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maxwell-grant · 3 years

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Would you consider Hugo Strange a pulp villain?

Yes. And I would argue that he didn't really stop being one even after his revival.

"Professor Hugo Strange, the most dangerous man in the world! Scientist, philosopher and a criminal genius - little is known of him, yet this man is undoubtly the greatest organizer of crime in the world! - Bruce Wayne, Detective Comics #36

Hugo Strange was created with the intention of being Batman's arch-enemy right from the start, introduced as such by Bruce when he figures out he's responsible for the G-man assassination, pretty explicitly intended to be Batman's Moriarty and with even an equivalent demise. He was big enough to tower over his henchmen and fistfight Batman, he had a uniquely deformed skull, he was both a charismatic but threatening crimelord as well as a mad scientist plotting to TAKE OVER THE WORLD, and I've heard before the argument that the Monster Men were taken from a Doc Savage novel released earlier the same year called The World's Fair Goblin that revolves around a giant mutated man doing crimes under command by the story's villain

That poor devil, Maximus, was a Fair visitor himself, once. He was given injections of thyroxine and adrenalin—and changed rapidly into a pituitary giant. But, in the experiment, his will power was destroyed. Now he only follows the directions of that masked devil who has him hypnotized

He said, "The Man of Tomorrow stuff was merely publicity to draw the Fair crowds—and a shield to cover your own experiments. But the masked surgeon cashed in on it. Obviously he is mad enough to really believe a superman can be created." - The World's Fair Goblin

(Considering Lester Dent had taken potshots at Superman explicitly in "Whisker of Hercules", it's not unlikely that this is an explicit reference)

Although there's really no overlap in the stories besides that, as The World's Fair Goblin only had one giant where as Hugo mutated a couple dozen mentally ill patients to create monsters and then used them to go on mass murdering rampages, because Batman has always been over-the-top. But, yeah, original form Hugo was a pretty cut and dry pulp villain, like most of Batman's villains who debuted prior to 1940. Which is part of why he only had about 3 appearences before they killed him off.

By this point, Batman was in the process of moving away from his pulp knock-off origins into more of his own character, with the introduction of Robin and Dick Tracy cartoon villains that would set the tone for the rest of Batman in the Golden Age, and with the debut of Joker and Catwoman in Batman #1, Hugo was already obsolete as an arch-enemy, and was killed off the following appearence.

Of course, if you know Hugo Strange, you likely already know this, and that he was then revived in the 70s by Marshall Rogers with a brilliant take that stuck to the character's origins as a brilliant crimelord and scientific genius, but also added to him a specifically twisted psychological bent of being obsessed with Batman and becoming Batman, a villain of unshakeable will and even a twisted sense of honor and ethics, refusing to divulge Batman's secret identity even while beaten to death.

And from that moment onwards Hugo would go on to have some of the most consistently brilliant appearences out of any Batman villain (at least until the 2010s) and would secure himself as a mainstay, albeit a very obscure one, figure of Batman, the kind of villain whose plots can range from Born Again-esque subtle destructions of a person's life to a rampage of mutant kaijus on downtown Gotham, and like many of the best Batman villains, it all comes back to a central obsession and psychological edge upon Batman, and the weaponizing and destruction of anything that stands in his way.

You could argue Hugo Strange used to be a cut and dry pulp villain who was eventually reimagined as a Batman Villain, and it would even be somewhat fitting of his in-universe trajectory as a man who started out a career as a figure of prestige and respect, effortlessly able to blend in society, until his repeated encounters with Batman and, most importantly, his gradually increasing obsession with becoming Batman, gradually destroyed him until he's no longer the one ruling the madhouse, but instead trapped in it.

But the reason why I'd argue Hugo Strange is still a Pulp Villain is because his reinventions didn't shed away what he used to be, they merely returned him to his true origins. Because Hugo, you see, is not just a Mad Scientist or Mad Psychologist, Batman's got those by the dozens. Hugo is of a particularly nasty kind of Pulp Villain, who came to existence around the same time as the Mad Scientist if not slightly earlier, an archetype Jess Nevins has named The Evil Surgeon

Medicine has arguably thrown up more serial killers than all the other professions put together, with nursing a close second - Herbert Kinnel, former chairman of the British Medical Association

The Evil Surgeon came to existence as a pop culture archetype in the late 19th century, as the result of serial killers like Jack the Ripper and H.H Holmes making the news, with Doctor Quartz from Nick Carter being first and foremost among these, as the main arch-enemy of the most published character worldwide at the time.

He would be followed years later by H.G Wells's Doctor Moreau, and the likes of Dr Caresco and Professor Tornada, the stars of novels created by André Couvreur, who was himself a medical doctor and used these novels to both condemn the characters as well as give serious consideration to the ideas they explored, and depicted Dr Caresco's over-the-top exploits harkening back to stories about Marquis de Sade (the origin of the term "sadist"). These would be followed by characters like Grigorii Trirodov, Dr Cornelius Kramm, Dr Gogol from Mad Love, currently the most famous example of this seems to be Hannibal Lecter. And Hugo has been operating much more along the lines of those characters in the last decades, than the typical mad scientists he was once designed in reference to.

Of course there's a massive overlap between the two and room to dispute whether they even constitute separate archetypes, they practically came to existence together following the footsteps of Victor Frankenstein, who really isn't a true example of a Mad Scientist in the original novel, and wasn't even a real doctor, but Frankenstein's reputation undeniably is the oldest cultural touchstone we can point to as an influence in the archetype, even if said archetype would only truly take form in pulp magazines and serials.

What I'd argue defines the Evil Surgeon as an archetype specifically, is that they are specifically centered around the violation and destruction of the human body and function more as murderers with budgets, than supervillains in labcoats. Mad Scientists are generally more centered around plots closer to sci-fi/fantasy inventions like sentient robots and immortality potions used for large scale global domination, where as Evil Surgeons are more preoccupied with wielding psychology and torture and criminal resources to get away with destroying minds on more individual scales, or turning cities into slaughterhouses for them to work in.

They aren't quite full blown slasher villains, like Zsasz or Professor Pyg, instead they usually tend to be quite good at passing off as respectable, mentally sound figures of moral standing, and usually possess a sense of purpose towards their work, a goal they are working for by piling corpses atop each other and moving resources to achieve, even if said goal is a purely selfish fulfillment of their own desires. It's quite common for these characters to acquire large bases for them to operate in, even islands specifically.

In Caresco Surhomme, Caresco has taken control of the Pacific island of Eucrasia. Caresco applies his surgical methods to the inhabitants of the island, altering them to better do their jobs. The captain of the plane which brings outsiders to Eucrasia is a limbless trunk with telescopic vision. Even the island itself is in the shape of a human body. The natives of Eucrasia are addicted to various sensual pleasures and generally submit to Caresco’s rule, for fear that he will castrate them or worse.

On Eucrasia, Caresco makes use of “omnium,” a mysterious and unexplained power source, to create: a machine capable of stripping the years from human bodies and reversing the aging process, a fast underground train system, food pills, omnium-powered diving suits, and so on. Caresco is given to such things as collecting the spleens of all those he operates on - Jess Nevins, The Encyclopedia of Pulp Heroes

So, yes, I absolutely would argue Hugo Strange is still a Pulp Villain. Pulp villains do come in many different forms other than the Fu Manchus and Fantomases that are most commonly imitated, pulp was the breeding ground of the supervillain as a concept after all, where they got to star in their own magazines time and time again. Hugo started off as a fairly generic one, and when he's written poorly, he tends to be brought onboard of a story purely because it calls for a mad scientist.

But Strange came back from death as something much, much worse than just a crimelord and mad scientist, a much more rare and much nastier type of villain that, much like Hugo himself, may lie dormant, but refuses to stay dead for long.

"Quincy. My servant. My friend," Hugo said. "We don't have much time."

Quincy was crying again, with joy. "How, master, how did you-?"

The therapy, Quincy realized. The hypnosis. The drugs.

"Stay with me master, please!" Quincy tried to grab hold a phantom hand.

"I cannot." Strange said, looking benevolently down at Quincy, stroking his hair with a touch the prisoner couldn't feel. "But there is one last service you can perform me."

"Anything, Hugo, please."

"First, remove the sheet from your bed, Quincy. And tie it to the light-fixture on the ceiling."

#replies tag #batman #dc comics #hugo strange #dr jack quartz #pulp villains

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inevitably-johnlocked · 4 years

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Do you know any good movie aus? Not as in they're actors, but fics written based on movie plots?

Hey Nonny!!

OHHHH! This is fantastic! Because I actually have ANOTHER ask looking for crossovers too, and the list is HUGE. So I’ve used this opportunity to split the list up into two. This one here is for my MFL list, and if anyone has any of their own to suggest, please add them to this list!

So, check out Below!

CROSSOVERS and FUSIONS (Feb 2021) Pt. 1.5 [FICS TO READ]

See Also:

Fairy Tales and Fantasy

TV, Movies, and Books AU (Fantasy Pt. 2)

Wonderful Life AU

Sherlock / Hannibal Crossovers?

Science Fiction / Fantasy

Faes / Faeries

Disney-esque Fics

Moulin Rouge AU

Crossovers and Fusions Pt 1

Two More Miracles by PatPrecieux (T, 221 w., 1 Ch. || Good Omens Crossover || Angst With Happy Ending, 221B Ficlet, Temporary Character Death) – Tragedy and miracles go hand in hand.

Here, Though the World Explode, These Two Survive by TheTyger (G, 1,194 w., 2 Ch. || Good Omens Crossover || Post-TRF, Ineffable Husbands, Fluff, Reunion, Rings, Hurt/Comfort) – Tomorrow, it would be three years from that day. Three years with no rude text messages, no experiments being conducted while London slept, no body parts in the fridge. And John still sometimes caught himself buying extra milk and looking for cases and making two coffees.

Just the Book by Carenejeans (G, 1,495 w., 1 Ch. || Good Omens Crossover || Humour, Aziraphale’s Bookshop) – John's looking for a book. It's Aziraphale's bookshop, but Crowley provides customer service.

The Case of the Missing.... by Beth H (G, 2,601 w., 1 Ch. || Sherlock Crossover || Case Fic) – Crowley has gone missing, and Aziraphale hasn't a clue how to go about finding him. Luckily, help comes from above...or rather, from the side.

The Curious Case of the Missing Antichrist by Aedemiel (G, 2,865 w., 1 Ch. || Sherlock Crossover || Vignette, Case Fic, Desperation, Bad Ideas) – What if Aziraphale and Crowley had consulted the great consulting detective, Sherlock Holmes, about finding Adam Young?

Eye of the Storm by Calais_Reno (G, 2,996 w., 1 Ch. || The Day After Tomorrow AU || Survival, Cold Weather, Boy Scout John, No Major Character Death) – Weather has become the fifth horseman of the apocalypse.

Nice and Accurate Deductions by htebazytook (T, 3,179 w., 1 Ch. || Good Omens Crossover || Romance, Humour, Fluff) – Sherlock drags John to a certain bookshop in Soho.

Snake In The Flat by PatPrecieux (T, 3,293 w., 1 Ch. || Good Omens Crossover || Magical Realism, Fluff, Humour, Ineffable Husbands) – There can be a snake in the grass, snakes on a plane and now there's a snake in the flat.

The Picture of Sherlock Holmes by CarmillaCarmine (M, 3,306 w., 1 Ch. || Victorian Dorian Gray AU || Angst, Paris, London, Travel, Painting, Major Character Death, Opera, Captain John, First Meetings) – Sherlock Holmes, a rich and frivolous man, after a lifetime of debauchery finally falls in love. His heart chooses Captain Watson.

The Old Town by a_different_equation (T, 3,573 w., 1 Ch. || Hans Christian Anderson Fusion || Magical Realism, Christmas, Fairy Tale Elements, Love Stories, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Museums, Sweet Sherlock) – Once upon a time there were two boys. This is the story how once upon December, they found the missing Christmas Spirit, true love and new beginnings. A Queer fairytale for all seasons.

Holmes vs. Harkness by coinin (T, 3,960 w., 1 Ch. || Torchwood / HHGTTG Fusion || Crack, Mystrade) – In which Captain Jack gets in a little over his head and is introduced to the myriad joys of bureaucracy, Mycroft is smug, the Guide offers up some helpful advice, John Watson doesn't share, and, in a strange turn of events, Jack doesn't get laid even once.

Perfect by TrufflesTheMushroom (T, 3,984 w., 1 Ch. || Good Omens Crossover || The Apocalypse) – Crowley and Aziraphale have made a huge mistake. It's the end of the world and it all boils down to one fight. Crowley has picked John Watson. Aziraphale has picked Sherlock Holmes.

Limbo by Calais_Reno (T, 4,070 w., 1 Ch. || Good Omens Crossover || Waiting Rooms, Ineffable Bureaucracy, Paperwork, Explosions, Apocalypse, Second Chances, Declarations of Love, Nobody Dies) – Ordinarily Sherlock would be quite impatient by now with all this pointless waiting (for what?), but at the moment he feels as if he has all the time in the world.

The Baker Street Flat by Anonymous (PG-13, 5,000-20,000 w., 7 Parts || Lake House Crossover || Angst, Romance, LIVEJOURNAL Comments Fic) – John’s pretty sure it’s a sign of mental imbalance — of which he has been all too frequently accused of late — that he is actually entertaining the possibility that he is communicating with a total stranger two years in the future via the magic mail slot on the door of his new flat. He certainly won’t be mentioning this at next week’s session. On his way out the door to interview for a part-time position at a local surgery, another meeting where he has no intention of mentioning his most recent hobby, he drops a fairly sarcastic note: If you’re really from 2012, is the world about to end?

In the Shadows by Laur (M, 5,029 w., 1 Ch. || Loose Shutter Island Fusion || Disturbing Imagery, Psychological, Angst, Major Character Death, Grief/Trauma) – Do you believe in ghosts? When Sherlock’s eyes snap to him they are anguished.

come be my april fool by a_different_equation (M, 6,473 w., 1 Ch. || Great British Bake Off AU || Writer!Sherlock, Est. Rel., Fluff / Humour, Baking, Marriage Proposal, Military Kink, Domestics, POV John, Romance, Sherlock Wears Glasses, Sweet Sherlock, Bookstores, Queer Themes) – After leaving ��The Great British Bake Off’, Sue Perkins has written a book about Victorian baking. Tonight, on April 1st, she is reading at ‘The Bard’, Mike Stamford’s bookstore in central London. It is the exact same spot where John Watson, battered and bruised, had learned all about his magnificent bastard – one Mr. Sherlock Holmes, famous gay crime fiction writer – for the first time. A story about found family, DRAMAtical lesbians, how to react when your boyfriend has a military kink but he doesn't want to act on it, oh, and popping the question. Sequel to 'i read your book, you magnificent bastard'. Part 2 of Magnificent Bastard!AU

The Babadook by CatieBrie (T, 6,886 w., 1 Ch. || Babadook Fusion || Post-TRF, Horror, Demonic Possession, Violence, Halloween, Grief, Angst with Happy Ending) – “A children’s book,” John mutters as he flips it open. The pages are scrawled with beautiful charcoal lines and thick black ink. The cover, bright red, edges the open pages and something tugs at the back of John’s brain. It’s a familiar feeling, black and tarrish and thick in his thoughts. He shakes it off and picks the book up off his bed, turning so that he can sit on the edge and spread the book out across his knees. If it’s in a word or it’s in a look, you can’t get rid of the Babadook. He turns the page, ignoring the pressure building beneath his chest. There’s a closet on one page; paper doors meant to be opened by the reader flutter as John reads the text on the other page.

