#why do we have to keep focusing on food in circles with huge numbers of people with EDs

[fairiencarnate]

I used to love those anti diet posts that were like "eat that cake. eat that chocolate. do what feels good babe" because they enabled me to keep harming my vital organs. Now they make me want to scream bc like girl I would LOVE to. I'm fighting the urge every second. But I would sugar dose myself into a diabetic coma if I just did what felt good. I would bleed myself into iron deficiency if I did what felt good. Doing what feels good would cause some of my favourite organs to stop functioning. It's made me realize... Doing what feels good is a privilege not all are blessed with.

[multi-fandom-inserts]

Show Me Going

Rosa Diaz x Female Reader (If this offends you, don’t read, simple as.)

This is set during the active shooter episode, I’ve changed a few details but just a warning if this subject is a trigger. ENJOY.

Masterlist.

XXX

“Come on Y/N, just a few more bits to fill in.” you mutter encouragingly to yourself, leaning back on your chair stretching out your back and fingers before rubbing your temples furiously in a desperate attempt to refocus on the computer screen in front of you but it was no luck, the new system the IT department had put in place took twice as long for warrants to be processed and approved as well as evidence to be categorised and assigned to cases which meant they take longer than average to fill out.

The atmosphere in the precinct was tense, the usually loud room with buzzing energy and laughter  had fallen silent with nothing but the echoing noises of fingers tapping on keyboards, coffee being drunk and the constant noise of the printer working in overdrive to keep up with the demands drowned out the frustrated groans made by your co-workers.

Everyone had fallen into their own miniature slums, Amy had reverted back to “secret” smoking and chewing the ends of her pens violently – which has caused more than one ink explosion – Terry was working in overdrive to keep everyone in upbeats spirits, running himself into the ground in the process, whilst Charles focused all his energy into waiting hand-and-foot on Jake who had managed to hurt himself more times in the last few weeks than his entire career in the police force and had been ordered to desk duty sorting through old case files as well as the odd open case that crept up, the boredom of which had now caused him to become even more childish and irritating – something the Nine-Nine didn't know was possible – and was currently entertaining himself by creating paper-areoplanes and throwing them around the bullpen.

“Here you go, Y/N.” spoke a voice that snapped you out of your day dream and made the hairs on the back of your neck stand to attention.

Turning your head to the left, you see Rose Diaz, holding two brown take-out cups. She hands one over to you with a smile, you notice your name was written neatly on the side as you take the cup from her with a thank you; the detective watched you as you take a curious slip, she hadn't asked if you wanted a drink but as you let the delicious warm liquid of caramel Mocca fill your mouth, you hum intently.

It seemed like everyone was suffering except Rosa, and you could feel Jakes curious eyes settle on the pair of you as he listened and watched intently as the pair of you interacted. “When you've got a spare minute, could you help me search for some evidence on our case?” Rosa then asks, rather abruptly, also noticing Jakes eyes on the two of you, but from the side she manages to give you a half smile that wouldn't be seen by the prying detective.

You smiled back at her sweetly, “Yeah of course, let me just finish up the warrant requests and I'll be right with you.”

Rosa gave you a short nod and turned back to walk to her desk situated behind Charles who was sat in front of you typing away madly on his computer, from beside you, you could still feel Jakes hawk-like-eyes on you, one eyebrow raised and a stupid childish smile on his face.

“Is there something you wanted Peralta?” you ask in a short tone.

He snapped out of his trance and shook his head quickly, “Nope, Y/L/N. Nothing.” he stuttered, turning back to his computer; chuckling quietly to yourself, you turn back to your computer.

XXX

Twenty minutes later, you huff in annoyance and push yourself away from the desk, abandoning the warrant that won't process in a efficient amount of time and head for the Evidence Room, Rosa had disappeared from her desk ten minutes ago with a blue case file so you assumed she was in there but as you open the door; all the lights are turned off in the enclosed room; stepping in cautiously whilst attempting to feel for the light switch, the door shuts behind you, engulfing you in pitch black.

“Ah shit.” you hiss to yourself, turning swiftly to feel for the door handle but there was no luck, “I knew I should of listened to my mum when she said eat more carrots.”

Suddenly, a hand clamps down over your mouth from behind, muffling your squeak in surprise, instinctively you grab the wrist of your attacker, twisting your body and the arm around putting them into an arm-lock, pushing them against the chain link fence of the airlock.

“I taught you so well,” the familiar feminine voice whispers, immediately you let go of the figure in front of you allowing them to easily turn the main light on, sure enough, you were face-to-face with the beautiful chocolate brown eye of Rosa, who wore a huge shit-eating smirk on her face with pride. You roll your eyes and shove her playfully.

“You scared the shit out of me!” you whisper in fake annoyance, unable to stop the goofy smile creeping onto your face.

Rosa chuckles, taking your hand and pulling you closer, placing a gentle her lips on yours and lingering for a moment before separating, “We agreed we wouldn't do this at work,” you grumble, pulling her in for another kiss, this one more passionately as your tongue glides across her lower lip, asking for access as you deepen the kiss.

Rosa moans into the kiss before pulling your lips apart and hugging you tightly, “I know, but I couldn't sit there and watch you all stressed out and anxious anymore.”

Smiling, you rest your head on the front of her shoulder, inhaling deeply taking in the familiar smell of her perfume, motorbike oil and the leather jacket she wears religiously, “You know they'll figure out we are dating eventually, Jake seems to be on the trail.” you say to her.

You can feel her nod, “Yeah honey I know – but don't worry about that for now, we'll tell them when we are ready.” she assures you, squeezing you tightly before releasing you, “Why don't you get out of here for  bit? Go get some food and fresh air.”

“But we are busy with this case?” you ask her.

The detective smiles, rolling her eyes gently as she cups your chin in her hand, “Go, get out of here... before I get my taser and chase you ouy.” she playfully threatens, kissing you one last time.

XXX

You would never tell her to her face – but Rosa was right, getting away from work and some fresh air is exactly what you needed.

A short drive from work was a small café hidden amongst the busseling city, taking a seat outside you sip on your tea in-between eating your chocolate croissant. Breathing a sign of relief as you watch the city move around you, strangers going about their daily lives, going to work, seeing family, spending the day with loved ones. It causes a sinking feeling in your stomach, Rosa and yourself weren't out in the open with your relationship, you both have witnessed Captain Holt receive abuse because of his sexuality and neither yourself or Rosa were ready to face that in the work place let alone in your personal life.

And sadly, the sinking feeling doesn't stop there, as your radio crackles to life with a message no one in law enforcement wants to hear.

XXX

After you left, Rosa stayed in the Evidence Locker for a while as she really did have some evidence to find relating to the case the two of you were working on, but thanks to the new filing system and the lack of Evidence Attendant workers, it took twice as long to fins what she needed and when Rosa entered back into the bull-pen, evidence in hand, she is greeted with the sight of everyone crowded around Gina's desk with their backs to her.

“What's going on?” Rosa asks but is responded to with sharp, loud hushes.

She's taken aback but then she hears the buzzing static noise of a radio, quickly Rosa joins the half circle around the radio and listens carefully, “There's an active shooter in a hotel in Brooklyn Heights.” Holt tells Rosa, her heart sinks and the rest of the team takes a sharp inhale at the confirmation from their Captain.

“Requesting additional units.” a female voice speaks over the radio.

“Multiple causalities, ESU is en-route and nearby officers are responding to the scene right now.” Holt tells the squad keeping them updated.

Rosa's hands ball into fists, whitening the knuckles as her hands begin to sweat. Jake bits his lip as Amy chews her pen.

“Multiple shots fires, please be aware civilians running from scene and are on the streets.” Dispatch informs.

Charles takes a deep breath and holds it until it hurts before breathing out slowly as Terry flares his nostrils.

“Johnson, 2938, show me going” a male voice speaks over the radio.

“2938, I have you going.” Dispatch confirms.

“Gilbert, 9825, show me going.” another male speaks.

“9823, I have you going.” Dispatch confirms.

“What are they saying?” Gina asks – who had begun to pick at her nail polish – looking up at Captain Holt from her desk.

“Show me going and their badge number, they are telling Dispatch that they are close by and responding.” Holt explains calmly.

“Y/L/N, 2103, show me going.”

Everyone around Gina's desk freezes, the one line was spoken so quickly no one wanted to believe they heard it, until Dispatch confirms.

“2103, I have you going.”

“Y/L/N! As in our Y/N!” Charles shrieks worriedly.

“That's her badge number.” Jake then confirms, looking up at Rosa who looked over to him, the colour in her face had drained, her jaw hung loose in disbelief as her balled up hands began to shake. The squads eyes dart from one person to the next, everyone slowly coming to terms with what they had just heard.

“She's there.” Amy said quietly to herself, but in the silence atmosphere it echoed loudly.

Rosa swallows thickly, her heart beating a million miles an hour, echoing in her head making it pound, palms sweating with an uneasy lump forming in her throat choking her. Without a word, the detective turned sharply on her heels and took off in a fast, brisk walk towards the bathroom down the corridor, bile climbed her throat as her vision starts to blur at the edges.

Locking the main door to the bathroom, Rosa breaks into a sprint for the toilet, barely making it in time before her lunch made a reappearance. For twenty minutes, she stares into the toilet bowl eventually gaining the strength to push herself back up, flushing the toilet and heading over to the sink, gripping the edge of the sink with all her strength, running the water to mask the thick and fast tears that fell from her eyes.

A million thoughts rushed through the detectives head, was Y/N safe? Where was she in the hotel? Is she hurt?

Just as Rosa begins to panic, a loud knock echoes on the bathroom door, followed by Jakes voice.

“Rosa? Are you okay?”

Taking a deep breath, the detective tries to calm herself enough to respond, “Yeah, I'm fine.” she manages before a wave of new tears form.

Jake doesn't believe her, through their training at the academy and multiple cases together, Jake has learnt to read the seemingly emotionally unavailable woman pretty well; and he knows better than to push her as he hears the unevenness of her voice and attempted hidden sniffles.

“Captain is holding an emergency meeting in the Briefing Room in five minutes,” Jake then speaks, not wanting to push her.

Rosa nods as if he can see her, looking at her blood shot eyes, blotchy skin and pale complexion, “Okay, I’ll be out in a minute.” she responds.

Jake doesn't respond, instead he waits. Rosa washes her face with cold water, tries her tears and swallows her emotions as best as she can, unlocking the door she steps out and Jake engulfs her in a bear hug – something they never do often – but as Jake waits for Rosa to shove him away, instead she wraps her arms around him and returns the hug gratefully.

“Thank you buddy.” she mumbles, letting go.

Jake smiles softly at her before turning to walk towards the Briefing Room.

Holt and Terry stand at the front of the room, Jake by Charles, Amy and Rosa on their own tables and Gina stood in the corner. The tension is the room was thick, worry and anxiousness radiated off everyone, even Captain Holt had a nervousness about himself.

“A Captain at the 9-7 has given us a brief update, there's two possible three shooters in Brooklyn Heights – ” Holt started but Jake swiftly interrupted.

“Any casualties?”

“Three head, many wounded – all civilians.”  Holt speaks. “ESU is on scene and the area is being locked down, it's a zoo out there, we have been ordered to stay here on alert but not to respond.”

“That's crazy!” Amy yells.

The room is taken aback by her outburst but Holt doesn't seem fazed, “I know you're all worried about Y/N, but she is not alone, she is part of a massive NYPD response.  I promise I will keep you updated as the situation develops, in the meantime, you all have jobs to do. Dismissed.”

The room clears out, Rosa lingers as Jake and Amy talk.

“She'll be okay, Ams.” Jake comforts her.

Amy smiles through gritted teeth, touching her boyfriends shoulder, “I know. I love you.” she says.

“I love you too.” Jake smiles happily.

That's when it hit Rosa like a bus.

A realisation she never thought she'd have.

A feeling she never thought she'd feel.

She loves you.

XXX

Three Hours Later...

The echoing sound of gunshots rung in your ears, sending glass sparing over you and the officer you are paired with. The heavy bulletproof vest you wear constricts your chest more than the heavy sinking feeling of anxiety that sits in the pit of your stomach, when suddenly an officer in the squad next to yours yells in pain, turning swiftly you see a brief sight of red blood.

“Move! Move! Move!” you yell to your team as more bullets fly through the air.

“Squad Beta-Nine to Dispatch, we are pinned down.” a male next to you speaks over the radio, “Multiple shooters on west side, seventh window up. Do you have a clear shot?”

Your heart beat echoes in your head, white noise takes over blurring out everything else, holding your gun close  you check the bullets, secure your vest and helmet. As the bullets hit the wall you're all barricaded behind, you close your eyes and all you see is her – Rosa, with that stupid smirk she wears, her leather jacket she lets you wear when you get cold, the helmet she hands you when she forces you on the back of her bike.

Oh my god, you suddenly think, your eyes bursting open, “I love her.” you whisper to yourself.

XXX

“GUYS!” Charles screams – despite everyone in the squad being in a two metre radius of him.

“What is it?” Rosa asks, her voice strained.

Everyone gathers round Charles as he twitches from foot-to-foot, unable to stand still, “They just took three shooters into custody. Officers got injured in the action, they don't say how many or who they are.” he tells everyone, a small weight is lifted from everyone but tension still runs through them.

“Call Y/N.” Jake turns to Rosa, pointing at the phone in her pocket.

Amy raises her eyebrow, curious as to why Rosa would call Y/N when she was her best friend, but before the Sergeant had a chance to ask, Rosa already had her phone to her ear, the ring tone rhythmically humming away. “Her phone is off.” Rosa mutters.

“Fuck.” Holt lets slip.

Jakes eyes widen but now is not the time to react to the Captains potty mouth, no matter how incredible of  a moment it was.

Forty-Five Minutes Later...

The bull-pen was silent. No one spoke. No one worked. Everyone sat at their desks, anxious, scared and on edge.

“Listen up,” Holt's voice shatters the void, “I don't have the names of the injured officers, but is Y/N is unharmed, she should be contacting us shortly. Or, if her phone is dead, she might be walking out of the elevator at any moment.”

And almost as if by magic, the elevator ping’s and the door slides open... revealing... Scully holding a meatball sub.

“AH COME ON!” Rosa screams so loud it causes Scully to jump out of his skin, throwing the meatball sub all over the floor spilling the sauce, meat and bread all over the floor.

From the corner, you let out a laugh, “Damn it Rosa, that looked like a good sandwich.” you speak.

The entire room jumped to attention, all smiling, calling your name but before you got a chance to respond to everyone who moved to hug you, Rosa barged through the crowd, sending Jake and Charles flying into the nearby desks as she grabbed your face tightly and kissed you.

The entire room erupted in gasps as you returned the kiss, wrapping your arms around her neck, and when you both pulled apart, everyone in the bull-pen was staring at you, you took Rosa's hand in yours as you faced your boss, co-workers and friends, Jake and Holt had a huge grin on their faces – as did Gina, who insisted on slow clapping – Amy and Terry looked shocked as Charles looked like he was about to faint.

“So I guess the cats out of the bag.” You said with a laugh.

“We are all very happy for you.” Holt said, a soft smile settled on his usually emotionless expression.

The entire squad nodded in confirmation. “I knew you'd been happier for a reason.” Terry winked, punching Rosa's shoulder playfully.

Everyone laughed, it felt incredible not to hide it, the weight from your chest disappeared and you felt out of this world. Rosa squeezed your hand gently. “Y/N why don't you head home and get some rest, it's been a long and stressful day for you.” Holt says, you nod with a small smile, and head over to your desk to collect your things, “Oh, Detective, Take Diaz with you. The two of you deserve a afternoon off.”

“Thank you, Captain.” Rosa says, grabbing your hand again as the pair of you say your goodbyes and leave the precinct.

As the two of you step out into the fresh air, Rosa pulls you into a tight hug, her shoulder quiver slightly, “Hey, babe, I'm okay, I'm back with you.” you assure her, rubbing her back gently.

Rosa pulls away, her arms still wrapped around your waist, resting her forehead on yours, “I love you.” she whispers.

A large grin breaks onto your face, “I love you too.”

[aka-indulgence]

So I wanna get back to writing but I’m not yet ready to tackle the big stuff or asks just yet and i was recommended to write a oneshot/short thing so.... yet again, conversations with @llamagoddessofficial​ brought an idea to life and I’ve been kinda obsessed with it <u<

----

Space.

Vast, hauntingly beautiful...

lonely.

Even though you’re far from alone on this station- there was a huge crew of humans aboard with you- being on a station always left you with this feeling of... isolation.

You were on lone station, far from the planet whence it was launched, circling the star from a distance. There was no obvious motivation for why you were in one right now- living in space has become commodity, just another way of living. But to say you and the crew were living in space “just because” wasn’t quite the correct answer either... a lot of the people onboard were researches, and you were simply a mechanic on the ship.

You’re distracted a little from looking out the window, at the stars, when you hear a little clank from the outside.

You can’t quite see what’s directly out the station from where you are, so you took a few steps further from the edges of the window and lean a bit into it. You can see a metallic leg, blue sparks from a torch... S4-N5 was out there, his eight legs firmly gripping onto the outside of the station while he was making some kind of superficial repair. As he did, he seemed to notice you, as his “skull” turned to the side, his artificial eyes with “lights” as pupils fixating on you. There was a glare so you couldn’t see him completely... he must’ve caught you in his sensors. You give him a little smile and a wave before he turned away from you to focus on the station.

Yes, humans weren’t the only crew members... there were also robots on this ship. They assisted in managing most of the ship to make sure nothing was falling apart, in order, and generally making the humans; lives much more comfortable, doing things that were deemed too risky for humans to do. They were categorized by intelligence, conveniently titled in three levels, at least on this ship. There were the I-1s, which... to be honest doesn’t seem to be “real” intelligence. They just remember what kind of coffee you like, for example, catering to your tastes, delivering things to your room, the roombas and toasters, those guys. I-2s has a more managing role, controlling the locks, the doors, gases, air, and all the calculating needed to keep the station stable. They have an AI, but they were mostly fixed to their programming.

Then there were the I-3s.... like S4-N5.

Much more intelligent than the other two, they’re mostly mobile, can react to things they didn’t originally have in their programming, do tasks, solves puzzles and problems... advanced learning AIs. Affectionately called “big three” by most people since they’ve become... slightly more common than before, they’re one of the most intelligent AIs created. S4-N5 (who you called “Sans” for short that everyone else picked up- “Es Four En Five” was quite a mouthful to say) was a mobile, mechanic robot. He was made to fix the major fixes in or out the ship, with eight legs to provide grip while he was outside to stop him from floating away, and two arms for all the fixing. He had tools stored in pretty much every part of him, including his legs- another reason why he had so many, er... limbs.

He had a head and upper body that looked strikingly similar to a human’s skeleton- despite having thick “bones” and a very rounded skull. Black “sockets” with lights serving as eyes... and a permanent, wide grin on his face. You’re not even sure why it’s there- but then again why did his upper body part have to look like a skeleton? Maybe it was just a design choice to make him less spider-y but... yeah he still looks like a robotic, spider skeleton.

What did S4-N5 stand for again? “Station something something”-?

“Hey how’s it hanging? you’ve been staring out for a while there. What, trying to tan your face?”

Your lips drop into a lopsided grin at the voice, feeling annoyed before you even see his face.

“Hi... Robert...” you turn around, straining your smile, “Yeah, I was just, thinking...”

