#(in adopt me for clarification)

[amaranthdahlia]

4 kids is crazy

[gearbox-doll]

Today my mama held me for the first time since she passed three years ago. It wasn't really her. But. I got to pretend for a moment that it was.

I miss my mama.

[ocdhuacheng]

I have… lots of thoughts on milsiril and kabru and the commentary on mixed-race family/adoption, in particular white parents with children of color. I think it’s really cool kui incorporated this into the story because lots of (particularly white) people just think adoption is this pure altruistic thing and don’t think about the negative affects it has on kids (again, kids of color) to not have people of their own culture to grow up with.

[fandomsoda]

(Omg the quality is trash and the english is wrong-)

"Oh, what did you bring mama?"

The first kind moss I'm learning about!!!

Thank you very much this is lovely

[blackeyed-daisy]

y'know what I'm gonna be pissy for a second because I'm too frustrated by this to be able to sleep tonight so sorry for me thinking my opinions are worth publishing in their own post but I really cannot fucking stand some of the conversations I've seen about what's apparently objectively "correct" communication

like especially I've seen/taken part in several conversations about how saying "I feel like you did xyz thing" or "I feel like xyz thing happened" is somehow accusatory or otherwise wrong with one post even saying "well you wouldn't say 'i feel like happy' so 'i feel like you did xyz' can't be a feeling you're expressing ☝️🤓"

and it's like even ignoring how that can absolutely be a grammatically valid sentence if you didn't deliberately go out of your way to write it poorly to prove your argument that's also not even the fucking point of the conversation that the other person is trying to have with you???

it literally doesn't fucking matter if someone is actually expressing their feelings or if they're akshually expressing their thoughts instead or even god forbid a secret third thing. because the entire fucking point of someone saying "I feel like you did xyz" or "I feel like it happened" is exclusively to talk about their subjective fucking perspective and that's it. its not accusatory by any means unless I guess you yourself believe your thoughts and feelings are objective fact and therefore you project that assumption onto everyone else around you?? even though they're not???

like I can assure you from personal experience if I was ACTUALLY accusing someone of doing something I would simply say "you did this thing." I would not deliberately go out of my way to emphasize that it is my subjective personal perspective by emphasizing very explicitly that I only feel like a certain thing happened or whatever if I was genuinely accusing people of doing something. because not everyone on earth thinks that their thoughts and feelings are objective reality, and just because you do does not mean you get to make that everyone elses problem!!! be fucking serious!!!! and when I'm putting effort into explicitly NOT accusing you of anything and yet you insist I am anyways because??? reasons??? because the words people actually say to you don't fucking matter and you'd rather make shit up than actually listen to what they're trying to fucking tell you???

like if you genuinely feel like someone saying "I feel like you did xyz thing" is accusatory then that's fine because everyone has their own communication styles but you do NOT get to act like your communication style of... I guess not talking about your fucking problems with people at all ever and expecting them to read your mind?? is somehow conveniently the only correct communication style and everyone else is committing wrongspeak for explicitly stating what their PERSONAL, SUBJECTIVE POINT OF VIEW IS.

like at the end of the day I can tell you from personal fucking experience that your loved ones are not saying "I feel like you did xyz" to subtly accuse you of anything. they're saying that to you because they fucking love you and are trying to fix problems in your relationship so they can keep loving you. and for you to just sit here and play internet psychology chess and declare that uh oh!!! my Language Pedantry senses are tingling and you're a bad communicator now!!! is fucking ridiculous. because thats not the point of the conversation at hand and you know that it's not. the point of the conversation is that this person has a problem and they're making an earnest attempt to communicate their side of the issue to make things right. and for you to ignore that and focus on how they're expressing their feelings or whatever instead of what they're trying to express in the first place is???

do you even fucking care about the other person??? when you care more about whether it's akshually not a feeling you're expressing 🤓 akshually if you have any thoughts or feelings whatsoever that means you think they're true and you're accusing me 🤓 because I've decided you're accusing me so you are 🤓 instead of the fact that someone you care about is fucking hurt and is trying to communicate that with you???

you can feel like your loved ones are accusing you with that communication style all you want, but you don't get to declare your feelings a reality to the point where you insist that the only reason anyone would ever talk like that is ONLY because they're accusing you and NOTHING MORE. though I guess maybe your insistence that that must be accusatory language exclusively because you feel like it's accusatory to the point that you feel justified in insisitng that MUST be the other person's motive would certainly indicate why you get so antsy when other people try to express their feelings around you lol

[un-fwuit-un-fwog]

Twisted Wonderland Masterlist

Heartslabyul:

Riddle Rosehearts:

Ruffled Hair and Genuine Smiles

Trey Clover:

Coming Soon

Cater Diamond:

My Head in Your Hands (+art)

Ace Trappola:

The Prefect Was Here

Cards and Casts (The Rain: Part 5)

Deuce Spade:

The Prefect Was Here

Cards and Casts (The Rain: Part 5)

Savanavlaw:

Leona Kingscholar:

Fine. One more night.

Hold your ear to my heart. Hear it Beat. (The Rain: Part 3)

Request! Leona x Fem Reader Who's Wary of Men

Request! Leona x Reader With Selective Mutism

First Choice

Ruggie Bucchi:

Coming Soon

Jack Howl:

Your Warmth (The Rain: Part 6)

Octavinelle:

Azul Ashengrotto:

Coming Soon

Jade Leech:

Coming Soon

Floyd Leech:

Coming Soon

Scarabia:

Kalim al Asim:

The Prefect Was Here

My Head in Your Hands (+art)

Sometimes, crying is the strong thing. (The Rain: Part 8)

Request! Kalim x Reader Who Saves Him

Jamil Viper:

The Prefect Was Here

Sometimes, crying is the strong thing. (The Rain: Part 8)

Pomefiore:

Vil Shoenheit:

The Prefect Was Here

Rook Hunt:

The Prefect Was Here

I Envy Him

Epel Felmier:

The Prefect Was Here

Your Warmth (The Rain: Part 6)

Ignihyde:

Idia Shroud:

I'm still here. Thank you for giving me that chance. (The Rain: Part 7)

Ortho Shroud (platonic only):

I'm still here. Thank you for giving me that chance. (The Rain: Part 7)

Diasomnia:

Malleus Draconia:

Rain, But No Thunder (The Rain: Part 4)

Lilia Vanrouge:

Request! Lilia's Adopted Daughter (platonic)

Request! Lilia's Biological Daughter (platonic)

My Head in Your Hands (+art)

Moon kissed lilies just aren't the same without morning dew.

Goodnight and sleep tight. (The Rain: Part 9)

Silver (Vanrouge):

Goodnight and sleep tight. (The Rain: Part 9)

Sebek Zigvolt:

Your Warmth (The Rain: Part 6)

Staff:

Dire Crowley:

Coming Soon

Divus Crewel:

The Rain is Especially Loud Tonight (The Rain: Part 1) (platonic)

Falling Behind (platonic)

Mozus Trein (platonic only):

The Chair Next to Your Bed (The Rain: Part 2)

Ashton Vargas:

The Chair Next to Your Bed (The Rain: Part 2) (platonic)

Sam:

The Chair Next to Your Bed (The Rain: Part 2) (platonic)

RSA:

Aruchemi Aruchemievichi Pinka (Che'nya):

Coming Soon

Neige LeBlanche:

Coming Soon

Other:

Rollo Flamme:

Coming Soon

Grim (platonic only):

Little Pal With Paws

Ernesto Foulworth:

Coming Soon

A character you like not on the list? Send in a request!

Miscellaneous Fics:

If a Fae Were a Vampire (drabble) (W/Art)

Multi-Part Fics:

The Rain is Especially Loud Tonight (The Rain: Part 1)

The Chair Next to Your Bed (The Rain: Part 2)

Hold your ear to my heart. Hear it Beat. (The Rain: Part 3)

Rain, But No Thunder (The Rain: Part 4)

Cards and Casts (The Rain: Part 5)

Your Warmth (The Rain: Part 6)

I'm still here. Thank you for giving me that chance. (The Rain: Part 7)

Sometimes, crying is the strong thing. (The Rain: Part 8)

Goodnight and sleep tight. (The Rain: Part 9)

Asks About Pre-existing Fics:

Leona's Interraction W/The Prefect Explanation (The Rain)

When will Grim's part be? + Clarification on the Collapse and Rescue (The Rain)

Blog Navigation Page

Request Information

[long-live-astronerd-ghost-king]

DPXDC prompt. Family? Assemble!

Reporter: Gotham News, and we have a new supervillain on the line. Mr Phantom, what are your demands at the moment? Phantom with lack of sleep and with tears: I..I want a titanium model of a spaceship! And to get a good night’s sleep and to go to the local school…and some fudge and.. Reporter: Oh, my bad. Just one question for clarification, are you by any chance an orphan or are your parents villains? Phantom: I prefer the term mad scientists Reporter: Okay. So, Gotham news! And with me on the line is the new potential child of Wayne or Batman. Want to know how two serial adopters will share a child leading a double life? Stay with us and find out. Now let's check in with Jessie for our weather report. Phantom: Wait, what?

~~~~~

Danny spends the night running from the Red Hood with a bag of fudge, Red Robin with a pot of coffee, Batman with the adoption papers and, for some reason, Brucie Wayne with an idea of internship at a space station. Ha! The Justice League will never let a ghost into orbit. Not that Wayne can blackmail superheroes or smth. Danny: Fuck you all! I’m done with vigilante activity, I’m not your competitor! What do you want from me? And I’m done with crazy billionaires too. I swear, I’d rather be adopted by a local mob boss just to piss you off! ~Later~ Danny *sees peering out of the corner Matches Malone*: Are you kidding me?! Robbie *jumps off the roof and lands right behind Danny*: Stop running, lil brother, No one’s left the family yet. Minnie: What about Neal? Robbie *shakes a knife with a bow on the handle negatively*: He’s on sabbatical, that doesn’t count. Anyway, it’s a gift for you, cub. Danny: Um, thank you, but my lab scalpels are definitely sterile, and your blade was in who knows who before you brought it here. Robbie: It’s brand-new! And Archie decorated it with a ghost on the handle. Look! It's cute! With a smile and… Dick: Hands up! You’re under arrest for trying to steal our new member! Minnie: Why is he yours, damn cop? Selina: Boys, don’t fight. He’s mine. Schrodinger’s cat is still a kitten. Killer Croc: No way, my niece is staying with me. Danny: Uncle Waylon? Long time no see. Ra's: My grandson needs steady access to ectoplasm. Danyal, come with me. Danny: Over my dead body! Oh shiii…I mean no. Anyway, don’t you think the alley’s getting a little crowded?

~~~~

Killer Croc: Is he still mad at me? RR: Danny doesn’t talk to uncles who tried to eat his beloved brother Red Robin. Killer Croc: He wasn’t even your brother then. What do you want? An apology from me? RR: That would be nice.

~~~~

Danny: I didn’t think the GIW agents would really fear the reputation of Gotham and not follow me. What a relief! Jason *quickly throws the knife into the sink*: Wow, you got lucky. Alfred: Master Jones, why don’t you eat your steak? I thought last week you were complaining to Batman that 'cause of him you got not many prey. Croc *pulls a piece of white robe from the teeth*: Well, now there is a lot of it. Bruce *gives Jason and Croc the side-eye*.

