#which is kinda fitting to their relationship post the 60s

[crepegosette]

your brusa art just makes me think about these two dumbos arguing about who invented the damn airplane (ps: he would gaslight her so bad, it would be hysterical)

BrUSA isn't a good ship and that's what makes it good™

[clatterbane]

I've got an unexpected relatively short notice 9 a.m. blood pressure appointment at the nearby primary care center that I've only been in once for a blood draw. And I swear thinking about it tonight can't be doing my blood pressure any good.

Still not sure what's up with that, but I guess we'll find out soon enough. Whether I want to or not. Endocrinology was handling it, so I really have no idea why primary care is summoning me now. Maybe it has to do with my last endo leaving so I got reassigned to another one in the clinic, but idk.

My blood pressure always ran sort of low (like, 100/60 was on the high side for me before), classic EDS dysautonomia style. I had to watch out for medications that would incidentally affect blood pressure, unless I wanted to almost black out when I stood up and/or get fluid painfully swelling my feet up. Both of which did happen over the years.

But after that 2nd round of COVID which also left me with the fatigue, it went kinda fucky too. I suspect it may be connected to the pounding heart I've been getting more often too, but I really haven't wanted to get into that--especially because it does seem to be post-COVID bullshit. Don't know if they're more likely to dismiss it as all in my head, or freak the fuck out in unpleasant ways because cardiovascular symptoms. Don't particularly feel up to dealing with either possibility just now.

So yeah, I apparently really do need blood pressure meds these days, unexpected as it was. (As much as it concerns me, with some of the repeated "unusual ethnic liver chemistry-> unusual drug reactions/effects which too often get dismissed until you're in terrible shape" fits I watched my mom go through with BP meds for years. Mine is the same, we kept reacting in similar unexpected ways--and I am basically an ethnic minority of one, this far from home. 😒)

And somebody does need to follow up on that. But, it would be nice to have some continuity of care here, and more idea of wtf is even going on. Sudden last minute summons letters from a medical practice I have no prior relationship with do not increase my confidence in any of this.

It's also feeling too reminiscent of dealing with the freaking NHS, where the rest of it was amplified by getting treated like mushroom as SOP.

[noogit9000]

Not sure how many tcw songs you've heard but I saw ur post asking for recommendations so here's some of my favs

Little soldiers: I've never been more insane about a song than this song ever. I cant. I cannot. This. This song. I'm so normal about this I swear. Go listen to it if you've haven't

Easier: This one's another one of my favourite of all times. Very sweet and kinda sad. Love it to pieces

Take me to war: !!!! Loved this one even from the first time listening. Songs that make you wanna tear something up. Chew on the furniture. Very funny trivia is that this song is supposingly about arguing with people on the internet despite sounding like it fits a feral fairie biting at god better

Tongues and teeth: Pretty sure if you've done any amount of exploring for ctw songs you've probs heard of this one but it Is Good. Like maybe a bit overrated but you cannot deny it's a good song

And some more obscure songs if you wanna dig a little further

Sleeping giants: songs that make you wanna go barefoot and sprint through the woods at night while howling. Wonderful song. Fell in love the first time hearing it

Rockslide: I like to think of this song as Sleeping Giants's slightly more energetic sister. If rockslide was the hyped-up start of a midnight hunt then sleeping giants would be the victorious whoops as you sprint down the hills with your prize in tow. Do not seperate them.

Strangler fig: okay maybe I just like this song cause it hits a little too close to home but it's also an earworm. Something something to be bitter about being used up or being taken advantage of. Cursing those who have taken you for granted

Ancient history: MY GOD THIS ONE IS GOOD. GOOD GOOD SHIT. WONDERFUL SONG. it's short but so so good. Everyone should listen to this song at least once if not only for that one line "my body's aching like a knock-down drag-out"

Volta: it took me a while to find this song but!!!! It's a very good and sweet song. Something very comforting and happy, which is rare for tcw songs considering how roughly 60% of their songs have something to do with unhappy relationships and the other 30% is just Feral Fae Vibes™

It's a bit of a long list ahaha ^^; but I hope you enjoy the songs!!!!! I'm holding back even more highly recommend songs cause if I named them all we'd be here forever but!!!! If you're interested in more I'm always happy to shoot you another ask with more recommendations :DDD enjoy listening!

I’ve never listened to the Crane Wives before now so I went in blind;

Excellent recommendations, I’d love some more since you mentioned you have more >:]

I haven’t really listened to a lot of the indie folk genre but I’m getting Hades Town/Wolfwalkers vibes and I love it.

I want to go run around in the woods

Delicious

Thank you Anon <3

[nimuetheseawitch]

for character headcanons: klinger and margaret

Klinger

1: sexuality headcanon 

Flexible. Hard to label because his gender is hard to label/he doesn't canonically seem to claim anything other than cishet. But I 100% see him as someone who says he's a straight man and then enjoys being a woman and will also totally have relationships/sex with men. He doesn't care about coloring in the lines of any chosen label.

2: otp 

I can't help it, I love canon for this. Soon Lee is perfect for him and I just died when she said she wanted to see him in a dress sometime. I also love to imagine that he and Henry hooked up before the war.

3: brotp 

Mulcahy. They gamble together, they both have black market connections, and they care about a lot of the same things in some really sweet ways. I love it when we see them team up on things, and I love their interactions in church and gambling in backrooms. They deeply respect each other and their differences and I love that.

4: notp 

Winchester. My apologies to those who love this, but Charles has often done wrong by Klinger, and it's just a no for me.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head 

Post-war tailor shop that secretly serves the queer community. Who else in Toledo knows how to tailor women's clothes to masculine bodies?

6: one way in which I relate to this character

I would also trade away my favorite salami for an incredibly personal gift for a friend and then take zero credit for it (it would embarrass me to be acknowledged).

7: thing that gives me secondhand embarrassment about this character

I don't think anything Klinger does embarrasses me. I'm furious about some things on his behalf, like how everyone treats him when he decorates, but I can't think of any embarrassment.

8: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?

Cinnamon roll all the way through.

Margaret

1: sexuality headcanon 

This is fun because I recently changed my mind. I now hc her as aromantic. I always thought of her as bi/queer, but I've been thinking a lot recently about the possibility of her being aromantic and how that intersects with her perception of her gender and related expectations. The happiest liaison she has is the carefree one night stand after her divorce where she really embraces her freedom to not worry about all the trappings of romance. She tries so hard to fit into this box of the woman who needs a man and marriage, and we see her fumble with this idealistic romance after sleeping with Hawkeye and with Scully. We also see her really happy when eschewing traditional gender roles with Frank, and although she keeps asking him for romance, it either goes horribly wrong or seems to really be about sex and not much more. I don't know, I got rambly, but I like my new headcanon.

2: otp 

Herself. I know this is kind of cheating, but I kinda want Margaret to be single and become part of the 60s free love thing. Eschewing marriage and boxes and embracing bodily autonomy seems right up her alley, and I want her to find happiness without being tied to any one person. I want her to love herself.

3: brotp 

Hawkeye. They are the best besties and should be best friends forever. I want Margaret and Hawkeye to get together and gossip about their various sexual escapades and scheme together to set up an illegal abortion clinic.

4: notp 

Power imbalances in either direction. This isn't one specific person but more about her characterization of someone who sleeps with generals. I am incredibly creeped out by the implication that some of them are her father's friends. I also think she wouldn't sleep with someone who she commands because she'd be uncomfortable with the power imbalance (she makes a comment at some point about how she's dating Frank because he's a Major) - she already struggles to even be friends with those she commands.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head 

She has 100% explored her sexuality with both Lorraine and Helen.

6: one way in which I relate to this character

All of those feelings about expectations - from the expectations of her parents to behaving professionally to gender.

7: thing that gives me secondhand embarrassment about this character

The shrieking over Radar waking her up and other similar things. She's so quick to assume he's a creep and doesn't give him the benefit of the doubt (tbf, he does peek in the nurses' shower, but he pretty much always treats her with respect).

8: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?

*sigh* I want her to be a cinnamon roll (and by the end she's pretty much there), but she definitely starts out as problematic. She has so much character growth, and I love her.

[fatuifucker]

Might I request for your event Xiao eating out a sub afab reader, who's kinda shy abt their looks and a bit insecure since it's their first time? With the prompts 4, 47 and 60? If you don't mind with a lil bit praise kink?

It you're not comfortable with that, feel free to ignore this. Dw :)

service top xiao x sub fem-bodied reader (mentions of a bra)

SUMMARY = (modern au) prompt - "you look just about good enough to eat" + "are you holding back? don't" + "come for me, you've done so well"

WARNINGS = smut, use of the word "cunt", oral (reader receiving), kinda ooc xiao but shh this is a modern au it's fine, shy and insecure reader, reader wears feminine lingerie, praise, use of "xiaoniao" as petname (meaning little bird in chinese), brief discussion of safe word and aftercare bc we love safe and healthy fun times, it's never mentioned but xiao has done it before which is why he kinda good at it bc yknow virgin xiao wouldn't know how to eat badussy

W/C = 1.2k

A/N = lightning may be transient but my love for you will always be eternal /p can yall tell i'm shitty with deadlines this was meant to be posted on vday lol 🤡

Today is the day you finally give Xiao your virginity.

After months and months of careful consideration, another month of planning and having “the talk” with your close friend, Venti, you realise that you are ready for the next phase of your relationship.

This will be his Valentine’s Day gift.

Siting silently on the bed, twiddling your thumbs as you await for his return. Did you prepare everything? Condoms, lube and water on the nightstand, curtains have been drawn, you have already taken the necessarily contraceptives…wait, is your hair okay? Standing up, you trotted over to the mirror. The person in front of you is…different from the normal you. First of all, never would you have thought to wear such revealing attire. In fact, Venti was the one who concocted this master plan.

In his mind, he thought that since you were apprehensive about baring your bare body to Xiao, why not wear something that would cover you up while also making you look alluring? You suspect it was more about Venti wanting to show off his new skills since he had recently taken up fashion design as a hobby. Nonetheless, you had accepted his offer (he didn’t give you a chance to reject him) and here you are.

Although he told you that it was just a simple hobby, this quality is surprisingly sublime. Everything was hand-tailored by him and the fabric felt fine against your skin. Black was his colour of choice. Classy. It shows the right amount of skin to appear raunchy while also bearing in mind your modesty. Aware of your abhorrence towards tight-fitted clothes, he had chosen a more flowy and light design. The bra, held together by ribbons around your back and neck, incorporated elements of a sheer apron reaching down to your waist, the floral stitching barely concealing your nipples. Naturally, the panties — more like g-string — sports a matching design at the front with a cute little slit in the middle for easy access. And because he, in his own words, ‘is such a nice friend’, he included a sheer black robe to cover yourself just in case. Initially, you didn’t think it would help at all but in the present moment, you think that the robe is the sole reason you haven’t abandoned this idea. Maybe you should. It isn’t too late right?

In the midst of adjusting that same strand of hair for the nth time, you hear the sound of keys and footsteps heading your way. Shit, you didn’t even hear him locking the door! Snatching the tube of lip balm from the vanity table, you hastily apply an uneven coat before flinging the tube back on the table. Running back to the bed, no concern about the obvious thud as a result of your careless action, no concern about the fact that Xiao obviously heard it. No, you need to return to follow the plan. You have spent so much effort preparing, you are not going to let it go to waste.

