#while the other friend is stuck figuring out their sexuality and feelings for their best friend who is now dating someone else | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jaeyunverse · 1 year

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the perks of having a hot best friend

pairing: lee jeno x fem!reader

genres: fluff, crack, mild angst, best friends to lovers, college au

wc: 14336

warnings: profanity, sexual jokes, jeno is shirtless in a scene phew, too many idol features SORRY i lowk lost track of who i’ve included. i think that is all but lmk if you find something else!

summary: having a hot best friend is nice until you start getting butterflies in your stomach every single time you look at them.

note: JAEYUNVERSE COMEBACK WOOO i’ve missed writing long fics so much omfg but i’m shitting bricks as we speak LOL it’s been a while since i’ve posted something big and i won’t lie i’m hella nervous. i rlly hope you guys enjoy this fic ♡ please don’t hesitate to give me your feedback! here’s to hoping my writing skills haven’t become as rusty as i think i have hehe :’))

masterlist

𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐊𝐒 !

01. an abundance of freebies and discounts

Lee Jeno knew the power his smile held.

All it took was one flirty laugh combined with those sleepy eyes of his for people to melt. Being the resourceful person you were, you utilised that talent of his to its full extent.

“Can you go and flirt with the cashier so she gives us a free muffin?”

Your best friend gave you a dirty look. “You do realise this is supposed to be your treat, right?”

“I am paying!” you exclaimed. “Just go do your thing and make her feel generous enough to slip a free dessert in our order.”

Jeno rolled his eyes, but you knew you’d won. You almost always did. “Fine, whatever. You owe me one though.”

“I’m feeding you because I owe you one,” you pointed out. “This makes us equal.”

“How riveting. I have to work so the person who owes me doesn’t have to owe me anymore.”

“We can argue about this for hours or you can haul ass to the counter and place the damn order. I’ll Venmo you the money the moment you’re back,” you promised.

Sliding out of the booth, Jeno said, “You’re lucky you’re cute. If this were Jaemin, I wouldn’t be letting him off the hook easily.”

You stuck your tongue out at him and shooed him away. Narrowing his eyes, he grabbed your wrist and pulled you along.

“Hey!” you cried. “Don’t take me with you! The flirting won’t have any effect on her if she thinks we’re together!”

“Everyone thinks we’re together,” Jeno muttered and got in line behind an old man. “She checked me out when we entered the cafe, saw you arm-in-arm with me and gave you the dirtiest look to ever exist.”

You snorted. “Liar. You might be an eye candy but you do not command such a high level of attention.”

“I’m telling the truth!” he argued. “I would know because I was checking out the drink she placed on the counter. I was trying to figure out what the person’s order might have been to get something so incredibly delicious-looking. I saw her out of the corner of my eye.”

“Oh.” You frowned and took a step forward when the line moved ahead. “That’s unfortunate. Should we go to another cafe and try our hand at getting something free there?”

“How about you stop being such a cheap skate for once?”

Slapping his shoulder hard, you grumbled, “I have to bear the weight of my goddamn rent alone while you share yours with three others! I need to cut down on certain things, asshole.”

“My offer to move in with you next semester still stands.” Jeno wiggled his eyebrows. “I’m a really good housemate; ask the others.”

“You live with boys. The disgusting things you do don’t bother them because they do them too.”

He closed his mouth and thought about it for a second. Then, “Touché.”

You rolled your eyes, but before you could make another snarky comment, a pleasant voice interrupted, “Good morning. What can I get for you today?”

Jeno averted his gaze to the girl standing behind the counter and let a lazy smile take form on his lips. You raised a brow and watched in amusement.

“Hey there. Can I get a Strawberries & Crème Frappuccino with 1 pump caramel syrup, 1 pump hazelnut syrup, and 1 pump toffee-nut syrup? Java chips too, please.”

The girl—Lia, according to her name tag—looked surprised to see him blatantly flirting with you right beside him. Maybe he was right about every stranger assuming the two of you to be together, though you couldn’t fathom why. “O—okay.”

“What do you want, friend?” Jeno stressed the last word. Refraining to roll your eyes a second time, you said,

“Iced coffee without milk. Could you add some sugar to the brew? I prefer my drinks to be sweet.”

“Of course,” she said and nodded once, unfazed even after learning of Jeno’s status as an eligible bachelor.

Snorting under your breath, you whispered to him, “Lia doesn’t give a fuck. You’re lacking.”

He scoffed and nudged you away. “No, I’m not,” he whisper-snapped. “Get out of here. You’re killing my vibe.”

You deadpanned and gave him a don’t-bullshit-me look but retreated to your booth nonetheless. The last thing you heard Lia ask was: “Anything else?”

You’d only been sitting and scrolling through your phone for a few minutes before a hand slapped a receipt on the table in front of you.

Glancing up, you inquired, “What?”

“Read the order.”

Dropping your gaze to the piece of paper again, you picked it up. An appreciative frown tugged at your lips as Jeno slid into his seat. “You managed to get us a free muffin and a free bagel?”

“Don’t ever question my talents again,” he ordered and leaned back. Resting his arm on the cushion behind him and placing his ankle on his knee, his attitude was nothing short of a king’s. “I won’t tolerate any further slander.”

“Uh-huh,” you muttered, utterly unimpressed. Though you admit, a smile threatened to break out on your face and you had to bite your lip to keep it from escaping.

Jeno raised an eyebrow, as if waiting for something. All you did was stare at him, and when he realised you wouldn’t budge, he did an extremely horrible and high-pitched imitation of you that should have deserved jail. “Thank you sooooooo much, Jeno! If it weren’t for your flirting skills, I wouldn’t have anything to eat. You’re my one and only saviour, and I don’t know what I would have done without—”

“Order for Jeno!” Lia hollered.

Said-boy flinched and clutched his heart with his hand. “What the… That was quick.” Clearing his throat, he turned his attention back to you, the tips of his ears red and his face flushed. “Whatever. I’ll be right back. Venmo me the bill amount.”

You snickered and watched him get up. However, before he could move out of earshot, you called his name. “Thank you for your service.”

Jeno glanced at you over his shoulder and did nothing but observe you for a moment. Then, a lopsided grin took form on his lips and he mock saluted.

“You’re welcome.”

02. gives good boy advice

“What are you doing here?”

Pushing past you, Jeno strolled into your living room and plopped down on your sofa. “Is that any way to greet your best friend?”

You rolled your eyes and closed the front door. Sitting down beside him, you placed your laptop on your lap again and resumed going through your notes. “I’m being serious. Were we supposed to hang out today? Because I cannot. I still have three finals left.”

“No, we didn’t have any plans today,” he said, peering over your shoulder to check what subject you were studying. It was Economics. Horrible memories from the previous semester resurfaced and he shuddered before continuing, “Your text said you wanted to talk about something important?”

You paused and glanced at him. “So you came over?”

“Do you want me to leave?” Jeno frowned. “I thought it would be better to talk in person.”

He stood up and dusted himself off. Eyes widening, you grabbed his wrist and forced him back to his original position. “That’s not what I meant! I do want to talk to you but—it’s weird. I don’t feel like dealing with whatever has happened right now and I’m getting second thoughts about asking you for advice.”

Concern seeped into Jeno’s face. “Woah, are you okay? You don’t have to explain anything right now. Just tell me one thing: do I need to beat anyone up? I’ve got a few gym buddies who are ripped.”

You huffed a laugh and placed your laptop on the coffee table. Crossing your legs, you turned to face him. Upon watching you get comfortable, your best friend rolled his shoulders back and did the same thing.

“Before I say anything, I need you to promise me that you won’t laugh. Or make fun of me. Or call me an idiot.”

“I won’t,” he answered immediately, though he wondered what issue warranted you to require his word.

Taking a deep breath, you nodded. “YangYang asked me out a few days ago. I’ve always liked him, but not in a way that’s not platonic. I fucked up and instead of rejecting him right there, I asked him for some time to think it over and kinda led him to believe that I would say yes.”

Jeno raised an eyebrow. “How?”

“I told him he’s my type,” you mumbled, cringing at the memories that came rushing back.

“What?!” he exclaimed. “How the hell did you manage to do that?”

“I don’t know!” you whined and buried your face in your hands. “He came up to me when I was in the library and asked if we could talk! I didn’t know he was going to drop such a bomb on me so I said yes. Then he started talking about how he’s always cherished our friendship and how he’s so glad to have me.

“I started suspecting where his train of thought was headed when he added a but to his sentence. He said he’s liked me for a while now and he couldn’t keep it to himself anymore. I was flabbergasted once he was done! I’ve always viewed him as a good friend and I didn’t want to just turn his heart down!”

“So you told him he was your type?” Jeno asked incredulously. “I know I promised to not call you an idiot but you’re really fucking stupid, Y/N! It’s going to be hella awkward when the group meets up!”

You groaned and closed your eyes shut, letting yourself fall on your back. “That’s not even the worst part.”

Jeno grabbed your wrists and hauled you back up. His face was barely a few inches away from yours when he ordered, “Explain.”

Taking a deep breath, you continued. “I told YangYang that he was cute and my type but I wasn’t in a position to think about going out with anyone with still two weeks of finals left to get through. I thought he would drop it but he asked me if I would think about his confession after our exams and I felt terrible telling him the truth. So I said I would. Yeji called me last night and said she set me up on a blind date with this guy in her class. You know how fast word spreads here. YangYang is going to know I dangled him on strings only to go on a date with someone else!”

“You’re going on a blind date? With whom?”

You flicked Jeno’s forehead. “That’s not the issue!”

“Well, I want to know!” he sputtered and slapped your hand away.

“I don’t know! Frankly, I don’t care either. I made a bet with Yeji and I lost. Now I have to spend an evening with a random guy I don’t even want to seek a romantic relationship with.”

Your best friend sighed in frustration. “This might be one of your biggest fuck-ups till now.”

“I know,” you said quietly and dropped your gaze to your lap in shame.

“You’ll have to apologise to YangYang and tell him the truth. He’s a good guy and he doesn’t deserve any of this.”

“I know.”

“Hey,” Jeno said softly. You glanced at him to see he’d gotten up and was holding his out for you. “Come here.”

You rose to your feet and let him envelop you in his comforting embrace. Burying your face in his chest, you whispered, “I never wanted to hurt YangYang. I don’t want to lose him as a friend.”

“You won’t as long as you come clean and explain everything. Don’t insult him further by giving him more half-truths. Guys would rather know what’s the real deal than be lied to and find out from someone else. Not only is it hurtful, but it’s a huge blow to the ego.”

Your lips curled in a small smile and you leaned back a little to look at his face. “Is this about your mom lying to you about the tooth fairy?”

“Damn right it is,” he grumbled. “I gave an entire speech about her being my favourite person in the whole world. That’s not something you recover from easily.”

“It’s been 15 years.”

“It’ll take me another 15 to come to terms with the fact that I used to rip my loose teeth out and place them under my pillow when I needed money urgently.”

You laughed and pulled yourself out of his arms. “I can’t believe I’m taking guy advice from you.”

“Why?” Jeno exclaimed. “I’m a guy too! Plus, I always give good advice!”

You giggled and plopped down on the sofa again. “I know. But you’re also Jeno. I’ve never thought of you as just a guy.”

“I don’t know if I should be flattered or offended.”

“How about you sit your ass down and help me study now that you’re here? I made flash cards.”

Snatching the stack from your hand, Jeno teased, “Oh, how would you survive without me?”

“I don’t have to wonder about that shit.” You grinned. “There’s no way in hell you’re getting rid of me anytime soon.”

He laughed. “And thank fuck for that.”

03. hugs always make you feel safe thanks to all the beef underneath

You were going to drag Jeno to the seventh circle of Hell.

You couldn’t afford to go grocery shopping with him when you had a huge exam the next day. You hadn’t studied shit and were one “have you prepared for tomorrow’s final?” away from a mental breakdown.

It didn’t help that Yeji had called you in the middle of the night to clear a doubt she had from a chapter you didn’t even know had been covered.

You’d been panicking ever since and it felt like you were going to get a heart attack at any moment.

“Doritos or Lays?”

“Kick to the nuts or knuckles to the jaw?”

Your best friend tore his gaze from the rack of chips and eyed you warily. “I said I’ll help you study tonight.”

“You don’t understand, Jeno!” you exclaimed and ran a hand through your messy hair, pacing in the supermarket aisle impatiently. “I’m going to fail! Fail!”

Groaning, Jeno grabbed your arm and forced you to face him. He held your shoulders and looked you in the eyes, enunciating each word as he reiterated, “You’re not going to fail. We’re going to pull an all-nighter in the library, but we need to be stocked up on food before we do that.”

You sighed painfully. It burned your eyes to just focus on anything—how the hell were you supposed to stay awake for another day and write a three-hour-long exam after that?

“You could have come here without dragging me with you,” you muttered. “I could have been studying at home instead of wasting precious time.”

Jeno frowned. “Any more time in front of your laptop and you would have gone insane, Y/N. Your eyes are completely red.”

“Oh, that’s not because of the screen time. I cried before you came to check on me.”

Huffing a small laugh that bordered on exasperation, amusement and worry, Jeno threw a few packets of Doritos in the shopping cart before slinging an arm around your neck. You let him pull you against him and wrapped your arms around his waist as the two of you began walking.

“Well, you needed to get out anyway. I don’t remember the last time I saw you leave your apartment.”

“I stepped outside yesterday to play with the neighbour’s cat,” you said defensively.

“Not good enough,” Jeno popped. “We’re going to go get a massage once we’re done shopping.”

You stopped in your tracks and peeled yourself away from him. “The final is in twenty-eight hours!” you yelled, staring at him incredulously. “Are you fucking stupid?!”

“So you have plenty of time to de-stress before you start studying again!” he chirped, paying no heed to your concerns nor the people who had heard your outburst and were giving you odd looks. “Trust me, I went for a massage before my final and I was so relaxed. It helped me to focus too.”

“Jeno,” you uttered his name with barely contained impatience. “I don’t have time. I need to cover a lot of shit before I go and sit in the fucking examination hall.”

“And I said I’ll help!” he repeated, sounding almost exasperated. Pushing the shopping cart forward again, he studied the shelves and continued, “You always do this, Y/N. You freak out before a test and act like the world is ending only for you to do super well.”

“Well—” you began, stumbling after him— “that’s just my coping mechanism! The more worried I am, the better I do. But I’m screwed for real this time!”

“No,” Jeno popped, placing a 2-litre bottle of Sprite in the cart. “I’m not listening to you this time. Especially not after you stayed awake for three days straight for your midterm.”

You sighed again. There was no arguing with your best friend. “How long is this massage of yours going to take?”

“We’ll be back at your place in two hours max,” he reassured you, patting your head. You swatted his hand away and gave him a dirty look. “I think we have everything we need to make it through today and tomorrow.”

“Why do we need such a big bottle of Sprite?”

“Party at my place this weekend. There’s a discount so I’m buying in advance.”

You frowned. “Shouldn’t you be stocking up on booze?”

“The guys said I have an alcohol addiction,” Jeno said, getting in line at the billing counter. “Which is, like, totally untrue but you know I never back down from a challenge. I’m going to prove them wrong by staying sober for two weeks.”

“Sure,” you snorted. “You’ll just find lame loopholes or cheat when no one’s looking.”

A sly grin took form on Jeno’s lips. He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively and drawled, “I know what you do when no one’s looking.”

“Really?” You feigned a gasp. “You know I sneak over to your house and steal your food when you’re not there?”

His smile dropped immediately. “Wait, what? That’s you? Not Hyuck?”

“The food thief is me but the one stealing your sheet masks is Hyuck,” you admitted.

“He steals my masks?! The ones I buy are expensive as fuck!” Jeno exclaimed, betrayal seeping into his features. His hands fell to his side and his eyes turned distant. “I can’t believe he’s been gaslighting me into thinking I do an extra round of skincare when I’m drunk.”

You giggled and pushed the shopping cart forward once the person in front of you was done. Placing the contents on the billing counter for the cashier to scan, you revealed, “Hyuck saw me raiding your pantry when you were at the gym. He used that as leverage against me for weeks before I saw him stealing your sheet masks and was able to finally strike a deal—he turns a blind eye to my robberies and I turn a blind eye to his.”

“Why’d you team up with him?” Jeno pouted. “I thought we were best friends.”

You laughed incredulously. “Seriously? That’s what you’re focusing on? Not the part where Hyuck and I used your stuff without asking?”

“Well, yeah, I’m pissed you used my shit. But I guess I’m just a little more bothered that you guys teamed up,” Jeno said and shrugged, fetching his wallet from the back pocket of his jeans. “Because, you know, coming together to make people suffer has always been our thing.”

You raised an eyebrow, slightly amused by how he was beating around the bush. “Are you saying you wanna team up with me to get back at Hyuck?”

Jeno grinned. “I’m gonna screw over that motherfucker so bad. You get off the hook, though, because you’re cute and I need your help.”

“You’re impossible.” You huffed and shook your head. Taking the bag of groceries, you said to him, “Text me my share and I’ll Venmo the money to you.”

“You could buy me an ice cream instead.”

“No,” you denied immediately. “We’re not wasting time on ice cream. Massage and then straight home so I can pick up my study material and we can leave for the library.”

Thankfully, Jeno didn’t protest. He drove you to your apartment complex and waited for you while you packed your bag. Then, the two of you were off to the massage place.

An hour later, you were done and forced to admit that the massage had indeed helped you. It felt like all the stress had left your body. Thinking about the final didn’t make you want to cry anymore and things were actually looking up now that you were rested.

You were able to retain the knowledge better and it was easier to understand the concepts. Jeno quizzed you and provided you with an endless supply of coffee throughout the night.

Right before lunch the next day, however, the panic resurfaced as you were revising your syllabus for the last time before your final at 3. You couldn’t seem to remember anything you had studied the previous night.

You could feel another breakdown coming, but before you could hyperventilate, Jeno scooped you up in his arms.

You hadn’t even realised when he’d come back from picking up your food. One minute, you were trying to control your breath and the next, your face was buried in his hard chest.

You held onto his shirt as his hands rubbed soothing circles on your back and he rocked you from side to side.

“Shh, don’t cry,” he mumbled and kissed the top of your head. “You’re gonna ace the final like you always do. You were able to answer all the quiz questions, so keep in mind that you are prepared. The pre-exam anxiety is just clouding your thoughts. Everything’s gonna come back to you when you sit down to write, alright?”

Nodding, you clenched your eyes shut and bit down on your lip to keep a sob from escaping. Jeno’s presence kept acting like a tether for you. It always had.

Maybe he was right about the final. Maybe he wasn’t. But at that moment, engulfed in his warm, safe embrace, it felt like everything was going to be okay.

𝐃𝐎𝐖𝐍𝐒𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐒 !

01. having to deal with a narcissistic asshole.

It was an especially sweltering day.

You were being baked inside-out despite wearing a tank top and a pair of shorts, your hair tied in a messy high bun. Adding to your torment was your broken A/C. You’d requested your landlord to fix it several times but your efforts were to no avail.

You would have kept bothering him incessantly and gotten the job done if you weren’t so intimidated by him already.

Sighing, you eyed your bathroom. A cold shower sounded like an amazing idea. Jeno wasn’t supposed to come over to watch the movie for a while anyway.

Deciding to cool yourself and get rid of the sweat sticking to your body, you entered the tiny bathroom. A high-pitched squeal left your mouth the moment you turned the shower knob and the cold water hit your skin.

