#03 ;; off anon asks

[the-intersex-experience]

Welcome to a blog dedicated to intersex experiences. We are bodily a mixed poc, disabled, tfemmasc intersex, system. You may call us Maichi or ᎠᏁᎶᏗ. liminal/liminals, xe/xem & 🩷/🩷s work for prns.

this blog is safe for: intersex tfems/tmascs/tfemmascs. intersex poc. intersex systems. disabled intersex people. good faith/mspec mono labels, palestine people, etc!

This blog isn't safe for: perisex afab tfems, perisex amab tmascs, perisex tfemmascs. terfs. pro.ship, rad.queer, winter.punk. racists, zionists. "transintersex" perisex people, and endo/demo/mixedgenic systems.

questions / conversations are fine, but be aware our stances/opinions are unlikely to change unless we accidentally do something problematic without realizing.

you can send things as "the intersex experience is", "the poc intersex experience is" etc. free to drop that part if you want to be more serious or vent/rant. please keep in mind all intersexism, harassment & hate will be blocked.

taken anon emojis: 🪻

other blogs to check out!! @our-transfeminine-experience , @our-transgender-experiences , @our-trans-youth-experience @our-transmasculine-experience

[ducknotinarow]

Raphael, perhaps the killer that took Bucks life is far closer than you think

| anon asks @aflockoffeathers [part one]

It all played out like some damn cliche you might seen in a crime show. Like the ones Raphael sometimes watched along with with Master Splinter. And, maybe that's why it annoyed him how it all seemed to play out. How it all came into place just then and there. On TV this would just be a moment to relax on the couch building up to best part but in this moment right now? Raphael couldn't express hoe he was feeling it was as if somehow or way this was his own fault his own doing. Something he said was what brought out this turn of events. Raphael was just so fucking convinced on this point. And worse?

"It don' make fuckin' sense." Is all he says to himself beneath his breath. Well he looked at the sight, it should be unsettling and it was don't get him wrong he wasn't heartless this wouldn't be any less so if it was anyone else. Anyone else they knew. Anyone else they didn't know. It would still not be a pleasant sight. But of course with their luck? It had to be someone they knew, someone they cared about, and befriended. For creatures who had to stay hidden away from a world they wanted to be part of but would never truly accept them? It was just nice to find the small select few who would. And now, one of them was dead.

And just as he thought it it was just as cliched as it may seem. They were on one of their runs just getting some fresh air at best but Don was in needed of some more parts. They thought about stopping by Casey's job to see about what he had and could spare to 'lose' but they had went to hit the dump first. In case they found anything of use for them there first. That's where it began when they ran into the professor, he was a bit worried about one of the men. Saying that they hadn't seen him for some time and ever since the Garbageman went on a spree to kidnap the homeless? Wasn't the first time a disappearance wasn't a tad odd. Of course Leo, being Leo offered they would keep an eye out for Buck. Raphael liked Buck, they were a tad older but a decent guy. But why did it have to be Buck?

Since they hadn't quite found what Don was in needed of they were going to make a stop at Casey's and that's when it all played out like some soap drama. Some blocks away from the shop Mikey caught sight of someone laying face down in an alleyway. At first just thinking they were someone who got drunk and passed out figured it would be nice to wake them up, when they screamed the others joined him. They found Buck, and as if the world was all working together to set the scene the dark clouds settling over the city rolled with thunder as rain started to trickle down into the streets. All stood gather around the sight. A number done on Buck's face. One Raphael would call kind, even with the winkles and over grown hair for his brows and facial hair. Always sort of reminded him of Splinter in that way. And Maybe that's why he took to Buck.

Of course, questions started to be raised and slowly answered. They all knew about the Killer going around for some time now. The one that seemed to keep evading the cops. But they had a well known MO, though one Raph once confided to to someone close and special to himself. That maybe they weren't wrong. Raphael felt like the world had slowed down as he simply stood, somehow he got tasked with Mikey, who was the most visbly upset over the find. Raphael couldn't tell you if Mikey came to him on his own though. Raphael felt out of it. Leo might have tried talking to him? but nothing seemed to come across nothing was phasing him in this moment. He only was aware of Mikey because they had their face hidden against his shoulder.

Was it Don or Leo who confirmed the information? All he knew was Buck was dead he been like that for some time. It was blunt to the head and face. It was a bit of a miracle they could still make out some of Buck facial features in the first place. Rain slowly grew heavier and it was all Raphael could hear now as the cool of the rain settled on his skin. Leo seemed to take what he said in a different meaning a display of kindness maybe towards Raphael that no it didn't make sense but death never dose. But that wasn't the issue for Raphael. They all knew who did this, well they sort of knew it was a hunch and if anything it was a push to make it involve them now. Because it was their friend who got killed this time.

And that is what didn't make sense.

"I dunno I haven' been followin' much on the story."

Maybe he should have been if it was going to lead to this.

" ike yeah the killin' may be over kill for some lousey street punks but at the same time? I dunno jus' it's just street thugs 'ight? Not 'ike cops do much to help. They go around and do a whole Lotta shit so people gotta be scared all the fuckin' time one less drug dealing, dragon might not be the worst thing ya know?"

It was as if every word he spoke that day was coming to bite him in the ass. But this wasn't some lousy street punk. This was a kind older man who didn't care the turtles were turtles, he treated them so kindly. So warmly. He patted the top of Raph's head once and laughed when he didn't pull away from the gesture. He never would be someone to be scared of even in his in fortunate state he never would think to harm someone for a cent. Buck would never sell any drugs. And he never wore that purple dragon marking. So than why? Why was Buck left like this? Life snuffed out left to lie in the cold dirty alley way. And for what?

Raphael couldn't help the pint in his stomach from twisting in his gut. A sharp painful shock to his system all because of what he said this is why. Raphael never should have spoke his thoughts at all he was so fucking convinced this is why it was Buck. Of all people it had to be Buck. A man who's eyes were curtained by his furry brows and nearly vanished when he smiled. He smiled a lot. What color were Bucks eyes? That was such an odd thing to focus on right then and there. Raphael let his eyes trailing over the damage. There was splinters of wood stuck in his skin. A wooden weapon did this. Raphael was focusing on that for a reason. Tracking any clue or sign he could, fucking rain washing away most things he could track this killer down with though. Don and Leo were talking as they looked at the body, Raph lifting his gaze trying to find anything else that might be enough.

All he saw was a faceless grey mutant, he ignored them he didn't care for that right now. There had to be something anything to give him a clue. There wasn't anything else to be seen, so his attention went back to the mutant. No one else seemed to notice it's presence. It was here for Raphael only.

Raphael, perhaps the killer that took Bucks life is far closer than you think

Closer? He didn't answer. He didn't need his brothers thinking he lost his mind, but luckily, it left. Letting him look back down to Buck. Watching the rain wash over his face, blood flowing down with every drop mixing in with the mud forming under him. If it was a wooden weapon, a lot of force had to be used. Someone strong, maybe. But either way that would mean Buck suffered a lot of pain. Did shock settle in? Or was he in pure agnoy till the blood loss did its job at last. Buck was made to suffer, Raphael felt his jagged nails plunging the plam of his hand.

Buck who joked about making boats outta junk to set sail and become a pirate on the high seas. That he made the turtle shis crew it was always just a joke but he would spin tails of the adventures they would have. Buck would never be aligned with the purple dragons.

Someone close. Was thar a hint on where he needed to start looking? Rapahel admitted it was thier problem they had no reason to be I vovled it why he wasn't following the story to closely. And if he had been then maybe Buck would had been alove now. It involved him now he was going to find out who did this who could do this to someone like Buck. But what would Raphael do from that point? Only time could tell. As he kept the sight of Bucks' current state in mind slowly, it erased the face he imaged before. And for that alone, he was going to put an end to this killer.

[akutasoda]

hotdog 🤯

Imagine Dazai with a reader who was once his friend before he became an executive, and left once he met chuuya. Only leaving a note claiming they had better things to do. Then when Dazai is in the ADA he sees them again and readers changed a lot and refused to speak to him. The only reason he gets is the past is in the past so stay there.

