#8. Random picture from that other costume I did a while ago after I had taken the wig off and my hair was sitting funny

[icewindandboringhorror]

sleepy mr baby + other random misc images

[imgoingtohellsofuckit]

Fake Date

Denki Kaminari x Reader (Gender Neutral)

Warning : None

Summary: You need a fake date for your holidays party and Denki is the person for the job.

"Wait wait wait stop you want me to do what?"

I sigh looking back to the guy in front of me. Disbelief sprawled across his face. Every inch of his being seemed either confused or amused at the ask. 

"I need you to be my date for my families holiday party," I repeat. He just starts to bust out laughing. "Denki this isn't funny! This is seriously."

"Sure sure but why me? We barely like each other?" He asks me, "seriously until a month ago we were almost sworn enemies."

"I wouldn't say enemies," I say as my eyes look to the ground. 

"Why me?" He asks again.

"You are the exact guy my parents wouldn't want me to be with," I say as I meet his eyes, "seriously they hate these alternative guys! I mean they freaked when my sisters last boyfriend had an earring. They'd hate you! And I really want to piss them off." He starts to laugh again. I scoff harshly as I pull back. "I don't know why I even asked you! Jeez this was such a mistake."

"No no no," He says grabbing my arm to keep me from leaving, "I'm just amused that of everyone you could have asked you came to me."

"I was going to take Kiri," I say as I pull away from him, "but my parents would love him. They'd have it out to the press that we were looking into marriage before I even knew. You however. They'd finally get off my ass about everything."

"Mmm I would but I'm busy babe," He says smirking widely.

"No you don't," I say to him.

"How do you know I don't have plans?" He asks me a brow raised slightly in amusement.

"Because every holiday where people go home to see their family you sit in you and sero's apartment jacking off to pictures of Midnight in her original hero costume.”

"How do you-"

"Kaminari you told me at the new years party while you were wasted and trying to shove your tongue down my throat," I say to him while I fold my arms over my chest, "now I'm sorry for even asking you I'll go to Bakugo-"

"NO- I mean no it's fine I'll go with you," He says to me, "I'll get your family off your ass."

"Sweet thank you so much-" I start.

"Ah ah ah on one condition," He says to me, "next interview you have about being a top tier pro hero you have to take me with you."

"Fine sure whatever," I say to him, "I am completely fine with you going on the show with me. Seriously those losers are way too stuffy anyways." He smiles brightly then nods. 

"You are lucky that I enjoying being a disappointment to parents," He says smirking, "so when do you want to go meet the parents?"

"Thursday," I tell him, "meet me here and we'll head out." 

"Of course she you then pretty," He says to me. He winks at me then moves off. 

I am going to regret this aren't I.

Three days later after much taunting its time. As I fix my outfit in the mirror the blond struts into my apartment. A smirk already plastered across his face. 

"Are we staying there?" He asks, "are we gonna have to share a bed? Are you gonna be naked?"

"Okay you pervert we aren't staying the night," I tell him, "we drive up there and then drive back simple as that. Now get the idea that anything is going to happen there out of your head." He chuckles lightly.

"You act like you don't want something to happen," He says snarkily. His teasing evident in his voice.

"I don't!" I exclaim, "I just want my parents off my ass for the rest of the season before I have to do it all again next year."

"Who knows you might be taking me for real next year," He adds. I sigh looking over at him finally. I see he has a black button up on with some ripped black jeans and a flannel tied around his waist. Paired with it he has some boots giving him a couple inch height boost and layers of earrings and chokers. He looks good. Has he always looked like this? "Are you checking me out?"

"No," I say to him, "I'm not checking you out." I back away from the boy annoyed at the accusation. "I would never check you out."

"You were totally checking me out," He says softly, "seriously I know I look good but damn you can't be looking at me like a piece of meat."

"I already wish I got Bakugo," I say with a sigh, "hell even Shinso would have worked and he wouldn't have been a perv about it." Denki sighs as he moves behind me. I look to see our reflection in the mirror. We look good together. I guess I never noticed that we would have been a cute couple. Where is this coming from?! Oh my gosh whats wrong with me. 

"Look at how cute we are," He says to me. He pulls bake and smiles brightly at me. "If you want us to look like a real couple you're gonna have to at least pretend to like me. I mean I am doing you a nice favor."

"Yeah thanks Denki," I say as I turn to meet his eyes, "I hate to cut into your time with Midnights picture and a bottle of lotion."

"Hey your always welcome to help," He says with a wide smirk. I move punching him in the arm harshly. "Ow! Kidding god I'm kidding I'd never ask you to do that. Well I mean unless you want- Ow!"

"Knock it off," I say to him, "actually- if you say that around my parents they'll freak. Keep it up."

"Uh yeah alright," He says to me.

"Now come on hottie lets go piss of my parents," I say to him as I grab his hand. I pull my purse on my arm and move pulling him out of my home to the car. Once we pile inside I notice his flirty personality is more relaxed. Like he finally toned down. "You alright?"

"Yeah," he says staring out the window, "just thinking about how I haven't met anyone's parents in this fashion since I met Jiro's family back in 2nd year."

"Wow that was like what 5 years ago?" I ask him, "huh its been a while since you dated anybody seriously huh?"

"Like you can talk," He says to me, "the last person you dated was what Todoroki back in 3rd year?"

"Nah we broke up the year after that," I correct him, "but yeah its been a bit. I mean I had that think with Izuku last year but its just ya know hard to date with the public in your face about every little thing." 

"Tell me aout it," He says to me, "I went on one date with some girl from my agency and suddenly everyone was on my dick about it. I mean I got hounded by reporters asking all about the scoop."

"See its hard to date in our career," I tell him, "pros don't really catch a break. And that doesn't even count the fact that dating a non hero puts them in terrible danger and how it makes a weakness that villains would defiantly exploit." I sigh focusing on the road as we move along the directions towards my childhood home. 

"Would you date?" He asks me.

"Yeah if the right person came along," I say to him, "what about you?"

"I want to get back out there," He says sneaking a glance at me.

"Well any ideas?" I ask him.

"I have my eyes on a special someone," He says to me. 

"Well who?" I ask him.

"Uh you wouldn't know them," He says quickly, "they are at my agency." 

"Oh," I say softly. Who does that bother me? Who cares if he's into some random girl. "They cute?"

"The cutest- ah I mean their alright," He says, "perfect. I've known them for a while. I've just been too scared to say anything."

"Well you should just talk to them," I offer up to him, "you'll never know. I mean if I was them I'd want you to tell me."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," I say to him, "trust me."

"Well uh I-"

"Oh look we're here," i say to him. I pull into the packed drive way parking in the furthest spot. "You were saying?"

"Uh nothing," he says to me, "uh lets go in."

"Alright," I say to him. We both climb out and meet at the front of the car. He moves pulling my hand into his. I start to feel my heart racing at the action. Stop it Y/n this isn't anything. He's just playing along.

 "How long have we been dating?" He asks me.

"You pick," I tell him, "I'll get the story together but don't panic- oh hey mom!" My mother moves pulling me into a deep hug. As she pulls back and I reclaim Denki's hand she looks to him slightly confused.

"Who's this?" She asks me.

"This is my boyfriend Denki," I tell her, "Denki this is my mother. Leia L/n."

"Nice to meet you Leia," He says with a sly smirk, "hows it going?"

"You can call me Ms. L/n," She says sternly, "its nice to meet you Denki." Her eyes move back to me, "shall we head inside."

"Sure," I say to her. As we move inside he tightens his grip on my hand. He's actually nervous. Jeez you'd think this was the real deal or something. Once inside I feel my entire family move their eyes to us. Like apparently we are the most interesting thing in the room. "Hey everyone."

Various hellos are thrown towards us. We follow my mother to the kitchen where she hands over a glass of wine. 

"Oh no thanks I'm alright," I say to her, "I'm driving."

"Oh he's not?" She asks.

"No I'm driving," I correct, "Denki isn't allowed to drive my car after he almost drove us off a bridge three years ago."

"If you weren't using your quirk to mess with me it wouldn't of happened!" He adds.

"Oh sure sure," I say. A light smirk on my face. My quirk is puppeteer I can control others in a puppet like fashion. Shinso and I always had to train with each other because of our quirks. Anyways I was messing around with him as he was driving me home one night from a club. But it was hardly my quirk that made him almost crash. Really it was when my dress fell down that he made the sudden jolt. 

"Three years?" My mom asks us.

"How long of you all been together?" My sister asks as she joins us.

"We've been together for 8 months now," Denki tells them, "but we went to school together."

"We've been friends for so long so we have quite a bit of history huh," I say looking over to Denki. The smile on my face so pure. He smiles as he looks over me.

"You two are quite the pair huh?" My sister asks looking between us, "how'd you get together?"

"I thought they were gonna ask me," Denki says, "they've always been the one with guts between the two of us. But they never did. Then we were at a party for someone's birthday. We both were just relaxing on the roof after it all became too much just having a good time. Talking about our future and dreams. After a while I decided I needed to ask them" He's talking about the party. I remember that. I was waiting for him to do something. He wasn't being flirty or pervy he was just being himself. It was so nice. I leaned in for him to kiss me and then Shoto opened the door. We jumped about fifty feet back from another. "I had rehearsed the words hundreds of times. But then all the sudden I couldn't make them fit. But when I looked at her they just formed together-" He meets my eyes then snaps out of it, "now Y/n is my favourite hoe I have."

"Excuse me!"

"Don't talk about my child like that!"

"Guys its fine," I say to them, "it's chill."

"Chill?" My mom asks then mumbles something under her voice as she looks to my father completely annoyed. "She always picks the worst ones-"

"Thats not true Shoto was great," My sister says, "you guys loved him. Remember you begged her to get back together with him."

"He was a good one!" My father adds, "she can't pick them anymore."

"Whatever," I huff, "Denki let me show you around." I tighten my grip on his hand as I lead him away from the full kitchen and dining room. As we get to the hallway I pull him towards my childhood room. "Now don't make fun of the décor I picked it out at ten."

"I wouldn't make fun of it," He says unconvincingly. I roll my eyes and pull him into the room. Around me pink walls and butterflies fill the room. "Nice collection of boyband posters."

"Ah that addition was added around 13," I say to him, "along with that wall of pictures right there." He moves looking over them. I smile forms across his face. 

"I'm in a lot of these," He comments.

"Well of course you are," I say to him, "you're one of my closest friends and you've been that since we started at UA."

"True," He says as he pokes at a picture of Todoroki and I where I'm pecking his cheek. "What actually happened with you two?"

"I realized that he and I both wanted different things," I tell him, "I wanted to get married and he didn't. Which is fine I completely understood wanting to wait. But then he said he wouldn't really want to get married at all."

"Oh," Denki says.

"Yeah well I decided that I wouldn't keep going with a relationship that I knew was going nowhere," I explain, "Todoroki and I weren't really even in love anymore. So it makes sense that we split up."

"I always thought it was because of you and Izuku," he says, "thats what spread around at least."

"God no," I say to him, "Izuku and I weren't even trying anything. We made out at a party once that year and all the sudden everyone screamed about how I left Todoroki for him." 

"I'm sorry about that," He says to me. 

"Its whatever," i say to him. I sit down on my bed and he settles beside me. "So that story?"

"Oh that," he says softly, "it was nothing. Just something I've spun. I'm good at making cover stories up like that."

"That night I honestly thought you were gonna kiss me," i say to him, "I was waiting. Ya know then Shoto opened the door and suddenly you pulled back."

"I didn't want to cause something between you two," Denki says, "you guys for a bit seemed like you were going to get back together."

"I didn't want to he wanted to try it again," I admit, "I had my mind on another guy."

"Was it- was it me?" He asks quietly. My eyes meet his. 

"Does it matter anymore?" I ask him, "you like someone else. You know the person at your agency." He moves crashing his lips into mine. Shock covers my face but I start to melt into the soft kiss. As we move together I can't help but to feel like everything in our lives has been leading up to this. Finally I pull away. "Kaminari you are the worst." He smirks.

"But you love me."

"Always have."

[lgbtyrus]

Two Exes on Mars

A Tyrus fic where they’re aged up + broken up :) It will have a ‘happily ever after’, I promise. Note: IDK if you know your Andi Mack lore, but just in case, Shadyside is in a fictional US state called Midwest.

Part 1/? (I’m thinking 3 or 4)

Words: 2,668

He kissed him goodbye. It wasn’t even rainy or cloudy outside, much less foggy. It was super bright and sunny, and Cyrus could hear every single bird in Shadyside chirping as his now ex-boyfriend walked out the front door of his house. He waited until TJ was out of his driveway to shut the door and break out in tears, pressing his forehead and fist against his door.

Why? he wondered. Why? Why? Why?

But he knew why. He knew why TJ had let him go in the worst breakup in the world. He had tried to a week ago which led to Cyrus breaking down in front of him and ended up with them back together. But the tension between them was so obviously, and it lead to TJ’s horrible mood swings and random outbursts he never apologized for. It made Cyrus feel like crap. Then in the middle of the week, TJ tried breaking up with him over text. Cyrus ignored it, and TJ went over to his house the next day like nothing had happened. Not even three days later, TJ came over to break up him a third time. For good.

That just happened two minutes ago, and Cyrus silently let him leave this time. He shouldn’t have ever let him see him cry.

“You have to go to California, Cyrus,” TJ had told him, his eyes red and his hands clenching into tight fists. All Cyrus could do was stare at the floor. It’s not everyday you get a chance to go to USC, but it also meant leaving everyone you loved behind- including TJ. Him and TJ had been together since the 8th grade, and he had included TJ in all of his future plans. For him, being in a long distance relationship was a possibility, and he never thought TJ would be against it.

“I want to go to MSU,” Cyrus shook his head, refusing to look at him. TJ was going to MSU on a basketball scholarship, and yeah, they had a theatre and screenwriting, but it wasn’t USC. It was one of the hardest choices Cyrus had to make.

“You’re clearly lying, Cyrus,” TJ let out a frustrated sigh, “I know when you’re lying.” It’s true, he did. His hands always instinctively went inside a pocket, and Cyrus has never been able to stop it. “Cyrus. I know I’m the main reason why you want to stay in Midwest, but I want you to go to USC. It’s what you want.”

“Does that mean we have to break up, though?” Cyrus asked him sadly, his voice quiet. TJ ran his fingers through his blonde hair and let out a deep breath.

“We’d be doing long distance for four years, Cyrus. I don’t want to hold you back from being at your prime if you’re moping around missing me the entire time.”

“Are you just saying this because you’re the one that’s not going to be fine?” There wasn’t even a pause.

“Yes, Cyrus!” TJ said loudly, startling Cyrus. “I can’t spend four years of my life being sad because I miss you all the time, but I also can’t live with the guilt I’m going to feel if you don’t go to USC. This entire situation is driving me insane, and I really think breaking up is the best way to go.”

“You honestly think that?” Cyrus frowned, looking right up at him. He didn’t want to break down like he did the first time. “You’re just giving up? Not even giving long distance a try. After five years, TJ?”

TJ shamefully looked away before saying, “I love you, Cyrus. But I think it’d hurt less to let you go.”

“How?” Cyrus’ voice started to tremble as he spoke in complete disbelief, “How can you even say you love me right now?” TJ didn’t say anything. He just slowly walking up to Cyrus, each step taking its own time before cupping his face in his hands and kissing him softly.

