#'They can't be bothered to think through what they're saying. They either don't notice or don't care.'

[trans-leek-cookie]

Reading TV Tropes and I get to the part where they explain Fair-Play Whodunit and I get to see most likely the laziest and stupidest slur in existence.

[10underoot2]

I'm here in my agony to say that discussion between Haein and Hyunwoo after he moved his stuff into the nursery will kill me with how painful it is.

They're both in so much pain it's visible there but they're unable to talk to each other about it.

'How could you move your stuff without telling me?' She's so hurt. Her tone is accusatory. She's hurt that she just emptied her unborn child's nursery and her husband decides to move away from her as well.

'You never told me you were emptying this room either.' He's pained that they've lost a much awaited child and she didn't bother consulting him before removing everything. He didn't get his closure. He's angry and upset and so hurt but he doesn't know that he needs to get through a very strongly wrought shield around her heart to have her acknowledge his pain.

'What are you getting at? Are you blaming me for the miscarriage?'

I never imagined Haein would think Hyunwoo would want to blame her. I want to cry that in her grief she failed to have enough faith in him and his love. She's hurt by his decision to move out so she takes it out on him. She's a classical study of saying something to completely annihilate the other when you're the one who's hurt.

Also, (this pained me more than anything) notice the extreme softness and absence of anger in his voice as he responds to her.

'What are you saying? I never thought that way.'

His anger and pain seeps back in when he confesses to her, 'I'm just as sad as you -'

'Don't lie. I know you want to say that it's my fault!' I wanted to yell at her to stop. I'm so sad that she let her past trauma catch up. Is that all she's thought about since she got the news of the miscarriage? That Hyunwoo would blame her? Her fears, her pain, her assumptions they all won. And they played a part in driving them apart.

'Forget it. I can't talk any sense into you.'

I think this is the most realistic line I've heard in a Kdrama. Because people do tend to in their anger and pain just give up. Hyunwoo couldn't deal with her accusing him of something he never did, he couldn't deal with her inability to listen and acknowledge his pain as well. So he walked away - it was just simpler, easier to do.

It's also reminding me of how he told her that if they lived in a closed space they would have been forced to confront each other. They were bound to hear the other cry and console the other then. When I think about the absolutely painful, lonely, cold two years that followed this, it makes me so sad.

I didn't know a minute long scene could send me in a spiral of sadness. As sad as a miscarriage is I've had immense clarity that it never implied that they could never have children. Not to dismiss their pain it's all very valid, but if they worked towards getting closure sooner they could have been so much stronger and probably could have had a child sooner. It makes me sad how the pain rendered them incapable to mend and work towards their relationship.

[avatar-anna]

Aaaah i am so deep in my Harry feels and you write him so perfectly…

So i have a request !

Something i cannot get out of my mind are the lines from as it was “Answer the phone, "Harry, you're no good alone why are you sittin' at home on the floor?What kind of pills are you on?" … and maybe the reader just got home and she’s the one saying that to Harry? Idk …

Anyway i love how you write ❤️ stay golden !

Grief Fic, Part One

so, this turned into a really long fic that's full of angst (perhaps too much). part of me wanted to make it even longer, but i think i ended it at the right point where i could come back to it if people wanted me to.

Part Two

tw: mentions of death, depression, grieving

"Harry? You here?" you called, walking across the threshold of your friend's house. Looking down, you ruffled the hair of the little girl who came in with you. Her hands gripped the straps of her backpack as she skipped into the house, clearly not bothered by the band-aid on her knee or the cut beneath it.

She looked around and called out for her dad, who either didn't hear it or couldn't find it on him to respond. When the skip in her step faltered and a look of confusion and hurt began to creep onto her face, you helped her out of her backpack and said, "Why don't you go upstairs, kiddo? Change out of your uniform? We can decide what to do for dinner after. Your pick."

You hoped that the distraction of getting to pick what they ate for dinner tonight would be enough, but she still seemed rather subdued compared to how cheery she sounded as she talked about her day at school on the drive home. "Okay."

She scurried off to her room upstairs, leaving you alone in the big kitchen that hardly got used anymore. When the young girl was gone, you called out to Harry again, stepping further into the house. You eventually found him in his studio, but he wasn't working.

"Jesus, H. I can't leave you alone for five minutes," you muttered, picking the bottle of whiskey off the floor and screwing the cap back on before setting it on a high shelf where he wouldn't think to reach for it.

Harry himself was sitting on the carpeted floor of his studio, staring blankly at nothing in particular. This wouldn't be the first time you found him in a similar state, but each time you hoped it would be the last.

"Is Harper alright?" he asked.

"Yeah, she's upstairs," you said.

"Thank you for picking her up again today," he said, still not looking at you.

You sat down next to him, draping your arms over your knees as you crossed your legs together. "No problem. I knew you were supposed to be working today, which leads me to my next question. Why are you sitting in here alone? I thought today was a writing session?"

"Cancelled. Didn't feel up to it today."

Harry didn't feel up to much of anything these days. It was understandable, to an extent. You knew he was going through a lot, but it wasn't just him he had to look out for. Harper needed her dad, now more than ever.

"Was it...anything in particular?" you asked gently. Sometimes Harry got cagey when you asked him about his current situation. He would snap or get defensive or ignore you completely. You'd known him for so many years, but in the span of a few months, you had to relearn how to talk to him. "Yesterday you seemed excited to work."

Harry shrugged, which drew your attention to his narrow shoulders. He hasn't been eating, you thought. You quickly scanned his face, and looking past the obvious unkempt facial hair and dark circles, you noticed his features were more pronounced, eyes sunken in some. You thought he was doing better, you thought he was healing.

"Harry," you said when he didn't respond.

Ever so gently, you rested a hand on his arm. His skin was cold as ice, and pale. So unlike the warmth and sunny glow it used to carry. The person in front of you was a shell of the man he once was, and you didn't know how to bring him back.

"Do you know what kind of pills you're on? If they're not working, the doctor can prescribe something else," you said.

"It's not the pills," he murmured. "I just...I just don't know how to function without her."

So you're not taking them, you thought but didn't say. Instead, you gave Harry's hand a gentle squeeze. "I know."

"I don't want to function without her. I—I can't do anything else but exist, and even that's exhausting."

Harry's voice was heavy with emotion, his eyes downcast as he stared at the band around his finger.

You were aware of the dangerous waters he was wading into, and the pressure to keep him from drowning suddenly crushed your chest. You'd already said all the typical platitudes—it'll get better with time, she wouldn't want you to live like this, Harper needs you. Sometimes they were enough to get him out of the house or to sit down on the couch with Harper to watch a movie, but it would only last so long, and recently Harry's mood improvement would dwindle faster and faster. You did what you could to help by taking care of Harper and checking in on Harry everyday, but he was starting to scare you.

"Daddy?"

Your head whipped around to where Harper was standing by the door of the studio. At eight years old, she looked just like Harry with bright green eyes and dimpled cheeks and curly hair. But she looked like her mother too, and though it was nearly imperceptible, you saw the bob of Harry's Adam's apple when he looked at her.

"Hi sweetheart," he said, not standing up to go over to her.

Harper waited by the door, waiting for Harry to do more. To ask about her day or tell her about his or go over to her or something. But he didn't, like he was too exhausted to move.

"Can we—Can we go to the park? The sun is still out and I finished all my homework."

"Y/n can take you," Harry said.

"Or we can watch a movie? Or—"

"Harper, I think Dad is tired. Why don't we—"

"He's always tired!" Harper said suddenly. "He never wants to spend time with me or talk to me! Why are you acting like this!" She went over to Harry and began to shake his shoulders, her cheeks red and eyes imploring. "Wake up! Wake up!"

Harry didn't do anything at first, letting his daughter shake him and pound her fists against his chest. Your eyes welled with tears and your throat tightened as you watched, caught between pulling Harper off and letting her get her emotions out, half hoping it would stir something in her father. It didn't.

"I hate you! I want mom!" she finally said when Harry was still practically catatonic.

He said nothing, but you could see the tears in his eyes as she stormed off, flinching when he heard the door to her room slam two floors up. His shoulders shook of their own volition then, accompanied by tears and sobbing.

"She didn't mean it," you said, pulling him into your chest. Harry's grip was tight despite his lack of nourishment as he continued to cry, warm tears bleeding through your shirt. "She's dealing with this too."

"I don't know how to be what she needs," he sobbed. "I don't think I can."

Your heart broke for the two people you loved most in this world. You'd tried so hard to help Harry and Harper, to take care of her while he got back on his feet. But he hadn't, and now you felt like you were standing at a crossroads.

"I think it might be time to—" you stopped, getting choked up yourself, "to maybe go somewhere."

That got his attention enough to stop crying for a moment. "Go somewhere?"

"I've...looked into a couple places," you said gingerly. "Facilities. Where you can rest and get better and meet with grief counselors and groups. Get the help that you need, you know?"

When Harry's wife died, you obviously didn't expect him to bounce back right away, but you also didn't anticipate the state he was in now. Everyone grieved differently, you knew that, but his grief was all-consuming, slowly eating away at him and leaving him hollow. You did what you could to support him and Harper, but you had your own life, your own job, which was starting to become less and less understanding every time you left early to pick Harper up from school. You did it all happily and willingly because you loved both of them, but none of you could keep going like this.

"I'm not sick," he said. "I'm not an addict. I don't need to go to rehab."

"I love you, H, and I'm worried about you," you said. You put your hands on either side of his face so he had to look you directly in the eye. "Harper loves you, and she wants you to be her dad. You have so many people that love and care for you, Harry, and we all want you to be okay again."

"My wife died, Y/n. I'm never going to be okay again," he said, pulling away from you harshly, voice sharp. "How can you say that? You really think it's so easy? The mother of my child is gone, and she can never come back, and you what? You want me to just forget about her? Forget what we had? I bet you'd love that wouldn't you. That's probably why you've been so eager to 'help' Harper and me. Don't think for one second that you could ever replace her. So just go!"

It didn't matter that you knew this outburst was one of rage filled grief, but that didn't mean it hurt any less. You felt like you'd been slapped, like Harry had reached his hand into your chest and crushed your heart. That was never your intention. Harry was a friend, a dear one, but a friend just the same. And Harper was your goddaughter. You couldn't just sit by and let the two people you considered family fall apart.

But maybe you weren't who he needed.

"I know you think you'll never be okay again, but you will," you said quietly. "Because you love Harper, you will be. One day you'll stop resenting her for not being Sophia, and one day you'll stop resenting Sophia for leaving you. It'll always hurt, I know that, but one day it'll hurt a little less."

You stood up from the floor and smoothed your trousers, sniffling a little. Harry had gone back to staring blankly, but the tight clench of his jaw told you he was listening. "Bye, H."

You didn't leave right away. You made a phone call to his mom first, asking her to stay with Harry and Harper, not explaining why you couldn't be the one to check up on them anymore. Anne had asked you to keep an eye on the pair after she went back home after staying at Harry's place for a month. You'd already planned on doing so, but you agreed. Now the tough love needed to come from someone else. When Anne told you she was on her way, you went upstairs to Harper's room to check on her.

She was crying on her bed, her body curled into a ball around a stuffed animal. Sighing, you walked over to her and sat on the corner of her bed and soothed her back with your hand. "I know you didn't mean that, Harper Rose."

"Why is he acting like that?" she cried, not looking up at you. "Why won't he play with me anymore? Or take me to school?"

"He..." You didn't even know what to say to make this better. "Your dad is...sick."

"Like my mom was?" Harper asked. She sat up, her little face red from crying.

"Not—Not quite," you said, trying not to get choked up. Sophia had been a dear friend to you too. "His heart hurts so much that he can't, or doesn't know how to...function properly. Does that make sense?"

Harper nodded as she wiped a tear from her eye. "He's heartbroken."

"I think so."

She didn't say anything for a minute, as if she was processing that information about Harry. Then, "Does that mean I love my mom less if I'm not heartbroken like that?"

Her words made you pinch your arm to hold back your tears. It wasn't fair to Harper that she had to deal with all of this at a young age; she didn't deserve to have these thoughts or ask these questions, and selfishly, a part of you deep down felt you didn't deserve to answer them.

"No, of course not, kiddo. Your dad just—you and your dad loved her differently. And I think part of him is sad that you lost your mom and not just that he lost his wife."

"I don't understand," she said, her voice trembling. "When will he be normal again?"

"Do you think you'll feel normal again?" you asked her gently. Harper shrugged, more tears silently leaking out of the corners of her eyes. "People's hearts and minds react differently when someone dies. And right now, your dad's mind is telling him not to get out of bed or take care of himself or take care of you. It doesn't make sense to you or me, but it makes sense to him."

"Oh." Harper looked contemplative again, her eyes trained on the yellow patterned bedspread beneath her. Everything in her room was some shade of yellow—walls, curtains, lampshades, the sun behind the bedframe that Sophia painted—everything was made to feel warm and inviting. "What do we do now? How do we help him?"

"Well, what do you do when you're sick?"

"Go to a doctor."

"That's right," you said. "He's gonna go to the doctor, and the doctor will tell us what we should do. And in the meantime, you just keep loving your dad, okay? You're allowed to be angry and frustrated and sad, but never stop loving him. It might not look like it, but knowing you love him helps."

"Okay," Harper said.

"I called your grandma. She's gonna come stay with you for a little while while your dad gets better. She'll take you to school and pick you up and make you all sorts of treats with you."

"Why can't you take me to school?" she asked.

"I have to work," you explained. "But, if you need anything, you know my number. Just call me and I'll be there, okay? But you and Grandma will have fun, you always do."

