#'oh. alright. it actually makes a lot of sense why he's so harsh on a lot of new releases and we have a pretty strong overlap

[gothicprep]

i can't believe that people are just now coming to the realization that hasan piker has a hamster in a wheel where his brain should be.

like all of his content isn't "um uh ummmm well um uhhh *buzzword salad*. *screaming* *punching furniture* *30 minutes of gamer chair reaction footage*"

i swear to god, the only reason he gets away with half of this is because he's handsome. if you had someone who embodied the aesthetic of a basement-dwelling reddit supermod doing this, the whole operation would be a failure to launch.

[the-travelling-witch]

𝐆𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐁𝐨𝐲𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝: 𝐋𝐄𝐕𝐈𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐍

Character Choice: Leviathan x Fem! Reader

Stats: nsfw/ minors dni, jealous/ possessive! levi, cream pies, monster/tail fucking, mean dom! levi, levi with two cocks, degradation/ name calling, marking, double penetration, unprotected sex (stay safe everyone!), hint of/ alllusion to exhibitionism towards the end

Profile: It’s not fair! Why do his stupid brothers get to hog your attention all the time? He’ll make sure you’ll pay attention to him and only him. You’re not leaving his room for quite a while; there’s lots of fun stuff Levi wants to try with you. And when you do limp out of his room, his brothers will certainly get the message.

this is a repost because i'm moving my nsfw works onto this blog!!

obey me masterlist || sfw version

You had been playing video games with Levi for a while now, comfortably sitting in his lap with his chin resting on your head. And so far, everything had been super relaxed. That was until the credits rolled and Levi’s focus started to drift from the screen to you, inhaling the comforting scent of your hair products.

Just for the stench of his brothers to fill his nostrils, clinging to you just as stubbornly as the actual demons. It made him livid, imagining Asmo hanging off your arm, Satan holding you close as he read to you or Belphie using your lap as his personal napping spot. You should be spending time with him! 

Before he knew it, pure jealousy was coursing through his veins and his form shifted. Coral-like horns perched on his head like a crown as a scaled tail wrapped around your ankle, slowly winding upwards. His hands, which had held the controller up until now, gripped your hips tightly as he tried to control his breathing.

You’d felt Levi’s envy often enough through the pact linking you two together. Whether it was losing the bid on a figurine he wanted or seeing someone else with the character he tried to get, the feeling wasn’t new to you. But this time, the sensation was overwhelming, his pact mark on your body searing with his jealousy. Normally, you could console him easily enough but right now you weren’t so sure. 

“Levi? Levi are you alright? What’s wrong?” you questioned, one hand coming up to thread into his purple locks as you tried to shift so you could face him. Only to be stopped by his iron grip. You could, however, get a glimpse of his orange-flashing eyes, pupils merely slits. “Levi, I’m worried-”

“Oh, now you care?” His tone was cold and sent shivers down your spine, rare determination falling from every word. “What’s wrong, you ask? Maybe it’s the fact that you’re always so busy cosying up to all my brothers. Even that scumbag gets more of your attention than I do.”

Levi knew deep inside that wasn’t true. You always spent plenty of time with him. Then, Lucifer’s cologne tickled his nose and he lost all sense of rationality, thoughts only fueled by his sin. When he spoke again, his words were like pure venom dripping from his fangs. “Did you have fun? Letting them get their grimey hands all over you?”

“No, Levi, I-” You interrupted yourself with a sudden gasp as sharp teeth sank into the column of your neck, not deep enough to draw blood but enough to leave a nasty, very visible mark. Still, you couldn’t help but grind yourself back on him, feeling his prominent bulge against your ass. You almost drooled at the inhuman size of him, mind wandering to how good he’d stretch you open on that.

“Enjoying yourself?” He hissed while pressing you down harder, rubbing himself against your clothed pussy. Searching for something to ground yourself with, you reached back and dug your fingers into his hair as you rolled your head back to give Levi more access to your neck. “Look at you, you’re actually getting off to this. You’re so easy, no wonder demons like you so much.”

Much to your embarrassment, you could feel the arousal staining your panties at his harsh words. There was no use denying it, this side of your usually timid Levi was heavily turning you on, so much so that you could feel yourself pulsing against the straining material of his sweats. Somehow, that realisation just made you squirm against him more, searching desperately for any sort of friction.

It came in the form of his tail flicking forcefully against your core, not enough to seriously hurt you but definitely hard enough to mix pain with pleasure. Levi took advantage of your moan to tip your head back and shove his forked tongue down your throat. At the same time, his clawed hands roughly groped your breasts over your RAD dress shirt, certainly leaving red marks for you to find later. Apparently that wasn’t enough for the demon though, carelessly ripping the material apart and making buttons roll over the floor of his room.

Your bra was next. Although he didn’t destroy it, he merely pulled it down enough to where your breasts could spill over the cups, further driving home the point that this wasn’t about you. This was only for him and his pleasure.

As his fingers meanly pulled at your nipples, tweaking the little buds and rolling them between his digits, his tail had stopped prodding at your slit and instead slithered under the waistband of your bottoms. With it pressed against your body like that, it really had no option but to rub over your clit as it reached for your undergarments.

Just when you thought Levi would really have you ruin your clothes, he pushed them off your legs to give his tail free reign to work. As the appendage curled around the seat of your panties to pull them off as well, it grazed your folds and you lightly jerked in your demon’s hold. 

Said demon had gone back to biting and licking at your neck, his eyes following the string of arousal sticking to your underwear with rapt attention. The fact that he could reduce you to this state so easily was definitely an ego boost but he was nowhere near satiated with just this.

“I think it’s time I remind you who you really belong to,” he snarled, voice bitter as he could still smell them on you. “Once I’m done with you, nobody will ever forget it again.”

Without so much as a warning, Levi plunged the end of his tail into your soaked core, earning something between a shriek and a moan from you. The initial clamp down of your walls around his scales drew a shaky groan from him in return, squeezing your tits harder in his palms.

His tail was curling and uncurling inside of you in unreadable patterns as he stretched you out gradually. The texture of his cold scales was something you never grew used to as they scraped against your warm walls, the tip effortlessly hitting spots you never knew you had.

In record time, Levi had you writhing and squirming in his lap and he chose to make it worse by slipping one hand down your front to ruthlessly tap your pulsing clit. The noises you made drove him nearly insane with lust but he willed himself to patience, as far as that was still possible.

“That’s it, you’re gonna cum,” he all but ordered, fingers and tail pressing down on the same spot on opposite sides of your walls. “And your orgasm is gonna be all mine, you got that?”

“Yes, Levi,” you whined, eyes screwed shut and fingers tightening around his wrist and his purple locks.

“Then do it,” he spoke directly against your ear. 

You straightened in his hold as lightning shot up your spine, the thicker part of his tail keeping your legs nicely spread while he flicked his fingers harsher against your clit. 

Then, your bones turned to pudding as you weightlessly leaned back against Levi’s clothed chest, feeling your release leak around his tail. You tried to control your breathing with little success. A hand swept sweat matted hair out of your eyes while a second one ran up and down your side to provide a familiar comfort.

But soon, your world shifted as you fell forward, your fall only cushioned by a hand on your chest before your cheek met one of Levi’s many pillows, which had previously not laid there. Behind you, the demon rose to his knees as well, his thighs colliding with your ass. 

You whined as the movements of his tail started again, much slower than before though. He shushed you almost gently, yet when you pushed yourself up on weak arms to look back at him, one hand firmly pressed your upper back onto the floor again.

“Be good and behave.” Levi’s cold voice made you shiver in the best way possible and this time he could feel the way you clamped down on him at his command. “Seriously, I thought between us I was the perv but seeing you let me use you like this without any resistance makes me question that.”

There was rustling of clothes to be heard and you almost protested the withdrawal of his tail but the pressure of his pre cum leaking cocks against you shut you right up. No matter how often you two got frisky, you wondered every time how they were supposed to fit.

As much as Levi wanted to see you choke on his cock while attempting to wrap your hand around the other, he was far too impatient. He needed to stretch you open now.

Aligning the head of his upper dick, he heaved a sigh before pushing in. Just feeling your heat around the tip made him lightheaded but before he could get carried away, he remembered why you two were in this position in the first place. 

In one single thrust, the demon filled you to the brim, knocking all air from your lungs as you were shoved into the pillow. Despite having two members to work with, taking just one was still quite the challenge. It hurt but at the same time it felt so good.

With his demeanour that night, you thought he’d set a ruthless pace from the start but he surprised you with tempered and measured thrusts, aiming for depth rather than speed. Your shoulders tensed up when you felt his tail return, this time however circling your other hole.

“Levi-“ 

“Don’t tell me you don’t want this, I can feel that messy cunt of yours gripping me even tighter.” And he was right. Just the imagination of Levi using his tail, which was still coated in your previous release, to prepare you for what was inevitably to come had you bounce your hips back on him. “Yeah, that’s what I thought. You’re supposed to be my master, yet you’re acting more like a bitch in heat, already going dumb on my cock.”

Apparently now it was time for your bra to leave the scene completely as Levi fumbled with the clasp for a second before carelessly throwing it somewhere into his room. 

The fact that he was still fully clothed whereas you were completely nude made you feel excitingly exposed, fire burning through your body at the thought of Levi just having your way with you like this.

It should have been embarrassing how your pussy squelched with his cock inside, how fast you were approaching another orgasm, but with Levi leaning more of his weight onto you as he seemed to reach deeper in both your cunt and ass, you were more concerned with trying to sustain your lungs with enough air.

Well, it wasn’t like you had to tell him you were close anyway. The way it got harder to move in and out or the way your legs started trembling gave you away. With his cocks hitting your g-spot and clit on every forward motion as your walls were sandwiched on both sides between him, it was clear you’d reach your peak sooner rather than later.

Your high pitched moans echoed around the room and Levi’s guttoral groans soon joined as he starved off his own release to fuck you through yours. At this point, your vision turned hazy but you couldn’t help but want more. And more you should get.

Through the fog of your mind, you barely registered the moment of emptiness and Levi’s biting words were drowned out by your own heartbeat pulsing in your ears. What you did notice was the sensation of two cocks stuffing you to your limit, both heads throbbing with a desperate need to just stuff you full of his cum.

The view of you on your elbows and knees, back arched and fingers a death grip on his pillow rushed directly to his head and to his dicks. He was the one who had reduced to such a pathetically fucked out state, unable to speak any coherent sentences. Not his brothers.

“Do you just whore yourself out to everyone?” Sharp claws were dancing up your spine, the layer of sweat reflecting the blue light of his room. The thought of his brothers getting just a glimpse of you like this made his earlier rage flare up again.

“N-No,” you whimpered meekly.

“No? Just the demons you know?” His still clothed chest met your back as his hands held your hips in an iron grip, no doubt leaving bruises in their wake. His fangs were grazing your skin again, searching for a new spot to leave his mark on. “If Mammon were here, would you let him fuck this messy cunt of yours, hm? Would you gag on Belphie’s cock like a slut, yeah? Let him push your head down as he pleases?”

You didn’t answer this time, not that he really expected you to. Normally, Levi might have intertwined your fingers or pressed a sweet kiss to your temple. But not on this day. 

“C’mon, you can be louder than that, slut.” Purple coloured nails tangled in your hair and pulled your head up. “Let everyone in this house who’s fucking you this good.”

Nothing he had to tell you twice. You felt so full, every sensitive spot you could think of and all those you didn’t know you had were being abused over and over again. 

What had you screaming and scrambling for purchase was the pain of his fangs piercing the skin of your shoulder as his tail wrapped around your middle, the tip resting dangerously close to your sensitive clit after dragging through the slick mess staining your thighs.

“You’re close again, right?” That was when his tail started circling your pulsing nub and your eyes flew open as the knot in your stomach started pulling you into opposite directions once more. “That’s right, you're just a little toy for me to use, aren’t you? Just an obedient cocksleeve waiting to get stuffed.”

To emphasise his point, your expression was reflected back to you on one of his shiny consoles, eyes fluttering open and shut as your tongue lolled out and drool dripped from your lips, head still pulled back.

“Fuck, you look so good like this,” Levi cursed out of breath, cocks twitching against your walls as the slapping of skin picked up in speed. Letting your head fall forward again, both hands gripped your hips tightly, nails nicking your skin.

“I’m so close, please I can’t—“ You couldn’t decide if you were begging to cum or to rest.

Your demon made the choice for you. He drew quicker circles on your abused clit, pressing his scales down harsher, which had your toes curling and your hips trying to wind away from the assault. 

“Stop squirming!” Pulling your hips back to meet his strokes, you weren’t sure if Levi was trying to make you cum again or if he was just selfishly chasing his own release with all means possible. “I’m gonna fill you up and you’ll be a good human and not waste a drop. Once we’re done, you’ll only smell like me!”

Mindlessly nodding your head, you fell over the edge with a scream of his name, shuddering and jerking as his pace didn’t slow at all. Maybe it was because you were so out of it but you could swear you could feel his cocks swell before his hips stuttered and he painted your walls white with a throaty groan.

There was no chance you could ever keep all of his cum inside, no matter how deep he shot it. You were pretty sure no human could ever cum this much. 

For a few minutes there was nothing but panting to be heard before he finally pulled out, the bite marks on your shoulders pulsing as the adrenaline wore off. Levi stared as his cum leaked out of you and ran down your trembling thighs, collecting the drops with the tip of his tail before pushing them back into you. You moaned weakly at the clench of your overstimulated walls around the appendage but just as you were wondering whether you could handle another round, the chime of your phones echoed through Levi’s room.

Satan @ House of Lamentation (New): Dinner in 5, get down here

Just as you were about to push yourself up on shaky arms, Levi’s hand on your upper back kept your chest on the floor.

“What are you doing? We don’t have time, we need to get cleaned up,” you protested.

Without a word, Levi wrangled your ankles into your panties again and slid them back up your thighs. Snapping the waistband, he gave your clothed cunt a final slap and innerly gloated at the way your combined release was soaking the already ruined fabric.

With widened eyes, you looked back over your shoulder to see if he was serious only to find him staring at you with a fierce look in his eyes, daring you to challenge him.

“I told you, I’ll make sure everyone knows who you belong to.”

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if you like my content, reblogs, comments and asks are always much appreciated ♡

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[the-travelling-bitch]

𝐆𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐁𝐨𝐲𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝: 𝐋𝐄𝐕𝐈𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐍

Character Choice: Leviathan x Fem! Reader

Stats: jealous/ possessive! levi, cream pies, monster/tail fucking, mean dom! levi, levi with two cocks, degradation/ name calling, marking, double penetration, unprotected sex (stay safe everyone!), hint of/ alllusion to exhibitionism towards the end

Profile: It’s not fair! Why do his stupid brothers get to hog your attention all the time? He’ll make sure you’ll pay attention to him and only him. You’re not leaving his room for quite a while; there’s lots of fun stuff Levi wants to try with you. And when you do limp out of his room, his brothers will certainly get the message.

[sfw version]

You had been playing video games with Levi for a while now, comfortably sitting in his lap with his chin resting on your head. And so far, everything had been super relaxed. That was until the credits rolled and Levi’s focus started to drift from the screen to you, inhaling the comforting scent of your hair products.

Just for the stench of his brothers to fill his nostrils, clinging to you just as stubbornly as the actual demons. It made him livid, imagining Asmo hanging off your arm, Satan holding you close as he read to you or Belphie using your lap as his personal napping spot. You should be spending time with him! 

Before he knew it, pure jealousy was coursing through his veins and his form shifted. Coral-like horns perched on his head like a crown as a scaled tail wrapped around your ankle, slowly winding upwards. His hands, which had held the controller up until now, gripped your hips tightly as he tried to control his breathing.

You’d felt Levi’s envy often enough through the pact linking you two together. Whether it was losing the bid on a figurine he wanted or seeing someone else with the character he tried to get, the feeling wasn’t new to you. But this time, the sensation was overwhelming, his pact mark on your body searing with his jealousy. Normally, you could console him easily enough but right now you weren’t so sure. 

“Levi? Levi are you alright? What’s wrong?” you questioned, one hand coming up to thread into his purple locks as you tried to shift so you could face him. Only to be stopped by his iron grip. You could, however, get a glimpse of his orange-flashing eyes, pupils merely slits. “Levi, I’m worried-”

“Oh, now you care?” His tone was cold and sent shivers down your spine, rare determination falling from every word. “What’s wrong, you ask? Maybe it’s the fact that you’re always so busy cosying up to all my brothers. Even that scumbag gets more of your attention than I do.”

Levi knew deep inside that wasn’t true. You always spent plenty of time with him. Then, Lucifer’s cologne tickled his nose and he lost all sense of rationality, thoughts only fueled by his sin. When he spoke again, his words were like pure venom dripping from his fangs. “Did you have fun? Letting them get their grimey hands all over you?”

“No, Levi, I-” You interrupted yourself with a sudden gasp as sharp teeth sank into the column of your neck, not deep enough to draw blood but enough to leave a nasty, very visible mark. Still, you couldn’t help but grind yourself back on him, feeling his prominent bulge against your ass. You almost drooled at the inhuman size of him, mind wandering to how good he’d stretch you open on that.

“Enjoying yourself?” He hissed while pressing you down harder, rubbing himself against your clothed pussy. Searching for something to ground yourself with, you reached back and dug your fingers into his hair as you rolled your head back to give Levi more access to your neck. “Look at you, you’re actually getting off to this. You’re so easy, no wonder demons like you so much.”

Much to your embarrassment, you could feel the arousal staining your panties at his harsh words. There was no use denying it, this side of your usually timid Levi was heavily turning you on, so much so that you could feel yourself pulsing against the straining material of his sweats. Somehow, that realisation just made you squirm against him more, searching desperately for any sort of friction.

It came in the form of his tail flicking forcefully against your core, not enough to seriously hurt you but definitely hard enough to mix pain with pleasure. Levi took advantage of your moan to tip your head back and shove his forked tongue down your throat. At the same time, his clawed hands roughly groped your breasts over your RAD dress shirt, certainly leaving red marks for you to find later. Apparently that wasn’t enough for the demon though, carelessly ripping the material apart and making buttons roll over the floor of his room.

Your bra was next. Although he didn’t destroy it, he merely pulled it down enough to where your breasts could spill over the cups, further driving home the point that this wasn’t about you. This was only for him and his pleasure.

As his fingers meanly pulled at your nipples, tweaking the little buds and rolling them between his digits, his tail had stopped prodding at your slit and instead slithered under the waistband of your bottoms. With it pressed against your body like that, it really had no option but to rub over your clit as it reached for your undergarments.

Just when you thought Levi would really have you ruin your clothes, he pushed them off your legs to give his tail free reign to work. As the appendage curled around the seat of your panties to pull them off as well, it grazed your folds and you lightly jerked in your demon’s hold. 

Said demon had gone back to biting and licking at your neck, his eyes following the string of arousal sticking to your underwear with rapt attention. The fact that he could reduce you to this state so easily was definitely an ego boost but he was nowhere near satiated with just this.

“I think it’s time I remind you who you really belong to,” he snarled, voice bitter as he could still smell them on you. “Once I’m done with you, nobody will ever forget it again.”

Without so much as a warning, Levi plunged the end of his tail into your soaked core, earning something between a shriek and a moan from you. The initial clamp down of your walls around his scales drew a shaky groan from him in return, squeezing your tits harder in his palms.

His tail was curling and uncurling inside of you in unreadable patterns as he stretched you out gradually. The texture of his cold scales was something you never grew used to as they scraped against your warm walls, the tip effortlessly hitting spots you never knew you had.

In record time, Levi had you writhing and squirming in his lap and he chose to make it worse by slipping one hand down your front to ruthlessly tap your pulsing clit. The noises you made drove him nearly insane with lust but he willed himself to patience, as far as that was still possible.

“That’s it, you’re gonna cum,” he all but ordered, fingers and tail pressing down on the same spot on opposite sides of your walls. “And your orgasm is gonna be all mine, you got that?”

“Yes, Levi,” you whined, eyes screwed shut and fingers tightening around his wrist and his purple locks.

“Then do it,” he spoke directly against your ear. 

You straightened in his hold as lightning shot up your spine, the thicker part of his tail keeping your legs nicely spread while he flicked his fingers harsher against your clit. 

Then, your bones turned to pudding as you weightlessly leaned back against Levi’s clothed chest, feeling your release leak around his tail. You tried to control your breathing with little success. A hand swept sweat matted hair out of your eyes while a second one ran up and down your side to provide a familiar comfort.

But soon, your world shifted as you fell forward, your fall only cushioned by a hand on your chest before your cheek met one of Levi’s many pillows, which had previously not laid there. Behind you, the demon rose to his knees as well, his thighs colliding with your ass. 

You whined as the movements of his tail started again, much slower than before though. He shushed you almost gently, yet when you pushed yourself up on weak arms to look back at him, one hand firmly pressed your upper back onto the floor again.

“Be good and behave.” Levi’s cold voice made you shiver in the best way possible and this time he could feel the way you clamped down on him at his command. “Seriously, I thought between us I was the perv but seeing you let me use you like this without any resistance makes me question that.”

There was rustling of clothes to be heard and you almost protested the withdrawal of his tail but the pressure of his pre cum leaking cocks against you shut you right up. No matter how often you two got frisky, you wondered every time how they were supposed to fit.

As much as Levi wanted to see you choke on his cock while attempting to wrap your hand around the other, he was far too impatient. He needed to stretch you open now.

Aligning the head of his upper dick, he heaved a sigh before pushing in. Just feeling your heat around the tip made him lightheaded but before he could get carried away, he remembered why you two were in this position in the first place. 

In one single thrust, the demon filled you to the brim, knocking all air from your lungs as you were shoved into the pillow. Despite having two members to work with, taking just one was still quite the challenge. It hurt but at the same time it felt so good.

With his demeanour that night, you thought he’d set a ruthless pace from the start but he surprised you with tempered and measured thrusts, aiming for depth rather than speed. Your shoulders tensed up when you felt his tail return, this time however circling your other hole.

“Levi-“ 

“Don’t tell me you don’t want this, I can feel that messy cunt of yours gripping me even tighter.” And he was right. Just the imagination of Levi using his tail, which was still coated in your previous release, to prepare you for what was inevitably to come had you bounce your hips back on him. “Yeah, that’s what I thought. You’re supposed to be my master, yet you’re acting more like a bitch in heat, already going dumb on my cock.”

Apparently now it was time for your bra to leave the scene completely as Levi fumbled with the clasp for a second before carelessly throwing it somewhere into his room. 

The fact that he was still fully clothed whereas you were completely nude made you feel excitingly exposed, fire burning through your body at the thought of Levi just having your way with you like this.

It should have been embarrassing how your pussy squelched with his cock inside, how fast you were approaching another orgasm, but with Levi leaning more of his weight onto you as he seemed to reach deeper in both your cunt and ass, you were more concerned with trying to sustain your lungs with enough air.

Well, it wasn’t like you had to tell him you were close anyway. The way it got harder to move in and out or the way your legs started trembling gave you away. With his cocks hitting your g-spot and clit on every forward motion as your walls were sandwiched on both sides between him, it was clear you’d reach your peak sooner rather than later.

Your high pitched moans echoed around the room and Levi’s guttoral groans soon joined as he starved off his own release to fuck you through yours. At this point, your vision turned hazy but you couldn’t help but want more. And more you should get.

Through the fog of your mind, you barely registered the moment of emptiness and Levi’s biting words were drowned out by your own heartbeat pulsing in your ears. What you did notice was the sensation of two cocks stuffing you to your limit, both heads throbbing with a desperate need to just stuff you full of his cum.

The view of you on your elbows and knees, back arched and fingers a death grip on his pillow rushed directly to his head and to his dicks. He was the one who had reduced to such a pathetically fucked out state, unable to speak any coherent sentences. Not his brothers.

“Do you just whore yourself out to everyone?” Sharp claws were dancing up your spine, the layer of sweat reflecting the blue light of his room. The thought of his brothers getting just a glimpse of you like this made his earlier rage flare up again.

“N-No,” you whimpered meekly.

“No? Just the demons you know?” His still clothed chest met your back as his hands held your hips in an iron grip, no doubt leaving bruises in their wake. His fangs were grazing your skin again, searching for a new spot to leave his mark on. “If Mammon were here, would you let him fuck this messy cunt of yours, hm? Would you gag on Belphie’s cock like a slut, yeah? Let him push your head down as he pleases?”

You didn’t answer this time, not that he really expected you to. Normally, Levi might have intertwined your fingers or pressed a sweet kiss to your temple. But not on this day. 

“C’mon, you can be louder than that, slut.” Purple coloured nails tangled in your hair and pulled your head up. “Let everyone in this house who’s fucking you this good.”

Nothing he had to tell you twice. You felt so full, every sensitive spot you could think of and all those you didn’t know you had were being abused over and over again. 

What had you screaming and scrambling for purchase was the pain of his fangs piercing the skin of your shoulder as his tail wrapped around your middle, the tip resting dangerously close to your sensitive clit after dragging through the slick mess staining your thighs.

“You’re close again, right?” That was when his tail started circling your pulsing nub and your eyes flew open as the knot in your stomach started pulling you into opposite directions once more. “That’s right, you're just a little toy for me to use, aren’t you? Just an obedient cocksleeve waiting to get stuffed.”

To emphasise his point, your expression was reflected back to you on one of his shiny consoles, eyes fluttering open and shut as your tongue lolled out and drool dripped from your lips, head still pulled back.