TJ pulled away, whispering, “Bye, Cyrus.”

Cyrus was now sitting on his bedroom floor, playing music louder than his occasional sob. Andi and Buffy were on their way, but until then, it was him, and a lone polaroid picture he had of him and TJ on their first Valentine’s Day together right in front of him. Him and TJ were sitting on one side of the booth at The Spoon while Marty and Buffy sat on the other side. TJ had his arms around him and was smiling in to his cheek, leaving a very fluttered Cyrus to be captured forever.

“Cyrus!” someone yelled out from downstairs. “We’re here.”

“Upstairs!” Cyrus yelled out, his voice slightly cracking. He hadn’t spoken since TJ left, and his throat hurt. He was glad he left the door unlocked for them because he didn’t have the energy to move.

Andi peaked her head through his bedroom door, frowning when she saw him, “Hi, Cyrus.”

“Hey,” Cyrus waved, “come in.” He hadn’t seen Andi in about three weeks was she was getting busy with her senior art project for SAVA. He loved her for being here during a busy time. Buffy trailed in behind Andi with two loaded grocery bags.

“We brought ice cream and pie,” Buffy held the bags up. “We stopped by your kitchen to get utensils.”

“Thank you because I was not going to move,” Cyrus said. Andi and Buffy sat down on each side of him and rested their heads on his shoulder.

“You can cry if you want,” Andi told him.

“Yeah,” Buffy agreed, “we bought three tissue boxes.”

“I’ve been crying for like an hour, and I’m just tired of it at this point. But this is also probably just the start,” Cyrus mumbled. “How am I supposed to accept that someone I talked to everyday for five years is leaving my life?”

“I know it hurts, Cyrus,” Buffy whispered. “But you’re stronger than you think. You’re going to get through this. Trust me. I’m always right.”

“I know you are,” Cyrus smiled slightly. “You know what sucks the most though?”

“What?” they asked in unison.

“We already have matching tuxedos from prom.” -

Cyrus and TJ showed up with new tuxedos to prom. Andi herself made Cyrus a brand new one. The according to different sources, both Cyrus and TJ had both begged Gus to cancel their Prom Court nomination. Gus thought it was funny until Buffy stepped in, and he got scared.

Cyrus and TJ didn’t sit together at lunch anymore or do homework together or visit the swing sets every Tuesday after TJ got out of tutoring. Cyrus submitted his paperwork to attend USC in the fall and according to Amber who was at Shadyside’s community college, TJ was going to go to MSU to play for their basketball team. Buffy and Marty would be seeing him at MSU seeing they got track scholarships.

Cyrus cried every night for the rest of the school year after finishing his homework because he worked to hard to have his GPA suffer over a boy who clearly didn’t care if he fell apart. He sometimes sat in the bathtub and let music fill his whole bathroom and no matter what, every single song would remind him of TJ. Of course, that was his fault for playing the playlists TJ had made him on Spotify. He wondered if he could see that he was listening to them. He hoped he did.

Cyrus didn’t have any communication with TJ since the last texts he sent him. It was a 2AM on a Saturday night, about three weeks since the breakup. He felt horrible and didn’t know how to stop crying. Even though Buffy had told him to call him whenever, he couldn’t keep dumping everything on her.

Cyrus: hey tj I hope im not waking u up idk if you still have your phone set so that u only get text alerts from me but I just wanted to say that I miss you.

Cyrus: I miss you so much tj idk what to do without you. Everything hurts all the time and I just want to talk to you and hear you voice even if we cant date anymore please talk to me. Please be my friend again tj we were best friends for 5 years we work so good together

Cyrus: I love you. I think that ill always be in love with you.

TJ: Goodnight Underdog.

Cyrus didn’t remember what time he went to sleep, but he felt like he cried for hours after that. The pain in his chest beat him up completely until he was too weak to flip his pillow to the dry side.

At their graduation, Cyrus gave a speech and then walked off stage to everyone in the auditorium clapping. It felt surreal. When he looked up smiling, out of all of the people he saw in the sea of graduates, he saw TJ clapping. He had his lip curled up in one corner which showed that he was on the verge of tears. That was the only time that night Cyrus wanted to cry.

-

A month into USC and without a doubt, Cyrus was homesick and probably depressed. He had made a great group of friends that were similar to him and super positive. He appreciated them, but 8 out of 10 times, they could never convince him to leave his room. He just stayed in and did homework and work on his script. It was about a man who gets his heart shattered and decided to move to Mars as part of a science experiment and when he’s already in space, he realize that his ex is one of the 100 people on board. Things quickly escalate. His friends loved the scripts and always asked to read updates, but he still sent snippets to Bex because he missed her.

It had been months since the breakup with TJ that happened late April. He should be over it now, he thought a lot of the time. But it still hurt. TJ really shot a hole in his heart and there was nothing he could do about it. He didn’t cry everyday like he used to. But every other few weeks, he snuck into the bathroom to cry so his roommate wouldn’t see. It was embarrassing to admit.

Cyrus kept things in a rotation. Script, class, eat, homework, sometimes friends, and sleep. It was hard to stay happy and to enjoy himself. It was hard to feel like he was living through something when he’s been dead inside for months. With Halloween coming up, he felt even worse. He’s never not had anyone to match costumes with. For five years, him and TJ did a couple’s costume and before that, him, Buffy, and Andi always had something up their sleeves. He missed all of them.

Then one day, his roommate let one of his friends into their dorm room. His roommate was part of his friend group, so there was that. Cyrus was working on his infamous script and didn’t even get a text that he was coming. Usually, he said no, though. “Hey, Rich,” Cyrus said as he walked in.

“Hey, Cy,” he said. “I was in the building and wanted to drop by.”

“Why’d you text Karson and not me?” Cyrus asked.  

“You always say no.”

“True. Anyways, what’s up?”

“We need one more person for our Halloween costume. It’s Full House. We need an Uncle Jesse. You in?”

“Yeah,” Cyrus grinned, “of course.”

-

“Damn,” his friend Bogie said. “That TJ foo fucked you up bad, huh?” All eight of them were sitting around a bonfire before Thanksgiving break. It had been a long night of confessions and telling each other things not a lot of other people knew. Somehow in the moment, Cyrus spent thirty minutes telling them the becoming and downfall of him and TJ. Rich had convinced him to go to therapy on campus early November, and Cyrus wished he had gone sooner. It was getting so much easier to be around his friends and have open conversations.

“Yeah,” Cyrus admitted. “I cried everyday for months. I still cry sometimes.”

“Is that why you spend forever in the bathroom?” Karson asked him. Cyrus nodded.

“Damn, Cy,” Roxana mumbled, “no wonder you were so distant at the beginning of the school year. I thought you were just stuck up, but I guess I was wrong. I’m glad you trust us now, though.”

“Me, too,” Cyrus said.

“So, this TJ,” Bogie asked, “what’s he up to?”

“Besides knowing that he plays basketball for Midwest State U, I have no idea. I haven’t talked to him since I last texted him after the breakup. I’m still good friends with his sister, but she never says anything.”

“Dang, so he’s a baller?” Bogie asked.

“Probably just getting fucked up at parties,” Mikhenna suggested. Cyrus didn’t respond. He just shrugged.

“Do you still love him?” Roxana asked him.

“I don’t think so,” Cyrus shook his head. “I’d be stupid to. But thanks for listening, guys. I feel a lot better. I feel like I belong and that I can finally move on.”

-

Cyrus didn’t see the point of flying all the way back home for a week long break, so he decided to stay behind in California and take a train to his aunt and uncle’s place. They had a daughter that thirteen and always had juicy middle school drama.

When he was laying down on the bed of the guest room, his phone started vibrating. Buffy was on Facetime, and he answered immediately saying, “Hey, Buff.”

“Hey, Cyrus,” Buffy grinned widely before switching the camera, “look who’s with me!”

Andi waved at the camera, “Hey, Cyrus!”

“Andi,” Cyrus grinned. “How are you? We haven’t talked in like four days.”

“I know right,” Andi laughed. “I’m fine. What about you?”

“I’m good, I’m good,” he said before registering completely that Andi was in Shadyside. “Wait,” he paused, “aren’t you supposed to be in Pennsylvania?”

“Yeah but a professor died, so they gave us two weeks off instead of three days and just postponed winter break.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

“I have no idea who he is,” Andi shrugged. “But where are you?”

“With my dad’s sister and her family. I’m just chilling and eating home made food before I go back,” Cyrus smiled. Andi moved over to sit next to Buffy and Cyrus noted that they were at the Mack’s place.

“So enough of that,” Buffy said and then looked at Andi who gave her a stern look. “Come on, let me tell him.”

“Well now you have to tell him,” Andi rolled his eyes.

“That’s very true,” Cyrus agreed.

“I know,” Buffy smirked. “That’s why I said that. Anyways,” she looked right at the camera, “we went to the mall with Amber in her car, but it broke down in the parking lot when we were leaving. She had to call TJ to come pick us up, which was already awkward enough because I always ignore him at school, but I was like whatever, it’s a twenty minute drive. Then in the car, literally, this man, I mean, boy, can ask any question. Any question in the world. Preferably, one directed at his sister, like you know, has your car been acting funky for a while? But he asks me and Andi, ‘How is Cyrus doing?’” Cyrus’ heart dropped. He hasn’t heard anything about TJ in so long he’s forgotten how to react.

“What did you say?” Cyrus asked nervously.

“I said that I charge $50 per fact,” Buffy said, “and he didn’t say anything else.”

“That’s weird,” Cyrus frowned. “I wonder why he doesn’t just ask Amber. I literally call her once a week, every Tuesday.”

“No idea,” Buffy said. “But maybe she just doesn’t answer him for the same reasons I didn’t.”

“Which are?”

“We love you.”

-

anyways follow my main @webarebares <3 thank you for reading! feel free to send asks if something was confusing or if a typo was horrible or just because. i luv u.

[littleeyesofpallas]

Batman shenanigans...

So, I’m the type of would-be writer that gets easily bogged down in plotting and planning and researching minutia more than writing actual moment to moment scenes and dialog, and the rabbit hole I’ve found myself tumbling down most recently has been this…

I wanted to rewrite Jason’s Red Hood origin story; from his death and resurrection, up until his big return.  Under the Hood has a great finale and a memorable confrontation scene between Jason and Bruce, but in all honesty, the plot surrounding it is pretty blase.  And granted, that’s mostly because there were no real long term plans for Jason as Red Hood beyond the big twist, so the initial story wasn’t really written with any solid themes, overarching direction, or character integrity in mind.  But then on top of that things attempting to elaborate on the intervening years (Lost Days, and that weird thing they did in the first Red Hood & The Outlaws) also just aren’t especially well handled.  They tend to be narrow in scope, isolated within continuity, and not especially thematically substantive.

But here we are, at a point in Jason’s character and publication history, where I think there’s just a lot that can be done with revisiting the idea of his Red Hood debut, as well as the events leading up to it, that could better incorporate his character’s themes and personal history.  Something that until somewhat recently had all just felt a little too fresh, still, to really warrant any kind of rewrite and retcon.

The first big question I had to ask myself was, “How long was Jason dead/gone?” because to have gone from a somewhat under accomplished Robin to a credible threat to Batman himself, needs time, even with remarkable circumstances surrounding his training.  So, I needed to figure out how long I really needed/had available to work with for his training, as well as what that training would entail; and part of figuring that out also meant taking stock of all the Batfam events Jason missed while gone.  Basically, I had to figure out what Batfam events I wanted to keep in my new continuity, and draw up a timeline to keep track of them all…

So, taking a cue from the old Superman & Batman: Generations elseworlds comic —in which John Byrne re-envisions the World’s Finest’s superhero careers as if they had debuted in the year of their first issues, and aged in sync with the real world ever since— I anchored my timeline around Jason’s death in 1988 and just started working out fixed measurements from there…

For example, When Jason becomes Robin, Dick had recently retired the costume and gone to college, putting something of a finite age range on Dick, which helps orient his and Jason’s relative ages, and in turn lets me pinpoint their years of birth, and by proxy nail down Bruce’s age if we consider he adopts Dick in Year Two as Batman.  And going off Batman: Year One’s premise of Bruce starting his vigilante career at age 25, it gives me a solid grasp of his age as well.

One problem of course came from the early days of The Dynamic Duo; namely Robin’s time between the ages of 8 and ~17(leaving for college) which lasted the awkward 40-odd years of publication.  My solution was to scale the years in publication to his two confirmable ages at the time of The Flying Graysons’ deaths(8yo) and his leave for college(age 17); resulting in a ratio of 1 in-world year:~4.44 publication years.

Applying this to the years before 1980(when Dick leaves for college) in turn pinpoints Babs’ debut as Batgirl, which ironically ends up scaling down to the same year Jason first appears as part of The Flying Todds. (I kept the date of his appearance, but opted to keep his later origin story)

Anyway, while this process was fun and all (and hopefully leads to something a little more productive in the future) the bottom line here is that I just wanted to share the timeline I’ve constructed, because it paints a somewhat jarring picture of everyone’s ages, relative to one another and at the time of certain major events.

Now!  Enjoy this harrowing examination of the relative ages of all your favorite Batfam characters, if they didn’t all just hover around the ages of 18-30!

1970: YEAR ONE 

Bruce Wayne is 25 - becomes Batman (parents died 17y ago)

Barbara Gordon is 15 (just entering High school

Jean-Paul Valley is 1

In 1 year…

8yo Dick Grayson will watch his parents will die

1976: BATMAN & ROBIN - THE DYNAMIC DUO

Bruce is 31, Barbara is 21 (graduating with her Bachelors)

Dick is 13 - becomes Robin

Helena Bertinelli is 8 - watches her parents die

1979: BATGIRL

Bruce is 34, Dick is 16 (has been Robin for 3 years)

Babs is 24 - becomes Batgirl

already completed a PhD in Library Science

Jason Todd is 8 - watches parents die

in 1 year…

35yo Bruce will have been Batman for 10 years

17yo Dick will be shot, fake death, & go to college

join the New Teen Titans(?)

1983:  JUST ANOTHER KID ON CRIME ALLEY

Bruce is 38, Dick is 20, Babs is 28

Jason is 12 - becomes the 2nd Robin 

Stephanie Brown & Cassandra Cain are both 1yo

In 1 year…

21yo Dick becomes Nightwing

1988: DEATH IN THE FAMILY & KILLING JOKE

Bruce is 43, Dick is 25

Jason is 17 - murdered

Babs is 33 - shot and paralyzed

Lucas Fox is born

In 1 year…

Babs becomes Oracle

21yo Helena becomes Huntress

12yo Kate Kane watches her mother and sister die

1990: A LONELY PLACE OF DYING

Bruce is 45, Dick is 27, Babs is 35

Tim Drake is 13yo - becomes the 3rd Robin

Tim Drake & Kate Kane are the same age

Cassandra Cain is 8yo -  just killed her first man

1992: KNIGHT FALL

Bruce is 47, Dick is 29, Babs is 37, Tim & Kate are 15

Stephanie Brown is 10 - becomes Spoiler

Jean-Paul Valley is 23 - becomes Azrael

Renee Montoya is 21 - joins GCPD, partnered with Harvey Bullock

In 1 year…

48yo Bruce will have back broken by Bane

24yo Jean-Paul will become Batman

1995: LOST DAYS

Bruce is 50, Dick is 32, Helena is 27, Kate is 18, Cass is 13

Babs is 40 - forms Birds of Prey

Tim is 18 - retires as Robin, goes to college

based on Unmasked happening while Tim is in high school, but pushing to senior year to accommodate Spoiler’s age

Steph is 13 - becomes the 4th Robin

keeping War Games in ‘04, Steph gets more time as Robin

Calvin Rose is 8 - locked in kennel by his father

In 1 year…

Jason will rise from the dead (with the body of a 17yo)

33yo Dick will relocate to Bludhaven

51 yo Bruce and ??yo Talia will conceive Damian

1999: NO MAN’S LAND

Bruce is 54, Dick is 36, Babs is 44, Jason is “20,” Kate is 22

Tim is 22 - returns as Robin

Steph is 17 - pregnant

Helena is 31, Cass is 17 - sequence of Batgirls

Duke Thomas and Harper Row are 1 

Steph being 10 when she starts as Spoiler is also a little hard to believe, I know.  And her having a thing with Tim 5 years her senior is pretty squicky. (It’s not a big age gap for adults, but the fact that Tim would be 20 when she’s 15 is pretty, bleugh!)