“Oh yeah? What about?” You took a few steps back when Robert stepped uncomfortably close to you, leaning back on the window. You know the glass is made to endure but you start to play with your fingers looking at him.

“Oh just... hey, do you remember what ‘S4-N5′ stands for?”

“Ugh... the robot bug thing?” Robert’s “charming” smile turned into a frown at the mention, “Why do you wanna know?”

“I was just wondering because I saw him, I- nevermind...” guy probably has no idea...

“Those things don’t matter anyways, they’re probably just a bunch of numbers and codes to track which model and version of the robot is..” Robert made a pout with his mouth, looking like he wanted nothing more than to steer the conversation away from Sans.

“Hey do you wanna know what me and the boys did earlier?”

... Riiight back to him.

But that’s hardly just a Robert thing... everyone on the ship doesn’t really like talking about Sans. They seem to barely want to do ANYTHING with Sans. He has a reputation for being the creepiest robot on the ship, almost entirely silent, walking around with his eight legs like a giant spider, with that upper “skeletal” body with the grin that now that you’re thinking about it again may be so he’d look friendlier... instead doing the opposite.

You tune out of him for a while as he regales you with something stupid he did on the ship that has you wondering how he even got assigned to this station when you perk your head at the sound of the air-lock door hissing open, the sounds of metal clinking against metal.

“-and ah fuck, speak of the devil. You talk about him and there he is.”

You turn around and see Sans as the doors close behind him in all his glory. Standing almost at twice your height, a shiny, metallic spider. His legs resembled knives, sharp with pointed joints, dividing a leg into three parts. His plated “abdomen”, equipped with machinery, energy storage, and a compartment for supplies suspended above the legs, holding up his torso.

You knew those legs are for mobility, grip, and tools, while the abdomen served to keep all of his body parts in check... but even you had to admit his likeness to spiders could be a bit unnerving.

“Ugh, look at that thing...” Robert whispered to you, as if Sans would take offense to whatever he was about to say, “he’s so fucking creepy, c’mon, why don’t we go somewhere else?”

He looked like he was about to take you by the arm before you jerked away from him.

“Why? He’s just doing his thing, he’s not made to hurt us, just relax!” you hiss at him. You knew Sans could be pretty creepy to some people, but he’s just being childish right now.

“Are we looking at the same thing? I- look, now it’s staring at us,”

You took a glance behind and sure enough, Sans was facing you, with only his head turned to you. You saw how his “pupils” focused, fixating on the nearby humans.

Is it just you or did his eyes look.. more intense than usual..?

“Do you see that? It looks like it’d fucking kill you in your sleep, don’t go out the ship with it (Y/n), it’d probably snip your tether, sadistic fuck.”

“What is wrong with you? He’s just doing his job can you just leave him alone?” You knew Sans was an AI but... it just felt wrong to be talking about him that way in front of him.

“What, because he’ll listen to me?” Robert scoffed, before his definite scowl turned into something less confident. “... actually yeah I don’t like that, so come on let’s go get some food or something.”

“You can go ahead and do that, I...” think of something think of something, “... need to go to the supply room for a moment. I think I’ve got something to fix and I’d rather finish it now rather than later.”

You walk on ahead without letting Robert reply, hearing his slightly distressed sounds of frustration.

“I- ok fine, I’ll be in the cafeteria.”

You hold your sigh until you get into the supply room, for once wishing you had a task to do as you look at your E-Pad.

One lose pipe at Section 8... least priority... what’s is it I need...

You don’t really have to do it, it’s hardly a human-specific maintenance job, but you didn’t want to just be hanging around outside while you wait for Robert to clear out of the cafeteria, because you’re starting to feel peckish.

Your mind goes a bit blank, staring at some spare pipes in front of you. You pick them up with no real intention in your mind, your mind just throwing around the word ‘pipe’ in your head and your hand just grabbed the nearest thing related. It was mostly quiet in the room, aside from the sound of air flowing out of the ventilation system and providing white noise in the background. You completely lose track of what you’re doing, just killing time in the most useless ways possible when...

Clink. Clink.

You hear... Sans’ legs clanking around outside. Something about the sound makes you go still, gripping tighter onto a pipe that just so happened to be in your hand. It was slow, deliberate movements... your heart rate quickened. Something about that quiet noise, sounding so loud when the room was so quiet felt you with this primal dread. You could hear your heart beating in your ears.

He was approaching the door...

Why were those legs so chillingly horrifying to you sometimes?

... No no, it’s ok he’s just... walking by...

The clanging stopped right outside the door while you bore holes into the pipe with your stare. keenly aware of Sans’ movements.

...

The hissing of the sealed doors opening almost makes you jump out of your skin, goosebumps suddenly breaking everywhere all over your skin as you make the mental note that: Sans opened the door.

As he steps inside, those quiet, tapping noises... you shake off your discomfort, ignoring the uncomfortable chill climbing up your spine the closer he sounds.

You said it yourself earlier. He’s harmless, he’s just doing his job... probably needs to take something. You’re in the supply room, remember? He may be a robot but treating him like he’s a monster just didn’t sit right with you when his sole purpose is to keep the ship intact.

You mess around with the pipes some more, trying to make it look like you’re busy gathering supplies, or something. He’s probably come to get supplies himself, he always resupplies the spares in his abdomen for future fixes before going to neutral mode.

You hear his movement doesn’t stop, every step he makes sounds like a whole second, and he keeps coming closer and closer and closer... until he’s directly behind you.

You sweat a little, the proximity making you a bit nervous, feeling like you’re being scrutinized.

He’s completely silent, and the silence stretches on longer than you’d think... what’s he doing? His shadow fell over you, unmoving, stationary. After a while you couldn’t stand it and turned around to see what he was doing-

Squeaking a little when you saw he had bent down so he was at your eye level, finding yourself face to face with him.

“O-oh hey Sans!” You greeted him cheerfully, though your heart threatened to leap out of your chest just a second earlier.

“Hello, Crew-Member 55.” He tilted his head to the side a bit, like he was confused by your reaction.

“I’m... sorry, you surprised me, I didn’t think you’d be that close. Did you... need anything?”

You’re so close to him that you could hear his eyes as his pupils widened and narrowed, focusing on you, see all his individual “teeth” of his, looking like a big, wide cheshire grin.

“... tool set complete.” He says, one of his automated responses. “It seems that you need something, 55. Do you require assistance?”

You looked at the pipe still clutched into your hand and drop it back into the latch. “I... yeah, actually. There’s a... a loose pipe in section 8, can you help me get the tools I need?”

“...” Sans tilted his body back, and you could hear again the whirring in his eyes as he focuses.

“... no tools required.” he finally says, surprising you a bit. “I can manage it for you, 55. You do not need to fix it.”

“Huh?” You checked your E-pad, and sure enough, the task was labelled as “taken by S4-N5”.

“Oh.. thanks Sans, you didn’t have to do that.” you smile at him, and... was it just you or did his grin widen a bit?

“I’ll uh... leave you to that then...” you slip out from the end of the room he had you cornered in- not going to lie, being trapped by a giant metallic spider didn’t seem very comfortable to you. His head faced you the entire time, his head turning 180 degrees. You almost rushed outside a bit to escape his gaze, but then you stop right at the door.

“Oh Sans, can I ask you a question?”

He’s silent. You take it as a ‘yes’.

“I... haha, sorry I forgot... what does S4-N5 stand for?”

“Station 4, Neurocognitive 5.” He responds as soon as you’re done speaking. “Station 4 refers to the station I am assigned: a star revolving station. Neurocognitive refers to my AI: Cognitive. I don’t have real neurons, however I am named so because I simulate one. Was that clear and concise, 55?”

You stagger a bit, for some reason you had.. human expectations for him? You didn’t think he’d reply you with such a detailed explanation of his name.

... you smile at him.

“Yes it was. Thanks, Sans, I appreciate it.”

“A pleasure, 55. Have a pleasant day.”

Of course, his response was robotic but... he is a robot. And... maybe you’re anthropomorphizing him a little but it sounds like he had emotion saying it.

You come out with a little spring in your step. Guess you’ll just check the cafeteria... if Robert’s there you can just go to your crew room and wait him out there. At least you didn’t have anything to do today.

You hear the sound of Sans shuffling around the supply room, probably getting what he needed to make the maintenance before he shuts the door. You hear him stepping away from you to Section 8. You hear another door open, his metallic legs coming to a halt.

“Oh hey whoah- hey!” You hear Robert’s voice, startled, staggering back to the door. You hear Sans skitter back as well, much faster than you heard him walking earlier.

“Please step away.” His voice, suddenly much colder and robotic sounded. “Please step away.”

You turn around and see Robert grasping the toilet door (guess he hadn’t immediately went to get food), trying to make as much space as he can from Sans, while Sans was pressing himself to the other side of the corridor, his eyes... much sharper than you saw them before. They looked almost.. hostile(?).

“Man I’m trying- move!”

“Please be at least 1.5 meters, or 4 feet away. Please be at least 1.5 meters, or 4 feet away.”

Everything becomes static again as you focus on what Sans is saying.

Please be at least 1.5 meters, or 4 feet away.

"This is a safety precaution. Please step away.”

...

You were much, much closer to Sans when he had you trapped in the supply room.

[innovationshealthwellness]

Don't Wish For It

http://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/ad/2b/12/ad2b12bba16d8b9d5e729fdff21e37ec.jpg

Posted by Heather Parker – Work. #Fitness #Motivation #Inspiration

5 Pro Tips on How to Get Motivated to Workout

We’ve all experienced it at one time or another– a precipitous lack of motivation to work out. In this quick guide 15 top trainers, strength coaches and fitness superhumans stop by to share their best strategies for staying motivated to exercise.

Whatever your goals are in the gym you full well know the struggle: it’s minutes to go until you are supposed to hit the gym, and you feel any and all workout motivation plunging through the floor.

While every person’s level of ambition in what we want to achieve in the gym varies, we all experience the same difficulty in getting things going so that we get through the doors of the gym. We look at our fit friends on social media and their incessant #fitlife hash-tagging and gym selfies and wanna punch em, if only because they are at the gym and here we are, sitting on the couch wondering if crushing two bags of Doritos in one day is next level shame.

Luckily, today we got some serious back-up for you. 15 of the top trainers, strength coaches and fitness professionals stopped by to share their favorite tips and strategies for unleashing a bottomless pit of motivation to crush your workout routine.

1. DO IT YOUR WAY.

Social media can be a real son of a bee sting. Sure, it helps us stay in touch with friends and family, but it also shows us the endless trove of workout pictures from our gym addict friends, which tend to make us feel even worse about ourselves. And so we try to do what they do.

First mistake, bucko. Odds are you already know what works best for you.

“I think the most important part about motivating clients is to let them lead the conversation,” says Kelly Gibson, CPT, of Kelly Athletics.

“They know what works best for them, they just need someone to hear that they understand and support their beliefs. Once there is a mutual understanding, it is a good time to introduce clients to ideas of what foods and exercises might help them on their path.”

Remember: we all respond differently according to interests, exercise history, and everything else that goes into making us a special little snowflake. Embrace your individuality and stick with what you know that works instead of trying to emulate what someone else is doing.

2. WHAT YOU WANT VS. WHAT YOU WILL LOSE.

Much of the time we are motivated by fear. We don’t want to lose our health, our youth, our strength. And so we become very loss-averse instead of focusing on trying to achieve things.

Scott Abel, physique transformation specialist and weight-loss expert who has four decades of experience working with bodybuilders, pro athletes and figure competitors, emphasizes encouraging clients and athletes to pursue goals instead of trying to avoid the things they don’t want to have happen.

“The rationale is simple,” says Scott. “What you focus on, expands. So if you are always focusing on what you don’t want, you just manifest more of it that very thing.”

Instead of getting stressed out over negative goals, set yourself some positive targets and goals to dish out punishment on when you step into the gym and drop the hammer on your workout routine.

3. SURROUND YOURSELF WITH PEOPLE DOING THE STUFF YOU WANNA DO.

Like it or not, we are products of our environment. The friends we surround ourselves with end up influencing our actions and behaviors often far more than we are willing to give them credit for. This can be an awesome thing, or you know, be the other way around.

Dr. Joel Seedman, CSCS, ACSM, FMS, of Advanced Human Performance echoes this sentiment when it comes to choosing your coach or trainer.

“There’s nothing that stifles motivation more than a trainer who doesn’t care and lacks passion as this has a tendency to rub off on the client as well,” says Dr. Seedman.

“In contrast enthusiasm from the trainer and coach is very contagious and does wonders for sparking motivation from the client.”

We all have those friends who will tug at your sleeve and whisper, “It’s just one workout, what’s the big deal?” They might be fun to hang out with, but if you are looking to dial up your workouts it might be time to dial down the time you are spending with ‘em.

4. BUILD AN AWESOME SUPPORT CIRCLE PART 2.

Seriously, it’s crazy how much certain people in our lives can push in a certain direction.

Build an inner circle that is all positive, all caring, and all awesome. We are products of our environment.

“No one cares how much you know until they know how much you care,” says Mike Boyle, who for the past 30 years has worked with Olympians and pro athletes including players from the Boston Red Sox and Boston Bruins. “(As a trainer) if you want motivated athletes, care about them as people. Know their story, their why.”

Sounds good to me, Mike.

5. MOTIVATION COMES FROM OVERCOMING ADVERSITY.

If you are training on your own, make sure that you are constantly setting the bar just a little bit higher. Otherwise, you are inviting burnout and boredom.

Motivation, the white-hot, scorching type, comes from seeing your work pay off. From improvement. From overcoming challenges and limits.

Steve Whiteside, BA Kin, B. Ed, CSCS, NSCA-CPT, knows that the key to keeping his clients pumped up and interested over the long haul “involves an aspect of struggle.”

“It may be as simple as increasing the number of push-ups that can be accomplished in a set, going up in weight on a certain exercise or completing a tough metabolic challenge such as sprints,” says Steve.

“When the client completes the challenge, it becomes a high point in the workout and leaves them feeling hugely successful,” he adds.

“If they don’t, they’ve probably come close enough to keep them motivated to conquer it during the next workout. This ensures that each workout is a memorable and worthwhile experience, and that they are continually striving towards improvement.”

[nerdierholler]

OC Interview Questions

I was tagged but @heraldofwho​ (thank you!) and I’m tagging @slothssassin​, @katajanokka​ , @dickeybbqpit​, and @bronzeagelove​ plus anyone else who just wants to!  I’m going to go with post-Trespasser Ithlen, because I miss her.

In a camp, somewhere near the Teviner border with a small band of scouts from the former Inquisition.

name ➔  Ithlen Lavellan Mahariel are you single ➔  There’s a sad smile, “Yes, I am.” are you happy ➔ Happy as I can be, given the circumstances. When your work consumes your time and identity, happiness can be hard to define. Things are going well, plans are being made, and I still have the luxury of enjoying the small things in life. are you angry ➔ At the moment, no. In general, sometimes. It’s always there under the surface, anger about the way parts of my life have played out, the reasoning leading up to our current state of affairs, the fact that I have once more taken on another seemingly impossible task that few will fully comprehend or thank me for should I be successful. It’s too easy to be consumed by those thoughts, and there have been times in my life when that has been the case. I try to stay focused on the task at hand these days. are your parents still married ➔ Still? They never were. I wonder how much different my life would have been had they been allowed to. The world might be a very different place as a result.

More under the cut!

NINE FACTS

birthplace ➔ Brecilian Forest, Ferelden hair color ➔ black, with an increasing number of grays mixed in. eye color ➔ gray birthday ➔ late fall mood ➔ Tired, always tired. Other than that, content I suppose. gender ➔ female summer or winter ➔ Summer. It probably goes back to growing up in the forest. Summer was a time of plenty. Long days where you could get so much done and still have time to enjoy yourself after. Winter was a time of patience. Watching food stores, being even more careful stalking prey, cooped up crafting or weaving in the aravels to pass the time. I liked the soups and storytelling around the fires with warm mugs though.

morning or afternoon ➔ Morning. Get up, get going, hopefully get enough done to enjoy a little break for tea later.

EIGHT THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE

are you in love ➔ I...don’t know. ‘It’s complicated’ would be the understatement of the age. But there is someone out there I care very much about and who weighs heavily on my mind. I’m not sure I’d call it love, but it’s something. do you believe in love at first sight ➔ For myself, no. I’m much too practical for that. I’m also so focused on my work that it’s usually the last thing I would ever think of when meeting someone new. who ended your last relationship ➔ We both did, him maybe more than me. We were heading down different paths, though at the time I had no idea just how different they really were. have you ever broken someone’s heart ➔ *She sighs* Probably, when I was very young. I didn’t mean to and we both thought I might change my mind some day. I loved Tamlen, just not in that way, and I’m not exactly sure how he felt about that. It wasn’t something we discussed. I know we were expected to marry and he was more at home with that than I was. are you afraid of commitments ➔ Not at all, although some may look at the patterns of my life and say otherwise.

have you hugged someone within the last week? ➔ This week? No. But it depends on the week and who I’m with. There are times where I may hug several people in a day quite happily. have you ever had a secret admirer ➔ It’s very likely, though no one has ever approached me or sent me mysterious notes and gifts if that’s what you’re asking. have you ever broken your own heart? ➔ Yes. *the word is barely a whisper*

SIX CHOICES

love or lust ➔ I don’t see why it can’t be both, but if I have to pick one, love. Even if we aren’t in a romantic relationship, we still need love, and there are so many kinds of love. Love is important. lemonade or iced tea ➔ Neither. Hot tea is my preference year round. cats or dogs ➔ I’ve had wonderful companions of both over the years. My current situation prevents me from having either with me, but I always stop to visit with the friendly ones when I’m on my travels.

a few best friends or many regular friends ➔ A few best friends. Apparently I have a long standing reputation for being distant. It’s not entirely untrue, but I have my reasons for keeping most people at an arm’s length. wild night out or romantic night in ➔ I can probably count the wild nights out I’ve had my whole life on one hand and haven’t had one in well over a decade. Romantic night in is my choice. day or night ➔ I don’t quite understand what I’m choosing here, but day I suppose if only because sometimes unpleasant things lurk in the quiet dark, especially when we’re alone.

FIVE HAVE YOU EVERS

been caught sneaking out ➔ Caught leaving to go do something I wasn’t supposed to be doing, not that I can recall. Gotten caught after the fact? Frequently when I was growing up.

fallen down/up the stairs ➔ Are there people out there who haven’t? Not to mention, I lived in a keep for 10 years, anyone who says no is lying.

wanted something/someone so badly it hurt? ➔ So many things. And I’ve learned that sometimes that hurt never fully goes away. wanted to disappear ➔ Many times, sometimes just to avoid getting in trouble with the Keeper, but there are still times where I want to wander away and stop being the person everyone is depending on. If I really wanted to, I probably could, but I’d never be able to look at my reflection again.

FOUR PREFERENCES

smile or eyes ➔ Both. shorter or taller ➔ Most people are taller than me so this one’s not that difficult. But to tell the truth, it doesn’t matter much to me.

intelligence or attraction ➔ A pretty face can only take one so far if there’s nothing to talk about and all you end up doing is staring at each other for hours. hook-up or relationship ➔ Relationship. Hook-ups are not in the best interest of a person in my position, but that’s also just not who I am. I’ve always been too serious about things like that.

