#which… does that usually happen after covid

[heartual]

why do i feel like i’m getting sick again 🧍🏻‍♀️

[pa-pa-plasma]

the thing people rarely talk about is being unable to tell if you're sick or not because you already have these symptoms chronically. like yes i still have a cough, but all the other symptoms of long covid are basically normal for me

[posthumanwanderings]

guys I’m probably gonna stop with the whole youtube thing or take an extended hiatus after they blew away my average monthly revenue by 75% and hit me with this bullshit in my inbox:

I think this all started when I read about youtube supposedly overpowering people’s CPU’s if they use an adblocker (which by the way they are very adamant jerks about ads makes perfect sense), so I thought sure I’ll turn it off when I stream so I don’t lose stream connection (which kept happening when I had adblocker on). I (like any youtube creator I think does or should do?) will view back through my streams afterwards for quality control and putting together timestamps and just left ads alone cause my computer has been getting fucked with more often (if anyone else has noticed their CPU’s frying themselves lately cause of the supposed youtube being aggro with RAM please let me know) anyways of course I can’t get a message from a real Youtube worker about any of this, but apparently whatever I did was enough for them to cut my revenue down 75% and not running ads on my videos anymore (which yea I get it they are annoying but it’s what gives me a cut of something) leaving me little motivation to keep up like I usually do. in a copy pasted bot message they said the ‘invalid traffic ban’ has a minimum of 7 days but never said the maximum... it’s been a month so far so idk, but that’s quite some punishment. unless I get a surge of patreon supporters over the next couple months to make the time to do all this stuff worthwhile I’m gonna just focus on getting a better job than my retail slave one which I’ve been meaning to do anyways. of course I’d rather be streaming and making vidmixes 24/7 like I was doing during the COVID shutdown but just not in the cards right now. this is all still weird to me though because all my videos that allow me to are still set to monetized, have nothing in my inbox warning me about copyrights, and thought everything I was doing was in good standing, only things I’ve done abnormal is click OFF my adblocker and reported a channel that kept trying to monetize the PS1 sample on all my PS1 plays... now this happened..... and even though I’m not a huge channel relatively speaking it pains me to see channels that just upload VGM with the same trendy fucking tags get the surplus views which guess none of that counts as invalid traffic and I get the same average views and get fucked with suddenly. so yea, basically FUCK YOUTUBE

[scientia-rex]

I got home from work today sneezing my head off with a right eye that won’t stop watering, took a hot shower, climbed into bed, and I haven’t climbed out since. I’m grumpy and I have a headache and if I’m not testing positive for COVID or debilitated by symptoms tomorrow I’ll still need to go to work because that’s twenty patient visits that would need to be rescheduled, usually with someone else, and that’s twenty people I’m letting down. Today I did one of my patented 45-second Pap smears (if it takes longer than that, your doctor needs to get better!) for someone with vaginal atrophy from menopause (it is both very common and very treatable) and she was in disbelief. (This time it was more like 30 seconds.) I saw a suicidally depressed patient who’s clinging to life with both hands and I changed their meds last week and I am not making them wait to see me. I cleaned a wound no one else gave a shit about and I saw a bitter pissy Republican Party bigwig who has terrible anxiety and depression she doesn’t tell anyone about, who’s alienated everyone but who I can still convince to try treatment.

I do my job on hard mode on purpose. I like being important—who doesn’t? I like being legendary, I like that when people move to town and ask for doctor recommendations on Facebook so many people mention me that other patients feel compelled to tell me about it. I got nominated for best doctor in our local region last year. (I didn’t win, out of 5 nominees.) But when I’m sick, when I’m the kind of sick that can be hidden easily, the kind of sick I was always expected to go to school and rotations and residency with, it’s so hard. I hate exposing patients, even to a cold, but the benefits of receiving care are probably enough to outweigh the chance of transmission. I wrestle with myself: if I call in, it starts a ripple effect. Can they get a per diem from their “pool” (of three) to come in? Can they reschedule my patients with me? I don’t have any open spots for five weeks. Can they open same days? None available for three weeks. Can they open blocked spots? That’s going to make my life hell when I come back from being sick. That’s clinic staff calling twenty patients, trying to reach them. That’s twenty patients who feel abandoned. They can know intellectually that doctors get sick too, but they don’t believe it. They take it personally. I have seen this over and over again, until I had to believe it.

It is so EASY for people who don’t do this job to tell me how I’m doing it wrong. “Just stay home!” Oh, okay, you want to tell the person whose chronic opioids I’m supposed to write for that I can’t? You want to put the nurses through getting the on-call to write a bridge prescription? I write more ADHD meds than most of my peers—usually a lot more. You want to tell my colleagues to write meds they’re uncomfortable with? How about tell my suicidal patients (which is a lot of them!) that the provider they know and trust after months or years will be replaced today by a 70-year-old white man who still thinks they should pull themselves up by their bootstraps? Tell my queer patients that they have to wait until I’m better and back to get their hormones and their STI screenings, reschedule a Pap someone was dreading. Every day is a kaleidoscope of opportunities to make a real connection with “difficult” patients. I’m good at it. I may be the best at it at my clinic.

I don’t hate calling in sick just because the clinic manager is a judgy bitch, though that doesn’t help. I hate it because of what it does to my patients. And it’s not simple. Pretending it is does all of us a disservice. I am not a widget. I am not easily replaceable. You can’t plug any of our per diems (all men, 2/3 white, 2/3 old, 1/3 a Bitcoin bro) into my place and call it an equivalent, and my schedule is already so packed that if I call in sick, patients will be guilt-tripping me about it for months. I’m not kidding. That happens every single time.

Christ alive, I wish it was true that doctors never got sick.

[sunflower-lilac42]

✧ 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐁𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐩 || ice bound au ♔

summary: trevor breaks it off with chloe after he realizes his rookie season isn't turning out the way he had planned

warnings: broken glass, fighting, asshole-ish trevor

notes: starting the au off rocky, but don't worry it can only get better from here (maybe) um anyways, as always send me your thoughts, your issues, your life story, i always love hearing from you guys! sorry it's a little short, i didn't want to make a huge fic just for their breakup because i didn't even want it to happen myself but for the plot (and her songs). if you are confused, because i am too, i'm taking the games from spring of 21 and making them so they happen in 2020. covid does not exist and trevor makes his debut in 2020. if you're still confused, don't worry i don't fully understand what i am trying to say either, message me! add yourself to the taglist ➵ taglist!

au masterlist | nhl masterlist | main masterlist

It was the beginning of May, less than a week before Chloe’s birthday, and she noticed the way Trevor had been acting off since at least halfway through April. He texted her less often, and called her less often, which was to be expected with him making the NHL, but Trevor would never let that stop him.

She was sitting in her dorm room, writing down the idea that had sparked in her mind a few minutes ago. Trevor was on the Ducks’ current road trip in the Midwest currently. She had texted a few times but they had either gone unread or left on read. While writing, her phone rang and she leaped to pick it up, “Hi Trev!”

She could hear him sigh from the other side, worrying seeping in, “Are you okay?”

“I need to talk to you Chloe.”

He never called her Chloe, it was usually Chlo or some cringe-worthy nickname, “What’s wrong?”

“We have to stop this.”

“W-what do you mean?”

“I mean that you and I can no longer be together.”

“Why?”

“I need to focus on hockey, Chloe, without having to worry about my best friend figuring out I’m hooking up with his little sister. I need to prove myself.”

His words were like a dagger to her heart, but she chose to ignore it, “Trevor…”

“I can’t, Chloe.”

Each time he said her name, her heart broke more, “Trevor, you’re going to get better. It’s going to get better, I mean Jack-”

“But I’m not Jack Chloe! Don’t you get that? What if it doesn’t get better, what if I don’t get better?”

