#which... makes reading self insert fics ironic.

[liliallowed]

don't let my content fool you I'm well versed in the canon dusttale useless trivia :3

[bones-of-a-rabbit]

the babbit masterpost

HELLO welcome to the Babbit's Blog masterpost!!! On this post you'll find some fun facts about yours allegedly (me <33), some ref's for my different 'sona's, and a couple links to my fics and whatnot! Are you ready? No?? Excellent neither am i let's do this

Meet the Babbits!: the self-inserts/personas

the first ref is for my general/most commonly used persona, Babbit! They aren't really an anthro/furry as much as they are a humanoid with the head of a rabbit. I like to think of this one as the 'me' that's in my head- the purest form of my thoughts and feelings, but not the solid real-life me. The second ref is my self-insert persona, Rabbit, the one i picture using most often when i'm reading a fic or imagining a self-insert scenario lol. This one is like the me that people see and meet and speak to in real actual life, if that makes sense. It's the way I come across to people and all of the things I wish I could iron out of my crumpled up real-self <3 The third is a much more specific 'sona, Hazel, who started off as a FNaF:SB animatronic self-insert. She does have a backstory and lore now, which i think makes her more of an OC than a self-insert, but a lot of her is still me and a lot of what she experiences in her backstory is from my life/instills the same feelings that were taken away from things that happened to me, so I think she kinda counts enough to put a ref for her here sdkjfsdhfj (Why the different names?: makes things a little easier, and they hold meaning to me symbolically, I guess!)

Content!: Here's a short list of my various fics that will get updated as I create more! (it was, in reality, not fine.): FNaF Sun/Moon x Reader fanfic, gender neutral, for general audiences, fluff-fest, idiots to lovers "You're the new tech/repairman at the Fazbear Mega Pizzaplex, unfortunately. Your first task? To make the Daycare Attendant into two separate animatronics. It's an amazing opportunity, really, and there is nothing you love more than getting a chance to really work with such tech! The only bad part is that you don't know how to tell anyone that you just might be in over your head. (You are extremely in over your head.)" After Everything Was Fixed (but you were still broken): AU FNaF Sun/Moon x (Animatronic) Reader, gender neutral, read with caution, angst, harm to sentient robots, traumatized main character, hurt/comfort slow burn, romance slow burn "The virus was gone. Everyone was fixed. You had been put back together. It's a time for a new beginning, to do things right this time, to wash away the past and paint a better future. Their memories of the infection had- mercifully- been taken away from them. Yours had not. He doesn't understand why you try to avoid him. Even if you could tell him, you're not sure you would. You want to be his friend, but it's difficult; every time you see him, you remember the hundreds of times he killed you." A fic where you are a repairman-themed STAFFbot, taking place post-virus. In the past, Moon, infected by the virus, took delight in attacking and dismantling the reader during the night. Now, in the present, you find yourself burdened by the memories of the past while everyone around you has no recollection of the events. It gets more complicated as Sun and Moon, both now cleared of the virus, grow curious of you. This fic will follow a series of arcs, presently on arc one. For anyone curious, feel free to send an ask about the arcs in 'After Everything Was Fixed'! The Sun, the Moon, and the Blazing Comet (title subject to change): AU FNaF Sun/Moon/Eclipse x Reader, gender neutral, teen and up audiences, travel/journey, betrayal, hurt/comfort slowburn, reconciling, themes of breaking the mold, found family (TBA) Hold My Broken Hands (title subject to change): AU FNaF Sun/Moon x Reader, gender neutral, mature audiences, dark romance, dark comedy, severe bodily harm, mutilation, murder, obsessive behavior, possessive behavior, lovesick (TBA)

My AU's!: i'm going to make a Babbit-AUs-Masterpost and then put the link here i swear, i just have so many im sorry jdfhsjdfhs (like more than twenty)

Fandoms!: I enjoy, have been in, made or make content for: Pokemon Undertale FNaF Creepypasta (YEAH I KNOW LET ME LIVE OKAY) My Little Pony (I KNOW OKAY LEAVE ME ALONE) Steven Universe Star Trek Warrior Cats i'm sure theres more but i just forgot everything i have ever liked wheeeeeze

Whomst the hell?: HI I'm Rabbit! Or Bones! Or Babbit! Or Avarice/Ava, if you want to go for a more legitimate-sounding name. I'm 24 years old, prefer to use they/them pronouns, and so, so incredibly ace. I've been drawing as long as I've had the ability to hold a pen, writing since I was in grade school, and being a plague to the ones around me since the beginning of time! If you've seen my art, its probably from the absolute mountain of fluffy-wuffy love-dovey (y/n) x Sundrop/Moondrop/Eclipse doodles I've been sharing for several years now sdfjhsdj. If you've heard of my fics, it was probably the one I made just for fun that's now turned into an actual fanfiction that I enjoy writing, the silly-lovey-fluff incarnate (it was, in reality, not fine.) !

Likes n Dislikes!: I'm a sucker for sap, fluff, and lots and lots of love-dovey bullshit! I also like stories about finding oneself and monsters being befriended or loved. I like space, aliens, robots, the odd and strange, injecting humanity into things not human, monsters, creatures, animals, the fae, concepts of spirits and karma and the afterlife, and more! I dislike 'fanservice', most anime tbh LOL it's not personal I just don't enjoy it im srry, FLY BABIES i know they have an actual name but i hate that word too pls just dont i will scream, sexually aggressive/forceful content/characters, being made to feel small, dumb, or trapped,

Other!: I have a pretty high gross-out tolerance! I also have a pretty high 'wow that's messed up huh' tolerance, in that sometimes I will just say stuff that's super grim or dark or messed up and not realize it lmao. I am full of random facts and anecdotes, especially weird or gross ones! sometimes i get on tangents that can go for actual hours so pls forgive that lol

WARNINGS: THIS BLOG MAY FEATURE CONTENT BASED ON/RELATED TO THEMES OF GUILT, CHILDHOOD LOSS, GRIEF, SELF HATRED, DISCONNECTION FROM REALITY/SELF, TRAUMA, AND SEVERE DEPRESSION/ANXIETY. YES I AM GETTING HELP. YES I AM OKAY. THANK YOU FOR YOUR PATIENCE AND UNDERSTANDING.

bonus persona: crybaby

[tachibubu]

Sincerely, from your Friend.

∆ PAIRING ; Aemond Targaryen x Lannister!Reader/OC/Self-Insert

∆ SUMMARY ; In which you, the reader, saw your best friend Aemond marry another woman while being in an unrequited love with him.

∆ WARNINGS ; angst no comfort at all, if you don’t like little dialogues then I do not suggest this fic as it only focuses on the mc’s emotions throughout the whole ordeal with few dialogues. Alys Rivers is not a bastard here in this AU, she is referred to as Alys Strong instead. OOC?

NOTE ;  Inspired by love, rosie and the other woman cover of lana del rey. I Also Made A Playlist! It’s a short read but I hope you can enjoy the music as well. If you would prefer one song as you read this fanfic I suggest High Hopes by Kodaline as the song is where it is heavily and mostly based on! I really suggest listening to the playlist or that song while you read this. 

I am kinda 50/50 with this fic. I ironically like writing it but I just wished I could’ve wrote it better! It was supposed to be based on Charles and Diana’s arguement at the TV series though I scratched it even if I have already wrote a whole draft of it. So I wish you can enjoy this read!

A friendship is supposed to last; that is what you keep telling yourself.

Aemond and you were two of the closest people in the castle. You two struggled through the difficult times together. There were a couple times when you two argued, such as when you didn't agree with how he claimed Vhagar, but these disagreements were quickly resolved because you two couldn't stand to be apart from one another.

Your family will always be a Lannister, and your father, Tyland Lannister, entered the small council when Lord Corlys left to embark on war, and he kept his seat warm by holding the position of Master of Ships. He was permitted to stay at Kingslanding with his family as part of the arrangement, and this was fulfilled. You first encountered Aemond as he observed the Godswood while absorbed in his thoughts. Although the prince indicated he was fine when you asked him if he was, you insisted on making him happy when his expression and actions stated otherwise.

It started out slowly, with him initially being offended by your advances and considering them to be a pity. However, you were quick to disagree and dubbed it "being closer to someone of your age." Though one occurrence altered it all, you noticed him wandering through the corridors and into an unoccupied region. You crept up behind them, curiosity lingering, until you heard a single whimper and noticed his shoulders gradually begin to rise. You hurried over to him without hesitating, and when you did, he finally gave in and embraced you while he sobbed uncontrollably.

He would acknowledge your presence when you appeared in his presence by nodding; as a result, there was a mutual connection; and soon, small talk about subjects that only the two of you could dance about would begin. You will never forget the way his eyes lit up and how his normally firm lips rose their corners in fits of laughter the very day he laughed at your humor. That was the day you discovered you weren't just intrigued by the prince by simply wishing to be his friend; you were also gradually falling in love with him.

You welcomed the concept—the possibility—of having the surname Targaryen. You adored the way it resonated, and you soon began to think that little oddities in his behavior were very endearing. You enjoyed how his eyes would enlarge when he was earnest, his obsession with honing his swordsmanship, and the way his face would light up every time he saw you at the library as you both discussed the contents of the book you had just begun.

You love it all, even his eccentricities and his lowest points. Though things typically come to an end, when Alys Strong came into the picture, yours did as well.

Your pleasant interactions with Aemond eventually drifted to him gushing about the new lady that came into the Keep. Though it was difficult to overlook her frequent appearances as you and Aemond sauntered around the castle, you initially didn't bat an eye at it.

She would engage in the bonding activities you had with the prince. You were initially ok with her interruptions as you observed how Aemond would go from a man who typically pays attention to what you have to say to someone who would start speaking about topics you had never even heard of before when Alys would join.

