#Fuck You G.I. You Die!

[savage-kult-of-gorthaur]

"G.I., FUCK YOU! YOU DIE, G.I.!"

PIC INFO: Spotlight on a flocked green resin bust of former North Vietnamese President Ho Chi Minh (1890-1969) designed by the late, great Frank Kozik. The infamous tagline "FUCK YOU, G.I., YOU DIE!" is inscribed at the foot of its base.

EXTRA INFO: Ho Chi Minh Bust Flocked Green Limited Edition vinyl bust by Frank Kozik. SDCC 2007 exclusive. Edition of only 50 made.

ARTIST: Frank Kozik

PLATFORM: Ho Chi Minh bust

MANUFACTURER: Ultraviolence

Source: http://trampt.com/designer-toys/97082/ho-chi-minh-green-ho-chi-minh-bust-frank-kozik-ultraviolence & Richard Goodall Gallery.

[fanfic-writer-and-rambler]

Lord Death Man: Batman!

Batman: Damn it. I'm going to kill Spoiler and Damian!

Damian and Stephanie (on comms): Oh come on!

Lord Death Man: My nemesis! I will- Who's that?

Batman turns around to see Selina (dressed as Catwoman) behind him.

Catwoman: Hey.

Batman: My... Partner.

Catwoman: Aww thanks.

Lord Death Man: Um, huh, besides the point! Fight me!

Catwoman: Who is the skull guy and why... Why does he sound like that?

Batman: Lord Death Man.

Catwoman: That...that's not his real name is it?

Batman: He apparently goes by Larry.

Catwoman: Why does he sound like the Cobra Commander?

Batman: I don't- You watched G.I. Joe?

Catwoman: Every Saturday.

Batman: I love you more and more.

Catwoman: Aww, you're sweet. Can we leave this guy?

Larry: Hey, pay attention to me!

Batman to Larry: I've told you numerous times I don't want to be your whatever!

Larry: Well too bad this happening!

Spoiler (on the comm): Yeah, yeah how's it feel Batman!

Batman groans, covering his face.

Lord Death Man: Fight me, for I am Lord Death Man and I can not die!

Catwoman: You can't die?

LDM: Yes, I am deathless!

Catwoman: Nothing can permanently kill you?

LDM: Nope, if I drop, I will be revived for I am a master yoga!

Catwoman: Wait, wait, you can't die. You told the man who is trained in numerous fighting styles, learned how to kill a man in over a hundred?

Batman: A thousand.

Catwoman: A thousand ways and he has buried this repression for a very, very long time. You, a deathless man, want Batman, who will gladly let go of his no kill rule right now because you are deathless, to be your nemesis?

Lord Death Man (hesitant): Y- Yes, because I can handle it.

Catwoman looks at Batman with a smirk.

Batman shrugs.

Batman: If he is deathless.

Batman races to Lord Death Man and clocks him in the jaw as a start.

Catwoman (tapping into her new communication device Barbara gave her): Oracle it finally happened?

Barbara: Lord Death Man?

Catwoman: Yup.

Barbara (tapping into Jason's communication device): Jace, it happened with Larry!

Jason: Fucking finally!

[ashkgray]

Colonel Flagg, boy do I have a lot to say about you. A man who's so committed to the military and hanging onto that G.I. image for dear life to the point of literal self-harm. A man whose idea of masculinity is claiming you've trained yourself not to smile. A man who, for all intents and purposes, has been consumed by a system that doesn't give a fuck about him.

The reason that I liken him to Frank Burns a lot is that he's just as much of a propaganda-driven man as the former. The main difference in them lies in the fact that while Frank fails at conventional masculinity and lacks the charisma to actually have a G.I. temperament, Flagg is masculine and charismatic. He's a hunk. Which, I would go so far as to argue makes him an even worse case of a man desperate for purpose. When the war's over, Frank's going to be back to his (mal)practice and to the misery of whatever awaits him in civilian life. It's the shittiest sorry-excuse-for-a-life but it's still a Non-Military Thing He Has. Fake and miserable as it is.

But Flagg? Flagg's CIA. He's part of the damn system. He's deep into it. He, in achieving what Frank couldn't, dug a deeper hole of self-repression and denial for himself. He's barely a person anymore. He talks like a cartoon character hopped up on steroids and squints his eyes like an action movie star trying too hard.

In The Abduction of Margaret Houlihan he shows up and does fucking nothing. Yet somehow maintains this illusion of self-importance. He's silly as damn fucking hell, calling himself the wind and jumping out the damn window only to break his leg. But he genuinely doesn't realize it. And, again, unlike Frank, his self-assurance stops him from even registering it when other people point it out. Hawkeye makes fun of him and he's prissy about it but he doesn't look or feel bullied. Without, at the very least, registering the repulsion others seem to have for you ( which though sometimes evades Frank, is actually intrinsic to his character. He knows they don't like him. ), then how are you meant to improve? How are you meant to escape that trap you've shoved yourself into?

And can we take a moment to talk about his self-harm? Even if subconscious, there must be some part of him that is desperate to escape the life he's paved for himself. A reflection of the horrors he, too, sees both during the war and as a result of CIA conduct. Hurting himself for the sake of the army, the CIA and America™ might be the only way to feel worthwhile and alive at the same time. Just getting hurt, in his eyes, is losing. Doing a "mission" without sustaining any injuries? Why, that's just not noteworthy enough for him to get any attention from big strong Uncle Sam. But getting hurt on a mission? Now that's impressive. Now that's his purpose. Now that's what he should live for and, if all else fails, die for. What wonderful mixture of narcissism AND self-hatred must you have in you, Samuel, to feel that way.

I know this post is all over the place but the point of it is to say that in spite of being a complete and total beefcake, Colonel Samuel Flagg might be M*A*S*H's most pathetic character. Or at least the one who's deepest in his own shit. Unlike Frank, whose development demands an internal trigger to work, Flagg's might just be in dire need of an external one first, because internally he's been programmed to crumble.

[sadquickchristmassnowman]

random community rankings (because if there’s one thing I love it’s a good List)

(disclaimer just because something is ranked last does not mean I think it’s horrible!!! (although sometimes it does.) it just means I like the ones above it more.)

christmas episodes

1. 2x11 abed’s uncontrollable christmas

2. 3x10 regional holiday music

3. 1x12 comparative religion

HUGE fucking gap

4. 4x10 intro to knots

halloween episodes

1. 2x06 epidemiology

2. 3x05 horror fiction in seven spooky steps

3. 1x07 introduction to statistics

4. 4x02 paranormal parentage

paintabll episodes

1. 2x23 a fistful of paintballs/2x24 for a few paintballs more

2. 6x11 modern espionage

3. 1x23 modern warfare

4. 4x13 advanced introduction to finality (this one barely counts as a paintbal ep but I’m including it)

birthday episodes

(this one was really really difficult I would die for all three of these)

1. 5x11 g.i. jeff

2. 2x10 mixology certification

3. 2x19 critical film studies

animated episodes

1. 2x11 abed’s uncontrollable christmas

2. 5x11 g.i. jeff

3. 3x20 digital estate planning

season premieres (is that what they’re called? whatever. you get it)

1. 3x01 biology 101

2. 1x01 pilot

3. 6x01 ladders

4. 5x01 repilot

5. 4x01 history 101

6. 2x01 anthropology 101

season finales

1. 6x13 emotional consequences of broadcast television

2. 3x22 introduction to finality

3. 2x24 for a few paintballs more

4. 4x13 advanced introduction to finality

5. 1x25 pascal’s triangle revisited

6. 5x13 basic sandwich

seasons

1. season 3

2. season 2

3. season 1

4. season 5

5. season 6

6. season 4

pls rb with your rankings (of any number of these categories or add new ones!!) I would like to start some Tumblr Discourse™

[pleasetakethis]

New favorite ep of the season acquired the moment it opened. Some shippy rambling in the live blogging ahead.