-🫛Anon!

better off in the past

synopsis - you decide a childhood friend should remain in your childhood

includes - dazai

warnings - gn!reader, angst no comfort, dazai's kinda scummy, wc - 2.6k

a/n: 🤯 - this is the new rewritten version as of 20/03!

taglist - @vi-chan07

you had met dazai when he was a scrawny boy that was around your age. you had caught a glimpse of him from the corner of your eye while you were out and the sight of him practically hunched over in an alley made you pity him. to you, he simply seemed like a child who had no friends and you were determined to change that.

sure his appearance was a little bit worse than it seemed from a distance - unkempt brown hair, bandages galore, and not to be rude but a rather weird taste in clothes, i mean what sort of child wore a full on suit - but you weren't to be deterred. you managed to slip away from any company you had and made your way over to the sketchy boy. some people may say you had absolutely zero spacial awareness but you had a feeling. he was a lonely child and you could sense no form of danger.

your cheery voice called out to him and he spun heel. it was a voice that really contrasted the cold, mocking words he'd hear on the day and so to say he was shocked would be accurate. he merely wished for a little while to himself. some time away from the horrors that awaited him back in the dreaded, looming building that was the port mafia base. sure an alleyway wasn't exactly a contrast but it was better than any stuffy room with the same brick. he didn't really expect anyone to notice him, or if they did they'd have more public awareness and choose not to disturb him. so seeing someone that willingly actually came and over to talk to him, left him surprised - he could've guessed if anyone did it would be a child that seemed to be his age maybe younger.

you would come to learn his off-putting appearance really wasn't a problem it was his off-putting attitude. when you first tried to introduce yourself or even get some kind of conversation out of the boy, you were just met with a cold hard silence as he stared you down. his gaze sort of made you feel small despite him seemingly being around the same age as you, maybe attempting to talk to him was a mistake. however if chhildren were known for one thing it would be a rather oblivious and joyfull nature which paired with you're unrelenting attitude would mean you eventually would earn a disinterested sigh and for the boy to finally stop glaring at you and ask you in a flat tone what you wanted.

you didn't really want to come off as rude, so in the nicest way possible you told him how you thought he looked so lonely and you wanted to change that.

dazai didn't take it as a nice senitiment. he instead took it as pity and he didn't want pity from someone like you. why you were so insistent on talking with him? it was now clear as day to him that you clearly had no sense of danger if you were talking to someone like him in an alley. he wanted to walk away anf leave, he truly had no business being with you but for some reason his body was betraying him. his legs stayed firmly rooted to the spot as you continued to try and strike conversation with him - to which he would eventually cave to. it wasn't much but to you it was an absolute triumph.

he would answer you witha few huffs or sighs and the most that you got out of him verbally was a command to leave him alone and after he spat those words out he finally got himself to turn and leave. you were slightly offended by his attitude but decided to not let it get the best of you, afterall he was a very weird boy in an alleyway - maybe it would've been weirder if he was nice. you decided then and there that if you ever saw him again you'd give him a piece of your mind. and you kept that promise. as not even a week later you found the strange boy and did exactly that. dazai still couldn't understand why he didn't just leave and instead still let you complain at him.

your second encounter with him wasn't much different from it's predecessor. you carried out a very one sided conversation with him - after you complained at him. and eventually he turned cold again, as if he was finally registering that he couldn't indulge in such encounters, before leaving. by the time you saw him a third time, it no longer seemed like a coincidental meeting as each time he was rooted to the exact same spot always looking like he was expecting you - if you ever brought any of that up he'd leave immediately but still show up again another time.

he reminded you of a stubborn cat, perhaps it would be too cruel to refer to the boy as a scrawy stray cat that took the affection he could tolerate before leaving again - now that you thought about you still didn't know his name. you had met him each week in the exact same spot about four times now and you still didn't know his name. it would be the fifth time, after you realised, where you finally pressed him for his name. he seemed hesitant to tell you at first but he very quickly said his name a bit quieter than you would've liked but you still caught it.

it was around the seventh meeting where you started designating him nicknames. you felt weirdly close to dazai after seven weeks of talking to him. sure if you told anyone else they probably would think he was some sort of imaginaring friend or be concerned that you were going insane and judge you but you could feel something between you and him. you knew very well it was one sided but you had hopes he too would eventually see you as a friend and make it less awkward for you - the same way all your conversations were practically one sided.

whenever you met with dazai, you'd tell him all about your day and any new ideas or thoughts you had/created. it may seem weird or a little bit crrepy that he liked listening to you but it made him feel normal. despite being roughly the same age you were so different to him. you lived a life of an actual child and you had a more nurturing upbringing than he had. so him hearing about your life made him imagine himself alongside it, he could imagine having the life you had and that made him feel happy.

he would listen diligently to your stories and day to day happenings and even made mental notes of anything that interested him so he could have a follow up next week. gradually, week by week he became less standoffish and eventually wouldn't always leave with a harsh tone. instead he started visibly lighting up if you called him your friend - much like a curious cat in your opinion.

and after experiencing almost all his harsh words and nature you still couldn't believe how he cut you off. dazai never told you about his life and you never really minded but you guess you probably should of taken that as a warning. you had no clue what kind of life he had and if anything by the fact you met him in an alley, it probably wasn't good. he didn't tell you he became a mafia executive and he had no plans on doing so, instead he planned to cut you off.

originally he just planned to disappear and so he started skipping weeks of seeing you but he really should've just stopped showing up. each and every time you saw him after a longer time of not seeing him, he would see the way your eyes visibly lit up and you always managed to coax him to stay and talk. but then he really started disappearing and became colder again, you hated it as he always dismissed any questions and it made you rather annoyed. you thought he'd atleast give you a reason but no, maybe that was too kind of an assumption. you felt bad about no longer being excited to see him but you always dismissed those feelings when you were reminded of how he now treated you.

so it didn't exactly surprise you when he stopped showing up. it had been atleast a month and you finally accepted you wouldn't see him again. it saddened you but you tried to not let it get to you especially after finding the note. you originally glossed over the scrumpled ball of paper on the floor where he normally stood, mere trash was all you thought it was but when you accidentally kicked it you saw splotches of ink and felt compelled to open it up.

you weren't surprised by it's contents in any way shape or form, if anything it stung slightly and made a bitter anger bubble inside of you. he clearly hadn't put a single thought into it and probably only did it as some sort of final show of how little the time he spent with you ment to him. the scrumpled piece of papersome tears in some places and had lazy, half finsihed strokes of ink on it that barely made out the message -

'don't look for me, my time is precious and needed somewhere more important and necessary'

and at the bottom was a scribble with a million lines through it. the name clearly crossed out but you knew. you thought you atleast deserved the decency of a signed note. sure it hurt you but if you were being honest you tried preparing yourself for this ever since he started not showing up.

dazai had always been half torn between writing you that note or actually having the confidence to face you in person and tell you. unfortunately, his deciding factor was chuuya. to him chuuya was much more useful to him, someone he saw himself actually getting along with instead of you - the lowly civillian that somehow managed to keep him meeting up with you. and so eventually he felt barely any remorse for not saying goodbye properly and he even considered scrapping the note but he thought you deserved some kind of finalality - he reckoned you'd still wait for him otherwise. and while he spent a lot of his time on missions with chuuya, his mind would still sometimes drift to you but never for too long. he didn't care that much. right?

you hadn't seen dazai for the rest of your childhood. you eventually came to not care in the slightest, some childhood friends leave along the way and that was inevitable and so you didn't think about what you could've done for him to change on you so suddenly. instead you focused on everyone and everything else in your life that actually made you feel happy. however your word's would contradict yourself when you still held onto the note. you didn't know why and you never thought about it too much.

however what you hadn't known was that dazai had come a long way and actually grew as a person. he would openly admit to himself that he wasn't exactly a welcoming or polite child, he was a menace who hurt those around him - fitting for the 'demon prodigy'. he could blame the mafia all he wabted but he knew it all come down to him at the end of the day.

his time in hiding after leaving the mafia did give him time to reflect on the people he hurt as a child. from those he didn't even know the names of, to those that he was actually close to. he was fully aware of his actions and it pained him knowing it toom the death of a very, very dear friend for him to realise this. how many people would he have to lose to become a better person? he still held very brief memories of you but only negative ones. he could remember how harsh he was, how dismissive he was of you, all because he didn't want to admit he enjoyed your presence.

