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MY PERCY JACKSON FIC RECS!✨

Stranded

saltedriceball (tealvneu)

Summary:

After sacrificing himself to save Apollo, Meg, and Piper from Caligula, Jason is transported to Ancient Greece, in an alternate universe where demigods are extremely rare due to the sheer difficulty of a successful demigod pregnancy. The exact location and time period he's been transported to? Smack in the middle of The Odyssey on Odysseus' ship, right before the crew lands on Helios' island. And when Zeus arrives to cast judgement, he comes face-to-face with a demigod, young and mortal and inexplicably, undeniably his. Jason thinks that Zeus couldn't care less about him. Unfortunately for him, he's about to be proven very, very wrong.

pjo x epic

Aka Jason travels back in time to EPIC where demigods are rare (ToA spoilers)

status: 1/2 incomplete

my opinion: This had a wonderful start extremely fun read!

The Ascension of Percy Jackson ( as brought to you by Poseidon)

breakerfaith

Summary:

Poseidon looks at Percy and decides " no you don't get to die" and focuses on turning Percy into a god.

Incomplete

percabeth

my opinion: One of my favourite deity Percy fics and it has a lot of focus on side characters too with really different dynamics then in canon

Bull Horns and Webbed Hands

Mintyy_Fresh

Summary:

Ever since Percy became an instructor at camp, he knew first hand how stressful it was to be in charge of the health and safety of over a hundred demigods. Which was why he offered to travel to Olympus in Chiron's place to give the Olympians the monthly status report for camp. All he'd wanted to do was give Chiron the day off. He hadn't planned on anything exciting happening. He certainly hadn't planned on accidentally adopting the Ophiotaurus while he was there. As usual, nothing ever goes as planned for Percy Jackson.

incomplete - hasn’t updated since December

My opinion: I didn’t know how much I needed a Bessie & Percy fic until this fic popped up

The Sun's Miracle

Lovemuffin01

Summary:

Will Solace went to sleep one night and woke up in Ancient Greece having become a god overnight...which Will can learn to accept because otherwise he'll go insane. Now if only his father would stop guarding him like a dragon guards his hoard of gold. Apollo held his dying lover in his arms and from his lover's blood and his own tears a child emerged. Apollo will protect his new miracle whatever the cost, no matter the sacrifice. Or Will Solace is flung back to Ancient Greece as a newborn god who the world believes to be the son of Apollo and Hyacinth

Incomplete - hasn’t updated in almost a year yet I still cling on to it

My opinion: I have a type and that type is Time Travel a really unique and fun idea of this trope!

Ask if you want more or something specific!

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oddly specific

does anyone have any recommendations for REALLY specific fics? Something like X character goes into a Au verse? Another example would be, Tim drake goes to a universe where everyone has wings but he has no wings.

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quickest sketch I have ever done

I'm letting Tumblr decide my name cuz I keep bouncing between them

Resolve this for me

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NOTICE: As more and more fanfic writers are using generative AI for their works (you uncreative dweebs), I hereby swear on everything I hold dear that I have not and will NEVER use generative AI in ANY of my written work. Everything I post will be organically and creatively my own.

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Twist that knife why don’t you

DpxDc #19

Call of the void.

(shorter than my usual, but a funny thought. Also, little drawing at the end)

Something that Danny wanted to explore together with space, was the ocean.

The thing is: both were terrifying to him, but the thrill of the unknown, the immense voids that nature was capable of...

It was absolutely, existentially dreadful.

He loved it!

He wasn't really afraid of getting lost if he tried to take a stroll around, since he could quickly reach land, so why not try?

It wasn't really his fault that he let himself go!

Danny didn't even realize it was happening, but ectoplasm is a substance that tends to fill space. Between molecules, between atoms, it's everywhere, it's the ambient.

Long story short, he only found out that he had grown to the size of Godzilla when he was casually passing by Atlantis.

He hadn't even noticed the underwater city until he heard screaming coming from below...

Something about a leviathan?

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COLOURS MAN COLOURS

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I came across the AU idea that Dick Grayson is Richard Parker, and thus, Peter Parker's biological father. There are a few fics where Peter dimension travels to the DC universe and gets to meet his dead father. It is a fun idea, but I have different one.

AU where Peter dimension travels to the DC universe, and the batfam realizes that he is Dick's son, but rather than think he is from another universe, they all come to the conclusion that he is from the future.

It makes sense, after all, the rules of time travel basically boil down to 'don't change anything.' So when Peter is avoiding them and "pretending" not to know them, they just think he is following the rules. (He isn't even really avoiding them, he just has no idea who they are.)

You know how once you have an idea in your head, it take a lot of convince you that your wrong? Same idea here, they are so convinced of their idea that all new info ends up making them surer. Confirmation bias.

So Peter is trying to find a way home while the batfam tries to subtly help him without getting involved in time travel. Hijinks ensue.

