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middleearthpixie · 1 year

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Better Days ~ Chapter Seventeen

A/N: I wanted to apologize for the lack of updates, but I'm in the middle of working on two fics for the 2023 TRSB, so updates and the like might be a bit spaced out for the next few weeks. Thanks so much for your patience!

Summary: Frerin Durin had the perfect life, until he found out his wife was cheating on him. Now, he’s navigating uncharted territory as an about-to-be divorced single dad. Dating is a mess, he’s dealing with the fallout where his kids are concerned, and really, he would just love a vacation away from all of it.

Elena Madison is new to Sidleburg, and also navigating life as a newly single parent. The last thing she needed was for her daughter to come down sick, when she hasn’t even had time to unpack the moving boxes, never mind find a pediatrician. And the last thing she ever expected was to meet a man like Dr. Frerin Durin…

Neither Elena nor Frerin were looking for anything, but fate has a way of messing up even the best laid plans. However, both have been hurt and both aren't at all sure they trust themselves, never mind trusting someone else...

Pairings: Modern!Frerin x ofc Elena Madison

Characters:Frerin, Elena, Dan

Warnings: None

Rating: T

Word Count: 3k

Tag List: @mrsdurin @i-did-not-mean-to @lathalea @linasofia @fizzyxcustard @legolasbadass @kibleedibleedoo @xxbyimm @arrthurpendragon @exhausted-humxn-being @rachel1959 @laurfilijames @sketchy-loo6195 @sherala007 @enchantzz @knittastically @notlostgnome @myselfandfantasy @medusas-hairband @guardianofrivendell @jotink78 @sorisooyaa @ruthoakenshield @frosticenow @quiall321 @dianakc @buckybarnes-thorin @glassgulls @evenstaredits @heilith @asgardianhobbit98 @albionscastle @absentmindeduniverse @way-too-addicted-to-fandoms @sazzlep @court-jobi @masterofhounds

If you’d like to be added (or removed) to the tag list, please just let me know!

Previous chapters can be found here.

“Someone got lucky this weekend.”

Frerin looked up at the man now standing in the doorway of his office. “Do you ever knock, Mark?”

“The door was open and I didn't want to startle you.”

Frerin sat back in his chair. “What do you want?”

“Nice greeting.” Dr. Mark Edwards, head of Obstetrics and Gynecology, grinned as he came fully into Frerin’s office. “And I notice you did not correct me.”

“I’m not dignifying it with a response.”

“But you’re not denying it and that’s what counts. So, who is she?”

“Go away, Mark. I’m busy.” He gestured to the stack of charts that needed dictating. “I’m about two weeks behind and admin’s breathing down my neck about them.”

“I thought you were admin.”

“I’m as much admin as you are, and you know it.”

“Fair enough.” Mark beached his hands on the back of one of the two chairs opposite Frerin. “Just tell me if I’m right?”

Frerin sighed softly. “Okay. Yes, you’re right. I had a very nice Christmas and that’s all I’m saying.”

“Oh, you can not leave it at that, Frer. Have some mercy, already, won’t you? What do I have to do? Drag you off to the Dunraven and get you drunk to get you to give up any details on this mystery lady, like I had to do in med school?” Mark skirted one of the chairs and sank into it. “Just take five minutes and catch me up. I’ve been away, remember.”

Frerin sighed, setting down the microphone he’d been using in his attempt to get caught up on the charts that needed transcribing. “I don't know what you’re talking about.”

“Come on. I was down in the ER before on a consult and Carol Kingsley told me you brought a mystery woman into the ER with you when you were following up on an admit. All she said was this mystery woman was a cute brunette. So, spill… Besides, you have that look—tired but in the best way possible—which just screams that you got laid sometime in the last forty-eight hours. Most likely more than once, too, you lucky dog.”

Frerin couldn’t hold back his laugh. “I’m not gossiping with you. I tell you anything and by tonight, everyone in this building will know. Including the patients.”

“Just tell me her name.”

He sighed and he couldn't hold back his smile as he said, “Her name is Elena and she’s someone I’ve been seeing for a few weeks, more or less.”

“More or less?”

“We’ve only actually gone out twice. Dinner over the last few days.”

“Uh-huh. I’m listening. Is she cute?”

“What do you think?”

“Oh, my God. You’re killing me, Durin. You know that, right? Absolutely killing me.”

“She’s a hot little brunette, with a thirteen year old daughter who’s in the same math class as Maura.”

“I’m liking her so far.”

“Makes the two of us.” Frerin sat forward. “So, how was Jackson Hole?”

“I was with my wife and four kids, Frer. You were holed up with a hot brunette for how long?”

“She spent Christmas with me.”

“Holidays already? Nice.”

“No. Toni had the kids—still has them—and her daughter is visiting her grandparents, so it started out as just a plan for neither one of us to spend this Christas alone.”

“And let me guess, she moved in.”

“Ha. Funny. No. But, it was a nice few days.”

“Damn… let me guess, hot sex in every room of your house.”

“Not every room, but enough, and that’s all I’m saying.”

“I knew it.” Mark sat back in his chair, his grin fading. “How are the kids taking your dating?”

“They haven’t met Elena yet. That’s next. But, they seem okay with the idea of Dad dating, so, I’m only a little nervous about introducing them.”

“Good luck. I don't know how sticky it might be.”

“Yeah. Me, neither. I mean, like I said, they seem okay with the idea of it. But I don't know about the actual practice of it. And I’m sure they don't even want to think about the old man having sex with anyone. Although, their mother lives with someone now, and they know why we split up. At least, the older two do.”

“And Jake?”

“He’s blissfully innocent of it and I want to keep it that way.”

“Which is totally understandable. If Maura and Flynn are okay with your girlfriend, he probably will be as well."

“I haven’t really thought of her as my girlfriend, you know.”

“Well, are you seeing anyone else?”

“No.”

“Is she?”

“I don't think so.”

“She’s your girlfriend.”

Frerin chuckled. “I guess she is and I think they’ll be okay with her. At least, I hope so. I know they don't like Tim. They call him the Skeeze.”

It was Mark’s turn to laugh. “The Skeeze?”

“Yeah. Maura describes him as being like a used car salesman and she’s… not wrong.”

“Ah… it makes sense now.”

“Dr. Durin? Katie rapped on the open door. “You’re needed in the nursery.”

He sighed softly. “Please tell me it’s not bad.”

“No. Newborn delivered in the ER just came up. You just need to make sure he’s as healthy as they claim down there.”

“Got it.” He closed the chart he’d been working on and stood, sweeping his lab coat from the back of his chair. “I’ll catch up with you later, Mark.”

“Yeah. I want to hear all the details about your merry Christmas.”

“You’ve heard them all.” Frerin shrugged into the coat. “And I have no more to share.”

“Damn, you’re cold, you know that.”

“I don't kiss and tell.” He clipped his ID badge to the coat’s lapel. “I’ll see you later.”

“I’m getting details if it kills me,” Mark said as they left his office, before he strode off in the opposite direction.

“Do we have gossip, Dr. D?” Katie asked as she came around the corner with a thin sheaf of papers in one hand.

“Not you, too.”

“I’m just as curious about your mystery woman.”

“Katie.”

“What? We all just want you to be happy, is all. Promise.”

“I am. And if anyone needs me, I’ll be in the nursery, checking on a hopefully heathy newborn.”

“And are we expecting anyone to need you?”

“Katie.”

“You seem happy, you know,” she told him as she skirted her desk to tug out her chair.

“I am happy.”

“Good. Whoever she is, she’s probably good for you.”

“Her name’s Elena and yes, she is. And if she happens to call me for any reason—”

“I’ll let you know, unless you’re in with a patient.”

“Thank you.” He smiled as she went back to whatever she was working on, and continued on his way down to the nursery.

Sidleberg Memorial Hospital had had an infant stolen from their nursery the year Frerin was finishing up his residency and ever since, it was a locked ward, controlled by a keypad. Every infant had a band about their ankle with what the staff called baby LoJack that would set off an alarm system if the code wasn't entered in before the baby or their bassinet was wheeled out of the ward. Each newborn also had a hospital ID anklet, and the number on the band matched the bracelet worn by the mother and, if applicable, the father. No baby was to be handed off to anyone without first double checking that the ID bands matched.

Frerin punched in his code and stepped into the nursery, where it was a rare quiet day. Only three infants were in residence and he smiled at the nurse at the desk. “I heard we have a newcomer to the group, Chelsea?”

“Hi, Dr. Durin.” Chelsea smiled as she looked up from the paperwork on the desk before her. “We do, indeed. Baby Girl Hillstrand came up from the ER a few minutes ago. Thirty-six weeks, without complications.”

“And where’s mom?”

“She is still in the ER. They were having a bit of trouble with her, but dad is right there.”

He looked over to see the lone man in civilian clothes standing at the bassinet in the corner, his clothes wrinkled and his expression a mix of awe and concern. Frerin turned back to Chelsea. “What sort of trouble?”

“Hemorrhage.”

“How badly?”

“I don’t know. Carol Kingsley brought dad and baby up and told dad to think good thoughts and stay with his daughter.”

“Do me a favor. Get me the ER, Kingsley if possible.”

She reached for the phone. “Will do.”

“Thank you.”

With that, he crossed over to the man at the bassinet. “Mr. Hillstrand?”

The man looked up. “Max, please.”

“Max, I’m Dr. Durin, Head of Pediatrics. I’m just going to take a look at your daughter, if that’s okay.”

He nodded. “Yeah… uh… it’s fine…. Um… do you know what’s going on with my wife? They said they were having trouble getting her bleeding to stop.”

“It happens sometimes,” Frerin told him as he eased his stethoscope from around his neck. “I’ve got Nurse Ross trying to get me an update on her. Try not to worry, okay? She’s got good people working on her.”

“We’re not even from here. We live in Poughkeepsie and just came down to spend the holiday with my in-laws. Dana wasn’t even due for another four weeks, but her OB thought it would be fine for her to come to Jersey. Is that why the baby came so early? Because she traveled?”

“Thirty-six weeks is considered full-term, not early, and probably not. Babies are weird like that—they come when they’re good and ready or they get impatient. I doubt it was anything you or your wife did.” Frerin eased in the earpieces and bent over to press the diaphragm to the tiny chest of the baby girl who just watched him with big, slate-blue eyes. She was calm, those eyes following him. “Good girl,” he murmured, moving the diaphragm across her chest. “You’re just fine, aren’t you? Just felt like showing up a little early, is all. Impatient to get into the world, right?”

“Her name is Jessica,” Max Hillstrand told him softly, his voice cracking. “But, the nurses said… they said that Dana has to give them permission to call her that.”

“It’s standard policy,” Frerin explained, straightening up as he pulled the earpieces free and slung the stethoscope about his neck once more. He smiled down at Jessica, who still watched him intently. “Her heart and lungs sound good. Let me just—”

“Dr. Durin,” Chelsea came over to them, “Nurse Kingsley said to tell you and Mr. Hillstrand that they’ve gotten the bleeding under control and Mrs. Hillstrand is on her way up.”

Mr. Hillstrand looked over at her. “She’s okay?”

Chelsea nodded. “She gave them a little bit of a scare, but she is going to be just fine, yes.”

He just stared at her for a long moment, then he grabbed a very surprised Frerin in a bear hug. “Thank you! Thank you both!”

“You’re welcome,” Frerin chuckled as Hillstrand just as quickly released him. “Chelsea, make sure Baby Girl Hillstrand gets her LoJack as soon as possible and then see if Mrs. Hillstrand would like to see her daughter as well.”

“Of course.”

He turned to Hillstrand. “Congratulations, Mr. Hillstrand. Enjoy it, it goes by a lot faster than you think it will.”

“Thank you, Doctor.”

Frerin’s cell rang then, and he slid it free and smiled, “You’re welcome. If you’ll excuse me then.”

He left the nursery and brought the phone to his ear. “Hey, honey, you have perfect timing.”

“Do I? That’s a first,” Elena laughed.

He rounded the corner, stepping from pediatrics to Labor and Delivery and paused, leaning up against the wall. “What’re you doing up? It’s almost one in the morning.”

“I was thinking about you, that’s all. How’re you holding up?”

“After a weekend of nonstop sex? I’m beat, but apparently I look as if I’ve gotten some, so I guess that’s a good thing.”

She burst out laughing again. “What?”

“Yeah, one of the other docs pointed it out the moment he saw me. So, I look tired, but in a good way, I guess.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

“Sorry? What on earth are you sorry for, Elena? This was probably the hottest Christmas I’ve ever had. You can screw my brains out any time.”

“I kind of like how that sounds.” Her voice lowered and the husky purr shot straight through him as she added, “And I’d like to try it again really soon.”

“Yeah?”

“Oh, yeah. It was amazing, Frerin.”

“It was good.”

“Good? Dr. Durin, you have a gift and you know it. You made my damn eyes cross.”

“Seems fair enough. You did the same to me, so…”

“So, when is your next night off?”

He grinned. “Tomorrow night.”

“Good. I’ve got plans for you, Dr. Frerin.”

His groin tightened at the promise in her voice. “Such as?”

“If I told you, I’d spoil the surprise.” Her voice grew throatier still. “Let’s just say I think you’ll like them.”

“Lena… honey… you’re killing me.”

“How? I haven’t even said what I wanted to do to you.”

“It doesn’t matter. You just sound hot enough to make me hot.”

“Good. So, can I steal you for a few hours tomorrow?”

“I’d have to be crazy to say no.”

“So don't say no.”

“I’m not. What can I bring?”

“Just yourself. I’ve got the rest of it all taken care of.”

A soft tingle rippled through him at the sin in her voice. “I’m going to get spoiled by you, you know.”

“I can live with that.”

“Good. Although,” he switched the phone to his other ear, “I will return the favor, you know.”

“I expect no less from you. Okay, I’ll let you get back to work.”

“Probably a good idea.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow night.”

“What time?”

“Seven?”

“Seven it is.”

Elena let her phone hit the pillow next to her. “What the hell were you thinking? I’ve got plans for you? Christ, you’re an idiot. You have no plans. You’ll fall on your face if you try to be sexy and embarrass yourself silly if you try to be kinky and you’ll send him screaming for the hills if you do both.”

She clapped a hand to her forehead. The words had popped out before she could think them through and she didn't know why. Didn’t Dan tell her she was the most boring lay he’d ever had? That was why he cheated. He looked for more adventurous women. More exciting women.

Less boring, vanilla women.

She was vanilla. Boring. Non-adventurous.

And now, Frerin was expecting some hot, sultry temptress.

She was none of those things.

She chewed on the cuticle of her thumb. It was late, but she could certainly text someone at that hour, right?

She pulled up Heather Morgan’s number. Heather and her husband Chris lived next door to Elena and Dan on West Point Island in Lavallette and there was no one in the world Elena trusted the way she did her best friend.

Help! How do I do sexy for a guy without looking utterly stupid?

She hit send and set her phone on her nightstand. No sooner had she shut off the light, but her phone rang. “What are you doing up now?”

“I was going to ask you that,” Heather said with a laugh. “Is the guy there now? Who is he? What’s he like? Why didn't you tell me about him?”

“No, he’s not here now. I’m seeing him tomorrow. His name is Frerin Durin and I met him a few weeks ago.”

“Uh-huh… do tell.”

Elena smiled. “I had to take Lyss to the ER a few weeks ago and he was her doctor.”

“You bagged her doc! You slut!” Heather let out another laugh. “Oh my fucking god, Elena, how do you do it?”

“I didn’t bag him then. I just—he’s really nice, Heath. I bumped into him at the gym a couple days later and we got to talking and now—”

“You have to be sexy for him?”

“Oh, Christ, I called him a little while ago and I don't know what came over me, but yeah. I basically told him he’d be in for the time of his life tomorrow night and you know me… I’m so boring, it isn’t funny.”

“You’re not boring.”

“I’m vanilla.”

“There’s a reason why people love vanilla, you know.” Heather’s voice grew serious. “It’s not bad.”

“No, it’s just boring. And that’s why guys cheat on me.”

“Dan cheated on you because he’s a total dick and your doctor isn’t like that.”

“You don't even know him.”

“I don’t have to. He’s an ER doc. He’s already a better person than your prick ex.”

“He’s actually a pediatrician.”

“That’s even better.”

“Heather.”

“What? It is. Is he younger than you?”

“No. He’s the same age. In the midst of a divorce and he’s got custody of his three kids, one of which is in one of Alyssa’s classes.”

“Oh, I like this man, El. He sounds like he might be a keeper, if the divorce doesn’t ruin him.”

Elena couldn't help her smile. “And that’s why I want to keep my promise that he’s in for the time of his life.”

“No problem. You’re on break, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Good. I’ll be up around ten with my bag of tricks and when I leave, you’ll be ready to treat your Dr. Durin to a night he will not forget any time soon.”

“Are you sure?”

“Hell, yes! You’re back in the saddle and I want you to enjoy every minute you can with this man. You deserve it, hon. But… where’s Alyssa?”

“She’s in Florida with Don and Alice.”

“Nice. So you can fuck this guy right there on the living room floor if you want.”

“I can, but that dose’t sound comfortable at all.”

“Elena!”

“What?”

“You’re hopeless, you know that?”

“I know. That’s why I sent you an S.O.S.”

“And don’t worry. I’ll save your ass and you’ll knock his socks off, along with everything else he might be wearing.”

#Gerard Butler #Frerin Durin #Frerin x OC #AU #Frerin Fic #Is it hot in here?#Romance #Modern AU #ER AU #Hospital AU #Richard Armitage #The Hobbit #Thorin Oakenshield #Hobbit Fic #Hobbit Fanfic #Fan fiction #The Hobbit fan fiction

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arotechno · 3 years

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Jughead (2015), Issues 9-11: Discussion and Commentary

This brings us to the first arc written by Ryan North, who saw that the aroace Jughead train had left the station and simply could not resist tagging along for the ride. If you’ve followed anything about Jughead as a character at all, then you’ve probably seen many screenshots from these three issues before. It’s the Sabrina arc (that’s right, as in the teenage witch)!

I have a lot of analysis at the end of this one, so buckle up!

The gang ends up at Pop’s, as usual, where Jughead meets the shop’s new mascot, a talking burger lady. Jughead is, unsurprisingly, thrown off his game by this. After all, burgers are his one true love, but girls? He doesn’t really have an interest in them. It’s a confusing moment for him, and when his friends witness this, well… they assume he’s got a crush on her.

This is an iconic page in the “aro Jughead” canon. Here we have Betty trying really hard to be a good friend and doing what in her mind is the best for him, trying to help him through what she and the others perceive as his first crush. Jughead, meanwhile, is diving headfirst into a spiral of confusion (and later, discomfort) at the idea of having any sort of interest in another person.

I want to give my utmost respect to Ryan North for explicitly having Jughead say that he doesn’t get crushes. It’s not the only time that North does this during this arc, and I think it makes all the difference between making this awkward and relatable rather than making it seem like Jughead is being stripped of or “cured” of being aro.

