#which i get but also they just did a thing today about their experience w miscarriage so

[indigodawns]

.

[nyctarian]

janela cut a post show promo just to put over ibushi and at one point was like "you didnt go to wwe and, you didn /for now/ go to aew, you came to this company i would die for" and he gave ibushi the proper respect he deserved and did genuinely thank aew for what it was even if towards the end it did not work out for him. so even tho i dont like him i at least appreciate that he genuinely understood what it meant for ibushi to be there and for gcw to get him first

[squareanon]

.

[l-cereta]

-

[sleepynoons]

jing yuan x f!reader, nsfw, 18+, not beta read

cw: nudity, suggestive content

notes: pls lmk if i'm missing any tags or warnings. anyway, nothing explicit this time, experimenting more w/ pieces that heavily focus on sexual tension + build-up. anyway x2, not sure how to describe the setting of this piece. still uses some hrs concepts like aeons. jing yuan is rich, the reader is his maid, and both use more formal language. this was a fun exercise!

THERE ARE a lot of rumors surrounding your master. you hear them when you go grocery shopping, visit the tailor, pick up the dry cleaning, drop off lunches at the front desk on days that he’s busy. some of them are about you – who are you? his wife? mistress? there’s no way you’re just a friend, right?

you’re trained to maintain a stoic facade, but inside, you can’t help but be entertained. you are none of those things, and one can only dream of sharing such a bond with him. you’re content with simply being his maid – you mustn’t tread closer.

on a wooden tray, you neatly arrange a cup of chamomile tea, another cup of warm, honeyed milk, and a folded newspaper of today’s news. before you leave the kitchen, though, you make sure to drop a few treats into a feeding bowl and rub at mimi’s stomach, your master’s beloved dog.

“your father needs some time alone,” you say to the animal. seemingly able to understand your words, mimi’s ears droop at a slight angle and she licks at your fingertips, seeking consolation. “he’ll be out soon, i promise.”

you get back up, wash your hands, and pick up the tray, heading over to your master’s bathroom.

from the hallway, you can hear the sound of water splashing and sloshing. if you strain a bit more, you can arguably make out some humming, nonsensical and haphazard in melody. when you reach the door, you hear submerging, and you know you’re right on time.

you knock on the door twice. “master, may i come in?”

you hear a faint noise of affirmation, no doubt muffled by the wall, and carefully enter without spilling the contents of the tray.

you’re greeted with a dazzling smile and glimmering droplets of soap and water slipping down naked skin.

your master greets you, fine smile lines outlining his rosy lips and delicate nose. “how many times have i told you that just my name will suffice?”

“master jing yuan,” you say as you place his drinks and paper on a designated drawer beside the tub, “how many times have i told you that you shouldn’t ask me to join you when you’re in the bathroom?”

“but who else can help me with my unruly mane of silver?” he pouts, tone feigning innocence.

“your hair isn’t unruly.”

“did you not call it that last time?”

you click your tongue. your master chuckles and turns away from you to face the other end of the tub. you grab a stool, hand him his newspaper, and take your place behind him. with a brush in hand, you unravel the red ribbon tying his hair and, with quick, gentle strokes, run the brush through the thick layers. you didn’t mean to call his hair unruly before, but you think there’s quite a bit of truth to it anyway. you also note that his hair has gotten quite long.

“master jing yuan, perhaps it’s time for a trim?” you suggest.

your master hums and leans back so that your hands can reach the crown of his head. “you are right. i shall leave it to you, then?”

shaking your head, you respond, “you really ought to get it done at a professional salon. i can only do so much.”

“you are a woman of many talents. i am sure you will do just fine,” he reassures. you huff in protest.

as your master’s only taking a soak today, you plait his hair into a thick braid before tying it up into a bun. you hand him his cup of tea, which is no longer scalding, and stand up to leave.

“oh!” he suddenly exclaims. “i seem to have forgotten my bathrobe.” he looks up at you expectantly, and you nod in understanding.

“i’ll go grab it. i’ll be right back.” you bow quickly before closing the door behind you on the way out and heading towards the laundry room.

you take your time. really, you needed an excuse to leave the bathroom. you’re glad that your master’s such a big fan of bath bombs, or else you’d see everything… you pat harshly at your warm cheeks to break free from your reverie. don’t tread any closer. you’re behaving like a schoolgirl experiencing her first love, and you can only groan internally at yourself. but you can’t blame yourself either – anyone would fall in love with your master if they know him the way you do. he’s so irresistible, and having been his maid for so long has only enabled you to witness more of his charisma and charm. you sigh, sitting on the floor in front of the dryer as you wait for it to de-wrinkle your master’s robe.

you return ten minutes later, both for your own wellbeing and to also give your master some time to himself.

“master jing yuan, i’m back. may i come in?”

instead of a reply, though, the door cracks open, and your master, wearing nothing but a towel tied loosely around his hips, appears before you. you yelp and rush to cover your eyes. he simply laughs at your antics before grabbing you by the arm and leading you into the bathroom.

“what – what are you –“

“i hurt my arm today, so i will need your help putting my robe on. it is quite heavy, after all.”

you don’t know where to look. you certainly can’t look at the bathroom mirror that covers the top-half of one wall or the marble on the other that shines and reflects so clearly. you opt to close your eyes and hold the robe up by the collar.

“this is hardly appropriate,” you mutter, embarrassment and nervousness coloring your tone. as a result, you try to distract yourself with another subject. “besides, couldn’t you have told me earlier? i would’ve prepared something in advance had i known.”

“i just noticed the bruise as well. seems i was a little careless today.” he then chuckles – at himself or you, you’re not sure.

you remark, “you? careless? that hardly goes together.”

your master lets you know that he’s put on his sleeves, so you step away, eyes still closed. 

immediately, he hums with obvious disapproval. “hm? why are you backing away?”

you sputter, “m-master jing yuan, i should not be here! if you could just – i don’t know – turn around or something, i can –“

“i have turned around.”

you sigh in relief, happy that he’s obedient for once. your master is often relentless in his teasing and tricks, and you’re grateful that he’s granting you mercy in this moment. so you open your eyes, ready to find your way to the door –

your master is standing dangerously close, so that you’re eye-to-eye with him. from this view, you can also see that his chest is barely covered, knot slowly slipping undone.

“master!” you gasp. the proximity, the surprise, the challenging look in his eyes – they’re all driving you mad.

he clears his throat. “jing yuan.”

“master jing yuan.”

“jing yuan.”

“oh, for aeons’ sake, jing yuan! you’re not wearing your robe properly!”

jing yuan gloats. he then says in a low, low whisper, “my hands have cramped up. can you do it for me instead?” he speaks directly into your ears, and you want to scream.

shaking, you stretch out your trembling hands and take the ends of the belt. you can feel jing yuan’s hot breaths fanning your cheek, and you can even smell the faint trace of lavender from the bath bomb. your fingers are too clumsy, though, and you fail multiple times in properly tying the belt. after a few more fruitless attempts, jing yuan reaches down, softly grabbing your hands, and gently guides them.

“and… like this,” he breathes. even when you’ve secured the knot, though, he doesn’t let go.

don’t tread any closer. “j-jing yuan,” you whimper. “please…”

his hands inch up, gliding from your palms to your forearms to your elbows. he does it so slowly, so seductively, so intentionally. he tugs you impossibly a little closer, and now you can feel the heat of his chest through your uniform. then, jing yuan rests his head on your shoulders, and his lips ghost the sensitive skin of your neck, causing you to shiver and shudder at the sensation. the two of you just stand there, him taking deep breaths, you holding yours.

finally, after a few minutes, jing yuan breaks the silence. “i can no longer employ you, my dearest.”

you feel faint. you’re never escaping the gossip now.

[heartsforseo]

Skincare with the strawhats

A/n: I'm somewhere on episode 500 in One Piece. And looking back at my valorant post... I really did Franky, Jimbei, Chopper, and Brook wrong. But uh... I'll try to do better :D!! Btw this excludes Chopper cuz...how?

⭑Luffy, I'd say wouldn't understand much about it. I mean, he probably knows and have heard a bit from Nami and Robin but that's that.

⭑When you first explained it to him, he was half-listening, so he was a bit shocked when you sprayed some water on his face.

⭑Would think of it as a fun game and splash some water onto you too (your clothes sadly got wet :[)

⭑When you start adding some cream onto his face he found it funny and started making weird faces.

⭑Over some time, he'd actually start liking it and would start expecting one every week (and maybe even every day)

⭑And even if you guys were to do skincare every day, he'd either fall asleep or cause some ruckus. No in-between.

"Hey, Y/n!! Can we do the skinmare thing again??"

"It's skincare, Luffy, and yes."

⭑Overall, 6/10. He's not the worst, but there is definitely better.

⭑It's either Nami who will bring it up or you.

⭑She's the best to do skincare with since she got everything. Like everything

⭑Would prolly make you pay when you use one of her stuff (w/h or w/o permission)

⭑Would actually give you a piece of advice on what or what not to do though.

⭑While doing skincare, Nami will tell you gossip about the crew or from the last island.

⭑If you get on her good side, she might give you one of her equipment.

⭑Would secretly charge you money for all the wrongdoings you did though. And an extra 10,000 berries because you asked her to do skin care.

"Alright Y/n. This session would be 96,000 berries."

⭑Overall, 9/10. Definitely one of the best. con= -1 because she charges after skincare. Pro= You guys will now have skincare every week.

"No."

⭑You have to convince Zoro numerous times (and maybe even guilt trip him) just so he'd say yes.

⭑He'd be embarrassed at first and try to stay quiet (he doesn't want the lovesick cook to see him with a headband on and foam on his face)

⭑He's blushing so hard from embarrassment so be nice to him. It's also a good opportunity to tease him.

⭑Although too much teasing would opt to make him leave. Unless you ask Sanji instead or tell the crew what was happening to Zoro, that would make him stay back and listen.

⭑While doing skincare, he'd let you take the lead (considering he doesn't even know anything about it) and would only let out some grumbles and whines.

⭑After skincare, he'd look himself in the mirror and touch his face, noticing how smooth it was.

⭑He'd then look after the skincare and would ask you about it for more. He won't say it again though, so you better have good ears because he'll be all muttering.

⭑Overall. 7/10, he's very quiet and wouldn't do much unless you say so.

⭑Sanji would beg for it every. single. day

⭑And you finally had enough and said yes.

⭑Now before entering the bathroom, you can already smell the rosy perfume outside.

⭑WOULD have everything and anything. Maybe even more than Nami's skincare collection.

⭑He'd know what type of face skin you have AND the type you use. So it was no surprise when your essentials were already out.

⭑He'd beg give you assistance 24/7 while doing skincare

⭑He'd also ask you if you're feeling uncomfortable, having fun, and would ramble on about some new recipes he's learned.

"I hope you had fun today Y/n. I'm looking forward to the next."

⭑Overall, 10/10. He knows what you need and what you like. He also think of your situation/feelings, and that itself makes it 10/10 already.

