#weird pov decision because this started

[underdarken]

THE ASHES YOU LEFT. You are a born a daughter. This is the first great lie you endure, and you endure it for your family. Before you know yourself, you know you are leverage, the bargaining chip by which they might trade the fearful life of an Eastmyr commoner for the gilded, sanctified halls of the spider queen. By your goddess and your guardians, you are made for sacrifice.

You have a brother two decades your senior. Myziket is not home often, but when he is, you know what a patient, supportive bond can be. You are a withdrawn and vigilant child all the more when he leaves again. One day, he does not return. Your parents will not tell you why. You are now truly alone.

The seed of Myziket's kindness is planted nonetheless. You are age twelve when you begin to feel a new thing: rage. You are age twelve when you shred your clothes and fashion new ones from the remains. You are age twelve when you take your curls and nearly rend them from your head. ( You settle for binding them high and away. ) You are age twelve when the mirror tells you the smattering of freckling scales are darkening, toughening, noticeable beyond reckoning. You are age twelve when you call flame.

Their feeble pleas about your selfishness in doing this, as though the outliers in your identity are a conspiracy against them, are just that: feeble. Suddenly, your parents fear you. You are not a daughter. You are next to useless in their every ambitious scheme and demand. It is the first relief you have known in your life.

They must call for Vindolanax. The first time you meet him, it is years later. You are age sixteen. The time to elapse presents a new difficulty, and you are at the mercy of all that you feel and the consuming flame it tends to bring forward. Sometimes it serves you, and you are able to seize odd jobs that magic facilitates. Sometimes you feel it, steps away from irreversible disaster. You want desperately to control it with certainty, make it your armor and your gift, and not the other way around.

You come to know it is fortunate your parents are able to reach Vindolanax at all. He has not seen you since your infancy, and you know this to be true. You have no prior recollection of him. He is no mystery for long. He tells you that you have his blood in your veins, your mother his child, and share in his affinity for the arcane. He will help you to hone your skills if you will accept and travel with him.

This is what you want. This is not how you want it. You want Men./.zoberr./.anzan to be made to admit it was wrong about you, wrong to chew you up and spit you out. You want to spite your parents. You want to know your goddess's approval in place of her bloodied wrath.

You are a young fool with a spark of idealism resolutely in you. It will snuff out before long, and you will wish you had gone with him. You don't.

You stay. You work your jobs. You attain some skill. You venture farther into the wilds of the Under./.dark. You are age nineteen when you meet your first love. Even now, you do not have the heart to think of her name, but once, you could think of nothing else.

You are contracted to recover lost cargo and meet during the task. The journey is long, grueling, six months of unforeseen complications and expedition casualties. By the time its end approaches, the two of you are exhausted in every way but no less enamored with each other.

She does not survive the trip home.

You are inconsolable. You do not know how to speak of or show it. You don't. You return to the stifling house shared with your parents, but you learn the art of disappearance as Myziket did. You are gone more than you are there. You are busy more than you are idle. You are surviving. You must.

You are age twenty-two. You are a ragged wound waiting to tear fully open. The noblewoman is all too happy to do it for you. Your existence has been a shadow of someone like hers, her station alone designed to preserve the status quo. You should know better. She whispers promises of security, safety. Indefinite control of your gifts. She deceives you by delivering, the truth sprinkled in the lie. Another sorcerer in her employ begins to train you. You are afforded the facade of ease and respect by association. You are showered in her attentions and affections.

You pay her in the cinders of her rivals. You are now a condensed inferno. She wields you as a swordsman does a blade. Lie by comfortable lie, you let her until the inconvenience of your needs and wants wear at the foundation of your arrangement. You angle for your freedom and severance. She will grant it without prejudice, she says, if you complete one final task for her. You must get rid of her sister.

You are age twenty-eight. You stand in the mezzanine, watching the party. You are on the precipice of an unknown future. You are a mess of nerves and panic. You should have left then and tried again later. You don't. The flame intended for the sister catches and catches, the building and everyone in it. You do not stay for the outcome. You know you have blown all hopes of discretion and secrecy.

You lie low to regain your wits. You hear the story of a commoner's treachery on the streets. You know it is time to leave the city that raised and caged you. You can never return.

You are as fortunate to find Vindolanax as your parents were. You are numb when you arrive. He takes you into his many homes. You begin to know the other side of your family, hidden in these remote spaces. It is a quiet change of pace that allows you to sit with your life's worth of grief and rage. Your grandfather - for that is who he is, you realize - is a balm when you bluster and a support when you break. He offers to you again the wisdom you once declined. You accept. You wish you listened before.

You safeguard his sanctuaries and lairs from the ill intent of others. This is the most honest work you have done. Even feeling the ghost of the dagger in your back, you are nearly content here. Nearly is not the same as wholly.

Season bleeds into season, year into year. You are seventy-four. You begin your trial runs to the surface. You know on your next attempt, you will not return to the familiar shadows below. Your grandfather senses you are ready to move on. He encourages you to find your brother among the coastal cities.

You reel with the knowledge Myziket lives after all this time. Any sorrow you harbor for this departure melts away in hopes of a reunion in its place. When you go, you do not look back.

Maintaining communication with Vindolanax and now Myziket, you make your home and mercenary livelihood in the Gate. Your specialties are artifact location and reclamation, and bounty collection. You keep busy. You keep clients as contacts. You get paid. You are away from the city as often as you are within it.

You are one-hundred-and-twenty-four - and there is a strange airship on the horizon.

[idkwhatever580]

Are you f****** kidding me?!

Masterlist

Pairings: Natasha romanoff x reader

Prompt: y/n has very bad trauma with alcoholism in her family, so she never drinks. Natasha never pushes it and is always protective of her decisions but what happens when the boys play a little “prank”on y/n?

Warnings: trauma, ptsd in a way?, reader freaks out, getting drunk, spiked drinks, protective nat, swearing, mentions of sh, fake allergic reaction.

A/N: guys sometimes I’m not great at explaining things in the warnings. So I put a question mark lol. I hope y’all understand it though.

Y/n’s pov

Once again I’m at one of Tony’s parties. I think his excuse this week is his mom’s business partner’s daughter is having a birthday soon.

Whatever. There’s no point in actually caring it’s just another ploy for him to get drunk.

I usually leave before that time.

I start off my night with a water. I plan to finish the night with the same. Then suddenly Pietro comes up to me with Sam and says

“Hey y/n!”

I smile at him and notice he’s holding two drinks.

“Hey Piet. What are you doing?”

He smiles and says

“Bringing a drink to my favorite person.”

I roll my eyes at him. We get along because we like to prank people a lot. And play video games.

I frown as he hands me a drink and I say

“Piet you know I don’t drink”

He curses under his breath and says

“Oh right yeah! Let me take that and I’ll get you a virgin drink yeah?”

I nod my head and thank him as they both walk away. I guess Sam is just trailing along.

After a few minutes they come back and hand me a different drink and I say

“What is this?”

He looks at it and says

“A drink doofus”

I roll my eyes at his antics and say

“No I mean what’s in this drink?”

He looks at Sam and says

“It’s like a celcius!”

Sam agrees quickly and I say

“Oh. So like an energy drink?”

They both nod their head in unison and I smirk and say

“Thanks guys. You know I have a hard time with these things. Especially since nat is on a mission right now.”

Sam wanders off and Piet stays by me as I drink a few sips. It’s pretty good.

We talk a bit and Piet says

“How is that flavor? I have something else and I was just wondering.”

I smile and say

“It’s orange I think. Not the best but it’s decent.”

His eyes have a fire in them and he says

“Here! Why don’t I get you a different flavor?”

I nod and say

“I’m sure two wouldn’t hurt right? It’s only energy drinks and they don’t really affect me”

He nods and says he’ll be right back so I finish off my drink and wait for him.

When he comes back he has a slightly pink tinted drink for me and i immediately try it.

“This one is good!”

He nods his head.

I have about three of those drinks and I’m starting to feel great. My stomach hurts a bit but I feel fine.

And this girl is talking to me and her jokes are literally so funny. Like I have the giggles or something.

We start dancing and then I somehow end up with Wanda. We’re best friends but we are not leaving any room for Jesus. I usually don’t have this much fun at these parties.

Then I end up on a couch with another girl by my side and I’m just talking her ear off. She looks interested.

All of a sudden I get a rush of heat over my face. I just zone out trying to pinpoint what’s going on.

By now the girl has left and I see a flash of red come in my view.

“Y/n? Y/n detka focus on me. Where are you baby?”

My beautiful girlfriend Natasha pulls me from my trance and I throw myself on her and say

“Natty!!”

She lets me hug her and I get another rush of that feeling again.

She notices and says

“Are you alright?”

I nod my head and then think, and shake my head.

“What’s wrong detka?”

I lean on her shoulder as she sits next to me and I say

“I don’t know. I feel weird.”

Natasha looks at the table and sees three glasses and says

“Are those yours?”

I nod and smile

“Piet got me these three flavors of energy drinks. I can’t remember what he said they were called though. But he said they were like celcius”

She nods and grabs one of the glasses. She picks it up to her nose and smells it and sets it back down.

“Y/n you said you liked these? And you wanted them?”

I nod me head and say

“They were really yummy but I think they’re hurting my tummy a bit”

I pout and she looks to the side as if she’s scanning the crowd for someone. I follow her eyes and they land on Pietro and Sam who are giggling like teen girls. I slur out

“What are they laughing at natty?”

She looks to the side unsure of what to say and my eyes widen and I sit up. This realization has my mind sobered up a bit and I look at her with tears in my eyes.

“Nat? Is that alcohol?”

She bites her lip unsure of what to do but she nods her head and I say

“Pietro and Sam told me it wasn’t. They said they got me a virgin kind.”

She shakes her head and says

“I’m so sorry baby”

I shake my head and push her away. I immediately get up and walk off. I almost bump into a few people and I trip up a bit but not bad. I go straight to our room and Natasha decided to stay back to handle the perpetrators.

She makes sure Friday alerts her if I end up anywhere other than our room.

Nobody’s pov

To say Natasha was angry was an understatement.

She was furious.

She had to watch you storm off to probably go and cry because of what they did to you.

She stands up and brushes herself off. And then she calmly walks over to Pietro and Sam.

They say

“Oh hey nat! You’re back!”

Natasha smiles at them and says

“You wouldn’t happen to know what was in those drinks that you gave y/n would you?”

They shrug their shoulders and say

“What drinks? What are you talking about?”

Natasha is pissed so her patience is gone and she grabs them both by the ear and pulls them to the side of the room.

The noise isn’t any less quiet, it’s just out of the way.

And she goes ballistic.

“Are you fucking kidding me?! Do you know what you did to her?! Everybody knows that y/n doesn’t drink because of her fears that she will end up like her father. She’s probably in our room now panicking about how she’s an alcoholic from three drinks!! And you!”

She points to Pietro

“You know better than to do that! You know she has problems. And you still did that! I should have the both of you banned from stark parties forever! You both intentionally spiked her drink! You two are literally dead!”

By now the room is silent from how loud Natasha is screaming at them. All eyes are on them but she doesn’t care.

“She was your friend and you did this to her! That is the ultimate betrayal and I wouldn’t blame her if she never wants to see your faces again! Get out of here. I don’t want to see you at another party! And I expect there to be ample apologies tomorrow!”

They nod and scurry off. Wanda is behind natashw now and she gives her a look as if she’s asking if they really did that to you and Natasha nods her head.

Wanda’s eyes glow red and she walks off in Pietro direction.

After Natasha knows they’ll be handled she smooths out her shirt and looks around at everyone gawking at her.

She raises and eyebrow and says

“Would anybody like to go with them?”

They all shake their heads and go back to partying.

Natasha goes upstairs to find you in your room.

She slowly walks up to your ball of a self and says

“Y/n? Are you alright?”

Apparently she chose the wrong set of words because you shoot up and say

“No im not alright! How can I be alright?! I’m literally drunk because I’m a lightweight and I feel disgusting because I liked it. And that’s why I never drink because I’m just like my father and I’ll like that shit and I’ll probably get hooked on it now!”

You are pacing back and forth and your breathing is erratic so Natasha goes up and grabs you and says

“Woah woah woah. Detka please calm down. You need to hear me. You are not an alcoholic from getting drunk once. You know that you don’t drink and that you won’t drink. Just because you liked the alcohol does not mean you are hooked okay? You clearly don’t like being drunk at all because it is hurting you.”

You are now just standing in Natasha’s grasp as she speaks to you.

“And you are most definitely not your father. You know now to not trust them with drinks anymore. Listen. I’m so sorry they did that to you. But you need to know it is not your fault. At. All. They spiked your drink knowing that you don’t drink for a reason.”

Y/n’s pov

I nod my head taking in all this information. And I tear up a bit.

“Hey hey don’t cry baby. It’s okay. It’s not your fault”

I shake my head as some tears start to fall and I say

“No no. I’m not crying because of this. I’m crying because you’re so good to me. Nobody would have reassured me like this except you. I just love you so much.”

We both smile and kiss each other and then we pull away because there is a knock at the door and I softly say

“Come in”

Wanda steps in and says

“Hey. How are you?”

I smile and say

“Still drunk”

I laugh and Wanda says

“Do you want me to get you a water?”

Natasha shakes her head and says

“We keep bottles of water in our room. I’ll grab her one.”

Wanda nods and says

“Right well I just wanted to let you know that I just got onto both their asses again and they are on probation for two months”

I furrow my eyebrows and say

“Probation?”

Wanda explains to me that probation is basically they don’t get any missions for two months. And she also added in there that they have to do my mission reports for that length of time too which is amazing since I hate mission reports.

“Wow Wands. That’s so sweet. Thank you”

She shakes her head and says

“No problem. Now I have one more question. They want to come in and apologize to you. Is that okay? I just want to check.”

I think about it and Natasha says

“You don’t have to agree detka. They can sulk in their rooms for now.”

I smile when I get a devious idea.

“What if you guys help me prank them back!”

They raise their eyebrows in concern and say

“What kind of prank?”

I think and say

“I can use my makeup skills and pretend I cut myself because of how bad my mind got!”

Their eyes widen and they say

“Woah there. That’s a little much.”

“Yeah Wanda’s right. Maybe a less intense prank?”

I sigh and nod my head. And then I completely forget about my idea when I say

“Wanda! You can use your powers to temporarily distort my face and body and we can prank them by saying I’m having an allergic reaction to the alcohol! Make them regret it even more!”

Wanda smiles and says

“I think that’s a good idea, but you’ve already had the alcohol in your system for a while. I think allergic reactions happen faster”

Natasha says

“They’re stupid. We can say it was a late onset reaction”

I nod my head aggressively. A little too aggressive though so I say

“Woah. Too much head shake there”

Natasha stabilizes me as Wanda says

“Alright. Why don’t you sit on the ground and I’ll work my magic?”

I sit down a little slowly so that I don’t get woozy or anything and while I’m waiting, Natasha gets me a water to help me sober up.

Wanda then distorts my face to look all red and blotchy and I get fake hives everywhere. I smile and say

“Nat. When were pranking them we can go in my bedside table and grab my old inhaler. I can use it to puff and it won’t do anything, and say I’m out!”

She nods her head. Anything to make me feel better.

And Wanda steps out and says

“I’ll be back with the boys.”

I giggle at my devious plan and Natasha says

“You’re gonna have to stop giggling if you want them to believe it”

I nod my head and get in serious mode. I lie myself in Natasha’s lap as she sits on her knees to pretend like she’s cradling me.

We here Wanda walking back and saying

“You better apologize and mean it”

They reply with a few “yes ma’am’s” and Natasha decided now is a good time.

“Wanda!”

She all but yells.

Thank goodness the party is still going so nobody else can hear.

Wanda runs in with Pietro and Sam hot on her tail and they see me.

Natasha puts on a facade that she’s freaking out and I make my breathing labored as if my lungs are closing up.

“Wanda! Help me out here! Y/n’s having an allergic reaction to the alcohol! I need her inhaler!”

Wanda jumps into action and says

“Where is it?!”

“In her bedside table”

Wanda runs to get it and only now can I see the boys. Their faces are ghostlike when they realize what they’ve done.

I fake puff the inhaler and shake my head. Natasha checks it and says

“Fuck.”

Pietro and Sam are now freaking out and saying

“Wait she can’t have an allergic reaction it’s been like forever!”

Natasha responds with

“It’s late onset and now her inhaler is empty! None of this would have happened if you didn’t spike her drinks!”

I gasp and say

“Epi… pen”

And Natasha remembers I have an epipen for if I get stung by a bee. And there’s a trainer in the bag so she grabs the trainer and they freak out.

She uses the trainer which does nothing but make a click sound and then she sighs as Wanda makes the reaction fade slightly.

They all sigh in relief and Sam and Pietro are the first to say something

“Y/n we’re so sorry. We had no idea this would happen!”

“Yeah we wouldn’t have done it if we knew!”

Natasha looks up and says

“But you would have done it even though you knew about her father?”

Their faces once again go like ghosts and I start laughing at them.

They’re confused and Wanda starts to giggle.

I hop up and say

“You idiots! We pranked you back!”

They stand there confused. Sam is the first to say

“But- but you used an epipen”

I shake my head and say

“That’s the trainer. It helps people know what to do in a real situation. The trainer doesn’t have a needle or medication in it”

He sighs and says

“What about your inhaler?”

I shrug and say

“Empty one. Doesn’t do anything anymore.”

Pietro is just silent and I say

“Aww Piet. Are you sad that I just pranked you?”

He shakes out of it and starts apologizing.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Please forgive me. I know you didn’t have a reaction but I’m sorry because I didn’t think about why you don’t drink. I knew why but I ignored it.”

I sigh and say.

“I forgive you Piet. Just remember that we don’t do pranks that cause harm to someone.”

He nods and I turn to Sam

“And I forgive you too. Now both of you. I’d like to inform you that I have been letting my mission reports back up and I’m glad to tell you that you have until the end of the week to finish five of them”

They groan and say

“Yes ma’am”

I smile and they leave. I turn to Wanda and say

“Thanks fairy wand. You made me feel a lot better”

And I turn to Natasha and say

“Thank you too”

Wanda leaves and we get into bed (not without me putting up a fight) and Natasha makes me finish the bottle before I fall asleep.

“Thank you natty. You’re so good to me”

She smiles and says

“You’re a little devil when you’re drunk you know that?”

I smile and say

“Eh. I’ll be fine tomorrow”

She rolls her eyes and we fall asleep in each others eyes with Natasha knowing I’m gonna be worse when I’m hungover.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: I hope y’all liked it! I kind of rushed it because I have a bunch of things lined up and this is just an extra tidbit I started before creating more lol

Taglist

@ilovesnat @ihartnat @marvelnatasha12346 @moistblobfish @justarandomreaderxoxo

[sparklingchim]

ego season; m | jjk

pairing: jungkook x reader

word count: 6.3k

rating: 18+

genre: hockeyplayer!jungkook, richgirlie!oc, brother's best friend, college!au

warnings: jungkook's a lil flirt <3, unprotected sex, shower sex, doggy, fingering, oral (m&f receiving), creampie 🤭, cum play/swallowing, they like almost get caught 🫣, sum head in the locker room, disgusting kisses, CHANYEOL CAMEO!!!, nipple play, spanks, a teeny tiny mark, cursing, dirty talk, praise, spit

summary: pov: you make ur secret fuck buddy jealous.

a/n: hi hi besties enjoy i love u m going sleepies now <3

⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒

You like the illicit.

Which is why you’re in the shower with Jeon Jungkook.

The guy who is your brother’s best friend.

Starting college and being away from your overbearing parents has its perks – the freedom it has given you has swayed you straight into Jungkook’s arms.

Turns out that despite the beginning of your little secret feeling quite mutinous and thrilling, it soon became apparent that maintaining it hidden from your brother Taehyung is substantially ridiculous when you share an apartment with said brother.

It gets even more ridiculous when you consider that they see each other every day because they play for the same hockey team.

You admit, choosing Jungkook as a fuck buddy was an inconvenient choice in which you had not considered the intricate aspects that would make sneaking around hardly possible.

But

The two of you are undeniably compatible in bed.

Luckily, you found out a few months ago at a frat party when you both were completely wasted and out of your minds.

After that night, there was no going back.

Being in college can be overwhelming at first. Lots of choices and opportunities. But it’s a vast contrast from your previous life, and you’ve fully committed to this lifestyle.

All your life you’ve longed to be in charge if your own decisions. Now that you're in college, living in a swanky apartment near campus, you have a little more freedom.

When there are no parents around to keep an eye on you, you can – almost – do whatever you want.

College is fun.

And taking a shower with Jeon Jungkook is fun too.

You giggle when Jungkook snatches your shampoo bottle from you before you can reach for it.

“Lemme do it.” He squeezes a generous amount on his open palm and rubs the fluid between his hands.

“Jungkook,” you scold. “That’s way too much.” You ogle the ample amount of shampoo coating his hands. Your lips drag into a pout as you watch Jungkook’s excessively besmeared palms extend to your hair. But it promptly fades when he begins to massage your scalp.

“But I like how it feels. Gets really foamy and bubbly.” He has a cheeky grin plastered on his face as he watches the solution grow into a rich foam of frothy bubbles on your head.

“Using too much can dry out your hair,” you mumble. Concentrating is a little difficult with Jungkook’s way too experienced fingers working on your scalp. “It can remove the moisture.”

“Oh, really?” His eyebrow twitches for the briefest second, that’s how you know Jungkook is actually listening to you because judging by his expression, he’s trapped in his own thought bubble.

It’s actually something you adore about Jungkook – whenever he is occupied doing something, whatever it is, he’ll put so much care into it and work diligently. Sweet – admirable, actually. It’s a characteristic you want to achieve as well, but you’d have to tweak on your impatience at first.

“Really,” you confirm.

“And I thought you were just saying that because your shampoo is expensive.” He teases you with a bob of his covered finger on your nose.

“That too.”

You reach behind Jungkook to grab your brother’s weird three in one shampoo. You squirt some on your hand and put it back. On your tippy toes you start to shampoo his hair as well.

He has his mouth twisted in a cocky smirk when he says, “The way you opened the door for me earlier seemed a little...” Jungkook cocks his head and ponders for a fitting word.

When he doesn’t come up with one you suggest, “Desperate?”

“Hmm.” Jungkook’s nose scrunches as he’s in thoughts. “I wanted so say rushed, but sure. Desperate will do.”

Your eyes roll in playfulness. “You were dripping with sweat, Jungkook. Didn’t want any of it dirtying my apartment floor,” you reason.

You texted Jungkook a good morning message and good luck on today’s game. He instantly replied with a thank you and told you that he had just finished his morning jog through the campus park. And maybe you offered him to stop by at your place because conveniently you also wanted to take a shower... (You hate morning showers). Taehyung had left a couple minutes prior to visit the gym.

“That’s the only reason?” A challenging twinkle flashes across his eyes.

The tip of your tongue touches your upper lip as you try to hide your smile. “Wouldn’t know why else.”