You stayed in Harper's room until she fell asleep, smoothing her hair with your hand once more before standing up from the bed. You planned to stay until Anne arrived, but you figured you could tidy up and get the guest bedroom ready in the meantime. By the time she walked through the door, the guest room had been made up and the kitchen was squeaky clean. Harry never came out of his studio, or he went up to his room without you noticing but you were fine with that. You wouldn't have known what to say to him anyway.

You gave Anne the names of doctors and grief groups for Harry, and the name of a good child psychiatrist for Harper. You'd been meaning to set up a meeting for her, but you hadn't had the time, and it also wasn't really your place and you didn't want to overstep. Anne gave you a long hug before you left, thanking you for taking care of her family. Having someone hug you for once instead of the other way around was overwhelming, and you almost started crying right there in her arms.

But you held yourself together for a few more minutes as you pulled away. You promised to check in and help wherever and whenever you could, then you left, slightly relieved that Harry and Harper's well-being wasn't solely on your shoulders anymore and partly sad that you weren't able to help them more.

The first few weeks, you didn't come around the house as much, giving Harry his space. You met Harper at the park when your work schedule allowed it and had her over to your place for sleepovers when she asked.

Anne kept you in the loop, even when there wasn't much to report—Harper met regularly with a counselor and Harry didn't, Harper didn't wake up crying in the middle of the night as much and Harry still wasn't going back to work. Part of you felt like Harry needed more tough love than coddling at this point. You knew he wouldn't actually go to therapy unless you dragged him by the ear or eat something if you didn't sit with him until he was done. But it wasn't your place to dictate how he was helped, so you kept your mouth shut whenever Anne said he wasn't getting any better.

However, that all changed when Harry collapsed. He was so weak from not eating, he physically couldn't hold himself up. Or so Anne claimed. You didn't want to, but part of you thought there might have been some intention behind Harry's actions, or lack thereof. That was when you knew things had to change. If this were a movie, then that moment was the point of no return, and you weren't going to let Harry destroy himself anymore.

"If you get him in a car, I'll take care of the rest," you said to Anne the day after. She'd been apprehensive, but you insisted that this was the right choice. "He can't just sit alone on the floor of his studio all day. Either we do this now or his grief wins."

So it was settled. You didn't know how she did it, but Anne somehow got Harry up and in the passenger seat of your car. He clearly was not pleased by the whole thing, but with his lack of eating, he was no match for you or his mother.

"Where are we going?" he asked, arms folded angrily.

"My place."

"Why?"

"Because I'm not going to let Harper witness your path of self-destruction. You wanna die? You don't want to take care of yourself? Then you can do it at my place instead of in front of your daughter."

It was harsh, but Harry hadn't been particularly amicable these last few days. According to Anne, instead of catatonic, he was rude, his words sharp as a knife and just as cutting. His mother didn't deserve to deal with that, and neither did Harper, but you could handle him. Whether he liked it or not.

"Fuck you," he muttered.

"Fuck you," you replied simply.

Harry didn't say anything else the rest of the ride to your house, which was completely fine by you. You had a plan in place for Harry's stay, but you went over it again and again in your head, hoping it would work. You had Harry's meds, which he had not been taking, you picked out a grief group for him to attend, or one-on-one counseling if he didn't want to go to group therapy, you worked out a schedule that made sure Harry was constantly doing something rather than withering away on your couch. But first...

"You need a shower. I'm not living with you while you smell like that. And brush your teeth too."

"I thought you didn't care what I did," he said, begrudgingly following you into your house. It was much smaller than his, but that was for the better. It would be easier to keep an eye on him in close quarters.

"Don't be ridiculous, Harry. We all care about what happens to you," you said, leading him down the hall to your small guest room and bathroom were.

You gestured toward the bathroom when he set his small duffle bag on the bed, but he stayed where he was. "No."

"No?"

"You and my mum can drag me around and make me sleep in a different bed, but you can't force me to take medication, you can't force me to go to therapy, you can't force me to live," Harry spat. You took it on the chin, eyeing the way it seemed exhausting for him to just raise his voice at you. "I'm not a child, and I'm not one of your patients, so leave me the fuck alone."

"Lord, give me strength," you muttered to yourself before storming over to him.

You grabbed Harry by the collar of his sweatshirt and pulled him into the bathroom, where you promptly began to pull his layers off one by one.

"What the fuck?" Harry said, too surprised to fend you off, and too weak as well. "Get off of me!"

"You are a stubborn asshole," you spat, letting all the anger and frustration from the last few weeks seep into your voice. Once Harry was down to his underwear and socks, you quickly turned the shower on and pushed him in, holding your forearm against his chest as water sprayed both of you. "And selfish. You are a parent, Harry, you can't afford to fall apart, especially not in front of Harper. You can't do this to her. I won't let you."

Harry struggled against you, but not as much. He looked furious for having brought up Harper, though. But you kept going, needing to say everything that had been rattling around in your brain since he snapped at you.

"Sophia is gone, H," you said, voice gentle but firm.

"Shut up—"

"And it hurts. I can't imagine how much it hurts to lose your wife, but I—I know how it feels to lose a parent." Your voice began to waver, but you willed yourself to calm down. You didn't talk about it much, but you could relate to the situation at hand better than most. It was part of the reason why you helped Harry and Harper out so much. "Harper is strong and brave and charismatic. She's all the good things Soph was. Stop punishing her for it and celebrate it. She needs you, H. If you can't find it in yourself to get better for you, do it for your daughter. Don't do this to her."

Harry was crying by then, and you were too. Water sprayed the both of you, but he wasn't straining against you anymore. When it felt like he was starting to slide against the tiles to sit down, you didn't let him. "Don't do that," you said, using all your strength to hold him up. "Don't let it consume you. Lean on me if you have to, but don't—don't sit down."

To your surprise, he didn't. Harry let you give him a scrub down, starting with his hair and then sponging his body with soap. You left his briefs on for his sake. As a nurse, you were used to seeing every part of the body, but Harry was your friend, not a patient. When you were done, you left him to dry off with a towel and dress with the instruction to be in the kitchen for dinner in twenty minutes. You didn't have to say what you would do if he didn't come. Harry got a dose of how forceful you could be very quickly.

So he came out of his room, and the two of you ate in complete silence. You didn't mind the quiet and were content to let Harry figure out whatever was going on in his head. You did keep an eye on him, though, making sure he didn't push his food around and actually ate it. He did, thankfully; you really didn't want to have to spoon-feed him too.

"Tomorrow I set up a group therapy session in town. It's super confidential, so you don't have to worry about that, but—"

"No."

"No? Really? We're doing this again?" you asked, only half joking.

"I don't want to go to group therapy," he said, and you could practically taste his displeasure for it across the table.

"Well, I thought you might say that, so I also scheduled one-on-one counseling, though I thought you might prefer the group. Less opportunities to talk when there are multiple people in one session." You picked up and quickly washed your plate before setting it down on the drying rack. "Tomorrow's session is at ten. Let me know what you want to do before then, but you're going to one of them. Oh, and you're responsible for cleaning up after yourself. Night."

You left Harry to his own devices after that, deciding to get ready for bed. It was going to be a long few weeks, or however long to get your friend back up on his feet, and you were going to need all the peace of mind you could get.

Three weeks later, Harry was still irritable. You knew he resented you for making him do, well, anything, but he still did them. He went to his group therapy sessions and cleaned up after himself in the kitchen. He just didn't like talking to you. Or acknowledging you. Or looking at you. You were pretty sure all the anger he had about Sophia dying and having to take care of Harper alone was now directed at you. You didn't necessarily mind being his outlet if it meant he was getting out of the house, but it did get exhausting at times. And it made for a very awkward car ride.

"I...can't pick you up from group today," you said as you neared the building where Harry's group sessions were.

"What the hell am I supposed to do then?" he huffed, crossing his arms across his chest like a child.

You gripped the steering wheel tighter so as not to whack him repeatedly on the arm. "Are you really that much of a pampered celebrity that you can't use public transportation? Or your own two feet?"

"Well why the fuck are you signing me up for this shit if you can't take me. I don't even want to go to these stupid meetings."

In a split second, you pulled over and put the car in park. "Get out."

"What?"

"You heard me," you said, the frustration you'd been pushing down the last three weeks finally bubbling to the surface. You'd been patient, you'd done what you thought was right for Harry and his family, but you couldn't be his punching bag anymore. "I've been taking you to these meetings because I want to help you, because I want to help Harper, but you have...kicked and screamed like a child every step of the way, and I—I want you to be better. I want you to be able to handle your emotions in a healthy way, but I—" I give up, you wanted to say, but even you weren't that mean in the midst of your anger. "You're an adult, Harry. I can't force you to go to therapy, so don't. Get out. Do whatever the hell you want."

Harry looked at you for a moment, surprised by your outburst. His mouth was pressed into a hard line, his eyes roving around your face. Searching for what, you weren't sure. Maybe he didn't think you would ever actually kick him out. You gave him as good as he got when he snapped at you, but you never expressly kicked him out. You were pretty sure he was deciding if you were serious or not.

"Out!" you said when he still hadn't opened the door. Now you were going to be late to work.

"Fuck! Fine," he said, then he was opening the door and getting out of the car. It shut with a definitive slam, but you didn't wait around to see Harry glare at you as you rushed back onto the street.

Work sucked, which made your mood that much worse. You normally liked your job at the hospital. It was busy and made you feel like a zombie at the end of most shifts, but the work was rewarding, and you were good at it too. You ran the Labor and Delivery room like a tight ship, everything and everyone had a place. But tonight you were slammed, one issue after another for you to solve. Normally you could handle the stress, but your nerves had been frayed for weeks, and every minor inconvenience didn't feel so minor right now.

Nothing was going your way, patients' families were being bigger assholes than usual, and the charting system was being glitchy. Not to mention you were pulling a double shift, so it was safe to say you were tired out of your mind, irritated, and not as chipper as you normally were amongst the normal amount of stress.

"Y/n, have you taken your lunch yet?"

You looked up from the computer at the nurses' station where one of your coworkers was standing on the other side. "Look at this place, Miranda. When would I have the time?"

The Labor and Delivery wing of the hospital was full of patients, excited family members in the waiting room, OB interns, and nurses trying to maintain order. You could always expect a good number of people in this wing of the hospital, but today was more crowded than usual. In-laws that wanted to be in the delivery room were driving you crazy in a way that they normally didn't, and a surgical intern tried to talk down to you, which tried your practically non-existent patience. It was safe to say that your pink scrubs were very misleading about your disposition today.

Miranda narrowed her eyes at you. "It's thirty minutes."

"I can't. I have to get these charts updated because these idiots we call interns don't know how to—"

"Y/n?"

"God, tell me this is not happening," you muttered before looking up from the computer again. Harry was standing at the nurses' station next to Miranda, who was staring at him with wide eyes. "I can't do this with you right now."

"I know. I just wanted to—"

"I can take your bitching at home, but not here," you said, going back to your computer. Everything you'd felt this morning was still simmering in you, and you didn't want to make a scene at work.

"I just came to apologize," he said, his voice lacking the harsh edge it'd had since he'd been staying with you.

You shook your head and picked up a chart as you began to walk away. "Honestly? I don't have time for that, either, H."

Perhaps you shouldn't have been so flippant, but you were at work, for one. You got into a certain headspace to keep everything and everyone in order, and you couldn't compromise that on a hectic day like this, even if Harry had come to say he was sorry.

"But, Y/n, you still have to take your lunch!" Miranda said.

Stopping in your tracks, you turned back around. Your arms were crossed as you gave Miranda a look, but she just stared right back. She was always the one who looked after you while you looked after everyone else. Sighing, you walked back over to the nurses' station to hand over the chart on your hands. "Ten minutes."

"The law says thirty."

"Fifteen," you amended, then left before Miranda could argue with you. You heard footsteps behind you, and while you knew they were Harry's, you didn't do anything to stop him from following.

The break room was small, just big enough to hold a refrigerator, some cupboards, and a table with a few chairs. You didn't spend much time here, but it did see a lot of foot traffic despite its size.

Sitting down at the table, you rested your head in your hands, your eyes closing for a few seconds now that you let yourself have this short break. Your feet hurt and your head pounded, but you managed to stand up anyway and make yourself a cup of coffee.

"What are you doing here?" you asked, though you weren't really sure you cared. Not right now anyway.

"I wanted to apologize," he said right away, like he was afraid you weren't going to let him speak.

You laughed a little. "Oh? What for?"

You knew you were being difficult, but you couldn't help it. The way Harry treated you had all come to a head this morning, and the shit day at work didn't help your mood, either. Staring at him over the rim of your coffee mug, your heart softened the tiniest bit. He looked like a scolded puppy with his head tilted down and his hands behind his back. It was hard for you to balance the anger you felt for the way he treated you and acknowledge the fact that it was his grief that was making him act this way. There's no wrong way to grieve. It was something you knew and understood, but Harry's grief process didn't make your life any easier.

"I've been...horrible to you," he said, though he still wouldn't look at you. "I—I know you've been trying to help Harper and me, and all I've done was take everything I've felt out on you."

It was hard to find the right words to say. You didn't want to just excuse his behavior by saying he was grieving, but you knew he would never treat you the way he had been otherwise. But that didn't make it hurt any less.

"What made you come to this conclusion?" you decided to ask, curious to know the answer.

Harry smiled sheepishly and chuckled to himself in a way that was embarrassed more than amused. "Therapy. I went after you kicked me out this morning. Thanks for that, by the way."

