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yeoldenews · 1 year ago
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A Guide to Historically Accurate Regency-Era Names
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I recently received a message from a historical romance writer asking if I knew any good resources for finding historically accurate Regency-era names for their characters.
Not knowing any off the top of my head, I dug around online a bit and found there really isn’t much out there. The vast majority of search results were Buzzfeed-style listicles which range from accurate-adjacent to really, really, really bad.
I did find a few blog posts with fairly decent name lists, but noticed that even these have very little indication as to each name’s relative popularity as those statistical breakdowns really don't exist.
I began writing up a response with this information, but then I (being a research addict who was currently snowed in after a blizzard) thought hey - if there aren’t any good resources out there why not make one myself?
As I lacked any compiled data to work from, I had to do my own data wrangling on this project. Due to this fact, I limited the scope to what I thought would be the most useful for writers who focus on this era, namely - people of a marriageable age living in the wealthiest areas of London.
So with this in mind - I went through period records and compiled the names of 25,000 couples who were married in the City of Westminster (which includes Mayfair, St. James and Hyde Park) between 1804 to 1821.
So let’s see what all that data tells us…
To begin - I think it’s hard for us in the modern world with our wide and varied abundance of first names to conceive of just how POPULAR popular names of the past were.
If you were to take a modern sample of 25-year-old (born in 1998) American women, the most common name would be Emily with 1.35% of the total population. If you were to add the next four most popular names (Hannah, Samantha, Sarah and Ashley) these top five names would bring you to 5.5% of the total population. (source: Social Security Administration)
If you were to do the same survey in Regency London - the most common name would be Mary with 19.2% of the population. Add the next four most popular names (Elizabeth, Ann, Sarah and Jane) and with just 5 names you would have covered 62% of all women.
To hit 62% of the population in the modern survey it would take the top 400 names.
The top five Regency men’s names (John, William, Thomas, James and George) have nearly identical statistics as the women’s names.
I struggled for the better part of a week with how to present my findings, as a big list in alphabetical order really fails to get across the popularity factor and also isn’t the most tumblr-compatible format. And then my YouTube homepage recommended a random video of someone ranking all the books they’d read last year - and so I present…
The Regency Name Popularity Tier List
The Tiers
S+ - 10% of the population or greater. There is no modern equivalent to this level of popularity. 52% of the population had one of these 7 names.
S - 2-10%. There is still no modern equivalent to this level of popularity. Names in this percentage range in the past have included Mary and William in the 1880s and Jennifer in the late 1970s (topped out at 4%).
A - 1-2%. The top five modern names usually fall in this range. Kids with these names would probably include their last initial in class to avoid confusion. (1998 examples: Emily, Sarah, Ashley, Michael, Christopher, Brandon.)
B - .3-1%. Very common names. Would fall in the top 50 modern names. You would most likely know at least 1 person with these names. (1998 examples: Jessica, Megan, Allison, Justin, Ryan, Eric)
C - .17-.3%. Common names. Would fall in the modern top 100. You would probably know someone with these names, or at least know of them. (1998 examples: Chloe, Grace, Vanessa, Sean, Spencer, Seth)
D - .06-.17%. Less common names. In the modern top 250. You may not personally know someone with these names, but you’re aware of them. (1998 examples: Faith, Cassidy, Summer, Griffin, Dustin, Colby)
E - .02-.06%. Uncommon names. You’re aware these are names, but they are not common. Unusual enough they may be remarked upon. (1998 examples: Calista, Skye, Precious, Fabian, Justice, Lorenzo)
F - .01-.02%. Rare names. You may have heard of these names, but you probably don’t know anyone with one. Extremely unusual, and would likely be remarked upon. (1998 examples: Emerald, Lourdes, Serenity, Dario, Tavian, Adonis)
G - Very rare names. There are only a handful of people with these names in the entire country. You’ve never met anyone with this name.
H - Virtually non-existent. Names that theoretically could have existed in the Regency period (their original source pre-dates the early 19th century) but I found fewer than five (and often no) period examples of them being used in Regency England. (Example names taken from romance novels and online Regency name lists.)
Just to once again reinforce how POPULAR popular names were before we get to the tier lists - statistically, in a ballroom of 100 people in Regency London: 80 would have names from tiers S+/S. An additional 15 people would have names from tiers A/B and C. 4 of the remaining 5 would have names from D/E. Only one would have a name from below tier E.
Women's Names
S+ Mary, Elizabeth, Ann, Sarah      
S - Jane, Mary Ann+, Hannah, Susannah, Margaret, Catherine, Martha, Charlotte, Maria
A - Frances, Harriet, Sophia, Eleanor, Rebecca
B - Alice, Amelia, Bridget~, Caroline, Eliza, Esther, Isabella, Louisa, Lucy, Lydia, Phoebe, Rachel, Susan
C - Ellen, Fanny*, Grace, Henrietta, Hester, Jemima, Matilda, Priscilla
D - Abigail, Agnes, Amy, Augusta, Barbara, Betsy*, Betty*, Cecilia, Christiana, Clarissa, Deborah, Diana, Dinah, Dorothy, Emily, Emma, Georgiana, Helen, Janet^, Joanna, Johanna, Judith, Julia, Kezia, Kitty*, Letitia, Nancy*, Ruth, Winifred>
E - Arabella, Celia, Charity, Clara, Cordelia, Dorcas, Eve, Georgina, Honor, Honora, Jennet^, Jessie*^, Joan, Joyce, Juliana, Juliet, Lavinia, Leah, Margery, Marian, Marianne, Marie, Mercy, Miriam, Naomi, Patience, Penelope, Philadelphia, Phillis, Prudence, Rhoda, Rosanna, Rose, Rosetta, Rosina, Sabina, Selina, Sylvia, Theodosia, Theresa
F - (selected) Alicia, Bethia, Euphemia, Frederica, Helena, Leonora, Mariana, Millicent, Mirah, Olivia, Philippa, Rosamund, Sybella, Tabitha, Temperance, Theophila, Thomasin, Tryphena, Ursula, Virtue, Wilhelmina
G - (selected) Adelaide, Alethia, Angelina, Cassandra, Cherry, Constance, Delilah, Dorinda, Drusilla, Eva, Happy, Jessica, Josephine, Laura, Minerva, Octavia, Parthenia, Theodora, Violet, Zipporah
H - Alberta, Alexandra, Amber, Ashley, Calliope, Calpurnia, Chloe, Cressida, Cynthia, Daisy, Daphne, Elaine, Eloise, Estella, Lilian, Lilias, Francesca, Gabriella, Genevieve, Gwendoline, Hermione, Hyacinth, Inez, Iris, Kathleen, Madeline, Maude, Melody, Portia, Seabright, Seraphina, Sienna, Verity
Men's Names
S+ John, William, Thomas
S - James, George, Joseph, Richard, Robert, Charles, Henry, Edward, Samuel
A - Benjamin, (Mother’s/Grandmother’s maiden name used as first name)#
B - Alexander^, Andrew, Daniel, David>, Edmund, Francis, Frederick, Isaac, Matthew, Michael, Patrick~, Peter, Philip, Stephen, Timothy
C - Abraham, Anthony, Christopher, Hugh>, Jeremiah, Jonathan, Nathaniel, Walter
D - Adam, Arthur, Bartholomew, Cornelius, Dennis, Evan>, Jacob, Job, Josiah, Joshua, Lawrence, Lewis, Luke, Mark, Martin, Moses, Nicholas, Owen>, Paul, Ralph, Simon
E - Aaron, Alfred, Allen, Ambrose, Amos, Archibald, Augustin, Augustus, Barnard, Barney, Bernard, Bryan, Caleb, Christian, Clement, Colin, Duncan^, Ebenezer, Edwin, Emanuel, Felix, Gabriel, Gerard, Gilbert, Giles, Griffith, Harry*, Herbert, Humphrey, Israel, Jabez, Jesse, Joel, Jonas, Lancelot, Matthias, Maurice, Miles, Oliver, Rees, Reuben, Roger, Rowland, Solomon, Theophilus, Valentine, Zachariah
F - (selected) Abel, Barnabus, Benedict, Connor, Elijah, Ernest, Gideon, Godfrey, Gregory, Hector, Horace, Horatio, Isaiah, Jasper, Levi, Marmaduke, Noah, Percival, Shadrach, Vincent
G - (selected) Albion, Darius, Christmas, Cleophas, Enoch, Ethelbert, Gavin, Griffin, Hercules, Hugo, Innocent, Justin, Maximilian, Methuselah, Peregrine, Phineas, Roland, Sebastian, Sylvester, Theodore, Titus, Zephaniah
H - Albinus, Americus, Cassian, Dominic, Eric, Milo, Rollo, Trevor, Tristan, Waldo, Xavier
# Men were sometimes given a family surname (most often their mother's or grandmother's maiden name) as their first name - the most famous example of this being Fitzwilliam Darcy. If you were to combine all surname-based first names as a single 'name' this is where the practice would rank.
*Rank as a given name, not a nickname
+If you count Mary Ann as a separate name from Mary - Mary would remain in S+ even without the Mary Anns included
~Primarily used by people of Irish descent
^Primarily used by people of Scottish descent
>Primarily used by people of Welsh descent
I was going to continue on and write about why Regency-era first names were so uniform, discuss historically accurate surnames, nicknames, and include a little guide to finding 'unique' names that are still historically accurate - but this post is already very, very long, so that will have to wait for a later date.
If anyone has any questions/comments/clarifications in the meantime feel free to message me.
Methodology notes: All data is from marriage records covering six parishes in the City of Westminster between 1804 and 1821. The total sample size was 50,950 individuals.
I chose marriage records rather than births/baptisms as I wanted to focus on individuals who were adults during the Regency era rather than newborns. I think many people make the mistake when researching historical names by using baby name data for the year their story takes place rather than 20 to 30 years prior, and I wanted to avoid that. If you are writing a story that takes place in 1930 you don’t want to research the top names for 1930, you need to be looking at 1910 or earlier if you are naming adult characters.
I combined (for my own sanity) names that are pronounced identically but have minor spelling differences: i.e. the data for Catherine also includes Catharines and Katherines, Susannah includes Susannas, Phoebe includes Phebes, etc.
The compound 'Mother's/Grandmother's maiden name used as first name' designation is an educated guesstimate based on what I recognized as known surnames, as I do not hate myself enough to go through 25,000+ individuals and confirm their mother's maiden names. So if the tally includes any individuals who just happened to be named Fitzroy/Hastings/Townsend/etc. because their parents liked the sound of it and not due to any familial relations - my bad.
I did a small comparative survey of 5,000 individuals in several rural communities in Rutland and Staffordshire (chosen because they had the cleanest data I could find and I was lazy) to see if there were any significant differences between urban and rural naming practices and found the results to be very similar. The most noticeable difference I observed was that the S+ tier names were even MORE popular in rural areas than in London. In Rutland between 1810 and 1820 Elizabeths comprised 21.4% of all brides vs. 15.3% in the London survey. All other S+ names also saw increases of between 1% and 6%. I also observed that the rural communities I surveyed saw a small, but noticeable and fairly consistent, increase in the use of names with Biblical origins.
Sources of the records I used for my survey: 
Ancestry.com. England & Wales Marriages, 1538-1988 [database on-line].
Ancestry.com. Westminster, London, England, Church of England Marriages and Banns, 1754-1935 [database on-line].
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roadkillxd · 3 months ago
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Alpha price fucking his little omega through his heat? Maybe it’s a poly where reader is the entire team’s omega (if you’re okay with writing that, ik you just did a poly team x reader) and they help their baby boy through his heat together as one big strange dysfunctional pack
Two years late, but...
Poly!141 x M!Reader ↪ 1998 words — 18+ / SMUT.
Content tags — cis male dominant alpha Price, cis male switch alpha Ghost, cis male switch alpha Soap, cis male switch alpha Gaz, dual-sex male submissive omega reader, a/b/o dynamic, pack hierarchies, voyeurism, breeding, gangbang/group sex, scenting/scent glands, knotting, natural lubrication, biting, oral sex, vaginal sex, penetrative sex, unsafe sex, and established relationship.
While the op had been successful, it had run overtime, head on into a near week long blizzard that had snowed the team into the safe house and made neither extraction by air nor land possible. The few extra heat suppressants you’d brought in case of emergency had only done so much, especially in the face of your circumstances.
While the old building was equipped with an even older heating system, the rusted burner hadn’t been run nor the oil replaced in what you could only assume had been years. Soap had spent a handful of hours running safety checks while the taskforce kept (tactically) huddled for warmth, the Scot finally determining the old hunk of junk wouldn’t blow the place and everyone inside to smithereens the second it was turned on. 
Safe to run, but the oil was so degraded it burned twice as fast and the tank was only three quarters full, which meant rationing.
Then Soap had mentioned to Price that shit oil makes more exhaust, and while it was the middle of a blizzard in fuck-knows, Russia, they did have valuable (and very stolen) data on them that they’d obtained (very much stolen) not even a few days prior.
So thus, more rationing. Just enough heat to keep everyone from freezing to death, which wasn’t much.
You and the lads had taken two of the three sizable mattresses and pushed them together on the floor, gathering all the blankets and spare linens you could dig out of the basement and closets to make a massive nest to help insulate heat. 
The only time any of you got up out of the thing was to shut the heat on or off, piss or shit, or use the little electronic hotplate Ghost always brought with him; heating snow to wash with or make tea with, or cooking the pantry’s stash of canned beans (that’d expired a month prior) once you’d run out of MREs.
Being out of suppressants in a freezing, enclosed space, nesting near non-stop with the four very fertile alphas whos’ cocks you regularly took was already a pretty good concoction for triggering a flash heat. 
You forgot to take into account you skipped your last medically mandated heat, klepping an extra box of the little pills from the MTF in order to skip your placebos.
Your heat hit hard and fast, awakening you in the night with cold chills, an obscene amount of slick tacky between your bare thighs, your cock achingly hard and hole achingly empty.
Price, who’d been pressed up to your back in nothing but ratty sweats and wool thick socks, awoke first. The scent of your heat slick made his nose twitch, his throat thick with saliva as his cock grew so hard so quickly he might’ve been dizzy if he hadn’t been lying down. 
You keened low in your throat at the smell of his arousal blanketing you—wood smoke and something like wet grass—and shivered at his answering growl, his muscle-corded arms squeezing tight around you as he pressed his mouth to your throat, licking wetly over your scent gland. 
“You’re burning up,” he murmurs with a shuddering breath, his beard tickling your oversensitive skin and making you whimper, “Mmh, I’ve got you, lad.”
He sucks bruises around your gland, his free hand wasting no time in shoving his sweats far enough down his thighs to free his throbbing cock. His first few thrusts are sloppy and uncoordinated with the remains of sleep, his prick pushing between your slick wet thighs. 
“Please~!” You whine, the friction of his cock slipping through your folds maddening in your heat drunk state. You push your hips back as he thrusts forward again, the bulbous tip catching on your entrance before popping past the tight ring of muscle. You nearly scream as his fat cock bullies into your sopping cunt, his hand coming up to cover your mouth, muffling your desperate moans as he fucks into you.
“Slutty little omega,” he rumbles, his voice dripping with affection despite the words, “gonna wake the others, hm?”
He snarls against the back of your neck, teeth digging in to scruff you before he shoves the blankets down off your bodies. One hand over your mouth and the other gripping your thigh bruisingly tight, he rolls onto his back with you in his grasp, his cock carefully kept sheathed as he plants his feet and begins to pound up into you, his heavy balls slapping wetly against the base of your shaft and forcing your moans up a pitch.
Price unscruffs you, teeth returning to scrape along your pulsing gland. Your head lulls onto his shoulder, gaze turning to the side to see the glint of the dim oil lamp reflected in Soap’s sky blue eyes, locked onto where Price’s prick thrusts in and out with obscene squelches. 
His blanket shifts with the movement of his arm, and you belatedly realize he’s stroking himself off to the sight of you being bred by your shared pack Alpha, a mere yard away. You whine longingly, a gush of slick squirting from your cunt as you try to beckon the other Alpha over to you, using your wanton scent to draw his instincts. 
The second he tries to move, scrambling onto his hands and knees, the large shadow of Ghost is on him, pinning him down by the scruff of his neck and rumbling so deep in his chest it barely registers in your ears. 
“Get first dibs,” he rumbles, pulling up his mask just enough to nip threateningly at Soap’s ear, a warning, before he releases the Scot, shuffling across the mattress to settle between yours and Price’s legs.
“Oh, c’mon, Lt!” the Sergeant bemoans weakly.
Soap sulks, but knows the order of operations is in place for a reason—remembers how the first time you’d gone into heat, Ghost had nearly torn Soap to shreds when the Scot tried to claim you first, the Lieutenants already trauma-sensitive instincts forced into overdrive in the face of your hormones.
Soap knew Ghost only bent the knee to Price when he was like this, and so he grumbles unhappily, and grabs a pillow to hump as he settles in to watch and wait for his turn.
The movement of Price’s hips slows as Ghost nuzzles against yours and the Captain’s thighs, sucking at the scent glands there as if he could drink down both of your scents. His over-long tongue licks around the wet seam where Price’s cock splits you wide, making the both of your hips twitch, before he trails sucking wet kisses up the shaft of your small cock, rumbling happily, the sharp scent of charcoal mingling with Price’s own musk as he takes the throbbing prick into his mouth and down to the root with ease. 
You cry out, back arching as he suckles, drinking down the copious amounts of precum your tip weeps. Price begins fucking up into you again in slow, heavy thrusts that have the head of his cock poking against your womb every single time. The movement in turn makes Ghost’s head bob up and down your length, wet slurping and gagging resounding through the room as he feasts, Price’s balls tapping the man’s chin with each thrust.
Soap shuffles over to you slowly, keeping his posture low to the mattress so as to not pose a threat to either of the primary Alphas. Price gives a warning rumble, but settles when Soap merely leans down to lick at the hand covering your mouth, asking wordlessly for permission to kiss you. Price’s hand moves instead to your throat, and Soap wastes no time sloppily licking into your mouth and huffing happily with the uncoordination of your own lips, too fucked out and overwhelmed to kiss back properly. 
A growl like a dying engine has you jolting, the vibrations around your prick having you crying out against Soap’s lips. You turn your gaze down to Ghost to see Gaz sidling up behind the Lieutenant, a gentle hand rubbing up and down the larger man’s bicep. Gaz only lets out a placating purr in response, a sound more befitting of an Omega.
“Easy, sir,” Gaz murmurs softly, soothing.
Ghost has pulled off of your cock, lapping absentmindedly at the pulsing flesh as he watches Gaz like a hawk, a wild dog guarding its meal. Over the heady, aroused musk of the three alphas, you can make out the calming honey and chamomile of Gaz’s unnaturally sweet scent as he intentionally pushes it outward, leaning down below Ghost’s head to mouth at Price’s sac, tongue lathering over the course hairs before sucking one then the other into his mouth. Both Ghost and Price rumble their satisfaction, their hindbrains basking in the supplication of one of their pack’s secondary Alphas.
While Price’s thrusts are significantly slower to accommodate the two men forcing your legs apart around their shared bulk, the sensation is no less satisfying, your cunt milking Price’s cock, stimulating his knot in hopes of making it swell.
Price grips your hair with one hand, turning you back toward Soap who’s now knelt beside your head, his cock purplish red and dripping with neglect.
“Go on, Sunshine,” Price rumbles, “been good n’ patient. Be gentle, now.”
Soap rubs his tip across your lips, smearing the pre like gloss before you part your kiss swollen lips, moaning wantonly around the length as he shallowly fucks your mouth.
You can feel Price’s knot slowly swelling, catching on your sore and abused rim with each thrust. Soap has gone from quick, shallow thrusts to slow and deep, the ocean scent of him filling your nostrils each time his pubes tickle your nose. You can feel how stilted his movements are, careful to keep from losing control and simply mounting the hot wet hole of your mouth in fear of setting off the other Alphas. 
Ghost’s hand has taken to stroking you, him and Gaz mouthing at either of Price’s balls, taking turns lapping where his knot swells or tongue fucking each other’s mouths with heady little growls and grunts permeating the wet sounds of their lips. 
You whine pathetically at the barrage of sensations, your cunt tightening up as you grow impossibly close to orgasm. Price bites down hard at the junction of your neck and shoulder, just below your gland as he slams his hips up, his knot finally popping into you with a wet squelch and a deafening growl muffled and buried into your flesh.
You cum hard around his knot, milking the thick bulb of it as rope after rope of his seed fills you. Your cum, more like squirt, is met with eager whines from Ghost who struggles to lap all of it up before it drips down from your tummy to the bedsheet, earning a soft, amused huff from Gaz as he presses gentling kisses to the Lieutenant’s throat and shoulder. 
Soap’s prick twitches in your mouth, your eyes wet with tears looking up at him as he fists his own knot, cumming with just the tip past your plush lips, not wanting you to choke. He bites his lip to muffle his groan, his spend contradictorily bitter and sweet as you swallow it down with a pleased purr.
Price’s knot has barely deflated, slipping out from under you before Ghost is already knelt between your thighs, hefting your bottom half into his lap, pressing his fat cock into you, the warm cum of Price’s load making the Lieutenant moan brokenly.
Soap sidles up behind Ghost, and you can tell from the movements of his arm and the sutter of Ghost’s hips that Soap’s playing with the larger Alpha’s ass, the way you know Ghost likes. Price lifts your head to make you gulp down water before Gaz is straddling your chest, pressing his own cock past your lips. 
You realize, fucked out and pleased, that you’re in for a long, strenuous night.
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shurisneakers · 6 months ago
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unsolved (vi)
Summary: Bucky doesn't even believe in the paranormal. So who the hell thought it was a good idea to stick him in a series about everything haunted for the internet's amusement? With his loose-canon of a teammate who has no concept of subtlety or shits left to give, to make things even worse. (Buzzfeed unsolved AU)
Warnings: swearing, frustrated bucky, obnoxious reader, mentions of hauntings and the paranormal.
A/N: i need to start editing beforehand this series honestly takes to long to edit omg this was supposed to come out 2 hours ago. also thanks so much to @ginevranights for the one tweet in here, and @thebisexual-disaster for calling bucky babygirl because it was incredibly funny to me
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Previous part || Series masterlist
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Everyone is besotted with the cat.
It makes sense– everyone hates Bucky and will dance with glee upon his downfall. This is all his opinion, of course. The truth is that it is a cat and exists and everyone is thrilled. 
Sensing his awful vibes towards her and the constant suspicion he thinks of her with, she decides she likes sitting outside his room at the early hours of the morning and screaming for him to open up.
Once he does, she strolls in leisurely, takes a look around and then strolls back out. Everyday. On the clock. An alarm clock that will cough up a hairball in front of his door should he not open it to her. 
Also turns out she doesn’t have brown spots, the cat was just dirty. She’s pure white and you’ve taken to calling her something to do with snow or blizzards or something. 
She is his mortal enemy. Bucky doesn’t stop to think that his biggest problem being a feud with a cat is possibly an indication that his life has gotten significantly better. 
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As with every week, you bang on his door on Friday morning.
Bucky, who's just fallen asleep after the stupid cat ceremoniously woke him up that morning, does not find this ritual as entertaining as you do, but his opinion has rarely held weightage in matters such as his sanity or his sleep schedule. 
He does considr for a whole day that you and the cat are in cahoots to ensure he is as miserable as possible. It wasn’t outside the realm of possibility– Sam talked to birds or and Clint talked to lizards or whatever.
You yell something incomprehensible to him. Bucky yells something back. The world keeps spinning, nothing changes.
Other than the sinking feeling on his chest, that was a bit more pronounced than usual, to the point where it’s a bit hard to breathe.
He pries open one eye, ready to name five things he sees, four things he hears, three things he touches.
The stupid cat smacks him in the face. 
He shoves her off his torso, and along with her, the sinking feeling also reduces. 
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After a very useful day of staying in bed no less than three attempts to get back to sleep, Bucky sneaks out of the tower when dusk begins to fall to hopefully get some rest on the park’s grass.  
It’s a nice evening out, the sky was painted a burnt orange, and the air wasn’t too chilly. He could even stop for a burger on the way back to top off a lovely nap. 
But even a gorgeous sunset is not enough to distract him from his heightene awareness going off.
From the corner of his eye, he sees a black van trailing slowly behind him.
He picks up the pace, jogging past a street food vendor and a newspaper stand, and the van only speeds up to keep up.
Soon enough, Bucky breaks into a sprint, ducking into an alleyway and waiting until the van drives past him before stalking back out, eyes vigilant.
Whatever. Stalker be damned, he was going to go to the fucking park. And get a burger. 
But the second he makes a turn on the street corner, the same black van pulls right up to him, not leavning even two feet of space between it and him.
Bucky, annoyed and with 80 years worth of boredom with this schtick, scowls as he yanks open the damn door, ready to just punch and move on with his day.
“Get in loser, we’re going out,” you call from the driver’s seat.
He growls, letting the handle go. “What the actual fuck is wrong with you?”
“What’s wrong with me? I literally told you in the afternoon that I’m picking you up and you starting running from me, you baboon,” you exclaim. “Is that what you’re wearing in this video? Did you not do your laundry?”
Alright, so maybe it was on him to figure out what you actually yelled at him through the door earlier in the day. That doesn’t stop him.
Nostrils flaring, he continues to ignore you. “Who the fuck does this? Why do you have a van?”
“Style,” you insist. “We’re gonna be late, now come on. We’re leaving.”
Sensing that this conversation had reached a standstill, Bucky employs his next best technique.
“Where?” he demands.
“You’ll find out when we get there. Now get in,” you pat the spot next to you before pulling up your phone. “We’ll get there in about an hour–”
“No.”
Your neck cranes slowly to look at him incredulously. “The fuck you mean ‘no’?”
“You could be kidnapping me.” He stands with his arms crossed, tone defiant. 
“Right,” you snort. “You seen yourself? Food laws say I need a cooling truck to transport that much beef around.”
Bucky feels his mouth opening and shutting almost immediately, a strange feeling creeping into the tips of his ears.   
He clears his throat. “I’m not getting in the car unless you tell me where we’re going.”
“I’m not fuckin’ kidnapping you Bucky,” you say, loudly. “And even if I wanted to do it– which I don’t, because you can be so annoying sometimes– you’d never see it coming.” 
“How would I know?” He’s offended that you only think he’s annoying sometimes when he’s been working very hard to make sure it’s a constant feature of his. “Who’s to say there’s not some guy in there with a gun–”
“A gun wouldn’t do shit when you’re so thick in the head–”
“And then SHIELD’s gonna have to shell out the ransom–”
“SHIELD would pay them to keep you.” 
“Oh, so you are kidn–”
“Get in the car,” you say loudly before sitting upright, and turning your attention to the windshield again. “Or don’t. I don’t give a shit.”
He narrows his eyes at you grabbing the steering wheel, while your telekinesis moves to close the door on him.  
Bucky sticks his metal hand between the door and the car, and pries it back open before climbing in. 
“Now what,” he mumbles, arms still crossed over his chest like he’s throwing a tantrum. He even refuses to put the seatbelt. Rebellion. 
You don’t answer, and the car doesn’t move.
When he looks over at you, you have a triumphant, smug smile on your face.  
“What,” he bites. 
You tsk. “Reverse psychology. Always works with children.”
Bucky immediately grabs at the handle, but the locks immediately click into place and you step on the pedal and send the van flying down the road before he has a chance to throw himself out. 
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The car pulls up to a mansion. 
All the windows are closed and covered in newspaper, giving him no indication as to what was inside. The lawn was mostly brown, with weeds taking up more space than grass and dead flowers lining the fence. 
“There’s gotta be like 5 bedrooms in that thing,” you note, as you both make your way towards it. “How many ghosts do you think are in there?”
“Zero,” Bucky states plainly. 
You continue to talk like he doesn’t exist. “A house that big, there’s gotta be a ghost butler in there. Maybe a ghost maid.”
“None.”
“Five ghost maids, one for every room, and maybe a cook–”
Bucky starts speed walking, leaving you behind to admire the structure looming over the both of you, only illuminated by the streetlights outside.  
Bucky knocks hard on the door, annoyed that it was getting colder and that he was stuck in his stupid running shorts in a house that definitely had no heating for the evening. 
Eventually, you end up beside him, talking as he keeps his sight fixed right ahead. 
Checking your phone to confirm the address, you mumble absentmindedly to him, “This kid tweeted us like fifteen times in the last week, this is gonna be a sick surprise. I love meeting my fa–”
“A surprise?” Bucky jerks his head towards you. “You didn’t tell him we’re coming?”
“Well no,” you lower your phone, “because that would give the ghosts some warning and we–”
His eyes nearly bug out of his head. “We can’t just go into some random kid’s house and film–”
“He’s hardly random, he’s been bombarding our inbox–”
Your defence is cut off when the door creaks open painfully, slowly, like it was letting out its last dying breath.
“Woah,” you whisper, eyes wide. “Ghost door.”
“Shut the fuck up,” Bucky mumbles.
“Hello?” you call out.
When no one replies immediately, Bucky shoves his hands into his pockets, ready to leave. 
Instead, you shove him to the side, taking his pace in front of the house. He offers no resistance, only a growl in annoyance. 
You clear your throat, before calling loudly, “Hewwo–”
A dark hooded figure springs out at breakneck speed from behind the door, arms raised high, legs wide. 
You don’t look fazed at all, staying entirely still, only with one eyebrow raised.
“Right,” you say. “You must be Jason.”   
“Yuh,” he answers.  
“Where are your parents?” Bucky demands immediately, choosing to ignore the full body cringe his own words give him. 
“Indianna or something, man. I dunno?” The door trembles open a bit more, giving you a clearer look at the guy. “Do you guys wanna come in? It’s cold.”
You take a step inside the huge foyer, almost steretoypically complete with a cascading staircase and big paintings of people on horses and stuff.
 Jason eventually peels the hoodie away from his face, shoving his arms inside the sleeves and spinning it around so he was wearing it the right way. 
“This is Bucky, by the way,” you introduce before beckoning to the man who had refused to move all this while. “Come on, babygirl.”
Bucky does not look wowed with the theatrics as he stands there, arms folded tight across his magnificent chest. 
Jason looks at you. “Is babygirl coming?”
Bucky inhales sharply while you stifle a laugh. “Do not call me that.”
“Oh, he loves it when people call him that, he’s just super pissy because he didn’t get enough attention today,” you coo. “Get in here Bucky.” 
He glares at you with enough intensity to set the house on fire.   
The kid looks like he’s in his early twenties, with shaggy brown hair that hides sleepy eyes, bad posture and a clean shaven face.. His hoodie is paired with grey sweatpants and yellow flip flops that were about one size too small for him. 
“Why’d you tweet at us?” Bucky questions, wondering what he had to do with anything.  
Jason juts his chin up contemplatively. “What do you guys do again?”
You stare at him to avoid how Bucky was staring at you. 
“We hunt ghosts and help old ladies cross the street.” You flash him a smile. 
“Cool.” Jason nods appreciatively. “I don’t have an old lady here.” 
Your eyebrow twitches. Bucky would have taken great joy in your awkwardness had he not felt entirely exasperated by the whole exchange. 
“Well, Jason, you DM’d us about the ghost in the house,” you communicate even slower. “The one that was being rude?”
“Oh, right,” he drags out. “You’re the people from YouTube. Avengers. I didn't think y’all were real, lol.”
“What the fuck.” Bucky mumbles to himself, because there was no way this guy said ‘LOL’ out loud.  “Did you just invite us inside your house without knowing who we are–”  
“Yes, we’re those people,” you interrupt, pulling out a card from your fucking sleeve. “The Graveyard Shift crew, ready and at your service.”
“Since when do we have business cards?” Bucky presses.
“Ignore him, he’s an intern.” You drop the card onto Jason’s hand. “Anyway, we’re the best rated ghost hunters within a twenty yard radius. Maybe even thirty, but I don't wanna get too ahead of myself.”
“Radical.” He flips the card back and forth without actually reading anything. Bucky wonders if he was looking for pictures. “Aren’t you supposed to have like, tech and people and stuff?”
“Some of us have performance anxiety–” you give Bucky a side eye and he rightfully looks absolutely incensed. “So, I’ve got a camera following us at all times and I’ve got all the tech we need.”
Bucky suddenly feels very aware of something hovering behind him, and it takes an incredible amount of self-restraint to not instinctually slap it out of existence.
He whips around to find a camera floating mid air, aimed directly at him almost like it is waiting for a reaction. While weird, it was still better than the stupid GoPro on his head that elongated his forehead to a sixhead.
“And I’ve got a REM Pod, a spirit box to pick up sounds when they talk to us, a water gun full of assorted waters from different beliefs for one gigantic spirit burning milkshake–” you list rapidly and Bucky cannot even tell where the fuck you’re pulling these things out from. “So, we should be good to go.”
Jason doesn’t look bothered at all, as he drags out, “Cool, lol.”
Bucky almost feels offended on your behalf by the little twerp. 
“Hold this,” you instruct, pressing the spirit box into Bucky's chest without giving him a choice. “Ready whenever you are, but before we start I just wanted to ask– why’d you come to us for help? I’m sure you have plenty of options.”
“Oh,” the guy says, wiping his hands down the side of his sweatpants. “You guys are Avengers and stuff…”
He doesn’t add anything else, watching you both like it was obvious. 
When neither of you offer an answer, he continues “I mean, no one else seemed to like, know kickboxing and shi–”
“I’m sorry– kickboxing?”
“Or like, karate.” He lifted his shoulder in a half shrug. “Whatever you guys are into, I don’t really care what style of combat it is.”
When it finally clicks, Bucky snorts. “You want us to fuckin’ fight your ghost?”
“Yeah, like a punch or something, I guess.” Jason looks too serious. “He’s being a real bitch dick.”
You exhale steadily. “First of all, how do you know it’s a ‘he’?”
Jason shakes his head, and his hair falls directly into his one eye, leaving you to only look at the other. “I’m pretty sure it’s my uncle.”
“Your uncle?” 
“Well yeah,” the guy responds, “this is his house. He built it and decorated it and shit.” 
You stare at him in disbelief. “You didn’t mention that in the brief.”
Bucky looks at you. “You got a brief?”
“Uh, yeah, it’s my uncle’s house, I guess,” Jason continues when you wave Bucky off. “He, like, kicked the bucket a few years ago. Like, totally died off.”
Bucky’s eyebrows knit together. 
“We weren’t, like, close or anything but I guess he didn’t have any other relatives which figures, because he’s a pain in the ass, but I’m the next male heir or whatever, so I got it.”
“Male heir,” Bucky repeats slowly, wondering which fucking TV show he’s walked into.
“A 6BHK in this economy is a fuckin’ castle,” you shush him, turning to Jason again. “Didn’t you bother renovating or anything?”
“Clearly not,” Bucky mumbles, because he may have only known Jason for a grand total of a few minutes, but he really doubts that it was he who picked out redwood furniture and gold trimmings. 
“Nah, I don’t care. I usually spend all day doing gigs at my friend’s house but he told me I can’t keep throwing ragers there every night so I wanna do that here but he’s just being a big baby about it,” he explains all in one breath.
“What gigs?” Bucky asks curiously.
“I’m a DJ who specialises in acoustic EDM,” he says, chest puffing in pride. 
“Of course.” Bucky nods in return. 
Jason turns to you. “Didn’t think you guys were coming, not gonna lie.”
“You just do that whole door opening show to everyone?” you ask, amused.
“Uh, no, I just heard you guys arguing outside and thought it’d be funny,” he says. “I got you guys good, lol.” 
“Well, not me,” you counter, “but Bucky, for sure, pissed his pants a litt–”
“Anyway, here’s the keys. I’m out,” Jason cuts in. “It’s my last three performances at Rick’s house.” 
He tosses the key at babygirl’s Bucky’s chest, who instinctively catches it with ease.  
“You’re just giving us the house for the night?” Bucky stares at him incredulously. 
“Yuh. There’s, like, beer in the fridge if you want. No one delivers here ‘cause someone snitched that this place is haunted, which was kinda fucked. So there’s ramen in the fridge too if you’re hungry.”
“Why is there ramen in–”
“See y’all later, lol,” he takes off without another word. 
Bucky’s left staring after the guy who just strolls down the garden and out the gate without a second look.
“I think I want to adopt him.” Your gaze trails after him, before you crack your knuckles. “Alright. Let’s get this guy’s bitch dick uncle.”
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The longer Bucky spends in the house, he can tell with absolute certainty that someone loved this place deeply. It is styled and decorated with the flair of a passion project, even though it currently looked like it dreamed of being a landfill when it grew up. There were cobwebs everywhere and several dust bunnies in every corner, and also many crushed cans of beer all around the floor. 
The previous owner had taste for sure. Bucky’s not sure if he’d appreciate Jason turning it into the newest hotspot for his ragers. Whatever that meant. 
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“How long are we going to be here?” he asks, swiping a finger across the table. 
“Why, you got something to do?” you pause before adding, “Or someone to do?”
He sends you a jaded glance. “None of your business.”
“You literally called me the love of your life.” You scoff from your corner of the room. 
“You called yourself that,” Bucky reminds monotonously. 
“And you have never denied it.”
“I’m denying it right no-”
“Bzzt, too late. Anyway,” you announce. “Your hot date will have to be postponed, I fear. We are not leaving until we get some sort of proof.”
“Two hours.” Bucky holds up two dust coated fingers.
“I’ll buy you a pretzel.”
“Three hours.” His middle finger goes up in solidarity. 