If you know me at all, you know right off the bat that I AM UNHINGED ABOUT THIS EPISODE.

NATPEGGY YASSSSSSSSSSSSSS

THE BACKSTORY INTRO!

"What are new friends for?"

THEM SHOWING OFF THEIR MOVES TO EACH OTHER !!!!!

Wasp, too??? Yasss, all the ladies!!!!!!!!!!

Peggy and Nat already working so well together in combat and the level of trust that already exists between them, I just--slkdjflasdjfklajflajlfkjas

Them sassing Loki !!!!!!

Intro credits: Elizabeth Olsen???? Wanda's here, too????? Super spoiler alert: I waited so long for her to show up 🤣

Me and the Watcher feel the same about Captain Peggy Carter <3

The role reversal when Peggy picks up Nat in that slick ass car while Nat's running... guhhhhhh.

I am here for all versions of evil Steve, including brainwashed.

SCRUFFY SKINNY STEVE!

CA: TWS parallels got me in my feels, too. Peggy/Nat is THE SHIP for me, but there's something about Peggy/Steve that hits just right the same way as Tony/Pepper, Steve/Tony, and Steve/Bucky.

The framing of these shots got me--Peggy in the background pissed because she wasn't told about the rumors of the Hydra Stomper, while Nat (listening) definitely knew about Steve:

AHHH, PEGGY'S FACE WHEN SHE REALIZED NAT KNEW:

AND DIDN'T TELL HER:

SDALKFJLAKJFLAJS

Natasha quipping "Didn't see the point in breaking your heart twice," fucked me up, oh.

DILF old man Bucky <3 Bucky getting to grow old!!!! WIBBLES.

Guess it's gonna take both of the loves of Steve's Rogers life to get through to him? lmaooo

Peggy is the perfect mirror of Captain America Steve. In goodness, selflessness, AND their particular brand of self-righteous selfishness. I love both of them for it, but especially Peggy <3

Bucky standing up and saying Steve would be stupid enough to do the same for him. 😭 Bucky trying to get through to Steve. 😭

"What can I say, Peg? I'm a sucker for a good love story." Damn, that hurts for a million different reasons. oh, Nat. <3

UMMMM the way Nat sits back and says, "You know, I always wondered how you got all those G.I. boys to follow a woman into war? Question answered." !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BRAIN EMPTY! ONLY PEGGYNAT! And Nat couldn't be more obvious if she tried, but she does it so well and Peggy is distracted.

Are you kidding me with the framing of this shot?

I feel like it's foreshadowing but IT SCREAMS pining. A lot of pining:

Barton introduced Peggy to dad rock <3 fuck yes

Widow bites interrupting the kiss, lol.

Peggy being a weak point for Nat, to the point Nat gets nabbed by widow bites, JFC.

Peggy will die for Steve, the same way Steve would have died for Bucky--ughhh I do not like but I understand.

"Mission accomplished." !!! Hot damn, that was slick, A++, AND Nat tells Peggy she doesn't want to fight about it. 😏

THERE WAS A MUSICAL!

BAMF Melina. Love to hate her when she's on the wrong side, parent/child issues me in a weird way these days and this ep got under my skin.

But also: guhhhhhh these Widows.

"This isn't us! I am done fighting, Steve. [drops shield] I have been fighting for so long: to end the war, to forget what I lost. I'm… I'm tired." oh, Peggy.

oh, Steve.

oh, Nat.

This ep got me in the feels, all of them.

Peggy going back for Nat AND them running out together <3

Ugh, Nat and her transparent, "Okay. Let's hit the road." Just: THEM.

...and oops, Peggy's gone.

But then! OOOO, this Fury! AND FINALLY, WANDA!!!!!

Overall: similar in ep 4 in that it was close to the emotional impact of Stephen's ep in the first season but still missed the mark (and tbh the Tony ep hit harder, but more because of Tony's characterization--Peggy is fairly consistent, Tony is not, so getting him so right (for me) was incredible). I adore this ep, I love Peggy, I love Nat, I enjoy this universe, and I hope we visit their universe again (if not, there's always fanfic, my beloved).

[tending-the-hearth]

transformers: rise of the beast + what i loved about it

this movie was absolutely PHENOMENAL and had me on the edge of my seat for the majority of it. it's the first time i've seen a transformers movie in the theater, and i'm obsessed. i've loved transformers for the longest time, so this movie just had absolutely everything.

so below i've put together a list of everything i loved, my favorite moments, little over-analysis bits, all of that good stuff!

spoilers below if you care!!

first off, i absolutely loved how they set up the Maximals, and gave them such a distinct look and storyline. it was a great way of introducing new characters, as well as setting up the main plot device of the key!

Noah's relationship with Kris made me so emotional, like he loves his little brother SO much, and Kris loves him just as much, like UGH SIBLING DYNAMICS

Elena my beloved beloved nerd

She's one of my favorite characters in the movie, and I love how they portrayed how much she loves research, and how much knowledge she has

Obsessed with Noah keeping track of Mirage's braincell within the first five minutes of their meeting

but also their meeting + beginning scene, absolutely no thoughts in either of their heads (affectionate)

Noah and Mirage's friendship being built from the very first car chase, and them communicating so well even before Noah knows what Mirage is!!!

"I work in a museum and you've broken in and now we're hunting for an ancient artifact together" is SUCH a quality trope and Noah and Elena are so valid

Just saying I don't think I've ever happy-stimmed so much during a movie then I did when I saw Optimus and Bee show up on screen

Optimus being so against trusting the humans vs. how protective and fond he is of them in the Bayverse movies was such a good choice, and i'm so happy they gave Optimus more of a character arc!!

THEY REFERENCED CHARLIE AND THE BUMBLEBEE MOVIE REALLY BRIEFLY AND BUMBLEBEE GOT ALL SAD AND WAS LIKE "I HAVE A FRIEND" BECAUSE HE LOVES CHARLIE SM

Kris being just as protective over Noah as Noah is over him!!!!

ARCEE <3333333

Optimus continually calling Bumblebee "Bee" healed my heart he loves him so much

Going off of that, Elena finally giving us an "Optimus is Bee's big brother" confirmation made me SO happy

also yeah... Bee... baby boy... I literally thought I was going to have a panic attack bc i was so upset over him dying

listen Transformers Prime traumatized me with Bee's death first, so I still have a hold over from that era

I love Wheeljack with my whole heart and was absolutely terrified he was going to die during the battle with the Terrorcons

the Maximals are so fucking cool, I love their designs, and Primal's entire character???? beloved????? fantastic??

AIRAZOR DYING OF THE SAME THING THAT KILLED IRONHIDE I'M GOING TO BITE SOMETHING HOW FUCKING DARE

Primal having to kill Airazor was devastating

Noah running to check on Elena after that fight, Noah and Elena my beloveds 😭😭

MIRAGE 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Absolutely heartbreaking

The "home team?" "home team." callback hurt my soul

also Noah being Sonic, Kris being Tails, and Mirage being Knuckles?

BUT THEN HE'S OKAY AND THE SUIT??? AND NOAH AND OPTIMUS FIGHTING ALONGSIDE EACH OTHER??? NOAH LEARNING TO WORK WITH A TEAM???? OPTIMUS LEARNING TO TRUST HUMANS????

Also Kris and Noah basically being like "new brother? new sibling?" as soon as they meet Mirage

Bee's entrance was absolutely fucking top tier, he's an icon, he is the moment

Also Scourge was absolutely terrifying, one of the BEST bad guys

Nightbird was also so so cool and also so so terrifying, the Terrorcons were insane

FUCKING G.I. JOE AT THE END??? I FULLY THOUGHT NOAH WAS OGING TO GET RECRUITED BY SECTOR SEVEN?? WHAT THE FUCK???

Also the post-credit scene with Mirage coming back was fantastic, he's such a little shit and i'm obsessed with him

overall i'm obsessed and this is one of my new favorite movies, i'm really happy the movies are getting an overhaul, and hopefully we'll see more within this section of the franchise!!