The two both held their phones to their ears, their eyes glassing over as they sat in silence. It was only a minute later until Trevor spoke again, “I’ve got to go. I’m sorry, Chloe.”

He hung up, leaving Chloe to sit in her dorm room more alone than she was. She looked over at the picture frame on her desk, it was a picture of her, Trevor, and Jack. She was in the middle as both of them placed their arms around her shoulders. She reached over and held it in her grasp, fingers rubbing over the wooden frame. After a moment of holding it, she threw it against the wall, glass shattering onto the ground and finding its way under her feet. 

And she wasn’t even fazed when she placed her feet down fully and it cut through her feet, red staining her socks, “Happy 19th, Chloe.”

𝑻𝑨𝑮𝑳𝑰𝑺𝑻 ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

if your name is crossed out it means i couldn't tag you

@kei943 | @hockeygirl101

[charliemwrites]

ok like as much as i love the feral kept keeper au, at some point, she's going to loose it. there's a finite amount of time Simon can keep her in there interacting with the same 4 people over and over again wo a job before she genuinely looses it. i feel like at some point, Simon knows she has to be gently reintegrated into society bc she just gets depressive episode after depressive episode and nothings helping?

covid times made everyone depressed and if you think about it we lived in slightly better circumstances bc most of us lived with other ppl and could online chat whoever we wanted AND were not limited to 4 strange men for irl contact.

what makes this au unique is the fact that Simon doesn't want to reintegrate her into society, he doesn't want to tame her, he doesn't want them to be a 'normal couple', which is refreshing, but it is absolutely not sustainable for a human to have such limited social interaction and no actual purpose like a job. I think that's what'll get her in the end?

everyone says they'd love it, but literally we'd ALL get bored in two months and start to spend all our time scrolling and doing nothing and getting depressed. yk during summer, after a while you've hung out with all your friends and done all your plans and you start to miss the busy feeling of school? that'd happen to her but times a hundred times worse. imagine having absolutely no goals, no going out, and 4 guys. thats bound to break her eventually. write a little (not necessarily canon) ending to her isolation for me?

Hey, aurora! Per usual, you’re spot on. In all practicality, extensive isolation would have really damaging long term effects on Feral, even interacting with the other 141 members.

So there’s a few ways this can go that I’ve written or discussed. There’s the route where she slowly gets outside privileges, as in going on drives, then running errands while supervised, then traveling together, until finally she’s given freedom to venture out on her own.

There’s a scenario where the rest of the 141 dies except Gaz and she’s left with him. Slowly she reintegrates, but never fully. They stay together probably for the rest of their lives (platonically or romantically)

Lastly, there’s what I consider the “worst case” scenario where she asks Gaz to get her out. He does, but she’s essentially in a witness protection type of life from then on. Reintegrating is much harder this way, but she’d force herself to do it to better blend in and not be found.

Any or all of these are valid! If you need me to send you links, let me know!

[thebookshoparoundthecorner]

Sickfic Recs

I'm down for the count with Covid after avoiding it for three years, and thus have been reading/rereading some sickfics that have brought me comfort. I figured while I was at it, I may as well make a list of a few of my favorites, in case anyone else was in need of the same!

In no particular order:

1. A Tree of Life by aknightofthe7kingdoms

Summary:

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life. Proverbs 13:12 Crowley was certain that he wasn’t ill. He just wasn’t feeling...quite well.

2. La Grippe by LadyWallace

Summary: Aziraphale had watched it take too many lives already, he wasn't going to let it take his friend too. It was lucky then that he just happened to stumble across that deserted barn somewhere in the green fields of France. Sick!Crowley Historical backstory

3. Helped By Angels Unawares by Sodium_Azide

Summary: In the late middle ages, Aziraphale stumbles across a human tragedy that has somehow also affected his demonic adversary, and abruptly understands much more about what he is willing to do for the sake of the Serpent of Eden.

4. Fever Dreams by Lady of Prompts (Aethelflaed)

Summary:

Angels don’t get sick. They can, however, burn through enough of their grace that their corporations begin to malfunction. This happens to Aziraphale far more often than to other angels. Aziraphale gets a fever and Crowley takes care of him!

5. A Matter of Opportunity by PinkPenguinParade

Summary:

The pain danced sharp and angry, lit up ragged nerves. Pulled him on, toward that fuzzy promise of rest. Fifteen feet, maybe? He could do fifteen feet. Could do fifteen feet standing on his head, right?Seven feet.

Four.

He reached out for the door and slapped it once, twice, the wood pulsing against his skinned hands.

6. Such Selfish Prayers by spargelseason

Summary:

Crowley, while still apparently comatose, had somehow managed to wrap himself so thoroughly around Aziraphale on their way up, that any attempt at dropping him onto the mattress without being pulled down as well proved futile.

And hence, quite defeated, Aziraphale found himself lying in a warm tangle of Crowley and blankets. He felt a little stunned.

7. The Words We Say by QixxiQ

Summary: Aziraphale calls Crowley a plague rat one time and it kinda messes him up for roughly 300 years.

8. In Sickness And In Hell by entanglednow

Summary: Crowley picks up something unpleasant while mingling in Hell, and is determined that Aziraphale not see him while he's sick.

9. Temper by TeaCub90

Summary:

‘Angel, I told you not to fuss,’ Crowley croaks, somewhere underneath the blankets – and then he emerges, all tousled hair and black vest, looking both three shades paler than usual and more than a little annoyed at the absolute audacity of the angel for bringing him a hot drink.

‘It’s no bother,’ Aziraphale bats away his irritation, ‘this should be better for you, especially after you threw the Lemsip at the wall. And the hot Ribena.’

10. And In Health by Kalimyre

Summary:

One of the many ways Hell is awful is the demon flu that is always going around the office. Crowley comes down with it, and this time he allows Aziraphale to help.

Indulgent, soft fluffy fic, because Crowley deserves to be taken care of sometimes.

+1 Bonus self rec (cause I'm learning how to get better at doing that)

Our Side by theshoparoundthecorner

Summary:

Aziraphale gets sick. He doesn't know how, and it really shouldn't be possible, but he does and unfortunately there's nothing he can do about it. When he decides he has to cancel his plans to see Crowley, Crowley insists he come over to the bookshop with soup. When he arrives, he looks worse than Aziraphale.

Cue a mysteriously sick Angel and a mysteriously sick Demon, taking care of each other in a London Soho bookshop, drinking tea, eating soup, and having an oddly easy time of it.

Well, at least for the first forty-five minutes.

In which Crowley and Aziraphale see each other at their worst, love each other for it all the more, and learn that being on your own side isn't so bad after all.

Those ten are just a few of my favorites, and I have more that I've been reading and bookmarking, so I might do a second rec soon! Meanwhile, if anyone else has any good omens sickfic recs they want to make (or self recs!!), feel free to do so in the reblogs or comments!

[postoctobrist]

Hi, Alice. I know this isn't really your usual sort of ask, but seeing you talk so lovingly to people just beginning to work out their gender feelings has made me feel sort of melancholy because I feel like I'm on the opposite side. I've been out for almost a decade, I'm coming up on seven years on T and I just kind of feel like I've lost the joy in being trans. I'm dealing with some health stuff, probably related to my hormone levels but as yet undetermined, which has basically eradicated my ability to have any sort of sex life (this is on top of other, much more long-term chronic illness). I might have to start taking estrogen as well which is terrifying the absolute shit out of me even though I know intellectually that taking a very low dose won't have any of the effects I'm afraid of.

I feel like a walking embodiment of the shit TERFs say about how taking hormones will ruin your life and fuck up your genitals. I'm utterly broken down by the relentless transphobia of this shitty fucking island. Sometimes I scare myself into thinking that I want to detransition, even though I know I wouldn't be happier as a woman, but god damn, when I think about that hot little 18 year old lipstick lesbian I was a decade ago it makes me want to cry. I don't know how to feel good about my body anymore. The days of feeling excited about playing with my gender expression feel like they happened a thousand years ago on Mars. The semblance of 'community' I had before COVID sort of disintegrated and I'm still mostly too riven with COVID anxiety to get it back. I'm very sorry for dropping this enormous shedload of feelings on you but I guess I just don't know how to take joy in being trans anymore.

