#0 haven’t had a white friend since middle school it’s not for me I don’t like being an accessory

[sunaswife]

A Suna Rintarou Series |

Summary: Suna was the best boyfriend you could ask for, after fighting with your inner demons that screamed you were ugly, worthless, and annoying. You finally decided to go the next step with your boyfriend, only to find out it was all a game.

AN: PART 6 lol after the last chspter i knew I had to give you some suna vs tsumu content

Warnings: underaged drinking, smut, guys talking badly about women, heartbreak, messed up shit that you shouldn’t do and a bit of fluff if you squint

Disc three-slide two: Miya Atsumu 🏐

The two second years silently watched as Y/N walked away and was bombarded by her best friend. “What are you doing, ‘Tsumu?” Suna asked, “Well I mean, Jamie did say that I had a better chance at getting with her than you.” He had a mischievous smirk on his face. “You think treating her with kindness is gonna get you somewhere and I think the complete opposite. I’ll seduce her and eventually she’ll fall for me.” He shrugged. This definitely pissed off Suna. You were his, not Atsumu’s.

Suna to a step near Atsumu, grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and brought him close. “I’m only going to tell you this once. Stay away. She’s mine already, you lost. Eventually she’ll come crawling to me.” He said lowly and shoved the twin away. Suna turned and walked to class and never looked back.

Atsumu chuckled and then quickly apologized to the people around him who saw the whole encounter. His fangirls came up and asked if he was okay but he shrugged them off and said he was fine.

Atsumu went to his locker to grab his stuff and headed to class. He couldn’t stop thinking about your chubby cheeks and your flushed face. Suna was right, you did seem like a goody two shoes, and you didn’t seem so uptight like Suna hypothesized. It was obvious how innocent you were because any little thing made your face turn into a darker shade and Atsumu felt something in his chest. It wasn’t love he knew that for a fact. It felt a little bit like lust and desire. An infatuation if you will.

If only I saw you first

He was pretty annoyed you were in Suna’s class and not in his or else Atsumu would have sweeped you off your feet already. He wanted to see what was under your uniform, what sounds you made, how inexperienced you were so Atsumu could play with you. But you “weren’t” his. You belonged to Suna.

But if Atsumu could convince you to leave pussy bangs for him then he’ll make sure you’ll get treated right. Like how a proper princess should. Atsumu could fake being your Prince Charming if that’s what you wanted. All he wanted to see was you in his jersey with cute white panties and probably some thigh high socks.

He wondered how you would look with your hair down since it was up in a ponytail and how it would feel between his fingers. Whether that be pulling it while pounding you or brushing it out of your face during aftercare.

“I swear you could cut the tension with a knife in here.” Osamu pointed out as he walked in between his brother and his best friend. “Not my fault Suna is the jealous type.” Atsumu muttered. “Bold of you to assume I’m jealous, I just don’t want you touching and eye fucking what’s mine.” Suna shot back. “So you’re finally dating her?” Osamu asked as they stepped into the club room. “Yeah on the date I made a bet with her, she lost. I won, like always. And now she’s my girlfriend.” Suna emphasized on the my and glanced at Atsumu. “I honestly wasn’t going to say anything until I saw how freaking cute she is. Now I’m down to see who will win.” Atsumu declared.

“You’re both lame.” Osamu muttered and left them behind after he finished changing, just so he can get another glance of Suna’s cute little girlfriend.

The three second years saw how you got along with the coach and how you helped him and Kita out with little things here and there during their practice. Right now you were collecting some scattered balls, they were warming up for their practice match today and Atsumu saw you on the opposite side of the court as he practiced his serves.

He wanted to scare you to see your cute reaction. So while you were talking to Kita who was at a distance with a ball in your hands and a smile grazing your face. He tossed the ball up, and jumped but at that moment you took a few steps back right where he was about to hit. And before he could do anything he accidentally hit the ball directly at you. Everything was almost like in slow motion.

This wasn’t part of the plan, he didn’t want to hurt you at all. He knew he was gonna get an earful and he’d have to apologize for hurting you.

“Y/N watch out—“ You heard and turned your head to see the ball coming your way. Before you could even think you dropped the ball in your hands and slightly did a split step back to receive it.

Growing up you and your cousin were both in love with volleyball. It definitely had something to do with your grandfather. He had taught you and Tobio how to play since before you both could even walk. Photos of a one year old you and a few month old Tobio trying to eat a volleyball was always something your grandpa used to tease you both about. (He kept a picture in his wallet)

You and Tobio both became setters in elementary and middle school but when your grandpa suddenly passed away you lost that passion to play and decided it would be best to quit then bring the team down. Tobio became angry very quickly when things didn’t go his way and both of your personalities turned 180. Everything went even more down hill when your parents suddenly moved Hyōgo and you went to Inarizaki instead of Shiratorizawa in Miyagi like how you and Tobio planned on going.

And since you were used to not running from the ball, the most logical thing to do was to receive it. “DID YOU SEE THAT?!” You turned excitedly to Kita. “I haven’t played in almost two years and I still did an amazing receive!” Your face lit up and the twins as well as Suna had the pikachu meme face. “I didn’t know you knew how to play.” Ojiro told you. “My grandpa showed me when I was younger but I decided not to join when I started highschool so I could focus more on my education.” You half lied.

Atsumu was pleased to see your excited face and decided it was better than seeing a scared reaction.

Miya | 0

Kageyama | 1

Previously

Next part

Series Masterlist

AN: Imagine the twins and Suna fighting over you CuZ i cAnT 😫😫

Taglist: @therealwalmartjesus @differentballooncollection @aaesuki @compromised-rodent @atsunflower @kagsh0e @dope-squish @prettysetterboiss @june-phantom @tomo-uwu @woshimai @austriasmariazelle @xrnia @chichi-chanischibi @changkyunslovespot @katsulia @aprettyfruit @shut-your-eyes-kiss-me-goodbye @tvbiio @sun-daddy-yoriichi @kamenoyaki @ppangiiroo @loeyprivvv @kmskj92 @sarahvvictoria @tris-does-stuff @lovinnoya

[cheri-translates]

[CN] Victor’s Encounter Date (Eng Translation)

🍒 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for a date which has not been released in English servers! 🍒

Edit: This date has been released in EN!

The date begins with MC in her office at 11pm, preparing Victor’s “big surprise”

Over the past two weeks, she has been sending Victor small gifts to express her gratitude for his help in getting her a smooth interview with Mr Sheng, a real estate tycoon

While she’s in the office, Victor calls her regarding the puppy apron he received

Overall, he would give brief comments on these gifts. He would only say a word of thanks when he occasionally comes across a gift which suits his tastes. 

As for the puppy apron I sent today...

Before I can continue asking him about the apron, Victor has already changed the topic. 

Victor: If you’re willing to spend all your time on official business, you wouldn’t need to stay up every day... work is never-ending. It’s about time to go home and rest. 

MC: Eh? 

How does he know that I haven’t returned home to rest yet?

I hastily look out the window. A black car is stationary under the streetlamp. Even though I can’t see the car plate clearly, my instincts tell me that it’s Victor. 

MC: Why are you here? 

Victor: I was just passing by. 

Really...

Victor: Come down. I’ll send you home. 

MC: Okay! I’ll pack my things and head down.

Victor: There doesn’t seem to be a big proposal recently. Why do you have to stay till so late? 

My heart rattles, and I hurriedly find a reason to get by.

MC: Maybe my mood hasn’t been good recently, so I’m always not in the zone when doing work. 

I thought Victor would respond to my words with taunting remarks. Instead his tone slows down, revealing his certainty in me. 

Victor: The interview you did with Mr Sheng wasn’t bad. There’s no need to be too impatient, or give yourself too much stress. The accumulation of work always requires time.

Just before I turn the lights off, I toss another glance at the present on the table. Even though he can’t see my expression, I can’t help but smile and nod. 

MC: All right.

~

The next day, Mr Sheng sends her an invitation to a club to meet some of his friends in the industry, mentioning that MC’s interviews have had a positive effect on his company’s reputation

She agrees because it’s an opportunity to expand her network

When she arrives at the club, Victor happens to be there too

Mr Sheng receives a phone call and leaves Victor and MC alone 

Victor doesn’t let her drink alcohol, and orders her a glass of warm water instead:

Noticing me look longingly at the beautifully coloured tequila sunrise in his hand, he puts a small red paper umbrella into my cup. 

Later on, MC finds herself with nothing to do, so Victor stuffs a cue stick into her hand and suggests they have a game of billiards

MC suggests that if she wins, he has to pass her proposal

She had spent two months on the proposal, but Victor had put it down, saying that it's overly risky

MC: Don’t underestimate me! I’ve won second place in my school’s billiards competition.

While I was prepared for his taunting remarks, Victor grows silent instead.

His interest seems to be piqued, and he sits sideways on the billiard table. 

Victor: You’ve left the nest?

He chalks the tip of the cue stick slowly. Seeing that I didn’t say a word, he lifts his eyes towards me, as though genuinely wanting to know my answer to this question. 

Actually...

These types of situations happen from time to time. After all, no one wants the proposals they’ve worked hard on to be rejected. 

As long as Victor doesn’t completely reject the proposal, I’ll keep on striving.

Come to think of it, this seems to be the first time he has commented on my efforts to keep striving.

Victor: All right. We’ll have one round. 

Without waiting for my response, he has already made a decision. His low voice has a hint of joy in it. 

I hold my breath and find the most comfortable angle to strike the ball. The colourful balls crash and collide, and one of them rolls in a straight line to the lower right corner--

MC: Yes!

Victor looks at the colourful ball as it rolls into the bag. His brows are raised slightly, and he is clearly surprised. 

Victor: No wonder you dared to challenge me today.

MC: The stereotype you have of me is too deep. I’m not really a dummy!

Victor: A dummy’s luck just tends to be better.

My desire to win is ignited. No matter what, I’m going to fight back against his ridicule.

MC: Watch carefully - this is skill, not luck!

Victor leans at the corner of the billiard table, his arms folded. It’s as though he is intrigued, and has an expression which says that he’s going to continue appreciating my “performance”. 

My cue stick moves forward, and the white ball leaves my corner, colliding firmly against a bunch of colourful pool balls, and then gets hit into the diagonal bottom pocket...

At the very same moment, I can clearly hear Victor’s chuckle. 

Victor: Mm, your skills are not bad. 

MC: There’s no need to be too happy. It’s 1 against 0. I’m in the lead. 

Victor takes two steps forward. He retrieves the white ball from the bag, gets into position, and leans down slowly. 

He isn’t anxious to enter the game at all. He adjusts the angle several times before lifting his head to look at me. 

Victor: If you lose, you’re not allowed to cry.

MC: Are you treating me like a child?

Right after the words leave my mouth, the two balls that are hit roll outwards with a “ping”. One rolls into the middle bag, and one rolls into the bottom bag. 

At the same time, he stands in position without a hint of hesitation, and strikes. The “ping ping” sounds of impact reverberate continuously in the room--

I lean against the wall nervously, “appreciating” how Victor makes shot after shot, striking the balls into the hole.

His calm expression and skilful techniques completely strip the game of suspense. 

He stops his movements and looks at the watch on his wrist. He straightens up and arches an eyebrow towards me slightly.

Victor: Do you still want to continue? 

MC: Of course we’ll continue...

My words lack confidence, but I’m someone whose resolve will not die until I reach my goal...

Victor: Don’t waste time. Let’s set new rules. The one who gets the black ball in first wins. 

Victor lets MC go first, but she starts feeling nervous

Victor: Want to admit defeat? 

MC: Not at all...

After a pause, I say what’s in my heart.

MC: I can’t win against you.

Suddenly, a familiar scent surrounds me. 

Victor leans over, pressing himself against my back, holding my cue stick with both hands. 

The cue stick controlled by Victor strikes the white ball cleanly. After a crisp sound of impact, the black ball rolls straight into the middle bag. 

Victor: Congratulations, your proposal has passed. 

Victor’s low voice is at my ear, tinged with a smile. 

Not knowing if I should be happy or not, I mutter softly.

MC: This can hardly be called winning...

Victor: I didn’t say that you won. I already passed your proposal last night. You didn’t check your e-mail after work.

Victor’s breath descends on the side of my neck, bringing with it a ticklish residual heat and water vapour. His embrace limits my movements, and my line of sight is confined to the frizz on the billiard table. 

MC: ...

Victor: This round of creativity is indeed very risky. If you lose against the market-

MC: I will win!

Without waiting for him to finish, I cut him off. 

MC: If it fails, I’ll double this year’s revenue!

I express my attitude decisively. Victor suddenly lowers his head and leans even closer. 

The sudden closing of distance magnifies every small detail between us. I can smell his cool and clear scent, and hear every one of his steady breaths. 

Victor: I’ll wait and see. 

Victor’s body temperature seeps through his thin shirt, covering my slightly trembling back. 

Flustered, I try to turn around. Just as I turn my head, my cheek is pressed against his chin. 

At this moment, the doors are suddenly flung open. Mr Sheng and a group of others are chatting heartily and about to enter the room. Seeing Victor and I, they pause. 

Realising in shock that the position Victor and I are in appears too intimate, I hurriedly squirm out from under his arm, and stand at a corner silently. 

On the other hand, Victor calmly straightens up, looking straight at the audience.

Mr Sheng gives me a knowing smile. There’s even a bit of unexpected fondness in his eyes...

Mr Sheng: CEO Victor, I was going to introduce you to two friends who just returned from Wall Street.

Victor retrieves his business card from his pocket, and a small hairpin falls onto the ground. 

It’s a red hairpin with a small bowknot on it. There are even two coloured diamonds embedded on the bowknot...

Everyone’s attention is focused on the hairpin. 

At that moment, a sentence flashes across my mind: I’m doomed.

With a blank expression, he stoops down to pick up the hairpin, and looks at me without a trace of surprise. 

Victor: When did you put this into my pocket? 

Sensing the playful glances from the crowd of onlookers, my cheeks flush involuntarily. 

MC: I... don’t remember the specific moment, but I did it when you weren’t paying attention...

Victor knits his eyebrows, revealing a perplexed expression. 

Victor: Another gift for me? 

MC: Yes. 

After speaking, I have a “since I’m going to die, I might as well make it worth it” attitude, and continue.

MC: You can use this hairpin to clip up your bangs. I think it’s quite practical when used during work...

Even though I’m certain that I’m speaking in a volume only Victor and I can hear, everybody’s teasing smiles make me feel uneasy...

Victor has maintained the reputation of a thousand-year iceberg for so long. I’m afraid it has been ruined by my hands on this night. 

Victor: What nonsense are you thinking about the entire day...

While saying this, Victor puts the small hairpin back into his pocket. 

Victor’s reputation is still a formidable one. Even if Victor doesn’t explain himself, the gossip of the onlookers end as soon as he takes out his business card. 

All the way till the end of dinner, I obediently maintain a smile, not daring to mention the hairpin to Victor. 

On our way home, after much rumination, I decide to give Victor a solemn apology. Before the apology leaves my lips, Victor brings up the topic. 

Victor: I accept your goodwill entirely. Could you stop giving me gifts now? 

I nod reluctantly, but still struggle with my apology. 

MC: I’m sorry about what happened today...

Victor: What are you sorry for? 

MC: For making a fool out of you in front of so many people.

Victor: No one will think that way.

Victor adjusts the cuffs of his suit with a calm expression on his face. 

It’s as though what happened just now was really not enough to pose an issue to him.

~

After a few days, MC appears before Victor with a exquisitely wrapped present

👀

It’s a 32 page business report...

It contains data from the company’s monthly financial reports, business index data, word-of-mouth surveys from large-scale programs, market share, etc. ever since LFG started funding MC’s company

MC: All the data reflects that our company has had good business this year. We not only filled in the losses, but our profit margin was also 50% higher than expected. 

Victor: So? 

MC: It shows that you have a good eye, and have once again made a successful investment!

I expected him to simply cast a sweeping glance at it. Instead, he starts flipping through the report seriously after hearing my words. 

Every rustle of the paper flipping makes my heart rattle.

I start feeling nervous for no reason, worried that he would be as he usually is, picking out all sorts of mistakes from the report, and fiercely criticising me. 

After some time, he finally closes the report. 

Victor: Not bad. 

MC: ...

MC: !!!

Victor: What kind of an expression is that?

MC: I’m happy! Only a few gifts I gave you received praise...

Victor pulls open a drawer. While he places the report inside, he takes out a few items at the same time and puts them on the desk. 

A salon card, a red hairpin, essential oil for sleep...

Victor: You want me to compliment these things?

I huff, feeling a little guilty. 

MC: I... shall return to my office then? 

Victor looks as though he’s about to say something, but his phone rings. I stand up quietly, silently gesturing an “I’m leaving” with my hands.

Victor: Wait. 

Right after taking two steps, Victor stops me. 

Victor: I’ll pick you up at 6pm.

I turn around to see him covering the bottom half of the phone. I hurriedly nod, and suddenly think of something. 

MC: Have you started using the puppy apron? 

Victor tosses me a glance. After a few seconds of silence, he continues with his phone call. 

Fine...

I’ll record this as an addition to the “Victor Not Saying What He Truly Feels” series.

-

Phone Calls: First // Second

[childofsquidward]

Rules: Answer 30 questions and tag 20 blogs you are contractually obligated to get to know better.

Tagged By: @pietrothepoltergeist (YOU TAGGED ME SO LONG AGO I’M PRETTY SURE YOU CHANGED YOUR URL AT LEAST 5 TIMES SINCE)

Name: Diya

Star Sign: Sagittarius 

Height: 5ft

Time: 4:32 AM

Birthday: December 19th

Favourite Bands/Favourite Solo Artists: I feel like I genuinely don’t have a favourite, I listen to pretty much anything I think sounds good so... I have no taste is what I’m saying. However, the current mood Taylor Swift cuz’ ya’ know, FALL.

Last Movie: My best-friend and I met up to Shang-Chi last month.

Last Show: One of the twenty billion tellywood shows that I watch (I’m very excited to catch up this week!).

When did I create this blog: fuck if I know

What I post: fuck if I know

Last thing I googled: "writing sample for grad school would it be a full paper” - L O L 

That’s actually not the last thing I googled, it’s what I had in my drafts, I just wanted to put it out there for funsies. Here’s what I actually googled last:

“what is difference between apercevoir and s'apercevoir” - 14 years of french and I still could not answer this question without googling it...

Other Blogs: LMAOOOOOOO, y’all think I’m as cool and organized as the people that I follow???

Do I Get Asks?: Sometimes, and I love them!

Why I chose my url: oh, it’s such a stupid reason - I basically was just vibin with Squidward when I created my Tumblr account so... yeah

Following: 414

Followers: 341

Average hours of sleep: 0 (no for real, I haven’t slept since last Monday, because I know for a fact that there is shit all over my bed that I just have not moved)

Instruments: I own a guitar and a piano and I’m trying to learn, but my brother is musically gifted one, not me. I did also play flute for two years back in middle school and when I was little my mom put me in singing classes and I was in choir, but that’s for my musical journey.

What am I wearing: I am wearing a pink and white striped top, dark purple pants and my ugly old flip-flops.

