#wishing you the best anon! i hope this helped

[yanderes-galore]

Can I request a short scenario about Gojo falling in love with Sukuna’s favorite lover? They got unsealed first & was discovered by Gojo. Darling tried to escape one problem only to acquire an even worse one

Darling is gender neutral and it’s Romantic Yandere Gojo

~Anon~

The plot was a bit complicated yet vague so I hope the idea I came up with works ^^; I don't know much about the Heian Era so I am guessing. AU where Jujutsu High is actually Jujutsu University for the sake of ages and plot.

This deviates from the request a bit but I hope you enjoy it anyways :) The end is a bit butchered as I had no ideas :( The yandere behavior is vaguely implied, I wish this was executed better but I was working with what I had. Constructive feedback is appreciated.

Possible Manga Spoilers, Please read with caution.

One Long Century

Yandere! Satoru Gojo Story (Ft. Sukuna)

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Manipulation, Violence, Possessive behavior, Slight rivalry themes, Jealousy, Stalking, Darling hates relationships, Themes of toxicity in relationships, Delusional behavior, Forced relationship.

The Heian Era was known as a legendary time for Jujutsu Sorcerers. After all, this era was where Sukuna and Kenjaku originated from. Speaking of which, there was another Sorcerer that history recorded who dealt with these two.

You were Sukuna's favorite lover, out of all the partners the King of Curses had, you were his best. You were experienced in utilizing Curse energy, which made you a favorite. However, you never wanted to be tied to the monster.

Sukuna took you as a partner due to your abilities as a Sorcerer. While you were originally his enemy, he broke you in due to his strength. You were never stronger than him but he liked your potential. Truthfully, your plan was to die trying to take him out.

You never got such an easy fate.

No, instead Sukuna contacted Kenjaku to speak of immortality. You understood Sukuna wished to live forever, but you fully expected to die here. Unfortunately... Sukuna didn't want to waste such a good partner.

"Make them a cursed object, too. I want them to follow me eternally."

You were never like Sukuna. No, your morals were more pure than his. You had the morals of more modern Jujutsu Sorcerers.

Protect the weak... For you are strong.

Against your will you were made into a sealed cursed object. You reluctantly lay in wait for a time where you can awaken. With the body of a host... you can be reborn.

Even if you didn't wish it.

---

For a century your cursed object was passed around and stored. Legends and rumors told of your relationship with the King of Curses. It was often said that you could calm the King of Curses if things ever got out of hand.

Eventually, like some of Sukuna's fingers, you found your way into the protection of Jujutsu University in their Cursed Warehouse.

You weren't chosen to be reborn until enough of Sukuna's fingers were collected. Higher-ups realized that if something goes wrong they should have you ready. Which lead to a host being chosen...

And you being reborn.

It felt... strange to be reborn in the modern age. Everything was so different, from the amount of Sorcerers to even the clothes and buildings. You were brought back for a reason it seemed.

You feel like you're being judged.

You can't blame these modern Sorcerers for suspecting you. Sukuna was known for sadism and being known as his favorite lover didn't help. However, you did your best to prove your true allegiance.

Any side fighting Sukuna works for you.

You didn't meet Satoru Gojo until you were allowed to be "used". Their wording disturbed you, yet you try not to judge in turn. They have their reasons to be worried.

Unfortunately... meeting Satoru Gojo comes with reuniting with... Sukuna.

You were told that Sukuna had taken host in a student named Yuji Itadori. Satoru Gojo was given the job of being his teacher and being a handler. Your job?

Stick by them both... and keep Sukuna under control.

You loathed the idea... but you hated the idea of Sukuna going unchecked more. As a result, you comply with the order. This makes you part of Gojo's group.

It also gets you involved with Gojo and Sukuna... the blights of your life.

---

As expected, being in the group started uncomfortable for you. Gojo was curious of an ancient Sorcerer such as you. One who wasn't malevolent... but kept alive for some reason.

Admittedly you weren't as strong as Gojo... but you were up there.

You then met the younger students who accompanied him. Yuji (Sukuna's vessel, according to your intel), Nobara, and Megumi. They were all quite interesting and powerful in their own right... and over time you found yourself attached to them.

Then there was Sukuna, the King of Curses and your supposed lover. He festered within Yuji, much to your disgust. You dreaded whenever he took control.

You could never have a normal conversation with Yuji without Sukuna popping in to taunt you. He was unfortunately still flirtatious, seeing you as his lover. He didn't care if you hated him... just like all those years ago.

You wished you could just stay enemies with him.

You wished you weren't brought back.

Arguments often occurred between you and Sukuna. It was usually verbal as Gojo was around to prevent physical fights. For the sake of everyone around you.

Speaking of Gojo, you often spoke with him. You both often acted as mentors and guardians to your group. Originally, the air between you was tense.

Then Gojo realized he could get along with a strong Sorcerer such as you from ancient times.

You don't mind Gojo at first. He helps you adapt to modern times now that you're able to be out and about around other people. You two even bond well in battle against Curses.

Sukuna often mocks the fact Gojo is so close to you. The King of Curses is still possessive of his remaining lover. You often hear Sukuna vowing to take you back once he takes full control of his vessel, Yuji.

You plan on preventing that with Gojo.

You help Gojo train his students. For the most part you stay out of the way of other activities unless it's Sukuna related. Occasionally you even help with Kenjaku issues once those become known.

