#ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏

[karmazitos]

ᓚᘏᗢ ۫  . ﾟ 🌟 nami !! ઇ♡ଓ

[s-4pphics]

hiii can you recommend some abby or ellie fics? i feel like i’ve gone thru all of tumblr LMAO btw LOVE your writing

HIIIII BABY i have a tag for fics that i love!!! i haven’t read that many recently bc i’ve been busy but u can look through that if ud like :p

I DOOO HAVE FAV WRITERS THO :p

@addisonnie @thelastoflesbians @seattlesellie @hazelnutsforellie @sp4cepunisher @catsfor2 @beanlot @losingherface @winfleurs @angvlita @ohcaptains @ourautumn86 @poutsiez @digit4lslut @dragonasflowercrown @elliesbelle @elliessknife @elliesbelle @m-3-ijiworld @millersaurora @wlfpet :333

IK IM MISSING SOME PPL BUT YE LOVE YALL MWWWAH

[thisbibliomaniac]

Not in the mood for other people insulting my friends I think

[baenuit]

soft & dark symbols.

soft:

ㅤ ୨୧ ✿𝅼    🦢 ♡ㅤ ⋂⋂ ⁺ ｡

⬭ യ 𝆹 ㅊ ⌒ㅤ꒰ ◌ ◞ ◟ ꒱ㅤ♪

ㅤ ꒰ㅤ꒰ ㅤᘛ porcᧉl𐐼ꪱnᧉ⠀ ᨳ⠀ 𖠗 ꕤ

° ᦃ ｡ dⱺll 𝆬 ㅉ ๑ Ⳋ

ᘞ ㅤ!! ㅤ ഒ ㅤ 𐂯 ത ૮ ࣪ .

🥐 ฅ ⠀ ۪ ݁ ⠀ʚɞ⠀ ⪨ ⪨ ⠀˚⠀ ⌗

￮ 𓈒 ⁺ 𝙰𝙼𝙾𝚁ㅤ𝆬 ♡︎ ! 음식 ୭୧ㅤ۪ 🖖🏻🥛

⠀͡ ꒱ ᜊ ⪩⪨ ˚ ✧ 🗒️ cⴙxrry

౨ৎ ㅤ۪ ⬭ ㅋᩚ 𓇼 ꯱ 여왕 ❀ ᨺ

🐇 ᰌ ִ を 🅅 귀여운 ֙ㅤ 𝚣 ᶻ zㅤ

𓈒ㅤ 𑁯ㅤ 🌿 ☆‌ ੭ ꒰ ੭ㅤmochi'! ᜊ゙

ᨳ 甘い花 ✿" ﹆ · ✉️ ⊹ ‹𝟹

ᄈ ⠀ 🐭ㅤ︖﹖ㅤ✩ ㅤ꒰ ⁄ ⁄ ⁄ก ིྀ ִ ⠀㔾

dark:

✦ㅤ𓈒⠀🌀 . 。 𖥔 ⠀⏜ ᷼ ★ 𝐓ّ‽𝐑݄𝐄ٌ𝐃̶̸᪶

♣️ֶ 𖣯 ～ ᯙ̸̷ ⬞ ︒ㅤ۪ ༆ ִ ᐛ

˖ ˙ 🌪️ ᶻᶻ ㅤ𝟎︭𝟗︭ㅤ 癝 ㅤ⏤ ㅤ𖠋 !?

✿◌ 🎧 © 𝐖̲𝐓𝐅̷ ᨒ⃢ ✔︎ ☺︎︎☻︎☹︎

ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏 ﹏     ☑️ ⸼ ࣪. ㅤ҉ ▌   *

𝓢ᴇᴍ 𝒜𝗆𝗈𝗋 ☆゙ ᭥ 𓇽 ⸻̸ㅤ ꫂ ၴႅၴ ♥︎ぇ

𓆡 ۫ ♱ ‧ 인형 ⠀ﾉ ⠀ ৶ ꒷꒦ 〹 ➜ ﹔

リ ᶻ ﹒ 遅い ₊ 𝅄 ♥︎⠀ ٢⠀ㅤֶָ֪̫ㅤ🐈‍⬛ ۪ 𝆺𝅥𝅮 𖤝

🎸 ㅤ𝔉̸𝃣 ׂ !? 𝂒 ★ㅤ𝆇𝄖 🌪️ㅤ𐏐ㅤ⅌ㅤ鑫

ㅤ 💲 𓊪ㅤ ᨞ㅤ ◟ ㅤ⚫ㅤ ≡ ⟍⟋ ㅤ𝗜 ⓘㅤ ࣪

𖩤𖩣 ︵͡ ⁺ 𝓥𝖾𝗋𝗍𝖾 ❤︎⠀ ⸼ ◒ 💻

𓆱 ⺀ ⩩ ＊ ⛓ 𐚱 〻 !!

𖢲 ﹅ ׁׁ ■ ꔵ 〨 ִֶָ ☄ : : ﹙﹠﹚

[gloxk]

Sneaky linkin’

(Eren Y. Armin A. Connie S.)

A/N: i’m not COMPLETELY back, but I am making a slight improvement w my mental health… so here’s sum slight for yall🤷🏽‍♀️. I kinda hate this but maybe yall will like it..ion know. Luv ya tho. 17+.

Synopsis: Aot men as sneaky links.

Warning: Smut.. F/M

━━━━━━━⚠︎━━━━━━━

Eren! ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏 ———Back seat bandit

Eren..is definitely a back seat bandit. It’s mainly because he has a nice car, why not show it off?

Now, all i’m going to say is (Persian rugs- jacquees version.) Oh lawwwd, he definitely plays that while giving the most sloppiest, nastiest, messiest, back arching back shots ever. This man does NOT play.

Hair puller, choker, dirty talker. He’s the type to make you tell him how good he’s fucking you. “Uh-huh, right there? You like that baby?” And you better tell him too.

The hair pulling thing just comes by instinct. You could be giving this man the sloppiest head ever, deep throating him till hes hitting the back of your esophagus and all. The type of head that makes him feel like he’s shifting reality. He will tug your hair to get a real good look at your face, saliva dripping down your chin and red coating your face. A face that just screams ‘ Am I making you happy?’. He would stare at you with a shit eating grin just while the camera flash hits your face.

Degrading as fuck. He would just say some shit to boost his ego during sex. “I know you like that shit, stop acting like you don’t.” & “You can scream my name louder than that. Try again.” & “Stop fuckin running.” Don’t be fooled now, he’s also going to talk you through it and give you reassurance. “You doin so good f’me.” & “it’s all yours mami.” & “You look so pretty right now.”

Ugh this man just loves to have his hand wrapped around your body. Around your waist, neck, thighs, hands—it don’t matter to him. He loves touching on you. Any time yall link his hands just find their way over your body.

Connie! ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏 ——— Any time any where

Connie..is the type of guy who can fuck ANYWHERE. Car, room, closet, random family bathroom at a gas station—he don’t care.

If you’re down, he’s down. Y’all could be out shopping and he fucks you in the dressing room.

This man LOVES when you ride him. He would just watch you in awe while you bounce up and down on him.

Definitely a talker during sex, he loves telling you how good you’re doing. “Mhm—fuck—I love when you do that.” & “Cmoonn look at me while you do it.” & “Arch that back mama.”

Now, he’s a recorder. He records everything. He has a little folder in his phone dedicated to your link ups.

Although he’s gonna dick you down anywhere he can, his favorite place is the shower. Got some music playing in the background (P power - gunna) while he’s plowing into you. The shower couldn’t even cover up your loud moans.

Pull out ? Nah, “You wanna be grown, let’s be grown baby.” He doesn’t believe in wasting, so either you sucking it up or taking that shit.

Armin! ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏 ——— munch

Armin..is an eater. He’s gonna eat like it’s his last meal every fucking time. His tongue game is vicious. Absolutely diabolical, the messiest head you will ever get.

Salvia dripping on the couch, tears falling from your eyes due to overstimulation, legs locking around his head—he still wouldn’t stop. He won’t stop till you force him to.

Hold on now, Armin ain’t just an eater, he got good dick too. He’s a saint that’s gonna fuck you like a sinner. Let him get some liquor in his system and you’re going to be begging for round 2.

Speaking of drunk Armin, he’s gonna fuck you against a wall. Just something that’s going to happen one way or the other. One leg in the air while the other dangles just above the floor, his hands gripping on your ass so hard it leaves a mark.

Oh it doesn’t stop there either, he’s going to stumble his way to the bed and take you there too.

Hella vocal whimpering, moaning, whispering. He’s going to let you know your pussy good. “God-you feel so fuckin good.” & “Please keep doing that.”

Loves teaching you new things, different kinks, positions, anything of the sort. I know he just loves exploring and experimenting things with you. He’s a freaky freak for sure. <3

━━━━━━━⚠︎━━━━━━━

whore…

[s-eokie]

૮꒰っ´ `ς꒱ ♡ idol makes me feel sad and zZz when he ' s not around me, 보고 싶어요 so much. ੭

✿, 𝒮 𝗎𝗇𝖿𝗅𝗈𝗐𝖾𝗋𝗌 — they reminds me of you, my beloved ꒰ idol ꒱.

ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏 𝗐𝖾𝖺𝗉𝗈𝗇 𝗈𝒇 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾 ִֶָ only for my beloved, 사랑으로 촬영하다 in ﹫idol. ㄱㅅㄱ

୨୧ ♡ ୨୧

meu maior 𝖺𝗆𝗈𝗋 𝗌𝗂𝗇𝖼𝖾𝗋𝗈,

eu te amo infinito, idol.

[guilty-ff]

Fading Shadows: Love and Betrayal pt.1

ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏 ˚⁎⁺˳ .

Simon has been your boyfriend for nearly four years. Both of you being colleagues in the 141 task force, living with the dangers of a sergeant being in a relationship with a lietaunent. As Ghost departs on a mission to bring Makarov back, ghosting you for months and coming back as a different person, your relationship begins to crumble

Pairings: fem!reader, Simon Riley, König

Genre: mild angst

Tags: MW3 Spoilers, angst, ghosting, anxiety, arguing, break up, independent, death, kinda Asshole Ghost

It's been three months since your boyfriend Simon departed for the mission with his teammates to catch Makarov. You are a part of Task Force 141, but due to a bullet injury on your left shoulder, you were not allowed to join and requested rest.

You asked Laswell countless times for their status. Not a single message or tracking of the group can be found. Anxiety that something might have happened to the group and specifically your boyfriend begins to rise, and several sleepless nights have been encountered. You promised each other, before being recruited for any mission, to stay in contact.

You are currently lying in your and Simon's shared bed, taking small breaths of his shirt lingering with cologne, wishing each second to receive a sign of his wellbeing. Sure, you both knew what you were getting into when you decided to confess to each other and get into a relationship. Your friends and family, even your colleagues, warned you of a relationship in the military, but nevertheless, you and Simon frankly did not care.

The high ceilings of your bedroom are seeming larger than before. You feel as if you are taking up all the space. Every night is the same. Staring daggers into the wall until reality hits.

You hear a door squeaking and by the time you turn your back, you are facing your boyfriend in his tactical uniform, combat boots and skull mask. You have always loved his military uniform and the way it fits and contours his physic. Likewise, you managed to conceal your face with an agonizing smile. Hiding all the concern and emotions of distress you felt over the past few months.

Living with him for two years taught you that you needed to be patient. After each mission, he returns with a stoic expression and tensed muscles. Him opening up to you took him months, and you do not want to pressure him any further. You knew about his trauma, the things he went through as a child, the results of a childhood full of assault, and the way he copes with his problems. One of them is to lock them up and slowly open them one by one.