Dream job(s): y’all my dumb ass has been wanting to work with the UN since I was 10, I talk about this all the time

Dream trip: Okay, so fun fact, if not for COVID then I would’ve been at Malaga University for an exchange program this year and I’m lowkey still sad that I’m not but it’s fine, I just graduated earlier than I thought I would.

Favourite Food: I eat most things, I do not have a favourite food, but I’ve been craving chaat papri and also aloo deem dom cuz’ ya know, carbs.

Nationality: Bengali

Favourite Song(s): I’m so indecisive, I could never have a favourite song, but I think Boyfriend by Walk The Moon might’ve been my most played song this year.

Last book I read: I’m currently reading Into The Crooked Place by Alexandra Christo and it’s very good! I didn’t realize who the author was when I started reading it, but within the first chapter alone I was like ‘now wait a damn minute, why is this book so entertaining’ and then I realized it’s written by Alexandra Christo of To Kill A Kingdom fame, which is my favourite book, it’s up there with Six of Crows for me.

Top 3 fictional universes I'd like to live in: The Good Place and only The Good Place, no other fictional universe appeals to me because as interesting as the S&B/SoC-verse seems, it’ll definitely stress me out so I would prefer The Good Place because that would just mean I’m dead... right?

Tagging: @m0hinii @shaonharryandpannisim @lightninginmyeyes @thatkillervibe @maniq1 @writeturnlove @crelliefan4life @akenomenzies @temmie-loony @darwinquark 

Yeah, I tagged 10 people, that’s actually kind of impressive for me ngl. Also tagging anyone who sees this post and wants to do it.

[hashtag-anthems]

I got tagged by @nahyutas-eyeliner so thanks so much! :D

5 fandoms I used to be in:

Harry Potter (I used to really love it but then JKR ended up being Like That and I'm not about that :/)

Percy Jackson and the Olympians (I still like it, I just haven't kept up with it)

Homestuck (I know it's a day late to say this but like... don't shame me)

Voltron (shame me I deserve it)

Pokémon (honestly I still like it, but I'm nowhere near as active in fandom anymore as I used to be, and I'm kind of disappointed in how the franchise has been prioritizing graphics over story ever since the switch to 3D)

5 fandoms I am currently in:

Ace Attorney (currently hyperfixating on this)

Bravely (I need to finish BDII but honestly when am I not thinking about this game series lol)

Persona 5/P5R (I need to get Strikers but I'm not buying any new games until I'm done with this semester)

Fire Emblem: Three Houses (still need to finish GD and CF tho...)

sk8 (my friends dragged me into it so this is more fandom by association than something I actively got into myself)

5 movies I used to watch a lot:

Lilo & Stitch (BIG favorite)

Cars 2 (I used to watch this at least once a week and I could recite the opening scene from memory)

Barbie Fairytopia (or Barbie movies in general but the Fairytopia movies were my favorites)

I used to watch Shrek 2 on DVD on every single long car trip because I had a portable DVD player that was kind of broken and Shrek 2 was the only movie I had that would still work.

Against my will, I've seen The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian like ten times despite never having watched another movie or read a single book in that series. I did play the White Witch in my high school drama production of The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe though. My mom's oldest goddaughter was really into that series.

5 movies that I watch a lot:

Clue (1985) is legit my favorite movie I watch it all the time

I've watched Oceans 8 more times than is probably healthy bc Cate Blanchett and Anne Hathaway were part of my gay awakening

I really liked The Greatest Showman when it came out and I'll put it on in the background while I work because I like the music

I haven't watched it super recently but despite not really liking the MCU post-AoU, I will watch Black Panther if given the slightest opportunity

I watch Prince of Egypt pretty often and I wanted to watch it during Passover but grad school got busy O.o

5 book series I used to read a lot:

The Princess Diaries (I read all but the last book bc my library didn't have it v_v) and honestly anything by Meg Cabot that I could get my hands on

The Disney Fairies books (I hecking loved those books okay they were great the movies did not do them justice)

Percy Jackson and the Olympians/The Heroes of Olympus (loved these books, kind of want to reread them)

The Gaslight Mysteries series by Victoria Thompson (I'll be honest these were NOT age appropriate for when I read them I was like eight but my grandma read them and liked them and would let me read them after she'd finished them and we would have fun talking about who I thought had committed the crime or whatever)

The Nancy Drew books (I never managed a full collection, but I do have a first edition of The Spider Sapphire Mystery that I got for $2 at an antique store once) I used to buy one every time I went to visit my stepdad's family because they had two Barnes & Noble stores and we would always stop by one and I would save up for this monthly trip so I could buy another Nancy Drew book and then when I finished it, my grandpa would read it.

5 book series I read now:

Does it count as a series if there are only two books? The last novels I read were The Handmaid's Tale and The Testaments by Margaret Atwood.

Trying to get my hands on the rest of the Persona 5 manga, I have the first two volumes and I want to collect the rest.

I will reread the Uglies books by Scott Westerfeld a million times those are amazing books I love them.

I got back into Fruits Basket because the sequel series came out and I picked up the first volume on a whim. I should finish that.

god I need to read more books that aren't for school um... I've actually been meaning to reread The Hunger Games now that I'm older because I last read those books in middle school and I feel like I missed a lot.

Tagging Time!

Gonna tag my mutuals @anonymous-ivplay @allyblogsaboutaa (or whatever other blog you want to use this is just the url I remember lol) @friendraichu @iqnatzvictor and @dimension-0

If you want to do this, feel free to say I tagged you, even if we aren't mutuals! I limited myself to 5 people but there are so many more I'd love to tag.

[peachyhan]

All About Me Tag💫

Thanks for tagging me darling🥺 @urirealvibekiller

name- nalida :)

nicknames- um, i don’t really have any. my grandma calls me lida, and my friends call me multiple names that include (but are not limited to): nalido, egglida, manlida, thotlida, dumblida. all as jokes though! none of them have ever stuck, so ig the only nickname i have is lida💀

zodiac- taurus sun, virgo moon, and leo rising :) (i don’t really know what this says about me, but if anyone does, please tell me i’m really curious-)

height: i’m exactly 5′0, and according to my doctor, i might only grow like one or two inches but that’s it😭

languages- english, basic spanish, and basic french (i’ve been taking french for 3 years now, but i literally don’t remember anything but the basics😭)

nationality- laos :)

favorite season- either spring (because seeing the flowers bloom and leaves growing on trees is really pretty) or fall (i was gonna say some cute shit like “because the leaves changing colors is gorgeous” but my mind immediately went “SpOoKy😱 SpOoKy😱 SkElEtOn💀”)

favorite flower- hm, i haven’t really given this much thought before, if i’m being honest. but i just looked up “types of flowers” and i really like orchids, forget me nots, cherry blossoms, hibiscuses, and magnolias

favorite scent- books, candles, bleach (ik, it’s unusual-), cookies, literally any food, and the smell of jolly ranchers (if that even makes sense-)

favorite color- red, black, white, blue, purple, and a bunch of pastels like sky blue, light pink, and lilac. but i mostly wear dark clothing (changbin vibes-)

favorite animals: PENGUINS!!! and platypus(es??) they’re cute :))

coffee, tea, or hot chocolate?- definitely hot chocolate, but i wouldn’t mind drinking tea. just not coffee, not because it tastes bad or anything, it’s just that it makes me feel really sleepy instead of waking me up

average amount of sleep- it all just depends on the day tbh, because sometimes i’ll be asleep by 9 (but this is very rare), or other nights i don’t fall asleep until like 3 am (this happens more often-)

dogs or cats- i like both really, they’re both just so precious🥺

dream trips- my friend and i plan on travelling the world together after we finish school, and so far we plan on going to jamaica, thailand, and south korea, but i’d also like to go laos, england, australia, hawaii, and greece (athens specifically)

number of blankets- just one, but i can never sleep without a blanket. like, it could be the middle of summer and my house could have no ac, and i’d still sleep with a blanket on

blog est- i think i’ve had this blog since june? but i haven’t actually written anything until like two weeks ago, im pretty sure

random fact- my mbti type is infp💫

Tagging: @cotccotc @sunhwa0403 @hanniiesuckle17 and whoever else wants to do this!!🥺💓

[yespleasetommyshelby]

You’re an idiot - Adam Ruzek imagine

“Good job today, go home.” Voight instructed as he walked through the bullpen after the longest case we’d had in a while. Two ten year old girls had been abducted from their school playground by some guy looking to sell them into a pedophile ring, it was a close one but we got him.

“Hey y/n, we’re all heading over to Molly’s, you coming?” Erin asks as her and Jay start heading towards the stairs.

“I’m sure Adam would like to see you there.” Jay joked recieveing an elbow I’m the ribs from his partner.

“Ha, ha Jay, you’re so funny you know, you’re really wasted in intelligence.” I laughed sarcastically as I narrowed my eyes at him trying to ignore the small blush that was appearing on my cheeks. “I’ll meet you guys there, I just gotta finish this last little bit.” I told them as I motioned to the lone piece of paper sitting on my desk.

“Don’t leave me with all the testosterone, I’m begging you.” Erin jokingly begged before her and Jay left.

Sighing I finished off the page before my mind drifted to Adam. We had started the academy together and had been partners pretty much all the time before he had been pulled out to work in intelligence by Alvin. A couple of months after he left him and Al had came back and pulled me up to intelligence after Adam had recommended me for an undercover job.

I’d had some kind of feelings for him not long after we’d joined the academy, I assumed it was just some kind of crush, but once he had left he was all I could think about. I missed him like crazy and the second he walked back through the doors with Al all the feelings rushed back and I realised it was more than a simple crush, I was in love with Adam Ruzek.

I haven’t told him, or anyone really due to Voight’s no in-house dating rule and the fact that there’s a 0% chance that he’d reciprocate the feelings. Although Erin soon figured it out after noticing the way I look at him or something like that, and I think Jay suspects something is up since he keeps dropping ‘subtle’ hints in front of Adam. Jackass.

The slam of a door pulled me from my thoughts as Voight comes out of his office and stops infront of my desk. “Go home kid, you did good.” He gravely voice sounds as he smiles down at me.

“I’m going, I’m going.” I smile as I grab my jacket from the back of my chair and make my way out beside Voight. “So Sarge, the teams meeting up for a drink at Molly’s, you in?” I asked already knowing the answer, him only looking at me with a raised eyebrow. “You’ve got something to take care off.” I nodded to myself with a laugh. “You really need some new excuses boss.” I laughed as he shook his head.

“I’ll see you Monday y/n.” He laughed slightly as he walked over to Trudy at the front desk.

“Bye Sarge. Bye Trudy!” I called with a wave feeling privileged that I wasn’t forced to call her Sarge like everyone else, what can I say, I’m her favourite. Recieving a ‘bye’ from the both of them I made my way to my car, stopping off at home to freshen up before calling a cab to Molly’s.

—————

As I walked through the doors of Molly’s the familiar sound of loud music and the smell of alcohol hit me as I look around spotting the team gathered around a table towards the back.

“Hey, look who finally made it!” Kevin cheered as he was the first to notice me, causing the others to cheer aswell, guess they’ve had a few drinks without me.

“Yes, I have arrived, your night just got a whole lot better!” I grinned as I took a seat in the only chair available that just so happens to be in between Jay and Adam, Jay looked at me with a grin as I narrowed my eyes at him.

“How’s it going n/n?” Adam asked as he put his arm around the back of my chair like he always has done, even back in the academy.

“Hey Adam, I’m gunna go grab a drink, I’ll be right back.” I smiled at him as I stood up making his arm fall from the back of my chair. “Want anything?”

“I’m good, thanks though.” He replied holding up his still full beer bottle.

“What about me?” Jay whined just as I was about to walk away.

“Buy your own drink.” I laughed as he pouted and everyone laughed.

“Hey Otis, can I grab a beer when you’re ready?” I called as I sat on a stool at the bar recieving a nod from him as he dealt with another customer.

“What’s a pretty lady like you doing in a bar like this?” An unfamiliar voice said as they took a seat on the stool besides me. Looking over I was met with an attractive man maybe in his early thirties, but he was no Adam, I mentally rolled my eyes at how pathetic I was, pining over my best friend who has zero interest in me.

“Just having a drink after a stressful day.” I slightly smiled at him just as Otis brought my beer over giving the guy a side look before looking at me with an eyebrow raised, shaking my head I thanked him and looked back to the stranger.

“The names Jackson by the way.” He said as he held his hand out for me to shake.

“Y/n.” I smiled as I shook his hand.

“So, are you here alone?” He asked as he took a sip of his drink.

“Uh, no, I’m actually here with them.” I said motioning over to the group who had quietened down and were now watching us with, what looked like, unimpressed faces. I couldn’t help but to look over at Adam who was staring at Jackson with a look of rage plastered over his face, his hand holding his beer botttle so tight that his knuckles were turning white, weird.

“He your boyfriend or something?” Jackson asked obviously noticing Adams look aswell, although it was near impossible to miss.

“Uh, no he’s my partner at work.” I smiled at him to try and reassure him that Adam won’t be murdering him tonight, even if it looked like he wanted to. Picking up my beer I smiled at him and told him that I was gunna head back over to the group.

“Hold on a sec.” he said gently holding my arm and reaching into his pocket and pulling out a business card. “Just in case.” He smiled letting me go.

Jackson Barette - Private Tutor

Taking the card with a smile I walked away and took my previous seat between Adam and Jay as Jackson stood up and left the bar.

“Hey, anyone want his number? He’s a private tutor.” I laughed as I threw the card into the middle of the table, he was nice and all but like I said, he was no Adam.

“You’ve been single forever, should’ve given him a shot.” Jay said as he grinned at me, I raised my eyebrow knowing that there was going to be some kind of comment to come. “I mean, unless you’ve got your eye on someone else.” He smirked quickly looking at Adam and back at me, and there it is.

“Okay.” I started as I reached foreward and picked the card back up. “You should take this, I mean, don’t you have to be at least a little intelligent to work in intelligence?” I laughed handing him the card, watching while he ripped it up as the others broke out in laughter, except Adam.

“Hey, you okay?” I asked placing my hand on the arm that’s usually resting on the back of my chair by now, strange.

“Yeah I’m fine.” He said bluntly shaking my hand from his arm before standing up. “I’m going to the bar.” He muttered before he walked off.

“Okay? What’s his problem?” I asked out loud only recieving shrugs in reply.

—————

And that’s how the rest of the night went, Adam stayed at the bar flirting with girl after girl while the rest of us drank and laughed together. After I’d finished my, like, fifth beer? Maybe? I decided it was time to go.

“I’m gunna head home, I’ll see you guys Monday!” I announced standing up and grabbing my coat. After recieving a chorus of byes I made my way out into the cold, passing Adam and some blonde laughing way too loud on my way, after calling a cab I stopped and took a seat on the bench on the corner of the street.

After about five minutes of waiting the doors to Molly’s open and someone takes a seat next to me, I can tell it’s Adam just by his shoes. As we sit there in silence for a few seconds hurt and anger start to rise inside of me, which I’m blaming on the alcohol, rolling my eyes I just couldn’t help myself.

“What? No girls left to hit on?” I asked, bitchiness clear in my tone.

“What?” He asked sounding genuinely confused.

“Don’t play dumb Adam, you’ve spent the entire night with at least like three different girls.” I said rolling my eyes as I looked up at him.

“I wasn’t hitting on them.” He said as he looked into my eyes, I could see that he wasn’t lying, his eye twitched when he does, but in my slightly drunken state I refused to believe it.

“Sure.” I snorted, rather unattractively if I do say so myself.

“I’m serious y/n, I just wanted to make you mad.” He said quietly taking both my hands in his, face scrunched up in confusion I looked up at him and tried to tell what game he was trying to play right now. “When I saw you talking to that guy earlier I was so mad, and I didn’t even know why, you were doing nothing wrong, I mean you’re single so you can get with whoever, I mean if you wanted to-“

“Adam, what are you talking about?” I asked interrupting his ramblings.

“Right, uh, what I’m trying to say is,” he stopped to take a deep breathe looking up in the sky before he looked back into my eyes, determination taking over his features. “I like you y/n, like a lot I’d even go as far as to say that I love you y/n. I have done ever since the first day I saw you at the academy with your hair sticking up everywhere because you were runnning late.” He paused, both of us laughing at the memory. “When I saw you with that guy in there I just saw red, I didn’t want you to be sat there smiling at him when you should’ve been smiling at me. Look, what I’m trying to say is that I want you y/n, I want you to be mine and only mine, I don’t want to have to see you with someone who isn’t me ever again. Please, can we give it a try?” He finished looking at me with so much emotion that I probably would’ve said yes even if I wasn’t head over heels for the guy.

“You’re an idiot, Adam Ruzek.” I said only to have him look at me confused, shaking my head I continued. “I love you too stupid. There is nothing I want more than to be with you, how you haven’t realised that yet is beyond me, I mean, have you not gotten the hints that Jay’s been dropping for months?” I laughed slightly thinking back to how obvious he was.

“I just thought he was just being Jay.” He shrugged smiling down at out hands. “So what do ya say y/n l/n? Wanna give us a try?” He asked standing up and pulling me up with him.

“Adam Ruzek, I would be honoured.” I smiled as he let go of my hands placing his on my waist as mine went around his neck.

I couldn’t contain my smile as he leaned down and softly placed his lips on mine, moving in perfect sync, cheering in the background made us slowly pull away looking over to see the rest of the team cheering and whistling as they watched us.

“You guys are so weird! Go away!” I called laughing as they feigned hurt other than Jay who had a huge grin on his face.

“This was me! I did this!” He yelled as Erin shook her head and pushed him back towards the doors.

“Well, this is my cab.” I laughed as the yellow car pulled up a few feet away.

“I’ve never been so glad that the cab system in Chicago is so slow.” Adam grinned as he pulled me close once more.

“I’ll see you soon.” I smiled as he bent down and kissed me softly once more.

“Tomorrow, I’m taking you out, just us.” He told me as he opened the cab door for me.

“I’ll see you tomorrow then.” I grinned.

Reaching up to press my lips on his I enjoyed the feeling for a few seconds before slowly pulling back and climbing into the cab. As we pulled away I couldn’t get rid of the smile on my face, after all this time, he was mine. All we had to deal with now was Voight.

Feel free to send me any imagines you might have, I write for;

Chicago PD

Chicago Fire

SWAT

Walking dead

Law and order : SVU

[artificialqueens]

Galactica, Chapter 25 (Group Fic) - TheDane/Veronica

A/N: Hey kiddos! As always, thank you so much for any feedback. You’re the best. Click here if you’re looking for previous chapters (or here if you’d rather read on AO3). 💫

Last Chapter: Long-distance brought challenges to many of our couples.  

This Chapter: In Milan, Trixie agonizes over being apart from Katya. But back home in New York, she’s finding support in Violet’s friendship — at least until Miss Fame throws a wrench in their plans. Elsewhere, Willam continues to work his charms, Adore gets an invitation she can’t refuse and Alaska learns some upsetting news.

***

“Guess who just got an extra round of shots because the bartender thought he had a chance? Me! 1 - 0 for the lesbian.” Pearl laughed as she dumped down next to Trixie, handing her friend a beer as she balanced her tray of free shots in her other hand.