You grin. “More than enough. We’re gonna make you a believer, babygirl.”
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True, and surprisingly enough, an hour later, his whole life changes. 
“Holy shit,” Bucky can’t quite believe his eyes either, stomach turning. 
“What?” You’re somewhere behind, stupid machine held up as you spin around like a ballerina waiting for something to do something and make a noise or some shit. He doesn’t know. 
Bucky has tucked the spirit box behind his ear like a pencil, arms gripping the doors.
“What the hell,” he trails off slowly, eyes glued to the sight in front of him, hypnotising.
“Did you find something?” you whisper-yell, and the camera whizzes past you into his line of sight.
Bucky swallows the bile in his throat. 
“When he said ramen’s in the fridge, I didn’t think he meant he boiled a fuckin’ bucket full of noodles and just left it in there. What the fuck.” He grabs the aforementioned bucket and lifts it into the air. “Who does this? What the fuck?”
You let out a huff, lightly stomping yor foot. “Be so serious right now.”
“Are you crazy? Look at this.” Bucky spins it around to look at it from every angle. “It’s got ‘Jason’s ramen’ written on it. Who the fuck else’s would this be?”
“You’re supposed to be looking for ghosts,” you insist. “That is demonic behaviour. It’s not the same.”
“I’m lookin’ for snacks,” Bucky puts the damn bucket back and ignores it to look through the rest of the fridge. “There’s nothing here. What does that kid eat?”
“If you’re looking for snacks, you gotta look in the mirror,” you hum hopefully. 
“Hilarious.” Bucky’s voice comes back muddled from the several bottles of beer in the fridge. 
“I’m sorry, you’re right. It’s not useful.” you correct, “You said you’re looking for snacks, not a whole meal.”
He stops briefly. Bucky’s not sure what to do with all this strange attention you give him. It makes him feel all sorts of ways and he doesn’t like it one bit. 
“Whatever,” he mutters, continuing to scavenge. 
“Woah, calm down there, Prince Charming.” You snicker. “Give a person a warning before pulling out all your best lines on me like that.”
“You’re supposed to be working, not flirting,” Bucky responds, feeling the same burn at the tip of his ears from that evening. 
“When I was in the events business, multitasking was considered a valuable and necessary skill.”
Bucky stands up so fast he nearly hits his head on the fridge.
“What’s with all these random jobs you keep saying you’ve done?” he questions. “They told me you went on the run a long time ago and that’s where you met Nat.”
Your face changes, features becoming more solemn. He doesn’t know what’s going on, because he’s never seen you this serious before, not even when you guys were hanging out in the library. 
“Bucky,” your voice drops a few octaves, straight and steady. “Answer me this honestly.”
He feels a bit defensive because it almost feels like he’s fucked up somehow.
“What?” he questions. 
You watch him for another second before taking a step toward him, observing him closely.
“Did you really ask people about me?” 
He straightens up ever so slightly. “Why?”
You look at him gravely. “I got one more question.”
You take another step, reducing the space btween you to almost a ciminally low amount. Bucky’s sure he can hear your heartbeat. 
You watch his eyes look into yours intently, a flciker or doubt there.
You open your mouth, voice low and strong, “When will you admit to yourself you’re obsessed with me?”
It takes a second for it to register, and almost instantly he shoves you away, only to have you break into a laugh. 
“You’re so fucking annoying.”
“You have a crush on me,” you sing, “why else are you going around asking your friends about me? Do you want them to put in a good word? You gonna ask them to deliver your handwritten note to me?”
“Fuck right off, and then fuck off some more,” he barks, grabbing a beer from the front of the line. 
“Don’t worry, Buck, I think you’re the cutest guy in our whole grade, no competition,” you drawl, grinning at the pissed expression on his face. 
Bucky swerves around you to beeline to the kitchen island to drink his stupid beer in peace. He thinks that his retirement age is actually nearing. 
A house like this, with a room for Steve and another guest room for whoever wanted to visit. Possibly a dog. There wasn’t musch left in life to do, so he may as well spend the rest of it out in the suburbs in quiet. 
A few seconds later, you break the silence with, “But to answer your question: I did go on the run. I just did all those jobs while I was running.”
He turns to you, noting that while your face was light, it seemed like there was sincerity and truth in what you were saying. 
“Why?” he asks, voice gruff.
You shrug, half a smile on your face. “Why not? I met Nat when she broke down the door of my accountancy office on one of her missions. I threw some staplers and hit a guy with a printer, and from then on, whenever I needed help or she needed my freaky little powers, we’d reach out. Years later, she asked if I wanted to come join, I was bored and now here we are. I’m a nepo baby, if you kinda think about it.” 
Bucky looks at you, but says nothing. 
“Anyway, brief history aside, I’m going upstairs. There’s nothing here other than your bitchy aura and bucket ramen.” The camera spins around to follow you.
Bucky simply ignores you as he swipes all the garbage off the counter and onto the ground so he can lean against it, alone with his beer and new information to process.
However, a loud creek, unmistakable and intense, comes from the floor above. 
You look at Bucky. He doesn’t look the least bit bothered, instead using his metal hand to pop open a beer he fished out of the damn fridge. 
“Can you shut up,” you hiss when he drinks a little too loud for your liking. 
“What,” he asks through a mouthful of beer as he drops the bottle cap onto the counter.
Another creek reverberates loudly through the house.
You make a face at him, somewhere in a mix between excitement and anticipation. 
“Is that supposed to mean something?” he inquires.
“Two creeks in the last minute,” you insist, like he’s stupid. 
He scoffs. “So? It’s an old house, if you breathe too hard the floor’s gonna fall off.”
“It is literally not that old. And second, it’s too much of a coincidence.” You make way towards the stairs, beckoning for him to follow. “And take the spirit box out of your hair, we need to catch if it’s saying something.”
“You're not gonna catch anything because it’s not going to speak because ghosts are not real.” He takes a large swig. 
You ignore him, leaving in search of the sound.
Bucky takes a second before following you anyway, bored out of his mind and with nothing really to do.
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“You comin’ in?” he asks from inside the spacious room, beer in hand. 
“I didn’t even buy you dinner yet and you’re already inviting me into your bedroom.”
“Jesus Christ. Stay outside then.”
The room has a strange, musty smell. Bucky, sick and tired of the ebay this kid has been living, drags open the window to let some fresh air in, going so far as to tear a large hole through the newspaper to let the moonlight into the room. 
“Someone keeps moving the furniture back and forth, there’s scratches all over the floor,” you observe, pointing to the ground near the table and the bed. 
“Uh huh,” he says, tossing the spirit box onto the table before taking another swig, ducking out of the way of the camera. 
You scan every corner with the machine in your hand. Bucky wanders around aimlessly for a second before usefully sitting on the bed, leaning against the pillows. 
“You gonna take your shirt off next?” you question. 
Bucky rolls his eyes, taking another sip from his bottle. “Pay attention. Your demons are trying to talk t-.” 
The bed immediately lurches from underneath him, scraping loudly against the wood. 
“What the fuck–” he exclaims, getting right back up, heart in his throat for a damn second. 
You stifle a laugh.
“I’ve had enough of you today.” He puts the damn bottle down on the nightstand. “I’m leaving.” 
“We didn’t even light the candles yet, you can’t–”
The bed scrapes back into place again, but this time Bucky is prepared and done. 
“Stop doing that,” he snaps, “you’re ruining the flo–”
“I didn’t do that,” you tell him, eyebrows and hands raised, “That definitely wasn’t me.”
“Hardy har har. You didn’t push the bed, you didn’t climb the tree in the cemetery, you didn’t conjure up hallucinations of my–” He stops himself abruptly.
It’s too late, though. You very much caught it. 
The look you give him is peculiar. “Hallucinations of your what?” 
“Nothing,” he utters. “Got my wires crossed. Nothing to do with you.”
“Okay,” you drag out, giving him one more uncanny look before turning your attention to the bedpost. “Anyway, I promise you the second one was definitely not me. There’s something else going on here.”
Bucky is starkly sent back to fifteen minutes ago and his thoughts of retirement as he watches you crouch by the floor.
He was too old for this. He was not right for this. The three second glance at his dead sister and his entire life had gone lopsided. Honestly, he could probably handle like two or three more episodes of this nonsense before tapping out completely. 
“I can sense something,” you announce.
“I can sense something too,” he murmurs absentmindedly to himself. “It’s called bullshi–”
“Be quiet, I want to see if we can talk to the guy in the room.” You hold your hand up. “Hey Jason’s uncle. You here?”
He watches, unamused, as nothing changes. No machine beeps, nothing creeks.
“Bucky, you scared him away.” You turn to him, hands on your hips. “You used your big bitch face and you scared away th–”
He launches a pillow at you. It lowers to the ground without ever touching you. 
“Go eat some bucket ramen and maybe you’ll be less bitchy.” Your face lights up, and he can tell you’ve gotten another stupid idea. “Jason’s uncle, are you hungry? Do you want something to eat? Human blood? Metal arm?”
Silence.
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“No pretzels for you,” you tsk, but let go of the idea anyway. 
“Maybe your ghost boyfriend likes them, why don’t you ask him?” He pulls out his phone to book himself an Uber. “And since he literally doesn’t talk and you don’t shut up, it’d be a great ma–”
The same pillow he launched at you gets thrown back at him. He simply ducks out of the way, and it hits the nightstand, toppling the bottle over.
“Now look at what you did,” you accuse, pointing at the bottle with the camera following suit. 
“The fuck? I didn't do shit–” Bucky stops speaking when something nudges his leg. 
The bottle that initially had clattered to the ground quite a feet away from him was now by his foot.
“Interesting,” you muse.
“What?” he questions immediately. “That a bottle rolled? It’s a bottle. They do that.”
“Uh huh. Come stand here then.” You jut your thumb out to a few paces away. 
He rolls his eyes but takes a large stride towards you.  
Annoyingly, the bottle rolls right along with him and lands up at his feet.
“Ghost,” you nod along certainly. 
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“Why isn't it doing that then?” he argues on instinct, and then his mind catches up, forcing him to take a step back and wonder why the fuck he was still in the house. 
Once again, he genuinely believes that this should be enough. Ghost hunted for a few episodes, read a few stories. He thinks his numbers should be up and that would be convincing enough for Maya to let him get away from the series, especially if he played his 80-years-of-imprisonment card right.  
“You're right.” You peer at him before turning your head up to the ceiling. “Please, ghost man. Please, I’m begging you, hit this man. Plea–”
Bucky feels something smack lightly against the back of his head before falling to the ground.
A second later you erupt into cheers and he turns around to look at the culprit.
A crumpled up piece of paper.  He bends down to pick it up, finding nothing special about it other than some random scribbles. Probably some more of Jason's junk. 
“Ghosts are real and they hate Bucky Barnes, baby!,” you cheer. “Ohh, I’m gonna make so much money. Babygirl, you are a poltergeist magnet. ”
“It’s a piece of paper and the window is open,” he groans, tossing it back onto the ground, where it dances around, proving his point. “The wind carried it over and it touched my head.”
“Right. The wind.” You roll your eyes. “You’re like, fifteen feet tall, only God can see the top of your head.”
“That doesn’t mean any–”
“Hush, I’m thinking. Quiet, human Burj Khalifa.” You hold your hand up. “Let’s see. The ghost knocks on furniture when we were downstairs. It shoves the bed and rolls a bottle around on the ground when we’re arguing and right when you’re leaving, it throws a piece of paper at you. What could it all mean?”
“I got it.” BUccky straightens up. “Holy shit, I think I know what it means.”
“What?” you ask, wonder and mystery. “What does it mean?”
“It means that my Uber’s here,” Bucky replies in the same tone and mystery. “You’re insane. I’m leaving. Bye.”
“Ugh, you’re such a loser. If I turn up dead, you’ll have been the last person to see me alive.”
“I’ll see you at home.” He shoves his hands into the pocket of his shorts before turning on his heel. 
“I do not have a home.” you say, reaching to grab the piece of paper he discarded and shoving it into your bag; 
“Okay, see you on the news, then.” He kicks the damn bottle out of the way before heading out the door. “I’ll make sure they use a real nice picture of you.”
“Bitch–” you begin, when something catches your attention
The bed creeks loudly, reflexes instantly sending him into fight or flight. 
Bucky turns to you to cuss you out again for the nth time that evening, but you’ve also got a look of confusion painted all over you. 
“Hold on,” you say strangely, voice thick with theorising, “I think I actually figured it out.”
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When Jason finally makes his way back to the house two hours later, his hair is littered with stray bits of confetti and his eyes are smudged with eyeliner. He’s got a smoothie cup full of glittery red liquid and a straw, and what looks like little bits of fruit floating around in there. 
“Looks like the gig was a rager,” you comment. 
“Nah this wasn’t from the gig. I got lost,” he dismisses, and then refuses to expand further. “Anyway, you kicked his ass, right?”
You look at Bucky, who is standing with his arms crossed over his chest, bitch face on full blast as he looks pissed in the corner.
“Your uncle– he decorated this house himself, right?” you prompt. 
“Yeah.” Jason says, taking a sip from his unidentified liquid. “He got a bunch of shit custom made.” 
“Right.” You nod. “And when you came in here, did you shift the furniture around?”
“Yeah, lol, it was mad ugly,” Jason divulges, taking one large last sip before dropping his cup onto the ground. “Mine’s way better.” 
“Have you considered that maybe… your uncle doesn’t like that?” you try gently, eyes following the cup as it clatters gracefully onto the ground. 
Bucky talks to himself under his breath, the same as when you told him that the only time spooky shit had happened was when he dropped bottle caps, shifted beds out of their original places, left behind bottles and other paper. But he doesn’t contradict you. 
“I see,” Jason says. “What’s wrong with moving furniture again?”
Bucky wonders how the guy made it to this age. “Maybe he just doesn’t like you moving his shit around. Not that there’s a ghost at all.” 
“Hmm,” he says, following along. “So I stop moving the bed and other stuff, and he’ll stop being such a bitch?”
“And maybe he doesn’t like you leaving trash around the place?” you eye the cup, completely understanding where the uncle was coming from. 
“Okay,” Jason says again. 
“So you’ll stop?” you proposition slowly.
He shrugs. “Nah, I like it better this way.”
“Jesus Christ,” Bucky exhales.
You hold back an audible groan. 
“You could, like, punch him to get him off my back. Like, all the way off my back,” the guy suggests instead. “Like, sucks for him that he’s dead, I guess, but it’s like, my house now.”
You stay quiet and wait. 
Sure enough, the cup from earlier bumps into his leg in silent fury.
He stares down at it, giving it a kick. It rolls away before rolling right back with malice. Bucky narrows his eyes at it, too tired at this point to even complain. 
“This house is weird, man,” Jason declares after fifteen rounds of kicking it and watching it roll back. 
“Look–” you sigh. “You could just stop littering, and he’ll stop messing with your layout.”
“And take out the trash more than once a month,” Bucky adds from under his breath. 
“Life’s all about compromises. You get his house for free and he gets a clean house to spend his afterlife in.”
“No such thing,” Bucky adds.
You send a glare his way.
“I see,” Jason contemplates, as if it’s the toughest decision on earth to pick up his crushed soda cans. “Yeah, okay.”
A second later, the cup finally stops trying to assault his now pink flip flops. and comes to a standstill. 
The both of you peer at him.
“What?” he asks. 
Your gaze drifts down.
It takes a very long second for it to click.
“Oh ‘Kay,” he says, bending over to pick it up and place it back on his table, looking at you for confirmation, to which you nod. 
It stays in its place. 
“Radical,” he says. 
No one says anything further. The bed doesn’t make a noise either. The air is almost dropping with awkwardness. 
You clear your throat. “Well, that concludes it then. Pleasure meeting ya.”
“You too.” Jason gives you a thumbs up, following it with a peace sign. 
“Bye,” Bucky says curtly, turning to walk out the room.
“Oh! Here’s our business card, in case you or anyone else you–”
Bucky spins you around by your shoulders and drags you out of the room with him. 
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On the way back, you sort through all the footage from the evening while Bucky drives the van back. 
Thankfully, it has been relatively quiet the entire time, except for the soft sounds of the radio and the buzz of the heater. Bucky tunes out for most of the ride, one hand on the wheel and the other propping up his head.  
“Huh,” you comment out of the blue. “That’s fun.”
“What?” he asks inattentively . 
“I guess his uncle really was hungry,” you consider. 
Bucky simply keeps quiet and waits for you to go on if you choose to.
“Piece of paper that he threw at you–”
“Piece of paper that the wind picked up,” even his entertaining of you has a limit, but he isn’t paying much attention. 
“It’s got letters on it,” you shove the sheet in front of his eyes, forcing him to swerve on the road in an instant. 
“I’m driving,” he hisses, shoving it aside swiftly. “Do you want us to die?” 
“Yeah, yeah, but look at it,” you insist, only to hold it close to his face again. “Does this mean anything to you? It did hit you across the head.”
He refuses to believe you at first, but the second he glances at it, it’s unmistakable.
‘PB&J’ written messily across the page, small letters, lines jagged like someone was struggling to write with their non-dominant hand.
“That’s nothing,” he dismisses quietly, “He’s a college kid. They live on that shit.” 
“Or maybe someone in the afterworld really misses their PB&J,” you hum. 
Bucky doesn't answer, because the alternative is worse. The alternative means something is going very, very wrong. 
 But you don't seem to pay him any heed, going right back to sorting through footage. 
It’s probably why you don’t notice that his one handed grip on the steering wheel gets tighter, and his face quietly drains of colour. 
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joecoolburrow · 3 months ago
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Serendipity ~Joe Burrow x reader
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Summary: When your romantic bye week trip gets canceled, you find a way to cheer Joe up
fluff, emotional hurt/comfort
Warning: fire
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You were holding up two of your favorite dresses in the mirror, trying to decide between them, when the timer went off. You hurried to the kitchen, the aroma of your finished product filling the air.
Carefully, you pulled your steaming hot pumpkin pie out of the oven. You set it on the counter and admired it. Pumpkin pie was one of Joe’s favorites. You got Robin to give you the recipe she uses every thanksgiving so you could surprise Joe with a sweet treat and a romantic dinner. He needed it after your other romantic plan fell through.
It was the Bengals bye week. Joe planned a romantic trip for the two of you to go to the mountains out West in a secluded log cabin. It was a dream trip for you: beautiful scenery, mountains, lakes, a chance to connect with each other in the privacy of the woods, and the romance the giant fireplace and hearth rug promised. You and Joe looked forward to this for months.
The weather had other plans. A blizzard coming across the Midwest had caused all flights to be canceled or delayed indefinitely.
Of course you were disappointed. But Joe was taking it really hard. When you got the news, he descended into a brooding blue mood and hadn’t resurfaced yet.
He spent the day working out with his trainer, leaving you early in the morning with only a cheek kiss as a goodbye. His texts throughout the day were one worded and you could feel his blasé.
So baking a delicious pumpkin pie, ordering his favorite dinner from his favorite restaurant in Cincinnati, and putting on a dress that never failed to make him go wide eyed was your plan to cheer him up.
You decorated the dining room with rose petals, lit two tall candles in the center of the table, and started a roaring fire in the fireplace. It gave your home the romantic ambiance you were hoping for. It wasn’t the cabin you two hoped for, but it was something.
Your phone vibrated with a text. It was Joe.
“Omw” was all it said.
You smiled, confident you were about to turn his mood around. You went back upstairs to put on your dress and do your hair.
When you heard Joe’s car pull up, you ran to the door to greet him. You brushed off your dress (an off the shoulder, blue velvet number with a slit on the side) and tried to look casually sexy.
Joe walked in still wearing his sunglasses. He kicked his shoes off without looking up, not noticing you yet.
“Hi babe!” You greeted with a sultry smile.
Joe’s cold demeanor melted a little at the sight of you.
“Hey,” he said, taking off the shades and looking you up and down. “What have you been up to?”
“You’ll see.”
You took his hand and pulled him to the dining room with a devilish grin.
“I hope you’re hungry,” you told Joe as you presented the food and pie on the table. “I’ve got a four course meal for you.”
Joe eyed the food with a crocked eyebrow.
“Appetizer, main course, dessert….” He counted. “What’s course four?”
You winked at him. The boyish laughter told him you understood. Despite the aura of a Casanova, Joe was a little shy when it came to flirting and you loved it!
“So you think you’re hungry enough for all of this?” You teased.
“Starving.” Jos answered.
He pulled out a chair and guided you into it with a hand on your waist. You loved when he got all gentlemanly.
He gave you the brightest smile and you felt your heart soar. You were so glad you brought that smile back to his face.
“You look amazing. And this food looks amazing.” Joe said.
“I was hoping you’d like it.”
“I love it.” He said appreciatively. His voice lowered to a sweet whisper as he leaned in to kiss your shoulder tenderly. “I love you.”
Joe grabbed the champagne and poured you each a glass.
“Cheers!” You offered.
“To what?”
You thought for a second before you settled on, “Serendipity.”
“To serendipity!” Joe’s eyes locked with yours as your glasses clanked.
Holding Joe’s gaze was more intoxicating than the champagne. Those pools of crystal blue you could sink and drown in happily. You were imagining all the things you wanted him to do to you while he looked at you with those eyes.
You didn’t look where you were setting your glass down and accidentally knocked over one of the candles. It fell onto the table runner, which caught fire.
“Oh shit!” You shrieked.
Joe jumped up and pulled you over to the other side of the room. He ran off as you watched the orange flame spreading across the table. Joe returned armed with a fire extinguisher. He sprayed it at the tiny blaze, which disappeared under a cloud of white foam.
The fire was not the only thing smothered by the foam. The food and the pumpkin pie you’d spent hours making were covered in white dust.
You looked at the ruins of your romantic surprise in shock, before the blare of the smoke detector caused you to burst into tears.
“What’s wrong?” Joe put his arms around you. “Are you hurt?”
“No.” You cried over the beeping.
Joe looked uneasy. “Let me get that thing to shut up.” He stepped away.
Not wanting to look at the disaster anymore, you sulked over to the living room and sat down on the couch. You started crying a little harder.
Joe came to sit beside you a few moments later. His strong hand on your back comforting you.
“I’m sorry about the food.” Joe sighed.
Through your tears, you looked at him. He seemed more disappointed than when your trip was cancelled.
You sobbed into his chest.
“Hey, it’s alright. I can get us some takeout.” He reassured you.
“No. It’s not about the food.” You cried. “This was supposed to be a special surprise for you.”
You wiped your tears and reached for a tissue. You couldn’t bring yourself to meet Joe’s eyes now.
“I’m sorry.” You whimpered.
“Sorry?” He questioned. “For what?”
“Now you’ve had two disappointments, two days in a row. I wanted to make you happy after our trip got cancelled but I’ve made things even worse.”
Joe laughed.
You looked up at him puzzled. He kissed you softly.
“Baby, I don’t care about a trip or a special dinner.” He whispered.
“But you seemed so disappointed. I just wanted to make you happy.”
“Y/n.” He held your face in his palms. “I am happy. Ever since we’ve been together, I’ve been happier than ever.”
“I know, Joe, it’s just that yesterday and today you’ve seemed so sad that we couldn’t stay at the cabin like we planned. I know how much you were looking forward to getting away from the stress of the season and having alone time together. Seeing you look so sad broke my heart.”
“I was only sad because I thought you were really disappointed.”
A smile graced your teary face. “Really?”
“Yeah.” He said as if it were obvious. “I don’t care where we are. I only booked the cabin because I know you like the mountains. I hate the woods. I don’t like hiking, or bugs, or being so far from civilization. But I thought you’d want to go.”
Now that you thought about it, Joe was scared of bugs and movies that take place in cabins in the woods.
“I’m happy to hang out at home all week, but I thought you’d be bored.” Joe continued. “That’s why I planned the trip. Today I was down because I felt like I’d left you disappointed. What I want more than anything is for you to be happy.”
You threw your arms around his shoulders and a leg on top of his.
“Oh babe, I’m always happy when I’m with you.”
“Then let’s spend the bye week right here on this couch.” He suggested.
You started to laugh but we’re cut off by Joe’s lips on yours. The kiss deepened. You felt his fingertips dancing around the hem of your dress.
“You know,” you whispered against his lips, “the final course is still available.”
“Good. Because I’m still hungry.”
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joelsmorgan · 2 months ago
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ఇ - ellie williams masterlist.
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✦ one shots.
extra credit | enemies to lovers - by @/violetszn
just friends? | friends to lovers - by @/madewithsilk
like it's our last | brother’s best friend to lovers-ish - by @/desertteagles
mismatched | friends to ? - by @/applejusue
after midnight | established relationship - by @/marscardigan
earned it | cheating, pwop - by @/elswhore
couldn't fight to save your life (but you look so cool) | schoolmates to lovers-ish, two idiots in love - by @/angelsknifeprty
you matched with ellie! | strangers to lovers-ish, semi smau - by @/bloodstainedsapphic
where it's safe | established relationship - by @/sadiesdoll
muse of mine | established relationship - by @/doiliedaze
candy crush | strangers to lovers - by @/s-4pphics
love at first sight fight | enemies to lovers - by @/loonyforyouonly
crimson days | established relationship - by @/elliespassengerprincess
ink and heat | strangers to ?, pwop - by @/elswhore
bottom bitch | strangers to ?, pwop - by @/orphicsun
keep 'em entertained | strangers to lovers - by @/elswhore
naked in her journal | bffs to lovers - by @/onlyheluvsme
double pleasure | established relationship, pwop - by @/elliesanqel
the romancer (talk) | pwop - by @/venuswiiine
obsessed | pwop - by @/elliesanqel
growing pains | childhood friends to strangers to lovers - by @/ruleofheart
outlawed romance | friends to lovers, cheating - by @/slutt4ellie
✦ series.
but i'm a cheerleader | enemies to lovers, smau - by @/marscardigan don't be a dick - chapter one. delusion is a disease - chapter two. "no" is a full sentence - chapter three. did you at least record it? - chapter four. which one - chapter five. too late - chapter six. typical ellie behaviour - chapter seven. regionals - chapter eight.
extras: headcannons.
apple cider | best friends to lovers - by @/cheriedivine chapter one. chapter two.
don't run away from me | strangers to lovers - by @/mediocre-writing prologue. chapter one.
farmhand | strangers to lovers - by @/applejusue farmhand - chapter one. barn dance - chapter two. blizzard - chapter three.
thirsty connection | strangers to lovers, smau - by @/breathinlove prologue. chapter one. chapter two. chapter three. chapter four. chapter five. chapter six. chapter seven. chapter eight.
call me if you get lost | semi-strangers to lovers, smau - by @/cowgirlcherrie prologue. wusyaname - chapter one. corso - chapter two. lemonhead - chapter three. rise! - chapter four. runitup - chapter five. sweet, i thought you wanted to dance - chapter six. boyfriend, girlfriend - chapter seven. sorry not sorry - chapter eight.
hot & heavy | bffs to strangers/enemies to lovers - by @/crushh-existz chapter one.
moving in | strangers to lovers, semi smau - by @/ moving in - part one. weeks of bliss - part two. - part three.
focus pull | strangers to lovers - by @/yunaversalluv prologue. through the lense - chapter one. better mean it - chapter two. static - chapter three. captured moments - chapter four.
✦ random.
nsfw twitter links. one (included too: abby). two (included too: joel, abby, jesse, dina) three (included too: joel, abby). four (included too: abby). five (included too: joel, abby, jesse, dina). six (included too: abby). seven (included too: abby). eight.
total count: 29 (79 links).
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more on the last of us | joel miller, part one | joel miller, part three | joel miller, part three | abby anderson | jesse
my masterlist of recommendations.
i’m going to keep updating this list as i read more!
last update: 8/05/2025
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ithebookhoarder · 2 years ago
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(BAU Headcanons) Spending a day off with your S.O.
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Aaron Hotchner
Ok. So. First of all... Aaron's casual wardrobe is sinful and I feel like I need to mention it when talking about days off. After all, he's not going to turn down the excuse not to wear a shirt and tie, knowing jeans and his usual polo shirts are better suited to both relaxing and possibly chasing after Jack.
If you two ever got a rare day off then he would do his best to make you breakfast in bed, knowing that having an excuse to stay in bed is a luxury.
If Jack is with you, and not at Jessica's, then you know Jack would be right next to him in the kitchen, begging to help. I mean, if you watch Bluey, picture the episode where Bingo is trying to make that omelette for Bandit on his birthday... that's basically the vibe here.
Hotch wouldn’t try to force you out of the house if you didn’t want to go, as he’s perfectly happy to stay in and play with you and Jack. After all, you have the most recent lego set, which you bought him for his birthday, to finish building.
"You up for that buddy? Six hands are better than four, after all."
Or, if you don't have the energy or patience, then you three can curl up on the sofa together and watch movies and the backlog of tv shows you’ve missed out on whilst you’ve been away working. 
Fun Fact: Aaron would rather die than admit to the rest of the BAU that you got him hooked on reality shows like The Real Housewives of Beverley Hills or Below Deck -but he is. He finds them fascinating case studies in human behaviour... or that's his excuse anyway when you call him out on it.
However, if you do want to actually leave the house and get outside then he’d be pretty relaxed about whatever it is you wanted to do, as long as you could all do it together. 
He'd also love it if you both got the chance to go for a run, enjoying the rare opportunity to race you through the nearby park. You can just soak in the sunshine and watch the other people as they make their way through the world, before grabbing a coffee on your way home.  
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David Rossi 
Rossi is a man who knows the value of creature comforts, as we've seen repeatedly in the show. You know this man enjoys having time off to indulge himself - and you too.
As soon as he knows he has the day off, you can bet he's driving you to the local farmer's market to buy all the ingredients needed for a home cooked feast. 
Despite promising to be there only an hour, you know he's the kind of person who would talk to each and every vendor, learning all their names and asking after their families as if they've been friends since birth.
You'd end up spending almost the entire morning - and part of the afternoon - shopping, sampling various treats and wares, and buying several bag's worth, before you're finally able to drag him back to the car.
As he's cooking, Rossi would definitely play his favourite records. He alternates between crooning along and telling you tidbits about the artists - and the many crazy memories he has about these records.
"Did I ever tell you about the time I first heard this? We were in this tiny little motel, in the middle of a horrific blizzard, and several whiskeys in..."
It's hard not to get distracted, drawn in as he pulls you close and starts dancing about the kitchen. You'd get so distracted that you almost let dinner spoil and only remember it's even there when you start to smell something burning.
"Ah! Merda!"
After dinner you know you'd end up outside on his patio, enjoying the view as the sun goes down, over a cocktail of his choosing.
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Derek Morgan
You know this eager beaver would not be spending a day off with you doing nothing or letting the day ‘go to waste’.
He’d be at your doorstep bright and early, looking unfairly energetic for someone who has been running on minimal sleep all week.
Thankfully, he brings coffee and breakfast with him which is his way of bribing you to get your ass up and out with him. 
As for the day itself, he’d either have the day planned to a ’t’ or he’d have nothing planned at all. 
“Relax, sweetness, we’re letting the day take us where it may. Enjoy the ride.” 
He'd love having a reason to take you to whatever property he's renovating, hoping to share his vision for the place and getting your opinion on it all.
He'd even let you have a swing or two with a sledgehammer if there's a dry-wall that needs taking down. It's a great stress-reliever for you both, and there's nothing like hammering along in the time to beat of whatever playlist he's chosen.
He'd also order you a pizza, or whatever take-out you fancied, as payment for all your hard work.
You know he'd also been keen to help you wash up later, running you both a hot bath to soak in as you actually have the time to enjoy it.
And just between us - he knows Hotch and Rossi would have his guts his they found out - but he may or may not have left your cellphones on the bed-side table just to ensure you get an hour of peace, undisturbed...
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Emily Prentiss
Ok. So. Emily loves having a day off almost as much as she enjoys working.
She doesn't require much in the way of plans. In fact, her ideal day off from the BAU involves you, a crossword puzzle, and your usual table by the window at the coffee shop around the corner.
It's right by the window, so you can bathe in the sun whilst you nurse your way through coffee after coffee.
The whole place reminds her of one similar that she spent her time in, in Paris. Just like then, she loves reading books, and completing the daily crossword with your help.
"Damn it. This is what time in Europe gets you - I forgot there's no 'u' in color. No wonder it wasn't fitting."
Emily also has a game she likes to play, watching the people around you, guessing what their stories are and imaging outlandish profiles for them all. It's a privilege to enjoy it when it's for entertainment and not out of a need to be aware of your surroundings or an ongoing threat assessment. 
Afterwards, you'd go for a stroll around the park and most likely visit the shops you rarely get a chance to.
You both spend ages going through the racks and modelling outfits for one another, knowing you need some new things to fill out your wardrobes other than work-attire. It's a like private treat for yourselves.
Once you're home again, I feel Emily would want to cook and would do a pretty good job when she has the energy. However, she is not above ordering takeout when you both can’t be bothered. 
After all, it gives you both more time together to lie in bed, with Sergio curled up between you, purring loudly as you take it in turns to pet him.
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JJ
Depending on when you two got together (before or after Will), she would love to have a chance for the both of you to spend the day with Henry.
You're her family and the most important thing in the world to her. It's why she can't stop beaming as you spend the afternoon at the park together, running rings around the place and clambering all over the playground.
"I swear this kid is faster than most of the Unsubs we chase - and more sneaky too."
JJ would bring all your favourite snacks with her so you can all lie out on the grass and feast once your energy levels drop. She doesn't even mention the sugar content or how many E-numbers there are. You all deserve a treat, Henry included, so she's willing to put her 'mom hat' aside for a minute.
I feel like she'd also try and put her mom hat aside so you two can have some time without a child in tow. She'd try and make a last minute arrangement to get a sitter so you two can have some 'adult' time.
This normally involves making a reservation at your favourite restaurant, and insisting on you both dressing fancy just for the fun of it.
After all, you never get to play at being grown ups and just enjoy wearing something because it looks nice and not because you can run around in the field in it.
"I've had these heels for years and I swear I've only got to wear them like three times - and this skirt! I love this skirt."
Once you get to the restaurant, you spend hours just talking, drinking, and eating before taking a stroll on the way home.
You then curl up in bed and fall asleep to the sound of the TV playing your favourite movies, safe and warm in each other's arms.
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Penelope Garcia 
This girl is the queen of relaxing. If she doesn’t have to be awake before noon then you can bet your ass she’ll be tucked up and toasty till 12:01. 
Once she's awake, however, she's a flustered mess, struggling to pick between her various plans for your time off together. There's just so much she wants to do with you and never enough time.
"What? I'm the queen of fun and I just want to make sure we make the most of our time together, sugar plum. I can't help it. I'm excited to have a day just you and me, not that I don't love the others too. I do, but you know, just having it be us is rare -"
You stop her rambling with a kiss, which of course makes her melt.
I feel like Penelope would always try and spend part of the day with you in the kitchen, baking a new recipe to take to work for the others to try.
She'd also love spending the day on the sofa with you, watching either a Rom-com or a Sci-fi marathon (depending on your moods).
Once the decision has been made, she'd insist on gathering supplies - AKA: onesies, takeout and face masks.
"It's the holy trinity of self-care," she explains, holding up your choices. "Now, do you want the tea-tree or coconut face mask?"
However, if you do feel like getting out of the house, then Penelope would take you on theatre trips - which are booked last minute but with amazing seats (courtesy of Penelope’s connections and slightly unorthodox know-how).
The others are still jealous after finding out she got you tickets to Hamilton, front row, with the original cast.
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Dr Spencer Reid
You know Spencer is the kind of person that has a list of things the size of his arm that he’d love to do with you on a rare day off. 
You’d probably have to negotiate with him to figure out which ones you could reasonably do in just 24 hours - and you try to find a balance between appeasing his interests and yours. 
For example, you don’t mind sitting through a Russian movie festival if afterwards he agrees to let you wander around your favourite bookshop and spend as long as you want exploring the shelves - without him critiquing or spoiling the endings before you even have a chance to read the blurb. 
If you also happened to let it slip that you'd never watched every single episode of Doctor Who that's ever been made, then you know your future days off will be spent marathoning on the couch. 
"I'm just saying that he's underrated as the Doctor as arguably the narratives of his episodes are far better developed and reflect the point of the show, which is that the Doctor isn't perfect but rather a time-travelling refugee who acts as a healer, counsellor, and protector of the universe. It's why he calls himself 'The Doctor' ..."
He always looks so adorable when he gets excited about something he loves. It's hard not to fall in love with him all over again.
Apart from watching TV, you both also love spending days off on that couch, curled up together, reading your way through the stack of books you both had in your never ending ‘TBR’ pile. 
Spencer would love listening to you discuss whatever you're reading, doing his best to memorise the characters, plots, and your thoughts on both. It's the least he can do when you listen so patiently every time he starts rambling on about whatever his latest hyper-fixation is.
"Can I... can I borrow that when you're finished? I'm now curious - just don't tell the others, ok?"
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Masterlist
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writing-mlm · 1 year ago
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jason todd x reader please 😔
The ShopKeep and the Hobbyist [J.T]
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Summary: Jason's been going to this bookstore for long enough that he's developed a bit of a reputation with them. If only the cute cashier would understand he's trying to flirt but as fate would have it, one knife chase later, and maybe they're more than worker and costumer. Pairing: Jason Todd x Male!Reader WC: 7.3k TW: use of fag but its a quote
Jason traveled out of Gotham once a week, always on a Sunday, always to the same location for three entire hours. Everyone knew that Sunday from noon to four— accounting for traffic and eating out that might happen, that Jason was absolutely unavailable. Unless you physically went to track him down. 