While you watch him stripping off his tactical gear and mask, you notice a different look in his face. An expression you cannot read or identify.

As he walks towards the bed, you are moving closer to his side of the bed and can sense the mattress sink and the bedsheets shift. You are wrapping your arms around his shoulders and snuggling up close. Both of you have always loved to cuddle and feel each other's body heat. But now, it feels much more distant and foreign. You shake off these thoughts, close your eyes, and hug him even tighter. 

In the morning, you were woken up by your alarm, you pull the sheets tighter around your body. Sensing nothing but cold air caressing your body. You open your eyes, trying to reach for your phone for a few moments before realizing that your partner is nowhere to be found.

You straighten yourself up and get ready for your morning routine as you find a little note on the drawer next to your side:

"I'm off to work"

Usually he wakes you up before leaving the house, but since yesterday, each habit has become foreign.

Even though your injuries have not healed properly, you decide to go to the base and start training. As long as you go easy on yourself and are careful with your stitches, you will find training to be a good alternative to ease your mind.

After arriving at the base, you see your team from afar sitting at the meeting table. Captain Price looks up, and our eyes meet. 

"Aren't you supposed to stay at home, Sergeant?" He asks, furrowing his brown brow and crossing his arms.

"You know me damn well, Captain. You can't expect me to just sit at home and do nothing. I'm fully rested and ready to take up my work, " I answer truthfully, with a wide grin crossing my face. 

My eyes are scanning the room. 

Looking to my left, there sits Ghost, cleaning his rifle with an old cloth, focusing to get all the dirt out of the muzzle before using it for the sniping training with new recruits.

At my right, Gaz is sitting at the end of the table, fully clothed and hooded, with a saddened appearance. The longer I remain in the room, the more the atmosphere feels suffocating, pressing the air out of my lungs. 

Counting each member of the group, I witness that someone is missing. 

"Isn't it past our meeting time? Where the fuck is Soap at? Always being late, isn’t he?" I try to laugh the depressed ambience off. 

Price's contentment look got plastered drastically into a painful expression on his face. 

Price hesitates before mumbling “K.I.A” 

“What did you just say?” I ask fully known what he has just said. You and Soap were not that much closer in comparison to him and Simon. Nevertheless, he was someone who brought positive vibes in the TF141, which was through all the bloody mission very much needed. Searching throughout the room for answers, your eyes are landing on Simon, who avoids eye contact.

"Makorov shot him in the skull while shielding Simon from Makorov shooting range, he truly died as a hero. In spite of that, we were unable to rescue him. It was an instant kill in action.“

"I could have been there. My shoulder were only aching a bit. I could have been of use-"

"No. Y/n you could have done nothing. The orders of the higher ups were final, and your injuries could’ve been a burden to us.“ Gaz interrupts understanding your moment of distress.

The news of Soap's demise hits you like a shockwave, the weight of grief settling heavy in your chest. Your eyes fixate on Simon, searching for any sign of emotion, but he remains distant, his gaze fixed on some distant point. The room's stifling atmosphere becomes unbearable.

As Gaz speaks about the circumstances leading to Soap's death, you can't help but feel a pang of guilt. The what-ifs echo in your mind, wondering if your presence could have altered the tragic outcome. Gaz's reassurance attempts to pacify your self-blame, but the guilt lingers.

In the days that follow, the once-shared apartment with Simon becomes a silent battleground of unspoken pain. Simon withdraws further, shutting out the world with a stoic facade, and you struggle to bridge the growing gap.

Attempting to salvage what remains, you confront Simon in the dimly lit living room. "Simon, we need to talk. This silence is tearing us apart. Soap's gone, but we're still here, and I can't lose you too."

As he does not speak, you try to calm yourself down and trying your best to be patient and understanding, when all of a sudden, Simon stands up from the couch and leaves you alone in the living room, taking his phone and ignoring you. A synapsis snapped, and all your build in anger, guilt and angst over the past few months exit your body.

"That's enough, if you don’t mind talking to me, alright I get it, if you keep ignoring me, sure enough, but if you do so, you should at least look at me while I'm speaking to you". I yank his phone out of his hand and make him lower his head.

"For fuck's sake, what the fuck was that for? Mind your own bloody business. Stop annoying me and keep out of it.“ he raises his voice at you, something he has never done.

Your frustration eruptes in a torrent of words, "Simon, you can't keep ignoring my feelings and opinions. It's like you live in your own world, completely oblivious to everything I say!"

"I'm not ignoring you. I just don't have time for constant fucking complaints. Maybe if you had something constructive to say-"

"Constructive? How about acknowledging that I have valid thoughts and emotions? You dismiss everything I bring up!"

Simon scoffes,"You're exaggerating. I'm dealing with real problems, not your constant need for attention."

Y/n's anger simmering, "Real problems? Ignoring your partner is a real problem. I'm right here, trying to communicate, and you act like I'm invisible."

Simon, brushing it off, said, "I've got work, responsibilities. I can't be catering to your every whim."

"Damn it. It's not about catering, Simon. It's about being a partner, someone who listens and cares. But you're so wrapped up in your narcissistic ass mindset that you don't even see how much you're hurting me."

Simon, oblivious or unwilling to understand, replies, "I don't have time for this drama. If you can't handle it, maybe we should reevaluate this relationship."

"You really are a pathetic piece of shit, Simon. I'm here trying my best to hold this relationship between us together. While you, you keep on-"

"Of course. It's always me to blame, isn't it? It's always gotta be about you. Maybe your mother should have been present in your childhood and taught you some manners instead of bitching around like you do. Maybe it really would've been better for all of us if you would have come to the mission instead of Soap and died there instead of him-" he snaps back, completely unaware of what he just said.

*smack* Simon feels a sharp sting across his right cheek, unable to answer, he just stares blankly at you and decides not to take a single word back.

You are standing with teary eyes in front of him, trying to process the things he said.

"Well maybe, it would be the best for us if we break up!" I scream back.

The room falls into an awkward silence after the resounding smack. Simon's cheek burns, mirroring the emotional fire that had ignited between you. In the midst of your tears, a newfound strength emerges.

Without a word, you turn away, refusing to let Simon witness your vulnerability any longer. As you gather your belongings, a heavy silence settles, the relationship irreparably fractured. Simon, still grappling with the impact of his words, realizes the magnitude of his actions but finds himself paralyzed by the weight of regret.

With a final, sorrowful glance, you leave the room, leaving Simon to confront the consequences of his hurtful words. The painful truth lingers, marking the end of a relationship that once held a promise.

[thenovamuse]

ㅤ⊹ ˖ ࣪ ⋆ .★⊹ ˖ ࣪ ⋆ .°ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏 ⊹ ˖ ࣪ ⋆ .★⊹ ˖ ࣪ ⋆ .°

[yamiwnzzn]

letras & enfeites.

save, reblog, like, follow me please !

kaomojis !!

ᐢ..ᐢ ૮ ・ﻌ・ა  ૮₍ ˃̵͈᷄ . ˂̵͈᷅ ₎ა  ૮₍ ˃ࡇ˂ ₎ა  ૮ ・ﻌ・ა

૮₍ ˃ ⤙ ˂ ₎ა     ૮ ◞ ﻌ ◟ ა  ૮₍´｡• ᵕ •｡`₎ა   ₍ ੭ᐢ..ᐢ)੭♡

₍ᐢ˶• ˔ กᐢ₎   ꒰ ˵ • ˵ • ˵ ꒱   (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ)     ᘏ▸◂ᘏ    

૮ / / / ก ა  ᐢ⸼⸼ᐢ ૮(ˊ ᵔ ˋ)ა    •᷄‎ࡇ•᷅   ૮₍｡´• ˕ •`｡₎ა

  ˃ᆺ ˂    ꒰ᐢ • ˕ • ᐢ꒱      ૮ ๑ˊᯅˋ๑ აִ   ૮꒰˵• ﻌ •˵꒱ა 

૮₍꜆꜄ ˃ ³ ˂ ₎ა    ૮₍ ⸝⸝´ ꒳ `⸝⸝ ₎ა  ૮₍⑅˶•▿•˶⑅₎ა  

꒰ ᐢ⸝⸝•༝•⸝⸝ᐢ ꒱     ૮ – ﻌ–ა ૮₍ ˵ • ꤮ ก ˵ ₎︎ა  

૮₍｡´ᴖ ˔ ᴖ`｡₎ა     ૮₍´˶• . • ⑅ ₎ა     (๑•́ ₃ •̀๑)  •᷄ࡇ•᷅ 

'ㅅ'   ᵔᴗᵔ  ᴖ.ᴖ  ˃ᴗ˂   ᵔદᵔ     ૮₍ ˃̵͈᷄ . ˂̵͈᷅ ₎ა⠀૮₍ ˃ ⤙ ˂ ₎ა

૮ • ﻌ - ა  ૮・ﻌ・ა  ૮ • ᴥ • ა   ૮₍´ ˶ ｪ ˵ '₎ა 

૮₍ ⑅ ᐢ..ᐢ   ₎ა   ₍ ੭ᐢ..ᐢ)੭♡    ૮꒰˵• ﻌ •˵꒱ა

(⃔っ •̤ ༝ •̤ c)⃕ ૮₍ ⸝⸝´ ꒳ '⸝⸝ ₎ა    •᷄ɞ•᷅  •́ ₃ •̀  •᷄ࡇ•᷅   ᴖ ᴈ ᴖ

  ˃̵ᴗ˂̵  ᵔᴗᵔ  ･᷄-･᷅  ˶ᵔ ꈊ ᵔ     (๑•̀ㅁ•́๑)  (ᯅ̈ )  (  ･᷄-･᷅ ) 

(๑•́ ᎔ ก̀๑)  (◍´ᯅ `◍)     ૮₍ ˃ ⤙ ˂ ₎ა    ૮₍ 𖦹 ˕ ×` ₎ა

  (｀_´)ゞ   ꉂ(ˊᗜˋ*)      ヾ(`ヘ´)ﾉ    (´-ㅅก`)    (੭˃̵ᴗ˂̵)੭

   ٩(｡•́‿•̀｡)۶

outros.

୨୧ ୨♡୧ ༺♡༻༾♡༿ 𓆩♡𓆪   ᕱ⑅ᕱ   ‹3   ▞▞▞▞   ( :̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:★:]̲̅ :̲̅:̲̅:̲̅)   (:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅[̲̅:♡:]̲̅:̲̅:̲̅:̲̅)   ☆★  

▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀

⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘ 

𓏲 ๋࣭     ࣪ ˖        ⋆ ࣪.     ˖ ࣪⭑      ˖ ࣪ ٬     ุ๋ ⸱ 

   ִֶָ . ָ࣪        ˑ ֗ ִ         ˑ ִ ֗

ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏 . . .

[s-4pphics]

i see you have updated click. you will receive chapter 12 of ncty as promised.

EVERYBODY SAY THANK YOU RIGJT FUCKFIFNNNOWWWWWW

[dearestxiao]

the color blue: neon [part 2] | yandere xiao x reader, yandere venti x reader

synopsis: the days until you finally meet your penpal has been ticking by so quickly, but with a new tutor, a clingy roommate, and a professor who seems to only want the worst for you, it's hard to keep track of time. WARNINGS: DARK CONTENT, yandere characters, creepy xiao is creepy (lots of potentially uncomfortable thoughts from his perspective), heavily implied stalking, possessiveness, manipulation, dub-con touching, student-teacher dynamic, age gap (reader is 21+ and zhongli is 27+, feel free to adjust as need be). let me know if I need to add anything! reader is gender neutral.

wc: 10.7k

author notes: I wanted to first say thank you for the wait, and I hope that everybody is able to enjoy the changes and edits I’ve made to the story. I also wanted to say thank you to the mutuals who had helped me create the original version of the story. it has been a long time since then, and I’m not entirely sure if they’re still active (OTZ), so I’m not sure if they would still like to be tagged but I am forever grateful to them. this is the last exposition heavy chapter, as well as my last read edit/re-upload of a chapter, so the next few chapters will be much meatier with new content!!! again, thank you so much for the wait. love you all! as always, reblogs are very appreciated if enjoyed and if possible!

ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏” ♡♡♡ [part 1]

dark content. minors do not interact. do not repost/link.

from xiao's room, there's a perfect view of the town a bit away from campus that greets him everytime he steps inside. it's a gorgeous sight, which is something he could admit, even though he didn’t choose the place himself, one anyone would be grateful for. the town is bright and bustling even still, and it’s only now starting to dim down. it’s getting late into the night, with flashy lights and beautiful architecture and homey buildings, and so many people, people, people.

there are still families on an outing, and cute couples going on dates. shop owners sweeping around their store. he can see as the everyday salaryman walks back home, accompanying the students on their own way home from classes; he can see so many lives being lived from his isolated little tower.

and yet, on nights like these, no matter how enchanting the view, xiao usually prefers to keep his blinds tightly shutー out of sight, out of mind. jealousy is a vile thing, isn't it? it's nasty, tainting your view of the world, of the things you love. after the first few weeks after xiao had moved in, the view quickly lost the charm it once had. because at the end of the day, to him, the view only serves as a cruel reminder of just how alone xiao is and always has been.

it dangles around a painful reminder of the things xiao can never have. it's so close, yet so far out of reach.

but despite his usual bitterness, xiao doesn’t bother closing the blinds tonight, because tonight, he has hope, hope that he could one day be like the many walks of life he sees everyday from his apartment window. hope that he’ll have something worth wondering about.

xiao sits himself on his bed, the second biggest source of comfort in his life right now. for some reason, he feels awfully nervous. he knows why, but he can’t help but wish that awful feeling away. for a split second, he can’t help but wish he was as confident and fearless as... no. he won’t think like that, not right now, at least. he shakes away the thought. butterflies jitter all up and around his stomach as his shaky hands picks up his phone and dials numbers, your numbers. the digits are already memorized by heart.

he tries to calm his nerves as he presses the phone up to his ear after hitting the call button, nails digging into the pajamas he changed into when he got home. he thickly swallows, waiting as patiently as he can, like usual.

ring. rinnng. rinnnnnggg. 

it doesn't take too long for you to pick up.

"hello?" he finally hears.

it's only one word (and a pretty basic one at that), but xiao can already hear the soft underlying shyness of your voice. his mouth naturally opens a little agape. you've always been nervous around those you weren't close to. your voice sends him into a state of bliss, so much so his brain is too foggy to reply until you coo out another hello, questioning if anyone is there on the other line due to the silence.

he almost has to force himself to speak "It's… xiao," he blinks, not even saying hello back, "from professor zhongli's class," xiao almost slips up by saying the name you know him much better by. “you… we spoke on the train. I don’t know if you remember,” he manages to stutter out.

you had seemed pretty out of it when you two talked earlier that very same day. you must’ve been so exhausted to have fallen asleep like that, right next to him. he’s still replaying the site of it over and over, the way you were struggling so hard to stay awake, head bobbing back and forth. it was probably embarrassing for you, but it was a pleasant sight for him. the soft puff of your cheeks and the furrow of your brows, the shallowness of your breath and how relaxed you looked. it made him feel like a creep, staring at you in that state, such an intimate state, a vulnerable state. 

it’s why he had held back as long as he could before finally tapping you awake, wanting to bask in the precious sight for longer.

he snaps back to finally finish his explanation, “…you gave me your number earlier today," he says it less as a reminder to you, but instead as a reminder to himself. he bites his lip, waiting for you to respond, wishing he could see what you looked like right now.

in the meantime, he remembers how your eyes had begrudgingly opened back up at the feeling of him touching you. he remembers the warmth of your body that felt like it could melt his finger tips from the heat. he wishes he could see and feel both much more often, but xiao is patient. lord, is he patient.

he remembers how embarrassed you looked as you sat up in your seat, trying to reorient yourself. “sorry, what did you say?” you finally had spoken after getting settled. you must’ve been too frazzled to hear him the first time. he cleared his throat before he repeated himself, this time a little louder, a little less shy than the first time around.

“I asked which stop you get off at.” you looked at him with eyes big with confusion. he hoped, desperately (he’s always so desperate), that he hadn’t made you feel anything negative.

he made sure to explain the question in hopes that it made you feel more comfortable and not as confused. “…I can wake you up before you get there, if you’d like.”

despite his wants, he needed to make sure you were safe, and were able to actually get home. if he didn’t ‘protect’ you, who would? definitely not that roommate of yours.

to his (would be short-lived) disappointment you had shaken your head. “no, it’s fine. I really shouldn’t have fallen asleep in the first place.” you had paused for a short second before saying, “thank you, though, xiao.” he doesn’t like to remember how he almost shivered at the sound of his name coming from your lips, nor how he had to turn his head as he nodded because he could feel heat creep up it. 

"oh, yes, xiao! sorry, I wasn't expecting you to call so soon. what can I do for you?"

“you asked on the train if I could tutor you. I wanted to set something up.”

it’s true, even if xiao can’t believe it himself. he knew this day would come, but didn’t expect it to be this soon. after several minutes of silence between you two, (or at least as silent as it could be on a train), you had turned to him, as if remembering something, getting his attention before you asked him something.

“sorry if this is coming out of nowhere. I was wondering if…” you took a breath, and xiao had almost sworn you were bordering scared as you finished your question. “I was wondering if you could possibly tutor me for zhonglis class? I don’t know if you’d be able to, but I spoke to him earlier today, and he recommended asking you for help.”

and of course he had said yes, to your surprise. he remembers thinking, silently, that maybe the universe was rewarding him for being so patient, and he had to keep his cool the best he could. 

now here he is, actually setting something up. “would tomorrow with you?”

"yes!," you let out a nervous little laugh at your uncontrollable excitement. xiao can just picture the smile you have on your face, all shy and awkward and cute. "that would work great, I think. I really wasn't expecting you to set something up so quickly. I'm grateful though."

xiao would make the tutoring session today during the dead of night if he could. of course he would set something up so quickly.

you don't need to know that, though.

xiao hums at your words. "we… we can have our first session at my place, if you're comfortable with that." he realizes he might be coming off too strong, so he adds, "but we can have it somewhere else too." he hopes you agree to the first suggestion though.

"t-that'd be great, yeah. whatever works for you, works for me."

"I'll text you the address and the time, then… and we can discuss more sessions or a schedule and stuff further.”

"that sounds good. thank you so much again." you repeat, and he can hear the relief in your voice. it should be him thanking you, really. 

"of course. goodnight."

“goodnight!” you repeat before you both hang up. a wave of bliss strikes his body.

but he isn’t going to sleep, not yet, atleast. Instead, he’s going to stay up all night, right in front of his window, thinking of all the possible lives he’s about to live.

he’ll make sure to thank zhongli for that in the morning.

ーーー NEW MESSAGE ーーー ☆

[name]: I don't think you understand how nervous I am right now

[name]: my hands are shaking and everything

alatus: why? is something wrong?

[name]: you know how I told you how I wasn't doing the greatest in one of my courses?

alatus: of course. did something happen?

[name]: the most intimidating guy I've ever met in my life is my tutor now

[name]: and I have no idea how this first session is gonna go

alatus: I think you’ll be fine. you shouldn’t worry yourself

alatus: you should let me know how everything goes.

ーーー☆

xiao's home is, to put it simply, unique.

you were left awestruck as soon as you stepped into the small but gorgeous studio apartment, shocked by both the feeling of jealousy creeping up your spine and the thought of how someone could possibly afford such an apartment, especially as a college student. no matter how xiao manages to afford his place, though, his home daunts over you. 

there's a large window that lines the wall his bed and desk are propped up against and you can't help but imagine just how xiao would look as he looked out of it and at the bustling city. the glass is frosted and wet from the pitter pattering rain that seems to persist in the cool weather of october. it's a little messy, books scattered about here and there and takeout bags littering the table, and the amount of lighting in this room seems to be as minimal (and as cold) as can be, but it's nothing too bad at all. nothing that you could complain about, at least. 

there's so many things inside his house, so many things your eyes are drawn to, like his big bookcase and comfy bed and his expensive computer setup, and yet it feels so... lonely. devoid of life, even. maybe it's the look of the gloomy black walls and the fact that the only lighting xiao has is a tall floor lamp and the light that comes through his window, but you've never seen such a full home feel so empty. no plants except for one little succulent that's looking worse for wear, no photos of friends or family, no bright colors, no pets to breathe life into the place, no companion to help make this house a home. nothing.

you're suddenly grateful you have such a lively roommate.

it's been a few minutes since xiao had let you in, greeting you in his comfy hoodie and baggy pants, hair put up into a messy bun, before attending to something on his computer (an important email you think, or at least something along those likes, something urgent), telling you to sit wherever you'd like and that he'll be with you shortly. you had nodded while leaving your shoes at the door, asking him if his bed would be a seat he's okay with you being on, garnering a hum in response from him.

"...I'll sit here then, since it'll be close to you and stuff," you murmur, admittedly a bit more nervous and unconfident sounding than you'd like. you plop yourself onto xiao's bed, placing your bag at your feet in front of the bed for easy access. xiao takes what's meant to be a quick glance at you, but he's unable to look away.

he knows it's creepy to say, especially when you're just sitting down so innocently, but the sight is better than what he's fantasized about. he's thought of you so many times in his bed, cuddling with him and running your hands through his hair and letting him press kisses into your face and collar bones. he's thought about waking you up with breakfast and how you'd smile and thank him even if he can't cook very well, but he's willing to learn a couple recipes for you. he's thought about laying there with you after a long day, letting you ramble as he listened like he does as alatus. he's thought about how he'd great you once he comes home like you probably do with venti, watching your form as he wait on his bed for him.

and, most of all, he's thought about the way you'd cry and sob and call him a monster once the day that you find out that his bed is now yours and that this apartment is now your home, trapped forever with him, finally comes.

one day you'll be here permanently, he's sure of it. baby steps first, though.

xiao doesn't realize that in the midst of his thinking, he's been absolutely staring you down, and considering that xiao has a naturally viscous (bitchy) looking resting face, you can't help but squirm under his gaze. "xiao? I can... move, if you'd like."

"no, I just..." he clears his throat before looking back at the work in front of him. "sorry, I zoned out for a second. you can stay there if it feels comfortable. whatever you want." the words come out as a sort of awkward, almost inaudible mumble.

is this supposed to be as awkward and tense feeling as it is?

you nod at his words, albeit a little hesitant, further settling into the soft plush of his bed. your brain is still convinced that he might want you to move, but you decide to just stay where you are. you reach down from your seat, pulling out everything you would need from your bag, waiting patiently for any instructions. the soft clicking of xiao's keyboard and the sound of rain hitting against the window fill the otherwise silent room, and honestly, given the atmosphere and the way xiao's room is so dark and cozy and how warm and inviting his bed is, you're tempted to fall asleep.

xiao's presence, though nerve-wracking, makes you feel at home. it feels familiar. you wouldn't mind falling asleep near him again.

but today's (sadly) not the day for resting. xiao finishes whatever he's working on, closing out of the tab and turning his chair to face your spot on the bed. he brushes a piece of his hair back and out of the way, uncovering the eyebrow piercing the bothersome piece had previously hid. his eyes look dead, tired dark circles laying underneath, and yet he still forces himself to speak, like a zombie who simply refuses to just give up and die.

