#which is why they're a little janky

[coconi]

A little something I've been working on

(EDIT: the complete version is available here 💗)

[redflagshipwriter]

Hot Ghouls in Your Area 8

Chapter 8

Masterpost

“You're just now going to campus?” Jazz said. Danny scowled ahead at the sidewalk. Her tone wasn't judgmental so much as mildly surprised. He still hated it. “That's a lot later than usual. Is everything alright?” Danny hunched his shoulders up and consciously reminded himself not to get defensive. He wasn't slacking. He'd gotten home after his class and slept 13 hours. He still felt wiped out.

“Ghost stuff,” he said cryptically. “Ruined my night.” He dodged someone on the sidewalk without thinking about it, used to the crowds by now.

Jazz inhaled sharply into his ear. “They're supposed to leave you alone to focus on your education,” she hissed. “Just so you know, I do have the venomous Fenton electric creep stick-”

“Yeah, I know,” Danny cut her off. She was probably holding it up right now, thumb on the trigger. He couldn't fight off the rueful smile. She had his back, didn't she? Always did. With that in mind… “I think I need help,” he admitted. Oof. Felt bad. Not as bad as failing his classes, though, which was the danger if he got pulled too deep into more Ghost bull honkey.

“Of course!” Jazz enthused. He stepped off the curb and then quick-stepped backwards to avoid getting hit by some asshole running the red light. Danny lifted up his free hand to flip them off as he hung on his heels on the edge of the pavement drop. He dropped lightly back onto the balls of his feet and jogged across the street.

Jazz was still talking, voice clear over the morning meld of honking and running engines. “How about you come over to my place after your classes tonight? My roommate is out for a conference.”

“You just don't want to come to Crime Alley,” Danny accused her. “Even for me, your beloved baby brother.” He dodged a car that was parked on the cross walk and made an ugly face at the driver. “Despite your professed love for crime, when it counts, it's all talk.”

“I don't love crime,” Jazz reiterated with her inhuman patience. She didn't take the bait of his deliberate mischaracterization of her career plans. “But I am exquisitely stabbable." Her tone went lofty with the brag. "So yes, I avoid Crime Alley.”

Danny blew an unimpressed raspberry to show what he thought of that.

He hadn't met anyone in Gotham yet who he thought would really throw Jazz for a loop. She was a 6ft 2 judo black belt, and she was liminally spooky as fuck. “No one would stab you,” he said, making it sound like an insult. His janky ass was more likely to get held up. "But fine, I'll haul my poor broken corpse all the way over there to do you a favor-”

“So I can do you a favor,” Jazz corrected wryly.

“My poor broken corpse,” Danny cut back in, because that was a really relevant factor to him. He put the back of his hand to his forehead and swooned a little. He felt like he'd been in a tumble dryer. Missing a full night of sleep was an insufferable insult to his desperate shoe-string construction of a healthy routine.

“I would so get robbed if I came there,” Jazz argued. “Maybe even kidnapped.” He could all but hear her flip her hair.

He snorted but let her keep her delicate feminine delusions about not being one of the scariest motherfuckers in the crime capital of the country. He wasn't actually worried about her interning at Arkham Asylum. Maybe he'd freaked out a little when she'd moved here, but that wasn't why he was here. No matter what anyone said.

“There's no immediate danger, right?” Jazz checked. “No reason I need to be concerned today?”

“Nah,” Danny reassured her, as the campus came into sight. He had about an hour before class to spend in the lab before his lecture. “It's not that kind of problem.” He felt his face arranged itself into a wry smile. “You might like this one.”

“Oh?” Jazz asked, intrigued. “Do tell.”

“Only after I've sworn you to perfect silence,” Danny shot back instantly. “I mean it, for real, you can't tell a soul living or dead or nonliving or-”

“I think I get it,” she cut him off. Jazz huffed. “As if I can't keep a secret. You think I can't keep secrets? I know the most incredible things that you could never dream up.”

“...Big if true,” Danny snarked, pretending that he wasn't extremely interested.

“You never knew what happened to the Robinsons,” Jazz said airily. “And you never will.”

“...that doesn't bother me at all,” Danny lied. He stopped walking.

“Ahuh,” Jazz said knowingly. “Hey, remember the neon cheese incident?”

Danny gritted his teeth. “Can't say I do,” he said. It was bullshit, and even he knew it wasn't convincing Jazz. He was dying to know the truth. It had been the talk of the town for weeks and was still occasionally featured on unsolved mystery podcasts. He'd gone far enough to ask the Dairy King, but even the dead wouldn't speak on it.

“Have a good day of classes, little brother,” Jazz said sweetly. She ended the call.

He rubbed at his temples. Ancients, she gave him a headache. She was fantastic. She was killing him and absolutely ruining his unlife. He couldn't even beg her for answers about the neon cheese, because if he managed to badger it out of her, it would prove she could be manipulated into telling secrets. That would be a loss anyway. It was more likely that either she didn't know anything or that she knew and her lips would stay sealed: Danny didn't have any to waste his breath.

He did a few calming rounds of breathing, now that he was thinking about it, and then went on with his day a bit invigorated by the familial aggravation.

Danny felt a little better about focusing on class now that he knew he could count on Jazz in his corner. She was the smartest person he knew. She could probably get him divorced by the end of the day. Hell, she probably already had a contingency plan for getting him a divorce. She was so ready for him to have a relationship so that he would have relationship problems to ask her about.

When he finished up on campus, Danny cut across town to pick up takeout food as an offering. He presented it to Jazz as soon as she opened the door, head bowed and food theatrically high.

“Oh, come in,” Jazz said, exasperated. She grabbed him by the back of his collar and bodily pulled him inside. “My neighbors are going to think I'm so weird, Danny!”

“My liege,” he intoned seriously. “I come bearing- ow! Stop hitting my- hey, my face!” Danny wrestled away from the horrible pinching grip his terrible sister had on his cheeks, scowling. “That hurt,” he complained. “Have you ever thought that you're getting caught up in the cycle of violence?”

“I don't lose sleep over it.” Jazz lowered herself delicately onto one of the weird puffs she had instead of chairs and made grabby hands at the takeout. “What did you get me?”

“Coal,” Danny snarked. But he handed over the bag without a fight and plopped himself onto the closest poof thing. He fully laid out and let his head flop past the edge to hang upside down.

“Inversion therapy, so chic,” Jazz said absently.

He considered flipping her off, but his balance was really off in this position and it would be hard to defend himself if she lunged at him. Hell, if she picked up his legs he'd probably tip over onto the floor. Danny dug his heels into the side of the poof in defensive preparation. He kept her in his peripheral vision.

“Oh, Malaysian,” Jazz enthused. “I wanted to have this!” She sounded a little too surprised.

He shot her a thumbs up. Two days ago, she'd sent him a screenshot of a text landing from someone else that had shown most of her screen was the active map app she was using to get to an appointment. The Malaysian restaurant had the star mark that she put on the places that she wanted to try.

He'd gambled that she hadn't gone yet because she hadn't had a late night at work. Jazz only got takeout with company or if she got home too late to cook.

“Cool,” Danny said, because he didn't want his rotten sister to think he cared about her interests. “It was on the way and it smelled good.”

Jazz hummed and put the food on the side table. “So I see.” She folded her fingers in front of her face and peered at him over the steeple. “What happened? What ghost do I need to soup with a fragrant combination of turmeric and saffron?”

“Please don't waste that, ghosts taste fine on their own,” Danny said.

Jazz grimaced. “Ew, Danny,” she enunciated carefully. She paused. “Ew.”

He shrugged and accidentally slipped a little closer to the floor. “Just saying. But actually, no one dead was involved, unless we count-”

“We don't count,” Jazz cut him off, serenely unbothered by his attempts to score empathy points off his death. She was a cold customer.

“Boo,” Danny said, because he knew his brand and respected ghost tradition. “Anyway, Jeremy Waters. Remember -”

“How could I forget,” Jazz muttered. She put her hands on her face.

“Hey,” Danny said, offended that Jeremy got that reaction and he got a big fat impassive nothing no matter how annoying he was.

“What’s Jeremy done?” Jazz sounded exhausted by the concept.

“Well… He uh.” Danny stared at the ceiling. He couldn't look at her directly. “Well. You know how he wants the good favor of the god of the underworld?”

“Yup.” Jazz hit the ‘p’ sound hard.

“He uh, hit the idea that uh. Maybe a Persephone of sorts was just the thing to suck up.”

He heard fabric rustle as Jazz sat up. “He did?”

Wow, she had one of the most fascinating ceilings in the world. Danny stared intently up at a splotch that looked vaguely malign. She ought to get that checked out by an expert before it possessed somebody. “Yeah, so he's been trying to vault people into the Ghost Zone as bridal sacrifices.”

“Ahuh.” Jazz sounded a little bit choked up. She wasn't laughing, so he couldn't complain.

“I had Dani get Vlad look into it-” because Dad or Mom would have been mortifying- “and apparently, he told her the odds of some hack wizard managing to send a living human to the ghost zone was laughable.”

He paused. He couldn't go on.

“And Vlad would know,” Jazz said leadingly.

Danny put a hand over his face. “Yeah, see, the thing is that I'm now very concerned that Vlad might not know.” His words came out muffled.

Jazz was so intent on him. He pretended even harder not to know she was leaning in towards him. “Does- does the ghost king have a bride, Danny?” She somehow managed in a professional tone.

He nodded miserably.

She promptly lost her shit laughing at his misfortune.

[evilminji]

Okay, you know how City Spirits are a thing?

And Superheros both Die, Un-Die, Re-Die, Dimensionally Sorta Maybe Die But Then Don't, and also never Died in the first place? And probably do at least a portion of that in Medical? While ALSO hanging out, quantumly maybe Dead, maybe alive, in their Super Cool Clubhouse?

Which is ALSO exposed to space rays, the entirety of The Magic Club, weird alien Technology, aaaaand whatever they decide to store on it??

:T

I'm just SAYING...

For as long as dwellings Of Significance have existed, there have been house spirits. They are the IDEA of the house. The SIGNIFICANCE of it. What makes it HOME. The weight of the halls that turn into Halls. And The Watchtower? Is KNOWN to enough people, to have SIGNIFICANCE.

It's a HALL where Heros Live. A Place Of Safety. It GAURDS.

It is also inanimate. Steeped heavily in every sort of energy, be it magic or science, and multidimensional fuckery imaginable. But? Not SENTIENT. Yet.

Until of course... this new fangled Anti-Ghost Shield comes out. By the new and recently no-longer on the run (from the Goverment they're at war with) Dr.'s Fenton! Why were they are war? Don't worry about it!

They Won.

:)

Unrelated! Never threaten their kids. They WILL find you. Not a threat, just informing!

:) :)

The security guy they sent to the expo was from Gotham, unfortunately. So he found the couple to be completely normal. They? Should not have sent Thomas. He was hired BECAUSE his parents were Mad Scientists in the making. Batman was steering him away from a life of crime. Thomas could judge "normal" from "deeply unhinged" if it belly danced infront of him, in the seduction dance of a thousand, deep fried, mackerel.

It's his version of face blindness. Great with technology though! And the shield worked a treat. Even promised to be both ethical AND programmable! Not harming the ghosts it pushed out unless they try to force entry AND allowing them to program in exceptions. Allowing Heros such as Deadman to freely enter!

Is it a little janky looking? Yeah. But if it works, it works. They add it to the systems and flip it on.

One small and immediate problem. There is now a small knight shaped child in the engine room. She was NOT there a second ago. She has controlo of the ENTIRE Watchtower, claims to BE the Watchtower, and knows all their names. Knows a disturbing level of information about every employee on the Tower.

Oh and apparently "No one is leaving."

