#He’s crying over Oscar the Grouch

[meteor752]

People trying to give Etho an original looking design instead of just essentially drawing Kakashi are cowards

[imaginedreamwrite]

Oh 7 is Curtis vibes 100%

Trigger warning: mentions of domestic violence, mentions of past domestic violence

His heavy footfalls in the deepening woods were still well placed compared to yours, and with every step he had taken in relative strength, you had seemed to stumble forward. You weren’t used to the thick undergrowth of the forest or the potential tripping hazards that were undetectable to you. Even for Curtis, who had essentially been born and bred on the very edge of civilization, had occasionally caught himself by surprise.

“Keep up-“

“-buttercup.” You snickered under your breath, following him into the woods while occasionally spying the axe over his shoulder with speculation.

The wooden handle seemed as if it was near the point of cracking and there was a rust line along the sharp edge of the axe that showed its well worn surface. Though it had been well used, obviously, Curtis had negated the idea of trying to get a new one.

“Ya know, you’re awful quiet-“

“Y/N.” he snapped and turned sharply on his heel, staring down at you with growing ire and burning eyes. “I promised your brother I’d keep you safe from your ex-fiancé but if you don’t shut your mouth-”

“Why are you grumpy all the time? Fuck me.” You rolled your eyes and crossed your arms over your chest, huffing deridingly. “You’re being paid aren’t you?”

“Move. Your. Ass.” Curtis grunted, placing a hand at the small of your back and giving you a sharp push to walk in front of him. “God forbid you trip of a blade of grass and break your neck.”

“Oscar the grouch has a better attitude than you,” you mumbled, taking the path he wanted you to while rubbing your hands together, “and he lives in a trash can.”

“You’re a pain in my ass.” Curtis regaled his continued irritation with a harsh huff of his own before he started stalking after you.

It was another half mile before he whistled sharply for you to stop. When you looked over your shoulder toward your warden, you watched him aimlessly swing his axe at a half logged tree with enough strength and power to, almost, cut it straight through.

Every swing was met with a soft grunt, every strike of the axe on the wood was another spike of potential desire that struck you deep. The longer you’d looked at Curtis chopping wood as if it was nothing more than cutting paper, the more attracted to the sailor’s tongue that cursed you out this morning.

“Princess, start packing.” Curtis spat to the left, his eyes narrowing in your direction and his lips slowly parting. “Y/N…take slow steps toward me.”

Fear struck you, the sensation of being watched had given rise to goosebumps on your arms. You wanted to turn your head. You wanted to look at what was behind you though you thought that if you had, you’d truly lose your last bits of composure.

“Y/N, dammit!” Curtis hissed, slow and harshly but quietly. “Take slow fucking steps-”

You heard it then, the sharp hissing and the yeowling coming from behind you. Hair on the back of your neck stood on end and you were given the impression that you were being stalked by something that wouldn’t think twice about sinking their teeth into your neck.

“Turn around and walk back, slowly.” Curtis directed you, and as you slowly turned around to face whatever beast was there, it jerked forward.

A shrill cry ripped from your mouth just as Curtis had darted froward with his axe in hand, and grabbed hold of the back of your shirt. It was a quick tug to send you flying away from the animal to your back, the wind being knocked from your lungs as you made contact with the hard ground.

You saw stars in your vision, mind completely rampant and you’d almost been completely unaware that you were crying until you felt hands cupping your cheeks.

“Fuck!” He cursed, your vision coming to focus as he appeared above you. “Princess, you fuck-”

You jerked away from him, crawling a few feet before the first bout of bile spilled from your lips. Your fingernails dug into the wet blanket of rotting leaves, the tainted stench of copper burned your nose.

“Y/N-”

“Get away from me!” You screamed at him through tears, your throat burning and your head pounding as if someone had stabbed you in the head. “Get the fuck away from me!”

It all came to a head, you lowered your upper body to the dirty forest floor and sobbed. Every ounce of heartbreak, fear and devastation from your broken relationship was pouring from you. Your near death experience had rocked you although it was just the tip of whatever hellish iceberg you were being throttled by.

“Get the fuck away from me…” you whined, you wailed and laid there on the forest floor with your lower body still angled into a crawling position.

It was nefarious, the mess you made of yourself. And like your ex fiancé had, over and over, you expected Curtis to figuratively kick you when you were down and leave you.

You almost wanted him to, you didn’t want him to see you like this. Not with snot and vomit, tears and puffy afflicting you. You didn’t want him to see you stuck in a position of weakness that your ex-fiancé had forced you into time and time again.

“Get the fuck-!" You bit at him, you cursed him over and over, trying to fight him as he lifted you from the forest floor.

Your legs were kicking, your arms swinging to bat him off of you. Until a light switch had been flicked and you went limp in his arms with your head lolling back and your eyes transfixed on the sky. Tears were rolling down your cheeks and your chest was heaving from the approach of a panic attack.

“Beautiful Dreamer, wake unto me. Starlight and dewdrops are waiting for thee. Sounds of the rude world heard in the day. Lull'd by the moonlight have all passed away!” You started singing the familiar song, slowly and quietly whispering as Curtis carried you away from whatever animal was laying there.

You didn’t look, you couldn’t look. Rather you kept your eyes trained to the greying blanket of clouds trapping cool air in, and the crunch of twigs under his boots.

“Beautiful dreamer, queen of my song. List while I woo thee with soft melody. Gone are the cares of life's busy throng.” Curtis’ voice surprised and captivated you, his deep rumble echoed in your ears as he sung the same song as you, hands clutching your protectively.

[hayscodejew]

With 230(!) votes, the results are in for round one of the Nice Jewish Character Showdown! Voting for round two is live here, and is open until 6 pm EST on Friday, October 28th. Check below the break for detailed results on the first round of voting!

The Pines twins scratched the Strilondes out of their save file, winning 88.3% of the vote (203) versus their 11.7% (17).

Tommy Pickles is being put down for his nap, losing the vote with 38.7% (89) against Ron Stoppable's 61.3% (141).

As much as I love Toby (and had him as the winner on my own bracket), his political know-how was no match for James Buchanan Barnes, raking in only a third of the votes (31.3%, 72 votes, versus 68.7% and 158).

The war of the SoCal NJBs who rocked our tv screens in the early 00's has been decided, with Seth Cohen losing the vote (19.6%, 45 votes) to Disney Channel's Gordo (80.4%, 185). The power of a bar mitzvah episode!

The first of several tight races, Gretchen Weiners has run over Cher Horowitz with a school bus (don't worry, she's fine), with a vote of 118 (51.3%) to 112 (48.7%).

Second of the neck and neck races, turns out Fran Fine is just what the doctor prescribed, beating Barbie 117 (50.9%) to 113 (49.1%). All those Christmas dresses really don't work in Babs' favor, huh?

Whatcha doin', Rachel Berry? Not winning the tournament, that's for sure! Isabella took Rachel out to the curb, with an impressive margin of 205 (89.1%) to 25 (10.9%). I'm sure Rachel will take it in stride, though -- after all, "you're all minorities, you're in the glee club" (Mr. Schue, s1e7)

In a somewhat surprising (and potentially upsetting) twist, the coded character beats the explicitly Jewish one in the battle of the Smart Bitches, knocking Christina Yang out early and keeping Miss Frizzle in the competition (175, 76.1% to 55, 23.9%). It's okay, Christina, there's space for you in the school bus. Field trip!

No surprises that our next matchup is as close as it is... with 119 votes (51.7%) to 111 (48.3%), the winner of the DC Patriarch matchup is Bruce Wayne himself, Batman. It's okay, Kal-El, I'm still thinking about the Hebrew School class when we discussed your story as a Moses allegory.

I'm convinced that Ben Grimm and Peter Parker go to the same synagogue, which makes his loss to the webslinger a bit easier to handle (29 votes to Spiderman's 201, 12.6% to 87.4%). BTW if y'all haven't read the comic where The Thing becomes canon Jewish, you're missing out.

Is anyone shocked that Spock won the Space Jews matchup? No? Me neither. As much as I love a good Futurama episode, nothing beats Nimoy. Zoidberg's going back in the dumpster he lives in behind the Planet Express building, bringing home 39 votes (17%) in comparison to Spock's whopping 191 (83%).

Yoinks, how'd the Scooby Gang manage to win this one? With a margin I by no means expected to be this definitive, the Mystery Machine pulls ahead of the ENTIRE cast of the X-Men with 154 votes (67%) to their 76 (33%).

In the war of the Magical Boys, the alchemy was not in Edward Elric's favor, getting only 39.1% of the vote (90) to Steven Universe's 60.9% (140).

The last of the neck and neck battles, turns out Sam Manson is going ghost, with 49.6% of the vote to Willow Rosenberg's 50.4% (114 to 116).

I guess my thesis had some public consensus backing, because about two thirds of y'all agree that werewolves are INCREDIBLY Jewish, 143 votes to 87 belonging to Frankenstein's Monster (62.2% and 37.8%). Stream 'Cry Wolf' on Spotify.

Oscar the Grouch's cousin Moishe is definitely pleased with the results here, with the Muppet ranking in 58.3% of the vote against Jake the Dog's 41.7% (134 to 96).

[mage-ical-character-person]

I was enjoying Sesame Street episode 88 and I just. I just need to share this with you. Okay?

Oscar wants a job he needs money that’s the thing this episode.

Mr Hooper tries to get Oscar the Grouch to work in customer service and that goes about as well as you can expect. And!! Mr Hooper’s face looks like this about it!!

I can’t get over this he looks like he’s going to cry. Genuinely what did he expect?

and then my other favorite thing is

Just. This. I don’t know. The fact that there’s a sign above Bert and Ernie’s place saying “Sitter Wanted” and the immediate conclusion the characters draw is that Bert and Ernie have a baby? Which Gordon thinks “may not work out”

[joeyskattebo]

Megan's Dream

Megan is driving down an ocean side expressway and way during an sunny afternoon; there is not an cloud in the sky on this highway just south of San Diageo, California-she is an big pretty woman in her early thirties, has long brown hair and is wearing an flower dress and black sunglasses. Megan is driving an beat up old buick with the windows down, and is tuned in to the jazz station has the volume on loud. She is not aware of this, but Megan is in an deep sleep and is in a reoccurring dream; she lights an cigarette, and begins to dance to the music; the music is fast paced, and she dances as she exhales, takes the cigarette with one hand and hangs it out the window, and then inhales gray smoke that fills the car then out the window. She continues to dance listening to the piano, bass and drums as a fast paced horn melody to play, as she takes another drag of her cigarette. She continues to drive the highway for what seems like an long time, until she exits the freeway and heads west towards the ocean. Megan drives passed an few houses, but she is mostly in the country surrounded by desert and a few palm trees; she drives closer to the ocean-as she approaches the parking lot to the beach she lights herself another cigarette when she sees dinosaurs walking all over the beach- long necked dinosaurs, t-rexes, three horned dinosaurs, and pterodactyls flying above them. As she parked her car a long necked dinosaur walks toward her car; she nervously gets out and exhales a cloud of gray smoke as she stares up at the purple long necked dinosaur that is walking closer to her and her car.

            And with that her dream changed, and Megan finds herself in the basement of her parents’ house in Oceanside, California; she is by herself and staring at an wooden bookshelf with the bright light of the fluorescent lamp behind her. She stands there staring at the bookcase for a while until she turns around and sees an bar. Big bird from Seaseme Street is making drinks for Bert and Erine, Oscar the Grouch, Elmo, Kermit the Frog, Fozzie Bear and Gronzo. Megan tries to order an drink but they tell her puppets only, so she leaves the basement only to find she is in her Grandmother's old house in San Jose, California-she sees her Grandmother as a women ten years younger than Megan herself; she is wearing an short blue dress with shoulder length hair, and is lighting a cigarette on the stove in front of her-as she leans down and takes a puff of her cigarette, he Grandfather as a young man enters the kitchen at the other end of the room then the stove-he comes out of the bathroom in suit, freshly shaven and combing his brown hair in a handheld mirror, his combs all of his hair to the side; her Grandmother than stands up and looks at her Grandfather as he puts down the mirror to look at her-they smile at each other before they both disappear as she begins to hear yelling from outside; she runs outside on this bright and sunny day with large fluffy clouds to see her Father as a child all the way her Grandparent’s walk right before the public sidewalk-he is three years old with orange hair and is crying because he fell off of his tricycle, and as her Grandparents, slightly older now,  run out to comfort him, they disappear as the bright sunny day turns into an downpour of rain-Megan turns around to her Father drive up to the house, he soon parks the car and gets out-he is nicely dressed and has neat combed hair; once again her Grandparents come out and fourteen years older, and once they the two parties walk up to each other they begin to argue; Megan can barely make out what any of them are saying when the dream changes: she is walking down some really long stairs with an old light shining down on her as she continues to walk towards the dark shadow in front of her-the more she continues to walk towards it the more the shadow moves down the stairs; the walls go up the high ceiling and have dark wood paneling, and the creaks from the wooden stairs are subtle and almost unnoticeable as Megan continues to walk down the stairs for what seems like a long time, when she finally into the shadow. And with that the dream changes again, and she finds herself in a large basketball stadium though she was the only person there:

            “Hello?” she calls out and she walks around the court of the stadium and looks around as she calls out, though no one answers her calls; she does not notice that smooth wood floor do not have an team’s name and logo on the court but show the depiction of a giant green fly playing basketball. And as she walks around and looks for a sign of life, the very fly from the painting walks up behind her.

            “Hello Megan.” Megan almost jumps into the air before quickly turning around and looking at this strange looking fly in the face.

            “Hello.”

            “It’s time to wake up Megan.”

            “What do ya mean?”

            “That’s it’s time to wake up.” This made Megan laugh a little, and she said:

            “Don’t worry Mr. Fly I will.”

            “I sure hope so.”

Unfortunately this is not an usual series of dreams from an normal night’s rest, and Megan is not laying in her bed right now-unbeknownst to her, she is actually laying in an hospital bed at the moment, and is in a serious coma; the sad truth is, after Megan Dean got into a serious car accident just south of San Diego, she has been in an coma for going on twenty eight years    

she remembers when she had mooned an eighteen year old when she had turned thirty; Megan liked showing her big round fatt butt to little young dudes, and he liked seeing her fatt butt

[amillionmillionvoices]

your last snippet made me cry! That ending 🥹😭

So from the list of prompts, this one caught my eye: “you caught me doing something dangerous and flipped out”

But against popular belief, I think, Rebecca is the one doing something dangerous… 💜

Thank you so much for the prompt!! So this got wildly out of control through no fault of my own and now is Proper Fic Length so I put it on AO3. Hope that's okay, and I hope you like it! <3

TW: violence (fist fight), blood, canon-typical references to suicide, panic attacks.

--

and all this devotion was rushing out of me

They lose.

Not badly, but they lose—it’s a brutal, dirty game and no matter what they try, what new plays they enact, Nate seems to know everything. They score one goal and West Ham score two and it’s over before they have time to get their feet under them.

The locker room is mostly silent, a stirring of disappointment, and anger at the way Ted had reached out for Nate’s hand, and Nate slapped it away. It’s not a good look for anyone, either team, but there’s the added twisting of a knife, Rupert crowing somewhere on television, and it hurts.

He doesn’t blame the team, mostly himself, but then Rebecca is there, gives a short but heartfelt speech about how proud she is of everyone and how well they played and how it isn’t over—it’s one loss, and yes, a hard one, but they still have time to win the whole damn thing and show the world what they can do. What she knows they’re all capable of.

Ted smiles, proud of her, for how far she’s come, when she looks the team over and says, “Right. No moping. We’re going out and drinks are on me,” and then the team start talking again, congratulating each other on good plays and heading for showers, and Rebecca pauses a moment to look at Ted, to give him a small smile and a nod.

Later, when they’re alone, he knows they’ll have to process, but they’ll do it together the way they’ve done everything else and that warms him somewhat.

They find a club nearby, not one of their usual haunts, and after the first round of drinks he can tell the boys are lighter. Feel less weighted. They talk about everything and nothing and there’s karaoke and Colin butchers My Heart Will Go On so badly (and, Ted thinks, on purpose, because he knows Colin can actually sing) that it becomes comical, everyone laughing together. It feels good, and the drinks keep coming and a few kind folks come up to him and say it was a rough game and they did great and fuck West Ham, and that makes him feel good, too. A bit guilty, but it’s nice to know there are fans in their corner.

And, if Rebecca sticks close to him all night, her hand on his leg under the table, that helps, too.

He’d wanted to win so badly, win it for her, but there’s no trace of disappointment in her eyes, just pride, and a love for him he’s only just starting to accept, starting to realize isn’t conditional.

They’ve been together six months, quietly, only the team and their friends know and today is not the day to announce it to anyone else, but he’s fine with that. Fine with their quiet little bubble. The way he knows they’ll go home together and hold each other and in the morning it’ll all look brighter because they’re together.

