#we need menace charles back i think

[hrhrg]

Alonso and Stroll dynamic to me is like supervillain and his goon/baby protege

[gallusrostromegalus]

The Van Has Officially Declared It Spooky Season

---

I've got my parent's van for the week and it seems determined to establish my status as The Local Cryptid by terrorizing an innocent 7-11 clerk.

...I might need to back up a bit.

My mother is an eminently sensible woman who knows herself well, and when The Plauge hit, she knew she'd need some sort of mentally and physically engaging craft project to keep herself from going insane and massacring the local zoning and water management boards (even if they have it coming). So she and Dad acquired a utility van and converted it into a camper van because while they love camping, they're past the age where their joints and immune systems will tolerate sleeping on the cold ground in a nylon tent.

They did a terrific job of it and my mom taught herself woodworking and carpentry and now the van has it's own cabinets, fold-away dining table, and removable queen-sized bed with memory foam mattress. My Dad was already a computer engineer, but he learned the dark magics of automotive software and electronics to install after-market backup cameras, a media player that would take a terabyte hard drive and a solar-powered battery and outlet so they could wake up and just turn on the kettle and griddle for breakfast without having to exit the van into a cold morning on an empty stomach.

Truly, the height of Camping Luxury.

My parents are both in their mid-seventies and my primary life goal is to be at least half as cool and hale as they are when I get old.

Anyway, they take it out at least a dozen times a year and it works fabulously, but, being as I am on good terms with my parents and also finishing the process of moving house, I've been borrowing it to move large and cumbersome objects that will not fit in the back of my equally lovely but minuscule Honda hatchback.

It's a Great Van. Very easy and comfortable to drive. Stunningly good MPG for it's size. The best cruise control I've ever had in a car.

It's just also. Quirky. Mischievous, even.

---

If this van has a fault its that it bears the unfortunate affliction that all lightly used white utility vans have in that the combination of an utter lack of branding features and the large dent/scrape I accidentally put on it while trying to escape a Denny's last Thanksgiving means that this vehicle is one addition of a Badly Spray-Painted "FREE CANDY" on the side away from being the sort of vehicle you see in an edgy horror movie.

It's got the same issue that Doberman Dogs have where they look like the sort of creature that likes to snack on toddler's faces whilst actually having personalities made of marshmallow fluff. This vehicle is unnecessarily menacing and I think nothing short of an airbrushed Epic Van Wizard will correct this. People see this van pull up and lean over and squint suspiciously at me when the driver's side door opens, and then look moderately confused when, instead of Charles Manson, a small, potato-shaped creature with neon purple hair and a statistically unlikely assortment of dogs emerges.

My own two dogs, Herschel the Hanukkah Goblin/Corgi and Charleston Chew The Taco Dumpster Dog, Do Not Like The Van. Even with the bed in it, they have a tendency to slide and roll around in the back, and both WILL chew through dog saftey belts or other attempts to secure them in there.

On the other hand, my house mate's dog, an exceptionally tall standard poodle whom we lovingly call "The Creature", loves the Van because SHE wears her doggy seat-belt with only mild complaining and gets to sit up in the passenger seat like A People.

Also like A People, The Creature likes to stand and walk around on her hind legs. It doesn't hurt her and it's entirely voluntary, but every so often I will feel a hand on my arm and instead of my husband or friend, it's a canine that's taller than I am on her hind legs who wants to stare at my face with soulful, concerned eyes. The Creature's favorite thing is that she is exactly the right height for me to hold her arm in Genteel Fashion and walk around the pet food or hardware store with her like I'm a count escorting a debutante around a royal ball.

---

As it stands, I am set to inherit this vehicle whenever my Honda gives up the ghost, and I fully intend to paint an Epic Van Wizard on it when that time comes.

The other peculiarity of The Van is that while Dad did manage to successfully install all his after-market electronics, not all the electronics get along. Sometimes, they fight for Dominance. The Terabyte Music Player and the Backup Camera have a particularly contentious relationship, and turning on the music has about a 25% chance of turning on the backup camera as well, and turning on the Backup Camera is equally likely to turn on the music.

Firthermore, The Van has a favorite song.

I am not kidding that Dad filled an entire terabyte hard drive with music and the software to sort it via the radio controls, but of all the Early Boomer Dad Rock (Kingston Trio over The Eagles) and Irish Folk and Symphonies and the entire discography of Weird Al Yankovic, The Van's favorite song- The one it picks to play as victory music every time it beats the Backup Camera at their weird electronic game of rock-paper-scissors -is The Liberty Bell March by John Phillip Sousa.

You all know this song already.

...but in case you've forgotten the tune:

Yeah.

The Van's favorite song is the goddamn Monty Python's Flying Circus Theme Music.

It does not play this song at a normal volume.

Every time I turn on the Backup Camera and it manages to turn the music player on as well, The Van insists on absolutely blasting this nonsense on at the maximum volume it's physically capable of producing, which I know is loud enough to be heard from the Denver International Airport's Pickup zone when they Van decided to start playing it from the economy lot about half a mile away.

Perhaps it's The Van's way of honoring the aesthetic sensibilities and sonic enthusiasm of Mr. Sousa.

...I can't help but wonder if the purpose of an Epic Van Wizard is to control this sort of faerie-like malarkey, and channel these chaotic energies into things like Spell of Don't Break Down In Nevada or Enchantment Of Always Have Good Parking.

---

So last Friday the 13th, I get a call from my friend and housemate, at said airport.

It's roughly 11PM at night, and I have already retired for the evening. I am in the exact minimum of clothing required to be a decent housemate and not scandalize the neighbors should I happen to walk by a window. My feet are up. There is a cat in my lap and fictional British people murdering each other in highly inventive fashion on the tv. -But my friend has returned from her friend's wedding,and either American or United Airlines has managed to lose her luggage, including, among other valuable possessions, the keys to her car. ...So she cannot just drive home as originally planned.

There are, as luck would have it, her spare set of keys not eight feet from me.

Being a good and decent person, I agree to bring the spare keys to her so she may get home before daybreak and not spend a semester's worth of tuition on an uber across the greater Denver traffic jam.

Being also that she Loves Activities, and it's her mom we're going to pick up, I elect to take along The Creature.

I am primarily focused on remembering how to get to the airport and not leaving my friend's spare keys on the counter, so I throw on a pair of flip-flops, step outside, remember that it's AUTUMN and my minimal evening attire is not sufficient thermal protection, step back in, grab the first coat in the closet I lay hands on, pull it on, check that I have her keys again and leave.

The trip to the airport is largely unremarkable, save that it becomes necessary for me to put on sunglasses to drive, despite it being nearly the witching hour and almost entirely darker than the inside of a cow.

It's necessary because this blissful darkness of night is violently punctured by a startling number of cars that seem to have installed miniaturized but no less powerful lighthouse bulbs in where their headlights ought to go so the oncoming traffic and sports cars that insist on tailgating me in the slow lane alike illuminate the road and my mirrors with the kind of radiance I'd normally associate with the arrival of a Seraphim.

I arrive at the distant highly discounted airport car lot where my housemate is waiting, deeply apologetic. It's nothing. I say. Once I see that your car starts up, I'm gonna go to that 7-11 across the way that I parked in front of, get a slurpee or something and I'll see you at home.

While she is retrieving her vehicle (an equally eccentric but much more stately Subaru that is old enough to be elected to congress) I rifle through the loose change in the glove box and discover that I have exactly $6.66 in small bills and coins. The Subaru, continuing it's long voyage into vehicular immortality, immediately starts up.

Upon her return, we all remember that my friend had all her camping gear in the backseat of the car and there is no room for The Creature to ride home with her parent, so I again assure her it's nothing, and will just take The Creature into the 7-11 with me. She is trained as a service animal and needs the practice after the plague.

I wave my friend off and turn to enter the 7-11.

I promptly trip over the jutting back bumper of The Van and fall, cartoonishly, face-first onto the sidewalk.

Fortunately, I have a lot of practice falling on my face, and have learned not to throw my hands out but instead cover my face, so my unexpected self-inflicted attempted curb-stomping lightly scrapes my hairline and nothing else -my sunglasses even stay in place- and I get up and resume my quest for a slurpee.

It's well known that the airport is a lawless place, and the 7-11 across from the discounted airport parking at the stroke of midnight is no exception.

I know it's the stroke of Midnight because there's one of those Audubon society bird-call clocks that makes bird noises, and my arrival is heralded by the twittering call of a Summer Tanager. I am almost charmed enough by the unusual choice of chronological device to excuse the exorbitant Airport-adjacent mark-up of Slurpee prices. I stand at the machine for some time, trying to decide on a size for the price and guess what the fuck "Blue Lighting Blast" is supposed to taste like.

The Creature is being Very Polite but is somewhat agitated, I assume because she *just* saw her mother for the first time in three days and then she LEFT with no explanation, so The Creature is on her hind legs, staring woefully into my eyes, asking to be escorted around the 7-11. Even though that's not what she's not supposed to be doing, there's nobody else in here, so I let her hang off my arm and discuss various Slurpee Flavor options with her.

We eventually decide on an experiment in which I try a Small Blue Lightning Blast, and discover it tastes a bit like licking a nintendo cartridge but in a pleasantly satisfying way.

I go up to pay and realize something is amiss.

The Cashier is a young man staring at me with wide eyes, one had over the register and the other wrapped up in his rosary.

I look down at myself.

In my haste to reunite my friend with her spare keys and service animal, I had left the house in the following accoutrements:

Flip Flops. Not matching. It's below freezing outside. That last part is not particularly odd footwear for the weather in for Colorado, but it's an important detail for the rest of the ensemble.

Assorted scrapes, bruises, cuts and welts on my arms and legs that come with doing outdoor work and living in a house with three dogs and a fully-clawed cat that all want to be in my lap all the time. It's cold out, so vasoconstriction has pulled the blood away from my skin, a trait that served my ancestors well during the last Ice Age, but leaves me with pale skin to contrast the various wounds and I look like a corpse that fell out of the back of a pickup truck.

The black Bootyshorts with "CRYPTID" painted in bright red gothic font across my ass, that @theshitpostcalligrapher gave me for my wedding present.

A peculiar but extremely comfortable garment that straddles the line between "Lacy Camisole" and "Industrial-Strength Sports Bra" like the Ever Given straddling the Suez Canal. It is also Bright Red. with black accents.

The Jacket I had grabbed out of the closet, which is in fact, a black Velour Dinner Jacket.

The Tokyo-Ghoul inspired reusable anti-covid mask a friend made me with the set of Coyote Teeth.

My sunglasses, which are shaped like a Halloween Bat. The lenses are the wings and the body is the nose bridge. It is ALSO bright red.

A Very Large and remarkably Humanoid Poodle that I have been audibly affectionately calling "Dear Creature" who is hanging off my arm like she's my Prom Date.

The Very Large and remarkably Humanoid Poodle is ALSO dressed up in a black Dog Sweater that has white bones printed on it to look like its an X-ray jacket showing off her skeleton.

I look like I am taking my Very Fancy Werewolf Girlfriend to a particularly casual Dinner Party for Vampires, but the thing that's really selling it and probably alarming the kid the most is the fun accessory I acquired in the parking lot not five minutes earlier:

The "Small Scrape At my Hairline" is actually a painless but PROFUSELY bleeding head wound that I had somehow entirely failed to notice covering my face, neck, decolletage and magnificent cleavage with blood like a Tarantino Film Extra.

This does explain why The Creature has been delicately trying to use her bodyweight to push me down onto the floor for the last ten minutes. So I don't injure myself while we wait for the paramedics she hoped this kid called to arrive, you see.

The Creature has such a High and Naive Opinion of humanity.

I decide this social situation is already fucked, and the only way out is through, and with haste, before I start dripping on the floor.

"Hi there!" I say cheerfully, to indicate this is a visually alarming but not terribly serious situation. "Just a Small Slurpee!"

The Cashier has entered the relevant code into the register before I finish the sentence. His gaze flicks off me just long enough to look at the total, and he grips his Rosary harder.

$6.66

"Oh cool! I have exact change!" I say, taking the money out of my as-yet-unsanguined pocket without looking and slap it down on the counter. "You have a good night and be safe out there!" I wave, leaving.

I get in The Van, mortified, buckle The Creature up, and as I make to leave, I have to put it in reverse, which automatically turns on the backup Camera.

It also turns on the music player.

I make eye contact with the cashier as the dulcet tones of John Phillip Sousa boom from the van hard enough to make the windshield and the windows of the 7-11 rattle for the nine-and-a-half seconds I have to wait to be able to turn the volume back down. Not knowing what else to to, I give him a thumbs up, and leave.

Anyway, now I know what my Future Van Wizard has got to be dressed like, and what their familiar is.

---

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[pucksandpower]

Blow Out the Candles

Charles Leclerc x birthday girl!Reader

Summary: the many ways that you and Charles celebrate your birthday throughout the years

Warnings: vague depictions of childbirth and labor

It’s my birthday today so this is my gift to you 🫶

You let out a long sigh as you lean back against the cold concrete wall of the holding cell. This is not exactly how you pictured spending your birthday weekend.

The heavy steel door clangs shut behind you, the sound echoing in the cramped space. Looking around, you take in the sparse furnishings — a bench along one wall, a grimy leaking sink in the corner, and a single window so dirty that it barely lets in any light.

Charming.

You hear voices and footsteps approaching. Keys jangle and the door swings open again. A police officer steps aside and another person stumbles into the cell.

He looks to be about your age or a little older, with messy brown hair and a bewildered expression. The officer mumbles something about “sorting this out shortly” before slamming the door closed once more.

The new arrival blinks in confusion before noticing you sitting on the bench. “Oh! Sorry, I didn’t see you there,” he says with an accent you can’t quite place. French, maybe? He runs a hand through his tousled hair sheepishly.

You give a wry smile. “Don’t worry about it. I take it you’re joining me for the complimentary holding cell experience?”

He chuckles, leaning back against the wall across from you. “Yeah, something like that. I’m Charles.”

“Y/N,” you reply. “Nice to meet you, cellmate.”

Charles grins, and you can’t help but notice how his nose crinkles up when he smiles. It’s kind of adorable. “The pleasure is mine,” he says gallantly, giving a theatrical little bow that makes you laugh.

“So Charles, what terrible crime did you commit to land yourself in this lovely establishment?” You ask with mock seriousness.

