#why is everything in chinese as well ?? *sob*

[berryblu-soda]

MONKIE KID COMING IN WITH A STEEL CHAIR ??????

[ejtheoneandonly]

COMFORTING THEM AT THEIR WORST (or some sh*t I thought of at 3am)

Feat. Some Windbreaker characters that come in my mind (Haruka Sakura, Akihiko Nirei and Hayato Suo)

Haruka Sakura.

Haruka was bruised and normally, you would treat his wounds, he never admits it but L O V E S when you are the one doing it, as he consider your touches to be one of the most warm he has encountered in his whole life, you can even see it in his eyes, he is so mellow. When you try to talk to him about his day (before the brawl, of course) he remains strangely quiet, as if he is reflecting about something, you tilt your head "Haru-kun?", his eyes turned to you "what?" He coldly said...

"Is there something wrong?"

"Nah, nothing at all, why you keep asking?"

"Because it seems like you're going through something, do you want to talk about it?"

"No."

When you're done with your job, you both go sit somewhere outside, Sakura's face seems still at unease. You decide to try talk him out one more time

"Haru-kun-"

"Oh for f*cks sake what?!"

"How did you just talk to me..?"

"I said I'm fine! I don't need anything now!"

"If you say you're fine with that face that means you are not necessarily fine, you don't have to carry everything alone you know?"

"Ugh!" The bi-colored boy stood and groaned "I am not telling you I feel terrible just because you say-...so..." he said it himself. "And?" You were curious to hear the story. "..." Sakura grabbed his head and fell into the ground "Goddammit!!! Why can't I just feel to fit in no matter what I do!!! If I am not strong I am nothing! I really have no other things to offer!! I...I..." His voice was breaking and you didn't think twice before embracing him "You need to be patient, from what I've seen, things have been going very well in Furin for you, and you seem to have fun, I'm pretty sure your peers have already accepted you, or else, who are Nirei and Suo to you?"

Sakura is hesitant, but at the same time...he doesn't want to let you go.

Akihiko Nirei

You and Nirei were in a date, you were walking on the streets, admiring every single thing while you also see the yellow fluffball taking notes of the things you 'wow' at. Today was pretty nice, you bought some food, drinks and took some photos. The thing happened when he was walking you home, it was dusk time and some criminals arrived, threatening to harm you both, Nirei, wanting to be your hero, decided to face them himself but got outnumbered, fortunately, you knew how to fight, so you decided to help him. You both won, they left, you both went to your home, checking if there were any severe injuries. Suddenly, the yellow fluffball wailed.

"Oh no, what happened? Do your injuries hurt?" Your voice sounded so sweet and attentive, you were always like this, main reason he fell in love with you.

"It's just..." *sob* "Just..."

"You can tell me anything."

"I'm tired of being useless, I always wonder, how did I even get to enter Furin if I don't even know how to fight! Even if Suo-san trained me, I will still never be as cool as him or Sakura-san! I am so useless!! I am so useless!!" Nirei was 😭

"No! Don't say that! I love you just how you are! I chose you for you, I could have chosen Sakura or Suo as you say but no, want to know why I chose you?" You said getting closer to him

"🥺?" He looked to your direction

You kissed him in the cheek "Because you always have good intentions, even in the things you are not good at, you always give it all and that's what made me fall in love with you, you are the strongest in my eyes and heart, and always will"

Nirei just kept crying (lol) but it was okay, crybaby and all you still loved him.

Hayato Suo

Hayato Suo is someone who you rarely see sad, this patched person always kept in control of his emotions and thoughts, you were always certain he always had everything under control, but what would happen if those restraints...

...snapped...?

You and the patched guy were drinking tea at a chinese market, both enjoying the view as you enjoyed each other's company, even if you didn't spoke much, the silence was already good enough, but you decided to now check on him, you could feel it, there was stuff he has hiding, you sensed his mind was in a tempest, an unpredictable force that could break out at any moment. Hayato Suo is very good at hiding his emotions to the point it's scary, you will never know what's going on with him, unless he wants to tell you...

At last, you decide to break silence "Suo?"

He turned at you, with a tiny grin "yes?"

"I...have feeling you...you um..." You were sometimes scared that he might take your words the wrong way or worse, that a possible argument arised, but decided to take the risks. The chinese presenting guy blinked "anything you need to say?" He said as he finished his tea.

"You are going through something terrible right now and as much as you want to avoid it I know! I just know it! And I don't care if you say 'I'm fine', I know you're not but let me tell you, whatever you are going through, let me be there for you! As complex as it may be I will do until my last breath to-" You were passionately pronouncing those words you did cause a scene at the market, everyone was now staring at you "...sorry" you sat down again. He chuckled "your passion and dedication towards me is so admirable but..." his aura abruptly changed to a darker one "even if I told you, you would never be able to handle it, this is something very personal of me and I kindly beg you to leave it..."

You were speechless but mainly concerned, of course you never feared he attacked you, you knew he could never but the situation of right now, left you thinking, if he even trusted you enough, maybe not yet...

In the end, you both walked away from that place, you hoped one day, Hayato Suo would trust you and let himself be as vulnerable as ever, so you could be there for him with no doubt...

Forgive if this looks ooc, oh God T-T, also, to the 3 people that read this, you deserve the whole world ⚘️)) if you want another part then say so, I guess.

[hwalilac]

Do You Love Me?

⇴ pairing: park seonghwa x gn!reader

⇴ genre: fluff, angst, F2L

⇴ words: 1.4k

⇴ warnings: crying, jealousy, drinking

⇴ a/n: this is a re-upload! feedback is accepted and welcome, I’d love to hear your thoughts on my work! if you’d like to be on my taglist, lmk. if you’d like to see more of my work, check out my masterlist!

For Seonghwa, you were his ride or die. He did everything for you. He would drop what he’s doing in a heartbeat for you. He would never tell you he loved you, but he did. And you… you were oblivious. To you, you had no idea Seonghwa liked you, let alone loved you. The problem was, you liked him back. But you, never in a million years, thought he liked you back.

It was complicated. Nothing ever moved forward. Both of you were just too scared of the ‘what if’s’. But nothing would ever separate you. You’d been friends since middle school, Seonghwa being the first kid to come up to you on your first day of school. He gets you. He always did. You’d be nothing without him. He’d be nothing without you.

You spent your Saturday afternoon relaxing, eating and sleeping. You weren’t expecting to do anything today anyways. However, as soon as Seonghwa called you about a little get together with the boys at their apartment, you immediately got dressed. He said there would be alcohol as well, fueling you to move faster.

By the time you got there, everyone was already gathered around the living room, sipping on their drink of choice. Seonghwa immediately got up to get you a drink, without even asking you. When he comes back, he hands you your favorite alcohol, proving how well he knows you. You sit down on the floor, opening the bottle and taking a big chug. When you lower the bottle, you see Wooyoung staring at you with a smirk.

“Can I help you with something, Woo?”, you ask teasingly. “I don’t know, can you?”, his voice is filled with a touch of lust, but is mostly covered by his drunken slurring of words. You thought only you picked up on the hint of flirting, so you just let it go. Little did you know that Seonghwa’s hard eyes shot daggers into Wooyoung’s side.

The rest of the night went pretty smoothly, you all stuffing Chinese food in your mouths from the store down the street. By the time it was 10 pm, most of the guys were already in their rooms, headed to bed. You let out the biggest yawn, before getting your stuff ready to leave. While you were in the kitchen, cleaning off your utensils, Wooyoung peeked his head around the corner, directly at you.

“Hi Y/n,” his words were even more slurred than before. Usually he doesn’t drink this much, but you’re not too worried about his behavior. “Hello Wooyoung,” your amused tone spurring him to keep talking. He compliments your outfit, which you give a polite thank you, before telling him to go to bed. “You should head to bed with me,” he jokes, which you know he’s not serious.

Seonghwa happens to walk into the kitchen when Wooyoung says that, his eyes widening when he sees that it’s you he’s talking to. He stands behind the wall, listening for your response. Your response however, is not what he was hoping for. You let out a giggle, the alcohol letting you joke more with Wooyounf than normally do. “Maybe I will,” you say, almost seductively.

For Seonghwa, this moment broke his precious heart. He didn’t stick around for the rest of the conversation, quickly heading to his room and quietly shutting the door. His back hit the door, him slowly sliding down the surface, until he hit the floor.

He knew Wooyoung is like this, but he never thought you would flirt back. And to be honest with himself, he was incredibly hurt. Why did he ever think he had a chance with you? His head sat in his hands, quietly letting out a few sobs before quickly heading to bed in hopes it would get it off his mind.

The next few days are a blur for you, sleeping the day away on Sunday after your killer headache. Monday and Tuesday were classes, with an incredibly tight schedule. Luckily you had Wednesdays off, giving you time every week to spend a day with Seonghwa. Because this is routine for you guys, you’re surprised when you don’t find a good morning text, along with a time he’ll be at your place.

You almost panic, before coming to the conclusion that he must’ve slept through his alarm. You go about your morning normally, giving him time to wake up. By the time 9 am rolls around and there is still no text from him, you start to get a little worried. You send a “good morning, you ok?”, text, hoping he just simply forgot. But by the time it hits 11 am and nothing, you decide to just leave him alone, thinking he might just want to be alone today.

You try not to worry about him as the week goes by without any word for him, but when it hits Friday and there’s still nothing, you decide to text Hongjoong. It turns out Hwa has been hiding in his room all week, not coming out unless he’s hungry. You decide enough is enough, and head over to their place Friday night.

When you knock on the door, Jongho answers, letting you in, knowing you’re there for Seonghwa. You quietly head over to his door, trying not to disturb anyone, before knocking on his door. It takes a minute before he opens his door, but when he does, you find that his eyes are swollen and tired. But once they lie on you, they widen almost comically. You’d laugh if you weren’t so worried.

Before you can ask him anything, he speaks first, “What do you want?”. His tone almost hurts to hear, not expecting such irritation. Your mouth drops open, hoping he’s not talking to you like that. And yet, he is, judging by the frown on his lips. You scoff, before pushing him aside to march into his room. “What is wrong with you, Hwa? What’s happening?”, you question, almost desperately. You wrack your brain trying to understand why he’s so upset with you.

He stays quiet for a second, before huffing and moving to his bed. He sits down, his head facing the ground. “It’s dumb.” He cannot be serious. You sit next to him, grab his hands in yours and tell him to tell you anyways. He lets out another long sigh, before confessing. “I didn’t like when Wooyoung flirted with you, and you didn’t stop him.” You sit there for a second, not even understanding what he’s talking about.

Then it hits you, “You mean last Saturday? When I was drunk out of my mind?”. You shake your head and squeeze his hands. He frowns, before continuing, “I’m sorry Y/n, I’m so sorry for not telling you.” He quickly takes his hands out of yours, before facing you. “I love you. I love you more than anything.” Your jaw can’t help but drop, in pure shock. There’s no way.

“Seonghwa, don’t play with me.” You spit out at him, in pure denial of his words. But he reassures you, “I do. And I was so jealous, when it’s not my place to. You’re not mine.” Your eyes swell up with tears, part of you still not sure he’s telling the truth. But it’s Seonghwa, of course he is. “Hwa… I love you too.” He sits there, face blank. You can see when it finally hits him, that you like him back. You like each other.