“Fuck,” you cursed and flinched, turning the knob the other way immediately. Your shitty apartment didn’t even have a valve to adjust the temperature—the water was either mildly hot or ice cold. Showering in summer was always a big problem.

“God, I don’t wanna keep doing this,” you mumbled to yourself and stepped into your room again.

There was this… thing you’d been doing ever since you moved into this apartment. Whenever it was hot, you’d work out so you’d get more sweaty. That way, when you showered under the ice-cold water, it didn’t feel as unbearable.

It was weird and there probably was no science behind it, but you didn’t care as long as it worked.

So, you rolled out your yoga mat on the floor and began warming up.

Within no time, your skin was glistening with sweat and your hair was damp. You were struggling to complete the last push-up of your final set when someone knocked on your door, causing you to lose your focus. Your arms gave out beneath you, and you collapsed to the ground.

“Woah, it’s boiling in here,” Jeno pointed out intelligently. “And you look like you’re one move away from dying. God, I can’t even breathe Why the fuck are you working out with the windows closed? Are you stupid?”

Groaning, you rolled on your back and watched your best friend as he moved to the windows and threw them open. “Hey!” you protested weakly and raised a trembling arm in a pathetic attempt to stop him. “I’m trying to do something!”

Jeno raised an eyebrow at you and grabbed your hand, hauling you up effortlessly. “Oh, yeah? Pray tell.”

You crashed into his chest and rebounded, but he tightened his hold on you. His palm hovered over your back in case you lost your balance. Steadying yourself, you glared at him and snapped, “No. You’re gonna make fun of me.”

“I won’t!” Jeno laughed, his eyes crinkling.

“Stop, you’re doing it already!”

“Okay! Okay, I’m sorry. I really do wanna know what you were doing.”

You eyed him for a moment, waiting for him to slip up and start laughing again. But Jeno’s face remained mildly curious. Satisfied, you explained, “Well, because I was feeling hot, I decided to take a shower. The water here is very cold, though, so I decided to work out in a closed room because that would make me even hotter. If I get in the shower now, it wouldn’t feel as cold because my body temperature has already increased, and the water would be sort of neutralised.”

A beat of silence passed. And then, “I know I said I wouldn’t make fun of you—”

“Then stop talking.”

“But did you not realise you could have mixed the hot and cold water in a bucket?” Jeno continued, clearly still talking. “Or, I don’t know, come over to my place to shower?”

“You live with three other men.” You deadpanned. “I was not going to shower in your apartment with Jaemin, Renjun and Hyuck there. Also, I don’t have a big enough bucket, so I will be buying one today,” you added, muttering the last bit.

Jeno rolled his eyes. “God, Y/N, I would have kicked the guys out.”

“What makes you think they would have listened to you?” you asked amusedly.

“Okay, true,” he agreed. “They would have listened to you, though. If there’s anyone who’s bossy enough to get them out of the house on a hot Sunday afternoon, it’s you.”

“Are you calling me bossy?”

“Are you going to shower now?” he deflected. “You stink.”

“Shut up!” you exclaimed and slapped his shoulder hard, but laughed nonetheless. Moving away from him, you kicked him off your yoga mat and said, “You opened the windows and interrupted my workout, so I don’t feel as hot anymore. I think I’m gonna exercise a little more so I don’t die of hypothermia in the shower. You can take my laptop and choose a movie till then if you want.”

“How about I work out with you?” Jeno suggested. “We can have our gym bros moment.”

“I don’t wanna have a gym bros moment with you.”

“Why?” he whined.

Flicking his forehead, you said, “Because I know you’re gonna turn this into a competition, and I’m not in the mood.”

“Scared?”

“You wish,” you scoffed. “I’m tired from all the working out I did before you came, and I’m not going against you when you have that advantage over me.”

“That still means you’re scared. Pussy.”

Letting out an exasperated sigh, you got into the position for a plank. “Get out if you’re going to keep being annoying and not contribute shit to our gym bros moment.”

“I knew you’d come around,” Jeno replied smugly. You practically heard the grin in his voice when he said that.

You closed your eyes and laboured your breathing as you felt your abdomen begin to burn almost immediately. “Had to, or I knew you’d keep irritating me.”

Opening your lids, you turned your neck to see if he was doing the exercise with you.

Your arms gave out the moment you saw Jeno shirtless, his bulging biceps on full display.

“Damn, you lost quicker than I thought,” he commented.

“Why are you naked?!” you demanded in a shrill voice.

Still in position, Jeno only glanced at you like you were out of your mind. “I was wearing a hoodie, Y/N. Did you expect me to do a plank in that furnace?”

“Yeah!” you exclaimed. To your dismay, your eyes kept drifting to his well-defined muscles no matter how much you tried to focus on his face.

To make things worse, Jeno noticed. And smirked. “Stop complaining if you’re enjoying the view so much. It’s okay to admit you have a hot best friend.”

Flustered, you scrambled to your feet and looked at the ceiling. God, you felt like a stupid middle schooler. It was insane how much of an effect Jeno was having on you. What was weirder was that your mind was drifting to places it had never been before. At least where your best friend was concerned.

“Narcissus has nothing on you,” you muttered under your breath, and tried to gather your bearings.

“Besides,” Jeno continued, having not heard you. “I do send you pictures sometimes. I don’t know why you’re acting like you’ve never seen me like this.”

“Your phone’s camera is fucked, Jeno,” you grumbled. “The photos you texted me didn’t capture half of what’s actually there.”

No matter what you hadn’t seen, you’d felt whenever you hugged each other. It didn’t take away your surprise upon seeing the 2440p quality visual though.

“Is that disappointment I hear?” he taunted.

“No!” you exclaimed and finally looked at him again. At the sight of his working muscles, you muttered, “Can we stop now? You won.”

“Ah!” Jeno dragged the word as if he had just stumbled upon a revelation. “You want me to stand up so you can get a better view of my abs? Got it.”

Your eyes widened, and before you could deny his ridiculous accusations, he was towering over you. Wiggling his eyebrows, he gestured towards himself and flexed dramatically.

“You’re an idiot,” you huffed, unable to help yourself.

“Yeah? Then I guess an idiot just managed to fluster the shit out of you.” Jeno smiled and ruffled your hair. Bending, he picked up his discarded hoodie and shrugged it back on. “I’ll go and get you a bathing bucket from the supermarket around the corner. Don’t freeze yourself to death.”

You rolled your eyes. “I won’t.”

“Also, do you remember the shirt I forgot here all those months ago after I got wet in the rain? Can you find it so I can change into it when I’m back?” He frowned and looked at himself. “I’ll eventually toast myself if I watch the movie in my hoodie.”

“Sure, but you’re stupid for wearing warm clothes in summer,” you commented.

Jeno gave you a dirty look. “Sorry for assuming your A/C was in working condition. Besides, you always want to cuddle when we watch movies, so I figured you’d be more comfortable if I was wearing a hoodie.”

Your cheeks warmed at that, your heart stumbling a beat. What was wrong with you? You’d always known Jeno was caring and went out of his way to do nice things for you.

Typically, you’d have felt grateful for how thoughtful he was being.

Now, though, you felt that and… something else that you didn’t really want to acknowledge.

“Whatever,” you said instead, trying to sound dismissive. Pushing him out of your room, you continued, “I’ll find it. Just hurry up with the bucket.”

A few minutes after Jeno was gone, a notification popped up on your phone.

[jeno]: clearer picture that i clicked on jaemin’s phone for your viewing pleasure :”)

You blinked in confusion and opened the photo that was attached below, your eyes widening the moment you saw it. It was a zoomed-in gym mirror selfie of Jeno wearing nothing but sweatpants and shoes, his muscular abdomen on full display.

[you]: did you crop jaemin?

[jeno]: ???? [jeno]: wdym……. [you]: the photo’s dimensions are weird [jeno]: oh [jeno]: what the fuck [you]: LMFAOOO [jeno]: STOP I DIDN’T WANT YOU LOOKING AT HIM INSTEAD OF ME I’VE GOT A BETTER BODY ANYWAY AND I’M GONNA BUY A NEW PHONE SO I CAN SEND YOU CLEARER PICS WITHOUT HAVING TO CROP THAT FUCKER OUT

You bit down on your lip to keep yourself from smiling too wide. Right before you were about to type a reply, you received another text from your best friend.

[jeno]: so are you gonna tell me what you think [you]: FINE you’re hot. [you]: happy? [jeno]: euphoric

Finally laughing out loud, you shook your head.

Narcissus had nothing on Jeno indeed.

02. female friends ask you to be their wingwoman

You didn’t think you’d ever accompanied Jeno to a party without having someone ask you to set them up with him.

“Please,” Yoo Jimin begged for what seemed like the thousandth time. “Yeji said he was single!”

Sighing, you mentally cursed Yeji for inviting Jimin to Jeno’s party. “He is, but I’m not setting you up with him.”

“Why?” Jimin demanded rather aggressively, making you wonder what it would take for her to quit nagging you. “Do you like him or something?”

It took a concerning amount of effort for you to refrain from rolling your eyes. “I do not.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

“I don’t know, Jimin!” you finally burst and gestured at your surroundings. “Maybe I’m not too keen on helping you out because you followed me into the washroom and cornered me! Maybe I feel used because you’ve never shown much interest in me even though I’ve tried striking up a conversation with you several times before!”

Jimin’s features softened, and she looked away. “You’re right,” she muttered, guilt and shame evident in her voice. “I’m sorry for jumping on you like that.”

You immediately felt bad for snapping at her. Pursing your lips, you tried to cheer her up. “Don’t worry about it. You don’t need me to set you up with him anyway. I know we haven’t hung out much, but based on what I’ve heard about you from Yeji, you’re smart, funny and social. You have no reason to be nervous while approaching Jeno.”

For some reason, you regretted encouraging Jimin to pursue your best friend. A gaping hole formed in your heart, and you wished she would go for someone else instead.

“Thanks, Y/N.” Jimin smiled gratefully. “I know I’ve been a shitty person, but could you give me another chance? I’d really like to get to know you more.”

And just like that, the hollowness in your chest was gone. You gave her a genuine smile of your own and said, “I gotta pee right now, but does lunch tomorrow work for you?”

Jimin’s eyes widened. “Shit, I’m so sorry. I forgot where we were.” Rubbing the nape of her neck sheepishly, she replied, “Lunch works. I’ll text you tonight so we can talk about it.”

The two of you exchanged your goodbyes, and then she was gone. A few minutes later, you exited the washroom as well and headed back to the party.

“I missed you,” a voice slurred in your ear. Arms circled around your waist, and a face buried itself into the crook of your neck.

You laughed. “You failed the challenge, Jeno.”

“Where were you?” he demanded in an almost whiny tone. “It’s your fault! I wouldn’t have lost at beer pong if you’d been playing with me.”

Patting Jeno’s back in consolation, you replied, “I’m sorry you have zero self-control and commit to things you know you won’t be able to do.”

Jeno peeled himself away from you and pouted. “You’re mean.”

“Thanks. Let’s get wasted together,” you said, but then added upon looking at his already tipsy condition, “Or I can get wasted, and your ass can keep me company.”

“Don’t you think one of us should be sober?” Jeno asked as you pulled him along.

“I’m not gonna hold back from drinking!” you exclaimed. “Let me remind you that you were supposed to be the sober one today and make sure I didn’t do anything stupid. I’m blaming you if I get naked in the yard.”

Thanks to the music that was gradually getting louder as you approached the main party area, you didn’t hear your best friend’s response. You tightened your grip on his hand when the crowd thickened. Wading your way through the dancing throng, you finally reached the table lined with alcohol and food.

You chose a bottle of Romanov and popped it open, drinking straight from it. You’d barely taken a few gulps when Jeno snatched it from you and put it to his own mouth.

Throwing him a dirty look, you picked up another bottle for yourself. “Do you wanna dance?”

“I wanna throw up.”

“Suit yourself.” You shrugged and aimed for the dance floor. A smile crept on your face upon seeing Jaemin; you were not in the mood to dance alone.

“Y/N!” he hollered when he noticed you. Stumbling towards you, he pulled you in a quick embrace. “I haven’t seen you in so long!”

“Finals!” you answered. Jaemin nodded in understanding and ran a hand through his hair, taking a swig from his beer. “Do you wanna dance?”

You grinned. “You know I do.”

The next few hours were a complete blur. The bottle in your hand was replaced by more one after the other, and when Jaemin deemed you’d had enough to drink, he gave you a red solo cup filled with water instead.

It felt good to finally unwind after the horrible few weeks you’d had. There was no academic stress weighing down on you anymore, and though you were low on sleep, you didn’t want to stop partying.

You just wished you and Jeno had gotten wasted together. While you were having fun with Jaemin, partying with Jeno was a different experience entirely.

Right as you were about to take a sip from your cup, you felt an arm being thrown around your neck. The touch was so familiar that you recognised who it was immediately.

“I missed you!” you exclaimed. Jeno looked down at you with a grin on his face, a pair of black party glasses sitting on his nose. His hair was damp and fell over his forehead. Maybe it was the liquor in your system, but you could have sworn he never looked better. “Let’s dance.”

“Dance?” Jeno laughed. “Haven’t you been doing that for the past two hours? Don’t your feet hurt?”

Frowning, you glanced at your legs. “They do!” you exclaimed, and looked back at him again, your bottom lip sticking out in a pout. Feeling tears beginning to pool in your eyes, you mumbled, “But I still want to dance.”

“How about we go on the roof instead? The stars look pretty tonight,” your best friend suggested, trying his best not to laugh at you. “I didn’t drink at all after you left me. I’m sober enough to take care of you now.”

Your eyes lit up at that. “Wow, that’s such a good idea! You’re so smart, Jeno. I love you.”

Jeno’s lips finally twitched up in a smile. “I love you too, silly.”

Plucking the solo cup out of your hand, he offered you an arm. You looped yours through it with a soft thank you and leaned on him as he led you upstairs.

The two of you entered his dark room, and Jeno shut the door behind him. Only when the loud music was muffled did you realise your head was throbbing.

He unhooked your arms gently and grabbed a warm blanket off his bed. Throwing open his window, he jumped out on the flat roof and looked at you expectantly.

You staggered behind Jeno and took the hand he was holding out for you. His other hand hovered over your waist as you climbed on the sill.

Thanks to the alcohol in your system, your balance was non-existent, and your legs turned to jelly the moment they made contact with the roof. Fortunately, your best friend was there to catch you.

You bumped into Jeno’s chest instead of falling to the ground. He wrapped his arms around you and steadied you, laughing a little at your antics.

“God, how much did you drink?” you heard him wonder to himself. You mumbled an incoherent response and leaned against the outside wall of his room, watching him lay the spread on the floor.

The two of you usually climbed the ladder that led to the slanting roof at the very top of the house, but you reckoned the boy in front of you didn’t want to risk taking you up there when you were so wasted.

Jeno sat down on the blanket once he was done and peeked at you over his shoulder, patting the space beside him. “Come on.”

Pushing yourself off the siding, you stumbled to him, tripping over your feet a bit. You were able to keep your balance, though, and a moment later, you found yourself lying on the blanket next to him.

Your shoulders brushed against each other, the warmth from his body seeping into you. It was summer, but the night air was still chilly, especially now that you were on the roof. You were thankful for the protection Jeno offered against the mild cold.

The music was blaring once again now that you were outside, and there were no barriers to deafen it, but the volume barely bothered you. Your eyes were on the stars, trying to identify the constellations.

“I see Orion right there,” Jeno said, pointing at the sky. You followed his finger, and sure enough, there it was. “And there’s Ursa Minor.” He moved his hand after noting that you had recognised Orion.

“I don’t see it,” you muttered, blinking heavily to clear your sight.

“Can you see Polaris?” he asked, glancing at you for a moment.

You raised your hand and pointed it at a random star that was nowhere near the one Jeno was referring to. “There.”

Jeno snorted. “You could spot Orion, but you can’t identify the brightest star in the sky?” Without waiting for a response, your best friend grabbed your arm and directed it to the right star. “That is Polaris.”

“Woah.” You gaped and lowered your arm. “It’s so shiny.”

Jeno laughed again upon hearing the child-like wonder in your voice. You stargazed often and always challenged each other to see who could identify the most constellations in a minute. He knew the night sky was familiar to you, but seeing you like this reminded Jeno of the first time he brought you to his roof and introduced you to his favourite hobby.

“Do you want it?” he teased.

Eyes widening, you turned your neck to look at him, your faces so close you could count his lashes. “Really?”

“Really,” he said and pinched your cheek, unable to help himself. “I’ll get it for you.”

A wide smile immediately broke across your lips, and you threw your arms around him, hugging him tightly. “Thank you!” you squealed.

Jeno chuckled, a little surprised that you had practically climbed on top of him, and part of him was caged under you now. He didn’t mind the sudden intimacy. It had always been his love language; any sort of physical contact with you—be it comparing hand sizes or carrying you on his back—warmed his heart.

Patting your head, he asked, “You want me to show you the rest of Ursa Minor?”

“Yes.” You nodded into the crook of his neck and peeled yourself away from him, but your head still rested where his shoulder met his arm.

Brushing away a strand of hair that had fallen on your face, he averted his gaze to the sky. “Polaris is the tail of The Little Dipper. Now we move towards the left. See the star that’s above the brightest? That’s Delta. Epsilon is above Delta too, but the distance between them is not as much as the distance between the first two. Zeta is below—”

You tuned Jeno out. He was still showing you the stars that made up the constellations, far too invested to notice that you were no longer paying attention to what he was saying and were looking at something much more beautiful instead.

You’d always known your best friend was attractive. You’d have to be blind to not notice his striking features—they were sharp with a certain softness around the edges. His face always stood out in crowds and demanded people’s undivided attention.

Rightfully so, you thought to yourself as you admired his perfectly straight nose and the shape of his soft lips, diverting your gaze to his eyes. You’d always thought they were his best features. They were warm and open and felt like home. It deserves to be appreciated.

“Pherka, Eta, Kochab and Zeta form a—”

“You’re prettier.”

Jeno glanced at you, your faces mere inches away and those beautiful eyes peering into yours with slight confusion. “What?”

“You said the stars looked pretty tonight,” you whispered. “I think you’re prettier.” You paused for a moment, as if rethinking your words. Then, “I think you’re the prettiest person in the world.”

A fond smile crept on your best friend’s face, and maybe it was because your ear was in the vicinity of his heart, but you could have sworn you heard it thumping loudly against his ribcage. Lightly bumping his forehead against yours, Jeno whispered back,

“I think you’re the prettiest person in the world too.”

03. it’s very easy to fall for them, especially when they’re always so sweet and caring

The first thing you felt upon regaining your consciousness was pain.

Your skull was splitting apart, the little bit of sunlight creeping in through the closed curtains rendering you blind. Nausea was beginning to set in, but your body was so weak that you weren’t sure you could make it to the toilet in time.

You should have never drunk so much. Not only had you not taken any proper rest after working yourself to exhaustion during your finals, but had also danced to the point you couldn’t move your legs. Heck, you couldn’t even remember much of the party. You recalled leaving Jeno behind to party with Jaemin, but everything after that was a huge blank slate.

The toilet was far away, but you could try reaching the dustbin near the study table instead of just throwing up on the carpet. Groaning, you tried to push yourself up. When that didn’t work, you put all strength in your abdomen and threw yourself off the bed.

A shockwave of agony passing through your body rendered you immobile on the ground. You moaned in pain and curled in on yourself, covering your mouth with a hand upon tasting bile on your tongue.

