#Game you better not have fucking nuked them like you did with both of my Amara files I WILL ACTUALLY CRY I had them since i first git BL3

[kylos-starlight]

*sweating nervously* B-Borderlands 3 keeps crashing with my main FL4K and boy... I am getting.... GETTIN' A LITTLE NERVOUS!

[sleepyconfusedpotato]

He can't be FR 😭😭

NOPE. NO. Nu-Uh. No no no no.

Nonono. No No No. Nopedy nope.

No. No no no no no no. NOPE.

NOPE.

(Edit : The account is most likely fake, since apparently both Sam and Elliot don't have TT account. The bts videos was also in Elliot's IG so let's take it with grain of salt)

Okay look. As much as I want the boys and girls to be happy and thrive and live on, I want something BAD to happen to them. Hear me out.

OG!Makarov (for those who don't know...) was such a destructive force. He single-handedly started World War 3, nuked cities, took down NATIONS. He was the literal ultimate enemy.

For the last two games, Barkov was not the best villain (yes he invaded Urzikstan but he only appeared in very few scenes), while in MWII we literally only chase Hassan around, like Valeria and Graves were a better villain (they were not the supposedly main villain).

MWII lacked the grit and guts that the OG!MW had. OG!MW did NOT hesitate on taking down cities, nations, and most importantly they DID NOT hesitate to KILL OFF characters or at least let something BAD happen to the characters. Like for instance, in the end of OG!MW2, Soap fucking got STABBED IN THE CHEST by Shepherd. NOW THAT IS THE SHIT.

(+ there are dramatic quick time events. BRING BACK QUICK TIME EVENTS)

Again, for those who don't know, OG!MW3 ended with ALL of 141 dying except Price. Yes you read that right.

Now, what I would want to see is for the reboot!Makarov be the destructive force that he is. Take down cities, nations. Kill people without remorse. SHOW US that he is indeed the ultimate enemy. How?

Let bad things happen to the boys. Let 141 FAIL. Not the "oh we fail, try next time." But the "people-fuxking- died-critical-consequences-perilous-dreadful-we FUCKED UP" Failure. The failure where you can't go back. The failure that has timely consequences. Where it's irrevirsable.

Let them fail, and then let us see how they cope with failure. Let us see how they come back together. Let us see a development on the characters on how they should face this archenemy.

Who do I think would die?

I have one person on my mind.

Kate Laswell.

Imagine 141 without Laswell's voice to guide them. Imagine a mission without Laswell's voice of reason. Voice of security that everything will be fine.

Imagine Price losing Laswell.

Now that is a version of Price that I would want to see.

This campaign will be interesting...

[zeciex]

I am very interested to know Daemon's opinion about Aemond once Bastion is over. Not just Luke's death, but as a dangerous adversary or not, so far he's the one eyed fucker, someone insignificant. What I like about this rivalry is that it's the same people but on different sides and 20 years younger. As much as Daemon hates him he has to see himself reflected in him.

Oh yeah there's definitely a lot of similarities between Aemond and Daemon, something I keep in mind when I write, and at the same time, if Daemon goes back to the same age as Aemond, then I still think Daemon would body Aemond lol

While they both have a huge ego and sees themselves as a force of nature, Aemond's ego is very inflated--the whole 'if he dares face me' thing like... boy, he'd wipe the floor with you. And I think it stems from the Hightower part of Aemond.

We see in the books that Aemond think of himself as a strategic genius, but he really isn't. He goes directly into a trap because Daemon bruises his ego/he is obsessed with beating Daemon. Daemon plays into this. He knows Aemond thinks of himself as his equal--or even superior, and that's where they differ, because Daemon is very calculated, he knows how to play the game and he takes big risks because he has a better chance of getting away with shit.

Before the Stepstones Daemon did tourneys and was a fucking spectacle, like he was a true showman. He was also put in a position where he could grow as a solider when he was made Commander of the City Watch. Daemon can be charming and he's blunt in a way that makes people like him.

Aemond on the other hand has an inferiority complex. He hasn't been put into a leadership position, he studies and practices with Ser Criston, but he's got no experience just a whole lot of bravado. Which is what ultimately leads him to his death. And while I do think he can be charming--there is something off-putting about him that the general populous of Westeros doesn't like. He doesn't really hold anyone outside of his own close family in high regard, and people notice that. (His trauma and scar and all that of course doesn't help, and he swings around the notion that he's got the biggest nuke of them all, which is fair, but also Vhagar is getting on in her years. He's very proud and it can make him very rigid)

That being said, I do love my little 'if he dares face me' Aemond!

In A Vow of Blood Daemon thinks of Aemond as nothing more than a little annoying child--he never really thought of him before the whole thing with Daenera, and because of the thing with Daenera, he thinks of him as little one-eyed cunt. He doesn't see him as a real opponent, just someone he doesn't like and wants to remove his head from his shoulders. He is a Hightower and he usurped Rhaenyra and he is now holding Daenera hostage...

Aemond will get some reality checks from Daenera that will ultimately make him grow as a tactician/strategist (or so I hope) and I want to make him more... well... I want to make him an actual threat. I want him to be a force of nature as Daemon is.

They are similar, and yet, dissimilar and the only reason they are dissimilar is because Daemon was allowed to be wild and chaotic because of Viserys, while Aemond is held back for the same reason + his Hightower-ness.

[crystalelemental]

Sync Pair Retrospective - Ash

Third Anniversary began not with a bang, but with the most mundane reveal I've seen in a while.  They literally just showed the sync pairs in an email some people got.  That was it.  That’s how we got word of what was coming.  I guess they eventually did a big flashy trailer, but no setup or hype like second anniversary at all.  It was incredibly lame.  And to make matters worse, they brought in Ash.  Listen, this is my one shot: I do not like Ash.  He’s always the least interesting character in his own story.  Pikachu is just as bad.  It’s not even that cute, and it’s, at this point, wildly overhyped as the mascot.  Getting two Pikachus for anniversary sucked ass, getting one of them with anime was awful for me in particular, and the salt in the wound was that the rats are obscenely strong.

Ash is the Striker.  Just...broadly.   Electric-type damage, with Kanto Spirit, perfect self-setup, and the new Buddy moves.  These have had a wide range of effects, but Ash's is the purest iteration.  The more gauge you have, the bigger your damage, with a total Base Power of over 1000 at max gauge.  Even off-type, Ash's buddy move is a delete button.  He and SST Red are the only current team that’s beaten 1000 strength in High Score.  The fucked thing is he's a Striker, and has a sync nuke with a really respectable amount of power behind it too.  His grid layout is immaculate, giving him everything he wants, including a second shot at buddy move, with no energy issues at all.  I remember being annoyed because skills that should cost more just didn't, solely so he could be perfect.  It's annoying.

To make matters worse, Ash brought his plot armor.  Endurance, with a guaranteed second application of it after the first was used, and healing potential.  Ash has so much about just not dying it's ridiculous, and it's really this which propelled him from just a funny numbers man into a legitimate, unstoppable menace.  Buddy Move would always make him relevant, but frail strikers can be overwhelmed, especially in the AoE meta.  But with Double Endurance?  There's a reason you can find a lot of Ash solos.

Obviously, no one has challenged Ash as an Electric-type.  I mean.  Someone did, but we'll...we'll get to that thing.  But there was a competitor.   Champion Marnie came in with the same approach as a striker with Double Endurance. And personally?  I think Marnie does it better.  This is entirely because Marnie has a serious flinch rate behind her attacks.   The power of her moves is devastating, and a well-timed flinch keeps things on lock.  Buuuut there's also a reason Ash's Gauntlet solo count is higher than hers.  Speed control.  Having your moves cost less gauge really is a selling point for Gauntlet solos.  Hint. Hint.

He did get one new playmate in SS Hau.  Who is worse than SST Red, let’s not even pretend.  Hau covers a lot of similar ground, but mostly just has Mind Games debuffs without needing to paralyze the opponent.  That’s it.  That’s all Hau offers to Ash.  And this is the only real change that’s occurred.  Nothing else has mattered to Electric types.

It's hard to talk about Ash's changes across the meta, since...well, I don't have him.  I'd like to say that the new CS parameters slowed him down a little.  But truth be told, I doubt they did.  He just has so much power behind his attacks. It's...hard to talk about Ash with anything other than superlatives.  He's one of those sync pairs I get slightly annoyed at because they're designed to be almost too good.  If this game were more about chasing meta, he'd be both a mandatory pull of his era, and by now hilariously powercrept to irrelevance.  So I guess it speaks well to the structure of the game that he's still among the best to ever do it.  Even if I am very sick of him and Pikachu.  Shoutouts to Liko, am I right?

But what’s really interesting is statistics.  This is informal, and only polls redditors, but it’s a nice microcosm of the broader pool.  Someone monitored EX frequency and rate.  How many players EX’d each pair, and how many players who own that pair have them EX?  Notably, SST Red is top five Master Fairs by absolute value, but not top 10 by rate.  Most people pulled him, but not everyone bothered to EX him, because why would he need it?  Aura Cynthia is top two by rate, but not top 10 by absolute value.  Not everyone got her, but if you did, you likely full invested.  What’s interesting is that Ash isn’t on either list.  That implies that, of the anniversary, Ash was the least pulled.  Which could mean one of two things.  The thing I’d like to believe is that the anime isn’t popular, don’t do this again.  But the more likely outcome?  SST Red was disgusting, and most F2P players knew to put their gems there.  Some may not have, and instead went Cynthia, because despite constant bitching about it, Supports always have value.  Ash, for all his power...is just damage.  And his damage is overkill.  Ash answers a question with some certainty.  There is a such thing as a Striker that goes so far they’re unnecessary.  More is needed than just being big damage.  Hitting for a billion damage isn’t enough when compared to broad utility.

That or he’s just less popular than Red, known favorite child of the masses, and Cynthia, #1 series waifu.  One of those things.

[ziracona]

And this is why I preferred Miranda Lawson; she actually grows and changes as a person over the course of the ME games and Vivienne is sadly lacking in that department. I'm terrified that making Leliana Divine will result in the College of Enchanters suffering some horrible fate in DA4 and it will be because of Vivienne and we'll be unable to prevent it.

Oh, they're too coward to let the world branch much. Branching is hard, so either you have to Put Choices on a Bus (Telltale's favorite), Move the Story (often the best option--Fallout does this), Prune the Tree (DA seems to lean hard into this, worst option), or just make a complicated as shit game. The first few DAs did a good job of just making an insanely branching game. But they got way too ambitious, especially in DAI, and I would put cold, hard cash on them picking the worst option (prune the tree) over either of the better ones. Put On A Bus being 'The characters or choices went somewhere else and we don't really interact with them again, but you get to know your choices mattered'--good examples being Harvey's fate in Telltale Batman, the entire cast of TWDG S3 sans Clementine and AJ, or Jowan in DAO. Move the Story being a Fallout favorite. We let you shape the Mojave? Ok. The next game takes place with a new cast in a totally different part of the US! Doesn't really allow for choices to port, but you get the fun of a familiar world and /some/ repeat characters, like MacCready, but lose 0 of the importance of your choices. Pruning the Tree, sadly, is the most common for many companies. Basically, if the choices branch too far, cut them off. We want Lelianna in DAI even if she was killed in DAO? Magically alive. Too many fates for Alistair? Let's start bumping him off in some of them slowly so we don't have to follow all the threads. Players can start with drastically different Thedases? Nuke some of the choices completely. I don't know if they'll go so far as to take out the College, because I think they want it there--it exists even if Vivienne is Divine. But they want both and both in conflict, so no matter what players do, they'll make both exist at war with each other. It's the most annoying way to handle choices, bc it invalidates them the most. : / But yeah, I don't really care unless I hear they suddenly un-fucked the ethics of the whole franchise in DW, but I do not hold hope in my heart. Rip, DA, you were a real one. F in the chat to a former king...

