#Black Truffle Honey

[blackdoghoney]

Black Truffle Honey: A Culinary Delight of Richness and Complexity

Black truffle honey is an exquisite and slightly decadent fusion of two gastronomic delicacies. It has found its way into the hearts of food enthusiasts around the world. Our unique Raw honey combined with the earthy, intense flavors of premium black truffles creates a culinary experience that is a must for any food or grassing platter. Shop Now : https://blackdoghoney.com.au/product/black-truffle-honey/

[davidwhornii-blog]

French Ham and Pear Crostini with Truffle Honey

Another way to eat deliciously and light with the summer heat raging on. Try this easy, make-ahead recipe for ham-wrapped pear with arugula and ricotta cheese. In the summer, sub out the pear for seasonal stone fruit or fresh figs. Avoid using any type of melon because of the very highwater content.

For this recipe, please go to:

https://creativeelegancecatering.blogspot.com/.../french...

For hundreds more delicious recipes and mouthwatering food images, please go to:

[santinoelliott]

Black Garlic Chocolate Protein Bites Black garlic is naturally sweet and pairs perfectly with chocolate in these nutty, protein-rich truffles.

[wrandonbu]

Recipe for Black Garlic Chocolate Protein Bites Black garlic is naturally sweet and pairs perfectly with chocolate in these nutty, protein-rich truffles.

[l0vegl0wsinthedark]

Reminiscing

~

"Okay, this one."

Lily's irate frustration was a nearly tangible crackle in the perfumed air of the boutique. Draco glanced up over the rim of his spectacles.

"Absolutely not," he said calmly.

Lily's fists balled up in the skirt of the slinky, forest green dress she wore. Thousands of shimmery little beads were sewn into the light, clingy fabric. The slit ran all the way up to mid-thigh and the halterneck straps were beaded strings.

"Why." Lily's question sounded from between grit teeth.

"Turn around," Draco said flatly.

A moment of hesitation, and then Lily spun around to reveal her back, exposed from neck to tail bone.

"Absolutely not," repeated Draco, looking back down into his phone, typing out an email with one forefinger, painstakingly slow.

"It's a dress. You want me to buy a dress. This is a dress."

"I want you to be respectably dressed for your seventeenth birthday party," Draco replied without looking up. "You're coming of age, yes, but you will do so whilst dressed as you ought to be."

"As I ought to be," Lily repeated scornfully.

"As a Potter-Malfoy ought to be."

"Why can't a Potter-Malfoy wear something like this?"

"We don't go out in public half-naked."

"This is a floor length gown."

"The whole length of your left leg is on display, as is the entirety of your back." Draco glanced up once more. "Your whole back. You're practically naked."

Lily"s clenched jaw shifted as she gnashed her teeth some more. With forced calm, she said, "Papa, I do not want to be wearing some sort of Victorian ballgown for my seventeenth birthday party."

"More's the pity. But no, definitely not this one either."

"I can wear a jacket over it." Lily raised one eyebrow when Draco looked up again. "I want a leather jacket."

Draco snorted, shaking his head. "I don't think so."

"Dad said I could get one."

"Your dad is an idiot."

"I want one like his."

"Absolutely not. He's a lunatic with a flying motorcycle. You don't want everything he has, trust me."

"It's just a bloody leather jacket, Papa, please!" Lily actually stomped one booted foot, her voice rising shrilly.

"I'm used to strops, darling, I invented them," Draco said, completely unbothered. "Besides, what would your grandmother say. She would faint."

"She told me to get the jacket in black." When Draco looked up in genuine surprise, Lily went on, "She said black would go best with her opal earrings that she's having reset in silver for my birthday present."

Draco stared at her over his spectacles as she stood glaring back at him, hands on her hips.

Then the bell above the door tinkled merrily, and Harry's voice filled the silence of the stylish little boutique as he exchanged cheerful pleasantries with the owner.

Reaching breaking point, Lily shrieked, "DAD!"

"I will not tolerate that sort of screaming in a public--," Draco started.

"Green, eh?" Harry said, walking into the private area Draco had reserved for the afternoon, his own boots loud on the wooden flooring.

"Because I have your eyes," Lily said in her most honeyed voice. "Grandma's eyes."

"Good choice, Lils," Harry said affectionately, sitting down on the plush sofa next to Draco before carefully picking through the collection of truffles set out in little crystal bowls.

"You haven't looked at the dress very closely," Draco said, voice tight.

"Oh?" Harry popped a hazelnut truffle into his mouth, straightened his glasses a bit, and leaned back, crossing ankle over knee. "Let me do that, then." A pause, and then, "She looks great!"

Draco twirled one forefinger through the air, motioning for Lily to spin. "She's half-naked."

"It's the trend now or something," Harry said, shrugging and scratching carelessly through his beard.

"I want to wear it with a leather jacket, Dad," Lily said hastily. "A black leather jacket. One like yours."

Harry grinned, roughing up his hair as was his wont. "Like Sirius'. Yeah, why not? Let's get you one."

"Harry."

Draco's lips were very thin as he pulled off his glasses and turned the full force of his displeasure onto Harry.

"Don't," said Harry. "We said she could pick her own outfit."

"The Minister's going to be at the party," Draco said tightly.

"Doubt he cares, honestly," Harry said, eating more chocolate. "Besides, it's Lily's day."

"I don't like to be ganged up against," Draco said, teeth gleaming white on a forced, very dangerous smile.

"Babe, we're not ganging up--," Harry started.

"Where is James?" Draco said suddenly, raising his voice over Harry's.

"My ears are burning," James drawled, sauntering in. Draco turned in his seat to look at him, his mouth slightly open.

James' hair was a bright, lemon yellow where it stood in a carefully styled, vertical mass on his head. The sides had been shaved down close to the scalp and dyed green.

Draco could only splutter in apoplectic dismay at the sight.

"What are you supposed to look like?!" he finally managed to ask.

James shrugged, scratching behind one pierced ear. "Dad thinks it looks cool."

Draco whirled around in his seat, now glaring violently at Harry. "He was supposed to get a haircut that's also suitable for school."

"He's still on summer break," Harry said.

"His head looks like a bloody sunflower!" Draco said. "Harry, you had one job--"

But Lily was now cackling loudly at James, who in turn stood grinning proudly, hands in his pockets, fourteen years old and sincerely unbothered about a single opinion that wasn't his own. Harry couldn't help grinning, too, but he quickly moved closer to Draco and took one of his hands with both his own.

"Babe, we've talked about this," he murmured gently. "This is one of those times you need to let go. Remember how we talked about letting go?"

"She's seventeen, and he looks someone cracked an egg on his head," Draco seethed.

Harry leaned forward and kissed him squarely on the mouth.

"How about lunch at the Ritz?" he asked gently.

"And then we buy me a black leather jacket," Lily said, hitching up the skirt of her dress and stomping loudly back to the changing room.

"Life was easier when I was seventeen," Draco muttered darkly, glaring at where their son was inspecting a rack of dinner jakcets.

Harry grinned again. "Yeah. A war, a megalomaniac. I really miss those days."

~

[themisimagines]

i could sleep inside the cold of you

inspired by: the 'aimed at your heart' vyn ssr card content: heavily draws upon catherynne m. valente's deathless, 2.5k of seduction & smut so buckle up characters: vyn, fem!reader optional background music: house of cards by bts; take me to church by hozier; religion by lana del rey; the anna karenina (2012) soundtrack

“A marriage is a private thing. It has its own wild laws, and secret histories, and savage acts, and what passes between married people is incomprehensible to outsiders. We look terrible to you, and severe, and you see our blood flying, but what we carry between us is hard-won, and we made it just as we wished it to be, just the color, just the shape.” - Catherynne M. Valente, Deathless

The long table is laid with a feast fit for a king. Platters heaped high with glistening honeyed confits, crisp crackling meat, steaming vegetables delicately braised, deep tureens of stew rich in marrow, an excess of riches, accompanied by what you believe are entire truffles, a sharp knife laid beside them for you to shave your desired portion onto your meal, black salt glistening darkly under the chandelier, in addition to a dish of black sturgeon eggs, like so many pearls gathered in a heap for your amusement. 