No one panic! Just unplug the... she has swallowed the ghost shielding unit into a wall. Slightly panic.

Panic lite.

Luckily, no one is willing to throw the first punch at what appears to be a small child. So the JLA Dark have a chance to literally run over.

They demand to know who's bright idea it was to add... "ectoplasm"? Was THAT the energy source? Oooh. Their departments probably in trouble. Later though, the hero's are trying to negotiate with a small child. Who is apparently a ghost.

It's not SAFE, she's insisting. Everyone has to stay HERE where she can protect them. From the nebulous threat of Bad Guys. They LEAVE and come back HURT. She is UPSET and everyone is going to STAY! Forever!

Not good.

Then Thomas pipes up, like the oblivious asshole he is, that he should PROBABLY call the engines makers. They did mention something a long these lines might happen.

WHAT.

You think, Thomas? Might be a good idea, maybe? Just a bit? YES FUCKING CALL THEM!

(All right, all right! No need to YELL! *ring ring* 'Ello? Maddie? Sorry to catch you at dinner-)

So now? There is a glowing college student, who was escorted here by a WEREWOLF, who just? Tore open reality? To some green, swirling hellscape? And popped through like "sup, sorry I'm late. Was in a council meeting!" And judging by the ficking CROWN and the various quietly panicking magic users, he probably didn't mean student council, and just?

Guess he's hear to talk to their newly sentient Tower.

Question! Asks Thomas, of the fucking Ghost King because of course he does, are they Dads now? Or if they already have kids, Dads AGAIN? Do they have to come up with a baby name?

.......oh dear lord, the Ghost King looks like he has to think about it.

What are we gonna tell our SPOUSES!? "Hey honey, guess what I got at work today! A NEW CHILD. They're a space station!"

@hdgnj @nerdpoe @ailithnight @the-witchhunter @hypewinter @mutable-manifestation

[ot3]

Why do you find little witch academia better than the owl house? Genuinely curious cuz I really like little witch academia. Hope you have a good day!

I think that akko is a much stronger protagonist than Luz overall because akko I think has more pronounced and consistent flaws to improve upon. I think Luz is really weakly written. I don't find her particularly interesting and I think most of the traits she's given are really shallow.

Additionally I think the core of LWAs narrative is much more strongly and consistently expressed. It's not super complicated - it's just a story about trying to find a balance between preserving tradition and moving into the future. But that tension is also echoed in the main character conflicts, which are akko and diana butting heads + akkos search for chariot

The thing owl house is going for narratively is "it's okay to be different and weird" but. Out of all of the owl house I've watched (which is most of it) that just... doesn't really land... because there's not a ton for it to be in conflict with. I get that the emperor's strict coven system is supposed to be the order and structure that luz and her scrappy crew are ultimately in opposition to but without writing a whole essay here I'll just say I don't think that works the way it needs to.

Additionally Luz is just... not that weird. She's friendly and gets along with most people and doesn't have any massive character flaws. So a story about how Being Different Is Good falls flat with a protagonist this bland. We also don't have any character who is consistently there to represent the Normalcy that luz is supposedly counter to. Amity is introduced in that capacity but they abandon that by episode 7 or whenever it is that they're at the library. Like there's some stuff with edas curse and whatever and with kings whole deal that I guess makes them outcasts in hexside society. But it just all feels kind of not functional in the moment to moment expression of this theme.

I think though the biggest problem with the owl house is that it's not very funny. I wouldn't care nearly as much about the ways the narrative is janky if watching the show was more fun but it's just not particularly entertaining tv. So all of the flaws are on full display since there's nothing to draw attention away from them

[ultraviolet-cello]

Good afternoon everyone, late analysis/detail watch for @tristampparty today! Had a busy day and I am ready to chill out by being so so normal about Trigun ^_^

Spoilers for Trigun Stampede and Trimax, CW for me discussing/theorizing abt Vash's injuries + discussion of harm coming to children specifically!

Roberto is my old man blorbo (he is not that old) and I essayed Hard about him today, good luck reading!

So when I originally watched this episode when I saw the tower I was like oh flying saucer haha!

and then it is a flying saucer. I hate that (/j)

the bugs under the rock when I lift it up:

On a more serious note I do like the transition from Wolfwood getting REALLY jumpy (to the point of like. Punching Vash for sneezing. babygirl there are better ways to cope with bringing the man you adore to what is probably his doo- actually there probably isn't, he's on his own) to them working extremely in sync to try and get away from the guards - even in the two months that they've been traveling together they've developed that back to back fighting style. It's very sweet, and I think that aspect of them is heavily emphasized in 98 actually, episode 9 when Wolfwood first appears. I really do miss that episode's story, I think it's my favourite standalone plot :]

Again take this with a grain of salt because my subtitles are Janky, but this line hits me real hard [Where Vash is telling Wolfwood not to shoot at the July guards]. They're at July, this is where Wolfwood needs to hand Vash over despite all his inner conflict; but he values the orphanage, it's so important to him. Would the morally righteous thing to do be trying to fight alongside Vash out of this? Possibly. But the risk is too great; It's not the time to be a saint.

Both of their expressions here - Wolfwood stepping back then forward to try and push Vash out the way, or block the bullet, and Vash just slowly lowering his arms with that real haunted look.

Studio Orange once again knocking it out of the PARK with their facial expressions

[Purging the Vashwood from my system for just a moment] He really does just. Grab him around the waist huh. He doesn't try to spin Vash around to assess the damage, or immediately drag him away, but most importantly he doesn't shoot back. Not after Vash asked him to.

Why's this bitch not clean his table!!! The hell!!! Unsanitary. Or... Or someone was just there. Not sure what's worse at that point. It's also that the shape of that cross is also to accommodate children

[Tucking these screenshots into my purse for safekeeping] [Also CWing this section for a little bit of injury discussion] Most of the injuries here aren't necessarily the scars that Trimax and 98 Vash have, which makes me wonder if he's going to get more post-July. In any case, a lot of these look like failed/only partial skin grafts or wounds that required skin grafts but did not get it [Just trust me on that, don't look it up if you can't stomach gore].

I wonder if Vash can't receive skin grafts due to the sheer amount of scarring/can't receive any donated grafts due to differences in biology, or if he's just... not been able to get them healed. Some of it appears to be patched up with metal, but the rest of it.... Mm.

Anyway!

I think it's very telling that the thing that Roberto starts really speaking up on is challenging Conrad on his treatment of orphans and disadvantaged people. Roberto's a reporter, so of course he's going to have seen how powerful people often use the marginalized as their playthings; and Roberto does have a pretttty good moral code when it comes to it. Time and time again he's chosen to help Meryl instead of preserve his own life.

And now he's actively taking Meryl's side, challenging Conrad, sticking up for people, which. One of the first hints of Roberto that we got that wasn't him being so gruff was his defense of Vash (who was getting the shit beaten out of him) in the very first episode.

I've talked at length abt how children are. Kind of the most precious thing to most people on Gunsmoke/NML - so many of the individual stories revolve around parents and children, brothers, siblings, Wolfwood and Hopeland, Legato sparing all the children in that village in 98, Elendira leaving a gaggle of children alive to bury Livio in Trimax. I particularly remember a scene in Trimax volume 14, chapter 3, when the feathers are falling and a young girl has lost her mother, but these big rough and tough men guide her back. I think that's kind of the essence of what Roberto represents to me.

The average person on that planet is rough, traumatized, probably knows how to shoot, they kill each other, they rob, they steal. And yet when it comes down to a little girl crying in the crowd, they will guide her back to her mother. Noman's Land is made up of families; they hurt each other and they commit atrocities, but at the end of the day, that was someone's child, and people try to respect it.

Roberto has a bit of a stronger ethical streak, but he's really kinda hostile to Conrad in this scene (GET HIS ASS ROBERTO WOOO!!!) and I think when he saw children involved that really signaled part of it to him.

It's also that Roberto has developed as a character, being more open and trusting of Meryl, but I also just. The family thing gets me every time (I think it's because I work with children and am a huge advocate for said children, but. yaknow)

[Pointing at him] I love this guy!!! I miss him!!! I really really thought I was gonna hate him but every rewatch i get sadder that he's gone!!!!!

Also he calls out Conrad on being non-empathetic towards, well experimenting on children which is yeah!!! shit!!! Roberto shuts him down like 3 times!! "What matters is how you feel with these children in front of you" GET! HIS! ASS!

Roberto has progressed so so much, with his ability to actually insert himself into situations according to his opinions and ethics, with his relationship to Meryl becoming softer, and then he's just,,, Gone, soon.

On a lighter note, tf you mean Elendira's powers are equivalent to a supply door Conrad she can kill a man!!! I spose a supply door can also kill a man but like. I wonder if she's gonna get. Bigger nails. More powers in the future.

Also a nice parallel of how Roberto kept dragging Meryl back and flinging her away from danger, but now he's grabbed her and is carrying her with him - it feels different. He really really does care about her and it's so evident in these last couple of episodes.

Also Meryl is just pick up-able what can I say.

Roberto being shocked at his ability to deflect Elendira's nails just feels kinda cruel. Man's been spending the entire anime facing horrors beyond his comprehension and he just figured out he can fight against this one, but in the end she's the one who gets him.

Also I talked about Roberto being really standoffish when he realizes children are being harmed? Uh, that's probably what gets him killed. If he'd have shot Elendira here, there is a decent chance he would have lived; if he hadn't hesitated the several times he did, he wouldn't be so rattled. That's... Painful.

"That was close" I hate everyone here [/j]

Not an unpopular opinion, but I'm not a super fan of what they did to Elendira. I'm of the opinion of her character divorced from her Trimax counterpart is really really interesting, but I have to treat her like an entirely different character, so we'll be moving on with that in mind.

So Elendira's been like this for what, twenty years at least? That doesn't seem to line up with how Plants age - Vash and Knives take like 5 years to look like they're fifteen, and. I hope we all know that humans typically take 18-20 years to reach adulthood lmao.

My three theories on why she hasn't aged is that

A) Whichever Plant cells (Probably Tesla's) that they used on her is inhibiting her growth, disallowing her from progressing past a certain point. Perhaps if she ages more something... Bad will happen to her body. Sub-idea, if it is Tesla's cells, they might not be letting her age past the point Tesla was when she died. Which is a little horrific actually.

B) Conrad and/or Knives are the ones not allowing her to grow, for some reason. I don't really have any ideas of what.

But it seems to me that she is somewhat inverse to Wolfwood; she's been living for at least twenty years, trapped in the mind and body of a child. She speaks with the cadence and articulation of an adult most of the time, but her body's pain tolerance and her subsequent reactions are that of an undeveloped mind/body.

That or she just doesn't wanna go through puberty because she's already trans and just doesn't wanna deal with that shit (valid) but, yaknow. I am a very big supporter of "Let Studio Orange cook, they've done pretty good so far!" but Elendira and Razlo are the two I am. Most scared of seeing how they turn out lmao, and even with Razlo I do have some hopes. But Elendira,,, man. I dunno.

Hooo boy. Okay. I'm ready to talk about Roberto again now. I've been talking about how he recently seems to have softened his demeanor specifically towards Meryl, bringing out a lot of that joking tone, but here is particularly on display.

He tells Meryl that it's okay to run away sometimes and that really really. Got to me. Like he wants her to live. He wants her to do whatever she thinks is right, and he wants her to live, and he is going to do what he can in his dying moments to make that better for her.

I miss him :(

I also wonder if he had anything outside of his job. Friends? Family? A partner? Or was he mostly obliterated along with most of July, kept only in memory by his, now Meryl's, derringer?

Also Vash does Not know that Roberto is dead and if he asks about him post-rejoining the gang in season 2 I'll start screaming.

Oh Knives is here! Yippee!!