Although you felt stiff, you were relieved that Aemond and Alys didn't notice it. How could they when they were attracted to one another? You two, along with one of Alys' closest friends, were invited to the castle for a modest gathering—a tea party. The very first time you had seen Aemond flush and stammer aloud was when he sat down on the chair that Alys gave and the way her hands lingered on his shoulder. He had never done that before, not to you or to anybody else.

It was unfair; she was gorgeous, intelligent, and intrigued by peculiar things. All of the activities and interests that Aemond loved. You understood you were holding back their development for one another at that point. You then excused yourself out of self-pity.

"You haven't even sat down." Aemond became suspicious when he noticed that you were suddenly acting differently and said, "How are you fairing?"

You laughed nervously, shaking your head as you placed one hand over it. "Yes," you answered too hastily, though you will soon regret it, "I meant no. Apologies, my mind is foggy, and I'm not feeling good at all."

Alys frowned as she spoke, "Oh dear, take your time and rest."

You added, "Well, I apologize for this hasty departure, and I shall now excuse myself, my ladies, and my prince." You had never regarded them by their titles before, but as you ran out the doors, you were overcome by your feelings. You gulped for air; unaware that you hadn't been breathing for the entire meeting, you were relieved to receive a break. You hurried to your room to get ready for the rest of the day as your eyes started to swell up.

Everything persisted, and your excuses increased significantly in frequency. While you were away, Alys became progressively closer to Aemond, and your connection with him deteriorated. Your heart would soar when Aemond would visit, giving you the impression that he had chosen you, even if the way he spoke when Alys was around was different. He would tell about how he bonded with the lovely girl, and even though it was just a wish, you hoped he had done the same for you.

Then it happened.

You wished you hadn't seen the invitation letter, but that can only be accomplished by going back in time or being blind, which Aemond wouldn't approve of. But there it is, opened and intact, the contents in sight as your head pounded.

Tomorrow night, Aemond and Alys are scheduled to propose marriage, as stated in the letter of invitation.

Your personal maid was waiting for your notice while your dress, which Aemond constantly complimented, was placed on your bed. Your heart began to race as the following day approached so quickly. Even as handmaidens assisted you with your attire and makeup, you divulged yourself in your thoughts to soothe your racing heart. Someone knocked on the door just as you were beginning to forget the incident. The someone being the one you'd hoped to avoid spending the entire evening with.

His pleasant voice, filled with honesty, was expressing, "You look beautiful, Y/N," and you will miss hearing it. You chuckled, then looked back at him and peered into his eyes.

You returned, "You look handsome as well, my prince," and you accompanied him out through the door. "I wish you wouldn't call me that, though," he said, his face seeming rather somber as his eyes continued to watch your every movement.

You lifted an eyebrow, "Call you what?"

"My title," he continued, with pursed lips as he gave you a knowing look. Was your distance really that significant, or had it gotten out of hand? He continued after clearing his throat to get your attention when you didn't respond, "We have been friends for so long; we are comfortable with each other, are we not?"

Your breath hitched, and you felt your eyes fill. "Of course, Aemond." Aemond caught a glimpse of it and hugged you. You blame yourself for being too conceited, and you appreciated his embrace by clutching a little too firmly onto his garment around his back, "I'm going to miss you."

Aemond rested his palm on your cheek and brushed your tears away, ending the hug with a chuckle that seemed to be in bewilderment. His face was so close to yours that if someone had seen it, they may well have thought it was immoral. "There's no need to; nothing will change. We will see each other again just like usual."

"Oh," were you expecting too much? Perhaps you are, and perhaps you should stop. You took a quick breath, refocused, and then steadied yourself. 

"Of course," you both approached the banquet hall as you murmured with a somber smile and your hand accepting his outstretched arm.

There were too many people for you to appreciate, and your normal seat adjacent to the man you love was warm as it had already been claimed by someone else. Your gaze never left the pair, their fits of laughter after a few too many drinks, and the way they held hands when guests attended their proposal feast. Yes, you were resentful, but could you really blame yourself? Would you not be upset if the man you have loved for a very long time chose someone else instead of you?

The feast was lavish, with many tables set across from each other to precisely frame the couple. There were several chandeliers lit up especially for the event. You chuckled as you recalled asking Aemond when you were younger how it was done and his only response being that the stars did it. The guests who crowded the room were happy, which indicated that it was warm, but your side of it remained frigid.

Truth be told, your parents only recently decided to focus on your personal engagement a mere few weeks ago, and Cregan Stark, the young Lord of House Winterfell, offered his hand to you. Your parents have put a stop to all endeavors for all these years as they have witnessed your friendship with the prince, perhaps expecting that you two would soon find comfort in one another. How stupid you were, and now that you're old enough, the letters have become fewer and farther between, but you still hold out hope that you and Aemond will mend fences and become much more. A stupid idea, really.

Even though you were present, most of the speakers and toast-raisers were people you had never met before or who made fun of your relationship with Aemond. Although this gave you time to ponder, a true friend would congratulate your friend on their engagement. Although you weren't very adept at expressing your emotions, with the help of ail, it allowed you to become the kind of good friend you would imagine yourself to be. With your glass rising and a smile on your face, you sprang up and turned to face the engaged pair.

"I also," you cleared your throat while your hand trembled at the amount of attention you had gathered by your sudden outburst. Aemond gave a comforting nod at you, you almost laughed at yourself, even at this moment of time he is always so worried and supportive of you, "want to raise a toast."

You could hear the cheers of people, beckoning you to continue. "I would like to thank the Gods for how they introduced both of this loving couple to one another," you gazed at Alys with a warm heart; although with a tinge of envy, you couldn't help but see her blooming with beauty at the current moment.

You could hear the cheers of people, beckoning you to continue. "I would like to thank the Gods for how they introduced both of this loving couple to one another," you gazed at Alys with a warm heart; although with a tinge of envy, you couldn't help but see her blooming with beauty at the current moment.

"When Alys was first introduced, I knew instantly that Aemond would love her truly," Alys chuckled, placing her head on Aemond's shoulder while she smiled warmly at you.

Your smile fell, though your composure didn't, as you continued, your gaze hardening, "Choosing the one that you want to share your entire life with is a gift, something some of us will never get to experience."

"Your friendship and love have brought many things; some would say they can even see colors when both of you unite. Something I wish I could've seen as well, though the gods play a different game," A couple of people laughed as you joined their fits though yours were grave.

"They demonstrated to us that even if you don't view something as others may, you can still perceive it that way." You shifted your eyes on Aemond as you noticed him getting tense on his seat while you gnawed your lip in fear. If he wasn't conscious of your feelings at the time, perhaps he is now.

"Because I know I love you, no matter where you are, what you were doing, or whoever you loved. I will always be there, loving you as much as I can." The room fell still as low, astonished whispers from a few people emerged.

Aemond's jaw opened and his eyes widened as his hold on Alys loosened. It appeared as though he was about to say something but restrained himself. Alys' attention flickered between you two, from confusion to acknowledgement, but you guessed it just as such because you were too exhausted to really absorb anything before realizing how awkward the environment had become.

"As a friend," you laughed uncomfortably, correcting yourself. Your other hand, which was concealed below the table, would scratch its own skin with its overgrown nails; you know it would bleed, but the embarrassment is far more frightening than a simple blood spill. Alys appeared comforted as you turned back to glance at Aemond, who was left to his own thoughts while his gaze was still focused on you.

You continued, however your nerves were still there, "Though I am not alone now, and I am grateful that she provides you with things I couldn't provide."

"So let us raise our cups once more to my favorite friends." You raised your cup higher and placed a beaming smile on your face, saying, "Congratulations on your betrothal; may your marriage flourish and never end."

"Sincerly, from your friend."

While the audience applauded in unison and some even screamed accolades at you after your speech, it didn't help that after you sat in your seat, you felt yourself continue to merge with it as your eyes began to wet a little. Though it didn't stop there, Alys stood up, raising her own cup with a beautiful smile and saying, "Thank you, my dear friend. I also want to raise a toast to you about your engagement."

No, not like this. Your eyes became wide, nearly making you desire for her to cease, though she continued. Her smile widened, though it held no sincerity. "To Cregan Stark."

Aemond and you locked gaze once again. "I wish both of you a healthy engagement as well," the female added before coyly kissing her fiance's cheek. The expression he exhibited was a complex one, but you were too busy being humiliated to understand the message behind it.

Following the ceremony, there was a dance as people chatted among themselves. You could have thought it was an opportunity to introduce yourself, but instead you stood next to a pillar and listened to a woman talk to you about things you couldn't even fixate on. Only Aemond's potential current feelings toward you—possibly disgust—can impair your judgment. Even though your little encounter was swiftly over, you noticed Aemond peeking your way amongst the joyful crowd, seemingly hoping to strike up a conversation. Before turning to face you, he had excused himself from a Lord during his short conversation with the elder.

Your lips quivered as you reflected, 'No, not this way.'

You again excused yourself before Aemond could get to you. Avoiding a potential conversation between you two is the one thing you have ever been excellent at. You abandoned your glass and walked out of the overcrowded room as the lady nodded in understanding but seemed baffled. Missing the way Aemond had called out for your attention but was dismissed by your abrupt choice of action.

Your knees gave out as you attempted to stand in front of the tree, the exact godswood where you and Aemond first met, and tears began to flow from your eyes. You begged for prayers, pleading with your wounded heart to cease whatever it was doing and demanding that it carry you far from where you stood. You have suffered for too long; you have finally realized that, and you have acknowledged that the very God you were praying to is harsh and cruel. As you cradled yourself in your sobs, you yanked at the soil with rage, your forehead meeting the tip of it, as wails could be heard throughout the entire space, not caring if someone would eavesdrop.