Jungkook nods. He grabs the shower head and tips your head back by grabbing your cheek. Carefully, he washes the shampoo out of your hair.

Jungkook is cautious not to accidentally splash water on your face and gently runs his fingers through your wet hair to remove the excess shampoo. You taught him well.

When he’s done, he offers you the shower head and it’s your turn.

Standing on your toes while trying to wash the shampoo out of his hair is always a little battle.

Usually, Jungkook comes to meet you by lowering himself, but at the moment his mind wanders elsewhere.

You first feel his hand on the curve of your waist. It’s a soft grasp. A gentle squeeze of your flesh that transiently side-tracks you from your task.

“Jungkook.” You try to pull him out of his little bubbles he’s trapped in. There’s a thickness to your voice, undoubtedly from his wandering hand on your body.

“Mmmh?’ He doesn’t look you in the eyes. Solely fixed on your body as his fingers mould against the supple form of your tit. You’ve always reckoned him to be a tits man, but he denies it and says he loves your ass equally as much. Liar.

“Bend down a little so I can rinse off the shampoo,” you request. His lashes flutter as he averts his eyes to you. A tiny crease appears between his brows like he has actually forgotten where he is and what you two have been doing. “Believe me, you really don’t want remnants of shampoo lingering in your hair.” You cock your head, fruitlessly waiting for a reaction from his head empty and hands full with tits haze.

Suddenly, Jungkook does bend forward. But not in favour of you, but to satisfy his own selfish desire to suck on your boob.

“Oh!” you squeal, pressing the shower head against his back. “Jungkook,” you chide, but your voice turns into a soft whine at the end.

“Hmm?” His hum together with your nub between his lips twists something in your tummy. His tongue begins to swirl around it, and you have to force your eyes to stay open. Jungkook’s inked hand reaches down your lower back. His subtle touches leave a trail of shivers, until his pads brush over the slope of your ass. He squeezes your cheek, firm fingers digging into your skin.

A small gasp escapes your throat.

With a lewd pop he releases your nipple. A lopsided smirk appears on his face, conjuring the little dimple on his cheek.

Jungkook’s dimple. So banal but so endearing. It’s a pretty contribution to the soft contours of Jungkook’s features – except for the sharp outline of his jaw. That adds to his image of the college jock. You like to tease him with that name, and he loathes it, but the sex afterwards is always so good.

You feel his other hand sneak down, grabbing a handful of your ass. He closes the distance between you again, pressing languid kisses along your neck. Begrudgingly, your eyes fall closed.

“Is this what you wanted?” A whisper of his mellow voice coaxes your breath to stutter.

“Yeah.” It’s merely a murmur. The tender nudges against your skin with his mouth unfold spellbound clouds in your mind, looming over your rational thoughts. “But the...” The shampoo you want to remind him, but he starts to suck on your skin and no more comprehensible thoughts form in your head.

You raise the shower head to Jungkook’s hair and wash off the remaining bits of shampoo. You make sure not to let the water run down his face.

“But what?” he asks, planting a soft peck on the flesh below your collar bone where his teeth have just sunk in. You’re not trying to act like a brat – you just care for his hair.

“Nothing,” you utter between pouting lips. “But no marks,” you alert.

“Just a tiny one.” Jungkook kisses the spot again. “No one will see,” he persuades.

Presuming you won’t wear clothes with a deep cleavage. Jungkook just made sure you won’t.

You put the shower head back on its place on the wall beside you. You struggle to secure it in the holder when you feel Jungkook’s hand move from your ass to your tummy.

Usually, you’d coax him into allowing you to put conditioner in his hair, but you can only concentrate on his hand slowly trailing down your belly button. When he cups your pussy, your hands clasp his shoulders.

A tantalising grin pulls the corner of his lips up. “You want this?”

You nod, your teeth capturing your bottom lip.

“Use your big girl words.” Jungkook runs his pad over your folds, eliciting a shudder from you. “Talk to me.”

“Want you,” you plead. Your eyebrows knit the further Jungkook dips his middle finger in. “Been wanting this for so long.”

Jungkook clicks his tongue. “Last night wasn’t enough?”

The mention of last night shoots arousal and need straight to your core. An exchange of innocent text messages led to a phone call containing dirty words and hushed moans.

“No.” You shake your head. “I need you feel you.”

A chuckle bubbles in his throat. “That’s my girl.”

He spreads your wetness with his finger. Your hand wanders down to Jungkook’s tatted arm, squeezing his biceps when he brushes past your clit. His finger dwells there, putting pressure on your swollen bud. Your hips impulsively start to rock, a shaky whimper rolls past your mouth.

“Always so needy.” He draws his hand back. A petulant whine from you echoes in the bathroom.

“Shh,” Jungkook hushes you. Glimmers of tease spark in his eyes. “Bend over for me, love.”

With a puff, you turn around, bend forward and catch yourself on the tiled wall. It’s cold on your palms, but you’ll endure this if it means that Jungkook will make you cum.

He hisses behind you. “So fucking pretty.” A hand travels over your ass to your spine and back. “The prettiest girl,” he rasps. You earn a smack on your cheek, the pain leaving your walls clenching around nothing.

You turn your head, catching him just as he aims a trickle of spit at your pussy. He rubs it over your folds. His inked fingers vanish between your thighs.

“Oh fuck,” you moan as his index finger slowly enters you. He reaches deep, curling his finger to graze your spot. “More.” He’s teasing you, rubbing over your sensitive area in slow strokes.

“What do we say?” he taunts, specks of mock painting his voice.

“Please,” you reply. “I need more, please.” You’re putty in his hands. The desire to be touched bigger than your general wayward behaviour.

“Good girl.” Jungkook adds another finger. It’s just two, but you feel so full. So good.

While his fingers pick up on the speed, you feel Jungkook’s kisses on your ass. He has you rolling your eyes at the way his pads curl against your sweet spot, the knot in the pit of your tummy tightening.

Jungkook bites down on your flesh, drawing a squeal out of you. Your head twists to him again. He’s on his knees, his cheek resting against the curve of your ass as he captivatingly watches his fingers move in and out of you. A faint smirk hangs on his lips.

He meets your half-lidded eyes. His smirk deepens. “Can take a third one?”

You know you can – he knows it too – but you’d rather have his cock inside you.

“I wan’ you.” It’s a sulky request, but Jungkook’s eyes soften.

“You think you’re ready for me?” He pushes his fingers deep, remaining there for a while. Your knees buckle.

“Yes,” you pant. “I’m always ready for you.”

Jungkook hums. Your eyes focus back on the white tiles, expecting Jungkook to move behind you to bury himself inside you. With a pounding heart you wait. A gasp springs from your chest when

Jungkook’s tongue is on your pussy. He retreats his fingers from your quivering hole, using both his palms to spread your cheeks open. His tongue dives between your folds, inciting breathless whimpers from you.

“Taste so good.” Jungkook muffles indistinctly between licks on your wetness.

The sloppy sounds of his tongue lapping on your pussy fill your ears. Your throat constricts, the pleasure sends you spiralling, not permitting you make another noise.

One hand smooths over your back. You arch your back for him and Jungkook voices an approving hum against your core. Tingles sprawl everywhere, eyes falling shut as Jungkook swirls his tongue over your clit. He sucks on your tiny nub, and your thighs shake in response.

His thumb gathers your juice mixed with his spit and begins to circle your other hole.

“Jungkook,” you mewl. Your voice is small, barely having the vigour to drown out the noise of running water and Jungkook’s wicked mouth.

“Mhmm? What is it, princess?” His playful baritone timbre rumbles through your body, sparking the tight knot in your belly. The pad of his thumb continues to sweep over it, jolts of arousal teeter in your veins. He pecks your ass. “Want more?”

“Yes – please,” you answer hurriedly, voice laced with an equal amount of desperation and lust. It’s still early in the morning but Jungkook has you begging for his cock with no effort.

Jungkook straightens up to his full height. He squeezes your waist, his other hand pumping his thick cock. He rubs the glistening precum on his tip over his length. His eyes are glued to your inviting pussy, the urge to fill you to the brim fogs his mind, but he controls himself. He’ll get you used to his size before fucking you silly. The filthy thought of having you cum around his dick lures a restrained groan out of him.

Last night, when he heard your hushed whines and little whispers of his name, Jungkook was thirsting to come over and have his way with you. It had him lusting over you even after the phone call ended.

Jungkook taps his tip against your aching pussy. The wet sounds it elicits makes his front teeth dig into his lower lip. So wet. Just for him.

His head nudges your entrance. You inhale sharply, zealously anticipating the feeling of his cock sheathed deep inside you. Jungkook pushes his cock inside you. A mutual moan reverberates in the bathroom.

“Fuck.” Your eyes are tightly closed.

“It’s just the tip,” Jungkook mutters, fingers trailing up your spine.

“So big,” you babble.

“You can take it.” Jungkook’s hand finds your tit, firmly palming the smooth flesh. “You’re gonna take my cock like the good girl you are, right?”

The pet name makes your heart flutter. “I can take it,” you promise.

Gradually, Jungkook eases his cock inside you. He’s so deep. Your head hangs low. You’re so full.

There’s an inkling of burning pain from Jungkook’s size, but he allows you to adjust to him. His fingers tugging at your nipple steals your attention. A whine flies past your lips at his ministrations on your pebbled nipple.

“You can move,” you tell him once the pain dulls.

A delicate kiss is pressed on your shoulder blade before Jungkook draws back. His hands are firmly anchored in your hips. Jungkook pulls back until only the head of his cock is left between your walls. In a fluid motion, he bottoms out.

“Damn, you feel so fucking amazing,” he grunts, a harshness surrounds his tone. Jungkook loses himself. He finds his rhythm and thrusts inside your pussy with sharp motions.

You’re a mess beneath him. A moan of his name flees your throat. He smacks your ass and the sting rattles through you, tiny sparks fuelling the fire inside you.

“Faster,” you utter between pants. “Faster, Jungkook.” He picks up on his speed, hitting the sweet spot inside you in hastier succession. “Please don’t stop.” You sneak a hand between your legs. You press your index finger to your clit, stroking in swift circles.

Jungkook gathers your hair in one hand, twisting it around his fist. Your head lifts, back arching.

“You’re gonna cum for me?”

You’re barely able to register Jungkook’s question. Your high is inbound, threatening to spill over. “Y-yes.” It’s a broken cry, Jungkook’s rapid lunges of his hips make it practically impossible to talk.

“Please make me cum.”

“You wanna cum so badly, don’t you?” Mock sympathy laces his voice. His makeshift ponytail tugs you back. Your hands are merely touching the wall for support, but Jungkook has a secure hold on you.

You reply with an impatient whine.

“You’ve been such a good girl,” Jungkook muses. His grip on your waist tenses, delivering a particularly hard thrust. You curse at the way his cock kisses the deepest part inside you. “I think you deserve to cum.”

Oh God.

His hand with your hair bundled in his palm pulls you back to him. You reluctantly let your hands slip from the tiled wall.

“I’ve got you,” Jungkook assures. He snakes both his arms around you, keeping you safe. He gently nudges your hand between your thighs. You comply, allowing Jungkook to replace your fingers. “I’m gonna make you cum.” His voice promises into your ear. A shiver crawls up your spine. His possessive ass likes to receive credit for everything.

Jungkook’s middle finger rubs over your clit in circular motions. Your head tips back, completely engulfed in Jungkook’s enchanting touches on your body.

“So close.” Your head falls back against his shoulder. Your sweet moans fill his ear.

“Pretty girl.” Jungkook’s nose nuzzles your cheek. “Cum for me.” His other hand rests against your lower tummy. His palm puts pressure on that spot. Your eyes roll in utter euphoria.

When the taut coil snaps inside you, a fuzzy feeling rushes through your entire body. It makes your body tingle with bliss. The feeling is overwhelming your senses, your eyes can’t stay focused. You moan weakly, legs shaking.

“That’s a good girl,” he praises. His words send warms chills on your skin.

His finger on your clit slows down. Jungkook lets you ride out your high, his thrusts deep and lazy.

When you peek a glance at him, you see him with brows knitted in pleasure. His dark hair is wet, long hair a mess on his head that you can’t wait to comb later. Jungkook’s sturdy body glistens with water and sweat, his shredded chest momentarily steals your attention until your eyes get distracted by the shimmering tattoos adorning his entire right arm, from hand to shoulder.

His colourful tattoos complete the look and add something irresistible to him, ridiculously charming – an impeccable portrayal of a ravishing man you should keep your distance from, but what can you say, your connection is like a magnet pulling you to him. You had kept your distance from him – even back when you two were still in high school and he was a grade above you – but once a taste of what it’s like to be with Jungkook and you became, mutually, addicted.

And as long as your brother doesn’t get a whiff of it – everything's fine.

“Wanna cum inside,” Jungkook breathes. His hand grips your ass tightly. “Can I cum inside?”

You rarely allow him to cum inside, but the way a desperate, whiny pitch accompanied by little puffs and moans colour his voice lets you decide otherwise.

“Yeah,” you whisper. “Cum inside me, fill me up, Jungkook.”

“Oh, fuck.” His fingers sink into your waist. Jungkook fucks you relentlessly. “Gonna fill your pussy.”

With a guttural moan he pounds deep inside you, painting your walls white. Sloppy thrusts follow as he spills everything inside you, breathless noises hanging in the air.

Jungkook’s gingerly pulls his cock out, lightly tapping it against your pussy coated in your mixed juices.

“Bend over.”

Your hands are flat against the wall again, arching your back for Jungkook.

“Shit.” His palms smooth over the expanse of your ass. “Your tiny pussy looks so good filled up with my cum.”

You giggle. You feel his digits gently trace over your folds. He dips his finger in your cum filled hole.

“Up,” he instructs.

When you stand in front of him again, he holds his finger coated with his cum in front of your face.

On instinct, you open your mouth for him.

You close your lips around the pad of his tatted finger. Your tongue swirls around it, the taste of his cum spreading in your mouth.

Jungkook wears a fond smile on his face. He removes his finger when you swallow. “Good girl.”

Suddenly, someone yells your name from outside the bathroom.

You shriek.

“Relax, it’s just me.” Taehyung.

What the hell is he doing here so early?

You take a step back from Jungkook. “What do you want?” you yell.

“I think I left my AirPods here.”

Your eyebrows draw together in annoyance. “You came all the way back for that?”

Taehyung ignores your accusatory tone. “Can I come in? They gotta be here.”

You send a worried glance at Jungkook. But he just nods, giving your waist a reassuring squeeze.

The shower curtain is opaque. If Jungkook stays silent he won’t notice anything.

Jungkook pushes the shower curtain aside, pointing at the pile of clothes. Your pyjamas mixed with his jogging attire. Shit.

“Hold on a second,” you tell Taehyung, trying not to sound too panicked.

“I won’t look, _ _ _.” Taehyung’s voice drips in impatience.

“Just wait.”

You hurry to bend down, careful not to slip, and pick up Jungkook’s clothes from the floor. Jungkook hands linger on your hips to keep you safe. As you draw back, he pulls back the shower curtain and covers you both in the tiny shower.

“You can come in now.”

You hear him push down the doorknob. The door creaks a little as Taehyung enters the bathroom.

“It’s like a fucking sauna in here,” Taehyung comments.

The water is steaming hot – your choice, not Jungkook’s.

Your heart runs lapses in your chest. Your hand reaches for Jungkook’s arm, tightly holding onto him.

“Don’t forget that mum and dad are coming over this weekend.”

You mentally groan at his reminder.

Your first semester has just barely started a few months ago, but your parents can’t wait to check up on you.

“I know,” you reply.

“I think they wanna have dinner with Minho and his parents.”

Now you can’t suppress your piqued groan. Your forehead hits Jungkook’s biceps.

Taehyung chuckles. “You’re gonna pretend to be sick?”

“Mum will know.”

“Is me breaking his nose for you better?” You hear the smile on his face, but if you said yes, he’d totally do it.

You laugh. “Leave him alone. I don’t even know who he is.”

“Found them!” Taehyung calls. “Gonna leave now. Love ya!” You hear his steps leading him outside the bathroom. The door shuts close.

Jungkook and you remain silent until you’re sure that Taehyung left the apartment.

You heave a relieved sigh.

“That was close,” you mutter against his skin. Jungkook doesn’t say anything.

“So who’s Minho?” Jungkook briefly moves his arm to nudge your head.

“Just a guy who studies here as well.” You prop your chin up on his arm, looking up at him. “My parents are friends with his. They want me to meet him.”

Jungkook nods pensively. His palms slide down your back.

“Jungkook,” you warn when you feel him give your ass a squeeze.

“What? Lemme play with you a little more.”

“But it’s time for conditioner.” He grabs your hand mid-air, before you can fetch the conditioner.

He intertwines your fingers. “Just a little more.” Jungkook nuzzles his face in the crook of your neck.

Your eyes flutter close.

Your arms loop around his shoulders. A shaky breath springs from your chest when you feel Jungkook’s fingers between your legs.

“Gonna make you feel good. I promise.”

Jungkook is insatiable and you’re willing to give him every part of you.

The perfect match.

~

Hours later, you sit in class.

The lecture is almost done. You find yourself habitually scribbling doodles on your iPad, next to your notes.

You keep thinking back on the incident this morning and how Jungkook and you could’ve gotten caught. Maybe there shouldn’t be any visits from him at your place anymore – it's way too hazardous.

You don’t want Taehyung to find out. But you also don’t want to lie to him if you continue tackle this matter imprudently.

Your phone vibrates with a new message. You tilt the screen to your view. An immediate smile unfurls as you read Jungkook’s name.

Jungkook

hey

just wanted to make sure that you’re coming to the game later?

You

i am !! i'm excited

Jungkook

i’ll make sure to win for you

You

hihi

Jungkook

watchu up to rn

You

i’m in class

i’m bored

i don’t have friends

and i'm hungry

Jungkook

poor girl

you wanna come a lil earlier to the game?

You

why?

Jungkook

just so I can see you before the game starts

You

you’ll find me in the bleachers

like you always do

Jungkook

my eyes detect the pretty real fast ;)

You

🙄

Jungkook

so you don’t wanna give me luck before the game :(

You

how early are we talking about?

i still have classes

Jungkook

i dont know

enough time to give me sum good luck

You

what kind of giving luck are we talking about

🤨

Jungkook

you know

just

a little good luck kiss

You

good luck kiss?

you're annoying

Jungkook

i miss your lips

You

you’re sure no one will be there?

Jungkook

if you come early enough

You

i’ll come

just briefly

Jungkook

see ya princess

You’re gonna skip class to give Jeon Jungkook head.

The woman you are.

~

Jungkook slips you in the empty locker room without anyone noticing.

You both have mastered the ability to sneak into places unobserved, it seems.

“Just wanna stress that I skipped a class for you.” An accusing tone resonates in your voice as you turn to him, a finger poking his chest.

A bewitching smile swirls on Jungkook’s mouth. “Well, I’m happy that when you do, on a rare occasion, it’s to spend time with me.” He catches your finger easily, wrapping his hand around your wrist smoothly. Jungkook steps closer.

You can’t deny the giddy bubbles in your tummy whenever Jungkook flirts with you. It’s a prompt reaction – almost natural.

“You want your good luck kiss now?” The way he is staring down at you makes you feel a little jittery, but you keep his intense gaze, bashing your eyelashes up at him.

He traces a line with his knuckle along your jawline. “Whatever,” he answers. “Just the time I spend with you will bring me enough luck.”

A frustrated pout adorns your face. “I skipped class for this?”

“You don’t like spending time with me?” Jungkook’s brow quirks, a small playful smile curving his lips.

“No,” you deny vehemently. “I do like it. I just thought we were gonna do a little more than that.”

Jungkook chuckles. “I think you want it even more than me.”

Heat crawls into your cheeks. “So what?” You try to hide your growing shyness. “You were the one begging me to come here.”

“That’s right.” His thumb brushes over your lower lip, just the hint of a touch. “ ’Cause you always make me feel so good, princess.”

Shivers, everywhere. Jungkook leans down. He wants to tease you, you know it, but you stand on your tip toes and close the distance. You catch his mouth in a fierce kiss, fingers going straight into his hair, dishevelling the mess of his curls.

He walks backwards, pulling you along him until his calves hit the locker room bench and he slowly sits down. With his hands gripping your waist, he tugs you onto his lap.

“How much time do we have?” you whisper against his neck when he presses kisses down your throat.

“Don’t worry about it.” His lips move to your earlobe and he sinks his teeth into your soft skin.

“Jungkook.” You wanted to sound solemn, but it falls from you like a moan when his hands squeeze your ass. “I don’t want anyone finding us like this.”

“Then lets hurry.”

You shoot him a wide-eyed glance. “Excuse me?”

Jungkook ignores you and pulls you in for another kiss.

You are used to this, though. Spending your time with Jungkook like this always meant hurried touches and second look glances at the surroundings.

Your hips grind on his lap. Jungkook curses, his forehead falling onto your chest.

“I love this place,” he murmurs, palming your boobs through your tight sweater top. You giggle.

The bulge in his pants is pressing against you. Your hand clasps around it, squeezing a little. Jungkook groans at the feeling of your hand.

“I need you on your knees. Right now,” he commands in a rasp.

With a mischievous smile you sink down to your knees. Your trapped between his thighs. Jungkook quickly gets rid of his pants and briefs, pushing them down to his knees.

Jungkook’s cock lies against his abdomen. It’s pretty and salivating, his veiny length coloured in an angry red.

He strokes his cock, his thumb swiping across his glistening tip. “Open wide for me.” You feel his hand on the base of your neck. You obey nimbly, tilting your head upwards and sticking out your tongue.

Jungkook taps his cock against your tongue. The wet sound it produces sinking straight into your core. When he pushes his dick inside your mouth, you swirl your tongue around him. A string of curses follow the warm feeling of your mouth.

His cock is heavy between your lips. It reminds you of how his sheer size stretches your pussy when he fucks you, his mushroom tip rubbing against your sensitive spot and making you roll your eyes at the intensity. Your nails leave crescent marks in Jungkook’s thighs when you take him deeper.

“Just like that.” His voice gains something sharp and piercing.

You’re breathless when you pull off. You hold his length to your mouth; a dribble of spit runs down from his tip.

Jungkook moans at the sight of you spitting on his cock. He wants to shut his eyes and let your sinful mouth overtake every sensible part of him, but he can’t draw his eyes from you – his cock between your plump lips, your sparkly eyes looking up at him, a little teary because his size is still a little too much for you. Angelic.

Jungkook wants to blow his load right then and there.

Your head bobs up and down, palm stroking the part you can’t reach. The air is filled with wet, slurping sounds alongside Jungkook’s scratchy groans. You lap at the underside of Jungkook’s cock, tongue rolling around his head when you reach it, a kitten lick at his slit to add your teasing.

His dick twitches in your grasp. “Fuck.” He gathers loose strands in his palm. His hand lingers on the back of your head with your hair in a bundle to support you.