He lets out the biggest sigh of relief, thankful that this constant state of secretly pining over each other can be over. You like him. No no, you love him. That’s all he could ever ask for. Once the silence finally sets in, he can’t help but apologize over and over again. There’s no way he really ignored you, when he could’ve just admitted his feelings to you. But it all worked out in the end.

The rest of the night consisted of gentle kisses, cuddling and telling each other all the untold feelings that were bottled up. You can help but lie in his arms, hoping to never leave his side again. This is the start of something new, something beautiful. The funny thing is, when you finally told the boys about your new relationship, Wooyoung shouted “Finally!”. There was nothing to worry about. He had you, and you had him.

I do not give permission for anyone to repost my work

[little-winter-witch]

Déja vu

Contains spoilers of Moonvale's 1st episode as well as angst, sadness, crying and nostalgia.

It has been weeks. Or even months? I don't know. I lost track of time, since the incident in the Ironsplinter Mines. Not a word from my friends from Duskwood since. Or ... From Jake.

I've tried to just go on with my life, go to work, meet with friends and family, try new hobbies. But I'm not the same person I was before Thomas texted me. And I'll never be. I don't feel complete anymore. I don't belong here anymore. Whenever my phone vibrates, whenever a random guy looks at me for more than five seconds, I think of him. I wish, it was him. I see clues in every corner, hear my name, although no one said it.

And then, I got this message. Didn't know the number, but it felt so familiar. It reminded me of how I was introduced to the Duskwood gang. But it wasn't someone from Duskwood. He introduced himself as Eric and said that he got my contact from his friend Adam, who called me shortly after and disappeared. Similar, yet very strange. I agreed to help and Eric introduced me to his friends. It felt strange, being in a new messenger group, with new people. They were as desperate as my friends from Duskwood and very nice to me, but I kept my distance. Memories flashed before my eyes, memories I had kept secure somewhere in a corner of my brain. Memories that hurt. But I stayed. I just couldn't leave them, while they were desperately searching for their friend. It felt like, I finally had a purpose again.

While wandering through the woods, looking for Adam, or at least a hint of his whereabouts, Eric flirted with me. I played along a bit. But all I could think of was him. And the stupid pamphlet of the Chinese restaurant around the corner, that hung on the door of my fridge. I kept it after having takeout. Because it reminded me of one of the first moments Jake dared to flirt with me.

And then... Ash contacted me.

She was a friend of Eric's and part of their gang. She asked me directly if I was involved in the Duskwood incident. I felt my stomach sink. I told her, briefly, what happened and why I didn't say anything. She reacted nicely, but I didn't dare to trust her too much. After we finished that conversation, I sat motionless on my bed. It had been the first time, that I had told someone about my experiences in Duskwood. A tear ran down my cheek.

That was when I got contacted by an unknown number. I wasn't sure what to make of their messages at first, but soon I realised, that Eric could be in danger. He'd been gone into an area they called the 'forbidden forest', which was surrounded by a fence with barbed wire. He managed to get away from whoever was with him, and found a cave. A cave that reminded me of the Ironsplinter Mines. And that was too much. The hope I had when that unknown number had appeared, the pressure, when, again, someone was in danger while being on the phone with me, and then the cave. That stupid cave!

I missed him. I missed him so much that it physically hurt. I opened the last conversation I had with Jake.

"I love you"

"I love you, too"

And then I sat there, sobbing and crying my heart out, clenching the phone against my chest. It vibrated.

"MC. I WILL FIND YOU"

'Cause you're everywhere to me

And when I close my eyes it's you I see.

You're everything I know, that makes me believe

I'm not alone.

Thanks for reading my first Duskwood fanfiction on tumblr. I hope you like it 🙂

[1staind-3]

Argument hcs for blue lock 🤯🤯🤯 (half angst, half crack?)

This list includes Nagi, Reo, Aiku, Kunigami, Chigiri, and Kaiser

‼️Tw: mentions of gaslighting, cheating, dv (kaisers backstory), chigiris leg, uhmm someone says “kys” but idk what the warning is called‼️

Very badly formatted pls be warned sob

Probably like 1k words lmao

︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶

Nagi

•y’all started arguing because he keeps dropping all his dirty clothes off by the washing machine and expecting you to wash them (green aura with dead flies)

•when he’s in an argument he responds like 5 times until he makes his point, then he just stops responding.

•he’ll just stand up, walk away and watch tv or start playing fortnite or smth

•if you follow him, still trying to talk to him, he’ll put headphones on

“Just drop it y/n, you’re letting your emotions get the better of you.”

•if you wanted to turn the argument physical, then snatch his headphones out

•he’d just stand up and look at you with a face blank with anger, waiting for you to make the next move.

“You really wanna do this, y/n?”

*locks in* nuh uh

︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶

Reo

•yall started arguing because Reo is acting passive agressive around you, and you dont know why.

•he’ll just be saying shit like

“having fun?”

“Gee, if only you had a boyfriend to talk to… right infront of you.”

“Is he my replacement?”

•when you ask what’s wrong, he’ll say,

“Oh, nothing.” Once again, completely pissed off.

•after a week, the alpha wolf inside you SNAPPED, and you started asking him why he’s doing all this? Like what’s his problem!

“My problem? You’re always watching these stupid romcoms like you dont have a boyfriend right infront of you!! Just admit it, you’re getting bored of me. I knew it…”

•Erm… what the striker is bro going on abt??

•you replied, on the verge of laughter, that you’ve only been watching all these romcoms for an English assignment. Who would willingly watch binge watch hallmark movies while writing down notes in a notepad?

•Reo stared at you in shock, then blushed. “Really..?”

•You smiled and ushered him to sit next to you, cuddling him the second he sat down. “I know i just dissed Hallmark movies, but they’re popular for a reason… i always cry in the end. Hey, you see that guy?”

•Reo smiled back and cuddled into you, apologizing for how he acted. You apologized as well, and reminded him that there’s no need to overthink these so much, you’re not gonna get mad at him for having feelings.

(Erm… what the roleplay !! Sorry guys idk like what pov the rest of these are in 😭😭 forgibe me)

︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶

Aiku

(Deep breath in…. Deep breath out…. Deeep breath in…. NOOOOOOOO)

•yall started arguing because you found a pair of underwear in his duffle bag… lingerie underwear…

•Aiku is literally the gaslighter of all time🔥🔥 so he’ll managed to convince you that this was all just some silly mistake.

•after that, arguing either him became really hard. He seemed to have a question or excuse for literally every problem you accuse him of

•seen him with a girl?

“Cmon y/n, ive never been to a bowling alley in my life. Who even goes there? I think you’re just being paranoid babe.”

“Want a massage?”

•seen him again with a different girl? And this time he looked you right in the eyes?

“No way babe, that’s impossible. I hate chinese food.” Then he’ll carry you to your room, feel your head and say

“You’re burning up… fevers can cause hallucinations in some people, I’m surprised you made it here without wrecking. Hey, don’t worry now, everything’s gonna be darling.”

•eventually you just stopped arguing with him about it. Or anything.

︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶

Kunigami

•yall started arguing because you feel like Kunigami’s being secretive with you, and hiding some messed up issues

•Kunigami tries his best to avoid arguments with you, but when they happen you stress him out the most in the world because he seriously has to watch what he says and does

“Im not being fu- freaking… secretive, y/n, you don’t have to know my entire life story to be with me.”

“I know… i just…what? No! I dont need fucking therapy? Dont piss me off, y/n.”

•the last thing he wants to do is hurt you, so he most of the time tries to keep his responses curt and to the point and walks out before he starts yelling.

“Im gonna take a walk, y/n. Dont follow me.”

•if you grab his arm, he’ll look back at you and repeat what he said.

“Dont. follow. me.”

• he cant let you know about wild card. He cant let you know about the person he used to be. He can’t ever, ever, let you meet shidou. He cant ever, ever, ever, let you see him cry.

•all arguments with him lead absolutely nowhere, so you’d better change your approach with him to get what your looking for out of him.

• do not, i repeat, do not ever slap/hit him. He wont hit you back, but now you’ve instantly made him lose any will to preserve your feelings and have a normal conversation

•he will think of the most foul, personal, targeted insults known to man. Lots of “kill yourself”s on his part. You two will without a doubt break up after this.

•he wont act like he didn’t feel betrayed, and he’ll touch the spot you hurt him at while he falls asleep, and tries not to cry.

︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶

Chigiri

•yall started arguing because he keeps using up all ur shampoo whenever he showers at your place

• first thing he’ll do is deny it, then pin the blame on you (darvo type sh)

•he doesn’t mean to be toxic, he just really, really, hates being wrong.

•you guys argue alot. Over basically everything.

•half the times, chigiri can admit that he was wrong, but he’ll NEVER apologize

•he doesnt really think he did anything wrong??

•when you notice that Chigiri had never ONCE apologized to you for literally anything.

“Oh really? Well that’s literally impossible but sure.”

•you told him to say sorry right now then

“Fine. Sorry.”

•then you told him to say sorry to you

“For what though?”

•eventually chigiri revealed that he doesnt apologize to people unless its something really fucked up. He doesn’t wanna just say it so lightly, because then the word becomes meaningless. A worn out formality that everyone uses when someone bumps into them at the store. It basically used to be a greeting for him back when he fucked his ankle up. they’d see his wheelchair before they saw him. Theyd say sorry before they even said his name.

•your mouth did an O and you understood instantly.

•after that, you guys argued just a little bit less

︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶

Kaiser

•you don’t argue with kaiser

•kaiser is ALWAYS right.

•maybe if you ask him kindly for a solution to your problem, he would grace you with an answer to your plight

•but arguing back to him is unacceptable, unless you want to be grabbed by

“You dont deserve to cry.”

•is something you hear from him often.

•he’ll always somehow find a way to mention how his dad used to beat him for crying, if you start crying infront of him which you find very ominous

“How long will it take to put this in your stupid head already. Im right, you’re wrong. You’re more suited for looking pretty instead of thinking”

• after you eventually stopped talking, Kaiser decided it was time to start looking for someone who could actually entertain him

︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶

Ty for reading !! And ik i did shitty w kaiser but i dont fucking like him so i never rlly paid attention to his personality LMAO but if yall want to give any crituque id be thankful!! Bye yall ❤️❤️

[wanderlust-in-my-soul]

Do you know any thai/korean/all BL dramas with sad ending?

Thai/Korean/All BL Dramas With Sad Endings

Okay, let me get started. BL in general is not really created for sad endings. It is a phantasy land where all kinds of dreams come true. And originally it adressed a specific audience. So, some of the dramas I am listing here are more queer media in general and not specifically BL. And some of those dramas have an open ending, that does not mean it is not a sad ending, and some might have a beautiful ending, which was kind of sad. There are so many ways of reading those endings.

Two of the shows I haven’t watched yet, but I know that those have sad endings… And please be aware, there will be spoilers after the read-more-dash.

Let’s get started!

Egoist – based on a true story, this Japanese movie is heartbreaking. It is a beautiful story about the love between two people and how they manage their life together until, yeah well, until fate f*ed everything up.

Eien No Kinou (Eternal Yesterday) – another Japanese title. From the start of this series, you just know that this won’t end well. It just can’t. And at the same time, it is so beautiful, you can’t stop watching it. So good!