But that’s yet to happen. 
It’s Sunday and Jason arrived at the normal spot earlier than usual. Traffic was amazing, no accidents on the way out of Gotham, and the highway was thankfully void. He parked his bike in his normal spot, right in front of the store, and lifted the visor to the helmet before heading inside. 
The Open Book had always welcomed Jason, even when the shop was closed in the middle of a blizzard. And he helped where he could (Wayne Enterprises always made a large monthly donation to the shop and for some odd reason, someone had gifted the shop a fake bird that is able to stop any thefts(odd)). 
“New shipment came in today,” The store owner's grandson greeted him, leaning across the counter to grab at the basket of free candies the shop offered. “Snagged this vintage-looking book collection for ya.” Ever since word that a Wayne kid visits the bookshop, sales have grown so it’s hard keeping certain items in stock. Especially the fancy-looking titles. 
“Do tell,” He grabs a bite-sized chocolate and rips the packet open while you set your lollipop wrapper into your apron pocket before ducking under the counter. 
   “Shits heavy,” You grunt, slamming the box onto the table and read the label. “Uhh, ‘William Shakespeare, Comedies, Histories, & Tragedies. Published According to the True Originall Copies, 1623.’ Original is spelled wrong, though,” You look up at him and pause at his wide-eyed, clearly shocked expression. 
“Shakespeare fan?” You ask, opening the flap to the box. “There’s a bunch of them in here. I think this was someone’s collection.” 
“Do you know how much it’s worth?” Jason laughs, peering into the box, and then whistles. 
   “Probably a hundred at the most,” You shrug and he slaps the table with a loud Ha! that makes you look at him, crossing his arms. “Fifty?” 
“Try nine mil,” The lollipop falls from your mouth as you look from Jason to the book collection. 
   “For all of it?” You gape. 
   “For the top book,” He corrects. “Thank god you snagged it before someone who cared did.” 
“Yeah,” You sigh, staring at the book and taking in all of the details. That’s more than you’ll ever make in a lifetime. “What should I do? Do you want it?”
“Want it like I need air,” He admits, handing you another lollipop. “But you should probably auction it, get a stack and whatnot.”
“Grams would get pissed,” You shake your head and slide the box towards him. “Believes books should be read, not stored as an artifact, yknow? Think she marked this box as a hundred, want me to ring it up?” He looks at you and takes his helmet off so you can fully see his are you stupid? look that’s plastered on his face. 
   “(Y/n),” Jason slides the box back. “This is worth more than every single book in here!” And as much as he pained Jason to say that, he knew it was true. With over two entire floors filled with books, they were but a drop in the bucket compared to that singular box sitting between the two of you. 
“It’s just paper and ink,” You shrug, staring at the box. “Besides, she’d get mad if I did and I can’t exactly hide nine million dollars!” Sighing through his nose, he agrees to buy the box and has you set it aside while he goes about shopping.
“You’re staring,” Someone tells him as they walk past and his head spins around to see who it is. It’s one of your younger sisters, around twelve or thirteen, if he remembers right. 
   “Wasn’t,” He tells her and picks up a book. “I was looking at this book!” She turns back to him and raises her eyebrows at the title before grinning. 
   “Didn’t take you as an Ice Breaker fan,” She chides and walks away while Jason stares at the book. It could’ve been basically any other book. Putting the book back, Jason returns to his actual book shopping which only takes ten or so minutes. He knows his bag is going to be heavy with the Shakeseapre books so he can’t get too many other books this week. 
“Light load,” You comment, scanning the books. “You bought this one a month ago, too.” You note, holding off on scanning A Good Girls Guide to Murder. 
   “My sister wants to read it,” He explains, flipping through the pages. “And she likes to dogear pages.” Cringing, you scan the book and read him his total before leaning against the counter. It’s a large enough counter that most of your body can rest against it while he pays while you use your phone to order some lunch. 
“That place sucks ass,” Jason comments as he’s putting his card away. You roll your eyes and look up at him. 
   “I’m hungry as shit and there’s no good places around within a reasonable price, this place has decent grilled cheeses.” You justify and he finishes paying. 
   “What would you have gotten?” He muses, leaning against the counter so the two of you are face to face. Staring at the sad picture of a grilled cheese you huff. 
“Five guys,” You admit, looking back at him. He nods, silently urging you to continue while looking you up and down, his eyes slowly moving. You also don’t notice it or the small smile on his face when you don’t move away from him. “Strawberry milkshake and grilled cheeseburger.” You finished. 
   “No fries?” He asks and you shake your head. 
   “I don’t really eat fries from there,” You admit, fiddling with the skin around your nails. 
“Sounds good,” He tilts his head a bit, grinning so his canines are showing. He watches as your eyes dip once and then twice to his lips before they finally stay on his face. 
   “It’s fucking good. An arm and a leg, but still,” Standing up, you groan and stretch. He stands up too and puts on his helmet. You watch and wait for him to dip his head down before giving his head two pats. For good luck, of course. 
When he leaves, you return to your seat and look over the shop. There’s a dozen or so people inside, some people who are clearly not there for books as they’re recording those random interviews with the tiny microphones and such. You should really stop them, maybe put up a sign or something. But they’re leaving anyway. So it doesn’t really matter. 
“Did you kiss?” Your sister asks, walking over to grab one of the candies.  
   “Girl,” Your face scrunches and she tosses the wrapper at you but it falls short. 
    “Just saying, seemed awfully close.” She shrugs. “I would’ve made a move on him a long time ago.”
“You’re ten.” Huffing, she huffs back and puts her hands on her hips. 
   “Nineteen,” She corrects. Making a talking motion with your hand, she smacks it away and throws a fireball candy at you. “That’s why you’re forty and a virgin!” 
“Neither of those are true,” You stress, tossing the candy back into the bowl. “And didn’t you just get dumped by some loser who said he’d absolutely eat a turducken covered in chocolate?” She rolls her eyes and walks behind the counter to sign into work. 
   “I dumped him,” She corrects. “Unlike your failed relationship with the guy who wanted you to pretend to be a woman.” 
“Too low,” You sigh, shaking your head. “Too low.” 
With your lunch break in full swing, you’re upstairs in the break room watching some crappy straight-to-DVD movie your father had bought years back while eating the very sad grilled cheese when the door opens. Half expecting it to be another family member, you don’t look away from the TV and give a small hey but when no one replies you look towards the door and hum surprised to see Jason there. Even more so on who let him in 
“Missed me?” You grin, watching as he closes the door behind him and rolls his eyes. 
   “Little delivery,” He corrects and motions for you to turn back to the movie. You do, albeit a bit hesitant to do so, but you try not to look back when you hear him getting closer. “Close your eyes, too.” He adds when you look as far back as you can without turning your head. Groaning, you cover your eyes with your hand just to prove you’re not peeking and hear him set something down on the spot next to you. 
“See you next week!” He pats your back before snatching the half-eaten grilled cheese from your hand and you take it as a sign you can open your eyes. You’re not even upset he’s eating your lunch, it wasn’t good. Looking at what he had set down, you see the familiar white and red bag and crack a smile. 
   “You got me Five Guys?” Your head whips to the door but it’s already shutting and you can hear his heavy boots quickly running down the stairs. Turning back to the bag, you pull your phone out and scroll to find his contact. 
Thank you
we feast tonight 
The two of you don’t text much, mostly if he had forgotten something in the shop or given him a heads-up that the bookstore was closed for the day. Hell, his contact name is still Jason (bookstore fav). But he reads it immediately and thumbs up the last text. 
This grilled cheese sucks by the way
It feels like plastic
Probably is lol
While Jason is very much a regular at the shop, you don’t really remember when he first started to frequent the shop. Just that one Sunday, you had seen the time and noticed he was late to the shop. He’d come in almost three hours later than he normally did and watched as you sighed, tossing his favorite candy at him before ushering him to the counter. He listened as you told him that next time he is late he needs to text or you’d send out an amber alert yourself. 
He truly hadn’t thought anyone had noticed the change in his routine. Especially someone he only saw once a week. It had been a really shitty night for him and an ever-shitter morning, feeling like a ghost wandering through Gotham, living in a life he never should have. 
He apologized with a grin and gave you his number. He also spent a little extra time in the shop, loving the familiar smell around him. He loves the bookstore more than he loves his guns, more than he loves most things really. It’s the only normal thing in his life and truly, Jason doesn’t know what he’d do without it. Without you, honestly. He’s only ever there when you are and a place is only as welcoming as the people inhabiting it. 
Which is why he’d picked up the 2 am phone call so fast. 
“Jason?” You whisper shout into the phone. He can hear some harsh wind and some distant shouts in the background, but it took much less than that for him to abandon his patrol and start over to you. “Shit— I’m sorry but I don’t know who else to call.” You add, the clarity hitting that during an emergency you called the guy who lived nearly half an hour away on a good day.
   “It’s okay, doll,” He replies and you dare to glance behind you. Maybe they’d given up by now, but no. “What’s wrong?” He asks as you round a corner. “Where are you?” He quickly adds and you glance at the road signs. 
“Uhh, heading towards Second Ave and Belcher Street. My friend's boyfriend thinks she’s cheating with me and him and his friends are chasing me,” You explain.
   “Guns?” He asks, already leaving the Gotham border. 
   “No,” You huff, the strain of running heavy on your chest. “Just knives.” 
That’s good, he tells himself. Distance is what you should be focusing on. But he knows that the regular person cannot run for nearly as long as he can and realistically, you’re bound to get tired much sooner than multiple people. 
   “Is there a crowd nearby?” You can hear some muffling to his voice but that’s honestly the least of your issues. “Maybe a club or hospital.” He adds when you don’t respond fast enough. 
   “No,” You strain. “Just apartments and shit. God, fuck! Do you think I should climb the fire escape?” There are several ahead of you, and one of them is low enough for you to grab. 
“Can you?” He asks. 
   “Yeah— yeah,” Jumping up, you pull yourself up and start climbing up to the roof. “Shit, I’m really high up,” You pant, daring to look over the edge and see the guys climbing up. “They’re climbing up,” You tell him, quickly backing away and trying to find an exit. What type of roof doesn’t have a fucking exit? 
“I’ve seen people jump from roof to roof,” You're thinking out loud at this point, trying to find some type of solution to your stupid idea. “Can’t be that hard, right?”
“Depends on the distance,” He truthfully tells you and you look at the two nearby roofs. 
   “Definitely too far. I’m fucked.” 
“Still on Second and Blecher?” He asks and you mutter a yeah when you see them reach the roof. 
   “They’re up,” You mumble. “I could jump and live, yeah?” Glancing to your left, you see a dumpster and reassure yourself that you’d be fine. 
   “Do you think you can come back down the fire escape?” He asks. “Is there one behind the building?” Looking behind you, you let out a loud sigh.    
“Yeah— yes, heading down.” Rushing down as fast as you can, you reach the ground as they’re in the middle and run back into the main road. 
“Head back down the way you came,” Jason instructs. He’s only five minutes away at this point, maybe three if he tries hard enough. He just needs you to buy five more minutes. 
   “Okay,” 
Running for what felt like an eternity, your legs are burning and your chest is tight. Maybe that one time you lied during your physical exam was coming back to bite you. 
But they’re still chasing you and Jason is still guiding you. You’re sure you’re about to pass out when a motorcycle drifts in front of you. 
“Red Hood?” You gape, panting. The fuck? 
   “Come on,” You hear him and Jason say. You’ll worry about that once you’re away from those absolute track-and-field freaks chasing you. Getting on the motorcycle, he holds your thigh with one hand before pulling off. 
The ride is silent as you’re catching your breath and just making sure you’re okay in general. Aside from the insane burn in your calves, you’re fine. The ride does a lot to calm you down, by the time he reaches the shop your head is pressed to his back and you’re holding him not as tight as you were before. 
“I don’t know your address,” He admits and you laugh into his back. After all that happened it’s a little humorous that your biggest issue is Jason getting your address. You give it to him and it takes him a second but he has the route mapped out before he pulls back onto the street. 
“I’m staying the night.” He tells you as you get off of the bike. You don’t protest, not in the slightest. You’re far too tired to do so anyway. Instead, you wave him over and head upstairs. He tries to hide his helmet from the camera view but you tell him they don’t work. 
“This guy got robbed two days ago; whole building found out the cameras are fake,” You explain while leaning against the elevator wall.
   “And you feel safe?” He incredulously asks, looking you over. Even buildings in Gotham have working cameras.  
    “I have a gun,” You shrug while he looks at you with more of an analyzing gaze, a little surprised you’d have a gun. “And no valuables. My electronics are all secondhand for that exact reason.”
“So, steal the couch?” He jokes. 
   “If it can fit through the door, it’s yours!” Patting his arm, you exit the elevator and fish out your keys. Thankfully you hadn’t dropped them during the chase. 
“What happened?” He asks as soon as you close and double lock the door. Looking at him, you drop your phone and keys onto the kitchen island before heading back to the door. 
   “My friend, Gina,” You start with a sigh, kicking your shoes off. “She used to be my beard in high school. But we never officially broke up, I guess because she posted a story saying happy six-year anniversary. With a bunch of pictures of us together. Her boyfriend saw and he’s always been…” Rolling your hand, you open your closet and grab a new outfit. “He thinks I’m lying ‘bout being gay. Because I’m too… I dunno what he thinks. But he says I don’t look gay and he’s never seen me with a guy before.” You explain with a huff. “Not my fault I’ve been single for two years, y'know. I got school and work and whatever!” Slamming the closet shut, you sigh and apologize. 
“I’m gonna take a shower, feel free to snoop and prod. And take the boots off, I just moped.” 
“Course,” He doesn’t move an inch as he unties his boots and walks to the shoe rack to set them down. You thank him and head into the bathroom. 
“If you gotta piss or shit, go ahead. I got a curtain and a strong scent blaster plugged in.” You tell him at the doorway to the bathroom. 
  “Noted.” He laughs but it drops once the door closes. 
He finds himself making sure the windows are locked and the curtains are properly drawn. He grabs his phone and saves your address into his personal map before he goes to check to see what type of security measures you have. And there’s not many, just a gun that’s badly hidden in your bedside table and the extra lock on the door. 
But there’s not much to the apartment, the decor is extremely minimal but he remembers you talking about saving to buy a house in the countryside. Or at least outside of a city. Own land and all that. 
He can’t decide if that’s good or not, there’s nothing to steal for sure, but it’s also really sad. There’s no personal touch to your apartment, it reminds him of one of his safe houses. 
He settles himself into the couch once he’s checked over everything, listening to the sounds of the shower and eventually, he hears the shower turn off. 
When you return to the living room in a pair of shorts, you’re a little surprised that Jason is still there. 
“Bruce Wayne as Batman makes a lotta sense,” Opening the fridge, you pull out two water bottles before setting them on the counter. 
“(Y/n),” Jason stops that conversation. “You should file a police report.”
“Fuck is that gonna do?” You huff, closing the fridge and opening the freezer to grab a popsicle. “Gina will hate me, cops will just forget to file it, and then I get harassed.” 
“They tried to kill you,” He stresses, blocking you from moving away from the fridge. You stare at him, a little upset that he’s caring so much. You feel bad for even calling him and sending him out of his way. And now he’s staying for who knows how long. Not to mention now you know his biggest secret— a family secret at that, one that you can tell one person, and suddenly the whole world knows. 
   “Happens every day,” You shrug but honestly, yeah, that shit scared you. His face drops and he snatches the popsicle from your hand before tossing it on the counter to your left. 
“No. Not to you. Not to most people. So what if Gina hates you afterward? Do you want a friend that’s known you since high school who would rather side with her crazy boyfriend?” 
“Of course not!” You groan. “But it’s Gina. She’s always been there and— and this is a one-time thing,”
“You sound ridiculous,” He tells you as he walks out of the small kitchen and into the living room. “Trying to kill someone isn’t a fucking one-off. It’s a crime, a legit crime. Has Gina even checked if you’re okay?” He points to the phone that’s still on the counter; the same phone he knows for a fact hasn’t buzzed once. 
   “No.” There's no need to check your phone, you already know there’s nothing from her. She’d never text you first. He nods as if to say there’s your answer. 
“Look, Jason. It was scary as fuck,” You admit. “But I’m good. And I thank you, but you should go home. I just…” Looking off to the wall. “I don’t know why I called you, I feel like shit for dragging you away from your home.”
“I was spending my night watching Harley and Ivy dry hump in front of a newly exploded power plant. You didn’t take me away from shit.” He blinks before heading to the couch. “Besides, it’s too late to drive back. I’m beat,”
“You’re lying,” You deadpan, tossing a water bottle between your hands. 
   “Am I?” He fake yawns, leaning back on the couch. “Can I get a blanket?” Clearly, he’s not going to leave, and it would be bad as a host to not make him comfortable. Asshole. 
   “Fine,” He grins as you walk away. 
“Oh and Jason, Gram’s told me about the payment plan you set up. Taking advantage of a woman who can’t speak English is rude. She thinks you’re paying five dollars a week for some back dues you owe.” It was actually five hundred thousand dollars a week, which was absurd but hey, if he insists. 
   “It’s just nine million,” He calls back. “Not even my money and B won’t notice it’s gone.” 
Just nine million, you repeat to yourself as you find a suitable blanket. It’s one of those thick fur blankets with a tiger on the front. 
“The couch is a pull-out, by the way.” Heading back into the living room, you tuck the blanket under your arm. “I’ve used it like once. It’s pretty comfortable unless you want the bed.” You add, setting the blanket on the edge of the couch. There’s no coffee table, you don’t see a reason for one. 
   “I can sleep on gravel, doll. I’m fine, thank you.” For some reason, his eyes are having a hard time staying on your face but you’re busy walking back into the kitchen to notice. 
“If you’re hungry make anything, I’m going grocery shopping in two days anyway.” Tossing the popsicle back into the freezer, you lean against the counter and watch him. It’s a little staring contest you have going on. His eyelashes are nice, real pretty boy-esque. 
The silence and tension in the apartment is broken by four rapid knocks to the front door followed by a worried: “(Y/n)?”
“Gina,” You tell Jason as he’s already off of the couch and halfway to the front door by the time you stand up straight. When you walk up behind him you pause, when did he have time to grab a gun? But he’s looking through the peephole before looking back to you and holding up two fingers. You almost laugh, this isn’t some military operation; just a… friend? at your door. 
“Please,” Gina says through the door. “We just— K wants to apologize,” Huffing, you look at Jason who’s standing behind the door, one hand on the top lock. He truly doesn’t want to unlock it, but it’s your apartment. Your call. 
   “Says who?” K snaps, his voice a lot more muffled than hers is. 
   “You’re going to fucking apologize.” She snaps right back. 
He raises an eyebrow and you nod to the door against your better judgment. He unlocks the door and stands in front of them, really standing over them with his damn height, the arm holding the gun hidden behind the door. You can basically hear Gina pause when she sees him. 
“Who are you?” Gina asks, looking him up and down. 
   “A friend.” He answers simply and then looks over to you. “Your friend is here.” 
“Thanks, Jay.” You smile and usher him into your bedroom with two quick glances. “Gina,” You greet a little harshly as you stand at the door. “Kyle.” You look at him for only a second. 
   “It’s K.” He corrects. 
“Can we come in?” She asks, stepping forward. “I explained everything to K and he’s sorry.” She looks back at him and he’s just standing there with this stupid look on his face. 
   “Is he?” You ask, looking at Kyle. “Because when he was screaming: I knew you weren’t a fag; I’m gonna cut your dick off; stop running bitch; and since you wanna pretend you’re a fag come and taste our dicks he just didn’t seem real sorry.” She cringes, he hadn’t said that part through the yelling they were doing. 
“I don’t wanna lose you,” She places a hand on the door, not that you were planning on closing it just yet. “Let us in and he’ll apologize.” Sighing, you look at her and frown. Between not even texting to see if you’re okay and then coming over with the audacity to think that a fucking apology would smooth things over, you were peeved. 
   “You’re losing one of us tonight. Him or me.” She takes a step back and frowns, her eyebrows knitting as your words settle in her. But at that moment, you knew the friendship was over. It shouldn’t ever take that long for an answer like that. 
“(Y/n), he’s sorry!” She almost shouts, shouting as if you had given her this impossible task. You want to reply, you want to yell, and to get into it then and there. But it’s no use. Your neighbors are sleeping, you’re tired, and far from a mood where you want to interact with them. As such, you close the door and put the locks back on. 
She shouts some things from the other side but you’re not listening as you enter your bedroom. 
Jason was standing right next to the door, startling you. If he hadn’t been so close you wouldn’t have seen him in the darkness. 
“Is that a requirement for vigilantes?” You ask, clutching your chest in an exaggeration. “Y’all are fucking spooky,” Tossing yourself onto your bed, you stare up at him. 
“She’s still at the door,” He ignores the comment on his family business once again. Instead, his eyes trained on your front door, watching and waiting to see what their next move is going to be. You hope for their sake it’s leaving because his hand is still on the safety of his gun. 
   “Not like they can get in,” You shrug, laying flat on your back. “I never give my key to anyone and it takes a full round of bullets to break the door.” 
“You know that how?” He asks, setting his gun down on the dresser. 
   “Last year my neighbor's crazy ex tried to break in but the door didn’t budge.” 
“Of course,” His head dips back into the bedroom, watching you. “Sleep, I’ll be in the living room.” 
“Okay,” Turning your head to look at him, you grin. “If you get nightmares, the bed is free.” Patting the empty space, Jason rolls his eyes with a grin and leaves the room. “Your gun?” You call after him, staring at the handgun still on your dresser. 
   “I have two more!” He calls back. 
“How the fuck?” But he doesn’t answer. 
The next morning you wake up to the sound of the front door closing. It stirs you, really, but you’re lucid enough to realize that hey, either Jason treated you like a one-night stand or someone had broken in. 
Sitting up in the bed, you collect yourself for a moment and grab his gun on your way out. While you’re surely not as keen as Jason is, you like to think you’re observant enough. The door is locked again, so you figure he didn’t leave and someone didn’t break in. 
“Jason?” You turn the corner to the kitchen and see him standing with a bag of Ihop, staring at you as if he’d gotten caught stealing from the cookie jar. 
   “Good morning,” His eyes flicker to the gun as you set it on the counter. A part of him is proud that you were hesitant enough to bring the gun with you. “I got breakfast.” 
“Aw,” You grin. “Post hate crime meal!” 
“That’s an insane sentence,” He tells you, unpacking what he had gotten. “I didn’t know what you’d like, so I got you blueberry pancakes, french toast, eggs, and bacon. And the orange juice,” He places two boxes and a large cup of orange juice in front of you, then the straw. But you’re just focused on the fact that you know for a fact that wasn’t a random order. You’d posted about that exact order once before. Maybe a month or so ago. 
   “Oh,” You hum, looking at the food and then at him. “That’s sweet. Thank you.” He hums back, dropping the bag down to the floor, and takes his food. He’d gotten strawberry pancakes, hash browns, an omelet, and a coffee. 
Now you feel bad for not having a coffee table. 
“Wanna watch something while we eat?” You point your thumb toward the living room and he nods. 
While in the middle of watching Breaking Bad, you get up to set the empty containers in the sink and the cup in the trash while Jason watches. He doesn’t really know what to do, he wants to sleep, having stayed up the entire night in case anything happened but he’s enjoying his time with you. Even if the circumstances were… less than ideal. 
“Do you work today?” He asks when you’re walking back. 
   “Depends if my sister calls out,” Sitting, you turn your body to look at him. “I work Wednesday through Sunday, most weeks, at least.” 
“Are you going to make the report?” He also turns his body to you, watching as you toss your head back and sigh. 
   “Probably not,” You admit, looking back at him. “It’s more effort than I care to do,” He blinks, clearly disappointed but he’s not going to push. 
   “You should carry a weapon.” Jason’s not really asking, he’s telling you. “How good are you with a gun?” 
“Not sure,” 
“You bought a gun without training for it?” He asks, slowly as if he’s waiting for you to correct him and tell him that you actually go to the gun range in your free time. 
   “My dad got me it when I moved out.” You shrug, feeling a little ashamed because now he’s looking at you like you’re insane. “He said I needed protection and he doesn’t believe in mace or tasers.” 
“Clearly you do!” He throws his hand up towards the door. “We’re going to the gun range today.” 
“Jay!” You groan, nudging his leg with your foot. He grabs it and slides you down the couch. “I’m fine.” He just hums and leans over you, it doesn’t do much. Aside from shutting you up. 
He’s staring at you, his eyes unwavering from yours while you can’t seem to settle on where to look. It’s making you nervous— he’s making you nervous. The proximity isn’t the biggest issue, no the issue is the fact that you don’t mind that he’s above you, his hand right next to your head, and for fucks sake his breathing is even. 
“You’re going.” 
“Yup,”
Weirdly enough, the shooting range wasn’t in some building. No, Jason had decided to drive the hour's ride to a private lot. While normally you don’t agree to be in the middle of butt fuck nowhere without your own means of leaving, you were willing to bend your rules this one time. 
He has you help with setting up the cans and the body dummies, which are incredibly lifelike. A little creepy, but whatever floats his boat, you guess. He also puts up a new target sheet on a metal wall before he returns to hand you a handgun and ear mufflers. 
“Don’t hold it like that,” He blinks as you’re pointing the gun directly at your foot. You’re not a fool, you’ve played a couple of shooter games before. 
   “The safety is on,” You justify but point it toward the ground instead. Just to keep him happy. He just sighs and grabs his own gun, pointing it toward the dummy. 
“Stand like this,” He watches you from the corner of his eye as you mimic his stance. It’s a little uncomfortable but very technical. “A little straighter.” Fixing your posture he nods and drops his stance to adjust your grip on the gun. He takes your hands and adjusts them appropriately. “It’s not accurate for beginners, but I learned this way.” He explains as he steps behind you and lowers himself to your height. It’s hard when you’re not the same six foot-five that he is, but that’s neither here nor there. 
With his line of sight that is the same as yours, he raises your hands a little higher and a little to the left. You trust his judgment, you’re no fool on how accurate Red Hood is with his guns. 
It's silent, so silent that you can hear him breathing even through the heavy earmuffs. Whether you like it or not, you start to stop focusing on the task at hand and on him. He smells like your soap, too. It’s a little too domestic for the setting you’re in. 
“Take it off of safety,” He instructs, taking two steps away. Doing as he says, you want to roll your shoulders back but you’re worried you’d lose the position. “Go ahead.” His arms cross as he stares ahead at the dummy and you catch the flex of muscle under his shirt. 
Adjusting yourself as lowkey as you can, you close one eye and press the trigger. It's harder than you would’ve thought, giving you only a moment to back out. Following through, you let the recoil push you back a little before looking at the dummy. It didn’t hit the center of the head, instead grazing over the ear. 
“Close,” Jason looks over at you as you’re rubbing your shoulder but stops when you catch him looking at you. “Again?”
“I mean,” One of your friends, Tasha, takes a long sip of her drink. “None of us wanted to say anything but Gina is a bitch.” Frowning, you push around your food with the back of your fork. What was supposed to be your friend group's monthly putting ended up becoming a major therapy session when they noticed that Gina wasn’t there. 
   “Yeah,” Dante gives you a sort of frown sort of smile. “But you’d been friends with her for longer than us, so it wasn’t really our place.” 
“It’s crazy that it took her boyfriend trying to kill me to realize that, though.” It felt a bit weird, she’d always been in your life, and before the whole incident, you never would’ve thought you’d be without her. But life was the same, if not better with her gone. You didn’t realize how much you didn’t need her until now and honestly, you’re just upset it didn’t happen sooner.
Especially considering all of your other friends didn’t like her. 
“Speaking of,” Alex cranes her neck to look at you. “Who’s Jason?” She grins as your eyes narrow. You’re not one to divulge about your life, especially over text. 
   “How do you know about him?” Setting your fork down, she snorts before digging back into her meal. 
   “Girl, I was the Uber Eats driver.” She explains and looks to the others who are clearly out of the loop. “My first order of the day, some guy named Jason with a blank profile. Whatever, right? I pick up the Ihop order— he knows your taste, cute.” She quickly adds. “And then, I get the address. I’m just thinking (Y/n) created a fake profile. Nah, bro!” She covers her mouth to stop her laughing and to stop any potential food from flying out of her mouth. 
“I knock and this tall guy with this hot face scar opens the door. If he would’ve asked I would’ve taken the tip,” And she didn’t mean money. 
“Clearly he already did!” Dante cackles, watching as you drown yourself in the soda you’d ordered. The others laugh while you have to do damage control. 
“Jay’s a friend who happened to be in the neighborhood when Kyle was chasing me,” The three look at each other, ever aware of the fact that you’re staring at your plate while talking. They just assume the friend part is a lie. “And he spent the night. On the couch.” You add, looking at each of them to make sure that they understand. 
  “And ordered you breakfast in bed. And he left a hundred-dollar tip,” Alex swirls her pasta around her fork while the others gape at the news. 
   “Oh girl,” Tasha looks over at you. “He got a sister?” 
“Too young for your old ass!” You laugh while she pretends to be offended. “His sisters are nineteen and eighteen.” You wondered if you should add Barbra to his list of family. But you think she’s more of an acquaintance than family. But you could be wrong. 
   “You know his family?” Tasha’s eyebrows furrow. 
   “I know of his family. Never met that before.”
“Ah, waiting for the one-year mark?” Alex nods as if she had caught the drift you are trying to get at. 
   “Oh my god,” Rolling your eyes, you lean back in your seat. 
“What? You’re acting like you’re not attracted to that man. He’s fine as hell!” Alex pushes her hair behind her ear as she talks. “Might have to revoke your gay card.” 
“I never said that, it’s just…” Rubbing your hands on your pants, your face scrunches. “He could be straight.” Now, you weren’t going to deny the fact that Jason was attractive. He was the embodiment of your personal preferences, but you were a chronic overthinker with these sorts of things. To the point where it needs to be spelled out for you to get any hints. 
“He got you breakfast in bed.” Dante sounds out each word, putting an equal amount of extra emphasis on it. Just to make sure it really sinks in. 
   “I did that for you guys before!” You defend. 
    “Fine— fine, how do you know him?” Tasha asks and the others nod, happily awaiting your response. 
“He comes into the shop every Sunday. He’s been coming for about four years, give or take.” You shrug and they blink at each other. This is why you’re still single. 
    “Isn’t he the one that bought you Five Guys last month?” Dante is now physically turned to you, his eyes wide and you grumble. You never told them about that. 
   “You’re lying,” Alex cackles. “That’s your man and you don’t wanna admit it. Five guys is expensive.” 
“How about this?” Dante rolls his hand before you can even reply to Alex. “If one of Tasha’s friends got her an expensive lunch without asking, showed up to her job every single shift for four years, stayed with her after a traumatic night, got her breakfast, and didn’t leave until she was truly safe; how much platonic energy does that give you?” 
“Not a lot, but—“
“Nah,” Dante holds your hands as he speaks. “I love you, so don’t take this the wrong way but you’re stupid as fuck. He wants you.”
“He wants the books I sell. And my friendship.”
“He wants to spread something other than pages.” He shakes his head and you snort. “Ask him out, if he says no. Then I owe you a grand.”
“You don’t have a grand.” You deadpan and he nods. 
   “I’m so sure he’ll say yes that I’m making that bet.”
“Fine,” You huff. “But if this ruins my friendship you all owe me lunch for a month.” Surprisingly, they all agree and you settle on asking him on the upcoming Sunday. So, the very next day. 
“Why are your friends watching you?” Your sister asks as she walks behind you to grab one of the display books and swap it for a different one. 
   “Don’t worry about them,” You mutter, too busy watching the window; waiting for the motorcycle to stop in front of the store. She notices, of course, and stands behind you before deciding it was time to take her break and join your friends upstairs. 
Eventually, you see his motorcycle pull up and sigh, fixing your apron but stop when you hear them snickering. This whole situation was stupid, that’s what you’ve decided. But you’ve made your bed, it was time to lie in it. 
Jason walks in, his eyes immediately finding yours but you’re busy ringing someone up. He grabs the basket from the front of the shop and walks around the shop until he sees the line is gone. 
“Jay,” You grin, holding onto the counter. 
   “(Y/n),” His eyes focus on your hands for a second before he grabs a chocolate from the basket. Glancing at your friends, you fix your posture and reassure yourself. “Anything new?” Typically, you’d already be talking about what’s new but there’s just this hanging silence. 
“Nah,” You shake your head but still double-check the inventory log. “But we’re getting some um… science fiction stuff next week.” He’s not too big on those, maybe once in a blue moon he’ll actually buy one. He goes to talk but your phone dings before he can open his mouth. Watching as you grab your phone, your eyes scan over a text before you huff and silence it. 
“I heard about…” You trail into a whisper. “The Riddler kidnapping, you okay?” Not the best way to lead into asking someone out, but hey. Could’ve been worse. 
   “I’m fine,” He nods. “Arms a little sore but I’ll live.” 
“Long enough to go on a date with me?” You ask, a bit quicker than you intended but thankfully your words haven’t jumped up. He laughs, his eyes closing and you falter, glancing up at your friends for some type of support. 
   “That was a bold transition,” He settles himself down. “When are you free?”
“Oh shit, for real?” You grin. “I’m free Monday. Or whenever you are, really. My shifts are pretty flexible,” 
“I’ll pick you up Monday,” 
“I asked you on the date,” You huff. “I’m picking you up.” He crosses his arms and his eyes lower into a sort of unamused expression. 
   “You’ll pick me up, from Gotham?” He asks, just to make sure you know what you’d be signing up for. Truthfully, you hadn’t. And as such, you weigh your options— you don’t even have a car to offer to pick him up in. Damn. 
    “Fine, Monday at eight.” Giving in, he nods and glances around the shop. 
   “I don’t need a book today, see you tomorrow.” He looks you up and down, this time you watch as his eyes slowly drag down and tilt your head. 
“Looking like you already wanna kiss me, Jay.” You joke as his eyes reach yours again. 
   “Since you offered.” He grins and sneaks one single kiss that lasts less than a second. 
“I get off in thirty,”
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potatoplace · 3 months ago
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Mother Knows Best
Poly!SJM Week 2025: Day 2 | @polysjmweek
Kallias x Viviane x Reader
Poly!ACOTAR x Reader Masterlist | Event Masterlist
Summary: Your High Lord and Lady, your closest friends, have called you in to see them for dinner. You're worried they know of your feelings for them, but it turns out, you have nothing to fear.
Warnings: mild angst but nothing bad
Words: ~2.2k
Author's Note: here's Day 2! A tiiiny bit late but who cares lol. I really liked getting to write this pairing, I'll definitely be doing more of them in the future!! Also if something doesn't make sense, yes it does. Read it on AO3!
18+ only pls
🩵🩵🤍🩵🩵
Your knees ached from kneeling on the cold marble for so long, your heart heavy from the prayers you’d been repeating in your head for over an hour.
You blessed me with such friendship, and cursed me with affection.
Please, just let me live without these feelings.
Let me stay with my friends.
Let them love me back.
Over and over, you prayed to the Mother to solve your problem. To keep you from being made to leave your court, to keep you with your oldest friends, the ones you love.
You had grown up in close proximity to both Kallias and Viviane, being an orphaned fae living in the Winter Court’s grand temple, connected to the High Lord’s palace. Your pale blue skin and curved, white horns on your head had made you feel out of place among so many High Fae, but Kal and Viv?
They had befriended you without a thought.
And while Viviane had moved away when you were all in your second century, the three of you had stayed thick as thieves, sneaking away every night before Winter Solstice to Kallias’s cabin, and any other night you could manage. You would stay up all night, catching up on the goings-on in your lives, drinking just enough spiced wine to warm your bodies against the inevitable blizzard raging outside.
Though even without the wine, or the blazing fire in the fireplace, their presence alone would have kept you plenty warm.
Your… Feelings for the pair had arisen on one of those nights, when the three of you had snuggled close under a blanket, Kallias and Viviane on either side of you. The closeness of them, the soft puff of their breath on your neck, the gentle brush of their hands.
Of course, it didn’t help that they were so kind and considerate, always willing to listen to you. And oh, how they brought you so much joy without even trying. Hearing about their day, or even the random, strange thoughts that would pop into their heads never failed to bring a smile to your face, spark the flame of joy within your chest.
And in the last century and a half, those feelings had never faded, only growing stronger with each passing day.
Of course, you had never spoken aloud your attraction, your love for either Kallias or Viviane, utterly afraid of rejection. You saw the way they looked at each other, the pure love in their eyes, even if they were too stubborn to admit it yet. Early on, you suspected that they were mates, with the way they were always on the same wavelength.
Kal had been busy being raised as the High Lord’s heir, most of his days crammed full of meetings and lessons. Viviane had been trained as a courtier, as well as honing her magical abilities with the help of Kallias, their powers so similar. And when Kal had sent her to a large border town, near the Summer Court, she had taken a position of leadership in their armed forces after excelling in physical combat, once given the chance to learn.
You had joined the priesthood early, as soon as you had been allowed by the High Priestess of Winter. She had taken you in at the age of two, the closest you had to a mother. In the four centuries you had been alive, you rose to the top of the ranks, your devotion to the mother and the people of Winter your top priority in every way. Just before the rule of Amarantha, you had earned the title of Head Priestess, just a step below the High Priestess, Jayna.
However… Amarantha had slaughtered most of the priestesses in Winter when your court had rebelled, along with the two dozen younglings who’d had their minds shattered by her daemati. Your near-mother, Jayna, had been among those killed.