He urges you forward and your mouth closes around him again. Jungkook pressures you to take his cock deeper and you take his length further until your nose pokes his crotch. With shimmering eyes, you blink repetitively, his tip hitting the back of your throat.

“God, you look so fucking pretty with my cock stuffed in your mouth.” Jungkook hisses, keeping you down there. You swallow and his cock twitches again, the curse that flees his chest is low and it does something to your pussy.

He pulls you off his cock, just to push you down again. You gag, eyes tightly closed as Jungkook has his way with you.

“Love to hear you gag for me.” A deep crease appears between his eyebrows. “So good at taking my cock. Gonna make me fucking cum.”

Jungkook’s muscular thighs shake beneath your palms. His hips move desirously upwards, full length sheathed in your throat.

“Gonna cum – fuck ‘m gonna cum. You’re gonna swallow like the good girl you are?”

Jungkook’s cum shoots inside you. His hand in your hair goes limp. You suck on his tip, lazily stroking his dick to pump everything out while he’s breathing heavily above you. He hisses when your gentle touches are too much from him, pulling his cock from your mouth.

“Swallowed everything?” His voice is low, a little drowsy from his high. His fingers smooth over your hair to tame the mess he has created.

“Uh-huh.” A smile is on your face. You give his spent cock a peck before you rise.

Jungkook pulls his clothes back on. You walk to your bag discarded on the floor to search for tissues.

“There’s no way we’re losing the game today,” Jungkook says, smirking.

While you somewhat clean your hands you say, “Don’t jinx it.” When you’re done, you grab your phone.

“I’m not. We’re winning this.”

You stand in front of him. “Can you hold this?” You hand him your phone with the camera app opened, the screen showing you. Your fingers fold around his wrist to get the perfect angle of your face and you start fixing the mess of mascara Jungkook was the cause of.

“You don’t believe in me?”

“No, I do.” Impishness sways in your tone.

Jungkook clicks his tongue. “Princess, you should know me better than that.” He cocks his head, eyes intently watching you. “If we win, I’ll have my way with you tonight. If we don’t, you’re in charge.”

A tiny giggle escapes you at his proposal.

“Sure.”

You’re in for a ride.

~

Watching a hockey game of your brother has always been fun.

Not particularly because you are a fan of the game, but because you like to see Taehyung beam in his love and passion for it. You’ve always been a big supporter of his.

What made the games a tiny speck more enjoyable for you was his hot best friend playing with him.

You can’t keep your eyes off Jungkook. You keep searching for him, observing every move and play.

Sometimes you have to force yourself to pry your eyes away and see what your brother is doing.

It’s hard to force your attention away from Jungkook, but it’s even tougher to feign nonchalance because you attended the game with Chanyeol – a friend from class, but you two initially became friends at a frat party.

He usually tags along with you, together with your friend Naeun but she couldn’t accompany you today – too swamped with work.

“Taehyung’s really amazing.”

Chanyeol’s voice pulls you from your thoughts. Your eyes fly from Jungkook to Taehyung, your throat constricts like you’ve been caught in a criminal act.

“I know,” you say, a little awkward. “He’s always been this good.”

It’s half-time. The fifteen-minute break has just started. The bleachers are crowded, though some are leaving to use the small break.

Suddenly, the huge screens show close ups of the viewers.

The kiss cam.

The couple shown on the screen starts kissing and the entire audience cheers.

You’ve never been on the kiss cam. There are too many people in the audience anyway, the chances to appear on it are low.

Unbothered, you turn to Chanyeol.

“You’re coming to the party this Saturday?” he asks.

“My parents are coming over this weekend.” You sigh at the thought of it. “I doubt I’ll be able to go out.”

“Yikes.”

Your phone vibrates. You unlock it to find a new message from Naeun. You’re occupied with texting Naeun when Chanyeol faintly nudges his knees to yours.

“I’m sorry, I-” When you look up, you see yourself on the big screen. “Oh!” you squeal surprised.

Chanyeol laughs beside you. A rush of excitement and nervousness courses through your system.

Chanyeol’s eyebrows raise in question.

Should you? Chanyeol doesn’t have a girlfriend, you don’t have a boyfriend. There’s nothing to lose, really. Exhilaration is clouding your judgement.

Slowly, a timid smile curves your lips upwards.

You lean in closer. Chanyeol takes the hint and cups your cheek. When his lips touches yours, your tummy tingles. You share a heated kiss, your body leaning in closer as you get lost in it for a brief second.

The applaud and cheers are blocked by your ears. You only focus is Chanyeol.

The moment doesn’t last long. When you both break the kiss, you smile at each other, giggles surrounding you.

The kiss cam isn’t focused on you anymore, another couple on the screen.

“You’re a good kisser,” Chanyeol compliments teasingly.

“That was fun,” you reply, the thrill of it all making you feel light in the head.

When you cast your glance to the field, it slowly subsides.

Taehyung is looking at you with a sharp look. You know your brother too well. His expression translates to are you fucking serious?

Yes, you want to answer. Lemme have fun for once.

Your eyes roll unintendedly when you avert your gaze from Taehyung. But somehow, they instantly land on Jungkook.

Your chest flutters, even from a distance his effect on you is intense.

The look he gives you is blistering, straight into your soul.

No matter how this is will end, Jungkook is gonna have his way with you either way.

Oh, now you are definitely in for a ride.

⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒

read pt 2 here <3

[jasperhaleobsessed]

Hey, I feel kinda weird asking for another fic since I already asked, but can you please do Jasper Hale x reader where reader is the “backup friend.” Where basically her friends only hang out with her, talk to her, etc when there is no one else to talk to. Reader’s mom (who she’s really close to) starts getting really busy with the reader’s younger siblings and so reader gets less attention/gets ignored. The only time reader gets attention from anyone is either when they need her or no one else is available. Reader is hanging out with the Cullens’ and gets a call from her mom telling her to watch her younger sibling even though reader is out with friends and reader’s other younger sibling is home and free to watch the toddler. She just accepts it, but Jasper gets kinda upset that she just accepted it since he could feel her disappointment and she bursts out crying. Jasper lets her know that she doesn’t deserve to be treated that way and maybe cuddles and forehead kisses ensue?

Your only human

Jasper Hale x Female reader

Summary: The reader is having a hard time and Jasper comforts her.

Notes: Hope you like it and I know this wasn't exactly what you may have wanted but nevertheless still hope you enjoy it! :) Also sorry for taking such a long time!

Warnings: Some angst but a happy ending as usual!

Wordcount: 700

(Edit: I forgot to add a gif oops 😬)

Your POV

Laughter filled the room as always Emmett made a terrible joke. You secretly enjoyed his jokes. Even Roselie cracked a smile which was a shock. Jasper had his arm around your shoulder and he hugged you close. Warmth filled your cheeks and your chest tightened. You smiled happily especially after Esme came out of the kitchen and presented you with a freshly baked warm chocolate cookie. You smiled gratefully. 

Then you lost, “Oh come on!” You murmured and jokingly gave Carlisle a stink eye. 

“Sorry.” he smiled apologetically. 

“Oh it’s alright.” You smiled warmly. 

“Yes!” Emmett exclaimed. You turned your head in his direction and looked at him confused. 

“Hand it over Alice!” He held out his hand. Alice gave him the puppy dog face but handed the money out anyway.

 “You bet on me?” 

“Yup!” Emmett said enthusiastically.

“How did you win against Alice doesn’t she see the future and all?” Emmett shrugged his shoulders and Alice answered with, “I guess it was a last minute decision.” Roselie rolled her eyes at Emmetts antics. 

“Okay.” You said slowly. You turned back to the game and watched as the rest of the Cullen’s played against each other. 

“Can you believe them?” You laughed. 

“Surprisingly I can.” Jasper laughed as he interlocked his hand into yours. 

Edward won and Alice was close to winning too. It had been a fun night and you enjoyed every bit of it. You enjoyed being wrapped up in Jasper’s arms and you enjoyed laughing and giggling with the Cullen family that was until your mom called. 

Your phone buzzed, you pulled it out of your back pocket and you read the following text: Hi honey I need you to watch your little sibling tonight! 

Your brows furrowed and you responded with: 

You

But I can’t I’m at the Cullen’s right now 

Your mom

Well I’m sorry but your gonna have to 

You 

Why can’t my other capable older sibling do it??

Your mom 

Because they are busy. 

You 

But I’m busy too!

Your mom

You're the eldest, it's part of your job!

…

You sighed and rubbed your temples as you powered off your phone. You pushed it back into your pocket. 

“What's wrong?”

You turned to look at him and for a moment you had no idea what to do or what to tell him. 

“Uh, my mom needs me to babysit my little sibling.” You said as you went to grab your backpack and get your stuff ready to go. 

“Don’t you have another sibling who's old enough to take care of your younger one?” Jasper asked. 

“Yeah but apparently they can't and I’m the only one who can.” Jasper put his hand on your shoulder and rubbed it soothingly.

“You're working yourself too much, I can feel it.” He caressed your face. 

“I know but no one else can and I have to. I don’t want to but she's relying on me and I can’t go and say no even if I feel exhausted and overworked because she's always working and has no time for her kids anymore. I can't just say no because she needs help and has no time because she’s trying to support her. But as much as I love my siblings I can’t do this. I'm not good at juggling all of this.” You felt your breath hitch and tears sting your eyes. You collapsed in his arms. He listened calmly to your rant.

And rubbed your hair soothingly. “Shhh it’s okay darlin’.” Your body trembled as he sent calming waves to you.

You couldn’t help but hug him tighter. “I’m sorry.” You murmured. 

He pulled you away and cupped your face, “You have no reason to be sorry. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed and exhausted, that's normal. Your only human darlin’.” You gave him a small smile and your tears continued to pour down your face as he whipped them away. 

He calmed you again and you took a deep breath just as he did. “Feel better?” You smiled and hugged him tightly. 

“Would you like me to come with you and help you so you don’t feel as overwhelmed?” 

“Yes!” You felt relieved. 

You turned to the rest of the Cullens and said, “Sorry for crying on ya.” Esme looked at you sympathetically, "Don’t worry dear you're completely fine.” She got up from the sofa and hugged you. Alice jumped up from her seat and you and Esme turned to her. 

“Don’t ever apologize! It’s okay!” She smiled warmly. You always thought her smiles were contagious. She smiled back at her warmly. The other Cullen’s agreed. Jasper took your hand as he led you to your house and you both smiled as you headed there. 

The End. 

[ethosiab]

tfw youre a pirate and made a stupid decision that cost you your soul. and now youre stuck with this other shmuck

AKA boat boys pirate au designs lets gooo

just some thoughts on their designs:

Joel i stuck pretty close to his actual skin but added a bunch of scars because i felt like he'd be the type to get a bunch of scars and proudly show em off

etho i was struggling with slightly because i never really make new designs for him haha

im happy with the finished product though! and the peg leg is because of that one comment he made in last life about dreaming he was a pirate with a spyglass and a peg leg. i started watching his pov recently and only after i made this design did i see that bit lmao

etho's eye(patch) is very important. as is that amulet hanging off of joel's belt

i changed etho's headband in for a bandana because i thought it looked more pirate-y

also im a sucker for vests man

eyepatch etho is very real and i love it

i wanna make joel look much more animalistic with features such as claws, sharp canines, weird eyes and such, but i didn't focus on those here because i wanted their colours + outfits down pat first

i will probably change the belts/buckles up but i think it's funny that theyre matching tbh. destined to be soulmates.

[and-claudia]

Against All Odds pt. 12 (Joel Miller x fem! reader)

General Warnings for later on: The main story will have an age gap between Joel and the reader (Reader will be 25 once we get to the main storyline), this will also be your warning that it will eventually be an x pregnant reader (if that’s not your jam, I’m sorry) there is also going to be more graphic/trigger parts later on so please always to be sure to read the warnings BEFORE reading. This story will also be 18+ and TO BE ON THE TAGLIST YOU CAN NOT BE AN AGELESS BLOG (i do actually check that) also there first hand full of parts are all prologue so Joel won’t actually be in it for a bit

warnings for this part: mentions of suicide, mentions of coming out (it's not all super heavy, I promise!!)

ALSO!!! I am making a decision that kinda contradicts an earlier part... I am adding this note so you know, earlier I was going off Joel's age based off the show, I am now changing it to be his age in the game just to make a few things work a little better... SORRY FOR ANY CONFUSION!!!!!!!

word count: 2800+

Taglist Sign-Up (read my rules carefully before filling it out)

gif not mine

Ellie’s PoV 

Once I was sure Yn was out of earshot, I turned to Joel. 

“I want to talk about what happens after we find your brother in Wyoming.” I said seriously. 

He gave me a weird look, “Okay…” 

I took a deep breath before starting, “What’s your plan for me once we get there?” 

“Well… Marleen didn’t exactly give us the address of where you were going. So I was gonna ask Tommy if he knew where those Fireflies might be. Get you there… then… I don’t know. Timeline really depends on how long we’re out here, how close Yn is to havin’ the baby.” He explained. 

I nodded and was quiet for a moment. 

“What if I don’t want to go to Fireflies…” I asked quietly. 

“Do you not want to?” Joel asked. 

I took a deep breath, “I don’t know…I didn’t want to tell Yn because I don’t want it to stress her out in any way since she’s already pregnant… but I don’t think I want to find the Fireflies anymore…” I watched him to gauge his reaction, but he gave none, “It’s just… I’ve been told I am special, that I am the key to the cure… but I don’t think I am… not anymore. I tried to save Sam… it didn’t work. If I can’t save one person, how am I expected to save thousands?” 

I paused. 

“And I know this sounds selfish, and I know I am not anything really to either of you, but I don’t want to leave you two behind… you three behind. I want to be here when Yn has the baby and watch it grow into a tiny person.” 

I looked at him, trying to fight the tears brimming in my eyes. All I could do was give a small nod. 

“That’s not selfish, Ellie. It’s human.” Joel said after a moment, “Yn and I won’t make you do anything you don’t want to. And you don’t have to decide anything right now. Trust me, we will have plenty of time before now and Wyoming for you to think and make up your mind.” 

I nodded before whispering, “Thank you, Joel. For everything.” 

He only nodded back, “Go get some rest. I’ll nudge you in a couple of hours to take a watch shift.” he said, nodding off to where Yn had fallen asleep against a tree. 

I nodded and stood up. My mind was still reeling with what the hell I wanted to do. But Joel was right, nothing needed to be decided tonight. We were still far away from Wyoming, I would have plenty of time to decide by then… right? 

Yn’s PoV

The following days were fairly uneventful. We walked for hours on end and would rest at night. The sun was setting on our fifth day of straight walking. To say that my feet hurt would be a severe understatement. Joel had said something to me the other day about how I should start showing here soon since I was around 15 weeks now, but currently, the only getting bigger were my feet. I tried not to say anything, though, because I knew their feet must be getting sore, too. But every step we took sent a jolt of pain up my leg. 

“Shouldn’t we stop soon?” I asked. 

“Eh, the sun’s just now starting to set. We can probably go another hour.” Joel said.

He was a few paces ahead of me when he said it, so he couldn’t see the sour face I made… but Ellie did. 

“You okay?” She asked quietly. 

“Hm? Yeah, fine.” I said. 

She nodded before speeding up to be in step with Joel. 

“Damn it, Ellie.” I mumbled to myself as I watched her talk to Joel. 

They both stopped walking, which allowed me to catch up with them. 

“On second thought, let's just stop for the night. This is a decent clearing. There’s a creek nearby to get some water from. We can stay here for the night.” He said. 

“Joel, I’m fine. Let’s go another hour, then stop. It’ll let us get another mile or so under our belt.” I said. 

He said nothing but glanced down to where I had undone my boots earlier. They were completely undone to where they would come off, but they were clearly loosened. 

“Why’re your boots undone?” He asked, standing with his hands on his hips. 

“Forgot to relace them… pregnancy brain. Let’s go. We’re losing daylight.” I said. 

“Nope, sit.” He nodded to a large rock beside a tree. 

I sighed and did as he said. He followed me over and squatted down in front of me. Once I was sitting, he began undoing my boots. I winced slightly as he pulled the first one off. 

“M’sorry.” He said, grabbing the second one and sliding it off gently. 

“How long have they been like this?” He asked. 

“Started about halfway through the day yesterday. I didn’t want to say anything and slow us down.” I explained. 

“You need to speak up when you’re in pain. We’re not traveling tomorrow. We’ll take a day to rest.” He said. 

“No, I don’t want to slow us down.” I tried to argue. 

“Not resting will slow us down even more. Tomorrow, I want you on your feet as little as possible, okay?” He said. 

I nodded, “Can you go fill my water for me?” I asked, leaning over to grab it out of my pack that I had dropped beside me. 

“Yeah. Ellie, give me your water, I’ll go fill them. When I get back, I’ll set a trap to try and get us some dinner.” Joel said, standing up and walking over to her. 

Once he was gone, Ellie came over and sat down beside me on the ground. 

“You didn’t have to say anything to Joel, you know.” I said. 

I wasn’t actually mad at her in any way; I was more just frustrated with myself for being the reason why we were taking a break. Deep down, I knew it was out of my control, but it still didn’t help make me feel any better about it. 

“I know. But I also know you weren’t going to. Plus, I could tell you were in pain.” She said. 

“Thank you… sorry that I’m slowing us down.” I said. 

“Eh, it’s not your fault, it’s the rugrat’s.” She said, making me smile. 

“I guess you’re right. I just want to make sure we can get you to the Fireflies as soon as possible. I don’t know if they’re on a timeline or something.” I explained.

I noticed that she stiffened up slightly at the mention of the Fireflies. 

She let out a nervous laugh, “About that… I talked to Joel a few nights ago… I am having second thoughts on finding them.” She said, looking at me clearly trying to watch for my reaction. 

“Okay… any particular reason why?” I asked. 

“I am not certain that I am the cure… I just don’t know if it’s worth leaving you and Joel… and the baby for something that’s not a guarantee. And I know I at least want to stay with you until the baby gets here… but then thinking about leaving after that doesn’t feel right either. I just don’t know what to do. I told Joel that part of me feels guilty for even considering staying because I could be potentially saving thousands… but I may not even be the cure.” 

“That’s a decision only you can make, Ellie. But it doesn’t have to be soon. We’ll have plenty of time before we even get to Wyoming. Only you know what is best for you… I will say that I would love to have you here when I have the baby. I want them to meet you for sure. But if and when the time comes that you decide to go find the Fireflies, I won’t hold you back. I’ll support you in any decision you make. Come here.” I said, scooting over to make room for her on the rock. 

She got up and sat beside me. I hugged her to my side. 

“Thank you.” She said. 

I only nodded. 

“You know, you’re pretty good at the whole mom thing.” She said suddenly, making me look at her. 

“What?” 

“I don’t know… you just have something that makes me feel like I can share anything with you… like I don’t have to hide anything.” She explained. 

“Well, I’m glad. And you really can tell me anything.” I said.

“Okay, well… do you remember how y’all mentioned a boyfriend when asking if anyone would come looking for me?” 

“Yeah.” I nodded for her to continue. 

“Well, truth is, I’ve never had a boyfriend… and I honestly don’t see myself ever having a boyfriend. If you know what I mean…” She said, glancing over at me. 

“I get what you mean.” I said, smiling and nodding. 

“You’re okay with that?” She asked, almost shocked. 

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be? You’re not the first gay person I’ve met.” I said with a small laugh. 

She nodded as she let out a breath, “Do you think Joel will be okay with it?” She asked. 

“Oh yeah.” 

“Really, even at his age?” She asked, making us both laugh. 

“What’s so funny?” Joel asked as he walked back up with our water canteens filled. 

“Nothing.” Ellie said. 

“Okay…” He said, clearly not convinced, “I am going to go try and trap something for dinner.” 

He collected some supplies before heading off once again. 

“So… if there wasn’t a boyfriend, has there ever been a girlfriend? Sorry if that’s too personal, just curious about your life before all of this.” 

She hesitated, and I was scared that I had crossed the line. But then she began to speak. 

“I don’t know if I would call her a girlfriend… but there was a girl I liked… Riley.” 

The way she said told me everything I needed to know at that moment. Riley was dead, and she clearly wasn’t over it yet. 

“Hey, it’s okay,” I shook my head, “You don’t have to talk about if you’re not ready. I get it. I lost the last of my brothers years ago, and I still don’t like talking about it. It’s okay.” I said, hugging her close once again. 

“I miss her… does that ever go away?” She asked. 

I shook my head sadly, “No… it gets easier. Eventually, you get to where you don’t even think about it anymore until something reminds you of them, then hurts again, not as bad as it originally did, but still hurts. Then again, you eventually stop thinking about it until you get reminded again. It hurts, but it's even less than last time. And it continues. It always hurts just a little bit.” I explained the best I could. 

She nodded. 

“Whatever happened though, it wasn’t your fault… and neither was Sam.” She snapped her head to look at me, “I don’t know what happened with you and him, but Joel mentioned you tried to save him, and it didn’t work… that’s not your fault. I know it’s hard, but don’t blame yourself. And trust me, I know that’s easier said than done. Hell, it’s been over ten years, and I still blame myself for my brother’s death…” 

“What happened?” She asked. 

“He hung himself… I am the one who found him. He had just done it. I tried to cut him down. I just wasn’t fast enough… My father blamed me for it until the day he died… and I still carry that with me. Like I said, the pain never fully goes away…” 

“How old were you?” She asked. 

“Doesn’t matter… no one should have to experience that… I was younger than you were.” I said, staring off. 

“Sorry, I shouldn’t pry.” She said. 

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll share more about my brothers later if you want. Some of the better memories.” I offered, and she smiled. 

“I’d like that. I’ve always wondered what it’d be like to have siblings, even just one.” She said. 

I couldn’t help but think about how if she chose to stay, then she would definitely be getting one. Although I wasn’t much older than her, just around ten years, I could see her becoming like a daughter to me. And I had a feeling the same was happening to Joel. 

small time jump

Within the next three days, we finally found ourselves entering Nebraska. We hadn’t gotten the chance to clean up in a while because the creekbeds were too low, so when Joel informed us of a creek that was deep enough to rinse off in, I was overjoyed. 

“You two go ahead and go. I’ll try to trap a rabbit or something.” Ellie said, nodding us off towards the creek. 

Joel had recently shown her how to trap things, and she actually gotten pretty good in the couple of days she’s been practicing. 

As we walked, I turned to Joel, “As much as I love you, I have only one thing on my mind, and that is to scrub the grime off of me and go sit down and get off my feet.” I said, making my intentions clear. 

“Got it. Give me your clothes, and I’ll rinse them with mine.” He said as we got to the creek. 

I nodded as I slipped my boots off and then peeled my socks off of my feet. The ground beneath me was cool to the touch and felt like heaven against my swollen feet. I finished getting undressed, tossing my clothes over to Joel, and soon I was in the cool water. 

As great as it felt, I was soon getting out and getting my “clean” clothes from Joel. Once again, I was forgoing putting my bra back on for the night and was just about to pull my shirt over my head when Joel stopped me. 

“Hey, wait, turn back around.” He called out to me. 