I've been there - sometimes I am there. As a community, we're pretty good at getting people through the early years of transition, but after that you're supposed to just be good, which might be fine except that all the other parts of life keep going. Not only does transition not solve all your problems, but you keep getting new problems and they're all weird - my top left rib pops in and out of place a bit when I sit down now, it's great. We don't have a good set of ways for talking or thinking about aging, including for cis people. And on top of everything else, the world is getting harder and hotter and more bigoted and we survived a fucking pandemic. But: we survived a fucking pandemic. And we survived all the other things. We're tough, tougher than anyone gives us credit for, including us. Under the circumstances, we're doing pretty good. So that's the first thing: what you're feeling is normal.

Second part: is that feeling helpful or realistic? I don't think that it is. You can't know that you'll always be unhappy with your body, or that you'll never rebuild community. I don't believe that people can be ruined. Okay, you can't go back to being 18, and that's painful, but neither can cis people and they get upset about it too. And 18 year olds are really annoying, imagine being one.

All in all what I'm getting at is that stuff happens to us, like it does to everyone. We took an uncommon step to enforce the correct version of ourselves on the stuff, that's all. And you don't always have to be happy or picture-perfect about it, you don't always have to love it. But if that version of you is the right one, I suggest there is something there beyond joy. The joy can be beautiful, but time has given me the chance to understand my transness as a solemn, clear declaration of myself.

And that joy can and most likely will come back. Even if you have to find new things or think in new ways, inshallah we will all get our joyful moments. Despite everything.

be courageous when the mind deceives you be courageous

in the final account only this is important

[savelockwoodandco]

What’s a reasonable timeframe to push for either the renewal of Lockwood & Co, or for another streaming service to pick it up?

Obviously there are a multitude of factors to consider- key among them being the actors (age, commitment to other works ect). After a certain point, things would be forced into the territory of a remake instead of a continuation of the original series.

It’s only been a month (already?!?), and there’s been some great progress is getting the word out there (a massive thanks to all involved for their hard work!), but how long can it continue?

Thanks for the question Anon, and we appreciate the kind words <3. This answer's kinda going to be divided into two parts, namely 1) reasons not to worry about the timeframe for the actors' sakes, and 2) our opinion of the timeframe in constrast with other shows that have been picked up.

There are tons of factors to consider, this is true, but we're luckier than most because of our source material.

In the books we start out with Lockwood and George at ~16 and Lucy at 15 (as per Jonathan Stroud, who only deals with approximate ages), but they certainly don't go through the books at these ages. The first book takes place over a couple months, then there's a year time skip at the start of Book 2, and Book 3 picks up a few months after that (and a four-month time skip between Books 3 and 4). By the time of Book 3 (where S2 will pick up), they're around 2 years older than that, give or take a few months, so that makes Lockwood and George ~18, and Lucy a year younger.

To add to that, according to notes from the show specifically, Lucy, George, and Lockwood are approximately 16, 17, and 18, respectively. If they follow the time skip, which they really kind of have to, at least a bit, that puts them at 18, 19, and 20 come S2.

This works in our favor -- we were already going to have to have a bit of a time skip between S1 and S2, to allow Lockwood to heal and for the Trio to kinda come down from the whole Annabelle/Bickerstaff one-two punch. They may look a slight bit older, but they will have to look a slight bit older.

In order for the events of Book 3 (and 4 and 5, of course) to happen, Lockwood & Co (the agency) has to be more cemented, they have to be getting more cases, they have to be successful, not the incredible underdogs they are at present. Otherwise, the inciting incident of Book 3 that carries us through the first third of book 4 just doesn't happen.

So we have to have a time skip anyway.

It also helps that Jack, Hayley, and Ali (Kipps, Flo, and George) aren't going to look any older even with a gap of a few years, which I don't think will happen. Even Cameron (Lockwood), the youngest, won't change that much at 20; he already looks slightly older than his age, which suits Lockwood, and with the too-small suits and the too-big coat, which they'll resize if needed, he can be kept looking as emaciated and young-yet-world-weary that he is in S1.

As a final note on the cast's ages, L&Co has one of the most accomplished makeup crews I've seen in a long time. TV makeup is usually middling to bad, honestly speaking, but the crew at L&Co does a phenomenal job. It's not too hard to shave a year or two off of a person's face with the right subtle makeup, and they're more than capable of it.

The rest of the concerns around availability can be worked around, honestly. The first shoot only took so long because of Britain's COVID regulations, which won't be as strict this time around. I honestly don't think that availability is overmuch a concern -- and in any case, a fandom can't do anything about that, so it's best not to worry.

As far as a general timeframe goes? As much as we would love to be able to say X months X days is the Final Point so let's push until then, there really is no timeframe -- other than, in reverse of what a lot of of the fandom thinks (this being a lot of people's first ever Campaign to Save a Show, to be frank), that the month mark that we're hitting on Monday is when stuff actually starts.

Ignoring Brooklyn 99 (as ever the outlier), shows as almost a rule don't get picked up in the first month. Even Lucifer, a show that had built multiple seasons' worth of fans and was certainly one of the most active, passionate, nigh-crazy campaigns I've ever seen, took a month.

(As a note of encouragement, a show that both mods enjoyed, Selfie, which was cancelled in 2014 before it could even finish airing its season in the Death Slot, is now apparently in talks 9 years later for a movie to finish up the story, due to a huge swell in recent demand from China, who apparently loves the show and uses it to teach English. That's 9 years later, and we'd given up hope entirely. Good things can and do happen, whether a day or a decade after.)

In this humble mod's mind, the first month is always prep. Getting people organized, getting the word out, hoping for press, making sure that at the very least the cast, crew, and associated people of the show are aware of the fan response. That's been the job we've had in mind for the last almost-month.

Come Monday, we' move on to a slightly different stage. Not that we'll be doing anything drastically different -- continuous, repeated effort is king here -- but we'll be at the time when shows begin to be picked up.

It's what we mean when we say that this is a marathon, not a sprint. We've been stretching, buying water bottles, making punny t-shirts and cardboard signs, and setting out the race's trail. Sure, we hope that we won't have to run too far past the starting line before the whistle blows -- but whether we're picked up in a month or six or twelve or even longer, we're still gonna run it.

The show deserves our effort every bit as much as it deserves our love.

In the once again humble opinion of this mod, I would doubt it will take that long. We've had a phenomenal amount of press, engagement, etc etc etc -- as we say every time we post, we're continually impressed and grateful that we get to play a small part in this amazing effort. I, personally, am humbled by the talent and passion of LockNation every time I see a post on tumblr, or when the Twitter Mod shows me posts on twitter. You're an amazing group, and I'm honored to play my incredibly small role on this stage.

To try to answer your original question, it's the view of this mod that it will be measured in months, rather than weeks, for a pickup of the show, and that the starting gun doesn't really go off until the month mark on June 12th.

So maybe take the weekend, LockNation, and plan to do something this coming week that you haven't -- make a call, make a meme, make a difference. This weekend finishes off our month of prep, after all, and we gotta make sure our sneakers are tied and our sweat-bands are on.

On your mark, get set...

[shipposttt]

The Ship of the Day: Marina

Name: Maya x Carina 

Ship Name: Marina

Original content: Station 19 (2018) - a Greys Anatomy spin off 

Ship info: Station 19 is a Greys Anatomy spin off show about a group of firefighters at fire station 19. Maya Bishop is a firefighter at station 19 who later becomes Captain of station 19. Carina DeLuca is a doctor at Grey Sloan hospital, and they meet when they both go for drinks at Joe’s – a bar near the hospital. 