[darklink82]

World of Darkness VS Chronicles of Darkness

So I got bored and looked through the lore for both WOD and COD and I thing I found the one primary difference. In Chronicles all the games have equal importance to the mythology of the setting and all of their backstories could just be myths and legends. additionally the games are better designed for crossovers so you can do more all encompassing stuff and use the lore and enemies from the different games more easily.

In World, no matter what game your playing, you're playing a spinoff of Mage: The Ascension. Like seriously it's ridiculous just how much Mage makes all the other games fucking tiny in comparison.

Vampire: "I prevented another vampire from taking over Seattle by the skin of my teeth."

Mage: "Oh yeah that happened in Budapest once, The Technocracy had to nuke the artificial cloud cover and kill all the vamps with an orbital sunlight canon. Then they cloned replacements of all the civilians killed to keep things quiet."

Vampire: "w...what"

Werewolf: "I had to prevent Pentex from polluting the ocean in order to summon a Servant of the Wyrm by blowing up the factory.

Mage: "Yeah had to deal with something similar. Like 50 servants tried to get into one of the Void Engineer's underwater cities in order to gain access to a portal that led to their Sun to Earth radius dyson sphere and I had to help fight them off to prevent a solar system wide catastrophe."

Werewolf: "What the f-"

Mage: "Also did you know that the Technocracy MADE Pentex in the First Place"

Werewolf: "Say....say sike right now"

Seriously the scale of Mage fucking DWARFS the scale of all the other games its fucking hilarious.

[preemshots]

johnny + the nomads lore

alright, i know this is a screenshots blog but i'm going to go ahead and start dropping some juicy lore tidbits as i dig them up. part of what i'm doing outside of just photo diarying is shard hunting, and BOY is there a lot the game likes to hide in those little shards for idiots like me who like to read so we can write unnecessarily accurate fanfiction! 

full disclosure, i know jack shit about the TTRPG/cyberpunk 2020 rulebook except what i read in the wikis. 

so here’s my lore roundup so far of everything i know about johnny joining the nomads

we know johnny likes to narrate v’s quest objectives. here’s the first mention where he says it himself: 

during the voodoo boys quest "transmission" there's a shard in the maglev tunnels beside the ice bath, presumably from brigitte's research into johnny in the first place:

okay, so the timeline is this: johnny joins the nomads after trying and failing to rescue alt. johnny hides out in the badlands for some years. then he and rogue come back to night city and nuke arasaka tower help alt escape the arasaka subnet by uploading liberator to their network once and for all.

this ultimately makes sense. in alt’s flashback, we meet santiago, who is a nomad/connected to nomads, joins rogue and johnny when they're trying to get alt back, and eventually becomes the leader of the aldecaldos. 

part of santiago’s TTRPG lore is that he, johnny, and rogue have to lay low in the badlands with nomads after they storm arasaka headquarters (i am aware the game takes many liberties with the original lore so who knows the full accuracy of anything from the original rulebooks)

ENDING spoilers: in the rogue+johnny storming AHQ ending, it's revealed that rogue has a son while they're prepping for the job. if you eavesdrop on her calling him while you're at the afterlife, you hear her tell her son to (paraphrasing here) "pull over and look at the stars", which immediately made my brain go to: nomad, badlands, santiago = dad? maybe. (santiago also canonically has a son according to the TTRPG lore)

this immediately reminded me of another interesting shard that i believe you can find in multiple locations around night city: “"what REALLY happened in arasaka tower?“

i love this dang shard. at first i thought it was just a cute conspiracy with some juicy gossip (and i love how 99% of the shards that mention johnny in this game are reminding us that he's not a real rebel, he's a poser) but it brings some interesting shit together

one: it tells us where johnny got his hands on the nukes! he and the nomads jumped a militech convoy and jacked some bombs! 

which is never directly explained, even as saburo arasaka is interrogating him shortly before using soulkiller. very nice of johnny to protect his homies like that. 

...or maybe he didn’t. saburo emphasizes that the dead don’t lie like the living do, and we don’t know what exactly arasaka did to johnny’s construct in mikoshi. 

it also explains why the obvious media narrative is that militech nuked arasaka, a nice neat political bow to the end of the fourth corpo wars, which is an entire section of the TTRPG lore that makes my eyes cross when i read it. 

it also makes the star/nomads ending extremely interesting, because i originally believed it was the ending where V’s journey deviates the most from rewalking johnny’s path... which also has weird implications if the johnny’s nomad era is being kept from v. 

(this also leads into my belief that the star ending/the devil ending are narratively two sides of the same coin, but that’s a WHOLE ANOTHER POST for another day.)

TWO, just straight up the fact that they turned the raid where they actually obtained the nukes into an action flick BD that pretty much ANYONE could watch. who the hell was doing that?? 

well, who else other than the guy who johnny (optionally) punched the shit out of for filming alt's death: thompson, media guy, and according to rogue, “bad luck”. because you know, recording your crimes is straight up evidence that can be used against you.

during the alt flashback we meet thompson, and just after that in cyberspace before meeting alt, johnny tells v that he has no idea what happened to him and that they never worked together again. 

oh, johnny, you lying bastard man

this is blatantly untrue, and if V even had two braincells and better memory than a goldfish they'd know this--in the first flashback sequence where johnny and rogue nuke arasaka tower, thompson is on the comms as they ride the AV towards AHQ, questioning their plans and use of violence. 

which leaves me with some questions, like where the fuck is thompson, why does johnny keep lying about this, why doesn't johnny say almost anything about how you interact with the aldecaldo clan nonstop throughout the game when he himself may have been a member of the family for some time?? is he continuing to protect the nomad clan that saved his ass? we know that a lot of his flashbacks are unreliable at best, that johnny changes shit up as desired when presenting V with his memories.

in 2077, you can also find that there’s a remake of “badlands raid” in the shard “new release braindances” that is pretty much everywhere. that shard doesn’t add much, but does mention something along the lines of “many people don’t know the ending of the original” which probably means johnny punched thompson out for filming again, or something. 

my running theories: rogue ditched santiago and the aldecaldos with johnny and thompson to nuke arasaka tower, and when johnny died she was stuck looking for (heavily implied by johnny here:) corpo sellout ways to survive.

adam smasher obviously has something to do with this since johnny/rogue's vendetta against the guy isn't entirely clear beyond the smokescreen of "he killed johnny and he sucks". i have done 0 research into this though i'm tired of typing okay

i obviously cannot be certain i have found everything related to this in the game as i’m not even done with this playthrough where i’m trying to pay attention, but i hope this is fun for someone else to dig into. 

enjoy, fellow silverhand freaks

EDIT: additional findings

ALRIGHT I HAVE DONE MORE DIGGING AND I AM BACK WITH MORE NOMAD/JOHNNY FINDINGS. these ones are kind of a bummer but VERY interesting.

there’s a shard called “excerpts from a history of the nomads by bb pires” that goes into detail about how nomads came to be

there’s an interesting quote in it: It's hard to imagine a group less inclined to wandering than farmers, but in fact they were the ones who sparked the age of nomads. Natural catastrophes, crops ravaged by bioplagues, armed conflicts and martial law allowing corporations to speculate and privatize land - all this forced them into a life on the road.

when you ask johnny why he wants to take down arasaka, he begins by referencing this himself!!

it’s a little awkward to imagine a nomad V doesn’t also know what he’s referencing, but hey, V is the fool because we are as players and that’s only one life path... so sure.

johnny also has unique dialogue during this scene about a nomad origin V, telling them that he’s been trying to understand how V thinks, and came to the conclusion that “their family was a crutch” and essentially made them stupid because they always had a safety net (lmao johnny calling v privileged basically)

BUT this also may reference why johnny would find it confusing as hell that V doesn’t immediately share the views he does when nomads, in terms of values, seem to be more aligned with johnny than V is. but once again V is the fool for a reason and this is all my own speculation so YOU KNOW.

MORE IMPORTANTLY, at the end of chippin’ in, when you ask johnny what he meant by letting down his friends... santiago is named directly

i thought this was interesting since the only glimpse of their relationship that we get is seeing johnny meeting santiago via the alt flashback for the first time.

so now it’s obvious that while johnny and rogue were with the nomads their friendship developed, and johnny went on to disappoint santiago in some way by being his normal dickhead self

but HOW? how did he disappoint santiago? is santiago even still alive?? did smasher kill santiago and is this why rogue mentions during chippin’ in that she wants smasher to “settle a score” moreso than avenge johnny??

the only additional hints i have are from this shard, which you can find at the aldecaldos camp: “nomads at ground zero”

i’m just gonna transcribe here and bold for emphasis:

It was no secret that Night Corp offered generous pay and, in some cases, free cyberware and biomonitor upgrades to anyone willing to help clean up the crater of radioactive rubble at AHQ ground zero. Some firsthand accounts recall the incessant ticking of Geiger counters, like the loud buzz of cicadas in summer. In retrospect, we can only guess how many "crater cleaners" lost their lives to radiation sickness shortly thereafter. Both the city government and Night Corp have claimed casualties were kept to a minimum, while providing no official statistics to substantiate the claim. That being said, they have never been under pressure to release such figures. After all, most rescue, engineering, and rubble cleanup teams were not local Night Citizens, but nomads. Surprised you didn't know? Don't be. It is a fact many history courses tend to overlook. The city employed hundreds of nomad mercenaries, primarily from clans in Aldecaldo nation. These nomads were hungry for gainful work and the city needed experts who were not only experienced but brave enough to knowingly put their lives on the line - all so Arasaka could one day erect another tower in its place. But history is not without its sense of irony. These nomads, who so deliberately live outside our so-called "system," came to its very rescue. Not for the first time. And not for the last.

a main theme we find in this game is the idea that the system of corps and exploitation cannot be stopped by grandiose rebellious gestures--no amount of samurai songs, assassinating mayors, or even planting nukes in towers will change things. yet johnny, his friends and mercs at atlantis in the 2020s, including rogue, chose to rebel any way they could, thinking it better than not. johnny criticizes her lack of rebellious spirit CONSTANTLY in 2077.

but ultimately, johnny, trapped in mikoshi, didn’t get to see the outcome of what detonating the AHQ nukes did to night city’s fragile ecosystem. rogue, however, did--and likely watched their former allies, the aldecaldos, be forced to take dangerous work at AHQ’s ground zero (from lack of other opportunities as detailed in this shard), then die from radiation sickness throughout the following decades, all as a result of what she and johnny did to try and fight the system. and she also watched all the former mercenaries of atlantis be hunted down by arasaka.

so rogue sees firsthand what the cost of rebellion is and johnny doesn’t. and nomads, considered the most free of any of the factions we encounter in the game, are the cost.

[dialovers-translations]

DIABOLIK LOVERS VERSUS SONG Bloody Night Vol.Ⅴ Mini Drama “Kou VS Yuma”

Original title: 録り下ろしミニドラマ ｢コウVSユーマ｣

Source: Diabolik Lovers VERSUS SONG Bloody Night Vol.V Mini Drama

Audio: Here

Seiyuu: Kimura Ryouhei & Tatsuhisa Suzuki

Translator’s note: The other VERSUS mini drama tracks were between 20 & 25 minutes so when I opened the link and saw it was only 12 minutes, I immediately got worried that perhaps the track was incompletely. Fortunately, that was not the case and they just made this one shorter for some reason. I guess they ran out of ideas? :p It really does feel a little lackluster compared to say the Shuu VS Laito one where there was a lot of interesting tension between the two boys. Although the Mukami’s are on better terms with each other, so their dynamic is obviously different from default. 