In a cruel twist of fate, you had been given her position by Amarantha, her maniacal cackle still ringing in your ears some nights when she had appointed you, laughing about how distraught the Mother would be to see such pitiful scum, a lesser fae, in charge of one of her temples.
But when Kallias had been freed, nearly fifty years later?
He had officially appointed you as High Priestess, a new, more ornate circlet made for you to wear, made to fit easily around your curved horns - a detail that hadn’t gone unnoticed.
Before that, though, before he had given you your title, he had rushed to Viviane, confessing his love and asking for her hand in marriage. Not even a day later, you had married them using your title as High Priestess, your heart so, so happy, but so, so broken, three sharp, jagged pieces constantly digging into your chest.
You were so, unbelievably happy that your friends were married, and even happier that they were happily mated, their bond finally having come to life after the wedding night.
You only wished to be a part of it.
Over the past two years you had slowly withdrawn, leaving your friends space to learn their new relationship dynamic without your presence, an unwelcome third wheel.
Not that they’d indicated any discomfort with you being near them, but… You needed to give them space.
To give yourself space.
But earlier today, while you were taking your lunch, a note had arrived, sealed with Viviane’s personal seal.
Asking you to dinner, saying the three of you had something to discuss.
You’d managed to make your way through the rest of the day without giving away how utterly nervous you were feeling, performing blessings on those who came, seeking your help. An hour before you were due to arrive at the High Lord and Lady’s personal quarters, you sought the guidance of the Mother herself.
Well… Begged for guidance, help from the Mother. She had never led you wrong before, though you wish she’d allowed you more power to save those who had been under your care during Amarantha’s rule.
But now?
She was giving you nothing, no hints as to what to do in this situation.
And you were out of time.
With a sigh, you stood from your kneeling position at the altar, lowering your invoking stone back to your chest, resting over silvery blue robes.
You knew the way to their shared rooms so well, you could have walked the path with your eyes shut. But the closer you came to their door, the slower your steps, the more your nerves told you to turn around.
That wasn’t a possibility, though. You have to face them, even if it’s for the last time, for them to kick you out of their court.
You took a deep breath when you stood before their door, preparing yourself for whatever may happen once you enter. One knock and the door swung open, your hand still poised to knock again.
“Y/N! It’s so good to see you!” Viviane exclaimed, throwing her arms around you and squeezing you tightly, her vanilla and cinnamon scent washing over you as her silver hair bounced over your shoulders. She pulled back to look at you with her sparkling blue eyes before saying, “I feel like it’s been forever! And your hair looks gorgeous, by the way.” Her fingers ran through the ends of your hair, half an inch longer than when she’d last seen you, the natural curls of your azure hair a bit more noticeable.
“Thank you, Viv, and yes… It’s been a bit since we’ve met, just the three of us,” you said as she tugged you inside, closing the door behind you.
Their private dining table, made to seat four, was already set with dinner, steam rising from the roast chicken, and you could spy potatoes, carrots, and onions in the dish surrounding the bird. Kallias was busy pouring the wine, sparkling white, your favorite.
He looked up when you and Viviane approached him, a warm smile crossing his face when he saw you. “Y/N, it’s lovely to see you again dear,” he said before setting the bottle down on the table and approaching you, arms outstretched.
Even with your promise to yourself to give them space, you couldn’t help but melt into his hold, inhaling his refreshing pine and snow scent greedily.
“It’s good to see you too, Kal,” you said with a nervous smile when you pulled away. “The food looks lovely.”
Viviane smiled brightly at you before tugging you to the table, settling you into a chair before taking the one to your right, Kallias sitting to your left. He began carving the roast while Viviane dishes out the roasted vegetables and cut a fresh loaf of bread into thick slices.
Your hands rested uselessly in your lap as you watched them work, twitching every so often when it looks like they need help, but they never truly do.
And by the time the food was plated, your stomach was so twisted in knots all you could do was push food around your plate, occasionally taking a bite when you could manage.
It took maybe ten minutes for one of them to knock you out of your stupor.
“Y/N, is something wrong?” Kallias asked, concerned enough that your eyes snapped from a roast carrot to his ice blue eyes, fear in your heart that you’d been caught.
“Wha- what do you mean is something wrong?” you laughed nervously. “Nothing’s wro-”
“Don’t say that,” Viviane interrupted, a sharp look in her eye. “You’ve been avoiding us for the past year whenever you can, and don’t say you haven’t because you have.” She fixed you with a stare when you opened your mouth to deny the accusation. “And now you’ve barely eaten a thing, and you can’t even look me in the eye,” Viviane noted sadly.
“Don’t try to act like she’s not stating the facts, Y/N,” Kallias said gently, taking one of your hands into his. “We miss you, and we just want to know why. Why you’re pulling away from us.”
With both of them staring at you, their beautiful, concerned eyes watching your every move, you fell apart. You wrenched your hand from Kallias’s grasp to bury your face in both of them, wanting to hide the tears welling in your eyes, even if you knew it was useless in the long run.
You were still here, in their rooms, with few ways to escape the conversation other than fleeing the court entirely. And you weren’t willing to do that, unless you had to.
“Hey,” Viviane said softly, a delicate hand pulling yours away from your face, revealing red eyes with tears pooled in them. One fell down your cheek and Kallias’s thumb brushed it away. “Please, Y/N?”
More tears fell at her plea, and you shook your head. You wouldn’t - couldn’t tell them.
“Will you at least let us tell you the reason we invited you for dinner?” Kallias asked quietly, a hand cupping your cheek gently.
Tell you something? Probably that you’re banished from the court, your mind hissed at you.
But you needed to hear one way or the other.
So you nodded your head.
Viviane took a deep, calming breath before speaking. “I-I wanted to tell you that I love you, Y/N. And I… I’ve loved you for a long time,” she whispered.
Your heart caught in your throat - this couldn’t be real, could it?
Kallias turned your gaze from Viviane to him with a gentle hand on your chin. “I have loved you since we were younglings, Y/N, barely old enough to wander the city without guards accompanying me. I have loved you, and I wish that the mating bond would snap to include you to, I care for you so deeply. And Viv has told me the same, we just…” Kallias sighed.
“We can’t live without you, Y/N. Please, please come back to us,” Viviane pleaded as she held one of your hands tightly in hers.
You could hardly believe what you were hearing - Kallias and Viviane, your friends, your longtime crushes - they had felt the same way about you as you did them for years? A giggle left your lips at the idea, the sheer stupidity of the three of you.
The swish of Viv’s hair told you that she and Kal had made eye contact at the noise, likely exchanging concerned looks.
“Is… Is everything… Okay?” Viv asked shyly.
You giggled again. “Everything is- oh, Mother!” you laughed. “You’re telling me that we could have been happy together all this time?” You looked at the two of them, eyes bright. “Really?”
Viviane grinned at you. “Really,” she breathed.
“When you put it like that, the three of us do seem a bit foolish,” Kal chuckled before pressing a kiss to the back of your hand. “So? Will you have us?”
You smiled wide as you answered. “Yes!”
Immediately you were pulled from your chair as the two pushed it back, pulling you into their arms. “Oh, thank the Mother,” Kallias sighed.
It was Viviane who kissed you first, her soft, pink lips pressing gently to yours. Kallias’s followed shortly after, pressing more firmly to yours, more sure.
Tears filled your eyes for an entirely different reason.
Perhaps the Mother sent you no sign, no course of action for a reason. To be here.
The Mother knows best, after all.
🩵🩵🤍🩵🩵
General Taglist: @daughterofthemoons-stuff @lilah-asteria @meritxellao @twismare @wrenisrad @icey--stars
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bellaxgiornata · 1 year ago
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The Devil at Your Window |1: Snowed In|
Pairing: Matt Murdock x Fem!Reader Word count: 8k
Warnings/Tags: 18+; fluff, flirting, sexual tension, light angst, pining, eventual smut, identity reveal, and lots of black suit Matty
Series summary: In the middle of a New York City blizzard, the Devil of Hell's Kitchen accidentally lands himself on your fire escape–quite literally. When he accepts your invitation to warm up inside your apartment, you're surprised at how well the conversation flows all night with the curious and attractive masked vigilante. He's intriguing, though what you find even more intriguing is his unexpected returns to your window after that night–and his flirting. But when it seems like you're not the only one beginning to develop real feelings, he pulls back and you're left wondering two things: Why did he disappear and who really is the mysterious Devil that you've inevitably fallen for?
a/n: Just a short collection of one shots that I'll update whenever the ideas strike. It'll be told in a style like Falling for the Devil but it won't get nearly as long (unless y'all end up loving it, too). I just couldn't deny giving us all the fantasy of black suit Matt reappearing at your apartment window and all the flirting, sexual tension, feelings, and naughty things that might ensue... The installment list for this little series can be found here and feedback is always appreciated!
Tag list: @danzer8705 @darkened-writer
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Picking up the steaming mug of tea you’d just finished making from off the kitchen counter, you cradled your other hand around the warmth of the ceramic and drew it towards your chest as you turned and headed back towards your living room. The small spot of heat against the front of your sweatshirt caused a shiver to run down your spine as your sock-clad feet padded along the cold hardwood floor and back towards your couch. 
It was freezing inside your apartment tonight and the blustering snow storm raging outside in Hell’s Kitchen wasn't helping. Thankfully your office had already announced its closure for tomorrow before you'd finished work earlier this evening. The snow had already started to dump from the sky before you’d even left the office, falling heavy and wild as it accumulated in a cover of white that blanketed everything in the city. It would have been beautiful if you hadn’t needed to walk home afterwards in the frigid mess–especially with the way the large clumps of snowflakes pelted and battered you in the face over and over, the cold stinging at your skin. 
The city was expected to get a whopping eighteen inches of snowfall minimum over the next twenty-four hours, so you were grateful that your boss wanted as little to do with making it into work tomorrow as you did, especially because you couldn’t afford to do anything but walk to the office. The last thing you wanted to do was trudge through all of that mess and slip on a patch of ice, inevitably falling in a massive pile of snow and leaving you stuck in damp dress clothes all day. 
No, you'd rather stay dry and cozy at home enjoying a lazy day off of work.
You were just hoping the power in your apartment building remained intact throughout the fury of the winter storm. You didn’t want to think about losing the heat in your building in the middle of all of this. Another shiver ran through you as you pushed the thought away–hopefully not something you’d need to worry about tonight. 
But since you didn’t have work first thing in the morning, you had every intention of enjoying your night. You’d immediately come home and thrown off your dress clothes before settling on something comfortable–soft sweatpants and a cozy sweatshirt sans bra underneath. Then you’d made dinner and cleaned it up fast before claiming your ‘spot’ for the evening on your couch. Which consisted of both of your blankets and the television remote while you binged a guilty pleasure show that you hadn’t had time to catch up on for the past few weeks. Tonight you were intending to stay up a bit late, cozy up beneath your blankets, drink some hot tea, and lose yourself in the plot and romance of the show before eventually dragging your tired ass to bed in the hopes of sleeping in tomorrow to make up for staying up late. 
Eyes focused on the paused television screen as you moved, you rounded the side of your couch while drawing your steaming mug up to your lips. You sipped at the warm liquid, reveling in it for a moment before you swallowed it down. You could feel it heat you from the inside out as a pleasant sensation washed over you. Your eyes closed briefly for a moment–it was the first time you’d actually felt warm today. 
Opening your eyes, you continued towards the couch and began to lower yourself down onto the cushions while trying not to spill any of your tea from the mug. Just as you were about to sit back down on the couch and cocoon yourself in both of your blankets, ready to settle in for more of your show, something outside the window to your right caught your attention. Your head spun in the direction just as a flash of black dashed past the window and a loud bang reverberated through your apartment. 
A frightened yelp slipped out of you at the sound and you clutched your mug tight to your chest, your heart thudding heavily in terror. Whatever had just literally dropped onto your fire escape had been large, especially with the sound of that impact. Sucking in a breath, you held it as you stared transfixed at the window, almost ridiculously terrified it would be some sort of wild animal–like a bear or a wolf–on your fire escape. 
Though, more realistically considering you were in New York City, you knew it was probably a burglar. Who else would be traversing fire escapes late at night? Especially dressed in all dark clothes? Except…that also seemed a little ridiculous, too. There was a literal blizzard happening outside, meaning everyone would be home. In their apartments. Making it impossible for a burglar to break into anyone’s place unseen. Plus, it was insane outside, what criminal would risk dealing with that right now?
So what the hell had just fallen onto your fire escape?
Another thought struck you soon after and your lips parted in shock at the idea as you blew out the breath you’d been holding. With trembling hands, you very slowly reached out, carefully placing your mug of tea onto the coffee table before you without taking your eyes off of your window. Gradually, almost nervously, you rose to your feet before taking hesitant step after hesitant step forward. Another sharp, surprised gasp flew out of you when you saw the dark figure sit upright on your fire escape, bent in half as if they were in pain. Which made sense, considering the fall they’d just taken.
But your body froze up instantly at the sight of the man dressed in all black bent in half and dusted in white patches of snow. He wasn’t a burglar at all. With the black cloth tied over his head and the form fitting shirt he was wearing, there was absolutely no mistaking who he was. You'd certainly seen enough images of him plastered across the media. 
The Devil of Hell’s Kitchen had just fallen onto your fire escape.
Eyes widening in shock at the infamous vigilante attempting to pull himself up to his feet, one of his gloved hands holding onto the metal railing of your fire escape, you were suddenly overcome with the urge to check on him. To make sure he wasn’t seriously injured from that fall. 
Without thinking your actions through, you crossed the last few steps to the window and unlatched the locks before pushing it up. The masked figure immediately spun towards you at the sound as a bitter gust of wind burst its way into your apartment, chilling you instantly while those thick snowflakes once again assailed your face. For a moment you locked eyes with him–or at least, it seemed like you did despite the fabric covering half of his face–as your mouth hung open. You suddenly found yourself at a loss of what to say in the moment. And considering the way his lips thinned out along his face and the way he remained silent, he clearly wasn’t going to strike up a conversation with you, either.
Eyes darting down, you saw he had one gloved hand clutching at his right side as if it hurt him. His shoulders were hunched in on himself as his back faced the violent winds blowing snow relentlessly. Seeing him in person for the first time ever–something you’d never expected in your life considering how elusive the media made him out to be–you realized just how thin and unprotective his clothes really were. Especially tonight considering the cold weather. He had to be freezing.
An icy wind whistled loudly, another flurry of heavy snowflakes pelting you right in the face and breaking you from your thoughts. Blinking the snow from your lashes, you finally found your voice. 
“Are you alright?” you asked hesitantly, unsure how one should approach the masked man. “I just–just saw you fall. It looked like it hurt.”
He gave a curt shake of his head, wincing before he turned more towards the railing. “I’m fine, don’t worry about me,” he replied.
Something warm flooded your veins at the gravelly tone of his voice. It suited him somehow, even if it sounded fake. Like he was pitching his voice lower to sound like someone else in order to hide his identity. Not that you'd probably have recognized him anyway. 
With his back partially to you now, especially this close when there was barely a few feet of space between the pair of you, you could see just how incredibly muscular this man was. His black shirt clung to him like a second skin, the toned abdominal muscles on his upper body clearly visible even from just his profile. Even the pectoral muscles of his chest were well defined and visible beneath the sheen of black. His arms were thick–far too big for just one of your hands to wrap around. And as your gaze lingered lower, you fought back the thoughts that entered your mind at the sight of how large his thighs were in those tight pants–and how pleasant a profile his ass also had. You wondered briefly if he'd gained all that from working out or if it had more to do with his nightly activities.
Though when you saw him grab onto the metal railing of your fire escape with both of his gloved hands, the movement drawing your attention away from observing him as he attempted to swing himself over it, you nearly screamed as you lurched forward. You lived on the fifth floor, was this man really about to fling himself off of the fire escape from all the way up here? 
But the scream died in your throat the moment he cried out in pain, his feet slipping from off of the railing as he fell back onto your fire escape. He let out a hiss of pain as he clutched at his clearly injured side.
“Holy shit,” you breathed out, shoving the window open wider despite the cold and snow and leaning further forward. “You’re clearly not okay. Do you need something? An ambulance or something? Is there someone I can call? Or–or something I can do to help?”
The man rolled off his injured side and onto his back, gradually turning towards you as he lay on the fire escape. You hadn’t expected the amused and pained chuckle he emitted while the snow accumulated on the entire front of him, lightly covering the thin layer of his black shirt. Which you’d noticed had ridden up, revealing a small sliver of skin just above the dark, form fitting pants he was wearing. You tried hard to not keep glancing back at that patch of skin as it slowly rose higher and higher, unsure why you were so distracted by it.
The sound of his amusement soon drew you back to the moment and you cringed. Why the hell was he laughing?
“Are you alright? Did you…hit your head?” you asked him cautiously. “Maybe you have a concussion…”
Another amused sound slipped out of him, but that was quickly followed by a pained groan as he tried to once again rise up onto his feet. “I don’t have a concussion,” he assured you.
“You sure?” you asked, an eyebrow arching onto your forehead as you crossed your arms over your chest to stay warm when you began to shiver from the cold. “Because this doesn’t seem like a funny situation to me.”
“Well,” he grunted out, wincing as he drew back up to his full height, “normally I’m the one offering assistance, not the other way around. So yeah,” he continued with a faint shrug, your eyes once again catching the way he was holding his side, “it’s kind of amusing. In an…irritating sort of way.”
Your heart sank to your stomach at his words. “Oh, sorry,” you muttered, heat rushing up to your face instantly. “I didn’t mean to be annoying. I was just concerned–”
He took a half step forward, cutting you off as he waved a hand between the pair of you. He shook his head, letting out a slight huff of laughter. “No, I didn’t mean you were irritating. Just…this situation. The–the snow and the falling part.” In a quieter voice he added, “And having an audience for it.”
Chewing the inside of your cheek, you stood there studying him for a moment. He was injured and wearing barely anything at all in the middle of a blizzard. He looked like he needed help even if he seemed like the type not to ask for it.
“Do you want to come inside?” you blurted, unable to stop yourself. “I mean, to get warm and maybe sit down for a moment? I could call an ambulance or–or a taxi or something to bring you to a hospital.”
Another amused huff of laughter slipped out of him as he shook his head. “No hospitals, please. I’ll be alright. But…if you’re offering, I wouldn’t mind a moment to warm up.” His gloved hand lowered, pinching a bit of fabric from his shirt as he glanced down at it. “Admittedly this doesn’t offer much protection from the elements.”
You eyed the thin material between his gloves doubtfully. “Doesn’t look like it offers much protection from anything,” you told him.
A surprised bark of laughter peeled out of him, the sound drawing a smile onto your face. You’d made the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen laugh. Now that was something you weren’t going to forget anytime soon. He didn’t seem like the type to break character easily.
“You wouldn’t be wrong,” he agreed, his laughter subsiding.
Taking a step back from the window, you waved a hand towards him, gesturing for him to come inside. “How about you come in so I can close this window and we both can stop freezing?” you suggested, surprised at how bold you sounded considering who it was you were speaking with. “I’m shivering already so I can only imagine how cold you must be.”
You watched as his lips curled up into a charming grin at the corners, just beneath the black fabric of his mask. It was impossible to deny that he had a handsome face–at least, from what you could see of it. You imagined the rest of it to be just as attractive beneath that cloth and a sudden intense curiosity to know what the rest of it looked like overtook you as you watched him carefully climb through your opened window. He moved slowly, wincing in pain as he made his way inside. Despite his tough act, that fall must’ve really hurt his side and you frowned, wishing he’d accept your offer to help. There was no way he was as fine as he claimed to be, surely he needed medical attention.
“Takes a special kind of person to just invite me into their home so readily,” the Devil’s rough tone came out as he turned his back to you, shutting the window after himself. “Normally people prefer to avoid me.”
“You’re not dangerous,” you replied almost instantly.
The window closed with a sharp clack before his masked face turned over his snow-dusted shoulder, his attention fixed on you. “Oh?” he asked curiously, a smirk growing over his lips. “I’m not?”
Your eyes were drawn to his mouth, though it wasn’t like there was anywhere else to look when you spoke to him with that mask covering most of his face. The smirk appeared teasing, and for some reason that had the hair on the back of your neck bristling. You suddenly became very aware of the fact that you weren’t wearing a bra beneath your loose sweatshirt and it was now cold in your apartment. Quickly your arms wrapped over your chest, hugging yourself tight. His lips almost seemed to curl ever higher in response.
“I mean, you are ,” you amended, “but to, you know, criminals.” 
You swallowed hard when he remained still, gazing at you over his shoulder wordlessly.There was something almost predatory in the way he was studying you. It was easy to see how this lone man terrified the criminals on the streets of Hell’s Kitchen, striking fear into them. He certainly had a presence. Goosebumps rippled beneath the sleeves of your sweatshirt at his continued silent stare.
“Right?” you asked tentatively, voice softer.
His smirk vanished as the other corner of his mouth curled upwards into what felt like a warm smile despite you being unable to see if it reached his eyes. He nodded gently, turning slowly back towards you as he did. 
“That's correct,” he agreed, brushing the snow from his broad shoulders. “I’m only dangerous to criminals. So unless you’re hiding any dead bodies or have some outstanding charges…?”
You laughed, though abruptly you snatched your bottom lip between your teeth in an attempt to quiet the noise instantly. He was witty and funny. You weren’t anticipating that. Or the way your reaction to his quips seemed to please him, like he was trying to charm you. Which seemed even more curious, considering who he was and what he spent his nights doing. 
“Can't say that I do,” you said. “I'm probably the most boring person in Hell’s Kitchen.”
“Well now,” he replied teasingly, “don't sell yourself short. I'm sure you're not taking that title  all by yourself.” 
That charming smile was back on his face and it had your stomach fluttering. Tearing your eyes away from him, you noticed the television was still paused on your show. Paused on a scene where the two actors on screen were clearly about to kiss. Cheeks burning, you hurried over and grabbed the remote from the couch and turned it off. 
“You can make yourself comfortable if you want,” you told him, trying to keep the embarrassment out of your tone. “I've got a couple of blankets you can use to help warm you up.”
His heavy boots thudded with each of his steps as he crossed the room and made his way to the couch. You bent over, grabbing both blankets from your place on the couch where you'd previously been curled up as he passed behind you. The moment one of his cold gloves brushed against your back, you froze.
“Sorry,” he whispered. 
“No it's–it's fine,” you replied. 
He passed behind you before settling onto the opposite end of the couch from where you had clearly taken residence. You forced a smile onto your face as you turned and leaned over, holding out the blankets towards him. 
Pull yourself together , you internally chastised yourself. Just because it's been a while since you've had a man here doesn't mean you need to react to every little thing. That's not what this is, obviously. 
“Thank you,” he said, accepting the blankets from your outstretched hand. 
You nodded before sitting back down on the opposite end of the couch, keeping space between you and him. Curling your legs up under yourself, you watched as the Devil wasted no time throwing both blankets around himself, beginning to visibly shiver beneath them as he tried to warm up.
“Are you sure you don't want me to call anyone?” you asked him.
“No one to call,” he answered. “And a hospital would defeat the purpose of trying to remain anonymous.”
“I suppose that makes sense,” you muttered, glancing away and spotting the forgotten tea on your coffee table. “Would you like something to drink at least? Some water or some hot tea, maybe?”
His masked head tilted curiously to the side at your question, a grin returning to his plush lips. “Playing hostess?” he asked. 
“Well I'm sure you've got to be thirsty running around Hell’s Kitchen and fighting criminals all the time,” you explained. “I always sort of wondered if you stashed water bottles around the city or stopped for water breaks somewhere–not where you live, I imagine. Since you're trying to keep your identity hidden.” Your eyes narrowed as you added, “Or do you just let yourself get dehydrated every time you're out? Because that's not good for you, you know.”
The Devil's grin grew wider as he shifted on the couch, facing you even more from his place on the cushions. “Oh?” he asked, curiosity in his tone. “You've thought about me before, have you?”
Eyes dropping down to your lap, you smiled sheepishly as you shrugged. “I mean, I've had some theories circulating about you ever since you kept reappearing in the news,” you admitted awkwardly. “Sort of hard not to.”
“Well now you have to indulge me,” he teased. “Enlighten me on some of these theories of yours.”
Tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, you continued to avoid his covered stare. “I mean, they're not that interesting…”
“Oh come on,” he tried again. “It's not like we don't have the time. And maybe I can confirm or deny some of them for you. Besides, I admit I’m curious to know what you think of me. Especially being so willing to offer help like you did.”
Chewing your bottom lip, you glanced up at him from beneath your lashes. He looked far less intimidating beneath your blush pink blanket now. What would it hurt if you told him a few of your ideas about the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen? Maybe he might laugh at them, but would hearing that sound again be all that bad? And it truly would be interesting to learn more about the mysterious vigilante, something you'd probably never have the opportunity to do again. 
“Okay,” you agreed with a nod. Straightening up on the couch, you turned to face him more fully. “So I've always thought with the way that you fight that you were trained by some sort of secret ninja assassin organization.”
A hearty chuckle filled your living room at your first theory. The pleasant and resonant noise left you grinning as your stomach fluttered in response. You briefly wondered how often the Devil actually laughed when he was out. 
“I cannot confirm nor deny that,” he responded. 
The playful smile that kept appearing on his face was beginning to further disarm you. You found yourself enjoying his company, soon becoming used to the way half his face was hidden from sight with that ridiculous fabric. And for some reason your unexplainable attraction to him was only growing. 
“Next theory,” he prodded, the smile on his face apparent even in his voice. 
“You're not wealthy,” you stated, leaning forward and grabbing your tea from the coffee table.
“Oh, ow,” he joked, playfully recoiling back from you on the couch. “What makes you say that?”
You waved a hand at him across from you as you settled back into the cushions, mug in hand. “Because you wear clothing that is obviously not meant to protect you very well in a fight,” you answered. “I imagine if you had money you'd have something…nicer. Meant for what you do. And,” you continued, pausing long enough to drink down some of your now barely warm tea, aware of him focused on you, “you protect Hell’s Kitchen. Only Hell’s Kitchen. This part of the city isn't exactly filled with the wealthiest people. And with how dedicated you are to everyone here, I assume it's because you probably grew up here yourself. Most likely still reside here, too.”
The Devil hummed appreciatively when you'd quieted, his masked gaze still on you. You swore you could feel it as you drank down more of your tea.
“You're observant,” he mused. “Maybe I need to watch myself around you.”
A surge of pride swelled in your chest; you hadn't expected his praise. Or the way it would make you feel. And apparently, you'd guessed something right about him. 
“You're also not married or in a serious relationship,” you blurted before you could help yourself, wondering what more you could learn about him.
“Poor and unlovable?” the Devil asked with a surprised laugh. “That's what you think of me?”
“No,” you disagreed, laughing a little with him as you shook your head. “No, but I mean, I imagine you don't have time for someone else. And I figure most people wouldn’t like their partner going out and doing what you do. Putting yourself in danger.”
“Mmm,” he hummed out, shifting on the couch and making himself more comfortable. “A partner would certainly be…a distraction. A liability. One I couldn't really afford to have. So no, you're not wrong, I don't have one.”
You glanced down at your lap, your fingers fidgeting with the mug in your hands. Half of you was hoping to hear that he wasn't with anyone–though you refused to admit to yourself why that mattered–but the other half of you had heard the way he'd said that a partner would be a distracting liability and you’d felt a sad pang hit you in the chest. Considering how much he seemed to be enjoying your company when he didn't even know you had you guessing that the Devil was a lonely man deep down. 
But that wasn't a theory you felt comfortable sharing. 
“Any others?” he asked, breaking through your thoughts.
Clearing your throat, you focused back on him across the couch from you. His smile had disappeared, his lips now downturned at the corners just a bit. His posture had changed in your silence, the same as his mood, as if he'd picked up on the subtle change in yours somehow. 
Strange.
“I imagine you're the kind of guy who's fridge is always empty,” you answered.
A ghost of a smile reappeared on his face as he huffed out an amused breath. You couldn't fight the smile returning to your own lips at the sight of his again. 
“Well hey now,” he countered lightly, “there's usually beer. Sometimes orange juice and eggs.”
You giggled, unable to stop yourself. “Who'd have guessed the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen is just your average bachelor?” 
“Average?” he repeated in mock offense, his head tilting to the side. “I'm just average now?”
Quirking a brow at him in a challenging manner, your own head cocked to the side. “Maybe tell me more about yourself and I could say otherwise,” you boldly teased back. 
“Well obviously,” he began, grinning at you in a way that had your body heating, “I can't exactly do that now can I? Defeats the purpose–
“Of remaining anonymous,” you finished for him. “I've picked up on the importance of that.” 
A silence soon settled between the pair of you, one that slowly began to cause your nerves to grow with the way he kept smiling at you. Once again you desperately found yourself wanting to see the rest of his face, curious to know just how handsome he really was under that black mask. Though you settled for studying what you could see, your eyes tracing the soft curves of his pink lips, noticing the way they very minutely twitched under your scrutiny. Eventually your gaze dropped down, following the hard lines of his stubbled jaw. As your eyes trailed further down, they lingered on the part of his neck that wasn't covered by the blankets he’d wrapped around himself for warmth. A heat burned in you as the urge to reach out and just touch him, just to see if he was real, suddenly grew within you. It didn't help that it almost felt like you could feel the weight of his own eyes fixed on you beneath the mask, once again making you very aware of your lack of bra beneath your sweatshirt.
Catching your lip between your teeth, you noticed the way his throat bobbed with a hard swallow. Had he been having similar thoughts? Observing you, too? 
Inhaling a sharp breath through your nose at the idea, you knew you needed to stop this line of thinking and stop it fast. There was absolutely no way the Devil would be interested in you. Certainly not like that. That was absurd.
“Would you like something to eat?” you asked, trying to calm your pulse. “If your fridge is empty all the time I'm guessing you could use something to eat.”
“I mean, I suppose if you’re–”
He stopped short the exact moment that the lights died, throwing the pair of you into almost complete darkness. You sucked in a breath, turning to look out the window just to your right. It was eerily dark outside, a sight that was rare in the city. Even the buildings across the street had been thrown into darkness. There was nothing but the howling wind and snow outside.
“Guess it was too much to hope the power wouldn’t go out in this mess,” you breathed out.
“I suppose so,” he replied, his tone just as soft.
Reaching blindly forward, you set your almost empty mug onto the coffee table before you. For a moment you reached around on the surface until your fingers brushed against your phone. You picked it up and unlocked the screen, grateful for the bit of light it shed in the dark as you turned on the flashlight function.
“So I can’t offer you a nice cooked meal without power,” you told him, rising to your feet, “but I can get you an apple and a couple of protein bars? If you’d…like?”
“You don’t have to, but I’d appreciate it,” he said.
“It’s the least I can do for the man who does so much for the rest of us,” you told him, maneuvering around the couch and navigating your way to the kitchen by the light of your phone. “I’d feel awful leaving you hungry and dehydrated.”
Wrapping one arm around your chest to try to fight the chill that had been steadily creeping into you, you headed towards a cabinet near the sink. Reaching up, you grabbed a glass from out of it before taking a moment to fill it beneath the faucet before setting it along the countertop. Then you plucked an apple out of a fruit bowl on your counter, taking a moment to rinse it off first. The moment you’d turned off the faucet you heard his voice from across the apartment.
“You’re cold.”
For a moment you found it odd how his words hadn’t come out as a question but more of an observation, though you quickly shrugged the strangeness of that aside. You set the apple down on the counter beside the glass of water before sliding a step to your right and opening up another cabinet.
“It’s alright, I’m fine,” you answered, trying to shine the light from your phone into the cabinet to read the labels on the boxes. “I wasn’t the one out in that snowstorm wearing barely anything at all.”
“You say that like I was out there naked.”
His voice had unexpectedly come from just behind you this time and it jolted your heart in your chest instantly. His sudden proximity mixed with his word choice had you startling on the spot. Your hand that had been about to pull the box of protein bars out of the cabinet accidentally bumped it instead, causing the entire box to slip off of the shelf. But before it could tumble to the floor and spill its contents, a black gloved hand darted out beside your face, catching it before it had barely fallen six inches. 
You stood there rooted to the spot, his hand just brushing your arm as his held the box of protein bars. The hair on the back of your neck had risen, aware that he was standing barely a foot behind you now. Slowly, you turned over your shoulder to look at him. Your pulse quickened further at how close his face was to yours. He was looking at you, too. Or at least, he was facing you. Eyes dropping down, you couldn’t help but notice that mouth of his again. 
“I apologize,” he said, your eyes watching as his lips moved. “I didn’t mean to startle you. Sometimes I forget how quiet I can be. I just wanted to give you one of the blankets. No sense in me using both when you’re cold.”
“Oh,” you whispered, unable to form any other response.
With his attention still on you, he reached up and slid the box back onto the shelf. Then he seemed to take a purposeful step back from you, his lips set in a straight line. You wondered what was going on in his mind right now, because you were sure there had to be something. Had he felt the tension you’d just felt? Or were you just ridiculous and overly hopeful?
And why did it even matter? You were never going to see this man again after tonight anyway.
Blinking a few times, you returned your attention to the shelf. Reaching up, you slid your hand into the box that had nearly taken a nosedive to your kitchen floor and pulled out two protein bars. Keeping your eyes actively focused away from the Devil nearby, you closed the cabinet and slid a step back to your left, grabbing the glass of water in your hand with your phone and the apple in the same hand as the bars. Though before you could turn around, you felt something gently drape over your shoulders. Looking down, you noticed it was the pink blanket he’d been wearing.
“Like I said,” he repeated, “there’s no sense in me using both.”
“Right,” you whispered, pulse pounding in your throat.
Turning on your heel, you stepped past him and made your way back to the living room by the light of your phone. This time you heard the heavy steps of him following after you. You assumed that was intentional.
“So why were you out in this blizzard tonight anyway?” you asked him, making your way around the couch. You hoped having something to talk about would distract you from whatever it was he kept stirring inside of you. “Surely there aren’t a lot of crimes being committed in this weather?”
The Devil let out a light laugh as he accepted the offered glass of water and food from you. One of your brows quirked curiously onto your forehead at his reaction as you sat back down in your original spot on the couch. Though you noticed as he took a large drink from the cup while lowering himself onto the cushions that he’d sat closer to you than before. You watched as he ripped open a protein bar and tore off a large bite next, but he didn't answer until a moment later when he’d swallowed the bite down. Internally you noted he must’ve been hungrier than he let on with the way he was devouring that bar and you’d wished you’d had more food to offer him with the power out.
“You’d be correct,” he told you. “And yet I still stupidly made my way out into this storm tonight in the hopes of catching a lead on something. Instead all I got was my ass frozen and my side bruised.” 
You watched as he took another large bite of the protein bar, chewing it almost contemplatively as his head canted to the side. You could still see him in the beam of light from your phone which you were still clutching in your hand. Somehow this lighting made him even more appealing as it cast sharp shadows along his jaw.
“Though I suppose unexpectedly meeting you was a highlight,” he added, causing your cheeks to flush. “But you know, you never did give me your name.”
“Well you never exactly gave me yours,” you immediately quipped back.
Those beautiful lips of his curved upwards yet again as he chewed the last bite of the first protein bar. What you wouldn’t give to see if that smile had reached his eyes.
“Alright, point taken,” he replied. 
Tearing your gaze away from him, you focused on your phone. If you kept the flashlight running the battery would die in no time. And who knew how long the power might be out for, you might need it later. You supposed you didn't need it on just for a conversation.
“I’m going to turn the flashlight off on my phone for now, if that's alright?” you told him, fingers darting across the screen to do just that. “Might need the battery on this later.”
“That’s alright,” he replied, sounding as if he was chewing another bite of food. “I don’t need it.”
He’d made the comment just as you’d leaned forward to set your phone back onto the coffee table, but you’d paused as the words processed in your mind. Your eyes narrowed again as your mind raced. Something about the way he’d said that sounded as if it had another meaning to it. But before you could put too much thought into it, he’d changed the topic.
“You’re still cold,” he pointed out. “That blanket alone isn't helping.”
Brows furrowing together as you slowly sat back, you wondered how he could possibly know that. The pair of you were in almost pitch black again with your phone flashlight off. It wasn't like he could see you and you hadn't been shivering, though there were definitely goosebumps dotting your skin. How could he possibly know? 
“I’m fine,” you said, pulling the blanket you had on tighter around yourself. “It’s bound to get colder here with the power out now.”
“And with how long you had your window open earlier,” he added. “The temperature is going to drop in here faster than it would have if you hadn’t helped me.”
You sighed, frowning in his general direction. “So much for being able to help you warm up,” you muttered. “Sorry.”
“No need to apologize,” he assured you.
It felt as if he was shifting on the couch nearby. Your brows knitted further together as you tried to make out what he was doing through the dark. All you could see was a faint mass of black that seemed darker than the rest of the blackness. Then moments later you felt a blanket being draped over your lap. 
“No, uh uh,” you said, shaking your head and immediately grabbing the blanket. “There’s two blankets, we can clearly share.”
“You’re freezing,” he countered. 
“And you’re not cold?” you shot back.
“Doesn’t matter, you’ve already been far kinder than I deserved this evening,” he replied.
You grabbed the blanket in your hands and stubbornly tossed it back in his general direction. An audible sigh sounded through the darkness to your left.
“You know I can just leave, right?” he told you. “Which would leave you with no reason to not use both blankets.”
Your eyes narrowed in the direction of the sound of his voice. “But then you’d be allowing more cold air into my apartment, which would only make the temperature drop faster in here,” you argued back. “Then I'd really be cold.”