“Fuck, you look so good like this,” Levi cursed out of breath, cocks twitching against your walls as the slapping of skin picked up in speed. Letting your head fall forward again, both hands gripped your hips tightly, nails nicking your skin.

“I’m so close, please I can’t—“ You couldn’t decide if you were begging to cum or to rest.

Your demon made the choice for you. He drew quicker circles on your abused clit, pressing his scales down harsher, which had your toes curling and your hips trying to wind away from the assault. 

“Stop squirming!” Pulling your hips back to meet his strokes, you weren’t sure if Levi was trying to make you cum again or if he was just selfishly chasing his own release with all means possible. “I’m gonna fill you up and you’ll be a good human and not waste a drop. Once we’re done, you’ll only smell like me!”

Mindlessly nodding your head, you fell over the edge with a scream of his name, shuddering and jerking as his pace didn’t slow at all. Maybe it was because you were so out of it but you could swear you could feel his cocks swell before his hips stuttered and he painted your walls white with a throaty groan.

There was no chance you could ever keep all of his cum inside, no matter how deep he shot it. You were pretty sure no human could ever cum this much. 

For a few minutes there was nothing but panting to be heard before he finally pulled out, the bite marks on your shoulders pulsing as the adrenaline wore off. Levi stared as his cum leaked out of you and ran down your trembling thighs, collecting the drops with the tip of his tail before pushing them back into you. You moaned weakly at the clench of your overstimulated walls around the appendage but just as you were wondering whether you could handle another round, the chime of your phones echoed through Levi’s room.

Satan @ House of Lamentation (New): Dinner in 5, get down here

Just as you were about to push yourself up on shaky arms, Levi’s hand on your upper back kept your chest on the floor.

“What are you doing? We don’t have time, we need to get cleaned up,” you protested.

Without a word, Levi wrangled your ankles into your panties again and slid them back up your thighs. Snapping the waistband, he gave your clothed cunt a final slap and innerly gloated at the way your combined release was soaking the already ruined fabric.

With widened eyes, you looked back over your shoulder to see if he was serious only to find him staring at you with a fierce look in his eyes, daring you to challenge him.

“I told you, I’ll make sure everyone knows who you belong to.”

if you want to be added to my tag list, send in an ask ♡

[harunayuuka2060]

Azul: You're asking me... how to approach MC?

Vil: Yes.

Azul: ...

Azul: Did they not approach you yet?

Vil: What do you think? *his arms crossed*

Azul: ... *adjusts his glasses* *smiles awkwardly* I don't know. MC is quite a friendly fellow. In fact, I've just known today that they've become friends with Idia.

Vil: What? Idia? That introvert?

Azul: Yes. That's why your question made me confused.

Vil: ...

Vil: *breathes in* I assume you're also friends with them.

Azul: Yes. Not just friends, but business partners. *smiles proudly*

Vil: ...

Vil: Azul, I'm here to ask you. Why is this HASN'T come to me yet?

Azul: I wish I have the answer to that.

Vil: ...

MC: *having a joyous conversation with the Scarabia students*

MC: I would love to visit Scalding Sands in my vacation!

Kalim: You should! Right, Jamil? We can give you a tour!

Jamil: Sure. But you have to bring some sunscreen with you because the sun is pretty harsh there.

Vil: *frowning*

Rook: Are you alright, Vil?

Vil: *sigh* ...

Vil: Rook, is it possible for you to call MC to come to our table?

Rook: Huh? Why all of a sudden?

Vil: Just do it. Please.

Epel: Oh! I'll do it! I have something to return to them! *stands up and approaches MC to the table of the Scarabia students*

Rook: ...

Rook: Vil, be honest. What is it about?

Vil: ...

MC: Huh? Why are you giving this back?

Epel: I don't think I have any use of it. And I'm afraid that I might drop it somewhere.

MC: Hmm... You're right. But you need something useful, huh...

Epel: I'm sorry I couldn't keep it.

MC: Oh, it's okay. I have something better for you.*unclasps the choker they're wearing*

MC: Would you mind getting closer? I'll put this on you.

Epel: S-Sure.

MC: There.

Kalim: Wow, Epel! It looks good on you!

Epel: R-Really? But what does it do?

Jamil: ...

Jamil: Wait. Isn't that a special technomancy item? The one where it can change your appearance?

MC: That's right. You know a lot, Jamil.

Jamil: *smiles* Not really.

Epel: A-And you're giving this to me?!

MC: Of course. What's good about that item is that it only requires a small amount of magic and the disguise can lasts for 30 minutes. Why not give it a try?

Epel: ... I want to look like a grown adult.

MC: Then do it. *chuckles*

Epel: *has turned into a very handsome man* IT WORKS!!!!

Vil: *clears throat*

Epel: Oops.

Epel: I-I'm actually here to ask you to go to our—

*the bell rings*

MC: Oh. I think the lunch break is over.

Epel: Aww...

MC: Catch you later, Epel.

Kamil: Yeah. See you, Epel!

Epel: *watches them leave*

Epel: *turns to look at Vil*

Vil: *isn't happy about it*

Vil: *decides to visit Ramshackle himself after learning from Rook that MC stays there to rehearse every afternoon*

Vil: *about to knock on the door when he remembers Rook's advice*

Rook: Fleur tordue doesn't like getting bothered when they're on rehearsal. So knocking the door is a big no-no.

Vil: That doesn't make sense, Rook. *sigh* *then just opens the door* *notices that it's a bit dark inside* *walks in* *closes the door behind him*

Vil: ...

Vil: *continues to walk in light steps until he reaches the living room*

*it's much brighter compared to the entrance because of the lit candles on the floor*

Vil: What's this? A ceremony for a cult?

Vil: *doesn't see MC so he goes to check the other rooms*

Vil: *has been looking around but doesn't see them*

Vil: *sigh* Should I just go another day? *turns around and about to leave when—*

MC: *standing close behind him, holding him by the throat* *their hand planted firmly*

MC: You have a beautiful neck.

Vil: ...

Vil: Thank you.

MC: ...

MC: *laughs* "Thank you"? Hm. I like that. *releasing their hold*

Vil: *turns to face them*

MC: *is covered in fake blood stains*

MC: But I was expecting that you would throw me off.

Vil: I better not do that and injure a famous celebrity.

MC: You could say that it was just an accident. *chuckles* But really, I would've preferred it if you did that. It would help me a lot in my rehearsal. *smiles*

Vil: ...

Vil: *in his head* You're weird.

[aishangotome]

Minamoto No Yoritomo: Chapter 1

(Gathering my magical power, I'll break the bond with Tamamo... and definitely open my own pharmacy!)

Thinking of the ordinary and lovable daily life, Yoshino encouraged herself and looked straight ahead.

Yoshino: Nice to meet you! Everyone.

Yoritomo: Alright. Good determination.

Yoritomo's eyes shone brightly, gathering the moonlight.

Yoritomo: Of course, what happened today must be kept secret. If you have any problems living in the Imperial Palace, tell these guys here.

Tamamo: I'd like you to introduce us again. I already know your name, but you were quite busy earlier.

Yoritomo: Alright. You too, remember it well, Yoshino.

Yoshino: Y-Yes.

Yoritomo: This tall guy with droopy eyes is my vassal and the muscle of the Kamakura shogunate, Morinaga Adachi.

Yoshino: ...Muscle?

Morinaga: That expression is a bit confusing, but... I actually go out to battle and command soldiers a lot.

(His demeanor is gentle, but what he does feels like a warrior.)

Yoritomo: Next, also a vassal. The glasses guy, Kagetoki Kajiwara.

Kagetoki: As Yoritomo-sama's vassal, I mainly handle domestic affairs and the management of vassals.

Kagetoki: It is also my duty to eliminate incompetent people from the shogunate. Be careful.

(Just as he looks, he seems a little scary...)

(...But, he was called the glasses guy, so that's okay.)

Yoritomo: Finally, this is Shigehira Taira, who I'm allied with. His role is...

Shigehira: The common sense guy!

Shigehira bit back before Yoritomo-sama could continue.

Shigehira: Listening to this, couldn't you introduce me a little better?

(His face is so well-proportioned that it's hard to approach, but seeing him talk, he's quite emotional.)

(Hm? Come to think of it, 'Taira'...)

Yoshino: Shigehira-san, are you from the Taira clan?

Shigehira: What, is that bad?

Yoshino: N-No, it's not bad, but...

Flustered by his grumpy reply, Yoshino glanced between Yoritomo-sama and Shigehira-san.

(The Genji and Taira clans were supposed to be opposed to each other, right?)

Even I, who am not well-versed in politics, know that Yoritomo-sama, the leader of the Genji clan, defeated the Taira clan in battle.

Shigehira: Right now, I'm just under Yoritomo-sama's umbrella. I don't have any obligation to explain more than that, right?

Yoshino: I understand...

(There seems to be some circumstances, but it seems like he doesn't want me to pry.)

Yoritomo: And I am the shogun, Minamoto no Yoritomo. Well, I don't need to explain, do I?

Morinaga: Yoritomo-sama is the black-hearted one, isn't he?

(Morinaga-san also says quite a lot with a smile...)

Yoritomo: Don't praise me. I'll get embarrassed.

Yoritomo-sama brushed off Morinaga-san's words without looking angry.

Yoritomo: That's all for the introductions. For today, I'll show you to your rooms.

Yoritomo: Tomorrow, we'll talk about the future. Alright? Yoshino, Tamamo.

(He speaks like someone used to giving orders.)

(Thinking about it again... I was meeting with an incredibly important person.)

Yoshino: Yes...! Thank you for the room.

Now that the crisis has passed, I'm not sure how to act towards Yoritomo-sama.

Tamamo: I can't wait for the feeling of a futon after a long time. Have them prepare a comfortable one.

Tamamo: Also, for breakfast, I want grilled fish and inari sushi.

Yoshino: Hey, Tamamo!

(As expected of a yokai...! Unlike me, he has no hesitation.)

Tamamo is calm despite my panic.

Yoritomo: You're a more brazen beast than I thought.

Kagetoki: Why not just let him sleep in the grass?

Kagetoki: If he has his own fur, that should be enough for a futon.

(Harsh... Kagetoki-san and Tamamo don't seem to get along.)

Tamamo: Kagetoki. You're often called a sneaky glasses guy, aren't you?

Yoshino: Sneaky glasses guy!?

(That was an amazing insult!)

Kagetoki: Unfortunately, tonight is the first time I've had the experience of being called that.

Kagetoki: But I wouldn't mind sewing your mouth shut and making it the last.

(Oh no, Kagetoki-san isn't backing down either...!)

As I watched nervously, Morinaga-san burst out laughing.

Morinaga: Tamamo... You're funny. You're great.

Kagetoki: You're laughing too much, fluffy muscle man.

Shigehira: Hey. Seriously, stop this pointless bickering.

(Huh? But...)

Yoshino: Shigehira-san's shoulders are trembling a little too...

Shigehira: ...It's your imagination! Your eyes are playing tricks on you.

Clearing his throat, Shigehira-san flatly denied it.

(Is that so...? I feel like he was trying to hold back laughter.)

Shigehira: More importantly, I want to go home now.

Yoritomo: Well, it's time for the kid to go to bed. Kagetoki, put Shigehira to bed.

Shigehira: Who's a kid, who is!

Morinaga: Don't get mad, Shigehira. If you sleep early, you'll grow taller.

Morinaga-san patted Shigehira-san's head.

Shigehira: S-Stop it! Just because you're a little tall...

Shigehira: In general, it's not very convincing coming from someone who stays up late gambling.

Morinaga: You're so young, Shigehira. I grow my body through sleep and my brain through gambling.

Shigehira: ...Liar!

(I can't tell if these people get along or not.)

Wondering, I coughed softly.

Yoshino: Just listening to the conversation, it's hard to believe it's between the shogun and his close aides.

Morinaga: You'll get used to it soon.

Yoshino: I hope so...

(They seem to be quite unique individuals. Not all samurai are like this, are they?)

Kagetoki: Now... It's true that I'd like to rest soon. We've been moving around unnecessarily tonight.

Morinaga: That's right. ...Well then, good night, Yoritomo-sama.

Yoritomo: Ah. See you tomorrow.

Kagetoki-san and the other two bowed their heads slightly to Yoritomo-sama.

Yoshino: You all don't live in the Imperial Palace?

Kagetoki: Of course not. Since you don't seem to understand, let me tell you...

Kagetoki: You should remember that it's a special thing for you to live in the Imperial Palace.

Yoshino: Is that so...?

Yoshino: Oh no, I'm getting even more nervous.

(I'm already unsure how to behave...)

Yoritomo: There's no need to be reserved.

As he said this in an arrogant voice, he casually pulled my arm...

(Ah...)

Yoritomo: After all, I intend for you to be 'especially' useful.

I was involuntarily captivated by his sharp eyes that were so close.

(What a forceful person... Even if he is the shogun...)

I try to maintain my composure and search for words to respond.

--CHOICES--

I'll do my best...

I'm dreading it

Yoritomo-sama, please

----------------

Yoshino: Y-Yoritomo-sama... Please don't forget your promise to protect me and Tamamo.

Yoritomo: Excellent. The stronger your spirit, the more fun it is to tame you.

Yoritomo-sama laughed loudly and suddenly released me.

Yoritomo: Come. I'll gladly welcome you to this Imperial Palace.

Yoshino: Thank you...

(Sigh... If I'm this flustered now, will I be okay in the future?)

After greeting the other three, I followed Yoritomo-sama through the heavy gate.

My heart began to pound with the anticipation of the turbulent days to come.

(If I had known before coming to Kamakura that I would be living in the same building as the shogun, what would I have thought?)

(Yeah... I probably wouldn't have believed it.)

That day, I slept soundly in the room I was given... Perhaps because I was tired, I didn't have any dreams.

-

The next morning--

I was summoned along with Tamamo and visited Yoritomo-sama's room.

Next to Yoritomo-sama, Kagetoki-san was standing by, his glasses glinting coldly.

Yoshino: ...Yoritomo-sama, what did you say just now?

Yoritomo: I said, I'm appointing you as my personal attendant.

Yoritomo: From now on, when I leave the Imperial Palace for official duties, you'll accompany me.

(You're joking, right!?)

(Being an attendant means taking care of personal needs, right?)

While I'm confused, Tamamo laughs cheerfully next to me.

Tamamo: Oh, am I an attendant too, Yoritomo?

Kagetoki: You stand out too much. Besides, you have no intention of listening to anyone anyway.

Tamamo: You're quick to figure out my personality in one night, Kagetoki.

Kagetoki: Don't make careless remarks when you had no intention of hiding it in the first place.

Yoritomo: Tamamo is considered my guest. You can do as you please, but don't cause any trouble, okay?

Tamamo: I can't promise that.

(Certainly, if Tamamo pretended to be an attendant, it would be strange no matter how you look at it...)

Yoshino: Wait a minute! I'm just a pharmacist, you know?

I raise my voice as much as I can and try to protest.

Kagetoki: It can't be helped. We need to strengthen Yoritomo-sama's personal protection in preparation for Yoshitsune's attack.

Kagetoki: Military force can be suppressed with military force, but magic power cannot be prevented.

Tamamo: I see, so that's why Yoshino is needed.

(Needed...)

Yoshino: So, being an attendant is just a name, and in reality, I'm a bodyguard?

Yoritomo: That's right.

Yoritomo: Tamamo, can she still use your ability to steal magic power even if Yoshino is away from you?

Tamamo: Yes. There's no problem.

Yoritomo: Good.

Yoritomo: Yoshino, you're lucky. You can gain valuable experience.

(Not good at all!)

Yoshino: I don't know any etiquette, and it's absolutely impossible for me to be an attendant to someone as important as the shogun.

Yoritomo: You don't need to do anything. Just walk behind me and sit next to me.

Yoritomo: It's a simple job that even a monkey could do. Or are you less than a monkey?

Yoshino: Less than a monkey!?

(What a way to put it...)

Just as I was about to retort, the sliding door slid open.

Morinaga: Yoritomo-sama, it's almost time for you to go out. ...Oh.

Morinaga: Yoshino, Tamamo, good morning.

Yoshino: Ah, good morning, Morinaga-san.

I was given a refreshing smile that blew away the tense atmosphere, and I returned the greeting.

Yoritomo: You came at just the right time, Morinaga.

Yoritomo: Carry this woman outside. I intend to take her with me, but she's not very obedient.

Morinaga: Oh...

(Morinaga-san...?)

Yoshino: I believe you're a good person, Morinaga-san!

Tilting his head, Morinaga-san put his hands together apologetically.

Morinaga: I'm sorry, Yoshino. I'll buy you your favorite sweets at the market next time.

Yoshino: It's not a matter of sweets... Wah!?

Before I knew it, he quickly approached and lifted me up effortlessly, causing my vision to shake.

(So high!)

Yoshino: Put me down...

Morinaga: Don't struggle, don't struggle. It's only scary at first.

Yoshino: I'm even more scared now!

Yoritomo: Let's hurry. If we're late, it'll mess up the rest of the schedule.

Kagetoki: Have a safe trip, Yoritomo-sama.

Tamamo: Yoshino, I'm counting on you for souvenirs.

Yoshino: How can you say such carefree things!?

(What about my will!?)

I protested as much as I could while being carried like luggage, but...

-

(This is what it's come to.)

After crossing the border on horseback for a while, we transferred to an oxcart that had come to pick us up.

(This is the first time I've ridden in an oxcart... but)

I don't seem to have the luxury of enjoying it right now.

Yoritomo: Hey, how long are you going to keep pouting? You're troublesome.

Yoshino: I'm not pouting, I'm nervous.

I retorted while feeling the rattling vibrations under my butt.

Yoritomo-sama, sitting across from me, had a look on his face that said he didn't care at all.

Yoritomo: Oh, is that so?

(Since I'm going through this because of Yoritomo-sama, he could at least be a little more sympathetic.)

(He probably thinks it's natural for a commoner like me to obey him.)

I took a small breath to try to regain my composure.

Yoshino: By the way, where is this oxcart headed?

Yoritomo: It's one of the countries under my umbrella. I've been invited to a banquet.

Yoshino: A banquet? Is that official business?

I blinked in surprise at his answer.

Yoritomo: What? You have a problem with that?

Yoshino: No... It's just that, since you're going out of your way to travel far when you might be targeted...

Yoshino: I thought it must be a very important job...

Yoritomo: Well, that's too bad for you.

I stared at Yoritomo-sama, who shrugged his shoulders, in disbelief.

(I did say I would cooperate with the Kamakura shogunate, but I never thought I would be dragged to a banquet.)

Yoritomo: You're a stubborn woman. Just give it up already.

I was showered with amused laughter, and I couldn't help but purse my lips...

Yoritomo: Ha, you have such an easy-to-read face.

(Huh?)

Yoritomo-sama leaned forward with a mischievous smile.

Creak... the wooden floor creaked faintly.

Yoshino: Y-Yoritomo-sama?

(So close.)

I involuntarily stepped back and my back hit the wall.

Yoritomo: Where are you trying to escape to?

Yoshino: Ah...

Yoritomo-sama's hand rested on the wall, cutting off my escape route.

Yoshino: What are you doing...?

Yoritomo: Who knows?

Yoritomo: How should I make a woman who's not interested in my orders obey me, I wonder?

(What does that mean...?)

His sweet, poisonous voice gradually seeped into my ears.

Yoritomo-sama looked down at me, who was holding my breath slightly, with amusement.

Yoshino: Make me obey... I'm troubled by you saying such selfish things!

Yoritomo: Selfish things, huh? Let me tell you, my intentions are the shogunate's decisions.

Yoshino: That's...

Yoritomo: Give up, there are fates you can't escape. After all, sacrifices are necessary for the greater good.

Yoritomo: Your feelings and the shogunate's decision. It's obvious which one I'll choose, isn't it?

Yoritomo: If you say you don't understand... I'll teach your body. From now on, thoroughly.

(Ah...)

My heartbeat quickened, unable to stop the slight fever stirred up by his words and gaze.

As I lost my words, the oxcart shook suddenly.

(Whoa!)

Yoritomo: Have we arrived?

Strong arms easily caught my shoulders as I stumbled.

Yoritomo: Too bad, huh? I'll continue this later.

Yoritomo-sama stood up, screwing his smiling gaze into my eyes once more.

(I was completely teased...!)

Yoshino: Stop it already. Do you enjoy teasing people?

Yoritomo: It's quite fun to see you get so worked up.

(This person really has a terrible personality.)

I thought angrily as I also stood up.

Following Yoritomo-sama, I got off the oxcart and...

-

(What is this...!)

A large crowd of people lined up on both sides of the road, bowing their heads towards us.

The samurai at the front stared at Yoritomo-sama with a tense expression.

Samurai: Yoritomo-sama, welcome.

Yoritomo: It's been a while. I'm glad to see you're well.

(Ah... His attitude is already different.)

His face, pasted with a perfect smile, looks like a completely different person from a while ago.

Samurai: I'm honored. We have prepared a seat for you to rest from your long journey. Please, this way.

Yoritomo: Thank you. I'm looking forward to it.

Yoritomo-sama walked proudly through the center of the bowing people.

(He really feels like a person in power.)

(Is it okay for me to follow him...?)

Yoritomo-sama turned around as if reading my hesitation, and even that movement seemed calculated, with the sleeves of his kimono fluttering beautifully.

Yoritomo: Come, Yoshino.

.

.

.

.

.

Chapter 2

If you’d like to support my translations, feel free to buy me a coffee here! :)

[coffeeandbatboys]

And It All Goes Downhill. (Matt Murdock x Reader)

This one is for @omega-ish hope you get some good Matt comfort out of this one :)

After learning Matt's secret, things go wrong very quickly.

Warnings: kidnapping, lots of injuries.

You stared him down, disbelief crossing your features.

"So you're telling me that you jump around on rooftops at night punching people to death?? You're. Blind. Matthew."

"Y/N please-"

"No. Either you've been lying to me this whole time about the bruises and scars, or you're just saying this to impress me. Even then you'd still be lying."

You were seething with anger now, at the fact he didn't trust you enough to tell you.

"I can't do this right now, Matt."

"I'm sorry. I'm so, incredibly sorry."

"And I," you grabbed your coat, opening the door. "Don't want to hear another word from you."

~~~

"Alright, easy buddy. Take my money." You held it out for the thug, who was jittery and almost frightened.

"Necklace."

The one that Matt had given you. Why should you care? You were mad at him right now. But you always fixed it somehow.

"No, you asked for the money, you got-"

A gunshot rang out, and the thug sprinted away in fear. You looked around, trying to determine the source. That's when you saw two men exit a warehouse building to your right. They caught sight of you and pursued you. No doubt they just killed someone. Before you could get away, though, they overtook you and the world went black.

~~~

When you awoke, you felt the bonds around your wrists. Around you seemed to be another warehouse of sorts. It seemed empty, cold and damp, leaving you shivering against the harsh conditions. Then you realized that you were on the second floor. An industrial bridge spanned underneath you, from one end of the room to the other. You tasted the dried blood from your lips, and the first thought in your mind was "Oh my God. I'm going to die."

Before you could shut it down, a large, broad-shouldered figure entered your line of vision. It was Wilson Fisk. Oh I'm definitely going to die.

"Miss Y/L/N. I suppose you know why you're here."

"I witnessed the getaway of a murder?"

"All the same, I can't have you traipsing around after that. However, you may still be of some use."

"Oh? And how's that?"

"Tell me everything you know about Daredevil."

The air felt impossibly colder and you suddenly felt sick. Matt wasn't lying.

You decided to tell white lies, in order to make it seem as if he wasn't your boyfriend. As if that worked, though.

"I see him in the newspaper. Quite a guy huh? Doin' parkour on rooftops?"

"Don't play games with me L/N."

"Look, I've never interacted with the devil of Hell's Kitchen. Only seen him from a distance." It wasn't a complete lie. You'd never actually seen Matt as the Devil. At least, not in action.

Just then, you heard a commotion outside, and your heart skipped a beat. Could it be him?

Sure enough, he burst into the second floor of the warehouse with Fisk's men hot on his tail.

Fisk made his own getaway and the Devil of Hell's Kitchen was left to fight his men. One by one they were struck down. He could hear your stifled cries to him, pleading for safety.

Then the last of the goons who was closest to you, fell off the bridge. His Neck twisted as he landed, making an awful cracking sound.

All of the sudden Matt stopped, horrified. You tried to call out for him, but he stood completely still in shock. It was like his senses were muddled, and he couldn't find you. Even this close he couldn't lock onto your heartbeat. He feared that the crack was of your neck, and not the goon's.

"Matt!!" You screamed. That brought him back to reality. Nearly breaking down, he rushed over to you, cradling your face in his hands.

"Oh my-I thought you died...are you hurt?" He asked as he undid the ropes on your wrists.

"Matt I'm fine. I just want to go home."

"Are you sure? Aren't you still mad at me?"

Your heart broke. "No, no, honey. You just saved me. And I believe you now."

"I'm sorry for not telling you..."

"Matt. Its OK. I just want to go home with you and clean up. I'm not angry with you anymore. I love you." Reaching up, you caressed his chin, before placing a soft kiss on his lips. He whispered a soft "I love you, I'm sorry" against them.

"Now let's go home."