somewhere along the line he would start to wonder if you'd ever get the chance to meet him now. working at the agency had made him realise many things and he was confident he was only going to keep growing as a better person. sure he was still far from perfect but atleast the him now wouldn't be as scummy and cowardly to leave a rather harsh note to stop you talking to him because he found someone else - he realises now you weren't some means of disposable company. if you had seen how much he had grown would you wantbto talk to him again? was it too out there for him to wish that he could make it right, to apologise properly? and the answer would be yes.

you still lived in yokohama and part of you used to worry about meeting dazai randomly in the streets but now you realise how silly that was. you never actually ever saw him after you found that letter, it was really like he vanished into thin air. he thought it was the luckiest day of his life when he spotted you in the distance. you obviously had grown older and looked slightly different but he could tell it was you and he wasn't going to let this chance go.

you felt the opposite. you thought it was the worst day when you heard someone call out to you just to turn around and see it was dazai. rather ironic in your eyes. again, obviously older but how could you really forget those brown locks and he still adorned bandages - less but still. after all these years you finally came face to face with the man who, as a child, was rather ruthless in cutting you off. not having the deceny to make it a smooth let down and you really couldn't imagine that kind of denial from someone that young.

you could tell he had a lot to say and based on his opening sentence you knew it would be an apology. unfortunately for him you didn't want an apology. you were over him as a friend and you didn't want to go back to being friends after all these years. some may call you petty but you thought it was justified. but he couldn't tell and all he could think about was finally telling you how much he thought about you lately, how much he felt he wronged you and if you would ever consider befriending him- your voice broke his thoughts and words. you told him point blank you didn't care anymore and he shouldn't either. it was time for him to let go aswell and realise you should stay in his murky past.

you wouldn't let the dejected look ln his face trick you as you simply told him that the past was the past and that was where he would stay. you advised him to do the same. it would be rather unhealthy for the both of you to continue a friendship from all those years ago that went so wrong. it didn't matter to you how much he changed and now you just wanted to get along with your life.

for the first time in ages, dazai really couldn't understand. after all these years he finally had the chance to set things right but he now knew that was too much to ask for. now he had to watch you walk away from him like he did to you all those years ago. except you had the decency to actually tell him in person.

[christinarowie332]

you coming over or what ?

matt sturniolo x reader

angst to fluff .

warnings: language, that’s all really !! just smooching

requested: kinda , anon wanted more matt , more angst and more fluff , thank you anon

————————-

i have allways been a push over . well . not really . i just find the good in people , and that’s all i see .i get blinded by a small compliment , a small gesture , a shift in their attitude , and i run with it . i use it as fuel to run the fire that is a toxic and dangerous relationship. the fire ends up consuming me , engulfing the small embers of my heart that still somehow burns . eventually the fire burnt out , leaving ash . leaving a cold and hollow hole like a cigarette had created it .the only red and orange hues that still slowly burn in my chest is anger . hate . for one man and one man only .

matthew sturniolo .

i look down to the phone placed on my lap , neck muscles pulling at the sudden movement, a cold rush sent through ligaments as they have not been used in a while .my eyes have been glued to the tv for the past hour or so , only movement has been looking for my disgarded vape , or to trail a misplaced shadow , wondering if it’s a ghost ,my fucking anemia or lack of sleep fucking with my brain.

my eyes travel across the phone screen .

““matthew bernard sturniolo” sent you a message”

oh fuck off

i grab my phone from my thighs , sitting up straight and open the i message notification.

what?

my eyebrows furrow at this . a thousand thoughts fill my mind . i ignore the one that says go , i ignore the one that says you know how u feel , i ignore them all . the only one i pick apart , type out , and send , reading this;

me: the fuck u texting me for ??

matt: who’s this ?

me: u sent the message fuck ass??? soph???

matt: oh

me: oh ???

matt: wrong sophie mb

me: k

i roll my eyes and close my phone . my attention should be on my tv again , that’s where i’m looking . i’m looking at a scene i’ve watched multiple times , this being the 100th time i’ve watched the originals . my attention should be on the man on my screen. but it’s not . who the fuck is sophie ? why the fuck did he ask her to come over ? he knows another sophie ?

before my mind can react , my hand is on my phone . my thumbs jumping from each letter , playing hopscotch with my future . i don’t care . i really don’t , i’m just intrigued is all . that’s what i tell my self . no . that’s the truth .

me: k read 8:03

me: who’s sophie ?

i’m not quite sure when i started to hate matt . i mean we were never friends, i met chris first , then i met nick . i became friends with them , then naturally met matt . he had a girlfriend at the time , a stupid annoying stuck up bitch who allways had it out for me . bitch . so naturally i stayed away from him , and never really got to know him other then as nick and chris’s brother , matt didn’t try and talk to me so it became kinda awkward. then the awkward became “why is she/he here” and “why don’t they like me” and “fine i just won’t like him” . even his face pisses me off , the annoying blue eyes , the bags , the chiseled cheekbones , his lips . not in a weird way . he just never shuts the fuck up so of course i’m looking at his lips . what else am i gonna look at ? his hands ? the annoying ass rings he wears ??? his tattoos ….. i mean yeah i like tattoos but why does he have them ? and don’t get me started on the-

a ping from my phone snaps me from my thoughts .

matt: don’t worry about it .

god he’s pathetic.

me: what is she your new girlfriend…. couldn’t get me so pick the next best sophie .

matt: fuck off

i chuckle at myself, smiling at the messages . before i see a text bubble appearing .

matt: you coming over or what ?

…

my heart starts to quicken along with the pace of my thoughts . why the fuck does he want me to come over ? i weigh the pros and cons in my head , i go through the different scenarios , i even practice what i’m gonna say , what arguments i have for him . in all of these i’m left confused and intrigued .

if curiosity killed the cat , this pussy is fucked.

i don’t give myself a second to back out , grabbing my phone , letting him know i’m on my way , grabbing my keys and before i know it i’m pulling out of my driveway and halfway to his house .

the drive is a short one usually , more often then not it’s an excited and happy drive , knowing i get to see my two best friends .and i get to argue with matt . but this one is different, my hands are gripping my wheel , depriving my fingertips of blood as my palms strangle the warm leather . my eyes dart across the road , to my mirror , to the map , showing me in perfectly placed pictures the destination of my mistake .the road mocks me with the traffic lights i pass . each time it counts down to red , illuminating a big “game over”, taunting me with its game . within seconds , i’m putting my car in neutral . within a few more im out side of his door , knuckles hovering over the wood.

two knocks.

three seconds

“hey”

his hair is messy , eyes are heavy and his face is a dead and emotionless one. i exhaile a breath . pulling myself together and barge past him , shoulders colliding, knocking him back a step .

“nice to see you too” he continues, before slamming the door and turning towards me .

“why am i here matt .” i ask , defeat and impatience laced in my voice , crossing my arms .

“you literally drove your self here? you tell me” matt replies , walking past me , towards his living room and dropping his body onto the couch. i scoff and turn to walk towards him , slumping in the spot farthest away from him on the creme sofa .

“you quite literally asked me to come” i finally replied,he smirks slightly and turns his head towards me , eyes still on the tv before he meets my eyes .

“wow . i ask , you come ? that easy ? man you must be obsessed with me” he condescends , leaning forward and looking me up and down.

i huff a breath from my nose and raise my eyebrows , before grabbing a pillow and covering my body , feeling naked infront of him.

“oh please , the only reason i’m here is pure intrigue, just because i share a name with your little slut doesn’t mean i’ll let you-“

“who the fuck are you talking about” he cuts me off , pure confusion and disgust painted across his features .

“sophie ??? the girl you were meant to text ??” i ask before leaning back and looking around dramatically “ is she here ??? do i get to meet her , SOPHIEEEE , WHERE ARE YOUUUU-”

a hand cups my mouth and cuts me off , i turn around to see the boy attached to it leaning over me , inches away from my face . my heart quickens slightly before i feel my ears heat up , my breathing under his palm becoming more harsher .

“chris and nick are asleep right now , shut the fuck up” matt says in a slight whisper, his now wide eyes darting between mine rapidly , then falling to his hand over my mouth and removing it before speaking.”sorry ….. i don’t want them waking up , especially if you’re here”

i’m speechless for an embarrassingly long time , my hurried breaths fanning his hair at the closeness . he notices this and moves back , still sat near me . we sit in awkward tension for a while before he speaks up again.

