#uni experience

[chocolate-quotes]

yk you're living the 'elite' uni experience when;

•you didn't sleep all night

•currently barely opening your eyes

•your only meal was half of a snickers bar

•you're cold

•head spinning 7/24

•will have a breakdown if you think too much or think at all honestly

•on your last $10

•everything hurts

•have no friends

•anxiety 7/24

•fucking adhd

•a bit anaemic

•your way of preparing for exams is looking at the course material, cursing yourself for not starting earlier and crying cause everything is hard and you feel dumb

•have i mentioned existential crisis

•crying

•lots of crying

•going numb

[seeking-knowledge]

love it when the picture of the microscope doesn’t get the light at the right angle and it looks like the moon. but it’s actually tiny living cells.

(forgive the water droplets i haven’t used a microscope for two years of pandemic T-T )

[folklorebau]

university in a nutshell is just learning how to be alone because you start off as new adults and you crave the friendship of other people, being in a new city without your parents/guardians and then two years later everyone is doing their own thing, drowning in their own projects, making new friends, moving in together, starting romantic relationships, having one night stands, drinking, falling apart and it can be so isolating. it’s such a harrowingly lonely experience because there is no singular right way to do it but whatever you are doing just feels wrong and different to what everyone else is doing. like it irks me to think about how university taught me nothing but how to despise everything i do from the moment i wake up to the moment i go to sleep.

[korescorner]

Refusing to acknowledge that you need to study for a test is a great tactic, because then at least instead of being unprepared and stressed, you're just unprepared

[liones-s]

one of the biggest things I can advocate for (in academia, but also just in life) is to build credibility with yourself. It’s easy to fall into the habit of thinking of yourself as someone who does things last minute or who struggles to start tasks. people will tell you that you just need to build different habits, but I know for me at least the idea of ‘habit’ is sort of abstract and dehumanizing. Credibility is more like ‘I’ve done this before, so I know I can do it, and more importantly I trust myself to do it’. you set an assignment goal for the day and you meet it, and then you feel stronger setting one the next day. You establish a relationship with yourself that’s built on confidence and trust. That in turn starts to erode the barrier of insecurity and perfectionism and makes it easier to start and finish tasks. reframing the narrative as a process of building credibility makes it easier to celebrate each step and recognize how strong your relationship with yourself can become

[aeryqueen]

Guys I’m in major need of help, I’m failing uni (slay💅🏼) because I keep failing my exams and I’m in danger of being kicked out😃 can you please please share tips on how to productively study for uni?? I’m obviously doing something wrong here but I just can’t find out what…

[fuckoptimism]

ppl don’t talk enough about how uni is actually the mostly mentally, emotionally and physically draining experience and it’s not all going out and getting drunk. uni is crying in ur bed bc u feel alone. uni is going to the store only to have grocery store anxiety bc u feel like everyone’s looking at you. uni is skipping lectures just because you don’t want to exist. uni is missing your family so much it feels like missing a limb (that is, if your family loves you and you love them and maybe even if you don’t), uni is feeling like you’re always doing new things like you’re constantly in the unknown. uni is panicking about houses disappearing in 0.2 seconds and feeling like estate agents are out to get you because you’re just an 18 year old. feeling too young to be about to rent a house. feeling stupid a lot of the time compared to your peers. feeling like you’re not studying hard enough. uni is sleeping a lot. uni really is crying like a lot. uni is feeling bad for being single because these are the years you’re supposed to be finding someone but you’ve found fuck all. uni is feeling like you’re missing out on the experience of being single at uni, if you are dating. uni is feeling like you’re not having enough fun or enough sex or enough adventure as others. uni is feeling like your friends don’t actually like you or like you don’t have enough friends or overwhelmed because you have too many and social activities do become draining when you’re doing them all the time. uni is getting sick of the same 4 walls of your room in your flat. uni is a good experience, i’ve had some of the best times here. but it’s also fucking shit, if i’m honest. and i feel like people are so fake saying it’s the best thing every day, all the time. bc it’s just not.

[lesbianbard]

i thought that in order to socialise at uni i would be peer pressured to drink, but actually people just peer pressure you to watch football 😭

[emo-batboy]

Things Battinson Totally Did During His First Year of University

Using Unhinged or Odd Things I Also Did as a College Freshman :D

Note: for this list, let’s believe Bruce was living in an (admittedly expensive and swanky) dorm because it is required for first-years, especially those entering at a young age, and Alfred told him he needed to make friends. Also yes I did every single thing on this list. I never claimed to be a role model

Bruce, to his TA: I’m so sorry I’m late to class. I gave blood a few hours ago and almost fainted on the way here, but it won’t happen again.

Signs up for a class called “Age of Dinosaurs” despite it not being required whatsoever and proceeds to work his entire schedule around it

Bruce: Your mental health is super important. If you think you should see the on-campus therapist, go see them. Friend: Fine. I’ll sign up for therapy if you sign up for therapy too. Bruce: Hold on-

Finds a loophole in his housing contract that allows him to get a pet frog, calls him kermit :)

Gets a second frog because Kermit was lonely, names it Constantine after Muppets Most Wanted, then realizes that they’re gay for each other. Wonders if the rainbow-colored rocks he got them triggered anything

Swings dramatically between calling Alfred every single day and ghosting him for weeks, cries when he realizes what he did

“Accidentally” joins the student body council, doesn’t know what he’s doing, gets re-elected anyway

Molds a dragon out of Laffy Taffy instead of doing his work

Bruce: *joins Honors, gets all A’s, takes the max amount of classes, has several minors, overachieves* Also Bruce: I’m a failure.