Soon months begin to pass and Gojo grows more... intrigued. He knew attachments could be dangerous, especially with an individual as mysterious as you. However...

It didn't stop Gojo from falling for someone he shouldn't have.

Gojo's obsession with you doesn't go unnoticed by Sukuna. In fact, he often acts out more around Gojo. Which leads to more work for you.

You begin to notice things when Gojo leaves your side less. He often excuses his actions as the higher-ups just wanting to keep you monitored. You believe it since Gojo is technically monitoring two dangerous Sorcerers.

In reality, Gojo can't keep his eyes off you.

He originally didn't want to think of the idea of being in love with you. Yet despite the difference in your eras and origins, Gojo still managed to be playful and interested in you. You even played along.

If anyone was worthy of Satoru Gojo...

It was you.

---

Gojo is really your only guide to getting around this new age. You have power, but without him you could've been misguided. At least, Gojo seems to think so.

As you work with Jujutsu University, Gojo only seems to grow closer to you. He often asks how you manage to get Sukuna under control and what you've learned throughout the ages. If anything, you're the most valuable asset he and the rest of the Sorcerers has other than Yuji/Sukuna himself.

Gojo's strange behavior doesn't get better as you work with him. It perplexes you. After all, you aren't that much of a threat. So why is he so close at all times?

If only you knew the true extent to his feelings.

You haven't thought much of romantic relationships due to your circumstances. After all, Sukuna is still around and he's turned you off to such relationships. Which is why it disturbs you when you notice Gojo's... obsession.

It's fitting that the strongest craves the strong, no matter how forbidden it is.

However, when you see the signs, you're reminded of how you were treated all those years ago. The possessive glares, then hostility towards those who don't accept you... it's familiar.

Gojo's much nicer and more playful than Sukuna...

But it appears they're both their own type of monster.

Whenever Gojo pulls you into an embrace, you shove him away. Whenever he playfully teases you, you go cold. You don't wish to be trapped again....

Yet Gojo never stops to consider his actions....

His hold on you is always tight. His confession for you was rather sudden once he did say it. When you tried to refuse, his behavior didn't change.

In fact he only seemed more violent towards those you fought against... Including Sukuna.

"We're good partners, aren't we?" He asked you, a smile on his face. "So wouldn't we be good... romantically?"

You hate that you still persist even now.

Even now, when you just want to rest, Gojo's there. You begin to dislike company of any type by this point. Yet you're forced to endure as a Jujutsu Sorcerer.

Originally you could deal with him being overly affectionate. The hugs were even originally comforting. You kept telling him you didn't like him romantically, but he seemed to ignore such a thought. You were tired of him constantly being by your side no matter where you go.

Although, snapping would only bring you trouble.

If you snapped, the higher-ups would order you exorcised and their control over Sukuna would falter. That or Gojo himself would seal you so you're harmless. As much as you hated it...

A century ago you told yourself serving Sukuna was your duty. Now, in modern times, you tell yourself that serving alongside Gojo is your duty. It didn't matter what happened as long as the weak were protected....

It was once again your duty to please.

Gojo was so focused on you two being strong together, he never thought about what you think. In his eyes, the strong belong together. No matter what.

Instead of piercing red eyes, you're met with glowing blue ones. Instead of the King of Curses, it's the strongest Jujutsu Sorcerer. There may be differences...

But in the end you're still left with a monster...

A monster that has so much more power over you... A monster that claims to love you... Just to take everything you have all over again.

A long century has passed... and nothing has changed.

"We'll be unstoppable, won't we, baby?"

[sunshinegremlin]

As an autistic person, is it okay to like Love on the Spectrum?

I liked it because I could relate to them, because they always asked before hugging someone (like the respect for another's personal space) etc. They showed (me) that dating, especially another autistic person, could be fun. And tbh, I've never dated, and looking at NT dating shows never made me want to try it.

I think it's totally okay for an autistic person to see the show as relatable!!! I think the show did well with showing relatability in the autistic people, and even in some of the families in all honesty. I think they even did well with lots of accommodations, like you mentioned.

My big issue honestly is just with how allistics viewed the show. It was really hard to watch it with people who weren't autistic (cue lots of ableism from them 😫) but honestly before I watched it with them I kinda found it relatable and likeable too! If I had watched it with another autistic person it probably would've been enjoyable to watch.

When I first heard of the show before seeing it I was so excited about the idea. Sadly however, I think there are issues with some of the content in the show, such as functioning labels and some stuff from the counselor (psychologist? Don't remember, sorry!) As well as how sometimes it felt like autistic people were infantized. It should be acknowledged that every show is going to have problematic issues (I feel like it's kinda sadly unavoidable). Also I felt like the target audience wasn't autistic people and was instead NT ppl, which just felt uncomfy to me. Acknowledging the problems and still finding parts of the show enjoyable/relatable/etc. is 10000% okay!!!!

(I feel like if the show was made with a mostly/if-not all autistic production team then it would've been AMAZING bc those issues would've been diluted heavily.)

For an example if it helps, I really like The Umbrella Academy on Netflix! Unfortunately, the show is rampant with anti-semitism and general issues and flaws and problematic things. I can acknowledge those issues and still find things to enjoy about the show! Things are RARELY ever completely good/bad, and most entertainment has a lot of nuance to dig through. There are some amazing dynamics to be found in The Umbrella Academy, but there are also a lot of issues.