Betty pushes Jughead to talk to Sabrina (the burger lady—it’s Sabrina), and after a while of running into each other day in and day out as Jughead frequents Pop’s on a regular basis, they strike up a friendship. Jughead has gotten what he wanted—to be friends with the cool burger lady—and he seems genuinely satisfied.

…But unfortunately, things do not go as planned for Jughead. The next time they see each other, Sabrina asks Jughead out. And Jughead, in true stereotypical oblivious aro fashion, agrees, without realizing until it is much, much too late that what he has just agreed to is a date. Like, a real date.

If you think about it, Jughead has probably never been asked on a real date before. And this is something I ABSOLUTELY would have done (and may still do today, if I’m completely honest with myself) as a teenager. Jughead’s immediate regret is so palpable here, and so relatable to me as an aromantic.

In his panic, Jughead turns to his friends for help. They are… not helpful. They’re trying to be helpful, sure, but whereas Jughead doesn’t really seem to want to go through with this at all, his friends are more set on giving him romantic advice (with varying degrees of usefulness). Jughead really has to go out of his way to defend himself and insists on multiple occasions that he thinks the girl in the burger costume is cool and interesting, but that he doesn’t like-like her, he doesn’t even really know her!

Unfortunately for Jughead, he ends up going on the date. And who does he call for help? His only other openly queer friend (I say openly because let’s be real with ourselves, none of those kids are cishet), Kevin Keller.

And okay, this scene with Kevin is genuinely kind of funny. You get the impression that Kevin has had a lot of practice dealing with straight bullshit, and that he’s more than a little disappointed that Jughead’s “big emergency” turned out to be something this totally mundane and not worth his time.

Ultimately, Kevin is also super not helpful, even after Jughead steals his phone in an attempt to get him to come to the table and diffuse the awkward situation Jughead has found himself in. So Jughead resorts to what I can only assume is plan Z, which is to call Archie for backup.

Only semi-related, I really love the way Ryan North writes conversations between these two. It just feels really genuine and believable. And anyway, I don’t know what Jughead was expecting, but resident himbo Archie Andrews is of no help to him, and only ends up making things a hell of a lot worse.

This leads to Sabrina rushing off to the bathroom and casting multiple spells to try to get Jughead to at least play along, if not outright fall in love with her, all of which fail spectacularly and only end up making her far angrier with him. I don’t blame her for being upset—the date was a total disaster, and right at the moment Jughead was about to be honest with her, Archie showed up and made things worse. Sabrina storms out, and vows that she’ll get revenge on Jughead for this, somehow.

All of Sabrina’s subsequent spells on Jughead also backfire. She tries to make him fail his classes, and he passes with flying colors; she tries to make him spend the whole day with resident asshole Reggie, but he ends up befriending him against all odds. She even ends up unleashing a giant eldritch horror by accident, and—well, that’s not important.

In the end, Jughead decides to make things right. He never meant to hurt Sabrina, and she seems to be in a tough spot, having just moved to town, so he brings her some food as a peace offering and explains what really happened. And Sabrina is… surprisingly receptive, in fact more receptive than Jughead’s friends were when he came to them for help, despite the fact that this is something they should already understand about him. Being upset with Jughead wasn’t doing her any favors, so Sabrina already seems to be at peace with what happened and is more than willing to forgive him and be his friend despite all that transpired between them.

This is a really great scene. There’s a nuance to it—the way Jughead acted on their date was unfair, both to Sabrina and to himself. He needed to be honest from the beginning, but instead, he just kept trying to escape. At the same time, Sabrina gets it, and it wasn’t very cool of her to try to use magic to get what she wanted, either (not that Jughead knows she did that).

Jughead helps Sabrina re-enroll in her old school and quit her job at Pop’s to move back in with her aunts, so that she can live out the rest of her teenage years the way she’s supposed to. Afterwards, Sabrina and Jughead both seem really happy, and thus volume two ends on a positive, quiet note.

I really like this arc, for the reasons I’ve already stated and more. It’s funny and awkward and endearing (I say that a lot about this series, don’t I?), and it portrays a realistic and relatable aromantic problem without it being aboutaromanticism. It’s more about Jughead being honest about his feelings and making a new friend than about Jughead being aro, even though that contextualizes the situation. A great deal of the series is about that—Jughead being honest with himself and others. In the first arc, it’s Jughead shaking off a persona of apathy. In the second, it’s Jughead being honest with Archie about their friendship and the way Archie’s behavior has been making him feel. Here, it’s about Jughead being honest about who he is at his core, and accepting it about himself—and Sabrina accepts it, too, no questions asked. Even if he never says “I’m aromantic,” the sentiment is there plain as day, and it’s a refreshing beat for the story to land on.

That said, I do have a bone to pick with this arc. There’s a line in the sand here between Zdarsky and North. In the last arc, we saw Zdarsky portray that really subtle but meaningful interaction between Archie and Jughead, in which Archie seems not only keenly aware of Jughead being aromantic—even without the word—but also tacitly supportive of him, such that he knows immediately when he’s crossed a line. Here, we see Ryan North take a bit of a step back from that, such that Archie may be aware of Jughead’s orientation but seems way too quick to assume all that’s changed the moment there’s even a sliver of possibility that Jughead has a crush. That’s the reality of having different writers stepping in to interpret the same characters in loosely connected stories like this, but it still bothers me. I prefer Zdarsky’s style of storytelling in general, but in particular I also prefer his portrayal of Archie, as much as Ryan North’s on-the-nose aro moments and undying love for Reggie make me very happy. As a whole, nobody ever stops to ask Jughead what he wants, they only tell him what they think Sabrina wants. Jughead says so himself:

I suppose one could make the argument that Jughead’s friends, or even Jughead himself, are only really aware of the asexual bit (if at all—for all we know Veronica and Reggie have no idea, for example) and that’s why they don’t only never mention aromanticism but also sometimes seem ignorant of it. It’s possible that the aro side of Jughead’s orientation is still something he doesn’t have the words for, despite it being a truth he knows about himself, and in fact I think that would have been an interesting angle to take, had this series continued beyond 15 issues. But what I have an issue with isn’t so much the fact that Jughead’s friends are unhelpful (because let’s be real, sadly a lot of us have been there), but the fact that never are they asked to apologize for pushing him to do something he so clearly didn’t want to do. Whether he or they know he’s aromantic or not, he was clearly uncomfortable with the idea of going on this date—and not just due to a lack of experience. I would have liked it had Archie, or Betty, or Kevin apologized, or even once asked him what he really wanted. Betty comes the closest, by talking it out with him in the first place, but even she still earnestly pushes him to go through with the date anyway.

Anyway, there are two arcs left for me to discuss, and frankly I’m not as enthused by either of them as I was for these past three, for a variety of reasons. The Ryan North train continues for one more arc, and then it’s on to Mark Waid and Ian Flynn’s big finish. Those two updates might come a little slower. Until then, I was going to include a compilation of Jughead looking uncomfortable, but I've only got one image slot left thanks to tumblr, so instead I leave you with this:

Same, Jughead. Huge same.

#mr. north i promise i respect you #techno's jughead reread #aro #aromantic #aro jughead #ace jughead #aroace jughead #jughead #jughead jones #jughead comics #op #long post

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aconstantstateofbladerunner · 3 years

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The Glitch

I get the Broken Reality au is a haha funny joke but there’s been some legit great art for it and since Butterfly is over and I haven’t gotten into the groove of my other projects yet, I decided to try some flash fiction of my interpretations. Note that this is very small and informal; I used whatever idea came into my head over the course of an hour or so instead of the weeks of planning that go into my usual fics. This was an experiment for fun. But if people enjoy the concept, I may be tempted to expand on it.

Credit to @lollitree @moonpaw @gentrychild @owlf45 and @cyber-phobia (I’m sorry if I missed someone I lost track of how many people were involved in this mess).

Content working for reference to infant death.

Please enjoy!

The city shut down for a typhoon warning. Thunder rumbled in the distance. Dark clouds blocked the sun so much that by mid-morning it still looked like it never bothered coming up. And yet the humidity made it too hot for coffee. Inko didn’t know how to feel. Work would have been a good distraction. But she didn’t want any coworkers or clients to see if today got to be too much. And it was already shaping up to be. She caught herself making two plates of food for breakfast.

Inko sat alone in the kitchen. She couldn’t bring herself to finish her own plate. Sickness set in fast. The food had been cold for a long time before she summoned the strength to get up and throw it away. Then she stood over the open trash can a while, debating whether to try and hold it together, or just throw up and get it over with. She eventually managed to keep her stomach steady enough to go back to her bedroom. There was another trashcan in there anyway.

A sound stopped her. From her office. The distinct sound of something heavy falling onto the carpet. Right as she walked past the door.

Please not this again…

She opened the door with her eyes closed. Her mind conjured a familiar image. A bedroom full of books and hero posters. Bright colors and personal touches. A child’s room. Inko opened her eyes to her drab home office. Some of the older case file binders slipped off the pile again. She really needed to sort those into storage. Not today though. She didn’t bother to pick it up.

Inko walked faster than normal the rest of the way to her room. She doesn’t want to face the temptation to search for old toys she remembers storing in the empty closet. Or search the walls for scuff marks from action figures tossed into them she could always see even after the walls were painted. She hid her planner on a tall shelf and put the ladder away to make it that much harder to go through it over and over looking for doctors’ appointments and school events she knew were coming up. Finally reaching her bed brought no comfort.

Of course she knew today’s date by heart. She hadn’t put it on a calendar in the fourteen years since she used to look at it every day. Inko stuck her head under her pillows, as if they could block out the silent noise of her memories. Memories of before, the time even when she was by herself, she was never alone.

Fifteen years now, today. With a shuddering gasp, the tears finally came. Thunder crashed outside. It’s not fair! Why is it still this hard after this long? Phantom kicks in her belly joined the growing ice there.

The hardest part was she still felt like that sometimes. Like she wasn’t really alone. Inko didn’t believe in ghosts, but the lost of what could have been was more than haunting enough. She felt it watching her. Judging her. Waiting just long enough for her to settle down into a peaceful, content existence before it reared up to plague her heart all over again. Cliché hauntings like spooky faces in the mirror or blood coming out of the drains would have been preferable. Those would be generic enough not to remind her directly.

Rain started outside. Her phone lit up with a notification she ignored in time with a thunderclap. The storm was getting closer.

Maybe I should call Hisashi, the thought crossed her mind. Maybe he’s going through this too. She bit her lip bloody. Her frustrated memories weren’t in question like the others. Probably not though. I don’t want to talk to him anyway.

Hisashi had been stuck in the denial stage of grief, which often came off as him acting like he didn’t take hers seriously. Not a year, not even half a year looking back, after they came home from the hospital, he wanted to try again.

“We can’t let mourning hold us up forever,” he said. “And it’s not like we lost a once in a lifetime opportunity! We’ve got at least another twenty years to keep trying!”

But we did lose him! she had wanted to scream. Still did, years later. Why didn’t he understand? He was your loss too! Inko wanted for the next roll of thunder, then shouted.

“I don’t just want any baby! I want Izuku!”

The lights went out. The temperature rose five degrees instantly when the ceiling fan stopped going. The rain stopped.

Power outage. Inko sat up with a sniffle. Turns out the notification was a warning about roving blackouts. Of course. Oh well. I wasn’t really in the mood to cook tonight any-

Thunder boomed even louder than before, making her jump. Then another. Lightning flashed outside at the same time. It was right on top of her.

What? I thought the typhoon wasn’t supposed to make landfall until later toni-

Another crash. It vibrated through her bones. Then another. The lightning lit up her whole room. Except for a shadow on the wall. Inko jolted to look, holding her breath, and found only her own shadow in the next flash.

“I’m such an idiot…” She went for her phone again. For peace of mind, she decided to use her data to check if an evacuation order went out. Or any updates at all really, since the weather came so much faster than the news said. “Nothing,” she sighed annoyed. “I hate being alone for weather like this…”

A new notification pinged.

[Mom]

Inko blinked rapidly. The message remained. All of her insides turned inside out in an instant, and she started crying again. Was this someone’s idea of a sick joke? No one ever got a chance to call her that. She touched the note to open it, but nothing happened. No app or source was displayed. Nor did it go away after a few seconds like normal.

“Wha- What’s going on?” she wept. In a mix of sorrow and rage, she wound up to chunk the device across the room. But she froze.

Outside her window, floating against the pitch-black sky, were two small orbs. Perfectly circular and glowing. Watching her. She didn’t dare move.

Another ping. She looked without moving.

[I’m sorry]

“… What?”

For a moment, all the sounds in the world dropped out. They all came back at ounce.

Lights flickered. Both the ones inside and the lightning going outside. Multiple strikes laid on top of one another. No relief. Thunder pounded over and over like a drum solo. It shook the whole building. Inko ran into the closet away from the window. She slammed her hands over her eyes but it didn’t help. Her terrified cried were whispers to the screams of the storm.

A child’s scream. She heard it. Each flash of light came with a cry. The distinct sound of a little boy calling out in pain blended with unyielding nature. It came from every direction. Every hair on Inko’s arms stood up in fear. She felt the charge in the air. But she had to go out. Her baby was crying for help.

She burst from the closet into the living room. All the lights and appliances turned themselves on and off. The TV showed only static between its flashes. Something drew her too it. The storm was deafening. It pounded through her head like a heartbeat. The beats got faster. The static flashes started to look like a face. Her usual caution was abandoned as she fell to her knees and touched the screen. The snow cleared for a single instant. Just long enough to look like the blank eyes from the window. She felt the heartbeat there too.

Then it stopped. All of it. The noise and lights all went quiet and dark. The TV went completely cold in an instant. Inko, stunned, palmed over it looking for something. Anything. The pulse. Warmth. A burnt fuse or faulty wire. But nothing. The rain started again.

She pulled her hands back to her lap. Her heart was still racing and tears kept flowing down under her chin. She looked around. Everything in the living room and kitchen looked the same. No sign of the earthquake-like convolutions the whole appartement experienced only minutes ago. Inko combed the entire space for evidence. An object knocked off the shelf. A picture frame fallen from the wall. The notifications. Toys in the closet or scuffs in the wall. Still not a sign. She even stepped outside her door to check the sky. Only light rain and shattered thunder, just like the news said the day before.

There was only one thing out of place. Back in her bedroom, the bottom drawer of her nightstand hung open. Inko had to steal herself before approaching it. There were only two things in there: a little green blanket, and a picture of the ultrasound. The most recent one from her last appointment. The doctor said he was doing fine.

“Izuku…” she whispered to it in her hand.

She remembered the squealing little bundling being put in her arms for the first time. The first time he smiled at her. Teaching him to walk, then immediately launching into play. Him coming home with bruises and scrapes after the kids at school were mean to him, and crying in her arms. Then, him coming home with his first real friends in a long time. She made them all dinner. Katsudon. That was Izuku’s favorite.

Only she didn’t remember. The same way she didn’t really remember the toys and scuffs. Those were fantasies. Daydreams of what could have been. She just thought about them so often they felt like memories. Especially today. It was his birthday after all. They’d fade back into vague dreams by tomorrow. They always did.

And she would be left with reality. The silence. The cold, still little hand between her fingers. Soft cheeks without blush. Eyes that never opened. Clutching him too tight to her chest, knowing the second she let go he would be gone for real and it would all be over.

But it was never over. Inko went through this same torturous song and dance every year for fifteen now. All the guilt and dread would subside slowly over the next one, until it all came back at once. Just like this.

At least it’s done for now, she tried to reassure herself, climbing back into bed. It still wasn’t even noon yet. Plenty of time for another breakdown. Hopefully the next one won’t be, feel, as loud. She sighed heavily into her sheets. This sort of thing can’t be normal. I should really try therapy again.

Against her better judgement, she kept the blanket out, and clutched it to her chest. Static electricity pricked her fingers. With her other hand, she reached across the bed, and tried to imagine someone else there. Not Hisashi, never him anymore. Izuku. He was fifteen and happy, but the storm was making him nervous so he came to lay beside her. She remembered it like it was now. If she closed her eyes, she could feel his warm, soft skin, with a healthy, if a little anxious heartbeat just underneath. The mattress warped as he sighed.

“We’ll be okay. It’s just a little rough weather,” she promised.

“Okay, Mom,” Izuku answered quietly. “… I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” I’ll start trying to get myself together tomorrow. For now, let me have this.

Izuku didn’t respond for a while. “I love you.”

“I love you too, baby. Happy birthday.”

#midoriya inko #midoriya izuku #broken reality au #the glitch #mha #bnha #mha fanfiction #bnha fanfiction #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #aconstantstateoffanfiction #april fools #the long con

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mrslandgraab · 2 years

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In theory a small update like this one does not need it’s whole wordpress post. I will admit that it has been almost exactly half a year since I played the Trepes do to taking a job, finishing my bachelor’s and also starting my master’s. As such this summary, while done with love, is a bit smaller and quicker and less “wittier” than my usual style. Most of all, you are to be up to date when it comes to us making our journey back to the Trepe’s.

Like any good update, this one starts with death. I reloaded the lot and found out that Erik Swain had died about one day before college would have ended. It seems like he did not want to participate in this legacy any longer.

I did do my best to at least get him back but as you can see neither the Grim Reaper nor any of the roomies were very much into saving him. Poor Erik. May your spirit rest in this dorm.

Honey: I cannot believe how Ginger will feel about this. I always felt there was this light connection between them :(

Ginger: Well, Jimmy, I know you are feeding off an audience but I feel you are the only one for me. Nobody else will understand that my one true love is science.

Jimmy Phoenix: Well, my one true love is Ty Bubbler...and err...you I guess

Ginger: You know, I’m pretty okay with this.

Nevermind then. Ginger did not cry a single tear for her supposed one true love and went right back to the guy who only used her as an occaisional third. Seems like Knowledge Sims really are a bit more open minded.

Jane Stacks: Oh, what a coincidence - us two family sims meeting here after a tragical death that might play with your emotional judgement.

Basil: I’m so glad you are here, Jane. And may I say this white dress looks amazing on you?

Jane: I just so happenned to hear the news and simply had to check on you by myself. Are you feeling okay, Basil? Do you want some company?

Basil: Well if you are asking so kindly...

Basil: I’d honestly not know what to do without you.

It was a little bit odd how Jane had been the last person Erik hung out with before his tragical accident - but that meant she and Basil could share each other’s pain even better - the loss of a Sim one did not really care about.

For Honey and Tolliver things became a little shaken during the night. She always loved his charming endavours but lately, as adorable as he was, she felt like he was just a little too depedent on her.

Maybe it was good that they were graduating soon. She’d have to move back with her parents anyway and she needed all of her wits to survive there.

And well, spending time with behind the greenhouse somewhat always ended the same wonderful way. She still had so much time - Erik hadn’t seized the moment, so there was a lot more reason for her to keep doing so.