→  LIKE MY TRANSLATIONS? SUPPORT ME ON KO-FI!

You walk up to the Mukami manor.

Yuma: So ya finally came, huh? Just how long did ya stay behind at school? 

You look around.

Yuma: Foolー I’m right over here.

You flinch, turning around.

Yuma: Come on...!

*Rustle rustle*

Yuma pins you down against the grass.

*Rustle*

Yuma: Heh...You really are hella slow. 

You seem confused. 

Yuma: Aah? ‘Why’, you ask? ーー This is more important right now. I’m thirsty...

He bites you.

*Sluuuurp*

Yuma: Haah...I really can’t get ‘nough of this...

You protest.

Yuma: Ugh, shut up! Ya should only focus on my fangs! More...Quench my thirst more...

*Sluuuurp*

*Rustle rustle*

Yuma: ーー Ugh!! Stop makin’ a damn ruckus! ...Oi, this side’s up next.

You start shaking.

Yuma: Pissin’ yer pants? Hehe...Guess that makes sense. I bet it’s scary ya can’t see what I’m doin’, huh? I’d love to mess ‘round with you a lil’...but I can’t hold back...

*Sluuuurp*

Yuma: Ah...Haah...Your blood is still of the best quality...It’s even more addictin’ than Sugar-chan...Have ya started feelin’ good, despite all those protests from earlier? Ya really are hopeless, aren’t ya? Hehehe...

You try and defend yourself.

Yuma: Hehe...Just give in to it completely (1). If ya do, I’m sure you’ll be able to feel even beーー

Kou: ...Aaah!! Yuma-kun’s having fun behind our backs!! (2)

Yuma: Why the fuck ya here, Kou!?

Kou walks up to them.

Kou: No fair, Yuma-kun! Trying to hog M-neko-chan all for yourself like that! Say, let me join in as well? You’ve already had plenty of fun, haven’t you?

Yuma: Che, we were just gettin’ to the good part so back off already!

Kou: Eeeh!? Aren’t you being kinda mean? M-neko-chan isn’t exclusively yours so I have the right to suck her blood as well!

*Rustle*

Kou: Besides~ I’m sure she’s yearning for my fangs as well, right? Hehehe~ 

He approaches you.

Kou: Isn’t that so, M-neko-chan?

You whimper in response.

Kou: Hmm~ I have no idea what you just said, but I can take that as an ‘okay’, right? Well, I would have done it even if you said ‘no’, of course~ Well then, without wasting any more time...

Yuma: Oi, wait!

Kou: Hm? ...What? You want to do it at the same time?

Yuma: Hell no! Get yer hands off what is mine!

Kou: Like I said, that’s not up to you to decide. M-neko-chan said she likes my fangs best, you know?

Yuma: Aaah!? No way in hell! ...Che, at least come up with a more decent lie.

Kou: It’s not a lie though~~

Yuma: ...!! Are ya makin’ fun of me!? 

*Rustle*

Yuma: Oi, Sow! Do ya seriously prefer hiーー

You use this as an opportunity to try and get away from them.

*Rustle rustle*

Yuma: ...!? Che...! ...Come on, this’ll work, right?

Kou: ...Now’s our chance! M-neko-chan, we’re making a run for it!

Kou grabs your hand and dashes off with you.

Yuma: ...Ah! Oi, hold it...! ...Fuck! ...Wait, I said!!! Oi!!

Yuma chases after the two of you.

*TIMESKIP*

Kou: ...Haah, haah...Aaah~ I’m beat...! I didn’t think he’d be that persistent, did you? Hehe~ 

You gasp for air after running. 

Kou: Ah...Are you okay? Your complexion is really pale...

You nod.

Kou: I see. Guess it’s fine then~ 

You blink in confusion.

Kou: Oh? Did you perhaps think I was actually worried about your health? Pfft~ No way! ...Although, I was just a tad bit worried Yuma-kun might have sucked a little too much, but of course, I’m only worried about your blood in that case. 

You frown.

Kou: Haha~ Did that hurt? But...Mmh~ I’m really digging that expression. 

*Rustle*

Kou: I’d love to see more...So don’t run away and let me have your blood? I’ll make sure to take my time to thoroughly savor you...

*Rustle*

Kou: I’ll start by latching onto this delicious-looking upper arm...~ ...Hm? I can’t take it off very well...

*Rustle rustle*

Kou: ...Ah, geezーー!!

*RIIIIIP*

Kou: ...Ah. It ripped. ...Oh well, your skin’s exposed now so this works, right? 

*Rustle rustle*

Kou: ...Oh? Does it tickle? Then how about this...~?

*Smooch*

Kou: Fufufu~ You were so shocked earlier but in the end, you love it when I do all of these things to you, don’t you? ...Come on, show me the best expression you’ve got...”

Kou bites you.

Kou: Mmh...

*Sluuuurp*

Kou: Hah...Haah...Aah~ It’s so sweet, it feels like I’m melting...~ Also...It’s so soft, I can’t stop...Mmh...

*Sluuuurp*

Kou: Mmh...Nn...Huh? ‘No’? I honestly don’t think I can control myself right now. Also, if you make too much of a fuss, Yuma-kun will find us, you know? Are you okay with that?

You shake your head.

Kou: Right? So just accept me...No, maybe you actually want Yuma-kun to find us, don’t you?

You deny it.

Kou: Haha~ You don’t need to deny it so desperately. In that case, shall I call him over...~?

Yuma arrives to the scene.

Yuma: Haah, haah...What was that ‘bout me?

Kou: Huh? ...Yuma-kun, amazing! Perfect timing!

Yuma: Aahn? ...Anyway, ya sure had some nerve earlier, settin’ me up like thaーー

Kou: ーー Stop! Instead, come over here! I said you came at the right time, no? 

Yuma: Che...What do ya want?

Yuma steps closer.

Kou: Come on, let’s show him...Your top-tier expression.

Kou bites you again.

Kou: Mmh...Nn...

*Sluuuurp*

Kou: Hah...

Yuma: Oi...Don’t tell me, ya showin’ off to me!?

Kou: ...Fufu~ Exactly! Mmh...

*Sluuuurp*

Kou: Ah...Hehe~ M-neko-chan is a next-level masochist after all...The second she realizes somebody is watching her...Haahn...

*Gulp*

Kou: ...Fufu~ See? She gets aroused like this~?

Yuma: Che...Fuck off.

Kou: M-neko-chan? Show Yuma-kun even more of those nice faces. 

Yuma: ...Shit!! If that’s the game ya wanna play...Oi, Sow! Don’t ya dare give Kou all of yer attention!

*Rustle*

Yuma: I don’t feel satisfied ‘cause a certain someone got in the way before we were done...

Yuma bites you as well.

*Sluuuurp*

Kou: Hehehe~ Now’s that more like it! In that case, me too...Mmh...

They both suck your blood at the same time.

*Sluuuurp*

Yuma: ...Mmh...Nnhーー! Keep still! One extra person barely makes any difference, right?

Kou: Hehe, now don’t be getting the wrong idea, M-neko-chan. You are in no position to talk back to us. Isn’t it obvious we’ll have you tag along until we’re tired of this?

Yuma: Hehehe...Exactly. 

You continue to protest.

Kou: Haha...I’m starting to get a little pissed off. I should probably seal those lips before they spout any more infuriating nonsense, huh?

Kou starts looking through his bag.

Kou: If I recall correctly, it should be in here...

*Rustle rustle*

Yuma: Haah? Whatcha gonna do with that handkerchief?

Kou: I’m gonna put it in her mouth? Just like this...~

*Rustle*

Kou: It’s a shame I won’t be able to hear those sweet noises you make, but it can’t be helped. This ensures I get to have your blood after all. Besides, it looks so erotic, I’m kind of digging it! I can’t make up my mind where I should bite you next~ Hehe~ It’s a great opportunity...So how about the lower back? M-neko-chan...I’ll thrust them right in, okay?

Kou bites you again.

Kou: Mmh...

*Sluuuurp*

Kou: Nn...Mmh...

*Sluuuurp*

*Gulp*

Kou: Ah...Haah...

Yuma: Hehe...Ya better not forget that Kou isn’t the only one here, ‘kay? 

Yuma bites you once more as well.

*Sluuuurp*

Kou: Mm...Come on! You can’t just focus on Yuma-kun! Look my way too!

*Rustle*

Kou: Okay? ...Take a good look. I’m going to give you an intense pain right now. I’ll make it so you can never forget about me again...

*Sluuuurp*

*Gulp*

Kou: Haahn...

*Sluuuurp*

Yuma: Seems like yer mind has gone blank. But...We’re not done yet. I’ll wake ya up again and again with these fangs...So brace yerself.

Kou: Fufu~ Remember this well. You can no longer escape from us Vampires’ fangs. Not ever, okay?

ーー THE END ーー

Translation notes

(1) Literally he tells her ‘to drop as far down as possible’. The Japanese word for ‘to fall’ is also used as a synonym for ‘to become tainted/corrupted’ at times. 

(2) 抜け駆け or ‘nuke-gake’ literally means that you get a headstart on someone. 

[sapphire-innit]

DRISTAAAAA TIMEEE

VOD: TommyInnit Speaks To Dream’s Sister AGAIN

(rp): Drista!! I love this chaotic child and am looking forward to seeing the children bully each other lmao. I especially love the mythos around Creative mode, and that the most benevolent god on the Dream SMP is just as likely to ban you as hand you a shulker box lol.

I do wonder how in character cc!Tommy is going to be able to stay during this stream: on one hand he’s a master at staying in character even during lh moments, and on the other Exile arc is some Dark Shit and Dristas like what, 14?? Overall I expect this to be one of the lighter streams, with a smattering of moments where we remember that, oh right, Tommy’s pretty actively suicidal at this point and he sees this as one of his last hurrahs.

Speaking of our boy Tommy: it's very clear we are getting closer and closer to the infamous pillar. He switches rapidly between Fight and Fawn reflexes and has mostly internalized Dream’s treatment and conditions at this point. The one stand out moment being him calling out Dream killing Mexican Dream last stream, and pointing out he was changing his story even when Dream tried to lie and say he died of “a drug overdose [...] or natural causes”. I’m curious if Tommy is going to bring it up again, and even more curious if he eventually believes Dream about it; something to watch out for, for sure. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that this moment of rebellion happened right after he had someone both stand up for him and spend time with him that wasn’t actively hostile or going to end (supposedly, at least by intention)

Hey we didn’t start off drowning for once!! cc!Tommy was also singing, though that could have been mostly out of character as well. Still, remarkably in a better mood, he even mentions having an appetite! You love to see it, and it's clearly because he’s looking forward to Drista’s visit

He’s building a log tower and on one hand, Tommy building Towers is a natural state of being, and on the other…. I know the pillar is coming and I am scared

A mention of the Anti-Dream hole… I still worry about when exactly and how Dream is going to find it. Still, I’m glad it exists, both for Tommy having a space for things important to him, as well as what it represents about his mental state re:not giving over completely to Dream

DRISTA!!!! LOL she was already online we didn't even see her join LOL. CHAOS GREMLIN she just flew over in creative mode and started wrecking shit, as is her right lmaoooo

“You massive jer--, (quieter) whats a nicer way…, YOU MASSIVE DICKHEAD” oh, Tommy..