TL;DR: problematic-ness and enjoyability/relatability can coexist in entertainment!!!! I'm glad you found relatability in the show (I did too despite the issues!) And pls don't feel too discouraged to enjoy that relatability by the problems with the show and with people's opinions; if you need anything more anon pls send an ask or even DM me! 💛

[spearxwind]

not to sound weird but what was that work you put in to get where you are 🙏 i want to improve my life so bad but have no clue where to start. even a general gist of things

You dont sound weird! I think it's commendable to want to change your life for the better, and I want to help in any way I can :D

This is also my own perspective but I think a lot of it could be universally applied if you look at it through different lenses of ppls different situations. This also got rly long so I'm putting it under a readmore ^^;

So I had pretty much been isolating myself with increasing ferocity for years until recently. Even when trying to reach out to people I was extremely closed off, keeping my feelings behind many walls and chains always. A lot of my hard work has come from undoing all of that fuckup. I put all my eggs into my online friendships (and even then had a hard time with them).

My behavior was a cluster of personal garbage, learned mannerisms from keeping bad company, and hardwired reactions to specific behaviors. It's something pretty hurtful to realize when you do realize it, but that doesn't mean that you are a bad person or a failure or anything like that. It just means that you have certain bare minimum survival behaviors that worked before but now are only doing you damage, and you have to learn to undo them. (which is a great step!!)

Which brings me to what I have (painfully) learned over the past several years: the basis to any and every good relationship, romantic, platonic, family, or anything is crystal clear communication. Straight up for the love of god communication skills will save your life time and time and time again

And also like I said in earlier posts the solution to wanting to be more social is just BEING more social. This is arguably extremely hard, especially after years of "if they want me around they'll ask me" and always waiting to be invited but not wanting to bother anyone by asking if you can join NO!!!!!!!! GET THAT SHIT OUT OF YOUR BRAIN EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY!!!!! It really does NOT work that way at all. People will invite you to things if they see you express interest in them. The same way that in your head you think 'theyll invite me if they want me to go' if they dont see you express interest people will think you dont want to join. If you go someplace and just stay recluse because youre shy they likely will also think "theyre probably not comfortable or dont want to be here, so we wont force them". People are inherently kind and they are definitely NOT thinking about shunting you on purpose (and I am speaking this, genuinely, from personal experience)

While I was studying my major I got close to a group of people and thought of them as my friend group, but they always seemed cold to me, and I rarely got invited to hangouts because they seemed closer among themselves so I ended up always thinking that they didn't really want me around, and created all of these assumptions in my mind about them or what they thought of me.

Years later, recently, I found one of them again just... randomly while walking through the street and we started talking. And in my much better state of mind I asked about this whole thing because I wanted to know how the rest of the group was doing (I care very much for them still) and he revealed to me that THEY were the ones who thought I was shutting myself off of the group bc I didnt wanna be close to them. Which just blew my mind but it made a lot of sense and explained a lot. I was always on my phone too, talking with my internet friends (because it was my comfort zone), so what they'd assumed was that I already had a friend group that I was invested in and so I wasnt going to prioritize them. SO basically this whole thing ended up being resolved with clear communication and would have been solved much earlier if I had just spoken up about it and gotten braver (though my mental state did not let me at the time)

Anytime you are making up assumptions and ultimatums in your mind without communicating them to the other party you should stop and very much go and speak out loud to the other party (or parties) it will genuinely do you good cause huge as hell brain snowballs do nothing but drown you in your own mind.

Also on the being social front, if you dont have the practice in then it will be hard but a lot of it is very much "fake it till you make it" and I genuinely cannot recommend that enough. Inject yourself into conversations and places and act like yourself unapologetically because the secret isnt to craft a persona that you think people will like, its just being yourself and finding people who will love you for who you are. And like I said I just got invested in other ppls plans and asked to be able to go to places, and oftentimes just by expressing interest i got invited "oh I love this show very much!!" "well we have a plan to watch it at my pals house do you wanna come?" "we were planning on going to X place this week" "omg that sounds so cool can I come with" "of course!" Generally people will respond with "the more the merrier" so please dont be afraid to ask. And even if you get a rejection or two it's fine, don't let it discourage you. Some plans are simply not meant to be, and that's totally fine too!

Something else I worked for was reestablishing contact with old highschool friends I'd lost and I missed terribly. I went out of my way to find them again (old phone numbers, old emails, old instagram accounts that hadnt posted since 2019), and I found them!

And most of them really missed me too and were absolutely thrilled I contacted them again, we picked up right where we left off eight years prior. With a lot to catch up to but its genuinely so nice to have them in my life rather than just melancholically thinking about them and wondering if they hated me or anything. Turns out that they had also thought to contact me as well or had tried and lost my phone, or some of them even thought that it was better to leave things as they were to not "stir up shit" so we were all stuck in the same loop of insane thinking without actually confirming it until one of us (me in this case) finally broke the ice (and it took a damn long time too)

The thing is, people are just like you. We all have our own mental nonsense to fight, and we all have our assumptions and propensity to think ourselves into the grave, that's why its so so so so important to communicate things as clearly and as often as possible. Bearing your suffering alone will only make you miserable in the end, and your circle is there to help you

As a last note, I do want to say I have been incredibly lucky, because the friend group I've been adopted into I have met through that one friend from uni that I just HAPPENED to find on the street. I could have not waved him over on the street and just kept walking with my music on and ignored him. I could have said 'no' to his offer to get dinner that day if I'd wanted to be home earlier. I could have never spoken up about liking eurovision and never gotten invited to the hangout where I met my bf. And none of this would have ever happened at all. But that just strengthens my advice of "just say yes and reach out of your comfort zone" because you never know where it's going to lead you!