You couldn't help but grin a little, at the very least because you hadn't seen Harry smile in months. "You're welcome."

"I'm really, really sorry, Y/n," he said once the air in the room sobered again. "I don't know if I could ever say it enough, or express how thankful I am to you for being there for Harper when I couldn't. I'm sorry for all the horrible things I've said and the way I've acted. I, um, I don't magically feel better, but for the first time since Soph died, I want to be."

You believed him when he said that. There was an air about Harry that seemed different than the last few months. And the fact that he was apologizing at all and seemed to have a small grasp of his feelings said a lot. And you wanted to believe him too, for the sake of his own health and happiness as well as Harper's.

"I know it was your grief that made you...act a certain way, but thank you for apologizing," you said.

"Things won't immediately go back to the way they were, I know that, but," Harry said, wiping the corner of his eye. "I wanted to take Harper out to dinner tomorrow night, and I'm hoping you'll join us."

"Not tonight?"

"No. I think I just want to go home and be with my daughter tonight," he said, sounding a little nervous and a little hopeful. "And I'm sure you're sick of me, so I thought I'd let you have a night to yourself."

You took a moment to look at your friend, really look at him. Harry's frame was still narrow, he was paler than usual, and the angles were still a little too sharp and pronounced, but his hair was neat and his eyes were clear, and he just looked different overall.

Standing up, you walked to where Harry was still standing by the entrance to the break room and threw your arms around him. A wave of emotion hit you the second his arms wrapped around you, and you couldn't help the sob that escaped your lips as you held him tight. He felt so frail, like he could blow away with the next breeze. It pained you to feel how everything affected him physically.

"You scared me," you said. Perhaps it was too soon to admit, but you needed to say what had been weighing on your heart since he collapsed. "You pissed me of and drove me insane, but above everything, I was terrified."

Terrified of losing him, terrified of not doing what was right by him or Harper, terrified that he'd never be the same. The fear of losing Harry to his grief kept you up most nights. More than the poisonous words or cold shoulders or childish behavior, you'd been so scared of every worst case scenario it nearly made you sick.

"I'm sorry I've put you through so much. You lost her too."

That made you squeeze Harry even harder. You'd known Sophia first and had been the one to introduce her to Harry. The three of you had been friends for a long time before Harry and Soph had even started dating, and you stayed friends long after. She wasn't your sister, but in a lot of ways she was family, and so were Harry and Harper.

Eventually you pulled away, wiping your eyes and stepping back from his embrace. You felt a little awkward, but lighter too, and hopeful for the future.

"So you'll come? To dinner?" Harry asked, his own eyes lined with tears.

Harry wasn't magically healed. He still had a long road ahead of him to be healthy again, not to mention mending his relationship with Harper. But you decided to believe that he was on the mend, that he was open to getting proper help and taking the right steps to manage his depression.

"It would be my pleasure."

[decolonize-the-left]

Is anyone else just completely disillusioned? Done?

I could not think any less of people still talking about celebrities or how their biggest issues are not having a Starbucks cup that's $50

Like why are we as a collective letting people like that run the lives of everyone on the planet? A planet rife with unnecessary conflict and greed? People who can't be bothered to just Not go to chick-fil-a?

Why are people who clearly value profit over humanity in charge of humanity, ykwim? How the fuck did that become a majority opinion?

I drive thru my nuclear town, I go to our community events, our local small businesses, I try to support my community in ways I can everyday. But I can't help but notice that So Many of the people who do that alongside me, don't show up to protest for the rights of the people they claim to support.

Its all so incredibly shallow and one dimensional and obviously disingenuous and why the fuck are the rest of STILL begging for the ability to make changes within the framework they built?

Why are we still making educational posts for them and trying to make them understand when the first thing we are taught about reaching understand is that you must first be willing to listen and they refuse.

The ruling classes never listened. Never, ever have they granted anyone any oppressed group rights that they asked for without the group needing to fight for it. And it's always after generations of oppression.

I'm fucking tired of being nice and pretending the laws they made up matter and like their socially constructed bureaucracy is the only way to make change to be quite fucking honest.

They're LUCKY we use it EVER and now they don't even fucking listen to our voicemails?

The only things stopping me from taking what's mine are disabilities and I'm Dying to know what everyone else's excuses are.

Or is that?

Are we all physically too incapable? Is every single able bodied person actually a liberal fascist?

Asking for the disabled Turtle Mountain Ojibwe person typing this who's life literally depends on y'all caring enough about other people to make life anything but a list of systematic circumstances I'll suffer from until I eventually die early of an illness I can't afford medical aids for and which are not provided for me either.

And if you're able bodied and you feel the same... Start working outside that framework and stop asking so nicely. Stop giving a shit if you don't have the support of the oppressors and their liberal foot soldiers.

Stop worrying about what CNN is gonna say about you because I promise that the people who matter and Understand you will be inspired to follow in your foot steps and supportive.

Get active in your co-ops, mutual aid groups, and consider training like you're black bloc.

Learn what direct action is and how to do it and start doing it. Just reading theory era is over.

More of this

less whatever the level of cognitive dissonance this is

Imagine saying 'i voted so I did everything I could' like the suffragettes didn't have an arson and bombing campaign because the people who Could vote were people benefitted from their systemic silence and thus did almost Nothing to help them get voting rights and they Refused to let oppressor laziness be their obstacle.

Yeah, they don't teach you that in Voting Matters School the suffragettes were bombing the UK just a year or two before they got their rights do they?

The only language oppressors will listen to is their own.

And I'm Tired of pretending otherwise because that delusion is what makes the privileged feel like they don't have to do anything but vote and makes them feel they're justified to criticize those of us that fight back through other avenues.

And maybe if we had politicians that gave a shit about any of us then those votes and movements and public sentiment would have a bigger sway in government, but they don't.

They don't fucking care.

Why are we still giving them power over any of us and letting them tell us what to do and demonize us when they use that power allowed to kill us and bury us in unmarked graves in some field in Mississippi? And make everything so expensive that the richest citizens on earth struggle to pay their bills?

Why can a government only "condemn" a state agent's right to shoot an unarmed protester 57 times, but they can bypass Congress to send Israel billions upon billions worth of weapons?

I'm tired of pretending this country is anything but a front for White Supremacists when every liberal I see is trying to gaslight everyone into thinking genocide is acceptable.

Shut the fuck up and get out of my equality tags, fascist.

[triflesandparsnips]

Lot of takes going around the internets about certain "deaths" in the ofmd season finale, so, uh-- guess it's time for me to try and lose some followers on tumblr dot com with

Some Thoughts on Why I Am Not Particularly Bothered or Concerned about Izzy's Apparent "Death"

Laying the groundwork first...

1. Narratively speaking, Izzy's been a dead man walking since the start of the season. Babe shot himself and got a rebirth-- but he still definitely intended to die. Every minute he was still around was borrowed time.

Did he have to die? Maybe not. I know I could've written a version of the show where he didn't. But then that would be my show-- not theirs. I can't know exactly what themes, bugbears, bête noires, catharsis, or artistic Vibes are driving that writers' room, and until the credits run on the finale of the third season, none of the rest of us can either.

2. Izzy spent the season being in a liminal state-- and there's nothing in the story saying that he can't continue doing that. Izzy spent the season having one foot in one space, one hoof in the other, and himself halfway through the door, a chimera of mirrored things right up to his "death": pirate and ship, hard and soft, old ways and new, etc etc. But "the gravy basket" is a weird little liminal space between life and death, a place that both Ed and Buttons have found (and returned from) before. We don't know where Izzy "is" right now-- he could be there.

(tbh, I wonder how much poor feeling we'd be having about all this if we'd gotten a final tag of a blue-washed Izzy staring down at a bowl of soup while helplessly saying "but this isn't gravy, what the fu--")

3. I think there is an unfortunate belief that "it's not real unless you see the body" is a universal -- or perhaps inarguable -- "fact" of storytelling. But it's not. It's just a bit of narrative shorthand that got popular, and now we're too ready to fall into the trap of believing the inverse is true too-- that if there is a body, then there must therefore have been a "real" death.

This season has spent quite a lot of narrative time and effort telling us that its story is using a different model, with different shorthands; specifically, that magic is real, that there is at least some kind of existence after death, and that the dead can be resurrected.

And that brings me to the meat of why I'm not particularly bothered or concerned about what, at this stage of the story, could still very well be just a minor setback--

4. This whole show, and particularly this season, is a fairy tale. It's a story that works with fairy tale logic and tropes, and it's in conversation with other fairy tales too, ones that the OFMD audience is likely to know well enough to spot their narrative beats in action. So "Pinocchio" gets mentioned a lot? Cool-- the audience applies what is commonly known of that story to this one ("a real boy", the mirror-opposite being a puppet with no nose, etc), and finds some Cool Shit. Then they're primed to keep looking for fairy tales, even unnamed ones, in case there's another little nugget of reward-dopamine for finding a connection.

So the fact that we saw a mermaid? Suddenly, I personally am noticing "Little Mermaid" motifs all over the place. That Ed was in a "sleep like death" -- after fucking around with a spinning wheel -- until his prince came to wake him? Well fuck, man, that's Blackbeard playing "Sleeping Beauty" for us all.

And bringing it all back to a "dead" Izzy Hands... when I add up a "dead" body surrounded by a bunch of laborers mourning the person who nominally kept their living space nice AND who was wanted dead by an authority figure for the crime of being the "better" version of what that figure wanted to be...

...well fuck, idk about the rest of you, but to me that all adds up to Izzy's story being Snow fucking White. Waiting for someone to come pull the bullet poisoned apple from his body so he can live again.

5. This is a second season. Of three. And Izzy Hands is the writer's favorite chewtoy, so there is lots of time, space, and incentive to bring him back. If there's a third season, we have a pile of ways he could be brought back over the course of hours of literal viewing time and possibly months of in-narrative time. That's ages.

And the solutions don't have to be difficult! For instance, we still have canonical hallucinations from Stede-- that's one route. Or fuck it, we could have Izzy's (very solid-looking) ghost be the embodiment of their being haunted by the Sea, that would work too.

And even barring all that-- his grave is right there with our heroes. The ship is out there hunting down his murderer. Even if you're happy he's dead... bad news, friend. He's all over the third season landscape. (uh oh, it's GNU Izzy Hands)

But those are just a few options that leave his body rotting but his character still alive. I happen to think we could all dream a little bigger, darlings. For instance:

A. You cannot tell me that these writers, on this show, with these actors, would not absolutely go all in on a zombie-esque hand thrusting out of the dirt mere hours after burial. Look me in the eyes and tell me Con O'Neill wouldn't pull off an entire digging-out scene only to end with himself panting beside the hole, looking around, hearing Ed and Stede being weird in their haunted hut, and wearily say, "Are you fucking kidding me."

B. Don't like zombies? Want to stay closer to the Snow White vibe AND introduce a love interest for him? One hyphenated word: body-snatcher. Gotta dig those bodies up fresh for the Definitely Historically Accurate anatomists of the time! But oh, says this New Guy, this corpse is-- wow, it's weird that they buried him with a rose and really amazing makeup and a truly extraordinary number of whittled whales, plus what's with that horsey leg grave marker, this guy must've been fucking fascinating, man, I wish I could've met him-- --at which point Izzy's hand shoots out and chokes the guy half to death and the lads come tumbling out of the house and ta da, mission accomplished, Izzy resurrected in 5 minutes or less with his horsey leg conveniently beside him and an entire season for himself and everyone else to Deal With It, amazing, fantastic, no notes from me.

C. Come to think of it, there is genuinely a non-zero chance that the crew just. Fucked up the burial. I mean... even though I was just arguing why we shouldn't see it as Law, we didn't actually see the body. We saw a grave. What did they bury him in? Was it a box? Was it some canvas? Did they definitely pick up the right one when it was time to bury him? Or did they maybe carefully make him an ahistorical safety coffin just in case a cat demon came to bother him and his corpse wanted to make a fuss about it, y'know, very common, could happen to anyone, and Frenchie just so happens to have Blackbeard's old collar bell right here--

6. Here's the bottom line, imo: The only thing that would keep Izzy really actually dead and completely removed from the story is a lack of narrative time and space-- and we have plenty of both. Stories are like Lego. If you've got enough time and you're willing to play with pieces from a whole lotta different sets, it's not hard to put the same elements together in different ways to get new, exciting configurations. It's why I'm actually rubbish at predicting exact details of stuff-- there are a lot of ways something could go, there are infinite doors out of problems the narrative seems to throw at us, and no two people will come up with the same thing because we're all different.

That, to me, is one of the big ways I personally enjoy and engage with stories. And it's why I genuinely can't be fussed about Izzy's death, not when we're only two-thirds through the story as a whole; observing someone setup and then try and execute a complicated narrative trick is my jam.

But my way of engaging with all this is by no means the best or only way. How we all interact with art, and what speaks to us, is extremely personal. If how this season and Izzy's death went just didn't work for you, that's okay. I'm sorry it wasn't the story you wanted it to be. That blows.

I just know I can't say yet that it didn't work for me. I won't know until I can take in the entire picture, just as I can't judge a finished Lego set by the one piece I step on midway through construction. I can see different ways Izzy's death/rebirth could absolutely work, but will the writer manage it? I dunno.

But I'm willing to wait and see if the stupid puppet can pull it off.

[venturelovebot]

A/N: This took me longer than I wanted it to but it's finally done! That means there's only one fic left to finish before I open up requests again. :•) Enjoy!