[liketheletter-l]

Do you have a favourite episode of community or any thoughts on the series? I saw you reblog a post earlier about it and there aren’t a lot of opportunities to talk about one of my favourite autism shows

OH MY GOD. OKAY

i can't even pretend i'm normal about community even a little bit, it's literally seared into my brain and is a permanent part of my personality. my sister @inalienable-wright and i are working on ranking all 110 episodes (she literally coded a program so that instead of having to work with every episode, it presents us with two at a time and we just pick which one's better, it's really fucking cool)

the question of a Favorite Episode is really complicated to me, because i could think of at least fifteen off the top of my head that make me about the same amount of Deliriously Happy so here are some, in no particular order:

2x21 Paradigms of Human Memory

3x19 Curriculum Unavailable

3x04 Remedial Chaos Theory (duh)

3x05 Horror Fiction in Seven Spooky Steps

2x14 Advanced Dungeons & Dragons

2x08 Cooperative Calligraphy

1x10 Comparative Religion

1x19 Beginner Pottery

2x06 Epidemiology

2x15 Early 21st Century Romanticism

3x01 Biology 101

2x01 Anthropology 101

3x07 Studies in Modern Movement

1x17 Physical Education

1x07 Introduction to Statistics

6x01 Ladders

rambling thoughts about the series as a whole under the cut:

As you can see i obviously like seasons 1-3 more, and honestly if i kept listing favorite episodes from those seasons it would go on and on, because s2 and s3 esp are just ALL-STAR seasons (with a few exceptions, obvs. 2x18 and 2x20 come to mind for instant skips)

that being said, i liked seasons 4-6 fine. s4 isn't necessarily the level of absolute dogshit everyone says, but it was indeed bland compared to the vivid colorful witty hijinks of s1-3. it's hard to pinpoint because you're mostly noticing the ABSENCE of something; most of the actual episodes aren't Bad, but they just don't compare to the seasons before.

season 5 has a lot of good material that i can't rewatch Or i will literally fucking die. G.I. Jeff is a fucking masterpiece imo, geothermal goes without saying, Advanced Advanced DnD & the meowmeowbeenz episode were both funny as fuck, the ass crack bandit ep was gold, and most of the other episodes are solid. it's just Sad. there's just an incredibly melancholy and depressing tinge to the entire season and it makes me fucking SAD

season 6 i found very fun because i love frankie and elroy, but most of the episodes are too goddamn tragic to even rewatch just because it just feels hollow. there are some very funny parts of the season! but overall, it felt like they were trying to cram in the usual amount of hijinks, when really they only had 13 episodes to give these characters a satisfying send-off, and it ends up just leaving jeff and britta in particular at a STARTLINGLY low point to close out the entire series. i watched 6x13 at about 4am the morning before an exam and i cried so hard i started dry heaving to be honest

the only way i can watch the first three seasons is by pretending everything after the s3 finale straight-up Doesn't exist. i believe that the showrunners did (mostly) the best they could with the string of production disaster after production disaster post-season 3, but the ending is simply So fucking tragic.

our beautiful codependent insane found family that we've spent 3 seasons watching become closer and care for each other and get into trouble together just slowly, painfully gets picked off one by one. it's not even a clean break it's an Agonizing decay. i have to try very hard not to let it sour the rest of the series for me.

This is why we write fanfiction though! (i do wish there was more content focused on the study group as a whole rather than just trobed, but such is life) you should definitely DEFINITELY check out my sister's writing here because her community fic is fantastic

overall i think this show is one of the best ever made & i literally cannot express in words Just how close it is to my soul. it is inside my heart. it is literally part of me (im normal)

PLEASE HIT ME UP TO TALK ABOUT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[lord-squiggletits]

20, 18, 9 🤺

choose violence ask game

9. Worst part of canon?

The true answer is "everything Simon Furman touched with regards to Arcee and female TFs", but of course that's one of the shittiest parts of canon so that's a boring and predictable answer.

Instead I'll give you a lightning round of things that I hated/strongly disliked with little elaboration:

The Functionist Universe

Drift. Literally just everything about him and to do with him.

Slide (literally who from exRID and OP who nonetheless had the most annoying fucking personality of any side character I've had the displeasure of meeting)

18. It's criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

IDW Optimus is my go-to answer on this one for reasons that I've expounded at length on my blog, but I'll go ahead and say something that the fandom has actually been sleeping on and it's Stardrive. You should read the Rom vs Transformers crossover guys, I swear to you that it's a crossover actually worth reading. Has a cute, tragic woobie of a main character (Stardrive), you don't need to know anything about Rom to understand the story, and despite being a crossover the story is mostly focused on the Cybertronians so it's still interesting even if you would rather die than read anything to do with G.I. Joe or whatever else.

20. Part of canon I found tedious and boring

Gonna be honest, almost everything Barber wrote was tedious and boring as fuck to read. I read phase 2/3 more or less in one go, and with every other writer I was like "whoa this is so exciting it's a real page turner I can't wait to see what happens next." But with his parts of the story, with very few exceptions, I was just like "Eh... this isn't that interesting but it's not so boring that I want to skip ahead. I guess I'll keep reading and wait to see if it gets better." It sucks because a lot of his ideas are conceptually interesting and make the worldbuilding so much richer, but the way he actually writes them into story form is boring as shit. I swear I enjoyed my beta reader's explanation of the lore Barber introduced more than I enjoyed reading the actual fucking story.

[canticleofcanticlesforleibowitz]

[Sonnet] You jerk you didn't call me up

-- by Bernadette Mayer

You jerk you didn't call me up

I haven't seen you in so long

You probably have a fucking tan

& besides that instead of making love tonight

You're drinking your parents to the airport

I'm through with you bourgeois boys

All you ever do is go back to ancestral comforts

Only money can get-- even Catallus was rich but

Nowadays you guys settle for a couch

By a soporific color cable t.v. set

Instead of any arc of love, no wonder

The G.I. Joe team blows it every other time

Wake up! It's the middle of the night

You can either make love or die at the hands of Cobra

Commander

--------------

To make love, turn to page 121

To die, turn to page 172

[biglisbonnews]

Jimmy Kimmel Won't Let The Oscars Slap Die It feels like it has been ages since the internet and the world were set ablaze over the now-infamous slap that took place at the 2022 Oscars. Luckily, 2023 Oscars host Jimmy Kimmel will not let anyone forget.To refresh everyone's memory, Chris Rock has made jokes about Will Smith's wife, Jada Pinkett Smith in the past. It all came to a head at the 2022 Oscars, where Smith was there for his nomination as the titular role in King Richard. Rock noticed Pinkett Smith's shaved head due to her alopecia and compared her to G.I. Jane. The most meme-able moment came next: Smith approached Rock and slapped him. When he retreated back to his seat, Smith yelled, "Keep my wife's name out your fucking mouth!" Smith later accepted the award for Best Actor.In the aftermath of the incident, Smith was banned from the ceremony and any other Academy event for the next decade. He published two apologies. Rock, meanwhile, recently starred in his latest Netflix comedy special where he cracks jokes about the incident.Related | 'Everything Everywhere All At Once' Sweeps the OscarsThe Academy refused to take any chances this year, mobilizing a crisis team that will spring into action both on the ground and online should another incident occur. The 2023 Oscars went off without a hitch, although this year's host Jimmy Kimmel made sure people didn't forget about the slap heard 'round the world. Kimmel opened the show saying, "We know this is a special night for you. We want you to have fun. We want you to feel safe. And most importantly, we want me to feel safe. So we have strict policies in place. If anyone in this theater commits an act of violence at any point during the show, you will be awarded the Oscar for Best Actor and permitted to give a 19-minute-long speech."He also poked fun at the lack of response from the awards team last year as Smith was not asked to leave the premises. "Seriously, The Academy has a crisis team in place. If anything unpredictable or violent happens during the ceremony. Just do what you did last year: nothing. Sit there and do absolutely nothing. Maybe even give the assailant a hug."Kimmel also shouts out the long list of people one would have to get through before they can hurt him, including Michelle Yeoh, Pedro Pascal, Michael B. Jordan and even his trusty longtime sidekick, Guillermo Rodriguez.The jokes didn't stop there. Throughout the night, Kimmel made other quips including, "Please put your hands together and then keep them to yourself," and "At this point in the show, it kind of makes you miss the slapping a little bit, right?" The show ended with one final jab at the infamous altercation when Kimmel updates a sign that reads "Number of Oscars Telecasts Without Incident" with "001."Let's hope we can finally let this incident die before Rock makes another special about it.Photo courtesy of Kevin Winter/Getty https://www.papermag.com/oscars-jimmy-kimmel-2659589039.html