All this to say:

Communicate clearly with your peers to reduce misunderstandings. More likely than not they'll be in the same boat as you are. (Also extra note. Communication works BOTH WAYS. It needs to come from both parties. It is also a skill you have to nurture and hone!!)

Be kind!! and be loving!! and be yourself unapologetically!!

reach out to people the same way that you'd want to be reached out to. It sucks that sometimes (even often) you have to be the one to do it, but you eventually reap what you sow and people will learn that they can reach out to YOU

People will respond in kind to you being nice to them and a positive energy in their life. Some people will take advantage of it yes, thats just how things are, and its something you have to learn to recognize but you should never let that steel your heart. It is so so so important to remain kind and loving the world needs it so much. We're all out here trying to make our own lives and our loved ones lives a little bit brighter <3

[coyoteclan]

Hi! I'm doing my own Clangen and there's periods of long inactivity, where nothing happens at all. Have you dealt with that? How do you fill it?

I haven't had too many inactive moons yet, but I have had a few where there's no/very little inactivity, moon 9 being the biggest example of it lol (literally nothing happened at all). When it does happen though, I try defaulting to their relationships with each other and their little uh. personal status blurb under their name? If you can call it that, but I kinda just take it as a bit of free lore/story building time where I get to choose a bit more of what I want them to be doing!

I mean tbh you can go pretty crazy with some of the smallest little things it gives you sometimes. It can be kinda stressful to see "Nothing interesting happened this moon" but the little flavor text and relationship tab can be used as GREAT inspo when you really need it (if coyoteclan was more Rufus-central I could use this to show off how he got where he is)

alternatively you could totally use the longer stretches for world building! Show off some of the territory, maybe your cats have a little quirk to the way they do things that you haven't been able to show off yet. Have something from a previous moon you didn't feel like putting in at the time? Could be great backup content for an empty moon!

And if absolutely nothing happens at ALL for a long while? try skipping a few more moons ahead until you hit something and use that to figure out what your cat's might've done during the quiet!

[windvexer]

Thank you for taking the time to read this. I'm not even quite sure how to articulate what I want to ask. I have religious trauma- specifically Christian- and am presently in an environment where this is being aggravated on the daily. When it comes to spirit work and witchcraft, in spite of a deep fascination with and desire to explore these practices, I feel like... to welcome them into my life on the level that they require would also be to open myself to the magical thinking inherent in this religious paradigm, and all the ways I would be violating it (and am already doing so by simply existing in ways seen as deviant, or sinful). I'm prone to succumbing to scrupulosity, and am perhaps wondering if you have any advice or experience in this regard. How to overcome it, or perhaps your opinion? I've been following you for some time, and you seem like a very intelligent, and level-headed person; I would value and deeply appreciate your feedback on the matter.

Previous anon (hopefully)- on that note, how much of magic do you think can be explained by confirmation bias? Thank you, again, for your time.

Hello, Anon.

Let's start with the easy bit!

I believe in literal magic. That is to say, I think magical power, spirits, & so forth, are actually real.

Therefore, I think no magic is explained by confirmation bias. If something is just confirmation bias, it isn't magic. I think there are very interesting discussions to be had about the intersection of personal perception and tinkering with reality, and I don't mean to disregard the nuances of the conversation.

I think there is a chance that what you might be asking is, "how often do people think they are doing Magic(tm) but are just experiencing confirmation bias?" to which I say, probably quite a lot.

I have very specific beliefs about how to accomplish magic, especially Witchcraft, which is one kind of way to work magic. I think very many people who are intending to do magic, aren't.

[...] to welcome them into my life on the level that they require would also be to open myself to the magical thinking inherent in this religious paradigm

When you say "this religious paradigm" do you mean Witchcraft, or Christianity? I suspect what you're saying, but I'm not 100% sure, is that to embrace spirit work and witchcraft is to also breach a barrier you've built to protect yourself against your scrupulosity.

I think this prior ask might be helpful to you.

I don't at all mean to try and speak in a general theological sense, but only out of personal experience:

I was raised Christian and it did leave me with Problems, one of those being the tricky matter of love.

I recall in Sunday school, we watched a video with puppets or something, that taught us how to correctly think about love, and how to correctly feel love. This was twenty years ago or so, and I don't remember the details, but it was like this:

"You might say that you love a cheeseburger, but do you? NO! You like a cheeseburger, but you love God. "You might say that you love watching TV, but do you? NO! You like watching television, but you love God."

I still think about this sometimes. We were a lot of children in a room, being taught that the only true love that's acceptable to feel is towards this specific deity (I think parents got a piece of the pie, which was nice for them).

We learned lots and lots about love, and how God's love is perfect and human love is flawed, and how we should love, and... a whole big thing, you know?

And later on when I realized I had to stop being Christian, there was this problem of love again:

That there is no more pure or unconditional love in the universe, and that turning away from God and Jesus meant that I would never experience unconditional love ever again. That there was no other being or force in the universe that would want to protect me and cherish me as much as God did.