“there isn’t another sophie”

what

“what?” my head whips towards him , eyebrows furrowed , his eyes meet mine , surprisingly soft features gleaming in the dim lighting from the floor lamp and kitchen light .

unbeknownst to her , the words meant more then she knew . she is the only sophie . the only girl that ever occupies his mind . his sophie . it doesn’t matter that she hates him . she hates him. there was no one else for him .

“u literally said “the fuck you texting me for” what else was i supposed to say . “oh i want to hang out ? we haven’t seen each other in a while !! yeah you hate me but i’m sure u wanna spend time with me alone” he mocks me , using air quotes and talking with his hands . i smile at him for a second before realizing i was and dropping it immediately.

“ ok …. why the fuck do u want to hang out with me ? you also hate me ? right?” i reply, genuinely, we have spent a year and a half being horrible to each other . i’m met with silence, his eyes fall to the couch cushions , eyebrows curled downward matching his perplexed expression. “matt i don’t understand you ? what do u mean you want-“

i’m cut off as he heaves forward and collides our lips , his hands grab my face holding it close to his. my eyes widen and i think a million things. none of the scenarios never prepared me for this . none of the conversations ended with this . and i cannot argue with him on this. i move with him and relax in his hold , my hands cover his on my face , before moving one to the back of his neck pulling him impossibly closer. the years of using our tongues as knifes , battling in heated arguments, cutting each other apart with the wielding of words prepared us for this . we lay down our swords and use our tongues in perfect harmony. our kiss like a puzzle peice finally fitting together . a dance perfectly paced .

i pull away first , the bewilderment finally hitting me . all this time ? he felt it .

“i didn’t mean , a single word i said . do you know how it felt, to be around you , knowing that i was completely ,and irrevocably in love with you.” he pants out each phrase, the breath he held to kiss me finally filling his lungs. “i was with her , and loved you , she knew soph , she knew i loved you before i did . i made you hate me because i couldn’t love you and be with her , i couldn’t be around you because all i wanted to do was kiss you . all i ever wanted was you . then when i could love you …. when i finally broke up with her …. you still hated me . i’m so sorry i’m sorry im-“

i cut him off now , reattaching our swollen lips , i desperately kiss him , needing him to know more then anything that i understand. “matt” i pull away and grab his face now , forcing him to look at me , forcing him to understand. “i have never hated you , not really. i hated when i couldn’t have u , i hated when i couldn’t hold u , i hated when i couldn’t love you .god i love you matt , allways have” i breathlessly ramble out , the months of pretending finally being lifted from my shoulders, relaxing as he pulls them towards him , wrapping his arms around me and holding me close.

in his arms i feel myself drift off , hearing his rapid heartbeat slowly dying down , my head rising and falling on his chest as he takes in his breath . we’re both aware of the conversation to be had in the morning. and of the explanation to his brothers when they find two people that spend their time sending death threats each others way , wrapped together in each others limbs . but the comfort and warmth of the room and each others body’s is enough to will us both asleep .

still kinda hate him tho .

—————-

🤍🍼

what a little bitch bro being all cute and shit . (can this be us matty poo 🥺🥺🥰🥰❤️❤️❤️)

kinda hate this . felt like the angst wasn’t angsty enough. next time i’ll make someone cry but i wanted sophie to also be the problem and also be a bitch 😇

love ya !!!!

tag list :

@mangosrar @soursturniolo @strniohoeee @azkabanstar @daddyslilchickenfingers @kenzieiskoolaid @kvtie444 @luvsturniolo @lustfulslxt @littlebookworm803 @lovingsturniolo @deatthmatch @sturnphilia @biimpanicking @bluesturniolo333 @parkerssecrets @urmyslxt

[acewritesfics]

Past Love: Part 02 | Tommy Shelby

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Reader

Request: From Anon

Fic Type: Imagine

Prompt: "We can’t keep doing this." 

Warnings: Angst, Angst and more angst, swearing, goodbye kiss. Formally titled Goodbye, Tommy.

Word Count: 1,225

PART 01 | PART 03

TOMMY SHELBY MASTERLIST || TAG LIST SIGN-UP

"How long have we known each other?" Y/N asks Tommy as they sit alone in the Garrison, him on one side of the table and her on the other. The distance between them wasn't wide enough for her liking. It takes all her physical and mental strength not to stand up and walk to his side of the table. 

Her body is turned slightly towards the exit in case she needs to make a hasty exit, one of her elbow's rests on the table, a cigarette hanging from her hand while the other cradles the glass of whiskey he just poured for her. Her eyes are filled with worry for the man she was supposed to marry, before Lizzy, before Grace.  

"Our whole fucking lives," he says, leaned back in his seat, his hands in his pockets knowing that's the only way he'll be able to keep his hands to himself and looking at her with sad eyes. 

Lizzy had left allowed the two to talk after inviting Y/N to have dinner with them later. Y/N didn't want to intrude more than she already was but the look on Tommy's face let her know she couldn't deny her invite. Instead, she told Tommy's new wife that she'll think about it. Lizzy had hugged her, whispering her thanks before leaving.  

They had spent the last hour talking through the mess Tommy had gotten himself into this time. She helped him work out some solutions and made him give her his word that he will start taking care of himself again, if not for himself or Lizzy then for his children. They deserve to have a better father than they ever had. 

"Maybe that's why we can't seem let each other go," she mumbles more to herself as she brings the cigarette to her lips, inhaling the nicotine before, blowing the smoke out the side of her slightly parted lips.  

Tommy's head bows in agreement, having heard her words loud and clear.  

She flicks some of the ash from her cigarette into the ashtray in the middle of the table. "But that's not why I'm here." 

"Lizzy called you," he says with a roll of his eyes. "I told her not to bother you." 

"She made it sound like you didn't know she was calling me," she says remembering back to the brief conversation she had with Lizzy over the telephone a couple days ago. 

"She promised me she wouldn't," he says. "I took her word for it." 

"She's worried about you, Tommy," she tells him, swallowing the lump that's formed in her throat. "Whether you want to believe it or not, she cares for you. I would even go so far as to say she loves you." 

"Do you love me?" he asks, ignoring everything else she said. It was all that mattered to him in this moment. Not everything bad that was happening, not Lizzy, not his marriage. All that mattered was her and the light she was shining on him. Seeing her again, gave him hope, something good to hold on to that hasn't been tainted by his latest bout of impulsiveness.  

"That doesn't matter," she says finishing her whiskey and stubs out her cigarette as she stands up. She couldn't keep doing this with him. Just like when she stepped through that door earlier, she knew it was a mistake to be here. She lifts her coat off the back of the chair and slips her arms inside the sleeves. "Let Lizzy know I'm sorry that I won't be able to attend dinner and to not call me again. It goes for the both of you." 

"Y/N."  

With her back turned to him, she hears the pain and sadness in Tommy's voice along with the scraping of the chair against the floor as its pushed back letting her know that he's now standing. 

"We can’t keep doing this," her voice is quiet and strained, the lump in her throat getting larger and making it difficult to hold back the sob forming in her chest as she reaches for the door handle. 

"Do you love me?" he repeats his question stopping her from opening the door. 

She turns to face him with tears in her eyes. "You know that I do, Tom. I've never stopped loving you." 

"Then stay," he tells her, his voice cracking. 

"I can't," she says barely above a whisper as he moves towards her. He stops in front of her, standing toe to toe with her. Placing her hands against his chest as if they are a barrier between their hearts, she can't bring herself to look at him feeling the tears building up in her eyes. "After today we need-" 

She's cut off by him titling her head up and slamming his lips on to hers. Knowing that she should pull away, she can't bring herself to do so as her hands move to his shoulder and the back of his neck as his go around her waist, pulling her flush against him.  

The moment his lips touched hers, she was transported back to before the war and the last time he had kissed her like this. He had snuck her into the stables at Charlie Strong's yard. He had set up a picnic and proposed to her later that night. They hadn't made it back home that night and Charlie had the shock of his life finding them the next morning, curled up together, naked, under the blanket Tommy had brought with him to keep them warm.  

As reality catches up to her, she pulls away from him. His fingers dig deeper into her sides, not wanting to let her go just yet.  

"I love you," he says out loud for the first time in years, trying to catch his breath. His own tears threatening to fall. 

"I love you too, Tommy," she returns his sentiment, her hands moving to caress his cheeks. "A part of me always will. But this needs to end. You have a wonderful wife and she needs you more than I do." 