The door was thrown open, and a worried Jeno gaped at you lying on his room’s hard floor motionlessly. “What the fuck?”

“Dustbin,” you croaked with much difficulty, tears springing to your eyes. They hurt so much you wanted to rip them out.

Your best friend moved into action immediately. “I kept the dustbin right beside the bed in case you got sick, you blind twat truck. Along with painkillers and water on the table.”

You found it in yourself to glare at the boy, but he ignored you. Placing the waste basket in front of you, he helped you up. You gripped the rim as he gathered your hair in his hand and held it up to avoid it getting in the way of your vomit.

Right before you emptied the toxins in your body, you managed to say to him, “How capable do I look to you right now, you stupid toe-licking grinch man?”

Jeno rolled his eyes and rubbed your back with his other hand, patiently waiting for you to finish. Once your heaving stopped, you took the tissue he was holding out for you and wiped your mouth. You felt much better after throwing up but you were still so tired.

“Come on.”

You swatted Jeno’s hand away and rested your back on his bed, tucking your legs under your chin. “Too much effort,” you muttered and closed your eyes, willing the headache to go away.

“I was going to carry you to the bed, Y/N,” he said in exasperation.

“I just need a moment,” you whispered almost incoherently, wishing he would stop asking you questions when you had no energy to answer. “A moment and an Aspirin.”

There was some shuffling, and then you felt a hand brushing your matted hair out of your face. “Here.”

You peeled your lids open to see Jeno crouched in front of you with water and the painkiller you had asked for. Taking it from his hand, you popped it into your mouth and gulped down some water.

For a few moments, you tried to regulate your breathing and calm yourself down. Jeno could tell you were gathering the willpower and strength to climb back on his bed. He wanted to help, but you clearly didn’t want it. So, he just watched you silently struggle.

He should have been with you last night; he hated that he wasn’t when he had promised to be the sober half. As far as Jeno was concerned, Jaemin was going to get an earful about keeping tabs on how much his friends drank. Never in the two years of friendship had he seen you with such a huge hangover.

“Fuck,” he heard you curse under your breath. You moaned in pain as you pushed yourself up on trembling arms and fell on his mattress. Sighing, Jeno tucked you in and pressed a chaste kiss on your forehead.

“Sleep well,” he said and made his way to the door. “I’ll wake you up for lunch. Renjun is making grilled sandwiches.”

Your eyes flew open again. Fuck. You were supposed to meet Jimin.

“Jeno, wait,” you blurted, and he stopped in his tracks. “I was supposed to meet a friend for lunch, but I don’t think I can make it. Can you cover for me?”

Your best friend leaned against the doorframe and crossed his arms over his chest. “Which friend?”

“Jimin.”

“I thought she ghosted you.” He frowned. “Now you’re meeting her for lunch?”

“No, you are meeting her for lunch. I don’t wanna be rude and cancel at the last minute. What if she already left?”

“It’s 10 in the morning.”

“Well, what if she turned down other offers because of the plans we made?”

“She left an hour ago with Mark after passing out on the couch in Hyuck’s room last night. I doubt she’s had the time to turn down any other offers. Actually, I think she’ll be glad you cancelled. She looked pretty hungover when she left.”

“Why are you being so difficult?” you whined, wincing when the throbbing in your head responded to the sudden increase in the volume of your voice. “I’m only asking you for a small favour.”

“I’m not being difficult,” Jeno defended himself and took a few steps towards you. “I’m trying to tell you that you may be overthinking this. Let me send her a text from your phone asking for a reschedule, and we can have some homemade lunch with the guys.”

Sighing heavily, you averted your gaze from his and stared at the ceiling. “I just don’t wanna blow this. I think she’s really cool and I’d like to get to know her more. I’m good friends with everyone in our social circle except her. It’s awkward.”

Jeno’s eyes softened at that. “Y/N, you’re not blowing anything. Rescheduling lunch because you both partied till you collapsed is not going to take away any points. Trust me.”

Your best friend was right. You were overthinking this, but you didn’t exactly blame yourself. All your efforts to befriend Jimin had been futile till now. You didn’t want to do anything that could mess up the friendship that had begun to bloom last night.

“Fine,” you finally relented. “Shoot her a text from my phone. I think it’s in my clothes bag—” you paused, your eyes widening. Lifting Jeno’s duvet in panic, you looked down at yourself. “Who changed my clothes?”

“Ningning did!” Jeno answered quickly, the tips of his ears turning a bright red. He couldn’t understand why he was freaking out—nothing happened.

You exhaled in relief, trying to get rid of the alien tingling feeling spreading throughout your body. Your cheeks were hot with embarrassment. “Okay. Well, my phone’s in my clothes bag.”

Jeno busied himself, rummaging through your backpack that was on his bedside table. What you didn’t know, however, was that it was just a front for him to calm himself down. “Got it.” He waved the phone at you. “What’s your pin?”

“Your birthday.”

His eyebrows disappeared into his hairline, and a seed of warmth sprouted in his chest. A dizzying sense of affection for you washed over him, drenching him in happiness from head to toe. “Really?”

You nodded and closed your eyes. Turning on your side to get into a more comfortable sleeping position, you buried yourself deeper under his sheets. Yawning, you mumbled, “Day-Month-Year with leading zeros.”

“My password is your birthday too,” he said quietly after sending Jimin the text. “A lot of them are. It’s the easiest set of numbers to remember.”

You didn’t respond. Jeno didn’t mind. He knew you’d already fallen asleep. Keeping your phone on the table, he smiled sadly and stared at your resting figure in longing. “Everything about you is so easy to remember.”

Jeno closed the door behind him as he left, none the wiser about the fact that you were still awake and had heard everything he’d said, your heart beating so fast that you thought it was going to leap out of your chest.

Your best friend left, completely unaware of the fact that you were now entertaining the possibility of being in love with him.

𝐒𝐈𝐃𝐄 𝐄𝐅𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐒 !

01. the green-eyed monster you resent makes an appearance more than you’d like

You genuinely couldn’t believe your friend group and their seemingly never-ending social battery.

One would think that after a long night of partying, a person would stay at home the next day and take some much-needed rest. Your friends, however, thought it was a good idea to meet up for dinner and decide what to do over the weekend.

You didn’t bother to remind them of the wonderful invention that was group chats.

“We should drive up to the beach,” Mark suggested, flipping through the menu. “Summer just started, so I don’t think there will be a lot of people.”

All of you were seated in a round booth at the back of a diner Chenle said he frequented. You weren’t going to lie; you could see why. The setting was very homey, and the cushioning of the sofa was very cosy—you were almost sure you were going to fall asleep even before your food arrived.

Ningning, who was sitting beside Mark, peeked over his shoulder to see what was listed. Minjeong said, “That’s stupid. The start of summer is exactly when beaches get overcrowded. Most don’t get to visit the ocean during the year, so they make a beeline for the beach as soon as break begins.”

“True,” you heard Jeno say. He leaned back in his seat and put his arm on the cushion behind you. You resisted the urge to lean in. Taking a sip of his water, he continued, “Besides, we’re already going to Jeju Island for a week next month. I don’t think we should drive three hours to go to the beach right now.”

“What about karaoke?” Jimin piped up. She was sitting on the other side of Minjeong, opposite from Chenle, who was on the other side of the table.

“We don’t need an entire weekend for just karaoke,” Chenle pointed out. “We could do it whenever we want.”

“Well, what about—”

“Hey, can I take your order?” a female voice that was a combination of annoyed, upbeat, friendly and polite interrupted Minjeong. The girl looked a little flustered at being cut off, but she cleared her throat and mumbled a small yeah, just give us a minute.

The waitress did not move, so all of you awkwardly picked up the menu cards and began flipping through them.

“The usual for me, Yuna,” Chenle said, smiling up at her. To diffuse the sudden tension created in the air, he began making small talk with her as she waited.

“What are you eating?” Jeno asked. He was closer to you now, his eyes scanning the contents of the menu card in your hand over your shoulder.

You shrugged. “I don’t think I’m eating anything. I’m not very hungry.”

Jeno’s eyebrows creased, and he glanced at your face in worry. “You haven’t had anything since lunch. At least drink something.”

“It’s fine.” You dismissed him with a wave of your hand and pushed the card in his direction so he could order whatever he wanted. “I won’t be able to finish anything by myself and I don’t wanna waste food.”

“How about we share?” he insisted. “You eat however much you want, and I’ll finish the rest. Don’t go to sleep on an empty stomach.”

An internal battle began. While Jeno’s suggestion was sensible, you knew he didn’t like to share his food with anyone. You remembered a time when he had refused to go on a second date with a girl because she kept nibbling on his meal. You didn’t want him to do something he hated just for your sake.

“Really, it’s fine,” you repeated. “You go ahead and—”

“Hey, Y/N,” Yeji called, making you divert your attention to her. “You wanna share a triple-decker chicken sandwich? Chenle said this place is famous all over town for that dish.”

You had to admit, a triple-decker chicken sandwich did sound tasty. But you’d just turned down Jeno, so you didn’t wanna say yes to Yeji. Shaking your head, you once again said, “I’m not hungry.”

“Why aren’t you hungry?” Mark frowned, overhearing your conversation. The rest of your friend group looked at you in concern. Ningning asked, “Are you okay?”

You groaned. The last thing you wanted to do was explain to everyone why you didn’t have an appetite. “I’m okay. I’m just not hungry because I had a lot for lunch.”

“That’s a lie,” Jeno commented unhelpfully, and you smacked his shoulder hard in retaliation. He winced, rubbing the area of attack. “Hey!”

“Shut up!” you exclaimed. Taking a deep breath, you said to everyone with as little annoyance in your voice as you could, “Please just order what you want. I still feel a little weird after last night’s party, and I don’t think I can stomach anything right now.” Before anyone could reply, you added, “I’m going to the restroom. Be right back.”

Yeji looked a little stunned, but she got up from her seat and let you leave the booth when you requested her to move. Locking yourself in one of the stalls, you clutched your stomach and curled in on yourself, closing your eyes.

Your period cramps were especially painful this time. Maybe it was because of last night’s exertion, but your cycle was early too. Your stomach was in too many knots for you to even think about eating anything.

The washroom’s door opened, and you heard soft footsteps trudging towards you. Knocking on the only occupied stall’s door, a female voice asked, “Is everything okay, Y/N?”

“Yeah,” you croaked, feeling tears burning your eyes. “Everything’s fine, Jimin. I just have period cramps, that’s all.”

“Oh.” There was silence for a moment. “I have painkillers. Do you want them?”

Exhaling through your mouth, you wiped your moist cheeks and stepped out of the stall. “Sure.”

Jimin smiled at you reassuringly and handed you a wet wipe, looping her arm through yours. “Don’t worry. I got you.”

Your heart swelled with happiness and gratitude. You’d wanted to connect with her for so long, and it finally felt like you were getting somewhere this time. Maybe you were being overemotional due to your fluctuating hormones, but you wanted to pull her into a hug.

“Oh, also,” you started a little sheepishly, “I wanted to apologise in person about cancelling on you earlier today. I drank and partied more than I should have. I thought about sending Jeno to cover for me, but he pointed out that it would have been awkward for you to see him when you were expecting me.”

“Woah, wait!” she gaped and took a step away from you. The shock on her face surprised you for a moment, but the feeling didn’t last long. “You’re kidding me! You should have kept insisting, Y/N! A lunch date would have been the perfect way for us to get closer!”

“I don’t think he would have considered the lunch a date because he was just a stand-in for me,” you said awkwardly, and threw the used wipe in the dustbin.

Jimin waved you away as you walked out of the restroom and back to your booth. “I mean, yeah, it wouldn’t have been an official date, but it would have given me the opportunity to ask him out on a real one.”

“Right.”

You hated the way you sounded. You hated the way your stomach churned, and your mood dropped. You hated that someone was pursuing Jeno. You hated that you were being forced to play Cupid, all thanks to your strong refusal to admit your feelings and the friendship you wanted to build with the girl next to you.

“Oh, my God!” Jimin exclaimed, too immersed in her own fantasies to have noticed the change in your tone and demeanour. “I can make up for the missed opportunity by sitting next to him right now! You wouldn’t mind, would you?”

You did mind. The idea of her making a move on your best friend made you want to dig a hole and cry. God, you were being so pathetic. This was completely unlike you, and you despised the way you were acting. You had to pull yourself together immediately.

Besides, it wasn’t like you were ever going to explore these newfound feelings you had for Jeno. The last thing you wanted to do was ruin your friendship. Forcing an encouraging smile on your face, you said, “Um, sure! That’s a really good idea.”

“Took you guys long enough,” Chenle commented once you returned.

You raised an eyebrow. “Did you have any other places to be?”

“I mean I was worried.” He rolled his eyes. “We ordered food while you were gone. You sure you don’t want anything, Y/N?”

“Yep,” you said, popping the last letter. “Scoot over and make space for us.”

Yeji got up again and stood to the side as Jimin, and you slid into the booth. “The two of you better not make me get up again. I’m not budging even if you need to take a big dump.”

“Sorry,” you muttered, smiling at her sheepishly. Making yourself comfortable, you grabbed your glass of water and dipped a straw in it, idly sipping the liquid.

Jeno’s gaze caught yours from behind Jimin’s back. He pointed at her with a frown on his face and mouthed, “Why is she sitting beside me?”

You waved him away and turned your attention to the rest of your friends. “Please tell me you guys finally decided what we’re doing over the weekend.”

“We did,” Mark piped up. “We’re thinking of going to an amusement park and then a water park.”

Jimin frowned. “Won’t those places be crowded as well?”

“We just need to accept that most destinations will be. Everyone’s on break, so it doesn’t matter where we go. There will be people everywhere.”

You agreed with Minjeong. “Amusement park it is. Can we hit the bars at night?”

“It won’t be much of a trip if we don’t.” Ningning grinned. “You sure you want to go clubbing so soon though? You were completely wasted when Jeno called me to his room and made me change your clothes last night.”

Mark snickered. “Are you scared of changing your own girlfriend’s clothes, Jeno?”

Silence. No one spoke.

NingNing was staring at Mark incredulously, and Yeji seemed to be suffering through an extreme case of second-hand embarrassment. Chenle pretended to flip through the menu while Minjeong grabbed her phone and scrolled through the apps on her home screen in an attempt to look busy.

Jimin whirled to face you so fast that you wondered how her neck hadn’t snapped. You couldn’t even dare to look at Jeno to see what reaction Mark’s words had evoked out of him.

Laughing awkwardly, you asked, “Who said we’re dating?”

“You’re kidding me, right?” Mark scoffed in disbelief. “You guys are so bad at keeping your relationship private. Everyone knows there’s something going on between the two of you.”

“Is that true?” Jeno asked, but no one present at the table dared to meet his gaze. “Do all of you think there’s something going on between Y/N and me?”

“I mean….” Chenle began, dragging the word out. “You both are very close. People who claim to be just friends don’t cross the boundaries you two step all over everyday. But we’ve never seen you kiss either, so we’re not sure if you’re dating secretly or…”

“You guys are crazy,” you interrupted. “Stop speculating about our relationship. It’s weird.” Turning to face a very betrayed-looking Jimin, you enunciated, “Jeno and I are just friends. That’s all there is to us.”

“Yeah,” Jeno added, glancing at you. “Y/N and I will only ever be friends. There’s no way I would date her. I don’t find her attractive in a romantic way.”

Feeling a knot form in your heart and anger bubble in the pit of your stomach, you snapped, “Same. Jeno’s not even my type. I wouldn’t get together with him if we were the only people left on Earth.”

Your friends exchanged knowing glances, and poor Jimin, who was stuck sitting between Jeno and you, made an attempt to diffuse the tension. “Okay, guys. We get it.”

“I’m not sure you do,” Jeno hissed, staring all your friends down. “I can see your damn faces. The only way you’re going to believe I’m not into Y/N is if I prove it to you by going out with someone else.”

Minjeong began, “That’s not—”

“No, he’s right,” you fumed. Under the table, your hand curled into a fist. “The only way you guys are going to get this stupid image of Jeno and me being together romantically is if we date other people.”

“The two of you are overreacting!” Yeji exclaimed. “There’s no need to get so defensive! We were wrong for assuming, and Mark was an idiot for opening his fat mouth. I’m sure you both would have told us if there was something. We’re all sorry.”

There was a chorus of agreement on the table. Everyone genuinely seemed to be apologetic—except Mark, who was glaring at Yeji and looked mad for being called an idiot. His eyes met yours, and a sheepish smile took form on his lips.

You huffed a small laugh and shook your head, but your heart was still in knots. There was a certain hollowness in the pit of your stomach. You felt sick and anxious.

Did Jeno really have to say all those hurtful things just to convince your friends about your platonic relationship? He didn’t need to sound so offended and make your mutual denial a competition.

Sure, you were the one who had declared there would never be anything more than just friendship between Jeno and you, but he didn’t have to cross the line by saying you weren’t appealing to him.

Besides, you’d said what you’d said for Jimin. You didn’t actually mean the words that left your mouth. Considering the emotions you’d been feeling recently, it would be a lie to claim you didn’t hope for a different sort of future with Jeno.

It didn’t matter anyway. A romantic relationship between the two of you wasn’t practical. Your best friend had never so much as hinted at wanting something more.

In a twisted way, you were glad he said those wounding things. You needed to be pulled back to reality.

“Hey, Jeno,” you heard Jimin say once the food arrived and everyone started eating. “I was wondering if you wanted to grab lunch and watch a movie sometime this week?”

Bile rose to your throat. You hoped to God he would say no. You didn’t care if you were being a shitty person; you didn’t think you could take any more of this torture.

“Are you asking me out on a date?”

Your eyes were trained on your glass of water, but you didn’t need to look at him to know he was surprised. As much as you hated eavesdroppers, you couldn’t stop yourself from wanting to learn where this conversation was going.

“I am.” Jimin chuckled nervously.

Jeno didn’t reply immediately. The rest of your friends were engaged in their own discussions with the people sitting next to them. The table wasn’t silent by any means, but the only things you could hear were Jimin waiting for his answer with bated breath and the pounding of your heart in your chest.

Then, “I would be honoured.”

Oh, you were most definitely going to throw up.

02. you fall for them

You hadn’t talked to Jeno ever since dinner with your group.

He hadn’t reached out to you, and you hadn’t tried to contact him either. You’d received a text from Jimin the next day about the specifics of her date with Jeno. They were supposed to meet up for lunch at a restaurant near your college campus and then go out to watch some sappy rom-com.

He didn’t even care for rom-coms. You’d begged him to watch one with you countless times and he’d always turned you down. Part of you wondered if he knew Jimin was updating you about everything and he was purposely pulling this shit to get back at you.

But you dismissed the notion immediately. No way were you so dense and self-centred. Maybe Jeno genuinely was into Jimin.

Your phone began ringing, and you rolled over on your bed, blindly searching for it on your bedside table. God, you hated being woken up in the middle of your afternoon naps. It almost always guaranteed a headache.

“Hello,” you said groggily, your throat raw and dry. “Who is this?”

“Oh! Did I wake you up?” It was Jimin. She sounded upbeat. Your heart sank. “I’m so sorry!”

Pushing yourself up, you rubbed the gunk out of your eyes and made your way to the window. The darkness made you bump into the corner of your study table, and you bit down on your lip to keep a yelp from escaping. Hobbling, you threw the curtains open and said, “No worries. My alarm was just about to ring. How was the date?”