So uh. The thing with him saying this is, like a Lot of things Knives does/says in Tristamp, is rooted in truth to some degree.

Like uh. Yeah. That is kind of the basis for a Major part of Vash's personality, the guilt complex of Knives shifting the burden and (honestly projecting a lot of his own guilt probably) onto Vash. But to attribute All of Vash's character to just that is disservice, and horrible for Vash to hear.

The thing about Vash is that he tries. He tries so so hard to make things right, even despite the harm that comes to him and the grief and pain of how he lives his life. Even if it were just his guilt, that is still 150 or so years of healing plants, helping children, going from town to town to do what good he can.

Love, in that case, is not inherent, but created. It's hard to just unconditionally love something just because it's in your life, but if you work at it, dedicate yourself, put in the effort, do so much good, then is that not love in itself? Does it really matter the basis if you love, regardless?

Where it becomes a problem with Vash, is when he refuses to kind of,,, accept that he worked for it instead of just having that love inherent to him, because he's so desperate to hold that guilt complex, that "I'm a bad person" close to him

I dunno, I'm autistic, so maybe I have a strange reading of this because I personally have had to work towards the things I hold dear to me, but it's,,, definitely a facet of Vash, to me.

I Do Not Like This Photograph. In Trimax, it seems they took Tesla and Immediately began experimenting on her - Some arguments over ethics with Rem, yeah, but overall the dissenters were overruled. But why have this picture? Tesla is clearly not a baby in this image. Did she have more contact and interactions with the scientists?

The cruelty in Tesla's story, at least in my view, is that she never got to be a character. Her agency was stripped from her by scientists, by death, and then by Knives. We don't know shit about her - did she die cursing all of humanity? Would she have agreed with Knives, that the pain inflicted on her was an example of the great atrocity of humanity? Or would she have decided people can grow and change, that she just got a bad lot, that people are messy and complicated but ultimately capable of love? Did she see Rem, and wonder if she knew humanity better than Tesla did?

We just don't know - will never know - and that's why Knives using her as an excuse for his actions is particularly egregious. Did her death traumatize him and irreparably damage his trust of humans, sending him down a spiral he was too unlucky to fight his way out of? Yes. Does that make it justifiable to try and commit a genocide under her name, assuming she would have wanted that even if there's a possibility she didn't? ....Definitely not.

millions-dykes referred to Conrad as looking "DILFy" in this scene and if I have to suffer that, so do you. sorry

There's a couple of bits of language in that ending scene that I find particularly uh. Interesting (derogatory) (deeply interesting and analysis-worthy), but I'll be saving those for next episode so I'll pop them in there :]

Today was a hell of an essay! Thanks for reading as always, I'm so >:3 about all the fun comments and ideas ppl have added on.

[welcometothejianghu]

Welcome to another round of W2 Tells You What You Should See, where W2 (me) tries to sell you (you) on something you should be watching. Today's choice: 有翡/Legend of Fei.

Legend of Fei is a 2020 adaptation of priest's webnovel Bandits that tells the story of a competent yet sheltered young swordswoman, the terrible gremlin boy who decides they're married now, and their various friends as they venture into the jianghu to acquire the legendary MacGuffin that will do ... uh, something, probably.

This show is a delight. It is pure goofy, tender-hearted sincerity. It has so many precious baby angels with adorably pinchable cheeks performing so many fetch quests in so many styrofoam dungeons. It is funny on purpose and funny on accident. It is 51 episodes of rollicking, slapdash, green-screened adventure.

I am trying real hard here not to bite on @agendratum's wonderful rec post for the series, which includes the words "discount word of honor with teens," a phrase that lives rent-free in my head. Go look at their work for a more detailed character guide. What I have here are a mere five reasons above and beyond said post that you should watch this darling little show.

1. All the production values of a sixth-grade class play

This show flopped pretty hard, and I can understand why. It was a highly anticipated drama with two big-name headliners. Fans expected a lot from it! And what they got is something that looks and feels like a mid-budget syndicated UPN show from 1993, complete with how all the high-schoolers are played by actors in their thirties.

This show is comically janky and earnest. Stunt people fall down before they're hit. Breakaway furniture abounds. Actors bounce gently off "stone" walls. Damn near everything was filmed on sound stages with greenscreens. (Filming ran from September 2019-January 2020, stopped for pandemic reasons, and finished March-April 2020. While this certainly is not the only cause of the show's jankiness, it definitely contributed.)

This it not a show with no money; this is a show with an appropriate amount of money spent poorly.

The flow and pacing of the story are as smooth as a car crash. So many times, a scene with Characters A and B will be happening, the show will cut (sharply) away to a different storyline, and by the time it jumps back, Character A is in a completely different location and Character B has departed. When did that happen? Why did that happen? Where are we now? No time to ask questions! Establishing shots are for weenies! This director knows filmmakers who maintain narrative continuity, and they're all cowards.

Speaking of the narrative: I've seen Saturday morning cartoons from the '80s with more depth. I would be hard-pressed to explain what exactly is happening that's driving the plot. There's big business with a deposed emperor and a forever war happening on some distant front and disgruntled veterans of the army that's fighting it ... but, like, it doesn't matter? All those machinations are barely relevant to the plot at hand, which can be summed up thus: Bad Guys want Thing, Good Guys go on adventures to stop them from getting Thing.

And I am listing all this messiness as a selling point -- as the show's primary selling point, in fact -- because I think it's all charming as heck. This show is plain, unpretentious fun. It's a downright romp! It's got a very teenager's-eye-view of the inscrutable situation driving the whole plot, which does a good job of drawing attention to how maaaaybe this whole situation is bullshit and the grownups should stop killing themselves and other people because of it.

Here's a good metric: If the Ye Olde Haixing parts of Guardian warmed your heart, you are in exactly the right frame of mind for this.

There's no way to tell how much of this campy, underfunded aesthetic was intentional, and how much was the result of both poor budgeting and way too many cooks in the production and screenwriting kitchens. I'm not going to say this was a labor of love, because it was at best a labor of like. Everybody onscreen is giving it their all, but no one's giving the same all as anyone else. Go into it expecting that and nothing more, and you'll have a great time.

2. Punching the Bechdel Test into next week

Are you someone who loves c-dramas, except for the part where you're like, gee, I sure wish there were some girls in this? Oh, my friend, there are so many girls in this.

I actually kept being stunned while watching it by just how many girls are in it. Old girls! Young girls! Evil girls! Nice girls! Rich girls! Poor girls! Strong girls! Weak girls! Just a whole lot of girls!

Truly, it's not just how many female characters there are, but the sheer variety of them. The main octet includes an awkward tomboy who can kick your ass, a spunky brat who's not above crocodile tears to get what she wants, and a soft femme who's a brave little toaster despite having zero martial arts skills. The show absolutely loves them all and thinks they've all got important things to contribute, no matter how hard they can or can't punch.

And that's before we get into how many female side characters there are, both heroes and villains. I've seen that some people hate on these side characters. Those people are wrong.

Maybe the best part is how much they interact. There are many scenes with multiple female characters in them, sometimes with male characters too, and sometimes just the girls. Because this is a jianghu story with martial artists, several of the female characters have unique skills that they pass on to other, younger female characters. Women are often the honored masters of things who have competent all-ladies support staff. And there's no sense that they wash out after a certain age -- even the grannies can still school you as needs be.

...Of course, the sad thing is, I'm touting all this ladyfolk representation when maybe 20% of the total listed cast is female (doing quick math from the MyDramaList cast page). Pound for pound, the Untamed's listed cast has a (slightly) greater female:male ratio, and nobody would call that a girl-forward show. It just makes a difference when what female characters you have, you push toward the front of the narrative and give them reasons to have relationships with one another, instead of making them occasional props in the background while real (read: male) people get to be people.

The entire reason the Bechdel-Wallace Test exists is not to praise or condemn any individual piece of media, but to comment on larger trends in the depiction of women in fiction. It's not a problem when one thing doesn't pass the test; it's a problem when nothing passes the test, or when the things that do pass skate by on single moments and technicalities. The more things that fail its three criteria, the more that indicates the prevalence of an attitude that regards women only as accessories to men's stories.

Legend of Fei is aware that not only do women have inner lives, but they relate to one another in very specific, culturally informed ways. The female characters in this are not just male characters with incidental she/her pronouns. Zhou Fei not only gets to be the protagonist who goes on the whole hero's journey of growth and change, but along the way she also gets to have some complicated interactions with her own gender and how much expected modes of femininity do and don't suit her. But it's also not because she's Not Like The Other Girls! It doesn't make her better or worse to be that way. It just makes her more like her mom -- and if there's one thing I know that makes a teenage girl break out into a cold sweat, it's the idea that she's anything like her mom.

This little drama is hardly some revolutionary piece of thought-provoking feminist insight, or anything like that. It's just that if you're feeling the lack of ladies in your c-dramas and wish to see girls on film (as it were), Legend of Fei may be what you're looking for!

3. Chaotic bisexual (asexual?) extravaganza!

priest's work is queer as fuck, and while this story itself does not rise to the level of being textually gay, there's still a great big rainbow flag flying over the whole business. You can rest assured that when two dudes or two ladies are giving one another meaningful looks, it is not an accident. We all know who's writing this.

Do you like relationship charts? Because I've got a doozy for you:

How many of these are me making jokes? Way fewer than you think.

There are of course some actual canon couples in there, and the amount of real estate they take up in the narrative means your affection for them will make or break your affection for the show. Fortunately, all the teen pairings are super-cute!

Zhou Fei embodies the bisexual stereotype of liking all the ladies and maybe one dude. Xie Yun falls so hard and fast for this beautiful butch-by-local-standards that his head spins. Together, they are the romantic backbone of the story, and they are just a treat.

I've seen people say these two have no chemistry, and I think that's bullshit, but okay, let's assume that's your read on it. You can still understand why they like one another, beyond your standard, he's a boy, she's a girl, what more do you want? Zhou Fei likes Xie Yun because he's funny, emotionally available, and socially unacceptable. Xie Yun likes Zhou Fei because she's fierce on the outside and warm on the inside. Sure, they're in love, but what's more important is that they're good partners and great friends.

(I think it helps that even though the characters are supposed to be around the same age, Zhao Yiling is literally a decade older than Yibito is, and he clearly thinks even off-camera that she's dreamy.)

Also, it's great when he helps her sheathe her sword. This is a couple that's going to take about three whole minutes to figure out pegging.

Li Sheng and Wu Chuchu are the normie couple. He is big strong boy-man! She is small helpless lady-girl! ...Except no, this is yet another case of a wife guy who thinks his girlfriend's strengths are awesome; it's just that in this case, her strengths are her brains.

The fact that her attack and defense scores are nearly zero does not keep Chuchu from being the most competent person in any given room. She starts out as the girl who's important because she's got an important dad and an important key item, but she winds up being basically Jianghu GameFAQs. She never stops being soft and pink and feminine and tender, and she never learns to fight worth a damn, and none of that keeps her from being a vital (if unfortunately kidnappable) part of the team!

Meanwhile, Li Sheng is never really a male chauvinist, because he's grown up under his aunt, who kicks so much ass. But he is a bit of a cocky teen-boy turdface who needs to get knocked down a few pegs. It's great, then, that the show pairs him with the kind of helpless femme that he's supposed to want, then has him decide the fact that she's miles smarter than he is is the best.

And then there's these dipshits.

Normally in c-dramas, I'm used to triangles that are a strong canonical line between the main guy and his girlfriend, a strong but unacknowledged line between the main guy and his best friend, and maybe a faint dotty wisp between the girlfriend and best friend. Not so here! Ying Hecong, Li Yang, and Yang Jin (L-R above) are a damn near equilateral triangle. I mean, okay, technically they're set up as a more conventional love triangle, where both boys like the same girl, and she does sort-of choose one of them in the end. But in that arrangement, you'd expect the boys to become rivals -- and they never are. In fact, they become special allies who trust and take care of one another more than they do anyone else.