~~~~

Ra's: You do realize that Malone, Wayne and Batman are the same person, right? Boy, you were born into a family of geniuses, don’t disappoint Grandpa. Danny: Triple pocket money, triple gifts for the holidays, the opportunity to complain about the same family member three times. No, Grandpa, I definitely don’t understand. Ra's: Smart little weasel.

~~~~

Selina: Okay. Purely theoretical. Do you like to steal? Danny: I wouldn’t say that. But somehow I stole the sword from the fright knight. And also stole few jewels but then I was under the mind control. I returned them. Well, the crown and ring of the king of the ghost zone I also took without permission. Oh, and the answers to the test once. And I’m really sorry about the last one. Neal: I feel the story behind it but I prefer to know nothing about it.

[utdr-fractured]

G R E E T I N G S : )

This is the blog for the UTDR Fractured AU.

Keep Reading For More Info

In this pinned post you with find the links to the released pages, FAQ's, and rules for asks. This post will be updated regularly to keep things organized.

SUMMARY

During one of their visits to the Dark World, Kris and Susie find that two humans had mysteriously appeared from seemingly nowhere. Unsure of what else to do, Kris beings them back to Hometown to figure out who they are, where they came from, and more importantly, why they were covered in dust. With nowhere else to go, the two are essentially adopted into the Dreemurr family until they can figure out how to get back home.

MASTERPOST

Prologue

Page 1 - 2

Page 3

Page 4

Page 5

Page 6

Page 7

Page 8

Page 9

Page 10

RELATED TAGS

Looking for something specific within this blog? Here's a list of tags that could help you narrow things down.

#Consequences: Posts that have/will directly impact the comic in one way or another

#Influences: Posts that have/will influence one or more of the characters in the comic. This could be influencing a character's actions or their psyche.

#Mod Answers: Answers that I personally answer

#KFC Answers: Answers that any of the KFC gang answers (These are illustrated answers)

#Utdr Fractured: Uploaded pages for the Fractured comic.

ABOUT THE MOD (COMING SOON)

Figured for anyone who is interested to know more about the person creating the comic, I'll give a little bit of info!

FAQ'S AND CLARIFICATIONS

When does the comic upload?

Ideally, every Friday …. But you know… Life can get in the way sometimes!

When does Fractured take place?

The beginning of this comic begins after the events of Deltarune chapter 2, and eventually branches off into its own route during Chapter 3 and 4. (That is unless Chapters 3 and 4 completely destroy my theories/plot line, but that’s something to worry about on June 5th!)

How does controlling the KFC gang work?

At the beginning of this AU, Kris is controlled by one player while Frisk and Chara are controlled by another. The connection to these two players are lost/corrupted in the beginning few chapters and that leaves the three open to any and all players (you, the readers) to take control or influence their actions regardless of any resets or saves.  The words you comment on posts, the questions you ask, and the answers you give in polls can impact what happens in the story. Not everything will have an influence but it will always have a chance to.

How will you know what has influenced the story?

I will respond directly stating that it will have an impact. Most of the time I will state how it will influence the story, however, I do want to keep some things secret occasionally.

How do the players communicate to Kris, Frisk and Chara?

Players are able to communicate to them primarily through any screen such as a tv, computer, phone, ect. On occasion they can communicate to them via ominous voices inside their heads. Otherwise, players can not directly interact with their world and will not have a physical appearance. I should also add that only the KFC gang are able to see or hear the players' messages. No one else is able to.

RULES FOR ASKS & INFLUENCING THE STORY

In this AU, Frisk and Chara are 12 while Kris is 17. THEY ARE ALL NONBINARY so anything inappropriate, rude, or offensive will be deleted immediately.

I’m trying to stay as canon as possible, however, if your ask includes fangames or other AU’s (ex: Undertale Red and Yellow) I will try to work it into the story if I can. I’m not very knowledgeable about other AU’s but I’m willing to at least try.

Considering that I’m basically running both an ask blog and uploading a comic, I may not be able to answer right away. Please be patient with me, I’m doing my best over here…

RFERENCE SHEETS (WIP)

[ryder-writes]

Your Daughter is Getting Bullied- Dad!Kiribaku x Reader

CW: Bulling, your kid has a bruise, implication of Kirishima dealing with SH in the past

A/n: I randomly got motivation to write angry dad Kirishima so here we are lmao.  It is not said whether you had your daughter biologically or if she were adopted. If u read my Dad!Bakugo fic and recognize your daughters name no you don’t. Also u can tell when I lost motivation💀

WC: 1.1k

Eijiro Kirishima was blinded by rage. He couldn’t see anything but red.

"What do you mean my daughter is being bullied?!" He yelled, demanding an answer.

"Mr. Kirishima, please calm do-"

"Don’t you dare tell me to calm down!" He slammed his hands on the principal's desk. "When I come to pick up my daughter I should not see a bruise on her arm!"

"Mr. Kiri-"

"No. I'm going home to talk to my daughter and partners about what to do about your unprofessional and incompetent school staff." He spat. He turned around and grabbed his daughter's backpack from the office chair before walking toward the door. He stopped in the door way and turned his head back toward the principal. "Expect a letter from my office." He snarled. He made his way to his daughter's classroom, controlling his breathing as he walked. Once he was calm enough, he walked into the classroom.

"Dada!" Enya yelled, running to hug her dad.

"Hey, Sunshine." Eijiro smiled. He turned to her teacher. "Thank you so much for looking after her."

"Oh of course, Mr. Kirishima. I apologize for not noticing sooner." She apologized. He raised his hand;

"No, no. This isn't your fault." He sighed. "I want to say thank you for being such an amazing teacher. Enya really enjoys your class." He chuckles under his breath, "She talks about it all the time at home." The teacher smiled.

"I'm thankful that I could teach your daughter."

"Well, we should get home." Eijiro said as he picked up Enya. "Say goodbye, Sunshine." Enya turned around and waved:

"Bye-bye! See you tomorrow!" Eijiro bit his lip.

-

Eijiro turned the key and unlocked the front door to your house. Enya immediately ran inside to go greet you and Katsuki. He sighed and closed the door behind him. He dropped his duffel bag (filled with his hero gear) and Enya's backpack on the organizer by the door. He walked into the dining room to see Katsuki at the dinner table. Enya was on his lap, talking to him about her day. Eijiro assumed he was reading, as there was a book folded on the table, as well as his reading glasses perched on the top of his head. You were across the way in the kitchen, cooking dinner. He walked over to you, letting his head fall on your shoulder and his hands grab your waist.

"Hello, Ei." You chuckled as you turned your head and kissed his head. He grumbled in response. "What's wrong, love?" You asked. You knew that it wasn’t good to hide your emotions; Eijiro taught you that. He buried his head deeper into your shoulder and mumbled something. "Hmm?" You asked for clarification. Your moment, however, was interrupted by a loud voice.

"WHO THE HELL DID THIS TO YOU!?"

"Katsuki! Language!" You yelled, leaving Eijiro's grasp and making your way towards Katsuki. "Now, what…happened..." You were in shock. Right there, on your daughter's arm, was a bright purple and yellow bruise. You immediately ran over and crouched down next to your daughter (who was still on Katsuki's lap). "Are you okay, sweetheart?"

"Yeah, it doesn’t hurt anymore." She answered. In your peripheral, you saw Katsuki's eye twitch.

"Okay, that’s good. Go change out of your uniform then we'll have dinner, okay?" She nodded and walked away to her room. As soon as she was out of earshot, Katsuki dragged his hands across his face.

"Fucckk." He groaned. "Why would anyone do that to her?!" He stood up from his chair and started pacing. You grabbed his glasses off of his head, just incase he accidentally broke them from his rage again.

"I don’t know, Kats." You sighed. Your heart sunk. "Do you think it's because of us?"

"What? No, of course not baby." Eijiro comforted you by grabbing your hand.

"I don’t know." Katsuki interjected.

"Kat!"

"What? I mean it's possible. I know for a fact that no one else in her class has three parents." He reasoned. You shifted your weight, uncomfortable with the fact that Katsuki was probably right.

"Okay, but that doesn’t have to be the case." Eijiro tried to reason. "There could very well be another reason."

"Like what, Red?" Katsuki took a step toward Eijiro. "Fuckin' tell me what else." Eijiro remained silent. "Can't, can you?"

"Guys." You sighed. They both immediately stopped and looked at you in unison. "Let's just ask Enya." You suggested.

 Eijiro chuckled dryly:  "Yeah, that might be better."

-

"So, Squirt, do y'know why you got hurt?" Katsuki asked. You four were now in her room, putting her to bed.

"Well, Abby pushed me into my desk today." She answered.

"Did she say why?" You inquired.

"Uh- she said it was cause I didn’t have 'good normal parents'." She made air quotes with her hands. Your eyes all widened . Eijiro immediately stood up and left, clenching his fists. You noticed Enya watching him leave.

"Don’t worry sweetheart, Dada just needs some time." You kiss her forehead tell her goodnight before heading out to where Eijiro had gone. You found him pacing around the living room, hands mindlessly scratching at his arms. You immediately walked over in front of him and grabbed his hands, ceasing his movement. You interlaced you fingers with his, bringing his attention to the semicolon bracelet he wore.

He exhaled. "Thank you." You hummed in response. "I just don’t know what to do. I want what's best for her but… she loves that school."

"That doesn’t matter if she's getting hurt." Katsuki remarked from the hallway. "I don’t care what she thinks. I'm not willingly let her go to a school where she's getting bullied."

"Her opinion is still important, Kats." You reasoned.

"Yeah, yeah. Sure."

"Okay, but I think Katsuki is right, Hun." Eijiro Let go of one of your hands to grab onto one of Katsuki's. "I don’t feel safe sending her there anymore."

You sighed: "Yeah, you're right. I just feel bad for her."

-

"Dada, why didn’t you wake me up?"

"Oh, sorry Sunshine. You're not going to school today."

"Oh." Enya paused. "Why?"

"Uhm, we just want to make sure that you're getting a good education." Eijiro rubbed the back of his neck. You and Katsuki both knew that meant he was lying. Luckily, Enya hadn't realized that yet. You walked into the living room, seeing him sitting on the couch on his laptop, talking to Enya who had just woken up. He was looking at new schools, since his patrol wasn’t until later. You called Enya into the kitchen, telling her it was time for breakfast. Eijiro got up and joined her as well (Katsuki had left already).

"Honey, can we talk real quick?" You asked.

"Of course." He answered, following you into the hallway.

"I was thinking, what if she gets bullied at her new school?" You whispered, voice laced with concern. Ei gave you a sympathetic smile.

"I don’t think she will. And, even if she does," He rested his forehead against yours "we'll be there for her."

A/n Pt.2: Okay, okay. I know the ending sucks, I had plans to write more I swear but motivation's a bitch. Anyways, if you enjoyed Dad!Bakugo and Dad!Kirishima, feel free to check out my masterlist, with more dad content.

[such-expensive-mistakes]

Superpham AU (part 6)

Masterpost

Lois prides herself at being good at rolling with the unexpected. Unfortunately, all of her experience with aliens and supervillains and magic has not prepared her for Danny.

Danny has a disconcerting habit of dropping disturbing or traumatizing information in an off-hand way, seeming to not even realize the implications of his own words. It started with what he said about the dimension he'd grown up in discriminating against people with powers, then with what he'd said about the red son and the lack of superheroes, but it just keeps happening.

Lois tries not to call attention to it, because she prefers it to the alternative, which is Danny shutting himself up in his room and refusing to talk to any of them.

Lex Luthor is on the nightly news-- as he so often is-- and Lois has to explain the man's many crimes to Danny. (No, Jon, it is not a rant.)

"Oh," Danny says. "He sounds like Vlad."

"Vlad?" Lois asks.

"Yeah, Vlad Masters. He's my godfather. He's a total fruitloop who wanted to marry my mom and make me his son."

Lois carefully does not react. She wants Danny to tell her things. She wants to know what his life was like when she wasn't in it. "That sounds..."

"Yeah, he tried to clone me. Well, I guess he succeeded, but none of them were stable except for Ellie, and she wasn't really that stable to begin with."

"Ellie?"

