#A bit of a vent

[neahtrix]

(Bit of a vent, ignore if it’s not your thing!)

I miss Umbrella academy so much.

It’s been nearly a year since I joined the fandom and although that doesn’t sound like a long time, it is for me. Usually my fixations lay a couple months but TUA has stuck with me for so long.

It helped me through one of my hardest years of school; with exam season and leaving. It helped me when I was worrying over the next step in my life.

The way I felt during the height of my fixation was unlike anything I’d been into before. Life felt so clear, every day spent in excitement over the possibility of getting new content of teasers over S4. The day we got the trailers, I watched them on loop analysing every detail, the happiness nearly overwhelming.

The community was amazing too: active with such creative people, and an overall feeling of excitement for the new season.

The community is still amazing, don’t get me wrong, but it’s died down a LOT since S4 making it hard to find any new fan content. There are still multiple amazing people though <3

My inspiration for writing new fics is slowly declining too which is hard for me since writing is one of my favourite things, but I’ve become too obsessed with thinking that it’d be ignored and I won’t be able to gush about it to people.

Basically, I miss the hype and activity we had pre-S4 and the realisation that my TUA-Anniversary is coming up had me spiralling a bit.

[onesmolbean49]

A lot of EDEN’s music has been hitting hard lately…

[sapphicyearningbot]

wanted to say something cute but i absolutely hate that i am conventionally unattractive and that will no matter what always get in the way of any romantic interactions i can experience 🫶

[daffythefox]

I was supposed to be exceptional and I can't even hold down a job.

[m0rang0z]

I'm gonna give y'all a context before yapping and complaining my ass off, just a quick warning, that I'll mention 4chan and it's atrocities so, please leave if you're sensitive, your mental health is more important than reading all of this

There was a tiktok video where a guy dubbed and translated to Portuguese a 4chan vent post about a guy that never got invited to his family's Christmas party

I commented something like "he uses 4chan, i can get why he's not invited"

And then a bunch of teenagers started to tell me I'm so mean and rude and said 4chan IS A COMPLETELY NORMAL SOCIAL MEDIA?

MF I GREW UP ONLINE, SHITTING MY PANTS BY THE IDEA OF EVEN OPENNING THIS WEBSITE FROM HOW MANY ABSURDITY I HAVE ALREADY WATCHED AND READED ABOUT THIS FORUM

They compared 4chan to tiktok, a platform we KNOW are filled with kids, they compared 4chan with tumblr and instagram

Ah yes *sips tea* we can't forget that they said "oh 4chan has rules, so it has moderation 🤓" bitch please

Tiktok is romanticizing so many problematic shit, that i have seen a dude cosplaying chris-chan and everybody thought it was cute, and saying "uhhh this isn't chris-chan!! It's liquid-chan, so it's okay!"

At this fucking point i might throw myself into a river and drown ig /s

[failureandpoet]

I'm writing some poetry I love in a tiny notebook and I can't stop thinking about "The water-nymph" and "The Drowned Man" by Pushkin. They're incredible. In 10 or 12 verses he was able to write a story, like a novel, with dialogue, thriller, and a lot to think about, and I know that's the case with most poetry, but Pushkin was able to do something different (or at least those were my feelings when I finished). For some reason he was called the Shakespeare of Russian literature, and I'm so excited to read "Eugene Onegin" a novel written in verse. Am I the only one who never read a novel written in verse? Like full of verses. Idk maybe I'm weird, but those poems and Tolstoy and Dostoyevsky's relationship are my Roman empire. I also may add 'Death of the Poet' by Lermontov, a poem he wrote when Pushkin died. ( If you hear something it's me, I'm crying). And oh sh!t, I forgot to say, fuck!ng Sonnet 18 by Shakespeare. I guess my Roman empire is just poetry and writer's relationships omg. I could rant forever on each of these things but idk, I don't want to be dense.

If you read all of that, thanks <3

[dawns-laboratory]

Been a mix of "7 Days to Die" and "Palworld" together with dad, or "Astroneer" with a friend (Hi, I know you'll see this, we have to continue that someday soon when I have energy)

And then I've been playing "My Time at Sandrock" quite obsessively the last few days. Both because I want the story, but also because I just find the character interaction soothing. Also because I want to get through the story so me and the same friend can play multiplayer together. ...Mostly because I want the story, since Multiplayer doesn't have it in the same manner.

I'm just going to ramble below the cut, but TL;DR:

I'm okay, just low on energy. Likely not eating well enough and sleeping schedule is a mess because of stress.

So this will be a bit about me just gushing, and also just my thoughts and feelings. It's more me wanting to talk to the void, even if I get no reply. It's soothing in its own right.

I won't go on too long about this specifically, but I believe I mentioned having broken up earlier this year. Specifically my previous relationship ended early December 2023.

I still don't feel okay from that, my self-esteem is... Not doing well. If anything I feel a bit scared of entering a relationship in the future because of how hurt I feel, and especially because I have such a strong sense of "I am not good enough". So some days are harder than others, but I'll be okay.

But I've kinda realised now that I have... Not really gushed over characters as much. Not really allowed myself to feel much regarding those, felt guilty almost. So Sandrock has been soothing, as I've allowed myself to bit by bit just sqee on the inside because the interactions are adorable.

...Also me having felt guilty to have to turn down a confession from one of the NPCs, like damn did that hurt- But the NPC I wanted to meet hadn't appeared yet and I didn't know who I wanted to go for. I'd say I'd have to do another playthrough and go for the other character, but at the same time........ I'm very stuck on the character I'm with. An odd sense of safety that I once used to have, it's nostalgic. Soothing, even. If I can find that again in a person irl, I'd be happy.