You thought of vows that could have been ensued if you were only tough enough to conjure and confess your feelings to him, as well as the numerous ‘what ifs’ that might have followed.

Of all the people your heart has chosen to love, it chose a man who loves another. And most of all, you wept, wishing he had chosen you instead of her.

TAGS: @maymay456 ; @kalmado ; @ml0103 ; @justsumtuffstuff ; @zverea ; @parizparis

[waterparksdrama]

ok track by track review of Intellectual Property. GO!

as you wish anon. be warned this is literally like one of maybe 4 times i've listened to this album in full again

st*rfucker - a bit too saccharine on first listen but it has better replay value as time goes on. the beginning of the shoehorned jesus lyrics and the continuation of limo imagery to represent fame which is actually fitting admittedly bc just like a limo that is supposed to represent glamour and celebrity living, they are just as widespread and accessible as him and aren't really that glamorous at all. also this is me saying again wow he complains a lot about fame for someone who isn't really that famous. i still hate the cutoff at the end bc. cmon man. 7/10

real super dark - ok i did like the gilbert gottfried inspired melody i think that's fun actually. the song lyrics? uhhhhhh. just more complaining. if you have listened to any of the albums since fandom you are not missing much there other than the otto serial killer jokes he has inserted here? which is a choice i guess. instrumental is great tho. i feel incredibly stupid listening to a lot of the other parts of the song tho. 7/10

funeral grey - god i can't bear listening to this one on my own i'm sorry. live it's fine, but the studio recording i would rather kill myself than listen to again. IT'S SO ANNOYING. the terrible overenunciated vocals. awsten's attempt at humor by writing these wattpad fic lyrics that make me cringe to my core because i know there's a part of him being genuine. the one direction ripoff hook because he managed to get one of 1d's actual songwriters to help write the track. the only saving grace is the ending but at that point it's too late for any redemption. 2/10

brainwashed - ironically this was written with the 1d guy again and. i'm actually fine with this one LOL. it's simple and lowkey so it's considerably less annoying than funeral grey. considering awsten said the lyrics on this album were hypersexual, but it's 2023 so this is fairly tame, it just makes me wonder how much he has repressed in his psyche. 6/10

2 best friends - ok now we're back to simple annoying. if you tune out the lyrics enough, it sounds like disney channel filler music. but it's actually about ~~sExxxx~~ hahahahaha everything about this album so far is like reading fanfics clearly written by middle schoolers. awsten's sad about his situationship so he goes out with his 2 best friends to forget but it doesn't work :( but he could just fuck his friends bc it wouldn't hurt to try at this point. hey what if this was what the song was actually about that because in travis' insane songfic he made jawn and awsten hook up during this chapter #neverforget #riptravisficeventhoughmebitchingontumblrmadehimkillit 4/10

end of the water (feel) - hearing awsten try to hit those high notes reminded me of people saying brendon straining on his high notes on the last panic tour was like hearing a dog that needed to be shot out back for its own good. this is very obviously a charlie puth ripoff to the t because not only does he hit high notes that no man should ever reach, but i'm pretty sure the verse instrumentals rip off "light switch" by charlie. anyways more of "ughhhhh i'm not getting a text backkkkkk" that makes me want to throw awsten's phone into the pacific. i still don't know why kurtis conner is here and how this is supposed to relate to any of this at all. also actually now that i'm crossing checking the genius pages for these, the descriptions for these songs make them sound much better than they actually are lol. 3/10

self-sabotage - this one is mid on it's own but funny because i remember the amount of twitter discourse this song has spawned. "awsten's being toxic and misogynistic" did we not listen to some of the songs off fandom "awsten has bpd" what if he just sucks sometimes. the memories of this are more memorable than the song itself. 5/10

ritual - remember when i found out the soundbyte at the beginning was from an aids psa. good times. fine song other than the shoehorned soundbyte. the entire song is just a repetition of the verses and chorus like a ~~ritual~~ spooky! i like the flair vincente void adds with his screams i feel like this feature makes more sense because it's a song about protecting yourself from the doctrines of religion that harmed you when you were growing up and apparently vincente has known awsten since he was 13???? only thing i hate is the corpse ripoff ending so much so that i have a personal version where i edited that out. 8/10

fuck about it - BORINGGGGGG OH MY GODD. if you've heard one blackbear feature, congrats you've heard them all because they all sound the same and blackbear adds no energy whatsoever. he made a bayside instrumental sound boring you really can't underestimate him. anyways back to the song itself; the situationship has dissolved into pure sex and disinterest and annoyance outside of that and with the way awsten sounds like he plans having hate sex, i don't think he's ever had hate sex before. there's the ending synth i think is fun and that's the only reason this gets a point at all. 1/10

closer - it's a sweet song but um. haven't we heard this in a way before? *cough cough 21 questions* i think this is the closest (lol) parx comes to at a return to pre-fandom form, but when i listen to the chords too much i'm just like "did he lowkey rip off that one smashing pumpkins song". anyways it's just about needing to be closer to someone or ending the relationship completely. simple but effective but not nearly as effective as 21 questions for me sorry. 7/10

a night out on earth - ok i had physical tickets to the last tour bc i won them on idobi so i was like "THIS SONG BETTER BE AT LEAST DECENT BC I STILL HANG UP THE TICKET WITH THIS NAME" and it was at the least. it's like. a good waterparks song, but i feel like i've heard it already? my mind goes back to see you in the future but for these i can't tell who's ripping off who more lol. yeah i feel like other than some interesting production here and there it's a rehash of shit we already heard before. shoehorned religious lyric. fake ass band guys. "i turn my agony into songs and people only like when i'm hurt". "i've been dead since 2016" (part two). "i'm evil now. idgaf. wat ever."

and then i think the part that makes me go awwww but also confuses me is the im a natural blue radio interview snippet? like why does this all tie in together now. geoff's not even here bro how is this the only release where otto's the only one namedropped when awsten hasn't even named dropped him until last album. 80% the album is about some random relationship how is this supposed to tie into all of these.

idk i feel like i've just had this on my mind when when of my mutuals made their own analysis on awsten's mindsets towards life and said how he uses fear as motivation but his perfectionism keeps him from using failure as an editor and how this song was the peak example of this; the rehash of the same ideas over and over because despite his stubbornness, despite "ultimately -not- giving in to the perception that you’re worth ‘Demonizing'", he never confronts the problem for real, just compartmentalizes the problem away and doesn't truly overcome the root of his problems. that's what i feel like manifests in this album for me to be put off by it at its core. nothing ever changes, he just finds a new situation to complain at. maybe that's also why his fans never change even as new ones come though. maybe that's why we also stay stagnant in this with him.

again i get it, he's a public figure; if he did dive too deep into this and didn't choose to generalize the lyrics for his own sake, he would probably end up incriminating himself way too much and have a hard time performing some of these songs. but i can't help but wonder. if he's truly getting over a mental obstacle like that, or keeps himself so set on the future that he ignores the problems he never solved. like he always does. like he always seems to be doomed to. anyways, 7/10 song.

all in all, it's an album that tries to reach a concept of coming to terms with your sexuality and religious trauma all entwined in fame but in reality it's mostly just about a sucky situationship and awsten complaining again while putting in random religious references sometimes and the beginning and ending are about fame. my hot takes are: tennis imagery = gay sex, there's not enough of a distinction between "soulsucker" and awsten to make "album lore" when the overarching concept of parx's discography is "awsten's life sucks", and darth vader is luke's father. - iz

[weird-obsessed-girl]

Modern Character in Thedas!! Fic Rec

I actually love that there’s a part of the Dragon Age Fandom where basically self-inserts have such good fics. I’ll admit that a lot of what I read in this tag is self-indulgent (but that’s really what fanfiction is for) and I thought I might catalog some of my fav fics so far.

I think also what’s great about this tag is that it actually exists! I try to occasionally find similar concepts in other fandoms but this kind of tag doesn’t seem to translate into many other fandoms, or at least the fics that do exist aren’t exactly to my taste. So hopefully this is helpful to everyone like me!

Mostly only Inquisition. IF ANYONE HAS ANY RECS PLEASE SHARE

Also can more authors pls write different ships other than Cullen and Solas?

I’m more partial to completed fics but unfortunately many of the fics in this tag are WIPs. I’ll be posting more lists like this in the future so be on the lookout.

With Horns - The_Ravenous

Not rated ı 97/? ı 362,357 words ı updated 2021

Modern Boy in Thedas who gets turned into a Vashoth, he basically replaces Adaar. Male Inquisitor/Cassandra, yay a ship that isn’t common within this tag!!

I’ve only read the first few chapters but the main character seems funny and I’m partial to the MC becoming a mage and learning the ins and outs of magic.

Identity - AMCanderly

T ı 6/6 ı 26,172

This is part of a series where a woman from earth get transported into Thedas in DA 2 but she gets made tranquil, this fic specifically is her struggle in having the mark which causes her to be cured and her struggle with regaining consciousness/autonomy.

Sugar and Spice - Cracking Lamb

E ı 15/15 ı 25,894

This is a fic that spans across all 3 games so therefore is not a very detailed fic however I love the stable relationship between Bull and the MGiT.

What a Wicked Game - Cracking Lamb

E ı 148/? ı 400,570

CrackingLamb yet again! I admit I have not even read this one half way through but from what I have read I really enjoy Imogen/Solas even if it’s slightly toxic, also good smut…

No Longer A Game - Here_To_Be

E ı 63/63 ı 347,357

I haven’t read this one but it seems to be promising, you might be noticing that I prefer to read about an MCiT that knows the events of the game so any summary mentioning that the character loves Inquisition is immediately put on my TBR.