They sit at a back table with Keeley and Roy and Beard, chatting over the music, Rebecca’s thigh pressed to his. They spend a few hours just wandering from topic to topic, everything light and teasing. Roy seems tense still, however, so he isn’t surprised when Keeley finally nudges him out the booth, saying something about taking Oscar the Grouch home for a bath and “maybe a blowjob” and Ted chokes a bit on his whisky and Beard raises one eyebrow and Rebecca laughs at the way Roy’s ears, even in the darkness of the club, are obviously red.

“You’re a fucking menace,” he grumbles to Keeley, who just smirks and kisses his cheek and drags him away.

Rebecca looks at their drinks and decides refills are in order, and squeezes Ted’s knee before she slips out of the booth, and he watches her, sees her lay a hand on Isaac’s shoulder at the bar, knows she’ll be fine for a moment. With a nod to Beard, he slips out the back door.

He just needs a moment of quiet, space to breathe. His chest still feels a bit tight, and though he isn’t anxious, he quickly realizes maybe alone isn’t the best place for him right now.

So he’s grateful when Beard steps out behind him, listens as he rambles for a moment about missing stars and club smells and then admits,

“I wanted to win it for her.”

continued on ao3

[spookysmujer]

Maraschino pt.2, O. Diaz

Summary: After the rejection from Oscar, things seems to take you on a roller coaster ride. 

warnings: angst, f e e l s, theTEAbeenSPILLED ☕️ daddy issues

word count: 3.5K

a/n: Here is the highly requested part 2 of Maraschino! I had fun writing this though if it is trash it’s because I wanted to hurry and get it out for y’all since I been getting msgs. heh. But Ray? Whew chile, the ghetto! Part 3? Please enjoy and don’t forget: follow the blog, heart/comment/reblog the content as well as turn on the notifs! (Y/S/N: your sister’s name)

(gif belongs to @thesewickedhands​ ✨)

 “Have a wonderful day!”

God, why is the person yelling? You smile weakly and squeeze your eyes nearly shut as the sun is blazing down on you while you say your thanks and exit the uber. The throbbing of your head and the loud lawnmower from one of your neighbors has you internally cursing.

How did you end up like this? Granted this was the plan last night to go out and have a good time, you certainly did not expect to be doing such a thing. You never let yourself get to this point before. But you also never got denied like you did with Spooky last night. A shiver goes through your body as you think of him. You won’t let him infiltrate your mind no more.

“Y/N!” Your sister’s voice sounds frantically as you round the corner of the house.

Well there goes your plan to sneak in through your window to pretend you were in your room all along. She wraps your arms around you, gluing herself to your body causing you to stumble back a bit. “You are a dead woman walking!” She whispers to you as you arch an eyebrow at her. 

As confused as you were, José appears from around the corner taking long strides towards you. His face sports no emotion of missing you but a lot of anger. It causes you to automatically back up the closer his approaches you. Your sister has since removed herself from you as your brother is now in your face.

You blink as you peer up at him, “Where the fuck have you been, hermana? You know how much shit you are in, hm? I get a call from Y/S/N saying you aren’t home. I assure her you would be and when she calls me at 6 in the morning telling me that you still aren’t in? You left a note?”

“José! Calmate, I went out with a friend. And I spent the night. What’s the big deal about that?” You briefly explain yourself. He laughs for a moment before grabbing you by your upper arm and pulling you towards your sister. Now it’s her turn to start backing up, “Ven aqui, her! That’s the big deal. When I ask you to be the sister you need to be, I don’t mean when you feel like it. You know the Santos have been getting into heavy shit lately. I need you here when I’m not!” 

The tension is thick as you pull your arm from his hold and push him, “But when you wanna go and do whatever it’s okay? When you wanna hitch a ride with Spooky to Sin City with dirty ass hynas last week, it’s all good. Business trip, huh? Don’t come for me when you are far from perfect!” 

The two of you are both very stubborn with your brother usually being calm and collected while you’re more expressive with your feelings. Family is important to him especially considering it’s just the three of you. Jose scoffs as you stomp away from him and your now crying sister. 

Oscar suddenly appears in front of you as round the corner and collides with his body. He reaches out to grasp you before you can stumble back, the feelings hitting you all at once, “What are you doing here?” You swallow thickly.

He licks his bottom lip as his eyes rake over your body. Still in your dress from last night, hair unruly and make-up smudged. Anyone can spot a ‘walk of shame’ when they see one. He laughs internally thinking of how you wasted no time after last night’s rejection.

“I offered to drive him when little hermanita called up again worried you weren’t home yet. Seems we know why now.” A small grin painted across his lips, you squint your eyebrows at his words as you hear your brother approaching the two of you. You step back before Spooky migrates his eyes to behind you, “We got business, everything good here?”

José nods and steps beside you, “Don’t be leaving.”

The two guys leave as you stand there a bit dumbfounded. Y/S/N appears next to you and grabs your hand. She apologizes for you getting into trouble with José. You want to yell at her for starting unnecessary drama. But she explains she didn’t want your brother to potentially find out about your little sneaky link with Spooky.

“Well, he and I ended that shit so nothing to worry about. I went out and got wasted. I am done with these guys. No más!” Though even sounding like fake news to yourself, you go and wash off last night’s memories. 

As the day had gone by, you skimmed through your daily journal of all the entries you wrote about Oscar ‘Spooky’ Diaz, ripping them out. All 6 pages. You roll your eyes at your thoughts about him, some sappy and some nasty. How did you believe a man who runs a street gang, that is as mean mugging as Oscar the Grouch from Sesame Street, would be into you the way you are him?

It didn’t matter the answer now. Good riddance of him! That’s when the sound of your window opening pulls you from the wandering thoughts. You stand up quickly, reaching for a bat that’s besides your bed. “Get the fuck out!”

“Calmate! It’s me, Oscar.”

You clutch your chest, doubling over to catch your breath. “What is wrong with you? Ever think of flying a pebble at the window or calling first?” You say as he climbs in, adjusting his flannel before closing the window then your room door. You watch him as he starts to look around your room. Though there’s a part of you that wants him out, you haven’t made any advances to get him out.

He sits on your bed and finally looks at you, “Abajo.”

Uncompliant, you cross your arms and shift your weight to make it known you are fine standing there. He smirks and looks away before locking eyes with you. “You don’t think I like you too? You think I fucked with you for this long cause it was just convenient? Girls everywhere around my place but I was only fucking you. Why do you think that?”

“Is this supposed to be your sweet confession that makes me go all heart eyes? You're gonna apologize and I’m supposed to forgive you and then we give us a try and realize all our worries were nothing but fear that our anxiety instilled in our heads? Because that’s not how it’s gonna go.” You say as he gives you a semi-disgusted look.

You chuckle softly and watch him intently.

Oscar analyzes you closely. It’s a front, no doubt he thinks. He doesn’t deny the thought that you are a thick-skinned woman. He knows you have a superior mind and a mouth to go with it but he knows there is no way that you could’ve gotten over him that quick. Though judging by your appearance earlier in the day, you definitely tried.

You laugh a little more as you step in front of him and lean over to get your vision in line with his. “You made it clear to me and now I’m making it clear. Nothing you say will convince me that you give a rat’s ass about me. If you really did? There would be no sneaky link shit. You wouldn’t have a problem with people knowing about me, or my brother knowing but it is a problem so get out.”

This ticks Ocscar off a bit. He stands which makes you straighten up as he gets in your face, stepping towards you. You are stepping back slowly as he creeps more, “You think you can handle this lifestyle? The constant threats, the territories? You can’t. When it comes to this kind of life, something like love can be the bane of your existence. So we don’t get into it. We don’t get involved because the people we fall for end up dead.”

You’re pressed with your back against the wall and your chests against each other. Oscar’s eyebrows are connected and he’s staring at your agape mouth. His breath is fanning against your lips, emotions hitting you all at once. “I-I slept with someone last night. Got it good too.”

The jealous tactic seems to fail immediately as Oscar laughs. And for some reason the look of amusement on his face seems to be familiar for a reason you can’t seem to figure out.

“Sleeping around is simple, falling for someone is something else entirely. I’m not saying that we jump into something. But at least you know now it’s not just one-sided.” He steps out of your room. You follow and watch him walk down the hall as Y/S/N stands there. She is stunned seeing Oscar nonchalantly trek through the house.

You don’t know what to say. As you look at your little sister, you sigh in defeat trying to explain this one. Instead you go back into your room and shut your door. You got what you wanted, right? But you still feel like something is missing. 

The week had slowly crept on.

A few shifts at the bodega, classes at the community college and life at home. Jose had basically converted you back to your teenage ways. Making sure you were doing your part in parenting your little sister. Friday night Y/S/N wanted to have Dwayne’s BBQ for dinner and since your social life is drier than your skin, you agree. 

The thought of a  BBQ bacon cheeseburger lifts your mood which has been dragging throughout the week. Your sister happily skips into the restaurant as you trail behind slowly, when you enter you look for her and see she chatting up with Dwayne. 

“Y/N!” José calls out and your vision unfocuses from them onto your brother and pile of Santos in a booth. They all look your way including Oscar. You exhale a deep breath through your nose as you put on a fake smile and wave before stepping up to place an order. 

 Your brother approaches you as you look past him to the booth of Santos, “Didn’t know you guys would be here.” He sets down a $20 bill on the counter when the cashier tells you the total. “Foos gotta eat too.” José starts talking to you about something but your focus falls back on Spooky again. You watch as he stands and makes his way towards you. A small panic sets in your chest but fades away as he ends up exiting the BBQ joint. 

Unknowingly to yourself, your watch as he walks to his car. He leans against it and pulls out a cigarette, no matter how hard you try to avert your eyes from him, you can’t. All week you had been doing fine. Even with the little things reminding you of him, even with the memories that have been seeped into your bed. You didn’t dwell too much on thinking of him until you see him now. 

“Talk to him.” 

It’s just like the movies where the car tires come to a screeching halt and there’s the obnoxious crashing sound. You move your eyes to your brother’s. Did he just say what you think he said? “Talk to him? Spooky, what for? Why would I need to talk to him?”

Jose chuckles, “Hermana, I had my suspicions about you two. Then he told me bout it, he acts like it doesn’t bother him much but it does so go talk to him. Yeah, I’m not so thrilled that he’s messing around with my baby sister. I know how he is but I know he wouldn’t do anything to intentionally hurt you so I’m cool with it. So go talk to him, figure that shit out because I’m getting over you moping around the house.”

You push him away as you look back to the red impala.  After a moment of contemplating it, you decide to head out and approach Oscar, he had his eyes on you since he settled by his car. You lean on it besides him and cross your arms, “You told my brother?”

He smirks and shrugs his shoulders. You try your best to keep the smug look off your face. He holds out the cigarette, you take it and inhale. Coughing a bit as the smoke burns your throat a little. You hand it back and sigh, turning to look at him.

“I like you, you like me. I’m not saying we jump into something… but why not?” You question as he exhales some smoke, you lock your eyes into his, “You ain’t cut for this lifestyle, you would be a liability. Plus your brother in my line of work? That makes him vulnerable as well. It woul--”

You groan loudly which quiets him mid-rant, “Drugs, alcohol and money do all the same things to him too. You see how he is when he gets wasted. There are so many things that make you all vulnerable. If he can make it work with the hyna he’s with, then you can make it work with me. Plus I know this lifestyle more than you think. I know when and where to be and not to be. I know who to know and who not to know. I know things! So don’t act all big bad Spooky to me.”

Now standing directly in front of him and he’s peering down at you. He dips his face lowers and looks at your lips as you look at his. In no time your lips are connected. Oscar slides his hands over your waist, gripping it and pushing you flush against him. You bring your hands to cup his face, letting your tongue slip into his mouth. A full on make-out session breaks out.

As if you didn’t dream of something like this happening you smile into the kiss, pulling away, “You get into this with me, it’s not gonna be glitter and gold. This shit is tough, I can’t be worrying about the things I already do plus you.” You nod and kiss him again, wringing your arms around his neck, he hugs you and feels calm for the first time in a while.

So you enjoy the night more than you thought you would be. With your siblings and the Santos at Dwayne’s. After a night of chatting, Oscar asks you to come back to his place. And well since it isn’t your first rodeo, you agree and send Y/S/N home with José. 

You don’t keep your hands off him while heading back to his place, you are pressed against him and kissing his neck, he is loving every moment of it. The both of you get out to head into the house but the mood is killed when you walk in to find Cesar and his friends on the couch who get frightened due to the scary movie playing on the TV.

Oscar cursing under his breath, “Can’t you watch movies at some else’s house?” You elbow him as he rolls his eyes. But Cesar didn’t want to start anything with his older brother so he asks Jamal if they can continue watching at his house. Soon after the house is empty and quiet again. The two of you settle on the couch, you straddling him and pulling your top off.

“Yo! There’s someone posted up outside!” Cesar suddenly bursts through the door which causes Oscar to push you off him and reach for his gun. He tells the younger Diaz, his friends and you to stay put as he checks out the fool that runs up on the Santo trap house. You scramble to put your shirt back on and curse when Cesar trails after his brother. You follow in pursuit, trying to tell Cesar that Oscar said to stay inside. “Who is that?” 

“Ray?” You say out loud though you thought you were just thinking it.

Oscar turns to you when you say the name of none other than his estranged father. You look to both Ray and Oscar, looking at the two men and making the connection. You feel the color get sucked out of your face, oh fuck.

“You know him, who is he?” Cesar asks you and he looks at Oscar. The Santo leader has his eyes on you and is still confused as to how the hell you know his father. “He’s our father.” Oscar says, still looking at you.

The confirmation makes you want to be obliterated right in your very spot. This can’t be happening! Is it? You try to speak but nothing comes out of your mouth. You finally look to Ray who has a small smirk on his face and that’s why that look Oscar had on his face that day seemed so familiar. You saw it that night you went out of town to have a good time. 

“Hola de nuevo, pequeña coyote.” Ray says looking at you. 

You grimace as Oscar connects the dots himself. The amount of heat that settles into your face along with the gasps from Cesar’s friends don’t make it any easier to bear.

“Wait Oscar, wait!” He is stepping towards his father, ready to charge. “I didn’t know he was your dad! Listen to me, please!” You step forward quickly and pull his arm back, he yanks it out of your grasp quickly as you plead for him to listen to you.

Oscar begins to snap at you, “Him? This is who you slept with and you want me to listen to explain? Huh?!” The anger booms in his voice as he is mere inches from your face. Cesar appears next to you trying to get between the two of you. You didn’t think Oscar could ever get so mad. And you have seen the Santo leader in moments of rage before. 

“Mijo, listen..” 

Ray’s voice sounds from behind Oscar now. He turns and wastes no time in welcoming him with a right hook. His father stumbles back as you gasp along with the sounds from the teens. “Oscar!”

You take the initiative to stand between the two of them, holding out a hand against Oscar’s chest as he is heaving and exuding anger. Ray is mending to his jaw as he stands up. You notice the lights of the neighbor had turned on and people were beginning to pile outside of their homes to see all the commotion.

“Oscar just stop and listen to me for one fucking second! No, I did not sleep with Ray. We did get together that night, yes but we didn’t do anything that involves other body parts. I started going off about you with him, I vented and we spent the night drinking. I got too wasted and he offered to let me spend the night in his motel room. Nothing happened!” You release in one breath. 

Everyone looks at you, unable to make sense of the situation. 

“That’s why I came, when she mentioned things about you, I had to come see for myself if what niña said is true. That you’re running the Santos.” The two men stare at each other as you stand in the middle. Your heart is racing. 

Oscar doesn’t say anything as he looks back and forth between his father and you. When you step towards him and reach out to grab his hand, he raises his hand up in defense and steps back. You can see the glint of hurt in his eyes as he backs away from you. Your eyes pleading for him to try to understand everything.

You trail behind a fuming Oscar into his house, you are nearly jogging when you catch up with him. But he steps into his room and slams the door in your face. You step back and sigh. “Please talk to me…Oscar. Nothing happened, you have to believe me.” 

He doesn’t respond as you rest your head on his door. You hold your hands on the door silently cursing yourself. What could you say that made the situation sound better? How could you make it look like it really was nothing even with Ray right there?

A few moments have passed by when the door opens, a still very upset Oscar stands there as he flies forwards a bunch of crumbled paper at you. You watch as the papers fall to your feet and he slams the door in your face again. No context of nothing. 

When you pick up the papers, it’s drawings of you. Portraits sketched out from a ballpoint pen. Some dated as far back as a month ago to as recent as a few days ago. Oscar drew you. He did so multiple times and in such craft it takes your breath away. 

You feel the tears begin to well in your eyes. The pain that you have caused him. How do you fix this?

taglist: @clemmingstylins0n @fairygardenss@princesstiffxoxo@firebenderwolf @spookysnena @mbaku-babygirl @chellybear98@multiyfandomgirl40 @i-just-wanna-live-gc@roury66 @kkim120 @lillict @tinylumpiaa @prettymya3@starrynite7114 @onmyspookysblock @aneitii @b3mybunnybaby  @angelxfics  @spookysbabymama @ladylj @vayagrxce @irenne-stans @boujee-bitches (please let me know if you want to be added or removed!)