They begin their relationship, and it is quickly interrupted by the covid 19 pandemic. After being apart for so long they decide to move in together which is a big step in their relationship and leaves Maya, who before this relationship seemingly has commitment issues, quite frenzied. However, Maya accepts this change in their relationship just before another hurdle comes their way. Carina is going to be deported and so she is going back to Italy and going to have to work as a doctor there. However, when Carina is packing to leave Maya suggest the idea of marriage which Carina quickly turns down. They then get into a discussion about how they should’ve known by now that Maya wants to get married whereas Carina doesn’t and that Carina wants children whereas Maya doesn’t. This lead to what seems to be the end of their relationship and Carina leaves for the airport.

Although we see Carina have a change of heart on the way to the airport and she turns around and finds Maya where she proposes to her in front of their friends. They then have a beautiful small wedding which is somewhat ruined by Maya finding out she is getting demoted from captain. Their relationship seems to still remain strong and after discussing it thoroughly they decide to try for a baby. They search for a sperm doner and start the process. However, Maya’s mental health starts to quickly decline and their relationship hits a rough patch when Maya starts pushing herself too hard at work and not coming home and Carina does things such as taking pregnancy tests without Maya present. 

After Maya nearly dies by pushing herself too hard Carina decides to take a break from their relationship to give them both space and give Maya a chance to work on her problems. Maya who is hurt by the prospect of losing Carina starts to put work into getting better by doing therapy and taking a step back from work and even learning how to cook. She then starts to try and win Carina back by trying to ask her on a first date again. They go on the date and have a good time and then try to take things slow again. Although they both admit that they miss being together and start fixing their marriage and try to get back to a strong point. They even discuss the idea of them starting to try for children again.

Type of ship: Canon Queer

Whilst Maya and Carina have had their ups and downs – they took a break that nearly needed their marriage they still ended up back together and stronger. This is a testament to this show and the creators as none of the tropes usually associated with queer couples have been applied here. Both characters are still alive, and they are happily married to each other and trying for children. The same cannot be said for lots of other sapphic ships, canon or otherwise, in media. Again, they have had their downs but none of this is because or a result of them being in a same-sex relationship but rather due to mental health issues. 

The fact that the creators of this show have shown the downs of a relationship as happens with many real-life relationships queer or otherwise is important. This is because it allows fans to have a canon queer relationship with flawed, real, multifaceted characters who make mistakes but ultimately learn from their mistakes both apart and together. Again, this is important because in some instances it could be easier to have the two characters split up but the creators do not let this happen which is major for the portrayal of queer women in media and to fans. 

Admin 🦈

[imagobin]

❄️Winter King Caring for Reader HCs❄️

I got covid yayyyyy so here is how I think Winter King would take care of Reader if they got sick, enjoy! In this, Reader is a bodyguard for WK, whom he has hidden feelings for.

Finding out you're sick:

It takes a bit for Winter King to notice you're sick, either because you try your best to play it off as just a small cold, or because he's being kidnapped by Candy Queen so often he barely has any time to see how you're feeling.

That is until after a particularly tough rescue mission, you quite literally collapse in his arms due to your fever getting too high.

He freaks out, because this has never happened before. He places a hand on your forehead and notices you're burning up, so despite how you're usually the one who carries him back to his ice castle, this time he creates an ice carriage with his powers so you don't further exert yourself.

Yes, he could always do that, he just enjoyed being carried around by you, but even he isn't heartless enough to make you do that when you can barely stand on your own. He may not show it often, but he does care about you.

He notices you're shivering on the ride back, so he places his jacket on you to shield you a bit from the cold. He's fine with just a shirt, cold doesn't bother him at all thanks to the crown's powers.

A realization:

Once you two are back in the castle, he immediately orders his Ice Scouts to make your room extra cozy, and soon you are resting in your bed, in whatever position you feel better in, wrapped in blankets.

Winter King has never seen you so sick, so he's concerned to say the least. He has a tough time establishing serious connections with others due to his past, but seeing you in such a state is really making him realize how important you are for him.

When he notices the way he's feeling, he's quite overwhelmed and goes to his laboratory to try and take his mind off of things, while he leaves the Ice Scouts to take care of you. He just can't fathom the idea of caring so deeply for someone... not again, after what happened with Betty and Marceline.

He starts spiraling... what if you never recover from this? He briefly considers making an ice clone of you if the worst comes, but he quickly tosses that idea to the side.

WK will not let you get worse, he's going to make sure you recover from this fever! This is something very important for him... the proof that he can still save people if he wishes.

The small things he does for you:

Winter King comes back from his lab... with hot cocoa, or any other warm drink he knows you're going to enjoy.

He sits beside you on the bed, dismissing the Ice Scouts, saying he's going to take it from here, and begins to softly run his hand through your hair. His hand is soft and cool, which is a very pleasant feeling since your forehead is burning hot.

The following days, he's the one who always brings you your meals, making sure they're your favorites. He also ensures you're always staying hydrated.

He's never really made such big efforts to make someone happy, but he'd be lying if he said seeing you smile and thank him didn't make his heart flutter.

He also sings to you, 100% convinced listening to his voice will make your illness go away. It doesn't make the process any faster... but it is very pleasant, so you comply.

He's very protective of you, making sure all of your needs are met, keeping that up even when you start feeling better, finding that... it's pretty difficult to stop treating you so well... he might have to promote you from bodyguard to partner if things keep going that way... now wouldn't that be funny?

[alakeeffectgirl]

cruisequarries PART TWO

PART ONE What did we get up to yesterday? 2018? Okay. I will put everything behind a spoiler cut again (there are more pictures/a video today).

Actually, let's rewind just a little, for some Fallout premiere pictures just because.

Paris, July 12th:

London, July 13th:

Seoul, July 16th (according to the designer's website, the hanbok Heather is wearing was designed as a wedding dress, mmhmm)...

I love this picture because they're making those faces at Chris. Here's the bit of Tom making Heather cry in Tokyo:

I highly recommend listening to Tom & Chris commentary track on Fallout, which starts with McQ introducing himself as the writer/director and then Tom introducing himself - as McQ's friend. After the Fallout press tour wraps up, work starts in earnest on Top Gun: Maverick, which Tom and McQ have been discussing - idly, on McQ's part - for years now. "Our relationship is one long conversation about movies," indeed.

While TGM is filming, pre-production is also happening on MI:DR, which McQ has signed on to direct. (These two are usually juggling at least two projects at a time, and really it's probably more like five projects at a time.)

In January of 2019, they're all back in LA so Tom and McQ can pick up some awards.

The McQuarries also go to a premiere and look fantastic (I love McQ's suit):

Tom and McQ go to Ukraine to scout Dead Reckoning locations later in 2019, meet President Zelenskyy, and McQ gets to put his arm around Tom for once instead of their usual other way around.

OH NO I ALMOST FORGOT - at the end of 2019, Tom took the whole McQ clan with him to Las Vegas to see Lady Gaga and ask her to write the TGM song. [cries in 'that's his family']

Production ramps up on DR - and then unfortunately, as we all know, COVID. Most of the cast and crew were in Venice when everything shut down, but Tom hadn't arrived yet.

Production resumes in Rome in October (their production struggles/trying to keep everyone employed/Tom rightfully yelling at people to follow protocols because a lot of jobs depend on them is all well documented), and then moves to Venice. Heather and the dogs are also part of this traveling band.

This isn't six feet apart, dudes...

Production breaks for the holidays, and resumes in Abi Dhabi for the airport/desert sequences, and also one of my favorite pictures of Tom and Heather, just for her expression.

Train sequence filming in Yorkshire in April of 2021, that's Heather in the blue coat:

DR production then breaks for a bit over the summer so Tom can take all his friends to Wimbledon, go to several car things, and make McQ watch football (the soccer version).

