olievlek zal verspreiden over de wereld om me heen. Is het werkelijk zij die ik zoek, op deze trieste kapotte pagina’s, in dit barre land aangevreten door linkrot? Of projecteer ik op haar ook iets anders, een vroegere incarnatie van het internet, een weerbarstiger landschap dat nog nauwelijks was gekoloniseerd door sociale mediaconglomeraten, waar we nog niet waren vastgeklemd in de mysterieuze wurggrepen van gesofisticeerde algoritmes? Een landschap waarin ik haar kon construeren uit snippers code, realiteit, fictie? Een kruispunt van paden, in de nacht, het artificiële licht van een volle maan…

6.

Op het ter ziele gegane forum werd er een collectieve role-playing-scène geschreven die zich afspeelde op een locatie die Lake Aqua heette en dit is nu

waar we elkaar alsnog kunnen treffen, misschien, ook al is het inmiddels zo laat geworden.

Lake Aqua ligt op de bodem van het internet, waar zich alles zich verzamelt dat geen binnenkant meer heeft waaraan tekens blijven plakken

alles dat door flinterdunne barstjes in de gladde uren valt

wanneer het begint te glitchen

een zwembad staat in brand, de dag klontert samen, een stervormige wonde schittert in het scherm

in de grond verschijnt een groot rechthoekig gat waardoor de blauwe hemel zichtbaar is de randen tonen hoe flinterdun de laag is waarop iedereen zich nietsvermoedend voortbeweegt een vlak zonder substantie

wanneer er door de gaten in de code iets zieks naar binnen sijpelt dat een zorgvuldig geconstrueerde realiteit aanvreet haar doet wegrotten als een ongrijpbare, immateriële schimmel

niets gaat dood, het wordt gewoon gecomprimeerd, schudt metadata en diepte af

spoelt aan op deze oever, in het donkere schuim

de paden rond Lake Aqua zijn niet rechtlijnig we leggen nieuwe plooien in het digitale weefsel, vouwen het anders dan voorheen brengen punten in tijd en ruimte die ver van elkaar verwijderd leken in direct verband met elkaar ze zegt, “deze manipulatie is magie”

’s nachts koelt het af, een duistere luchtstroom doet onze health points snel dalen

nu het overal om ons heen ijskoud brandt, rivieren veranderen in asfaltmeren

alles flikkert is instabiel

in de struiken glinsteren roze flesjes Eristoff Pink nee Bacardi Breezer Cranberry nee molotov cocktails

we grijpen onze wapens en het bloedt niet wanneer ze deel worden van ons

we kijken naar omhoog, de gladde hemel waar alles met zichzelf samenvalt klamme wilde nachtmerries geherformatteerd tot gerasterde kwantificeerbare dromen

maar hier, beneden, in de duisternis is alles wat flikkert op het oppervlak van Lake Aqua vaag en ambigu, uit focus

en ik weet niet of de beelden herinneringen zijn fantasieën zonder oorsprong of iets collectiefs een sediment van schilfers code uit de pels van de geschiedenis gedwarreld

onze reflecties verstrengelen zich baren miljarden kopieën worden lichaam

gebroken en gebarsten gesprokkeld en gelijmd wirwar van duizend syntaxen die in elkaars structuren zijn binnengeglipt

ze zegt “je kan blijven puzzelen

maar er is alleen de wonde ze gutst pixels alleen het barre land maar er bloeien roze flesjes wapens dit lichaam is een heterogeen uitdijend inventaris en het rafelt maar het bloedt niet”

het water valt uiteen in bits

we duiken

[creepling]

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★ MISCELLANEOUS

a mix of fandoms that i have written one or two fanfics for. ⊹₊⋆ = involves smut.

༺☆༻ SAMMY FABELMAN (THE FABLEMANS)

. . . drabbles & headcanons

dating sammy fabelman (gn!reader, fluff)

meeting the fabelmans (gn!reader, fluff)

༺☆༻ DIN DJARN (THE MANDALORIAN)

. . . fics

the shape of you (fem!reader) ⊹₊⋆

༺☆༻ GREG HIRSCH (SUCCESSION)

. . . fics

i want to hold you (gn!reader, fluff)

༺☆༻ MARK RENTON (TRAINSPOTTING)

hole o’ the toon (fem!reader, scots language/dialect)

༺☆༻ JOEL MILLER (THE LAST OF US)

. . . drabbles & headcanons

sharing a bed with joel (gn!reader)