"I don't love her," he says softly.  

"There is a part of you that does," a faint smile makes its way on to her lips. "Whether it's as a friend, a lover, the mother and stepmother of your children or all three. There is a part of you that loves her. No matter how small, you need to build on that." 

"I love you," he repeats not knowing what else to say. 

Her smile grows a little as she pulls him in for another kiss, this one much softer and filled with love. But this time there is a sadness to it, knowing this kiss isn't coming from a place of two past lovers coming back together to rekindle what they once had.  

Ending the kiss, Tommy rests his forehead against her for a moment, his eyes remaining closed before pressing a kiss to her head. She kisses his cheek before stepping back from him and reaching for the door handle. She twists the knob opening the door before looking at him once more.  

"Goodbye, Tommy." 

With those two words, she slips through the doorway, her hand covering her mouth as she lets go of the sobs she's been holding and the tears flooding her eyes spill over onto her cheeks. 

TAGGED: @chapter-in-my-old-diary - @hanawrites404 - goblinjnr - @halsteadbrasil - @forgottenpeakywriter - star-ggirl - @iceman-kazansky - @alexxavicry - @galactict3a - @crispynutella - @il0vebeingdelulu - @nicole-19s-world

Bold means your @ didn't come up when I tried to tag you. Here's a post I found that could help if your not able to be tagged: WHY OTHERS CAN'T TAG YOUR BLOG

Sometimes your blog will be linked after posted but I don't think you get the notification. Tags have been weird lately. I might start putting the tags in the comments. Let me know if you get the notification.

[intersectionalpraxis]

hey im sorry if you already answered this and i don’t mean to antagonize you, but out of curiosity: why do you tag your Palestine posts with feminism? i don’t want to come off as rude but it did kind of confuse me at first

It's no worries at all, I have addressed this a handful of times, and another person asked me, and I answered. The anon question is deep in my page, so I'll share some posts I've spoken about why more feminists need to be talking about Gaza below, and address why not talking about this as a feminist issue is problematic.

The fight to dismantle power structures and institutions doesn't end at the patriarchy, but when there is an end to white supremacy, capitalism, and western imperialism, among other axises of oppression.

Strides and fights to liberation shouldn't be cherry-picked (we see this predominantly in white feminism -who only act when it personally effects them). And at the most technical level, women's experiences are intersectional and extend beyond just liberation from gender norms and expectations -yes, it is at the core of feminist discourse, to shatter ceilings and demand equity across the board, but that also includes the intersections -race, class status, disability, sexuality, religion, ethnicity, among many other aspects of our identities.

Women and children are also disproportionately impacted and killed by IOF terrorism. They are targeted purposely, and I addressed this in some of the posts below. An IOF official liked a post that said Palestinian women part of the 'Hamas infrastructure' and said they must be 'dealt' with via their deaths. Pregnant Palestinian women are being left without care during their trimesters, and tens of thousands of them have zero to inadequate care; and many are miscarrying. There is also a period care shortage, and many Palestinians have resorted to using cloths. Which overall the lack of access can cause health ramifications in the future.

So this is why ALL my posts are tagged with feminist and feminism. Especially when the IOF regularly uses 'don't the feminists of the world care that Hamas is raping Israeli women' in their propoganda videos and campaigns in order to spread misinformation and weaponize women's and feminist liberation movements to excuse their genocide of Palestinian people.

We should also not forget about the rampant sexual violence Palestinian women and children have and continue to experience by abusive, predatory rapists among the IOF soldiers, both past and present. Especially in the prisons' systems. I talk about this a lot on my page. So much of what I included below is only a fraction of what I have spoken about. My bottom line is if you're a feminist who talks about "women's liberation" and that doesn't include ALL women being systematically oppressed by settler/imperial/colonial forces, and you're especially not critical of your governments being complicit or funding a genocide, don't call yourself a feminist.

I hope this offers some clarity.

[dandylovesturtles]

This one is breaking the rules but aaaauuugh they're both really good prompts so I will do April and Raph Trick, just for you anon

(and answering this as a screenshot in case I ever want to write that other prompt too lol)

CWs: none really, other than some brief discussion of injuries from the fic

---

April's on a jet ski with Warren Stone when a very loud and repetitive sound comes from a fog horn in the sky. It takes her a moment to realize the sound is her ringtone, and it's actually coming from her bedstand. Blearily she blinks open her eyes and rolls over, fumbling until she finally grabs it and stares at the screen.

5:03 AM is what she sees first, and she prepares herself to verbally murder whoever is on the other end of the line, until she actually pays attention to the caller ID and accompanying picture.

Raph. An old picture of him making a silly face for the camera.

She's suddenly wide awake. Raph would never wake her up so early on a school morning for no reason. Which means something's happened.

She swipes to answer before the ringtone dies, nearly yanking her charger out of the wall with how fast she raises the phone to her ear.

"Hello?"

"Um, hey, April..." His voice sounds hesitant, and April's suspicions are confirmed. "Sorry for calling so early, I just... wanted to catch you before you went to class."

"It's fine, big guy," she says, because it's Raph, and because his tone is screaming that something is wrong, bad wrong, and she could never be mad at him for calling her at any time when something is wrong. "What's up?"

"It's, uh... well. Something happened. It's... I don't even know where to start."

He's not telling her to meet them somewhere, so whatever happened isn't currently still occurring. April decides, then, to cut to the chase.

"Who's hurt?"

She hears Raph take a shaky breath, hears what sounds like a thud as he leans heavy against a wall. Then...

"Leo."

Blood turns to ice in her veins. She sets up fully in bed, pulling her legs to her chest and closing her eyes. Not again.

"What stunt did he pull this time?" she asks, but there's no heat to it, just the echoes of the distress she's barely holding back. Raph, at least, seems to understand.

"We don't know. We were chasing these yokai guys - there were three of 'em, so we split up. Leo chased one of 'em up onto the rooftops, and... uh..." Raph clears his throat. "We think... well, Donnie thinks he fell. Or was... maybe pushed."

Fell off a roof. April almost feels like she heard wrong, it feels impossibly mundane. Those boys have been running around on rooftops since before she knew them, and their shells are tough; she can't imagine any of them being too hurt by a tumble unless it was from really high up.

But she can tell from Raph's tone of voice that Leo was hurt - seriously. If this were a, "Haha, Leo fell and broke his leg," moment, she would have gotten that call from the boy himself.

She keeps her eyes closed, like that will somehow force reality away. Predictably, it doesn't work. "How bad is it?"

Raph takes too long to answer, and she fists her hand in the sheets while she waits.

"He's, uh... Well, he's breathing right now," he says, quickly, and she sucks in air too sharp and fast, "but he wasn't when we found him. And... I... I don't know, April."

April listens helplessly as Raph's voice cracks on the other end of the line. She wishes they were having this conversation in person, so she could give him the biggest hug she can manage, but that's not how life is.

"He's... he's not waking up. He's just... laying there. He looks so still, he... Even after the Krang, he never..."

Raph chokes up, and she can tell he's trying hard not to cry. She wonders if he's let himself break down yet, and thinks probably not, because he probably hasn't left Leo's side until now, which means he's stayed strong for Donnie and Mikey.

But Raph doesn't have to stay strong for her. She's the big sister, after all.

"It's okay, Raph," she says, her own tears starting to fall, her own voice shaky, but she only lets as much show as she needs, to encourage Raph in his own feelings. "It's okay. I'm here."

There's another thump from the other side of the line, Raph hitting the floor, if she had to guess, followed by one sob, and then another. And then she can hear him crying in earnest, and she lets him, repeating the same things over and over, I'm here, it's okay, let it out, I love you, we'll figure it out.

Later, April will get a shopping list of anything the boys need from Mikey. Later, she'll will trek down to the sewers and see her boys. Later, she'll take care of chores and harass Donnie into sleeping and do everything she can to cheer Mikey up. Later, she'll talk to Splinter and help him stay present for his sons. Later, she'll hold Leo's cold hand in hers and try to will her baby brother to wake up by force.

Right now, she has a different baby brother to take care of, one who needs her because he feels like he can't go to anyone else. The clock reads 5:14 AM, and that's okay. She'll be here as long as she needs to.