“I love Italians. They’ll literally give you anything you want as long as you’ve got a pair of tits and a smile.”

Trixie looked at Pearl before he sighed and accepted the beer, his phone in his hand. He had been trying to call Katya all day, but no matter what he did, he couldn’t get a hold of her beyond a few quick texts. He was just about to dial her number again when he felt a poke in his stomach.

“Ouch! Pearl, what the fuck?”

“Stop looking so sad! It’s contagious and you’re not allowed to be sad during Fashion Week, so how about you turn that frown upside down, we slam these and I’ll score us some free hotdogs on the way home!”

Pearl smiled, her entire face lit up as her eyebrows wiggled, her good mood making Trixie feel a little better.

“I don’t think they have hotdogs in Milan, Pearlie Girl.”

“Well, then pizza! Gelato! Whatever! Now put that phone away and take a shot with me like a man!”

Pearl was just about to grab the phone from Trixie’s hand, but he stopped her, a serious expression on his face.

“Katya hasn’t responded to any of my calls.”

“Well, if you’re so worried, just ask Violet? She’s such a control freak she probably has a written record of Katya’s last three meals and her sleep schedule.” Pearl leaned back in her chair, taking a long swig from her wine, people all around them moving back and forth, coming and going, but to Pearl they didn’t matter.

All that mattered was that Trixie wasn’t going to party with her, and that wasn’t fair.

“Why are you always so mean to her, Pearlie?”

“I’m not mean, I’m perfectly reasonable.”

“If you say so.” Trixie sighed and crossed his arms, finally taking his first swig of the beer Pearl had gotten for him.

“Katya and I have never gone this long without talking. I haven’t heard from her in almost 24 hours.”

“Bro, let it go.” Pearl sighed, pulling a bit of her hair over her shoulder. “Katya is probably fine; you worry too much.”

“Tell that to my stomach.”

Pearl leaned over, a mischievous smile on her face before she placed both hands on Trixie’s tummy, talking to it as if he was a pregnant woman as she adopted a high-pitched baby voice.

“Hey sweetie, I know you’re confused right now, but don’t worry, you don’t have to worry about your mommy one bit, Auntie Pearl is right here ready to take care of you, and I know exactly what you need, which, is, shoooooots!”

Pearl sat up again, laughing hard when she saw the unhappy scowl on Trixie’s face.

“You’re the worst, Pearl, you know that, right?”

“The absolute worst.”

***

Trixie was in his hotel room, silently cursing Pearl as the blonde was off getting laid, the European chicks absolutely loving her.  Trixie however really needed a bro since he couldn’t get out of his clothes, too drunk for his hands to work properly, even if he had fought his way out of his shirt.

Fashion Week was like an endless party, and he couldn’t remember the last time he hadn’t been at least mildly buzzed or had gotten more than six hours of sleep.

Trixie was battling with getting out of his shoes, his pants already around his ankles as he heard his phone ring and he jumped for it right away, falling onto the bed and swiping right to pick up the call.

“Please be Katya, please be Katya, please be Katya!”

Trixie hadn’t realized he had said any of it out loud, until he heard Katya’s laugh on the other end of the phone, almost making him cry.

“Katya, oh God, it’s really you, I love you so much, please I want to grow old with you and get weird and wrinkly.”

“Are you drunk, baby?”

“Maybe a little.” Trixie looked down at himself: there were stains of pizza sauce on his stomach, and his pants were still around his legs, making it hard for him to move. “But none of that matters because now I’m talking to you! I miss you sooooooo much!”

“I miss you too, I’m sorry I haven’t called…”

“How are you? Are your students okay? How are you, how are you, how are you?”

Trixie was excitedly waiting for Katya’s reply, ready to hear all about how the most important person in his life was doing, but then there was nothing on the other end and Trixie had to check if his phone was actually on.

“Katya? Are you okay? Like… For reals?”

“I...I really fucked up last night,” Katya said, voice small and soft.

“What do you mean?” Trixie asked. “Are you okay?”

“I just...I really wanted a drink, and I thought Pearl might have something, and so I went into her room and I basically tore everything apart looking for a bottle-”

Trixie froze, his heart stopping at Katya’s words.

“I’m coming home right now.”

Trixie was already standing up, fighting with his pants, trying to get them on and then instead stepping out of them, grabbing his backpack, not caring that he was only wearing his underpants and his socks.

“No! Trix! Trix! Please wait.”

“No! I can’t wait! I have to come home!”

“Trixie, please, baby, listen! I didn’t find anything, okay? And like, after a couple of minutes, I was standing in the middle of this fucking mess, holding Pearl’s Hitachi in my hand, digging through her bottom drawer, and I realized how crazy I must have looked.” She let out a dry chuckle.

“That’s not funny.”

“It’s a little funny. And anyway, I’m okay. I saw Sasha after school today, and then I came home and cleaned everything up. I’m sorry for making you worry...”

Trixie stopped, listening to Katya’s words. “You’re okay?”

“I’m okay… I promise. I talked to Violet, and we’re gonna have a slumber party this week, so don’t worry. You don’t have to come home, everything is fine.��

Trixie fell back into bed, the sudden burst of energy only making him more nauseous, the entire room spinning.

“What did Sasha say?” Trixie liked Katya’s therapist. She was calm and warm and extremely perceptive, with a lovely sense of humor. If she thought Katya was okay, then he’d feel a hell of a lot better.

“She thinks that I’m being too hard on myself, and that I just need to try and relax. Which is what I’m doing now. I’m in the bathtub.”

“So...then you’re really okay?” asked Trixie.

“I’m really okay.”

“And you’ll tell me if you’re not?”

“I’ll tell you if I’m not,” Katya echoed.

“Promise?” Trixie asked, sniffling.

“I promise. I love you, baby.”

“I love you too. So, so much.”

***

“So...you gonna tell me why you’ve been pouting all night?” Bianca asked, reaching across the table to stab a penne off Adore’s plate.

“I am not!” Adore said, mouth turning down even more as she screwed up her face.

“Are too,” Bianca said, imitating her childish tone. “What gives?”

Adore scoffed, pushing the pasta around on her plate, making trails of vodka sauce.

“Well…”

“Out with it! Time is money!” Bianca barked.

“Oh sorry, do you have another appointment after this?” Adore asked, taking a big swig of her wine.

“As a matter of fact…” Bianca grinned wickedly, dimples deep in her cheeks.

“That Derrick girl again?”

“No, that’s over,” Bianca said, taking a bite of her salad. “But I met someone at the Michael Kors show, and she’s coming over later.”

The girl from the MK show was a stunning model who she’d previously featured in a couple of editorials for the magazine. A very resourceful young lady, who’d been all too happy to express her gratitude in the back of Bianca’s limo after the reception. But Adore didn’t need those details.

“Ugh, great. I can’t even get a call back, and my big sister’s having late night booty calls.”

“Don’t beat yourself up, kiddo. I’ve been having late night booty calls since you were in diapers.”

Adore heaved a big, put-upon sigh.

“So...who’s not calling you back?” Bianca asked.

“No one…”

“Uh-huh.” Bianca took a sip of wine. White, so as not to stain her mouth before the aforementioned booty call. “Anyone I know?”

“Maybe.” Adore stuffed a piece of garlic bread into her mouth.

“Are you not telling me because you know I’ll disapprove?”

“...maybe.”

Bianca rolled her eyes. "Why can't you date someone who's not an asshole?"

“She’s not an asshole. At least, I don’t think she is. She’s just busy. She’s in Milan this week, I think.”

“Eww,” Bianca’s face scrunched up in disgust.  “She works in fashion?”

“You work in fashion.”

“Exactly! That’s how I know,” Bianca said.

“Whatever,” Adore said, face still a stormcloud.

“Listen...why don’t you come with me to Paris next week? It’ll be fun, and you can meet a sexy French girl to help you forget about whatever bitch is treating you like shit.”

“Are you serious?” Adore asked.

“Yeah, why not? I mean, when you’re not whining, you’re pretty decent company.”

“Awww, thanks, B!” Adore scrambled over to Bianca’s side of the booth and threw her arms around her neck. “We’re flying first, right? With lie-flat seats?”

“Is there any other way to fly?” Bianca replied with a wink.

“I love you, you bougie cunt,” Adore giggled.

“Shut up and eat your dinner, punk.”

***

“Hey Jinkx?”

“Mmh?”

Alaska smiled at the redhead in front of her. Alaska and Jinkx were in Alaska’s office, the remains of their lunch in a trashcan, two cups of tea on her desk as the two friends sat in Alaska’s plush chairs, the computer playing one of Lily Allen’s first albums.

“Why did the blonde put lipstick on her forehead?”

“Why?” Jinkx cracked an eye open. Alaska was slowly working on filling in the other woman’s eyebrows. Jinkx had texted Alaska that morning, asking her friend if she would help her with her makeup for a theater reception she was going to later that day.

“She was trying to make, up, her mind.”

“Oh my God!”

Alaska wheezed as tears gathered in her eyes at the look of absolute outrage on Jinkx’s face. Jinkx’s anger was always the funniest thing and a true testament to her skills as a pun master, which was why Alaska continued to tease her red-haired friend.

Alaska picked up her brushes again and began to work on  Jinkx’s eyes, slowly covering her lids with shades of gold to compliment her warm brown eyes before moving on to liner.

Alaska had always found Jinkx beautiful: she loved the small gap in Jinkx’s front teeth, loved her soft red curls and round cheeks, loved the cute little cleft in Jinkx’s chin that she knew the other woman was incredibly self-conscious about.

Alaska ran a hand down Jinkx’s face, gently caressing the other’s cheek as she waited for the lash glue to get tacky, enjoying how doing the other’s makeup gave her an excuse to touch her. There was a comfortable silence while she worked, touching her up here and there before finally fixing her lashes on. Finally, Alaska drew back, satisfied with the final look.  

“There,” she said. “Absolutely stunning, don’t you think?”

Jinkx opened her eyes and looked in the mirror she was holding up. When her face broke into a bright smile, Alaska couldn’t help but feel warm all over.

“I look amazing! You’re a genius, Lasky.”

“Don’t mention it!”

“No, do mention it.” Jinkx grabbed Alaska’s hand which made a jolt go through the blonde’s body, Jinkx looking Alaska straight in the eyes.

“You’re a true artist, a great artist.”

Alaska was just about to open her mouth, just about to say what was on her mind, when the door to her office opened, Jinkx released her hand and Alaska felt her heart drop.

“Hey Alaska, are you in here? Kim didn’t know if you were back from your lunch.”

Alaska looked up to see Ivy peeking in through the door, a big stack of boxes in her hand.

“Oh!” Ivy looked back and forth between the two women, an apologetic smile on her face as soon as she realized she had walked in on something. “I’m sorry, sorry! I didn’t mean to interrupt anything. I’ll just leave these with Kim and call you later!” Ivy flashed one last bright smile before she closed the door behind her.

“Jinkx… There’s something I have to… Jinkx, are you listening to me?”

Jinkx was still looking at the door where Ivy had just left, her face flushed as she was practically staring.

“That… That was her, that was her, the girl I’ve been telling you about, that was the angel from Fashion Week who waved at me! You have to tell me her name!”

Alaska felt her stomach drop all the way to the floor. Fuck.

***

ADORE: Hey

ADORE: Hope ur having fun in Milano.

ADORE: So, I’m gonna be in Paris next week with my sister. Maybe we can chill

ADORE: Or, you know, whatever

PEARL: Sounds cool ;)

Adore clutched the phone to her chest, curled in bed, nearly giddy with happiness. She didn’t care that Pearl was playing a bit hard to get. All she cared about was that they were about to be together for a week in the most romantic city in the world.

***

“Cheers,” Courtney said, holding up her glass with a grin.

“Cheers…” Willam clinked his glass with hers. They were sitting together in a cozy booth for a rare mid-week date. Apparently, with Miss Fame in Europe, Courtney was expected to be at the office before dawn, but the upside was that she got to leave a little early in the evenings.

Willam certainly wasn’t complaining. Playing the doting boyfriend via text was tough--he was constantly second-guessing himself and could never tell how she was responding. He felt better in person, where he could see Courtney’s physical reactions to the things he said. Really putting those improv classes in college to excellent use.

The good news was, he was pretty damn sure that he had her, hook line and sinker. The way her eyes glittered in the candlelight, the way she slid closer to him, tilting her chin up…

Shit.

Willam knew that when he came up with this plan, that he’d eventually have to touch a girl. But he was really trying to postpone it as much as possible.

“Hey!” he exclaimed, making Courtney jump slightly. “I just got a great idea!”

“What?” Courtney asked, head tilted coyly.

“I have this friend from college, Sam, who runs an open mic night in the village. We should go. You should sing something!”

“I’m...how did you know I sing?” Courtney asked.

“Uh, I heard you last Saturday, singing along at the concert. You have an amazing voice,” Willam said. He flashed a big smile at her for good measure.

“Oh,” Courtney said, looking up at him with starry eyes. “Really?”

God, she was so easy. Her dream of being a recording artist was just about the most obvious thing in the world for anyone with her FaceBook profile. He’d barely needed to research at all to figure that one out.

“Absolutely,” Willam said. “I think you’re a star.”

Courtney took a long sip of her wine, deep in thought.

“You know, the truth is…” Courtney paused, biting her lip. “Ummm…”

“What? You can tell me,” Willam assured her, taking one her her hands in his. The sad reality was that in order to have any chance at something juicy about Galactica, he had to listen to a lot of crap. Because Courtney loved to talk, maybe more than anyone he’d ever met.

“Well, when I first got to New York, I had this idea that I was gonna get a part in a Broadway show, or...or some other job as a singer. I went on all these open calls. Every single one I could. Broadway, music videos, back-up singers, anything. But…”

“Yeah? What happened?”

Courtney deflated, her eyes cloudy with tears as she shook her head.

“Nothing happened. I never got past the first rounds, never made it to the real auditions. One of the dance captains pulled me aside one day and said that if I wanted to be competitive, I needed way more dance lessons. So I’ve been trying to do that, but it’s really expensive and ever since I started at this Galactica job, it’s even harder to make it work with my schedule. And I mean, I still write music and I still want to be a singer or an actress someday but…”

“It’ll happen,” Willam said kindly, patting her on the shoulder. “You gotta believe in yourself.”

“I don’t know.” Courtney’s shoulders sagged, eyes big and sad as she gazed up at him, lip trembling. “I’ve never told anyone this, but sometimes...sometimes I worry that if I was really talented enough, something would already have happened. You know? Maybe...maybe I’m just not good enough. Maybe I’ll never be good enough.”

Willam cleared his throat. Shit, what the fuck was he supposed to say to all that?

“Listen,” he began. “You are destined for amazing things; I know it. You just gotta keep going, keep trying, and someday, everyone will see the greatness that I do. I swear it.”

“You really think so?”

“I know so,” Willam promised, watching her eyes tear up some more. “Now, come on. Let’s get over to that open mic and show them what a real superstar looks like.”

“You know...I’ve never dated anyone as supportive and kind as you…” Courtney said, twirling her wine glass.

Willam smiled again, trying to push down the guilty feeling creeping into his stomach. This would be a lot easier if she wasn’t so damn sweet.

“Well...you deserve it, babe.”

***

“Sit still.”

“I am-” Katya smiled, wiggling her fingers again, the nail polish wand hitting her skin.

“Katya!” Violet gasped. “Look at your hand-” Violet reached for a cotton ball, gently removing the polish, the cold liquid feeling nice.

“Sorry.” Katya smirked. She knew it wasn’t very kind of her, but it was impossible not to mess at least a little with Violet.

The two of them were sitting on her couch, both of them in pajamas, Katya’s hand resting on Violet’s knee as she was slowly and carefully painting her nails a deep red.

They had eaten dinner together, Violet letting Katya pick a movie without any fight at all, which Katya had found a little weird. Normally it took hours of negotiation to get anyone to watch ‘The Princess Bride’, but Violet had simply agreed right away, almost like she didn’t have an opinion on it.

“You’re not sorry at all-” Violet giggled, and Katya felt her heart warm at the sound.

“I’m not.” It felt a little wrong to tease Violet, but the other took obvious delight in it, so Katya didn’t feel too bad. She was grateful that Violet had agreed to this little sleepover, spending time with a friend so much better than being alone.

It wasn’t that Katya couldn’t be on her own, wasn’t that she was incapable of keeping her demons down, but it was easier with someone around, easier to focus on Violet and her smile, the other woman absolutely hilarious in her dry commentary and snarky sense of humor.

Katya didn’t like her apartment being empty, couldn’t find peace when there wasn’t the putter of others around her. It was part of the reason she had never kicked up a fuss about the fact that Pearl still lived with them. It made her feel calm when she could hear Pearl in the kitchen, when there was the clink of beers in the living room when her and Trixie played games together, even Pearl’s parade of girls had their own strange comfort.

Usually, with the Galactica team in Europe, she’d have relied more on Kim and Shangela. But with Kim working on a commercial for the new makeup line and Shangie distracted by the honeymoon bliss of a new relationship, she really would have been alone had it not been for Violet.

“Maybe you should choose the next movie,” Katya offered. “What do you want to watch? What’s your favorite?”

“Let’s just watch whatever you want,” Violet smiled, “I don’t mind.”

Katya leaned against Violet’s shoulder. She was a strange little bird, indeed. But Katya was infinitely happy to have found her.

***

“Hello?”

Violet tried to not croak, her voice heavy with sleep. She had no idea what time it was. She was sleeping in Katya’s bed with the blonde’s head resting on her shoulder. When she attempted to make her exit last night, Katya had looked like a kicked puppy, so she decided to stay in spite of it being a work night.

“Violet?!”

Violet sat up, Katya making a surprised noise as she was unceremoniously dumped down on the bed.

“Miss? Is everything alright?” Violet was completely awake, adrenaline coursing through her blood.

“The breakfast at this hotel is absolutely horrid. They gave me what is clearly a kale juice when I specifically requested spinach.”

“I’m sorry Miss,” Violet swallowed, Fame sounding genuinely upset. “I’ll call the concierge immediately, do you want me to-”

“I don’t want you to call anyone.”

“Oh? Umh, should I email-”

“No. I want you to pack your things-”

Violet froze, wondering for a moment if Fame was going to fire her over a mistake a chef in Italy had made.

“Book yourself a flight, and meet me in Paris.”

“Paris-  How?”

“Figure it out.”

Violet couldn’t believe what she had just heard, but before she could even finish her sentence, Fame had hung up, the phone beeping in her ear.

“Shit.” Violet looked down, Katya lying next to her, the blonde wide awake.

“Katya?” Violet reached out, gently touching Katya’s hair.

“Mmh?”

Violet could see that Katya was trying to be brave, what little she could see in the shadows of night painted with worry.

“Are you okay?”

“Fine. Fine. I’m totally fine. Super fine.”

“Katya-” Violet wasn’t the most emotionally observant person, but Katya was clearly winding herself up, almost like she was afraid to lose it, and that was when she had an idea. “How difficult would it be for you to take a few days off?” Violet ran her hand through Katya’s hair.

“I could work something out, make sub plans-” Katya bit her lip. “Why?”

“Do you happen to speak French?”