[p-taryn-dactyl]

in the shadows | 1 |

a/n: look…ik this isn’t a request or part of any of my series’s but…i just couldn’t not write this idea that burst into my head in my genetics course alright?? (Ik what you’re thinking ‘oh great another series for her to abandon’ lol, ive never abandoned a series I’m just extremely slow and self conscious about my writing

word count: 1.4k

warning(s): author recently got over her extreme dislike for steve rogers so if anything feels forced it probably is - timeline might not make sense but whatever its my timeline now - nazis (WWII) - canon death - reader burns someone alive but its a nazi so its fine - this is literally like if Y/N was in every movie and participated in the plot - not explicitly stated in this part but reader is the mythological inspiration for the devil, bc I’m extra - slow? - lots of time jumps I’m sorry - i do not remember much of CA:FA soooo - Y/N is an eternal but they are not explicitly mentioned in this chapter

prompt: while the others separated after the supposed defeat of the Deviants, you immersed yourself into the world, it’s people, it’s culture. you love earth and would do anything to defend it but the celestials stand in your way. this is the story of how, in the shadows, you were the driving force protecting the world. (I’m sorry if this prompt is confusing - I couldn’t quite gather my thoughts)

Across the room, you gave Erskine a questioning stare. The scientist was looking at a clipboard, his brows furrowed together in a way that indicated the wheels of his mind were turning rapidly. Brushing off the soldier that was so boldly flirting with you, you made your way towards your friend, startling him once you came to look over his shoulder. Your eyebrows shot up at the list you read, every imaginable disqualifier for the military written in harsh black ink.

“This is a joke, right?”

Admittedly, your voice was hard, weighed down with the exhaustion of the war, tired of each candidate you presented being dismissed. Erskine sighed, looking at you with a similar exhausted expression but his eyes held hope.

“He has proven to be a good man, a perfect candidate!”

You raised a singular eyebrow, pressing your pointer finger down on the picture paper clipped to the file.

“He looks like a gust of wind could knock him over. I could take him with one arm tied behind my back, blindfolded, and walking on a tight rope.”

You watched as the scientist held back a smirk, determined not to encourage your words.

“Y/N, my dear, we both know you could do exactly that with any competitor.”

You shrugged, nodding your head in agreement. Still, you took the clipboard from him, looking over the file hesitantly.

“So, why is this boy the one?”

Erskine’s eyes lit up.

“Besides the determination and strength I see in him, he also exhibits selflessness. Today, he jumped onto a false grenade to protect his squad, not knowing it was a faux.”

Blinking, you gave your old friend a blank stare.

“So, your grand idea is to give this boy super serum…instead of therapy?”

Erskine made to argue but you held up a hand, passing him back the file.

“Aside from the asthma and the heart palpitations, you just said he jumped onto an actual bomb. I’ll approve of your selection, Abe, because we are running out of time, but let me speak with him first.”

Erskine sighed, nodding his head.

“Fine, but be quick, the General wants the demonstration soon.”

As he walked away, you leaned against the wall, flexing your hands in an attempt to calm your nerves. This had to work. Setting your shoulders, you adjusted your blouse and slacks before setting off to the medical room where Erskine’s candidate waited. You pulled back the curtain, shooing away the doctor inside with a look. The boy looked even thinner in person, you took into account, before smiling and holding out your hand. He took it with slight hesitation, confusion sparkling in his blue eyes.

“Is everything alright, ma’am? The doctor told me I could be released to my barracks before tomorrow.”

You nodded, apparently calming the nerves of the man as he relaxed slightly.

“I only have a few questions, then you’re ready to go Mr. Rogers.”

——

Peggy smiled at you as you took your place beside her, surrounded by a variety of military men. She grasped your hand tightly before clasping her hands together.

“This’ll work right?”

She spoke through her smile, voice hushed. You nodded reassuringly, resting a hand on her shoulder.

“It better but don’t worry, Steve is completely safe.”

Peggy sighed and the experiment started.

The next few moments were ingrained in your mind forever. The serum working, revealing a completely changed Steve Rogers. Howards excited cheer, Peggy’s blush as she ‘examined’ the man, Erskine’s proud expression.

Then came the explosion, the gunshots. Erskine falling to the ground, blood staining his shirt. Steve being the last person he saw. Steve looking over at you, almost gasping at the fire he saw in your eyes. You nodded, your silent permission setting off the soldier as he ran after the HYDRA agent, anger and grief fueling his pace. You knelt next to your friend, silent tears streaming down your face, grief coursing through your veins. This wasn’t the first loss you’d experienced, 7,000 years of being on this planet meant thousands of funerals, thousands of heartbreak. But no matter how many, each death chipped away your control, threatening to release the celestial power residing within you.

—-

Steven Grant Rogers was an idiot. A complete and utter dimwit. No brain cell in sight. Absolutely none. And you made sure he knew.

“You’re an idiot.”

You hissed into his ear as you felt the plane rattle in the air. You heard Peggy’s muffled laugh and let yourself smirk a bit before returning to glare at the super soldier.

“I’m an idiot for wanting to save my best friend?”

Damn him.

“Oh shut up. You’re an idiot for going into an active war zone, against orders, barely any training or experience under your belt, and wearing a helmet meant for a showgirl.”

Steve had the decency to look slightly embarrassed before raising a cocky eyebrow and turning to face your fiery gaze.

“You came with me though.”

He sounded like he had won the argument, a small smile on his face. Rolling your eyes, you scoffed.

“To keep your stupid ass from dying. Howard, we’re almost there.” You halted your insult to inform the pilot, your senses sharpening as the plane crossed into enemy territory.

—-

You were sick of this war, sick of these monsters parading as men, sick of their stupid symbol, sick, sick, sick.

Steve had saved Bucky.

Bucky had died.

Steve and the Commandos were inside the headquarters of the Skull, each fighting their own battle. The Captain was against the Red Skull and you weren’t there to help, to protect. Instead, you were stuck fending off these pests that continued to fire their guns at you, no matter how little damage the bullets seemed to cause. One soldier seemed to grow balls, flipping his gun around to make it more of a baton. Yelling, he charged at you, swinging his weapon. The wood and metal splintered, shattering towards the ground. In a split second, you had him on his knees, hand on his throat. All bullets shot at you suspended in the air, creating some sense of a shield. Your grip tightened as you watched the soldier fumble for breath. Cocking your head to the side, you let the fire return to your eyes, the flames igniting the fear of the doomed man.

“sie Teufel!” He gasped out, lips rapidly chapping as the heat radiating from your body over took him. You let the fire running through your veins be released, swirling around the nazi soldier in a hellish cloak. His screams shocked his comrades, the smell of his burning flesh radiating through the air. When his burnt bones crumpled, the ash fell through your fingers and you turned towards the remaining men. As they slowly stepped backwards, prepared to run, your celestial energy burst from you, disintegrating any life form in its way.

Sighing, you reeled your power back in. As you walked towards the compound, you felt dread settle in your stomach. Something had happened, you could feel it in the air. You ran until you found Peggy, tears running down her face as she sobbed into a radio. When she looked up, you sagged against the doorway, closing your eyes.

He was gone. You had failed.

—-

~70 YEARS LATER

It wasn’t everyday you got a text from the Director of SHEILD while having lunch with the worlds most famous man. Sighing, you opened your phone, prepared to see a failed mission report to find Natasha’s sister. But what it said shocked you, causing the fork to fall out of your hand and clatter onto the plate. Tony startled a bit, looking at you above his sunglasses. Pepper and Rhodes also paused, sending you concerned looks. You swallowed, your potstickers losing their flavor. When Tony’s eyes met yours, you sent him a quiet apology, excusing yourself from the table.

“They found him.”

—

You had tried to explain all the problems with room Steve would wake up in, but you found your words dismissed. Fury sent you an apologetic glance as the two of you made your way through the crowded streets of New York City, chasing after a solider from another time. Nick was the first to speak with him, standing silent as Steve mourned his lost date. When he turned back around, however, you had made yourself known, coming to stand next to the Director.

“Y/N?”

“It’s about damn time, Rogers. Did you have a nice nap?”

a/n: look, ik this wasn’t the greatest fic i’ve ever written but I’m just proud of myself for actually writing something. i’m going to continue this series bc i just feel like its personal for some reason. Next part will be explaining Y/N’s relationship with Tony Stark and the IronFam!!

[starlitangels]

Thrown To the Wolves

I was playing with this headcanon a while back and now... here you go. 3.0k words (almost exactly!)

CW: verbal arguing

—

David Shaw: You. Me. Den. 20 minutes.

Me: Yeesh. You could at least buy me dinner first.

David Shaw: That’s not what I’m getting at and you know it. Den in 20.

Me: Ugh. Fine. Yessir.

—

“David?” I called into the quiet den.

After a moment, he emerged from the door with the beaten-up Alpha’s Office placard on it. His eyes were bloodshot. He jerked his head in indication for me to follow him into the office.

We each sat in an armchair on the visitor side of the desk.

“What’s up?” I asked.

“My dad is dead.”

My jaw dropped. “Oh my God. I’m sorry. What happened?”

“I don’t know for sure. The Department is being cagey.”

I scoffed. “Typical. We gonna break in and steal their records?” I couldn’t help lighting up just a little. Anything to stick it to the Department sounded fun to me.

David’s green eyes bored into me. “Tank. You know what my dad’s death means, don’t you?”

“Uh…”

“Remember a certain ceremony in the woods five years ago?”

“When you were made beta?”

“Yes. And…?”

Realization hit me. “Oh my God you’re the alpha now.”

“There we go. Now you’re on the same page,” David snapped. 

I rolled my eyes. “Alright. New bossman. What am I doing here, then? Come to finally throw me out of the pack now that you’re in charge?”

“What? No. Where did—why would you think—no. No, I’m not. Just the opposite, actually.”

“Okay…?”

“I’ve been doing some… thinking—”

“Uh-oh. You know how bad that is for you.”

“Shut up and let me finish, Tank,” David snarled. I snapped my mouth shut. That tone wasn’t one to trifle with. I could mess with David a little, but not when he started to cross from irritated into angry. He took a deep breath and sighed heavily. “I need you to be the beta of the pack.”

I blinked, eyebrows raising. “Excuse me, I’m sorry, what?”

“You heard me.”

“Yeah—I’m just giving you a chance to take it back.”

David shook his head.

I threw my hands in the air. “Why me? Why not Asher? He’s your best friend and you trust him a hell of a lot more than you should trust me.”

“I would choose Ash. But…” David’s mouth faltered a little and—for the first time in my life—he looked sheepish. He closed his eyes and looked away from me with a frustrated growl. I stared with wide eyes as I put some pieces together.

“Oh… my God. You’ve got a crush on him!” I whispered, even though there was no one else in the den to eavesdrop. Not that whispering would do much good against shifter ears. “You can’t make him the beta because it's a conflict of interest!” One of my hands lifted to slightly cover my gaping mouth. “You want him.” I couldn’t stop the smile that pulled up my face, somewhat grateful that David couldn’t bring himself to look at me. “Oh man. So many things make sense now. Not just the beta bit.”

“It’s not just a conflict of interest, Tank. This wouldn’t be the first time an alpha and beta were… involved,” David grumbled.

I raised a brow. “Okay.”

“I… I can’t… I can’t subject Ash to…”

“To a leadership position where he’d be facing all the worst cruelties the Imperium has to offer,” I finished.

“I know Asher is strong enough. But…”

“But you’re in love with him and want to protect him.”

David bounced an eyebrow. “You could put it that way.”

I snorted. “But you’re fine throwing me to the metaphorical and literal wolves.”

That got him to finally look at me again. His head whipped around and he glared at me. “Tank—”

“Oh don’t get up in arms about it. I know that’s not what you meant. I’m just giving you guff.”

A muscle worked in his jaw. “Are you accepting the position or not?”

I rested my chin on my palm, stroking one of the scars on my face with my fingernail, staring back at David thoughtfully. “You really want me? Not Milo or Amanda?”

David huffed. “The Imperium is a harsh place, Tank. I need someone tough to face it with me.”

“And someone who’s not at all afraid of or intimidated by you in case you start falling prey to corruption.”

“… Right.”

I nodded. “Okay. I'll do it.”

He blinked slowly. “Wait. Really?”

“Yeah. You chose me and I’ll respect that.” I cleared my throat. “I give you a lot of hell, David. Because, well, it’s funny—but I know you can take it. But if you’re trusting me with this, then I’m going to do my best to serve.”

He blinked. “Thank you.”

I shrugged. “Maybe it’s about time I stop disappointing everyone.”

—

“So…” I said in the car ride back from the Department building where David and I had registered me as the beta of the pack. The pack ceremony would come later. “How long have you had a crush on Ash?”

The leather steering wheel creaked with how hard David clenched his hands around it. I half-expected him not to answer and growl at me to mind my own business.

“I… don’t know. I don’t know when things changed.”

I crossed my legs, setting one foot on my opposite knee. “When did you realize it?”

David shrugged. “Few years ago.”

“Did… Gabe… know?”

“Probably. I never talked about it, but he probably figured it out.”

I nodded. Part of me wanted to tease. Part of me wanted to be genuine. Legally, I was his pack beta. Emotionally, he was more like my irritating older brother.

“So… why haven’t you done anything about it?”

David scoffed. “Asher deserves better.”

“Oh my G—you’re a pack alpha of the biggest pack in the capital of the Imperium! ‘Deserves better’?! David, please! Ash couldn’t aim higher than you! Not looking at other shifters, anyway.”

David shot me a quick look before turning his eyes back to the road. “Tank, you know what I’m like. That’s what he deserves better than. It’s not rank or status. It’s… personality. Asher deserves someone better than me.”

I blinked owlishly at him, staring. “Are… are you serious, Shaw?” I demanded. David’s eyebrows scrunched, like he was confused. “Asher is your best friend. And, newsflash, if you for some inexplicable reason didn’t already know, you are his best friend too. If he couldn’t handle your personality he would have stopped talking to you as much as he does a long time ago, got it? Sure, Ash is a friendly, bubbly guy who can get along with just about anyone, but he chooses, again and again, to spend time with you.” I waved one hand around vaguely, the other rubbing the side of my face. “What isn’t clicking for you here?!”

“Look, I’m already doing something about it, okay?” David snapped.

“And what’s that? Pining?”

“Making you beta!”

I shut my mouth. For a second, anyway. “So… are you going to ask him out?”

He sucked in a deep breath through his nose and growled low in his throat as he exhaled. “... Yeah.”

“Good. Because if he finds out you made me beta before you ask him out, he’s gonna be so damn hurt. And then Milo and I are gonna have to hear him whine about how you don’t trust him and that he’s letting you dooowwwn—” The sarcastic whining in my own voice made David roll his eyes as I started to laugh. “Hey,” I continued softer, “drop me off at the den so I can grab my bike and then you go get him. Stop wasting time. You’ve wasted enough already.”

David shot me a glare before turning his eyes back to the road. “Shut up,” he muttered. Half-heartedly.

I snorted. “You made me beta. Not a chance,” I retorted. “You get to listen to my second opinion on every damn decision you’re making for the pack until you demote me or one of us dies.”

“And I’m grateful for that,” David said. “You have a good head on your shoulders.”

“Technically it’s on my neck and I’ve never understood that phrase but… thanks, I guess.”

David grunted.

The rest of the drive back to the den was quiet. I’d folded my arms over my torso and slouched down in the passenger seat, staring out the window like a moody teenager. David didn’t even turn on the radio. I’d never understood how he could just sit in silence like that without music.

When we got to the den, Asher’s car was there, parked behind my motorcycle. A slow smile spread over my face.

“Not a word,” David growled.

“Nope. That’s not my place,” I replied, even though I was still smiling wide.

We got out of the truck and headed for the den. David marched right in but I just slung around the doorway to grab my helmet and motorcycle jacket off the coat rack next to the door. 

“Bye!” I called, swinging back out the door and shutting it behind me before getting on my bike and driving off to go home.

—

Incoming Call… Asher

I snatched my phone off the end table and accepted the call. “What’s up?” I asked.

“Do you have a minute to talk?”

I reminded myself that I was the beta now—and I needed to let the pack take priority over pretty much everything. “Sure,” I replied.

“Good.” He hung up.

“Huh?” I mumbled, staring at my phone screen.

Bang-bang-bang! The sound of a fist pounding on my door seemingly answering the unspoken question.

I got off the couch and went to the door, popping it open after a brief glance through the peephole revealed it was Asher. “Hey, Ash,” I said, opening the door wider. He stepped in. Unusually quiet.

I shut the door—

And immediately ducked away from Asher trying to hit me.

“Ash, what the hell?”

“What is going on?!” Asher demanded sharply.

“Uh… what?”

“Don’t—play—dumb—with me, Tank!” Asher snarled. I blinked several times.

“Ash, I genuinely have no clue what you’re talking about.”

“Do you think I’m stupid?!”

“What gave you that idea? Of course not!”

Asher growled and for a second I thought he was going to shift. I slid one foot back to brace my stance to shift as well, but he stayed a man. “Then why did I see you and David get out of his truck—together—at the den? Before you just hopped on your bike all hunky-dory and swanned off!”

“Did… did David not tell you?”

“That you two are hooking up?! No! Why would my best friend trust me with something like that?!”

Pieces clicked into place. “Ohhh,” I said.

“What?” Ash snarled.

“Did David say anything to you after I left?” I tried to be gentle, but abrasiveness was in my nature, and despite my efforts I was usually about as gentle as sandpaper.

“I’m sure he probably wanted to.”

I pinched the bridge of my nose. Asher was the most emotionally intelligent man I’d ever met in my life. He could read people better than a daemon. I was nowhere close to his level and had always struggled with feelings. “This is a misunderstanding,” I said.

“Oh, is it?” he spat.

I growled and clenched my fists, tempted to throw one of my own. Asher’s missed because I was more experienced than he was in physical combat. Mine wouldn’t miss him—for the same reason. So I kept my hands to myself. “Yes. It is,” I ground out. “First of all: how dare you assume I’m hooking up with David. He’s like a brother to me and that’s disgusting. Second of all, we were coming back from the Department building.”

“Doing what? Registering a mating bond?”

I gagged. “Did you not hear what I just said?! No!” I growled and shoved a hand over the top of my head, nails digging lightly against my scalp. “Look, David was supposed to tell you this, but he took me to the Department because…” I was loathe to take this news out of David’s hands, but for the sake of pack dynamics and trying to save my dumbass alpha’s possible relationship, I was going to have to. “Because Gabe’s death made David the alpha, and David registered me as his new beta.”

Asher’s eyes widened. “Why…” He looked around my somewhat barren apartment. I had a couple pictures tacked to the walls, but not much else by way of decoration. “He picked you?”

I nodded. “Yeah.” I tried not to be hurt by his incredulous tone, but it still stung.

“Why would he pick you?” Ash demanded.

I gave up on trying to be subtle or gentle. “Because he’s in love with you, dammit, and wants someone expendable to run the pack with him.” I grabbed his shoulders and gave him a gentle shake. “He’s trying to protect you, moron! Get with the program: the Imperium sucks. And it sucks to run a pack. David’s fine throwing me to the wolves as long as it means you don’t have to. Asher, you’re the light of this pack in a dark world. He’d rather I be the one throwing myself at the Imperium for the sake of our pack than risk dimming your light. So shut—up. It was a misunderstanding.”

Asher’s eyes had filled with tears the second I said David was in love with him and he just kept sobbing through my whole impassioned, half-shouted speech.

Once I was done, Asher surged forward. I thought was going to tackle me—and he practically did. But his arms wrapped around me and he sobbed into my chest. I patted his back awkwardly and glanced around for my phone. I managed not to break out of Asher’s hold as I bent backward just enough to snatch it off the back of the sofa.

Me: I’ve been your beta for one hour and I’m already cleaning up your messes, Shaw.

David Shaw: Meaning?

Me: I have your future boyfriend here, crying, after *I* got accused of hooking up with you and had to explain what’s actually happening Me: Come pick him up Me: Please Me: David, he’s hugging me and I don’t know what the hell to do

David: I’ll be right there.

—

I strode into the meeting with my head held high, ignoring the way the other alphas looked around at me.

One of them stepped into my path. Eyes flicking me up and down. “And you are?”

“I’m the Shaw Pack beta,” I said.

“Where’s the Shaw Pack alpha?”

“Celebrating his anniversary with his mate. I volunteered to take his place.”

“This meeting is for alphas only.”

“And, according to Imperial Department of Law Enforcement Law One-Sixteen, Subsection Eight-Point-Three, Shifters: ‘in the presence of extenuating circumstances in which an alpha cannot present as the leading representative of their pack, the beta is entitled to take their alpha’s place with full rights and responsibilities as acting alpha until such time as the alpha returns.’ So don’t try me,” I retorted. Thank Milo’s mate for making me memorize that damn law, I thought.

The alpha standing in my way clenched his jaw. I brushed past him and went right to Gregory Keaton.

“Evening, sir,” I greeted.

“Well, well. Hello, Tanker. I see you’re handling your responsibilities well. How’s David?”

“He’s great. On a trip with his mate. So here I am.” I spread my arms like I was on display. Gregory chuckled at the dry joke.

“Well, he’ll be proud of how you’re handling yourself tonight.”

“Thank you.”

“Go grab your seat. The meeting will be starting soon.”

I nodded to him and went to the chair designated Shaw Pack, plopping down. I was the youngest in the room by a solid decade, but none of these alphas except Gregory had been serving longer than five years. 

I listened to the meeting, brain spinning in the What Would David Do? circles for the entire first hour. The primary answer was be quiet and listen. David’s philosophy of don’t speak often, so when you do your words matter served me just fine. I didn’t have a philosophy but I wasn’t much of a talker. I listened and I observed. Most of my instincts watched for weaknesses and points to strike. Tonight was no exception.

I pulled out my phone halfway through.

Me: How do you deal? This meeting is boring

David Shaw: We all do what we have to, Tank.

At that moment, someone barked my name. I looked up. “Are you even listening?!” the alpha demanded. Same one as before.

“Have been for the last hour,” I replied blithely, crossing my arms.

“You’ve haven’t said a word,” the alpha snapped.

I raised an eyebrow. “You haven’t said anything worth responding to.”

“Tanker,” Gregory warned lightly from two seats to my left. I glanced at him innocently.

“Tanker,” the derisive alpha sneered. “What kind of nickname is that?”

“The kind that’s earned.” I rolled up one jacket sleeve to reveal a few thin, old scars. “You think David picked me to be beta because of my winning personality? Wrong-o. He picked me because I’m the second-most-skilled fighter in the damn pack after David himself.” My legs tensed to stand, but I stayed in my seat. “As I said earlier tonight: don’t try me.”

I heard Gregory snicker. “John, I don’t recommend tangling with any member of the Shaw Pack,” he said. “The business end of all their claws are particularly sharp.”

The other alpha scoffed, but didn’t do more than level a glare at me.

—

David Shaw: How was the meeting?

Me: I didn’t get in any physical fights, if that’s what you’re asking. So I call that a win.

David Shaw: Gregory texted me and said I’d be proud of you. I am proud of you, Tank. you’re taking the whole beta thing in stride and that’s something to be proud of.

Me: Thanks, David. That actually means a lot to me to hear.

—

Tag list: @zozo-01 @thegoldenlittlerose @mainhoesstuff @darlin-collins (and adding @daveyistheloml after her tag saying she wouldn’t sleep until she got this fic so here you go!)

[idiotic21]

Wanted, The Bad Batch -> 02 - New Friends

Previous All Stories

The Bad Batch and Ryki had reached a deal. In exchange for her joining their crew, they'd provide her with security and a place to stay. "Alright," Hunter said standing up, "Let's get going." 

A chuckle escaped Ryki "Woah there. We're not in a rush, are we?". The boys exchanged glances, "Not exactly...," Hunter replied. "Awesome, cause I was actually hoping you guys would like to stay for dinner?"  

"You, want to eat with us?" Tech asked with surprise on behalf of his baffled team. Ryki quirked her eyebrows and nodded, "Why not?" She pointed to the small bond fire near her garden: "Plus, I kinda already have some stew over the fire, and waste not, you know. Also, I'm sure your daughter would want something to eat." 

"Daughter!?" The four exclaimed, suddenly their eyes were wandering everywhere else rather than looking at Ryki, she laughed at their sudden shyness. Hunter cleared his throat, walking himself to the door "I'll go get her." then he paused, "Oh, and she's not technically our daughter-" 

"Whatever you say, Sarge, just wake her up already. Dinner is almost ready." Ryki mock saluted Hunter, then turned to Tech, Echo and Wrecker. "Now, I suppose you guys could help me pack some stuff up?" 

-----

'Daughter', Hunter thought in his silent walk to the ship. Though it's only been a short while since he's gotten to know Omega, he had to admit that the young girl had somehow wormed her way to his heart and into the hearts of the rest of the Batch. Wrecker even made her, her own room. Deep down, Omega meant a lot to him and he would protect her. He did what Omega thought of her new family. 'Family', the Sargent sighed, he approached Omega's room and knocked on her room's wall. "Omega?" 

It was quiet for a while until he heard a sleepy groan from the room. Hunter chuckled, 'she sure loves to sleep in her own room'. Climbing up the ladder, Hunter poked his head through the curtains. Omega was curled up in her blankets as she clutched Lula, deep in slumber. She looked so peaceful, Hunter almost didn't want to wake her up, "Hey, kid. Dinner time." Sleepily rubbing her eyes, Omega sat up with messy hair. "Where are we?", she asked noticing the lack of engine sound from the Marauder. 