[basgevers]

Revisiting Sandinista! - The Clash

I remember being so disappointed with this album when I first got it - not punk at all, but a strange mix of dub, funk, reggae, jazz and even a waltz, it was no Clash, or Give 'Em Enough Rope. I should have seen the warning signs, mind you: London Calling was a strange mix too, an obvious sign that The Clash were moving into a different direction. Not "Jazz Odyssey" different, but just, well, different.

I don't think I ever listened to the whole album in the first few weeks after I got it. Although this came out in 1980 I didn't buy it until the mid-80's when I was still in my "communism will save the day" phase, and the idea of an album named after left-wing Nicaraguan freedom fighters appealed to my solidly white middle-class political ideology. Remember, this is in the days before CD's and mp3's and Napster and Spotify, so I bought this on something called a 'cassette'. And a fucking double album to boot as well! Two cassettes worth, 24-tracks of punk goodness.

Or so I thought.

The Magnificent Seven starts us off. Now, I'm expecting White Riot here. Instead I get some kind of funk. Wind on (cassette, remember). Hitsville UK ... whit? Wind on. Junco Partner ... wind on ... Ivan Meets G.I. Joe ... at this point I am looking for the receipt. I skip side 2 altogether (it would take too long to wind to the end ..), try side 4 instead and last about as far as Midnight Log before pressing eject and putting the box-set in a drawer where i forget about it until 28th October 2019.

Listening to it now, 32(!) years later, Sandinista! is a classic. A flawed classic, but hey, even Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da doesn't make the White Album any less a masterpiece. You have to remember that when Sandinista! came out we had the likes of Johnny Logan, Kenny Rogers, Abba and Barbara Streisand topping the charts. I mean, the fucking St Winifred's School Choir where at  #1 in the weeks between Christmas and New Year’s. Punk had died, truly. For the survivors, it was adapt or die. And the Clash certainly adapted. On 1978's London Calling we already had hints of a different direction (The Guns of Brixton, Rudy Can't Fail, Wrong 'Em Boyo) but there were still some of the overdriven guitars and anguished vocals to be found on the previous two albums.

But on Sandinista! it was hard to remember that this was the same band that put out Career Opportunities only three years previously. Perhaps this is what made the Clash stand out from the rest. With the exception of The Jam, most of their contemporaries failed to evolve. Or, to paraphrase from Spinal Tap, their musical growth rate cannot even be charted. Sandinista! is an album of such dizzying variety from on track to another that would be hard to pull off for a band with lesser musical talents than Messrs. Strummer, Jones, Simonon and Headon. The silence between the tracks leaves little room to contemplate what comes next. Funk? Soul? Punk? Reggae? Who knows, but strap in - it'll be good.

Back in 1987, furiously winding through the tape to find just one song that I could actually like I stumbled across the track I am sharing - Up in Heaven (Not Only Here). Strangely enough for an album with so much variety, this is one of the more 'normal' offerings. Perhaps that's why it stuck out for me after all these years. It has a place on my "Songs To Hear Before You Die" Deezer playlist.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to spend some time with Sandinista! to see if there's any other hidden gems to add.

[kachuuyaa]

##ViDEO GAMES? — g.i

g.i headcanons, gn!reader, modern au.

1CHARACTERS; DILUC, CHILDE, KAEYA, VENTI, XIAO, XHONGLI, ALBEDO

2GENRE; CRACK, FLUFF

3INCLUDES; mentions of violence, u ARE LOUD, screaming, profanities, they watch u suffer really, implied suggestive themes

4AUTHOR'S NOTE; A PACKAGE DEAL TO MAKE UP FOR MY ABSENCE YESTERDAY screams Also this is quite short pardon i made this with no energy actually

5SYNOPSIS; fantasies exist solely due to the expectations of children. (or, alternatively, you play Resident Evil 8 in front of them.)

Screams and curses erupted from your mouth while playing this damned game. It wasn’t that you regret it, though, you just simply did not expect this. You couldn’t hold your suggestive comments directed to Dimitrescu and Heisenberg though, they were, to put it simply, hot. Their voices, too. And while your own voice was a beautiful song as it is, you just can’t get enough of them. So why were you cursing out Heisenberg when he decided to make you run for your life, literally? You practiced enough Temple Run for this, fortunately, but your screams and your broken yells of Heisenberg’s name would make the people think otherwise.

You were currently in Lady Dimitrescu’s castle, with nothing to do. You were currently looking for an objective, completely immersed at the game. You didn’t care though, you just wanted to finish this fucking game.

DILUC

GOD YOU ARE SO FUCKING LOUD.

Was what he kept on thinking about when he entered your shared home. He was greeted by an assortment of screams that was not remotely close to a greeting. Although, he was very worried, simply because you were screaming, “don’t fucking kill me! Fuck! I’ll kill you first!” And the like.

Being the gentle-- yet impulsive man he was, he rushed over to the living room, where he thought you were, and you swore you have never seen such a big switch in attitude from your boyfriend.

He scoffed, lips forming a smirk, while he observed your supposed enraged figure, screaming incoherent words, that he could only imagine what you were saying.

What he didn’t expect though, was to hear a gruesome and someone being stabbed, followed by a, “wait, fuck, you’re hot, do that again.” escaping from your lips.

His eyes widened in surprise and shock, whipping his head to your direction while you seemed unfazed from what you just said.

“Oh, hi, Diluc.” You say nonchalantly, nearly bursting into laughter when you flicked your eyes to the man, seemingly perplexed at your statement beforehand.

He brought himself to the seat beside you, and decided not to say anything, he thinks you needed to focus.

In the duration of the game, he might chuckle at your bold statements to the tall lady, while you joke around and send some suggestive comments to her. He never thought you could be so bold.

Although, when she stabbed you with her claws in game, you faked a moan, and his amused expression was quickly replaced that of disbelief.

When you stabbed her back though, you cheered. What the fuck.

The reactions the game elicited out of you both when you have seen the lady in her final form were hilarious, really.

You screamed a disbelieving “Hah?!” with other variations of “what the fuck,” and Diluc simply said, “You are going to die.”

You did die. Once, but you defeated her, ultimately.

Diluc did not understand what Duke had said, saying that you had your daughter in your hands for a split second, and when realization dawned on him, he was disgusted.

Overall, Resident Evil with Diluc is fun, yet expect him to be surprised with your bold comments. (he was silently hoping that you were able to be more bold with him since then.)

KAEYA

Holy shit-- fuck Kaeya, the game is more important than your touch starved boyfriend. (At least, for a while.)

He announced his arrival quite loudly, yet your eyes were still focused on the game before you, and when he didn’t get a response, he went into the living room, expecting you to be there.

There you were, first encountering the baby mutation in the Beneviento mansion.

And Lord, he swore he heard the most disgusted yet terrified scream you have ever let out. That, and some variation of, “What the fuck is that?! Archons-- What, what, what, what-- Holy shit, shut the fuck up.”

He sat on an unoccupied chair, on the opposite side of where you were, but out of your peripheral vision.