But currently I'm happy as is with my plan to just adopt a lot of cats when I get a better living situation. Become the crazy cat lady. Frankly- I'd probably be happy just living with cats if anything. I'm okay with that future, it's a good one.

And that's me being genuine because I can't see a better future than having a bunch of cats to cuddle with like come on

Cat person, through n through lmao

...Maybe I can get a cat to call Galby after the antagonist of the Eragon books called Galbatorix- Hmmmm.

[liamthemailman]

A comic

Yay~!

Internship has ended. I'm graduating in April.

I still don't know how to feel about it.

Is this it? Two years of a course I chose because I didn't know what I wanted to do at sixteen?

I'm eighteen and I still don't know what I want to do.

I had two years to think about it.

Though I don't feel like I wasted my time at all.

Met good people. Worked with some of the best crew I could have asked for. Produced decent films. Sweated. Cried. Bled. The works.

Wrote and directed and art directed a queer film that I can't post due to my country's policies.

Doesn't matter. Still made it.

It sucked. I love it.

A project that initially had no support from my other coursemates. Why, I can't tell you.

Maybe it was because it was queer?

Maybe my story was just not good.

Maybe when I pitched I sounded like a madman? To be fair, I had lost my mind while I was developing my script.

The film won class favourite.

I got to go to Melbourne for a class trips. I went with friends.

Friends who abandoned me for being annoying. Made unexpected friends with coursemates. We clicked instantly, if not better than my own former friends.

Had the best coffee ever. Stargazed while talking about ancient Greek gods and planets and stars.

Learnt I was allergic to the cold and went home. I had so much fun.

This course is ending soon. It awakened a love for storytelling and a love-hate relationship with yellow roses. I'll miss it dearly.

To be honest I don't know why I made this.

This comic is kinda shitty anyway. But I made it. So I love it.

[fanofstuff01]

I just had a horrible fucking day

I mean don’t get me wrong I like being a teacher but holy god am I not taking any 8 graders after this one

[whoaaaoaoo]

y’all I’m cooked. so I’m aroace right. and now a close friend has a crush on me. and everyone could kind of see it bc she was like really trying to like lay on me all the time and that type of shit. but i gave the benefit of the doubt even though I was a bit uncomfortable bc yk I do still do that with really good purely platonic friends. but she’s kind of a new friend and I js though ok yea she vibes with me whatever. and i still care for her. like i do really really care abt my friends. and i still count her with that. but like. idk. now im like ermmmm bc I’m def uncomfortable now and I don’t like her back bc. yk. aroace. but i feel so fucking bad ugh like I don’t want to hurt her UGHHH I’m going to confront her like later this week I think tho. I feel so bad. ffffffffffffuckkkk

[unimo]

i apologize for my lack of art lately and i’m pretty much on a hiatus right now. i’ve been dealing with some stuff both good and bad and it’s been harder to focus and also find inspiration to create. today i got some applications and am hoping maybe i can try to work again but it’s a ‘won’t know until i’ try sort of thing. i still enjoy btd and other vns and i would like to make art again but i’m also seeing what works for me and what i would enjoy making. i still have a lot of good ideas that have been on the back burner in my mind that i’d like to come to life but again motivations been hard.

[daffythefox]

Feeling a bit of a human connection and oversharing about yourself, about your trauma, about your deepest secrets and fears, just for the slimmest chance of feeling genuinely connected to someone, only to come away from it feeling hollow.

Because to you, you might as well have been telling them a story from some novel. Even now, after you've told them everything you can think of that might let them in on who you are, it's still not enough. The problem was never the being known. You aren't able to build those bridges in the first place. You got burned so badly your body took away the ability for you to do so. So you just have to watch your relationships from a distance, safe but just so far away.

You finally work up the nerve to touch your friend, to hug them, and you phase right through them. And while you're stunned, trying desperately to do anything to make contact, the other person looks down at you and says "it's so nice to finally be able to hug you like this". And you want it to happen so bad, you pretend like it's happening, but you have to wrap your mind around the fact that you felt nothing.

And you're terrified you'll never be able to.

[honeyed-latte]

I think some peoples emotional attachment to a character is something sacred. Whether its because a person sees a reflection of themselves in the character, the character fulfills a lack of comfort or safety in the person's life, or even just that they have a massive crush on the character.

It's something so human and so vulnerable, and sweet.

So I'd just like to reassure fans that you aren't weird for relating to Shadow The Hedgehog, you arent stupid for feeling safe watching Doctor Who, and you definitely arent creepy for getting butterflies about Spiderman.

You're only human and we need to feel community, to feel safe, to feel loved

And we deserve it too.

[thegrinningghost]

trying to create, write and draw, because I left some stories in the dust for a while, but I’m also kind of really burnt out and was really sick recently, so it may be a while.

anyway, I just wanted to say, if you requested a story from me, or I said I’d write something and your were interested—anything along either of those lines—just know that I’m coming back to them, it’ll just be a bit

[stoopidpigeonxx]

my stepdad threatened to give away, or worse, put down my 2 year old dog. He's a great pyrenees/ husky mix, and he's somewhat aggressive sometimes. He's not all that smart. He's had the cops called on him. But he's my fucking baby. I love him so much, if he gets taken away from me I'm burning this whole bitch down.