I like how he tries to punch her even when shes CLEARLY IN CREATIVE MODE ADSADASD

The violence inherent in fourteen year olds,,,, adsfsadfsdfds

I hate this conversation why is this the conversation asdffdsfsd TEENAGERS

DREAM YOUR NOT EVEN A TEENAGER WHY ARE YOU FOLLOWING THE SAME LOGIC

Well SHE can destroy the obsidian asdfsdfds She just Spleefs

“What would Dream do” Probably worse lets be honest

Is he actually gonna go back to L’manburg?? I don’t believe it but I also want :(

Again with the stabbing

AND DOWN HE GOEEEESSSS

“I have the fork, but I'm also killing you” afsafsdfdsf Tommy why are you wearing your good shit omg

Lol cc!Dream trying to defend his character for mocking Tommy’s accent adsfsdfds “I would NEVER” in the totally not believable tone lmaoooo

DID SHE REALLY GO AT HIM WITH A FORK I'M FUCKING DYING DSAFDADSFDS

“I will take it from you and I’ll kill him”... I have so many thoughts about how this works in lore. Is Drista possessing Dream? He can kick her out clearly, but she still has God Powers…

Lol and now SHES mocking his accent lmaoooo (... is it bad she sounded pretty close to me? lol)

Adsfdsfswd casual chaos Drista just broke the Nether Portal

Asking Drista to stop destroying things is a big ask to be honest lmaoo. Also she seems to be at least somewhat informed that ‘Dream is not supposed to be nice to Tommy’ or at least seemed hesitant to do /weather clear

GOD THE LAVA BUCKETS AND THE POTION OF HARMING adsfsdfsdf

“Tommy [beheaded him] actually… and killed Mexican Dream” Dream you motherfucker

“How to Sex 3” THE PANIK!!!!!! From Both cc!Dream and Tommy!!! This server is Not Child Friendly lol (Doesn’t…. That not even include sex things…. afasfsd)

Honestly I can’t stop smiling this is so wholesome somehow even with all the cursing and violence

Pigstep IS a bop, Tommy is right

“Just let him, just let him this one time” :(

“Tommy I still have the Fork” Drista totally willing to stab her brother to visit L’manburg

HE TOOK THE FORK ASDASDAS

Yes, closing your eyes will totally protect you from Forks lol

“I don’t need school, I dropped out” Is this Lore Crumbs, is this Lore

HEYYYY ITS THE BEDROCK, the one piece of bedrock he has lol, I think he still has that in current day right?

Drista is writing her name in BEDROCK adsfsdfds “I’m not going to be able to get rid of that actually” “That's the Point”

LOL SHe also recognized the burrito as from Mos lmaooo

Somehow “I really want to go to the other place.. I don’t know why he won’t let you” hit hard… it was def ooc, and she doesn’t have the full context, but still… its just someone else wanting and asking for Tommy to be able see L’manburg…

Afsdfsd the Small Gasp when she spleefs herself omgg

HES THERE!!! HES THERE!!!!!! L’MANBURG!!!!!!

Punz!!! WHY!!!! Were you there bc Drista might let Tommy through, was this a safeguard for the LORE. Also he’s currently working for Dream directly right, as a merc?

Drista trying to save Tommy!!!! Punz why are you winning a fight with someone in creative adfsadfsd He’s too good lol

They have negotiated a visit… I’m so emotional I wasn’t expecting this…. No one told me we got a real L’manburg visit !

BIG Q SHES FOURTEEN!!! Omg they didn’t tell him it was Drista. BIG Q!!! BIG Q DON’T SELL HER DRUGS

“He was Naked” good for you Drista, good for you. There’s something so hilarious about Drista just stabbing Quackity over and over again cause she’s uncomfortable lol (as is her right)

LOL THE FINAL KILL WITH MAGIC WHEN HE’S ALREADY DROWNING IM

Wha --- what video was it????? What is this Tommy picture on the Technoganda???

….”are you sure I’m allowed here” Dream’s conditioning is strong :(

“At many minute I could get mugged” To be Fair Tommy, that was true before

Did Tommy just suggest spawning in a Wither asdfsdfds

DRISTA DOG ARMY!!!! Aww and Tommy has one too~

THE BENCH!! THE HOUSE!!! Aaaaaaaaa He’s sitting on the bench nature is HEALING

AAAAAAAA A BLAZE!!!! Pfffft

…. Who destroyed the front of Tommys house?

,,,,Drista what are you doing with that soULSAND

“OK we'll turn on him” adsfsdfsd

OH HEY TECHNO!!! Lol “Oh god he meant me” fucking mood big man

……. Tubbo hallucination……… fuck

LOL HE COMBAT LOGGED “YOU CALL THAT COMBAT” I'M

To be fair, logging against a /kill is probably the only way to get away lmao

…...F

“Getting thrown off a cliff is literally how Theseus died!!” lol its also hilarious to me that Tommy def does not remember being called that. Personally I don't think it fits him super well anyway, but I do like it as something Techno calls Tommy, that shows how much he misjudges Tommy's character and intentions. No heroes here, just a kid trying to do good by their friends and what they care about

Techno actually looking up how to kill someone in creative mode

…. :( I just want my actual clingyduo content this is meeeeannn

OH HEY TECHNO …. You fucker he would and it would be HILARIOUS (get mad if Drista opped Techno that is lol)

….

….

IS THIS WHY THEY’RE BEDROCK BROS????? BECAUSE THEY BOTH HAVE DRISTA BEDROCK??????????????????????????

HOW DID I NOT KNOW THIS ???

LOL TRUE DUO SUPREMACY TUBBO’S GOT TECHNO'S BEDROCK

Oh F Techno got him with the Obliterator lmaoooo

“I have 114 levels PLEASE” asdfdasfsdf

LOL Tubbo with the TNT there's our nuke boy, I'll take my crumbs where I can get them

THE SHULKER HOLY SHIT

“Don't let someone get it!!”” ADSFDSAFSDFDS they all tuRN CC REAL QUICK WHEN THE SHULKER BOXES COME OUT

Awesamdudes like: MORE PLEASE AFDASFDSF

Techno immediately snitching about Elytra and dRISTA GETTING THE ACHIEVEMENT

EVERYONE SNITCHING IN CHAT I'M!!!! DREAMS REACTION ASDFSDFDSF

Drista being the chaotic giver of illegal gifts is so fucking good I'M THRIVING

THE RUN ON PUNZ !!!! omg

Also can we just take a minute to appreciate Tommy being allowed around people <3 <3 This is so wholesome and good and chaotic as all hell

“I thought I was Tom Cruz for like a whole week” ...TOMMY??

LOL SHE BANNED TECHNO OMG

Dristas on a banning Rampage afsdfsdf

BAN GOGGY OMGGG

Omg shes actually making a wITHER DASDASDFAS

Oh no poor Tubbo I didn’t know he was liVE

319k viewers jeezus

Awwwww Techno hyping up Wilbur's song :) that's so sweet actually

…………….Fuck you Dream :( saw the chance to Twist the Knife in c! And TOOK IT

LOL THE FUCKING FORK IS THE BEST BIT LOLLLL

Lol ironically the Bedrock bros song is the oNE COPYRIGHTED ONE, god why did Minecraft ever copyright Pigstep what a shit move honestlyyy

Pigstep fucking goING TO TECHNO LOLLLLLL “this is the most powerful item on the server since it DMCA’s people”

LOL PUNZ TRYING TO STEAL ANOTHER SHULKER

Poor Sam he actually has to BUILD give this man a SHULKER

Lol Everyone wants a shulker so much

….aww he tried to toss the pigstep disc lmaooo DRISTAS LITERALLY HOLDING IT Scaaaaaammmmed

Drista “I NEED IT ON HAND” So committed to violence !!!

The fucking creepers on the way out omg fuckign PERFECT

LOL TOMMY WASN’T READY FOR THE TURN AROUND ON CURSING LMAO You can tell he's always been the youngest who people aren't sure how much they can curse around lmao He's so soft honestly he talks such a big game and then CRUMBLES when called on it lol

Asfdsfs she fell through the same hole again afsdfsdfsd

Drista has been introduced to a Weapon and she’s gotten ATTACHED lmaooo

Wait HOLD THE PHONE Dream has multiple sisters??? Lol

“Yeah I like Shit” Dream: “whAT???”

Bye Drista it’s been nice!!! I hope she had a good time, she seems like a good kid (who is definitely not a content creator lol though she keeps up admirably)

Drista’s one of the few people who can make Tommy speechless lmaooo he looks actually shocked lol

Also first mention of GhostInnit…. cc!Tommy…..

Keep preparing…. Was his original plan to rush Dream even if (maybe especially if…) he died? Fuck man

Also holy shit was this stream right before Quackitys? ? amazing

This was honestly such a BLAST and a really good time, and I can see why its viewed as one of the few breaks we get during Exile :) I feel so refreshed and it was so so nice to have Tommy hanging out in L’manburg having fun with his friends (even if Tubbo was stuck being a Hallucination and Also Banned lol) No deeper insight, I just haven’t stopped smiling for an hour and a half <3

[isa-ghost]

JSE Renaissance Week Day 1

Started by @rogue-of-broken-time

Day 1 (June 25th): Interaction day. Let at least one person in the community know how much you appreciate them being here. Got any fun ask games to send around? Now’s the time. Even better if they’re JSE-related

*Stands upon my table of Fuckery with a big fucking megaphone*

YOU.

YOU READING THIS.

If you follow me?? And have?? For a while?? ESPECIALLY since 2017-2018??

This post is for YOU.

I was so insanely out of the loop when I was dragged into Hell on December 15th, 2017 aka fucking OVERNIGHT WATCH and I had NO PLANS to blow the fuck up somehow or anything. I was shocked my posts were even getting notes because I had no followers and I was mostly yelling incoherently while rifling through other blogs to figure out what the HAP was fuckening.

I’d previously only known Say Goodbye & KJSE existed. I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW ANTI HIJACKED PAX EAST, I THOUGHT THAT RECYCLED FOOTAGE/AUDIO WAS NEW, for some reason not connecting the dots that Sean didn’t have messy wavy dead grass lookin ass hair, he was freshly back to coffee bean. We’d barely even started yelling about how the egos would look with brown hair.

A special double thanks to Rogue, @fear-is-nameless, @huffletrax and a blog no longer existing for somehow coming across my dash for me to latch onto for Coherent, Aware Screaming since I was lost as hell and only knew the pretty glitch man was causing problems on purpose.

Without you guys, I’d never have pieced together things I did that night or anytime after, met my current best friends (besides you guys ;D) from our infamous group- Bunker #88720, or had so many more amazing people like @lum1natriix, @turquoisemagpie, @d-structive and so many other people I admire the absolute hell out of cross my dash and instantly steal a follow. Among other things. Overall, you guys completely curated my experience as a JSEC newborn and I am so insanely nostalgic for those times so often. Thank you guys, and any blog I followed sometime after that for exposing me to more awesome people, artists, gif creators/editors, writers, memelords and more. :) <3 You were all the best domino effect I could’ve asked for. Those of us who are mutuals, I’m so unbelievably happy you’re still here both in the community And on my blog.

And to everyone reading this who didn’t awaken my ass with Knowledge(tm) or theory fuel, oh my god why the fuck are you here. /lh j

Thank you guys for seeing something in me worth nuking your dash in absolute fucking chaos for. Whether you came for theories, my ego AUs, headcanons, little writing blurbs I occasionally shockingly fart out, the art I used to semi-frequently post, or my infamous unholy shitposts like the classic Anti/Cryptic Sean Insult List, every one of you- especially the ones who have been here since 2018 -have been a genuine confidence boost for me regardless of the content my weird stupid ass lured you into following me for.

New hyperfixations or not, I’m still here in the JSEC. I still love you guys, will make JSE content, and haven’t lost interest at all. And even if I were to, I’d still stick to you guys and appreciate anyone who stuck around this insanity pit of a blog.

This community is home. <3

[fireemblems24]

Verdant Wind: Chapter 17

First off, it's weird only doing two routes this time, since SS skips over this chapter, and I'm not going back to CF until all the final chapters are ready.