FAMILY

do you and your family get along ➔ I've never had a family in the traditional sense. Growing up I got along well with the clan and those in it. Then the wardens were my family and it’s always a good idea to get alone with one’s commander. Seriously though, I was proud to oversee those men and women. The Inquisition was a messier family, I think that’s usually the case when politics get involved. There were good people there, but it was a huge organization and it’s probably best that most have a little more space now. would you say you have a “messed up life” ➔ Surprisingly, no. If you list the many turns my life has taken, I suspect most would say it is, but it’s just life to me, and the only kind I’ve known for a very long time. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone else though. have you ever ran away from home ➔ No. In fact the Keeper practically had to throw me out to get me to go with Duncan. I’ve had to leave homes since then, but I’ve never run away from them.

have you ever gotten kicked out ➔ I wouldn’t say she kicked me out, but the Keeper was very firm in her insistence that I join the Grey Wardens. In fairness, I would have died, or worse, if I hadn’t.

FRIENDS

do you secretly hate one of your friends ➔ No? Is that a thing? do you consider all of your friends good friends ➔ Yes. I keep a small circle of friends and they are all close. who is your best friend ➔ Leliana and Nate. Though now I’m usually out of contact with both for longer periods. I miss them terribly.

who knows everything about you ➔ See my previous answer, though Leliana probably edges out Nate just because she’s Leliana. It’s to be expected when you choose to have one of the best spymasters in the world as your best friend.

[sooghostwriter]

Iliada

Pairings: Do Kyung Soo x OC

Genre: Mature,  Romance, AU, action, Bad guys and secret agents,  Smut in this chapter bb! and a bit of fluff too. 

Warnings: Kyung Soo is not a good guy, mention of violence, bad language

Summary: After a long and hard assignment, Yoon Suji is sent to a new mission that involves less violence but needs a lot of acting. Do Kyung Soo has one of the biggest drugs rings in South Korea, but police haven’t been able to get him. They need proof that he is the one in charge and Suji is the one sent to get them.

She has the freedom to decide how is she going to get his trust.

Chapter 5

April 2nd to April 3th

Under her sweater, she was wearing a light t-shirt that kept her skin away from the itchy wool.

 “Take that off too” He ordered again. Suji followed his instruction, acting out a nervous shaking of her hands and a worried stare, and was left only in her sports bra. 

“Now get under the covers and lay there” Suji nodded and quickly got inside the bed. Kyung Soo walked inside his wardrobe and Suji could see him take off his suit, and put on his pajama bottoms. 

“Calm down, we are not fucking…only…well, you will see” He told her, his voice less serious than before.

Suji couldn’t avoid feeling a bit disappointed. This could have been really good for the mission.  

She didn’t know what was going to happen, and the uncertainty annoyed her. After five minutes, Kyung Soo was back, wearing pajamas, glasses and no gel in his hair. He turned off every single light in his room and got into bed saying no word. Suji waited for him to make the first move.

“Now, if you excuse me” Suji saw in awe how Kyung Soo got really close to her, and just cuddled in her chest passing his arms around her waist, resting his head on her breast.

His skin was cold and his breathing irregular. 

“Are you going to stay there like a dead fish?” He asked, exasperated. 

“Sorry?”

“Do something with your arms” Suji was taken aback. What he wanted was some sort of tender care. Simple cuddling.

She could do that much. It was like hugging a pillow or a big dog right?

Decisively Suji brought him closer to her body, hugging him and giving him what he was asking for. He didn’t speak again, he didn’t even move. A moment later, Suji realized he was asleep and a little later she followed him.

April 5th to April 6th

The morning Kyung Soo woke up next to Suji, he wondered what made him different from her last boss.

And now, a day later, he found what was different.

Suji was the one there, inside his room. She wasn’t there for work, but something else. And she didn’t back up. He was sure that if she wanted otherwise, she would have kicked him in the crotch and run away. But she didn’t. She hugged him close and allowed him to have a nice sleep, without remorse. In fact, when he told her that having sex wasn’t in his plans, he could have sworn that she got a bit disappointed. But maybe that was a bit too greedy of him.

Suji didn’t say a word to Kyung Soo about what happened. The next morning she woke up at the same time he did, they got up at the same time and she went back to her room through the back window. It wasn’t awkward, but they acted as if it didn’t happen.

Still, Suji was happy. She would have to press a couple of buttons and she will be inside his circle. She could feel it.

Chanyeol could eat his words.

She was already developing a plan in her head. It was flawless. She will take advantage of the soon coming holiday. Everyone at the house will leave for the week. Kyung Soo will stay there, playing with his dogs or any of that crap he does by himself. And she will stay there with him.

Checkmate.

And again, Suji thanked the stars for her luck. Just when she was getting ready to go and clean his room she heard a sound outside her room. The voices were unknown, so she got on guard immediately. She looked outside her window and found two guys. Her mind worked fast, she recognized them. Two of Do’s workers. She couldn’t quite remember their names, but the faces were very familiar. She sharpened her ear, listening to their words. The fact that they were outside her room talking in a low voice caught her attention.

“Kyung Soo gave me the number of the account, I should take one million, but I’m planning to take a bit more…you know, personal expenses”

“Do it! You deserve it. That bastard makes you work way too hard, way too much, and pays a misery, fuck it, take three million, one for him, two for you” They ended the conversation with loud laughs and walked away.

That was weird.

She couldn’t catch the entire conversation, but why talk about it there? inside the household, and close to a window. Her window.

Another trust test.

And she will bite the bait.

                                  ≠

“Sir, may I have a word with you?” Kyung Soo recognized Suji’s voice from behind the door and smiled to himself.

Someone had bit the bait. 

“Come in” Suji walked inside with confidence, something that always got him, and sat in the chair in front of him, looking serious. 

“I was about to leave my room and go clean yours when I heard voices” He faked interest, leaning on his desk, crossing his arms and inviting her to keep talking. 

“When I looked outside my window, I saw two guys outside my room, I guess…two of your guys?”

“Sure”

“Ok, well, they were talking about an account number, and three million, one for you sir and two for them”

“I see…why are you telling me this?” Suji’s surprised look was what he was waiting for. Fast, her eyes focused again, and her brows met in the middle again. “

I thought you should know it”

“You’re snitching?” He was incredibly amused by Suji’s expressions. She kept them under control, but still, they showed what she was thinking. At least what he thought she was thinking.

“No sir, my loyalty is with you, if I see something, I say something, especially if it involves someone saying that bastard, when they refer to you” Suji’s words sank hard in Kyung Soo’s head. He planned all that so he could have a last verification of trust. He still had some remaining doubts, but Suji’s words were overflowing with commitment. 

“Thank you Suji, I will see what is going on…it’s good to know that I can trust you” He kept his stare fixed on her face, looking for a sign of alarm, a twitch of her lips, pupil dilatation, nervous hand movement, but he saw nothing. Only her serious face. 

“One last thing sir…this weekend, may I stay here working? I know Miss Dada was going to stay, but she has a family and all that”

“Talk with her, if she is alright with it, I see no problem”

“Good, sir” Suji stood up, ready to leave, and he saw a chance to try something “I will stay here during the holidays too, Miss Park”

“Then I will be taking care of you next week”

Kyung Soo didn’t ignore her flirting tone.

April 10th

Suji was finishing up her weekly report. There wasn't too much news, but it was her way to keep everything organized, and in that way also her boss and teammates could be actualized with the case. After lunch, Chanyeol had arranged a web conference with Jongdae. Suji wanted to talk about some things regarding Kyung Soo and how could she interpret the cuddling in his bed situation. 

“Well…when it comes to cuddling or hugging, is always a way to look for protection or comfort, now, the fact that he asked you to take off your t-shirt and only your t-shirt, can give us a bit more of information…the skin to skin thing…it shows a search for intimacy, but at the same time it puts him in a very vulnerable situation”

“My theory about remorse…can it be correct?”

“I think it is. Probably that time he did something that made him feel full of regret, maybe something that he didn’t like doing, Now, the fact that he seeks for comfort in your persona, allowing you to get in to his bed, and sleep with you, which is when all our guards are down, tells me that he trusts you. Someone as careful as him, as analytic as he is, will never make such a huge mistake”

“What should I do now?”

“Take advantage of what you have in front of you”

She didn’t need to hear that twice.

April 19th

Suji found the first big problem since she got inside the house. With all the cooks on vacation and none of her co-workers there, she was in charge of breakfast, lunch, and dinner. And she couldn’t even toast bread without burning it.

She never learned how to cook. She never had the interest, never needed it. Supermarkets had everything ready for her. It was idiotic to occupied space inside her head remembering recipes when she could get frozen food.

But now, there was no frozen food. Only raw material. She pulled out her computer and searched for breakfast tutorials. Maybe she wasn’t a good cook, but she knew how to follow rules. In less than 20 minutes she had a full Korean breakfast ready.

Kyung Soo had breakfast in his office, lunch in the dining room and dinner in the kitchen, with her. Her intentions to get into conversation were futile. He was vague and obviously nervous.

A little bit past midnight Suji was memorizing new recipes for the rest of the week, craving some midnight snack, like potato chips or Ice cream with cream on top. They probably had nothing like that at the Do’s household, but she could try it.

She went outside her room, without caring about making noise since she was all by herself in that part of the house.  She looked in every cabinet and found nothing similar to her cravings. Not even a bar of chocolate. And her body was asking for some sugar and carbs. 

“Suji, are you looking for something?” She didn’t even flinch when she heard his voice. She was already used to his low tone, and the fact that it caught her by surprise several times. 

“Yeah, some real food for example”

“There’s a lot of real food in that cabinet over there and in the fridge” Suji didn’t have to fake an exasperated sigh 

“I know, but not the kind of food I need, I need carbs, complex carbohydrates, and sugar, refined sugar, you have none of that”

“Not really, you see, I’m planning on living a long life, hopefully with a healthy heart”

“Very funny, is not that I’m planning on killing myself, but my body needs that kind of fuel once in a while” She saw him walk outside the kitchen and came back with his phone. He moved his fingers over the screen and then brought it to his ear. 

“Goodnight, I would like to know if you make delivery…ok, then would you bring…” He stared at Suji, telling her to make the order. She listed what she wanted, and he repeated it to the person on the other side of the line. Suji didn’t feel ashamed about her order, not even when she compared it with Kyung Soo’s single bowl of ramen. 

“Are you pregnant or something Miss Park?”

“Not at all sir, I just tend to have cravings” 

“Oh, well…I didn’t know that, we don’t have any of that food here, I’ll tell one of the cookers to add some of those things to the list from now on” It didn’t surprise her how nice he could be. She already knew that he was a very caring person, of course, only with the people he works with.

Their order arrived 30 minutes later. And Suji volunteered to go and pick it up at the main gate. He waited for her in the kitchen, sitting at the small table next to the dishwasher. Her night menu consisted of a cheeseburger, a portion of potato chips, a Sprite and a Lava cake. Kyung Soo was rather amazed by it. 

“I feel sorry for your dentist”

“It's not like I always eat like this. Only when I’m on a…only when I’m working” She almost said a mission.

Idiot.

She bit the inside of her cheek as a punishment. He didn’t realize it, but still, she did it, and it angered her. No mistakes were allowed. Never.

But either way, she wasn’t lying to him. Always under the pressure of work, she would eat any kind of crap. The high consumption of carbs happened always during missions. Her body and brain worked too much, and carbs and sugar were the only things that gave her energy. And on vacation, she would detox her body with fruits, tea, and water. She knew very well how her body worked. 

“And you exercise a lot too” Of course he knew that. The bastard followed her and probably knew her training schedule. But she shouldn’t know that. 

“I do exercise a lot…how do you know?” Kyung Soo gulped twice, looking a bit caught in the spot.

 “Well…I can tell by looking at you”

“I do exercise. Running, kickboxing and some weight lifting, not too much, enough so I can break a nose with my fist” He laughed and didn’t look suspicious or upset by Suji’s words. Little by little, she was getting what he liked or what amused him.

Once they began eating, silence ruled in the kitchen, only interrupted by his slurping. It gave Suji the time to think about what to ask, talk and say. This was a great opportunity. Do Kyung Soo just invited her to dinner. In a way.

Maybe a light conversation could be good as an icebreaker. But weather conversations were for idiots. And after that cuddling situation, they were way past something like that. Maybe a random question about the house could lead to something. Or to nothing.

Suji had a third option. The risky one, but at the same time, the one that gave her a better hunch “Mister Do, are you feeling better?”

“Better?”

“Yeah, the other day, you know… when you found me in your room” He didn’t answer immediately,  taking his time to chew and swallow his food. Suji waited without looking at him, giving him some time. 

“I am better, thanks for asking”

“What happened?”

“Just work stuff, I was stressed”

“And snuggling half-naked takes the stress away?” Suji couldn’t interpret Kyung Soo’s stare. His eyes were dark, a bit mad maybe, but his mouth didn’t agree with them and refused to stop grinning. 

“It does. You know that cuddling has the same effect as painkillers?”

“No, I didn’t know”

“And the warmth of a woman’s skin takes away every single worry…now let me ask you something, what were you doing in my room?”

“I think you can put two and two together, sir” Kyung Soo stayed in silence again. He didn’t touch his chopstick and didn’t look at her either. Instead, he got up from his seat, thanked for the food and left.

Suji cursed herself and kept eating the rest of her hamburger with rage. The questions behind Do’s behavior started to shape in her head. Scared? Offended? Was he angry by her words? Was this a step back or a step forward in her mission?

Whatever the answer was, the only one who knew it was him.

The lava cake had to wait for tomorrow. Suji had lost her appetite.

She was washing the few pieces of tableware they used when she heard footsteps approaching. She ignored them, already knowing who it was. She decided to wait for his next move. But he remained still at the door, she could see his reflection in the kitchen window. And also could feel his stare on her back. 

“You need something, sir?” Fuck it. She couldn’t wait.  It made her somehow anxious, and nervous. She hated it. 

“No” Was his only answer.

Bastard. That answer said nothing. Not even his tone. 

“I was just thinking” Suji froze. Kyung Soo began moving from the door, approaching her, and then stopped again. 

“Since you came here, I have been wondering, to the point of loosening some sleep, what is under those long skirts you wear all the time” 

Bingo. 

There it was. But this time, she did stay in silence. Only turned around, facing him, faking an expression of doubt and nervousness. He walked the last four steps that kept him away from her and stood there, his body an inch away from hers.

He bent down, dropping a gentle kiss on her lips. Sadly, the soft sight that left her mouth was real.

She waited for another kiss, and this time she will have her reactions under control. But it didn’t come. They stared at each other for a couple of seconds, she could imagine how her face looked, clueless and maybe a bit pale. He didn’t move, he didn’t kiss her again.

He was waiting.

He was waiting for her to make the next move.

She didn’t know how. This wasn’t the plan. The plan was that he was going to force himself into her. And she would let it happen. But that clearly wasn’t his plan.

She didn’t know how to make her next move. How to kiss him back. As soft as he did it? Or rougher? How long the kiss should be? This was her 15 years old self all over again. 

“Maybe I should...” Kyung Soo took a step back, retracting like a wounded animal, but she stopped him. She wasn’t going to let this opportunity go just because she forgot how to kiss someone. She grabbed him by his waist pulling him against her. He was shocked at first, but a faltering smile appeared on his face. 

“I thought you were rejecting me” She shook her head and leaned closer, kissing him, a little less soft than he did. She hugged him by the waist tighter, pressing her chest against him, and sucking on his lower lip. Kyung Soo groaned in pleasure and grabbed her face. His hands were strong although they always looked so soft and small to her. He answered the kiss, his mouth hot and responsive to hers. Suji made the decision to kiss him, but she didn’t have time or mind to plan what to do next. Her brain, instead of processing the kiss, was playing different scenarios, trying to come up with the best and most useful way to continue that night. But Kyung Soo was faster than her. His mind worked better than hers.

He let go of her face and moved away from the kiss. He didn’t say anything, he didn’t even look at her to try to convey something. Instead, he dropped to his knees and sank his hands under Suji’s skirt, grabbing her ankles. He kept his stare fixated on hers, with dark seductive eyes. He kept caressing her ankles and up to her knee. If he kept moving up, he would find the big scar on her left thigh. Suji didn’t know how to act now. Normally, when it came to these kinds of situations, men were always rough. She would be tossed in a bed and then the only thing left was waiting for the pain. But Kyung Soo was doing the opposite. “Suji, I’m going to…”

“I know, go ahead” Suji was wrong. She thought he was talking about sex. But no. She could never imagine what he would do next. He grabbed the hem of her black skirt and passed it above his head, sinking under it. The first thing she felt was his lips against her thighs. Her hands kept still, grabbing the closest solid surface. And her skirt kept moving, with Kyung Soo’s head shifting, alternating between her left and right thigh.

She was already getting into the zone. Her happy place. That imaginary place she visited each time the mission demanded it. In that way, it was easier to get over it in the future.

Meanwhile, Kyung Soo played with the elastic of her underwear, she started to bite her lip, it was easier to concentrate in that way.

Her natural instinct to show some resistance started to dissipate when Kyung Soo pulled her underwear down her legs slowly, kissing her knees tenderly. She could barely register it. Suji looked down at her skirt and whatever was happening down there. Why was this guy being so thorough with his touch? This wasn’t normal. Not a common thing. The bad guy, the one she had to fight, was always some pig that broke every single moral he could find. And the top one was always abuse. Human abuse. Female abuse. She had gone through it, and she was ready to go through it again. She knew how.  

But this. Do Kyung Soo, South Korea’s most wanted, the guy that runs the most secretive drug cartel in the country, was now giving her oral. And the worst, he was good at it. He was so good at it. 

Maybe she didn’t need her happy place. 

Still with his head under her skirt, Kyung Soo was having no trouble finding the right spots. And the feelings of kicking his head away or grab him by the nape so he could keep working were fighting inside her head.

He kept kissing in between her legs. And it kept getting better. Inevitably her breathing lost its rhythm. Her knees were lacking some strength too. Her mind was lacking clarity, and the desire to grab him by the nape and sink his tongue deeper was getting stronger.

Slowly, he detached his lips from her, kissing down her legs and getting out from under Suji’s skirt. His hair was messy, his cheeks a bit flushed and his lips glowing. He licked them in a way that caught Suji’s interest way too much. 

“Suji, I’m at my limit” From the back pocket of his pajama pants, Kyung Soo took off a metallic square. 

‘Remember you are supposedly interested in this guy’ 

Her mind reminded her. So she grabbed the metallic square from his hand.

“I see” She said with a quiet voice, not meeting his eyes, looking at her right hand that was pulling down his pants. 

“I can do it” He tried to stop her. 

“You have done a lot” Answered Suji with a flirty tone, getting a shy laugh from him. Still, he helped her pull down his pants and waited patiently until she finished putting the condom on. She gave him a couple of strokes, just testing, and looked straight into his eyes, waiting for his next move. He decisively grabbed her by the waist and sat her on top of the kitchen counter to later grab the hem of her skirt and pull it up, uncovering her naked legs. 

“Bite here” He said, twining half of the skirt and posing it against her lips. Suji opened her mouth and grabbed the piece of clothing between her teeth, allowing him to have a clear view of her lower half.

Her breath got stuck in her throat the moment Kyung Soo pushed in. She was waiting for some flashbacks, the psychiatrist had told her that in the future, especially during intercourse, her mind could bring back images. But his solid hold had her strongly close to reality, to what was happening right now. She was also expecting pain, but to her surprise, she was wet enough so Kyung Soo slid inside her easily. His movements were slow, his stare serious. She only stared at him, trying to read or understand any expression that could cross his face. But she only found concentration, that and arousal. Kyung Soo stopped his movements for a moment, rearranging his position and finally looking at her. A thin smile appeared, apparently, he liked what he saw “Open your legs a bit wider for me please” He said with a velvety tone that made every single hair on Suji’s nape stand. She did as told, and he didn’t think twice before slamming back into her. A strangled hiss left her mouth, and her hands involuntarily traveled to his shoulders pulling him closer. Involuntarily.