But the problem is that I anchored her to her teen pregnancy in 1999, and a pregnancy scare at 18 or 19 doesn’t really feel like a big deal, (I mean, it is as a personal thing, but not so much as a publication thing*, if that makes sense?) which made 17 about as old as I could make her at that time.

*Pregnant at 18 or 19 is just, “wow, you’re young, and this was probably a bad idea, and you’re not ready… but you’re also a legal consenting adult and this isn’t some kind of cause for moral panic, just kinda trashy…” territory, and not like a big controversial, 90s-dark-age, comic-selling gimmick, you know?

2001: JOKER’S LAST LAUGH

Joker dies of cancer (not featured on this timeline)

2003: UNDER THE RED HOOD, & WAR GAMES

Bruce is 58, Dick is 40, Babs is 48, Tim is 26

Helena is 35, Steph & Cass are 21

Jason is “24″ - returns in Hush plot

Jean-Paul is 34 - “dies”

Ra’s al Ghul killed by Nyssa ah Ghul (not featured on this timeline)

In 1 year…

22yo Steph will be “murdered”

25yo Jason will return as Red Hood

2006: ROBIN: WANTED

Cass is 24 - begins long process of beating up her family

kills Nyssa al Ghul (not featured on this timeline)

In 1 year...

Cass will take over the League of Assassins

2007: BATMAN AND SON

Bruce is 62, Dick is 44, Babs is 52, Jason is “28,″ Tim & Kate are 30

Damian is 11 - becomes the 5th Robin

Renee is 37 - becomes The Question

In 1 year…

63yo Bruce Wayne will “die”

29yo Jason will don the Red Robin mantle w/Challengers

Kind of like in Arkham Knight, I LOVE the idea of Jason returning to a Gotham where the Joker has been confirmed dead.  So, instead of just going to Arkham and asking Joker what’s up with the new copycat Red Hood, everyone has to legit wonder: Did he just fake his death?/Was he resurrected?  Is Joker back?

I made Jason’s return at age 25 because it mirrored Bruce’s start as Batman. There wasn’t really a good anchor otherwise, but I might nudge that date around, if only because resurrected Jason being “younger” than Tim is super weird.  My other angle here was to determine how long Jason was training for his return, and determine his resurrection that way.  (Comics have made it that he was resurrected within the same year he died, but that feels frivolous to me, so whatever my final version, I’ve opted to let Jason stay dead for at least a full year.)

There’s also the whole 2010s decade, but that’s less relevant to my Jason story’s timeline.  But, yeah... this has highlighted some interesting points for me to play with!  Like that fact that Jason…

…is almost the same age as the Dynamic Duo itself

He’s never known a world without Batman & Robin in it

…is the version of Robin Tim, Kate, Steph & Cass all think of first, since he was Robin when they were kids, not Dick.

And in fact they all would only ever know of Dick as Nightwing.

…got captured and killed by Joker right after Barbara got shot

He DEFINITELY should’ve been motivated to kill Joker by that, instead of the random biological mom smuggling drugs in Iran plot

…was resurrected right around the same time that Damian was conceived, and that Calvin began training as a Talon prospect

makes interesting parallels about different plans to replace Batman all forming right around the same time; with Bruce entering his 50s and having just lost to Bane

…showed back up in the same year that Azrael died

I think it’d be cool if those were more closely linked, instead of Azrael just being shot by a couple of C-listers

…comes back to start a gang war with Blackmask and yell at Bruce about dead Robin issues at the same time Steph gets killed by Blackmask while trying to execute Bruce’s plan to take over the mob.

How can I not take advantage of that for more drama?

Also, not part of my fic, but how cool that Duke and Harper were born in the middle of the Gotham earthquake in Cataclysm?  And with Damian having lost a year to being dead, he’s the same age as Duke, which kinda makes Duke not wanting the Robin mantle a little more interesting.

I find it funny that kids in Gotham are really consistently traumatized at the age of 8 for some reason: Bruce, Dick, Jason, Helena, Cassandra, Calvin...

Half the Batgirls were in fact grown ass women and not “girls,” when they started in on the vigilante racket and I’m tempted to just combine them with the Batwoman legacy a ditch the weird nubile/infantilism fixation comic creators have on forcing them to hover around 18-20 while all the guys hover closer to 30.

And I’m trying will all my might to fight the compulsion to do a timeline for the Teen Titans, because knowing the Robins’ ages puts a pretty narrow frame on the other Teen Titans’ ages at any given time, but by god the fact that they keep reusing the New Teen Titans roster but for EVERY new Robin is a maddening paradox...

Don’t even get me started on that fact that now I get to go map all the Gotham Rogues and figure out just how long they’ve each been up to their bullshit, and who’s still rolling around Gotham in, like, a wheelchair at age 80, menacing the Bat...

[waezi2okko]

Top Ten OK KO episodes

In the "Incredibles" movie, the bad guy Syndrome plans on staging a fight to become a famous superhero. And when he eventually becomes too old for that, he plans on selling his technology so anyone can become super, arguing that if EVERYONE is super... no one is.

"OK KO, Let's Be Heroes" has a different view on this. In the show, EVERYONE is super, so everyone are AWESOME!

"OK KO" is one of those shows that are so wholesome and fun that you stop thinking about logic and just accept this strange world of heroes and villains who takes inspiration from video games, comicbooks, action movies, mangas and more stuff hero-related. It has a feel of a game being played in a sandbox by kids who brought their random toys and are just going with it.

In the show, our main character is KO, a 6-11 year old kid who wants to become a hero. In order to get experience and be more familiar with the world of heroes, KO takes a job in a bodega run by his idol Mr. Gar. KO befriends Enid and Rad, the teens who works in the store as well, and assists them in running the bodega as well as defending it from destruction whenever the evil scientist Lord Boxman(who lives at the other side of the street) attacks the bodega with his evil robot children.

Yeah, it's kinda silly:P But in an awesome way.

Besides the humor, the creative character designs and the many references that will make you feel old if you get them, it is also the modern cartoon show that I think does the best relationships as well developing said relationships(sorry Steven Universe). Anyways, made this blog because I feel my main one has too much OK KO stuff, so I will start of this one with a top ten of the best episodes of the series.

Number 10: We Messed Up.

I HAVE to include this episode on the list since it was the first I watched.

Mr. Gar is out, and he has SPECIFICALLY told his employees to stay away from his office.

... So they go to his office. And breaks his stuff. The three friends must figure out how to stall their boss as well as how to replace the picture of KO's mom(that he for some reason has) so Mr. Gar won't be... disappointed!

I HAD to include this episode on the list since it was the first OK KO ep I watched. Also, a lot of lore was revealed in this episode, leading up to future episodes and storylines as we learn that Mr. Gar used to be on a superhero team with KO's mom Carol AND that Mr. Gar apparently used to be a masked wrestler. That, and the episode is just plain funny, mostly because of Mr. Gar being extra as heck!

Number 9: Whacky Jaxxyz

When KO gets introduced to the game and toy Whacky Jaxxyz by his cool classmate Nanini, KO jumps aboard the trend and even enters a tournament with Nanini.

Buuuut then they meet other people who play Whacky Jaxxyz as well and realize that the game's fandom is rather toxic.

And by "rather", I mean "VERY".

As a kid from the late 90s and early 00s, I can relate to this episode since I collected stuff such as Bayblades, Yugioh cards and such. I still feel cheated sometimes by the Yugioh franchise as well as being irritated by the fans of it who can sometimes ruin it for me. This episode shows how something fun can get ruined by both the people who provides it as well as the people who obsess over it.

Also, famous YouTuber ProZD is guest star:)

Number 8: Let's Watch the Boxmore Show

When KO and his friends are about to defend the bodega against another robot attack from Boxmore, they realize that they don't have to lift a finger since the robots are fighting EACH OTHER. Wanting to know what is going on, Mr. gar gives his employees permission to use his monitor room since he has hacked the surveillance cameras of Boxmore, allowing them to see what is going on in the robot factory. Our heroes realize that there is a competition in Boxmore, EXTREMELY similar to a reality TV-show. KO, Rad and Enid ends up getting addicted to watching the "show", even rooting for their favorite robot and ends up quarreling about who deserves to win or lose.

I grew up in the golden age of reality TV-show and can recognize the stereotypes WAY too well, both the contestants as well as the fans who obsess over the shows. This was just such a stupidly hilarious episode to watch. And Christopher Niosi who voices minor characters was on the top of his game in this episode.

Also, if you don't know Christopher Niosi, you should check out his YouTube channel.

Number 7: My Dad Can Beat Up Your Dad

KO gets in an insult contest with another kid named Chameleon Junior. And like all kids, Chameleon Junior argues that his dad could beat up KO's dad. And this specific insult gets to KO since... well, he DOESN'T have a dad. So he tells CJ that he might not have a dad, but that his mom Carol can beat anyone up. The two boys part ways to get their parents to fight to prove who has the stronger dad/mom. Carol tries to teach KO a lesson about talking things out, and... yeah, things escalate when a godzilla-sized chameleon dad is involved.

I was tempted to place this episode on the number one spot imply because watching a very angry hand-to-hand fighter mom beat up a giant lizard was amazing. But the ending twist that is a reference to old Godzilla movies was clever as heck. Chameleon Senior is revealed to actually being a giant man in a lizard costume, kinda like how old Godzilla movies had a man in such a costume.

Number 6: T.K.O.

KO is frustrated since he still doesn't have powers like Rad and Enid and worries that he will never become a true hero.

But then he meets a shadowy figure who tells him that he can help him reach his true potential.

... Yeah, KO shouldn't have trusted the guy.

I kinda knew from the start that KO would end up having an evil side that made him powerful, especially since he looks so much like Ryu from Street Fighter. But the way his dark side(AKA Turbo KO) is introduced is actually rather creative. It isn't anger that makes KO go dark, it is a combination of a whole lot of negative emotions that appears when he feels insignificant. That means that TKO has much more potential than just being a little angry monster, he is all of KO's negative emotions, including sadness, frustration and depression.

Number 5: Red Action To The Future

One of Enid's friends is a timetraveler called Red Action. When Red is getting a call from her Power-Ranger like team that tells her to return to the future, Enid is too proud to tell her not to go, fearing that Red would think less of her for being "clingy." But all Enid gets out of it is that Red is busy fighting a war in the future, and whenever she sees her again, it is only for short visits, and Red has aged months and years every time Enid sees her. Red ends up having lived a whole life in what was minutes for Enid.

With a show like OK KO where timetravel is a thing, you can have episodes that tackles with friends who doesn't say things to each other due to a mix of pride and shame, then realize that they missed their chance and a lifetime has passed. Enid gets to experience this much faster since Red is in the future, so time is relative.

Number 4: Rad Likes Robots

After an intense battle between the bogeda workers and the evil robots, one of the robots named Shannon gets hit by lighting and then falls in love with Rad who quickly becomes infatuated with the robot as well.

So, yeah. This is the Romeo and Juliet episode. But unlike other cartoon shows, this one does Romeo and Juliet right, if you ask me.

I actually mad e a whole blog about the episode that you can read RIGHT HERE.

Number 3: Know your Mom

KO's mom Carol is one of the strongest people in Lakewood next to Mr Gar. So it is sort of weird that she isn't a big-time superhero and instead just runs a fitness center.

When KO does research on his mom for Mother's Day, he finds out that she actually USED to be a big-time superhero. She was known as Silver Spark and was a member of the world's greatest superhero team POINT(Powerful Operatives Investigating and Neutralizing Trouble). But then she decided to quit the team 6-11 years ago. KO is horrified since HE is 6-11 years old, so he believes that he might be the reason to why Carol left POINT. So KO decides to call her archenemy and make him come fight her as the perfect gift.

What really sells this episode is Carol's old enemy Succulentus who is voiced by Jonathan Davis, the leading vocalist of the nu-metal band Korn. Most of his dialog has references to nu-metal songs, most of them I actually caught, making me feel old, especially since Succulentus is an old fart. Sure, he is old because he is a cactus, but it is still funny to be reminded of music you grew up with that is now considered "old".

Number 2: You're in Control

This was an awesome season one finale! Not only did it have an epic battle, it had been built up to through the whole season, making it that much more satisfying to watch. And it even had one heck of a cliffhanger that made me even more hyped about season two.

Number 1: Special Delivery

Enid and Rad are KO's best friends and pseudo older sibling. But they are also each others' best friend. So "Special Delivery" is an interesting episode since it focuses on Enid and Rad relationship without KO involved.

Someone has ordered a package from Mr. Gar's bodega, so Rad and Enid have been given the task of delivering it while KO stays in the store. The one who ordered it is in a town far away, so it is roadtrip time!

Rad and Enid actually has fun being together while driving to Neo Riot City... But Enid ends up having too much fun on Rad's expense.

Best friendship episode of the whole series since it focuses on communication and what the lack of it can cause since you can end up unintentionally hurt someone who is important to you. Also has the awesome and cliche song "I Wanna Get Out of Here" written by William Gibbons who is songwriter for the band Kara's Walk Home.

[theresnosafeharbor4myships]

Chapter 8 of my Caryl fic Through the Storm is here! This fic takes place during & after ep 9x16 “The Storm.” Chapter 1 can be found here, chapter 2 here, chapter 3 here, chapter 4 here, chapter 5 here, chapter 6 here, chapter 7 here.

Through the Storm: Chapter 8 - Redressed (also on 9L)

“I hear home calling, whispering familiarly, beckoning me back.”  - Tyler Knott Gregson

_________________________________

Carol perused the aisles of the small warehouse that sat in the middle of the compound, a structure they’d built after the war, Michonne had explained as she’d shown her and Lydia around their new home. “After we raided that museum for farm equipment, everyone started calling things by antiquated names. Aaron’s still collecting car and bike parts and tools, and he keeps track of the tack for the horses…they call it the livery. The supply building is called the Merc—though I’m not sure if it stands for merchandise or mercantile. And as head of security, they call me the sheriff.” Michonne good-naturedly rolled her eyes.

“Clever,” Carol smirked as they’d approached the warehouse, amused at the moniker more than she’d ever been with her own. Michonne wore her title with honor; she’d suffered hers with barely contained annoyance.

Then why’d you put up with it for so long? a nasty voice inside chided.