History 3: Make Our Days Count – I guess people would come after me, if I don’t mention this Taiwanese bl. Yeah…I wasn’t that impacted by the ending, but most of the people who watched it were devastated. I understand why, so have fun 😊

Kissable lips – the first Korean one. This series wasn’t my cup of tea, but that wasn’t the question. For a sad ending, this is your series!

The Miracle of Teddy Bear – this is such a complex thai series as is the ending. Many didn’t watch it because of some weird elements of the series and the episodes are long, but BUT it is so worth a watch! The ending? I kind of liked it? But it was very bittersweet and considering the use of the Little Prince source it is really good...but sad... I am confused... still...

Dark Blue And Moonlight – a Taiwanese series…I wouldn’t recommend it. I can’t really remember the ending… I know it was bad sad.

180 Degree Longitude Passes Through Us – a thai masterpiece. I love this one so much and I analysed the sh*t out of it! It is so good and I was devastated in the end! Such a great storytelling and cinematography and story and the characters...perfection.

Dear Doctor, I’m Coming For Soul – this is a thai series, which got very little attention when it aired (I don’t know why, I really liked it) and the ending was just a sobbing fest for me. I mean I liked it and it was just logical, but I was very sad!

Don’t Say No – also a thai series and I don’t focus on the main couple… I couldn’t care less about them… but the side couple! Oh the heartbreak I felt and the betrayel!

He She It – To this day I still ask myself what I have watched here. All I know is, it is confusing and kind of sad…the whole story, not just the ending.

The Best Story – it is Thai and it is YinWar… so it is good. Nevertheless, it has a very bittersweet ending, and I didn’t feel good after finishing this miniseries. I was very sad!

Once Again – one of my favorite series of 2022. This Korean series deals with a lot of trauma. It has some supernatural element and is really really good! And I was sobbing for the whole f*cking last episode!

When The Waves Rise – in this Korean short film, it is all about the feeling you get from it. It left me devastated. I was really not doing well after finishing it. It touched a part of my soul and it left a sore spot there.

Your Name Engraved Herein – I haven’t seen this one, because I know it will break my heart and I am still not ready for that. It is a Taiwanese movie and I know that I will love it, but I also know that I will cry my little eyes out.

Grey Rainbow – haven‘t seen this one either. This is a Thai miniseries and it is said to have a very sad ending.

The Untamed – the king, the queen, the emperor of sadness. I love this 50 episodes long Chinese masterpiece of a series to death! It doesn’t have a bad ending imo and it is quite open, but the amount of tears I shed during watching this fantasy epos was not funny anymore. I was ugly crying for like 15 minutes straight at one point. And I felt empty after I finished it. I miss it so much! I wish I could watch it again with all the emotions I had during my first watch!

But yeah…this is my little list 😊

If anyone wants to add more dramas, please feel free to do so 💜

Anon, I hope I could help a little bit and this list is useful 🌼

[hurtcomfortficstilltheend]

Study sesh gone wrong.

Wanda Maximoff x gn! Reader (College Au)

Summary: It's finals week and you are overwhalmed, Wanda helps you get through a rough study session.

Warnings: Academic stress, being very overwhalmed, flow state is a bitch sometimes, feeling cold, hurt/comfort, fluff at the end.

A/N: Wrote this last year before a massive biology exam.

Word count: 862

You get to your room ten minutes after finishing your last lesson for the day. The space is cramped and the air stuffy, so you open the windows and make your bed to feel somewhat accomplished. 

You go to the bathroom and fill up a big jar with water. You are about to dive into a long study session, you can’t afford anything else, and you’ll need to at least be hydrated to keep focus.

If you stop to think about it, you know, deep down, that you are overdoing it. Ever since your academic performance started to be graded (back in high school) you feel like you need to get everything right. Every single exam you have ever taken and every essay you have ever written has either gotten an A or an A+, which for many would mean that you can relax now, right? You have a soft cushion to land if you are to get a bad grade, right?

Wrong! Cause what if you get sick, and then you can’t go to class, and then you fail your exams and have to redo the whole year? What if you get into a depressive episode and your professors think you are just being lazy? What if you get the bare minimum grades to graduate and then no one wants to hire you to be a scientist and then you die of hunger?

You can’t let that happen, and you won’t. If it takes not having any social life while on exam times and finals week, so be it.

You sit down on your small desk and get all of your notes and books out.

Hours pass by without you noticing. Tomorrow you have a biology test and you haven’t had time to study during the week, cause today there was a math exam that you -also- felt totally unprepared for.

You are so immersed in your work that you don’t notice when the door opens and your girlfriend and roommate, Wanda, comes in after knocking a few times.

“Hi babe! I brought takeout!” She notices you can’t hear her. She closes the door behind her and takes a few steps into the room. “Jeez, it’s freezing in here”.

You come out of your concentration induced trance and stare at Wanda while she closes the windows. You notice that it’s already dark outside.

“Hi Wans” you get up from your chair and almost fall, as your legs feel numb from sitting for so long. She catches you though, and engulfs you in her warm embrace.

“Honey, you’re ice-cold” she says in a worried tone. Only then you notice you’re shivering uncontrollably. You bury your face on the crook of her neck. Now that you're out of the flow state, you feel tired, hungry, and cold, very cold, all at once.

“I didn’t notice, sorry” you apologize unnecessarily “I was studying”. You take a step back to see her face. By the look of it you know she’s worried about you. You feel the tears well up in your eyes. You don’t understand why. “I’m really cold”.

“Baby…” And that’s all it takes for the dam to break. You feel the sobs in the back of your throat before you let them out into the air.

Wanda pulls you in again and strokes your back in calming circles. There are no words needed. After a while the crying turns into soft and sporadic hiccups. 

“We have to get you into warmer clothes, okay?” you nod in agreement, without enough energy to speak yet. She hands you a pile of fresh clothes: a pair of sweatpants, a long sleeve t-shirt and your -her- favorite hoodie.

She warms up water in an electric kettle while you change, and you choose your favorite tea from the makeshift cupboard.

You end up eating lukewarm chinese with rose tea while cuddling in bed, because your feet were cold as ice and you got worried that they would fall off if you didn’t get under the covers at that exact moment. 

The lights have been off for a while, when you whisper “I’m sorry” you think she’s already asleep until she asks “What for?” softly.

“I don’t know. I feel like I’ve ruined the evening for you” you admit. your face is resting in her chest, and you can feel how her breath catches. 

“You couldn’t ruin anything babe” she assures you. Her fingers run through your scalp in soothing patterns. She feels so lucky to be the one who gets to comfort you when you show this part of yourself, being that you are usually the most cheerful and optimistic person in the room. She feels special knowing you can unmask your insecurities and be vulnerable around her. “I love you, you know that, right?”

“I love you too” the tiniest of smiles makes its way to your face, you’re so lucky to have her by your side. You forget for a while about the biology exam, and all your studies for that matter. You drift off listening to your love’s heartbeat, with her arm around your shoulders, and her lovely voice in your head.

[wangmiao]

hii! i just finished reading the dark forest!! what a journey, i think it took me about a month to finish it lol. i wanted to share some thoughts !!

i found some of the concepts fascinating.. what stuck with me the most now i that i (try to) recall everything that happened, was the battle of darkness and the dark forest theory as a whole was brilliant. i imagine those people that were just- endlessly floating in the immensely vast universe and it made me think "oh wow how Sad and Hopeless that must've been" i too would've want to end it all, i believe that's a lot to endure.. that's one

another thing was the infamous wallfacer project. well that was new. and the fact that they had to plan everything on their own bc of the sophons, that's also kind of depressing lol. one thing i was confused was: why was luoji re-elected as a wallfacer at the end? i mean there wasn't anything more he could have done anyways?

da shi as always is such a great person😭 he never abandoned luoji during this long crazy journey, even after 200+ years. honestly i love his character a ton, i wanted to see what would happen to him at the end but there was nothing! will he be on Death's end? or his character just ends here? :((

i thought the whole thing with the "trees" as homes was pretty cool, though i couldn't really see it in my imagination haha i honestly can't imagine what would our society be like in, say, 300 years from now

i found it too simplistic(? that only when the trisolarans communicated with luoji did they stopped their plan to coming to earth, or maybe there's something i missed? or maybe it is really just that: communication solves everything? lol idk

and a deserved special mention to zhang beihai, respect!

i think that's everything i've got on my mind right now, but in general it was very interesting and depressing and dark.... what were some your favourite moments from the book? i can't wait to start death's end next !! but i'll start later, i have to fully process this book first hahaha anyways that's all, have a great day or night!!! :))

hello, friend! it's great reading this ask, and i'm glad you decided to share it with me. i have to say that i read the books years ago, so my memory on everything is not that fresh. and since i read the chinese version, i don't know some of the vocabularies they used in englishn. while i'll try my best to reply to this ask, i'm sure there's gotta be some novel fans here that could do better than me.

the dark forest is indeed very interesting and depressingly dark. i was definitely in awe when i heard the dark forest theory for the first time (before i read the books, and that was partly why i decided to read them). i also really like 水滴/waterdrop or droplet which is just something that looks simple but super super super powerful.

i enjoyed reading about the wallfacer project. even the three failed ones are equally fascinating and disturbing. i want to bow down to liu cixin's imagination...if i remember it correctly, luo ji is re-elected because his "咒语/spell or curse" actually came true. and at that time humans are really hopeless, so they just want to have someone that they believe can save/lead them.

da shi is everything. i lol need a da shi myself. unfortunately, he's not in the third book. my inner shiwang shipper feels that shi qiang and wang miao got similar style of exist from the story. and the common believe (i don't even remember if i read it in the novel or it was fan theory) is that shi qiang dies of natural causes at old age like wang miao. i kinda feel like maybe shi qiang and wang miao promised each other that they'd try to stay alive so that they can both be copernicus *sobs*...

ok...bear with my silly shallow shipper's talk for a moment, you know some people were like shiwang will be no more once season 2 of three body comes out, and everyone will start to ship shi qiang and luo ji, and it kinda bothered me a bit (ps. i know most people including myself didn't ship anything while reading the books, but man, these dramas are really forcing it on us lol). but i don't anymore, because i really think wang miao is special to shi qiang. besides shi qiang being a good and protective human being who will die for the greater good, i think one of the reasons that he stays with luo ji all this time is because luo ji reminds him of wang miao. even though it is only mentioned very breifly, i do believe liu cixin meant to tell us how important wang miao is to shi qiang... “我这辈子还只见着他一个”

as for luo ji stopping the trisolarans, i think he uses the dark forest theory, and his threat of exposing the location of the trisolaris (and in turn exposing earth's location) stops their plan.

and zhang beihai is an awesome, complex, and well loved tragic hero even though he isn't a very major character like luo ji. i remember yu hewei said in an interview that if he didn't play shi qiang, he'd probably like to play zhang beihai. i'm really curious who they'd pick to play zhang beihai in season 2.

anyways, thanks so much for the ask. you made me want to re-read the books, and i know i really should! have a nice day/night!

[sketching-shark]

Do you think its funny that the fandom treats the Monk kinda the same way he treated Wukong, he kinda deserve it but can we at least something different about him (like I don't see anyone make bug jokes or about all the poetry)

AUGH well anon as I've said before I'm well aware that the internet is were nuance goes to die & while yes I know fandom is a place were people often just want to have fun & not think to hard, I do find it funny but also increasingly frustrating how even though fandom often purports itself as a place of massive diversity more and more it seems to be structured around creating an Official Version of characters' personalities & relationships rather than trying out many different things, or even considering the implications of the source material.