Laughter bubbled from the other end of the phone line. “It was cool! He is a really good guy. No wonder everyone is head over heels for him. He opened the door for me, didn’t let me spend any money even though I asked him out, was an excellent listener, called me pretty and beautiful, and drove me back home. Oh, God, and the eye-contact? It made him a hundred times sexier.”

Seems legit, you thought to yourself. Jeno had always been a gentleman. The other girls you’d set him up with had pretty much given you the same feedback. Part of you felt relieved that this date hadn’t been any different than the others he’d been on.

Except the rom-com part, of course. For the life of you, you couldn’t figure out why he would agree to something he hated.

“Ah, I’m happy for you, Jimin!” you exclaimed, trying your best to mean what you said. Your own words tasted like ash on your tongue. “Are you guys going on a second date?”

“I’m not sure, to be honest. He said he had a great time with me, but when I tried to ask him out again, he just hugged me. That took me by surprise, and I kinda just forgot.” She laughed. “I know good dates usually end with a kiss, but the fact that he didn’t go for one didn’t bother me.”

“Oh,” you mumbled. Sitting on the ledge of your window, you asked, “That sounds nice. Do you think you’ll try asking him again?”

The last thing you expected her to say was no. And the way she said it… she didn’t sound sad or upset or disappointed. She sounded like herself. She sounded the way one would when they talked about the weather.

It confused you. Didn’t Jimin just say the date was really good? She sounded so happy and delighted. Why was she backing out now?

“I—I don’t get it,” you sputtered. “I thought you were into him. I thought you had a great time today. Why aren’t you going to ask him out again? Did something else happen—?”

“Calm down.” She chuckled. “Nothing happened.”

“Huh? Then what’s the problem?”

“Nothing happened,” she repeated. “That’s the problem. I like Jeno. He’s attractive, funny and caring. He’s everything a girl would want in a guy. But there was no spark between us. I had a great time with him, but hanging out today didn’t feel any different than usual. It felt like I was hanging out with a good friend, not with a potential romantic interest.

“I was looking forward to exploring what I felt for him. Turns out, it was just physical attraction. It also turns out that he wasn’t into me at all. If it wasn’t obvious the night we all went out for dinner, it was glaringly clear today. I think part of the reason he said yes was that he didn’t want to hurt my feelings,” she added. “The other—major—part was that he’s in love with someone else, and I would rather die than be a homewrecker.”

“Oh,” you said again. You didn’t know how to respond to that. What did she mean Jeno is in love with someone else? You didn’t dare focus on the last part of what she’d said. You didn’t dare hope that the person she was referring to was you. “Well, I’m sorry it didn’t work out between the two of you. I’m sure you’ll find someone else easily. You’re a delight. Anyone would be lucky to date you.”

Jimin laughed again. “If you weren’t in love with Jeno too, Y/N, I would have thought you were into me.”

It took a second for the words to register, but when they did, you felt your heart drop to your stomach. Forcing yourself to laugh, you croaked, “Whatever do you mean?”

Saying that was a mistake. You should not have asked her to elaborate. She was going to make you come to terms with your feelings, and all the time and effort you’d spent denying and trying to get rid of them was going to go down the drain.

Before she could speak, you made a static sound with your mouth. Then, you pretended that the connection was really bad. “Wha—hear—you. Try—back. Hell—?”

You hung up before Jimin could call you out on your bullshit. A moment later, you saw a text pop up.

[jimin]: that was soooo unsubtle [y/n]: idk what ur talking ab!!!!!!! [jimin]: sure [jimin]: also a tiny heads up [jimin]: i told jeno to stop being a pussy and an asshole so he’s on his way 2 ur place now [y/n]: WHAT THE FUCK [jimin]: i’m going 2 pretend u said thank u [jimin]: don’t forget ab our dinner date tmrw [jimin]: have fun <3

It was crazy how the bell rang almost immediately after you read the last text. You wondered if the timing was planned and that Jimin had told Jeno to wait till she gave him the go-ahead.

You trudged to the front door and took a deep breath before opening it.

“Hey,” Jeno mumbled with a small smile. His hair was ruffled, as if he had run his hands through it several times. “Can I come in?”

Biting the inside of your cheek, you nodded and moved out of the way to make space for him to step inside. He shoved his hands inside the pockets of his jeans and stood awkwardly.

“You can sit,” you said, feeling the corners of your lips curl up in amusement.

He sighed and wove his fingers through his strands again. “Not before I apologise for my behaviour. I was completely out of line that day,” he said. “I shouldn’t have said those things. I didn’t mean them.”

“So you don’t think I’m unattractive?”

You meant to tease him, but the next thing you knew, he was standing toe-to-toe with you, a desperate and guilt-ridden expression adorning his face. “God, no. You’re the most beautiful person I have ever seen. I only said that because… because I knew it would hurt you.”

Jeno was standing too close to you. You could barely breathe, much less think. But that didn’t stop you from asking, “Why would you want to hurt me?”

He didn’t answer for what felt like an entire minute. He only kept staring at you, an internal battle raging inside him. Then, he let loose a breath of frustration and moved away. He refused to look at you, and your patience kept slipping with each moment that passed.

Right when you thought it would snap, Jeno spoke up, “It hurt me when you said you and I would only ever be friends. I know how stupid it sounds, but it really did. For years, I’d been pining after you and hoping that maybe we could be something more in the future. I felt like an idiot when I realised wouldn’t ever view me in that light.

“You got so defensive when Chenle said all our friends were suspicious of us being in a secret relationship. I couldn’t help but wonder if you felt disgusted at the idea of us being together. I got angry at myself for being naive and said those horrible things without even realising.”

You didn’t know what to say. This was the second time you’d been rendered speechless in the past thirty minutes. It was one revelation after the other; you were having a hard time keeping up.

“You—you like me?” you stuttered.

Jeno laughed humourlessly and looked you dead in the eyes. “I love you, Y/N.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

You took a step back. “No, no, no, no—”

“Yes,” he pressed. “I’m sorry that I do. I know this changes everything, but I couldn’t keep it in anymore. I just—”

“Why would you go out with Jimin if you… if you love me?” you whispered.

“Partly to see your reaction and partly in an attempt to get over you,” he admitted. “It didn’t work. I just—I just couldn’t stop thinking about you the entire time I was with her. I felt so guilty for saying such terrible things because I couldn’t deal with my emotions and come to terms with reality. I’m really sorry, Y/N.”

You swallowed the lump in your throat. “I’m sorry too.”

“You don’t have to apologise for not loving me back—”

“That’s not what I’m apologising for,” you interrupted and walked towards him until your abdomens were touching. “I’m apologising for not seeing it sooner. I’m apologising for encouraging Jimin to ask you out even though it killed me. I’m apologising for denying my feelings time and time again. I’m apologising for saying we would only ever be friends. The last thing I want is for our relationship to be platonic.”

Jeno was barely breathing. “What are you saying?”

“I’m saying I love you too, Lee Jeno,” you mumbled and stood on your toes, cupping cheeks with your palms. “I’m saying I want you to kiss me.”

The words didn’t register immediately, but his lips were on yours the moment they did.

Jeno’s arm snaked around your waist, and he pulled you closer. His hand grabbed your neck from behind, and he tilted his neck to the side, deepening the kiss.

Your breath hitched in your throat. All you could feel was him. Your nerve-endings were short-circuiting, and pure adrenaline was coursing through your veins. You didn’t think you’d ever been as satisfied and euphoric as you were right now.

Jeno’s lips slotted with yours perfectly. You smiled to yourself upon realising he tasted like chocolates. Your best friend always ate a piece before any event he deemed to be very important. He claimed they gave him good luck.

Letting go of one of his cheeks, you grabbed the round collar of his shirt and pressed your mouth harder against his. The nights you’d spent wondering how kissing him would feel and then hating yourself immediately for having such thoughts amounted to this.

You didn’t want to hold back.

But you had to ask him a question. It didn’t matter how stupid or ridiculous it was; you wanted to know the answer. So, you broke the kiss and inquired with your body still tangled with his, “Why the hell did you agree to watch a rom-com with Jimin?”

“Really?” he asked exasperatedly. “You wanna talk about Jimin while we’re making out?”

“I wanna know why you watched a rom-com with her when I’ve been begging you to watch one with me for so long,” you corrected.

Jeno was silent for a moment, as if contemplating whether or not to tell you. You raised an eyebrow. “Well,” he started, blowing out a breath. “She told me you set her up with me, and it pissed me off even more. I knew she’d tell you all about our date, so I suggested we watch a rom-com. I knew you’d be riled up once you realised.”

You snorted. Who knew? You weren’t actually being a self-centred narcissist when you suspected the same. “You’re an idiot. I was already riled up you were going out with her.”

“Oh, yeah?” he teased. “Why’d you encourage her in the first place then?”

“Honestly, at first, I thought I could use you to further my friendship with her,” you admitted. Jeno scoffed in disbelief. “Yeah, I know. That was kinda shitty of me. But when I realised I was falling for you, I pushed her to pursue you in an attempt to convince myself I was not into you. That obviously backfired and did the very opposite. I was horribly miserable. I wanted to shoot myself everytime I heard her gush about you.”

He smirked. “She gushed about me?”

“Oh, get over yourself.” You shoved his shoulder playfully. “How’d you end up here after your date? Jimin texted me that you were coming.”

“Tough, but I’ll try.” He laughed. “She was probably able to tell how disinterested I was. After the date when I dropped her home and hugged her instead of kissing her, she just confronted me and asked if I was in love with you. Then told me to not bother answering because it was obvious. She said she didn’t want to get in the middle of us and threatened to kick my ass if I didn’t come here to make amends immediately.”

You grinned. “Oh, the things I would have done to witness that scene.”

“It was scary.” Jeno frowned. “She hit my shoulder really hard when I said I was in love with you and called me an idiot for going out with her. I think she was angry at herself too for being oblivious to our situationship. It was one of the weirdest dates I’ve ever been on.”

“Jimin actually said she had a great time with you. She told me it was nice.”

“Really?” he asked, sounding surprised.

You placed a chaste kiss on Jeno’s mouth. “Hmm, I wonder how good the best date you’ve ever been on would be then.”

He chased your lips and kissed you back deeply. Caressing your cheekbone with stars twinkling in his eyes, Jeno said, “I guess we’ll know when I take you out.”

“No way, are you officially asking me out on a date, Lee Jeno?” you asked, and let out a fake gasp.

“Damn right I am,” he declared. “I don’t want the amusement park trip with our friends to be our first day out as a couple. Do you wanna grab some food tomorrow afternoon? We can go to the trampoline park before that.”

You smiled softly. “That sounds wonderful. But,” you added. “No more flirting with restaurant staff for free food, or I’ll go ballistic on you.”

Jeno laughed, and you thought it was the most beuatiful sound you had ever heard. His chest rumbled with the force of it, his eyes creasing to look like small crescent moons. Slipping his hand into yours, he squeezed once.

“Wouldn’t even dream of it.”

note: THANK U FOR READING TILL THE END WHAT ??? loads of hugs and kisses :’)) also i know i said this before but posting after a rlly long time has lowkey made me anxious LOLL i think i could have done better with the fic esp the end bc it’s a little rushed. honestly speaking i am ready to move on to my next wip and i don’t wanna spend more time rewriting this one :(( i still love this piece though and i would definitely love to hear your thoughts amigos!! stay healthy and hydrated <33

thank you to mira for coming in clutch and helping me out with the plot when i was stuck + giving me her honest opinion! thank you to dori too for reading parts of this fic and giving me her opinion as well! i love you both :D

taglist: @notbeforelong @w3bqrl @rikiflowers @mochisnlix @allorysayshi @hiqhkey @angel-hyuckie @j4kesworld @timetoten @vantxx95 @sweetjaemss @ahnneyong @jennaissantes @sunshine-skz @baekhyunstruly @ja4hyvn @ily-cuz-i @kdyism @keemburley @n0hyuck @luvenshiti @donutswithjaminthemiddle @mosviqu @deobitiful @jeonnyread @pjofics @venusprada @matchahyuck @tbzussy @babyksworld @bockhyun @rbf-aceu @ablackbtsstan @tamakofever @naemakkuri @sadgirlroo @fariylixie0915 @pradagukkie @babyjenono @hibernatinghamster @jaemnationnn @variety-is-the-joy-of-life @carelessshootanonymous @nctzennikki09

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wcters · 2 months

Text

𝗕𝗔𝗖𝗞 𝗧𝗢 𝗠𝗔𝗦𝗦𝗔𝗖𝗛𝗨𝗦𝗘𝗧𝗧𝗦

chris sturniolo x fem!reader

word count: 1.3k

summary: You join your boyfriend, his brothers, parents, and best friend on a trip to their house in the Cape.

warnings/notes: established relationship, swearing, sleeping the the same bed, sexual innuendo, was going to make it longer but it sounded bad 😭, based on the video we become master chefs

The loud bustle of the airport drowned out Nick and Matt’s voices as you stood with them, Chris behind you with his arms wrapped around you. The two boys were sitting down with all of your suitcases leaned up against the wall you and Chris were standing up against. “You alright?” Chris whispered into your ear. “Yeah, fine. Just excited.” You mumbled back as to not interrupt his brothers. They were texting their parents and trying to figure out where you guys were meeting them.

“Okay. They said they’ll meet us close to the north side doors.” Nick told you as he finally stood up with Matt following him. You all grabbed your luggage and headed to meet them. The boys were back in Boston for their dad’s vacation and invited you to come with them. You agreed, obviously, having missed their parents and Trevor. You’d probably spend some time with your parents too while you’re down here.

You’re brought back to present time with Chris bumping his shoulder into yours and pointing ahead. Ahead were his parents, Marylou and Jimmy. “Hey!” You waved as you came closer. She and Jimmy said a quick ‘hi’ before hugging their sons. She then turned towards you. “Y/n, honey. You doing alright?” She asked as she pulled you into a hug. “Yes, ma’am. And you?” “Likewise.” You did the same with Jim, hugging and greeting each other before you all headed to the car and to the house. You, Nathan, the triplets, and their parents were all going to their house in the cape and even though the have a minivan, it couldn’t fit all of you. Jimmy and Marylou were going to go in one car while you and the boys went in the minivan.

You made it to the house, got into the designated cars, picked up Nate, and got to Cape Cod in record time. It only took about two hours, and the actual drive from Boston was about a little more than an hour. You were stuck in the backseat with Nick and Nate, but you didn’t really mind. You spent a lot of the time catching up with Nate and then using Nick’s shoulder as a pillow so you could take a nap.

When you got there, Marylou and Jimmy were already there and getting their bags out. “We’re going to bed soon. Feel free to stay up, but be quiet please. Y/n, make sure they behave.” Marylou spoke as she closed the trunk of the car. “You know it. Goodnight guys.” You replied as the boys and Jimmy said they’re good nights. The sun was setting and you were already tired from the flight and the car ride. You each went to your rooms, Nick, Nathan, and Matt sharing one to let you and Chris share one. His parents were fine with letting you share a room. You’ve been best friends since high school with all of the boys before you even started dating Chris, so his parents always trusted you and Chris.

You changed into sweatpants and a sweatshirt, all stolen from Chris. You walked into the kitchen and met the boys. “Do you guys have a plan or are we just hanging out?” You asked as you made your way next to your boyfriend who was on his phone. “Well, Nate wants pasta and that made me want pasta but we have nothing in the fridge so we’re going to go to the store.” Matt told you as Nate looked up and smiled. “Alright. Want me to drive?” “Nah, it’s okay.”

You all piled into the car and headed to the store to get the ingredients for the pasta and other food because they actually had nothing in the fridge. You followed the group around the store, arms wrapped around yourself because you were tired. They were vlogging this and you opted to stay in the background. You were standing with the cart in the sauce asile with Nick, Matt, and Nate when Chris came up to you with one hand holding the camera and another holding a large box of Pepsi. “Chris,” you scolded him as he asked Nick to put in the cart. “We’re going to be here for three days.” Nick scolded him as well. “He’s going to down them in one.” Nate half jokes from beside you. “He’s going to finish it tonight probably,” you added, “don’t be burping all night or I’m sleeping on the couch.” “I won’t!”

The rest of the time at the grocery consisted of the boys bickering about which pasta and sauce they wanted while you pushed the cart around. Before you left the store, you grabbed a couple coffee’s for everyone for the next few days and a red bull for you at that moment to try and stay up . . . And also help you deal with the chaos that was going to ensue as you attempted to make pasta in their kitchen that could not fit five people.

You eventually made it back to the house and put all the groceries in the fridge while Nate, Nick, and Chris started reading the directions for the pasta. The camera was sitting on top of the range hood as the recording was started. You cracked open a red bull while saying “this is my patience tonight” and taking a sip. You stayed in the corner of the kitchen, sitting on the counter with Chris between your legs while everyone else boiled the water.

“Look at these two,” Nate said as he grabbed the camera and turned it toward you, “not even helping.” Your one hand was in Chris’s hair while the other was taking a sip of the red bull while Chris was looking down at his phone. “I opted to stay out of the way.” You argued as Chris looked up. “Smart move.” Nate laughed as he high-fived you. “What about you?” “I’m keeping my allergies out of the way.” Your boyfriend told his best friend. “Alright, you both have excuses.”

Time passed with you hanging out in the corner as the boys joked around and filmed until the pasta was finally done. You thanked Matt as he got you your pasta and you moved to the table in the living room. You all took your seats at the table with Chris beside you. “I’ll get your reaction first Chris and then I’ll give you the Camera back,” Matt offered as he took the camera. Chris took a bite as Matt asked him how he liked it. “Fabuloso.” Chris answered as Matt then turned to you. “Y/n?” You moved your head up when you heard you name. “She’s too tired to even register what’s happening.” Nate laughed. “That’s true. It’s filling and I’m ready to go to bed.” You exclaimed, going back to your food.

You all talked and ate around the table, making plans for the next few days and reminiscing about childhood memories. “All right,” you stood up, “I’m heading to bed. Anybody want their plates put away?” They all declined and wished you goodnight as you went into the kitchen. As you went to go up the stairs you turned and faced them. “Remember to be quiet if you stay up later because your parents told you so, and you don’t want to mess with me if I’m woken up. You all know what I’m like.” Nate saluted, Chris smiled and put a thumbs up, and Nick and Matt nodded.

You fell asleep in no time from how tired you were, you didn’t even notice Chris entering the bedroom and getting into the bed. You only noticed him when you woke up the next morning and felt his body next to yours. You already knew that this trip would be good if you were waking up like this.