He breathed out a laugh and you imagined the smile on his lips at the sound. You smiled triumphantly back at the dark shape of him because you knew you had a good point. Even though really, you could just layer on more clothes.
“Okay,” he relented. “That’s true. So how about…we share?”
The smile on your face quickly disappeared at his suggestion. Mouth dropping open, you felt your heart skip a beat in your chest. It took you a few seconds to regain the ability to respond.
“Share?” you asked.
“Body heat would certainly keep us both warmer,” he answered. “So would sharing two blankets instead of using only one.”
“Oh, uh, well,” you stammered, your mind racing at the thought of your body pressed up against his. “I–I–”
His deep laugh rumbled towards you through the darkness, the sound causing your lips to clamp shut. 
“I’m not suggesting anything immoral,” he assured you. “Simply a possible solution to the very real problem of us freezing in here. Unless, of course, you’d prefer me to leave?”
“No!” you exclaimed.
Immediately your eyes widened in horror at how quickly you’d responded to that. And judging by his chuckle, he’d also noticed, too. Your face scrunched up as you mentally scolded yourself for sounding so eager to keep him here in your apartment.
“Well in that case, we could share the blankets and our body heat,” he suggested again. “Because the temperature has definitely dropped a few degrees already and it's only going to continue if the power stays out.”
Nervously your tongue slid out, licking your lips. You were trying hard to control the racing of your heart, positive he could hear it with how hard it was beating now. Of course you weren’t going to pass up a chance to basically cuddle the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen for warmth during a snowstorm. You just needed to find a way to not sound so eager to accept his offer first.
“I suppose you…have a point there,” you said slowly, trying to keep your voice even. “That’s–that’s usually what people do in survival situations. Use their body heat to keep warm.”
An amused huff came from him and you realized he’d scooted even closer to you on the couch. Your breath caught in your throat the moment you felt his thigh bump against yours.
“So are we in agreement with sharing both blankets, then?” he asked.
“That–that appears to be the most logical solution to the problem,” you answered. “So yeah, I guess we…share the blankets.”
Despite the lack of light, the Devil seemed to move with ease and fluidity through the darkness, something you were paying close attention to as he gently sidled his way up against the side of you, managing to wrap both blankets around the pair of you. All the while you’d sat pin straight on the couch, aware that he was flush to your side from your shoulder all the way down to your knee. You clasped your hands in your lap, unsure of where else to place them. Truthfully, you had to admit you were already much warmer like this, with his body heat enveloping you beneath both blankets.
“Am I making you uncomfortable?” he asked, his tone far gentler than it had been all evening. “Because that's not my intention.”
“No,” you answered with a light shake of your head. “You're not.”
He chuckled softly, his body shaking yours slightly with the movement. Your head turned towards him and you wished you could see at least the part of his face that was visible right now.
“Then why are you so tense?” he questioned. 
“I'm not tense!” you lied.
He laughed again, this time louder. The movement jostled you somehow further into his side, though your hand flew out and landed flat on his very solid chest as you tried to stop yourself from falling further into him. Your eyes widened in horror yet again, but before you could push yourself away you felt his arm wrapping around your shoulders and allowing you to sink even more into him. Heat was very much creeping up your neck and reaching your cheeks now in embarrassment. 
“You're very tense actually,” he teased. “If you're uncomfortable I can move, but we aren't going to be sharing much body heat if you don't actually sit next to me.”
Slowly you removed your hand from his chest, lowering it to your lap. Though with the way you were sitting facing partially towards him now, your knuckles were brushing against his thigh. 
“I am not tense,” you grumbled. “And you aren't making me uncomfortable. This is just…awkward. I barely know you and you don't know me.”
“Okay,” he conceded. “How about since you've guessed a few things about me, I think it's only fair you tell me a few things about yourself now.”
“I told you I'm not very interesting,” you reminded him.
“Ah, well,” he replied with a shrug, “I think I'd like to decide that for myself.”
Biting your lip, you turned your burning face and buried it into his shoulder, glad he couldn't see how nervous he'd suddenly made you. It was hard to tell if he was flirting with you or if that was just his vigilante persona–when he wasn't beating people, of course. 
With your nose pressed against the fabric of his shirt, you noticed he smelled surprisingly good. There was the hint of his sweat, but there was also a faint clean detergent scent. You closed your eyes and tried to relax, inhaling a deep breath in. Even though he was still a stranger and a vigilante, he seemed kind and safe so far. And he also hadn't thrown you off of himself for getting even closer to him, either. Maybe you should just do what he seemed to be doing: relax and enjoy the unexpected cuddles tonight with an unexpected acquaintance. 
“Alright, what do you want to know?” you whispered, eyes still closed as you focused on his scent.
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Eyes fluttering open, you felt yourself waking from a deep, comfortable sleep. Though your eyes instantly snapped closed against the bright light that immediately assaulted them. Slowly you blinked them back open, trying to adjust to the surprising sunshine pouring through your living room window. Gradually you began to push yourself upright, realizing you were laying with your head on a couch pillow, both of your blankets snuggly wrapped around you. For a moment your face twisted into a look of confusion as you hesitated, staring down at the two blankets. Why had you been asleep on your couch?
But then flashes of last night came back to you. The masked man falling onto your fire escape. The joking and constant banter between the pair of you. Darkness when the power went out and the feel of his warm, muscular body wrapped around yours as he tried to keep you warm. The scent of clean detergent and his sweat. The feel of his spandex shirt against your fingertips and your cheek as you rested your head against his shoulder.
Had that all really happened? Or had you just fallen asleep on your couch and dreamt it?
Your attention shifted towards your coffee table and your sluggish brain processed the sight of your almost empty mug of tea, left abandoned all night, and an empty glass of water. Pushing yourself the rest of the way upright on the couch, your head turned over your shoulder. The lock on your living room window was undone.
The Devil of Hell’s Kitchen really had been in your apartment last night. Which meant the pair of you really had cuddled together for warmth when your power had gone out. And you really did meet him. At least, somewhat.
“Oh my God,” you breathed out in awe. “He was really here.”
But just as the rush of excitement at meeting someone you’d always secretly admired filled you, it quickly vanished. Because you must have fallen asleep on him sometime last night when the pair of you were talking, and then he must’ve slipped out of your apartment before the sun came up, probably when the power had come back on. Which made sense, considering he wouldn’t want to be seen sneaking back to his own apartment in such a conspicuous outfit. 
But what was upsetting you was the growing realization that it wasn’t just the first time you’d met him, but it would most likely be the last. And you’d gone and fallen asleep through part of that meeting.
Stupid stupid stupid.
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keehomania · 11 months ago
Text
frostbite (동상) ㅡ min yoongi (민윤기)
the second part can be found here
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✧.* 18+
“cold as ice, hard as stone, never choose men over being alone,” was what your mother had found herself repeating to you your entire life. maybe not your entire life, actually. you couldn't really remember when the phrase was spoken into life, perhaps when you had turned twelve, thirteen; when you began to develop and mature, when push-up bras began to substitute training bras, when makeup began to gain significance, when she had noticed how older and younger men alike had started to smirk and leer more and more shamefully whenever you passed by.
it wasn't because she had it out for you. quite the opposite, actually. it was something her mother had sang to her, an invention of her own she had sang to life when hormones began to work faster than she could blink. she thought it would raise awareness as a subtle way for her to let her daughter know that no man could ever be trusted in the slightest, but your mother didn't care to listen. it worked the first few years of her adolescence; she avoided relationships all throughout high school and college, but all good things come to an end. after she had graduated and gone into finance the way she had planned, things took a turn when she met your father. no one could have predicted the outcome. their relationship moved quickly, but smoothly. their friends had sworn up and down that they could never imagine them in an argument, until they got married. with marriage came a child, you. with a child came more responsibilities, with which came more money spent. they spent and spent until they had nothing left to spend, and that's when the verbal arguments had reached a new low.
by the time you had turned fifteen, you found yourself consoling your mother as much as she allowed you to. it was draining, you found yourself asking the man in the sky for a way out. a way out was in store, just not for you. one night, just a little after midnight, your father had packed his bags and left after another one of their more tense fights, swearing to find a younger, prettier, richer woman. you had both assumed it was another one of his empty threats, but you would never come to know, as that was the last time either of you have seen or heard from him.
for weeks on end following his departure, your mother had no tears left to cry. she was too quiet, white in the face as if all the blood has been drained from her body. she wasn't interested in discussing what had happened ever again. more weeks passed and winter came along, and she had fallen ill. you had picked up a job at fifteen and worked as many shifts as you could just to keep the house warm, to keep food on the table at least until december's weather had passed. she knew you had been trying, and you knew she was grateful, but you couldn't shake the uneasy feeling as her condition worsened, as did the weather.
blizzards were uncommon in daegu. sure, it was normal to wake up to over ten inches of snow, but the storms just never seemed to take action. that's why you were surprised to have woken up just half an hour past four in the morning, to the sound of ice pounding on your windows and vicious wind blowing. your room was on the second floor, completely untouched, and you felt relieved for just a second. that second quickly passed when you called out for your mother, only to be met with silence. maybe she didn't hear you, maybe she had mistaken your voice for the wind; it's what you so badly wanted to believe as you made your way down the stairs. your heart stopped when you had realized that hope was more than a call away.
despite the untouched stairs and floor above, the living room she had been sleeping in was a wreck. the air was noticably colder, windows broken, glass shattered on the wet floor. the storm had done all the damage, yet that still wasn't the worst part. your mother was still on the couch, her skin as pale as ever. she was facing the ceiling, eyes open. you felt your heart sink to your stomach, and you've been dreading the feeling ever since. you've carried the grief ever since it happened, tears stinging whenever november made an appearance, whenever the temperature shifted. your mother had frozen to death, and how could you ever get over it, how could you ever function? you dreaded your father more than anything, knowing that if she could've beared to sleep in their shared room on the floor above, she would've been alive.
that was the first moment you had taken her words to heart. cold as ice, hard as stone, never choose men over being alone.
you had made it through the rest of high school without any interest in dating, or men in general. you had graduated the way you pictured yourself graduating, and you did it alone. it was a lonely road before anything else, but it was something you learned to live with. you spent your last summer as a high school student working to kill the time, waiting for the college season to start. everyone from your class had gone their separate ways, but you couldn't care less. every day seemed the same—wake up, eat, work, come home, eat, sleep. you went to sleep dreading the night, and woke up dreading the day. on one particular day, a man had stopped you in your tracks on the way to work. all he had to say was, “wouldn't hurt to smile, would it?” all it did was put a scowl on your face.
when summer had finally come to an end, you were the most ecstatic you've been in in the last four years. you couldn't wait to leave the house you grew up in—sell it, rent it out, it didn't matter. all you wanted was out. you ended up renting it out to an anonymous customer, which definitely should've raised some alarms, but you couldn't care less. they needed the house, you needed the money; they could've turned it into a meth lab for all you cared.
daegu university was located on the other side of town. it was a good college, despite how far away it was, which meant it was worth the agonizing drive. it was almost cartoonishly big, big and urban. nothing less was to be expected of a private school with a low acceptance rate and big bills. you had met with the principal of the university a total of three times. the first time was to congratulate you for being accepted, which had taken you aback. it was the first time in a long time you had allowed yourself to grin from ear to ear. the second time was just a few days later, he had shown you around the campus in advance, to avoid any confusion when the halls were packed to the brim. the third and final time was to get you comfortable in your dorm, where you met your dorm roommate.
the school itself was filled with spoiled, conceited kids with little to no knowledge and extended trust funds. it truly was a sight for sore eyes in the worst way possible. often did you find yourself rolling your eyes at their remarks and complaints, it was incredible how they could be so out of touch with reality and out of sync with the real world. you couldn't keep up with the rich people bullshit—stained shoes, last season clothes, companies going bankrupt. just a month into college, you learned to tune everything out, nearly everything.
your roommate took the cake, and you knew it. you felt the last shreds of your patience go numb when you had first met him. for the sake of your education, you told yourself that having a guy as your roommate would be no issue. you didb't want to leave a sour taste in the principal's mouth, so you put on a smile and complied. all you had to do was ignore him, just as you had been doing your whole life. he was quiet when you had first met, he was quiet throughout the many times you had spotted him during lectures or lunch. min yoongi—out of his entire group of friends, he seemed to be the most tame. that had lasted until he grew more comfortable and less mindful of your presence.
awake at the peak of midnight, you typed away at your laptop. your forehead was slick with sweat, hair tied back as you focused on your presentation. yoongi had gone out, perhaps with his friends. the room was quiet, aside from the sound of the wind whistling from outside. the silence didn't last as long as you needed it to, however, your heart practically skipping a beat as the door swung open. you really could've sworn you had locked it, making a mental note to double-check from that point on. the room was dark, so you couldn't make out who had entered until the lights flickered on. the smell of soju was pungent as yoongi stumbled into the room, making your nostrils flare. you couldn't bite back the groan that left your mouth as he stumbled in, only because he wasn't entering alone, for the third night in a row. he had come in with another sorority girl, hand around her waist as their lips remained locked in a drunken dance, their feet tumbling over each other. yoongi waved you off as if to let you know he didn't give a shit, you could either stay and watch or leave, so you left for the third night in a row. you took your laptop with you and remained sat outside of the door, typing hastily while you prepared yourself for yet another night of listening to their ten minutes of pleasure.
while you continued to type away, you felt a tap on your shoulder. already pissed off, you bit back a hiss as you snapped your head to the side. greeted by your friend's smile, you were relieved you didn't snap at him. “shit, third night in a row? he's on a roll, isn't he?” kim taehyung was the first person that introduced himself to you, and on your first day, too. at first, you had no interest in being his friend, but quickly warmed up to him once you realized just how much you had in common. he was from bukgu, just like you. he liked the same things you did, but more importantly, disliked the same things as you—men and rich people. men, more or less—he cheered you on when you found yourself ranting about men and their behavior, even if he did it jokingly. his vendetta against the rich was what made him stick out, as he had gotten into the university due to his promising resumé, accepting a full scholarship. with that being said, he was always respectful towards you, treating you as a friend and nothing more.
“i don't know how you can stand to hang out with him,” you responded, typing away as he allowed himself to sit next to you, throwing a glance at the screen. “he's a good friend, don't sweat it,” he paused, a smile crossing his lips. “but i'm not dumb enough to live with him, fuck no.”
yoongi was all too quiet, even with his friends, but he made up for that with many habits that failed to please you. those habits ranged from chainsmoking to excessive drinking to the dehumanizing way he fucked every girl with two legs and a functioning mouth. shit, it didn't matter if the girls had two legs or three, he'd find a way to spread them as long as he was in the mood, but they'd never get a glance from him the next day, let alone a text back. he'd just move onto the next victim.
“you could hold me at gunpoint and i still wouldn't know what these girls see in him,” you scoffed. you really didn't know. sure, he was a good-looking guy, you weren't gonna go out of your way to lie and call him ugly, but nobody could be good-looking enough to risk your self-respect.
taehyung seemed like he was actually thinking about it for a second, the faint sound of moans and groans from behind the door adding to his brain fog, “i think he just has a really big dick, yeah?” you shot him a look, almost concerned, “you seem to do a lot of thinking about his dick, anything you wanna tell me?” you teased, earning a joking punch to the shoulder.
“how charming,” he sneered, all you could do was laugh. he paused for a second as the moans began to die down. “there is something i wanna ask you, though.”
you stopped your typing, peeling your eyes off the screen in order to face him. “yeah, go ahead.” he seemed hesitant, a nervous smile crossing his face, and you couldn't help but worry about what was to come. “you can't say no right away, you have to hear me out,” he was only making it worse. “i'm supposed to go to this kid's frat party tomorrow night, and i wanna bring a guest, yeah?”
your face couldn't help but twist up in pure confusion. it wasn't that you were a total stone cold bitch that was gonna leave him high and dry, but you had never been to a party in your life. “and out of all the potential victims in this school, you wanna go with me?” he nodded, almost eagerly, as if the answer was supposed to be obvious. “duh, who else am i supposed to go with?” you could've inquired, but you didn't dare argue back, you didn't have the patience to. instead, you waited a second before agreeing. you didn't have to stay overnight, just a couple hours to keep taehyung company.
“okay, yeah, come to the dorm and we'll go, what time is it?” you asked as you closed your laptop, the painful silence from behind the door being a good enough sign that you could come back in. “i'll come by around eight, thanks for this, i owe you one.” you nodded as he gave you a hug goodbye, watching as he scurried down the hall and back to his own dorm.
you let out a sigh of exasperation, hand sliding down your face as the realization hit you. you didn't know the first thing about social gatherings, let alone about the ones with wannabe elite socialities that'll have too much to drink. the thought made your stomach churn as you reached for the doorknob, but before you could open the door, you had been beaten to it.
from the other side, the girl yoongi had brought to the dorm had swung the door open, stopping in her tracks as she locked eyes with you. she was a pretty girl, but the look she gave you was enough to make your blood boil. she didn't say a word, but the look itself was so nasty, you felt as dirty as she did. as she stomped away, you could hear the sound of yoongi's laughter from the room. “feisty one, isn't she?” he asked as you finally came in, making sure to lock the door this time. “charming girl, you sure know how to pick them,” you rolled your eyes.
he turned to face you as you walked in, wearing nothing but his short as he made himself comfortable, pressing a cigarette to his lips. the look you threw him was incredible, almost mimicking the one tonight's vencido shot you just a few seconds prior. “do you really have to smoke that shit in here?” you asked as he lit the tip of it. he raised an eyebrow, as if offended. “you got lung cancer?” the question had little to no relevance, but you shook your head. “then, what's the problem?”
“it smells like shit,” you hissed, waving your hand at the smoke drifting in your direction. he couldn't help but chuckle as he made his way over to the sofa, kicking his feet over the side. “hold your breath, open a window if you have to.” you scoffed as you watched his eyes close, cigarette tucked between his lips. you opened both of the windows in the room, greeting with fresh air with open arms. it was the last thing you had said to one another before you went to sleep, physically too tired to argue any further.
the following morning came too quickly, the sunlight from the window that had been, once again closed, practically blinding you, even while your eyes were closed. you could barely open them, head groggy as you powered through it. despite the bright rays, it wasn't what you saw that had awoken you from your slumber, but what you had heard.
it was about seven in the morning, maybe a few minutes last seven. whatever time it was, you knew it was too early to be listening to whatever it was you were listening to. you could make out two loud voices; one was yoongi's, the other belonged to a girl. for a second, your blood ran cold at the thought of him hooking up with a girl while you were awake, but the fear went away as your vision began to clear up. they were both half-naked; not fucking, just arguing.
“you're a fucking asshole, you've always been a fucking asshole,” the girl yelled, voice piercing your ears. you could make her frame out, definitely wasn't any of the past three girls that came in. she was much smaller than yoongi, her fists pounding against his chest but to avail as she continued to yell and cry. “you think fucking my best friend is funny, asshole? or the other sluts you have in here every fucking night? or the whore in your bed at seven in the morning?”
you scrunched your face up, offended at the assumption, but you remained in your position, not wanting them to notice your presence in case the situation worsened. “you better watch that fucking mouth of yours,” you heard yoongi respond. he didn't yell at her, he didn't hit back. his voice was almost stoic. “she's not a fucking whore, she's my roommate and she's sleeping, so either be quiet or get the fuck out.” you were almost pleased with his answer, it was the closest thing you'd ever get to him being nice to you. unfortunately, she didn't like that answer at all.
“get fucked, you son of a bitch,” was the last thing she said before leaving, and she didn't go quietly. she left the dorm with heavy footsteps and a deafening slam of the door. yoongi paused, reaping the insult with only a second of eerie calmness. when the wave of calm had passed, you felt your body jolt as he threw the television's remote control at the door, muttering a string of angry curses as he did so. only then did he turn around, watching the way you stared in surprise.
he tilted his head back down, almost as if he felt sorry, “sorry if i woke you up, go back to bed.” you shook your head, pushing the blanket off as you swung your legs off the bed. it was much too late to go back to sleep anyway. “all good, i gotta get to class anyway.” he raised an eyebrow, leaning against the counter as he pressed another cigarette to his lips. you watched him light it up in shock, it was still seven in the morning.
“what the fuck kind of classes do you have this early?” you rolled your eyes as you brushed out your hair, getting done only what was necessary before leaving for your morning lecture. “management accounting,” you murmured a response. he raised his eyebrows, keeping his distance as he blew smoke into the air.
“studying finance, really?” you nodded in response, unable to tell if he was impressed or disgusted. “that's cool,” he said softly. “my step-dad studied finance, too. says it's a pain in the ass.”
perhaps you had were too comfortable in that moment, perhaps you were just too tired and out of it to register what was coming out of your mouth. “my mom studied finance, she was really good at it,” your eyes had locked, but only for a second. it wasn't long enough to carry too much significance, but not short enough to go unnoticed. you coughed, “i'm gonna go to class.” he nodded silently, watching you grab what you needed before heading towards the door. he watched you leave for your lecture, cigarette still pressed to his lips, but not before opening the window.
your classes had lasted longer than you had anticipated, the one hour mark stretching for another two hours. by the time you had finally finished, you felt the second wave of exhaustion flood your system. the morning wasn't even through, and you were ready to give up and go back to bed, but you couldn't. as you left the classroom, dreading whatever your schedule had in store for you next, you felt an arm sling around your shoulders as you walked down the hallway.
“hey, loser,” taehyung cooed in your ear, ruffling your hair as you scoffed, delivering a playful slap to his arm. “going to your morning classes like a good little geek, aren't you?” you rolled your eyes as you peeked at your schedule, smiling as you realized your next class was with your friend. “remember those words when you're working for me in ten years, jackass.”
he feigned offense as he placed his hand on his forehead in a dramatic fashion. “so so cruel, i would truly rather work at a gas station.” you couldn't help but laugh as you both made your way into the next classroom. you couldn't help but admire how elegant the classrooms were, truly a hit or miss product of capitalism. unfortunately, you weren't given much time to admire as you both stopped in your tracks in the middle of the room.
“min yoongi taking english literature,” taehyung was the first to react, equally as surprised as you were. he laughed as he walked up to his friend, who was seated in the back row, arms crossed with a faint smile on his face. “you do realize the class doesn't come with a free ashtray, right?” you faintly trailed behind him as they dapped each other up, the most unnecessary display of masculinity, you thought.
“yeah, don't be too shocked, my parents aren't paying for me to smoke all day,” yoongi responded. his faint smile grew more and more faint as he watched you come up behind taehyung. his gaze switched from you to him. “you two friends?”
you had opened your mouth to say something along the lines of “none of your fucking business,” but your friend was much quicker than you. taehyung wrapped his arm around your shoulders once more, ruffling your hair as you protested. “(y/n)? no, she's my hostage, as you can see.” you sighed in defeat, knowing it was no use. “you're such an ass,” you hissed. yoongi didn't say a word, he just stared. his gaze continued to flicker, but he remained quiet. even as you found your seat next to taehyung, just across from yoongi, he stayed quiet. silent, though his gaze never left the two of you, and you could almost feel it.
morning classes seemed to be the last of your problems as the day went on. everything was normal until you returned to your dorm, the panic you had been fighting since last night finally settling as you checked the time. you had exactly an hour to get ready before taehyung would come to pick you up. exactly an hour to find an outfit, put some decent makeup on, and get the courage to not pussy out. yoongi was nowhere to be found as you entered the dorm.
your wardrobe wasn't necessarily limited, as you had brought everything that could fit you. anything that couldn't was given to charity before you rented out the house, it was the smartest thing to do. you kept everything in a narrow closet, alongside some jewellry your mother had kept in a dainty box. it was a weird sensation, even after so many years, running your fingers through the fabric would never not strain your heart. you gulped back the melancholic nostalgia as you raked through the clothes. finally, you pulled out a dress hanging from above, one that had caught your eye.
it was anything unlike you had ever worn, because it wasn't yours. it was a dress your mother had worn when she was just a bit younger than you. despite what she believed in, she was the life of the party, unlike you. she knew how to let loose, and she wasn't afraid to express herself through her clothes. the dress was almost skimpy, she loved giving men the wrong impression. she loved knowing they could look because, they'd be looking either way, but they could never have her. she was in control, and the dress was gorgeous. a gold dress with thin straps, entirely tight and made to hug the body of whoever chose to wear it. it wasn't what you were used to, not at all. you loved the fact that it was pretty, but you loved the fact that your mother felt pretty in it even more.
if it wasn't her dress, you were entirely sure you wouldn't have liked it. the sensation of putting it on and embracing it was even weirder than the feeling of finding it. nonetheless, you slipped into the dress as you stood in front of the mirror. the dress was even more beautiful on you rather than in your hands. it was just as you imagined—tight, hugging every part of your body from your chest to your thighs, but beautiful. the light from the room did it more than enough justice, it glimmered.
even as you did your makeup, you couldn't help but give all your attention to the dress. it made you feel warm on the inside, the fact that you had a part of your mother clinging to your skin. it was as if she had never left. when you finished, with your face touched up, the heels you wanted, and the gold ring on your finger, all you could do was admire the dress in the mirror.
“holy shit,” were the words that finally snapped you back to reality, your body jolting as your head turned to the source of the sound. you hated how bad your instincts were when you were distracted, it was one of the reasons why taehyung could tease you as much as he did without you reacting. you froze, not knowing what to do.
“shit, i didn't mean to scare you, i'm sorry,” yoongi continued. he was equally as frozen as you were, having stopped himself in his tracks as he stared at you, eyes scanning you from head to toe. “it's just that you look really nice. the dress is—really nice.”
you almost felt bad for staying quiet. it wasn't that you were ungrateful, you just didn't know what to say. for a moment amidst your silence, yoongi continued to admire you for a moment longer, turning on his heel when he realized you had gone mute. “wait,” you practically blurted out, stopping him in his tracks once more. “thank you. it was my mom's.”
he didn't turn back around, but he remained in place as he felt his heart tighten at your words. “doesn't fit her anymore?” his tone was almost hopeful, as if he was hoping that would be the case. you went quiet for a second, before the answer came out entirely too quickly, as if you had thrown it up. “it would've if she was still here. she passed away, few years ago.”
you regret it the second it had come out, but that was the thing about word vomit; just like regular vomit, you could never take it back. now, it was his turn to be silent. you were entirely sure that you had creeped him the fuck out, but he felt that it was far from that. his heart tightened, it wasn't the answer he was hoping for. he responded as he turned around, finally facing you. “i'm sorry,” he murmured. “my dad passed away some years back, too. storm was bad.” he had mentioned his step-father, but never his actual dad. you felt for him, and he felt for you.
you opened your mouth, ready to offer some form of support, but the distinct pounding on the door was quick to cut you off. “come in,” yoongi muttered out, loud enough for whoever it was to here. taehyung wasted no time opening the door, practically cheering as he came in, unable to read the room.
“is my hostage ready?” his voice had dropped a few octaves as he neared the end of the question, walking into the room as he locked eyes with you. it was something about you in the dress rather than the dress itself, and yoongi was quick to notice his reaction.
“what're you doing here?” he asked taehyung, fighting back the urge to roll his eyes at his shell-shocked reaction. for a second, he focused. “i'm here for (y/n), we're going to the wang party.” never had you heard of that name in your life.
yoongi raised an eyebrow before turning back to you. “you didn't say you were going to jackson wang's shitty frat party,” he sounded almost displeased. you shrugged, “what's it to you?” you and taehyung exchanged a glance as yoongi scoffed, the agitation expanding.
“his entire frat has a thing for roofies and rape,” he paused to shoot taehyung a look. “but i'm sure your friend already told you about that.”
it was your turn to shoot taehyung a look, who already had his hands up. “you really think i'd let something happen to her?” he asked, his tone slightly colder than usual. yoongi scoffed at the rhetorical question, “go on, then,” was all he uttered out.
you knew you didn't need any help, and that you were perfectly capable of handling yourself, which included the decisions you made. still, it didn't change the fact that leaving the dorm held more tension than it was supposed to. taehyung shut the door as you left, leaving yoongi in distress that he chose not to make obvious. instead, he chose to ignore the way it nagged him as he turned the television on, hoping it would just go away.
“roofies and rape? you guys are such a fucking cliché,” you muttered as you made your way down the hall with your friend. as oblivious as you were, for taehyung, it was a blessing, because you failed to notice the glances sent your way. he thought you were gorgeous, he thought the dress was gorgeous, up to the point where he could barely register what you were saying. “okay, yeah, ignore yoongi. i told you, i'm not gonna let anything happen, no way.” you knew he wouldn't, but you couldn't shake the feeling of unease as taehyung knocked on the door. the way yoongi acted, the way he talked, it was such a drastic and quick shift.
the generic music and cheers weren't audible until the door opened, you began wondering who you had to ask to get a thick door like that for some very necessary sound blockage. the guy who opened the door was familiar, you were sure you had seen him around campus before. “what's up, jackson?” they greeted each other with a laugh before the guy turned to you, with an almost unsettling spark in his eyes as he did so.
“good to see you, tae,” he spoke a little louder in order to combat the loud music. “and who do we have here?” the flickering colorful lights lit up the room, and you could make out what seemed to be hundreds of people in there, much to your disbelief. there was no logical reason for there to be that many people at one dorm party.
you introduced yourself, a friendly but equally forced smile on your face. “yeah, you're yoongi's roommate, aren't you?” you nodded in response, and you could tell that jackson wasn't too pleased with your roommate. “we should get you a drink then, make it easier to deal with him.” you feinged a laugh as you agreed, shooting taehyung a desperate look. you didn't need to say anything as you followed jackson in, your friend has already burned holes in the back of his head with his glare.
“i'll get us drinks, is that cool?” he could've sworn he saw jackson's face flash with disappointment, but the host obliged, nonetheless. you knew it was the best way for you to not get your virginity taken by the proclaimed roofie rapist, but you couldn't help but panic as taehyung left, even if it was for a good cause.
everybody was a sweaty, drunk mess. the party had started a mere fifteen minutes ago, yet the dorm was packed to the brim with careless, leering students looking to blow some steam off. you found yourself with your pressed against the wall as you created as much distance as possible. “i'm guessing it's your first frat party,” jackson said, only a few feet away from you. you avoided eye contact as best as you could, though you could barely hear him. “first party in general,” you corrected him. “not really my type of scene.”
he chuckled as he closed a few inches of distance off between you two. “that's what i figured,” you quite literally had nowhere to go, with the wall pressing into your back. “must be why you came with your boyfriend, right?” you laughed, but it wasn't in a mocking way, as if you had taken slight offense. “no, taehyung's not my boyfriend, i don't do boyfriends.” you made sure to put emphasis on the last bit.
jackson raised his eyebrows, taking a mere step closer as the lights flashed. he wasn't an unattractive guy, but you needed to take caution. “all the girls here tend to come with their boyfriends,” he gestured towards the many couples easily spotted behind him, all of them a sweaty mess of hormones, grinding and kissing without a care in the world. “rumor's going around that i'm not a nice guy, so they wanna be careful,” you couldn't tell if he was covering his tracks or not, but he was too close to your face, and the alcohol on his breath was no consolation. “what about you? you think i'm a nice guy?”
you couldn't tell if he was being serious or not, and you truly didn't know how to answer. his eyes bored into yours as a smirk played on your face, your mouth open but no word vomit. before you could waste another second thinking, you glanced at his side, watching taehyung stride over with two drinks, as if on time.
“here you go,” he broke the silence, and relief washed over you. once again, jackson attempted to mask his disappointment with a smile. taehyung handed you a glass of something clear, strong. you knew it was strong, whatever it was, but the tension was so cruel, you couldn't help but down the contents of the cup, as if to ease how unsettled you felt.
whatever it was left a disgusting taste in your mouth, almost like nail polish. your friend watched you, almost concerned, while jackson let out a laugh. “i have a feeling it isn't your first time,” a comment that earned him a glare and a half. you shook your head, “i'm not a drinker,” you argued. “but i'll take more of it.”
this time, taehyung pulled you to his side. “great idea, let's go,” he urged, earning him the third look of disappointment of the night, but he paid no mind. he knew that no reaction, was the best reaction. a frown formed on your face as he dragged you through the tight crowd, leading you to the coolers on the wooden table. he shot you a look, “stay away from jackson,” was all he said as he passed you another drink, this time, a can from the cooler. something less strong to kill the burning sensation in your throat. all you could do was nod.
by the time you had gotten your fair share of drinks down your system, the atmosphere around you began to shift drastically. it was less tense, more refreshing. the more lightheaded you felt, the easier it was to let loose. the worse your vision had become, the more flushed you felt as your blood pumped. you had left taehyung's side, the succumbing to the foreign feeling as you joined the crowd despite his calls of disapproval. you knew he'd come after you, but you didn't care. all you could focus on was absolutely nothing. you just liked the way it felt, swaying to the music as if nothing mattered. unfortunately, everything mattered, and not everyone was as unaware as you were. jackson watched you from the sidelines, and he was focused, despite the many drinks that were clashing in his system. he couldn't not focus on you.
as the night wore on, situations varied. in one dorm, the music was loud. the flashing lights provided no sanctuary, and the drinks were practically freezing despite the immense heat. in one dorm, everybody was having a fantastic time. in another dorm, the silence was deafening.
yoongi had put out what may have been his final cigarette of the night. his throat had grown tight, and his stomach had started to churn. he knew it wasn't because of the cigarettes, no. he had put so many of them out just to ease the aching concerns in his mind as he watched the clock tick. a minute had past, followed by an hour. then, another hour. by the time the box was empty, it was almost midnight, and he couldn't think. with his fingers intertwined, nose pressed against them, he let out a sigh. why were you still there? why hadn't you come back yet? did something happen? it was all he could think about. it wasn't that he cared, he just didn't want anything to happen to you; it'd put his reputation in a tough spot, seeing as you were his roommate and all. at least, that's what he wanted to believe in.
the sound of the clock ticking was almost mocking, as was the way the hand moved in the slowest fashion possible. when another fifteen minutes had passed, he glanced at the door, hoping he'd see you stumble in. maybe not sober, but alive and untouched. when the last speck of hope faltered, he found himself pulling his weight off the couch. “fuck this,” he practically spat, snatching the door keys off the drawer before making his way out.
you were unaware of what was happening behind the door, outside of your makeshift sanctuary. you had finally reached the point of betrayal, only then could you see why you had avoided alcohol for so long. as your head span, so did the room. the burning sensation in the pit of your stomach had quickly replaced the short-lived euphoria you had felt up until then. as your dancing faltered, you found yourself tumbling in the opposite direction, practically tripping over your own two feet.
before you could cause yourself any harm, you felt a familiarly unfamiliar touch embrace your waist, preventing you from falling onto your back. for a second, everything went quiet, relief coursing through your veins. the relief was as short-lived as the bliss. “caught you just in time, didn't i?” you heard jackson murmur, his breath hot against your ear. your vision was blurry, and you were slurring your words as if you had a lisp. you didn't want him to know how drunk you were, you didn't want him to take advantage of it, but he was no fool. “yeah, thanks'o much,” he only chuckled in response.
in an attempt to pull yourself away from him, you found yourself staring at him face-to-face, as his grip never left your waist. you could barely make out his figure, let alone muster the strength to run away. your mouth was open, but it was as if your brain was too slow to form any sentences. “feel bad, don't you?” his voice was soft, almost comforting but borderline mocking. all you could do was nod. “we should go, get you taken care of. my friend's gotta spare room, yeah?”
your hands were pressed up against his chest, as if in attempt to push away from him, but no force was emitted. under any other circumstances, you'd have had no problem leaving, but things just weren't playing in your favor. he smirked, leaning in towards your face as his hot breath fanned your neck, nose grazing the side of your jaw. you pressed your eyes shut, hoping it would all go away, but it never did.
“it's a shame your friend left you here,” he practically purred in your ear. his fingers grazed your collarbone as his free hand slid down your hip, reaching to cup your ass as he let out a sigh at the feeling. “pretty thing like you, nothing good's bound to happen, right?” you couldn't fight back. for the first time in forever, you couldn't fight back, and you hated it. you hated how you were at his disposal, there for him to use without a care in the world. you kept your eyes shut, still hoping it would all stop and go away. and finally, it did.
it didn't go away quietly—within seconds, you could feel a tight grip ripping you away from jackson, a force so aggressive, you felt your heart stop for a split second. you felt as if you didn't need to second-guess who it was, thinking taehyung had finally located you and came to your rescue, but your suspicions were denied once you turned around. “what the fuck is wrong with you?” despite being free from his grasp, jackson's yell made you wince. he came closer once more, but he didn't face you this time.
yoongi came just as close as he did, mere inches away from his face as he levelled with him. “dunno, jackson, she looks pretty drunk to me,” he sneered in his face. you were behind yoongi, with one of his arms pressing into your front in an attempt to block the distance between you and jackson. by that point, the music had started to falter, and people were growing more and more interested in the scene that was unfolding. “you can take the roofies and rape bullshit somewhere else, i'll fucking kill you and you know it.”
for a second, jackson almost seemed hesitant to react, as if he was scared of the man in front of him. that second passed, but it didn't go unnoticed before he chose his next words, “i should leave my bullshit here and fuck her 'till she's sober, in case you wanted to watch.” had he chosen anything else to say, maybe the situation wouldn't have escalated the way it did so fast. because, in one swift motion, jackson plummeted into the ground beneath his feet, his neck bending backwards in an almost animated way as yoongi's fist collided with the bottom of his jaw.