Now of course it has to be acknowledged that a lot of this is often due to what's in the canon work itself (like Wu Cheng'en himself seems to have deliberately written Tang Sanzang in large part as a caricature of fussy Confucian scholars), but in addition I feel like the popular understanding of a character as one extreme or another goes double for stories where the only easy access that an audience may have to it is from translated works or from cartoony retellings. Speaking for myself for example it's been pretty wild having gotten into Journey to the West before Monkie Kid came out & now it often seems like the lego show version of the story (well that and the sarcastic youtube retelling) is the only version of Xiyouji that people in the western internet audience primarily know/care about. But I'm coming from a position where I had the time & access to both read through the entirety of the Anthony C. Yu English translation (which as per usual I need to remind people you can access for free in PDF format on multiple posts on this hellsite) as well as was able to access some of the scant few scholarly works in English about the story. And that's just not something that a lot of people know about or have access to.

As such, it's pretty understandable why many people wouldn't know about all the poetry because well that's never even been brought up in the versions of Journey to the West that they've encountered, or wouldn't make bug jokes because there's little mention of Tang Sanzang having been Golden Cicada in any retelling that they've seen, or if it is it's just presented like fun trivia rather than one of the primary reasons why Tang Sanzang was even chosen to be on the journey in the first place (or what the religious significance of the cicada was in China). Add everything that can easily get lost in translation to the further simplification that cartoony retellings demand, and you can see why many people's understanding of the Tang monk would just be "whiny idiot who's constantly getting himself kidnapped, falling off his dragon horse, & torturing the monkey," especially since between Sun Wukong and Tang Sanzang the monk is by far the more static character (although a lot of Chinese retellings add scenes of him actually recognizing he was wrong & apologizing to the monkey in a reversal of the simplification trend afeawsdf).

Plus, well, I mean it's not like a cartoon is going to include all those scenes of Tang Sanzang tied up & sobbing his eyes out because he's literally in a gore-bespattered cave surrounded by yaoguai who plan to eat him, and they're especially not going to include the times when he's sexually assaulted. In a different approach than usual these things and the resulting trauma could be presented as explanations (but not excuses) for Tang Sanzang's ongoing hostility towards Sun Wukong (who lest we forget is the first yaoguai to try to kill him), but doing that well takes a level of nuance and care that's vanishingly rare in both big budget & fanon retellings of Xiyouji. Hell, in retrospect it's not even handled that well in Xiyouji itself, as if memory serves correctly the kidnappings & near death/consumption are mainly just framed as things that the monk needs to endure to get to the next stage in the journey, and Sun Wukong even makes fun of Tang Sanzang after he was molested by a female yaoguai for an entire night.

So YEAH I often do wish that Tang Sanzang was treated with more nuance (like I would LOVE to see a retelling of Xiyouji where he's more of an intelligent rule-breaker like the historical Xuanzang), but between how he was written in canon & the tendencies towards tropes & simplification in both big-budget retellings and fanon tendencies you can see how he would end up Journey to the West's Most Hate-able Character.

[youkaigakkou-tl]

The Kyoto Arc Analysis Post (Part 1)

In other words, “OP has been consumed by wikipedia rabbit holes for the past 3 months”

Starting writing this in September, now it's November. Also this thing is nearly 7000 words.

TLDR: This is basically a crash course on ancient Kyoto, the mythology then, and stuff that details in this arc points to. Chinese philosophies and mythology are mentioned too, when relevant.

Spoilers for chapters 82 to 94.

I keep hitting image limit so this has been split into multiple posts

This part covers the urban planning of ancient Kyoto, what the four gods are, and some locations shown in ch 83.

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4

(If you want to read the whole thing in a google doc, here's the link)

Warning: I’m not a historian, just some rando on tumblr, I’ll probably get some details wrong. If you have anything to add or anything to correct, please do, also don’t get too mad at me.

Also, if this shows up in the searches for some of the other mangas I namedrop, I’m sorry!

If there’s a concept you’re interested to know more about, just google it. I’m bound to leave out stuff bc not everything is relevant (and there’s already plenty of irrelevant stuff in here sobs), people write whole books about this stuff, I’ll be here for 1000 years if I were to bring up all of it.

I Don’t Know How To Start This

I guess I’ll recommend some other manga that have to do with gods, Shinto, that stuff.

Well. Everyone knows what Noragami is. If you don’t, go read/watch it. If you do, go read/watch it again. It’s probably better than you remember it being. That’s the curse of monthly manga, it feels like there’s pacing problems when you read it once a month, but usually when you binge it you find it’s structured pretty well. Strangely I don’t find this with youkaigakkou, but maybe because I think about it 24/7.

Touge Oni, or “Primal Gods in Ancient Times”. This manga leans heavily into ancient Japan, Shinto creation myths, stuff like that. Tonally it’s kind of like Mushishi, in the way that powers beyond human comprehension just do crazy shit. Anyway, great manga, highly recommend.

Wow, The Actual Manga, Right

Just some trivia to start with. This is going to wander quite a bit, because there’s a lot about history and mythology, which means everything is connected to everything else. You know how it is.

Shinto shrines are called shrines, 神社 -jinja, meaning “place of the god(s)”

Buddhist temples are called temples, 寺 -dera or -ji.

The temple they’re staying at is called “Bonnou-ji”, or "worldly desires temple". As far as I can tell, this isn’t a real place, nor could I figure out what temple it’s based on just from the scenery we get to see. (We don’t even get a general location of what part of Kyoto it’s in.)

Heian-Kyo

You may have noticed South is oriented at the top on this page.

I have a guess, but I can’t be sure it’s right.

Why does it matter? First of all, we have to talk about the other thing Seimei mentions about Kyoto: It’s built in a grid.

(By the way, this is an insane thing to say. What does he mean?? Does he mean “ah yes city was built like this over 100 years ago so one day someone could use this specific spell involving a grid to subdue a giant booba monster”?)

Also, the word he uses for “grid” here is “碁盤目 (gobanme)”, which in the literal sense means “shaped like a Go board”, which is cute. I want to see them play Go.

Heian-kyo (the name for Kyoto back then), like Japan’s previous capital of Heijo-kyo (now Nara), was modelled after the Chinese capital of Chang’an (now Xi’an).

For the record, they probably didn’t call themselves “Heian-kyo” back in those times, and started calling themselves Kyoto around the 11th century. It’s kinda like how we call it “ancient Japan” but they didn’t call themselves that. To them it was just “now” and “the capital”. Why make a name for “the capital” when there’s just one capital that will be capital forever? Makes sense.

(Just for reference, the layout of the streets and where Heian-kyo would be compared to modern Kyoto.)

The emperor’s palace is in the northernmost part of the rectangular city, with the main street Suzaku-oji going down the center of the city to the southern gate.

The reason behind that is the idea that left (east) is more important than right (west), and that the emperor should sit with his back facing the north star (Polaris), so that the sun rises from the left (east) and sets on the right (west).

What Heian-kyo and Chang’an are both based off is the urban planning fengshui idea of “shijin-so-o”, which translates to “four gods topography”, which is the very same four gods we’re talking about this arc.

There are two very similar versions of this philosophy, the original one and the one derived from that.

The original version is based off the idea of “zofu-jusui” meaning storing wind and water. There is to be mountains in the North, hills in the East and West, and a body of water in the South, creating a sort of jug.

The expanded version is:

Seiryuu to the left, flowing water in the East Byakko to the right, thoroughfare in the West Suzaku to the front, lake in the South Genbu to the back, mountains in the North

Basically, a city is to be bounded by mountains in the North, a river in the East, a road in the West, a lake to the South. Also, again, left and right in this definition is based off the emperor’s perspective, which could explain the direction labelling on that page.

In any case, both of these definitions apply to Kyoto.

Also, Chinese maps traditionally were oriented with south at the top, I can't say for certain if Japanese maps did too, but it's likely!

However, if you look at maps today, you may find that there’s no major body of water south of Kyoto.

In the past, there used to be the Ogura-ike pond south of Kyoto, which symbolised Suzaku. (Despite being called a “pond”, it was more the size of a lake, 4km by 3km). In the 1930s, it was filled in because of land reclamation, to create more farmland.

In a sense, Kyoto had “lost Suzaku”.

Intermission

It’s also BECAUSE of this very philosophy that Kyoto nowadays gets abnormally hot in summer (above 35 degrees celsius for 15 days a year on average, compared to 5 days everywhere else).

Because it’s inland and blocked by mountains on all sides, on hot days, cool air can’t flow in from elsewhere so it just keeps getting hotter. Sounds like a stupid trade-off for stupid philosophy, but the practical reason behind the philosophy was probably that surrounded by mountains, Kyoto would be harder to invade.

Suzaku-oji

The main street, Suzaku-oji, also gets its name from the four gods. The main entrance to the palace, connected to Suzaku-oji is also called Suzakumon, or Suzaku Gate.

Speaking of Suzakumon, it shows up in the manga!

It’s where Byakko brings the gang when they go to the Seimei shrine. (Albeit a surreal version) The text on the plaque over the door is hard to read on this manga page, but it’s clear in this chapter promo art.

I believe it’s also where Shutendouji appears in ch 89. The text over the door is even harder to make out, but the building itself looks just like in that promo art.

Back to Suzaku-oji. Looking at modern Kyoto, you may notice that there's no major road down the center, instead there’s that major road to the right (in yellow). Zoom in! Enhance! What’s that road called!

Karasuma-dori street. Corresponding to Karasuma-koji of Heian-kyo, and has replaced Suzaku-oji in modern times as a main street of Kyoto. You know, like Karasuma Ranmaru. (launches myself out the nearest window)

So anyway, what gets me hung up about why south is at the top in that page, is that it just does not correspond to the map under it.

Left side is a miniature model of Heian-kyo, it’s basically a perfect match. And you can see Suzaku-oji right there on the miniature model, that big wide road, stretching from the palace gate towards the south, which would mean that south should be at the bottom of the page instead of north.

So why is it like that? idk

ALSO, IF YOU LOOK AT THIS PANEL FROM CH88, WHERE IS THE MAIN STREET???? This panel drives me insane. YOU KNOW WHAT THIS LOOKS LIKE? If you took that top half, the palace, and just pasted it at the bottom. And also the sides. DID THEY THINK NOBODY WOULD NOTICE? You know what they had a point. Canada “most sane yohaji enjoyer”, OP of this blog, who spent 2 months looking for sources on ancient Japanese and Chinese urban planning in 3 different languages, is an outlier and should not be counted.

What does this have to do with Kuji-kiri?

Honestly? I don’t know! There’s not a super obvious connection.

Kuji-kiri is the grid thing Douman does, “kuji” means nine words, “kiri” means cut. It’s a version of the kuji-in (nine hand seals), where the kuji-in is nine hand signs paired with nine words or phrases, the kuji-kiri is 5 horizontal and 4 vertical lines, drawn alternating, starting with a horizontal line.

It’s said to be derived from the principle of yin-yang in Taoism, which Onmyoudou as a whole comes from. (Onmyou and yin-yang use the same kanji)

Specifically, the 5 horizontal slashes are yang and offensive, the 4 vertical slashes are yin and defensive.