Premise: Depressed!GN!Reader finds out they're not as worthless as they think they are.

Warnings: None! Pure fluff.

You scribbled on the corner of the page to test your ink pen.

I have to vacuum the floor again soon. Dishes need to be done again today. I don't know what I want to make for dinner. More chores need to be done tomorrow. Is it even worth it anymore?

You pause. Every entry from the start of this week looked exactly the same. Flipping through the pages you notice that the beginning entries aren't much different either. Seems like every day has turned monotonous and bleak for you for a long time now. When you really think about it, when was the last time you were truly happy to wake up in the morning? Nothing came to mind.

The amount of hopelessness that filled your mind, body and soul was immense.

"Good morning!" Sloan sets down a coffee mug with a cat meme on it for you. Their smile had genuine happiness behind it– not something you could relate to.

"Good morning." You mimic their smile and watch as they take a seat next to you.

You're not sure how they could be so happy to wake up to the same burden every day of their life. Surely they must of thought you were baggage at this point. You were just waiting for the day they got tired of your presence and finally packed up and left. Everyone did. It was only a matter of time for them, too.

You bookmark the current page of your journal and close its cover.

"Don't forget your medicine!" They set your pill case next to your cat meme mug.

"Thanks."

They give you a kiss on the cheek.

You want to cry. Instead, you just watch as they take a seat next to you at the dining table for breakfast.

"Not hungry?" They ask.

They fork small bites of waffle into their mouth.

"I already ate." You lied.

"Oh? What did you have? I didn't hear you making anything."

You knew they were worried about you, but your brain didn't accept this.

"Just toast."

They're quiet for a moment. "Just toast?" They repeat.

"With jam. I'm not completely tasteless." You halfheartedly joke.

In order to dodge more conversation you open your pill case and down everything on an empty stomach.

"You have therapy today, right?" It feels they're playing a game of Twenty Questions.

"Yeah. I can make it there on my own, though."

"Well, I don't have anything to do right now. Why not let me take you?"

Right. You forgot. You were used to them being gone for weeks on end because of field work, studying or traveling. They took a couple weeks off to spend time with you. It seemed to be happening increasingly often as of late.

"It's alright, really. I don't want to bother you with it." You insist.

"It's not a bother! I promise!"

They're smiling again. It's hard to say no to that face.

"Alright."

...

Your therapist gives you back your journal after reading the last few entries. Nearly fifty minutes had already gone by and you don't feel like you've gotten everything off your chest yet.

"So, you feel like nothings gotten any better then?" They inquire.

"How are things supposed to get better at this rate?"

You collapse into the sofa and stare at the wall behind your doctor.

"I'm a burden. I can't do anything right. Everyone else already has everything figured out. What am I supposed to do? I'll never be good enough at anything."

Your therapist jots down everything you're saying before looking back up at you.

"If it's okay to ask... what do you want to be good at, exactly?"

You think about it. "Anything."

"Do you really think that's true, that you're not good at anything?"

You nod.

"You woke up this morning. You're breathing. You're very good at doing those two things. You're taking up space and existing. You're listening. You're feeling. You do these things without even thinking about them. Is that not a sign of skill?"

"That doesn't make me a worthwhile person, though." Tears start forming in your eyes and your therapist hands you the tissue box.

"You don't have to do anything well to be a worthwhile person. You exist, and that enough makes life worth living. If you want to learn more then you can, but knowing everything won't increase your value. You're valuable just by being here. Your worth as a human being is not determined by what you can or cannot do, or what you do or don't know."

Your therapist stays quiet as you sob into multiple tissues. It takes several minutes for you to calm down enough to continue your session.

"I still can't help but feel like a burden to everyone though." You still find it hard to speak after crying so much.

"Those who see you as a burden will never be worth your time. People who want to be around you will stay around you, even if they can't be present in your life at all times."

Rain begins gently tapping at the office window.

"... wouldn't it just be easier to shut everyone out, then?" You point out.

"Well, sure... but then you would never find out who truly loved you, or find others who are going to love you despite it all."

Another moment of silence passes between the two of you before the clock chimes in the distance.

"Same time next week I presume?" Your therapist fills out an appointment card for you.

"That sounds good."

...

You forgot your umbrella. The rain has already begun to pour.

Y/N: Alright. I'm ready.

💛lil meow meow💛: ᕕ( ՞ ᗜ ՞ )ᕗ

💛lil meow meow💛: ON MY WAY!!!

A car speeds by while you're waiting and splashes you from head to toe in puddle water. You're lucky enough that your phone case is water proof and that your journal is in your bag, otherwise everything would've been ruined.

Weird. You haven't thought about the positives in a long time.

You carefully wipe the droplets from your phone before another text message pops up.

💛lil meow meow💛: [Uploaded a photo at 3:56 PM].

It was a photo of you from behind.

💛lil meow meow💛: Omg? There's just a cutie pie standing outside? Do you think they're single?

You turn to look in the direction the photo was taken, then Sloan snaps another photo of you.

💛lil meow meow💛: OMG they noticed me!!!

💛lil meow meow💛: They're walking towards me!!!

You open the car door and the warmth hits your damp face.

"Wow. Now there's a cute person in my car! No way!" They grin and gesture over to you.

You can't help but smile.

"Sorry I wasn't fast enough to pick you up before the rain started..." They add.

They reach over to hold your hand and give it a comforting squeeze.

"It's okay. I can shower later." You reply.

You look out the passenger side window at the world covered in gray. The sooner you could get home, the better.

"So, how did it go?" They ask.

For a moment you replay the conversation with your therapist in your mind. You're not sure if you want to bring it up.

"Well..." You start to say, but you choke back the rest of the words.

Tears form in your eyes and you turn farther way from your beloved to hide them. You attempt to focus on the street lights passing you by instead.

"It was okay."

A brief silence passes between the two of you.

"You can be honest with me." There was a genuine concern for you in their voice that you were all too familiar with.

You bite your lip and think about your therapist again.

"Do you think I'm a burden?"

The question seems to come from no where for Sloan– but for you, it's all you've been wondering for a very long time.

"No! Of course not! Why would I ever think that about you?" They answer almost a little too defensively.

"Because you're smart, and you already have your life figured out– and I'm just a nobody, really..."

"No, you're not. Not to me."

You wipe the oncoming tears with your sleeves. The weight of the world comes baring down on your shoulders once again. Hot breaths escape between choking sighs and you can't stop yourself from sobbing all over again.

"I'm sorry–" That's all you could repeat, over and over again, like a broken record.

"[Y/N]..."

You can hardly hear them over the sound of your downfall.

The crisis seemed like it lasted forever to you. Everything you've been keeping bottled up for so long comes pouring out all at once without any warning. Even though your heart still hurts, you can feel it becoming lighter with every passing minute.

You can't form words. All you can do now is cry, cry, cry.

So cry, you did.

For minutes on end, tears flood out from underneath your swollen, bloodshot eyes. Your face was pink and pain pounded in your head from all the upset. It felt like forever until you were calm enough to form coherent sentences again.

"I'm sorry you had to see that." Once again you find yourself apologizing for things beyond your control.

"There's no need to say you're sorry. Let's just get inside so you can get out of those wet clothes."

You didn't even realize you had made it home already.

...

One mental breakdown, shower and ibuprofen later you felt like a brand new person.

In the same cat meme mug from this morning your beloved sets down some hot chocolate for you to help you cheer up.

"Do you want to talk about it?" They ask.

You can feel them wrap a blanket around you before sitting down and scooping you up into the warmest hug you've ever received. You close your eyes and melt into their affection while placing your head on their chest to listen to their heartbeat.

"I guess I just feel worthless most of the time." You admit.

"But why? You're not worthless to me. Not one bit." They comfort you the best they can.

You can feel Sloan place their hand on the back of your head and gently stroke your hair.

"I feel bad for taking time away from you. You have everything in your life figured out. I can't imagine why you still come around to visit me."

"Because I love you." There's a softness to their reply that makes your heart feel safe and secure. "I love spending time with you, so I take time off to visit you. If I didn't want anything to do with you I'd be gone already."

You think about their words for a minute and wish you had something equally as nice to reply with, but instead drowsiness begins to fog your mind.

You open your mouth to speak but a yawn escapes first.

"Rest, mi vida. Don't let those thoughts bother you anymore. I love you so much–" They place a kiss to your head. "– and I'll love you even more when you wake up."

They let you lay down and listen to their heartbeat for a little while longer.

"You mean the world to me. I don't care about anything else right now– just you. I'm here for you. Everything else can wait."

"Promise?" You nuzzle into their chest, ready to fall asleep at any moment.

"I promise. I'll write it on my tombstone." They reply.

"I'll hold you to that."

"You'll have to wait and see. I plan on spending the rest of my life with you, first."

For the first time in a long time you felt yourself genuinely smile.

[babiebom]

Bachelors and what kind of ~dere they would be

A/N: I thought this would be something cool to write headcanons for especially because I've played through the Sebastian yandere mod and have watched vids on the others being yanderes. Personally I feel as if some of them don't really fit the yandere category and others would fit them more.

Tw: none as far as i know. Does sort of spoil one of Sam's heart events and a game event.

Word count: at least 10 bullet points per character

Sebastian

Kuudere

Describes as often plays it cool and even in the most stressful situations they're calm and collected. They never panic and often remain distant and analytical until the end.

I feel like Sebby doesn't often show his emotions, especially because he seems introverted.

But the thing is he doesn't seem like the shy uwu scared of people introverted he's more of a voluntary introvert and just prefers being along but has no problem interacting with people

So for that I'm saying he's more the type to always be calm around the person he likes, never making his feelings obvious and never treating them any different than he would treat anyone he sees as a friend.

Kinda reminds me of an anime scene(I forgot the name but its space themed)

Of where the girl basically confesses her feelings and calls the guy an idiot after they talk about what they plan for the future and she says her dream is to become his wife and why can't he see that

And his reaction is basically ? I thought we were already together what?

And she's like ???? You've never made it clear that you like me and he's like yeah didn't think that i had to? I thought we were already together.

He gives off those vibes.

I also feel as though if he did open up it would be in a nonchalant way, it wouldn't be dramatic or romantic I think he would just be stating his feelings as facts.

And I feel like people often forget that this man is a huge nerd and super smart at least in my opinion

I mean he codes from home and plays dnd.

Even if he isn't a robotics and super science nerd like Maru is I think he is a smart and rather analytical person. I don't think he would be on the emotional side of things

If you get together he doesn't change much but does show his affection through touch and acts of service rather than his words.

Harvey

Dandere

Described as shy, quiet, and asocial is most situations. Stays quiet to avoid conflict

I feel as even though he's the town doctor he doesn't have many friends

Like he's only close to Maru bc she works for him in the clinic

And we usually see him hanging out alone or in his room looking at planes and stuff

I feel as though if he developed feelings for you either you would notice right away with how weird he acts around you or you wouldn't notice at all because you assume he's quiet with everyone unless its medically related.

So maybe not shy but quiet does describe him.

Obviously he opens up around you little by little the more you interact with him but it takes a lot of effort on both if your parts

On yours you have to consistently bother him and talk to him which is a lot of work especially when its not reciprocated at first

And on his he has to allow himself to be vulnerable and open with a person, its even harder when you feel romantic feelings for that person because what if they don't really like you in that way or they decide they don't like you after getting to know you

Very sweet man when you get together, still quiet but in a more comfy way.

Shane

Tsundere

Described as hostile and cold on the outside and sweet and kind on the inside

And I feel like that exactly describes Shane

While he is an alcoholic(recovering or not based on how you see him and play the game)He is very sweet even if not to people other than you(once you get to know him), jas, and his chickens.

Does seem like the type that once he starts feeling things for you he would start helping in small ways but also tries to not make it obvious

Oh he sees you walking from the woods with a big ass bag of fiber rocks and wood?

He'll offer to carry it if you need help

Sees you out and about in town, asks what you're up to and if you need help with anything

But don't think that he'a doing this because he likes you

He doesn't he just wants to pay back the kindness you've given to him back to you so he doesn't owe you anything

Ends every sentence to you with stupid or idiot if it allows without seeming genuinely mean

Does really like you and slowly starts showing you that once you show you aren't going anywhere

Does still get incredibly flustered when you do something sweet for or to him

Though if you get together is more open with his affection.

Elliott

Yandere

Described as a person that is very loving and affectionate to their loved one until it becomes a constant obsession leading them to become overprotective, violent, and psychotic towards anyone they deem a threat to their loved one, even the loved one themself

First of all his yandere mod was the scariest one yet like ooof

And while he does not seem like a violent person

He is a writer, which means he is some sort of delusional, creative, and or imaginative that I think he could have a mental break and carry out the things he imagines. 

We see that due to him being a writer, he is basically a hermit because all he does is stay in his cabin and write all day

Like yeah he's friends with Leah but how often do you think he actually leaves his home seeking interaction?

I feel like he would meet you and then suffer from a writers block and its your fault because now all he can think about is you

You're his muse

And due to that he becomes obsessive over you, no one else can have you he needs you at the very least more than they do.

Would 1000 percent stalk you, in his mind he's just watching over you to make sure nothing happens to you

Whether that be in town, on your farm, in the mines...he has to keep you closeby.

Speaking as a writer that does get very obsessed with things to the point of me changing what i write about and how often I think about or daydream about it

I think he is the most likely candidate for this kind of 'love' towards a person

Your imagination can delude your thinking, paired with living in a cabin alone with only your thoughts and silence it's no wonder he would be slightly insane.