The door to your shared room creaks open. Your heart races, feeling his fearsome eyes scan your half-nude body. You dare not lift your gaze, finding the patterns on the floor to be a much more interesting sight. Footsteps escalate in volume until you can sense the man you love towering over you. Your throat tightens as you feel your saliva travel down your throat yet your mouth still is as dry as ever.

“Why are you wearing something so revealing?” Xiao’s question cuts through the uncomfortable silence like a sharpened knife. “You shouldn’t wear something like that in front of me.”

Confused, you finally lift up your head to look at Xiao, only for him to spin his head around to the side. Strands of his dark picturesque hair cascades over his handsome face, but they don’t hide the dark tint of red blooming at the tips of his ears.

“Why not? You’re my boyfriend.”

“I am, but…it’s difficult to restrain myself when you look so…” Xiao swallows as he eyes your frame. “I would never do anything that you aren’t ready for but…when you look so alluring I…I still have to relieve myself somehow…”

He mumbles the last part out, using his hand to muffle himself. You tilt you head before giggling.

“Are you implying that you’ve masturbated to me?”

God, that look in his eyes is priceless. You laugh, your hand grasping onto Xiao’s wrist.

“It’s okay, you don’t need to ashamed.”

He calms down with your reassurance. Your hands guide him to the bed, guiding his lips to yours and allowing both of you to get lost in the mutual love and lust for each other. The heat of the moment causes your robe to slide off your shoulders. Xiao’s calloused palms trail down your body — past your collarbone, past your tits, past your waist — and resting at your hip.

“Xiaoniao…” he pants, biting your lower lip. “You look just about good enough to eat.”

“Then do as your please.” You shyly smile. “I’m your Valentine’s Day present.”

“Are you sure you want this?”

“I want it so bad, Xiao.”

He gets on his knees, peppering your body with kisses before reaching his destination. He makes a satisfied “hm” — likely impressed by convenience of the slit in the middle of your underwear — before his fingers push your hood back to reveal your clit.

“If you need me to stop, say the word ‘tofu’ and I'll stop at once. Understood?”

As soon as you nod, his tongue latches onto your bub, licking circles around the little nub. You jolt back at the unfamiliar sensation, already screaming his name as your nails dig into the sheets. He groans as he licks a strip up your pussy, before slipping the wet muscle inside. It burns with heat. It’s warm and hot and soft and makes him crave for more. He slurps and slurps, his fingers going back to rub your neglected clit. Your pussy still feels snug and tight but it’s dripping. It’s dripping with your fluids and it’s all for him. He accepts what you have to offer, drinking and drinking more of you and savouring your delicious taste.

“X-Xiao! Mmm! Xiao, it feels good! It f-feels– o-oh!”

Your body is quivering. You’re overwhelmed but you don’t want it to end. It’s your first time and he has already made a mess out of you. Biting your lip, clenching onto the sheets, doing anything to try to restrain yourself from cumming too early.

“Are you holding back, [Name]? Don’t. Let yourself go,” Xiao whispers as he continues eating you out.

“Xiao, I’m really– mmm! C-close!”

“Cum for me, xiaoniao,” he moans, the vibrations making your toes curl. “You’ve done so well.”

Your mouth forms into an ‘o’ as you release, your cunt and clit throbbing around his tongue as your body goes limp against the bed. Xiao laps up the rest of your juices, the lewd slurping voices sending your brain into a dizzy daze. 

“Was that good? Did I overdo it?” Xiao’s voice softly asks.

You shake your head.

“No, it’s just…I’m not used to it,” you laugh sheepishly as you push yourself up. “But it felt amazing.”

Xiao plants a kiss on your forehead before getting you the glass of water on the nightstand.

“I’m happy to hear that, [Name].”

[freezing82]

Just watched Riverdale. Well, what can I say? I kinda liked it?! Yeah. Because it was completely weird and surreal. And I want to know how they'll extricate themselves from this mess. Everybody, except maybe Cheryl was OOC (we all know she's been nurturing her dark side, no surprise there). Shout out to Madelain Petsch, because she is a m a z i n g. And by OOC I don't mean just Out Of Character, but also Out of Control.

A re-watch is in order, but I don't know when I'll have the time, so for now, my thoughts on the premiere are under the cut, so that this post isn't kilometers long and I can protect as many people from spoilers (even if I'm using the tags, I care about my fellas in the fandom, k?). I'll reblog with additions if needed.

I should probably start from the beginning.

Jughead as Rod Serling was phenomenal. I never watched the 60s TWZ, but I've seen clips in the past and I can say Cole was amazing. Maybe that wasn't original, but this was a way to keep him as the narrator and pay an homage to one of the most famous sci-fi productions ever made. Was it a bit unsettling having Jug talking to the camera? Yes. But also new and intriguing. Also, the scene where he presents Betty & Archie to the audience is hylarious. He basically cockblocked them with the power of thought.

Before I delve into the madness of the new ships, I have an annoucement to make: VEGINALD is an abomination of a name for a ship. I don't want to hear it ever again. Thank you. RONALD would sound better LOL But we'll stick to Veggie.

Considering the hype RAS tried to fuel up for this premiere, I have to say I wasn't shocked that much. There were a few watered-down 'horror' scenes, it's the CW, it's not like they could do much more than that. I liked the concept of the whole town being magically bribed into this gory ritual. Archie VS Rivervale was hylarious! And Veronica delivering the blow who knocked Archie out was priceless! Almost as much as the delirious expression on Betty's face when she confesses she's carrying a son that will be the new Maple King in 25 years time (and most definitely killed as well). I loved that "The wicker man" reference. So fitting! To the risk of souding like a damn broken record, I have to reiterate how unsettling it is for a 25 year old man to SLEEP in his childhood room with his girlfriend, so that unkle Frank can take the master bedroom, with Alice Cooper in it (Fralice is a big NO for me, alright?). I'm sorry for both of their losses but let's just not put them together just because they're miserable alone? That's not a healthy way to portray a grown-up relationship. Alice, the woman who lost TWO children in the span of a few months: * Polly, who was kidnapped, tortured, murdered and discarded like a broken doll in the trunk of a car in the middle of a junkyard, and * Charles was serial killer and a convict, and Alice shot him for self defence and to protect Betty, but he was her son all the same. Nobody is going to make me believe she's recovered from that whole situation and is now ready to jump into a romantic relationship with a man who's had his fair share of tragedy and hasn't recovered. For what we know, maybe Polly and Charles don't even exist in this alternate dimension, we don't have enough information.

Let's get to BA, so I can be done with it. First of all...they didn't get the couch stripping scene which was in the trailer, too bad, so sad. They did get the 'I love you' and a few of the most bloodcurdling lines ever spoken by a character in a TV show in the hystory of tv, though. Betty saying over and over that she' SO READY to have Archie's baby seems to me more of a way to convince herself. She's the woman who has been suppressing a gigantic trauma for almost a year, in the main dimension which is Riverdale, remember? There's no way she's in the right mindset to make such a life-changing decision like having a child. So the only way to have her go all 'knock me out right now, Archibald' was to put them in an AU! Side (not so side) note: Archie being a complete ass about adoption? What.a.man. I mean, to be fair, Betty didn't give him a full disclosure about her motivation but his reply sounded a lot like 'my seed would make a better baby than the one we could ever adopt'. And yet again, insisted on having a child. Shame on you, Archie, you're an ass. Please STOP comparing yourself to the dearly departed Fred. Also a shoutout at how Mary Andrews (although not pictured) was used to put pressure on Betty.

Alex from RVD After Dark said there would be an explanation for Betty's desire for maternity. There was none, pre-ritual Betty reiterated that she's in her twenties, she doesn't NEED to become a mother right away. But let's stomp on her free will and have Archie put pressun on her, will ya?

Apparently many more young and supposedly fertile women in RiverVale can't get pregnant, so why don't we make a sacrifice and flood the earth with the blood and guts of the sacrifical lamb (or dear)? My God, he should have known something was off when Betty said he couldn't skip the pie. She said 'NO' in a way that actually gave me chills. As always, praise to Lili Reinhart and her incredible talent. It must have been difficult to switch from 'normal' Betty to this pod person we've been seeing in the last episodes of S5, in this premiere and are probably going to see for the rest of this mini-event. But she was so good. So good.

Archie has been sacrificed and Betty is pregnant, now what? I just hope they don't make Jug time-travel to save Archibald's sorry ass. But at this point that's excatly what I think is gonna happen in ep 6x05. It's the most basic of speculations, of course, but it's not like Riverdale can go on withiut one of his core 4, right? The audience (which does NOT include me, btw) would revolt and send death threats to RAS. Oh, no, that already happened: BA stans are saying he'd better explore BA relationship in depth 'or else'. Anyhoo, am I worried that BA is gonna last once we go back to Riverdale? Not so much. Am I worried that they're gonna bring Betty's pregnancy to Riverdale? No. I don't thing the writers can pull that off in a believable and reasonable way. Riverdale's Betty has serious menthal health issues, she can't worry about becoming a mother, too. Baby Anthony is enough to deal with, I don't think the show needs another kid for now.

What can I say about Jabitha? They didn't even kiss ONCE! LOL They could have, there was plenty of 'alone' time on screen for them to share a smooch, but they didn't.

Chemistry is nonexistent, you guys. There's really nothing more to say about them. I don't hate the ship, but I can't bring myself to like it. People who like Jabitha are either die-hard Jughead stans who hold a grudge against Betty or BA stans who see this as an opportunity to keep Jug out of Betty's orbit. I like Tabitha, but the only vibe I get whenever I look at Erinn and Cole sharing a scene is a potentially great friendship. Which I'm hoping the writers can pull off without too much drama. Utopy, I know. Tabitha could be a supportive, loving friend for Jug and Lord knows if he doesn't need that. But they don't know each other or understand each other deeply enough to become a stable couple. The only time Tabitha got a glimpse of the real Jughead (the one who asked her to cook maple mushrooms and babysit him while he was tripping) she fled. Yes, they are apparently sleeping in the same bed, which is odd considering they don't look at each other like they wanna jump their bones every two seconds, but alas. That apartment is haunted and they should move out asap, anyway. Spiders? Didn't I manifest Jug killing a spider? I believe I did.

Speaking of Jughead...if people needed any more proof that this is an AU: Jughead lost a pancake-eating competition! Jughead failing at anything regarding food? That could never happen in the real world ahah (He also said 'I love you' to Archie, instead of punching him right in the snout, but that's another story, for anither day.)

[cowardnthief]

Alright, I am curious. Why is Jonny Cade queercoded and what queer subtext was there in their relationship with Ponyboys? 👀

TW: mentions of abuse, violence, death, murder

also spoilers for the outsiders!! (i mean it is a 60 year old book, but still)

-------

OOH OKAY OKAY

(In all honesty, I could probably do a whole essay on this, but I'll keep it brief-ish.)

Bit of background on The Outsiders: It's a book written in the early 60s that focuses on the class divide between the rich Socs (Socials) and the working-class greasers (like, "hoods", criminals), or rather the people within each of those groups who don't feel like they fit into the binary.