Worth mentioning, Onmyoudou also incorporates the philosophy of gogyo (five elements). Will elaborate on that later.

9 is a symbolic number in Taoism, said to be the perfect number in divination for yang, or the nine planets, or the seven stars of the big dipper plus two guardian stars, believed to be the gateway to heaven. There is the most tenuous of connections here, in that 9 was an important number in Chinese philosophy, where an ancient Chinese urban planning guide states “9 li x 9 li squares” (“li” is a unit of measurement) and “9 vertical and 9 horizontal streets in the city”

To that end, I assume the connection is simply that Kyoto is grid = Kuji-kiri is grid.

Four Gods

Four gods, auspicious beasts, symbols, guardians, whatever. The idea originated from China, and didn’t change all that much when they got to Japan. They don’t have this many names in Chinese, it’s just called “si xiang”. “Si” means four. “Xiang” doesn't have a great exact translation.

Not to be confused with any other mythical figures that come in fours that China/Buddhism/whatever seem to love so much, for all that “four” is an unlucky number.

Like a lot of other Chinese mythical things, while associated with Taoism, the four gods didn’t really originate from any religion. In that sense, I think they occupy the same cultural space as Japanese youkai, in that while sorta connected to religion, they’re not the focus.

They’re not gods of any religion, so what are they?

They’re constellations.

In Chinese astronomy, much like the western zodiac, the night sky is split into parts corresponding with the Earth’s position throughout the year. (Albeit, based off the moon rather than the sun.)

The night sky is split into 4 quadrants and 1 middle section, the middle around polaris symbolizing the emperor, and each quadrant is one of the four gods.

As said before, this is relevant because it’s part of the fengshui stuff behind the layout of Chang’an, which was inherited into the layout of Heian-kyo.

What does this have to do with Abe no Seimei?

Well. Onmyoudou is just divination, which is just astrology.

The four gods are very much tied to the Gogyo (five elements), which is half of the basis of Onmyoudou (the other half is yin-yang).

We know it's specifically the Taoist Gogyo and not the Buddhist Godai (another thing with 5 elements), because Seiryuu specifically says his domain is “wood” and “wood” is not present in the Godai.

If you’ve seen other media with Abe no Seimei, you may have heard of the 12 divine guardians (or divine whatevers, you get the idea). They’re shikigami employed by him, four of which are these four gods. I’m not entirely sure if it’s these four gods themselves, or if they just share namesakes.

(Also not to be confused with whatever other figures in Buddhism/whatever that come in twelves)

These 12 divine guardians also each correspond to a direction and the Chinese year zodiac.

The idea of the four gods is oddly extremely tied to Abe no Seimei, I assume because of the astronomy and astrology connection, so much that the gate to the Seimei shrine is the “shijinmon” or “four gods gate”, and also the pillars with the four gods carvings that show up in the manga as well.

Abe no Seimei tangent! According to legends, Abe no Seimei's mom was a white fox, Kuzunoha, often considered a youkai, but also sometimes said to be the envoy of a god or is a god herself.

In other words. What I’m trying to say is. I want to see fox Haruaki. (OP's worldly desires)

Also, look at this fun story about how Seimei died.

Tbh, I don’t know how much of this is common knowledge. I’ve seen a pretty big variety of people reading youkaigakkou, from people who are hearing about youkai for the first time to people who know absolutely everything about onmyoudou and onmyouji. I guess in this essay so far, the Abe no Seimei stuff is more towards the “everyone knows this” end of the spectrum and the Heian era urban planning is “who the fuck knows this”.

Youkaigakkou Geoguessr

That was a lot, so here’s me messing around on google maps for a little bit.

This panel was changed slightly in the volume release, but these are the Toji pagoda, the Fushimi Inari Shrine torii gates, and Kyoto Tower.

At the start of ch83, they’re at Nijo Castle.

When Haru hears Byakko’s voice and runs off, this is probably where this panel is. I can’t get an exact angle from google street view, but it probably looks like the panel if you’re on the sidewalk. The parking sign, tree, and road sign line up almost exactly, and the building looks roughly right. (Seimei shrine also marked on the map for reference)

Mans casually sprinted 1.5km. You go king.

Seimei shrine is pretty cool. Sensei got to go there for photo references. It never really occurred to me how weird featuring real places in a manga would be, as cool as it always is, all the paperwork you probably have to do. (They have a link to apply for that on the website) They have a wall with Ema (wooden plaques) written by actors, authors, filmmakers and mangaka that feature the shrine in their works. I wonder if Tanamai sensei got to write one.

This page was also changed in a pretty big way in the volume release.

I mentioned this in my TL note, but this is referencing the reports of taxi drivers ferrying ghosts, especially after major natural disasters.

Yasaka shrine, roughly 3km straight line distance from Seimei shrine, 5km on the road. I’ll take the manga at its word as the closest Ebisu shrine lol. That panel in the manga specifically would be the west gate, which lines up with the road they probably took (straight south and then east).

The main deity enshrined there is Susanoo-no-Mikoto, but there’s a bunch of shrines on the grounds dedicated to different gods, one of which is to Ebisu.

Specifically, it’s the “kitamuki-ebisu-sha”, or “north facing Ebisu shrine”. Because it… uh… (checks compass) faces north… I guess…? The interesting trivia about this is that Ebisu is written like “蛭子” instead of “恵比寿” (though it’s read as “ebisu” all the same)

蛭子 is more commonly read as “Hiruko”. (Anybody watch Summer Time Rendering here?)

Ebisu is thought to originate from the first child of Shinto creation myth big names Izanagi and Izanami, Hiruko, meaning “leech child” because he was born without bones, and was cast into the sea and floated ashore somewhere. In a popular version of the story, he washed ashore in Hokkaido, to be raised by an Ainu guy called Ebisu Saburou. (Or sometimes this guy is an Ainu deity? I cannot find a reliable primary source for this. This name comes up fairly frequently but I can’t pin it down.) I’ve also seen claims that “Saburou” is a generic name meaning “third child”, and since he is definitely the first child, that the “first two” are Izanagi and Izanami.

In any case, this would make him the older brother of Susanoo-no-Mikoto, who I’m not saying has any connection to any Mii-kuns we know of, but you know.

I got to the image limit, so the post gets split here.

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4

[cometchasr]

but why do strata malls feel so alive

its not because they're strate malls. well, it is. but it's more than that.

it's because it's full of small businesses. there are no corporations in beauty world, or queensway shopping centre, or golden mile complex (before it closed... sob). it's where all the weird little shops are. and it's beautiful.

your chinese medicine stores, the place where you print stuff, sorts equipment, the whole place just screams. old. because it is. because its where everything that got kicked out when modernity and capitalism came stays. its where it all dies as no one wants to work in these jobs because they're too low paying.

[imbasic-oppossum]

The seat of the car was cool

against my skin, almost burning. Outside, people were laughing, screaming, blasting horrible music. Lights flickered against the window pane. I stared listlessly outside, watching shapes tumble past, kids stumbling home drunk as a skunk. My fingers traced lines against the icy window. I could feel the vodka and ecstasy mingling in my blood, turning my into a buzzing glowing creature.

The door opened behind me. Thump. The door shut, and I turned. Oh. Him. Yay. His horrible black wavey hair that hung below his ears. His eyes bugged out and practically melted into fudge. Horrible. His skin was pasty white and lumpy with acne. I hated his face.

"Go away please," my voice flowed out shrill and pathetic.

I swatted at his arm, wanting him gone, and instead I slumped a little, leaning onto his arm. I didn't pull away, I narrowed my eyes at him. He was blinking slowly and calmly. His mouth turned down at the edges and he looked so much like a sad puppy that a giggle bubbled from my throat. He rubbed his eyes, his arm prying out from under me.

"Why are you always mad at me?" He asked, his words squeaky and tearful.

I smiled a little, blinking slowly. Frankly, I wasn't mad at him. But I was always under my own skin.

"Because you're just the most annoying guy I've ever met," I covered my mouth, smothering another giggle.

He nudged me with his shoulder and I slid closer against him. his smell was comfortable, and I liked his gray sweatshirt. It felt cool against my cheek, and smelled like Tide laundry detergent and sawdust. My head fell against his shoulder, and I could feel him letting out a soft little sigh.

"I'm high," my voice broke in a sob, and I knew it was because of the drugs.

I could feel him shifting to look at me, could practically smell the concern. It was endearing in a way.

"Why would you do that?" He admonished, like a mother, so gently correcting my latest disobedience.

"B-because..." my words trailed away.

He was turning over, facing me now. He had to hold me up because I was slumping over like a doll.

"Why?" He was so insistent.

I tried to bat his hands away, but my own were so wobbly and distorted that they did no more harm than a kittens swat.

"What did you do?" He asked, and I had to look at his ugly eyes.

"The body," I blubbered. "I did that."

Had I said that? Oh well. There were better things to think of. I felt so much better! I smiled at him, and wondered why his face looked so silly.

"You means those pranks? The ones the crazy people saw?" He asked, his neck craning, his face trying to follow mine. I let out a nice dramatic sigh.

"Yes, because he said so, and I don't want to think about it." I tried twisting away but he really did need to lay off.

"Wait, who did?" I got the strength to shove his hands away.

He glared fiercely at me, those horrible melting eyes. I leaned against the door of the car, looking at him dizzily. He sighed, climbing out of the car, the gravel crunching humorously under his tennis shoes. The door slammed. Click. Oh, big scary man locking me in. I tugged at the door. Child lock. I felt queazy, and laid my head back. The ceiling swirled and dipped and I smiled to myself. I was so tired.

I didn't really feel the vomit, I just heaved it onto the floor of the car. The burn of alcohol and bad Chinese food twisted through the air and I must've passed out.

I was being moved around, gently, soft words telling me you're alright, I'm here now, we're gonna go home.

Idiot. He smelled nice and I buried my face in his neck. He was moving me, arms lifted, cold air, nice comforters. I tugged his shirt and I was pushed off. 

I slept for hours and hours, drowning in everything Id ingested. Soon all memory of the body was gone.

[mike-wachowski]

so what was the deal with that offscreen supercorp phone call, huh?

AKA: how i think the Lena/Kara call with Lena breaking the news to kara that she's going to Ireland went 

Kara knows it’s Lena calling before she even picks up her phone. 

She has a different ringer set for Lena, you know. It’s nothing special, really, just a softer, slower Apple-provided tune than the chirpy, high-pitched ones she uses for the rest of her family. She had changed it right after she and Lena had made up, the real time, right before she had been... taken, before everything that happened after. 

She never wanted to miss another call or text from Lena. 

She had hoped she’d get to hear it more before the Phantom Zone. 

She had almost forgotten she’d changed it, and when the plucky ukulele chords fill the dreary silence in Kara’s apartment, she jumps if only for the fact that it’s been so long without noise in her studio and in her head that it startles her more than excites her. 

But then Kara recognizes the tune, and that silly, familiar feeling of warmth floods her chest when she realizes it's Lena calling her, and she only lets the ringtone play out for three and half more seconds before she scrambles for her phone and slides the little green arrow over to take the call. 

“Lena!” She greets her friend (her friend, her friend, her friend again, her brain echoes joyfully). “What’s up? Everything okay?”