They're a great weird trio. Ying Hecong is a poorly socialized weirdo whose special interests are poisons and befriending snakes. Yang Jin is the chief of Doctor Village, a position that he got not by being a doctor, but by being a dumb jock who didn't realize fast enough why nobody else wanted the job. And Li Yang is the spoiled little sister of Li Shen and cousin of Zhou Fei, prone to getting what she wants by pitching a damn fit about it, who has decided that both of these boys are hers now and she can do whatever she wants with them.

(Li Yan is actually the most Actually A Teen of all the characters, and is the one who makes me wish so much that more of the cast had been played by actual age-appropriate actors. Some character traits are adorably tolerable when someone's twelve and verge on really fucking annoying by the time that same person is twenty-five.)

If you are into OT3s where two partners have to join in solidarity with one another so they can survive their third, you've found your pot of gold. Each one of them is enough of a catastrophe that they need two whole love interests to manage them. Between the three of them, they almost make one well-functioning human being.

Now: A thing to note about all these relationships, and one thing that may be surprising to you about something adapted from a priest novel, is that this show is negative horny. All of the romance is extremely chaste. At no point does any grownup worry that leaving these teens alone with one another will lead to some hanky-panky. Nobody ever volunteers to chaperone, or seems to need one. The adults aren't particularly horny about one another either! This is the kind of universe where people blush while tenderly embracing, then go to pick their baby up from the local cabbage patch.

Even my jokes about Zhou Fei's fuckable grandpa are just jokes, because nobody actually wants to fuck him. They all want to duel him, or to fuss over his health, or to follow him around and bask in his nobility. He has two kids, but we never meet their mom(s?). He deflects the obvious interest of multiple beautiful women with ease. He is the perfect man, both fuckable and unfuckable at once.

This may be what's having people read the main pair as having no chemistry. They have a lot of chemistry! It's just not a particularly sexual chemistry. It's extremely tender and playful, and there's plenty of physical intimacy. But it's not horny.

And that's not on the two actors. I've seen both of them look at someone else like they wanted to eat that boy alive. That was a choice this show made, to play all the romance about as spicy as when the puppets on Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood hold hands. The only hints of horniness are in the fighting/injured bits, because sex is a big no-no, but nice polite violence is always okay! (Hey, uh, culture? We need to have a talk about this.)

4. The Grownups

As you may have gathered, most of this show is about the younguns. But a great deal of the supporting weight is carried by characters who are supposed to be of their parents' generation (even if most of their actors are only a decade or so older than the "teens").

I cannot fully in this post detail my great affection for every adult character; I wouldn't have room for anything else. So here's my top-three shortlist of the most memorable old folks.

If you like your ladies badass and crazy, Duan Jiuniang is here for you. Her grip on reality is ... well, it's complicated, but it doesn't stop her from being able to roast you from the inside out with her special skill. She's a terrible teacher and an even worse step-grandma who's made a lot of life choices that weren't what she wanted, but were what she needed to do to survive. I have no idea where she got those hideous leggings, but I kind of want a pair. She doesn't stick around past her one arc, so enjoy her while you've got her.

Speaking of crazy, the Phoenix, Mu Xiaoqiao, is a beautiful, tragic, genderqueer, completely insane middle-aged drama queen with a pipa to play and an ax to grind. I would watch an entire hundred-episode drama just about his campy antics. Hands-down my favorite character in the show. I'm not even going to say anything more. This bitch must be experienced. Love you, baby.

This fucking DILF. Holy shit. Shen Tianshu has a chocolatey voice and the world's most inconvenient prosthetic hand. At first his facial hair seems excessive, but then you see him without it in flashbacks and you're like, no! put it back! put it back! Frankly, I'm glad for the tufty brows, because this man does so much eyebrow acting, and you wouldn't want to miss a sinister moment of it.

And he's not the only one! Every single villain is running with full Bad Guy From A Power Rangers Episode vibes. No piece of scenery remains unchewed. They're what make this whole thing feel like you're watching a stage play. Every arched brow, every expansive hand gesture, every maniacal laugh, all of it plays to the nonexistent back row. (In fact, one of them -- Eyepatch Guy -- was so over the top that we had to look up his whole deal. Shockers, he's got an opera background.) If you have affection for the points I discussed in selling point #1, you will have love extra for the adult antagonists.

If you've ever watched a show made for a young audience starring young actors, you know exactly the grownup vibe I'm talking about. No, real adults don't act like this. But these are not real adults -- they are adults seen through the lens of a YA narrative, where everyone has big emotions and ultimately pretty simple motivations. Violence is acceptable but sex is not, and sexualized violence is especially not. You can threaten the kids but you (mostly) can't kill them. Parents should be removed from the main storyline, by death if necessary (offscreen preferred). By the end of the story, all adults must defer to the wisdom and battle strategies of the kids or be ready to be taken down by them. The lessons of age and experience are ultimately only useful once handed to the next generation.

Which is fine! ...provided it's the vibe you're expecting. I'd put this as another item in the list of probable reasons that this show did not go over as well as it should have.

5. We use every part of the Wang Yibo

Okay, so if you're like me, your introduction to this beautiful man was the Untamed, where 95% of his job is to keep every one of his facial muscles from doing anything -- and, if you're like me, you then watched some Untamed behind-the-scenes stuff and went, holy shit, this boy can make expressions?

This boy can make so many expressions.

I'm not going to argue that Wang Yibo was necessarily miscast as Lan Wangji, because that's not a fight I'm interested in having with internet strangers. I do, however, think it's undeniable that the Untamed misused him by all but ignoring his two primary skills: his giant goofy smile, and his being a dancer.

Legend of Fei makes use of both of these to great effect. Xie Yun is a gremlin who can't fight but can dodge. The show loves to leave the camera on him and let him spin and duck his way out of battles with his own mischievous grace. Wang Yibo does a remarkable amount of his own flipping and fighting, with and without wires. In a world of stunt doubles and smash cuts, it's a delight to watch.

My favorite thing about Xie Yun is that he likes that girl so much. He looks at her like she's the best thing in the world. He is her biggest hype man. He's all wife guy. Every time she's stronger and butcher and meaner than he is, he's pulling out his pompoms and cheering her on. He is in no way emasculated by the fact that she kicks so much more ass than he does. He is actually her wife, and he knows it. Kick their asses, baby, he'll be your flower.

Wang Yibo sells that devotion with each look in her direction. He brings every piece of his inherent chaotic good energy to the role. He's a comedic scamp right up to the point where he rips your heart out. If you are at all a Yibito fan, you owe it to yourself to get this show in front of your eyeballs so you can see what trouble that precious baby boy has gotten himself into this time.

Bonus: Do you like Word of Honor? Because this is how you get Word of Honor.

So I'm betting a lot of you did what I did, which was that you watched Word of Honor, and you loved it, so you went to read the book, and you were like, the fuck? Because Faraway Wanderers is also great, but uh, after a certain point, they're two very different stories.

While I cannot prove this, I would place a large amount of money on the screenwriter for Word of Honor's having been very aware of this production while doing the adaptation. See, in case you haven't read it, Faraway Wanderers itself barely spends a page of time with anything outside of what the main dads-and-kids quintet is doing, which makes for a fun danmei webnovel, but doesn't translate so well to live-action. I am almost certain that in the same way that they used frog DNA in Jurassic Park to fill in the gaps in the dinosaurs' code, this screenwriter (who is a priest fan) used Bandits/Legend of Fei to build out Faraway Wanderers' moments into a whole drama.

The timeline goes like this:

June 2010: priest publishes Qi Ye

October 2010: priest publishes Faraway Wanderers

November 2015: priest publishes Bandits

September 2019: Legend of Fei starts filming

June 2020: Word of Honor starts filming

December 2020: Legend of Fei airs

February 2021: Word of Honor airs

So yeah, it's not like the Word of Honor screenwriter could have watched Legend of Fei prior to penning the Word of Honor script. But there's too many similarities to be coincidence. To be clear, I'm not accusing the Word of Honor screenwriter of ripping off Legend of Fei. Watching it is more like seeing bits of Word of Honor's first draft. The Color of Ocean and Heaven and its five tokens become the World's Armory and the Glazed Armor. Wu Chuchu becomes Gao Xiaolian. Mu Xiaoqiao becomes the drama version of Xie Wang. All the nonsense with Yu Wenzhi and the Demons becomes all the nonsense with Zhao Jing and the Scorpions. Someone with more time than I have could probably make a thorough accounting of the number of times scenes with Wen Kexing and Zhou Zishu visually parallel moments Xie Yun and Zhou Fei have, and how often those scenes were in bits not related to the original Faraway Wanderers plot.

And I think this is great. It's why, even though a lot of Word of Honor was not in priest's original text, Word of Honor is still very priest-flavored. Frog DNA, you know?

All of which is to say: If you love Word of Honor, you owe it to yourself to watch Legend of Fei. It's much sillier and straighter, and it's way less sexually charged, but it's got a very similar vibe, and it's fascinating to see what the two have in common. Think of them as two distant cousins, where you're like, sure, I can definitely see how you're related, but ... huh.

Ready to embark on your journey?

So many options! It's on iQiyi (VIP), Viki, and YouTube.

We watched it on iQiyi, and the subtitles were ... well, they made some interesting choices. You could always tell what they meant, but the actual phrasing was often wonky. Occasionally, where you'd expect a "Dammit!" or "Crap!" these subtitles would have someone exclaim, "Screwed!" And we never stopped laughing about the poor villain whose name those subs rendered as "Pathetic Clam." I cannot tell you if the other subtitles are any more polished, but I can promise that the awkward translations just added to the charm.

Do I have a soft spot for well-meaning television that does not have the means to achieve its goals but tries anyway? You better believe it.

Just a pile of precious cutie pies.

[pearl484-blog]

I've been reading a bunch of advice on writing accommodations for disabilities (Replay has a disabled character with mobility issues which I am not as familiar as I'd like with) and I have a question/complaint.

Where are the descriptions of the accommodations that are half-assing it or don't work all the time?

For reference, I have autism. One of the things that I need is a quiet area when I'm becoming over-stimulated.

Usually, I use bathrooms. They're almost always available, always seperate from social areas, often have small areas where you can put boundaries between yourself and others, and usually quiet. Take me somewhere and the first thing on my agenda is "where's the bathroom?"

However, at my psychiatric work facility, we have special quiet rooms where you can relax and chill out in the quiet away from people. These quiet rooms have a lot of variety, and I can tell from a 2 minute inspection which ones are terrible and which ones are ones I'd like.

Like yeah, the quiet room is nice, but the walls echo every sound, the floor is waaay too hard and unforgiving, and it always smells like bleach. That's not a good quiet room.

They are all technically accommodations though, and part of me wants to know what would make someone with other disabilities go: "I can see whst you're doing. I can see that you're TRYING to help, and that's....sweet, but in all actuality, your accommodation sucks."

Yet at the same time, I see all these posts about good accommodations and how they'd benefit tons of people and that feels me with joy so I feel like crap wanting to be like: "yeah, being accommodated is great, but what's one way people accommodate you that just irks you?" Because I can see the strength and hope that arises from these posts. I can feel that in myself.

Yet I can't help but crave not just stories or descriptions of good accommodations, but stories where people are trying, earnestly trying to be good and help. They put braille on things. They have elevators you can always get to. They allow written OR spoken communication, but they fuck up.

The braille never cleaned and somehow always sticky or covered in...stuff. You don't wanna know, and you'd rather just clean it up than find out. The elevators janky and always stops either RIGHT above or RIGHT below the floor it's stopping on, so you either have to drop down or fight to bounce over that edge EVERY SINGLE TIME. And yes, written is accepted, but while you're writing, the conversation always keeps going so you're forever either behind or forced to confine yourself to gestures and short sentences.