⭑Ussopp would fly over the moon when you asked him.

⭑He'd gladly accept it and tell you he had a lot of experience in skin care (which isn't technically a lie since he knew some of it from Kaya)

⭑But of course, he'd still be scared and shaking. What if you didn't like it? What if you don't wanna do skin care with him again?

⭑He'd be rather stiff at first. Scared to disappoint you.

⭑But minutes later he'd start to cool down and come back to his normal self.

⭑Now every time you both will have skincare time. He'd have a bunch of stories saved up only for you.

"Oh Y/n! I have another story for you later."

⭑Overall, 9/10. He's really fun to be with and is def one of the best to do skincare with.

⭑You'd have to ask Robin to join you

⭑She never really thought of doing skincare together unless you bring it up.

⭑And you really know when to pick out the dates since she was so stressed at first T~T)>

⭑Being around a chaotic and childish crew could really stack up stress.

⭑But a simple skincare could really help it get out.

⭑Robin really much appreciated what you did. Especially when you massage her face and shoulders.

⭑It isn't only one-sided. She'd help you out by giving some advice and ideas when she sees you frowning at your own face. Even giving out some compliments.

"This has really helped out my day, Y/n. Thank you very much."

⭑Overall, 9/10. Really nice to hang out with, and would crack a dark joke once in a while.

⭑Franky would definitely say yes and strike a pose.

⭑He'd know a lot of this from Mozu and Kiwi and would sometimes buy them the products that they wanted.

⭑And since he's basically the crew's shipwright, he had definitely tried to recreate the product the stores have.

⭑But wait. It felt itchy when you tried it? Don't worry, he made a new one already. One that you'll definitely find lovely.

⭑You don't like how he designed it? Don't worry, he made an even bigger one with a design you'll like.

⭑Brook is jumping in joy and is asking to see your panties.

⭑Until he realizes he's a skeleton.

"Yohohoho! I'm really exci--oh..."

⭑Overall, 7/10. He's good for emotional support...I guess?

⭑Lastly, our good man Jimbei.

⭑(I only saw Jimbei a few times due to Impel down and Marineford so uh...)

⭑I'd say that skincare never really crossed his mind. I mean he IS a fishman after all.

⭑But once you told him about it and how it can help you relax, he decided to take up the offer.

⭑He's probably embarrassed and just standing dumbfounded. What was he gonna do?

⭑But dw since you helped him </33

⭑AND OMG HE TIED UP HIS HAIR INTO A FULL BUN?!?!?!?!? AHHHHHH (I'm fangirling DD:...i'M SORRY JIMBEI WS SO COOL)

⭑But back to the story. I'd say he really enjoyed that. AND OF COURSE HUGS!!! HUGS ARE VERY MUCH NEEDED!!!

"Thank you for this, Y/n. I very much appreciated it."

⭑Overall, 7/10. He's pretty much quiet and doesn't know what to do. But the silence is really comforting.

A/n: AND OH MY I FINISHED IT!!! I STARTED ON THIS AT 2 PM AND NOW ITS 5 PM HUHU!! ENYWAYSSSS I HOPE YLL ENJOYED IT, LOVE YALL MWA

[0310s]

gently, by your side | jaehyun

members: myung jaehyun x gender neutral reader

genre: college au, angst, comfort, best friends! to ???, more platonic stuff in this one

tags/warnings: extensive discussions of mental health and chronic/mental illness, y/n is not okay. :(

summary: jaehyun finds you after a bad week.

wc: 2.7k

a/n: this fic’s title comes from this lovely song. as someone who’s struggled with both chronic and mental illness, it really takes someone strong and amazing to keep on going, despite everything. most of the dialogue in this comes from my own musings and experiences with mental health. i wrote this for a dear mutual of mine! i hope better days will come for you soon, whenever that may be. meanwhile, i hope this gives you comfort when things are tough! sending lots of love <3 

𓉞⋆｡˚☁︎｡⋆

5 days ago 1:28 PM 🐶 cutie puppy

(y/n) we haven’t seen each other in such a loooong time imy :(( i mean i KNOW it’s just been a couple of days since we last hung out but still!!!!!!! when are we seeing each other again !!!! tell me ur schedule QUICK !!!!

4 days ago 6:33 PM 🐶 cutie puppy

heeeeyyyyyyyyy (with the intention to hang out) heeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy heeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyy reply to meeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!! tell me when ur free pls i miss u :((

3 days ago 11:58 PM 🐶 cutie puppy

hey i didn’t see u at the party today i thought u said u were going last week!!!  also i asked around and people said they haven’t seen u around recently??? and they don’t know what ur up to

2 days ago 2:05 PM 🐶 cutie puppy

heeeyyyy ?????????? did i do smth?????  or are u just really busy w school and work idk either way pls just let me know :(( i won’t bother u if ur rlllyyy busy

10:35 PM sorry if i’m being annoying btw

Yesterday  11:32 PM 🐶 cutie puppy

ok i thought about it reaaaaaallly hard and i don’t think i’ve done anything to make u mad or upset w me??? well aside from that time last last week that u got mad at me for accidentally messing w ur computer and deleting ur work files WHICH IM LIKE REALLY SORRY FOR but i fixed it!!!!! i thought we were good alrd!!! are u still mad at me 4 that ?

1:00 AM (y/n)?

1:28 AM idk  i thought i was ur best friend :(( did smth change???

2:47 AM pls pls reply :(( i know we can talk this out i don’t want us to not be ok

Today  3:00 PM 🐶 cutie puppy i’m coming over.

𓉞⋆｡˚☁︎｡⋆

Sitting up from your bed, your heart thuds in anxiety as you quickly scroll through your chat history with Jaehyun. Your eyes hurt and your brain feels especially foggy, like you’re looking at the world through a particularly cloudy lens. How long did you sleep? The last thing you recall was working on your assignments last night, then choosing to sleep instead when you got overwhelmed. Even then, you slept fitfully. You remember setting an alarm at 9 AM today to continue working, but even as you sat at your desk, you couldn’t type a single sentence on your laptop. Everything felt muddled and it was as if you couldn’t understand anything at all. Even the cups of coffee you drank in desperation was of no use keeping you alert; all it did was make you palpitate.

Then you gave up, went back to bed, and you’re here now. Checking the chat timestamps, you realize you haven’t replied to Jaehyun’s messages in almost a week, which has never happened before—you talk almost everyday, even multiple times a day. Jaehyun’s last message was at 3 PM, when he said he’d come over. One look at your screen shows you it’s already 3:20. If you’ve memorized his schedule right, it takes your best friend thirty minutes to get to your dorm from his Fundamental Maths class. That means you have ten more minutes to get your shit together and clean your mess of a room. 

But right when you’ve mustered the energy to stand up, you hear a series of knocks on your door. That can’t be— “(Y/n), open up, I know you’re in there!” Jaehyun’s voice echoes from outside the door. “I asked your dormmate and she said you haven’t left your room since yesterday, so there’s no use pretending!” Shit, shit, shit! You immediately spring up and hastily fold your blankets and organize your desk, throwing away stray food wrappers and plastic cups. You open your blinds to let some air in, and the bright sunlight makes your head throb even more. 

On your way to the door, you spot yourself in the mirror. There’s no other word for it—you look like utter shit. Your eyebags are dark and prominent, your hair disheveled from tossing and turning in your sleep. You look horrendous, but Jaehyun is persistently knocking on your door, so you have no choice but to fix yourself up as fast as you can. You splash water on your face and smoothen down your hair and open the door—then there’s Jaehyun in all his glory. Your heart clenches seeing him; he looks as handsome as always, his bangs fluffy and soft and his letterman jacket fashionably oversized. He looks nothing like you in your ratty T-shirt with coffee stains and pajama shorts. His hand is halfway raised, positioned to knock at your door (he could and would probably do it all day if he had to). Upon seeing you, he blurts out: “Did I do something?”

Instead of answering him, you open your door wider as an invitation, and Jaehyun takes the hint, stepping into your dorm. Once the door is shut, Jaehyun peers at your messy room and remarks, “Wow. When was the last time you cleaned up? You’re usually not like this.”

You know he didn’t mean it like that, but his comment stings at you all the same. “Sorry, Jaehyun,” you snap, “not everyone can be at 200% energy all the time like you.” At his hurt expression, you backtrack. “Sorry, that was really rude of me.”

“It-It’s fine,” Jaehyun replies confusedly. Then he looks straight at you, eyes pleading. He’s picking at the stray thread hanging from his jacket, a habit you’ve come to known is something he does when he’s nervous. “You know what, I thought about it. For days, really, if I did anything that would make you mad and ignore me. But I couldn’t come up with anything at all. I was really worried when you didn’t reply to me for days on end, especially when we talk everyday. So if I did something, can—can you just tell me? I just want us to be okay.”

Your throat closes up and your heart pounds even faster, making you feel dizzy. You have no idea how to answer him, when all he’s ever seen of you is the perfect student who does everything right, who’s smart and good at what they do without any flaws or exceptions. How would he react if he saw you for who you really were?

The words can’t form in your mouth, and out of frustration at yourself, you tear up. Jaehyun notices this, eyes widening in worry, “(y/n), baby, no, no,” and pulls you into his arms. Almost instantly, the tears cascade down your face and sobs wrack your body. You feel pathetic crying in your best friend’s arms, but Jaehyun just soothes a hand up and down your back as you break down. His other arm is wrapped around your shoulders, and it feels like your anchor when you’re drowning in all your troubles. “It’s okay, it’s okay,” he says in a hushed tone, “let it all out.” You grip his jacket even tighter as you bury your face in his chest. 

When was the last time you’ve ever been hugged like this? The last time you’ve ever been truly vulnerable to anyone without that mask of perfection you often don? The last time you felt safe just being yourself? You have no idea. All you know that is in the circle of Jaehyun’s arms, you want to be small and imperfect and yourself just this once.

After your cries die down, Jaehyun clears his throat. “I’m sorry,” he whispers. “I don’t know what it is I did, but I’m so sorry for hurting you.”

“It’s not you, Jaehyun,” your voice is muffled by both your sniffles and Jaehyun’s chest. You don’t want Jaehyun to get the wrong idea that he’s hurt you in some way because of how broken he sounds thinking he’s done something to make you sad. “It’s just. Me.”

“You? What do you mean?” Jaehyun leads you into your room from the doorway. He’s holding your hand and doesn’t let go even when you both settle at the edge of your bed. His palm is warm and his grip loose enough in case you want to let go; you don’t. While you muster up the courage to speak, your best friend just sits there, waiting patiently. “It’s okay, whatever you say, I’m not going anywhere.” You don’t know that for sure, but him saying that makes you want to be truthful just this once, damn the consequences.

You take a deep breath, focusing on your intertwined fingers. You’re too scared to look at his face because you don’t want to see his reaction. “Jaehyun, what kind of person do you think people see me as?”

“Well…” He takes a moment to think about it. “Someone smart, talented, and who gets stuff done?”