MARKED - ThroughtheMirrorDarkly

M ı 10/10 ı 109,948

I read this a while ago so I don’t remember much but I remembered the name out of all the hundreds of fics I read in a year! The MC has spent a few years in Thedas but wasn’t involved in the story until Inquisition. Solas/OFC

Running On Empty - PickleDillo

T ı 27/27 ı 163,762

This is the first in a completed series, MC/Iron Bull so obviously it has to be included, I can’t wait until I finish this series. This includes an MC inquisitor who isn’t immediately skilled in combat or over powered.

Coalesce - Beckily

E ı 36/36 ı 83,437

This does have a r8pe warning so I’m not sure if this is explicitly in the story, but it has such an interesting concept of a Modern Girl who gets transported into Male Adaar’s body and they have to figure out how to live together.

Virtually Faded - AntlersandFangs, Celtic_Lass

M ı 101/101 ı 519,973

This is probably a fic that i am not going to read anytime soon as I’m intimidated by the word count. (Don’t make fun of me I’m not patient enough to read really long fics, i need to CONSUME as many fics as quickly as possible) This fic is centred around a pair of friends who get transported to Thedas so this is slightly different from the other fics in this list.

Ad Infinitum - Stormontheocean

E ı 78/78 ı 252,544

MC discovers that Thedas’ Common language is definitely not English so she pretends to be deaf and mute, slightly Mary-Sue but I’m not opposed to it in doses. MC/Cullen

Commiseration - cleighc

M ı 1/1 ı 12,867

A small one but with a focus on relationship between Cole and MC, def not a happy one but interesting nonetheless.

Swedish Firesteel - Escapist_Velocity

T ı 100/100 ı 142,503

I haven’t read this one but it could be interesting. MC/Cullen

{1. Defiance} Everything’s Just Fine - EmpressTod

T ı 73/73 ı 181,562

MC/SERA!!!!!!! Sera is never bloody apart of the main pairing so this is exciting for me.

honeyeater - foetend

E ı 21/21 ı 58,529

Reasonably short one that I haven’t read all the way through so hopefully this is worth it. The concept of Flemeth being involved and tasking MC to get close to Solas is heaps unique so it has to be mentioned. I feel like people really don’t utilise the Elvhen Gods/lore enough or perhaps tend to lean towards paragraphs of lore dumping.

Suddenly, Qunari - Jiwa

E ı 20/40 ı 168,203

Once again MBiT gets transported into Adaar’s body and becomes the Herald! Eventual polyamory with Bull and Dorian, I like how cute and funny MC is.

Ithelan - DyeingRoses

M ı 35/? ı 80,925

Inquisitor/OC which is not common, however I’m not sure how frequently this fic will be updated, this is def on top of my TBR list. MC becomes a tatted elf.

Sugar Honey Iced tea - AntlersandFangs, Beckily, Celtic_Lass

M ı 48/48 ı 412,762

Multiple modern characters dropped into Thedas, haven’t read this one but it seems interesting most especially because of the pairings. Varric/ OFC, Krem/ OFC, Solas/ OC, Inquisitor/ OC.

The Guardian - yayenchan

M ı 13/? ı 56,602

Female Trevelyan/ OMC, Mary Sue elements here but the first chapter seemed promising.

[bubblegum-blackwood]

🤲what do YOU get out of writing?

Ah good question. I feel like that's a complicated one that's not so straightforward to answer.

TL;DR - idk I like it :] and I like people

I've been writing fiction since I was nine years old. My teacher had us do some creative writing in class, and I fell head over fucking heels for the concept! It's crazy to see how much I've grown since then 😂 but I kid you not, I've known I wanted to write for a living since I was nine years old. I did it once and was like yeah . . . I like this. Funnily enough, I started out writing fanfiction, although at the time I hadn't heard of that word or that concept. My sibling and I had a game we called "Kid Wars" - essentially, we RPed being Star Wars OCs. My character was a female clone of Jango Fett (how did I come up with that as a small child and then The Bad Batch happened????????? will never get over that) who secretly joined the Jedi Order and fell in love with Obi-Wan 😂😂😂 ah, children. This origin story is never not funny to me. Anyway, over the years since then, it's slowly evolved into something nearly indistinguishable from Star Wars (I've mostly just kept something that vaguely looks like the Force and some OC names and arcs, but the worldbuilding is entirely original, and I had so much fun with it!)

But I digress.

It's ironic to me because even though my writing days largely started with terrible self-insert fanfiction I since then only wrote original works and even railed almost as vehemently against fanfiction as Anne Rice herself! 😂 But I spent some time on Tumblr and I caved and read Burden of my Days by @hekateinhell and have never been the same since. And now I have 36 fics and counting!

What originally drew me to writing as a kid is just the whole idea of making shit up. I've been making up silly lil stories in my head to keep my insomniac ass busy at night since I was in kindergarten, and when I realised I could write them down? When I realised I could get paid money for that shit??? Hell yeah! I can make a career out of doing something I genuinely love doing, and I'm so grateful that it's even an option for me because I have no clue what I would have told people I wanted to be when I grew up otherwise. As I've gotten older, I've understood more about what exactly I enjoy about writing (which allows me to take inspiration from the books and shows I like without copy-pasting every minute detail that I don't actually need) - it's people. I like people, I like knowing what makes them tick, I like watching them fuck up and I like watching them interact with others. It's part of what draws me to psychology and sociology, too. I just genuinely enjoy stories. I could eat a well-done character arc for breakfast, honestly. And that's what gets me about the writing. My books don't need big grand plots, the conflicts largely are not centered around big bads with large armies, it's all about people and the relationships they have with others within the narrative. (Don't get me wrong, though, I have fantastical elements - vampires and ghosts, especially, are quite abundant in my stories).

Plus, there's something about the actual process of writing that just gets me in a good mood. Sometimes the executive dysfunction or general life fatigue makes it hard for me to get myself to pick up the pencil, but when I feel motivated, DAMN, the juices be flowing! Sometimes I get in the zone and I just know what happens next and the words just come to me and it feels good, honestly good. I can agonize over it for hours sometimes, but crafting artful sentences to paint a picture with words is such a powerful feeling. I just can't imagine how my life would have turned out had I not discovered how fun it is to write.

And with fanfiction? To me, it's all about connection. To look deeper at the text, to identify what you like about events or characters or pairings and make it your own, to really know the book you love so much. But not only that, then also you get to connect with other fans! You get to get excited together, be proud together, maybe even make friends through it! You get to talk to people!!! And I think the value of that can never be understated enough.

Anyway. I've rambled plently now 😂 thanks for the ask!

[based-bobcat]

why is so much stuff in the Jessica Cruz tag rwby?

There is a longish answer to your question. The tl;dr is that the RWBY fandom generates content like Stephen King on coke and Jessica Cruz was a main character in a DC/RWBY crossover.

I can and will ramble in-depth about it though.

I'll preface this by saying that I have and will never watch even a second of RWBY. Aside from the fact that I think it looks plain bad, the most annoying person I know kept trying to force it into every conversation so I wont watch it out of principle. So what I know is from lurking too much on the internet.

The sad fact is that Jessica hasn't appeared much in comics lately. After Green Lanterns and JLO ended she kind of disappeared from the radar and, as most Lanterns not named Hal or John do, only really showed up for crowdshots and the occasional cameo. They teased a story in which she would go undercover in the Sinestro Corps, but they dropped that story completely. She has a bit part in the current Green Lantern run (Going undercover ironically) and starred in a GL back-up explaining how, where and why she is undercover. Sure, she was the main character in a DCAU movie, but it wasn't a controversial one so nobody cares about it. Also that was like 5 years ago what the fuck? And she's a main character in SHG, but personality wise she isn't even close to canon!Jess so I'm not really counting that.

Now for RWBY. They had a cross-over deal with DC comics. (Not rare at all since DC like to do that stuff. Godzilla and Star Trek to name two) If I remember it correctly it was like 2 movies and a few comic miniseries. I havent read/watched them because... Well it's RWBY. I'd rather read literally anything else.

Now Jessica was a main character in one of the RWBY/Justice League crossover movies. The reason I personally believe her to be the chosen Green Lantern for that movie is the same reason I like her. A character whose powers stem from her willpower who also suffers from anxiety is an inherently interesting concept. Said concept has market appeal because it's an interesting take on the superhero ideal. (The other reason that they picked her is because you can turn her into a cute animegirl because RWBY is like anime but worse.) Her design was very much animified and she looks like a 12 year old but I digress.

Here's the rub; RWBY's fandom is like insanely active. Art, fanfic you name it. It's made up by a few groups as most fandoms are, but we're going to focus on one particular group; Shippers.

They are the ones making like 90% the RWBY content. They create a fuckload of fanfiction and art. They go to war with each other, etc. Now what is important to note is that, according to my browsing habits, 50% of those shippers tend to ship a guy named Jaune Arc with every female that has existed ever. I'm talking harem/smut/ship/AU fics up the wazoo. Anyone he has ever shared a scene with (or hasn't lol) has ended up sleeping with him in a position or two according to Ao3.

If I got it right, Jaune and Jessica had a budding friendship in that movie. But since Jaune 'self-insert' Arc gets shipped with about anyone who has a cup-size, this has snowballed into there being a myriad of Jaune x Jessica content.

So as a result of DC not utilizing Jessica combined with the RWBY fandom being an unstoppable content machine her tags are now cluttered with RWBY.