Below's all my thoughts about VW's take on Gronder Field. 😭I was not ready. OMG. How could you do this to me?

Pre-Battle:

Oh dear, God, no, Hilda. Is this Fog of War?

I picked "I'm worried" for Byleth, but it's not for the reasons Claude thinks. It's because I know Dimitri's coming (it's clearly setting up Battle of Eagle and Lion Round 2), and I'm betting he's not doing so hot.

Oh, shit, yep, here he is. I'm not ready for this guys.

It wouldn't make sense to "kill" Dimitri, just to bring him back and kill him for real a second later though.

I'm clinging to that. But I still don't feel good.

It is kind of pathetic that Dimitri has a more interesting plot in VW than Claude so far.

Oh, crap, everyone's here. Mercedes, Dedue, and Bernie. Do I have to kill them? I'm going to avoid killing whoever I can. So much for "kill 'em all - I am pathetic. Except Hubert lol. I love the guy, but I don't feel bad taking him out.

OK - but like Dedue and Mercie? They are too precious to have fun with "kill em all." And Bernie was so sweet after Jeralt's death that I feel bad.

At the same time . . . Killing them all . . . could be fun.

But Dedue and Mercie 😭And then I feel bad excluding Bernie.

I wonder if my dancer!Felix can fight Dimitri. I'll make sure Claude fights both lords, but I'm curious to see if Felix and Dimitri get unique dialogue.

What if I said - I don't want to defeat Dimitri - but the game said - defeat all enemy commanders 😭

Ohh - cut scene! God, it's been forever.

Edelgard fire bombing everyone. Dimitri getting revenge for the dead. Nothing's changed.

Seriously, Edelgard? She's like "we were classmates, but not today" and looks so sad. Like, girl, you caused all this.

I'm kind of annoyed at how she always feels so sorry for herself, not going to lie. I don't mind the characterization, but just it's always so focused on her and never her victims. But I feel this is my annoyance with CF bleeding through.

Which makes me wonder how I'd feel about her if I played this game one route after the next.

"Kill every last one of them!" - Chris Hackeny is a gem.

Imagine how shocking that is if you didn't play AM. I'd probably quit right there and see wtf happened, since all the Kingdom drama + Dimitri's Disney death + mysterious reappearance with a totally new attitude and sexy eyepatch would just be too much.

I feel so bad for Claude though. I've spent more time talking about Edelgard and Dimitri than him. But they both get such interesting in-character stuff, and he's like "man this class reunion sucks." Only Byleth got less stuff.

OK - Edelgard got some points back with her chaotic warfare and smarts trying to block the Kingdom and Alliance.

Battle Thoughts:

I've got a million fliers on this team, and Bernie's range is just too long. I think I'm going to just have to kill her.

Eh, whatever. Let's kill them all.

Hubert doesn't think much of my strategy.

Dimitri's not holding back here. It makes it really clear how far he's actually come in AM seeing him in VW like this.

Lysithea nuked Dedue and he . . . retreated? Does Dedue get to live? 😭😭😭

Dimitri's "Shut up and retreat. You must live, Dedue." after Dedue insists on fighting 😭😭😭Again - even at his absolute worst, Dimitri always gives Dedue special treatment.

HOLY SHIT - Edelgard just lit Bernie on fire. Oh my God. Guess that means I'm killing her :(

LAMO - Claude crit Edelgard. Kinda deserves it after that.

Now to have him (and Felix) fight Dimitri. If they can. Apparently Dimitri can one-shot Ignatz (that was one use of Divine Pulse).

Can anybody explain why Dimitri gets the "effective against" warning against literally every unit??

It's too bad Dimitri and Claude don't just team up. The situation feels kinda forced, but it makes sense given Dimitri's state of mind. Still feels like the game is just forcing "no two lords for you!"

WTF is this? Dimitri's even got effectiveness against an infantry dancer.

So Dimitri told Felix he's not worthy and to get out of his sight. Then Felix crit Dimitri and told HIM to get out of HIS sight. No unique dialogue though. 😭😭

OK guys, I spared Mercie. I . . . just couldn't. Dedue got nuked but retreated? And Bernie got set on fire AND had a droppable Brave Bow. Sorry.

So . . . Did Dimitri retreat or die?

Post Battle Thoughts:

Oh, shit. Hilda's "I saw him" doesn't sound good.

Well that sucks.

😭😭😭😭😭😭

They really brought Dimitri back to life, only to kill him off two seconds later. It might be my Dimitri bias coming through, but that seems . . . kinda pointless tbh.

At least he's getting sympathetic treatment 😭😭😭

Dedue lived and he's all alone 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Why is it that Kingdom characters seem like they're getting a better story than poor Claude?

Lysithea's story is more interesting than Claude's 😭😭😭 Poor girl had it rough. Fuck the Empire.

Aww, Lorenz is the first one who said he'd follow Claude.

I love how on VW, Leonie and Raphael realize that the Empire's actions are a threat to the things they want to protect, but in CF they'll just toss that all into the wind because professor power.

Aww, Marianne's "I'll fight too." 😊😊😊I needed that after the drama with Dimitri and Dedue.

Why do we never get to see Holst??

Oh - so that's why Lysithea held off on her A-Support. It was waiting for that stuff with the mages.

Judith is so hot. I'm still mad I can't use her in battle.

All I need to take Fort Merceus is Dimitri - oh wait.

Is this the best the game could come up with for Claude's "schemes?" They dress up as Imperial soldiers and just walk in?

VW's tone feels too lighthearted for this game (esp after Dimitri 😭😭😭) , but at the same time it's a nice breather.

[timep3tals]

You asked for short iron dad drabbles, so heres an idea for one! During a mission Peter and Tony's suits are wrecked (EMP or something of your choice) before they defeat their opponent. Tony and Peter have to rely solely on Peter's spider strength and senses to survive.

thank you for the ask! sorry it took me a small ETERNITY to write it out, but... it’s finally done! fair warning for LANGUAGE tony has a potty mouth whoops. (also i actually rly like this one so i hope you guys do, too.)

Tony had felt helpless before.

He had felt helpless when Pepper fell to her doom feet away from Tony’s outstretched hand. He had felt helpless when Rhodey came crashing down to Earth, too far to reach. He had felt helpless when he received a call that his plane had crashed and the kid had been on the damn plane when it went down.

Always too far; never fast enough. Tony built suits for speed, but he could never seem to catch up to tragedy.

He had felt helpless when he sent a nuke out into the frozen depths of space and stared at what Tony knew would one day spell their doom.

(It didn’t end up being their doom; they were down a few faces in the compound, but the world survived, and the threat was finally, finally gone. The demons that lingered in his closet had been killed, and he could rest. Tony wasn’t sure he knew how to rest.)

None of that seemed to compare to this moment. Peter was inching ahead of him, silent save for the occasional hiss of air in and out of his lungs that barely reached Tony’s ears. The kid was on high alert, the hair on his arms visibly raised as they snuck through the compound where they were being held.

They’d been hit with a fucking EMP, and a pretty jacked up one at that, because it had managed to fry Tony’s suits. FRIDAY had sputtered out of commission, barely managing to eject his ass out into the open air before the suit cratered the Earth and Peter had launched himself off the ground through sheer fucking force to catch him before he plummeted. 

These morons surrounded him and Tony was seething, teeth grit as they pointed guns at his kid, and he didn’t even get the opportunity to blast their faces in because his damn suit was out of commission. He was stubbornly useless as Peter gave into their demands to back off and wished looks could kill because then at least these assholes would drop dead from his glares.

It wasn’t as though they were entirely left out in the cold, though. Sure, Peter’s suit was also trashed and they couldn’t call for help, but the team knew where they were. Tony had long since sent out a distress signal, but it was just a waiting game until the others arrived, held up by the front lines of the fighters.

And, until then, they could rely on Peter’s spider-ness to remove the enemy’s bargaining chip. Once they’d turned enough eyes (and guns) off them, Peter had launched himself forward, taking down the enemies at a speed that was dizzying to watch.

They didn’t have time to scream before they were unconscious on the cold floor.

Tony would be impressed if he wasn’t too busy fighting back frustrated word-vomits.

Peter had grown so much, but it should be Tony getting them out of this situation. A fucking adult at least, not a seventeen year old who had too much to do with life than worry about getting Tony’s useless ass out of yet another prison.

“Stop,” Peter hissed, suddenly, pressing Tony back against the wall without even looking back. His arm was like steel and Tony grit his teeth so hard his ears rang. “There’s two ahead. I’m gonna take them out.”

“Careful, kid,” he reminded him, though it was pointless. Peter was already moving forward, crawling up onto the ceiling. Tony slammed his head back against the wall when he heard the sound of a muffled fight, relishing in the swirl of his eyes, before Peter reappeared and waved him on.

The cycle repeated and by the time the sun touched their skin, Tony was fighting a scream that was tearing his throat raw. Peter had done fucking fantastic, of course he had, Tony had expected no less, but it was so... so...

“There are the others,” Peter said, pointing towards the horizon where the others were jogging towards them, late, too goddamn late. What was the point of having backup if Peter ended up having to do all the work anyway? “Hey! Over here!”

“About time,” Tony snapped when the others got within range. Natasha smiled, small and wry, and he wanted to rip it off her face. Doesn’t she get it? “Thanks for coming so fast! Really, great help.”

“Mr. Stark,” Peter grumbled at his sharp tone. Tony ignored him. Teenagers didn’t get to be the ones lecturing him on his attitude.

He’ll be angry and bitter and annoyed and useless all he wants, thank you very much.

“Should’ve watched out for an EMP, if you’re gonna be so pissy about our response time when we’re fighting a few hundred guys,” Natasha said. “The hell crawled up your ass and died?”

“God, I fucking wonder. Maybe the fact the kid had to get us out, while I did fuckall.” Tony ran a frustrated, shaking hand through his hair and looked to the sky. One... two... three... counting was fuckin’ boring, and he still wanted to scream. “The Quinjet here already? Great, I’m leaving. Come on, kid, the others will take care of the cleanup.”

Peter hurried to follow when Tony took off, sending worried glances that burned on Tony’s skin.

“Kid, look,” he said, determinedly not looking at said kid, unable to see the damn understanding or pity or whatever the fuck was on Peter’s face. He just couldn’t see it. It would cause the mass of emotions all tangled up in his chest like a wildfire to explode, and he couldn’t.

Not until he was alone and buried in the smell of motor oil, hidden in the recesses of his workshop.

“You did good. Fuckin’ great. I just hated being the one having to rely on you. I’m the one supposed to be taking care of you, not the other way around, and it just. Really pisses me off that I was so useless today.”

Peter was quiet, then, “That’s a bunch of horseshit, Mr. Stark.”

“Excuse me?”

Tony managed a baffled glance at Peter, who shrugged.

“I mean, like, we’re both heroes. You rely on the Avengers. Why is it so bad to rely on me sometimes, too? Don’t you think I’m ever frustrated by how much you help me out? I want to protect people, and that includes you. So just shut up and take my help sometimes. It wasn’t even that dangerous today.”

Fuck, this kid. Tony turned away, biting viciously on his cheek to hide the smile that erupted across his face, unbidden. Damn this little asshole for making him feel better. Why couldn’t he just let Tony sulk?

“Yeah, yeah, rub it in my face kid. You’re so very talented with your sticky hands.”

“Mr. Stark, that sounds disgusting.”

“Jesus, I didn’t mean it like that. Where the hell is your head?”

Peter just laughed.