Well. Imagine the stress. I was someone out there who knew my toes were in a stream, but what a lonely stream it was. And it took me a while to figure it out, which is:

Witchcraft - the kind I practice, at least - is all about love. It's about the love of finding your Family, and living as an active member of that family.

Figuring this out was wonderfully healing to me, because all of the sudden a big piece of that Christianity thing started to make a lot of sense.

Sure, God is love. But to me, he's a specific kind of love. His kind of love isn't home to me. And when you go out there and start touching all these spirits, and pagan gods, and powers in ourselves and in nature, I think you might come to the same conclusions I did:

Love abounds. Pure, true, unconditional love is as common as water. It fills the sky like clouds, like vapor, like rain. Unconditional love, true benevolence, and deep spiritual acceptance infuse the world. The world around us is overflowing with it.

The problem is, not each of us are kin with the same spiritual families. The rainforest pond that nurtures my damp frog skin may be suffocating to you, if you're a jackrabbit. If you're a jackrabbit, you've got to get yourself over to a nice chaparral zone. The good Christian God is an ancient oak tree, and the perfect home to many.

But jackrabbits don't live in oak trees. Neither do rainforest frogs. Sometimes I seek out the shelter of his shade (depending on the angle of the sun), and I know exactly where to go if only an acorn will do.

I'm a spiritual critter. I have spiritual needs. And spirit work and witchcraft can just be fucking around with the otherworld to do sorcery, sure. I don't even mean that in a derogatory way - sorcery is great, and doesn't have to be deeply spiritual, or whatever.

But spirit work and witchcraft is also finding where you belong, and learning how to be an active member of your personal spiritual microbiome. And we all deserve that. We all deserve a chance to live spiritually with our true spiritual families, in our natural spiritual environments.

The oak tree doesn't judge the rabbit for living in a burrow. From time to time the birds get confused about the situation, but that's quite alright.

Lots of room to hide from birds in burrows.

You can mess around with sorcery, if that's all that interests you. But if you're someone who senses, or dares to hope, that Home is still out there somewhere -

What deviancy can there be in trying to find it?

[queenie-blackthorn]

kill yourself

tried n failed like almost exactly three months ago so yk youre late to the party 👍🎉😘

[steamcaptain]

you sound like my ex friends. If you can’t handle your friends constant venting then you are a horrible friend and if they kill themselves their blood is on your hands I hope you can live with that guilt. Let friends vent to you don’t be selfish.

Nobody owes you endless hours of therapy time just because you get along well. As I said before, friends can absolutely care about and support each other by being there to vent to each other, but “constant venting” is unhealthy and damaging. It takes a toll on the other person, especially if they are in a bad place themselves and may not have much capacity for additional negative things. It could be triggering, and that’s not fair to the person listening. Also, venting everything to everyone is dangerous, as someone could use sensitive information against you.

Having boundaries is not selfish. The healthiest thing to do is to ask your friends if they have the capacity for you to vent to them at that moment. If they say yes, that’s great. Go ahead. If they say no, or if later they need to stop, then you need to respect their boundaries. And, of course, your friends should extend the same respect to you. You will lose friends if you continue to overstep lines and overwhelm them with constant negativity, especially if they feel like you’ve trapped them and they can’t ask you to stop. It’s about consent.

If someone is suicidal, and they are in immediate danger, then they are in need of professional help. Friends with limited knowledge in mental health and crisis prevention can only do so much. And if they happen to be suicidal themselves, it could be triggering enough that we might end up with an additional preventable death. Even if they are not, suicide is a very serious and very heavy topic and it needs to be handled by those who are trained for it.

What happens if the untrained friend is unsuccessful in trying to help the other stay alive? Is their blood still on their hands? That is an incredible amount of responsibility that one should reserve for those who can handle it properly. Referring your friend to a professional can save their life.

• If perhaps you mean venting about this in addition to professional help (meaning once they are out of immediate danger), if your friend has the capacity for you to vent about this to, then again, that’s great. Go ahead.

-One time a friend was talking about their suicidal thoughts during a time when I was also suicidal. I tried so hard not to stop them, but it was so triggering I nearly had a panic attack and a meltdown. How exactly was I supposed to help them in that state?

-One time someone who was an acquaintance at best tried dumping some vents on me because they thought I had the same mental health diagnosis they did (I didn’t). I was in an extremely dark place and told them I was sorry and I couldn’t handle it, and they blocked me. We’d barely spoken.

Supporting the idea that people (neurodivergent or not) have the right to spread constant, potentially-triggering negativity to their friends just because they think they owe them is toxic behavior, and I suggest everyone backing this speak to a therapist about it. Especially if you’re threatening your friends with suicide.

[manonamora-if]

i dont know if u feel up for it to answer but like... how do u handle negative comments and ratings and just people being negative about ur stuff? bc i have someone just being rude in comments or like notes and game folders on itch and its making me want to just delete everything and never show anyone anything anymore. or even have an acocunt on itch either.

Hi Anon,

I'm sorry you've been dealing with this, and that it took me so long to answer. I've been thinking about this for a while honestly. I've been writing a bunch of drafts for this one, because my answer seems to change with the day or my mood. Some of my stuff have had some strange interactions lately that's made me question whether I should stay on itch myself. I mean, I don't think I'll ever leave... there are too many fun jams I want to participate and, you know, to force people to play my weird stuff. But I've been more anxious about new stuff or updates I share recently.