"Yeah, short for Danielle. She went by Dani-with-an-I for a while, but she decided she wanted her own name."

That is not the part Lois was looking for clarification on. She goes with it anyway. "Tell me about her," Lois says, and tries not to be concerned about Danny’s descriptions of a teenage girl who apparently lives and travels on her own because she doesn't like to be stuck in one place. Ellie doesn't even get the full benefit of being quarter Kryptonian, living in a world with a red sun.

The four of them are sitting down to dinner-- pizza again; one of them should probably cook sometime this week, but Lois and Clark are both on deadlines-- when Clark asks Danny more about his adoptive family, the ones he grew up with.

He looks sad, the way he always does whenever his adoptive parents come up.   Lois can hardly blame him, when he lost them in such a sudden and traumatic way.  

"They're scientists," Danny says.  "Or they were.  They studied, um, the Ghost Zone and the things that live there.  They didn't really understand it at first-- they thought all the-- um, everything from there was evil and needed to be killed, but they learned they were wrong eventually."

Lois meets Clark's eyes and knows he is as concerned about what happened before that 'eventually' as she is.  Still, neither of them comment, not wanting Danny to clam up again..

Jon, however, has no such reservations.  "That's really messed up."

Danny shrugs.  "Yeah, kind of.  They came around, though.  And I think they blamed themselves for how bad the GIW got because they were the ones who designed the weapons."

"The GIW?" Lois asks, instead of what she really wants to know, which is: Your adoptive parents designed weapons to be used against beings from another dimension??? Did they know what you were? 

"Guys in White," Danny says.  "I don't think that was their real name, but they were from the government."

"Your parents built weapons for them?" Clark asks, his tone deceptively light.  "I thought they were scientists."

"They dabbled in a lot of things.  But they were fantastic engineers."  Danny segues into a story about some of the modifications his adoptive parents made to their car, which is a topic only slightly better for Lois's heart.

Later that night, Lois is sitting in bed, checking her emails on her phone, when Clark sits down next to her and turns on the white noise machine they keep on the nightstand.  (It's the only way to have private conversations when your child-- children-- have super-hearing.)

"I'm concerned about Danny," he says.

"No shit."  The more Danny tells them about the dimension he grew up in, the more Lois hates it.  "But there's nothing we can do now except be there for him."

"I know people who have traveled across dimensions, you know," Clark says.  "I could always ask for a favor."

"You won't," Lois says.  "Because if you do, I'm going to end up committing felonies in another dimension."  

Clark smiles humorlessly. "What makes you think I wouldn't be there with you?"

"Because you're a better person than I am."  Clark never believes her when she says that, but it's true.  Clark is a fundamentally good person.  Lois tries to be a good person, but there's a reason she's not a superhero.  

-----

Kon intended to stop by Metropolis several days ago.  Or at least call Clark back.  But he’d gotten sidetracked by an earthquake in Southeast Asia, and then by Dr Light causing problems in California.  

He gets a few hours of sleep back in Smallville, then remembers that he’d planned on dropping by Metropolis and meeting Danny days before.  He walks the last few blocks to Lois and Clark’s house— flying would be way too noticeable in their neighborhood— and lets himself in.  He walks up to the living room and spots Lois there, furiously typing on her laptop.  

Kon is man enough to admit, at least within his own head, that Lois kind of intimidates him. Sure, Clark is physically stronger, but there’s an intensity to Lois that Clark lacks.  She glances up at Kon, and even though she’s smiling, he still feels pinned under her gaze.  

Kon shifts uncomfortably, reminds himself that unless he turns into a corrupt businessman or something, he’s not actually in danger from Lois Lane.  

“You here to see Danny?” she asks.

“Yeah.”  Kon shoves his hands in his jacket pockets.  “I figured I should probably meet him.”

“He’s in his room,” Lois says.  “He’s not… It’s not a good day, but maybe he’ll talk to you.  He hasn’t exactly gotten the chance to be around anyone his own age since he showed up.”

Kon knocks on the door to Danny’s room.  

“Come in,” a voice calls from inside.

Kon’s first thought is that he looks more like Clark than Danny does.  Stupid; of course he does.  He’s Clark’s clone.  But then, Jon resembles Clark almost as strongly as Kon does, so maybe it wasn’t a completely stupid thought.

Danny is sprawled on his stomach across his bed, phone in his hand.  There’s a video playing on it— someone talking about the history of the Justice League— but he’s ignoring it, watching Kon with a wary expression.  The room is still as bland as it ever was; other than the clothes tossed haphazardly on the floor, there’s no sign a teenage boy lives here.

“I’m guessing you’re Kon?” 

“That’s me.”  They stare at each other awkwardly for a moment.  

“Have you actually seen any of Metropolis, or have you just been hanging out in here?” Kon asks.

“Lois took me shopping for some stuff,” Danny says.

“Okay, no,” Kon says.  “You have got to get out of this house.”  

“You don’t even live in Metropolis,” Danny says.  

Kon shrugs. “Doesn’t matter; I’ve spent more time here than you.” There’s an old-school arcade he’s been to a handful of times, and a couple of places to eat.  Anything has got to be better than Danny hanging out and brooding in this sad bedroom by himself.

It's a warm day outside.  The sun shines down on the two of them as they walk in near-silence toward downtown.  The awkward silence doesn't quite break until they're at the arcade, competing on an old racing game.  

"I don't think we have this one in my dimension.  The other dimension.  Whatever."  Danny says.

"Yeah?"  Kon speeds ahead of Danny in the game, just in time to cross the finish line.  Danny groans.

"Yeah, but this world doesn't seem to have Doomed, either," Danny says as they start another race.  "There's a lot of little differences like that."

"That's gotta be weird," Kon says.  

"Yeah, Clark kind of freaked out when I told him the sun there was red."

Yeah, Kon can see why.  They talk more as they play more video games, and Danny tells Kon about his friends and what they'd do when they were hanging out in his hometown of Amity Park.  The main people he talks about are his best friends, Sam and Tucker, and his older sister, Jazz, but he mentions a few others.  

"Wait, who is Ellie again?" Kon asks, after Danny shares a story about a prank she pulled on another kid at Danny's school.  They've left the arcade, and are hanging out at the diner a few blocks away.  It's not the coolest place-- in fact, it looks like a grandmother decorated it-- but Clark introduced Kon to it, and it has great food.

"Oh, I didn't tell you?" Danny asks.  "She's my clone."

Kon chokes a little on his soda.  "You have a clone?"

-----

Danny is probably being paranoid.

Scratch that, he's definitely being paranoid. Lois and Clark have been nothing but nice, and they're clearly used to weird things happening. Like, even aside from the whole alien superhero thing, Lois just saw a kid fall out of a portal and decided to help?  Plus, Clark is an actual superhero.  

Even his— the Fentons came around on the whole “ghost powers” thing.  Eventually.  But he’s gotten used to hiding, to trying to blend in.  

(And what had them accepting him done for them in the end?  They’re dead, the GIW killed them.)

He’d rather hide than suddenly discover that Lois and Clark aren’t cool with their long-lost son being half dead.

Some of his powers he can pass off as Kryptonian— super strength, flight, enhanced senses.  He knows Lois saw his ghost form, and though she hasn’t asked about it, he’s pretty sure it’s just a matter of time.  

These thoughts circle through his mind over and over, only leaving him temporarily when he’s hanging out with the Lane-Kents.  

His bio family.  

That’s not much better, though; there’s a sadness in Lois and Clark’s eyes whenever they look at him, although they try to hide it.  Jon just a kid, and clearly doesn’t know what to make of the whole situation.  Lois keeps saying they are going to introduce him to more people, especially people his own age, but Danny shies away from that.  He doesn’t want to meet more people.  He doesn’t want to get comfortable here.

Still, he’s glad he came out with Kon.  An afternoon of videogames and greasy food hasn’t solved any of his problems, but it’s a nice break, and Kon has already promised to introduce Danny to his friends— a whole team of teenage superheroes.

“I can’t get over how many heroes there are here,” Danny says.  “Like, why do you even need that many?”  Sure, it would have been nice to have some more backup when he was Phantom, but in this world there seems to be at least one superhero for every major city, plus some extra.

Kon shrugs. “Natural disasters, alien invasions, supervillains, street crime… No one can handle all of it.”

Out of all the things he’s encountered so far in this dimension, this might be Danny’s favorite.  Even more than the proven existence of aliens.  Back home, Amity Park needed Phantom, even if they hated him.  But the world here doesn’t need Phantom.  

It’s kind of freeing, and Danny hates it.  He doesn’t want to like anything about this dimension more than his own.  

Would it really be that bad?  You might be stuck here forever, a little voice inside his head whispers.  

He ignores it.

[theocddiaries]

[Shadow exits his room with a suitcase and heads toward the front door, accompanied by Rouge.] Shadow: Call me if anything happens. Rouge: What’s going to happen… Shadow: Anything. I’ll have my phone on at all times, and if not, you call Sonic. Rouge: Shadow, I lived alone before I adopted you and Omega. I’ll be fine for a week. Shadow: You didn’t adopt me-- Rouge: In my heart, I did. Shadow: …And I don’t know how you got to know me considering how you leave the house when I’m gone for just a couple of days. The mess-- Rouge [says the sentence along him]: --in this house is gonna hit the ceiling one day. Shadow: Hm. I’ve made a schedule, okay? With colours. It’s on the fridge, and there’s another copy on your closet door and on top of the TV. Rouge: Yeah, yeah… Shadow: I’m serious, I know you guys. No excuses of, ‘I’m tired from work,’ or ‘one more episode, then I’ll do it.’ Got it? Rouge: Okaaay. Shadow: Well… bye… [They hug quickly, and Shadow leaves the house. Rouge enters the living room, where Omega is watching TV.] Rouge: Omega, darling, can you wash the dishes? I’m meeting Amy. Omega: WHEN I FINISH THIS EPISODE. Rouge: Come on, you heard Shadow. Omega: YES, HE MADE A SCHEDULE. AND IT SAYS YOU’RE DOING THE DISHES TODAY. Rouge: Ugh, Omega, I’m tired from working. Omega: YOU'RE NOT TIRED TO HANG OUT WITH YOUR FRIENDS, THOUGH. Rouge: Oh, come on, you sound just like Shadow… well, we’ll clean it tomorrow. It’s not like there’s that many dishes. [3RD. Omega sits on the couch, only to get up. He pulls out a hard piece of bread from between the cushions.] Omega: WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO CLEAN THE COUCH? Rouge: …No idea. That schedule’s confusing. It says vacuum, but if you vacuum that, you’ll break the vacuum cleaner… Omega: SHOULD WE CALL SHADOW AND ASK FOR CLARIFICATION? Rouge: No, let him and Blue enjoy their week. It’s just a piece of bread, throw it away, and we’ll deep clean tomorrow. [5TH. Rouge opens the fridge, where there’s just a rotten lemon and a dish.] Rouge: Omega, why is there an empty dish in the fridge?? Omega: IT DIDN’T FIT IN THE SINK. Rouge: Hm… I think we should start cleaning. Omega: WHAT ABOUT LUNCH? Rouge: You don’t eat. Omega: BUT YOU DO, AND YOU’LL HAVE TO GO SHOPPING. Rouge: Ugh, now? I’ll just order takeout. Look, tomorrow we really get to cleaning, okay? [THE DAY SHADOW RETURNS. The house is full of dirty laundry in the living room, blankets tangled on the couch, popcorn leftovers and empty chip bags on the table, and all the dirty dishes in the sink next to half-open cookie boxes.] Rouge: Gaia… Even Diogenes would run away if he saw how we’re living… How did we get to this point?? Omega: ACTUALLY, DIOGENES-- Rouge: Omega, not now. Shadow’s going to kill us. Omega: ACCORDING TO MY DATABASE, YOU HAVE EMPIRICAL REASONS TO FEAR SHADOW’S REACTION. BUT YOU NEED NOT FEAR IT BECAUSE IN THE END, IT’LL BE SOMETHING LIKE: 'THE HELL. I’VE SEEN PIGS WITH MORE NEATNESS IN THEIR PIGSTIES. BUT I FORGIVE YOU AND WILL CLEAN IT MYSELF'. Rouge: You’re right, with how picky he is, he might not even say his little phrase… [Shadow enters the house.] Shadow: Hello. [freezes in the doorway while he processes the state of the house]: The hell… I’ve seen pigs with more neatness in their pigsties! [Omega looks at Rouge, who smiles at him conspiratorially.] Shadow: Well, I’m not forgiving this time! [grabs his suitcase again]: I’m leaving and I won’t come back until this place is shining like gold! Rouge: What?? But… Shadow: Don’t even try it! [storms out, slamming the door.] Rouge: … Omega: MISCALCULATION. UPDATING DATABASE.