He smirks. “Would you believe me if I said jaywalking?”

You raise an eyebrow. “Seriously?”

“Seriously,” he confirms. “I was trying to get to the bakery before they sold out of croissants. I may have darted across the street … outside of the crosswalk.” He shakes his head ruefully. “The things I do for pastries.”

You have to laugh. “A real menace to society, you are.”

He grins again. “What about you? Don’t tell me you’re in for armed robbery or something.”

“Me? No way,” you scoff. “I was taking the metro downtown and I may have … accidentally used an expired metro card. The transit cops dragged me off at the next stop. I tried to explain it was an honest mistake but they weren’t having it.”

“Ah, a hardened criminal!” Charles exclaims in mock horror, eyes twinkling with amusement.

“Clearly. Us lawbreakers need to stick together,” you joke.

You both erupt into laughter, the sound ringing brightly in the dreary holding cell.

As your laughter subsides, Charles regards you curiously. “So do you make a habit of riding the metro with expired cards, Y/N?”

You make a face. “No, I just grabbed the wrong card in my wallet this morning. I was rushing to get downtown and didn’t even think to check.”

“Why were you in such a hurry?”

You hesitate. The real reason seems kind of silly now that you’re stuck in a jail cell. “It’s my birthday today,” you explain with a self-conscious shrug. “I was meeting some friends for brunch downtown to celebrate. Guess I’m going to be late for that.”

“It’s your birthday?” Charles’ eyes widen. “Well, happy birthday!”

You crack a smile. “Thanks.”

“I’m sorry you got stuck in here for your birthday,” he says sympathetically. “That really sucks.”

You give another shrug. “Honestly, this will make for a pretty funny story later. Not exactly how I wanted to spend today, but what can you do?”

Charles nods thoughtfully. A moment later his face lights up. “I know what we can do! Since we’re stuck in this lovely cell, we should have our own little birthday celebration. I can sing for you!”

You raise your eyebrows, surprised but charmed by the offer. “Really? You don’t have to do that.”

“It’s your birthday, of course I do!” He insists.

Clearing his throat theatrically, he launches into an enthusiastic, if not exactly tuneful, rendition of “Happy Birthday.”

His voice echoes off the concrete walls as he gesticulates dramatically, getting really into it by the second verse. You can’t help giggling as he puts his whole heart into hitting the high notes.

By the time he finishes with a flourish, you’re both laughing again.

“That was amazing, thank you,” you tell him, still chuckling.

He gives an exaggerated bow. “My pleasure, birthday girl. Sorry I don’t have a cake to go with the song.”

You grin. “That’s okay. 10 out of 10 performance.”

Charles smiles, looking adorably pleased with himself.

You regard him thoughtfully. “You know, you really didn’t have to do that. Singing for a total stranger in a holding cell.”

He shrugs. “I wanted to. You seemed like you could use a pick-me-up.”

“Well, it worked. I definitely feel better.” You study him for a moment. “You’re pretty strange, Charles.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” he laughs.

You shake your head amusedly. You have to admit, you’re really enjoying his company. For someone you just met under bizarre circumstances, he’s remarkably easy to talk to.

Charles checks his watch. “I hope they let us out of here soon. Those croissants are calling my name.”

“And I’ve got mimosas waiting for me,” you add.

As if on cue, footsteps sound outside. You both look up expectantly as keys rattle in the lock.

The door swings open and the officer from before steps in. “Alright you two, come with me. We got it all sorted out, you’re free to go.”

You share a relieved look with Charles as you both follow the officer out. After a quick stop to collect your belongings, you step outside into the sunshine.

Charles turns to you with a smile. “Well, it was very nice to meet you, Y/N. Happy birthday again!”

“Thanks, Charles.” You smile warmly at your strange but lovely cellmate. “This turned out to be a pretty memorable birthday after all.”

He looks pleased. “I’m glad I could help make it special. Enjoy the rest of your day!”

With a little wave he heads off down the street, presumably in search of those croissants. You watch him go, struck by an impulse.

“Charles, wait up!” You call out, jogging to catch up with him.

He turns, looking at you curiously.

“I just wanted to say thanks again for making a crappy situation fun,” you tell him sincerely. “And, if you want, you’re welcome to come join me and my friends for brunch.”

His eyes light up in surprise. “Really?”

You nod. “It’s the least I can do after you serenaded me in jail,” you joke. “Plus, I’m sure the restaurant will have croissants.”

Charles smiles broadly. “Well in that case, I would love to.”

“Great!” You beam, linking your arm through his. “Let’s get out of here.”

***

You sink back into the plush leather seat, gazing out the jet’s window at the twinkling stars dotting the endless expanse of sky. This is definitely a step up from last year’s jail cell birthday celebration.

“Champagne, ma’am?”

You smile up at the flight attendant as she offers you a crystal flute. “Yes please!”

Charles grins at you from across the cabin. “And please keep it coming, my girlfriend deserves to be spoiled on her birthday.”

You still get butterflies every time he calls you his girlfriend. This past year with Charles has been amazing. After that fateful day, he easily slotted himself into your life. What started as an impromptu brunch turned into real dates, which turned into a real relationship. You’ve never clicked with someone so quickly or felt so comfortable so soon.

Now here you are, celebrating your birthday at 11,000 meters aboard a private jet chartered from one of Ferrari’s sponsors. You had balked at the extravagance at first, but Charles insisted. “It’s your special day, we have to do something incredible!”

You take a sip of crisp champagne, the bubbles tickling your nose. “So where exactly are we headed?”

Charles has kept your destination a surprise. “You’ll see soon, birthday girl,” he says with a wink.

You pretend to pout. “Fine, keep your secrets.”

He just laughs. “Trust me, it’s going to be an amazing trip.”

You don’t doubt it. Charles has a knack for making every day feel special and fun. Even just being cooped up in this plane with him feels like an adventure.

As the flight continues, you enjoy a decadent five course dinner complete with even more champagne and chocolate-dipped strawberries. Charles keeps you laughing with silly stories and jokes. By the time you finish eating you have to stifle a yawn behind your hand.

“Someone’s getting sleepy,” Charles teases.

“It’s been a long exciting day!” You say through another yawn.

Charles grins and hits the call button. A flight attendant appears instantly. “Yes sir?”

“I think it’s time to get the birthday girl to bed,” Charles says.

The attendant nods and pulls back a partition, revealing a plush bedroom suite.

Your eyes widen in delighted surprise. “Wha … we can sleep in an actual bed on the plane?”

“Only the best for you,” Charles says, planting a kiss on your forehead.

You happily snuggle under the covers in the sumptuous bed, sighing contentedly. “Okay, this is an amazing birthday present.”

Charles chuckles, sliding in beside you and pulling you close. “The fun is only beginning, mon cœur.”

Within minutes you’re sound asleep curled up in his arms.

Sometime later you stir slowly awake, momentarily confused. The bedroom is dark and Charles is shaking your shoulder gently.

“Wake up, chérie. It’s almost midnight!” He says excitedly.

You rub your eyes and peer blearily at the clock. 11:58 pm. “Why, what happens at midnight?”

“Your birthday starts again!”

You look at him blankly, still not fully awake.

He grins. “We just crossed into a new time zone. Which means ...” He pauses for dramatic effect. “I get to be the first to wish you happy birthday again!”

As it clicks you start laughing. Only Charles would come up with something so adorable. You watch the clock count down the last seconds to midnight as he bounces giddily on the bed.

“Happy birthday!” Charles exclaims right on cue, tackling you in a hug.

You hug him back, still laughing. “You’re crazy, but thank you.”

He beams down at you. “I have so much planned, it’s going to take more than one time zone to celebrate properly.”

Over the next few hours, you dip in and out of sleep as Charles wakes you at each new midnight. Every time he sings and wishes you happy birthday again with infectious enthusiasm. By the fifth round you’re both delirious and silly from lack of sleep, belting out drunk duets of “Happy Birthday” and collapsing into giggles.

Finally he lets you sleep through until morning. When you emerge from the bedroom, blinking in the bright daylight, you gasp. Out the window is an ocean of clouds and in the distance, a tiny island just coming into view.

You turn to Charles with wide eyes. “Are we … is that ...”

He grins and wraps his arms around you. “Welcome to St. Barts! I wanted your birthday to be paradise.”

“Every day with you is paradise.” You kiss him soundly. “Thank you, this is the most magical birthday I could’ve imagined.”

Charles trails his fingers over your cheek. “You deserve magic every single day. I’m just doing my part to make sure you get it.”

***

You stir awake to soft kisses trailing down your neck. Opening your eyes, you find Charles gazing down at you, his brown hair endearingly rumpled.

“Happy birthday, mon ange,” he whispers before capturing your lips in a sweet kiss.

You hum contentedly, running your fingers through his messy locks. “Mmm, now this is a nice way to wake up.”

Charles gives you his signature crinkly-nosed grin. “I have so much planned for your special day.”

Your heart flutters happily. After two amazing years with Charles, the connection between the two of you feels more intense than ever. You can’t wait to celebrate.

But his smile turns apologetic. “Well, so much planned for after the car launch.”

You nod in understanding. Charles has commitments. And today the new Scuderia Ferrari car is being unveiled in a highly anticipated event.

Charles kisses your pouting lip. “I’m so sorry, ma belle. I wish I could get out of it but-”

“Shh, it’s okay,” you assure him, silencing his worries with a kiss. “I know how important the launch is for the team. I’ll just miss you today.”

“I’ll miss you too. But I promise, as soon as it’s over I’m all yours.”

You spend a blissful morning lazing in bed, laughing over crepes Charles attempts to make for your birthday breakfast. Flour ends up more on him than in the pan, but you happily eat the lumpy results.

Too soon it’s time for Charles to leave for the launch. At the door he pulls you into his arms. “I love you. This evening will be perfect, I swear.”

You smile up at him. “Love you too. Go show off that new car.”

After one more lingering kiss he’s off. You distract yourself by meeting local friends for birthday lunch. But your mind keeps drifting to Charles. You hope the event is going well for him.

By mid afternoon you’re back in Charles’ Maranello apartment, curled up on the couch watching silly movies. You’ve just bitten into a slice of birthday cake when your phone rings.

It’s Charles FaceTiming you, his handsome face filling the screen. “Hi, mon amour!”

You grin at your adorable fiancé. “Hey you! How’s the launch going?”

“It’s good!” His eyes drop to your plate. “Are you eating cake without me?” He gasps in mock outrage.

You giggle. “Only a tiny cheat slice. Don’t worry, there’s plenty left for when you’re home.”

Voices sound faintly behind Charles and he glances over his shoulder. “Ah, the program is starting again soon. I just wanted to see your beautiful face.”

You blow him a kiss. “Knock ‘em dead, baby.”

“I love you!” He says before the call ends.

Snuggling back into the couch, you focus on the movie again. But a notification keeps pinging on your phone. You glance over to see texts flooding in from Charles.

Can you watch the livestream?

The link is all over social media

It’s starting again soon 😘

You go on Instagram and click the link curiously. The livestream shows an auditorium packed with press, Ferrari team members, fans, and VIPs. Cameras flash as Charles takes the stage along with his teammate and team principal. They talk about the new car but you mostly just stare lovingly at Charles’ dimples on the big screen.

After the speeches, they unveil the sleek new car. Your heart swells with pride for Charles. But you can’t wait for all the events and obligations to be over. You miss him.

The hosts invite Charles to say a few words. He steps up to the microphone, smiling. “Thank you all for being here today. I’m so excited to get behind the wheel of this beautiful SF-26 ...”

He continues talking passionately about the team and the season ahead. But then his eyes flick to the camera broadcasting the feed. “Oh, I also have a very special announcement.”

You sit up, intrigued. Charles winks at the camera. “As some of you may know, today is my wonderful girlfriend Y/N’s birthday.”

Your eyes widen. You have no idea what he’s doing but it makes your heart flutter.

“So to celebrate this amazing woman, I thought we could all join together to wish her a very happy birthday.”

Charles starts singing “Happy Birthday,” looking straight at the camera with so much love. The crowd joins in, the whole auditorium singing to you. You stare in overwhelmed wonder as Charles blows you a kiss.

When the song ends, the audience claps wildly. Charles grins. “I hope you enjoyed your serenade, mon cœur. I can’t wait to celebrate you properly tonight. Happy birthday, I love you!”

The livestream switches off and you sit staring at your phone in shock. Trust Charles to orchestrate something so thoughtful and adorable. Only he could turn a huge unrelated event into a birthday present.

A few hours later, the front door finally bursts open. Charles rushes in and sweeps you into his arms.

“Surprise!” He laughs, spinning you in a circle.

You hug him tightly. “Charles, that was the sweetest thing ever!”

He beams. “I wanted you to feel special today even though I couldn’t be with you. Did you like it?”

“Like it? I loved it!” You punctuate each word with a smacking kiss.

Charles looks immensely pleased. “Good, because the celebrations are just beginning. Now, I believe I was promised cake?”

You spend the evening feeding each other cake and laughing over champagne. Charles serenades you again, because one impromptu singalong just wasn’t enough for him.

As you sway together, slow dancing in the kitchen, you whisper, “Best birthday ever.”

Charles smiles and pulls you closer. “We’ll make every birthday together your best one yet. I love you, Y/N. So much.”

Your heart swells with joy. No matter where life takes you both, with Charles every birthday is celebrated to the fullest.

***

A salty ocean breeze ruffles your hair as you gaze out over the glittering turquoise water. The sun is sinking low, painting the sky in dazzling pinks and oranges.

You sigh contentedly, snuggling back against Charles’ chest. His arms tighten around you as you sway together on the yacht’s deck.

“Happy birthday, mon ange,” he murmurs, dropping a kiss to your shoulder.

You tilt your head back to smile up at him. “I know I say this every year, but this is the best birthday ever.”

Charles grins, his nose crinkling adorably. “Well you deserve the perfect birthday getaway.”

You hum in agreement, perfectly relaxed and blissful here in his arms. Charles always plans the most romantic adventures for your birthdays. But after three amazing years together, just being with your favorite person is celebration enough.

As the sun continues to set you chat and trade soft kisses. The conversation lulls eventually into comfortable silence.

Charles shifts behind you. “Y/N, can you turn around? There’s something I want to ask you.”

You swivel in his arms to face him, curious at his suddenly serious tone. But a radiant smile lights up his face.