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euseokz · 3 months

Note

can you write friends to lovers smut for anton where they have crazy sexual tension pls🙏🏼💗

@ anton — we both want each other, why can’t we just let things go with the flow ? . cws : unprotected sex. creampie . slight size kink . big dick anton . wc : 2.0k+ . genre : smut

a/n : i hope this aligns with what you wanted nonnie ! somehow i always find myself only writing best-friend! anton whenever i write for him, and for some reason, i love it ! i just think he fits this trope so well 😮‍💨

BEST-FRIEND! ANTON who you’ve always shared some sort of sexual tension with, but that neither of you has ever acted on because you have always been afraid of what would happen if you did.

you knew it all. knew how he looked at you, how he’d look you up and down when you got more dressed up and get that little smirk on his lips, how he liked having a hand on your waist when you were in public not only in a protective way, but also because he liked to touch you, liked when people thought you were his. you knew when he was horny too, how his eyes would turn darker and his lips would twist into a sort of cocky smile, and you also knew what made him horny, what words you used and what touches you left on him that made him want to fuck you.

anton also knew all about you, you had each other all figured out, and still, somehow, had never fucked, because you were still afraid due to all the what if’s. what if that ended your friendship? what if one wanted something casual but the other wanted a proper relationship? what if having sex would completely ruin your dynamic and make things awkward? there were just too many possibilities, so you never acted on it — until it finally got to be too much and you did.

you had gone over to anton’s apartment, his roommates loudly talking about something in the next room while you two laid on his bed, close to each other but not as close as you actually wanted to be, having a conversation about whatever came up. you could feel anton’s gaze on you, almost burning into your skin. you had borrowed some clothes from him, a hoodie and a pair of shorts, something about wanting a more comfy outfit to wear instead of the one you had worn all day, and it was driving him insane. anton’s eyes couldn’t leave you, obsessed with how good his clothes looked on you, with how his already baggy hoodie looked baggier on your body, and how his shorts that usually ran just around his knees went down lower on you. you looked so good in his clothes it made him completely lose his mind, getting to a point where he was barely even listening and processing what you were saying and just ogling you. it should be uncomfortable, but somehow it also turned you on, knowing the sight of you was too much for him, that he couldn’t focus on anything but you.

maybe if you hadn’t burrowed his clothes things wouldn’t have developed the way they did, or maybe they would but it would’ve just taken a bit longer, but once you caught anton’s eyes stuck on your body for the nth time you decided you had enough, tired of being cautious and simply deciding that enough was enough, that you needed to be bold, which was what led you to blurt out the next words that came out of your mouth as if they were nothing.

“you should just fuck me if you’re gonna continue looking at me like that”

it took a moment for anton to register your words. was he hallucinating? was that the next stage of the level of horniness he was experiencing? he didn’t know, so he looked at you, a surprised but confused look spread across his features. you repeated the question, and this time he knew it was real, that he wasn’t hearing or imagining things, you had actually told him he should fuck you. his immediate response was to jump on you, but he held himself back, only turning more towards you instead, now being on his side while you still laid back against his pillows, asking you through an all too shy tone if you were sure, his shyness ridiculous taking into account his actions up until that point.

“i wouldn’t propose it if i wasn’t” you replied, a smug smile on your lips, and that was when anton finally let his instincts win and jumped on you, kissing you harder than he had ever kissed someone, cupping your cheeks in his hands with so much strength it made you wonder if he was afraid you’d slip away or vanish into thin air. his lips felt good against yours, the way he sucked on your bottom lip making you mewl against him, a small smirk curling the corners of anton’s mouth because of it. he wanted you to be as into it as him, wanted you to want him to fuck you as much as he did, so he moved on top of you, both hands still cupping your cheeks while one of his knees moved to separate your legs, pressing against your covered middle softly, just hard enough to elicit another small moan to slip past your lips and into his. he started moving it, drawing it in small circles and making sure to start pressing more and more into you, until you were whimpering against him relentlessly, wordlessly begging for more until you finally spoke up, your voice much whinier this time as you told him to just fuck you — and because anton wasn’t one to ever deny you anything, he did, not much time separating the last kiss you shared and the moment you finally found yourselves naked and with him pushing himself into you for the first time.

your pussy was absolutely soaked by then, all thanks to anton’s continuous teasing, making the job of thrusting into you somewhat easier, even if you still struggled a bit to take him fully. anton swore he would cum as soon as he bottomed out solely based on the wondrous feeling of your pussy clenching around him as he dragged his cock languidly into you, getting lost in how you wrapped around him so well, so tightly, a warm feeling surrounding his length, making his brain grow fuzzy with pleasure.

you just looked too good underneath him. your face was twisted into an expression of pure pleasure, brows furrowed and lips parted in a perfect “o” shape, moaning as he started to slowly pull out, giving you time to adjust. you felt as if anton was splitting you open, his cock so thick it barely fit inside you, stretching you out as much as you could take while still feeling good, the initial weird uncomfortableness eventually passing by as he kept moving, keeping his pace slow and steady, wanting to give you time to adjust, being patient because the last thing he wanted was to accidentally hurt you. your pussy looked so good taking him though, swallowing him and wrapping around him so snuggly, making anton wince in pleasure. both your gazes were focused on it, on how your cunt was taking him, each thrust making anton’s cock glisten more with your slick, the visible veins running up and down his length throbbing in anticipation for the moment he would be able to start fucking you properly.

in an attempt to help relax you even more, anton leaned down for another kiss, his hair falling over his eyes as he pressed his lips against yours. this kiss is softer, sweeter, just as needy as the ones you shared previously but not as fast paced. anton wanted to treasure the moment, live it to the fullest and have every second of it imprinted in his brain, afraid of ever forgetting the first time he ever truly had you in his arms. he held you closer, still kissing you, sucking on your tongue while slightly speeding up his thrusts, testing how well you’d take it — and as expected, you excelled, moaning into the kiss and clamping down around him harder, eventually breaking apart from him, wanting to scream anton’s name but suddenly remembering his roommates were still in the room next door, so you couldn’t. instead though, you pressed your forehead against his, closing your eyes and whimpering about good it felt, about how good his big dick felt stretching you out, fucking you so well, better than anyone ever had. your words affected anton, making him moan, rolling his eyes back in pleasure while changing his posture, hoisting himself higher by placing his hands by either side of your head, picking up his pace and moving more swiftly, by now already able to build up a quicker pace with how well your pussy was taking him.

“you drive me crazy, you know that, right?” he asked, eyes locked on yours, his tone more unstable than usual. you nodded, your expression flustered as you brought him back to you, wrapping both arms around his neck and lacing both of your legs around his waist, holding him in place, wanting to feel anton’s wide frame pressed against yours, his weight on top of you comforting in a way. he also embraced you, reaching behind you and hugging you close, his hands interlocking it’s fingers behind your head and holding you up so your face was close to his, forcing you to maintain the eye contact as he continued fucking you, moving faster, more precisely, reaching deep inside you with his cock, his tip kissing your cervix softly with every thrust. anton felt like he was in heaven — you both did, so lost in each other that nothing else mattered, only able to focus on looking at one another and feeling how good you both made each other feel. it was all too much, too intense, so when anton blurted out his next words without even thinking twice, neither of you reacted as if they were odd for him to say.

“i love you” he told you, his tone sincere and his voice steadier this time, as if he was determined to say it in a way that would let you know he was being truthful. you only kissed him, pressing your lips against this desperately and bringing him as close to you as humanly possible, pulling away for a second just to say those three words back to him, your voice whinier than his, but still just as honest.

anton’s thrusts continued steady, dragging in and out of you deliciously, reaching that sweet spot inside you that made an invisible knot start forming in your lower stomach, growing tighter, ready to snap at any moment. you were both close, so through his low groans, with his lips still pressed closed to yours, anton asked if he could cum inside, if he could fill you up with his cum, and you, in your hazy state, said yes, asking for it, his thrusts growing rougher for a second until you were both reaching your orgasms. anton’s came first, his thrusts starting to get sloppier but not completely losing their pace as he kept going while his cock twitched inside you, shooting creamy strings of warm cum inside you, painting your insides white — that feeling being exactly what finally ignited your own high, one loud moan leaving your lips when it hit before anton was pulling you in for yet another kiss, trying to silence you as you both reveled in your own pleasures, whining into one another as he started slowing down, eventually finally coming to a halt with his dick still buried deep inside you. you both felt at cloud nine, beginning to come back to your senses and finally realizing what you had admitted to in the middle of your sex-induced, foggy states, pleasure having clouded your thoughts throughout the whole thing and making you bolder than usual apparently.

“did you mean it?” anton began, his voice soft as he pressed his forehead to you, both your eyes closed while you still held each other close. “when you said you loved me?”

you hummed in agreement, deciding to be honest, nervous when you asked if he did too. anton replied that yes, he did, both of you smiling at that moment, giggling before sharing another kiss, this one more intimate, as if you were making a promise to each other to stop avoiding your feelings, and to finally lean into them, to let yourselves be together like you had been wanting for so long.

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riizeblr · 4 months

Note

I don’t know if i’m crazy but i just have this wonbin as your older brothers friend brain-rot. He knew you for ages and now he finally has a chance to defile you and show you the ways of the world as is his duty

rating: 18+. mdni.

no PLEASE because what if wonbin never showed any interest in you until you started seeing other guys. it made his heart drop and jealousy bubble in his chest because he was so used to you doting on him and making him feel so superior and wanted. you always talked about how you were gonna marry him when you grew up and promising that he would be the only person you would ever like. you stopped saying such childish things when you started high school but wonbin still convinced himself that you still liked him.

wonbin came home after he graduated uni, still unsure as to why he was returning in the first place when he could have stayed in the city. he found it hard to establish anything there because he wasn’t as worshiped in the city as he was in your hometown and he thought that coming back would make things feel like they used to. he was wrong and everything was so different aside from what was left of his high school friends and peers. even you had changed more than he liked.

you were taking classes at your local college, doing what a normal college student your age would be doing, going out and such. you were very reserved when you were younger and you always stuck by your brother and wonbin but when he was greeted with little more than a fond, lingering look he felt off.

he hated seeing you give other guys the same kind of attention to what you would give him when you were young. he knew that you were still as innocent as you used to be but there was a more flirtatious and bold undertone in your actions and words and wonbin knew you were likely to act on them soon.

wonbin was determined to make sure that he was person you would do it with. you had promised him all of you your entire life and he wasn’t going to let that go. he told himself that you were the reason he was coming back to your hometown and not because of the difficulties of living in the city and no longer being the special it boy.

it was difficult to get past your brother at first but after a while he figured that you just had a silly little crush on his best friend again. wonbin made it seem like that, too, by dramatically rolling his eyes and laughing along with your brother when you would blush at whatever wonbin would tease you about.

but in reality wonbin was texting you everyday, complimenting you and touching you more than he ever had. he would make plans with you and not let you cancel even if you already had plans before he spoke to you. you still had those childhood feelings for him and the childish part of you was so eager to please wonbin that you let him do all those things.

wonbin could see how easily you slipped back into the role of worshipping him and putting him first and he loved it. he wanted all of you and you were so willing to give everything to him.

he went so slow with everything. kissing you and watching you blush, making you yearn for more until you were shyly asking for him to kiss you. teasing the hem of your shirt and hovering his hand over your bare stomach. he could feel the sexual tension growing so quickly and he was so pleased by it because it was exactly what he wanted. he knew you were so fed up and frustrated that he was surprised you didn’t flat out ask him to fuck you.

when wonbin finally did, he was almost as pathetic as you were. it felt so good and so right to have you. the way you called out for him and molded into whatever he wanted made him melt. you were so sweet and beautiful that wonbin decided that there was no way he would ever let you go.

#discography !#feat. wonbin !#wonbin x reader #wonbin smut #riize x reader #riize smut #riize hard hours #riize imagine #wonbin x y/n #riize #wonbin

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 11 months

Note

Aita for telling my ex boyfriend I don’t miss him?

Tw for talk of sexual activity, emotional neglect

For context, I (19f) broke up with my boyfriend (18m) three months ago. We were going strong for a day short of nine months, but he was going to meet my family and my anxiety got in the way so I panicked and self sabotaged the best relationship I ever had. I know now I was a coward and I hurt him deeply, we’d even planned on attending the same university and starting a bookstore together

He really was the best thing to ever happen to me. He was unconditionally supportive of me when I deal with my emotionally manipulative home life, always told me how pretty I am, got me gifts and would binge my favorite shows so I could infodump to him. He’d been seriously neglected and borderline abused by his toxic ex boyfriend (an ex-mutual friend) but he always went above and beyond to make sure he wasn’t projecting onto me and our relationship. I was head over heels

But I broke up with him the day before our nine-month milestone because I was so sure that he would break my heart and leave me just like everyone else in my life had (and a week before we were to fly cross-country to meet my parents. I went alone.) And he told me in the many conversations we’ve had since then that it ruined his self-esteem and made him question his own self worth if he couldn’t even convince me that he was worth keeping around

And he said that he had planned to ask me to marry him when we got out of university in a couple years. He was so devastated over the phone, but I stuck with my decision to not date anyone during college. I needed to focus on myself and my own mental health… which I haven’t been good about doing (looking at my various online dating profiles)

While we were together, all of my friends were in their horny college phases and hooking up with anything that moved and they’d leave me out of friend activities because I was with my boyfriend. It made me feel alone and isolated and I’d cry to my boyfriend about it and only realize later how awful it was to complain to my significant other about how badly I wanted to be single. Yet, he never complained. I was awful to him

We’ve recently become friends again and we’ve started having casual sex. He has an almost unnaturally low libido compared to my super high one so when he calls me, I’m always at his front door. He’s always so sweet and caring, even after we’ve broken up, and he always checks in on me in the following days to make sure I’m okay. He’s undoubtedly my best friend and my romantic feelings for him have all pretty much died

Last night I spent the night at his place. As we were drifting off, I heard him mumble that he misses me and wrote it off as his sleepy pillow talk. We’d talked in length about never getting back together because of how I hurt him and I agreed it was for the best. This morning, he asked me if hed said anything strange and I didn��t bring it up until he kept nagging me and I told him what he’d said.

He started apologizing profusely and I said I wasn’t upset, because I’m not. I asked him if he meant it and he said he didn’t know. I said it’s fine, he can keep the answer to himself when he figured it out, I didn’t miss him. I ate the breakfast he made and left for work

Now I’m sitting at work and feeling really bad about it. I want to still be his friend and still sleep with him for as long as he’ll have me, but I also feel like I shut him down and hurt him again. I don’t know if my decision to put my foot down was the right one

So, tumblr, AITA?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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word-wytch · 1 year

Text

Don't Stand So Close To Me — Chapter 5

Eddie x Teacher!Reader

Chapter 5/? 3.2k. Series Masterlist

✏︎ A lesson in rock history and the things you can say with a thumb.

✏︎ Series Summary: Forced to move back home to Hawkins after your fiancé cheats on you, you begin to fall in love again with an audacious 20 year old metalhead, only there’s one problem — he’s still in high school and you’re his English teacher.

While you struggle starting over in a place you never thought you would return, Eddie struggles feeling stuck in a place he can’t manage to leave — until you offer to help him. Of all the lessons learned, the most important are the ones you teach each other.

✏︎ Series CW: forbidden romance, slow burn, smut (18+ mdni), true love, internal conflict, student-teacher relationship, 10 year age gap, mutual pining, sexual tension, emotions, drama, angst, character development, happy ending :)

Chapter warnings: drinking mention

“Happy Monday!” chimed Ms. Click, fixing her coffee on the counter in the teacher’s lounge. “How was your weekend, sweetie?”

You turned to her as you nestled the glass coffee pot back onto the warmer. “Oh, you know. Just catching up on errands and chores. Same old, same old.” Oh, and wrestling with thoughts I really shouldn’t be having about my student. You figured it was best to leave that part out. Though if you were being totally honest you had done more of that than anything else this weekend. You couldn’t believe yourself.

“Oh I hear ya, it’s real easy for things like that to just take over. Pretty soon you feel like you’re just living the same week over and over again and then whoops! 20 years go by!” she said with a loud and slightly pained laugh.

You smiled weakly. “Yeah, time really does fly.”

“It does if you’re not careful! You’ve got to treasure every precious moment while you can,” she said, giving a gentle pat on your forearm before turning to leave.

“I try to,” you said, turning to open a new carton of milk for your coffee. You watched it swirl as you poured it in and thought about Eddie Munson again. You wondered what a what a weekend was like for him, what sort of trouble he might get into. You thought about him cruising down the road in his van at night, blasting his music and driving way over the speed limit — not a care in the world. You thought about being a passenger, about laughing with him as he took his hands off the wheel to play air guitar to a song you didn’t recognize.

“Hey!” she said Diane in a little whisper, waving her hand between you and your coffee.

You jolted upward and turned to her. “Oh hey! Sorry, I’m a total space cadet today apparently.”

“It’s Monday, you’re allowed,” she said with a warm chuckle. She leaned back against the coffee station. “Sooo, your birthday is on Friday. It’s the big 3-0 right? Have any plans?”

Yes, that. You hadn’t forgotten, though you secretly wished you had. “I’m shocked you remembered!”

“Well, birthdays are circled on the office calendar,” she said, folding her arms with a little smirk, “I can’t give myself that much credit, but we should really do something. It’s a big one.”

“Yeah, you’re right. Honestly I hadn’t given it much thought.”

“There’s always Pal Joey’s. At the very least I can bake you a cake and we can just get drunk together, right?” she said with a playful chuckle.

You laughed, “Yeah, I don’t need anything extravagant. Just something low key would be nice. Actually, I have a friend I haven’t seen since I moved back over the summer. She’s been busy with her small kids, I bet she’d appreciate getting out for a night.”

“That’s the spirit! Ok, got any preference for cake flavors?”

You thought for a moment, a smile playing on your lips as you brought a curved finger to them, “Surprise me.”

______

You set off down the main hallway like you did every morning, careful not to slosh the remainder of your coffee too hard as you walked. You dodged the usual obstacles — kids with headphones on not paying attention, couples leaning against their lockers, jocks giving a football a few passes before another teacher reprimanded them.

You were about halfway there when you smelled it — cigarette smoke. Not the sort of smoke left over on clothing, but actual active smoke coming from someone nearby. You glanced around to see if you could catch a plume and that was when you saw him.

You didn’t know his name but he must have been a junior at least. He was more than six feet tall, an athlete, as you could tell from varsity jacket he had on.

“Hey! No smoking in the hallway,” you said firmly as you approached him at the lockers.

He looked at you like you were a small child threatening to tattle on him. “Or what?”

“Or I’m giving you detention. Put it out, now.”

He rolled his eyes at you, “Ooh, so scary.” His friends around him chuckled.

You swallowed, feeling small all of a sudden. “I’m serious, put it out right now.”

“Jeez, calm down, bitch.” His friends erupted in laughter, practically tripping over themselves now.

Your eyes narrowed, heart beating into your throat.

“The fuck did you just call her?” a voice cut through from behind you.

You recognized it before you whipped your head around to see him. “Eddie —”

He marched up to the athlete in front of you. “Here, let me make it easier for you.” He snatched the cigarette out of his mouth and threw it on the ground to stomp it out. There were daggers in his eyes. “Say it again.”

He looked at Eddie with a mixture of shock and confusion. “Jeez since when are you a goody two-shoes, Munson?”

“Principal’s office, now,” you said, pointing at the athlete.

He rolled his eyes again. “You gonna have your pet escort me?”

You glanced over at Eddie, you could practically feel the heat coming off of him as he glowered behind you like a shadow. “No, I can do that myself, unless you’d rather have security escort you. Your choice.”

He sighed. “Fine, Jesus.”

“I can take it from here, Eddie. Thank you.”

He glanced back and forth between the two of you, looking hesitant. “If you say so,” he conceded softly.

You smiled at him with gracious eyes, then turned to the athlete. “Come on.”

Eddie bent down to grab the cigarette off the floor, his eyes did not leave you.

“I can take that,” you said, extending your hand.

He placed the flattened cigarette into your palm, slow enough for you to feel the calluses on his fingers as they lingered for a short moment. Yours curled around them just enough to brush the back of his knuckles as his hand left yours, as if they had a mind of their own. Your heart skipped a beat and you found the courage to meet his gaze again.

“Thank you.”