"did you have anything specific in mind that you want to go over?"

you take a second to think, humming in response. zhongli never truly specified what you needed to brush up upon, only that the last few assignments weren't up to his standards, whatever that means. "I don't know. maybe everything from the last few weeks? I'm not so sure."

he too lets out a soft little hum as he thinks for a moment. he's never tutored before, and he's pretty sure he doesn't even have the qualifications to actually be of any sort of help. he makes it up as he goes.

“on the back of your textbook, there's a study guide that covers all the chapters inside." he gently motions for you to give him the book sitting on your lap, flipping to the page before handing it back to you. "I want you to do the questions of the study guide that cover the chapters we've already read in class. then I'll... assess you from there, and we can come up with a plan.”

it seems like a lot of work, and that's because it is. the longer you spend here (the more he can milk this session for everything it's worth), the better.

you nod, moving to get to work immediately, putting your full effort into the task at hand. you both work silently, xiao clicking at his keys alongside the noise of you flipping through the pages of your textbook and jotting answers down. the noises compliment one another well, creating a lingering sense of peace and calm in the air. you find yourself getting stuck on one or two of the questions, but… surprisingly breezing through the rest, and after a while of working, you gently speak his name, alerting him that you've finished. he’s quick to take your work, starting his inspection of it. 

your hands can’t help but get a little clammy as you watch as he reads through your answers, analyzing each and every single written word. in the meantime, you’re doing a little analysis of your own, trying to distract your mind from feeling any more nervous than you realistically should. 

your eyes flick from his messy hair, to the beauty mark almost right in the middle of his forehead, then to the soft dusting of red eyeshadow under his eyes. you look at how he runs a finger against the words on the page, too, almost subconsciously, and though you can’t really tell from this angle what he’s doing, you think he’s more so tracing the letters you’ve written than using it as a means to follow along. he almost looks entranced. you don’t know what to expect from xiao, can’t even guess what he’s thinking, and the furrowed eyebrows on his face definitely don’t make you feel any better. 

you sit there, idley, awkwardly, fidgeting for what seemed like more than just a few minutes, before xiao finally speaks up. 

you can barely hear him as he speaks, his words hushed and muffled. "you... need a lot of brushing up on the content, and your answers… lack good explanations and reasoning." he hands you back your work, sending you an almost sympathetic look. "I can see why zhongli believes you need help,” he adds.

it's a lie, of course, but you don't need to know that, not when zhongli had so delicately laid down the groundwork for all of this to happen in the first place. most of your answers were just fine as is, at least from what he lightly skimmed through.

still, he can't help but feel guilty when that look of embarrassment washes over your face.

for some reason you feel yourself get overwhelmed with emotion. you thought that maybe, just maybe, zhongli was simply just messing with you, as was notorious with the man and his teaching methods. but there's a stark sense of embarrassment that comes from xiao reaffirming what zhongli had said, an embarrassment so strong it sends your entire body ablaze with heat. 

you can't help but awkwardly shift in your seat as you nod along to his words despite the way your head almost feels too heavy to lift, avoiding eye contact lest he sees you so embarrassed over something so... silly, a miniscule problem at best, something fixable with a bit of elbow grease and time, and yet it means way more than it should to you.

you've worked so hard in this class already. why aren't you improving?

he doesn’t let you really catch your breath before he speaks again. "I think we'll need a couple more sessions than we discussed earlier," he mumbles, again, as though too ashamed to speak up, flipping through his own textbook, face in his hand as he thinks. "I want to make sure we can get as much content covered as possible before the end of the semester and catch you back up, since you seem to be..." xiao takes a quick glance at you, and for a moment, just a split second, he sees you, sees inside of you, sees every little thing you've been keeping bottled up, your fear. he looks away, breath hitching out of complete and utter guilt. he forces himself to continue though.

"...behind," he finishes, the single word said notably softer than the rest of the sentence.

xiao forces himself to swallow down his guilt. truly, he feels terrible about lying about this, because you clearly seem to be doing just fine on you own and lord knows how much stress this entire ordeal is causing you, but what's the use of being presented and blessed by the gods themselves with such an amazing opportunity if his sinning hands can't take it out of greed? xiao hates it, but he's always been more of a taker than a giver, taking all he can from people and leaving nothing left of them.

the simple pure utter bliss at the thought of spending hours and hours with you, in his room, alone, intimately and in person instead of just being with you through a phone screen, extinguishes any guilt he could possibly feel.

you, on the other hand, do allow yourself to feel guilt, though it's a feeling that has much more innocent roots than what xiao feels. it's a feeling that pokes and stabs at you as you fumble for words to say. you're a much better person than xiao is in that regard. you can't help but to feel ashamed, ashamed that you were doing so terrible at a course that goes directly into your major that you would have to force xiaoー a man renowned for being a lonerー who surely would rather spend his free time by himself and not tutoring someone so out of your realm and element as you are.

maybe it's not too late after all to consider switching majors, you think.

"you seriously don't have to do that, I don't want to take more time from you than I'm already taking. honestly, I think I'm a bit of a lost cause at this point if I can't even do the simpler questions."

the truth is, not even xiao knows how scared you are. fear and dread soars through your body at the thought of ending up in the same spot you were in last year.

xiao lets out a sigh through his nose at your words, a noise that does nothing other than make you feel worse, especially when you can't read his emotions and tell what's going on in that labyrinth of a brain he has. maybe he's realized that you're not worth spending his time. maybe you really are a loss cause. maybe you really should change your major. maybe you should call it quits and drop out. maybe you should move countries, marry a rich doctor or a lawyer and spend the rest of your days as a glorified housespー

xiao doesn't let you finish your thoughts (plans), instead getting up from his chair slowly. "let's take a break." he says, and while you feel a break is a little undeserved after you haven't done much studying, you nod, thinking it might be best to just relax before jumping back into things. "taking things slowly is the better way to do things," you nod, although the words just barely register themselves in your head. you're surprisingly vulnerable with him.

"I'm... going to step out for a moment to get some air. I'll give you some time for yourself to think." you nod, giving him a small and meek thank you, genuinely so utterly grateful for all the time xiao has given you. you can't help yourself from bothering him just once more before he leaves, though.

"xiao?" you don't look up at him, eyes fixated on your answers and what must've been so wrong with them. you hear him hum, beckoning you to continue.

“do you think I'll be able to pass?”

"of course you will," he answers, and it's the first truth he's said all day.

"of course," he mumbles, this time lower, a reminder to himself of how you'd be completely fine on your own, and that he should never, ever take this opportunity for granted.

he makes a promise to himself that he won't.

----- NEW TEXT MESSAGE -----☆

zhongli: hello, [name]. xiao informed me earlier today that you two will be conducting your first study session today. I'm glad you spoke to him about tutoring like I had advised you to. how are things going?

[name]: it's going fine, he mostly just reaffirmed what you already told me though. but he's been really kind about it all, I'm grateful that he agreed to help me out.

zhongli: I see. I hope that he could give you a new perspective on things and aid you in your weak spots. xiao is an amazing student in his own right, and I'm sure that together, you two will make an amazing team. I'm glad you two are getting along.

zhongli: I'd like to give you a little heads up for a future assignment, but there will be a project upcoming where I'll be sure to partner you two up. I'm sure you two will impress me on what you come up with.

zhongli: I believe in you, [name], and I expect good things coming forward.

zhongli: I'm sure that xiao is grateful as well.

[name]: thank you.

[name]: I hope to meet your standards as best as I can.

-----☆

the apartment is even quieter than it was before without xiao.

it's lonely, too.

in a way, you used this little moment to yourself as a justification and way to figure out just what exactly is the enigma that is xiao. now that you're by yourself, you find yourself looking around at his walls, glancing over at one of the two of his cork boards that seems to have a bunch of what looks to be memorabilia of all sorts, stuff like old music concert tickets of local bands you've never heard of, polaroids with some familiar places and even some of his friends, post-it note scribbles of different tasks he has to get done, among other things.

you visualize yourself looking at the corkboard as though it's those ones in those crime movies, where you're using red yarn to connect the pieces of a story together, figuring out with all the clues you have at your disposal who xiao is.

there's other things, too. posters lining the wall and a singular cat shaped plushie on his bed, a wilted bouquet of flowers in a vase on his kitchen countertop meant for decoration, various little knick knacks on his desk, but the part of his room that catches your eye most, though, is his large, expansive bookshelf filled (a little messily) with a variety of different things, almost all of it stuff you actually recognize.

you’re halfway through looking around before you hear the door open back up again. you instinctually freeze, as of you’re a kid who’s been caught with their hand in the cookie jar. you shift your head, locking eyes with him as he steps back inside. to your surprise, he doesn’t look upset, not even annoyed, just intrigued as he watches you awkwardly shuffle away a little from the bookshelves.

you try to apologize with hast. “sorry, I wasn’t trying to snoop or anything, I swear, I was just–“

xiaos quick to interject as he walks right past you over to sit, this time on his bed instead of at his desk. “it’s fine. I don’t mind. you don’t have to apologize.” he crosses his arms once he’s situated in his seat. “do whatever you’d like.” he adds in an attempt to comfort you.

it sounds sarcastic, but you somehow can tell that it’s not. you nod, taking it as (hoping that it’s) permission to keep going. your eyes move over to the other corkboard near the bookshelves, hoping that you’re not stepping over any boundaries by doing so. this board is filled more with many different photos pinned up onto it. there’s all sorts of sites and places, things like concerts or shops or restaurants or nature– the list goes on– with a rare one or two photos with him actually in it. even rarer seemed to be other people that didn’t look like strangers in the background.

you subconsciously speak a thought aloud. “you seem to go out a lot. to really cool places, too.”

the only thing he really says in response is, “all of those aren’t recent.”

you hum in response, eyebrows furrowing a little as you nod in understanding. “oh, I see.” xiao takes it as an opportunity to ask you something even though he knows the answer already. “what about you? do you go out a lot?”

the question takes you a little aback. “I haven’t gotten out a lot recently either.” you try to think about all you’ve done recently, before realizing there’s nothing much to think about at all. you add, in truth, “…you’re honestly the first person I’ve spent time with in a while that wasn’t my roommate, but I don’t think that really counts.”

he cocks his head to the side at that answer, golden eyes staring at you (almost straight through your soul), intrigued. “why haven’t you spent time with anyone else?

a soft pang hits your heart as you think about the reason. the breakup. despite how much time has gone by, you’re still tender about the topic, and would rather not think about everything it’s caused as a result. would rather not think about him, either.

you let out a nervous laugh. “that’s a long story, I guess.” 

xiao seems dissatisfied with that answer. he’s never responded so quickly, without hesitating before.

“I have time.”

you send a look of slight confusion his way. “I thought we were going to study some more today?”