Yes, it's accomodated, but it's not a great accommodation. So, does the character suck it up and deal with it, or complain about the little things that suck but they can live with? Do they try to fix the accommodations? Is there a point where those tiny stressers make them snap?

Are they resentful of these accommodations because they're not what they're used to? Are they grateful because its better than what they had? Do others notice the issues with the accommodations? Who are they and why?

What happens when an accomodation fails? How does the character react? How do the people around him react? Is the failure clearly visible to those uneducated in this accommodation? If it's not, do they assume the character is making it up? If so, why?

[gemini526sdumptruck]

The Residents of Dead End

These guys were a batch of OCs I made a year ago, and lately I just had the motivation to digitalize them (they haven't had any digital appearances until now). I finally came up with some kind of lore for them and where they live!

These objects live in a town known only as "Dead End". It's a place that's almost completely isolated from the rest of the world. Everyone who lives here is either a monster, looks rather deathly, just really twisted, or a combination of these. Traditions and cultures in Dead End are very different from any other place's, with them ranging from a little strange to rather macabre. Dead End's townspeople tend to not like outsiders very much, and so it's said by many people that entering Dead End is like a death wish.

Brief character descriptions under the cut

Lavender- Kinda the main girl here. She's the most reserved of all these guys. Lavender is gentle, friendly, and is said to be very calming to be around. She just likes to visit graveyards and ghosts from time to time.

Jig and Saw- They're twins who are essentially "soul bound" to eachother. They share the exact same thoughts and always finish eachother's sentences. Jig is super flamboyant and extroverted, while Saw is painfully dull and monotone. Jig knows how you will die, Saw knows when.

Nine- He's a cloud who rains (and leaks) ink instead of rain (or at least, it's assumed to be ink). Nobody really knows how or why, and neither does Nine. He's not one of many words, but occasionally he lets out raspy, whispery sentences.

Ody- Ody is a wind-up doll who also plays music. Particularly he likes to dance to the eerie melodies he contains, even though his movement is janky. He's got a surprising amount of snark to him, but everything he says sounds super cheery and saccharine, punctuated with a giggle.

Burnout- She's technically not...alive. Burnout’s essentially a hollowed corpse. Her eyes look black because she’s literally hollow inside. Some unforeseen force is controlling her body and basically puppeting it. Otherwise, she's a very outgoing kind of girl.

Cloaky- Nobody knows what object Cloaky even is, but because they always walk around in that cloak, everyone just started calling them Cloaky. Cloaky wants nothing more than to have a lot of friends who love and care about them. However, if you're around them long enough you may find that they are rather...obsessive.

Confetti- He's the resident party planner of Dead End. He appears to always be super happy and cheerful, and sometimes his sentences can come across as manic. He always wants to be sure everyone is happy and smiling and his parties are the best they can be. The theming of his parties are always eerie and creepy, but the residents of Dead End love it. However, when he's provoked or when his parties go wrong, he can get real aggressive real quick.

Chro- He's currently the oldest living resident of Dead End, which nobody would believe when you see how young he looks. However, this is because throughout the years, Chro has been stealing the youth from other (outsider) objects to make himself younger. He has a deep fear of the passage of time and growing older, and so why not find a way to stay young forever? He's a very cryptic and pessimistic guy, usually telling most outsiders that they don’t have much time on this Earth to fulfill their hopes and dreams, often insisting they never will.

Red- She's a butler who works for her master Ȕ̵̹̅͘n̶͇͍̘͒͗k̷͇̓n̶̤̿ō̵̤̮̯̈́w̵̩͝n̴͚̺̾̿̔. Red is very polite and proper, and always strives to please those she works for. She's very jumpy, on edge and is very protective of Ȕ̵̹̅͘n̶͇͍̘͒͗k̷͇̓n̶̤̿ō̵̤̮̯̈́w̵̩͝n̴͚̺̾̿̔. She's also a very great cook. They say she makes the absolute best things with rum.

Phantern- He's never lived or died, he's just a spirit who's been wandering around Dead End for a long time. He only speaks in cryptic rhymes, his voice ghostly and calm. He may look intimidating, but Phantern is generally very calm. He feeds off of souls, and he will only consume your soul if you have greatly wronged him or anybody else in an unforgivable way. He also has the ability to calm troubled souls. Phantern only appears at night, and even then he's still very hidden.

Haybale- He's a scarecrow farmer who basically grows most of Dead End's produce. He's a hard worker, and he's very proud of his farm. He's a little unhinged, with a lot of his plant growing methods being largely unorthodox and off putting. But many of Dead End's residents say his produce is the best in town.

[rubixpsyche]

What’re your headcanons for human!Vox?

Like: Name, specific nationalities, any preferences, what’s changed since he died, etc . Just !!! I love your headcanons so much I need to know more .

Asian!Vox hc

It's my lil baby ok it's my most precious hc to me. (Everything here is up to change because I have not had time to research the diaspora experience and era in which he lived in). Thanks so much for asking, I went overboard tbh this could be 3 posts by itself

Name: Without the best grasp and exposure to English names, someone cruelly suggested one as a joke when he arrived in America and he trusted them, only to find out too late to change it that it was bad, either because people could make fun of him for it, or because it was a name of a infamous figure of the time, and everytime someone made the same stupid joke about it for the rest of his career he got more and more frustrated. (I feel mean picking out an english name and saying it's a 'bad' or stupid one, so hey maybe I'll hold a vote or look up some history.) This constant fucking humiliation is what leads to him overdoing it with learning english, and why he named himself Vox in hell.

He had to live his life talked over, given a name he fucking hated. In death he would speak for himself. And for all these Sinners. This time He would be Their Voice. He'd even make them think it was their choice.

(I'll make up his traditional name later, excited to try)

Nationality: Hong Kong 🇭🇰 Hong Kong. Anyone who speaks Cantonese knows where I'm going with this HAHAHAHAAAAA. Oh I just want to make him swear so beautifully. He doesn't do it much at all in Hell, the internalized racism has him trying so hard to make people think he was white in life. Anytime he does speak canto he tries to pass it off as him having learnt the language for business. This works since he actually has learnt several more languages over the years because that fear of being misrepresented haunts him. With how technology has progressed, I think he would have learnt German, Japanese and Korean, so he could better ensnare newly deceased Sinners he knows worked in the big tech companies in life. Those NDAs don't extend here.

Sometimes he just stews because he knows he could insult someone so well, or at least in a way that will truly satisfy him, but he has to keep his trap shut and his language English. This is also why he gets so fucking flustered in Stayed Gone. He knows he could outperform Alastor EASILY if he wasn't slowed down translating himself. Also why he still uses old slang.

I can't control myself so, readmore time

Vark gets special rambling in cantonese priviledges. I think he is so (affectionately) mean to Vark. He can do that run-on insult thing for 15 minutes. Vark is just happy to be here. People think Vark is bad at listening to orders, secretly Vox has trained em to only listen to canto instructions. Anything in english just flies over his head.

Everything else: I keep just projecting people I know onto em. I think he had (and still does) a janky idea of what "Successful" people looked like, fashion-wise, and emulated it both when he was struggling to make it to now with all his success. Velvette is fucking dieing. That watch is tacky, she doesn't care how expensive it is, get rid of it. Oh my god noone wears chains like that anymore.

He pretends to like all that high-end cuisine and wines, but really he still loves proper savoury food and the cheap beers he had at home or at the places he gambled at (big gambler by the way. Not in a self-sabotaging way, but it was his only socialization outside of work, in life, where he could fucking relax and chat with all the other immigrants there) (they were milking him for all he's worth btw. My god). Everytime a proper chef lands in Hell he snaps them up in the hopes he can get really good food in his tower right at home.

Actually he's still a little bit superstitious, although sometimes he questions the point of that when they're in the Afterlife and have seen the 'answers' noone would ever get in life. It brings him some comfort though, and in some way makes him feel like he still remembers his life. He hates remembering his life but some part of it is so afraid of losing it and himself.

Preferences: To me he reads as someone that ENTIRELY misunderstood his attraction to men as just general admiration. He wanted to be those successful guys, he wanted their lives. Which was true but he was also a lil thirsty. I think he would have gotten a wife, because that was a sign of success, as would having successful/smart children. This is mostly dependant on how long he actually lived. If he died young, or if he was that dedicated to his career, he might not have courted anyone long enough to get married. They would not have been happy.

Even in death he still thought his attraction was just admiration, but he wasn't super resistant to the idea of allowing himself to 'start' getting into men when the general position of Hell changed. As in once sinners didn't give a shit and were openly all queer, he thought noone could give him shit for it, and acted as if he always knew, that he has sooo much experience. Faking it till he makes it. He just had really high standards, guys. Falls into Valentino's bed. Alright.

The 'point' of straight relationships, to him in life, was the nuclear family goal. But noone in hell can reproduce, so who cares!

I wanna nonbinary this fucker so bad but that's too much projection, perhaps, and honestly could be its own post since I would absolutely connect that to the Mechanical thing.

Oh I have/will have more next time, for now I wanna reply to this before it's been too long. Thanks again and ask me more anytime!!

[galkyrie]

@a-commas-a-pause

Jason could do this. After the literal weeks of being yelled at by the regular commentors on his recipe blog to buck up and ask the nice man who fixed his janky-ass photography out, he was finally going to do it.

It'd been about a year since Tim had stumbled onto his taking said poor photos of his creations on his phone, and, upon hearing the explanation, had volunteered his time to help with the pictures. Well- volunteered wasn't exactly the right word, since Tim kinda just declared that was how it was gonna be.

Jason had been less prickly about it when he'd actually seen the results of letting Tim do his thing. The photos often came out better than the food, each one looking ready to end up in some expensive coffee table book.

And Tim agreed to be paid in dessert, so it wasn't like he'd been losing out by letting him in on the ritual. The photos weren't even the part he did for himself, anyway.

So he got great, magazine quality photoshoots of his creations for the low cost of sharing a slice or two of what he'd made. It really felt like he was the one benefitting the most out of this arrangement- his baking wasn't even that good. It was just- stress relief, the kind of meditation that came with cleaning his guns or building a bomb- except he got to eat the results.

It was an arrangement that suited him just fine, for the past year. He'd even mentioned "camera-guy" in his posts, from explaining why his photography suddenly stopped looking like amateur shit and jovially talking shit about the lengths he went to get the perfect shot- Tim became a bit of a regular on his blog.

He hadn't realized how much until six months in, when a couple of his regular followers had begun...speculating about the man's intentions with his help. Jason found himself in the comment section of his own blog defending Tim's honor and insisting that no, "camera-guy" was not putting the moves on him in some elaborate display of skill- he was just like that. Generous with his time and effort and deeply dedicated to his friends, eager to help wherever he could. Tim just- he cared so much and so deeply about the people he cared about getting what they wanted- it never had to be romantic for him to be willing to help.

It wasn't until a few months later, when one of his regulars had joked about him being more effusive about the way the little lunatic had crouched on his barstool and angled his whole body to get the perfect shot of the shiny tart glaze he'd finally perfected, that he realized it...might be, a little, romantic. On his own part, anyways. Someone usually doesn't tend to wax poetic about the way someone's bangs fall over their eyes or their tongue pokes out of the side of their mouth when they're focusing, when they're not paying too much attention to that someone's mouth.

When that same commenter had followed up with a remark about seeing where that kinda focus and attention to detail would manifest in the bedroom, joking that Jason should drop his number so they could find out-

He lost the last shred of deniability. Seeing red, he blocked the user before he could think too hard about tracking down their IP and paying them a visit in person- and insane overreaction to someone joking about his "camera-guy" on the internet. He eventually unblocked them, and had to admit his followers might not be far off about his feelings.