Slowly, Charles sinks down to one knee before you. Your breath catches as he takes your hands in his.

“Mon amour, these past three years with you have been the happiest of my life. You are my best friend, my heart, my home. I want to laugh with you, explore the world with you, and grow old with you.” His eyes shine with emotion as he gazes up at you.

“So Y/N, will you make me the luckiest man alive by marrying me?”

Joyful tears fill your eyes. “Yes! Of course I’ll marry you!”

Charles’ face splits into the most delighted grin. He moves to stand but wobbles slightly, the boat swaying beneath the two of you.

You reach out to steady him. “Careful!”

“Sorry, just excited,” he laughs breathlessly. With exaggerated care he pulls a ring box from his pocket and opens it to reveal a dazzling diamond ring.

Your smile widens impossibly further. The sunset lights the gems ablaze from within.

Charles takes your left hand gingerly, his own hands trembling. “I hope you lik-”

But his unsteady fingers fumble and the ring slips from his grasp. You both gasp, hands shooting out too late to catch it. The diamonds glint once in the dying sunlight before plopping into the blue water.

“No!” Charles cries in horror. In a flash he’s scrambling to rip off his shoes and shirt. Before you can react, he’s diving in after the lost ring.

“Charles!” You rush to the railing, scanning the rippling surface for him. Bubbles appear where he dove down. The seconds stretch nerve-wrackingly until finally he surfaces, gasping for breath. In his clutched fist, the ring gleams triumphantly.

Relief crashes over you as Charles swims to the ladder. He clambers back aboard the boat, soaked and panting but grinning ear to ear.

“I got it!” He crows, holding up the retrieved ring.

A delighted laugh bursts from you. Only Charles would dive headfirst off a yacht to save an engagement ring. You throw your arms around his dripping shoulders, not caring that you’re getting drenched too.

“My hero,” you kiss him soundly.

Charles wraps you in a soggy hug. “Couldn’t let this ring get away when I still have a very important question to ask you … again.”

He sinks down once more to his knee, water pooling around him. With his hair plastered to his forehead and clothes soaked through, he looks adorably bedraggled but still so breathtakingly handsome.

Grasping your hand again, he asks earnestly, “Y/N, will you marry me and make me the happiest man in the world?”

“Yes!” You don’t think you’ve ever smiled so wide. “Yes, Charles, yes!”

Charles whoops triumphantly, surging up to kiss you passionately. This time his hands are steady as he finally successfully slips the ring onto your finger.

Admiring the shimmering diamonds you joke, “This ring might need a free cleaning after that swim.”

Charles laughs, pulling you close again. “I’ll get you a new one if you want. Anything for my future wife.”

Wife.

The word sends a thrill through you. You cup Charles’ face in your hands. “This is the only ring I’ll ever want. Because it’s from you.”

His eyes soften. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too.” You lean in for another searing kiss as the last light fades behind the horizon.

When you finally draw back Charles wrinkles his nose. “As romantic as this is, I should probably get into some dry clothes.”

You laugh, plucking at his soaked shirt. “Good call. Then we can continue this celebration in proper style!”

Charles grins and sweeps you up into his arms. “I like the way you think, Future Madame Leclerc.”

***

“One more push, you’re almost there!”

You squeeze Charles’ hand with all your might, face scrunched in exertion, as you bear down to bring your baby into the world.

This is not exactly how you envisioned spending your birthday this year. But as you give one final push and hear your daughter’s first cries, you know this is already the best birthday of your life.

“She’s here! You did amazing, mon amour!” Charles says through joyful tears, kissing your sweat-damp forehead.

The doctor holds up the squalling, wriggling newborn. “Congratulations, it’s a girl!”

Charles cuts the umbilical cord with shaky hands before the nurses whisk your daughter away to be cleaned and checked. He turns back to you, eyes shining. “I’m so proud of you, Y/N. She’s perfect.”

You beam tiredly back at him. The child you created together, your little family, is finally here. After long months of waiting, your birthday wish has come true.

Soon the nurse returns, swaddling your baby girl in a soft pink blanket. “Say hello to your daughter,” she says gently, placing the tiny bundle in your arms.

You gaze down at your daughter, tears of joy and wonder sliding down your cheeks. Ten tiny fingers and ten tiny toes — she’s absolute perfection.

“Hello Juliette,” you whisper. “Happy birthday, my beautiful girl.”

Charles perches gingerly on the edge of the bed, staring at you both like you hung the moon and stars. He reaches out a tentative finger to stroke Juliette’s downy head.

“She’s so small,” he marvels. “And so perfect. I can’t believe we made this little human.”

His voice cracks on the last word. Your tough Formula 1 driver melts into a puddle of emotion in the presence of his daughter.

You glance up at Charles, your husband, your soulmate, and now the father of your child. The utter love and joy shining from his eyes in this moment eclipses every birthday and every milestone you’ve shared before.

“I used to think so many birthdays were the best day of my life,” you say softly. “But now … this is it. The real best day.”

Charles smiles through his tears and leans in to kiss you tenderly. “This is just the start of so many best days together.”

You both gaze back down at the baby nestled between you. Juliette blinks up at you tiredly and the sight of her green eyes looking back at you takes your breath away.

Charles lets out an awed little laugh. “She has my eyes.”

He holds out a hand and Juliette instinctively grasps his finger. Charles completely melts.

“Hello, ma petite princesse,” he coos. “I’m your papa. And I’m going to love you forever.”

Juliette seems to study his face intently before giving a big yawn that makes you both chuckle. Your heart feels fit to burst watching Charles bond instantly with your daughter.

The next hours pass in a blissful blur of feeding, diaper changes, and stealing each moment possible to just gaze at the miracle you’ve created. You almost forget it’s even your birthday until Charles speaks up.

“You know, I had something else planned to celebrate today but Juliette decided she simply couldn’t wait,” he laughs.

You just smile. “This is the greatest gift I could have asked for.”

He leans down to brush a feather-light kiss to Juliette’s forehead, then yours.

“I guess we’ll just have to plan an extra special party when you’re both home,” he says with a smile. “Our little princess deserves the biggest birthday bash for entering the world on such a special day.”

You grin up at him. “I have a feeling her daddy will go all out.”

“Only the best for my girls.” Charles winks.

Juliette stirs in your arms, letting out the tiniest of baby sighs that melts you both instantly.

As Juliette drifts to sleep cradled between you, her little fingers curled around yours, you know this birthday marks the start of your greatest adventure yet and many more amazing birthdays still to come.

[thatsdemko]

just an incident - m.verstappen

masterlist

requested: n

pairings: max verstappen x leclerc!fem!reader

warnings: hints of some friends to lovers trope + google translated French and Dutch + wrote this BEFORE the Monaco 2023 gp!

a/n: I cannot remember who it was that said most Dutch don’t use nicknames like “angel” or “baby” but I didn’t feel like changing the pet names so my apologies 😬 had a lil dream about this so enjoy xx

it really wasn’t supposed to happen. at least you didn’t want it to happen, but he most certainly did.

growing up he was your brothers biggest competitor and challenge. race tracks weren’t the same when max verstappen was on the circuit, and that was still true to this day. max became a menace and impossible to beat in that Red Bull, it made loving him in secret and supporting your brother in public harder.

because every race meant listening to that Dutch national anthem while your brother told off his team for the shit race. it meant spending long nights in the Ferrari garage rather than the ones in his hotel room celebrating his victory. loving max verstappen was not easy.

“mijn engel wat zit je dwars?” he asks, fingers gently brushing down the skin of your back. you’re sitting upright in his bed, pillow covering your chest as you scroll through the chain of text messages from your brothers. you could never have a peaceful evening alone without one of them calling or texting. my angel what's bothering you?

“mes frères.” you grumble tossing your phone into the pile of clothes on the ground before relaxing against his chest, “but I’m all yours now.” you press a kiss to his jawline, watching those beautiful green eyes close in contentment.

“why don’t you tell them about us? are you that worried?” his arm wraps around your shoulders allowing you to sink further against him. he knows Charles would have heart failure hearing his baby sister was more than just a friend with max, and it would give him all more of a reason to push him off the track or do risky overtakes. racing wouldn’t be the same for Charles or max, and maybe he hadn’t thought of that, but you certainly did.

“I’m more worried that I’d be stealing his boyfriend from him.” you joke watching the lines around his eyes crinkle, smile forming on his lips. you loved that smile dearly.

“we broke up a long time ago.”

—

“you go missing? been trying to call you for hours.” Lorenzo doesn’t even need to look up from his computer to know it’s you entering the house. just by the sound of your silent footsteps and nails tapping against your phone, he knew it couldn’t be anybody else.

especially since he began to pick up you were beginning to be late or no shows recently. you would push off family dinner for said alone time or show up to family game night a half an hour late. he wasn’t one to budge into your life and ask the questions, but seeing as things were drastically shifting he felt he needed in.

“what? no, just needed some extra sleep.” your lies weren’t getting any better, he knew the high pitch tone and small stutters were nothing but false words.

“you think to run a brush through your hair?” he scoffs seeing the snarls and tiny mats that you didn’t notice. you’re lucky your mother wasn’t home or else she’d have fainted at the sight.

“why are you in my business?” you ask making him finally look up from his laptop to see the purple faint bruises against your collarbone. there was no sleeping in for you, and he couldn’t help not fighting the smirk against his lips as he pulls the cup of coffee up to try and mask it.

“just go take a shower before Charles and Arthur come home, please?”

you listen to his request and find the warm water against your aching body and sensitive skin comforting. his nail marks at your hips were fresh, the pull in your groins were painful in the steam, and the purple bruises at your collarbone weren’t going to be easy to cover up. it was evident max wanted your family to know about him, whether you would actually drop his name was up to you.

the thick sweatshirt of Arthur’s that you stole covers what you wanted, and the baggy sweatpants you borrowed from max masked your shaking quads with each step. maybe you did miss being home, but you were missing that Dutch accent and being under the gaze is his big green eyes.

“when did you get back?” Arthur asks, head peaking into your room where he sees you tapping away on your phone, a little smile evident against your lips.

“this morning. how was work with Charles?” you turn around to see him moving in your room. Arthur was like your best friend, growing up one year apart, he was the closest thing you had sometimes, and lying to him about your relationship wasn’t easy.

“good, we ran into max.” even his name made your heart skip beats, you shifted uncomfortably against your bed trying to not make it obvious you were eager to hear how he was— despite having seen him only hours ago— or if he mentioned you.

“and?” you ask swallowing nervously, Arthur shifts against the doorframe with a shrug, “he’s alright, just prepping for Monaco.”

you let out a tiny sigh of relief nodding, “good for him I guess, I kind of hope he loses.” you lie biting your tongue and hear a laugh from Charles across the hall, “me too!” he calls out.

—

“you hope I lose? I heard that rumor by the way.” his voice startled you making you turn around to face him. he’s in his suit and tie, dressed his finest just like yourself. the expensive gala you were in was packed to the brim and you had lost all of your family members minutes ago when you spotted the Red Bull drivers appearance.

“you know I want you to win.” you move a little closer to him, his hand discreetly rests against your hip and he presses a friendly kiss to your cheek that you wish could be a little more than that in public.

“hoe gaat het met mijn meisje?” he leans into your ear, the soft whisper leaves a tingling sensation down your spine making your body curl closer to him. how’s my girl?

“il manque juste ta touche.” you reply, hand resting against his chest, nervously adjusting his crooked tie. you know people are staring and cameras are recording, but under his gaze you feel protected. those big hands and aggressive demeanor would go to war for you against anyone here. just missing your touch

he chuckles under his breath, “you have all of me, my love.” his lips press your temple quickly, before excusing himself to shake hands with Sergio Perez, his teammate.

you move out of the way when the cameras begin to flash and interviewers move in to ask questions to the Red Bull drivers. you find yourself watching from the sidelines beside Daniel, but his eyes always find you. a wink in your direction let’s you know he hasn’t lost sight.

“flirty with my man?” Daniel nudges your elbow gently, making you break your stare at the lady who’s getting to close to max for a picture.

“flirty? no, he was winking at you.” you laugh watching max pull Charles in for a photo with the two drivers. three of them smiling proudly for the cameras before Charles pulls away, a little dizzy from all the flashing.

“hm, I don’t recall him making sexy eyes at me in our contract.” daniel pushes you in the direction of max. now that the photos were done, you could tell he was looking for you, but of course Charles whisks him away before you both can close the gaps between each other.

“you think you’ll win in my circuit?” charles jokingly asks. pulling max out from the mass crowds of people, you were trailing behind the two of them pushing through bodies to join them.

max scoffs, “I can’t predict the outcome of this race, mate. we’ll just have to wait and see.” the Dutchman sees you push through a few people and he extends his hand to help you before you stumble into Carlos.

“yeah, well with my luck I’ll be last.”

“no Oscar and lando will make sure you aren’t.” max chuckles, the two make faces at each other before the tipsy giggles escape their lips. you wish all nights were like this, the two of them happy and not pinning each others successes for their failures.

“what will you do if you win?” you ask Charles stepping a little closer to their conversation watching him think. you look up at max who’s thinking through if he should put his hand against your back, maybe pull you closer to him.

“I don’t know yet. maybe take maman out to dinner? this is all hypothetical.”

max nods, hand finally resting against your lower back, “well if I win I think I’ll take a special someone out for dinner.” he pulls you closer to his chest, your arms unconsciously wrapping around his torso.

“oh? who is that?” charles asks, and it has yet to hit him. he’s clueless to Max’s hand resting on your ass, your arms around his torso, and his lips pressing into your hair. charles was clearly oblivious.

“me, idiot.” you scoff finally getting his attention, his eyes scan each part of your bodies and how close you were together. he looks lost, like a puppy trying to find home as the dogs finally connect with what’s in front of him.

“no! when did this happen?!”

“it was just an incident.” max shrugs, there was no other way to describe it. the pieces just fell into place and max verstappen somehow became the man you loved more than just in the dark, he was someone you were beginning to love in public.

“don’t use my words against me.”

[fangirl-dot-com]

Fernando Alonso - I Love My Grandpa

Wow it feels like this series is flying! After this chapter, we only have two more to go. Like – that’s crazy to me, never would have thought that one simple story idea would lead to something like a multichapter work with spin offs and extras! This one might be a little bit shorter so I apologize! I’m honestly just trying to get back onto the next chapters! 