“right…” xiao let’s a lot of dead air slip in whenever he speaks, pausing and hanging onto words as if he’s doing mental calculations to figure out what the right thing to say next. “…in the future, then.”

you nod as your eye continues it’s adventure through the board before another photo catches your attention fully. it’s a pretty photo of a bunch of people standing near the docks, holding up and letting go of lanterns. it looks like, judging from the date scribbled on the bottom of the photo and the contents of the photo itself, the annual lantern rite from a few years back. you remember that day, almost vividly, too. that was your first year at the school. you and venti had gone together that year. it was magical. it seems like xiao really was never too far from you. seriously, you’re surprised you two haven’t talked sooner.

you can’t help but smile as you reminisce on that day. “I remember this exact lantern rite. there was so many people, and the lanterns were so beautiful. they always are.”

you turn around to face him, again. “how long has it been since you’ve gone to the harbor? if I lived as close as you do, I think I’d go to the harbor whenever I have time.”

it takes awhile for xiao to respond, not because he’s thinking of an answer, but because he’s transfixed on your expression right now. you seem so happy that it naturally just pulls on his heart strings. he’s glad you still remember that particular lantern rite, even though he knows you’ve gone to more since then. xiao remembers that day visibly too, but probably (definitely) not for the same you do. he wonders if you remember that part of it deep inside.

“um… since the day of that photo, probably.”

you’re a little taken aback from that answer. xiao lives on the outskirts of the harbor. how could he have not gone back in years? everything you learn about xiao makes you more and more curious as to who he is. “really?” you can’t help but ask. he can’t help but shrug.

you speak without even thinking twice once more. “would you want to go again sometime then?” your eyes dart away from his face. you can’t help but look away before you finish the question, unable to look him in the eye as you clarify, “with me, I mean.” you stumble out the words more confidently than you exprcted. 

he lets out a sigh. “there’s nothing I want from there…” it’s the truth. he hasn’t been very fond of the harbor for what has felt like centuries, especially not the memories he’s tethered to. he can’t help but to regret the accidental roughness of his words, though, when he looks up to see a flash of embarrassment paint across your face. it feels like he picked the wrong answer, but he wants to say the right one, desperately. xiao has never been great at talking, but he’s trying, for you. “but if you’d like… I’d like to go with you.”

you try to hide the way your heart picks up the pace a little at his words. “let’s go soon, then. I can tell you about myself, and you can tell me about you, too.”

he nods, and for a split second you think you’ve gone insane, because you swear, swear, that for a few seconds, the corner of xiao’s lips curve softly into a smile. a smile! smiling at the thought of you two ‘hanging out’ in the future! for all the times you’ve seen xiao, you can maybe only count on one hand how many times you’ve seen him smile. 

“you want to learn about me?” he asks, earnestly, shocked, and it definitely wasn’t a question you were expecting.

“yeah, I mean I've always seen you around. I think we've even been in the same classes before this year, too, and now I’m getting tutored by you  and I still know pretty much nothing about you.” you pause before adding on, “I’d love to learn more. I hope that’s not weird, or anything.”

he shakes his head, the ghost of a smile still etched onto his lips. and if you looked closely (which luckily for him, you weren’t), you’d see the faint dust of blush decorating his cheeks, too. “I don’t have much to tell you, but… that sounds good.”

he feels embarrassed at the fact he can’t control how warm his cheeks feel and how he can’t help but crack a smile at you. he clears his throat, trying to reset himself, suddenly ready to move on, going back to his desk. 

“let’s keep working, I want to make the most out of the time we have together.” he doesn’t look at you as he speaks. you mentally brace yourself for another study session with him.

it’s gonna be a long night.

ーーー NEW MESSAGE ーーー ☆

ven: where have you been?

ven: haven’t seen you all day……….. ):

ven: my flower, the house is so empty without you……….. ))):

ven: are you with somebody? you never tell me these things anymore.

ven: talk to me soon, please.

ーーー ☆

it's late into the night when you're awakened rudely with a few desperate knocks against your bedroom door.

you can't help but groan as you stir awake, upset to be forced out of your dream state, although that irritation is soon replaced with guilt once you realize just why you were being awakened with such urgency in the first place. after whining out a loud, 'come in,' you peak your eyes open to see your best friend standing in your doorway, tears staining his face so much that they're visible even in the darkness.

shit. it's been so long since you've seen venti like this. you thought all of that was over ages ago.

"can I sleep with you tonight?" his voice is shakey yet gentle, filled with fear and something that you can only label as... need, as if he needs you more than he ever has. just his voice alone, paired with the way he looks so in the doorway while he's shivering and fiddling with his pajamas, hair looking almost as distraught as he's feeling, is enough to have you too stunned to speak.

"please?" he adds on when you don't reply immediately.

you nod, scooting over to make room for him as he slowly trudges to your bed like he's done many times before. he's quick to settle in under the covers with you, laying against the plush pillow underneath him. you move closer to him as though it's instinct, an action done out of retained muscle memory from the many nights you've spent doing this exact thing. your eyes, though half lidded and heavy, trace over his face over and over again, noting how his eyes look back at you and you can't help but think that venti is such an expressive person. even if he's so silent right now, his eyes are cloudy and storming, speaking a thousand words with the thunder that rings out within them.

he looks like he's trying to think of what to say, but he doesn't need to say a single thing. you already know why he's here.

his face is contorted in a way that almost showcases utter agony, and it hurts, hurts to see your best friend suffering, especially when the best you can do is guide your hand softly against the smooth the skin of his cheek and brushing away any tears in pity. if nothing else, you truly do hope that, at the very least, your presence can help.

“do you maybe want to talk about it?” you run your hand through his soft, pretty dyed blue locks that seem to almost glow in the moonlight, feeling the light moisture of his skin from his sweat. you’ve forgotten just how easy it always has been to brush your hand through his locks. your voice is gentle and low as if not to startle him, as if not to shatter him more than he already is. “you know you don’t have to, but you can always talk to me if you need to.”

“no, it’s okay... I just want to be with you right now.” his voice is meek as he chooses his words carefully as though they're meticulously chosen to pull at your heartstrings (they do), and he sounds like he’s on the brink of tears once more.

“is it the same dream as before?” you ask, remembering how many nights you've spent with venti just like this when he began getting frequent ‘nightmares’ awhile back, nightmares that till this day you don't know the contents of.

he nods, although hesitantly, as though it’s some sort of secret. and in a way, it is.

he could never, ever, ever tell you that you’re the cause of all of his nightmares after all.

“are you sure you don’t want to talk about it? you look really upset. you've never told me what makes you like this.”

“no, I just want to… I just want to stay like this for a while.”

“okay, ven,” you whisper, soft and quiet, as if your voice could shatter him whole. you pause, thinking of what to say, before you decide that you won’t prode any further, instead bidding him a goodnight. “I love you, venti. get some rest.”

for the first time in maybe months, venti doesn’t tell you he loves you back.

instead he burrows himself as deep as humanly possible, as if being torn away from you would kill him, just like the way his dreams pulled and tugged ruthlessly at his heart strings, shoving images of you with your new 'tutor' down his throat, like they had with him months and months ago.

how cruel is it that he's forced to see you being ripped away from him both in real life and in his dreams?

-----☆

you're half asleep when you feel him mumble into your skin.

"I miss you. I miss this." he whispers, but you can barely hear him. he misses the way you feel, how comforting you smell, how his hands connect with your body like they're puzzle pieces. he misses having all your attention on him like this, so quick to coo and ask if he's okay. everything’s changed from how it used to be.

"what?"

you feel venti's hands slip under your shirt, feeling the warm skin of your back as he slowly trails his hands up and down, basking in the way that you feel. "I miss you, cecilia. especially today." his voice isn't shakey anymore. instead it's much more fluid, as though he never had the night terrors that brought him into your room to begin with. you can't help but frown at his words even in your sleepy state.

"venti..." you mumble out, feeling his hands start to dig themselves into your skin. his grip on your waist is tightー not enough for it to hurt, but just enough that it keeps you from pushing him away if you really wanted to, trapping and suffocating you, bordering the lines of sucking the air out of your lungs.

part of you wishes he wouldn't keep things so bottled up from you, because clearly, your constant 'absence' in his life is hurting him more than you'll ever be able to understand, but the more selfish part of you is shamefully grateful that he is. you love venti, but for a man who constantly champions for freedom, he's always been so dead set on taking away yours.

you know deep down that if you gave venti an inch, he'd take a mile, and you don't have many miles left to give. you could spend twenty-four hours of a day with venti and he would still want you to somehow spend twenty-five on him. as much as you love ventiー truly, you love him more than anything else in the worldー, you know it'd be better if you didn't indulge him as much as you want him to. lord knows how quick venti would be to turn you into a hollow, empty shell of yourself by taking every second you have all for himself if he could.

besides, this whole thing will blow over eventually after the party, right?

right?

"I know that I've already whined and complained about it, but god, I miss you. you were gone for so long today with someone I don't even know… seeing you occasionally here and there isn't enough for me. I..." venti somehow manages to pull his body even closer to you, your chest and his chest plush against each other, so close that you can feel the way it rises as he breathes slowly. "I know I'm selfish, but I need you."

he says the word 'need' as if he'd die without you.

you don't think this is a conversation you two should be having when you're so... out of it, exhausted.

"venti, can we talk about this in the morning?"

his grip slowly loosens. "...okay." he says the word slowly and hesitantly, as if he's a child saying a cuss word for the first time, as if agreeing to put his feelings aside until you're in a much more lucid and conscious state is a sin. "I'm... I'm sorry for bothering you and being so clingy and... I just..." venti swallows thickly. "goodnight," venti mumbles, choosing not to finish his thought.

your eyebrows furrow, something about this whole conversation feeling off to you. never in a million years would venti have been so... upfront, apart from the day he invited you to the party. it's like venti's slowly unraveling like a string, just one little tug away from snapping.

it wouldn't be the first time venti's snapped on you though. you need to mend things and shut off the ticking time bomb before things blow up in your face again, like when you...

like when you...

ugh. you'll think about all of this later when you're actually well-rested and capable of forming cohesive thoughts. you softly mumble out a goodnight to venti as well, praying that the storm will blow off soon enough.

it doesn't, though. the winds only get stronger and louder.

ーーー☆

venti wasn't in your room by the time you woke up. infact, he wasn't in the apartment at all. not in his room, not in the kitchen or in the bathroom getting ready, nowhere. he didn't even leave a text telling you where he went.

you guess that venti needs time to think after last night, and you decide that it's probably for the best.

you'll see him again later anyways.