It was easier to admit to a bunch of strangers, anyway.

Unfortunately, doing so had only encouraged the small group. Hell, they'd started picking apart his old posts for evidence that "camera-guy" liked him back- they started making bets on whether or when he would finally ask the guy out-

It was getting out of hand. If he had to hear that the way to a man's heart was his stomach so he was already basically dating him one more time-

Hence the plan. Which he'd formulated in a panic after discovering he'd missed Tim's birthday by opening the evening edition- make Tim a birthday cake, and see if he can get enough intel on his favorite foods to throw together a dinner- then ask him out.

He took a deep breath as he heard the familiar sounds of Tim letting himself in his front door.

He could totally do this.

[fandom-junk-drawer]

The Witcher Headcanon (Modern AU) - Food

Witchers were known for being tough. For being able to survive conditions a normal human would not be able to. Witchers were stronger, more resilient, resistant to disease, and able to heal faster than humans.

Their bodies were altered to survive on little food, water, and sleep, and to be able to metabolize the poisons they drank to fight. It was very hard to poison a Witcher. They were made to keep going.

Geralt was no exception. When he was on the Path, he could drive for days without proper sleep (sometimes no sleep), and he would only stop for food when he absolutely had to.

Before he started living with Yennefer and Jaskier, it was just him, alone, so he didn't really worry too much about eating and sleeping regularly. He could eat what he wanted, when he wanted, which, admittently was usually a sandwich or microwave item from a gas station. And only when he had enough money after buying fuel.

But then he met Jaskier, and things changed. He aquired an old van so Jaskier wouldn't have to sleep in the dirt on the side of the road, or crammed in the small truck Geralt had been driving. He had to stop more often so Jaskier could eat, or get a decent amount of sleep.

Geralt was a little annoyed at first. He wasn't used to stopping so often. He was a 'We aren't stopping until we get there' kind of guy, but now he had a fragile human to keep alive, so he grudgingly started making regular stops so Jaskier could get something to eat.

Gas stations became unacceptable food sources after a janky sandwich left Jaskier violently ill. Jaskier convinced Geralt (between bouts of vomiting) that eating (real, safe food) regularly was a good thing. Just because he could survive on little food (or suspicious gas station food), didn't mean it was a healthy thing to do.

"Why shouldn't Witchers eat well, Geralt? Why shouldn't they get a decent amount of sleep and take care of themselves?"

"Hm,"

"Because they're Witchers? That's a sh*t argument, Geralt."

"You keep your swords in excellent shape. You make sure they are clean, sharp, and in good repair. You should do the same for your body."

"Hmm."

Geralt thought about it, and admitted to himself that Jaskier was correct. Some of his contracts would not have been nearly as hard if he had been well rested and had been eating better.

He started making sure that he and Jaskier ate regular meals. If it was a quick stop, he made sure it was food from a deli, or other reputable place with actual sanitary food handling standards.

Although sometimes all they could get was questionable gas station food.

Jaskier *holding up two sandwiches*: "Geralt, would you like explosive diarrhea or projectile vomiting?"

Geralt: " I'll take the projectile vomiting."

And then he met Yennefer, and they decided to move in with Jaskier at his house in Oxenfurt.

At first Geralt stuck to his old habits of eating only when he was really hungry and he absolutely had to eat.

He started keeping a small hoard of food in his room. He couldn't really explain why. It was mostly bags of beef jerky, crisps, and granola bars. There were also a few honey buns sprinkled in.

He got over it after Yennefer caught him trying to replenish his hoard.

"Are you actually hoarding food? Like a f***ing hamster?"

"We have food, Geralt! And don't think I haven't noticed you not eating properly!"

"Well, maybe if you would f***ing eat with us three times a day you wouldn't be hungry."

You're supposed to eat three meals every day, you plank! And eat real food, not this junk!"

"You aren't on the Path, and even when you are, you don't have to worry about money for food, so you don't have to starve yourself."

You can keep your snack hoard, but you're going to join Jaskier and I for every meal, or there will be consequences. Do you hear me, Geralt? Consequences!"

"And give me one of those honey buns, I love those things."

Thus, after a brief adjustment period, Geralt got used to the idea of eating regularly. It was odd, sitting down to three full meals every day. He had been so used to being hungry all the time, that it was strange to...not be.

After a few months of eating well, Geralt noticed that his hair and skin looked better too. And then he noticed something else.

He was stood in front of the mirror in his room, studying his reflection. He turned this way and that, and looked at how his usually very well-defined muscles where kind of...soft looking.

Geralt had been concerned and mentioned it to Yennefer. The witch had rolled her eyes and told him he was being silly.

"You aren't supposed to look like a shrink wrapped string of footballs, Geralt. Normal people have a layer of fat under their skin that is supposed to be there!"

"Hm!"

"A Dad Bod? That's not a Dad Bod! And even if it was, so what? What's wrong with a Dad Bod?"

"Hmmm!"

"Oh, for f**k's sake! You aren't overweight, you muppet! You finally don't look like a starving wolf! Good gods, those don't even count as love handles!"

"Hm..."

"Stop being ridiculous! You aren't supposed to look like you've been vacuum sealed. That's just an unhealthy body standard pushed by idiots and morons."

Geralt wasn't terribly convinced at first, but he eventually realized that Yennefer was right. He decided he liked this new body. He noticed that he had more energy, fighting monsters was easier, he was recovering from toxicity more quickly, and he just overall felt so much better.

He did end up with a Dad Bod after putting on some extra weight over the winter when there was nothing much to do but sit around or go to friends and family for holiday celebrations with lots of food.

Geralt got to experience his first food coma that winter. They had gone to Madeleine's house for the winter solstice. She and Yennefer had made lots of food. Geralt had passed out on Madeleine's couch, with crumbs on his shirt front, gravy on his cheek, and his belt and the button on his pants undone to make room for his overly full belly.

More than a few comemorative photos had been taken while he'd slept.

He was self-concious after gaining the extra weight, but Yennefer and Jaskier never made fun of him, or made any derogatory comments. They never commented at all about his love handles, or the extra padding on his belly, which was kind of starting to loom over his waistband. In fact, they seemed to like this 'squishy' Geralt.

They were constanly huggng him, or snuggling up with him on the couch while they watched the telly. Sometimes they even made him lay on the floor and used him as their personal heated cushion.

There was just something comfortable and nice about a soft, warm Witcher belly! It was better than any old pillow or couch cushion.

Sometimes they even fought over who was going to get first pick of what part of him they were going to cuddle.

"You got to put your head on his pillowy boobs last time, Yen!"

"Yeah, well you got to sleep with your face in his tiddies for months!"

"That doesn't count, Yennefer! I was dealing with a traumatic event! I couldn't even enjoy it! And they weren't even this cushy!"

"Tough sh*t, f**kwit, it still counts!"

"It does not, you a**waffle!"

Geralt ended the argument by grabbing both of them and smashing their faces into his tits. The surprised yelps quickly turned into muffled giggles.

When the weather warmed up, turning back into Spring, Geralt spent a little time off the Path, getting himself back into shape. He set up a little workout area outside in the backyard, and put it to good use every day, unknowingly giving their elderly neighbor lady a nice little show.

[otakween]

Digimon Adventure 02 Best Partner Series - Part 2

Lol why are the girls' butts so emphasized in this artwork. Seems sketchy, but okay (Tailmon's even pointing to Hikari's butt, as a YouTube commenter pointed out).

Questionable art aside, I definitely thought these 6 CDs were a little weaker than the ones in my first post, but I'm biased. I don't have a very strong connection with a lot of the 02 characters, so it makes sense that their songs wouldn't hit as hard for me. On the other hand, I really like Ken and Wormmon so their album slapped. Anyways, full thoughts below.

Daisuke & Veemon

Google Boy - Daisuke (Listen here - subbed)

Daisuke singing about being a hot blooded shounen boy and how his goggles are a mark of his coolness and Taichi's legacy. A very Daisuke song lol.

Pretty funny how goggles just became a signature fashion statement for Digimon MCs. At least they kinda had a purpose in Tamers (although it wasn't explained very well).

Go Ahead! - Veemon (Listen here & Translation here)

Veemon's song is very in-sync with Daisuke. Just talking about having courage and rushing into battle without thought (because your squad will back you up and everything will work out! LEEEEROYYYY JENKINSSSSS)

2-Top - Daisuke & Veemon duet (Listen here & Translation here)

Okay, this was definitely the strongest song on this CD. It's catchy, the boys sound great together and the whole thing's a soccer metaphor which is very on brand. (I tried to google and see if "2-Top" is soccer terminology and came up with nothing tho -shrug-)

I like the little banter breaks in this and then in the song they talk about how their bickering just shows how energetic they are haha.

They mention being a digimon tamer in this song but did they even use that terminology in 02? I don't remember...

Miyako & Hawkmon

Crash with Bingo - Miyako (Listen here - subbed)

The lyrics of this song are pretty nonsensical, but I get what vibe they were going for. She's basically singing about being a hot mess but being proud to be herself. Also mentions that she's not just here to look cute.

I feel pretty neutral about Miyako, but I did appreciate that she could be kinda tactless and brash at times. Traditional Japanese femininity usually means being quiet, submissive and agreeable, which she definitely is not.

Although I've never liked the "bingo" catchphrase, it's fun in a song lol

Knight of Love - Hawkmon (Listen here - subbed)

Man, out of all the digimon partners, Hawkmon's gotta be the biggest nothing burger of them all. I couldn't tell you a single thing about the dude. I feel like the bird digimon are the most sidelined for some reason? (Maybe they're like "little boys don't care about birds, they like dinosaurs and bugs!")

Hawkmon sings about being a "knight of love," but I never got "knight" vibes from him really. I guess he kinda talks like a knight, but nothing in his design says knight...he's supposed to look like an Indigenous person, no? Maybe I'm being to literal hahaha

Fly High - Miyako & Hawkmon duet (Listen here - subbed)

Yeah, I don't really buy Miyako and Hawkmon's partner chemistry. They sounds more like coworkers lol. I did like the part where Miyako was asking to talk to all of Hawkmon's digivolutions in quick succession, that was fun.

Miyako's just spiraling the whole song and Hawkmon's trying to comfort her but she seems to be kinda brushing him off for most of it haha

Iori & Armadimon

My Conclusion - Iori (Listen here - subbed)

This song was...not good. Not the worst of the bunch, but it kinda just felt like it had no melody and Iori was talk-singing the whole time. His voice is cute and the lyrics fit his character nicely, but I was thrown off by how janky the song itself sounds.

The song is about Iori's convictions and what evil vs. justice means to him. You can sense that his philosophy is coming from his kendo practice.

I enjoyed the gratuitous English in the final line lol

Omyaa to Let's Go! - Armadimon (Listen here - subbed)

This one had a good energy and I liked the "Let's go!" chorus, but there was still a lot of talk-singing going on

I hate that the song starts by mentioning that damn Chuu x2 Jelly...it's like the show forgot to give Armadimon any memorable qualities so when they wrote this song they were like "he liked jelly...I guess?"

Armadimon losing steam and kinda flubbing the lyrics was the best part of the song lol

A Message to the Future - Iori & Armadimon duet (Listen here - subbed)

Phew, finally a good one. I was a bit worried I'd dislike this whole album. I really liked the melancholy yet optimistic vibe this one had. It kinda feels like any two characters could have sung this, but oh well. It was a nice duet regardless.