He rested his head on her shoulder, with his lips stuck to her neck, nibbling at her skin, eliciting soft moans from Suji. She did her best, her biggest effort to keep her mind clear, to stay in control of her actions. But he was so damn talented, and she was still a woman who knew how to enjoy a good fuck. And the guy was making her feel very good, despite the fact that she was still fully clothed, or sort of. His hips changed their rhythm and... 

“FUCK THAT’S IT!” She let go of her skirt as the words left her mouth before she could even form them inside her mind.

Kyung Soo, after some minutes, had found that place inside her that made her see white and moan like in a cheap porn movie. It took her years of self-loving to find it, and now this damn drug dealer had found it in no time. She could feel his smile against her neck, and it angered her. But he kept thrusting, and the anger quickly dissipated. He withdrew and pushed in hard, again and again. He quickened his pace, and she raised her hips, wanting him deeper inside. He pumped harder and deeper in and she gasped at the strength of each thrust. Just a few more and she will be done. 

His breath matched Suji’s. He groaned as he burst inside the condom. She covered her mouth, not giving him the pleasure of hearing the long moan that accompanied her ecstasy.  He withdrew from her and took off his condom, tossing it into the trash can. Suji was still panting, resting her back against the cold surface of the window behind her, still not sure if she could stand firmly. He lifted his head, looking at Suji from above. He dried the sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand and pulled up his pants. 

“Somehow…I feel like apologizing”

“For what?” She asked, pulling down her skirt. 

“Jump on you?” Suji shrugged it off and grabbed his hands when he offered help. 

“It wasn’t against my will, although, If they find out about this in the agency, I’ll get fired so…”

“I will take responsibility if that happens, I doubt it though…we have to…”

“A secret, I know, I like this job, I don’t want to lose it”

“Then it’s alright” He said as he took her face in his hand and pulled her again into a kiss. He gave her a wide smile and grabbed her by the hips when her legs wobbled. Suji thanked him and tried to walk by herself, picking up her underwear, not bothering with put it back on. 

“I think I’ll go to bed right now”

“Sure me too, I will see you tomorrow”

“Sleep well sir” Suji saw him disappear through the door and dashed to her room. She took off her computer from under the bed and turned on the microphone’s software. She didn’t press record, she only wanted to see if Kyung Soo had something to say, out of curiosity. She could hear him walk around the room to finally get inside the bed. 

“Damn…that was good” Was the only thing she heard him say. Suji laughed, not sure if it was from happiness or triumph.

TBC

[jazmin61315]

BIRD CONTROL – BEST WAYS FOR BIRD REMOVAL

Why you should Bird Removal Costs 

Pigeons can be amusing to see, but their droppings can trigger damage to structures and spread illness to individuals and other animals. You can prevent this from taking place, particularly through deterrents and humane population control. Prior to you take any procedures, examine your nationwide and local laws worrying their defense status and which manage methods you might utilize.

Why you should Get Rid Of Pigeons

Disclosure: This post may include affiliate links. This implies that at no cost to you, we may earn a small commission for certifying purchases. Couple of things are more bothersome than walking down the street just for a pigeon to poop on you from overhead. Even worse, that poop can cover your automobile or property in a nasty, slimy goo.

But worry not, we’re here to inform you how to get rid of pigeons and keep these critters far from your home. from top insect control business in your area – how to get rid of pigeons on your roof. While they’ve constantly had something of a bad credibility, pigeons have a more honorable place in our history than you might anticipate.

THE BEST WAYS TO PREVENT BIRDS

Pigeons consist of the 310-species Columbidae family. These birds are technically doves, with the rock dove and turtledove being the two most noteworthy species. Just what separates a pigeon from a dove is nearly entirely aesthetic, with researchers normally going by size (doves being smaller), while nonreligious and spiritual circles consider any dove that’s not completely white to be a pigeon.

They’re also easy to domesticate, having been the first recognized bird to be made into animals. City-based pigeons have actually ended up being scavengers, quiting their typical diet plan for any scraps they can discover, however usually choose fruit and seeds. Many types have actually adapted to eat worms and bugs, with a minimum of one species choosing them.

Nevertheless, one thing they all have in typical is a habit of building rather flimsy nests out of branches in which they’ll lay one to two eggs at a time. These nests are normally kept in the very same location the species prefers to roam, with types such as the rock dove selecting high ledges and rooftops when in a city setting due to the shortage of trees.

Steps to Commercial Pigeon Control with a trusted company

The best ways to Netting For Pigeon Control

Some species tend to be confined to small locations, while others have actually spread out along with people. The single most prevalent species is the rock dove, which can be discovered throughout the world in big numbers. Pigeons are incredibly resourceful and surprisingly intelligent. As a result, they have actually discovered to handle human expansion and adjust to city settings easily.

Healthy pigeon poop has no smell, however city pigeons are scavengers and frequently victim to disease and abnormality. Their poop can get extremely runny and contain high acidity, wreaking havok on your tidy car, windows, walls, and pathways. The level of acidity can even break down stone, concrete, and other materials with time.

They’ll congregate anywhere food is available, making it more tough to bring in songbirds. They can be noisy, unpleasant, and go after that pie you just sat out to cool. Simply put, pigeons, like loved ones, are often best enjoyed at a distance. Getting rid of pigeons is a lot easier than it may first appear, although it can take a little bit of time to eliminate bigger invasions.

Professional that Bird Removal Costs

A pigeon trap works the same method as other humane critter traps. Merely set it up, include some appealing food (fruits, vegetables, and cracked corn are some yummy alternatives) for bait, and after that wait. A lot of these traps, such as the Tomahawk Pigeon Trap, have entryways on opposite sides, enabling you to catch a pigeon per door prior to having to clear the trap.

Another popular trap is a trigger type trap which captures them in an internet. It’s a little more difficult to set up but you can get the exact same outcomes at a fraction of the cost. from top bug control companies in your location. You can utilize a slinky or insulation wire on the railing to assist keep pigeons from perching there.

You can then use duct tape to connect it to the railing at 2/3 inch periods. While a simple method, pigeons discover it quite uncomfortable to land on. Guarantee there’s no attractive food source present, and you’ll easily have the ability to keep pigeons off the veranda. It’s in fact not difficult to keep a pigeon from roosting on your roof.

EXPERTS THAT

BIRD REMOVAL

COSTS

These spikes aren’t sharp, however they make it hard for the pigeon to land. You may hear individuals recommending simple methods to kill pigeons, however these approaches are not just terrible in intent, they can often impact other types you might not wish to eliminate. Here are 3 of the most popular tips for eliminating pigeons and why you should not utilize them: In spite of their old motto, Alka Seltzer will not save you from pigeons.

In reality, nevertheless, they can simply spit up the foamy mess utilizing the same methods they use for feeding their young. Poison is a huge no-no. Even if you’re trying to feed the target pigeon by hand, it’s a simple matter for a sparrow or other bird to swoop in and snatch the poisoned food.

This is a really popular old wives’ tale. Rice will not eliminate a bird and is actually part of numerous species’ diets. In spite of what popular takes claim, raw rice takes a long time to soak up liquids. By the time it could potentially become a danger to the bird, they’ll have either absorbed or passed the grains.

EXPERTS THAT REMOVE A BIRDS NEST

Merely getting rid of pigeons isn’t enough, as they have a routine of returning no matter the number of times you kick them out. Using visual deterrents and chemical or herbal repellents will help keep these pesky critters from turning your house into an event area. It can likewise help to make your property as uninviting as possible by removing those things which can bring in pigeons in the very first place.

Try placing a ceramic owl or fake snake in places they’re prone to gather together. Just like other bugs, it’s a great idea to shift these decoys around periodically so the birds do not suspect they’re simply design. A kite with a hawk shape can also be utilized to terrify pigeons away, as they look like a predator in flight. Ask Total Bird Control for more details.

More alternatives can also work versus other critters, such as setting up a motion-sensitive water sprinkler. These are terrific since it suggests it waters your lawn or garden at the exact same time it frightens away bugs. Sonic deterrents do a fantastic task, but can aggravate any four-legged family members, so they’re not for everybody.

SAFE AND EFFECTIVE CONTRACTORS THAT BIRD NEST REMOVAL

These items are either focused urine or chemical replications of urine. Pigeons and other bugs will get a whiff and believe a hunter is on the loose. However, these products do not always work and can rinse when it rains. A with an excellent track record can be quite simple to make and works well versus a variety of other bugs.

Shake well and place in direct sunlight to ferment for five days. Finally, add 1/4 cup of vinegar to the mix and shake again, then spray your plants or surface areas with it (pigeon removal). The capsicum will irritate a pigeon’s (or other animal’s) feet and prevent them from going back to that spot.

TOTAL BIRD CONTROL BIRMINGHAM

TBC Nationwide Office, Highfield Farm, Middle Ln, King’s Norton, Birmingham B38 0DX +441216959076

[cherrycoveredpythia]

Extended thoughts on Brave the Tempest

2017’s Ride the Storm closed out the four-book arc that also included Hunt the Moon, Tempt the Stars, and Reap the Wind.  In these books, Cassie battled Ares and his minions while drawing closer to Pritkin and eventually hunting him through time and space. She learns more about her abilities while trying to save his life, and also becomes a reluctant power player in supernatural (and inter-dimensional) politics. Without her faithful companion by her side, she becomes more confident in her own powers and resourcefulness. Of course, she’s still Cassie, so all her discoveries and victories are slapdash and hard-won. But they are still victories. She’s a daughter of Chaos, give her a break.

Brave the Tempest focuses on Cassie’s political duties and her complicated feelings about being a leader and a “hero”. She’s now slain two gods (with help), but that doesn’t result in easy respect from the witches or the vampires. The witches see her as a tool of the Silver Circle, while the vampires see her as an extension of Mircea. They are all so wrong.

Cassie has to demonstrate her full strength to convince these factions to cooperate with her. It works, but nothing is ever simple. In the long run, who will love her and who will fear her? 

She’s becoming more like her mother every day.

Overall feelings

There are some amazing, joyful moments here. Please understand that I adore these books and characters, so I say this with love…

… but the book felt disjointed to me. We buzz back and forth from the witches to the vampires to the demons, and then go to Faerie and Victorian England. We get emotional scenes with Mircea, Pritkin, Marco, Rhea, and Rico. Augustine brings home a kidnapped fae. Tami needs to hire some staff but no one will take the job. Fred is a spy. Cassie is exhausted. I felt kind of exhausted too.

Important plotlines: Cassie’s growing pains with her powers, the political trouble with the witches and vampires, and the imminent invasion of Faerie. And then there was the timeline rupture. The rupture was terrifying and the fight with Jo in Victorian London was a full-on horror show. Cassie learned more about Pythian spells and then linked up her powers with Pritkin through the Lover’s Knot spell.  She’ll probably need these tools for the coming showdown. She and Pritkin are even more powerful together than they are apart. And they are both forces for good. But will everyone see them that way?

I think Karen is just laying out all the pieces for the next arc. It’s a little messy right now, but it will all fit together soon. I’m glad that Shatter the Earth is coming in December. If I had to wait another two years for the next book, I would be upset.

Favorite moments

Pritkin flirting and Cassie retaliating during S’mores night. Especially the marshmallow at the end. Goddamn.

The Dickening.

Everything related to Saffy and Vi, and seeing Saffy and Rhea becoming friends. I think she is a great influence on Rhea.

Pritkin and Cassie’s meeting with Adra. I high-key love Adra. He’s a really interesting foil for Caedmon, who leads their alliance with the “heavenly” planes. Caedmon is manic and charming, while Adra is pleasant and even-keeled. Except when he forgets to animate his glamourie. I reallllllly want to know what Adra looks like under there, but I figure he’s a Lovecraftian monster that would drive us insane.  

Adra shading Pritkin for never attending demon council meetings like other “heirs apparent.” 

Cassie nonchalantly offering to bring Adra to the vampire council.

Gertie nonchalantly easing Pritkin out of the room and shifting him to the depot.

Cassie borrowing Pritkin’s powers to suck the energy out of Jo.

Big events and revelations

Pritkin is not shy and neither is Cassie. I thought we would get some pussy-footing about their relationship, but we DID NOT. Pritkin came on strong and Cassie reciprocated. I wish I had a chance to read Siren’s Song first. They had some time to let the tension build and I *do* love a slow burn… torture me, baby!

Ancient Horrors! Children of Tiamat/Tethys! Pritkin is 1/16th divine! Kind of a watered-down Ancient Horror, if you will. Minus the tentacles.

Lover’s Knot

Fucking Jonathan

Invasion of Faerie needs to happen ASAP

Jo is more dangerous as a ghost because ghosts can absorb infinite power. (Can we turn Billy Joe into a super soldier???)

MIRCEA THE BOLD!

Cassie agreed to go find Elena because she’s afraid that Mircea will do it himself. And she doesn’t want to kill him.

Fred is a spy working for MARLOWE! And I guess his master power is camouflaging his aura.

Rico is from Napoli (this explains a lot, because I was confused when he said putanas instead of putane. Dialect!)

NEW PYTHIAN SPELLS: Shards and Chimera!

Young Agnes is a real bitch.  

The pros

I said this in a separate post, but I’ll say it here too. Cassie and Pritkin are back together and their relationship is so healthy and mutually supportive that it makes my heart ache. This is real #relationshipgoals. They are confidants and protectors and cheerleaders for each other. They don’t keep secrets or manipulate or gaslight. We need more of this sci-fi/fantasy and romance. There are too many dark, brooding male love interests who are borderline abusive. (Ahem, Mircea.)

MORE LGBT REPRESENTATION! 

The emergence of Mircea the Bold. I like Mircea as a character, but not as a love interest for Cassie. I’m happy to see him going through this transformation. He’s becoming more open and genuine. He’s not going to win Cassie’s affections, but I do think that he’s going to redeem himself in Dory’s eyes.

GERTIE IS BACK! And *not* as a roadblock. She’s a powerful woman who helps other women, and I am all. about. that. mood.

The cons

 TOO. MUCH. RECAP. Especially recap that broke up highly emotional moments. I don’t care if you are trying to explain things for new readers. Fuck ‘em. Anyone who buys a book, discovers it is part 1000 of an ongoing series, and tries to read it anyways… is a psychopath.

Too many plot-lines

 I miss Rosier.

We all knew that something was up with Fred, but I don’t think that his revelation as a spy got as much weight and screen-time as it deserved.

 I feel like the “wrap-up” with Jonathan felt rushed. He’s supposed to be terrifying but I’m like “meh, whatever, Jonathan, small fry compared to Apollo and Ares.” But I think she’ll get back to it in greater depth in the next book, so I can deal.

Can we PLEASE have some consistency about Agnes’s age? We see her as a teenager in late 19th-century London, for god’s sake. She must have been *at least* 130 years old when she died, and that’s being charitable. Previously, Cassie has said that Agnes was about 80. Lies. 

The questions

1.       My BIGGEST question. Cassie is changing. Not just maturing, but changing on a metaphysical level. The coldness, the hunger… I’m frightened for her. It’s not withdrawal from the Tears of Apollo and it’s not normal exhaustion. I have some theories.  

 Her divine side is becoming stronger and she’s beginning to require life energy in the same way that her human side needs food, water, and sleep. Why is this happening now? Maybe the Tears of Apollo are part of the equation, albeit indirectly. She’s been using more and more Pythian power thanks to the potion, and perhaps that has awakened her divine side more strongly. This is a little worrisome because she may have to feed on a regular basis to stay functional. Can she get all the energy she needs from incubus sex or from the Lover’s Knot? What are the moral considerations here? 

Less likely, but she might really be pregnant. I’m not a huge fan of this idea, but Rosier does mention in Reap the Wind or Ride the Storm that the incubus-child feeds on the life energy of the mother as it grows. That’s why his attempts at procreation failed until he impregnated Morgaine, who was part royal fae and part divine. If this is the case, Cassie might be having life-energy cravings instead of food cravings. Or maybe this is the divine/demon/fey version of morning sickness? Pritkin, please start using birth control.

2. What happened with Pritkin in Siren’s Song? Does Jonas know his true identity now?

3. So who is Pritkin’s divine great-great grandmother? Any speculation?

4. Cassie begins to wonder if any of the gods might be open to diplomacy. This must go somewhere. And it’s true, there are a number of gods in the pantheon who are traditionally friendlier towards humans than others. Athena is the first that comes to mind. There’s also the mythic trope of the Trickster/Fire-Bringer who helps humanity: Prometheus, Anansi, etc.  And there’s Loki, who doesn’t so much love humans as he loves to trouble the other gods.

MVPs

Ok, Cassie is the real MVP, as always. But barring her, I’m awarding this prize to the no-nonsense, sisterly duo of our hearts: Gertie and Hilde. They are officious and annoying, but that’s because they tell you what you don’t want to hear, and they are RIGHT. They are so right.

[axel-fics]

What about Axel bringing his s/o to see the festival and floating lanterns in Corona?

I’m literally gasping because THIS IS SO CUTE WHY DIDN’T I THINK OF THIS SOONER!? Here you go anon :D hope you like it!

Axel’s Day Off 

“Okay, that’s quite enough training for today.” Merlin closed his large book of spells with a loud thump. “You two are making excellent progress! I think the you both deserve the day off tomorrow to rest. I will update Master Yensid over tea this evening on your progress. Enjoy your time off!” 

Kairi looked up at Axel and smiled. “A whole day off! Any ideas on what you wanna do?”

Axel was lost in his thoughts and didn’t hear Kairi’s question. All he could think about was spending time with you. It’s been weeks since he’s seen you; before he left with Kairi for training, the last time you were both in the same room was at Master Yensid’s tower after Sora and Riku’s Mark of Mastery exam. Although you weren’t officially together (yet), there was definitely something unspoken between the two of you. Catching one staring at the other here and there, light touches in passing, always making each other shy away and blush. He felt something deep for you, and decided now was the time to finally show it. 

“Axel? Are you listening to me?” Kairi asked. 

“Huh? Oh, sorry. What were you saying?”

“I asked how you plan on spending your day off tomorrow, silly. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. I just…. I think I wanna spend it with [Y/N]. Get to know her some more, ya know?”

“Aww, Axel! I’m sure she’d love to spend some time with you, too!” Kairi squealed.

And that’s when he realized the problem: how was he going to find you?? You were off venturing with Sora, no doubt, and he had no clue where you were. His shoulders dropped in defeat. “Yeah, but how am I going to find her? Who know’s where she is, especially with Sora leading the way…”

Kairi rolled her eyes and pulled her phone out of her pockets. She smiled as she dialed Sora’s number while Axel looked over her shoulders. 

“Where did you get that??” 

“Chip and Dale made them for all of us! It came with my new outfit. You’d have yours too if you opened your suitcase from Master Yensid,” she smirked. 

Axel scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Wise-ass,” he muttered. 

“I heard that. I’m trying to help you out, you know,” Kairi stuck her tongue out. Her phone stopped ringing and a live video of Sora displayed on the screen. “Hey, Sora! How’s it going??”