He knew you ignored his greetings, opting to focus on the game before you.

He found himself chuckling at your horrified screams, and your yells of protest when you were being chased by it, and Kaeya also found it amusing-- yet terrifying.

You had to put your console down while breathing heavily, shutting your eyes because you do not want to experience that ever again. It wasn’t an understatement, though, with your reaction, he knew you had to catch a breather after that horrid experience.

You craned your neck to where your lover was, smiling at his amused expression.

“Hi,” you breathed out, voice hoarse due to all the screaming you did. He laughed as a response, his eyes showing an emotion you could perceive as merriment. You really were an interesting character, one that he grew to love and cherish each day.

Your smile grew wider as he kissed the top of your head and sat down beside you, grabbing your chin as he kissed you on the lips.

“Well? Are you going to play?” this little shit. You jokingly rolled your eyes as you were greeted by a bunch of dolls packed in a room, muttering a ‘what’ you were greeted by the doll maker herself.

The Beneviento mansion was an eventful ride, you and Kaeya would say. He, however, paid attention to you more than he paid attention to the screen. What can he say? You were far more entertaining than that game, anyway.

Overall, Resident Evil with Kaeya is fun if you don’t mind him teasing you during the process. He might laugh at your screams, though, or sometimes he will say some profanities here and there, but it is enjoyable in the end.

CHILDE

God forbid this man play this game, otherwise, he’ll try and fight the lords the first time he meets them.

He was there when you first started playing the game, laughing loudly when you screamed for the first time.

(we all know he doesn’t choose to play because he sucks at video games-- choosing to fight in real life instead.)

When you screamed a suggestive comment when you met Lady Dimitrescu for the first time, he zoomed to where you were, flailing his arms around while screaming, “how about me?!” you ignored him, though.

He pouted when he heard you say, “Lady Dimitrescu does not tolerate incompetent beings! I will be the best ever.” He knew it was light hearted, but he cuddled up to your side.

A puppy, a lovesick puppy, he was. It was an adorable sight, really. You ruffled his hair a bit, and you swore you saw sparkles in his eyes. Why does he have to be so … so cute?

He was intolerable for some, but for you, you don’t even know if you want to continue the game.

He remained silent then. He knew you wanted to complete the game with no distractions, so he did his best to remain quiet-- the exact opposite of what he displayed to you moments ago.

He cheered you on whenever you had to kill the lords, even if you were obnoxiously faking a sob during Heisenberg’s part. You loved his character, what else is there to explain?

Secretly fuming due to your suggestive words and your compliments to Heisenberg and Dimitrescu. You knew this, though, and that further spurred you on.

Little shit cheered you on when you had to kill Dimitrescu’s daughters, since you were sending far too many suggestive comments to them for his liking. You, on the other hand, kept the crystal of their remains when they died, Childe wasn’t happy about that.

You cursed out the doll during the Beniviento mansion phase, though, and he had to deal with you cursing out the doll profusely.

He sat there with a lovesick smile, cheering you on; as always.

Overall, Resident Evil with Childe is not really that eventful. He’ll slide in some comments here and there, but will be also invested in the game due to the mechanics and the fighting styles. Something you didn’t play the game for, but it’s Childe.

Honestly, he might sleep while laying on your lap, if you don’t talk for a while. The ambience calms him.

ZHONGLI

He was drowning in his own thoughts when he heard you say ‘fuck you,’ assuming that it was directed to him, he turned his head to your direction, and let out a breath of relief.

He just wanted to observe you, really, you seem agitated, so he thought it was best to stay behind.

He couldn’t stop the big smile that paints itself on his face, though. You looked so distressed over a game-- wait, did you just openly suggest a make out session with Heisenberg?

You, however, were laughing when Heisenberg threw you down the hole, but your laughter quickly faded into yells of protest when you saw that mutated lycan.

“Wha--! Zhongli! Hello!” You announced loudly, yet your eyes weren’t glued to the man observing your interesting commentary, and he chuckled at that.

He didn’t respond, though, choosing to remain silent and watch your reactions due to the video game.

He finds this all amusing, really. How could a game make you scream so much? Let alone giving these characters who are trying to kill you some suggestive, sly comments their way.

You knew he heard your suggestive comment when you saw him halt his drinking for a second, that almost made you laugh.

Nonetheless, that didn’t stop you from screaming profanities and sly comments to Heisenberg, and you almost broke into a smile when you heard him laugh.

Zhongli is a quiet man at times. He doesn’t bring himself to talk when you are clearly focusing on that game, and he chooses to respect that. He always does.

But when you beckon him to lay down on your lap he couldn’t refuse, can he? Your smile made him unhesitant.

Setting his tea cup down, he sat beside you, laying his head on your lap. You let out a satisfying hum while his arms made its way onto your waist, hugging you from behind.

He wasn’t fazed at the transformations of the Lords, but he was quite surprised at their anatomy-- especially Moreau.

You both were disgusted by him, really. Give the Lord a break. Especially when he puked on you, Zhongli’s face said it all. He was disgusted, and you were as well.

Overall, Resident Evil with Zhongli is somewhat dull, but you made it fun, really. He would laugh occasionally, and that would make the experience a whole lot better.

During the cutscenes, he wants you to stroke his hair, please.

XIAO

Would be there in a second when you call out his name.

You called out his name in a fit of rage. (“if Xiao was here he would punt your ass, Moreau.”)

You almost cursed him out due to him appearing abruptly, and his scowl was apparent. Though, it quickly dissipated when he saw you fiddling with your fingers.

He sighed, sitting himself down beside you, crossing his arms, not wanting to look at you. You let out a sigh of relief, and continued your gameplay.

He heard screaming and profanities, making him snap out of his reverie. He looked at you, glare far from softening, hoping that would make you shut up, but much to his dismay, you did not.

He can’t deny that the Lords were quite unique, per se, but he was annoyed with the suggestive comments to Heisenberg, though. You do not have to say it.

He really doesn’t care about the game, instead wanting to rest on the couch. He can’t, though, he knew that, because you are screaming so fucking loud.

Not wanting to make you feel bad about it, he rested his head on the pillow beside you.

You quickly noticed his agitation to your volume, however, resorting to mumbles and incoherent words instead.

He was thankful, really, so he took a peak out of the pillow to see what you were playing.

You were fighting a whole ass dragon. That’s why you were so loud, of course you’d scream. But that was behind a screen, though?

It was realistic. That might have been the reason, really.

He loves your hands intertwining with his dark hair, softly caressing it when you have the time.

Resident Evil with Xiao might have been a little quieter when he came by, but with your lover by your side, it was definitely worth trading for the volume.

ALBEDO

Luckily, he was willing to stay and do his experiments in the same room as you, while you play Resident Evil.

He knows that the game is fictional, but he can’t help but wonder how Heisenberg made his so-called “Metal Army”.

Definitely will focus on his experiments rather than the game itself, although, he’ll sneakily listen to the dialogue and your reactions, but that doesn’t bother him.

He’s really patient, so you’re lucky, yet he can’t help but get annoyed due to the repetitive lines the Lords make when you have to fight them.

He won’t bother you about the game, really, he won’t do it since you remained patient with his devotion to his work, and he is incredibly thankful for that.

Sometimes, you will have to tone down your screams due to Albedo performing experiments. You don’t want his experiment to be ruined, now, don’t you?

Your reaction to fighting Miranda was one of the loudest-- if not, the loudest disbelieving yell he has ever heard in the duration of the game.

Fortunately for you, he wasn’t doing anything relevant to his research, so he jumped a little and settled down quite quickly. You were thankful for that, but seriously, did you have to scream that loud?

Resident Evil with Albedo is nothing special. He won’t pay attention to the game whatsoever, since it has nothing to do with him, but will pay attention to you if he wants to. In reality, he decided to conduct his experiments in the same room as you are in because he wants to spend time with you, even if you pay attention to the game more than he does.