Erik: Surprise! Did you really T H I N K that was it? Just because I might be challenged when it comes to takign the trash out that doesn’t mean I am that easily to be removed from the narrative. Oh H E L L no. And I should know. I’ve been there.

Erik: You’ve lost the heirpol, Ginger. And so did your brother. You think that means escaping your household? You poor dumb thing.

Erik: Mark my words, Ginger Trepe. Post-graduation means you twop stop being relevant for your family’s line. And I should know what that means...let’s see if you do.

Things were quiet at college. Erik’s warning felt like a hollow song. They all graduated one way or another and decided to move their seperate ways.

Jane and Basil would move in together. The two of them were entirely inseperable since Erik had passed away.

Though it sometimes seemed like Basil was still figuring some things out.

Honey seemed a bit distracted and to Ginger’s surprise did not bring anyone home. She saw herself responsible for moving back in with Mom and Dad - and quietly called it “revenge” here and there for the time she spent on the sidelines during her childhood.

Still, she seemed ready to take charge - like a true wolf would.

For Ginger the warning was soon only a distant memory. She most of all wanted to become a doctor and there was no residency for her in the tiny town of Sesame Beach.

Lucky for her, Ginger had a fairy godmother.

#trepe legacy #trepe legacy gen2 #trepe legacy: honey trepe #trepe legacy: ginger trepe #trepe legacy: basil trepe #trepe legacy: titania summerdream

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tyongxnct · 4 years

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𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒𝑠𝑖𝑐𝑘 - 𝐽𝑢𝑛𝑔 𝐽𝑎𝑒𝘩𝑦𝑢𝑛

summary: It was all about sex, but what happens when feelings grow and lust becomes love? What happens when you fall in love with your fuckbuddy?

genre: angst, smut, a little bit fluff // fwb!au, college!au

warnings: smut, a glass cut on (Y/n) foot, possible errors because I first wrote this stoy with Yeri (red velvet) as (Y/n) I tried to edit the story as much as possible

word count: 12k

A/N

It is finally happening. I finished my first story ever and posted it. Thank you for taking your time and reading this story I've came up with. I must admit, I'm a little scared, it's my first time publishing my own work. This is my first story and I'm so thankful for my friends, who helped me and supported me through this whole process of creating "Lovesick".

Thank you Jung Jaehyun for exisiting.

One last thing; I am probably going to write Taeyong and Seulgi's story as a spin-off, so If you are intersted, you can follow me and I'll keep you updated. :)

thanx

“We’re just friends. Friends who fuck. I don’t see the problem here? We both agreed on this, it’s just sex. No feelings, no emotions & nothing more than sex.”, he said.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. Why her? You could fuck anybody. Why does it have to be a friend? How did you two even start this whole thing?”, Johnny and Jaehyun were leaning agains Jaehyun’s car as you walked over to them. But you stopped and listened to them. You had to know what Jaehyun felt about it.

Jaehyun remembers the first time you slept together very well. It was awkward but a good awkward. It just felt right and both of you needed it at that moment, so why not?

“It’s different, I can’t explain it.”

“So you like her?”, Johnny asked.

“Of course not! As a friend? Yeah. And that’s it. Nothing more.”, he sounded disgusted. Was he disgusted?

3 months ago

“I know I suck sometimes, but I never thought I am that horrible as a girlfriend.”, Yuta had just broken up with you and there you are, drinking your problems away. “Are you out of your mind? Just because that asshole told you some stupid stuff, he’s right? You are great, the best.”, Wendy was ready to fight Yuta.

Yuta and you met in your first year of high school and you’ve been together nearly a year, until he decided to break up because you ‘sucked’ as a girlfriend or maybe because he liked other girls sucking his dick more. Yeah, that happened before. You had caught Yuta and a random girl at a party and because he told you that he was too drunk to think and that he was sorry, you forgave him. You liked him too much to let go, which has been a problem since you were little. Letting go was too painful.

The second time you caught him, was with your roommate. Both sober as hell, but after he told you, that it was your roommate who jumped on him, you forgave him. Again. And now, after he cheated on her two times (maybe even more times, you didn’t know), he was the one who breaks up with you?

“Baby, I know you like him but you are worth so much more, right Jaehyun?!”, Wendy kicked Jaehyun’s leg under the table. Jaehyun who was sitting with his two friends couldn’t focus at the girls at that moment. He was thinking about his own broken heart. He didn’t talk about what had happened to him, you needed him, he tried to focus on you now, trying to forget his broken heart.

“Of course. You are too good for that fucking asshole. I’ve been telling you this since the day you introduced him as your boyfriend. I knew that he’s a bastard. And my offer to cut off his dick is still available, just saying.”, he finished his drink and saw their other friends coming in. “Let’s have fun tonight and forget about that stupid ass.”

“What about Dahyun? Isn’t she coming tonight?”, Wendy asked Jaehyun about his little crush, but little did she know that his little crush started dating someone. “No, she told me that she’ll be home for the weekend.”, and technically that wasn’t a complete lie. She was gone for the weekend, but not home.

Johnny, Joy, Mark and Doyoung came to your table and the mood got a little better. You stopped thinking of your broken heart and so did Jaehyun.

Later that night, they said their goodbyes and Jaehyun took you home. He always did. Not only because your apartment (in which you lived alone after that incident with your so called roommate) was not even 5 minutes away, it was because he wanted to keep his friend safe. He couldn’t sleep since you’ve known each other for so long, he needed to make sure your were home and safe.

You were infront of the building and you didn’t want to leave him. Youb felt alone and so did he. “Jae something’s wrong right?”, you turned to him. “What do you mean?”, he knew that you noticed that he was behaving different tonight.

“Do you want to come in and drink some cocoa with me?”, you knew that he would never say no to cocoa.

You were sitting on your balcony, with a glass of warm cocoa in your hands and a blanket around them. It’s not the first time that you were this close, but you were just friends, even though others didn’t believe that, but it was true. Just friends.

“Tell me what happened.”, you said after taking a sip. “It’s nothing- just- okay. Dahyun’s dating someone.”, saying this out loud hurt a little more and felt more real.

“Oh. I didn’t know, I’m sorry. I know you liked her.”

“It’s okay, I guess, maybe it’s my fault. I should have told her how I feel. But it doesn’t matter anymore.”, he looked up to the beautiful stars.

“No! It’s not your fault. She must’ve been blind. You are fucking great. There are so many girls who would do anything to be with you. You should wait a little, maybe it’s nothing serious. I don’t think that she’d start dating someone after spending so much time with you.”, you tried to cheer your friend up, nearly forgetting about your own heart.

You put your head on his shoulder and closed your eyes. “Maybe love isn’t something for us.”

“Maybe you are right.”, he closed his eyes too, and pulled you a little closer. Suddenly you felt warmer under the blanket, both of you thinking it was the cocoa, although it was your heart. You fell asleep in that position and you felt safer than ever before.

It’s been two weeks since Yuta broke up with you and you didn’t know how to feel. Of course you were hurt, but now you and Jaehyun were the only singles in your friends group which is why you’ve been spending more time together than before. He made you forget about him and you made him forget about her.

“I bought some wine and chinese takeout.”, he put the bags on the kitchen counter. “Perfect.”, you took out two wine glasses and chopsticks. The couch was ready for you and the movie, too.

“What are we watching tonight?”, he asked you, sitting down on the couch next to you. “Since tonight I’m choosing, we’re gonna watch 'My best friends wedding’ !”, you loved romantic comedies and he knew that you loved it so he watched it with you.

“He fucking loves her, like, he should just marry Julia Roberts. Man, what an idiot.”, while Jaehyun was angry at he ending of the movie, you were crying your eyes out. “Everytime I watch this movie I feel my heart breaking.”

You snuggled up to Jaehyun and he smiled at you. “You look ugly when you cry.”

“Ass.”, you got up, a little to fast, and fell back on his lap, Jaehyun pushes you away, because he felt you on his, well, on his dick. “How much wine- three bottles?! When did we drink so much?”, you got back up, not noticing that you just sat on his dick and cleaned the table. “You drank non stop, you didn’t even share with me.”, he helped you, taking the glasses with him to the kitchen, trying to ignore that you just sat on his dick.

Both of you tipsy, maybe even a little drunk, fell back on the couch, you put her head on his thigh and Jaehyun thought you were about to do something else “God- what are you doing?”, he pushed you, a little to hard, and you fell on the floor. “What the fuck Jaehyun? I was just laying down?”

You didn’t get up from the floor, sitting kind of between his legs, looking up at him. You were too tipsy to get back up. He had a perfect view, if he was honest.

“I thought- well, you.. shut up.”, he looked away, a girl was between his legs, looking up to him like you were about to suck his dick. It was already past midnight and you were a little sleepy, you yawned and that was too much for him. You looked ready, as if you were doing this on purpose.

“Stop it.”, he was hard. “What?- J-Jaehyun are you.. uhm.. are you hard?”, you looked at the bulge in front of your eyes and then back at him. “N-No?”, his ears got a little red and he took a pillow to hide his hard dick. “Why would you- oh..”, you got up and sat down, next to him. “Sorry I didn’t want to.. uhm.. you know.”

“N-No it’s alright.. I know that I’m hot.”, you teased him. His head turned to you. “Come on, yo did that on purpose didn’t you?”

“Are you crazy? No? I’m drunk?”, your eyes going slowly down to his hand on the pillow. You tried to focus on him but you must admit, it made you horny. Thinking that Jaehyun was horny next to you, because of you, made you horny.

“When was the last time you did it with a girl?”, you asked.

“It’s been.. a while.”

You looked at each other.

“Does it.. uhm hurt? I mean it looks unconfortable in those jeans.”

“A little.. I guess..”

Awkward silence.

“When was your last time?”, he asked you he slowly put the pillow away.

“A.. a couple months ago..”, it was with Yuta a couple months ago, before he cheated on you the first time.

“Do you.. I mean. uhm, do you want to do something about it?”, you looked down and then back up. “Do you?”, he asked you back.

“W-what?”, you heared him but you thought it was your imagination. “I asked.. if you want to do something about it.”, maybe it was the wine, maybe the pain.

But right then and there it didn’t matter, nothing mattered.

You nodded slowly and he pulled you on his lap, hands on your butt, both still looking deep into your eyes. You felt him pull you down to his crotch, to feel how hard you made him. “It’s just sex.”, he said. “Just sex.”, you agreed and then your lips met. First it was slow and careful. Your hands on his strong chest, slowly going down. His hand on your thigh, holding you tight and then his hand got under your shirt, his hand meeting your breast. You gasped with his touch and he used the opportunity to put his tongue into your mouth.

With your hands you opened his belt and unzipped his jeans. Jaehyun pulled your shirt over your head, looking at your beautiful breasts. You felt shy, it was the first time, he saw so much of your skin. He looked back into your eyes and then he leaned in to suck on your breast, your nipples getting harder and more senitive, you let out a moan and your head fell back.

His other hand playing with your other nipple. He kissed you up and stopped on your neck, kissing and sucking your skin. You hands in his hair, pulling it softly.

“I want you to fuck me, Jaehyun.”, you said, while you slowly moved your hips. He was harder than before. “Okay, I’ll fuck you.”, his hands back on your ass, he got up and made his way to your bedroom. He put you on the bed, looked down with his eyes full of lust and undressed himself. He was standing infront of you, completly naked looking like a greek god.

You also removed your clothes and looked at him. It was just sex. Sex between two horny friends.

“I’m gonna fuck you so hard, (Y/n). You won’t forget who made you feel so good.”, he was at the edge of the bed and kissed his way up to your pussy. He looked at your pussy and then back to you, not breaking the eyecontact as he slowly kissed every inch of your pussy. He sucked you so good, you thought you’d faint and as he put two fingers at once in you, you were moaning louder than ever before. “Fuck Jaehyun-”

He was fast and deep, hitting your g-point with every push. “Jaehyun- I’m gonna come, god!”, and the he stopped. “What the fuck?”, you were about to hit your climax. “I want you to come when I’m inside of you.”, he said with his husky voice.

“Do you want me to suck you off- holy shit!”, he didn’t need to get sucked off. He was hard enough to fuck you like that. “Fuck.”, he hissed as he sucked on your skin.

“Oh my god, Jaehyun! Fuck!”, he was fast and deep, hitting your right spot. “So fucking tight.”, it was too much for both of you, you were clenching around his dick and he was so big. It didn’t take long for both of you to come.

“I’m- fuck- I’m coming, oh god.”

“Me too, fuck. Fuck.”, and you came together. Both of you breathed heavily and were sweating. “Fuck I came in you.”, Jaehyun said as he rolled over.

“I-It’s okay, I’m on the pill, fuck.”

He went to the bathroom and got a towel, to clean you up. “Thank you.”

Jaehyun und you were too exhausted to talk about what just happened so you fell asleep next to each other.

Next day

He was the first to wake up. Jaehyun rubbed his eyes and looked down on him. He was naked, but why? Like a flash everything that happened last night was infront of his eyes. How he fucked his friend, and how good it felt. He looked to the left, you were still asleep and naked. Jaehyun tried to look away but you looked beautiful.

He couldn’t leave. If he left, you would think he regretted it or something- but he didn’t. He dressed up and decided to make breakfast.

Half an hour later you woke up. Your face red and your right side cold. Did he leave? Was your friendship over now? When Jaehyun suddenly opened the door, you looked silently at each other, until you noticed that you were still naked.

“Uhm.. I made breakfast.”, he kind of looked away and you took the blanket to cover yourself. It was so awakward. “'Okay. J-Just give me a second.”, you waited for him to leave but he didn’t get it.

You looked at each other for a couple seconds until he got it. “Oh, yeah, sorry.”,

“What the fuck, Jaehyun.”, he said to himself as he sat down at the dining table. You dressed up and went to the kitchen, you couldn’t walk properly. “Hi.”, you said as you sat down. “Hey.”

None of you talked. Youjust ate and looked down on your plate. After a couple minutes it was too much. “So we had sex.”, he said and looked at you.

You didn’t think he’d be so straight forward about it. “Uh, yeah.”

Awkward silence again.

“I can’t feel my legs.”, you said it to break the ice. He laughed at that “Sorry. Uhm.. You know it was just sex right? It’s not such a big deal. There are so many people who are friends and have sex, right?”, he asked as if he needed confirmation.

“Yeah of course. It’s like hanging out and watching a movie.”, did you just say sex is like watching a movie?

“You are absolutley right.”

Now it was just silence.

“W-would you do it again?”, you asked him, looking directly into his eyes. “Y-Yeah? I mean, we are friends, and sex is great? Why wouldn’t we do it again, right? No stupid feelings to confuse us. Just having a good time with a friend.”, it sounded so right, but was it?

“So we are like, friends with benefits now?”, you kind of liked the idea.

“If you want to.”

“Yeah, let’s do it.”

“Now??”, he was about to have a bite of his toast. “No, idiot, I mean let’s do the friends with benefits thing.”

“Oh, right. Give me your hand.”

You looked at him confused but still gave him your hand. He took your hand and looked into your eyes. “Sex, with no complicated feelings or stupid emotions, just sex. Two friends helping out each other.”

You nodded. “Just sex.”

And then you shook hands.

And that’s how the most complicated relationship started.

One month later

It’s been one month and nobody knew about the little thing between you and Jaehyun. When you hung out with your friends you were like how you were before the friends with benefits thing. Of course, you spent time together like before, watching movies and eating takeout food, but having sex whenever you felt like it. Sometimes you’d lie to your friends when you went to a party and would secretly fuck in the bathroom, or in his car, or sometimes in Johnny’s room when he was throwing another houseparty.

Just like right now.

“Fuck, (Y/n).”, you were on your knees sucking Jaehyun’s dick. The music at the party was too loud too hear his moans upstairs and the people too drunk to think of their two friends who were missing.

“You take my dick so well. I’m gonna fucking come inside of your pretty mouth.”, and so he did. You sucked him clean and were breathing heavily.

He softly pulled you up and kissed you. “I want to fuck you.”, he said as he placed kisses on your neck. “I want you to fuck me too-”, they were interrupted as someone tried to open the door. Luckily it was locked. “What the fuck?!”, Johnny yelled as he knocked on the door.

“Fuck.”, Jaehyun hissed and held your hand, he was so nervous and scared, he thought you’d get caught. “Jaehyun? What are you doing in my room?”, Johnny heared Jaehyun swearing. “John.. uhm I’m kinda busy in here.”

“Are you fucking jerking off in my bedroom?!”, Johnny yelled louder.

“No, you idiot.. I’m here with a girl.”, he yelled back. You looked down to your hands. “If you fucking make a mess on my bed I’m killing you.”, Johnny yelled before Joy could pull him to another room, well, to have sex, too.

Jaehyun didn’t notice how close he pulled you and how he held your hand. But as soon as he heared Johnny leaving he let go. “Woah that was fucking close.”

“Maybe we should leave.”, you said.

“Let’s stay a little longer, I don’t want them to notice anything. But fuck- let me make you come with my fingers now, and later I’ll fuck you so good. Is that alright for you?”, he was so gentle, even though he talked about fucking you, he always made sure you were okay with everything.

You smiled at him. “It’s alright, I can wait until we are home.” Even though it was unnecessary at that moment, he kissed you on the lips and opened the door. “Okay, baby, you can go out first, I’ll follow you a couple minutes later.”

You nodded and slowly looked outside, there was nobody and with that you ran out of the room.

Something felt strange. When he hold your hand and kissed you, you never kissed except while having sex. Weird.

Johnny’s house was big, he was a little rich, he’d say, the best college parties were at his house. You got yourself a drink and went to Mark and Doyoung. “Thought you went home.”, Mark said to you as you sat down next to him. “I was just getting some fresh air.”

A couple minutes later Jaehyun came back, he sat down, next to them and Mark and Doyoung wiggled their eyebrows at him. “Johnny texted us that you got some pussy.”, you chocked on her drink. They all looked at you “Sorry, too much vodka.”

“Johnny needs to shut the fuck up.”, Jaehyun said.

“Soo, who’s the lucky girl?”, they asked him, it was so awkward.

“None of your business.”, he took Doyoungs drink and finished it.

“She was that bad? Sorry man.”

“No she’s perfect.”, Jaehyun suddenly said. “I mean, it was great, now shut the fuck up or I’ll kick your asses.” Jaehyun looked away from the three. You were taken aback. He thought that you were perfect? How? Why? You?

As you looked away you noticed a familiar face coming to your direction.“Hey guys. Hey Jaehyun.”, Jaehyun looked to the owner of that voice. It’s been a while since he saw or talked to Dahyun.

“Yo Dahyun! Come sit with us.”, Mark invited her. “Sure, thanks.”, she was sitting next to Jaehyun and the two were sitting infront of you. It felt weird to look at them together. You didn’t like it.

Too caught up in your thoughts, you looked down on your legs, trying to ignore the hand on Jaehyun’s thigh which didn’t belong to you. It belonged to Dahyun, his crush. Did he like it? Did he want to have sex with her?