DR filming resumes in the fall/winter. Heather goes with to South Africa and they rent out what is basically an adults-only hotel (and save it from having to close!), for part of their stay. I love this picture because Gypsy looks so long-suffering:

OKAY IT'S 2022 NOW, time for the Top Gun: Maverick premiere tour to start - finally! (Do any of these people SLEEP? No. I think it's well-documented that Tom Cruise does not sleep, which is part of what makes him Tom Cruise, but also this means he calls McQ at two in the morning to talk about movies. There's a podcast somewhere where McQ says he thinks Tom might sleep "between the 2:05 email and the 2:40 email", or something along those lines.) (After getting back from South Africa, there was a bunch of test screening stuff for TGM, which is why there are those parking garage pictures. Wouldn't the movie be done, you'd think, since it was supposed to be out in 2020? COVID gave them a reason to tinker with it even more.) The San Diego premiere on the USS MIdway (all the McQs were there, but there aren't any good pictures):

Then Tom went to Mexico, and McQ went home to London for a few days before Tom returned, and they went to the Royal Windsor horse show together.

THEN EVERYONE WENT TO CANNES. Sorry I have just a shitty screencap with a watermark here but alas tumblr only lets you put one video per post. Tom and McQ stopped to get their picture taken en route to the actual photocall and Tom made Heather come back and be in the pictures with them. There is video here.

Cannes, of course, was amazing. I have garbage homemade gifs but they're too big for tumblr (also they're garbage) but all the Cannes red carpet footage is available on YouTube, here and here. (Worth it for Heather, tbh.)

They went straight from Cannes - on Tom's helicopter - back to London for the Royal premiere. Where the McQuarries looked amazing and McQ wore his McQ shoes.

And the after party, because heaven forbid they not all ride in the same car:

And then the McQuarries got a slight break, while Tom went to do more TGM press. But he was back in London by the end of June, and they went on what can only be described as a string of dates. First, they went to the Rolling Stones concert at Hyde Park.

McQ was on Tom's other side, but he's only visible in video (the Daily Mail might be garbage but they do come through with the media).

Then Tom and Heather went to The Eagles show at Hyde Park:

And they all went to see Adele - also at Hyde Park. (The woman in the pink sweater is Tom's CAA agent Maha Dakhil Jackson - I found the picture where you can see Heather over Tom's shoulder.)

Then for Tom's birthday, they went to the F1 British Grand Prix (with some other TGM folks, but they aren't three steps behind Tom like the McQuarries are).

Oh no, we're not done. Tom takes Heather to Wimbledon, where she holds his sunglasses (not visible in this picture).

McQ did not go with, as he was recording a Light the Fuse podcast - which he surprise-dialled in a bunch of DR folks - and his final surprise was Tom. Who was still at Wimbledon with Heather. McQ calls Heather to get Tom, and Heather plays dumb and is like, "oh I don't know where he is, did you try calling him?" and Chris says he already told the podcast guys that they were together. So Tom does his segment from the car he's in with Heather, and his part is only supposed to be like ten minutes but he talks for about forty-five and this includes telling the world they basically all live together. Then they went out to dinner!

And the next day they all went to Wimbledon with Maha and her husband.

I'm stopping here because this is already SO LONG and 2023 is going to be wild just by itself! PART THREE

[paddockbunny]

All Too Well : Chapter Three

Summary : Alessandra Lucciano tells herself she has it all. She is Daniel Ricciardo's girlfriend after all. Isn't she? Well, sometimes she has to work hard to feel like it and no more so than when some girl shows up and makes her question her life as she knows it. So what happens when someone else starts paying her more attention than her boyfriend? Pairing : Daniel Ricciardo x (OC) Alessandra Lucciano Rating : 18+ Word Count : 3,995 Trigger Warnings for this Chapter : sorry sad vibes again, angst filled chapter, rocky relationship, language, slight NSFW, adult themes, implied sex, sexual tension, food discussion, intrusive thoughts & mentions of broken family. Song Inspiration for this Chapter : "You're so much older and wiser, and I wait by the door like I'm just a kid." - Tolerate It

*Author's note: Thank you so much for all the love people have given the last two chapters. You have no idea how much it means to me. I just want to say this is the last chapter featuring the Montana lodge backdrop and the story will move along a little from here. There is a little Italian in this chapter but I am in no way able to speak Italian so if anyone does and something doesn't make sense please let me know so I can amend it. English translation is at the end of the chapter. Again, this is a slow burner so please keep that in mind. Please note that this is set in 2020, covid doesn't exist, Daniel stayed at RBR and no IRL timelines have been stuck too as this is a work of fiction. Hope you like it!!! **Thank you again for all those requesting to be added to the taglist, I'm so happy you like this fic! 💞

August 4th 2020 – Montana

As the whole house lay sleeping, Alessandra had already been up hours. Jet lag had somehow crashed down on the latecomers with feverish alarm. Daniel simply turning over and snuggled even more into his pillow when she whispered a good morning to him at 8:30. She waited till 9 to try again before resigning herself into spending the morning alone at 9:30 when she finally got up. Ali didn’t mind having the mornings to herself usually but when she was supposed to be here with her fun loving, easily excitable, adrenaline junkie of a boyfriend she couldn’t help but feel disappointed. Especially after what happened the night prior.

It had been intended to be romantic. She had made sure his wine – his own fucking brand of wine none the less – was at the right temperature and she had asked the housekeeper to have the hot tub turned on and set just right for them. And when she meant them, she meant the pair of them, her and Daniel. She had gone to change into a skimpy bikini that left very little to the imagination and suggested Daniel change into a pair of swimming trunks. Something, which he totally refused on claims that he was far too tired to go swimming. And Ali almost allowed him to foil her plan right there in the bedroom. In hindsight she wish she had given into him because it certainly wouldn’t have been half as embarrassing as what transpired. With some of the guys already sleeping off their time zone induced sleep, she told Daniel it was fine to stay in his teal coloured sweats as long as he put his legs into the water. She wasn’t even sure what she was requesting triggered anything in his brain. Even when she grabbed the wine and the glasses it didn’t seem to twig. But none the less she she was sure he would appreciate what was going to happen once it finally dawned on him. Ali led Daniel outside and once by the warm hot tub with steam caressing the cool night air of the mountains, he still didn’t seem to have anything firing in his brain she felt utterly disheartened once more. As she held the cup of hot coffee to her chest she wished that she could erase the memory of what happened next from her mind. Her towel fell away – deliberately – to reveal a sinfully small bikini. Daniel’s eyes, naturally, drunk in her body. So at least she knew he was still sexually attracted to her. She asked him to uncork the wine and pour for her and he did exactly as commanded.

“Do you remember that night in New York?” Her voice was practically a whisper as she gently slid against his still fully clothed body. She had always wanted a repeat of that night. The one where he had gotten so hard that she had to help him out underneath the water. The same one that after he had came he had her on the edge of the tub, thighs apart, spread-eagled while he went to town on her. Not stopping till she had practically let all of Manhattan know exactly how good he was with his tongue. “I thought we could repeat it.” She breathed out with a slight sigh. It was then she should have realised his hesitation but instead she ignored it and went to the tub herself. It took minutes – two agonising minutes – for Daniel to pick up the towel on the floor and approach her. “Ali, I’m not using this as an excuse but I really am tired. And besides, anyone could walk out here and I don’t…. lets not give them a show.” And now, as she observed the view with her coffee the next morning, her eyes still stung. She had returned to the bedroom she was sharing with Daniel and faked nonchalance while he got into bed and she went to shower off the chlorinated water. Realistically, she only went to shower so the sound would help hide the sound of her sobbing her heart out. The heart that all these hours later was still bruised. She didn’t even want to get into bed beside him that night. She seriously contemplated sleeping downstairs on a sofa.