Ponyboy is the protagonist of the novel. He and Johnny are both greasers and part of a gang with a few others, including Ponyboy's two older brothers and three other boys.

Let's start with Johnny. Johnny is extremely queer-coded in his own right. He's described early on as timid, shy, weak and maybe a little feminine. He's seen as the gang's "pet" and the youngest, despite being sixteen to Ponyboy's fourteen. His friends are very fond and protective of him. A lot of this behaviour comes from his trauma, being abused by his parents as well as beaten nearly to death by a Soc named Bob. However, it also falls into an archetype of stereotypical queer characters. Writing male characters in this way is a way of subtly telling an audience that they are queer. This probably wasn't done intentionally, but should be kept in mind.

Johnny's character development involves him becoming more masculine, almost. The final important act he does in the book is save children from a burning building. Ponyboy comments on the fact that he seemed braver, louder etc in that moment, all traits associated with masculinity, which is 1) a strange reaction to the situation, especially for Johnny, and 2) exactly the kind of narrative standpoint one would take to show that femininity (or queerness) is bad.

Now for Ponyboy - his queer-coding is more subtle at times, and a little different. He isn't timid or shy or scared or feminine like Johnny. (However, he does once say that he "didn't care too much for girls yet", but that his brother said he would grow out of it. This is particularly strange, considering he is fourteen already.) Early on, it's established that he feels like an outsider within his own group. He doesn't really feel like a greaser, or act like one. He likes things that greasers don't like. He watches movies, he reads, he likes to see the sunset. He considers himself different, or "other", and he feels as if he can't talk about it. His friends just wouldn't get it.

A large part of the book, in my opinion, is Ponyboy finding other "outsiders", like Cherry and Johnny. (Cherry being a Soc while Johnny is another greaser.) All three of them talked once, while at a drive-in, Ponyboy finding a particular connection with Cherry despite her not being the only girl there. They all have the same sense of feeling “other”, and not being able to talk about it for fear of being judged.

Now for Johnny and Ponyboy’s relationship, which...oh boy. Some of it is just scenes like this, which feel very queer, outright:

“‘Guess I look okay now, huh, Johnny?’

He was studying me. ‘You know, you look an awful lot like Sodapop, the way you’ve got your hair and everything. I mean, except your eyes are green.’

‘They ain’t green, they’re gray,’ I said, reddening. ‘And I look about as much like Soda as you do.’ I got to my feet. ‘He’s good-looking.’

‘Shoot,’ Johnny said with a grin, ‘you are, too.’”

Not to mention the whole chapter they spend literally just acting like a domestic gay couple while they’re on the run, just the two of them, from the police. There’s also this conversation they have while watching the sunrise in this chapter (which I’ll talk more about later once I get to the symbolism), in which they talk about being outsiders. Here are a few quotes from that:

“‘You know,’ Johnny said slowly, ‘I never noticed colors and clouds and stuff until you kept reminding me about them. It seems like they were never there before.’”

“‘Well, Soda kinda looks like your mother did, but he acts just exactly like your father. And Darry is the spittin' image of your father, but he ain't wild and laughing all the time like he was. He acts like your mother. And you [Ponyboy] don't act like either one.’”

“‘You [Johnny] ain't like any of the gang. I mean, I couldn't tell Two-Bit or Steve or even Darry about the sunrise and clouds and stuff. I couldn't even remember that poem around them. I mean, they just don't dig. Just you and Sodapop. And maybe Cherry Valance.’

Johnny shrugged. ‘Yeah,’ he said with a sigh. ‘I guess we're different.’

‘Shoot,’ I said, blowing a perfect smoke ring, ‘maybe they are.’”

(Honestly, can my whole argument just be that one quote? “I guess we’re different.” // “Shoot. Maybe they are.” Queer stuff, huh?)

Later in the book, when Johnny is in the hospital, Ponyboy stresses again and again that he can’t think about him dying, that he can’t fathom a life without him. Everyone in the group is fond of Johnny, but Ponyboy acts like Johnny’s death would destroy him.

When Johnny is dying, he asks to see Ponyboy. His last words are to Ponyboy, despite Dally also being in the room. One of the other last things he does is write a letter to Ponyboy.

Johnny is also the first person Ponyboy runs to when his older brother hits him early in the book.

When Johnny dies, Ponyboy falls into denial, pretending and convincing himself that Johnny isn’t dead, because he couldn’t handle the grief. He says the reason that he doesn’t go insane with it, like Dally does, is because Johnny isn’t the only thing he loves.

This isn’t nearly all of it, but this post is already long as fuck, and I want to talk about some of the metaphors and symbols too.

Symbol #1: The hair

The is a more obvious one, as the author clearly intended it to be a metaphor, although probably not for something queer. When Johnny and Ponyboy go on the run after Johnny killed a Soc in self-defence, the two of them have to cut off their hair. This is obviously a big deal to them, especially Ponyboy, because they’re proud of their hair - it’s a symbol of the greasers, of rebellion, and it’s one of the last things they have that tie them with their gang back in the city. However, having Johnny and Ponyboy specifically cut off their hair feels like more of a symbol of them severing their ties to the greasers. They feel like outsiders within their own group already, and this is a way of showing that they’re leaving it behind, or starting to. (Shedding symbols of comphet, you know.)

Symbol #2: Sunrises and sunsets

Johnny, Cherry and Ponyboy, three characters who are outsiders within their own community, all spend time watching sunrises or sunsets. It’s one of the things that Ponyboy and Cherry bond over and talk about. Johnny and Ponyboy also watch a sunrise while they’re on the run. It’s a small thing that unites the three of them and becomes almost a symbol of their “otherness”, and thus, queercoding enters the chat. Also, the sunrise that Ponyboy and Johnny watch can symbolise the “beginning” of their relationship, as they start to see each other in a different light. 

Symbol #3: Gone with the Wind

When Johnny and Ponyboy are on the run, Ponyboy buys the book Gone with the Wind from a corner store. They read it together. The book is an idealised story of the southern, free, country life. Johnny makes comments about how the men in the book are charming and gallant and he admires them. The book symbolises both what Ponyboy and Johnny wish they could be, like happy and free and rich (and straight and masculine), and what they are, or what they’re starting to find with each other while in the countryside. When Johnny is in the hospital, he asks for a copy of the book to read. It’s one of his last requests. In my opinion, he asked for it both to remember Ponyboy and to escape to a reality where he wasn’t young and dying, to one where he was still with Ponyboy on the run, or one like in the book where none of this happened at all. The book is integral to their relationship.

Symbol #4: The poem

When Ponyboy and Johnny are watching the sunrise in the church, Ponyboy recites a poem by Robert Frost:

Nature’s first green is gold,

Her hardest hue to hold,

Her early leaf’s a flower,

But only so an hour.

Then leaf subsides to leaf,

And Eden sank to grief.

So dawn goes down to day.

Nothing gold can stay.

At the time, the two of them both say that they don’t understand the poem. When Johnny dies later in the book, his last words to Ponyboy are to “stay gold”. In the letter he wrote for Ponyboy, which Ponyboy reads later, he says that he now understands the poem.

“I’ve been thinking about it, and that poem, that guy that wrote it, he meant you’re gold when you’re a kid, like green. When you’re a kid, everything’s new, dawn. It’s just when you get used to everything that it’s day. Like the way you dig sunsets, Pony. That’s gold. Keep that way, it’s a good way to be.”

Oh boy, there’s a lot to say about this poem.

First of all, the poem symbolises what Ponyboy gave Johnny - a new outlook on life. A lens with which to see more beautiful things. Johnny said that he hadn’t really appreciated sunsets or clouds before Ponyboy pointed them out to him.

Secondly, the meaning of the poem. When you consider Johnny’s interpretation, also taking into account what sunsets and sunrises etc. mean in this book, it’s possible that the “gold” phase is Ponyboy’s acceptance of himself. Ponyboy loves Johnny. He knows he’s different, and while he doesn’t shout it from the rooftops, he’s happy with it in his own way. He finds other people like him, queer, like Cherry and Johnny.

However, the poem’s whole meaning is that nothing gold can stay. That’s the message we’re left with, even with Johnny’s insistence of “staying gold”. It could honestly be referring to an array of things - perhaps Johnny himself, or life in general (given the amount of death in this book), or youth. Obviously, this whole post is about the queer undertones in the outsiders, so one could argue that it’s about a queer youth experience, especially in the past - finding someone like you, someone you love, but it not lasting forever, and it being especially difficult to find again, given the circumstances.

In the end, Johnny dies, but he leaves Ponyboy with all the things that remind him of him - sunsets, sunrises, Gone with the Wind, stargazing. And ultimately, I think that’s the “gold” that the book is referring to.

[i-did]

Do you have any thoughts on the way “fuck you Nora” impacts things like ships, in particular the recent sentiment that andreil is toxic and other fanon ships are objectively better and healthier that’s in pockets of the fandom. Like I’ve definitely seen it in the Kevin-centric niche the most but even outside of that there’s this belief that things like jerejean and renison would be very soft and healthy when there’s no proof of that. It’s almost like plausible deniability because (1/2)

andreil has canon strengths and flaws that are irrefutable, so when they ship things like Jerejean kevjean that don’t interact they feel a license to make it “better” because they know better than Nora if that makes sense. And Kandrew and kevineil are pitched as being healthier than andreil, among fans who say they wish the kandreil draft was canon where Nora has said multiple times, even when she talks about how fun they were to write that k/a were “obsessive” (2/2)

Yeah I definitely think “fuck you Nora” can play into it, sort of like how for a while most marriage or “I love you” HC posts started or ended with “fuck you Nora”. 

I think andreil are such a unique relationship dynamic of two very “difficult and violent” people ending up together, so I understand why they also get called toxic and flawed a lot. Tbh I can’t really see Andrew or Neil with anyone else, I think they fit together well and what works and is healthy for them just won't work or be healthy for everyone else. 

I also agree in the plausible deniability aspect, sometimes I think these fans take these characters and names and general situations, and make them into OC’s and/or props to fulfill troupes. The nature of fan creation is to play around with canon.

I personally don’t think the average college boy would be emotionally prepared or equipped enough to be a healthy pairing for a recently escaped lifelong human trafficking and cult survivor who just narrowly survived. And I don’t think Kevin who held power over Jean in the nest at number 2 instead of 3 as well as Riko’s partner, would be healthy either. Kevin himself talks about how it was different for him than for Jean, it was worse for Jean since he was a “lower rank.” I think the idea Kevjean is better than Kevin and Thea comes partially from the belief that gay=better in fandom, and the ‘pair the spare’ mentality. 

I also personally think that both Kandrew and Daysten/Kevineil are not good fits either. I’ve talked about it before and explained why I think Kandrew is unhealthy and am not really interested in exploring it, but for Kevineil I personally think they… fight too much I guess. You get in arguments with your friends as well as partners, but the way they affect you and power works can be very different, and the type of arguments are also typically different. I think they're fine as friends, but I think they would need a lot more outside of canon growth and development to be a fit romantically. I don’t care what others want to ship or explore, I just personally don’t see much appeal with either dynamic. 