“Dahyun, babe. Let’s go.”, there he was, Dahyun’s boyfriend. Why would a girl with a boyfriend touch another man like that? You were angry.

“Sure baby. It was nice seeing you guys.”, she waved at you before she left with her boyfriend. Jaehyun didn’t know what to feel. Was he jealous? Did he even care? He didn’t know and he actually didn’t care.

“Do you want to go home, too?”, he softly asked you. “Yes, please.”

After saying goodbye to your friends, you left the party. None of you talked on your way home.

Back in your apartment, you took off your heels and went to your bedroom. You weren’t sure if you were going to have sex. Maybe he didn’t want to have sex with you. Maybe he wanted to have sex with Dahyun.

He closed her door and followed you to your bedroom. You were standing infront of your full body mirror and turned around to see the zipper on her back. Jaehyun saw you struggling with it and walked to you and turned you around. You looked at him through the mirror, how he slowly pulled the zipper down. He was looking at you now, right into your eyes. You could feel his breath on your skin and it gave you goosebumps.

He pushed one strap of your dress down and pressed little kisses on your skin, not breaking the eye contact. Then he pushed the other strap down and your dress fell down on the floor, exposing your body. You weren’t wearing a bra, just black lace panties. He looked up and down and his other hand found his way to your heat. Slowly playing with your clit and still kissing and sucking on her skin.

He pushed two fingers inside, faster and deeper than ever. You watched him fingering you and so did he. You could feel his hard member poking your ass and it became harder to stand as he fucked you so good with only two fingers. You closed her eyes and moaned. “Fuck.”

Jaehyun stopped fucking you with his fingers. “Open your eyes and watch me fucking you so well with my fingers, or I won’t make you come.”

You opened your eyes and looked at him. He was rough, you liked it.

He started fucking you harder with his fingers, It was hard to stand but he held you. He’d hold you and never let go.

“Fuck Jaehyun. I’m coming, oh god.”, with that you came on his fingers. He pulled his fingers out of your pussy and sucked on them, his eyes never leaving yours.

“I’m going to fuck you with my dick now, Can you stand a little longer for me, baby? Mhm? I’m gonna make you feel so fucking good, but you have to stand for me, is that okay for you?”, he was back to being gentle. “Yes. Please just fuck me.”

He took of his clothes and his dick was so fucking hard. Without a warning he pushed his complete length into you. “Oh fuck!”, his hands were holding you tight, he would leave bruises that was sure. Jaehyun fucked you from behind and you two looked at each other through the mirror.

“Fuck.”, he pushed in and out hitting your soft spot so hard. “Tell me, baby, who makes you feel so good?”

“You-! You Jaehyun. Fuck you are so big and deep inside of me, fuck.”

“Just like that baby, You take my dick so well in your tight pussy, (Y/n). Your pussy feels so good.”

One of his hands cupped your breast and played with it while the other still held you tight. “Fuck I’m gonna come.”

“Me too baby, come with me.” and with one last look at each other, you both came like never before. He filled you up with so much cum, as he pulled his dick out of you, it drippet down your legs.

“J-Jaehyun, I can’t feel my legs.”, you fell into his arms. “I’m sorry, baby. Was I too rough? Did I hurt you?”, He laid you on the bed and looked at you with concern in his eyes.

“N-No I liked it.. it’s just.. You were never this rough before.. Was it because.. Uhm.. Because of her?”, you asked him while he cleaned you up with a towel.

“I.. I don’t know. Maybe. I’m sorry that I let it out on you.”, he took the blanket and covered your naked bodies. “Do you still like her?”

He was silent for a moment. He thought about it. Did he still like her? He didn’t know to be honest.

“I don’t know. Let’s not talk about it now.”

You nodded and snuggled up to him, it was just sex but both of you liked to cuddle, just sex with a little cuddling.

Two months later

Everyone thought you were dating, even though nobody knew of your friends with benefits part. It was because of your relationship in general. You were touchy, not too touchy, even though you tried to leave space when you were with your friends. But you did everything together. You laughed together, cried together, even your little fights were cute. Joy knew that there was more than just being friends. friends didn’t act like that.

“So.. You and Jaehyun?”, one day Joy said, when you went shopping together.

“W-what do you mean?”, you hoped that they didn’t notice anything.

“So you guys are a couple right?”

“Uhm no? Why would you think that?”, you were driving to your aparment.

“The way yo two talk to each other or look at each other or just act towards each other in general. It’s so obvious that you guys like each other.”, Joy said casually.

“What are you talking about? You got it wrong, we don’t like like each other, we’re just friends with- I mean just friends. fuck..”, you were about to get out of the car, but Joy was faster and closed the doors.

“Stop right there.”, she said. “What the fuck were you about to say?!”

“Nothing?”

“I swear to god, If you don’t tell me what you were about to say. I’ll never talk to you again.”

“Fine! Bitch. We are something like friends with benefits. Are you happy now?”

“What the fuck are you saying?! You guys have sex?! Johnny said that it was possible but I thought it was just like dating, holy fuck. How is he?”, she wiggled her eyebrows.

“Oh fuck off! We promised not to tell anyone. Don’t you fucking tell Johnny!”

“I won’t tell him if you tell me how Jaehyun is in bed.”

“Fuck, fine! He’s like a fucking greek god. Sometimes he’s so fucking soft but the good soft and sweet and other times he fucks me I sometimes think I’m going to faint.”

“You mean like vanilla sex?”

“No like.. he says sweet things to me and is so gentle, kisses me everywhere, he makes sure i feel safe and good, like that kind of soft.”

“Baby, do you really think that sex is without emotions and feelings? Because it’s not. Sex is an emotion itself, I’d say. The soft sex you just described is to feel each other. He wants to make you to feel good because he cares. And you honey, you just talked about having sex with him like marrying him.”

Youu looked down, was Joy right? She couldn’t be. She shouldn’t be. You had a deal. It said just sex, but sex was an emotion. You felt feelings when you were with him, no matter while having sex or cooking.

“Oh hell no. Joy, I can’t let this happen. We made a deal, just sex!”, you were about to go mad.

“Baby, don’t worry, It’s not just You, I can feel it in my bones that Jaehyun’s feeling the same way. You’ll see tonight at the party. I’ll prove it to you. Now get out and get fucking dressed. You have to look hotter than ever before. Trust me.”

“Okay, I will.”

And you did, you wore a short silk red velvet dress. You never wore something like that before. It was Johnny’s birthday party so you were going alone because Jaehyun needed to help Johnny to get the house ready. It was a little after 8 when you arrived.

You got out of your car, pulling your dress a little down, then a little up to cover yourself a little better, but it was hard, the dress was too short. You got inside of the house and looked out for Joy. Your eyes met and Joy’s mouth fell open.

“Holy fuck. I said hot but this is beyond hot. God there’ll be so many dicks offered for you tonight.”, Joy winked at her. “Yo Joy- Holy shit, (Y/n), what in the world. Yo Doyoung look at her!”, Mark’s eyes were wide and now Doyoung’s too.

“Uhm, guys, it’s not my first time wearing a dress.”, you said, a little awkward.

“Yeah but, wow.”, Mark said eyes still wide. “Stop staring you pervert.”, Doyoung pulled mark with him. “Joy what’s taking you so long-”, Jaehyun came out of the kitchen, looking for Joy, but his eyes met yours. You in such a dress. Could you call that a dress? Your legs were nearly completely open and your neck, he scanned your body and saw that you tried to hide the hickeys he gave you. That was a mistake, he thought.

“Hi, Jaehyun.”, you said casually, well you tried to be.

“Uhm, hey. Joy, uh, Johnny’s looking for me. I mean for you, not me. You, his girlfriend.”, he couldn’t take his eyes off you, he saw you naked so many times, but everytime it felt like the first time.

“Thanks Jaehyun, I’ll see you guys later, and oh, (Y/n), there’s someone I’d like to introduce you to later.”

“What do you mean?”, Jaehyun asked before you could. “Oh just an old friend, who’s single, just like our (Y/n). I think it’s time for her to date again, don’t you think so Jaehyun?”, she tested him, but you were also curious of how he’d react.

“I don’t know. If she feels like it, why would I have to say something on that?”, he was awkward, and obvious, Joy could see through him.

“Yeah, right. I’ll see you guys later.”

Joy left you two standing there. You looked him and he looked at the floor. “Uhm, do you want to drink something?”, he asked you, still looking away.

“Sure.”, you tried to act calm, but you weren’t. Not only you looked amazing, he looked great, too. But for you, Jaehyun even looked great with just a hoodie. While you were still on your first drink, Jaehyun was already on his third. He tried to ignore the stares on your legs, or anywhere on your body. It made him angry, for whatever reason. He didn’t know why. But the worst is yet to come.

It was 11 when Joy pulled you away from her friends to introduce you to someone. Someone who wasn’t Jaehyun.

“So this is my friend I told you about, (Y/n), and this is an old friend of Johnny, Taeyong.”, Joy introduced you two. “Nice to meet you, you are prettier than Joy told me.”, he shook your hand slightly smiling at you.

“Nice to meet you, too. And thank you. Joy didn’t tell me anything about you, I’m sorry, right Joy?”, you glared at her. “Well now you guys can get to know each other, I’ll leave you alone, bye.”

Joy went back to your friends and saw Jaehyun staring at you and Taeyong. He was boiling, he didn’t know why, but he could punch a wall. Or Taeyong. Preferably Taeyong.

“They look good together, don’t you guys think so? He’s a really great guy, I think they could be a cute couple.”, Joy’s eyes wandered to Jaehyun who just finished his fourth drink, well he couldn’t remember, he lost count. “I think he looks like a fucking piece of shit.”, talking to himself, but Joy heard him.

Jaehyun looked back to you, you looked ethernal, but you smiled too often. Everytime Taeyong’s mouth moved you laughed. Why would you laugh? What was so funny?

“I think something is wrong with me.”, he said to Joy. “Yeah, it’s called jealousy.”, she said not so loud but he still heard it. He ignored her and got up to get another drink. He couldn’t stand looking at you having fun with someone else.

Thinking alcohol would stop that ache in his chest, he drank so much that night. As Taeyong put his hand on your knee, he had enough. He stood up, not caring if anybody was looking, went to you and took your wrist in his hand. “That’s enough for tonight. We are leaving.”

“Do you know that guy?”, Taeyong asked, hand still on your knee. You didn’t understand what was happening right now. “Uhm- I.. what?”

“Put your fucking hand away if you don’t want me to fucking break it.”, he pointed at Taeyong’s hand. “Who the fuck are you? Her boyfriend?”, Taeyong asked, while his hand got higher on your thigh. “Yes I fucking am you son of a bitch.”, Jaehyun let go of your and pushed Taeyong back.

“Jaehyun-”

Taeyong stood up and pushed him, too but Jaehyun was too drunk and If you didn’t hold him, he’d be on the floor. “If she’s your fucking girlfriend then act like her fucking boyfriend, you fucker. Sorry, (Y/n). I’ll see you around.”, Taeyong glanced at Joy and winked at her. Joy’s plan worked. She couldn’t hear anything because of the crowd and the music but the sign was enough.

“Let me take you home, okay?”, you looked up into Jaehyun’s eyes who was already looking at you.

He nodded and you brought him to her car, luckily you didn’t drink more than a little cup and were able to drive. None of you spoke, both of you confused as hell, Jaehyun kind of awake and asleep.

He called you his girlfriend. Did he mean it? You had so many thoughts and questions.

When they arrived you helped him out of the car and up to your apartment. You carried him to the couch and he fell on it. “I’ll make you some coffee.”

You left him in the living room and made him some coffee. You poured it into the cup but two hands stopped you. “I don’t need coffee.”, he whispered in your ear.

You wanted to turn around but you were trapped between his arms and his chest. “J-Jaehyun.”

“You shouldn’t have worn this dress, (Y/n).”, he said and gripped your waist, holding you tight.

“You shouldn’t have covered up those hickeys I gave you, (Y/n). They look so pretty on you.”, he turned you around and you felt so small infront of him. He looked down on youand she couldn’t look up to meet his eyes. His finger slightly stroked your neckline, where he placed the hickeys.

“They would show everyone that you aren’t fucking available. That you are fucking mine, (Y/n).”, he put his finger under your chin and slowly pushed your face up. “Are you mine, (Y/n)?”, you looked at each other. It was like music to your ears, to hear that he was jealous and that you were his.

“Yes I am.”

“Who do you belong to?”, he wanted, no, he needed to hear it.

“I belong to you, Jaehyun. Only you.”

You needed him. So much. “Good girl.”, he leaned in and kissed you. Like it was the last time. Like he would never taste you again.

That night it wasn’t just sex. It was loving each other, and feeling each other.

He kissed you, slowly and with so much passion. You wrapped your legs around his hips and he carried you to your bedroom. Jaehyun’s lips never left yours. The only light source in your room was the moonlight, shining brightly on you. He slowly undressed you and kissed every inch of your exposed neck, leaving little love bites.

You closed her eyes and let Jaehyun take control of your body. You were already wet enough, he couldn’t wait to be inside of you. Jaehyun needed you and you needed him. He was hovering above you and looked you in the eyes. Jaehyun slowly got inside of you, his eyes never leaving yours.

With one hand on your cheek, he stroked you and started kissing you again. You moaned into the kiss and opened your legs further to feel him closer. No words were exchanged, only heavy breathing and moaning could be heared.

The next morning when you woke up, you were alone. Jaehyun wasn’t in the bathroom nor in the kitchen, for the first time, he left. You were scared, a little, scared that he didn’t mean any of this. You loved him. You were so in love with him.

You wanted to give him a little time, you thought talking about last night with Joy would calm you a little down. Little did you know you weren’t the only one who thought it would be helpful to talk to someone.

“We’re just friends. Friends who fuck. I don’t see the problem here? We both agreed on this, it’s just sex. No feelings, no emotions & nothing more than sex.”, he said.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. Why her? You could fuck anybody. Why does it have to be a friend? How did you two even start this whole thing?”, Johnny and Jaehyun were leaning agains jaehyuns car as she walked over to them. But she stopped and listened to them. She needed to know what Jaehyun felt about it.

Jaehyun remembered the first time they slept together very well. It was awkward but a good awkward. It just felt right and both of them needed it at that moment, so why not?

“It’s different, I can’t explain it.”

“So you like her?”, Johnny asked.

“Of course not! As a friend? Yeah. And that’s it. Nothing more.”, he sounded disgusted. Was he disgusted?

“I don’t think that you are telling the truth. Did you see yourself last night? You were about to rip off Taeyong’s head, even though Joy planned the whole jealousy thing.”, Jaehyun remembered lats night pretty well. How he talked to you and what he said to you.

“You know, just because Yuta fucked her up I’m not the one who’s going to play her knight in a shining armor. I liked the sex, yeah. It helped me to forget about Dahyun she propably did the same with me because of him.”

“You used me to forget about her?”, Johnny and Jaehyun turned their heads and saw you looking at them. Hurt war written all over your face and tears were running down your cheeks. “I’ll leave you two alone.”, Johnny left you two, hoping that they would talk through everything.

“I uhm I didn’t know that you were listening..”, Jaehyun said. “What? If you knew would you call me your girlfriend again? Would you call me yours again?!”, you yelled at him.

“Stop yelling around. You are overreacting.”, Jaehyun tried to calm you down but he did the opposite. “Overreacting?! You fucking used me!”

“First of all, the things I said last night.. I only said that because I was drunk and horny. And second don’t act like you didnt use me too!”, you couldn’t believe your ears.

“I never used you like that. You were my friend. I wanted to be with you because I felt safe and loved! I didn’t even think once about Yuta, not even the first night! Y-You are so disgusting I can’t believe I fell in love with you!”, you yelled under tears.

“You- what? We made a fucking deal.”

“Go fuck you and fuck your damn deal!”, you pushed him away, even though you felt so weak. “I don’t want to see you ever again- you.. you- I can’t believe you. You destroyed this friendship or what the fuck this was all about. Just because that fucking bitch didn’t love you you didn’t have the right to use me!”

“Don’t call her that!”

“You are defending her now?! How can you be so blind?!”, Jaehyun glared at you, he was fucking furious.

“I am the blind one?! Your fucking boyfriend fucking cheated on you hundred times but you still went back to him! If I didn’t fuck you, you would go back to him, because your are so easy to fuck-”, you slapped him with the little power you had.

“Yeah I went back to him, not only once. But to you, I would never come back to you. I’d rather die.”, his hand was on his cheek, you just slapped him, he knew he desereved it, he really did.

You turned around and left him standing there, his hand on his cheek, all alone.

On your way home, you hoped that a car would run you over, to stop the pain. You always thoght that Yuta broke your heart, but this time, it really broke. It was the worst pain you have ever felt, your vision blurry, hands trembling, you opened the door to your home and fell on your knees and cried your heart out.

Jaehyun was scared. Scared to admit that he actually loved you, too. It didn’t make any sense to him. You were friends, nothing more nothing less. Well, that was once. Now he had lost not only his best friend but also the girl he actually loved. He was a real asshole, Jaehyun said things he shouldn’t have but it was too late now..

You didn’t show up to class. You didn’t even go to classes you didn’t share. You also kind of ignored your other friends, sometimes Joy called you but you weren’t in the mood. It’s been a week since your fight with Jaehyun and the only thing your’ve done so far was getting out of bed to go to the bathroom. You hated your apartment, everything reminded you of him.

Jaehyun noticed your absence. You never skipped classes, what if something had happened to you? No, Johnny would have told him.

“Hey Jaehyun, uhm, are you free tonight?”, it was Dahyun. He was sitting in class, minding his own business as she approached him. “Yeah, sure.”, why did she ask him if he was free? “Cool, I thought that we could go out and I don’t know, have dinner together?”, she smiled at him.

“You mean, uhm, like a date?”, he asked her and she nodded, her face slightly red. “But, what about-” “It’s over, well, it wasn’t a serious relationship in the first place, but whatever we can talk tonight about that, if you want to.”

“I’d love that.”

Jaehyun has a date tonight, he felt excited.. right?

A week later they were officially dating.

Nobody told you, too scared to hurt you more. Joy visited you sometimes and tried to get you out of the bed, but it was hard. “Come on, let’s go eat something. You have nothing here, aren’t you starving?”, Joy looked through your kitchen.

“I’m not feeling well. We can go to the supermarket If you want to make food, my last offer.”, and that was enough for Joy, she’d finally got you out of your apartment.

With sweatpants and a hoodie (which belonged to Jaehyun but you didn’t care) you went to the nearest supermarket. “I’ll look for some fruits for you, alright? Be right back.”, Joy thought that you needed some vitamins. And you really did. “Yeah, sure why not.”

While going through the supermarket with the shopping cart, you looked on the floor, not noticing that you hit something, well a someone, someone too familiar. “Oh sorry-”, you looked up and saw Jaehyun after so much time, it felt like forever. He stopped his movements and looked back at you. You looked, well, your eyes were red and you looked much thinner. But there were no emotions on your face. Of course he was here, the supermarket was in the middle of your homes and destiny hated you.