All of you readers have helped me get to where we are with this entire work and I promise to be a good author! 

[TAG LIST IS CLOSED]

Like always, comments, questions, concerns, reblogs, and likes are appreciated! Much love <3 

You sighed as you walked around the paddock. Bored out of your ever-loving mind. Max was off in some meeting, Charles was hidden in the Ferrari garage (one you hadn’t found out how to infiltrate, the Italians are menaces to societies), Lando and Oscar are late, Alex decided to go off with Lily and NOT invite you, and Logan was sleeping. Which, in hindsight, was probably what you needed to be doing, but you were restless. 

You’d been out of the car for one of the small breaks and were just itching to get back into driver. But no. 

You were stuck in the paddock. 

Alone. 

You thought about bothering Mitch, but like most adults, she was working for the race this coming weekend. Boo-hoo. You knew that Christian could give you something to do, but that would mean an old lady job like filing. Or honestly, it wouldn’t but you didn’t want to give Christian any ideas. 

Now, you were stuck, scrolling through one of your multiple social media apps, on the hospitality roof. Your headphones were on, blocking out the world. You swiped out of Instagram and clicked on TikTok. 

Maybe you should have bothered the social media personnel. They seemed to always look for drivers to make new videos. You quickly stood up. If they wouldn’t find you, you would do it yourself. Glancing over the railing, your eyes danced along the grid. Who could you approach and force to make a TikTok with? 

Your eyes widened at the sight of the emerald green that flashed below. A smirk grew on your face as you quickly left the roof to go down to the pitlane. Once out in the sun, you made your way over the garage. 

You knew better than Max to wear the Red Bull clothing on days that it was not needed. So you blended in, kind of. You glanced around for the one driver that you knew would make a video with you. He wasn’t named “public figure of the year” for nothing. Even though it was only for Spain, it still counted. 

You walked up to a group of mechanics, suddenly feeling confident. 

“Do you know where I could find Fernando?” your voice echoed through the empty garage. They suddenly stopped what they were doing and looked at you. You felt small under their gaze, but held eye contact. 

One of them sweetly smiled and said that Fernando should be watering plants around the pit. You quickly thanked him and left the garage, a tight grip on your phone. You would get this video and be TikTok famous. 

Your only goal in life. 

You snorted at your thought. That was definitely not your goal in life, but it was one of them. Looking for the Spaniard was harder than you thought. You thought you had gone to every single garage on the planet, and he was nowhere to be found. 

At one point, you ran into several of the other drivers. And when you say ran into, it was quite literally. It wasn’t your fault that Max decided to step in front of you when you were speed walking past Red Bull. 

The impact was more than you thought, as you found yourself on the hot asphalt. You gazed up at the Dutchman, sun getting into your eyes. You pulled yourself up and stood next to him. Max still looked as though he was recovering from your hit. 

Before he could say anything though, you blurted out, “Have you seen Fernando?” 

Max had a bewildered look on his face. Why would you be looking for Fernando? From behind you, Charles suddenly appeared, eating what you think were some sort of chips. 

Right, Max never went anywhere without Charles and Charles never went anywhere without Max. Maybe for secret Santa, you’d get them one of those giant shirts for them to wear. 

Through his bites, Charles managed to get out, “I saw him earlier at hospitality.” 

You clapped him on the shoulders. “Good man. Thank you.” You quickly reached into his bag of snack, grabbed whatever your fingers could feel, and dashed away, stuffing your face. 

The Monégasque and Dutchman just stared as you bolted from the both of them. 

“What was that?” Max asked, as Charles looked down at his bag with whine.  

“She took the last of my snack.” 

Max shook his head. “Come on. We’ll get you more snacks. Red Bull doesn’t go over cost cap on catering for nothing!” 

The two drivers disappeared, leaving the various employees questioning what they just witnessed. 

As for you, you were still on your journey. You climbed the stairs once again, putting yourself right back where you started. And low and behold. 

There he was. In all his glory. 

Watering the plants?  

He must have sensed your presences, or heard you gasping for air since you took the stairs. But you wouldn’t talk about that. 

He sent you a welcoming smile and beckoned you over. You gingerly stepped closer to the plant that he was showering. You cocked your head, not knowing what else you were supposed to do. Your eyes were wide as you looked at the nice flowers that had bloomed. You decided to talk first. 

“Do you water all of the plants?” 

A deep chuckle escaped Fernando’s lips. He had watched you look with a puzzled face. 

“Not all of them. Just the ones that look like they need something extra,” he gave you a wink before turning back to his task. You took this moment to look around. At the opposite edge of the roof, there was a smaller plant that looked as if it had seen better days. 

You grabbed one of the water bottles that Fernando had near him and opened it as you cracked the seal. You carefully poured the water over the small plant. Watching, you noticed how the dirt seemed to just drink it up. 

This was actually pretty nice: having to share a quiet space with someone. You made your way over to a few more plants before walking back over. It seemed as though Fernando was done as well. 

You went to speak, but was interrupted with a growl from your stomach. Quickly looking at your phone, the time shocked you as it was already past lunch. Fernando quietly laughed. 

“Lunch?” 

You grinned widely at the suggestion. The two of you made your way down to the hospitality cafeteria. It was pretty empty, since the lunch hour had passed for multiple people. You walked up to the line, ordered, grabbed your food, and found a nice table near the back by a window. It reminded you of the first lunch you had with Mitch. 

Fernando sat across from you. You liked his energy. 

“So,” he spoke first, “I heard from one of my mechanics that you were looking for me?” He raised his eyebrow. 

Your cheeks flushed as you bit into your sandwich. You quickly swallowed to answer. “Uh, I was bored and I wanted to make a TikTok. But everyone was busy, so I thought I’d try to find you.” Your shoulders raised in a shrug. 

You found yourself doing that quite a bit. 

The Spaniard looked at you. “You couldn’t find someone younger? I’m just wondering why you’d come to me first?” 

“Well, uh, there were some mechanics not working, but I really judge people of how I feel around them. They kind of gave off a busy vibe that I didn’t like. But you have more of a calm, grandpa kind of vibe.” You sipped your water. “I mean, if you thought that your career in Formula 1 being longer than Oscar has been alive, it’s worse with me. You’re 24 years older than me.” 

Fernando looked like his body took a screen shot. 

You quickly put out your arms, trying to console the driver. “I didn’t mean it in a bad way. It’s nice to have someone who’s older. I really looked up to you as a kid, and I still do.” You twisted your fingers nervously and Fernando could see that. 

“It’s not an issue niña. I’m honored to have someone like you that looks up to me. But let’s maybe not talk about the ages.” You giggled quietly as his scrunched face.  

“It’s kind of hard not to think about it when everyone calls me kid,” your face also scrunched, same as Fernando. “I’m glad that Oscar and Logan don’t do that, but even Lando has started.” You pretended to cry. “He’s only 3 years older.” Your head hit the table.  

He kind of just watched you go through the five stages of grief. If there was one thing he knew about kids, it was to just let them go through the motions. Your head quickly shot up as you took inhaled.  “Can we make a TikTok now?”  

A small laugh left his lips. “Sure, we can. Did you have an idea?”  

Your hands reached for your phone, unlocking it quickly.  “Uh, I had a couple of ideas, but, I think one would be really funny. I’ve been seeing some comments about how you act like our grandpa sometimes, so this audio would be funny, even if it says dad.”  

You played the video, the voice filling the space around you. “I get it you’re all fatherless…I’m not, I love my dad.”  Fernando let out a chuckle as your eyes lit up at the funny sound.  

You continued, “I’d just put words over it so that it would say ‘grandfatherless’ instead.”  

“Sounds like a good plan.”  

The two of you left the cafeteria to film the segments of the video. Because of time change and wherever you were in the world, it got a bit dark while you were eating. You carefully filmed your part a couple of times before it was deemed acceptable. You guessed that Fernando had done a lot of these because he was basically a pro.

You captioned it “Honorary Gramps” and posted it with Fernando’s approval.  

Before you knew it, Max had come to get you.  

You went to leave, before turning around and jumping to give Fernando a hug. “Thanks Grandpa-Nando.”  

You stepped back to walk away with Max, who had a smirk on his face. He called back to the older man.  

“Does this mean we get to call you that?” Max bit back a laugh.

 Fernando shook his head. “Absolutely not.”  

You whacked Max on the shoulder, “Hey, that’s only reserved for Red Bull’s golden child.”  

Max had a weird look on his face. “I thought that was me?”  

You shook your head before walking past him. “You have so much to learn Maxy. Let’s go find Christian.”

Tag List : @awekbachira @lightdragonrayne @leilanixx @angsthology @topguncultleader @landosgirlxoxo @gods-menace @itsjustkhaos @thefandomswhre @alwaysboredsworld @vellicora @bintuabbas @sam-is-lost @empress-kimiko @assholeinatrenchcoat @kagatinkita @glitterquadricorn @zyonsay @tsukishimawhore @ashy-kit @agent-curt-mega @julesbabey @lydialawrence @stopeatread @claudia5912 @nichmeddar @blueberry64857959 @laura-naruto-fan1998 @leptitlu @alessioayla @badassturtle13 @kaaale @wcnorris @cool-ultra-nerd @hockeyboysarehot @agent-curt-mega @myxticmoon @cmleitora @sam-is-lost @misartymis @boiohboii @alexander-hamilhoe @jayda12 @indesicivelyconfuzzled @fangirl125reader @itscrzy @xcharlottemikaelsonx @fionaschicken @torchbearerkyle @ineedafictionalman @loaksmuntxa @classiclitfreak @sarcasm-ismy-onlydefense @luisie @jayda12 @comfortzonequeen @taylor-will-be-the-death-of-me @inejghafawifesblog

[adventuringblind]

Can I request Lando x Sainz! reader, Maybe she is younger than him and she was previously dating Charles but always being bff with Lando and how Carlos would react

I love you, please save me.

Lando Norris x Sainz!reader

Genre: angst and fluff

Summary: when readers relashonship with Charles leaves her broken, Lando and Carlos are there to help pick up the peices.

Warnings: talks of cheating and toxic behavior.

Request: Yes, and I hope you like it! My requests are open for Lando, Max, Oscar, Daniel, and Charles.

Notes: written in second person.

Masterlist // part two

Charles leclerc had been a dream on a boyfriend. He was everything you could have asked for. But Lando was there for you after the fall.

You spent lots of time around the paddock. Usually trailing after your older brother or attempting to find his girlfriend.

With all the time you spent there, it was only natural you got to know Lando. Your brother being a driver for McLaren meant getting to be a menace to your brother with Lando.

The two of you became fast friends. Oddly enough, because of the age gap between you and your brother, it meant that somehow he'd convinced Lando to also take on a more protective role.

You basically had personal body guards if you went anywhere.

When Carlos moved to Ferrari, you found yourself spending more time with a certain monegasque. Carlos and Lando both like Charles, so when he asked you out they were happy for you.

Carlos knew felt bad for the Brit as you had told them. The subtle hurt over not finding the courage to confess his feelings earlier, did not go unnoticed by the Spaniard.

You stayed good friends with Lando. Splitting your time evenly between the McLaren and Ferrari garages. Even staying with Lando on multiple occasions over breaks and spending time in his hotel room watching movies.

You’d started becoming distant as of late. Concerning both Carlos and Lando. The two determined to know the reason behind your eye bags and mildly defensive manner.

“Do you think it’s something with Charles?” Asked Lando to the Spaniard on day over lunch.

Carlos pauses for a minute to consider. “I don’t think so, Charles has seemed fine. I feel like we would know if something was going on with them.” He then tilts his head, pondering over every situation that could be happening. “Right?”

~

This, however, was the beginning of a downward spiral. The first nine months wth Charles was great. You two got along well and have a shared interest in music and art. There hadn't been a dull moment.

Now you felt stuck in an endless cycle. Charles had started being secretive. Going out late at night without you and not coming back until the morning.

He'd been blowing you off and avoiding your questions. Anger rising in his voice when you did so.

You blamed Ferraris back luck. He blamed the bad luck on you.

But then he'd come back to you. Tell you sweet words and make you feel loved.

You didn't know how to leave, and if you did, it might affect your brother. You didn't want to put that kind of strain on their relationship.

So you stayed. Even now. Almost two years into your relationship.

Everyone has sensed something wasn't right, but you could never find the words to make it known.

Your brother had become more gentle with his tone. Hoping you would let him in so he could help you.

Lando had become your rock. Taking advice from Carlos to be gentle with you. There might be more going on than what meets the eye.

And he'd confirmed it one day after a race.

Another bout of bad luck hit Ferrari, and the Monegasque driver was far from happy.

Carlos happened to be walking by Charles driver room when he heard the yelling. The male switching languages so fast it gave him whiplash.

Concerned, Carlos presses his ear to the door. Fire building in his bones when he hears your broken voice attempting to soothe him only to be berated back.

Carlos knew it wouldn't go well if he picked a fight. He needed to be smart about this.

If this was how charles had been treating you, no wonder you were so tired.

Last week, you'd fallen asleep at Lando's apartment. Lando had tried to get you to move away from him. Not wanting to push any boundaries.

Eventually, he'd just settled on giving you his bed and trying to get a hold of Charles to come get you.

When Charles picked up, he could hear the loud music in the background and Charles slurring his words.

He'd tried to explain the situation only to met with an angry grunt and the sound of the call ending.

Heaving in frustration, he'd settled on taking you home himself in the morning.

He woke up to your tears the next morning. Staring at your phone and begging him to help you.

You'd told him everything that morning. Going as far as to confess, you'd had feelings for the Brit. You just couldn't get away from Charles. Trying and failing multiple times.

Lando kissed you that morning and promised to help get you out.

Now Carlos was on the phone with him, but he couldn't hear anything past Charles had once again made you cry.

He was angry, to say the least. You were so kind and funny, and you were one of the best listeners he'd ever met. You didn't care that he's a picky eater and cheered him up after rough races.

Everyone knew to stay out of his way. He was a man on a mission. Determination fills his lungs with each breath.

He ignored the confused looks of the Ferrari staff. Pushing past as they tried to ask him questions.

After what felt like an eternity to him, he made it to Carlos. The two are now waiting for someone to open the door.

"Can't write just open it ourselves?" Lando questions. His foot tapping a hole through the ground out on anxiety and impatience.

Carlos shakes his head. "Already tried it."