Peter once mentions his love of photography and how he used to take pictures of heroes for a newspaper. Everyone looks at Tim and thinks, 'Gee I wonder where he picked up that hobby.'

At one point Peter pulls an assassin move, and Damian is like, 'I taught him that for sure.' (In reality Peter just trained with Natasha and Bucky before.)

When dealing with some issue Peter says something like, "I know a guy with some green angry problems and he taught me a lot about staying calm when mad." Everyone looks at Jason??? (He just picked up some meditation advice from Bruce Banner)

At some point he goes to the manor and everyone is like, 'Hah! More proof! He knows his way around the building!' He doesn't know his way around, his spider sense just lead him to where people are and kept him from getting lost.

He mentions Black Cat once, and everyone comes to the "totally logical" conclusion that Catwoman had a daughter, and that Peter and Felicia also have a weird almost dating thing going on.

Peter has been forced to go to some fancy events with Tony before so he knows how to act at rich people galas, which of course just adds fuel to the time travel theory.

Peter keeps accidentally referencing things that don't exist/didn't happen. Everyone just assumes these things didn't happen/don't exist yet.

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I like to imagine Bruce fainted the second Damian left.

the others are just standing there in disbelief while looking at their..oh god nephew???

Damian, as Robin, is about to be sacrificed to summon a Powerful Being. Except instead of a Powerful Being, a kid his age pops into existence as though he was shoved forward.

The kid looks around, startled. He's got a black eye and he's holding a length of rope, presumably what had been restraining him.

"Uh. Is. Is this the afterlife?" The kid asks, bewildered.

"...No, this is Gotham. We were trying to summon Pariah Dark?" One of the cultists answers, also confused.

"But I was being sacrificed to summon Pariah Dark?" The kid says, brows furrowed.

The cultists pause in their attempted murder of Robin and hurriedly reconvene, taking their eyes off of the kid. They're muttering about how maybe there was another cult doing a sacrifice at the same time, and things got switched up. Should they sacrifice both of the boys?

Damian, though. Damian never takes his eyes off of the new kid.

Unlike the cultists, he's not an idiot. He knows a liar when he sees one. That boy is no sacrifice.

That boy is the being they summoned.

He waits for the being to show it's true colors. And waits. And waits.

'Hurry up!' Damian mouths to it.

'I am trying!' It mouths back, motioning at it's feet where it's been wearing away the containment sigil.

'Well try faster!'

'That's not how it works!'

'How hard is it to mess up chalk?'

'Well then you come here and you do it!'

"Maybe I will," Damian spits outloud, done with this farce.

"Uh, do you two need a moment or...?"

Damian answers the cultists question by kicking her in the face as he cuts himself loose.

He will rescue both himself and the demon they dragged into this world.

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God people just suck so much

Wow, now there's a bot going around on Ao3 telling people that the "moderators" will delete works from "deprecated" fandoms and impose bans.

Fearmongering bullshit, but it's fearmongering bullshit that seems to be taking advantage of the recent spotlight series in order to trick authors into deleting their fics.

Just. Why.

What the hell does anyone get out of making these bots.

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How I imagine Shang Qinghua looks while turning towards Shen Qingqiu

SQH:

Shen Yuan is actually a cuddle bug. Had a ton of Luo Binghe body pillows back home not just for the merch reasons but because he needs something in his bed to squeeze when he's sleeping.

Since he started having weekly planning (boozing and bitching) sessions with Shang Qinghua, he sometimes accidentally sleeps over. After he's finished his paperwork and started on some of Qinghua's, sometimes the wine gets to him and he's just so sleepy. Or, sometimes, Shang Qinghua will let the other read some of the short stories he had written early on in his transmigration when fighting to not lose his mind. Shen Yuan would critique them, before harassing him to publish them anonymously.

("Oh, so you are capable of writing more than papapa trash."

"Aw, you like it?" "...it's good." 🙄)

But by the time he finished them, it would be so late, and it didn't make much sense to leave when a bed was right there. And Shang Qinghua had custom ordered goose feather pillows and blankets, which was so unlike his porcelain pillows, and Shang Qinghua himself is right there. Therefore. The man himself becomes his new object of comfort when asleep.

At first, Shang Qinghua used to just wave it off. Then he started to playfully complain and tease about how clingy Shen Yuan was in his sleep, and Shen Yuan would grumble and turn bright red and turn his back on him... only for them to wake up with Shen Yuan basically curled around the other like an octopus in the morning. And then it just became normal because, of course, they really only had each other, so like why not? It brought them both comfort and two people could totally cuddle platonically.

Before long, more than half the week, Shen Yuan was spending the night over, and some rare times, Shang Qinghua goes to the bamboo house. Shang Qinghua learns when to give up his piles of paperwork when his friend starts getting tired and to get more fucking rest himself. Otherwise, Shen Yuan will just walk in, curl up on his lap with his head resting on Shang Qinghua's shoulder, and fall asleep there.