I think people who say “this would be healthier” are usually imagining their ideas and HC’s and version of the character rather than the canon one, as well as just… their personal idea of what is “healthier” and what a good relationship “looks like”.

Also you briefly mention Renesion as being depicted/perceived as “softer and healthier” too. From what I see of Renesion its very… just kinda there. Usually there isn't a lot of development or they're just sort of in the background of another fic. The Renee and Allison in canon would not pair well together imo either, I also mention this somewhere in an earlier ask as well. I'm all for wlw pairs and ships, and I've read like a decently long Renesion fic my friend @wishbonetea wrote called “The Gracekeepers” where they do actually have chemistry, but are growing differently than they do in canon. In canon Renee is a “bad person trying very hard to be a good person.” she’s anti-negative talk and avoids speaking ill of others or expressing negative or harsh opinions. Allison has recently escaped a stuffy rich people environment where all their words are cloaked and all compliments are backhanded and no one really says what they’re thinking, Allison’s personal growth from this is to let it out and say what she really thinks, who give a fuck if they think she's rude or unladylike, it's her feelings. Also Renee’s past is often just depicted as this cool thing rather than something very truamatizing that she struggles with, makes it hard for her to genuinely connect with others and be her ‘real self’, and Allison's on-again off-again boyfriend just died, and she was there the night it happened. I haven't seen any fics actually explore these topics, just kinda ship them since “pair the spare.” (if any of you know any fics that address this or focus on it lmk)

I'm not going to hold their chemistry to a higher standard than mlm ships tho, I've seen people ship almost all the male characters together in the tags but obviously don’t do as much content for the women, which is a shame because some of the fox ladies have interesting potential chemistry. Dan and Renee have a very interesting dynamic in the EC and Nora herself said if she were to ship the fox ladies it would be Dan with Renee. I personally have high standards for ‘shipping’ I guess, sometimes I vaguely think “oh this could be interesting” but rarely do I actively explore it. I'm a pretty canon focused consumer, I never watched supernatural thinking ‘dustiel’ or even picked up on the queer-baiting until much later. I don't care about shipping the way most fans seem to. I like to imagine Andrew and Neil meeting in their late 60’s or so, or even not meeting the other and being single and having fulfilling lives that way too, which is not a common way to ‘show affection’ to characters. 

I agree with you and think it comes down to plausible deniability and this urge to ‘defy Nora’–be all edgy to an author who stopped listening–as well as pair the spare and fandom culture of shipping at its core. Shipping is seen as a good/better treatment of the characters and “what they deserve” a lot.

[chaoticspacefam]

🖊🖊 for Ni'kasi and an oc of your choice 👀

Thanks for the ask, Pinky! apparently my brain has decided “gush” means “throw lots of random fun facts at everyone” today so here we go! Here’s your favourite tomato gal! :3

-She and Saarai were always twins and I’d always intended for them to be close, and the bare-bones basic premise of how I wanted their relationship to work was “Saarai is the brawn and Kas is the brains”. While this is still true, it did evolve ever so slightly in that Saarai is now also the (more reliable) moral compass. Kas isn’t particularly Dark-sided, but she’s not Light-sided either, she’s inherited a lot more of mom’s “I will do what I have to to get a job done even if that means I have to kill a bitch” attitude XD

-When I first came up with the idea for the twins, Kas’s name was originally going to be “Jen” which is the High Sith word for “hidden, or in shadow” (”Saarai” is the High Sith word for “Truth”, for reference ;) ) ; so their names joined together would have meant “Hidden Truth”. I don’t remember where Ni’kasi came from because it isn’t an “actual” Sith word nor does it have particular meaning (though I might try to make one up, we’ll see :P), but the very first time I went to write down solid bios for them I ended up writing “Ni’kasi” instead of “Jen” for her and it’s stuck ever since then.

-Initially, Kas’s colour pallette was a lot lighter, which you can see in all of her screenshots up till now (cause I forgot to change her when I changed the design earlier this year oops :’D) and also in this art piece I ordered of her last year, here:

(art is by @/cerculor on deviantART)

and the twins were very darn near close to being identical, but I decided that I actually rather liked their dad’s more purple-ish skintone earlier this year and that it was a shame neither of the twins looked a bit more like him, so I changed Kas up a bit and gave her dad’s skintone, jaw spurs and eye colour. She’s got mom’s red-tinted hair and (mostly) mom’s ridge/browstalk structure though :D

-Great with her own kids and direct blood relatives (e.g. nieces, nephews, grandchildren), but kinda iffy with other, random children. She won’t hurt them but she’s very much D’leah’s child in that respect, she’s very “Sith-y”, and liable to be abrasive, unsympathetic and so on. Generally not the sort of presence you’d want around your kids... there will definitely be tears hahahaha

-The scar on her eye was originally going to be caused by D’leah in the same fight that she gets Saarai’s nose, when Ni’kasi got between them to try and break up the scuffle, but I retconned that instead when I re-thought some stuff about that so now she gets it from the Inquisitors after they figure out who killed Ty’s dad and come after them.

-This is also how Kas ends up in the slave pens, after they kill D’leah they throw Ni’kasi into slavery (which is a bit of plot armour/oversight on the Inquisitors part, I admit but shhh XD) and figure y’know “she’s never gonna get out of there again”. A lot can happen, and be forgotten, in 60 odd years tho so eventually they do throw her back into the Academy much to Kas’s surprise.

-She has a lot more scars other than the one on her eye, just that most of them are on her back, or the back of her neck, so you generally can’t see them (I haven’t drawn a scar ref for her yet, it is also on the to-do list lol)

And we random-rolled Aria for this one, so more Tiny Sith nonsense!

(art is by @/ocellifera on deviantART)

-Aria’s hairstyle and general appearance actually came about because it was based on my second-favourite “portrait” choice for the PC in KOTOR II. She wasn’t how I saw my version of the Exile looking, but I really liked the design (including the little blonde fringe streak) so I decided I wanted to do something with it! <3

-We don’t get to see it much because usually when I draw her she’s back with the Sith and fully into the “Dark side” portion of her story and therefore her eyes are amber, but here you go, a nice glimpse of Aria’s natural eye colour! As mentioned on Myla’s ask, she has heterochromia as well, though her grey is “lighter” than Myla’s as she inherited the grey from dad and the brown from mom (yes I know technically it doesn’t work like that but basically I couldn’t decide which one I liked better so instead of agonising over the choice I went “one of each, problem solved” XD)

-Aria was actually the very first SWTOR-era OC I made, very closely followed by her dad, Roan, and then Vano, then her mom when I worked on her backstory, and followed by everyone else haha. I created her for an RP on an RP site that got a couple of posts in and then died/my partner ghosted me for whatever reason (I’ve never found out nor does it matter really), I was disappointed because I really liked Aria and didn’t get to “do much” with her, so I recycled her when another RP popped up, used that to build her backstory and prompt me to start the Subterfugeverse and then threw her into the Zephyrverse AU RP with my buddy k-christine once she got back in touch and we started RPing again :D -Aria gave me the most trouble (other than maybeee Saarai) in terms of finally nailing down what her sexuality was. I had no idea what she’d be at all when I first made her, other than I knew this binch wasn’t straight hahaha. So first, I defaulted her to bi, but then that didn’t seem to fit her much (I didn’t know pansexuality was a thing at the time), then during my self-projection phase I considered leaving her as just a lesbian but she wasn’t happy with that either and eventually I figured out pan is a thing and she started jumping up and down and screaming HELLO YEAH THAT ONE!! at me. The only thing that was for sure obvious to me was that she’s demiromantic, because while she can get around and doesn’t care who with (insert “will fuck anything (humanoid) with a pulse” joke here), the romantic feelings often attached to that for other people take a long time to develop for Aria.

[diegosclownshoes]

it’s the self indulgent longcon commission agent oc who’s the handler’s secret daughter with powers au idea that the writers one-upped when they made lila the handler’s secret daughter who has powers, but make her british. except this one’s five-centric instead lol. this’s a compilation of the initial brainstorming i did over at @paperpocalypse​‘s with more details + more organized (minus the soulmarks aspect, which is explained in this post)

so the agent is one of the 43. the handler’s aware of her powers and orders the hit on her parents when she’s a child. her relationship w the handler is pretty rocky. unlike lila’s upbringing which was much more mother-daughter, the handler was focused on getting the agent to be able to make the maximum use of her powers. speaking of which, her power is the ability to freeze time, but only for as long as she can keep her breath held (held completely, no backup oxygen tank or anything to keep it going for infinity). 

the more people she keeps unfrozen alongside herself, the more energy it takes so she spends a majority of her childhood going through rigorous, borderline abusive training so she’s able to hold her breath for as long as possible and beyond her lung capacity. so it’s hard for her to see the handler as a caring mother figure when this is the same woman who made her hold her breath, put a noseclip on her and then held her head underwater while keeping a timer running. the whiplash from the handler putting her though harsh training and then lovingly holding her after has made the agent wary, and she doesn’t see either the handler or lila as family exactly, but there’s still that unavoidable bond that comes from spending your whole life with someone.

although everyone calls her the agent, she doesn’t work for the commission formerly as in she only goes on the occasional small scale mission and helps out the handler via her abilities. she can go up to 5-6 minutes without too much strain for a job, but the longer ones, around 15-20 minutes or so, require more time to prepare herself physically, the childhood training did help increase the time held, but she needs a couple minutes to breathe as deeply as she can beforehand + she’s a highly trained and highly skilled agent 

now how she fits into the story line considering the ages is a bit tricky bc i don’t see why she’d look younger if she time travels via commission briefcase which means there’s no calculation error that would affect her appearance (even if there were though, writing romance between kids, even if it’s only physically, is a bet iffy so let’s just leave that to the duffer brothers). if she’s actually the age five looks he’d be uncomfortable but if she’s older to match his mental age it wouldn’t work on her end since no matter how old he really is or how he behaves, he still looks like a teenager.

so the idea is when she’s around 18 (in 2007) the handler takes her to 2019 to stop the hargreeves. she first meets five bc the handler has her freeze time when five and luther are making the deal w hazel and cha cha. she’s waiting for the handler to finish up + it was sprung on her so it’s harder to maintain, and her lungs are burning and she feels like she’ll die when five says "just a minute,” and starts moving things around so needless to say, her first impression of him (or, his voice at least since it’s not face-to-face) is not the best.

the handler then sends her to 1960 alone with nothing but a picture of the hargreeves to wait for her mission. by the time s2 plot starts, she’ll be 21 so when later on after five’s aged up his body and the nature of their relationship changes it won’t be that odd. her mission is to protect five while lila handles taking out the other hargreeves. lila contacts her first after five makes it to ‘63, but at elliott’s they act like strangers (which isn’t too difficult considering the 3 years the agent’s spent alone in the 60s before reuniting with lila, who’s now nearly 10 years older than the agent when she can remember training together as teenagers just a few short years prior). 

five wouldn't trust anyone right away (obviously, he straight up tried killing lila) so he doesn’t let the agent out of his sight, which really only makes her mission 10x harder since she can barely get away to meet up  w lila and the handler. however, once she finds out the real motive behind the mission, which is causing the apocalypse, she decides to switch teams. 