She’d clenched her jaw, pushing the question aside as she opted to roam through the Merc while Michonne took Lydia around to introduce her to the rest of the community.

Well-stocked in some sections, nearly bare in others, the place did have an old-timey feel to it, with wooden shelving and note card-sized signs indicating where things belonged, a far cry from the large grocery and big-box stores from Before.

Michonne had let Carol enter without Maureen, the woman who manned the facility, knowing she’d only take what she needed. “You’ll find some strange things in there. We keep whatever we can find or grow, and when someone passes…we clear out their house and prep it for whoever might come along,” Michonne had explained solemnly.

Carol wondered who her house had belonged to.

She shook her head to chase the maudlin away and continued along the aisle, grabbing a few jars of preserved vegetables, no doubt from the Hilltop, and some peas, carrots, and winter kale. The groups, including the Kingdom, had done well with their year-round gardens, and she’d learned green vegetables could grow even through the harshest winter, something she tried to remember when the terrain of her life felt the bleakest.

She rounded the last of the food aisle to check out the far side of the warehouse where she found a random assortment of things: picture frames and kitchen utensils and jewelry, backpacks and blankets, candles and clothes, books and board games, and even paints, crayons, and sporting equipment.

Rifling through the women’s clothing, she grabbed a pair of pants, some socks, and undergarments, stuffing them into the backpack she’d claimed, careful not to break the few candles she’d grabbed, before moving to look through the shirts. Her hand instinctively went to the muted gray and brown shirts, wondering if there was a size that fit her. No matter, she’d make something work considering she didn’t have anything other than what she wore.

Suddenly a mauve shirt caught her eye, and her hand moved to the soft cotton, lingering as her mind wandered.

What had become of her? Not her as a mother or a wife or a faux queen, but her as a woman? Had she…had she hidden so deeply that she’d lost herself? Wearing drab pants and shirts that gave her no shape, her hair too long and lacking any style other than the times she chose to tie half of it back out of her face. When had she stopped acting as her own agent and fallen into yet another role of the dutiful wife skilled at invisibility?

Oh, she’d convinced herself she kept her distance from that old skin, but now knew she’d quietly succumbed to it. She could protest all she wanted with her mouth, but her behavior, her physical appearance, even her demeanor in the years prior to this mess with Alpha, spoke of a compliant, docile, obedient wife.

Carol retreated from the shelf until her back hit the wall, then she slid down to her seat, the backpack falling beside her.

She’d played the part. Like she had with Ed. With Tobin. And now she could add Ezekiel to the list. She’d thought she could be with those men and stay whole. But each time she’d slipped seamlessly into a costume and played her role, to the detriment of herself. Marriage had a way of suffocating her.

But no, she realized, it wasn’t marriage. It was marriage to the wrong person.

She’d revealed a small part of herself to Ezekiel all those years ago. And from that, he’d thought he knew her. Knew her. And she’d let him believe that lie, had perpetuated it for years.

He’d pursued her, and eventually she’d liked it. Liked that after all the years of hell she’d spent with Ed that someone kind, compassionate, and maybe a little too soft for this world—even though he’d annoyed the hell out of her at first, and still did at times with his charade—had chosen her.

She’d chosen Henry, and Ezekiel had chosen her.

And she’d lost everything in the end. Her friends and family. Her son. Her marriage. But more importantly, herself.

A burning took up residence in her chest, and she wanted to let it consume her, this fire of self-hatred. Maybe she’d combust right there on the floor in the place her latest pretense had begun so many years ago.

You gotta forgive yourself for wanting a place to heal. Daryl’s voice came to her, tender, empathetic, warm, compassionate. And oh so compelling.

He’d left with Aaron and Siddiq not two hours ago after stopping by to check on her.

“Heading to go get the animals,” he’d explained unnecessarily. “’Chonne said she’d come by in a while and show you and Lydia around.”

All bundled up for warmth, he’d filled her front doorway, a welcoming sight after the restless night she’d spent with memories of all they’d lost since the last time she’d stayed at Alexandria haunting her.

She gave him a small smile. “Sounds good. I’ll keep an eye on her.”

He nearly smiled himself. “Thanks. Should only be gone a few days.”

“Stay safe.”

The words slipped out just before the memories attached to them surfaced, and suddenly they were back at the prison, eons ago, lifetimes before. They’d said it to each other hundreds of times since he’d found her in that isolation cell and brought her back to their fold.

Just like he was doing now…

“Nine lives.” He said it with a hint of amusement, his tone giving away much more than his expression, and then he’d nodded and turned to leave.

She’d come back once before from the brink. Maybe she could this time too.

Forgive yourself.

She’d told him she’d try. Try to understand why she’d made such catastrophic choices, why she’d chosen to hide inside herself and behind the dull façade.

She didn’t have to do that anymore. Not here.

Her eyes flew to the mauve-colored shirt again, and she stood up, sorting through the clothing before her. In the end, she settled on a medium green sweater and two long-sleeved shirts, one coral, one red.

Folding them into her bag, she swung it on her back, making her way towards the front of the Merc, her eyes roaming the shelves as she moved.

She stopped abruptly in front of the jewelry, a strange mix of costume, kids, and faded real jewelry pieces all thrown together, though separated by type. Picking through the earrings, she grabbed a pair of small pearls.  

As she turned to leave, her eyes alit on a small collection of wedding rings, both men’s and women’s, bands and diamonds, and instinctively she reached into her pocket for the ring Ezekiel hadn’t let her give back.

She withdrew the ring and held it up, staring at the gold band that had adorned her finger for longer than it ever should have. Over the past few months, she’d come to understand she’d worn it for Henry, to give him a home, to become a mother again.

That life was over now. Ezekiel hadn’t taken the ring back, but she refused to hold on to the last vestiges of a life that once was.

Without a second thought, she set the band amidst the collection of rings and exited the dimly lit Merc into the bright, crisp morning, determined to discover herself again.

[grailbot143]

I chose last week's closing credits as this week's featured image. This is meant to be a statement.

Welcome Back Everyone!

As I was not the biggest fan of last week's episode and had every intention of wiping it entirely from my memory, this week, we are going to do something a little different. Instead of a recap of last week, we are going to focus on:

Briefcap Frybo

Consolidated lingering Questions

The Steven Universe World

Characters

Places

Things

Likes and Dislikes So Far

Briefcap from Steven Universe: Frybo (S1:Ep5)

Frybo opens with Steven looking for his pants. Pearl comes in looking for a missing crystal shard. She explains to Steven why the shard is important, but he is too busy thinking about other things.

Pearl leaves to go to town and look for the shard. Steven finds his pants running around on their own and catches them and puts them on. Then he discovers the shard in the pocket and goes out looking for Pearl.

He runs into PeeDee in a Fry suit getting hammered by some birds. After some discussion, he decides to use the shard to animate the Fry costume. PeeDee tells the costume to go make people eat fries, and he and Steven go to hang out in front of the arcade. Existentialism ensues.

There is screaming from the fry place. Steven and PeeDee run to see what's going on. They find a super-testosteroned fry costume force-feeding people. There is a moment when PeeDee's dad, believing the costume is still on PeeDee, apologizes to PeeDee for forcing him to be Frybo and tries to have a touching moment with him. Then the costume attempts to force-feed him fries too.

Pearl shows up and tries to fight the costume, but is beaten by ketchup shot from the costume's eye. Steven takes matters into his own hands (clothes) by animating all his clothes with the other 8 shards. When he adds his underwear to the fighting garment army, Frybo is at last defeated.

They have a Viking style funeral for Frybo and send him off to sea. PeeDee and his dad talk.

Episode Over (thank goodness)

Episode Random Noticings

There is a picture of Rose Quartz on the wall in Steven's house. I don't recall having seen it before this episode. Her gem was her belly button, as it is now Steven's.

I like the whole father/son relationship building plot line. These types of plot lines are far less cheesy once you've seen them play out in real life.

I would like to have heard the story of the armor, the infantry, and all the death that Pearl told at the beginning, but alas it was not to be.

I think this is the first episode that does not have an appearance by each of the 4 Crystal Gems. Both Amethyst and Garnet are missing from the episode.

I am a huge norse fan. I have been my whole life. I love Norse mythology and have always been enamored by the Viking's exploits and amazing feats. I had a 23andMe ancestry test done a while back. According to the test, I am likely descendant from Vikings. I realize this is irrelevant, but the 'Viking' `style send-off was a plus for me. So I thought I would explain why. And I told you guys at the beginning that I love lore and history, and you are reading the blog anyway, so I must assume you don't mind too much.

Consolidated lingering Questions

The Gems:

Where do they come from?

How is power derived from them?

Are all the gems the same, but act differently according to. . . something?

How is magic embued to the gems?

Who is chosen to wear them and why?

Why is a pearl considered a gem?

How is the body placement determined?

by the gem?

by the bearer?

random?

based on the attributes of the user?

What about the gemmed enemies? How do they get gems? Or are they created out of gems?

Rose Quartz:

Why does Rose have to die to give Steven his superpowers?

Is Rose even dead?? I don't remember that explicitly being stated

What would make her choose that?

a prophesy?

desire to give Greg a kid?

gonna die anyway?

Did she give up her gem to HAVE a kid or to EMBUE a kid with the gem?

Did she get to KNOW Steven?

The Crystal Gems:

Assumption: each has unique powers, i.e., Garnet doesn't shapeshift like Amethyst, Amethyst can't project a plan from her gem_

If the above assumption is correct, what exactly is Garnet's superpower?

How old are each of them?

It's suggested that Pearl is over 100.

Amethyst acts a bit like a teenager.

Is she that much younger than Pearl?

Where does Garnet fall?

Why is Steven the only boy? How many boy gems are there everywhere?

The World:

The Lunar Sea Spire was known as the Oasis for Gems on Earth, so I know it's Earth, but. . .

Is it in the same Earth that we are in, but hidden from us, or some sort of alternate universe

Are the gems ONLY on Earth? This would make the nomenclature Oasis for Gems on Earth redundant, so probably not

So far, everything seems to be happening in this town. . . are there other Gems in other towns?

Like every town has a team of Crystal Gems protecting it?

Or is this town some center for universal negativity, so the Gems are focused here?

The House on the Beach:

This is more a curiosity, but I wouldn't mind seeing the fight that took off that statues hands

What is up with the living temple inside the house? Beating hearts, waterfalls, a pool for getting rid of evil spirits. Need much more history and understanding here.

The Steven Universe World

This is just a quick list of things that make this place unique. . . no explanations.

Characters

The Crystal Gems

Pearl

Garnet

Amethyst

(dead) Rose Quartz

Steven

The Townsfolk

The Donut Girl

The Fry Man

Lars

PeeDee

PeeDee's brother? (same hair assumption)

Greg

mailman (I know they mentioned his name, and he mentioned a woman's name. . . darn my memory)

Monsters/Creatures

Centipeedles and their mother

Red Eye

(offscreen) A giant bird with a giant polka-dot egg

The Spirit from the painting that possessed *Together Breakfast*

The Crystal Shrimp

(deceased) Frybo

Places

Around Town

Big Donut

the fry shop

the arcade

the boardwalk (home to fry shop)

Greg's van

the car wash

the storage facility

the Crystal Gem's house on the beach

Mystical

The Temple with a beating heart

the storage unit? Greg said it was magical

(destroyed) The Lunar Sea Spire

the teleporter thing in Steven's living room

Things

Gems

Rose Quartz

2 Garnets

Amethyst

(not a gem) Pearl

Centipeedles' Mothers gem

(pants animating) Gem Shards

(maybe? pretty sure) The Lunar Goddess Statue

Mystical Items

Summoned Weapons

Laser Light Cannon

Red Eye?

Lunar Goddess Statue

Cursed Painting

Food (as it's seemingly important to our little hero)

(discontinued) Cookie Cats

Fry Bits

Together Breakfast

(offscreen) Pizza

(unmentioned) Cupcakes in jars

(not food) Cheeseburger backpack

Likes and Dislikes Far

Dislikes

Not a fan of the important role junk food plays in the show

Haven't found much in the way of music I like, outside of arcade sounds (which I dig)

I don't relate to Steven much. He mostly annoys me.

Why is there not a main antagonist? Are we going to be playing monster of the week forever? Surely we'll get one antagonist we can loath. . .

Season 1: Episode 5 Frybo

Likes

I like that all the answers to everything are not conveniently packaged in an episode

I like Garnet. . . and sometimes Amethyst. . . and I often relate to Pearl

I like Greg and his super awesome van

I like that it seemed like we landed in the middle of a life, rather than the beginning of a story

I like the townspeople and their relationships with Steven

I appreciate that though there are some references a kid wouldn't understand completely, there is so far no blatantly adult humor or sexuality even in undertones

I like the whole living temple thing.

Frybo is, in my opinion, the worst episode so far. I consider taking down the star rating every time I think about it.

I just want to remind everyone, I write these recaps after having seen the episode once, a week ago, and often interrupted by my whole blogging thing. I mainly do it for myself to refresh my memory for the next episode, but since I post it, I thought I should ask your forgiveness if it isn’t exactly perfect (or even close).

[summerohnine]

love in all its purity

warnings: smut

word count: 3.9k

summary: dan and phil celebrate their ninth anniversary.

a/n: written for @phandomficfests bingo fest, filling the prompt “cherry lube”!!

[read on ao3]

Warm arms wrapped securely around Dan’s torso, Phil’s cold nose tucked into his neck serving a stark contrast to the warmth of their duvet. Dan could feel Phil’s chest rising and falling as he breathed, still sound asleep. Sunlight streamed in through the cracks in the curtains, yet Dan just burrowed in closer to Phil and closed his eyes. They didn’t have anywhere to be today besides with each other.

The clock on the bedside table read 8:07 a.m. and Dan couldn’t help but think back to this exact moment, nine years ago.

He’d been pacing his tiny bedroom that entire morning, afraid to sit down because he knew his anxious thoughts would catch up with him if he stopped moving for too long. Every time his phone buzzed he wondered whether it was Phil, finally realizing what a huge mistake he was making by inviting Dan to stay with him and deciding to call it off.

Thinking back now, Dan wished he could give his eighteen-year-old self a hug and tell him it would all be okay. The younger may not have believed it, but it still would have been nice to hear.

Dan was pulled from his own thoughts when Phil began to move behind him, his arms tightening around Dan’s waist as he slowly woke up.

“Morning,” Dan mumbled.

In response, Phil just placed a kiss to the back of Dan’s neck and let his lips linger. They stayed like this for a few moments, Dan’s focus falling completely on Phil’s heart beating against his back.

After a minute, Dan rolled over onto his back so he could stare into Phil’s eyes, soft smiles on both of their faces as Dan leaned over to peck his lips. When Dan went to roll back over, Phil grabbed his hip to hold him in place, foreheads touching and eyes closed. They stayed like that for a minute, just breathing each other in. Dan’s hand rested on Phil’s waist and he started to trace small patterns on the exposed skin. Phil’s eyes were still closed, and if he hadn’t been smiling at the touch, Dan would’ve thought he’d fallen back asleep.

Without saying anything, Phil moved to kiss Dan, much deeper this time. Dan’s eyes fluttered shut and he let himself get lost in the feeling of Phil’s lips on his. Even after nine years, it was something he still hadn’t managed to get over. Their mouths moved together in a practiced way, an overwhelming sense of familiarity washing through Dan that made him smile into the kiss.