You both cuddle after you both are done with what you are doing, though, and he couldn’t have asked for more comfort.

VENTI

You can be as loud as you want, since Venti won’t hesitate to scream as well.

Much like Kaeya, he will probably tease you for your reactions, but you don’t really mind.

You both scream while looking at Moreau’s final form, though. You both have never seen something so horrendous.

Venti’s playful and carefree nature compliments your mischievous act. You both would be the loudest, really.

You both would also mock Lady Dimitrescu and Heisenberg’s accents, yet you can’t help but slide in some sly comments to both of them

As a result, Venti would pout childishly. You would laugh at him, though, now focusing on the game before you.

You both hated the experience of defeating the baby mutation in the Beneviento mansion, screaming directions left and right, sometimes cursing the other out, while gluing both pairs of eyes to the screen.

Venti would cheer you on when you kill an animal, actually.

He would also make a ballad on the spot about Ethan Winters, during the game’s epilogue.

When you remain silent, however, choosing to be serious in one scene, he’d be the one to make the scene lighthearted, changing the atmosphere from intense to lively.

He would hug you from the side and squirm when you don’t give him enough attention. He wants to enjoy this game with you, too, you know?

You’d have to restrain him from grabbing the console and bomb everything up during a boss fight, however, he would definitely grab the console without permission.

Resident Evil is fun with Venti, maybe, the most fun out of all the characters above. He would be super interactive with you and the game, it would be a roller coaster of events with Venti with you.

And you will definitely pinch his cheeks with a big smile after playing.

06062021 , © kachuuya | do not claim my work as your own.

[minisugakoobies]

My dad says:

"Boys have a penis and girls have a vagina"

"Pay me what you owe me"

"Bitch better have his money"

"Make your next move, your best move"

"Hoe up or blow up"

"Not my problem"

"You either have it or you die"

"You don't have it so you die"

"You think people love you until you die"

"Ms YN! Did Ms. Palamine die? My dad said she would after the last parent teacher conference"

☠️

Luce, please! That is 100% exactly what Yoongi's daughter would walk around saying at school. 😂

Imagine when OC first met Lil' Dumpling on the first day:

*phone clicks, several beeps chirp*

"Line is secure. Hello, agent."

"Partner, I know you're new to this, but you know you don' t have to call me that, right? It's ___."

"Sorry, ___. How was your first day?"

"Not bad. Staff's nice. It's weird spending all day having conversations about pretty butterflies as opposed to mangled corpses, but I think I'll adjust."

"Hmm. I'm sure. Have you heard anything about the target from any of the other teachers?"

"Actually, I did find out quite a bit already. For example, did you know Min apparently walks around his house muttering the names of his enemies under his breath? Full names, too. Guess he forgets that even little ears can hear well." A laugh slips from your lips. "He's also really fond of hip-hop, especially Wu Tang. You've not lived until you've heard a six-year-old child rapping C.R.E.A.M. while making two Barbies engage in a shootout with some G.I. Joes."

"Fuck. You're already getting names? And from his daughter?"

"Yep. Kid's a goldmine. In a few weeks, I should have enough intel to bring him down."

"What if the kid clams up?"

"Oh. Don't worry. Even if the kid stops singing, I'll find a way."

[giganoodle]

[Sonnet] You jerk you didn't call me up

You jerk you didn't call me up I haven't seen you in so long You probably have a fucking tan & besides that instead of making love tonight You're drinking your parents to the airport I'm through with you bourgeois boys All you ever do is go back to ancestral comforts Only money can get—even Catullus was rich but Nowadays you guys settle for a couch By a soporific color cable t.v. set Instead of any arc of love, no wonder The G.I. Joe team blows it every other time Wake up! It's the middle of the night You can either make love or die at the hands of the Cobra Commander _________________ To make love, turn to page 121. To die, turn to page 172.

BY BERNADETTE MAYER

[jennsmischievousmind]

Fucks not Found

Haunt the Living

Ch1 Ghosts | Ch2 Florence | Ch3 A Matter of Seconds | Ch4 I need a Backdoor | Ch5 Die Hard | Ch6 White Flag | Ch7 Haunt the Living | Ch8 One, but not done [end]

“Time clock, guys let’s go!”

Riding the hors-bord was fun not gonna lie, better than any Disneyland ride.

“Side doors opening. Subs in place," you announced "Four the comms?”

“Comms cut. we’re good.” 

You got on the Kismet, guns at point except for Five. Two and Three joined everyone at the rear of the yacht. Three was in bad shape, limping and making a mess of blood everywhere he’d go. Being his grumpy self, he rejected Five’s help, he was fine.

Responsible of Murat you were always in contact with him, and so hacking the military meeting room to hear his brother’s bullshit.

“Listen closely. The enemy is us. We must target him not where he is strong but where he's weak. Hospitals, to take away his safety. Schools, to take away his future. Youth, to suffocate his hope. Commence gas attack.”

His evil speech made you shiver, this so called human shit head.

“Murat you got to step in, right now!” You heard Rovach’s voice being cut off and Murat taking over. “Join me, brothers. So you don't have to kill your own people again.” You let out the breath you were holding.

“Murat has the high ground” you keep the squad informed, then turned to Three. “Hey G.I J,” you handed him his Kevlar.

“They have some fancy food up there.” you rolled your eyes knowing he was going to ramble.

One mimicked you “Really? Tell me more about that. Don't hold back.”

“This fish soup they call... labu... labuan...” Three was ranting, obviously because he was stressed as fuck.

One had heard enough “I'm fucking kidding. Focus.” But Three wasn’t done yet, they started their usual quarrel. 

“It's so delicious, man. They put this little cheese on it.”

“Does it have to be on the walkie-talkie? And we're all standing right here. Yeah?” 

“Don't you give me attitude, okay?”

“Over and out,” One warned

“I...” Three quivered, holding back his rant, you patted his shoulders holding back a laugh. 

“Okay, Rovach’s in his panic room,”

You ran to the engine room.

“When I pop this, the magnet pulse lasts for 15 seconds.” One pressed the screen. “Welcome to the world's biggest magnet.”

"Four, still on top?" One inquired

"Always" his cheeky voice boomed in the comm

One gagged, he got the wrong idea all alone. We split then, Two and Three went to the second deck. Stepping on the main deck Five followed One, while you followed Seven, the 4 of you hiding behind low walls, ready to activate One’s magnet.

“Fuck!” you cocked your head at One’s voice.

“Ah, fucking American-made! The fucking chip fell out.”

“What?” Five almost yelled.

You sighed “I told you to be gentle with it!“

“The chip fell out!”

“Well, fix it.” Seven argued

“I can't just fix it, all right!” The phone is very fucking complicated.”

“Give it to Eight then!” Five pushed One’s arm, you extended your arm exasperate.

“CONTACT” Seven suddenly yelled. Redirecting your attention to the shore, you saw a bunch of military guys ready to shoot at you. Seven and you immediately covered One and Five, the guards dropping dead in an instant.

“Wow,” you look at the mess on the shore and at your gun.

“Hey,” Seven handed you a mag “it’s us or them.”

The shooting roused the bodyguards on the main deck, they started shooting, great.

“One! put the phone down and use your gun.” 

“I got it, I got it, I got it” he almost laughed, this old man really!

“GRENADE!” Seven yelled pushing you backwards out of harms way.

“ONE!” you screamed

It all went so fast, the grenade left off the floor in a fastens, sticking on a wall far from you, people flew around the boat, smashing into the walls, hung on the metal parts of the yacht.

"Alright Baby Yoda's on board" you muttered to yourself watching the scene unfold before you.

One kept oo-ing at his own device, not expecting a result like this one. 15 seconds out, they all fell down from the walls and began heading for your area. One pressed it. They flew to the other side.

"Holy shit!“ 

The bodyguards had chest armors, made with metal that’s why they were moved around like puppets, One and his giant magnet being the puppeteer.