What To Do With An Atypical Animal Within by HarveyDangerfield & swimsalot (E, 7,804 w. || Harry Potter AU || Animagus, Porn With A Little Plot, Tail Porn) – Sherlock is determined to be an animagus. But what happens when it isn't a fox or a horse or a dog he's turning into?

The Lonely by elwinglyre (E, 7,888 w., 1 Ch. || Twilight Zone AU || Major Character Death, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Firsts, Sad Ending) – Witness if you will a distant planet with a dungeon made of desert sand and mountain stone. This planet holds one inmate, a man wrongly accused, serving a life sentence. His only solace, his notebook and the thought of the day when the supply ship brings him a pardon. Instead, salvation comes to John Watson in a large box and a visitor from The Twilight Zone.

Friend by esama (G, 7,909 w., 1 Ch. || Harry Potter Crossover || Character Death, Kid Fic) – Sherlock finds the skull when he's five.

Spell It Out by prettysailorsoldier (M, 8,344 w., 1 Ch. || Harry Potter Fusion || Teenlock, Christmas, Love Potion/Spell, Pining Sherlock) – Remaining at Hogwarts over break has become something of a tradition for Sherlock and John, staying behind together ever since their very first year, but, when Irene throws a gift of doctored coconut ice into the mix, plans quickly change, even if John doesn't. Part 6 of 25 Days of Johnlock

The Long Goodbye by elbereth (M, 8,367 w., 1 Ch. || Time Traveller’s Wife AU || Doomed Timelines, Time Travel) – Sherlock travels in time. The ending is known even before they meet, yet they choose to live this love. One of them knows the past, one of them knows the future, yet their deepest secret is safe from each other. Limited time, but unlimited love.

Sugar & Spice by Ttime42 (T, 8,476 w., 1 Ch. || Great British Bake Off AU || First Kiss, Baking) – Sherlock Holmes and John Watson compete on The Great British Bake Off.

Pygmalion by ancientreader (T, 9,136 w., 2, Ch. || Pygmalion AU || Magical Realism) – The spell to turn a statue into an animate being has been illegal in the UK for a hundred and seventy years when the -- body? -- is found on Hampstead Heath. It changes everything.

Am I the Current (Tiger) King of England? by Dee_Laundry (T, 9,360 w., 1 Ch. || Tiger King Fusion || Post-S4, Dreams, Friendship, John’s Sexuality, Sherlock’s Sexuality, Quarantine/CoVID-19, Past Character Death, Mentions of Violence, Mentions of Dom/Sub, First Kiss) – “I had the weirdest dream last night,” John said. Seven times.

I Could Try by Arcwin (T, 9,583 w., 5 Ch. || Greek Mythology Crossover || Post-TRF, Orpheus and Eurydice Myth, POV John, Pining John, BAMF John, Depression, Suicidal Thoughts, Horror, Angst with Happy Ending) – John is grieving Sherlock's death post Reichenbach until one day, he sees the violin case, and something inside him tells him to pick it up. Crossover between BBC Sherlock and the Greek tragedy Orpehus and Eurydice, wherein Eurydice is killed for her beauty and taken to the Underworld. Orpheus, being the son of Apollo (the God of Music and Medicine) travels to the Underworld to convince (via playing his lyre) Hades and Persephone to let Eurydice go. Orpheus then must travel with Eurydice behind him, not looking back, until they exit to the land of the living.

Puzzlebox by standbygo (E, 9,867 w., 5 Ch. || Hellraiser Fusion || True Love, Supernatural Elements, Psychological Horror, First Kiss, Post S2, Angst with Happy Ending) – A love story with horror. A horror story with a happy ending.

you are a paradigm by 1electricpirate (M, 10,013 w. || Harry Potter AU || Wizard!John / Muggle!Sherlock, Magic) – Sometimes, only sometimes, when Sherlock is very far away and absolutely guaranteed not to return for at least three hours, John sits on the sofa and lets the tea make itself. In which John is (reluctantly) a wizard, Mycroft is (apparently) omniscient, and Sherlock is (surprisingly) oblivious. Part 1 of More Things Than Are Dreamt Of

Already Gone by johnwatso (M, 10,078 w., 8 Ch. || Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind Fusion || Non-Linear Narrative, Memory Loss, Ambiguous / Open Ending) – Dear Mr Greg Lestrade, Sherlock Holmes has had John Watson erased from his memory. Please never mention their relationship to him again. Thank you, Lacuna Inc.

A Real Deal by toyhto (M, 10,339 w., 1 Ch. || Black Mirror-Inspired || Science Fiction, Post-TRF, Canon Divergence) – Please be real, he thought and pulled Sherlock closer.

You Don't Need Wings to Fly by Laiquilasse (T, 11,326 w., 11 Ch. || Wonderful Life AU || Bullying, Angels, Suicidal Ideation, Christmas) – John, an angel, is sent from Heaven to help a desperate Sherlock Holmes by showing him what life would have been like if he had never existed.

Backup Copies by etothepii (M, 13,332 w., 3 Ch. || Dollhouse Crossover || Major Character Death) – When John dies, Sherlock doesn't know what to do. But Mycroft does.

Silent Night by khorazir (M, 15,060 w., 1 Ch. || Codebreaker / WWII / Imitation Game-Inspired AU || Care Fic, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Dev. Rel., Reunion, PTSD John, Christmas) – It’s Christmas Eve 1944, and Sherlock Holmes has received his most precious gift already: after a long, dangerous deployment, Surgeon Captain John Watson of the Royal Navy has unexpectedly returned from the front. As if this weren’t enough, there’s a case. Both events make for a night full of promise, excitement, and the difficult task of getting reacquainted with the man Sherlock hasn’t seen in three years and feared he’d lost forever. Part 2 of Enigma

In Arduis Fidelis by Raliena (T, 18,628 w., 10 Ch. || GI Joe Crossover || Captivity, Surgery, BAMF John, John “Three Continents” Watson, POV John Watson, Prisoner of War, Cobra - Freeform, soldier John, John-centric, Doctor John Watson, John is a Very Good Doctor, Violence) – Once upon a time John was a Soldier and a Doctor. And he was known John or Doc or Doctor. But things change. And he *earned* his right to the name “Three Continents Watson”. Part 1 of the Three Continents Watson series

Serendipity by Calais_Reno (T, 18,222 w., 3 Ch. || Serendipity Fusion || Christmas, Romance, Coincidences, First Meetings, Misunderstandings, New York City, Fate and Destiny) – A bit of New York Christmas fluff, based on the 2001 movie.

Magnificent by esama (T, 19,477 w., 1 Ch. || Harry Potter Crossover || Crossover Pairing) – The birth of the Ministry of Magic and his relationship with the British Government.

Much Ado About Nothing or Get Over Here and Kiss Me Already! by MorganeUK (NR, 19,847 w., 13 Ch. || Much Ado About Nothing AU || Mutual Pining, Angst, Lestrolly) – AU in modern time where the Holmes' are a powerful noble family, Mycroft is the chief of defences and Sherlock is working for secret service. Lestrade is a high rank officer in the army. Ms Hudson is an old Lady that took care of her niece and nephew Molly and John since their youth. Part 1 of the Sherlock / Shakespeare series

Dead Letter Office by a_different_equation (M, 20,364 w., 15 Ch. || ‘Bartleby’ Fusion / Office Setting AU || Different First Meeting, Epistolary, John's Blog, Angst with a Happy Ending, Pre-Canon, John Watson is Sherlock's Boss, PTSD John, Military Backstory, Writer John, Drug Use, Texting) – John Watson comes home from the war, gets a new job and meets Sherlock Holmes through Mike Stamford. Same tale since 1891, except this time it’s 2008, John is Sherlock’s boss, and they work together at the Dead Letter Office in London. It's not a love story, until it finally is.

When John Met Sherlock by MorganeUK (T, 21,293 w., 10 Ch. || When Harry Met Sally AU || Friendship, Friends to Lovers, Developing Relationship, Faking It, Mutual Pining, Background Lestrolly, Fluff and Smut, Rom-Com) – At first they thought that friendship was impossible. Then meet again and become friends. After dinners, texts, cases and discussions they become more, best friends. Faking orgasm before falling on the floor together to get real one... Then going back to pushing each other away again... Before falling in love!But not necessarily in this order.

You're The One by Mazarin221b (E, 21,768 + w. || WiP || Underage Dirty Dancing Fusion || Period Typical Homophobia, Sexism, Angst, Fluff) – John Watson is seventeen years old and has his life planned out: medical school, a commission, and an opportunity to change the world. He just has to get through three weeks at The Copper Beeches - a resort owned by one of his father's patients - with his annoying sister and his perfect parents before he's off to Cambridge. But John has a secret he's trying desperately to keep, and, it seems, so is just about everyone around him, including the incredibly gorgeous and amazing dance teacher, Sherlock Holmes, and his partner Irene Adler. Too bad Jim Moriarty seems to know precisely what everyone is hiding.

Into the Multiverse by AnAnYaH (M, 21,958 w., 18 Ch. || Avengers / Sherlock / Dr. Strange Crossover || Multiverses, Everstrange, Parentlock / Teenage Rosie, Sad Sherlock, Angry Sherlock, Sherlock/John Fight, Magic, Strange John, First Kiss, Whipping, Graphic Depictions of Violence, Threats of Rape / Non-Con, Mental Anguish, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Heavy Angst with Happy Ending) – Nothing lasts forever. I am beginning to think it's the same for you and me. In a world where we don't co-exist how long will it take to finally break us ? Or are we already broken in need of a fix ?A multi-chapter fic where Sherlock and John had to leave their lives to save the world from universal threats and pursue as Doctor Strange and Everett Ross.Will they ever reunite? Part 1 of the Everstrange series

Addicted to a Certain Lifestyle by KatsatheGraceling (M, 22,751 w., 1 Ch. || James Bond Crossover || Bondlock, BAMF John, Assassin John, Q is a Holmes, Clueless Sherlock, Omniscient Mycroft) – The one where John is a BAMF assassin. With an affinity for cuddly warm jumpers.

Impossible Improbable Truth by KaraRenee (M, 24,308 w., 9 Ch. || Labyrinth AU) – John and Sherlock take a case investigating the disappearance of a teenage girl and her toddler half brother. What they find is an impossible adventure that leads them on a journey of discovery of their sexuality.

The Art Of Seduction: A Study In Pulling by flawedamythyst (M, 25,279 w., 1 Ch. || Queer As Folk Inspired AU || John/OMC, Additional Tags to Be Added Upon Reading) – Sherlock ran a website called The Science Of Seduction, on which he gave advice on the best ways to get laid, wrote blog entries detailing the results of his various sexual 'experiments' and generally contributed to the stereotype of 'every gay man is a sex-mad playboy'. John avoided the thing like the plague. AU in which Sherlock treats sex like he does crime in canon. Inspired by Queer As Folk UK, but it very quickly went its own way. Part 1 of The Art Of Seduction

False Advertising by ravenscar (E, 27,722 w. || Office AU / Devil Wears Prada Inspired || Victor Trevor, Flashbacks, Hurt / Comfort, Angst with Happy Ending, Younger John/Older Sherlock, Marriage Proposal) – Sherlock is John’s boss and mentor at an advertising agency. Can they find love in the cut-throat workplace?

A Wizarding Barista's Field Guide to Seducing a Muggle by paradigmfinch (T, 29,344 w., 9 Ch || Harry Potter Coffee Shop AU || Wizard John, Muggle Sherlock, Bisexual John, Flirting, First Dates, Secret Identity) – To help pay for Healing tuition, John Watson gets a job at a coffee shop in Muggle London, where he soon sets his sights on a particularly gorgeous customer. John's seen plenty of Muggle films. How different can it really be to woo a Muggle?

Time Of My Life by fiveainley_ohmy (E, 29,719 w., 8 Ch. || Dirty Dancing Fusion || Bisexual John, Dancing, Gay/Demi Sherlock) – John Watson takes his alcoholic sister to a summer camp in attempt to rehabilitate her. He didn't expect to fall in love with the dance instructor.

Through Dangers Untold by hogwartswitch (E, 32,003 w., 13 Ch. || Labyrinth AU) – The Goblin King has fallen in love with John Watson and visits him in dreams. But the evil wizard who cursed the Goblin King cannot allow that to continue. Will John survive the labyrinth? Or will he become a lost goblin like all the rest?

Unsettled by AxeMeAboutAxinomancy (E, 33,879 w., 10 Ch. || HIs Dark Materials AU || Daemons, Dark Themes, Non-Con) – Sherlock's dæmon hadn't settled. Once John realised that, so much made sense. Though so much else didn't, because it practically wasn't possible. Part 1 of the The Utmost Edge of Hazard series

The Last Companion by standbygo (E, 34,101 w., 14 Ch. || Firefly Fusion || Prostitution, Case Fic, Falling in Love, Angst with Happy Ending, Slow Burn, BAMF John, Discussions of Non Con But Doesn’t Happen) – Thirty years after the Miranda Wars, there is peace, both on the Rim and the Core planets. There are a number of old social mores still in place, such as the Order of Companions, but there is a sense that even such respected practices are coming to an end… Sherlock is a Companion - the best Companion on Persephone. With a bit of detective work on the side, of course. Then he meets a man named John Watson, encounters a series of bizarre cases, and finds his world is getting turned upside down.

The Great Bakerstreet Bake Off by Elphen (M, 38,058 w., 8 Ch. || Great British Bake Off AU || Caring Sherlock, Sweet John, Fluff, Baking, Accidental Touching, Pining, BJ’s, Banter and Bickering, Oblivious Characters) – John has decided to watch The Great British Bake Off this year and he is determined to do so. As Sherlock joins him, he is certain that that plan is ruined. He's in for a surprise when he's allowed to watch it but the real shock comes when Sherlock decides they ought to bake themselves. What's more, they should bake what they make in the Bake Off. John's not so sure it's a good idea but when his insides flutter at the thought, he finds it hard to complain.

Toe to Toe by standbygo (E, 44,971 w., 26 Ch. || White Nights Crossover || Ballet/Dance, Slow Burn, Spies/Secret Agents, Angst with Happy Ending, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, First Kiss/Time, Shower Sex) – Sherlock Holmes is an international ballet star. After a favour for his brother goes south, he finds himself trapped in a foreign country, with a man named John Watson who could be an enemy... or an ally.

Silence by halloa_what_is_this (T, 44,993 w., 13 Ch. || The Piano Fusion || Victorian Sherlock, Dub Con, Voyeurism, Permanent Mutilation, Johniarty, Mute John) – In 1850, John is a mute young man forced to marry to save his father from indebtedness. His sister as his interpreter and his piano to keep him company, he travels to London to live with his husband James Moriarty. Without John's consent, James sells the piano to his friend Sherlock Holmes, who only asks for lessons from John in return. The lessons turn into a power play between the two when Sherlock proposes a deal: John may earn his piano back one key at a time, certain conditions attached. Part 1 of the Aborted Wings series

Crime is of the Essence by K8BNimble (M, 45,569 w., 18 Ch. || Harry Potter Crossover || Mystery, Slash) – When a man he hasn’t seen in almost ten years appears in his home with a man he thought was dead for twenty years, Harry Potter knew his evening had just gotten complicated. Written for Snarry Swap 2011. Named Hot Rec by "The Daily Snitch"1/18/2011. Snarry, past Harry/Sherlock. Long plotty mystery with light graphic slash sex.

Always 1895 by standbygo (E, 45,901 w., 19 Ch. || Oxford Time Travel AU || Time Travel, Friends to Lovers, Case Fic, Victorian, Period-Typical Homophobia, Pining, First Kiss/Time, First Meetings, Slow Burn, Angst With Happy Ending) – Time travelling historian John Watson goes to Victorian era England to study, and meets detective Sherlock Holmes. He finds himself torn between the work he was sent to do, the exciting life of solving crimes, and the extraordinary Holmes himself.