[youngbeezer]

Idk if you would write for him, but that last prompt, the flower one screams Wade Allison to me

Referenced Post

Prompt -- 14. Bringing me flowers for no reason (w Wade Allison)

A/N: Here's another blurb from the 14 oddly romantic things blurb set. This one was literally so cute to write!!

Thanks for requesting this, hope you like it :)

Word Count: 768

Warning(s): stress (mainly about school), anxiety?, but other than that super fluffy as usual

Join my taglist :)

Finals week was coming up. The past two days have consisted of the following three things; making flash cards/study guides, studying, and stressing out about not being prepared enough. My life has just been a constant loop of hand cramps, headaches, and stress. My friends have told me that I tend to immerse myself into unhealthy habits when I get stressed out about exams or school in general. All I know is I need to pass these exams to get good grades and to be able to graduate so I can get a steady job and income to support myself. If I don’t see my friends or boyfriend for a few days while I study, or if I have a few sleepless nights, it won’t be the end of the world as long as I get everything done and pass these exams.

I know I have a ton of missed calls and messages from my friends and my boyfriend worrying about me, but I ignore them as I continue reviewing some chapter notes. Now that I think about it, the last time I even checked my phone was to check the time-- which was around 4 a.m., and it’s light out now, so I’m guessing I studied through the night again.

I throw my hair up into a messy bun and then rub at my eye that begins to twitch. I go to take a sip of my [fourth] coffee when I hear keys jingling in my door. I take a quick peek at the opening door to find my boyfriend Wade walking in. I give him a quick close lipped smile while mumbling out a barely coherent, “Hey,” and then bring my attention back to my study notes.

I hear a faint “Jesus a/n,” come from Wade before he disappears out of my peripheral vision.

A few minutes have passed of complete silence, so I look up in search of where my boyfriend went.

“Wade?” I called out.

“Yeah. I’m in the kitchen.” He responds back.

I find my coffee mug almost empty, so I decide to head into the kitchen to get a refill and see what Wade is up to.

I stop dead in my tracks and my heart bursts with love at the sight in front of me. Wade is standing in front of the kitchen island holding a beautiful bouquet of flowers in his hand and my favorite takeout all laid out on the counter next to him. He gives me a cheesy little grin that makes my heart soar even more.

“What’s all this for?” I beamed.

I see his cheeks turn the lightest shade of pink as a blush forms as he scratches the base of his neck. “Uh,” He stutters out before clearing his throat and continuing with much more conviction now, “You’ve been working really hard these past few days with your finals upcoming. And I know sometimes you can push yourself a little too hard and not even realize it… So I figured I would come over and try to take your mind off of everything for a little while.” His blush returns once more when he goes to add, “Oh.. and these flowers reminded me of you so I got them.. For you.”

Tears start to spring into the corners of my eyes at the thoughtfulness of this incredible man standing in front of me that I get to call my boyfriend.

He grows alarmed when he sees my tears and stammers out, “Oh, oh no don’t cry! Did I offend you? Do you not like the flowers?”

I let out a teary chuckle before responding, “No, these are happy tears.” I make my way over to him and immediately bring him into my arms. “And, I love the flowers. You don’t understand how much I needed this.”

I lift my head off of his chest and stare up into his eyes. I go on my tippy toes and pucker my lips to let him know what want. He responds by meeting my lips halfway into a short and sweet kiss. “Thank you,” I murmured. Another kiss. “I love you.”

He gives me one last kiss on my forehead before replying back, “I love you too.” He pulls away and gently nudges me toward the doorway.

“Alright, now go take a shower before you give Oscar the Grouch a run for his money.” He teases.

I playfully scoff before making my way out of the kitchen. I stop in the doorway and look back at Wade batting my eyelashes at him and ask, “Are you joining me?”

He grins back, “Oh, say less.”

Tagging a few people so this doesn't flop,,,

@heatherawoowoo @barzysandmarnersbitch @joelsfarabeee @joelfarabeezer @joelsfarabee @yungbeez @fratboyzegras @samsteel @rosesvioletshardy @matbarzls @matbarzys @gigissports @musiclove-12 @yungbezzer @turcsandzegras @iwantahockeyhimbo @jordiee95 @papacarter

[hinadoria]

Title: like nobody’s business

Author: hinadoria / Twitter: @bunniepunk / AO3: bunnypunk

Rating: Teen

Warnings: Mild amounts of swearing

Summary: Shen Yuan had never known what to do about crying people, much less crying men asleep in his bed at ass o’clock in the middle of the night. God, if Jiu-ge knew about this, Shen Yuan would be six feet under. No, he’d be yeeted directly into hell’s abyss. Arguably though, this was all Jiu-ge’s fault.

AO3: Link

It started when his old roommate Shang Qinghua decided to get hitched at Shen Yuan’s 25th birthday party. Disregarding the fact that it was his birthday party in his apartment that he was paying for (Shang Qinghua was only there to keep an eye on him at Jiu-ge’s ever insistent demands), an increasingly hammered Shang Qinghua had decided it was the perfect time to propose to his disappointingly sober boyfriend.

“My LORd, have yOU EvEr ThoughT about Getting HitchED?!” he shouted in Mobei-Jun’s face. Shen Yuan saw the wince on Mobei-Jun’s face before he could smooth it away. Airplane-Bro had that effect on people. Even his boyfriend was no exception.

However, Mobei-Jun had silently pulled the biggest ring Shen Yuan had ever seen out of his pocket like it was a dimension to worlds unknown. Shang Qinghua yanked it out of his grasp, put it on, and immediately started sobbing loudly in his boyfriend's arms, effectively ruining the atmosphere.

If it wasn’t because Shen Yuan was already secretly plotting to escape to his room, he might have been significantly more miffed at this sequence of events.

After all, he had never been one for big, lavish events like a formal birthday party. He’d much rather spend it in the comfort of his room, maybe playing videogames with a few close friends. However, Jiu-ge had insisted, in that stubborn way of his, taking no arguments. As a result, Shen Yuan wasn’t sure he even knew half the people at his own party.

This all didn’t mean he was completely free of indignation, however. Shen Yuan cleared his throat pointedly, but was ignored by both the affectionate couple and the crowd of people politely applauding.

It was a testament to Mobei-Jun’s excitement, if he was a man that felt such emotions, that he leaped up onto the table, which creaked dangerously with his weight.

“I’d like to thank my dear friends and my soon-to-be best man who supported me through this time. Whom I wouldn’t have met without Shen Yuan’s recommendation to work at Cang Qiong’s internship program under Shen Jiu. So a heartfelt thanks to them both,” Mobei-Jun proclaimed.

The attention of the party turned to its host, who began to turn hot under all the attention.

Damn, it wasn’t as if he was Mother Teresa.

He had simply wanted to stop hearing Jiu-ge’s nagging complaints about a lack of competent interns at his company. And he knew that Airplane-bro’s boyfriend was just about to graduate. It was simple math.

Either way, he had to resolve this situation before Mobei-Jun broke the table or worse, made him give a speech. He quickly grabbed an abandoned glass from the table and raised it high. With raucous cheer, the party returned to full swing, and Shen Yuan strategically retreated to his bedroom.

The next day, Shang Qinghua had all but been moved out of his apartment (Mobei-Jun worked fast and efficiently. Shen Yuan had been begrudgingly impressed). In the midst of his soporific haze, a loud banging came from his front door. Reluctant to get up, Shen Yuan nevertheless used every last bit of his willpower to do so. When he opened the door however, he immediately found himself in deep regret.

A pale Jiu-ge, like Bloody Mary summoned from a dirty elementary school bathroom mirror, stood at his door, foot tapping a mile a minute. He stormed past Shen Yuan into his apartment and curled his mouth in distaste at the mess.

“This apartment is no longer acceptable. I’ve put up with it until now, but this is the last straw. It is imperative that you move out immediately to a place not infested by the stench of the poor,” Jiu-ge demanded. Shen Yuan would never tell him it was probably the week-old ramen stewing on his kitchen counter.

“But I don’t want to, Jiu-ge, please!” he whined. Like most things regarding his older brother, would eventually yield, but would put up a valiant effort nonetheless. No one had the right to accuse him of being a pushover, after all.

Jiu-ge sat down at his oily counter with a sigh, hands flying up to bury themselves in his messy hair.

Shen Yuan immediately felt guilty.

His brother looked a lot less put-together than he usually was, now that he was looking more closely. His shirt was unbuttoned and his makeup was smudged, both facets of his appearance he usually controlled with meticulous determination.

“Please don’t fight me on this, A-Yuan.” His brother looked back at him, and Shen Yuan could see the weariness in his eyes.

“Is everything okay?” asked Shen Yuan. He tapped his fingers nervously.

“It will be,” Jiu-ge answered immediately as if he had expected this question. “Once I get a good night’s sleep.” Shen Yuan moved to sit by his brother.

“Mobei-Jun proposed to Shang Qinghua yesterday,” he offered. This made the crease between Jiu-ge’s brows deeper further.

“At your birthday party?”

“I know, I was shocked too!”

“Rude bastard. I knew nothing good could come out of that tight-knit group of rascals the company foisted on me.”

“Don’t be like that. I bet you secretly appreciate their help, big softie.” Shen Yuan poked at his brother’s cheek, and giggled when Jiu-ge pretended to bite at him. A small smile appeared on his brother’s face, and Shen Yuan rejoiced at the sight. He felt like he deserved an award for Best Brother of the Year.

“I suppose they suffice at times.” Jiu-ge wrinkled his nose like he had thought of something particularly disgusting. “Well. Almost all of them,” he huffed. He shook his head when Shen Yuan looked at him in question. But Best Brother of the Year did not do things half-heartedly.

“I know how to cheer you up even more,” Shen Yuan decided then and there.

That was how Shen Yuan found himself moved into the expensive nouveau-riche apartment complex next door to his brother on the third floor. All things considered, it wasn’t too bad. Jiu-ge was too busy to check up on him more than once a week in person, although the daily calls to his office phone were still a requirement.

Shen Yuan had always been a homebody, there was no denying that. As long as he could coop up in his room reading and editing trashy novels, he didn’t care for the particulars of time or place, even if leaving his apartment and chancing upon another human made him feel like Oscar the Grouch having been caught outside of his trash can and committing a crime.

The point was: it had all been going just fine and dandy, until one day a shout disrupted Shen Yuan from his editing of one of Airplane’s terribly written papapa scenes. He roughly yanked open his curtains, hearing a rip in the plush blue velvet. Whatever, what Jiu-ge didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him.

The scene which greeted him was one of darkness, which okay, he wasn’t quite expecting that but fine, it wasn’t the first time he had lost track of time doing this and that. Shivering, Shen Yuan stepped out onto his balcony and peered over the rails to see a very attractive, very drunk man holding a broken bottle of what looked like Xin Mo liquor.

“Shen Jiu, there you are, you fucking bastard. Fucking coward! What, too afraid to come and see your disgusting student Binghe on this beautiful night? You always thought you were above us mere mortals, didn’t you? I hope both sides of your pillow are always ice!”

Yikes, Shen Yuan thought privately.

This dude was hammered. Despite everything a laugh bubbled its way up his chest. He didn’t know his brother was so unpopular at work but with a sour face like his, he should’ve expected. Briefly, the thought of pretending to be his brother just to hear more of the entertaining insults crossed his mind, but before he could open his mouth the man, probably named Binghe, went on.

“I bet you think you wake up just looking like an angel descended from the heavens! Well let me tell you, scumbag, that I curse you and your descendents to always have shaky eyeliner! Let’s see you keep up that hoity-toity look and scream at me when you come into work looking like a clown!”

Shen Yuan covered his eyes in horror. Not his eyeliner! He had to look sharp for the ladies.

“I fixed that stupid assignment one million times! Your nitpicking doesn’t even make sense anymore, you blind geezer! Come down here, if you’re not a coward and I’ll show you ...” Binghe paused, looking like he was gonna hurl.

“Show me what? You can’t leave me hanging like that, I won’t be able to sleep!” Shen Yuan shouted out, against his better judgement. He had already been collecting Binghe’s flavored insults to use against that traitor Shang Qinghua next time he saw him.

Binghe looked back up, with what seemed like confusion in his eyes, though it could have just been bleary drunkenness. To Shen Yuan’s horror, it looked like Binghe had tears in his eyes.

“All I wanted was for Laoshi to acknowledge me,” Binghe sobbed out. At this point Shen Yuan had missed his chance to tell the poor man that his brother was out of town on a business trip, and that Binghe was shouting at a stranger. He felt something in his chest squeeze at Binghe’s watery puppy dog eyes.

“Why does everyone look down on me?” Binghe cried. “I try so hard, over and over but all you do is scorn me … again and again! What do I have to do, just tell me, and I’ll do it. Anything! Just …” At this point the boy was choking on his sobs. Shen Yuan felt something shattering. He found himself walking down the stairs. He was going to go down and fetch him before the police were called, that was all, he told himself.

By the time he arrived on the cold grass ready to coax the drunkard, he found him passed out, clutching the broken bottle so hard his hand was bleeding. Shen Yuan sucked in a sharp breath.

“Alright buddy, let’s get you warmed up,” Shen Yuan said as he pried the glass from Binghe’s hand and used all his strength to haul him up and to the elevator.

He got several strange looks as he dragged an unconscious man across the fancy lobby, but Shen Yuan just snorted and ignored them. The people here had sticks so far up their ass they were getting free prostate massages. Shen Yuan stifled his laughter at his own wit in Binghe’s dead weighted shoulder and got a few more strange looks by the lady in the elevator. Halfway to Shen Yuan’s room, Binghe woke up and stared at Shen Yuan like he was an alien.

He struggled a bit and whined, “Laoshi, please don’t dropkick me into the Panama Canal, I promise I’ll be a good boy.”

Shen Yuan laughed and patted Binghe’s hair. “Go back to sleep, rowdy boy. We’ll talk in the morning.” It probably wasn’t because of his words, but Binghe managed to walk a few steps on his own before becoming dead weight on Shen Yuan again. He felt the breath knocked out of him.

“For someone who’s such a crybaby, you sure are … heavy!” Shen Yuan panted as he managed to drag Binghe into his apartment and throw him onto his bed. He shoddily wrapped up Binghe’s bleeding hand with several bandages. Novels may have taught him a lot, but he had surprisingly little practical knowledge when faced with a gash like Binghe’s in reality.

The fatigue of the night finally caught up with him as he saw Binghe’s peaceful sleeping face and he barely managed to do his nightly routine before sliding into his bed next to the unconscious person.

Shen Yuan was just about to drift away into sleep until he heard sniffling coming from the other man and turned around to see Binghe crying in his sleep.

And so was his current dilemma. Shen Yuan had no idea how to handle crying people. He stared dumbly for a few moments before kicking himself to do something, anything!

Shen Yuan wouldn’t do this for any random stranger that came knocking to his door, but luckily he had gleaned several useful tidbits of information from Binghe’s drunken speech. For example, he was likely one of Jiu-ge’s new interns at the large Cang Qiong Company he worked at, under the Qing Jing subsidiary. Second, Jiu-ge seemed to be giving the poor boy an extremely hard time, and Shen Yuan knew better than anyone just how sharp his brother’s acerbic tongue could be. Shen Yuan felt mildly responsible for cleaning up his brother’s mess.

Also, Binghe was terribly cute. He reminded Shen Yuan of the little puppy he used to play with in childhood, named Bingbing, after his favorite actress.

It was a combination of these facts, or none of them, that ultimately made Shen Yuan do what he did next; wrap his arms around Binghe and gently stroke his hair, murmuring comforting words to him until he stopped crying.

Somewhere along the way he found himself asleep as well.

Binghe awoke from his drunken stupor sometime between ass and fuck o’clock in the morning. His hand was covered in messily wrapped bandages.

When he saw the face of the person fast asleep next to him, he flinched backwards so hard he almost fell out of the bed.

What did I do last night? He wailed miserably in his head. A worst case scenario flashed through his head, and he made sure that both of them were clothed before exhaling a sigh of relief. That was the last time he let Mobei-Jun get him drunk, bachelor party be damned.

The last thing he remembered was accepting a glass full of alcohol in the bar he’d been dragged to, but everything afterwards was a blur. He didn’t remember how he walked all the way to his boss’s nouveau riche apartment, and he certainly didn’t remember how he ended up in bed with the man he was most fearful of.

There was one thing Binghe knew with full certainty, however; he had to escape this apartment immediately before he lost his job or worse: his life.

He had barely turned around and registered vaguely that the apartment was a lot sloppier than he’d expected of his avaricious boss before a sleepy hum made him freeze in his tracks.

“Mmm… Binghe?”

Binghe froze. Shen Jiu had never called him by name, it was always something along the lines of “scum” or “lad”.

Filled with trepidation, he turned to face his boss against his better judgement.

A sleepy smile stretched its way across the face of the person in front of him just as the morning’s rays peeked through the rip in the curtains and fell across his face.

Angelic, Binghe’s mind vaguely registered. Maybe he hadn’t come to his boss’s apartment after all. Maybe he had died and entered a realm different than the one he’d been in. Maybe he was already in heaven.