I turned to face him, “What?” I asked, confused. 

“Just turn to the side again…” He said, staring at me intently. 

“What?” 

“Just do it, please.” He wasn’t being pushy. Instead, he seemed oddly curious. 

I did it and looked at him expectantly. 

“When did that show up?” He asked, in slight awe. 

“What?” I asked, confused. 

“That.” He emphasized, nodding to my stomach. 

“Joel, it’s nothing. I’m just a little bloated. I don’t think it’s what you think it is.” I said. 

“I don’t think so… no offense, but we haven’t really eaten anything that would be making you bloated. I think you’re starting to show.” 

I honestly hadn’t really considered that as a possibility. My mind just jumped to it being bloated. 

“Really?” I asked, looking down, it was just barely there, but there was definitely a small bump forming. 

“I mean, I’m no doctor, but that’s what it looks like to me. Here, come sit while I rinse off, and we can talk about it more afterward, okay? I’ll be quick.” He promised, standing up and beginning to undress. 

Once he was done, he rinsed our old clothes, and we began walking back to our camp. Ellie had managed to catch two squirrels that Joel quickly prepared and began cooking. Then he came and sat by me. 

“Sorry if I made you self-conscious or anything… I just wasn’t really prepared for this part of all of it.” He explained. 

“Were you not…” I trailed off, knowing that his daughter was a touchy subject for him. 

He shook his head, “No, her mom and I were like an on-again-off-again type of thing. Then, at some point, we were off again for a while, and then she showed up at my door out of nowhere with a baby. She was gone the next morning. So, I am a little inexperienced in this part of things… I do vaguely remember my mom being pregnant with Tommy, but that’s about it.” He said with a small laugh, trying to lighten the mood from when he started talking. 

“Well, you got more than I do. I was the youngest, so…” I said, and he nodded. 

“Also, you really remember your mom being pregnant with Tommy… that was so long ago…” I teased. 

“I am only 52. I’m not that old, you know.” He shot back, nudging me with his shoulder. 

“I know, I just like giving you shit.” I said, looking over at him with a smile. 

“You’re lucky I love you. You know that, right?” He said. 

“Yeah, I know. I love you too.” I said, leaning over to kiss him. 

��You better not be letting those squirrels burn.” Ellie’s voice made me jump slightly. 

“They’re not.” Joel said, rolling his eyes, though he wasn’t really upset. 

He finished cooking them before dividing up the small amount of meat from them to all of us. After we ate, we settled in for the night. We had one more day of traveling before we would rest for a day. It was slow progress, but it would work. I knew the cold would set in soon, and the cool breeze that blew through the trees just as the thought crossed my mind only confirmed that. 

taglist:

@sexyvixen7

@joelmillerslays

@elliaze

@little-lovely-darling

@swimmjacket

@watercolorskyy

@mserynlarsen

@sebby-staan

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@fan-g0rl

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@vodkawriter

@angel4astraea

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@kittenlittle24

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@shotgun-shelby

@joeldjarin

@catsareawesomek @harriedandharassed @keileighr @summerchicken @letsdisneythings @mrsyixingunicorn10 @theoraekenslover @xmistress-bunny @cherrycosmos392 @yasmin123123

[morurui]

CHAOS THEORY SPOILER REVIEW

Cause I just finished it and I have thoughts!

Sooooo I honestly have mixed feelings about Chaos Theory if I’m going to be honest I feel like there are some things that worked in my opinion and some things that didn’t really work for me so I’ll be separating this review into three parts: Things I liked, Things I wasn’t a fan of, and General thoughts.

Things I liked:

-The animation was absolutely gorgeous, it was such a step up from Camp Cretaceous that it’s weird to think that they’re apart of the same series. The team behind it did an absolutely amazing job!

-The last two episodes. Oh my god were those last two episodes so good, they had me at the edge of my seat as well as episode 10 finally giving us interactions between the entirety of the nublar 5

-YASAMMY. I think yasammy was done so well this season. Their fight was so real, nobody was totally in the wrong, but they both weren’t communicating their feelings to each other well and they resolved it in the end. It was just perfect

-Yasmina Fadoula. She was written so well I loved how they didn’t just completely forget she has PTSD and anxiety and included that in her character arc for this season. I also loved how they used her to address how bad it is to infantilize those with mental disorders. (Yaz and I are anxiety twins 🧘‍♀️)

-Mateo. The GOAT. I am the number one Mateo fan, dont ever forget it. I love that man and I will stand by him, I was stressing for his life during episode 10.

-Microbang villain girl was such a menacing villain at the end and I honestly love her. It’s clear that while she is using the atrociraptors for evil deeds she does clearly care for them. I desperately need to know more about her…

-Kenji and Brooklynn’s new voice actors do such a good job with the characters and while I’ll miss Jenna and Ryan, their new voices were casted very well!

Things I wasn’t a big fan of:

-Now to address the elephant in the room…Darius being in love with Brooklynn. (I’m going to try to look at this through an objective pov, but since I don’t ship dinostar obviously there’ll be a slight bias)(nothing wrong if you do ship Dinostar I’m happy for you, but these are just my feelings) Im not a big fan of this. To me I’ve never really read Darius and Brooklynn as being romantic together and their friendship is something I truly cherished about JWCC. I do see why they probably decided to make the decision to have Darius be in love with Brooklynn, but to me it’s kind of upsetting in a way to have Darius’s extreme grief response not be just because they were best friends. It feels like the writers were saying “Well, he’s not experiencing this grief so hard because she was his best friend, but it’s actually because he loves her!”. We’ve seen loss be something Darius takes extremely hard (His dad’s death and Ben’s death) and so I don’t really see why they made it so he was in love with her to justify his response when it’s in character without it. Idk man…

-Brooklynn being alive….HEAR ME OUT HEAR ME OUT. THIS IS NOT BECAUSE I HATE BROOKLYNN SHES ACTUALLY ONE OF MY FAVORITE CHARACTERS. But idk these fake out deaths are starting getting to wear me down. Even Bumpy had a fake out death 😭. I get why they kept her alive being as she is a beloved character, but I just think it would’ve been better for her to be a character that somewhat haunts the narrative. It adds more onto the mystery, not only that but it allows the nublar five to explore “Hey our friend was hiding things from us and we’ll never truly get answers, but we’re going to find out what lead to her death and put a stop to it”. Which was what the nublar five are on a path to, until Brooklynn inevitably shows back up and explains everything. Also why did they give her the 2017 Katy Perry haircut…

-Kenji and Darius’s dynamic. I loved how they used their dynamic at the beginning of the show with Kenji blaming Darius for Brooklynn’s death, but beyond that moment their dynamic felt off to me. It was not helped by the whole Darius being in love with Brooklynn thing, but it just felt like they toned down their brotherly bond in this show (ironic since this is the first time we see them call themselves brothers)

General thoughts

-Jesus Christ was Kenji this shows punching bag 😭. He literally does not get a break, it just keeps on coming, breaking up with his girlfriend because she’s not invested in their relationship anymore, living in a trailer with a failing rock climbing business, his girlfriend kept secrets from him all while working with his estranged dad behind his back, his dad trying to use him again and then dying saving him, AND his brother was in love with his ex girlfriend. All in the span of ten episodes. If I was him I would have a mental breakdown every single day.

-Do yall think Ben actually has a girlfriend? I’m like at a 70/40 split, because he only talks about her two times and the first time he brings her up she totally sounds fake. “She’s from…Europe” Why did you have to think so much Benjamin? Also he fully just said she’s from the continent of Europe rather than a specific country in Europe. Also also it’s implied he hasn’t had a phone on him for a while so how does a long distance relationship work if he doesn’t have any means to contact her??? And he doesn’t even have a picture of her in his van. That man is hiding something I need to know…

-Ben and Darius had like 30-40 minutes of screen time shared between them, which is weird because like most of the show was marketed with them being the main protags and they barely interact beyond episode 4. (Their dynamic was too strong for people to handle “do you talk to your mother with that mouth” broke the world)

-Bumpy having a baby is something I predicted and I’m happy I was right!

Anyway that’s really it, sorry this was pretty long and excuse any typos or grammatical errors, but these were just some of my thoughts!

[blue-sadie]

Lost In The Woods

Anakin skywalker x Reader

Summary: sometimes his looks can cause you to follow along to his crazy plans

Warning: forest sex

Yn/3rd person pov

It was like being stuck in an endless loop the forest had no being or end, the tall trees disrupting the communications.

the soft sloshing of mud under our feet being the only thing you could hear I was furious how do I always get dragged into his stupid decisions how can I not say no to his stupid......dreamy face wait... what are you thinking he's dreamy his... a... idiot yeah an idiot.

I shook my head trying to get me to stop thinking about him "you ok there yn" aww his voice it made my heart want to melt... get your act together yn "fine" I muttered briefly turning my head to the side looking back at him as he trailed along behind me "anything from obi wan" he asked catching up beside me I rolled my eyes internally "nothing" I growled and gasped as he caught my wrist, pulling me to him "what is your problem" he said as his piercing blue eyes stared down into mine.

The height difference made me want to shrink back and disappear "answer me" he growled bringing his face closer to mine I gulped as my eyes flickered between his eyes and lips is he a good kisser? Does he think of kissing me "i-i" I had no words to speak was I really angry at him or more my self for following him? His presence confuses me "i-i isn't an answer, yes I get it i messed up and got us lost but doesn't mean you can be a bitch to me" my eyes snapped to his as he spoke, he waited for me to speak but when I didn't he just sighed and let me go and carried on walking without another word.

I internally slapped myself and sighed out before following a bit behind him and continued the walk in silence. We walked in till the sun was started to set and found a nice clearing to spend the night and like a unspoken conversation I went to collect the firewood and anakin went to found some fish in the near by river, I gathered the basics and started building the fire and later lit it and sat close by the flickering flames keeping myself warm as I waited for anakin to return. The forest was quiet except for the crackling of flames the shadows started growing closer as the night progressed I was starting to worry.

"Ani" I called out at any sound I heard my breathing started to quicken as I stood up staring into the dark distance "anakin its not funny anymore" I yelled as my legs started to tremble its been almost 2 hours "please come out" my eyes started to glisten as I looked around hopelessly "I'm right here" I jumped turning to him his usual grin plastered on his face but I didn't care and ran to him in embracing him "I was so scared" I whimpered hiding my face in his chest as he chuckled "I'm sorry" he murmured and stroked my hair "I found a imperial base we can raid in the morning for communication I was just scouting it out to make sure it's no threat" he explained and eyed me carefully as I pulled back.

I lazily wiped the small tear the ran down my cheek turning away from him "ok" I murmured and went to sit by the fire I felt awkward and scared I didn't want to make things weird between us we were always friends since he joined the order but over the years a strange tension formed between us "hey I'm ok" he said sitting beside me, I never liked being left alone for to long everyone in the order knew this and master yoda says it's gonna be my down fall it's because when I'm left alone I get lost in my head and over think things and has been some of the cause to our failed missions.

"What's happening in that brain of yours" he asked nudging me softly, I sighed heavily burying my face into my hands "what's not happening in my head" I laughed bitterly "you remember what obi says 'if you let it happen it will happen' he chuckled trying to mimick obi wans voice I glared up at him playfully "we both know sometimes obi wan doesn't know what he's talking about" I giggled remembering the countless times me and anakin proved him wrong "yea but he's old" ani laughed pulling me into his side his chest vibrating with his laughs, was it wrong to want to stay here forever? Just me and him.

"A-anakin" I murmured gazing up at him and admiring as the flames flickered in the mirror of his eyes "yes yn" he said his eyes staring back into mine "i-i wasn't mad at you earlier" I whispered making his brows come together in confusion "I was just f-frustrated with myself" I turned my attention back to the fire "why are you angry with yourself" he asked shifting himself to face me his hand grabbing my own in a comforting manner "I-I was angry at myself for how easy I follow you" I said and trembled as I felt his thumb started to graze over my knuckles as a comforting gesture.

"That's not something to be angry about surely" he tried lighten with the mood, I started to feel blush rise to my cheeks I was being silly "j-just forget about" I said and tried to remove my hand from his but he held tight "I won't forget about it yn" he urged me to continue explaining my behavior and my foolishness started getting into my head you can't tell him he'll just laugh and make fun of you, but he isn't that type of guy right? I stared blankly at the ground as I was stuck in my head, he likes padme he can never like you, I was caught in a daze into I felt his soft lips meet mine.

I stared horrified into his eyes but his were calm and full of care "get out of that brain and talk to me please" he pleaded huskily as he pulled back from my lips "i-i" I blinked trying to process what just happened "y-you kissed me" i was in shock and raised my hand to my lips which were kinda puffy from the kiss he chuckled nervously as he rubbed the back of his head as a slight blush dusted his cheeks "I'm sorry if I step-" he tried to speak but I brought my lips to his again our eyes flattering closed as our lips molded together this was the first time in ages I felt happy and complete and the voices in my head finally stopped.

His tongue slowly pushed into my mouth as his hands guided down my sides to my hips and urged me to move and sit on his lap my heart thumbed with desire as I straddled his lap my hands threaded themselves into his hair as his stayed on my hips "w-wait wait" I panicked an pulled back "what yn" he asked concerned and raised one of his hands to caress my face in worry "what about the rules" I murmured "about padme" my heart broke as I said her name his concern turned into a grin "yn nothing happened or ever will happen between me and padme what made you think that" he chuckled being my face closer to his, I tried turning away but his fingers grasped my chin "were you watching" he murmured I blushed from embarrassment conforming his suspensions making him laugh.

"Your so fucking adorable" he smirked before catching my lips in his once more "ani" I whined as he nibbled on my bottom him, his kiss was starting to get more passionate and rough with each passing second and his hands getting more touchy "god I want to fuck you so bad" he growled out as he moved his lips to my neck sucking harshly out my skin "f-fuck" I whined out squirming in his hold "if you keep moving like that I'm gonna go fucking feral" he hissed into my ear his hands planting my hips down onto his lap to stop me from moving.

"Ani" I moaned as I started to feel my panties dampen, his hands slowly started trailing up my leg and went under the fabric of my clothes, a shiver running up my spine as he stopped at my thigh he pulled back from me and his eyes darkened from lust and hunger he kissed me again as he slowly started pushing me to the ground his big body caging mine to the floor "fuck" he muttered as he ripped off his robes leaving him in nothing but boxers "anakin" I squeaked my heart almost beating out my chest as I looked over his body "like what you see" he teased making the blush come back to my cheeks he laughed at my reaction and started kissing my neck again as his hands started working on getting my clothes off.

My body heating up as I felt his hands touched my skin my hands threaded through his hair forcing his lips into my skin I want him, I need him "ani I need you" I moaned throwing my head back and heard him growl lowly "all you had to do was ask" he roughly ripped off my underwear and his and my mouth gaped at his size he was huge "fuck" I muttered biting my lip "it's all your" he growled moving his body closer to mine his cock teasing my pussy lips "please anakin" I begged and winced as he slowly pushed in the stretch causing me to cry out "fuck so t-tight" he groaned as he fully pushed in and waited for me to adjust.

"Y-you can move" I murmured and before he did he leaned down to my ear "that's a good slut" he growled before thrusting roughly into me "f-fuck ani" I cried out as my fingers dug into the forest floor with each thrust he forced moans out of me, his hands wondered to my breasts playing and pinching the nibbles "aww I can't wait till these are big when your pregnant" he groaned his head tilting back I gasped "what" "do you think I'm gonna pull out slut your mine now and I want everyone to know" he chuckled darkly as he quicken his thrusts.

My heart flattered as he said those things "would you like that everyone knowing that I own you" he muttered I nodded eagerly and started moving my hips back into his making him yell out in pleasure "such a good slut for me" he groaned and used one of his hands to rub my clit "and good sluts get to cum so cum when I get to 1" he murmured his eyes piercing mine "10" he started kissing my breasts leaving hickies along my chest "9" my breathing started to quicken as I felt a knot start to form in my stomach "8" I closed my eyes and my mouth formed an o shape "7" his thrusts started to faulter as his cock started to twice.

"6-6" my moans started getting high pitch as I felt the knot tighten "5...4" my body started to spasm and tense underneath him "3" his groans and growls were louder and his breathing rigid "2" he yelled out "1" I screamed out as I cam my body shaking as he coated my insides with his cum I panted as I tried calming down "thank you" he sighed out pecking my lips and carefully flipped us over so he was on the ground "a-aren't you gonna pull out" I whispered and shivered as I felt a cold breeze on my back "nope" he grinned grabbing his torn robes and covering the both of us I cuddled into his chest and we both sat in silence watching the fire burn

"I love you yn I hope you know that".

Tag.List

@neteyamyawne @sweetirilly

[sunsetsentiments]

okay so i love you i'm sorry by gracie abrams is totally about jason and piper from piper's pov. HERE'S WHY,, it's a long one lol

"I told the truth, oh, but you didn't like it, you went home." // "That's just the way life goes, I like to slam doors closed. Trust me, I know it's always about me."

piper is the one who broke up with jason,, and from the burning maze, we know she saw it as an inevitable event. internally, she has been struggling with figuring out who she is outside the perils of demigod life,, and if she's living the life she wants or the one hera/aphrodite wanted for her. basically, she's dealing with the confusion and exhaustion as a result of all the life-changing events of hoo.

while i have comments about the way rick wrote and explained this break-up (again,, topic for another day),, it's clear that piper needed time away from everything to deal with her turmoil, and it's this that drives her to end things with jason. she needed to search for clarity, and she couldn't with him around when his presence in her life only added to her confusion. so she slammed the door closed and thought that it was for the best, and i can imagine jason responding as maturely as he could while still showing signs of heartbreak. all piper could do was let it happen.

"Thankful you don't send someone to kill me."

piper being absolutely relieved and guilty about the way jason responded to her decision 😭

"Two summers from now, we'll have been talking, but not all that often, we're cool now." // "Wistfully lean out my window and watch the sun set on the lake. I might not feel real, but it's okay."

these lyrics capture the kind of relationship piper and jason had - because romantic drama aside,, piper considers him to be her best friend ("more than annabeth"), and even when they were on shaky terms,, they were still able to communicate and understand each other well as noted by apollo. so yeah,, they'd definitely continue being friends even after a break-up. and it's nice and weird and comforting all at once. because the old piper wouldn't have expected things to happen this way,, but the present piper is glad that they can still be in each other's lives.

if only they had enough time to work things out though. because here comes the tragic part 😭

"You were the best but you were the worst, as sick as it sounds, I loved you first. I was a dick, it is what it is, a habit to kick, the age-old curse."

no bc in my head,, this whole bridge is piper's thought process as she deals with losing jason post-burning maze.

he was the best - literally, not only one of the most powerful and reliable demigods, but also the most supportive boyfriend she could ask for - but also the worst,, bc sometimes she felt like she didn't know him,, sometimes he was distant and too inside his own head,, sometimes she wasn't sure if they were meant to be together or not,, and that uncertainty and doubt nagged at her, and it's exactly why she breaks up with him later. but was it really the right decision, or did she let her insecurities control her? and if the latter was true,, then she broke both of their hearts for nothing,, which ultimately led to their strained relationship, and they would neve have full closure bc of what caligula did.

in piper's head,, she might start to think that she made a mess that didn't have to happen,, and the crazy part is she let it happen even though she was the one who loved him and had feelings for him first,, whether they started as an illusion or not.

so how could she possibly let all this happen? we know piper has struggled with a low self esteem since before, and she might look back to past actions that were rash in retrospect,, like stealing cars to get her father's attention. so piper might mistakenly spiral into thinking that everything is her fault bc she was lacking as a person,, and that bc she didn't beat her age-old habits, they haunted her like a curse.

"I tend to laugh whenever I'm sad, I stare at the crash, it actually works. Making amends, this shit never ends, I'm wrong again, wrong again."

piper tried to accept the break-up and losing jason as best as she could. she tried to play down the emotional weight of the break-up in the burning maze bc she felt as though she thought it through,, and at the end of toa, she's obviously trying to move on. these methods seem to work for her on the outside,, but that doesn't mean the grief and confusion has gone away.

the pain and the memories might keep coming back,, and piper might have to grapple with the possibility that she was wrong this whole time, again leading her to believe it was all her fault. in short,, she's confused and devasted and has no idea what the truth is anymore (which is why a book fleshing out her and leo's grief would be SO good).

"I wanna speak in code, hope that I don't, won't make it about me." // "I love you, I'm sorry."

the last chorus of the song beautifully reflects piper's confusion and longing, wishing that maybe she did things a little differently, wishing that maybe she and jason had a different ending.

but the thing is, in spite of all that happened and the confusion she's facing now,, the one thing that never changed was that she loved him, and it's both because of this and in spite of this that she did what she had done, and why she's feeling all these mixed emotions now.

"i love you, i'm sorry" is so powerful coming from piper considering the first time she told him 'i love you' in mark of athena,, and also bc of the whole i'm sorry part. she's sorry about breaking his heart. sorry if she ever made him doubt himself, if he was good enough, if it was his fault. sorry about never properly reconciling. sorry about not being enough to save him. sorry about being unable to say goodbye. sorry about never seeing him one last time.

[kaladinstormblessed09]

I finished RoW and now I don’t know what to do with myself. Please no spoilers for any of the secret projects and TLM. I haven’t read them yet. Also there’ll be bands of mourning spoilers in the review along with RoW

I loved all of Kaladin’s arc. I suffer from depression as well, so it was so relatable to see a main character in a fantasy series struggling too. And he struggles. This book Kaladin hits the lowest point. Starting from chapter 10 when he gets discharged, I cried on his behalf. I knew it was necessary. He kept freezing in the middle of the battle, but Kal was feeling betrayed by Dalinar even when he knew it was the right decision, and I felt the same. Even though I knew this was the right decision. He needed to be away from the fighting, from the battle. Kaladin’s scenes with Wit during the middle of his nightmare was one of my favorite moments in all stormlight. Wit tells kaladin that he'll be warm again, and I’ll hold Brandon to this. You cannot kill Kal off after you promised him that he'll be okay. Brandon, I’ll come for you. Don’t you dare hurt kal. And then Moash kills Teft. Sigh. This was spoiled for me, so all through the book I kept waiting for this. It was not a good experience. I thought he was going to die when the tower got taken, but then he didn’t. And I just wanted to get it over with, because it gave me so much anxiety knowing what happens but not when. I was almost relieved when Moash (I’m not calling him Vyre, that pretentious asshole) shows up. I knew it was about to happen now. I was mentally ready, but it still hurt so much. I cried the most in Row. Kaladin being catatonic holding Teft’s dead body is an image that will haunt me, and I’ll never forgive Moash. I don’t want a redemption arc for him. And before all Moash apologists come for me, it’s not because he killed Elhokar. I get that. It’s because he tried to manipulate Kaladin into killing himself. He used the things Kaladin told him in confidence and used them to get him to commit suicide. He was going to kill Lirin to use his death to further manipulate Kal, and he killed Teft. I don’t fucking care what deep reasoning you use to explain why he did what he did I don’t forgive him. And death is too easy for him. I want him to live with the pain. I want odium to stop taking away his pain. Even if Kaladin someday forgives him, which I don’t think he should. He killed Teft, I will never forgive him.