Curled (A Tangled AU) by crimsonwinter (G, 46,330 w., 13 Ch. || Tangled AU || Alternating POV) – Sherlock lives a limited life, high in a tower, and all he's wanted in eighteen years of isolation is to someday break free and see the floating lights. Somehow, a string of events leads him to John Watson, a surprisingly kind thief who steals his heart. Will they escape the selfish advances of Moriarty, Sherlock's paternal guardian, and will Sherlock find the meaning behind the silver lanterns?

The Boy Who Balanced on the Train Tracks by SinceWhenDoYouCallMe_John (E, 54,894 w., 5 Ch. || Harry Potter Crossover || John/Snape, Period Typical Homophobia, Character Death, Underage Sexual Attraction, Sexual Awakening, Time Turner, First Time, Poverty, Domestic Abuse, Death Eaters, Canon-Typical Violence, Angst with Happy / Bittersweet Ending) – Every year, on the 2nd of May, John Watson dreams of long black hair.

Say You’ll Stay With Me by justacookieofacumberbatch (E, 63,349 w., 21 Ch. || Pretty Woman Fusion || Prostitution) – It was just supposed to be an ordinary business trip, but when John’s car stalls out on Hollywood Boulevard, he meets someone who just might change his life.

Whispers in Corners by esama (T, 64,402 w., 10 Ch. || Harry Potter Crossover || Deathly Hallows, Crossover Pairing) – Everything started with a stumble - his new life in a new world as well as his surprisingly successful career as a medium.

Masters of Ink by Indybaggins (E, 67,382 w., 7 Ch. || Ink Master Tattoo TV Show AU || Angst, Banter, Body Modification, Cheating, Desire, Developing Relationship, Disability, Falling in Love, Feels, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, Married John, Past Drug Addiction, Pining, Requited Love, Sex, Slow Burn, Smoking, Tattoo Artist John, Tattoo Artist Sherlock) – First-meeting-on-a-reality-show AU, Ink Master edition! There is expert tattooing, slightly less expert flirting, and two men falling hard. But John is married, and they can’t all win.

The Craving in Between by love_in_mind_palace (E, 69,349 w., 16 Ch. || Wedding Planner AU || Infidelity, Romance, Angst with Happy Ending, Misunderstandings, Sexting & Texting, Alternating POV, Mary is Not Nice) – Sherlock Holmes, The wedding Consultant. Picky about his projects and a nightmare to work with. Rejects ninety percent of the couples after just having a look at them and can predict how long a marriage will last. But when unassuming, plain, John Watson reluctantly limps his way in his office, with his more than enthusiastic fiancée, Mary Morstan, instead of dismissing the ill-assorted couple on the spot, he promptly decides that the project, and the groom.. are definitely worth working on.

The Loss of Flesh and Soul by deuxexmycroft (M, 69,712 w., 6/8 Ch. || WiP || Silence of the Lambs Crossover || Serial Killers, One-Sided Relationship) – Five years after John Watson puts the murderous Sherlock Holmes behind bars, a vicious copycat killer emerges. A reluctant John is pulled out of retirement to seek the expertise of the only man who can help, a man who has developed an unsettling obsession with John himself. Part 1 of The Loss of Flesh and Soul

The Vampires of London by consultingdetective (E, 72,660 w., 21 Ch. || Dracula AU || Pining Sherlock, Army Doctor John, Sharing a Bed, Porn With Feelings, Plot Twists) – Over one hundred years after the first battle, a series of murders have caught the attention of London's police force and Sherlock Holmes. While most of the city has forgotten the vampire that once walked its streets, the descendants of the Van Helsing, Harker, and Seward families have not.

Save Me or Let Me Drown by GubraithianFire (E, 72,986 w., 16 Ch. || Shameless AU || Dysfunctional Family, Alcoholism, Recreational Drug Use, Angst, Humour, Clubbing, Bipolar Disorder, Custody Battle, Mutual Pining, Family Fluff, Smut, Handcuffs, Anal Sex, Shower Sex, Rimming, Come Shot, Angst With Happy Ending) – How Sherlock escaped from his family, John sacrificed everything to his, and how, together, they built their own. Part 1 of the The Watsons series

This Is Your Song by agirlsname (E, 79,990 w., 19 Ch. || Moulin Rouge Fusion || Prostitute Sherlock, Poet John, Acting, Singing, Dancing, Writing, Poetry, Musical, Song Fic, Heavy Angst, Unreliable Narrator, Sherlock is French, Love at First Sight, UST, First Kiss/Time, Frottage, Coming in Pants, Anal Sex, Switchlock, Clothed Sex, Crossdressing, Secret Relationship, Forbidden Love, Jealousy, Terminal Illnesses, Grief/Mourning, Breakup/Makeup Sex, Past Drug Use, Attempted Rape, Canon-Typical Violence)– When John Watson is invalided home from the army in 1895, he moves to Paris to rediscover his writing and find a new meaning in life. His old friend Stamford invites him into a group of artist friends, and suddenly John finds himself auditioning to write a show for the famous brothel across the street. There, he meets the most beautiful man he’s ever seen - Sherlock, the star of the Moulin Rouge. But Sherlock is already promised to the investor of the show, the rich Duke Moriarty.

Sherlock, P.I. by Callie4180 (E, 83,264 w., 11 Ch. || Magnum P.I. Fusion || Past Relationships, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Canon-Typical Violence, Stalking, Creepy Moriarty) – For the Fall TV Sherlock fusion project. Sherlock, P.I. is an American television show that follows the exciting adventures of genius private investigator Sherlock Homes and his friends as they live their lives on the beautiful island of Oahu in Hawaii. Sherlock solves crimes as he wrestles with the ghosts and demons of his past.

Saudade by tunteeton (E, 96,952 w., 30 Ch. || After That Very Much AU || Case Fic, Non-Con Drug Use, Dubious Science, Canon Compliant up to THoB, John’s in Denial, Sub!Sherlock, Fake Non-Con Drug Use, Dom/Sub Relationship, Mutual Masturbation, Oral Sex, Kidnapping, Threatened Torture, Mary is Not Nice, Anal, Fluff, Non-Con Domming, Verbal Abuse, Slapping) – saudade (port.): a deep and melancholy longing for something or someone that is gone and not coming back. Homesickness, an emptiness in one’s soul, a love that remains after the loved one dies. John loses Sherlock, gains Sherlock and learns to never, ever, ever pray. Part 1 of the The Untranslatables series

Rosethorne by suitesamba (M, 98,888 w., 28 Ch. || Secret Garden AU || Injured Sherlock / John, Recovery, First Times, Minor Character Death, Disability, Past Domestic Abuse [Mary/OMC]) – John Watson, WWII army doctor, is injured in the line of duty and can no longer wield a scalpel. Sherlock Holmes, Britain’s best code-breaker, is side-lined by his own devastating injury. In a work inspired by Frances Hodgson Burnett’s “The Secret Garden,” the two men must find meaning and purpose in a world which seems to have taken away all they hold most dear. But of course, it really hasn’t.

Cake and Other Sins by Indybaggins (E, 100,670 w. || Great British Bakeoff AU || Alternate First Meeting, Angst, Baking, Desire, Disability, Incest (Holmescest/Holmescest with John), Masturbation, Falling in Love, Oral, Outdoor Sex, Past Drug Use, Poisoning, Voyeurism) – Sherlock and John meet as competing bakers on The Great British Bake Off. There’s intense baking, lush recipes and enticing food. Mycroft, guilt, past sins in chocolate and gingerbread. And love. That too.

Fallen Through Time by susandwrites (E, 102,040+ w., 39/? Ch. || Outlander Fusion / Victorian AU || WIP || Time Travel, First Meetings, Meet-Cute, Frottage, Blow Jobs, Anal Sex/Fingering, Riding Crops, Rough Sex, Floor Sex, Breath Play, Light BDSM, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Switching, Romance, Sex to Love) – Inspired by my love of Outlander, but not exactly an Outlander AU. Sherlock Holmes, the world's only consulting detective, finds himself in Victorian London while investigating a murder. The first person he meets is Doctor John Watson, formerly of the Fifth Northumberland Fusiliers and his world is irrevocably altered.

Reichenbach Falls - Déjà vu by VeeTheRee (M, 180,436+ w., 29/303 Ch. || WiP ||Gravity Falls / Multifandom AU || Alternate First Meeting, Gay Sherlock, Mutual Pining, Unilock, Summer Romance/Love, Fluff, Insecure Sherlock, Villain Mary, First Kiss, Slow Burn, Doctor Who, Supernatural, Canadian John, French Canadian Lestrade, Insecure Sherlock, Mystery, Domestic Fluff, Developing Relationship Summer Love, Light Angst, BAMF! John, Case Fic) – Two Canadians, two Brits studying in Canada, and an upkeeper walk into a Mystery Shack…. and live there. Summer holidays are here, and the step-siblings, Irene Adler and Sherlock Holmes, find themselves in a boring town called Reichenbach Falls, Oregon, USA. It isn’t as boring as it seems, however, once Sherlock stumbles upon a mystery journal, and the author is unknown. The journal contains ciphers, a strange colour wheel, and information about magical creatures that are said to be looming in the Northwestern forests. With mysteries to solve in hand, he and Irene set out to get to the roots of the town, and the abrupt disappearance of the author of the journal. But they’re not alone - John Watson, quite the handsome nephew of the Mystery Shack owner Greg Lestrade, is on their side to help out, plus mess with Sherlock’s feelings, in a good way. Shenanigans, romance, fun, danger, and deductions ensue. Oh, and there’s also occasional SuperWhoLock and two dorky Winchester brothers to spark up the action later on. Part 1 of the Reichenbach Falls series

To the Sticking Place by blueink3 (E, 121,973 w., 20 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Musical Theatre AU || Showmance, Friends to Lovers, Bickering, UST / RST, Fluff, Virgin Sherlock, BAMF John, New York City / Broadway) – Renowned Shakespearean actor Sherlock Holmes has finally burned all of his bridges in the theatre industry save for his constant director, Greg Lestrade. John Watson has made a name for himself in the musical theatre circuit, but age and injury are working against him. Can they reinvent themselves for an all-male Macbeth without killing one another? Part 1 of the Screw Your Courage series

Bel Canto by bendingsignpost (T, 127,481 w., 16 Ch. || Phantom of the Opera AU || Secret Identity, Sherlock’s Violin, Operas, Aristocracy, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Disguise, Inheritance, Genderqueer Character, Classical Music, Singing) – After years of waiting for wealthy patrons to faint, Dr John Watson discovers a far more interesting patient in the opera house basement.

Welcome to Silent Hill by Cleo2010 (M, 130,227 w., 37 Ch. || Silent Hill Fusion || POV First Person Sherlock, Unrequited Love, Psychological Horror, Violence / Gore, Monsters, Nudity, Drug Use, Harm to Children, Cults, Distressing Imagery, Torture, Death) – John is missing. When Sherlock receives a text summoning him to Silent Hill he's intent on reclaiming his friend but the town has other ideas. Our detective must battle through a world shaped by his own troubled psyche as he uncovers the town's secrets, attempts to find John and hunt down Jim Moriarty. Part 1 of the Welcome to Silent Hill series

Drift Compatible by J_Baillier (E, 130,380 w., 26 Ch. || Pacific Rim Fusion || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Alternate First Meeting, Angst, Family Drama, Accidental Telepathic Voyeurism, Martial Arts, Sci-Fi, Internalised Homophobia, Rubbish Siblings, Army Doctor John, Medical H/C, Bullying, Neurodiversity, PTSD, Drug Use, Depression, Mourning, Adventure, Hurt/Comfort, UST/URT) – A washed out war hero struggling with his past. A prodigy who wants nothing to do with his family legacy. Both are looking for something—and someone—worth fighting for in a world where human civilisation is constantly under threat.

Out There by DiscordantWords (T, 131,695 w., 10 Ch. || X-Files Fusion || Slow Burn, UST, Case Fic, Government Conspiracy, Aliens, UFOs, Mutants, Mutual Pining, First Kiss, Coma) – FBI Special Agent John Watson, medical doctor and army veteran, is assigned to assist eccentric genius Sherlock Holmes with paranormal investigations on the X-Files project.

Omens On Baker Street Series by WorseOmens (NR, 155,294+ w. across 3 works || Series WiP || Sherlock / Good Omens Crossover || Post S4 Sherlock, BAMF Aziraphale, Soft Crowley, Jealous Crowley, Fluff, Angst, General Idiocy, Misunderstandings, Crimes, Humour, Pining, Crimes, Magical Shenanigans, Unlikely Friendships, ?Slow Burn, True Forms, Ineffable Dads, South Downs) – Sherlock and John are no longer the only crime-solving disaster duo in London. After Sherlock unknowingly wrongs a demon, he finds himself with two mysterious rivals in the detective scene. For Crowley and Aziraphale, it's just a bit of fun, but they end up learning more about human nature than they bargained for.

Skeletons by flawedamythyst (T, 174,262 w. across 3 works || Nightmare Before Christmas Fusion || Implied Character Death) – Sherlock's refusal to talk about his past hides far more skeletons than John could ever have guessed at. Halloween-esque AU.

In the Deep, Where Dark Things Sleep by HardlyFair (M, 184,979 w., 26 Ch. || Scorpio Races AU || Graphic Violence, 1960′s, Slow Burn, Past Drug Use, Bed Sharing, Water Horses, Folklore, First Kiss/Time, Horror Elements, Vet!John, Protective John, Magical Realism, Horse Racing, Mutual Pining, Angst with Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort) – The closer time crawls to November, the more water horses the Scorpio Sea spits out. The colder Thisby becomes. Sherlock Holmes is an islander - completely surrounded by the water. John Watson, he knows, comes from the mainland and lives for the Races. On the first of November, Sherlock will race. The man holding steady by his side is someone he never expects. A Scorpio Races AU (Maggie Stiefvater), but no knowledge of the book needed.

Rom-com adaptations... Series by MorganeUK (T, 211,229+ w across 8 works || Series WiP || Assorted Crossovers || Rom-Coms, Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Friendship, Additional Tags Per Story) – Mostly Johnlock with Mystrade or Lestrolly. If you want a movie to be johnlocked, let me know :-) Each story is completely different from the other!

Enigma by khorazir (M, 289,667 w., 23 Ch. || Codebreaker / WWII / Imitation Game-Inspired AU || Case Fic, Espionage, Period-Typical Homophobia / Sexism, Pining Sherlock, Inexperienced / VirginSherlock, Implied / Referenced Drug Use, Non-Graphic Violence) – It’s the autumn of 1941, war is raging in Europe, German U-boats are raiding Allied convoys in the Atlantic, the Luftwaffe is bombing English cities, and the cryptographers at Bletchley Park are working feverishly to decode their enemies' encrypted communications. One should consider this challenge and distraction enough for capricious codebreaker Sherlock Holmes. But the true enigmas are yet waiting to be deciphered: an unbreakable code, a strange murder, and the arrival of Surgeon Captain John H. Watson of the Royal Navy.

Over/Under Series by khorazir (M, 319,561 w. across 5 works || Cabin Pressure Crossover || Post-S2 / Reichenbach, ReunionFriendship, Angst, Humour, Pining, Cycling, Mountains, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Dev. Rel., Case Fic, First Kiss, Pining, Family Issues, Inexperienced Sherlock) – After his Fall, Sherlock travels the world to destroy what remains of James Moriarty's criminal empire. When things don't go according to plan and he finds himself in desperate need of a discreet means of travel, cue MJN Air ...