He bowed his head slightly, “Sure thing.” His eyes were dark and intense, like there was something more he wanted to say.

You swallowed and broke his gaze. “Alright, let’s get going before I’m late for my own class.”

You walked swiftly toward the principal’s office, the two of you silent in the noisy din of the hallway as the athlete kept pace reluctantly beside you. You were halfway down the hall when you felt the urge to glance over your shoulder.

Eddie was still standing where you left him, still as a statue amidst the chaos of the hallway, watching you with careful eyes.

______

Eddie watched you from the back of your fourth period English class, as he did every day.

He watched as you as you paced about, the way you leaned against the desk as you sifted through your notes. He noticed how thoughtfully you chose your words, how eloquently you spoke.

He wondered what you were like outside of school — what you would be like at a concert, a bar, a restaurant, a movie. He wondered what sort of observations you would make about the world around you. What sort of things you would want to talk about outside the strict confines of this building, outside your role in it. You were always so good at keeping the face you’d put on that morning. He wanted to see you without it.

Wanted to see you first thing in the morning, the sleep still in your eyes. Wanted to see you in pajamas making coffee. Wanted to feel the warmth of your skin still heated from your bed, to peer over your shoulder as you cooked your eggs, to tickle you until you turned around to kiss him.

“In chapters 13 though 15 we can see that he’s both too scared to call Jane and too scared to sleep with Sunny, even though deep down it seems he wants to. Holden alienates himself as a form of self-protection, which is a motif in the novel,” you explained. “A motif,” you scratched the word onto the board, “— is a recurring structure, contrast, or literary device that can help to inform the reader of the text’s major themes.”

You turned toward the board to finish writing the definition. It was then that Eddie saw Patrick’s arm extend behind him with a folded piece of paper that Jason promptly snatched.

You paused, glancing toward the back of the classroom at the movement.

Jason and Patrick froze like statues.

Your gaze lingered a moment, then you continued, turning toward the board again.

Eddie watched out of the corner of his eye as Jason opened the note slowly, trying to minimize the crinkle of the paper. He stifled a snicker and took his pen to it, scribbling in haste.

“Now, what are some other motifs that you may have noticed so far?” you asked, turning toward the class.

Jason froze again, sliding his notebook over the paper slowly, leaving some space to continue writing discreetly at the bottom.

Eddie felt his pulse rise and shot Jason a threatening glare.

Since when are you a goody two-shoes, Munson? The words rolled around in his head. As much as he hated to admit it, there was some truth to them.

The truth was that he had smoked in school before. More than once. The difference was he never got caught. He had been disrespectful on more than one occasion toward the faculty. He’d never called anyone names, but he’d certainly rolled his eyes, certainly given them a hard time. He’d sneak out, skip class, pass notes, run down the hallway — he even shot a spit ball at Gareth once, but only because he deserved it after flaking out on Hellfire because some girl invited him over to work on a project.

Jason caught Eddie’s glare and made a face at him, passing the note forward to Patrick who snickered when he opened it.

You whipped your head toward the back corner of the room and locked eyes with Patrick. “Excuse me, is something funny?”

Eddie’s eyes bored into his desk. He could feel the heat creeping up his neck.

“No ma’am, sorry,” said Patrick, straightening up.

Your eyes lingered a moment suspiciously but you let it go, sighing in annoyance as you turned back toward the board.

The note passing ceased after that.

It wasn’t until after the bell rang that both Jason and Patrick made eye contact with Eddie again. This time it was in the midst of laughter as they were leaving.

______

By the time Eddie Munson had plunked himself down in his usual spot on the other side of your desk, you were admittedly exhausted. You hated to be one of those pedestrian I hate Mondays people, but today really took it out of you for some reason.

Maybe it had something to do with the war you were waging in your mind over the man sitting across from you, but when you saw his sweet oval face again you felt the energy suddenly return to you, like a second wind. Like a breath of fresh air.

“Thank you for… intervening earlier today,” you said graciously as you filed away the papers on your desk, clearing the space.

Eddie gave a single nod. “I wanted to put it out on his face, but uh, pretty sure that’s also against the rules, so…” he said with a little chuckle.

Even behind his joking you could tell that he meant it. It stirred something in you, like a growling in the pit of your stomach. Something dormant and primal. You looked at his strong hands as he fidgeted with the pen in front of him, then your eyes traveled up to his forearms. He was wearing that flannel again with the sleeves rolled up and you wished you could ignore it, but instead you imagined what they would feel like wrapped protectively around your waist.

You cleared your throat and tucked your hair behind your ear. “Yeah, I’m afraid so,” you said with a little smile. “You know, you would think that after eight years of teaching I would be used to that sort of treatment but it still catches me off guard sometimes.”

Eddie raised his eyebrows curiously, “Eight years?” he asked. You could almost see him doing the math in his head.

Your stomach dropped. “Yeah, um, I actually turn 30 on Friday,” you said with a nervous chuckle.

Eddie balked, “Seriously?”

“Seriously.”

He smirked, his eyes narrowing, “No way. I mean — sorry, it’s not a bad thing! It’s just hard to believe is all.”

“You want to see my drivers license?”

Eddie laughed, “No, no. It’s just that… you don’t seem like it to me. Not looks wise anyway. Maturity wise you’re probably closer to uh, 500 — you know, like an elf.”

You snorted. “Thanks. That’s so much better.”

“No, I mean like Arwen old, not Galadriel old,” he said, stumbling over himself. “Sorry I’ll stop, I’m a dumbass. It doesn’t matter. It’s just a number anyway.”

There was a strange relief that came over you when he said that, more than you wanted to admit to yourself.

You had to laugh. “Arwen old, now that’s something you don’t hear every day.”

“Well, take it as a compliment. I mean you’re —” he gestured to you, up and down with his hand, his eyes widening.

You knew what he was going to say. No, you wanted to think you knew, but did you really know? You knew you shouldn’t press but you wanted to hear it. Your mouth betrayed you. “I’m what?” you asked softly.

Eddie swallowed. “You’re…” he blinked, his dark eyes darting back and forth between yours. You could see the gears turning in his head, weighing the options of what to say next. “You’re timeless.”

Timeless. Now that was a word you were not expecting. Not too bold like beautiful, or cheap like pretty. You were tempted to commend him on his vocabulary choice.

“Timeless,” you said in quiet awe as a smile crept across your face. “I’ll take that.”

Eddie relaxed into his chair, seeming pleased with himself.

“Alright, what’s on the agenda for today?” There was a guilt that nagged at you for prompting such an intimate moment with your student, but then again, was he not the one who prompted it with his gesture? Still, it was your responsibility to be the bigger person, you knew that. And yet…

Eddie was doing well enough in your class. He was turning in his homework and did well on the last quiz. Today you decided to focus on History again since that seemed to be his biggest challenge, which meant that Eddie was now seated beside you — and that was another challenge.

Eddie Munson had a way of being around you that was hard to ignore. It was the way he looked at you from beneath his lashes, the way he almost put his shoulder behind yours as you both crowded over the textbook. You swore you weren’t imagining it.

It was when you pointed at a line in the text, the way he inched closer to it, turned his head toward you ever so slightly, his face inches from yours.

You could smell him again. The sweet musk of his skin, the soft scent of whatever he put in his hair. He was so close you could feel the gentle puff of his breath against your face. Your curious eyes dropped to his lips — so incredibly plush with a perfect cupid’s bow. Your animal brain betrayed you and you imagined, for just a split second, what they would feel like against yours. What he would taste like.

You cleared your throat, face flushing as you broke the tension. “So, did you do anything fun this weekend?”

There was a gleam in Eddie’s eyes. “Yeah, actually. Mercyful Fate was playing in Indianapolis on Saturday. Really good show.”

You nodded curiously, “Hmm, I’ve never heard of them.”

Eddie smirked, “Yeah, I figured not. I mean — most people haven’t unless they’re into metal. Which, I don’t want to make any assumptions, but…” he chuckled.

“You’re correct,” you said with a little laugh.

His eyes were tender, “What kind of music are you into?”

You hummed and glanced down at the textbook again thoughtfully, “Let’s see… I like all sorts of stuff. Older stuff like Van Morrison and Simon and Garfunkel, newer stuff like The Police and Tears for Fears. Oh and I love Joni Mitchell, especially Joni Mitchell. Her music is poetry, truly.”

Eddie hummed thoughtfully, “All good artists.”

“I mean I’m not opposed to metal. I just haven’t heard enough of it I guess. I do really like rock music, actually I love Led Zeppelin. I mean that’s not metal but,” you said in jest making the rock horn symbol with your hand.

Eddie laughed, eyes crinkling, looking at you like you were an adorable child who just said something funny. His hands came around yours impulsively, tucking your extended thumb in across your two middle fingers. “Like this,” he said sweetly.

You swallowed, face flushing. His hands were so warm, the softness of his palms surprised you. They lingered for a moment, clutching your hand before letting go to demonstrate.

“This,” he formed the symbol with his hand, “Means rock. This?” extended his thumb, “Means ‘I love you’ in sign language.”

You chuckled, tucking your hair behind your ear. “Rookie mistake I guess.”

“It’s ok, it’s a common one. It’s not exactly been around for that long. Dio was actually the one who started doing it like five or so years ago. See, he’s super Italian and his grandma would do it like this as a sort of… spell, I guess, to keep the evil eye away.” He demonstrated, pointing his horns at you. “But then Dio kept doing it on stage, sort of adapted it into a symbol for rock.”

You nodded curiously, “See, you’re teaching me something now.”

He smiled, “I do know a few things, might not exactly be useful things, but…”

“All knowledge is useful. In fact I think it’s a shame that we place so much value on grades. I mean honestly, most of this stuff you’re not even going to need to know to get through life. I can tell you that for a fact. I mean I know I’m not supposed to be saying that, but…”

Eddie nodded, his eyes were soft and distant. “I wish more people thought like you.”

You could feel the heat rushing to your face again. You met his eyes and smiled softly.

You turned your attention back to the history textbook. After another twenty minutes, when it was clear that your attention spans were starting to wane, you called it for the evening.

You and Eddie left together again, out to the parking lot through the shortcut by the gym. Not a soul in sight in the hallway. He held the door open for you as you left.

Eddie was parked next to you this time.

“See you tomorrow,” you said, waving at him over the top of your little car as you unlocked it. The autumn wind kicked up, tousling your hair and scattering leaves across the parking lot.

“See ya,” he said, throwing open the door to his van.

He flashed you the rock horns again — thumb extended.

______

A/N: I just wanted to take this moment to thank every single one of my incredible readers — you guys. Every person who comments and shares each week, even the people who don't. I see your little hearts and it fills me with such joy. I am so lucky to have such a thoughtful audience that I can engage with and gush about my story with in real time. You make me feel like Charles Dickens.

My hope for this story is that it can reach as large an audience as possible, so if you can help me do that by sharing it, I would be endlessly grateful. I love you guys. 💚

Quick side note — if you don't see your name listed here but asked to be tagged it's because it would not let me tag you and I wanted to make room for the tags that are working!! tumblr only lets me tag a certain number of people so the list will be continued in the comments!

Taglist: @mermaidsandcats29 @toxicjayhoo @ooo-protean-ooo @jadequeen88 @wroteclassicaly @inknopewetrust @msgexymunson @bebe0701 @latenighttalkingwithgrapejuice @bibieddiesgf @idkidknemore @alizztor @godcreatoreli @shotgunhallelujah @ethereal27cereal @munsonsgirl71 @luna-munson83 @eddiemunsonsbitcch @tlclick73 @emxxblog @siriusmuggle @sidthedollface2 @dollalicia @lma1986 @catherinnn @maximizedrhythms @eddiemunson4life420 @readsalot73 @ruby-dragon @3rriberri @princess-eddie @nightless @eddiemunson011 @eddieswifu @thew0rldsastage @quinnsfineline @chaoticgood-munson @edsforehead @hanahkatexo @eddiemunsonsbedroom @chainsawmunson @beep-beep-sherlock @emily-roberts @averagemisfit03 @slay-and-gay @vintagehellfire @haylaansmi @newlips @munsins @sllooney @lunaladybug734

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson older reader #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson x teacher!reader #don't stand so close to me #my writing

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musingsofanaroace · 2 months

Text

Realizing I was AroAce

When did I realize I was AroAce?

It was in 1995, when I was eleven going on twelve. During that time, boys started liking girls (or boys), and girls started liking boys (or girls). And the conversations evolved to include discussions about crushes, dating, kissing, and gossip. And I was totally lost. Never had I experienced this thing called a crush, nor did I have any interest in dating or kissing anyone. For a little while, I thought everyone had lost their minds.

So I did what I always did when in a situation incomprehensible to me: I analyzed it to death. I wrote down all the incongruities between me and my peers. I never had a crush and had no desire to French kiss anyone. In fact, it sounded quite gross. Swapping spit with someone seemed unsanitary and unnecessary. But having their first kiss seemed to be the only thing the girls in my year wanted to talk about. And when they got older, the obsession turned to sex, which I really didn’t understand. Why would anyone want to engage in that activity other than for reproductive purposes? With these facts, I came to the conclusion that I didn’t desire sexual stuff. Since I didn't know about the existence of the word asexual, I invented my own: nonsexual.

I defined nonsexual as someone who doesn’t experience crushes or desire sex. I know that this definition is quite limited and only describes asexuals who are sex averse or sex repulsed. But at the time, I didn't know that asexuals could be either sex neutral or sex favorable.

Once I figured out what to call my lack of sexual attraction, I moved on to romance. I knew I felt no desire to go on dates, hold hands, or get married. The whole process seemed like a waste of time and effort. In the time it would take to go on a date with someone, I could have spent that time doing something more productive. Like washing my clothes or reading a book or playing a board game with a friend. And watching couples get romantic in front of me, whether in the movies or in real life, always gave me the ick. In all honesty, this entire romance thing truly baffled me. Since I didn’t know the term aromantic, I dubbed it nonromantic.

At the time, I defined nonromantic as someone who doesn’t experience romantic feelings toward other people. And surprisingly, this definition aligns pretty well with that of aromantic.

What was my reaction to being AroAce?

I just accepted it. Never did I feel a desire to fit in, and peer pressure never impacted me. I had a fiercely independent and strong-willed personality. Also, I always stuck out like an odd duck, and I just embraced this identity. What else could I do? I definitely didn’t know at the time that I had AuDHD.

And another factor, I had just started puberty and with that came gender dysphoria. I didn’t have the time or energy to freak out about both my sexuality and gender. And since gender had confused me the longest, that’s the one I continued to obsess over.

When did I discover the term AroAce?

While doing my undergraduate degree, I discovered AVEN and the term asexual. I also learned that sexual drive differs from sexuality and that the term “sex averse” described me the best. (Note: A sex averse individual doesn’t mind if others have sex; it’s just not for them.)

While doing my graduate degree, I discovered the term aromantic. I also learned about the different types of attraction one can experience. Shortly after that, I found the term that resonated with me the most: AroAce!

What was my coming out experience?

I don’t really have a pivotal “coming out” moment. When I realized that I was AroAce (nonsexual and nonromantic), I simply talked to my madre about it. She just accepted it. Then I talked to my padre. He didn’t understand it, but at the the same time, he didn’t make a big deal out of it. To be honest, I didn’t even know at the time I was doing a thing called “coming out”. I was simply sharing a discovery I made about myself, and I felt comfortable telling them about it.

Do I feel apart of the lgbtqia+ community?

When I first came out as AroAce (nonsexual and nonromantic), the initials were lgbt, and I didn’t realize that I belonged to the community. I didn’t realize this until I discovered AVEN. At uni, I tried to join a rainbow alliance, but the members didn’t consider me “queer enough”, so after attending one meeting, I didn’t return.

Now, I do consider myself apart of the community, but I still don’t feel comfortable entering queer spaces. I know that I shouldn’t allow my one negative experience to hold me back, but I do find it hard to get over past rejections because I have rejection sensitive dysphoria (ADHD). I’m working on it and one day, I may attend my first Pride. Who knows?

Do I want a queer platonic partner?

I don’t really know. Perhaps? But in my forty years, I haven’t met (in real life) another “out” person on the A-spectrum. So right now, it doesn’t seem likely. Mayhap in the future? I guess only time will tell.

And this concludes how I realized I was AroAce. If you have anything to add, please leave it in the comments. Until next time, take care and stay curious.

#aroace #asexual #aromantic #personal essay #lgbtqia

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kitmoas · 1 year

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Now, then, and Forever/

Summary: Sometimes you have to dig through the ashes

Word Count: about 10k

Warnings: ANGST (vague/brief mentions of Sexual Assault, Death, Suicide, and Self Harm), Fighting and Avenger work, and then verbal fights

*As always, let me know if I missed anything important*

A/N: This is the first part of the TGU6: Season 1 Finale! As you guys voted for, the finale is separated into two halves. Part 2 will be posted tomorrow around the same time!! ALSO there might be so many mistakes and I suck so I do be sorry my loves

***MINORS DNI*** PAY ATTENTION TO TAGS and hit the KEEP READING if you are 18+ and Open to Reading*** ***18+ ONLY***

Training Grounds Master List

“It isn’t something I’m used to, you know?” The sun shines brightly against the shiny skyscrapers all around the two, rays hitting cars’ mirrors far below them as they take a snack break in between civilian tasks.

The boy nods, a barely there sigh as he waits for what comes next. He knows every line, and knows the troubles. It wasn’t something that made him happy, and sometimes he wishes that his best friend never met her girlfriend. He hates the thought, the two were basically perfect together but with the beloved princess came two people that he believed would be the archer’s downfall one way or another.

“I love her…but I know I’m going to lose her one day. I’m not the person that people keep around and I get that, I’m tainted and not good.” Even though the brunette has said these words hundreds of times, it still gets stuck in her throat.

Peter sighs, trying to gather the strength to not get angry. He’s not mad at anyone in particular, he hates being angry, but the frustration he feels by this entire situation is getting to be too much. The young boy doesn’t know too much about relationships, only really being with MJ, but he does know that the four of them need to figure out what is going on before it destroys them all. “Kate..you know I don’t believe that and neither does she.”

The young brunette shakes her head, pulling her legs up so they no longer dangle over the edge. Wrapping her arms around her knees, leaning her forehead against her arms, making her look even younger than she is.

Peter raises his hand, hesitant and hanging in the air near his best friend’s shoulder before he lets it fall back to his side. He can’t push too much, knowing the girl would immediately retract into herself and hide all of her emotions.

“I’ve done everything, anything I could. I just wanted them to love me. I want them to look at me like the books, you know? I get it’s not up to them, it isn’t their job but sometimes I just want to be good enough just..being me.” The way she speaks is frantic, fast and almost out of it. It’s almost as if she’s not even there, just a mindless rattling of her thoughts.

“I don’t want to say it again, but at this point I’m going to. It feels like that saying, don’t meet your heroes and that sucks but Kate you are not being treated correctly by them. Your girl shouldn’t be letting them treat you this way either, and no matter how amazing she is that doesn’t give her a pass to let others treat you like shit.” The young man isn’t sure why he decided to signal you out, but he did. Trying to shrug off the guilt, he stays head strong in his statement.

“Clint turned out fine.” Kate’s voice is small, an attempt at her know-it-all mask. It’s a pitiful effort, they both know that but neither point it out.

Closing his eyes, the grip on his soda tightens just a little and cracks the glass slightly before he takes a deep calming breath. “Well.. maybe that’s because you didn’t start dating his wife?”