Sam

Bakadere

Described as clumsy, stupid, and lacking in common sense when dealing with things in their life, but also very optimistic, and having a carefree, child-like innocence.

While this may seem like I'm roasting him I'm not

I do think he sometimes seems clumsy or dumb or even maybe like a teen especially because he's just playing guitar or skateboarding or playing video games

But there are glimpses of him being responsible and caring

Like how he actually had a job, even if it's part time

Or during his heart event when Vincent asks if their dad is going to come home before we find out that he indeed does come home

He covers his true feelings with optimism and happiness even if he's worried, which makes me think he fits this.

He only wants his loved one to be happy, and while constant optimism may seem or be annoying so certain people, he wants to be that light in your life.

And because he's so optimistic he is naturally kinder to others, while others like Sebastian, Shane, or Haley are standoffish when you meet them, Sam is sweet and is happy to meet you which translates well into getting to know you and then shifting into a romantic relationship

So while he may seem dumb to others, even to you with how positive he's being he's actually far from it even if he is a little reckless and clumsy sometimes

He turns down the constant optimism after getting together, but never stops being positive towards you, no matter if you succeed or fail, he's there to pick you up again with kind words and unwavering support.

Alex

Also Bakadere

but for a totally different reason

the dude is basically a himbo, though some of the things he says can be seen as iffy or mysogynistic

im pretty sure he doesn't mean any of it though, and while he can come off as dumb and out of touch he is shown to be sweet and caring and using his frat boy persona as a way of keeping people at an arms length

due to that i see him as similar but different to Sam

both boys seem kind of dumb, annoyingly optimistic, and sort of innocent in a way.

and both boys tend to use that as a surface personality, and until you actually take time to know them(Sam's worries, Alex's background and current worries) they seem like the type of people to be positive in any situation

Also seems as if he would take on a leader role simply because everyone voted for him to be it because of his positivity.

another thing is how certain(though inside he's not as) that he will become a gridball player.

Like the dude only talks positively about his dreams and is constantly working towards his goal

as well as we see in his dialogue that the farmer does indeed sometimes get annoyed at his words such as when he says things like "what why're you looking at me like that"

exactly as an anime character in this role would do.

Though after marriage is still sorta a dummy which is low key kinda cute.

[gretahayes]

for the ask game, timkonbart with 44 please?

44. “You���ve always felt like home.”

"I'm having a day," Bart says, phasing into being in Kon's bedroom.

Kon hums. He's sprawled on his bedroom floor in a position that doesn't look comfortable, but he either doesn't notice or doesn't care. Bart thinks he's maybe having a day too.

"Where's Rob?" Kon shrugs. "I want Rob." Bart frowns and disappears, then reappears with a confused Tim in his arms. "Hey Rob."

"Hi Bart," Tim says. He nods at Kon as Bart sets him down. "Hi, Kon. What's up?"

"I missed you," Bart says. He feels...unfocused. Unmoored, but not in the fun way that lets him time travel and hop through dimensions. In the way that makes him feel like he's fuzzy around the edges and if people stop looking at him, forget about him, he's gonna fade away forever and never be seen again. "I missed you," he repeats, because Tim can read between the lines.

Tim softens, catching the unsaid words in the way he always does. "Alright."

Bart feels a gentle, comforting weight, like a heavy blanket or strong hug, settle around him, and he feels more anchored. He shoots Kon a grateful look. "Thanks."

Kon wiggles his fingers in acknowledgement, and finally floats over to them. "Hi Rob."

"Hi Kon," Tim repeats. He looks between them, assessing, and Bart isn't sure what he sees but it must be really pitiful because he softens even more, in that worried way of his.

"Stop frowning," Kon says, and ironically, frowns. "We don't look that bad."

"You look like you'd benefit from a trip back home," Tim says. "Both of you."

"That's why I got you," Bart says. "You've always felt like home to me."

Tim pauses, and smiles in the awkward, hesitant way he does sometimes, when he doesn't know the right thing to say and figures not talking at all is probably the smartest choice. "Aww. Well. Thanks." Tim gets back to solving-problems-mode. "Bart, could you get us blankets and pillows for-"

A whoosh, and Bart's back with an his arms full of blankets and pillows. He assembles them into what he assumes Tim wants, a blanket fort-ish contraption on the floor. "What now?" He thinks he should know what now, but he feels slow and sluggish and has he mentioned he feels fuzzy? But not in the way he can't run, in the way his brain is slow, because he can run just fine. But if he can run, his brain should be fine too, because his speed's the reason his brain is the way it is-

Kon drops onto the blanket fort, and tugs the two of them with his TTK. Bart makes a surprised noise, but Tim looks like he'd been expecting it, and doesn't bother stopping himself from landing in a jumbled heap. Tim tugs and pushes and says something, and they rearrange limbs and torsos so nobody's being crushed, but the pressure is nice. Comforting. And they're intertwined enough that Bart doesn't have to worry about fading. They've got him.

He doesn't know how much time passes, but he feels less fuzzy by the time Kon moves for the first time. He twists a bit so he's face to face with Tim, and they stare at each other for a few seconds. Tim offers a smile.

Kon turns to look at Bart. He blinks, and Bart can't pinpoint what exactly it is, but something in his eyes looks clearer. More present. He smiles, and Bart smiles back. Kon turns to Tim, still smiling, and Tim laughs.

"You guys feeling better?" He asks, even though he already knows the answer to that.

Bart flops onto his stomach, ignoring now-verbal Kon's protests and planting a big fat kiss on Tim. He's aiming for just the general vicinity of Tm's face and is impressed with himself when he manages to land it on his cheek.

Tim laughs again, pushing his face away. "Germs, Bart, gross, did you even disinfect before sharing your extra-dimensional cooties—?"

(ask game)

[celabi]

The daily conundrum of trying to decide if sex with scummy Scara would be hot or if like bro would nearly bite my nipple or clit off because he tried to give it a light little nip but got to over-eager and just bit way too hard- Him being a raging virgin doesn't fucking help either cause it's like he has no clue what he's doing--

Like bruh I do not think I'd be able to trust him topping in any capacity- Bro would probably be the guy who slips it into the wrong hole halfway through and then just doesn't even notice- If not that, idiot would find a way to break his own dick somehow- Bro probably doesn't even know what lube is (that or he knows and was like "pffft that won't be needed") so his dumbass probably ends up tearing the skin on his dick or worse ends up giving his darling a tear internally-

THE AMOUNT OF SEX RELATED INJURIES OR ACCIDENTS I SEE HAPPENING IF THIS DUMBASS WAS A TOP IS INSANE, HE SHOULD BE BANNED FROM EVER GAINING DOM RIGHTS-

I don't even think he can be trusted with like masturbating in front of his darling- ESPECIALLY IF THERE'S TOYS INVOLVED- Like tell me this isn't the guy that darling has to call an ambulance for because his dumbass heard them ask him to use a dildo in front of them (without full instruction on how because they just assumed he knew and he didn't say otherwise because he was like "Oh yeah nah I got this") and he managed to get it stuck up there- Like he can't be trusted to do anything sexual on his own accord I fucking swear-

Oh and God forbid darling try to do anything involving BDSM- He'd mess that up even if he was subbing- Unless his darling knows what they're doing well enough to clue in on where to cut things off for him they're probably going to end up with his yes man ass passing out cause they choked him out too hard and he didn't bother to tap out when he should've- That or he ends up being very uncomfortably tied up because he got asked if the rope was too tight and the fucking nobhead, trying to impress his darling on how kinky he is, looked them dead in the eye and was like "Not tight enough"- Dumbass ended up with some real nasty rope burn and a lecture from his darling about how important it is not to go over his limits with this stuff-

AND THAT'S JUST FOR LIGHTER KINKS, GOD FORBID HIS DARLING GETS HIM INTO ANYTHING HEAVIER- Like fuck imagine knife-play/blood-play with his probably anaemic as shit ass???? He'd be a nightmare waiting to happen since he listened to the safe word talk and then decided "I won't be needing that"- Like you educate him thoroughly on his SSC's and he was like "I won't need taht I'll be fine" no the fucking nobhead was in fact NOT fine, he's just so SO stupid

Like he's such a fucking idiot with sex in my head I swear to god, I don't think he can be trusted with anything related to it- Honestly should be banned from sex lmfao- He's an absolute dumbass (affectionate)- He has to stay on them V-plates for a little while longer fr fr though-

OMGMSNSJS NO BECAUSE THIS IS SO TRUE 🤞 he’s so clueless and has no idea what to do, relying only on the porno’s he’s watched but even then, he can’t seem to do what he’s learned (idk he looks like a stuck porn kinda guy so it’s not really working)

Probably tried to finger your clit cause he was that inexperienced 😭

Anyways, after the first couple times with him, he slowly gets the hang of it and just fucks you properly. Ehhhh he’s just sitting there and doing what you say like a good boy 🤭

[pascaloverx]

Strangers?

Part One

next part

Author's note: This fanfic is set in the creation of Jenny Han. Conrad Fisher and other characters mentioned in the future do not belong to me. I hope you like this fanfic, depending on how it goes, I'll decide if this fic will have more parts or just this one. This fanfic is recommended for all audiences, there will be no adult content in it, only possible inappropriate language and alcohol consumption.

A trip to Cousins Beach, they told you it's good to clear your mind. What a beautiful lie that was. I'm stuck at a convenience store for two minutes, waiting for a guy to move his car so I can get home. He doesn't seem bothered by blocking me, though. It must be the summer affecting his head, maybe the heat or maybe he just has a hobby of standing behind a car that could run over him.

"You're too young to be thinking about leaving this world, you know?" You say to the boy in front of you. His brown hair is somewhat long, falling into his eyes that you can't quite tell if they're blue or green, but you can identify that they are teary.

"Is there an ideal age to think about it?" he responds, looking out the car window at you. You wonder if it would have been better to endure a few more minutes to reach your destination, but then you remember you were in a hurry and needed a restroom. Plus, you had to do some shopping, or else you would go hungry and thirsty.

"My mom used to say that if you're not old enough to legally drink in this country, you don't have important enough problems to sacrifice your life. Seems kind of dumb saying that now..." You smile as you think your mother's logic doesn't make any sense.

"How do you know I can't drink legally?" He says as he stares at you.

"You're standing in front of a store that literally sells alcoholic beverages, yet you don't have any with you." You watch as you stand still talking to the driver who stops you from leaving.

"Maybe I'm waiting for someone here, you wouldn't know." He says with such presumption that you wonder if he didn't notice you arrived there long before him.

"Kid, I've been here for almost thirty minutes waiting for your car to move so I can leave. Either you're waiting for a ghost or you definitely aren't old enough to drink. Do you want to keep arguing, or are you going to ask me to get you a drink so we can finally go our separate ways?"

"Would you do that for a total stranger?" He almost seems hopeful, in a melancholic way.

"Not at all, but if you asked me, we'd know the answer and you'd move the car behind me." It even seems like you are going to take responsibility for what will happen to him if he drinks in the state he is in.

"You treat me as if I were a baby, but you don't seem much older than me." He's right, you can't be much older than him.

"Guess I'm old enough to have a beer without a fake ID. So, what's it gonna be? Are you gonna let me through?"

"Well, since you asked so politely..." Your ironic tone is quite amusing. He finally moves his car from behind mine. I'm about to get into my car when I feel like I should be a bit nicer to this boy.

You make a U-turn, and he's standing by his car, looking like he's contemplating his next move. You wave at him.

"What's your name?" you ask as you approach his car window. You can't help but think you must be losing your mind.

"Conrad Fisher, and yours?" He seems suspicious of your curiosity. You can only laugh, realizing you'd find it odd too if someone was trying to get rid of you one moment and asking for your name the next.

"My name is Y/N. Listen... you seem to be in a mess, and I'm equally in a mess. How about having some company for the rest of the day, and tomorrow we can pretend this never happened?" You're surprised at how simple it sounds, even though it feels strange. Your mom would scold you so much for suggesting this to a stranger.

"Does your proposal involve drinks?" Conrad asks, pushing his hair back. You look at him smiling as he asks, he must really be in need of some company.

"It can involve drinks if you promise to let me drive. I don't want to be responsible for your demise." You say, looking at him seriously while he nods in agreement.

He takes the car keys and fiddles with something inside his car. I guess you both silently decided that you'll leave in your car. While he does that, you grab the beers and ice cream.

You get into the car carrying the items you just bought, and Conrad is already sitting in the driver's seat.

"Who said you're driving my car?" You say as you place the purchases on the back seat.

"I think it's only fair not to burden you. If I'll be drinking while you stay sober, the least I can do is drive for a bit while you rest. Plus, I gave up my car, so..." Conrad explains.

"Has anyone ever told you that you're lucky to be cute? It's the only reason I'm not kicking you out of here and leaving." You remark, half-jokingly, trying to lighten the tension.

"If that's your way of trying to see if I'll get offended, know that you just complimented me. Keep trying, old lady." He says, trying to be funny. It seems like he's already feeling better.

"Just so you know, I'm only Y/A, so..." He smiles again. You slowly begin to notice that maybe it was a good idea to keep the frowning young man company.

"I knew you weren't that much older than me. You almost fooled me." He says as you roll your eyes. You can't believe you fell for his trick.

"Alright, funny guy, buckle up and let's go before I push you out of the car." He fastens his seatbelt, and soon you both head towards the beach. You hope that at least for today, all your problems will disappear while you spend time with a strangely pleasant stranger.

[crabonfire]

Hi! Loved your TF2 “one bed tropes” part 1! So glad you’re back writing too! Your ability to really capture each of the guys’ personalities is fabulously uncanny. You really make them come to life.