#steph replies #johnlock fic recs #my fic recs #crossovers and fusions #to read #Anonymous #long post #e-rated fics

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2lim3rz · 3 years

Note

Do you write for the emperor of mankind? And if you do, what are some head cannons that you have when it comes to him and the primarchs meeting a reader who is from 2021? Crackhead energy, big depression espresso with dry/ meme/ tiktok humor 2021 reader. If you know, you know! Also, I love your content! I look forward to it all the time because it makes me happy.

Oh, I write for the Emperor. Fuck YES I write for the emperor, I'll so make you some headcanons I can't give you tiktok humor 2021 reader because my humor is so all over the place, it's not funny cause I'm laughing at a rage comic from 2011 still BUT crackheads? I can give you that! Thamks a ton for the compliment, I need something to motivate my dumbass anyhow uwu! SO! Let's get to the juice!

THE EMPEROR OF MANKIND [AND A COUPLE OF THE PRIMARCHS] MEETING YOU, A PERSON FROM 2021

THE EMPEROR OF MANKIND

How? How did you even appear first of all? He doesn't know, which is weird. And suspicious. Because he pretty much knows most, if not, everything but the future. Even then, he still knows bits and pieces. So how in the warp-fuckery are you HERE?! HOW DID YOU GET PAST THE CUSTODES?!

So the fact that you're.. there is.. a surprise nonetheless. And he hates surprises. Congrats, you've surprised the Emperor. When they go his way of course. You? You don't really have a purpose for his plans. You're literally a creature from the past

A SUPER far past, you would've been higher up in his eyes right from the start if you were, say, from the Dark Age of Technology and knew some things. But you're not, you're an average person from.. 2021. A year that's not-so-fun. And also one he doesn't quite like because of the online cultures. Yes, the Emperor is.. I think Boomer is the word?? King Boomer wHEEZe

Of course, it's even more surprising when the first words that come out of you are "What in the chili-cheese fuck is this?" he's even more surprise. Right. He somehow forgot that literally everyone somehow went backwards verbally If only he knew what was to come And promptly stops the Custodes from McMurdering you, even a tiktok obsessed person from 2021 can be useful.

You, meanwhile, are just as [if not more] shocked of everything. First off, you were at home, probably goofing off and making a tiktok when.. well, you're here. In a room of gold, gold, and even more gold. So after saying your not-so-non-chalante statement, you quickly followed it up with asking if whoever owns the place is a gold fetishist. Because of course you don't have much of a filter in this era

This whole time, you didn't notice the tall man in armor yet, but that's also because you're still trying to get the spots out of your eyes cause DAMN that was bright

When you DO see the Emperor, you're confused cause one moment, he looks like.. some dude you'd see on the street. A well sculpted and buff dude with eyes that's clearly seen some shit and looks like he'd throw you off the empire state building, but still a dude. The next when you blink your eyes, you're looking at his legs. Armored legs. And you have to careen your head back to look up to his face that's a little too hard to see because of course it did

You're also SUPER overwhelmed and promptly begin an extraordinary freak out because where are you? This isn't a dream and the being in front of you is so.. Him. So indescribable that you can't grasp it in that moment

The Emperor of Mankind, being the epitome of patience and human care, gets you knocked out and put into a medical ward. Mostly to quarantine you, there's no telling if future people have the immune systems to prevent thousands of years of disease differences

Of course, you're A-Okay. The Emperor would argue that you are not okay mentally, but 30k and 40k share one thing in common: No one is mentally sane

KONRAD CURZE

You thought you'd meet Horus or Vulkan? Or literally any other primarch? PSYKE! You're literally just dismissed and Big Papa E wants to meet you. You, of course, refuse help. Can't be that hard to navigate, right? double wrong. Everything's in a weird form of english. It's so close to being english until it ain't. Even everyone else speaks it. It's awful, ain't it?

So of course, when you smell an awful stench [not that everything else had a sorta-weird smell. Soap is MUCH differently scented now-a-days] you're close to freaking out when a giant man literally drops from the ceiling in front of you

After freaking out again, and calling him a "pale batman and mayo smelling motherfucker" he's.. not really amused and you've no idea how close you are to becoming his next Hannibal-esque art project when he sort of grumbles a greeting and stalks off again.

Unbeknownst to you, he sort of was going to greet you.. more-or-less in a more civilized way but you sorta caught him offguard with your semi-gibberish words along with orders from the Emperor [and admittedly Horus and maybe his other brothers] to let you live. Undamaged.

HORUS LUPERCAL

You quickly figure out that it's the vibe of these people that's messing you up. The giant suits of armor ain't any sort of cool robot, but terrifyingly huge people with even more terrifying vibes. It's not like it's any help your first dose of what you call the Big Dude Vibe is from the Emperor.

Did that does of BDV help you withstand some of these people? Yeah. You're also still recovering from the semi-heart attack you got from that pale stranger with the greasiest sort of hair you've ever seen yet. On a face that looks very handsome if it wasn't in perma-snarl mode

So when you meet Horus? A lot better of a change. Dude actually bothers to crouch down and properly speak to you. The language difference is.. a lil messy, but you both get by good enough

At least you have some help in getting your bearings and find your way to the meeting room with the Emperor

In true you fashion, you think it's weird, dumb, and lowkey hilarious that humanity has an Emperor of Mankind with untold power and you, of course, joke about him being a god

Horus is, LUCKILY, kind enough to brusquely explain to you that religion is a big no-no. A BIIIIIG no-no. And what do you hear? Oh, you hear the jokes making themselves.

#warhammer 40k #emperor of mankind #headcanons #2lim3rz request #writing request #request #idk which one i made my tag o lawd #horus lupercal #konrad curze #might do a couple parts of this idk #2lim3rz chats to anonymous

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why-this-kolaveri-machi · 3 years

Text

chin fucking up, amigo.

Titans 3.02

... eh?

SPOILERS ahead.

1. you know that music video for billie jean where michael jackson would dance along the pavement and the tiles would light up under his feet in different colours? yeah? me too.

titans hasn’t met a table top or a support arch that it doesn’t want to light up in a headache-inducing blue like the world’s most boring nightlight. i mean, i’m not an expert on lighting or cinematography or just... colour by any means, and the quality of the video i’m watching is poor given that i can’t access hbo max, but all the orange and teal and neon is making it very difficult to really differentiate between say, the batcave and the gotham police department and hell, the titans tower. i feel like there’s oftentimes a gap between idea and execution with titans, with gotham being this almost otherwordly hellscape with an aesthetic pulled from a gothic horror novel, but the colours and design just... leave it flat and dark and dull.

1.5. like what really frustrates me is that titans has a delightful mix of tones--the fights often remind me of schumacher-era batman camp, with the contrived quips and the start-stop rhythm and krypto just sallying in and ending the fight with a fucking SuperBark (tm) but in the same episode you have red hood just casually pulling out severed heads out of a duffle bag and desperate people blackmailed into killing themselves out of drug overdoses. I MEAN. it’s wonderful! but it looks all the same. it sounds Absolutely Bonkers on paper but on screen both Quip and Murder happen in the same washed-out blue and i wanted to be excited about the batcave, dammit!

2. things re: red hood have happened at such a breakneck speed that it feels like there’s so much that’s happened off-screen that we’re not privy to. a real proper mystery!

things that are intriguing about the red hood arc so far:

a) what was that chemical he huffed just before going to fight the joker? is it a regular old performance/adrenaline booster or is it something more lazarus-juice adjacent? if it’s the latter, i can’t imagine he got that much information from a lone chemistry textbook. and where is he getting the resources to set up his little chemistry lab? is somebody else orchestrating things behind the scenes?

b) the red hood persona, costume and mask, plus the elaborate plan he’s putting in place to both string along gotham’s rogues and enact his revenge against the titans seems too... fully-formed and elaborate to have been concocted in just a few days. how long do you think jason’s been planning this? just... stewing in resentment and building rage, dismissed and passed around and underestimated and realising that the power he thought he would get by being robin is no power, no protection at all, but something that’s left him even more vulnerable than before?

c) do we think that the scarecrow is at least partly behind this transformation? because yes, it was batman that set up this whole hannibal lecter-esque situation with him, and he would be irresponsible enough to have jason-as-robin go talk to him regularly regarding “~profiling~” criminals. it’s not too far of a leap to assume that scarecrow could’ve been manipulating jason at a very vulnerable time, and that he could’ve passed along some of his chemistry know-how, too.

d) ... or fuck, i wouldn’t put it past titans to introduce ra’s al ghul in a fucking ten second aside

e) anyway, the thing that won’t leave me alone is jason seeking out the joker not necessarily to fight him, but to orchestrate his own death. the whole thing has to have been part of a bigger plan. he broke batman with it, after all. and he’s starting to break the titans, too.

f) i love it! i mean, it does re-tread some of the storybeats we had with deathstroke last season (turning the titans against each other as revenge, etc) but it’s... tighter, this time, and at least for now seems better-executed. and as a red hood story it’s different enough to be really interesting, and i appreciate the ways in which its reframed the revenge story to focus on the titans rather than just the batman. like fuck everything up, i say! turn it on its head! slash the innards out of that sacred cow and strew it like garlands in the path of the Story You Want To Tell!

(and yes i am fully aware that by the time i post this review, there will be a whole lot more information out but if i come across like a fool then goddammit i will be a fool!)

2. i love how every season of titans starts off with, ‘oh dick, you thought you were settling into a role and a life and a pattern of relationships? well fuck you, here’s a terrible and traumatic thing, tons more responsibility, and circumstances that will lead you to uproot your entire life and move somewhere else.’ and dick’s just like, ‘well, ok. fuck you, but all right’.

can you imagine? the man was just settling into leading a team in sf and smiling for the first time in years, and now he has to deal with jason’s death, bruce experiencing a full fledged breakdown, coming back to a city that represents more bad memories than good, red hood, and a frightening new case that seems to be targeting him and his team. it’s a testament to dick’s growth that he’s not reacting to this stress like he did last year, shutting everybody out, making irrational decisions and experiencing sharp, short bursts of anger. (not to mention a full fledged psychotic episode.)

2.5. but i’ve also talked about dick performing a fair amount of unwarranted emotional labour for his team(s) in that he just lets them take out their frustrations on him and... does nothing. be it his team exploding at him for jericho (both in flashback and present-day) or donna and hank needling him for handling deathstroke poorly or barbara berating him for not handling the bank situation as well as she thought batman would though just the previous episode she had talked about how fucked up it was that bruce just expected dick to step up and replace him in gotham without any real notice. i mean it’s all perfectly understandable and sympathetic from their end--and i’m not trying to bash them here!--but hank, my man, the same chin you’re asking your amigo to keep up is the one that you punched last year and never apologised for. just sayin’.

2.75. @superohclair did a wonderful breakdown of what the ‘fear’ contract could imply here and there’s not too much i could add to that. it’s just really interesting that fear ended up being such a defining feature of their lives, albeit it’s the fear of seeming less than invincible in the face of bigger, more tangible fears. am i making sense? dick feared loss, and abandonment, and the more existential concept of turning into something that he didn’t want to. bruce so feared being alone that he’s scouting kids to replace robin within days of jason dying.

it also goes some way in explaining the tense sort of... restraint that bruce and dick show in the wake of loss and tragedy, like anything less than complete control of your emotions can lead to tragedy. it’s conditioning that dick couldn’t shake off when he was at his lowest in detroit, hating his legacy but unable to let it go either.

2.775. but i definitely appreciate the softness that dick displays with his team now, checking on them after a mission-gone-bad, welcoming back old members with no caveats or resentments (and kory’s delight in seeing hank back! hank and dick hanging out together and hank trying to prop dick up!), and appreciating their teamwork in solving cases. that’s always been the essence of dick as a person, and the beating heart of this show: flawed and traumatised people coming together to a place that will always be open to them, where they can be their worst and be supported still, allowed to make mistakes and grow from them. that’s family.

2.8. coming back to bruce for just a sec, it’s interesting how that gotham rogue was so certain when he said that ‘batman doesn’t kill’ but it’s not a rule that either jason or dick put much store by when they were robins. the ‘no-killing’ rule clearly didn’t mitigate dick’s fears about turning into batman and jason’s never been seeing giving two shits about it. it seems to me of a piece with bruce’s distant, second-hand sort of parenting that we see in dick’s flashbacks from s1 where the fear was never about personally disappointing batman, but taking lessons from him on finding a place in gotham’s hellish ecosystem and surviving.

3. kory having waking flashbacks! i don’t buy the bullshit parasomnia episode explanation from fake!HPG (because c’mon, justin has to be some sort of tamaranean ruse) because for one, you have to be actually asleep for that diagnosis.

(and here i was, hoping against hope that HPG would actually end up as the team’s therapist)

curiouser and curiouser! i wonder if these flashbacks are from the time between kory landing on earth and the beginning of season 1, when she was completely amnesiac? it’d be cool if the show was considering repercussions from that time, and if kory hasn’t gained all her memories back.

4. i just love the vibes between gar and conner and kory. gar Having Things To Do is only one part of my wishlist for him, however: other parts include having an actual story arc, and actually bonding with members who are not conner and kory. (dick! dick! hank! dick!)

anyway. time to move on to watching ep3 and seeing this family bond and nothing terrible and tragic happening at all, nope, nosiree.

#titans #titans spoilers #meta #dick grayson #jason todd #red hood #koriand'r #garfield logan #bruce wayne #his name is justin.#a byronic cupcake #a tragic jalebi #badass strawberry truffle #manic pixie pop tart

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popculturebuffet · 4 years

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Ducktales Final Four: The Life and Crimes of Scrooge McDuck Review! or The Batman Trial Episode but with Ducks, Sharks, And the Fonz

Hello all you happy people and welcome to the penultimate Ducktales review... for season 3 anyway. I still have most of season 1, all of season 2 (I did cover one but I’ll probably redo it), the tie-in comics, the 87 series, and even then i’ll never really be done with ducks between all the scrooge comics and other duck related shows like Darkwing Duck and Quack Pack. But as far as covering the show as it comes out as i’ve done for the past year, that’s’ts almost done. It’s honestly just starting to hit as I type this: this is the second to last episode. After next week while there’s always fan fiction (And I certainly aim to contribute to that), a possible Darkwing Duck Reboot under frank (though that’s in doubt) where they could show up, and a movie down the road given what we saw with Phienas and Ferb and the show’s popularity it’s still not the same as getting these well animated, well crafted adventures every week with breaks or the ocasional entire week of them. The show won’t go on, and whatever happens with the property next is a mystery no amount of ducks can solve.

So with all that in mind naturally this episode is a breather episode: It’s not unimportant: like the rest of the season it ties off a lot of loose ends, adds in some stuff we didn’t know we wanted, and in general feels necessary like every episode this season. It’s something I credit the season for immensley: They knew this would probably be it so while they had more stories to tell, they made sure if these were their last, to leave no loose ends. And outside of ones they just never wanted to address in the first place like “What happened to Donald’s parents”, “Why was every trace of Della missing despite Scrooge’s search for her having just ended”, and “What did Della thing of the decades long seperation”, they’ve tied up pretty much all of them except for FOWL and what Beakly was lying about, and I feel both are about to ducktail into one another int he finale. Could be wrong but I applaud them for tying off almost every loose end and character arc by this episode that isn’t related to FOWL in some way. Not every show can do that: She Ra was a masterpiece but still had a few things like Scorpia and Catra’s broken relationship, Hordak’s reformation and Adora’s Parents just left up in the air due to time constraints, Steven Universe ONLY got to go back and answer a lot of questions because they were lucky enough to get an epilogue mini series, and Star Vs... was not as good as either show by the end and by the finale about 80% of things it’d brought up all had the following answer:

My point is it’s VERY hard, even when you know the end is coming to tie everything up in a neat bow. And I can’t know how good the finale be or how satsifying it will be but given how well this season’s wrapped everything up so far, i’m betting on immensely. But we can talk about that when it finally comes around next week. For now we have a trial episode to talk about that’s mostly good.. mostly. See why the mostly under the cut as I discuss and recap the episode with full spoilers. Count it down!