The angel’s face scrunched up cutely at the offending rays across his face. He glanced at the curtains before letting out a forlorn sigh.

“Jiu-ge’s gonna kill me for that …” sighed the angel across from Binghe.

Jiu-ge? Who’s that, I’ll fight him so you never have a frown on your pretty face ever again, Binghe thought blearily.

Mr. Angel noticed he was awake and smiled a crooked smile.

“Good morning. You were drunk and screaming outside my window last night, so I thought I’d do a public service and take you in before you hurt yourself, “ the angel laughed nervously. “Binghe is your name, right?”

Binghe nodded, feeling like his body was not his own. Then he had a thought.

“Wait … how do you know?”

The angel’s lips thinned, looking like he was trying really hard not to laugh. Oh, that was not a good sign.

“Well … You dropped your name in the middle of shouting about how you wished your boss’s food was too salty, among other things …”

The wave of relief that was about to pass through Binghe at realizing this person was likely not his boss aborted itself as it was overtaken by sheer waves of mortification.

Binghe covered his face with his hands, letting out an ungodly groan of embarrassment.

“Binghe… I’m saying this for your own good.” Mr. Angel looked into Binghe’s eyes seriously. “Do you know how to use swear words?”

Binghe immediately pouted, feeling like he was being made fun of. He couldn’t find it in himself to be truly annoyed, however, at the angel’s bell-like peals of laughter smothered by his hand. It was such a stark contrast to his boss’s restrained expressions.

“Ah! I forgot to introduce myself. I’m Shen Yuan, Shen Jiu’s younger twin brother.”

And there was the horror again.

Just as Binghe was about to bid farewell to his short, inconsequential life, Shen Yuan continued chattering. “You’re lucky Jiu-ge’s out of town on a business trip, and that you weren’t actually serenading his window but mine. If he was here, I don’t know if I could have even stopped him from personally throwing you into a jail cell.”

Binghe felt like he had gotten off of a life-threatening roller coaster ride. Stiffly, he rose from the bed and bent ninety degrees into a bow.

“Thanking Shen Yuan for his kindness in rescuing this lowly one from his predicament!” Binghe grew so nervous he immediately started speaking as if he were in a period drama. “In order to repay my honorable benefactor, this one will prepare breakfast!” He rushed away before Shen Yuan could speak a single word.

Once Binghe found the kitchen, he allowed himself a mini-freakout session. He! Was in! His boss’s younger brother’s bed! And the younger brother was an angel! Even though Binghe was fairly certain nothing untoward had occurred between the two of them the night prior, he felt every inch of his nerves tingling. He was also fairly certain that any other person that lacked Shen Yuan’s generosity would have immediately called the police on him at the least.

This was the first time anyone had done something so selfless for his sake.

Unbidden, a flush streaked across his cheeks, and Binghe slapped at himself to get out of it. Shen Yuan was his benefactor, and it would be wrong to have indecent thoughts about someone so innocent. There may not be much Binghe was good at, as he had learned from his internship under Shen Jiu, but the least he could do was cook him a decent breakfast.

Shen Yuan was roused from his half-wakeful state by the smell of something good coming from the kitchen. Which was weird because last he checked, there was nothing in there but dust and half-eaten ramen. (Yes, he had a problem.)

Wait … Binghe!

It was a little belated, but the nagging voice in Shen Yuan’s head that sounded suspiciously like Jiu-ge berated himself for falling asleep again while a stranger was in his apartment. A cute stranger, but a stranger nonetheless.

Shen Yuan, the voice nagged. One of these days you’re going to get yourself murdered in cold blood …

Alright, shut up, you. No one wants to hear this in the early morning, Shen Yuan bickered back.

“Sir?” Binghe’s voice nervously called from the kitchen entrance.

Shen Yuan immediately relaxed back into what he thought was a cool pose.

“There’s no need for formalities, Binghe. After all, you’ve already slept in my bed.”

Binghe’s ears flushed red at his words, and he swayed back and forth like a maiden on the morning after her wedding night. Shen Yuan stopped this strange line of thinking once he realized how weird it was.

“I made you breakfast as a thank you for er… handling me last night,” Binghe said softly.

Well, that didn’t help his strange thoughts. The last conscious thought Shen Yuan had was that he’d better go and eat the poor shy guy’s food since he had made it already.

He didn’t recall getting up or sitting down at the kitchen table, but the next thing he knew he was staring down at an empty plate, stomach full of delicious food.

“I don’t know what to think. This is the first time this has happened to me.” It wasn’t, but Shen Yuan had always had a flair for the dramatic. “If you can cook so well, why are you wasting your time under my brother’s wing? You should go be a professional chef, and share this magic with the rest of the world.”

It wasn’t empty praise. Shen Yuan genuinely believed he’d be blessed if he could eat like this every day for the rest of his life. His terrible habit of crappy eating would be forever changed.

Binghe was so red he looked like a tomato.

Abruptly, the sounds of a phone ringing disrupted the nice atmosphere. Binghe’s face paled.

“Oh no, I left Mobei-Jun at the club last night. He must be wondering where I am. The bachelor party got kind of crazy.”

Hm? Mobei-Jun? Shen Yuan slapped his forehead in realization. Of course! Binghe was a part of Jiu-ge’s interns, of course he knew Mobei-Jun. Shen Yuan had no idea how he had failed to make that connection. He might even be the best man Mobei-Jun had mentioned, since he was pretty sure the third intern was a woman. Sha Hualing, he believed her name was?

Either way, Shen Yuan hadn’t realized he and Binghe were so closely connected. Besides, he hadn’t felt comfortable calling Binghe a stranger, now that they no longer were.

Maybe he’d get a chance to see Binghe in a tux at the wedding? That would be so cute! Of course, he’d have to help keep him away from the champagne, especially since Jiu-ge would also be there. That was a nightmare waiting to happen.

While Shen Yuan was off fantasizing, Binghe had gathered all his stuff and prepared to leave. He hovered nervously around the door.

Shen Yuan snapped out of it to bid him goodbye. Binghe smiled shyly.

“Maybe I’ll see you around again sometime?” he asked.

Shen Yuan hid a smile behind his hand, and adopted a lofty expression.

“This immortal does not often descend from his honorable peak. However, if fate wills it to be so, then so shall it be,” he said, imitating Binghe’s earlier style of speech.

Binghe laughed, but kept hovering near the door as if he was waiting for something.

“Alright, your friend must be wondering where you are. Go on, now.” A flash of disappointment crossed Binghe’s face, but he obediently left, looking back like a puppy several times as he did so.

It wasn’t until much later that Shen Yuan would realize he had forgotten to explain that he was friends with Shang Qinghua, and that they would likely see each other again at the wedding. By the time the wedding itself rolled around, it would prove to be an ordeal of its own.

But that would remain a story for another time.

[cakeandpi]

Parker!! spoilers abound

hm, so Harry (aka Lawyer) has been fired/let go and no one gave him the memo on it. Is his old job/boss going to be this episodes mark?

oof, Harry is bad at being subtle with his ‘okay look in [place]’ comm directions

ah okay so isn’t a legal firm that’s about representing their clients to the best of their ability. it’s a firm whose about smoothing bad things over for rich clients so that there’s little to no consequences.

“I remember when you wanted to change the world.”/“World did change. We just went along for the ride.” So the world changed the boss, the boss gave up on changing the world because he saw a way to profit from it and didn’t care that he hurt others along the way.

The way that car drove up onto the curve, I thought that was Sophie in a big hurry at first. (I would have thought Parker but there wasn’t enough time for her to crack the safe, get to the relevant files, get out, and then drive there.) But no, it’s Maxwell’s thugs because the man holds a grudge apparently. So I’m going to guess he’s going to be the season big bad? Or is he just a 2-episode bad guy and we’ll find out who the real big bad is later?

Hardison: listing various problems on various international efforts he’s helping with Eliot: let’s make this a restaurant metaphor Hardison: *very much regretting ever buying Eliot that brewpub*

Nuts and bolts about bad guy details

Also that bit about Hardison being distracted by problems is definitely a distraction, there’s no way he’d pause on making sure their safehouse was secure

Eliot is not so much pissed as insulted that the world is at the point of advertising the corruption rather than him needing to beat it out of someone.

drone!!

*snort* eliot's usually the grouchy one, and he’s carrying a trashcan right now. there’s no way hardison doesn’t make some oscar the grouch joke once he sees that.

“It’s like you never stopped.”/“Yeah. Quite the act.” Sophie slows down at Hardison’s comment, then sighs and sits. She’s finding this tiring now. Is it because she’s out of practice? Or because after so many years of retirement, her hearts not in it anymore? And Hardison notices. He doesn’t say anything concrete immediately, because Sophie hasn’t really elaborated on what’s going on with her. When she does - it’s her grief, and how its affecting her grift now - there’s this concern in Hardison’s face. There’s absolutely going to be a meeting between the OT3 about how to straddle not straining Sophie too much and not babying her should she stay on for another job after this.

“But I can’t work forever, can I?” There’s a defeated tone to this, and it’s true - Sophie’s just human, one day she too will pass on. Her grief for Nate (and how being back with the team keeps reopening that wound) is coloring her view on this for sure. (Did Nate work himself to death?) It’s also, very distantly, a remark on the OT3 - they too can’t work forever. They were Sophie’s and Nate’s proteges. And it’s not that the OT3 doesn’t have anything in place if they go down - they’ve got small teams running all over the world. But they don’t have their own personal proteges. Harry’s a decent start, but they’ll need to recruit and open up their circle to at least one, maybe two more before they’re ready to retire. Before they, too, burn too hot for too long.

“You hear that? That’s a very distinctive sound.” YES

Another Basil & Brick truck! This one has.... empanadas, ropa vieja, sancocho, and I think the last one is yuca frita. Mm, yuca fries.

BREANNA!!!

Parker! Taught Breanna to tail people! (Hardison in particular?) When she was 11! Wait does that mean Parker’s met Nana?! Also Parker is so smug and satisfied that Breanna paid attention to her lessons.

“I teach every kid I meet how to do crime.” <3 be gay do crime

This is a big ‘I’m telling mom!’ argument and I love it, especially the “I think she’s napping” LMAO

“How you saved Eliot’s life all those times” Oh man Hardison is sleeping on the metaphorical couch tonight. But also I need to come back to this later because honestly and really? Hardison has - as part of a group team effort - saved Eliot’s life from himself. By giving him a way to work through his anger issues, by caring for him, by showing Eliot he’s needed and that he’s more than just a hitter. The team saved Eliot’s life. (And there’s probably a bunch of erasing digital trails/etc where Hardison did more directly save Eliot’s life but that's besides the point.)

“But hacking’s kind of old school anyway.” And as she goes on, Eliot goes from aggrieved to ‘oh, a new best friend’ because now he has someone to help him annoy Hardison.

Parker pulls Hardison into a side room (by his ear, but he’s not protesting in pain so that’s got to be just for show). And then pushes him up against the wall and Hardison is like ‘okay whatever lecture is coming can it not be like this?’ If it weren’t for the glass walls that’d be some makeout stuff right here.

LOL at Parker’s standard for a ‘normal’ person being ‘uses Uber, pays taxes, and has a birth certificate’.

“Wait is this like that time in Paris?” I... don’t remember an episode set in Paris with a robot and explosions so this must be during the time skip. And - “... but you didn’t want to hurt Eliot’s feelings so you secretly wanted us to agree.” I’m going to scream if there’s no confirmed ot3 by the end of the season. And cry. And read a whole bunch of fic.

Look at these two being honest with each and communicating and respecting each others opinions, they’ve grown so much from pretzel metaphors.

“You’re not mad. You did the Picard tug.”/“I am mad.“/“Did the tug. You know I like that.” Parker might be mad (at Hardison? Breanna? Both?) but not so much that she’s completely shutting out Hardison, giving him a nonverbal signal that she’s not pissed, just needs some time to be upset before everything’s okay.

“One. Job.” Parker says. And we the viewers know it’ll be more than one. But really what that means by now is that this is an audition. Parker may have taught Breanna some things, but now Breanna has to show that they do better with her rather than without, that she’s an asset and not a liability or dead weight.

I laughed so hard that because this shit’s illegal, there’s no cutting corners on the paperwork.

“And you didn’t get tortured.”/“Not this time.” I can’t tell if Eliot wants Harry to get a little bit tortured or if he’s just reminding Harry that this time around people were in a good mood and showing off.

Breanna stops herself before suggesting something, and Hardison, for all that he isn’t delighted at her presence and protested her being here, encourages her to speak up. If she’s going to be part of the team, even for one job, she’s part of the team and that means speaking up and throwing ideas out there for others to bounce around, even if it winds up being a football that can’t be dribbled.

OT3 TEAM JUST GOT DUBBED ‘DRILL TEAM’. (why is that also somehow a dirty joke i’m dying here)

Oh one of the baddies is a Com4r4t fan... oh wait no this is the beginning of a plan backfiring.

Aww Breanna is so proud of what she’s done! It’s very much like season 1 Hardison. So Sophie and Hardison go to do their own thing, only that means the baddies are here to talk to Breanna and she doesn’t have backup.

THE 'LET ME GET MY BOSS’ THE SPIN AROUND AND THE ‘WHY ARE YOU BOTHERING MY STAFF’ I LOVE BREANNA.

“I’m your neighbor who runs a business built on discretion.” This is going to go very badly depending on how Breanna plays this. At least she gets the earbud in to call for help!

Another Brick&Basil truck! Etoufee and jambalaya, dammit eliot stop choosing delicious food to advertise. 

“I monkey-shamed the DJ” I. Love. Her. Also Sophie’s already read Breanna as having the skills to just need general guidelines for an impromptu grift rather than needing to be fed specific lines.

“Okay here’s the thing.” And there’s a pause, we’re thinking he’s about to come down real hard on Breanna, and then we get “I love Com4r4t.” he is a fanboy I guessed it right!! And then he does go through with the threat, but not as a ‘cancel it or die’ sort of threat, but a ‘if i’m disappointed you die’ way.

Breanna nails the impromptu grift though she’s understandably a bit shaken by the threat at the end. (What newcomer wouldn’t be?) But the threat is what pushes Parker into deciding Breanna should go home ASAP. This is Hardison’s family, from before the team, and Parker isn’t about to risk messing that up. If she pushes for Breanna to stay when Hardison doesn’t want Breanna to, and something goes wrong? Parker would never, ever forgive herself.

But as Sophie has pointed out, they’ve all been out of their depth at one point or another. That doesn’t mean that someone should be sent packing.

Lmao Eliot being possessive of the drill.

“Then you ain’t got no more problems ever again.” There’s a certain sense of morbid humor with the team, one that’s both necessary but also a reality. They deal with this level of danger on a semi-regular basis. Harry just hasn’t caught up to that fact yet.

I have a feeling this particular baddie is going to end up dead for managing to drive a 40% cut.

“I’m just saying dude.” I love that Eliot and Hardison don’t have to rehash their entire arguments anymore unless they’re really enjoying themselves, that they can just be all ‘you know I’ve said my piece’.

“Don’t get distracted by the side gig.”/“Is it a side gig?” For all that the team has been their main focus for so long, for all that they all have side projects and gigs, this has been eating up more and more of Hardison’s time. What I thought was him pretending to be distracted earlier may have been a real distraction. And Eliot’s noticed, and he’s noticed that Hardison hasn’t noticed, that Hardison needs to make a choice here.

“In our line of work, you’re one of the best. But in that line of work you’re the only one, man.” Eliot has a soft smile at the end of that, and it's a bit painful, even as I saw it coming, to hear Eliot suggest that Hardison begin to step away from the team’s day to day.

“It’s okay to grow up, to realize you’re not the person you used to be.” None of them are the person they used to be. Not Sophie, not Parker, not Hardison, and certainly not Eliot. They can see that in each other if not in themselves. (Eliot, being the most grounded of all of them, already knew he’d changed eight years ago.)

“You never grew up.”/“Yeah. I achieved perfection pretty early, huh?” Even as Eliot’s the most grounded, even though he’s the one saying that there’s no one else that could fill Hardison’s role in that other work, the idea that Hardison might actually choose to step away from the team is too raw to handle without turning to humor.

Harry’s a bit jumpy, but he’s learning to play it off. I like that he’s a very different character from Nate, that it’s not his anger or ego driving him so much as a desire to make restitution.

And a “Dammit Hardison”

Ooh, Eliot’s in the vents too, just in time to help Parker. (She doubtless has her beloved taser but that would take time away from getting into the vault.)

“I smell lasers” Ahahahahaha

“You’re going to compare me to Eliot right now?” (’over the comms, where others who aren’t Eliot can hear?’ Hardison did not say out loud.)

ouch, okay, Hardison hurting his back like that might be what actually makes him choose the other gig over the team, or at what makes him take a little vacation so he can heal from that. (back injuries are nothing to play around with!)

how did Maxwell get past Eliot? but it’s all good, Eliot’s right behind to disarm him. And Parker’s been doing her hitting lessons, she didn’t even need a taser or to stab anyone!