Kate’s head snaps up, wide eyes as she shakes her head adamantly. “I didn’t do anything wrong, Wanda and Natasha gave her permission to go out and be single while they were gone. It isn’t my fault really that they wanted to keep me around after. I didn’t…I-” Her voice dies out as she starts shaking, her head falling back to lean against her knees as she tries to reign in the beginnings of a panic attack.

The boy sighs, trying to back track immediately. He didn’t want to make her panic or freak out, just point out a basic difference between the two. “Just because you didn’t mean for it to happen, and just because they kept you around, doesn’t mean that you get to be treated like this or that they expected everything to end up like this. Maybe something else happened and now they aren’t sure where the dynamic is?” Slowly speaking, trying to bring focus back to the normal way these conversations go, Peter lets himself watch a few kids play below them on the sidewalk as he waits for a response.

Kate lifts her head slowly, a confused expression painted across her face as she turns to look at the boy. Her mouth falls open a few times, eyebrows furrowing as she tries to collect her thoughts. A noise of skepticism tumbles from her lips, making her flinch at herself and how pathetic she sounded.

“You’re telling me that you haven’t noticed anything different? Things haven’t evolved in the year or so that you became part of this dynamic? Even if that evolution isn’t something that you want, it needs to be dealt with before it drags you all down.” He turns to her now, a gentle look on his face as he finally notices she’s calmed down and seemingly back to her fix-it mentality.

Ocean eyes squint, a teasing look soaring across her face when a mischievous smirk pulls at her lips. “When did you become so smart? You’re a child.”

He rolls his eyes, running his hand through his messy curls. “Being with MJ has pushed me to learn about things and how to read her emotions.” Trying to push off the real foundation he found, a mentor who has been helping him be a better man for his girlfriend.

The archer sees right through it, snorting as she mocks her best friend. “You’ve been hanging out with Scott and Hope haven’t you?”

He’s laughing, nodding as he shoves Kate away from him. The two taunt and joke with each for a while, giggling and gossiping like normal teenagers as they watch birds and planes fly by.

Ringing interrupts the moment, the two of them laughing even harder when the jarring noise almost makes Peter fall off the ledge.

“If you two are done doing whatever it is that you happen to be doing, I have a mission for you.” The static filled Stark voice almost echoes at the height the two are, bouncing off the glass and muffling against the brick.

Struggling to contain the giggles, the young boy straightens even though his mentor cannot see him. “Yes Mr. Stark sir, we are ready.”

Scoffing, the billionaire’s sarcastic smirk can almost be heard as he attempts to hum professionally. “Good, don’t disappoint. The information has been sent to both of your HUDs. I’ll see you both soon.”

The two of them chug back their drinks, smiles bright as they stand and quickly stretch their legs. Peter’s mask materializes around his head, eyes blinking as he readjusts to the ability to focus. He looks around as Kate’s new suit bleeds out from the shooting glove on her left hand, a mix of nanotech and Uru. The two still can’t believe the suit that was gifted to the CEO, something that must have taken not only a trip into space but months to build. Purple and black in color, shiny as it glows from the magic within its molecules, the suit practically melts against her skin before dark purple glasses slip around her head.

Kate’s eyes blink frantically, working to quickly adjust to the blinking information that shows up about everything around her; a smirk spreads along her face before she jumps off the ledge. “Race you there!”

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“Do you think it was a mistake?” The sentence made you freeze, alcohol blurring your vision and sugar rushing your veins. It wasn’t sudden, you knew that your brother and best friend had been walking on eggshells to not bring up the situation that you’re in but you weren’t ready for such a blunt question. A toe dipping into the endless abyss of water, just a touch to see the temperature, was expected even welcomed because you knew you needed to talk about it. You should have known better. You never seemed to get what you thought you needed—no, instead you were handed what the world believed you would benefit from.

Unsure of where to even begin to answer, you slowly look away from the screen to where the other two sit huddled together. Taking a deep breath you try to settle the sinking feeling in your stomach, the sting of bile crawling its way up your throat at the thought of them asking if one of the three people you love were a blunder. “A mistake?” Your voice is shaky, cracking embarrassingly, bringing a vexed maroon across your face. Something you always hated about yourself was your inability to hide your emotions, your mask only lasting long enough for you to flee judgemental eyes before crumbling into pieces at your feet.

With each movement, awkward and robotic, crinkling of candy wrappers and snaps of pretzel sticks fill the room. No one really knows where to go with the conversation now, the threat of a full blown fight just a few wrong words away.

It’s the blonde who gains the courage to speak up first, hesitant with each word nonetheless. “It…we are not saying that you need to end but you do not think this is getting out of control?”

You are instantly defensive, not wanting to admit to the state of your dynamic. It wasn’t something you were proud of, hiding in the good moments to distract yourself from the bad. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh now, we all know that is a lie. Do not lie to your best friend.” Yelena settles back into the couch, crossing her arms as she mockingly pouts up at you. She is no longer scared of your outburst, knowing that it’s just a way for you to redirect your own frustration.

It surprises you when Carson’s voice rings out, strong and confident. Your younger brother is rarely open to confrontation, and it makes the situation you’re in even more serious to you if he is even ready to speak up about it. “Everyone sees it now, even mom and dad are questioning things. You lasted how many years without them even second guessing where you were going, and all that is going to crumble in a couple months.”

“He isn’t our fucking dad!” Your voice cracks, anger clawing its way up your throat. Glaring at the floor in front of the coffee table, you try to sort through your thoughts quickly but you can’t even decide who you’re actually mad at.

Carson nods, setting the control on the couch next to him as he sighs. He had thought you would be passively defensive, not outwardly offensive with him but he was wrong. The young boy should have known as soon as he brought up your step-father that things wouldn’t be as smooth for him as they were for the widow next to him.

Yelena just raises her eyebrow, rolling her eyes as she watches you seethe. “Do not take it out on him, you know that your anger is not at us so take a moment to breathe.” She’s talking almost as if she would to a child, but for some reason it doesn’t make you angry.

“I don’t know anymore. Okay? Is that what you guys want to hear? I don’t fucking know anymore. Everything is falling apart and everyone is so angry all the time. My life is crumbling, every single thing I thought I knew is breaking. Everything is so tense and I don’t know how to deal with it! I didn’t sign up to keep the entire world together! Okay? I didn’t want this! I am not the one in charge! I signed up to be able to give and do, and become a person that eases the tension in a relationship by just existing as I am. I didn’t sign up to be a smart issue fixer. I sound like a fucking idiot, I can’t fix anything! I couldn’t even save dad, how does anyone expect me to save them? How does anyone expect me to fix things?

The two watch as you stand up, screaming into the room. It doesn’t scare them but the louder you get the more that your younger brother flinches. The blonde agent just sits there, legs crossed as she watches you break down. No matter how much either of them want to reach out to you, Yelena knows better. The moment you realize that you are still in a room with people you’ll dart, flight kicking in as the fight in you sizzles out.

She knows you need this, a moment to feel the pain that you have been bottling up for months now. Everything in your body and mind mixes, memories being dragged into your current world to try and make sense of something that you feel like you lost control of. As much as it pains both of them to sit there and do nothing while you crumble in front of them, they know it’s the best thing for you.

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“The world won’t understand who you are and what you want, but that isn’t something that should cause you to fight this.” The airy, echoey voice grates along the inside of the brunette’s head. Annoyance sinking into her body the moment the conversation diverts to the topic she had been avoiding. She didn’t want to hear another lecture about the future, instead she wanted to be trained like they had agreed upon.

Wanda sighs, frustration seeping out of her body. She wants to reach out and strangle them but she knows that it would be futile. They aren’t there saying these things out of spite or ill intent, but as knowledge. “What if I want to fight it? What if this isn’t what I want?”

It’s like they loved to mock the Avenger, snickering at her as she explained her feelings before shooting down every single thing she wanted. “You don’t really get to decide that Wanda, this isn’t something you can just get rid of. It’s your destiny.” The wide smile on their face boils the witch’s blood, wanting to simply speak it out of existence.

“This doesn’t fit into my plans.” The witch could feel the steel stubborn bricks building in her stomach, something that her parents used to say she had when she was younger. It was always an issue of hers, anytime she wanted something and didn’t feel like she should budge she dug her feet in and built steel bricks.

Wanda watches as they roll their eyes, taunting her as they lazily inspect their nails. “Losing Pietro and your parents didn’t fit into the plan. Losing your home didn’t fit into the plan. Being taken to this country and forced to fight for a side you never believed in that didn’t fit in the plan.” If the Sokovian could, she would strangle the arrogance out of them; absolutely fuming at the mention of everything she has lost in her life. “This..this fits into the plan more than you could ever believe and you need to trust the prophecy.”

A sarcastic scoff tears through the brunette’s teeth before she can stop it, eyes twitching as she works to keep the connection between the two of them through her annoyance. Regardless of how much she despised what she was being told, she knew that she needed to hear it. Preparation was needed, and this was the way she would find it. “Until I once again lose everything that I love because of a foolish prophecy. I have finally built a life that I’m happy with, am surrounded by people who love me for who I am. Is that not the real plan? Is that not what I wanted forever?”

The feeling of a cold finger tilting her head up makes Wanda’s skin crawl, the urge to break the digit off is strong but she resists. A feigned sympathetic look spreads across their face as they coo at the witch. It’s almost believable, but the younger brunette is smarter. She knows they don’t actually care about her, using her to make sure they are safe and able to mold her as needed. This is a strategic survival plan, but she has no other option than to play into it. “Think bigger sweetheart, love is an Earthly thing. You were destined for more than just this planet.”

Wanda sighs, her face scrunching when she feels her magic surge; begging to break free. “Maybe it’s you that was destined for more. I want to spend the rest of my time doing exactly what I’ve been doing. Nothing less and nothing more.”

“If only you could have control over that, but no one can stop this–not even you.” The witch opens her mouth to counteract, complain that if she’s so powerful then why can’t she do something. “No, there’s things out there that even we cannot control and that’s something that we both need to learn to accept.” Their hand reaches up, petting her brunette hair completely disregarding the tense muscles. It’s entirely too much, almost comedical, as if they were baiting an angry bear.

Wanda’s eyes snap open, glowing crimson as she loses control. She knows what they meant, a world that would know who she is destined to be will emerge inevitably and she has to be ready to lose it all. It’s knowledge she understands, grasps fully, but it’s something that she will fight until her last dying breath. The world can try to destroy the life she has created, but it will have to demolish her along with it.

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Watching him pace the floors of his old farm house was always weirdly relaxing to Natasha, knowing that being here meant safety. The two friends tried their hardest to never actually come here unless they knew no one would follow them. “You can’t keep acting like you don’t remember what you were told, it isn’t fair to anyone.” Just like that, it’s less of a safe place for the ginger.

Pouting the assassin stares up at the archer, trying to guilt him into saying sorry for absolutely nothing. “Stop taking someone else’s side, just because she’s your mentee doesn’t denote the fact that I am supposed to be your best friend.” She sighs when she realizes that it didn’t work, the man immune to even her most basic attempts.

The tired man rolls his eyes, rubbing at his face as he bends down to pick up some thrown clothes on the ground. “That wasn’t the reason, nor am I taking anyone’s side. I just simply think that this entire situation is getting incredibly out of con–” The rest of his lecture is thankfully cut off as his three children come rushing into the room, the youngest immediately running circles around his name sake.

The young boy practically becomes a cheetah every time he sees the ginger, excitement making his body vibrate. “Auntie Nat, tell dad that we should get pizza tonight please!” Even as he zooms around his big puppy dog eyes are obvious, and it tugs at the widow’s heart strings knowing she can never say no to him.

“C’mon Barton, don’t be boring! Give the little gremlins what they want!” The ginger drags the youngest boy back, smiling wide at his screeches. Pulling him to sit in her lap, Nat smiles as she hugs Nate as close as possible. She knows that she needs to come around more as she realizes how much heavier he’s gotten since she last saw him. Pushing away the emotion as the speed of his growth hits her, the Russian focuses on the present.

The glare shot her way is ignored, subtly flipping off the older man. He stands up straighter, raising his eyebrow as he stares down his best friend. “Just because they’re here doesn’t mean you get out of talking, you know that right?”

“Are you in trouble Aunt Nat?” Lila’s curious gaze meets the widow’s, and Natasha gulps as she silently curses the young girl’s maturity and sharp social skills. She's too young to be this good at it, but then again so was the widow.

Cooper’s ears perk up at that, the older boy starting to grow into his own and eager for a moment to show off his skills. Even if it is his sister that has picked up the family archery, he has officially started exploring different forms of protection. Taking after another Avenger, the boy has been learning how to fight with shields and weapons made for defense. It's something that his family pokes fun at him for, but he loves it.

The Russian smiles, softening her entire expression as she looks over at the young girl. She needs the conversation to end there, or at least the interest in it from the adolescents in the group. “No sweetie, I’m fine. Your dad just wants to try and get me to talk about things I don’t want to talk about.”

Clint scoffs, rolling his eyes as he settles into the couch and pulls out a menu. “More like talking to someone about something that you need to talk about.”

Cooper groans, flopping back onto the recliner. “Dad we aren’t little kids anymore, you can talk about grown up things around us. Well I guess Nate is a baby.” He snickers when he sees the younger boy gasp.

Darting off of Natasha’s lap, Nate launches himself at his older brother. The two immediately begin to wrestle, tumbling over the back of the chair and rolling around on the wooden floor. Lila rolls her eyes, slipping on her headphones as she tries to ignore the annoyance of the boys. One to always try to act cool around her aunt.

“Figuring out dinner is difficult Clint, and not everyone can just magically do that.” The ginger crosses her arms, slowly receding into herself as she feels the lecture coming back.

The old archer chuckles, jotting down notes on what they would be ordering that night, barely paying attention to anything the other is saying. “You act like food is so difficult. It’s not. You look at the options, and you pick the best one. It’s that simple Nat.” He presents his list arrogantly to the woman, wiggling his eyebrow mockingly.

Huffing, the assassin glares at a scuff on the floor. Refusing to the cocky expression on the other’s face, she denies him another time. “Not when it’s dinner for everyone in the house, not everyone is going to be happy with the same thing everytime.”

Dropping the notepad down on the side table, Clint leans against his knees as he pushes into Natasha’s personal bubble just slightly. “Stop acting like you’re feeding toddlers, it truly isn’t that hard to feed four adults and make sure they all get at least something that will be good for them. I can easily cook dinner for Laura and our kids, you can cook for your group too.”

“Why does it fall on us, huh? You and I should get the opportunity to just sit back and wait for dinner to be finished.” Not one to take a challenge lightly, the ginger drops her feet to the ground to level up with Barton.

Smirking, the archer tilts his head and laughs at the woman. He knows exactly where he trapped her, and he knows that he can use it to his advantage now. “Sometimes you gotta step up Nat.”

“Step up to what dad? It’s just dinner, stop acting like it’s a mission to cook.” Cooper’s crooked grin as he interrupts the competitive moment makes the Avengers chuckle, a split second of relief in the conversation.

Standing, and obnoxiously stretching, Clint uses his body to force the ginger to lose balance and fall back into the chair. “Yeah, well your Aunt Nat isn’t really good when she’s the one in charge of dinner. She’s burned the food the past few times, keeps just trying to order food to replace it.”

Nate's eyes brighten, excitement buzzing through his body as he hears one of his favorite dinner ideas. “Delivery is the best though!”

Nodding along, the father picks up his phone to prepare to call the pizza shop. Pausing, he leans against the table as he takes the minute to look at four of his favorite people. “It’s amazing and fun, but it doesn’t replace a home cooked meal. Sometimes seeing that effort and love put into something so warm means more than something just bought, or picked out. Dinner, and food in general, is an act of love. It’s a way to show someone you care about them, and some days it’s okay to order something to be delivered. It still shows you care enough to get them food, but that extra effort to take time out of your day to plan and actually cook the food is so much better. The food also almost always tastes better. Love isn’t about the money kids, and neither is food. It’s something that your Aunt Nat needs to learn, and it’s a hard lesson to learn but it’s one that everyone has to go through at some point.”

As he finally turns away, lifting the phone to his ear and the kids go back to playing, the ginger’s focus drifts out the window. Thoughts of you, Wanda, and lastly Kate bounce about through her mind as she debates her next move.

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“Are.. you alright kid?” The sympathy in the older man’s voice tugged at your nerves, a tone you know not many hear.

You take your time to answer, debating if you want to attempt to lie. The urge to brush off your feelings and insecurities is strong, especially when you logically know most of them are false, but you know the soldier next to you would never consciously fib to you. “Maybe everyone’s right.”

The question is silent, a man of few words as per usual. His head is just barely tilting up towards you, waiting patiently but pushing you in the way he knows you need to.

Tugging your shirt sleeve down, suddenly hyper aware of everything wrong with you, your stomach flips and gags you slightly. It’s almost like your body is trying to reject opening up, anxiety swarming your nerves and every inch of yourself. “It’s illogical for anything in my life, especially this, to work out. It’s the trend at this point, so why would it change? It doesn’t make sense, and one day I’m going to be forced to choose.” Your voice dies out slowly, your body following as you try to curl up in on yourself.

Bucky’s rough voice cracks the foundation of the wall you had just begun to build, stopping you in your tracks. “Do those people matter? If you guys make it work then really that’s all that matters?”

His question makes you think, the first person to not just point out the entire situation going on to you as if you weren’t experiencing it currently. It made you malfunction slightly since you had mentally prepared to defend your life, or maybe to get angry again. Instead you take a breath, letting the one thought that you shove down the most run free for a second. “Maybe, or maybe we’re just being naive. I don’t want to ever be put in a position where I have to choose. I know what my choice would be, at least in theory, but…it would destroy me. I’m not even sure who I would be after that.”

You watch as he flexes his dark vibranium hand, rubbing at it as if he was cleaning up a smudge. Uncertainty rises in your throat, but he once again lays a heavy hand on your fear. “You’re a fighter, and you have plenty of people that would support you in any way you would need. I would support you in any way you would need.”

You couldn’t help the small smile that pulls at your lips, the normally stoic man always had a soft side for you. It was something that you found pride in, keeping moments like this close to your heart. The relationship you had with the soldier was something that was incredibly important to you, and you knew that he treasured you.

The happiness you feel is short lived as you let his statement sink into your mind, letting it get engulfed by the darkness that sits within you. Turning such a beautiful sentiment into another dagger to dig into the wound that you never let heal, only scabbing over for a brief time before you allow it to be ripped back apart by your mind. “I was never meant to make it this far, never meant to save myself. I’ve known that from the beginning. I’ve been playing in overtime, a dangerous game to play.”

Flashes of nights spent alone, the weight of a loaded pistol in his hand, fill his mind momentarily. Blinking rapidly, the older man tries his hardest to ignore his own memories as his determination to keep you safe overpowers. “You know I disagree with that.”

Rolling your eyes, you lightly shove him. “Just because you disagree doesn’t mean everyone in the world disagrees.”

Stuttering, a moment of disbelief filters through the older man’s mind. He spent so many years under the influence of chemicals and other people, but for some reason he was able to make it through. Not necessarily the best mentally, Bucky survived and is now the happiest he has ever been. He wants to help you, wants to ease your tension and fears but how can he help someone whose brain is miraculously even darker than his.