We open in the Mansion, where a bunch of tribble like Fuzzy creatures are running amok. Unsuprisingly, Scrooge bought one for Louie as a pet to teach him responsiblity.. again. And once again he instead turned into a get rich quick scheme, didn’t read the manual and now they have an infestation.

ONCE AGAIN, Louie is written like he’s barely changed at all in the past three seasons. Anyone whose been following my reviews regularly knows this has been a pet peeve of mine for the entire season. Despite having an ENTIRE arc about Louie growing as a character and learning the human cost of his scheming and to use his angle seeing talent’s wisely, the writers keep writing him as if he learned nothing. I went back to track it and while not as often as it felt I noticed a few things. The first is that it WASN’T like this for the first half of the season. No really. He even learns brand new lessons in The Trickening and Louie’s Eleven. Granted he also exploits his uncle in Louie’s Eleven but that’s mostly played for laughs.. still not a great bit but not a major part of the episode.

So he was fine for the first act of the season... but then for whatever reason from Let’s Get Dangerous onwards (Again I don’t count the Christmas episode as both of those are meant to slot in anywhere and chronologically take place before this season for the timeline to make any sense), he’s just...

He’s utterly insufferable in his small parts of the first half of Let’s Get Dangerous! as he berates Huey for daring to look a gifthorse int he mouse.. even though everytime he’s seemingly got something for nothing or minimal effort it’s backfired and it’s something that seeemd to stick with “The Richest Duck in the World!”. He’s fine in Impossibin and alright in split sword as while he clearly hadn’t learned lying isn’t the best policy we at least got a good story out of it. He then went right back to obnoxious with New Gods on the Block where he, EPISODES AFTER THE SOLEAGEO FISACO again thinks an easy way out is the right way, and has NO guilt over possibly killing a bunch of people with his gold powers and in fact is disapointed he dosen’t get to keep a living being turned to gold!. He spents all of Fight for Castle McDuck being a huge dick to Huey AGAIN iwth no lesson, and now has yet another family endagering get rich quick scheme he feels no remorse about.

I will admit when I”m wrong and I DID think it was in way more of the season than I thought. And let’s face it in real life personal issues don’t just go away and you can sometimes slide back, i’ve done it way too many times and i’m not proud of it. We’re only human. But this isn’t real life, this is cartoon ducks. And cartoon duck wise most character development has stuck or if a bad trait’s come back it’s been in a new way. Webby is still trusting, but knows how the world works now and while idolizing scrooge dosen’t think he’s perfect anymore. Huey is no longer a skpetic towards the super natural and hasn’t forced a party on anyone. Dewey hasn’t craved other people’s love or thought he needed to earn his mom’s love again. And that’s just the other kids. They aren’t the same people theyw ere going in, neither is Louie. So it’s grating when an episode acts like h’es exactly the same, let alone almost a fifth of the season.

What makes it even worse though is that he had an ENTIRE STORY ARC dedicated to learning some of these lessons already. With the others if one episode were forgotten i’d let it slide as it happens with tv, i’m used to it. It’s not a great look but it happens. Mistakes happen again we’re all human. But you can’t act like an entire arc of a series didn’t exist. While they ignore Della’s history somehow being hidden for the rest of the show they don’t ignore that Dewey spent a whole season looking for her, as he never hides something like that from his brothers again nor do they, and he’s out of them the biggets mama’s boy. While they did take a while to adress Lena, partly because the episode got pushed back, they didn’t act like season 1 never happened and she was still working for her aunt. Della still isn’t on the moon and Owlson still isn’t working for glomgold. Actions. Have. Consequences. That’s the whole point of this episode, but they act like none of it got through to louie and it makes his arc feel like a giant waste in hindsight. This episode even feels like it was SUPPOSED to be in that arc: Louie is back to his season 2 characterization, Scrooge is actively trying to mentor him again.. it just feels really out of place as our second to last episode in that way and drags it down a bit.

Thankfully after Scrooge bars the door, and possibly leaves everyone to their deaths but he presumably has enough faith in the kids, the twins and Beakley to take care of it, he gets a summons to court.. and gets kidnapped. He and Louie are whisked away to a mystic court presided over by a giant statue of justice holding scales, that judges someone based on Karma. Scrooge’s foes have brought him to court, blaming him for being evil and if he looses he looses EVERYTHING. And their proscutor?

Sadly not Droopy, maybe next continuity, but searing the same Hannibal-Esque Getup is Doofus Drake to Louie’s horror. As for why he’s like this.. he thought iht was fun. Great gag.

After the credits we find out why he’s doing this: He’s still pissed about Louie taking half his inheritance and giving it to his family, so he’s going to take LOUIE’S inheritance. It’s.. honestly a great setup: Doofus was already a villian I liked, being a nice weird evil mirror dewey instead of a walking fat joke like last series. So I was glad to both see him pop up one last time to make it a full trilogy of apperances as an angonist and to see him take a step up from his passive roll in the past: in his first two apperances while he was evil and abusive, and still is, his evil was mostly due to his own warped logic, feeling he could put shock collars on and control people and that Louie lying to him was enough to warrant making him into a pinata. He’s still a bad person mind you: kid or not he ensdlaved his parents, tried to enslave louie and goldie and in general REALLY needs some help empathizing with people. But my point is that before he didn’t come after anyone.. so it’s a nice capper to have his final turn as antaognist be him going after our hero.. and at his most dangerous. Before someone would’ve come for Louie eventually in Doofus’ first apperance and Goldie would’ve found a way out or Scrooge, despite grumbling about it, would’ve helped.. if nothing else than to lord having to save her from a 12 year old over her. Here if he wins the family is out on the street and three of their greatest enemies are now infinitely more well funded.

So while naturally unnerved by his rival Louie offers to defend Scrooge who denies it despite the fact that Louie is REALLY good with words, and Scrooge, while not bad with them, can’t stop shouting and keeps pissing off the baliff, played by my boy Henry Winkler whose done a lot of voice work and also played Fonzie on Happy Days, is currently on the HBO series barry and in general is just a fucking delight. The irony is also not lost on me that he’s not playing a lawyer here despite being one on arrested development.

We get our first witness: FLINTHEART GLOMGOLD. Hell. Yes. It’s nice to see him in his full glory one last time, as I don’t know how much he’ll be in the finale. Scrooge blows of the Duke Baloney thing, which is fair given that while Scrooge screwed up there, Glomgold still stole money from him right after and then spent his whole life trying to one up him. But Glomgold has a different tale in mind as he stole something else from him: the limelight.

It was 1980-something and Glomgold was a bonified celebrity in Duckberg for his hot dogging, grandstanding and treasure hunting loved by all and took Baba Wawa, a nice mix of Barbra Walters and the parody of her on SNL by the late Gilda Radner, to a shark shaped cave to get the gem of the shark god, a ruby tooth at the end of the cave. Naturally Scrooge popped up and easily made his way through and stole the spotlight. As it turns out he wasn’t always well loved and it makes sense: he dismises Baba asking him about how disliked he is, and dosen’t care and even in the current story, or rather season 1 of it, he dismiseed PR entirely in Jaw$. He was rich enough and enough of a job provider he just didn’t see the need for fame or glory, that just came second so it’s logical no one liked him. Fortunes naturally reverse as you’d expect though: Glomgold dashes forward and ends up putting Baba and her camerabird in danger and being Glomgold he irrationally assumes she’s working for Scrooge and leaves her to die. Scrooge however, after getting the rock, goes out of his way to save her because it’s the right thing to do. He can be selfish at times, and as we’ll see monstrously so, but at his core Scrogoe is a good man who will do right when the chips are down. So this leaves Glomgold trapped and Scrogoe getting his good press instead and realizes he likes the attention.

As the flashback ends Glomgold fills in the gaps, pointing out he was stuck with the sharks for days, but slowly bonded with them learned from them and they became family, helping him with traps, joining him for thanksgiving and even getting a heart taatoo with a shark on it. Awww. Look I didn’t really need to know where Glomgold’s love of sharks came from, nor that he had some weird tarzan origin story with them.. but my life is 100% better knowing all of this so thank you Frank and Matt. Thank you. I’m also entirely convinced the two have had this whole part of his backstory ready to go for three seasons and were waiting to use it, along with the other two bits we’re about to get to. This episode as you can tell is also a vingette episode, but one where the wraparound is way more improtant than usual.. but it works given the setting and allows the stories to be as long as they actually need to be, and it addds some nice stakes instead of just having Scrooge’s villians gripe about him.

Scrooge protests and the Bailiff puts a clamp on his beak, so he has no choice in the matter when Louie steps up for the defense. Louie also proves that irresponsible he may be.. he’d be a damn good lawyer, as he easily picks things apart, pointing out Glomgold was ALREADY bad by then, Scrooge had no intent to steal the spotlight and Glomgold is currently planting dynamite under his chair, with predictable and hilarious results. So he gets put on the “good” side of the scale. Next witness.

Next up is Ma, and I was delighted that as I’d hoped and theroized this episode wrapped up one little plot point that while not major, was something I was curious about: Ma’s claims Scrooge stole Duckburg from her family. This was also likely the backbone of the episode at one point as Frank pitched a beagle trial episode at one time, but Disney nixed it. Likely the magic stuff was added both to justify it better and to distract Disney Channel’s higher ups because they constantly underestimate what a child will like. It was for the best though as the beagles are just a bit weaker here: While Character Actress Margo Martindale is a delight and was specifically cast for the role, overall it just feels like they ran out of ways to make the beagles a big threat and releigated them to muscle when needed, to the point they only appeared in one episode besides this one this season as with FOWL about, they didn’t really need villians of the week and what ones they did use like Glomgold and Mark were far more entertaining villains who needed a coda to their stories.They aren’t bad characters, but in a series where their breaking into the bin or mansion wasn’t a story the crew was interested in they served no real purpose.

So we finally get answers about the whole Deed thing: It was sometime in Ma’s childhood, good look guessing when, and the Beagles owned Duckburg having clearly overwhelmed Fort Duckburg at some point in history between Clinton’s defense of it and now, with Grandpa “Pa” Beagle finally making an apperance. In the comics he was basically what Ma is to both series: the scheming brains behind the beagles who showed up on occasion and it was a good idea to use him as the past version of her.

Scrooge naturally comes a calling and unsurprisingly Ma was lying: Scrooge offered to buy the place first from Pa, he refused outright, and then when Scrooge showed off the money he was offering, Pa bet the deed for it in an arm wrestling contest. Not only that but as Scrooge finds out as he almost looses, Pa was cheating having a smaller beagle boy operate pull a lever in a device attached to his arm to give pa extra force. Scroooge simply dropped a few coins to distract the guy and claimed victory and the deed.

Little Ma is left dejected though and Doofus claims he ruined his life, but Louie steps up, at this poitn Scrooge has learned to reign himself ina nd accepted Louie as his defense without saying anything, a nice subtle bit. He probably realized that while irrepsonsible.. Louie has everything to loose her and no reason to slack off and dosen’t even relaly have to lie for his uncle to get him off: he’s simply using his ablitiy to see all the angles to poke holes in their story.

Case in point, he orders the “tape” to continue and finds Little Ma berating her dad for his failure and forcefully taking control of the family. LIke Glomgold, Scrooge may of cost her something.. but it was something she and her family hadn’t earned and they were still on a bad road. Scrooge just made it worse.

But suprisingly, its MAGICA, who we’ve established is an uncaring monster, who has a story Scrooge genuinely feels bad about. Like the rest she was not a good person: Long ago she and her brother Poe were extorting a villiage, and lording over it as gods, changing the population into goats, toads and other things. The only diffrence from what Magica would do to the blot and presumiibly others later, is that Poe reigned in her manical tend ices, trying to get her to think things through. The goat transformation was so they’d have milk and at least get something out of it and as to not waste all their slaves. Poe is voiced by Martin Freeman of The Hobbit and Black Panther fame. Great actor, does amazing work here. So like the others Scrooge changed things, and fought someone with bad intentions for his own self. He talked Magica into fighting him with both amulets by playing into her ego and Poe trying to talk her down, and easily deflected her bolt with the dime to turn her into a crow with her own spell. So far it’s just like the other tales in a nice mirror.. it’s what comes next that makes Scrooge into a bad guy too. Not as bad as Magica and Poe.. but sitll not good. Poe dives selflessly in front of the coin.. and shockingly while she cared nothing for Lena.. that wasn’t the case for Poe. Magica is truly devastated, desperatly trying to put the amulet back on and begging scrooge for help while he just ignores her and fills up his sack. And while they both deserved it... Scrooge and Louie both recognize he was wrong as the flashback ends with Poe escaping and Magica sitll haven’t having found him to this day. And props to Catharine Tate here a she takes a normally hammy terrible person who was wholly unsympathetic and manages to make her painfully human.

What makes the act so terrible is not who it happened to, they both desrved it, but Scrooge’s attitude, utterly callous to magica’s pain with not a drop of sympathy. While she deserved it as did Poe.. he’s not doing this to her as some justice for her crimes, or because she did something horrible to him or any valid reason.. he’s doing it because he’d rather get more of her and poes gold than lift one finger to help someone who had , for all his evil, selflessly sacrificed himself for his sister. For all Poe’s evil and tyranny.. there MIGHT of been a good man in them, in both of them.. and Scrooge could’ve cared less. He shut the door on Magica ever becoming a good person, ever getting her brother back to line his own wallet and to satisfy his own ego. See that’s the true mark of a hero: how they treat others, even the worst of them. And in his lowest moment Scrooge could’ve cared less about anyone but himself.

Scrooge feels bad and Louie does finally get the responsibility thing and this is where things start to go off the rails: he apologizes to Doofus and admits he dosen’t want an enteral rivalry and h’es sorry for any pain he caused. The off the rails part is because Doofus is genuinely not a good person, ahs done very bad things and is trying to bankrupt Louie for the crime of “taking half your fortune after you used it to torment and enslave your own parents’. It just.. dosen’t play as well as they’d like. That said I DO like both Louie deciding to bury the hatchet instead of just avoiding him and Doofus showing some nobiity in accepting it. Maybe he’ll change.

He goes off into the night, and Scrooge genuinely apologizes and accepts repsonsiblity... and here’s where the plot finishing going off the rails and into someone’s living room: the bailiff AWARDS THEM SCROOGE’S FORTUNE BECAUSE HE ADMITTED SOME CUPLABLITY AND WAS HUMBLE.

This just.. it makes no sense, it will never not baffle me and it hurts my brain> Yes he admitted some wrong doing and apologized for it.. but it was also THROUGHLY proven the other two weren’t his fault, and he was simply being a good man which should get him some good. Thankfully the conclusion is a bit better, as Louie points out while they made him, he made you so who made who, who made you... okay i’m getting into the AC/DC of things point is these incidents all shaped Scrooge into a better person. His mistake with Magica. is clearly learned from. He’s stopping a group of bullies in Ma’s story and saving a life without a second thought in the second. He learned to value others, to value family all because THEY showed him what happens when you don’t. By seeing the worst person he could be.. he became the best. So the trial’s thrown out his assets are returned, and their teleported out before magica can hit them with lighting. Lesson learned.. well kinda Louie tells scrooge to do it because he got the pet.