[anmiruzu]

I saw your Halloween dialogue prompts and may I request number 3 with Aqua Hoshino if it hasn’t been requested already

-🥀anon

a little cold?

a/n of course :3 you wre actually the first request of the event so dw about it being requested already i’m a small acc after all and happy october first! yay! :>

-182 words- 

october first,

aquamarine hoshino; prompt 03: “you’re shivering. do you want my jacket?”

you hum as you wait for aqua, sitting on a park bench, swinging your legs back and forth, the cold now getting to you. you shiver as you feel the cool autumn breeze hit your skin now wishing you brought your sweater as you continue to softly hum to yourself. 

feeling a small tap on your shoulder, you jump.

“hey, i’m here” aqua waves to you smirking slightly at your startled reaction.

“aqua! you surprised me” 

you stand up going to stand by his side only to shiver feeling the breeze once again.

“you’re shivering,” he mutters rather abruptly.

“hm? what was that?”

he sighs softly, “it’s nothing” he thinks to himself for a moment before asking, “do you want my jacket?”

“huh?” you think you didn’t hear him right so you ask, “can you say it again?”

“you know what i said — here” he takes off his jacket wrapping it around you.

you chuckle softly, “was it that obvious?”

he scoffs, “obviously, now come on”

“mhm” with that the two of you walk off now going on your long awaited date.

{2023 halloween dialogue event lineup}

{oshi no ko masterlist}

[sgiandubh]

Imma need an in-depth breakdown of Puff please! And I’m not being sarcastic either. Puff pre-dates my time in the outlander fandom.

Regards,

Your curious anon.

Dear Puffy Curious Anon,

If my cantankerous boss would have summoned me at 03:03 pm EEST (when your request landed in my inbox), just to tell me "Imma need an in-depth breakdown of the Greek trade unions' position on the current critical understaffing of the HoReCa sector", I would have politely answered "yes, ma'am, when is the deadline". I would have then turned on my heels, rolled my eyes, sworn like a drunk sailor under my breath (fuck my life comes to mind, pardon my French) and quickly be done with it.

You, bless your Anon heart, wrote: "Imma need an in-depth breakdown of Puff, please". Wee difference, Curious Anon: you are not my cantankerous boss. That being said, since the question has been asked by several people in the comment threads of the day's posts, I am gonna give you my two cents on Queen Pufflander, even if you've been around before I even knew this weird place existed. And hopefully put to rest this nonsense forever (wishful thinking, doubt it will happen).

Once upon a time, when S&C's bantering was the plat du jour on Twitter and this fandom a considerably less toxic place, Puff the Magic Dragon of the US East Coast was one of the Queen Bees of Shipperville. Her blog was witty and no-nonsense (if a tad verbose) and, as *urv, she quickly earned her fair share of side performers: Stella and Deep Throat (SOURCES) or the tarot reader(s) immediately come to mind. People loved Puff and that is only fair, to be honest: I bet the farm she was great fun. Little by little, information traded in DMs started to pile up in her famed Vault, from which she was generously sharing, from time to time, sibylline rants ("maybe they did or maybe they didn't, but don't worry, something happened and all shall soon be revealed"). I can critique that forever and a day and tell you that all this sent people's expectations up the roof and beyond, of course. But, again: I was not here. It is unfairly easy to judge all these things with a historian's eye, and people who lived to tell the tale are far more entitled than me to comment their fandom experience, circa 2015.

When the whole Shatner/Watchtower baliverne started (early 2016, if memory serves) things ugly escalated and rather quickly so. People started jumping ship. With McSideburns already in the house (EIFF comes to mind and a certain poignant S&C penguin picture, too), enter Flukenzie Floozy. Thus, after IFH, Puffy decided to pack her crystal ball & tent and move to greener pastures on Wordpress. There, she held court with a keen eye for the Byzantine politicking of this fandom, not unlike what Perfidious Albion did with regard to the Thirteen Rebelling Colonies, after that Boston Tea Party. Her main moments of intersection with the rest of the shipper community are Covfefe Pics (of course) and Remarkable Week-end (of course). With regard to Covfefe, she quickly cried wolf, but by the time Remarkable Week-end happened, she pulled off a mighty witty breakdown of The Nuptial Charade of the Century. Blaze of glory was Quarantein Ha-wa-wee (of course), when she blamed S for all the world's evils and then some more. After that, she concentrated on her Neverending Feud with *urv (a Private Investigator was, at some point, hired and paid for via crowdfunding), which somehow managed to end (nevertheless) with a Report she might or might not have sent to S, "for further consideration".

As all good prophets, Puffy finally went into Occultation circa 2021, not without warning us that she was torn between Gay Sam & SamCait intellectual traditions, with a wee penchant for the first (reason why I completely ditched her peddling, because IYKYK).

I can understand why people might think I could be Puffy. I am, however, very sure about my own identity, whereabouts and creed: to state the opposite would really, really be mental. I fully assumed my responsibility and went ahead to actually prove you, this morning, I wasn't. Reading her rants was useful, but also taxing. I doubt Stella and Deep Throat were anything else but narrative helpers in a sophisticated Greimas actantial model. Something I would never do, for example: I am confident enough not to need any crutches. And I am very, very sorry for this word vomit: it should come, perhaps, as solace its length could never compete with Puff's storytelling marathons.

To wash my sins (not really: because I really love that picture), here's S,C, a penguin and a cakebox (?), at EIFF 2015. This is, you can be certain, the purest thing on this page, Anon:

[misteria247]

If I see another fic about one of the 2012 turtles "finally knowing what a real family is" in a rise!crossover, I'm gonna lose my goddamn mind

I feel ya Anon I truly do. It's honestly getting quite ridiculous.

To be honest with you, seeing this stuff happening to the 12 series lowkey breaks my heart. Like this is the show that I as well as so many others have grown up with and to see fanfics put these beloved characters in such uncharacteristic and horrible lighting is a quite upsetting to be blunt. Like I usually don't get involved with this kind of stuff, I'd rather just stay in my corner and just vibe but this is something I've just gotta get off of my chest. As a Rise fan myself, it's disheartening to see some fellow fans turn a blind eye to the faults that Rottmnt has and instead tries to make it seem like it's the best show out there. Like don't get me wrong the show's amazing, but it just like every Tmnt series, has it's flaws and weaknesses. Seeing the 12 series getting torn apart in this way and being treated in such a disrespectful manner reminds me way too much of the episode/movie from the 03 series that had the crossover with the "supposed" 87 series. Much like the fanfics going on now, the episode put 87 in a very bad light. It made the series look awful and basically tore it down and because of it, a lot of newer fans like myself at the time, didn't touch the 87 series at all. Not to mention that there was fans who tore it down and made it seem like the show itself was a waste of time.

Just like now, it's happening all over again. Only it's now the 12 series that's being torn down. It's honestly just upsetting to see something that you love and cherish be tarnished and ridiculed by people who've never even seen the show. Like I understand that people love Rise and they want to encourage others to check out the series so it can get recognition. But doing things such as putting down other variants of the franchise just to lift Rise up isn't the way to go. Especially when it's because of shows like the 12 series that helped paved the way for Rise to get to where it is now.

I love both shows, just like I love the others as well. And as a fan of these beloved series, all I ask is that there's some respect shown for both shows. Cuz this trend that's happening just isn't it fam. Like I get it, writing different characters can be hard and getting them completely in character can be challenging. As someone who's got their own crossover fic going, I understand completely how difficult it can be. So I try to be not too harsh with these things, but lately........it's become increasingly difficult not to.

[the-intersex-experience]

(rant) I hate how sports are separated by sex. I always say they shouldn't be but my mom told me she didn't like it either, but there is some biological advantage/reason for it in certain sports. She also said I should get into weight lifting like her because I would be good at it. (I have pcos). Idk how to explain it, It's just upsetting that theres that intersex erasure. that she thinks sports should be clearly divided yet not seeing the nuance already there

.

[miinjis]

OMG ! — a Kim Minji smau

SYNOPSIS :: Uh oh, it seems as if you and Kim Minji weren't slick enough! Each of your respective friend groups have caught onto your secret relationship. Even though they've yet to uncover the identity of your secret girlfriend, you've both figured that they will find out eventually, no matter the cost. How long will you and your beloved girlfriend, Minji, be able to keep this relationship hidden from them while sending them off course and on a wild goose chase?

PAIRING[S] :: idol! Kim Minji x idol! fem! reader, tba...