I was wondering how you think the mercs would react to their s/o being insecure/jealous that someone out of their age range is flirting with them. That is to say, the s/o is the same age as the merc and the ‘flirter’ is either younger (in the case of Spy or Medic, etc) or older (as for Scout). I hope that made sense!

Thank you!

YOOOOO THANK U SO MUCH 😭😭😭 I APPRICIATE IT thats very nice ahshshdh 😋😋😋 I'm smiling so hard rn ty :)

but yeah totally! I love this idea

Mercs reacting to an upset reader because merc was getting flirted on by someone not their age.

characters: all mercenaries

warnings: none

note: reader gender is not specified!!!

situaaation

You and Merc were at a gathering, just hanging out. You go to get drinks for the both of you, but when you come back you see thay they're being flirted with by a random person. You get a bit upset, and the insecurities start getting to you :(

♡Scout♡

• doesn't catch onto the flirting, because he is not interested in them at all so he just thinks the person flirting is just a real nice person.

• he gets lost in the convo with the person and doesn't even notice you see them together. you don't know what it is but your heart swells, your hands are gripping the glasses but you calm yourself down.

'Man, jealousy is not my colour.'

They talk for a bit until the person has to leave, when you come over and hand him the drink he notices how dry your being.

"Yo, you good toots? Sum' happen?"

"Oh no, I'm uh...good."

He can read you like a book. You never get quiet with him unless something happened.

"Yeah, no, we're not doin' this. C'mon."

He takes you by the hand and leads you both somewhere quieter, his gaze on you is one of concern.

"What happened? Did I do sum'?"

"No no! It's just...I don't know."

He gives you a moment to speak,

"You know that...lady you spoke to a bit ago? I don't know why but, the way she spoke to you just sorta made me feel...jealous."

"Jealous? Aw babe, its cute that your jealous but you have nothin' to be jealous of."

"Yeah but...I don't know. She was so confident with you, she was...real pretty too. I just got kinda...worried you know? Like, she could replace me easily. It's stupid- just ignore I said anything."

You smile wearily and awkwardly laugh to move on from the situation and looks away. He frowns, he can feel his heart shattering at your words. He cups your cheek to make you focus on him.

"Y/N, yer the coolest most amazing and awesome person I have ever met. Yer cute, handsome, real pretty too. I'd never even think of replacin' you, got that? Your stuck with me, and I'm stuck with you."

Tears well up in your eyes as you melt into his touch and hold his hand with yours, kissing his palm and smiling softly.

"God, I love you Jer. Thank you, your also the coolest, most awesome, and amazing person I've ever met."

He leans in to kiss your forehead, letting go of your cheek and tightening his hold on your hand.

"You wanna go home and watch some movies at my place?"

"Hell yeah. This place is frickin' boring."

♡Soldier♡

• I know soldier is dense and all, but I can't really see him to be dense towards flirting.

• so you probably don't need to be jealous? Because the moment another person goes up to him to flirt with him he will get very angry.

• "ILL HAVE YOU KNOW I AM TAKEN BY A VERY LOVELY PERSON! AND I AM NOT LOOKING TO BE WITH ANYBODY ELSE OTHER THAN THEM! DO NOT BOTHER ME AGAIN, OR I WILL MAKE YOU GO THROUGH HELL!"

• so..no he's not really someone you need to be jealous of. But, if there were to be a scenario where someone was going over his head and you got jealous, I think he'd find your jealousy quite...attractive?

• he's always been the rough and leader type, so when you take initiative by talking to him later alone about how you felt so aggravated by the person who was flirting with him and how you felt upset, he felt bad but also kind of think its sweet.

of course he will tell you that he belongs to you and only you, going as far as creating you a fake certificate that says your his and he's yours. (it's so sweet) but he will also tell you how cute you are when your jealous. He loves that possessiveness to you!

• I can't say much about jealousy when it comes to the either of you, he doesn't get jealous often.

♡Pyro♡

• he doesn't see the signs of the flirting. because like...boy has major self esteem issues and is taking any form of flirting as a sign of friendship, its a sad way to think but it's also because of the fact he wouldn't think anyone would flirt with him now that he's taken.

• so when he notices you gripping the cups your holding and having a slight frown to your face, he instantly gets worried and ignores the person entirely. He's very attentive to small details, so he knows somethings up.

"Mmhud hhuuhhdhmmahd? Mmhhud hhuuh mmhhuhahh?" (What happened? Are you okay?)

"Yeah-sorry I just...I don't know. That person's flirting with you, ya know?"

"HUUH." (OH.)

he deadass didn't know LMFAOOO like yeah like I said, good at reading tones but he genuinely didn't have any interest in the person so he didn't pay much attention.

"It's silly but...I don't know-forget it. Here, I got us our drinks."

"Hhhuhhh..mmmhuhda." (Oh..okay.)

For the rest of the party he notices your mood has changed from the happy go lucky one before, so when the party gets quiet he leads you over and sits with you outside.

He asks whats wrong and he frowns when he realises that you were upset because you thought he'd leave you for said person. He gives you a tight hug, and pats your back.

"Hhuhda, Hhuhd mmhuhhda mmmhff mmhuhh mmhhuhd huuhm huuud huuhch."

(Y/N, I'd never leave you for some side bitch.)

That made you chuckle a bit, he continued on explaining about how much you mean to him. It was...tooth rottening shit, I'm talking the shit you cry at from Disney movies.

He's honestly confused on why you'd be jealous because in reality HES SCARED of you leaving him. He's never felt such a connection with someone so understanding and sweet like you, it honestly hurts him that you'd even think this way and it stings even more that you don't realise how your perfect for him.

You two go home early and just spend the night cuddling, he let's you talk more about it and that night you two learn more about yourselves.

♡Demoman♡

• this man is not dense. just like soldier, he knows when someone is tryna get with him.

• so I genuinely don't know any scenarios where you'd be jealous because...this man clings onto you like a fucking KOALA.

• he's the one taking the drinks for you, actually.

• I genuinely cannot see you ever needing to be jealous over him, as hard as I try to write nothing comes up in my head LMFAOOO

• he's not easily jealous either, so yall don't really need to worry about anything.

• if someone tries to ask him out, he'd just sling his arm over your shoulder while he talks to them about another topic. Giving them a smug look and even kissing you on the cheek when you have to go and get something.

♡Heavy♡

• When he notices how quiet you get when this random lady in front of the both of you starts flirting and egging him on, he immediately just shuts her up.

• He politely tells her that he is happily taken, holding your hand and asking her to respect that. If she understands and backs away it's fine, but if she starts to side eye you...hold him down cause he'll beat her ass.

• "Are you okay, lisichka?"

"I guess."

He doesn't know why your being quiet, and instead feels like he's the one to blame...like he did something wrong. He's a mature man, so he wouldn't beat around the bush about it.

"Please be honest with me, did I do something Y/N?"

"Oh-no no sorry...its just-" You sigh "I don't know, I sometimes wonder why your with me. Like...you could do better. You know?"

He let's you vent to him for a bit but truth be told he can't help but shake his head in disagreement and grip your hand when he does.

"You are the most wonderful person I have ever met. No words can describe how much I care for you, moya lyubov. Whatever it is you are thinking, I am sorry. But I love you, and not anybody else. If there is person who make you feel like this, I will crush their tiny head. Da?"

"...yea. I... thanks babe."

"Of course. Do not worry, Heavy will never leave your side, lisichka."

• he holds your hand the entire night and glares at anybody who even tries to get close to you, or him.

♡Engineer♡

• like demo, he's not dense in any sense. But I have a feeling for some reason, he'd like to see you jealous. In fact, he'd find it quite cute.

• but at this moment he was enjoying himself too much to realise that the person who was listening to him ramble was actually trying to flirt with him.

• it was a junior engineer, you saw how he smiled at them and something in you sortve broke. They looked so calm, collected, and smart. Honestly speaking, you don't understand much of what Engie usually talks about but you still like hearing about it. But seeing someone who does know, with their stupidly good hair and stupidly attractive self...that made you feel a bit upset.

• Engie had noticed you coming back with the drinks, having that same usual soft smile on his face when he greets you. But he can tell by your strained smile that something is bothering you, how you lightly grip the glass in your hands, he can tell you know, he's not dumb.

It clicks in his head, he takes the drink from you and excuses himself from the junior engineer, asking you if you want to be somewhere quieter. You agree, letting him take the both of you outside.

• "Sugar, are you alright?"

He doesn't even waste time, because he knows you. He knows how easily you downgrade yourself in the face of other people, he knows. You don't say it, but he's been with you long enough to understand what those hating glances you throw at yourself in the mirror mean.

"I...man."

The both if you sit in silence for a bit.

"You don't hafta tell me if ya don't wanna honey bee, I'm not forcin you to."

"Yeah...I'm-I just...I guess I feel a bit weird? I don't know how to explain it. Like, the person you talked to...they were so smart. So...soft spoken, so dignified...It makes me wonder why be with me when you have people like that approaching you."

He frowns, you look away but he keeps that worried stare on you.

"Like-why me? I'm such a dork and there's so much people out there who are better compared to me. I'm just some pathetic person you just so happened to meet."

"Hey-no, don't you dare say that about yourself."

Your attention is back on him now, his face is stern.

"Darlin' you are the sweetest and kindest soul I have ever laid my eyes on. You are perfect in every single aspect, and I could give less of a damn to the people around me. You got that?"

• His tone gets a bit rough, but he means well. You know he does, he always does. You can't help the tears that start to form in your eyes, he quickly notices and wipes them away, cupping your cheek and giving you a caring smile.

"Dontcha ever worry about that ever again alright? I love you, so so much. Nothing anyone says or do will ever change how I think about you. You are perfect."

He hugs you tightly, rubbing circles on your back as he let's you cry.

brb gonna sob I wish he was real

♡Medic♡

• I don't think medic would be the type to like social gatherings (unless its a topic he likes), so he tends to be at quieter places. While your out getting drinks, he sits by a quiet part of the room by himself, waiting for you patiently.

• a girl sits by him, giving him a smile. He returns one too, to be polite of course.

"You come here often?"

Oh boy. Not this.

He didn't wanna be here in the first place and now he has to TALK to people? Cmon Y/N where are you.

"No! Zhis is a social gathering...and it is my first time being here."

"Ah, it's my first time too. My names Angela, you?"

"My coworkers call me Medic."

"Pleasure to meet you Medic."

The convo just goes on, but honestly medic isn't even paying attention at this point. He just wants OUT of this conversation.

• When he sees you back with the drinks in your hand he instantly lights up, getting up from the chair and going to greet you.

"There you are! Sorry it took a while, the ball room is CROWDED."

"Ah, it is alright mein liebe. Now, let's go."

"HUH? Go where?"

He doesn't even say anything else and just walks away with you outside, not even giving you a chance to look at Angela's pissed off face.

• when you both are finally alone, he sighs and chugs the glass of champagne you got him.

"Woahhh there buddy, slow down."

"Zhat was HORRIBLE. Zhe woman I was talking to was so incredibly boring, she went on and ooonnnnn about how she's making a new...'makeup line' the ingredients she told me about are NOT skin friendly. It honestly bothers me how so many morons are at zhis gathering."

He just goes on and on, you have to stop him from breaking the glass of champagne from how much he's gripping it.

"Woah okay okay-lets just go home okay? The people here are kinda annoying. One guy kept on trying to ask for my number even though I told him I was taken."

He stops

"Oh really? And, where is this gentleman?"

"...nevermind. forget I said anything."

"No no, tell me. I just want to meet them."

"Yeah let's get back. It's late."

♡Sniper♡

• nope. no.

• he sees someone walking up to him? Automatically just runs away.

• he is also clinging onto you the entire time, or staying outside to wait for you. No fucking way is he having HUMAN CONVERSATIONS. FUCK THAT SHIT.

• yeah, sorry. He'd probably get jealous of you pretty easily though!

♡Spy♡

• oh now this is interesting.

• this mf would ACTIVELY make you jealous. Like the asshole he is.

• now sadly, this asshole is being a bigger asshole than usual, because he doesn't take into consideration that you are insecure.

• so when he sees you having tears in your eyes, gripping the glasses and having a slight frown when he's jokingly flirting with another person, automatically just drops everything.

• he grabs you by the waist and kisses you, wiping your tears away and cupping your cheek.

"I'm so sorry mon couer, it seems I have went over line. I would never love anyone else, it was merely a terrible joke." He will literally just take you out that night and make out with you. Buying you gifts and taking you to cafes, and repeatedly apologising whenever you think about it.

He doesn't quite understand why your insecure, but he will listen to your rants anyways.

"Ma belle, you are as radiant as the sun, as sweet as sugar, and as delightful as the night sky. I would not trade you for anything or anyone. Nothing can ever separate us, because I have fallen for you. I am forever yours, and you are mine."

corny ahh mf (I want him inside of me)

hi!!

I'm so sorry for...not writing for like a month or more HAHHAHAHAHAHHA shit has been so rough lately. Anyways WOO I'm writing again.

[orcboxer]

having painstakingly looked through every palworld creature design, I can confidently say I ain't interested. I wanted my negative first impression to be wrong but lord amighty it does not look better up close.