Lirin really annoyed me all throughout the book. He told kaladin at one point that he should’ve been a good slave, then maybe all these wouldn’t have happened to him. And just for that fuck Lirin. He’s a pacifist to the point where he maintains the status quo, and these types of people annoy me. If you want to live under the oppression good for you, but don’t begrudge the resistance. In the end he pulls through though. Now be a better father to Kal. Don’t call him a monster, or I’ll come for you Lirin. I’ll learn how to isekai into books and give Kal all the love that he deserves.

We barely got any Dalinar povs, and I’m mostly fine with it. I didn’t want to see the campaign at Emul, it’s just another battle. But I wanted more Jasnah. Jasnah/Wit relationship caught me off guard, because I always head cannoned Jasnah as a lesbian, but now I think she’s asexual? Someone please correct me if I’m wrong. It’s just really weird to see Wit/Hoid in a relationship. In the epilogue, did someone really got one over Hoid? Or was Hoid pretending? I can never tell with him. Also, the leader of the ghostsblood was Kelsier all along! And he named himself Lord of Scars. That’s the stupidest name ever. I love him so much! I have missed him.

I really liked all the fused stuff. Leshwi was one of my faves. I liked her and Kaladin’s on/off enmity. It was a fascinating dynamic. Actually, Brandon did such a good job with the characterization of the fused. Raboniel being my favorite. She was such a good character. She reminded me a bit of a mix of Semirhage/Ishamael from WoT. Her just trying to end this war that just goes on and on for eternity. Her motivations were so understandable. When she killed her daughter to save her from infinite torture I cried so much. The dynamic between her and Navani made me forget about Dalinar. I wanted them to get together and do science.

Navani was such a standout character. I love her, even though a lot of the science stuff went over my head. Her dealing with her imposter syndrome while inventing new fabrials and creating anti-voidlight. Aaaah the whole process was so freaking amazing. It makes me so mad to think about the prologue where Gavilar was such a shit to her. I’m glad he died, and that we get to see him die over and over again. I called it from the moment sibling was introduced that Navani would bond her and it felt so good when that happened!

I’m probably forgetting so much, but I had a blast. I inhaled this book in less than a week, and I kind of want to reread from TWoK again now. Waiting till December is going to be brutal. I’m so excited for Wind and Truth. I think it’ll be Szeth’s book. He’s such an underrated character and now him and Kal are teaming up to go to Shinovar. I can’t wait!

[dwobbitfromtheshire]

Stuck Between a Jock and a Metalhead

Summary: Nancy, on a whim, decides to visit Steve at Scoops Ahoy, which leads to her overhearing confessions from Steve that leads her to think about the decisions she's made. A few days later, she decides to come back. She finds him being hit on by the town freak. What's a girl to do? Oh, get stuck in a freezer with the both of them.

A/N: Oops, this wasn't supposed to be so long. I've been working on it for the last couple of days, trying to get Steve’s family background just right.

Chapter One - Chapter Two - Chapter Three - Chapter Four - Chapter Five - Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Eddie's POV

Eddie sat up in bed with a start and looked at the clock on his bedside table. Oh, fuck he was going to be late. He had spent worrying about how things were going to go that he didn't get very much sleep last night. He had spent that time trying to pick out an outfit, which was stupid because it wasn't like it was a date. The idea of them dating wasn't totally weird though. He knew that three people could date, but the idea that both of them wanted him at the same time. . .it was absurd. Besides, it was clear to see that Steve had eyes for Nancy Wheeler. Not that Eddie could blame him for it, and he certainly couldn't blame Nancy for looking back at him. Eddie tried to get out of bed, but his legs got tangled in the sheets, and he fell out instead.

"I'm fucking cursed," Eddie groaned.

"I keep telling you that you probably pissed off Mother Nature at some point when you were little. Right little terror, you are," Wayne called from the kitchen.

"Ha fucking ha, Uncle Wayne, you're so funny," Eddie growled as he stomped into the kitchen and stole a sip of Wayne's coffee.

"What's got your panties in a bunch, son?" Wayne asked.

"I'm going to hang out with a couple of friends of mine. I woke up late," Eddie said.

"New friends?" Wayne asked.

"Yeah, uh, Steve Harrington and Nancy Wheeler," Eddie replied.

"Harrington? He ain't kin to Otis Harrington, is he?" Wayne asked.

"I think Steve mentioned something about his grandfather's name being Otis," he said. "We're supposed to go through his grandfather's salon today. I volunteered to help him."

"He thinking about reopening it?" Wayne asked.

"I think so. His parents don't really want him to. I met his mom. She's a real. . . bitch," Eddie said.

"Knew his grandfather back when he had the salon open. He was a great man. Did real good on my hair. It was such a shame when he had to close it, and then when he passed," Wayne said. "It's nice that Steve wants to do that and it was real nice that you offered to help."

"Well, it's nothing," Eddie shrugged and pressed an obnoxious kiss to his bald spot. "I'm going to get ready, old man. See you later."

"Boy! I hate it when you do that!"

"No, you don't!"

A moment later, Eddie came out freshly showered wearing his nicest pair of black jean shorts and a new Dio tank top.

"That's a nice shirt. Is it new?" Wayne asked, looking at him knowingly.

"Shut it," Eddie said.

"I was just pointing it out. Your hair is all up in a bun. . .that's nice. Oh, I see you have a fresh coat of black paint on your nails," Wayne said.

"Stop pointing things out! I'm leaving now!" Eddie exclaimed as he slipped on his vest.

"Which one of them are you interested in, son?" Wayne asked with a chortle.

"Leaving!" Eddie exclaimed.

"Don't come back pregnant. It's bad enough I spoil you, I don't need a grand baby to back up those goddamn cow eyes of yours," Wayne laughed affectionately.

Eddie rolled his eyes, huffed, and walked out the door. He popped his head back in a moment later.

"You're lucky I love you, old man," Eddie said and flipped him off.

Eddie cackled as he walked to his van. He loved him even if he could be such an embarrassing dad sometimes, which Eddie wouldn't admit that he loved. Wayne was always there for him, but he picked up a lot of parental moves once his dad officially walked out of his life. He's always been pretty supportive of everything he's done, even if he didn't like it himself, like showing up to his talent show and listening to him play and on his days off he'd sneak into the Hideout to watch him. It wasn't his kind of music, but he loved being there for Eddie. When he came out to his uncle as bisexual, he had been the most supportive he had ever been. He had been relieved that nothing changed between them.

"You're still my boy, Eds," Wayne had put it so simply but somehow managed to say everything that needed to be said.

"Don't come back pregnant. . .asshole," Eddie scowled as he climbed into his van. "He knows that if people say shit, I'm going to picture it in my head."

He waved the image of his swollen body cuddled between Nancy and Steve away with a loud huff, erasing it away like it was a chalkboard. He followed the directions that Steve told him to follow. He pulled up to the salon, which was a few doors down away from Melvald's. To his surprise, Steve and Nancy weren't there yet. He was the first to arrive? Or maybe they waited so long that they went ahead and investigated without him. He got out of the van and went to the door and tried peering inside, but the windows were too dirty to see anything. He vaguely heard the sound of a car pulling up, but he ignored it. He leaned back, his hands on his hips, and frowned. HONK! Eddie screamed and jumped. Someone had laid on their horn, someone really close. He turned around to find Steve sitting in his car, laughing his ass off while Nancy hit him as she struggled not to laugh either. Steve got out, still laughing, and Eddie glared at him.

"That wasn't funny, dick," Eddie said.

"I beg to differ," Steve snickered and pulled a carton out of a paper bag from Scoops Ahoy. "Will your favorite ice cream help you ease the pain?"

"Hmm, strawberry with extra sprinkles? Hmm. . . It will suffice. . .for now," Eddie said as he opened it and started digging into it with the plastic spoon. "Hmm, yummy. What was I annoyed about before?"

He was well into eating and licking his ice cream when he realized that he was being watched with interest. His eyebrows furrowed when he noticed that Steve and Nancy's eyes were following his every little movement with his ice cream. Did they both find him attractive? Eddie couldn't help but blush as his mind went back to that moment in the freezer when Steve kissed him. No, it was a pity kiss, that's all. He was seeing things that he wanted to see.

"Uh, don't you guys have ice creams of your own?" Eddie asked.

"Yes!" Steve and Nancy exclaimed.

Eddie leaned against his van as they enjoyed their ice cream. He could feel Steve’s eyes on him again.

"Those are some nice legs - shorts! Those are some nice shorts!" Steve exclaimed.

"What the fuck are legs shorts?" Eddie asked.

"Nothing!" Steve said quickly.

"Right. . ."

Eddie was hearing things he wanted to hear now, too, because he was pretty sure Steve Harrington just commented on his legs. He watched Nancy lean against Steve and giggle. He had noticed that they seemed a little more carefree than before, a lot less weighed down, but they still held a story behind their eyes. Eddie wasn't too keen on getting in between whatever new was growing between them. He could at least admire their beauty and imagine what could be between the three of them. For now, he was excited for their growing friendship. They finished off their ice cream, and Steve tossed the remains in the nearest trashcan. He fished out his keys and unlocked the door to the salon. They immediately inhaled some dust. It seemed like someone hadn't been here in a few years. Steve propped open the door with a brick to air it out.

"It's not as bad as I thought it was going to be," Eddie admitted as he looked around the place. "If you ever think about reopening, Wayne said he would love to help. Had good things to say about your gramps."

"Yeah, I'm starting to hear about that from other people, too. I mean, I loved my grandpa, but I didn't know that other people loved him too. It's weird because other people really hate my parents, and they've really tarnished the family name," Steve grumbled. "It's all I ever here is how much my father is an asshole."

"I'm not surprised. But I figure that if anyone can untarnish the family name, it'd be you," Eddie said.

"You think so?" He asked.

"Well, if you are able to put up with your unbearable mother, I figured you can do anything, big boy," Eddie said, clapping him on the back.

He watched his cheeks turn pink, and he laughed in amusement. Eddie looked around the room. It was exactly what you would expect a barber shop to look like and then some. With its red checkered floors and comfortable chairs that stood in front of dust covered mirrors. Although it was a lot more home-y than Eddie expected it to be. It felt more like a cross between someone's living room and a barber shop. Rat eaten, moldy couches were tucked up on either side of the room. Magazines with their covers bitten into lay on intricate looking coffee tables. They looked hand-made. What surprised him the most were the wooden varnished animals worked into the walls itself. Tiny wolves, deers, rabbits, and birds were sticking out of carved trees that were also worked into the wall. Plastic leaves had once hung on the trees, but it looked like they had fallen off. It was the coolest thing that Eddie had ever seen.

"Wow," Eddie gazed at in wonder. "This is so fucking metal."

"Yeah, my Grandma, who died before I was born, had a mutal friend with Grandpa, and they both surprised Grandpa Otis with this," Steve said. "My Grandpa didn't talk about him a lot. Whenever I asked about him, he always got really secretive. He talked about him a lot near the end, though. Him and an old war buddy of his, Steven. As well as my Gran, I thought it was sweet whenever he called her his best friend, and he always did even in the end."

"Wait, he had a war buddy named Steven?" Eddie asked.

"Yeah, Grandpa named me after him," Steve replied.

"Your grandpa named you? Not your parents?" Nancy asked.

"Well, my grandpa practically raised me the first few years of my life," Steve said, shrugging like it was no big deal.

"Uh, where were your parents?" Eddie asked.

"In and out like always. It was a busy time for my father's company," Steve said. "He built it from the ground up, you know. I also think there was a scandal at the time. I don't know what it was. My dad wasn't always loaded. Anyway, my grandpa's things are in the apartment above us."

Steve entered through a torn curtain, flipping on lights. There was a thick wooden staircase that led to a small hallway, and turning left, there was a door. Steve unlocked it and turned on the lights. Inside was a modest two bedroom apartment. Eddie could tell that the second bedroom had been added on. A wall had been put up as a way to devide the once one room apartment. Both bedrooms were filled with boxes, and the furniture was covered with sheets.

"It's nice," Nancy said. "Very home-y."

"Unlike my house, you mean?" Steve snorted. "Anyway, this was my bedroom."

"Your bedroom?" Nancy asked.

"When I lived with my grandpa, the first few years of my life. A couple of years later, he started getting sick, and he had to close the store. Then, we had to move into the house. Honestly, I wasn't even sure they were my parents. My Grandpa mainly told stories about when my dad was a kid and my mom wasn't around a lot for him to get to know," Steve shrugged again.

It was taking everything in Eddie not to burst into tears and not hug the stuffing out of this guy. The way he talked about it so casually. . . Like it was the weather and not the fact that his parents abandoned him, then used his life like a revolving door. Eddie breathed in deep and then exhaled, stuffing his hands into his pockets, clenching his fists. He shared a look with Nancy, and she looked just as shocked as he was.

"How come you never told me about any of this stuff before?" Nancy asked.

"I don't know. You never asked," Steve shrugged, his back to her.

Eddie knew it wasn't supposed to be a slap in the face, but judging by the look on Nancy's face, it had been. She looked so guilty. Maybe if Steve hadn't been so casual about it like he was used to people not actually being interested in the real Steve Harrington. He knew his fucking parents were the cause of that. Eddie nudged Nancy gently, letting her know that she wasn't alone in making assumptions about Steve in the past. There were more layers to this guy than they both ever knew, and they were all about to find out more. He didn't know what went on with them, but he hoped it all worked out.

"Hey! My stuff!" Steve exclaimed as he walked into his bedroom, and he looked at the boxes.

"Your stuff?" Eddie asked.

"Yeah, the toys, clothes, and blankets my parents gave away to the church," Steve said.

"Did they at least ask you first?" Eddie asked.

"No!" Steve said as he dug through the box happily. "The teddy bear my Grandma made when she found my mom was pregnant with me. She stitched this together herself. Made it from Dad's old baby clothes. I used to sleep with this thing every night, and then my mom said I was too old to sleep with a stuffed animal. Said I looked stupid. Sir Snuggsalot because he's so snuggly."

Eddie's heart swelled in his chest at the sight of Steve cuddling the bear. It suddenly turned to anger. He pulled Nancy off to the side.

"Okay, we lie in wait for his parents to come home then me and you. . . We kill them," Eddie said. "It needs to look like an accident."

"I have been reading up on poisons," Nancy said.

"Hmm. . .it can't be quick. They don't deserve a quick death," Eddie said.

"Hmm. Agreed. Rusty pair of gardening sheers?" Nancy asked.

"Nobody will believe they garden," he scoffed.

"That's why they're rusty. He does sleep around a lot," Nancy said. "Maybe she finally snapped."

"Yes! Murder suicide. I like the way you think, Wheeler," Eddie said.

"What are you two talking about over there?" Steve asked.

"Nothing!" Eddie and Nancy exclaimed.

"Anyway, there's a note. Pastor Young, who used to babysit me here, recognized these things and dug them out of the donation box. He must have brought them here right before he died," Steve said, shaking his head fondly. "Miss that old man."

"Fuck it," Eddie muttered.

He walked over to Steve and slipped his arms around his waist, pulling into a tight side hug. Eddie squeezed him.

"Uh, what's going on?" Steve asked.

Nancy copied Eddie and joined Steve on his other side, hugging him tightly as well.

"Okay, I don't know what this is, but it's nice," Steve said.

Once they dug through his childhood things, they moved over to his grandfather's boxes. They pulled out photographs and metals as well as several pieces of artwork that Steve did for Otis as a child. There were several photos of him and Steve when Steve was little. Eddie cooed at every single one of them. There were several more photos of Otis when he was younger with Steve’s Grandma, Irene.

"You have his eyes, Steve," Nancy noted as she gazed at a picture of young Otis in his uniform.

"I do?" Steve asked and looked over Nancy's shoulder. "Oh yeah."

Eddie joined Nancy at her other side to look at the photo.

"Yeah, definitely. You have his shoulders too," Eddie said.

"And his hair," Nancy added.

Eddie grinned as he watched Steve preen as he realized he had more in common with his grandfather than he thought he did. Eddie dug through the box and pulled out a picture frame. It was Otis in his uniform with his arm wrapped around a handsome man with rather curly thick hair and dark eyes. His face was littered with freckles. They were gazing at each other, and Eddie didn't think it looked all that platonic.

"Oh, hey, that's Steven," Steve said, looking over at Eddie's shoulder. "According to the date, it was about the time he and Gran got engaged."

"There's something wedged in the back," Eddie said. "I'll fix it."

He opened up the back, and another photo slipped out. Steve caught and read the back.

"Thanks for letting me take this picture. You gentlemen are lovely together. One day, you'll be able to show everyone your love, and they'll accept you as I do. Love always, your best friend, Irene," Steve read off the back and flipped the picture over. "Oh, wow."

Eddie scurried to look over his shoulder, as did Nancy. Otis and Steven's arms were wrapped around each other as they locked lips.

"Okay, there has to be journals around here that have more information," Eddie said with wide eyes. "I need to know more about them. I mean, if you don't mind."

"I think he wouldn't mind at all. He would probably be happy to know that there were more people like him learning about his story and his struggles," Steve said.

"Especially his grandson," Eddie said with a grin as he nudged him.

The three of them started to dig around the room, trying to find anything with journals in it. It was Nancy who found a box under the bed. When she opened it, they discovered tons of journals. They eagerly started to dig through them, each taking turns to read them as they learned more about Otis Harrington. It helped that it was written more like a novel.

Before Otis had gotten drafted, he had worked in his father's barber shop in Hawkins. Irene Callahan was his best friend in the world, and their parents were sure they were going to get married. Of course, they weren't at all aware of Otis's secret: He was gay. Women held no interest for him, not even Irene. Turns out, though, Irene was more than okay with that because there wasn't a single man or woman alive who held any interest for her, and she had doubted that it would ever happen. They eventually agreed that they would get married. . . It was safer that way, and Irene didn't want to get stuck with someone she couldn't stand. And even though it was a marriage without romantic love and sexual attraction, it was a marriage built on love. And they were happy.

"That's cool, though, that they had a marriage like that. Just like a friendship marriage. And that Irene could be like that," Steve said. "My grandparents were awesome."

"That they were. You know, my best friend, Ronnie, is a lot like your grandma. She's at NYU studying to become a lawyer," Eddie said.

"For the longest time, I thought I was like that. I wasn't really interested in anyone or in dating. I mean, besides that tiny crush on Tom Cruise. Until Steve came along, I wasn't sure I could like anyone," Nancy said.

"Hmm, maybe you're pansexual," Eddie said.

"Pansexual?" Nancy asked.

"It's like where it doesn't matter what gender someone is. You're like attracted to what's inside a person," Eddie said.

"Like their fluids and stuff?" Steve asked.

"No!" Eddie snorted with laughter. "You're like attracted to people and not what's on the outside. While bisexuality focuses more on gender and neither sexuality is wrong. Look, I was confused about my own sexuality for years, I'm not sure if I can explain someone else's. It's whatever feels comfortable with you. Hell, you don't even need to have a label if you don't want to. I'll take you guys up to Indie, and I will take you to this place my friend took me. I think exploring your sexuality is something that you need to do for yourself."

"So, you're not going to guide me like a queer Yoda?" Nancy asked, her eyes twinkling with delight.

"A Quoda!" Steve exclaimed, and Nancy giggled.

"I hate you guys," Eddie said, grinning as he swiped the journal from Steve’s hands.

Before Otis and Irene had even gotten engaged, however, a man had moved into town to open up his own diner. He had stumbled upon the town of Hawkins and decided to move to this quaint, quiet town. He had come from the large noisy city of New York, and he was looking for some small town charm.

"Small town charm? What they don't tell you about small towns could fill a book," Eddie said, causing Steve and Nancy to snort while sharing a look. "Or a TV show."

When Steven Jones stepped foot into the barber shop, Otis had been smitten with him almost immediately. They became fast friends, all three of them, and from that moment on, it felt like they had always been friends. They were inseparable. That summer was the best time for all of them. Otis and Steve fell in love while Irene had the pleasure of watching unfold. She even helped keep it a secret. Wartime soon fell upon them like dark clouds on the cusp of a great big storm. And when rumors started popping up, it was Irene's idea to get married, treating it as a celebration of their friendship. While she was married to Otis in the spirit of friendship, she knew the romantic marriage was between Otis and Steven. She had a secret ring made for Steven to wear around his neck. So while Irene and Otis had a huge church wedding with Steven standing beside Otis, they had a secret wedding for Steven and Otis in this very apartment with Irene officiating. Steven had deemed it a coin marriage, both with different sides and both of equal value. One side was romantic, one side platonic.

"A fucking coin marriage," Eddie said. "Your grandparents were brilliant."

It all came crashing down when both Otis and Steven had gotten drafted, leaving Irene to look after the salon with Otis's father. Letters between the three of them were stuck between the pages of the book. They were filled with longing and fear, all three of them separated by war. The last letter spoke of Steven and Otis meeting on the same battlefield, finally together again. Eddie's shakily turned the page.

"Otis had returned home, to the joy of his father and his wife, but Steven. . . Steven would never come home again. And when Otis stood in front of his wife, he placed Steven's necklace in her palm as he drew her into a kiss. To anyone else, he was greeting his wife with a loving kiss, but they knew differently. Salty tears from both sides, it was a kiss filled with sadness. . .two lips clinging to each other in a comforting hug as they mourned for the loss for the man they loved so differently and completely. . . The man who loved with every fiber of his being and who couldn't carry hate in his heart for anyone even when he was fighting on the battlefield. He showed his love through food, and taking care of people was like his special language. Hawkins would be a lot less brighter with one less star, and Otis would always be missing a piece of his heart. . . "

Eddie put the journal down, sniffling as he wiped his eyes. He let out a choked sob, trying to ignore Steve and Nancy's own sniffles. They took a moment to collect themselves, and Nancy took the journal from him. The journal had skipped ahead several months later, with Otis addressing it to his beloved. . .to Steven. Otis and Irene were discussing ways they could possibly have a child. There was really only one way they could. . . With a turkey baster. They had talked about it in depth, trying to figure out if they were trying to fill the hole in their lives. After a lot of talking, they figured out that it was something that they really wanted. Several months later, they welcomed a baby boy and named him Jonathan after Irene's father, who had passed during the beginning stages of her pregnancy. As he grew, John was a happy boy who loved both of his parents. He was witty and sharp, but as the years went by, he started befriending the more popular kids who were very arrogant. They didn't believe in people who strayed far from the path, who stood out. John had firmly believed that his parents' marriage were like everyone else's, a little silly perhaps but did not stray too far from the path. Otis had decided that John had been old enough to learn the truth, and he had trusted him to be able to handle it. That had been a mistake.

" . . . Watching the love fade from my son's eyes had been hard to watch, and seeing it be replaced with disgust had been even harder. I'm looking at him now, even though he's right next to me, and I miss him. I wish I never told him at all. . . "

Nancy paused, her bottom lip trembling as she gazed at Steve.