“Wow I mean, I wasn't "sure" sure it’d work. I had a suspicion, but I, uh” One ranted while you 3 look at him in disbelief, he wasn’t sure? ... "God, this is all so fucking dangerous.” 

“I hate you so much!” you threw him your empty mag.

“Move!” Seven lead the way

“Hey, hey! You like that phone now, motherfucker?” One kept ranting at Seven who didn't even care.

“This thing is amazing.” he was like a teen who'd seen tits for the first time.

Three and Two were covering the stairs, Three was wowed by the magnetic field. 

“Stop fucking around. We gotta find Rovach." One acted like he wasn’t wowed a second ago.

“Yeah well he's ass is still in the panic room.” you show him the CCTV of the room.

“The backdoor is near the kitchen, the deck above.” Two reloaded her gun, and tightenned her ponytail, you look at her, she was damn too gorgeous for a gun fight.

“Four, still with us?” you called in

“You have to move fast," he huffed “This boat is fucking huge, they’re coming from everywhere.” 

You ran up, Seven and One leading while Two was covering behind. You never leaving Five's side. One stood up ready to enter the kitchen when a shot fired from inside. One dropped down, activating the magnet in a flash. The 8 guards came flying into the walls, followed by utensils like sharp knives..

You slide next to One “you good?” 

He seethed “I’ll live,”

“Let’s go” Seven motionned to you for cover. Standing behind him a hand on his shoulder. He shoot at the remaining guards Two hadn’t shot yet. In the corner of your eye you caught One’s juggling with the phone before it hit the ground.

“More guys coming” Three announced

“Flashbang!” you threw it in, before coming in with Three and Seven, getting rid of the incoming guards. The boat started moving.

“Magnet! Where is the magnet?” Three screamed, there were too many guys for you 4 to handle.

“Fix the phone!”

“I'm trying! The screen is cracked!” he yelled back at Seven, next to you.

 “I TOLD you to be EXTRA gentle with it!!”

“Fuck you Eight!”

The look you gave him, if he wasn't your boss you would have shot him! Three and you shot a few guys coming east.

“We get it! One yelled exasperated “They're dead!”

“Stop yelling at us!”

"Shit.” Seven sighed. "They got our position. We need to move."

Two ran to kill the engine.

“We should split up.”

Seven and three took off, you stuck with Five and One.

Five went to talk to a security guy pined to the wall by some rotisserie meat fork “What the fuck?” 

As soon as she approached him another guy sprung out, before you could cover her, she dodged his fist, grabbed a extinguisher ready to smash him, you look at her proudly, but the thing flew from her hands heading to guard’s face. One had activated the magnet again.

“I feel like a Jedi.”

“That's not how the Force works!” you rolled your eyes.

Rovach's head of bodyguards ran into the kitchen, you held up your gun to shoot him but One pushed Five your way, so the guard would follow him not you 2. His sudden concerned for his teammates, had you baffled for a second.

“Five, flush him out.” he groaned ino the comm

‘Go, go’ you guide her to the deck, looking back at One, he kinda had it handle, still fighting with the bodyguard on the ground.

"Find Rovach. I'll distract the guards." Four stated in the comm.

"I’ll cover Five! Five and Eight going for Rovach.” Five held your shoulder glancing back while you lead the way. 

Sudden explosions had you tumble against the railing, Five grabbing a hold of you before you could trip over for a dip.

"Thanks" you look at your watch, it wasn’t supposed to blow now.

"One, bad timing!"  

He only grunt back, nearing Rovach's suite, you were still shielding Five behind you, shooting at anyone coming your way.

“I've got four guys on me. I'm on the upper deck, and I'm screwed.”

“Come on Four,” you muttered to yourself.

“We're in Rovach's stateroom." Five announced as you stealthily entered the panic room.. the asshole coming out of it as soon as you entered without seeing you.

“One, Rovach is leaving with a guard. What do you want us to do?” Five asked while you covered the door.

One ignored her, “Four, where are you at?” he asked over the comm

“One, please help me!” Four’s strained voice echoed in the comm, something was wrong, your heart clenched.

“Four? Give me a hint, buddy.” you could hear One running. 

Waiting for his next order you became agitated hearing Four’s cry of help but you couldn’t let Five on her own. You started breathing in and out loudly to calm yourself, you still had to protect Five and yourself.

“What's your 20?” Seven asked One “Anybody got eyes on the target?”

“Negative," you answered Seven

“I don't know my 20. Stay off the channel. I'm going for Four.” 

You look at Five, One going out of his way was unusual..

“Four, where you at, buddy?”

“You're breaking your own rules.” you could hear Seven’s smirked, your lips twitched.

“We gotta move,” you ran to the safe-boat area, since Rovach couldn’t board a boat anywhere but here.

“Hey” Five squeezed your arm, then look ahead, a hors-bord was getting away, with Rovach in it. 

“One,” you tried to focused back on the mission, “I got a shot, your call. It’s right now!”

“Don’t shoot!”

“But...” you lowered your gun. But you had no time to worry about Rovach when you heard Four cry out as a cracking sound resonated in the comm, a gasp leaving your lips. Before you could yell at One to help him, Five snapped you out of it when she screamed seeing a guy coming. He shoot once, you shoved Five behind you, shooting back he dropped dead. 

“Eight, you...” Five hold your arm

"Y/N..." Four whimpered your name, his voice so low you could barely hear it. Heart clenching, you stumble on the railing.

“It's a big ship. Say something, pal.” One was still looking for him

“He’s going to kill me." 

“Billy stay with me...” Five glanced at you, your eyes became teary, you bite your lips holding a groan.

“Eight” One warned as you used Four’s name.

You tried to regain your composure, ready to shoot, but your hands were shaking. The yacht had become unusually quiet, most of the guards were down. You heard a single gunshot on the upper deck.

“There you are." One's voice sounded relieved. "Cleavers”

A silence then Four's voice cut it “Whut?”

“It’s TV show, come on let’s go, fucking Millennials. Eight focus.”

“I am focus!” sniffing you let out a sigh, you shook your head at Five, but she didn't listen.

“Eight has been hit, we got to go.” you hissed at her.

“Shit, Eight?” Four inquired, worry in his voice.

“I’m fine,” you grabbed the railing holding your side “it grazed me.”

“She’s not! Shut up.” Five put your arm around her neck leading you up the stairs.

“The ship is still sinking guys!” Two interfered

“Murat?’ you called out in the comm. The thump of an helicopter drew nearer.

“Meeting point!” One called out

Five run to the upper deck followed by your limping ass, soon collided with Two and Three.

“Hey lovebirds” Five joked

You look around still alert until One appeared in your peripheral vision, he tapped your shoulder in reassuring gesture, eyeing your side, you nodded.

Four followed, holding his right arm. He held you close until it was your turn to board. Aboard the chopper, you made a sling out of a shemagh for him while Five argued with you to stop moving so she could heal your injury.

“It’s just a bruise” he muttered to you while you tied it around his neck “hey” you finally looked at him, worry still filling your eyes. “Gah” you cried out as Five patched your own injury. Four chuckled at your stubbornness, he kissed your forehead as you leaned on him slightly, seething. No one cared about how close you were with Four, everyone was focused on getting the shithead.

It was one of his choppers, so no doubt he’d get in to save his ass. And he did. Seeing Three was about the choke the Rovach’s guard you scoot closer to Four, but stayed alert just in case.

As the chopper was nearing a refugee camp, the all team had a hard time seeing the desolation in these camp. No human-being should live that way, no child should be out there seeing people die, this isn’t a life, it’s surviving day after day without knowing what’s to come.

Seeing One’s face you understood why he started this strike team, so somewhere someone could do something governments were afraid to do, or were not willing to, to keep their privileges.