Dan wished they could spend every morning this way, just lazily making out and basking in the other’s presence. They hadn’t had a day like this in a while, though. They’d been so busy with the tour, then almost as soon as they got home they were being whisked away into a tiny room for hours on end to edit the movie. Any free time they had was either spent sleeping or filming videos, so it was questionable whether it could even be considered free time.

Today, though, they made sure to take off from everything. There would be no filming, no emails, or anything else that meant they had to work.

A small noise from the back of Dan’s throat escaped when Phil pushed his tongue into his mouth. As the kiss deepened, Phil slotted his leg in between Dan’s legs and pushed against his crotch teasingly. Dan felt his cock twitch excitedly, a bulge surely forming in his pants.

Right as Dan was about to push against Phil’s knee with much greater force, Phil pulled away from the kiss, lips puffy and drawn into a smirk. He moved back so the only thing touching Dan was his hand placed agonizingly close to the waistband of Dan’s pants.

“Morning,” Phil said, voice low and scratchy from lack of use.

“You’re a tease.”

Phil chuckled and reached for Dan’s hand then brought it up to his lips, pressing kisses to his knuckles. Dan couldn’t help but smile at the gesture, even if he was currently aching to have those lips somewhere else on his body.

“We’ve got all day, babe.”

Taking advantage of Phil’s hand no longer holding him back, Dan swung his leg over Phil so he was above him, straddling his hips. “But, Phil,” Dan whined, leaning down to place an open-mouthed kiss to Phil’s collarbone, “What better way to start the day than with a blowjob?” At this point, Dan’s lips had made their way up to Phil’s ear, whispering seductively and taking the lobe between his teeth. Dan didn’t miss the way it made Phil swallow, eyes closed in concentration.

Almost out of nowhere, hands were gripping Dan’s hips and flipping him over onto his back, icy-blue eyes meeting Dan’s brown ones.

Phil leaned down slowly, making Dan believe for a split-second that he was about to give in. “Tempting,” he purred, “but I’m strong.”

Before Dan could say anything else, Phil was rolling off of him and getting out of bed, reaching for a random shirt that had been discarded on the floor and pulling it over his head. Dan was pretty sure the shirt was actually his but, at this point, nothing they owned was really Dan’s or Phil’s, it was theirs.

“I’ll go make coffee,” Phil called as he walked out of the bedroom, leaving Dan a flustered mess with his mouth agape in disbelief.

----------

“Can we get our dog a Halloween costume?”

Dan giggled at the casual question, turning to look at his boyfriend who was sprawled out on the couch with his phone held up to his face. “Why do you ask?”

“Look!” Phil leaned forward and showed Dan his phone. On the screen was a picture of a corgi dressed up as a pirate, and Dan had to admit it was the cutest thing he’d ever seen. “We need him.”

Phil went back to scrolling, most likely looking at more pictures of dogs judging by the way his eyes lit up with every new picture.

“Soon, Phil.”

At that, Phil looked away from his phone and met Dan’s gaze. He smiled thoughtfully and set his phone aside, motioning for Dan to come towards him. Dan obliged and crawled into his open arms, placing his nose in the crook of Phil’s neck.

It was nearly dinner time and all they had done was eat breakfast and lunch and lay on the couch with each other. Dan wouldn’t have it any other way.

“You know,” Phil breathed, fingers carding through Dan’s hair, “if you would’ve told Phil of nine years ago that he’d be sitting here with you, cuddled up on the couch talking about our future dog, he would’ve said you were lying.”

“I would’ve, too. To be honest, it still doesn’t feel completely real to me.” Dan looked up to find Phil’s eyes fixed on him, an unreadable expression on his face.

“You’ll never have to question it,” Phil reassured, kissing the top of Dan’s head and pulling him closer.

Dan smiled and nodded. “I know.”

They were quiet for a while, an episode of Buffy on the TV filling the silence.

Nine really wasn’t that significant of a number. Sure, it was a long time, but it wasn’t ten or one or five. It was just nine. So why did it make Dan feel the way he did whenever the number came up in his mind?

Maybe it wasn’t the actual number of years

that was getting to him. Maybe it was the fact that in the last year alone, he and Phil had accomplished so much and changed so significantly, personally and professionally. Maybe it was that for what seemed like the first time in his life, he wasn’t afraid.

He wasn’t afraid of what his future held, because he knew what it would be. He knew it would be waking up next to Phil every morning in their bed, in their house, and maybe one day with their dog snoring by their feet. They would probably get married at some point, although they weren’t in any hurry.

They’d been chipping away at the wall between their relationship and their audience at such a fast rate over the past year, and Dan was ready to tear it down completely. He’d realized recently that since he and Phil started opening up, he’d been the happiest version of himself. There was less worrying about what people could see and more wondering what else he could show them. He was working on sharing the things that made him happy with his audience, things as simple as his favorite kind of pizza or maybe a certain song he enjoyed.

With his cheek pressed up against Phil’s chest, both of their faces unshaved and hair unruly, Dan was happy. It was one of those moments that he would’ve kept to himself a year ago, but why hide it?

So, Dan pulled out his phone and snapped a picture without Phil noticing. He wanted it to be as genuine as possible, and he knew Phil would try to pull a generic face if he was aware that a camera was on him. As much as Phil denied it, he looked best when he wasn’t trying, and Dan wanted to make sure he captured that.

Smiling at the picture, Dan tapped on Phil’s cheek to show him. Phil slowly turned his head and Dan saw him smile, eyes crinkling as he noticed the way Dan’s face squished up on one side, seeing his own face staring in a different direction.

“Cute,” Phil giggled.

It wasn’t strange for Dan to take random pictures of the two of them, so Phil didn’t really seem confused until Dan said against his chest, “What should I caption it?”

“You’re posting it?” Phil’s voice was steady, but Dan could tell he was surprised.

Dan was quiet for a moment, biting at his lip as he thought. “I think I want to,” he said finally.

“Don’t caption it. It’s perfect how it is.”

Dan couldn’t agree more. Holding his breath, he posted the photo.

The notification for the picture being added to his story popped up on Phil’s phone and they both just stared at it, petrified out of fear. Dan wasn’t really sure what they were scared of, though. Realistically, they knew it wouldn’t make much of a difference whether they were “out” or not at this point. The majority of their audience knew, anyways--they didn’t need confirmation.

But what if brands don’t want to sponsor us anymore, or we get pressured to be more “couply” on camera, or--

“Hey,” Phil whispered into Dan’s ear, hands rubbing soothingly up and down his arms, “Don’t worry about it right now. Do you wanna help me make dinner?”

Dan nodded, setting his phone on the coffee table and turning to face Phil. He gave Phil a quick peck on the lips before standing up. “Sure.”

----------

Both of their phones had been left in the lounge, plugged in with notifications off. They didn’t need to deal with the chaos certain to be happening on any and all social media platforms. Today was their day and they shouldn’t have to spend it giving explanations or answering questions.

Making dinner with Phil had been the perfect distraction from everything going on. They’d made it a tradition to cook a meal together every year on their anniversary, but it never really went to plan. They always made a mess and something usually ended up getting burned.

“It’s the thought that counts?” Phil asked, making a face as he removed the blackened garlic bread from the oven. Dan giggled and shook his head in disbelief.

“‘Let’s make spaghetti!’” Dan mocked, waving his hands in the air theatrically, “‘We can’t mess that up!’”

“Oi,” Phil grumbled, nudging Dan’s side with his elbow. Neither of them actually minded, even if Dan was giving Phil a hard time. It wasn’t really about the food, anyway.

“It’s perfect,” Dan said softly, leaning into Phil’s side and kissing his shoulder before grabbing two plates and dishing out the noodles. It was rare that the two ever ate dinner sitting at the dining table (normally dinner was spent in the lounge, a box of pizza sat between their laps and Netflix on the TV), but when they did, Phil liked to go all out.

As Dan placed their plates across from each other on the table, Phil went to work lighting candles and dimming the lights. He always insisted on “setting the mood”, even though Dan would honestly find a meal out in an alley next to a few dumpsters romantic if it was with Phil.

“Thank you,” Dan said as he looked across the table at Phil, a flickering glow cast on his beaming face from the candles. He reached for Phil’s hand resting on the table and gave it a tight squeeze before directing his attention to the food. Phil just squeezed back and did the same, words not necessary in the moment.

They ate in a comfortable silence, feet occasionally brushing together under the table and smiles remaining on both of their faces. When they finished, Dan took both of their plates and loaded them into the dishwasher. He gasped slightly when Phil came up behind him and placed his hands on Dan’s hips. Lips pressed to the space behind Dan’s ear and he leaned into the touch, closing his eyes and sighing contently.

“Do you want to come to bed?” Phil murmured, voice low in Dan’s ear. Normally, Dan would make a comment about it being too early to sleep, enjoying the way Phil blushed when he was forced to be more upfront with what he wanted

But Dan had been waiting all day for this, so he wasn’t going to delay it any longer. Turning around in Phil’s arms, he connected their lips and led Phil out of the kitchen.

Phil’s fingers were cold when they slipped under the hem of Dan’s shirt, lifting it up as far as he could before Dan broke away and pulled it off completely. He discarded it somewhere in the hall outside their bedroom door then attached his mouth to Phil’s neck, surely leaving a mark in the process. Phil reached behind himself and pushed open the door, the boys nearly tripping over a pair of shoes placed haphazardly on the floor. Dan couldn’t help but laugh as he held onto Phil to keep him from falling. Phil just ignored him and tugged him towards the bed.

A guttural moan escaped Dan as Phil pushed him onto his back and crawled above him, fingers grazing Dan’s bare torso and causing goosebumps to form on his skin. Phil hovered above him, hands placed on either side of Dan’s head. Neither of them spoke, Dan too caught up in studying Phil’s face.

Phil had an entranced look on his face, as if he’d forgotten everything just to admire Dan’s features and stare in wonderment. In any other case, such an intense gaze would cause Dan to squirm in discomfort--despite being a theater kid, he was never really one for direct attention. With Phil, however, Dan just reciprocated the look. There was no awkwardness, no feeling of being judged, only love and trust. If anything, the intensity of it all made him feel confident, even sexy.

He’d never felt that way about himself before Phil.

Too desperate to put it off any longer, Dan bent up the short distance necessary to capture Phil in another kiss. He let out a noise of surprise when their lips met but quickly melted into the feeling, letting Dan tug his shirt up over his head. Dan leaned back once again, head hitting the pillow. He hooked his fingers in the belt loops on Phil’s jeans and pulled him closer, spreading his legs so Phil could settle between them.

“Want these off,” Phil got out between kisses, fingers tugging at the waistband of Dan’s pants. Dan just lifted his hips and let Phil slide them off, cock springing free and resting on his stomach. Phil wrapped one hand around it and squeezed, making Dan moan louder than he’d like to admit.

Dan whined when Phil removed his hand from his length but made no complaints when he saw Phil unbuttoning his own pants.

There was now nothing separating them from each other, and Dan loved this part the most. He loved being able to feel every part of Phil, bodies pressed together from head to toe and hands exploring skin as if it was the first time, every time.

Phil moved down Dan’s body, stopping to lick in the gap by his collarbone and suck marks across his chest. One of Dan’s hands went to grip the sheets as Phil came closer to his aching dick, already leaking precum despite hardly being touched.

Without warning, Dan’s dick was engulfed by Phil’s mouth, wet heat surrounding it and overloading Dan’s senses. Dan’s free hand moved to grip Phil’s hair, nails scratching at his scalp in encouragement. Before too long, Dan could feel the familiar heat growing in his stomach and he had to tug at Phil’s hair. “Phil, stop, stop,” he gasped.

Phil pulled off immediately, looking up at Dan with concern. “What is it?”

Dan let out a breath, laughing despite himself. “Nothing, I just don’t wanna come yet. I--I want you to fuck me.” Phil smirked then crawled up to catch Dan’s lips in a sweet kiss.

“Of course.”

Before Dan could do anything, Phil crawled off of him and went to rummage through the bedside drawer. After what seemed like way too long, he finally found what he was looking for. Triumphantly, he waved the small bottle of what Dan assumed was lube in the air and held it out for Dan to see.

“Really?” Dan questioned, shaking his head in disbelief at his boyfriend.

“Come on, it’s nostalgic!”

Dan stared at the bottle of cherry flavored lube in Phil’s hand and laughed, shrugging his shoulders. “If you say so…”

Swinging his legs back over Dan, Phil popped open the lid and squeezed some of the lube onto his fingers. Dan really didn’t need to be stretched, but he knew, for Phil, that it was more about the intimacy of having his fingers inside of Dan than the actual necessity of it. Besides, Phil was terrified of hurting Dan unless he specifically asked for it, so he had to be safe.

The scent of artificial cherry made its way up to Dan’s nose and with it came a flood of memories.

Memories of Phil’s old room with the green carpet and hideous wallpaper, nervous touches and uncharted territory being discovered between those four walls. Phil’s long hair falling in front of his eyes whenever Dan tried to look into them to remind him that, Hey, it’s okay, I love you, you aren’t going to hurt me.

Dan was brought back to reality when he felt Phil curl his fingers inside of him, hitting his prostate with practiced precision and eliciting a moan from Dan’s mouth. Enjoying the sounds Dan made from the pleasure, Phil thrust his fingers into the spot a few more times before pulling out. Dan whined at the emptiness but watched hungrily as Phil began to coat himself with lube, bottom lip between his teeth to hold in any noises he might make from the feeling of his own hand.

“Are you ready?”

“Yeah.”

Dan closed his eyes as Phil pushed in and sighed out through his nose. He wiggled a bit to let Phil know he was okay to move then let out a loud, drawn-out moan as Phil began to thrust slowly. Phil came down to lick along Dan’s jaw, intertwining their hands and gently pinning Dan’s above his head. Even when they were just having slow, vanilla sex like they were now, Dan could usually see the dominant side of Phil peeking through, and he loved it. Dan loved being taken control of in every little way possible, even if it was something as simple as getting his hands pinned down.

Dan moved his hips to match with the rhythm of Phil’s thrusts, pace quickening as they both neared their highs. Phil continued to suck at Dan’s neck, most likely just because he knew it drove him absolutely crazy. It always had, and it always would.

“I’m close,” Dan gasped, tightening his grip on Phil’s hands.

“Me too,” Phil mumbled against Dan’s skin. One of Phil’s hands went to grip Dan’s thigh and push it up so his knee neared his chest, giving Phil a new angle. Dan’s newly-freed hand buried itself in Phil’s hair as he hit his prostate with every thrust. Their lips connected once again, moving against one another languidly. Dan pushed his tongue into Phil’s mouth, the faint taste of precum still present.

Dan came first, eyes squeezing shut and babbling, “I love you, I love you, I love you,” against Phil’s lips as he clenched around him.

Phil came mere seconds later, a whisper of Dan’s name on his lips as he peaked. He pulled out of Dan and collapsed on top of him, moving his head so he could leave a short kiss to Dan’s temple.

Dan’s arms snaked around Phil’s torso, absentmindedly moving his hands along the skin at the small of his back. Phil stayed laying on top of Dan for a few minutes, humming contently at the way Dan’s hands calmed him. It wasn’t until Dan became aware of the cum and sweat beginning to dry between them that he spoke, smiling knowingly when Phil whined about having to move. Dan reached over him for the wipes then rolled Phil onto his back so he could clean the two of them up.