"Fuck," Eddie and Steve cursed.

"Continue," Steve said, swallowing thickly.

" . . . It would be my fault for whatever comes next with him. I've always ignored it when other people spewed hateful things, and I never felt ashamed for being who I am until the hate started coming from my own son. My father had died and left the salon to me, but he died knowing who I was. He accepted and loved me all the same even if he didn't understand it himself. The worst part was when we would go out in public, and John wanted to keep the image up of us being a happy family. I always tried to make sure that he knew he came from love, created with love even though it wasn't the conventional way. All he felt was betrayal, and I couldn't help but feel like it was all my fault. . . "

"That's bullshit! It's not his fault. He was just being honest about who he is and my father . . . Well, if he hasn't learned by now that he's the asshole in this situation, then he's probably never going to," Steve scowled.

"Steve. . . ," Nancy said softly. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Maybe after. Let's just finish," Steve said and took the journal from her.

As the years went by, John argued with his parents about getting help. . .about needing to be fixed. It always ended the same way, with John being kicked out, leaving his parents to cry over their son and wishing Steven was still with them. He still tried to keep up with visiting his parents, and eventually, he dropped the subject, but he always looked at them funny. Instead, he talked about the insurance company he was building with his friends and bragged about how well it was going, making jabs about how Otis was still a barber. When he turned his insults to Irene, it had been the last straw and kicked John out. He had been planning on giving the house to John, but after disowning him for a time, he sold it to someone else. Irene and Otis moved into the apartment above the salon. The next time that they had talked to their son, he announced he was married to a wonderful woman. They could tell that he didn't even love her, not even platonically. She was desperate for his love, though, and was willing to give him anything even children to keep up the image of the importance of family. She hated kids, though. Steve paused and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"You okay?" Eddie asked softly.

"I just - I always suspected that this is why my mother had me, but I had hoped that there was some part of her. . . Some part of her that loved me," Steve said as he struggled not to cry.

"Steve. . .," Nancy said and reached out to touch his knee.

"Let's just . . . Get on with this," Steve said.

When Margaret had announced her pregnancy, Otis and Irene tried to focus on the fact that there would be a grand baby on the way. They didn't want to think about how Margaret looked sour during the announcement and that John had looked happy about it for all the wrong reasons. It was just a means to end for him, another piece to maintain the image that he was on the right path. Irene spent all of her time working on making a teddy bear for the baby, making it out of John's clothes and putting all of her love into it. Just after finishing it, Irene's heart gave out. There was too much damage, and he sat with her on her deathbed with John nowhere to be found. He had been too busy at work, too busy to say goodbye to his own mother, and Otis knew he would regret it for the rest of his life.

"I'll give Steven my love. I'll leave some for you and John to give to the baby," she had smiled weakly. "Wouldn't it be wonderful if they named the baby Steven? It's such a lovely name."

They had been her last words, and Otis had been distraught as she slipped away even more so after she was gone. He had never felt more alone in his life. John and Margaret had stood at the back of the funeral. When John did approach him later, he didn't say anything, but he did look regretful. For the first time in a while, Otis was looking through the eyes of his son. He should have known that it was too good to last. They hadn't called him when Margaret had gone into labor. John had shown up with the baby in his arms and gave the bundle to him. He declared that he didn't have time to take care of him, and Margaret didn't want anything to do with the baby. Though Otis had felt sad for the baby in his arms, he also felt love and joy. He had come up with the perfect name. Steven Ira Harrington.

"Your middle name is Ira?" Eddie asked.

"Yeah," Steve said. "Problem?"

"No, Ira-really like it," Eddie said with a cheesy grin.

"That was so stupid," Nancy giggled, and Steve laughed in agreement.

The next few years of his life had been busy. The divider had been built by James Hopper Sr and his son, Jimmy. It was a name only Otis was allowed to call him. Occasionally, Jimmy would come into help with the wall but would also help look after baby Steve. Tucked in between the pages was a picture of young Hopper bouncing baby Steve in his lap while Steve laughed and reached for his face. It wasn't long after that Jimmy had gotten married and left for New York. Raising Steve had kept Otis busy for the next few years, and when he got sick, he started to write less. When he lost the use of his hands, he stopped writing all together. He did manage to write one more thing.

"Steve, if you find these journals, please don't think less of me. . . And Steven. . .oh, Steven. . . He may not be yours by blood, but somehow, he managed to inherit your heart. . . . "

"If anything, I think more of you," Steve whispered and then paused. "He never talked about that friend of his who did that piece of artwork downstairs."

"Well, I think there might be a couple of journals missing, judging by the dates," Nancy said.

"Pastor Young probably took them when he dropped off my things," Steve said.

"Or maybe Pastor Young did the artwork," Eddie said, and then he gasped. "Maybe Pastor Young was Otis's lover."

"Maybe that's why he took the notebooks. He didn't want anyone to know," Nancy said.

"That would explain why he was so involved in my life," Steve said. "And why he had a key. Now that I think about it, he did sleep over a lot, and he never slept on the couch. Jesus, it was right there in front of me. I mean, he was there even until the end. Although, after Grandpa died, he didn't come around a lot, and then he died. My father probably told him to stay away if he figured out what he was to my grandfather. My fucking parents. . . "

Eddie watched his face flash through several mixed emotions. His own father was an asshole who breezed in and out of his life. He was finally out of it for good.

"I know what it's like," Eddie blurted out.

"What?" Steve asked.

"To have a parent come in and out of your life, not caring about you. I spent so many years trying to catch my father's attention only to realize he wasn't going to care about me. I did have someone who always did, who I took for granted. My uncle was always the dad that I needed in my life. He was the one who taught me how to care. You had not one, not two but three grandparents. Even though two of them never got to meet you, it seems they left their love behind in Otis which he passed onto you," Eddie said.

"And you've passed it onto me and to the kids. They communicate it through their actions, especially Dustin, who takes care of you as much as you do him," Nancy said. "And you taught Max that she could stand up for herself. You gave them an example of what a good older brother should be, just like your grandfather showed you what a good parent is supposed to be. You showed them that love can look differently to many people, and it doesn't have to be romantic. And even if they don't say, they show it. . .they love you, and I think they do that by making sure that you never feel alone ever again. They do that even by filling up your house with noise and dirt. They chose to be a part of your life. And I know you love them that just as much as they love you."

Steve burst into tears, his body shaking with sobs. Eddie immediately wrapped his arms around him, hugging him tightly. He turned to Nancy and pulled her into the middle of them. Eddie and Nancy hugged him tightly, unknowingly solidifying their bond even further into a deeper and more permanent one.

Chapter Eight

[eddieismypimp]

My love, are you okay?

Chapter 1: I haven't seen you around before

Wanings: definite grammar errors, cussing, cringe lowkey, probably major spelling errors. nothing to major or serious. That will be happening in the later chapters.

A/N: This is quite literally terrible but maybe it's because I'm rusty. I haven't wrote in a while. I hope you guys enjoy anyway and I hope it gets better in the future chapters.

My POV:

Five days. It's been five days since I officially moved to the little, weird town of Nockfell. Five days since I started my job at the record store, and five days since I've had any interaction with anyone I actually ENJOYED conversing with. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad I made the decision to move out on my own, I love my job, but I didn't realize how lonely I would be with no one here. Today has been especially excruciating considering my manager only had me scheduled today and there's only been two customers. I looked at the clock... I still had an hour and a half until I can clock out and go home to cuddle with my cat Dior. She was a cute, fluffy black cat. She's a cuddle bug too. I slumped over the desk with a groan. I would kill to be at home relaxing with Dior right now.... Just as I was daydreaming about being home in my comfy bed, watching netflix, I heard the chime of the front door. Oh thank god. I thought, standing up straight, looking towards the door. I saw a group of about 5 people walk in. "Hi guys!" I said. Getting a chorus of hey's, and hi's in return. "Welcome in, let me know if there's anything you need help with" I say. "Alright, thank you!" A guy with long brown hair responded barely even acknowledging my existence as they explored the store. "No problem!" I said, walking around the store, putting records away, pretending that I had been working the whole time. I took some time to observe the people who came in. There was a guy with long brown hair, a boy with dark skin with his arm around the shoulders of a boy with bright orange hair, a pale girl with long dark brown hair and a very pale guy with long blue hair and.... a mask? I looked at the person in interest and confusion. Then they spoke to the guy with the brown hair. "Larry look, they have it!" He said holding up a record, I couldn't see the artist though. Damn... he's got a deep voice.... lowkey got some muscle to him too... I don't know if this is my mask kink talking but he's kinda fine..."Hell yeah!" The guy he called Larry shouted, walking over to him. I decided to walk over to the two, maybe I could even make friends with them so I wouldn't be so lonely here. I doubt it though, I'm absolutely terrible at making conversation. "Hey, you guys finding everything okay?" I asked with a smile. You couldn't have thought of anything more basic? I thought, scolding myself internally. They paused for a moment, both giving me a once over. A few seconds go by neither one of them saying anything until the guy with brown hair nudges the guy with blue hair with his elbow. He cleared his throat. "Oh, uh, yeah. We're good." He says. Damn...I thought, Boring ass response. "Okay." I say with a smile and beginning to walk off, accepting the fact that these people probably did not want to be bothered by the worker. "Uh, wait.." I heard one of them say. I turned around. "What's up?" I asked politely.

Sal's POV:

Larry, Neil, Todd, Ashley and I decided to go to the record store today. Sanity's Fall released a new album a couple days ago and we were hoping the record store would have it. We were greeted as soon as we walked in. We all let out a hey, or a hi. I looked over to see who the voice was connected to and my breathe hitched. Holy shit.....I've never seen her before...she's gorgeous... "Welcome in, let me know if there's anything you need help with" She says. "Alright, thank you!" Larry responded, going to walk in the opposite direction. "Larry," I said walking up to him. "What's up?" He asked looking through records. "Bro, look at the worker, shes so hot." I said pointing to where she was standing putting some records away. She had brown skin, black super curly hair, a lip piercing, both sides of her nose done, her septum done, her eyebrow... multiple tattoos on her arms and legs. She was wearing a maroon corset, black skirt with two chains hanging from it, and black platforms. My god.. Larry chuckled. "She is hot bro, go get her man, go talk to her." Larry said nudging me towards her. "No man... she's way to hot for me." I said pushing him back. "Shut up." He said laughing. Then we split off into our own directions looking for the Sanity's fall record. After barely even a minute of looking I found the Sanity's fall record. "Larry look, they have it!" I said. "Hell yeah!" Larry said walking over to me. "Hey, you guys finding everything okay?" I heard. I turned my head. I knew it was her but I was still taken by surprise to see her standing so close. I took her in, seeing her piercings and tattoos up close. I saw a tattoo of a pumpkin on her wrist and bats going up her arm. There was alot more but those are the main ones that caught my eye. I didn't realize I was just staring until Larry nudged me. I cleared my throat. "Oh, uh, yeah. We're good." I say, internally cursing myself for that boring ass response. "Okay." She said with a smile, turning to walk away. I couldn't let her walk away, I had to say something. . "Uh, wait.." I say nervously. Nice one dumbass.. She turned around! Thank god. "What's up?" She asked politely. Think Sal, come on... "Are you from here? I haven't seen you around before?" I asked. She smiled. "No, I'm not from here," She said, "I actually just moved here like five days ago." "Oh, that's cool!" I said a little to enthusiastically, "Do you have family or friends here?" I hope she doesn't think that was creepy.

My POV:

"Do you have family or friends here?" He asked me. I smiled slighlty, glad he's attempting to continue the conversation but also not knowing if I should answer truthfully or not. Considering I still didn't even know his name. Yes he's hot but he's still a whole ass stranger. Fuck it.."Nope," I decided to answer truthfully, "I decided to move out on my own. I don't know why I chose somewhere with absolutely no one that I know." I say, nervously chuckling. He chuckled a little too. I noticed that the Larry guy had walked away to join his other friends and left the blue haired guy here alone to converse with me. "Doesn't that get lonely though?" He asked sounding genuinely concerned. I sighed. "Yeah, it does get pretty lonely, and boring," I say, "It's just my cat and I." "You have a cat?!" He asked excitedly. "Yes! Her name is dior." I said with a smile. "I have a cat too, his name is Gizmo." He said. "Awww, I love cats." I said in adoration. "I do too," He said, "So, whats your name?" He asked, he semed a little nervous or anxious. Glad I'm not the only one. "My name is y/n," I said, sticking my hand out. This feels way to formal, why the hell did I stick my hand out... "My name is Sal." He said, thankfully taking my hand in his and shaking it, making me feel less awkward. "Hi Sal." I said sweetly. "Hi y/n." He mocked in a playful way making me chuckle a bit. "Well.. if you ever need someone to hang out with or something... my friends and I would be down.." He said, looking down, putting a hand on the back of his neck. I damn near let out a squeal. Fuck yeah.. thank you god. Okay, okay y/n, compose yourself. Keep your cool. "Uh, yeah," I said smiling, "I would love that!" To enthusiastic girl come on now...He chuckled. "Cool.. can I have your number?" He asked, holding out his phone to me. "Sure." I said, taking the phone from him and putting my number in. He took his phone back. "I guess I'll be texting you." He said. "I hope so." I said, looking him up and down, trying to sound flirty. Hopefully that was sexy and not dumb as shit. "Y-yeah," He said, turning to go join his friends again. "I'll see you." "Yeah, I'll see you." I said, walking back to the register.

Sal's POV:

I actually asked for her number, fuck yeah. Go Sal. "I guess I'll be texting you." I said, trying to sound confident. "I hope so." She said looking me up and down. My god that was sexy. "Y-yeah," I said. Goddamn stuttering. "I'll see you." I said, turning around to head back to everyone. "Yeah, I'll see you." She said with that sweet voice of hers. Fuck... my jeans are tight...

[puhpandas]

This might come off as controversial, but Steel Wool is not immune to criticism. I don’t like how Steel Wool is treating Gregory for numerous reasons, but them setting him up to be a bad person feels wrong when no other child character is treated this way. They don’t want to acknowledge him as a victim and like okay, we get it, we hardly see his trauma, but hello? Is he not still a child? How is he any different from other kid protagonists that wanted to live in this franchise?

There’s a higher standard for the games sure, but it’s weird to me that background book characters get treated way better. They don’t want him to be exactly like Cassie, which understandable, but we’ve already seen few Cassie characteristics from him? To ignore that is ignoring a big part of his character. Why would he do anything in the story then if he was just as bad and destructive as they portray him as? He still needs motives, even if they want to strip him of any characterization so we never feel bad for him. They’re actively refusing giving him positive attributes because they’d hate it if he started challenging other characters/fans favs, but that’s what makes a good story compelling. It feels like they’re taking their anger out on him through their writing if that makes sense?

I’m a little concerned he’s gonna be the one who dropped the elevator because it feels true, otherwise why would RUIN be so full of blatant Gregory hate? They want us to hate him, that’s quite all there is to it.

them never showing us him as a character on a normal day and only when hes in a life or death situation making a split second decision that could decide the fate of himself and everyone he loves definitely has something to do with it. they only show his 'blunt' decisions to do something bad for a good reason, and not what he would be making that decision for. we never get to see him just be a normal kid, we never get to see him after sb deserving to have that happy ending, we only see the bad

but I dont feel like this is just. we hate this 12yo character and like the other one better so we're making him evil and shitting on him. they probably do want people to see the bad things he did for a reason that we dont know yet.

them framing Gregory as cutting the elevator whether he did it or not was very blatant in that decision. it feels like they want to give him a 'redemption arc' in the eyes of the fandom in come kind of way since people have disliked him from the very beginning. like they want us to see him do these bad things, and then maybe theyll actually show us that he didnt want to do these things later, and maybe things will be different.

like, I cant be the only one who feels like Gregory and the elevator is a setup for something. obviously to trap cassie down below, but in that case they didnt have to make Gregory be the one do drop it, just blatantly the mimic. they want us to believe this for a reason, and that would be to show us at the very least a reasoning later. I dont believe that reason is just "we fucking hate this child character and want everyone else to as well" that's just. crazy to me.

they wouldnt make Gregory do many kind things for other characters if they hated him. they wouldnt have had him comfort cassie on her birthday and make them canonically close friends if they wanted to make him genuinely heartless.

keep in mind that with SBs nuked characterization and no focus on Gregory since then, we havent even gotten to see his pov in a long time. just Cassies so far, and Cassies story is pretty much built off of perspective. the MIMIC is literally a tool to make characters perspectives about eachother change or distort because it would frame a character as doing something they didn't

mimic is literally going to be used to cause confusion and distrust within characters and it literally did that and accomplished that in ruin. cassie is going to believe Gregory cut the elevator whether he did it or not. and that's why I genuinely believe he didnt. why on earth would they introduce a character that's main purpose would be to do bad things to characters in another characters name to cause drama and then just. have the character have actually have done it lmao.

TLDR: I dont believe steel wool would steep as low as to make a 12yo kid trying to survive actually evil or even just hate him as the creators, and I also think the story of cassie and ruin and beyond is designed off of making Gregory look bad (the mimics purpose as a villain being causing uproar and doing bad things in another characters name to cause distrust from another) from Cassies perspective so he can appear later and disprove those beliefs as a sort of 'redemption arc' to cassie and the fans

[foxufortunes]

So like I was actually having this discussion in the comments of one of my fics at stupid in the morning, but like having thought it through for the day I'm here to messily rant my thoughts on the complicated relationship between the upperclassmen, mainly Dan, and the monsters, mainly Andrew, and Wymack. How Dan is terribly self righteous and hypocritical and lets her emotions get in the way of her captaincy at times. How Andrew doesn't care for the discomfort and fear he causes others and even revels in it, even without provocation. And how Wymack, for better or for worse, is a hands off coach who can't/won't inflict meaningful punishments on his team, even enabling their worst qualities and habits, as part of his ideal of giving people more chances and how that can create a hostile team environment.

Aka, I'm about to throw slander in every direction, because these are flawed, messy characters and trying to make any of them perfectly innocent or always right does a disservice to the well sketched, messy, imperfect, flawed characters Nora created. Blame goes everywhere and no one is innocent. Trauma is a reason, not an excuse.

Buckle up, guys, this is about to get long and messy.

So, let's start with Wymack, who's a bit trickier to explain than Dan and Andrew, but is also the reason they've been brought togethers. Wymack, as we see him on page, is a massively hands off coach, especially when you compare him to Coach Rhemann. Now, it's very possible that this is actually because Nora either wasn't confident/good enough to write him coaching vs where she is now ten years later, or because she didn't want to focus there (although logically for exy junkie Neil's pov that would be weird, but whatever, that's not what we're talking about) but whatever the reason out of universe, it leaves us with Wymack as hands off as possible in universe. (Also, sidebar, some people in this fandom need to learn that out of universe reasons still need to have an in universe reason, "it needed to happen for the plot" is an out of universe reason, but I still need to know why the characters did it beyond "for the plot" or it's bad writing, stop using that for an answer about "why did character X do Y?")

Anyway, Wymack lets the team basically run amuck and sort themselves out, and even enables their worst habits. I think its canon that Abby gets a tip when "random" drug tests are happening, and they certainly don't do anything to enforce the no drugs policies the school and NCAA and probably ERC would have. Wymack brought a bunch of troubled kids together and seems to have no plan beyond letting themselves work it out and Betsy's here if there's trouble. This is why the Matt situation happens. You let a struggling to stay sober drug addict be around other not even trying drug addicts, of course Matt was going to get worse. This is actively bad for him. And in turn then actively bad for Aaron.

His relationship with Andrew is a bit more complicated. Now, I need you to forget everything you know about Andrew through Neil and his backstory for a moment, and just look at Andrew through Wymack's eyes as he first met him. Andrew has been to juvie, and is currently on parole for another violent crime that Wymack may or may not know the actual details about and on medication that Wymack may or may not know what they actually are and do. Andrew asks to come off of them. Wymack says yes. Now, even putting aside the legality of this, Wymack took the unilateral decision that Andrew knows best about his meds and can come off of them. Now, we can talk plenty about how Andrew's medication is portrayed in canon, but plenty of people don't like meds that are actually good for them and try/do stop taking them, often without telling a doctor they're doing so. There's also the fact that, again irrelevant of what we know as the story goes, Andrew regularly drinks, smokes and misses doses, things that can all make medication not work as it should. Wymack is not a doctor, for all he knows he could actively making Andrew worse by allowing this, but does anyway, for a good defence line.

(Also another side note, where does canon get off calling the Foxes a laughing stock? They're five years old. Seth was part of the first batch, right? So they're five years old and made the championships in their fourth year of existing as a team, fuck off are they dead last laughing stocks.)

And this is part of what I don't get about Wymack. He both wants to win above what's good for his team and doesn't at the same time. For example, he's so hands off and enables their bad habits, things that could kill them and actively harm them. He puts Andrew on the bench because he doesn't need a third goalie despite him being better and seemingly rolls with the hierarchy of age over skill, which implies team feel goods over victory but is so invested in staying Class I he semi-regularly lets (and yeah, it's lets not makes but still) Andrew harm himself playing full games on withdrawals (again, as far as he knows potentially stopping his meds working right). And while it could be argued his situation with Andrew is more not wanting to give up on Andrew, that is an the expense of his other players. Anyone who's ever been in a situation where one or two people are hostile/seemingly unpunishable knows how bad that makes everyone else feel.

Because, let's be real, Andrew is unpunishable and they all know it. Cardio is one thing, but he doesn't go through with marathons and nothing else will work. Andrew doesn't care for his own contract, and even if we actually believed Wymack would go through with any threat again Kevin, Nicky or Aaron's contracts (and we all know he wouldn't) Andrew would probably sabotage the game in protest or just outright quit. Andrew gets away with everything and everyone knows it and that can quickly see your team stop respecting/trusting you or feeling safe when you say they are. It's a very dangerous line.

And this is where we finally get to Dan. Because yes, Dan hates Andrew, and is unprofessional in her bias against him. But I think we often forget where this comes from. You often see people talk about Columbia, and Andrew drugging Neil, and should Neil have been angrier, how his trauma impacted him moving on so quickly and whether Andrew's reasons were valid or not because he thought Neil was a threat. And sometimes you see people talk about what he did "to" Matt. Which, yes, wasn't great, and yes, Matt took the drugs himself, but really it wasn't a great move from Andrew. But how often do you see people talk about what he did to Dan?

I mean, let's get some context here. Andrew and Dan barely knew each other. Dan is already getting shit from every angle for daring to be a woman playing and captaining an exy team (and if you hc her as a woman of colour, double this) in a period of time where colleges did (and still do) have a terrible reputation for covering up the horrific assaults committed by their best NCAA athletes. And Andrew, with no provocation, or reason, invites her out, to his home turf, with his family, to a bar he worked out, without anyone to support her and look after her, and drugged her. To find out if she was a women worth following. Not because she was a threat. Because he wanted to find out what type of person she was. He wanted her tragic backstory and he wanted it now (something people criticise Dan for demanding a lot, by the way). Andrew and his group show no remorse and face no real repercussions and then go on to enable Matt getting falling off the wagon and taking potentially lethal mix of drugs, because his mom said it was fine so it's ok and it all worked out, ends justify the means, and is allowed to just carry on with again, no meaningful punishment. Because no harm, no foul, right? (funny how you'll apply that to Andrew but hate when Thea said it, huh?)