("Really? I ordered those extra stuffed pillows for you, you know. Go to bed, I'll be done in a minute."

"Ugh, shut up, sleeping isn't the same when you're out here ordering new fighting posts for Bai Zhan Peak for the 5th time this month. I'll just wait here for you to finish."

"In my lap...? That's kinda gay--" 😏

"Qinghua."

"Shutting up and finishing the work." )

Those of An Ding Peak, being the peak that was basically the backbone of the entire sect and kept it running through sweat, blood, and some other bodily fluids, knew how to keep secrets from other peaks. You don't become a disciple there without knowing how to keep your mouth shut when outsiders are around. But between each other, whispers abound.

"I don't think Shen-shibo has left in two days," one disciple murmurs to another when they see Shen Qingqiu flouncing around yet again, ordering one of the disciples to bring some two small meals to their Shifu's rooms for a late dinner.

"Do you think they're... you know?" Another asks quietly after delivering some new contracts to their Shifu. The door to his bedroom had been slightly ajar, and through the cracks, green leaf-pattern outer robes were on the ground.

("I'm not sleeping in these, okay! You should have written in pajamas while you were busy adding in chocolate, and whatever else doesn't exist in Ancient China, to PIDW!" 😒

"Oh my god, just sleep in your inner robes, then! Better yet, borrow some of my clothes. But you're sure as fuck not sleeping naked on my silk sheets, bro!")

The disciples on Qing Jing Peak certainly notice when the bamboo hut isn't occupied for the night. At first, they just thought that their Shizun was extra silent in his house now, but once, Ming Fan had to go to Shizun for a small issue late in the evening, and he wasn't there. Nor was he there the next night, or the next. They're not sure where he is, or what he's doing, but he's always there in the morning, so they don't worry too much.

On the fourth night, Shizun was home, but Shang-shishu was also there. And... stayed there. The lights went out, and the disciples who were sent out to spy came back and reported that Shang-shishu had never left.

("He... is Shang-shishu still in there?"

"I think so. M-maybe he stayed in the extra bedroom?"

"..." 👀

"..." 👀)

The disciples eye each other and simultaneously agree to never let those outside the peak know about this. When crossing paths with A Ding disciples, there are discreet looks and nods of understanding, and they pass each other by with not a word.

(Shen Qingqiu and Shang Qinghua?)

----

One bright and sunny morning, Liu Qingge slams his way into Shang Qinghua's office. He is followed by Mu Qingfang, and Yue Qingyuan, all needing to speak with Shang Qingqua to figure out Shen Qingqiu's whereabouts. He wasn't in his bamboo hut this morning, nor was he anywhere else that he typically frequented.

Mu Qingfang because it was time for his bimonthly check-up to ensure that his treatments with Liu Qingge were progressing as they should. Yue Qingyuan due to peak matters (though, technically, he could do it on his own, but if he got to see Xiao Jiu--). Liu Qingge because the beast that he had dropped on his doorstep yesterday afternoon had yet to be removed, which was odd. And also, he had ordered new fighting posts a week ago, and usually they would have been delivered by now, which was also odd.

Wei Qingwei and Qi Qingqi also follow along because they could smell drama. And also they were a tiny bit worried about their shixiong. Whenever he disappeared for too long, it was likely that he had gotten kidnapped or poisoned. Again.

Shang Qinghua scrambles out of his bed chambers with hastily thrown-on outer robes, blurry-eyed, screaming "Whoosit!?" He barely has time to open his mouth before he is instantly bombarded with several requests, most of them pertaining to the apparent missing peak lord. Liu Qingge also asks about his fighting posts, which Shang Qinghua pretends not to hear.

"We've not seen him in a few days," Mu Qingfang says to him over the noise, with an apologetic smile for waking up his overworked shixiong. "I know you two are somewhat friends, so if you see him soon, please tell him he really needs to come to Qian Cao for his next physical."

"Wait, who's missing? Ah, please don't touch that." The last part is directed at Qi Qingqi, who is combing through his shelves. "Shen Qingqiu is apparently missing, according to this bunch," Qi Qingqi says, smirking at him. She pokes the figurine he told her not to touch. Oh well, she'll realize why he told her not to touch it soon enough.

"Shen Qingqiu? What do you mean, he's--" Shang Qinghua instantly closes his mouth, hoping that no one heard that. "I-I mean, yeah, I'll let you guys know if he stops by! No problem, will absolutely send him your way--" "What was that?" Liu Qingge narrows his eyes at him. "You were about to say something. You know where he is. Tell me."

Shang Qinghua begins to sweat immediately. "Whaaat? No, you must have heard wrong. Seriously, I'll let you guys know if I catch him. Now, if you guys can be on your way--" He starts trying to herd people out.