“Kairi! I’m so happy to see you! You’ll never guess what happened! We just came back from a world where we were turned into toys! We were all shrunk down really small, and even got to explore around a huge toy store! It was so cool!” Sora was practically yelling into the phone because he was so excited. Kairi shook her head and smiled, letting him ramble on about other worlds that he’s visited since they last saw each other. 

“Sora, that all sounds great! But Axel here actually needs to talk to you. It’s very important,” she waved at Axel and shoved the phone in his face. “Talk!”

Axel stared at the phone and noticed you in the background, sitting with a girl with long blonde hair near a lake. He heard you laugh, and it made his heart skip a beat, something he thought he’d never feel again once he became a Nobody. Snapping out of his thoughts, he took the phone from Kairi and focused back on Sora. 

“So uh… where exactly are you guys now?”

“The Kingdom of Corona! We landed a little while ago, probably’ll set up camp for the night before we continue in the morning. Our friend Rapunzel needs to get to the Kingdom by tomorrow night to see the lantern festival. Why, what’s up?”

A lightbulb went off in Axel’s mind. “Lantern festival, huh? What’s that all about?”

“Apparently they do it every year in hopes that the Kingdom’s lost Princess makes her way home. Rapunzel says thousands of them are released into the night sky and you can see them from miles away! But it’s also Rapunzel’s birthday tomorrow, and she wants to see them up close. We’re helping her get there safely.” 

“Hey, you guys think you can stick around the campsite a little late tomorrow morning? I’m thinking about coming out to you guys…” Axel trailed off as he looked passed Sora to look at you again. 

“Oh, really? Uh, sure! We can hang out until you guys come. Wait, Kairi’s coming too, right?” Sora brought the phone closer to his face, cutting off Axel’s view of you. 

“Of course I’m coming, Sora! I’m not going to let Axel have all the fun on our day off,” Kairi poked her head back into the camera’s view. 

“Awesome, we’ll see you guys tomorrow!” Sora smiled widely and hung up before Axel could even ask where their campsite was. 

“Guess we’ll have an early start tomorrow…” he sighed. 

~*~

Thanks to Merlin’s magic, Axel and Kairi were transported to the Kingdom of Corona early that next morning. They arrived in a secluded area with a tall, narrow tower next to a stream. Once they located a hidden cave that led to the main part of the forest, the two of them began on their journey to locate you and Sora. It was a beautiful summer morning: the sun already beaming down strong, the soft grass warm to the touch, a slight cool breeze picking up dandelions. This world was simply beautiful. 

“This place is amazing,” Kairi gasped.

Axel hummed in agreement. “We should still be on our guard. There could be Heartless around here.”

“Right,” Kairi nodded. The two of them continued to walk for bit longer until they reached a clearing. As if on cue, a few Heartless formed and the two wielders-in-training summoned their Keyblades. Standing back to back, Axel and Kairi readied themselves and launched their attacks, keeping in mind everything they’ve learned so far from Merlin. After a few combo attacks, the Heartless were cleared out. For now. 

“Hey, look up ahead!” Kairi pointed to a grassy area next to a few hills with some logs and a small fire pit in the center. Axel could see a few forms laying on the ground, immediately recognizing you amongst them. Figures, Heartless are roaming around and you and Sora would be sound asleep. Kairi ran up ahead stood over Sora with her arms on her hips. “Sora! Always such a lazy bum, wake up!” Sora didn’t budge one bit, letting out a rather loud snore. Axel rolled his eyes and walked over to where you were sleeping. Kneeling down beside you, he pushed a strand of your [h/c] hair away from your face and smiled. You looked so peaceful; he wished he could curl up and lay next to you, but for once he didn’t want to waste his one day off taking naps. 

“[Y/N]? Hey, wake up,” he whispered. You shifted slightly and grumbled before slowly opening an eye. You thought you were seeing an illusion, or even possibly still dreaming. Axel looked down at you with a soft smile. The sun made his red hair appear more fiery than ever, and he placed a hand on your shoulder. Nope, definitely not dreaming. 

“Axel?? How?? What are you doing here?”

“Morning, sleepy head. I guess Sora didn’t mention that Kairi and I were coming to visit you guys?”

“No! Ugh, Sora, we gotta do something about that memory of yours!” You threw a nearby mushroom at Sora’s head. He jolted up from his deep slumber, almost bumping heads with Kairi. 

“What the — Kairi! You’re here!” He practically attacked Kairi with a gigantic bear hug that nearly knocked the two of them over. 

“Hey, in case you guys were wondering, there are others here who would like to wake up at a normal time of the morning,” a voice groaned. You all looked towards the rest of the group as they slowly started to wake up. Donald didn’t look too thrilled, per usual, and Goofy just let out a big yawn and waved at Axel and Kairi. 

“Sorry, Flynn! Oh, you guys! This is Flynn Rider and Rapunzel. [Y/n], Donald, Goofy and I are helping them get to the Kingdom for the Lantern festival today.”

Rapunzel hesitantly waived at the new guests, while Flynn shot a thumbs up in the air before flopping back down to catch a few more snoozes. You and Axel turned at the same time to look at each other, immediately shying away when your eyes connected. A blush crept up on your face and you did your best to hide it behind your hair, but Axel gently pushed the same strand out of the way and behind your ear. 

“Well, let’s get going then! I want to make sure we get there for the start of the festival,” Rapunzel jumped up from her spot and started running away from the campsite, too excited to start the day. “Flynn, hurry up!”

“Is it too much to ask to sleep a little longer…?”

~*~

Several hours later after a number of Heartless and Nobodies vanquished, you finally arrived at the Kingdom’s main village. The entire place was streamed with purple flags with golden suns painted on them, villagers lined the market place to sell their best food and souvenirs for the festival. Excited chatter was amongst all of them, hoping that this year would finally be the year the lost Princess would return home after being missing for almost two decades.

“Wow, look at this place!” Kairi exclaimed. She grabbed Sora’s hand and dragged him to the center of the town circle where people started to gather with flowers. 

“Ready?” You looked up at Axel and smiled, holding your hand out. He stared longer than he probably should have, which made you grow more nervous, but he finally smiled back and took your hand. You led the way to the town circle where music began playing loudly and made your way through the crowd. Rapunzel was already dancing in circles and grabbed Sora and Kairi’s hands to join her. Flynn stood next to the two of you, crossing his arms and admiring Rapunzel, until she dragged him into the dancing crowd as well. Donald and Goofy jumped in, accidentally tripping up a few people along the way, leaving just you and Axel along the sidelines. 

Kairi ran over to you and Axel, pulling you towards the crowd. “C’mon you guys!” She pulled your arm so hard you thought it popped out of its socket for a second! You looked back at Axel and smiled, holding out your other hand for him to join, but you were interrupted by a villager who started to twirl you around. 

Axel shook his head and laughed. “I’m enjoying the show! Have fun!” He winked as your eyes widened, as if saying “Are you kidding, help me!” Axel’s attention turned to a man selling lanterns from across the circle. Making his way over, he purchased two lanterns and stuffed them in his pocket before returning to his spot in the crowd. Moments later, someone in the crowd shouted that it was time to go to the boats. 

Out of breath from dancing, you walked back to where Axel was standing. The sun was starting to set and a light breeze swept through the evening air as people started to make their way down to the shores. The group briefly rejoined at the center of the dancing circle before Rapunzel and Flynn took off on their own, followed by Kairi and Sora. Axel looked down at you and placed his hand on your shoulder. “Come with me this way.”

You nodded and took Axel’s hand, this time him leading you, to one of the long wooden piers by the water. It was just the two of you walking slowly down the wooden planks until you reached the far end and sat down at the edge, letting your legs dangle off the sides of the pier. A few moments of silence ticked by, and then finally a single lantern started floating above the castle in the distance. Dozens slowly followed its path, and before you knew it, the entire sky was full of lanterns! You gazed up in awe at how beautiful it was, not noticing that Axel had taken out two lanterns of your own.

Clearing his throat, Axel held up a lantern in each hand and passed one to you. Your eyes beamed at him as you took yours. “Axel, thank you!” A small flame illuminated from Axel’s fingertip, carefully lighting the bottom of each lantern. The two of you raised them up above your heads before releasing them into the night sky to join the rest of the other lanterns floating above you.

Axel couldn’t help but stare at you again; the way the wind gently blew your hair around, how your eyes sparkled while looking up at the lanterns, your face glowing from the golden lights surrounding the both of you. You were the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen, and tonight he was determined to show it to you. He lightly tucked the same stubborn strand of hair that kept falling in front of your face behind your ear before tilting your chin towards him. 

“[Y/N], I just can’t keep quiet about this anymore. I like you… I like you a lot. I know we’ve had our differences in the past. Hell, we’ve even fought each other more times than I’d like to remember. But things are different now, and if you’d give me the chance, I’d really like to show you.” Axel stumbled on his words a few times; you could tell he was pretty nervous, and you decided that a flustered Axel is a very cute Axel. 

You giggled and cupped his cheek with your palm, smiling back at him. “Axel, I really like you too. I have for a while. Honestly, what happened in the past doesn’t matter to me anymore. I just want to get to know the real you.” 

Axel leaned into your hand, placing his own on top and looked into your bright [e/c] eyes. He started to bring his face closer to yours until your lips were just barely touching, and closed the distance between you. It was a soft kiss at first, slowly evolving into a deeper one as he ran his fingers through your hair and lightly grabbed on. For the first time in what seemed like a century, Axel remembered what love felt like. And he’d be damned if he were to ever let that, or you, slip away again. 

[eclecticminded]

Forgotten

anonymous asked: Read your most recent fic and I loved it! Could we get a prequel where Nevada forgot their anniversary ?

anonymous asked: Prompt - Nevada forgets his and the reader’s anniversary

Let’s get some minor angst and fluff up in here!! Hope y’all like this!

Nevada forgets your first anniversary.

Words:1162

Warnings Food and alcohol mention. Cursing.

Tags: @southsiderepresent @glimmerglittergirl @madpanda75  @southern-magnolia @katmstanton @esparza-army @sweetsummertime99  @obfuscateyummy @lifeisbetterwithbarba  @lyssa1385  @hux-me-up   @bowieisawizard @sleepylunarwolf @mrsrafaelbarba anyone else ask!

Also I have a Kofi (link in blog description) if anyone wants to donate!

It wasn’t unusual for Nevada to forget things like dates every now and again. But he usually remembered the important things. That’s why when he made no mention of your anniversary the week leading up to it, you figured he was just planning a surprise. The morning of he kissed you goodbye and rushed out. Surely there would be flowers sent to work? Or a surprise lunch?

 When you got home sans no contact other than the standard conversation, you decided to take matters into your own hands. His favorite dinner was made and prepared while you waited and waited. At nine he finally responded to your myriad of texts saying he’d be late because he was out with friends. You appetite was suddenly lost as the candles burned out. It was like they were taunting you.

 Angrily you scrawled a message on the notepad from the fridge and tossed it on the table. You did the dishes, banging them harder than necessary, and went to bed. Fuck Nevada. It was your first anniversary and he forgot. Who does that? You cried yourself to sleep.

 Nevada came stumbling in after midnight a little drunk. He was frustrated you hadn’t responded to his messages or answered his calls; you’d turn your phone off after the third one. He called for you and you didn’t answer, that was his first clue something was wrong. The second was staring him in the face when he flipped the light on. On the kitchen table sat two plates of his favorite foods, including dessert; both untouched. There were candles burned out and wax pooled on the table. A wrapped box sat next to a note.

Thanks for forgetting our anniversary. Nice to know where I stand, going out with your friends instead.  Sleep on the fucking sofa.

 “Shit,” Nevada swore under his breath. He knew your anniversary was soon, but he didn’t realize it was today. He opened the box to find a framed picture from your first date, him glowering while you licked ice cream off his cheek mid-laugh. A small card said it was for his desk, to remember you by.  He’d really fucked up this time. He tried the bedroom door and wasn’t surprised to find it locked. He hung his head and plopped down on the sofa.

 The next morning you snuck out for work, careful not to wake Nevada. The day was dragging on, and after the afternoon meeting you were suddenly pulled into a hallway as you passed. At first you fought back, but saw it was Nevada and just glared.

 “What the fuck are you doing here,” you spat at him and he shrunk like a kicked puppy.

 “I’m sorry I forgot,” he pleaded and dropped his outstretched hands when you stepped away from him.

 “I think you’re just sorry I’m mad,” you lowered your eyes and started to storm away but he pulled you back.

 “Loca, y/n, please,” he seemed truly remorseful but you were still furious.

 “Let go of me! If it was important to you, you would have remembered,” your crossed arms let him know he was losing what little ground he had.

 “It is important! I thought it was next month! That’s when I took you to the fancy restaurant!”

 “It was yesterday, when we went for ice cream and you asked me to be yours after months of just being fuck buddies,” you lip quivered.

 “Oh,” his face fell.

 “Oh is right,” you sniffled.

 “Let me show you how sorry I am,” he grabbed your hip and pulled you to him.

 “You can’t make this better with sex Vada,” you shoved him away and he huffed.

 “Just put this fucking dress on, and tell your boss you’re leaving early,” he thrust a bag at you, from one of those fancy stores he take you to when he wants to spoil you.

 “Fine,” you stormed to your boss’s office and said you were leaving. In the bathroom you changed into the dress and heels, both red with black lace over them. Nevada had good taste, and he knew what you liked. Your makeup was easy enough to fix and you met him in the lobby, still mad.

 “For the lady,” Nevada offered you a single red rose and it softened your anger.

 “Thank you,” you smelled it and tried to hide your smile, “Still mad.”

 “I’ll make it up to you,” he led you to the waiting SUV and ushered you inside. Forty minutes later you were having a private dining experience at the nicest restaurant you’d ever seen. There were candles and dozens of roses in different colors around the table. Dinner was delicious, of course it was, Nevada was a foodie. The whole time he begged your forgiveness, laminating on why he loved you.

 “You’re your own person, you have your own life. You don’t want Trujillo, you want Nevada. You are the sweetest more beautiful and badass mujer I know. I’ll never forget again, lo prometo,” he brushed his lips across your knuckles for the hundredth time since you sat down.

 “How can you promise that,” you looked at him over the candle flames, “How can you be sure?”

 “Because,” he pulled out his phone, “It’s saved in my phone.”

 “You get new phones all the time,” you rolled your eyes.

 “Only family has this number, I keep it. It’s the number you have,” he smiled and put the phone away, pleased with himself.

 “I have all your numbers,” you chuckled and finished off your wine.

 “Am I forgiven,” his warm thumbs traced circles on your hand grasped between his own.

 “Just this once,” you nodded seriously.

 “Good,” he chuckled then his eyes lit up, “I forgot your gift.”

 “A gift,” you pulled your hand back to your lap and tilted your head to the side, “What is it?”

 “Open it,” he pushed a small blue box across the table at you and you raised an eyebrow in response. What you found inside made you gasp. A charm bracelet with three charms was nestled inside, a N, red heart, and your first initial.

 “It’s beautiful Vada,” you leaped across the table and kissed him, nearly singing your hair. He helped you put it on with a shit eating grin.

 “I ordered this last month,” he flipped your wrist over to admire how it looked, “Plenty of room to fill it with more charms.”

 “Thank you Vada baby, I love you,” you rose to your feet and stretched, “Let’s go home.”

 “I love you too, do I get to sleep next to you,” he threw an obscene amount of cash on the table and his men came out of nowhere to carry the roses out to a second SVU.

 “Maybe later,” you purred, “We have anniversary sex and make up sex to have.”

 “Don’t have to tell me twice,” he was scrambling after you with a huge smile, his eyes focused on your sashay.

[raven-writes-requests]

Don’t Leave Me (pt. 2)

Rating: everyone Word count: 1.9 K Fandom: Bungou Stray Dogs Pairing: OC x Dark!Ango Sakaguchi Genre: Angst Warnings: Again, there’s some blood mentions in this chapter. Also, half filler chapter (does that count as a warning?)

___________________________________________________________

He got off her and laid down next to her, closing his eyes and trying to sleep. Unfortunately for him, his mind wouldn’t leave him alone, thoughts of his past coming back to haunt him in the silence of the night.Words he never thought he’ll hear again, voices he thought were buried deep down in his past came back to life. The voices he heard were full of hatred, the images he saw as he closed his eyes were nothing but disturbing. “You’re a monster!” he could hear the woman screaming at him.

“What’s the problem?” a man appeared out of nowhere, his voice confused.

“That… That is not our child, that is a monster!” the weeping woman took the man’s arm, as if shielding herself from the kid, her expression was full of horror at seeing the small boy in such a state.

Ango Sakaguchi was five or six years old when the whole incident happened, being the 12th son in a family of 13 children was hard, food and toys weren’t the only things he had to compete for. The love of his parents was another, possibly more important than the rest of them.

So, the small child, who was now covered in blood from head to toes and was tightly gripping a knife with a grin on his face, felt miserable when he heard the woman he admired and wanted to love him say those things about him.

Why wasn’t she happy? His small hands pushed his huge circular glasses up, so he could see both of them better: his mother was now trembling, her cheeks stained with tears.

“Did I made you sad, mommy?” he asked in an innocent voice that would have been cute, had he not being covered in blood. He looked down at the blood that was pooling around his feet. Its crimson was staining the recently polished wooden floors and his small white socks.

He could feel the wet, hot and sticky liquid soaking through the fabric of his socks. His feet moved around a bit, hating the feeling of getting his feet wet. 

“Don’t call me that! You’re a monster! You’re not my son, you’re the Devil himself!” her high pitched screams got louder, the poor kid could barely understand what was happening.

Ango Sakaguchi was five or six years old when the whole incident happened. He was five or six years old when he realized that his own mother hated him. He was five or six years old his heart broke. Even when seventeen years went by, he could still remember all of the sensations that filled his body as he did that.

The thick warm blood that painted his hands in a deep red, his hands shaking as he committed the act, the way his heart beat out of control, excited and scared at the same time.

He had liked the feeling that killing gave him, but even that couldn’t erase his mother’s horrifying weeps as her eyes were glued into one of her youngest sons.

The years passed by and every time the memory came back to him, there was something that he couldn’t stop, something that he couldn’t shake away. The exciting feeling that came with the aftermath of his actions were exciting to him, it was almost as if he was addicted to it and, the more time he spent without feeling his hands covered in blood, the more impatient he grew.

He never knew exactly why, why was he so desperate to feel that again? Why did he felt so good whenever he felt that? It seemed as if there was no answer at all, at least for the time being. Slowly, his eyes began to open up, the sun hitting him in the eyes waking him from his walk down memory lane. His hands were clenching, clearly affected by the dream he had. His jaw was hurting and that was the clear indicator that he had gritted his teeth while he slept.

He extended his arm, finding the spot next to him empty. Where was she? He got up and put on his glasses, his vision clearing immediately, allowing him to take in his surroundings. His hands opened and closed nervously, like he was ready to kill someone. Where was she when he needed her so desperately?

He got up from the bed and began walking around, his hands desperately needing something to hold on to, his glasses forgotten on the bedside table. “Ango!” he heard the voice he needed so much behind him. He turned around, facing her. Even if he couldn’t see her correctly, he just knew it was her. Without saying a word, he brought her to him and hugged her tightly against his chest. “Where were you?” his voice was low, broken. Showing how weak he was feeling at the moment. “I was just making some coffee.” she answered as she enveloped him in the hug she knew he desperately needed. “Are you okay?” He didn’t answer, he just stood like that. Holding her like she was his lifeline with trembling hands. His nose touching her head, he could feel the soft scent that never failed to relax him when he got like this. He kissed her head and, after quite a long time, he slowly released her.

