#was seeing babies in suits

[kizzer55555]

Ultimate Escape Room

Sam, Danny, and Tucker are bored. Nothing seems to be a challenge anymore. Summer vacation is coming up but they can’t agree on anything . Themepark? What’s a better roller coaster than Jack driving? Scary movie? I’m sorry, nothing beats Fright Knight’s nightmare realm. Bungie jumping? Danny can fly. Then Tucker, who’s been typing on his computer, asks “what about an escape room?”. The others are about to shut the idea down because seriously? Easy. But Tucker just grins and shows them his computer screen.

“Ever heard of Arkham?”

Danny and Sam lean over to read the description and all three turn to each other and grin. 

Now, what’s the fastest way to get into Arkham?

…

So the chaos trio do ✨something✨ that gets them locked up in Arkham and then try to escape and they keep. You know, normal stuff for Arkham inmates. Except this trio? Keep. Getting. Out. Of. Their. Cells. So they are just passing by locked up rogues and waving at them as an army of prison guards chase after them. Sure they could get out the easy way (Aka powers) but no, this is a challenge so they have the normal rules of an escape room. Aka, you can’t break anything and an extra rule where if a guard catches you, then you can’t fight back (also, no one can get hurt). (They make fake identities and everything). So they need to go through the whole process. Figure out how to unlock cuffs. Could be learning to pick a lock with a spoon/stick/long nails. Then find the keys. Possibly having to crawl through vents to get in the warden’s office. Or making deals with prison inmates. Like, I’ll get this for you if you give me that (however they extract a promise that the rogue can’t kill anyone with whatever they help them with.) So they are in prison literally doing errands like find freeze’s weapons in exchange for him telling them the passcode to the gate or something. Or getting Waylon some meat from the cafeteria and he’ll break the lock on this movable vault that has materials to make smoke bombs they can use to distract the front guards. 

These kids are just going wild and it gets to the point where Arkham has to call the bats (like no Waylon, we won’t escape with you, we have to do it without breaking any walls!) So literally the only reason they are not escaping is because they want to do it ‘right’. But they are also aiding other rogues in their escape (at least certain ones. They aren’t helping joker no matter what he offers)

It’s driving the bats mad. They have vigilantes stationed in each hall, in multiple monitor rooms.

They aren’t even using anything clever to block the cameras. They’re using mirrors. Mirrors! Where did they even get so many handheld mirrors! 

They are running circles around the bats. The escaped rogues literally aren’t doing anything yet because they want to see how the three hellions will escape the entire bat clan. They have bets going. So there is a temporary truce.

Just imagine the conversations/interrogations the bats will have with trio, trying to figure out their master plan - because surely there's something more going on than three chaos young adults playing a game, right?

They trio each have a different story. And they are so passionate/convincing actors that no one knows which story is real. At least one of them told a sob story with legitimate tears.

Danny: (all mysterious) You shall never know our master plan….until it is too late. And just casually dropping hints that there is something greater or that the bats are playing right into their hands. Even using ridiculous scenarios like yesss the ketchup explosion in the cafeteria….We are one step further….Mwa ha ha! (Rubs his hands together)

Sam: (absolutely distraught with literal tears running down her face and ruining her mascara.) There is a terrible organization holding their parents hostage. They had been framed and forced to be in Arkham. If they don’t do exactly as they are told, their loved ones are in danger! Should we stay? Should we escape and help them!? No one will believe us and what if we make things worse? We don’t know what to do!

Tucker: (takes a long slurp of a smoothie. Where he got one? No one knows). Yeah we were bored and had nothing better to do than mess with you guys. (Sluuuuurp).

The bats are trying to figure it out. Is the black haired guy telling the truth and the other two are just manipulating them? Is it the girl and the others are only following the plot of the organization? IS THE BARET KID RIGHT AND THEY’RE JUST MESSING WITH US!? WHICH STORY IS IT!?

Under normal circumstances, Sam wouldn’t give a sob story because It’s not really her vibe. But Sam has the opportunity to pull one over on a bat. Do you honestly think she won’t take a chance to mess with them? Also, Dick is the one who is interrogating Sam.

He’s crying too by the end of the story.

Poor guy, Sam will play his heart like a fiddle. 