I don't blame you for wanting an out. Some users will poison one's experience of a platform, that even opening the site would give them anxiety. It doesn't take much to have events or projects soured. Often, just a few rude words is enough to make accounts disappear without a word. And many platform don't have good safety nets (blocking, moderation, reports) to temper or avoid these situations. Many will have half-ass solutions that, at the end of the day, still allows interactions from blocked users. It's easy to wonder if all of this is worth it...

Anyway, the very boring and short answer to your question: it depends.

The probably as boring and long one is a bit of a ramble:

It depends on the day, or the mood I have. It's easier to deal with comments when I'm confident and things are going find; but I'd feel more hurt or have a harder time dealing with them when I'm a bit more morose (I think most people feel this way). I'll disregard any (even barely) negative points some days, only to take it into consideration a few days later. <- this especially during jam/comps time, just need time to digest criticism of any kind.

It also depends on the content of the comment, their tone, and intent of the commenter. Not all negative comments are on the same level. I've had negative comments in the past where the commenter was genuine, and really gave my stuff a shot, bringing interesting points or important concerns. And though it hurt a bit, because being told you made a mistake sucks, those helped me grow. But those are the good kinds of comments...

On the other hand, I try to disregard the trolls, and the abusive comments (towards my work or me), the ones where the engagement was clearly not done in good faith... you know, the ones who will literally tell me I've made the world worse by uploading my games on itch. Doesn't mean that it doesn't affect me at all*. Some of them really hurt or made me angry and frustrated, some have lingered for hours or days in my mind, a few made me close to delete stuff as well. Words are not just empty things without meaning... *I've had to block a few people both here and other places recently because of it, they had become so insistent on wanting to engage with me while bashing most of my work, my values or the few aspects of my identity that I've shared online.

It would be easy to say I just don't give them the time of day or any of my energy, or that I pretend they don't exist, because, if I do, then the trolls win. But that would be lying. Obviously.

Screaming to the void/a pillow or ranting to friends have helped get rid of my anger and frustration. I've laughed with others about some comments I got (usually the bad faith ones, some of them are funny in how sad/bad they were). I think what worked best for me was just turn off the computer and go outside for a bit. Or turned off the internet and play silly games on my phone. Or picked up a book. Or watch a movie. Essentially, any activity that would distract me from it and force me to take a break. And when none of this worked, because some trolls are just that insistent, blocking/deleting stuff*. *unfortunately, it's not always possible, see second paragraph again.

It does suck that you're kinda forced to grow a thicker skin to enjoy or even exist in those spaces, and I wish those would be friendlier... but I don't think social platforms/the internet is going in that direction anytime soon.

Maybe not super helpful to your decision, but borogove.io hosts IF games (without ratings or comments, though people can download the files), so does the IFDB through the IFArchive (but there are ratings/reviews there, also can be downloadable). I've seen other peeps host their stuff on neocities (no ratings/comments). None of those platforms are like itch, in the positives or the negative. Or just be old school, and email stuff.

[giggly-squiggily]

Hi squiggly! I hope it’s ok that I’m asking this, but I’m in a bit of an artistic slump lately. An itch to create, but no ideas. I was just wondering if you had any fun suggestions! No pressure of course, I just figured why not ask. Have a great day! -⚡️

Hey friend! It's not a problem at all you're asking this- though I don't know if I'd be much help in art ideas hehe 😅

Let's see:

Art trends and memes are fun! The color wheel art challenge, The six characters fanart challenge, any one of those draw the squad memes can be really fun and challenging! (and of course there are tons out there to check out!)

Another idea is to try drawing your favorite characters/OCs in different art styles! Like- if you tend to draw more humanesque, why not turn someone into an animal crossing character or super cartoony? Or if you draw more loose and shapely, why not try drawing the opposite of that?

There are also other mediums to try! If you're used to playing around with colored pencils and such, maybe try markers or paints or even digital? You could also do collages of art in your sketchbook too- glueing things in and creating a sort of layered look to whatever artwork you're working on :)

Finally- I'd recommend checking out one of those art prompt lists or generators that give you a word or scenario that you have to expand on. They can be pretty fun to use- and you'd be surprised on what you might make with them!

Those are just a few thoughts; if anyone wants to add their own ideas, please feel free to do so! I hope this helped!

[bloggingboutburgers]

Hi! Just wanted to drop by and say that I love your art style and your comics. Still trying to figure out the whole aroace thing for myself so seeing you share your experiences like that really helps and makes my heart warm <3

Hiya! Thank you so much for reaching out, this is such a lovely message to come back to <3 I wish you the best in your journey figuring out aroace identity and whatnot! I'm super glad if sharing my experiences can help, honestly I'm pleasantly surprised they can be relatable at all hehe^^ Though I'd also like to say, the aroace spectrum is pretty vast, and there's a myriads of identities and personal experiences within that spectrum, so what I'm drawing here is definitely strictly my personal experience and I don't mean to speak for everyone! What I mean is, if what I'm drawing can resonate with you, that's super awesome and I'm very grateful, but if it doesn't always, that works too! You do you, everyone on these spectrums is their own person with their own experiences, and everyone on these spectrums is free to call the shots on who they are, how they label themselves, and how they feel about this and that. This much I know.