Is it any wonder Dan doesn't like or trust Andrew?

And lets be clear, Andrew does nothing to discourage this. Andrew doesn't want to be understood, he doesn't want to share. Andrew is not here angsting because no one understands his attempts to making friends (except maybe, big maybe, Aaron not understanding his attempts at brothering). Andrew is fine if the team doesn't trust him. He encourages it, because trust means friends means feelings means weakness and that's ew. It's not hard to see how, from Dan's pov, Wymack can't/won't punish Andrew and is more interested in winning so won't kick him off the team.

At the same time, Dan is just as complicit in Andrew's breaking the law and hurting himself by missing meds as Wymack. Again, for all she knows, his meds help him, and skipping could actively harm the help they're giving him. Again, she's putting winning, because they have this amazing goalkeeper, above both Andrew and the team's health, and then complains when he lashes out. Some meds need a consistent balance to work, and maybe if he wasn't skipping every Friday to help you win he'd be more stable (we know this isn't the case, but they don't). There's barely any resistance put up to the idea that Andrew plays entire games, because she also wants to win more than she cares about Andrew's health, while at the same time not caring about winning more than her pride, like the rest of the team who are more interested in fighting than winning.

Now, of course, Andrew doesn't care. I think Nicky has it right early on when he says Andrew doesn't care about your boundaries, just his. Andrew is here mostly because he wants to keep Nicky and Aaron close and sees providing value for them (protection, scholarships, controlling protection ect) as the only way to really do it. Andrew sees life as exchanges. But, for all we act like Andrew lives on fair exchanges, he doesn't. As I said, he drugged Dan because he wanted to know about her, what did he give her in return? Nothing. He violated her autonomy and gave her nothing in return. Not even his own backstory. Arguably not even respect. (please, take a minute to imagine how pissed you would be if someone in fanfic wrote Andrew being drugged just to get him to spill his trauma without him even being a threat to anything, or look at how people react to Neil's Columbia scene).

The upperclassmen constantly ignore and violate Andrew's boundaries in very clear ways, and any normal team would have backed off ages ago (or called the cops the first time he pulled a knife) but because they're Foxes they keep pushing. (Also, for all fandom likes to make him a knife nut, look at how often he actually pulls a knife vs punches, it's either rape jokes, or him/someone under his protection being cornered, day to day he goes without). Now, of course, Andrew is a lot of the problem of keeping the team in two halves (again, something any decent coach shouldn't allow to get that extreme) as we see with how well the team works when Andrew is at Easthaven, but we don't know how much effort the upperclassmen actually make (excluding Renee of course).

The upperclassmen are often the first to lash out, and Andrew is often only retaliating, and then the monsters will be blamed. And yes, this is complete hypocrisy. But from the more general day to day treatment, not in the moment when a punch is thrown but attitudes in general, Andrew has proven himself a threat over and over, without provocation. If you can excuse Andrew drugging Neil because he's a potential threat, then why is Dan being hostile to Andrew because he's proven himself a threat different? Is it professional? Probably not, but what else can Dan do? She can't punish Andrew and Wymack seemingly can't/won't either. In Dan's mind, she is being hypervigilant and watching Andrew and taking his actions for the worst possible scenario, because Andrew has given her reason to. A simple drink to get to know each other turned into drugging her and Matt being in awful condition. Why should she give him the benefit of the doubt? Andrew wouldn't return the favour.

In many ways, Andrew and Dan are mirrors of each other. The leaders of their respective groups, both constantly trying to watch out for threats, but while Dan sees the threat she's already experienced with Andrew, Andrew considers her nothing. He's already got all her secrets and cast her aside, not caring for the damage he's done, because she and her friends are nothing to, and he doesn't feel a hint of remorse. He did what he had to, the ends justify the means, and Wymack's gone through too much to get him to risk losing him. He's on a team that doesn't care about his boundaries any more than he cares about theirs and is more than happy to play the monster if it gets the job done.

This came off a little harsh on Andrew, despite that I love him and Dan actually grates on me, but honestly the start of the series he is kind of awful and Dan I can see where she's coming from. Like, I think sometimes we also forget even Neil hates Andrew at the start of the series. Everything he did with Neil, he did with the others, it's just that Neil had the persistence, and the trauma related need to compartmentalise and move on quickly rather than hold a grudge, and a usefulness to Andrew (and yeah, let's not forget the breakthrough is Kathy's show and Andrew realising Neil is useful to him) to let him get in with Andrew so he can start to see the real him, while Andrew keeps the upperclassmen at arm's length.

And wow, congrats and thanks to anyone who read all the way through this monster ramble.

[novemberhope]

So... I did a thing and decided to write Neri into the live action timeline. This takes place somewhere shortly before they meet Usopp. So far, it's just Luffy, Nami and Zoro on the crew as well as Neri whom they just have met.

It's kind of from Neri's POV and the reason she's calling them by their titles rather than their names when thinking about them is that she still does not trust them. I think she will start to trust Luffy first because really how can you not?

tw: assault (Neri gets assaulted here but is saved before anything bad can happen) English is not my first language so sorry if the writing feels weird, I haven't written a story in english in a while

"Stop inviting random people onto our ship. Especially if there's nothing they can contribute." "But… she's nice… and I wanted to help her… I'm sure she'll find a place in our crew!" "For the last time, we are not a crew!" The swordsman's words hurt and Neri, not waiting for the captain's answer, slowly moved away from the door. Sure, it had been nice of the rubber boy to help her out when she was on the run from her pursuers. Still, she shouldn't have come with them. This wasn't her place to be, this wasn't her home. The moment these people would learn who - or rather, what - she really was, she would end up being sold again. She would never be safe on a ship where she could come in contact with water so easily. The ship was still at the harbor. This was as good a time as any to leave the ship. She felt sad for the captain to had so nicely offered her a place in his crew, but it was too dangerous. And while rubber boy had been nothing but kind to her, the other two hadn't been as friendly. They clearly didn't trust her. And really, who could blame them? She hadn't been able to tell them anything without giving away her real species, so of course they didn't trust her. And once they knew… mermaids brought in the big cash, especially here in the East Blue, where they were so rare - it would only get her back to where she had fled from. After everything that had happened, after losing everyone she cared about, she wanted a home, a family, a place where she belonged. But this was not it. This could never be it. "Hey, where are you going?" the red-headed navigator asked when Neri slowly tried to climb off the ship. "I… have something… I mean… there's something I need to do", she stammered. She didn't want to say she was leaving - even that didn't feel safe anymore. Just disappear, she told herself. They barely know you. They will move on and you can… Well, that was the thing, the only place she probably would be safe was Fishman Island but it was all the way out there on the Grandline, the Pirate's Graveyard… and to get there, she would have to get on a ship - the very thing she couldn't do because on a ship, she would come in contact with water sooner or later and then everyone would know… "Well, suit yourself," the navigator said with a shrug. "Just be aware, we'll be heading out soon. If you're not back by then…" Neri nodded. She wouldn't be back by then and she figured the navigator knew that. Quickly, she left the ship and started to walk across the harbor, pushing past people. It was a small island but the harbor was still pretty busy during this time of the day. There were people loading the ships, sailors were coming and going, children playing in the middle of all this, running around and causing people to stumble, and passengers impatiently waiting to board one of the bigger ships. It was almost too much noise to handle but Neri kept on walking. For a moment, she thought someone had called her name - maybe the captain? It sounded like him. He had saved her the other day and invited her to join them and she had actually liked him. Still, it wasn't meant to be. Surely, he would understand that she had made her decision. She kept on walking without looking back.

Leaving the harbor, it got even more crowded. There was a market nearby and people all went into this direction, pushing Neri with them. She started to feel anxious. It was too loud, too crowded, too many people just shoving her out for their way when she wasn't walking fast enough. But walking on land was still something she was getting used too. Under the sea, things were not like this - not this crowded, not this loud, not this harsh. Nearby, some men were starting to yell at each other. This brought back unpleasant memories from getting yelled at herself while being imprisoned. Quickly, Neri stepped sideways into the shadows. It was the entry to a side alley with huge, unpleasant smelling dumpsters lining the brick walls on both sides. It was quieter here, the further she kept walking, so she went on, ignoring the unpleasant smell. Maybe this alley would take her away from all the noise and all the people. Sure, she still had no place to go, but anything was better than here right now. But suddenly, she was no longer alone. Behind her, voices got louder and louder. They were talking to each other, it seemed. She stopped and leaned against a wall that belonged to a tall rundown warehouse building. Maybe they would walk past her, minding their own business. Unfortunately, as she had already learned, humans rarely did. These ones were no exception. They were adult males, three of them, with bottles in their hands, obviously already - or still - drunk at this time of the day. Neither of them looked too pleasant. Neri shrank back and just hoped and prayed they would walk past without noticing her. They nearly did. But then one of them turned his head and suddenly stopped. "Look at this," he said. "A little lady…" Quickly, Neri turned, and, avoiding eye contact, tried to keep walking. Unfortunately, she was immediately grabbed and yanked back. "Hey little lady, not so fast," the guy from before said. "Let's have a proper look at you, alright?" "No thank you," Neri muttered and started to run. Unfortunately, she immediately was grabbed. One of the guys was firmly holding her with her arms behind her back while the other two were leering at her. "Please let me go!" "Please let me go!" they mocked her. "There's no chance we're letting you get away, sweetheart. You're too pretty!" Neri started to panic. She tried to kick them, but they only laughed at her attempts to get free. One of them roughly yanked at her hair for trying to kick him. "Be nice," he warned her. "Or we'll show you just how nasty we can get!" "You're already nasty!" she replied, still struggeling. Was this really how it all would end? Were all humans like this? Other than the rubbery captain and his two friends, they all had treated her like shit. Ever since she had been caught and dragged on land, it had gotten worse and worse. "Let's show her just how nasty we can get," one of them laughed. They were all grabbing her now. She screamed and kicked and bit one of them in the arm, but that only resulted in her getting slapped in the face. Neri screamed again when she was thrown onto the dirty ground like a piece of trash. Then someone was over her - and then he wasn't anymore.

"And just what are you going to show her?" another voice asked. It was the swordsman's voice and Neri breathed a sign of relief. At the same time she was wondering how he got here and why he was here. She had thought the navigator had understood that she had left for good. "How is that any of your business?" one of the guys sneered. "Let's knock this freak out", the second one said. "Ummm, have you looked at him? He's carrying three swords," the third one said, slowly stepping back. "So what?" The first one rolled his eyes. "He can only use one at a time anyway." Next thing they knew, all three of them were bleeding. Their bottles were on the ground. And the swordsman was holding two of his swords. "I can get the third one out, too," he said. The first guy looked like he thought it would be a good idea to get into a fight, but luckily, the other two started dragging him away. Neri hastily got onto her feet. She wanted to turn and run away too but her legs were shaking. "Next time I'll see you, I'll cut off your hands," the swordsman called after them. They weren't even looking back. He turned his attention towards Neri. "And what are you doing? Why aren't you on the ship?" "I was… leaving?" She thought that had been quite clear and besides, neither he and the navigator had been too impressed when their captain had invited her to join them. "Oh yeah? Well next time, you run that by Luffy first. He still thinks you're on the crew." She threw him a look. "I thought you're not a crew?" "Well, Luffy thinks we are… and for now, we have some common goals, so… didn't you say you want to reach the Grandline too?" Yes, she wanted to get to Fishman Island - maybe there she would finally be save again… "Yes, but… I'm just a random person your captain picked up on the street," she said. "I heard you talking. And I mean, you're not wrong…" He grimaced. "Yeah, well, I'm trying to prevent Luffy from adding every weirdo we come across to this so-called crew. If you prove yourself to not be a weirdo… you're welcome to join as long as you pull your weight on board." Not a weirdo… well, from a human perspective, she definitely was weird. But maybe, just maybe… she could hide that a little longer until they were on the Grandline at least?

Looking down the dirty and dark alley, she realized that she needed a place to stay and people to rely on. This wasn't her world. She had to rely on someone else, even if it was only temporary. "I'll try not to be burden," she replied. "I've never been at sea before." Well, on a boat, she silently added. The swordsman turned and started walking and she hurried along to keep up with him. "How did you find me, anyway?" she wanted to know. "I didn't," he replied. "I was actually trying to take a shortcut. The streets on this island are just really confusing." "Are they?" she wondered, following him out of the alley. There was, after all, only one main road leading from the harbor in the direction of the market. "Are they not?" He looked back at her. "I mean, I can't even see the ocean from here." She didn't know if she should giggle or not. For someone wielding three swords, he was surprisingly clueless when it came to directions. "That's because you're looking in the wrong direction," she said, deciding to surpress the giggles for now. "The ocean's over there." Irritated, he looked around. Yes, there was the ocean, and it wasn't even that far away. The deep blue color could clearly be spotted from where they were standing. "Like I said, it's confusing," he grumbled. Finally, he walked in the right direction and she followed him, slightly amused. And maybe… her new crewmates weren't that perfect either? So perhaps she wouldn't feel completely out of place all the time…

The ship came into view and it looked ready to sail. It was a small one and there had already been talk about getting a bigger one. Luffy, the captain, was waving at them. "There you are! Come on, let's go!" Quicky, they climbed on board. "I'm sorry," Neri said to Luffy, feeling she should at least say something to explain the delay. "I was just…" "Got everything sorted out?" Luffy asked her, grinning. "Well, then I guess we're all set. Let's get going!" "Set the sails!" the navigator shouted at them. And soon, they were out at sea, the island behind them getting smaller and smaller. In front of them, the ocean shimmered in the deepest blue, spreading far and wide before them. It was a marvelous sight and Neri, leaning over the railing, with the wind in her long hair, suddenly felt very calm and at peace with her situation for the first time since she had been captured. Maybe, just maybe, everything would turn out okay?

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

ep 6. people | myj, jjk

sugar, spice, and everything nice ep 6. people.

pairing(s): yoonji x reader x jungkook

summary: Somehow, Min Yoonji found herself in a threesome with Jeon Jungkook and his girlfriend. Somehow. And of course it's not over, because how could Yoonji stop once she's started? And what the fuck is she supposed to do the morning after? Uh oh.

warnings: rated M (18+) for language; note: a discussion of depression, previous childhood abuse, touching on suicidal thoughts; pan!f!reader; pan!Yoonji; internalized homophobia; gay panic; f/f/m love triangle; threesome smut (heavy wlw focus, excessive kissing, scratching, voyeurism, m and f-receiving oral, f-masturbation, slight face-sitting); non-idol!AU - Yoonji's POV

--

Well, this was awkward.

In a book or movie, this would have been scene end. Case closed. In real life, Yoonji had to stand awkwardly in her own bedroom as Jungkook and his partner-in-crime cleaned themselves up in the bathroom. It had been a… messy situations, to say the least. She managed to throw her underwear and jeans into her laundry hamper and yanked on a pair of black sweatpants, going commando. Whether that was a good decision or not remained to be seen. She also couldn’t stand her bra dangling about under her sweater so she took it off. And put her sweater back on.

Yoonji didn’t know why she felt weird about being naked, but she did.

There was no rational reason to feel weird about it after what just transpired. Then again, what just transpired wasn’t rational. So. Yeah. Yoonji almost jumped when Jungkook walked into her bedroom.

Naked.

Uh, well, his clothes were all over the floor.

He saw her – obviously – and stopped moving for a moment, big eyes wide. Yoonji wasn’t sure what he expected. She looked away quickly, not wanting to make him feel uncomfortable with her staring, as if she hadn’t ogled him balls deep in another woman less than five minutes before.

“S-Sorry,” he blurted.

“It’s okay,” she replied much too quickly. She cleared her throat and spoke more calmly. “It’s cool.”

It, no, she wasn’t cool, but Yoonji had to say something.

“I… I’ll just, uh, find my pants…”

She made an unimpressed tut. “Why? I’ve seen everything.” And turned back.

Jungkook shot up, clutching his balled-up pants in front of his crotch.

“Uh… well…” He blinked quickly. “Dunno if you, uh, wanna… continue. ‘Cause you don’t have to. Or anything.”

Her cheeks heated up. It then occurred to Yoonji that, actually, she hadn’t seen much of Jungkook’s backside. The lower half, precisely. Since obviously he had taken his shirt off before for things like swimming. And such. She winced, not enjoying her own mental gymnastics. He continued giving her an uneasy, apprehensive look.

“Yoonji-noona?”

She was startled back into reality. Her eyes darted about.

“Jungkook, ah…”

He tilted his head at her, puzzled. “Uh?”

“I’m sorry if you… um. Feel left out.”

He scratched his head. “I don’t? Or, you mean…”

They stood there. Him naked and her not. Yoonji sighed. This wasn’t like her. Aren’t we friends? She couldn’t take this strangeness after all. Perhaps it was understandable, but she didn’t like it. “I’m not trying to be weird on purpose.” Even though it was weird. Definitely. “I don’t know. Eh, I do know. I’m still a little afraid of you and I, but at the same time I’m not since we’ve been through a lot in our friendship. And I’m… I’m wrapped up in her, I think,” she confessed. She forced herself to stop looking at the floor and at him.

Turned out, he was mindlessly staring at the floor too.

Jungkook looked back up. He smiled sheepishly.

“Me too.” His face contorted. “Uh, about you and me. And her. If that makes sense.”

She pursed her lips. “I certainly saw a side of you today.”

He grimaced. “Noona, please… Understand that it’s, uh, the moment… I get excited…” His hands shifted and kept the bunched pants in front of his crotch. “Don’t tell anyone…”

Yoonji scoffed. “Who the fuck am I gonna tell that I had a threesome with you and your girlfriend?”

“Dunno, but at least tell ’em I have a nice ass.”

He jerked and there she was standing in the doorway. Running a hand through her hair, amused smile, confidently naked. She did have a nice ass, Yoonji concluded. Unlike Jungkook, she had to also wash her face. Because of Yoonji, mostly. And Jungkook’s, er, enthusiasm. His girlfriend looked from one to the other. Her hair curled over her shoulder in that recently-had-sex kind of way.

She asked the obvious.

“Are we getting dressed?”

Very direct.

“Um.” Yoonji fidgeted with the waistband of her sweatpants. “I… I feel weird with no clothes on.”

The answer came from two months at the same time.

“Why?”

Why? Good question. She almost defended herself and then she saw Jungkook’s expression. Why. Her eyes drifted to behind him. Why, indeed. “I think… Maybe.” A thought occurred to her that she never previously said out loud but was probably true. “I think I’m scared to appear weak. Being naked makes me see myself as weak, somehow.”

Her admission was met with agreement.

“Of course. You are vulnerable.”

Yoonji raised her head to scorched eyes. The other woman ticked her head and walked around Jungkook, but not before shooting him a look and making his ears turn red. Then she focused back onto Yoonji.

“My guess is that you’re probably had a few sexual experiences that sucked in the emotions department?”

She hated how accurate she was. But all Yoonji could do was let out an annoyed puff.

“A few? Probably all.”

Instead of laughing or teasing her though, the other woman nodded. Yoonji rubbed her temples and pushed her hair back, out of her face. When Yoonji was younger, her hair had been straight cut bangs and a blunt bob, but as she got older, she kept it at longer length and opted for curtain bangs. Timeless. Classic. Borderline boring so no one would look twice at her. That was how she wanted it to be. She spied her grey-and-black sleeve at the edge of her vision. Until someone interfered, that is. She raised her gaze to hers.

“I used them,” Yoonji admitted. “All men. Even if I knew the truth…” She trailed off, but the implication was clear enough. “I’m still attracted to men, so… I became one of the guys. Can’t stray if you don’t have the option, right? It’ll be easier, I told myself. But, deep down, I knew.” She looked at Jungkook guiltily. Then back to the other woman.

And she said it.

“I’m scared to like a woman.”

She didn’t know why she said it. But, also, she knew. Woman was the first thought she had when she had met her that day in the park. She had felt the pull too, even if she hadn’t wanted to. Woman. For a long time, Yoonji thought she knew what that word meant. For a long time, she fought against what that word meant, not wanting to be confined to the cage that woman seemed to hold over her. Not because she was at odds with her gender, but because if she balked to it, then it meant that she needed to face herself more honestly. She didn’t want to think of herself as a liar, which probably explained why Yoonji jumped at the chance so impulsively once it was offered.

Shit.

It must have been a short second, but the other woman regarded her with indefinite understanding. She knew, somehow. As if she too went through this thought process at some point, although probably a long time ago, and could recognize it in Yoonji. And, for the first time in her life, Yoonji felt as if someone understood her on a deeper level than anyone else.

The corner of those tempting lips tugged upward.

“Hate to break it to you, but I think you already like a woman.” Light shrug. “At least enough to fuck.”

A muscle in Yoonji’s eyelid twitched.

“You’re so freaking annoy–”

She didn’t get to finish because she was kissed. She willed her body to resist, to fight back. It was a hollow, ingenuine wish. Her body was honest, melting into those soft, memorable lips. Into her. Her luxurious scent, close again. Her insistent presence. Her body within touching distance, and Yoonji raised her hands, wanting yet reluctant.

The kiss broke into a whisper.

“You brought this because of me, right?” that silken voice purred.

Yoonji viewed those burning eyes through lashes.

“Yeah.”

Her taste lingering on her lips.

“I want you to take it off because of me too.”

Part of her wanted to say fuck off or that would never work on me or anything that deferred to common sense. The other part of her wanted to have a cleverer comeback than that. But the part of Yoonji that mattered detected the lens that being held up to her with those words. This was bait. The longer she stared into those glowing coals, the clearer their intention became. Someone who had been burned before. Someone who expected to be disappointed. Someone who expected dishonesty.

She hated to disappoint, but.

Yoonji just couldn’t bring herself to be scared anymore.

The horny had finally won out over the fear.

Her fingers grasped the bottom of the sweater that she had bought because of the woman in front of her. She pulled it up and over her head. Cool air rushed over her hot skin, making her shiver. Yoonji caught a glimpse of her stunned expression. She didn’t hide, but unease and embarrassment were creeping in, even with the sweatpants still on, since now they had seen everything now in some form or another. Yoonji would be lying if she said she was wholly confident. She had always been on the slender side. Pale, willowy. It didn’t matter. This nervousness had less to do with her actual appearance and more to do with the racing thud-thud-thud of her heart, so she reached up, took the other woman’s face in her hands, and kissed her again.

The taste of her lips erased all doubts.

It was as if time stopped. Like the world shifted. Like nothing else mattered except those lips, that tongue, those hands skimming over her elbows, and Yoonji brought them chest to chest, gasping at the supple softness. The sensation of her hard nipples against skin, but also her curves on hers. Gentle sensitive pressure tingled throughout her nerves, blissful, and she felt hands slide over her back, fingernails dancing down her spine, and before Yoonji could question herself, she murmured, “Scratch me.”