[adickaboutspoons]

List five of your least-popular fics, as well as when/why you wrote them. Tag five people to play. Shamelessly stolen from someone foolish enough to say they were tagging "anyone who wants to play." I'm going to go ahead and interpret "least-popular" as "has received fewest hits"? I mean, I have a (prolly unhealthy) spreadsheet with data like the ratio of kudos:hits, which is PROLLY the most accurate way of determining what was well-liked by the people who read it, but that's also possibly just speculation (except Like I Want to be Awake, my beloved. It's got the lowest ratio of them all, and even the people who were nice enough to comment have mentioned that the ending is a bit of a downer because it's canon-compliant. So I can easily imagine that readers getting to the end of 16K and being mad about the "downer ending" that I didn't warn for). Anyway. Unbelievable: written in August 2023 in response to @ofmd-dailyquest prompt: Make Up Unbelievable Stories about The Most Fearsome Pirate. I'm not surprised this one has so few hits. It's T-rated (generously, could easily be G), and Jeffery Fettering is the POV character. Who's that? Exactly (The answer is the guy who approached him in the tavern in Bridgetown). Just because I like to imagine the string of repressed white dudes inspired to piracy that Stede leaves in his wake doesn't mean it's gonna be everyone's cuppa. It's about Jeffery and his tavern buddies making up nasty stories about Blackbeard's exploits to entertain themselves and Jeffery realizing that they're all full of shit and he's bored out of his skull and hitting much closer to the truth than he knows.

Hook Head Man Tale: written in April 2023 in response to another @ofmd-dailyquests prompt: Learn the Hook Head Man Tale (Bonus: Discover how he Eats and how he Kisses). Another one I'm not surprised about. It's G-rated, and it's kind of bad on purpose (from a technical writing stand-point; it's written in the style of Young Stede's first self-insert fan fiction, so it's pretty self-indulgent and overwrought). It's the story of Young Stede meeting a creature with a hook for a head because he's under a curse. And breaking that curse to reveal it was really a fairy with long black hair and big brown eyes all along... When a Good Plan Comes Together: written in September 2023. Ed and Stede plan a fuckery together for the first time after the reunion, and get caught up in the giddy euphoria of it and wind up making love on the paper-covered table. I've talked smack about it before. It's fine, and there's actually some pretty excellent metaphors and lovely turns of phrase in there, but mostly I'm cross with myself for lazily glossing over both the actual plan of the fuckery and the actual sex. Stede Sonnets: started in December 2023, but I add new ones every now and again when the fancy takes me. Exactly what it says on the tin - sonnets either about or from the perspective of Stede. Poetry isn't everyone's jam, so yeah - another one that I'm not particularly surprised it's not popular. Under Par: written in June 2023. Stede is golfing with the Badmintons and hating life. Ed is a flirty cart-girl (delivering beverages and snacks to golfers on the links) to the rescue! Remember when there was that 2-second clip of Taika in his Blackbeard get-up riding around in a golf cart in the bts footage from a Rita Ora music video? And we were so desperately starved for any news at all about the second season that we all lost our minds? So this is a little modern AU based on that clip and comments it inspired. It was v. much an "of the moment" fic, and now that we've all moved on from the moment, I'm not surprised there's not any interest in reading this one anymore. Ironically, this has the highest kudos:hits ratio of all my fics, so even though it's not been read by many, I guess those who did read it generally liked it? Tagging @bizarrelittlemew, @chocolatepot, @emi--rose, @epersonae, & @forpiratereasons

And, of course, anyone who wants to play 😉

[watermelinoe]

1/2 Sorry for dumping this here, I’m currently crypto. As a gender crit fandom goer, I love fanfic but ao3’s genderland is depressing. I used to morbidly dip into reading ABO when I was younger, and it took a while for me to see that it’s just reinventing heterosexuality and sexism. What bothers me most is how it’s a sign that women DO want to talk about reproductive rights and issues surrounding pregnancy and raising children, but they’re so steeped in shame that they can’t even do that AS women. Instead, they have to invent an entire universe where men can be pregnant in order to justify it, even though genderbending the male protagonist to be female would be much simpler. They do not see female characters as fully human, or maybe it’s just too painful to confront the reality of female oppression without cloaking it in something else. The crazy thing is, if you asked any one of these women why male omegas are oppressed, they’d be able to tell you it’s because of the omega’s ability to give birth. And yet they can’t make the connection that real women are oppressed for the same reason. It’s so crazy that all their trans logic completely vanishes in ABO fic. Omegas aren’t told they’re bigots for being afraid of alphas and wanting to avoid them and have omega-only spaces, because omegas get raped and harassed by alphas all the time, and it’s recognized as a pattern. I’ve read fics where omegas take scent-blockers in order to pass as a beta or an alpha, and they NEVER do it because they internally identify as beta or alpha, they do it because they know that they’d be mistreated and stereotyped if anyone knew their true identity as an omega. Alphas hold all the wealth and power in society and are known to turn into violent, mindless beasts due to their sexual urges. You never see ABO fic in which alphas try to transition into omegas and claim oppression. I wonder why? Is it because their biology is immutable and such a thing would be fucked up and wrong? Change alpha to man and omega to woman and most ABO becomes basic TERF rhetoric. I wonder sometimes if mpreg fic is the only way to get through to these people. The ironic part is how most of the women who write mpreg and ABO are gendies. The same women who mock all the straight girls writing hetfic on ffnet, while touting ao3 as some kind of “queer haven”. But almost never do you see fic about alpha/alpha or omega/omega love stories. Overwhelmingly, it’s all alpha/omega with the omega as the self-insert. Hetfic with extra steps. It’s insane to witness. The unashamed straight girls who happily write pure hetfic or genderbend hetfic are braver than any gendie could hope to be, and the scorn they receive from TIFs is pure projection. Homosexuality isn’t some kind of curio. Gays can be both interesting and boring just like straights can be both interesting and boring. I think the main problem is that TIFs are ashamed of being straight women, and they use fic to fulfill their attraction to men while also escaping from how disappointing real men are. Don’t get me wrong, I think turning to writing as an escape from disappointment is a fairly healthy coping mechanism. But problems start when their writing becomes all porn and zero literature, and they become unable to maintain boundaries between fantasy and reality. But it also frustrates me when some radfems see this phenomenon and say that all fic is toxic and needs to go. Because I still believe that fic, even bad fic, is one of the purest distillations of female passion and creativity there is. There exists no male equivalent.

2/2 When most men like a show, they usually finish it and then move on to consume the next, or make one brief reddit post about it, or retweet some pornified fanart of a female character. The few REALLY passionate men might make one monetized youtube video praising the show, or create the pornified fanart themselves. But NEVER do you see men flocking together to post daily essays examining the psyche of a single character, or writing novel-length stories about someone else’s fictional characters and sharing them for free. Women OWN passion, because they consume stories in order to create more, and create stories without reward. Men just consume, and create only when reward is guaranteed. I get radfems being anti porn on camera because it exploits real women who are forced into sex for men’s profit, but I personally don’t think written porn about fictional characters is exploitive. No money is made with fic, no real person is raped; fic porn is made by women for women, and women depict men in fic far better than men deserve. I trust women to create weird gore/smut fic and art and still be decent people, or at least non-violent. Japanese women make some insanely kinky fanart, but I know they’re not out there raping anyone or being creepy in public. If fandom were truly grounds for exploitation, if you could reliably use fic to trick people into changing their morals, men would be getting in on the action too, but they’re not. Fandom is still a female-majority space and most men want nothing to do with it. I’ve certainly read fic that I thought was disturbing and disgusting, but I have the ability to click away, so I’d never argue that fic that bothers me personally shouldn’t have the right to exist. Because the moment I try to censor what someone else is allowed to write, they gain the right to censor me too. There is no single authority who can be trusted to decide what can and can’t be said without important voices getting silenced in the process, because everyone has personal biases. The whole “words are violence” narrative and censorship of gender critical voices is how trans ideology continues to reign. You can’t wake people up if you aren’t even allowed to speak. It might be an unpopular opinion, but I believe that any attempt to censor language will always escalate and come back to silence you someday, so I’d much rather everyone have the right to write whatever disgusting drivel they want as long as I get to say my piece too. No tyrannical regime has ever gotten off the ground without first silencing the opposition. Truth can only be found when everyone is allowed to speak freely, even the people you disagree with, so that everyone can make informed choices. Censoring people doesn’t change their internal beliefs, it only makes them lie about their beliefs in order to be liked. And I’d much rather people be open about their beliefs than me hazard a guess and feel betrayed later when their real beliefs come out. At the end of the day, I care most about material harm to real people and free speech. As long as fans mind their own business and don’t force their opinions or fantasies on anyone else, let them create what they want. Blacklist, block, disengage, put up the boundaries you need. Fandom was much more fun when most of us agreed upon these rules and being gender crit was the norm, but no one has self-possession anymore.

i know this took me forever to answer but there's really a lot here!! and i wanna divide your thoughts into three main big ideas to respond to, the first being, in your words: "they do not see female characters as fully human, or maybe it’s just too painful to confront the reality of female oppression without cloaking it in something else."

this is exactly it. i was in fandom spaces for a long time, i've been reading fanfic since i was in middle school, i've checked out a/b/o stuff and some of it, believe it or not, is actually well-written and surprisingly insightful about sex classes - the issue being that the authors substitute male characters. although not all a/b/o fic also has mpreg, i guess it would be called a/b/o-lite? i personally didn't read mpreg, i thought it was off-putting even during a time when i was trying despite my reservations to be open-minded and accepting of whatever someone wanted to write, but the appeal of a/b/o is basically as you said. whether they acknowledge it openly or not, women and girls are very aware of sex-based oppression.