Final Thoughts for The Life and Crimes of Scrooge McDuck:

Great title aside.. this one is a mess. It’s not a terrible episode: the flashbacks are genuinely engaging, each one helping flesh out the villians and in Ma’s case pulling one last dangling plot thread. Glomgold’s was just entertaining , clevelry using his 80′s origns for an 80′s style news special and giving us the origin to his love of sharks that we didn’t know we needed., Ma’s tied up a loose plot threat with a fun flashback and Magica’s was genuinely heart wrenching and did the tall task of making us feel for someone that terrible. The wraparound.. was a bit weaker. Doofus was the best part, playing an excellent manipulative bastard lawyer, and being a genuine threat and his walking away peacefully was a nice touch, and Louie having to defend scrooge was great and showed him off better than ever. And Louie did get some moments to shine.. it was just wierldy bookened with him acting terribly AGAIN, in a way he should know better than in an episode where he acts fine for most of it and even then he thinks lying to a judge is a good idea! I know he’s 12 but he’s not this stupid and while as I made very clear i’ve seen this shit before, I haven’t seen it flip flop in the same episode. Louie deserves better than this.

But it’s also in service to a responsiblility aseop that just.. dosen’t work as presented. Yes you should take responsiblity for your past, yes you should learn from your mistakes and own up to them, I have, and yes it’s all too easy to slide back> That’s all fine.. but him apologizing to Ma, whose family was terorrizing a town, and Glomgold, who he did nothing to, and having Louie apologize to Doofus, who while he tried to exploit him still enslaved his own parents and deserved to loose half his fortune AND loosing half his fortune wasn’t even the main thing Louie wanted to do as his main goal was getting BOYD a loving family.. it’s bullshit. Just pure Grade-A bullshit. Why are you booing them their right. It’s a good idea for a moral but it’s executed so overwhelmingly poorly it bogs down what was otherwise an exceptional episode, into just passable. It’s just mind numbing and saddening to know the next to last episode wasted so much good ideas on a clumsy moral. Thankfully I have hope the finale will be better, and again at least we got some good out of this one.

Next Time: Endgame Baby! Clan McDuck and their Amazing Friends Vs F.O.W.L. for the fate of adventure itself! One last ride! I can hardly wait!

This week on the blog: Ducks Ducks and more ducks.. and a top 12 list of my faviorite superheroines later today’s for international women’s day. But after that we have more of the Della arc, the last step in the Lena arc before Shadow War next week, and the 87 ducktales pilot treasure of the golden suns!

If you liked this review, share it around, follow for more, and you can comission your own for 5 dolalrs an issue or episode, or kick in some money on my patroen, link on my blog. Even a dollar a month helps and my next stretch goal is 5 dollars away and if we reach it i’ll review both the super ducktales mini series introducing gizmoduck AND a darkwing duck episode a month. Until the next rainbow it’s been a pleasure.

#ducktales #the life and crimes of scrooge mcduck #scrooge mcduck #louie duck #doofus drake #magica de spell #poe de spell #FLINTHEART GLOMGOLD #ma beagle #the beagle boys #disney channel #disney #ducks #uncle scrooge

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k-s-morgan · 4 years

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(Part 1) I just read your new chapter of TGSTLTH and my god it was amazing. I'm just wondering what, as someone who is also aro-ace, am I right in hoping/assuming that this fic won't go in a sexually explicit direction? I know you've mentioned that it'll become more outwardly 'romantic' in the latter part, but I'm wondering if it'll ever go beyond that. Obviously there is physical attraction between the two, but I've always seen them as something very hannibal-esque - where explicit physical

(part 2) intimacy would almost do a disservice to the complex, psychological nature of their relationship (hence why the hug at the end of Hannibal S3 was so beautiful and effective). Ciel, to me, seems completely asexual in nature, all things considered, and Sebastian, being a demon, would also posess a strong indifference to such human processes (as demonstrated by Beast).

(part 3) What is so beautiful about their relationship is that it transcends shallow human urges - being neither sexual nor (traditionally) romantic, but something much darker and more intense as a psychological relationship. Such complete devotion to one another, unmarred by the traditions of humanity, is poetic in nature, and is what drew me to them in the first place.

(part 4) That being said - I am also aware of the number of explicit fics that exist about these pairings, and am wondering whether this particular one will contribute to this majority. Since I'm of the sex-repulsed sector of the ace community, I usually vehmently avoid / filter out explicit tags

(part 5) and I noticed that TGSTLTH is tagged under Mature (which makes perfect sense considering the dark topics that it handles), but I guess I'd just like to ask if that tag is going to change at any point during the fic's duration

---------------------------------------------

Hello! Thank you, I'm happy you liked the chapter!)

There will be some sexual depictions in a very distant future, but that tag won’t change! Personally, I see Ciel as graysexual and Sebastian as demisexual, with both being attracted exclusively to each other during the course of the story - though not in a very human way. I'm not sex-repulsed, but I do dislike writing about sex in stories. I do it only when I feel the characters demand it. Ciel and Sebastian, in my perception, will be explosive together, but that will happen ages from now and I definitely won't go into many details.

The focus will always remain on other aspects of their relationship. For the most part, sex will be simply implied, with very few exceptions, and in those exceptions, I want to try a more twisted and demonic approach :D Because I agree that their urges are unlikely to be fully human. If you are still reading TGSTLTH by the time we finally get there, I’ll put up a warning: these scenes will be short and very few in between, so they’ll be easy to skip!

#my fics #sebaciel

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brave-clarice · 4 years

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“Clarice” Liveblog: Episode 2

Again, some extremely unfashionably late hot takes.

(Special thanks to @kathrynethegreat and @special-agent-pendragon for encouraging another liveblog!)

Clarice is working out! And eating junk food! I love it.

and cleaning her gun!

hey, Ardelia is drinking what I’m going to assume is her grandmother’s “smart people tea”.

Krendler disciplining Clarice already is infuriating but appropriate.

“I lost control.” Oh no, I don’t like that. Don’t make Clarice unstable. Her mental and emotional state never had anything to do with her failing career.

getting weird mixed signals from Ardelia. Last week, she obviously didn’t want Clarice to lie/stick to the script Krendler gave her, but now she’s telling Clarice she messed up by not doing so...?

“I better know you if you’re calling this early.” Amen, Ardelia.

I’m in love: this cinematography is straight out of the film (when she’s flying to WV with Crawford)!

“When’s the last time you went back to Appalachia?” “It’s been years.” What??? It has NOT been years--Clarice was JUST in West Virginia last week as well as in Silence, and she arguably attended college there as well. (UVA is at least nestled in the mountains, and you don’t have to drive far outside the Albemarle Valley to hit Appalachia proper.) After all the details about her character they’ve been nailing, they miss this glaring error?

I like the tiny details she’s noticing (like the guy biting his nails). Not only because she’s an investigator, but because it’s reminiscent of Hannibal’s influence (imo).

Clarice Is Short: The Saga continues

still not getting any creepy vibes off Krendler. He’s going to be much less effective as an antagonist if he isn’t lewd as well as a dick.

I really don’t care for the way the opening “credits” fade out from the death’s-head moth to Clarice’s face. There are MANY animals that represent her, or parts of her, in the books--lions, lambs, horses, and of course birds--so this choice feels empty and lazy to me.

also lazy: having a fellow agent straight-up tell her in episode 2 “you shouldn’t be in the Bureau.” Maybe in two or three years, after some further “Death Angel”-type incidents, I could see this blatant rudeness, but not yet.

“Reesey”? Thanks, I hate it.

this flashback must be of Clarice’s little brother. That answers one question I had last week. That said...Clarice’s brother doesn’t play the same role in her story that Mischa does in Hannibal’s--but this sure feels like a Mischa-esque flashback.

good: they’re finally getting to the source of Clarice’s actual trauma!

bad: this is NOT how Clarice found out about her father. In fact, that whole incident is laid out in detail in the novels, and there’s nothing overly literary/un-cinematic about it, so this feels unnecessary. “The police are here! Something happened to Daddy!” No, bad! Show, don’t tell!

she would’ve known better than to introduce herself to that kid as “Clarice Starling, FBI,” come on now.

were they regularly able to wire tap hair clips in 1993?

actually, nothing in this show looks very 90s to me so far. I’m sad about it.

so in eighteen months, Ruth Martin has gone from a junior Senator to the Attorney freakin’ General, and now she might run for governor?? At least let her get settled in one position of power first, why don’t you!

yet more Buffalo Bill flashbacks...alas.

are they trying to make this guy another surrogate Hannibal character? He’s commenting on Clarice’s accent and the dryness of her skin, asking about who she “left behind”...it all feels very Hannibal. (I know he’s a Charismatic Cult Leader trope, too--but when played off of Clarice...)

“Ew.” “I hate this guy.” I laughed.

I understand that Clarice probably feels conflicted re: her siblings in the book, but I’m really not digging the flashbacks of this Tim Burton character her brother.

@ the writers: Clarice already has the lamb backstory/symbolism, too. We don’t need this Little Brother stuff.

*shrieking* Mrs. Starling! At the sink washing the blood out of his hat!!!

...aaand they had to ruin it with the brother’s painfully bad dialogue. Will still be good for gif-making, though.

are we supposed to interpret all these flashbacks as Clarice being incapable of controlling her emotions/state of mind? She keeps losing herself in memories and emerging all doe-eyed and panicky. I don’t like it.

not to be a broken record but...Clarice should be TOUGH. Again, Ardelia only saw her cry once in seven years. But she’s more worked up in this scene than Jodie was in Memphis!

when Mr. Cult Leader shouts “Agent Starling! Agent Starling!” he sounds exactly like Hannibal calling her back to his cell in the asylum. That has to be intentional.

damn, wish that I could look as good five minutes after I’ve been crying as Clarice does.

I LOVE that Ardelia gets to be the crucial behind-the-scenes book-smart partner to Clarice’s action heroine.

AG Martin’s just playing politics by turning a blind eye to the crooked sheriff. But when her own daughter was just kidnapped and almost killed, she looks like a real hypocrite.

gosh, Rebecca Breeds is great. I already hope she gets nominated for an Emmy.

so Krendler is...doing the right thing???

Clarice’s father was definitely not a sheriff. I hope she’s just exaggerating for dramatic effect. (Maybe this will be clarified later.)

she couldn’t just sit with a manipulative guy without getting emotional, but she’s cool as a cucumber while telling an extended story about her father? HmmMM.

sometimes her mannerisms and facial expressions are so much like Jodie’s that it’s uncanny, like here when she leans forward to confront the Cult Leader.

“She did it.” Damn straight!

another great callback to Silence. this show’s camera crew knows its stuff!

“He’s concerned I have some residual trauma from Bill.” I. Hate. This. Subplot--and all its OOC implications.

“Catherine was close to her father, too.” Ooh, a nice allusion to the novel! Clarice makes note of their “common wound,” the loss of a father, when she’s in Catherine’s apartment in Silence.

she is just SO pretty.

little Clarice looks a LOT like Rebecca Breeds. I hope we see some more of her.

The Good:

the continuing visual nods to the Silence film via cinematography

Mama Starling!!!

Clarice’s “The World Will Not Be This Way Within the Reach of my Arm” attitude, refusing to leave without helping the victims.

Ardelia Mapp coming in clutch!

Clarice being, generally, a badass

and using psychological tricks/mind games to pin the antagonist...that’s the woman who disarmed a monster with just a few words.

Rebecca Breed’s acting has been phenomenal so far.

I like Clarice’s haircut a lot better when worn down (though it’s not very practical for fieldwork, so we probably won’t see it much).

The Bad:

the continuing Buffalo Bill-related Trauma Subplot. Ugh.

all the flashbacks to Clarice’s brother (and the not-so-subtle suggestion that her brother is, symbolically, another lamb).

will the real Paul Krendler please come forward? this guy is so TAME.

the other agents’ hostility towards Clarice needs to be toned down slightly so that it can escalate. Otherwise, where’s the tension?

is this actually 1993? I’m not feeling it. Shouldn’t it have a little of that Season 1/2 X-Files aesthetic? Please give me more than once-an-episode references to pagers and fax machines!

that glaring Appalachia continuity error...it’s still bugging me.

I missed the overt Hannibal references, even though they’re not necessary to any part of this episode. A lady can dream!

Overall, I really liked this one despite my various issues with it. It started shakily but built to a great finish. The emphasis across both episodes on Clarice being in the FBI not just to “get out, get anywhere,” but out of a genuine desire to help victims has been wonderful. I just hope they don’t swerve too far into the “too traumatized and emotionally compromised to function” lane. It would be a disservice to Clarice’s character and to her journey (and would smack too much of “Hannibal really did prey on her weak mind/brainwash her”.

Things I’d still like to see: More of her personality. Her hobbies and interests. That she’s cleaning her gun is great! Now let’s see “Poison Oakley” practicing her sharpshooting skills. Or car shopping. Or clothes shopping to show off her “developing taste.” (Ardelia can come!) I’ll take literally anything. Give us more of Clarice’s sense of humor as well. She had some subtle funny moments in the pilot, and it’s nice to see Rebecca smile for a change.

And Krendler? Smear that man in grease! I appreciated a happy ending even though Clarice’s career is, as we know, already in a downward spiral--the last thing we want is for every episode to be a slog, especially when a good chunk of the audience hasn’t read the book and doesn’t know Clarice is doomed to fail in the Bureau.

However... Krendler’s not a “redemption arc” kind of character. Or even a “run-of-the-mill sexist asshole” character. This is a man who spent seven years systematically sabotaging a young woman’s career because a) he was jealous that she solved the Gumb case before him, and b) she wouldn’t fuck him. He was a Justice Department official working fist-in-glove with a serial child molester who was planning some of the heinous vigilante justice imaginable. THAT’S why his very gruesome end at Hannibal’s hands felt deserved--even Clarice thought so! In short, he needs to get nasty.

Anyway, thanks for coming to another long-overdue TedTalk. Fingers crossed that the next one will be more timely (aiming for Sunday night)!

#Clarice Starling #clarice #cbs clarice #rebecca breeds #once again I apologize for how late this is #and how long and somewhat ranty lol #please let me know if you want more ♥♥♥#media [cbs show]#char [clarice starling]

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rawiswhore · 3 years

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Triple H, Shawn Michaels x Fem Reader- "I Love Men"

December of 1997 would be a transitional time for the World Wrestling Federation.

During that month in that year, WWF CEO Vince McMahon made a speech ushering in a new era of the WWF, an era of antiheroes and edgier content, this era would be known as the Attitude era.

The era that would save the WWF from going out of business, be even more popular than the WWF in the 80's, and introduce us to some of the most iconic wrestling stars of the past 25 years.

This new era was also not like the WWF people were used to in the 1980's and even the 1990's.

No, this new era was a lot edgier, more violent, more oversexualized, and had some shock value.

What was once a kid friendly company that seemed like a live action Saturday morning cartoon and even had its own Saturday morning cartoon during the mid 1980's now wasn't something most parents would want their kids watching.

There were signs the Attitude era was coming about even before Vince McMahon made that speech that ushered in this new era, with Stone Cold Steve Austin being a middle finger throwing brawler, Mankind being a Hannibal Lector-esque psychopath, Brian Pillman pulling a gun out on Stone Cold and turning Goldust's wife into his personal sex slave, Kane being a horror movie villain whose face was burned during his childhood, Sable shedding a potato sack to reveal herself in a bikini that left almost nothing to the imagination and D Generation X being rebellious punks that spraypainted racist graffiti on black wrestler's locker room walls, sticking the Canadian flag up their noses and Triple H making jokes about his penis.