I was an absolute pokemon kid growin up and I love seeing people's fakemon and fangames and the idea of a poke-like game appeals to me, so I have a lot of thoughts. if you feel defensive of palworld then uhhhh don't read this because tldr I think it looks awful

I thought it looked bad when it was announced so I wasn't paying close attention, but lookin through the pals quickly killed what little interest might have been lurking in me. like I don't wanna be unfair to anybody tryna make pokemon-like games, but these things weren't made with love I can tell you that for sure. there's maybe like 5 that look pretty good and original but the rest.... where do I begin

So first thing, the ripoff pokemon designs. I thought people were exaggerating but oh my god, they weren't. I would be disappointed to see one knockoff pokemon model, but there are dozens of them holy shit. Like at least half the dex is badly-tweaked pokemon models. This alone is enough to completely turn me off to the game because creature design is the heart and soul of this genre so if you ain't even gonna bother making your own damn creatures, what's the fuckin point? Even on some of the more "original" designs, I can point to at least one element that was straight up copy/pasted from an existing pokemon.

Second thing, recycled models within the game. Why do so many bird pals use the same (ripped off) body model? Why do so many pals suffer from same-face syndrome? The first pal I saw was Chillet, I thought it was cute. When I looked through the pals, I kept thinking "oh that face looks like Chillet. oh hey that face looks like Chillet. that one too." The overall effect of this is that a majority of the designs are forgettable, they blur together and feel indistinct from one another. the dex feels increasingly hollow with each reused asset. if you got 10 bird designs and 6 of them look the same, you really only got 5 bird designs.

Third thing (sort of. it's related to the other two), I noticed that there are no object-mon designs in palworld, which I would guess is intentional. I get the feeling that the devs were like, "object-mon are stupid, everything has to look like a creature," which is a common discourse topic in poke-like fan communities, and I think that maybe this played a part in the reusing of assets, because making animalistic creatures that look both natural and distinct from each other is hard! Trying to fill a whole dex with no inorganic-ish creatures is a daunting task, and at a certain point you either need a lot of time, or a lot of artists, otherwise you get same-face syndrome and heavy asset recycling. (I personally enjoy object-mons, as they're reminiscent of yokai, it's like hey here's a mundane object that has been inhabited by a little spirit! I think it's cute.)

Fourth thing, the silhouettes are too busy. Chillet works because it's simple and distinct. Most pals, though, have too many features going on at once, and you couldn't really play "who's that pokemon" with them. Again, this is a consequence of trying to mix-and-match the same pool of assets instead of designing from scratch. In order to make them look more distinct from each other you have to just add a bunch of unnecessary frills and appendages that makes for a cluttered visual impression.

Fifth thing, varying degrees of detail? Some of those pals have smooth, almost textureless skin/fur, but then others like jormuntide have super detailed texture? (also I know I've seen jormuntide's face before, it's from a different game on the tip of my tongue but I can't place it right now, but that's beside the point) You generally want to keep your creatures relatively consistent in terms of like, level of texture detail. It's like some of them are just higher resolution. Which if I'm being honest makes me think they stole assets from more than just Pokemon.

Finally, edginess. Maybe this is just me being too cynical but it feels like this game hates Pokemon. It feels like middle schoolers making jokes about hurhur what if somebody killed Barney the Dinosaur with a gun. The whole making them work in factories and butchering them? Who is the target audience here? There's a pal called Hangyu which vaguely resembles a noose and its dex entry says it was used to execute people by hanging them and also ripping their skin off....Come on man.

in terms of pal design, I give palworld 2/10 because Chillet is cute

[arabella-s-arts]

Watched the new atla show. And now I will share my thoughts because I need to put them somewhere.

I agree with people that it kind of fell flat. More like an impersonation than the actual show. Also, people are right, where is Katara's rage? I'm not going to dive into it, because people already have, but Katara is stubborn and righteous, so where'd they put those qualities?

I wish the show would stop telling us everything. Like, stop telling me that Ozai thought finding the Avatar would be impossible, and sent Zuko on this quest anyway. I know, it's obvious. I don't need to be told the subtext, that's why it's subtext. Subtality could do this show a world of good.

Zhao's death sucked. It was perfect how it was in the original, it showed Zuko's kindness, and Zhao's hubris being his downfall was perfect. Also, this isn't necessarily a complaint, just something I noticed, Zhao feels different in the show. A guy with similar aspirations and ideas, yes, but not the same guy we all hate.

The acting wasn't always the greatest, but I can't tell if it's actually the actor's fault or script (probably script).

I wish Sokka was involved in the Jet plotline, he played a big part in it originally, and it really showed his true character.

Why did Katara and Aang never get any actual training in Northern Water Tribe? That's what they were there to do. Somehow, magically Katara became a master waterbender, because she what? Believed in herself? That's not how learning a skill works. Imagine trying to learn the flute, you're confident, and you figured out on your own how to play a few notes. But you still need someone to teach you the rest of the notes, how to trill, how to read the sheet music, etc. You can't learn everything just from confidence.

The costumes bothered me so much. Sokka and Katara's coats looked so light weight, which is probably more comfortable for the actors, but those coats could not shield you from a light breeze, much less a frozen tundra. Also someone pointed out that their clothes don't actually look worn, and they're right.

What on earth was the scarf scene? Why was it there? What was the point? I am not a Zutara shipper (though I have no hate for the shippers, just dislike for the ship), and now online is just going to be posts about that.

Was Suki just not wearing her warrior make-up because she had to kiss Sokka? Either way, it's still upsetting. The one time she doesn't wear her warrior make-up (which is an honor to wear) is when she's finally in a real fight, and on the day Kyoshi shows up too. Also, no Sokka wearing warrior make-up? I get if they couldn't fit it in, but it's still a bit sad.

I don't understand them getting rid of the fact that Aang ran away, I think it really makes his character more complex as he struggles to take on the responsibilities of the Avatar.

They sorta switched Sokka and Katara's roles in the Omashu tunnels, which I don't get.

Having Zuko fight Ozai in the Agni Kai was a terrible idea.

I'm sorry to say this, because I don't like Zuko being in pain. But Zuko's scar is smaller and a lot more understated than in the animation. I don't know much about burnt tissue, or how it will scar, especially with their technology. But we rarely see heroes with facial scars beyond a line through the eye or something, I don't want it taken away. The scar doesn't even seem to reach his ear. And I'm sad about them confirming his sight was fine. Zuko with some hearing and vision loss is technically just a headcanon. But then why did Zuko only leave his unscarred side up when sleeping around people he didn't trust in the animated version?

I could tell that Aang was airbending during it, so it wasn't really flying. But it's a little too similar, especially considering how significant flying is in Korra.

The thing that bothered me the most was Yue's death. Why was it barely acknowledged?! Yue made a huge sacrifice, but instead we're making up a plotline that causes Aang to have the spotlight instead. And when Sokka was talking to Arnook about Yue, somehow the conversation became focused on Sokka, and his insecurity, instead of someone they both deeply miss (though Sokka and Yue's relationship development could've been better). Sokka is joking around again by the end of the episode, it feels like her death never happened! And why make her a fish! No offense to fishes, but it feels less impactful, and in the original, we could see how Yue was able to keep some of herself alive in the way she presents herself as a spirit, she doesn't do that here.

Some things I liked:

Zuko being upset about Aang stealing his journal.

Sokka and Suki had really good chemistry (though, the show doesn't really give us a reason why Suki likes him, she seems annoyed with him when they first meet).

The effects were good, and I liked a lot of the fight scenes.

Kyoshi.

Oma and Shu being lesbians.

That one lady hitting Zuko for trying to hurt Aang.

Suki being awkward and beating up the guy she likes.

I am impressed with how they were able to overlap some story lines. That must have been difficult to figure out.

The sets.

Azula.

[imagobin]

❄️Winter King Caring for Reader HCs❄️

I got covid yayyyyy so here is how I think Winter King would take care of Reader if they got sick, enjoy! In this, Reader is a bodyguard for WK, whom he has hidden feelings for.

Finding out you're sick:

It takes a bit for Winter King to notice you're sick, either because you try your best to play it off as just a small cold, or because he's being kidnapped by Candy Queen so often he barely has any time to see how you're feeling.

That is until after a particularly tough rescue mission, you quite literally collapse in his arms due to your fever getting too high.

He freaks out, because this has never happened before. He places a hand on your forehead and notices you're burning up, so despite how you're usually the one who carries him back to his ice castle, this time he creates an ice carriage with his powers so you don't further exert yourself.

Yes, he could always do that, he just enjoyed being carried around by you, but even he isn't heartless enough to make you do that when you can barely stand on your own. He may not show it often, but he does care about you.

He notices you're shivering on the ride back, so he places his jacket on you to shield you a bit from the cold. He's fine with just a shirt, cold doesn't bother him at all thanks to the crown's powers.

A realization:

Once you two are back in the castle, he immediately orders his Ice Scouts to make your room extra cozy, and soon you are resting in your bed, in whatever position you feel better in, wrapped in blankets.

Winter King has never seen you so sick, so he's concerned to say the least. He has a tough time establishing serious connections with others due to his past, but seeing you in such a state is really making him realize how important you are for him.

When he notices the way he's feeling, he's quite overwhelmed and goes to his laboratory to try and take his mind off of things, while he leaves the Ice Scouts to take care of you. He just can't fathom the idea of caring so deeply for someone... not again, after what happened with Betty and Marceline.

He starts spiraling... what if you never recover from this? He briefly considers making an ice clone of you if the worst comes, but he quickly tosses that idea to the side.

WK will not let you get worse, he's going to make sure you recover from this fever! This is something very important for him... the proof that he can still save people if he wishes.

The small things he does for you:

Winter King comes back from his lab... with hot cocoa, or any other warm drink he knows you're going to enjoy.

He sits beside you on the bed, dismissing the Ice Scouts, saying he's going to take it from here, and begins to softly run his hand through your hair. His hand is soft and cool, which is a very pleasant feeling since your forehead is burning hot.

The following days, he's the one who always brings you your meals, making sure they're your favorites. He also ensures you're always staying hydrated.

He's never really made such big efforts to make someone happy, but he'd be lying if he said seeing you smile and thank him didn't make his heart flutter.

He also sings to you, 100% convinced listening to his voice will make your illness go away. It doesn't make the process any faster... but it is very pleasant, so you comply.

He's very protective of you, making sure all of your needs are met, keeping that up even when you start feeling better, finding that... it's pretty difficult to stop treating you so well... he might have to promote you from bodyguard to partner if things keep going that way... now wouldn't that be funny?

[firstyok]

- Our Skyy 2 x The Eclipse End Notes -

So, I had to do this because I've never been happier in my life, until I witnessed my babyboys akkaye returning back with a passionate love sequel this month. You have no idea how much I adored, loved and enjoyed these 2 episodes bit by bit, it filled my entire heart with ecstasy, love and joy. So, here I am again, ready to appreciate the hell out of these outstanding episodes for my AkkAye babies. Stay with me, and hear me out on this.

Below, I've addressed the core main things of these episodes which I loved, enjoyed and adored the most. Honestly, every single second of these episodes were a chef's kiss for me, but of course I can't write single thing out there. I would run out of images, and I hate making part two's. So, here I am, with the best and main things about this show, for which I'd basically keep watching these episodes over and over again until I witness SanRay.

BEST THINGS ABOUT THE EPISODES

1. Message on Perspective and Communication in a Relationship

Let's rule out the complex part first. The Eclipse original show ended with Akk and Aye getting together, and it was the most thrilling moment to experience that time. But now, since they're already past that, AkkAye are in a relationship for quite a while now, and these two episodes were truly valuable in terms of how "romantic relationships are not always about rainbows and butterflies". It takes a freaking lot more to maintain and cherish the relationship you have with your partner, than to simply end it or start a new one. I think maintaining a relationship is the hardest thing of any kind of love, and this show portrayed it in such a simple yet beautiful way. Yes, sure - the birthday thing could be quite a common silly problem, but it is a very realistic one.

For someone like Akk, who underestimates himself and cares so much for others, and what others think of him - it was very likely of Akk to react that way. Deep down, he is excited about his birthday like anyone would, but meanwhile he doesn't want to bother anyone for him, especially Aye. He is not an expressive person, due to all the events that impacted him in Suppalo, but he has softened down and feels comfortable alot more than before. He doesn't say anything about his birthday, instead he expects Aye to remember it by himself, and not by Akk, which is normal. But on the other hand, Aye has other plans.

Aye is secretly planning a surprise for Akk's birthday, and everyone in his friend group is aware of that, except Akk. He was truly invested into carving that special song for him for the last few days, that Akk notices him paying less attention, while his birthday is approaching. So, Akk feels extra worse. On top of that, Aye acts completely oblivious to the birthday, he acts as if he completely forgot and has no idea of it's arrival. I understand Aye's perspective for keeping the surprise and gifting it to Akk like dropping a bomb, but he is so engrossed in that future part, the he is unseeing how much hurt Akk is going through right now. Aye, who believes Akk should stop caring about others too much, and think about himself - Aye wants Akk to talk about it, but also interrupts him simultaneously. Because he doesn't want the surprise to go all out beforehand.

There you have it. You cannot completely put the blame on either of them, and also you cannot give any credit as well. Because both of them are at fault. People aren't perfect, and that's what makes life so beautiful and flawed. While Aye is preparing beautiful things for Akk - Akk sulks, believing that Aye actually forgot his birthday. It's extremely common in real life, don't you think? Even if it sounds stupid, if that thing happened to me, I'd too question whether he forgot my birthday or not, or I'd similarly be too excited for the gift that I forgot how much pain I'm giving to the other. They assumed things, and created a gap of communication, which is understandable but also something to be repaired - every couple, every being needs time to rewind and reset. I think it was a dramatic and lovely presentation of how Akk and Aye are definitely the two sides of the same coin. They are different, they have different perspectives, different communication and love styles, but despite their differences, they balance each other out. That is why - Akk needs Aye, and Aye needs Akk.