Also, their fake identities are Jordan for Danny. Mortica for Sam (or Macey for short) and Phineas for Tucker. The fact that they are using fake identities is the only thing they all agree on in the interview. But the bats find nothing on them and the identities are so realistic they wonder if they are even fake at all. If the three are faking fake IDs to throw them off their tail from looking deeper. Apparently their ‘parents’ having a missing persons report.

Damian is interrogating Danny. It’s just so easy to rile him up and get under his skin. It’s absolute drama in that interrogation room. 

Danny: ah yessss. Master plan.

Damian: you shall never succeed! Justice shall prevail evil scum!

And Duke is interrogating Tucker. He just…has no idea how to respond to this. He wasn’t trained for this response. Hostile, yes. Mysterious, yes. Scared, yes. Civilian, yes. Even Flirtatious! YES! But not…this. What does he do? should he take out his note cards?

Also, I’m adding a mix of home alone elements to this. They have to get past the bats somehow and it can’t be lethal. Poor Jason and Steph who are patrolling the halls fall victim to most of this.

At one point, both of them are tied up together and hanging from the ceiling. While the trio just casually walk by under them. 

It’s dental floss. Really strong dental floss.

Then the bats start taking sides. 

Jason? once he hears Sam's story, he's immediately willing to help her. He and Dick are searching for that missing person's report almost religiously.

Tim believes Danny's story. part of it is because it makes the most sense, and the other part is that he's slightly biased from becoming an evil megalomaniac in every timeline he's seen so he's subconsciously trying to stop that from happening here.

Cass believes Tucker because come on, it's Cass.

Steph is siding with Tim because her father was cluemaster so same reasons.

Bruce is trying to fact check all of them and is failing desperately.

Sam added some ‘clues’ in her interrogation and basically threw the GIW under the bus as the organization. So the bats do find a shady organization but so far no missing persons so the other bats still don’t know if what Sam is saying is true or not while Dick takes this as absolute proof and Jason feels like it doesn’t matter if she’s telling the truth at this point. It’s a corrupt organization. So he’ll still blow it up.

I think in this AU, the GIW isn’t a threat and more of an annoyance so Sam just plays them up as even worse. Like, she doesn’t say anything untrue just makes it sound worse out of context. Oh yeah, they opened fire on this random kid. (Gregory when they thought he was phantom) Oh yes, they have destroyed Danny’s house at one point. (The prank war with Vlad) Yes, the have an unhealthy obsession with dissecting people. (Even though they are too incompetent to actually catch anyone).

So again, they don’t know if Sam is telling the truth of the organization or they just used this random organization to draw their attention away from the three’s plans (as Danny implied). Possibly an enemy organization or a competitor.

I know everyone makes the GIW a big threat but I decided to change it up. They aren’t a threat but still get obliterated by a pissed off Red Hood and Nightwing.

And that’s  another reason why Sam gives the sob story. Danny and Tucker are great but they wouldn’t actually sick a crime lord on the GIW. Sam? Absolutely would. She does not care what happens to them. They tore up her garden one time with a stray shot. She wants revenge. And sure, she didn’t actually know what would happen to them after the bats find out but she still doesn’t care.

And through all of this, the rogues are sitting back and eating popcorn while Joker screams bloody murder from his cell. 

[yuwuta]

gojo would kill your work husband. but if he were the work husband, that's a different story

REAL!! he’s such a hypocrite because if someone mentioned you had a work husband, his entire world would stop and he wold devise the absolute worst plans to make sure that your co-worker, everyone at your job, and everyone in the next building over knew that he was happily committed to you 

but if he is the work husband, he’s very........ dutiful in his role. there’s a loose office/lawyer au in my head where satoru is your secretary, and for all intents and purposes, your personal assistant, and he’s good at his job, but mostly because he considers his job to be pleasing you. he has coffee for you when you arrive, he moves your schedule around without you asking, he has answers to questions before you can even ask them, he has fresh flowers on your desk weekly, pokes into your meetings to pretend to hand you a file that’s really just maybe a single document in a manilla folder with candy on top of it—he’s made himself your business, your partner; he’s made himself irreplaceable, and he loves to remind everybody of that fact. 

he’s also extremely loyal. sure, he could day a week’s worth of work done in about a day, but that doesn’t mean he’ll just use his talents for anybody. he’s your secretary, so he’s at your beck and call, and everyone knows it. they know he’s the best, but also that he’s off limits—not because you won’t share him, but because satoru won’t let himself be shared. 