[sophieakatz]

Thursday Thoughts: Cute Asks

I’m in a funk today, so this week’s Thursday Thoughts is responses to questions from this ask post.

1: When you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk?

I’ve been eating cereal dry for a while now, so, much more cereal than milk, because there is no milk.

2: Do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day?

Nope! I have loved wearing this facemask all winter!

5: Are you self-conscious of your smile?

Nah. I used to be, but I grew out of it. I have a darn cute smile.

8: What artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?

Hi, my name is Sophie, and I’m a writer!

9: Do you like singing/humming to yourself?

Incessantly!

10: Do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach?

I usually fall asleep on my left side, but I often wake up on my stomach.

11: What’s an inner joke you have with your friends?

You know that bit in Phantom of the Opera, during “Down Once More,” where the Phantom says, “Down a path into darkness deep as HEEEEEEEELL!”

If I’m chatting with two of my best friends, and I say something thoughtful/philosophical (again, hi, my name is Sophie, and I’m a writer), they’ll sing that line at me. “Deep as HEEEEEEEELL!”

12: What’s your favorite planet?

Earth. It’s the only one with chocolate.

13: What’s something that made you smile today?

The weather got cold again today and so there were lots of little kids at work in teddy bear onesies.

15: Go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is!

One million Earths could fit inside the Sun.

Of course we shouldn’t put one million Earths into the Sun, because then all the chocolate would melt.

16: What’s your favorite pasta dish?

Tuna noodle casserole. Tuna, macaroni, a heck of a lot of shredded cheese, and onion soup. Bake at 350 for 20-30 min. Mmmmmm.

19: Do you keep a journal? What do you write/draw/ in it?

I do. Since middle school, I’ve rarely gone without a notebook on me somewhere. I write everything in it - random thoughts, what happened that day, bits of stories or poems or things that will turn into stories or poems, random math problems when I need to multiply something... I also put stickers in it, because I want to keep them.

22: Are you a morning person?

Absolutely not.

23: What’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations?

A day with zero obligations? What’s that? If I had it, though, I would read a book!

24: Is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets?

Yes. My mom and dad. I trust them with everything.

30: Think of it: Have you ever been truly scared?

Yes. And someday, when everyone involved is far enough away from it, I might write about it.

32: Tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.

I don’t think it was quite to 3am yet, but it was very late at night, and I was at Steak n’ Shake with high school friends (some of whom were a year older and in college already; the high schoolers of us had gone to their campus to see one of them in a play), and I was very tired and had become very silly, and I remember one of my friends telling me, “Sophie, you will never need to get drunk.”

40: Think of a piece of jewelry you own: What’s it’s story? Does it have any meaning to you?

I have a little silver elephant necklace. It was a present from my mom. She bought it off of a friend of hers. That friend got a silver elephant necklace from her boyfriend, and then she went to the gym and lost the necklace, but she didn’t want to tell her boyfriend that she’d lost it, so she bought a new one that looked just like it, and then the people at the gym found the necklace and gave it back to her, so she fessed up to the boyfriend about getting a duplicate necklace, and my mom bought the necklace off of her and gave it to me, because I love elephants. I’ve been wearing it for years, and if I were allowed to wear jewelry at work, I would.

56: What are some things you find endearing in people?

If they get wholeheartedly enthusiastic about something they love. It doesn’t matter if I know anything about the thing. I just love watching and listening to people’s passion.

Also, if they remember things about me. I’m ridiculously bad at remembering things about real people (but story details are locked into my brain forever), so it means a lot to me when someone remembers something I said.

60: Do you like poetry? What are some of your faves?

“I’m nobody! Who are you?” by Emily Dickinson. Also “I have a bird in Spring” by Emily Dickinson. I really like Emily Dickinson.

65: Is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with?

Everyone... Thanks, COVID-19.

72: Are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it?

I don’t trust memory. I took too many psychology classes in undergrad to trust memory. It’s all a reconstruction of what we think must have happened. But if I write it down, then I remember!

73: What are some of your worst habits?

I pick at my skin on my fingers, my face, my shoulders, and my chest. And I stay up too late.

79: What’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?

For my birthday this year, my family filmed themselves singing parody versions of “Bella Notte,” “Baby Mine,” “Do You Want To Build A Snowman,” and “Part of Your World,” with lyrics about me and my life, with baby pictures of me interspersed throughout the video. They made me cry. It was great.

80: What color are your bedroom walls? Did you choose that color? If so, why?

They’re white, and no, I didn’t. It’s a rental.

87: What are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?

Hello have you heard of our lord and savior WALL-E?

89: Are you close to your parents?

I am! I’ve gotten closer to them as I’ve gotten older and come to understand them more. We fought a lot when I was little, ‘cause I was a stubborn brat, but they’ve had my back my whole life.

92: Are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch?

What is pasta if not a vehicle for cheese? A yummy, yummy vehicle...

100: If you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? Why?

I wouldn’t, unless I knew for sure that I could get back to the present again. I’d like to go five years into the past and give twenty-year-old Sophie a hug.

[pitiless-achilles-wept]

All I want for Christmas...is a working cancer treatment

Hello friends,

It's getting to be that time of the year again. No, not Christmas, although I'm reliably informed that it will indeed be happening again and soon (a thing I, who haven't bought or made a single gift yet, can't quite believe). It was this time last year that I first called my doctor about the mass in my breast that had become too large--and too tender and painful--to ignore any further. They didn't see me right away...because of the holidays and because for someone with my risk level (basically 0 - at age 34 with not a single person in my family with breast or ovarian cancer) it didn't seem urgent. It was.

And now, tomorrow (Tuesday the 17th), I'll be heading into my oncologist appointment at Penn expecting to hear, based on the results of my scans from Friday the 13th (spooky!) that the initial tumor has gotten bigger again and that I will need to leave the clinical trial and pursue other options. I'm expecting this, though I hope desperately to be wrong, and have a visit to my supervising oncologist at Dana-Farber in Boston planned for the 19th. From there I'll go to Christmas with my parents and New Year's with a friend in Colorado before returning home to whatever new treatment 2020 has in store.

Now, obviously I hate that I'm going through this at all. After I heard about the tumor growth last month I was crushed that I hadn't even managed to make the average time that participants in this particular trial found to make a positive difference (6 months...I got 4). And I still am crushed. I'm not going to lie and say that I'm over it ,or not furious, or not disappointed. But what I especially hate right now is that it feels seasonal and like it's going to ruin my holidays again and stretch on through all the coldest and most miserable months...just like last year. It's a series of bleak anniversaries that I was already dreading even when things were going well. And now that they're not, well, you can imagine how dread is compounded with fear, anger, and sadness.

Since not all of you were there (and since this blog did not exist) let me tell you a little about what it was like at this time last year. [Account below the cut]

As I said above, it was around now (December 19th, actually) that I first called my GP's office to talk to them about the lump I had been aware of (but not really concerned by) for a few weeks. It's likely that it was around for far longer than that - long enough, certainly, for me to be diagnosed Stage 4 from the start. There are a lot of reasons why I didn't "catch it" earlier. (I actually hate this phrasing. It makes it sound like I could or should have been more vigilant and thus bear responsibility for my own illness.) I won't go into them here except to say that the previous year had itself been the worst of my entire life. There was a lot of loss and it's not really an exaggeration to say that it annihilated me. But I was able, with the support of friends and family, to reconstitute myself. I was proud of having done it too. What I didn't realize, though, was that in rebuilding myself some parts were coming back...wrong, almost as though psychic damage had been written on a cellular level.

“Did you know?" "Could you tell?" Nearly everyone asks me these questions, or some variation on them, at some point. I would say that I’d like to ban them from all discussions except that they are all I think of all day, asking myself: Did I know? Could I tell? And (more accusatory) “Why didn’t I know? Why couldn’t I tell?”. Despite knowing better, I still often believe that I brought this upon myself. I believe that I should have noticed sooner or, when I did notice, I should have acted faster. But, the thing was, I just couldn’t stand for another thing to go so horribly wrong in my life. So when I look back at this time, the time before I was aware of a lump in my breast, I can hardly fault myself for not noticing. I first felt that something was wrong with the swelling in my breast that would not go down around Thanksgiving 2018. I Googled furiously and convinced myself repeatedly that it was probably hormones, a cyst, or an infection. I assessed my risk factors (0) and and the chance that something so terrible would happen to me right after this other terrible thing had happened.

Surely, I felt, the universe couldn’t be that cruel.

I called in mid-December and my doctor’s office told me it would be hard to fit me in around the holidays. What I described sounded like it was probably benign and, since my risk level was so low and since I had even had it confirmed that I was cancer-free in 2016 (when they did a spinal tap because my chronic fatigue was so bad and my white blood cell counts so high), they advised me just to come in when I was back in January. I stayed in St. Louis for a memorial service, celebrating the life of the woman who was effectively another grandmother to me--my parents’ oldest and dearest friend--and had a strange feeling the whole time. I remember sitting among her very many friends and family, surrounded by photographs and poetry and music and all the signs of how loved she was, thinking with an improbable certainty that people would soon be remembering me this way and hoping that they would say I had positively affected their lives as much as she had.

Meanwhile, the swelling was huge. It was hot to the touch and ached like a bruise. I tried to see this as a good thing; heat and redness mean infection, which meant it was probably mastitis. I was worried enough to call my parents’ doctor to ask if I should go into the cancer center at Barnes-Jewish Hospital. He said the same things about how unlikely it was and how it was probably infected. I saw my doctor when I returned and, worried, she nonetheless prescribed me a course of antibiotics. She was also hoping, I think, not to be confronted with the truth.

The antibiotics upset my stomach terribly as did my constant anxiety. After five days with no effect, she gave me a stronger one, which also did nothing. It was now ten days since I had talked to her, a full month since I had first called. She sent me for a biopsy. It was on the 21st of January. On the 24th I heard that the tumor was cancerous. On the 28th, I heard that my cancer was also in my lungs and that I would need more scans and MRIs to determine the full extent of the metastasis. Then the terrifying and seemingly endless cycle of scans and bad news began. I don’t want to rehearse that here, though these months hold a series of bad anniversaries for me. What I want to do is to say that, at a certain point, of course I knew. Unlike most people in my life, who regarded the biopsy almost as a formality, I absolutely thought that I had cancer. Maybe it was just because I try to prepare myself for the worst. (I was still notably unprepared for this.) But maybe it was because I knew my body, even on a subconscious level, and could tell something was amiss.

I do have a sense, too, of when treatments are working or not. I can’t tell you the extent of why I know, often, but the tumor itself is one indicator. It’s very large and when things aren’t working it gets even larger. It ambiently hurts all the time, in a way that is subtle and that it is easy to almost (but never) forget and that is too minimal to mention to people. (Actually, these past two days it has hurt so badly that it feels like someone punched me. I cannot take this to be a good sign.) Since I heard my latest results from my doctor a month ago the tumor has gotten bigger. I probe it all the time, examining myself in the mirror from different angles--bra off, bra on--like when I was so desperately hoping to grow real breasts in middle school. I assess how far it sticks out in one position vs. another and how red it is at certain times. I try to convince myself that the pain is hormonal, that the apparent growth is how I am standing. But that’s just repeating what I was doing at this same time last year, casting around hopefully for an explanation that isn’t the one I fear.

For tomorrow, I hope for the best, but I expect the worst. It may be that you think I’m too worried too soon; I know some of you may. And let me tell you that, although it's contrary to my nature in general, I would love to be wrong. I hope I am. I will do my best to share news here, even in a short post, since I know that those of you along for the journey will be anxious to know too. For tonight, I'm scared. I'm better able to cope with bad news once I know what it is and am able to make a plan or a choice - to exert some control. And I'm certainly (sad to say) not feeling much of the spirit of Christmas, which is a shame since I actually love it. If you have extra love or cheer or, heck, any Miracles on 34th Street (I'm willing to commute!) please send them my way.

Love, Bex

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #282

“daddy’s flown across the ocean / leaving just a memory / a snapshot in the family album / daddy, what’d you leave behind for me?”