2. Wasuwat's Short Film

Another important theme of these two episodes was definitely around Wat's short film and the new shooting scenes for them. I loved how the show portrayed Wat's new beginning in his career due to his love for Indie films. I believe dreams should be chased and followed, no matter what the consequences bring us. The entire process of Wat bringing his group of friends to the Theatre place, and those quirky fantasies in the minds of the Akk, Aye, Kan and Thua, were quite dramatic and also enjoyable. After that, the preparation of the script along with the research from both the duos, was meaningful. It's like the central messages of the show were combined beautifully - the message on perspectives along with Wat's dream. They merged both the things cleverly.

Another dialogue from Akk, which struck me hard - while Kan and Akk were assuring Wat for his big day of Short Film Competition, Akk said that it was enriching and fortunate enough that Wat has got to follow his dream. That dialogue struck me super hard. I was like, damn that's right. It doesn't matter whether the dream of us succeeds at the end, what matters is the satisfaction and peace that we've done, we've tried to go after that dream atleast once in our life. I believe so too. We must follow or atleast try to chase the dreams we have, no matter how impossible it seems. Trying something never hurt anybody. Apart from that, I loved that constant support Wat got from Teacher Sani and his friends - they played a massive role in Wat's life, and if it taught us something - it is how we should never discourage anyone for their dreams, no matter what it is. Later on, when Wat won the award, I was genuinely so emotional, like that boy deserved it. He also got exposure to his favourite director P'Nut, which is far more ecstatic. In short, Wat's film played a huge role when it came down to the message of following your dream, because you love it.

3. Genuine Friendships

Real Friendships are dead rare to find in life. Let's be honest, how many friends do you have who truly have the best interest for you? Having a real friend in life is like winning half tha battle. Friends and family are always responsible for carving out your beliefs, morals, values and who you'd be becoming in the future. The beautiful friendship of Akk, Kan and Wat is outstanding, and when Aye, Thua and Namo joins the squad, it just becomes more fun, exciting and stronger. When it comes to our oldest trio; Akk, Kan and Wat - I absolutely adore their friendship.

Have you seen how different Akk is from Kan, and Kan is from Wat? Everyone in the friend squad is different, possessing different interests and goals in life. Technically from an objective perspective, you'd see they are incompatible. But then, what makes their friendship so strong and deep? The answer is respect, love and understanding. Yes, Wat loves indie films, which Akk and Kan aren't interested in. But what they do is encourage, motivate and assure his friend of his talent, and worth, and pushes him forward to follow that dream. They cheer for him, write scripts for him, eventhough they can do other things.

Now, that's what I call a true friend. No two people are completely similar - even the most compatible friends have severe differences, but what makes friendships beautiful is acceptance. You accept and love the person the way they are, and strive to make them their best, by constantly supporting them and wishing good-intent. Having a group of these friends is like a biggest blessing they could ever find. Aye helped Thua with his family issues, even though he didn't even know him well that time. But he still chose to help him.

That's why I call a good intent. Aye and Thua writing the script together and subtly hinting Akk, but not talking behind his back - it is another strong point how these friends are genuine and real. All of them wish the best for another, and it is just so fulfilling to see. When Namo, who is not an actual member of the group, was upset about his dating life - did you see how Akk and Aye were concerned and went to check on him? I truly adored that scene. It portrayed how they care for Namo too, who is not that close to them like others, but seeing Akk care for him, really melted my heart. If true friendship isn't this, then I don't know what is.

4. AkkAye Night Pool Scene

You've no idea how much I adored and enjoyed every second of Akkaye's night pool scene. The moment was private, intimate and romantic, all at the same time. Eventhough they were still having a their silent fight, but the moment was just wonderful - maybe because it felt so realistic, sweet and vulnerable altogether. Firstly, the setting is outstanding - the quiet night, along with the faint tint of dim lights from the rooms far away, and the soothing water sounds from the pool. Every aspect created a sensual and lovely ambiance for our couple. It began with Aye asking Akk to play the guitar, which created another air of romance. But Akk was still upset with Aye, so I was glad that he atleast subtly confronted him. Eventhough Aye didn't give a satisfactory answer, since he wanted to hide the surprise but the way he handled Akk was extremely heartwarming.

He knows how Akk is warm for his kisses and love, and simply uses it to calm him down. The moment was ethereal and natural - when Akk was reaching his edge and was about to cry while venting out, Aye held him and kissed him. That was the moment, I became freaking soft. In no time, Akk melted again, and the kiss was beautiful to witness. The remaining moment when Akk slept on Aye's lap, and kept playing around by calling him friend - it was such a fun and playful moment, packed with three passionate kisses. I kept repeating that part, it was so charming, romantic and also sensual with twist of fun - I lived for that thing. I absolutely love how Aye handles Akk, it's just so perfect. The last part when they both hugged and slept right near the pool till the morning, was adorable. They were all jittery and nervous once they woke up, being so obvious to their friends. The entire pool scene was one of the best moments in thr entire show, for me.

5. Aye's Surprise Song for Akk

Before I say anything else, let me begin by how mesmerising and heartwarming the song is. One of the best Osts I've ever heard in Thai BL shows, for sure. It is soothing, enchanting and most importantly full of heartfelt lyrics and soothing melody. This song will make your day easily. Now, coming back to the scene - it was so painful to see Akk feeling devasted on how Aye forgot his birthday while being in the club with his friends. To add more salt to the wound, Nami mentioned that Aye maybe meeting someone else - which obviously Akk wouldn't believe, but the way his insecurities are increasing, this man felt the worse that ever. He was completely hopeless at this point. Exactly then, the stage lights turned up and we could hear the guitar strings. Believe me, the joy and hope on Akk's face was everything I was looking for. The way he was relieved and cried emotionally while listening to Aye's song for him; I truly wanted to give that boy my entire heart and hug him so tight.

That part made me an emotional mess. I loved how Akk got to sing his part as well, I love his voice so much - that beautiful duo song was everything that i wanted after so much doubt, pain and insecurity on Akk's side. Finally, my babyboys have made peace among themselves and my Akk baby is now all assured. What could make me happier than this? But something did. The tiny, sweet kisses that Akk kept pestering on Aye made me the weakest. Such a pure love with so much endearment. I don't even know what to say, after this scene - everything just kept getting better and better. How Akk and Aye shared their old rule of one punch and one kiss, along with accepting each other as one another's space - every single thing freaking made me crazy, happy and giddy. I love them so damn much, it hurts.

6. The Love-Making Scene

The way the story of AkkAye ended - I think it was the most perfect way that this show could've ended. I'm sure nobody else can manufacture a better ending for these two than this one. From their sensual shower scene to their hot passionate making out one - my eyes had a total delicious feast of meal, and I'm all up for it. It's true that the scene will typically be remembered for their intimate moment, but I'd like to point out the amount of vulnerability it presented, which made the love-making more meaningful and deep. The shower scene was domestic and had the aura of a warm, cozy and home-like vibe where a couple is simply having a blast just being around one another.

I adored when they were drying one another's hair, playing guitar and just having a wonderful time together before going to bed. It was so satisfying to witness. Later on, another best moment was when my baby Akk asked Aye to tell he loved him; I was incredibly soft that time. Akk is someone who has a hard time asking something, or wondering if he's a burden to other people, he put other's needs first.

For someone like him to open up and ask something for himself was an achievement, indeed. Aye teased him and tried to delay his answer to that, which made Akk insecure once again. But I'm glad that Aye responded him with his actions - I absolutely loved that slow deep kiss from Aye with a soft 'I love you'. It truly spoke millions - the kiss seemed like a strong promise with lots of emotions packed with it. That's why I felt goosebumps in that moment. I won't lie but my heart was skipping the entire time. Akk was being extra playful when he denied to say it back and the expression on both of their faces was just iconic.

I cannot stress enough how much died at their kisses and making-of scene at the end - my heart was weak, and wasn't coping up well with those passionate lip kisses, thigh grabs and the sizzling chemistry. I could feel the tension right through the screen and I'm not complaining at all. It was such a rollercoaster journey to watch AkkAye evolve from their Suppalo days into this - I feel so freaking proud of them.

7. The Kisses and the Locations

The Locations of the episodes were stunning and gorgeous? The kisses from Akkaye were steamy, sexy and delicious? I don't know what else should I add on. Like, have you noticed how seductively they both kept kissing and making out at every gorgeous location of the episode? From the first shot in the Brokeback Mountain, to the to another one in that Bicycling Location where they wore caps. Like, please get a grip you two - they kept doing passionate kisses for long moments at every beautiful scene, which constantly made my heart flutter. The scene where they were running and chasing one another at the flower field - I was so freaking soft the entire time, there was a lovely cheek kiss from Aye, but the rest of it was adorable, packed with pastel aesthetic and fluff moments.

Their smiling faces with so much happiness and love was all I needed for making my day. Even if we rule out the locations, the cinematography was on point. It was soothing, soft and absolutely ethereal witness. The club where Aye sang with Akk, or the Movie Theatre location where Wat won his award - all of the places and locations were worth watching the episodes. Especially, how can I not mention the trip place where they stayed in their rooms. The magnetic night time under the moonlight near the pool, I love everything about this show. I don't know what to say anymore, I'd probably peace out now.

I'd truly miss AkkAye with the bottom of my heart, until I witness SanRay again. The characters, the show, the deep raw emotions - everything that this series has brought to the table is a masterpiece and has set high standards for future bl shows. All I want to say is this show has given me enormous happiness and joy. I want to FirstKhao to keep getting versatile roles in many more series in the future; whether as a couple or individually. I just want my babies to shine brighter and keep getting ahead in life.

[russellsppttemplates]

since charles gf is friends with the boys since theyre young, how about a little something about her helping pierres gf when the woman feeling overwhelmed with their fame? like i imagine it can get crazy with paparazzi, all the money and the access, the travelling,the girls throwing themselves over them...nothing like us 9-5'vers are used to.

"We can go through here, it's usually calmer", you nudged Pierre's girlfriend while she walked along side you into the paddock, looking around at everything, "I don't usually see this way on TV", she mumbled, "photographers always stay on the other entrance, more famous people and all", you explained, thinking about the cuts you needed to take, "Fabiana from AlphaTauri taught me these paths for every race I went to when I first started dating Charles", you smiled at the memory, remembering how young (and lost) you were.

"Was it different because you were their friend before?", she asked you, "I didn't notice it at first, to be honest. But as we got older, everyone started guessing and wondering who I was, mean comments thrown as to why I was either at every race, because I surely had to have a job and why was I always in the paddock, or the other way around, why I wasn't here supporting them", you mused, "and I started taking these 'less famous' paths to the paddock", you explained, "it's not that the other ones aren't safe, but these are easier", you smiled as you reached the back entrance of Alpine, "Here".

.

"Hi, Y/N? How are you?", Pierre's girlfriend said over the phone while you cooked dinner with Charles' help, "Hello, dear, I've been good, and you? Pierre told me you'd join the race this weekend!", you replied, sensing some nerves on her tone but wanting to check if it was just your odd impression, "are you alone? I actually wanted to talk to you for a bit, if that's okay", she forwarded, making you ask her for a second.

Pausing the call, you looked at Charles, "can you handle the rest of the recipe, please?", you wondered, "just put these in halfway and then straight to the oven, right?", he pointed, making you peck his cheek before saying, "exactly. Merci, amour! Call me if you need anything", before leaving for your bedroom, wanting the call to be more private. "I'm back, sorry, just had to check Charles was capable of making the rest of our dinner", you giggled, "is everything okay?", you asked, "it, it seems so silly, but I don't know what to do, and it is consuming my kind day by day, and I don't want Pierre to be worried about this, he already has a lot on his plate and-", you decided to interrupt her, "hey, deep breaths, okay? Nothing is silly if it is bothering you. You can tell me if you want", you invited her to continue, "there has been a lot of comments online. Apparently people found my social media, and some managed to get hold of my posts because there are pictures from my Instagram page on the Internet and I have a private account, and it has spiralled so much, it's insane. They're talking about me like they know me, saying things that they take for granted and that are not the truth, and I'm not used to it. I thought I could call you to vent it out I guess, I know we can't do much about it", she admitted sadly, "unfortunately, this is part of what they do. But it is not because it is a part of what they do that you should accept it. And it's okay if it bothers you, it's only logical after all", you tried, "I wish I could say it gets better but I can only say there are days. And it's quite shit because you'll have to learn who you can trust and sometimes you do it the hard way, but in the end you're the one who knows about you and Pierre, so you just focus on that", you advised, "and don't ever think it is silly to call or talk about this. Either to me, to Pierre or to Charles. Even if my boyfriend is a little oblivious sometimes, we all care about you and want you to be well.".

.

Charles and Pierre had agreed to have dinner the day they arrived at the track location, wanting to spend some relaxed time before the busy race weekend. You were about to sit down when Pierre and his girlfriend arrived, making you drop your bag before greeting her with a kiss and a hug, "how are you? Charles is just there hanging my coat, go and give him yours too if you'd like", you offered before moving to hug her boyfriend and your long time friend, "Thank you for what you did with her. And what you do. I couldn't have asked for a better support", Pierre said as soon as he faced you, "I know she has been having a bit of a bad time dealing with things, and I know I sometimes don't have the best advice because I don't live this all thing like you do, it's different for us, but I'm very happy that she has you, too", he said before hugging you.

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