m/m is already appealing to women, of all sexualities, for various reasons. it can be fetishistic of ssa men, absolutely. but, on the other hand, male characters are allowed to be fully human. m/m lets women explore relationships where both parties are allowed to be complete human beings. the cloak you mentioned can be worn in different ways by different women. for a time, without getting too into details, i couldn't read erotica with any women involved because it was too real to me; i didn't want to think of myself in a sexual context at all. so i liked m/m because i could disassociate from my own body. but tbh there's lots of reasons why women would want to see themselves in male characters. it's also a way to explore a same-sex relationship without misogyny. any woman who likes femslash can tell you... it is slim pickings out there. hope you like two feminine women and no real plotline. and bc anime men are basically women anyway, m/m is like, a poor woman's f/f.

a/b/o goes a step further, and what it shows us is that women do want to talk about sex-based oppression... in a vacuum. we don't want it to be happening to us, but wouldn't it be fucked up if there was a hierarchy of sex classes where men could be oppressed? and, with mpreg, what if men could be exploited for their reproduction? because men are fully human, and women want to be fully human, therefore we want to see ourselves in men. it's actually fascinating. i just wish women were self-aware about it, because it's this accidentally brilliant analogy of sex-based oppression and gender roles, and instead they're up to their noses in genderist bullshit :(

moving on to your second main idea: "because I still believe that fic, even bad fic, is one of the purest distillations of female passion and creativity there is. there is no male equivalent."

it's maybe not as popular of an opinion on radblr, but i completely agree. i am a staunch fanfic defender. i've seen women take these mainstream, impotent and unsatisfying male narratives (cough soul eater, rurouni kenshin) and write some of the most compelling character pieces i've ever read. women understand characters and storylines better than the original creators. it used to be believed that women lacked the capacity for artistic creation - at best, women could do portraiture and still life, but lacked the greater imagination required for high, inventive art. i would argue that the opposite is true. as you said, men only consume.

as for the last main takeaway, i don't think i can completely agree with you about censorship, but i don't think it's a black-and-white topic either. i really don't have a problem with women writing erotica for other women, i would not compare it to porn, there are no real people being exploited. i also think women fall into kink for different reasons than men, and don't have the same relationship to it that men do. i believe women can be trusted much more with disturbing content, whereas men lack the capacity to separate fiction from reality. they just don't process it as deeply.

but i think fiction can still cause harm, and that we have a responsibility to mitigate that harm. i just don't know what the exact answer is. jaws is one of my favorite movies, and it also caused a public panic that led to sharks being culled en masse, even though nothing in the movie indicated that sharks in real life are a real danger to people and need to be exterminated. are the movie creators responsible for how people responded to the film? i can't agree with that. just like i don't think nabokov is responsible for what pedophiles did to lolita. just because something is depicted in fiction doesn't mean it's endorsed by the author. but authors can still be irresponsible and create harmful content, some of it to the extent that it really shouldn't have been published, from a moral standpoint. but what do we do about it?

i agree that there's currently a problem with censorship based on moral grounds, because who decides morality? gender critical women are deplatformed for "hate speech" as decided by male supremacists and their handmaidens. it can be called hate speech to criticize your oppressors if your oppressors are the authority figures. you're right that there's no single authority that could ever be trusted to decide what we should be allowed to say and create. but on an individual scale, women are capable of making harmful and irresponsible content, and my problem with that isn't so much that she made it, but that it's so accessible and readily perpetuates itself, and maybe she made it "to cope" or whatever but then it should've stayed on her hard drive. but what kind of hard policy do you implement that doesn't stifle other creative women? i don't have a good answer. because i want women to keep creating, even if it's cringe, even if it's bad.

[olderthannetfic]

It’s time for me to be honest. (Btw this has nothing to do with language haha!) I am one of those ‘He’s mine!!’ fans that so often get slagged off. I guess the only difference is that I keep my mouth tightly shut and don’t publicly say such things.

I’d just like to explain my point of view and how I got there, even though my story is not at all representative of the ‘He’s mine’ crowd.

I’ve been a fictosexual since before puberty. I’ve had 3 great loves in my life, two during high school which both lasted a couple of years, then nothing in my 20s as it was the shit period of my life unlike what Instagram would have you believe, and now that things are settled down again and I’m an old lady in my early thirties, I’ve found the (fictional) love of my life and it’s been four intense years. Unfortunately, a long time after I fell hard for him it turned out he was a lot younger than me (though not underage) lol so that makes things…interesting and sometimes very spicy.

So here’s what I want to try and explain even though it doesn’t often make sense to myself either. People often look at those who ‘simp’ for fictional characters as it being like a temporary or silly crush. And for many it is. I’ve seen many, many mostly female fans obsess and post about my ‘partner’ (that’s what I’ll call him from now on) for months and then abruptly stop or get bored when a new show or media comes along. This is not it for me. I hate the term simp. While yes, humourously I’ll ‘simp’ or make horny posts about my partner, the feelings I have are just as intense, if not more intense, than I’d have for a real person. I’ve only met one other person, irl or online, who shares the same commitment and intensity of feeling for a fictional character. And before you start imagining me with some sort of merch shrine and a tacky body pillow which I take on dates or talk to or whatever, I hate to disappoint you but I’m not a ‘waifuist’ in that sense. The only merch I own are a Funkopop and a t-shirt.

When I met this character, I felt understood. I felt a deep and intense connection to his life experiences which in many ways mirrored my own and felt I instinctively understood his emotions, goals, thought processes etc. Many people think that this is the same as a celebrity crush. It’s not. We don’t get to know celebrities on a deep level. But for fictional characters we often do. We get to see how they feel, what they think, their opinions on things. We see them in their darkest and lowest moments, their most vulnerable and to me my partner became a real person in my mind, and no, not in a schizophrenic or ‘something not right with me neurologically’ type of way. I don’t hear his voice or hallucinate him there. It’s hard to explain. It’s just, to my mind he is real.

So, to me he is the love of my life. Imagine seeing your spouse or significant other romantically involved with another person. It fucking hurts. This is what I feel when I see people ship my partner with themselves or their OC. I feel like I have been betrayed and cheated on. It literally hurts in my chest and I have cried after seeing this type of fanart before. I also ship him with an OC that is not actually a direct self-insert and differs from me in several major ways. And I write fanfic. A lot of very smutty fanfic, but ironically only xReader type which has been very, very well received. In fact, I’d say I’ve written the most m/f smut for this character and have gained a modest but loyal readership. The thing I often get told is how much people love getting lost in my stories and how intimately connected they feel to him when they read my reader insert fics and how intense and emotional it gets. I don’t know why, but when people comment on my fanfics that it makes them fall in love with my partner even more I feel happy and proud that I could write something like that. In any other context it breaks my heart.

I never tell people, either in my fanfiction life or my canonxoc fanart life, that I am personally in love and attached to this man because I don’t want to be one of those people that seem to get so much eye roll and hate. I don’t want to come across as possessive and start drama. But in my mind, he is only mine. He is the thing that makes me most happy in the world, that got me out of depression and suicidality when I was unwell and going through chronic illness. And still keeps me going. I understand him and he understands me like nobody else. He is literally the embodiment of my perfect man.

And before anyone says I need to go outside and touch grass or get professional help…I am a well adjusted member of society. I have a complex job, a dog, own my own place, I visit my family and have a great group of friends. I am not sitting miserable and weird and alone in my dark room obsessively scrolling.

But please try to understand, for some of us, a very serious minority, this is real. The feelings we have are just like the feelings you would have for a real person. This isn’t a disorder and we don’t need ‘help’. It’s just our objects of affection are different to yours. And unfortunately, we have to share our soulmates with hundreds and thousands of others. This is why I can’t really participate in my fandom either, because I can’t keep seeing bad takes on him and seeing him shipped with others. But it’s ok. I’m happy in my world of smutty fanfic and fanart.

--

People elsewhere will judge because they think you should love a real person instead. Plenty of people around here can understand this depth of feeling for a fictional character just fine. It's the lack of ability to share that sets you apart.

[hidelias]

A bend in space-time Season 2 - [Chapter 12: Heavy handfuls of curls]

[Chapter 12: Heavy handfuls of curls] Links : AO3 - Wattpad - FFN

With a sort of determined sigh, he starts walking through the half-lit corridor towards the bathroom. His trajectory is even less rectilinear than usual, and he bumps into the wall on the left, then the right, as if he's drunk when he's not. Eventually, however, he reaches his goal, where a pale light falls from the skylight onto the sink. All of Kitty's things are still there, on the shelves. As if her towels, straightening iron and night cream were still waiting to be used. I don't know how he stands seeing this. But he and I clearly don't have the same relationship to death.

"What are you doing?" In one swift motion, he opens one of the white drawers nestled against the bathtub, and pulls out a long pair of scissors. "Maybe I'll have a better chance of convincing him if I look less like Rasputin."

His hand no longer trembling, he starts trimming his beard just below his chin, and I'm grinning like an idiot. The last time I saw him without it was literally in another time, on the stage of the Icarus Theatre. Nevertheless, his gesture marks the end of something. And - more than ever tonight - I feel that the 'Destiny's Children' travels are well and truly behind us.

"Rasputin… don't be hard on yourself," I joke, leaning against the doorjamb. "Come on, let's say… Dumbledore. A lost in Hollywood Dumbledore".

He doesn't even laugh, resolute, and persists somewhat ragefully, until his long goatee falls to the bottom of the sink. He roughly polishes it, staring at its reflection in the poor light, postponing a proper shave. Then he starts cutting his hair, pulling out heavy handfuls of curls more or less randomly, which fall onto the tiled floor, everywhere around him. As if unleashing his fury on his mane could relieve him of all the last months spent hating his very own Vedas.