What is your favorite type of dance? I like modern dances, especially those unusual or creepy with unique music. They’re the dances I look forward to watching in dance competitions. Do you find making scenes in public fun? Oh fuck no. Lemonade or pink lemonade? Pink is Supreme in so many ways. Where do you feel safest? At home, especially if Mom is here. Have you ever been to a gay pride parade? No, but I’d love to. Would you take your dream job if it were out of the country? No. I don’t want to move to Africa. What do you like to do when you're home alone? HAHA okay so I almost exclusively watch Unus Annus when Mom isn’t home because I will almost without a doubt cackle at least once, and… explaining why I’d be laughing would be WILD. UA is a fucking gift & I’mma miss it when it’s gone. What kind of music calms you down? My best bet is nostalgic music that I hold very close, like Ozzy. The soundtracks to SotC and SH2 are also magical when it comes to soothing me. Who did you last go to a park with? Uhhhh… probably not since I took family pictures for someone. Got some nice ones. Have you ever been robbed? Thankfully, no. Are you working, a student, both, or neither? Neither, and at nearly 25, it’s fucking humiliating. I’m thinking of appealing my disability case (you very rarely get it the first time), but of course self-doubt and anxiety just slaps me across the face again and again by asking, “Do you really need it?” That shit is agonizing. Very highly regarded people in my life agree that it’s realistic for me, at least at this moment, while I sort out my mental health. I don’t plan on being on it forever, fuck no. But right now I am, no matter what anyone says, a leech in my home. What's your favorite holiday? Christmas. I prefer Halloween’s “vibe,” of course, but I am much more excited and just thankful at Christmastime, especially now as an aunt with children who *understand* the holiday. Their joy and excitement is enough of a gift to me. It’s always really hard on Mom because she’s convinced she doesn’t do enough (she cries at least once like… every year), but my sisters and I always reassure her. It’s also a nice opportunity to see Dad and my stepmom, also with my sister’s family, and once again we get to see the kids so happy. But enough about them; what I love most about Christmas is I generally am able to put my troubles into perspective and take the time to remember I am, in the big picture, lucky to have what and who I do. And SNOW!!!!! If you can’t tell I’m stoked for Christmas. Do you prefer male or female friends? Both are great, but I’m more relaxed with female friends because of the whole “scared of men” ordeal. What's your favorite dessert? Biiiiihhhhh lemme get my hands on ice cream. Do you ever go on chatroulette or omegle? Noooo, I never did. That shit creeps me out. Besides, I’m shy. What kind of tea do you drink? None. Do you know anyone in a gang? Not to my knowledge… What color is your fridge? White. We decided to use the fridge already in this house versus our old one. Is your phone mostly on vibrate, silent, or ringtone? It’s just about always on vibrate. Do you own black sunglasses? I don’t own any sunglasses. Are you currently looking for a job? Fuck if I know. Not actively, but if something suitable magically popped up, I’d definitely pursue it. Do you watch MTV? No. Do you like to tell people who you like? Historically, I tend to keep my mouth shut about it to people who know that love interest unless explicitly asked, and even then, it depends on if I think they’ll keep their mouth shut. How often do you braid your hair? It’s too short to be braided. I very rarely had it braided beforehand. What color is your microwave? Black. Do you wash your face in the morning when you wake up? If I remember, especially if I’m groggy. Are you interested in the ocean? No more or no less than the average person. What's a big turn on for you? Keeping physical stuff outta this, I’m just such a fuckin sucker for being authentically romantic lmao. Have you ever thought about being a teacher? Heeeeeelllllll no. What's the first thing you do when you turn your computer on? Close out of the stuff that automatically pops up after it starts. Do you drink Gatorade? Ugh, ew, no. Do you hate when people replace 0's with O's? EX: 9:OO AM. Lol no, it’s honestly aesthetically pleasing in some formats. Did you hate riding the bus? Some of my best school memories are the long bus rides home w/ Jason so uh- Do you ever use XOXO in texts, letters etc..? Nah. Has anyone ever told you they liked you to your face? Yeah. Have you ever touched an elephant? No. Reading or writing? Writing. Do you have a childhood nickname? Mom called (and sometimes still does lakjdf;alkwe) me “Twinkie.” She gave sweets-oriented nicknames to all her kids. Have you ever had a Moon Pie? UGH they’re gross. I have this faint memory as a kid of a sweetheart babysitter my sisters and I had always offering us banana moon pies as a snack or dessert, idr. I’ve always hated anything banana-flavored. Has your car ever had troubles? N/A What's your birthstone? Amethyst. Would you join the navy? I want nothing to do with anything remotely related to war. What's your favorite board game? Battleship. Do you like chess? I’ve never played it nor even know the rules. If you’ve ever tried drugs or alcohol, what was your reason for first trying it? I was absolutely parched after a long, sweaty walk and was offered it to “try” by my mom without me knowing it was alcohol… the “WAIT NO STOP” from everyone was so quick lmao. It was just hard lemonade, so nothing super serious. Do you think you could ever have an abortion if you unexpectantly turned up pregnant right this second? I probably would. There is no fucking way I can emotionally handle carrying a baby right now. But I’d feel like absolute shit, even though I’m pro-choice. I just don’t want to picture myself in that situation. Is there a situation where you caved into peer pressure and regretted it? Probably. Although generally, I’m very resilient to peer pressure when it comes to something I really don’t want to do. What is your favorite video game console? Why? PS2, of course. I think the best games came from that era, many ahead of their time. Example, the original Shadow of the Colossus graphics massively pressured the limits of the software, and it still to this day blows me away. Sure, you have some lag in return, but the end result was just magnificent. I seriously, seriously, seriously hope I’m able to play the remake one day. When you lost your virginity, were you sober? I was. As of this minute, what is going through your mind? How I need a change and purpose in life so motherfucking badly. Where’s the last place you went? I was riding around with Mom, doing some errands. Are both of your blood parents still in your life? Yes. When was the last time you went apple picking? Never. Do you have a good relationship with your cousins? We don’t really… have a relationship. We don’t talk, we just kinda “exist” knowing we’re related. What was the last kids movie you saw? I watched some of Hotel Transylvania 3 with my niece and nephew. Do you know anyone who was born in Africa? When I was still in college, there was at least one guy in my class who was. Tutored me in math. Patience of a saint, haha. Have you ever been to an internet cafe? I actually have zero clue what that is. Has the year gone quickly for you so far? I’ve barely discerned 2018-2020, if I’m being honest with you. It’s just a lump of time where I’ve done jack-all. I mean yeah, school fits in there somewhere, but mentally I wasn’t in a wonderful place and haven’t been “happy” for a long time. My mental state has been the same for a few years. How many siblings does your significant other have? N/A Are you one of those people who can drink vodka straight? Oh, I hiiiighly doubt it. I loathe the taste of alcohol. Do you share a middle name with any of your friends? I legitimately have one of the most basic white bitch middle names in America, I know tons. How many pairs of jeans do you own? None. Do you know the name of the pharmacist at your local drug store? One, yes, considering Mom worked there before the cancer and is still in touch with this pharmacist. What flavor is your toothpaste? Mint. Are you sleepy right now? I think I’m permanently sleepy. Do you like crime films and tv shows? Not especially. Are you bitter about anything? Many things. What was the first online account you remember having? Neopets. My older sister helped me set it up when I was somewhere around eight. Do you use emojis? More than I used to. I’m gradually converting from emoticons to emojis, oof. What was the last type of soda you drank? Mountain Dew. Do you remember much from high school? I probably remember too much from high school, if I’m being honest. I remember far too much in far too much detail during the almost four years I dated Jason. Where would you go for the ultimate honeymoon? Probably the Bahamas, mostly for the pink beaches, aha. It would also be an incredible photography opportunity. Do you know anyone who has a strong accent that is hard to understand? My former best friend’s dad was so southern that yes, I could barely understand him whatsoever. If you had to get a tattoo tomorrow, what would you get? If you mean a fresh, new one and not a glow-up on the Mark tribute tat I’ve mentioned five thousand times, a tribute to Teddy featuring his portrait, pawprint, and the Powerwolf lyrics “and we’ll meet where the wild wolves have gone.” I’m going to be picky as a motherfucker about the design itself, though, so realistically it probably wouldn’t be tomorrow since I’d probably commission people to draw in varying styles. Ugh, I need that tattoo gun, my man. What was the last podcast you listened to? Do you listen to it regularly? That would be 4 Peens in a Pod (it’s… not a porn I swear, it’s Fischfuck and the boys lmao). I’m waaaaaaaaaaay behind on it, though. I watch so many different things now that I’m behind on like… everything I watch/listen to. Are you on a first-name basis with your boss? (or last boss if unemployed) I think I was with all of them? What was the last thing you wrote in a Word document? This survey. Because I combine short ones into Big Boys that I usually don’t finish in one go, I save my progress on it. Who do you miss and what do you miss about them? I miss a number of people and would rather not retrospect on them. What were the best and worst costumes you’ve ever worn? *shrug* Do you know anybody who is gay and married? I think so. What did you last take painkillers for? A headache. Are there any hobbies you want to get back into? Ugh. A whole fucking lot. I’ve thought quite a bit recently on how I miss video editing, but I just don’t have the motivation and dedication for that anymore. Have you ever shared a home with a friend? Yes. What’s the craziest or weirdest place you’ve ever slept? Nowhere that strange at all… Probably just like, the floor, but even then with blankets and stuff. What did you have for lunch today and who made it? I haven't had lunch yet. Are you allergic to anything? How did you find out? Pollen is pretty obvious, while serious discoloring and itching let me know I was allergic to silver. Have you ever been on a date with someone you met online? How was it? Yeah, I was visiting her for a couple weeks. It was nice. Who was the last very physically attractive person you saw? In ~real life~, probably some friend on Facebook. Do you know anyone who is deaf? We recently found out actually that my youngest niece is deaf in her left ear due to a massive buildup of fluid in it. I’m so ready to hear about her reaction to hearing normally once it’s taken care of. Has there ever been a person you regret ever being friends with? Probably at some point. “Ever” makes this question difficult. Do you think you have a good understanding on love? Yes. What do you think of your parent(s)? I love them both immensely while acknowledging their flaws. What celebrity do you think should of never become famous? I don’t care enough to think on this honestly haha. Did you ever get into the Twilight saga craze? What about the Harry Potter craze? Neither. What's your opinion about Katy Perry's song "I Kissed a Girl"? It was bold for its time, for sure. I’ve never minded it. Actually since coming out as bi I’ve known that this song has to be included in the recession dances of my wedding if my partner is female lmao. Do you believe in heaven? If so, what's it like? If not, why? I hope there’s some sort of total bliss after death if you’re deserving of such, but I don’t know. I definitely don’t know how I actually picture it. Even if there’s not, well, I’m assuming I just won’t exist anymore, so I wouldn’t be able to care anyway. Sometimes I hope that's the case. What email service do you use for your main (or only) email account? Hotmail. Did you ever believe in the Tooth Fairy? Yeah. I remember there was one time where “she” didn’t trade my tooth for munz and I was so mad lmao. Mom apparently forgot and slipped something under the pillow while I was getting ready for school. How I fell for it, who knows man, kids are wild. How do you feel about Taco Bell? I’m not a Mexican food fan, really, but I do love their cheese (with or without chicken) quite a bit. The cinnamon bite things are bomb as FUCK, too. I’m still mad tilted they took potato products off their menu tho because I used to destroy the fiesta potatoes. How often do you go on to YouTube? I’m like… always on it. Not focusing on it at all times, but something’s in the background. Back when Spongebob Squarepants was famous, were you interested in it? Well of course, man. What's your dream pet? Ugggghhhh a sunset morph ball python, probably. Buuut I’ve seen some over $2k with their rarity. More realistically, I really, really want a Brazilian Black tarantula. And an arctic morph hognose. I want a lot of pets. ;_; Who's been your favorite teacher growing up, and why? God, I have a lot, honestly. All things considered, the answer is probably Miss Tobey, who was my physical science teacher in high school. She’s an extremely close family friend now involved regularly in my family’s lives. She can be… difficult and says shit before thinking, but we love her nevertheless. What's your favorite fairy tale? Fuck outta here if you say Shrek isn’t one. Do you have a favorite pen? Uh, no… I barely ever use pens anyway. Has a child ever asked you a question you found difficult to answer? Yeah; it happens sometimes with my niece and nephew. Name five books you've read in the past year. I think I’ve read the first three Wings of Fire book within the same year, and I’m currently on the forth. Other than those, I started The Testaments by Margaret Atwood, but only got through the prologue I think before my focus shifted onto WoF. I still plan on reading it at some point, though. ^Are any of those books your favorite? No. The prequel to The Testaments, The Handmaid’s Tale, is very high up there, though. Are you a person that enjoys re-reading books? Not at all. Once I read it once, I’m done. There are VERY few books I’ve reread, and most of those were children’s books from when I was little. Do you have a favorite talk show host? Don’t watch any. Which sounds the most refreshing: a hot shower or a cold one? I prefer hot showers unless I seeeeeriously need to cool down. Have you ever made your own soap? No. Can you sleep with socks on? UGH NO. When was the last time you were pissed beyond belief and why? Ummm good question. I don’t know about *that* mad. Maybe when Ashley’s mother-in-law shared a massively homophobic article that condoned conversion therapy on Facebook that resulted in me removing her from my friends and RAGING to my mom about it. That was forever ago, though. Do you have a favorite candle brand? No. What is your opinion on taxidermy? I have… very mixed feelings. If the animal was hunted for sport, then it’s fuckin disgusting; you literally killed an animal with the intention to show off the fact you’re a goddamn murderer. On the other hand, taxidermy of naturally-deceased animals can be educational, and even… artistic sometimes? I don’t know. I can’t really pick one stance over the other. Would you ever want to own a body part in a jar? Actually, yes, particularly of fetal animals (that WERE NOT killed for the sake of displaying), but for the same reasons above, I’m not sure if I would *really* do it. They are incredibly interesting to me, more so than taxidermy probably, but yeah, I still question the morality of it. What is the worst thing you have ever done to your own hair? I don’t think I’ve ever really done a “bad” thing to my hair. What qualities of yours do you think could potentially harm a relationship? I’m very clingy and, in the beginning, very paranoid that you’re going to leave. Have any of your childhood habits carried over into adolescence/adulthood? I had AWFUL separation anxiety from my mom for a very long time as a kid, and I guess that evolved into my extreme inability to handle loss well, maybe. I’d say they’re at least somewhat related. What is the first band that comes to mind when I say 'dark'? Cradle of Filth popped up first. As far as relationships go, what are your biggest deal-breakers? Abuse, arrogance, and distrust probably top the list. Be honest: do looks really matter to you? Nah. It’s nice to be physically attracted to my partner, but it’s not a must. Have you ever done something simply because you were of age? No. Do you think it's worth it to tell someone you had feelings for them when you don't have them anymore? I mean, what’s the situation? Are you hanging out, talking about relationships casually? I’d say it’s fine then if it’s relevant to the conversation. I don’t think it’s worth going out of your way to tell someone you liked them if you don’t anymore, though. Have you ever done something you once thought you'd be too chicken to do? Y’know that ride at fairs where you go up really high on a circular thing with other people and then drop abruptly? That. I screamed like a mf lmao. I had to put a lot of effort into not yelling “SHIIIIIIIIIIIT” lmao. What's a food you love but don't get to eat very often? Stuff involving shrimp, ig. What's your favorite mythical being? Dragons! Have you ever felt a baby kick? I don’t think so, and I don’t want to, considering it’s fucking terrifying to me. I can’t even see a baby move without screaming and wanting to hurl. When is the last time you did something truly fun, and what was it? Who the fuck knows… What is the worst thing you've ever done when you were really angry? Said things I shouldn’t have. Are there any pills you take on a daily basis? If so, what? A lot. I can’t be bothered to go through all of them. At what age do you first remember feeling butterflies in your stomach around someone? I’m not sure. Do you feel that way around anyone now? I don’t think so. What is your main heritage? German or Irish, idr which is more prominent. What is a song that you hate to admit you like? “Bitches” by Hollywood Undead came to me first lmao. What inspires you to get off your bum and do something productive? More than anything, watching inspirational YouTube videos. What part of your body have you had the most problems with in your life? I suppose maybe my ears? I had tubes put in as a kid, I had an absolutely agonizing ear infection once, I had earwax adhered to my eardrum, and they've always been STUPID dry and flaky. Are you watching your weight? Like a hawk, but it doesn’t seem to matter anyway. :^) Have you ever become really good friends with someone you found online? Most of my closest friends I’ve met online. What is the coolest tattoo you've ever seen? You’re asking the wroooong person, lol. I’ve just seen way too many… Have you ever created anything artistic that you're proud of? If so, what? Lots of things; drawings, some writing, photographs, video edits… What do you like on your hotdogs, if you eat hotdogs? Just ketchup and mustard. What is a subject that makes you uncomfortable? Sex. What is a subject you can talk on and on about and not get sick of it? MEERKATS and MARK What is the worst thing someone could do to you emotionally? Tell me I’m weak. Or that my mental illnesses truly do make me unlovable. Just essentially do fucking not make me feel what Jason did. What is the worst thing you've ever done to someone emotionally? Said some extremely mean and potentially scarring shit.

[silverlightraita]

Well I’m doing it anyways! Cause why not???

....

I mean it’s not necessary but I like these kinds of posts cause I can learn more about the people I follow so like... yeh. Imma do one now.

Blog Name: SilverLightRaita

AO3 name: SilverLightRaita

Nickname (given via readers): Raita

Why the name? It can actually be broken into two parts: Silverlight and Raita.

Raita is a bit confusing to explain. During my early weeaboo days of high school, I decided to use a lot of Japanese terms in my naming systems and this account name took the fall (note: I made up this name but never used it except once). Raita is based on the kanji ライター or Raitā, which translates to writer... I was and am still a big weeb so I kept the name. Unfortunately, when I tried to spell it as “raitā,” the website I used was stupid and wouldn’t let me do the “ā” so now it’s just Raita.

Silverlight is legit a warrior cat name... Middle school was my cat era. I like the flow of the name though so I decided to keep it and save it for later. I don’t draw the character much anymore (haven’t in years actually) so there she is:

Combined, my name essentially translates to “Silverlight Writer.”

How old are you? Early twenties currently. I’m finishing up university right now as an art student.

Favorite Color(s): I do like earthy tones but my favorite colors are probably dark mustard yellow, scum green, and honey brown.

Favorite Animal: while I do like reptiles a lot, my favorite animal is actual red pandas.

Favorite Anime: My Hero Academia, Snow White with Red Hair, Haikyuu, Charlotte, and Kuroko no Basket

Favorite Books/Manga: Alex Rider, SPY X FAMILY, My Hero Academia

Favorite Non-Anime Shows: Criminal Minds, Hawaii 5-0, Avatar the Last Airbender

Is your hair actually blue/gray? Ha, no. My hair doesn’t really hold on to blue colors like that unfortunately. I did have the ends of my hair dyed turquoise one year but that’s about it. It’s more for character design aesethics but my hair is balayaged in real life, just not blue.

What do you use to draw? I use an iPad Pro and sometimes I’ll sketch out on paper first so I can transfer it onto my iPad. I use an app called SketchClub, though I do not use the community functions. With tradition art, I also have Copics as well as other alcohol based markers like Master’s Touch and Artistloft.

Is this your only blog? No actually. This blog is just for fanfiction, art for that fanfiction, and posts that relate to the fandoms I write about. I have a main personal blog and a blog dedicated to one of my favorite ships.

What have you written?

I have mostly only written My Hero Academia works. I have a series of small one-shots called Dining Out that are a bit more romance/friendship based (todomomo, izuocha, deku squad friendship) that I need to finish at some point.

My main pride and joy is my Dabi is Touya Todoroki story called Familia Bonds that I have been developing since Spring 2019. The main work is currently completed and I have been periodically sharing one-shots based on small snippets from the finished piece from other characters POVs.

My other pride and joy is Crashing and Saving, a Alex Rider/Hawaii 5-0 crossover story. It was my first long term completed story and is something I am very proud of. I had been working on it since high school and started posting/completed it during college.

I have two small works from other fandoms as well but they’re basically me testing the waters of AO3 and aren’t exactly stellar pieces.

Any other interests besides writing? I am an artist as you have seen from the things I scrap up for my stories. I love memes and reading other people’s works. I plan on making fanart for other people’s stories in the future. Otherwise, I do play D&D a good bit with my university friends (my favorite class is rogue). I make memes for the group which is very entertaining for all parts of the party.

Any big writing plans?

I do plan on doing another long term My Hero Academia story (a few of them actually). I currently only have art and an outline for my Dragon Mentor AU as seen here and here but I do have a few other concepts such as a YouTuber Deku AU and a Vigilante/Anti-Hero Deku AU in the works. I’ll be posting more progress on those here from now on.

Other than that, I have a few small Familia Bonds one-shots going on until the end of the summer and I plan to finish the Dining Out series.

[gothpanda]

A Little Bit of Attitude Ch. 12: Groupie

WORD COUNT: 6.4K

A/N: I have no idea how long I’m making this fic

WARNINGS: Domestic assault

Read On Ao3

Previous/Next

SEPTEMBER 1st, 1983

Four months went fast for everyone, right as the new season fell onto everyone. The mall was almost a ghost town due to kids of all ages back at school. Tommy and Vince walked through the mall, each sipping on a soda from the food court. It was a crazy past four months for Motley Crue with finally reaching complete rockstar status. Sadly, making an album on the other side of the country also meant missing out on certain things.

“So T-Bone, what’s been up with Sammi? She’s been super busy the whole time we’ve been gone?” Vince asked, throwing away his empty cup.

“You haven’t talked to her yourself?” Tommy says to Vince, chewing on the red straw with scrunched eyebrows. Vince only shook his head, giving an exaggerated frown. “I mean she started school a week ago, I think, but all of summer she was just working. Athena would take her out sometimes,” said Tommy.

Vince pressed his lips firmly together, shoving his hands in his jean jacket pockets. Walking to Contempo was filled with dread for Vince, not knowing how Sammi was going to react to seeing him since coming home. It was dead silence coming from Sammi, only making Vince think multiple thoughts run in his head.  “I wouldn’t worry about it, Vince. Pretty sure when she sees you, she’ll be happy.” Tommy said, patting Vince on the back. Vince only mustered up a small smile, feeling nerves kick in.

As the duo walked the doorway of the popular store, Vince first noticed Amanda in the front with her back to them. Thankfully with Tommy to his left, he was able to keep his head low and hide next to his tall friend. Tommy quickly noticed Sammi in the very back of the store, hanging up dresses on the sales rack. He grabbed a random red short dress from a rack, picking up the pace on his steps.

“Hello Miss, do you happen to have this in a size 0? I need a dress for a party,” Tommy said, holding up the dress up to him. Sammi slowly turned around, a smile growing as she withheld a laugh. She looked up and down, cracking a chuckle. “No sorry, we don’t have a size 0. That dress isn’t for you anyways,” Sammi said, smiling big at her brother. Sammi wrapped her arms around Tommy’s waist, a bit tighter than usual. Tommy tucked Sammi’s head under his chin, petting her hair. Pulling away, Sammi caught a quick glimpse of Vince behind Tommy.

“Hi, Vince…” Sammi said with a straight face

“Hey, Sam,” Vince said looking at the ground beneath him.

Tommy looked between them, being able to notice the coldness from his sister. “I’m really happy to see you finally, Tommy. It’s been boring without you,” Sammi said

“You mean me and the guys, right?” Tommy said, walking to Vince as he swung an arm around his shorter friend. Sammi gives a repressed smile, “Yeah it was boring without all of you,” Sammi said looking straight in the eye. Vince slightly opened his mouth before closing it fast from the sight of a blonde come behind Sammi.

“Well, what a lovely surprise seeing you two back. Hey Vince,” Amanda said, smirking at the boys. Sammi bit her lip, looking away from everyone around her. Vince stiffened in his stance, clearing his throat glancing at Sammi’s discomfort. “Hey…” Vince mumbled.

“Hi Amanda, we just came to see my sister,” Tommy said holding onto Vince a bit tighter. Amanda nodded slowly, turning to look at Sammi. “Isn’t that nice, but she’s working so maybe you two should go. Wouldn’t want our manager getting mad,” Amanda said with a smile that made Tommy and Vince begin to feel uncomfortable. Sammi stepped in front of Amanda, arms crossed with a slouch. “I was actually gonna go on my lunch break before they came, Amanda,” Sammi said, forcing a smile.

“Alright then. Enjoy your lunch with these two.” Amanda said pursing her lips and walking away from the trio.

“I’m just gonna go get my bag and I’ll be right back.” Sammi said quietly, walking past Tommy and Vince. When she wasn’t within eyeshot of the boys, Tommy faced Vince, holding onto his shoulders.

“What the fuck was that?” Tommy whispered.

Vince kept his lips shut firmly tight, shrugging his shoulder “I was clueless the whole time,”

Tommy wrinkled his eyebrows, “You were being clueless or acting clueless?”

“I seriously have no idea what was going on with those two I swear,” Vince said holding his hands up in mercy. Tommy let his arms fall to his side with a huff. “M’kay, Vince,”

*

“So Sam, how’ve you been?” Vince asked, grabbing a fry from the shared basket in the middle of the small square table. Sammi pushed around the salad in front of her, keeping her head down but shot a glance up at Vince. Vince could feel his palms become clammy instantly, looking away from the brunette. “I’ve been good. Just working. Being a decent adult,” Sammi says coldly, taking a bit of her food. Tommy sat in between the two, stuffing a cheeseburger in his mouth hoping to have a nice lunch.

Sammi flipped her hair to one side, turning her attention to Tommy. “Anyway, what’s the latest status on your album?” Sammi asks, resting her chin in the palm of her hand. Tommy quickly cleaned his mouth, “It’s gonna be out on the 26th! It sounds sick, Sammi! Nikki did awesome writing the songs. And of course, Vince singing them,” Tommy put a hand on Vince's shoulder, shaking him up a bit.

“That sounds awesome then. Proud you all were able to get it done in New York.” Sammi said sweetly.

“Actually the reason why me and Vince came down here was because we have a music video to shoot,” Tommy said with a proud grin. Sammi’s eyes became wide, looking back at her brother and Vince. “Oookay, and what does that have to do with me?”