ーーー☆

it's cold out today, october's chill punishing you for wearing too light of a sweater for the weather, but the freezing temperature of the classroom during today's lecture isn't the cause of the way you squirm in your seat out of discomfort. no, you have professor zhongli to take credit for that.

you're convinced that zhongli gets a kick out of giving you borderline heart attacks.

honestly, that isn't exactly far from the truth. there's something about the way your eyes flicker in complete, utter fear just by him saying, "[name], may you please see me after class? there's something I'd like to discuss with you," that sends shivers down his spine, as egregious as that may sound. it's a shameful feeling for a professor to have, but at least he has much more innocent intentions this time as opposed to the last time he's asked you to stay behind.

the request was given to you right at the start of class (which you were actually on time to, thank god) before he began with his lecture. and once again, you couldn't help but think about just what exactly zhongli wanted to discuss with you throughout the entire lecture, almost too busy coming up with theories to focus. all you can think is, did you do something wrong again? was the assignment you turned in last night bad? all that studying you did with xiao couldn’t have been for nothing, right? you're going to fail the semester at this rate.

you wish zhongli was more dead set on helping you pass like last year than assuring that you failed.

you can’t help but call back to that time. you had been much worse off back then. you were visibly behind everyone else, but it hadn't started that way. so much was happening back then. and that breakup, oh that fucking break up, really made focusing on your school work beyond difficult. you truly did put up a fight, tried to make sure you stayed afloat, and it did work at first. but your responsibilities drowned you completely, and you never really learned how to swim.

it was a rough semester, and one of your classes had been taught by the very same man taking great pleasure in ruining you today. your one saving grace? once again, the very same man, who had seemed to take enough pity onto you that he took matters into his own hands to make sure you did well.

you stood out back then, not because you shone bright, but because you didn't shine at all.

zhongli wanted to light that fire back in you that you had at the start of the year. and he had.

zhongli had took you under his wing, struck you with passion and drive, made you fall in love all over again with the topic you were studying through his ramblings and stories and sheer utter knowledge; he revitalized you, filled a hole. he had kept you after class and in his office on weekends, making time to make sure that you succeeded and through his gentle nurturing that was the hot to his own cold. you had succeeded, to your surprise. and he had looked after you ever since.

it was silly for you to believe that he would grace you with the same mercy this course.

but things are different now. so much more different. you were grateful back then for him striving to push you to do better, but now it's overwhelming. back then, his standards were achievableー finish your assignments on time as often as you could, study a little when you can, at least attempt to attend every class you had. it was doable. but now, now you're almost convinced he wants you to become borderline perfectー no, perfect is an understatement. he wants you to be better than perfect.

perfect, and vulnerable.

back then it felt as though he was trying to help you but now, the back of your mind can't help but tell you that he's always been helping himself, benefiting himself, not you.

it was at the start of this school year that you let yourself fall right into the dragon's lair.

either way, maybe it's the fact that your mind was so occupied, or maybe time simply just decided to speed up, but the class flew by in no time. you had practically tuned out all of zhongli's ramblings and teachings today. you watched zhongli dismiss the class, staying seated despite the way everyone else shuffled out of the door as quickly as possible. once again, it was just you and zhongli in the empty room.

fuck.

zhongli walks to the front of your desk, running a hand through his hair before letting out a long sigh, and you never knew how such a little harmless action could strike so much fear into your heart. could you just combust already? you're not at all ready for whatever zhongli has to say.

"what a long class we had today, hm? I hope I didn't bore you too much. you looked particularly distracted." zhongli says, smiling gently at you as he attempts to brighten the gloomy mood you're clearly in. "luckily, though, I've been excited to talk to you all class. you truly were my saving grace today."

is this some kind of sick joke? you were kidding when you thought zhongli must get pleasure out of your failure, but you might actually be right.

gross.

"don't worry, though, I didn't keep you after class just to complain. I'll get to the point, since I know you hate pointless chatter."

"I know it's far too early to say this, but I'm proud of you, [name]."

that caring nature still shines through, the strict professor he's supposed to be eroded and washed away by time itself.

your eyebrows furrow. "what?" you can’t help but let the word slip out of your mouth in the midst of your confusion.

"the assignment you gave in last night, truly one of your best works this semester. you never fail to amaze me with how fast you manage to make a turnaround when you put your mind to it, [name]."

the assignment? the one you worked on last night at the last second despite having over a week to do it after studying with xiao that you had to keep your eyes pried open to complete? the one xiao had borderline picked apart a dozen times as though trying to break you down even more? that assignment?

what?

"but I... what? if it was any good, it's likely only because xiao was there to help me." you mumble, unsure of your words.

"so? are you really diminishing your accomplishments just because you got a little aid?" zhongli plants a hand on your cheek like he has a dozen times in the past before guiding your face to look up at him. "or are you trying to say that it was xiao who had done your assignment, not you?"

"o-of course he didn't, but-" zhongli is quick to shush you, pressing a gloved thumb against your lips with a soft smile.

"shh. you did well, and that's final. I hope this pattern continues. you know I want nothing but the best for you after seeing what you can achieve." his gloved hand caresses your cheek and you're convinced he can feel the heat your face is producing out of embarrassment even through the layer of fabric. "my little star, you're doing well again." he adds quietly, so quietly that you can just barely make it out, though the nickname is far less shocking than the praise that your brain is still trying to make sense of.

"before I let you go, I just wanted to reiterate that should you ever need my assistance with anythingー and I mean anything at all, whether it's related to your academics or notー know that I am and always will be here."

"I... thank you." it's the only words you can come up with as zhongli leaves you alone with your thoughts. "thank you," you repeat, speaking the words much more quietly. in a hushed whisper.

in the back of your mind, you realize that you should be thinking about how odd it is for zhongli to suddenly be so sugary sweet, how he's touched you so much more intimately than a professor should, how his little nickname for you is weird at best, and yet all you can think about is how he's proud of you.

for some reason, that's all that really matters to you in the moment. you can think about... all that other stuff, later.

ーーー☆

it's almost pitch dark out by the time you finally get home. 

"I'm home!" you shout out as soon as you step through the front door, voice a little breathy after having to climb up a few flights of stairs to get up to your apartment, alerting venti that you've arrived in a way akin to how married couples do. you're quick to lock the door behind you, stripping yourself of your shoes that feel more like weights before placing them in the shoe rack near the door and putting your heavy bag down next to venti's violin case, deciding you'll bother with getting whatever you need out of there when you feel like it. you wince a little at the cold tiles of the floor underneath your feet.

maybe one day you'll move into a place with an actual heater, you think.

"I'll be there in just a second!" venti's voice rings out from what you assume is the bathroom down the hall, likely showering given the pitter-pattering sound of running water. you nod, as though responding to him despite the fact he can't see you, flicking on the light switch to the kitchen as you do so. the kitchen table immediately grabs your attention with how different it looks compared to how you left it this morning. two orange pumpkins sit at the center, and alongside it lays an unopened package of carving tools and another package of tea lights, a brown bag filled with what looks to be some house decor and knick knacks (venti truly does love trying to make your run-down apartment as much of a true home as possible), and a bag of groceries yet to be put away.

you sit down at the medium sized wooden table, allowing yourself to rest and bask in the day as you look through everything infront of you. it's been awhile since you've just sat in silence and thought, and even longer since you let yourself really live in this home without just heading straight to your room. your nails drill against the table, pushing one of the two pumpkins closer to you with a soft hum. you trace a finger against it, imaginging what'd you want to carve on it and how it'd glow after you put a candle inside.

this year you should do something new, get a little more fancier with the design that you have in the previous years that you craved a pumpkin. maybe you and venti will carve matching jack-o-laterns this year. you can't help but smile at the thought.

"they're cute, aren't they?"

you tense up when you feel a hand on your shoulder, but you instantly relax when you turn your head to see venti. you guess you were so lost in thought you hadn't heard him come out of the bathroom. you drink in his presence, giving him a glance over out of instinct. the smell of his apple-cinnamon bodywash assault your senses in an oddly comforting way, a scent that makes you feel right at home. he's in a pair pajamas and cute bunny slippers, and his hair is clipped up in a pretty half up, half down ponytail. the blue dyed tips of his hair are losing their signature color (which is odd, considering that despite his inherit laziness, venti's always been one to make sure those tips stay bright blue at all costs) and his skin looks a little damp.

a gummy smile paints his face, and he has a bit of a playful glint in his eye, but he looks notably tired, and a sense of worry pings at your heart at the sight. you were the roommate notorious for having bags under your eyes afterall, not him, so to see him look so exhausted, especially when venti's always been one for getting his 'beauty sleep,' tells you that venti internally isn't feeling his best. it sounds shallow, judging someone's mental health based on their appearance, but you know venti like the back of your hand, and you know that something's wrong.

even moreso, you know exactly what that wrong thing is, given last night's conversation.

"I got them at the grocery store today. thought it might be fun to carve them together before they go bad. that is, if you want to grace me with your undivided time and attention, of course." venti pretends he's joking, but you know deep down he means the sentiment of wanting you to give him your time for once, and you honestly feel awful at his words. nonetheless, you suck it up, smiling up at him. it's a genuine smile.

"why wouldn't I? it is tradition after all. I'm going to make mine extra scary this year."

venti laughs at your words, his heart internally flutter at the thought of how determined your face would look as you try to create the spookiest jack-o-latern he's ever seen. he leans down, pressing a soft, platonic peck to your forehead, finally giving you a welcome home.

"you're home later than usual again, everything go okay?"

you can't help but notice that venti is acting as if he had never said what he said last night, though the air between you is still awkward and tense, and his face does little to hide the fact that deep down, he's still quelling on the things he spoke about. nonetheless, you decide that that conversation is to be had when venti wants it to happen, knowing full well from years of being his best friend that venti prefers keeping a lighter mood at all costs, so you leave things at that until he's ready to speak about it again.

"yeah, I just thought that I'd try to get some work done while I could at campus," you answer, watching as he nods slowly at your words. you can tell he's fighting back the urge to interrogate you, to ask you if you were with anybody and if you really needed to stay at campus, and anything else he can use as a way to rationalize the fact that he's so clingy. he looks around the room, thinking about what else he could say to make sure the conversation doesn't end prematurely.

"oh! I ordered some takeout a bit before you came home. it's still hot, if you want to eat."

you nod, thanking him, and you can tell he's trying to read you, to figure out just how exactly he can stay with you longer without him bringing up anything you two talked about last night. he stands there, presence lingering as though he has something to say, and yet he chooses not to say whatever's on his mind, instead preferring to pick up the unopened bottle of dandelion wine on the nearby kitchen counter.

"you seem all set. I'll get going now, then. I have an urgent date with a bottle of wine that I can't miss for the world." venti moves quickly to leave as though trying to make sure you don't see through to him, turning his back to you without another word, but he doesn't get too far before he's freezing up at your words.

"you're not gonna stay and chat?" you say instinctively, a little surprised by the fact he was so quick to come and go today. you don't know what it is about today, but the thought of venti forcing himself to go when he clearly doesn't want to pains you. maybe it was last night's conversation, or maybe it's how venti radiates warmth that fights against the biting cold that nips at your skin, or maybe you just miss venti, but you want him here with you.

venti turns around slowly, his voice low as he speaks. "oh..." he starts off, "I thought you would've wanted to eat alone like all the other nights," you almost let out a wince at his words. how long has it really been since you last simply hung out with venti? "do you... want me to stay?" you let out a gentle hum.

"I want you here tonight. I want to talk to you."

"about what?"

you think about everything you'd want to tell venti, and you realize that that's exactly it; you want to tell him everything and anything you can. you want to tell him about your new tutor who turned out to be a lot less scary than you were expecting him to be, or that new coffee shop a friend had told you about that opened up near by that you'd love to tell him about, or how zhongli was actually kind to you today. but you also want venti to tell you everything too, about any escapades he's had recently while drunk or new songs he's written, or even how his classes are going and if he's thinking of going to any other parties soon.

you realize that, as much as you'd hate to admit it to yourself, you miss just being with venti a lot too.

"everything," you finally reply after thinking, grinning up at his hesitant form.

"everything? really? this isn't a ploy to tell me horrific news or to try to get out of going to that party, is it?"

"no, I promise. I'm honestly a bit offended you'd think I'd ever be so cruel as to try to get out of going to such an amazing party," you joke.

venti playfully rolls his eyes at your words, but he can't help the smile that creeps up his face. his smile is bright like a star, warm enough for a planet to survive off of, eyelids crinkling at the corners of his eyes as he puts the bottle in his hand down befofe he pulls up one of the kitchen chairs, the legs screeching against the floor so that he's sitting infront of you. he leans in close to you as though you were about to tell him the greatest story known to man. you can't help but feel warm and fuzzy inside. venti's smile, his real and genuine smile, gives you a feeling like no other. it makes you feel whole, like none of your problems neither exist nor matter and that everything in this world is perfect.

"okay then, dove, tell me everything."

ーーー NEW TEXT MESSAGE ーーー☆

alatus: can you believe it's almost sunday already?

[name]: holy shit, time is going by so fast

[name]: I'm so excited to meet you in person

alatus: I'm excited too.