But now, as she lifted her cup to her mouth she paused and thought of her grandparents. Her Nonno and Nonna. They were the closest to a picture perfect marriage, as she had ever known. Together having survived many tragedies that could have tore apart any normal family, and yet remained together till her Nonno passed away at the age of 84 a few years ago. Her mother always told her that Nonna claimed her Nonno only stayed with her because no one else could make his favourite Tiramisu like she could. Nonna always reiterated that saying “a way to a mans heart is through his stomach.” And then it dawned on her that she was going about this whole thing the wrong way. She wanted Daniel to see her. All Ali truly wanted was for Daniel to really recognise her and involve her in his life, in all aspects of his life. Ali knew all of the feelings she had toward this Haylee girl were projections of her own frustrations. So, in that moment she decided that regardless of how she felt and how this invader thought she could take over, she would stand her ground. And do it in the best way she knew how, by making dinner.

So when the sleepy men started finally tumbling down from their beds in search of coffee, Red Bull and breakfast she was hard at work compiling a shopping list. Ali had already asked the housekeeper of the lodge to help her source some of the ingredients that were not already available in the fridge, pantry or cabinets. She even shared the list with Michael to make sure he was ok with Daniel eating so many carbs and straying from his usually strict diet plan. He replied by demanding he be fed too and Ali was ecstatic knowing her little plan would pay off. When Daniel eventually arose she didn’t hold last night against him. Nope. She actually played his game in keeping things low key. She didn’t so much as give him his morning kiss that had almost become tradition. Something, which Ali caught him pouting over when he finally sat down but that, was his own fault for wanting to stay on the down low amongst his friends. Nosily he asked what she was scribbling down and she told him he would find out later before changing to the subject of the groups plans for that day. Scotty was filling her in about the bikes that were available at the lodge’s main reception area for free and they all seemed keen on getting out for the afternoon. While she engaged him in excited bike talk – a topic that Daniel had helped school her on months ago – Haylee came down and joined the rest of the team. Sitting down purposefully on the arm of the sofa next to Daniel. Now was the time to stake her claim. And Ali didn’t even need to do it with purpose. She didn’t need to kiss him till he couldn’t breathe in front of her. No, she just let her arm flop on to the back of the sofa and slowly play with the hair at the nape of Daniel’s neck. The move was a classic way of reducing Daniel to a puddle. He turned into a puppy dog having his ears scratched. And as his head rolled back a little in appreciation it allowed Ali to see the girl (who thought she was Ali’s rival) make a twisted face.

“What are we doing today?” She piped up and Scotty announced they were going biking. “Ah cool, space for a little one.” Ali didn’t let the muscling in bother her. It was an obvious move. One that she couldn’t help but eye roll at. She could hang with the boys. She grew up with two older brothers. She could certainly hang with the boys. But she had a much more important task today. Keeping her man well fed and happy. “Well, I’m staying here. I’m going to make you boys the most authentic Italian meal you will ever eat outside of Italy.” There were appreciative groans and Michael informed everyone that the statement was very much true and Ali was a wonderful cook. “You’re really staying here?” Daniel whispered and for a quick second Ali thought maybe he was disappointed she wouldn’t be going with him. A slight wobble ran through her when his big chocolate eyes looked sad that she wasn’t going to be hanging out with him on the first day of his actual summer break. But she brushed it off. “Arancini” Was all Ali needed to say and he smirked broadly at her. She barely made them for him but when she did he could eat them all one right after the other. And Ali kept her thoughts to herself when Haylee scoffed under her breath, commenting she could be a housewife.

While passing the freshly made pasta through the machine quickly enough it didn’t stick and slowly enough it made perfect thick lines, Ali sang along to the song playing on the radio. It was some old fashioned 80’s soft rock thing that she vaguely knew the words too but the ones she didn’t she pulled a Daniel and made them up. She had made shifted a pasta tree out of two coat hangers and hung them on the cabinetry. Daniel loved her fresh pasta. Just like he loved the Arancini, the other three small dishes and the desert. She really was slaving away but she tried not to think of the “housewife” comment from earlier. Housewife? Yeah Beverly fucking Hills Housewife darling. She scoffed but then her phone pinged beside her and it was Daniel sending her a photo. It was of him and the boys all holding their stomachs pretending to be hungry. It was sans females meaning Haylee had obviously taken the picture. And Ali was glad that she didn’t have to have a picture saved in her phone of some other girl that was continually shooting Daniel suggestive eyes.

AL: Cute! When will you hungry Oliver Twists be home for dinner?

He texted back and she received a reply almost immediately.

DR: Soon, maybe an hour. Do you need more time?

AL: Nope! Do you boys want dinner on the table when you get home (I can be a proper 1950’s housewife for you if you want? Suspenders and garter belts et al) or shall I wait till your back?

DR: Cheeky! I’ll text you again when we’re close so maybe start then. Love you xx

Her heart clattered loudly in her chest when she read the last text he sent. He had no idea how much two small little words meant to her, especially after the past few days. Fuck he really knew how to get to her. She wiped her eyes with the kitchen towel she had over her shoulder. Ali’s only wish was that he had said it in person instead of through text. It felt like an age since he had said it to her and she missed the way the words sounded as they poured from his mouth. She was happy with his response because she had prepped everything. The bits that needed to cook were cooking and the things needing to set were setting. Meaning she could go away and freshen herself up. She wanted to not only blow each one of their male minds with the food but also look good enough to eat herself. Guys being jealous of Daniel would stroke his ego and show him how hot his girlfriend must be – another way to really drive home that she was way better than any imitations.

Ali sprinted downstairs with a skip in her step. She was wearing a sundress that was definitely a little too much for dinner at home and certainly too little in terms of how cold she would be but then that gave her the idea that at some point during the night she could ask for Daniel’s sweater. He loved her in little dresses and he loved her more when she wore his clothes. Nothing gave him a more solid hard on than seeing her in one of his oversized t-shirts and she knew it. She reached the kitchen and looked at her watch. It had been slightly longer than an hour so she grabbed her phone. No call or text from Daniel but she didn’t worry. She poured herself a glass of wine and slowly drunk it as she slipped up on to the marble kitchen island. Ali simply willed time to move faster. Patience was not something she was blessed with. And due to this annoying lack of patience she began picking at the Band-Aids that adored both of her thumbs from where she anxiously picked at the skin only 24 hours before. She didn’t want to have to go back upstairs to replace them with fresh Band-Aids from her toiletry bag so she checked her phone again in order to distract herself. Time seemed to move slower and slower the more she wanted it to move faster and faster. She checked on the sauce and made sure other things were seasoned well enough. She added a dash more chilli flakes to one and pepper to another and sat back down again while sipping more of her wine. The irony of the situation didn’t pass her by. She had been put straight back into the same situation as she was the day before. Waiting on Daniel, again.

Nearly an hour later than Daniel had suggested, the door opened and in they all traipsed like a bunch of naughty school kids. “Why are you all wet?” Ali initially laughed but then it dawned on her that dinner would be delayed even further now because they would all want to go have showers. Daniel uncharacteristically came straight over to her and kissed her gently on the lips. The contact was very much appreciated but it only made Ali more confused. “We went for a post ride swim in that creek down there.” Blake answered for the bunch. Truthfully she could have deduced that herself just from observing the smell from them. It wasn’t exactly fresh so she only hoped it wasn’t contaminated, stagnant water that would make any of them ill. “Yeah, it was absolutely freezing!” Haylee exclaimed and came into view beside Scotty. When Ali’s eyes fell on her the smile was wiped away from her face straight away. This girl stood there in Daniel’s hoody. In the hoody that Ali had been just fantasising about having on her own body. But here Haylee stood with it on hers and a subtle smirk painted across her mouth as if she was able to read Ali’s mind. But then, it got worse because this ungracious female said Daniel’s name to get his attention and Ali had to physically hold herself back when she made the next move. With Dan’s full attention on her she began to remove said hoody. Slipping it up her body with a very deliberate slow pace. Ali swallowed to stop the words that were threatening to vomit out of her mouth. Choice words that would send her straight to hell were bubbling in her throat as she watched this shameful display in front of her. Her nails on her middle fingers dug into the skin underneath the Band-Aids so harshly that she could already feel them begin to bleed. Her teeth ground together out of a mixture of pure frustration and from the stinging she felt in her thumbs. Worst of all was that her fucking boyfriend never looked away and in fact has a smirk plastered on his own face. He looked like the cat that got the cream for another girl. And that simply killed her.