“I am now.” he smiled as he took a bit of her hair out of her face. “I’ll go take a shower now.” he let her know as he turned around and walked towards the bathroom.

She stood there for a while, quite confused with her boyfriend’s attitude. It wasn’t something out of the ordinary, but it wasn’t normal either.

His hair was dripping wet from his shower when he entered the kitchen again, ready to eat what his girlfriend had cooked with a smile on his face despite of his dream. 

“Will you come back home late again today?” she asked with a soft loving look in her eyes, he felt bad, but the only answer he was able togive her was a shrug of his shoulders.

“I don’t know. You know how crazy the working hours are.” she nodded sadly, making her feel worse for lying in such a way.

“It just… sucks that the government is using you to spy on the mafia in such a way…” the wave of guilt inside of his chest intensified as those words escaped her lips. She had no idea, she wasn’t even suspicious about the lies that he had told her.

She had no idea and just the thought of her waiting hopefully for him to return as if he was a superhero broke his heart farther. He took a deep breath as he forced himself to keep composed. He had lied to her not only for her own safety, but also so she wouldn’t fear him.

The man known to the world as Ango Sakaguchi was walking slowly down the street. His eyes seemed lost behind those two circles of glass he called glasses and they were only focused in the floor in front of him.

“Oh my God! I’m so sorry!” a girly voice exclaimed, then he felt something in his arm. A girl had ran into him, she was holding what looked like a paper map as she blushed, embarrassed. “I’m so sorry, I was trying to figure out where I was and I couldn’t see anything in front of me.” As soon as she looked up at him, he could feel his eyes opening up. The girl in front of him was cute, she was probably a few years younger as well as shorter than himself. Immediately, he could feel himself being drawn by her. What was it? “Do you need help?” he asked before he could stop himself. He was walking towards the mafia headquarters, the first thing he had to do was to get information out of someone by any means necessary. And yet, there he was, wasting his time with a cute smiling girl that he barely knew.

“Yes, I think I’m lost. You see, I just moved here and I was looking for…” he was so distracted by the girl that had landed in his arms that he could barely listen to what she was saying without thinking about how soft and sweet her voice was.

“You were going to work?” she asked and immediately turned red with shame. “Oh my God, I’m so sorry. I wasn’t… I didn’t mean to ask…” she stuttered, even more red.

Ango smiled, her red cheeks making him feel warm inside, something that he wasn’t used to feeling. “It’s okay. Yes, I was on my way to work.” he answered as he began to walk towards the address she had written down in a corner of the map.

The girl’s eyes immediately lit up, she clearly wasn’t expecting such a reaction from him. “Where do you work?” she asked. He panicked, what was he supposed to say? That he was an executive in the most violent mafia in Yokohama?

It took him a few seconds to gather his thoughts and let out a coherent answer. “I work for the government.” he let out. Why did he tell a lie? Why was he so reluctant to tell this unknown girl the truth?

He stopped at a corner with a huge smile on his face. “This is where we have to separate. The place that you were looking for should be that way.” he said as he pointed at his left. The girl suddenly looked really sad. “What is it?” he asked with a curious tone of voice.

“Oh, it’s nothing… I just… “ she sighed, as if he was about to judge her. ”Since I’m new here I was hoping to make some friends and… you’re the first one you has talked to me without sounding annoyed and… I was hoping you could maybe be my friend?” 

No, that was exactly what Ango wanted to avoid. Anyone who wasn’t part of the mafia wasn’t supposed to have any kind of relationship with him. He was supposed to be the scariest member of the mafia, then… Why was he swooning over some girl that he had just met? 

“Of course.” his mouth let the words out again before he was even able to process what he was agreeing to. “I would love to have such a nice girl as my friend.” he said as he smiled at her.

“Thank you so much!” she exclaimed, sounding as happy as a child who got the candy they wanted. “Here.” he took a crumpled piece of paper and wrote a few numbers. “This is my phone number, call me whenever you want to meet up, okay?” he nodded and she smiled. “I’ve got to go now, uhm…” she hesitated.

“Ango… Ango Sakaguchi.” he filled for her.

“I’ve got to go now, Ango. It was nice to meet you!” She turned around and began walking before he could even ask her name, the only thing he had left was a crumpled piece of paper with some random numbers on it. A smile formed on his lips as he watched her walk away, there was something about her… He had no idea what it was, but he was going to find it out.

He looked at the girl who was sitting in front of him and smiled, after all the times he had let her down due to his work, she was still by his side with a smile on her face. Ready to calm him down and put a smile on his whenever he needed it.

[brerediddy]

taking care of you

summary: newt's going on his third day of no sleep when hermann notices that something is wrong. (newmann; h/c & fluff.)

Newton came into the lab a little too bright and chipper for Hermann’s taste. The physicist had all but inhaled two cups of coffee and he was still half-asleep. The apocalypse allowed for no vacations and it was beginning to catch up with him. Hermann wondered why it wasn’t hitting Newton; he’d been working all the same hours—perhaps more, with the few times Hermann had found him tinkering around in the lab during the wee hours of the morning. And yet, here Newton was, as energetic as ever.

Before the shorter man had even reached his own side of the lab, he’d already been speaking a mile a minute about his latest research. Hermann tuned back in on the end of the rambling, trying to focus on his words. “So anyway, if I can just manually reconstruct the DNA into something like a mutation, then I could potentially just find a mature enough cell to get it back into the kaiju. Right? That logic makes sense, doesn’t it?”

Hermann shakes his head to keep up, his chalk-filled hand dropping to his side. “You recognize that I’m not an exobiologist, right?”

“Well, right, but. You usually have some input. I figured today wouldn’t be any different.” Newton peered at him through thick lenses, his eyes narrowing. “You feeling okay?”

“I’m fine, Newton. Just tired.” Hermann pinched the bridge of his nose. “I’m sorry. Let’s try again. Explain your theory one more time, please.”

Newt dove back in with the same excitement in his voice. He was bouncing on his feet and gesturing wildly with his hands. His eyes were wide, green irises shining. After his explanation, Hermann nodded. “Yes. Your logic is sound. At least, from my perspective.”

“Thanks, man,” Newt said. He typed a few lines on his computer, scanning it for errors. Once he was satisfied with his note-taking, he turned back towards Hermann. “So you can’t sleep either?”

“It’s not that, exactly,” he said, making a few marks on the chalkboard. “I sleep plenty. My brain is just tired. It must be from the stress.”

“Yeah, dude, probably. You’ve been working hard.”

“As have you,” Hermann agreed. With that, they lapsed into comfortable silence. Newt put his headphones in, blasting loud guitar riffs and heart-beat drums. Hermann fell into the easy melody of muffled rock n’ roll mixed with scraping chalk. This, he was comfortable with. The stressors could be ignored. Just he and Newton, working separately but together. Every few moments, he picked up on the shuffling of the other man’s rubber gloves or his tapping feet, but it was all a sign of familiarity more than anything else. Even in the end-times, there were small comforts to be had.

After a few hours had passed, Newt took his headphones out. He freed his hands from the blue-stained gloves and crossed the room towards Hermann. “What are you working on?”

Hermann gave him a little hum, placing his chalk on the small metal ledge before explaining. His cane lifted to point out the various sequences of numbers. “I think that if I can take these numbers here and find their connections to the timelines of the attacks, I can understand why they’re choosing the locations that they are.”

“Sounds good,” Newt approved. He looked over the information that the taller man had pointed out, not fully understanding the numbers but knowing enough to make sense of it. He swayed on his feet a little bit while staring up at the tall board, his head feeling airy. Airy. He should get some air.

Newt took a deep breath to steady himself. He was fine. He didn’t need to leave the lab just to make the trek all the way outside. He blinked a few times, clearing away the stars at the edge of his vision.

“Newton?” Hermann’s voice said, seeming far away. Why did he seem so far away?

All at once, he was back to reality. “Yeah, sorry. What?”

“I asked if you were alright.”

“Oh, me? Yeah, dude, I’m fine. Just got a little dizzy. I’m good now.”

Hermann’s brows creased right in the center, like Newt knew they did when he was anxious or frustrated. “When was the last time you ate?” He glanced at the clock, noticing that lunchtime was almost upon them. “I can grab you something if you’d like.”

“No, no, I’m okay.” Newt ran a hand through his hair. He had actually remembered to eat breakfast that morning. He had been up all night, again, but he’d had a nice meal. He didn’t know what else to do with all the time on his hands.

“You’re sure?”

“Positive,” he said. He gave a quick thumbs-up and then turned on his heel to go back to his station. “Just needed to get out of this kaiju for a minute.”

“I understand,” Hermann spoke. He glanced at the lab couch, unoccupied, on the other side of the room. “We should take a break. I could use one, too.”

“Yeah?” Newt asked, noticing the softness in the other man’s voice. He looked back at Hermann, following his visual line to the couch. It did look nice. Besides, a small break couldn’t hurt. The apocalypse would still be there when they returned to their work.

Hermann smiled fondly, taking Newt by the arm. His grip wasn’t tight in any sense of the word—it was more for guidance than anything else. His cane ticked away at the tile floor until they made it to their destination. Newt all but collapsed into the cushions, letting out a long sigh. He’d been on his feet for too long. Ever since he decided against sleep for the third night in a row, he’d been pacing and moving and standing over his specimens.

Hermann watched his lab partner with a careful eye, observing the exhaustion on his features. He lowered himself onto the couch with grace, leaning his cane against the arm. Up close, now, he could see the deep circles under Newton’s eyes. Of course, everyone at the Shatterdome had circles under their eyes. Everyone was always tired and stressed and on the verge of collapse. But Newton hadn’t looked quite this tired before; at least, not in recent memory.

Wordlessly, Newt closed his eyes and tilted his head back against the worn cushions.

Hermann balanced his elbow on the couch’s arm, resting the side of his face in the palm of his hand. He didn’t close his eyes but he did let out a few long breaths to attempt relaxation. “Newton?”

“Yeah, Hermann?” Newt didn’t change his position in order to respond. He opted, instead, to speak to the ceiling with his eyes closed.

“How long has it been since you slept?”

The question caught him off-guard. He hadn’t expected Hermann to notice anything. Usually, the other man was too focused on his own work to think about Newt’s health. Then again, he had asked earlier if the shorter man was alright. He had even offered him food. Hm. Maybe Hermann did care. After a pause, Newt gave a small shrug. “Not really sure.”

“How can you not be sure?” Hermann asked, his posture straightening up in alarm. Newt was going to be the death of him. How a man in his mid-thirties could be so terrible at taking care of himself, he’d never know.

“It’s hard to keep track. All the days keep blending together,” Newt explained. He finally opened his eyes, squinting at the harsh yellow lights of the lab. “I think it’s been three nights. It might be more, but I’m pretty sure I remember getting a few hours before that.”

“ Newton ,” the physicist said sharply. No wonder the other man looked so utterly beat. “You need to sleep.”

“I’m fine. Thanks for the concern, but really. I know how to function without.”

“I don’t doubt that. What I’m worried about is your brain’s ability to function without. Does our K-Science unit not depend on your cognitive abilities?”

“Sleep doesn’t have anything to do with my research.”

“Newton. You’re a biologist , for God’s sake. You should know how important rest is for your brain. What if you fall over into some kaiju blue? Then what happens?”

Newt crossed his arms over his chest, feeling a singe of defiance inside. “It’s not my fault, okay? I wish I could sleep. I just can’t. I’ve made my peace with it and you should probably do the same.”

Hermann gave this pause. He hadn’t considered this. He’d assumed that Newton was forcing himself to stay awake, pushing through his fatigue to continue his research and development. “What do you mean?” His tone was much softer now, eyes fond. He just wanted to help. He wanted the other man to stop looking so fragile, with his pale skin and shaking hands and purple crescent-moons under his eyes.

“I just. I lay there and I can’t get my brain to shut up. I take melatonin but I just keep thinking. Then, even when I’m almost asleep, something will wake me up. I’ll think of something and I can’t afford to lose it, so I need to get up and write it down. Or-Or, I get anxious. I’ll try to forget about the science, but when I do, there’s only one thing left to think about and that’s what’s going to happen if we don’t solve the problem. And then sometimes I have this vision of us at the lab, and a huge kaiju bursts through, and I have to watch you—” Newt stopped himself suddenly, his mouth clamping shut in an almost comical manner. “Sorry. I just. No one’s asked me about this before.”

Hermann was horrified. He hadn’t known that his lab partner was suffering. How had he not noticed before now? He reached out a hand to rest against Newt’s shoulder. He squeezed softly, noticing the way his tense muscles relaxed under the grip. “It’s alright. You’re alright,” he murmured, soft enough just for the two of them.

“I’m alright,” Newt repeated, burying his face in his upturned palms. “Sorry.”

“You needn’t apologize. Everyone struggles sometimes.”

“Not me. I don’t. I do my work and I study what I have to and I’m fine. I’m totally fine. I’m a—”

“Yes, yes, you’re a rockstar,” Hermann interrupted. “I know. Regardless, you still need to take care of yourself. I’ll help you.” He gave a small nod of his head to showcase his willingness to assist the man.

“I don’t understand,” Newt said.

“I’m willing to help. If you want.” Hermann squeezed Newton’s shoulder again. “I could stay with you until you fall asleep.”

“You’d do that for me?” The fondness and surprise in the biologist’s voice was genuine. “I mean, you don’t have to. I don’t want you to waste your time, dude..”

“It wouldn’t be a waste. If you would sleep better with a little help, I want to do what I can.”

“Thanks, Hermann,” Newt replied, a small grin on his face. He yawned and then popped a few knuckles. “Well, I should get back to it. Those genes won’t mutate themselves.”

Hermann cracked a smile that was reserved only for him. “Well, they might.”

Newt propelled himself off the couch and back to his feet, offering a faux salute to Hermann. The physicist gave a little hum of laughter at the motion.

And then Newt was falling to the ground. His eyes closed, his legs gave out, and he collapsed. Hermann moved before he knew that he was moving. He threw himself at his lab partner, collecting him in his arms and bracing for the hard floor against his body. He cradled Newton against his chest and tried to break the fall as best he could. His leg screamed at him in pain but he couldn’t focus on that right now. As he lowered the biologist to the ground, he placed a palm on the side of his face. “Newton. Newton. ”

The moment was agonizing but cut short when Newt stirred. His eyes opened, squinting against the lights. He moved his head slowly to observe his changed position. When he noticed Hermann’s position above him, his brows furrowed. “What’s happening?” he asked. “Why are we on the floor?”

“You collapsed, Newton. Are you alright?” His voice was frantic, not masking any of the concern lying underneath.

“Y-Yeah, I’m okay. I don’t remember falling. I was looking at you and then everything went black.”

“You passed out.” Hermann scanned his lab partner’s features and realized that his palm was still caressing the other man’s face. He removed it quickly. “Let’s get you up.” He placed a hand behind Newt’s back and another on his arm, guiding him. Newt winced at the pain in his head and the stars that seemed to form with the motion. “Slowly. Be careful,” the physicist reminded gently.

“Careful. Got it,” he affirmed. He tried to portray a cool demeanor, but his head hurt so badly. As he got to his feet, Hermann’s arms still keeping him in place, he let out a breath. “Oh, god,” he whispered. “My head, dude.”

“That’s understandable. With the lack of sleep you’ve had, this was bound to happen sooner or later.” The taller man kept his hold on Newton, unwilling to risk another fall. “Let’s get you to bed.”

“No, I’m okay. I just need a minute.” Newt rubbed at his eyes, wavering again with the loss of vision. Hermann’s hands kept him steady, though, and for that he was thankful.

“Absolutely not,” Hermann objected. “You’re going back to your quarters. You need to lie down.”

The shorter man opened his mouth to argue but decided against it after seeing the stern look on the other’s face. He paused before saying, “Yeah, okay.” He blinked, his eyes feeling heavy. Newt felt himself leaning more and more into the physicist’s side involuntarily. In response, Hermann’s arm came up to wrap around his shoulders. Newton was too tired to really consider this, but he made a quick note in the back of his mind to memorize the feeling.

“Alright. Let’s get you to bed,” Hermann said, his voice soft. He was being so gentle. Newt was sure that if he were fully aware of what was happening, he’d be lovesick. At least, more than he already was.

They ambled their way down the hallway, Hermann supporting his own weight and Newt’s on his cane. Once they made it to the biologist’s room, the taller man typed in the passcode.

“How do you know my code?” Newton asked, his eyebrows raised. They crossed over the threshold, his feet moving on their own accord.

“You’ve told me a thousand times that it’s your birthday,” Hermann said dismissively. At the other man’s shocked expression, he added, “I do listen to you sometimes, you know.”

Within the next moment, Newt was sitting on the edge of his bed. Hermann put his cane down, leaning it against the bedpost. He sat down next to the other man and brushed Newton’s hair from his face. “Feeling any better?”

“A little,” the shorter man said softly, his green eyes locked with his lab partner’s. He shook his head enough to clear his mind and said, “Thanks. You didn’t have to do all that for me.”

“Of course I did. Believe it or not, your wellbeing is important to me.”

“I’m fine, really—”

Hermann held up a hand to silence Newt’s protests. “You’re not fine. Had I not been there to catch you, you could’ve seriously injured yourself in the fall.”

“Right, but. Wait. You caught me?” Newton’s face went from a soft fondness into a hard stare. “Hermann Gottlieb, tell me you didn’t.”

“I didn’t want you to further injure yourself. I don’t know what the problem is.”

“Are you okay? Did you hurt your leg? Dude, I’m heavy. Seriously. I don’t care if I’m about to bash my brain in, don’t catch me.” The biologist placed a hand on Hermann’s shoulder, looking at him in absolute earnest. “Promise me you won’t do it again.”

“Newton, I’m fine,” Hermann said, rolling his eyes in a way that was reserved only for the other man. “I didn’t hurt myself,” he lied. “Besides, I didn’t consciously make the decision to catch you. You were falling. My body kicked in far before my mind did.”

The other man peered at him through thick-rimmed glasses. “Fine,” he allowed. “As long as you’re okay. Then...thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Now, back to my original point, Newton; you must take proper care of yourself. I know you said you can’t sleep and I understand that, but this is the point where you must ask for help. You cannot keep going on like this.”

“I didn’t know who to ask. To be honest, I didn’t even think you’d notice that there was a problem in the first place.”

“Newton,” he said, a small edge to his voice. “You really believe that I care so little for you?”

“Well, no, not anymore. I know you care. I mean, Herms, you broke your ass to help me. It’s just that before...you know. I thought I was kind of a nuisance to you.”

Hermann shook his head. “You were never. I appreciate your partnership and I value your company. I’m sorry that I didn’t make you aware of that sooner.”

“No, dude, I should be apologizing to you for making you worry and ruining your day in the lab.”

“You’ve ruined nothing,” Hermann assured him, the hint of a smile on his lips. “Now, what do you say we get you into bed?”

“All you had to do was ask,” Newton quipped, offering a small wink to the other man. The physicist rolled his eyes yet again.

The biologist began working on his tie, trying to undo the knot that had been so thoroughly embedded in the material. Normally, he was able to simply slip it on and off, but the wear and tear of the fabric was proving to be an issue. He struggled with it for a minute more before Hermann’s long fingers interfered.

“Let me,” he said, tone quiet and eyes focused on the task at hand. He worked at the knot with patience until it was finally loose enough to come undone. Newt could feel his face heating up at the closeness of their contact, but he simply stayed still and watched the process. Finally, when the man was free of the tie, Hermann placed it on the nightstand with great care.