Tag List @keep-a-bucket-full-of-stars @just-the-daydreamer @serendipity--goddess @tony-wheres-my-supersuit @baloobird @fourdaysofrain @swagfictonreadingnerd  @josywbu @as-clear-as-crystal @an-adventureland @hannah-emily-zhang @spideynamu @spideygirl2003 @fleur-dw @stark-genius @ifyoucanreadmymindthenimsorry @rain-brown @supernoetta @aelinasardothien @jaedray @snazzy-jas-z-is-a-fan-of @drowned-in-books @ditzy-daydreamer1 @emsxworld @starkfridays @avenging-criminal-bones @myyszka @stark-tony @ardenskyedarcy221b @emmaelsa0000 @you-get-killed-walk-it-off @littlemissagrafina @joyful-soul-collector @hold-our-destiny @bringitonvoldie (Lmk if you want to be added/removed! Sorry if yours doesn’t work idk man.)

[mythrilhusk]

Korosensei Never Dies - Chapter 6

Words - 1967 Ao3 Version Chapter 5 (last) Chapter 7 (Next)

AN: Just wanted to note (although it’s already in tags) that there are no ships in this story. The characters may be affectionate with each other, but it’s all platonic. 

====

Exams are the worst part of school, but the end of the first term approaches fast. Tommy determines he will not fail. Philza has promised to teach them how to fight, and by the ever-loving stars, Tommy wants to show off his mad skillz. 

He's so intent on getting fighting lessons that he's dragged his friends into group study sessions. Wilbur insists on leading said sessions, and somehow the schoolwork gets entwined with role-playing battles with fiercesome monsters. 

"The answer is forty-two!! I pull out a bazooka and blast everything to smithereens!" Tubbo cackles. "Nothing shall stand in the way of world domination." 

"Tubbo," Wilbur sighs for the fortieth time. "That would kill all of your teammates." 

"Do I care?" Tubbo grins innocently. "Less competition, big man!" 

"I lay down and die." Ranboo says drily, leaning against the wall with his arm around Tubbo's shoulders. 

"Not you, Ranboo, you're going to be my puppet queen. Every world-dominating super-villain needs a puppet queen." Tubbo says, quite matter-of-fact.

Tommy scrawls messily on his workbook, determined to complete the next answer first and get a turn. "Ha! Fucking x equals twenty-nine!" He crows. "I shoot my nets at Tubbo and capture him!!" 

"Stand-off." Wilbur says with a grin. "Who wrote Frankenstein?" 

"Some woman with a boring name." Tommy retorts. 

"Anne Rice!" Tubbo cries. 

"Tommy, you got the closer answer. It was Mary Shelley." 

"Alright, I win, and I say 'Hahaha, you fucking imbecile, you are no match for me!' and then I drag them to jail." 

"I completed my worksheet, Wilbur." Eret pipes up. Wilbur takes it, then nods for Eret to complete his bonus action. "I stab Tommy and release Tubbo, saying, 'The world is yours for the taking, but allow me to oversee a portion of it.' and then I kneel and plant my sword in the dust." 

"Oh! Oh!" Tubbo waves his worksheet in the air. "Ranboo, stab him for me!" 

"As you wish." Ranboo sighs with a wicked grin. Eret protests weakly in the background. 

"Ranboo, you need to answer a question correctly, first." Wilbur steeples his fingers. "Or else there will be penalties." 

"I, uh, I think I got this one correct." Ranboo shows his study sheet to Wilbur, who nods curtly. 

"Fine, go ahead." 

Ranboo turns to Eret and says in a dark tone, "You betrayed your friend. I can't trust you, Eret." Then he turns to Wilbur, "I run him through with my dagger." 

"Eret, you're now a ghost." Wilbur shuffles through his game notes. 

"Aw, man. Can I haunt anyone?" 

"Yes."

"I haunt Ranboo to remind him of his crimes." 

"Aw, dang, another voice." Ranboo groans playfully. 

"Whaddya mean, another??" Tubbo cries. "Am I being replaced, Ranboo??" 

"You- you are the voice." Ranboo laughs nervously. "Even when you're dead, I'll still hear you, shouting at me to not kill the bees." 

"You better not. I worked hard to cultivate our apiary." 

"I won't, I won't." 

Tommy finishes his worksheet, ignoring the chatter of the others. "Ha!" He turns it into a paper plane and throws it to Wilbur. "I want twelve actions now!" 

"Okay, Tommy." Wilbur replies with a sly smile. The others protest, but Tommy has Wilbur wrapped around his little finger, so they won't be winning this battle. 

"But! I want to split them up between us, because I'm a fucking nice person who loves women." 

"Go ahead." 

"My first action as King de facto of the world is to declare peace between the Moon and Mars." 

"Wait, wait, you're king?? Eret, you didn't even kill him properly!!" Tubbo throws up his hands. "Ranboo, kill Tommy for me." 

"Hypothetically, what if I didn't?" 

"Ranboo. Are you betraying me??" 

"No, no, I said hypothetically." 

"Then, hypothetically, I would nuke your entire homeland and make you watch as I killed your family before your very eyes." 

"Oh! Oh, no." 

"And then I would torture you to death." 

"Oh, man. That would not be good." 

"So are you going to betray me?" 

"Apparently not." 

"Aw, man. I wanted to torture somebody." Tubbo sighs. 

Ranboo gives Tommy a look that says 'help me'. 

"You both lost your turns for talking too long." Wilbur decides. "Tommy and Eret, you both have an extra turn." 

"I turn corporeal using necromancy, and I use Tubbo's soul as the energy source, draining him of life." Eret says, his cheerful eyes belying his dark tone. 

"No! Ranboo, avenge meeeee!!" Tubbo cries melodramatically to the heavens. 

"Oh no! I'll avenge you!!" 

"I kill Ranboo." Tommy cackles at the horrified look on Ranboo's face. 

"Oh, that's not good." 

"How do you kill him, Tommy?" Wilbur asks. 

"I stab the bastard through the fucking eyes." 

"Oh. Man. That sounds painful." Ranboo winces.

"It is. You're screaming like a fucking bitch." 

"Am I? Oh dang, that's not fun. Am I a ghost now?" 

"Ghostboo." Tubbo laughs. "You're now Ghostboo." 

"You're Toast, you don't get to mock my name." 

Tommy frowns. "What's my ghost name?"

"Ghommy." Ranboo laughs. "Eret is Gheret." 

"Tommy, you think we're ready for the exams?" Wilbur gathers the papers scattered across the floor.  

"Fuck yeah, we are. We'll crush those bastards to dust. We'll get the highest grades of anybody in the entire school!"

++++

"What do you mean, you can't transfer me?? My grades are the worst they've ever been in years!!" Jack cries, stomping his foot on the polished wood floor of the principal's office. 

"I'm sorry, duckie, but I can't let anyone transfer between classes this year." Puffy-- rumored to be a pirate in a past life and therefore always called Captain-- frowns as she flicks through Jack's portfolio. "Why did you want to be transferred, anyway?" 

"No reason." Jack grumbles, then stomps out of the office, slamming the door behind himself. 

"How'd it go?" Niki hops down from one of the pillars. 

"Terribly. Those bastards in 3-E must've told Captain Puffy to not let anyone in. They're probably planning to take over the world now, using Techno as bait!" Jack cries, his eyes burning with furious tears. 

"That's awful!" Niki wails. "What will we do?" 

"What do heroes do to villains? We bomb them." 

"Bomb them?" 

"I don't know how yet." Jack grins, filled with burning rage. "But we'll think of something." 

"I know a man." Niki says decisively. "He'll get us supplies. If they really are planning to end the world, we need to stop them." 

++++

Exams roll around, and 3-E joins the the main school buildings for the tests. Quackity and Sapnap both leap on and hug Karl Jacobs. Tommy strides through the testing auditorium like he owns the place, with Wilbur glaring at everyone and Tubbo whetting his dagger with a placid smile. 

Fundy watches the chaos from the sidelines, chewing on caramel taffy and bubblegum at the same time. He doesn't recognize the quiet boy huddled in a corner and writing. Before he can creep over and look at the boy's words, Eret accosts him. "Hey, man." 

"Oh, hey!" Fundy grins and hugs his friend. "What've you been up to?" 

"Oh, just trying to stop the world from ending and make a profit in the process, you know, the usual." 

"Right, right. What's up with that, anyway? This guy, Technoblade? He must be really hard to kill if nobody's done it yet." 

"We have till the year ends." Eret says gravely. 

"Right. But why hasn't anybody, I don't know, tried to get in on the action?" 

"The government is supposed to be keeping his location a secret." Eret adjusts his sunglasses. 

"Weird." Fundy pops a bubble between his lips. 

"Indeed. I know there must be a weakness. But I'm not sure what it is."

"Maybe it's something like technical immortality! Maybe he can only be killed if he lets it happen!" Fundy theorizes, chewing more intensely. 

Eret grimaces. "Perhaps. Threatening his friend, Philza, directly is out of the question. But perhaps we can get the kill switch from the president." 

"Woah, woah, back up!" Fundy laughs. "There's already a kill switch in his friend and the prezz hasn't thought to use that??" 

"Well, he's a hostage, but- oh." 

"Exactly!! If the prezz actually wanted him dead, all they'd have to do is threaten to kill this Philza dude if Techno doesn't let himself be killed!" Fundy blows another bubble and pops it with his teeth. "Damn, I'm good." 

"That's assuming Technoblade would die if he allowed it. What if he can't?" Eret muses. 

"He has to have some weakness. How was he even created??" 

"I- I don't know." 

"The only way a mutant like that could be created is through Human intervention, aka a laboratory and scientists!!" Fundy claps his hands together excitedly. "But why would scientists create a creature who can destroy the world?? Unless he can't, and this is all just a damn test." 

"Hmm." Eret doesn't sound convinced. 

"So, they're trying to develop immortality, and they're testing it on Technoblade-"

"Why him?" Eret asks. "And if it is a test, why here, with a bunch of students?"

"He got loose before the tests could be finalized, and they're trying to contain him again!" Fundy starts pacing. "He was a terrorist, yeah? I remember him in the news. The Acolyte." 

"Blood for the blood god." Eret reminisces, paling. "That's right." 

"He only ever went after important government figures! But, five years ago, he disappeared, and nobody ever heard from him again. Until now..." Fundy grins wildly. "This is amazing, I can't believe I get front row seats to a conspiracy!" 

"Wait." Eret groans. "He had a partner." 

"Oh! He did?" 

"Technoblade was the Acolyte. But his partner was the Angel. What if that was-" 

"Philza!!" Fundy cries. "Oh god, we have both of the most deadly international terrorists in my school!! Why couldn't I have worn better clothes??" 

"I don't think that should be our main concern." Eret steeples his fingers. "I think we should worry more about what they're planning to do." 

"I'm going to talk to Captain Puffy." Fundy decides. "Come with me?" 

"I'll pass. Good luck." 

"I've got the best luck in the world." Fundy crows and skips off. He glances back once, briefly, only to see Eret watching him with an unreadable expression. 

++++

Tipsy, Schlatt lounges on one of the pristine metal tables. In the background, HBomb sweeps up the shards of a broken whiskey bottle, the remnants of a drunken tantrum. 

"Heyyy." Schlatt greets the mercenary waiting in the doorway. "Come on in." 

"How much do I get paid for my trouble?" The mercenary asks, slouching in a too-large purple hoodie and baggy pants. 

"Fifteen billion, take it or leave it." Schlatt grins. 

"I'll take it. But this is the last time." 

"Sure, honey." 

"How'd you lose him again?" 

"Bitch killed half my fucking scientists." Schlatt shrugs genially, hiding his irritation. "But we've got a neutralizing agent, now." He tosses a capsule to the mercenary, who catches it and inspects it. "Inject that and he'll be as harmless as a two-ton hippo." 

"That's hardly what I'd call harmless." 

"Eh, semantics. He won't be immortal." 