Entering the dining room on Vyn’s arm, you are shocked by the abundance, the sheer extravagance of it all. You are dressed in a floor length black gown painstakingly embroidered with gold thread, produced seemingly out of thin air by one of the maids, saying that Vyn has requested that you wear it this evening. The material is silky against your skin, making you shiver with every move. The emerald bracelet Vyn won at the Umir Festival is the perfect accompaniment. Vyn, is of course, impeccable in his smoking jacket and tailored trousers. 

‘Are we expecting guests?’ You ask Vyn incredulously, staring at the food. ‘Surely Mr. Wechsler was confused.’ 

‘Not at all. But I believe I once made you a promise that you would never go hungry.’ 

‘Don’t be ridiculous, Vyn, we’ll hardly be able to finish this on our own.’ 

‘My beloved, whatever we cannot finish, I promise that I will allow you to take down to the soup kitchen to feed the hungry populace. Such a role is fitting for the lady of this house, after all.’ 

‘I’m hardly the lady of the house yet,’ you mutter, flushing red at the implication. 

‘Before you launch into another complaint about how you don’t deserve such wonderful treatment, may I propose something, my lady?’ Vyn stops at the door and looks quite seriously down at you from the gold rims of his glasses. You turn your face upwards, marvelling in how beautifully his silver hair frames his face, the way his gaze seems to strip you completely bare. 

‘I’ll allow it,’ you say. ‘What do you propose?’ 

‘Do you trust me?’ Vyn asks. 

Your mind flashes back to earlier in the day, during the hunt. Your bodies pressed up against each other, drawing the bow and nocking the arrow. His quiet instructions in your ear, your breath, held for so long you almost grew dizzy, and then, the blur of victory after, shattering the intimate moment. 

‘Yes,’ you say at length. ‘I do trust you.’ 

‘Then I propose that we play a little game. There is no need for you to speak tonight. Whatever you eat will be fed from my hand. Give yourself to me completely, and trust me to take care of you. If you feel uncomfortable at any point, you can say our safe word.’ 

You stare into his eyes, and he stares back, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips. You nod once, slowly. An assent to his conditions. The game has begun. 

‘Excellent. Your decisiveness is one of the things I most admire about you. And just once, could you say our safe word, before we embark on this little journey together?’ 

‘Pomegranate,’ you say, lips parting to let it slide out in a whisper. 

‘Very good, my beloved.’ Vyn guides you to where the food awaits, seating you on his right hand side, while he takes the seat at the head of the table. ‘I remember peeking at the suppers my grandmother used to host here. My grandfather would sit at the head of the table, here, while my grandmother sat all the way down there, at the end of the table, both of them as far apart from each other as they could get. The length of the table being a gesture of power, to be sure, but hardly conducive for marital harmony. I believe they even ate like that when they didn’t have guests, or took meals apart. So much nicer to sit together like this, no?’ 

You almost open your mouth to say something or ask a question, but Vyn silences you with a finger on your lips. 

‘I would not be asking you to do this if it was easy, my love, I know it is difficult for you. But we are nurturing this fledgling trust you have placed in me, and the game has just started.’ 

You watch Vyn’s slow, careful movements as he tears a hunk of golden bread and dips it in olive oil and black salt, the crumb flecked with herbs. He feeds you the morsel gently, telling you about the special wheat used in making the bread and the fields in Svart where it grows. You listen with rapt attention as his voice carries on, moving from dish to dish. As he promises, he feeds you every first bite with his own fingers, their tips gently grazing against the corners of your mouth, leaving your skin tingling and yearning for more. 

Your mouth is filled with rich flavours of cream and wild fowl, preserves and pickles, salt and fat, acid and heat. Vyn keeps up the one-sided conversation, reading your mind to say your answers for you, his low tones sending a shiver up your spine. The wine makes your head light and airy. As the meal comes to a close, Vyn feeds you a last mouthful of dessert, his long index finger swiping away a trail of honey from the corner of your mouth. A burst of words comes from you as you impulsively grab his wrist and then place a kiss directly in the palm that has been feeding you all evening. 

‘I love you, Vyn,’ you barely whisper, voice hoarse. 

Vyn extracts his hand and gives a loud sigh, standing up from the table. ‘You were doing so well, my darling. Like Orpheus, who turned back just at the very last minute and lost Eurydice, so have you lost our little game.’ 

His eyes are dark, but with a distinct sense of amusement and mischief behind them. ‘Had you won, your prize would have been a fairytale ending, where I swept you off your feet and carried you to the fireplace in the hall, where a magical bower of furs and pillows have been prepared, and you would have sweet love made to you all night—’

‘I don’t care about fairytale endings,’ you interrupt Vyn, standing and moving toward him, a defiance in your tone calculated to push him off the edge, to turn his beautifully crafted game on its head. 

Vyn growls and then pounces on you, lips seeking yours harshly, in an attempt to punish you. You kiss him back just as fiercely, biting his lip and drawing blood, smearing it over both your bottom lips, the taste of iron and salt with the sweet still lingering on your tongues. He pushes you both back onto the table, until your legs are wrapped against it and your spine is bent backwards, dress sliding upwards until your thighs are visible. 

When he pulls away, it is to admire how rumpled he has left you, how wanting. Your hair is loosened from its carefully piled topknot, lying curled and ragged around your face, which still bears a slight trace of his blood. Your chest, heaving, the tops of your breasts exposed. Legs slightly spread to accommodate his waist, his face looming over yours as if he is about to devour you. 

‘Since you seem to be evading my best attempts at seduction, I cannot promise I will be gentle,’ he warns with a smirk. 

‘Maybe that was my intention all along,’ you make an effort to retort, although you are aware of how vulnerable a position you are in. 

Vyn pushes the dishes off the table, everything landing in a loud clatter on the floor. 

‘Vyn!’ You exclaim, turning to look at the food, but he lifts you up onto the table, then pushes your dress upwards around your hips, ripping aside your flimsy underwear. You are about to say something in protest, but then his mouth is on you, trailing heated kisses along your inner thighs, hot breath making you squirm even as he keeps a vice-like grip on your hips. When he licks a hot, wet stripe up the length of your cunt, you cry out in pleasure, spine curving upwards to get more of it. 

‘Hm, you seem to be enjoying yourself,’ Vyn pauses to comment. ‘Should I continue?’ 

‘I will never forgive you if you stop now,’ you pant, and then reach down to encourage his head back between your legs. 

He laughs, then applies himself fully to the task, tongue endlessly swirling, and then thrusting inside, all while your hands are twined in his hair, tugging so hard that you are briefly afraid that you have hurt him. He doesn’t show any sign of discomfort, diligently licking and sucking until you are so close to coming, your body a tightly wound mass of nerves. You catch his eyes flicking up to watch your reactions, and just as you are about to come, he pulls away, wiping his mouth away on his sleeve and grinning viciously. You cry out at the sudden loss of heat, writhing in distress. 

‘Don’t you think you deserve some punishment for ruining our evening? You didn’t think it was going to be that easy, did you?’ He hisses, then pulls you toward him, forcing you to turn around. Disoriented from the disrupted orgasm and sudden movement, you flail for a moment, then hear the clink of Vyn removing his belt behind you. He grabs your hands and holds them together, using his belt to wrap your wrists snugly, but not too tight. Before anything else happens, he leans forward to where your face is, brushes your hair gently aside to whisper in your ear, ‘Pomegranate?’ 

You shake your head desperately. ‘Good girl,’ he tells you, stroking your hair. 

Then the brief moment of tenderness quickly passes as Vyn grabs your hips, your face sliding across the polished wood of the table and ass sticking up in the air, your cunt completely exposed, only your legs holding you up. Unable to see what’s going on behind you, you can only tremble in anticipation, the feel of Vyn’s hands roughly positioning you so he can enter you. 

His first thrust is not at all gentle, burying him to the hilt in your hot, slick cunt. You both cry out from the fullness, at how ready your cunt is for him. 

‘Look at you clenching around me, such a needy, desperate little slut,’ Vyn purrs, painfully dragging out his first few thrusts so that despite your limited range of movement, you are squirming and begging for more. 

‘More,’ You beg. ‘Please, Vyn, I need more.’ 

‘You will get more when I decide you deserve more,’ Vyn warns, slowing his hips even more, the promise of more friction hanging just out of reach. ‘It’s my turn to enjoy myself.’ 