In turn, you let out an resigned exhale. “Well, that’s the image I project. Of someone who’s perfect… someone who does things effortlessly. People think it comes easy to me. But it doesn’t. When people tell me that I didn’t need much effort to get to where I am now, I feel undermined. When I express I’m having a hard time, people brush it off and think I’m just overreacting. Because they think I’m perfect all the time. But honestly…? That’s the farthest thing from the truth."

Glancing up from your hands, you scan your room—your desk is a mess of papers and assignments that you have yet to get to. You can’t tell when the last time you spent time being actually productive when what you’ve been is fatigued out of your mind. When you try to sit at your desk and work, all you feel is difficulty concentrating and processing work and readings. Sleep has also proven to be elusive—no matter how long you lie in bed, you never feel well-rested. Simple actions and decisions require so much energy from you that you undeniably lack. You also constantly compare yourself to others, whom things like these come natural to them. But you’ve kept these feelings of yours secret for a long time—you’re utterly terrified that you’d be undermined for being useless and overly sensitive.   

“(Y/n)?” Jaehyun squeezes your hand, and you turn to meet his eyes. His eyes are sincere and kind. “I-I know I may not be the most empathic person, but I promise I’ll hear you out without judging you. I want to be here for you… and I hope you’ll let me. Please?” 

At this, you spill everything you’ve been feeling the past weeks—months, even—to Jaehyun. You stumble over your words and your breath gets caught in your throat, but he’s there to pat your back and to encourage you to keep going. Without you knowing, tears make their way down your face once again, and Jaehyun uses his other hand to gently brush them away. “It just gets so hard that I want to just. Give everything up. I don’t know what the use of trying so hard is when I see how other people don’t need this much effort to do even the most basic of tasks. It’s just so… unfair.”

When you’re finished with your rant, you don’t know what to expect from Jaehyun—but you’re stunned to see him crying. He’s sniffling and wiping at his eyes furiously. “Why…” You have no idea what he’s about to say, but you brace yourself for the worst. “Why didn’t you tell me any of this?” he whispers brokenly. “I didn’t know you were having such a difficult time. I feel like such a shitty friend for not even noticing. I’m sorry, (y/n).” Jaehyun’s eyes fill with tears and he starts “I… I thought we were best friends.” The best friends tell each other everything goes unsaid, but you know exactly what he meant.

“I…” You feel awful now for making Jaehyun cry. “You’re just. You just naturally have all this limitless energy. You’re…” Normal. Not like me. “I don’t know how if you were going to take me seriously if I told you what I was going through… There were times I’d see you, and I’d be so disappointed in myself for not being like you. And I was so scared that if I did tell you, I’d be letting you down.”

Jaehyun’s expression grows more miserable at this. “I-I’m sorry, (y/n), I never meant to make you feel unheard. And I never meant for it to feel like you couldn’t tell me about these things.” 

“It-It’s not your fault, Jaehyun,” you protest, but he shakes his head, obviously disappointed in himself.

“No, (y/n), I’m supposed to be your best friend. How stupid can I be if I can’t notice when you’re having a hard time? I didn’t even stop to ask how you’ve been doing because you seemed to be doing fine. But I should’ve known better. I shouldn’t have taken things at face value. I’m such an idiot,” Jaehyun berates himself. “I’m so, so sorry.” 

At his sincere apology, you can’t help but admit it to yourself—you desperately needed Jaehyun’s support as your best friend, but you were too scared to ask for it. And honestly? You felt immensely lonely without his words and presence to comfort you. 

“(Y/n), I hope you know that I see how hard you work. I know your sleepless nights and how much effort you put into every single thing you do. Despite everything you’re going through, you’re always trying to be better than the person you were yesterday, and it’s something I truly admire about you. But I hope you know it’s okay to be imperfect and flawed and to not be okay. I want to be here on your good and bad days. I just wish I could’ve been more vocal about this earlier… I’ve really taken you for granted, huh?” Jaehyun sighs wetly, taking your hand in both of his. He’s still crying; you both are, actually. What a silly pair the two of you make. 

“Thank you for trusting me and sharing all of this. It literally means the world to me,” Jaehyun rambles. “I promise I’ll be a better friend to you, someone you feel safe opening up to about anything, whether that be your achievements or your struggles. And (y/n), if it’s not too much to ask… Could I ask you to be more honest with me in the future?” He stares at you imploringly. “I don’t want you to think you have to go through all of this alone. I want to be here for you the same way you’ve always been there for me… Okay?”

“....Okay. Okay, I’ll try,” you respond softly. “Thank you, Jaehyun. I… I’ve never told anyone about this before. But thank you so much for just listening, and not judging, and accepting me for me…” While you appreciate Jaehyun’s presence at this moment, a new wave of fatigue washes over you with all this emotional vulnerability and talking. “Jaehyun… I’m still feeling really tired, so I might go back to sleep. Sorry, I know you came all the way here to see me, but here I am being shit company,” you apologize regretfully.

“Oh! That’s okay. I’ll see you tomorrow?” Jaehyun stands up from your bed to leave. When your fingers slip from each other, you feel an acute loss of warmth—both in your hands and in your heart. He makes his way to the door, slipping on his shoes, and your heart sinks. There’s something you badly want to ask of Jaehyun, but you’re too much of a coward to tell him what you truly want. You don’t want to be on your own right now, but you’d probably be asking too much of him. Accepting your fate, you settle in bed, attempting to take a nap so restless you’re sure will be of no help to your exhaustion.

However, Jaehyun himself stops in the doorway. He turns back around, a distraught look on his face. “(Y/n)... I don’t want to assume, but are you sure you want to be alone right now?” he begins. “I mean, we just had this really heavy talk. Can… Can I keep you company? I promise I’m great at cuddles—that’s what all my other friends say anyway when I annoy them with my hugs.”

When you nod, that’s all it takes for Jaehyun to shuck off his shoes, strip his jacket, and climb into bed with you. With your ear against his steady heartbeat and his comforting arm around you, you’re asleep in no time. It’s the best you’ve ever slept in months.

[roxygen22]

Would you kindly write a sequel to the "Bun in the Oven" fic please? and thank you!!!!

You are my very first ask - like, ever! I hope you enjoy.

C/W: Pregnancy, labor

A/N: You'll need to read Part 1 for context

Bun in the Oven (Part 2)

Willy was so excited about the news that he practically ran to the library the next morning to tell Noodle. He rushed through the door, yelling, "Noodle, I..." before a patron shushed him. "Oops, sorry!" he cringed and whisper-yelled in response.

Noodle ran out from behind the desk to grab Willy's arm and pulled him to the office. "Willy, you know the library rules. You gotta be quiet. Wait...," she paused with furrowed brow. "Is everything okay? Why aren't you at the factory or store? And why are you out of breath? Did you run over here?"

"I did! I have the most stupendous news." He paused for a breath. "[Y/N] is going to have a baby! You're going to be an aunt!" Willy picked her up and spun her around. He looked like he had eaten a hover choc; he was so excited that he could barely keep his feet on the ground.

"Whoa!! How long do I have to wait?" she asked through her grin.

"About seven or eight months. It's very early yet. Which gives me time."

"Time for what?" Noodle questioned.

"To learn everything I can, of course! There weren't exactly many expectant mothers or babies on my voyages. I didn't have any siblings to care for, either. I know little to nothing about how to take care of [Y/N] or the baby. I need to know what to expect for...expecting."

"Well, Willy, you've come to the right place to learn things. Let's get started!" Noodle started thumbing through the catalog, and off they went on a scavenger hunt for facts.

<><><><>

It was nearly lunchtime by the time they finished. Willy decided he would pay you a visit at work before heading back to the factory. This was a common occurrence, so much so that he was on a first name basis with all your coworkers, and they him.

"Hey, Willy!" the secretary said warmly. "[Y/N] is in the back."

"Great! Thanks, Sarah!" Willy smiled back. He ventured to the back of the shop to find you in the breakroom contentedly humming to yourself while getting your lunch ready. You hadn't yet spotted him, so he took advantage of the moment to stop and stare. You were already glowing. Sensing someone behind you, you looked up and beamed at him. "Willy! What are you doing here?"

"Hello, my sweet." He leaned down to kiss the top of your head, then sat down next to you. "You know, I can't wait to hear you hum like that to the baby. Did you know he or she is about the size of a pea right now?"

"I did not. Where did you learn this? Let me guess, you've already paid dear Noodle a visit at the library?"

"Indeed. I haven't even been to the factory yet today. I want to learn everything I can so I can take good care of you and the baby." He held up a bag of books he had checked out.

Tears started welling up in your eyes at the evidence of how genuinely excited Willy was about the prospect of being a father. He was diving head first into this experience, even doing research despite his challenges with reading. Seeing your tears, his smile faltered. "Am I overwhelming you?" he asked in a small voice.

"No, my love. I'm just so happy that you are so happy that I just can't contain it," you replied.

<><><><>

The months that followed did little to quell his excitement. He took great pleasure in telling the news to anyone who would listen, even once it became obvious. The whole town knew very quickly that the famous chocolatier and his wife were expecting.

You could not have asked for a better partner than Willy. He was quick to track down the object of your cravings at any time of day. He doted on you and did everything he could to ease your discomfort as your belly grew. He was tempted to make a chocolate remedy for anything that ailed you, but he also didn't want you testing his recipes unless he knew for certain that every ingredient was safe for baby.

It became Willy's evening routine to sing softly to your belly when he came home from the factory. You had been feeling flutters and kicks for a couple of months before he could finally feel them, too. The first time was a moment you'll cherish forever. You played with his hair as he rested his head in your lap. He suddenly stopped singing mid-lullaby. You looked down in time to see the shock on his face. "Was that...did the baby just kick?!" You smiled and nodded. He sat up and rested his large hand against your belly in time to feel another kick. He had the biggest, goofiest grin you had ever seen. After that, it became a little game between the two of them. Willy would nudge, baby would nudge, and so on.

<><><><>

You kept working until the last month of pregnancy, and that was only because Willy begged you to take leave and rest. Since business had picked up at the factory and stores, you could afford to take some time off; however, you needed to stay busy to keep your sanity. You used the time to put finishing touches on the baby's room.

Noodle often came by to check on you during her breaks or after the library closed. You were grateful to her for satisfying your craving for social interaction that was no longer fulfilled by your coworkers at the shop. It was lonely at home during the day when Willy was at work.

Like Willy, Noodle had also taken an interest in feeling the baby move around. The little one would suddenly become very active when they heard her voice. "Seems like we both like it when you stop by for a visit, Noodle."

"Do you think the baby will be a boy or a girl?" she asked as she looked up from her hands on your belly.

"I think it's a girl. Willy guesses a boy. What do you think?"

"I think...," she froze as she felt your belly tighten and sees you clench your teeth. "Are you alright?"

You took a breath and waved her off. "Oh, I'm fine. I've been having some discomfort off and on today, but it doesn't last long. What were you going to say?"

She eyed you suspiciously, "Ok, if you say so. I think it's a girl. But I will love them regardless."