"Hmm." The mercenary pockets the neutralizer. "I'll do it. But you'd better pay me exactly what you promised, or he dies." 

"C'mon, darling, what do you take me for? A scam artist?? Nah, that's not my fucking style. Return him safe and sound, and everything will be just fine." Schlatt lights a cigar, takes a deep drag, then lets it all out in a slow plume. "Do as I say and nobody gets hurt." 

++++

Eret opens his buzzing phone and answers, "Hey." 

"Crocodiles don't cry often." The familiar voice says coldly into their ear. 

"Crocodile tears are worthless." Eret replies. 

Purpled laughs on the other end. "What do you say, partner? Ready to make some dough?" 

Eret grins, baring her teeth. "Always." 

Chapter 7 (Next)

[noobsomeexagerjunk]

we wake with the intent to find enlightenment

Eret was what any sensible Minecraft server would call a "player of games," descending from the first slayers of the Dragon that dreamed hard enough to achieve the highest level. He was the epitome of what the voices whispered in their little poem.

Well, he was supposed to be.

In a sudden new development of powers, Eret converses and looks back on conversations to finally figure himself out, to finally wake up.

(read on AO3)

chapter 1: and all those sparkles in my eyes still remain

When you talk with enough people, you are forced to think.

When you think hard enough, you are forced to change.

Eret did not mean to trim away (or make disappear, based on his witness) all the leaves from the trees in his castle garden with a flick of his hand, but he just did.

He neared one bald trunk and touched the branches. It was odd how clean the cut was.

He reckoned that something about his person changed that caused the phenomenon to happen.

That kind of change had not happened since he was still growing up when he was as young as the few children on the server, most of whom he loved fervently.

The first time he knew he was different from the other children, human or otherwise, was the white of his eyes, which were aglow perpetually and unnatural enough to make people, who didn’t have the family eyes, unnerved around him. At some point, people began to flee at the sight of him.

Perhaps it’s the legend that one relative of his that he had made for himself— yeah, that’s right.

That said relative had remarkable power and chose to make himself a nightmare amongst servers, which was a feat no one in his immediate family, with their own powers, chose to do. None of them had that kind of audacity.

Neither did he, who then just decided to chop down the naked trees, planting new ones in their place.

The mystery of the kin who had Eret’s blood could make monsters, villains, but also heroes, leaders, gods even! They’re the epitome of dreaming, of what man should be in the sandboxes that Minecraft offered. Eret, by blood, descended from those who lived fully through uncovering the hidden truths from that so-called poem, the poem a server would whisper to those who, when the dragon of that server’s End is slain, actually save the End in question.

Eret’s power gave him a particular knowledge when he first stepped into the Dream SMP, a knowledge that framed him as an alien god trapped in the fragile clay that was the average Dream SMP mortal. It’s knowledge of the End but knowing the art of respect (and in that knowledge, not breaking the rules concerning its restriction).

Despite all that, Eret was left still trying to figure whatever the fuck he was. She was? They were?

Eret was, as far as he knew, something .

Wilbur said he was a traitor.

Dream said he was a king.

Everyone else said he was a puppet.

He made himself a historian.

He was something. Some...things?

Eret knew that he and he alone dictated his identity. He did not know whether he was happy with what he gathered, with what he made, with what he was.

Blinking back into reality, Eret dropped his enchanted netherite axe, leaves now restored. He hadn’t even begun cutting down the trunks!

“Okay, this is getting weird,” He remarked, picking up his axe and placing it back in his inventory.

He then walked back into the quarters of his castle, heading into that hidden boudoir where he did his more private and intimate matters concerning his person.

Armor off, then after some consideration, robe off as well.

In his regality and decoration, Eret always felt most like himself wearing gray shirts and blue jeans. It was bland, (as one drunk Wilbur Soot once whispered to him playfully, during one of those nights before everything went wrong,) but it was comfortable.

The mirror of the boudoir was massive, reaching the room’s high ceilings, making Eret’s figure so small from within the room’s walls.

Eret picked up his crown from off his head and took a good look at it. The marks of enchantment on the golden material resembled blood splatter, the pretty, intricately-carved jewels covered in beautifully contrasting impurities.

Now, the SMP’s other known leaders, or at least those most fascinated by its powers? They were intriguing to Eret, many of them possessing skills he wished he himself had. In their crafts and games, it was odd how Eret never could hold his own against them.

Eret’s craft was a museum. Unlike symphonies, it had the right to remain forever unfinished. It depended on housing so many stories—there were too many stories left unsalvageable.

Eret’s game was the game of Jacks. As bad as he was at the game, it was the game he can’t help but choose to play. The ball is bouncy just as his crown is heavy, the bones in hands as little as the friends he actually had.

The (let’s be real here,) crown of thorns—the Crown which was currently in Eret’s possession—both allured and terrified, like a bomb waiting to be used, waiting to blow up.

Bombs made Eret remember a conversation with Tubbo and Captain Puffy on a visit to Snowchester.

“Independent?” Eret picked up the Declaration of Independence on the podium, reading the haphazard handwriting of the founder of Snowchester.

“Have you come to contest it, your majesty?” Tubbo approached from behind him with a snarking tone; pulling with him on a lead was a bay horse that Puffy was riding on.

“Well, no, as nothing of any harm is,” The nukes, ”um, well-“

“Yes, we are peaceful, aren’t we?” Tubbo maintained his tone.

“Besides the nukes, Tubbo?” Puffy interjected.

“It’s a deterrent!” The teen repeated, “Like I said earlier, Eret. I’ve got them decommissioned and we don’t want any trouble.”

“Yeah, I can see how you’d come to that kind of protection,” Eret remembered Doomsday, “though I would request—actually no, recommend you communicate with me if you are going to use them at any point.”

“For what?”

“The help would be needed. You never know.” Eret was reminded of an equally alien red. Tubbo had mentioned seeing some growths on his land during their earlier conversation.

“I never do know, don’t I?”

Eret chuckled lightly, “Well, Tub-”

Tubbo suddenly smacked the ewe off the horse, much to her dismay.

“Tubbo! That hurt!”

“Thank you for getting off my horse,” Tubbo said, absurdly and frankly.

“Are you alright, Puffy?” Eret quickly went to pick her up, only for Puffy to be standing when he was at a reasonable distance from her.

“I’m good, I’m good.”

Puffy was quite a character. Her request of resignation was something he happily allowed, as her disillusionment with the server certainly coincided with his. He made no public spectacle of it (though to be fair, he never made a spectacle of his knight table, to begin with,) but had a meal with Puffy for it.

This was the price of an unannounced excursion. You leave for a month to make sense of all the chaos you’ve had to endure healthily only to come back to an even worse Dream SMP.

You have come back negligent. Wasn’t the break supposed to make you a better ruler?

Eret remembered welcoming Puffy when she first arrived, disheveled and a bit of a klutz, though nonetheless friendly.

Of course, who wouldn’t be a mess joining the Greater SMP, most especially after a historical act of political terrorism?

Eret quickly repressed the thought of Wilbur, though the dead fellow’s charisma seemed to leak out of Puffy’s excitability. She acted much like him, much like he was before Eret had hurt him: quick to founding family, being a shoulder to cry on, quick to burn when necessary, being a paragon of hope against tyranny and towards peace.

Captain Puffy had long wooly locks, brown and highlighted with a prismatic shade of white. She hid her eyes behind glasses like his, enigmatic like himself, surely? This ewe walked into the server with a friendly, warm wool onesie of many colors, reflected in her horns and hooves.

Eret’s shock was reasonable when she came to their little arranged meal together in a brand new costume.

She looked so much like Wilbur, as attractive as him, even. This was the man who had the ambition to fight tyranny through a division Eret thought at the time as dangerous.

The reminder can no longer be avoided.

In some way, Eret felt he was correct about the effect of L’Manburg, of it being a further cause of division in a server that didn’t need to create factions but to simply negotiate with words—to coexist and be passive and not be so Goddamn stubborn.

Dream and Wilbur, in their disagreements, agreed they were both unbelievably stubborn. Too mortal, too measly, two mere men...Eret found it awful how they fashioned themselves as immovable objects. He, for one, belonged to a race of men far more powerful than that of the two, and yet they had the audacity! What are simple server owners and the children of angels to dreamers? To the descendants of those who had taken the universe’s whims to heart? To the same brood that begotten the nightmare known as Herobrine?

Eret was something, but that something was not Herobrine, that’s for sure.

Wilbur could only handle so much. L’Manburg could only handle so much.

The stains of betrayal still prod and cry at Eret before his very eyes.

Nevermind. Eret wasn’t as sure, now that he thought harder about it.

He huffed to himself. He was being fickle.

Captain Puffy was quite fickle. She bent and broke like him, if her resignation as a knight was of any indication. She mothers a god but is so ever mortal and yet is so humble. People and happiness mattered to her, and that was why Eret loved her.

The tricorn hat and the long coat, worn out by what seemed to be the waters of storms instead of the fires of war, were an ashen color, black like obsidian, and were punctuated with gold pads, embroidery, and buttons.

She wore glasses like his, in that through certain angles, semi-hid eyes of enchanted prismarine. As we know, Eret’s glasses hid a blinding, mythical pair of whites.

“That’s quite the look there,” Eret remarked at the sight of her, almost tempted to blush.

“Yeah,” Puffy failed to hide her hesitance, “I, um, thought I needed a wardrobe change.”

“You didn’t have to dress up for this, you know?”

“I know, I know,” Puffy put a lock behind her ear, “This is just—how do I put this? Um, a necessity.”

He was about to jokingly question whether she was going to war, but then stopped himself in realization.

“I see. Come,” He gestured to her to follow him towards the table and food he set up before her arrival.

[crystalelemental]

Come, friends.  Let me tell you a tale, of the single most bullshit off-type 2k clear I’ve ever done.

So, Ghost-type can blitz literally anything with Goth Gals, who are unstoppable in general.  We took half sync time countdown because they literally could not lose.

So then round 2, and fun fact!  My first attempt at this, I had used the Champion Iris team against Lorelei.  I swear, only Champion Iris dealing real damage, and we beat it first try.  But then I realized wait, Classic Elesa is technically supereffective damage, and we can’t do that, I have to switch.  So we went to Bruno, who was a bit tougher, but only because 2/3 sync moves Iris used on him missed the crit.  Thanks, 80%.  The fact they still won without that is insane, though.  I have the resources for it, and might just make Champion Iris EX.  I feel like she’s going to be absolutely tremendous in Legendary Gauntlet.

But enough talk of the future, because it’s time to talk bullshit.  Realizing that I had accidentally used up my only good team on other matches, I realized I had to now deal with Lorelei some other way.  Grass Gals couldn’t actually do it, entirely because the sides are bastards who can hit special defense, and you know Dawn can’t take that.  So after some attempts with various teams, we ended on nuking her to high hell with Knight Diantha and two Potion users.  THIS TOOK FOREVER.  Diantha kept missing crits, MPR on Potion kept failing on both options, Leaf got a flinch like one time but somehow didn’t queue up her move before Lorelei did so it was for nothing.  Just the most amount of bullshit fuckery I’ve seen in ages, and it took like a dozen attempts to get it to work.  With Knight Diantha!  One of the best units in the game, and it was still this brutal!  What the absolute fuck, Electric-weak Lorelei?  Your grid better live up to this shit.

Oh but we’re not done talking about her yet.  Because the successful clear?  She missed the crit on Pelipper.  And as a result, it got another Surf off and she died.  Leaving it with a small but relevant amount of HP left, for fucking Leaf and Misty to deal with.  Thankfully, Swimsuit Misty got Sync and dealt a solid 2.5k without a crit somehow (probably from all the goddamn sync buffs), and Leaf finally got a flinch after they both took another Surf and nearly both died, allowing them to slowly whittle away the last of its HP.  This was so close as to be absurd.  What should’ve been a clear win on Diantha’s part wound up in a near loss, only to somehow turn back around due to random happenstance.  This fight sucks.