[name]: I can't believe I've known you for over a year and I'm only going to get to see your face now

[name]: I swear, if you're just some creep...

alatus: I promise I'm not.

alatus: well, maybe.

[name]: ha ha, very funny.

[name]: but seriously, it honestly feels like I've known you for forever.

alatus: maybe you have and you just never noticed

[agozzs]

- Kaomoji - Symbols - Bios ! !

Bios ! 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘀𝗲 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘴 : ?! 𖦹︎ ִֶָ ࣪ ៹ ☄️

૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა ./づᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊° i shoot u >:(

૮꒰ ˶> ༝ <˶꒱ა ./づᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊°.~♡︎ with love tho-

🦢 name ༘⋆

𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ prns 🪞

🥛extra ⋆⑅˚₊

🐌 ੭﹕ ̊ ̟ ꒷꒦

𝑜ℎ, 𝑤ℎ𝑜 𝑖𝑠 𝑠ℎ𝑒? (name)🪐(prns) 𝑎 𝑚𝑖𝑠𝑡𝑦 𝑚𝑒𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑦… (text)🕰(text) ੭﹕ ̊ ̟ ꒷꒦ 🩹

≡^∇^≡ (𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦) !! ↓✭ (𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘴) ⚊ (𝘢𝘨𝘦) ೄྀ ≫ (𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵) <3

🤍 , ♡ 𝟭𝟮 | 𝟬𝟵 |𝟬𝟱 𓂃命

𖥻 ✿ - ᴘʀᴏ ɴᴏᴜɴꜱ ⇢˚⋆

꒰ ➶ ꒱ e n g e n e 𓍢𝅄🥡🥢٫ ໋ ᘏ ،

❕𝙣𝙞𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙢𝙪𝙧𝙖 𝘳𝘪𝘬𝘪❕（歡迎） ★ | 𝖘𝖔𝖗𝖗𝖞 𝕴'𝖒 𝖆𝖓 𝖆𝖓𝖙𝖎 𝖗𝖔𝖒𝖆𝖓𝖙𝖎𝖈 Ꮺ ૮꒰ ˶• . •˶꒱ა     [ 안티 로맨틱 ] ./づᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊°.~ 💣

ꗃ 𝐔𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐄 :: 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 , 𝗻𝗶𝗰𝗸𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 ~ 𝘉𝘌𝘌𝘕 𝘞𝘙𝘌𝘈𝘒𝘐𝘕𝘎 𝘏𝘈𝘝𝘖𝘊 𝘚𝘐𝘕𝘊𝘌 0000  🎓  𝐈'𝐌 𝐀 𝐅/𝐌/𝐍𝐁 𝐁𝐈𝐓𝐂𝐇 𝐎𝐊𝐀𝐘 ?

★ | 𝖘𝖔𝖗𝖗𝖞 𝕴 𝖉𝖔𝖓'𝖙 𝖙𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖙 𝖞𝖔𝖚 𝖑𝖎𝖐𝖊 𝖆 𝖌𝖔𝖉𝖉𝖊𝖘𝖘 ૮₍˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶₎ა          [ 여신처럼 ] ./づᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏 💣

꒰ 🥄 ⊹ ˚ . 𝚑𝚎/𝚑𝚒𝚖 𖧧 🌷७ 🍼୨♡୧ ִ° ⋆ 𝙨𝙛𝙬 | 𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙤𝙧 𝘣𝘢𝘣𝘺 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬 ʚ🌸ɞ ꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱

Kaomoji ! ૮ ˶´ ᵕˋ ˶ა ʚ(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ ૮₍˶ •. • ⑅₎ა ♡ (っ- ‸ - ς) (๑ᵔ⤙ᵔ๑) ૮⸝⸝> ̫ <⸝⸝ ა ૮ ◞ ﻌ ◟ ა ଘ(˵╹-╹)━☆ ₍⑅ᐢ..ᐢ₎ ღゝ◡╹)ノ♡ ૮₍˶Ó﹏Ò ⑅₎ა ପ૮๑ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ๑ აଓ (>᎑<๑)/♡ Symbols !

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: :･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ✧ .・゜゜・　　・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･　　 ･ﾟﾟ･｡ ˖⁺｡˚⋆˙✧⋆｡°⋆࿓ ⋆｡°✩☾⋆｡°✩

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. ࿐࿔ 　　　.   　　˚　　 　　*　　 　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　 ˚　.˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　 　　 　　　　 ੈ✧̣̇˳·˖✶ ✦　　

┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ✫ ˚♡ ⋆｡ ❀ ┊ ☪︎⋆ ⊹ 𓆩♡𓆪 : ̗̀➛ ׂׂૢ ╰┈➤ ✎ - ,, -‘๑’- ・❥・ ༊*·˚ ˗ˏˋ ´ˎ˗ ☄. *. ⋆ ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ✧.* ೃ⁀➷ ⋆·˚ ༘ * ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ·˚ ༘ *ೃ༄ .ೃ࿐ ੈ✩‧₊˚ ⋆.ೃ࿔:･ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ┊͙ ˘͈ᵕ˘͈ ⍣ ೋ ‗ ❍ ¡! ❞ ﹌﹌﹌ 彡 ▓ ღ ꕥ ‿‿‿‿ *+:｡.｡ •·.·''·.·• ·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ * ˚ ✦ ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ- . . . . . ╰──╮ ╭──╯ . . . . . ↳ ❝ [] ¡! ❞ - ͙۪۪̥˚┊❛ ❜┊˚ ͙۪۪̥◌ ✧˚ · . ˚ · . ༉‧₊˚. '•.¸♡ ♡¸.•' +:ꔫ:﹤ ﹥:ꔫ:+ﾟ ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: :･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ ୨୧ ⇢ ˗ˏˋ ࿐ྂ ≡;- ꒰ ° ꒱ ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫

˚𖦹🍈 ꒱ 最小限 ⋆⠀҂҂⠀๑⠀، 🌷᜔ׄ୭ 𝒥. ⌇ 🍡 ⊹ 𝟢𝟧. ★̶̲ ⸝ 📠 ˴ 그대 ! › ✧. 𓏸𓈒 riki・리키 ᵎ “⌕

ㆍ﹒ ╴・：י ﹕ ﹢ ﹐ ﹗ ﹠ ﹪ ﹙ ﹚︔ ︉？﹔◞ ◟ ◝ ◜﹫『』 ！〝 〞〈 〉（ ）﹔ ⌇ ㆍ﹒╴・：﹕﹢﹐﹗ ‹𝟹 ﹠ ﹪﹙﹚︔ ︉？﹔◞ ◟ ◝ ◜﹫『』 ！〝 〞〈 〉（ ），．｜╵ ✶ ⿴ ⊞ ★ ＞＜ ʬ ↻ ∇ ◌ ⟡ ☆ ⊹ ♡ ✦ ⬚ ⇆ ∇ ✸ ᶻ ⌔ ✧ ⿻ ⧉ ❍ ⭓ ⭔ ◫ ◖⌗⟢ ━ ∪ ∩ ≧ ≦ ⋏ ⋒ ⨳ ⩇ ⌘ ⌂ ⌦ ⌧ ✓ ✘ ✕ ✗ ⍤ ⍨ ◕ ◉ ● ⭓ ⭔ ⚣ ⚢ ⪩⪨ ♬ ♫ ♪ ✎ ✄ ⍝ ◓ ◒ ◐ ◌ ◍ ◔ ◕ ▞ ■ ◯ ◰ ◱ ◲ ◳ ◴ ◵ ◶ ◷ ⊕ ⊘ ⊚ ⊧ ⊳ ⊠ ⊟ ♰ ✟ † ⸸ (\ /) 🗦 🗧♔ ♕ ♚ ♛ ᶻz ʬʬ ⿻ ▞ 🜲 ⋋ ✽ ✾ ✿ ❀ ❁ ❃ ❊ ❋ ▥ ▤ ▦ ▧ ▨ ▩ ░ ▒ ▓ ❥︴﹢﹐﹗﹒﹕﹑﹔！﹟﹙ ﹚％ ╴﹫﹖・◝ ◜╯╮╰╭◞ ◟？× ᵎᵎ ⌕ ‹ › ▹⬦ ↀ ₍ ₎ ₊ ✦ ꜜ ！˚₊ ‹3﹒⧜ ˃ ︿ ˂ ︵ ⊹ ・ ˶ ᵔᵔ ᵕ ᴗ /) ・ 🎕︰ ⨝ ⨞ ⨟ ⨯ ⨼ ⨽ ⩇ ⩈ ⩉ ⩊ ⩋ ⩌ ⩍ ⩐ ⩑ ⩟ ⩠ ⩢ ⩣ ⩨ ⩩ ⪦ ⪧ ⪨ ⪩ ⪽ ⪾ ⪿ ⫀ ⫁ ⫂ ⫃ ⫄ ⫍ ⫎ ⫏ ⫐ ⫑ ⫒ ⫝̸ ⫝ ⫯ ⫰ ⫶ ⫻ ⫾ ⫿ ﹙﹚ ？ ！ ☆ ⌗◐ ▞ ⬦ ■ ▬ ⌕ ⸝⸝ ◒ ▢ ▱▰ ◖ ◗. ✿❀ ▭ ➜ ⭔ ✦ ◒ ﹕﹐ ⩇ ⋆ ◖י ⵌ ！◜◟ ˃˂ ▨﹢⊹﹒♡﹒✿﹢﹒≋♡﹐◎﹒∇﹒⊂⊃﹐﹢﹑⟡→﹐✶ ⌔﹒▒﹑﹐≋﹙✿﹢ ❀，﹒⬦ ﹢❀ ﹒ ⪩⪨﹒ ✿ ⨳ ✷ ▨ ♡ ▩ ★ ░▹ ➜ ◖ ◗ ☆ ⪩⪨ ﹑ ⊂⊃ ⭔ ◎ ⋌﹒⬭﹒⅄﹒❋﹒◌﹒⟢﹒∯﹒⊞﹒⬚﹒⊏﹒❁﹒⊢﹒⭒﹒⌑﹒❁﹒✢﹒⁁﹒✾﹒⏆﹒♩﹒∮﹒➷﹒↦﹒✤﹒⊓﹒◯﹒⁂﹒∯﹒❍﹒✬﹒∫﹒∬﹒✺﹒┈﹒✧﹒✩﹒✽﹒♬﹒⿸﹒⌅﹒＋ ⁁ ✾ ∮ ➷ ↦ ✤ ⊓ ◯ ⁂ ❍ ✬ ✺ ┈ ✧ ✩ ⋌ ⬭⅄ ❋ ◌ ⟢ ⊞ ⬚ ⊏ ⊢ ❁﹒✢ ✽ ♬ 𓇼 ⿸ ⌅ ＋⭒⌑ ∫ ∬ ∯ ⟡﹒ꜜ﹐≧≦﹒⊞﹐ ✮﹒∬﹐ ✩﹒➷﹐—﹒⛶﹐◫﹒ ❀﹐ᐢ..ᐢ﹒⎙﹐✿﹒◌﹒ ♡﹒▣﹐✢﹒✧﹐♬﹒❁﹐ ∯﹒❰❰﹒❍﹐✵﹒⬚﹐ ❊﹐⌓﹐✄﹒▢﹐✹﹒ ≥﹐↝﹐���﹐𓂋﹐ꊞ - CREDITOS A SUS AUTORES ORIGINALES -

[agentdilfhotchner]

random question.. do you have any hotchniss headcanons? 🫣

// okay, so i do not ship hotchniss as much as jemily, BUT i do think they’d be really good together, soo i wanted to throw my thoughts about this power couple out there. this is also my first time doing something like this so i apologize if it’s ass ✨🫶

MY HOTCHNISS HEADCANONS:

ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏~♡˚॰°ₒ৹๐

- Emily and Aaron both took dance when they were younger. Hotch was kinda forced to by his mother but secretly liked it, especially the being partnered up with pretty girls part. Emily was a full on pro ballerina by age nine. She still takes ballet classes in her free time because it helps ease anxiety. Definitely giving black widow movie vibes, like spy AND ballerina, we love to see it. Anyway, they bond over this when they first get together and decided to take couples classes. They do anything from salsa dancing to tap, Emily even persuades Hotch to take a dirty dancing class, AND HE IS ACTUALLY REALLY GOOD?!? The man is so tender and likes to take his time in a relationship so the intimacy in dirty dancing is like second nature to him and Emily definitely isn’t mad about it.