They hear the lock click and watch the door swing open. Without hesitation, Carlos is on Charles trying to understand the yelling. Both boys are getting defensive.

Lando finds you balled in the corner. Your eyes are red and puffy. Hands over your ears to block out the noise. He's immediately down by your side. Cupping your cheeks in his hands.

You embraced him. Using his heartbeat to steady your own.

You two stayed like that. Lando as your shield.

"Stay away from my sister." Carlos seethed. Having pushed Charles so far back, he created an opening big enough for Lando to heave you up and guide you out of the room. Carlos marching close behind you two.

It felt like a breath air being out of the garage.

You immediately detach from Lando and hug your brother. Your thanks being muffled by his chest.

He stroked your hair. "I wish I could've helped earlier. Also, I think someone else is more deserving of your love."

He looks behind you at Lando, who is now awkwardly waving at you two.

You smile through the tears. "Thank you for saving me."

Lando throws his arms around you and gently places his lips on yours. "It's my honor. Even better is that I get you all to myself now."

[formulaa-1]

Charles Leclerc and female actress reader instagram AU where paparazzi catches picture of you and Charles getting fast food after the Oscars

instagram au 🎭 C.L

actress!reader x Charles leclerc

paparazzi catch you and Charles getting fast food after the Oscar’s <3

Iv had a bunch of requests for actress!reader x Charles so here we go! <33

dailymail

dailymail: actress y/n y/l/n and her formula 1 star boyfriend Charles leclerc ,spotted outside a fast food restaurant after the Oscar’s! are they the it couple?

Liked by pierregasly, f1fan16 and 892,728 others

view all 12,282 comments

f1fan16: stop their both so humble and like normal?? And yes….they are THE it couple.

y/n_fanboy101: so jealous of Charles🥲

user373: anyone know how Charles managed to pull her ?? man has zero rizz

y/nusername: his maman payed me🫣

charles_leclerc: aye!

user373: NO WAY I LOVE YOU GUYS

Liked by charles_leclerc and y/nusername

charle_lechairluvr: THE WAY HES HUGGING HER😍 I REPEAT…THE WAY HES HUGGING HER😍man’s tryna give us all heart failure, and y/n😌

fan292: I’m so excited to see her back in the paddock🫶🏼

pierregasly: me and you both

fan292: PIERRE?!?!?!?!

user10: tf 😭😭😭😭pierre is a menace let’s be real

y/nusername’s story

charles_leclerc’s story

authors note- I know it’s short but I’m just trying to post for you guys,,Iv been super bad with posting for a while and I thought I was finally back to posting normally again but I think I just need to stop putting pressure to finish things quickly,,I hope your all okay❤️

[laura1633]

I thought maybe some people could do with a little Charles cuteness today so here is a very short drabble of pregnant Omega Charles

“You look cute” Max coos as he sees Charles all bundled up in the nest and decides to join him. 

“I feel a bit sick” Charles pouts and scoots over to Max so that he can snuggle up next to his alpha, “Can we just lie here for a bit?”

“Of course sweetie” Max kisses the tip of Charles’ nose and smiles at the tiny purr it elicits. Charles’ purring has intensified since he became pregnant. A comfort mechanism, the doctor called it. A way for Charles to ensure that he is creating a nice calming space for the pup to grow inside of him. It makes Max giddy to think that Charles’ body is adapting in so many beautiful ways to keep their pup safe and happy. 

“Do you think you could talk to her for a little bit?” Charles soothes  his hands over his rounded tummy, “I think it is nice for her to hear your voice”

“Okay” Max hums and tries to think of something to say. He’s not normally at a loss for words but he’s so relaxed and sleepy in the nest that he isn’t too sure what to talk about, “I could talk her through a lap. Sorry that is silly” Max cringes to himself as he hears Charles giggling next to him. 

“No, it’s not silly” Charles leans across and gives Max another quick peck on the lips, “I think it’s cute. Talk her through Monza” 

“Okay” Max beams and pulls Charles even closer to him, “Well we are carrying a lot of speed down the straight so we need to spot our braking point. We want to downshift quickly and hit the curb on the inside and…”

Charles closes his eyes and listens to the nice deep vibrations of Max’s voice. Even in the days before Charles realised he was pregnant he noticed the way Max’s voice had dropped a few octaves when talking to him and how the alpha’s scent had shifted to something warm and comforting. Charles realises now that his alpha was already getting into protective mode.

“…we want to get a good run out of this corner …”

Charles listens faintly to the words but mostly enjoys how relaxing Max’s tone is. He’s heard of an alpha voice before but always thought it was used to command and control. As it turns out alphas are fully capable of using their voice to soothe and relax.

“And then we really do want to hit the throttle..”

“Max” Charles keens as he feels a fluttering in his stomach. The Omega grabs his alpha’s hand and places it on to his tummy, “She is kicking. Can you feel it? She is kicking” Charles feels tingles of excitement all over his body. 

“Oh my god she was hitting the throttle with me” Max beams as he lays his palm flat against Charles’ stomach and feels the kicking sensation, “She is going to be a little menace on the track, aren’t you baby?” Max starts cooing down to Charles’ stomach, a huge smile all over his face as he then turns and starts to pepper kisses over the omega’s face, “This is amazing” 

“We are having a baby” Charles smiles, it feels so so real right now with Max pressed against him and their little girl letting them know she is there. Charles wiggles around as he gets used to the sensation of the movement inside of him.

“We are” Max grins back, a few tears wetting his eyes as he sees his beautiful omega so happy and hugging his tummy as he purrs encouragingly to their little pup. Their little pup who seemingly knows exactly when to kick out their feet and press down on the throttle during a lap of Monza. 

[sainzfilm]

omg i love that carlos drable, do you think you can do one in which they are friends or enemies but he gets jealous and they confess their feelings?

pairing: carlos sainz x reader

a/n: PLEASEEE oh my god i love this kind of trope 😭 thank you for requesting and i hope you like it anon! :) lmk what you think hehehe

⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅

“Happy birthday, Cha!” You grinned as you threw your arms around your childhood best friend, “I am ready to party tonight!”

Charles chuckled as he ruffled up your hair and yelled through the blaring music, “Thank you, petit chou. Have you seen your favorite person?”

“Blech, don’t remind me about him,” You groaned as you pretended to throw up, “All your other friends are nice! But him? Mon dieu, il est une menace!” My god, he’s a menace.

“You know, you did spill coffee all over him for like…three times,” Charles laughed as he guided you to a table with his friends inside the bar, “I can’t blame Carlos.”

Frowning, you punched his shoulder playfully as you sat down and smoothened your skirt, “Just because it’s your birthday doesn’t mean you’re exempted from my punches.”

“Peu importe ce que tu dis,” He grinned as he patted your head, “I’ll head over to Charlotte, just ring me up, okay? The bar’s just everyone I know so don’t worry.” Whatever you say.

“Go on, birthday boy,” You laughed as you tried to push him away, “I’ll see you later.”

Charles smiled at you as he headed off to the other side of the party, leaving you with the other drivers on the grid. Carlos was at the far end of the table, exchanging glances every now and then, but you never bothered to strike up a conversation and opted one with the blonde haired German driver instead.

“Just look at her,” Mick smiled as he showed you pictures of his dog, Angie, on his phone, “A tennis ball seriously can’t last for long with her!”

“Oh my god, my dog too!” You laughed as you took a sip of your drink, “I had to hoard on the tennis balls instead of running out to get one everyday.”

“You know what? We should definitely let them play together sometime,” He offered as he set his phone down, “I feel like Angie needs to have more pup friends.”

“That’d be great!” You eagerly nodded as you grabbed your phone and opened your contacts list before handing it to Mick, “Just put yourself in my contacts. I hope Stella and Angie would get along well.”

Mick smiled as he handed you back your phone, “You know what people say, dogs can reflect their owners and you’re nice.”

“Aw, thank you, Mick. I could say the same to you,” You smiled as you patted his shoulder before standing up, “I’ll catch you later?”

As Mick nodded in response, you smiled as you headed out to the back door of the bar to catch some fresh air on the balcony. But, what you didn’t know was that a certain someone followed you out.

“Guess you’ve got a thing for Mick now, huh?”

Frowning from knowing that voice, you turned around to see Carlos leaning against the wall, “What about it?”

“Nothing, nothing,” He chuckled as he shrugged, “Anyone knows what he was trying to do.”

“Oh please, Sainz,” You rolled your eyes as you crossed your arms, “All we talked about was our dogs!”

“Sure, princesa,” He smirked as he mirrored your stance and expression, “It’s obvious he was into you.”

“Are you being fucking serious right now?” You looked at him with annoyance written all over your face, “Why do you care anyways?”

“I don’t,” He grumbled as he kicked at the ground before walking to stand beside you, “I’m just saying. I don’t think he’s good enough for you.”

“And why is that?” You faced him as you poked at his chest and glaring, “Mick has been nicer to me in a span of an hour, compared to how you’ve been an asshole to me for nearly half a year!”

“Excuse me?”

“Yeah, that’s right,” You scoffed as you confidently looked up at him, “Asshole.”

“You’re seriously trying to pick a fight with me?”

“And what if I am?” You gritted through your teeth, “I’m so fucking tired of your immaturity when I’ve tried to be nice to you! If I didn’t have any respect for Charles, I would’ve never bothered to try and make amends with you!”

Carlos raised his eyebrow as he looked down at you, “Are you finished?”

“No, I’m just getting started!” You throw your hands up as you paced around the balcony, “I hate the way you treat me, how you fucking stare at me. I hate your dumb smile when you’re with other people except me. I hate your stupid laugh, especially when Charles tells you some pointless joke.”

Before Carlos could open his mouth, you raised your finger up at him as you continued, “Every single time a fucking guy tries to talk to me, you always make some stupid comment and it drives them away!”

Carlos took a deep breath and walked over to you, putting his hands on your shoulders, “Now are you finished?”

You sighed as you rubbed a hand down your face, “I’m just so done, Carlos.”

“Princesa…” He trailed off as he whispered, “I just- kiss me.”

“What did you just say?”

“Kiss me,” Carlos looked down at you, gently tucking your hair behind your ear.

Wrapping your arms around his neck, you took a deep breath and leaned in to kiss who you had thought to be your enemy.

Carlos smiled throughout the kiss, dropping his hands to your waist to hold you closer. This can’t be happening, he thought as he felt like this was just a dream.

You pulled away as it started to sink in. You kissed the guy you were supposed to hate.

“Fuck fuck fuck,” You exclaimed as you ran a hand through your hair, “What just happened?”

“We kissed,” Carlos shrugged as he had a small smile on his face, “It was pretty nice.”

“Was this your plan all along?” You looked at him, crossing your arms, “Rile me up by being an ass? Then you drive all the other guys away because you’re jealous?”

“Maybe,” He smirked as he shoved his hands inside his pocket, “You’re cute when you’re angry.”

“Oh just shut up and kiss me.”

“Whatever you say, princesa.”

bonus scene!

“You know you need to go,” You mumbled as Carlos kissed you while you were seated on his lap, “He is going to be looking for you.”

“I don’t care,” He replied back as he pulled away to brush your hair out of your face, “I just need time with my girl first.”

“Baby, we’ll have plenty of time later. You scheduled to work out with Cha.”

He grumbled as he pouted, “Stupid mistake.”

“Ay, don’t worry,” You smiled as you kissed his cheek, “I’ll be here when you get back.”

“Okay fine,” Carlos mumbled and kissed your forehead, “I’ll cook pasta for us after, cariño.”

As you held onto Carlos a little longer, the two of you didn’t hear a certain Monégasque driver come in Carlos’ apartment.

“Hey, mate, what’s taking yo- when the fuck did this happen?!”

[captainnameless]

any maxy + gp or lando + jon/will or charles + andrea crumbs??

Max + GP

It’s post Singapore ‘23, Max is alright. GP knows, but he is a little deflated. A drop is imminent and Daniel’s stuck on all sorts of data duties, still not back in the car.

The call if he could keep an eye on Max had been expected and accepted without a fuss. Max is already pouting when they step out of the elevator and make their way to Max’s hotelroom.

GP takes a quick look around before he’s intertwining his fingers with Max’s, pulling him along. “Let’s go, buddy.”

“When’s Daddy coming?” Max asks, following GP with a slight resistance in his step.

It’s an expected question, GP knows where he ranks on Max’s favorites list and while he’s proud to know he’s high up there, there’s no shame in admitting Daniel’s #1 stop is out of reach.

“He’ll get here as soon as he’s able, alright? It might be a while.”

It pulls a whine out of the younger and GP quickly swipes the room card to the door so they can have their privacy.

Luckily Max accepts his shower without a fuss, and GP feeds an overly tired Max little bites of his room service meal.

Max is determined to stay awake, eventually gives in to a cuddle when GP promises to wake him up when Daniel gets here.

Daniel gets there late, GP’s watching some B-list moved with dimmed audio while his hand places absentmindedly with little strands of Max’s hair while the younger’s face is pressed into his thigh, body stretched out onto the couch, thumb barely in his mouth still, Leo sat on GP’s other thigh where Max had put him.

Daniel coos, and it pulls a smile from GP who stills his hand.

“How’s he?” Daniel asks, kicking off his shoes.

“Ok.” GP nods, attention back on the boy. “He’s been a good boy, wanted to stay up for you. Eventually settled on being woken up once you got here.”

Daniel grimaces a little. “Let’s pray he goes back to sleep after.”

“He probably will, today was a lot. Think he just wanted a cuddle from you.”

“Well I’m not one to deny.” Daniel replies, moving over to the couch and gently crouching down, brushing his hand over Max’s exposed cheek. “Muffin,” Daniel breathes. “Daddy’s home.”

Lando + Jon

Jon’s bad at the discipline part, even though he’s seen Carlos steer Lando into a corner more than a handful of times, he’s too sensitive to the puppy dog eyes and crocodile tears, even with Lando being the menace that he is today.

Bribes, he’s good at bribes though.

“Lando,” Jon says, trying not to sound exasperated after trying to get Lando to do this one exercise for over 10 minutes now. “If we get the workout done before 3, I’ll take you to get a frozen yogurt instead of you having to eat your smoothie bowl.”

It gets Lando up and going easy enough, and with slightly threatening reminders of said frozen yogurt they get done what they need to do.

“Shower, then a treat.” Jon says, watching Lando scurry off into the gym showers and appear again in record time.