revealing her power would be the #1 way to get the hargreeves to trust her, and this happens during the alley meetup. although the results are the same (vanya’s already been taken by the feds by then) and the briefcase is a no go, five notices how painful it is for her (nearly blacking out, muscles contracting, it's NOT a fun time) and how she's willing to go that far to help and forces her to stop for her own good and is like, ok, she wouldn’t go that far and put herself in danger if she’s wasn’t serious about joining us. and here the begrudging allies stage kicks off.  

neither of them feels the most mature for bickering with someone so young compared to themselves (five physically, her mentally), but a majority of their working together ends up being snippy comebacks and scoffing at each other, to the point where they almost end up one-upping each other with how sarcastic they can be. by the end of the season, they’re on good terms and both appreciate each other in both a professional and friendly sense.

post s2 five deals w the sparrow academy and she handles commission business (which is basically just setting up herb’s new office) since she’s joining the hargreeves. five finds a way to age himself up through strategic jumps, so he does them in small increments, just enough until he’s at least 10 years older physically, and then jumps back while keeping himself the same physically.

after this it’s a slow, slow burn. they reunite a couple months afterwards and their dynamic shifts from simply being comfortable fighting and working together before their snarky teasing isn’t so platonic anymore. the agent gets a total kick out of making growth spurt jokes (going “whoa is that a single hair on your chin that i’m seeing??”) but also tries to cover up how awkward she feels abt someone she just saw as a kid a few months ago, and felt only friendship towards now being an adult/older than her and huh, how come their banter’s making her feel kinda fluttery now instead of annoyed, when did that happen? 

and on the other end, five claims he’s not emotionally stunted like his siblings but 40+ years in solitude would make him terrible at realizing what his actual emotions are and he’d write off his own fondness for her as just  finding someone he gets along w who’s not his family. cue hours spent working together while coming to terms with their feelings, complete w obliviously flirting while everyone else pulls out the popcorn. this could go into a canon divergence au where they figure out what to do about the sparrow academy, or depending on s3 and how that goes, a whole separate story line.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #384

“watch your tongue or have it cut from your head”

Do you post to say happy birthday on other people’s walls? Sometimes. Depends on my mood and the person. When was the last time you saw a rainbow? Idr. What’s your favorite television commercial? I don't watch TV enough at all to have one. And who has a favorite commercial, anyway? Do you trip a lot? I don't really trip a lot, but kinda fumble over my footing and stray a bit. I'm horrible at walking straight, and it's gotten worse as my legs have. How old is your television? The one in the living room is god knows how old. My parents were still together when they bought it. When did you last talk on the phone with someone? A couple days ago for my appointment with my psychiatrist. Are you currently sleepy? I'm quite convinced I'm permanently tired. Are you hot or cold natured? I am ALWAYS fucking hot, ugh. Do you take any advanced classes? I took mostly Honors classes in school. Do you have weak upper body strength? My body is just weak as a whole. What is the worst insult someone can call you? Emotionally weak. Are you good at sketching? If we're talking meerkats, haha. They're the only complex thing that I can freehand no problem without needing a reference, honestly. Ever play Angry Birds? Nah. I thought the movie was cute, though. Have you ever been to the zoo before? Yeah. Has anyone ever been weirdly obsessed with you? No. Are you afraid someone might steal your identity someday? It's not something I actively worry about at all. Like, you don't want my identity, I promise. Do you have any talents that come naturally? Growing up, adults always told me I was a "gifted" artist and writer. Also that I seem to have an unnaturally strong connection with animals. I've always been that person where a pet's owner is like "omg ____ never lets people do that" and whatnot. Have you ever had plastic surgery before? I haven't. It's funny though, how opposed to it I used to be... Like goddamn, I was such a fucking stupid and honestly judgmental teenager, regarding many things. I look back on her and cringe. Like damn dude, if you have a safe surgical procedure to help you enjoy the body you're stuck with the rest of your life, you go for it, boo. Are you afraid of airplane rides? Not really. What’s the best Valentine’s Day gift you’ve gotten? There was this one year where Jason had to go to work on Valentine's Day and I was super bummed, yet he still surprised me with a heart-shaped box of chocolates, roses, and a game I really wanted, Heavy Rain. I thought it was the sweetest. What is something you lose often? My phone. ;-; Do you enter a lot of sweepstakes? I don't enter any. Do you consider yourself physically active? *chuckles nervously* Do you have Netflix? Yeah. Favorite salad dressing? That Olive Garden replica you can buy at the store. Do you enjoy dancing? Once upon a time I did. My body could never handle it now. Have you ever considered writing a novel? Many times. Snow or sand? Snow, by twenty thousand miles. It is VERY hard for me to walk through sand, and I also hate hate hate hate HATE the sensation. Do you like sour candy? Heeeeeell yeah man. Have you gotten any injuries lately? If so, what & how? Nothing notable. Are you a clumsy person? Like you would not fucking believe. Last male you talked to in person? I think my primary physician's nurse. Are you thinking about asking anyone out? No. Pink lemonade or regular lemonade? Pink lemonade, for sure. But I love both. Chocolate or strawberry milk? CHOCOLATE. Strawberry milk is disgusting. Have you ever won a contest on the radio?No. Is there a song that reminds you of your best friend? There's quite a few. Has a book ever made you cry? Yes. Do you automatically check your phone when you wake up? Yes, for the time. Do you know anyone who has a pet bunny? Not that I'm aware. What store or website would you most like a gift card for? Rebel's Market. How do you feel about wolves? I adore wolves. Beautiful, majestic creatures with very interesting social dynamics. Name your top 3 favorite musical instruments. Electric guitar, violin, piano. What was the last book(s) you bought at a bookstore? At an actual bookstore, I think it was The Fault In Our Stars, which I never actually read. Do you use Pinterest? Yes. Do you know any sign language? No. Do you have a favorite poem? No. Do you have a dog? No. The one we were pretty much stuck with has a home now. Have you ever read The Little House on the Prairie series? I haven't. Have you ever gone on a service trip to an underprivileged country? No. Have you ever performed in front of more than 100 people? Yes, for dance. When (if ever) was the last time you went to church? Forever ago, I don't even remember the last time. What's a quote you think is really powerful? There's a whole lot. The first one that came to mind was, "An eye for an eye will leave the world blind," which I do believe has great depth in it. Have you ever had to do your laundry at a laundromat? Yes. Are you the oldest person who lives in your household? No. My mom is turning 60 (... I think?) this year. If you have tattoos, how long have you had them? I got my first the day I turned 18. Do you and your dad have similar personalities? We're alike in some ways, imo most notably in that we have NO fucking common sense, embarrassing as that is to admit. We're both kinda slow at understanding things, too. What were the last three things you had to drink? Mountain Lightning, milk, and water. What did your family usually do for Easter when you were a kid? Us three kids all got Easter baskets full of stuff, and we'd go egg-hunting when we were all awake. My little sister Nicole would always wake our parents up in excitement, haha. My parents hid plenty throughout the house, and there was always this one "special" egg that was actually from Mom's childhood and was extremely intricate and beautiful. You basically "won" the hunt if you found it, and it was extremely well-hidden. When you have house guests over, where do they sleep? Historically since living here, my two half-sisters and their spouses (the only people who've stayed over) slept in what is *technically* Mom's room, but for whatever reason this woman still insists on sleeping on the couch in the living room, I guess because she's used to it after all the years she didn't have her own room and bed. Are you emotionally stable? LOLOOLOLOOLLOLOOLOOLOLLOOLOLLLLLLLLLLL Do you still talk to the very first person you had sex with? No. Are you an atheist? No. I don't quite know how to define what I am, but since I believe there's SOME higher power, I don't think it's fitting to call me an atheist. What’s the largest bug you’ve ever found in your house? Hm... I'm unsure. Probably a male mosquito, 'cuz them bitches are big'ins. Would it annoy you if a stranger called you "sweetie?" If it was a man, I'd be creeped out. Are you into fashion design? Not really. What’s the worst thing you’ve gone through in the past year? My leg muscles continuing to degrade, honestly. I have to do something about this shit. How did you get your last bruise? I fell when stepping over the stupid dog gate. Have your parents ever forgotten your birthday? Yikes, no. Would you rather have some bacon or beef jerky? Bacon. Do you like your orange juice with lots or no pulp? NONE. Do you wear skinny jeans? Back when I wore jeans, they were the only kind I wore. What projects are you doing now for school? I'm outta school. What’s the most number of comments you have on a Facebook picture? What is the picture of? I have no idea. Do you like coconut flavored things? No. Have you ever met a famous author before? No. Do you know anybody who has been raped before? No, thank god. I know someone who might've almost been, though. I don't know what the fucking pig was going to do to her if my sister and I weren't there. Have you ever wished for bigger boobs? No. Being overweight, I just want smaller ones now, haha. Have you ever gone a full day without interacting with another person? I've gone many days without it. How many relationships have you been in that lasted less than a year? Four, if you're counting everyone that had the "boyfriend" title. Where were you going the last time you were on a plane? Home from Illinois. Where were you going the last time you were on a train? I've never been on one. Have you ever been significantly more physically fit than you are now? Holy fuck, yes. You would never guess now that I was perfectly healthy in high school especially, yet I still thought I was kinda fat. It hurts so much to look back on. When growing up, did you parents keep the house very tidy? I mean not excessively, but Mom was pretty dedicated to keeping the house in decent condition. With three kids though, of course the house was somewhat messy with toys and all. When you shop at IKEA, do you always stop to eat a snack/meal in the cafeteria? ... There's a fucking cafeteria in a furniture store? o_o I've never been there before. How many watches do you own? None, save for one in my "treasure box" from when I was a kid. I was SO SO SO obsessed with Finding Nemo that I kept my broken one. I did the same with my horribly aged sneakers, like the soles were coming off and Mom finally made me stop wearing them, ha. Are there any ways in which you greatly differ from everyone else in your family? I do fucking nothing and am useless to society. Should teenagers be allowed to have their cell phones with them in class? Yes, because emergencies happen. I personally think it's best to maybe have your cell phone flipped over on the corner of your desk or something and on vibrate, that way the noise isn't too disruptive and the teacher can see you're not just using it for other purposes. Do you have any gay relatives? Yes. Have you ever had to have a pet put down? Sigh, multiple. Have you unfollowed, deleted, or blocked anyone on social media recently? If so, what was the reason? Not recently. How many cups of coffee do you typically drink per day? None. Do you know what your vocal range is? No, but it's not very broad. What’s the biggest financial mistake you’ve ever made? I haven't been in this position before. Have you ever been in a relationship where there was a large difference in maturity levels? No. What’s the longest you’ve ever stayed as a guest at someone’s house? I wanna say over a month while we were technically homeless. How bad was your acne when you were a teenager? Oh dear, it was rough. Like there were people who had it worse than me, but ya girl was lookin preeeetty rough lmao.

[philcoulsonismyhero]

Fic Writer Interview

I got tagged by the excellent @astriiformes Ages ago to do this fic writer interview thing, and I’m finally getting around it! So here goes...