Unbeknownst to him, his bedroom door cracks open and a figure, eyes barely open, shuffles out and heads towards him. Wei Qingwei, idling in the office, is the first to notice the person wearing another set of An Ding Blue outer robes over soft Qing Jing Green inner ones. His jaw drops.

"Qinghua?" A soft, sleepy voice murmurs in his ear, arms circling around his waist and a head laying on his shoulder from behind. "It's too early, come back to bed." A small yawn.

Shang Qinghua can feel himself freeze with a nervous smile on his face.

Shit.

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“Congratulations B your a grandfather”

What.

what.

Bruce swears his heart stopped, his (un)dead boy was standing in front of him..holding a baby.

”Jason”

Bruce couldn’t handle it anymore after he spoke he fainted soon after

Red Hood enters Fatherhood

DP x DC Prompt

Jason had just arrived back into Gotham after he left the League of Assassins. He's ready to start his plans to get revenge on Bruce.

And then he hears a baby crying in an alleyway in Crime Alley. He initially went to the alleyway to bring the baby to a place that would take care of them. But as soon as he set eyes on the baby in the partially closed box in the alleyway, something in him had slightly changed.

At first, Jason kept the baby in his most secure safe house, not trusting anyone. Even his own loyal lieutenants weren't trusted enough to look after the baby boy he found in that alleyway.

Time went on, and the Red Hood gang was growing, but Red Hood himself wasn't as violent as when he first arrived. He even rethought his plan to attack Robin in Titans Tower and decided against it.

Now, Jason is on top of the GCPD building, waiting by the lit bat signal for Batman to come, as he's about to reveal not only his identity to Bruce, but that Bruce is a grandfather now.

Elsewhere, the Ghost of Time watches his reborn King live another life. His King had lost everything, and to prevent the collapse of the Timelines, his King had to be reborn, but this time, the Ghost of Time would alter the fates of others as well by placing his King near Red Hoods beginning years as a crime lord.

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Dick is Peter’s Biological Parent

Shadows of Yesterday

Barefoot_mouse

Summary:

“Dick...” Right. He needed to focus. This couldn’t wait. “What’s wrong, Little Wing?” Dick’s tone softened, as if sensing that Jason was teetering on the edge. He always knew. Always could feel it from a mile away. “Dick, I think… I think you have a son.” Peter felt himself falling into the abyss, a faint panic creeping in. He let his eyelids close, surrendering to the darkness. His heartbeat slowed, and an eerie calmness washed over his thoughts. The last image that flickered through his mind was May’s lifeless eyes. Peter hoped he wouldn’t wake up again.

Incomplete

my opinion: Dick is being a protective parent a very fun read!

Waking Up In A Fish Bowl

Rainbowfish3

Summary:

We all make mistakes, right? We learn from them and they lead us on a path for better or for worse. For Peter, his big mistake lead him to waking up at the hospital as a baby. Where it all starts for this series.

One-shot and is a part of a series

my opinion: Absolutely adorable I have reread this multiple times

A Brand New Future...

AvacadoFields

Summary:

Suddenly waking up in an unknown city was weird, especially considering he doesn't exist anywhere. What was even weirder were the vigilantes following him thinking he was from the future? And someone's kid? Huh? OR Peter wakes up in Gotham and everyone thinks he's a certain someone's kid from the future.

Incomplete

my opinion: If your gonna read any of this trope then let it be this one my favourite take on it

My baby, my baby (you're my baby, say it to me)

sstar2000

Summary:

In the chaos of Thanos' snap, Peter Parker is reduced to golden dust, and his soul is snagged by the Soul Stone. Torn from his world, he's hurled into another universe and reincarnated as his parent's son yet again. And Peter finally has a chance to have a normal life.... hopefully. But why does it seem like every single god-damn hero he meets is obsessed with him? And why is one of those heroes his dad?   Tell your baby that I’m your baby

incomplete

my opinion: 50k words of pure..joy yep! Joy :)

I didn’t add some of the more popular ones in this rec list because they would be easy to find

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Favourite Batman fics!

These are the ones I have bookmarked so they are all incompletec

https://archiveofourown.org/works/49130503/chapters/123956119

Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Dust (filling up my coffee cup)

LilaVaporizer9000

There is occasionally a certain point one reaches during the attempt to attain a goal where one decides that the goal is just not worth it.

Unfortunately, this also often coincides with being at a point in the attainment of that goal where it’s too damn late and you’re just gonna have to suck it up, buttercup, and get your shit together and do it anyway.

Tim is pretty sure this shit is absolutely not worth it, but it’s too late now and even if it wasn’t, Mama ain’t raise no fuckin’ quitter

Or:

Tim’s quest to bring Bruce back from his Time-Travel-Super-Vacation goes horribly topsy-turvey when Ra's takes a more pro-active approach to keeping Tim prisoner, and he ends up in an alternate universe where he never existed, and everybody is disorientingly well-adjusted and weirdly obsessed with his “wellness”, whatever that means.