“Could you please take Mama and Dad tomorrow to the shoot,” Tommy asked, grinning wide hoping for the best.

Sammi rolled her eyes, “Tommy I’m busy,”

“With what?! You don’t even know what time it’s at!” Tommy said, raising his voice.

“What time is it at?”

“We’re gonna start at 10. It’s gonna be an all-day thing,” Vince said, leaning back in his chair. Sammi looked over at Vince, “I’m still busy,”

Tommy hung his head with a huff, slouching into his seat.  “You seriously can’t skip a class or switch at work or what the hell that’s making you busy?”

“Tommy I don’t want to go to your fucking video shoot. You have another sister you can ask,” Sammi said getting up from her seat as she grabbed her trash. Walking back, Sammi swung her jean jacket on and her cross-body purse onto one shoulder. She looked down at Vince and Tommy, both giving big puppy dog eyes.

“I already asked Athena and she said she really couldn’t. Please Sammi?” Tommy asks softly.

Sammi pursed her lips outwards, thinking for a moment. “You do know other people have normal lives right? Like having a 9 to 5. And not doing stupid shit out of a whim,” Sammi said looking at Vince. Tommy nodded. Vince shifting uncomfortably in his seat as he looked away from everyone.

“In that case, you know our dad has an actual job. I’m not taking Mama and Dad to your fucking video shoot,” Sammi said, grabbing her soda from the table and leaving the guys in the middle of the food court.

Tommy huffs, running a hand through his hair. He turns to Vince, “You fucking sure you’re clueless?”

*

In a small dimly lit bedroom, Sammi sat at her wooden desk with a book in front of her. She mumbled quietly as she read, taking a moment to then write down notes in her notebook next to her. She was in full concentration mode until a knock on her door interrupted her flow. Sammi huffed in annoyance, closing her eyes, “Come in,” she said loud enough.

Britney slowly opened the door, peeking her head behind it. “Hey, Sammi are you hungry?” Sammi turned in her seat, smiling at her friend. She scratched her eyebrow, thinking for a moment. “If you say no I’m going to assume you’re lying,” Britney said with a smile. Sammi gave a chuckle, finally walking over “You’re right I am hungry. Did you make anything?”

Britney nodded gleefully. “Chicken alfredo with mushrooms and spinach! One of your favorites. Come on,” said Britney, grabbing Sammi by the arm, bringing her out of her room for once since the afternoon. Down into the kitchen, Sammi was hit with the aroma of garlic and chicken only to make her more hungry. Sammi was lucky to have a roommate who liked to cook extravagant meals without ever being asked. Britney could be silent as a mouse while all of a sudden she presents a ten-course meal. Sammi sat down on the table, taking a piece of garlic bread from the basket in front of her. Britney placed a full plate down in front of Sammi and another for herself.

“Amanda isn’t gonna eat with us?” Sammi asked, twirling the noodles with her fork.

“She said she had a date tonight. Either way, I doubt she’d want to eat this,” Britney said, taking a bit of her food.

“But speaking of Amanda, she told me you got some visitors at work,” Britney said, glancing up at Sammi. Sammi only looked at her food with a frown on her face. “What was up with that?”

“Tommy wanted me to take our parents to their music video shoot tomorrow. And I boldly said no. Vince was quiet the whole time,” Sammi says looking up at Britney.

Britney gave a sympathetic smile, “Don’t be distant with Tommy, Sammi. You were completely fine talking to him while he was away,”

“I’m not! I have work. My dad has work which Tommy didn’t freaking consider,” Sammi said in a taut voice. “It’s just a little inconvenient and sometimes we all can’t cater to Motley Crue,” Sammi says with a shrug and a pout of sarcasm. Sammi shook her head, returning to the plate of food. Silence came between the two girls as they almost finished their food, Britney thinking on her words. Out of nowhere, the shiny white wall phone began to ring in the living room. Sammi took a look, getting up from her seat as she walked to the front of the condo.

“Hello,” Sammi answered.

“Hello, my lovebug!” Mrs. Bass responded on the other line.

Sammi sat on the arm of the sofa, “Oh hey, Mama. What’s going on?”

“I wanted to call to tell you we’re all going to Tommy’s music video tomorrow!” Mrs. Bass said with enthusiasm.

Sammi's eyes widened as she mentally cursed to herself, “What do you mean we’re going to Tommy’s video shoot? Doesn’t dad have work?” Sammi said, scratching the back of her head.

“He was able to take off for the day. Tommy said we have to be there by 1. We’ll pick you up at 12,” Mrs. Bass said, not seeming to negotiate about whether or not Sammi could get out of this one. Sammi huffed, closing her eyes as she tapped her fingers against the arm of the sofa.

“But Mama I have worked at that time. I can’t switch,” Sammi said with annoyance.

“Samantha, you’ve always been able to work things out at your job. You know you are able to come. It’s good to be present for your brother’s achievements.” Mrs. Bass said, making Sammi roll her eyes in dread.

“Okay Mama, you’re right. I’ll be ready when you guys get here,” Sammi said.

“Wonderful! See you tomorrow, my lovebug,” the line went dead, having Sammi shut the phone back onto the wall. She leaned her head against the wall, lightly tapping her head against it.

“Guess who’s going to see Vince and Nikki against her will!” Sammi yelled sarcastically, sitting back down. “I doubt anything could go wrong. They are gonna have to be professionals for once in their lives,” Britney said, taking the last bite of her food.

“You know what Britney, I hope to god you are right,” said Sammi.

*

SEPTEMBER 2nd 1983

The video set was right in the middle of Hollywood, something no one from the Bass family thought was the case. Mr. Bass spent 15 minutes trying to find the building and an extra 15 on parking alone. Sammi slumped in the backseat of the station wagon, crossing her arms as she looked at the passing building. When Sammi’s dad began to park the car, her habit kicked up again from her nerves. She began biting the brittle nail of her thumb painted purple, her heart beating rapidly in her chest. Everything felt like slow motion to Sammi. Getting out of the car into the beige concrete parking lot. Walking toward the black windowless building, then suddenly fast motion when Sammi saw Doc and Tommy walk up to them.

“Mama and Dad! So happy you guys can make it!” Tommy said gleefully, hugging his parents as they both eye their sons' outfits. The red, black, and silver was the first thing they were able to see from Tommy’s outfit. Mr. Bass eyed Tommy’s studded leather pants while also noticing the lipstick and eyeliner his son was wearing. Mrs. Bass tried her hardest not to laugh at Tommy, only remaining silent with a smile by the look of happiness on her son's face. Sammi kept her arms crossed with a blank stare.

“I want you to first meet our manager, Doc! He’s the guy that helped Athena and Sammi come to Portland with us last year!” Tommy said, patting Doc on the back.

“Hello, lovely to meet you, Mr. and Mrs. Bass. Also lovely to see you again, Sammi,” Doc said with a polite smile and a nod to the Bass clan. Sammi gave a pressed lip smile while her parents were oblivious to the discomfort from Sammi. “Right now we just got on break so Tommy will be able to show you around,”

“Also I have to introduce you two to the guys! Nikki is the brain behind the video!” Tommy said, slightly jumping on the balls of his feet.

“Well, that’s wonderful, Tom. We’re very proud you finally got to your dream,” Mr. Bass said, patting Tommy on his arm showing true love for his son.

“Tommy, how about you take your parents to the set and I have a word with Sammi,” Doc said, looking at Sammi with a smirk most businessmen had. Sammi raised an eyebrow at Doc, “What the hell? Why me?”

“Samantha language,” Mr. Bass said. Sammi glanced at her dad then back at Doc with scrunched eyebrows. Doc nodded to Sammi, “Come with me to find, Nikki.”

Sammi slowly followed Doc through a white hallway aligned with dressing room doors and set techs walking up and down.

“So Sammi, I wanted to talk to you about a job offer,” Doc said, looking at Sammi.

Once again, Sammi raised an eyebrow to Doc, “I already have a job. I’m perfectly fine,”

“Well what about a job that doesn’t involve standing in a store all day long dealing with rude people,” Doc said stopping in front of a white door. Behind it, Sammi was able to hear light moans coming from a girl. In her head she prayed hoping it wasn’t a repeat of May.

“I need an assistant in January when we tour with Ozzy. From what the guys say, you're highly responsible which is great for dealing with them,” said Doc.

“Then the guys must’ve also told you, I’m in college. No offense but I rather deal with rude people than them,” Sammi said flipping her hair. Doc huffed with a nod, “Very well then,” said Doc, knocking on the door once the moans had stopped.

“Hey, Sixx!” Doc said, knocking a bit harder “Tommy’s looking for you, wants to introduce you to his parents,”

Suddenly, the door opened fast to show a short brunette stumble out of balance. She had a tight red dress you would see at a club and overly teased hair. Almost everything she was wearing was red, making her look tacky in Sammi’s opinion. Sammi curled her upper lip at the young woman, “Who the fuck are you?”

The young woman narrowed her eyes at Sammi, pushing past her as she walked down the hall to the set. Doc only chuckled dryly, turning to see Nikki walkover to them. “Well hello, Sammi. Ain’t this a lovely surprise,” Nikki slurred, wiping away anything from his nose with a smirk.

“Get cleaned up to meet Tommy and Sammi’s parents,” Doc said walking away from Nikki. Sammi switched glance between Doc and Nikki, “Was that your new girlfriend for the week?”

Nikki chuckled, “Wouldn’t you like to know, Princess.”  

Sammi rolled her eyes, “Whatever. Just look fucking decent for my parents,”

Sammi walked away from Nikki, following the sound of equipment being removed or fixed. Stepping onto the set, Sammi was in another world that almost seemed apocalyptic. The girls in the far corner near a chain-link fence resembled lionesses but still with theatrical makeup. Sammi scanned her eyes around the whole set until her eyes fell onto the only person wearing more white than black. Vince smiled sheepishly at Sammi remaining in his spot next to Mick. For a second, he almost began taking steps until he heard the echo of Tommy’s voice travel.

“We got pyrotechnics in the back of my set! And look,” Tommy says, grabbing a rock next to him. He tried his hardest to lift until lifting it with ease, “Fake rocks!”

Sammi walked over to her family, still feeling the pair of eyes burning on her skin. Mr. and Mrs. Bass smiled at the beauty of seeing their two children together. From the corner of the set, Nikki and Doc walked out together while the young woman stayed in the corner.

“Oh, here he is! Meet the Sixxter!” Tommy announced clapping hands with Nikki. Sammi stood in the middle of the tall men, crossing her arms with a blank stare.

“Nice to meet you, Nikki.” Mr. Bass says shaking Nikki’s hand.

“It’s so wonderful to finally meet you,” Mrs. Bass says, going up to hug Nikki. It was foreign for Nikki to hug someone. Sammi could immediately tell the discomfort on Nikki’s face.

“Hey Nikki maybe we can invite your family to the next L.A gig,” said Doc, tapping Nikki on the chest.

“Great idea, Doc,” Nikki said sarcastically, rolling his eyes.

“Babe come here,” Tommy said, motioning the young woman to join the group. Sammi turned around, seeing the woman strut forward while also seeing Nikki's discomfort grow. Sammi scrunched her eyebrows at Nikki, right as Tommy wrapped his arm around the woman’s shoulders.

“Mom, Dad, Sammi, this is Roxie! My fiancee!” Tommy said, having his smile grow bigger than it has all day. “Nice to meet everyone,” Roxie said, extending her hand out for someone to grab it. Sammi's eyes widened, looking at her parents' shock as Nikki matched her expression. His eyes went wide, rapidly looking everywhere that wasn’t a Bass family member. Mr. and Mrs. Bass looked could see the concern on both their faces, unable to use their voices for a moment.

“What’s the rush, Tom? Marriage is- is something serious,” Mr. Bass said, stuffing his hands in his blazer pockets.

“Yeah, I know! Look at you guys! You asked mama to marry you the day you met her and she didn’t even know a word of English! That’s what I want too!” Tommy said happily. Before anyone asked any further questions, Nikki quietly stepped back from everyone to disappear back in his dressing room. Sammi clenched her jaw as she saw Nikki walk away, squeezing the inside of her arm to calm her down.

“So, how did you and Tommy meet?” Mrs. Bass asked.

“Well, I was actually hanging out with this other band, but then I saw Tommy and I knew it was totally meant to be” Roxie said, smiling at Mrs. Bass. Sammi rolled her eyes all the way to the back of her head, sucking her teeth. She turned to see Vince and Mick talk in their own little world, beginning to wish she could join.

“Oh, I think I know the word for this! Let me think,” Mrs. Bass says, gently snapping her fingers as she mumbled words in Greek. Sammi quickly went back to the scene in front of her, her lips slowly parting open.

“Groupie! That’s the word! Is that what they call you?” Mrs. Bass says, a smirk growing on her face. Sammi gasped, covering her mouth to repress the loud laugh that wanted to come out. Sammi shifted her gaze between Roxie and Tommy, seeing the scowl the ‘groupie’ had toward her mom. “Is that the right word, Sammi?” Mrs. Bass asks, looking over Roxie to her daughter.

“Yeah, Mama. You’re 100 perfect correct. The word you’re looking for is groupie,” Sammi said looking up and down at Roxie, giggling at the situation. Roxie stormed off the set, leaving Tommy alone.

“Really?” Tommy asked Sammi and his mother with harshness in his voice.

“Dude you are not marrying that girl. Point blank,” Sammi says, turning on her heels aiming to the dressing rooms. Once she was out of sight from everyone, Sammi sped walked all the way to Nikki’s dressing room. She could feel her ear and cheeks get hot as the puzzle pieces were put together. She couldn’t remember a moment she was ever this angry

Sammi busts the door open, the wooden frame hitting the wall then slamming it shut. Nikki lifted his head up, sitting on the floor in front of three lines of coke. Sammi inhaled deeply, violently flipping the tray of white powder. Nikki shot up from the floor, eyes widening with anger to Sammi. “What the fuck, Sammi?!” Nikki shouted.

“Don’t ‘what the fuck’ me! You fucked my brother’s stupid fiancee!” Sammi yelled, shoving Nikki in the chest making him stumble into the black sofa.

“I didn’t do shit!” Nikki yelled as he tried to get up, only to be pushed by Sammi again.

“Doc and I fucking caught you two, you fucking dumbass!” Sammi shouted, “Oh wait, did you snort too much coke to remember the last 20 minutes?” Sammi said in a high pitched voice filled with sarcasm, closing one nostril. Nikki began grinding his teeth, shaking his leg as he looked up at Sammi.

Sammi lowered her torso to Nikki’s face with an icy stare that could give anyone the chills. “Some best fucking friend you are,” Sammi whispered, “And to think I actually thought you were nicer than everyone said,”

“I didn’t think he was that in love with the chick!” Nikki shouted at Sammi’s face.

“Bullshit. You already know how Tommy is with a girl. To fuck his girl right under his nose as Tommy doesn’t give a shit,”

Nikki looked down at his hands, rubbing them nervously. “So are you going to tell Tommy now or what? You already hate the bitch,” Nikki said, a tremble in his voice.

Sammi chuckled, “No, I’m going to wait to see how long you take to break his heart. I’m not telling him shit.” Sammi said standing up straight, looking down at Nikki.

“Sammi I’m fucking sorry,” Nikki said looking up at Sammi with glossy eyes.

“No, you’re not. Out of all the people you choose to fuck over, you picked my brother. Fuck you,” Sammi says, walking out of the room. She leans against the door, feeling her heartbeat out of her chest as she tried to calm her breathing. Sammi snapped out of her trance when she heard a voice down the hall. Pushing herself off the wall, Sammi followed the sound to find Vince and Tommy talking.

“Let’s just go out tomorrow night, Roxie can cool down with some drinks in her and forget everything,” Vince said, leaning against the wall. Tommy twirled a drumstick between his fingers, pacing back and forth. Sammi walked up right next to Vince, scrunching her eyebrows at her brother. Vince’s eyes glued on Sammi, tapping his fingers against his legs anxiously. He bit his lip, hoping for a good chance. Tommy soon saw Sammi in front of her, pointing his drumstick at her.

“You! Why the hell did you gang up on Roxie with Mama?” Tommy asked. Sammi grabbed Tommy’s drumstick, throwing it aimlessly behind him. Vince snickered under his breath while Tommy gasped.

“Because she’s a bitch, Tommy. You seriously couldn’t do any better?” Sammi asks, crossing her arms as she leaned against the wall.

“No, she’s not! She’s a lovely girl! You don’t know her like I do,” Tommy shouted, mimicking Sammi. Sammi rolled her eyes, looking at Vince for any help in her problem.

“How about Sammi comes with us tomorrow,” said Vince, smirking at Sammi. Sammi glared at Vince. “Unless you’re avoiding us again?”

“Fine, if you say Roxie is a lovely person prove it!” Sammi said, flipping her hair. Tommy shocking his head, “Great! We’ll pick you up at 9.”

*

SEPTEMBER 3rd, 1983

8:40 rolled around for Sammi as she finished up ironing her long hair pin-straight in the upstairs hall bathroom. She ran her fingers through her hair, untangling any knots that formed and smoothing any flyaways down. Putting down the flat iron, Sammi inched closer to the mirror to check for any imperfections in her makeup. Her outfit wasn’t out there like Roxie’s might be, but tight white jeans with a red top fit perfectly.

Unplugging the hair tool, Sammi exited the restroom to walk past Amanda’s open bedroom door. Amanda craned her head to catch a glimpse at Sammi, frowning immediately. She jumped out of her bed, making a sharp turn into Sammi’s room.

“And where are you going?” Amanda asks, crossing her arms as she leaned against the door frame. Sammi paid no attention, only carefully debating on a type of shoe to complete her outfit.

Sammi grabbed black leather booties, walking to her bed “I’m gonna go out with Tommy and his new fiancee. Trying to be a nice sister,” Sammi said.

Amanda nodded, “Are Nikki and Vince going to be there?”

“Vince is going but it’s whatever,”

“Be careful,” said Amanda. Sammi stood up, reaching for her jacket that rested on the desk chair. “Remember what I told you, Sam.”

Sammi gave a forced smile, “how could I forget,” She put on her black jacket and grabbed the crossbody bag from the closet door handle.

“And do you like this fiancee of Tommy’s?” Amanda asked.

Sammi blew a raspberry, “No. She’s a fucking groupie, but I’m just going to try like I said,”

Right on cue, the doorbell rang echoed for Sammi. Sammi pushed past Amanda, walking downstairs to the front. Opening the door, Vince and Tommy stood outside with anticipation on their faces Tommy bounced on the balls of his feet while Vince kept his cool demeanor for Sammi. Sammi smiled at them, closing the door behind her.

She looked at the watch on her wrist, “Wow you guys got here on time. Impressive,”

Vince shrugged, “Just want to have peace and fun tonight,”

“Roxie’s waiting in the car. Come on, Sam” Tommy said, walking to where a dark blue four-door Cadillac parked horribly in front of Sammi’s place. Sammi didn't know where exactly this car had come from but knew to hold questions until the end. Vince held out his arm for Sammi like a gentleman, smirk still intact. Sammi only ignored Vince, walking straight to the Cadillac.