Name:

Mairi (sounds like 'marry'), Kamemor over on AO3 (after a particularly cool Romulan politician in a Star Trek novel, if you were wondering)

Fandoms:

Currently, I'm writing a lot of RWBY fic and that's unlikely to change because I'm deep in Special Interest Hell with no signs of coming up for air. In the past, I've also written a bunch of stuff for Criminal Minds and The Flash/DCTV. I've got a lot of other fandoms, but those are the main ones I've written for.

Two-shot:

Assuming this is asking if I've ever written one, technically no. But I do have a series (Just Hold On, a RWBY fix-it) that currently consists of two fics which could stand alone as they are, although I have plans to continue that one for quite a few more fics if I can find the motivation and time. And I guess I also have a couple of fics that I could have split into two chapters because they switch from one POV to another about halfway through. I like to stick to third person limited POV, and that means I often have section breaks when I want to switch from one character's perspective to another's, and for a two-person scene that usually means two sections. But I like the oneshot structure, and usually I don't feel like what I'm writing is long enough to split into chapters.

Most popular multi-chapter:

I only have one true multi-chapter fic, and it's Moving Forward, a Flash fic based on the idea of Reverse Flash being taken prisoner at the end of s1 rather than being wiped from existence. It's technically still unfinished, but I got a lot of lovely comments on that one a few years back when I was posting it, including a few folks that went through and commented on each chapter and really made my day. Maybe one day I'll actually finish it...

The only other thing I have that’s multi-chapter is a collection of missing scene ficlets, also Flash fic, but that doesn’t really count.

Actual worst part of writing:

My brain tends to be very visual when I'm writing fanfic for a TV show, and few things are as annoying as knowing exactly the facial expression someone is pulling and having No Idea how to describe it in words. Same with tones of voice. Also, I tend to jump straight into writing the bits of scenes that are most interesting to me, and going back and adding in the context that you need to make something actually readable for someone that isn't you can be a bit tiresome.

How you choose your titles:

It depends, tbh. A lot of my older fics are titled with short verb phrases that are pretty straightforward (like 'Moving Forward' or 'Breaking the Cycle'), but recently I've rather enjoyed using song lyrics. Most of my RWBY fics have lyric titles either from songs from the show itself or songs that I've got on my extensive Ironwood character playlist or otherwise just quite like and feel like they fit. I don't tend to find titles all that difficult, and I've got a fair few WIPs that have them already.

Do you outline:

Again, depends on the fic. With longer ones, yes, usually as a list of bullet points describing what happens. But shorter missing scene fics or things that I bashed out in only one or two sessions and only follow a single conversation tend not to be outlined because they just flow as I write them. I've got some more extensive outlines for a few of the fix-it AUs I've been playing with, but even then they're just bullet point lists or mostly held in my own head.

Ideas I probably won't get around to but wouldn't it be nice:

I have. So many. Most of them are RWBY fix-it fic, which is fun to write at the moment of divergence but then A Huge Endeavour to follow any further than that. I’ve planned out a bunch of different shapes for where the three different versions I’ve already written and posted would go, but there’s only one of them that I’m really continuing (aforementioned two fic series). Although I have a dilemma there, because the climax of the story arc that I figured out for that ‘verse would work even better in the other one that focuses more on Penny & Ironwood. But it’s not as simple as just throwing the idea into continuity with that one, because there’s a Major difference between the two in that in one of them, Qrow was the one who got through to Ironwood, and in the other they kinda hate each other over the whole ‘I blame you (and also me but mostly you) for Clover’s death’ thing, so I’d have to plot out a completely different relationship arc there which would have a knock-on impact on how well Ironwood is dealing with everything else. Canon divergence fic! it’s a good time.

I’ve also got So Much other RWBY fic in bits and pieces in various Google docs, it’s ridiculous. (Including a superhero AU that I’m rather fond of conceptually, but don’t really have a solid arc plot for.) A lot of it would be nice to get into a publishable state, but I probably won’t ever be bothered to.

On the not-RWBY front, I've also got a big Criminal Minds/Silent Witness crossover that I've planned out all the beats of, but actually writing it means coming up with the specific details of the murders and the autopsy scenes and a whole lot of technical stuff that I'm not comfortable just winging based on what I've seen on TV. But I also don't like researching real life crime stuff even though I love a good crime drama, so you see my dilemma. I like casefic in theory, but in practice I'm probably not going to write much of it. 

Callouts @ me:

Just because you’re an insomniac who mostly writes fic at night rather than sleeping doesn’t mean that every conversation fic has to happen as a result of one or both characters being unable to sleep, my dude. There are Other circumstances in which people talk to each other.

Best writing traits:

I’m good at character voice, although that’s a pretty standard thing to be good at. I also really like unconventional crossovers, I’ve gotten pretty good at playing around with conversations between characters who never met or aren’t even from the same universe and coming up with a believable dynamic for them. I also like to think that I’m good at getting into the heads of awkward characters and figuring out which bits to poke at in order to get them to do things they didn’t do in canon. (And figuring out how they rationalised the things they did actually do.) That’s a big reason why I liked writing Reverse Flash, the complicated bastard, and it’s why I’m having so much fun with Ironwood now. You’ve really got to work at him to get him to change direction, great big stubborn disaster that he is, and I think I’ve rather gotten the hang of that.

Spicy tangential opinion:

People should write more longfic focused on gen relationships. Some of the most fascinating relationships in stories, at least to me, are the ones between people you’d never expect to be friends, or between adults and the kids they feel responsible for who also feel kinda responsible for them, and that makes for a (imho) much more interesting story than most ships. I Live for a good complicated mentor/mentee relationship, but I hate looking for fic about them because then I have to deal with the fact that a lot of people ship those relationships and it squicks me out. Give me the longfics about types of relationships I actually care about!

(This whole thing is a good 40% of the reason that I’ve ended up get absorbed in planning out a RWBY Vol8 re-write where the parallels and the newly complicated relationship between Ruby and Ironwood is The Main Agenda. (The other 60% of the reason being ‘[x character] deserved better’.) There’s some Really Good Stuff there and I want to play with it in more of a longform situation than my usual oneshots.)

No pressure tagging:

@squireofgeekdom , @catgirlalchemist , and anyone else who wants to give it a go! Feel free to say I tagged you :D

[saturn-j16]

My Thoughts on Miraculous World: New York...

Long time no see everyone! Wow it’s finally here. Fans of miraculous have been waiting for this movie for a while and even more so since the end of season three a while back. To be honest, I didn’t know it was getting released and I only found out because I saw someone post about it on social media. Then I proceeded to freak out thinking I had missed the hype of it by weeks or even months and that everyone would have already moved on. But thankfully I saw it was aired on Sept 25th. So then I sat down to watch it! 

As always it will be split in sections so read what you want :)

--------------------------------------------

Storyline - The storyline was pretty good! While everything was wrapped up in the end, the story and ending did feel a bit rushed but that’s understandable for a TV movie special thats only one hour. Another thing is that the story is a little crowded. What I mean by that is this special introduces a new location, lots of new characters and designs, and still builds on the main cast. The audience has to absorb so much information in 60 minutes and there wasn’t a lot of time to process what happened in the previous scenes. That being said, the good part is that it wasn’t really predicable. I didn’t know what to expect when the movie first started and about a third of the way though I realized it was just like a long version of regular miraculous episode. You know, Mari crushing on Adrien, the villains come, and then everything is back to normal. But there were definitely parts where I didn’t know what would happen and I was eager to find out what happens next. It also got kinda deep as the special gets closer to the final battle but I’ll go more in depth with that further down. 

Ladybug and Chat Noir - I had no problems with how they were presented in the special! I think the conflict was well planned. You can look at the conflict from both ways and understand what LB and CN are feeling and why. Ladybug was worried about leaving Paris in danger and feels somewhat betrayed when she finds out her most trusted ally didn’t stick to his promise. Meanwhile, Chat Noir was struggling with his hero life and personal life which is something we mostly see Mari dealing with. He finally gets to be free for once as Adrien Agreste but also has duties to LB and Paris and hates that he has to leave and let LB down. He feels like he failed as a hero and even renounces his miraculous. It was really interesting! Lastly, for LB and CN we finally get to see more power ups with the Astro powers but we never get a good look of them because they’re barely on screen. I was super excited to see them but hopefully we’ll see it again later up close.

Jess and Aeon - I love these two new characters! We see not one but two new people of color! They also have great personalties that match each other really well. As superheroes they’re pretty cool and they each stand out in their own unique way! The last thing was that I had trouble remembering their names as I don’t remember them properly introducing themselves and they’re were so many new names and faces I just couldn’t remember. They probably did introduce themselves but maybe it wasn’t as noticeable with lots of other things going on. But I love them!

Alya and Nino - Alya and Nino were pretty cute in this movie! I’ve had some problems with Alya’s character in season 3 but she really pulled through in this special when she had her moment with Marinette and was completely honest with her. Also side note, Nino and Adrien’s BFF moment where Nino held Adrien’s face to show him the big city on the bus was so freaking cute!

Adrienette - We get so much Adrienette screen time in this movie! Finally they have some character development in their relationship. What I’m about to say is going to be kind of confusing but hear me out. I feel like Mari and Adrien are on the same level in this movie. Like sure Mari still gets flustered and some of her more “Adrien Fan Girl” traits come out but at least she can talk to him. And with Adrien he’s definitely letting go of his “perfect model” personality a little bit and is being more of a young teen with Mari. Basically they’re just two goofballs for most of the first half of the movie and are finally getting to the same page with each other. So cute!

The second big conflict scene > Adrienette - This is where the special actually got deep. Miraculous is pretty lighthearted for the most part but the Adrienette car scene was just on a whole different level. I actually got really sad when Adrien first renounced his miraculous and then left NYC feeling totally defeated. And then we have Alya’s important scene where she did an amazing job telling Marinette that it’s time to be honest with herself about her feelings for Adrien. And when Mari finally come back to her senses it’s too late. And just the way she desperately tried to chase after that car and not lose another friend just hit different.

The Diversity - Up until now, Miraculous has been decent with including not just racial diversity but also LGBTQ+ diversity... *cough* still waiting for Julerose to be confirmed canon even though they practically are at this point *cough*. However, that complete changed in this movie with the superhero mom couple with two racially diverse daughters one even being an android which is awesome! And even more so with the new Eagle Miraculous being tied with Native American Culture!

Final Thoughts - I thought this was a really good movie and I definitely loved watching it! We got new characters, character development for our main heroes, diversity, and a whole new location. It had lots of twists and turns and kept me wanting to find out what happens. I wish it was a little longer so we could fit in some smaller things like the new power up suits and more interaction with friends but it flowed nicely for the most part. I will definitely be watching again!

---------------------------------------------

Thanks for reading! Whether it was only a few sections or the whole thing! I really did like this movie! I haven’t really been active in this fandom or been on tumblr recently as I decided I wanted to watch more animes that have been sitting on my to-watch list for ages now. Hopefully now that this movie is out I’ll be more active again. And I’ll definitely be back for season 4. See you soon! :)

[goodbysunball]

Ten weeks away, six beats off

Been a whirlwind year so far but I'm back in the saddle. I'm busting at the seams with drivel on records and the best way to unleash it is in these grouped posts. Small plates, quick bites - bon apétit.

