deadly-writing-urges
deadly-writing-urges
Depths of Despair
43 posts
What I can't bare to say out loud 🗡️
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deadly-writing-urges · 10 days ago
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I am selfish, because for so long I wasn't. Neglect for myself filled my days and guilt for not contributing more kept me awake at night.
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deadly-writing-urges · 1 month ago
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I hope in our next lives that you are not a mother. That you paint and create away from man where no one disturbs your peace.
In mine, I'll sew and knit to wrap myself in all the warmth you couldn't give me. I'll imagine they're your arms, but not resent you for your absence.
Our lives will flow without the trauma and it will no longer drain us to simply be awake.
I hope that someone loves you, more than I would ever be able to offer, because that's what's missing. You soaked up all the anger to the point of dripping, leaving me to be your drain.
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deadly-writing-urges · 1 month ago
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deadly-writing-urges · 2 months ago
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Why do you fear me? I am you, we are one. No matter how many times you think, attempt or contemplate, I will not let you go. Although I long for death, self preservation remains, like a parasite, forever holding on. I feed on your despair and give you more life, this is your purgatory.
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deadly-writing-urges · 3 months ago
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Look at you, still trying to drown me in self pity. You will not take me, I am still afloat, still swimming and grasping the waves that crash. The water that splashes my ears will not deter my ventures.
As long as I breathe, I live.
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deadly-writing-urges · 3 months ago
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deadly-writing-urges · 3 months ago
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"Hot Summer nights mid July..."
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deadly-writing-urges · 4 months ago
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Trigger Warning: Blood and Gore
Nesta didn’t seem to care as she bent over. As she took up his fallen head and lifted it. Lifted it in the air and stared at it—into Hybern’s dead eyes, his gaping mouth.
She did not smile. She only stared and stared and stared.
Savage. Unyielding. Brutal.
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art: court_of_sketches [instagram]
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deadly-writing-urges · 5 months ago
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The woman that is in the back of my brain is my defender. She is always on guard, always prepared and never fails to make me feel safe. That woman lurks under my skin waiting to release her claws and make sharp witty and hurtful comments about you. She is creatively cruel, but never sorry for it.
There is another woman who battles for the spotlight, she watches cartoons and paints. She likes going out for coffee and laughing with likeminded individuals. She longs to be a mother and correct all previous mistakes made by her own.
I am the mentally ill one. The one that struggles to open her eyes each morning knowing the amount of mistakes I will not correct. I am still speaking to our mother regardless of her cruelty. I am exhausted.
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deadly-writing-urges · 5 months ago
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I am loved to the point of knowing what happens next. Its predictable, unwavering and unconditional.
When I make mistakes, I am not a burden, I am human.
You love me the same if not more for all my flaws and blunders and for that I am eternally thankful.
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deadly-writing-urges · 5 months ago
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How odd it is to crave something that has caused you so much pain. No matter how painful it was, it was different, it was the attention I needed. Your cruel intentions went unnoticed by me, because all I saw was the intention, that little bit of effort.
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deadly-writing-urges · 5 months ago
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deadly-writing-urges · 5 months ago
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Your Biggest Regret?
Giving people permission to cause me irrevocable harm and then thanking them for their time.
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deadly-writing-urges · 5 months ago
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Cosy Winter Aesthetic
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deadly-writing-urges · 6 months ago
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I was burning, while you came blaming me for the smell of ashes. -Fyodor Dostoevsky
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deadly-writing-urges · 6 months ago
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deadly-writing-urges · 6 months ago
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Waiting for Fall
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