Tim hates mystical artifacts.

(Alternate universe Better Batfam trope)

my opinion: I absolutely love how feral Tim is in this one

little menace

https://archiveofourown.org/works/48017905/chapters/121072261

InkpotSprite

Summary:

"Did a two year old just outrun you?" Jason asked, wanting to make sure he wasn't hallucinating. Bruce clenched his jaw. "I didn't want to hurt him." He growled. "Liar!" Tim piped up from under the desk. Jason was starting to like this version of his successor. - Tim gets turned into a toddler. He makes that everybody's problem.

My opinion: Aka where Tim abuses his powers as a child(he is also feral lmao)

CROSSOVERS

A Brand New Future...

https://archiveofourown.org/works/62679883/chapters/160458670

AvacadoFields

Summary:

Suddenly waking up in an unknown city was weird, especially considering he doesn't exist anywhere. What was even weirder were the vigilantes following him thinking he was from the future? And someone's kid? Huh? OR Peter wakes up in Gotham and everyone thinks he's a certain someone's kid from the future.

my opinion: Probably just my favourite spider man x dc crossover in general honestly

Who You Gonna Call?

jaemyun

Summary:

In freshman year of high school, Danny pulled away from his friends without explanation. At sixteen, he disappeared. Sam and Tucker presumed him dead. His parents insisted he was taken by ghosts. As young adults, they run into him in Gotham, of all places. It's a stroke of luck that brings their best friend back to them. If only it was that easy for the Bats to find the god damn engineer that's been running circles around them while they try to track him down. Tim's not sure what he'll do first when he finally finds the brilliant bastard - kiss him or punch his teeth in.

my opinion: I laughed so hard while reading this(it’s Tim x Danny btw)

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Feel free to ask for fic recs for any of these fandoms or if you need help finding a fic🩵

Fandoms

Genshin

pjo

batman

dp

mxtx works

Marvel

sbg

hp

bsd

crk

jjk

hxh

naruto

httyd

RotG

crossovers between any of these

Most likely won’t have recs for these(little specific)

No cape AU

no magic

modern

what I won’t do

Child SA

explict SA

incest ships/problemic ships

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I’m so down for this idea

Effective immediately, the country of Australia grants denizens of the Infinite Realms Australian Citizenship.

This happens after the GIW becomes internationally known, and Australia, sensing a chance to be both funny and also possibly create a political relationship, makes efforts to absorb the Infinite Realms as an Australian territory.

This also means that Australians are illegal in America and fall under the Anti-Ecto Acts.

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Absolutely perfect

What would this ship be called. Dead spider? Sure fuck it we can place this next to dead tired and red spider

DP X Marvel #8

By day, Danny Fenton was Midtown High’s hottest disaster. He was the Stark STEM Scholar—one of only three in the country—famously discovered after winning some obscure international quantum physics competition at age sixteen and allegedly giving a presentation that made Tony Stark laugh, cry, and threaten to adopt him in the same breath.

The problem was that Danny had no clue he was hot.

Like, he genuinely didn’t know. He thought people stared at him because of his weird vibe or maybe because he once muttered “parallel dimension colonoscopy” during a psych quiz and the rumor never died. He figured the occasional lingering looks were because people thought he was gonna go feral and try to bite someone (which was fair). He wore hoodies three sizes too big, drank energy drinks like water, mumbled through conversations, and ducked away from people like a scared little gremlin.

Meanwhile, the rest of Midtown was losing its mind over him.

In particular Peter Parker was losing his goddamn mind over him.

It started innocent enough. Peter had just been minding his business, doing his whole friendly-neighborhood-academically-overachieving schtick, when in walked him—Danny Fenton, with a bag slung over his shoulder, silver earrings glinting in the light like a warning sign (courtesy of Sam, who declared, “If you’re gonna be mysterious and broody, at least be aesthetically consistent.”) His hoodie looked like it had a body count. His cheekbones could slice vibranium. His eyes were dead, like truly void-of-soul dead, and Peter’s first thought wasn’t even “oh, new kid.” It was “I want him to step on me.”

Peter, poor, unsuspecting Peter, had his first-ever sexual panic as Danny plopped down in the seat next to Peter and promptly fell asleep face-first on the desk with a muttered, “If I die during lecture, bury me in a black hole.”

He was in real time was realizing he was a bisexual disaster. Danny didn’t notice. Because of course he didn’t. He just blinked at Peter like he couldn’t tell if he was real, offered a crooked half-smile, and then walked away like he hadn’t just lit Peter’s soul on fire and then pissed on the ashes.

Every day since had been a goddamn trial.

Peter had spent the first week internally screaming.

The second week, he started writing hate poetry. By the third, he was doodling “P. Parker-Fenton” in the corners of his calculus notes like a 12-year-old girl.