“Hi Kara,” Lena responds, voice soft and level, and it makes Kara’s heart thump just once out of time at the knowledge that Lena is smiling when she talks, because Kara can hear the upturn in her lips as she speaks. “I’m doing alright, evidently. How are you?” 

Kara looks around at her empty apartment, the dim lights, the noise-cancelling headphones tossed haphazardly on her couch. “I’m okay.” 

There's a quiet, nasally sigh from the other end of the line, and Kara can practically hear Lena evaluating a response to Kara’s blatant lie. 

Secretly, Kara wishes Lena would call her out on it. Say I know you aren’t okay, to force honesty from Kara in a way they had never breached before Lena knew everything, because the truth is, if anyone else were to ask, to call her out on the bullshit she knows she's giving everyone, she’d probably tense up, hide it, run away. She would lie again, because lying was what was comfortable for Kara these days. 

But if Lena were to ask… maybe Kara could stand having her know. Maybe if anyone were to see Kara right now, for the wreck she saw herself as, Lena would understand. 

Kara waits for the end of the pause. She waits for Lena to say what she’s secretly begging to hear.

But it doesn’t come. 

Lena does speak again, but what she actually says is: 

“That’s good to hear, Kara. Listen, I need to talk to you about something.” 

“Um,” Kara sucks in a breath, a little ragged, and hopes Lena doesn’t hear it through her receiver.. “What did you want to talk about?” 

“Kara, seeing you with your father… seeing you reconnect with him... It's made me consider some things.” 

“Okay…” Kara nods along, not really following. Is Lena going to try and get in touch with Lillian again?

“I think I’m going to-” Lena halts for one, two, three seconds, and in the clear silence Kara wonders what she’s thinking. When she continues, Kara doesn’t have to wonder much longer. 

“I think I’m going to go back to Ireland. I want to try and reconnect with my mother, with my old home, in any way I can.” 

Kara’s whole body tenses. She squeezes her phone with a trembling hand so clenched she hears the quiet crack of her screen, and sucks in tight, panicked breath. 

“I’m so sorry, Kara. I know you just returned, and I don’t want you to think I'm avoiding you- in fact, if you need me to stay, please tell me and I’ll turn around right now-” 

At that, Kara refocuses. She would never let Lena abandon her dream for her. Hasn’t Kara held her back, hurt her enough already? Doesn’t Lena deserve to find her happiness, even if it means flying all the way across the world from her? 

“No, Lena, no.” Kara steadies her voice, surprised herself at the clarity and force behind her hollow words. “If you need to go to Ireland, if you need to reconnect with your mom, I completely understand. I’ll always support you… you know that.” 

Lena pauses again, like she’s weighing the truthfulness of Kara’s words against the heart she knows so well. 

“But what about what you need, Kara?” 

Kara sighs. I need you, Lena, I need you, she wants to scream. But that would be selfish. And Kara has been selfish enough in their time. 

“I just need some potstickers and a good nap, I think.” She says in her cheeriest, most playful Kara Danvers tone she can muster, and pointedly ignores the tears beginning to slowly flow down her cheeks. 

“Okay,” Lena mutters, and then louder, more reassuring: “Okay. Okay. I’ll keep in touch, Kara, I promise.” 

“Right,” Kara nods, because it’s all she can do, really. “Um- how long- how long do you think you’ll be gone for?” 

Lena sighs, and Kara already knows the answer to her question, and she hates it. “I’m not sure, Kara. I don’t really know what I’m looking for.” 

“Okay- that’s okay! Take as much time as you need!” She presses one palm to her left eye, hoping to maybe stifle the tears or ground herself in the pressure of her touch. “Just, um. Don’t be a stranger.” 

“I won’t,” Lena quickly assures her, rushing her next words. “I’ll call, and I'll text you as much as I can, and the rest of the friends too, and if you ever need my help I can remotely operate parts of the tower from my laptop...” Lena trails off. Their paused silence hangs over the phone call, the awkward trepidation from both sides apparent when they both realize the end of the conversation is coming. 

“I’ll miss you.” Lena finally breaches through, sounding slightly choked up herself, but Kara ignores it for the sake of her own heart and mind. 

“I-” I love you. I love you. I love you. “I’ll miss you too.” 

Another period of silence lapses, and Kara wipes the last of the tears she’s now managed to quell on her sweater sleeve. 

“Well, I suppose I should let you go.” Lena whispers. Kara doesn’t want to let her go, because the panicked, irrational side of her is screaming that this could be the last time she hears from Lena, and she can’t even see her. But she remembers what selfishly holding onto Lena had done to their relationship before, and maybe this is why Lena’s leaving. Maybe Lena needs to know Kara can let her go. 

So Kara does the worst thing. She makes the hard decision. 

Kara says goodbye. 

“Yeah,” She says, shaking out all the voices in her head screaming for Lena to stay. She wants to backtrack, to say what she really needs right now is for Lena to come over right now and hold her tight so she can dissolve and know she’s still safe. She remembers a similar position, once, but the roles had been reversed, then; Kara used to be the one holding Lena through her those moments she felt like she was slipping through. But even those moments are marred now, disfigured by the lens of all the lying Kara had been putting Lena through.. Lena must feel it too. 

So Kara says goodbye, if not to ask anything more from Lena than her forgiveness. 

“Bye, Lena,” Kara's eyes are clenched closed. “I’ll see you when you get back.”

“I’ll see you soon, Kara,” Lena says, sounding sincere enough for Kara to almost believe it. “Goodbye.” 

And then the line goes silent. 

Kara puts her phone screen down on her coffee table. She doesn’t have the energy right now to look for the cracks in her screen she heard earlier-doesn’t think her heart can stand seeing the physical manifestation of her loss. 

So she coughs out a weak sob- lets herself break for just a minute- and then grabs her phone, eyes still closed, and calls up the one person who’s number she can always navigate to even with her eyes closed. 

“Hey Alex?” Her sister picks up after one ring. “Can we have a sister night? I don't think I- I can be alone right now.” 

And when Alex comes over half an hour later, wine and Chinese in tow, Kara tries not to think about how badly she wishes it were Lena holding her at the edge of the couch as she falls apart.

[imthebadguyyy]

Loved your first fic of Lewis!💛

Can you make one where Lewis Hamilton and Y/N have a fight and have been living separately and then Lewis comes to meet Y/N one evening and makes an excuse that his toothbrush is with Y/N? And then Lewis confronts Y/N that he knows Y/N still love him but won't admit?

..

* I know this is a very specific prompt. Bare with me. I just wanted more Angst/ Fluff with Longing for each other and Deep feelings and keep it Non-explicit. *

A/N - I'm so glad you liked the fic 😊

We're Meant To Be

Pairing - Lewis Hamilton x Reader (female)

Fandom - F1

Summary - After a messy fight, you don't know where your relationship stands. But when love is that strong, an argument can't stand in the way.

Warnings - Angst, fighting, swearing

Angered shouts. Tears of frustration. White noise. Desperate pleads. And then silence. That's what your neighbours would describe if they were asked to describe what they had heard from your house. An argument that seemed to have started over nothing, had blown up into a full scale fight. When had it become this bad? Only yesterday, you two had had a date night at home, with movies and wine. Everything was perfect. But then, suddenly everything seemed to go down a downward spiral.

Your relationship with your boyfriend had always been calm, it had been the type of love where you just loved each other with all your hearts, where fights were an incredibly rare appearance. You were both working, and he was away at races most of the time, so usually, you didn't waste time fighting, something that was an unnecessary waste of time in your opinion. But then, something had just switched for a second. It was after the race in Baku, and it hadn't gone well. Lewis had been heartbroken, after coming P15, and had heavily berated himself for it. To make him feel better, you had taken a couple of days off work. to just be with him and give him company to feel better.

It had been on the third day of you spending time with him that he had made an offhand comment that had struck a nerve with you. "I wish you could be there at race weekends more often. It's like you don't care enough about the races" The comment had pissed you off, to put it lightly. "What do you mean, I don't care about the races? I watch all of them Lewis, I'm always supporting you" you had practically seethed at him. "Don't get all huffy, darling, all I'm saying is that the other girlfriends and wives come quite often, but you only come to like three races a year" he had said, already regretting his words. "Maybe that's because I have a job?! I work for my living, and I love my job. I don't have time to fly around the world to accompany you to your races, and its damn hard to get leave off of work anyway, I was lucky to even get a week off of work, and you want me to be there every weekend? It's not possible for a working person, Lewis" you had said, anger bubbling in your voice, pulling away from him to sit up straight. "I know, I just meant-" "No, I know what you meant. I'm sorry I can't always be there, and don't you think I feel bad when I can't be there for you ?" "I know you do, I shouldn't have brought this up. But can you come for the next race?" He had asked, not looking at your eyes, regretting the answer. "I... can't. I have a really big meeting coming up and-" "And you can't come I get it"

And he had just left. You had felt your heart shatter, hating yourself for being so harsh with him. But it was true, you were a very hardworking person, and you had worked damn hard to get to where you were, successful at your job, one of the best in your field. It took years of hard work and perseverance and you were proud of it. But a part of you also knew that Lewis didn't deserve any of the crap you had given him, and you also knew that he was right, the other guys had their partners to support them during various race weekends, and you only showed up to one or two of them. He was well in his rights to tell you that. And you hated how it had ended.

You all alone, in your house, in a cold and empty bed, in a quiet house with silence that was much, much more deafening than words ever could be. It was heartbreaking, to see a future you had dreamed of just shattering in front of your eyes, dreams of having a family of your own with him fluttering away like wisps of smoke, the burning flames leaving only a heartbroken mess of a human being behind. Was that what it felt like? To be burned and left to turn to ashes, when a person that knew exactly how to ignite your flame just left you to burn away? To have someone who could ignite your all consuming passion, and turn you to putty in his hands, who could mould you back into shape, leave you to melt into a liquid through his fingers to just lay on the ground, a sad, broken, person.

And here you were, lying on your bed, the sheets that had warmed the both of you on cold nights, or been home to your pleasure laced activities now offering only some of the warmth it used to, cold and unforgiving, as you turned your pillow for the fifteenth time, neither side cool anymore. Even the pillow didn't want to forgive you, the sweat settling in on your neck again, beads of sweat running down your forehead again. The pulled curtains shielded you from the over bright sunshine, your damp hair sticking to your shoulders and neck. Your eyes, red rimmed and tired, shut to protect them from the faint light in the room, the tiredness not permitting you to even open them to look in the dim light of your room.

Somewhere near you, your phone buzzed again, for what felt like the hundredth time in three days. It had been three days, three long, painful days since you and Lewis had fought and not seen each other, and those 72 hours had ripped a part of your soul out. You had spent those three days in bed, your leave days still saving you from getting out of bed and dragging your body to office. Was your relationship over? Were you never going to meet the love of your life, the man you were destined to be with again? Sighing, you rolled over, pushing the damp strands of hair away from your face. Using strength you didn't know you had, you pulled yourself up, feeling your head spin.