"Still on Ord Mantell. We had to stop to make a new, uhm, friend." 

"Friend?! Dinner!"

Hunter was still hesitant to call Ryki a friend, but they were in a desperate situation. Besides, he didn't sense anything of malice from the Mirialan, not yet at least. Hunter forced a smile and soon enough, Omega was motivated to run out of her room eager to see this new 'friend' of theirs.

-----

"Wrecker, Echo, catch that droid!" 

Three Bad Batchers were chasing around Ryki's malfunctioning hybrid droid, B7. She asked if Tech could check him up, he agreed, but the spherical droid had a personality of its own and started to roll around the house, running away from Tech. 

"Got him!" Wrecker managed to corner B7 against the wall, Echo revving his robotic hand intimidatingly. While B7 was distracted, Tech jumped on the droid and finally got a hold of him. With a few tweaks here and there and some rather harsh language from B7, Tech managed to do some rewiring and fixed the stubborn droid. B7 complained in binary and rolled away angrily, Ryki sighed. "Thanks for fixing him up, and uh, sorry for his words. B7's got a personality." Offering a hand to Tech, she pulled him up on his feet. "No problem," He nodded. 

"What type of droid is that anyway?" 

Ryki shrugged, "Honestly, I have no idea. I found him wandering around in Black Spire, the next thing I knew he followed me around like a lost pet." She explained to Echo, cringing soon after when she heard some questionable beeps and chirps from her droid. "Oh, and thanks for the help Echo, Wrecker." 

The mirialan looked around her temporary home and huffed, "Looks like I'm all packed thanks to you guys." Wrecker looked a little confused when he saw only two bags on the floor, "That's all you got?". Ryki nodded, "What can I say, I am a light traveller. We'll take this to the ship after dinner." 

"Everything alright? Saw an angry droid running out there." 

"Everything's fine, Hunter," Tech informed his brother. "So Hunter, is your little girl awake?" Ryki walked up to the door where the Sargent leaned against. Hunter nodded his head towards the herb garden. Following his line of sight, she saw a little girl walking around the garden with the widest smile on her face. Ryki chuckled, "She's very curious". Omega's small gasps and excited laughter brought the rest of the crew to the house's entrance. "She's not seen other planets before," Echo expressed sadly which in turn spiked Ryki's own curiosity about Omega. "What do you mean?"

"Well, before she met us, Omega was only ever on Kamino and not allowed to go anywhere. All of this is very new to her." Ryki quietly dwelled on Tech's information. From what she could assume, Omega didn't have an interesting life before this. She pitied Omega, in her eyes no child should be kept locked away. They watched as Omega pranced around and poked at the different plants in Ryki's garden. Slowly, Omega's attention was drawn to the bonfire. No doubt the smell of sweet stew had attracted her, though she got a little too close to the fire for any of the boys' comfort. Hunter was about to lunge out towards Omega, only for a small hand to hold him back by the shoulder, "Don't worry, Hunter. She knows not to get too near. I'm going to go talk to her." 

Weirdly enough, Hunter awkwardly did as the mirialan told him to. Ryki patted Hunter's shoulder, then flashed the guys a smile before walking off to Omega. Oddly enough, Ryki somehow reassured them that Omega would be fine under the woman's care. "Is it just me, or are we actually okay with Ryki being around Omega?" Wrecker asked confused. "Ryki is a woman. Her maternal instincts must be kicking in. That and Hunter can sense if she means any harm." Tech explained like it was the most obvious thing ever. "If Hunter does not worry, we don't need to." 

"That does not answer my question Tech." 

Tech rolled his eyes, "Yes Wrecker. We are all okay with it. Surprisingly." 

"I wouldn't get too close to the fire if I were you." Omega jumped slightly from her position. She turned to only find herself gaping with awe at the mirialan in front of her "Woah...", Omega cooed. Ryki felt amusement rising within, "Hello there little one. I'm Ryki Taala. You can call me Ryki." Omega watched as the mirialan, Ryki, sat on the ground, not wanting to intimidate the girl. "Woah... what-who are you?" 

Ryki watched contently as Omega carefully approached her, eyes scanning her up and down with innocence.  She could see a billion questions pass Omega's brown eyes. "I'm a mirialan. How bout you? What's your name?" The playfulness and calm in Ryki's voice urged Omega to come closer. "I-I'm Omega. I'm a clone." Omega continued to look at the green-skinned woman and couldn't help herself from asking, "Why is your skin green? I've never seen anything like it." 

"It's just how my people look like." Ryki took Omega's curiosity about the matter as a good sign of the child's growth. Omega could not help herself but awe at the woman again, "You're soo pretty. Your eyes are soo beautiful!" She admitted out loud. A smirk played on Ryki's face, she tilted her head and grinned, "You're beautiful yourself young one." Ryki held out a hand and Omega grasped it tightly, bouncing lightly on her feet. "It's wonderful to meet you, Omega." Green emerald eyes met the younger, vibrant golden-brown ones. The Batchers watched with amazement in their eyes and an unspoken bond slowly began to surface between the two females.

-----

Another serving of stew was passed around. Ryki had the Batchers gather around the fire and she offered them bowls of sweet stew. "Awh yeah! This is the best thing I've eaten in a long time." Wrecker was more than happy to accept the other bowl of stew that Ryki kept for him. "You should make this more often." He complimented. 

Ryki had a very satisfied smile on her face. By how the boys and Omega ate, it looked to her as if they had not eaten anything like this before. "Have you not eaten stew before?" She braved her question. "No. We usually just eat ration bars. They're aren't as appetizing as this." Echo told her. 

"Hmm. Looks like you'll be eating more of my stew soon." Several quiet yes' from Tech and Omega made Ryki laugh. While the six rested by the fire, Ryki was entertaining the many questions the boys and Omega had for her. Tech as usual asked about Ryki's many herbs and how she patented them. Echo was just as curious, he asked how much her medicine was worth. "Well, in the black market it could go up for about five thousand credits per vile of patented medicine." She somehow had an inkling that she, Tech and Echo would get along well. Though she made it quite clear that she was not ready to reveal her past to the Bad Batch when Echo had asked her about her what she worked as. Echo seemed to catch on to Ryki's uneasiness about the subject and dropped it.

The boys had moved what little of Ryki's belongings into the Havoc Marauder. Tech took it upon himself to make sure that all her patenting equipment was kept by his own tinkerings and creations, making sure it was far away from Wrecker's destructiveness. Hunter stood watch as Ryki and Omega put out the bond fire, the mirialan not missing a beat to splash Omega with some water. Watching the two girls act carefree around each other even though they just met made him wonder why it felt so natural to allow Ryki this close to Omega. He couldn't help but smile, it made him feel weird.

"What is it?" Hunter turned to see Echo standing beside him. The two boys watched as Omega and their new recruit continued to mess around. "You're worried," Tech noted. Hunter sighed, folding his arms. "How can I not be. We don't really know her that well and we're are welcoming her on board. She's on the run and so are we. That's just going to draw more trouble for us." 

"True. She's made it three weeks free of worry though. Not to mention she did allow you to sense any bad intentions from her." 

Hunter knows Ryki won't hurt Omega, but the past that she kept hidden troubled him. He did not want any more bounty hunters coming after them. They could not even handle Fennec. The tenseness from the Sargent was easy for Ryki to pick up on, even with the distance between them. "Alright, your friend's a little impatient waiting for you." Ryki joked and pointed at Hunter. Omega grumbled a little, "I still wanna play". 

"We'll play in the ship later, alright?" Nodding, Omega skipped ahead and went into the ship, Echo following her behind. 

"You're sure about leaving?" 

The mirialan stopped just a few paces away from Sargent. She didn't need to search his mind to notice his distrust. "What's wrong dark and broody? Not reconsidering your offer are you?" The Sargent ignored her sarcastic quip, "Your good with Omega," he simply stated. "I suppose I am. Thank my instincts I guess." 

"What are you hiding about your past? You tensed up when Echo asked you." 

"One would tense up when the topic is overly sensitive. You don't find me asking you about your missing teammate now do you." 

Hunter narrowed his eyes and clenched his jaw. Her words clearly affected him and she could see it. "I wish for you to respect my discretion about the topic as you would want me to mind yours, Sargent." Neither two broke their intense glare on each other. "I'm not going to hurt Omega if that's what you're worried about." 

"How can I trust you?" 

Ryki's glare hardened, "If it's one thing I cannot tolerate, is seeing a child not being able to get the life they need. I went through that and I know no child should suffer my fate." Promises past her lips, "I won't let Omega's childhood be taken from her. Whether you want to believe me or not is your choice." Not sparring another second, she walked past Hunter. Her eyes piercing the side of his head as he avoided her stare. "If it's all the same to you, I don't really know if I can trust you. You could turn me in to the nearest bounty station if you wanted to." 

Hunter finally returned her glare. "Bold of you to assume we wouldn't. We're low on credits." 

Ryki chuckled, her eyes narrowed somehow making the emerald of her eyes glow a dangerous green. "Bold of you to assume you would." 

"What do you mean?" 

"You need my talents to survive, I'll tell you that. Also, I don't think you can bear not seeing Omega not laugh and smile as she did earlier." Hunter's eyes widened. "Don't deny it, Sargent, you put up a brave, tough front. For Omega on the other hand you would do anything. So would I."

Taking one last look around her small patch of garden, Ryki mentally prepared her for her new journey. "I suppose we will just have to learn to trust each other, even if we don't quite like it." With that, she disappeared into the ships hull. Hunter watched her with tired eyes. "We have an agreement on that one." 

Next

[goldom]

AFoLiS author commentary Part 3-2

Alright, moving on...

After that point is when entries started to really fall into the norm of what I intended the story to be: me writing about whatever events I played that day, as if Stelle were writing about them. So a lot of stuff out of canon chronological order. But let's be honest, canon chronological order is a hot mess anyway.

I'm still proud of "Stellfie." Yes, I do this word-merging all the time irl, often aloud, and near-constantly mentally, which I have learned is associated with Tourette syndrome. After mentioning this to my mom a few years ago, she revealed that I was actually diagnosed with TS as a kid. Welp. And so sometimes I'm just sitting here thinking about Firefly (as you do) and suddenly burst out with "Blupils" (blue pupils) at my spouse, who has no fuckin clue what I'm on about, so then Stelle got to think it too.

Okay, Interlude 3, let's see how badly I wrote the SH... Okay this is actually fine. Yeah they're all making quiet threats, but I think it still comes across as caring. Yes, Firefly is harsh to Kafka in her thoughts, which is not canon, but in my story, we know she watched Kafka erase her girlfriend before her eyes.

On SW's joke about picking Stelle's name, I realized later that I got canon backwards about Stelle's old vs new name. Rewatching the opening cutscene, it's trying to say "her name WAS Stelle, but her new name is the one the player picks." But we're way past that now. In here, Stelle is her new name. Her old name... Well, we've heard it of course. It's ███. :)

" “A Station ornament inscribed with defense? Really?” “I meet a lot of people, okay, maybe someone will need it. "

Look. Look. Genshin has characters with attack that scales on DEF. YOU NEVER KNOW what relics you're gonna need some day! And that's why I'm always hitting the inventory cap...

" “Why would you keep a journal on paper?” Herta sneers, sounding insulted by the idea. " <- Me not noticing that Herta's avatar in SU is literally writing on paper. Oh well.

I try not to use too much cursing of any sort, if only because the game doesn't, so it would be out of character. But once in a while, Stelle just needs to bust out a "fuck off, Herta." Meanwhile, I liked getting to make up at least one silly sci-fi curse, with Herta's "Droidhead's wires."

Here's the most mundane behind the scenes detail. After I changed pens because Herta broke Stelle's, I discovered the color of the new one came out really light in the scans. So after a couple entries I went back to the original, having Stelle note on the side of a page that she replaced it. Well. Actually I accidentally picked a different one without realizing it. If you compare, the pen color isn't quite the same before and after the light-green pen section. Wow. Such lore.

Dumb headcanon: The way Screwllum talks isn't cause he's a robot, it's cause he thinks it's funny to sound robotic to the silly organics.

Okay, we're up to the creation of the seal on the journal. Oh boy that thing gave me so much aggravation. I came up with the trick clue very early, and got really attached to it. I needed the password to be "me" for Firefly. But then, "me" makes no sense for Stelle to say as the answer. Plus, "me" is a terrible password because it would so easily be said accidentally. So I ended up with that whole mess of exposition with Stelle being making up a reasoning for how it works, like "I guess the journal is being pedantic" and ugh yeah I'm still not happy with it. But I couldn't change the wording at that point, because I'd already SHOWN the thing way back in the first entry, and there it was written in the cover of the real journal. I think this probably should have been a "kill your darlings" moment, because the payoff really wasn't worth how awkward it was to justify.

Still, the moment Firefly figures it out and whispers "me" is so cute.

Alright, one more third to go in this part.

[silverdelirium]

Can I request a very filthy smutty blaise with ass kink and size kink? 🥺

MESSY OFFICE | B.Z

SUMMARY ➠ coworker!blaise teaches you a lesson and fulfills his dreams of fucking you silly.

WARNINGS ➠ oral (male receiving), tad bit of shoe fucking, dumbification, degradation, praising, rough sex, ass kink, size kink, lots of dirty talk, rushed ending. this if filthy lololol

———

blaise took a deep breath before slamming his fist down on the wooden desk of his office. the papers that were placed on top of it went flying around at the sudden movement.

his hands were shaking with irritation. if that fucking landlord could just shut the fuck up about his rent for one second-

the male’s thoughts were cut off by small, rapid knocks against the door. his brows knitted in confusion at the unanticipated invasion.

“come in!”

the door creaked as you entered the room, peeking your head through the doorway at first before going in, shutting the door behind you.

your presence emitted a groan from him. he knew that the moment you both spent time together it would somehow end in a screaming match, and blaise was not in the mood to be dealing with anything right now.

you gave him a sharp glare in response before opening your mouth to speak. yet you were cut off by your own silence as you studied the state of his office.

everything seemed so rustled and chaotic— there were papers thrown in the floor, some were even crumbled and a few candy wrappers were tossed around. “what is this mess?” you spoke, tone lacing with disgust as you picked up an old folder from the worktable; his hand was quick to swat you away, scowling you before leaning back on the desk.

“what do you want?” he squinted at you, roaming his eyes down your body suspiciously— mentally slapping himself for staring at your breasts longer than planned.

“what the fuck is up your arse today?” you scoffed, crossing your arms and walking closer to him until he had to crane his neck down to look at you.

blaise’s chest heaved up and down as he quickly undid the top button of his shirt, turning away from you and taking long strides around the room. he closed his eyes and really hated himself for wanting nothing more than to shut that smart mouth of yours with his hardening cock. it was too much for him— and if there was one-way blaise loved to take his stress out on, was sex. and god— that stupid little skirt of yours that was begging to be lifted and reveal that sweet cunt that plagued his mind at the worst moments was the last push he needed to man up and fuck you as he had always wanted to.

you observed him in silence, watching how he mumbled something to himself about ‘i can’t think of her like this.’

quietness ran across the walls for a few moments before blaise was back in front of you, muttering a “fuck it” and connecting his lips to yours.

the fleeting kiss had you bewildered for a few seconds, eyes wide and mouth unmoving as the tall man held the back of your head in his palm. you didn’t kiss him back at first, but you didn’t protest either. and you’d be dammed if you didn’t take advantage of the opportunity to get fucked brain dead by blaise zabini.

but who could blame you when you kissed him back with the same— maybe even more— force; it was messy and heated all at once, the frustration that you sensed from earlier was being poured in that kiss. teeth were clashing together as his tongue pressed down on yours, drawing out a breathy moan from you.

blaise cupped your rear with both hands, lifting you in an unforeseen manner, causing you to squeal lightly until you felt your bum being pressed against the cool surface of his messy desk.

he was the first to break apart from the kiss, breathing steadily as he stared down at you— even from your perched up position he was still a few inches taller.

“i’m not gonna hold back” he warned, searching your eyes for any sign of regret or hesitation that you might feel. but he was far from finding any, you wanted blaise to fuck you until he was poking out of your tummy and you wanted it now.

“i don’t care” you breathed out, reconnecting your mouth to his and almost missing out on that keen groan that came out of his mouth.

his large digits scurried under your skirt, unzipping it in a quick motion and pulling it down your legs until it pooled on the floor.

he teasingly ran his index finger up and down the soaked cotton that covered your pulsating pussy. “blaise— please” you shamelessly plead, throwing all your morals out the window and not caring about anything else but being rutted over and over again.

“look at you. begging like a well paid whore when you were being a smart ass with me not even ten minutes ago.” he chuckled, taking pride in the way you whimpered in response, bucking your hips up onto his fingers. “what is it, baby? you want me to fuck you until that dumb baby brain can only think about my cock, yeah?”

his words struck a bit of sense into you and you huffed in response— “are you actually gonna give me what i want and fuck me properly or are you all talk?”

you messed up and you messed up big; you could tell by the way hir pupils dilated and the slow touches against your clothed pussy stopped. his tongue darted out to poke on his left cheek as he laughed lightly, stepping back and harshly bringing you down the desk.

“i’m gonna fuck your throat until you learn how to keep useless stuff to yourself, princess” he warned, signalling down to the floor as he unbuckled his belt.

you tentatively got down on your knees, lightly scraping them against the wooden floor as you rubbed your thighs together, pawing at your lap as blaise’s erection appeared in your view of line.

was that supposed to fit in you?

blaise seemed to notice your unsureness— “you alright there, pretty girl?” his tone was softer, less stern yet with the same accent of authority he always carried.

“i— it’s… big.” you let out, feeling the tip of your ears grow hot as he chuckled before picking up a more alluring timbre “oh i’m gonna make it fit” he winked.

you swallowed thickly, already picturing the delicious stretch this man was gonna provide you. he stroked his large cock sensually before making a beeline with it to your lips, which were already parted in expectancy; he went to tease you for it but was cut off by his low moan that got provoked as the warmth of your mouth enveloped his pulsating tip.

his digits tangled themselves in your hair, good girl’s and just like that’s slipped from his mouth every time your tongue swirled around his head. and the slickness that was pouring out of you was suddenly too much to ignore— hence why you reached down to attempt and soothe the burning sensation. blaise was still enthralled with the way your worked those lips that he had dreamed of having against his around his cock— his hands tightened around your scalp as he thrusted rapidly against your mouth, desperately probing for an orgasm.

a muffled whine came from you as he fucked your throat repeatedly, causing him to look down at your teary eyes, eventually settling his irises on your hand rubbing your greedy cunt.

blaise tutted with a hint of disappointment, making your movements halt as you batted your eyelashes up at him innocently as if your mouth wasn’t stuffed with his cock that was ready to shoot its cum down your fucked out throat.

you went to furrow your brows when he kicked your hand away gently, replacing your fingers with the point of his leather shoe, your wetness already leaking down on his footwear as you whined around his cock, making his hips buck involuntarily at the vibrations— “i was gonna reward you for sucking me so well, but since you’re such a desperate slut you’re gonna have to fuck yourself on my shoe while i throat fuck you, yeah?” he asked demanded.

a weak nod was all he got in response before he was back to gripping your hair in his fist, spit drooling down your chin at the abrupt pace he set without even a warning— not that you minded.

your hips rolled slowly into his shoe, swollen clit fizzing at the stimulation; his shoe hit every right nerve ending, the sounds you made around his cock were filthy and lewd, only making his balls grow tighter as he stilled his hips, rope after rope of cum flooding your mouth.

you moaned lowly against his cock at the feeling of his warm cum spraying down your throat.

he gave tattered breaths and moans as he pulled out of your mouth, barely even taking notice of the whining mess you became, his foot now long gone from your oozing cunt.

“get the fuck up” he breathed out, staring down at your already fucked out-state— saliva all over your chin, along with a few tears decorating your frowning face as you stood up. his large hands came to cup your face, delivering a small kiss on the corner of your mouth before placing his mouth next to your ear and whispering “i’ve been trying to translate your frowns and find out what your fucking problem with me was before bending you over my desk and fucking you stupid.”

you could’ve easily moaned at his words alone if it weren’t for his lips linking with yours in a crazed kiss as he guided you towards his messy desk— which was about to be a whole lot messier.

his hands reassuringly squeezed your waist as he turned you around, his once again hard cock rubbed against your ass as he planted kisses against your neck, sucking on certain spots that had your eyes rolling onto the back of your head— his fingers making quick work of getting your shirt off, throwing it somewhere around the room as he separated himself from your now marked neck, leaving you in your undergarments that didn’t leave much to the imagination.

“i’ve been waiting to fuck you senseless for so long, baby. you don’t know how many times i spent with my hand around my cock dreaming about your tight pussy around it.” he groaned out, pushing you forward until your breasts squished against the desk, shuddering at the cold of it.

his palms massaged your left ass cheek before a harsh slap was delivered to it— and his mouth wasn’t there to cover the pornographic moan that came out of you this time, pushing your bum against his hardened dick in anticipation.

blaise grabbed a hold of his cock and steadied himself with a hand on your bum, squeezing. before he moved your panties to the side and teased your pulsating entrance with his tip, groaning slightly at the way your pussy almost swallowed him in as he pushed the tiniest bit in, coaxing a loud cry from you.

“so so tight, princess” he praised, pushing himself all the way in with a single thrust, arousal already gushing down your thighs.

the male wasted no time and in a few moments he had you with your mouth gaped open, eyes going crisscross with every un pitying snap against your hips of his.

“can you feel me all the way up in your pretty guts, baby girl? you like having this slutty cunt being taught a lesson, huh?” he growled out, eyes trained on each bounce of your ass as he sped up— the clapping sounds were enough to give away what was happening to any passerbyers outside his office; not that any of you minded at this point.

“oh! fuck blaise— right there! right there!” you babbled out, shutting your eyes tight as he brought you up with his bicep against your throat, making you loll your head back on his shoulder as his dick continuously hit that spot inside you.

blaise’s other hand snaked around your midriff, pressing down on the evident outline of his cock going in and out of your tummy. “look at me destroying your pretty little insides, sweetheart, bet you won’t be able to sit on this pretty little pussy for the next week” he cooed at you before slamming you forwards until your cheek pressed against his rattling desk.

“don’t stop! don’t stop please!” you sobbed out, squeaking lightly when his palms crashed down roughly on your ass, groans and moans echoing around the room like a chant— the pit in your stomach growing tighter and tighter by the second.

“i’m cumming blaise, i’m fucking cumming” you gasped out, lifting your head back up and pointing your nose to the ceiling as you came all-around blaise’s cock with a loud ecstatic moan.

a whimper passed by your lips as blaise continued to fuck you through your high; and it took him one look to look at the mess you left running down yours and his thighs for him to be pumping you full of his cum, steady thrusts that had him hissing as you clenched around him for a final time.

he pulled out of you to watch his cum blow out of your overstimulated pussy, the aftershocks of the intense orgasm still causing your muscles to spasm every once in a while.

“you made my office a whole lot messier” he grunted out, pointing down to the puddle that fell in between your legs, causing you to flush instantly as he chuckled and pressed light kisses to your temple.

———

🏷: @methblinds @marrymetheonott @adrianscumslut @wh0re4blaise @youreso-golden @saggyb1lls @selenesheart @dracomalfoys-wh0re @dlmmdl @lolooo22 @darlingmalfoy @littlemissnoname13 @i-love-scott-mccall @underappreciated-spoon-321 @daddybutmakeitagirl @fredshufflepuff @dracosafety @riddleswh0rekrux @lostaurorax @alexavolturisblog @s1ater @marauderswh0re1 @andineverwould @starless-starkov @black-rose-29 @tattooedkermit @purpleskymalfoy @emma67 @mypainistemporary @mauvea @teenwolfbitches28 @lissa-duh @paniicing @rav3nclawwhore @fizzleberries @malfoy-girl @alohastitch0626 @caosfanblr @memorycharm @whoreforgeorgeandfred @elizabethrosedarling

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[persephones-wren]

hii love, love your fics so I just had to request again! Could request a Kaz andd reader where he says something mean to her without meaning it but shes really sad an stattes crying to jesper and he gets angry and tells Kaz to apologise? Angst with a happy ending,please!! Thanks a ton darling💗💗

Forgiveness (Kaz Brekker x Reader)

thank you for requesting again! school has been kicking my ass, so sorry for how long writing this took, but I hope you like it! :)

Warnings: mentions of catcalling, (small) injury, idk?

Genre: angst to fluff

Word Count: 1910

To say you’ve had a shitty day would’ve been an understatement.

Heading to the White Rose to see Nina, you’d been catcalled multiple times. Maybe you were being dramatic, but the comments felt more scathing than usual, and it had gotten under your skin quicker than you thought it would. You didn’t want to use Kaz’s reputation to scare them off, but it wouldn’t have mattered. You’d still be viewed as a possession, just one that didn’t belong to them.

You had snapped at the last stranger who’d given their perverse ideals of you, and that altercation had left you a lovely slash on your arm from defending yourself. You had temporarily wrapped it up on a scarf, but you knew you would probably have to wrap it with gauze on it when you returned.

When you had asked the clerk where Nina was, he said that he’d seen her leave, but she said nothing to him. Which meant the entire journey here was a waste, and that you’d have to head home without her guaranteed cooperation with the plan your boyfriend was creating.