“Baby did you find the- oh hey (Y/n). It’s been so long.”, Dahyun came from behind, held Jaehyun’s hand and leaned against him. “H-Hi, yeah.”, your eyes wandered to their hands, Dahyun was holding tight, marking her territory.

“Are you alright? You look so, uhm, I don’t want to be rude, but you know what I mean, right? Were you sick? You weren’t in class either.”, did she just call you ugly? “Yeah, uhm, I was- am, still, sick.-”

“I got you some apples and strawberries and also- oh, uh, hi?”, Joy came with her hands full.

“You know you can come and have dinner with us two, right baby?”, Dahyun was fucking doing it on purpose.

“What? I don’t think that-”, he started but you interrupted him. “You know, we are really sorry but we are going on a doubledate tonight, sorry, right Joy?”, you said through your gritted teeth. “Yeah, right.”

A doubledate? You and who? Who would you go on a date with? Is it yuta again? Jaehyun asked himself- but why did he care?

“We’ll see you guys around, then. Have fun.”, you were about to throw punches at her. Fake bitch, you thought. Without saying anything back you walked away, not looking at Jaehyun, completely ignoring him.

“I’ll never go out, I fucking knew that it was a bad idea to leave my bed.”, as soon as you entered your home, you left the bags on the floor and went back to your room to get into your bed. “Why in the world were they shopping together? He got back to her so fast? Fucking asshole.”

“Uhm, about that.. They are dating.”, Joy told you as she layed beside her friend. ��We thought it would be better not to tell you, I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright, just, I can’t believe he just broke my heart like that and is now dating her? Didn’t he like me even a tiny bit?”, you covered your face, trying to stop yourself from crying.

“Honey, I really don’t know, like, one time he looks like he’d fight against the world for you and then he tells you that bullshit. Johnny told me that he doesn’t talk about what happened between you guys at all.”

After a little while Joy spoke up again “You know, maybe we should really go on a doubledate tonight.”

“I look like shit, even that bitch Dahyun tolt me that. I don’t feel like going out..”

“Oh shut up, I’m calling Taeyong.”, Joy ignored her friend and called him. “Hey are you free tonight? Great, what do you think of a doubledate? With (Y/n)? Yeah, it’s her. No they are not.. Perfect, I’ll send you the adress. See you later.”, she hung up and grinned at her friend. “He sounded excited.”

“How much time do we have?”

“2 and a half hours.”, Yeri jumped out of her bed. “Fuck.”

While you were showering, Joy called her boyfriend, Johnny. Tonight was going to be amazing.

After the two of you got ready, Joy borrowed a dress from you, you waited for your dates to arrive. “This is going to be so awkward after what happened the last time I met him.”, you thought about going back to your bed.

“Oh shut up, he is great you are great, trust me, it’s gonna be great.”

And after five minutes their dates were waiting outside your apartment. You were nervous, really nervous but as soon as you saw Taeyong smiling at you, she relaxed.

“You two look amazing.”, Johnny and Taeyong said at the same time. “Thank you, you too.”, the girls said. Joy got into Johnny’s car. “We’ll see you guys at the restaurant.”, she winked at you.

You didn’t say anything, you were a little awkward next to him, he looked so good and you felt, well you felt ugly.

Taeyong opened your door, to help you get in and you thanked him as you got in. After he got inside of the car you started talking to him again. “I’m sorry that Joy called you so spontaneous, you probably had better things to do..”, you looked down to your hands on your lap.

“No, I’m happy that she called me. I wanted to see you again anyway.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I liked talking to you. I’d like to get to know you more.”, he smiled at you and looked back on the street again.

“Thanks.. me too.”, for the first time in weeks you smiled.

Johnny and Joy were the first to arrive, well not the first but, nobody thought that this was supposed to be tripledate. “What the fuck Johnny?”, Seulgi whispered to her boyfriend as she saw Jaehyun and Dahyun at the restaurant.

“I was talking to him when you called and I don’t know he insisted and then she heared about the doubledate and wanted to come, too. I’m sorry.”, Johnny tried to smile to his girlfriend as he explained himself.

“Hey Joy! Look it’s a tripledate, isn’t that lovely?”, Dahyun hugged her, Joy saw a long night coming.

“Yeah and I thought I was the only one who loved his music-”, (Y/n) who was talking to Taeyong stopped on her way to the table. Why in the world would he be here?

“It’s uhm, a tripledate! Isn’t that cool?”, Dahyun saw you and hugged you, too. What the actual fuck?

Taeyong took your hand, knowing the situation was complicated.

Johnny sat infront of Joy who was sitting next to you and next to you Taeyong. Jaehyun right infront of you and on his right was Dahyun. Awkward combination.

“You know, we can leave if you feel uncomfortable.”, Taeyong whispered into your ear, leaning a little to you, still holding your hand. Jaehyun tried to focus on his own date, his girlfriend, but he felt something he couldn’t explain as he saw you being so close to that guy.

“No, I’m fine thank you.”, you smiled at him.

After a little awkward silence, you ordered your food and the silence was back again.

Johnny couldn’t stand it. “So uhm, how did you two met?”, he asked Taeyong and you.

“Babe that was on your birthday, you were there.”, Joy told her boyfriend. ’“Right..”

Taeyong didn’t care about the others actually, he wanted to talk to you and that is what he did. He slightly turned to you and started asking you about your favourite music and movies.

“'Really? I love him, I think post malone is great. What do you think of The Weeknd?”, he asked you. “Sexy music, I love him.”, was all you said. “Taste.”, he said and was so excited to talk to you about your favourites.

Jaehyun was tense, Johnny, well everyone except Taeyong and you noticed. “Baby, do you want some salad?”, Dahyun, who was just eating a salad, asked Jaehyun. He hated salad. How could someone just eat salad? He looked over to your plate. You ordered pasta, he knew that you loved it.

“I don’t like salad.”, he said and focused on his steak.

You felt bad, Dahyun was eating a salad and here you were eating pasta, you felt ugly and now you felt fat. Suddenly feeling full, you asked Taeyong if he wanted to have some pasta.

“I’ll try one but you have to eat up okay? You look thinner than the last time we met.”, he said with a smile, he was concerned.

Did you really look thinner? You didn’t feel like it, even though you didn’t eat anything proper for a while now. You nodded with a smile and suddenly Jaehyun stood up.

“Excuse me. I’ll be right back.”, he went inside of the restaurant, to the restroom.

“What the fuck is wrong with you Jung Jaehyun?”, he asked himself as he looked to the mirror, suddenly remembering the night he had sex with you infront of the mirror.

You ignored him the whole dinner, as if he didn’t excist and that made him fucking angry. As he got back to the table, he noticed Taeyong’s arm around your backrest.

Too close.

“Welcome back baby, I ordered us some wine.”, Dahyun smiled at her boyfriend who didn’t look pleased. “I’d prefere something stronger.”, and then he ordered something stronger, something to help him ignore that feeling in his chest, whenever he heard you laughing or talking to Taeyong.

You were eating their dessert as Jaehyun was finishing his third drink. Dahyun pushed her cake to Jaehyun, she only took a little piece. “That’s enough for me tonight, can you finish it for me?”

“Why do you order it when you’re not going to eat it in the first place? Just eat that stupid cake.”, you would eat the cake all alone, he thought, but he looked over to you and saw you sharing the cake with Taeyong.

“I can’t eat so many carbohydrates at this hour, you know that, baby.”, she tried to act ladylike. God how he hated her when she did that. Who cares?! It’s just cake.

“Why would you fucking order it then?”, now he was a little louder. “Jaehyun, calm down. It’s just cake. Let me finish it, if you two don’t want it.”, Johnny tried to calm his friend.

Taeyong and you noticed the tension and decided it’s time to go. “Thank you for tonight, but it’s time for us to leave.”, Taeyong stood up and helped you, too.

“You guys are leaving already?”, Dahyun said. Jaehyun looked down to his drink. From the corner of his eyes he saw Taeyong holding your hand.

“Uh, yeah, we want to spent a little time alone.”, he didn’t say it to make Jaehyun angrier, but it did make him angry.

“Good night, and thank you Joy, I’ll see you.”, you said goodbye and went with Taeyong to his car. The whole night you tried to ignore Jaehyun, which was hard, because you could feel his feet under the table. You tried to focus on Taeyong and Joy and Johnny and most of the time it worked.

“I’m sorry, for that. I didn’t know he’d be here too.”, you told Taeyong. “It’s alright, I know it must be hard.”

“You made it easier.”, you genuinely smiled at him as he helped you into the car. “You want to go back home or can I have you for myself just a little longer. Don’t worry, no bad intentions.”

You laughed at his comment “I’d love to.”

And then he took you to the Han river.

“You know, that night Joy asked me to help you out with that guy, you, uhm, you actually helped me out, too.”, Taeyong sighed as he confessed.

“What do you mean?”, you were confused. “Well, there’s a girl..”, he blushed.

“Lee Taeyong did you use me to make a girl jealous? Now I don’t feel that guilty anymore.”, you smiled at him. You weren’t mad, why should you?

“Kind of. I don’t know. I don’t even like her- I hate her.”, he looked up to the sky, a little smile on his lips. “Or maybe I want to hate her.”

“Now I’m curious, who’s that girl?”

“Her name is Seulgi. I’ve known her for years now and the thing between us.. I don’t know.. We were cruel to each other in all those years. I said some ugly things, but she hurt me, too. I thought after high school, I’d never see her again but we applied to the same college. Even now we are fighting like there’s no tomorrow..”, Taeyong’s mind drifted to his time in high school.

“Are you sure that there’s no reason for your fights?”

He thought going through everything in his head once again. “Maybe it was becaus I rejected her 2 times.”

“You- what?!”

“Yeah she confessed to me in middle school and in high school but I rejected her everytime and I don’t even know why. Next thing I knew she started dating a friend of mine and I hated her for that, I didn’t want her to date him.”

“You are an idiot. You didn’t want to be with her and you didn’t want her to be with someon else. You broke her heart and she decided to move on. She probably didn’t even love that guy.”

“I don’t even know what to do. She stopped talking to me after Johnny’s birthday. I think I went to far..”, you facepalmed yourself.

“I’m sorry, but it is so obvious that you guys love each other. Don’t waste more time. You are a great guy and you should tell her what you feel and how much you actually love her.”, you smiled at him while staring at the sunset.

“You are right. Ugh, I wish I could beat my 15 years old self up- and my 18 years old self. I broke her hearts so many times, I want to be happy with her now. I want to make her smile and I want her to know that I love her, always have and always will.”

You applauded, “Congratulations, now go get that girl or I will throw you into the han river, idiot.”

“I will. I will get my girl but first I’ll take you home.”

After his car stopped infront of your apartment, Taeyong the gentleman he is, helped you out of the car. He accompanied you to your door and hugged you tightly.

“Thank you for opening my fucking eyes, lifesaver.”, he was the happiest.

“Thank you for saving me from that idiot today, too. Keep me updated!”

Little did you know, that there was a certain someone watching you hug and smile. After the hug, Taeyong jumped back into his car and drove away, to confess his love.

You smiled, you were happy for him. Happy that he found his love.

As you were about to open the door, you heard someone talking.

“(Y/n)..”, the smell of alcohol was so intense, you felt drunk all of a sudden.

You tried to get into your apartment but the grip on your wrist stopped you. You tried to get out of his grip but he was strong, too strong.

“Will you let me in, (Y/n)?”, he got a little closer.

“Did you miss me, (Y/n)?”, you could feel his chest against your back, his breath on your exposed neck. You closed your eyes, yes you missed him but that didn’t change anything. You missed the old Jaehyun, your friend, before anything happened between you.

With all the energy left in your body, you stepped on his foot and rushed inside but before you could close the door, his hand stopped you. He was much stronger than you and he probably didn’t even feel that you stepped on his foot.

You glared at him, trying not to cry or punch him. “Talk to me. Tell me to leave. Tell me to get out.”, as he got inside, you felt getting smaller and smaller next to him.

Jaehyun slammed the door shut and made you flinch. There was nothing you could do, except for ignoring him. You turned around, you removed your heels and went to the kitchen. You needed water.

Of course he followed you. As you poured water into you glass, he stood next to you and watched you. “You are behaving like a fucking kid. Do you think ignoring me is funny?”, you still ignored him, as you were about to take another sip, Jaehyun suddenly took the glass away from your hand and threw it on the floor, breaking it into many pieces.

“Fucking talk to me! Scream or yell I don’t fucking care! But don’t ignore me for fuck’s sake!”

He is drunk, he doesn’t know what he’s doing, you tried to calm yourself down. But Jaehyun was always like this, drunk or not, he liked destroying things, breaking them apart.

He took another glass that was on the counter and threw it on the floor. “You make me so fucking mad! SAY SOMETHING!”, it scared you when Jaehyun was angry but you wouldn’t give in. Not this time.

You backed away, accidentally stepping on a piece of the broken glass. “Fuck.”, you whispered to yourself, trying to move away from the other pieces. Blood dripping on the floor, Jaehyun’s eyes focused on your movements, not noticing that you were in pain.

You took a step, but the pain was too much. Before you could fall, Jaehyun held you by your waist as you winced in pain. Jaehyun saw the blood dropping, his heart clenched.

“Don’t look down. Close your eyes.”, he knew that you couldn’t look at blood.

You did what he said and fell into his arms, the smell of blood was too much for your.

Jaehyun carried you to the couch in the living room, softly putting you down. “I-I’ll be back, don’t open your eyes.” Jaehyun was in her bathroom, looking for stuff to clean your wound. Jaehyun tried to ignore the voice in his head that insulted him.

He came back with some cotton, disinfectant and bandage.

The piece of glass wasn’t that big and deep inside, after sterelizing the material he used, he tried to take it out of your foot with a pair of tweezers. “T-This could hurt a little.”

Jaehyun tried his best to stay calm and do it as softly as possible, not wanting to hurt you more than he already did. He placed the piece on a tissue and cleaned your wound with the cotton. You hissed, the pain was too much and now it burned like hell.

“I-I’m sorry.”

He blowed at the wound, trying to erase the pain. Jaehyun bandaged your foot and looked up to your face. You cried. Was it because your foot hurt or because of him? It didn’t matter, everything was his fault.

Jaehyun carried you to your bed, suddenly remembering the great time he had here. Not just the sex- it was everything. The deep talks, the movie nights- he missed it.

You were asleep in his arms, he looked down at your perfect face. He tugged you in your bad, carfully.

He can’t remember that he fell asleep in her living room, but he did, which suprised you the next morning.

As you woke up, you tried to walk but remembered your foot, feeling the pain once again. “Fuck!”, you screamed angrily, waking Jaehyun up. He opened his eyes slowly and saw you trying to walk out of her room.

What am I doing here? What is going on? How did I end up sleeping on her couch? Why was she limping?

Ignoring him, you made your way to the kitchen, it was a mess. You couldn’t walk properly, how were you supposed to clean this mess? You leaned against the counter, trying to steady yourself without stepping on glass, again.

Jaehyun stood up and hovered behind you. He looked down to your foot, a bandage and on the kitchen floor was blood and glass.

“D-Did I do that?”, he stuttered. Guilty, he felt so guilty and angry at himself. How could he hurt you? How could he do that to you?

You didn’t answer.

“Of course it was m-me. Y(Y/n) listen I-”, he tried to hold you, he saw that it was hard to stand.

“No! You listen! You want me to talk to you?! To scream and yell at you?! Huh?! Okay! If that is what you want! Stop fucking saying my name! Stop talking to me! Stop being near me and stop fucking looking at me! What do you want from me? What did I do to deserve all this?! All I did was to love you! Why the fuck are you infront of my house at midnight even though you have a girlfriend?! When I said I won’t come back to you, I meant it!”, you cried and yelled at the same time.

“D-Don’t date him.”, was everything he said.

“Are you even fucking listening to me?!”

“Yes! But I have no answer to your questions! I don’t know what I want! I don’t fucking know why I am here and why I can’t fucking stop thinking about you, or missing you! I don’t know why I am so fucking jealous when I see you with someone who isn’t me! I don’t know why I think about you when I am next to Dahyun I don’t know why I wish that she was you.. I-I don’t know.. what this feeling is.. I’m s-so scared it is eating me alive.”

“I-I think you should leave.”, you looked away, tears falling down. He couldn’t just tell you those things and don’t know what it meant. Jaehyun has a girlfriend, Jaehyun made it fucking clear when he told Johnny that he didn’t like you in that way and that he isn’t a replacement for Yuta.

He never was. You loved Jaehyun in a way you never thought was possible. Why was it so hard for everyone to love you? Were you that terrible?

“B-But-”

“Go to your girlfriend, Jaehyun.”

You didn’t tell Taeyong or Joy or any of your other friends what happened between you and Jaehyun that night- and morning. You tried to forget about it, but the pain in your foot reminded you always, or maybe it was the pain in your heart.

After Jaehyun left your apartment he went to Dahyun and broke up with her. Yes he wanted to date her for so long, yes he liked her. But that was in the past. It wasn’t a bad breakup, Dahyun saw it even coming and didn’t really care, she knew that there was someone else on his mind all the time. It seemed like everyone knew except Jaehyun.

“Yeah they’re talking, man I can’t believe it, I really thought it would be the last time.”, someone said as Jaehyun was drinking his water in the cafeteria with his friends.

“Yeah right, seems like (Y/n) loves Yuta’s dick.”, some girl said now behind Jaehyun. What was going on?

“Can I get my 5 bucks, I told you they’d start dating again. (Y/n) has a thing for that guy, well, after I fucked him I can tell why.”, another girl said, which made Jaehyun jump from his seat.

“What the fuck are you talking about?!”, he screamed at her. “What the fuck?”, she said. “What do you mean Yuta’s back with (Y/n)?!”, he screamed again, and slammed his hands on the table.

“They are outside talking, you asshole. What the fuck’s wrong with him.”, the girls hissed as he slammed his hand again. “If you fucking bitches ever say anything about her again, I won’t be this nice again.”

Without looking back at his friends Jaehyun ran out of the cafeteria, his eyes looking everywhere.

“Where the fuck are you, (Y/n)?”, he mumbled.

Jaehyun stepped outside the building and saw you on a bench. He rushed there but stopped walking as he heard your words.

“Am I a horrible person?”, you asked Yuta.

“Are you crazy? You are way too good for guys like us. You deserve someone way better than me and Jaehyun, we are stupid and blind. (Y/n), I was too selfish to love you like you deserved it.”

“Thank you.. I-I wasn’t sure If I really should talk to you but now I’m glad I did. Everyone I loved in my life, left me. Maybe It’s just not meant to be for me to be loved.”

“Can you leave us alone, Yuta?”, Yuta and you turned your heads and saw Jaehyun with teary eyes standing close behind you.

“Do you want me to leave, (Y/n)?”, you sighed and nodded.

“Remember what I told you.”, Yuta smiled lightly at you and left afterwards.