“Dude,” Ned had said, catching him mid-sketch. “You’re literally Spider-Man. Act like it.”

Peter flipped him off with the enthusiasm of someone spiraling.

See, Danny was not just hot. He was dangerously hot. Apocalyptically hot. End-of-days, angels-weeping-in-the-streets hot. But it was more than that—Danny had this vibe, like he could kill you or cry on you or accidentally invent interdimensional travel with a paperclip and a Diet Coke. He muttered equations under his breath, got into passive-aggressive debates with teachers, and once fixed the lab’s particle accelerator by kicking it.

And Peter couldn’t look away. Not that he was the only one.

The kicker, the absolute cherry on top of the chaos sundae? Everyone thought Danny and Black Cat had dated. The way Danny would scowl, rant, and complain like he was personally offended by Black Cat’s existence? Peak scorned lover energy.

“He thinks he’s slick, but he’s just a glorified stripper with daddy issues and too many backflips,” Danny once said in class and the teacher had to excuse herself.

“I swear I’m gonna develop a neurotoxin specifically to neutralize dumbass vigilantes with cat kinks,”

Everyone assumed Black Cat dumped him.

Peter, in his infinite genius, thought: oh my god, Danny’s still not over him.

Peter had almost passed out. Because here was the thing: he was Spider-Man. And Black Cat was his worst problem since midterms. He had arrived like a menace out of hell and a bisexual’s fever dream: black skintight tech suit (developed by who-the-fuck-knows), long white hair, with a domino mask and toxic green eyes, and with an ass so perfect Peter couldn’t even swing straight half the time.

Seriously. There’d be villains throwing grenades, and Peter would be getting motorboated by thighs. There was groping. There was flirting. There was one time Black Cat bit his ear and whispered, “Miss me, pretty boy?” and Peter crashed into a billboard.

He’d tried everything. He webbed Black Cat’s legs. Black Cat purred and called him “kinky.” He yelled. Black Cat called it “foreplay.” He threatened to arrest him. Black Cat licked his cheek and said, “Book me, officer.”

Peter had screamed into his pillow for three hours.

It wasn’t even just the flirting. Black Cat had the most obscene agility Peter had ever seen. He moved like he was born in zero gravity. Feline, fluid, and just a little too dramatic, like he knew exactly how good he looked vaulting off rooftops with his ass perfectly lit by the moonlight.

Peter hated him.

He also maybe wanted to kiss him until his lungs gave out.

Worse yet? Peter was starting to like the bastard. His timing was always perfect. His gadgets were weirdly high-tech. He had a talent for saving people and then disappearing with a little salute and a wink that made Peter’s skin itch.

And then there was that kiss.

One week ago. Midtown Bank. Hostage situation. They cleared the building together, Peter bleeding, dazed, and vibrating with adrenaline.

Black Cat had grabbed his face—grabbed his face—and said, “You’re my favorite arachnid, you know that?” and kissed him full on the mouth, through the mask.

Peter hadn’t spoken a full sentence since.

Meanwhile, Danny was in class the next day, legs crossed, sipping a disgusting Monster-Latte hybrid, and saying, “What kind of vigilante triple flips over a fire hydrant for no reason? Just run, you overdramatic bastard.”

Peter, in a cold sweat, nodded and said “yeah totally” in the voice of someone whose soul had left his body.

And Danny. Danny had no idea.

Because Danny was the goddamn Black Cat.

He hadn’t meant to become a vigilante again. The plan had been normalcy. New town, new school, no more ghost crap. He was gonna do his best, keep his grades up, pretend he was just some regular nerd with caffeine addiction and unresolved trauma.

Then a ghost tried to possess the mayor.

So. Yeah.

Ghosts were still following him. And New York didn’t have a Phantom. It had Spider-Man, sure, but Spider-Man didn’t fight intangible poltergeists or ancient Babylonian curses riding the 6 train.

Danny had no choice.

He did not name himself. He wanted to be called Specter. Or Eclipse. Something cool and ominous.

But no. Someone caught a blurry photo of his suit and labeled it Black Cat, and the media ran with it. Because of course they did.

“What part of me says feline?!” Danny groaned, head in his hands.

“You land on your feet,” Jazz offered.

“You hissed at a reporter once,” Sam added.

“Your thighs jiggle like a cat when you run,” Tucker said while texting.

“Fuck it,” he muttered, peeling into his skin-tight tech suit. “Let’s lean into the bit.”

He redesigned his suit. Added some claws. Built in some stealth mods. Accidentally made it a little too form-fitting. Like. A lot. And took notes from DC comics’ Selina Kyle’s Catwoman.

Jazz called it pornographic. Sam said it was camp. Tucker just sent a picture of the suit’s ass shot and wrote “God is testing me.”

But it worked. People were scared of him. Or thirsty. Usually both. And if Spider-Man wanted to play, then Danny was gonna play.