When he’s handing Lando back to Carlos at the end of the day the younger starts babbling about his froyo immediately.

Carlos smiles. “Were you such a good boy that you got a treat?”

“No,” Lando says, “Only a little bit.”

Jon bites his lip, at least Lando’s honest, but the look Carlos gives him shows he knows exactly what has happened and Jon squirms like he might be the one in trouble with Carlos now.

“You know I can’t help it.” Jon rushes to defend himself, taking a step back out of reach just in case with an apologetic smile.

Carlos sighs, ushers Lando towards Jon. “Did you say thank you?”

Jon gets a hug instead.

Charles + Andrea

Andrea has been around Charles for forever, it feels like, he knows the boy inside out. Knows about what helps him relax, be a better driver, even if he’s usually not too involved in that.

Usually.

“Hi.” Carlos says when Andrea opens the door to his hotel room, Charles in partially hidden behind Carlos, his cheeks vibrantly pink, eyes tired and a little wet.

“You know I don’t ask often,” Carlos continues. “But could you put him down for a nap? He’s exhausted, I have a meeting I can’t take him too. I couldn’t reach anyone else.”

Charles whines from behind Carlos, buries his face into Carlos’ side and only now does Andrea realize that Charles is clutching Carlos’ hand, the other one clutches a soft looking elephant attached to a small blanket.

“Of course,” Andrea says immediately, steps out of the doorframe to let them both in. He figures he knows what this meeting is about if Charles can’t come with, not anything Ferrari which is a sensitive subject still and explains the wetness in Charles’ eyes.

Carlos steps inside, takes Charles with him and then gently tries to move the younger out of hiding, facing him.

“Cuoricino,” Carlos says, brushing his thumb over Charles cheek. “Be a good boy for Andrea, ok? Have a nice nap? I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“No.” Charles pouts, scowl on his pretty face while he sucks in a breath.

Carlos sighs, gives Andrea a look before turning back to Charles. “Charlie,” he starts, “if you sleep time will go a lot quicker, no?”

Charles seems to contemplate that but doesn’t answer, pout growing as his eyes grow wetter.

Andrea moves over into their space, keeps his voice nice and calm. “We have a bit of a cuddle first, hm?” He says, and opens his arms a bit.

Charles is rarely one to deny a cuddle, and an emotional overly tired Charles does not deny one at all, stumbling into Andrea’s embrace with a shaky sigh. “Bravo, Tesoro.” Andrea hums, wrapping Charles up. “Can we say bye to Carlos?”

It’s best to move that part quickly, both Carlos and Andrea know so Carlos moves over to press to quick kisses to Charles’s head. Murmurs his i love you’s before quickly going out the door. “Grazie, Andrea.”

Andrea waves him off, gently maneuvers both him and Charles towards the couch ones the door closes and encourages Charles to get comfortable, watches him bring his thumb up to his mouth while the pout disappears, little blanket twisted around his fingers to brush at his face.

“Dormire.” Andrea says.

[leclerced]

ah that video you reblogged of Seb going to hug Charles has my whole heart 🥹 and now I’m thinking of the two of them with blindfold universe bunny?? like Charles has been seeing her for longer than seb so he knows more about what she likes specifically, but seb is more experienced in general so he’s also showing Charles the ropes (maybe literally 👀)

the two of them seem like such softies in public but I feel like they’d be menaces behind closed doors, definitely feeding off each other and very competitive. and bunny’s so smitten with both of them and she loves having their attention, she’d do anything they said

i don't think we've talked ab them at all, or if we have it hasn't been a lot and we need to. more.

they would be complete menaces behind closed doors. i think charles would love showing bunny off to seb. as soon as he finds out seb knows he'd call him up and invite him out to the next race so they could celebrate it with bunny. oscar and lando agree that as long as neither of them get a podium, then they can have her for the night.

even though seb has been with bunny before, he'd let charles show him whatever he wanted but the next time, he would take over and do the same. he'd probably have instantly picked up on some things charles did to bunny and repeat them just to show he could before he pulled out some tricks of his own. charles would ask how he does certain things and seb would laugh him off and say he can't reveal all his secrets.

bunny would never tell anyone, but seb and charles might be her favorite duo, other than oscar and lando obviously, because they balance each other so well. they'd compete with each other, but also i think they'd be soft and playful even when they're saying something filthy about bunny to each other. they'd talk about her like she's not there and they're not actively fucking her, like "oh did i tell you about the one time bunny and i-" and then they're laughing and reminiscing on old times while she's a moaning mess beneath them. they'd switch back and forth between talking about her like she isn't there, and then speaking directly to her, one of them praising her and the other demeaning her. the combination would make her head spin.

occasionally, their stories get a reaction out of her and they'd know she wants to do it again and they'd tease her about it before giving in and doing whatever she wants.

[thewatercolours]

PART EIGHT - Replaying King's Quest, Chapter Three (2016)

I love the sunset lighting during the card game scene. I tend to love rosy light in general. (Ha- we shall see more of it in this game soon enough!)

"Ohhh, mirror which one is it?" I like to think the Mirror is both guiding him AND giving him agency. Like yes, his true love is up in the tower, but as providence would have it, there's two princesses up there, forcing him not just to say, "It's meant to be!" but to actually get to know them, fall in love naturally, and yes, choose. Because, as old Graham emphasizes, real love takes work and intentionality and re-committing every day. So it's right that if the mirror wants to guide him in the right direction to love, it won't just just show him "here's the one." It will show him, "Here's what you need to do to begin pursuing this path - but you are not locked in, and the love will be the result of the two of you choosing it, not mirror horoscopes." And on a meta level, he is an adventure game character - in a very real sense his fate is somewhat set and limited - and yet there's choice within that context.

"Please tell me this is my inside voice?" Even if it is, you literally stood up from the table and flexed your biceps for absolutely no reason during the awkward silence.

I often use icebreakers in my classes to get everyone warmed up for discussion. I have occasionally adapted Moral Quarrel questions for this purpose - they've generally gone over well.

Want to know my real answers on Moral Quarrel? Here ya go.

"A magical genie offers you one of two very specific wishes. A, you can live one life that lasts 1000 years or B, you can live ten lives that last 100 years. Which do you choose?" I choose the latter. I think I'd rather live life on a more humanly-scaled time frame.

"A rich merchant inadvertently drops one shiny, gold coin on the ground. You see a poor, hungry orphan pick it up. Do you... A, convince the orphan to be honest and return the coin? Or B, turn your head the other way and let the orphan keep the coin?" Ok, my answer to this one is nuanced. If a starving orphan takes a single coin, I'm definitely not judging her or ratting her out. However, if I suspect the merchant to be someone of good will, I might suggest to the orphan to be honest and return the coin, because in my experience most people love to reward children's honesty over this kind of thing by letting them keep the money, or even giving them more. If it's the Merchant of Miracles... not so much.

"You have been hunting for your starving family all day and only managed to catch a small goose. On your way back home a hungry beggar offers you magic beans in return for the goose. The beggar tells you that the beanstalk that sprouts from his beans will lead you to a chest that produces unlimited food. He would go after it himself, but his legs are too tired and old. Do you... A, kindly reject the offer, and bring your starving family their dinner. Or B, let the beggar eat the goose, and plant the beans in your yard?" Am I living in the world of Daventry? Then B. Am I living in the real world? Then A. But either way, this does sound a bit like a "Gold at Oyster Cove" situation. The whole, "I'd go after it myself, but I can't," thing is immediately a bit suspect.

"You are a Royal Guard on the lookout for an evil sorcerer that has been terrorizing villagers. When you finally apprehend this sorcerer you discover he is Charles, your childhood best friend. Do you A, tell Charles to leave town, and never return? Or B, throw your friend in the castle dungeon?" Most likely B. Even if he is my friend, menacing commoners with magic shows a level of corruption that probably can't just be sorted out with a simple conversation and giving it some space. If he is my friend, I probably would try to get through to him with conversation, in hopes there was still some openness there. I would let him know that he had to face the consequences of his actions and invite him to come willingly with me, and if he showed any sign of regret for his actions I would assure him that I would help to get through this as best I could. But if he refused, I would have to take him by force. I'm a royal guard, and my place is the protect the people and uphold the law - and in the end, as hard as it is, I would be doing my friend a favour too. You can't hold someone's hand all the way to the destruction of their soul. If I cared about him as a friend, I couldn't let him get away with it. (But knowing me, I would be in agonies about this - I have such a hard time being upfront with my friends about uncomfortable things. People-pleasing. Thankfully, evil sorcery is cut and dry enough that I feel like it would be easier to take a stand.)

"You are the kingdom's wizard doctor. In the middle of the night, an honourable knight and a despicable thief arrive at your door. The thief's injuries are much more severe than the knight's. Do you... A, heal the knight first. Or B, heal the thief first." I pick B, for the exact reasons Vee mentions in game.

"A man you've never met, but is known as a friendly king, sends for your hand in marriage. Do you A, accept his invitation, trusting his reputation? Or B, seek love on your own?" Definitely not A, and I would want to clarify B to include all the different kind of love, not just happily ever after.

"Would you rather A, Have a pet dragon? Or B, Be a dragon?" I don't really want either, but if I had to pick, I'd much rather stay human and have a pet dragon.

"Would you rather: A, constantly reek of syrup and not smell it? Or B, constantly smell reeking syrup?" (Did the makers of this card game perchance know Number Two? This one seems even more specific than the friendly king question.) I pick B. I could get used to it, and I'd be less self conscious about it.

"Would you rather: A, have a tail that never stops loudly tapping against the ground, or B, have noodles for hands that wouldn't allow you to pick up anything?" Definitely A. The tail might be annoying and disturbing, but I am not trading my literal hands!

"An evil, old hermit, who wants a spouse and will stop at nothing to find one, has kidnapped you and taken you to an underground cavern. During the night you sneak to the entrance of the cavern. Do you... A,escape back to your home, hoping that the hermit will learn his lesson? Or B, cause a cave-in before leaving, dooming the hermit, but saving others from potential danger?" A, with nuance. I sneak out, and I don't kill him with a cave in, but as soon as I get free I alert the town guard and send them to arrest that evil kidnapper.

"You have a job you love, as the Royal Love Doctor, but during an appointment, your best friend's husband admits to you that he is in love with another woman. Do you A, break the confidentiality policy and tell your friend,potentially getting fired? Or B, advise the man to go back to his wife and hope your friend does not find out you knew he had eyes for another." I mean, this situation should never have happened as it's unprofessional and conflict of interest. But assuming it had happened, here's what I do - I strongly advise the man to go be honest with his wife himself, because that is the only way they can possibly turn this situation around. But if he will not, I will tell him that under the circumstances, I have to tell his wife, unless he is willing to tell her himself. I explain this situation to whoever is in a position to fire me, and live with the consequences. If he won't tell, I I do it. But like I say, this should never have happened, and I would feel horrible about it.

"You are poor and a thief pickpockets your only coin, forcing you to go hungry for the night. A few days later you see the same thief get robbed of his dinner by two bandits. You chase after the bandits and get back the stolen food. Do you A, return the food to the thief? Or B, keep the food, teaching the thief a lesson?" I'd return the food to the thief. It's his food, and turnabout is not fair play in this situation. But I'd also say, "Give me my money back, you dirty... merchant!!"

I think that's all of them?

[lestappenforever]

Quick and Weekly (or rather race week specific) kind of analysis, basically just my takes on what went on during the race.

WE NEED TO GET THE YOUNGER ROOKIES SEATS. Ollie was an absolute beast yesterday, finish p7, managing the tyres, MANAGING A 7 TIME WORLD CHAMPION BEHIND HIM, holding off the rest of the pack, close to overtaking george, just Nico with his experience was able to hold him off a bit longer. Scoring more points in F1 than F2. Scoring more points than almost half of the grid. All with just one free practice session. This kid has a future (the only driver I could actually call kid😂)

Ferrari look fast. Finally being able go see Charles’ pace yesterday, in addition to not being fucked over by strategy or any shit, they’ve done a pretty good iob on that car. I mean, a rookie scored on his debut, and so far, a Ferrari’s always been on the podium. Of course this is just the second race, but still.

Haas aren’t that shit this year. The car looks good. Kevin was an absolute MENACE yesterday. Holding off Yuki, Esteban, Zhou, Valtteri, Alex, Logan, Daniel ALL WHILE HE KNOWS HE HAS A 20 SECOND PENALTY. Also Nico’s pace was pretty good, holding off Zhou and Alex, and kind of with ease. Apparently having a TP other than Guenther is proving to something quite positive.

RB are in shambles. Like, Yuki was pretty good, but wasn’t able to convert his p9 quali to points, and Daniel is just not doing well, that even with that 20 second penalty to Kevin, he’s still dead last. (Maybe it wasn’t McLaren, it was the choice of leaving red bull back in 2019) (I have a whole thing in my head about Daniel, and I still want to make sure if the facts and data before sharing it). But it might have been a miss that RB didn’t get Liam in this season, but we never know. I mean, Helmut Marko did say that there could be mid season surprises. And so far, non of the RB drivers seem or look to be even in contention for that Red Bull seat, in all honesty, it appears so far that Checo is more likely to keep his seat for 25!

I am not 100% convinced with either McLaren or Mercedes. Like yes both are consistently scoring points, and gaining, but I can’t really find that speed. Like they are okay, better than last year, but not Ferrari level improvement. Also, the strategy that both teams put Lando and Lewis on (especially Lando) cost him a better position, more points, maybe even a podium let’s be real.

Williams are okay. Ngl, I love James Vowels, his technicalities and as he said in DTS his geek-inees (hoping to be like him honestly one day). I feel like, Saudi and Bahrain aren’t really their tracks, because they did well, both Logan and Alex gaining positions. They are a team I’m waiting and hoping to see thrive, because Alex and Logan both deserve it.

Stake were okay, especially with that Zhou crash in FP3, like he couldn’t even qualify, but strategy kind of wasn’t ideal, and in all honesty, they’re just kay, not too fast, but not too slow.

And finally, our leaders. Despite everything, they do be cooking (Adrian and Max, you’ve both done it). That speed, the tyre deg, just everything about that car is phenomenal. And Max deserves it, after everything he’s gone through in his life, and he deserves to re-write the history books, which he already is, with re-reaching seb’s record not even 6 months after breaking it. This man who everyone is bored of his dominance are all going to be crying and missing him after he retires (I DON’T WANT TO THINK OF THIS DAY, BECAUSE I’LL BE THE FIRST ONE IN TEARS) but Max Emilian Verstappen is something that hasn’t come and probably won’t come again in Formula 1 and Motorsport history.