As everyone peeled off to shower and get ready for dinner she once again checked the sauce and turned on the oven to heat the main course. But then she didn’t really have anything else to do so she went up to find Dan. Her plan wasn’t to do anything other than chat really. She wanted to hear him talking about his day and at least have a few minutes alone with him. She certainly didn’t expect him to be on her as soon as she walked in the room. But she was not complaining considering he was clad only in a towel fresh out of the shower. Was a dip in a freezing icy lake really responsible for this sudden horniness Daniel was experiencing? “Fuck…” fell from her mouth as his teeth grazed that spot under her ear and his hands instantly grabbed handfuls of her peachy round ass. This was exactly what she wanted all along. A low moan came rumbling up Daniel’s throat when she ran her nails across his back. She felt like he was breathing fire into her soul. Too long had she been deprived of this feeling so now she let her mind forget all about dinner. Sex was her only objective and as he pulled her body flush against him, she could feel it was very much his as well. “How long do we have?” He groaned against her mouth and without a single shred of hesitation, she pushed him back to sit on the bed while she straddled his perfect thighs. “Half an hour. You think you’re up for the challenge, Daddy?” The word was always guaranteed to get Daniel going and right now with an erection like the one pressed against her inner thigh, she knew it was only a matter of time before he would have them flipped over and he was pounding into her. “Please, Dan…” His hand went around her throat and he gently squeezed. The tilt of his head told her he was desperately awaiting her to finish the sentence. “…. Fuck me…” “Oh God, I’m so sorry…” FUCK! Haylee’s voice came from the doorway. Since she walked in on them yesterday, Ali was very aware to close the door so now with her standing there she clearly had opened it without knocking. Where did she get the nerve? The rage built inside her again so quickly that this time she lost her cool and was ready to bite her head off. “I was just wondering what time dinner was?” “NOW!” Exclaimed Ali furiously. “Ok, sorry again.” The door then shut and Ali exhaled hoping all of her irritation would go with it. But when she opened her eyes, Daniel was staring at her. “You didn’t have to talk to her like that.” He was defending her? In different circumstances Ali could remember at least three occasions they had been interrupted like this before. And on at least two of those occasions Daniel almost bit the person’s head clean off. Now he was reprimanding her for doing the same thing? Ali got off of Daniel’s lap and stood trying to keep her composure.

“We haven’t had sex in weeks and every time you so much as touch me, she magically shows up.” “You’re being rude to her because we haven’t had sex?” Daniel’s tone was trivialising everything she felt. He reduced it to nothing. He made it seem so meaningless. He made her feelings so meaningless.

8:44pm

“FUCK!” Blake shouted so loudly it echoed around the whole lodge. “Marry me!” He added and it sounded more like he was begging her. Ali couldn’t help but laugh loudly. Moans and appreciative groans rebounded around the table. The meal was nearly over and they were currently on dessert. Tiramisu. Her Nonna’s Tiramisu. Anyone who ever had one single bite of the light as air traditional dessert always made these noises. Noises that always made Ali think of sex. Daniel moans beside her were exactly what he sounded like when he was fucking her but now, after their earlier argument, it pissed her off. The residual frustration from two hours ago still gripped on to her. She felt it in her bones. The worst part was the only thing that would get rid of it would be if he actually did fuck her into next week. But that was highly unlikely to happen now.

“This is the best Tiramisu I’ve ever had. You’re a lucky man, Daniel.” Michael stated and it was such a welcome compliment but also one that made her feel like she was somehow living a lie. Just as she was about to answer for him and tell the whole table that while she was talented at cooking, Daniel had many more – much more important – talents. She would allow them to be as suggestive with her words as they wanted. The thing was, she never got to say them. “The best Tiramisu is in LA. There’s this place near Mulholland that doesn’t make it too strong, y’know the coffee taste and they put pistachios on the top and oh my god, it’s the best.” It came from the other end of the table and Ali’s eyes rolled. Then her Nonna kicked in. The Sicilian kicked in. “Il Tiramisu Americano meglio del vero Italiano? È fottutamente pazza?” * and suddenly with a slightly louder voice Daniel glared at her and replied; “Alessandra fermati! Non lo intendeva in modo negative” ** The fact he had just done that to her, once again writing off her feelings like that just set her off. “Sì ha fatto. Pensa di essere migliore di me.” *** Ali told Daniel exactly what she thought but the man opposite had already picked up his wine glass and was ready to move the conversation on.

So as quickly as Daniel moved on, so did Ali. She grabbed the finished plated and cutlery and began tidying things up before people has even completely finished. She needed out of that room. Her lungs were crying out for oxygen so desperately she began to feel ill. But then she had felt this horrible unease ever since she got here a few days ago. The more that she tried to pinpoint what that unease actually was the more she realised it had a name and a pair of tits. Flinging the plates into the sink for washing she braces herself for a moment. She didn’t cry. She didn’t let herself cry over men. She had done enough crying over one man that was supposed to be there for her and love her unconditionally for the whole of her life. And that man didn’t deserve her tears no more than Daniel did in this situation.

“Uh...” She spun round rather dramatically to see Michael holding plates. She motioned to the counter top and as he placed them down he asked her if everything was ok because things got heated out there for a moment. “Fine. Everything is just fine.” Ali said it as thought she was trying to convince herself more than she was trying to convince him. She couldn’t share anything about how she was feeling or how fucked this situation was with Michael. He was Daniel’s best friend and would just run and tell him. “If you need to talk.” It was just words people said when they tried to get information from people. Girls used it to garner gossip and guys usually used it to get girls to trust them so they could eventually get into their knickers.

God, please let this fucking weekend soon.  

*American Tiramisu better than real Italian? Is she fucking crazy?  ** Alessandra stop! She didn’t mean it in a negative way.  *** Yes she did. She thinks she’s better than me     

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[tobiasdrake]

Ace Attorney 4-3, Investigation 1. In keeping with Gavin being surprisingly friendly for a prosecutor, I love the way 4-3 spins directly out of our developing relationship with him specifically.

Klavier Gavin is the only prosecutor ever to voluntarily hang out with the protagonist prior to the big conclusion of their arc. Some prosecutors have showed up to hang out in future titles; In fact, Gavin does too. But this is the first time we've actually been able to get to know them before the showdown.

And you can see why, too. Gavin's not only the friendliest prosecutor. He's also the only one who. Like. Has a life outside the courtroom. Other than Edgeworth being a sentai fanboy, I guess.

This one's going to have to be in two parts.

Rockstar prosecutor Klavier Gavin is a rockstar. So we're going to set a chapter of the story at a rock concert. His rock concert. What a great idea.

OH YOU CAN BARELY TELL THAT A MAN WROTE THIS

The least believable thing in the entire Ace Attorney universe is that the Gavinners somehow have a successful rock career. Rock is a counterculture movement, giving voice to the unheard.

It is physically impossible to get any farther from counterculture than literally cops. This is it. The extreme distant end from counterculture. Who the hell would buy cop-themed rock?

The Daily Wire wishes conservative media was as well-received as the Gavinners.