[huntingingoodwill]

i just discovered your blog and i fell in love!! do you have any headcanons about our favourite simon sick boy williamson at all? no worries if not!! <33

🧸 send me hcs 🧸 do it!!! i dare u!!!

awh thanks man!! my inbox is always open for a chat about ill man. v pumped to talk abt him so tysm :)) send in ur sick boy thoughts whenever <33

without further ado: sick boy headcanons ✨

we all know simon's a total james bond/connery fanboy. i imagine this stems from a real place of childhood innocence and admiration :,) little simon staying up late to watch old james bond films on tv in his pajamas, just completely in awe. his childhood bedroom has a bunch of 007 memorabillia and connery posters, and he'd spout trivia to his friends at school and rant about how cool he thinks bond is, still tired but buzzin from staying up to watch the rerun the night before. total fanboy nerd shit, a really pure sort of excitement. he still loves it, but he's toned down the geeking out over it as he grew up to appear cooler, but james bond will always be a childhood idol. it's a reminder of a simpler time for him, when all the world's grodiness had yet to corrupt him. mark definitely remembers spending recess staring into space, listening to simon gush about connery. just sweet and innocent times. before the world went to shit. "downward trajectory."

imagine going thrifting with him. vibes. would definitely push you around in the cart. i just did a robert fischer hc where i said rob might like to go shopping. if rob likes it, simon loves clothes shopping. loves to keep himself looking sharp. it's mostly thrifting but when he comes into a bit of money he'll splurge on luxury stuff. i highkey hc he buys his s.o. those matching barbed wire rings. whenever he gets in a fight and he sees the nick of the wire on the other guy where his fist landed he just does a little :) bc he's... not a good person ! but it reminds him of s.o 💕

there are definitely days where mark, simon and s.o. hang out in the bathroom to touch up each other's hair. just smoking and buzzing rents' head, touching up simon's roots with a toothbrush, lying in the empty bathtub/sitting on the sink counter while waiting for simon to rinse his hair out, chatting shit.

also a lot of playing football with the guys/cheering them on and going out to celebrate or complain afterward depending on how the game went (i feel like the guys are pretty bad at football but they'd never admit it)

in the movies simon ends up owning a pub but i feel like in another life he'd be a good businessman. become a real city slicker, a little bit of a wolf of Wall Street existence

thanks so much anon 💕

[littleoddwriter]

Hello there!! I'm back again :) Can I get another Mark Renton x GN reader headcanon? About caressing and comforting Mark, but also a bit NSFW if you could. I hope you're doing well, and thank you so much!! Muah xx

Mark Renton x GenderNeutral!Reader | (mild N/SFW) Headcanons

Hiya there!!! Yes, of course, thank you very much for your request and everything else. I do hope you enjoy these, and I'm sorry it took me a while! Take care! <3 <3 <3

notes; Gender Neutral!Reader; Comfort; Touching; Caressing; Past-Drug Addiction; Relapse; Withdrawal; Implied/Referenced Handjob and Blowjob.

Taglist: @gnrlkenob [Anybody who would like to be tagged in my writing just has to send me an Ask or DM about it, plus the information whether you want to be tagged in everything I post or only certain things, like Ewan McGregor character works, etc.]

Reblogs would be appreciated, thank you!

He's always loved being touched and rarely cared who it was, as long as he got some physical contact out of it. And ever since he's been with you, he craves your touch more than anything.

It's simple things like a hand to his cheek, a thumb stroking over his skin there; your nose rubbing against his; your hand stroking over his buzzcut; your arm around his waist or shoulders. All of those things make him weak in the knees and fill him up with warmth that he hasn't truly felt before he'd met you.

This sort of contact has become especially important when he's relapsed, though. Getting clean is one thing, it's almost easy; but staying off of drugs is the truly difficult part. He still hasn't quite gotten the hang of it just yet.

Mark is lucky that you're always there for him when it happens and when he is on withdrawal yet again. You're cuddling him, holding him close with his head resting on your chest, as he shivers through the absolute hell that is withdrawal.

Your gentle caresses are what keep him somewhat sane during all of it. It's hard, yes, but it'd be practically unmanageable without you by his side, touching and reassuring him with all the love you have for him.

Whenever the worst is over and he feels less dead on his feet, he often becomes rather horny, and is therefore quickly aroused by your constant caressing.

And if he asks for it, you'll take care of said arousal by using your hand or your mouth on him to bring him to orgasm. Nothing - beside heroine - quiets down his mind like an orgasm does; especially one that's caused by you.