You smiled. "Me, too. Now would you like a snack? I made some chocolate chip cook...," you paused as another more intense wave of pain radiated across your midsection. "Cookies."

Noodle stared at you with one eyebrow raised. "You can deny it all you want, but I think you're in labor. That wasn't even five minutes since the last contraction."

"Sounds like you have been studying with Willy," you said with a smirk.

"Should I go get him?"

"No, I don't want to bother him right now. This my first baby so it will take a while, even if this really is the start of labor. How about we play a game to pass the time? Dealer's choice." You broke out a deck of cards to distract the girl, but you remained keenly aware of the frequency of your discomfort.

About an hour later, you were overcome with pain, not just discomfort, severe enough that you couldn't talk through it. Noodle grabbed your hand in concern. When the pain subsided, she announced, "Alright, I am going to get Willy."

"Good idea, because I think my water just broke."

<><><><>

Noodle ran to the factory as fast as her legs could take her. After asking three Oompa Loompas, she finally found Willy elbow deep in the mechanics of his taffy pulling machine.

"Hey, Streudel! How's it...wait, why are you out of breath? Did you run here? Is it [Y/N]? Is she in labor?" Noodle, out of breath, could only nod once before Willy took off running. There would be no catching up to his long legs, so she took a pause on a candy mushroom by the chocolate river to catch her breath.

Willy [barely] had the wherewithal to stop at his desk on the way out to call the midwife. Coat, hat, and cane in hand, he bolted out the factory gate and headed for home. He came in to find you leaning against the kitchen wall with one hand and holding your back with the other. You heard him enter, but you were in too much pain to acknowledge him. Without a word, he came up behind you and started applying pressure in just the right spot of your lower back to ease some discomfort, enough that you could speak again.

"You have magical hands, my love," you sighed as you leaned against him.

"I called the midwife. She should be here soon," Willy said calmly. By the time she arrived, he had already gotten you settled in the bedroom. He never left your side, helping you into whatever position felt best to labor in.

After what felt like a lifetime, your son was born into Willy's arms in the wee hours of the night. The midwife patted Willy's cheeks and commented that they didn't even need her. He had it all under control. A tired smile graced your face as you took in the scene. All that studying paid off after all, you thought.

The midwife checked the baby boy over, cleaned him up, and handed him back to the proud father. "Hello, my little cocoa bean," you heard him whisper in awe. "I'm your papa."

Masterlist

[sweeneydino]

6. No idea if you like the ghosts-haunting-the-wrong-turtle enough to keep running with it, but I think it’s a really funny.

First of all, the ghosts waiting for the nth time— which is n times too many!— to see if Ronin will live (I don’t think he’s making it out of this one, guys…) and reviewing what the welcome wagon will say (We missed you, we’re proud of you, living the longest doesn’t make you the oldest—) when his spirit just goes *pop*. Dead silence, if you will.

And thus begins a mutiversal ghost hunt. (“Hello other dead us-es, have you seen an extra Mikey ghost around?” “No, but have you seen a lost Donny?”) They bop around a few universes until— yep, Mike’s soul is definitely SOMEWHERE in this universe. Wow! Things are weird and dense here.

Mikey: Hello, ghostly apparitions that look worryingly like my brothers! How are we today?

Ghosts: *water bubbling, fire crackling, wind howling*

Mikey: …I see!

(I can’t imagine the ghosts could like… communicate verbally to the living, or it would blow the whole identity issue wide open. They open their mouths and it’s just… ambient sounds related to their death.)

If there were ghosts, I think Splinter would 100% sense them, but initially be unable to tell who/what they are. Are some sewer maintenance workers haunting his house???? (No Michelangelo, he says, while doing the spiritual equivalent of shooing the ghosts away with a broom, I don’t think these things you are seeing are cause for concern, but let me know if it continues.)

The ghosts meanwhile, are in for a bit of a ride.

(‘Daw, it’s good to see Mikey smiling again.

…hey guys, don’t you think Spike’s acting weird for a turtle?

Stop reading into things too much.

…

Shit, Spike’s in the mutagen.

Oh, that’s absolutely Slash, we need to warn Mikey!

…

Well, there he goes…

…

Did Slash, or Titan, whatever, seem familiar to you?

Well sure, that was Slash, we know him, but he’s disappeared now, so I don’t think—

No… I mean, are we sure Mike got reincarnated into a *mutant* turtle body?

…oh shit)

…Do you think that the Ronin brothers meet Tang Shen?

Titan starts seeing his brothers while he’s defending NYC during the Kraang invasion, and just mentally shrugs, because, yeah, figures that he’d start imagining things around now.

And lastly:

Splinter, after everything’s settled and he’s figured out who the ghosts are: So, what can you tell me about the spirits following you?

Titan, who thought he was hallucinating again: the w  h  a  t?

Pictured: Ghost gossip Mikey is not privy to.

Idk how but you managed to get it spot on- lol I'm not sure if I can answer all this without spoiling much .... oh well! I'll give short answers :))

They do go on a little ghostly adventure for their missing brother, mostly when they feel something pull on them when someone we know experiences a rather shattering revelation before being pushed off a building.

The ghosts do actually speak like that :O With how the 2012 universe goes, I thought it'd be nice to have the Ronin boys look/sound a little creepier. Since 2012 is so messed up lmao.

Splinter does, in fact, sense them and can't seem to put a finger on their identity, especially a certain one he feels only when he's meditating.

Truly, I haven't thought much if they could see Tang Shen, but i believe they'd only be able to sense her, really.

And lastly:

Also, love the ghost gossip 💕 I honestly think the little ghost side plot is kind of bittersweet? But I like it :))

[secretsecretbunny]

idk if you do drabble requests but I love your writing so much! you really have a way with words so i was wondering if maybe you'd do a drabble about new!idol fem reader (can be solo or group w/e) who really looks up to and admires BTS and they meet her before watching her perform for the first time? also maybe there's some flirting? (idc which members I'm ot7) just one of my lil day dreams I wanna get out there 🥺 anyway! keep writing, you're genuinely really good 🫶🏻

I do now!! This sounded too cute to pass up 💕

Title: "Run."

Genre: drabble, one-shot, casual??? fluff??? idk how to describe this one lmao. I hope you enjoy!

Notes: y/s/n = "your stage name". Things that are underlined are links to the outfits described.

Your nerves had you literally shaking with anticipation as you waited behind the scenes of the show. So many incredible talents were performing today and here you were, an unknown newbie who was about to take the stage in front of a live audience. Why did they even want you to debut at this big of an event in the first place? Your manager reassured you it was because they believed in your talent and knew that taking a chance on you and letting your first performance be somewhere as prestigious as this would draw in fans, who would appreciate the unique sound you bring to the table. In particular, if the responses of other idols who are more famous and well-known were captured on camera and shared with their fanbase through broadcasts or similar media channels.

The way they styled you had you feeling nervous as well, with a form-fitting pink mini skirt that hugged your curves and a white button up top that was tucked in with a black and pink tie, adding a touch of elegance to your look. The cropped black blazer and black gogo boots with heels made you feel like you were going to fall at any moment, but the white leather garter with a chain on one of your thighs added a bold touch to your outfit. You felt a little exposed but you took a moment to be silently appreciative of the safety shorts you wore beneath your skirt.

You had always dreamed of being part of a group, working together towards a common goal. That's why you were initially brought on as a trainee for the company in the first place. However, after careful consideration and evaluation of your skills and strengths, it was ultimately decided that your talents would be best utilized flying solo. But you deeply wished you had people to lean on, members who could offer support and distract from your potential mistakes. You tugged at your skirt awkwardly as you stood around waiting for your time to perform. You still had nearly 30 minutes but you were too nervous to sit, instead you opted for watching the screen positioned on the wall, showing the current performers on stage.

You smiled at the screen at the talent being shown. BTS. You had a deep admiration for the group and enjoyed watching them perform their song DNA. The members exuded confidence and comfort on stage, making it seem like they never worried about mistakes at this point in their career. You watched as they moved fluidly across the stage, perfectly in sync with one another. 

A close up of Jimin had you grinning like an idiot. God he was pretty. Fuck, they all were. Hoseok with his vibrant smile, Namjoon with his unique features and buff build, Yoongi and his piercing eyes, Taehyung sporting the flirtiest looks you had ever seen, Jungkook somehow looking both innocent and dangerously delicious, and Jin with his world wide handsome face. And even more than their looks, they were so incredibly talented and hardworking.

You had heard the detailed story of how they rose to the top, overcoming numerous challenges and obstacles along the way. Their journey was filled with both good and bad experiences, but through it all, they showed great dedication and strength. And here you were, you hadn't even had your first performance yet and you had been ready to give up multiple times just during your 4 years of being a trainee. Working for the same label as the musicians who inspired you to pursue music in the first place left you feeling both grateful and slightly out of place, as if you hadn't earned your spot there yet.

You completely dismissed those thoughts and made your way towards the snack and beverage area, specifically designated for idols and staff members. You were in dire need of water and something sweet to give you an energy boost. As the boys finished their performance, the booming cheers from the crowd echoed through the air. You froze in surprise when you heard the seven of them laughing and panting out of breath as they entered the same room you were in. You attempted to seem nonchalant as they eagerly grabbed water bottles and snacks for themselves, while you discreetly tucked your hair behind your ear and reached for a water bottle too, all the while listening intently as Jungkook and Hoseok laughed uncontrollably about some unknown joke or incident.

In their fit of laughter Jungkook backed up into you, making you stumble back a bit. He whipped around suddenly "shit, sorry!" he apologized with a small bow. "Kookie you've gotta be more careful!" came a voice from behind you. The voice placed a hand on your shoulder. "You okay?" As you turned your head, you caught sight of Jimin with a gentle smile on his face. You quickly nodded in response, your eyes wide, causing him to let out a soft chuckle. "Hey! We making new friends?" Came Hoseok's voice as he reached his hand out to you. "I'm Hoseok. Or Hobi, J-Hope, whatever's fine." he said. His signature smile was contagious, spreading warmth to the pit of your stomach as he spoke. You took his hand lightly, stifling a giggle. "I uh, I know who you are. I'm y/n. Or y/s/n. Whatever's fine." You mimicked with a warm smile. He laughed. "Nice to meet you, y/n!" His hand was warm, and making your head swim, prompting you to let go.

"Wait, y/s/n?" Yoongi asked, stepping into the conversation. "The new girl? You're debuting today, right?" As you glanced in his direction, your nervousness was evident in the rapid nodding of your head. "Mhmm! In uh.." you checked the time on your phone. "shit.. 15 minutes actually." You said, taking a shaky breath in. "Nervous?" came Taehyung's voice from behind Yoongi.