Oh Harry, the bomb will be used, it’s just not time yet.

New Orleans gumbo is its own food group.

Okay so Hardison’s done a lot of work getting this place in order... WAIT IS THAT A PUNCHING BAG? That’s a punching bag! It might not be the love-letter the brewpub was but it’s definitely a thing added specifically for Eliot.

Oh no, Eliot might realize what Hardison’s doing with this, but Parker hasn’t caught up yet that Hardison’s going to be taking a break from the team.

Parker’s blindsided by this, and she’s upset, but she’s not mad because why didn’t she see this coming she should have seen it, so she leaves to deal with her emotions alone. Hardison follows, naturally, she knew he would, but she can’t face him because then he’ll see her crying, and Parker doesn’t do emotions easily. She’s torn between wanting him to help people and wanting to be with him (and she can’t go with him, she needs to be helping people too).

And Parker doesn’t want Breanna there without Hardison. Again because it’d put Hardison’s family in danger and that’s a step too far for Parker if Hardison doesn’t okay it. And also because with Hardison leaving, Breanna’s just going to be reminders of what Parker’s missing. And Breanna doesn’t have Hardison’s skillset, can’t fill his shoes - not that she should but she can’t, and Parker, I think, is already mentally preparing herself to go it alone again. Because if this job needs Hardison so bad, then surely Eliot’s got some project that needs his specific attention, and it was just one job for Breanna, and Sophie’s been adamant that this is one last job for her, and Harry’s still new and will probably decide to do his own thing given time to think... I think that’s where her brain is at, at least for the next thirty seconds, before she catches up with herself and realizes that more like the time she busted her leg than the team dissolving around her. (This kind of went weird places but that’s stream of thought for me)

And as they come back in Parker’s already cheering up some, because that wave of despair has already blown over. Yeah, she’s not a parent, but she’s good at teaching when she tries.

“It could be a reunion tour.”/“No. I’m retired.” It’s very different from Nate’s old protestations. He was not a thief. Whereas with Sophie it’s not ready. And while they all point out that she’s been happier while doing cons, that they could use the help, it’s not forceful or overpowering. It’s still Sophie’s decision. They’re not going to make her house their new base and taunt her with it; they’re not the sort of people who’d do that anymore, and anyway that’d be cruel instead of a fun sort of goading.

And because they give Sophie space to make a decision, while she doesn’t want to make a long-term commitment, she’s willing to take on ‘just a few more’.

[youllneverknowrac]

Oscar Diaz-Snow Cone Exchange

Leave a request!

For @jeyramarie

You were laying out on your stomach underneath the sun, your white bikini top untied as you work on getting a tan.

“Can you go buy me a snow cone papi? Please.” You ask as you turn your head over to look at Oscar who was sitting down next to you on his own towel, ice cooler next to him filled with beer,water, and some snacks.

“I asked you if you wanted one when we first got here baby” He groans,”It’s like a five minute walk.”

“I know but I didn’t want it then.” You pout as you reach behind to tie the top securely,”I’m so hot.” You complain as you flip over to work on your front side now,”Pleeeease.”

“Fine, I’m going.” He huffs as he stands up, wiping his swim trunks off and putting his slides on.

“Yay! You’re the best!” You cheer in victory, Oscar grumbling to himself as he grabs his wallet. Not saying anything before he walks off.

“Cherry! Or watermelon!” You shout after him, grinning to yourself as you get comfortable on the towel, your eyes closing underneath your sunglasses.

~

“Here.” You hear Oscar say as he takes a seat again, his legs stretched out in front of him.

“Thank you.” You smile and sit up, crawling over to his towel and taking the bright red cone from him.

“Hmh.” Oscar mumbles, letting you lay in between his legs and lean back on his chest.

“Be grumpy. I don’t care, I’m going to enjoy this no matter what.” You tease and give his cheek a quick kiss,”Oscar the grouch.” You giggle against his face before bringing the small treat to your mouth, taking a chunk out of it before you feel it smash into your face. Oscar taking it from your hands now and smearing it all over your forehead,neck, and chest. Your white top now light pink in some spots. You don’t even try to stop the actions because you’re too shocked to move, not expecting him to do that.

“Keep talking shit mami!” Oscar laughs as he pulls away from your body and runs out to the water to get away from you.

“I’m going to kill you!” You shout as you throw your sun glasses off and take off after him, him being faster at anything athletic so he was already making his way out into the water,”Come here!”

“Qué?! I can’t hear you!” He calls back amusingly, the water getting to his chest now,”You’re going to have to come over here ma!”

“You know I don’t like going out that far!” You reply,”Just wait!” You threaten as you turn you back to him and kneel down, using the water to wipe off the remains of the sticky syrup.

Your fixing to start walking back out of the water again when Oscar grabs you from behind, picking you up and acting like he was going to dunk you into the salty water.

“No! Put me down!”You shout, trying to get out of his grasp,”Oscar!” You cry when he finally sets you down,”I hate you.”

“Yeah?” He smirks, reaching out for you again.

“Stop!” You laugh as you splash water on him,”You ruined my snow cone, asshole! I really wanted to eat it.”

“Aye next time don’t act like a spoiled princesa.” He chuckles as a small wave comes, the two of you staying steady as it passes.

“You can’t spoil me our whole relationship and then suddenly expect me not to act like one.” You retort and hold your hand out for him to take you back to shore,”Besides you should be use to this by now papi. If you don’t like it, quit doing it so often.” You giggle

“Oh? So you want me to stop?” He asks, taking your hand in his and leading you through the water and mushy wet sand.

“Oh? Do you want me to stop cooking for you? Do you want me to stop doing your laundry? Do you want me to stop sucking your dick?” You retort

“Aye! Don’t take it that far.” He says and pulls you to his chest,”I’m just playing nena, you don’t gotta be so cold.” He mutters, as he stares down into your eyes.

“Then say you’re sorry.” You smile, standing up on you tiptoes to graze your noses together.

“Sorry.” He mumbles quietly, a few moments later.

“Can’t hear you.” You smile

“I’m sorry.” He says a bit louder, letting his head fall back in annoyance.

“That’s what I thought.” You say and pull his head back so you can give him a proper kiss.

“Can you suck it on the way home then?” He asks nonchalantly

“Ew!” You say and slap his chest,”No. it’s gonna taste like fucking sand.” You say and purse your lips in thought,”I’ll do it tonight if you go get me another snow cone though.”

“Done!” Oscar says and let’s go of you, running off to grab his wallet and head back to the the stand.

You laugh and shake your head as you watch him run off in that direction, walking back to the towels and deciding to lay out again. Oscar returning a short while later with a new snow cone and goofy grin, already excited for what’s to come when you guy’s get home.

[threeconsecutivefs]

Heather: Daichi x Reader

Ooh, first song fic.  Man i have like five drafts in store, why am I making another one.  

Summary:  You’ve been in love with Daichi since your third year, but the love is unreciprocated.  Things go south and you’re left alone.

Warnings: Angsty, jealousy? hell yeah.  Like, one curse word.

Notes:  I think it’s gender neutral.  If it’s not, just tell me!  Also, there are weird things in the midst of them.  Don’t want you to get too sad :)

(I want to just sit in his lap and be embraced by all of his 4 thicc limbs... no more, no less.)

Word Count: 1.8K words, 9.4 characters.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

╔═══*.·:·.✧    ✦    ✧.·:·.*═══╗

I still remember

Third of December

Me in your sweater

You said it looked better

On me, than it did you

╚═══*.·:·.✧    ✦    ✧.·:·.*═══╝

“(Y/N), aren’t you cold?”  Daichi asked as we walked home one autumn evening as he began to slide his bag off.  “Where’s your coat?” 

“I didn’t think practice would go on for so long, Daichi.  If I did, I would have definitely brought a sweater.  And before you say I should have gone home, I... kinda got mesmerized by your practice.”  I smiled softly at him with my arms holding each other.

“Here,” He took his team jacket off and draped it upon my body. “I’ll walk you back to your place.  You can give it back to me when we get there.”

I blushed and grinned while sliding my arms through the jacket.  It was already warm, and I could have just fell asleep in the middle of the road.  The jacket should have smelled sweaty, but in reality, it smelled really nice.

“It looks really good on you,”  He smiled down on me as he patted my head. “Better than it does on me if I do say so myself.”

Only if you knew

How much I liked you

I know he doesn’t see me the way I see him because it’s blatantly obvious when I see him look at her.

╔═══*.·:·.✧    ✦    ✧.·:·.*═══╗

But I watch your eyes, as she

Walks by

What a sight for

Sore eyes

Brighter than a

Blue sky

She's got you

Mesmerized

While I die

╚═══*.·:·.✧    ✦    ✧.·:·.*═══╝

“Kageyama and Hinata are really getting better and better every pra-”  He paused and stared at the doorway, and none other than Yui Michimiya, the girl who has him smiling whenever she walks by.  As he moseys on over to her, I can’t help to feel a twinge of sadness.  He’ll drop everything for her.  She likes him too.  From the way she gets flustered around him or connects with him through volleyball,  it’s as plain as daylight.

I tuck my head into my arms because he likes her, and she likes him.  It’s the perfect scenario.  But slowly inside, I can’t help but wish to be in her place.

╔═══*.·:·.✧    ✦    ✧.·:·.*═══╗

Why would you ever kiss me?

I'm not even half, as pretty

You gave her your sweater

It's just polyester, but you like her better

╚═══*.·:·.✧    ✦    ✧.·:·.*═══╝

Why should I feel so heartbroken?  It’s not like I’ve ever been an option.  She has charm, looks, and everything else I don’t.  Now when we go have lunch, she joins, and they both look 70 times happier.  He’s not as stern and she’s not as awkward anymore.  They suit each other.

We become friends, and the three of us hang out together all the time.  But now there’s only one sweater for two people.  I shouldn’t have expected the special treatment to continue.  The two of them become less flustered around each other as their chemistry continues to grow.  It was only a matter of time before it was them on the bike and me in the sidecar.  (A/N: This is giving me Hagrid’s motorbike vibes, and now I can’t stop laughing.)

“Michimiya, are you chilly?” Daichi asks in his deep and caring voice as he slides his jacket off of his shoulders.  “You should have dressed warmly today, it’s barely even 50 ºF(10 ºC).”

“I’ll be fine!  Won’t you be cold too? I don’t want you catching a cold before your practice game tomorrow”  She looks up at him and smiles, but as a breeze slowly makes its way through us, she shivers.  

He covers her with his jacket, zippering it up so she can’t move her arms.  As she stomps her foot in fake frustration.  “Don’t worry about me, I’ll just jog home so I can keep myself warm.”  He grins and grabs the sleeves of the jacket as he drags her off into the distance. 

I stand there, watching the two as they run around and laugh, like a mother watching her child run off with a friend at the playground.  After spacing out for a moment, I sprint to catch up with them.

They reach her house, and they bid their goodbyes, but when she asks about his jacket, he tells her she can keep it.

I stand across the street, watching the scene play down as I begin to amble back home.  He was so much kinder to her.  Letting her keep his jacket hurt more than it should have.  I tell myself that it’s just an act of kindness, no more, no less, but deep down, I know otherwise.

Wish I were Heather

╔═══*.·:·.✧    ✦    ✧.·:·.*═══╗

Watch as she stands with

Her holding your hand

Put your arm 'round her shoulder

Now I'm getting colder

╚═══*.·:·.✧    ✦    ✧.·:·.*═══╝

Two years later, they begin dating.  There was never a time they were apart.  Daichi in the police academy and Yui in the local college.  We shared an apartment, two rooms, one for me, one for them.  On Fridays, we watched movies– or more like I watched movies.  They watched each other.  Sitting on the couch with your arm resting on her shoulders and her hand in yours.  I sat on the ottoman at the side of the room.  If he was happy, so was I, no matter how much I yearned to be in her place.

╔═══*.·:·.✧    ✦    ✧.·:·.*═══╗

But how could I hate her?

She's such an angel

But then again, kinda

Wish she were dead, as she

╚═══*.·:·.✧    ✦    ✧.·:·.*═══╝

 She’s wonderful in every way.  Her smile, her laugh, what’s not to like.  They’re in love, and I can’t do anything about it.  She super sweet and caring to me, even though we don’t talk all too much.  I can’t help but smile around her too, but at the same time, I wish she was dead.

“(Y/N)?  You there?” Daichi calls through my door.  “Lunch is ready if you’re hungry.” He knocks on the door again.

Curled up in my bed, I smile at the sound of his voice while tears roll down my face.  I sit up and wipe the tears off my face, but when I try to reply, I’m barely able to choke out my words to him, “Mmhmm... I’m coming.”  Gazing at the rain dripping down the window, I sniffle and get up in order to go eat, but before I can do that, Daichi comes in, only to see me looking miserable

“Hey, hey... are you ok?”  He questions, walking over to sit next to me on the bed. “You look like you’ve been crying for the past hour.  You never come out to spend time with us.” As he brings me closer to his chest, I can’t help but feel worse inside because it’s obvious that he sees this only as a platonic action.

“I really don’t want to talk about it,” I responded, pulling myself away from him.  Unfortunately, that triggers the inner dad in him and he continues to push me to tell him.

 “I don’t want to tell you!”

“It’ll make you feel better, bottling your emo-”

“OK FINE! Fine. I’ll tell you.”  I snap and stand up abruptly.  Daichi stares with wide eyes, taken aback by my sudden actions.

“I love you... So much.”  I plop on the floor, “And not like a platonic, ‘We’re friends, and we love each other as friends.’ kinda thing.  It’s gotten to the point where I can’t stop feeling hurt whenever you’re with her” Cue the frantic handwaving, “And I know you don’t feel the same way, it’s been obvious since our third year.  Wow...  heh... this felt really good to let out.”

Daichi is beyond stunned, almost as if he was told that he was going to a father.  I couldn’t help but laugh awkwardly at him.

“I- I... WHAT?”  His eyes were practically popping out of his head, and honestly, that was probably the best reaction he could have given me.  But as soon as he said that, he walked out of my room, and closed the door behind him.  

A couple of days passed, and he didn’t say much, even if I tried to crack a couple of jokes.  (Insert this face)

“I mean, it’s not like you need it more than Oscar the Grouch does” 

“Mmm”

I began to crumple even more because of this.  After a week, he had done enough for me to realize he didn’t want to talk to me.  Movie night?  Sitting with Yui in a passionate kiss.  Lunch?  A discussion of their day.  Hangouts?  I wasn’t invited.  If I chimed in, I was ignored.  

I might as well be on a show called, “What Not To Do When:  Confession Edition” 

(Gonna cut the song short here)

╔═══*.·:·.✧    ✦    ✧.·:·.*═══╗

Wish I were Heather

Wish I were Heather

╚═══*.·:·.✧    ✦    ✧.·:·.*═══╝

Fury flowed through my veins as I punched the pillow laying on the couch.  

“I WISH I WERE HER.  FREAKING PERFECT IN EVEN IF SHE FUCKS SOMETHING UP.  NO MATTER WHAT SHE DOES, IT’S WONDERFUL.  I TELL HIM ONE THING- GODDAMMIT.  GODDAMMIT, GODDAMMIT, GODDammit...”  My voice trailed off as I saw Daichi standing at the door.  With tears flowing down my face, I look at the man as he looks at me with the same face he did when I told him.  

“Why do you look at me like that?  Why is it that every time that we even remotely interact with each other you look at me like that?  It’s like you never expected this to happen!”  I wipe my tears with my sleeve and storm up to him. “Why isn’t it plain as day?  You EXPECT me to be perfectly fine after days- DAYS of you looking at me like a stranger and ignoring everything I say?  That’s not how I work, and you know that!  I told you I didn’t want to tell you, and you poked and prodded at me to tell you, and when I told you, you left.”  I weakly punched him in the chest. “I wish I were her.  I wish you would look at me like you do at her.  But that’s never going to happen because you’re infatuated by her.”

╔═══*.·:·.✧    ✦    ✧.·:·.*═══╗

Why would you ever kiss me?

I'm not even half as pretty

You gave her your sweater

It's just polyester, but you like her better

Wish I were

╚═══*.·:·.✧    ✦    ✧.·:·.*═══╝

“Why would you ever do that? There’s no reason for you to because all I am is a pebble beside you.  I don’t even exist at this point to you.  I wish I were-”  Daichi stepped out of the way to show her standing behind him.

“Yui.”

(A/N: I had no idea how to end thisssss.  I’m dying rn.)

(Masterlist) (Part 2)

[trashyswitch]

The Grumpy Ol' Bunny

Springtrap's physical body under the animatronic suit, is the biggest mystery to fill the animatronic's thoughts. It's so much a mystery, that Foxy and Freddy have tried to capture him to open him up and look. But whenever they try and get some answers, Springtrap scares them off with his creepy, grumpy nature.

Soon, Bonnie and Foxy join forces with Chica and Freddy to find out just what he is, and what his insides are truly made of without issues.