huijkgnfdjkgfd I hope that makes sense- Either way yeah, thank you so much!!^^

[maehemthemisfit]

mae my favourite person on this whole planet who should have definitely burnt the house down by now !! aaah sometimes i don’t even know where to start? you’ve done a lot for me recently even if you didn’t intend to. i was going through such a rough patch and i was losing all my strength and wasn’t sure if i wanted to keep going. you was one of the very few people who actually checked in on me and showed concern. you listened to me and then proceeded to let me fangirl about the auroras and even after that conversation i cried happy tears because it felt so good to have someone listen to me the way you did - so thank you, especially for checking on me. i think if you hadn’t things would be very different right now.

and also my favourite detective from the dango anon evidence board !! you are so unbelievably funny and smart, i’m also head over heels for your writing, whenever i see it on my dash i just want to eat and consume it <3 you made me feel seen regarding a previous situation when i thought that i would look like a bitch when i confided in you about it and if it wasn’t for you and aly i think i’d still be in that situation today and making myself miserable.

i hope you had a fantastic birthday, little sis but your house does terrify me - 💙

STORMIKFRDMME OFFICALLY CRYING RN JMDNMRUJ YALL I- THIS- EURUFRJDEKM I just wanna hug alll of you and never let go

EUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[gentil-minou]

(Same anon who talked about having a Jewish friend)

Actually, I've already seen a bunch of the video explanations and looked things up before sending the last ask in, and yeah, I'm pretty convinced the Palestinians got a raw deal. It looks like the British came in, took over Palestine, then decided to kill two birds with one stone and try to move all the Jews out of their country and into the area they were trying to establish as Israel, while intimidating or outright forcing Palestinians into leaving their own homes in order to make room.

And then after repelling the attack from all the surrounding countries trying to get rid of Israel (which yeah, that uh. That would also have led to a massive tragedy), Israel took over a bunch of territory beyond what they'd been assigned (without any Palestinian input whatsoever), and claimed it as spoils of war or something. And it's occupied areas even beyond that, and regularly bombed Gaza like. A Lot.

Honestly, my biggest source of difficulty is that, well. I DO know people who are Jewish and have family in Israel, and are pro-Israel and arguing all the usual Israeli talking points, and are scared right now. And I can't really say that they shouldn't be afraid for themselves and their friends and family either, even though from what I've seen with my research, Palestinians seem to have been dealt a rawer hand. I'm not sure what to say to them, except generally adopting one of the more neutral stances that focuses on the horrors this conflict has inflicted on everyone involved, like what Rick Riordan said in a recent blog post.

I am also quite aware that when anyone, myself included, tries to speak about this issue, the reader is waiting to pounce, thinking, “Yes, but whose side are you on?” That is exactly the wrong question. If there are two sides to this issue, those sides are not Palestinian/Israeli or Muslim/Jewish. The two sides are humanitarian and dehumanizing. Dehumanizing has a long evil history. It is appealing and easy to buy into, because humans are tribal animals. We are hardwired to think in terms of ‘us’ versus ‘them.’  We are the real humans, the good guys, the ones with God on our side. Those other people are evil monsters who don’t deserve empathy. Hate mongers have thrived on dehumanizing for as long as there have been humans. It provides them with a purpose, a way to rally support, power, and scapegoats. It is  easy to point to atrocities committed by our enemies, while justifying or minimizing the atrocities committed by ourselves or our allies.

Humanitarianism is a much harder sell. It requires us to empathize, to see other groups of people as equally deserving of dignity and quality of life. It requires not always putting ourselves and our needs first. But in the long run, humanitarianism is our only hope. If violence could end violence, if we could put an end to “those other people” once and for all, human history would read very differently than it does.

So yes, I am appalled by the Hamas attacks on Israeli civilians. I am appalled by the suffering of Palestinian civilians in Gaza. Both things can be true. Both things must be true. My thoughts are with all the people who have died, who have lost loved ones, who have had their worlds and their lives shattered, especially the children. More death and violence will not break this cycle, which has been going on for generations. There is no military solution. Even since I first wrote the post, only twenty-four hours ago, the Israeli government’s brutal retaliation against the entire population of Gaza has reached genocidal proportions. This is not only an atrocity. It is folly. Answering misery with misery only creates more fertile ground for extremism, dehumanizing the “other side,” letting hate mongers thrive, stay in power, and reduce us all to our most monstrous impulses. The only real solution is treating each other like equally worthy human beings, and negotiating a peace that allows all parties a chance to live in security and dignity, with hopes for a future that does not include bombs and rockets and gunfire. This means security and support for Israel, yes. It also means a secure Palestine which is allowed to get the international aid and recognition it needs to build a viable state.

Do I think that will happen? Unfortunately, no. Humans are simply too selfish, too ready to blame “the other” for all their problems, too ready to dehumanize, though I also believe, perhaps paradoxically, that most people just want to live their lives in peace and have a chance for their children to have a brighter future. The problem is when we don’t allow other people to have those same hopes and dreams — when it becomes a false choice of us versus them.

What can I do? I will continue to write books that I hope will give young readers some joy. I will resist the urge to demonize entire groups of people. I will call for less violence, not more violence. And when asked whose side I am on, I will tell you I am on the side of humanitarianism.