“holy shit,” was all you could breathe out, screams emitting from the crowd of people behind you as you watched jackson's bloody gums shine under the lights. your body told you to move forward, pressing into yoongi's arm as you took a step towards jackson. the man beside you almost instantly looked back at you as he pushed you off with just enough force to make you stumble back.
for a second, you and yoongi locked eyes. your eyebrows furrowed, a look of concern in your eyes mixed with the profound melancholy of a lack of thoughts. your brain was moving too slow, you thought you looked stupid, but he thought you looked beautiful. it pissed him off how beautiful you looked, and it was all you could see in his eyes. anger, anger, anger. anger, and a speck of something else that you couldn't quite figure out.
“you've gotta be fucking joking,” your head snapped towards the source of the sound, and you spotted taehyung rushing to your side. first, all of his anger was directed towards jackson, but the anger quickly shifted to your roommate once he realized jackson had been dealt with. “where do you get off shoving her?” yoongi scoffed at the question, watching the way your friend came up to you from behind, his annoyingly protective hands cupping your shoulders as he watched you, hoping to see you were okay.
“where do you get ditching her in a place like this?” was yoongi's response. everything went quiet, too quiet, as he and taehyung locked eyes. you were afraid, too afraid that your friend would end up in the same position as jackson. “it's crowded, i went to the bathroom and couldn't find her,” taehyung's defense was reasonable, as you had given him permission to go, promising you'd be fine for a minute or so before making your way to the dance floor. yoongi laughed, but there was no humor to be traced, “that's funny seeing as i found her the second i came in here.”
the silence physically made your stomach twist, and they could both see it from the way your abdomen clenched as you bent forward. people had started whipping their phones out, snapping photos ane taking videos as hushed whispers began to fill the air. “let's get you out of here,” taehyung murmured, ignoring what yoongi said as to avoid any further discomfort, but you knew yoongi. everybody knew him. as your friend pulled you by one arm, leading you towards the exit, you both stopped in your tracks. from your other side, yoongi kept his grip on your hand tight. you couldn't fully grasp the situation, but his unfamiliar touch had a different feeling than jackson's. they were both foreign, but only one was welcomed.
“go home, taehyung,” yoongi uttered out, and oncr again, they locked eyes. the tension was palpable, and you couldn't stand the way their cold gazes matched one another so well. when taehyung's eyes left his, they met yours. you wanted to go home so bad, the situation was killing you from the inside. so, you held his gaze and nodded. he let out a sigh as he let your arm go, ever so hesitantly. “i'll call you,” was what he said before he finally turned on his heel. yoongi practically sneered—“no, you won't,” was what he so badly wanted to say.
the morning which had followed was no easier than the previous night. you couldn't remember the last time you felt so sore, the pounding in your head never seeming to ease. you blinked, more than what was deemed natural, as you opened your eyes to the blinding sunlight. you could hear your roommate, but had yet to see him. “weather's getting colder,” was what you could make out as you propped yourself onto your elbows. “enjoy the sun while it lasts.” unfortunately, he had a point. you stopped straining your eyes, allowing the sunlight to do its work. now, you could see him, standing next to the open window with a cigarette in his hand.
“what time is it?” you asked, exhaustion laced in your voice as your brain had begun picking up the pieces of last night's rezendevous. “about ten,” your head snapped, realizing you had missed two of your morning classes. “but don't even think about going anywhere.” you looked up to meet his gaze as he blew smoke out the window.
your whole body was tense, and only when you stepped out from under the covers did you realize just how right he was about the weather. “why's it so fucking cold?” you couldn't help but ask, the borderline freezing weather leaving a sour taste in your mouth. “it's almost winter,” yoongi responded, just as dryly. “fucking hate winter.” you let out a humorless laugh, as if to agree. if there was one thing to agree on, it was that.
your phone vibrated on your desk, and as you peered over to see who had been bugging you so early in the morning, taehyung's face flashed on the screen once more. “so annoying,” yoongi spoke once more. “he's been doing that all morning.” you shot him a look as you scurried to pick up your phone, “and you didn't think to answer him?” you asked, watching him take the last drag of his cigarette. he shrugged you off, earning an eye roll as you finally picked up taehyung's call.
“thank god, everything okay?” you heard his panicked voice from the other side, before even getting a chance to greet him. “yeah, just woke up,” you murmured, your heart pounding as you recalled just how bad it had gotten the night prior. you could recall the drinks, the lights, jackson. most importantly, you could recall yoongi, and how he had rushed in, potentially stopping you from getting assaulted. the phone was pressed against your ear as you looked up to meet his eyes once more. from the way he looked at you, you knew he recalled it just as well. because, he looked at you as if he wanted nothing to happen to you.
“i'm really sorry for leaving, i should've held it in a little longer,” your friend's apologetic voice rang once more. you shook your head as if he was there, but your eyes never left yoongi's, “no. tae, it's alright. it would've happened either way, it's not your fault.” you could've sworn yoongi's gaze dropped at the mention of his name, but either way, the eye contact had finally broken. you spoke to your friend a minute longer, dismissing his apologies and promising you'd see each other for lunch. he wanted you to spend it with him and his friends, seeing as that would be much safer than being alone. you complied.
when you finally hung up, you allowed yourself to face reality once more. “there's advil in the cabinet,” yoongi spoke. this time, his tone was colder than anticipated. you thanked him, allowing yourself to get ready for whatever it was the universe had in store for you.
by the time lunch had rolled around, you found yourself waiting for your friend once more. this time, for a much safer setting. taehyung and his friends normally spent that period outside, taking up a bench or two while they hung out. as you walked with him, you could feel just how unfamiliar and harsh the air had grown. he noticed your discomfort, but said nothing, as you were near the spot anyway.
you couldn't recognize any of his friends. sure, you had seen them around campus. maybe even in a class or two, but you knew none of them personally. all but one. as you walked up to the bench, yoongi was the last to notice you, but the first to meet your gaze. “this is (y/n), she's gonna be joining us today,” taehyung introduced you, and you forced a smile. the smile was returned as the boys introduced themselves, all but one. yoongi remained silent, but never took his eyes off you. all of the boys were locals, all from daegu, but all of them seemed to harbor the same personality as taehyung, regarding the rich people bullshit. they seemed nice, down-to-earth, until the questions rolled in.
“you were at that party last night, weren't you?” one of the boys, who had introduced himself as dongwon, asked. though hesitant, you nodded, earning a sound of astonishment from him. “yeah, jackson's a real asshole. he didn't put his hands on you, did he?” you tensed up at the thought, with dongwon earning a look of disapproval from taehyung. you weren't the only one uncomfortable—from the corner of your eye, you could see yoongi fidget with his fingers, perhaps at the mention of what went down last night.
“no, not really,” you responded, recalling the way he had you backed up against the wall, the way his fingers so desperately waited for further access beside your waist. “not really?” dongwon repeated, as if confused. “what exactly do you mean by that?”
you shrugged, as if hesitant to go into further detail. “he didn't get to do much touching, nothing too bad,” you paused, watching the way nearly all of them listened carefully. “tried to kiss me, had his hand on my ass but that's really all—” before you could finish your thought, everybody's attention shifted to yoongi, who had pushed himself off the bench and onto his feet, throwing his can into the bin behind him more aggressive than necessary. “yoongi, what's your deal—” once again, you found yourself being cut off by the same man. once he was on his feet, his grip was on your elbow, practically dragging you away from the group and back into the school.
you thrashed, but it was no use, you couldn't pull yourself out of his grasp. he was too strong and too determined, as he pulled you into the first empty hallway he could find. once he had found the spot, you found yourself in an all too familiar position, with your back pressed against the wall. “what the fuck is wrong with you?” you hissed, but your voice was weaker than usual. you didn't know if it was because of last night's antics, or because of the current tension. “what's wrong with me?” he repeated, tone equally as harsh. “where do you get off talking about shit like that?”
now, you were just confused. “what the hell are you talking about? he asked me a question.” yoongi rolled his eyes, you truly had no idea why he was so mad. especially at you, what was it that you said wrong? “why didn't you call me when he touched you?” this time, his tone was more gentle, and the confusion had been replaced with shock. “if i had come in a second later,” he stopped himself mid-sentence, not wanting to imagine just how much the situation could have escalated.
your face softened at his words, it was almost like he felt guilty for not having stopped you when he had the chance. “you came,” you said. “you came, and i'm grateful you did.” your words comforted him, just a little bit. in the end, the important part was that someone intervened. even if it happened to be your roommate. for a moment, you saw him smile, but perhaps it was too much. he knew it was, so he followed it up with an eye roll, “it was a pain in the ass, had to watch over you, missed breakfast and lunch and everything,” he paused, as if the lightbulb in his head came to light. “you owe me lunch.”
you owed him lunch, and it took every cell in you to avoid ripping his head off his neck. it was the least you could do, it really was. it wasn't like you didn't know how to cook, of course you did. it was one of the first things your mother had made sure she taught you on time. but it was something about the almost smug smile he was wearing as he made himself comfortable on the chair, while you whisked away by the stove. “and don't even think about poisoning it,” you heard his taunting voice from behind. “the death penalty's legal now.”
for a moment, you even considered it. you opted for one of your mother's recipes, seeing as your roommate wasn't specific with what he wanted. truly, he didn't care. he just wanted to eat, with the appetizer being an excuse to fuck around with you. the specific recipe you were using had been passed around from one generation, all the way to your mother. the stew itself was something anyone could make, but nobody could make it the way your did. in fact, it was so special, the only people she ever shared it with were you and your father.
“it smells good,” yoongi murmured, his eyes glued to your frame as you carefully removed the pot off the stove, turning the heat off. you smiled to yourself as you retrieved a bowl from the csbinet above, “thanks.” never had you tried the recipe out for yourself, it was your first time and you were determined to make it work.
he waited patiently as you scooped the stew out, dumping it into the bowl. he watched your every move, from the way you pushed the loose strands of your hair away from your forehead, to how you carried the bowl with grace he swore was there. the stew was served with a bowl of rice for him, and a side of radishes. you heaved a sigh as you sat next to him, hands sore. everything was there, picture perfect for him, but he kept his focus on you.
“well,” you urged. “go on, then.” only then did his gaze drop. he stared at the red liquid, allowing the spicy scent to grace his nostrils. it was comforting, and all too familiar to him. the scent itself sent a sharp jab to his chest, he was too familiar with it.
his suspicions didn't ease as he scooped a spoonful of the stew, he had reached a new level of excitement. you analyzed him carefully, hoping for a promising reaction. it was exactly what you were going to get. “holy shit,” he uttered out, his mouth full. his instincts hadn't failed him, the scent was familiar and the taste only confirmed what he had been thinking. “is this your recipe?” for a second, you hesitated, but shook your head. “no,” you assured softly. “it was my mother's, why? is it any good?”
the answer itself was all too obvious as he continued to fill his mouth with the product, swallowing within seconds just to help himself some more. it was as if he hadn't eaten in years. “it's amazing,” he praised, and your face lit up. you couldn't help but smile as he neared the end of the bowl. “it tastes exactly the one my step-dad used to make.” you were skeptical, as there was no way that was possible, but took the compliment.
“generational recipe,” you explained, a twinge of grief to your voice. “it was all we ate when winter came along.” the memories weren't as pleasant as the taste itself; you found yourself recalling the days there truly wasn't anything else to eat, but you never complained. you never got tired of the taste.
yoongi seemed to notice the way your tone shifted, even while draining what was left of the meal. “i get it,” was what he found himself saying. at first, you thought it was just empty comforting. “the cold took a toll on us, too. fucking hate the winter.” out of all people, you never imagined opening up to min yoongi, let alone him opening up to you. let alone him understanding you. for a second, there was nothing but silence, and the way you found yourself staring at him. you had been looking at him with the same eyes since you've met him, but this time was different. this time, you looked at each other in a way you never have before.
in a split second, the moment had passed. your phone had started to ring again, and you found yourself cursing whoever it was. taehyung, probably. you swore you'd kill him if it was him pestering you again, but it wasn't. your screen flashed, reading “no caller id” in white, bold letters. yoongi shot you a concerning glance going unnoticed as you excused yourself, leaving the room.
once you were a room away from yoongi, you answered the call with a simple, “hello?” you didn't know exactly what you were expecting to hear, nor who. maybe someone had the wrong number, or it was a spam caller. you had your list of possibilities and expectations, all but one. “(y/n)? is it you?” the voice on the other line was deep, scratchy, rough. above all else, it was familiar. the second you heard it, your blood ran cold and your heart grew weak. it had never crossed your mind, so you refused to believe it was happening. “yes,” you responded weakly, weary of your roommate in the other room. “who is this?”
in the back of your mind, you knew exactly who it was. you could see his face, and you could hear his voice. you had done your best, for years on end, to block it from your memory, but to no avail. “(y/n), you know exactly who this is,” he said, voice all but steady. your fingers quivered, breathing heavy as you did your best to keep it together. “please, sweetheart. i'm back at the house, where's your mother? where are you? come over, we have to talk.” and for a split second, the room was silent. you couldn't muster up the words you so badly needed to say, not while you blood was hot, not while your head was heavy. the shock had finally turned to anger, and you couldn't deal with it.
“you asshole,” you finally breathed out, your eyes stinging with tears that threatened to spill. “you have some fucking nerve, you asshole.” it was all that was going through your head—asshole, asshole, asshole. how could he possibly have the courage, after so long?
from the other line, your father heaved a sigh, as if symapthetic. almost as if he was ashamed. “honey, i know i'm the last person you wanna hear from right now—” you had reached your limit, patience growing thin. you knew being rational wasn't an option, not with your knees threatening to give out from under you. “she's dead, you son of a bitch,” your voice was barely above a whisper. finally, he went quiet. it was your turn to talk. “she's dead and it's all your fault, dead. she's dead, you left her, and she's dead.”
so badly did you want to keep it together, but it was no use. your whispering had gone an octave up, hands furiously quivering as the tears came running down your face. your lips were swollen, hair plastered to your forehead with sweat as you failed against the sobs that were escaping from your throat. “i'm sorry,” were the words that finished you off. with a sob, you finally hung up. you should've done it the second you heard his voice, but it was too late. his words echoed in your head, even as you tossed your phone onto the floor, ignoring the sound of fatal cracks. you couldn't keep it together, you couldn't hold it in.
he had watched the whole scene unfold, much to your dismay. you realized it the second you held your head up. tears spilled from your eyes, and you were finally falling apart. yoongi stood there, just feet away. he stared, his eyes wide with shock as he watched you. something had awoken in him as he watched the way you held your face in your hands, sobs rocking your body. he watched you, but not for long. not wall you were so close to collapsing.
your legs were about to give out, but they never did. you were falling, but never did you hit the ground. he was right there, right beside you, arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you in so that you wouldn't fall. never in your life had you felt more grateful, more safe. you held onto the fabric of his shirt, and he didn't dare let go of you. you were fragile. in that moment, you were on the verge of breaking, and he wasn't going to let it happen. so, he pulled you close. his arms were wrapped around your frame, hand on the back of your head as he pushed your face into the crook of his neck.
he could feel the way you shook under his touch, and it broke his heart. his heart hurt for you. gentle strokes were delivered to your hair as he hushed you, and all you could do was cry. he didn't stop, not until your sobs died down. “was that your dad?” was what he finally asked, careful with his words as to not worsen the situation. all you could do was nod, and it was enough for him to keep quiet. all he could do was hold you, and that was exactly what he did. it was the comfort you had been longing for.
when you had finally calmed down, when the embrace had broken, you didn't know what to think. you cursed yourself for succumbing to your emotions as quickly as you did, you cursed yourself for breaking down. it made you wonder, what was it that made you feel so safe with him? what was it that made your heart flutter, that put your mind at ease? you were no fool, all you needed to do was remember what was engraved in your mind—cold as ice, hard as stone. never choose men over being alone. it was what had kept you afloat for so long, but it wasn't what was in your heart. it wasn't what made you feel safe, not the way you did with him.
he found himself cursing the way he found himself acting with you. it was unlike him, it was out of character for him. why, all of a sudden? why was he coming to your rescue, eating your meals? why was the urge to protect you stronger than the urge to protect his pride? it was all he thought about, why was it different with you? he didn't like different, different meant unfamiliar. he didn't like how vulnerable he was with you, how safe he felt with you. he never played safe, why start? why risk it all? he needed a distraction, and he was determined to find it.
thankfully, he knew just where to look. that night, you had gone to sleep earlier than usual, with only one thing on your mind. what had happened that day replayed in your head, but only the part you wanted to think about. him. you fell asleep thinking about him, dreading how quiet it was without his presence. he wasn't far, just two dorms over.
“hey,” he greeted almost the second the door opened, as if he was in a rush. he allowed himself to come in, despite the several yelps of disapproval. “got too much on my mind, needed to see you.” he didn't need to do anything, all he wanted was to be distracted. so, he did it the only way he knew how.
the girl scoffed, but closed the door behind him. “you should've called. what? you missed me?” the question sent a chill down his spine. no, no, no. it's what he so badly wanted to say. he didn't miss her, he didn't want her. he didn't need her the way he needed you, but he didn't want to need you. he didn't want to need anybody. to him, everybody was unreliable. everybody was waiting to ruin him. he knew he was making a mistake, but he was ready. above all else, he was ready.
“take your clothes off,” he uttered out. “and you'll see how much i missed you.”
the following morning, you had gotten up earlier than you wanted to. the basket of dirty clothes had filled up again, and someone had to take care of it. when you opened your eyes, yoongi was nowhere to be found. it made you get up faster than usual, panic coursing through your veins as you searched for him. he wasn't there. while you were in your feet, headed towards the basket, he still wasn't there. you tried to calm yourself down, assuring yourself he'd walk through the door soon enough. this time, you were right.
as you picked the basket up, you heard the doorknob jiggle. he had finally come home, just before seven in the morning. he seemed tired, as if he had got done running a marathon. the tiresome expression switched to a look of shock the second he saw you. for a moment, all you did was look at each other. “where've you been?” you finally broke the silence. the question should have been expected, but he didn't know how to answer. how could he, after everything? he gulped, thinking of what to say. so, he did what he did best. he lied.
“drinking with dongwon,” the lie came out smoother than intended, smooth enough for your worries to falter. you only nodded in response. he felt awful for lying, why do it in the first place? you had seen him in much more promiscuous situations with a variety of women, what was the issue now? he knew he couldn't, not after yesterday—after everything. his eyes shifted to the basket in your hands. “taking the clothes down to the washer?” again, all you could do was nod. you had nothing to say, you were just glad he was alright. “would you take this, too?” you watched him gesture to the shirt he had on, and complied.
all you could do was stand there as he peeled his collared shirt off, it was best not to look, but oh so difficult. desperate to ditch the embarrassment, you placed the shirt into the basket, and brushed past him.
the minute you left the room, once again did he curse himself. once time, for what he did. “fuck,” was all he could say.
the washing machine belonged to the campus, and students were free to use it as much as they needed to. people had grown more aware of how challenging it was for students to make it on their own while studying, so they did their best to help. you wanted to make a quick trip, shoving the clothes into the machine as fast as you could, but something caught your eye. all of the clothes in the bin had been worn over and over again, all but yoongi's shirt. he had a different outfit on the previous day, but came back wearing a new shirt. you had presumed it was stained with alcohol, but decided to check, just in case.
maybe things had gotten out of hand while he was drinking, but you didn't remember seeing any stains. the shirt itself was clean, from what you could tell. white stained easily. it wasn't until your hands pulled the collar upwards, did you see what the problem really was. at first, you ignored the pungent smell. the shirt reeked of cheap, fruity perfume that lit your nostrils up, and it made your stomach churn. maybe dongwon had a few girls over to drink with them, it was what you hoped for. why did it matter? it had nothing to do with you. it would've been the best case, but it wasn't. you realized it wasn't the moment you lifted the collar.
the rim of the collar was stained with lipstick. bright pink lipstick. the sight of it made your heart fall, you practically felt it in your stomach. “asshole,” you breathed out, fingers clutching the fabric. you didn't know why it made you so upset, you didn't know why the sight of it made you so angry. why was he lying about it? it wasn't the first time, and you believed it wouldn't be the last. it was all you could think about, and it hurt more than you wanted it to.
you had spent the following weeks ignoring yoongi as best as you could. unfortunately, living with him didn't make it easier for you. you did your best, unable to shake the feeling of betrayal. weeks passed, and you still didn't know why it hurt you as much as it did. you couldn't bare talking to him, afraid of lashing out. losing your temper, everything you had strived for so long.
he had noticed a shift in the atmosphere from that point on, brushing it off at first. maybe you were just having a bad day, is what he had been telling himself the first few days. those days quickly turned into weeks, and nothing was the same. his comments were ignored, even his provocations and jokes. his questions were answered abruptly and coldly. he dismissed the idea of you figuring out what he had done, as he believed there was no way for you to find out, but nothing explained the way you were acting. not even the smoking and closed windows bothered you anymore.
you spent as much time with taehyung as you possibly could. if you had classes, you'd attend them alone and in silence. all your free time was spent with taehyung, not that he minded. he was the only person you told what happened, from start to finish. you told him everything, even the bits he already knew, like what happened at the party.
“you like him, don't you?” he asked the question you had been so scared of facing, let alone answering. you tried to play it off as a joke, laughing it off, but never answering. he watched you carefully, a frown on his face. he didn't need an answer, he knew it just as well as you did. you liked him. he didn't know where to go from there, all he could do was watch you, and every move of yours gave him his answer. you couldn't keep the eye contact, your fingers toyed with your hair as you stayed quiet. he knew you liked him.
that night, he thought about it. he thought about it so much, he found himself standing outside with yoongi, in the cold air. he thought about it so much, he found himself with one of yoongi's cigarettes between his lips. there was something off about him, yoongi saw it. taehyung, who was once one of his closest friends, had grown cold, hostile. taehyung didn't pay mind to how his behavior had grown strange, he only had one thing on his mind.
“she knows,” were the words that broke the silence. yoongi froze, cigarette burning between his lips. he stayed silent, couldn't say a thing. “she knows you fucked that girl.” yoongi scoffed, but he couldn't ignore how fast his heart was pounding. the increasing anxiety wasn't detectable, he did his best to ignore it. “don't know what you're talking about.”
now, it was taehyung's turn to scoff. he didn't make eye contact with his friend, taking a drag of his cigarette as he stared into the night sky. “you're a pussy,” his words finally got the attention he was looking for. “she's this great girl, y'know? she's this beautiful, smart girl and she likes you. and i wish i knew why. but, hey, what do you know? you like her, you like this great girl, but you're too big of a pussy to do anything about it.”
“you don't know shit,” yoongi practically spat at him, too defensive for his own good. he faced his friend, but taehyung remained stoic. in his heart, yoongi knew every bit of it was true. he only returned the stance as he neared the end of his cigarette, throwing it onto the ground beneath him and stepping over it. “you're right, i don't know shit,” taehyung spat back. “you like each other, but don't do shit about it. fuck around with her some more, 'till she realizes she can do better than you.” those were the last words taehyung said to him, before walking away. it took everything in him to not punch yoongi in the face, because he so desperately needed to. he wanted him to realize what was in front of him, he wanted him to realize how lucky he was.
once again, yoongi was left alone. in his heart, he knew every word of it was true, but he couldn't bring himself to come to terms with it. it was something he needed to do, but he didn't want to. he wanted to live in his bubble, with his heart closed off to anyone but him. he needed to be selfish, because it was all he knew, but as the night grew colder and harsher, he knew it wasn't what he wanted to do.
you found yourself in your bed once more, but you couldn't fall asleep. your mind wouldn't shut off, and it pissed you off. you and yoongi had gone another day without speaking, and the silence killed you. he wasn't there, and all you could think about was where he was. you let out a dry laugh, thinking history would be funny enough to repeat itself—maybe he really was out there, wetting his dick again.
that possibility lost some of its credibility when the doorknob began to budge again. like clockwork, you found yourself watching him come in. this time, he was home early, it wasn't even midnight. for a second, you locked eyes. it was quiet, you didn't dare say a word, but you couldn't not look at him. he looked at you, admiring how pretty you were, even at your worst. even with your hair messy, lips swollen, eyes beaming with exhaustion—there was no way you couldn't look good. something in that moment had clicked, and the silence was broken.
“i fucked her,” definitely wasn't the best choice of words, but he needed something to clear the air with. still, you remained quiet, only raising your eyebrows in response. you knew, he knew you knew. “i fucked her and it was a shitty thing to do. i knew it then, and i know it now.”
you stayed quiet, the empathy currently drained from your heart. how could you feel for him? “i fucked her because i needed a way to distract myself,” he paused. “from you. i'm feeling shit i've never felt, and i'm scared of feeling it. when i'm scared, i run. it's all i've ever been doing.”
he stood there, voice steady despite how honest he was trying to be. for a second, you almost understood him. you knew what it was like, running from the same feeling your entire life. it was exactly what you were taught, but never could you have done to anybody what he had done to you. “i really hope she was worth it,” you whispered, just about loud enough for him to hear. she wasn't, he knew she wasn't. she had cost him everything, and he knew there was no coming back from it.
not much had changed as the weeks flew by. nothing but the weather. the colder the weather had gotten, the more hostile you found yourself acting. not just with yoongi, but in general. even with taehyung, you found yourself snapping just to apologize seconds later. he understood, he was patient with you. once it had started to snow, you spent more time inside than outside. seeing the fluffy, white flakes coat the ground was enough for you to get a frostbite. you spent the inside of the campus has truly become a sanctuary, until you and yoongi had started to cross paths once more.
it was only because he had been staying inside just as much. the minute he had woken up to the sight of white, it was official. he didn't even bother looking at the windows, let alone taking a step outside. he only smoked indoors, kept his friends close indoors.
your anger had finally faltered as the time passed, but you and yoongi never really spoke. you had both hoped that whatever it was you were feeling would finally fade, that it was a temporary occurence. you both prayed that one day you'd wake up, and feel nothing for the other. that day never came.
though you had finally made peace with the situation and gained your composure, the weather had lost its. everything up until then had been child's play, with the outside world freezing, but the inside providing comfort. nobody had really expected the drastic change, so nobody was prepared. when the night in question rolled around, it was brutal.
a snowstorm was in the process of unfolding. those who were able to deal with it, dealed by hiding under the covers. the wind rocked the windows, it was brutal. no matter the force, nobody was able to shut them. all the wind did was fight back. the wind howled as flakes of white scattered the dorms, the cold air practically violent. it was the reason you had found yourself on the couch, away from the windows. you were doing your best to ignore it, to block the familiar sounds from your mind. the noises were messing with your head, and the brutal cold brought memories you had no interest in re-living.
your breathing escalated, and all you could do was fight back the tears, reassuring yourself under your breath. you shut yours eyes tight, hoping everything would go quiet. just for a second. it never did. at one point, the howling had started to die down, but the air only grew colder. a new sound had graced your ears, but it wasn't the wind. it wasn't the wind howling. from the corner of your eye, you could spot the source.
yoongi had problems of his own, having taken the spot right next to the window. the covers on the bed offered no comfort, not while everything was unfolding right next to him. the cold was bitter, so unfamiliarly cruel as he rocked himself under the sheets. it was the most unstable he had ever felt, as he bit back his cries, wary of you just feet away from him. he muffled his sobs, but it wasn't enough to stop the tears from flowing down his cheeks. he hated it, it was killing him.
you listened carefully, unsure of what you were listening to. ever the curious one, you pushed yourself onto your feet, with the blanket engulfing you. he was facing the opposite side, and you were absolutely sure the sounds were coming from him, the closer you grew to him. as you got closer, you could make out the sounds better. you were right, it wasn't the wind howling. you could recognize the crying all too well.
“yoongi,” it was the first time you had spoken to him in a long time. your voice rang like a melody, offering him the slightest comfort amidst everything else. slowly, he found himself turning towards you. as he did, you saw everything much clearer, and your heart skipped a beat. his eyes were swollen, lips puffy, his cheeks slick with tears. “yoongi, are you okay?”
he shook his head, and you couldn't hide the panic in your voice. despite everything, you knew you cared. you cared, he cared. hearing you was almost enough to block everything else out. it was enough for him to ignore how vulnerable he truly was in that moment, and he knew he had reached peak vulnerability. “i fucking hate winter,” he croaked out. all you could do was nod, you nodded and it pained you because you hated it, too. you hated how it took everything from you. “took my dad from me, it was too cold.” you could barely make out what he was saying, but you couldn't believe what you were able to hear. it made your heart sink, and you knew what followed was inevitable.
“it's okay, i promise,” your heart was racing as you sat on the bed, right next to him. cold, he was so cold. despite the blankets, he was freezing. “took my mom from me, yoongi. i get it, i promise i get it.” tears in your eyes threatened to match his own as his expression flashed with shock. it wasn't something you expected to hear from anyone, let alone him. “so fucking cold,” he finally whispered, and you realized just how bad he had it. you realized just how alike you were, so you finally did something so unlike the either of you.
you were careful with your actions, even if they weren't thought through. with a sniffle, you pulled the covers up. not enough to expose him to the cold more than he already had been, but enough to make room. you made enough room and, to his astonishment, you crawled in. you moved into the spot next to him, and neither of you moved. it was unlike any warmth either of you had felt before, none of the covers in the world had anything on the warmth felt in that moment.
you stared at each other with sore, puffy eyes. he watched you with soft eyes, sniffles dying down the minute you were next to him. you were perfect. more perfect than you've ever been. he was hesitant, but he found himself pulling you in. you were just as hesitant, but you found yourself scooting closer to him. nothing mattered anymore. the air surrounding you was still cold, it still hurt, but it was like his body had grown a new mind of its own. his fingers traced the side of your face, pushing strands of your hair away from your eyes. he needed to see you, all of you, and he did. you had never been closer, and you couldn't get enough of it. he was like a furnace to you, even though you were the one warming him. from the inside out.
“i love you,” he finally whispered, and neither of you looked away. he knew he couldn't take back what he said, the same way he knew how much he meant it. the words were foreign, they were words you hadn't heard in a long time. finally, you smiled. “i love you, too.” the shock that spread through his body couldn't be mimicked. for the first time in a long while, he smiled. he smiled back, and it was a genuine smile. one that wasn't provoked by teasing and joking, nothing of the sort. he hadn't been loved in a long time.
the wind stayed consistent, but nothing mattered anymore. it was as if a barrier had formed around the two of you, one that unapologetically emitted the warmest, kindest comfort imaginable. yoongi found himself moving closer to you, if possible, and you knew what was coming. you knew, and you were prepared. you loved him, you hated the cold, and you could never be what you despised the most, so you let him.
with his hand ever so gently in your hair, you allowed yourself to come closer, until the distance finally faltered. his lips pressed against yours, something he had found himself dreaming about for too long. your lips melted, colliding so gently, he swore they were made for each other. he had kissed a countless amount of women, but never like that. every ounce of regret left your body, and all you could do was kiss back. it was what you wanted more than anything. you wanted him.
he stroked your arm gently, his thumb tracing circles on your skin, sending shivers of a different kind down your spine. you looked up at him, feeling your heart race a little faster as you thought about what you wanted to say. he was so warm, so solid and comforting, and you felt a sudden rush of love for him that was almost overwhelming. you took a deep breath and whispered, “i've never done this before.” his eyes searched yours, understanding and patience in their depths. he leaned forward and kissed your forehead, his breath warm against your skin. “that's okay,” he said, his voice a gentle rumble. “we'll take it slow.”
the room was filled with a tension that was both nerve-wracking and exciting as you both realized the gravity of the moment. you felt a blush spread across your cheeks, but yoongi just held you tighter, his eyes filled with nothing but affection and reassurance.
he leaned in closer, his breath warm against your ear as he said, “but are you sure?” his question hung in the air, the only sound the soft rustle of the covers and the muffled sounds of the winter night outside. you nodded, feeling your pulse quicken. “i'm sure,” you whispered back, your voice barely audible.
yoongi pulled back, looking into your eyes, searching for any hint of doubt. finding none, he leaned in and kissed you softly, his hand moving from your arm to cup your cheek. the kiss grew deeper, more urgent, as you both became lost in the moment. the bed dipped slightly as he shifted his weight, moving to adjust himself beside you, his hand still cradling your face. his eyes searched yours, asking for permission, and you gave it with a shy nod.
he started to kiss your neck, his lips feather-light as they moved down to your collarbone. you felt his hand slowly make its way down your body, and your breath hitched in anticipation. the cold outside was forgotten as the heat between you grew, a warmth that seemed to drive away every other concern. his touch was gentle, exploratory, as if he was learning every inch of you. you felt your body respond, your heart racing and your skin tingling where he touched. his fingers traced the line of your jaw, then moved to the hem of your shirt, his thumbs hooking under the fabric.
you lifted your arms, allowing him to pull the shirt over your head, the cool air of the room making you shiver again. but as soon as the shirt was off, his warmth was back, his chest pressed against yours, his hands running up and down your back in soothing strokes, only to make another appearance, fondling your tits in a way so gentle, even he couldn't believe it. he listened to your soft moans, and it took everything in him to resist pounding you right then and there. the snow continued to fall outside, casting a serene, silent backdrop to the intimate scene unfolding in the warmth of the bedroom. the only sounds were the soft rustle of the covers and the steady beat of two hearts, in sync with each other.
his eyes never left yours as he reached for the button of your pants, his gaze filled with a mix of love and lust. you felt a thrill of excitement and nerves as he undid the button, then the zipper, his hands moving with purpose and care. he slid your pants down, revealing your bare legs to the cool air. you felt his warm breath against your skin as he kissed his way down your stomach, making you gasp.
the anticipation was almost unbearable, your body trembling with a mix of cold and desire. yoongi took his time, his kisses like a warm embrace against the winter's chill. he reached your navel, and your hips instinctively arched towards him. his eyes never left yours, as if asking for confirmation at every step.
he gently pushed your legs apart, his eyes filled with a tenderness that made you feel cherished. his hand trailed down your inner thigh, and your skin burned with every touch. when his fingers finally reached the place where no one else had been before, you tensed, but his soft, reassuring whispers kept you relaxed. with a feather-light touch, he began to explore, his movements slow and deliberate. each caress against your soaking pussy sent waves of pleasure through you, and your eyes fluttered shut as you moaned softly. the cold air was forgotten, replaced by the warmth of his body and the gentle pressure of his hand.
“fuck, princess, so wet for me,” he murmured, his dick painfully hard, practically begging for you.
as he touched you, he watched your reactions closely, learning what made you gasp, what made you shiver with pleasure. his eyes searched yours, looking for any sign of discomfort or hesitation. but all he saw was a deep, unspoken trust that made his heart swell with love. you felt your body responding to his touch, and you reached for him, your hands shaking slightly as you pulled his shirt over his head. his skin was hot against your palms, and you traced the lines of his muscles, feeling the steady thump of his heart beneath your fingertips.
the snowfall outside grew heavier, the world outside muffled and distant. the only thing that mattered was the warmth of his body against yours, the feel of his skin under your hands, and the love that was growing stronger with every shared moment.
as he pulled his boxers down, you realized just how unprepared you really were. he could stretch you out as much as he wanted, it still couldn't prepare you for what caught your eye. he was big, and he knew it. he was big and throbbing against the flesh of his abdomen, and a you could do was stare. “it's not gonna fit,” you whispered. despite his laugh, your words only made him harder. the thought of you, so small and fragile under him, breaking because of his cock—it made him desperate for you. yoongi leaned in, his breath warm against your ear as he whispered, “you'll take it, yeah?” you nodded, your eyes wide and filled with a mix of excitement and nerves. he kissed you again, deep and slow, as if trying to imprint every sensation on your soul. you felt him shift, the bed protesting slightly under his weight as he positioned himself above you. he reached for the condom on the nightstand, his movements sure and practiced. but his eyes never left yours, filled with a tenderness that was almost painful in its intensity.
you felt his hard, pulsing cock against your entrance and it was enough to make you gasp. he let out a sigh, the sight of you so vulnerable for him enough to make him cum on the spot. as he entered you, the world outside disappeared, replaced by the feeling of him filling your pussy up, the sound of your mingled breaths the only music in the room. it was a moment of pain, quickly overshadowed by a deeper, more profound sensation of belonging. you held onto him tightly, your nails digging into his back as he began to move, his rhythm gentle and steady. each stroke was a promise of forever, a declaration of love in the most primal and intimate way possible.
“so fucking tight, holy shit,” he groaned, eyes flashing between the way your pussy sucked him up, so pretty and greedy, and the way your face scrunched up in pleasure, pure pleasure. you and yoongi moved together, each stroke bringing you closer to the precipice of pleasure. your breaths grew ragged, your hearts pounding in unison as you climbed higher and higher. and when you finally fell over the edge, you came all over him. “just like that, all over my dick.”
you were overwhelmed, the foreign feeling gracing you with an irreplaceable euphoria you've so badly been craving. he leaned forward, capturing your lips in yet another messy kiss, his hands erratic. they moved as fast as they could, savoring the way your tits felt in them, the way your fleshy thighs spilled out of them. as he pounded into you, a you could do was moan into his mouth. “so good, fuck, yoongi,” the sound of his name leaving your mouth in such a dirty position was enough to send him over the edge.
he was desperate, his hips slamming into your pelvis as his dick brushed your sweet spot. your walls squeezed him, practically milking him for all he had to offer. his groans grew louder as he neared his high, his thrusts sending your eyes into the back of your head as he savored you. you were all his. “gonna cum, fuck,” he moaned, and he was right. he came with a groan, lost in the way you moaned for him, foreheads pressed against each other. he came into the condom, his dick throbbing into your cunt as he did so. it was good, so good.
when he finally pulled out, you did nothing but stare into each other's eyes. you knew that you had just shared something incredibly special, something that would change everything. but as you looked into his eyes, you also knew that no matter what was to come, you would face it together, wrapped in the warmth of your love, and it was stronger than any storm.