You cry out in frustration, and are met with a ringing slap on your ass, the pain tingling deliciously. 

‘Can’t be helped,’ he sighs, pretending that you have forced him to this point, when you can tell that it is taking all of his own self-control not to just thrust into you with wild abandon. ‘You’re forcing me to play my hand, you naughty little thing. Do you want to see me lose control?’ 

He punctuates the last sentence with a vicious thrust, going deeper than before and making you squeal. The sound makes him stop, and he reaches beside you for a napkin. 

‘I think we need to work on your silence,’ Vyn says, hips still moving gently while his hands have left your hips and are doing something else. He leans down, pressing his weight against you and hand coming toward your face with the folded napkin. 

‘Open your mouth,’ he tells you, then puts the napkin delicately between your teeth. ‘Now, bite down. If you let the napkin fall, I can only assume it is because you intend on using our safe word, and in any event, that would mean our little game is over. If you want to continue, your only choice is to behave yourself.’ 

You bite down on the cloth napkin, and Vyn cocks his head sideways to look at your trapped face, giving you a wink before returning to his position behind you. He starts off with slow thrusts again, searching for the right angle, hips snapping leisurely into your ass, the sound of skin on skin turning you on more, if that was even possible. Your soft moans are muffled by the napkin, which is slowly soaking with saliva. 

‘Such a good girl,’ Vyn cooes as he thrusts deeply and you give a low, dull moan, trying to stifle your noises. ‘Let’s see how you do under more difficult conditions.’ 

He reaches down to grasp a handful of your hair, pulling your head upwards so that your spine is arched like a bow, and begins moving faster, each thrust of his cock a blinding shaft of light in equal parts pain and pleasure. If anyone were to walk in on you both right now, or even listen in on what was happening, they would hear a symphony of moaning, Vyn growling to tell you what a good girl you are, how well you are taking his cock, as if you were made for him. Your hands behind your back, back impossibly arched as he grips onto your hair, subject to the pleasure that is invading every part of your body. 

Vyn’s thrusts grow harder and more needy, and your cunt has begun to spasm, craving sweet release. 

‘I want to see your face when I make you cum,’ He rasps, and then pulls out, flipping you effortlessly onto your back, hair spilling out in all directions. Your arms are crushed behind your back, but the pain of your stretching shoulder joints is welcome, only adding to your pleasure. He is stretched out on top of you, mouth hungry, diving for your breasts, teasing your nipple with his tongue, hand reaching down to rub your clit in agonising circles, then slipping back inside you and groaning at the sensation. You cling on to the napkin for dear life, terrified that if you drop it, he might really stop, and leave you empty and wanting, just like that. 

But Vyn doesn’t stop. His eyes locked onto your face, he rubs your clit ceaselessly as he pounds into you, again and again in a vicious, desperate pace. 

‘Come for me, my love,’ he whispers, and like that, you are undone, waves of pleasure crashing through your body as your cunt clenches, legs shaking from the effort. A few more hard thrusts and Vyn joins you, thrusting deeply inside you one last time and then collapsing, his cock still throbbing as it fills you with cum. 

He only allows himself a few moments before quickly sitting you up to undo the restraints around your wrist, examining them for chafing, pressing a light kiss to each one when he finds you perfectly well and unharmed. 

‘Was I too rough?’ Vyn asks, hurrying to hand you his jacket. You shake your head, a mischievous grin on your face as you refuse to drop the napkin between your teeth. He blushes and removes it. You stretch your jaw a few times, which is slightly sore from clenching so hard, but will be fine in a few moments. 

‘Please, Vyn, I would have used the safe word if I was being hurt.’ You reassure him. ‘The only thing I regret is that I’m probably too tired to go through all that again.’ 

‘Too tired?’ Vyn’s smirk returns. ‘I hope not. There’s still a fireplace and a floor full of furs waiting for us.’ 

In the blink of an eye, you are swept up in his arms, and he is carrying you to the door, like a bride over the threshold of her new home. He hasn’t even bothered to put on any clothes, trousers long forgotten, and his dress shirt hanging loose. 

‘Vyn,’ you say, an idea suddenly coming into your mind. ‘You knew I wouldn’t be able to keep quiet, didn’t you?’ 

‘I will neither confirm nor deny my initial hypothesis,’ Vyn says. ‘But let’s just say, the outcome was above and beyond what I expected.’ 

As he carries you to the hall and the fireplace, two of his fingers have secretly slipped into your cunt once again, and you sneak a glance at him, grinning. 

[141wh0re]

Red Spider Lily- Dead Dove Do Not Eat

Pairings: Body Guard!Simon Riley x Rich Bitch!Reader (f)

TW: MDNI, DDDNE, depression, suicidal ideation, anxiety, minor character death, angst, substance abuse and addiction, implied narcissism from readers dad, alcohol consumption, vomiting (not detailed, just mentioned), hyperthermia, brief wlw, NSFW thoughts, soft Simon, grumpy x grumpier trope, fun fact: don't mix MDMA with cocaine lads and lasses (can result in hyperthermia), whump, fluff.

Let me know if I missed anything in the tags <3

Word Count: 2626

Summary: Simon retires from the SAS, taking on a job for a well known real estate tycoon's daughter, serving as her sole protector until her father can find a suitable man to sell marry her off to. Yet, instead of protecting her from outside dangers, he's finding the biggest danger is herself. Simon is determined to help you escape this life that was pre-ordained for you, and cure you of your disease. Addiction.

After nearly three decades spent in the military, Simon never expected to find himself here. Stuck in a contractual agreement, protecting and ensuring the safety and well-being of a bratty young woman with a wealthy family. It was almost insulting to him, had it not been for the hefty sum of money the woman's father wired to his bank account every week.

There were a few moments he'd almost made the rash decision to quit his job completely, and allow the someone else to look after this bitchy damsel.

But there was something that kept him here, keeping a protective eye on you and a firm hand at the small of your back in crowded rooms.

Beneath all the glitz and glam, partying and binge drinking, and the drugs... Simon saw you for what you were when you were at your lowest points.

A young girl who was forced into a lonely life of luxury. A girl who lost her mother too young and wasn't sure how to cope. A girl who yearned for her father's attention while he consumed himself in work, social gatherings, and public appearances. A girl who closed herself off from the world and kept everyone at arm's length so the venomous bite of abandonment would be less impactful when those people inevitably left her. A young girl who drowned her liver in alcohol while snorting enough blow to potentially kill her every weekend.

Simon knew you needed consistency in your life with substance. He'd watched his younger brother go through this plenty, repeating a vicious cycle of pain and torment for a fleeting moment with the impostor of joy in powder form.

He also knew you resembled that of a caged bird. Lonely, isolated, and detached from the rest of the world while you awaited either your death or an arranged marriage that would benefit your father's company, and potentially cushion his pockets a tad more.

As you emerged from the master suite of the penthouse, Simon heaved a resigned sigh, seeing you dolled up for the night ahead. Luxurious, private parties and public appearances to keep your name relevant in the tabloids and medias.

He leaned against the kitchen island, large arms crossed in his black button down, rich, honey-colored eyes fixated on you, and his signature black, surgical mask in place.

"Eat. You're not going out on an empty stomach." His deep, thick accented voice demanded. He nodded towards the plate on the counter, filled with chicken risotto with truffle sauce.

You scoffed in response to his authoritative tone before obeying anyways and climbing onto the bar stool, realizing it's probably best not to piss off your body guard.

"Where's it from?" You asked in a bland tone.

"Your kitchen." he answered gruffly as he poured an electrolyte packet into a bottle of water and set it beside your plate.

"Didn't know they taught ya to cook up truffle sauce in the military," you teased in that snarky tone he felt deep hatred for. Your metaphorical mask was going up early tonight.

"It's so cute how hard you work to save me from myself every weekend, big guy. Doesn't it get tiring?" You goaded before working at the small, yet filling dish before you.

Simon ignored your attempts to rile him up, knowing good and well you were fishing for a reason to indulge in your vices tonight. If you went out in a bad mood, it was all the more reason for you to fill your nose with booger sugar, and what better way to elevate yourself than starting it in a piss-poor mood, so your high will be that much better?