Armadimon telling Iori that "no matter what kind of adult you become, you'll always be Iori" was sweet :)

Takeru & Patamon

Focus - Takeru (Listen here - subbed)

Okay this one made me MAD because it was so ship-baity!! What the heckk??? This song is clearly implying that Takeru has romantic feelings for Hikari ("Am I the focus of your heart?"), but the show led me to believe that his feelings were platonic and almost brotherly. Did I watch the same show as the song writer? I don't mind them as a pairing, but I feel like this is contradicting my interpretation of the anime so I'm just confused.

Aside from my grumblings, I think this song was great for the drama of it all lol. I also liked the callbacks to Hikari and Takeru growing up together and Hikari blossoming into a powerful young hero.

The comment section of the YouTube video I've linked have people arguing whether the song is about Hikari or Patamon lol. Ain't no way this song is about Patamon. There's even a hikari pun in there.

Don't Stop Patapata - Patamon (Listen here - subbed)

Not sure if this is cute...or just annoying. Sounds like a song written and performed by a toddler, which is fitting cuz it's Patamon.

This song captures Patamon's one braincell energy (which was on display in the new 02 movie). He doesn't really sing about Takeru much which feels a bit like a wasted opportunity.

Steppin' Out - Takeru & Patamon duet (Listen here - subbed)

I liked the theme and lyrics of this one but the vocals were pretty rough...It sounded like Patamon's VA didn't match Takeru's VA's energy very well and together they sound kind of off key.

Takeru singing about taking off his ripped shirt kinda made me laugh because I pictured like a sexy romance novel cover dude. So not Takeru's image.

Seriously Patamon just kinda sounds disinterested in this song

Hikari & Tailmon

Gentle Rain - Hikari (Listen here - subbed)

Kind of a boring, slow song, but I liked the overall theme. Hikari's showing her vulnerable side and talking about how she can't be strong/brave at all times.

I'm not sure I really understand the rain metaphor here...I think maybe when she's saying it's not an "intense rain" she's saying it will take a long time for her weakness to wash away, but that's okay? IDK, kinda clunky.

Getting up - Tailmon (Listen here & Translation here)

Pretty similar to Hikari's song, but more melancholy. I found this one kind of relatable because I can get existential pretty often. The lines "What can I do? I still don't know. Because I was born my journey continues" hit me.

Tailmon sings about, basically, how life as a digimon is tough and confusing, with all of the nonstop battling. Still, she wants to stay strong for those she needs to protect. (Tailmon kinda has similar vibes to Renamon...or maybe it's just that they both have deep voices.)

Shining Star - Hikari and Tailmon (Listen here - subbed)

This one felt kinda half-assed lol. I think I might just be getting burnt out with all these songs that effectively have the same message.

So yeah, just like a lot of other songs in previous albums, this was a generic song about Hikari and Tailmon being different but loving each other anyway and striving to be their best for each other. I guess it's nice to hear a more optimistic song at the end of the album since the first two were pretty downbeat.

Ken & Wormmon

ONLY ONE - Ken (Listen here - subbed)

Aw man, I'm disappointed that Ken's solo song is from the POV of his Kaiser days :/ oh well. It's still a fun song. I like his evil laugh at the end.

I think this song does a good job of illustrating Ken's internal struggle between good and evil, but always turning to the darkness in the end. I also enjoyed the rock n' roll vocals.

The Future You Dreamed of, The Future I Dreamed of - Wormmon (Listen here - subbed)

Lol Wormmon's such a simp for Ken, but I love him so much 😭❤️ This song was great!! The jazzy instrumentals, the back up vocals and the passion/love in Wormmon's voice were all on point.

This song is all about Wormmon not giving up on Ken and understanding he has good in him that he wants to protect. So pure and sweet <3

True Strength - Ken & Wormmon (Listen here - subtitled)

Omg I loved this one 😭😭😭 so precious! Sure, it may have the exact same theme as a bunch of other songs ("we're so different, but we love each other!") but it definitely has a greater impact considering Ken and Wormmon's baggage.

I loved the light and jazz vibe of this song, I was picturing Ken and Wormmon in tuxedos with tails doing a lil tap dance routine together.

"Your form reflected my heart" omg 😭😭😭

Ken had a whole mini arc in just this album lol

[magadauthan]

Ep 13: Vash the Stampede

@trigun98watchparty The Pain and Suffering Trigun Arc has begun, which must mean it's time for....

...a clip show! Woo hoo!

For the fic writer (me) it's helpful to see what the insurance girls are actually doing. They must be working on Vash-related claims (and, probably, non-Vash-related claims) while they follow him around.

...that would be a fun little fic. "This one was you... this one was you... this one was you..." "IT WAS NOT!"

--I wonder whether Meryl and Milly were ordered to follow Vash, or whether Meryl applied for the posting because of ambition / opportunities for advancement. I'd like to think the latter.

--Meryl having a terrible time with what to write and how to write it is hella relatable. Balancing truth, half-truth, and personal feelings into professional talking points - let alone making it palatable for the higher-ups - is not easy.

--Besides that, she has to paper over why she didn't recognize that Vash was Vash. Half the reason she's so mad at him at the beginning is that she was expecting someone who fit the legendary description, and instead he's a big doofus. What a disappointment!

--And then, horror of horrors, Vash starts to grow on her. How embarrassing. Guess Vash's ridiculous finger-gun hit the heart of a lady after all. Poor Meryl.

--The apparatus Meryl uses for coffee is called a Siphon. Does she carry that thing around? Apparently she runs on caffeine and aggravation.

--Milly runs on tea and amiability.

--OH YEAH, SHE'S ON A ROLL NOW, GET THOSE WORDS OUT WHILE THEY'RE FLOWING GIRL

--"Everyone who has become involved with him has somehow regained an emotion which was once lost." (what's yours, Meryl?)

--She's so confused. Who is he? Who is he, really?

--DUDE. YOU JUST BARGED. RIGHT INTO HIS ROOM. DID YOU EVEN KNOCK.

--Vash is remarkably calm and welcoming for someone who's just had his privacy massively invaded.

--OTOH it's rather nice that Trigun slyly subverts the stereotypical "shower scene."

--Why does he have sweats on right out of the shower? Is he a never-nude?

--"I wouldn't run away." Freudian slip!

--The English translation is janky in several spots, and this is a big one. Meryl is supposed to say "Won't you stop living the way you do?" Vash's response of "I can't until I've buried my past" doesn't make sense in the English because the translation isn't correct.

--those eyes, tho. Meryl is so sunk. She's done.

--Milly, you stinker. She knows what's up.

--Meryl you just jelly now lol

[tiredspacedragon]

BIONICLE Retrospective

2002: The Bohrok Swarms

Part 1.4: What Lurks Below

*ahem*

Anyway.

What I'm learning as I go through these comics is that, unlike the novels, which are written to be satisfying reads on their own, the Bionicle comics are not meant to be looked at in isolation, one issue at a time. At least not when they are portraying the events of the main story.

See, exactly what the comics cover is never consistent. Some years, the comics stick closely to the main beats of that year's story. They'll cover all the main battles and important scenes from the books or movies, they'll have much of the same dialogue, and so on, like a visual summary of the year. But other times, the comics stray away from the main plot to tell unique stories not found anywhere else, and in my opinion that's when they're at their best. That's why I liked To Trap a Tahnok so much, while I feel I have to come down hard on What Lurks Below.

To be fair, these comics are the first depiction of the events in the Bohrok Nest. The story they tell is not adapted from any other media, it was written for this medium. So it is, technically, an original story. So maybe what I'm really getting at is that the comics aren't the ideal medium for conveying the central plot in general. There's just not enough space to pace everything properly.

Case in point, this issue has really big Part 1 Energy. It doesn't feel complete. There's no clear narrative arc to it, it's just a series of "and thens." The Toa escape the lava by passing through an illusory wall, and then Tahu joins them by blowing up the Tahnok nest he was trapped in, and then they fall into the chamber the Krana are meant to be placed in, and then that opens then door to the Exo-Toa armour, and then the battle with the Bahrag starts.

Now, it's worth noting that this kind of narrative structure is not inherently bad. In fact, it's a structure often used in myths and epic poetry. Ancient stories, particularly ones that would have been transmitted orally, of gods and heroes and monsters, didn't always have clear causal storylines, often they were just series of adventures, sometimes with clear morals, sometimes not. And given how Bionicle itself is often portrayed as a legend, this kind of structure does seem somewhat appropriate.

And if that was the point, I would say it's actually rather clever. But I don't think it is, because if it was, more of the comics would be like this, rather than just this issue. No, what I think happened here was just a case of janky pacing. This issue could have just been about the Toa's journey through the tunnels, and left the discovery of the Exo-Toa and the confrontation with the Bahrag for the next issue. Or, it could have saved time and skipped the tunnel segment completely to focus on the main conflict. As is, it's all setup and no payoff, which is what I mean by Part 1 Energy. It feels more like the first half of the issue that follows it, and less like its own entity.

On the other hand, I do suspect that's actually intentional. The point is to build suspense and keep readers excited for the next issue. And fair play to Greg, as an issue of a bi-monthly comic, I have to commend What Lurks Below for doing its job well. But as an instalment of a story, a chapter in the tale of the Bohrok invasion, I have to say it does not hold up so well upon revisiting.

Now to stop being a major downer for a moment, stepping away from the big picture and looking at the little things shows that What Lurks Below does have merit to it. We have the first appearance of Makuta's belief-based illusions, which, while they go unexplained here, have always been a plot device/mechanic I've found fascinating.

And we get some good character moments from the Toa as well. Lewa saying "There's nothing [Pohatu] and Onua can't bring down," is unbearably sweet, that unshakeable faith in his brothers only feeling more powerful in light of Lewa's own current vulnerability. Not to mention the display of cleverness from Lewa in figuring out the illusion, and from Tahu in using his power to heat the air and cause an explosion, blowing himself out of the Tahnok nest he'd been sealed in last issue. I think that moment where he explains what he did, his speech notably slowed, is the first time, and one of the only times, we've actually seen Tahu visibly weakened and exhausted. So points for expanding the Toa's characters.

...Unfortunately, looking at the little things also means seeing the little downsides, and there's plenty to nitpick here. Why is there lava out of nowhere, and where did it come from? Why are all 48 Krana required to open the doors to the Exo-Toa, which are supposed to be a failsafe? What are Cahdok and Gahdok even doing in separate rooms when they're nigh invincible together, especially since they've been together every other time we've seen them anyway? And, what stuck out to me most, why is Gali the narrator of this issue? Her specific perspective doesn't add anything to the story, and actually gets dropped around halfway through the comic anyway. It's just...odd. This whole issue is a series of odd decisions. Some understandable, some not.

Anyway, on to Part 2!

Next up: The End of the Toa?

[deltaruinedcoco37]

SplatoonMG4 CHAPTER 1: The Gays Meet for the First Time

(Third person)

It was currently…daytime.

Probably?

Well, that's all SMG3 could make of it. Wearing a watch just never really seemed too practical, considering that he would never need to know the time here. He just needed to go through his schedule. Was it a schedule, actually? No, more of…an instruction manual.

STRIKE MAP GUARDIAN 3 (Suction-Cup Lookout - Octoling Strike)

Always be on the lookout for members of the New Squidbeak Splatoon, especially their latest recruit, Agent Four.

If an NSS Agent is seen, immediately alert all Octoling soldiers around the map to guard the Mini Zapfish. Your map is Octoling Strike, a replica of the Inkling battle map "The Reef", and you should remain hidden in one of the many buildings around the map. Avoid engaging in battle at all costs.

If the map's soldiers are defeated, you must rush them to the nearest Respawn platforms as quickly as you can. Release at least ten Squee-Gs and evacuate until the map is cleared of all ink before sending the Octolings back in.

If confronted with no escape, we have supplied you with one weapon from our limited supply. Treat it with care, and do not break it.

DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, REMOVE YOUR HYPNOSHADES.