[hobunaga]

UPDATED VERSION, thank you @guzhufuren for the additional info!!!

my friend wanted me to make a chart of, Meet you at the Blossom, characters and what their relationship is. Now I don't know everything, I don't even know if I got the names correct but I hope this clarifies a little what is going on here.

here are some clarifications(careful, spoilers)

Xiaobao's parents: Xiaobao's dad found Xiaobao's mom wandering around town one day and assumed she was the daughter of a wealthy family and had lived a really sheltered life(she is). He got her drunk, they slept together and he took responsibility by marrying her and taking care of her.

Tong'en: Now I don't know for sure if she loved any of the men that I attached her to, but they were in love with her so I kinda just added it in case her feelings were genuine or if she was only doing what she had to to survive. The only person I can confirm she truly cared for is Zongzheng Qiyuan and they had a brotherly and sisterly bond only.

Xue Xiaoyu: Now ya'll might be wondering why she has a red line towards Xiaobao and it's kinda given that she has a big crush on him. Her cousin however is his true love so I think she'll put on her big girl pants eventually and move on. Her brother is Xue Lianyu, Xiaobao's best friend. She is also the cousin of Huai'en.

Que Siming and Jinbao: They have 2 names cause in the extra I read, they had changed their names at least once. Jinbao was originally known as Wang Erhu and Que Siming was called Yue Siming. Que Siming was most likely adopted by the doctor whom was caring for him after his father was sentenced for treason and Jinbao was sold to Xiaobao at a young age.

Jinbao and Zhao Cai and Que Siming: Similar to the Xiaobao, Su Yin, and Huai'en jealousy trope, Que Siming's jealousy is mainly centered around Jinbao and Zhao Cai's relationship. Now I don't know if Jinbao has a thing for Zhao Cai, but Jinbao maybe masturbated to Zhao Cai once??? or Zhao Cai ran into him while he was masturbating??? I don't know... if someone can interpret this scene let me know because English is not my first language.

Zhao Cai and Medicine Girl: In Jinbao's side story, Jinbao Marries a Wife, it was stated that Zhao Cai was in a heated relationship with this medicine girl and frequently went out to see her during the time Xiaobao was still sick with the cold needle poison. I don't know if they end up together at the end but it was the only relationship that was mentioned in the story for him.

Shaoyu and Su Yin: So apparently there is a one sided interest in their interactions according to the awe inspiring @guzhufuren . When I read it, I wasn't sure how to exactly interpret their relationship but I can see it now that Shaoyu is just as obsessive and possessive as his older brother is. Good luck getting away, Su Yin!

Shaoyu and Huai'en: Half brothers with a somewhat refreshing ending in the live action that hints that there is a possibility of them bonding later in the future. Now I'm not sure which woman mothered Shaoyu, but I'm going to assume it's the ex empress which makes them half-brothers(well Tong'en only birthed one child so it's a given). Now usually if the mother loses the favor of the emperor to even be demoted out of being empress, that must mean that it heavily affects Shaoyu's standing as crown prince as well. Luckily no other princes were mentioned so it's more likely that Huai'en won't compete for the throne and Shaoyu will still inherit it.

The Zongzhen 4 brothers: Now they're just fucking insane and the only sane one is Zongzhen Qiyuan. Even the emperor is a little cuckoo but hey, that's what stress does to you right? They need to sit down, relax, and chill a little. I'm so glad two of them greatly support Huai'en's decisions.

ps: I'm sorry if I got the names wrong or I didn't name a few of the characters. Either way, I think this is the relationship chart?

[en-djinn]

I've been meaning to ask if you have any opinions about The Goddess. I feel like a lot of the more recent Warlock stuff is kinda trying to ignore that she existed :')

so i finally finished infinity crusade and am in the last stretch of infinity watch. finished it abt a week ago bt i wanted to let it marinate in my head a little before saying anything. this is the first time im talking abt smth so recent to me so this will be a lil undercooked wrt my thoughts and very meandering, but i think the act of writing this out will help me anyway loll, it usually does

right away. infinity crusade spoilers obvs.

first of all ill talk abt ur last comment there, and i wanna ask fr further clarification on what exactly u mean by that bt ill just cover both things i thought u meant anyway.

so its pretty obvious that the goddess represents the past, right. warlock is the present, magus is the future. thats why the goddess isnt present in things like the magus is. her stuff is already over. warlock isnt going to revert coz hes already here as he is, the man that he chose to be (transmasc W!).

the goddess is his previous incarnations that were a woman. now that itself is a very interesting topic i wish theyd touched more on bt i also think its good that its kept vague (or at least i hope it is) coz the room to speculate is what makes it fun to think abt. the goddess is a version of him that no longer exists. in fact i think theres a strong case to view this all thru the lens of transmasculinity in general, as a trans man myself i see it like the goddess being yourself before you Knew. i used to have thoughts like 'maybe she wouldve been happier. but it wouldnt have been me. it would have been someone else.' thats what the goddess feels like to me. and magus feels a lot like the childish toxic masculinity of throwing ur weight around as a man for the first time, compensating for what u cant quite believe u truly are.

warlock is the one who is comfortable with both halves, hes chosen to be a man but has accepted that these stereotypical gender roles are arbitrary and unhelpful.

anyway as for the other thing u couldve meant, her being ignored in the actual narrative as never having happened? to be fair im not sure how she would be involved unless it was part of the story of the other 'perfect humans' and i havent rly gotten to them yet! ive seen Her but not as she returns as ayesha, and i havent seen the others yet either. but i dont see why the goddess shouldnt be involved with them in the future (assuming she isnt already). adam and the goddess are technically the same being but theyre not the same person in the way that warlock and magus are. so i think broaching that topic w the actual women seems like the way to go? again especially seeing as Her is also very transgender. they are ALL trans to me btw because theyre nonhumans who are adopting to the human gender binary, which makes them inherently trans. but some will have a stronger case or allegory to project than others, is more what i mean. bt again, i havent gotten to them yet so i rly cant say a whole lot. id like to come back to this tho once i have.

anyway, that stuff aside... where to even start.

i DO love that they keep a balance w morality/intent even tho they say that magus is evil and goddess is good. magus wants infinite life and a deathless world, goddess wants pure nothingness and death for all. and both perspectives do make sense. what the goddess wants Would mean an end to all pain, and like the magus, shes lashing out in frustration at adam for not seeing and accepting all the sides of himself. though in her case, adam just didnt know she existed at all. generally i also love that adam's whole Thing is that hes obsessive and swings wildly between extremes and magus+goddess both represent these extremes. theyre him dialled up to 11. in that way the goddess is the perfect counterbalance to both warlock and magus. bt hey starlin's understanding of the character he essentially Made (obviously not made as a fictional character but Made him into who he is) is really impressive to see every time, love the way he writes things as character studies first.

i also love the implication that adam was Supposed to have a childhood. and that the gotg cartoon that i loved for its depiction of adams origins is actually way closer to canon than id thought!

it could be elaborate headcanon bt to me this means that every previous incarnation of himself grew up from being small, and his most recent birth at the enclave is an outlier. a sort of trapping of his soul or smth. which actually makes more sense considering later on when magus is also reborn as an actual child.

hmm i lost my train of thought cz i was watching vids w someone. bt honestly im not sure i have a ton more to say specifically abt her? the rest of my infinity crusade thoughts are ummm. predictably. about magus. i REALLY enjoyed it as a whole tho, it was fantastic. even tho i dislike the big teamup stuff in general cz it spreads the narrative too thin and u cant focus on any one char which means all the less important ones are gonna be ooc to some degree. hmmm. idk. my train of thought is totally gone wwww, if u wanted to ask abt smth more specific then go ahead bt ig thats my thoughts for now

[gallusrostromegalus]

So far I count 3 ranking shinigami who didn't start off human (Gin, Komamura, Kenpachi). How common is this? (I'm guessing sort of rare, because if it was common more people would be clocking Gin as nonhuman rather than the creepiest human in the room) And are Komamura's (and his adopted parent's) attempts at hiding it normal for nonhumans? Wait - is *Yoruichi* 100% human?

Its a lot more common in AEIWAM than in canon, and Komamura is in for more than a few surprises once his helmet comes off.

****

"Um. Komamura-Taicho?" A small voice asked from the door.

Sajin looked up- it was early in the afternoon, and the paperwork had slowed down for the first time since Tousen-

-Since the Ryoka incident some three weeks ago. Peering around the doorway was one of the newer recruits to the Seventh Division-

"Miss Fubuki?" He asked. It was a point of pride to have the name of every member of his division memorized within a month of their recruitment, and she had been here some years.

"Yessir!" she snapped to attention, stepping into the doorway. She was a darling thing, with large blue eyes and white hair befitting her name. "Er, Sorry to interrupt, but, um-" She fidgeted with the clipboard she was holding.

"It's alright." he said, putting his pen down and sitting up a bit to face her. "Despite recent changes to my appearance, I do not bite."

She blinked at him for a moment, then grinned, relieved. "My apologies sir- I- I don't think you ever *would*, sir. Captain Zaraki, perhaps but- sorry, that was very rude of me."

"No, he absolutely does, but I believe he considers it a sign of affection." Sajin nodded, and she giggled. "What was it you needed?"

"Well, ah. It is about your um-" she gestured at her own face. "-Lieutenant Hisagi asked for help with this month's newsletter and I- well, I thought lots of people would have questions about you, and I actually couldn't find much about the history or legal standing of... non-human people? in the archives, so, if it's not too invasive, um. Would you be willing to do an interview, of sorts? Less about yourself, really, so much as um. People like you?" She babbled, not quite looking at him, but holding her ground. She was nervous but she seemed more awkward than frightened. A good sign, perhaps?

He considered this for a moment, looking at the clock on his desk. "How long would this take?" he frowned.

"Oh! Um, well, I wrote up like, 20 questions- you don't have to answer all of them, but I figured that would be enough, and- well, I've never actually interviewed anyone before." She considered. "Not more than half an hour, probably?"

"Yes, I think I have the time. I need to be at an appointment at 3:30, but no pressing matters before then." he nodded, gesturing for her to take a seat opposite his desk.

"Oh! thank you sir!" She beamed and sat down, a cool breeze floating through the door after her and Sajin hand to slap down a paper that attempted to flutter off his desk. "Ah- early fall breezes." She nodded.

"Autumn can't come soon enough. Summer is difficult when you wear a fur coat you can't take off." he sighed.

Fubuki looked up at him, then quickly jotted it down on her notepad.

"You have excellent shorthand." he noted.

"Oh! Thank you! I learned it when I was working up North with the central 46's survey team." She smiled. "Um, well, first question, which- well, I know it's not strictly my business, or anyone else's for that matter but, ah- What ARE you, actually?"

"I believe there are a great many introductory primers on different types of animal in the Seiretei library, mostly in the children's section." Sajin teased and Fubuki giggled. "But I understand. There are a great many rumors and some clarification may be in order. I am from a very ancient clan of Beastfolk from the mountains of the east 80th district. There are many types of Beastfolk, but all share some combination of human and animal anatomical features, along with the intellect of men, or better."

"-and your family is.. dogs?" Fubuki asked.

"Wolves." He corrected, and watched her cross out a word and replace it with decided firmness. "Thank you for comprehending the difference."