he also extends his duties beyond work, of course. when he hands you a print out of your schedule for the day and you’re confused by the three-hour block of time you have in the middle of the day, satoru just helps you shrug your coat of your shoulders and smiles, “that’s for the lunch date you have with me, of course!” hanging up your coat in your closet for you, “i’m paying, see you soon, sweets.” and because you’re great at your job, and satoru helps you be great, nobody really questions when the two of you have time for a 13-course tasting menu at 1pm on a tuesday afternoon. and if they did, all satoru would say that you two had a lovely date 

[ky-landfill]

[batbabydamian]

DC August 2024 Solicitations - Comics Featuring Damian! 🦇

THE BOY WONDER #4 of 5

8/7/24

Written by Juni Ba

Art and Cover by Juni Ba

Variant Cover: Valentina Napolitano

Damian Wayne may have been struggling to live up to his father’s legacy…but the last thing he ever wanted was to be returned to the clutches of his grandfather, the Demon King. But when his worst nightmare comes true, can he rely on his mother to defend him? Or has he lost her forever to the same horrific legacy he’s tried to escape?

BATMAN AND ROBIN #12

8/14/24

Written by Joshua Williamson

Art by Juan Ferreyra

Cover by Simone Di Meo

Variant covers: Juan Ferreyra, Vasco Georgiev (1:25), Simone Di Meo (Batman 85th Anniversary)

Years ago, Bane killed Alfred Pennyworth right in front of Damian. And now, on Dinosaur Island, there is nothing stopping Robin from getting his revenge! Except his father, Batman! And the giant dinosaurs, of course.

DC VS. VAMPIRES: WORLD WAR V #1

8/14/24

Written by Matthew Rosenburg

Art and cover by Otto Schmidt

Variant Covers: Jae Lee, Steve Beach, Homare, Riley Rossmo (1:25), Nikola Cizmesija (1:50)

The smash-hit series returns! It’s the dead of winter, and any hope for a fragile truce between the Green Arrow-led human heroes and vampire queen Barbara Gordon’s army has been dashed by Damian Wayne and his guerrilla fighters. He’s the only one fighting back against the bloodthirsty hordes, leaving Green Arrow with a choice: Does he stand and fight or sacrifice the boy in the name of peace?

WONDER WOMAN #12

8/21/24

Written by Tom King

Art by Tony S. Daniel and Belen Ortega

Cover by Daniel Sampere

Variant Covers: Tony S. Daniel, Jorge Fornes, Julian Totino Tedesco, Guillem March

Meet the new dynamic duo! Wonder Woman teams up with the unlikeliest of allies, Robin, on a top secret mission to save their fellow heroes. Will Damian and Diana’s quest to break into Waller’s Gamorra supermax prison be a successful one? Or is it all part of a more elaborate trap for Wonder Woman and her new sidekick?

SUPER-PETS SPECIAL: BITEDENTITY CRISIS*

*Damian mentioned in summary

7/30/24

Written by Tony Fleecs, Alexis Quasarano, Michael Conrad, Dan Watters, and Kyle Starks

Art by Mike Norton, PJ Holden, Sami Basri, Chris Mitten, and Kyle Starks

The Super-Pets are back—and this time, they’re all BITE! Haley, the beloved bark-out star of NIGHTWING, finds herself to be a fish out of water when she arrives on Kent Farm. As our big-city mutt tries to adjust to country living, she’s shocked to discover a kennel of courageous critters is already waiting for her! Bitewing, meet the SUPER-PETS—and you might want to hold on tight because things are about to get hairy! Also featuring—stories of misch-woof and mutt-hem! The dark side of the dog bed! The many pets of Damian Wayne! You’ll have to squeak it to believe it!

[triasticalwarlock]

I SCREAMED HIS NAME WHEN I SAW HIM. AT THE TOP OF MY LUGS, I WASN'T EXPECTING HIM TO JUST SHOW UP LIKE THAT 💀

[hyacinthsdiamonds]

Ted saying that no driver has had this level of attention on them since Michael Schumacher...

Gentlemen, a short view into the past; Max's debut season, his Red Bull debut, the literal rule changed as a result of his debut in the sport... oh and everyone and their mother calling Kimi Max 2.0 and Toto's second chance at signing debut!Max since he failed the first time around...