You were now the center of attention for the seven boys, who were anxiously anticipating your next words. "Incredibly so.." you replied, making them all smile at you. "Hey I'm sure you're going to do great!" Namjoon chimed in "yeah, you're going to sound amazing!" Said Jin. They all nodded as you laughed

"you guys have never even heard me sing, how would you know?" You asked with a playful lilt in your voice. "Well, you're beautiful, so I'm sure your voice matches." God. Jimin was just as flirty as people described him, with a playful smile and a wink that could light up the room. You rolled your eyes with a laugh. "Smooth, pretty boy." You chuckled out, making him smirk. Jungkook looked you up and down for a moment "Your outfit looks great, your stylists did an amazing job." You took a moment to examine your outfit, making sure every piece was in its place and smoothing out any wrinkles on your skirt.

"Thanks, I actually had to beg them to add black into the theme. They originally wanted me in all pink and white and that's just... really not my vibe." This had Hoseok raising a brow. "What's not your vibe? ...sweet and innocent?" He asked with a smirk and the tilt of his head.

For just an instant, your eyes flickered with something that looked almost like mischief before settling back into their usual serenity; however fleeting this transformation may have been, its impact left ripples. Luckily you were saved by staff running up to you. "Y/n you have 10 minutes! Please come get your hair and makeup touched up!" The girl sounded almost panicked. You gave her a sweet smile. "Be right there!" You said, putting your sweet and shy persona back on. "I should run. Thanks for the pep talk, boys!" you said with a small bow. "You got this!" Namjoon said as you turned to leave. Jin's voice stopped you "would it make you more or less nervous if we said we'll be watching?" You paused for a moment in thought. "Hmm, well, I think I'd be more motivated not to fall on my ass if I knew THE Bangtan was watching my every move." This made them smirk. "We'll have our eyes glued to you then." Hoseok said with a subtle wink, his voice low. "You better." You replied amorously as you walked away.

With you fully out of earshot now, the boys spoke. "she's cute as hell."  Jungkook said. "Hm, she acts cute, but I think she's a little darker than that." Hoseok laughed. "Her and Jimin have the same vibes" Taehyung said playfully. "Oh, so I'm cute AND sexy? Thanks Taetae." Jimin retorted playfully, making the man roll his eyes. "Alright guys keep it in your pants." Yoongi commented. "Right, let's just go watch her performance like we promised, yeah?" Namjoon stated as they headed towards the changing room to switch outfits before returning to the audience.

As you stepped onto the stage, your nerves seemed to vanish into thin air as you effortlessly slipped into your performance persona. The song you performed was sultry, sassy, and sensual. Your manager referred to it as 'the triple S.' You found that you fell into the role easier than you thought you would since you discovered that with how bright the stage's colorful lights were, you could barely even see the crowd, but you could feel their energy and passion.

As your performance was coming to a close, one of your backup dancers suddenly fell near your feet. Despite knowing you needed to continue with the choreography, it felt wrong to simply step around her and ignore her situation. So, you decided to help her up while still singing and dancing, offering a reassuring smile and squeezing her hand gently when she looked panicked. She quickly fell back into the routine and the rest of the performance went on without another issue. 

As soon as you left the stage, you were immediately ushered off to change into more appropriate clothing for sitting in the audience with the other idols who either weren't performing or had already finished their performances. A simple long black dress with two high slits on either side, though you still wore a leather garter with a chain, this time in black though. Your seat was just a row behind the bts boys, you gave a small bow and a smile as you passed them. Once you sat down, Hoseok, Jimin, and Jungkook all turned around to give you a thumbs up or small claps, telling you that you had done a good job. Despite your best efforts you couldn't fight the bright smile that took over your features.

No more than 2 hours later you were at the after party being reprimanded by your manager for stopping mid performance to help your backup dancer. "You know you're supposed to keep going in instances like that!" She barked out. "I technically did keep going! I wasn't just going to ignore her while she was struggling!" You spat back with an eye roll, arms crossed over your chest. She let out a deep sigh, her shoulders sagging in resignation.

However, before she could continue with whatever she was going to say, you abruptly turned and started walking away from her. Unfortunately for you though, your hasty retreat led you straight into the path of an oncoming person - or more specifically, their chest - resulting in a jarring impact that sent you stumbling backward several steps. "fuck! I mean, augh... sorry!" you bowed. "We're just always bumping into each other, huh? Now we're even." you looked up to see Jungkook with a couple of the boys not far behind. You let out a small laugh "I guess we are." as Hoseok walked up, he peeked around you for a moment, eyeing your manager as she huffed and stomped away.

"You get in trouble for something?" he asked. You nodded with another eye roll. "She's upset that I stopped to help my backup dancer when she fell." His eyebrows furrowed "she's mad at you for being a kind a decent human being?" You smiled "that's one way to put it I suppose." you replied. Jimin, hearing the conversation being had, pouted "I thought it made you look cool and likeable!" he said with a tilt of his head. You anxiously fiddled with your fingers, feeling a bit nervous. "Thanks guys, I appreciate it. I really hope it didn't ruin the performance." Hoseok shook his head. "Not at all! You were amazing up there!" Jungkook and Jimin nodded, agreeing. "Let me get you something to drink to get your mind off it, yeah?" He added. You smiled "sure, that'd be great."

As Jimin and Jungkook started mingling with the crowd, you and Hoseok headed towards the bar, located at the distant end of the room. The venue had arranged for an assortment of drinks to be served, and the bartender was busy filling orders.

He ordered you your drink of choice and something for himself as well. You two engaged in a casual conversation for nearly half an hour, exploring various topics and discovering shared interests such as music, movies, and hobbies. The ice in your second round of drinks had mostly melted, indicating they were nearing completion when he posed the question "you wanna get out of here?"

Halting your speech mid-sentence, you turned to face him with an inquiring gaze before your expression shifted into a sly grin that showed your true intentions. "Absolutely." You responded. He grinned widely as he grabbed your hand, his grip firm and confident, leading you towards the exit with purpose.

As you walked, he waved goodbye to his members, a gesture that seemed almost automatic. You spotted your manager heading towards you, her expression written in annoyance, causing your heart to race in anticipation. You gave Hoseok's hand a stern warning squeeze as your manager approached, making him raise an eyebrow at you in confusion. However, the mischievous grin spreading across your features told him everything he needed to know - you had no intention of being deterred by anyone.

"Run."

You said before pulling him into a dash towards the exit. You both burst into a fit of laughter as you rapidly made your way out of the building, the sound of your hurried footsteps on the hard floor growing fainter with each passing second until you were no longer in sight.

Tonight might be fun after all, you decided.

aaaa okay how was that? Thoughts? Critiques? Requests? Let me know what's up. Love you!! 🩷

[ghostsbimbo]

TF141 x Disabled!Reader; Cerebral Palsy

a/n: writing this from my own experience. i am mobile & independent w/o aids due to years of physical therapy, but it's getting harder. Please note, this disability is rare. There isn't much representation in media either, it's quite hard to find, there's 2 or 3 actors, a comedian or two. so I kind of want a small thing, y'know?

Task Force 141 [ General Statement ]

Okay, so this disability is rare (200k cases per year in the US - I do not know about other countries). I have the genuine belief that when they first meet you and you tell them that you have the disability, they actually start looking it up right in front of you. Not only out of curiosity, but because they want to help you.

John Price

He knew it was one of those days for you. He could tell just from you sitting up in bed and hearing the wince you had tried so hard to hide from him. He sighed softly, mentally questioning himself before finally deciding to ask it. "Wheelchair and cane day, love?" "Yeah...Wheelchair and cane day." You admitted, sighing softly. He sat up and leaned over, kissing your head before getting out of your shared bed, ready to help get you whatever you needed.

Simon "Ghost" Riley

You two were at home while he was on leave, eating dinner - steak, a favorite of yours - but you were struggling with cutting it with the knife. Growing up physical therapy focused on the use of your dominant hand - especially with writing - so when it came to using your non-dominant hand? it was beyond a struggle to do things. Cutting up foods was one of them. "You want my help, love?" Simon asked, tilting his head. He understood you didn't like asking him for help, he understood you wanted independence when it came to even the simplest things, but he could also tell when you were getting frustrated. You simply nodded, placing the fork and knife down and carefully pushing the plate over to his side for help.

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick

You tried your best to not be a messy eater. Like, to the point where you were constantly wiping your mouth, taking small bites of food, eating slow. but then there were days you just couldn't put that much brain power into being a conscious eater. It was a 'low spoons day' as you put it. Your body already hurt constantly due to your stiff muscles, which took a lot out of you on rainy days, so why make the effort to not be messy considering your body was already in so much pain. "Babe...You uh, got a little..." Gaz started, before getting a paper towel and carefully wiping the ice cream off your upper lip and the tip of your nose. You just blushed brightly and mumbled out a quick thank you and an apology. He just let out a soft chuckle and smiled at you. "It's alright, love, at leas you're enjoying something today, yeah?"

Johnny "Soap" MacTavish

You were scuffing your feet instead of actually walking walking. A habit that took years of physical therapy to break. You liked not having to think about not having to walk when you were in pain, but not many other people appreciated the noise. It irritated them. And that's how you got where you are now. In your work's break room, shakily texting your boyfriend to come pick you up. A customer had berated you in front of other customers and your boss in the store. He did get kicked out by your manager of course, but due to you being low spoons, that was your breaking point. Johnny was aloud in the break room on these kind of days. It was something your manager understood you might need on certain days. "C'mon love, you already clocked out, right?" You nodded and you guys walked out to his car, hand in hand with him rubbing small soothing circles on the back of your hand.

[lowkeyremi]

His birthday k. bokuto

Remi's note: Happy birthday to my favorite owl, ily (also i wrote the sky-diving thing based on my own experience)

CW: established relationship, fluff, kinda rushed

"WOOHOO!" He screams, and you startle awake.

"W-what? Ko baby what's up?" You ask sleepily. You open your eyes, they're bleary and you're trying to comprehend what's going on right now.

"Honey get up! It's my birthday! Let's go celebrate!!" Bokuto spouts all at once. You'd think after a certain age people wouldn't care too much about their birthdays. Your husband proves you wrong because he is twenty-eight, and still excited like a two year old going to chuck-e-cheese for their birthday.

"Slow your roll, I still need to get up. I also need caffeine." You mumble. Those golden eyes watch as you sit up and blink slowly to adjust to the morning.

"Don't worry, sweetness! I already made you some (coffee or tea)!" He exclaims with a cup in his hand. How did that get there? You could have sworn that wasn't in his hand a few seconds ago.

When he hands you the mug you take a nice long sip with a loud exhale at the end. "Thanks, Ko."

"Mhm, what're you feeling today? I have a couple outfits picked out for ya!" He points to the dress where sure enough, there are three or four outfits laid out.

"Where are we going? You seem to wanna get a move on." The one thing that you never understood was why Bokuto wanted to spoil you on his birthday. He always takes you places and buys you stuff. He says 'seeing you happy makes me happy, and that's all I want for my birthday.'

Every year he tells you not to get him anything besides your love. Which is cheesy. You got him something.

This actually took a long time to plan because you had to think of something he wouldn't expect. Kuroo played a role in your surprise gift.

"Yeah I do. We're driving two hours today. The sooner we get there the better." You look at him in disbelief.