“Kaz, she’s not there. Clerk said she went out, but he didn’t get where. It was a waste of a trip,” you sigh, throwing down your cloak on a random chair.

Kaz sighs, lowering his head as he writes out another part of the plan. “Really, Y/N? You couldn’t go out and look for her? She told us a couple days ago that she was going to start taking trips to the market at this time. You could’ve found her there.”

“I’m sorry?” you scoff quietly, but try to adjust your tone at the icy stare he gives you. You could’ve said that nicer, sure. “I didn’t think to look for her there because I didn’t know that, Kaz. Are you sure she told us that?”

“Yes, she did. Were you not paying attention?”

“I don’t think I was there,” you refute. “I would’ve remembered if she told me.”

“I don’t have time to talk to people who can’t do their jobs,” he mutters. “Just get out and waste time for now. Let me finish what I’m working on and we’ll find her together later.”

“The hell you mean I can’t do my job?” you protest. “I did what you asked. I went to go look for her, and she wasn’t there. I thought your instructions were not to stray from my path, because you wanted me home quickly and safely.”

“If you had any shred of common sense, then you’d know that I’d only say that because I’m supposed to care about you. I’d take information over your safety.”

You still. What?

He’s supposed to care about you? Does that imply he doesn’t? He would take information over your safety.

Does he want to break up?

Stop being dramatic. Kaz doesn’t play implication games with something like that. He’d tell you outright.

But he wouldn’t care for you if he got what he wanted.

“I-um, oh,” you take a shuddery breath. Your chest feels tight and your eyes are going to water. Kaz hates dealing with over-emotional people. He needs people who can keep their cool, people who can think their way out of things. You need to get out of here before he looks up at you. You’re useless, you’re an idiot, no wonder he said you couldn’t do your job properly.

Too late. He looks up at you, frowning at your silence, but you quickly turn away, still trying to hide your face.

You laugh, and even you can tell that it’s not genuine, just an attempt at trying to hide your wavering voice. “I’m fine, Kaz. Uh- yeah, yeah! We’ll go out later and-” your throat catches as you swallow harshly. “We’ll go out and look for Nina later. See you then.” You quickly brush your tears out of the way, opening the door and stepping out.

Your steps echo down the hall, and you try and find your way to your room through the tears that now stream down your face.

I’d take information over your safety.

You still don’t know if he means it. He’s angry, but- Kaz was usually extremely candid when he was upset.

He might’ve meant every word.

You don’t notice Jes in front of you, and as you pass him, he catches your arm.

You wince, his fingers land right on the slash, and he hastily lets go, looking at you with concern. Everyone was usually about as emotional as a rock in the Barrel. What made you cry like that?

“Y/N, you okay? What happened? Why did you flinch from me? Did I do something wrong?”

His face resembles a kicked puppy, and your heart constricts with slight guilt.

“No, no- it’s not your fault, Jes- your fingers landed right on a slash I got, that’s all.”

He looks at his hands, covered in slight blood. You tug at your soaked-through scarf and look at it, and it looks even worse than when you first got it. Your grimace. So much for getting him to worry less about you. “It looks a lot worse than it actually is.” Your words are frantic and stuttered, but you hope he gets the point.

“How did that happen? I thought with Kaz’s reputation, you would be untouchable. Why isn’t he taking care of you?”

You smile sadly. The mention of Kaz tightens your chest again.  “Guy scrapped with me for a little while after catcalling me. I didn’t want to use Kaz to defend myself- me, with him? He’d be even more of a target. And Kaz is a bit upset with me right now. He doesn’t know what happened.”

“Why the hell would he be upset?”

“I didn’t get the information he wanted,” your voice is small and weak. “And he said he’d rather have the information more than my safety.”

“Which is why you’re crying.” Jes’s face has a look of understanding.

“Yes,” you affirm quietly. “Today’s just been a bad day. I’ll be alright, though, really. I know Kaz doesn’t like dealing with weak people, so I thought I wouldn’t bother-”

“You’re not weak.” His voice gains a complete new edge, and his face is determined. You suddenly get a bad feeling. What’s Jes going to suggest you do? “We’re going to go confront him. Right now.”

“Jes, I look like I’ve been crying. I’d at least like to compose myself a bit.”

“No.” He makes sure he’s grabbing your other arm, before leading you back to Kaz’s office. “He needs to know how much he’s fucked up. He’s smart, but really,” Jesper sighs, “He’s an idiot. And you deserve better than that.”

Your heart warms at his words, but you’re still nervous as he leads you down the hall, and you’re definitely panicking when he opens the door without knocking.

Kaz looks up, and a brief look of surprise is in his eyes as he looks at Jesper. Why didn’t Jesper knock? And why would Jes need him, especially at midday? Wouldn’t he be out gambling?

Kaz prepares himself to hear something stupid. He doesn’t notice you standing behind him, and his attention drifts back down to his plan.

“What do you need?”

“Apologize.”

“For?”

“For being a bloody idiot and hurting your girlfriend.”

Hurting you? He looks back up to him, and this time, you’re standing next to Jesper.

“I didn’t-” Kaz starts, but your appearance makes him go silent.

Your expression is blank, but tear streaks clearly stain your face, and you clearly look like you don’t want to be confronting him. Jesper had put you up to this.

Were you too afraid of him to do it yourself?

What did he do for you to look like that?

“You didn’t do anything?” Jesper’s voice is incredulous. “She went to the White Rose to try and find Nina, and then you come home and treat her like she’s useless because she doesn’t get what you want. She’s your girlfriend, not a goon. Have some respect for her, yeah? She followed exactly what you said, to try and get home quickly and safely, and even then, she still gets hurt. Did you even notice the bleeding gash?”

“Jes,” you whisper, “it’s fine, really-”

He doesn’t listen, and grabs at your wrist to lift your arm, pulling down the scarf and revealing the bloody cut. Kaz blinks, concern and guilt briefly flashing on his face before he smooths back his expression.

How didn’t he notice? How did that happen?

“Y’know how she got that? Men were harassing her, and she fought one of them because she didn’t want to use your name as her shield. She was trying to prevent painting an even bigger target on your back. And then you go as far,” Jes laughs angrily, “as to say that she’s not worth more than information for your fucking plan? And through all of that, she leaves you alone because she doesn’t want to be an inconvenience to you. Your girlfriend thinks her emotions are burdening you. Get your fucking head out of your ass. Either you apologize to her, or she’s breaking up with you.”

You and Kaz are both left standing still, both watching as Jesper stalks back toward the door, opening it and slamming it shut.

The sound echoes through the silent room.

You don’t know what to say. Part of you feels vindicated, Jesper did the hard part for you, but part of you feels guilty- Jesper also made it a lot bigger than it could’ve been.

You let the guilt win out.

“I’m sorry, Jes’s wording was a bit harsh, I’ll take my leave, it’s really not that big-”

“Stay,” Kaz interrupts. “Please.”

You sit down on the chair next to his, and he turns to you, pulling out gauze and alcohol wipes.

“I can do it myself,” you say hurriedly. “I know-”

“You’re not a burden to me.” He avoids your gaze, he doesn’t want to see your reaction, in case he really would lose you after this. “Let me help you.”

“Okay.”

You hiss through your teeth as he cleans the gash, a small “sorry” escaping him as he continues. There’s still a silence hanging between both of you. He wraps it carefully, looking up at you when he’s done.

“Not too tight?”

“No,” you answer quietly. “Thank you, Kaz.”

There’s another silence between you.

“I care about you,” he says suddenly. “I wouldn’t trade your safety for anything.”

You know it’s his way of saying sorry.

“It’s okay,” you give a reassuring smile. “I know. I’ve just had a bad day, that’s all.”

“It’s not,” he argues. “If you ever need to defend yourself, use my name if it’ll get them to stop. I don’t care if it paints whatever sized target on my back.” You open your mouth to interject, but he continues. “I’m already a wanted criminal in Ketterdam. However much you increase the target by doesn’t matter, so long as you come home alright.”

“Okay,” you nod. “I will.”

“I love you, darling.”

Your eyes widen at his words. He doesn’t say it often, he knows that you already know that.

Jesper must’ve really shaken him.

“I love you too,” you reply softly. “Thank you.”

It’s his turn to look surprised. “For?”

“For caring,” you respond. “For being you. For loving me.”

A faint smile etches on his lips. “I always will.”

[free-pool-trash]

dancing with our hands tied - peter maximoff

here it is you guys... the ✨very spicy✨ sequel to delicate which can be read here <3 (had to keep the rep song title theme going here)

please for the love of god let me know how this is I’ve never written smut before so please go crazy with the asks/comments/reblogs on this one I’d really appreciate it😩😓

word count: 4k 😳 (it’s not all smut dont get too excited)

warnings: +18 content, sexy times, unprotected wrap it before you tap it, swearing, i tried to keep vulgarity on a low level but i decided to just commit towards the end lmao, insinuation to sex from the beginning , some fluff and a tiny bit of angst sprinkled in there too, wandavision spoilers

You can definitely read this as a stand alone but it’ll make more sense if you read delicate first !! enjoy <3

masterlist

The days you spent in WestView had been tiring. Wanda seemed to be losing her composure with each day that passed, you watched how she became more and more skeptical of Peter and found yourself growing all the more anxious with the situation you’d run head first into. But, you were with Peter, your mind and his mind were free of Wanda’s influence and she’d been kind enough to appoint the pair of you your own house in the neighbourhood, a few doors down from her own, so, you couldn’t complain too much.

Today was a relatively quiet day, but you had a feeling that just meant you were in the calm before the storm. Tonight was, apparently, Halloween. Despite the fact that it was nowhere near October, you were more than happy to play along with Wanda’s over the top festivities.

Peter and Tommy had just zoomed into your and Peter’s bedroom, sporting matching outfits and excited expressions as they looked at you expectantly, “Well? What’d ya think?” Peter asked, motioning between himself and Tommy. The littlest speedster awaited your answer with wide, hopeful eyes, wanting validation from his cool uncle’s even cooler ‘friend’.

Yeah, you’d made out on Wanda’s couch but you still hadn’t addressed the question of where exactly your relationship stood. It felt as though the pair of you were both actively avoiding the awkward conversation, opting instead to simply fall into bed together every single night and completely disregard the boundaries of friendship in favour of hearing each other moaning until the early hours of the morning.

With a smile you let out a low whistle, “Looking good boys. I gotta say, Tommy, I think you’re outshining your uncle right now.”

You had to laugh when Tommy smirked triumphantly at Peter, “I told you she liked me more than you.” He boasted proudly and your laughs grew louder when Peter huffed angrily. He crossed his arms over his chest and jutted his bottom lip out childishly.

“Y/n, tell him you like me more.” Peter demanded, again, childishly.

You only grinned, “No comment.” You told him airily, making your way to your closet and hesitantly pulling out the latex costume Wanda created for you off of the rail, holding it by the hanger skeptically.

It was Peter’s turn to let out a whistle when his eyes scanned the skimpy looking leotard suspended by the hanger. The fabric mimicked the design of Peter and Tommy’s outfits although it seemed Wanda had gone out of her way to make yours ever so slightly sexier. The leotard was strapless with a sweetheart neckline and a silver lightning bolt ran through the light blue material. The only saving grace was the silver tights that hung from the hanger as well, at least you’d have some kind coverage. With one last peek into the closet, your eyes landed on a pair of white, knee high gogo boots.

“Christ…” You muttered, eyebrows furrowing at the thought of wearing the ensemble out in public, if it was cold tonight Wanda would be in for an aggressive telling off. With a deep sigh you turned to the two speedsters who were both staring at you, waiting for you to say something. “I guess we’re all gonna be matching tonight.”

“Sweet!” Tommy exclaimed while Peter only smirked. Peter, with a lot of effort, moved his attention from your costume to his nephew.

“Why don’t you go hang out with your brother for a while? I gotta talk to Y/n for a sec.” Tommy welcomed the suggestion, only nodding his head before he had sped out of your house and back to his own.

A gust of wind hit your face as Peter sped himself in front of you, the man didn’t hide his intentions as he gripped your hips and pulled you flush against him. Swaying his body against yours and bringing his lips to the exposed skin of your neck. He trailed his lips up your neck, sucking and nipping, smirking when you let out small noises of approval. When his lips reached the spot behind your ear, he gave a final, harsh suck which had your breath hitching and whining when he pulled away.

To be honest, you’d love to be able to call him your boyfriend and be certain that he thought of you as his girlfriend, but at the moment you were perfectly happy with whatever the fuck the two of you had going on if it meant you could keep feeling him against you like this.

“I cannot wait to see you wearing that.” He all but groaned against your ear, his voice deep and gravelly. The butterflies in your stomach went feral at his words and you had to pull your bottom lip between your teeth to keep from letting out a moan from his tone of voice alone, not to mention the fact that his crotch was pressed up against yours, he was excited to say the least.

Your hands slid up his chest and settled on either side of Peter’s neck, you gently pulled his head out from the crook of your nape and teasingly raised an eyebrow at him, “Maybe later I’ll let you help me get out of it.”

A wicked grin spread across his lips, he squeezed your hips in response, tugging you into him even further for some kind of relief then pressed his lips to yours briefly, murmuring against them, “That’s definitely a plan I can get behind.”

Giving him one last kiss, you pried his hands from your hips and pushed him away, “Alright, get lost I need to get ready.”

“Meet me at Wanda’s?” You nodded at his question, letting out a deep sigh you hadn’t noticed you’d been holding when he finally sped out of the room.

After a second of cooling down, you pulled on the outfit and you’d be the first to admit; Wanda knew what she was doing with this one. You looked incredible, albeit a little stupid in the costume, but still incredible.

When you made your way over to Wanda’s to meet up with the others, you let out a laugh seeing as Wanda was essentially wearing the same outfit as you, only with the added extras of a cape and gloves.

“Hey! Why are you dressed the same as Uncle P and Tommy?” Billy asked you curiously, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he glanced between you and Peter for answers. The speedster in question was smirking proudly, his arm finding a spot wrapped around your shoulder.

“Because she’s totally obsessed with me.” He lied with an over dramatic sigh, causing Tommy to laugh.

You rolled your eyes, elbowing him in the ribs playfully before focusing your attention onto Wanda, “I think it’s safe to say that Wanda and I will be winning best couples costume.” Wanda gave you a knowing grin and a not at all subtle wink in response to your statement.

“Only the best for the best.” She replied, walking forward and linking her arm with yours, stealing you away from Peter who whined in protest, “Oh hush, you can have her back later.”

Telepathy definitely had its perks, one of those perks being you could tell there was more to Wanda than just being an evil puppeteer. The two of you got along extremely well, you were actually growing to see her as a friend. It helped that you knew her story, though. You sympathised with her, knowing full well that if you lost the love of your life you’d probably create a false reality to be with him too. You’d already followed him into a fake reality so you supposed it wasn’t really too much of a stretch to imagine yourself in Wanda’s position.

As the night went on, yourself, Wanda and Peter were sitting around in town square, the twins having run off somewhere. Tensions were high between the interreality siblings at the minute, Peter seemed to be having the time of his life getting on Wanda’s last nerve, poking and prodding at her lifestyle choices.

“Lay off, Pete.” You warned quietly, your stare serious as you felt Wanda becoming impatient with the mutant. Your breathing stopped for a moment and you let put a horrified gasp, your hand clapped over your mouth as you stared at the image in front of you.

Peter’s skin was grey, his eyes were milky and he was littered in what you could only assume to be bullet holes- he was dead- no, you realised as you caught Wanda’s pained expression, he was Pietro.

Wanda regained her composure after a few seconds but the sight of Peter dead was enough to shake you to your very core and you found yourself shaking where you stood.

You didn’t even have a chance to regain your composure before shit had hit the fan. It had happened in a blur, Billy and Tommy were frantic and worried about Vision being in trouble and next thing you knew Wanda was sending Peter flying with a ball of energy after he made a smartass comment about Vision not dying twice.

Quickly, you ran to Peter’s side, he was groaning in pain and looking up at you through squinted eyes, “What the hell was that all about?” He grumbled, hiding his head in your lap when you got down on your knees beside him.

With a sigh you let your body fold against his, wrapping your arms around him and letting your head rest against his shoulder, the image of him bleeding out still too fresh and real in your mind. You could berate him for his brash behaviour another time, for now though; you just needed him close.

“Come on, dumbass. Let’s get you home before you decide to cause more trouble.” You mumbled, pulling him up with you. Ignoring his whining while you led him home, your arm remained firmly around his waist the whole way despite the fact he’d recovered from the blast Wanda dealt him after only a few minutes.

When you got back to the house that Wanda had deemed yours upon your arrival, you finally allowed yourself to breathe. Peter was staring at you with a guilty expression as you released a heavy breath through your nose and shuffled into the kitchen, the heels of your boots scraping on the hardwood as you walked.

Like a lost puppy, Peter followed you. Once he reached you lent against the sink he wrapped his arms around you from behind. He knew you weren’t angry at him by the way your arms immediately moved to grip his and tug them tighter around you.

“You know, her real twin- Pietro… he died,” Peter’s face contorted in confusion when you began to speak, he listened with concern as he could already hear your voice beginning to shake, absentmindedly he caught himself tucking you closer against his chest. “For a second… you must have said something that hit a nerve but for a few seconds…” Your voice hitched and you shook your head in an attempt to knock the image out of your mind, though you had a feeling it would haunt you for as long as you lived. When Peter noticed you’d started chewing at your bottom lip, as you always did when something was causing you anxiety, he gently turned you around in his arms so that he could look at you, his arms remaining firmly around you, yours finding a place resting against his chest.

“What happened, sweetheart?” He cooed, his eyes very much alive and staring into yours.

Swallowing thickly you answered, “You looked like him. You were dead.” You told him quietly and he was sure the look of grief on your face, brought on by the thought of him dying, would haunt him for a lifetime.

Your eyes watered as you took in his face. Scanning every part of it, his brown eyes that made you melt, the dimples that could still be faintly seen even when he wasn’t smiling, the lips that took up the vast majority of your thoughts and that tiny furrow between his brows as he looked down at you with worry.

You loved him.

Of course, you’d known this for years. But you needed him to know, and even though you were already well aware the overwhelming feeling is mutual, you needed to hear him say it.

His thumb running under your eye pulled you from your thoughts, “I’m not going anywhere, baby.” He whispered softly, his hand cupping your cheek as his thumb ran back and forth over your cheek bone. Your stomach flipped at the pet name and you nuzzled against his touch.

“Good. I don’t want to lose you ever again.” You confessed, looking up at him through your lashes fondly as his lips formed an almost sad smile.

Gently, he brought his lips down to meet yours, pouring his heart into the kiss, hoping it would make up for the turmoil he felt responsible for causing you. Too soon, he pulled away.

“Believe me, I’m never leaving your side. I mean come on, I’m without you for like three days and I end up being mind controlled by my sister who isn’t even my sister.” He chuckled out, a grin growing on his face as you began to smile too. He let his eyes close blissfully when you brushed your nose against his, a toothy smile on your face.

“You, Peter Maximoff, are completely hopeless.” You whispered through your smile as he opened his eyes to look at you. His own face sporting an adoring smile.

Your heart skipped a beat the second his next words passed through his smiling lips, “Without you, Y/n L/n, yes I am.” Within a second your arms were around his shoulders and your lips were moving frantically against his. Peter’s hands wasted no time in sliding down to your thighs, gripping them and propping you up onto the kitchen counter.

Your legs automatically wrapped around his waist and your hands got lost in his hair, keeping him as close as humanly possible while his lips migrated to your jaw.

An appreciative hum left your throat as he lapped at the underside of your jaw, leaving a mark before trailing his lips back to your mouth. His tongue licked at your bottom lip as he kissed you, moving it into your mouth the first chance he got. Peter moaned into your mouth when you gave his tongue a light suck.

You grinned at the sound and leaned your weight forward so you were primarily resting against his body, your arms and legs wrapped tightly around his body, your ass barely resting on the counter by that point. Welcoming your movements, Peter’s hands glided up from your thighs to grip your ass and pull you from the counter completely.

He carried you clumsily through the halls of the house, bumping into furniture and pausing to press your body against walls, his eyes closed and lips never separating from yours. You were about a foot away from the stairs when you felt your back make contact with the plaster behind you, your chest heaving when Peter abandoned your lips in favour of littering wet kisses across your chest, no doubt leaving a trail of hickeys in his wake.

You let your head fall back against the wall, enjoying the sensation of Peter nipping and licking at your skin, the man diving back to your neck as soon as he realised that your head thrown back made it entirely exposed to him. You released a breathy moan when his lips ghosted over a sensitive patch of skin, he moved his tongue frantically and you shuddered at the feeling of his hot breath hitting your bruised skin.

“Peter…” You whined when he pushed his crotch up against yours, pressing you further into the wall smirking against your neck when you called his name.

“Yes?” He asked teasingly, rutting his hips against yours once more, deliberately attempting to pull another moan from you, he obviously succeeded. His smirk broadened when you let out a huff and tugged his hair so he’d look at you.

Peter swore he was in heaven when his eyes met yours again, your face was red and your eyes were half-lidded, pupils blown wide with lust as your chest heaved. He could’ve exploded on the spot when you tugged your bottom lip between your teeth and looked at him innocently, all the while grinding your hips slowly and firmly against his. Peter clenched his jaw and let his eyes fall shut, his hands gripping your hips so tightly that you were pretty certain the area would have bruises come tomorrow. You were struggling to care about that though, focusing your energy on the man who had you pinned against the wall.

You brought your lips to Peter’s neck, repaying the favour, not detaching until you left a dark, albeit small, purple bruise on the underside of his jaw. Deciding to prolong the teasing for a little while longer you moved your lips up and let them hover by his ear and you began to let out soft little moans in response to his grinding, the action caused Peter’s movements to become more frantic and your lips to form in a smirk as you felt him hardening against you.

His breath was laboured when he murmured, “Let’s take this upstairs, yeah?” Before you could even answer he had sped the pair of you to the bedroom and you let your feet return to the floor.

As he stood in front of you, you took him in, swollen lips and Halloween hair completely tossed, not to mention the tent in his trousers that was very visible despite the layers of his costume. When your bodies collided again, it was a frenzy of hands, the both of you practically tearing the fabric off the other until you were in nothing but your underwear, kissing sloppily and stumbling towards the bed.

Peter’s lips attached to your chest again the second your back hit the mattress. He groped at your right breast while his tongue sucked on the other, swapping over before you pulled him back up to you.

The way he slotted between your legs and how his forehead rested on yours felt so perfect, you couldn’t help but grin.

“You’re gorgeous, sweetheart.” He muttered between kisses against your lips, his hands kneading your breasts as he did.

You were practically dripping by the time his hand slid down your stomach and under the band of your underwear. For someone with super speed he was moving agonisingly slow at the moment, his hand rubbing languidly over your wet core while he swallowed your moans.

“Fuck- God, Peter please.” You whined, your hips bucking into his hand, desperate for more friction than he was giving you.

The sound of your voice, so needy for him, was all he needed before he was pulling your underwear off, tossing the thin material over his shoulder haphazardly and shimmying out of his own boxers, clumsily kicking them away from his ankles, earning a giggle from you.

When he kneeled on the bed between your bent and separated knees you sat yourself up, sliding one hand up his bare chest and resting it against his shoulder while the other slid downward, only stopping once it was wrapped around his shaft. Peter sucked in a harsh breath when your began pumping him softly, the man completely losing it when your thumb swiped over his tip collecting the precum that had gathered and using it to wet the length of his dick as you continued to fuck him with your hand.

As much as Peter was loving the image and feeling of you jacking him off, he knew if you carried on he wouldn’t be able to last much longer. Still, he didn’t have the heart to pull your hand away when you were making him feel so good. His head found it’s favourite spot in the crook of your neck and he groaned out against the skin that was littered with little purple and red marks from his earlier work, which he’d be sure to admire later, “Shit, Y/n-“ He croaked through a moan, hands gripping your hips as he fought the urge he had to thrust into your hand, “M’not gonna last much longer if you keep doing that.” He groaned out, almost reluctantly, not truly wanting you to stop while simultaneously craving more.

You stopped your motions at his statement, giggling when he let out a strangled noise of disappointment at the sudden lack of pleasure. Doing the honours, you lined him up with your entrance, letting him take over when his lips connected with yours.

Peter gently pushed you back until your head was resting against your pillow and your back was flush with the mattress. His lips continued to mesh with yours as he pushed into you inch by inch until he bottomed out. The deep groan he released was music to your ears and your hands gripped his biceps when he began to thrust in and out.

A symphony of moans filled the room as Peter had managed to set a steady pace, trying his best not to let his mutation get the best of him, as much as he wanted to just go to town he was determined to make you feel as good as you made him feel and judging by the way your head was thrown back and his name fell from your lips like a prayer; he guessed he was doing an okay job.

In only a few minutes Peter had you gasping and clutching onto him like your life depended on it as he picked up speed, one of his hands reaching down between your bodies to rub your clit, his hips snapping against yours. Soon enough, you felt the pressure in your stomach release, your walls clenching around Peter’s dick as your back arched and you released around him. After only a few more staggered strokes, Peter moaned your name against your lips, finishing inside of you and thrusting lazily, riding out his high and subsequently helping you ride out yours.

You let out a blissful sigh when Peter pulled out and rolled over to lay on his back beside you, his chest heavy and his blonde hair sticking slightly against his forehead.