“Can I sit down?”, Jaehyun asked now. You shrugged your shoulders. “Yeah..”

“Yuta’s right.. I mean, I still hate him, but he is right. You are too good for guys like us. When we started hanging out, just the two of us, I was scared that it would lead to more. I was scared to lose you and scared to hurt you. And guess what? Both happened. I lost you because I hurt you because I fell in love with you.”

Now you looked at him, hearing these words for the first time.

“I swear to god I didn’t know it was possible to love someone as much as I love you, and I never thought it was possible to hate someone as much as I hate myself. I hated Yuta -still do, but I hate myself more because this time I was the one who hurt you and broke your heart, your beautiful heart which only loves and I know that I don’t deserve your love but I still love you. I hate myself for taking so long, I hate myself for letting you suffer, but I promise you, If you let me, I’ll give you the world.”, tears falling down his cheeks, he didn’t care if anybody saw him crying like a little boy who lost his favourite toy car.

“I said things I didn’t mean. Not now, not back then. I’ll regret them forever but I’ll never regret telling you how much I love you.”

Your brain stopped working. Did he just confess? Did he just tell you all of that?

“J-Jaehyun-”, you didn’t even notice that you were sobbing.

“I- I know you said you’d never come back to me, but please come back to me because I can’t breathe without you. Come back to me and let me love you the way you deserve.”, his hands hand on your cheeks, slighlty stroking your tears away.

“Jaehyun I-I don’t know what to s-say, please never break my heart again.”

“I won’t, I promise you. I love you.”, he pulled you closer, looking into your beautiful eyes.

“I love you, too.”

That was what he needed to hear. He kissed your tears away, then your forehead, then your cute nose and finally your lips. You kissed so many times already, but this time it was different, it was with so much passion and love. A kiss both of you will never forget.

You laid in your bed, no sex just cuddling and kissing. “Wait- what about Dahyun?”, you broke the kiss. “I’m kissing you and you are asking me about my ex?”, he laughed as you laid your head on his chest.

“After that one night I came here, the night I, uhm, hurt you.”, he’ll never forget the look on your face as he made a mess of your kitchen and how he hurt you.

Your hand on his chest now cupped his cheek. “It’s okay, Jaehyun. Don’t say it like you stabbed me with it yourself or something. It was an accident.”

“N-No, If I didn’t act all crazy and broke the glasses, you’d never get hurt. I’m sorry.”, his voice got smaller as he apologized.

You looked up, your eyes meeting his. “I love you. Please don’t do this to yourself.”, you placed a kiss on his lips. “Tell me how you broke up.”, you tried to distract him.

“Well, we fought, I knew that you are the only one I need in my life. She wasn’t my type anyway. Remember the restaurant? Who the fuck orders a salad?”, that made you giggle.

“What is your type?”

“You.”, he stroked your hair.

“Why? Why do you love me?”, you asked.

“Because you are you. You are my best friend, my better half- my soulmate. You laugh at my stupid ass jokes- not even I think that they’re funny. Everytime I look into your eyes, I feel peaceful and happy, I can breathe next to you and be a little kid, the way you eat- it’s crazy i know, but you look so adorable. I love how you eat anything you want and how you cry or laugh at any movie we watch. A comedy? You cry. A romance? You cry and laugh and a horror movie? You cry, laugh and hold me tight because you get scared so easily.”

“Why.. why are you so.. are you even real?”, you hid your face into his neck and cried.

“Baby, do you remember our first night? We watched 'my best friends wedding’ and I swear to god he loved her so much but I know he was scared. I watched it a couple times when we were.. apart, and I knew that I couldn’t live without you. I couldn’t imagine losing you- the thought of you marrying someone else, I don’t even want to talk about it, because I’m the only one marrying you.”

“A-Are you asking me to be your wife right now?”, you couldn’t believe your ears.

“Yeah, don’t worry baby, I already have a ring.”

“J-Jaehyun are you serious?”, you got up and looked at him with wide eyes. “I’m kidding baby. Still got no ring, but I’ll promise you that I’ll marry you.”

“I love you so much, oh god.”, you hugged him tightly and tangled your legs with his and placed kisses on his jaw and neck.

“You know baby.. I love having sex with you, too.”

“Of course you do..”, you looked each other deep into the eyes and kissed, nothing mattered anymore, you loved each other so much, sometimes it felt unreal.

Spending the rest of your lives together was everything you wanted, together forever.

2K notes · View notes

leejeongz · 4 years

Text

treasure as your boyfriend - maknae line (asahi-junghwan)

hyunsuk-jaehyuk ver.

asahi: the “chaotic neutral” boyfriend

♡ his favourite date- the studio

♡ you can be as noisy or as quiet as you want. he works best when you’re with him, so he’s forever inviting you over. and he produces his best work when he’s around you and thinking about you. all the feelings he’s too shy to say to you come out in art form. you often get to hear and see everything before anyone else too.

♡ skinship- really not a fan of pda, but will allow himself to link arms with you in public if you want to. he would never force skinship for the sake of it but if your head naturally rested on his shoulder or if you snuggled up to him during a movie, i think he’d secretly like that. he really just likes casual hands brushing against each other, he gets butterflies whenever your hands come near him

♡ his love language- receiving gifts- he likes giving gifts too, but receiving them makes his heart flutter. you remembering little things about him makes him smile like a whole lot, especially when it’s something that he doesn’t even remember telling you or something of little importance.

♡ kisses- quite spontaneous but always very soft and meaningful. he’s so gentle with you, especially during kisses. his lips are super soft and so are his hands that rest on your hips. he was a little nervous for your first kiss so he kept his eyes open which spooked you a bit but now it’s a inside joke between you two.

♡ he does what he wants, you do what you want, he likes that and thinks it’s the best setup for the relationship because being clingy could make you hate each other

♡ he draws you. a lot. you might not know it, but you became his muse from day 1 and everything he draws has you in it

♡ when you've had a bad day, he sings for you and has lots of evident sympathy no matter what the issue is

♡ he’s VERY goofy around you. it takes him a while to become used to people so seeing that side of him makes you really soft. and if he knows you’re the same and you start acting a little more goofy, he starts to become even more comfortable around you.

yedam: the “your success is my happiness” boyfriend

♡ his favourite date- ice skating

♡ or anything wintery because 1 he likes to keep you warm, 2 he thinks you look cute all wrapped up in puffy jackets and jumpers and 3 it's not too hot to hold hands the entire time hehe. oh and also expect some singing from him if you get any alone time.

♡ skinship- a huge cuddly boy. he wants to be touching you all the time but he respects your want for space and privacy so he doesn’t. he LOVES holding hands, he’d do it all day if he could. seeing your cheek squished against his shoulder makes his heart melt too, so he takes pictures of it so it lasts longer hehe. he sometimes does that really cute thing where he links pinkies with you too 🥺

♡ his love language- physical touch- the way he just wants to be touching you all the time and you don’t get mad makes him SO happy. when you sit close to him, his heart races, never mind when you finally give him a hug or hold his hand. a lot of your relationship is long distance, even if you lived in the same house, he’d barely ever be there, so getting to cuddle you or be held by you is something that he looks forward to.

♡ kisses- if he’s refusing a kiss there’s something seriously wrong. his lips would constantly be attached to you if you let them. he likes holding hands during kisses and rubbing his thumb on your finger just for extra feels. omg eskimo kisses are his FAVOURITE. especially when his nose is cold just to tease you a bit

♡ he loves to secretly take pics of you and set them as his background because he thinks you look so adorable. we know he has a photography insta out there somewhere (drop the @ bro) and you’d be in like all of the pictures

♡ he writes love letters to you. they’re a little cringe so he signs them off as anonymous but obviously you know who they’re from since… well he’s your boyfriend

♡ he helps you study and build your confidence. he lets you borrow his notes and present stuff to him all the time, always giving positive and constructive feedback.

♡ he celebrates even the tiniest of achievements with you and shows you that there’s more to life than winning all the time

♡ if he can’t already speak your native language, he’d learn a few sentences and phrases like “i love you” and surprise you with them sometimes

doyoung: the “romantic but childish” boyfriend

♡ his favourite date- breakfast/brunch

♡ just making sure you get the most important meal of the day lol. it sets you both up for the rest of the day, especially if you can’t meet again until the day after. it also gives you chance to reflect on anything that may have happened that day before that you were maybe too sensitive to talk about previously.

♡ skinship- not the biggest lover of skinship but he isn’t opposed to it if you initiate it. he’s definitely one who prefers privacy so pda is off the table. he likes holding hands and staring into your eyes because they’re so pretty. ugh he’s so flirty and romantic 🤪

♡ his love language- acts of service- he’s a busy guy, he really appreciates when you do even the smallest of things for him like folding his clothes so they don’t get creased. your kindness is so attractive to him, it really confirms that he’s found the one.

♡ kisses- his kisses are a little messy but they’re always passionate. he just can’t contain his need for his mouth to be on yours, which actually happens quite frequently when you two are alone. he does that thing where he puts his hands on your waist, smiles at you flirtily, then pulls you in closer for the kiss which leaves you speechless every time.

♡ has your contact name in his phone set to just a heart and the picture is one that he secretly took of you on a date

♡ one of his favourite things to do is teaching you how to dance. whether you can already dance or not, he’s gonna teach you. just gives mr no skinship a chance to put his hands on you

♡ FLOWERS! he knows that not everyone is a fan of flowers but you will be while he’s around

♡ hands down the cheesiest person you know and usually you’d be cringing but because it’s him, it’s okay

♡ he’s always down to chat with you. at 1am, while he’s working or even when he’s with his family, he’ll drop anything to make you happy.

haruto: the “cool on the outside” boyfriend

♡ his favourite date- watching youtube

♡ you can learn a lot about a person by watching things they like to watch and taking an interest in something they’re interested in. you pair can share youtubers you think the other would like and just have a laugh together while being all cozy in bed.

♡ skinship- any and all skinship is appreciated by this guy, not that he’d tell you that. he secretly wants to cuddle with you all the time and hold your hand everywhere you go, but he always makes out like you’re the one who wants it by saying stuff like “gosh your hands are always so cold, here i’ll warm them for you”. his favourite are hugs where he just melts into your arms after a long, tiring day practicing. sometimes they’re just want he needs

♡ his love language- quality time- he wants to spend every second of every day with you. he wants to talk to you more on a one to one basis and he wants that time to be focused. when he finally gets time alone with you, he doesn’t waste any of it and gets straight to making memories with you that he thinks about all the time.

♡ kisses- longer kisses are super rare because he’s still quite timid and shy but the small little pecks?? he cannot get enough of them. he prefers to give them to you at random, surprising times because he likes it when you melt after it, he calls you cute every time awwww. he secretly enjoys when you kiss him in front of the members too even if he acts disgusted.

♡ ends all his messages to you with a heart WITHOUT FAIL

♡ helps you shop for clothes and jewellery. he picks out clothes for you and always manages to hit the mark

♡ creates a playlist of songs that have a special meaning within your relationship and constantly updates it

♡ does that thing where he gets so happy that you’re his that he can’t stop smiling, so much so that he can’t sleep

♡ he’s a little bit forgetful, but you always forgive him because he’s just so cute and he always makes it up to you anyway

jeongwoo: the “best friend” boyfriend

♡ his favourite date- skateboarding

♡ even if neither of you can skate, it’s fun and you can learn together. having fun when he’s with you is always the aim so anything like that is something he really enjoys

♡ skinship- skinship happens very naturally for you pair and it’s something neither of you have ever shied away from. he loves it when you hold hands and it makes him feel super proud that you can show him off like that. also loves when you let him rest his head in your lap and play with his hair.

♡ his love language- quality time- creating special moments with you is something that he will never forget and something that he’ll always bring up. he’s so grateful that you want to be with him and around him even at the most randomest times when you could be doing something else, but he loves it and he doesn’t ever want to see you leave.

♡ kisses- most are short and sweet but some, rare kisses can last for a while, where he smiles onto your smile because he just can’t believe what’s happening. he really likes those kisses but doesn’t initiate them all too often because he’s worried it’s the wrong moment. he actually asks the older boys for advice too 🥺

♡ tries to tease you and get the members involved but it always ends up backfiring and he ends up being the target

♡ a “remember when” type of guy, bringing up some of your most favourite and fondest memories

♡ is always up for absolutely anything you suggest. you’re the worst influences on each other (in the best way) but without those experiences, you wouldn’t have the amazing memories you have today

♡ wants to act like your protector and had you fooled for like a week until you realised he’s the one that needs protecting.

♡ when you compliment him, his actual self esteem sky rockets. there’s no more joking about how cool he is. your words mean the most to him (maybe his love language is words of affirmation too who knows hehe)

junghwan: the “first” boyfriend

♡ his favourite date- gaming together

♡ he loves to teach you and compete with you (because you let him win) and he thinks it’s cute and funny when you make mistakes or you do something really impressive

♡ skinship- he’s shy about it at first but warms up to it later. he never initiates anything because he doesn’t wanna overwhelm you. he doesn’t really like pda but he’ll do it for you, he’ll put his arm around your waist while you walk because it feels the most comfortable for him. it’s not skinship but just staring into each other’s eyes is something that happens regularly

♡ his love language- words of affirmation- hearing you saying he can do it only makes him more determined and, even though he doesn’t realise it, it actually makes him more independent. you know when he’s having a bad day, or if he’s got something important going on, so you drop him a little text which makes him so happy and he wants to make you proud (which he does and you tell him that all the time)

♡ kisses- kisses are something he craves a lot since the feeling of the first kiss you shared has stayed with him, but is always too afraid to make the first move. afterwards, he’s always a real giggly mess. every kiss is awkward with him at first since you’re both quite inexperienced, but soon you both start to understand what the other likes.

♡ he gets shy around you for ages because he likes you so much

♡ introduces “tech free” dates where neither of you can use your phone. they actually work really well for you two and you get to know each other a lot better

♡ works out what your love language is randomly one day, does his research, then slowly starts to implement it into your relationship

♡ a big hand holder when he senses you need nervous or anxious. he holds your hand for his own comfort as well as yours

♡ you share a lot of your firsts together, as well as being each other’s first relationship. it’s a time for him to learn and change so he appreciates any honesty, even if he does get a little bit sensitive about it sometimes.

#treasure #treasure reactions #treasure imagines #asahi #yedam #doyoung #haruto #jeongwoo #junghwan

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prof-peach · 4 years

Note

the midday lycanroc- how are they doing? can we hear more about them? - ⚜

lil update on their time with us is in order, as they’re adjusting at an understandably slow rate. We right away got him vaccinated and up to date on shots to protect the islands pokemon, and he’s eating well when left alone. He came in a bit skinny, matted, flea ridden, now he’s been treated for the bugs before they spread about, we gave him a wash. It took all three of our core staff, and four pokemon to keep him held enough to scrub out the mud, brush out the fur, get the matted bits out. we had to shave the belly fur down to short hair, he was full of dreads basically, and with every stride he made, the hair pulled and hurt a fair bit. Now he has full movement range and is clean and at least looks like he’s had some care given.

So after getting use to the muzzles and general walk times with me, he’s become almost, dare I say it, eager for them; let me be clear, nasty towards me yes, but the walks hold his attention enough for him to not try to attack me at every given moment, though he does thrash about at the start until were out in the open. He’s got a large pen to roam about in, with outdoor space too to get fresh air and generally run around, but the walks we do with him are crammed full of exposure, responsive training, recalling, basic commands, he can get a lick through the muzzle, so we use peanut butter (Xylitol free obvs) for rewards when he’s not horribly rambunctious, but also to associate the staff and normal behaviours with good high value rewards. it has been very steady but slow progress, he hates being approached, so we let him come to us wherever possible, even if it takes hours.

He’s been quite active in trying to clock me again with his rocky collar, but i’ve grown wise to that after the nasty wound I got last time, SO he’s in turn lessening his attempts at the attack. Theres still a lot of teeth baring, snarling, general displeasure with anyones presence, I paired him up with my Lycanroc (midnight form) to see if he adjusts. They walk together twice a day, and I use my dude as a command leader. So when trying to train some kind of response from the new guy, if I ask for a response, my midnight buddy will give the correct reaction, as an example to the new Lycanroc, and in turn get a lick of peanut butter. We see a reasonably quick turn over with this system, eventually the Midday guy will figure out that if he does the thing, he gets a reward. As of yet he has not done any of this, but we see pokemon catch on around the two week mark when they come to us in this state. My midnight dude is very calm and level headed, so socialising the two has been steady and safe, as the Midday boy-o has had a lot of nervous behaviour around others. I’d normally use Val, and she does stand back and keep watch during all our sessions, but his own kind may help settle him a bit faster.

He has found one joy, which is a lovely development. We put a bunch of things in his area to enrich his time pent with us, as he’s stuck not able to roam the island like most others. We gave him a couple of balls, a few old tires to try to tear into, some tug toys, and one old stufful plush toy. He’s given them all a good go, tore the tires to bits in minutes, but the stuffed toy seems to get carried around with him while he’s in his containment unit, he could easily tear it apart but chooses not to. We’re planning to bring it with us on his walks as a comfort thing, but he wont let us touch it, so we have to get him at least to a point where he doesn't have a muzzle on before we can go about that.

long way to go, but he’ll get there. Not the first difficult pokemon, won’t be the last either.

These updates are nice, its sometimes easy to miss the progress made when you’re wrangling a pokemon all day every day, the little things go unnoticed at times.

#pokemon #prof.peach #peach talks #lycanroc #rescue pokemon

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loveyhoneydovey · 3 years

Text

SFW Alphabet with Joaquín Torres

Note: I've been dying to write something like this so I decided to do it with my baby first. Might do Sam next

All my stories are written with a bisexual reader of colour in mind, but anyone else is more than welcome to read them

Joaquín Torres x GN!Reader

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

He’s a very affectionate partner and especially shows his love through physical affection and acts of service. He wants to feel useful and do his best to make life easier and more enjoyable for you.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

He’d be the type of best friend that’s not physically there often, due to the nature of his job. However, when you do get a chance to spend it feels like he’s never been gone. He completely focuses on you, asks for updates about your life and checks if you need anything. He’s so chill and he’s got the type of personality that has you at ease. You first met him at a mutual friend’s wedding, you both got a bit tipsy and decided to hang out with each other and that was the start of a beautiful friendship

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

YES!!! As I previously mentioned, he loves physical touch and cuddling is one of his favourite ways of showing affection. He loves being the small spoon and he’s not ashamed to say it. He says it’s because you make him feel safe and makes him feel like he has a home to go back to after all the shit he sees

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

He wants to settle down for sure, eventually. Before meeting you, he thought that would come later, but you definitely made him rethink. I don’t think he’s the best cook, but I think he has a few of recipes of food his mom made him when he was younger. Those are the ones he learned to perfect. As for cleaning, because of how strict his life is at the army, I think he allows himself to be a bit messy at home. Definitely messy and not dirty. You both try to split house chores evenly.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

I think he’d be honest and would do it in person. Ending a relationship that played such an important part in his life is definitely heartbreaking, but he thinks he owes it to himself and to you to put an end to it before it gets worse. He’d rather end things on semi good terms than letting it sour and go nowhere.