"I ah, grew up in... not-people wolf country." She nodded. "That does make me extremely sure you don't bite, actually. I lived out in sheep country and never got chased by wolves while minding the herd but the neighbor's dogs were constantly after the lambs."

"Out near Nemuro then?" he asked,the name of a far northeastern district.

"Y-yeah!" She sputtered, taken aback. "-Not relatives of yours?"

"No, but it is where the Court Guard gets the mutton for it's rations from." he nodded.

"Right." She nodded, "So, are there a lot of Beastfolk?"

"Not quite so many as there are humans in soul society, but yes, a great many. There aren't cities per se, because most of us move with the seasons, but there are places where SOMEONE is always passing through, and permanent structures have been established." he explained.

Fubuki nodded. "-And does the soul society have, like? Treaties with these people? Or are we just not in contact that often?"

"Oh no, we have several standing peace treaties with the Beastfolk. It's how I came to meet Yamamoto-sotaicho, actually-" He laughed quietly.

Fubuki looked up, curious. "We do? I swear I went through the entire xenobiology section..."

"-They're in the archives under Resource Management and Clan Politics." He explained. "The most recent one was the Bo River Border Treaty in 1552, which forbid any industrial practice by anyone from Soul Society to occur east of River Bo. Several of the clans had designs on clear-cutting the old-growth forest there for profit, despite it being home to a great many Beastfolk and minor Kami. The captain-general's interest was originally more in preventing the clans from accumulating the kind of wealth that would allow them to establish armies or operating 'company towns' or other chicanery so far from court guard. I was asked by The Forest Guard to act as a negotiator because I had a good reputation with the humans in the east from working as a priest, but perhaps more because I was one of the few people that ah, actually spoke human."

"Wait, wait, wait-" Fubuki interrupted, scribbling as fast as she could. "One- you used to be a priest?"

"I still am, if needed." Sajin smiled. "I specialize in exorcisms and ritual purification so it wasn't much of a jump for me to become a Shinigami, especially after the captain-general asked me to come and gave me a letter of recommendation."

"Huh. I applied here as soon as I was old enough and could afford to, so all I ever did was odd jobs before this. I guess it never occurred to me that some people might have had whole careers before becoming Shinigami." Fubuki considered, writing. "Second- that was like, half a millennium ago? How old are you?"

Sajin cocked his head at her, smirking.

"Sorry! I know, you're not supposed to ask people that I just- I don't know, I thought you couldn't be much more than 200 at most for some reason, but if you were already a priest 500 years ago-?"

Sajin laughed. "I'll take it as a compliment then- I'm Seven Hundred and Twelve."

Fubuki blinked. "...You're almost as old as Ukitake-taicho?"

"Oh, he'll love to hear that- he's almost Nine Hundred" Sajin grinned, affectionately teasing the young thing.

Fubuki frowned, eyes darting around as she tried to do some mental math. "Er. If I can ask something potentially offensive?"

Sajin nodded.

"...How old is that in Wolfman years?"

Sajin somewhat literally barked a laugh.

"I mean- well, there's calendar age and life age for shinigami and Ukitake-taicho is Eight Hundred Eighty-Nine, yeah, but he's also like, in his mid-forties? What's er, what's Seven hudred twelve in Wolfman life age? Is it like Shinigami where people age at different rates and you're way older than most wolfmen or everyone ages differently or are you guys all multi-centurians or -?" Fubuki babbled, trying to clarify, another cold gust coming in through the window and scattering papers, interrupting her.

"No, no- I understand, it's just very funny." Sajin smiled as he picked up the top of his inbox from the floor. "-Weird, the forecast said it was supposed to be hot and sunny all week but I wonder if we're getting rain?" he muttered.

"I- I wouldn't know." Fubuki muttered, hiding behind her clipboard. "I always forget to check the weather."

"Don't worry about it- before I tell you, if Ukitake is in his Mid-forties, how old do you think I am in the same relative Life Age?"

"Um..." Fubuki studied him for a moment. "...40? 42?"

Sajin chuckled.

"I'm way off, aren't I?" She groaned.

"You share the same good judgement as the captain-general, if it makes you feel better. I was... two hundred sixty-three when we met, and even though I was quite young, I was already taller than Yamamoto-Sama, and for the first few hours we knew each other, he'd only heard me translating his words into Wolf for the Beastfolk- most of the languages are mutually intelligible, to a degree- and not my Human voice. "The meeting was attacked by Private Forces hired by several of the interests of the logging and mining corporations, and of the noble houses, and we were forced to fight back- Not knowing any better, I was sure The Forest God would be well-protected and able to fend for themselves, but the humans looked very small, so... I put myself between the attackers and Yamamoto-Sama." He sighed, deeply embarrassed.

Fubuki failed to stifle a laugh.

"In hindsight, that was ridiculous! Like a mouse defending a bear from a bug! But, it apparently impressed him and he very generously offered me a full scholarship to Shinigami Academy, both as an act of peace between Soul Society and Beastfolk, and because he liked 'the cut of your jib'." Sajin said. "...I'm still not entirely sure what a Jib is or how you cut it."

"Wow!" Fubuki perked up, writing as fast as she could. "...But you didn't- er. I also looked you up in the archives before coming in- But you didn't enter for another three centuries?"

"Ah. You see, you and the captain-general misjudged my age in the same fashion. As I had to explain to him then, I couldn't join the academy because-" Sajin nodded solemnly, clearing his throat and scaling his voice up a few octaves like it had been back then "-In human years, I'm only ten."

Fubuki snorted loudly, buckling over her clipboard and laughing hysterically. "What?" She yelped between giggles.

"I'm only 22 in Human Life Age now!" Sajin protested, mock-offended and Fubuki laughed even harder.

"Oh no! Oh no!" She gasped. "I said forty because you seem really calm and mature, but you're actually REALLY calm and-"

Something small and hard clattered to the floor and rolled under the desk and Fubuki abruptly went silent.

"Miss Fubuki?" he asked.

"I. I dropped my pen." She sputtered, crouching down from her seat and searching for it.

"...The pen behind your ear?" Sajin asked, leaning over to peer down at her.

"Oh, uh, that's a spare but I don't want to lose this one-" She said, voice shaking now.

"I think it rolled under here-" Sajin said, pushing his chair back and looking in the footwell of his desk. "-Hm? What's this?" he muttered, reaching down and picking the strange object up.

It looked almost like a small pearl, except it was perfectly spherical and translucent, nacreous colors shimmering deep into the smooth stone. "What a lovely thing this is..." He muttered, turning it over. "Did you lose an earring or something?" He said, offering it back to Fubuki-

She looked awful.

All the blood had drained from her face, and her expression was one of dire terror, eyes fixed on the small stone in his fingers.

"...Is there something you want to tell me, Miss Fubuki?" Sajin asked, voice gentle. -and his other hand on Tenken's hilt.

"What's the actual legal status of Nonhuman Persons in Seireitei?" She asked, slowly looking up at him, face gaunt.

Sajin regarded her for a long moment before lightly dropping the shimmering stone in his pen tray and sitting back, shoulders down and hackles low. "The law makes no distinction between human and non-human persons. If someone has a Soul Security Number, they're a citizen of Soul Society, and therefore entitled to the same protections and expected to follow the same regulations as everyone else."

She stared at him for a long time, lip trembling, and then back at the stone. "You're sure?" She asked, voice barely a whisper.

"I am entirely certain. I was present at the writing of those laws, which were amended after the River Bo treaty." He nodded.

"-but you hid your appearance for so long?" she asked, trembling in her seat.

Sajin looked out the window, a gesture of nonaggression. "I was not afraid at first, especially after meeting Yamamoto-sama, and to tell the truth, I was never frightened of humans harming me- but as I grew up and reached my adult height and lost the puppyfat, humans began to avoid me. "Less than twenty years after I met the general, I was trying to help a woman caught in a river current and when she saw me swimming toward her, she swam deeper into the current, rather than let me get close. It was a near thing, but after I managed to catch her arm, she screamed bloody murder the whole way back to shore and sprinted away from me as soon as she felt solid ground." he explained. "It... hurt. To see someone so frightened of me, and I took to keeping my face hidden so I could move about without accidentally terrorizing people."

Fubuki peeked up at him, not writing anything down, arms wrapped around herself. "...and? Since you stopped wearing your helmet?"

"...Everyone has been so kind. A few awkward questions at worst, but someone went through the snack cabinet and removed all the raisins and grapes, and someone else got rid of that wretched weathervane on the roof with the shriek I don't think most humans can hear." He smiled, a little sad. "I feel foolish, that I did not trust my friends and colleagues, who trained with me, who swore to die with me, and who trust me to lead them- I am sorry I didn't trust them sooner."

Fubuki nodded slowly, still ashen, eyes still fixed on the glittering stone.

"...but I am strong. Physically intimidating. An Apex Predator. People in general would prefer to avoid such confrontation, but that is not the case for all- What did you call us?" he asked.

Fubuki looked up at him, shaking. "N-nonhuman persons, sir."

"-for all of us." Sajin smiled gently.

Fubuki nodded, silent.

"...You're from Nemuro, right?" he asked. "Beautiful country up there- and cold- it's high in the mountains and in the north-most corner of the eastern districts. How long have you been with the Seventh Division, Miss Fubuki?"

"Three and a half years, sir. Straight out of the academy." She croaked, voice raw and frightened.

Sajin nodded. "Three and a half years here, six at the academy, and it probably took you several months to travel from Nemuro to Seireitei."

"Yes, sir."

"About ten years ago, there was a terrible case the tenth division had to handle in the living world." he said, deliberately not looking at Fubuki. "A human gangster had managed to kidnap an Ice Apparition somehow, and had imprisoned and tortured her for the purpose of creating Hiruseki Stones, which are the solidified tears of an Ice Apparition."

Fubuki shuddered, opening and closing her mouth a few times before she finally gathered the words together. "...Yukina is my first cousin, sir."

Sajin nodded, giving her space to speak.

"...when she got home alive, we were all so relieved, but- Oh gods. The things he did to her. And men are no better on this side of death- you know what they were going to do to Mononoke Forest! So- so- So I figured, the closer I am to danger, the farther I might be from harm? Nobody never think to look in the court guard for another Ice Apparition, we're all out on frozen mountaintops, not working in the building next door!" she laughed, high and terrified.

"It's- Everyone here is so kind, and- and- and- it's like you say, we trained together, we fight together, we die together but- but you're never really quite sure, are you? What's going to happen, when the cat gets out of the bag?" She grimaced up at him, before returning her gaze to the stone.

"I- I was devastated, when Aizen- you know. But the next day, when Lieutenant Iba came in with the news and told everyone to get rid of the grapes and the weathervane and oil the door to the storage closet- I was. I was so stunned and- and- I had this crazy idea that it'd be alright. It'd be alright if everyone knew. It would be okay to laugh for real at jokes or to come to work if I have hayfever making my eyes run or- or to just have a damn cry like everyone else in the division did that day." She continued, teeth bared like a fox in a snare.

"Is it?" She asked, blinking up at him, the rims of her eyes bright red. "Is it going to be okay, sir?"

Slowly, Sajin sat up and delicately picked up the Hiruseki stone.

Fubuki watched him, shaking.

Carefully, he set it in the middle of the blotter on his desk, put his thumb over it,

-And crushed it into a fine dust.

"I promise, it will all be alright, Miss Fubuki." He said offering her an open hand as he swept the dust off his desk like it were common lint.

She slowly reached up, fingertips delicately touching his, before suddenly bolting out of her chair and hiding her face in his shoulder, sobbing.

"I'm Sorry!" She wailed between wet, ugly sobs. "I'msorryI'msorryI'msorryI'msorryI'msorryI'msorryI'msorry-"

"There is nothing to apologize for." Sajin sighed, gently embracing the girl, letting her hide her face in the fur of his neck as she crumpled against him, crying like a child. He could feel the fur under her getting coated in something wet, then cold and hard- the nacreous coating of Hiruseki stone coalescing on his chest.