“That- that was awesome.” He mumbled, intertwining his fingers with yours, holding your hand by his side.

Over the last couple of nights you and Peter had, admittedly, ended up in a similar position but neither of you intended for it to happen. It’d usually start off innocently enough, with cuddling or just talking and then one of you would move in just that little bit closer and things would escalate. But there was something about this time that felt a lot more emotional than the few times before. “It was.” You agreed with an airy giggle, squeezing his hand affectionately.

A gust of air shook you from your haze. Peter had taken it upon himself to clean up the mess the pair of you had left between your legs, a pair of his boxers and one of his t-shirts now adorned your body matching him as he wore the same.

He was on his side facing you, his arms holding you against his chest securely the same way they had the night you’d shown up in WestView and urged him to kiss you. When he took you in, he kicked himself for missing out on so much of you for so long.

He was certain, one of these days he’d actually speak the three words that followed him around whenever he thought about you, but as he watched your eyes flutter closed, he decided the words would be best spoken some other time. He was well aware you already knew, just as he was well aware that you loved him, it needed to be said. Eventually, but not quite yet.

[teawithkpop]

[M] - PhysCom - Pt 7

pt 1 - pt 2 - pt 3 - bc 1 - pt 4 - pt 5 - pt 6 - pt 7

Pairing: BTS - OT7 x Reader

Rating: Mature [18+]

Length: 5.4k words

Genre: PhysCom AU - smut with dashes of angst, and a shitload of romance and complicated feelings,, uhuhu (porn with plot??)

Warnings: swearing, a lot of emotional turmoil, talk of pregnancy scares (birth control, contraceptives, etc.), implied discrimination towards sex workers (not by any of the boys dw), mentions of sexual acts

slowly hands you a cake that says "I haven't updated this fic in 14 months and I don't know when the next part is coming but here's an update thanks for being patient" in comic sans

-------

The rush to the hospital goes by in a blur of tears and shouting and panic and questions that you can't bring yourself to answer. The only constant is Min Yoongi's hand, firmly locked in your own throughout the ordeal, tethering you to reality.

You now sit in a private room on a sterile medical table and wait to be seen, too numb inside to feel the sting of the cold metal as it cuts into the backs of your thighs. Yoongi stands beside you, still holding your hand, his fingers are laced through yours and squeezing as if it could sap away the fear that eats away your insides, leaving you hollow and empty.

"It'll be alright. Don't worry about a damn thing, okay?" He shifts his weight anxiously, betraying his own underlying worries.

You barely remember him throwing his jacket over you before being rushed out of the house, and you don't feel deserving of the modest coverage. Though the leather is worn and soft against your skin, all you can feel is the harsh metallic zipper, scratching at your chest as though reminding you of your wrongdoings.

"Yoongi…" you start to say, but he cuts you off, his voice a hoarse whisper.

"Don't you fucking dare. Don't apologize."

You feel tears well up in your eyes. Your chest grows tight with the words he's forbidden you to say.

"I've already called Namjoon, it'll all be fine. Don't worry." He works his jaw and rubs your hand with surprising tenderness, glancing to the little window in the door every other second.

He's been assuring you with those same words for the past half hour, but it feels like it's been an eternity. As you glance at the clock on the wall, watching the hands tick by, you imagine a scene like that of a health documentary. Tiny sperm, swimming up your insides… fertilizing your previously dormant eggs.

Fuck. You've fucked up.

You might be pregnant with Min Yoongi's child. Your Opticon birth control implant could send you into toxic shock at any moment.

You don't see how things can get much worse than this.

The door finally opens, and what appears to be a nurse steps inside. She holds a clipboard, and examines it while she lets the door close behind her. "Let's see now, Miss..." Her shoulders slump marginally as her eyes reach your name. "Oh, right. The PhysCom."

You don't have the energy to ignore the change in her tone from friendly to disinterested, and simply nod. However, you feel Yoongi stiffen beside you.

The nurse lets out a brief sigh and dons a professional expression. "So, what appears to be the problem?" She directs the question to Yoongi.

"We think her birth control implant isn't working." Yoongi explains, his eyes darting furtively between you and the nurse. "She, um… she reached orgasm."

You flush at the memory, ashamed of your failure to adhere to even the most basic of rules set before you.

The nurse makes a noncommittal noise and jots something down. "Says here it’s an Opticon. And you didn't turn it off, sir?"

He shakes his head.

The nurse touches the end of her pen to her mouth, a note of sympathy forming in her eyes. Not for you, but for Yoongi. "How long have you had her?"

"Excuse me?" Yoongi raises an eyebrow.

The nurse tucks the clipboard under her arm, giving him a weary, patient smile. “With PhysComs, we have a list of probable scenarios we’re supposed to check for, to better inform the doctor of the situation, and speed along the treatment process.”

She barely spares you a glance before returning her attention to Yoongi, her voice lowered just a fraction. “It’s not uncommon for newly hired female PhysComs to try and… well, intentionally get pregnant from their clients. Especially if those clients have any amount of wealth or status.”

Yoongi seems lost for words.

She nods as if to agree with his surprise. “It’s some psychosis associated with the job,” she says with a shrug, then straightens her posture once more. “So has she been acting strangely at all? What are her symptoms?”

Your ears burn a bit at being talked about like you’re not in the room, but this isn’t the first time you’ve been in such a position. Oftentimes checkups during training were the same way, the physicians would speak exclusively among themselves and Madame while they examined every inch of you, inside and out.

Yoongi, however, is not used to such an experience.

“Why don’t you ask her yourself?” He says, in a voice much calmer than you would have expected. But one glance at his face tells you all you need to know. His eyes are burning like hot coals. Molten and dangerous.

The nurse doesn’t pick up on his irritation, and busily flips through the pages on her clipboard. “I need reliable information, sir. If you please,” she prompts him.

You can feel Yoongi’s hand clench around yours, and you turn to quiet him.

“It’s okay,” you murmur, hoping to reassure him enough so he’ll talk to her, but he stands his ground, his eyes glued on the nurse.

“Get out,” Yoongi says.

The nurse does a double take. “Excuse me, sir?”

“I said get the fuck out of here.” He points to the door. “Send us someone who will actually help.”

She fumes silently for a moment, but decides not to argue with him, and heads for the door in a huff.

Yoongi scoffs as you two are left alone once more. “What the fuck kind of bedside manner was that supposed to be?” He mutters, staring at the door.

“It’s okay.” You place a hand on his arm.

“No, it’s not.” He’s adamant, and you sigh wearily. How do you explain that this is only what can be expected?

You pick out a few haphazard words from the maelstrom in your brain, too tired to find the best phrasing. “Medical personnel… they don’t really get it.”

“Get what?” He asks, turning to you in outrage. “Being a fucking decent human being?”

You flinch, withdrawing your hand. You’re too tired to try and get your point across. But he notices you wilt and immediately comes closer, lowering his voice and placing both his hands on your arms. “I’m sorry,” he murmurs, the edge of anger fading away to gentleness. Kindness. “What do you mean?”

You sigh, looking off to the side. You don’t deserve to have him look at you like that.

You carefully remove his hands, trying to maintain some semblance of a professional distance, even in the face of disaster. “Most hospitals don’t look favorably at PhysComs. We were given a few lectures about it in training. We use up their resources and time that could instead be given to patients who didn’t willingly put themselves at risk.”

You remember how your fellow trainees had reacted after those discussions. Many of them found the treatment to be unfair, but you yourself felt that, in a way, the medical field’s viewpoint was reasonable. Your choices are what landed you here.

“What the- what are you talking about?” He huffs, still seemingly in the dark. “You didn’t ask for this… this scare. It wasn’t your fault.” He tries to meet your eyes, but your gaze is fixed firmly to the linoleum floor.

A mirthless smile paints your lips. “But I chose this life. And these risks along with it.”

Before he can question you further, the door bursts open and Kim Namjoon enters the room, both his dress shirt and his hair are rumpled, and his eyes are frantic. “Sweetheart?” He rushes to your side and crushes you in a hug. “Are you alright?”

You hear Yoongi let out a breath of relief. “She’s okay, for the moment.”

Something about the way Namjoon holds you feels like a lamp being held against your cold skin. You’re too damp inside to light a flame yourself, but his own body warms you from the outside in the meantime. You want to let yourself enjoy it, but the memory of your unresolved questions leaves you limp in his arms, filled with nothing but misery and confusion.

He pulls back after a moment, checking you over for signs of injury. His eyes are wide with concern. “What happened? Tell me everything.”

A flare of shame rises up in you at the notion of telling Namjoon about your rule-breaking and everything that occured since this morning.

Thankfully, Yoongi seems to sense your hesitance, and he fills in most of the pieces for Namjoon. Namjoon’s expression remains stoic as Yoongi recounts what happened - you being brought home unconcious, seducing Yoongi - up until the mention of your orgasm. Namjoon’s jaw slackens slightly at this, and his eyes scan your face, searching for something.

It’s at this moment that the doctor walks in, a different nurse at his side. He’s a slightly older man, a few wrinkles creasing his brow, and a smile that appears kind until it lands on you. His face is then tinged with that same indifference that most medical professionals give you.

You wish it was your usual physician, but since this was an emergency, you didn’t have time to take the trip to your usual practice. Whatever hospital is nearest, that’s what Yoongi had told the driver.

The man turns to Namjoon, who arguably commands more presence than Yoongi, and the kindness returns. “Sorry for the delay. Busy night. From what I understand, your PhysCom has malfunctioned, is that correct?”

“Her Opticon malfunctioned, yes.” Namjoon corrects him. His diplomatic tendencies are a blessing right now. You just want to know if you’re pregnant or not. You want to know if you’re losing your job. You want to go home.

The doctor runs a few physical tests on you, feeling your breasts, peering down your throat, and examining your vaginal canal, checking for any other symptoms of malfunction from your Opticon. “All’s well so far.” He says, pulling his forefingers out of you, snapping off his gloves, and disposing of them. “May I take a look at the ComGear?”

You feel a flash of panic, waking you out of your stupor. Fuck, was it still in the group chat? You pull out the slim device, heart hammering as you check. Nope. Just settings. Thank god.

You hand it over, and then remember with a looming feeling of dread exactly why it might have been left on the settings page...

“You do so much for us, jagiya.” Taehyung keeps his hands braced on your arms, his thumb rubbing gently against your skin. “You’re always there for us. Always giving… Now it’s time for you to receive.”

“I’m sorry! It’s my fault-” Jimin’s eyes fall to your compromising position, Yoongi’s dick still out, your leaking core exposed, and claps a hand over his mouth. He looks like he might cry. “Oh no...”

The pieces fall into place, and there’s no doubt in your mind. They must have switched it off.

But why? Why, why, why…?

The doctor - you’re too frazzled to read his nametag - pulls out a pair of reading glasses and takes a look at your ComGear, poking around the device with his pointer finger. “Hm. Strange.” He squints. “The Opticon does appear to be switched off.”

Namjoon blinks. “That’s impossible.”

“I’m afraid that’s the case.” The doctor shows him the setting, the toggle very much in the off position. Namjoon takes the device and looks at it in shock.

The doctor coughs. “I know that, um… for some individuals, the temptation and the… risk associated with no protection during intercourse can be sexually arousing. It’s not the first time we’ve gotten a case like this.”

He removes his glasses, folding them back into his pocket. “However, I would remind you and anyone else who uses this one’s services that although Physical Companions may be virtually expendable, it can become quite expensive for your own sake to impregnate them on a whim, using and discarding them, what with the standard fees for breaching their contract and-”

“Thank you, Doctor.” Namjoon interrupts him, and you notice the iron grip he now has on Yoongi’s arm. Likely the only thing restraining him from throwing a punch. “We’ll be more careful.” Namjoon glances at you, confusion making a little crease between his brows. “Is there some sort of morning after pill she can take, or…?”

“I’m afraid the lingering effects of the Opticon implant render any outside hormone blockers ineffective.” The doctor says, his smile turning thin. “It’s a bit of a blessing and a curse. The hormone production and ovulation suppressant in the Opticon normally make the chance of fertilization zero percent while in use. After it’s switched off, chances are still fairly low at 30 percent, for up to 24 hours. But the chances of fertilization after taking a morning after pill are significantly lower than that, at only five percent.”

He shrugs. “We’ll just have to wait and see. Chances are, your PhysCom will be right as rain and ready to pleasure clients again in about a week.”

A week.

First a week of suspension on Namjoon’s terms… Now it’s on medical advisement.

“A week? What should we do until then?” Namjoon voices your very thoughts, Yoongi seething silently beside him.

“Well, we won’t have any results until three to five days from now.” The man clarifies. “But I highly recommend you leave the implant switched off and keep her on traditional contraceptives until we know for sure. I strongly recommend utilizing other PhysComs in the meantime, just to be safe.”

You’re finished.

The doctor hands Namjoon a paper bag, most likely containing birth control pills and condoms. “She may be somewhat volatile for the next few days. You can bring her in for another checkup in a week.”

You’re weak.

“Thank you.”

You’re numb.

-------

It was a silent car ride back to the house, and as Namjoon helps you step out of the vehicle, one hand holding yours for stability while the other rests on your lower back, you can’t help feeling utterly useless. Detached from your surroundings.

What’s the point of any of this now? There’s no way they’ll want to use you until this is resolved. You’re of no use to them as a sex toy until at least a week from now, and by then it’ll be far too late to earn their favor back.

“We need to have a meeting. Call the others into the living room.” Namjoon speaks to Yoongi in an undertone, and you feel a small ache of hope. Maybe things will work out if everyone just talks to each other.

But when you enter the house and Namjoon begins to steer you upstairs, you finally find your voice.

“No.” You resist against him, turning around at the base of the stairs. “No, I want to be part of the meeting.”

The surprise quickly fades from his face, instead turning to concern. “You need to rest."

Something about the look on his face, about being told yet again through his actions that this doesn’t concern you, it causes something inside you to snap, your apathy vanishing in the wake of this new beast beginning to rear its ugly head within you.

Your throat closes up and a scream erupts from your aching chest. "You don't know what I need!"

Namjoon matches your desperation with an infuriatingly patient look of sympathy. He approaches you, his hand outstretched, but you stagger back away from him. He smiles sadly and drops his hand. "Stay here. It's what's best for you."

What's best for you.

The words throb in your mind, like the memory of an old wound. They bounce listlessly off the walls of your grandiose prison long after Namjoon shuts the door, sealing you away again.

You don't know what comes over you as you see visions of launching yourself at the door, pounding and scratching at the wood like a wild animal.

You could just open the door and follow him downstairs. Some part of you does register that.

But you want them to hear you. You want them to hear you rip your throat raw as you exorcise your demons.

You blink and you're standing still.

You haven't moved.

Your spacious room feels stifling. Like the walls are closing in on you, suffocating you.

Silken ropes sway in the dusk, catching your eye from beyond the balcony window. Your escape route from earlier that day.

You don't think twice before stuffing a few meager belongings into the long forgotten backpack kicked beneath your bed.

You need to leave this place.

You can't stay here.

-------

It had started drizzling not long after you left the house, and even now as you sit on the damp curbside, waiting for the next bus to take you far away from this place, it strikes you as funny, in a way, that the weather is crying for you, since you can't muster any tears of your own.

It's cold and misty, a foreboding atmosphere, by all accounts. It makes you question if what you're about to do is the right call.

But you shut down the arguments in your head as quickly as they appear.

Second guessing was what had gotten you into this situation. You need to follow your instincts.

And your instincts are telling you to flee.

It won't be so bad, you try to convince yourself. After the first night on the road, you'll eventually find a new town, a new home, a new place for yourself in this fucked up world. You've done it before, you can do it again.

You're considering suitable aliases for your new persona, when you sense another person approaching, their shoes tramping through the wet grass.

You don't look up at them, hoping they'll pass by and leave you alone. But they come to a stop beside you.

You keep your gaze on the road, droplets rippling the puddled potholes.

Then the stranger goes to sit on the curb too, and you can't help but look at them.

You'd recognize those lips anywhere, even beneath a baggy hooded sweatshirt.

"It's a bit late to run errands, don't you think?" Seokjin says, pulling his sleeves down to keep out the chill as he perches beside you.

He glances at you, then looks ahead at the road, the same way you were. You return your gaze forward, too exhausted to make a run for it. Though you don't get the sense that he would chase after you, even if you tried to escape.

Maybe that's exactly why you decide to stay put, but you don't give the suspicion any more thought.

"What do you want?" You finally ask, your voice croaky from being silent for so long.

"Nothing."

"Liar," you mutter, hugging your knees to your chest. "Everyone wants something."

He chuckles. Rests back on his hands. "I guess you're right about that."

Damn right you are. You didn't study the human condition through your years of training to be fooled so easily by pretty words.

"So?" You prompt him, still staring at the dreary horizon.

He takes a moment to respond. The silence is punctuated by the distant noises of traffic, an occasional car passing by, its headlights shimmering in the mist before disappearing down the road.

“The others are all out looking for you, you know,” he says simply. “Why do you think that is?”

If it were anyone else that had run away - their manager, a friend - you know what the answer would be. Because they care about that person. But how can you believe that about yourself, when you know you can never amount to anyone with that level of importance to them?

Ironic, since you’re the person with which they can be most intimate and vulnerable.

“I’m a liability,” you reply halfheartedly.

His silence serves to confirm your suspicions. A runaway PhysCom? Far too risky for a group at their level. You could become one of those anonymous sources like you saw in the news. A firsthand account of the BTS members’ secret sexual urges. Unacceptable. Snatches of words from the NDA you signed buzz around the edges of your mind like stray flies.

But since you're no longer connected to your network, then your tracker is probably disconnected. If the bus had come just a little earlier, you might already have escaped without a trace.

“You really think that’s the only reason?” Seokjin’s voice pulls you back to the moment.

His abysmal attempt to divert from the problem gets a hollow laugh out of you.

“Any other reason has ulterior motives. It’s just business.” You check the time on your ComGear. The bus should be here any minute. “I’m leaving, and I won’t let you stop me.”

“I don’t intend to,” he agrees, to your surprise. “God knows you’ve been put through enough.” He then leans forward, resting his forearms across his legs. “But for what it’s worth, you deserve to know the truth.”

Your ears perk up at this.

Seokjin seems to take your silence as permission to continue. “The reason we decided to suspend you. It wasn’t… entirely selfless.”

You purse your lips in irritation and fix your gaze upon the horizon, settling your chin beneath your crossed arms. “Right. Ulterior motives, like I said.”

He clicks his tongue. “Touche.”

You wait for him to continue, but he doesn't.

Your curiosity gets the better of you.

“So, what… were you planning to replace me?” You ask, trying to sound contemptuous. “I heard you all having your little group meeting in the kitchen. There are plenty of shiny new whores at your disposal, take your pick.”

He still makes no noise.

You wait, preparing to accept a bitter confirmation of all your fears.

But then he finds his voice. “We could never replace you, dear.”

You stop. Look over at him. His eyes are half lidded, his smile bittersweet as he stares off into the distance. After a few moments, he fishes around in his pocket and pulls something out, then hands it to you.

His smartphone.

“Here,” he murmurs, sympathy in the quirk of his lips. “In case you need to call anyone. Those devices they give you don’t have a cell plan, I assume.”

He seems to sense your wariness, and waves the phone a bit in a gesture of insistence. “I can buy a dozen new ones. It’s no trouble.”

You very hesitantly take it. “Thanks.”

Of course, he has no way to know that your ComGear is now jailbroken, for all intents and purposes. But… is this a trap? What if there’s a tracker in the phone? But why would he need to put a tracker in it if he doesn’t know your ComGear is off the grid?

The rumble of an approaching motor pulls you out of your cyclical thoughts, and you get on your feet, slowly coming out of your dissociative sulk.

But you still feel numb. Nothing matters anymore.

Nothing at all.

Jin gets up along with you, slipping his hands into his hoodie pocket. “Stay safe, alright?”

You give a brief nod of acknowledgment, only half in his direction as you shrug your bag onto your shoulder more securely. The hydraulics of the bus screech as the vehicle comes to a stop and lowers slightly, allowing you to step onboard.

You glance back, fully expecting Jin to stop you. But he doesn’t. He blinks raindrops out of his eyes while you board, and gives you a small smile once the doors close behind you. He lifts a hand in farewell, then turns and starts to walk away down the street.

He’s really letting you go.

You pay your fare and find a seat towards the back of the nearly empty bus. Rain pelts at the windows, picking up in earnest, and it feels like yet another layer, another barrier, separating yourself and creating an ever-growing chasm from the life you knew up until yesterday.

You pull out Jin’s phone, staring at the dark screen and wiping away stray raindrops from the surface with your sleeve. Why had he come to find you, if not to stop you?

“But for what it’s worth, you deserve to know the truth.”

Maybe he felt guilty. Or remorseful for the hell you’ve been put through recently. You would normally have felt immense satisfaction at such a thought.

But you can’t feel much of anything right now.

You don’t think you’ll be able to feel properly again. At least not for a long, long time…

Hm? The screen lit up. You must have pressed a button by accident. You swipe at it again, and to your surprise it unlocks. Who doesn’t put a passcode on their phone?

Is it possible… he disabled it before he gave it to you? Maybe. Whatever. You’re so tired of thinking, playing investigator and second guessing people’s motivations.

You scroll over to the phone icon, and tap on it, briefly considering calling your parents. But the wetness on your fingers messes with the touchscreen and you open the messages app instead.

You’re about to wipe the screen and try again, but… the most recent messages are… all about you. You tap on the group chat among the seven of them, currently bustling with activity.

[ Kim Namjoon ]: has anyone found her [ Park Jimin ]: hyung I’m so sorry [ Park Jimin ]: it’s all my fault [ Min Yoongi ]: she’s not at the studio [ Kim Namjoon ]: we’ll talk about it later Jimin [ Kim Namjoon ]: everyone keep looking [Jeon Jungkook]: manager said they can call her network to track her down [Kim Taehyung ]: should we do that? [ Jung Hoseok ]: no! she could get in trouble :( [ Min Yoongi ]: she’s not a stray pet [ Kim Namjoon ]: exactly [ Kim Namjoon ]: we need to keep this quiet for her sake [Kim Taehyung ]: she hasn’t replied to my texts or calls [ Min Yoongi ]: me neither [Jeon Jungkook]: hyung... will she be okay? [ Kim Namjoon ]: everything will be fine don’t worry [ Kim Namjoon ]: we’re going to fix this somehow [ Min Yoongi ]: whatever it takes [ Jung Hoseok ]: where could she have gone... [ Park Jimin ]: what if she doesn’t come back?

You scroll further up, past days and weeks and months of texts between them… not even a day between mentions of you. Wondering if you’re alright. Hoping you’ve eaten enough. Wanting to do more with you.

The thread of texts Jimin sent to Seokjin just yesterday.

Hyung I wish things were different I want to hold her I want to tell her she’s enough I wish I could kiss her… I think I love her Do you ever feel that way?

And Seokjin’s reply.

I do I know just what you mean Why do you think I turned those secondaries away last night, hm? No one can compare She really is special…

He didn’t… fuck the secondaries? After you broke at dinner, he… didn’t...?

You switch to his thread with Namjoon from a few days ago.

I know you’re our leader but I don’t think this is the way to go You need to be more cautious

Namjoon’s reply.

What we need is action, hyung If we work together on this, we could get rid of these unnecessary rules We could all have what we want Including her It’s what’s best for everyone

Seokjin took several minutes to reply.

You’re going to lose her.

Jin knew. He tried to talk Namjoon out of writing that stupid essay, or maybe it was about your suspension.

Either way, he defended you.

You open his thread with Hoseok. Dimly, you recognize that you shouldn’t be snooping, but you’re too absorbed to stop.

Hyung, I think she really wants this All of us ♡ I don’t know how, but we need to show her that it’s okay That we want it just as much

How do you know that’s what she wants?

I can’t say ♡ But I know now She wouldn’t reject us Our feelings She feels something too

The date and time lines up with this morning. The morning after he made love to you.

He didn’t tell them. He kept your secret.

“Our feelings”? What does he mean? Him, Jimin, Taehyung… Seokjin? Do they all…?

Your head spins, the hollowness of your heart filling with a rush of jumbled emotions, like a tide crashing in. All your numbness is washed out with light, just a pinprick at first, that grows rapidly into a ray of warmth as you consider what all this could mean. The chasm starts to narrow, and you get the urge to jump ship, to turn back and figure this shit out. To know once and for all what they want from you. What you mean to them.

But how can you trust this isn’t a trap? How can you be sure?

The answer is as simple as they come.

You can’t.

You can’t be absolutely certain that their intentions are pure… that this is the right thing to do… that you won’t be hurt again.

But maybe... trust isn’t about being infallible. Being right. Being sure.

Maybe it’s built on what ifs. On trying again, even with no guarantees.

Guarantees are only as good as their word, and talk is cheap. Lies are easy. Your Opticon had a 100% guarantee, and look where that got you.

But you remember the way Hoseok held you that night, and made love to you like you’ve never felt in your life... When Jimin kissed his way down your body, with only the best of intentions. Namjoon’s strong arms embracing you when you felt powerless. Yoongi’s hand never leaving yours, even while you waited in the hospital. Jungkook carrying you home after you fainted, breaking your door to make sure you were safe in bed. The look in Taehyung’s eyes when he finally kissed you, breaking the ice you’d been growing around your heart.

How Seokjin let you go.

Maybe...