FEATURING :: Yel of H1-KEY [visuals], Newjeans, TXT, Wonyoung of IVE, Bahiyyih of Kep1er, Duna & Seoyeon of CSR, LE SSERAFIM, and more...

WARNINGS :: internalized homophobia, kys/kms jokes, sexual innuendos, curse words, tba...

DISCLAIMER :: this fic is fiction and is not meant to reflect their irl selves. the way they act is meant for plots sake and is 100% fake.

AUTHOR'S NOTE :: ignore timestamps unless stated otherwise, based off of the line "they keep on asking me who is he?" from omg

STATUS :: ongoing! [feb 26, '23 - ???]

🔖 TAGLIST :: open! send an ask off anon, send a message, or comment under any chapter to join!

GROUPS :: NewJeans | SOLARIA

01. ruh roh

02. gossip girl

03. stalker alert!

tba...

[50cal-fullauto-astarion]

⥇ rags / 30 / MDNI 18+ / ao3 / ask box (anon on)

[ 01/03/2024 ]: Went ahead and posted a Gone Fishin' sign on the door because I've been non-stop wringing my hands over not writing the last few months. Just got burned out between working retail hell season and some home-life stress, and decided, eh, fuck it, might as well take the pressure off myself to start off the year. Love y'all! <33

Follows and somtimes replies from @vide0-nasties!

Tags: My Work / Fic Recommendations / Inspiration (Quotes & Art) / WIP Previews / Housekeeping / Answered Asks

⥇ masterlist under the cut

⥇ recently posted

hot in sarajevo ii

x f!operator!reader - NSFW! pwp

After a successful assassination, König is in a foul mood after being forced into the role of spotter. He takes his pound of flesh in the form of frustrated sex. After an intoxicating string of kills behind your anti-material rifle, like hell are you going down without baring your teeth and snapping. Part II: sweet to the sour, with a surprise ending.

⥇ all works

call of duty: modern warfare

⥇ captain price

for the sake of having you near [ part: i / ii / iii ]

x f!veteran!reader - divorce au

Twenty years you had known John, and for seventeen of them you were married. After a career-ruining injury in the field, you were forced out of the service, and the marriage did not survive your survival. But: when John goes on leave, he always finds his way home to you.

⥇ könig

hot in sarajevo [ part i / ii ]

x f!operator!reader - NSFW! pwp

After a successful assassination, König is in a foul mood after being forced into the role of spotter. He takes his pound of flesh in the form of frustrated sex. After an intoxicating string of kills behind your anti-material rifle, like hell are you going down without baring your teeth and snapping.

to leave the blood stay in the veins [ part i, ii ]

monster!könig x f!cursed!reader - NSFW! monsterfucker au

There is a beast in the woods, and it leaves so little meat on the bone that not even carrion birds find value in the corpses it leaves behind. Your boyfriend thinks it’s funny. König, under his ever-present hood, laughs, sharp in the tooth. “Anyone dumb enough to head into the trees is dumb enough to die,” he teases, but there is an arrogance and a contempt swimming deep in his bloodshot blue eyes.

⥇ nikto

your bones singing into mine [ part i / ii / iii / iv ]

x gn!bioweapons engineer!reader - slice of life

You were once a brilliant thing, a creator of terrible and powerful miracles of modern science that could bring the world to its knees. A Russian crime syndicate that swept you up tucked you away in a small, dark place to keep you safe while they moved, leaving you to die a slow death in a forgotten hole. Nikto arrives at this barren corner looking for information and resources, and he finds exactly that in you. He decides that he will keep you, put you back to rights.

[clearbun]

your blog is so cool!!! can i ask if you have any special greed + devils nest gang headcanons to share for this humble anon's rewatch session?

aw tysm <3 I definitely have way too many thoughts about them rotating in my head constantly, let's see what we can grab today

one of the things that I actually really like from 03 is Greed busting out the chimeras when he's breaking himself out of the lab, so even though it doesn't exactly line up with what we're given in mangahood canon i like to hc something similar having happened anyways! (gonna be a lil vague because this loops back to a fic I'm writing a bit) "guy who's been locked up for who knows how long and isn't all there mentally's first instinct being to save people when all he can think about is needing to get out" does something to me yk

the chimeras having different sorts of chronic pain issues from being experimented on is so real to me that I forget it's not canon. I will die on the hill that Dolcetto's arm bands are actually braces to support his wrists. Greed catches any of them overdoing it when they're having a bad pain day and he will personally drag them off to bed whether they're in the middle of a conversation or work or anything. This is regular taking care of your possessions behaviour and not him being worried about his friends thank you very much

Roa just has the Vibes that he does most of the cooking for their group, but Greed definitely does quite a bit too (mostly when he can use excuses like "I'm the only one who can't get sick so I might as well be the one to make food" when there's something going around, or "Well I made this for Me because I need to eat all the finest things but I happened to make enough for everyone and being greedy means not letting things go to waste so you better have some" -guy who won't admit to himself or anyone else that everything he wants for himself is for them too)

Dolcetto being the main bouncer! most people would probably expect it to be Roa or Ulchi but he's a damn good guard dog thank you (being able to smoke more because he's outside the entrance is a bonus too) I don't have too specific hc's for what most of the others do during working hours other than Martel working the bar, but I kinda see Ulchi as dealing with fights that break out inside when he's not part of them himself (Roa helps with those ones it's ok)

[chiskz]

▶️ [RACHA LOG] Ep.03 리치빈 : Lee Know X CHICHI X Changbin

♡𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭: @alyszaen , @smh-anon , @neohyxn , @stealanity , @alixnsuperstxr , @kimcheon-sa , @hafsa-hoofsa-heefs , @qtnoaly

[ xxx ] - editors' notes

《 ♡ 》

The video begins with Ichi walking down the street. She corrects the camera and waves to it briefly.

CHICHI: Hey! So I was out for a little shopping and saw a poster advertising a.... a certain place. [secret already in the beginning?] The place looks really cool and there's something I haven't done before, so I think it will be fun to try it. But of course I won't go alone! [Loneliness is never an option?] I think I know who I would most like to go with. I'll go find them and ask them.

Ichi turns off the camera. The next shot shows her tentatively entering the gym in the label building. Minho is boxing on a punching bag and Changbin is warming up before lifting a barbell. Minho glances at her and stops working out.

Lee Know: Here comes trouble!

Changbin looks back and smiles at the sight of her.

Changbin: I already thought you were going to skip today's training!

CHICHI: I'm here today for something different.

She waved her hand apologetically.

CHICHI: I'm glad you two are here. A new place has opened up where I'd like to go with you and have some fun.

Lee Know: What kind of place?

CHICHI: It will be a surprise. Will you trust me?

Changbin and Minho look at each other, then Minho returns his eyes to Chichi.

Lee Know: I don't generally trust you in anything.

Ichi lowers her eyebrows and sticks out her tongue, then looks at Changbin.

CHICHI: Then at least how about you?

He nodded immediately, and Lino rolled his eyes amusedly.

Lee Know: Okay, let's go. I'm too curious now.

Ichi leads both of them by the hand to this "secret place", they are blindfolded.

Lee Know: I'm letting you to hold my hand for so long already, so it better be worth it!

CHICHI: Oh hush now!

Finally they reach the place, which turned out to be.... paintball playing center. The boys were able to take off their blindfolds.

Changbin: This is not what I expected!

Lee Know: I can shoot you guys and it's legal? [Lee Know, the main menace]

All three get the proper equipment, clothing, safety vest and special protective helmets with go-pro cameras. An employee of the paintball field also explains the rules that must be strictly adhered to - a shot is fired from a distance of MINIMUM 6 meters, a player's hit is scored when his body or his paint gun is hit.

The game conducted by LeeChiBin will look as follows: there are three rounds of 10 minutes each. In each round, a different player will start it with a red flag. The players' task is to take the flag away from the opponent. The round is won by the person who will own the flag at the end of the round. The whole game results from the person with the most wins. In case of a tie, the player who has been shot the least number of times wins.

All three go to the playing field built outside the building.

Changbin: Let's let tradition take its course and agree that the loser bets dinner!

Lino looks on, after carefully examining his paint gun.

Lee Know: Do you have too much money and want to put it to good use or what?

Ichi parries with laughter while covering her face with paint gun and Changbin looks tiredly at the camera. [it's impossible to have fun with them...]