[hallowclave]

She para on my humans till I [GRUESOME SOUNDS OF BUG FUELED VIOLENCE]

Redraw of a skitter design I did a little over a year ago, comparison under the read more

And the sketch. As a little treat. Just for you.

[kacievvbbbb]

Honestly despite my feelings about how the last arc of MHA went down I really love Deku and his story.

I just feel like a lot of the time we get these protagonists whose whole philosophy is it doesn’t matter what you were born as everyone can achieve greatness. But then the series goes on and it turns out that actually it DOES matter because the protagonist has this really great lineage and these really great powers you can only have through birth they were actually born born, predestined if you will, to do this.

But MHA actually sticks to its guns. Midoriya wasn’t revealed to have some great connection to all might that the universe had put in place. He wasn’t defended from some great lineage that makes him uniquely suited to this. Hell All for one didn’t even turn out to be his father, there was no hidden powerful quirk he was always meant to have. He was just Midoriya Izuku a boy who was in the right place at the right time and simply decided to act while the world did nothing. And that’s what really made him a hero.

I don’t know, maybe it’s just me, but I believe him a bit more when he goes anybody can be a hero if you just decide to act

[irregularbillcipher]

so god forbid i’m seen just as an average human being

[43sol]

glad they implemented the ‘skipping the scenes you already got’ option. don’t have to speed run hahaha

[kabutoden]

GOLD RULE--BROWNBLOOD

Crimkt

A brownblood toddler. Their lusus, direwolfdad, was eager to take on a charge and hid how sick it was. They are one of Melosa’s wards, and she’s asked other troll kids living in the complex’s bottom layer to check on them daily. They only know their first name.

Sign of early spring(late winter). Page of Space. Camel Cricket Morph.

2 sweeps: 4 years.

[batcavescolony]

What ever you do don't think about Percy reading Estelle a little kid version of 'The Odyssey' because that's what Sally read to him but he doesn't want to scare her. Don't imagine Sally looking on with guilt in her eyes cus she HAD to read him the real one so he knew what to expect. Don't think about Sally looking down on her little girl with tears in her eyes cus she doesn't need to worry about snakes in her bed or teachers being Cyclopes. Don't think of Sally seeing Estelle with Paul and having to leave the room cus when Percy was that age they had Gabe. Don't think of the unimaginable guilt that Sally must feel for being relieved that Estelle's biggest battle at 16, is her Dad being her teacher. And whatever you do don't think about Percy feeling like an outsider in his own family even though he gets constantly reassured that he's part of it and loved.

[ofna]

Hey everyone, sorry for the silence! I’m in consulting and have sadly been stuck working crazy hours since I got promoted in October

I also got married 2 weeks ago (!!) so I have not had much free time to write on the weekends either. It was 3 separate days of ceremonies and a lot of fun, but I’ll be happy to never do anything like that ever again

I actually just got back and started some edits for an additional branch in the last chapter (staying in alone instead of going out with everyone else). Chapter 8 is also about 30% done according to my outline, although it’s been a hot minute since I’ve been in there

Sorry for the lack of communication. For me, the longer I go without progress, the more pressure I feel to have ✨huge news✨ and a definite date for new content before I post anything at all again. I know it’s frustrating when authors drop off the face of the earth, apologies 💗

Tentatively, I hope to finish up the next chapter by the end of July 🤞

[puppetmaster13u]

More about Meat Marionette Au

 Thinkin of lil Robin and all of them being very fluffy with like, almost down mixed with fur and softer larvae-like chitin. Way softer than Bruce’s chitin that can take some ridiculously solid hits before cracking. Bruce gets so stressed when Dick gets his secondary body because like?? Small child with?? Large blade?? On the end of a tail?? And long claws??? This kid is like, nine at most and has very sharp blades now that can’t be taken away. He’s so very stressed. 

 I like to think the robins all vary in size by like a few inches but they’re all child-sized just so they can sneak around easily and hide in the Bat’s back. Plus then Bruce can pluck them up whenever they decide to try and sneak out or attack someone lol

This is a combo of my cryptid batfam au & @phoenixcatch7's Possessed Doll au, which is amazing and you need to check it out if you aren't aware of it <3

[wildernessuntothemselves]

I'm a blonde gyu hater actually

[dkettchen]