"Eat." Is all he replied with, leaving no room for questions or arguments.

As the night progressed, Simon kept a watchful eye on you, taking in your every move, expression, and breath while diligently scanning your surroundings to ensure your safety.

He watched as you finished another glass of champagne that was easily worth three months rent for his studio loft downtown.

You were pleasantly buzzed as you floated about the mansion, like you owned it, being the perfect little socialite you learned to be. Simon's dark, brooding presence loomed behind you, keeping you within at least three arm's lengths at all times.

"Going to the loo," you informed Simon as you spun on the toe of your red bottoms, heels clicking against the marble floor as you sashayed in the direction of the restroom.

You didn't even have to cast a glance over your shoulder to know Simon was already following behind you, keeping his eyes dutifully trained on you and your immediate surroundings.

Once outside the bathroom, Simon knocked on the door before entering and doing a sweep of the room before allowing you to enter.

You rolled your eyes at his precautious measures as he shut the door behind you. After clicking the lock in place, you promptly relieved yourself before standing at the vanity to wash your hands, reapply your red lipstick, then pull a little pick-me-up from your clutch.

Using the compact mirror, you pulled a tampon case from your clutch, producing a small baggie of white powder from within it, and emptied the contents of the baggie onto the mirrored surface as it sat on the vanity. You shook the small tampon case to receive a small straw, then used one of your many credit cards to neatly align the powder in a straight line.

Holding a finger to your left nostril, you plugged it and inserted the end of the straw into the right nostril, hovering over the powder as you inhaled with a strong pull from your nose and lungs.

The powder irritates your nose momentarily, causing it to scrunch and sniffle as the tingles pulse through your nasal passage. Bitterness coated your taste buds as the powder dripped down the back of your throat, earning a cringe from you as you shook your head, coughing slightly to aid the phlegm in easing down your esophagus.

You promptly cleaned up and did a final once over in the mirror, adamant not to stare too long and avoid your flaws. Clammy palms idly smooth over the material of your dress, trying to ensure you look your best, and avoid the nagging feeling at the back of your mind. Your darker-self trying to rear her ugly head and steal your fleeting moments of joy, and stir up the insufferable concoction of anxiety.

Finally, you emerged from the bathroom to be greeted with the sight of Simon stood with his back to the door, his large palm clasped firmly over his wrist.

He wasn't stupid. He knew exactly what you were doing in the bathroom. Had it only been a quick stop, it would've been three minutes tops. But when you did your pick-me-ups, it took seven minutes.

He shouldn't know that, yet considering you're a relatively well-known public figure, he has to time every second you're not in his line of sight.

Simon stepped to the side, allowing you to exit the bathroom. His dark eyes gave a disapproving look as he surveyed your appearance.

"You've got a bit of sugar on your dress." He informed you, glancing down at the skirt of your black cocktail dress.

Your eyes hurriedly followed his, searching for the spot and swiping your hand over the material, earning an amused glint to flash in his normal unreadable eyes.

You groaned in annoyance once it became apparent he was messing with you, your hand quickly came up to slap his arm in defiance.

"Arse," you muttered under your breath. Simon's stoic demeanor momentarily gave way to show off a glimpse of underlying smugness.

Simon couldn't deny that you were a good looking woman, and he always found it hard to tear his gaze away from you, especially when you were a magnet for people. You had the natural ability to draw people in, even with your resting-bitch-face. Somehow, someway, everyone gravitated toward you.

It was very much the opposite of himself, all jagged edges, harsh lines with the repellent of a rabid Rottweiler. He found it fascinating on a personal level, but on a professional level, he loathed it.

He hated how people thought they could touch you, or be within three feet of you, or even the way they looked at you.

All he saw was greed, manipulation, and control. He was certain that you saw it too; he could see the faint flicker of disgust in your eyes when someone tried to cozy up to you for their own gain.

A part of Simon's heart ached to see your life full of so many people, yet none of them truly gave a shit about you. But he also knew you did it strategically, much like he had done for most of his life. Although, Simon's was done more coldly, you had a certain finesse about it. You held a sense of attainability, allowing people in just enough to keep control of, but never in deep enough for them to control you.

Behind the rich, spoiled brat, Simon marveled at the true strength and cunning you showed within this materialistic world. He could see the fox within you, calculating and sly as she was, planning her escape.

But the escape plan is what scared him. He heard every conversation you had with yourself, when you thought no one was listening.

You longed for a life without a name. Where you could fly under the radar, only keeping close to you those who truly cared. And as much as he tried to remain detached. He was concerned that one day, you'd find a remedy for that desire.. and take flight for the heavens.

Simon watched vigilantly over you as you remained perched on the outdoor couch with your group of girlfriends. His eyes never left you as your friend slipped a pill between your soft, red lips and did the tactless act of spitting her drink in your mouth to aid you in ingesting the pill.

Fuckin' hell, love. You need better friends.

He sighed inwardly, but heaved a quiet breath as he kept watch, wanting to shake his head in disappointment. But he knew you could feel his disapproving gaze prickling at your muted senses.

Your head dipped back in pleasure as your friend kissed down your neck, across your collarbones and back up to your lips. Half-lidded eyes remained trained on Simon as he stood within your sight, your eyes appreciatively raked over his form, taking in the way his muscles strained against the black fabric of his black button-down, and the way his slacks fit his tree-trunk legs perfectly.

He was a delicious sight and you were feeling ravenous, silently lusting over the man assigned to guard your life. The only man who gave a single shit about you.

Simon internally groaned, his hand clenching into fists behind his back as he watched the scene unfold before him. If he wasn't on duty right now, he'd be fucking you within an inch of your life, and make you pray to a merciless God. Himself.

You pulled yourself up from the couch on slightly unsteady legs, and sauntered over to him, only stopping in front of him once your hands were on his chest.

Simon gazed into your dilated pupils, already noticing the effects of your meeting with your little friend, Molly.

"Wanna go home," you demanded, pouting up at him.

"So soon? You looked like you were having a bit of fun." He replied in a neutral tone, keeping his aloof and disinterested persona in place.

"It's boring here," you whined, "wanna have fun. At home. With you."

"Mm, you wound me, bird. Here I thought you knew not to associate me in the same sentence as fun." He scoffed lightly, trying to keep the inflection of amusement from his tone.

He reached a large, callused hand to rest on the small of your back, acting as a stabilizer for your current state. Tingles ran up your spine as every nerve-ending desperately sought out the rest of his warm touch, igniting hot flames of desire along your spine, and pulsing directly to your rapidly slickening cunt from your heightened state.

Simon watched you closely once you were back in the safety of your home. He gauged you as you stripped off your dress carelessly, leaving it discarded on the floor, much like you had done with your heels the moment you were off the lift earlier.

He sighed as he watched you prance around the room topless, going about your business in your flimsy g-string.

"It's too bloody hot in this damn house," you whined as you adjusted the thermostat.

Your body swayed on unsteady legs, your skin glistened with intense perspiration. A wave of dizziness struck you, forcing you to lean against the wall momentarily while your heart rate soared, soft, frantic breaths escaped your lips while your vision blurred in a not so fun way.

Simon's eyes narrowed with concern before he immediately recognized your symptoms, having realized what would force this reaction out of you.

"How many lines did you do tonight?" Simon asked in a firm tone, scooping you up in his arms effortlessly, then rushed you into the bathroom.

He helped you kneel before the toilet, gathering your hair in one hand so you wouldn't have to focus on much.

"T-three," you panted out, feeling waves of nausea swell and your stomach to roil.

You retched into the toilet, firmly grasping the edges in a white-knuckle grip.

"And you only took one pill. Molly, right?" he asked with concern, gently rubbing his large palm at the center of your shoulder blades.

"Yeah," you croaked weakly before lowering your head again.

Simon grunted in frustration, yet remained vigilantly at your side, helping you through your sickness.

After a while, the vomiting finally ceased as he gently cleaned you up and propped your back against the bathtub. He quickly grabbed a washcloth and a disposable cup for mouth wash before handing it to you.

"Swish and spit in the cup, bird," he instructed while pressing the cold washcloth to your forehead, then moved it to the nape of your neck, trying to quickly cool your body down from the sudden onslaught of heat exhaustion.