This idea sounds pervy, now that I think about it...but, it's not! I swear! It's just curiousity. It's like a couple kids breaking a toy of theirs, to figure out how it works. Only, this toy is alive, and an angry equivalent of Oscar the Grouch from Sesame Street. XD 

I would like to credit @fivecoins for inspiring me to write this fanfic. HI! 👋

*DISCLAIMER* A few cusses. That’s all though.

Springtrap is a very...strange being. He smells like mold, ashes and soap, and has quite a few holes in him. What his endoskeleton is made of, is also a mystery to the other animatronics. Why does the man have red knots on his ankles? Why is there red rope on his endoskeleton? Why is part of his ear missing? Is he hiding things in his body? What IS Springtrap? What they do know however, is his attitude. He's somewhat rude, has very little of a filter for his thoughts, and often comes across as a grumpy old man. Foxy would even say he's got the attitude of 'an old Janitor'.

But, that hasn't stopped him from trying to learn more about him.

Well actually...the truth is, it has...a lot...

But, not anymore! Foxy and Freddy had set up a trap to lure Springtrap over to them. Chica and Bonnie had joined as well, looking at the plan.

"I'll keep throwing stuff at the surrounding area and making noise to keep him interested." Chica offered.

"Okay. Try not to hit him. He'll only get angry if you hit him." Foxy told Chica.

"Right. We don't want that. Though if he does end up getting hit, we'll have to continue while he's angry." Chica replied.

"Right. Freddy?" Foxy pointed at Freddy.

"I'll grab him when he comes close." he told him.

"And Bonnie?" Foxy asked.

"I'll start investigating! I really wanna know." Bonnie explained.

"I'll help with the investigating too." Foxy added.

"Okay! Let's get this started-"

"What are you doing...?" Someone said behind them, interrupting Freddy. All 4 of the animatronics jumped and yelped in surprise. Foxy fell onto the ground, while Bonnie quickly got rid of the map.

"Hiiiii Springtrap, buddy old pal..." Chica greeted as un-awkwardly as possible, giving him light elbows to the his arm.

Springtrap narrowed his eyes. "Are all chickens idiots, or is it just you?" Springtrap asked.

Chica narrowed his eyes back at him, and decided to do the kidnapping himself. Chica picked up Springtrap and wrapped him into a big hug. "HUGS FOR THE GRUMPY BUNNY!" Chica declared.

Springtrap's eyes widened. "WHAT?!" Springtrap yelled, squirming around. "LET ME GO, YOU DUMBASS DUCK!" Springtrap yelled.

Freddy frowned. "Awww...I wanted to capture him." Freddy whined.

"you can hold him if you want." Chica told him, holding the animatronic out.

"Oh gosh...NO! DON'T YOU DARE! CHICA, PUT! ME! DOWN!" Springtrap yelled, squirming more and more frantically as Freddy walked up to Chica and Springtrap.

"Here you go. One salty Springtrap, coming your way." Freddy teased befre handing him over to Chica. Chica placed his cupcake down and grabbed onto him with his hands.

"Thank you Freddy" He replied. "Is this comfy for you?" Chica asked Springtrap.

Springtrap started squirming right away. "YOU'RE GONNA SQUEEZE MY ENDOSKELETON OUT OF MY BODY! LET GO OF ME RIGHT NOW!" Springtrap ordered.

"Wow! I don't think I ever realized that Springtrap's a toddler!" Chica reacted.

"I am NOT!" Springtrap shouted back.

"Hmm...giving me sass? That's definitely childish behaviour if I've ever saw it." Chica joked.

Freddy, Bonnie and Foxy were giggling and laughing at the funny scene in front of them.

"Now, to answering the burning questions going through all our heads: What are you even MADE of?!" Chica asked.

Upon hearing the question, Springtrap whined and threw himself backwards in annoyance. "Why are you guys OBSESSED WITH WHAT'S INSIDE OF ME?!" Springtrap shouted. (Pocket, the author of this fic, who's looked up tons of pictures on the subject: "SCIENCE!")

"Because it's so different compared to the rest of us! It's...foreign." Bonnie explained.

Springtrap let out a whiny cry. He was not in the mood for this!

"So first off: What does your skull look like?" Foxy asked, before poking the top of the bunny mask with his hook.

"It looks like a skull, alright?" Springtrap huffed.

Bonnie started looking around the suit for a button to remove the mask. But...there was no buttons. Nothing around to let it go. "There's no buttons anywhere." Bonnie commented. "Can I try pulling it off your he-"

"NO! DON'T YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT PULLING MY MASK OFF. I may be an animatronic, but I can STILL FEEL SOME THINGS!" Springtrap warned, growing worried and nervous that Bonnie was gonna try pulling the mask off.

"Okay! Okay, I won't!...I'll just look inside your mouth." Bonnie replied, before opening up the spring Bonnie jaw.

Upon looking inside, Springtrap had a purple skull, with a second mouth inside! "Hi." Springtrap spoke with the inner mouth.

Bonnie shrieked in surprise, closing the jaw and jumping back. "UM...Why is there a SECOND MOUTH?!" Bonnie asked. "And WHY IS YOUR ENDOSKELETON HEAD PURPLE?!" Bonnie asked.

"Purple? Seriously?!" Freddy asked, looking inside the animatronic mouth region. Sure enough, there was a bit of purple showing up inside the animatronic. "Whoa...That's not right." Freddy reacted.

Springtrap sighed. "It's a human skull. I was a human before I got trapped in this suit." Springtrap explained.

"OOooooohh..." all 4 animatronics reacted all at once.

"So you're a human animatronic?" Freddy clarified.

Springtrap sighed, but nodded. "Yes." he replied.

Chica lifted Springtrap up a little bit. He started looking at Springtrap's insides through all angles of the holes in the back of the suit. Springtrap awkwardly attempted to protest, not feeling very comfortable by how he was handling it, but also feeling thankful he wasn't getting hurt in any way.

"Lift him up more. I wanna check something out." Bonnie suggested. Chica nodded her head before lifting Springtrap up. Bonnie grabbed his ankle, and started checking out Springtrap's calf and foot. "Huh...your foot is covered with metal, but it looks like there could be a foot in here." Bonnie told them.

Springtrap threw his head back, annoyed by all this. "It's a boot. Of COURSE I had feet in here! But both of my feet shattered when the springlocks broke through them." Springtrap explained.

"Wait...did your body possess the suit after you died?" Chica asked.

Springtrap looked around with his eyes half open, growing bored as he was getting examined. "Uh huh." Springtrap replied.

"Wait a second...How did you know he died?" Bonnie asked, removing his one hand from Springtrap's cyborg foot.

"He got crushed by the machinery inside the suit. Of course that would kill a human!" Chica replied.

"She's right." Springtrap added in an uninterested tone.

"Huh..." Bonnie muttered. "Wait, you said you can feel some things, right?" Bonnie clarified.

Springtrap's eyes were beginning to close. "Yyyyyyup." Springtrap replied.

"Are you able to feel this?" Bonnie asked before poking the top of his foot.

Springtrap's eyes widened for a moment, as he was woken up by a poke to the foot. "Yup. You successfully woke me up." Springtrap replied.

"Okay. Are you able to feel this?" Bonnie asked, before lightly massaging his foot with one hand.

Most of Springtrap's body just melted at the touch. He let out an almost silent sigh as a small smile showed up on his lips. It felt amazing to feel a massage like that. "Mmmm hmmm...Just keep doin' that." Springtrap told him, leaning his head back as relaxation took over his body.

Freddy and Foxy observed the scene with curious eyes. They've never seen Springtrap so relaxed and content like this before! It was so new to them!

Bonnie's own face began to perk up into a curious smile as he continued to massage his foot. He moved his thumb closer to where the ball of Springtrap's foot could've been. He started pushing and wiggling into the spots under the toes, located on the ball of his foot. He started pushing underneath Springtrap's big toe, and worked his way to the middle of the ball grip.

Springtrap's mouth widened and showed off his teeth, and pulled his arms towards his chest a little. "Hehehe...Ohokay...cahahareful Bonnie, it tickles." Springtrap warned him casually, leaning his head against Chica's chest as a pillow.

"Tickles?!" Bonnie exclaimed, retreating his fingers.

"It tickles?" Foxy clarified.

"You're ticklish?!" Foxy exclaimed, unable to believe such a weird fact. Springtrap's eyes widened as he realized his horrifying mistake.

"Uh-Wait! I wouldn't say 'tickles' per say, I prefer the term 'sensitive'." Springtrap explained.

Bonnie rolled his eyes and laughed at the stupid attempt to cover it up. "Sensitive, ticklish, same difference." Bonnie replied before wiggling a single finger on the ball of his foot. Springtrap gulped and attempted to pull his foot away from Bonnie, but to no avail. Bonnie was too strong for him. So, he tried kicking him with the other foot. But the moment the other foot came flying towards the bunny, Bonnie would only temporarily switch feet and tickle the flying foot until it pulled away from him again.

Springtrap was stuck in a tickle trap. But he was determined to win. Springtrap tried to kick as hard as he can, and pull his foot away as quick as possible so he could lessen the tickles. But Bonnie ended up just dropping the bound left foot, and grabbed the kicking foot instead! The ghost tickles on his left foot were still making him giggle, and Bonnie was now tickling his right, dominant foot! He was losing the fight very quickly. Springtrap struggled to breath properly without silent giggles taking over, and his left foot was too weak to do much kicking damage to Bonnie.

"Chica! You're holding his upper body, right?" Foxy asked. Chica lifted him up the slightest bit, to show fox his hand positioning: On the sides of his chest. "Try tickling his armpits!" Foxy suggested. Chica's eyes widened as a small, eager smile grew onto his beak.

Springtrap's eyes widened in horror. "WAIT! NO, PLEHEASE DON'T! WHAT HAHAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS?! WHAHAT HAHAPPEHENED TO MASSAGEHES?!" Springtrap yelled, his laughter starting to show up the littlest bit more as his foot was tickled.

Eager to get him laughing a little more, Chica used both of his index fingers to tickle the inside of both of his armpits. This move would end up breaking the cyborg animatronic.

"NOHohohohoho! Hahahahahaha! Hahahahahands ohohohohoff!" Springtrap broke, giggling and squirming as 3 separate spots were tickled.

a huge smile spread onto Freddy's face as he heard Springtrap laugh for the very first time. He covered his excited smile with his bear paws. "Oho my gosh! Springtrap, the animatronic infamous for being a dick, can actually laugh! Am I dreaming? I must be dreaming!" Freddy reacted.

"If you're dreaming, we must be dreaming the same dream!" Chica added.

"Yohohohou guhuhuys ahahare ahanimatrohohonihics! Yohohou cahahahan't drehehehaham!" Springtrap told them through his giggles.

"Since when?! How do you know we can't dream?!" Bonnie asked with a smirk.

"Yohohohou're rohohohobohohots! Rohohobohots dohohon't dreheheam!" Springtrap replied.

"Well listen here, you uncultured cyborg! I'll have you know, that we in fact CAN dream! And we have very strange dreams!" Bonnie told him. "Well...at least I do..." Bonnie admitted.

"I do too!" Freddy admitted.

"I dreamt about a bunch of dinosaurs playing soccer!" Foxy admitted.

"I had a dream that a witch was giving rich people explosive money." Chica told them.

"I had a dream about a flooded kingdom, that needed a huge vacuum to suck the water out." Bonnie explained, stopping his fingers to let Springtrap breath a little.

Springtrap's giggles quickly died down. "Yohohou guhuys hahave the weheheheirdehehest dreheheams..." Springtrap admitted.

"You think? How about you?" Chica asked, stopping his fingers as well.

Springtrap took a moment to start properly breathing, before answering him. "Nohope. Not that weird. The weirdest dream I ever had, was about me running a farm, and all the farm animals kept shouting profanity's at me." Springtrap told him.

Foxy laughed at that. "That's kinda funny, actually. Just a bunch of chickens chasing you down and screaming: 'GIVE ME BACK MY EGGS BITCH!'" Foxy joked.

Springtrap laughed as well. "Yeah, or a horse just donkey kicking you from behind, and saying: "Sorry about that. Just wanted to make sure I can still kick your ass." Springtrap added. Chica laughed at the joke, as well as Freddy.

"But enough talk...Are you ticklish anywhere else besides the feet and the armpits?" Chica asked.

Springtrap's eyes widened at the mention of tickling, and his squirming started right back up again. "NO! No, I'm not. Why would I be ticklish anywhere else?" Springtrap reacted, attempting to fool them.

Chica giggled evilly. "You're not fooling anybody. Now come on-" Chica started tickling under his left armpit with his index finger, "Where else are you ticklish?" Chica asked. Springtrap squealed at the sudden ticklish feeling under his armpit, and continued to yelp and laugh as he squirmed away from the single, yellow finger. "Are you ticklish on the belly?" Chica asked, signalling for Freddy to come over and try tickling his belly. Freddy walked up, took a moment to 'crack' his fingers outwards, before wiggling his fingers teasily at the green-looking animatronic. Springtrap fell into a puddle of nervous giggles just from looking at the fingers, and looked away from them.

"I'm gonna take this as a 'yes'! I think someone has a very ticklish belly." Freddy replied, before looking around Springtrap's belly region.

"F-Freheheheddy, dohohon't! Plehehehease dohon't!" Springtrap begged. Holy crap...He wasn't even being tickled yet and he's already a giggly mess!

"He doesn't really have much of a stomach area..." Freddy explained, before reaching his index finger into the the open area above the hips. "But he DOES have a spinal spot right here-" Freddy poked the lower spine that showed itself in between the open area between the chest and the hips. Springtrap shrieked and fell into high-pitched laughter, that quickly began to die down. Freddy gasped and smiled at Chica. "Well what do ya know?! Jackpot!" Freddy declared.

"NOHO! NOT THERE! OH GOSH! NOT THE SPINE, NOT THE SPINE, GEHET AWAHAHAY FROHOHOM MEHEHEHEHEHE!" Springtrap begged loudly.

Despite the begging getting more frantic, Freddy kept going. He gently placed his finger on the spine, and wiggled his finger on it for only a couple seconds...

"AAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! STAHAHAHAHAP IHIHIHIHIHIHIT!" Springtrap shouted loudly! Freddy smirked, and wiggled his finger on the spine again. "HAHAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! GEHEHEHET AHAHAWAHAHAHAY FROHOHOHOM THEHEHEHEHEHEHEHERE! HAHAHAHAHEHEHEHEHEHE!" Springtrap howled as he kicked and squirmed as much as he possibly could.

Freddy removed his finger for good this time, and let the man breath. "Wow! I think that's your worst spot yet!" Chica reacted.

Springtrap was breathing somewhat heavily, trying to take as big of breaths as he could to make up for the oxygen he had lost. But despite the breathing struggles, Springtrap nodded his head.

Foxy really wanted a turn next. So, he walked up to Chica and looked around to see where else he may be ticklish. He knew that certain spots existed, and some were much worse than others. He wanted to make sure he chose a calm, more giggly kind of tickle spot. So, the fox attempted his neck. Foxy wiggled a finger onto the side of Springtrap's neck, just for a test run. Though the wiggling did spawn a couple little giggles and a little hand to push away, it didn't grant him the desired effect. So, Foxy went for another test spot: the ears.

The question that Foxy had, however, was if Springtrap could feel his bunny ears. So, Foxy tried running a finger up and down the front of the ears. "Can you feel this, Springtrap?" Foxy asked.

"Feel what?" Springtrap replied.

"My finger against your ear. I'm guessing you can't feel this?" Foxy clarified.

"Nope. My ears are separate from my head." Springtrap replied.

"Okay." Foxy reacted. Next, Foxy tried the back of the ears. "Can you feel the back of the ears being touched?" Foxy asked.

"No. I have no nerves up there." Springtrap replied.

Foxy nodded in understanding. Funnily enough, the words 'I have no nerves up there' stuck with Foxy for a few minutes. This was just enough time to help Foxy come up with a new theory. Foxy brought his fingers to the bottom of the ears, and scratched right at the base of the ears and the top of the skull.

To Foxy's surprise, Springtrap squealed and shook his head to try and shake the fingers off his ears. Foxy only went for the other ear however, and smiled widely when Springtrap broke into a fit of high-pitched giggles. "Hehehehehehehehehe! Ohohohokahahahahay, mahahahaybehehehe I cahahan feeheeheel sohohohomethihihihing ihihin thehehe ehehehehears..." Springtrap admitted.

"Hmmm...Good to know." Foxy reacted, continuing to scratch at the base of the ears. Springtrap attempted to remove his fingers with his hands, but Chica was way ahead of him: the evil animatronic chicken tickled his armpits everytime he lifted his arms! This caused his arms to crash back down, and his giggles to increase into laughter.

It was quite adorable for Freddy and the others to see Springtrap like this. Who knew such a grumpy animatronic like Springtrap, would end up hiding such an adorable side of himself? Turns out, Springtrap had lived his whole life as a human AND an animatronic, with this kind of side to him!

