fatb1tch666

[fatb1tch666]

ok so i’ve been with my boyfriend for 5 months now and i have told him about my struggles with my ed pretty early on but this is the first time he’s witnessing a full blown relapse.

yesterday i was at his place and i was laying beside him without any clothes on and he looked at me so worried and said „oh no baby you’ve lost so much weight already“. he just kept commenting on it and it felt so insanely validating especially because i didn’t really feel like i lost any weight although i’ve been restricting so heavily.

i love it so much it really motivates me to keep restricting!!

[fatb1tch666]

these will always get to me

like OMG?? that WILL be me

[fatb1tch666]

i‘m not gonna be having my usual metab-day on tuesday to make up for it plus i’m gonna set a limit of 250kcal a day for the whole week.

oh my god i was baking for my family and i just started fucking binging on cinnamon-filling and chocolate and stuff if i’m lucky i’m still just slightly above 1000 calories (my limit is 400…) but i really just want to fucking die right now i feel like all my progress just went to shit.

i can’t even purge because my family is home oh my gooooood 😭

[fatb1tch666]

oh my god i was baking for my family and i just started fucking binging on cinnamon-filling and chocolate and stuff if i’m lucky i’m still just slightly above 1000 calories (my limit is 400…) but i really just want to fucking die right now i feel like all my progress just went to shit.

i can’t even purge because my family is home oh my gooooood 😭

[fatb1tch666]

how the fuck did i underestimate the calories of a pizza this badly 😭😭😭😭😭

[fatb1tch666]

honestly it’s kinda crazy how much thinsp0 has changed. like i remember when i started looking at ed forums about 7/8 years ago the pictures people would share were mainly deathspø while the ones on tumblr these days are more healthy-looking yk?

has anyone else noticed this?

[fatb1tch666]

I’ve got to get back on track

[fatb1tch666]

i just ate a pack of instant ramen noodles and tried purging it up but it just didn’t work at all which is weird because everyone keeps saying that they’re super easy to purge..

all i could throw up was some water with like every tenth to fifteenth gag and i did that for half an hour before the pain in my throat became unbearable i’m so fucking upset rn

the first and easiest thing i ever purged were thick noodles with spinach so i’m thinking about making the same noodles with cheese later and maybe the ramen noodles will come up with that? either way i’ll burn all the ramen calories with a hiit workout

[fatb1tch666]

just had the first pb&j of my entire life (i chewed and spat the whole thing) 😁😁

[fatb1tch666]

so like i just complained about not being able to purge a couple days ago (i've been disordered for seven years but just couldn't do it no matter how often i tried) and i just succeeded for the first fucking time i'm so proud of myself AHHHHH

not gonna lie it really did taste the same coming up as it did going down 💀

[fatb1tch666]

are any other ana ppl lowkey jealous of bulimics? like i genuinely can’t purge i want to eat huge amounts of food without gaining weight but i can’t i can’t i can’t

[fatb1tch666]

just changed my ugw from 40kg to 39kg cause there’s no way i won’t want to get into the 30‘s once i’m that close.. 9 more kilos to go!!

[fatb1tch666]

guys i just pan-roasted some mushrooms and it was literally sooo filling and only 76(!!!!) calories?? why have i never seen anybody on edblr eat this 😭 (it tasted like chinese food for some reason it was so good omg)

50g onion (14kcal)

100g mushrooms (22kcal)

1 tsp olive oil (40kcal)

[fatb1tch666]

ok so the new scale is accurate meaning that i have always weighed 0,65 more than i thought oh my fucking god i'm about to cry

guys my worst nightmare just came true i ordered a new scale for my room and it shows 0.65kg more than the other scale 😭😭

i’ll put some weights on both of them to see which one is more accurate but i’m scareddd

[fatb1tch666]

guys my worst nightmare just came true i ordered a new scale for my room and it shows 0.65kg more than the other scale 😭😭

i’ll put some weights on both of them to see which one is more accurate but i’m scareddd

[fatb1tch666]

can i marry coke zero?

[fatb1tch666]

this is my breakfast-lunch-dinner (roughly 143 cals) 😋😋😋

i might have some pickles and/or blueberries later if the cravings are too much