So yeah, that’s kind if my inital takes in the race, kind if a mini summary as well, and may we always listen to the Dutch National Anthem because I’ve been emotional this week with Max and everything happening around him.

This is such a wonderful analysis that really doesn't need anything added to it because you've got this spot-on, so I will try to keep my own thoughts relatively brief.

Ollie did incredible and I am so excited to see him in F1 permanently. Him and Liam? The future is bright.

I am cautiously optimistic about Ferrari and I really hope that, for once, they won't fuck themselves over which is in no way, shape or form a guarantee.

K-Mag did so fucking well, and it brings me so much joy seeing my fellow Scandinavian putting on such a performance. And Nico had a decent race, which also makes me happy. It's obviously far too early to be sure, but their new team principal seems to have been a good choice.

VCARB are just... Well, I'm not even going to utter my thoughts. All I will say is that there is no way in hell Daniel will be a good replacement for Checo. Claiming Daniel is better than him is just laughable.

McLaren and Mercedes are giving Ferrari 2023 vibes with their strategy calls yesterday, and it will be interesting to see how they develop over the season.

I truly hope Williams will improve over the course of the season, because I want to see Alex and Logan do well so fucking badly.

As for Stake: they were unlucky, and I'm just glad Zhou made it out of that crash unscathed. It's a shame he missed out on being able to qualify because holy hell did that team do their fucking best trying to get his car ready. I want to see him, and Bottas, do well.

As for Red Bull, they are as impressive as I hoped they were going to be so far this season, and as a Max girl it makes me laugh seeing Max haters bitch about his dominance making the sport boring. I, for one, am having the time of my fucking life. I won't even think about him retiring at this point, and will just keep enjoying every race for as long as I can. And seeing Checo starting off the season in such a strong manner fills me with joy. I am by no means Checo's biggest fan, but the shit he went through last season at the hands of disgusting Helmut Marko and the F1 community at large has me wanting him to suceed. Put some respect to his name because God knows he's fucking earned it.

Thank you so much for sharing yet another wonderful analysis, my darling. You have no idea how happy it makes me, and how much I appreciate it. ❤️

[theultimatenonbinarynerd]

Mel's Top 3 Reading Recommendations

Introduction

As I enter my third year of reading I can now say that I have read enough books that I can start recommending some of my favourites to people. As of this blog I have read 77 books since 2022 and let me tell you its been a fun ride for sure. One promise I intend to keep though is to try read diversely and not just pick up Marvel, Star Wars and Doctor Who books. I mostly am starting to fulfil that. When I was younger all I read was Daisy Meadows Rainbow Magic Fairies Novels but as an older reader I'm going to do my best to make sure my reading is enjoyable and as diverse as possible.

I'll make another list once I'm six years back into reading but for now these books are books that have made a huge impact on me and are ones I would demand for you to check out if you haven't done so. These books are books that instantly sparked with me and that I found relatable. I can assure that the list isn't just scifi or Star Wars and Doctor Who novels. These are novels that struck a strong impression with me that are some of my favourites. I need to listen to more novels

There's been a lot of highlights but as much as I've loved them I've felt like those highlights haven't been as important to share. The books I've chosen are so important that I believe the 2nd and 1st entries need to be on the English Curriculum instead of outdated poop such as Of Mice And Men. Whilst the third entry is still an important read I feel like the top 2 are good educational tools whilst also being enjoyable books in general. The sad thing is though that I know they'd refuse the two books I've chosen due to their queer themes. So I'm sharing them with everyone is this post so that they can get the hype that they deserve.

Without further or do I'm proud to present

3: Light Of The Jedi By Charles Soule

Now I know what you're thinking but Mel this is a Star Wars book I don't even like Star Wars- Shhhhh. You may not like Star Wars but let me tell you with honesty that The High Republic is one of the best Star Wars eras due to how fresh it feels and who inclusive it is. If your a Star Wars fan and haven't read these your missing out. If your not a Star Wars fan I'd still recommend this one due to how orginal is and how it focuses on community and people coming together during a disaster.

For those who haven't read this wonderful introduction into The High Republic. Light Of The Jedi follows the pov of mutiple Jedi and government figures as they try stop a hyper space disaster from ravaging other planets. The villians The Deadly Nihil may or may not have pov chapters too. Normally stories with mutiple characters pov would be really hard to follow but not only does Soule manage to make it work he also manages to make it super entertaining.

It's such a unique way of story telling and a really good introduction to the Star Wars world even for those who may have never seen the films. If your a prequels fan and hated The Jedi this book will entirely shift your view on them and make you angry they fell so far into The Jedi of the prequels. There's also some really healthy Master Apprentice dynamics such as Bell and Loden as well as Burryaga and Nib. Its so refreshing and made me not only hooked on The High Republic but also desperate to pick up more Star Wars books.

Can recommend enough giving this book a chance as I promise it'll be worth it.

I had no idea that the next book would be so gut Punching. My second recommendation is...

2: When Our Worlds Collided By Danielle Jawando

I have never been more thankful that I picked up a book out of sheer impulse. This wasn't on my wishlist but I went with my friend and once I read the synopsis I impulsively bought it along with the book I went to the store for. At the time I didn't know if I'd made the right decision but now I know I did. This is one of those books that in my opinion needs to be in the UK education curriculum instead of harmful ableist books like Of Mice And Mine. It's so educational and raises awareness of what it's like to be a black teenager in the UK. It critiques society's harmful structure and also shows that tragedy as difficult as it has the ability to bring people together. I loved and if anybody is looking to diversify their tbr I'd recommend it in a heartbeat.

For those who haven't read the novel When Our Worlds Collided follows teens Chantelle, Marc and Jackson as their worlds collide after witnessing the murder of 14 year old Shaq. Their world view gets flipped and they have to question the institutional systems in police. All of the teens are in Yr 11. Chantelle a working class teen has to deal with a teacher who is deeply prejudice towards her, Marc has to deal with a new school and the struggles of being black in the foster and Jackson who comes from a rich background has to find his true friends and discover what he wants in life. All of them are relatable and have like I teased their own struggles to deal with throughout the book and Shaq's death fuels them and their new friendship.

It's a deep and heavy novel but super important novel to read. Of course I'd give a trigger warning for any bipoc readers but if your you must check it out. You want everything to be happy and go well but you eventually get a wakeup call and realise that's not releastic. It does have a lot of black truama but it's also hopefull and allows for these three teens to form a life long friendship. The sad bits are heavy but the lighthearted moments make you smile. My favourite lighthearted moment had to be Chantelle and Marc teasing Jackson over his love for Star Wars.

So I'm begging you please check it out, it's the book you didn't know you needed to pick.

Now my final pick is another book that early teen Mel absolutely needed. It healed my inner child. My number one recommendation is...

1: The Many Half-Lived Lives Of Sam Sylvester By Maya MacGregor

This book saved me. I'm so glad I picked it as one of the first queer books to read. I've had a lot of religious truama and struggled to accept myself being Nonbinary but this book was super affirming and it was so glad to have Sam's identity normalised. The best part though was the incredible Autism representation. Like Sam I'm Autistic and Nonbinary and I felt like the Autism representation was perfect. Nobody was ableist to Sam and they all accommodated them. Even the teachers were brilliant. I also loved how their special interest of studying people who died before 18 wasn't mocked or turned into a caricature. The murder mystery itself was also really gripping. No spoilers but it feels like the scene from Spider-Man Homecoming where Peter opens the door and discovers who The Vulture is. It's a book that slaps and is gonna be a super gripping read.

For those who haven't read the novel. The story follows Sam Sylvester a teen who isn't optimistic about their move to Astoria after experiencing truamatic hate crime in their previous town. Things get much more exciting when they not only meet new friends and a potential partner but also discover they are living in the same house where Billy a teen is the 1980s "accidentally" died. Sam and their new "friend" Shep aren't convinced it was an accident though so they decide to investigate. And let's say the answers don't disappoint at all.

It's an amazing novel with am entertaining mystery to solve, found family and healing from the past. It also really portrayed autism well and didn't turn Sam's special interest into a characteriacture you can tell an actually Autistic person wrote the novel. The queer representation is written just as well too. The author talk really informed how much love Maya put into the novel.

Like I said it healed my inner child and is overall just a wonderful book. You should absolutely check out, it has some of the best Autistic representation ever and has scenes that will leave you a gape when you realise Vulture was Liz Shaws Dad.

Out Of All My 5 Star Reads This Is Definitely The One I'd Pick Out The Most.

Conclusion

So that has been my Top 3 Reading Recommendations I hope at least one book has appealed to you and I absolutely promise to do another once my 5th year of getting back into reading is complete.

There's still so much I want to read and am excited to do so. Whilst I love Star Wars books I am trying really best to diversify my tbr as I don't want another situation where I only read Rainbow Magic Fairy books. Sam Sylvester and When Our Worlds Collided are clear examples of contemporary novels I've been able to enjoy.

Reading is great but remember that even if you want to do it for "fun" diversifying your tbr is important.

-Melody-

They/Them

[adventuringblind]

Daddy Issues Finale

Max Verstappen x reader

Genre: Angst and hurt/comfort

Request: no but they are open for Max, Charles, Lando, Oscar, and possibly Danny Ric if y’all have any ideas

Summary: Finally needing both fathers to leave you and Max alone, you start making steps towards going no contact to protect yourselves. Suddenly, the reader finds herself in an unlikely situation and once again finds herself dealing with their fathers.

Warnings: Read the title… it literally says daddy issues. Most forms of abuse are mentioned in this fic, so please proceed with caution. Sort of kidnapping. Reader is drugged. Also, this isn’t proofread because proofreading is hard, and I am lazy.

Notes: we’re back in third person! Also, the reader gets so fed up and becomes a slight menace. I totally was not expecting it to get this dark but here ya go!

Masterlist // Part one // Part two

Max was well aware he needed to do something about this situation. He just didn't know what yet.

It had been a few days since he found her on the floor. Eye's puffy and cheeks tear stained. He felt every bit of restraint he had snapped in him. He knew that logical thing to do was try to go no contact woth both fathers. But that didn't stop him from wanting to punch both for what they did to her.

He'd convinced her to get away for a while. So you headed out with Kika for some 'girl time' as she called it.

Max, on the other hand, was sat on the couch with Pierre, Lando, and Charles. Trying his best to give an explanation of what happened without getting to detailed.

They were nosey, though. So Max was bound to spill eventually.

"He hit her- twice."

The three other men stared at him in shock. Their mouths agape at what he'd just confessed.

"That explains her behavior when I picked her up from the airport." Lando sighed.

"What are you going to do about it, Mate?" Piqued Charles. His hand rubbing against his head to try and process what he'd just heard.

"I don't know yet if I'm being honest."

They all were aware of the bags under Max’s eyes. How his voice sounded so broken. He’d seemed so happy just last week. Thinking his father was finally going to let him breathe. Jos technically did, but he turned that frustration to you instead.

Yesterday Max was given her phone. She had set it in his lap and said everything he’d need to know was in your texts. One rule neither had ever broken was going through each others phones without permission. Both sides had parents that loved to invade privacy. So the two had come to the conclusion that they would communicate what they felt needed to be at that moment.

Y/N had struggled to talk about what happened the last few months. So she just gave Max her phone and let him read what had been texted to her. It was a little easier this way. He could get find what he’d needed to know and maybe get some questions answered and she didn’t have to struggle to get the words out.

“The things they’ve said to both of us are awful, but this a new extent of that.” His voice wavered. His friends doing their best to comfort him. They all knew it was bad. It was obvious after he started joking about it like it was normal. “We both have their numbers blocked. So hopefully that will keep them away for now.”

“Well your dad showed up at your door. Do you think he might do it again?” Pierre’s voice, albeit gentle, had an urgency about it.

Max groaned and flopped backwards further into the couch. The thought hitting him like a train. His dad could show up unannounced, again. “We’ll have to move.”

“There’s an open apartment in my building.” Lando quickly suggested. “We could have sleepovers!”

~

It didn’t take long for the two to get the apartment. Even less time for getting everything moved in. It wasn’t too far away from where they had been living, and everyone wanted to help get them out of there as quick as possible.

Everyone had agreed not give any ideas that they had moved. Privacy becoming important for the two lovers. Both stopped their online presence aside from Max’s professional one. He doesn’t even run that account, his PR manager does. He’d had a conversation with her talking about how he’d been having some safety issues.

The two were relieved when they made it to the next race with no parents in sight. Y/N however, was still on edge about sitting in the Redbull garage. Max was understanding about it and said he could see if Christian would let her sit by him to watch or maybe in the Alpine garage with Kika.

She went for the second option. Waiting until the very last second to give Max a kiss before the race. Then she made her way through the paddock to locate Kika.

She was so close to the safety of the Alpine garage. Close to being able to enjoy the race and watch Max do what he loves. Until a familiar face had her doubling back to the safety of Redbull. Or maybe nowhere was safe.

People were closing in on her. Her breath becoming increasingly restricted in her lungs. She needed to get back within eye shot of Christian. He knew some of what happened. Enough to know that if he saw Jos around the Redbull garage, to have him escorted away. He’d probably be busy though, and she didn’t want to distract anyone.

She did feel a little better after seeing Max in first on the screen. Her eyes leaving the path in front of her for a measly ten seconds. Only to find herself falling to the ground.

She gathered her bearings and made a move to get back on her feet. Until she felt a hand in her shoulder.

“It’s been awhile,” Came the voice of Jos Verstappen.

~

Max had an amazing race. He was excited to win, but he was also excited to find his lover. He didn’t see her during the podium celebration. Most likely due to the crowds. He’d try to locate her in the Alpine garage when he was don’t.

As he was walking around doing his media duties, he locked eyes with Pierre. Pierre who was holding hands with Kika. Kika who was supposed to be with you.

Max excused himself from the reporter and jogged up to his friend. “Kika, do you know where Y/N is?”

“No, sorry, I haven’t seen her all day. I thought she was with you since she hasn’t answered my texts.” She explained.

All three passed looks of confusion before they all became determined to find you.