“Hey, Roxie,” Sammi said, sliding into the backseat of the car. Roxie turned slightly only giving a small, barely noticeable smile. “Hi.,” Roxie said, crossing her arms in the front seat looking out the window. Sammi only shook her head, turning to see Vince join in the back with her. He kept his distance as much as he could while also keeping his hands to himself. Sammi rested on the side of the door. She began to hope Vince’s words were correct.  

Tommy turned the keys to the ignition, “Let’s get the hell out of here!”

*

Just like a normal Saturday night in West Hollywood, the Sunset Strip was filled with nightlife down the whole strip. People could hear the muffled sounds of bands playing at different venues. The neon lights sign cast different colored glows on the street. The California air breezed through Sammi’s hair as the group walked up the street. Tommy and Roxie walked in front of the others, having his arm resting on Roxie’s neck. Sammi hugged her body as she only looked ahead of her, remaining silent. Vince kept giving side glances to Sammi as they walked closer to The Roxy, keeping his hand stuffed in his pockets.

The line for the club had roughly 10 people waiting, but not for Tommy and Vince. Tommy walked upright to the bouncer, getting access right away. Sammi scrunched her eyebrows together as the group walked up the short flight of stairs to the upstairs bar.

“We get treated like kings down here now, Sammi. Doesn’t it feel cool?” Vince whispered to Sammi.

“Great more things to add to your already big ass egos,” Sammi said coldly, sitting down on the bar top next to Roxie. Vince scuffed at Sammi’s remark, sitting down next to her facing his way to the brunette. Tommy grabbed the attention of the bartender, “Can I get a martini for the lady in black and a Budweiser?” The bartender nodded, looking at Sammi and Vince.

“Um… a whiskey sour and a single shot of whiskey,” Sammi said, taking off her jacket and crossing her legs.

“I’ll have the same as the Queen,” Vince said smiling politely at the bartender.

“You drink whiskey?” Roxie asked Sammi, fluffing her hair.

“Yeah, why?” Sammi asked, leaning back in the seat with crossed arms.

“Ladies don’t drink whiskey. That’s only for the men,” said Roxie, glaring at Sammi with an evil smirk. Sammi narrowed her eyes to Roxie, licking the corner of her lip. Tommy shot a look at Vince with wide eyes, praising the bartender for returning with their drinks.

“Can I get a shot too, my dude?” Tommy asked the bartender, getting exactly what he wished for.  Vince grabbed his small shot, raising it up to Sammi. Sammi looked at him for a moment, contemplating any of her actions.

“Cheers,” Sammi mumbled, clanking the glasses together and swinging the alcohol back.

“Me and Roxie are gonna go check out who’s on stage!” Tommy said, taking a hold of Roxie’s hand. Vince gave a nod in response, giving his full attention to Sammi. She looked away from Vince, eyes traveling to any part of the bar that hasn’t to her left. She sipped on her drink then looked at her nails for a moment. The tension was building up with no one thinking on how to end it. No one was having the balls to say a word to one another.

“Are you just gonna continue to ignore me until you stop feeling like it?” Vince asked, bending the thin straw between his fingers.

Sammi looked at Vince with scrunched eyebrows, “I think if I were to ignore you, I wouldn’t have come at all,”

Vince scuffed, “You only came for Tommy. If I asked you to come out tonight, you would’ve said no,”

Sammi scratched her head, “Guess you’re right about that,” she mumbled. Silence came back quickly again, Sammi asking for another drink. Vince chugging the rest of his like a shot, motioning for another one as well.

“You know I always worry about you right” Vince asked, gently tapping his index finger on Sammi’s leg.

She looked at his hand then back up at the blonde. “Shouldn’t it be the other way around? You do everything without thinking, don’t you?”

Vince shrugged, “Still doesn’t mean I’m not going to worry about you. I want you to be happy and live life.”

“I’m perfectly happy with my life, thank you very much,”

“Did Doc get a chance to talk to you?”

Sammi nodded, “I’m not going on tour with you guys no matter how much Tommy begs,”

Vince huffed, “Why not, Sam?”

“Same excuse as always. I have school and work,”

Vince shakes his head, “You’re barely going to be 20. College will always be there for you. And Doc is going to fucking pay you! Hell, I’ll be your sugar daddy and pay for your shit so you can come and quit!”

Sammi cracks into a smile, looking away at Vince as she tried to hold in a laugh. Vince chuckled as well, a smile growing from getting through to Sammi. Sammi looked at Vince, smile still visible.

“Just think about it a little bit more, okay? Sometimes you don’t have to always be responsible, Sammi,” Vince said, squeezing Sammi’s thigh.

“Okay, I’ll think about it,” Sammi said smiling weakly at Vince.

*

The four stumbled down the strip as 2 in the morning hit around. Bars were beginning to close while only the Denny’s and other diners started filling up with the intoxicated usuals. Sammi looped her arm around Vince’s, feeling the ground swing from side to side with every step. She noticed Tommy walking ahead of Roxie, seeing the groupie pout with her arms crossed. Sammi yawned, only wanting her bed in a short time.

“Your mom’s a cunt,” Roxie spat out with anger, holting from her spot. Sammi stopped in place, taking a moment to see if she heard right.

Tommy turned around frowning at Roxie, “The fuck? Why would you say that?”

“Because that’s what she is. She’s a cunt,” Roxie said again in a monotone voice, turning back at Sammi. “Your mom is a fucking cunt,”

Sammi pushed herself off Vince, stepping up to her “Who the fuck do you think you are?”

Vince pulled Sammi back gently, wrapping an arm around her “Sammi,”

“Quit it, okay? Let’s just get to the car already,” Tommy said, pulling Roxie by the arm with force.

“Why? And why did you even tell them about us? She has nothing to do with us getting married!” Roxie shouted, pushing Tommy.

“Sorry to break it to you sweetheart, but we actually have parents that give a shit about us. You probably don’t know what that's like,” Sammi said, having her mouth soon get covered by Vince. Roxie looked back at Sammi stepping to her face, as Sammi shoved Vince away from her.

“In that case, you must be just like your mom then. A cunt for a mom and a cunt for a sister,” said Roxie with a smirk. Sammi was only able to see red as she squeezed her fists tight beside her.

 Tommy yanked Roxie away from Sammi to face him, “Stop calling her that! And don’t ever call my sister that again? You hear me?” Tommy said through his teeth. Tommy began walking away right when Roxie pushed him almost to the ground. Vince held Sammi in his arms, knowing how bad everything could get.

“Fuck you! Fuck your sister! And fuck your mother!” Roxie yelled at Tommy, pointing her long manicured finger at him.

“That’s it, we’re leaving this fucking bitch here. Come on, Sammi!” Tommy said pushing Roxie away from him, trying to reach Sammi.

Roxie pushed Tommy once more making him stumble to the ground. “You are fucking spoiled little mama’s boy! ‘Cause you want to crawl back inside her cunt!” Roxie shouted down at Tommy. Then in a blink of an eye, Sammi and Vince saw Tommy spring up from the sidewalk, punching Roxie’s right in the mouth. Roxie fell to the ground, feeling blood drip from her mouth, looking up at everyone.

“Holy shit!” Sammi shouted, covered her mouth with wide eyes, looking at Roxie then to Tommy. Vince let go of Sammi, rushing to Tommy’s side to shake him up. Tommy stood frozen looking at what he just did. “I told you to stop saying that,” Tommy whispered, fully running away to the direction of the car.

“Tommy!” Vince shouted. He looked down at Roxie, who kept wiping away the blood from her mouth. Sammi stood still, beginning to feel her body tremble. She looked through her purse, pulling out a napkin. With a shaky hand, Sammi passed it to Roxie, only getting watery eyes in return. Vince grabbed Sammi by the hand, tugging her to Tommy. She stumbled away from Roxie, eyes glued onto her even as she disappeared into the distance.

“Where the fuck’s the car?” Vince said stopping under a street light. Sammi looked around, knowing they parked still.

“Oh my fucking god,” Sammi said running her hand through her hair, crouching down with her eyes closed. “He fucking ditched us,”

Vince huffed, kicking a nearby metal trash can. “Goddammit, Tommy. Sammi get up, we’re going to my place,” Vince said reaching out a hand for Sammi. Sammi looked up Vince, taking his hand as Vince tried to single a taxi.

*

Vince’s apartment was most certainly an upgrade from the Motley House, having everything look well kept for once. Shoes off with a beer in her hand, Sammi sat against the headboard of Vince’s bed with the singer right next to her. They tried multiple times to call Tommy but got no luck.

“Vince, I need to tell you something, and I’m gonna need you to never tell Tommy,” Sammi whispered looking at Vince. He nodded, wrinkling his eyebrows together.

“I caught Nikki fucking Roxie at the video shoot…” Sammi said softly, biting her lip.

Vince’s eyes grew in shock but then regained to normal size as he thought longer about it. “She would’ve tried it with any of us,” Vince mumbled, taking a sip of his beer. “Just didn’t think Nikki would actually fuck with Tom like that,”

Sammi took the last sip of her beer, “Never been more pissed in my life,”

“Just know I would never hurt your siblings or you like that,”

Sammi looked down at the bottle, pressing her lips together as she nodded.

“Hope you’re right about that,” Sammi said. Vince got up from the bed, pulling out a long t-shirt from his drawers.

“It may be late as fuck but you still need to sleep,” Vince said with a smile. Sammi only gave a forceful smile back at Vince, hoping for the best.

[tessimagines]

After All This (Bill Weasley x Reader) - Part 5.5

Minipart

Pairing: Bill Weasley x Moody!Reader

Summary: On Christmas Eve, (Y/N) decides it’s time to talk to Ron

You can find the series masterlist in my bio!

Warnings: angst but not too much.

Wordcount: 932

A/N: Hey guys! I would normally post a minipart and a full part in the same week but I’ve had a lot of study to do since I started back up at school. Hopefully, I will still be able to get chapters out weekly but we will have to see how everything works out around my school work. I’ve also started writing the first part of my new Peaky Blinders x Reader series so I will be taking whatever time I can to write both! If you’re interested in the Tommy x Reader series, feel free to get the link for the masterlist and summary in my bio :)

December 24th, 1997

You pulled the door of Shell Cottage’s master bedroom closed, the sound of Celestina Warbeck’s Christmas tunes floating up the staircase. Bill had her Christmas Eve special playing on the little radio by the windowsill, a little trick to make this Christmas a little more Weasley like. It hadn’t been a hard decision to stay home this year. Otherwise, Ron would have spent it all alone, more depressed than he usually found himself nowadays.

You could hear Bill moving around downstairs, making last-minute additions to the Christmas presents under the tree. The both of you had decorated it together at the start of December; the red, gold and white decorations bringing a little Christmas cheer to the little cottage you now lived in by the sea. Bill had been Christmas-crazy since he was a little kid, and even now at twenty-seven years of age, he was still the same present-obsessed little kid that he was.

“Hurry up, (Y/N)!” Bill called, excitement clear in his voice. “There are presents to be opened!”

“I’ll be down in a second!” Bill gave a large sigh, a laugh coming out along with it. You rolled your eyes at him and continued down the hallway until arriving at the room where Ron had been staying. You knocked on the door before slowly pushing it open.

Your eyes fell on Ron sitting on the bed in the dark room, The only light coming from the moonlight outside and the hallway just out the door. Ron sat staring at the wall in front of him, dark bags under his morose eyes. His gaze flickered up to you when you entered the room, the gloomy look on his face hardly shifting at the sight of the falling smile on your face.

“Hey, Ron,” You started, slowly taking steps over towards him. “Are you alright?”

Ron didn’t say anything for a moment as you took a seat beside him on the bed. Then he took a long, drawn-out breath in and began to speak, his gaze hardly shifting from the wall in front of the two of you.

“I haven’t slept in two days,” he spoke, the truth of his words evident all over his face. His skin was a very pale colour and he had deep, dark bags under his eyes. Often you would get up in the middle of the night and still hear him shifting around in his bed, his last actions towards his friends clearly on his mind.

“Have you ever thought that maybe it’s not too late to find them?” You said, testing the air between the two of you. He turned to look at your face with a sceptical look.

“It’s been two months, (Y/N),” he said, a slight hint of annoyance in his voice. “I have no idea where they’ll be.”

“You know what they’re doing. Shouldn’t that give you some clues?” Ron was still looking at you with a confused look on his face, not completely sure if you had lost your mind or not. “Plus, I think that you’ll find some way to find them again if you really want to.” You took another pause, the image of your father coming to your mind. He somehow always knew what to say in these situations. “There was something my father used to always say to me. Do your best and all else will follow.”

Ron’s gaze flickered down to a little metal cylinder he was fiddling with in his hands. His face changed as he looked at it, as though something had just hit him square in the face. He continued to look at it, thoughts running through his muddled yet slowly clearing mind.

“You’re too hard on yourself sometimes, Ron,” You said, reaching up to place a hand on his shoulder. His gaze flickered to yours once again. This time, however, his face was much softer.

“Thanks, (Y/N),” Ron said, a shy smile settling down across his lips. You wrapped your other arm around his shoulders, bringing him into a tight embrace against you. Ron accepted it, bringing his own arms to give you a large, brotherly hug.

“(Y/N)!” You heard Bill shout from the living room once again. You rolled your eyes and scoffed, flashing a smile at Ron.

“You’re brother’s obsessed with his presents, isn’t he?” You joked, waving at him to follow you in standing up.  Ron gave a slight chuckle and followed you out of the room. It was only then you realised the way that Ron may have taken your words and rushed to stop him before you went down the stairs.

“Do stay for Christmas, won’t you? Then you can go off doing whatever you’re going to do with those two.”

Ron smiled and nodded at you, his eyes much brighter than they were only moments ago. “Of course. I don’t think Harry and Hermione have the outstanding seasonal vocals of Celestina Warbeck and we all know there’s no Christmas without her.”

You laughed at him and motioned for him to follow you down the stairs. As soon as Bill saw you emerge into the living room, he beamed up at you.

“Finally!” He shouted, almost dragging your arm to sit down on the couch beside him. He plunked a large and messily wrapped present in your lap, so eager for you to open it. Reaching across, he planted a kiss to your lips.

“Merry Christmas, you two,” Bill sang, his eyes shining bright with Christmas spirit. Your gaze flickered to Ron next to the fireplace, your smile softening at the happy look on his face.

Alpha tags: @xinyourdreamsx @marvelismylifffe @xxerwin4laypxx @xxsophie-raabxx @yeeterbenjaminparker  @bitchinghourss @sly-vixen-up2nogood

Beta Tags: @winchestergirl907 @anormalgirlsthoughts @moondust-and-stardust @otherthingsinhead @kaetastic @themeanestlittlewitch @pixierox101 @semicharmedkindofali @struggleofyesterday @lazydiabetic @supermassiveblackhope @thelders @firekissedwitchbitch @thatwrestlingfan91 @wonderwoman292 @ohleahdarling @ffantasylandd @fallatyourfeet @riverdaleserpent-hoe @firstworldproblemthings @wandressfox @abbssssssssssss @izzy28901 @lvnalcvegocd @a-mexican-waffle @dreamleveille @ashleykaiba @midnightadventuressss @bitchytortilla @adozendreams @catseatursoul @janettarose @alsogolden-ana @kirra137 @floralhaze91 @buckybarnesthedoritoslut @mindy-franco @heavenanette @axielle-suson @caleybree0520 @sassyvetstudent @geek-girl7 @mxlisxylmz @ahirunana @captainsteverogers-68 @ginevraxrogers @can-i-say-something-please @isabellem20 @autumnrainwitch @caitlinannbarber @icharleecongrevemultifandomsblog @evelynpotter-lupin @peterparke-r @daddyslilchild @vyrei @wnygirl2012 @furryexpertstrawberry @lynn14lynn @death-of-the-golden-days @ms-lady-muffin @j-brielmalfoy @songforhema @grandmastergoldblums @galacticnerd-78 @theawkwardbutterfly @steph-fowlie @notearslefttocry218 @iluvmesomemarvelndc @expecto-patronadss @royarlie @winterboobear001 @good-or-naughty-girl @blog-ilove-thedoctor-forever @nea90sweetie @dreamingofnovember06 @theravenclawlover @sleepylunarwolf @awesomeowlbook @eponine-xx @sj-thefan @beatlezrcool @beardburnsupersoldiers @infinte-exist-ence @naffeesaa @fortunebucket @0-lost-in-stereo-0 @sweetlittlespine @w-wolfhxrd @the-unloved-person @kobraki2096 @hermionebennet @sansastarkjusticewarrior @miracleowlet @ceruleanrainblues @hermionebennet @loserrlauraa @mrsmoore-313 @dottirose @kpopmademedo-it @nat-arlett @kenz12234 @disneyoncerlover815 @bookfandomsmatter (A strike through means I cannot tag you)

If you would like to be added to the After All This Taglist, feel free to let me know in my inbox.

Let me know what you thought! I hope you’re all looking forward to the next chapter and I’m so sorry for the wait guys! I’m going to try to do my best to work it in around my study. Thanks so much for understanding!

~Tess~

[littlemeowmeowschimmy]

Coffee ‘Stache

credit: littlemeowmeowschimmy

Requests opened // m.list 

Genre: Cute // Fluff 

Summary: Would defiiiiinitely love something with a male reader? Literally anything!! But like no pressure! Neutral pronouns would do good too considering most your following is female reader soooo don’t wanna take that away jkwpsndjsk thanksss! (@piece-0-peace I hope this works for you deary :) ) 

Word Count: 1534

A/N: I have a lot of requests concerning reactions and don’t worry I am getting to them. Trust me you haven’t been forgotten about. Those take me a long time so I’m getting the solo requests out first okay? Enjoy~

»»————-　★　————-««

Falling into those chocolate colored eyes was easy, getting out, proved to be harder. Jimin had been your crush since grade school, and now you were sitting in front of him after so many years. You’d seen him grow up, change, and become someone you were very proud of. Yes, being his friend was enough to make you happy, but you wanted more. You craved for more, however you knew that because he was now a world wide artist, you couldn’t make your move. Not when there was so many other fans dying to be in the position you were in. 

Leading you back to fall deep into his warmth. Letting his eyes drain the life out of you, no matter how exaggerated that sounded, it was true. Something about Jimin’s charm, his presences, everything about him, turned you on. In good and bad ways. You could list the lonely nights you’d stayed up watching video after video, smiling because of how popular he had gotten. Not only that, but to see him doing well was always a nice feeling in your heart. However, there would be nights were it wasn’t just the warmth in your heart that was pulsing.

Bringing a hand up, you pushed your cheek into your palm. Moving yourself forwards, thus bringing you closer to Jimin. You could smell his cologne, the mixture of pine needles and something sweet made your heart pound. He was focused on stirring his coffee, so he wasn’t paying much attention to your wandering eyes. Since he broke eye contact, you were left to explore what was in front of you. Noting his perfect skin, that was soft to the touch, his plump lips, fluffy bleached hair, adorable nose, etc. Once again, you could feel those thoughts from early childhood pop in your head. 

It was difficult for you to completely erase what had happened. When you first met Jimin, he was a little punk. Like most elementary boys, they weren’t very kind to the “outsiders”. You grew up learning how to protect yourself, whilst making sure no one would see you cry. Landing you into many fist fights with him, and arguments. It lead into middle school until one day he had suddenly changed. It didn’t help that through all of the arguments and the fist fighting, you were attracted to him. 