F = Fiancé(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

He always told himself, when it came to relationships, he’d go with the flow and see how he felt about long-term commitment. He’s a m*ilitary boy, so I think he kinda (unintentionally) follows the stereotype and proposes quickly. Although in his case he does it because he’s truly in love with you and doesn’t want to wait longer than he has to make you his. He’d propose after about a year and a half I’d say.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Have you seen him? He’s the gentlest sweetest baby in every way. I think the fact that he sees so much violence and horror during his deployment pushes him to be more gentle in other aspects of his life. More specifically with you and his family. He wants you to feel like you can come to him for anything whether it’s when you’re feeling down or when you’ve cut your finger on a piece of glass. Either way he’ll treat you with kindness, but not like you’re breakable.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

omg he LOVES hugs. Again, due to the nature of his job, he doesn’t get a lot of physical affection, which drives him crazy. So when he’s home, you can expect him to attack you with hugs all day long. Doesn’t matter if you’re washing the dishes or brushing your teeth. He’ll come up from behind and wrap his arms around your waist, while putting his chin on your shoulder. If you’re facing him, he’s going to engulf you and wrap his arms around you. His hugs are warm and comforting and make you feel safe.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

oh real quick, but actually so do you. I actually headcanon that you two say it at the same time by accident. You both were probably nervous because it was after like two months, but end up laughing it off cause you were so in sync.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

He understands the root of jealousy is mostly insecurity, so he doesn’t get jealous often, because he’s secure in his relationship with you and is actually pretty confident with himself. Of course, it happens occasionally, he’s only human. However, you both always thought that feeling jealous sometimes wasn’t bad, but what could lead to issues was the way one could act on it. So, whenever he feels jealous he takes a moment to collect his thoughts if he needs to, then you’d both talk about it.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

His kisses are often playful and sweet. He doesn’t like to take himself too seriously and neither do you, so you keep things light and playful, but that doesn’t mean it’s not passionate. On the contrary, you feel his love for you with every kiss he leaves on you skin. His favourite place to kiss you is on the nose, because of the way you scrunch it and giggle after he kisses it. As for where he liked to be kissed, soon after you started dating, you found out he loved being shirtless which allowed you to notice he had a beauty mark on the upper part of his right shoulder. From that moment, you developed a habit of kissing it and it made him melt, so it became his favourite place to be kissed.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Oh the BEST. For some reason he attracts them. You told him it was probably because he was a child himself and he flipped you off. You actually think it’s because he’s so cheerful and happy, and he treats them like they’re his friends. You’ve caught him having full on conversations with your friends’ babies who couldn’t even speak yet. And once you had kids, he did the same thing with them.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Whenever possible, you have lazy mornings where you alternate between sleeping, having lazy morning sex and snacking. If it’s a regular morning, he usually has to leave before you, and every time you’d try to distract him and make him stay a bit longer. He’s so used to your “five more minutes, please” that he started waking up five minutes earlier.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

This man has a whole skincare routine before going to sleep. If you also do, then you both complete your routines side by side in front of the bathroom mirror. He might read a bit before bed (and you try to sneakily take a pic of him in his glasses cause you think he looks so cute), or you’d both talk about your day and maybe cuddle a bit before turning off your lamps and getting some sleep.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

He’d open up slowly, there was no pressure between the two of you and he took his time to share the more difficult parts of his life. Now if you open up to him about something defining or traumatic that happened in your life, he might open up faster to let you know you’re not alone, but also to reciprocate the trust you put in him.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

He’s pretty patient most of the time and tries to not let himself get angry over little things, however he’s still human. So depending on the gravity of the situation, he might get angered quickly if he sees something upsetting happening, however, he’s very careful with the way he reacts. He knows something done in anger can lead to regret and guilt, so he thinks before he acts and speaks.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

I think he’d remember an important date like your birthday, he knows around what time your anniversary is, but I feel like he would forget which date it is exactly. He’d remember the most random facts about you, like the kind of stuff where you think he was paying attention, but he was listening subconsciously.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Cliché, but it was during your honeymoon. It was the first time you had referred to him as your husband and it made his heart swell with pride. The love you held for him was so obvious when you looked at him.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He’s protective when he needs to be. He’s not overbearing and trusts that you’re capable of taking care of yourself most of the time. He will step in if he feels like a situation is escalating (let’s say if you’re getting physically or verbally harassed) and he will put himself physically between you and whoever’s trying to harm you.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Omg listen this baby puts so much effort into making your dates enjoyable. He plans out full picnics with cute cakes and charcuterie boards and that doesn’t stop as your relationship progresses. Any gifts he gives you usually have a meaning behind them, and he doesn’t always buy them, sometimes he makes them himself. As I said, he is a bit messy in his daily life, but you two actually have a chart with who’s supposed to do what and that’s how you share your chores, and he does mostly follow it.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

He has a habit of leaving some important stuff until the last minute. It works out in the end, but it causes him an unnecessary amount of stress.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

… have you seen the amount shirtless selfies Danny takes? I think Torres is the exact same. So, he does like to take care of his looks, especially when he sees the effect it has on you. And he has to stay in shape either way, due to his job

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

I think he’d be heartbroken and might feel incomplete for the first few months, but as time goes one, he begins to feel whole again and learns to feel self sufficient.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

He wants to learn another language fluently someday. He wants to help people and he thinks there’s no better way than being able to understand their needs in their native language to be able to help

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

I think he doesn’t like the smell of cigarettes or smoke. He doesn’t mind if his partner’s a smoker, but he probably wouldn’t be around them while they’re smoking.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

This boy sleeps in the weirdest, funniest positions. Like you’d go to sleep in a normal position side by side, or with your back to him, then when you’d wake up you’d find him in a new position every time.

#joaquin torres x reader #joaquin torres imagine #joaquin torres #tfatws imagine #tfatws

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starrynite7114 · 4 years

Text

wrapping (angel reyes)

A/N: Three days till Christmas! How were finals for you all? Christmas shopping all done? I just have two more people on my list and I should be good to go. This year has been tolling, but I’m glad it is almost over. I wanted to let you all know that you’ve made this extremely difficult year so much more bearable. I hope I was able to help some especially with quarantine and all. It’s been tolling on us all but I want to let you all know that we’ve got this and you’re not alone. Please don’t ever hesitate to message me for anything, silly jokes, conversations, etc.

I’m going to post mostly holiday stories till after Christmas. I will update Roommates and the EZ request will be posted! I know I don’t update as quick as I should, but I’m trying! <3

Hope you all enjoy this story!

Shoutout: This is for @blackmissfrizzle! I still owe her one more for her birthday, but we were shooting the shit as we always do, being one another’s second brain and this idea popped up as I was struggling with wrapping Christmas presents. To my second brain, I love you, do not know how we got as close as we did, I am forever thankful. You are evil, but I love nonetheless.

Groupchat for updates! Please join since the tags could be a bit iffy at times!

If you would like to be added to the tag list, please let me know! My tag list is a little messy, but please let me know if you want to be added!

Masterlist

Word count: 2171

Warnings: Fluff, mild sexual situation (hand job, fingering), Does Angel count as a warning?

CREDITS TO THE ORIGINAL GIF MAKER!

“Angel, stop,” you groaned as you felt Angel leave another mark on your skin.

He smirked against your skin, placing a kiss on the spot he just bit. “What?” His voice sounded gravely, you two had just woken up.

“Did you not leave enough bites last night?” Well, this morning, but it counted as last night since you two started last night.

“Can never get enough bites in baby.” He chuckled.

Turning you to face him, Angel kissed you. It started with a few pecks, before he slipped his tongue in, slow and sensual as always. He moved on top of you, your lips never parting, intertwining your hands beside your head.

“Te quiero mucho mi vida,” Angel whispered against your lips before he slipped his tongue inside your mouth again. You felt his hardened member against your leg. Reaching down to wrap your hand around his hardened member, you moved your hand up and down his cock causing Angel to groan. “Fuck baby, just like that. Can’t wait to be buried inside you again.” He ran his fingers up and down your folds, slipping his fingers inside.

You moaned, widening your legs. Angel removed your hand from his cock, moving so he can slide inside you. Just as he was about to, his phone rang, making Angel groan. He buried his face at the crook of your neck as he grabbed his phone.

“What’s up?” He answered. “Yeah, I’ll be there in twenty.” He hung up, placing his phone on the bedside drawer. “You think we can get a quickie done in ten minutes?”

You laughed and pushed away from Angel. “Have you met you? There��s no way baby.” You slipped on your discarded panties and his shirt. “I’ll see you in the kitchen.”

Preparing a quick breakfast for Angel, you made coffee just like how he liked it, with no sweetener or anything. You were cooking some eggs, bacon and a patty for his sandwich.

“Only psycho’s drink their coffee black.” You commented, shaking your head.

“I’m your psychopath though.” Angel grabbed the coffee cup and dropped a kiss on your lips. “Besides, that's how pops drink it.” He took a sip, the bitterness was not something he could get used to, but it woke him up. “What you got planned today?”

“I have to finish up some christmas shopping, but otherwise, I have to wrap presents.”

Angel almost choked on his coffee and tried his best not to laugh. “Baby, we have a deal. You shop, I wrap. It’s better this way.”

“Yes, but we made a deal yesterday remember?” You pouted, wrapping your arms around Angel.

He chuckled and shook his head. “Hard to forget baby, especially when your lips were wrapped around my dick.”

“You’re too much sometimes, you know that?”

“Ain’t no shame baby.”

You laughed. “Of course not, why would you?” You handed him the quick breakfast sandwich you made. “You’ve been busy with the club, I got this.”

Angel doubted that, but he loves you and he supported you no matter what you wanted to do. “If you need me, I’m a call away.”

“Are you going across the border today?”

“No, just templo and a shift at the yard. Then I’m all yours. We still doing a movie marathon?” Angel scruffed down the sandwich you made for him as he waited for your answer.

“Yes, are Coco, Letty and Gilly still coming over?”

“Baby, we’ve had them over the last three nights, we can enjoy one night to ourselves.” Angel drank the rest of his coffee and threw the paper towel that once held his sandwich. “I’ll cook dinner and you pick the movies.”

“Cook? Baby, you can’t cook.”

“Alright, I’ll order take out and I can fuck you on the kitchen table while we wait.”

“Angel!” You threw a piece of bread at him which he caught and ate.

He laughed and kissed you again. “Okay, we can fuck in bed whichever one, regardless, that ass is mine tonight. Te queiro.”

“Love you too.”

Wrapping presents shouldn’t be hard.

But there was no shame of paying professionals to do it either.

This year, you promised yourself that you would wrap the Christmas presents. That for once, you could wrap the presents and learn how to do it.

God bless YouTube University.

You watched videos, practiced with various items so when the time came, you could wrap the presents.

The time came and yet again, it was a fail.

You looked at the Christmas wrappers scattered on your living room floor as you wrapped one of Angel’s several gifts. You and Angel have been dating for three years now and he knew your peril with wrapping gifts. So every Christmas the tasks were always the same. You bought the gifts, Angel wrapped the presents. But with the club being busier this year, you told your boyfriend that you had everything handled. He gave you a look, but you assured him with a smile and a blowjob.

You had your tongue sticking out at the side of your mouth, taping the Christmas wrapper together and yet again, you didn’t measure correctly and it was disproportionate.

“This is hopeless. How is Angel so good at this?” You laid your forehead against the coffee table in front of you. With every failed attempt, the more you regretted not going to the mall and had the professionals wrap your presents. But you had to push through. This Christmas was all you and you didn’t want Angel to lift a finger.

You continued to wrap presents, adding strips of wrapping paper for certain presents that you didn’t measure out correctly. The presents didn’t look bad necessarily, but you just wished they looked better.

You placed all of Angel’s presents under the Christmas tree and went to get the rest of the presents you have yet to wrap. You had at least ten more presents to wrap and it was slightly becoming daunting for you. Presents shouldn’t be hard to wrap and honestly, you were using the mall gift wrappers next year. You went into the kitchen to grab a drink of water and finish the rest of these presents. Looking at your watch, it was fifteen minutes to six. Angel should be home in an hour or so.

Sitting back down with your hot chocolate instead of water, you placed Coco’s present on the coffee table to begin wrapping it. As you were busying yourself with that, Angel came in through the backdoor wanting to surprise you. He left his bike at the clubhouse since Bishop gave him the day off tomorrow. EZ had dropped him off so that he could surprise you. He had the takeout in one hand and your favorite cheesecake from the bakery down the street from the clubhouse.

He placed the food in the kitchen and quietly made his way to the living room where he knew you would be. He heard a train of expletives come out from your mouth and he had to hold back laughter. Peeking into the living room, he saw you with various pieces of christmas wrappers around you, highly concentrated on wrapping a gift on the coffee table. You were trying to fold the top of the present, looking at the gift before you with frustration.

“Cut the top so you can fold it better,” he heard you tell yourself. “Okay, how do I know how much to cut?” You let out a groan. “This is ridiculous. I’m going to the mall tomorrow and have the experts do it.”

“Or you can just let me do it like we always do.”

You yelled, your hot chocolate spilling all over you. “Angel!”

“Baby!” He quickly made his way over to you with paper towels, handing it to you. “I’m so sorry.”

“I know, what the hell, I didn’t even hear your bike.”

“EZ dropped me off, wanted to surprise you.” Angel took off your shirt. “You should change.”

“Yeah? You think?” You rolled your eyes, playfully pushing him.

You took a quick shower and came back out, finding Angel wrapping the rest of the presents. You sat beside him and he had hot chocolate waiting for you. “How are you so good at wrapping presents? You literally wrapped five in twenty minutes.”

Angel shrugged. “My mom and I used to wrap presents for the whole family. It was our thing up till she passed.”

You gave him a small smile and wrapped your hand around his. “So it was tradition?”

“Of some sorts, I would help her with wrapping the presents and she would tell me all these stories about my tio’s and tia’s, about her and my father.” Angel smiled fondly of the memories he shared with his mother. No one could wrap presents with them, it was for him and her, their bonding time. He continued to wrap presents every once in a while, but he didn’t do it traditionally like before, till he met you.

“Maybe we can start our own tradition? You can teach me how to wrap presents and this could be our thing.” You paused. You shouldn’t have said that, the last thing you wanted to do was impose on Angel’s memories of his mother. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.”

“No, it’s okay.” Angel turned to you and kissed your cheek. “I haven’t done this since my mom passed, it's nice to share this tradition with the most important person in my life.”

You felt the tears well up in your eyes, Angel’s words making your heart swell. “I love you.”

“I love you more baby.” He smiled. His smile was so warm. You knew he was a tough guy, but when he was with you, he didn’t need to have to hide behind that exterior. “Do me a favor, can you grab the gift I got for pops? It’s in the drawer on my side of the bed.”

“Sure.”

You did as he asked and brought the gift over to him. It was in a velvet box and you couldn’t help but think what it could possibly be? Felipe hardly wore jewelry, but made Angel got home some to commemorate Marisol.

“Here babe.” You offered the box to him.

Angel took it and thanked you. The nerves began to set in for him, but he had to do it, he had this.

Taking a deep breath, he turned to face you and you were standing, watching the baking show you had on before he came. He wasn’t sure when it clicked for him exactly, but a year ago, during the holiday season, he came to your apartment and found you watching some cheesy Hallmark Christmas movies and Letty was with you. You had looked up at him and smiled, patting the seat beside you. He realized then that he wanted to have this every holiday, every day for the rest of his life.

He wanted to come home to a home you two shared with your kids surrounding you.

He wanted to come home to you during a hard day and just be enveloped in your warmth.

He wanted to make new traditions with you and do it every year just as he did with his family.

You were his family now.

“Y/N,” he softly called out your name.

“Yeah baby?” You turned to face Angel and found him on one knee with the velvet box opened, showing you a beautiful diamond ring.

“When we first met, I never thought we would get this far. If anything, I thought you would come to your senses and not give me a second or third date, but you have no idea how happy I was you did. I hardly ever win, but in hindsight it doesn’t matter since my biggest victory is you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you and make new traditions with you.” You began to cry along with Angel as he took your hand. “Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife? I love you, and there’s no one else I rather watch cheesy Hallmark movies with than you.”

You managed to laugh between your tears and nodded your head. “Yes, I will marry you.”

Angel smiled brightly as he took the ring off and slipped it in your finger. He stood up and kissed you, wrapping his arms around you.

Pulling away, you looked at your ring and kissed him again. Life was hardly perfect with Angel, but you didn’t want that. You want all the imperfections you two had because at the end of the day, much like your divided task with Christmas, you two completed one another. Where one lacked, the other picked up.

And that’s what it was all about. You bettered one another.

Angel was your better half.

No questions about it.

“We really gotta teach you how to wrap mami, cause I can’t wrap every damn present.”

You laughed. “We better get started then.”

=================

tagged list: @justahopelessssromantic : @carlaangel86 : @woahitslucyylu : @encounterthepast : @enamoured-x : @anangelwhodidntfall : @briana-mishell24 : @bribri-82 : @chibsytelford : @agirllovespancakes : @twistnet : @everyhowlmarksthedead : @trulysuccubus : @jadert15 : @sammskellington : @cind-in-real-life : @onmyspookysblock : @sadeyesgf : @thickemadame : @summertimesadnesswithadashofsass : @gemini0410 : @elcococruz : @samcrobae : @sesamepancakes : @iambabyharry : @blackmissfrizzle : @mrs-losa : @1-800-imagines : @phoenixhalliwell : @lady-pswrld : @dazzledamazon : @getyourcrayoncas : @fvckthisbxtchup : @lukealvxz : @scuzmunkie : @lilac-tea-time : @danie1432 : @cocotheclown : @soaronmywings : @my-rosegold-soul : @buttercup812 : @un-poetryy : @angelreyesgirl : @sheeshgivemeabreak : @vicmackeybullshxt : @bigcreatorwombatdreamer : @khyharah : @strawberrywritings : @cherry-icetea : @fuzzy-jellyfish : @losolvidad0s : @brownsugarcoffy : @courtrae89 : @prdsdjarin : @blessedboo : @marvelmaree : @enamouravecleslivresetlechocolat : @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead : @thesandbeneathmytoes : @dark-twisted-and-mechanical-mind : @maddie-georges : @pearlkitten33 : @incorrect-mcdanno : @that-chick212 : @imanerdychubbyqueen : @60shannon : @deeandbobbymcgee : @marquelapage : @justlikebreathing : @mindless-x-dreaming : @thesewordsareallihavetogive : @wiccanmetallicrose : @appropriate-writers-name : @likedovesinthewnd : @admirehermind : @krysiewithak : @helli4nthus : @robbosvgdens : @scuzmunkie : @proudlittlewitchbitch

#angel reyes #angel reyes fanfic #angel reyes fic #angelreyes #angel reyes x reader #mayans imagine #mayans mc imagine #mayans mc fanfiction #mayans mc fanfic

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penaltbox · 4 years

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the hills - jack hughes

warnings: mentions of cheating, drug use in sports, and using unhealthy coping mechanisms. this really isn’t any representation of how i think he is, he’s just the guy i picked for this idea.

based on the hills by the weeknd. if you like it send some feedback or reblog :)))

word count: 4.4k

You can’t help but laugh at the stupid joke your friend just made at your expense about Eric always being gone for work. You’re ready to send a smart remark her way but your phone lights up and the notification has you freezing.