You did as Simon instructed before handing it to him to dispose of. Your eyelids were hardly able to stay open, your body felt weak as if each limb was weighed down by imaginary anchors, and your skin felt like it was on fire.

Simon returned with a thermometer in hand, taking your temperature.

102 degrees.

"Fuckin' hell, bird." he murmured gruffly.

With quick efficiency, Simon collected you in his arms again, carrying you out to the oversized sectional in the living room.

You were already drifting in and out of consciousness, finding new items surrounding you each time you opened your eyes.

Simon worriedly administered an IV, a bin was placed beside the couch, cool washcloths littered across your body.

"What's all this?" you slurred nearly unintelligibly.

"Hyperthermia. Just rest. Let me take care of you," he answered in a softer tone than ever before, and had your body not been fighting for it's life, you might have caught the worry in his eyes and concern and care in his deep voice.

For several hours, Simon remained by your side, using a dropper to dispense electrolytes on your tongue, checking your temperature every hour, and gently running his fingers through your hair while you slept on the couch.

"M' gonna get you fixed up, bird... don't wanna see you like this anymore," he whispered in devotion, and pressed a tender kiss on your forehead.

| Next |

[galacticnikki]

A Baby Witch's First Grimoire

Grimoire Entry 19 - Crystals For Promoting Confidence

⚠️Obligatory Disclaimer⚠️

Crystals are not a substitute for modern medicine.

A-L:

Aegirine

Alexandrite

Apache Tears

Aragonite

Auralite-23

Axinite

Azurite

Black Jade

Bloodstone

Blue Lace Agate

Blue Scheelite

Bolivianite

Brazilianite

Brucite

Carnelian

Cherry Tanzurine

Chiastolite

Chinese Writing Stone

Chocolate Calcite

Chrysanthemum Stone

Collawood

Colombianite

Crazy Lace Agate

Dalmatian Jasper

Dioptase

Dragon Stone

Dravite

Eclogite

Epididymite

Erythrite

Fairy Stone

Flint

Fulgurite

Garden Quartz

Golden Healer Quartz

Goshenite

Grandidierite

Green Garnet

Green Kyanite

Green Onyx

Green Tiger Eye

Grenatite

Healer's Gold

Heliodor

Hiddenite

Himalayan Quartz

Honey Calcite

Howlite

Hypersthene

Impactite

Imperial Topaz

Isua

Japan Law Twin

Larvikite

Lemon Calcite

Leucitite

Limonite

M-Z:

Magnetite

Malachite

Maligano Jasper

Mango Quartz

Miriam Stone

Mookaite

Mottramite

Nellite

Neptunite

Noble Shungite

Nundoorite

Ocean Jasper

Onyx

Orange Aventurine

Orange Calcite

Orange Kyanite

Orange Selenite

Orca Agate

Orpiment

Orthoclase

Peanut Obsidian

Pietersite

Pink Calcite

Pink Halite

Pinolith

Polychrome Jasper

Prasiolite

Purple Opal

Pyrite

Pyromorphite

Pyrophyllite

Realgar

Red Jasper

Red Quartz

Red Tiger Eye

Rhodonite

Rhyolite

Ruby Fuchsite

Ruby in Kyanite

Ruby Zoisite

Rutile

Schalenblende

Shaman Stone

Sonora Sunrise

Sphalerite

Spinel

Staurolite

Strawberry Quartz

Stromatolite

Sulfur Quartz

Tektite

Tiger Iron

Titanium Quartz

Tourmalinated Quartz

Truffle Chalcedony

Tsavorite Garnet

Uvite

Variscite

Vesuvianite

Wulfenite

Yellow Opal

Zebra Calcite

Feel free to check out my master post for more information!

[tastesoftamriel]

My grandmother once told me “a way to a man’s heart is through his stomach,” which to be fair considering her may have been sword technique advice. However, I was curious if you’ve ever done food for seduction. If you wanted to get someone into your bed, what would you cook them before hand? And do Tamrielic cultures have a standard “come hither” meal?

If it's a romantic meal you're after, you've come to the right place. Whether it's Heart's Day or something a little more low key, you'll make anyone in Tamriel drool over you and your kitchen prowess with these meals!

Altmer

Just like with anything else in the Summerset Isles, subtlety is key when wooing. Relationships can take centuries to build between Altmer, so some choose to speed things up a little with what's known as a courtship basket: a not-so-simple picnic that's bound to wow. First, pick a stunning picnic location and an even more stunning wine. Load up that basket with all of Summerset's finest, from peach blossom indrik ricotta and Russafeld Heights grape honey to freshly baked spiced loaves and caviar. The rest is up to you!

Argonians

As many know, Argonians become life mates through bonding ceremonies, which are a quintessential part of Saxhleel culture. Bonding ceremonies usually entail a feast, usually with foods purported to put the happy couple in an amorous mood. One of the most famous aphrodisiac dishes is juicy Moss-Foot Croaker tree frog legs grilled in pandan leaves with wild bush honey, served atop gratinated witchetty grubs and Spotted Seatrout roe.

Bosmer

Love is a precious thing in Valenwood, and courtship often involves lots of food to test a potential spouse's skill in the kitchen and as a homemaker. The much-loved Husband's or Wife's Pie (known to some as Courtship Pie) tests those culinary skills from the fiddly all-butter thunderbug carapace crust to the twelve-hour meat and jagga filling. It's an exercise in patience and love to be sure!

Bretons

Nothing is quite as romantic as a night in Wayrest at a nondescript, candlelit gourmet restaurant with a two-year waitlist. If you can't wait that long, do the next best thing and host that dinner at home (the bedchamber is just around the corner, no?). Popular courtship dishes are generally rich and include foie gras with wild berry and shallot coulis, lamb saddle served medium rare with black truffle sauce, and salted caramel and brandy custard mille-feuille.

Dunmer

The famous Queen and lover Barenziah was particularly fond of a certain dish, which Dunmer in the many years after her influence still present to potential mates as a not-so-subtle hint at something more. The dish is none other than the notoriously finicky marshmerrow and comberry choux-fflé, which is exactly what it sounds like: a feat of culinary engineering that combines delicate marshmerrow and scuttle soufflé in a clamshell of sweet saltrice choux pastry. Guaranteed to make any Dark Elf fawn over you as if you were Narsis Dren.

Imperials

Imperials aren't exactly renowned for being the best with big feelings (it's all the Divine guilt), so showing someone you love them with food is the most common love language in the Province. Whether it's one of Salmo's sweetrolls, a hearty home cooked meal, or an unforgettable stay at one of the Imperial City's top hotels, there's no wrong way to go about Imperial courtship food. However, if you really want to impress, go for a dark chocolate and pomegranate torte, with a fudgy melting chocolate centre and topped with pomegranate treacle. Indulgent!

Khajiit

It's said that Khajiiti love is as fiery as their curries, but we all know better than to eat a hot curry on a date. So, what does one offer their partner when romantically inclined in Elsweyr? Try a silk-wrapped box of moon sugar bonbons from the closest gourmet sweet shop! A box of moon sugar candy is one of the most thoughtful gifts you can woo a Khajiit with, whether it's cardamom-milk cakes or hard boiled coconut and ginger sweets. Just be careful at the confectioners, because clashing flavours are a sign of bad taste...

Nords

If there's one race whose digestive system is directly linked to their nether regions, it's Nords. Just the mention of a romantic meal of buttery mudcrab legs with sourdough, twice-roasted elk basted in juniper spiced Honningbrew Mead, and snowberry pudding with a Nord Ale caramel drizzle is enough to make any Skyrim native do that thing where they brush their hair behind their ear while biting their lip at you.

Orcs

Historically speaking, there are two food items that are a must for wooing an Orc: echatere cheese, and proper Wrothgarian ale. Put the two together and you'll be planning a spring wedding. Echatere cheese and Orcish ale fondues, pies, sauces, and much more are the best way to use these star ingredients, but I prefer a bit of a twist: echatere cheesecake with a caramelised biscuit crust and berry-ale compote.

Redguards

Redguards are known for being passionate lovers, who write rambling love poetry and frantically check their birthsigns for relationship compatibility. With that in mind, you're going to have to work hard in the kitchen to gain a Redguard's love. If you're not sure where to start, skip the Middas special camel-stomach meatloaf at the inn and get right to the kitchen to make some rasmalai! This unique spiced dessert of sweet cottage cheese balls are served with crushed pistachios, and a cardamom, saffron, and rose-infused cream. The punchier and more balanced the spices, the more likely you are to pull that date.