No one really payed you much attention. You weren’t the type of person to be completely out there, nor would you ever change that. Instead, you’d preferred to keep to yourself, making you an easy target for bullying. The older you grew, the more your crush started to blossom. Since Jimin’s attitude and values had changed, so did his personality. The once little punk in elementary school had learned to be more kind and charismatic. 

He ended up apologizing to you and somehow became one of your friends. You weren’t as close to him as Taehyung would be in high school. Instead, you were just someone whom he talked to whenever he had the chance. Even inviting you out to grab a quick bite to eat. With that being said, you had kept in contact with him throughout the years. Even cheering for him when he debut in 2013 and supporting him as much as you possibly could. 

Because his schedule continued to get busier, it was harder for him to come back to Busan. It was hard in general, however you didn’t really mind much. Since you weren’t close, you weren’t going to force yourself upon him. Instead, checking in every once and awhile, and even going out for coffee when he offered it. Once again, landing you in the position you were now looking at him. When Jimin’s eyes rose, he locked with yours. 

In a moment of silence, you bit your bottom lip. Turning yourself away from him because you could feel the heat rising. Just like in elementary, you didn’t want others to see your emotions. You were known to be stone cold, but in reality, you were the exact opposite. Kind, warm, etc. You’d just learned how to control your emotions and show people what ones during the right times. School you often kept yourself as previously mentioned, so you never really “showed” off anything. 

“I’m writing a song Y/n,” Jimin starts, your interest perking. Moving yourself back, you crossed your legs at the knee. As in doing so, you brought your coffee back to your chest. Letting it rest right by your heart as it was still warm to the touch. Making your chest feel all warm and fuzzy inside, like it wasn’t already. 

“Oh really?” You tried to continue the conversation. He nods his head, closing his eyes for a brief second, then puffing his cheeks out. Making him look even more like a little cute ball of fluff. You had the urge to reach forwards and pinch his cheeks, but you knew that would be out of your line of comfort. It would be especially awkward, considering you assumed he didn’t think of you in the same way. 

“Yeah, it’s called Promise.” Jimin mentions bringing a hand up to rub the back of his neck. The then tilts his head a little, reaching forwards to grab his coffee. Then moving his head back and putting the cup up to his lips. Taking a small sip, you watched as a little white line of foam appeared above his lips. Instead of calling him out, you let it be. Wondering if he would pick up on it. “I originally started with something darker than what I have.” he continues forwards, pausing as he sets his glass down. 

Yup, you knew he wouldn’t notice it. Jimin wasn’t the type to automatically notice if he had something on his face. Not unless it was huge, like a chunk of food. You let out air through your nose, shaking your head. Jimin assumed that you were doing so to his response, but you were ultimately doing so because of his white mustache. “Namjoon helped with the English, and well it took me a little over this entire year to write it.” 

“When are you releasing it?” 

“In a couple of days. I’m a little nervous.” he answers wrapping his fingers around his glass. Sucking its warmth because it seemed like he was freezing, but in reality he really wasn’t. Jimin had on a black beanie, a jean jacket with a white undershirt, and some black pants. He wore boots like always, you assumed because he wanted to be taller, and a padded jacket for the cool winter air. 

“I’m sure you’ll do fine Jimin.” You answered moving your hand forwards to touch his briefly. There was a small bit of silence between the two. Jimin’s eyes locking with your hand, yours locking with his face. It was like there was a small connection, yet no one was making any moves. Instead of saying anything, you quickly remove your hand. Setting it back down in your lap, your eyes locking with your glass again. 

Jimin was pondering something, yet he wasn’t going to say it out loud. Instead, he decided to switch the conversation around. Asking you a few question since the last time he saw you was a year ago. You decided to let him in, telling him about your latest achievements. Most of which were getting a new job that paid well, and other small things. When the question of romance came, you went silent. 

He noticed this, but didn’t press on about it. Instead, he assumed that you were just waiting for the “lucky” partner. But you already wanted them, because they were right in front of you. Taking a deep breath, you pushed your now empty glass in front of you. Looking forwards at Jimin since he was discussing Bangtan’s achievements. Like you didn’t already know because you kept up with them.. 

When he was about to finish, his phone went off. You two looked at his screen, and he sighed. “It seems like I have to go.” he mentions grabbing his phone to stuff it into his pocket. Fumbling over yourself, you brought yourself up to give him a hug. Jimin wraps himself around you, pulling you close. His hugs were always warm and comforting. Yet, whenever he was leaving, they felt different. Distant and cold. You hated that you could only see him once or twice a year, but you didn’t have the guts to ask him out. 

You stayed quiet, letting your feelings be set aside because you certainly believed that he would find someone else. When Jimin pulled back, he glances at you. His eyes warm again, and you were lost in them. He reaches down to grab his jacket, looking around to make sure he had everything. Then, he takes a step back, giving you a small wave then bow before turning around. Just like that, you were alone..again. 

You watched as the only man you loved left you. Something about it was bittersweet; and yet, you couldn’t get eyes to leave. When you sat down it finally occurred to you.. 

Jimin hadn’t wiped his mustache....

Now that made you laugh. 

[killiantaylorua]

Chap 2 The Start Line, And a Skill Gap

Chap 2 The Start Line, And a Skill Gap

The Names Jaqueline Roberts, but I have already thought about my hero name. JaqRabbit. I used to tell my friends everyday, that I would be one of the best pros in America. Fame and fortune, and a large record of saving lives. Oh, my quirk, well technically i have two. Rabbit, all the gifts that entails, that includes super jump, incredible speed, exceptional hearing and smell, and finally powerful claws that aid in combat and digging, exceptional for those caught in mudslides. Thanks mom for an awesome quirk! My secondary quirk is JackHammer, my legs have a motor that vibrates up and down, striking the ground or whatever surface I am standing on and smashing it apart. However, if im not careful and I overuse the motor, I get the shakes in my legs. I cant move them till they stop moving from the recoil. Thanks Dad, for something. His quirk ended up pairing up with my rabbit quirk, providing my legs a passive boost that causes my jumps to shatter the surfaces i jump from unintentionally. Makes trying to be a QBall player very difficult.

What! You have never heard of QBall! So normal sports became hard to regulate, so a new one was created. Q ball, or Quirk ball, based around soccer, an indestructible ball is put in the middle of the field. The teams using their quirks have to get the ball from the center into the enemies net. The net is similar to a soccer net but with tough metal chains instead of the regular netting. You can do anything to get the ball into the other teams net, however, teleport quirks and others that are far beyond everyone else ability, blitz type runners specifically. You know, cause no one can stop because they are so fast. The teams are made up of a brute, one runner, two offenders, two defenders, and one net guardian. UA America has one of the best QBall teams, and i Intend on getting on that team. As well as become a hero. Wouldn't it be awesome if i became a hero and a Qball Athlete. I could do both!

The start of my dream though. It's the spring UA America Entrance Exam, which is today. I left my house in a hurry, excited and ready to begin an awesome adventure. I ran there and i came upon the opening gate. I walked forward headed toward the entrance. As I walked, I noticed two guys that made the news but i couldn't remember who they were.. One a shaved head, red skinned guy, covered in muscle wearing sneakers, a wife beater, and some khaki shorts. He had a big stupid grin as he stared at the entrance to the school.

“This School, think it'll be useful Corvus? Give us some experience we haven't seen in the field, haha?” His voice was slightly higher, he spoke with some cockiness, oozing with pride.

“Careful Thermite, this may bore you, but we could use the exposure. Imagine, if we showed how strong we are, we might get some interesting villains to hunt us.” This one was drastically different. A black turtleneck, black jeans, black socks, black sneakers, even a weird black mask covering the top half of his head. It gave his head a dome like appearance. He had a shy voice, but intelligence and curiosity seemed to sprout from his voice. Also hunger. He was also muscular but the turtleneck and jeans were a little big so his body was mostly hidden. He seemed to be much more humble. I tried to walk over to say hi and listen to their conversation, but…

“Ooh i'm so sorry!” I ran directly into the strangest person I have ever met. He wore a forest green hoodie, black gloves, blue jeans, white socks and some gray sneakers. He wore a mask that covered his entire head and seemed to go under his hoodie. It was black, skin tight and had a weird hypnotizing effect. When you moved it switched from black to crimson constantly, it was… calming.

“Oh, no, I'm so sorry, i… I didn't see you, just oh i'm nervous I didn't see you, I oh!” He had a kind voice, nervous, scared, high energy. Yet oddly, i dunno cute.

“No it’s alright, I walked in front of you, it's my fault.”

“Oh…” Suddenly he ran off. Way too terrified. I looked at my watch and nearly fainted. The orientation was about to begin. I ran into the building, following the signs to the orientation room. I made my way to the back of the room. And stared out over the crowds of people. The lights blacked out, and on a stage in the center of the room, a square of the stage fell out, and a man rose out. He was dressed in some nice brown slacks, shoes, socks, and a brown coat over a yellow button up with a crimson ascot. He wore a brown top hat, and a smile from ear to ear. He seemed to be constantly bouncing, spinning around on a solid brown cane with a mic on the top. Speakers came down from the ceiling, and screens with old timey black and white backgrounds came down. Swing music, played primarily by sax and jazz played through the room. Suddenly an old time radio voice, accompanied with what we thought was an old radio filter but was just his voice.

“Hello, hello, wannabe heroes! Welcome to the hardest test you will ever have. HaHa!”

Suddenly his voice changed, it went from jovial to serious. “Its been over 6 months since we lost the symbol of peace. So.. we altered the test! You will be fighting robots in different fake cities. Each robot has different points, except for one, the strongest, as it has 0! Get the most points and the top 40 of you will officially be added into our hero program. However a twist has been added. Normally we have something called rescue points and that usually is related to helping your fellow heroes, however, thanks to HUC or the Help us Company have volunteered to be some civilians. Simply bring them to the safe zones and you get your points. There is also a surprise, But I can't ruin My fun! HaHa!”

“In front of you cards have been given, they tell you what cities you will be battling at. We made sure to split you up, so you would have to team up with other heroes if you want to buddy up. Oh beforehand, you have a written test, but now the pressure of the fighting will disrupt you brains! Heroes have to be able to think with stressful situations! Have fun!”

We were ushered out to a similar room and had the written test. I gotta admit, i'm a very physical person, don't care much for education. But I did practice. After 6 hours, it was time for the combat. We were bused out to different cities. I got city E along with Thermite. As we approached the city, we saw huge concrete walls and an equally large door. It completely shielded the city from sight so we never got a good idea of what we were entering.

We hopped out of the bus and I limbered up. Gotta stretch before crushing some, and what the hell is happening? An explosion ripped through the walls of the city. As the smoke cleared, we saw a burning city and sidekicks of some of the Pros.. The sidekicks met us at the entrance, wearing numbers, points, wait.

“So trainees, there might have been a slight lie. Instead of robots, sidekicks will be your targets! And we begin in , 3, 2, 1! Sorry kids but this year is…”

Before he could finish Thermite jumped in. He was covered in flames, white flames! He swung out and the pro hero was sprawling on his back. Thermite was giving off so much heat that when he got close the sidekicks were burned and had to fall back to avoid 3rd degree burns. Thermite removed his flames, and put his foot on the sidekicks and they surrendered immediately. Thermite turned back to face the others.

“Ok heroes,” Thermite called. “Outta my way, if you get burned, know you idiots were warned. I'm gonna take down every villain i see. Time to show these sidekicks who the true best hero is! Now get Lost! He turned and ran into the city. It was at that moment The conversation he had earlier made more sense. He was cocky because he knew how good he was and had the strength to dominate the competition. Suddenly I remembered who he was. He was part of the duo of villain hunters in Anderson. Thermite and Corvus, captured 30 villains on their own. Corvus never takes credit, saying Thermite did everything, but Thermite gives him credit anyway, though no one knows why.

Two more Sidekicks came out, but known of us knew how to proceed. “They’re wearing weights, slowing them down, making them easier to defeat.” A powerful voice tore through the air coming from the back. A man wearing a suit with a Black vest, white button up with white gloves, black dress pants, and black dress socks, and black dress shoes. His eyes were a ruby red, he looked young, and highly analytical, though he seemed to be focused. Black metal started leaking from his mouth, before he suddenly through his head back. He opened his mouth and it coming pouring out covering his face, hands and shoes. It hardened looking like knights armor on those parts. Yet more poured out of his face, falling on the ground. It formed a battleaxe that he picked up and swung it at the heroes. 

“Let me eviscerate you!” He shouted. He moved with extreme speed and knocked the two sidekicks too the ground with the flat side of the battleaxe. They didn't get up absolutely terrified. 

“Surrender weakling heroes,” This man start laughing hysterically, insanely.

“If you weaklings are gonna stand out here, then I'm going to have so much fun,” He tried to regain his exposure. His voice Cracked, “Sorry, battle lets some, emotions out. Come on, let's clear this City.” He ran into the city, and I looked at the others. It was time to take the courage and step forward. I'm going to be on that Qball team, and a hero. Whatever. I run forward into the city ready for anything, or so i hope!

[yuvho]

would you hate me if i said answer all of them

anon who are you.....this is gonna be peak jobless behavior but let’s go I’m gonna try to answer as many as I can....... we going 🚀 short answers, you better read every single one anon

1. What is your middle name?

Don’t have one

2. How old are you?

18

3. When is your birthday?

November 13

4. What is your zodiac sign?

Scorpio

5. What is your favorite color?

Green

6. What’s your lucky number?

3

7. Do you have any pets?

No

8. Where are you from?

Turkey

9. How tall are you?

175cm

10. What shoe size are you?

39 in European shoe size

11. How many pairs of shoes do you own?

6

12. What was your last dream about?

I don’t remember my last dream but I recently had a nightmare where someone broke into my room from the window and tried to murder me

13. What talents do you have?

None

14. Are you psychic in any way?

I guessed the member announcement days of Magnum recently lmao that’s it

15. Favorite song?

Changes frequently but rn I’m enjoying Good to Me by Seventeen and Malamente by Rosalia

16. Favorite movie?

Monsters Inc.

17. Who would be your ideal partner?

Someone that knows when to have fun and when to be serious, has a sense of humor but is also a big softie (Park Jihoon of Magnum/Treasure13 hit me up pls)

18. Do you want children?

Not right now and probably not in the future

19. Do you want a church wedding?

No

20. Are you religious?

Not really

21. Have you ever been to the hospital?

Yup I’ve had a couple surgeries also my mom is a doctor I regularly hang out at the hospital

22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law?

Nope

23. Have you ever met any celebrities?

I once saw a Turkish actress and I met a really famous Iranian violinist

24. Baths or showers?

Ideally baths but I don’t have time so showers

25. What color socks are you wearing?

No socks on rn ._.

26. Have you ever been famous?

The peak of my fame was when I came up with the fandom name ‘dandelions’ for Park Jihoon of Magnum/Treasure13 other than that nah

27. Would you like to be a big celebrity?

Depends

28. What type of music do you like?

Literally everything and anything.....except for yeehaw country and screamo

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping?

Nope

30. How many pillows do you sleep with?

2 right now since I live in a dorm but back home 4

31. What position do you usually sleep in?

On my front & fetal

32. How big is your house?

Imagine one average university dorm room

33. What do you typically have for breakfast?

1 fruit & muffin

34. Have you ever fired a gun?

No

35. Have you ever tried archery?

Also no

36. Favorite clean word?

dazzling (to be honest I have no idea)

37. Favorite swear word?

that fuck word

38. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep?

I think it was a whole day??

39. Do you have any scars?

Yup

40. Have you ever had a secret admirer?

With this look and this personality?? No

41. Are you a good liar?

I guess

42. Are you a good judge of character?

Sometimes

43. Can you do any other accents other than your own?

Not really

44. Do you have a strong accent?

No I started learning English when I was really young and just have a flat no accented English speaking voice

45. What is your favorite accent?

???? haven’t really thought about it?? Australian???

46. What is your personality type?

I’m assuming this means like my mbti?? In that case it’s INFJ

47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing?

The dress I wore at my high school graduation - which cost like 120 Turkish Lira at the time

48. Can you curl your tongue?

Yes

49. Are you an innie or an outie?

Innie

50. Left or right handed?

Right

51. Are you scared of spiders?

No

52. Favorite food?

I love most foods

53. Favorite foreign food?

Really loving timbits since I’ve come to Canada

54. Are you a clean or messy person?

Clean-ish

55. Most used phrased?

I love __

56. Most used word?

???? idk

57. How long does it take for you to get ready?

45 mins - would take 30 if I managed to get out of bed right after I wake up

58. Do you have much of an ego?

lmao

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops?

suck

60. Do you talk to yourself?

Yes

61. Do you sing to yourself?

YES

62. Are you a good singer?

not really but my friends have said I have a nice voice

63. Biggest Fear?

Disappointing people I care about

64. Are you a gossip?

No

65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen?

There’s this Turkish movie called Mustang that made me bawl my eyes out

66. Do you like long or short hair?

Short

67. Can you name all 50 states of America?

No

68. Favorite school subject?

Answered this one already

69. Extrovert or Introvert?

Introvert

70. Have you ever been scuba diving?

No

71. What makes you nervous?

hoooo boy so many things

72. Are you scared of the dark?

Not really

73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes?

Depends on the mistake

74. Are you ticklish?

Yes

75. Have you ever started a rumor?

Don’t think so

76. Have you ever been in a position of authority?

Kinda?? I work as an English teacher lmao

77. Have you ever drank underage?

Nope haven’t drank ever

78. Have you ever done drugs?

No but living in a university dormitory in Canada where weed is legal I’ve inhaled so much second-hand weed smoke

79. Who was your first real crush?

Not sure if this was my first real crush or not but there was this kid in grade 7

80. How many piercings do you have?

One in each ear

81. Can you roll your Rs?

Yes

82. How fast can you type?

Pretty fast

83. How fast can you run?

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

84. What color is your hair?

brown

85. What color is your eyes?

brown

86. What are you allergic to?

nothing

87. Do you keep a journal?

yes

88. What do your parents do?

my mom is a professor/doctor and my dad is an engineer

89. Do you like your age?

yeah

90. What makes you angry?

people with egos and carelessness

91. Do you like your own name?

hell yeah

92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they?

I literally didn’t plan on making it to 18, children are not something I’ve thought about

93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child?

Dunno

94. What are you strengths?

also answered this one

95. What are your weaknesses?

0 confidence and this uglymentalilnessthatstartswiththeletterd

96. How did you get your name?

My mom is Iranian while my dad is Turkish so they wanted a name that was a name in both countries

97. Were your ancestors royalty?

Where can I get this information I don’t think so

98. Do you have any scars?

I thought this was asked already (yup it’s question 39)

99. Color of your bedspread?

the one I have at the dorm: white with orange flowers on it. the one at home: turquoise and white

100. Color of your room?

at the dorm: white walls. At home I have golden and light brown wallpaper it’s actually really pretty despite what it sounds like

ANON I CAN’T BELIEVE I REALLY DID THAT I HOPE YOU’RE SATISFIED AND THAT YOU READ ALL 100 ANSWERS