"Uh. Sir?" Iba asked, sticking his head in the door.

"Its alright." he nodded. "Miss Fubuki has been very brave and a crisis averted."

"...cool?" Iba nodded, still puzzled. "Does she want a juice box or something?"

"Miss Fubuki?" he asked, peering down at her. Her face was red and eyes bloodshot but the horrible terror was gone.

"Um. Yes. Please? Thank you?" She mumbled, standing up and about to wipe her eyes off on her sleeve when Sajin stopped her and handed her a handkerchief instead.

Iba clicked his tongue and pointed a finger gun at them before vanishing back down the hall.

"...You realize that thing was probably worth more than the entire Kuchiki fortune, right?" she giggled from behind the handkerchief., still shaking.

"Then I will need to come up with more embarrassing stories from my youth when the next Widows and Orphans fundraiser comes around." he shrugged.

Fubuki sob-giggled from behind the handkerchief.

"I say that entirely in jest. You are under no obligation to provide any form of fundraising, least of all by that means." He explained, tone serious again. "-nor do you need to tell anyone, until you want to. Nobody will hear it from me."

"Thank you sir." Fubuki sighed, finally pulling the cloth away, trying to fold it, and making it snap instead. "Oh, for fuckssake- I'll get it clean somehow sir-"

"Keep it." He smiled and she finally managed to give him a weak grin back. "...If I may make a request for you to take under consideration though?"

"Yes, sir?" Fubuki asked, perking up a bit.

"Mrs. Oyashiro is scheduled to retire in a few weeks, and I will have an opening for a new secretary." Sajin explained, sitting back and fiddling with a pen. "Relatedly, you seem to possess a strong sense of operational security, and take excellent shorthand. Even more importantly-"

Komamura leaned back in his chair, pointing to a tree in the courtyard visible through his window, upon which a large thermometer hung. "-As you can see, it is a disgustingly hot Nintey-Four degrees outside and probably similarly humid, but your mere presence here has lowered the temperature in my office to a very pleasant Fifty-Eight degrees."

"Ah." Fubuki snickered, genuine this time. "Summer is hard when you're wearing a fur coat you can't take off?"

"You understand me exactly." He nodded.

"I'll put my application in, Sir." She bowed.

"Thank you. I also look forward to reading your interview."

"Oh!" She straightened up, and grabbed the clipboard. "Um, yeah, I think I have enough but, well, one last question?"

"Yes?" Sajin asked, ear cocked.

"...If you weren't afraid of people, and you grew to trust that people wouldn't be afraid of you- what was the hardest part of keeping your identity concealed?"

Sajin stared into the distance, thinking for a moment.

"Actually? Not making a million canine-related jokes a minute." he smirked. "-Pup's out of the bag though!"

"Oh no," groaned Fubuki, grinning.

[stylesclarified]

Louis Tomlinson “The Communist King” is a liar who exploits his fans—Part I

As promised, this post exists thanks to The Mayor of the Hags and her usual “Louis good, Harry bad” nonsense.

Generally speaking, I don’t have a problem with Louis himself—I dislike him, sure, but my real issue is with his fans. This blog is about providing receipts for a fairer fandom, not defending Harry Styles’ honor (god knows he doesn’t need me for that).

That said, The Mayor of the Hags isn’t pulling this out of thin air. Louis Tomlinson is a shady motherfucker and a liar, so let’s get into it.

INTRO

Before we start, a necessary clarification: Understanding someone’s upbringing and economic status in the UK requires knowing its class system—a deeply ingrained structure that goes beyond money.

Yes, Louis’ family was working class. That’s not up for debate. But so were the other four members of One Direction—the difference is, they weren’t marketed that way.

Initially, Louis wasn’t in control of that image either. 1D’s team assigned each member a persona, and his was the “working-class underdog.” His family history—his teen mom, absent dad, and their supposed struggles—was hammered into fans’ heads.

The 1D documentary reinforced this. His mom spoke about their hardships, Louis talked about sharing his wages, and his role as the eldest helping his siblings was a recurring theme. It wasn’t just mentioned—it was drilled in. And while it wasn’t false, it was exaggerated for a narrative.

And this branding wasn’t aimed at class-conscious Brits. Why? Two reasons:

1D’s fanbase was global, which meant most of them wouldn’t grasp UK class nuances.

1D’s fanbase was also mainly pre-teens, so even British fans—it’d mostly flow right by them.

What fans would understand is poverty. That’s what Louis’ branding tapped into.

All five 1D members came from working-class backgrounds. None were well-off. If they really wanted to highlight financial hardship within the group, the person that actually struggled was Zayn—but instead, they were too busy whitewashing him, erasing his Pakistani father, and branding him as “mysterious” to bother. Emphasizing his economic background would’ve clashed with that strategy.

THE REALITY

Louis’ mom, Johannah, was 18 when he was born, and his biological father, Troy Austin, left when Louis was just a baby—both true facts.

Being a teenage single mom can be tough financially, but what often gets overlooked is that Johannah met Mark Tomlinson soon after Troy left. Mark became a father figure to Louis, legally adopted him, and went on to have four more kids with Johannah.

Mark often shares old photos on his Instagram, like the ones below, showing how long he’s been in Louis’ life. In the first, Louis is blowing out four candles on Christmas Eve 1995. In the second, from December 1994, Mark captions it “Christmas past with Louis & Daddy.” These photos confirm Mark was already a father figure to Louis by the time he was two, spending Christmas together and calling himself “Daddy” before Louis turned three.

Louis had a present father who gave him his last name and was there throughout his childhood. Mark and Johannah married and stayed together until late 2010 or early 2011, by which point Louis was already in One Direction, meaning he grew up in a stable two-parent household.

His eldest sister, Lottie, was born in 1998, and his second sister, Félicité, in 2000—when Louis was six and eight years old, respectively.

Around this time, Johannah attended Leeds University and graduated with a degree in Midwifery in 2002. Leeds University confirmed this, featuring her in an alumni magazine alongside Ben Winston, who graduated two years later

For those unfamiliar with the UK education system, studying at Leeds University can be expensive and is considered one of the top universities in the country (though not quite at the level of Oxbridge). To put its prestige into perspective, it was good enough for the son of a Baron—Ben Winston. His father, Baron Robert Winston, has held a seat in the House of Lords since 1995.

The fact that Johannah was able to attend Leeds while raising three children—presumably on just Mark’s paycheck—suggests they were financially stable enough to support her education, their home, and their kids.

Mark worked as a commercial truck salesman, a well-paying role, especially since commercial trucks typically have higher profit margins than regular cars. After graduating, Johannah worked as a midwife at an NHS hospital, a job that also offers a solid income. By 2004, when Louis was 12, Johannah gave birth to twins, Daisy and Phoebe, who appeared as extras on an ITV show, Fat Friends. Johannah also worked as a chaperone on set, where she met James Corden.

Louis had a few TV roles as well, including an extra part in the film If I Had You and in the drama series Waterloo Road.

In the early 2000s, Johannah likely earned £18K–22K a year as a midwife, depending on her band, plus extra income from her chaperone work. Mark’s base salary would’ve been slightly above minimum wage, so around £15K, with commissions potentially doubling or even tripling that, bringing his total income to £30K–60K+.

Together, their combined income would have ranged from £50K to £82K+ annually.

For context, the median household income in Doncaster in 2024 was around £24K. In the 2000s, that figure was likely even lower, meaning the Tomlinsons' combined income would have easily doubled or even tripled the local average.

This was reflected in their lifestyle. The family regularly went on vacations, and Louis went to France every single year since he was born.

Sometimes twice a year…

Going to France every year, sometimes twice a year, for a big family of seven would be nearly impossible for a financially struggling family. While it's not super expensive for a British family to go to France, the frequency and size of the trips suggest the Tomlinsons were financially comfortable, not struggling.

In fact, Louis even taught Harry how to ski—though Harry was supposed to be “the posh one”... Skiing is definitely not a cheap hobby, further highlighting the Tomlinsons' financial stability.

Louis owned a Clio as a teenager, and his girlfriend at the time, Hannah, confirmed it on Twitter. Although her account has since been deleted, you can still find a link to the tweet.

For Americans, this might not seem that significant, but in the UK, it's much less common for teenagers—especially those from lower-income backgrounds—to own a car. In fact, a 2017 poll showed that only 55% of people aged 18-29 owned any car or motor vehicle (including bikes). And that’s up to age twenty-nine.

In the UK, you can't drive until you're 17. By 2012, only 10% of 17-year-olds had a driver's license, according to the Department for Transport.

This highlights how rare it was for Louis to not only drive but also own his own car. If he was able to sell it when he moved to London with One Direction, then it clearly wasn’t a family car.

Louis also owned a mid-tier smartphone, a laptop with editing software (for uploading covers to his YouTube channel), gaming consoles, and expensive clothes. He took acting lessons and even owned a keyboard.

The Tomlinsons lived in a detached house in Bessacarr, the most expensive part of Doncaster. Detached houses are typically the most desirable types of property since they don't share walls with neighbors. In contrast, semi-detached homes and terraced houses are more common in working-class areas.

A TikToker from the area did a tour of Louis’ childhood home and his grandparents’ house (neither of which are owned by the family anymore). The Tomlinsons had owned the detached house since at least Lottie’s early childhood.

I want to make this clear: none of this means his family was wealthy, nor does it erase their working-class status. The area they lived in, their family history, and the jobs they held were all firmly working class. With such a large family, they likely faced financial difficulties, especially when Louis was younger.

What this does negate, however, is Louis’ repeated claims of severe financial hardship—his insistence that they were a low-income family who couldn’t afford anything.

Louis' constant emphasis on his struggles feels forced, like a strategy to appear relatable despite being a millionaire charging fans—who are actually struggling, in some cases—premium prices. His image is a caricature, and we’ll continue to deconstruct it. He didn’t just exaggerate; he outright lied about some of these claims.

At some point, I may dedicate a post to Harry’s background, but for now, it’s important to note that while he was marketed as “posh,” he actually came from a working-class family, facing many of the same struggles as Louis. Although his family lived in more affluent areas for part of his childhood, his childhood home was a terraced house, described as “humble” in publications.

Before settling in Holmes Chapel, Harry’s family lived in Evesham and above a pub in Northwich, both of which were far less affluent. His parents separated when he was seven, and his mother remarried, only to separate again when Harry was twelve. Both Harry and his sister, Gemma, were latchkey kids due to their mother's long working hours.

Robin, Harry's stepdad, didn’t come into his life until Harry was 13/14, and they didn’t marry until Harry was 19. By then, Harry had been in 1D for years. While Robin was wealthier, he was only a significant presence in Harry’s life for a very short period prior to the band.

So why was Harry marketed as “posh”? Every pop band has a “posh” member. In Take That, it was Gary Barlow. In the Spice Girls, they went all in and literally nicknamed Victoria Adams “Posh Spice.” It’s a strategy to ensure all audiences have someone they can relate to. But since all the members of One Direction were decidedly working class, the closest one to “posh” was Harry—simply by virtue of living in a slightly more affluent area. (Crewe, where Holmes Chapel is located, has a median income just £2K above Doncaster’s, so while property and education were definitely “higher level,” it was nowhere near the vast difference we were led to believe).

Perceptions of British social class aside, Louis and Harry’s financial realities were strikingly similar. In fact, on paper, Louis seemed to live with a bit more luxury—at least until Robin entered the picture.

THE HAMMERING