Some have even said the Attitude era began before Vince McMahon made that notorious speech ushering in this new era.

And you were one of the signs the Attitude era was coming about soon.

You were once Hunter Hearst Helmsley's elegantly dressed valet in evening gowns and silky opera gloves, who never said or did anything controversial or shocking.

However, sometimes in 1997, you were caught making out with Hunter in the back of a limo on "Monday Night Raw" as well as looking like you and Hunter were going to get busy as they say, but that was tame in comparison.

By the end of 1997, you ripped off an evening gown the audience was used to you wearing to reveal yourself wearing a skimpier, hooker-like outfit with a miniskirt and tube top, as well as did some moments like bending down and pretending to drop a makeup compact you were holding while you stuck your ass up in the air while Triple H, Shawn Michaels and the New Age Outlaws looked under your skirt and made gestures with their index fingers like they wanted to fingerbang you.

At the end of 1997, you cut a rather seductive and sexy wrestling promo that would lead to the character you'll always be remembered for playing in the WWF/E: a boy-crazy, seductive, slutty nymphomaniac with histrionic personality disorder that seduced wrestlers you thought were sexy.

Basically like a female Val Venis or a wrestling version of Madonna in the early 90's.

This wrestling promo started off by filming your leg covered in a silky red blanket as the camera slowly panned up your body while slow, jazzy music was playing in the background, the camera halting at filming up your body once it reached to you and Triple H's heads.

You and Triple H were snuggling in bed together right next to each other, you were curled up right next to him.

Triple H was shirtless and had his long, flowing blond locks hanging down, not tied with a little ponytail in the back or little braids, and one of his huge arms was wrapped behind you.

You were stark naked under that blanket, but the blanket was covering your nude body below your shoulders.

One of your hands, in particular the tip of your index finger, was horizontally running up and down his bare chest while he was smiling and you were looking at him, grinning from ear to ear.

Your eyes then panned to the camera, introducing yourself to the audience, your voice sounding seductive and sexy, like a phone sex girl.

This promo sounds like and looks more like a phone sex hotline commercial rather than a wrestling promo.

"I lovemen" you gushed, your eyes rolling to the top of your head when you enunciated the word "love".

"Men's bodies produce testosterone; which increase their libido" you explained while the tip of your index finger drew circles on one of Triple H's pecs. "As well as muscle and strength"

Your hands moved to Triple H's massive biceps and squeezed on both of them when you added how testosterone increases muscle and strength.

Though, there's something else that increased Triple H's arms and it ain't testosterone.

Or weightlifting.

You then rolled over, only for the camera to show that you weren't alone in this bed, and lying right next to you was Shawn Michaels.

Shawn, too, was shirtless, and his long brown hair was hanging down, he barely had any facial hair on his face.

The silky blanket was still covering your breasts as well as your naked body.

You snuggled yourself up next to show, nudging him, and one of your hands caressed up and down the middle of his chest, where his chest hair is.

He grinned while you stroked his chest, his chest hair was in between your fingers.

"Some men have chest hair" you explained, "That's not just a sign of masculinity; but perfect to run your fingers through".

The tip of your index finger drew circles in the middle of Shawn's hairy chest while you said that, his chest hair rolling and curling around the tip of your finger, but not enough for his chest hair to wrap around a tight grip on top.

'Tis a shame Scott Hall a.k.a. Razor Ramon is over in WCW (and you don't just mean over in wrestling lingo as something the audience really enjoys), because his chest hair is iconic, and he probably would love this promo.

Scratch that, he would.

Jeff Hardy could've been in this promo as well considering he had chest hair, even back then.

You then rolled your body over and crawled over the silky bed sheets, to where Triple H's genitals are.

When you crawled, you were trying not to show your bare naked breasts, but the tops of your arms were blocking your nipples from being shown.

Your face and head were close to Trips' crotch, covered and shielded by that silky blanket you were sharing with him, you stopped crawling once you were lying right next to his crotch.

"But my favorite thing about men" you started "Is their manhood"

You lifted one of your hands and placed the pad of your index finger over where Triple H's cock is, horizontally running that finger up and down.

Triple H actually was naked in this promo and he and Shawn had massive, blatant boners hiding under those bedsheets for you.

You can see Triple H's erection (or at least a prosthetic) poking and protruding through the silky bed sheets.

Plus, Triple H and Shawn Michaels in general were meant to have erections during this promo considering they play such naughty scamps in the WWF.

"They've got something down there that's hot, tender and juicy" you expressed while you ran your index finger horizontally up and down Triple H's shaft "That's perfect to suck on"

Triple H's hands moved above his crotch where they crossed an "x" shape at the wrist when you said "suck on", your lips grinned and smiled a naughty shit eating grin without showing your teeth.

"And testosterone is also responsible in producing something" you added "That I love as much as I love men"

No, you don't mean pee or worse, poo, because women poo and pee as well.

You mean cum.

Jizz.

Sperm.

Semen.

Spunk.

Skeet.

When you referenced how testosterone produces something you love as much as men, your fingers grabbed onto Triple H's scrotum covered by a blanket and gently squeezed them.

Your finger was stroking up and down Triple H's penis, but not Shawn Michaels'?

And you're grabbing Triple H's package but not Shawn's?

Ah well, Shawn Michaels took his pants off when he was playing strip poker, but Triple H didn't take his pants off.

And Triple H used to always crack dick jokes but Shawn Michaels didn't, even though women in the audience would shriek like maniacs hearing that.

Triple H in 1997 didn't piss you off as much as Shawn did backstage, though Shawn is sexier than Triple H.

"C'mon boys" you said, your eyes looking at Triple H, "I'm sick of talking"

Triple H and Shawn looked at each other and smiled, where you crawled back into bed with them and one of Trips and Shawn's hands grabbed the covers and pulled them over your ass, shielding your ass from being shown on television, and you slid under the covers, Triple H wrapping one of his huge arms around you and pulling you closer to him while Shawn snuggled up right next to you.

You giggled like a schoolgirl and smiled from ear to ear while Triple H looked like he was leaning his lips into yours.

You sounded like phone sex girl all throughout this promo, which was the intention of it.

Jerry Lawler must be drooling uncontrollably watching this promo, but he can go fuck himself.

Despite that the Attitude and Ruthless Aggression eras are the 2 most beloved WWF/E eras ever, one thing about those eras that hasn't aged well and has faced criticism is that most of the female roster were treated as sex objects, not as wrestlers.

Even women who were wrestlers like Ivory and Jacqueline were turned into sex objects sometimes.

But your wrestling promo sexually objectifies men and treats them as sex objects; this promo was you gushing over how you love men, but not for their personalities, but when they produce testosterone and what testosterone leads to.

Y'know, women have breasts you can suck on, squeeze and play with, and pussies you can eat, finger and fuck.

_____________________________________________________________

I originally planned on typing a fanfic where the fem reader is a ringrat that Hunter Hearst Helmsley introduces to other wrestlers, and eventually the fem reader gets gangbanged by the likes of Hunter, Razor Ramon, Shawn Michaels, Marty Jannetty, Bret Hart, Davey Boy Smith and a wrestler named Avatar (who would later on play Al Snow).

But...I've been afraid this fanfic will be too similar to the one where the fem reader joins the WWF and she gets gangbanged by Hunter, Shawn, Brian Pillman, the New Rockers, etc.

#triple h #shawn michaels #d generation x #dx #1997 #90s #wwf #attitude era #wwf attitude #fanfiction

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dietgaymags · 4 years

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A definitive ranking of DWTS Season 29′s celebrities thus far

So I'm obsessed with Dancing with the Stars as much as the next guy. I’ve seen every season since number 11, when I was like 9 years old. But I dropped off a few seasons ago, disappointed that they really had the nerve to put the legend Lindsey Stirling on the same season as the other legend Jordan Fisher. That was not fair to anyone, because Lindsey would have wiped the floor in literally any other season.

But Season 29′s cast was released and I got excited again. About 80% of these names I was not only familiar with, but were people I enjoyed for some reason or another. Skai Jackson, Nelly, Johnny Weir, AJ McLean, Nev Schulman, Carole Baskin, Justina Machado, Monica Aldama, and the list just goes on. They really said “we need to get young people back into the show.” And they did. I was hooked. And though Len is gone and Carrie Ann is going some sort of which way with her votes (we don’t talk about it), I’ve watched every episode with bright eyes and so much excitement. We have some good dancers this season. And some bad ones. But mostly good. So here’s my definitive ranking of this season’s stars (and, by extension, pros). And if you don’t agree, that’s fine. I am simply a nineteen-year-old girl who likes to watch ballroom dancing.

NUMBER 15: CAROLE MF BASKIN AND PASHA PASHKOV

Besides the moral obligations to not allow a murderer to appear on the show, I think DWTS did a good job trying to rope people in by bringing her on. When the cast list was released, my jaw dropped because I knew she was going home first and I wanted to be there to see it.

And somehow, she did not... go home first? She made it another episode? While I’m sure it was a ploy to keep people interested in the show so they didn’t watch the premiere and drop off, Carole Baskin is sure to go down in DWTS history as one of the worst competitors. Her highest score was a 16, sure, but her lowest was an 11. We’re treading Master P territory. And I had a full traumatic episode watching her in a lion-esque unitard. Fuck, I needed to bleach every orifice on my body. (Overall Rating: 1 dead husband/10)

NUMBER 14: CHARLES OAKLEY & EMMA SLATER

You cannot tell me this man isn’t having the most fun he’s had in a minute. He was another easy-to-spot early elimination, but I actually enjoyed watching him to some degree. Emma danced circles around him, but you could really tell he was trying his damnedest and I appreciate it. And his performances didn’t strike cold, dead fear into my heart like other people.

He also got the same average score as Carole over the first two episodes, but one of those was NOT an 11. Slightly better, imo, just a little less improvement than Carole---which is why Derek booted him in the first place. (Overall rating: 1.5 left feet/10)

NUMBER 13: JESSE METCALFE AND SHARNA BURGESS

Did they---did they ever dance? I literally don’t remember anything other than that Newsies dance, which I have to say I particularly enjoyed. It might be because I like Newsies. It might be because Sharna’s hair is gorgeous this season. I don’t know, but it probably wasn’t because of Jesse’s dancing.

That’s literally all I have to say. (Overall rating: 2 confused braincells/10)

NUMBER 12: CHRISHELL STAUSE AND GLEB SAVCHENKO

WOAH, she’s coming in with the hot takes! Chrishell hasn’t even been eliminated yet! And look, it’s not even Chrishell’s fault that she’s so low on the list. It really isn’t. She’s been performing, well, okay thus far. Not great, considering her highest score was a 26 on a Paso double where she literally did not even dance (look, I’m not a judge, but I would’ve given it a 21 MAYBE). She’s trying, and she seems to be really enjoying it; I absolutely adore her energy. But most of the issue here is attributed to her partner, Gleb.

His choreography is just... I don’t know... lazy. He throws himself around like a god among men and Chrishell is just there. I don’t really appreciate the pros who prefer to dance over their partners instead of with them. I don’t understand why he thinks this method will get him a mirrorball, but it’s just not gonna happen. (Overall rating: 2 measures of actual dancing/10)

NUMBER 11: ANNE HECHE AND KEO MOTSEPE

Look how happy they look! No, but seriously, they didn’t do that bad. They just had a bad week. Week 2, they had a higher average score than SIX other couples on the show, and they left with a score of 21. I legitimately think that their Disney night dance was underscored. Sure, it wasn’t wonderful, but it didn’t deserve a fifteen.

I know they had no chance to win the mirrorball, but Keo has a history of being stuck with less-than-stellar partners. Anne was not a bad match; they just had bad luck and better competition. I did love watching them, though. And Keo is beautiful, but need I say more? (Overall rating: 3.5 early elims/10)

NUMBER 10: VERNON DAVIS AND PETA MURGATROYD CHMERKOVSKIY

I honestly haven’t enjoyed Peta’s choreography since Season 22, when she and Nyle DiMarco ate up the dance floor and left not a single crumb. She and Peta were another pair where I was like, “Wait, who got eliminated? They’re still here?” The judges were right in saying Vernon had a lot of energy on stage, and look at him here. He’s big cheesin’.

They kind of existed for me is all I have to say. The only reason they’re ranked higher than Anne and Keo is because their average score was just overall better. They never scored extremely well, with their highest score being a 22, but they never did too horribly either. They were meh. (Overall rating: 4 touchdowns/10)

NUMBER 9: NELLY AND DANIELLA KARAGACH

Another hot take? Yes. I can never tell whether or not Nelly enjoys being here until he actually dances. During rehearsal, confessionals, critiques, he always looks a little embarrassed or nervous? I’m not sure. But just like Vernon and Peta, all of their dances have been kind of meh.

That’s not to put Daniella down in any sense. It’s her first season as a pro, and her abilities definitely shine through in her performance. But like I said about Gleb earlier, she has a tendency to dance over Nelly at times (see: the Freddy Krueger dance from last week). I don’t see Nelly living up to the standards the judges say he’s lived up to thus far, but that might just be my personal opinion. (Overall rating: 5 heeled sneakers/10)

NUMBER 8: MONICA ALDAMA AND VALENTIN CHMERKOVSKIY

Another surprisingly hot take. I actually really enjoyed each of Monica’s dances this season, especially since she’s someone with essentially zero dance experience. I’m still very pissy that the Ratched dance sent her home---it was one of my favorite dances of the night, and I have no clue why she only got a 22 for it (especially when Chrishell and Gleb got a 26).

Val has always been someone on the show who can take a non-dancer and genuinely make them better. This is the case with Monica. We saw so much improvement with her over the weeks. We’re getting to the part of the list where I love all of the dancers. Still, Monica and Jeannie should not have been the bottom 2 last week, but in the case between the two, it’s right that Monica was eliminated. Still, I would have loved to see her next week. (Overall rating: 6 cheer pyramids/10)

NUMBER 7: SKAI JACKSON AND ALAN BERSTEN

Sure, she got the first 10 of the season. Sure, the Chucky dance was kind of spectacular. But she’s also had the lowest score for two out of seven weeks so far. She has yet to be in the bottom, but I’m sure that’s the fans working for her. I can’t deny her talent on the dance floor, but I would argue that objectively, Skai has made the most mistakes out of everyone this season.

She’s been remarkably inconsistent over the course of the season, but when she’s good, she’s really, really good. She was my pick to win when the cast was released, but now I don’t see that happening unless the fans really come to vote on her, which I think they will. But there is no excuse for an 18 on Week 6. She can do better. I know she can. But until then, she stays in the middle of my list. (Overall rating: 6 Ms. Kiplings/10)

NUMBER 6: JEANNIE MAI AND BRANDON ARMSTRONG

To be completely honest, I had Jeannie Mai pegged as an early elimination from Week 1. But she and Brandon continue to astound me as a team. I love every single one of their dances, sad that they’ve been consistently underscored. That Hannibal Lecter paso was stunning, and the Up dance on Disney night made me tear up a little.

They’re not higher for the sole reason that others are just better. Not because I don’t love what they put out on the stage every week, but Jeannie just isn’t the strongest technically. Until they get eliminated, though, I’ll be watching with bated breath. (Overall rating: 7 hole-in-ones/10)

NUMBER 5: KAITLYN BRISTOWE AND ARTEM CHIGVENTSEV

Do I just not see what everyone else is seeing when they’re obsessing over Kaitlyn Bristowe? I mean, everything she’s done so far has been wonderful, but she’s not my favorite. Technically, it’s on point 85% of the time. and she has the second-highest point total so far in the competition, but she has yet to do a dance where I step back and think, “Wow.” That’s what puts her behind the top four.