Chica seemed to be enjoying Springtrap's giggly side as well, as evident in her coos and teases. "Look at this cute little bunny we have in our grasp! So stuck! So trapped! Unable to do anything except for laugh, and squirm in our tight, tickly grasp!" Chica teased like a mother would to a bratty toddler.

Springtrap threw his head back and whined in between his giggles. "Nohohoho teheheheheasihihing! Plehehehease nohohoho teheheheheasihihihihing. Ihihihihi'm gohohohonna dihihihihihihie!" Springtrap begged.

"Oh wow! Not only can you grow flustered from a little teasing, you can also speak bullshit?! That's incredible!" Foxy reacted, pretending to be surprised as he only increased his scratches.

"HahahahaHAHAHAHA! FOHOHOHOXYHYHYHYHYHYHAHAHAHAHA! NOOOOHOHOHOHOHO! EEEEEEHEHE!" Springtrap shouted, growing more and more flustered the longer it went on.

"A man who can speak bullshit as fluently as you can, deserves a reward of even MORE tickles!" Foxy added. "Hey Bonnie! You wanna help out?" Foxy asked.

"I'd love to!" Bonnie replied as he lifted up Springtrap's foot again. Bonnie started wiggling his fingers everywhere he could reach on the single foot.

"NAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHA! NAHAHAHAHAT MYHYHYHYHY FEEHEHEHEHEHEHEET! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Springtrap squealed as much as he could.

"But why not? Your feet are such a fun spot to tickle! So many different spots to travel! Here-" Bonnie wiggled his finger on the inner arch. "Here," Freddy moved his wiggly finger to the outside of the foot. "Heeere-" Bonnie dragged his finger to the heel and started drawing circles. "Even here!" Freddy declared, wiggling his finger under his toes.

"BAAAHAHAHAHA! Hehehehehehe! NOOOHOHOHOHOHOHO! EEEEEEHEHEHAHAHAHA! NOHOHOT THE TOHOHOHOHOHOES!" Springtrap shouted, reacting differently to the different spots before squirming and squeezing his toes. No matter how much he tried to stop it however, Bonnie's finger was still able to wiggle its way in there, and tickle his toes back open! It was driving Springtrap insane that he couldn't do anything to stop his finger from tickling there.

Springtrap attempted to kick his foot again. But to Springtrap's surprise, Bonnie caught it! "Hey Freddy! There's a spare foot for you to tickle. You wanna take it?" Bonnie offered.

Freddy smiled. "Why I'd love to!" he replied. Freddy picked up the foot, and wiggled a couple fingers on Springtrap's foot.

"OOOOOHOHO NOOOHOHOHOHOHO! HAHAHAHAHAHA! FREHEHEHEDDYHYHYHYHY STAHAHAHAP!" Springtrap begged.

"I barely started!" Freddy replied.

"Here, Freddy. I'll stop this foot for a bit, so you can get a turn." Foxy offered.

"Aww! Thank you Foxy." Freddy thanked before wiggling his fingers on Springtrap's inner arch.

"HehehEHEHEHEHEY! COHOHOME OHOHOHOHON!" Springtrap laughed.

"Come on? Come on what? Come on, that's all you got?" Freddy asked.

"NOHOHOHO! THAHAHAT'S NOHOHOT WHAHAHAHAT IHIHI MEHEHEANT!" Springtrap yelled, hoping and praying he wouldn't make the tickling worse.

"How dare you question my ability to tickle! I'll show you!" Freddy declared. He wiggled all 4 of his fingers all over the foot, where he could reach. Springtrap screamed and fell into a huge pile of cackles. "There! Having regrets yet?" Freddy asked, becoming unusually competitive.

Springtrap only continued to cackle and add squeals and snorts in between! The animatronic was DYING and he couldn't stop his own demise! "IHIHIHI'M SAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! SAHAHAHARRYYYYHYHY! STAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Springtrap shouted. The animatronic couldn't even finish his words at this point! All he could do, was laugh and squirm in Chica's grasp. But to Springtrap's surprise, he didn't feel tired! Like, at all!

While Springtrap tried to process that thought, Chica had noticed his struggle to properly speak. So, she spoke up herself. "Alright Freddy...let's give him a break." Chica advised.

"But I didn't get very long to tickle him!" Freddy reacted.

"You put that upon yourself. The more you tickle him, the less time you get." Chica told him. Freddy frowned, but stopped his fingers to let him breath.

Springtrap managed to calm himself down quite quickly, and soon realized something that explained everything: He's an animatronic now! He didn't need to rely on oxygen to live anymore!

"Springtrap? Are you okay?" Chica asked.

Springtrap snapped himself out of his thoughts. "I'm alright...I'm actually fine!...I guess I don't need to breath, which is nice to be honest." Springtrap explained. "I guess this also means my lungs are useless." Springtrap added.

"What is it like being able to breath?" Foxy asked.

Springtrap looked over at him and leaned his chin against his hand. "It's...an automatic thing my body can do by itself. It's like having 2 balloons in my body that fill with air and let the air out." Springtrap explained.

"So if you don't need to use your 'lungs' anymore..."

"I can keep tickling you without any problems!" Freddy declared before resuming his tickling fingers.

"BAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! NOHOHOT MYHYHY FEEHEHEHEHEET! AHAHANYWHEHEHERE BUHUHUT THEHEHEHEHEHERE!" Springtrap shouted at him.

"But why?" Freddy asked, stopping his fingers.

"Be-behehecause ihihi'm nahahat aha fahahan ohohof beheheihing tihihickled ohohon myhy feehehehet." Springtrap told him.

"Well, where DO you like being tickled?" Freddy asked.

Springtrap couldn't help the wide, wobbly grin that filled his face.

"Uuuuuuhhh..." Springtrap muttered, looking away awkwardly. Freddy waited for a few minutes to see if he would answer him. "My..." Springtrap attempted to get it out, but it was hard to.

Freddy smirked as he rubbed his chin. "Am I gonna have to guess?" Freddy asked, wiggling his fingers eagerly. Springtrap giggled and shook his head. "Fihihine! There is a body part that everyone has, except for Chica." Springtrap hinted.

All of the animatronics (apart from Springtrap) looked around at the differences between them and Chica.

"A tail?" Bonnie guessed.

Springtrap shook his head. Upper body." Springtrap hinted.

They went back to trying to find differences. Pretty quickly, something clicked into Foxy's brain! "Ears!" Foxy yelled, pointing at Springtrap's ears with his hook.

Springtrap smiled. "You won. You got it right." Springtrap replied.

Freddy just laughed at Springtrap's stupid little trick. "You could've just said it!" Freddy told him.

"I know, but...I couldn't. Everything in my brain was screaming 'Don't tell them'. So, I made it fun." Springtrap replied.

Freddy smirked and walked up to him. "Oh! Well Springtrap, I hoped you enjoyed your fun. Because now...it's my turn!" Freddy declared before wiggling his fingers on Springtrap's lower ears. Springtrap squeaked like a mouse, and bursted into high-pitched giggles for a while.

Yup. This was worth it. This was worth the extra time spent. Though Springtrap doesn't like to show off his happy side very often, the tickling seemed to have encouraged a more...playful side of Springtrap to arise and take over. Though it was only a start, it was still better than the angry, grumpy old janitor that previously took over his personality. Though Springtrap didn't end up automatically falling into another playful mood, he did get tickled and teased a little more by the fazbear family. When he was being too rude, an animatronic was bound to show up behind him and poke him a few times to get him giggling. Sometimes, Springtrap would test the limits and end up in a full-blown tickle fight! And to make matters worse for Springtrap, the other animatronics were not cyborg like he was! So, they couldn't be tickled back! How unfair!

But the animatronic band's favorite times, were when Springtrap started testing their patience on purpose! All of the playfulness in the Pizzeria seemed to have given Springtrap a little bit of a mischievous streak. When they would tease him, he would learn to tease back. Which to his surprise, actually worked! Especially when they weren't expecting it! Little known fact; animatronics can be flustered when teased enough. And soon, the teasing had turned into full-on competition! When they warned him he'd be tickled, they had to be serious about it and go through with it or else he would call them bluff! Thankfully though, the competitiveness would end up backfiring the moment all 4 of them had pinned him down and tickled him down to a puddle of giggles.

So...Springtrap got used to being the victim of the tickling most of the time. Though it didn't always start off with playfulness and straight up giggling, his brain would quickly catch up and make him feel happy. And that's all he needed to feel okay with the new, playful companions.

[scarlettwitcher]

She’s Everything

Request: by Anon: Can I request a Steve Rogers x Reader based off the song She’s Everything by Brad Paisley? Please and thanks!

Summary: Steve thinks about Y/n

Characters: Steve, Y/n, mentions of avengers

Word Count: 2,645

Warnings: fluff everywhere, that’s it, this is just teeth rotting sweetness, italics are flashbacks

Author’s Note: So I’m gonna be gone for another week! Sorry. I’m going to Dallas to see my dad. I haven’t seen him in over 3 months. I will try to have some fics prepared to just post but if not, I hope you enjoy this one! I don’t really have a lot of marvel tags so if you do love it, please reblog it so it can reach more peeps! Requests and tags are open! Love to my girl @queenxxxsupreme for being my beta. As always, thanks for reading and feedback is welcome/needed. ALSO PSA: I will be changing my url in the next few weeks. I’ll be messaging a few people that tag me regularly about this but just so everyone knows and doesn’t freak out when they don’t see my original name. Don’t worry it’ll be similar to my old one.

“Is there something on my face Rogers?”

“No, no. You’re good.”

“Then why are you staring at me?” Steve opened his mouth to respond but nothing came out. He blushed and coughed, trying to cover up his speechlessness. You started giggling as you reached over pinching his cheek. “Awe, baby, why are you blushing?”

Steve smacked your hand away as you started laughing again and couldn’t help laughing with you. He knew he wouldn’t be able to say it yet but he just couldn’t understand how he found someone like you. Someone who could love him so effortlessly. He knew he had his faults and that the lives you both led were very dangerous. Part of him knows that’s why he appreciates you even more. Everything about you always had him in awe.

Your fashion sense was all over the place, but to Steve, you looked great in everything. One day you appeared at his door with yellow running shoes and he looked at you bewildered but accepted it. He always loved your ripped jeans because he had access to your skin, his hand always buried inside one of the holes, holding your thigh. You had boxes full of sunglasses and on every mission, you’d be wearing a different pair. Steve didn’t sweat too much since he knew you loved buying them from the gasoline station near the tower. Now and again, you’d stump him with your “I have nothing to wear!”. He’d always turn to look at the giant closet full of your clothes but he never dared say anything, not again anyways. He learned his lesson the first time when you threw a shoe at him. But his favorite was when you wore his clothes. Nothing could get him as turned on as seeing you in his clothes.

Steve thought about how much you loved chocolate, sneaking in chocolate bars into his room every night, or hot chocolate, or waking him up at three in the morning, asking him to bring you some chocolate you left in the kitchen. He thought about how much you loved going to the movie theatre even though Tony had his own movie Theatre. He scolded the both of you for wasting money when he had everything. You simply laughed and said the popcorn was better. On rough days, especially after missions, being at the theatre was one of your comfort spots and he knew this. He knew you loved being in the dark and pushing all of your worries onto the characters on the screen.

Steve smiled to himself when he thought about how much you loved staring at the stars and telling him about the constellations. It amazed him how much you knew about space. He loved windy nights when the breeze would blow your hair around, your sweet scent. The nights that had a touch of your lingering scent were always the best. He’d hold you extra tight those nights. On his rough nights, you were always there. You’d pull him onto your chest, rest his head there, letting him listen to the soft sound of your heartbeat. He always knew he could talk to you, let everything go. You’d listen intently, give him reassurance when he needed it. You’d always drag your fingers through his hair, cry with him when he needed it, and never let go, not ever.

You had always been very protective of Steve. You knew of all the pain he went through. Hell, you were with him most of the time when they happened. It’s not to say the super soldier didn’t get on your nerves either. You had only had a few fights but they were always intense. You’d both end up screaming at each other. You always had a hard time containing yourself, so mid argument, you’d leave. You’d go to the gym and pound into a sand bag until you broke it or your knuckles were broken and bleeding. Steve would always find you sitting in the corner. He’d sit down next to you and you’d talk it out. And things would be okay. It’s always how it ended. You’d be okay. You were always really affectionate with him. You’d never leave bed without kissing him somewhere on his face, never leave the room without hugging him, especially never leave the quinjet on a mission without kissing him deeply. He relished in your touches, a slave for more, a slave for your affection.

Steve couldn’t believe he found someone like you. You were what he always wanted. It took him a while to move on from Peggy. Once he met you and you hit it off, he decided it was time. He closed that chapter of his life and moved on with you. Everyone says he’s obsessed but he just knows he’s in love. Tony always kicks him out of the room when he starts to talk about you. Steve doesn’t realize it but sometimes he just talks about you for hours and hours and hours. Even you tell him he’s ridiculous. He just laughs it off and continues. He just can’t believe he has you.

Every Saturday, you’d push him to go out. He wasn’t always keen to be in public but he sucked it up and went with you, knowing if he didn’t, you’d just go out by yourself and he wanted to be around you. Somehow, you always found something different, something new to do in the city. He loved watching you light up at the poetry cafe you found, watching people read their beautiful poems, or the way your eyes would widen when you find a beautiful greenhouse on someone’s roof. You smelled like roses for days after you left there. Even though neither you nor Steve were religious, you went to church on Sundays, to accompany your parents. It was so foreign to Steve. His life was full of danger. Enemies, missions, death experiences, that was a normal Sunday for him. But church, family dinner, fancy dressing, he was way out of his element but the few hours of normal he got with you and your family was everything he ever wanted. Sometimes you couldn’t make it and it always bummed him out. He loved Sundays with your family. They had basically adopted him. When your mom passed away a year ago, she had given you her cross. You weren’t all that comfortable wearing the cross but you knew what it meant to her. So you had Tony melt it and turn it into a locket with her picture and Steve’s inside. You never took it off after that.

Steve hated Mondays but you didn’t care. Except you turned into Oscar the grouch, yelling your good amount of fuck and bitch in the morning. Steve thought it was hilarious, watching you flip him off because he said you looked like a ray of sunshine. By the end of the day, you were back to your old self. Steve helped train new agents and you always had the bath prepared for him when he returned. Bubbles littering the surface and candles on every open surface. Sometimes, you’d even join him, sitting in the tub waiting for him. These were some of his favorite moments. Steve thought back to a few months before when he had arrived to your shared room but you were nowhere to be found. After bathing and changing, he walked around the tower looking for you until he finally found you in what was the rec room. The lights were dimmed, candles everywhere, as well as rose petals. One of Steve’s favorite songs was playing softly in the background and you were standing in the middle, dolled up in a nice dress and makeup.

“What’s this? It looks really beautiful, doll.”

“This,” You twirled your fingers around, signaling to the room. “Is just me saying I love you. Dance with me.” Steve rushed over, embracing you in his arms before you both started rocking to the music. You started talking about your days, succumbing to each other, laughing and enjoying yourselves. You had poured wine and handed him a glass as you drank together. You pulled him towards the couch and you kept talking, sitting there for hours, just like you always did. After your first glass, you were a giggling mess. You were a huge lightweight and Steve always made fun of you for it. You playfully acted hurt when he called you out on it and he immediately tried to make up for it, littering your skin with kisses and promises of forever.

“Earth to Steve.” Steve came to with you snapping your fingers in front of him. He looked at you confused for a second before dragging his hand down his face.

“Sorry doll. Did I space out again?” You smirked and nodded your head before flicking his knee.

“Third time this week babe.” Steve blushed and shook his head.

“I’m sorry doll. I don’t mean to.”

“What are you thinking about so much?” You curled into his chest as you both laid in your bed. You listened to his heartbeat raise just a bit and you smiled.

“You.”

“No wonder my ears don’t stop ringing.” Steve laughed and shook his head. He kissed your forehead softly and pulled you even closer to him. It wasn’t long before you said your good nights, your soft even breathing letting him know you had fallen asleep. He sighed softly and slowly laid you down on your side of the bed before standing up and walking out to his balcony, looking out at the view. He looked over at your sleeping form and smiled to himself as he saw you took all of the covers and bundled yourself up. He was going to freeze that night for sure. He grabbed his wallet from the dresser, flipping it open and looking at the picture of you that he had in it. He had been the one to take the picture. You were at a festival that you had dragged the team on. You were so excited, you had even bought a beautiful sundress that flowed beautifully around you. You had found a dancing spot and you were letting go, dancing around like no one else was there. Steve pulled out his phone and took the picture, having it developed later on. It was one of his favorite moments with you.

Steve knew you were it for him. He was completely head over heels in love with you. He couldn’t stop himself thinking of you as his wife, the mother of his children, the woman he was to, somehow, grow old with. He couldn’t imagine his life without you in it. Once upon a time he was still hung over Peggy but he realized that maybe that love prepared him for the intensity of yours. He was thankful for it. Steve remembers exactly how he met you, actually he prayed for it. Steve wasn’t religious and he wasn’t one to pray but he was being called into a meeting with the team to evaluate some old missions, file some paperwork, all textbook, but he was going to be stuck in the room all day. While riding the elevator to the meeting room, Steve looked up for a few seconds murmuring, “I don’t know if you’re listening but please, make this meeting bearable.” The moment the prayer left his lips, the elevator stopped on a floor and you stepped in. You nodded your acknowledgement to the soldier but Steve couldn’t stop staring at you. You were so beautiful and he just couldn’t help but gawk. “You going to the meeting too?”