"Kotaro Bokuto." You say sternly.

"I promise this time it's gonna be something I wanna do." That's what he's said in the past and it was never true.

----

He watched you go through you're daily routine, smiling at every little thing. He was over excited about helping you with little things like slipping your shoes on or setting the timer so your makeup could dry.

You guys where ready to go around nine am. Bokuto stopped by his favorite restaurant to get breakfast to go for the ride.

"These burritos never fail!!" He exaggerates with a loud moan as he takes another huge bite.

"You are a piece of work." You sigh with a smile taking a bite out of your own burrito.

Throughout the ride Bokuto plays songs you used to listen to when he first met you. He purposely sung off key just to piss you off make you laugh.

He wanted to play road-trip games but you had to remind him countless times that he was DRIVING so he can't play road-trip games.

------

You really had no clue where he'd brought you. The place looked empty based on the amount of cars present in the parking lot. Before you can even process it, he opens your car door, "Come on honey, don't wanna be late."

Your hands are intertwined and he guides you into a small white building.

"I brought you to an indoor sky-diving place because I'm too scared to actually sky-dive, yet." He explains, a grin crosses your face when he mentions real sky-diving.

"Let's do it then!" You say excitedly.

Bokuto checks you two in for your reservation. The instructor takes you two back to a little room to teach you the basics of indoor sky-diving. She says it's similar to outdoor sky-diving. She shows you the three hand signals you'll need to know so the operate can know how you're feeling.

Once you two have grasped the concept so she brings you to the sky-diving area. Bokuto goes first, he looks so cute and funny swinging his legs all around in the glass cylinder trying to remember what the woman had taught him.

"Baby look! I'm flying!" He yells trying to flap like a bird, which messes up his flow and causes him to bump into the glass wall. Your giggle goes unnoticed as he exists the glass when the air stops flowing.

"Mrs. Bokuto, you're up!" The operator yells. After checking your helmet once more you're stepping into the cylinder.

Over all the experience was quite fun and you got some good pictures of your husband being silly.

-----

When you arrived home, you put your hand over Bokuto's eyes in order to keep him from looking.

You motion to Kuroo who is already in you're house looking at you waiting for the signal.

"Okay Ko, open them up!" He opens his eyes and you remove your hand. Standing round your kitchen table is Tsukki, Kuroo, Akaashi, Kenma, Atsumu, Hinata, and surprisingly Sakusa.

"Happy birthday!!" They all say in unison.

"I wanted you to celebrate with your friends, so outside I set up the net so you guys can play a few rounds of volleyball." You say meekly with a huge smile plastered on your face.

"Babyyyyyy." Bokuto drags out with a smile.

"Thank you so much! Come on guys! Let's go play some volleyball before it gets super late!" Bokuto kisses you. When he detaches his lips from you, he grabs your arm and drags you out to come play volleyball with all his friends.

[bbobpul]

break my heart again 2 — njm

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader SUMMARY.how's jaemin gonna give back for all of y/n's efforts now that he finally can? it's been years—just how much has everything changed? GENRE. angst, fluff, she fell first 🤭 W/C. 3.5k NOTE. hello, part two is here! so sorry i couldn't make a taglist. i didn't have time to make one. nevertheless, i hope this fic make its way back to you. love u all and thankies sm !!!! also, my requests are open !!!

(⁠☉⁠｡⁠☉⁠)⁠!⁠→ my other works !!!!!! part one here!!

i find it hard to picture myself ever being as dedicated to something or someone again, just like how i dedicated my entire college life to na jaemin.

lately, i've been feeling like i forgot what it's like to actually have a dream. back then, na jaemin was my dream, he was my driving force. i would force myself to wake up so early in the morning just so i could see him (or his car) enter the gates of the university. i would go to school even though i am sick and feel a lot better when i get home because i saw na jaemin. but now two years after graduating, i still haven't found a decent job that i actually enjoy.

it's a common experience that many people go through, and i suppose i shouldn't complain about it. maybe i need to put in more effort and push myself harder. part of me wonders if having na jaemin back in my life would rekindle that same sense of dedication that i once had. but as i say these thoughts out loud, they sound absurd, even to myself. why would i wish for my first love to return just so i could find a decent job? why would i long for na jaemin to come back merely to feel that spark in my life again? it's puzzling why i'm even dwelling on thoughts of him and wondering if he holds the key to my happiness and success.

oh, to dream.

oh, for that old dedication to still burn within you.

if only you hadn't acted so dumb that day. could life have taken a different path? are you even happy now? if you hadn't let fear hold you back back then, if you'd actually been brave enough to listen and follow through, would you be happier today?

but no matter how much you keep bothering yourself with that memory, if people come up to you and ask if you feel bad about everything that happened that day, you'd say no. you don't feel bad at all.

deciding to let him go was one of the best things you did. he seemed happy when you left, and after that, you never heard anything about him. he's like a touchy subject in your group of friends, which can be tough sometimes since you share friends. but does it really matter now? him not being in your life probably means he's happier and more peaceful, right?

are you feeling peaceful? is being stuck in a 9-5 job that hardly brought you joy a happy situation? scratch that. did being in that job make you happy? clearly not, as you've just mustered the bravery to quit. and in doing so, you've never felt more joyful.

did you really make the right decision?

just as you were pondering your own question, your phone buzzed on the bedside table. you grabbed it and saw that the caller was renjun, your incredibly patient best friend.

"y/n," he said, his tone becoming unusually serious. "what's up?" you asked. "do you need money?" "yeah?" "here's the deal: our college is putting together a documentary film, and they've chosen your department. but guess what? your old classmates are bombarding me with messages because it looks like you're ignoring them all. frankly, i can't believe you even answered my call," he griped. "wait, hold on. what film? and why would they pick me? are they searching for someone with a post-college life so sad that it belongs in a documentary?" "well, you were practically a legend back in college, so… and apparently, the director specifically wants you, which leads to… well, another issue…" "what's the problem now?" "it's going to be directed by jaemin."

and just like that, you ended the call. but a few seconds later, renjun's call came in again.

"i'm not going to do it." "you stubborn brat." "why him?" "i have no idea!" "why is he even directing? wasn't he studying architecture or something?" "i don't know, y/n. i haven't heard a single thing about him since your graduation." "what do you mean?" "that's not important now, y/n. you're in need of money, right? seize the opportunity. do it for the cash." “so will you do it or will you do it?” “for the cash.”

...

"y/n, you've moved on, haven't you? what's done is done. i'm pretty sure jaemin has forgotten all about it. this chance is coming your way, so just accept it." "i guess i will."

you're drawn in by the idea of making some extra money and the possibility of catching the eye of potential agents or employers. right now, you're at a crossroads, thinking about how this documentary could be a stepping stone to more job opportunities down the line. this situation is different from what usually drives you – this time, it's not about others, it's about focusing on your own goals and aspirations.

you're deliberately avoiding dwelling on your past. just as renjun mentioned, you've moved beyond it. what's done is done. right now, your focus is firmly on the present and the potential that lies ahead in the future.

what's in the past is behind us, including whatever existed between jaemin and you.

from renjun

tomorrow at lunchtime, they'll be going over the schedules and discussing what to film. if you want, you can chat with the director now. his number is 0825 813 2000.

in response, you simply replied with a "okay."

the night before the lunch meeting, a jumble of emotions has you in its grip. the idea of reconnecting with jaemin, who used to be your best friend and is now someone distant, fills you with a sense of awkwardness. you tell yourself that this is about working together and the chance to grow professionally.

after taking a deep breath, you decide to shoot jaemin a text. your fingers hesitate as you type, and the uncertainty you're feeling seems to seep into your message. you finally press send, and your text reads, "hey, it's y/n. heard we're meeting tomorrow for the documentary. just wanted to check in before that."

in almost no time, your phone buzzes with a response: "hey y/n, good to hear from you. yeah, looking forward to our meeting. let's catch up and chat about the project."

the conversation is polite, but beneath the surface, there's an unspoken layer of complexity. you can feel the hesitation in your exchange, a silent recognition of the shared history that's now a distant memory. as you talk about the meeting and the documentary, the easy flow you once had is noticeably absent.

as the texts go back and forth, a sense of tension seems to hang in the air. it's as though the years of friendship you once had are casting a shadow over your conversation. the effortless connection you once shared now requires effort, and both of you can sense the change.

as the conversation wraps up with a simple "see you tomorrow," you're left with a mix of excitement and anxiety. the idea of seeing jaemin again, especially in a professional context, stirs up a range of emotions. this situation is a stark reminder of just how much things have changed – and maybe how some things can't go back to the way they were.

you believed the conversation had concluded, only for your phone to ring once more, bearing yet another message from him. as you read the words on the screen, "i missed you, y/n," a rush of emotions floods over you.

"what's going on with him?" you mutter to yourself, your eyebrows knitting together in confusion. your gaze remains fixed on the message for a moment, your attention drawn to the three blinking dots in the corner – a sign that he's in the process of typing a response. several more seconds tick by, the dots eventually vanishing, and in response, you shut your phone off. you make an attempt to settle into bed and get some rest, but truth be told, it's hard to claim you managed to sleep soundly that night. an undercurrent of thoughts and emotions keeps your mind restless.

the day of lunch lunch finally arrived. you sat across from jaemin, his words forming a distant hum as your thoughts remained clouded and preoccupied. the lingering impact of his recent message kept you in a state of unease, making it difficult to fully engage in the conversation he was leading.

then, something inside you snapped, and you found yourself abruptly interrupting him with a question that had been gnawing at you, "why me?"

he looked at you, his gaze steady, and his response was quick, "why not you?"

your frustration simmered as his words hit you. he was choosing to be cryptic, and it was only adding to your confusion. pushing past your exasperation, you pressed on, "listen, i know we didn't part on the best terms, but why come back now and act like everything's fine? i mean, sure, it's better than hostility, but why choose me? i'm the one who's no longer part of your life."

his expression remained neutral, void of any emotions as he replied, "that's not true."

you raised an eyebrow, challenging him to elaborate. "what's not true?"

"that you have nothing to do with my life, y/n," he stated firmly.

the weight of his words settled heavily between you two, the gravity of the situation growing more apparent. the lunch table had transformed into an arena for confronting unresolved issues.

you scoffed, unable to hold back your disbelief. "jaemin, i made one mistake, and now you're trying to imply that my actions shaped your entire life?"

his eyes held yours, unwavering. "y/n, it's not just about that one mistake. everything that followed, everything that shaped who i am today… it's all connected to you."

your mind reeled, trying to grasp the enormity of what he was suggesting. the complexities of your shared history seemed to crash over you, leaving you grappling with a whirlwind of emotions and a tangled web of unspoken feelings.

the weight of his words left you momentarily speechless, and in an attempt to shift away from the intensity, you sought to change the subject. "where are the other producers? why is it just you here?"