Slowly, you made yourself walk into the kitchen, grabbing a piece of bread and popping it into the toaster. Then you splashed some water on your tired face, shuffling over to the bathroom to brush your teeth. After finishing your toast, you peeled off the sweaty shirt you had pulled on when he had left, realising with a pang that it was Lewis's nightshirt you were wearing, a purple one he loved. Dropping it into the laundry basket, you turned on the shower, stepping under the warm shower. The warm spray untangled the knots in your matted hair, as you soaped your body and hair, fresh tears rolling down your cheeks as memories of your showers together with Lewis came flooding back, as heartbroken sobs wracked your form again.

An hour after the not so great shower, you found yourself in another shirt belonging to Lewis, the bed in fresh sheets and covers, your pillow finally cool on both sides. You were clean and refreshed, albeit heartbroken, waiting on your takeout Chinese food and ice cream. Just as you lay there, scrolling through your Netflix account to watch some episode of FRIENDS to help you keep your spirits up, the doorbell rang. The thought of flavourful Chinese food and ice cream was enough to lure you out of your bed again, bare feet padding across the wooden floor to go to the door. You grabbed your wallet, opening the door, to find not your dinner, but Lewis, at the door, in one of your favourite sweatshirts on him. Did the clothes make you feel better? No. In fact, it just shattered your heart further.

"What are you doing here?" was the predictable line that left your lips. "I um, I left my toothbrush at your place. Can I have it back?"

"I beg your pardon? You left your toothbrush? You came back for a toothbrush, but not for me? Is that all I mean to you?!" you said, anger and a hint of sadness creeping into your tone. "You do mean a lot to me" he replied in a sigh. "Look, I didn't actually leave my toothbrush. That was a lie, and wow, I'm just realising how stupid that sounded, I'm sorry" His words were met with silence. The sadness in your eyes said it all. You were upset. Of course you were. "I don't have any toothbrushes except mine, so please leave" Before you could shut the door in his face, he pushed it back open, stepping into the house on his own.

"No do not come in here, please just get out!"

"No" was his frustrating reply. "What do you mean no? I said get out of my house!" "Not until we stop fighting and talk about what the hell happened!" Lewis yelled back, matching your tone. "Why the hell do you care?!" "Because I still love you damn it, I always have, and this stupid fight cannot, and should not break us apart!"

Your burst into tears. Sliding down against the wall, you buried your face in your hands, the sweatshirt arms covering your face as you sobbed. In an instant, Lewis was walking across to you, strong muscled arms wrapping around your shaking frame. "I'm sorry" you managed to blubber out, "I thought it over, and I don't go to support as often as I feel I should, and I'm sorry"

"No my darling, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said all that to you. You work so hard baby, and I'm so proud of you. And I know that you try to come whenever you can, and I love you so much for that. I'm sorry, and I never shouldv'e asked you to prioritize my passion over yours" rubbing your shoulders softly, he let his chin rest on top of yours. Sniffling, you let your head rest on his shoulder. The soft hiccups that left your lips broke his heart even further, something he hadn't thought possible.

The last 3 days had been pure hell for him. He had missed you, God, he had missed you. He had missed having you in his bed in the morning, tracing patterns on your bare skin. He had missed leaving kisses on your soft cheeks and hands and on your cute nose, missed smiling against your skin as you giggled. He had missed you playing with Roscoe, the doggo following the both of you around the house. Even Roscoe had missed you, sniffing around the house for your familiar smell, cocking his ears up and looking at his dad questioningly.

He had missed your perfume, the scent filling his senses, intoxicating him in the best way possible. He missed you curling up to him, playing with his hair or tracing his tattoos, leaving little kisses around the compass tattoo, tracing his 'Still I Rise' tattoo, missing the goosebumps that would rise on his skin when you traced Michelangelo's Pieta on his skin, and kissed the family and faith tattoos on his sternum. He missed you everywhere, and it had taken three days for him to realize that your presence grounded him. Your presence was something he needed, not to survive, he had done that before, he needed you for his happiness.

And having you in his arms, crying over what he had said? It shattered his heart. And he wanted to just fix everything, to bring everything back to normal. Stroking your hair softly, he kept his lips pressed to your ear, whispering soft "I love you's" and "I'm so sorry baby's" and "I'm here for you's" into your ear, feeling his heart lighten ever so softly when your sniffles decreased and your grip on yourself relaxed.

Moving up to meet his eyes, you moved so you were at eye level with him. "So we're both idiots who are sorry?" You murmured, running your hand up to his collarbone. With a soft laugh, he nodded taking your hand into his, rubbing his thumb over yours. "Fighting sucks" he mumbled pushing a stray strand of hair behind your ear. "It really does" your replied, moving so you were straddling his waist. "Let's never do that again, and let's just make a schedule. We can figure out when you can come and visit me, and I'll just deal with the fact that my ethereal girlfriend won't grace the race tracks every race weekend-" "It all sounds lovely but all I want right now is your lips on mine" you interrupted, bringing a smirk to his lips.

Leaning forward, he pressed his lips to yours, hand moving to maneuver your head closer to his, your hands moving up to cup his cheek, as your traced his jawline, his thumb running over your waist. Breaking apart softly, he let his forehead rest on yours. "I love you" he whispered softly. "I love you too" you mumbled back. Before he could lean back in, the doorbell rang again.

"Damn it. That's my chinese food and ice cream" you sighed, smiling when he laughed. "Was it that bad?" He asked, letting you get up to open the door. "Like you wouldn't believe it"

After getting the food and paying for it, you set two plates on the table and put enough on your plates. "You know what the worst part was about fighting?" "What was?" "Not waking up to you tracing my tattoos" "Aww that's what you missed?" You giggled, walking up to kiss the tattoos on his hands. "I really did. You're cute and adorable and you're all mine. That's why I don't wanna fight. Let's keep it that way" "I love you so much" "I love you too"

***

A/N - I'm so, so sorry I took so long to write this, I really suck at angst, and I hope this is what you wanted, the last thing I want to do is give you subpar work 😭😭

Anyways, have a great day 💙

[marvelous-harry]

A blurb where Harry is away for work n so is Florence but reader has book meetings so can’t go with any of them, one of them coming back on break surprise after a few weeks and reader hasn’t been taken care of herself at all like no food in fridge, being very concerned reader begging not to tell the other, angst

Home Alone Harry/Florence/Reader Words: 1.9K Summary: With Harry off on tour and Florence off shooting a movie, a series of meetings for your upcoming book leaves you home alone in London for a few weeks... it results in a lot of takeaways.

Jerking awake as I heard a noise, I sat up and looked around the bedroom, my heart racing in my chest. Hearing another noise, I dived onto the other side of the bed and pulled out the giant knife I had put under it before holding it up as I jumped out of the bed.

Quickly grabbing my phone, I ran over to the bathroom and closed the door, locking it quickly. My hands shook as I tried to get it open and dial 999.

The door to the bedroom squeaked as it was opened.

"I called the police!! And I have a knife!" I screamed as aimed the knife at the door.

"Oh god, babe. It's me!" Harry called out as he rushed over to the door. "It's okay, it's just me. Please tell the police not to come,"

Putting the knife down, I opened the door and punched Harry in the arm hard. "What the fuck is wrong with you?! Almost gave me a heart attack!" I groaned as I clutched my chest and took a deep breath. "Fuck,"

"I'm sorry, babe. I didn't mean to scare you just surprise you. Surprise!" Harry said as he opened his arms.

Taking a step closer, I hugged him tightly. "I'm very surprised. I've missed you!" I mumbled as I breathed in the smell of him.

"Did you tell the police to not come?" Harry asked as he rubbed my back.

"I never actually got as far to call them. My hands were shaking so bad, I think I only managed to dial 9," I replied as I looked at him with a smile. "For how long are you home?"

Harry smiled back and stroked my cheek. "Just a night. Have to fly out tomorrow at 3,"

"Not very long," I said as I tried to keep the smile on my face. For a split second, I almost wished he hadn't come cause now I had to say goodbye to him again. "What time is it anyway? I was sleeping when you tried to kill me," I pulled back and walked over to the bed.

"It's four in the afternoon, why were you asleep?" Harry asked as he stepped into the bathroom to grab the knife. Making a note of the mess, he turned off the light and looked around the bedroom, noting the mess in there too.

"I might have fucked up my days and nights a little," I said quietly as I grabbed the chocolate wrapper on the bed and threw it into the bin, blushing as I saw all the other empty wrappers in it.

"Why are you staying up so late? You can't be sleeping all day. It's not good for you," Harry asked as he came over and put the knife on the nightstand before taking a seat next to me.

I shrugged and looked down into my lap.

"Are you having nightmares? Staying up late watching tv?" he asked as he put an arm around me.

"Your shows don't start before 2 or 3 usually and then I'm too excited after it ends so I usually stay awake an hour after it ends," I whispered.

"Baby," Harry said as he made me look at him. "That's why you're staying up? You've seen the show in person several times and you'll be seeing it several times more. It's very sweet but you need your sleep,"

"It's different!" I protested. "I have to see what you're gonna wear and every show is slightly different! And what if something happens? I need to know. I want to see every show. I feel like I'm there with you when I'm watching and I don't miss you as much,"

Harry sighed as he pulled me in for a hug. "Baby,"

I whined as I snuggled close. "Don't be mad! I haven't broken any rules so you can't be mad!" I told him as my stomach rumbled loudly.

"We'll discuss this later cause you can't keep staying up all night. Let's go downstairs and I'll cook us something," Harry said as he gave me a little kiss before standing. "Let's bring down the garbage that's up here so we can throw it out, and let's open a window cause it's very stuffy,"

"Okay," I mumbled as I walked over to the windows and cracked it open. Picking up the bin, I picked up a few more pieces of garbage before following Harry downstairs.

"We can order in? I'd love Chinese. Or Indian!" I quickly spoke up as I remember the state of the kitchen and the fridge. "You don't have to cook, you just got here," I smiled and grabbed his hand.

"It's okay. I'd love a home-cooked meal," Harry smiled as he walked into the kitchen.

"Okay, so, don't be mad," I said as I put the bin down and walked into the kitchen with him. Dirty dishes were overflowing in the sink and there were two bags of garbage just sitting on the floor, plus there was a stack of pizza boxes on the counter.

Harry took in the mess before heading to the fridge. Opening he saw that it mostly held just drinks and condiments, nothing to make a decent meal out of.

I bit my lip as I watched Harry close the fridge before moving silently over to the garbage. He counted the pizza boxes and looked at the bags which clearly showed all the takeaway containers.

"Baby," Harry sighed as he turned around and looked at me.

"I said don't be mad!" I whimpered as I pulled down the sleeves on my jumper and hid my hands inside.

"I'm not mad but I am worried. You're not getting good sleep and you're clearly not eating too good. The house is a mess," He looked at me concerned. "Are you okay? Have you been outside any? Gotten fresh air?"

I could feel tears stinging in my eyes and I had to look away cause I couldn't deal with the disappointment in his eyes.

"Come here," He said as he took a seat by the kitchen table and pulled up a chair opposite him.

Sniffling, I walked over and took a seat - looking down the whole time.

"Your health and well-being are one of the most important things to me. The habits that you've got going on right now aren't good for you, baby. You can't keep doing what you're doing," Harry said in a very determined tone.

"Please don't tell Florence," I sniffled as I looked at him. "I'll stop. I won't do it anymore, I'll do better but don't tell her," I asked him.