He didn’t expect Spider-Man to be this hot, though.

Danny had zero intentions of flirting with him at first. But then Spider-Man showed up with that stupid voice, that stupid righteous attitude, that stupid perfect thighs, and Danny’s brain short-circuited. The sarcasm kicked in. The smirks. The shameless groping.

And then he kissed him. Because why not? No one would know.

Except now he couldn’t stop thinking about it.

Spider-Man’s breath had hitched. His hands had clutched Danny’s suit like he didn’t want to let go. His knees almost gave out. Danny had felt it.

And now he was spiraling.

Because, uh. He was also kind of in love with Peter Parker. Like. A lot. The boy was brilliant, funny, painfully kind, and so pretty it gave Danny a stomach ache. But Danny couldn’t flirt with Peter because he was Black Cat, and he couldn’t flirt with Spider-Man because he was Danny.

His life was a joke.

Because Danny had no clue. About anything.

He didn’t know Peter was Spider-Man. He didn’t know Peter was spiraling into an identity meltdown because the boy he lowkey flirted with in calc was also the boy he highkey flirted with on rooftops. He didn’t know Peter was fantasizing about both of him like some bisexual train wreck with a death wish.

While for Peter? He didn’t know what he wanted more—Danny, or Black Cat.

The nerd with the hoodie and the caffeine addiction, who muttered to himself in code and looked at equations like they personally offended him? Or the cocky, sleek, thigh-baring menace who called him “pretty boy” and kissed him mid-battle just to watch him panic?

Peter was going insane.

Every time Black Cat landed in front of him, Peter had to actively fight the urge to sniff him like a lunatic. Every time Danny leaned over his desk to scribble notes, Peter’s soul left his body.

There was no winning.

“Someday,” Danny said one night, sitting on a rooftop as Black Cat and watching the skyline, “You are gonna figure it out.”

“Figure what out?” Peter as Spider-Man said, trying not to look directly at him.

“That I’m everything you want,” Danny purred, leaning into his space. “Hot, flexible, an emotional disaster.”

“You’re—! You’re insufferable.”

“I’m irresistible.”

Peter didn’t reply. He just screamed into the void later that night, face-planted into his pillow, and prayed for mercy.

The universe, as always, ignored him.

It all started at the Stark Foundation Fall Gala. A black-tie, red-carpet, industry-defining, media-covered event hosted in the glass spire that was Stark Tower, attended by the world’s smartest people and most insufferable billionaires—and two absolute disasters masquerading as teenage geniuses.

Danny Fenton, Stark STEM Scholar and walking espresso machine, was there because Tony Stark had personally invited him (“You’re legally required to be my prodigy now, kid, don’t argue, you signed the scholarship, it’s in the fine print”), and Peter Parker was there because he was Tony’s favorite intern, which meant “emotional support goblin” and “get me coffee, Peter” in the same breath.

Danny walked in like he’d been dragged from his apartment ten minutes before the event by the ghost of Coco Chanel—because he had. Sam had done his hair, shoved him into a black velvet suit that hugged his ass and thighs a little too perfectly, slapped silver rings on all his fingers, smokey eyeliner, and threatened him with a haunted curling iron if he so much as slouched.

Peter, meanwhile, had been hyperventilating in the bathroom for fifteen minutes.

He was wearing Armani. He had been forcibly styled by Pepper Potts herself, who had told him, “If you’re going to be Tony’s emotional support intern, you need to at least look like you’re not feral.” Peter had not emotionally recovered from being spritzed with Tom Ford cologne and told he looked “delicious.”

They spotted each other across the room like the first five minutes of a YA adaptation, except one was drinking something radioactive-green from a champagne flute and the other was clutching a tray of hors d’oeuvres like a weapon.

Danny blinked. Peter blinked.

Then they both looked away so fast they might’ve given themselves whiplash.

Which would’ve been fine if that was the end of it.

But no. God had other plans.

Specifically: Tony Stark’s plans.

“Come here,” Tony hissed, grabbing both of them by the shoulders. “You two teenage disasters are going to schmooze.”

“Tony I can’t schmooze,” Danny said, panicking. “I don’t even know what schmooze means, I thought that was a cheese—”

“And I have shrimp hands!” Peter added wildly, holding up his fingers still greasy from crab rangoons. “I can’t touch people like this! I’ll be arrested!”

Tony shoved them both forward like a mother bird kicking her children out of the nest and said, “Go. Talk. Mingle. Be charming. Or I’ll adopt you both and make you brothers and then who’s crushing on who, huh?”

“WHAT—” both of them said at once, violently red in the face.

“Bye!” Tony sang, disappearing into the crowd like a chaos goblin.

Peter and Danny stood in mortified silence for a full ten seconds.

Then:

“So,” Peter said. “Uh. You look… good.”

“Thanks,” Danny muttered, tugging at his collar. “I feel like a sexy baked potato.”