"y/n…" he began, his tone suggesting he wanted to continue the previous conversation.

however, you opted to sidestep the discussion entirely. you pretended as if the profound exchange hadn't just occurred. "i notice you're taking on the role of a director now. quite the career shift, huh?" you inquired, masking your internal turmoil with a casual demeanor. you acted as if there hadn't been a two-year gap in your connection, as though things between you were perfectly ordinary.

he met your gaze, a faint hint of something unreadable in his eyes. "i pursued another dream when i felt i'd lost the chance for my first one."

"your first dream… not architecture, then?" you prodded, curious about the direction he had taken.

he shook his head, a soft chuckle escaping him, leaving you puzzled yet again. "no, not architecture. well, i suppose that just wasn't meant for me back then, but maybe it is now."

the cryptic nature of his response only added to the layers of confusion and intrigue that surrounded him. there was something about the way he spoke that hinted at deeper currents beneath the surface, emotions and experiences that he hadn't fully revealed. you found yourself torn between the desire to push for answers and the instinct to allow him his privacy. the lunch meeting had transformed into a stage for untangling not just the complexities of the documentary but also the intricate web of emotions and history between you and jaemin.

leaving the restaurant, a whirlwind of unanswered questions dances in your mind. yet, for now, you choose to tuck those thoughts away, focusing instead on the looming filming date just a few days away – next saturday.

in the span of time between that lunch and the upcoming shoot, jaemin proves consistent in his attempts to bridge the gap between you two. he regularly reaches out, updating you about his day and proposing get-togethers, which you consistently decline.

the days pass, marked by a series of messages and missed opportunities. despite the undeniable tension, there's an undeniable persistence on jaemin's part, a determined effort to reconnect and reestablish a sense of familiarity. however, your apprehensions and the memories of your past dynamics hold you back, keeping you from embracing his overtures.

as the countdown to the filming day continues, you find yourself in a delicate dance – balancing the unresolved history between you and the prospects of the future. the lines between your personal and professional lives are blurred, and the documentary project becomes a backdrop against which the intricacies of your relationship with jaemin play out.

you find yourself constantly pondering what his intentions could be. his actions leave you wondering, and you can't help but question what he's aiming for. in your perspective, you're merely a negative aspect of his life – a streak of misfortune. you would have expected him to have learned from the past, but his determination remains unshakeable.

as you contemplate these thoughts, your phone lights up once more, bearing yet another message from him. his name on the screen triggers a whirlwind of emotions – a mixture of uncertainty, annoyance, and a hint of curiosity. opening the message, you brace yourself for whatever he might convey this time. the consistency in his attempts at communication only serves to deepen the intricate web of emotions you hold for him, leaving you caught between your shared history and the unpredictability of the present.

"the offer's still there, y/n. :)" "jaemin, let's be real. just because i'm on board with your documentary idea doesn't mean we're suddenly best buds again. a lot has changed." "i want to reconnect, though." "actually, scratch that. i want to get to know you all over again." "jaemin, i appreciate the effort, but let's keep things professional, okay?" “i’m sorry, y/n. goodnight.”

after your straightforward message, his responses ceased. a silence settled in, stretching on until saturday – the day you were set to see him again. the anticipation and uncertainty had been building, and now the moment was finally at hand.

you stepped into the studio and immediately noticed that you and jaemin were the only ones present. your confusion must have been evident on your face, prompting him to address the situation promptly.

"um, the team thought having fewer people in the room would create a more personal atmosphere," he began, his voice carrying a hint of unease. "and, well, they decided to keep me here, you know, being the director and all, and also because we have a history…"

his words trailed off, and there was a subtle vulnerability in his tone. it was as if he was acknowledging the intricacies of your past connection, while simultaneously recognizing the complexities it introduced into your current dynamic. the studio, usually a place of creativity and collaboration, had transformed into a space laden with the weight of your shared history.

"it's okay," you responded, your words carrying a touch of reassurance. as your reply registered, a faint smile tugged at the corners of his lips – a detail you couldn't help but notice. after all, it was that very smile that had ignited four years of your life, a smile that held memories and emotions you had both shared.

"um, i'll just ask you a few questions, and then you're free to go," he stated, his voice carrying a hint of nervousness that didn't escape your notice. this new facet of his demeanor felt unfamiliar to you, a departure from the confident jaemin you had known.

you found yourself disliking this uneasiness, and a thought occurred to you – maybe it was time to rekindle something within him. as he began asking you questions, you decided to respond in a way that would evoke a certain familiarity between you two. it was a subtle attempt to bridge the gap, to draw out the person you once knew.

you had believed that his silence was what you wanted. you had convinced yourself that distancing yourself from him would protect you from the past mistakes. but now, facing the reality of the situation, you realized that perhaps a certain selfishness was ingrained within you. maybe, just maybe, you yearned to erase the distance, to defy your own rationalizations.

in this moment, you found yourself yearning to rekindle what had been lost, to bring back a connection that once meant so much. the conflicting emotions within you painted a complex picture of your desires – a battle between self-preservation and the longing for something more.

however, as you locked eyes with him and saw the lack of any discernible emotion in his gaze, a haunting wave of fear resurfaced within you. in that moment, it was as if time rewound, taking you back to the day of your graduation when your heart and spirit had felt shattered. the memory of that painful experience rushed back, accompanied by the doubts and uncertainties that had plagued you.

if you were to truly confront your own feelings, you'd admit that what you witnessed that night had left you questioning your own worth. the events had stirred up doubts about whether you had ever been deserving of taking risks for, whether you had ever been someone worth fighting for.

"hey, good morning, y/n."

"morning, director."

"how's today treating you?"

"pretty good, thanks."

"hmm, and what's life been like after college?"

"…"

"take your time."

"at first, i felt okay. my friends were all getting closer to their dreams, and i was genuinely happy for them. especially…"

"especially who?"

"especially the person i left behind."

"…"

"i was content being happy for someone else. then another year went by, and i wasn't feeling so great anymore."

"do you really think they're happy?"

"hmm?"

"the person you left behind."

"yeah. and my other friends seem happy too. they've got jobs they love, they're with people they care about, and i only had… renjun *laughs* … but sometimes, i can't help but feel like i'm the one who got left behind, you know? even though i was the one who walked away."

"let's talk about your person."

"oh *laughs* he's not my person."

pausing for a moment, you glanced at jaemin behind the camera. the question lingered in your mind: what was he trying to do? his actions and intentions remained a puzzle.

his expression grew serious, his gaze fixed intently on you. it was as if he had something to convey, something he was holding back.

"the last time i actually saw him was in an instagram post. he was with some girl. it happened on my graduation day. i waited the whole day, hoping he'd appear in the midst of the crowd. when he didn't, i held onto the possibility of seeing him by the gates. but that didn't happen either. my last hope was maybe he'd send me a single message, but by the end of the day, nothing came. then i went on instagram and saw a photo – a warning, i guess. a warning that i should just stop hoping. that… happened a few weeks later, i think. or maybe it was just a few days after our argument, the one where he told me he couldn't love… yeah."

you met his gaze and once again, his face was serious. his eyes were furrowed and his mouth was slightly open. a few moments passed, and he let out a shaky breath. screw it, you thought, it's out there now and i don't care anymore.

your silent exchange was interrupted as he shifted the camera away. confusion clouded your thoughts as you watched him move. he turned back to you, his expression still serious, and then he grabbed a chair from the nearby table. he sat down with his back facing you.

the room felt charged with unspoken emotions, leaving you to question his intentions and actions. it was as if he was peeling away layers, searching for something beneath the surface.

"did you know that…" he began, his voice breaking the silence. "she was his sister?"

"i never told you about her, that's on me," he admitted with a chuckle. "that was her last day, y/n. so i decided to spend the entire day with her. i'm sorry."

you were taken aback. "i'm sorry–"

"it's okay, y/n."

"i know i left you with so many questions that night, but let me tell you… every effort you made, every cookie you baked, i cherished all of it. i loved you. i'm sorry if my actions made you doubt yourself."

another pause filled the air.

"i left when you left."

"you were my dream. architecture wasn't really my passion, you know? i was struggling a lot, but luckily, you were there with me. i decided to chase after what i truly loved when you left, because i realized if i wanted you back in my life, it should be when i'm at my best, right? i wasn't lying when i said i couldn't love. i didn't want to love you when i was broken. i wanted to be the best version of myself for you. i thought that if i wanted you to be with the best person, then that should be me. so i became that person, a director, and then i planned all of this." his eyes finally met yours.

"i was always looking at you."

tears welled up in your eyes, and he seemed to notice. he took a step towards you and enveloped you in his arms.

"i'm sorry for not holding onto you back then, baby. but i promise, i won't let go of you now," he whispered.

"i'm sorry for leaving, jaemin," you sobbed.

"shh, you did what you thought was right."

"do you want to have lunch with me now?" he asked.

a mixture of emotions flooded your heart, and with a nod, you replied, "yes, jaemin."

[unholywriters]

Golden Trap Teaser

Sumnary: Finding a place to run away from the loud city is often harder then some would think. You could wonder into the woods for hours, far from the loud sound of cars blaring horns, people walking on their phones, the sound of machines constantly beeping and the pressure to seem a certain way and being heard can often be crushing to someone’s breaking point. But why is there a large, beautifully hidden castle tucked far in the woods? Was someone in a dark cloak walking to the large heavy doors and closing them? But most importantly, why did it look like he was staring at you before closing the doors? Wanting to bring you inside?

Tags: Vampire Yunho, curious male reader, unprotected sex (wrap it up guys anything always practice safe sex), classic Yunho, modern reader, non-idol AU, vampire AU

Genre: Smut, minors do not interact

All I ever wanted to was yo go outside and enjoy myself, walking in the forest is like opening a window to the soft damp air that fills the air first thing in the morning while the sun slowly rises. Feeling the flowers softly graze your shoes, the overgrown grass and weeds tapping your body and the leaves covering the sun to make it less bright, but of course the sun is almost always peaking through them just to trying to help the plans grows and just overall it’s a peaceful experience when you can truly enjoy yourself without having to worry about anything else. It can also help after work, those who enjoy their jobs and can actually just go in and make fun. Working in customer services is almost like having your soul slowly taken out of your body and watching it being slapped around and yelled at, but all you can do is smile and try to walk them through their confusion just for them to cuss you out thinking that they managed to bring you down. Or when you have to deal with that or couple of employees who just truly love their high horse too much and don’t think they need to come down and just relax.

But today I wanted to walk a little further then I usually do, since I was able to get off of work early, which is known to like rare in the cases of customer services because there’s always way too many people trying to into your place of work and create a rush, which is annoying but people need things, and I need a mental break form the males trying to either start a fight because they manage to stumble in when e run out of teh drinks they want, or when you ho into the bathroom and they just left shit on the actual toilet seat and not inside of the bowl. Which you’d think that people wouldn’t actually do but surprise surprise, they do and it’s shitty to have to go and clean it up but someone has to. And it’s annoying but it can be done. But there’s just something peaceful about the woods, when you’re in a safe area and can know that you can actually relax before having to go back into the loud city and be annoyed about everything. While also trying to find the little good in things around us, like playing music, baking and cooking or truly whatever people can afford to do anything in that matter.