You get up with a start, rush to the front of the bus, and hastily ask the driver to let you off, much to the old man’s disgruntlement, but the moment the doors whoosh open, you take off at a run.

You want to go home.

You want to try again.

No matter how much you try to bury it, to forget the way they make you feel, you care about them. All of them. On a much deeper level than that of a PhysCom and client. And it scares you.

But you’re done running from fear. From uncertainty.

Now you’re running towards it willingly, as you give chase down the torrential streets, searching for that familiar hooded figure and hoping you’re not too late. You’re embracing the doubt, the fear, the uncertainty, the paranoia... letting their shadowy claws sink into you until they can’t hurt you anymore. Until they fade away, cowering under the glow of your determination.

You’re setting some new rules for yourself, no longer letting fear control your thoughts and actions, barring you from any chance of happiness.

You see Seokjin in the distance, trudging home through the pouring rain. You run faster.

You’re fucking terrified. But you’ve never felt so free in your life.

“Jin!” You shout to get his attention, still a block away. He turns around, and shakes his head, seemingly confused, but a smile starts to appear. You smile too.

Finally, you catch up to him, and without warning, you throw your arms around his shoulders. Damn, he’s always taller than you remember.

He laughs, shocked by your change of heart. “What are you doing?”

“I want to hear you say it.” You reply, looking up at him as rain dashes down your face. You don’t know when you started crying, but you’re grateful to the weather for masking your tears.

“Say what?” He asks, his hands resting on your waist to support you. Thunder rumbles in the distance, rain sliding down his perfect face.

“How you feel about me.” You reply, studying his eyes. “Be honest.”

He seems to sense the gravity in your words. He holds you closer. His eyes soften.

“I think I’ve fallen in love with you.”

For the first time since all of this started, you sense no deception in his words, no double meaning, no hidden agenda.

Because you aren’t searching for reasons to doubt this time.

You’re searching for reasons to trust, and you find them.

You want to kiss him. So you do.

[tooruluv]

Hajime Iwaizumi x F!Reader

❝ enemies, as well as lovers, come to resemble each other over a period of time ❞

description: your feud with hajime iwaizumi only escalated throughout your years at hogwarts; whether it was on the quidditch field or who would be the first to sit down in class, there always seemed to be some sort of raging competition between you two.  

genre: hogwarts!au, angst, enemies to lovers, slow burn, rivals, gryffindor quidditch keeper iwaizumi, slytherin quidditch captain f!reader

word count: 5.5k

warnings/notes: swearing, lots of angst, small depictions of violence, mentions of alcohol and drinking, not proof read im so sorry although i am an avid believer than both iwa and oikawa would be slytherins, i wanted to play with the idea of them being gryffindors, which actually makes sense when you think hard about it hfklhfd anyway! please enjoy!

part of a hogwarts collab !  collab masterlist posted here ! tysm to the wonderful @rintsuru​ for hosting <3

my general masterlist

You could feel his presence from across the dining hall, immediately dowsing you in a raging hatred that you only reserved for him. His arrogance mocked you as he basically danced into the Great Hall bathed in compliments.

The Gryffindor quidditch team won against Ravenclaw the night before. You didn’t know why he had all of the glory... he wasn’t even the captain. Being keeper had its perks, you guessed.

You rolled your eyes and focused your attention to your food. You tried not to stab the plate as you heard the varying praises to the boy in red and gold. “Congrats, Iwa!” and “That last block was brilliant!” nearly made you want to choke.

Hajime Iwaizumi was simply not someone who deserved such compliments. He was vile, annoying, and did everything in his limited power to poke and prod at every single one of your nerves. You used to ignore your burning hatred that you harbored for him; but late in your second year, you had let it all out.

And, as it turned out, he wasn’t quite fond of you either.

It had been years since then, yet the feelings remained the same. It was just the start of your sixth year and you already wanted to gouge his eyes out with the pointy end of your fork.

Tooru Oikawa caught your gaze and sent you a cheeky smile. You wished that you could hate the captain as much as his keeper, but you only let your hatred for him simmer for so long. He was quite fun when he wasn’t next to the little shit.

“Just wait for next week when you verse Slytherin! You’re sure to win!” a small Gryffindor told them. 

“I wouldn’t be too sure.” You said, perhaps a bit too loudly. You lacked volume control, after all.

“What was that, Slytherin?” Iwaizumi turned to you. His gaze was fire on your skin and you wanted nothing but to catch him aflame as well. 

“Your arrogance and cockiness proceeds even you.” You said, voice monotone and venomous against the recent silence at your speech. “I wouldn’t be too sure of your success.”

“Say that again after the match.” Iwaizumi turned back to accept another compliment and find a place to sit at his house’s table.

You wondered if you would get expelled if an apple happened to launch out of your hands and land on the back of his head.

Late in your second year, you had enough of Hajime Iwaizumi.

The both of you were in a silent competition the minute you were introduced to each other in your first year. It was never anything serious, just two eleven year olds who liked to be at the top.

It wasn’t until your second year that you started to feel genuine distaste for him. You had buried the thought of “hate” for a long time, masking it to be annoyance and opposition. 

The hatred was much deeper than a surface burn.

It was during charms class that you finally snapped. 

It was not more than the simple mutter of his breath. It was a mispronunciation of the spell and the tap of his wand against the table that made you lose your control. 

“Hajime! Can you please, for the love of Merlin, shut the fuck up!” The harsh language created a tense silence through the classroom. No twelve year old had the balls to curse that hard in front of that many people, including a professor. “If you are going to be an idiot, at least try to hide it.”

Hajime Iwaizumi turned in his seat to face you, irritation and vexation easily overpowering his shock. 

“Funny that you’re saying that.” He said.

“You’re so ridiculous.” You rolled your eyes. “Oh, I’m Hajime Iwaizumi and I am a perfect student that can’t even properly pronounce a simple spell! But that doesn’t matter because guess who’s a keeper for the quidditch team when I’m only a second year!! I am perfect!! Literally no one likes you.”

“Trust me, no one likes you either.”

No one meaning, and translating to, I don’t.

Just to show off, you easily cast the charm that he had failed. Charms was your strong subject, so you only needed to say the spell and flick your wand before turning your attention back to him.

He was nearly smoking from his ears, he was both embarrassed and livid.

You waved to Kei Tsukishima as you caught his gaze from the side of the hall. He was a fellow Slytherin and a good friend, though neither of you would admit that to each other.

He nodded as his greeting. He shoved his book back into his bag as you made your way to his side.

“Hey, Tsukki.” You said. “I wasn’t expecting to see you until practice tomorrow.” 

“Yeah, I’m waiting for Yamaguchi.” He turned his body to lean against the wall. “We’re going to Hogsmeade today.”

“No invitation?”

He sighed. “Would you like to join us, Captain?”

“I was joking, no need to sound so enthusiastic.” You chuckled. As you started to speak again, Tadashi Yamaguchi left the classroom the two of you stood outside of. He smiled at you, his green and white reflecting off of his eyes.

“Captain!” Yamaguchi greeted, putting an arm around your shoulder. “Are you coming to Hogsmeade with us?”

“Be careful, the idiots are coming.” Tsukishima interrupted and warned, motioning over your shoulder.

You turned around to find Oikawa and Iwaizumi walking next to each other, laughing about something only the two of them knew. You had to hold back from making a comment.

“Yoohoo!” Tooru Oikawa caught your eye. You sighed and turned back to your fellow Slytherins, sharing a look. 

“Hello, Tooru.” You felt him beside you before you looked. 

You purposely didn’t look at Iwaizumi. 

“We’re celebrating our win tonight, you guys should join!” Oikawa invited. You heard Iwaizumi’s exhale of frustration, but you only rolled your eyes in an attempt to ignore his presence. 

“You want a group of Slytherins hanging out with you, celebrating your win, when we go against you in less than a week?” Tsukishima spoke up. He moved off of the wall. “No thanks. Come, Yamaguchi. Let’s go.”

Yamaguchi waved goodbye and followed his best friend down the hall. You pivoted to fully face the two Gryffindors.

“I’ll come.” You said, mainly out of spite.

Tooru Oikawa was naturally outgoing. He was the captain of the Gryffindor quidditch team, a flirt, and all together a pretty chill person. You didn’t mind calling him a friend, despite the vast differences between you two.

One vast difference being his best friend.

Which is why you found yourself next to him as soon as you entered the Gryffindor party. The cascades of burgundy and gold created a deep atmosphere in the hidden room, lights dancing along the dark walls and the smell of various alcohols filled the air. It was a Gryffindor party, that much was true.

You were one of the very few Slytherins that occupied the room. Your eyes caught sight of only a couple, most of them much younger than you and just happy to be at one of their first few parties.

“Oi, a snake has crawled into the winner’s common room.” Oikawa joked as he handed you a can. You accepted. 

“A snake in a lion’s den, I wonder who will win.” You quipped. 

“The lion, for sure.”

“I wouldn’t be too sure. Snakes can eat things 100 percent their size.” You raised a brow and opened your can. 

“Hm,” Oikawa looked over his shoulder and called out for someone you didn’t see. “Hey! Who do you think would win, a lion or a snake?”

“A lion obviously.” It was Hajime Iwaizumi. 

You let out a groan, immediately losing your sense of humor. “Ah, you’ll see in less than a week.”

“I don’t think I will.” Iwaizumi said, stoic and annoyed. “This win was only one of few.”

“I suggest you just celebrate this win.” You took a sip. “Because I don’t think the losing team would like to come to the winner’s party.”

“That just means I will not be seeing you, which is a grand idea.”

It was the time of year just before winter, where the air starts to cool but the sun still warms your skin. You took a breath and held your broom at your side. 

It was near minutes before the anticipated game against Gryffindor, and you could hear the crowds already. The rivalry between your houses was something that everyone enjoyed; the rivalry between you and their keeper was all you.

“Alright team.” You pivoted to the team behind you. “We’re playing Serpent first; and if we don’t get any points within the first two minutes, I’ll hold up the signal for Green. Got it?”

“Got it.”

You had a pretty well-rounded team in your honest opinion. Tsukishima was perfect as your keeper, he was never one to let anything get past him. Your chasers included you, Yamaguchi, and another girl named Yui Michimiya. You had the Miya twins for beaters. And, rather recently, you gained a new seeker named Tobio Kageyama. The same age as your keeper, but only wanted to join quidditch out of hate for the Gryffindor seeker (and who were you to deny that?).

The Gryffindor team was not one to mess with, they had a nice team too. Iwaizumi as the keeper, the Idiots Nishinoya and Tanaka as beaters, their new seeker Shoyo Hinata... but the problem was their chasers: Oikawa, Kiyoko Shimizu, and Wakatoshi Ushijima. They were so quick on their brooms, it was like working against wind.

Today was no day to lose.

“It’s our first official match of the year.” You encouraged. “Let’s show them who not to mess with.”

“Let’s absolutely destroy them.” Atsumu added.

You grinned.

As you headed towards the field, you could feel the adrenaline creeping into your bones. Quidditch had become routine, simple muscle memory as you moved to your starting positions. 

The Gryffindor team appeared, and you felt the excitement enter you in a rush of air.

In the air, Hajime Iwaizumi felt at peace. He was very good at what he did, and he knew that, and the game was something he was passionate about.

He was also passionate about beating you.

You were the bane of his existence. You had never once sent him anything other than something bitter or sarcastic. You were an annoying pest that he simply couldn’t get rid of.

And as you threw the Quaffle into the goal just above his head, Iwaizumi felt his eye twitch.

Slytherin won, Tobio Kageyama’s hand high with the Snitch inside. 

You watched in triumph as the teams descended on the brooms. From the skies down, you cheered.

“Congrats, Slytherin.” Oikawa said, though his tone was bitter and sour. 

You knew that he hated losing, so you didn’t push it. He was a friend, after all. Sending him just a small “I’m sorry you didn’t win” smile, you headed to your team. You gathered them into a hug, or rather-- a huddle, and ruffled the hair on Kageyama’s head. 

You peeked over your shoulder to catch sight of Iwaizumi. He was standing, hands at his sides, red face and eyes blank of any expression other than anger.

You smirked at him.

Hajime Iwaizumi was on the other side of the victory this time, silently brooding as he picked at his food in the Great Hall. The Gryffindor table emitted zero volume. 

He was pissed off the second you entered the hall, Kei Tsukishima and Tadashi Yamaguchi walking beside you. The green and white seemed to glow, mocking him in the worst way imaginable. 

Oikawa tried to bring his attention back to the food, but Iwaizumi was focused primarily on you. You were gloating, relishing in his loss, taking delight in the compliments from your house. A Hufflepuff appeared at your side, and you smiled as you thanked them for their congratulations. 

He felt sick.

You could not help but drown yourself in the triumph. You walked on air, the feeling of superiority tickling every inch of skin it could touch.

You waved goodbye to a couple of friends, heading directly to the Gryffindor table. You placed your hands on Oikawa and Iwaizumi’s shoulders, leaning to place your head right between theirs.

“I suppose the snake beats the lion.” You sent a wink to Iwaizumi, knowing full well how it would provoke him. 

“Fuck off.” Iwaizumi shoved your hand off of his shoulder.

“Go receive your praise at the Slytherin table.” Oikawa shooed, fork in hand. “You won’t find it here.”

“Sore losers.” You mocked just for fun. You stood straight. “I imagine that I would be the same, given it were the other way.”

You basically skipped back to your table for breakfast.

You were absolutely elated for the rest of the day. It was quite similar to being on cloud 9, winning your first game of the year against your rivals. The look on Hajime Iwaizumi’s face only added to the feeling.

You were walking down the hall, talking to a fellow Slytherin girl who had her arm wrapped in yours. She was going on and on about how she wished she could have imprinted Kageyama’s snitch catch to her memory.

That was when your shoulder collided directly into a firm body.

Your arm was ripped away from your classmates, along with your bag that fell onto the hard ground with a loud thud and wisp of parchment and ink. Everything in your bag now scattered the ground, covered in the dark ink and dirt. 

Your mood was too high to get too angry. It was an accident; you would bite your tongue and clean up the mess.

Until you realized just who’s shoulder you ran into: Hajime Iwaizumi. Your greatest enemy and now destruction of your contents.

“Watch where you’re going next time, Hajime.” You grunted, kneeling to save some of your parchment before the ink could reach it. 

“Perhaps if you had your head out of your ass, you wouldn’t have run into me.” Iwaizumi responded. He had turned to face you midway through your fall.

“As if you didn’t feel this way a week ago.” You told him, standing up. Nearly everything that was in your bag was soaked, including the bag itself. You inhaled deeply. “You did this on purpose, didn’t you?”

“Now, why would I run my shoulder into you on purpose hoping to ruin your mood?” He asked. “You must be very arrogant to think that everything must be about you.”

You clenched your jaw and closed your eyes. “I will not let a piece of shit such as yourself bring my mood down today. Today is a good day.”

You knelt once again to find your essay that you had written for Snape, searching your documents. Only to find it one of the few that were directly under the ink, completely doused in black.

“Actually, fuck you.” You lifted the paper. Ink dripped off and onto the ground. “Do you know how long I worked on this?”

“I don’t know, a couple of minutes?” Iwaizumi shrugged. “You aren’t exactly the best at your schoolwork.”

“You wish you knew me well, but you don’t at all.” You felt anger boil in your chest. “I worked very hard on this essay. Days, even. And you destroyed it in less than five seconds..”

“There’s the Slytherin in you.” He let out a humorless laugh. “You think everything has to be about you, and if it doesn’t than someone is out to get you. Your ego is so fucking enormous that you can’t even muster the idea that maybe something isn’t about you. You didn’t even win, Tobio won the game for you. God, why don’t you go make a friend instead of standing here arguing with me about an accident?”

And then, “You really are a raging bitch, aren’t you?”

The girl that you were talking to had wide eyes, and you were sure that she was ready to fight. A couple of bystanders that were once just listeners started to mumble. And you.... you couldn’t fathom words.

Your feud with him had grown deep, but it had never gone as far as that. In front of a crowd, no less. 

It was one thing to make comments, to be bitter and roll your eyes at each other’s presence. It was one thing to bicker, to fight, to joke to friends about the other’s incompetence and purposely pull on each other’s strings.

It was something else completely to call you a bitch in front of everyone in the middle of a hallway after a thread of insults.

You fake smiled, feeling unwanted tears threaten their way to your eyes. You would not allow yourself the angry tears; they would only make you angrier. 

“You’re more than just an asshole, Hajime Iwaizumi.” You told him. Because you truly didn’t have any words.

“Calling a woman a bitch is the worst insult. Those are fighting words.” Oikawa’s older sister used to say. “It’s comparable to calling a man a pussy.”

Hajime Iwaizumi didn’t think much while he spoke. He just said the things as they came, especially when he didn’t really care much about what you thought of him.

But, calling you a bitch... that felt as if it were crossing a line that he didn’t have the authority to cross. And the look on your face after he said it was one that he had never witnessed on you.

At practice, his head still held the image of you. 

He was confused. Why did he regret calling you a name? It wasn’t as if the two of you don’t argue in front of people all of the time. In fact, it was nearly a common occurrence. 

For some ungodly reason, he felt a tug at his chest. 

“Maybe you should apologize?” Oikawa suggested.

“Why would I apologize to her?”

“Because I think you went a little bit too far.” He told his best friend as truthfully as possible. “Because as much as I think the rivalry between you two is fun, she’s still just a girl. And because my sister said you should.”

“You wrote your sister?”

“Yeah, of course I did.”

For several days, Hajime Iwaizumi hadn’t seen you. You didn’t eat in the Great Hall, you didn’t come to the classes he had with you, you didn’t go to Hogsmeade like you usually did on weekends.

So, he came to your practice.

He was hoping to apologize. It was something he had never done to you before, and he had practiced it quite a few times. Just a small, “I’m sorry for calling you a bitch in front of everyone.”

Yes. That should be fine and the two of you could go back to the regularly scheduled loathing.

But the second he stepped onto the field, the two beaters stood in front of him. 

“I wouldn’t.” Atsumu said, holding his broom. “She’s been in a mood.”

“I know, I’m the reason for that.” Iwaizumi said. “I just want to talk to her. Just a second.”

“I wouldn’t.” Osamu repeated. “Whatever you have to say, it’s gonna have to wait.”

Iwaizumi nodded, looking at the twins. He was going to ask them to tell you that he had been there, ask them to ask you to meet him somewhere or something so he can get the stupid apology off of his chest, when you appeared behind them.

“Get off of my field, Hajime Iwaizumi.” You said. You had been at practice for the past two hours (according to the sign ups), yet your voice was even and you hadn’t even broken a sweat. In fact, your voice spit toxin in his direction.

“I just wanted to...”

You had taken off before he could even say his second word. The twins followed right after.

Tooru Oikawa took a place beside you. It would have been normal, if it were not for your avid avoidance of anyone with a Gryffindor robe on.

“Hello, Tooru.” You said without sparing him a glance.

The thing was, you weren’t angry with him. You didn’t hate Oikawa, you hated his closest friend. And by association, you didn’t want to talk to him just as much. Oikawa had always been the middle ground between the doom and gloom that was the dark haired man you hated.

“I think you should talk to Iwa.” Oikawa said. Plain and simple, to the point.

“I think you should mind your business.” You retorted. “I never talked to him to begin with, what’s different now?”

“Because now is different.” He grabbed his book as the professor walked in. “Now, you won’t even say your smart ass remarks or tell him how fucked up his hair looks. Now is just... boring and sad.”

“So you want me to talk to the guy I hate in order for you to not be bored?” You scoffed and collected your things. “Truly, you are his best friend.”

You left just as the professor started talking, receiving a few stares in the process. It wasn’t as if you weren’t used to that.

You were walking with Tsukishima, laughing at your attempts to get him to smile. Your team had really taken your mind and restored your confidence. You figured, as long as you didn’t see the man you hate then he simply didn’t exist. It was that easy.

Until you accidentally caught his eye across the street. 

It had been snowing, so most of the students were in their winter gear and warm clothes. You yourself had a hat and scarf on, gloves to cover your hands despite the hot to-go mug of cocoa in them. 

Hogsmeade was quite busy with everyone getting last minute holiday gifts and hurrying to hang out before break. Yet, somehow, your eyes found the brown of Iwaizumi’s.

You turned around, forcing Tsukishima to follow. The younger boy didn’t even have to ask about your change in demeanor, easily falling into pace beside you. 

You felt a hand on your wrist, and heard your name being called. “Hey. Can I talk to you? I’ve been trying to apologize...”

You stopped dead in your tracks, as if you were pulled on a leash. As if his bare hand touching your empty gloved one had scolded you. Iwaizumi stood before you, red cheeks from either the cold or from rushing after you. Either way, you wanted nothing to do with it. 

He had spun you in his grasp, his jaw tight and eyes searching yours before falling to his hand around yours. His grip on your wrist was tight, and he swallowed as his eyes found yours again.

“I don’t want to talk to you.” You snatched your arm away. “Have you ever considered that? I don’t want to talk to you, I don’t want to see you, and I don’t want to hear your half-ass apology!”

“I have been trying to talk to you.” He said. “I...” His eyes scanned yours. His tongue rolled in his mouth. “You mean to tell me that you don’t want my apologies?”

“You’ve made it very clear what you think of me, so I hope that I can make this very clear for you,” You took a deep breath. “I hate you. I don’t like you, I have never liked you, and I hope that whatever it is that is eating you up inside continues to do so.”

Hajime Iwaizumi’s eye twitched. He started to take a step towards you, but decided against it, falling back into the same step. “I don’t...” His voice was nothing as you had ever heard it. “You...” His eyes clouded with the emotions you were familiar with. “Fine.”

“Fine.”

It was a sudden realization. It was not something you had even considered before, not something planned or reasoned. It was much like a tsunami, a build up of unrelated activity that brought something else entirely.

Emotions were unfortunate things. If you feel extreme emotions for someone, no matter what... they are still very strong feelings.

Hate to love, what a strange concept.

You held the potion below your nose, inhaling the scent. 

“What does it smell like?” Snape asked.

“It smells like... bergamot.” You distinguished the varying smells. “Apple. And... lavender?”

You stepped back and hoped no one could see you connecting the dots through your eyes.

Tooru Oikawa was an observant person. He was known to be the person who knew the best for his team, easily finding the perfect techniques for each on the field and as encouragement. He was one for connections and relationships.

Which is why he knew that you were masking feelings of something else with this burning hatred. Which is why he knew why you felt so bad after Iwa called you a terrible name in front of an audience. Which is why he knew who it was when you listed your amortentia scents.

He tried to send you a look from his seat across from you, classes later. He wanted to tell you that he knew; that he knew there was something more to what’s going on, and that something was Iwaizumi.

You just sent him a middle finger, knowing full well what he was getting at.

Your feelings didn’t just suddenly arrive. And you were full of confusion, disorientation, and most of all... anger.

For as long as you could remember, Hajime Iwaizumi was supposed to be your arch enemy. He was your nemesis on a daily basis. He was the reason for your annoyance. He was the reason for your hatred for the colors red and gold. He was the reason you became the quidditch captain. He was the reason for the breath leaving your lungs.

And he was the reason for the breath entering.

You were pissed. You were pissed that you had unrealized feelings for the man you were supposed to hate, have hated for years. You were pissed that your love had been in a game of chess, where the only outcome is to win or forfeit. You were pissed that the entire time you had spent a vast majority of your time hating, loathing, rolling your eyes at... the entire time you had a reserved space for hate, when it should have been quite the opposite.

The luck must have been exclusively for someone else, because it seemed as though whoever created you had decided to have a fun game.

You had punched Hajime Iwaizumi once. 

It was something you thought of a lot, and it was the main reason Iwaizumi chose not to test you too closely to that day. 

He was rolling his eyes at something Oikawa was saying when you walked by. You were heading to your quidditch practice, the captain not one for latecomers. And he caught sight of you. He quickly jumped from his spot and stopped you from passing.

“Out of the way, Hajime, I have practice.”

“Oh, right, because you’re on the quidditch team now.”

“I am, thank you very much.” It was the beginning of third year, and you were not only annoyed but you were also a Growing Person going through puberty. You did not have time to deal with a teenage boy pissing you off. “You forget that not everyone got on the team their first year of trying out.”

“Because we’re better than the entire Slytherin team.”

“Talk to me when you win a house cup.” You tried to push past him, but he stood directly in front of you in one step. “Move, or be moved.”

“What are you going to do? Punch me?”

So, you did. Your fist collided with his cheek before you could even register that it had happened. Oikawa gasped out loud, it quickly turning into a laugh. 

“She punched you!” Oikawa laughed, grasping at his sides. “Ah man!”

While Iwaizumi touched his cheek to check that— ah yes, you really did punch him— you were already walking away to the practice field.

Iwaizumi missed you, if he were being fully and completely honest with himself.

He found himself searching for you in classes or in common areas, prepared for your snide remarks and bitter taunts. He found himself waiting for you to roll your eyes at his presence; looking for you to quip about the next quidditch game.

But when none of it came, he felt out of place.

He actually missed your annoyed banter. He missed you shoving your middle finger in his direction. He missed the redness on your cheeks when you would try to calm yourself down. He missed the silence that would escape you if he entered a room and you were anything other than angry.

He missed catching you smiling at someone and watching your face change. He missed the arguments in class. He missed the little comments during eating.

Confused, he pushed those feelings down as he watched you eat with some Ravenclaws and a Hufflepuff that he had never talked to before.