Everyone goes to their positions, the first person with a flag is Minho. He waved it vigorously, as if making sure it's real. [Lee Know, please don't break the props]

Lee Know: I won't give it up so easily. I have a big craving for meat.

He said to the camera at his helmet. Then the signal could be heard starting the beginning of the round.

Changbin (to camera): Lee Know is unpredictable.... I wouldn't want to run into him, but since he has a flag.... I have to find him.

CHICHI (to camera): I don't want to meet Lee Know. I hope Changbin will be the first to take the flag from him, and I can take it from him in peace. [Changbin is an easier opponent???]

[however, to everyone's surprise... Lee Know runs to the middle of the field!]

Lee Know (to camera): It will be boring if everyone hides. So I'll wait for them here.

Changbin walks between the walls looking around.

Changbin (to camera): It's too quiet... It's suspicious.

Chichi creeps slowly behind him then touches him in the back with her gun. Changbin jumps back, but breathes a sigh of relief when it turns out it's not Minho.

CHICHI: Do you want to form an alliance, Binnie-ah?

Changbin lowers his eyebrows suspiciously for a moment.

Changbin: I don't know if I can trust you... This is war, after all.

CHICHI: We can't defeat him separately, but together.... Together we can have it all.

Ichi puts her hand on his shoulder and with her other hand makes a sweeping gesture as if showing him the world that could belong to them. [CHICHI's power of perspiration will work?]

Changbin finally agrees and they both quietly continue searching for Lino. He, however, finds them first and shoots each of them once, standing at a safe distance.

Lee Know: Is that all you can afford? Have you joined forces because you are so afraid of me?

Changbin and Ichi look at each other briefly, then return their eyes to Minho.

Changbin & CHICHI: Yes, actually... yes.

And for that answer they got another shots. [Could it be that Lee Know had them in a huff?]

But then, unexpectedly, Changbin started running toward him and Ichi fired from her position. Lino started to run away laughing loudly. [A happy cat finally having entertainment!]

Changbin finally caught him, hugging his back and lifting him slightly.

Changbin: Give back the flag!

Lee Know: Never!

CHICHI: GIVE THE FLAG!

Called Ichi even louder, running up to them and hugging Minho from the front. [This is not how to handle the enemy!]

However, neither of them managed to take the flag from him, at which Lino smiled triumphantly and waved it aggressively. [Winner of the first round - undefeated Lee Know!]

Minho became the winner of the remaining rounds as well, easily taking the flag from Changbin twice - in the second round, when Ichi had it first, and in the third round, when he owned it himself.

All three returned to the building to change back into their clothes and return all their equipment.

CHICHI: Lee Know is the winner, I really don't know how he did it...

Lee Know: How? You have to have cleverness and good physical conditions.

He said as if it was obvious. Ichi was declared the loser on the basis that she was shot the most times. She glanced sadly at the camera. [Someone's wallet is about to get slimmer...]

All three unanimously decided that they would eat out today. So they headed to their favorite food truck selling the best burgers in the area. After picking up their orders, they sat together on the sidewalk, away from the hustle and bustle. [LeeChiBin, for the first time quietly]

Changbin: It's too rare for us to go out together like this...

CHICHI: Yes, let's do it again sometime.

Lee Know: What about no?

《 ♡ 》

[bvtchcr]

Thanks for reading my guidelines. I go by the mun-alias Midnight, also Raven (she/they), early millennial, living in the CET timezone. My activity level is medium to low, my reply speed is slow, please don't rush me. English is my second language. I'm from a german roleplay community and immigrated to Tumblr in 2022 after our old platform got shut down. I'm still learning about Tumblr rp etiquette and guidelines, please be patient with me. If you see me doing something unusal or weird feel free to correct me at anytime but be respectful about it.

01. To interact with me, you have to be 18+ (mun and muse). I am not affiliated with The Boys, its creators or the actor Karl Urban and I don't own the character Billy Butcher. I claim ownership of my own written headcanons and texts only. The Boys is an R-rated series and this is a general trigger warning for mature content such as blood, gore, violence, abuse, trauma, sex, sick humour, foul language, weapons, drug use and overall rude behaviour which can be expected from this muse.

02. It should go without saying but at the same time cannot be stressed enough: mun ≠ muse. On some occasions people were not able (or willing) to differentiate between me and my character which led to them feeling offended ooc and hardblocking me midconvo without communicating their discomfort. Butcher can be tremendously rude and aggressive, he swears excessively and is quick to insult your muse if he dislikes them or feels provoked. Writing him close to the canon is very demanding and getting his tone of voice and demeanor right is one of the greatest challenges that I've ever came across in 15+ years of writing. It's such a bummer when I put in the effort and the result is totally misinterpreted. Make sure beforehand that you can absolutely handle interacting with such a muse and do not take anything from him personal or too serious. I am completely different from him, I consider myself friendly, patient and very chill about most things and I'm always willing to talk things out.

03. Besides roleplaying I am also a hobby gif maker, therefore personal blogs are welcome to interact with my posts. Just make sure you don't reblog or comment on roleplay related stuff which includes tag games, writing examples, headcanons, threads and answered asks. Speaking of asks: I will generally react in-character whenever possible. I've received some messages in my inbox that I can't quite classify. If you want to talk to me, the person behind, please put your text in brackets or mark as "for the mun" so I know for sure you're addressing me and not my muse.

04. I haven't very much in-character text on this blog yet, since I mostly rp privately in DM's or on sideblogs. I'm very open and curious to try threads, I'd love to have some writing on my blog whether it be novels, oldschool style shorter postings or some in-character chatting. This would come closest to the 'Pinnwand' we had on our old platform and I still miss it a lot. I'm using the beta editor, which should be standard at this point anyways, and I am able to trim posts. Feel free to hit me up if you're interested and are comfortable with doing any sorts of public threads. You can also just send me an ask (off anon to start a continuous interaction) or tag me in a starter. I highly prefer german and I'm not open to english advanced literate, where complex prose is required. I have little to no experience with it but maybe I'll get more comfortable in the future.

05. When it comes to writing, I ask for a few things: no godmodding, power play or meta gaming. I also don't like forcing or rushing certain interactions that don't feel like natural character progression. Plotting beforehand is welcome but not mandatory. If it ever feels like being stuck we can pause the writing and have a small plotting session between scenes or even for the same scene. I am a big fan of the "yes, and" approach. Give me something to work with, don't let your replies be "dead" and passive. I get discouraged very quickly when I get little to no input and have to come up with moving the plot or interactions myself all the time. I don't have an estimated length for texts, it always depends and I usually don't match length just for the sake of having written a lot. I am not too fond of texts that are artificially bloated and there's essentially nothing happening.

06. I'm multiship and multiverse, meaning every ship takes place in its own verse if not communicated otherwise. I personally enjoy shipping a lot if there's good chemistry but Butcher is difficult to ship and due to his background pretty much unavailable for romantic bonding. It's not impossible though. I'm also interested in any setting where I get a chance to write him as an unhinged villain and diverge from the canon more liberately.

07. My approach to curating my dashboard is quite different, I would say, compared to what's considered standard (clean dash, small circle of mutuals). I follow a lot, and I mean a shitton, of people. I follow every blog out of interest and curiousity but please understand that it's impossible for me to interact with everyone. Also due to my gif making I get quite a bit of notifications when I'm actively posting sets, I'm prone to accidentially miss out on notifs about new followers/mutuals. My dashboard is fast and busy and I like it that way, I've made a conscious choice about this. It has become a wind down ritual for me, just silently scrolling, catching up and finding lots of stuff I enjoy without feeling obligated to contact people or getting replies done. Yes, I am here for rp, but I like to do lots of other things on Tumblr, too. There's periods of time where I don't have the energy to work on drafts or talk to anyone, not even folks who I have grown to genuinely like. Rest assured that you never did anything wrong when I disappear for a while. If I have any sort of issue or problem I will communicate it. What I'm not willing to do is constantly giving activity updates on a schedule. If I go on hiatus for longer I will most likely make a post about it. It's my personal opinion that no one should ever feel pressured into explaining why and for how long they are away.

08. Don't be a cunt. I have zero tolerance for homophobia, transphobia, racism, ableism, sexism, hateful comments in general, out of character drama, gossiping, constant negativity, passive aggressiveness, vague posting, guilt tripping, gaslighting and other similar behaviour. Just be a decent person and we're fine.