Louis was marketed by 1D’s team as the “working-class lad,” with a heavy emphasis on financial struggles and his family background. While this wasn’t his responsibility, once he went solo, he fully embraced it, making it a core part of his brand.

It’s normal to mention your background in interviews, but what’s odd is when it appears in every single one of them. Take this one from Noisey (now Vice) in 2017, where he’s introduced as:

The fact that Louis’ background was so average, so relatable, was already inherently part of his appeal. Rather than trying to shrug off his working class Northern roots, he vehemently embraced them. There was nothing about Louis that screamed ‘showbiz.’ He didn’t come from money. He hadn’t been to Brit School.

They then position him as the opposite of the other 1D members, especially Harry. (They even link an article where they snobbishly criticize Harry, but I won’t dive into that here to avoid getting derailed.)

Even today, seven years later, when he couldn’t live a life further from what he grew up knowing, he clings onto his background with an almost commendable stubbornness. While the others from the band—particularly Harry Styles and Zayn Malik, and even Liam Payne to a certain degree—seem to revel in the starry sheen of pop fame by dating other high-profile figures, being seen on the front row at fashion shows or stumbling out of A-list parties and having the sort of meticulously crafted marketing campaigns that are designed to create intrigue, Louis has always appeared to shy away from that side of things; with one foot cautiously dipped into the lifestyle, and the other firmly on the ground.

Louis would then go on about Doncaster, how his mates kept him grounded, and how he doesn’t like the Hollywood party scene. That’s basically the theme of every interview he’s had since, up until today.

I can’t think of anything more boring than going through all of Louis’ interviews in detail, so I’ll just share short snippets with sources of a few of them instead.

HYPEBEAST - 2023

Many know Louis Tomlinson as a Doncaster lad-turned-pop-icon and part of era-defining boyband, One Direction. But despite his superstar status, the 31-year-old has never lost touch with his relaxed Northern soul. It’s been central to everything he puts his mind to, from music to football… and now, fashion.

That’s how it starts, btw.

FAR OUT MAGAZINE - 2019

His working-class Yorkshire heritage, he told me, is what has made him the man he is today: “You’ve got to be fucking humble where we’re from you know what I mean? Because otherwise you get called out like ‘who the fuck do you think you are?’”. The greatest takeaway from our conversation is that Louis Tomlinson is still that music enthusiast that entered the music industry in 2010 who, despite all the success and fame, has managed to stay grounded.

A music enthusiast who hasn’t learned how to play a single instrument in 15 years and cannot talk about songwriting coherently for the life of him. Sure. Whatever you say.

THE GUARDIAN - 2017

Tomlinson gives the example of how he first became famous. Born in Doncaster in 1991 he was raised by his mother, Johannah Deakin, and later also by her new partner Mark Tomlinson. (...)  And as a self-aware northerner, from a proudly working class family (...)

“Later also,” the wording implies much later, not at TWO YEARS OLD. I also thought they might not mention his family was working class in one interview. Alas.

THE GUARDIAN - 2019

As a child, growing up in Doncaster with his mum Johannah, who raised him alone until she married Tomlinson’s stepfather, he loved performing. “I liked to be the class clown, I liked to make people laugh, to show off, all that.” When his younger twin sisters were cast on TV dramas, he would sometimes go along as their chaperone, earning £30. “Where I’m from, we don’t have anyone who’s been on TV or anything like that, so it was super-exciting,” he says. He ended up picking up work as an extra. “The pinnacle of my acting career was one line on an ITV drama. I don’t even know if they used my scene,” he says with a laugh. When he was 15, he joined a drama group in Barnsley, which his mum would take him to when she could afford it. “I think I was confused, thinking I wanted to act when actually what I wanted to do was perform.”

Once again, minimizing the role of his stepfather to paint this picture of a single mom. Mark raised him for SIXTEEN YEARS. Johannah was a single mom for TWO.

She took him to lessons “when she could afford it.” The constant drilling of these financial struggles drips drips drips from every single word in every single interview. This interview in particular will be brought up later again.

THE GUARDIAN - 2022

I worked at Doncaster Rovers as the guy you bought the pies off. We had a little scheme. If the pie fell on the floor, even foil side up, it couldn’t be sold. I didn’t have a lot of money at the time, so a lot went overboard, because the pies were banging. I’ve not been on a night out in Doncaster for years. It’s a combination of being too busy and the fact there’s always a chancer who wants to give you a slap. I don’t want to get my head kicked in. I’m low-maintenance. I don’t have any major diva requests. As long as I’ve got coffee and cigarettes, I’m sound.

THE TELEGRAPH - 2022

Scruffily unshaven, in gym wear and trainers, the 30-year-old hops up to open a window, while chatting away in a friendly and engaged manner. “I never really chose this life,” he insists, with a strong Doncaster accent (though he lives in Hertfordshire now). “I auditioned for X Factor and crossed me fingers. And now, here I am.”

In. Every. Interview. He has to tack that in. He just has to.

METRO - 2022

“That’s the sound that I would say defined growing up for me. That kind of music is big in the North of England full stop and especially in working class town-forward-slash-just-been-made-a-city Doncaster. I spent a lot of my time as a young lad in this indie bar called Priory, and that’s how I discovered a lot about music that I’ve grown up to love.”

This one is hilarious, because the question was about what type of music he liked and why. He could be asked what he had for breakfast and he’d reply, “Well, as a working-class lad from Doncaster...” To be perfectly honest? I presume he already has said something to that effect.

“UNDER THE TONGUE”, Adidas Documentary - 2024

“We didn’t have a load of money when I were younger, so I didn’t have great boots growing up. Like anyone who didn’t have a pair of Predators, of course I always aspired to have a pair.”

It’s a 2-minute appearance and he manages to sneak that in. Insanity.

This talking point is persistent in everything he does. Even in stuff like his track-by-track commentary, particularly for his second album, FitF.

The man wore hammer and sickle clothes, for crying out loud.

The literal communist symbol. I’m not here to do the meme...

But I am here to tell you that a communist Louis Tomlinson is not. He exploits his fans, especially his most ardent ones, who tend to be the ones who suffer economic hardships the most—the ones he’s trying to be relatable to. The ones who see themselves in his inane discourse. But we’ll get to that.

His whole “anarchy” as an asthetic—particularly as a tattoo— is grating as fuck.

Louis is a multi-millionnaire who hoards wealth through very little hardship and who nowadays makes a ton of money with the least amount of effort. This goes against the very fabric of the anarchist movement.

He’s also a very proud Englishman who even in fucking INDIA pointed to a fan wearing an England shirt in the audience:

Overt nationalism coming from a self-ascribed anarchist, particularly from one who comes from a colony system as cruel and long-lived as the British Empire over India, is the exact opposite of what anarchism stands for.

Remember when he did an entire music video for his main solo single in 2017 in Doncaster:

Whatever, cool, if it wasn’t for the fact that it came with an entire round of press with this as a central talking point. And a behind the scenes music video where the main focus is once again, Doncaster and how working class it is.

He also wrote a couple of songs about this or related to it, particularly Common People:

And with this song, we start the next section.

THE LIES

If he was simply hyper-focused on this upbringing of his—despite the fact that he’s spent about half his life living as a millionnaire already and well, everything else I’ve already covered, it’d be a little comical, whatever, but he outright lies and exaggerates constantly.

The lyrics to Common People... the only reason he gets away with these lies is that he’s not successful enough for non-fans to notice, and his fans would jump off a building if he asked them to.

I came from a good home A house full of terraced dreams That was enough for me You know, you had to see it to believe

You... you didn’t live in a terraced house, Louis. You lived in a quite big detached house in Bessaccar, with a two-income household that doubled (maybe even tripled) the median for the area. WHY ARE YOU OUTRIGHT LYING? You know who lived in terraced/semi-detached houses? ALL OF YOUR 1D BANDMATES. And NONE OF THEM made their working-class background their entire personality!

It’s insidious, the way he lies. In his documentary, he has his grandparents talk about how little money his mom had and how they lived in a little apartment. Then Louis says that his biological dad left him and he was alone with his mom, but that he didn’t “miss the love of a father” because his mom “doubled that.”

Then Lottie talks about how he had four sisters, and Louis takes over and says he loved being “the only lad.” The implication being here that his mother was taking care of five children on her own. That there was no father.

All of this conversation happens over footage of Louis, his mom, and his sisters. He completely erases his stepfather from a huge chunk of his life. A stepfather that was there for him since he was two. There are not even pictures of Mark during this segment, a feat that was probably quite hard to accomplish, considering he was literally there. This was part of an extended trailer for the documentary, meaning the part most people would watch (from 2 mins on).

Of course, you could try to find a way to justify it, somehow. Maybe he’s not on good terms with his stepdad? Maybe his stepdad did something or something happened, and Louis made the operative decision not to include him for that reason? But his stepdad is in the documentary. In fact, he shows up right after this section to talk about Louis auditioning for Grease when he was a teenager.

So, the decision to completely erase his stepdad—the man who adopted him and gave him his last name when he was a toddler—from a huge chunk of his life, specifically highlighting his and his mom’s struggles, is simply glaring. It’s obviously purposeful. It’s trying to rewrite history and present a completely different reality. One could maybe overlook it as a strange decision, but with no ulterior motives, if Louis hadn’t spent the last several years of his solo career continuously underlining his “struggles” every step of the way.

But he does. Victimization is one of his biggest tools, and being “a working class lad” is at the forefront of this image.

He lied when he said that his mom took him to drama class “when she could afford it” considering in other interviews he said he just wasn’t consistent with it.

He talked about not being able to afford expensive clothes, but he... did.... he owned expensive clothes. He didn’t own designer clothes. But he owned expensive clothes. He even tweeted about buying them before joining the band.

He lied when he said that he couldn’t afford the boots he wanted. Louis you had multiple jobs. You were well-off enough to afford a car. Don’t piss me the fuck off. Maybe your mom didn’t think it was a good idea to spend £150 on overpriced boots, when perfectly good ones could go for as cheap as £60 to £30, but that’s called BEING MIDDLE CLASS. It’s not, “we didn’t have a lot of money.”

He’s so detached from reality that he thinks not being able to splash out buying Predator Adidas is somehow a class signifier. LOUIS, MOST KIDS HAD PARENTS WHO WOULD REFUSE THAT SORT OF SHALLOW SPENDING.

The way he frames things, the way he insists on this talking point. He probably has bought his own lies at this point. There are a ton of others, but they’re smaller. Just white lies. It’d take me forever to break them down one by one, but the thing about them is that they add up to create a picture that simply isn’t true.

THE SHADE

He uses this marketing strategy of his to throw shade at... well, at a lot of people. You’ve seen how one of the earliest articles of his solo career positioned him against Harry, Liam, and Zayn. Also against the obscure figure of “the A-list celebrity.” Against popstars.

Mainly, though, his antagonist is Harry. He throws a lot of shade towards Harry, but never with his chest.

Remember that 2019 The Guardian interview that I said would come up again?

“If I went back to Doncaster and I was dripping in Gucci or whatever, I’d probably get whacked. I’m always very conscious of not acting too big for my boots. It’s the people around me who keep me sane and normal, because they give me insight into real life.”

He said that in September 2019, just a couple of weeks after Harry became the most visible Gucci ambassador and the face of their gender neutral fragrance