Max was texting and calling you repeatedly. Praying that neither of your fathers had actually shown up. He finally ran into Christian who was trying to congratulate him on another win. Max, however, only hear the sound of you crying from his memories. Concern flooded through Christian as he watched Max delve further into the panic.

“Max? Are you alright? Can you tell me what’s going on?” He voice calm but urgent enough to get Max to come back to his senses. Now clinging to the sound. Using it to ground himself.

“She’s missing.” He breathed

“Who? Y/N.”

Max frantically began nodding his head. The desperation to find her clearly evident.

“I’ll ask around the garage if anyone has seen her. Why don’t you check your driver room and take a minute to breath.”

He didn’t want to take time to himself. He should be looking for his love. Christian made a point though, he wouldn’t be able to think rationally if he didn’t calm down.

Now he sits alone. Letting the tears escape. Still attempting to call her only to be greeted by the cheery voicemail recording.

When he’d calmed himself down and it didn’t feel like his head was spinning, he began his search one more. Retracing the possible path you might have taken to the Alpine garage.

It seemed everyone was searching high and low for her now.

There were only so many places you could be.

Max was startled by the sudden sound of his phone ringing in his pocket. Disregarding the caller ID, he simply answered “hello” without any hesitation.

“Is this Mr. Verstappen?” Asked an unfamiliar feminine voice.

“Yes, who am I speaking with?”

“This is a nurse from the general hospital.”

Everything after that was a blur. He hardly focused on the details. Only running back to his drivers room to find his rental car keys and his wallet.

He ran into Lando on the way. Making his best attempt at explaining while rushing around to grab his things. He hadn’t even bothered changing back into regular clothes yet.

“How about I drive and you change in the backseat.” Lando shot Max a wink and despite everything going on, Max managed a smile. At least he knows where she is now.

~

Everything happened in a whirlwind. One minute she was on her way to see Kika and the next she was gripped by the arm and told not to make a scene.

Her survival instincts kicked in. Knowing she should listen to the man who is determined to make her and Max’s lives miserable. He really needs a new hobby.

She wanted to scream as they passed by Redbull again, but something in her stopped her lungs from doing so. ‘Why is defending someone you love easier than defending yourself?’ She thinks to herself as the two exit the paddock entirely.

It doesn't take long until Jos is shoving her into the back seat. She complies, knowing he's unpredictable.

When she finally is in the car, she notices the figure on the drivers side starting the car.

Her father had come along too.

"Isn't this considered kidnapping?" She asks sarcastically. The car pulling put and starting the journey to an unknow destination.

Neither of them speak. It's unsettling and eerie.

She wanted Max. She needed Max. She knew if she wasn't back before race end that he would be frantic.

They'd tried so hard to be safe and private at the same time. Maybe they should have just made a public statement. Now, everyone was going to find out in the most dramatic way possible.

"Are you going to murder me?"

"No, now shut up, or I will." Spits Jos.

"I would if just told me where we're going." She shrugs. Knowing she's making them aggravated.

If Jos hadn't taken her phone, this would be a very different situation. She curses whoever made women's pockets so small.

"Fine, if you need to know so bad, im taking you home. Far away from Max. Back where you belong." Her Father shouts. Knuckles are turning white from gripping the steering while so hard. "You two are bad influences on each other. You tell each other lies about your families! I've done some research, and I think maybe you're hallucinating. I'm taking you home where you can get help." He explains.

This time, she didn't say anything. The tears weren't stopping. You knew your father had said things like this before about your mom. Going as far as to try and get her diagnosed with any kind of mental disorder that fit.

It never worked because she never had symptoms of anything he was suggesting. How was he expecting to make it work this time?

The answer came sooner than expected. A moment she slipped into the back of her head to escape left her open and vulnerable.

A needle was jammed into her leg by Jos. A cold feeling spreading through her body. She had no idea what it was. Only that it wasn't good and she needed to get out of this car.

The adrenaline from her flight instincts kicked in, and her breathing picked up. They were on a slower street. One lined with small shops and pedestrians. If she was going to jump, now was her chance.

Without thinking, she opens the door and launches herself towards the sidewalk. The people around either running away or running to help her.

She vaguely remembers someone asking what happened and if they should call somone.

"Max" was the only thing she could get out before tumbling into the darkness.

~

Max rushs inside the emergency room. Lando dropped him right outside the door before trying to hunt down a parking spot.

"How can I help you?" Asks the nurse. A little startled by his sudden appearance.

'I'm looking for someone."

It didn't take long before he was being led back to where they had been keeping her.

Relief flooding through his veins when he layed eyes on her. Trying and struggling to sip water through a straw.

Her eyes went wide when she saw him. Flinging the blanket off and swinging her legs over the side like she would just walk to him.

He rushed over to her and gently laid her back down. Her pupils are blown, and her body is swaying side to side. Confusion takes hold of Max. "What happened to her?" He asks the nurse.

"She has a minor fracture in her wrist and a gash on her knee from the impact of the sidewalk. We're still running tests to see the specific drugs in her system, but we do know for sure she was drugged." The nurse explains.

Max feels his stomach lurch. "I don't understand. What happened to her?"

"My apologies, I thought the authorities had spoken to you already. I'll send them in to explain."

Max's head is reeling. The love of his life was drugged, and who knows what else. It doesn't matter what any reporter says. He's getting extra security.

Tears slip from his eyes as he holds you. "I'm sorry, love."

"Why are you sorry, Maxy? You're here." She slurs. A smile graced her lips despite the situation.

The sound of heavy boots makes Max look up. The girl on the bed is now entertaining himself with his fingers.

"Are you family?" The officer asks.

"Yeah."

"We should step outside."

Max got up from his place beside her on the bed. She looked at him, tears welling in her eyes. Struggling to comprehend what was happening.

"I'll be right back." He soothed her. Placing a kiss on the top of her head.

Max followed the officer outside and closed the door behind him.

"We have reason to believe she was kidnapped. Witnesses told us she jumped out of a moving car and then almost immediately passed out."

Max's mind went in so many directions at once. How could this have happened? How did nobody notice?

The officer opened a manilla envelope and slid out two pictures. "These are the suspects who we caught trying to get her back in the cat. Do you recognize them?"

Max's hand flew to his face. He couldn't get words out. He was about to sink to his knees before Lando came around the corner. Seeing him about to buckle and reflexivley running up to him. Lando pratically catchs the Dutchman and helps him get steady on his feet again.

Lando tries to get his bearings. He was about to ask Max what happened when he notices the officer and, more importantly, the pictures.

"Isn't that your dad, Max?" Max just shakes his head yes. Releived Lando is there to say what he's trying to.

Lando leans in closer, the officer surprised at the action and almost pulling away. He stops, however, at Lando's next words. "And isn't that Y/N's father?"

~

It didn't take them long to have the young woman discharged from the hospital. Lando driving the two home and helping check the apartment for any potential threats.

The two males could tell she was feeling awful. The doctors flushed her system with water and put a cast on the fracture. The two were exhausted.

Lando said his goodbyes and told Max to call if they needed anything. including someone to stand guard.

Max had texted everyone on the ride home that she was back safe.

A new question on his mind: What happens now? Both your fathers had been taken into custody. Mainly on the charge of kidnapping. But the officer said they could testify and get them put away for longer.

Could the two of you manage that? The side of him that wanted to make his father happy said he should go bail him out. On the other hand, the two would finally he safe. No more anxieties about awful parental figures doing unwarranted things.

Both could start to finally get the healing they deserve.

~

It took some time, but both came to the conclusion to prosecute. The day of the trail came far to quickly for you to prepare.

There was supposed to be a race this weekend, but it had been postponed until later in the evening due to many of the racers wanting to testify.

When both were found guilty, the couple started crying. The thought of being free from the awful cloud looming over them finally set in.

Nether of them could believe is was this good.

When Max won the race later, it was the most emotional either had ever been. Max let himself be proud of his achievements.

Months later, the two had begun to heal. A slow process. Both are patient and understanding with each other. Trying to communicate as much as possible. Finding outside help to help guide them.

Security at the paddock had gotten better. She never felt vulnerable. Mainly because someone was always with her, and Christian let her sit next to him during races. He'd joked, saying that you already look like you belong there, so he might as well just give you a job.

And as the two lovers lie in bed together, they reminisce. How their daddy issues brought them together.

[reluctantjoe]

Mathew Baynton: ‘I sometimes think the culture wars only happen in people’s minds’

As he prepares to play Bottom at the RSC, the Ghosts star talks about why making comedy in the UK is no laughing matter

Before I meet Mathew Baynton I’m half expecting to encounter a version of the Regency poet he played with such expressive romanticism in the BBC’s exquisite hit sitcom Ghosts. Or the flamboyant rapping Charles II, just one of the many historical characters the collective reimagined with antic gusto in the children’s TV series Horrible Histories. Or even the fabulously reptilian Mr Fickelgruber from the recent blockbuster hit Wonka. In other words, surely an actor renowned for playing delicious Technicolour caricatures would be a bit outsized himself?

Instead when we meet at the RSC rehearsal studios in Clapham, Baynton slides along the wall as though trying to disappear into the paintwork. “I don’t like entertaining people socially,” he says apologetically. “At a recent wedding I was too shy to dance. I’d have no hesitation dancing my socks off in a show and looking very silly, but not at a wedding thank you very much.”

Baynton, 43, is about to play one of the silliest characters in the western canon, Bottom, the hapless, deluded wannabe actor in A Midsummer Night’s Dream at the RSC. It’s Baynton’s first theatre gig in 10 years. The reasons he hasn’t trod the boards for so long are perhaps predictable – the combination of screen and family commitments, he says: he has two children, 12 and eight, with his partner, the film historian Kelly Robinson. But also perhaps because no other stage role until now has made him think that “if I said no, I might spend the rest of my life wondering if I’d made a massive mistake”.

He’s been relieved to discover the Mechanicals, the amateur acting troupe of whom Bottom is arguably the least talented, are not the “beer-swilling rotund yokels with West Country accents” he remembers from mediocre productions in his youth. “My feeling with Bottom is that someone once said to him he was quite good at acting, and that’s been enough to make a monster out of him. He has precious little experience but just enough to make him think he can do it all. My Bottom will be ridiculous. But there is a real sweetness to his enthusiasm.”

Baynton is very good at finding the sweetness in the patently ridiculous. It’s there in Ghosts (which he co-created) about a mismatched bunch of spectral beings trapped together in a crumbling old house and whose final episode after five seasons last Christmas attracted 6.6 million viewers. There was an endearing bumbling charm to his pathologically helpless Berkshire county council worker Sam Pinkett in the 2013 cult sitcom The Wrong Mans, which he developed with James Corden. Even Fickelgruber wasn’t too menacing.

Surely, though, he would have been even better casting as Wonka himself? “Er, I don’t quite have the global reach of Timothée Chalamet,” he splutters. “Although, a bit like Bottom, I always think: I’d have a go at that!” He adores the way the film embraces old-fashioned spectacular storytelling. “It’s lovely to see budget being used for big choreography and lots of people dancing in a town square, and not just explosions and fights which are usually the things budget buys.”

He deplores, though, how hard it is now to get original family blockbuster entertainment greenlit. “I grew up in a golden era of that sort of thing – ET; Back to the Future. These days you can’t do anything in that area that doesn’t have existing IP. You need to give the financiers a pre-existing brand. You can’t say ‘I’ve written this idea about this kid who is friends with a crazy scientist’ and hope to make it into a big film. And that is very sad.”

You can, though, just about, still pitch original ideas with cross-generational appeal to TV. Ghosts was a rare example of a TV sitcom that enthralled adults as much as it did their children. What’s more, it did so with almost surreal placidity. In a cultural climate that seems to trade on people being as loud and divisive as possible, Baynton’s faith in an inclusive gentle comic mayhem feels positively subversive.

“Everything these days is designed to agitate because agitation is the quickest way to get someone’s attention,” he says dispiritedly. “In season two of Ghosts, we had an episode featuring a gay marriage, much to the outrage of Lady Button. But eventually she realised that the unhappiness in her own marriage stemmed from her sexually repressed homosexual husband. Softly softly, there is a thesis there. Which is that if we could just put our f---ing phones away and sit down with each face to face and talk, then [these polemical attitudes] will loosen.”

Baynton grew up in Southend, the youngest of three brothers, and spent an awful lot of time watching Monty Python and Dad’s Army with his father. He attended Rose Bruford College and then trained in clowning at the Ecole Philippe Gaulier in Paris. His first major professional success was Horrible Histories, which ran for five years from 2009; around the same time he started working with James Corden. 

“We immediately hit it off,” Baynton tells me. “We were laughing at similar things,” Corden wrote him a part in Gavin and Stacey and Baynton then approached him with the idea for The Wrong Mans. A classic British sitcom pretending to be a Hollywood thriller, in which two jobsworths find themselves inadvertently embroiled in a fast-spinning web of crime and conspiracy, like much of his work it’s quietly radical.

“I had this bee in my bonnet about how comedy at the time was never allowed to have high production values. You had single-camera family sitcoms and you had brightly lit studio sitcoms but never anything that looked like a Coen brothers movie because the budgets are so low. So we thought, if we write something along those lines with James in it, maybe someone would take a punt. But the BBC said they couldn’t afford it. They said, either you rewrite it, or we junk a lot of it. So we went to America. In the end, it became one of the first America/UK co-productions [it was a co-production between BBC Two and the US streaming platform Hulu]. And that’s now become a widespread model.”

Baynton seems to be permanently busy: he’s currently writing a comedy film, which he can’t discuss, and this year will appear in the BBC’s forthcoming adaptation of Holly Jackson’s young adult thriller A Good Girl’s Guide to Murder. He worries, though, for the future of comedy on TV. “For the sixth year running Ofcom has labelled scripted comedy [at the BBC] to be at risk,” he says. “The amount being produced is at an all-time low. I know commissioners wish they could commission more, but for whatever reason they aren’t given the budgets. Which is mad when you think about how much comedy means to people over other sorts of programmes. No one puts ‘good sense of drama’ on dating apps.” Does he think comedy has become a casualty of the culture wars in which people are increasingly fearful of causing offence?

“You might think that if you only paid attention to the culture wars,” he says. “I sometimes think the culture wars only happen in people’s minds. Comedy is wide enough to accommodate many voices. And if you just get out there and go to a comedy gig, you will see brilliant people being funny all the time.”