“You—what.”

“Just… overheated and wrapped in velvet.”

Peter wheezed.

They started talking. Somehow it spiraled into quantum entropy, the ethics of ghost containment, and whether Tony Stark was legally allowed to name a drone “Bitch Lasagna 3.0.”

Peter was sweating. Danny was internally combusting. They were both about five seconds from proposing marriage and didn’t know it yet.

Then came the moment.

A scream. A crash.

Glass shattered. Lights flickered.

“Fucking hell,” Danny muttered, already pulling off his jacket. “Can’t have ONE normal night.”

Peter, across from him, had already vanished.

Two minutes later, Spider-Man somersaulted through the crowd and launched himself at the glowing, oozing, screaming ghost that had torn through the ceiling.

Black Cat flipped down from the opposite direction, landing like a goddamn supermodel in latex.

The crowd screamed.

Peter screamed internally.

Black Cat smirked. “Miss me, pretty boy?”

“I don’t—this is a GALA, can we not?” Spider-Man groaned, dodging ectoplasmic debris.

Black Cat laughed, cartwheeled up a wall, and started firing anti-ghost rounds from his wrist mods. The ghost shrieked. Spider-Man nearly got crushed. Black Cat saved him by grabbing his waist and yeeting them both through a portal that landed them right in—

—the rooftop garden.

Panting. Sweaty. Disheveled.

“What the FUCK was that?!” Spider-Man gasped lifting up his mask slightly from the bottom to breath.

“I didn’t summon it!” Black Cat snapped, wiping green sludge off his face. “Ghosts have no concept of social etiquette!”

Danny after wiping his face realized his domino mask fell off but it was too late to cover up again.

Peter stared at Danny’s very familiar stupidly hot face.

Danny stared at Peter’s very familiar stupidly kissable mouth.

Peter said, in a high-pitched, cracked whisper, “You’re Black Cat?!”

Danny shrieked, “YOU’RE SPIDER-MAN?!”

They both screamed at each other. Like. Loud. Very. Loudly.

Birds flew off the rooftop.

Somewhere inside the gala, a waiter dropped an entire tray of champagne flutes from sheer sympathetic psychic resonance.

“YOU—YOU’VE BEEN FLIRTING WITH ME AS A VILLAIN!” Peter yelled.

“YOU KISSED ME ON A ROOFTOP AND THEN IGNORED ME IN CALC!”

“I THOUGHT YOU WERE TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE!”

“I THOUGHT YOU WERE STRAIGHT!”

“I THOUGHT YOU WERE BLACK CAT’s EX!”

“I AM BLACK CAT!”

Peter made a noise like a microwave about to explode. “OH MY GOD. I’M IN LOVE WITH TWO PEOPLE WHO ARE ACTUALLY THE SAME PERSON.”

Danny staggered back. “I—I’m in love with YOU! But I couldn’t SAY ANYTHING because you were Spider-Man and I was Black Cat and we were ENEMIES WITH BENEFITS—”

“BENEFITS? I GOT TRAUMA.”

“I KISSED YOU! WITH TONGUE!”

“YEAH AND IT WAS AWESOME WHICH MAKES THIS WORSE!”

They both fell silent. Hyperventilating.

Danny doubled over and screamed into the floor.

Peter clutched a potted plant and whispered, “This is a hate crime.”

There was a pause.

“…You like me?” Danny asked.

“You like me?” Peter countered.

They stared.

Then they both shrieked again, because this was TOO MUCH and NEITHER of them was equipped emotionally to handle anything.

And across the rooftop, where no one had noticed, Tony Stark was standing behind a pillar, filming the whole thing.

He grinned.

“I’m gonna play this at your wedding,” he whispered to himself, tearfully, joyfully. “God, I love being me.”

[chorusofspite]

Jason from a near by rooftop: PENGUIN USE DODGE

Dick from another rooftop: SCARECROW USE FEAR GAS

meanwhile on the other side of Gotham Damian is trying to get Bane and Tim who already has a villain(firefly)

Exhausted Batman sigh

there was a point in Gotham where the nightlife dynamics got really weird because one of the batkid’s came up with the game ‘rogue Pokémon’ where whenever there was a multiple-rogue outbreak they would all split up and find a rogue to choose as their own, and then while fighting them they’d subtly heard them towards one of the other batkids and their chosen rogue, and then they’d manipulate the rogues into fighting each other while they stood to the side and yelled fighting techniques like Pokémon trainers, and eventually the rogues started teaming up with Batman to make them stop playing it because it was making them feel objectified and demeaned.

the game came to a natural conclusion when the Joker broke out specifically because he thought it would be fun to be one of the Pokémon used by the batkids, except when he made himself known to Red Hood Jason just shot him point blank in the skull and said it was the rogue Pokémon equivalent of using a masterball on him.

the batkids are banned from creating their own games.