To be honest, sometimes SMG3 wasn't sure if the last instruction on the page was real. Maybe he was just imagining it. He did a double take, and-

-

-

-

What was he doing again?

Right, he was going to…check the Mini Zapfish capsules.

That was it.

Although, sometimes this job seemed a bit pointless. Why keep going? Why not just let them rest for a moment, why not just leave now? He had been so busy with this shit that he'd missed Octavio's concert. Oh wait, wasn't it 'Dj ZeR0' or something like that? Kinda cringy honestly.

So many people had left, yeah. Why not him? Why stay here? What was keeping him from-

-

-

-

What was he just thinking about…?

Suddenly, he heard a sound that was all too familiar to him…the sound of a certain Respawn platform linking to the soul of an Inkling.

Well.

Looks like it's time to start blasting some sweet Turquoise October in here.

~~~

"Octolings!"

Yeah, Four knew. Mario really didn't need to tell him that, but whatever. Not like he could just tell his boss to get off the line.

Agent Four, the newest NSS Agent, sighed. "I can't believe they're still trying to steal our power! Who are they even working for anyway?…I thought Zer0 was captured. Safely this time."

Luigi, the brother who originally recruited him, thought for a second. "W-well, we don't really know…since, m-most of them left, or we freed… It could be the ones that aren't free yet?"

That was kind of solid, Four thought, Maybe he's onto something. Hey, wait- is he right?… The blue-haired Inkling squinted at the Octolings. Are they still wearing Hypnoshades?

"Is it okay if I try something a little different?" he asked the brothers. They hesitated for a moment before Mario said yes, because they knew that even if he was splatted, he had a few lives left on this janky Respawn platform. Also, Mario liked dangerous stunts and chaos.

Four grinned. "Okay. Now let's see who's behind this all!"

First, he grabbed Belle's (Sheldon's) drone and turned off the Superjump target. Which was probably the most dangerous thing an Inkling can do, but that didn't matter, he had extra lives! Now it was time to launch himself at high speeds to a random spot in this place where he could end up anywhere from exactly where he needed to be to an Octarian dumpster in the city below.

C R A S H

Goddammit, that fucking hurt. Not really, since Inklings are strong, but yeah…who would've expected this? Who could've possibly expected that with infinite possibilities, one of them could be crashing through the side of a fucking building-

"AGENT 4! A-ARE YOU OKAY?!" Luigi was terrified, and for good reason. This was uncharted territory for the NSS…an Octarian city…

Wait, no. It was just one of those fake buildings the Octarians made to mimic The Reef. No wonder it was so empty.

What's that over there?

Was that…

A…

ZAPFISH?!

Whoa. Four didn't think he would find one of these little guys so unguarded…why was its capsule just sitting here?

"[Inkling.]"

He felt the uncomfortable sensation of ink that wasn't his own color touching him.

An Octobrush, and an Octarian…holding it to the side of his face. More specifically, an Octoling with violet tentacles, wielding a rather powerful-looking brush stained with magenta ink… definitely not a soldier, but what?

Carp. How would he even get out of this?

"[What's one of YOUR KIND doing here?]" the Octoling screeched. "[You've taken EVERYTHING. Our electricity, our king, our time, our LIVES. And you have the NERVE-]" he harshly glared at the Inkling- "[-to just BARGE INTO my workspace?! You…you absolute fucking dipshit!]"

Uh oh, that Octoling sounded…mad… Four thought.

Which was why it was horrible…that the Agent didn't understand a single word of the Runic that was being spoken.

"U-uuh, you're completely mistaken!" he exclaimed. "I-I'm one of you! Definitely! See, I…I knew the way here!" Four's eyes darted around the room for a second before he pointed at the hole in the wall. "Oh, wait…"

Yeah, he was not making it out of here alive. He just…uh…had to listen to this guy monologue for another minute before the sweet release of death- well, not really, since the whole Respawn platform thing. Wow…this guy will just not shut up. He must never get to monologue to anyone, that sounds…sad. :(

"[…And finally, after SO MANY defeats…we- no, I will strike you down, Agent Four!]" the Octoling yelled. "[Since I'm Strike Map Guardian 3, or SMG3, I've always felt like it has been my duty to…]"

Okay, this was actually kind of sad now. When will he stop…

Wait, 'SMG3'? That didn't sound like a word in Runic, Square, or Round…sure, maybe it was in Halfmoon, Bold, or Sign, but probably not since those were Inkling languages. Was that…his name?

He did hear about some Octarians from Beaker's Depot not having proper names.

"Uh- th-that's…cool! I'm sorry, but I have to get going…yeah…I'm totally one of you guys, so I have evil crap to do! My name is SMG4!" He weakly smiled. "Can I…"

SMG3 was not impressed. No one would be, though, the only thing really impressive about this was Agent Four's sheer stupidity. Lying to an Octoling. As an Inkling. About being an Octoling. While speaking in an Inkling language. Fucking idiot.

It wasn't a surprise when the Map Guardian finally smacked Agent Four to the ground with his Octobrush, leaving the Inkling with barely any HP… but he was still alive, and mildly annoyed now. "Hey! What was that for?! I listened to your villain monologue…"

At this point, Mario was done with just listening in silence. "Agent Four! You've gone coo-coo crazy if you think you can still get out of this! USE VIOLENCE!"

Unfortunately, it was loud enough for SMG3 to hear. Suddenly, his Hypnoshades flashed a bright red and he raised his Octobrush. "NO!" Mario screamed. "THOSE RESPAWN POINTS COST A FORTUNE IN POWER EGGS TO USE! YOU CAN'T DIE!"

Agent Four quickly shifted into his Squid form and began charging up an attack, deciding to try out that new Splatlandian technique. There was a flash of recognition on SMG3's face where he knew he'd seen that before, from other Octolings with experiences outside Octo Canyon. The people who were born on the surface, sometimes (mistakenly) captured and brought underground, had showed him…

Squid Surge. No no no- Four was going to- Three had to get out of the way!-

-

-

-

SEEK AND DESTROY

He swung his brush just a millisecond too late. He didn't want to. He had to. But why he did wasn't what mattered, the only thing that mattered now was that he would never be ordered around like this anymore. Blue ink stained his face, and he heard the Zapfish's capsule being shattered. The lights shut off in the building, leaving only the light coming in through the window from the screens that lined the Octoling Strike map's dome.

SMG3 heard the rush of ink that told him that Agent Four had launched himself out of the building, and probably the Octoling Strike map too. Everything was so much…clearer now, for some reason, the sights and sounds in reality.

A pair of Hypnoshades lay on the ground in front of him, cracked, flickering, broken.

~~~

AAAND there we have the first chapter of SplatoonMG4! If you're new to this, check out the pinned post on my blog for SplatoonMG4!

See y'all soon!

- Coco

~~~

Next (Ch. 2)

[flowerbloom-arts]

The Clockwork Muddler

(another fanfic idea/concept/AU by me that other people can use, just please @ me and stuff I would love to know if you do)

Summary

Stumbling upon the aftermath of an accident never meant to be seen by anyone, a young Moomin(pappa) finds out that the Muddler is some sort of... Mechanical being. Moomin is completely horrified by this discovery, but before he could do anything the Muddler grabs him by the arm and tearfully begs him not to tell anyone, and that he'll do anything he pleases if it keeps him silent about the whole thing. Moomin, not being one to pass up an opportunity, agrees to this on the condition that the Muddler follows his every whim.

Tensions rise as Moomin sees him as far less of a person and Muddler tries to please him as best he could, and although they don't say a suspicious word of the incident, everyone else notices the strange change in their dynamic. It's only a matter of time before tensions rise to their heights; and that Moomin discovers another devastating truth.

Concept explanation

So basically this whole thing is an allegory that can apply to many things and it has alot of literal metaphors but if one were make too much of a detailed lore/explanation of the central concept then the need for logic would supersede the central message of the story.

To simply describe Muddler I would say he's basically a steampunk/clockwork android but not in a super literal techy way. It's kinda like the gems in Steven Universe, they are technically light robots but they still have bodily fluids and human emotions and the ability to digest food and stuff, you know?

Muddler's been adopted by Hodgkins since ages ago, they're not biologically related, but Muddler and Hodgkins still call the people who took care of him previously his "parents" and "uncle/nephew" are like petnames for eachother because they grew such a close bond.

Muddler is really janky on the inside, alot of loose ends and problems that cause him to be clumsy and overemotional and fixated on his collection. He also lost the lid for his chest a long time ago (probably back when he was still with his parents) and so his insides are constantly exposed but hidden under the layers of clothes he always wears.

The story takes place like... some time after Muddler's wedding. Moomin(pappa) is a very dumb and naive kid with a huge ego (I'd say he's around 16-17 while Muddler is atleast perceivably 21), and Moomin has alot of inexperience with the concept of sympathy or empathy due to his upbringing and what little he does have is relegated to Hodgkins, because Hodgkins is Moomin's favorite and most important person in the world while everyone else is just, whatever.

So when he finds out about Muddler with his gut gears spilled and trying to fix himself up quickly he freaks the heck out because holy crap did his reality just shatter right that moment. When Muddler begs him not to tell anybody he's still trying to process but gives into his offer because he's an egotistical brat with an unstable, warped self-image and who doesn't care about anybody but himself and Hodgkins.

Moomin gets progressively bitter towards Muddler because Muddler has this really cool uncle who's really nice to him and Joxter is also really nice to him and he already has a wife while Moomin doesn't get anywhere near the affection Muddler receives, even though he thinks Muddler isn't a real person but he himself is the realest person he's known his whole life. He is slowly inching closer to telling on Muddler anyway, and he doesn't even know that Hodgkins already knows. He even starts calling him a clock in his head to further dehumanize him.

During the height of this tension, Muddler and Moomin have a private conversation/argument which culminates into the reveal that Hodgkins knew, Moomin asks why in the world because he's already built up this bigotry towards Muddler in his head and Muddler starts getting all sentimental talking about his backstory. And then he looks at Moomin sadly;

The Muddler reached out for the Moomin's chest.

A click rung out in his head.

"Hodgkins always had a fondness for machines, you know. He seems to have this sixth sense for finding one," the Muddler said kindly. "The broken ones, most usually, we seem to be easier to spot with those ears of his."

No no no this can't be, the Moomin thought, he can't be like him!

The Muddler continued softly and sadly, "You told the Hemulen Aunt you were found in a seashell padded with velvet, yes? Excuse me, it must've been nice to be treated so gently and elegantly as a small one."

A shopping bag padded with newspaper...

The Muddler opened the Moomin's chest to reveal the dusty and rusty clockwork in him, "Oh dear," the Muddler covered his mouth, "I thought since you were so clean... Perhaps your Hemulen didn't bother..."

A thousand 'no's repeated themselves in the Moomin's thoughts, this cannot be true, he has to be a real person himself. He has to be! Because if he wasn't, then...

They locked eyes. Sincerity and concern met with earth-shattering terror. A pause.

"Oh," said the Muddler finally, "I'm sorry."

-

Moomin himself is made of clockwork, that's why he was different from the other Moomins and had those clicks in his head when he got ideas. His old Principal didn't even bother figuring out what he even is, let alone take care of him properly, his insides are all rusted and somewhat malfunctioning.

Moomin spirals and thinks that all the things he thought about Muddler applies to him aswell, that everything he tried to do since his escape are rendered null because he's not a real person and fake people can't become Famous Adventurers, they can't be liked or belong anywhere if people knew.

Moomin starts denying everything but he knows it won't do anything and he breaks down crying.

The Muddler looks down at him, feeling pity wash over him. Despite the cruelty and bitterness Moomin treated him with he can't help but feel bad for this child who had his whole world crash down on him. Muddler pats his head, and then Moomin receives the first hug he's ever had in his life.