It had been several weeks of silence from your end. You had thrown yourself back into quidditch before the break, happy to have a distraction from whatever the fuck you were feeling. You weren’t going home for the holidays, so you spent some time planning for the spring and classes.

You found yourself outside, sitting in the snow and writing a make up essay for Snape. You had found a nice spot under a roofed area, so nothing smudged your writing (or, you know, covered it completely). 

“Oh.” A voice said from above you.

You looked up to find Iwaizumi, hands in pockets and staring at you as if you had never existed and he was discovering you for the first time.

“I wasn’t expecting to find anyone here.” He said. 

“Yeah, obviously neither was I.” You started to put your things away.

“No... no comment?”

“Hm?”

“No... snarky comment? No you look terrible to me?”

You shook your head. Mainly because you didn’t have the energy. You were content, bored, and just overall exhausted. You had exhausted yourself in thinking of every possible outcome to your love for the man in front of you, none of which made any sense.

None of it made any sense.

It was as if one moment, you were standing on ground. And the next, you were swept away by a giant wave that you thought was only an earthquake. You hated love. 

“Then, can I finally say what I have been meaning to?”

“No.” You finally got the last of your things into your bag. 

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why can’t you just hear me out?” He stood in front of you, hoping to stall your leaving. “I’ve been trying to tell you that I shouldn’t have called you a bitch, and I should have...”

“And I don’t want to hear it.”

You started to leave, but he jogged to jump in front of you again. Through the years, he had gained height compared to you. You weren’t necessarily kids anymore, you weren’t at eye level to just punch him in his cheek without reaching for it. 

“God, you’re fucking annoying.” You shifted your bag on your shoulders. “You want me to call you a name so it can be even? You want me to tell you that everything is fine and we can go back to our constant fighting? What do you fucking want from me?”

“What do I want from you?” He asked, voice rising to match yours. “What do you want from me? I’ve been trying to get your attention for over a fucking month and you have given me every reason to just stop.”

“Then why don’t you!” You dropped your hands. “Why don’t you just leave me the fuck alone?”

“Why?”

“Why what, Hajime?”

“Why?” Iwaizumi let out a small breath, the grey cloud leaving his lungs. “Why won’t you just let me talk to you for five minutes?”

“Because I don’t want to! Because I don’t want to hear you make up excuses. Because I cannot listen to your voice for too long.”

Before you could stop yourself, before you could recognize your own voice, before any thoughts arrived, you said, “Because for some fucked up god awful reason, I’m in love with you!”

Everything froze all at once. The oxygen left your lungs, the snow stopped falling, and everything became so unbearably silent.

You stared at him, regret drenching you in an instant as if the tides of the ocean had rose and fell in one single motion. You couldn’t breathe, your heart seized in your chest and against your ribs. You couldn’t bring yourself to look into his face, fearing to find yourself lost and never found.

He let out a single breath. And you held yours.

fin.

[agent-whiskeys-sweetheart]

Meant To Be (iii)

Pairing: Hotch x F!Reader

Summary: After meeting Garcia you make quick work of helping with the case, desperate to prove yourself to Hotch. Once the two of you help the team wrap everything up it’s time for them to return home. Which also means it’s time for you and Hotch to talk. One on one.

Warnings: Nothing in this chapter.

Word Count: 5,288

A/N: I wanna say I’m super happy you guys are enjoying this series cause honestly I’m having a lot of fun writing it! I love you all dearly. (If you’re just now finding this series, that’s perfectly alright! I’m glad you’re here! Feel free to catch up and enjoy the rest of the story. Here’s a link to Part 1 and Part 2 of Meant To Be.)

The elevator ride to the bottom floor of the building was quick, allowing you to make your way to Garcia’s office in a matter of minutes. There was a plaque up next to the door, indicating that you were in the right place. Taking a moment to steady yourself you exhale before knocking on the door. A voice on the other side tells you to come in so you do. Around you are dozens of impressive looking monitors, all of which are doing something different. On top of the long L-shaped desk there were several small trinkets and toys, bringing a sort of life into the dark room. The woman sitting in front of you spins around in her chair to look at you, a quick flash of confusion on her face. She looks extremely kind and everything about her appearance makes you want to smile. 

“Hello. My name is Y/N L/N. Are you Penelope Garcia?” 

“Yes, I am. What can I do for you?” Once you’re sure you’re in the right place you step forward to shake her hand. She stands so that you are both on the same level now, shifting awkwardly. 

“Sorry to barge in like this. Everything has gone pretty fast this morning. I’m a new agent for the BAU. Today is my first day. The rest of the team just left on a case and SSA Hotchner asked me to stay behind and help from here.” Her face lights up with a bright smile.

“Oh, that’s awesome! It’s really nice to meet you! Please come in, sit down. Make yourself comfortable.” With this, she pulls another chair up to the desk and then sits back down in her own. “I didn’t actually know we had any new agents joining us. That being said, welcome! I’m almost always here by myself so the company will be nice. You and I can get to know each other.” You nod with a smile, watching her as she continues what she was doing. There are several different tabs open across the screens with loads of information that she seems to be compiling. When she sees your incredulous face she laughs.

“I know, it’s a lot. I’m just trying to get as much preliminary information as I can to send to the team. That’s what you’ll be helping me with. We collect research, data, important records. Anything they need to find out, we provide. Kind of cool, right?” Remaining silent, you nod. Upon seeing this, Garcia stops typing for a moment. “I know it may not seem as exciting as field work but it’s still very important. Don’t worry, I’ll make it fun. I promise you won’t be bored.” Patting your knee, she continues typing and you watch carefully now. This is where you will be until the case is over so you intend to make the absolute best of it. Everyone on the team has their own special skills and now is the time to learn from Garcia. 

“So what exactly are you looking for right now?” 

“I am compiling a list of the victim’s friends and family, plus witnesses from the robberies who might be able to give us any information. This will give the others a clear list of where to go first. I’m also seeing what I can find about the people who were at the banks on the days of the robberies in case there’s anything useful they need to know. Financial troubles, criminal records, anything to possibly link the witnesses to one another.” Scooting your chair forward so you can see better, you lean an elbow on the desk. 

“What can I help with?” You ask hopefully. 

“Oh, I think that was the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard. I can’t even count on one hand how many times I’ve had someone down here and all they do is sit and look over my shoulder. Sorry, rambling. I can get you logged into a monitor here and it looks like the next thing on my list was looking into the victim’s workplace. Sound good?” 

“Yes, absolutely.” She moves over quickly and gets a separate monitor opened so you can begin researching. 

“We’ll probably do what research we can in the next twenty to thirty minutes and then we’ll call the team to tell them what we’ve found out.” With that, you make quick work of doing everything you can in the time you have. Even if it is the last thing you ever do, you will prove to Aaron Hotchner just how valuable a team member you are. 

++++++++++

The jet takes off fairly soon once the team is onboard. They all stow their go-bags and begin settling in for the flight. It is going to be a longer one today so they are all preparing themselves for the journey. Aaron finds a seat near a far window where he sets the case file down in front of himself and begins reading. His mind is swimming with thoughts and he will do anything to quiet them. The scene plays out over and over in his head, the memory still painfully fresh. Why had he said those things? He was unnecessarily harsh and he is fully aware of this. Now the first memory you’ll have of starting your dream job will be your new boss treating you appallingly. What had even compelled him to speak to you that way? Seeing you had overwhelmed him. The way you looked when you came into his office for the first time. The way your hair framed your face, the light hopefulness in your eyes, the way you captivated him with your movements. Standing there, just feet away from him, you had looked just as beautiful as the first day he met you. God, why did he lie like that? How could he have said he didn’t recognize you when you had stayed in his thoughts more times than he would like to admit over the past year? All the emotions he felt at the mere thought of you made him nauseous and he had no way of understanding them. As badly as he felt for it, he knew that for the time being it would be best to let you work from the BAU headquarters. 

“Hotch, are you okay?” JJ’s voice brings him quickly back to reality. The fact that she could see how deeply in thought he was makes him feel an odd sense of shame and he straightens in his seat. 

“Of course, I’m fine.” With this, she goes back to her own seat. With a huff of exhaustion, Hotch continues reading. The cabin is silent for a time as the other team members sit reading their case files. 

“So,” Morgan’s voice breaks the quiet. “What do we think of Y/N?” The mention of your name causes Hotch to perk up against his will. 

“Well, I like her.” Emily is the first to chime in. “I know you guys all got to meet her before me but there’s just something about her. An inherent sweetness. I’m really excited to work with her.” 

“Me, too,” JJ says next. “I thought she was kind and open. In this job, that kind of personality is hard to find. I just hope the things she sees doesn’t cause her to lose that. The world needs more kind people, not less. She seems tough though. I think she can handle it.” 

“I totally agree,” Morgan adds, leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed. “She’s got a little bit of fierceness in her but I like that. You’ve gotta be tough to do this job but she’s also sweet. That’s important too. Plus, that kid’s got the cutest smile. Kind of reminds me of my sisters.” At the mention of your smile, Hotch closes his eyes briefly trying to picture that smile directed at him. He quickly catches himself and looks back down at the file. 

“Well, I can’t say I know her that well yet but she seems intelligent. She certainly has eagerness to learn. I think that will help her be successful. It’s very ... refreshing.” Spencer says with a small smile.

“I agree. Right off the bat she’s got a very likable energy,” Rossi begins letting himself trail off for a moment. “Although, I have to say there is something about her that is so familiar. I can’t quite place how I might know her though. Her name too, I recognize it. For a second I thought she recognized me too but I can’t be sure.” The rest of the team watches him for a moment as he tries to recollect how he knows you but he quickly comes up blank. “I’m sure I’ll think of it eventually. Nevertheless she seems like a good kid. I’m excited to see her at work. Just a shame we’ll all have to wait.” 

Hearing this Aaron shifts in his seat, knowing that the comment is directed at him since he was the one that made you stay behind. He is suddenly very aware of the other team members looking at him. 

“Yeah, Hotch. Why isn’t she here? I thought for sure you’d wanna see what she can do.” Derek locks eyes with Aaron, causing him to debate how to answer the question. All his life Hotch has worked to control his feelings and the way that they manifest so his face remains expressionless as he thinks for a short second.

“I think that for right now her time would be better spent helping Garcia and getting used to her new environment. I agree that she does seem very intelligent and more than capable. I would just like to speak with her one on one first before thrusting her into the high intensity atmosphere that comes with our line of work.” However, this answer doesn’t seem to satisfy Morgan’s curiosity. 

“She told me when she came out of your office that you said you didn’t remember her. Is that true?” This continued line of questioning makes his blood begin to boil. Aaron Hotchner of all people knows that lies are what cause the foundations of trust to crumble. If he can’t be honest with himself, how can he expect to be honest with his team? And yet, he finds himself unable to expose his own misdeed. 

“Yes, that is correct. We’ve had a lot of cases come and go in the last few years and no one should be expected to remember every interaction they have in that length of time. According to her it was only one day and it was a long time ago at that. I apologized to her and she understood. That is the end of it.” 

“Look, I’m not passing judgement Hotch. I’m just saying I can understand why she was so hurt,” Hearing this causes his heart to clench. “She looks up to you. She didn’t even have to tell me that, I could just see it. You mentored her in a time that was very uncertain, when she had a lot to prove. She still has a lot to prove and I’m sure she thought that you would have her back and the first thing you tell her is that you don’t even remember who she is? I get it man, you’re under a lot of stress right now but she’s a part of your team. I just thought you of all people would be a little more sensitive than that.” 

His words cut right through Aaron’s heart like a knife but before he has a chance to say anything the laptop screen in the center of the cabin lights up, revealing you and Garcia. Glad for a break from the tension the rest of the team members look toward the screen. With one last glance at Morgan, Hotch leans towards him. “We will discuss this later.” His voice is firm and dangerous but he pulls away to look at the laptop. “What did you find?” He directs at the two of you.

Seeing him causes you to straighten in your seat as you ready yourself to put on your most professional face. Garcia begins telling everyone what she was able to find out about the victim. She has significantly more information than you do but once she’s done she allows you to share what you found. The victim worked at a local grocery store but he had been previously employed at the bank where the robbery took place. The team begin building a rough profile based on the information. You listen closely to their analysis of the unsubs, making mental notes on what you might add to the profile. Before you have a chance to add anything, Hotch thanks the two of you for your work and hangs up. For a moment, you could swear you saw a hint of sadness when he looked at you but you were sure it was just a glitch on the screen. 

“Sorry sweetpea. I could totally tell you wanted to add something. They can be pretty abrupt like that sometimes.” You simply give a small shrug. “Well, why don’t you tell me what it was? It’ll give you a little practice for building profiles.” She scoots to the edge of her chair, looking at you intently to which you give a small laugh.

“Well, as we know all of the unsubs are large burly men. The five of them could easily subdue the few weaker people that were present at each of the robberies and yet they chose to bring guns. I believe this shows that they feel a certain sense of inadequacy in their everyday lives. Despite their masculine appearance I would suspect they all have mediocre jobs where they are looked down upon or treated poorly. It’s possible that they all work at the same place but I would imagine they probably met somewhere else. Maybe a support group of some sort. The use of weapons gives them a sense of power over the victims that helps them live out their mass fantasy. The victim of the last crime scene was shot in the head which indicates some personal relationship between him and the unsub who pulled the trigger. That could be a good place to start.” 

“Well, it definitely makes sense to me. Maybe we can start looking in to possible support groups for these type of men. Oh, and anyone that might possibly have had reason to kill our victim.” Garcia immediately begins typing and you scoot closer to her side. 

“Shouldn’t we wait for the order from Hotch?” She laughs at this. 

“Trust me, sweetheart. At the end of the day he’s gonna thank us for the head start. One thing to know about the boss man. He likes to see initiative but he also wants you to follow his exact orders. It’s a fine balance but once you figure out how to work the line, he’s gonna love you for it.” The thought of Hotch loving you for anything at all in the world makes your heart flutter. Almost instantly you stop that train of thought and berate yourself for even entertaining it. 

“Well, I guess we better get started then.” The rest of the day goes smoothly. You and Garcia coordinate everything beautifully, finding a good amount of information that you save to send to Hotch at the most convenient time. The day seems to be over almost as quickly as it began and you thank Garcia before heading out to your car. The drive home seems to be much more monotonous than before. It seems like you’re back inside your apartment and stretched out on the couch before you can hardly blink. Rolling over, you reach for your phone which you had thrown on the coffee table. With a groan, you begin dialing your sister’s number. As much as today sucked there was no one in the world you’d rather vent to than your sister. 

“Well hey there babe. I’ve been patiently awaiting your call. Give me just a minute to get sat down. I want to hear every last detail.” There are sounds of shuffling on the other side of the phone as she finds a seat. “Okay, I’m all good. Now, tell me about your first day at the BAU! Was it everything you dreamed it would be?” 

“Yeah, not exactly,” You laugh. “It was kind of rough to be honest.” There is a moment of silence as you think how to begin.

“Okay. Start at the beginning, walk me through it.” 

“Alright. Well, I got inside and I was honestly just in awe of being there, just getting to stand in that room. It felt like I was invincible. Derek Morgan was the first one to talk to me. He was just as charming as I remembered. Anyway, he introduced me to the rest of the team and we got to talk for a bit which was really nice, you know? From the get go I really felt like part of the team.” 

“Now you know I hate to interrupt but all of this sounds great!” 

“Yeah, well, that was the best part of the day and it didn’t last very long. After I met everyone I went up to Aaron Hotchner’s office to give him my paperwork. I’m sure you know by now that I was pretty excited to see him again, right? Well, when I told him how excited I was to be working with him again he told me that he didn’t actually know who I was. He completely forgot about me. I mean, I guess I get it. It’s been a year and a half and he meets a lot of people. Why would he remember me specifically?”

“Y/N, don’t invalidate your own feelings. What he said upset you and it’s okay to be hurt. That would have hurt my feelings too. You’re a really great person and he sucks for not thinking about you ever since he met you.” Hearing this, you can’t help but laugh a bit. Her ability to defend you no matter what always cheers you up. 

“Thank you. I appreciate that. I just wish he thought the same. Anyway, I gave him my paperwork so I could travel with the team. They got a case this morning and I was planning to go with them but for some reason Hotch made me stay behind even though I am cleared to be in the field. It just really bummed me out because I was super ready to get out there and start working but I got benched for my very first case. He had me stay with this girl named Garcia, she’s the team’s technical analyst. I mean, she’s really sweet and we worked super well together but I just wish I could have been out there doing the things that I spent seven years of my life training for.” 

“I am so sorry. That sucks. I know how excited you were. Look at the bright side, this is only your first case. You’ll have plenty of opportunities to get out there and prove yourself. It’s all gonna work out.” Unable to keep from smiling, you roll over on your side. 

“Thanks. I really hope you’re right.” Sensing the fact that you’re still upset she decides to help by changing the subject. 

“So, who all did you meet today? I know you already knew a few of the team members but was there anybody new?” 

“Yeah, Elle and Gideon are no longer there. I’m really sad I missed getting to work with them but the people I met seem really amazing. The first girl I met was named Emily Prentiss. She was really nice. The other was a guy named David Rossi.” When you finish your sentence there is nothing but silence on the other end of the phone. You wait a minute for your sister’s response but there is nothing. Before you can ask what’s wrong she chimes in again. 

“Did you say David Rossi?” There is a tone in her voice that you don’t recognize and it causes concern to stir in your stomach. 

“Yeah, why? What’s up?” There is another moment of silence. 

“It’s -- it’s nothing. I shouldn’t bring it up. You’ve already had a rough day.” As if she can sense your anxiety she continues. “Don’t worry, it’s nothing bad. I promise I’ll tell you later, okay? I just don’t think we should talk about it right now, that’s all.” As much as you want to pry you can tell that no matter how much you ask, you’re not getting the answer out of her. With a sense of unease you agree and try changing the conversation again. Once you’ve changed the topic to something other than work you can feel her ease again and the two of you talk for nearly 45 minutes. After a while you decide to call it a night and shortly afterwards you find yourself in bed. You hadn’t even realized how exhausted you were until your head hit the pillow. Your sleep is dreamless which you decide in the morning is probably a good thing. 

++++++++++

The remainder of the case is spent hunkered down in Garcia’s office either doing frantic research or simply getting to know one another. In just a short while the two of you become very fast friends. You realize quickly that you share a lot of common interests and all of your conversations are endlessly fascinating. It also doesn’t take you very long to realize that you actually enjoy the work that you do with her. There is quite a bit of skill required to dig as deeply and accurately as the two of you do. It is a race against the clock to find everything you need in order to help the team and there is a certain level of excitement that comes with that. Of course you still wish you were out in the field but in the end you learn a lot and make a good friend along the way. The case ends rather succinctly with all five unsubs found and arrested with no more casualties along the way. It’s a good feeling, knowing that you helped to catch the bad guys and no one had to die for you to do so. The day the team is set to return you and Garcia head out for coffee before they show up, figuring that you deserve a little treat after all of your hard work. You make light conversation as you make your way back into the building just in time for the team to arrive. You watch them each make their way to their desks, setting down their bags and taking a moment to rest. Of course the last one to walk in is Hotch who heads straight up to his office, shutting the door behind him. 

When you feel like it’s an appropriate time you make your way over to Morgan’s desk. Upon seeing you his lips crack into a wide smile. 

“Well hey sweetheart! I have to say, you did awesome work on this case.” As he says this, he extends his hand for a high five which you quickly grant him. “I know it wasn’t easy having to sit out but you did great. I’m proud of you.” It takes everything in you not to blush. 

“Thanks. I learned a lot and I made a good friend along the way.”

“Yeah, Garcia’s pretty great isn’t she?” He says with a knowing smile.

“She definitely is. She talks about you a lot, you know.” 

“Oh, I know. Baby girl just can’t stop thinking about me. Not that I blame her, of course.” At this you lightly punch his arm. 

“You are both such teases.” This makes Morgan laugh. 

“We gotta keep things interesting.” He leans forward as though he’s about to start his paperwork but he quickly leans back to look at you. “Hey, now that I’m back we gotta go out for drinks tonight. Everyone else is already game so long as you are.” 

“Yeah, I’d like that.” You confirm with a grin.

“Great. You know, I’d say I’m buying but I kind of feel like you owe me.” Your brow furrows in confusion.

“What do you mean by that?” 

“Well, I was trying to get some answers for you so I asked Hotch why he wouldn’t let you on the case and he royally chewed me out for it. In his defense I probably shouldn’t have asked in front of the rest of the team but that decision still just doesn’t sit right with me.” Morgan’s words mingle in your head. It doesn’t sit right with you either but it isn’t really your place to question your boss’ orders. 

“I’m sorry he got upset with you. I do appreciate you defending me though. You’re my knight in shining denim.”

“Anytime kid. I’m happy to help.” Getting to talk to Morgan has almost instantly lifted your spirits. However, it doesn’t take long for your heart to drop into your stomach. 

“Agent L/N. May I speak to you in my office please?” You hadn’t even noticed that Hotch had come out of his office until his voice drew your attention to him. With a quick look at Morgan, who gives you a reassuring glance, you push yourself off his desk and make your way over to where Hotch is standing. Once you’re at his side he extends a hand, allowing you to step inside first. He follows quickly, shutting the door behind him. “Please, have a seat.” He says, gesturing towards a leather couch on the far wall. As you begin to sit on one end he takes up residence on the other, his knee just inches away from yours. Once you’re both settled he focuses all of his attention on you. He doesn’t seem angry but you aren’t holding your breath. It’s best to just stay professional and speak with him earnestly. 

“I’m glad to see you all back safely sir.” You begin. After the stress of the case, you want to make sure he knows that as hurt as you were by his previous decision you harbor no ill will towards him. 

“Thank you. It’s not very often that cases end as well as this one did. You understand that, don’t you? This was a special circumstance.” 

“Yes, I realize that. I’m just grateful that it did end happily even if it was just this once.” There is an intensity in the way he watches you.

“Good. I just want to make sure you fully know what to expect.” 

“I do sir. I did the day that I applied for school. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.” Staying silent for a moment he nods as if in thought. 

“I know before I left I said we would be able to talk. I’d like to learn a little bit more about you and from there I’ll be able to evaluate your abilities before taking you into the field. I know it wasn’t the decision you were hoping for but I hope you understand it nonetheless.”

“Of course. It’s not my place to question you and in the end I learned a lot from Garcia. Plus she was nice to work with.” 

“Good. I’m very glad to hear that you were able to make the most of the situation.” He stops for a moment, his gaze relaxing. “I wanted to tell you how well you did on this case. A challenge was presented to you and you handled it with grace. The information you provided was incredibly helpful and your suggestions were very well thought out. I was very impressed.” The softness in his eyes as he praises you leaves a fluttering sensation in your stomach. Throughout the entirety of the case you had been so hell bent on proving yourself to him and hearing him say that you had done well made every hour of hard work worth it. As much as your heart is singing you have to remind yourself to be calm. Even though he is being kind to you now, he had made his feelings known to you during your first meeting. There is no reason to read into things. Clearly he doesn’t feel what you feel. 

“Thank you sir. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed when I was left behind but I realized that I’m grateful to be here no matter what. I worked really hard to get here, to be doing this kind of work, and not everyone gets the chance to do what they’re truly meant to be doing. As heartbreaking as the outcome of this job usually is, I can’t imagine myself doing anything else.” With every word the two of you are locked into one another’s eyes. For a moment you can almost swear he is holding his breath. 

“I appreciate that sense of purpose. I will always support my team but it makes it easier with members who are invested.” 

“I am. Completely. I’m here. I know you haven’t gotten a real chance to see me work but please know that my heart is in this.” 

“That was never in question,” Hotch pauses, letting his eyes fall to his lap as he considers his next sentence. “I believe now that I made a rash decision in asking you to stay behind. I can see that you are mentally prepared to be in the field. I apologize for my harsh words. I of course can’t say anything for your physical performance yet but I won’t be able to evaluate the full extent of your abilities until I am able to watch you in the field. On the next case I would like you to join the rest of the team.” A breath of relief leaves your lips.

“Of course. I’m ready to get to work.”

“I know. You’ll have the chance soon enough. In the meantime, if you have any questions or concerns feel free to come speak with me.” 

“Thank you sir.” Hotch simply nods in response, beginning to stand. You follow his actions, gathering that he is done with the conversation. As you make your way to the door, feeling much lighter than when you came in, he stops you.

“Agent L/N,” The sound of his voice causes you to turn back. “I just wanted to say again that I’m sorry for not remembering you. I never meant to hurt you. It isn’t that you were forgettable. It’s just that a lot has happened in the last year.” This apology seems much more heartfelt than before and you try to hide a smile. 

“I forgive you, sir.” With that you take your leave, making your way right back to Morgan’s desk. The shift in your mood must be palpable because he looks up at you with a smile.

“That’s not the face of someone that just got yelled at by Hotch.” 

“No, no he didn’t yell at me. He was just telling me I did a good job and he cleared me to work in the field on the next case.” 

“Good for you, kid. I’m glad we’re finally gonna get a chance to see what you can really do,” Nodding you rest against the edge of his desk again. “Now, see? That wasn’t too bad was it?” Looking back towards Hotch’s office you can see him bent over his desk, filling out paperwork. Being able to watch him for a moment without fear of falling apart allows you to crack a small smile.

“No. I guess it wasn’t.” 

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