underoooos

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[After Peter goes against Tony's orders in a mission] Steve: Tony stop being so mad at Peter! You know he would throw himself in front of a car for you Tony: He would throw himself in front of a car for fun

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Sam: Why is Peter duct-taped to the ceiling? Bucky: Consequences. Peter: It was a joke! Bucky: So is your judgment.

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Peter: Sometimes I think about how weird it is that your heart runs on a mini reactor. Tony: Hmm Tony: Sometimes I think about how weird it is that you run on fruit snacks and guilt.

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The Avengers: How does it feel to be Peter's father figure and someone he looks up to?

Tony : It's exhausting. Do you know how hard it is to keep that kid alive? *turns to look at Peter*

Peter: *trying to iron a wrinkle out of a shirt sleeve while still wearing it*

Peter: *burns himself, screams and drops the iron on his foot*

Peter: *screams louder*

Tony : *looks back at the Avengers*

Tony : It's like he wants to die.

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The Avengers: What's the definition of "innocent"?

Tony, pointing at Peter and using Peter's hand to wave at them: Right here!

Peter: *grimaces as the Avengers awkwardly wave back*

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I'm losing my shit

https://twitter.com/mjspidxy/status/1582680037194895361?t=maS2N3W08_br-G5wupNNmA&s=19

😂😂😂😂😂

That's a good one. 😂🤣😂

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Some girl: Are you single? Peter : Nah Peter : I'm album

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So usually when I follow someone I go through all their work and stories and my friend caught me doing it on your blog and like she said it was creepy and it could give off Stalker vibes, but like I don't think so. So I'm just letting you know that if you see I liked a whole bunch of your past posts please know that I'm just going through your truly amazing work and im not stalking you <3

To me it only gives off good vibes so thank you <3

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May : So you're like the therapist for the whole team?

Peter : Mmm kinda

May : Who's your therapist then?

Peter, holding up a small pebble : Well I talk to this rock sometimes

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Peter : How long are you gonna be mad at me?

Tony :

Tony : Ten minutes.

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Peter : FIGHT ME!!

Tony : Kid stop telling everyone to fight you, look how small you are

Peter : My height doesn't effect my ability to snap someone's neck in 6 different ways! INCLUDING YOURS!

Tony : You can't even reach my neck

Peter : Wanna bet? I see my step stool just a foot away, DO NOT MAKE ME USE IT!

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Tony : Kid did you eat all the powdered sugar donuts? Peter: *mouth full of donuts* Um. No? Tony : Then what's all that on your pants Peter: Peter: That's cocaine

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Tony : Don't you dare.

Peter: *smiles*

Tony : I swear to god

Peter: *smiles wider*

Tony : Please don't.

Peter: *puppy dog eyes*

Tony : *laughs* Alright you're too adorable you're forgiven this time

Rest of the Avengers: Oh COME ON! EVERY TIME!

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Tony : Where are you? Peter: My limit. I'm at my limit. Tony : Peter: Tony : I meant your location

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Ah indeed

nO WAIT- 

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Peter: If Harley and I were drowning who would you save? Tony : You two can't swim? Peter: It's a hypothetical question, Mr. Stark! Who would you save? Tony : *scoffing* My time and effort