I was happy to be out here, trying to relax myself while looking at all the wild flowers growing, the bushes growing and just nature trying to live as itself. I was happily looking around before I noticed a little archway, it wears kinda weird to be honest, the branches were twirling around each other with red petals growing on it. Making a little pathway deeper, all I could do was stare at it like I was attracted to it. I almost tried to walk into it but I knew I had to get going, the sun is still out but it’s starting to set and I still need to go home and shower. I was about to try and turn away before I saw a pair of eyes within the trees. I found myself stuck, because by the looks of it, the eyes were in the pathway, peaking through the mess of tress growing out and twirling around each other to create such a thing. I know those were eyes, but they didn’t nearly look like eyes. I was almost about to call out to the person, but it was like as soon as I started to open my mouth, he was gone. I expected to hear something as I watched his eyes vanished. But I heard nothing, not the twigs breaking, not the sound of him leaving nor did I even see anything else.

I wanted to question, part of me truly did but knew that if I did something would’ve happened, I wanted to know what but he was gone before I could do anything about it. So I just shook my head and began to walk out of the forest. I was trying to be quiet and look around, curious to see if I would see who’s as there, but there was nothing. Maybe I was just too curious and thinking I had seen someone’s eyes, but who knows. Maybe I can come by later and see something happening again. But what was it when I started to leave and turned the corner, I swear a saw someone in a cloak looking at me from where I had just left, and I could see red….

[destinyc1020]

Tomdaya checkpoint🛂

💔who broke it off? what was the reason?

❤️who reached out first the second time?

💍engaged/ secretly married?

📸fav pic?

💎fav piece of tomdaya jewellery?

💊do you believe in the plan b tea?

🧢thoughts on Zendaya’s haaat story and the live?

💭what was tom thinking about when he talked about the most important experience in your life that has shaped you into the person you are today, if you could say one?

🍞did Z manage to taste granny Tess’s bread by now?

❌unpopular opinion

LOL is this a Q&A thing anon, or something you want me to make a poll out of? I can't tell lol 😅

Anyway...I'll just answer to the best of my ability....

💔who broke it off? what was the reason? - I have no clue, but if I had to guess, I would say Tom did. 🤷🏾‍♀️ Could have been for a number of reasons. Maybe they were also busy and not able to see each other as much? Could be the H/L/D/DC was getting a bit tiresome? Maybe they were just young and needed time to grow, maybe date other people as well?

❤️who reached out first the second time? - I would say Tom did. Especially since he was the one (I suspect) broke things off with her. Plus, we all suspect he reached out for her when she got her Emmy nod.

💍engaged/ secretly married? - Oof...that's a tough one. I'll say... engarried. LOL 😅

📸fav pic? - Oooof! This is another tough one anon! Gosh! Are you trying to kill me?? Anyway, as crazy as this sounds, this is actually one of my favorite Tomdaya pics. They just look so peaceful together, you can literally sense the love and friendship btwn them just through a silhouette, they look like they will be like this when they're old in their 80s together lol...aaaannnd lastly, it's just a GREAT photography piece! 😊(I do photography)

💎fav piece of tomdaya jewellery? - The piaget necklace... For many reasons lol 😅

💊do you believe in the plan b tea? - Yea.... I do lol 😅

🧢thoughts on Zendaya’s haaat story and the live? - I think I posted my thoughts about this already? 🤔

💭what was tom thinking about when he talked about the most important experience in your life that has shaped you into the person you are today, if you could say one? - No clue Anon lol! You might have to ask Tom that lol. But it obviously involved Z cuz he said so. 🥰

🍞did Z manage to taste granny Tess’s bread by now? - Let's hope!! 😅

❌unpopular opinion - I think fans need to chill about Tomdaya and just let life happen the way it's meant to happen. 👀 I think the constant concern, anxiety, tracking of whereabouts, and FBI detective work is a bit overkill these days in 2024. 😭 We know they're together, we know they're madly in love w/each other, and we can't control the past, present, or future, so let's just enjoy the ride with them....regardless of if they stay together, or break up one day. 😊

[needle-noggins]

Volume 7 destroyed me. Part 1 of whatever this analysis is. Lots of talk about childhood trauma. Vash is such a complex character so if there are inconsistencies in my logic here, help me.

So in Volume 7, we get some pretty heavy flashbacks to Vash and Knives' shared trauma of discovering Tesla, and it's juxtaposed with Vash meeting up with Knives in the ark, contrasting then and now. Highlighting how they've changed and developed in response to their shared trauma - which is to say, in opposite ways. And not necessarily just due to their personalities. In fact, I would say that Knives is more sensitive, sweet, and trusting pre-Tesla. Vash is a bit more aloof, although still a good kid.

Also, here's the lily.

White flowers are a common Japanese symbol for death/grief and are primarily used in funerals. Lilies can symbolize purity and innocence (don't quote me on this one though). Rem must have put that flower there and kept it alive. She does say that she opposed the experimentation and regrets Tesla's suffering and death, but this drives the point home in a way that also highlights Rem's character and her love for flowers (which, tbh, seems more of a Tristamp thing I think? Regardless, I hope the next season of Stampede has more Tesla flashbacks with the white lily. That would be a nice nod to the manga).

Back to Tesla trauma. God, it makes me sick. The cold, detached way in which she's described as the "subject" hits home for me because I have to write like that for a living working in healthcare. It's commonplace and required, but man, it's terrifying reading it and understanding that there's 0 compassion in there. Medical ethics (or lack thereof) are my kryptonite. It gets me every time.

To make things worse, it's gory in it's own sterile way. Tesla's body is contained in nice little tanks, but if you look into those tanks... oof. She's riddled with tumors, organs are near-indistinguishable, and her small little child legs make it all the more horrifying. That's a child. With a detached, tiny baby angel arm in another tank. It may be important to note that this is reminiscent of Vash's angel arm (it's the right arm) but also it's the arm that's detached (well, both of Tesla's are, but this one was likely removed first and by Dr. Conrad and the team). Foreshadowing, in a weird way? And Tesla's entire brain is in another tank, with her eye. At what point did this happen? Was she still conscious for that? I want to scream.

Vash is not handling this well. He's the first to cry out about the differences between plants and humans. Also, the composition of that last panel here is incredible - the emotion is palpable. And the eyes?? Eyes of all the humans, watching them as they sleep in the ship, waiting to pounch, or Tesla's eyes, watching from the tank, casting judgement down? Either way, it's evocative. Poor baby Vash. He is so so angry and so scared.

Knives, meanwhile, shatters so badly that he blocks it out and/or represses it without showing a single emotion - as a defense mechanism. This certainly seems more like a Vash-style response, right?

Do remember that these boys are twins. Despite all their differences that have baked in as adults now, they were much more similar as kids. The specific circumstances in their experience immediately post-Tesla then shape them for the rest of their lives and cause the rift between them that we see today (in the same volume, no less). It's nothing but pure tragedy.

Which then brings us to the next scene - Vash, even at such a young age, is already showing tendencies of self-harm and suicidal ideation. He's refusing to eat, wasting away. He'd rather die than live long enough to become another experiment, to be subjected to that torture. There is no safe place for him in this world of humans, and Knives is refusing to acknowledge it (he's literally asleep during this; we love an avoidant king - jk but i'm handshaking w/ Knives; relatable). Rem, bless her, tries to treat Vash to some freshly-cut fruit (also a symbol of familial love in Japan - acts of service and all) but ya know, she forgets the cardinal rule when handling someone who is suicidal - don't let them have access to sharp objects. No knives for you, Vash.

BIG MOM MOMENT. Rem grabs the sharp edge of the blade and lets it cut her to prevent Vash from harming himself. She may not have birthed these boys, but damn if she isn't their mother in every other way. (also, quick point - generational trauma - Rem's grief over Alex's death becomes Vash's grief over Rem's death? I don't have good formed thoughts on this yet).

UGH. The flip side of Rem's blank ticket philosophy - the future is blank, so why throw the present away? There's always, always hope. Isn't that just the overarching message of Trigun?

This is obviously a formative moment for Vash. He never forgets this lesson.

Caveat to this, Vash is still a very self-destructive character as an adult, verging on suicidal without being outrightly so. He has let this moment shape his character, but he still others himself in that he believes this philosophy doesn't apply to him, an Independent. Vash has said before that there's no hope for him, he wishes he had never been born, and he's only really alive to destroy Knives and finish what they started. That's uh, Not Good... what will make Vash want to finally live? (*shhhhh, spoilers!*) Anyway, Vash applies this lesson to Wolfwood in Wolfwood's weakest moment. Vash sees himself in Wolfwood in the "Shoot" moment, no doubt, he sees his fear and anger, even if it's a bit of a different flavor. Wolfwood is simultaneously suicidal in that moment and has this twisted logic of, If Vash can kill me he can kill anyone; this will help him and i'm willing to die for that cause.

Someone tell me their thoughts on this parallel. I kinda just want to scream incoherently about it. That's all I got.

Anyway.

It takes some extra learning in this moment before Vash can figure his shit out. He takes the situation from bad to worse - he's still angry at humans for his pain, still terrified. He's so angry that he stabs Rem - his mother figure, the only person other than Knives that he's ever known and trusted - and instantly regrets it, terrified that he'll lose her (before his worst fears are later realized, and he does and it's his fault, again).

It's like, you know, the feeling when you hurt your sibling because you're so fucking mad at them, but the moment they're actually hurt, you're instantly filled with fear and regret? (THIS WILL COME INTO PLAY LATER TOO I PROMISE.)

I can imagine it's 10 times worse with a parent.

And Knives is asleep! For all of this! I think the one big takeaway with the twins is that Vash has always been the more outwardly emotional one, and Knives has always been more sensitive but withdrawn. Vash expresses his anger outwardly, getting it out quickly, even if it's very destructive in the moment. But this moment teaches him to do otherwise - he sees the result of his anger, and he's terrified out of doing anything to cause harm ever again. Vash tries to kill Rem! Vash, who now wouldn't hurt a soul, even if he wants to! He's terrified of the consequences, and with the added idolization of Rem's memory... yeah. So as an adult, Vash turns away from "flight" and into "fawn" as his main trauma response. He just wants to make things right and he's willing to break a hundred times for it so no one else has to get hurt. (he's also very much a "flight" still, but ya know)

Knives sits back, represses, plots until his emotions have twisted beyond recognition and his resulting actions are a hundred times more irrational and fucked up. Very much "fight". And it's even more terrifying, actually.

When Knives wakes up, he's calm. He's collected. He says he doesn't remember what happened. He's plotting to doom the whole SEEDS project. He's going to kill them all, and he's not showing a single emotion until he's gleefully realized his plan is working. That's horrifying.

I think this is where I'll stop for now. I'm not a therapist or psychiatrist or expert in trauma in any way and this post is quickly running away from me and into a psychoanalysis of the twins, which I just don't feel equipped to do here, never mind have the right words for. But at least this can get a conversation started.