“i love you,” this time, it was your turn to say it. for a second, the fear of him leaving, discarding you like you meant nothing to him, like you were just another girl, became present. you weren't just another girl, you never were. “i love you, too.” it was enough, more than enough. how could you ever be just another girl? he alone wasn't strong enough against the cold, not without you.
✧.*
a/n: i hope this does well because this cliché took so long to write lol!! if it does, i'll do a follow-up, as there's a lot of unfinished business haha. only if it's what the readers want. thank you for reading!!!
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chuubian · 8 months ago
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Kinktober week four:
Taste
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Tags Yae miko x fem reader, mdni, witch au, aphrodisiacs, breaking and entering, face sitting, Yae is just a tiny bit mean
Summary While looking for shelter during a blizzard, you find a small cottage- missing its owner. When you finally meet the witch who occupies the house, you inexplicably feel drawn to her.
A/N Can you guys tell i hate landlords
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From the frosty scenery surrounding you, only a measly little cottage could be seen in the distance. The fact that it's holding up at all during a blizzard as powerful as this one, is a miracle in itself. A sense of relief washes over you. Finally, some refuge. Getting kicked out in the middle of winter was brutal. No amount of begging convinced your landlord to show any kind of mercy. Apparently, they already had a new tenant waiting. One who had actually paid the ridiculous prices set, and earned the property owners consideration. It had been hours out in the storm.  Snow caked the bottom of your boots- melting it just enough so the freezing water soaks through the fabric, and numbing your toes. There were many times during your journey where you contemplated laying down and letting the snowdrift smother you.
Hugging the coat tighter around yourself, the muscles of your legs struggled to traverse through the thick blanket of ice layering the ground. As you got closer, lungs burning, you took note of the symbols carved into the snow surrounding the cottage. Did an artist live here? Clearly it was some kind of creative soul- golden ornaments and bells hung from the walls, jingling softly as they’re jostled by the air.
The door is unlocked. You easily push it open, engulfed in a rush of hot air that thaws your frozen muscles. It's surprisingly quiet, save for the crackling fire. No one seems to be home, but why would they leave the fireplace on? That's so dangerous. Either way, you walk in deeper, cautious of any inhabitants that may come at you with a sword. The cottage is relatively small, consisting of only one bedroom, a small kitchen, and a bathroom that didn't even have a sink. The living room was cramped with some furniture and a coffee table. Everywhere you looked, every table had at least one cauldron. Did the owner really need to cook in every room?
Grabbing a small blanket from a nearby closet, you curl up in front of the chimney. The heat radiating from the fire soothes your tired body, lulling you into a tranquil slumber. Waves of comfort ebb and flow through your figure- allowing your mind to go blank.
Your dreams are filled with scenes of a pink haired lady taunting you, finding every one of your weaknesses and using them against you. She smiles cruelly while you writhe in pain- throat searing as you scream, clawing at your throbbing stomach. Your spine feels like it's being ripped out of your body and she doesn't even take a second look. Diabolical laughter echoed through your head. The wicked expression on her face is singed into your brain, permanently lingering in your subconscious.
Panting, chest aching, you're woken from your sleep forcibly. Your eyes dart around frantically. The fireplace has been turned off but somehow you don't feel cold- if anything, there's a thin sheen of sweat covering your skin. You rip the blanket off, heart racing, and stand up. There, hiding in the darkness, is the silhouette of a person. Staring at you. A shiver runs down your spine. Your gut is begging you to run, but your feet remain planted firmly in the ground.
“W-who are you?”
“I should ask you the same thing.”
The figure steps forward and pink hair pops into view- just like that lady. No way. How? She was supposed to stay in your nightmares, not become real. Once again, your body is reminded of the torture she put you through. Your stomach feels like it's eating its own lining, like the acid is burning through the meat of your digestive system. All the saliva in your mouth dries up, leaving your throat parched. The look on your features must have been visibly panicked because the pink haired woman quickly steps forward- laying a delicate hand over your shoulder as her fluffy tail wraps around your waist. Although you're terrified, her scent fully engulfs you- it smells like cherry blossoms. It’s almost hypnotizing.
“Awww don't be scared…i wont hurt you, I'm assuming you got the nightmares huh?”
“How..?”
Breathless, your voice comes out in muted whispers.
“You didn't notice… You can break into my house but not use your brain to put the context clues together?”
Looking around in a frenzied state, your eyes gloss over all the details. There's nothing. What does she mean?
“You still don't get it…”
Her saccharine voice looms over you, tricking you into a false sense of security.
“Let me spell it out for you.”
Slender hands take hold of your chin, forcing you to look over at the coffee table.
“Do you see that?”
“T-the pot?”
She hums softly, breath brushing over the back of your neck.
“Yes, the cauldron.”
Sharp nails bite into the flesh of your cheek- mildly stinging. This time, she drags your eyeline up to the ceiling.
“Herbs?”
“Yes, darling. I’m drying them.”
Is there actually something you're supposed to be noticing?
“You like to cook?”
Your muscles are stiff, unwilling to unwind. A certain fear gnawed at the back of your mind- would she kill you if you got it wrong? How is this even possible? Maybe you're just in another wicked dream. Your landlord could have put a curse on you for not paying the rent on time. If there was any way to develop magical abilities overnight, he certainly would have figured it out. That's just how determined he is to get more money.
“No.”
Pushing  her chest against your back, she slowly walks you towards the door. Her legs and yours knock together on the way- almost making you face plant onto the shiny wooden floors beneath you. The whole house shakes as the entrance is yanked open. Bitter cold air rushes towards you, attaching itself to any semblance of warmth- chilling you to the bone. At least the storm stopped, only small snowflakes flutter down gently.
“What do you see here?”
Only ice is visible. Even the sun has hidden itself away behind gray clouds.
“Snow.”
Her hand smoothly flattens over your lower stomach as her tail wraps itself around your leg. It helps keep you toasty.
“That's not all, you don't notice anything off?”
“No… it just looks like snow.”
Sighing, she pulls you back inside and slams the door shut.
“You're a little dim aren't you?”
“I don't understand….”
The pink haired woman tuts condescendingly, tapping your cheek with her polished nail.
“I'm a witch, darling.”
Your brain  swirls, eyes widening. A witch..?! You broke into a witch's house?? Blood freezing, icicles stream through your veins forcibly- the tips of your fingers throb and prickle painfully. It all made sense now. The weird drawings in the snow, the ornaments outside, cauldrons and herbs strewn throughout the house. It was all for her spells. Giggling, her silky tail tickles the sides of your waist.
“Oh come on… How could you not have known?”
Heated fingers creep up your spine to the base of your neck, tapping lightly. Tingles emerge from the spots she touches, sending chills through your body. She's so.. touchy. And you don't even mind, despite the fact that she was the creation of your nightmares.
“But, when I was asleep-”
“I know, I know.”
She interrupts. A delicate finger taps your lips, shushing you.
“It's just a simple spell to punish intruders… but you don't seem like you mean harm.”
Releasing her pleasant, lukewarm hold on you, she rests her hand on her hips- tail thumping against the floor impatiently.
“Sit down. If you don't want me to kick you out with the snow, you'll have to come up with a reason for breaking into my house.”
Without giving you time to respond she heads off in the direction of the kitchen. The jewelry and ornaments hanging off her body and clothing clink loudly as she walks. For a few minutes, you’re granted a break from the constant anxiety brewing and expanding over you. Thankfully, she didn't seem angry. If you just explained, you're sure she'd understand. Holding a teacup and pot set, the woman walks back into the living room- bringing with her an air of coziness. She made tea. In adorable pink cups. It's unnecessarily sweet. You trespassed and she's still treating you like a welcomed guest.
Heart pounding in your chest, your wobbly hand reaches for a cup- desperate for the warmth she once enveloped you in.
“So why are you here?”
She watches as you take a sip, not moving to grab her own teacup.
Steaming hot liquid oozes down your esophagus and settles in your belly- acting like a furnace to spread its blazing flare through your extremities. Blood rushes up to your cheeks, casting a healthy glow over your face. You set the cup back down and take a deep breath. She'll understand… right?
“Well, my landlord kicked me out of my place. I didn't have anywhere to stay so I started walking around, and then I saw the cottage… I really am sorry, but I thought I was going to die.”
Her eyes narrow, tail flicking delicately. It’s like she can peer right into your core, reading you with ease and determining if you're lying with just one glance. Laying one hand on the plush couch, she leans into it- getting comfortable. She seems satisfied with your answer as she hums quietly.
“Okay, I believe you. You can stay here for the time being.”
“T-that's it? It's that easy?”
She nods.
“It's that easy.”
Heat surges under your skin. It feels like you're floating, like your body is lighter- not weighed down by all the stressful problems that had plagued you for the past month. Maybe you didn't have a lot of money, but the pink haired woman let you stay. And although she's a witch, she promised she wasn't going to hurt you.
“Thank you so much!”
She's so kind. You have to find a way to  pay her back somehow.
“I-I'll clean up around the house and stuff! I won't be a bother, I promise.”
She chuckles, and suddenly it seems like the sun is right in front of you. Her smile is so bright, vivid.
“That would be appreciated. If you want, you can also try out my potions, I have been needing a cute little test subject.”
“Uhm… Would it be dangerous…?”
Crossing her pale legs, she taps her chin for a few seconds- thinking.
“You don't need to worry about it, darling. You'll be fine.”
That's all the confirmation you need.
“Okay then! I'll do it.”
She smirks mischievously, it almost makes you suspicious. Almost.
“Great, we'll start tomorrow.”
Standing up, she turns to walk away. Before she can go off to do whatever it is she does all day, you stop her.
“Wait!”
Her head whips back around, velvety tail swaying smoothly. It's as if it's trying to get you to touch it- hypnotizing you.
“You never told me your name.”
“It's Yae. Yae Miko. Don't forget it, darling.”
Her slim fingers drum against your cheek, almost like she's scolding you. Before you know it, she's gone again, hiding herself away in some corner of the house that you can't access.
The rest of the day is spent alone. Cleaning, although tedious when you lived alone, is now a welcome activity. At least you had a place to clean. You assumed Yae didn't mind you taking her food, but she didn't come out to scold you for using one of her cauldrons and cooking. It was kind of worrying, actually. Did she not need to eat? You even made a large enough amount for her to have some too.
Thoughtless, menial labor was tranquilizing. As the muddy, contaminated water was poured away, so was your unease. Once you feel satisfied with the work you've done, you grab your blanket again, setting up on the couch in front of the fireplace. This would be much more comfortable than the hard wooden floor you'd slept on the night before. Your body sinks into the cushiony sofa, engulfing you in a cocoon of warmth and satisfaction. The crackling of the flames acts as white noise- luring you into a restful sleep.
Fortunately, no more nightmares occur. As morning time approaches, you're woken by a bright golden light in your face. Eyes blinking open, you're temporarily blinded by the dazzling sun rays. When you sit up and face the other direction, you can barely see Yae in the corner through the passing blind spot in your vision. Why does she stare so much? It's seriously unsettling. She doesn't wait for you to fully wake up before she does.
“Get up, darling. I need your help.”
You groan.
“Already? I just woke up.”
“Oh, do you have something else to do?”
Grumbling, you rip the snuggly sheets off your body.
“Fine.”
Yae grins smugly, leading you through maze-like hallways. She must have done something to the house because you don't remember seeing these places the night you broke in. The wooden boards are cold against your feet, freezing the balls of your feet- threatening to cramp them all the way from your toes, up to your ankles. She finally stops in front of a small pink door, ears twitching before she walks in, not saying a word.
As you pass through the entrance, the breath is stolen from your lungs…. Wow. It's huge on the inside. Like a giant public library, but instead of books, the shelves are filled with various dried herbs and multi-colored potions. Your nose is immediately attacked with the scent of iris and cherry blossoms. Large windows let the sun to light up the room beautifully. Can Yae’s magic really be so strong that the glass didn't break during that horrible blizzard?
“Come on, don't be shy.”
Fuzzy fur drapes itself around your hips- pushing you towards the small table in the middle, covered in various glass bottles, herbs, and spilled liquids. You don't dare to touch them. Yae’s delicate hands pluck out a dainty thin vial filled with a bright pink elixir. The cork at the top, kept everything from spilling out as she handed it to you.
“Try this.”
You pop open the bottle, sniffing it. It's sickeningly sweet. Your throat and tongue are violently assaulted by the steam wafting up- your gums ache to bite down on something, mouth watering.
“What is this? Pure sugar?”
Tapping the bottom of the vial, she tries to force it up to your lips.
“Nope, it's a potion to help with your… loneliness.”
“I never said I was lonely.”
Holding a finger up to her lips, she giggles playfully.
“I can read between the lines. Now go on, this is your one job, it's very safe I promise.”
Slightly embarrassed, you bring the cool glass vial up to your lips and tip it back. As soon as the potion touches your lips and tongue you're hit with the intense honeyed spiciness. Your eyes water as the viscous liquid slides down your throat- the chance to lick the remainder off your lips never comes as it absorbs itself into your skin. A tickle in your throat forces you to double over coughing. It's like your stomach is hopelessly attempting to push the elixir back up out of your esophagus.
Peering out the window, you run your tongue over your teeth- becoming conscious of the gritty sensation left behind in your mouth.
“How do you feel?”
Your attention is drawn back to Yae, core tightening when you study the exquisite features on her face and the elegant outline of her figure. Her eyes meet yours and your entire world collapses. Sediment cascades down on you- crushing and burying you under heavy rock. Answering her question is the last thing on your mind. Your tongue feels swollen in your mouth, and your brain is spinning.
Static buzzes through the roots of your hair, down to the bottom of your feet when Yae snakes a slender arm around your waist, pushing her body up against yours. She's so warm.. it makes you want to melt under her, let her manipulate and contort you any way she pleases like melted chocolate. Moisture covers your skin, leaving the surface of it sticky.
“Is it hot? hm?”
Her voice is deeper than before, alluring. She was tempting you. Like a black widow- seducing you, only to destroy you after she's gotten all she needs from you. Unconsciously, you nod.
“I bet… lay down.”
All it takes from her is a little push towards the long couch near the window, before your body obeys by itself. Your body descends into the plush cushions and Yaes legs tangle with yours. In this position, where she straddles your thigh with her thin arms propped next to your face, you’re enveloped by her scent. It's intoxicating. You'll never be able to smell cherry blossoms without thinking of her ever again.
“W-what was that potion?”
Sharp nails gently scratch down your cheek, creating sensitive tingles over it.
“Nothing much, just a simple aphrodisiac.”
Fire ignites your nerves alight, it's like you're being burned alive. The wind gets knocked out of your lungs as she drags her smooth hand down your neck and rests it over your sternum.
“You're e-evil,”
She tsks disapprovingly, pinching the small exposed flesh of your chest. Small, needy  whines free themselves from your lungs as you arch into her touch. How could this have happened? You're so stupid to trust a stranger and yet… you want her. More than you need air to breathe.
“Don't talk to me like that. Unless you want me to leave you here by yourself.”
Keening, your hands travel up to the edges of her uniform, curling around the fabric hysterically.
“Noo.. stay.”
“That's more like it.”
She purrs into your ear, already tugging the hem of your shirt up- working quickly to undress you. Fervid palms smooth over your exposed stomach. Her pupils are dilated and she keeps dragging her tongue over her teeth and lips. Like she wants to ingest you. The tail behind her is flicking impatiently, whipping your legs painfully.
Plump lips crash against your own, dragging her tongue against your bottom lip- she doesn't wait for permission before forcing herself inside. Deepening the kiss, her body leans down more, pressing her plush tits against yours. She's greedy. Taking all she can from you- the air from your lungs, the ability to think clearly. Her teeth clash against yours, like she's trying to eat you.
Pointed, needle-like nails dig into the flesh of your cheeks as Yae pulls away harshly. Your lips make a wet smacking sound, clinging to each other.
“Can I sit on your face?”
You nod dumbly, lips swollen and parted. It was nice that she bothered to ask, but at this point she could ask to kill your entire family and your brain would be stupid  enough to go ahead and say yes. Yae quickly pulls the stupid uniform over her head. Your eyes rove over her graceful figure, taking in the softness of her hips, the alluring curve of her waist. Mouth watering, your eyesight moves down to where she’s still covered by her panties. Heat washes over you, twisting uncomfortably. You need her to hurry. She was being so slow on purpose.
“Please… Yae…”
Chucking, she gently slaps your hip. Your body craves more.
“I know, I know.”
Thumbs hook under the waistband of her underwear, pulling down until they’re fully off- thrown somewhere in the distance but you dont care at this point. All your mind can think about is how she would taste, how she would feel. The pink haired witch straddles your face and you're met with the sight of her glistening pussy. Tears spring into your eyes as she puts her full weight on you. Finally. This is all you wanted.
The pressure against you is a welcome kind. Not like the pressures of life from before- paying you rent on time, finding food. This is better. How could you ever go back after this?
A low buzz of excitement covers you. Tongue laving over her clit, taking in her syrupy taste- her hips twitch against your face.
“F-fuck, yeah… just like that.”
Grinding down on your tongue, Yae has absolutely no shame. Her beautiful hands thread themselves through the strands of your hair, tugging and directing you how she likes.
Your fingers dig into the fat of her hips, trying to keep her still but your efforts are proving useless. She didn't care that your face was shining with her slick- in fact, she encourages it.
Wrapping your lips around her clit, you suck harshly- tongue flicking over it eagerly. Her hands tighten in your strands as a small gasp bubbles up her throat. It encourages you more, It felt like you were drunk. Your head was spinning like crazy, eyes developing a glassy sheen. The need to please is overwhelming. The need for all of her. Her taste, her touch, her scent.
You desperately pull her down more. Lapping in a fast rhythm, you push your tongue against her entrance, eating her out like it's your last meal. Yae’s thighs tremble with the effort of holding herself up. Gushy walls squishing around you. The pitch in her voice gets higher as she quivers over you. You slurp at her mercilessly, determined to draw out more sweet noises from her lips.
When she finally comes apart, her entire body weight drops onto you, legs squishing against the sides of your head. Your eyes roll back in ecstasy, strung out and drunk off of her.
Shaking, she gradually lifts herself from you, giggling at the wetness she's left all over the bottom half of your face. Your tongue darts out, trying to get all of it, but before you can finish, Yae is undoing the buttons of your pants. It's distracting. She's so beautiful, it almost feels wrong to make her please you. As your bottoms are tugged off, cool air hits your warm skin. Goosebumps rise throughout, sending shivers up your spine. Her gentle hands pry your legs apart, crawling closer to where you needed her most.
Her warm breath brushes over your inner thighs. She doesn't move past that.
“Y-Yae please…”
You can hear the cruel chuckle she lets out. And see the way her tail sways wickedly from side to side, running over your legs.
“Hurry..”
Large wet kisses are pressed against your inner thighs, leaving a small trail of her lipstick on your skin. Then finally, after centuries of torture, her tongue darts out to lap at your clit. Sharpened nails dig into your flesh, trying to keep you from bucking against her wildly. A choked whine is caught in your throat, pain and anguish written all across your face.
“Nghh fuck…”
She's like a woman starved- hot tongue flicking against your entrance, slipping inside. An embarrassing sob traps itself in your chest, body spasming with exertion. Trembling, your hand clenches in the strands of her hair, desperate for any way to tether yourself to reality. Loud slurping and sucking sound fill the room- echoing back at you. With every movement from her, an explosion of electricity sets your nerves alight.
“O-oh god.. Yae..”
Mind clouded with lust, you roll your hips back against her. She doesn't stutter even more a second, finding her way over to your puffy clit, drawing tight little circles. Sparks flash behind your eyes and thick whimpers of ecstasy spring past your lips.
Your body is reduced to its purest instincts as Yae works her magic between your legs. Brain empty, your visceral response is to pull her closer. The knot in your lower belly tightens. The heat simmering under your skin is elevating and on the verge of  boiling over. Unintelligible babbles breach the edges of your mouth. What once were comprehensible words are reduced to merely the slurrings of a person filled with euphoria.
“I'm c-close…mmng..”
Blistering pleasure shoots through your body, ridding your lungs of any air. A pervasive ringing ringing resounds through your head, leaving your brain dizzy. Surges of pure bliss roll over you. Your hands tighten in her hair, as you're struggling to stay sane. It feels like months- years- pass before you can finally think clearly again. When you do, you're met with Yae, still naked (not complaining), peacefully sleeping next to you. She snores softly, tail twitching happily in its, presumably, good dream. She subconsciously drifts towards you, searching for warmth.
She looks so cute, but this won't stop you from getting your revenge soon.
113 notes · View notes
minkdelovely · 1 year ago
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love and power
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chapter ten: part one
“i won’t die for love
but ever since i met you,
you could have my heart
and i would break it for you.”
Alastor x Fem!Reader ; MDNI 18+ ; [y/n] used sparingly ; Alias in Hell is Sylvie
tags/warnings: vibes are not good y’all — it’s a blizzard in this here hotel 🥶 angst, crying, descriptions of sadness/loneliness, valentino mention lol, alcohol abuse and drug usage, mentions of bruising and bite wound recovery, power dynamics
word count: 5.8k
author’s note: okay, i was really hoping to have this all completed today but between some family obligations and graduations i didn’t have all the time i wanted to wrap this up in one go. but i really couldn’t keep this to myself anymore — i am so desperate to share what i have ready for you. i am still hacking away at the rest but for now, please accept part one of this finale with my gratitude and love 🙏🏻💖 @hazelfoureyes & @sugoi-writes come and get it my darlings ❤️‍🔥
prelude ; chapter one ; chapter two ; chapter three ; chapter four ; chapter five ; chapter six ; chapter seven ; chapter eight ; chapter nine ; chapter ten: part one ; chapter ten: part two
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The week that passed was long. Undoubtedly the way weeks in Hell were supposed to feel — grueling and bleak, devoid of joy. Hours passing like decades, leaving its casualties wrung out and aged.
Despite the rift only being between the two of you, it was felt by everyone in the hotel. Much to their misfortune, neither of you were spending hardly (if any) time in your rooms. No one knew exactly why, of course, but understood well enough to suffer in silence and bear the brunt for now. The weight of what transpired hanging in the air of whichever room either of you entered. 
Yours took the form of an icy draft, reminiscent of past winters that could only be felt again here in a manner such as this. Wandering the halls of the hotel, save for one, like a specter. Leaving sinners in your wake grateful once you had finally passed through; the natural heat of Hell returning in your absence to soothe their frostbite as if apologizing on your behalf.
And if your melancholy was that of a cold wind, Alastor’s was the storm that bore it. Blustering and wild in its unpredictability, an exposed nerve waiting for a catalyst. Always he was in the eye of it. Not even knowing himself which direction it may take — malice, apathy, vengeance — but claiming victims nonetheless, despite his efforts to maintain his air of refinement around the hotel. The hairline cracks in his guise couldn’t help but leak.
Even Niffty was proceeding with caution; not daring to climb the length of his body as she so often did without care. She had only made one attempt in the interim of the argument and had yet to fully recover from the murderous glare Alastor had threatened her with. His tense, bloody smile was still the first thing she saw when she closed her eyes at night. But she was warming up to it.
Husk was particularly displeased with the whole affair, having to deal with each of you as you took turns sulking at the bar in between bouts of sucking the life out of anyone you passed. Something had to be done about it. Not only for his whiskey supply, but he just also wished Alastor would mope somewhere else. And there was no telling which mood he would be in by the time he was ready to go back upstairs. Making it dangerous for anyone still roaming around in the late hours of the night. 
Asking Alastor about what was wrong was a dead end, and thankfully no one was naive enough to try. But you were still so despondent, nursing your drinks at one of the booths in a dark corner of the bar, that no one dared approach you yet. Though Angel was getting close. In fact, an idea was forming in his mind right now as he watched you sulking from his usual seat at the counter. 
“I can’t fuckin’ take much more’a this,” he grumbled lowly to Husker, frowning over his drink. “It’s startin’ to rub off on me! I’ve been infected.” His histrionic expression of woe only mildly overdone.
It really was wearing on him, as much as he tried not to let it. But between the atmosphere at the studio and now this… Angel could only be so resilient. Though he did his best to ensure it wasn’t bleeding into his work. Not an easy feat, especially when he thought back to that weird voicemail he got from Valentino about a week ago. 
Tell our little Sylvie I said ‘you’re welcome’ — God knows she really fucking needed it. Such a repressed thing… really wish I could have kept her longer.
The implication had actually made Angel lose sleep. Even knowing that Alastor had been with you, when it came to Val the possibilities were endless. And clearly whatever he instigated between you and Alastor had ended in disaster. Angel hadn’t relayed the message, of course. Nor had he given Valentino even a hint of what was going on at the hotel, much to his chagrin. He’d sooner face the Exorcists again than give Val the satisfaction, and it was fun being able to piss him off, whatever the consequence. Still…
“Have you tried talk—”
“Not a fuckin’ chance,” Husk said definitively, an unimpressed look on his face. “I ain’t gettin’ mixed up in this shit. The less I know about what’s going on between the two of ’em, the better.” He shuddered just at the thought.
Angel sighed, but understood Husk’s resistance to the idea as he obviously wasn’t prepared to try and speak to the Radio Demon about it himself. Getting a peak behind Alastor’s curtain was an intriguing, but ultimately deadly, risk — especially for the bartender. Meaning there was only one way out. 
He glanced back over his shoulder at you, taking in the distant look in your eyes as you absently played with the two small straws in your glass. Feeling resolved, Angel downed what was left of his drink and gave Husk a quick wish me luck before walking over. 
“All right, doll face, you’re comin’ with me. We’re overdue for a gab sesh,” Angel said, leaning over the table to grab your drink. His tone of voice was kind, though a little irked, and left no room for argument. “It’s uh… about that time anyway,” he added softly, offering a hand to help you out of the booth when you didn’t move.
That time… There was no need for him to say more; you knew Alastor was coming down here after you went up to your room for the night. Was it getting that late already? The bar didn’t have windows so it was impossible to tell how long you had been sitting there in the dark, counting only the number of drinks you consumed. Four wasn’t too bad. Yesterday it had been more. Maybe almost double. But it was hard to remember.
You took his hand and scooted yourself out of the corner, grateful to feel someone holding you steady again. It nearly brought you to tears in your drunken state, but you managed to blink them back and focused on the impending journey to the elevators. All your concentration going to your feet as your arm gripped his for support, which he didn’t falter in providing. Angel had plenty of experience in this, after all. You weren’t the first drunk he had helped home and you wouldn’t be the last.
A chill ran through you as you crossed the lobby. When you looked over your shoulder you could’ve sworn you saw a shadow flitting across the carpet… but it was gone as soon as you blinked.
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Husk groaned as Alastor materialized at the stool he’d adopted at the bar counter — dead center, wouldn’t you know it. Muttering to himself about how Angel had just barely rid him of one problem only to be replaced with an even bigger one; turning to the shelf behind him to grab the whiskey he already knew the son-of-a-bitch wanted. 
“Quit your bitching and just give me the bottle,” Alastor grumbled, rubbing at his temples as Husk unceremoniously obeyed. Slamming it down in front of his keeper and earning a tight, unamused look in response. “Bastard…”
“Never said I wasn’t,” Husk scoffed as he set down an accompanying drinking glass. Amused by the display of decorum Alastor subjected himself to, as if he wasn’t about to drown himself in liquor for the fifth night in a row. 
It was starting to catch up to him, though Husk wouldn’t dream of letting him know. It was obvious if you looked at the Overlord long enough, which most people didn’t. And they were smart not to. 
Husk, however, had no choice other than to spend hours hanging around the otherwise empty bar waiting for Alastor to finish sinking his sorrows bottle after bottle. So finding the tells was inevitable. Dark circles under worn eyes, a few hairs out of place. Counterfeit smile reaching a level of mania the bartender would have thought impossible before this week. 
But that was none of his business.
Alastor ignored him then, pulling the cork out of the bottleneck before pouring into his glass and downing it with a single swallow. He repeated this two more times before deciding to pace himself.
It didn’t take passing you in the lobby to know you had been here. Your scent permeated the room, mingling with liquor and tobacco, smelling closer now to cyanide than your usual floral almond and cherry; surpassing the bitterness Alastor had ever assumed it could reach. He detested how much he enjoyed it, especially when it was hanging fresh in the air as it was now, though he didn’t know whether it was an outward or inner loathing. The aromatics of the bar helped cut through the ache. Made it tolerable. But…
“It smells awful in here,” Alastor sighed bitterly. Eyes faraway as he let his nose hover over the glass before taking another sip. 
If he said it out loud it could be true.
About as awful as you fuckin’ look, Husk thought to himself before casually responding, “Well this is a bar in Hell. None of ’em smell like roses.”
Alastor merely hummed in response; a disconnected sound. Most likely the last sound the bartender would manage to get out of the Overlord for the rest of the night. 
It wouldn’t be wise for Husk to let on that he knew exactly what Alastor meant by the smell, but he did agree. That was part of the reason he was getting to the end of his rope with the both of you. Although you kept to yourself, the scent you were emitting was harsh and it lingered. Husk was beginning to wonder if it had actually started seeping into the wallpaper.
As difficult as it was to stay neutral, especially since he could understand certain aspects of your plight, getting involved was simply too dangerous. He thought he had a good grasp on his keeper’s moods and behavior, but this was all new territory. Tread lightly.
And so, he reserved himself to suffering through your poisoned aroma and Alastor’s moods. Hoping to whatever benevolent entity that could hear his silent pleas that Angel Dust would manage a breakthrough.
✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧
You were sitting crossed-legged on Angel’s bed as he rummaged through his specially made walk-in closet. Doing your best to fight off the sleep that was beginning to weigh on your eyelids, but it was a test of will that you were rapidly losing. The temptation to lay down and nestle yourself into the comfortable pink pillows and duvet growing stronger with each passing second. 
Angel must have been able to tell when he finally emerged, turning on some music to a volume that was just loud enough you couldn’t dismiss it as background noise before revealing a joint from behind his back with a flourish.
“Ta-da! Those bitches really think they got the last of it, but they’ll never find my break in case of emergency stash,” he mused with pride, nearly jumping on the bed to wake you up. 
He wasted no time in lighting a match from a pack on his nightstand, igniting the paper and taking a couple hits until a sufficient burn was glowing in a thin line of red. At which point he passed it to you, exhaling with a turn of his head. So polite.
This was far from your first time, but it had been a while since you last done this with a friend. You opted for a long drag and held in the smoke, nearly sighing as you felt the drug kick in after a second. Welcoming the warm, floating feeling in your head with a lazy smile as you emptied your lungs.
Angel whistled, impressed. “Not even the tiniest cough! My kinda gal. We shoulda done this ages ago.”
You nodded your head, passing it back to him as you laid down; sinking into the plush pillows with a hum. He followed suit, taking another hit and blowing the smoke your way with a teasing look on his face. You couldn’t help but giggle, both from the high and Angel’s comforting presence. Time passed for a while this way, taking turns with the joint and listening to music. Little laughing fits when you made eye contact for too long or muttered Val’s hat. Cuddling with his darling little pet pig, Fat Nuggets.
But once you had taken the last drag there was a shift. He was staring at you, waiting with the most open and soft face. The question on it the one you could no longer avoid. So what happened?
It took all you had not to cry. In fact, you were amazed at the capacity of tears your body had rendered over the past week. How could there still be any more left to give? But there was. At this point you weren’t sure whether they were coming from a place of anger, shame, or heartbreak. When it came to Alastor, you found your emotions had chasms deeper than you ever conceived. And they were more oppressive the further you went.
“Valentino didn’t tell you anything?”
Angel shook his head and made a face, landing somewhere between exhaustion and exasperation. “Sort of. You know how those fuckers like to play their little games. He keeps waitin’ for me to say somethin’, but I prefer to watch him squirm.”
Though you worried for him and hoped some part of Alastor’s deal held up in his favor, starting there would be a good place to start; leading him through the whole affair at the penthouse that you were present for. Not missing the sad look in Angel’s eyes when you finally got around to Valentino licking your neck. 
When you began to tell him about what happened once you got back to the hotel his eyes went wide. The scandalized scoff and I can’t fucking believe you sparkle in his eyes made you blush before you both erupted in a cackle, a form of pride shining through storm clouds of melancholy. You knew he would have burning questions and answered them as they came up.
Is he big? Yes.
Rough? No, until he was. 
Maybe even just a tad over. There were still some decent bruises to show for it. On top of which, the bite was taking a little longer to heal than expected…
You were snapped back by Angel’s next question.
Was it good? …the best. In fact, had you ever experienced that in life you would’ve found yourself here immediately after.
The last one had you both squealing. But he could see the tears blurring your eyes afterward, holding your hands as you continued. From waking up in his bed that evening, what happened in it, all the way through the fight the following morning.
“Fuck,” he sighed, the empathy on his face threatening to make you break down all over again. “Would you have done it without the pheromones?” 
Your lips quivered a bit, and you let out a shaky breath as you fought to remain composed before answering with a nod. “But he wouldn’t have… and now…”
The sob that followed took you by force, fueled by the loneliness you’ve been losing battles to all week. Angel hushed you when you tried to apologize, holding your hands until you were done. He left you momentarily to get you tissues and returned in pajamas; a box and large t-shirt in hand.
You took them, going for the tissues first. Turning away to clean your face and blow your nose. It was not a bodily function you ever cared for, so of course it was something you still had to deal with in Hell. Afterward you undressed and put on the oversized shirt, immediately feeling much better by the time you rejoined Angel in your former positions.
“Keep goin’,” he said, shifting some pillows to get more comfortable. “We gotta get this off that sweet chest’a yours.”
“Are you sure…? I don’t wanna bum you out too much.” 
He waved his hand, and raised his eyebrows. The expectant look on his face practically shouting get on with it. You put a hand up in defeat and exhaled.
“I just… wish he would let me leave, you know? Even though I can’t imagine not being here with you and everyone else but… I can barely make it to the garden before I start to feel the tug.” Your hand went up to your throat as you swallowed. 
You hadn’t meant to, but you didn’t mention the chain during your recall of the fight. He would understand, you knew, but… you kept it to yourself. It was hard to reason why. All you knew was that for now, it wasn’t something you wanted anyone to know about.
“He’s got me trapped here and I swear it’s like I can feel him all the time even though we’ve been avoiding each other all week,” you bemoaned, squeezing your eyes shut to fight back another wave of tears. The look on Angel’s face told you all you needed to know when you opened them again. He knew. “Is it bad that I miss him? I’m… fucking mad at him too, but… I miss him more than I thought I would…”
It was a painful admission, but an honest one. 
Angel wiped a stray tear from your cheek before running his fingers through your hair. Sighing before he said, just above a whisper, “No. It’s not bad that you miss him. But you know it’s…,” he sighed again searching for the right words. An almost tired look on his face. “Guys like them… they think they can just treat us like toys. But we ain’t. Alastor might be pissed off now but it’s only a matter of time before he’ll want you for something. That’s how it works.”
He practically spat the word out, voice rising slightly with indignant fire. 
“I can’t say I know what he’s thinkin’ — no one understands that mind’a his. But he’s been… different since the fight. We all thought he was startin’ to come around! I think you’ve been a nice little distraction.”
The pinch to your cheek was a welcome dose of levity, and your chest bloomed with warmth at the sight of Angel’s mischievous face. Though his eyes were still a bit somber as his mouth relaxed into a soft smile.
“I guess what I’m tryin’ to say is, as long as you know what you want and what you’re gettin’ into… No one here would think any less of you for it. There’s only so much you can do. I know.”
You let the words sink in as you wriggled closer to him, sighing a thank you into the comforting fluff of his chest as his arms wrapped around you. Not that you needed permission, but his blessing and understanding of your feelings carried a weight you weren’t sure he fully realized. The sun breaking through the clouds.
Angel played with your hair as the two of you changed topics, talking aimlessly about other things going on around the hotel that you had been too tired to notice. Gossiping and laughing until sleep finally crept up on you. For the first time in a week, your dreams had been light and kind. Dancing with static, familiar red eyes, and a radiant fanged smile.
Oblivious to the idea that was hatching in Angel’s mind as you fell asleep, the glint in his eye was wicked and determined. Overlords weren’t the only ones who knew how to play games.
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Days of the week didn’t hold the same kind of power in Hell as they did on Earth. But for the first time in years Alastor found himself growing impatient for evening’s approach. Akin to an itch, there had been a persistent irritation running through him. Something he managed to push to his feet at first but was steadily crawling up, leaving pinpricks of restlessness it its wake.
The nervousness was finding outlets in peculiar ways. Mindlessly shaking his leg for unknowable amounts of time, snapping pencils as he tried to focus on work. Clothes strewn about his room like the vines that adorned the radio tower.
Weekends weren’t a concept that existed here, and even if they did, they would mean quite little to the Overlord as his work was never finished. Splitting time between his duties to the hotel and his radio segments kept him more than occupied. Well… when he wanted them too, at least. He had been letting the side down these past couple weeks. Following his flights of fancy was one of the lingering pieces of his humanity that refused to leave him even after all this time. In fact, it was a trait that found more enabling here than it ever had in life.
All of this to say, Alastor didn’t place significance in time or days of the week unless there was an event or some tiresome chore tied to it. 
Tonight was one of those times. 