“Sometimes I feel like the world would end if I didn’t exist, which is really ironic for someone that wanted to die most of their life. I don’t understand living, or joy in the daily world. I never did. Even as a kid I romanticized death and ceasing to exist, it seemed peaceful and ideal. It wasn’t because I thought I couldn’t handle responsibilities or anything, at least that wasn’t why back then, but because I thought that was like my destiny. Ultimately death is everyone’s, in theory eventually, but for me it always felt like I was bound for an early untimely demise ” Chuckling, you can’t help but flourish your words at the idea that played in your head almost daily for most of your life. For you death was only scary when it wasn’t your own, instead you would greet it with open arms for yourself but it simply seemed to never want to welcome you back.

You never thought it was dark, or sad, just the way your life went. The mindset you had didn’t please most people, and you try your hardest to ignore those thoughts as much as possible but it isn’t always easy. As of lately, with everything going on, the world around you no longer is loud enough to drown out your deepest dark romantic thoughts. Instead it sang its grim melody, luring you back into its grasp. “Keeping everything together, things are falling through the cracks and I don’t have all the information. I can’t be the glue anymore when I can’t even keep myself together.”

Bucky eyes flicker around, trying to think of how to answer everything that he had just heard. He knows that you don’t want to hear anything about death, your mind has been made up for years now, so instead he focuses on something he may be able to help with. “Are you the glue because your dynamic falls solely on you and your involvement or because whatever is happening right now is forcing you to believe that you’re the only thing keeping everyone involved in the relationship?”

Your mouth opens and closes, jaw tense as you stew on the words Bucky said. It wasn’t something you ever wanted to think about, a flaw within the dynamic that ultimately fulfilled all your dreams. While you know that most people believe that you saved Wanda and Natasha’s relationship, you don’t like to think that. They would have survived, and thrived on their own, but you do know that you brought a steadiness that they were not used to. Many say that you saved Kate, but in all reality you believe that the two of you saved yourselves to end up together. You didn’t like the idea of being the reason why Kate is thriving, the girl fought her whole life and she deserves the credit for where she is. Pride wells up inside you every time you think about the warrior that she is, and how she truly is a hero. She may never fully believe that, regardless of her god complex, but she is your hero. Everything she ever does is amazing, and leaves you breathless, but you see the anxiety and the hesitation with each movement and decision.

Unbeknownst to you, the soldier next to you was watching you carefully. Analyzing you as you zoned out, a moment of silence between the two of you allowed him to gather his thoughts. He knew that you had a darker side, a part of you that most ignored for the cute loveable layer. It was a fact, but he wasn’t used to seeing it so much. You had been far less bubbly and adorable as of lately, the weight of everything dragging you down and allowing the gloomy side out.

The mostly comfortable tranquility was shattered by your best friend slamming open the stairwell door, the two of you flinching as you turned to her. Her face is frantic, breaking all of her training as she looks around. “Grab your suit, kid, we must go now.” She shakes her head, cutting you off effectively when you go to question her. The look she shoots your way is all you needed to see, jumping over the couch.

Thoughts distraught in your head, you can feel a slight burn along your left rib cage. Rubbing at it you are surprised when your suit starts melting across your skin, realizing that it’s been enchanted. The dark, almost black, suit quickly covers your body and a mask slips over your head. You blink when your vision glows red, purple writing explains everything around you and gives you information on anything that you may need. Looking down at your hands you realize that the mask shows you all the weapons that you have, magically concealed within the belt now around your waist.

You can feel the power surging through you, and when you hear Wanda’s voice echoing through the mask you feel confident. With the witch’s magic protecting you, and her voices guiding you, there wasn’t anything you felt like you couldn’t conquer. “Let’s do this.” Laying your hand on Yelena’s shoulder, you will yourself to be where you need to be. Disappearing, the two of you leave a static filled smoke cloud behind.

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The ginger barely blinks when she sees the remnants of scarlet mist floating in her peripheral vision. “You know, whenever you said you would show up wherever I needed you I never thought that you would really start showing up without my asking for it.”

Wanda settles in the seat next to her girlfriend, sitting sideways so that she can look at her. Letting her legs hang over the armrest, the younger woman rolls her eyes and sarcastically tips an invisible hate towards the widow. “I’m at your service, night and day. Top notch, automatic. We’re all just living in your world, aren’t we?” The smirk pulls at her lips, her eyebrow raises cockily.

It didn’t take the widow much brain power to pick up on the sarcasm dripping from the witch's lips, a bad habit that only grew after the two collared you. The young Sokoivian was never really a sardonic person, just had a mask of confidence, but your bratty side unlocked a part of her that no one could control. “Destined to rule the world and can’t even admit to it being yours, how humble of you.”

“Don’t you own them? Isn’t that what you said? Bishop? Your Toy? Aren’t they our world? You say I’m destined to prevail, but we both know you are awaiting the destruction not the regime.” Wanda picks at her nails, an act that the other woman sees through easily. The younger of the two always had a harder time hiding her emotions, a detrimental issue for her powers.

Natasha chuckles dryly, focusing on the panel of screens as she tries to act unaffected by the other woman’s attempt at baiting her. “Dramatic as usual, if only you left that in the past with the heavy eyeliner and tacky pleats.”

Twirling one of her rings around her finger, the witch’s eyebrows scrunch mockingly together as she stares at her partner. “Are you sure you were trained to be an assassin, you spend more time critiquing my old fashion choices and pining over millionaires than you do actually going on missions nowadays.”

Hitting the display board as she finishes inputting the last bit of information, hitting the button for Friday to take over. “Ah the root of all the problems in the world. Me liking someone that isn’t you. Don’t you think it’s a little ironic that you’re so possessive over me when you’re the one that wanted to open the relationship?” Spinning the chair to look at Wanda, the ginger struggles to keep her anger in check as she sees how nonchalantly the woman is talking about everything.

A taunting laugh falls from her lips, the witch paying no attention to her seething girlfriend as she plays with a small ball of her magic. “Jealousy is a quaint little idea Romanoff, if only such things were of my nature.” Finally raising her gaze to meet the older Avenger’s eyes, Wanda's nose scrunches as she mocks her.

Rolling her eyes, Natasha scoffs as she plants her feet firmly on the ground between the two of them. Leaning in she reaches up to shove the other girl’s feet to the ground, smirking as she stumbles a bit. “Right, you would never be envious of me. I’m not good enough for that, that’s reserved for cocky archers.” Gripping the witch’s chin, the spy forces her face to level with hers; a feeble attempt at gaining the upper hand.

Wanda uses the position she’s in to her advantage, letting her mouth fall open just slightly and softening her gaze. She looks up at Natasha through her lashes, a face she knows the older woman can never say no to. “She’s more than that, but if you want to demote her to such a title; let’s talk about that.” Her voice is light, but the bite is evident as she practically whispers. “If she’s just an archer, why would you care so much about fixing your preposterous reaction? Why would a simple athlete’s feelings matter so deeply to you that you would stoop to the level of the Americans that are just so infantile to you for celebrating a fake holiday?”

The silence is loud, a representation of the ginger’s confidence as it dies out. The witch’s innocent doe eyes hardened and spark up with mischief as she realizes her words were finally cutting deep. Competition was always a strong common ground for the two, even during an argument as both sides push and prod the other to try and outdo them. “Usually you would fill the dead air, Natalia. Most people wouldn’t allow someone to spread such lies about them. Unless they aren’t lies, unless the world was oh so wrong about the heartless Black Widow. Is that it? The idea of your beloved princess and her worthless stray being mad at you gnawing at your black heart strings. The thought tearing at your chest like a black hole. Isn’t it funny that you act so unaffected by everything but really you couldn’t handle the fact that someone put their hands on a moronic mongrel that you couldn’t muster up a single sympathetic word.”

A defeated sigh falls from the spy’s lips, falling back into the captain’s chair as she lets go of the brunette’s chin. “Are you acting out Maximoff?”

Wanda, thriving as she watches Natasha retreat, lets her ego get bigger. Sitting up straighter, posture becoming more regal as she arrogantly looks down on the spy; pride in what she believes is finally a win for her after months of back and forth. “Tell me I’m wrong and I’ll stop. Tell me that you aren’t fighting your own mind daily. Wishing you could slit the throats of those men, wishing you could destroy every single childhood memory of the mutt you fell for.”

“Maybe you’re right, but don’t you think it’s funny that you gave them the reaction they wanted because you didn’t want them to be scared of you. You aren’t soft, and you aren’t loving. You’re cold and calculated. If anyone here is heartless it’s you Maximoff. You are filled with a darkness that even the most evil of men couldn’t fathom, a tenebrosity overwhelming even the blackest of nights.” Even though the words she speaks are harsh, Natasha curls into herself. Backing away from her girlfriend as she tries to reign in anything she might later regret. She knows her training is better than this, but something about Wanda has always made her lose control in every way no matter how good or bad.

Clenching her jaw, the witch can feel the tension brewing inside her body. Her shoulders rigid as she tries to figure out what is about to happen. She doesn’t want to use her magic, instead relying on the fact that she knows the widow like the back of her hand. It doesn’t fail her often. “At least I had a reaction, fake or not. I didn't need to grovel at the feet of a spoiled rich kid. My dignity is still intact unlike yours.”

“You can have dignity, all high and mighty but what will you be left with after that? A fake air of confidence and a mask that sinks so deep that even you forget who the real girl underneath it all is? The girl that Pietro left behind completely gone? Did she die with him?” A sad, almost sullen smile pulls at the corners of Natasha’s mouth as she looks up slowly. Her bright forest green eyes almost look wet with unshed tears, something that would fool most people but not Wanda. No matter how much the widow plays, she knows that she’ll never be able to actually trick the brunette into believing any of her tactics. She had to have known that this was the plan all along, a hit below the belt to get her to back off after she had cornered her. It was dirty, and unkind, but at this point in the game nothing was off the table anymore.

It took a moment for what the assassin said to really sink in, almost lost in the bubbling anger but when it finally hit the world felt cold. Her brother was always left untouched, a memory that she cherished and tended to daily so she would never be without. A thing atop of pedestal where no one could reach, but the Russian had decided to get a ladder and step into a different playing field. “She may have died with him, left in a pile of rubble but at least she was real. Loved and cherished. Where’s the real Natalia? Did you ever know her? Did anyone ever know the real you or did your poor mother sell that off too? What was she worth? Has to be more than whatever we’re left with.”

Bringing up specific things, like her brother or the ginger’s lineage, wasn’t something that Wanda took pride in. The business the two were forced into brought enough opportunities for low blows and deep cuts to hash open, memories of beloved people weren’t something that needed to be tainted. Only stooping low when others decided to, digging a basement for the rock bottom jabs.

Deciding that was enough for the time being, Wanda takes the shocked silence as her chance to disappear. Her knowledge of the one person on this Earth that she truly thought she knew inside and out failed her.

It’s almost entirely silent in the quinjet, even the wind rushing as the ginger flies through the air isn’t heard. The trace of crimson fog lingering in the air as Natasha sits there struggling to breathe, alone once more.

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The world flashed before the two young heroes' eyes, a moment that drew slow for just the duo as they realized that this was no ordinary robbery. Frozen in their spot, an imaginary glue adhering them to the metallic floor, it’s almost like watching television. A deep rooted want to scream out, to heckle the characters on the screen for not moving, but reality slaps them across the face when a terrified scream rings in their ears.

The two young New York natives realize that they are the ones in the show, forcing themselves to move in the heat of the moment. Scattering in hopes to stay vigilante, one step ahead of the masked men who are patrolling the floor. Slipping into a trusty vent, the archer takes a page from her own mentor’s book as she just barely stows away before she’s seen.

Kate’s eyes search out the young spider, something she would chastise herself for later. How could she lose sight of her partner? It was basically rule number one, always know where your allies were. Slumping against the vent wall, she takes a moment to try and control her nerves. The guys below her were familiar but mind bogglingly overpowered, she wasn’t sure where they got whatever weapons from but it wasn’t something in the information sent by Stark. A fact that she would have to remember to bring up to him.

Crackling the young spider’s voice finally breaks through her ear piece, and she looks around trying to find where he is. Finally seeing him in a dark corner across the room, hanging on by his webs, the archer is relieved to hear his static filled voice. The two take a minute, breathing a sigh of relief when they realize they are both safe for the moment.

When an energy beam goes flying by Peter’s face, miraculously not giving away his position, the young boy starts trying to figure out a plan. “We gotta go down before they do anything dangerous, I wonder why Mr. Stark didn’t tell us about whatever glowy stuff they have.”

“I’m not sure he knew, but this bank looks familiar.” Ignoring how the boy starts pestering her, ocean blue eyes scan the area before it clicks. Her company helped service them, and she wiggles gleefully. Slipping a trick arrowhead from the new pack, she waits patiently for a louder noise before stabbing it into the metal near her. Quickly pulling up her watch, a projection allows her to use the B. Tech arrowhead to take over the entire building’s electrical system.

It only takes a few swipes before the entire building’s power shuts down, everything going deadly quiet before the emergency lights click on. The people below, recovering from shock, finally started to search for who was responsible.

“Woah did you just do that?” Peter’s eyes are squinting at the archer as he tries to look at what she’s doing from across the bank.

Kate just giggles, nodding as she swipes through surveillance and vault locks. “My company wired this entire building, I just took this fight back for us. We just gotta be quick.” The CEO rolls her shoulders, closing the blinking projection and motioning out to the spider where she would be going.

Slipping out of the vent, her legs dangling, the archer scans the area quickly before throwing an arrowhead across the room. A forcefield expanding as the trick arrow bounces, blocking off an entire hallway. Immediately giving away their positions, but the element of surprise and night vision on their side. Though the two don’t fight side by side, back to back, the two keep track of one another at all times.

It’s almost effortless as Peter webs up three guys approaching Kate’s back, and the archer takes out a man with a blaster aiming for the spider. It’s a rough fight, the young Avengers not quite prepared for a group of people that can handle the type of weapons that they wield.

The two spend more time protecting, acting on the defense rather than offense. They knew that it was going to be a tricky mission when they realized how many civilians were scattered through the group. Understanding that worrying for others safety is causing them to be on the losing end of the fight.

“Oh spidey boy!!!” The deep voice sings out, mocking the young boy.

Slipping as she hears the voice, Kate loses balance momentarily causing her to miss her target. Cursing herself, the archer quickly takes the target down at the last second and barely saves a young girl. She isn’t sure where her fellow hero is, but she hasn’t been alerted by the AI that there was an issue so she has to assume that nothing is wrong.

“Get your head in the game, Kate.” The more she moves the more she berates herself to do more, swinging around to take down different masked men. Her new bow mindlessly switches between sword and bow as quickly as her own reflexes, arrowheads traveling up her arm and Uru spines extend instantaneously as the sharp point touches it’s rest. The fluid motion in which her new suit and equipment works with her body is mesmerizing, a new extension of her own mind.

She almost feels like a hero now, not just in bravery and attitude but look and technology as well. No longer needing to rely just on her own eyesight and guesstimating, the HUD in the glasses framing her face telling her all the information she would ever need. The pack along her torso was the most amazing part of her new set up, instant arrowheads all controlled by her thoughts allowed for a practically flawless display of her skills.

Every opportunity that she’s had to put this new suit on was something that she could have only dreamed of. Fights have become something almost like a tournament to her, competitive to an even higher max than before as she finally settles into her laser focus. Nothing but her next movements, the next person to protect, on her mind; Kate feels at the top of her game.

A bone chilling scream rings throughout the bank, echoing off the large marble sculptures, making everyone turn to look at the source. There in the center of the room, clutching and clawing at his head, is Peter crumpled in a withering heap. A dissipating green smog floats in the air around his collapsed body, a subtle sizzling sound can be heard through the tense silence. It’s almost like even the masked men weren’t prepared for the reaction they got, frozen in their position.

Scanning his body, the AI in Kate’s ears is practically screaming and rushing her forward to save the boy whose body is rejecting all functions. She’s moving before she can realize it, the edge of her sword sparking as she slides across the stone floor. Coming to a stop on her knees in front of her best friend’s balled up from, she takes out a few men sprinting towards them without taking her eyes off of the man holding a broken tube. Arrowhead and sword in hand, the young Avenger stands to her feet.

Her face is painted with anger and vengeance, even though her suit covers most of her expression, and she barely flinches when the second man in charge comes to stand next to his friend. Tossing the trick arrow to the ground, a force field surrounds the four of them and Kate lets her mask down. “I wanted you to see the face of the girl who is about to destroy you.”

“This is the infamous Hawkeye?” Their laughs bounce against the sizzling electricity, mocking as it echoes in the small makeshift arena. The two men clearly only paid attention to the boy behind the archer, not realizing how much damage that the archer could really do.

“Is this our movie moment? Where we get on our knees and beg a little girl to spare our lives because you’re just oh so powerful.” The two men aren’t even phased as they cackle, joking as Kate holds two arrowheads between her fingers.

Fanning them out, she focuses on how she is close enough to see the veins in their necks bulging as they howl. She wants to seethe, rage overtaking her actions, the need to protect her best friend strong but something feels wrong. The men don’t seem to even care that she’s there, holding deadly weapons, and while the young girl is used to people underestimating her this was different.

Confusion floods her body, almost forcing the confidence that she was feeling out. She doesn’t understand this dreadful cloud that is hanging above her head. This wasn’t the moment to get insecure about her abilities, she had an important job to do which only got more needed when Peter was taken out.

“At least we know what our Love Bug looks like all grown up.” Kate blinks, once and then again as her gaze lifts to scan the man’s covered face. The breath gets caught in her throat as her mind fights against the protective wall around forbidden memories.

Everything is happening all too fast, cracks breaking the foundation of her entire heroic facade. She can’t break now, not here; not in front of them. The blood in her body pumps cold, a stark contrast to the vengeful hot temperature it was seconds ago. Kate wants to move, can hear the AI in her ear urging her to move now while the two were distracted but she can’t.

The second man hits the other on the chest, pointing at the CEO’s body as his disgusting gaze travels downward. “Just as hot as she was back then, honestly I could take another go at her.”

The sentence was muttered, almost under his breath but it was almost like he screamed it to the archer. Her entire body shakes, and her heart begins racing. She wanted to run, to hide under a blanket and pretend like the world no longer exists.

It’s almost like her suit takes over for her, the archer’s knees weak and almost collapsing under her. Forcing Kate’s hand to move, readying to throw the arrowheads, but the two men reach up and slip their masks off. Even though she had realized who they were, their voices engraved into even the deepest of her memories, the second she could physically see their eyes and their cocky arrogant smirks everything crashed and burned. It’s almost like she could still feel the rough messy hair atop their heads, muscle memory trying to shove it away forces her to drop her weapons.

Stepping towards her, even though she’s the same height as them now, they practically loom over her. It’s intimidating as they almost circle towards her, kicking away the fallen sword. Tugging off their gloves, one of them reaches up to cup her flinching face. Calloused thumb rubbing her cheek, so aggressively that it almost leaves a raw red mark, while the other man grabs at her waist. When Kate’s face lowers, sinking in on herself as she attempts to be smaller, the man’s hand leaves her body to tangle his fingers into her hair.

Yanking her head back, the two chuckle at her pained expression. Almost tugging her head back and forth, inspecting her. For the first time in about eight years the young brunette finally raises her eyes to make direct eye contact with the two men who destroyed her life. Hating herself as she searches for the sparkle of the men she grew up with, a glimmer of the people who father trusted most. Mind racing as she figures out a way to win the game, to make sure that they are proud and happy of her at the end of play time.

“Did you miss us, Bug?”

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