“Will you cuddle me now?” Phil pleaded, turning his back to Dan as a not-so-subtle hint.

“I suppose.”

Phil ignored the sarcasm in Dan’s tone and just backed into his arms.

Though Dan acted annoyed, he really felt the complete opposite. He would always find his boyfriend’s need for post-coital cuddles incredibly endearing and would never even think about turning them down. He even found them nearly better than the actual sex.

Nearly.

“I’m really glad we were able to take the day off,” Phil mumbled into the pillow.

“Me too.”

There was a moment of silence, in which Dan could tell Phil was thinking of what to say. “I love you, a lot. You know that, right?” Phil sounded almost troubled as he asked, as if he wasn’t sure of the answer he would receive. Dan propped himself up on one elbow to look at him.

“Of course, I know that. Why wouldn’t I?” Dan brought a hand up to cup Phil’s chin gently, stroking his cheek in attempts to reassure him.

Phil closed his eyes and sighed, leaning into Dan’s touch. “I don’t even know,” he said as he shook his head and laughed at himself, “I guess I was just thinking that I feel like I don’t say it enough, and I wanted to make sure you knew.”

Dan smiled sadly and kissed Phil’s lips, not pulling away fully once their lips parted. “You don’t have to say it, I just know.” It hurt Dan to see the way Phil’s eyebrows furrowed in worry, so he pecked the tip of Phil’s nose and felt a flood of relief when a warm smile broke out on his face.

“I love you.”

Dan scoffed and shook his head. “I just said you didn’t have to say it.”

“I know. But I wanted to.”

reblogs/comments are appreciated!!

[coeval-magazine]

The Witch Twins

Transmitted from a college dorm room, Robi and Alen Predanič use performance art to create “mysterious VHS tapes you find in the attic of the old house you have just moved in to”.

Let’s start by you introducing yourselves and how you started working together  Alen: We are Robi and Alen Predanič aka The Witch Twins and we are from Slovenia. We are twins, 25 years old and we’ve been living in the same college dorm room for five years. This is where we created our own world. We make our own surreal, eccentric and colourful costumes and perform and pose in them, usually in our dorm room. I mostly shoot and edit the photos and Robi focuses on recording and editing the videos. When we’re finished we post it on Instagram. Robi went to college one year before me. We started listening to a lot of music from the 60s and 70s. We loved the warmness of the sound and visuals of the era. Inspired by that and other stuff like Harry Potter, we transformed our totally white room into a warm, psychedelic looking place. Throughout our childhood we were always in our bubble, creating something and escaping from real life.

Robi: We don’t take life very seriously and we like to challenge man-made social constructs such as gender norms. Two years ago, we came out. Shortly after, we started watching RuPaul’s Drag Race and because of that show we were inspired to experiment with wigs and DIY clothes. Our dorm room really played an important role in all of this, because it represented (and it still does) a safe, cosy and magical place where we could be authentic and creative. We actually used to dress up in women’s clothes when we were in kindergarten and when we were home alone. We stopped, because we realised that boys were not supposed to dress like that. Through the years we used to be terribly embarrassedabout our ‘weird’ past and our sexuality. It’s really liberating that the same thing that used to be such a burden, now makes us happy and proud. 

What made you choose the medium of performance art to concentrate on? Robi: The reason I filmed myself in the first place was because of the cool VHS phone app. I realised I am comfortable in front of the camera while I’m in drag… it feels very natural to me. When I perform, I naturally gravitate towards randomness, humour and exaggeration. There are no rules in performance art, and I like that. Nobody is limiting me, I can express myself how I want to without being afraid of making mistakes. 

Alen: Robi once asked me to join him in one of his videos. It was fun and it naturally became our thing. We also started doing photoshoots together. Performance art is not something that I was originally interested in, but it has become something that allows my costumes and fantasy to come to life. 

Your work together has a very distinct aesthetic. How did this evolve?  Alen: We both like to be dramatic and ‘’larger than life’’. We are expressing ourselves freely and we just do whatever feels natural. Renovation of our dorm room has helped us to figure out our aesthetic. We developed a colour palette that was very 60s and 70s inspired and we customised everything in the room accordingly, it came out psychedelic, and colourful. We continued that vibe with our costumes, videos and photos. When we buy fabrics for our costumes, we like them to have interesting textures and beautiful colours. Right now, we are into looking like trippy life size toys - colourful and not too complex. We also like to believe that we are undercover aliens hiding our big alien heads underneath our headpieces. We both love dramatic silhouettes and big headpieces.

Robi: When it comes to our drag, we like unusual combinations. If we feel like combining facial hair with long painted nails or a short skirt with a headscarf, we just do it. I enjoy making genderless creatures. I like to make my hips, shoulders, “hair” and accessories big. I like to transform myself; to create the most fabulous version of myself and confuse people in the best way possible… When I edit the videos, I like to combine footage of us with the footage of mysterious buildings and beautiful nature. The videos we make can be described as mysterious VHS tapes you find in the attic of the old house you had just moved in.

I interpret your work as very spiritual. Is spirituality something that’s important or influential to you as individuals and/or your work? Robi:I love combining art and spirituality, because that’s the way to make meaningful art. I think by being authentically and fearlessly ourselves we send a message that is very much spiritual. I like my work to radiate a peaceful vibe and we do that through music we use in our videos for example. We also include messages of peace and love in our work by using symbols such as heart, sun and flower in our costumes, videos and dorm room décor. The warm edit of the pictures and the videos adds to the welcoming and peaceful fantasy, as well. My work is also spiritual for me, because it feeds my soul. I really enjoy what I do. 

 Alen: I love spirituality. I am determined to fulfil the highest and truest expression of myself and I know I can do that through art.

What has made you label yourself as a witch? Can you tell me a bit about this side of your creativity and how/if this influences your work as a duo? Alen: Witches fit perfectly in a great fantasy. I’ve always loved witches. We both love magic, mysterious things and places. For me, a witch represents that. I often do magic and fly on a broom when I sleep, in my dreams and I love it. Not to mention, that when we were about 8 years old, we used to believe that we were magicians. We made a secret alphabet, special objects and we performed special rituals. 

Robi: We naturally adopted this label, but we don’t take the label very seriously. We also sometimes say that we’re aliens. We love creating fantasies and by labelling ourselves as witches or aliens we do just that. A witch also represents a metaphor for an unconventional person. We are modern day witches in that sense.

You use very pronounced, textural silhouettes and there is a strong sense of fantasy through theatre. A visualisation of your combined imaginations maybe... can you introduce us to this alternative world you have created? What feeds this? Robi: We are very compatible when it comes to working together creatively. Our work is heavily influenced by movies with exquisite fantasy worlds. Such worlds are mysterious, dreamy, magical and visually stunning. They consist of trippy characters, stunning costumes, detailed set designs, mysterious places and soul touching music. We’re talking about movies such as Shrek, Spirited Away, Alice in Wonderland, A Series of Unfortunate Events, The Wizard of Oz, Harry Potter, Charlie and The Chocolate Factory and Titanic. Also, horror movies such as The Ring and The Hills Have Eyes. I’m very inspired by operas and musicals as well, because of the dramatic body movements and the dramatic vibe. 

Alen: Yes, what we do in the videos and the photos is visualisation of our combined imaginations. A lot of stuff that inspires our world is from our childhood. From a young age we were very aware of beautiful and magical things that surrounded us. Our kindergarten teachers were very creative and really made sure that we experienced a lot of magical moments. We were also encouraged to be creative by our grandma. Her house was always well decorated and we used to draw, make jewellery and decorative napkins from paper when we were at her house. We loved fantasy and magic and we still love it as much as we used to when we were kids. Major influence from many years ago are sticker albums and beautiful illustrations from children’s books. 

When it comes to forming new concepts or beginning a new creative venture, how do you normally begin? Alen: We usually start with a colour palette, or with ideas about our headpieces. We then draw a sketch of the full costume. Sometimes we have a concept about the universe our costumes and characters come from, but most of the time, each of us just does our own thing and at the end it works out.

Can you tell us anything about what you’re working on right now? Robi: I am making a music video for an artist. We will soon start working on some of our last costumes in our college years era.  We are moving out in three months.

Alen: I am working on my music. I am also a singer and I’m looking forward to finally sharing my music. We are also working on prints of our work.

What does the future hold, where would you like to see your work in 5 years? Robi: I want to continue filming with my phone app and make costumes and short movies. I’m also interested in performing live. Alen and I want to make an exhibition and publish a picture book of our work.

Alen: I definitely see myself on stage, singing in crazy outfits. Robi and I will continue to collaborate creatively on different things, because we love to work together.

courtesy ALEN PREDANIC and ROBI PREDANIC

@alenpredanic

@robipredanic

words KATE KIDNEY BISHOP

@sashasadies

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[nyrator]

Random Ny updates on Ny things

lots of photos, cosplay progress, ffxiv stuffs, life feelings and rotten nyan bleh feelings of insecurity

bought myself a new friend on a whim while shopping with friends about two weeks ago

the costume so far

still need to add fur to the bottom, but apparently I still remember how to sew by hand- need to figure out the best way to attach it, though. The collar I put on like a dress shirt kind of collar, but I don’t think I can do that for the bottom part (other than just sewing the fur backside to the shirt frontside, which almost seems too easy to be right- the cuffs I put front-to-front and folded over afterwards, giving them that flat edge on top, but not sure if I want that flat edge for the bottom...)

the tights, I made a mold of my leg out of duct tape (what a silly idea), but only had enough for one go around, so it was very flimsy after being removed. I decided the smarter method would be to fold the mold in half and cut the shape out of cardboard, which I did.

I don’t think I’ll have enough turquoise paint for the stripes, so I ordered more about a week or more ago... except it was undeliverable, because they sent it to Florida, and now they’re reshipping it, and estimated date was anywhere between the 23rd to Nov 5th, so yeahhhh. Last I checked, it got to the right place (PA), but then ended up in Delaware? so we shall see what happens

Haven’t even worked on the skates at all, which worries me, but the party is planned for Friday roughly (getting my friends together is always a thing). I notice distancing tends to be pretty lax around here, they deal with people on cash registers all day though so they’re used to being exposed and I don’t need to protect my mother anymore so hm (should get a blue mask and put some graffiti on it, though)

Tomorrow sounds like it’ll be friend-crunch-day, helping another friend with their costume and such as I try to fix mine. Haven’t worked on mine in a few days because dealing with blehs, but should get back to work on it (only a few days left...)

ALSO MY BOY IS REPAIRED

they sent that shoulder piece fast, like super fast- It was here by the 21st, mann- this is the piece they sent, arm and everything

First I thought, okay, just remove the jacket and put it on the other one- but then I realize, oh, wait, no that won’t work, it won’t stick, and this new jacket is glued on. I thought to super glue it on, but trying to remove it started to tear the peg, so I decided, okay yeah no leave it alone and figure out how to remove his torso

so I removed his torso, which took a bit of force, but now he’s back together and much looser but looking good, godd

also I turned 29 on the 11th, a pretty uneventful day all things considered. Friends came over the other day to deliver gifts (though one forgot his, twice, somehow), the other was a purple DDLC girl plush and pin because she’s purple (I should probably play that game to completion), the photo I have would dox me though and too lazy to get another photo at the moment

Otherwise playing a looot of FFXIV recently, beat the main story (first one at least), got the DLC and doing the Red Mage things (as a former fencer I am down though critical of my lalafell’s footwork), slowly trying to make glamours for every class, and the latest mission thing I’ve done was fighting Moogles to knock-off This Is Halloween, what a great fight (somehow managed to get like 8 unique moggle weapons and it makes me happy they exist), mainly a BLM/WHM/RDM/Weaver though Ninja was also fun (white mage is scary but Kresna is very good at doing crazy pulls when he’s the tank and I somehow help people survive by the skin of our teeth)

the crew (myself, Kresna aka Kure, my friends Spired aka Yomi, and James aka Sebastian, who only plays FFXIV in order to play mahjong with us), we all really enjoy mahjong now if you couldn’t tell (also Kresna’s character is great and now he’s making a Rivers Cuomo lalafell and we’re all going to be bards in a Weezer cover band, also shout outs to how cute Yomi is and the magnificent pompadour and sideburns Sebastian has)

But now to the less nice things

So, hmm. Still dealing with depression, a lot of it caused by interpersonal relationships, I suppose- My flaws and anxiety-induced communication issues make it really hard for people to feel like I care or am interested in them, I think. Seeing how I hurt people, and being powerless to help people on the verge of collapse or even suicide, it eats away at me. I can’t just leave them to their depression, and I want to stay connected and I genuinely value them in my life, but it’s taken such a toll on my own mental health and I absolutely cannot leave them alone, either- the type who can and would genuinely go through with taking their own life if left with absolutely nothing. I’m not sure what to do to help them or myself, but it’s hard just watching and being the only one who can listen.

Finally drew a Rotten Nyan picture today, but not that happy with. My feelings keep swaying between good and bad, and I think I’ll add more bad in a follow up doodle as well.

I worry I speak my mind too much- to other people, with these tumblr rants, with my tweets, I feel like I talk an unnecessary amount, mostly about myself, but never about what’s important to other people. I feel I make other people feel less appreciated by how little I talk to them or about them in comparison.

I feel like what I want to make makes me a creep, and that the people I consider friends, or at least close followers, would slowly vanish on me if I keep making it. Or I risk getting labelled as something, or being mocked for my creations. It’s a weird paranoia.

I’ve had some good talks with some friends this week that helped me feel more productive, watched some artist stream and forced myself to join another discord for that artist to try to interact with other artists, as well as trying to force myself to communicate and compliment their art as much as I reasonably can. It’s hard, very hard for me, but I need to treat people better and gain more connections.

But these things have been lightening my mood a bit, and trying to inspire me to draw more. But the uncertainty still lingers- Middle Lave for example, all I think of anymore is being mean to them, or remembering the bad or the humiliating instead of making more cute things. Any time I think of any scene, it just gets twisted. I can’t think of any good scenarios, either. Thinking of all the situations that make MLave cut themselves, or cry, or how frequently MLave had restroom issues (I could write pages and pages on that nonsense alone at the risk of it becoming some fetish work or something, I already feel like I’ve written too much about it), nonsense like that. Which, is it fine to just write about that anyway? I don’t know. I’m told there’s an audience for anything, and if people want to read it, they will, and if they don’t they don’t have to, but I’m still scared of pushing away an already existing audience- Followers are one thing, I don’t expect people to keep following something they don’t enjoy, but I guess just people I’m closer to, followers who take the time to interact with me frequently, I worry what they think of me and losing them (though I don’t want to be clingy or guilt-trip anyone either).

I also think of some of the word choice I’d use- it’d be accurate and authentic, but I worry with how people will take it (for example: Lave’s nickname growing up was “retard” or “r-tard” by their sister, and “faggot” by their father, and I know that kind of language is frowned upon even more so these days, but it’d be a disservice not to include it I’d think)

I have a separate twitter for Rotten Nyan though, I just haven’t used it, so maybe when I finally update the comic I can just keep all the twisted stuff locked away on it and the tumblr accounts.