[sleepis4theweak]

FOODIE SIBLINGS AND FRIENDS EXTENDED UNIVERSE MASTERPOST

Owners-

Milkshake: Me! and @mikebeanz

Waffles Pancake: Me

'Sandy' Sandwich : @kredena-dark

Slushie: @buny1

Peppermint: @pinkatint

Kiwi: @banana-pancake5

Mochi: @ilikestarfoxturtles

Pretzel: @ilikestarfoxturtles

Bluecrop Blueberry/Blue/Berry: @trashyandtiredsol

Bill/Bilberry Bun - @minophlia

Sundae - @cosmocafe

Salad/Lettuce- @diona-98

Toffee- @peoplepersonoaktree

Ichigo Miruku - @tinker-the-dragon

Kathy Cookie - @qeelovestea

Blackberry- @artcosmique

Chips- @critter-core

Muffin- @critter-core

Gram- @allyheart707

Mellow - @allyheart707

Cotton Candy- @ofthefrogs

Honey and Maple- @mochi-myles

Caramel Crumb- @delicatechildwitch

Cheddar- @corgiisaloser

Cowtail - @3mutantsinatrenchcoat

Raspberry- @riseleon

Cherry - @artistheworld

Orange Juice- @temva

Cupcake- @riseleon

Strawberry - @riseleon

Bean - @ilikestarfoxturtles

Star/Starfruit- @drillss

Onion- @diona-98

Apple Sweet - @mikebeanz

Candy - @kiyokotheweeb

Baykari/Black Forest cake- @smuggonifico-lmao

Okra - @banana-pancake5

Carrot Cake- @dr-slightly-dissapointed

Pocky- @corgiisaloser

Amyteia/Ruby- @minophlia

Truffle- @qeelovestea

Matcha - @diona-98 and @qeelovestea

Poptart- @doctor-feelings

Spicy Flan- @justletmereadmycomics

Caramel Cheesecake- @tinker-the-dragon

Leatrice Lemon- @buny1

Broccoli- @diona-98

Red Bean- @diona-98 @qeelovestea

Citrus/Tangerine- @/mochi-myles

Mochaccino- @/mochi-myles

Passionfruit- @critter-core

GENERAL TAG FOR THE AU-

#tmnt foodie au

[blackdoghoney]

Black Truffle Honey, A Slightly Decadent Culinary Gem

What is Black Truffle Honey?

When it comes to culinary indulgence, few ingredients can match the mystique and allure of truffles. Their rich, earthy flavor and intoxicating aroma have made them a coveted delicacy for centuries. But what happens when you take these exquisite fungi and blend them with delicious raw honey?

Health Benefits of Black Truffle Infused Honey

Beyond its delightful flavors, black truffle honey offers several health advantages:

Antioxidant Properties: Honey, in its natural state, is rich in antioxidants, which help protect the body from oxidative stress. The truffles add to these benefits with their own array of antioxidants.

Immune Support: Truffles contain vitamins, minerals, and other compounds that can enhance the immune system, potentially helping the body fight off illness.

Anti-Inflammatory Effects: Some research suggests that truffles may possess anti-inflammatory properties, which can be beneficial for overall health.

Read More: https://blackdoghoney.com.au/black-truffle-honey/

[olive-pit123]

𓇢𓆸

black pepper parmesan grits topped with honey rosemary garlic confit + sage butter roasted maitakes drizzled with hot truffle olive oil, happy dinner to me

[paldean-sandwich-rater]

A sandwich.

It contains ice cream, whipped cream, sponge cake, meat balls, broccoli, pineapple, strawberries, tomatoes, lettuce, rice, noodles, mac and cheese, bacon, beef jerky, dried fish, seaweed, one of every Pokemon berry, jam, olive oil, lotus, dragon fruit, ravioli, ramen, tempura, teriyaki chicken, macaroons, escargots, mint, pepper, salt, sugar, croquettes, pickles, apples, avocados, sausages, bell peppers, grapes, pizza, a donut, cheese, more cheese, even more cheese, mushrooms, mustard, olives, a fried egg, a scrambled egg, blueberries, a poached egg, chawanmushi, a red bean bun, mochi, bbq sauce, chicken nuggets, french fries, takoyaki, pancakes, mackerel, salmon, coffee beans, spinach, a tiny bit of corn cream soup, ramensanga, fettucine alfredo, a plain bagel, pretzels, chocolate chip cookies, sweet potato, yam, potato, scallions, scallops, squid, crab stick, fish balls, fish cakes, oyster sauce, silken tofu, barley, cereal, paprika, oysters, red snapper, sea bass, plums, bean sprouts, garlic, string cheese, camembert, swiss cheese, mozzarella, parmesan cheese, yogurt, brinjal, a macdonald’s happy meal (without the toy and the packaging of course), truffles, caviar, tapioca balls, fried chicken, century eggs, cake sprinkles, dark chocolate, milk chocolate, white chocolate, milk tea (just a tinge), coffee (also a tinge), pudding, pumpkin, honey, mutton, mashed potatoes, bananas, icelandic fermented shark that they bury in the ground for months, raisins, dried mangoes, a drop of water, jelly, nata de coco, prunes, roasted pork, rosemary, bee pollen, peas, deer meat, rabbit meat, fish maw, ham, turkey, m&ms, chub, fufu, watermelon, winter melon, rock melon, coffee jelly, cacao, carrots, blueberries, black tea, dumplings, carrot cake, beetroot, purple cabbage, corn, celery, edamame, red beans, black beans, green beans, kidney beans, cashews, peanuts, pecans, sunflower seeds, walnuts, chickpeas, almonds, daikon, MSG, tamales, anchovies, tabbouleh, lions mane mushroom, chicken of the woods, kelp, octopus, durian, kimchi, crème fraîche, popcorn, cotton candy, everything bagel seasoning, capers, pears, marinara sauce, bittercress, butter cream, every single iteration of galarian curry, sushi, sashimi, kale and a very very specific ramen bowl (without the actual bowl) from a very particular shop located in Iwatodai.

And the top and bottom buns are somehow made from 50 different kinds of bread in a checker box pattern.

It comes with a picture.

Ingredients: I am not typing all of that out again. What the fuck.

Smell: You’ve taken an entire food court’s worth of food and made it into a sandwich. This isn’t even possible. Why am I considering this. 3/5

Taste: How do you eat this. 2/5

Texture: You get like 5 different foods every bite. This is not balanced. There is no harmony. This sandwich is the embodiment of disorder and chaos. 1/5

Presentation: The fact that this even looks sandwich adjacent is a fucking miracle. You don’t get full points though. Because I don’t like you. 3/5

Would Chunk Eat It?: He would eat maybe 1/50th of it. So no. 1/5

Final Score: 2/5

Critic’s Notes: Why would you waste this much food. Just host a party. Donate it. Something fucking anything I am begging at this point.

[storiesbyjes2g]

Your OC just won a free pizza with toppings of their choice! What will toppings will they have? 🍕

(answer for as many OCs as you like)

Oooh! Let me think about this...

Nick and Luca like everything and will take a supreme. (typically that is all the meats, mushrooms, onions, bell peppers, and olives)

Kam will take a meat lovers. Add Anissa to that order too lol.

Nadia gives the pizza a heavy side eye and asks for a salad. When she is told of the rules, she sighs and says, "Fine. Give me a white pizza with bacon, arugula, apple slices, caramelized onions, walnuts, and goat cheese. Drizzle some honey on top while you're at it."

Jorden will have a margherita. (mozzarella, basil, tomato)

Tori, our other vegetarian wants a little more. Hers will have an olive oil and garlic base, roasted mushrooms, caramelized onions, mozzarella, white cheddar, chives, shaved parmesan, garlic aioli swirl and a spritz of black truffle oil.

I think Mel (my spice hound lol) would be a fan of this pizza at a local chain here called Maui Wowie. It has a pesto base, mozzarella, honey ham, pineapple, jerk chicken, banana peppers, and bacon.

Noemi is a baysic bae and would just want cheese lol.