She did.

Pain blended with paradise. Yoonji gasped, her hands on the other woman’s shoulders, harder, shuddering, closing her eyes to imagine the imagery of those glistening red nails sinking into her skin, dragging down, leaving lines of flaring pink behind. Over. And over. Crisscrossing. Aching. It hurt in the best way possible. It made the moment real. The sensation of stinging pain solidified the intensity of her desire. Her want was worthy and responded to in kind, and so Yoonji leaned in and caught that talented tongue, sucking on it, mixing saliva with saliva.

The hands clawed down, sliding into her sweatpants.

A deep moan vibrated in her throat, letting go as she felt the waistband being pushed down, nails scraping over her ass, squeezing it, spreading it.

“Look at me.”

The only thing making her hesitate just a little was the constant jolt in her chest every time they locked eyes. The world fell into place. Two pieces of a puzzle that fit together perfectly even though Yoonji wasn’t sure what the completed image was supposed to be yet. It was illogical. Irrational. Past the physical. Past the mind games that weren’t really mind games at all. She could die in these arms right now and be happy with that.

A wry smile.

The temptress shifted her gaze, and Yoonji’s head turned too, confused, forgetting she wasn’t alone, and there was Jungkook. Seated on the edge of the bed, looking back at them with big eyes and an open mouth.

At least he had the decency to still hold onto his balled-up pants.

It didn’t hide his massive erection, but it was the thought that counted.

“Uh…”

“Having fun?”

Yoonji frowned, nestling deeper into the embrace. “Don’t objectify us.”

His cheeks flushed pink. “Well, you are objectively hot, noona.”

“Y… You…” Hot blood rushed to her ears.

“He’s not wrong, you know.”

Now Yoonji wanted to look at neither of them. “Fuck you.”

That husky voice chuckled darkly.

“The sooner, the better. Please.”

-

“Do you want to touch him?”

“No.”

“Why?”

“I want to touch you right now. Call it obsession.”

She tried to come off calm and collected. The other woman could see the forest beyond the trees. Yoonji thought that she would be called out. Instead, the response was, good, I wasn’t ready to give him up to you yet, and she was removed from the scrutiny of those dark, knowing eyes. Between kisses, Jungkook was saying something, but Yoonji was preoccupied with the graceful back presented to her, letting the other two be entangled with each other for the moment.

Her fingertips touched that smooth skin.

Traced the shoulder blades of the other woman. Remembered her touch, soft and insistent. Yoonji had calluses from her fingers, both from working on and playing guitars. She wondered how that felt for someone unaccustomed to such roughness. Then again, her partner-in-crime was workout junkie Jungkook. Maybe she has a preference for roughness. Her fingertips drifted down her spine, bending down to trail kisses after, listening to the feminine body under her. The tremble. The soft gasps. The vibration of pleasure under her lips heavenly, delicious, pressing her tongue flat against skin and licking upwards.

Her head turned as Yoonji rose, and lips met lips, traces of Jungkook still lingering to her tongue.

“Damn, that’s fucking hot.”

Yoonji cracked open an eye to glare at him, who simply gave her an am-I-wrong shrug.

No, he wasn’t.

Watching her give him head was fascinating.

Even without Jungkook’s yelp and subsequent whining, she could tell she was witnessing a master at oral. No hands, only tongue, and a flexible one at that, licking around his balls with his cock fully buried into her throat. Yoonji was pretty damn confident of her own tongue technology, but sadly she was out of practice. She doubted she could do swallow that fast and that deep without warming up at the very least.

She didn’t mean to stare.

Then again, this was happening above her head so she basically had a front-row seat.

Jungkook was kneeling on the bed, one hand clutching the headboard, his hard cock lost in the depths of an impossible mouth. Fuck, she even made it look sexy. It wasn’t sloppy or uncontrolled. Swift, constant, and the same depth every time. Yoonji heard Jungkook ask if her needed to be lower and she wondered how his lover was supposed to respond with a mouthful of dick.

One of the woman’s hands on the bed moved and tapped the inside of his knee, making him spread them further apart.

Well, evidently, they had their own language for that.

Yoonji slid down a little more, staring from more set of lips to the other.

Wet, sweet-smelling, divine.

An inkling of self-loathing nagged at her that she should have learned to hate it. She did not. She reached up, tracing, admiring the shape and shiver of another woman’s pussy. Clean-shaven. Not necessary, yet she appreciated the unconcealed beauty. She ran her fingertip over the slightly puffy lips, probably due to arousal. Impossibly supple, silky skin. Foreign but familiar. Yoonji realized she had never seen another woman from this angle. Not in real life, anyway. Excitement bubbled in her chest. She slipped a finger inside, enveloping herself in the quiver of those silky walls, feeling them tighten around her. The scent was heavier now, stronger, and Yoonji realized it wasn’t really what she was looking at that was turning her on so much.

It was who.

She placed her hand on the other woman’s thigh. Nudged her hips down, angling them toward her mouth, and drank.

Damn, she was thirsty.

The viscous juices stuck to her lips, her tongue, the heady taste flooding her mouth, and for a moment she only licked, shoving her tongue inside the wet heat, fuck, so good, how does she taste so good, heavy and rich and addictive, suffocating herself with the soft thighs around her head. Yoonji had tasted herself before, experimentally, and she hadn’t thought much of it. Her own taste was rather mild, she had thought. This was different. There was a sweetness, yes. Musk, perhaps, but more than that. Her arousal covered her tongue like syrup, and Yoonji had the compulsive urge to smother herself, paint herself with it, drown in her.

Yoonji heard Jungkook groan and she wanted to say, same.

She tilted her head and ran her tongue upwards, circling.

She did not expect to find what she was looking for in her first try. She didn’t. That was okay though; they shared the same anatomy thankfully, and Yoonji did know that she herself enjoyed exploring tongue. She listened for the hitch in breath and, with slight coaxing, she was rewarded with tense thighs under her fingers and a vibrating hum above her head. She felt the dip and pressure on her tongue, concentrating at that precise spot and closing her lips around it.

And she pleasured her.

Admittedly, this was probably affecting her more than her partner. Yoonji hoped that she could forgive and realize that she had no idea what the hell she was doing. What she knew was from her own experience only – constant pressure, not too aggressive, and no straying from the pace. Still, it was impossible to ignore the decadent slick on her chin, the weight of another on top, the forceful thrust as those hips bucked and pressed her head into the mattress, mounting her face a bit more firmly, and Yoonji couldn’t help but moan in her throat, feeling messy and dominated and wanting more, more, digging her fingers of one hand into the soft curve of that perfect ass.

Her other hand snaked down her stomach.

She couldn’t stop.

Diving between her legs, stroking herself, leaking wetness and collecting it on two fingers to stimulate herself more as she ate another pussy out, rubbing her tongue against that pulsing clit, straining her jaw to keep the suction. It was hard to breathe but she didn’t care. Tightness blossomed over her chest, her upper thighs, her neck, straining, closer, adrenaline overtaking, so close to the end, so close. If Yoonji had more of her senses, she would have relished in Jungkook moaning loudly in astonishment and begging for mercy. All she could hear was the roar of her own heartbeat in her ears and the delicate but inevitable cracking of her resolve getting thinner and thinner, harshly rubbing her swollen, throbbing clit as her tongue worked on another.

“Ah, fuck!”

This she did hear shattering through her reverie and then she felt a hand grip the crown of her head, those hips freezing in place, and then hot, gushing spasms under her lips, onto her chin, shaking and spilling, heaving flinches of pleasure radiating through her. Cutting off her air. Her eyes rolled back in her head and Yoonji came, her lower body locked, clamping a hand over her trembling pussy, her juices seeping through her fingers, containing the excruciating heat and aching pleasure with pressure, sending the turbulent waves up her torso and into her head in low, expansive shudders.

The orgasm made her feel like she was floating on electrified, sensual air.

It has never felt like this.

Not the high.

The attraction.

Fuck.

-

Yoonji woke up to shirtless Jeon Jungkook face down in her bed.

Snoring away his problems. Absolutely rawdogging it without a pillow. Someone who didn’t know him would be appalled at his complete disregard for neck support. Or maybe scream at his naked presence altogether. Occasionally she had shared a bed with Hoseok and once with Seokjin; both enjoyed the habitual ritual of matching pajamas. Yoonji had never shared a bed with Jungkook before, but she had heard enough from Jimin and Taehyung about his sleeping habits so she wasn’t surprised at his current state. His head was a mop of black hair. His muscular back rose and fell. Well, he was alive. Somehow the covers had migrated around his waist, which explained why Yoonji was freezing her tits off.

She just sighed and begrudgingly sat up.

Then realized she, too, was naked.

Oh, yeah.

For a brief moment she wished she had been drunk enough to forget everything that happened last night. Not even close. The memories played back in jarring flashes and splashes of sensation. She didn’t deny them, but if she didn’t get out of bed right now there would probably be (wet) consequences. As if her sheets hadn’t seen enough. She needed to do laundry.

But, first.

There was someone missing.

Yoonji tried not to feel disappointed. It was pretty damn difficult. She looked down, seeing clothes scattered all over the floor. She noted right away that the dark red slip dress and black bomber jacket were still here. That relieved her a bit, although Yoonji did not think for long why that was so. Instead, she went to her dresser and yanked out an oversized beige sweatshirt, pulling it over her head to warm up a bit.

She heard the sound of running water from her bathroom.

To say hope leapt to her throat was an understatement.

I don’t care, I swear.

She filed that thought away in the mental compartment of and-other-lies-I-tell-myself and quietly made her way to the bathroom, stepping over the clothes absentmindedly. Jungkook was not going to wake up unless he wanted to or if a bomb went off. Even then, hard to say. She felt a little bad leaving him behind, yet the idea of being alone with her, if only for a few moments, if only…

The bathroom door was slightly ajar.

She saw a sliver of someone in the mirror, bending down. The splash of water sang in her ears. Yoonji lightly touched the door with her fingertips and softly called out her name.

A shiver went up her spine as she did so.

“Hm?”

She heard the unceremonious sound of spitting and the door opened wider to a sleepy face and throaty mumble.

“Ah, Yoonji. I had to rinse out my mouth to save you from trauma.”

She couldn’t reply for a moment. Is it to fair for someone to look so beautiful in the morning? She didn’t look that different from last night – obviously, Yoonji, she hadn’t been wearing any makeup, stop being an idiot – but her lips were now deep mauvy-pink. Glossy. A single water droplet clung to her full lower lip. She was wearing Jungkook’s black hoodie, swamped in the fabric, with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows. It still smelled like him, that clean laundry scent persisting amidst sultry, feminine perfume. Her hair was messy from sleep. She frowned and ran a hand through it, using the dampness of her palm to straighten it out a bit.

“Trauma?” Yoonji echoed, not listening.

The devil’s smile reappeared. “Dental hygiene is important.”

She felt her cheeks flush, realizing she should keep her mouth pointed away. “I have spares. Here, let me get a toothbrush for you,” she mumbled, embarrassment rising as she noticed her voice was croaky from sleep.

The other woman stepped aside to move out of the way, calling after her back. “It’s fine. I can just go home.”

But Yoonji was already kneeling, rifling through the bottom cabinet. She found a white toothbrush, still sealed in the plastic case over the bristles, and shot up quickly, holding it out to a stunned face. Those eyes darted from the outstretched offering to Yoonji’s expression.

That gaze softened to a kindling burn.

“Ah… You don’t need to.”

Yoonji poked the air with the toothbrush, glaring stubbornly.

They stared either other down. Proximity close, and yet Yoonji could sense the distance in those scorched eyes. Lashes lowering. Expression undefined. It was only an item, and they both knew what it meant if she accepted it.

She gave Yoonji a gentle final warning.

“A toothbrush is for a repeat offender, you know,” that husky voice reminded her.

For a moment, silence.

Then Yoonji narrowed her eyes and grabbed the woman’s hand with her free one, shoving the white toothbrush into her open palm. Closing those long fingers around it while her heart thudded like a relentless bass beat, so hard it threatened to swallow her chest, and then she immediately het go and turned around, grabbing her own black toothbrush.

“Just brush your fuckin’ teeth.”

Yoonji did not look up to see the reaction.

She couldn’t, busying herself with her routine, running the bristles under the water before jamming toothpaste onto them. Right into her mouth it went, furiously brushing without even once looking at the mirror. It was several, heart wrenching seconds of panic.

And then.

She felt a presence lean in beside her.

“I can borrow this, right?”

A hand with red-and-orange glistening fingernails gestured to the toothpaste. Yoonji nodded gruffly and handed it over, backing away to give access to the sink. For several minutes, they stood there in silence, not looking at each other, brushing away. That was only mildly a lie, because Yoonji did look over to see the other woman staring at the wall, or her white towels, or probably nothing at all. She seemed deep in thought. Yoonji had to bend over to rinse out her mouth first.

She made sure to wipe the lip of the plastic cup she used before handing it over.

A surprised eyebrow raised.

Yoonji cocked one back. “Your face was literally between my legs. We can share a damn cup.”

She saw her stifle a laugh and concede.

It was a little awkward, standing there as another finished her routine, but Yoonji didn’t want to leave yet. She wanted to feel that warmth of her presence a little longer. She saw that the hem of the hoodie skimmed her upper thighs and raised slightly when she bent over the sink. Not that Yoonji was looking at that magnificent ass. Oops. Yet she felt a faint twinge of envy seeing those curves. She was proud of her slender legs, yet sometimes she was jealous of women with more shapely thighs and calves. Curves were an unmistakable, prominent sexiness. Her own slim body type sometimes made Yoonji feel more like a pretty girl rather than a commanding feminine presence. She took the moment to appreciate and admire though. I got to touch her. Hold her. Be with her, if only for one night. It was a good chance to turn comparison into a silver lining.

The sound of water was no longer present.

She felt that prickling sensation when she knew someone is looking at her.

Yoonji looked up.

Jungkook’s girlfriend was watching at her with amusement.

Oh, shit, I’m as bad as he is.

And then the distance was gone and her air was replaced with minty breath. Soft lips, pressing to hers.

And, like Jungkook, Yoonji melted with one kiss.

It’s only a kiss, silly.

The heat drew away and she drew a breath, trying not to shudder. Had to open her eyes, bewildered that she had closed them. They glanced at each other. Then didn’t. The morning-after air felt a little different. More delicate. Strangers that knew how the other tasted. Yoonji looked back to her. She was absentmindedly flicking water off the toothbrush head.

“What?”

Those scorched eyes returned to her. A pause.

Then a faraway smile.

“It’s nothing.”

“Tell me,” Yoonji insisted.

Something in that expression. Familiar but unknown. She couldn’t shake the feeling of déjà vu and jamais vu all at once. It was subtle. She watched a mental battle play out in the silence, then a not-so smile appeared. One that Yoonji knew well.

She had formed it herself numerous times.

“I think my younger self would be shocked to know what psycho shit I’m doing right now,” her maybe-please-let-it-be lover mused. “Shocked that I’m even still alive.”

Yoonji stared at her and understood.

She had mentioned it to the others before when they had been going through hard times, but never delved into it. It was a depressing topic of conversation, after all. The only person who really knew how dark her thoughts had become at one point was her best friend, Jung Hoseok. He truly listened to anything she said without judgement. Hoseok had convinced her to go and speak to a professional about it. She hadn’t wanted to, said she was over it, said she didn’t think like that anymore, even thought that such discussions couldn’t help, but once again Hoseok was right. She hadn’t processed those internal demons as well as she thought. Now, she was able to speak more calmly about it.

“Mine, too,” Yoonji admitted quietly.

A half-smile, but this time directed at her.

“I didn’t want us to have that in common.”

Yoonji shrugged. “Despite my best efforts, I’m a sensitive bitch.”

A small laugh that came from her chest. Yoonji found she very much enjoyed hearing it. Get a grip. The source of her stomach flutters tilted her head.

“Was it them or was it you?”

She thought back to those therapy sessions years ago. “Me. Me feeling unworthy, never enough. Me feeling like I was falling into the abyss. Me thinking I needed to be someone to somebody,” she muttered, shaking her head. “I hated being around people. I hated being alone more. It didn’t matter, because I was always alone when surrounded by people. It got so bad that I couldn’t be around others without feeling like I was suffocating. I never wanted anyone to see the real me. She is not nice, not ladylike, and she could not fit nicely into the boxes society placed down for her. I thought she… No, I thought I was a burden. I thought I didn’t need to be here.” She glanced up, expecting pity.

The other woman simply nodded, listening.

Truthfully, Yoonji appreciated that. She continued. “I had a friend in university who was really into music. He needed someone to help him play piano. Someone in the music department gave him my name. I didn’t think too much about it. I was still determined to stay closed off. But, somehow, through him…” I met them all through Namjoon. First Hoseok. Then Jimin. Seokjin. Taehyung. Jungkook. “I don’t think I considered them friends back then, but that was who they were. And then I realized that, even if I think I’m not that great, maybe I should try to be for people who care about me, even if I think it’s misguided. They chose to stand by me. I should at least do the same. Life is too short to not try.”

“Hmmmm.” This little miscreant had the audacity to smirk. “You are a sensitive bitch.”

Yoonji scowled and redirected the question. “What about you?”

That gaze darkened.

“Them.”

A light scoff and then a sigh.

“Being a successful daughter was the purpose of my birth. I wasn’t a son, after all. Had to make up for that. I think I was told that over a million times. If not, I was told I could be replaced,” she added with a morbid chuckle. “My worth depended on what achievements I could obtain. At the expense of others, of myself, it didn’t matter. There were consequences if I couldn’t claw my way to the top, so I did. Top of my class. Pretty meant thin until I was skin and bones. Dead on the inside so everyone could fill me with their expectations. I wanted to end it. Just so I could have something, anything, that could only be my own.” She straightened, cracking her neck with an exhale. “Got so close and then…” Shrugged, shaking her head. “I was just a teenager. I figured, well, at the very least I should become an adult. Then I could legally drink soju. Can you believe I still cared that much about rules?” She really laughed then, placing a hand over her mouth. “Turns out soju is disgusting. I chose sex as my drug of choice. You can at least force people to take a shower.”

“You probably haven’t had good soju,” Yoonji pointed out.

“True. Even so, I didn’t like how I felt. Buzzed and out of control.”

Made sense. Yoonji peered into the depths of that gaze but didn’t find any embarrassment. I am not gonna die boring. She wondered when it changed. She didn’t have to ask. Like a mind reader, that sly smile caught on.

“I picked a year in the future. Reevaluate then, if you will,” she said, implying the worst. “And I lived that year. It was awful. Went broke, got myself into a love triangle that collapsed on all sides, slept surrounded by cockroaches. Fat ones, too. Was this close,” she snickered, nearly tapping her fingertips together. “To being homeless on top of it. But, I didn’t do it.”

“Why?”

She paused as if to contemplate. “Why…? Because I put myself in those situations. Because I made those poor decisions, and I saw those consequences as a gift. Because they are.” Those burning eyes considered her for a moment. “We all live for control that we will never have. Some people don’t think about it. Some people choose to give up. Some people choose to feel in control by manipulating others. And some people, like me, choose to be utter batshit crazy to save my own sanity.”

This time Yoonji laughed herself. “Gotta go insane to stay sane.”

The other woman joined in, ticking her chin in her direction.

“Put that on a t-shirt so I can wear it.”

The mirth died down. Her lack of fear and calculated impulsivity became clear now. Shit, that’s what hooked Jungkook, huh? But Yoonji could understand. Hot, wise, great sense of style. Wicked good at sex with a killer smirk. This was someone that didn’t want to be anyone else. He loved that shit. And I guess that means me too. Fuck.

“When did you know that you weren’t part of the heteronormative cult?”

The question broke Yoonji out of her thoughts. “Uh…” She was honest. “I think I always knew. I never thought I was off until high school, when relationships started getting dramatic. When others were judged for who they liked. When we were asked to judge others for who they liked. I realized I was different. I had never accepted gender being two vastly different groups of people. Everyone is just…”

“People.”

“Yeah.” That and she had felt that she was equally curious about all bodies. “I also think there’s lots of arbitrary traits that can be used to define male or female. None of them are as important to me as integrity. Anyone can live with integrity no matter who they are or how they define themselves.”

“Ooooh. Clever little cat you are.”

Yoonji felt a muscle in her temple twitch. “And you?”

The deviant leaned against the doorframe and playfully shrugged. “I always knew. A body is just a body.”

Well, that was chilling.

Those scorched eyes returned.

Yoonji frowned, then asked, “Why Jungkook?”

Those full lips parted and her expression softened. She smiled to her frown.

“Because he proved to me that a body is more than just a body.”

Silence.

God, Jungkook is a dumbass.

“Noona?”

They both turned to face the hallway at the same time.

A sleepy, yawning form was making his way down the hallway, thankfully wearing his pants. Barely, though. The waistband rested on the v-line of his hips. Jungkook scratched his head, blinking hard, still shirtless and red-cheeked from passing out on his face. He stretched, making all of the muscles in his chest become defined with his effort.

“Oh, you have my hoodie. No wonder I couldn’t find it.”

“You don’t need it,” was the cheerful response.

Jungkook pouted and spotted her. “Oh, hey, Yoonji-noona. Do you still have my toothbrush from last time?”

She clicked her tongue. “Mhm, stinky breath.”

“Argh, I’m trying to fix that,” he protested, barging into the already crowded bathroom.

Yoonji was already opening the medicine cabinet and taking down the purple toothbrush from the top shelf, pushing away all the other four brushes lying beside it. Blue, pink, green, yellow. There used to be five, but she didn’t expect Hoseok to stay over anytime soon. Keeping one for over a year and a half was just gross. His usual color was red. Since Yoonji’s apartment was close to a main train station, various members of the group often stayed over to sleep before heading over to wherever they needed to go. She had been asked too many times if she had a spare, thus her current system.

Men were forgetful, sigh.

“Here, dummy.”

He took the purple toothbrush out of the plastic case and ruffled her hair annoyingly. “Thanks, Yoonji-ah.”

She smacked his hand and then froze.

Jungkook froze too, realizing what he had done.

He used to do vexing things like that all the time, but not lately. And then he did it now, without thinking. He actually dropped the honorifics a long time ago, often speaking to her informally before, and Yoonji had noticed how they had reappeared again. She hadn’t cared about the lack of formality, nor grasped the distance the return of it had created. With the appearance of his new female companion, she had concluded that it made sense, of course, for him to distance himself from his female friend.

And.

Yoonji now realized how sad she had been without his constant minor annoyances.

She smacked his hand again and frowned.

Jungkook looked offended. Their girlfriend laughed.

“Brush your teeth, you delinquent. I’m going to order breakfast.”

And Yoonji squeezed herself out of there, running off to find her phone.

-

ep 7. let's be happy together. sugar, spice, and everything nice

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min yoonji masterpost | masterpost