Newt slowly removed his shirt, not finding it in himself to be insecure around the other man. In sharing a space for so many years along with their fair share of lab accidents, he didn’t have much to hide anymore. The white shirt came off, crumpled, and Newton threw it to the ground with absolutely no regard. He slipped his pants off in the same manner which left him in only his flame-patterned boxers. He found himself sitting next to the fully clothed physicist, but he didn’t have the energy to think much of it. “Much better,” he mumbled before standing up and walking around to the other side of the mattress. Unceremoniously, he lifted the covers up and climbed underneath. As soon as his head hit the pillow, he could feel the exhaustion seeping into his brain.

“There you are,” Hermann murmured, his palm flattening out the duvet on top of Newt’s chest. “You just need to get some proper rest.”

“Thanks, man,” Newton said, his eyes closing on their own volition.

“No need to thank me. I’ll stay here until you’re asleep.”

Newton smiled a little bit at that, blinking his eyes open. Half-lidded, he tilted his head towards the other man. “Might be a while. You can take some of the bed, too, y’know. More comfortable.”

“Perhaps I will,” the taller man spoke, looking at his lab partner with nothing short of adoration. He shifted his position on the bed until his back was propped up against the headboard and his legs stretched out in front of him. Next to him, Newt crept a little bit closer.

The biologist asked, “You promise you won’t let a kaiju in here?”

A tiny huff of laughter at the request, and then, “Of course not. Nothing can hurt you while I’m around.”

“Not worried about me,” Newt corrected, closing his eyes again. “I can take ‘em. Just don’t want anything to happen to you.”

“Nothing is going to happen to me,” Hermann promised. On an impulse, he placed a hand on top of Newt’s head, his fingers carding through the thick hair that was once perfectly styled. “Get some sleep, Newton.”

“You’re too good to me, Herms,” the shorter man hummed, barely above a whisper. He was breathing more steadily now.

“Nothing’s too good for you. You deserve the best.”

Within the next few moments, a couple of light snores slipped from the sleeping man. His head turned in his sleep, subconsciously searching for Hermann. The physicist removed his fingers from the man’s hair and shifted so that his shoulder was down at Newton’s level. In mere seconds, his head found its way onto the surface. He cuddled into Hermann with a contented sigh.

Hermann had planned on leaving the man in peace once he finally drifted off, but he couldn’t go now. No, not when Newton looked like that. He was so pliant and relaxed and...cute, for lack of a better word. It wouldn’t hurt to stay a little longer. Besides, what if Newt woke up and needed him? He should stay.

The warmth and comfort emitting from the sleeping biologist lulled Hermann into a relaxed state, his eyes slowly closing. A little nap couldn’t hurt.

As he fell asleep, Hermann considered the man next to him. He felt a strange warmth in his chest, looking over at him. He’d known for a while that he had more affection for the biologist than was normal, but this was new. The other man had been sweet and appreciative and happy. In that moment, he decided that there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do for Newton. He’d follow him to the ends of the earth. And perhaps even more than that, if it’s what he needed.

[fineillsignup]

Taking Chakra Nature to 11: some headcanons

Buckle up because it’s gonna be a long ride.

So one of the things that makes Naruto so attractive as a fandom (as opposed to as a franchise) is that there’s all this tantalizing potential that was never realized, just waiting for someone to pick it up and expand on it. In particular, some writers are worldbuilders by nature and some are just not. (Tolkien would be an example of a extremely worldbuilding-focused writer.) Kishimoto is in the “just not” category.

Chakra nature is a great example of a part of the Naruto world that could be taken up to eleven. Why? Well, there’s the good old “why not” reason, which is sufficient in itself, but also, people just love categorization. There’s a reason why people always want to sort themselves for Hogwarts houses, endlessly prattle about zodiac signs, and why the Naruto databooks include bloodtype. But they don’t! Include! Chakra nature!!!!

That’s frankly ludicrous. The chakra natures in the corner merely indicate which chakra natures that person can utilize, not which is their own nature; this isn’t very helpful because some people like Kakashi can use all five. Moreover, one of the very major characters of the franchise--the anti-hero, Sasuke--is shown to be fire natured yet to largely prefer lightning techniques, making it clear that chakra nature is not 1-to-1 correlated with someone’s most frequent jutsu.

And it’s not like Kishimoto would have had to do a huge amount of work coming up with chakra nature connections to personality and society, because these five elements already exist as a powerful Japanese cultural concept. 

He simply needed to connect that to the Naruto world and its characters.

But I guess I need to do all the work around here! :3c

Regarding kekkei genkai--I headcanon that even people with kekkei genkai have a primary nature, but you could also combine two natures instead.

Earth Nature (Earth, Dirt, Stone) 地 and 土

Examples of Canon Characters: ??? (I don’t think we’re ever explicitly told that a character is earth nature, although many characters use earth release) Examples of Headcanon Characters: Haruno Sakura, Oonoki, Deidara, Suigetsu, Sasori Personality Traits (not all found in each person obviously): Stable, stubborn, inflexible, endurance, short-tempered, wise, reliable, responsible, sense of perspective, patient, centred, literal Common Body Types: Mesomorphic (muscular); may be lean or broad; shorter than average (closer to hell); blunt fingers (but often surprisingly deft and precise) Climate Interactions: Earth natured people tolerate both heat and cold pretty well. When it’s cold they dress warmly and when it’s hot they dress for that too. Sensible. Japanese symbol: square; Naruto uses the kanji 土 rather than 地 for some reason; they both mean earth and the differences are too subtle to go into briefly Why does earth dominate water/water enhance earth? Earth stops the flow of water and can control its shape. Water can imbue earth with more weight and power, including fertile power. What does this mean for the Land of Earth? “That’s the way we’re going to do it. We’ve always done it that way.” The Land of Earth in my headcanon was the last and slowest great nation to centralize/organize, however, slow and steady may win the race as it has had very little internal conflict. Other Notes: Earth nature? In my Sakura? It’s more likely than you think.

Kakashi did the chakra nature test when Sakura wasn’t around and then, as far as we can tell, never even bothered to find out what hers was???? LOLsob. Tertiary materials like games usually make Sakura water natured, but I prefer earth nature for her. She definitely can use earth jutsu. Her personality, strengths and flaws, seems to fall along earth lines rather than water lines. In addition, I just like the balance of Team 7 when Sasuke and Naruto are fire-wind and Sakura is across the circle at earth; most of my headcanon teams follow that kind of pattern.

“Okay, but Suigetsu? Earth nature? Now you’re just fucking with us.” Not at all; I’m going after one of Kishimoto’s own weird choice to constantly remind us that Suigetsu is weak to lightning. Now I’m sure that Kishimoto just meant “if lightning strikes water you’re in for a bad time” and nothing deeper than that, but in the five elements pattern of domination, it’s earth that is weak against lightning jutsu.

There’s no reason Suigetsu can’t be an earth natured person who specializes in water jutsu, anymore than Sasuke’s fire nature stops him from specializing in electric jutsu. Perhaps, and this is all headcanon but it’s fun so just try and stop me, it is Suigetsu’s earth chakra nature that helps keep his body from completely falling apart and dissipating while he’s performing his unique ability to turn into water?

Water Nature 水

Examples of Canon Characters: Tobirama Examples of Headcanon Characters: Sai, Kisame, Hashirama, Kabuto, Personality Traits: Adaptable, flexible, progressive, curious, reactive, emotional, mutable, gullible, empathic, unstable, resilient, morose, sensitive Common Body Types: Endomorphic (soft, higher in body fat); taller than average; long-limbed with flexible joints; larger hands and feet with tapered digits Climate Interactions: Poor water nature people. They hate heat. They hate cold. They hate humidity. They hate super dry environments. Basically, they are volatile and easily bothered by all kinds of things, including temperature and climate. Japanese symbol: Circle Why does water dominate fire/fire enhance water? Water douses flame, obviously. Fire can turn water into steam, expanding its range and potential. What does this mean for the Land of Water? Oh my God, is the Land of Water ever volatile in canon! This can be bad obviously (hello, kekkei genkai genocide) but it doesn’t necessarily have to be so. The Land of Water went within about a dozen years from mass genocide of kekkei genkai to having a leader with two kekkei genkai (the criminally underused Terumi Mei). There’s no inertia here. You can’t ever relax, but you can potentially really change things, including people’s hearts and minds. Other Notes: none at the moment

Fire Nature 火

Examples of Canon Characters: Sasuke, Madara, Itachi, Obito, THE UCHIHA Examples of Headcanon Characters: Tsunade, Orochimaru, Jiraiya, Hiruzen (aka gee I wonder if drama will happen here); Guy Personality Traits: Passionate, reforming, self-righteous, ambitious, driven, creative, focused, confident, fragile, extreme, energetic, motivated, tenacious, greedy, proud, idealistic, resentful Common Body Types: Ectomorphic (lean); high metabolism; average height; great skin and hair (because of their great circulation); either super healthy or near death, no in-between Climate Interactions: Fire people are always hot. They are the people who wear shorts all year round and start a revolution with their tiddies out (yes I’m looking at you Sasuke). They are not particularly bothered by external weather. Japanese symbol: Triangle Why does fire dominate wind/wind enhance fire? Fire consumes air and becomes stronger, like canon tells us. What does this mean for the Land of Fire? I headcanon that because of its central location on the map and prosperity, the Land of Fire has the most diverse population in terms of chakra natures, so while fire nature is the majority there are still a larger number of other natures than most countries. (From a meta perspective, this also makes it more fun to write a Konoha-centric story.) However, the Will of Fire and Konoha’s idealism is a definite Big Mood and something that other nations notice. Other Notes: I imagine that this element is most likely to be the chakra nature of those whose bloodline abilities are strongly connected with Yang Release.

Wind Nature (Wind, Air) 風

Examples of Canon Characters: Y’already know who it is!!! (blaring air horn) Oh and Asuma. Examples of Headcanon Characters: Temari, Baki, Gaara, Chiyo Personality Traits: Free-spirited, distractible, innovative, unorthodox, open, relaxed, compassionate, empathetic, benevolent, charitable, loving, evasive, passive-aggressive, impulsive, withdrawn, avoidant, penetrating Common Body Types: Lean or muscular, average to short Climate Interactions: Throw on a shirt, and then a sweatshirt over the shirt and a cloak around the sweatshirt because wind people are always cold. “Cold hands, warm heart” often applies to them. They like heat and aren’t bothered by humidity or dryness. Japanese symbol: Crescent Why does wind dominate lightning/lightning enhance wind? Well, it doesn’t, because lightning as an element makes no sense. But void, on the other hand, does. Void is a vacuum, and air rushes to fill a vacuum without itself being harmed by the vacuum. What does this mean for the Land of Wind? Wind people have a lot of openness and caring but also voted Most Likely to Sulk for a Hundred Years When Things Go Wrong. The Land of Wind in canon appears to be the least naturally rich in the essentials of life (water, food, etc), and to have the most dickish daimyo, so it’s kind of unsurprising that the Wind leadership collectively got hella depressed after their one bad idea after another failed. Other Notes: They say in canon that the wind chakra nature is “rare” but I’m headcanoning that this just means “rare in the Land of Fire”.

Lightning (Electricity, Void, Vacuum, Nothingness) 雷 or 空

Examples of Canon Characters: Kakashi Examples of Headcanon Characters: Hinata, Neji, Shikamaru, Darui, Sakumo, Killer Bee Personality Traits: Mysterious, thoughtful, reflective, fatalistic, imperturbable,  spontaneous, quick, detached, aware, intuitive, selfless, passive, negative, wise, analytical, elegant, eccentric Common Body Types: Most diversity in body type Climate Interactions: The least bothered by external temperatures. Aware of them, but probably dresses however regardless. Japanese symbol: Jewel-shape Why does lightning dominate earth/earth enhance lightning? Again, it only makes sense if the element is void or vacuum. While air filling a vacuum is essentially unharmed, earth-y substances don’t handle decompression well. (Imagine if Lightning Release could be used for explosive decompression based jutsu... now that’s scary.) What does this mean for the Land of Lightning? “We’re talking about the issues but we’re keeping it funky” is a line from Flight of the Conchords, but it is also how I imagine a culture that is majority Lightning-nature people best functioning. Other Notes: none at the moment

All of the above is just some ideas to play with! And of course there’s the pondering about how chakra nature is passed on--is it genetic? Epigenetic (traits that can be switched on or off by environmental factors)? Do two people who have children together pass on the more dominant nature? Is that perhaps why Wind nature is rarest in the Land of Fire (because Fire and Wind parents will always pass on Fire)? What are the chakra nature patterns in the little countries?

Feel free to play with my ideas, expand, change them, whatever! No need for credit if you do.

[sniperjoey]

The Withering Popularity of Orange Juice

I recall once being told when I was little that orange juice can be used as a barometer to tell how the economy is doing. At that time, I didn't really realize what my mom meant. After all, what eight-year-old has any sort of cohesive grasp on the economy? Orange juice is something that I grew up with. As a child, I was convinced that orange juice was and would always be around forever, and that everyone in the history of the world drank it for breakfast. I took it for granted for most of my life, overestimating its permanence entirely. Once it stopped magically showing up in my family's fridge, I realized what I had been missing out on. Apparently, orange juice is a commodity, the popularity of which is on the decline. And it doesn’t look too a-peel-ing.

          Actually, orange juice is a fairly recent invention. Well, the way we drink it is. People have been drinking the juice of squashed fruits for ages. It was a pain to keep fresh, and was only considered a luxury item at the time. Because of that, oranges were almost always eaten whole, instead of being turned into juice. It was just easier that way. "The model for production and consumption of bottled orange juice was similar to fresh milk: it must be locally produced and locally consumed" (Newman 135).

 In order to make orange juice a viable breakfast option, ”From Concentrate" orange juice was invented during World War II, during a time when the economy was better, people had more time, and money had more value. The only way to preserve it before that was to boil it and can it, which allegedly ruined the taste entirely (Ferdman). From Concentrate orange juice revolutionized production, increased shelf life, and made it possible for it to be shipped and traded in huge quantities. Sales skyrocketed, and orange juice could be found in nearly every picture-perfect commercial breakfast lineup ever. However, lately things haven't been looking so great for our favorite breakfast drink. The orange juice market has been on a steady decline since the 90's, for an array of reasons that just keep building.

          First off, years and years of advertising has built up orange juice as the perfect accompaniment to a 'well-balanced breakfast'. Chances are, when you hear "orange juice" you think of breakfast. There's no clear answer as to why, but some people speculate that it's because the sugar and acidic citrus flavor wakes up the senses. Whatever the reason, orange juice has been advertised as nothing but a breakfast food for as long as anyone can remember, and that indelible label on orange juice's role in the average person's diet is doing it no good.

 Today's ideals concerning food specifically have changed drastically from what they were back in the day. Younger adults specifically are skipping out on breakfast these days, and also avoiding sugar. These go hand in hand, as a lot of breakfast foods are very high in sugar, orange juice included. In fact "Some 89% of American adults ate breakfast back in 1971, according to data from the National Health and Nutrition Examination Surveys. As of 2002, that number has fallen to 82%, and is likely lower now" (Ferdman).  Most likely due to a rising sense of urgency in today’s economy, working folks are too focused with an on-the-go lifestyle to sit down and enjoy a meal to start off their day.

Life today is much faster paced than it was in the days following WWII, with the advent of technology making everything easier, yet also harder. No one has time for breakfast anymore, usually opting instead for the convenience of eating something small yet calorically dense, and washing it down with coffee. As a result, the long standing iconography of a perfect breakfast that includes orange juice has been falling apart for years. Allow me to make side note about coffee. It has long since overtaken orange juice as the most popular breakfast drink, and it makes sense as to why. There are about a million variations on the bitter brew, and its caffeine packed punch guarantees a burst of energy, compared to orange juice’s sugar fueled rush. Plus, it’s incredibly accessible and plentiful across the globe.

On top of that, we've come full circle on our methods of procuring orange juice. Ferdman claims in his article How America fell out of love with Orange Juice, "Increasingly, consumers seem to be accepting the challenge posed by the 1980s Minute Maid tagline: “For juice that tastes fresher, you’ll have to squeeze it yourself.”'  All of this contributes to the fact that the amount of orange juice purchased shrinks a little more every year.

          As if that wasn't bad enough, there's also a disease that's killing off a huge percentage of oranges around the world. It's garnered enough reputation around the world to be known by many names, one of which is Yellow Dragon disease. If it wasn't killing off my favorite fruit, I would say that it sounds pretty cool. In most cases though, it's called Citrus Greening. Not only does it make nasty little fruits that are entirely inedible, it eventually kills off the whole tree. 

        The disease has actually been around for centuries, but it's only gotten really bad within the last two decades. "The disease hit south Florida in 2005. Scientists now believe just about every orange grove in the state of Florida is infected" (Ferdman). At this point, it's affecting almost every orange orchard in the entire world, and scientists haven't figured out how to effectively stop it. In fact, the disease spreads so easily that even wind and tools that have been used near infected trees can spread it. Pesticides don't even seem to be making a dent, despite the carrier of the disease being infected insects. As the USDA states, "While the disease poses no threat to humans or animals, it has devastated millions of acres of citrus crops throughout the United States and abroad" (USDA). The use of pesticides and the questions that it brings up is a topic for another essay. Said disease also causes the trees to drop their fruit more often. As if having pathetic, shriveled fruit wasn't bad enough, now there's less fruit overall that have the chance to make it to juicehood. Scientists are considering turning to genetic modification as a last attempt to stave off the disease, but the use of GMOs is so widely frowned upon in today's society that even if it did manage to kill off Citrus Greening, the market might still take a hit.

           You may be asking, “Didn’t you say something about a barometer?” With consumption falling and prices rising, the future of orange juice doesn't look too great. Orange juice is a commodity, and one that's already wildly unstable. Not only is it a seasonal crop, but on top of that, it often has to compete with natural disasters. For example, the trade for Orange juice is really good in November, when traders are anticipating frosts and other damaging weather events during the winter. That all goes away once winter passes, starting typically in February (Newman 136). The resulting prices can vary wildly. Now that orange juice is suffering, its prices are rising consistently. Lack of interest is compounded by the aforementioned change in the ideals of buyers. The falling rate of consumption means prices rise to compensate. Due to the damages done to orange juice's stability in the global trade, it's unlikely that it can be used to judge anything other than the weather in Florida.