Sophia is lactose intolerant and is crying in the club over this pizza party.

Alessia will take a slice or two from Luca's pie.

I could see Chi Chi as a margherita girl. (mozz, basil, tomato)

Yasmine...just pepperoni.

[tokensofmyconfections]

Hi, my name is Elva and I'm helping my Grandpa run his bakery and sweetshop while my parents work on fixing up the house more.

We are just starting out, so hopefully our shop earns a good reputation for our good food made with the recipes my Grandma gathered in her youth when she went on her Pokémon journey!

Tokens of my Confections menu

Seasonal baked goods 

Herb Loaf

Zucchini Nabab Bread

Orange Blossom Combee Scones

Nomel Streusel Scones

Strawberry Ricotta Muffins

Strawberry Cucumber Bread

Pecha Cobbler Cookies

Mini Chocolate Chip Sandwich Cookies

Nomel Blukberry Whoopie Pies

Nomel Meltaways

S'mookies

Ginger S'mores

Trail Mix Cookie Cups

Rawstberry Ribbons

Sparkle Sweetheart Cookies

Berry-Cream Cookie Snaps

Beach Butter Cookies

Sand Dollar Cookies

Salted Butterscotch & Pecan No-Bakes

Soups (offered during the cold spells during summer)

Mulligatawny Soup

Circhester Hot Pot

Mincemeat

Hairst Bree

Cock-a-Leekie

Wooloo Heid Broth

Drinks

Pecha fizz

Strawberry-ade

Summer Party Punch

Apple Cider (spiced or muled) {apples picked by my grandma with her neighbor’s Appletun, Fritters, help}

Blukberry and Mint Iced Tea

Arnold Palmer Lemonade/Iced Tea

Chai

Apple Cinnamon tea

Herbal tea blend: Summertime Lemonade (lemons and nomel berries as main ingredients)

Herbal tea blend: Floral Sunshine (Lavender, honey, nomel berries, lemons)

Black Cheri Chocolate

Candy

Peanut Butter Fudge Cups

Chocolate Bonbons

Chocolate Fudge

Peppermint Patties

Chocolate-Covered Cheri Berries

Potato Candy (recipe from 1933)

Buckeyes

Chocolate Angel Food Candy

Crispy Peanut Butter Balls

Chocolate Caramels

Swablu Divinity

Angel Food Christmas Candy

Nanab Cream Chocolate Truffles

Pumpkin Fudge

Caramel Truffles

Creamy Caramels

Dark Chocolate Rawstberry Fudge

Orange Gumdrops

Peanut Butter Logs

Lady Fingers

Apple Cider Cookies

Three-Chip Galarian Toffee

Chocolate-Dipped Candy Canes

Curry-Kissed Coconut Fudge

Butter Crunch Candy

[thesunsethour]

welcome back to part 3 of eve procrastinating her final exams by ranking her favourite songs by her favourite artists. today it is The Beatles' turn

(as always i must stress this is my opinion only. but i am also very nosey, so please tell me *your* opinions too)

(i'm ignoring songs in different languages, naked versions, and also any cover songs, so focusing exclusively on anything penned by lennon-mccartney or harrison or starr)

(this took me a week and a half. for context my killers' list took two days and hozier took four hours)

without further ado:

189. Wild Honey Pie (spoiler alert: i'm not a white album fanatic)

188.       Dig It (vibey but odd little song)

187.       Maggie Mae (didn't know for years this was a liverpool folk song)

186.       Only A Northern Song (not weird enough to justify itself)

185.       Revolution 9 (it achieves john's goal. still hate it though)

184.       All Together Now (worse precursor to the frog chorus)

183.       It’s All Too Much (i would like to apologise to yellow submarine)

182.       Flying (criminal that this is so far down actually. i only have myself to blame)

181.       I’ll Get You (bit samey)

180.       Savoy Truffle (i wrote down 'harrison's own muzak')

179.       Everybody’s Got Something to Hide Except for Me and My Monkey (wtf john)

178.       Thank You Girl  (harmonica has been utilised better)

177.       Every Little Thing (pretty okay)

176.       You Like Me Too Much (george still in songwriting training)

175.       I Want To Tell You (the beginning of george's 'i don't know' refrain in his songs. keep an ear out)

174.       The Inner Light (SO very george)

173.       Her Majesty (i'm irish so this had to be this low)

172.       You Can’t Do That (great john vocals here tbh)

171.       Honey Pie (you can so clearly hear the music hall inspiration. very paul)

170.       When I Get Home (bit samey but catchy enough)

169.       There’s a Place (better harmonica)

168.       I Need You (lovely harmonies)

167.       Not a Second Time (i always forget this song exists sorry to john lennon)

166.       It’s Only Love (i always think this ones on rubber soul)

165.       I’ll Cry Instead (conversely this is very beatles for sale coded i think!)

164.       Little Child (i am a sucker for the harmonica it has to be said)

163.       You Know My Name (Look Up The Number) (really campy ad-libs. a fan)

162.       I’m a Loser (john's voice is so deep in this one??)

161.       I Don’t Want to Spoil the Party (little foot tapper of a song)

160.       Piggies (george had been reading orwell! good for him)

159.       Don’t Pass Me By (ringo! hello!)

158.       I’ll Be Back (solid enough)

157.       Doctor Robert (one of the earliest examples of 'we will sing a song about a little random man')

156.       If I Needed Someone (solid george effort)

155.       Why Don’t We Do It In The Road (apparently about two monkeys fucking. okay paul)

154.       Baby’s in Black  (clever little lyrics)

153.       It Won’t Be Long (adore the coming home line)

152.       All I’ve Got to Do (sweet enough little thing)

151.       Hold Me Tight (classic paul asking for love. a staple of the genre)

150.       What Goes On (hiiiii Ringo!)

149.       Yer Blues (my notes say 'proto-morrissey-esque, but worse)

148.       Good Night (reminds me of a musical song. also originally thought this was a paul song)

147.       She’s a Woman (really dynamic paul vocals)

146.       What You’re Doing (solid paul job)

145.       No Reply (i cannot think of this song without hearing the bloopers of YOUR FACE)

144.       Happiness Is A Warm Gun (i may get killed for having this so low. reminder that this is only my opinion)

143.       Don’t Bother Me (i *think* this is the first album song that george ever wrote!)

142.       P.S. I Love You (he loves his epistolary songs does Paul)

141.       I’m Just Happy to Dance With You (another solid foot tapper)

140.       Any Time At All (love the piano in this)

139.       I’m So Tired (same)

138.       Birthday (i hate the beginning of this song with a visceral passion. rest is grand)

137.       The Night Before (very '50s)

136.       Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band (Reprise) (the only bad thing about this song is that it means the album is over)

135.       Another Girl (bitchy little paul song)

134.       Tell Me What You See (song gets better as it goes on i think)

133.       The Continuing Story of Bungalow Bill (hello yoko)

132.       Long, Long, Long (reminds me of my sweet lord)

131.       Ask Me Why (real jazzy like)

130.       Rocky Raccoon (i'm not mad on this song but the middle is so catchy it reels me in)

129.       Old Brown Shoe (ringo reference check!)

128.       Revolution 1 (not as good as revolution the single)

127.       Cry Baby Cry (love paul's little jaunty section)

126.       Yes It Is (sexy)

125.       Dig A Pony ("everything has got to be just like you want it toohoohoohoohoohooo"

124.       The Word (reminds me of grease)

123.       Hey Bulldog (some bits of music here remind me of 'Across the Universe')

122.       I’m Looking Through You (GREAT guitar)

121.       Sexy Sadie (can't remember which journalist said that AM's 4 out of 5 has this vibe and YEAH)

120.       I Me Mine (i will always adore the "flowing more freely than wine" lyric. thank you george"

119.       Things We Said Today (paul's so good in this one)

118.       Tell Me Why (catchy bop)

117.       Run For Your Life ("that's the end" SO good)

116.       Good Day Sunshine (nicely jaunty)

115.       Rain (love the instrumentation in this one)

114.       I Will (quintessential mccartney this)

113.       Love You To (making this list and hearing george's improvement as a songwriter was amazing actually)

112.       Octopus’s Garden (bless ringo)

111.       I Feel Fine (SO catchy)

110.       With A Little Help From My Friends (ringo's very best)

109.       Martha My Dear (i'm scared of dogs but i'll let this one go)

108.       Drive My Car (the beeps beeps always annoyed me as a kid)

107.       For You Blue (it is what it says - sweet and lovely)

106.       Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band (love the laughter in it)