There are lots of weird things I worry about, since on the topic- I feel like I’m just very naive. I see a lot of people enjoy “bullying” my character Dolly, and at times I wonder if I should encourage it, or speak against it, or what. I don’t know if it’s right or wrong, and it makes me wonder if I’m a creep for enjoying tormenting Lave, enjoying portraying self-harmful or humiliating or self-deprecating scenes and wanting to talk about them or draw them, it feels wrong. I think of Suicide Boy, where I feel it takes it a bit too overboard, but I wonder if I’m any better.

Other things I see, say, pacifiers for example, I see them a lot in my pinterest feeds and some artists I follow. First I worry they’re some kind of kink I don’t know about, and if I had them to my character it’ll sully my art somehow unexpectedly, but then I see Animal Crossing add them, so there must be some fashion trend or something to it, maybe? I probably wouldn’t actually draw art of one honestly, but it’s a weird trend I don’t understand I guess, and I wonder if I’m weird for thinking it looks cute sometimes and weird at others.

I guess overall, in short, I’m just afraid of making something that drives people away from me, or being known for something I don’t want to be known for, or something. At the same time, I feel like worrying about it and talking about it so much also makes me a creep, somehow.

Anyway, if you couldn’t tell I’m just rambling at this point, but I should change subjects.

I did lose 10 lbs / 4.5 kg since I officially started my diet two months ago, which is nice. I still am too embarrassed to say what my weight actually is (gained a little bit of weight during quarantine), but I’ve basically lost what I gained this year and am almost halfway to a healthy BMI. Afterwards, I see no reason to change my diet (other than maybe how little energy I feel eating less than 1500 calories a day), so I’ll see how far the diet takes me before it plateaus. If I can be a bodyweight to cosplay Kuja by the time I’m 30, that’ll be ideal (of course, I’d still need to put in effort to get rid of a belly and eat healthier foods, but yeah). Still surviving mainly on 100% whole wheat bread, skippy peanut butter, and kraft mac and cheese / spaghetti with meatless sauce, but in measured portions at least with three meals a day.

Also, mann, between depression and FFXIV, I’ve really been neglecting ACNH- still try to play it every day, but usually only late at night when everything’s closed, so missing out on a lot of Halloween stuff I feel.

[mr-villainous]

all of the nsfw questions

1:When did you lose your virginity?

I was 16

2: Rough sex or soft sex?

Depends on the day

3: Do you have any unusual kinks/fetishes?

Define unusual. D/S, breathplay, spanking, I mean honestly most kinks. It’d be quicker to list what I don’t have.

4: Weirdest place you’ve had sex?

I guess the woods behind my ex’s house.

5: Favourite sex position?

69 or doggy. Oh, and of course the Italian chandelier

6: Do you like to be dominant or submissive?

More often dominant but depends on the day

7: Have you ever had any one night stands?

I had one for the first time like a month or two ago

8: Sex on the bed, couch or the floor?

Bed

9: Have you ever had sex in a public place?

Often

10: Have you ever been caught masturbating?

By my youngest brother, twice, by my oldest sister once or twice, and possibly by my parents.

11: What does your favourite sexy underwear look like?

I don’t have sexy underwear XD

12: How often do you have sex?

Pretty often. like daily usually while Katie’s home

13: Is there anybody right now you’d like to have sex with?

A handful

14: Do you prefer giving or receiving oral sex?

Receiving, but that’s saying something because I /love/ giving.

15: Most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you during sex?

Off the top of my head, not being able to finish.

16: A song you’d listen to during hard/rough/kinky sex?

Closer by NiN

17: A song you’d listen to during soft/slow/passionate sex?

Anything from Random Access Memories by Daft Punk

18: Are you into dressing up for sex?

Like costumes, nah, but like, dressing up formally, yeah.

19: Would you prefer sex in the bath or sex in the shower?

Shower

20: If you could have sex with anyone right now, who would it be?

@mrs-villainous 

21: Have you ever had a threesome? If not, would you?

Yes

22: Do you/would you use sex toys?

I do

23: Have you ever sent someone a dirty text/picture?

No, I’ve always showered before sending nudes.

24: Would you have sex with your best friend?

If they particularly wanted to or if we were doing like a group thing. But if you’re talking one on one purely based on my desire? No, not at all.

25: Is there anything you do after sex? (for example, smoke, eat, drink)

Cuddle, drink water.

26: Something that will never fail to get you horny?

@mrs-villainous 

27: Early morning sex or late night sex?

If I /had/ to choose I’d say early morning

28: Favourite body part on the opposite sex?

Butt.

29: Favourite body part on the same sex?

Chin? I don’t really have one.

30: Something that you have hidden in your room that you don’t want anyone to find:

A broken hand-me-down clock. Sorry that’s not very nsfw.

31: Weirdest sexual act some has performed [or tried to perform] on/with you:

It’s not really that the act itself was weird, but that the situation was weird. Close friend and I were having a threesome with my ex and we both stopped midway while going at it (both of us completely focused on her as he was totally no homo about it) we just stopped, looked at each other, and shared the most awkward kiss of my life. 

32: Have you ever tasted yourself? [If no, would you?] [If yes, what did you think?]

Yeah. Salty. 

33: Is it ever okay to not use a condom:

When you want kids

34: A food that you would like to use during a sexual experience:

maybe the cliche ones like chocolate sauce or whipped cream

35: Worst possible time to get horny:

At a family event

36: Do you like it when your sexual partner moans?

Who the fuck doesn’t. 

37: How much fapping is too much fapping:

when it hurts so much the pain outweighs the pleasure.

38: Best sexual complement you ever got:

When my entire theatre group dubbed me a sexual demon

39: Favorite foreplay activities:

Neck kissing, butt grabbing, biting

40: What do you wear to bed?

Shorts and a t-shirt, my necklace. sometimes just my necklace.

41: When was the first time you masturbated:

Young.

42: Do you have any nude/masturbating pictures/video of yourself?

$5 a pop.

43: Have you ever/when was the last time you had sex outside?

Yeah, I have. Last time would’ve been a year or two ago? 

44: Have/would you ever have sex in public?

Have and would again. Not full on like in front of people, but in public spaces. and were it a legal and fully consensual option I’d probably have sex in front of people

45: Have/would you ever had a threesome?

Yarp.

46: What is one random object you’ve used to masturbate?

A pair of underwear.

47: Do you watch gay/lesbian porn? why/why not?

Gay, yes, because it turns me on. Lesbian, no, because it doesn’t turn me on.

48: Do you like oral sex? (why/why not)

Yes. Are you kidding me? It’s fucking life changing.

49: How do you feel about tattoos on someone you are interested in?

I’m fairly neutral but it definitely depends on the content

50: How would you feel about taking someones virginity?

Hot.

51: Is there any food you would NOT recommend using during a sexual encounter?

Hot Sauce.

52: Would you rather be a pornstar or a prostitute?

Pornstar cos I like acting.

53: Do you watch porn?

Yea

54: Have you ever been called a freak? Why?

Tons of times. Cos I’m freaky.

55: Do you feel comfortable going “commando”?

Rarely around the house after sex when I need to go out to the common area for something, otherwise no.

56: Would you have a problem with going down on someone if they hadn’t shaved their pubic hair?

No.

57: If you could give yourself head, would you?

Yes.

58: Booty or Boobs?

Booty

59: Have you ever cheated on someone? (Why?)

No.

60: If you were the other sex for a day, what are five things you would do?

Masturbate, DP, Flirt with a ton of people, wear a skirt, wear lingerie

61: have you ever watched someone masturbate?

Yeah, it’s hot.

62: has anyone ever watched you masturbate?

Yes, it’s not hot.

63. Have you ever had an erection and someone noticed?

My entire class once when the teacher called me up.

64. What is your method of masturbation? (ie. toys, clitorial, prostate)

1. Hand on cock

2. Fucking rage

3. ??????

4. Profit.

65. What is your bra/penis size?

Average

66. What is the strangest thing you have ever put up your vagina/anus?

shampoo bottle

67. When was the last time you masturbated?

This morning.

68. When was the last time you had sex?

Yesterday? or the day before. I lose track of days easily.

69. When was the last time you watched porn?

This morning.

70. Have you ever bought a sex toy? If so, which one did you buy last? First sex toy? If not, which one do you plan on buying when you do?

Yes. A dildo and harness was last. First was a cuff set I believe. 

71. Guys:Circumsized?

I’m uncircumsized 

72. Which not-genital part of your body do you like being touched?

Everything, but my shoulders, waist, and butt especially.

73. Which genital part of your body do you like being touched?

All of it.

74. Girls:Are you able to achieve orgasm just through breast stimulation?

That’d be wild.

75. Have you anonymously sent a sexual ask to someone on tumblr?

I can’t remember a specific but I’m sure I have.

76. When was the last time you have had a wet dream?

A full on wet dream, I’ve never had. A sex dream, last week.

77. Which wet dream was your favorite?

My first one that involved @mrs-villainous

78. Is there a friend you would willingly have sex with?

Lots.

79. Is there a celebrity/character you would willingly have sex with?

Also lots.

80. Favorite sexual position? 

69/doggy/Italian Chandelier

81. Do you like being called a slut or whore in bed?

Kinda a bit if the mood is right.

82. Are you into any BDSM?

Quite a bit

83. Have you ever wanted to have sex with someone but knew you couldnt for any reason? Why?

There are many people I have wanted to have sex with, there are many people I want to have sex with now, but know I can’t, and knew I couldn’t, because I have a mirror and a front facing camera.

84. Do you like dirty talk?

Yes

85. Are you loud or quiet during sex? Masturbation?

quiet because I am used to being quiet to not get caught.

86. Have you ever been inturrepted during sex or masturbation? Who/what?

Too many times, but a fucking line-up of people.

87. What kind of porn do you like to watch?

Fucking all kinds. Like my kinks, it’d be easier to list what I’m not into.

88. Have you ever confessed to someone that you got an erection over them? What about masturbated to them?

A couple people, yes.

89. Have you ever masturbated because your sexual partner wasn’t there when you needed them?

That’s like, my daily ritual when Katie isn’t home.

90. Have you ever had a one night stand? Do you still keep in contact with them?

Again, yeah, just recently, and I haven’t spoken to them since, which is what they want I figure.

91. Have you ever had a friends with benefits? Are they still beneficial?

I’ve never had a friend with benefits but I’m still young....at heart....okay I’m still...living...so there’s a chance....I guess.

[raequaza]

Hello. It is I. The ask anon. You know by now what im gonna say. The whole 91, my dude! The good ol whole 91!

Oh dear ask anon, I wish I knew who you were XD you give me such entertainment from these!!

Answers under the cut because this is a general SFW blog XD

NSFW ASKS ahead! Don’t read if ya really don’t wanna know

1:When did you lose your virginity?

Erm I guess that depends on your definition of virginity. If you mean when was the first time I had anything inside me (toys) then that was like college? So 4 years ago? If you mean when I let someone else touch me in a sexual manner (fingers), then last year?(And if you mean been fucked by someone, toys or dick, then negative)

2: Rough sex or soft sex?

I’m a sensual person, so I do like it soft, but I don’t think I’d be opposed to some rough sex either. 

3: Do you have any unusual kinks/fetishes?

I don’t really know if I’d call it a fetish or a kink, but I do find male ejaculation quite fascinating. 

4: Weirdest place you’ve had sex?

Nah, I’m pretty vanilla. Couches or beds. Nothing special

5: Favourite sex position?

I don’t really have one...I guess whatever position hits all the right spots the best XD

6: Do you like to be dominant or submissive?

Dominant.

7: Have you ever had any one night stands?

Negative

8: Sex on the bed, couch or the floor?

Preferable to beds for comfort. I have a shitty back XD

9: Have you ever had sex in a public place?

Nooo. Touched/been touched in sexual manner in a public space, but if didn’t go further than a touch.

10: Have you ever been caught masturbating?

Ah yeah probs. But like as a child, as weird as that sounds. Freud was onto something with his psychosexual stages, so I think most children have touched themselves and realized it felt good without really realizing they were masturbating XD

But as far as masturbating as a teen/adult, then nope!

11: What does your favourite sexy underwear look like?

Ooh I mean 99% of all my underwear is sexy. But I really love my black and red pairs. Especially the new pair of red and black panties I got with the peek-a-boo back ;)

12: How often do you have sex?

Noooot often. 

13: Is there anybody right now you’d like to have sex with?

yes.  NOPE

14: Do you prefer giving or receiving oral sex?

Giving. Absolutely giving.

15: Most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you during sex?

I don’t think I have anything really embarrassing. I’m not often embarrassed in the moment.

16: A song you’d listen to during hard/rough/kinky sex?

Uuuh idk Fantasy by Mystery Skulls? Works for both I suppose

Talk like That by The Presets

Maybe S&M by Rhianna or Bruises and Bitemarks by Good with Grenades

17: A song you’d listen to during soft/slow/passionate sex?

Forevermore by Broken Iris

Find a way by Safetysuit maybe?

18: Are you into dressing up for sex?

Not really in a costume/roleplay kinda way, but anything sexy as in clothes or lingerie, absolutely

19: Would you prefer sex in the bath or sex in the shower?

SHOWER. Defs my kink

20: If you could have sex with anyone right now, who would it be?

HahahahahahahamycrushHahahahahahahaha

21: Have you ever had a threesome? If not, would you?

Erm, hard to say. I’d never join a couple who wanted to have a threesome, but if i was in a relationship and both my partner and I agreed, maybe??

22: Do you/would you use sex toys?

Have. Used.

23: Have you ever sent someone a dirty text/picture?

You bet!

24: Would you have sex with your best friend?

Which one!? I have 4 XD But being specific for my bestest best friend, nah. I love her to death but like family, you know?

25: Is there anything you do after sex? (for example, smoke, eat, drink)

Clean up. Cuddle a bit

26: Something that will never fail to get you horny?

Hmm I guess just being with the person I like in that way? Having someone tell me what they want me to do to them is nice too

27: Early morning sex or late night sex?

I’m a late night person in general, soooo. Though theres something wrong with morning sex

28: Favourite body part on the opposite sex?

Always been a sucker for people’s eyes. They express so much.

But I guess hands as well

29: Favourite body part on the same sex?

See above. Its the same

30: Something that you have hidden in your room that you don’t want anyone to find:

Nothing really. Even my toys aren’t really all that hidden. If people are snooping through my shit they best be prepared for that they might find

31: Weirdest sexual act some has performed [or tried to perform] on/with you:

Nah nothing weird.

32: Have you ever tasted yourself? [If no, would you?] [If yes, what did you think?]

Indeed. I think most people have? Human beings are inherently curious creatures

33: Is it ever okay to not use a condom:

Maybe if I’m in a relationship with a dude and we talked about it. But generally I don’t have to worry about that because women XD

34: A food that you would like to use during a sexual experience:

NOOOOPE. I do not include food (or kitchens) in my sex adventures. I am a chef, and I just can’t bring myself to mix work and sex

35: Worst possible time to get horny:

AT WORK.

36: Do you like it when your sexual partner moans?

God yes. Super hot, and it lets me know I’m doing good.

37: How much fapping is too much fapping:

Um...I guess if you’re making yourself raw from fapping, then you should stop. 

38: Best sexual complement you ever got:

Not a verbal one but just getting my partner off so good that they can’t function or speak for a few moments is awesome XD

39: Favorite foreplay activities:

Soft kisses I suppose? Light touches

40: What do you wear to bed?