Breaks into a building after hours to study because NO ONE KNOWS HOW TO SHUT THE FUCK UP AT THE LIBRARY

Bruce: I will not get seasonal depression this year. Bruce: *gets real and seasonal depression that year*

Meticulously schedules his day with a color-coded planner because if he sits down for too long, the thoughts will consume him

Gives a presentation to his rhetoric class on how much he likes Spider-Man: Into the Spiderverse (it is 20 minutes long)

Successfully allocates funding from the student body council to pay for free feminine products in the dorms OUT OF SPITE because someone said it couldn't be done. fuck you, Andrew

Bruce: It is not an all-nighter if I go to sleep before my first class. Friend: It is 7:30am, the sun is in the sky, and your first class is at 12:30. Bruce: But I am getting sleep.

Refuses to go anywhere without his backpack because what if he needs three notebooks at once

Loses over 20 pounds because ✨stress✨ and scares the shit out of Alfred when he comes home for Thanksgiving

Argues with his TA over the one (1) question he got wrong on his Dinosaur exam

Bruce, calling Alfred: Hello father figure. How do I do taxes? Do I have to do them myself? Also, I think I’m having a panic attack.

Joins in on a charity arts-and-crafts project that gives kids books with matching activities made by volunteers, proceeds to commandeer the project because “it’s not color-blind friendly” and rewrites the instructions for everyone

Makes a murder wall

Goes to one (1) sports game and proceeds to leave in the first ten minutes because it’s way too loud wtf is wrong with people

Professor, addressing the lecture hall: I dare you to write an essay about these two sentences. Bruce: *writes an essay about six words, gets a 100, never even read the book*

Crawls into the ceiling for some alone time

Ghosts someone after a date because he’s too scared to tell them he didn’t know it was a date in the first place and now he feels bad

Classmate: How tf does he walk across campus that fast? I go in the same direction he does on my bike, and he’s always ahead of me. Bruce: *is gay sprinting to Dinosaur class*

Refuses to let others use his Favorite Pen TM

Constantly gets mistaken for a Grad Student because he is “so wise and mature” (bestie, that’s the autism)

Alfred: *casually mentions he got into a car accident through text* Bruce: *replies with a meme while hyperventilating because he doesn’t know what to do with that information??!*

Wears a suit to one of his finals

Regularly eats non-organic food for the first time in his life, proceeds to learn about several allergies Alfred forgot to mention he has

Writes “What is a Hot Pocket?” in calligraphy and proceeds to laugh his ass off alone in his dorm because he is so exhausted he’s reached the point of delusion

Locks himself out of his dorm right before class, frantically asks the floor group chat if someone can help, proceeds to tell the nice gay man on the floor who saved him “I love you” because his social skills have hit rock bottom

Makes a little music album display next to his desk for his favorite band (Nirvana) His friends call it a shrine, and they are technically correct

Has a blacklist of people he refuses to interact with because Reasons

Counselor: What do you want to do when you graduate? Bruce: *gestures vaguely*

Refuses to take the bus because there are people in there and he doesn’t like those

Loses one of his frogs, how tf did he do that, they’re fully aquatic, oh fuck, this is probably why they got rid of that loophole a year later because unbeknownst to Bruce, he accidentally started a frog revolution in the dorms, btw he SWEARS he did not mean to do that

Has two trash cans in his room: one for the Good Garbage, and one for the Bad Garbage. Only Bruce knows which is which

Bruce: *writes a creative piece about a ship’s final thoughts as it sinks, bringing its passengers down with it* TA: Absolutely lovely, Bruce, but are you okay?

Goes on Night Walks, keeps himself safe by maintaining a level 12 resting bitch face at all times

Earns the nickname “8th floor cryptid” after pacing the halls at 3am when it’s too cold for Night Walks (honestly tho how tf didn’t he get the nickname earlier?)

Bruce: Do you think a depressed person could do this? Bruce: *has a manic episode*

Okay that's all love you BYE

[pierog]

tiny comic about eating toast with friends

[nerdy-arty]

Together forever~

[seeking-knowledge]

today i learned i can make my circuit float in space.

[manicpixiefelix]

just a few modern!Saltburn social media headcanons from the oxford era

venetia is obviously trying her hand at being an influencer

she has more followers than felix and brags about it constantly but refuses to unblock him

oliver's only on linkedin at first because his high school guidance councillor told him he should be on it.

felix's oxford friends group chat is wild but nowhere near as bad as their snapchat group

their snapchat group is Feral and half the things they send while shitfaced would get them cancelled

current group chat name is SOCIALIST SLUTS INCORPERATED

felix's current name in the chat is Sir Oral Fixation 👅💦 

half the group blocked ollie when he tried to add them because only got proper social media after getting to oxford. he has a generic user name and no profile picture at first and they thought he was a bot.

farleigh gave Oliver the nickname 'WDE' in the chat but admitted that it stands for Weird Dick Energy. Felix changed Oliver's nickname to just Ollie and no-one's changed it since.

there is a second gc that felix and oliver don't know about :(

half of Oxford University Confessions on facebook are about Felix

annabel and india both follow a felix catton fan account on instagram but will say they got hacked if anyone points it out

farleigh runs the felix catton fan account and finds it hilarious that anyone follows it because he dedicates the entire thing to posting the most unflattering, blurry, up close, bizarre photos of felix he can manage to capture.

[tabooiart]

mr goatman... goat me a man.... make him the goatest that ive ever seen...

[ronnierosest]

Zakkura "So he never initiates, never asks, and waits." - inspired by a fanfiction we're friends, right? (very adult) by totosheadset

[waitingawhile]

oh shiii-