I'm not sure whether you have a better stance to take when it comes to talking to friends who have close ties to the Israeli side of this conflict, who are afraid for themselves and their family. Because I can't say they're wrong to be afraid and upset, but also there needs to be recognition of what Palestinians have gone through as well. I'm not sure whether you have Jewish friends who support Israel who you've talked about this with, but if you do, how do you handle that?

To be frank, I wish I had the answers for your question but I don't right now. The majority of people in my life are either Pro-Palestine or refuse to talk about the situation saying it's too stressful, which is its own frustration and which I push back on by still talking about it.

The people in my life that are Pro-Israel are at work, which is difficult considering the ethics in this situation are all over the place. How do I support an Israeli client calling for the genocide of an entire race? How do I, as their therapist, validate something that I find so morally repugnant I feel sick to my stomach before every session. How do I deal with working at an organization devoted to helping kids with their mental health when right now one of the most traumatic incidences the world has ever seen is happening right this second?

My workplace has apparently chosen silence and not talking about any of this as its strategy, and I don't know how to navigate it. Do I leave my job and the kids I work with to uphold my morals? Do I stay to help the kids I wanted to support even though they support something I fine reprehensible? Do I ignore it like my workplace does and stay for the kids I can help, where I comparmentalize everything thats been happening so I can help them even though their problems are so small? Do I stay even though every second of silence and refusal to recognize the very real genocide happening right now kills me every single day? I haven't worked it out yet. I don't know how to balance psychology ethics with my own ethics, and I think that's it's own issue.

So I don't have the answers here. I'm much better talking about these things online than I am in person. I have a better reach online than I do in person, which is why I do it so much here. If I had to confront a Pro-Israeli family/friend I know myself and I know I would cry and get angry and I don't know what I would do after that.

So for that, I'd say you're doing better than I am Anon.

Something I have considered though is where do I draw the line for what makes someone a friend or person I want to keep in my life.

And to me, a South Asian woman with an Arabic name from a Muslim family who grew up under the shadow of Post-9/11 Islamophobia in NYC and has devoted her life to working with kids who have trauma, depression, and anxiety, I think I am justified in taking it personally and with great offence if someone is saying the genocide of people I relate to heavily is okay. I think I as a person as a human being can draw the line when I need to.

And I think what gets me is I will talk about it. I refuse to stop.

[ardenrosegarden]

What was Bertha de Cornouaille's second marriage like? From what I can tell her first marriage doesn't seem to have been very good (although she outlived him, slay!) but im a bit confused about her second

Lmao yeah, slay indeed, get that Honour of Richmond 💪💯 At the end of the day I have to respect the grind even if it sounds like her time in England was a bit rough :')

As for Bertha's second marriage, that also seems to be quite murky, she was rarely (from what I can tell) acting very independently (the only known charter we have of hers is from her time in England), so it's hard to get a clear picture from the little information we have how she may have felt about Eudon.

On one hand, it could have been a pretty politically advantageous marriage- Porhoët was pretty expansive, which is kind of important if you're concerned about a potential power vacuum destabilizing your family. Unfortunately that call kind of came from inside the house.

I've seen some writers claim that when Eudon and Conan IV fell out, she took Eudon's side and others claim the opposite, so it's hard to get an idea of where she would have been in all of this. I tend to lean more to the latter opinion, given the commentary from Judith Everard and Sara McDougall which suggest that Conan III's decision to make Bertha his heir instead of her brother was a cooperative family effort to increase their family's influence, which to me colors how she may have seen Eudon's grab for power.

On the other hand, Eudon was claiming Brittany in the name of the daughter he had with Bertha (Alix), so I can also understand on there being some messiness for Bertha on a personal level if she felt she had to choose between her daughter and son's livelihood.

[roselise]

Do you have an OF

Hello, and a wonderful day to you! ♡

No, I do not. c:

I do have lots of soft and kind things on my blog, however, and I truly hope that some of it might brighten your day all the same though!

Sending many warm thoughts, and well-wishes for you! ♡ ♡

I pray that you take care, and stay safe, friend ~ ! XO

🤍 ✿ * ⊹ ·̩͙ ♡ 🧸🧁

[apollos-boyfriend]

I'm honestly kinda scared to start watching mianite cause associative memories with a bad person but I do really want to get into it so any advice?

i’m not the best at this but here’s what i got!! if anyone has anything to add, feel free!

take your time. don’t force yourself into more than you can handle, and there’s absolutely no shame in taking breaks or stopping for as long as you need to to recuperate.

you don’t have to watch everything! in season 1 especially, shorter episodes can be skipped and the story will basically remain the same. important lore tends to go on in the longer episodes, with the shorter ones being either extremely lore-light or having none at all, and just consisting of the ccs goofing off

even then, you don’t even have to watch everything, either. i know people that only ever watched season 1, or people that only watched season 2, or dropped off somewhere along the line. all are valid experiences! don’t push yourself to more than you’re comfortable with, and if that comfort level only happens to be a certain season/part, that’s completely okay!

i’m not sure if this would help necessarily, but if it’s any easier, there’s also recaps [link] on individual days/episodes, as well as the main story in general.

[rosicheeks]

I think (unless tumblr has changed) you can block anons and then it'll pop up in your blocked people's list and you should be able to see who sent it. Atleast that's how it went a while ago.

Yeah I’m pretty sure that’s how it was awhile ago but I have no clue if it’s still like that.