It's especially bizarre when you consider that we're in the Dark Age of the Law, a period of time when the criminal justice system is so widely known to be corrupt and brutal that pop culture came up with a name for it while it was still happening. Everyone knows that the justice system is broken and exists solely to persecute the innocent but we're all gonna buy tickets to watch a bunch of cops play guitars and cheer for how cool prosecutors are.

Nonetheless, this is such an unassuming setup for a murder. Why would there be a murder? We're here to make music. We're here to make cop music. Can we have one nice evening? But no. Gavin and his guest star Lamiroir take the stage and....

It does not go well. In fact,

It goes aggressively not well. Fortunately, the victim lives long enough to tell us that Lamiroir saw him get shot.

Romein here speaking in code to give us a riddle to solve. I usually hate cryptic moments like this when characters use a short window of opportunity to speak in cryptic tongues rather than deliver useful information. But with Romein, it makes sense. The man has been shot and ours is not his first language. He's wracking his brain right now to find correct enough words to use.

In any case, this sets up our crime for chapter 4-3. A classic Whodunit in an enclosed space - complete with a vanishing killer who somehow teleported out of the room despite us breaking in through the only exit moments after the gunshots were heard.

A limited number of people have access to this backstage area and half of them are cops. One of them shot Romein LeTouse. Which means now would be a good time to talk about the cast of characters involved in this case.

We have two sets of characters here. First is the guest singer Lamiroir and her entourage.

The mysterious and lovely Lamiroir, a famous international singer who is probably the real reason all those people are here. Come for the legendary international celebrity but also cheer for the fucking cops so they don't get mad and shoot tear gas into the crowd.

Siren of the Ballad Lamiroir is easily our most interesting character in this case. Not originally from her "home country" of Borginia, her entire persona is a manufactured illusion.

As well as her manager and translator Romein LeTouse whose name makes me sad that our local salad buffet place shut down during COVID. He's one of only two people involved with this case who can interpret for Lamiroir, who speaks only a foreign language. That's a problem, seeing as he's our vic--

Oh, never mind, she can speak Japanese "English" just fine. They were doing that for publicity. Convenient!

And her blind child pianist Machi Tobaye. He and Lamiroir seem like they make for quite a pair. These two, I can believe having a famous musical career. Machi, incidentally, can "also" only speak his native language just like Lamiroir but I'm sure that won't be important.

These two characters form an inseparable performance duo from a foreign land, whose relationship with each other and their late manager will carry much of the intrigue for this case.

The other key set of characters would be our cops.

Of course we have Ema Skye, our embittered forensic scientist whose talents are wasted as a field detective. Of course, she's definitely off the suspect list on account of the fact that she was with us when the gunshots were heard.

There's Prosecutor Gavin who is having the worst day. He probably didn't dunit but then again it wouldn't be the first time, would it?

And Detective Dickhead. His hair truly must be seen to be believed. He is attempting to pull off the Japanese Thug Pompadour in a way that can only be described as, "Hello, Officer."

Just like Ema, Gavin and Daryan both have airtight alibis as well.

It's hard to get a stronger alibi than "Thousands of people saw me onstage while the murder was taking place."

AND THEN THERE'S THIS ASSHOLE

That's it. That's all we get. Glimpses of the Golden Fucko as he bazingas around dodging attention. Okay, dude. Way to not look suspicious, I guess.

That's it. That is our small cast of characters aside. It's not a lot of people to look into. In fact, Mysterious Golden Fucko aside, nobody seems capable of fitting everything we know about this mystery.

Continued in part 2.

[beauty-grace-outer-space]

Advice Requested RE: Social Interaction & Group Obligations:

I rejoined choir after a fair bit of time off. I wasn't in the right headspace for it back in 2018/2019 so I left the season.

I stayed out during the height of COVID stuff (2020-2022) and then when I tried to join in 2023, I had two deaths in the family back to back within 6 months and it just didn't work out.

When I rejoined, I got an email from the conductor (on which they cc'd the head of the organization) basically calling me a flake and saying that they need more of a "commitment" from me. I reminded them that I had two sudden deaths in the family that affected my attendance the prior season, and I don't anticipate a third anytime soon (hopefully).

I got a lecture about attendance and how "any more than three absences will result in a conversation" which honestly rubbed me the wrong way right off the bat. This is an adult, voluntary choir. I pay dues to be there. What does it matter if I miss a few rehearsals? But I digress.

The week before last, the conductor moved someone between me and the woman I usually sit next to, who I feel like is becoming my friend. Here's why it doesn't make sense: I'm 5'8. The woman next to me is 6'0. The woman that got moved between us is 5'4.

As soon as this happened, everyone around us was basically like, "Oooh you know that was on purpose, to separate you guys!!"

And now I just don't want to go anymore. I feel like I'm being treated like an unruly middle schooler, I'm frustrated, I'm embarrassed, I'm upset, and I have just lost all motivation and desire to show up, let alone perform.

I didn't go last week, because I was just too emotionally overwrought from some other stuff going on and I was exhausted. The mere thought of going and having people make comments about how the conductor had to "separate us" threw me into an anxiety attack and I basically spiraled from zero to sixty in 2 seconds flat.

"Everyone there hates me and is making fun of me. She's not going to be my friend if there's no reason to talk to me, and if she's not right next to me there's no reason to talk to me. I don't know what I did, but clearly I did something wrong because now I'm being punished."

Etc. You get the idea.

And as an adult woman, I don't want to feel that way. It's silly and embarrassing and I don't fully know why that was my reaction, but choir night has once again rolled around and I am dreaded it and trying to find excuses to miss this week and the performance we're supposed to have next week.

I feel like at this point my options are drop (again) and prove to her that I *am* a colossal flake (which I am not typically) or go and be miserable and anxious every week for the next 3 months.

Anyone have any advice?

[brightgnosis]

While I'm getting better (slowly), there is kind of some more disappointing / depressing news still- though it's not about me for once around here.

My Husband's really not doing great emotionally. He finally broke down the other day about how depressed and stressed out he's been for months now; he didn't want to say anything because I've been ill and bedbound, and going through my own stuff, and "he didn't want to bother me with his issues too".

He's pretty sure that, since they're finding holes in his Mom's pelvis, and she doesn't seem to really be responding to any of the Cancer treatments since she came out of remission; she just keeps getting worse ... She's probably not going to be around much longer. And I don't really disagree with that? She's a trooper, definitely. But I don't see her lasting through the Multiple Myeloma more than a couple more years, max.

He's worried about after, though, because he and my Father in Law ultimately can't support this house without her disability income, however. Which means they'd have to sell this house and move. But the Farm's too much work to just get it done in any kind of a reasonable time frame- and frankly it's way too far out to be reasonable or feasible if something does happen, anyways. So we'll probably have to sell it and the entire 50 acres with it as well- especially if we even remotely want to be able afford a new house now that everything's over $150,000 here, now (thanks Covid!).

And of course that makes him spiral even more; what happens if we can't sell. What happens if we can't support ourselves. We're going to be homeless. We're going to starve. I'll have to stop taking my meds. I'll be in pain again. He'll have failed me ... The usual spiral kind of stuff. Which turns into Suicidal Ideation, of course, and thoughts of "well if I make it look like an accident, It'll get my life insurance money and It'll be ok"- and I hate that he feels like that so much.

I feel so horrible for him. I've got an appointment made with our GP, though, to see about getting treatment; Talk Therapy and Behavioral Therapies haven't worked for him in the past. So we're going to see about treating his Depression instead- which may, as a byproduct, wind up treating the Anxiety he was initially going in for anyways (which so far has been a bust. And now I wonder if this isn't why; because it's not an issue of Anxiety itself, but rather his Depression).

I just wish I could help him 😭 He does so much, and he still feels like it's not enough; it's not good enough, and he needs to do better for me ... But that man literally carries my entire world.