Charlie and Vaggie had gathered the residents yesterday to announce that they had a surprise planned — a Friday night out, since the pair had missed it the last time due to their appointment in Heaven. Alastor had been listening from the banister a few floors up, watching as everyone reacted with relative enthusiasm. Except for you.
Had he not heard the words with his own ears, he’d have thought you’d been told you were attending a funeral. This hadn’t been the first time he’d eavesdropped on the daily activities gathering, but it was the first time he’d had his interest peaked. Not because he was concerned with you going out — you weren’t allowed that right now. And knew it.
Watching you squirm was something he’d never tire of. It was a subtle tell, which is why Alastor appreciated it. Just a touch of additional tension between your brows and a fiddling of fingers. That perpetual pout and concentrated look in your eyes were distracting enough to maintain focus, easily deterring others from picking up on your nervous fidgeting.
Still marinating in the bitterness of the week, it brought him a keen satisfaction seeing you struggle to think up an excuse as to why you couldn’t join them on their evening out. Would you blame it on him? Or put it upon yourself? 
“I hope you all have a great time! But I think I’ll hang back… I’d hate to be the sad drunk at the sex club.”
Is that what the establishment Consent was? 
If Alastor hadn’t already shortened your leash, he would have done it now. Not even realizing his claws had dug into the bannister until he felt the recoil when he tried to walk away. An irritated growl reverberating in his throat as the heat of his shortened temper fogged his mind. So he melted into shadow to retreat back to the privacy of his room to let off steam.
And so, Friday evening had plagued him ever since. The hotel now empty save for the two of you.
It was a thought that shouldn’t have riled him up the way it did. He was still rather cross with you for instigating that fight, after all. You had laid misery at his feet and he’d be remiss to not return the favor. It had been warranted.
The intention of isolating you from him was supposed to be your punishment, but had somehow become his as well. It was infuriating. Another example of how his plans of late continued to backfire and leave him scrambling to figure out a clean escape.
It hadn’t come to him as easily this time. Drowning his agitation in liquor, hours of pointless gardening in his sanctuary just to keep his hands busy. Listlessly sitting at the bench of his piano, staring at the keys with hesitant hands. Any music he did manage to play, while passionate, was acrid and only further soured his mood. The bitter notes mingling in the air with what was left of your scent. Mocking.
Exhausting.
He felt now very much the same as he had right after the battle with Heaven, recovering from the ghastly wound Adam had landed on him. Alone. Made aimless in recovery. Back to square one. 
Alastor’s antlers branched out at the memory, a snarl on his lips as he paced through trees and shrubbery. It was a low point he thought he’d never suffer again, yet here he was. A sulking menace, same as you.
Despite best efforts, he had combed over the fight more times than he could count these last few days. Which of his actions had mislead you to such a conclusion that the copulation had been nothing but a game? Is that the kind of man you took him for? His blood burned again at the very notion, eyes radiating with such a heat he couldn’t believe the grass in its wake hadn’t shriveled from it.
He had taken advantage of your offer, but his desire to have you was something he had already been struggling with. Was that not apparent in how hard he fought to maintain a gentle touch? At least until he couldn’t? Even if your docile face hadn’t told him how needed that was, it was something he could feel. And something he more than willing to indulge. He had always been a hunter.
But his hand had been forced that time, and that was something he couldn’t forgive. No matter your willingness to participate nor the pleasure he had felt in claiming your body. 
The second time…
That had been his decision. Though your laugh was the trigger. 
Alastor wasn’t lying when he said he thought you didn’t know how. Yet there it was, hiding in your chest, those sweet chords of mirth falling from your mouth with a nonchalance that was almost offensive. Your lips turned up in an equally rare display, eyes sparkling in his partially lit room as you sat in his bed, bundled up in his housecoat.
It haunted him now.
But in the moment, his mind had gone blank, so surprised by the honest show of emotion from you. He himself was prone to a more orchestrated laugh, so he knew. It had been real. You had laughed for him. Let him burrow just a little further into your soul that you kept so guarded, despite the fact that he owned it.
You were the goldfish enticing him behind your glass bowl as if he were a cat that was afraid to get wet. 
He wasn’t.
Honestly, he hadn’t planned to bed you again so soon. In fact, he had felt rather sated from the exploits of the afternoon, despite his reservations for how it came about; more than content to let you sleep while he read his book. Knowing you’d eventually be waking up from the pain of his bite, he kept you close. Glancing over every now and then between passages to look at your sleeping face.
Even in sleep those downturned lips of yours taunted him. He had even touched them. The plush softness under his thumb a sensation he didn’t think he’d enjoy as much as he did with a clear head. He watched as the knot in your brow melted away, the swell in his chest giving him little reason not to do it again. So he did. You looked so peaceful it almost made him want to join you, but he wasn’t ready to entertain that just yet. Eventually rewarded for his abstinence with being able to watch you come back to life, petulance and all. 
And then you laughed. 
Laughter was something he heard all the time around this fatuous hotel. And he had certainly heard more than his fair share of cackles. None of which had moved him. Well… 
Getting Husker to laugh for the first time was an accomplishment. Those were still hard to come by, despite the amount of time they’ve known each other.
But that had been a game Alastor was actively playing. He had never set out to make you laugh (even when he said he was). Being the spoilsport — childish but true — you were, you were too much fun to tease to put an effort into making you laugh.  
What a golden little sound it was; lighthearted but just incredulous enough to make his cock twitch. So… no. It hadn’t been the pheromones the second time.
He wanted that. He… enjoyed that. 
He still wanted that, though he didn’t fully understand why. You just seemed to… set something off in him. A difficult thing to articulate, as he hadn’t ever really felt something like it before. Not this acutely.
Possessiveness, sure. Alastor wasn’t ashamed to admit to that. Was it so wrong to want to hold tightly to what was so hard-earned? He had broken his back to gain the reputation he had, and would never regret the choices made to get here. Save for one. But that was beside the point. For now.
What he felt for you was different, again, just in a way he was unsure of. Not love… he wasn’t a boy. It was much too soon for a word like that. But there was certainly a longing… a fondness. 
It had been your scent that intrigued him at first. He had made his peace with that. Enjoyed his little games in testing how your mood would change it, which aided in his desire to wipe that frown off your face. A flash of how you looked laying beneath him came to the front of his mind then, and Alastor gave his head a harsh jerk to vanish it. Though it didn’t help clear the phantom echos of your cries and moans now ringing in his ears.
You had surrendered to him so completely, given him your trust so fully that afternoon that you even endured that ferocious bite with nothing but a scream into the pillows. Letting him claim you in the way he needed to in that moment was no small feat. But you did. He didn’t whisper apologies on a whim. You had earned it.
Irritation was building up in him again, a growl rumbling in his chest as his jaw tightened and antlers creaked with growth. But he persevered, continuing down his train of thought as his legs kept up their restless strides. It was the closest he had felt to something akin to clarity all week.
While he had definitely enjoyed fucking you, there was more to it than that. He wouldn’t have given himself to you in the first place if you hadn’t appealed to him in other ways leading up to it.
Rigidity, diligence, sullenness. Pride, even. 
Despite the more irksome traits, one thing he could always count on was that you would complete the tasks given to you well. A hard thing to come by in this godforsaken place.
But there was a fierceness hiding underneath that you refused to let loose, unless of course you were giving him attitude. That, in particular, drove him rather mad but he couldn’t deny that he enjoyed it. He had grown rather accustomed to navigating you in such a short span of time. It wasn’t lost on him that you had done the same.
You had shown him quite a few times how willing you were to accept even the harsher side of his moods. That evening in his room when Angel had told him about Valentino was a prime example. You had been absolutely terrified — something he was able to see on your face and smell — yet you still showed up the following morning. Impressing him, in a way, with the gall you had to actually enter his suite without permission. He would have chuckled at the memory if he wasn’t on the verge of punching something.
That morning had been the first time he took notice of how you went about cleaning his room, taking extra care with how you made his bed that he hardly ever slept in. So much wasted effort for the both of you, but Alastor didn’t regret it. Even though that bed had become the bane of his existence, mocking him any time he was in the room.
Why did you care so much? 
Irritation turned to anger at the thought, meaning he was on the right track. You were asking him the wrong questions the morning you fought, but you had been justified on some fronts. He had done nothing but push your buttons since bringing you here. Made you do pointless things just to see if you would and test how long he could get away with it before you snapped; purposeful choices made so that he could in turn punish you for being disobedient.
Not that his desire to punish you was your fault. It wasn’t. And if he was being honest, you hadn’t presented him many opportunities to do so anyway. Diligence.
He wanted to move past it, but he was still so twisted up about how everything happened with the battle against Adam and the Exorcists a few weeks ago. To the point where sometimes he wished Adam actually had taken him out. To be nothing but a discorporated soul clinging to life in some inanimate object, indulging in the peace of such an existence. No more fighting, no more posturing, no more leash. 
But he retreated before Adam could finish the job. His instinct to survive persevering once again. No… It was his ego, not his instinct, that had made that choice. Though if it hadn’t well… He wouldn’t have been able to go to Rosie’s that fated afternoon, would he? You were a burden he hadn’t wanted to undertake and had no choice but to. And yet you fit yourself into his routine as if you’d been tending to him for decades.
Why did you care so much?
Could you tell that he was struggling in the never-ending war against his own vanity? That he was dejected from losing a fight in what seemed like near self-sacrifice from the outside? Some part of you must have. Why else would you let him bully you, only to turn around and address his needs with a consistency that alarmed him. Let him prod and hold and touch you at his whim, much like the microphone that never left his side. 
Another loss he hadn’t recovered from. Its splintered form now buried at the base of a tree in his secondary room. The shame of seeing it lying around his suite or the radio tower while he failed to mend it too much to bear. A contemptuous symbol of who he was and what he had been reduced to.
Exhausting…
He hadn’t even noticed that he was walking to your room before he was standing in front of the door. Alastor would be lying if he said he thought you would be the one to come to him.
You always took the wrong things to heart.
✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧     ✧     ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧
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heich0e · 6 months ago
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hands and knees liv for knight osamu PLS
ask game: a christmas drabble from an established AU AU: the witch's song
osamu slumps down in his seat, a chill stuck so deep in the marrow of his bones he doubts that even the fire burning on the hearth across the room has any hope of easing it. he sniffles, running his hand over his bicep in hopes of speeding up the process of thawing himself out.
"it's FREEZIN' out there," atsumu, his brother, laments loudly in the seat across from him. his nose and ears are pink in a way osamu can only assume his own features mirror—they're twins, after all—and his hair is matted down to his forehead since the snowflakes previously resting in the strands have melted into nothing. atsumu's complaints persist, even as he scrubs at his running nose. "can't believe we're stuck in this shithole overnight."
"s'not so bad," osamu replies, even if he is half-frozen in his seat. "be grateful we managed to get ourselves a room, wouldja?"
not even his brother can argue with that—though he is so very good at it. the inn they'd found in this little village so far from the palace is full to bursting, the tavern around them bustling with activity from the guests and townspeople alike—if not for the knights' crest embroidered on their cloaks when they stumbled in from the blizzard outside, it's unlikely they'd have been offered lodging at all.
"how far are we from home?" atsumu asks instead of refuting his brother's point, picking up his tankard and taking a long swig of his ale.
"about a day's ride in good weather, a week's in whatever you call this," suna remarks dryly from his seat at the round table between the two twins, not bothering to look up from map in his hands. "even if the storm clears overnight, the path back will be treacherous with the snow. it'll take us two days at least to get through."
"two days?" atsumu whines. "yer kiddin'!"
suna looks at him with an expression that clearly conveys that he's doing nothing of the sort.
atsumu grumbles something under his breath, tipping his tankard back again to drain it.
"hope gin's doing alright in the storm," suna remarks, glancing out the tavern's cross-hatched windows into the stormy night.
gin had been sent ahead of the rest of them to report the knights' delay to the king. he was the best rider among them, and grew up in the northern corner of the kingdom where storms like this one were common, so of the four he was the best suited for the task. osamu wasn't so worried about him, even with the snow falling so heavily.
a man passes by the knights' table, rattling it a little. osamu shoots the ruddy cheeked man a warning glance, but the glazed-eyed look that meets him tells him that the guy's too drunk to heed any kind of warning. he stumbles away without so much as an apology, joining another rowdy group of men across the crowded room.
"you'd swear they'd never had a witch hunt around here, the way they're carryin' on."
osamu looks over at his brother, who'd been similarly surveying the room. half the town seemed to be packed into the inn's tavern, and all the boarding guests along with them.
"it's been over a decade since a witch was found in this county," suna remarks. "you know these kinds of things always draw a crowd."
"not like we even caught one," atsumu snorts wryly. "doubt there was even one here to begin with."
he's not wrong. neither of them are. the knights had been dispatched to investigate the rumours circulating in a little village half a day's ride away from where they presently find themselves about the appearance of a witch, but in the days they'd spent investigating they'd found little tangible evidence to prove it.
there's no such things as witches in this kingdom.
not anymore, at least.
but still, the king had to do his due diligence���sending a group of his men to dig into the whispers that had made their way back to the court. the storm had been the only unexpected part of their trip.
"hey sunarin, go get us another round," atsumu says, setting his empty tankard back down against the tabletop.
"fat chance," suna replies. "get your own."
"i'm still too cold to move," atsumu protests. he turns his attention to his brother, trying his luck there. "samu?"
osamu shakes his head. "tough."
"but you need a refill too!"
osamu glances down at the table towards his own beer—at least, the place where his beer ought to be—only to find the tankard missing. on the other side of the table, his brother sits with two empty tankards in front of him and a smug smile on his lips.
"you gluttonous little bast—!"
across the room, a sudden commotion catches all three knights' attention. a fight, possibly. maybe an accident. whatever it is, it sends all three men over to investigate, pushing their way through the crowd.
a man is sprawled on the ground unconscious when they manage to break through the fray, a mounted buck's head—or a previously mounted one—just beside him.
"what happened?" atsumu asks, surveying the scene—all of his childish petulance gone now as he assumes his duty.
"the twelve-point just fell off the wall outta nowhere! knocked the sucker out cold!" the barman who had clearly witnessed the ordeal explains, a bit incredulous. "that things been up there for half a century, must've come loose or something."
"serves the guy right considerin' how he was pawing at that poor girl," the young barback adds.
"girl?" suna asks.
"she was sittin' at the counter just a minute ago," the barback explains, looking around curiously. "the old drunk's been making passes at her all night."
"is she a guest?"
"she was," the barman explains. "checked out just now."
"checked out?" osamu asks incredulously. "she went out in this weather?"
the barman shrugs. "didn't ask."
osamu's head whips around as suna and atsumu continue trying to control the crowd, and get the unconscious man seen to.
across the room, osamu sees a figure slipping out into the night—the winter wind rushing in as they pull the door open. the hood of their cloak blows back, and reveals just the profile of their face.
a woman.
osamu freezes in place, watching as you turn and cast one last glance around the room. if you see him watching you, your eyes don't linger, and before he knows it you've slipped out into the night, the edges of your deep blue cloak trailing behind like curling tendrils of smoke.
he's following you out into the storm before he even has the chance to think.
it's quiet outside once the door slams closed behind him; a stark but welcome difference to the activity that rages on inside the inn.
it hasn't been long since osamu was last out, but somehow everything about the village seems stiller now around him. more peaceful. it's welcome, he thinks, even as the falling snowflakes land against his skin and melt into the warmth of his flushed cheeks.
he looks around for any sign of you. for any glimpse of that figure he'd come chasing after, but there's nothing.
not even a set of footprints in the fresh snow.
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conundrumoftime · 6 months ago
Text
frosts are slain and flowers begotten
A story for @arafinwean-week: Galadriel in the Second Age. (1200 words, G; also on AO3)
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On the first day of snow that winter Celebrían rises before the sun does. She refuses to be still, refuses to sit for breakfast, dances through the halls like a whirling silver blizzard herself, so entranced by the dazzling white landscape outside that she cares for nothing else. The past few winters in Ost-in-Edhil have been mild; this will be the first year she is old enough to play at sledges and snowball-fights with the other children and she is delighted beyond words.
Galadriel finds it harder to wake that morning. Dreams seem to weigh more heavily on her lately and prove themselves more reluctant to depart come the dawn. Waking to the sound of her daughter’s chatter proves a greatly-needed reassurance after the visions the night brought, but her thoughts remain sluggish and dulled, her mind as muffled as the snow-quiet city outside. 
When she gathers together enough of herself to rise from the soft unfocused warmth of her bed, she finds Celebrían kneeling on the window-seat of the solar with her palms pressed to the glass, watching the snow outside while Celeborn combs through her hair. Below, the streets and squares of Ost-in-Edhil are blanketed in white. A few trails of faint cart-wheels mark the passage of those who have already begun the day. 
“Gloves,” Galadriel says. “And keep them on.”
Her daughter nods with enough force that even her tiny shoulders are caught up in it. Celeborn stills the comb until she is settled again and then resumes where he left off, lifting sections from the front to pull into the start of a simple braid. His lips do not move but his voice sounds clear in Galadriel’s mind: is all well?
Nothing. Dreams.
Not a convincing answer but he does not say so. Instead he nods, small enough to be imperceptible to Celebrían even if she were paying attention, and continues the fast work he is making of her hair.
The three of them walk down to the south fountain square together. Celebrían does not take long to find her footing in the snow, balancing on the tops of walls and leaping frozen puddles, flopping down belly-first into low snowdrifts with the other children. She is fascinated, and she is young enough that her way to be fascinated with things is to let them swallow her up whole. 
It is a fine morning. The sky is a sharp clear blue now, the sunlight dancing in the captured light of icicles and frost-rimmed leaves. Galadriel settles herself on a stone bench beside the frozen fountain and watches as Celebrían and the other children race around in whirling chaos.
There is safety here and happiness and her daughter’s hands are warm inside fine leather gloves cuffed with fur, and still Galadriel cannot shake the previous night’s dream. It had been a cloud of images and sensations rather than anything clear: hunger, sorrow. Little Idril’s golden hair matted with ice. Polished aquamarines spilled in the snow. 
Celeborn comes to join her after a while spent talking with some of the others, gathering now in groups of four or five to watch the children play. These are friends – and her friends – but she is too much in the past this morning to wish for their company.
“Guards caught a wolf out near the bridge pastures,” he says, kicking the heel of his boot against the stone to shake off the packed snow.
“So far south?”
“It’s a bad winter, they’re hungry.”
He may not seem troubled but she feels this news to be an ill omen all the same. She has dreamed of wolves here before, wolves circling the fortressed walls of the city in great packs. There is no threat; they are at peace; in Eregion she has what she wanted, what she came to Middle-earth to find; but something in her remains unsettled. 
“We used wolf fur for our clothes on the ice,” she says. “We lined the edges of our hoods with it to keep off the wind.” She remembers fastening little Idril’s with a cloak-pin, the child no older than Celebrían is now tipping up her chin and refusing to cry. 
“You were dreaming of it again,” he says. 
She finds a smile for this. “So obvious?”
“Only when you talk of ice-floes in your sleep.”
She has woken him before - sometimes unintentionally, sometimes in a desperate need to tell him of an unformed fear for the future that has seized her. Others call it foresight but she never has; it is not clear enough, never clear enough. Sorrows of the past and fears of the future and she cannot tell one from the other.
“I dreamed of a necklace I broke,” she says. “It was the first year, I think – maybe the second. I needed the chain to mend a quiver and I let the beads fall into the snow. We were desperate then and so poorly prepared for what we faced that it seemed near impossible to go on. But I looked down at those beads and found that I did not wish to leave them after all, and so I picked them up and cleared the snow from them and carried them with me. The next year I made a new quiver that would not grow brittle and break in the cold and I sewed the beads onto that. It lasted me many years. I don’t know what it means that I should dream of this now.”
He weighs the thought of this as though she has given him a riddle to solve, which she supposes she has. It is a comfort that he never finds her dreams and visions unsettling but it has always troubled her too that he should find them so easy to accept as a part of her. “Perhaps good things. Perhaps that you found hope and beauty still.”
They are interrupted by Celebrían springing up onto the stone between them, her eyes wild and fierce. “We are making a great serpent out of snow,” she announces. “I am looking for eyes.” And then she steps out onto the frozen surface of the fountain’s pool.
There cannot be more than a couple of inches of water beneath the snow and likely it is frozen solid by now anyway, and yet Galadriel feels absolute terror seize her at the thought of it: the ice will break, the sea beneath will never return what it takes. “No,” she barks, lifting Celebrían down in the curve of her arm, “never walk on ice, what were you thinking?”
Celebrían, entirely unused to harsh words, gazes up in shock. 
“Here,” Celeborn says, taking off one of the rings he wears. “An eye for your snow-serpent.” 
It’s a new ring that the mírdain made for him, a round opal with reds and yellows meant to capture the colours of beech-woods in autumn. In Celebrían’s gloved hand its gold rim of it catches the sun’s light and seems to burn like fire. She is delighted and all thoughts of the scolding are fast forgotten; she tugs at her father’s arm demanding he come with her to set it in place.
Be at peace, Galadriel, Celeborn’s voice sounds in her mind as he allows their daughter to drag him to his feet. It is winter; but it is only winter. Spring will come. 
Spring and what else, she thinks. 
That night she dreams of Idril again standing at the shores of a sea. This time Celebrían is with her too, pale as a spirit as she leans into Idril’s shoulder. “I will hold you up,” Idril is telling her. “Spring will come again.” And whether to call this foresight or fear or hope, Galadriel cannot say.
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oceansssblue · 6 months ago
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From the stuck in a snowstorm Christmas prompt:
Can I get Rex X Male Reader where they get separated from Anakin, Ahsoka and Obi-Wan during a mission and are forced to hide in a cave till the storm ends please?
Male Reader is injured from saving Rex’s life from a droid attack and Rex is using all his willpower to not think about what would have happened if he lost him.
The angst buildup to confessing your feelings is the best type of word food.
Your wishes are my orders... Let's jump with the prompt number 9 (stuck in a snow storm) rn! 🫡
I write original ideas but I swear I like the classics and basics so much too... 🤪
Enjoy!
Xx, Blue. 💖
PS. For those who may be wanting to do a request, I'm leaving you the list of prompts at the end of this oneshot if you want to check it out. I also accept your own request ideas as long as it's xmasy.
"THE MOST IMPORTANT THING" – REX / MALE READER 💔💖
WARNINGS: fleeting mentions of wounds & blood. Thoughts about almost losing someone. Snow storm & freezing temperatures. Comfort & first kiss.
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Rex can barely see what's five steps ahead of him. Even with the improved vision provided by his helmet, the blizzard makes everything blurry; a white picture of snow that would have been beautiful if it hadn't turned into a storm –and Rex needn't to make his way across it in order to get to safety–. His objective is to find cover in the mountains; but even if they appear to be close in distance, it's not an easy task to acomplish. He has to fight each step of the way; his lower legs sinking on the snow as he walks and making it incredibly tiring to advance forwards. He can't stop, though. You can't.
You're injured; arm drapped over his shoulders and finding strength in the Force to not let yourself drop unconscious. It's tempting; but you refuse to succumb to blood loss and fatigue. You refuse to be a dead weight for the captain to carry. You know he's worried enough as it is.
All four Jedis assigned to this mission had worn some sort of armour for the 501st, 212th, and 464th's batallions relief; but armour isn't undestructible, and it doesn't completely cover one's body. There's always vulnerable spots required for movility; and a droid had managed to get you on one of those. By pure luck, the captain is sure. Tinnies can't aim with that sniper-like precision. It's why so many of them are needed to make one clone's work.
Even with three battalions meshed together, the army sent by the Separatists had been massive. The fight had prolonged for over a week; and at one point, Rex had been surrounded by ten droids at once. Trying to command his men at the same time, making his orders known over the sound of blasterfire and explosions, he hadn't noticed a droid attacking him from his dead angle of vision; and it was then when you had jumped in to save him. When Rex had twisted around in surprise and had seen the frizzed cloth in the gap between your chest and abdomen plates he had almost pannicked; but you had shot him a calming –and pained– smile and assured him it was just a superficial wound before dodging another attack and pushing forward. Rex had had to force himself to concentrate throughout the rest of the battle. To not think on the implications of your acts; of what could have been.
But here, with none of his men at his sides and no trace of Anakin, Obi-Wan and Ashoka –they had all splitted into pairs in order to scout the city after the end of the battle when the snow storm had surprised them–, he has nothing to distract him from said thoughts.
You could have died. Jedi, for all of Anakin's recklesness, aren't inmortal; he could have lost you. Forever; a permanent absense and void in his heart no one would be able to cure. All those little things Rex always looks forward too —a cup of hot chocolate shared after a hard mission, the way your face lit up and innocently waved when you saw him across the hangar, all the little spontaneous trips you insisted for him to acompany you around Coruscant, if only using an excuse to show Rex what life could be outside of war... All of that would dissapear, disolve as if it had never existed; and Rex would be left staring into nothing.
They finally reach the mountains; and after a little while longer, they find a safe spot for them to take refuge in. They almost stumble inside –both of their legs aching and trembling from the cold and effort by now–; but being protected from the harsh and unforgiving wind is an instant relief.
Rex helps you to sit down; and you stretch your legs on the rocky floor of the cave and let him tug you backwards so that your shoulders are able to rest against one of the walls. You're shivering; the freezing temperatures managing to slip under your armour and specially on your vulnerable open spot. It's not all bad, though; you guess that the combination of the quick self-cauterizing blaster shot and the cold have managed to sort of keep the wound in stasis. Your vision is blurry and blackening when you try to move your head around, though; you feel dizzy and weak too. You don't know if it's because the wound, the post-battle fatigue, the cold, or all of them combined.
"General?" You hear Rex's voice ask, and it's only then when you notice his voice sounds too close and clear and realize he has taken off his bucket. "I think you're a step away from frostbite. You should take the armour off; it's so cold it's making you more damage than good at this point, now that we're hiding here".
You nod distractedly. That makes sense, yeah. You move your right hand to the shoulder attachments of your chest plate; but your movements are too slugish to pry the seals apart. The Captain's hands gently tug yours away and he tries to do it instead.
"Let me help you, okay?" He asks, always a bit wary to touch you and cross the line between General and trooper –it had taken a really long time for him not to jump at your ocasional affectionate pat on the shoulder or squeeze on his arms–. "Just try... Try to stay with me, General".
You hum in agreement and close your eyes; following his gentle commands a bit too slow for Rex's taste. He carefully pries each plate from your body and sets it aside; packing it up in the same way all clones do with theirs. You don't even react when your wound is exposed to the cold air; but Rex is quick to cover it with a bacta patch anyways. Then goes the plates of your back; and youre finally left in the soft and comfortable tunic and unders you always wear for the battlefield.
A new wave of exhaustion hits you; and your body slumps forward, only saved from smashing into the ground by Rex's quick hand on your shoulder.
"Hey. Hey, General. Cyare don't... Don't leave me".
You can hear the fear in his voice. The pain. The panic.
Even if it's an almost impossible task, you manage to blink your eyes open if only just for his sake.
"m' not going anywhere, Rex. I just need to sleep" you mumble grogily, trying to control the way your mind spins.
Rex opens his mouth, ready to ask you to stay with him, to not leave him here; but you continue and reassure him.
"This' one of those times you're gonna' have to believe in the Jedi magic. M'not dying. I just need to sleep and connect with the Force".
Rex reluctantly –scared– nods. He knows you had received a different training from Anakin, Ashoka and Obi-Wan; the Jedis he's used to work with. But all Jedis are not the same. While the previous three had grown more focused on how to use the Force to fight, you had cultivated other aspects; telepathy, healing. Kit Fisto had been your master; and though he had definitly teached you the art of the lightsaber, he had also encouraged you to explore your gift for telepathy –he was a powerfull telepath too– and even offered you to spend a few years learning Force Healing under the supervision of Jedi Stass Allie in the Temple. You had once explained to him you were nowhere close to be considered an expert on such themes; but that you could at least accelerate the curative progression of wounds a bit, if only enough to evade the risk of inminent death.
Rex doesn't need your skin to be completely closed and looking as if the shot had never happened; he had enough with avoiding your loss for now.
"Okay" he whispers back with a shuddering breath. "I'll let you sleep, then. Just let me... Let me hold you against me. You're still freezing and I don't want to risk it while we both rest".
"Kay" you mumble in response, closing your eyes again and dropping your head back against the wall. "But hurry up, my brain's fuzzy".
Rex nods and rushes to take his own armour off; staying in his blacks and taking a seat by your side, with his back against the wall. He then burries his thoughts about rules and impropiate gestures and pushes an arm under your knees; the other one around your torso, and then he uses a small burst of energy and tugs you towards him so that you're resting in his lap, between his crossed legs.
You make a little surprised sound; but inmediately melt against him when he pulls a heating emergency blanket from his backpack and places it around your body. You hum feeling gratefull and cuddle closer to his chest; hiding your face in his neck and tugging the blanket closer to try to cover him as well.
His hands give you a soft squeeze. Shortly after, you surrender to unconsciousness.
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Rex has a lot of time to think until you wake up again between his arms.
He takes the moment of respite to breathe in your warmth and soothe his stressed mind; his galoping heart. It was terrifying, almost losing you; but you're safe now. Your breathing has eased with time; your deep, pained frown slowly relaxing and an almost peacefull expresion making its way across your face.
It's still a huge relief for him when you groan and open your eyes; blinking slowly to try to make a picture of whats happening and where you are.
Rex only softens his hold on your body so that you can sit down straigther and turn around to face him. You stretch your neck and shoot him a tired but warm smile.
"Hey" the captain rasps. "How are you feeling?"
You glance down at your dressed wound and take a moment to analyse yourself. You're still tired, and your muscles ache, and you're in desperate need of some water and a shower; but here in Rex's lap, you can't help but feel content and safe.
"Better" you decide to answer, smiling softly. "You?"
Rex tries to give you a tiny smile; but it's such a pained, little unsure thing that it tugs at your heart.
"I'm fine" he answers, one of his hands carefully caressing up and down your back under the blanket.
You shove down a pleasant shiver and tilt your head to the side.
"I don't have to be a Jedi to know that's a lie" you tell him cautiously, your own hands travelling down to catch his with yours. "Tell me, if you want?"
Rex stares at you for a few seconds and sighs.
"You shouldn't have jumped in to save me" he starts, glancing down at your hands, unable to hold the weight of your beautiful eyes on his while he confesses this. "You're one in a million. A Jedi General. Hundreds of lifes depend on yours. Mine is replacable. I'm not important, and you..."
"You're the most important thing in mine".
It's soft and sweet; the way you finally tell him what you've been keeping to your heart all this time. What you've been struggling with.
"What?"
Rex has the most cute stunned and confused face you've seen before. His eyes lock onto yours inmediately; almost not believing your words, like needing to check you've really said that to him. That you mean it.
You smile wistfully and squeeze his hands. They're rough, callous formed on the spots where his skin frictions with his favorite pair of DC-blasters; the hands of a soldier that hasn't had the chance to be anything else. It's why you have been trying to show him the rest of the world, the little pleasure that can be found in the simplest everyday things. He deserves it. All his brothers do.
"I have never wanted more than I had" you begin, deciding to finally bare your heart once and for all to him. "All I've ever wanted to do is help others, and I've grown up with that purpose without having nothing else to fight for. Nothing that I wanted for myself. No secret that I had to keep trapped inside ny mind or heart. Yet..."
You reach up to trace reverent fingertips over the captain's cheek. You feel his stuttering breath against your skin; smile at the loving, hopefull way his golden eyes are silently watching you.
"I want to keep you, Rex. Every morning I find myself expectant and tense until I see you in the distance. Everytime we're close, everytime we talk, it fills me with a comforting warmth" your eyes track a sinfull path through his lips. So tempting, so close to yours. You can't help yourself and trace a thumb over them. Rex gasps, and his eyes flicker through your face, his heart filling with devotion and passion too. "I want to burn, though. I've been trying to hold back, but I can't. I want to get closer. I want to kiss you. I want to be able to relax between your arms when everything gets to be too much. You might think that in the grand scale of things you're not important. Perhaps, seing it that way, none of us are. What I can tell you is my personal truth, your spot in my individual scale; and there's no other person I deem as important as you".
You're desperate to kiss him; but you feel like he wants to say something too, so you try to be patient and wait for him.
Rex cups one side of your face in his hand. It trembles. You understand the feeling; and smile encouragingly. You have been worried about mistaking his kidness for something more too; of crossing boundaries. But he has nothing to fear now. Still, you understand. Your heart is speeding up in your chest too; as it does with everything exciting and new. Your feelings for him aren't; but this closeness, the real posibility of kissing him for the first time, is.
"I've loved you for a long time now" he admits, voice gentle and firm despite his own nervousness. "Perhaps for as long as I've been able to understand what romantic love is. I... I'll be happy to have you, cyare. When you need me and when you don't, too".
His words shoot warmth and joy to every cell of your body; a radiant smile perching on your tired face.
"Can I kiss you?" He asks, bringing your face close to his with a gentle tug of your chin.
You smile and sigh.
"Yes..." you whisper over his lips. "Yeah".
THE END.
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Didn't I make you two cute? Aaaaah 💖 Hope you like it! Xx, Blue.
Still accepting Xmas requests, you can use any of this prompts (except 9) or one of your own!
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jacenbren · 2 years ago
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Deeply fucking unsettling things about the Honored One himself, Satoru Gojo
Thanks to his ability to fuck with gravity, you put him in a blank, empty room with identical walls, floor, and ceiling with no doors or windows, he'll quickly lose track of which way is up. Realistically this situation would probably never happen, but the concept freaks him out ever since Geto made a joke about it once.
Gojo's body maintains a perfect thermodynamic equilibrium, making his skin creepily cool to the touch. He can go out in a blizzard with shorts on, and between that and Infinity, he'd be perfectly fine. It makes for a cool party trick, because he can stick his hand in a candle flame or put cigarettes out on his arms with no ill effects.
He's unsettlingly clean at all times, because dirt can't touch him. Gojo hasn't needed to use stain remover on his uniform in years.
He quite literally has six eyes. He keeps four of them shut and all of them hidden most of the time, though, because a) looking into all six at once would liquefy the brain of your average human, and b) his Six Eyes are constantly feeding unfathomable amounts of information into his brain every second. Even with his tolerance to his powers and mastery of the reverse curse technique, there's only so much stimuli a human brain can process without completely shutting down, and Gojo doesn't want to find out what that'll do to him--in a nutshell, just because he can see things that mankind can't even hope to comprehend doesn't mean he wants to.
He can perceive the entire electromagnetic spectrum, meaning he can see shrimp colors. Everyone else desperately wants him to describe the shrimp colors. Gojo continues to smugly refuse.
Because of his reverse curse technique constantly refreshing and regenerating his body, he just. doesn't really need to eat anymore. or drink. or even breathe. His body is basically frozen at peak physical condition, and it's very likely that he is functionally immortal.
Sometimes, Gojo forgets what pain feels like, because nothing can touch him. Pain feels almost like pleasure to him, because nothing can hurt him. Nothing can even touch him, and Gojo has secretly developed a perverted interest in seeing how badly he can mutilate himself before he's forced to reengage his technique and heal.
Gojo can bend and contort himself in ways that aren't humanly possible, run faster and farther and lift heavier objects than anyone alive, because his body can repair itself almost as fast as it's damaged, depending on how severe the injury. Basically, he has permanent hysterical strength, letting him push his body past its limits to perform feats that would kill a normal human with no ill effects.
Gojo doesn't sleep. He literally can't unless he releases his technique, because his body is constantly being refreshed and doesn't need to shut down. Oh well, it's for the better. He's most vulnerable while he's sleeping anyway, and it opens up his schedule by a lot.
His teeth grow now, almost like a rodent's. He has to file them down to be able to open and close his mouth properly, along with much more frequent trimming of his hair and nails.
His skin is oddly smooth, and unnaturally pristine. Gojo hasn't recieved a single scar since Toji sliced him open, and all the ones he'd recieved before are healed flawlessly at this point. His hands are so soft they make it look like he hasn't fought a day in his life, because calluses aren't able to form anymore.
Gojo's been around the world countless times now. He can go wherever he wants with a thought; the only cost is his sanity. Warping himself across the Pacific for lunch in San Francisco is fun, but he can only do it a few times a week if he doesn't want to have another... ah, episode.
These episodes involve blackouts, gaps in his memory where his powers manage to slip their leashes from overuse and literally short-circuit his brain. He's only had a few so far, and every time, he wakes up in the infirmary completely unscathed, with blood all over his clothes and an awful fucking migraine. Nobody knows what happens or where he goes, and all Shoko's been able to tell him is that when it happens, he seems to go into a giddy fugue before blasting his way out of the compound and vanishing for anywhere from days to weeks. Gojo's absolutely terrified of these episodes, because he's wholly aware that if he lost it for real, nobody would be able to stop him.
He looks human enough, but if you look closer, he quickly starts to set off the uncanny valley effect. It's like a wolf in sheep's clothing--because you know how dangerous he is, even though he appears relatively harmless at first. Everyone who meets him has the same fear response clawing at the back of their mind as their hindbrain screams at them to fucking run, because Gojo is an apex predator in the body of a prey animal. His very presence awakens primal fear that's been entrenched in every human since the dawn of time--the fear of things that go bump in the night, of cosmic horrors beyond what mankind can even hope to comprehend.
His eyes glow all the time now, and the energy crackling in the air around him feels like the static that comes before a lightning strike. Satoru Gojo is insistent that he's still human even though he's the strongest, but... is he, really?
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