105.       Good Morning Good Morning (the guitar here is simply too cool for this song. elevates it greatly)

104.       You’re Going To Lose That Girl (beach boys vibes?)

103.       She Said She Said (john and george buddies and pals)

102.       Wait (john and paul's voices go SO well together do you ever get emotional)

101.       Think For Yourself (ANOTHER great foot tapper)

100.       I’m Down (well *somebody* thinks they're elvis)

99.         Misery (just. great structurally)

98.         I Should Have Known Better ("this could only happen to me" oh, john)

97.         Can’t Buy Me Love (one of the more Lennonesque mccartney songs)

96.         One After 909 (how did paul not know what this was about for over a decade)

95.         I’ve Just Seen a Face (absolutely gorgeous guitar)

94.         This Boy (thaaaasss boyyyy)

93.         You Won’t See Me (fab little chorus)

92.         Maxwell’s Silver Hammer (BANG BANG MAXWELL'S SILVER HAMMER CAME DOWN UPON HER HEAD 🔨 🔨🔨)

91.         Dear Prudence ("the clouds will be a daisy chain" is a line i've always adored)

90.         Yellow Submarine (i remember being 6 and our teacher playing this for us on her guitar)

89.         Mean Mr Mustard (love when john does a bit of narrative songwriting)

88.         Revolution (superior revolution version)

87.         Now and Then (cried on the tram on the way to college listening to this when it came out. as you were)

86.         Polythene Pam (love when their accent peaks through)

85.         Baby, You’re A Rich Man (a true lennon-mccartney collab with john not finishing something and paul adding his two cents, or rather, ten or twenty cents)

84.         Hello, Goodbye (i love the end of this song so so much)

83.         Mother Nature’s Son (soft and sweet, poignant but not sappy, one of the most underrated beatles songs of all time)

82.         Free As A Bird (cried listening to this too)

81.         Glass Onion (intertextual metanarrative: the song)

80.         Taxman (baby's first political song <3)

79.         I Wanna Be Your Man (hiiiiii again ringo)

78.         From Me To You (harmonica time again baby!)

77.         Being For The Benefit of Mr Kite! (i think of this as a spooky halloween waltz)

76.         Within You Without You (quintessential george)

75.         I’m Only Sleeping (underrated on revolver methinks)

74.         Your Mother Should Know (these songs WERE a hit before my mother was born)

73.         All My Loving (pure vintage mccartney)

72.         Do You want to Know a Secret (baby george and his fab vocals)

71.         Here Comes The Sun (okay nobody kill me. stop looking at me like that. its been winter for seventeen months george i can't fucking see the sun)

70.         Julia (so beautiful)

69.         Love Me Do (how were they pop song professionals already?)

68.         I Saw Her Standing There (paul loves a good scream in the middle of a song)

67.         A Hard Day’s Night (most iconic beginning of any song ever)

66.         Magical Mystery Tour (he loves a bus does paul)

65.         And Your Bird Can Sing (john's vocals are GREAT here)

64.         Sun King (the superior sun song on abbey road)

63.         Please Please Me (just. iconic)

62.         Eight Days a Week (for how good it is i can't believe paul didn't play it live till like 2013 or smth)

61.         Real Love (i never knew this was a beatles song when i was a kid!)

60.         The End ("the love you take is equal to the love you make"... yeah...)

59.         Back in the USSR ("my-my-my-my-" very billy joel actually)

58.         Ticket to Ride (mouth-watering guitar)

57.         For No One (the wario of 'And Your Bird Can Sing' no i won't explain further)

56.         All You Need Is Love (the she loves you yeah yeah yeahs at the end...)

55.         Blue Jay Way (so wonderfully eerie to me)

54.         She Loves You (love the long and powerful held note on the last "glad")

53.         I Want To Hold Your Hand (they were children my god)

52.         Across the Universe (some of my favourite vocals)

51.         Carry That Weight (paul going through it, writing bangers)

50.         Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da (desmond and molly jones are close friends of mine at this stage)

49.         Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds (overrated a bit imo but still simply iconic)

48.         Penny Lane (sorry paul, john won the MMT round w strawberry fields but its okay this song still is a bop)

47.         Tomorrow Never Knows (fucking well done on this one lads. love it)

46.         Getting Better ("a little better all the time" v "it can't get no worse" is just. peak lennon mccartney)

45.         Got To Get You Into My Life (INSTANT banger)

44.         Michelle (i am a sucker for french as long as its not spoken by french people <3)

43.         Lovely Rita (i always loved this one because paul says "book" like how my nanny says it)

42.         Helter Skelter (loud, fast, and brilliant)

41.         Get Back (billy preston the man that you were)

40.         She Came In Through The Bathroom Window (best of the abbey road medley)

39.         I’ve Got a Feeling (i LOVE paul's deep voice)

38.         When I’m Sixty Four (i love paul's granny music. sue me)

37.         Come Together (john was so good at writing these nonsense songs)

36.         The Fool on The Hill (adore the "ohHhHhHhHhHhh")

35.         Fixing a Hole ("when i'm wrong, i'm right" is so very paul)

34.         Girl (BRILLIANT middle)

33.         Help! (vulnerable without overdoing it. just fantastic)

32.         Day Tripper (unashamedly sexy)

31.         And I Love Her (i love basically everything about this song. ranking got so hard from here)

30.         You’ve Got to Hide Your Love Away (john was ON IT for Help!)

29.         Nowhere Man (my brother thinks this will be the name of john's biopic)

28.         Lady Madonna (my favourite genre of paul songs are songs where he voyeuristically imagines someone's life. they always slap)

27.         Paperback Writer (i also write at shitty newspapers and want to be a paperback writer. this song feels too targeted)

26.         In My Life (so pretty. SO pretty)

25.         The Ballad of John and Yoko (imagine the vibes in the recording studio. john. yoko. paul. and yet they made this banger)

24.         Norwegian Wood (This Bird Has Flown) (my first ever favourite beatles song. has since been demoted but i still adore it)

23.         I am the Walrus (john at his weirdest best)

22.         She’s Leaving Home (i love when they write narratively)

21.         If I Fell (angelic harmonies)

20.         Don’t Let Me Down (fifth beatle billy preston supremacy)

19.         Because ("love is all, love is you"

18.         I Want You (She’s So Heavy) (vocals, instruments, lyrics, vibes, all incredible)

17.         Two Of Us (and if i said this was the best album opener?)

16.         Here, There, and Everywhere (paul says this is his favourite beatles song and you know what? he's so right for that)

15.         Oh! Darling (wario of the long and winding road. no i will not elaborate either)

14.         You Never Give Me Your Money ("OUT OF COLLEGE MONEY SPENT SEE NO FUTURE PAY NOT RENT" that is... me right this actual moment)

13.         Something (george said is anyone else gonna write one of the best love songs of all time? no okay i guess i will. and he did.)

12.         Golden Slumbers (cried to this as well. must stress i am not one to cry)

11.         Eleanor Rigby (the pinnacle of the MVS - McCartney Voyeuristic Storytelling)

10.         A Day in The Life (orchestra used to scare me when i was younger)

9.           While My Guitar Gently Weeps (george's best beatles song hands down)

8.           I’ll Follow the Sun (THE MOST UNDERRATED BEATLES SONG and i will die on this hill

7.           Yesterday (my father's favourite beatles song)

6.           The Long and Winding Road (my go to song to sing in the shower for some reason?)

5.           We Can Work It Out (pure lennon-mccartney baby!)

4.           Let It Be (the first and only song i ever learnt on ukulele and i was so proud of it)

3.           Strawberry Fields Forever (do i even have to say anything?)

2.           Blackbird (everything about this song is so beautifully perfect. paul mccartney is the best songwriter of all time okay. i've spent days upon days at this list and it's now making me emotional)

1.           Hey Jude (there's a reason it tops so many best songs of all time lists. a perfect 10. no notes. iconic. the first beatles song i played on repeat. would die slash kill to experience this live)