Harry smiled as he stroked my cheek. "We don't keep secrets from each other. You know that,"

Whimpering, I leaned against him and let out a little cry. "She'll be upset too. I didn't mean for it to happen but it's too difficult. I don't like being alone, I can't do it"

Harry wrapped his hands around me and swayed us back and forth lightly. "I know, baby, I know," he whispered. "I'm going to fix it,"

A few minutes later when I'd stopped crying and my stomach was rumbling even louder, Harry pulled back. "I'm going to order us some food. Can you be a good girl and take out all the garbage?" he asked with a smile.

Wiping my eyes on the sleeves of my jumper, I nodded. "Okay,"

Standing up, I grabbed the garbage bags by the counter and put them by the door before I started collecting everything else around the house. It was embarrassing just how much I ended up collecting and how many trips I had to take outside to get rid of it all.

Once I was done, I could hear Harry upstairs in the laundry room so I walked up the stairs slowly. As I stood at the top of the stairs, I sighed before walking into the bedroom instead of walking over to Harry. The bed had been stripped and the duvet was hanging out the window getting aired out.

"Fuck," I whispered as my eyes welled up with tears yet again. Hearing the door to the laundry room close, I sniffled and quickly wiped my eyes before turning around as Harry walked in.

"Food should be here within the hour. You okay?" Harry asked as he put the fresh sheets and blankets down on the bed.

"I'm fine," I replied as I tried giving him a smile.

Harry came over and put his hands around my waist. "Want to try again?"

I could feel my bottom lip trembling as I played with his cross necklace. "I'm really sorry," I stammered out. "You came all this way and I've ruined our time together cause I'm too stupid to function alone," I quickly put my hands over my eyes as I let out a sob.

Harry pulled me in for a tight hug. "Baby, you didn't ruin anything and you're not stupid!" he said firmly. "Do you hear me? You're so smart and clever. Plus any time I spend with you is priceless to me, it doesn't matter what we're doing,"

"You only have one meeting left right? Then you're going to come stay with me for a bit then you'll go see Florence. I'll talk to her about what's been going on so we can figure out the best way for you to be safe and happy at home until then," Harry told me as he rubbed my back.

I let out a loud sob and grasped onto him tightly. "No! I want to come with you now! I don't want to be alone anymore. I don't care about the meetings! Please don't leave me!" I cried.

Harry led me over to the bed so we could sit down and cuddle. "It'll be okay, I promise. We'll figure something out,"

--

"I'll see you in a week," Harry said as he stroked my cheek.

I nodded and gave him a little smile. "It'll go by fast I'm sure. Be there in no time, jet-lagged and ready to complain about the long flight,"

He glanced at his phone as it buzzed. "I can't wait. Remember, I've made you some meals, you can order takeaway one time and try and go to sleep at a decent hour," Harry smiled as he gave me a hug.

"I'll try," I whispered as I closed my eyes and hugged him as tightly as I could. "Now go! You don't want to keep your driver waiting!" I said as I pulled back and put my hands in my pockets.

"I love you," Harry said softly as he leaned in and gave me a gentle kiss.

Smiling, I kissed him back. "I love you too," I replied as he pulled back.

Harry picked up his little bag and opened the door. "7 days," he said as he stepped out.

"7 days," I said and watched him get into the car. Waving at him, I blew him a kiss before they disappeared from view. "It's just 7 days," I whispered as I closed the front door and locked it.

Turning off all the lights I grabbed the knife from the kitchen and headed upstairs. Crawling into bed, I ignored the tears running down my cheek as I put the knife back under the pillow and pulled the blankets over me. It was going to be a long week.

[that1fanficwriter]

A Night of Chaos

This lovely idea was requested by @bisexualbumblebeeblogs thank you! As always my asks are open to anyone! Feel free to drop by with a request, a question, or just to chat!

Pairing: Jonny Goodman x reader

AN: this isn’t based off of a singular episode I just put together some of my favorite antics to create absolute chaos. Also, I am currently on mobile so I am not able to add a keep reading even though it is very long.

As you stomped up the driveway to the Goodman’s house in the pouring rain you noticed an additional car terribly parked on the front stoop. Instead of trying to get to the front door you decided to just trudge around the side entrance to the kitchen. Before you could get to the door you noticed a man standing in the shadows that looked suspiciously like “the father: Martin Goodman.”

“Uncle Martin, what are you doing out here?” You called out to him.

“Ah hello my dear, there was a perfectly good loaf of bread that Jackie threw away. It only had a few moldy bits on it but she wouldn’t let me eat it in the house because we have company.” He explained.

“I see. Well, if you’re finished with your “perfectly good” moldy bread I can let you in.” You suggest.

“That would be lovely Y/N thank you. How has your relationship been doing with your male?” He inquires as you unlock the door.

“Ugh, god, not this again.” You groan, as you step inside. “Hi Aunty Jack!” You call out, as you blatantly disregard Martin’s previous question.

“Hi love! What a lovely surprise! What brings you around in this weather?”

“Mum is fighting with Larry for the third time this evening. I can’t take much more of it.”

“Well why don’t we get you out of your wet jacket and I’ll get you a cuppa. How does that sound?”

“That would be lovely Aunty Jack, thank you.”

“Of course love. Jonny and Adam are in the living room if you want to join them; please make sure they behave themselves.” She says before turning to Martin trying to sneak out of the kitchen, “MARTIN! Stop wearing your little miss muffet boots in the house! It’ll ruin my clean carpet!”

You quickly take your own wet shoes off and drop them by the front door before making your way to the living room.

“Ah hello puss face!” You say while sitting on Adam “and Jonny, the one I hate the least! How are you lads doing this fine and gloomy evening?” You ask, moving to sit between the two brothers with a cheery smile on your face.

“Come on Y/N, you know you love me.” Jonny says while trying to squeeze every last breath out of you.

“Yeah, I guess I do love you quite a bit JonJon.” You tease.

“How have Mum and Dad not figured out you two idiots are together yet?” Adams asks, flabbergasted.

“We’ll your dad is about as observant as a brick.” You state.

“Yeah, and we just avoid Mum all together.” Jonny adds.

“Oh Y/N dear, I didn’t know you were popping round.” Nellie says as she enters the living room.

“Grandma Nellie! I didn’t know you were here either! It is so good to see you again.” You say as you get up to give her a hug. “Who else is here?” You ask everyone, “I’m guessing you’re not the company Uncle Martin was referring to when he told me Aunty Jack made him eat his moldy bread out in the rain.”

“That would be Lou!” Nellie informs you.

“He’s her “lover”.” Jonny tells you with disgust.

Just then a short man, very formally dressed, walks into the living room. You make the educated and accurate guess that the angry looking man before you is Grandma Nellie’s Lou.

“Who are you?” He asks you.

You barely have time to tell him your name before he’s asking more questions.

“Why are you here? Are you dating the gerbil or the bean stalk?” He barks at you.

“My mum Val and I are close friends with the Goodmans and we live just down the street. My mum was fighting with her boyfriend again and so I decided to come over here instead of hearing that racket.” You explain.

“Alright, and are you dating little or large?” He asks you again.

You try incredibly hard not to laugh at the ridiculous names Lou is calling Adam and Jonny but one rogue chortle makes its way past your lips.

“What’s so funny?” Lou glares.

“I’m sorry, it’s just the nicknames you’ve given Adam and Jonny are hilarious!” You laugh.

“You filthy punk rockers are ridiculous!” Lou tells all three of you before sitting back down by Nellie.

“Is everything all right in here?” Jackie asks as she pops her head into the living room.

“We’re fine Mum.” Jonny says.

“Yeah, Y/N is just having a laugh at the terrible names Mr. Morris has been calling Jonny and I.” Adam adds.

“Alright, we’ll, dinner is almost done so if you all would like to come through to the dining room?” Jackie suggests. As everyone is moving to the dining room the doorbell rings. “Y/N, would you please check who’s at the door?” Jackie asks you.

“Of course Aunty Jack!” You call out to her. “I’ll be right back; save me a seat.” You whisper to Jonny before heading to the door.

“Hello Jackie?”

“Hi Jim.” You say, trying to stay pleasant.

“You’re not Jackie?” He asks.

“No, I’m not. I live just down the road.” You answer.

“Ah, I see. And you’re friends with…”

“Jonny.” You begin to say.

“Jonny, the short”

You cut him off; “the taller one.”

“Yes, the taller one.”

“What do you need Jim?”

“I wanted to return some fish Jackie so graciously let me borrow a few weeks ago.”

“Ok; well why don’t I just go fetch her real quick. Just wait here Jim.” You rush back to the kitchen to ask Jackie to deal with Jim. “Aunty Jack, Jim’s here to see you. See said he wanted to return some fish he borrowed a few weeks ago?”

“Of course he has to return week old fish right now.” Jackie complains “Why don’t you go ahead through to the dining room and I’ll bring everything in in a few minutes.” She tells you.

Once you walk into the dining room, you move to sit down at the corner beside Jonny before you notice Nellie and Lou eating each other’s faces right at the table.

“What is happening? And why is it happening at the table?” You exclaim.

“Grandma and Mr. Morris are snogging; again.” Adam groans in disbelief.

“Why does this happen every time? Just make it stop. I’d rather gouge my eyes out than watch this again.” Jonny complains.

But before anyone else can continue to complain the door bell rings again.

“I’m going to go check on that.” Jonny says, jumping out of his seat.

“I’m coming with you! I can’t stand to be in this room any longer.” You say.

“Me too!” Adam jumps out of his seat.

You all rush out of the dining room eager to get away from the Nellie and Mr. Morris. The three of you scurry down the hall and as Jonny opens the door to your mother sobbing on the stoop.

“Larry broke up with me!” She wales.

“Again? Mum, you can’t keep doing this.” You say, utterly disappointed.

“I know. Where’s Jackie?”

“She’s talking with Jim in the kitchen.” Adam says.

Everyone makes their way to the kitchen following behind a sobbing Val.

“Hi Jackie.” Val says, still crying.

“Another Jackie?” Jim asks perplexed.

“No Jim, that’s just my friend Val. You’ve met before.” She tells Jim. “I don’t think now is really a good time to continue this so why don’t you head home?”

“Oh Val what’s happened? Is everything alright.” Jackie asks Val.

“Nothing new happened,” you tell everyone, “Larry just broke up with her again.”

“Oh Val, I’m so sorry!” Jackie exclaims, embracing Val, “That’s just horrible. I can’t believe he broke up with you again!”

“Oh my god, let’s just go sit in the living room.” You suggest to the boys.

“Good idea, I can’t take much more of this crying.” Adam says.

Once you make your way to the living room you all are about to sit down when Martin bursts in from the garage, covered in something strange and without a shirt (surprise surprise).

“Dad, what happened?” Jonny asks in disbelief.

“Ah hello bambinos. Now don’t tell your mother but I accidentally threw away some of my old things that I told her I’d get rid of.”

“So then why are you covered in that?” You inquire.

“Ah well, I didn’t mean to throw everything out so then I had to go into the bin to get everything out.”

“Yes, that makes total sense.” Adam announces to the room.

“Well, I’d better head back to the garage, I need to finish taking everything to the shed.” Martin says.

“We are never going to be fed are we!” Adam says.

“The three of us could just go for a chinese and not tell anyone?” Jonny suggests.

“That sounds like a great idea. I’ll drive.” You say “Grab all your stuff and let’s get out of here before someone sees us.”