- They are both very much married to their work so every now and then they have to take a step back and remind themselves, and sometimes each other, that work isn’t the most important thing anymore. Hotch is actually better at making time because he’s had so many years with Jack. I also like to think that Emily is the Unit Chief and Aaron has semi retired but helps consult on cases across the country by the time they get together. Emily is definitely in charge of planning trips for the two of them, plus Jack whenever he wants to tag along.

- very much the definition of ‘touch him/her and i’ll kill you.’ vibes. They are both VERY passionate creatures and do get jealous often. Definitely not in a toxic way, they just love each other so much and never want the other to feel disrespected. Hotch will always have a hand on the small of her back when they are walking together. Emily eats ALL of it up cause her man is completely whipped for her.

- Aaron goes absolutely feral when Emily speaks French or any other language. He literally turns into Gomez Addams and is just like ‘My wife is the most gorgeous, smartest person to ever live!’

- Emily instantly connects with Jack because although her mother is still alive, Emily rarely got to spend time with her. So she definitely feels like she is healing a part of her younger self by being there for Jack. I don’t see Aaron and Emily having kids of their own. Jack being enough for Aaron and Emily maybe feeling as though she wouldn’t be a good mother. Aaron tells her how ridiculous that is because she’s a natural with Jack, but ultimately they decided to just focus on raising him.

- Emily does have five fur babies to take care of though. Soon after her and Aaron got married he gifted her with a cat he adopted from the pound. Little did he or the vet at the pound know that the cat was pregnant, so a couple months later the Hotchner family discovered a little surprise in the form of six baby kittens. Aaron talked Emily into giving two of them away, one to Spencer and one to JJ, but Emily insisted on keeping the rest. Of course Aaron couldn’t say no to her 🫶

- Aaron has a lot of PTSD from what happened with Haley. He has night terrors sometimes so bad that Emily finds him shaking and sobbing in his sleep some nights. If Emily takes to long running errands or maybe doesn’t answer a text over a certain amount of time Aaron’s anxiety sky rockets. But Emily is so patient with him. Staying up late to soothe him and going with him to his therapy sessions just to hold his hand in the waiting room. She’s his number one supporter and he doesn’t take that for granted.

[chilumitos]

✦⁎°₊•ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏 * + .♡ baby it's all your if you want me, all yours if you want me 🐈‍⬛ ★__★

[guilty-ff]

Fading Shadows: Love and Betrayal Pt.2

ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏 ˚⁎⁺˳ .

In a Task Force 141 operation, Soap sacrifices himself to save Simon, introducing tension in Simon and your relationship. Simon's emotional withdrawal escalates, leading to a heated argument where hurtful words are exchanged. You decide to end the relationship, leaving Simon to grapple with the consequences of his actions and the loss of both Soap and Y/n.

Pairings: fem!reader, Simon Riley, König

Genre: mild angst

Tags: MW3 Spoilers, angst, anxiety, break up, independent

The chasm between you and Simon widens with each passing day, the once seamless partnership now fractured by unspoken tensions. At work, the air becomes charged with the remnants of what was, and the camaraderie that defined your relationship on missions results into an uncomfortable silence.

Unable to bear the strain any longer, you decide to take the matter to Captain Price. Knocking on his office door, you wait for the permission to enter.

"Captain, we need to talk."

Price glances up from his paperwork, recognizing the seriousness in your expression. He gestures for you to sit, prompting you to share your concerns.

"What's going on, Sergeant?"

You take a deep breath, carefully choosing your words.

"Simon and I can't continue working together like this. It's affecting our Missions. I need a change, sir."

Price leans forward, his piercing gaze assessing the situation. "You two were one of the best teams I had. I need more than vague reasons, Y/n. You know that I can't just exchange my soldiers simply because of a request", he sighs.

"It's personal, sir. I can't disclose everything, but trust me, I need a different unit," you explain, aware that revealing the true depth of your personal struggles might complicate matters further.

Price studies your face for a moment before sighing.

"Alright, I'll process the paperwork. But you better sort this out, Sergeant. I won't have my team falling apart."

Months pass, and the separation becomes a painful reality. The memories of shared victories, haunting both you and Simon. The war outside may be unrelenting, but the emotional battles within are just as fierce.

One day, as you pass Simon in the hallway, there's a fleeting moment of eye contact. The unspoken words and unaddressed emotions hang heavy in the air. The wounds of a love lost on and off the battlefield are still fresh, and the path to healing seems like an uncertain journey.

In the following weeks, your final request grinds into action, and you find yourself reassigned to a different unit called "KorTac". Not exactly what you were hoping for, when you already know the tension and rivalry between the SpecGru and Kortac factions.

Moreover, the relief is accompanied by a nagging guilt for not being entirely honest with Price. Simon, on the other hand, watches your departure with a mix of confusion and quiet acceptance.

Entering the new faction, you are going to meet unfamiliar faces and a different set of dynamics. The work is challenging, but the void left by the fractured relationship with Simon remains, a constant reminder of what once was.

Back in the Task Force 141, Simon navigates the mission parameters with a stoic demeanor, but the absence of the seamless partnership is felt. The once vibrant laughter and shared glances now replaced by a stoic professional detachment"

Today was the day to say goodbye to your colleagues and friends that have known for over eight years. Eight years of laughter, agony and the painful farewell to beloved friends who aren't present anymore.

The barracks buzz with a mixture of emotions on the day of farewell. Hugs, handshakes, and heartfelt goodbyes fill the air as you prepare to bid adieu to friends who have been part of your life for eight years.

In a quiet corner, you find yourself engaging in a conversation with Captain Price and Gaz, the weight of impending farewells plasters on their faces.

Captain Price, his stern behaviour momentarily softened, speaks with a slight of nostalgia.

"Eight years, Sergeant. You've been a significant part of this team. You'll be missed."

Your eyes examine the room, stopping at a huge Silhouette that stands in the darkest corner of the room.

Gaz shift his glaze and sees your painful expression when he adds, "You've been a damn good comrade. We've been through a lot together. By the way, he actually will be missing you too. I just want to say it on his behalf because this dork won't have the balls to do it himself"

You nod appreciatively, the gratitude for their camaraderie weighing on your heart.

"It's been an honor, sir, and Gaz. I'll never forget the missions we've tackled and the bonds we've forged."

You thank them wholeheartedly with a light smile.

As the conversation continues, Simon remains silent and visibly confused in the background. His usual confident and cocky demeanor replaced by an uncharacteristic uncertainty.

Captain Price notices Simon's subdued state and approaches him. "Simon, you alright?"

Simon, his gaze darting between faces and conversations, mumbles, "Yeah, just... trying to process everything."

Gaz, taking a step closer, tries to offer reassurance. "It's a tough day, mate. Saying goodbye to a lot of history here."

Simon's confusion deepens, his eyes seeking understanding. "History? What's happening?"

Captain Price, exchanging a knowing glance with Gaz, explains gently, "Y/n is changing to a different faction, Simon. It's a farewell."

Simon's eyes widen, the realization dawning on him. "Changing? Farewell? Why wasn't I informed?"

Gaz shrugs, "Guess it happened fast. These things aren't always planned."

Seeking solace and advice, you decide to return to the friend who welcomed you when you moved out of the apartment you once shared with Simon. The familiarity of her presence offers a comforting refuge as you navigate the emotional aftermath of the farewell and the complex feelings tied to your relationship with Simon.

As you share your struggles and the decision to move on from the Task Force 141, your friend listens attentively. After recounting the recent events and the growing distance between you and Simon, she suggests, "Maybe it's time to have a heart-to-heart with him. Clear the air, sort things out."

You consider her words, understanding the wisdom in addressing the underlying issues. However, a sense of uncertainty lingers, and you express your hesitation.

"I don't know if it's the right time or if he's willing to open up. It feels like he's a different person now."

Your friend, a supportive presence throughout, encourages you to consider the possibility of reconciliation.

"People change, especially under the weight of war. It might be worth giving him a chance to explain and, perhaps, find a way to rebuild what's been broken."

However, you shake your head, a sense of resolve settling in. "I can't, not right now. It's too much, and we both need time apart. Maybe in the future, but not now."

Your friend, though initially shocked, nods in understanding. "It's your decision, Y/n. Take the time you need, but don't let it linger for too long.“

That night, as you settle into the new routine at the Korean base, the weight of the unspoken breakup looms heavy. The separation becomes a reality, and the absence of Simon brings forth a flood of memories—eight years of shared victories, defeats, laughter, and tears.

As the night progresses, an overwhelming wave of anxiety engulfs you. The familiar rooms seem to close in as the echoes of countless memories with Simon play vividly in your mind. Each shared moment, each inside joke, and the warmth of his presence intensify the emotional turmoil.

You find yourself breathless, gasping for air as the anxiety attack takes hold. The vulnerability of the situation, the weight of the unspoken goodbye, and the uncertainty of the future converge, overwhelming your senses.

In the silence of the night, you grapple with the reality of the silent breakup, the emotions suppressed during the farewell event now demanding acknowledgment. Alone with your thoughts, you confront the pain of the unspoken farewell and the daunting prospect of a life without Simon.

As the night wears on, the panic gradually subsides, leaving you emotionally drained and physically exhausted. The room, once filled with memories, now feels emptier than ever. The journey to healing has just begun, and the road ahead seems fraught with challenges.

The weight of eight years spent alongside Simon becomes a poignant reminder of the intricate tapestry of emotions that once defined your relationship.

After a month of settling into the apartment of your friend and adjusting to the routine at the "KorTac" base, the day arrives when you're finally scheduled to meet your new teammates.

Nervousness and uncertainty grip you as you ponder the challenges that often accompany being the only woman in a military unit.

The atmosphere at the base is bustling, and the absence of your new teammates, currently on a mission, heightens the anticipation. You steel yourself, knowing that you've had to work extra hard in the past to prove your capabilities as a woman in a male-dominated environment.

As you navigate the hallways of the base, your mind races with thoughts of acceptance and validation. The whispers of unfamiliar voices and glances in your direction make you acutely aware of the scrutiny you might face.

Amidst the bustling activity, you receive a message to report to the general's office. The mention of a meeting with a colonel named "König" gives you pause. The name sends a shiver down your spine, a sense of foreboding that you try to shake off. You take a deep breath, reminding yourself that names are just names.

Approaching the door of Colonel König's office, you muster the courage to knock. The sound echoes through the hallway, and a stern voice grants you permission to enter. The door swings open, revealing a room adorned with military memorabilia and maps.

As you step inside, Colonel König, a giant figure of authority, sits behind a large desk. His gaze meets yours, and a flicker of something unreadable crosses his eyes. You cringe inwardly, unsure of what to expect in this new chapter of your military career. The tension in the room is palpable, leaving the fate of your future at the "KorTac" base hanging in the balance.