(…)

↝↝↝↝ Read 'A bend in space-time' ↜↜↜↜ Full chapter : AO3 - Wattpad - FFN Season 1 completed : AO3 - Wattpad - FFN Season 2 in progress : AO3 - Wattpad - FFN

I chose to insert an OC - Rin - into the plot of The Umbrella Academy, appearing almost only in deleted scenes. This fic is not a self-insert nor a OC-centric fic : Rin exists to flesh out the canon characters, and the fic is mostly focusing on Klaus. Please read the introduction for more details ♡

Any comment will make my day! ♡

[fabdante]

Fic asks!! Fic asks!! 17, 23, 29 and 47!!!

thank you friend!!! 💖 (questions from this ask meme here)

17. What highly specific AU do you want to read or write even though you might be the only person to appreciate it?

I am full of highly specific AUs! I love a highly specific AU! I often feel like I only think of highly specific AUs and I am very happy this way.

I think the most specific would be these really, really niche crossover AUs me and my girlfriend made of like every single video game we liked at the time the time we made them. The most specific of those was set in Rapture from Bioshock. Except Rapture was set up with different leadership in the 40s/50s. Adam was still discovered, but said leaders implemented heavy restrictions on it that led to the city surviving until the 1980s, in which it had found itself increasingly sectioned off into different gangs/factions. There was also a lot about the impact of Adam on genetics. I have no idea who the audience for that is, but it would only be more specific to me if it was the 90s honestly.

23. What’s a trope, AU, or concept you’ve never written, but would like to?

This is hard. I have little impulse control so like, if the fleeting thought crosses my mind I will write down something. I am also very self indulgent so if I like an idea, I will write it in some form or try to.

I really would like to write a DmC or DMC band au. I struggle to figure out any of the specifics. I have started writing sort of a DMC band AU, though, and I think it's the closest I'm going to get to the band AU idea. (The concept of that one is that it's excerpts of a biography about 90s grunge band Devil May Cry. Which was ironically another idea I was really interested in writing, like a story told through interviews and stuff.)

29. What songs would be (or are) on a playlist for [insert fic]? Explain your choices if you want!

Picking a fic was hard. I went with Crossroads of Catharsis and Contemplation because I really love that fic and I never considered a playlist for it. The vibe is introspection, lo-fi, and also some screaming.

Sleep Patterns by Merchant Ships (I felt like this fit the introspective vibe, this song to me is peak reboot Dante introspection and it just felt fitting here)

Come As You Are (Nirvana Lo-fi) by Tedi Mercury and Alien Cake Music (the original to me encompasses something essential about the themes of DmC/DMC as a whole, and the lo-fi fit the Sam Cham vibe)

Seize the Day by Wax Tailor (lo-fi for that post 'we maybe caused a tiny apocalypses in our city...now what?' vibe)

Heart Heart Head by Meg Myers (very much the Kat and Vergil mood of the fic to me)

Press Pause by Pretty Lights (some more introspective lo-fi to end us off)

47. If [insert fic] was a pair of shoes, what kind would it be? Describe the shoes.

I'm going to answer this for Detours/The Detours Series, my Zutara fic (I named the series the Circumnavigators of Celestial Bodies, the series isn't up on Ao3 just yet though!).

If Circumnavigators was a pair of shoes it would be the first pair of high top converse you buy in high school. You were like a freshmen and now it's senior year. And the shoes are still mostly together, if not a bit beat up for constant use over the past 4 years. They've walked a lot of miles, a lot of halls, a lot of adventures. They're worn in perfectly, formed exactly to the contours of your feet. And they still probably have some years left in them, even if the canvas isn't as sturdy as it used to be and the laces are dirty. But the best thing about the shoes, the absolute best thing, is all the little writing on them. Because you and your best friend who you went on all those adventures with, you wrote on them. They wrote on your shoes and you theirs, and you look down at your feet and you see all these little doodles and notes to you. And some the sharpies faded but some were just written yesterday and they make you smile.

thank you again for the ask!! 💖💖

[dulcewrites]

I spent nearly 2 hours on Tumblr on tag Aemond × oc and guess what 99% of them are Aemond and his sister/twin sister/niece. It's really hard task to find non Targaryen/Velaryon oc. At this point I am just fed up with this fandom. I actually did a little experiment and searched Aegon × oc tag and when it comes to Aegon it's versatile because oc isn't Aegon's sister or niece and I can't believe that I like Aemond as character more than Aegon, but I avoid Aemond fic or one shots (except fmo naturally) and read a lot about Aegon and all this fics about Aegon changing himself for his love interest made me love Aegon. This fandom is really crazy, I love him as character but I can't enjoy it because all these writers thought that Aemond could only fall in love with member of his close family. I knew that his words about doing his duty if Alicent only betrothed him and Helaena will cause all fandom to think he is so much into incest, but I hadn't realised how big is that. So I just keep reading Aegon's fics because they are the only ones that don't have incest basically bombarding all the readers. They are my refuge after seeing so much insert with Aemond

I understand your frustration. I do think there is slight lack of diversity (in many avenues) when it comes to Aemond, which is unfortunate bc he is such a fascinating character. Taking into account the book and show, there is a lot of stories you can tell through him. I do think this tends to happen with popular characters, regardless of the fandom. There seems to be a trend or trope that gets sort of placed on them, whether it is considered out of character or not.

I’m still shocked that “I would perform my duty (basically if mother wanted me to)” line got turned into yep he’d def fuck his close family member. He’s like 11, no dragon to his name, and clearly drinking the koolaid of “these are the things ‘real’ targs” do. It’s ironic that this is the storyline being placed one of the of the few targs (in this part of history) that never had to/was never groomed to want a family member. It’s just… ??? Idk a choice I guess. I see this more in the hotd side versus the asoiaf/got side but it seems like a lot of people take the incest as sort of an endorsement/a need to have a Targ story be interesting versus a cautionary tale about the family.

Aegon is an interesting person the sense that he is so… anti targ. He very clearly begins to spiral after he is forced to marry and sleep with his sister (though that does not negate his actions. Helaena also had to marry her brother and didn’t do what he did. If we are going based off the show).

Aemond (along with haelena and Rhaenyra imo) start to veer into self insert territory but in different ways. Helaena and Rhaenyra often get stripped of anything so they can be placed in relationships with the popular guys (Aemond and Daemon). And Aemond’s feelings get distorted to fit whatever narrative. He gets shipped with anyone and everyone even if it makes no sense.

Now this is ok but fanfic is just that… fan fiction. People can write and read what they want. It is all self indulgent to a certain extent. Even the stuff I write. That being said, it can get repetitive and sometimes harmful depending on the content we are talking about.

[yellowocaballero]

hii for the fic ask game: 4, 16, 17?

4. What detail in [insert fic] are you really proud of?

Fuck, I'm an egotist and there's genuinely quite a few. I'm kind of a detail oriented writer, and I like putting in little stuff that makes a world feel real. It's not always the obvious stuff like the favorite TV show (although funny to establish that Marc uses TLC to enable his self-hatred), sometimes it's the dumb stuff like the fact that Jake gives the NYC pigeons little telenovela plotlines. Also, somehow, anything a baby does. I should write babies more often, if you just write their lives as little telenovelas they are instant comedy.

There's lots of little stuff in best life I loved putting in. I did a ton of research for the Iron Fist story (which was pretty low key but I was actually pretty insanely proud of that one - the worse the original property the greater my pride when I fix it lol), and I enjoyed putting in both a lot of historical and cultural references while tossing in some little anecdotes or real experiences from my monastery days.

Almost similarly, best life! Peter was dressed exactly in his classic 1970s John Romita Sr outfit and trust me, he talked EXACTLY like he talked back then, perfect mimic. I loved doing it.

And almost everything in that Buffy fic but that fic was just such a love letter to Buffy.

16. What’s an AU you would love to read (or have read and loved)?

God, typically if there's something I would love to read I just go write it. Except for guilty pleasure AUs yall have to step up your vampire AU game PLEASE I also tend to seek out fics above tropes. I am kind of a sucker for BAMF version of characters, I used to read quite a bit of Peggy Sues,

17. What highly specific AU do you want to read or write even though you might be the only person to appreciate it?

Answered!

[aberooski]

fanfic ask: 5, 13, 21, 24! 💫

Yay! I love answering questions!! 😆

5) Do you prefer to read/write long fics or short fics?

- in terms of writing, I prefer to write long fics. I tent to lean towards doing the most approximately all of the time when I write, and it makes it very difficult for me to write short fics. And honestly I wish it didn't but long fics are the way for me baby.

- reading though, I think I tend to lean more toward short fics. If I'm just looking for something casually to get my fix, I find myself engaging with more short fics. But on the flip side, I write long fics so I love them, and if I come across one that piques my interest and really grabs me, then man I'm hooked and it will consume my life akskskk but generally speaking I find myself reading more short fics than long ones. I think because I have such a hard time writing them, I'm drawn more to shorter ones when I read. Or something like that I guess?

13) What are some of your writing/reading pet peeves?

- Y’know I haven't really thought about this all that much before. Of course the standard mixed up spellings of there/their/they're and your/you're because good lord people it's not that hard 😭

- I also fuckin hate the trope when like a character is captured and they make friends with the guard or whatever and they like turn good and shit ugh 😭 or when there's a fuckin self insert that's a bad guy but makes friends with the good guys and turns good no. No. I don't mind oc's, I've had some in fics, I mean Angel's Tears and OUAD have Fiona and her crew as minor antagonists, and OUAD and SBH have Mrs. Rhodes and Mrs. Princeton. But the thing is they're just kinda there. They don't overstep in their roles. And when I was like 12/13, I 100% wrote self inserts too because everybody does at some point in their lives and that's normal and fine, and they don't really bug me all that much. But let bad guys just be bad guys sometimes 😭 I want the actual characters to save each other and have that satisfying reunion 😭 Ireally don't know why that makes me so angry but it does aksksk

21) What are your top 3 fics you've written and why?