Depends on the weather or my health. I generally wear nightgowns (not sexy ones) all year round. But if its too cold then I have flannel pants. Right now I’m sick so I’ve got a thick shirt, flannel pants, socks, and a flannel blue plaid overshirt

41: When was the first time you masturbated:

Uhh see above for psychosexual stages, so probably 4? But as an actual act that I acknowledged I was doing, I think 14 or 15.

42: Do you have any nude/masturbating pictures/video of yourself?

Nooooo. I hate all pictures and videos of myself, so I definitely don’t keep em.

43: Have you ever/when was the last time you had sex outside?

Again, see above for touching in public spaces, but never had sex outside.

44: Have/would you ever have sex in public?

See above. But in general no

45: Have/would you ever had a threesome?

Didn’t I already answer this question?

46: What is one random object you’ve used to masturbate?

Bahaha I slim lotion bottle

47: Do you watch gay/lesbian porn? why/why not?

Have seen both. Porn doesn’t do much for me though. Gay porn watching has pretty well all been for research for writing purposes XD

48: Do you like oral sex? (why/why not)

Giving is great, but receiving I’m still on the fence about.

49: How do you feel about tattoos on someone you are interested in?

I like tattoos on anyone, interest or not. Tattoos are neat

50: How would you feel about taking someones virginity?

I’d feel happy I suppose? That someone trusts me enough to want to do that with me.

51: Is there any food you would NOT recommend using during a sexual encounter?

All of them...

52: Would you rather be a pornstar or a prostitute?

Pornstart

53: Do you watch porn?

I have watched porn but again it’s generally for research when I’m writing XD

54: Have you ever been called a freak? Why?

Yes, and because people are mean. 

55: Do you feel comfortable going “commando”?

In my own home, sure. Outside of my house, no.

56: Would you have a problem with going down on someone if they hadn’t shaved their pubic hair?

Been there, done that. Not a big deal. General preference for shaving but hey to each their own. 

57: If you could give yourself head, would you?

Nah

58: Booty or Boobs?

Oooh booty I think.

59: Have you ever cheated on someone? (Why?)

No

60: If you were the other sex for a day, what are five things you would do?

Omg hahaha. I would absolutely masturbate, walk around at night alone (yay more safe), and um...yeah that’s pretty much it XD

61: have you ever watched someone masturbate?

Mhm I have

62: has anyone ever watched you masturbate?

Yeeeah

63. Have you ever had an erection and someone noticed?

Well I don’t have a penis, so no XD

64. What is your method of masturbation? (ie. toys, clitorial, prostate)

Depends on time and place mostly. Usually just fingers. I never get myself off because I get bored really quick but thats ok.

65. What is your bra/penis size?

34 DD

66. What is the strangest thing you have ever put up your vagina/anus?

See above for lotion bottle

67. When was the last time you masturbated?

idk last week or something?

68. When was the last time you had sex?

A while

69. When was the last time you watched porn?

month ago??

70. Have you ever bought a sex toy? If so, which one did you buy last? First sex toy? If not, which one do you plan on buying when you do?

First toy I bought...I think was my warming vibe? Last one I bought was a rabbit

71. Guys:Circumsized?

N/A

72. Which not-genital part of your body do you like being touched?

My waist I think? 

73. Which genital part of your body do you like being touched?

Well, my vagina XD I don’t have a lot of feeling in my boobs

74. Girls:Are you able to achieve orgasm just through breast stimulation?

Fuuuuck no.

75. Have you anonymously sent a sexual ask to someone on tumblr?

Haha I have yeah. Twas something along these lines though.

76. When was the last time you have had a wet dream?

Couple days ago? 

77. Which wet dream was your favorite?

I never remember my dreams

78. Is there a friend you would willingly have sex with?

See question 20

79. Is there a celebrity/character you would willingly have sex with?

Nah not really. I gotta be really into a person to wanna have sex with them.

80. Favorite sexual position?

I answered this i’m pretty sure

81. Do you like being called a slut or whore in bed?

No

82. Are you into any BDSM?

I mean I think a little light bondage play would be fun (me tying them up, not the other way around) but that’s about it XD

83. Have you ever wanted to have sex with someone but knew you couldnt for any reason? Why?

Yes. Because it was not an option to me.

84. Do you like dirty talk?

Uh yeah, it can be fun

85. Are you loud or quiet during sex? Masturbation?

I’m quiet

86. Have you ever been inturrepted during sex or masturbation? Who/what?

Hahaha sort of? Had to take some time to readjust after knocking one of my ex’s figures over off her headboard. We were laughing pretty hard XD 

87. What kind of porn do you like to watch?

Whatever porn I need for what I’m writing.

88. Have you ever confessed to someone that you got an erection over them? What about masturbated to them?

Not someone I wasn’t in a sexual relationship with

89. Have you ever masturbated because your sexual partner wasn’t there when you needed them?

Nah

90. Have you ever had a one night stand? Do you still keep in contact with them?

I think I answered this one too. It’s a no

91. Have you ever had a friends with benefits? Are they still beneficial?

Nooooooo...................

[horrible-monstrosity]

Punchy-liney episode seven: Clever writing is doing the same thing over and over again and explaining every little bit of it every single time.

Seriously, this is dumb.

So the entire point of the fucking time loop plot is you're supposed to be trying to fight fate, change the future, fight against inevitability, right?? So of course the fucking first thing you need to have is a furry little plot device showing up and telling you you can't change anything except what's arbitrarily allowed, which is... so far nothing, becaue the plot says so and the writers are too god-awful to actually write a scenario where the scenario itself has something working against the main character to make achieving their goal difficult, so we have to have a "because I said so" roadblock shoved in there. FUCK.

So it's just a bunch of Yuuta hanging around going "oy boy wow i sure do remember then this happeninged" and fucking doing nothing of value. Except, you know, doing the same shit we've already seen OVER AND OVER AGAIN!

Yoota gets all fucking upset over writing the stupid fucking pun in the stupid book because it means so muuuuuuuuch- no, it fucking doesn't, you only saw it briefly once just about an hour ago from your point of view and it's some dumb shit anyway. Just draw a bunch of dicks in it.

So this random apartment of grils and their fucking friendships is the most iipootaat thing in the universe? Why? Boy it sure would have been nice if these assholes had been, like, developed into interesting likeable characters during the first half of the show or something, right?? How the fuck's this supposed to stop the fucking meteor

So is the only reason the previous Yuutas have failed because they didn't follow the cat's orders well enough? Not because of any actual challenges but because following instructions is just too damn hard? What the *fuck*?

Yuuta tries to keep his ghost self from blowing up, goes into Ito's room... she immediately goes full retard, not even just over the panty shot but trying to take the door of its fucking hinges just because it wouldn't immediately open. What the fuck? Why are we supposed to like this psycho again? And then he gropes Juicey's juicy tiddies and that doesn't activate his power even though a fucking picture of lil babby pumpkin panties did because why Speaking of plot devices that make no damn sense, how does ghost-Yuuta's quantum ghost time-travel work when someone can see him? Or are we just going to ignore that plot hole because now-Yuuta saved ghost-Yuuta from blowing his top all of once? And why did he even bother to try and save ghost-him? He knows there's no point... unless the way the quantum bullshit works means he'd actually get the meteoric bad end his ghost self could just go back from, BUT IF THAT WAS THE CASE THEN HE WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN ON THE ROOF AT THE END OF EPISODE SIX... GUIGSUUESIUUUEUEEUUURRRRRRRRRFGGHFGGFFGFh

And then suddenly becoming Ubermensch Aryan why the fuck did they call it that anyway just fucking inexplicably changes the way your soul is attached to your body in some overly complicated way that's just explained to the audience in way too much dialogue, because the plot of this show was written without any mind to actual coherency and we have to explain how the one thing happened one way one time and another way the other time so we have to add in ad-hoc """explanations""" later on and pretend it's all really genius. Better yet with the body swap reveal coming up at some point they could have just handwaved this somehow for now and had it later turn out that event left Yuuta's soul (as well as Juice-tan and the other one) less well-attached to the body it's currently in than a normal person's. YOU KNOW, SOME MOTHER FUCKING FORESHADOWING.

Oh, actually just kidding. I paused the episode to write that and something dumb happened immediately after I hit play

"Don't you remember, that one time you switched bodies with a bunch of your closest friends you never saw again after that?" You'd think someone, anyone, would have fucking mentioned this before, or fucking alluded to it, or the mere fact of its factuality would have exerted some influence on the events that followed from it... but no, not really. Just, fucking... casually remember that one time something fucking extraordinary happened that has a huge impact on the plot that we haven't even mentioned up until now. Ha ha.

NO, DON'T FUCKING EXPLAIN THE FUCKING SIMPLE OBVIOUS THING THE MAIN CHARACTER JUST DEMONSTRATED HE FUCKING REMEMBERS ANYWAY LIKE IT'S ANYTHING FUCKING INTERESTING AT ALL WHILE MAKING IT SOUND ACTUALLY COMLPICATED. You know what fucking happened here? All that fucking happened is the writers made a fucking Excel spreadsheet, right, they filled in three fucking rows of the sheet with the kids' names, and then they fucking... rotated... the list... once........... HOW CAN THIS BE SO FUCKING BAD???? This isn't the slightest bit complicated aside from the overwrought bullshit surrounding and enabling it while obfuscating the gaping plot holes that exist in what the writers want to do... because, I don't know, they're too fucking hackish to rework their simplistic fucking immediate ideas to work with a coherent underpinning. The fucking reveal was these three kids who we know little to nothing about and have NO FUCKING REASON TO CARE ABOUT got their souls shuffled around in a fucking obvious fashion (because there's only three of them and there's only two ways it could have possibly come out), and that's... it. That's... really fucking boring as your ultimate plot reveal. This is not worth all the fucking convoluted fucking shit that was required to justify it.

Like, here, let me just make this immediately better: Juice-tan is wimpy girl in pink-haired girl's body, the other one is pink-haired girl in the one guy's body- yeah, we leave those alone- but the trick is, Yuuta isn't Pine (what the fuck sort of name is pine anyway by the way) but some random blank-slate or even non-human soul that got succed into the wimpy girl's body when the crash happened. And the first thing that soul saw was the newly minted Juice-tan, who was traumatised and amnesiac due to what just happened and thus didn't recognise this used to be her body, leaning over (him/her/zip/zoom) and going all "are you okay??"... and thus the first character trait Yuuta develops is being in love with this girl. And Pine is the cat or something. NOW FUCKING LOOK AT THIS SHIT. You just fucking develop the three kids as close-knit frienbs (though that would help no matter what the plot was), then you have this tragedy where the group can never get back together again, one of them's gone and another's a psycho villain, but despite this the remaining member finds new love in an unexpected place or something.

And yeah, it really just was a random fucking car accident that caused this, except the car also got struck by lightning! Why'd they all go Uber at that time anyway? Was the car they were taking an Uber service?

8: oh boy more same thign oh wow yuuta didn't even go into the apartment to find pantsu he just went in there for no fucking reason and H-A-P-P-E-N-E-D to find them wow such good much writing w o w

is the villain's fucking "you wouldn't unerstaaaaand" plot just a muh next stage of human evolution plot? fuckin seriously? this is some fucking baby shit. this is babby's first villainous motive. this show doesn't fucking deserve to be compared to Higurashi with this shit

oh look more fucking tragic robot girl flashbacks and she repeats the thing about making gril a superhero and a superhero organisation with only one member that we've already fucking heard but now it's sad tn: "punch" means "five" in hindu

Turns out Yuuta casually broke a man's limbs offscreen, because even men with vaginas randomly turn into fucking psychopaths when le cutey gril is in danger. Also breaking a man's limbs your damn self is okay but just two people dying who you don't even fucking know and who nobody you know likes is just sooooooooo baaaaaaaaaaddd And then they try to play up the cat as sooo evil for saying "two lives are less important than seven billion!!" when... Yuuta just broke a man's limbs with his own damn hands... jesus christ

epitoad 9: "why did you keep this to yourself all this time, Pine?" "lol idek" Juice-tan and Yuuta have an """emotional""" reconnection where he tells her something he knew all this fucking time and could have said whenthefuckever he felt like it but just didn't feel like it I guess so now yuuta can just try really hard not to instantly cum when he sees a panties and it just somehow works now. as if we needed this to make any less sense. yuuta goes and talks to a random bunch of leading physics-cists and they actually give him the time of day for whatever reason. all to know nuke bombs don't work in space. just look that shit up online  dumbass

... It's amazing how much more pathetic some of these scenes are from the "proper" angle. Yuuta in his dumbass superhero costume just creeping on the roof IN PLAIN FUCKING SIGHT OF EVERYONE IF THEY'D JUST HAPPENED TO LOOK UP, and when the time comes he doesn't even jump into action or anything, he just stands up. It's so fucking WEAK. But it's clebverrrr because we did the thing where we watched him watch himself do the thign n now he do the thign we watched him watched himself do right ?????

More of our beloved hero being psychopathic and literally torturing a man by breaking his fingers and interrogating him... jesus fuck.

epipoo 10: how the fuck did yuuta survive and get back to the apartment

So it turn out, everything in this show could have been fixed by just tearing that little bit of tech off the satelight dish so the server hack isn't intercepted... just tell the current ghost-yuuta to tear the damn thing off the satelite dish the day beforehand next time for fuck's sake... but noooooo, saving the world is just so fucking hard wow

no one cares about these fucking kids and their dumb pseudo-romances. guriko or whichever the fuc the brunette was was a whiny little bitch. She gets into a screaming-crying match with the other girl over some toy, sits there and screams about it, then when Pine notices she hurt herself (or the other girl hurt her) in the fight and tries to help, she screams at him and demands the other girl come back and help her instead. Holy shit.

"originally it was supposed to be-" You see how fucking boring this shit is? We know exactly how the three of them swapped bodies, but you have to have Mr. Creepy McFuckNuts tell us this shit all over again like it's something that's just sooo hard to grasp when it's... so fucking simple... and it's not even in a way that gives his, her, its or zgeir'z unique perspective on it (like "I'm supposed to be in your body, but instead I'm..."), it's just... the fucking list.

chiyoo throws yuuta who she just found out was her long-lost friend pine into a fucking statue and has the gall to cry about "muh precious frienb!!" over ito... I feel like I'm watching that Diverisy and Comics video about Kim and Kim again. That's what this feels like. meanwhile gurio goes through the five stage of anime angst in like an instant. "I have so much power! But... I'm so lonely..... :'(" "the guriko i love!!!!!" she cries over someone all we've seen of them recently is them being a whiny little bitch and then yuuta goes fucking insane and destroys his room. and then has a bunch of le emotional flashbacks over characters we don't care about who have been demonstrated to be violent and uncaring toward him. lol. this is so fucking dumb

AND THEN WE'RE ALL REVED UP TO DO THE EXACT. SAME. FUCKING. THING. FUCKING AGAIN. Just.. what the fuck is Yuuta actually supposed to *do* about any of this? If he just broke the robot girl's computer or took the interceptor thing off the satelite dish everything would be fine, but he's not allowed to do that because... reasons.......????? So what the fuck is he supposed to do? What *sequence of events* is supposed to lead to the probem being over when he's not allowed to just... fucking... solve the probem??

Well whatever it is, I'm sure it's convoluted, retarded and utterly nonsensical. Everyone responsible for this shitshow needs to be fucking euthanized, for the good of humanity.