#what is their reasoning??

[lyinginthesnow]

What makes me lose my mind a bit about Season 2 Kendall is that like— Logan is trying to fully break his will and control him, and Kendall is trying to break his own will in a lot of ways through guilt and self-destructive behaviours, but there’s this tiny stubborn part of him, this desire for self-preservation, that they can’t kill no matter how hard they try. There’s this little instinctual, human voice inside him saying no, I want to live, I want to fight back, I don’t want to be his puppet, I don’t want to drown. Like initially he wants to save Vaulter, and oppose Logan on buying Pierce. Each time he goes up to the roof in “Safe Room”, he comes back down. He confronts Logan when Logan’s getting too cozy with Rhea in “Return”. He seeks out some form of happiness with Naomi (obviously that is self-destructive too given that he knows her presence will enable his drug abuse, but he also does seek connection and joy out of their relationship). But every time this desire to care about himself and fight back rears its head, either he or Logan smothers it. He submits to Logan’s orders regarding Vaulter (“because my dad told me to”) and Pierce. He goes back up onto the roof multiple times. After the confrontation about Rhea, Logan takes him to the waiter’s house, reminding him of his guilt and powerlessness. Seeing that Kendall finds escape in his relationship with Naomi, Logan sends her off the yacht.

So when Logan tells Kendall he is going to be sacrificed in “This Is Not for Tears”, Kendall has reached a point where he obeys without a single protest. “I deserve it. Maybe I deserve it”. But — crucially — Logan disagrees, saying that Kendall has nothing to be guilty about regarding the waiter’s death. Logan’s lines here are really important, because (in my interpretation??) they ignite Kendall’s repressed urge to fight back that has been slowly eroded this entire season, which leads to his decision at the end of the episode. If Logan had responded “yes, you do deserve it”, then Kendall would have walked to his own destruction willingly, giving up, maybe even feeling a sense of righteousness that he was being punished. But Logan doesn’t say that. Instead, he says: “Nah, nah. Not that. NRPI. You’re the best. Don’t beat yourself up. No real person involved. You know, it’s… it’s nothing.“ It’s nothing.

I think Kendall has a realization in this moment which is very similar to the one Rhea has in “DC”, when she says to Logan, “I can’t see the bottom of the pool. I don’t know if you care about anything. And that scares me”. Kendall’s conscience has been eating him up from the inside — but Logan doesn’t have it. He just doesn’t care. The waiter’s death has been weighing on Kendall as the basis for his self-destructiveness (and submission to Logan’s control), but Logan dismisses it so flippantly, almost as if it is irrelevant, since the moral value of that event is currently not related to his own self-interest in using Kendall as a tool. Which is all this ever was. To Logan, it was never about the waiter. It was never some form of “deserved” punishment. It was always just a part of Logan’s game, convenient to him, serving his aims.

So that tiny stubborn part of Kendall comes to life a bit inside him. It says no, no I don’t want to lie down and let you do this to me. I’m not sure he listens to it right away. But it’s there, and it grows bit by bit. No I want to live, no I want to escape, no I want to fight back, no my father is a malignant presence, a bully, and a liar, and this is the day his reign ends

[eosofspades]

i didn't have "i'm broken" teenage asexual angst i had "i'm literally being the only reasonable one about this concept and the rest of you are behaving like fucking freaks" perception issues

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

the fact that shakespeare was a playwright is sometimes so funny to me. just the concept of the "greatest writer of the English language" being a random 450-year-old entertainer, a 16th cent pop cultural sensation (thanks in large part to puns & dirty jokes & verbiage & a long-running appeal to commoners). and his work was made to be watched not read, but in the classroom teachers just hand us his scripts and say "that's literature"

just...imagine it's 2450 A.D. and English Lit students are regularly going into 100k debt writing postdoc theses on The Simpsons screenplays. the original animation hasn't even been preserved, it's literally just scripts and the occasional SDH subtitles.txt. they've been republished more times than the Bible

[themthistles]

whenever i see another tiktok girlie talking about how she wishes to have been a fangirl in 2010s i feel like a seasoned veteran overhearing a foolish youngin boasting about wanting to go to war for glory and adventure. you naive little idiot. you know nothing. you understand nothing. you weren't there in the trenches. i have seen things, terrible things. i cannot plug in my phone charger at night without being plagued by the visions of Him

[cozymodeonpoint]

senshi fans: learning how to make nutritious meals for themselves

laios fans: down bad

marcille fans: lesbianism

chilchuck fans: putting that man in situations

[mickedy]

Does anyone remember the internet when MLP first got popular and people online were insisting They were swearing up and down that the show was for adults, and that it was marketed towards kids but was Definitely For adults, full of mature humor and dark concepts and deep complex characters. and then nowadays you go look up an episode of MLP: FiM and the episode synopsis is something like Pinkie Pie Lost Her Balloon 🎈💔

[syruubi]

The Hydro Sovereign comes to Mondstadt

[thetimelordbatgirl]

Imagine actually being so evil that you'd rather make sure your writers suffer financially instead of just paying them the pay they deserve. Hell truly has some seats reserved already, holy shit.

[rythyme]

if you've been to more than one, pick the one that's further down on the list. stopovers don't count unless you actually left the airport.

feel free to say how many / which ones you've been to in the tags!

[hrokkall]

"Sad Cat Poem" by Spencer Madsen

[floccinaucinihilipilificationa]

[clown-owo]

been replaying the Portal series I think this is where its heading

[madscientistenthusiast]

Personally I think that Azula should have been redeemed simply so that she can become Zuko's horrible little advisor who whispers evil little plans to him so that he can do the exact opposite

[tesb]

Happy Star Wars day! May the Force be with you! @swsource Star Wars Week: Day 6

[tiktaalic]

one of my beloved friends (very autism) was in.. not denial but ignorance sounds mean. but that abt themself last time you brought up the raads r test so i sent it to the gc (full of autism) and they were like psh. fake test no one could get below 100. they know now but i think about it so much

The thing is. When you take the autism test. And you see your score is in the 100 to 160 range. You think. Oh this is probably the middle? Middle autism. Tinge of autism. Your relatives calling you bright but shy autism. Just a whiff of autism. And then you see the score ranges. And you go. This test is lying to me there is absolutely no way the majority of people score under 65. The 65 number is such a low cutoff and so many of these experiences are clearly universal a score under 65 is something they made up in a lab. People who score under 65 are obviously scoring just under that mark from 59 to 64 and they’re also obviously lying or purposely misrepresenting their experiences as less severe than they are. And then you find out there are real people who get a 20 or 30 or 7 on it. And you go. Ah

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

going through my old journals as part of therapy homework and i'm reading a section written in the emotional wreckage of a full-on breakdown when i get hit with this line:

There is never a satisfying answer to ‘Why didn’t they love me?’

like wow babe. good fucking point