- oh boy this is such a loaded question akskks 😅 Now we all know I'm of the opinion that favorite and best are not inherently mutually exclusive, so this changes they way I think about it a bit.

- so in that event, I think I'd say my top 3 fics would be: Once Upon A Duelist, Sons of The Stars, and Salt In the Wound.

Honorable mention goes to Sustained by Hate (Abby's version)(from the vault)

-If I had to explain why, well I think we might have another novel of an answer on our hands but I'll try to be brief 😅

- OUAD I've said before is my favorite fic I've ever written as it stands right now, and also just so happens to be the one I feel is my best. I think it has the most solid plot I've written in a long time, even if you ignore that it's a Sleeping Beauty adaptation so the plot was already there to begin with. But only with the basic plot line, everything I did to put my own spin on it worked really well, and it's the best executionl of a romance plot I've ever done aksksk 😅 and there's just some fuckin bangers of dialog and character interactions in it that make me giggle and kick my feet in the air like a school girl and also sob my eyes out.

- Also y'know, it gets bonus points for being a Sleeping Beauty adaptation which is my favorite movie of all time, and Aurora's my favorite princess and I've been in love with Phillip for as long as I've had conscious thought and memory so having Chazz and Atticus in their roles was the best ever 😭 plus Slade and Jagger actually die which is what I want for them. Perfection.

- Still really wanna do an OUAD 2 but really gotta clear some stuff from my WIP list first 😭😭😭

- Sons of The Stars, of course my 136k GX fantasyish au I built from the ground up. I'd love to say it's my magnum opus, but it really isn't. But I love it so much, it's very important to me. Ironically it is also the only fic I've done where Chazz and Atticus have 0 interaction because they're never in the same room at the same time. And when they are, they don't interact on screen 😭 of course I wrote it before I knew I shipped them but I digress.

- There's a lot of elements from season 3 in that fic where the plot is concerned honestly, Yubel wanting to combine all 12 dimensions which would destroy everything, Axel's entire storyline is a parallel of his arc in the survival duel arc, Jaden and Jesse being not at all straight, and so on. Honestly there's probably ploy holes and stuff and some stuff that's confusing that I don't explain well or whatever, but the general plot I think is so cool and interesting 😭

- Not my best execution of a romance plot but it also was the first time I actually tried to do that at all so I give myself a little grace for that. Also I did refer to Yubel as she/her throughout the fic like they do in the dub because that's what was just how I was introduced to that character and that became default in my brain. But eventually I will get around to going back and fixing that I promise I have so many fics to write right now 😭

- But also what I love about that fic is the wardrobe I designed for it it's so good 😭 I've shared drawings of that before for anybody reading this who hasn't seen those asksks and I did that just kinda for fun since I was in high school when I started planning and writing that fic and I just kinda started drafting up wardrobes in class instead of working 😅 but after designes and redesigns and all that I fuckin love the wardrobe for this fic and it was such a fuckin awesome creative outlet that I needed.

- also some of my best chapter titles are in the fic bro, like some of them are so fuckin good 😭 Skyfall, Secrets of Ages Past, Fragility of The Heart, Purity of The Heart, and Confessions of The Heart (the trinity as I affectionately call those chapters) among others. I'm not good at fic titles but dammit I'm good at chapter titles sometimes 😤

- and real quick before I move on, the entirety of Chazz and Alexis's relationship in this fic. She's all kinds of messed up emotionally in this and she's grown jaded and cold, and she hated him at the start. She hated him when they met when they were kids and she never let go of that or let him change in her mind all those years. But Jaden gets her to think that she's wrong, and when they meet him after they rescue him for Crowler, she accepts that she was wrong, but she's still cold to him. Alexis likes Chazz, not like likes him but she's endeared by him, but she doesn't like that she likes him and she ends up staying cold to him for a while. They argue like a married couple the whole time, and in Fragility of The Heart when she's overtaken by the influence of the darkness seeping out of the core of the 11th dimension because of Yubel, she's not in her right mind and she says a lot of harsh things and makes accusations she shouldn't be saying. And Chazz has to reveal to her the scars he's gotten from his brothers and brings her back down to earth and grounds her back into reality. He heard her crying to Atticus earlier in chapter 12 so he knows he's the only one who can get through to her then, and when he does she softens up on him from then on. And all of this ends up leading up to Alexis turning to Chazz to be her shoulder to cry on at the end of the penultimate chapter. The first of now 2 times they've had that FF7R Cloti moment.

I love the evolution of their relationship on her end especially, she grows the most throughout the entire story of everyone I think, and it just makes me feel good inside.

- and my number 3, Salt in the Wound.

My aftermath to episode 95... I've ranted enough about this, but it's just such a cathartic fic for me. One of the free short fics I've been able to do, and I just love the actual writing. So much of it was stream of consciousness, and I cried a lot working on it. I'll come to Sy's defense at any time anywhere and against anyone. Especially his own brother. He's my favorite character, he's also me in more ways than I care to think about sometimes. I love that fic so much, but it's also really hard to read sometimes. I know I'll write things that hurt me more, I know I will. But right now that's the one that hurts me the most. After everything Zane did and how far he'd fallen, Syrus still cared about him. Syrus still loved him and wanted his brother's acceptance. And writing that just hurt my heart in an entirely different way than anything else I've done before. But the whole experience like I said was so cathartic and I needed it. So it's one of my favorites.

24) If I could tell my past self something before I posted my first fic, I think I'd have something to say at various points in time. Like my first grade school fic, middle school fic, and high school fic eras. Nothing from before high school exists anymore, but no matter what specifically I might think so say to each of those past mes, I think the same thing that would be said to all of them would be not to ever for a second forget to have fun. And to tell myself that you're gonna feel like a failure sometimes. Your stuff won't take off right away, you're gonna feel burnt out, you're gonna feel bad. But you're also gonna love it. You're gonna feel the best you've felt in your life when you write. And don't worry, there are gonna be people that love your work.

I'd tell myself to just sit back and enjoy it. It's all gonna be worth it. You're not wasting your time. You're only gonna get better. I won't say to change anything I've written, I'd let myself write the crap and the actual flops and things I'm embarrassed by how bad they were when I look back now. Because that's what led me here. That's how I learned. That was me being an authentic kid.

I'd tell past me to smile and be proud of herself.

[kasienda]

2, 4, and 5 for the writer asks!

2. what's a fic that took you to an emotional/dark/hard place?

Invisible Wounds - Sailor Moon - AmiZoi

So... I self inserted myself into this fic as Zoisite's mother. Not because I feel any super connection to Zoisite, but because I figured that was a really really easy way to make her feel real as an original character with just a line or two of dialogue here or there. She's a minor character. Like super minor. But since she's me, I gave Zoi's little brother the same disorder as my son (when I could have picked ANTYHING else). And like, it's a life limiting condition and for plot reasons I needed his little brother to die. (Do you see where I'm going with this??) So I did a ton of research specifically into how my son's disorder will eventually kill him. And then I wrote the fucking scene. Let's just say I cried doing the research, I cried writing the scene, and every now and again I go back and read it and cry all over again. Like WHY would I do this to myself? (I think it's because I needed to know, and doing it for a fic meant I could pretend there was a layer of psychological defense, which there absolutely wasn't).

The ironic thing is the research that killed me for this piece is for an unposted chapter near the end of the story. And it's getting increasingly difficult for me to work on this story because it is a medical drama centered around an epidemic that I started writing in 2016 before pandemics were a part of my daily life. And it's not that writing about an epidemic is hard/dark, so much as it feels like work, instead of an escape. So I'm not sure anyone is even going to get to read the scene! (But I got a comment on this story a few weeks back and I reread a lot of the upcoming bits, and it's sooooo good. It's a story that deserves to be told... too bad I don't currently have those mental emotional spoons).

4. what fic of your own do you read for comfort?

Best Friends and Boyfriends - Miraculous Ladybug - Adrino

This is the most self indulgent fic I have ever written in my life, and when I'm low and just want to smile and laugh, this is the fic I go to most often. I lvoe the relationship, its development, the conflict, the make up from their fight, and the reveal! And it is the perfect length to get some development, and still be read in about an hour.

And honestly, I can reread almost any of my fics. I will often pick the one that I haven't read in the longest amount of time (also depends on what I'm in the mood for), and then sit back and kinda just be amazed that I wrote the thing? It's crazy. But I love that I have my own little library that is kinda tailored just to me!

5. what fic of your own won't you read?

I don't know that I have a fic I won't read. (See above), but the one that comes closest?

Anything to Protect You - Sailor Moon - Usamamo Fake Dating

Now, I'm actually insanely proud of this fic, and to this day think it's one of the better things I've written. It's got one of the best kisses I've ever written, some positively adorable dates, one of the best battles I've ever written, and a really satisfying reveal moment!!

So why don't I like to read it? Because I hated writing it!! It was a gift for an exchange and so it had to be finished. And it was tailored to my giftee so perfectly and I was excited about THAT, but it was late and ended up taking up a good six months. Actually, one of the things I LOVE about this fic is that it really taught me that I could 1) be disciplined and finish the things I wanted to finish whatever my brain had to say about it (ha!), and 2) could write a really good story even when I myself wasn't invested.

I do occasionally reread it and am floored by some of the moments in it, but it also brings up all the feelings/memories of obligation and forcing myself to work on it when my heart wanted to work on other things. So I think I resent it sometimes that OTHER things didn't get finished instead (like Invisible Wounds!!). But on the other hand, I'm really really glad it exists as well. And clearly this one is going to be read by way more people than my rarepair content ever will. Feelings are complicated.

Thank you @karkalicious769 for the ask!

Send me some Deep fic writer Asks!