This camp was one of many Rovach’s liked to gaz. One opened the chopper’s door, Rovach immediately tried to bargain for his life. The chopper lower down, One did what he had to do, what he might have dreamed to do. He shoved Rovach out the chopper, 3 meters fall with a lovely welcome ceremony from the "rebels" leaving in the camp. Sticks and stones, punches and kicks, revenge.

The team watched as the people get their revenge on Rovach. Everyone sighed, finally, the team’s first mission was done, a success.

Four discreetly intertwined his fingers with yours, you look at him, you’d never imagine finding someone after cutting yourself from the world. Looking around you smile at this new crazy family. One would argued on that obviously.

The chopper did a pit stop near a base in the desert.

“I told you, bruise.” Four removed his arm from the sling to get dressed properly. You punched is arm, he flinched. “What's with you and scaring me!”

“I'm not the one who got shot.” he said lifting an eyebrow, you frowned, he was kinda right, he looked around “Damn I'm sorry alright, and you scared me too luv! ” he took your hand in his swiftly kissing it.

After a few minutes you watched as everyone was looking far in the distance in silence. “Are we posing for Vanity Fair or what? Let’s go home!”

Getting on the jet, you went to talk to One, about what happened on the boat, as he was not there yet, you sat in his seat in the cockpit.

“Y/N huh?” you turned your head to see Seven in the airlock.

“Blaine,” you smiled, now he knew your name.

“Hey by the way, I’m sorry about your brother,”

“We don’t talk about Six,” One’s voice startled you.

“..Why’s that?” Seven asked him as he walk past to his seat.

As he wasn't answering you stood up in the cramp cockpit “Because it makes One cry,” letting One sit you patted his shoulder. “We got to talk, old man.” You left the airlock almost crashing into Three. 

“Bring us back to that fucking California desert papi!” 

Last chapter ; Eighth chapter - One, but not done

A/N: don't forget to double tap if you liked it. 🙏

[imaginethatneathuh]

So

I've been on an American Gods kick if you couldn't tell.

And there's something I've noticed related to both sides of the war pertaining to smoking and specifically Mad Sweeney, Czernobog, and Technical Boy.

They're the only ones who I've seen smoke.

I'm not counting Samedi (Not sure if he actually smoked or it was because of Brigitte that I associate him with it), Brigitte, or Laura. I don't know enough about the first two and Laura isn't a god.

I could easily be wrong though. Other gods may have smoked and I just haven't noticed. But that's beside the point.

Now, I'm not really going to be talking about Czernobog because we don't see much of him but I will discuss him a little.

Czernobog gets his smokes in cartons from stores. A la, his first appearance in Season 1. Shadow goes out, buys several packs and in the next episode we see Odin give them to Czernobog.

Mad Sweeney, from what I've seen, rolls his own smokes. Every time I see him with a smoke, it looks hand rolled. We even see him shakily make his own in Season 2 Episode 7. I doubt this is the first time it's been on screen but that's the one I remember off the top of my head.

Then we have Technical Boy. He vapes. That's obvious. We see it several times. It's even pointed out in his first appearance.

Why am I pointing this out?

Simple. Because what they smoke and how they get it is kinda interesting.

I'm not going to call it important because it probably isn't, but it is interesting.

•

You see, Czernobog's smokes are prepacked and in packs in the cartons. Though, he may buy individual packs if he has to, it's cheaper to buy the 10-pack cartons. (Mum's a smoker, Dad used to be, Stepdad is also a smoker. I know what I'm talking about.)

What's so interesting is that Czernobog, before Season 2 Episode 1 (could be 2, not entirely sure) wasn't fully onboard with the war between the Old and New Gods. He lost a game of Checkers to Shadow. That was the only reason he went to the meeting. Czernobog's smokes were indicative of him being old and fading away but still having a foot in the modern world - there was still a chance for him to continue living despite the bad stuff - as cigarettes are still prevelant but we now that we know the risks, they're becoming less popular.

•

With Mad Sweeney, as I said before, he rolls his own smokes. Of course, the cigarette paper and the tobacco are probably from a store, but it's a lot cheaper than prepacked cigarettes. Now, Mad Sweeney may prefer doing it by hand because it's cheaper (if he's looking for strong cigarettes, he could easily get straight ones. They don't have filters. Or even filtered ones, which are just as strong but easier on the throat) or it may be a comment on him as a character.

Mad Sweeney is old, like Czernobog. Not the oldest, but certainly old. I don't know if he's older than Czernobog, mostly because I don't care. Nevertheless, he's old. We know that.

Sweeney has a lot of gold, but the price of gold changes, it fluctuates. You can't just go somewhere and get thousands in cash from trading gold. He isn't rich, money-wise. If he was, I doubt he'd look like that. (Don't get me wrong, I love him and his haircut, it fits him, but why? Please, get a proper cut. Somewhere. Anywhere!)

I'm bringing this up because of his smokes. Most people, like Czernobog, buy prepackaged and prerolled smokes. There are very few that I've met who roll them themselves. The only people I know that I can think of right now is my Dad's stepdad and my Mum when we didn't have enough money to get the cartons. Hand rolling, in my experience, is something that either really poor people do or old people. This is reflected in Mad Sweeney.

What I'm trying to get at is, Mad Sweeney is poor AND old. His ideals are old. Modern people, especially those who are in the service, veterans or families of veterans, know that there is nothing honourable about war. One of my uncles is a vet and it really fucked him up. He still won't talk about it and it's been years. Most people know there's no honour in it! There are people who still sign up and fight because they think it's honourable and right, but those people are more old fashioned and so are their families. In my experience at least. Mad Sweeney views dying in battle as something he owes because he chickened out the first time. He thinks he should die on the battlefield. Personally, I find that a very old fashioned way of thinking.

And I think that's the point. He is old fashioned. Even how he speaks on love is old fashioned. Not getting into that though.

Honestly, I could talk your ear off on Mad Sweeney and his character but I'm going to move one. At this point I'm probably losing you. I think I might even be losing myself.

•

I'm going to say this before anything else on this topic. Unlike with cigarettes - which I've had to deal with my entire life - I don't know much about vaping. I don't have much experience with it. I only know what I've been told and the things I've seen.

•

While I can talk about cigarettes and Mad Sweeney all day, Technical Boy and his vaping is probably the most interesting to me.

I don't know if he vapes regular pods too or if he just uses the synthetic toad skins. I don't know the inner workings of his, I think you call them vape pens? I don't know. Like I said before, I don't know much about them or how Technical Boy uses them.

What I do know is his is different than probably all of the ones on the market. His looks like one of those frogs who can get their throat really bloated. (A frog has a toad in it. I'm sorry. That has nothing to do with the topic of discussion.)

If you know anything about vaping, you know that early on, vape pens had a habit of exploding. I don't know if this is still true, but I do know that it was. Kinda like how several other choices of his in Season 2 ended up blowing up in his face, vape pens had a habit of doing that to people who smoked them.

Vapes are also symbols of entitled Millennials and Gen Zs like myself. This fits in with Technical Boy as a New God and character. He's an entitled asshole, much like how older generations seem to view younger ones. That's the meme, anyway.

Technical Boy is young, obnoxious, extravagant, a complete asshole and does have some good points on certain things. Even if a lot of his choices and points end up blowing up in his face or getting ignored and he gets punished for speaking out like in Season 1 and 2, especially in Season 1 Episode 5 and basically the entirety of the first half of Season 2.

•

What I'm trying to get at is Mad Sweeney, Czernobog, and Technical Boy's smoking habits reflect who they are as characters. From old-fashioned, hand rolling Young and Old Boomer generations (Mad Sweeney) to the tired, retirement-wanting G.I. and Silent generations (Czernobog) to the often clout-chasing, explosive, and, more often than not, too knowledgeable on certains things but also too dumb to properly and calmly explain anything Millennial and Gen Z generations (Technical Boy).

•

Let's be honest here, I'm probably looking way too into this and it likely isn't that deep. It's probably just a way to distinguish the old and the new But, that'd be cool if it was.