Bobby Would, World Wide World (Low Company)

Can Low Company just come back as a label and a record store already? These releases trickling out after its demise are cruel reminders of how essential those self-effacing tastemakers were. The Anti-Clock LP is a doozy, and this second Bobby Would record sounds like a classic right off the bat. Mr. Would sticks to the same stuff that made Baby so damn good: dusty loops, barely discernible vocals with a catchy melody, bright spindly guitar lines for days. Songs like "Natural Killer" and "Walk Away" are the immediate favorites, upbeat on the exterior but bleary-eyed upon close inspection. Repeated listens have revealed that the hungover haze of "Maybe You Should" and the last call sway of "Raft," which might be my favorite, are where he really shines, tempos slowed to a crawl to make room for the rich warmth of his reverb'd mumble and his sparkling guitar. Yeah, I'm crushin' on Bobby Would, but so's everyone I've forced this record upon. Sharp but unassuming, and endlessly listenable, World Wide World is the balm until better days arrive. Top notch, highest recommendation, all the fixin's.

The Begotten, Temidden Laaghangende Wolken (Aguirre)

I'm a new dad and that means I'm searching for music that I can listen to with my daughter without disturbing her, and music that isn't Raffi. Typically that means a lot of drone, and a lot more quiet, introspective music, like the reissue of Lol Coxhill & Morgan Fisher's Slow Music that Aguirre did. Because the reissue job on that record is so good, I decided to roll the dice on a contemporary offering from Aguirre that also sounded like it fit my needs. My initial reaction to hearing the Begotten's music online was that this trio was approaching zones tread upon by Fabulous Diamonds circa Commercial Music, but subsequent listens have decidedly not taken me that far out. While it's clear the band is made up of exceptionally talented musicians, the music tends to be pretty safe and stays close to the shore. The B-side's a bit better: "Eiland Zonder Oceaan" and "60 Manen" are as close as this record gets to the "dub with tears" descriptor from the label, and the gossamer drone of closer "Klauwzeer" is cool, but nothing really sticks once it's over. Seems like these guys could probably freak out the crowd at a traditional jazz club, but Temidden Laaghangende Wolken keeps the listener at arms' length, simmering but ultimately tepid once you're beneath the surface.

Cube, Drug of Choice (Alter)

Fave record of the year so far! I caught Cube (aka Adam Keith) burning down the Pilot Light what seems like an eternity ago, touring on his last LP, Decoy Street. Nothing on that LP approached the fiery performance I saw, but he's definitely harnessed that energy on Drug of Choice. The record flows seamlessly, corroded breakcore flooding into all corners, causing machines to gasp and whirr and burst, and Keith's intermittent vocalizations are as sinister and biting as they are introspective and philosophical. "Natural Selector" has all of the above, but for my money it's the closing duo - the frenzy of "Moderator" and the terrifying strobelight beatdown of "Cusp" - that really show the piledriving exterior/groaning interior dichotomy that makes the record so magnetic. The label said it best: Drug of Choice "deliver[s] something that feels as much focused on artful constructions of private experiences as it does the cathartic qualities of noise." Alter's quietly releasing some of the best contemporary records, but Cube's Drug of Choice has all the right stuff to justifiably blow up their profile. Wildly intense and devious record; grip a copy and lose your mind with me. While you're at it, check out Adam Keith's amazing Baited Area zine - some of the most engaging arts 'n culture writing/interviews this side of Demystification.

The Gagmen, s/t (iDEAL)

Aaron Dilloway, Nate Young, Joachim Nordwall and apparently Andrew W.K. teamed up as the Gagmen for a performance a few years ago, captured here and put to wax by Nordwall himself for his iDEAL label. I was expecting a pretty blistering assault given the clientele, but what you get is the opposite: slow loops, spare instrumentation, Young's sleepy vocals, all stark and creepy and forcing you to lean into it. The end of the second track gets a little intense, with some wailing loop and white noise combining to tickle your ear hairs, but aside from those couple of minutes, the bulk of The Gagmen is like a black breezy night forcing things to move that usually don't. Puts a knot in your stomach, it does. Hey, it's not for everyone, but if you loved the Komare LP from last year like me, you're gonna find a lot to enjoy here.

Monokultur, Ormens Väg (ever/never)

Glad to see Monokultur continuing their relationship with ever/never, not least of all because those overseas shipping costs hurt. Ormens Väg is the Swedish duo's second LP, and right from the jump they're seemingly headed in a more accessible pop direction. It's a good look for them: opener "Decennium" features big warm keyboards and probably the most exposed vocals from the band yet, kinda coming across like the Knife covering Berlin. It's followed by my favorite track, "För sent," which has a bass line that melts and soothes your ears, topped by JJ Ulius' forlorn (I'm assuming) spoke-sung vocals. The band nods at an earlier incantation of themselves on the buzzed descent of "Kanske blir det sämre", but for the most part the rest of Ormens Väg continues in this gorgeous, warm and spare mode. Take the beautiful instrumental "Vårdagjämning," which almost sounds like it was lifted from the xx's cutting floor until the tape loops emerge like swirling smoke to cloud the proceedings. By the track's end the band somehow ends up on Robert Turman's turf but everything feels cohesive, all of it delicately presented. Shit, even the snippet of "Silent Night" emerging at the end of the title track doesn't take the record off course. Pretty much perfect little record, and yet another early favorite from this year.

Nina Harker, s/t (Animal Biscuit/La République des Granges/Le Syndicat des Scorpions)

This record came out in the middle of 2020, but I missed it then and it's a current obsession now. Shoutout to @dustedandsocial, Yellow Green Red, Fuckin' Record Reviews and everyone else who pointed me in its direction, late as I may be. I don't have a whole lot of info on Nina Harker but it appears that it's the work of one Valentin Noiret, some mad multilingual genius working between the lines connecting Dome, La Grande Triple Alliance and Enhet För Fri Musik. "L'affreuse" is pretty illustrative of how Nina Harker condenses genres into bite-size packets: the woozy, seasick synth topped by Xasthur-like vocals, which are then joined by what sounds like despairing Japanese, the shuffling song slowly building up to this terribly simple guitar part that just levels you when it hits. Not everything is so busy: "Müssen Wir Noch Aufblühen⁇" is a fantastic slice of minimal synth, and the two late night strummers "το κορίτσι γαβγίζει" and "Muto" are disarming in their stripped-down simplicity. The hum that overwhelms "Muto" razes the field to make way for the robotic waltz and maniacal ravings on "Du Schaffst es Nicht," one of many catchy, totally bizarre moments on the record. Nina Harker is riddled with anxiety, moving from frenzied to haunting without batting an eye, but it's also an absolutely singular approach to the dread and restlessness lurking in the corners. Perhaps more prescient than they would've guessed when they made this record. Stunning, hits the spot every time, track down a copy posthaste.

[thoughtsarestupid]

From the sidelines; asexual daddy’s dating advice (part 2; electric boogaloo)

(yes, part 2. Told you that you couldn’t stop me from making this a series)

(Pt. 1 https://thoughtsarestupid.tumblr.com/post/653149068430835712/from-the-sidelines-asexual-daddys-dating-advice )

On this episode; HEELS. WHAT. (And other clothes)

Heels are, as we all know, a type of shoe. One that involves learning how to walk in a completely different way and, as my sister tells me, feels like you just repeatedly attempt to not break your ankles every time you take a step. And although it may seem like a good idea to wear them for some kind of… classiness, or sexiness, or allure or however you call it, it’s really not.

You see, if you’re comfortable on heels, you’re fine. Wear them all you like. But if you’re like most heel-wearing women and would rather attempt to fit sneakers into your handbag (OH ILL GET TO THAT LATER FASHION INDUSTRY) than to walk on heels even a second more than necessary; hear me out.

What if you just… don’t?

You see, if you’re looking for a serious relationship, and not a quick fuck, you’re not trying to give someone a false image (or at least I hope you’re not. Might have to dedicate an episode to that.) but an actual idea of who you are. And wearing heels? That’s not who you are. I suggest comfortable, clean shoes. Because you don’t want to come off as raggedy, but you don’t want to be nervous. And comfortable shoes are perfect for making you feel less tense, which in turn will make the vibes less tense and the one on the other side of the date less tense. A win-win.

NEXT UP; TIES.

Yes men, were talking about those. Colors, bow or neck, slim or thick, pattern or one color. Lots of choices and, if you’re wearing a tux or three-piece to your date, one of the few ways you can change it up. Now, I don’t advise you to wear such a business outfit to a date if you fancy yourself a mate, but let’s get into it anyways;

The main thing you should be considering is the color. You see, an entire branch of psychology has theorized and proven how colors associate in your brain, which is where this chart comes in;

Basically, you want to choose your tie color after what you want to represent. Look into it a bit, find what you think is best and wear that.

Also, I am begging you.

DONT WEAR A COLORED BOW TIE.

The only color a bow tie should have is black, and that’s final. Otherwise you will look like a clown. Wear a necktie, single Windsor knot. If you’re going for the vibes I think you’re going for, that’s your best bet.

THIRDLY; POCKETS.

There’s this joke that women fit a hundred million things into their bags, and that’s kinda right. While on the other hand, men fit a hundred million things into their pockets. You see; the fashion industry really, really likes to sell women more shit. So they withhold them pockets. So they can sell them bags. Seems a bit rude to me but I’m not here to give you a lecture on economy, but on the dating scene.

Anyways, to put it simply; take only the bare necessities. If you’re intending to pay; a wallet. Always bring your ID. Phone, on silent or preferably off. If you want it, perfume. I’ve learned that it smells a little different when applied just before you meet up and that does wonders sometimes. First impressions and all. Maybe a beauty product you can apply in under 60 seconds, but try to make sure your pockets and or bag don’t or doesn’t seem full. If you take a lot of things you seem overprepared, or the other feels underprepared, and that creates stress. And that is both bad.

Finally; clothing choice.

Coco Chanel get off the F*CKING STAGE WE DONT NEED YOU.

Little black dress? Cool. Tuxedo? Nice.

But you’re overdoing it. If you’re looking for a connection, a spark? I recommend you don’t spend more than 30 minutes picking an outfit. Preferably, put on two timers. One for 25 minutes and one for 30. If you’re done before the 25 minute mark, you’re underthinking it. After the 30 mark; you’re overthinking it.

And no, I don’t know your wardrobe. But guess what? I do know your thought process. It doesn’t have to be half an hour. But setting a specific time border to when you need to make the decision means your brain can find some amount of solidity in your stress. Sometimes the first outfit you chose was right. Sometimes you actually need the hour you spend on choosing. But again; you need to be calm. Stress is fine, but stress means you’re going to act differently while your main goal on a date is to determine if the person opposite of you is a good match. And if you’re stressed, your brain goes funky and decides much less rationally.

So calm down and find something you’re comfortable in without looking underdressed. I don’t know what’s in your wardrobe, but you’re not in a job interview with Steve Jobs. Just remember you’re also not partying with the boys/girls. Find a balance. Just don’t stress. People don’t primarily judge on fashion choice anyways, unless you’re dating an Instagram model who only cares about clothes in which case

Then; to counter some arguments again;

Yes, of course there are people that are only dating to get a quick shag. One night stands are popular, and so is dating for sex. If you want that, you dress for that. I suggest something slutty and revealing so your intentions are clear.