I did not like the Cruella DeVille paso doble at all last week, but I think that was attributed to the song choice more than anything else. I have yet to be taken aback by Kaitlyn and Artem, but their work is undeniably, objectively some of the best on the show. (Overall rating: 7 roses/10)

NUMBER 4: AJ MCLEAN AND CHERYL BURKE

Now we’re at the spot on the list where if any of these guys win the mirrorball, I will be satisfied. Something about AJ is simply magnetic. He has such a kind disposition and wonderful talent on the dance floor, it’s so hard not to love him. His samba is one of my favorite dances on this season so far, and I’m genuinely concerned that he’s been underscored this whole time.

Cheryl is a mf VETERAN at this, too. She knows how to teach this man to destroy a dance floor. The energy he brings, the life he brings, the nasty footwork that he DEMOLISHES. I did not expect to love AJ as much as I do. In my opinion, the most improvement we’ve seen in a star this season. (Overall: 8.5 backstreets/10)

NUMBER 3: JUSTINA MACHADO AND SASHA FARBER

Justina is living proof that you don’t have to be as big around as my pinky finger to do ballroom dancing well. She’s easily the best female star this season, and Sasha has accentuated her talents on the dance floor without overpowering her, which I enjoy. On top of that, she looks so happy to be here, which translates heavily into her dancing.

I will say, not every dance from her has been my favorite, but there hasn’t been a single dance out of her that I haven’t liked. Her presence is so powerful and destructive that everyone needs to watch their backs. Remember, this is a sitcom mom, not a professional dancer. (Overall rating: 8.5 days at a time/10)

NUMBER 2: JOHNNY WEIR AND BRITT STEWART

I am a firm believer that Johnny and Britt should have gotten a perfect 30 on their contemporary back in Week 5. I am also a firm believer that they should have gotten a perfect 30 on their Viennese waltz last week. I am consistently blown away by Britt’s choreography every single week, and their chemistry as a pair is unlike anyone I’ve seen in the show’s history.

What I like about them so much is how much of a team they are. That really makes so much difference out on the dance floor. Their grace and style is completely unmatched, and as a first season pro, Britt is destroying some of the pros who have been here for years... Gleb. I can’t wait to see their performances every single week, and I hope they continue to dance together somehow even after the show is over. (Overall rating: 9.9 triple axels/10)

NUMBER 1: NEV SCHULMAN AND JENNA JOHNSON CHMERKOVSKIY

Hey, quick question: did you expect this? Because I definitely didn’t. Catfish has always been my guilty pleasure show to watch when I’m bored and lonely, and Nev has always been this super dorky guy, so when they announced the cast list, I was like “Oh, this is gonna be funny as hell.” Because it could only go one of two ways: 1) Nev fumbles around like a dork and goes home pretty early, or 2) he wins the mirrorball.

APPARENTLY it’s the latter. Nev surprised me, and I think everyone, with his natural talent, and Jenna is heavily playing off that in her choreography. She’s been giving him very difficult, technical work and he’s has continued to astound. With the first 30 of the season rightfully deserved, Nev is a force to be reckoned with. Like I’ve said earlier, some of the pros like to dance over their partners to hide their weaknesses. I would go so far as to argue Jenna lets him dance over her. Together, they’re an absolute wildfire, and if they continue at this pace, consider the competition already won. (Overall rating: 10 chest hairs/10)

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shealynn88 · 5 years

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TWENTY-FOUR CREAM OF THE CROP BDSM FICS!!

There are three main categories:

BDSM Alternate Universe (3): Au trope where everyone is born a dom or a sub.

Safe, Sane and Consensual (10): Mostly AUs where they have some experience in the scene and try to work through things in a healthy way. It’s not, always, because they’re them and messy and human. But these are typically on the more realistic side of things (at least the negotiation/agreement side).

Don’t Try This At Home (11) - dark, a lot of pain and bloodplay, characters handling themselves or each other in ways you probably shouldn’t put into practice..but reading them is HOT (for some of us, anyhow).

BDSM Alternate Universe: everyone is born a Dom or a Sub

all the other things by @reallyelegantsharkfish (Destiel) - Words: 8,439

Castiel is a dom at a service for unattached subs. Dean never knew being a sub didn’t have to hurt.

This is such an incredible story of kindness and healing. I can’t recommend it enough. It’s just gorgeous and sweet.

The Meaning On My Skin by @saltnhalo (Destiel) - Words: 82,787

Castiel despises everything about being a dom. Then he meets Dean, and begins to see there might be another way.

I love the way this weaves in the ‘born a dom’ au, insecure Cas, tattoo artist Dean, a lot of personal growth and some blazing hot, gentle BDSM.

Closer to Bound, Closer to Free by bendingsignpost (Destiel) - Words: 5,867

Sam is going far, and the country needs his leadership. So Dean holds off on what he wants to be sure nothing gets complicated. Even when he meets Cas.

This is an incredible take on the characters - the way Sam serves the greater good, the way Dean serves him. It’s an incredible take on the BDSM AU - the culture of it, the assumptions, the dynamics...it’s an incredible world built in very few words.

Safe, Sane, Consensual: trying to do their best in an imperfect world

riptides by @reallyelegantsharkfish (Destiel) - Words: 138,635

“I’m going to kiss you now.”

This is one of the most gorgeous things I’ve read in my existence. Truly. It is heartfelt, it is sweet, it is filthy, it gets into a vast number of kinks, the ups and downs of BDSM, delves into some dark and difficult character exploration, and ends up...transcendent. Read the tags, but then read the fic. You will not regret it.

Four Letter Word For Intercourse by @bendingsignpost (Destiel) - Words: 194,739

As a grease monkey turned college freshman, Dean's constantly three seconds away from being stressed out of his mind. It hardly helps that he's finally figuring out his sexuality in his thirties.

What might help with that stress is a little phone number (and a big credit card bill). If he can't figure out how to be bisexual in person, he can at least give it a go over the phone, right?

This is another one that is just...incredible. It is sweet, it is heartfelt, it is hot, it is a story of self discovery and mistaken identity and bravery, and it is a really great representation of something healthy growing out of a lot of angst and doubt.

Unsolicited by @dangerousnotbroken - (Destiel) Words: 56,348

Dean get a dick pic from a wrong number...and he cannot believe who it’s from.

Porn star Cas. Mechanic Dean. Hotness, sweetness, and a whole lotta fantastic sexy times ensue. This is just 100% fun and lovely.

Love, light me on fire by ThePornFairy (Destiel) - Words: 3,841

He took a deep breath, wanting nothing more than to turn around and forget this, forget what he was about to do, just go back to never having to deal with it ever again. Instead, he threw the heavy object in his hand on the table before crossing his arms and all but glaring at his husband, whose smile disappeared as his eyes narrowed.

Incredible character exploration and seeing Dean as a masochist with self esteem issues is so true and the way Cas takes care of him is so lovely. It’s hurt/comfort, S/M style.

Kinetics by kittenbot (Destiel) - Words: 106,440

Set in the modern world without the supernatural, Dean is a sculptor and Castiel is a photographer. Castiel is also a Dom and Bakushi—an expert that ties people up in the traditional Japanese way; his specialty is suspension ties. Cas wants to show Dean how wonderful submission can be and he’s absolutely dying to tie Dean up and suspend him. Dean wants to let him.

A long, plotty, character exploration and BDSM scene exploration sort of fic. It will break your heart and heal you. I love this one so much.

Aesthetics in Autoerotica by @relucant (Destiel) - Words: 8,260(+)

Cas is a photography student doing an erotic shoot, Dean is a student who needs money and does some modeling on the side. It ends up being more than either of them expected.

This is incredibly hot and steamy and lovely - it has many of your kinky needs, and the BDSM starts slowly but there are gorgeous rope scenes and soft Dom!Cas is just delicious.

I Wanna Get Outside (Of Me) by emwebb17 (Destiel) - Words: 142,717

Castiel is a diagnosed OCD suffering from PTSD and agoraphobia, mysophobia, and dystychiphobia. The only outlet that’s been helpful is for him to have control over a sub. Dean is the novice submissive who may be his last hope.

This is lovely. It deals with some hard things, so read the tags and be ready for some emotional times, but it is beautifully handled, the character development is fantastic and the hotness is off the scales.

Cloud Nine by Ltleflrt (Destiel) - Words: 2,254

Alpha Cas is a sub, and his Omega is happy to take him apart when he needs it.

Some gorgeous role reversal A/B/O fic.

Send Me Thorns by nhpw (Destiel) - Words: 34,297

Castiel is an experienced masochist submissive whose first meeting with Dean doesn’t go well. But when they end up working together, Cas is forced to consider that there’s more to Dean than he’d realized.

An animal shelter, a masochist, an idiot with a dash of romance and insecurity - this is so lovely in so many ways. It’s sweet and hot and plotty and wonderful.

Russian to the Altar by @malmuses (Destiel) - Words: 144258

It turned out that Castiel was a Russian erotic novelist in need of a ticket to America, and Dean… well, Dean was a last resort.

Picture, if you will, Cas with a Russian accent, Dean baking cooking and cakes, the two of them married and having not a damn clue what to do with each other, except maybe crush from afar. Until they start having a D/s relationships as friends, which of COURSE isn’t how either of them feel. Slow burn, but with lots of sex, funny jokes, hot hot hot D/s scenes, a lot of desire to bash them both over the head, and then an ending that makes it all worth it. So good.

Don’t Try This At Home: it may not be healthy but it’s hot

Countin' One Two Three by Minxchester (ComeAlongPond14) (Dean/Cas/Sam/Gabriel+) - Words: 7,963

AU in which Sam and Dean Winchester are not relatively moral hunters who travel around saving people, but are instead road-tripping, bank-robbing, diner-dining rogues with nothing but their car, a slightly-too-intimate sibling relationship, and a passion for double-teaming cute waiters.

This is basically just a smutfest. If you’re looking for Wincest, it takes a very long time to get there, but it does happen. if you’re looking for WinCasWin, there’s plenty of that to soothe you before you get to any real brotherly sexy times. This is unabashed porn, and it is on FIRE.

Blind Date by @hazeldomain (Wincest) - Words: 1,489

Sam finds out Dean has a kink for anonymous gang bangs, and takes advantage of that to feed a kink of his own...

Some hot wincest pwp. Nothing more to say, it’s just smokin’. Non-con, officially, but ultimately desired.

All Inclusive K!ink by Amazonia_8 (WinCasWin) - Words: 29,552

Castiel has never been in a BDSM relationship, but he’s ready to fully submerge himself in the lifestyle. Dean has been a dom for a long time, but Cas is something entirely new and irresistable.

The second story in this series is my favorite, but this entire thing is just out of control hotness. Sub slave Cas, experienced Doms Dean and Sam. I love this take on the brothers, and on Cas, and the way it shows them working through their insecurities and unwillingness to communicate in order to help them develop a healthier relationship. Sam is brilliant and insightful and dark. Dean is sweet and thoughtful and a well meaning mess. Cas is inexperienced and stubborn, but he knows what he wants. This is definitely a go-to for me!

SextersAnon.com by @unforth (Destiel) - Words: 16,739

SextersAnon.com, is a site that helps like-minded individuals find each other for anonymous sexting. Dean and Cas have no idea what they’re getting themselves into when they match up!

This and it’s sequel Offline are just incredible. It is incredibly emotional and goes into a lot of difficult trauma and backstory. But it is absolutely incredible. Dean is a sadist, Cas is a masochist and they are a PERFECT match...if only they can get through all the baggage, history and fears that keep them apart. Grab a tissue box and have a friend available for comfort, and then go read this fic!!! (Happy ending, just a rough time getting there.)

Dirty Laundry by vipjuly (Destiel) - Words: 28,566

Dr. Castiel Novak is a leading name in the mental health community. When Dean Winchester, self-proclaimed Golden Gardens killer, lies down on his couch for the first time, Castiel feels it. Dean is exactly who he says he is.

Aw, yeah. That’s some quality murder husband fic, right there. This is supremely written dark destiel, and I am HERE FOR IT. The push/pull of it is very Hannibal-esque...it’s just lovely, dark and deep and stunning in the best ways.

Ancient Cultivars by @wingstocarryon (Sastiel) - Words: 7063

Castiel cries for the first time, and Sam doesn’t know what to do. He just does what he can.

This is such a deep and heartbreaking and beautiful exploration of Sam and Cas, on the same and opposite sides of the same trauma. It’s panic attacks and feeling at home and using pain to find a way back...it’s stunning and I can’t say enough about it.

Orpheus by sysrae (Destiel) - Words: 84,007

Dean keeps going back because he thinks he deserves what they give him. But when Castiel picks him up, it’s different. And it’s just the beginning.

Long, plotty, thought provoking AU exploration of Alistair and Dean and the aftermath of that. how Cas comes in not understanding any of it, but treating Dean kindly because that’s the way he is, and it’s hard and also needed so deeply. This is another one that’s just stunning and hard but so worth while.

Willing by @chiisana-sukima (Wincest) - Words: 13,466

After expelling Gadreel, Sam kills himself to close the Gates of Hell. Dean copes poorly alone, and then they cope poorly together.

The atmosphere of this fic is incredible - gritty, noir desaturated feeling to it. It’s subtle and thought provoking and you see Dean serve in a way he really doesn’t in canon, but the growth of it, the way he gets there, is utterly believable and perfect. This is absolutely one of my favorites of all time.

hurt me because you love me by blamethemusk (Sastiel) - Words: 4,374

Sam is a masochist. Castiel is not a sadist, but he can adapt.

Castiel serving the Winchesters in difficult ways is probably one of my favorite things. Here, Castiel gives Sam the pain he needs because no one else can. This is so dark and painful and so full of love. I can’t explain it. If you like some loving S/M, I cannot recommend it highly enough.

Rise Above It by @silver9mm (Destiel, Wincestiel) - Words: 10,692

Cas wants to show Dean that, despite what he did in Hell, he’s not a monster. Dean disagrees.

This is the darkest, hardest fic I’ve ever loved. Definitely heed the tags. BUT, it’s also gorgeous and full of an incredibly selfless love, and it has such strong characterization and exploration of motives and mindsets...truly a masterpiece.

Dollars & Cents by ekbe_vile (Destiel) - Words: 4,602

Dean has a taste for causing pain, and Cas takes it.

Heartbreaking, this one. But again, so much exploration of character in the giving and receiving of pain. There are threads of repentance and horror and challenges of self acceptance. So much packed into so few words.

Been Down So Long by BlindSwandive (Wincest) - Words: 14,404

Sam’s addicted to demon blood and Dean is willing to do absolutely anything to get him over it.

Dark, dark, dark. Non-con all the way. Sam needs demon blood and it’s making Dean crazy. This is so well done - you can see the downward spiral for them both. Sam is an unreliable narrator while experiencing withdrawal; Dean is coming unraveled trying to take care of an unwilling Sam. Chilling but gorgeous. If you like bloodplay/blood-drinking, this is the fic for you.

#shearecsfic

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inevitably-johnlocked · 4 years

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hello! i hope you have a happy holidays!! just a question: do you know any good crossover fics? :0 thanks so much! 🥰

Hi Nonny!!

Thank you! My holiday season was great <3 Sorry for the delay on the reply, but your ask was a great one because I’ve wanted to do an update list to my “movies and books” list, so I’m updating it to just “crossovers” because I have more to add and that makes me happy!!

This list ended up getting split across two asks, so for this one, this list is all my bookmarked fics. A part 1.5 with my MFL’s is coming shortly with another ask, and I ask y’all hold off to add your own suggestions to that list instead, please :) Thank you!

CROSSOVERS and FUSIONS (Feb 2021) Pt. 1