But shade aside, because that was 100% purposeful, just two years before saying this... he was dripping with Gucci, and Stella McCartney, and Off White... where? Yep, in Doncaster.

And his “mates” were right there...

And no, it wasn’t an isolated event. He wore Gucci a ton of times. He wore Gucci when hanging out with friends, walking down the street, at concerts, etc. It wasn’t that a stylist put him in a brand and he had no idea or anything like that.

The man, to this day, wears a ton of designer clothes. Prada, Alexander Wang, Burberry, Balenciaga, Givenchy, Armani. Dior, Balmain, Ralph Lauren. There’s nothing wrong with that, of course. The problem is that he acts like wearing these clothes would be that he’d be ashamed to be caught doing. As if he was the opposite of everything Harry represents (something that The Mayor of the Hags constantly drones about).

It’s extremely hypocritical because he does the same thing.

Harry just wears cute clothes, mostly. Sometimes trippy. Louis wears sweatpants that cost a fortune for no reason. Which is fine—he’s a filthy rich celebrity. JUST FUCKING OWN IT, MAN.

A few months after Harry’s debut album came out—a concise record that was 10 tracks long and lasted 40:18 mins—Louis was asked if his debut album would have more than 10 tracks, to which he replied:

That... that is not how music works. Music is art. The important part of music is that it’s good, that it moves something in you, that you enjoy it. If anything, the important part of it in terms of value is if it has replay. I’ve legit never seen anyone else say “value for money” in terms of tracks on an album. He’s so fucking try-hard and corny.

ANYWAY, Louis’ debut album, despite the Communist King’s comments, did have more than 10 tracks... 12, to be exact. It was, incidentally, shorter than HS1, clocking at 39:30 mins. So, by Louis’ own definition, I guess that’s... not value for money?

We covered the other instances of shade already, like when he shaded Harry for not taking drugs while he was in 1D. And there are, of course, others, but they’re not necessarily tied to this whole class/money thing—that I can remember! If you have more examples, feel free to send them over and I’ll add them.

His fans do the heavy lifting for him on this topic. Because he has repeated these talking points so many times that they automatically attack Harry with them.

Louis has somehow convinced them that when he pisses on them, it’s rain. Because make no mistake, The Communist King, pisses on his fans. And that’s what we’ll talk about in part II.

THE STANDARD INTERVIEW

So, we arrived at the last part of this post. It’s funny because I started writing it before this interview came out.

[The following few paragraphs are background info on the writer and the publication. If you want to skip to the interview analysis, you can!

It was written by Joe Bromley, Fashion Editor at The Standard. Bromley’s career dates back to ES Magazine, a key publication in cultural influence. He joined The Evening Standard in 2021 and became junior writer in 2023, with a meteoric rise to editor. He’s also contributed to Lampoon Mag, Yahoo UK, and The Irish Independent. The Evening Standard is a reputable publication in its own right.

Of course, Louis’ fans tried to claim that Bromley is “a Harrie” or was paid by Harry’s team to write such a negative piece. The evidence for this? A year ago, he wrote one article about Harry. It’s not overtly positive and has some snide comments and shade, but it leans positive overall. Otherwise, there’s no connection between them. Bromley doesn’t even follow Harry on social media. He does follow Harry Lambert (Harry’s stylist) and Alessandro Michele, but both are designers, so, as a Fashion Editor, it’s his job to follow them.

Naturally, no one can organically be bemused by Louis’ ridiculous attempt at branding. Joe must be on someone’s payroll!

Why would Harry’s team care to do this? Well, The Hags have somehow convinced themselves that, despite Louis’ solo career going nowhere while Harry’s has skyrocketed, Harry (or his team) is somehow very threatened by Louis and his potential. They can’t explain why anyone—let alone Harry Styles—would be threatened by someone who can’t sing, can’t play any instruments, has the charisma of a cardboard box, and takes zero care of his physical appearance. But, you know, if you repeat something enough times, even if you can’t back it up, it becomes reality.]

Louis describes himself as “chavvy.” This isn’t the first time he’s done this—he’s used the term multiple times.

And this, this misuse of the term chav and what it implies, is exactly why his whole persona is so problematic.

A chav is not simply a young person from a working-class background whose parents didn’t allow them to buy Adidas Predators. A chav is a term that implies actual struggle. It implies growing up on a council estate or a deprived neighborhood, not being able to afford food, lacking access to proper education, enduring an unstable home environment, and growing up surrounded by violence. It implies being unsafe and ostracized by society.

Louis faced none of this. He grew up in a stable, two-parent, two-income household that earned double the median income, with access to technology, education, and a supportive family. He lived in a beautiful, affluent neighbourhood. He owned a fucking car. He might have been a little rowdy and couldn’t afford very expensive boots—that doesn’t make him a chav.

A regular person could describe themselves as a chav without “earning it,” and we could have a lighthearted discussion on whether that’s appropriate. But Louis isn’t a regular person. He’s been crafting this persona for years. He’s been building this fake background since he first went solo, and now, as a fucking millionaire, he’s using it as an excuse to sell overpriced apparel to young girls.

To some degree, it’s reminiscent of the conversation about Harry and queerness. So, why is it problematic for Louis to do this and not for Harry? There are three main reasons.

Harry hasn’t claimed an identity that doesn’t belong to him. In fact, he’s deliberately not claimed any. Queerness isn’t something we can physically measure—it’s something inherent that can change and evolve. No one could assert that he’s lying if he did claim it, but the fact is, he hasn’t. Louis, on the other hand, has. Loudly, repeatedly. He slapped the chav label on himself, a label that can be physically measured, and one he decidedly hasn’t earned.

What Harry adopted is an aesthetic. Aesthetics can’t be copyrighted, and there’s nothing inherently problematic about adopting one. In fact, it would be problematic to assume someone is part of a specific community because of the clothes they wear. If Louis had simply adopted a “chav aesthetic,” it might be a little cringe at his 33 years of age, but there’d be nothing wrong with it.

Harry is not ascribing or perpetuating negative stereotypes to queerness or to the aesthetic surrounding it... As you’re about to see, Louis is.

This caricature Louis creates only serves to denigrate and vilify the working class he wants to use for his image. The portrayal of being loud, irresponsible, constantly partying, not dressing up for events, cursing inappropriately, and showing disinterest in culture is rooted in harmful stereotypes. It normalizes them, especially for his global audience, many of whom wouldn’t fully understand what the term even means.

“There’s a very, very chavvy aesthetic in Doncaster, at least when I was growing up. That’s exactly who I am and the kind of stuff that I like.”

This quote highlights exactly what’s wrong with his persona. For most people deemed “chavs” in the real world, it’s not an aesthetic—it’s their lives. It’s their prospects for the future. It’s the violence they face every day, the deprivation, and the pain of broken households. They can’t just put on a “chav costume” and use it to sell overpriced, glorified merch to teenagers, then take it off when it’s no longer convenient.

“I don’t think it’s a bad word, not to me.”

Well, it doesn’t matter what it means to you, Louis. I know it might be hard to believe, but you’re not the center of the universe. What matters is what the term means culturally and the negative connotations it carries. The term chav is generally deemed as social racism. Its connotations are overwhelmingly negative—they have affected entire generations of low-income men and women. And you’re helping prolong the stigma.

“To me it’s about culture. It might mean other things to other people.”

What culture? You know nothing about culture. You’ve admitted you don’t read books, explore cities, try new foods, or listen to other genres of music. In this very interview, you even admitted you can’t name a single thing you like about London—one of the most culturally rich cities in the world, where you’ve lived for almost half your life. You also admitted you wouldn’t even know where to move if you wanted to.

You have no grasp of culture. You’re entitled, privileged, and have the narrowest view of the world. It’s not that “chav” might mean other things to other people—it’s that it does. But you wouldn’t know that, because that would require you to take your eyes off your own navel for two seconds.

Your understanding of the world and what being working class means hasn’t evolved since you were 18. You don’t have an adult perspective on the cultural and socioeconomic struggles that come with being low income and marginalized. It’s why you equate not being able to buy Adidas Predators with “not having money.” You didn’t experience actual deprivation or marginalization as a child, had everything you could ever wish for as soon as you became an adult, and never showed an ounce of curiosity to dig deeper or gain at least an outsider’s perspective.

You’re a fraud. The editor of The Standard saw right through you. That’s why he pointed out your actual height and the fact that you wear concealer. It’s why he implied that you weren’t being genuine when you went on about loving your fans’ invasive attitude. It’s why he demeaned your clothing line and your environment.

Your fans will continue to make excuses for your shortcomings. They’ll keep blaming everyone else for it—your management, your label, your PR agent, your friends, your sisters, Harry Styles, Harry Styles’ team, Harry Styles’ fans—anyone but the real culprit: YOU.

Everyone else sees right through it.

Part II should be up shortly. And, if I dare say so myself, it’s particularly cutting.

[lullabysbride]

Okay i have like... a shit tone of question your au- so prepare yourself !

1 : about the other ancients, legendaries, the beasts, the most important cookies (like the minions : nutmeg tiger, caramel arrow), the faeries (elder faery and co), the rest of the cookies of darkness (specially Matcha ! She dark enchantress daughter) and the bravegang (ginger brave and co) ?

2 : is dark enchantress going to become white lily again, or will it be like og canon and tvey will both be alive, or is white lily like... truly dead

3 : also, what happened to white lily ?

4 : and can we draw the cookies characters for your au or do you wanna do everything...?

That's all I'm going to ask, for now ^^"

Soul Eater AU 🍰🍴

Hi hi! Oh my, this is going to be a long one! I hope this answers anything, if you need any clarification please just send me another ask and I'll happily answer 🤍

1 : All the ancients are currently teachers at the DWMA. PV is the homeroom teacher of our main group (RV, Lico, Pastry, Parfait, Aloe, Cy etc.)

There are only two beasts, who are witches and our main antagonists- Shadow Milk and Silent Salt. I don't have plans to add the other three. The faeries are exchange students and Elder Faerie is currently travelling.

All the legendaries are 3rd year students - except Millennial Tree, who is Lord Death in this AU. Reference Here

Most important epic cookies would be DWMA students unless stated otherwise.

- The Beast minions are not students and are either witches themselves or affiliated with witches and therefore are in hiding in Witch Town.. or trying to sneak into the academy 🐍

For the COD, almost all of them are living in the large house of DE as foster children. Matcha is DE only blood child and RV is the only adopted one.

Currently RV, Lico, Pomegranate, Affogato and Matcha all live together in the DE Mansion. Dark Choco only stays there during the school semester and for holidays he goes and lives with his Dad and younger siblings Carrow and Chip. 

- Bravegang does not exist currently (as does any of the child cookies like Crepe, Sorbet, Squid Ink, Peppermint, Poison Mushroom etc). They only exist in the future timeline where our main protags have already graduated and settled into their adult lives. I will make art for this at a later date

2 and 3. I've explained what happened to DE in a previous post! But TLDR, an accident occurred many years ago and WL got transformed into a witch. DEs Soul is split into two, WL still technically exists but only in the Soul Dimension and can only be accessed by resonating with DE.

4. Yes absolutely! I'd love to see anyone's drawings of my au and your additions. All I ask is that you tag and credit me and be mindful of what I've already created as canon, ik there's a lot to keep track but I'm open to head canons so just make a note on Ur post/submission (⁠人⁠ ⁠•͈⁠ᴗ⁠•͈⁠)