Yes there is such a thing as slutty clothes for men.

Indeed, it is true that wearing too informal clothes is a dealbreaker for some. That’s why I don’t recommend you choose ONLY on comfortable levels. Don’t show up in PJs. You have to find a balance that makes you comfortable and let’s the other know you’re serious.

Just because I’m asexual doesn’t mean I don’t understand the dating market. Trust me, people are underthinking or overthinking their clothes.

25-30 minutes is indeed a randomly chosen window of time, but it’s only an advice. 15-20 minutes might work just as well, or 45-50. But that’s personal preference, and I don’t advice you to go past 60 minutes. It’s about having a handle for your mind to hold on to, not about a very specific rule.

And remember; this is all coming from someone who has never dated anyone and is not interested in dating anyone. I’m literally saying this as advice from the sideline, like a soccer dad trying to advice you all how to play the game because what you’re doing is stupid.

Sincerely,

A.

[vanityloves]

anyways im gonna listen to/read the fuckin...rise of the ogre shit bc ive been putting it off 🪓🥴 im gonna put stuff under the cut bc im gonna be TALKING n dont wanna make a new post everytime

piss

ok he performed for 2 pounds 50. which is basically $3 today i- well it was absolutely a power play on his father behalf that also had the promise of money so.

also lol he said Rejection fueled my ambitions which, yknow,, i already knew but it still hurts and i will continue to talk ab it xoxo

AH HELP. "...if ebay had been invented at the time he would've sold me online there and then,"

"man hands on misery to man, yknow"

THEN PROCEEDS TO CONNECT IT TO MUSIC/HIS CAREER. this man said :) the one thing i truly have a passion for. the one thing i fucking like.

oh yeah. bullied by students AND teachers.

oh god hes 42ish during this interview? ok.

the fuckin school bully saying he wouldve acted differently if he knew what hed become

getting called "faceache", then proceeds to call 2d that. jfc he really does just repeat what everyone says. really "treating others how i was treated/how they treat me"

maybe thats why? hes kinder to fans? bc :] you support me and like me so, ok ill return that energy

MURDOC GETTING HIS ASS BEAT N PARADING HOME LIKE WELL I WON BC 'I PISSED YOU OFF' SJDJD

a real rowdy boy. absolute nasty boy. fraud and arson... shooting ppls windows with his air pistols

black sabbath being a huge inspiration? fucking absolutely.

became a satanist n shit at age 16? "it fitted me like a glove" "heavy metal and devil worshipping became my favorite past times" ajsj funny that ppl in trying times often seek religion or following of some sort

heavy metal being his favorite, n loving the clash, while hannibals was more punk based

hannibal breaking murdocs nose for the 2nd and 3rd time for playing his music on hannibals turntable

he doesnt sound that bitter? ab hannibal? he doesnt sound incredibly fond but he talks ab how he got him into a lot of music. so, i imagine they we're a bit closer than i thought?

international baccalaureate in antisocial? anthropology?

MURDOC IS ACTUALLY SMART HE WAS JUST. NOT INTERESTED IN THE SUBJECTS? I GUESS? (also,,, he literally Built cyborg noodle and i think he had a PhD too lol. but its always nice to hear hes actually...yknow, interested or good at other things)

alright but murdoc having a fascination w/ other cultures - or at least some interests, that lead him to actually study the damn subject and "pass with flying colors"

'fuck college though. im gonna be a rockstar'

he sold his soul at 18ish? whenever the fuck he got kicked out but college was mentioned so my brain goes to 18ish idk

he lived with his father still and paid rent via low paying jobs one including 'part time dressing as santa'

help he was ab to take a Personal Job for quick cash and uhh well, "still made me call him sir though" he really said 20 dollars is 20 dollars, huh "that story was totally true"

alright, 1997,,,

2d stuff

loves zombie stuff? thats really cute, and is freaked out by the way they move. god he rambles

both he and murdoc are horses in the chinese zodiac

[[jfc ok if the official shit compares them a lot i understand why ppl ship them but Dont. its a narrative foil and that doesnt always mean Romance jfc.]]

SUMTHINK.

truly... a lil stinker. super cute bouncing baby and a "bit thick" which is stull so endearing to me. hes just a happy man!

excitable 10 year old and would dance around his room

jfc the fact he has normal/caring parents. i kinda forget how opposite hes supposed to be from murdoc but i think thats another thing jsjsysg (murdoc said why isnt my tragic story making me famous why does he get to be the Star. no wonder he acts like a loon)

i still dont get how gettin bonked by a tree branch made him go bald and also turn his hair blue

big tiddy nurse mommy,,,

went to the same school as The Cure and got decent grades despite hittin the noggin quite hard. WANTED TO BE A STORM CHASER... OMG??

oh thats really cute, hed bond with his dad by building keyboards toegther 🥺💕

messed around with paints and graffiti? artistic king

MURDOC AGAIN: QHDJ 'VILLANOUS' GANG HELP

oh yeah d day...new instruments, new band, new singer - and 'had to be the best or no dice' and absolutely CONFIDENT that his songs were bangers ajsjd

but on that same note, had absolute faith (or desperate) in 2d which i love

ransacked the fucking music shop jdjdj and 2d said he was Just Standing There behind the counter the whole shift hdhdh

"thats when your eye came out, yeah" "yeah!-" HELP WHY DOES HE SOUND SO HAPPY AB IT ?? yes he said ut hurt but he sounds...ok

jfc murdoc ragdolling this poor mf around. dunking him and slapping him around. actually? so incredibly terrible and abusive and i hate him for that 🔫 im sorry 2d stans. we dont condone that behavior here ong.

how and why the FUCK did 2d's parents allow that fucker near their child after that i??? help. wtf. his moms a nurse why didnt she just have murdoc sit in plain view of other people. god damn.

2d flying out the window n hitting the curb "whoops"

"just two black holes...[ah] it looked great...a blue hair, blacked eyed GOD- the girls would go wild-" "pretty boy looks" ???? HELP. HE DOESNT GO LIGHT ON THE COMPLIMENTS, HUH

RUSS TIME

oh yeah, he straight up kiddnapped this man help. idk how he managed that, russ is a Big Man??

AND MURDOCS MUSIC WAS SO FUCKING SEXY GOOD that russel said hm alright ill stay, :] out ifbhis owm free will im screaming.

"oh this is one of them febreeze commercials" "uh . yeah sure. *murdoc turning on his Sick Tunes*" but that either means? it was just his guitar playing the convinced russ? unless he and 2d recorded sumn?

"2d was the looks, murdoc the brains, then russel truly was the heart"

'while 2d and murdoc liked music, this man was a MUSICIAN' god fucking bless this book holy shit ny man russ getting some respect. he said back hurts from carrying this band.

murdoc basically heard this guy had big trauma that gave him So Many Skills n said "thats what i want" ok idk thats actually really? inch rest ting to me. seems that murdocs fine handing out compliments but i guess that where his charisma really helps out yeah?

"he was going to be in my band whether he liked it or not" ...murdoc-

HELP. 2D IS LIKE BRO GO ON IM LISTENING 🥺 despite hearing the story 50-60 times and murdoc said fuck off you lil shit.

ok irrelevant but i love his voice! its super comforting n nice to listen to 🥺

HELP MURDOCS SO BITTER. "NOTHING THAT HAPPENS TO US IS NORMAL" WELL YEAH. THIS IS TRAUMA CENTRAL.

idk how/why he sucked up all his friends souls though ... how are they all possessing the same person. they said "its my turn on The Russ"

DELL IS HIS ACTUAL, LITERAL SOULMATE...KING...😭

went to a private school,,, and was already possessed? and the thing where he gets bigger and smaller is a reoccurring thing?

was in a coma for 4 years?

hiphop machine...time and history...the ultimate set i guess.

his knowledge was infinite and hes a "Renaissance man" hes so fucking smart our king. jack of all trades but a master of drums. he said i know im good and what of it

PAULA.

HELP. HE RMBRS THE STALL: CUBICAL NUMBER 3 🥴 IF I DO RECALL 🤤

yes russel our king. fuck up his nose 5 more times. probably stunted his growth too. he shrunk after russ gave him a wallop im sure

why dies paula sound like tracer overwatch

also only dated 2d for 2 months before joining the band?

HELP SHE REALLY WAS THE FIRST MURDOC FUCKER: "but when i saw murdoc with his thick greasy hair, green teeth and yellow skin i thought 'oh this is the ine for me!'" "OH HES SUCH A DANDY-" HELP ME IM HQJDHD

sick in the head...like i want to hurt people help girl. shes fucking Crazy. but she rly said damn i didnt hear back from him again 😭 and my purse is gone JSHHD

MURDOC: SHE WAS DEPRESSINGLY UGLY *still fucked her*

NOODLE TIME

"small japanese person!"

2d: we werent gorillaz until noodle arrived!

im dying the reason he chose gorillaz. 'swinging through the jungle baring my ass'

noodle really said "im just happy to be here" and she balanced everyone out 😭 "she gave off pure love and the fact that she could laugh at murdoc REALLY helped too" RUSS... IS BABY

JFC MURDOCS SO FUCKING CONFIDENT IN THIS BAND IM LIVING FOR THAT. HE SAID YOU WANT US SO BAD IT MAKES YOU LOOK STUPID. THE CHARISMA

2d rambling ab some girl he met and "ssSs" "whats the s stand for hawhaw" "i dont know!".

THE RECORD LABEL GUY.

one song is all it took i ❤ good for them

just murdoc talking ab the party that they threw for thier deal and saying "you dont know how much of a dick i felt like [when carrying one of those huge checks]" like oh thats whatll make you a dick? alright.

A FOOD FIGHT THAT WENT SO HARD THAT IT KNOCKED 2DS TONSILS OUT? WHAT THE FUCK

ahshdj damon and murdoc not getting along bc of Rival Band One Uppery + damon calling murdocs cuban heels crap since ge wore steel ones with gold spurs.

MURDOC FEELIN EMBARRASSED BC HES 'QUITE PROUD OF HIS SHOES'

but the band and damon getting over music and their ambitions and became a "paternal figure"

HELP MURDOC SAID AWIOGA @ RACHEL WHICH MADE HER THROW HER DRINK IN HIS FACE AND SPLIT FROM 2D. kinda sad actually, she said i still like 2d but murdoc kinda ruined it by trying to get it in with me, it put a strain in our relationship :/ oh god murdocs That Dude

nov 31 1998: started recording :]

40 tracks that got cut down to 15 holy shit

KONG STUDIOS 🤲

hooking up cameras in every room ejdjsu

webby artist of the year in 2006? holy shit

noodle learning ab kong studios omfg

JFC. YES I KNEW KONG WAS BUILT ON/IN A CEMETERY BUT I DIDNT KNOW PPL FOR THE FUCKING PLAGUE WHERE THROWN THERE HDJD

built in 1739?

the ghost of the first owners ghost still roams around in the kitchen in the early hours and moans 'aaa glass of water'

theres some rotting bullshit near the studios and in the summer its fucking TERRIBLE

the former owners were a biker gang, and they all died in a fire

murdoc said this place has bad vibes. i want it.

grim weather

the building feels impossible to escape from huHgg