So then we go to Agatha, and honestly, after that dumpster fire, I was convinced this wouldn’t work and I’d be scrambling to find another off-type team.  But it did!  Cyrus’ Hydro Pump remains ridiculous, and actually cleared this reasonably well.  Oh, except the part where May’s sync crit missed, and we almost died.  That was an adventure.  What the fuck is with you guys missing 80% crit rates today?

So that left Blue to deal with Psychic-spam, and it went about as well as you could expect.  SS Lusamine almost killed both sides just on sync.  Literally unstoppable.

So yeah, off-type, still possible.  Don’t recommend it, Lorelei is an awful pain to deal with.

[crossdressingdeath]

Just a reminder that if you have time and feel like writing that post you mentioned about how you would rewrite each DBH character’s story given unlimited runtime, it would be very cool to read.

Ah, right. Quick note that I don’t know much about Connor’s machine path or the violent revolution path or any ending to Kara’s story that doesn’t involve successfully getting past the border guard so I will be skimming those parts of the story. Also it’s going to be pretty vague because Details Are Hard. (Also I’m tired so this is probably not going to make a lot of sense or be in any sort of reasonable order.)

Okay, general points first. I feel like the three stories should intersect more, even if only in a “seeing the aftermath of their actions” way; maybe Connor and Hank are sent to investigate Zlatko’s death after Kara and Alice have gone through, for example. You’ve got three protagonists active at the same time and they barely interact! Come on, give us a little conversation. And of course the public opinion system needs to be used a lot more; it only effects two things in the whole game, come on! It doesn’t impact any of the major human characters, and that just feels wrong. I’ll. come back to this in Connor’s section because I feel like it would be best used there (since there really aren’t many humans in the story outside of his parts and the ones who do show up have reasons to side with or against the deviants outside of public opinion), but if nothing else I’d like it to lead to us seeing humans demonstrating/fighting with the deviants. Also I would like to see at least a few examples of androids deviating peacefully, like Connor does; I don’t believe for a second that there weren’t androids who deviated in a place where they were surrounded by people who were with them all the way.

So, first off: Markus. Mostly I’d just want to extend the timeline a bit and add some more Jericho missions, because oh my god you cannot join an organization of people with no weapons or resources of any kind, become their leader, and successfully change society in less than a week. So just... more evidence of Markus slowly winning Jericho over and helping them gather supplies and resources. Show him helping them set up actual supply lines! Rescuing deviants! Winning over allies! Including human ones, because the idea that there isn’t a single human working with Jericho when pretty much every major human character is in fact on the deviants’ side is... dumb. Also, individual missions with North, Simon and Josh; it would be good to spend more time getting to know them, since as it stands it’s... kind of hard to care all that much when they die. I might also add short scenes where we see Connor’s targets arriving in Jericho if they survive, just to add more connection between the stories (and also I like them and wish more had been done with them). And make Simon a love interest (because this is a choice-heavy game and so I should be able to make the choice to play exclusively as gay androids if that’s what I want), and make it easier to avoid having a love interest; let’s not create a situation where entering into a relationship less than a week after gaining emotions is all but mandatory, hm? Also, maybe Markus should meet Kamski one time? As the guy fulfilling Kamski’s deviant-related plans? Come on, one meeting. Maybe clear up Kamski’s motivations just a bit. And, crossing over with Connor’s story, maybe a bit of stuff them both being part of the RK line and how it went from a caregiver android to a detective android. Oh, and change it so that you’re not guaranteed to have fatalities on the violence path, because insisting that only pacifism can possibly end happily when fighting against oppression seems kind of... not great, all things considered. Frankly given the androids’ combat abilities it kind of makes more sense to have unavoidable deaths on the pacifism route, or alternately to have different unavoidable deaths on both routes, but being admittedly a softy I am very happy to have it be possible to have no deaths on either route. I don’t necessarily expect it to be easy to save everyone (it might make sense to add in missions where you make preparations to increase their odds of survival, or do something similar to Simon’s possible death in Stratford Tower where one of other protagonists’ actions has an effect on the sequence of events), but it would be nice to have it be possible.

On to Kara; I mentioned this before, but instead of her story being a cute-but-boring game-long escort mission where you have to protect a small child who is entirely useless I’d give her a story about uncovering how deviancy works and the history of it. Whether it really is just a glitch or something more, what rA9 actually is... all that fun stuff. No idea how that would actually go, but it would be more interesting than just running to Canada. If nothing else we could get more backstory on how the hell Kamski managed to create androids who are so realistic that that they can develop emotions. And if it is just a glitch there can be more discussion on whether or not simulated emotions are as real as actual emotions, because the fact that they brought up the concept of deviant emotions being a simulation and did nothing with it just feels like a massive waste of potential. And I’d add some more ways to live; from what I understand it’s really hard to keep everyone alive unless you maybe possibly condemn a couple and their baby to freeze to death or get killed by a revolution and keep things peaceful in Markus’s story. While I do want more interaction between the stories, I don’t think your choices in one story should automatically lock you out of getting the best ending for one of the other stories (with the obvious exception of the situations where that actually makes sense; can’t get the best ending for Connor and Hank if Markus nukes the city while Hank is in it, for example). At least with Kara; her story is so separate from Markus and Connor’s that it doesn’t make sense for Markus’s actions to lock her out of escaping to Canada! Also, it adds nothing to the story to have Alice turn out to be an android and robs Kara of her close human companion who has a massive impact on her life; yeah, there’s Rose, but she’s in... what, two missions? That’s less than Karl, who has the additional story impact of having been Markus’s father figure for (if memory serves) years before the start of the game, so there’s no dynamic to build; it’s already there. Keep Alice human! It’s a completely pointless twist! ...I recognise that this does mean that Connor can get a young human girl killed by succeeding in stopping a deviant, but it wouldn’t take much to rewrite his run-in with Kara to not involve a chase across a freeway. Again, I’ll come back to this when I get to Connor’s section. But imagine the impact of things like Todd’s abuse and Zlatko’s section if Alice is human; showing that these villains don’t necessarily see androids and humans as different, but in a negative sense this time. Also, I’d like a sort of prologue to her story featuring the incident that got her broken and led to her being repaired at the start of the game.

And of course now we get to Connor, the best boy who deserves the best. I’ll start with the things I said I’d come back to. First, the public opinion system: imagine if Hank’s thoughts on deviants (instead of just changing for no apparent reason beyond a handful of meetings with people who generally kick his ass and then run away or die with at most a bit of conversation) could be altered by public opinion of the deviants’ cause. Even better; by that and his relationship with Connor. Picture a situation where Hank doesn’t trust or like deviants at all due to them running around killing people but still helps them because he wants to help Connor. It would just be very good. Also, since Connor is the only character hanging out exclusively with humans (what with the station full of cops he’s working out of): imagine more missions taking place (or at least starting) in the precinct where Connor can interact with his sort of coworkers and how the conversations with them could change as time passes and public opinion changes. Also again the possibility for a conflict between dislike of deviants and fondness for this particular android, just for fun. And, also just for fun, maybe a bit of character development for Gavin where he’s still a dick (because honestly he’d be less fun if he wasn’t) but if public opinion is high he’ll pretend not to notice Connor sneaking into the evidence locker and fucking around in there for a while when he really definitely isn’t supposed to. Come on, if you’re going to have heroic cops you could at least do something with more than one of them. Also, more Captain Fowler. All we know is that he and Hank are old friends and he’s totally okay with Hank beating the shit out of Perkins; all in all I’d like to know a bit more about him. And with Kara and Alice: the freeway chase works, sure, but I would like the option for Connor to at least try to save Alice; by this point Connor is already showing signs of software instability, if we change it so that Alice is human him putting the mission aside to save a little girl makes sense and gives us a good sense of who he is as a person, and it fits neatly into steadily escalating refusal to complete his mission that eventually reaches full deviancy. If I’m remembering the order right it’s Ortiz’s android (who you can’t let escape), Kara (who you can let go based on Hank’s orders), Rupert (who you can let go to save Hank), the Tracis (who you can let go just because), and then Markus (who you have to deviate to spare); changing it so that you can let Kara go to save a little girl she’s protecting fits the escalation (you could easily argue that Connor has something in his programming about saving human lives, and as one of his earlier missions shows him being specifically trying to save a little girl it makes a great deal of sense that he wants to protect Alice. Also like. Imagine having the option to push Alice out of the way of a car at the cost of Connor’s life. It would be very effective, I think. Also it’s another opportunity to make Hank like you because he would for sure react well to you saving a small child from getting hit by a car.

Alright, moving on; I’d like some more assignments with Connor before he joins the DPD and gets partnered with Hank, showing him actually earning the title of deviant hunter? Also that way we aren’t stuck with the conclusion that CyberLife decided to send their prototype out into the world to partner with the police in investigations after one mission, which said prototype may well have failed to complete. And we could show more of Connor struggling with what he’s being ordered to do but having no way of stopping himself due to a complete lack of any interaction with anyone with functioning emotions, except for maybe CyberLife technicians. Actually, I’d also like to see what it’s like for Connor going to CyberLife for repairs and debriefing and such, because I doubt it’s fun. Other than that... well, Connor’s story is pretty good all things considered, but there are a couple tweaks I’d make. Aside from the previously mentioned exploration of what it means that he and Markus are both part of the RK line, I’d maybe cap off the added early story for him by adding him being hesitant about turning in Ortiz’s android if you’ve been pushing for more software instability and only going through with it when it becomes clear that if he doesn’t all he’ll achieve is getting himself caught not doing his job, which wouldn’t be a good look. I feel like the most effective way to do it might be if it’s not under player control; if his software instability is high enough he’ll be uncertain about it, and if he’s not he won’t be. And if he is uncertain you could add some options to the interrogation where he can win trust by telling the android he was scared of what would happen to him if he didn’t turn him in (followed by him immediately insisting that that was just a cunning ploy and in no way true when pressed on the matter if he did it out loud and not through an interface). Also: why wasn’t it Hank who pushed Connor to deviate. You spend Connor’s entire story with Hank! He is Connor’s tie to humanity! Why does Connor deviate in one conversation with a complete stranger and not his dearest friend! I desperately want a situation where Hank learns too much or something and Connor is ordered to shoot him and you can either go through with it (killing Hank) or deviate and shoot whoever gave you the order instead. Also then there could be hugs. And maybe forehead kisses because please. Connor deserves a little smooch honestly. He’s earned it. And then if your relationship with Hank is low enough that he’s already dead at this point you can have the conversation with Markus. Also, I would love an addition to the machine path where if you have a high relationship with Hank you can choose to deviate before fighting him (instead of just walking away despite that preventing Connor from finishing his mission quickly) or to deviate after fighting him when he’s got Hank hanging off the edge of the roof. Think about it; a moment of horrified realisation where Connor’s software is finally pushed to the breaking point by having to choose whether or not he will kill his only friend for the sake of his mission where he’s left desperately asking himself what the hell he’s doing? Like, if nothing else it would hammer home the fact that at this point Connor is choosing to remain a machine (assuming his software instability is high enough) to have to choose it twice even at the cost of Hank’s life. Actually three times, because the initial choice would be before this point. Also going that way it would be possible to play through the machine path up to the fight with Hank and still net Connor’s best ending, which would just be nice I think. Also, more hugs. Hugs are good.

...Okay, that’s all I can think of for now. Also it’s uh. almost 1 AM here and sleep is in fact important. So I’m going to wrap up here; maybe I’ll make some more posts later if I think of anything else.