Jack.

Your breath catches in your throat at the sight of it. His name is purposefully kept simple in your phone to try and pass him off as unimportant, like a forgotten group project member from a class you were well over with, but he was so much more than that.

Lexie clears her throat quietly and nods down at the phone. She was all too aware of who Jack was and what him texting you meant. Luckily your other friends had no clue and they hadn’t caught on to why you’d gone quiet suddenly. You bite your lip and look back at them, trying to put yourself back into the conversation, but you had lost them while you were in your own little world.

Your phone buzzes again and you sigh, picking it up. You knew if he was sending multiple texts that it was only a matter of time before he’d show up at your place and you didn’t really want to explain to your friends why this boy was suddenly on your doorstep.

‘Busy tonight?’

‘I can be over in 20’

You glance up at Lexie and find her already watching you so you turn the phone towards her and she nods. Jack usually didn’t take no for an answer and you were sure tonight was no different.

“Ladies, why don’t we grab an Uber and head to that new restaurant that just opened? I heard they have some awesome mixed drinks,” Lexie bluffs, buying you a way out so he could come over.

They all agree quickly, but you decline, saying you’re not feeling too well all of a sudden. Your friends laugh, making up reasons why you want out of what was supposed to be a long awaited girls’ night. None of them are right though and it’s only because Lexie won’t weigh in with the truth, thank God.

You entertain everyone a little longer, walking them to the door when the car pulls up outside. They all file in, but Lexie hangs back for a second. She gives you a hug goodbye but holds you for an extra second.

“You better figure out who you want more because you know Eric will end up finding out about him eventually,” she mumbles, “and I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

You sigh because you know she’s right. Jack was only supposed to ever be a one night stand, but he’d turned into a 5 month ordeal at this point. You give her a tight smile as she joins the rest of the girls and you wave them off.

Heading back inside, you put all the glasses near the kitchen sink, making a mental note about emptying the dishwasher later. You pick your phone up to check and see where Jack was but a knock on your door answers it for you. With a deep breath you head over, never quite ready for all the feelings that came with seeing him. He had some sort of hold on you that you could never explain but you couldn’t get enough of it.

You swing the door open, exchanging your nerves for a smirk as you see the slightly younger boy on the doorstep, “hey you. Come in.”

Jack does exactly that, his arm coming around your waist as he leans down to kiss you hard. You can’t help but grab onto him, arms finding their way around his shoulders as he picks you up suddenly. You hear him slam the door behind you two as he carries you to the kitchen, setting you down on the island but staying between your legs.

“Hi,” he finally says once he lets you pull back a bit. He’s got a smile on his face that makes your heart stutter. He was always a little cocky and a whole lot clingy when he was with you but you loved the combination.

You fake pout, playing with the hair at the nape of his neck, “you interrupted girls’ night, Jack.”

“Aww, I did?” He asks, one hand already slipping under your shirt but only to rest on your hip, “does that mean you and I can’t have a drink first?”

“House is mine all weekend,” you answer his unasked question, nodding towards the liquor cupboard behind him.

His eyes light up a little at your admission and he slowly untangles himself from you, though you know it won’t last long. If you had to guess, you figured Jack’s love language was physical touch with the way he hardly ever let you go when you two were together.

He starts to rifle through the shelves, pulling your usual bottle of wine down for you and you force yourself not to think about how he was starting to become comfortable and familiar with your world. He grabs a bottle of something stronger for himself and you know you’ll have to refill whatever he takes.

With a glass poured for both of you, Jack turns around and hands you yours. He raises his glass up for a toast and you laugh lightly.

“What’s the toast for, Hughes? You sign a big contract or something that I don’t know about?” You tease, but raise yours as well.

“No,” he says, blushing a little at your tone, “just a toast. To us, I guess.”

Us. It’s a phrase that shouldn’t exist. There should be no ‘you and Jack’ at all but there definitely is and you didn’t think you were strong enough to shut that down any time soon. Truth be told, you didn’t want to. You’d rather date Jack but he’d made it clear he wasn’t in the right place for commitment yet in life.

You ignore the issues, like you usually did, and clink your glass with his, “to us then. And all the fun that comes with it.”

Jack takes a drink of his own mixture and you’re almost shocked at the amount he takes down. You reach out and put a hand on his arm.

“Whoa there. We’re in no rush here tonight,” you remind him, “are you okay?”

“Of course I am. I’m here with you.”

The statement has you blushing now and you set your glass down so you can pull him closer. You liked the way you were basically the same height when you sat on the island. It made things a lot easier and gave you the chance to make a move rather than leaving the control up to him.

“You are here. How’s hockey been?” You ask, like you hadn’t watched every game this season so far.

Jack shrugs, stepping in close again as he finishes his drink and sets the glass over with yours, “it’s okay. I’m more interested in you right now though. Maybe tonight we can update that amazing Polaroid I keep in my wallet.”

Your face feels hot when you remember the picture he’d taken of you one night and tucked away for himself. You knew where it was in his wallet and you knew the wear marks had gotten bad over his last few road trips.

Yeah, you two were the definition of fucked up, if you had to weigh in on it.

“I bet you’d like that, huh?” You ask, grabbing his shirt and tugging him the rest of the way towards you.

It’s easy to kiss Jack, to let yourself get lost in him. You weren’t sure when you realized it, but kissing him was easy and fun. You found yourself wanting to do it all the time, so when you did have him all to yourself you let it happen as much as possible. He knew exactly how to kiss you, exactly when to slide his tongue into your mouth, and where to trail the kisses when he wanted to make you shiver under his touch.

He seems to be moving faster than usual, his kisses shortening as he moves his lips across your jaw and down your neck. You tug on his hair a little, trying to get him to look at you, but he seems to ignore it. You press a hand to his chest and try to push him back.

“Jack,” you say firmly, finally getting him to settle down and look at you, “what’s your hurry today? Can’t we just enjoy this?”

He rolls his eyes but pulls you closer to the edge of the counter, “why slow down? You haven’t seen me in a week. Aren’t you ready to go?”

You sigh, looking over his features, and see how exhausted he looks. It’s always just a hookup to him and you have to remind yourself of that. Just because you started catching feelings didn’t mean that he did. You ignore it though, and nod at his last question.

“Can we go upstairs then?” He asks, hands slipping under your shirt as he lets his fingers dance lightly up your sides.

You shiver a little and his smirk grows, but you mumble, “hmm, I guess we could.”

It’s all he needs to hear before he’s tugging you off the counter and nudging you towards the stairs. You reach back without looking and his hand grips yours almost instantly. You didn’t even have to look to know he was close and sometimes it scared you how easily you could find each other.

You push open the door to the guest bedroom, never daring to take your activities into your actual bedroom, and you turn around to find Jack watching you intently. You want the upper hand this time though, so you nod your head at the bed.

“Your turn for some attention. Come here,” you say, trying to sound as nice as you could, but you know it sounds coy.

Jack obliges you happily though and crowds your personal space, his back towards the bed. You reach up to push him back, hands finding his sides and pressing into him. The quick wince from him as he grabs your right hand scares you and you back up suddenly.

“Jack? What’s wrong?” You ask, your eyes looking him up and down as you try to figure out what just happened. You realize suddenly that it’s what's under his shirt that made him react so quickly.

You reach for the hem of his shirt and tug it up above his stomach, finding a bruise blooming above his left hip. It’s all different colors and you know he got it from a game. You reach out, just barely grazing your fingers against his skin.

“Don’t,” he says through gritted teeth as he grabs your hand, “it’s fine.”

“Fine? That doesn’t look fine at all,” you scoff.

“I handled it,” he says and you instantly know what he means.

He’d gotten them before and at first you had no clue what they were. Toradol shots were still given out like candy in the league and Jack had gotten them before he even realized what they were. He started getting them pretty often and last he’d told you, he was going to try to get an alternative means of pain relief.

“I thought you were done with those. How long ago did you get this one?” You ask, still not taking your eyes off the bruise.

“Three hours ago,” he whispers and your gaze immediately shoots up to his face.

“Three hours?” You ask, fighting to keep your voice lower, “you used to last six hours on those. Are you taking them that often?”

“Don’t fucking worry about me!” He snarls, pushing his shirt back down, “You don’t get to judge me either. Do you forget whose house we’re in? I’m not the one cheating on someone here.”

You swallow hard and look away from him. There was no denying that comment stung a lot and your fight or flight had turned to the latter. You know Jack had a tendency to get mean when he got backed into a corner about something he didn’t want to talk about but you always seemed to push it just a bit too far with him. You were left to regret it instantly when he bit back.

“Can we just do what we normally do? I don’t want to fight with you,” you ask, much quieter now than a few moments ago.

He sighs and nods, reaching for your hand before he leans in to kiss you. You let him do what he always really came for and offer yourself up in the only way you knew how to be there for him. He wasn’t good at letting you in normally, but sleeping with him was different. He was all about actions rather than words.

He always took his time when it came to sex. He’d undress you first, giving you attention until you’re begging, and then the egotistical part of him would ensure that you always got off. It was bragging rights for him basically but those ones at least benefited you as well.

What never failed to surprise you was that he always let you hold him after. It’s like he needed it, but couldn’t verbalize it, so when he rolls onto his side and pulls you close you let your lips find his forehead as he presses his face into the crook of your neck. You know that’s when you get the real Jack. The one he’s too afraid to show you during the daylight. You’re not sure if it’s the painkillers finally kicking in or the alcohol hitting him just right after he’d gotten off, but he’s so much more affectionate and human in those moments.

“I swear I’m gonna talk to doc about getting pain treatment a different way,” he mumbles, his arm that’s wrapped around you tightening a little as he says it.

You lean back to look at him and push his hair out of his eyes, “that sounds like a good idea. I’m sure he’ll be able to help you out.”

A smile flashes across his face but it’s gone just as quickly as it showed. He sits up then and glances back at you, a look on his face that you can’t quite figure out.

“I need to go,” he says, swinging his legs off the bed and starting to pull his clothes back on.

You sit up, holding the blanket tight around you as you watch him. You wished you could say something or ask him to stay even, but you knew better. As much as you hated seeing him leave, there was really no other option. You have to take a deep breath to make sure your feelings don’t come flying out of your mouth before it’s too late to stop them.

Jack pulls his shirt back on and turns back towards you, kneeling on the bed to lean over and give you a few quick kisses before heading for the bedroom door.

He grabs the handle and hesitates, looking over his shoulder with the same look you couldn’t make out when he’d sat up in bed. He almost looks upset, but his shoulders aren’t tensed up like they are when he’s upset after a game. You feel your stomach turn but you have to ask.

“Is everything okay, Jack?”

He pushes a smile onto his face and nods, “yeah, it’s all good. I’ll see you around.”

You return the smile and watch him finally go, falling back into the empty bed that you were always left with. Things always felt a little more empty once Jack was gone.

—

“This place is packed,” you raise your voice, leaning in so Lexie can hear you better.

She nods, looking just as displeased as you, “I know, but Sam wanted to come here for her birthday so we just have to fake some fun for a couple hours and then maybe we can get everyone to go somewhere else.”

Clubs weren’t typically your thing but Lexie swore she’d stick by your side that night since the both of you would much rather be at home with wine and a blanket. Instead you were trying to make your way to a bar that had layers of people at least three deep trying to get their drinks.

Lexie bites the bullet and goes up first to get you both drinks and you look around the room, trying to get your bearings for where things were. You find a back exit, the bathrooms, and what looks to be a VIP section. It’s not a normal VIP section though because there’s no one preventing people from going in or out of the area so you shrug it off and wait for your friend to return.

“To being newly single and Sam’s birthday for getting you out of your apartment!” Lexie smiles, handing you your drink and holding hers up.

You laugh and happily clink your glass, taking an even bigger drink than you’d intended when you suddenly remember the last person you’d done a toast with.

You hadn’t heard from Jack since he left after giving you that odd look. Maybe he wasn’t handling the pressure of the season well and just needed to be in his own head space. That was the excuse you kept telling yourself anyways. You’d broken things off with Eric once he’d gotten home from his work conference because you knew you didn’t have feelings for him the way you did for Jack. Not that you had any right to, but since when did anyone’s heart ever listen to logic?

“Should we try and find a table?” Lexie asks, having to really raise her voice to be heard now.

You nod, knowing it was almost impossible to speak up and have her hear you so instead you head a little farther into the club, trying to move towards the wall. You get a bit of a clearing then and you both let out a sigh.

“I thought we were about to die in there,” you laugh, the noise level lower in the back part of the room.

Lexie snorts and opens her mouth to respond, but the way her eyes go wide over something she sees behind you makes you nervous. You turn to check what she’d seen and it’s almost instant that you find what caught her attention. Jack is standing there, back near the VIP area, with a pretty little thing pressed against the front of him. She’s trying so hard to get his attention but you know from the look on his face that he’s not hearing a word she says.

Your heart sinks a little at the sight of him. He was obviously available to other people, but he hadn’t been able to make any time for you. You scold yourself immediately and turn back to Lexie.

“He hasn’t reached out. I should just leave him,” you say, but there’s an itch suddenly under your skin from knowing how close he is.

Lexie raises an eyebrow at you and glances back at Jack, “you’re kidding, right? I bet if you went over there right now he’d send that girl packing and talk to you.”

She’s not wrong but those weren’t the words you wanted her to say to you. What you needed to hear was that you should leave him alone because he hadn’t tried to see you. You chew on your lip as you think over what Lexie had just said and glance at him again.

He meets your gaze this time but it’s like he’s seeing right through you. The look alone is enough to have you turning around and heading in his direction. He sidesteps the girl who was trying to talk to him and meets you halfway. His hair is starting to get long and he definitely hasn’t shaved in a couple days, but you can’t tell that until he’s closer.

“You look hot,” he smiles, leaning down a bit so you can hear him better. He looks rough and you can smell the alcohol rolling off of him as he presses so close to you it’s hard to think straight. The glass in his hand is empty save for one last drink of the dark liquid. This isn’t the Jack you were used to. This was someone else entirely.

“Thanks,” you say, not used to him using that phrase to describe you, “who did you come here with?”

He frowns and looks around the room, “uh, I don’t know. I think Nico maybe?”

Your worry only grows when he can’t give you a straight answer, “are you sure you’re okay here? Do you need to leave maybe?”

“Stop,” he groans, running a hand through his hair, “why do you care so much? I treat you like shit but you still come back. Why?”

“I don’t know. I can’t help it, I guess,” you shrug, suddenly feeling a little uncomfortable.

Jack’s eyes are a little glassy and he seems to be focusing hard to keep his sight on you. He wobbles a little and you reach out, putting a gentle grip on his arm.

“No, don’t. I’m not what you want. Fuck, you deserve a real guy. Listen, I’m not the shiny new toy in the league anymore. Now I’m just some kid who can’t put up the right numbers,” he says, choking out a laugh that sounds hollow.

“Why don’t you let anyone help you? This doesn’t have to be something you do alone.”

His eyes roll back in his head as he closes them, sighing, “you don’t listen. You can’t fix me. What about that don’t you get?”

“Jesus, Jack, if you’d let people in then this wouldn’t be a fight right now. Where have you been lately even? You went missing after the last time you came over,” you try and change the subject, hoping whatever is coursing through his system allows you to redirect him easily.

“I got things taken care of. No more painkiller shots,” he smirks, like he’s really proud of whatever it is he’d done.

Something about the way he's still looking through you rather than at you has you doubting the source of his new fix. You refuse to ask, not wanting to know if he’d found something harder or what. You knew what type of things athletes could get involved with.

He reaches his hand up suddenly, cupping your cheek, and finally looking at you like he sees you, “you care about me so much,” he starts, his thumb gently rubbing your cheek, “and I care so fucking much, but I can’t be the guy for you. I wish I could because I’ve never had feelings for someone the way I do for you, but I’m too fucked up. I can’t take you down with me.”

You swallow hard as his words sink in and you’re sure people must be watching the two of you. You’re still pressed close and he can’t look away from you now. He knows his feelings for you border on being in love, but he meant what he said, even if his head was so fuzzy he could hardly remember where he was. He was always sure about you and his feelings for you though.

“Jack, I broke up with him,” you mumble, but somehow he still manages to hear you. Of course he heard you.

His face flashes with confusion and even a little bit of hurt, and it’s the most emotion you’ve seen from him so far. He swallows and opens his mouth before closing it again. He blinks hard and then seems to settle back into the blank stare he’d been sporting.

“You didn’t have to do that. He cared about you,” he finally replies, but he seems a little thrown off still. You can’t see it in his look, but you can certainly hear it in the slight waiver of his voice.

You nod, because of course you knew, but you tell him, “but he wasn’t you, J. He never could be.”

He can’t bring himself to respond but his bottom lip quivers a little. He has to force himself to zone out so he doesn’t break down and try to keep you all to himself. That wouldn’t be fair if he did. He knew he had to let you go even though he only wanted the opposite. You can tell he’s closing himself off and you realize he’s not coming back to you again.

“You know if you ever need me you just have to call. I’ll always show up for you,” you nod, forcing yourself to keep your cool. If you lost it you weren’t sure how he’d react because he certainly wasn’t in his right mind.

The lights in the club dance across his face, creating shadows on the left side of his features. You know it’s a little ironic but you look between the differences and see the two sides of him then. He wanted to be good. A good guy, a good hockey player, and a good boyfriend even. But the other side of him had taken too much already. Too many hits, too many drinks, and too many one night stands to feel like he could settle down with a good person.

“I’m gonna go, Jack. Don’t be a stranger. Please,” you tell him, silently begging him to ask you to stay.

Instead his hand drops from your cheek and he nods, leaning forward to kiss your forehead. You close your eyes and take it in for a second before he’s pulling away. You start to walk away to where Lexie is waiting and watching the entire thing. She gives you a comforting smile and holds her arm out for you to hide under.

She heads for the exit immediately, knowing you were done for. You can’t help but glance back at where Jack still was. He’s still watching you walk away, eyes locked on you but glossed over in a way that tells you he isn’t taking anything in again. The lights still reflect on his face, light and dark, and you know you have to let him go.

It’s just that everything felt a little more empty when Jack was gone, for you and for him.

#jack hughes #mine #my writing #new jersey devils #nj devils #nhl imagine #nhl fic #hockey fic #hockey imagine #usa hockey #tw: drug use

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