          The orange juice industry has been dropping like oranges from an infected tree. The decline of a commodity that's been as prevalent in daily life as breakfast itself raises more than a few questions. Will the rapidly approaching end be permanent? Does this say anything about us as consumers? I propose that this is merely the tail end of a long swell of production and consumption, not the death of the industry. We're slowly but surely leaving behind the age of 'yesterday's news.' Young adults in America are realizing that they can break free of the precedents set for them by the last few generations, and as a result, ideals and standards are changing drastically everywhere you look. The slow but sure fall of the orange juice industry might not spell doom for the once-common breakfast beverage, but it may very well be a warning as to what awaits other commodity markets on the horizon. As for orange juice, it might just be time to say goodnight to our favorite 'good morning'.

sources:

Newman, Kara. The Secret Financial Life of Food : From Commodities Markets to Supermarkets. Columbia University Press, 2013. Accessed November 2018

Clay, Jason W. World Agriculture and the Environment : A Commodity-By-Commodity Guide to Impacts and Practices. Island Press, 2004. Accessed November 2018

Ferdman, Roberto A. How America Fell Out of Love With Orange Juice. Quartz. February 26 2014. https://qz.com/176096/how-america-fell-out-of-love-with-orange-juice/ Accessed November 10 2018

Citrus Greening. United States Department of Agriculture. https://www.aphis.usda.gov/aphis/resources/pests-diseases/hungry-pests/the-threat/citrus-greening/citrus-greening-hp Accessed November 19 2018

Hopkinson, Jeremy. USDA expects quick approval for genetically engineered virus to combat citrus greening disease in Florida. Politico. November 20, 2017 https://geneticliteracyproject.org/2017/11/20/usda-expected-quickly-approve-genetically-engineered-virus-combat-citrus-greening-disease-florida/

Accessed December 13 2018

[fanders-fic-awards]

Conspiracy (Summer Fic Comp 18)

Summary: Virgil is behaving slightly strangely and Logan refuses to accept its because of the reason that Virgil gives him. Queer-platonic Analogical

Trigger Warnings: Slight angst. Ends with fluff

Words: 1824

Ballot

Logan sighs, pinching the brow of his nose as he looked at the scene before him.

 ‘What on earth could have possibly led someone to do this? More importantly, who is this someone?’

A number of quilt covers had been tied together and now hung from the ceiling light with string. Causing the material to cascade down in the form of a pyramid. Books had been placed on the bottom of the quilt in order to keep it in place, though Logan could see a pole, moving around inside the enclosure, flailing wildly as curses could be heard alongside it.

‘Ah, swearing. It’s Virgil.’

“Do I want to know what’s going on?” Logan called out. 

Virgil’s head soon popped out of the tent, pouting at the logical side. His face was red and flustered, it was obvious that he had been fighting with the pole for some time. But that was not the thing which shocked Logan the most.

 “Is that… a metal colander on your head?”

 “…Aliens.”

 “Excuse you?”

“The aliens are coming. I’m preparing.”

 “The existence of aliens is untenable, it’s illogical to prepare for something that is likely never to happen.”

 “Not entirely sure what untenable means, but by the same logic isn’t the argument that aliens don’t exist also ‘untenable’?”

 Logan had no response, he just stared at the other side in concern.

 Virgil sighs “Can you just- can you help me? As soon as I have this pole up you can leave me and my stupid nationalities be.”

 “I never called you stupid-”

 Virgil’s head duck back into the tepee “Shut up nerd, hurry up and get in here.”

Something about Virgil’s tone, his reluctance to meet Logan’s gaze throughout the conversation, left Logan’s stomach swirling. Something was wrong. If this had happened in the past, Logan may have shrugged it off, excusing himself from the issue by thinking it was Virgil’s problem not his, but his time with all the sides, especially the anxious one had changed that mindset. For Thomas to function it was necessary for them to all contribute in each area and the thought of his new-found friend being in distress perturbed him greatly. Logan clenched his fist and walked towards the tent. He was determined to not let Virgil down again.

**

The pole had turned out to be the parasol from their garden table, Virgil was hoping to open it against the top of the quilt, allowing more room in the tent. The two sides spent another agonising five minutes trying to do this, and Logan began to appreciate why Virgil was cursing while trying to do it himself. Once they finally succeeded, however, Virgil flopped onto the pile of pillows and blankets with a sigh of exhaustion.

Logan took this moment to take in the interior. One side of the tent was filled to the brim with every soft thing imaginable, Logan noted a few of his own items in the pile and made a mental reminder to discuss with Virgil his habits as a hoarder and thief. Next to the pile, there was a stock of food and beverages, mainly energy drinks and salty snacks, though Logan was relieved to also see some fruit and a huge bottle of water as well. Finally, on the other side of the tent was a small box with Virgil’s laptop sitting on it. There was a second battery pack next to it, and the screen was already on, with numerous tabs opened.

 “So… what exactly are you planning on doing in here?” Logan questioned as he turned back round to the anxious side.

 “Can’t figure that out for yourself, Sherlock?”

 Logan huffed “Well, of course I already know. I’m asking you to confirm my obviously correct suspicions.”

 “Can it be a suspicion if it’s obviously correct?”

 “Well, a suspicion can only be either be right or wrong-”

 “But not obvious. Suspicion requires a level of deduction. If something is obvious then no investigative prowess is needed.”

Logan scowled slightly in frustration. Virgil’s ability to debate with him was so anger-inducing at times, but on the other hand, it was something which Logan really appreciated. He still wasn’t entirely sure how such a duality could exist, but he accepted it begrudgingly. “Just tell me, Virgil.”

“…I’m going to sit here, watch conspiracy theories and hopefully maybe cease to exist.” 

“You’d think as anxiety that you would probably fear your own demise.” 

Virgil shifted back onto the pillow pile, uncomfortable with the direction of the conversation. “Think what you want. You’re free to go by the way”

“I think I’ll stay.” 

“What?”

“You’re planning on watching conspiracy theories. I’ll need be here to point out the flaws so that they do not cause you distress.”

“Oh.” There was a hint of disappointment in Virgil’s voice at Logan’s explanation. “Well, yeah, sure. You can stay.”

“Thank-you” Logan nodded and moved toward the pillows. As he sat down he continued “Besides, I also have to make sure you also don’t end up actually ceasing to exist. We already know we’d be lost without you. 

Virgil could feel the red rise to his cheeks “…o-oh.”

**

For the first documentary, the two had sat a respectful distance apart.

During the second the two had unconsciously shifted closer, Virgil leaning so his head rested on Logan’s shoulder, which was slightly uncomfortable considering he still had a colander on his head.

At the start of the third Virgil went for a bathroom break. When he returned he slotted himself in between Logan’s legs, the logical side wrapping his arms around him. Slowly as Virgil became immersed by the show Logan removed the colander and quietly placed it to the side. He began to comb his fingers through Virgil’s hair, the other yawned and sank further into the embrace.

As the third documentary ended Virgil attempted to get up and start a fourth, though Logan refused to let him go. Just as he was about to question the logical side, Logan came out with a question of his own:

“What’s the real reason for all of this, Virgil?”

Virgil angled his neck to try and look at Logan, shocked by his words “I already told you, al-“

“I know that’s not it.” 

“Oh, yeah?” Virgil raised an eyebrow in amusement “What makes you say that, Nancy Drew?”

“If you were really concerned about aliens you wouldn’t have let me remove that colander without a fight.” 

Logan could feel the other tense up, a hand was thrown to his hair and, when realising he was indeed no longer wearing the kitchen utensil, the anxious side let out a string of curses. Logan huffed, smiling at the reaction a little, though he soon hugged the boy tighter, looking off into the distance.

“I hate it when people lie. Well… that’s not exactly right. I hate it when you lie, Virgil, because it’s never a lie to protect yourself, but a lie to try and protect the rest of us. You feel the need to carry all your burdens, all of Thomas’ bad thoughts on yourself. Please… you can trust me to handle the truth.”

As soon as Logan heard the other’s breath hitch his head snapped back down. Tears were streaming down Virgil’s face as he tried to furiously wipe them away, while also trying to control his breath.

“Hey…hey it’s okay. Just let it all out. I’ll be here.” Logan felt a tug on his arms, realising that Virgil may not want to be touched right now he released his grip. He was about to apologise profusely for not letting go as soon as he realised Virgil’s mental state, but he was instead tackled into a hug. As they fell back onto the pillows, Logan brought his head to rest on top of Virgil’s, whispering assurances as he once again stroked his hair. Virgil continued to sob loudly into Logan’s chest, his clenched fists full of the logical sides’ shirt.

Eventually, Virgil’s breathing began to slow down, and weakly he sat back up. He continued to wipe the last of the tears as he spoke, his voice still hoarse from all his wailing “I’m sorry. That…that was a lot of stuff.” 

Logan sat up as well, his features softening at Virgil’s words. “Why didn’t you say something?”

“I gue- I- I’m just so used to keeping it all in. It used to be fine before because I had that strong, evil persona. It acted more like a dam than a wall, it kept stuff from getting out rather than coming in… though I really don’t appreciate ‘Mr. Cold-as-a-Robot’ trying to take the moral high ground while speaking about keeping emotions locked away.”

Logan chuckled “Fair enough. I used to think feelings got in the way, and so I did ignore them, for far too long. But I’m getting better.” He looked up to Virgil “That’s thanks to you, you know.”

Virgil’s eyes widened “What?”

Logan smiled “Your quiet nature… has led you to be quite observant. My observations were purely goal-based, I focused on what I needed to know. But you were so… holistic. You took in everything and as such you noticed even the subtlest of changes. You could tell exactly what I was feeling, even when I wasn’t sure myself, and you took actions accordingly. I mean, you tried to do it so nonchalantly so that we wouldn’t notice how much you cared. But I saw.”

Virgil had turned bright red at this point, stammering out his response “Wha- wh- why are- you bringing this up?” 

“I don’t thank-you enough. Thank-you Virgil. For being here.” 

Virgil’s whole body began to shake, his eyes shimmering with new tears “Goddammit. Don’t make me cry again.”

“Sorry. I’ll end it on this note: Next time you’re feeling down come to one of us. Don’t try and seek comfort in something like this, we want to be there for you too.”

Virgil swallowed before he nodded “Yeah, whatever you say.”

“Trying to hide behind a nonchalant attitude again I see. You’ll never learn.” Logan teased

Virgil laughed “Alright, I’m sorry.” He paused for a second, his hands delving into his pockets, his shoulders rising before he asked “Can- can we carry on watching something though? I was kind of enjoying…this.”

“Of course, we can. Though perhaps we could watch a space documentary instead? If I have to hear about crop circles one more time I’m going to throw one of your energy drink cans at your laptop.”

Virgil snorted “Yeah, just give me a sec, I have a few bookmarked.” He shuffled over to the laptop and with a few clicks, the sound of Neil deGrasse Tyson’s voice filled the tent. As he turned around, Logan had rearranged the cushions back to their previous positions and he was now draped in one of the blankets. Virgil fitted himself back in front of Logan and the logical arms embraced him once again. He stifled a yawn as he relaxed back into his friend.

‘Thanks for coming to help, Logan’

@anxious-baby-nightmare

[danbily]

Goodbye Vietnam

This is a true story about a winter camping trip that I went on.

As a chubby little boy, I was the perfect fit for Cub Scouts. We built birdhouses, sang silly songs, and, best of all, baked cookies. What I lacked in ambition was more than offset by the snacks at the end of each weekly meeting. My small blue uniform was stretched to its limits as I neared the end of my tour of duty. It was time to move on to Boy Scouts.    

My first night at Boy Scouts was shockingly different from Cub Scouts. Mr. Cordy, our scoutmaster, made us suck in our guts as we stood at attention in a straight line while he inspected our uniforms. My scarf tie was on crooked and I could feel that Mr. Cordy was unhappy about my chubby physique. “You will benefit from our exercise program, young man,” was his terse remark as he departed for the next scout in line. I knew then that we were not ending this meeting with cookies and milk, and I was right.

My pack included my best friend, Charlie, my neighbor, Art, my fellow Cub Scout, Paul, and Donny. Donny was the son of our pack supervisor, Mr. Lynn, who’d been an officer in World War II. In addition to our regular troop meeting at the new rec center, we would often meet at their home. The Lynns owned one of the first color TVs in 1958. We would all gather around it and gaze in amazement at actual color film. We compared it to our drab black and white sets at home and laughed. Mrs. Lynn would make us snacks as well. It was so much better than a troop meeting with mean Mr. Cordy.

Just after the New Year, Mr. Lynn announced that he together with Mr. Cordy were planning a winter father-son campout. Each pack would pick their own date and camp just south of Holland, New York, a town known for its lake effect snow.

I was eager to test out my new scout-approved, two-man tent that I’d earned by selling Boy Scout Christmas cards. It was a canvas tent complete with poles, stakes, and a canvas floor. It also had a mosquito net door that would be a nice feature in the summer. The only thing I lacked was an air mattress for the underside of my sleeping bag. My dad and I needed to go shopping for air mattresses as soon as possible.      

The following Saturday, we visited our local sporting goods shop. It was located in a small plaza and had a limited selection. The clerk showed us an air mattress made in France, but made no personal recommendation; he fully admitted that he wasn’t into camping. My father ultimately bought two of the ugly blue contraptions. The clerk smirked as he rang them up on the register. I knew this wasn’t a good omen. On the drive home, I opened one of the boxes and tried to read the instructions. My dad looked over at me in disgust. “Don’t they teach you kids how to read at that school I pay hefty taxes to send you to? Hand me those instructions.” I did as requested and my father pulled over to the curb. After a minute, he turned to me. “Damn things are written in French,” he said. “Mom can read Polish,” I said, “Is that close?” Needless to say, it wasn’t. We struggled with the few crude drawings and I understood why the clerk had smirked.

The week of the camping trip was filled with the promise of a new adventure in my young mind. I loved watching Walter Cronkite and The Twentieth Century on Sunday evenings. The film footage of the mighty German army grinding to a halt outside Moscow in the brutal Russian winter was a fresh memory. Would our pack succumb to the same fate in the heavy snow south of Buffalo? Then there was my image of Napoleon sitting inside the Kremlin, burning furniture in order to keep warm. Was Mr. Lynn aware of just how awful George Washington had it during that winter at Valley Forge? As an officer from our military, I hoped he was well versed in the hardships of a winter campout, especially one that involved the greenest of troops known as the Boy Scouts.

That Saturday arrived with clear skies and bountiful sunshine for our two hour drive to Scout camp.  We had six carloads in all, as many of the fathers had volunteered to accompany their sons on this make believe Arctic adventure. The local weather forecast never came up in conversation. The radio stations were all based in Buffalo and would not have mentioned any snow this far south of the city. It was still sunny and birds were chirping as we unloaded our camping supplies in the parking lot. We had two toboggans with tow ropes for our tents. Our cooking gear and food was in our Scout regulation knapsacks. We all opted for snowsuits and rubber boots versus any regulation uniform, a wise choice for this ragtag little army of greenhorns. Mr. Lynn took out his map and pointed to a trail leading from the edge of the parking lot to a wooded hillside. “Boys, I mean MEN, we will proceed this way.”

The snow had been packed down on the trail from previous use. It wasn’t difficult to follow. We found a tree sheltered hillside after a one hour hike. Mr. Lynn and Art, our only Eagle Scout, declared that we’d “arrived at encampment.”  I personally felt it had more to do with the heavy wheezing now coming from many of the fathers prone to smoking. We were assigned small areas and told to pitch our tents and help with a general mess area for our evening meal. The snowpack was shoveled clear in a twenty foot circle and we started a fire in the middle. We went on a scavenger hunt for every downed tree limb on that hillside. Our fire soon blazed like a blast furnace and our bodies cooked on one side and froze on the other. I understood why the Indians had danced around the fire, they were simply rotating in the heat like chickens on a spit.

The evening meal consisted of beans and weiners emptied from large institutional cans into a five gallon enameled steel cooking pot. We made Scout biscuits by rolling a twig in Bisquick and water. After a dough ball had formed on the end of the twig, it was held over the fire until it turned light brown. We enjoyed the folly of keeping the biscuits on the twig and out of the fire. You either mastered the technique or ate only beans and weiners. I ended up the expert in this bizarre food misadventure and became camp baker for the less able. I must have baked three dozen biscuits that evening. They were served with huge slices of butter. Rounding out our frontier dinner party was hot chocolate and Hostess cupcakes. We all liked to suck out the cream filling first, then eat the frosting.

By the time dinner ended, the wind had picked up and snowflakes were appearing in ever increasing numbers. True to the Buffalo curse, the flakes were blowing parallel to the terrain and entering our tents through the tiniest of cracks in the flap doors. Art, our Eagle Scout, suggested that we lower the mosquito netting once inside, and the screening would catch any snow that made it through the canvas flaps. This indeed proved to be an effective solution, and my dad and I turned in early to the sound of what now seemed like a blizzard and the songs of a rock station on my six transistor radio. Dad only liked “Harbor Lights,” an old song by The Platters that had been recently redone for my generation. Battery life was short in those days and we were soon left with only the wind and our thoughts. My mind focused on those newsreel clips of the mighty German army snowbound thirty miles from Moscow and helpless. That was just about our distance from Buffalo.

Attempting to sleep in the dead cold of winter with the wind whipping the pines above us was a no go from the start. My sleeping bag had been advertised as containing two pounds of genuine goose down. I’d been light on funds at the time and had passed over the deluxe bag with three pounds of goose down. Like the German army, I’d underestimated what cold really means. My father had opted for several dark green woolen army blankets he’d purchased years ago when he and my mother went tent camping in Canada. They were scratchy but warm. So there we lay, me with my teeth chattering from the cold and Dad itching from the coarse army issue woolen blankets. He told me a story about camping in Northern Ontario in early June and having it snow. Even though the fishing went well, my mother never forgave him for the poor timing. I understood her resentment as my own carefree attitude toward camping was waning.         

Halfway through our no sleep night, the hot chocolate caught up with my bladder. My dad was in equal need of a nonexistent bathroom in the forest. We struggled with our flashlights to find our boots and untie the many straps that secured both the canvas door flaps and the mosquito netting. We also observed that our brand new French air mattresses were no longer plump and firm. What could be the problem? My dad suggested that the cold had reduced the air volume and it was of no concern to us. The trek up into the pines revealed a full blown lake effect blizzard had descended on our little party of novice campers. The yellow snow we made was covered instantly by the fast falling fresh white variety. “I hope Lynn remembers the way out. There’ll be no tracks to follow by morning,” my father said, not sounding all that confident.

It wasn’t the morning sun that woke us, it was the sting of cold ice water on our backsides. Remember those deflating French air mattresses? Well, they continued to deflate as the night went on. This in turn put our body heat in direct contact with the snowpack beneath our tent floor. The rest was simple physics. We had to stand up and try to dry ourselves as best we could. My dad restarted the campfire with much effort put into finding the kindling and pine logs now buried under a foot of fresh powder. A squirt of charcoal lighter fluid brought the fire to life. So much for the Indian method we’d seen in our handbook. They were smart enough to have long houses, animal pelt clothing, and all the time in the world to make it work. We stood with our backs to the flames as a small group of teeth chattering scouts joined us in a circle of distraught ignorance. Humility was earned one mistake at a time.  

Mr. Lynn soon appeared and announced that the smarter option would be to hike out and have breakfast in town at the local diner. I heard no dissenting remarks from the red faced, booger nosed tiny army of boys that had been labeled MEN just twelve hours earlier. Art, the Eagle Scout, got out his map and compass and showed us what he thought was our path out. He was wrong, but our luck held. The snow had abated enough to spot the camp mess hall on the hilltop near the parking lot. With our goal in sight, we broke camp and trudged off in knee deep snow. Each step took a deep breath of effort and the fathers who smoked dearly paid for that extra push. After an hour in the Klondike of Southern Erie County, we all reached the parking lot. Here the vast majority our pack fell down in a snowbank to rest. Thankfully, the Scouts had a full time manager that kept the parking lot and service roads plowed. We brushed the snow off of our caravan of 1950s iron and off we drove to Holland, New York.

Over my pancakes and hot chocolate at the Zider Zee Diner, I could clearly see that the military was not going to be in my future. Mr. Lynn had failed to secure an accurate weather forecast, our equipment was a joke, and Art was incompetent. As a final note, Art went to Vietnam as a second lieutenant. He got so many of his men killed that he returned stateside and entered the priesthood. I became a salesman and stayed at five star hotels. So much for winter camping!