Steve snapped himself out of his creepiness and nodded before sighing quietly. “Yeah. I take it you are too.”

“Yeah, Stark said it was mandatory with the training. Fingers crossed nobody dies.” Steve chuckled but before he could respond, Natasha and Clint joined on the elevator and you got to chatting away with the other Avengers, being rather familiar with them. Immediately, Steve took a liking to you and after the meeting, cornered Natasha several times, trying to get information about you.

Steve smiled fondly at the memory as he stared at the night sky, watching the clouds slowly pass by. He replayed most of his favorite memories of the both of you in his head. He wondered if this was how the rest of his life with you was going to be. He imagined you and him in your small house in the woods. You’re both sitting on your rocking chairs on the porch, watching the lake next to your home. You’d be making fun of Steve for putting his pants on backwards that morning and he’d make fun of you for burning the eggs. That was what Steve wanted, to grow old with you.

Steve watched as you moved in your sleep and felt the love blossoming in his chest. He didn’t know how it was possible but he just kept loving you more and more everyday. He knew it, you knew it, everyone knew it. They could see it in the way he looked at you, the way he lunged himself in front of you to protect you on missions. The way he made you breakfast and took you to your favorite restaurants. The way he took an obscene amount of pictures of you and talked about you every chance he got. He was a fool in love.

Steve knew why he was losing himself in thought a lot more than usual. He was reminiscing before he made his decision. He was ready. He wanted it to be nice, something amazingly beautiful and he knew he’d do it soon but he had to do it now. He moved back to the bed and crawled in next to you. He pulled you into his arms, holding you tightly. His cold skin against your warm one made you groan quietly in your sleep. He kissed your head and slowly kissed down your face, peppering you with kisses. When he got to your neck, you hummed quietly, slowly waking up. He kissed down your chest and you were now conscious. You ran your fingers through his hair and smiled in your sleep. “You better have a good reason for waking me Rogers.” You said playfully.

“You think I want you to kick my ass?” You giggled and finally opened your eyes, being met with bright, blue ones. He looked at your face with pure adoration before kissing you softly. He fidgeted nervously before pulling back. You furrowed your brows but decided to not ask, letting him take a moment. It took everything in him to get the words he wanted but he looked at you seriously and took a deep breath. “Y/n, I have never met anyone so stubborn, so determined, so loving and kind, I’ve never met anyone like you and I’m glad I never will because you are one of a kind. You make me such a better person, someone I didn’t think I could be any more. You give me hope for tomorrow and for the future. You’re such a pain in the ass but I wouldn’t have you any other way. I want to be with you for the rest of my life, ” Steve moved to reach into his small bedside dresser, opening his sock drawer and pulling out a velvet box. You watched with wide, teary eyes, your breath hitching when you saw the box. He slowly opened it, showing you the beautiful ring inside. “This past week I’ve been so lost in my mind, I’ve just been thinking about you and us. Thinking about how we fell in love. I know you are what I want. I want to grow old with you and have kids. You are it. So, doll, will you marry me?”

Forever Tags: @iwantthedean @authoressskr @sorenmarie87 @reigningqueenofwords @goldenolaf25 @giftofdreams @winchesterprincessbride @chelsea072498 @kitchenwitchsuperwhovian @itakeawfultoawholenewlevel @fictionalabyss @gabby913 @angelkurenai @sea040561 @sleepylunarwolf @smoothdogsgirl @carryonmyswansong @feelmyroarrrr @evyiione @sofreddie @sis-tafics @nitelotus @trexrambling @dancingalone21 @manawhaat @mermaidxatxheart @winchest09 @ellen-reincarnated1967 @mrswhozeewhatsis @just-another-busy-fangirl @lovebodymindstuff @backseat-of-deans-67chevy @chook007 @akshi8278 @evansrogerskitten @bringmesomepie56 @brooklymw @persephonehemingway @blacktithe7 @donnaintx

Marvel Tags: @captain-rogers-beard​ @imamotherfuckingstar-lord​ @stretchkingblog97​

[skylarmoon71]

Earth 2 Harrison Wells x Reader-Imagine

Disclaimer: I don’t own the Flash.

“Woooo!” you grinned listening through the com link as Jesse and Wally were helping with a robbery. Harry had that constant frown and you just directed your gaze back to the two dots that were zipping after the car. They passed the car easily, forcing the criminals in the vehicle to pull up to a stop. “Alright, cuff them quick, remember don’t let him touch you. “ Barry instructed. 

In a matter of seconds both criminals had no choice but to walk out of the cars. All three speedsters had them cornered. 

“Mission completed. “ Wally said. You fist pumped. “We’re coming in.” Barry said. You pulled out your earplug, awaiting their arrival. You twisted your chair, ready to maybe get a bite to eat. Barry was probably carrying those guys to iron heights. “All in a day's work.” you spoke. When you looked back Harry was still leaned over the desk. You had a feeling you knew why. 

“Hey Oscar, quit being a grouch.” he turned to you with an annoyed look. 

“I don’t appreciate the nicknames you and Cisco insist on using on me.” 

“Well maybe if you smiled once in a while we wouldn’t have too.” he just looked back at his computer. 

“Stop worrying. Jesse’s a smart girl. She knows how to handle herself. She’s your daughter after all.” 

A ghost of a smile made its way on his face. You and Harry never really got along, but every once in a while you would have moments like this. Honestly, you were sporting a huge crush on him. That’s why when he first came you made it your mission to avoid him. Whenever you did bump into him you gave him the cold shoulder. 

You couldn’t trust him, and for good reason. After what happened with Eobard you told yourself you’d never trust anyone with that face again. Little did you know there was an entire multiverse of Wells. 

Lucky you.

As time went on though, it was becoming harder to deny your growing attraction for the man. When you found out about his daughter, your wall slowly crumbled and you made any and all efforts to comfort him. The both of you still bickered though. 

At that point you decided it was better to just give up on your feelings. He obviously didn’t feel the same way. And it didn’t make sense chasing after a man that had no interest in you. 

With that thought you turned, exiting the cortex. 

“Maybe I’ll stop by the store and get some beer.” you could tell it was going to be a long day. Might as well treat yourself with some booze and outdated movies.

~~~

“So what do we have today?” When you strutted into the cortex the next morning you were shocked to see no one there. Harry was the only one at his desk. He looked up, making a face when he saw you. You frowned. You were going to deal with this once and for all. You could deal with him not having feelings for you, but that didn’t give him the right to treat you like crap.

“Hey what’s your deal with me!” you demanded. He looked over, wondering if it was him you were yelling at. 

“Excuse me?” you pointed. “Don't pull that excuse me crap, you know what I’m talking about. Ever since you got here you’ve treated everyone like the dirt beneath your feet. I allowed it at the beginning because you were a grieving parent, but your attitude still stinks, especially with me.” He slammed down his tool.

“I don’t recall  being obligated to be a nice person. I’m not Ramon and Allen. I’m not here to be your friend. My only goal is to help with the new threat that’s it. “ you scoffed. 

“You really are something else. I’m not asking you to be a saint. But would it kill you to wear a smile, or say good morning!!” he walked towards you like a lion approaching it’s prey. You almost backed down when he was standing right in front of you. He was staring you down, and all at once you seemed to lose the ability to speak. He towered you, blue eyes pinning you in your spot. 

“Is there anything else you would like to get off your chest.” his voice was lower and you felt like the air had been smacked right out of you. 

“N-No I-I..I uh..” somehow you forgot how to make actual sentences. 

“I have no desire to be your crouch. Snow told me about your relationship with the previous Wells.” His words made you take a step back. 

“W-What does that have to do with…”

“He broke your heart. Maybe it's your fault for being so naive. “ you felt a pang in your chest at his words. You looked up at him, eyes watering. You weren’t sure how, but at that moment Harry looked like he actually regretted the words he said. He looked down running a hand over his face. 

“Listen that was..I didn’t mean it like that I just-” you didn’t want to hear his explanation. 

“I think you’ve said all that you wanted.” you replied coldly. You tried to hide the tightening in your throat as best you could when you spoke. 

“I won’t waste time trying to get close to another Wells. I should have learned my lesson the first time. “ with that you were gone. Upon your exit you almost crashed into Barry. He held you by the shoulders apologizing. When he saw your fresh tears he tried to find out the reason. You pulled away from him, rushing off. Barry’s eyes moved in Harry’s direction. He looked pissed. 

“What did you say to (Y/N)!” he accused.

“You don’t have to lecture me Allen. I already know I messed up. “ Harry turned back to his desk. He wanted to punch himself. 

~~~~

That night you were tucked in your bed, legs pulled to your chest. The memories of Dr. Wells, or Thawne for that matter replaying in your head. All the sweet words he said to you. How special he said you were. It was all a lie, a facade to ensure he accomplished his goal. You regret everything you ever felt for him. In some sick way Harry was right. If you weren’t blinded by your feelings for him maybe it would have been easier to see through him. Even when you found out about him you never wanted to believe it. But all the evidence was there, and when you confronted the man, when he was standing right in front of you, he never even looked sorry. He just wore that stupid smirk on his face. That sinister smile as he ripped your heart out of your chest and threw it in your face. 

~~

“(Y/N). “ you cursed at the voice behind you. After your little spew with Harry you made it your mission to avoid him. You succeeded for about a week. Of course he was going to find you sooner or later. The person who called you wasn’t Harry though, it was his daughter. You turned to her, forcing a smile on your face. “Hey..” you said a bit awkwardly. You could tell by the look on her face that she wanted an explanation. “What’s going on with you and Dad. “ you were hoping she wouldn’t ask that. “Nothing, you know us we could hardly stand each other.” 

She placed a hand on her hip. “Yeah, usually you’re going at it  like an old married couple, but you haven’t talked in so long and dad he’s..he’s not acting like himself.” you were a bit worried. Then you remembered why you were angry at him.

“That’s not my problem.” you stated flatly. You knew it was mean, but he was the one that said those things to you. He had no right. 

Jesse looked ready to say something, but the person you were dreading walked out from behind her and you suddenly felt like crying again. 

He stepped forward and just as he opened his mouth alarms started blaring. You flinched and Jesse braced. “Someone’s in Star Labs!” she bolted out to scope out the threat and Harry moved closer to you. 

“You can yell at me later. Right now just stay close.” he instructed. You nodded. As much as he made your blood boil, it wouldn’t do any good if a dangerous meta was loose and either of you got hurt because of a spat. 

You followed close behind as he moved in the direction of the cortex. When you made it to the entrance Barry was putting cuffs on an unconscious Jesse. Harry ran over in a panic. 

“Allen what the hell are you doing!!” Barry waved his hands about to explain. Caitlin was kneeling down, retracting the needle from the girl's skin. 

“Those metahumans we took down last week. Somehow they got out of Iron Heights. I think one of the guards slipped up. One of them has manipulative powers.” He informed. 

“They twist your view. Jesse thought we were the enemy. “ Caitlin added. 

“I had to take her out before she could get hurt. I locked one of them up in the pipeline but the other is somewhere here. “ Barry interjected. He looked down at the computer, trying to pull up footage of the halls. 

“Try right behind you.” you spun around just in time for him to press his hands on your forehead. A red light glowed in his palm, passing through your skin. Barry zipped forward, shoving the male away from you. The meta crashed into the wall, falling down and  passing out from the force of the blow. Barry wasted no time, cuffing him quickly. 

Harry looked over to check you. “Stay back Harry, she's been hit.” Caitlin advised. She had a syringe in her hand, unsure of how to administer the shot without provoking you. 

“Give it to me, I could get close enough in a second. “ You turned to Barry and you screamed in terror. He looked back, shocked to see the level of fear in your eyes as you backed up against the wall. 

“Please don’t hurt him I’ll do anything please!!” you were pleading. Barry approached, raising his hands to show you he didn’t mean any harm. 

“Hey (Y/N). Listen it’s me Barry.” he pulled off his cowl, but that just triggered you more. 

“Don’t hurt them Dr. Wells I’m begging you! Please don’t, I’ll do anything!!” Barry froze, he recalled you saying those words before. 

“S-She’s..she’s reliving a memory.” he muttered in recognition. 

Harry stared. “What do you mean by memory? I thought he just manipulates your concept of the present reality. “ Caitlin shook her head. “They morph reality yes, but reality for everyone is different. Some people see their friends as enemies. Others face a reality they can’t control. One they feel powerless in” Harry couldn’t believe it. The level of horror on your face hurt him. When he made that statement about Dr. Wells he knew he crossed a line. What he didn’t realize was the level of emotional damage Thawne actually did to you. You weren’t a meta. So when he attacked you couldn’t do anything but stand there and watch as he tried to kill your friends. 

Harry took the syringe from Caitlin’s hands, storming over to your direction. He couldn’t see you like this. When he was standing directly in front of you your eyes widened and you tried to scramble away. 

“D-DON’T!” Harry pressed the needle into your neck. It took a while, but slowly, your eyes started to lower. Just as you were about to pass out you looked directly at him. 

“Harry..” you said softly. He smiled, removing the needle. He tossed it to the side, cradling you into his arms. “I’ve got you, don’t worry. You’re safe. I won’t let anyone hurt you again. “

Barry and Caitlin watched from the back, both a bit stunned by the level of care the man displayed when holding you.

~~

You groaned, holding your head as you tried to sit up. When you finally came to, Caitlin was right at your side with a smile. 

“Look who’s finally up.” you gave her a weak smile, leaning against the head of the bed. 

“I got socked by that meta didn’t I?”

“Affirmative.” she said cheekily. You just laughed. “Wow, my head feels like I got hit by a bus.” She jotted something down before placing a hand to your forehead.

“I think that’s my fault. I made that in a rush in case those metahumans got a hold of our speedsters. Unfortunately a shot like that does the trick but the dose isn’t really easy on regular people. “

“Noted.” you looked over, noticing Barry and Jesse standing at the door.

“ You really gave me a scare. How are you feeling?” Barry’s question made you shoot him a look.

“Sorry, I guess it was a stupid question. But hey at least we caught the guys.” you nodded. 

“That’s good.” Barry was still watching you. “(Y/N), I just wanted you to know. What happened with Thawne..it wasn’t your fault. We know it hurt you maybe far worse than any of us.” you looked at him a bit taken aback. A shaky breath exited your lips. “Y-Yeah, you don’t have to worry about it. I'm over all that. It’s been months.” He shook his head. 

“There’s no time stamp on how long those types of wounds heal. If you ever wanna talk, we’re all right here.” Caitlin and even Jesse smiled, agreeing with him. You gave another nod. 

“Thanks guys, I appreciate it.” Jesse grinned. 

“Of course, by the way. There is someone who’s just as worried. “ before you could ask you felt the wind blow your hair back. When she reappeared there was someone with her. 

“Jesse I told you not to-” his complaints stopped when his eyes landed on you. She unhooked her arms and at that moment everyone started to make their exit. You turned to Caitlin with pleading eyes, begging her not to leave. She gave you a thumbs up, vanishing around the hall. 

When it was just the two of you, you shifted back into the bed. 

“Listen I-”

“I apologize.” Harry cut you off. You stared at him. Not sure if you heard him right. 

“Wait..did you just say..” he stepped closer, taking a seat at the edge of your bed. Him being so close made you readjust your position. You picked at the sheets nervously. 

“I was unaware of how deep Thawne’s wounds scarred you. Then I made a comment that was uncalled for. I apologize.” you bit down on your lip. 

“I’m sorry too.” you said finally. “It was childish of me to avoid you like I did. I should have just talked to you. The truth is you were right. I let my feelings dictate everything I do. The feelings I had for him and the ones I have for you.” Harry looked over at your words. 

“I-I like you Harry.” you confessed. “Y-You look just like him so I told myself never to go down that road again. But little by little I couldn't help but be intrigued by you, attracted to you. I’m so stupid!” you said, fresh tears falling down your cheeks. Harry moved closer scooping you into his arms. 

“Don’t say that you're far from stupid. “ you clenched your hands into his clothing.

“I am..I am the foolish one. I’m just as much attracted to you.” he whispered. You pulled back.

“W-What..” his hands rested on your cheek, wiping any evidence of your tears.

“I distanced myself because I thought you were only seeking solace in me to replace him. I was cruel to you because it was the only thing I could do to deny just how much your presence affected me. I’m completely and utterly infatuated with you (Y/N).” you swallowed. He was so close now. “If I haven’t already ruined my chances, I would like an opportunity to show you just how much I care about you.” 

“Okay..” you mumbled. With the way he was looking at you now there wasn’t much you could say. His thumb traced the outline of your cheekbone. 

Everywhere he touched felt like a spark to your skin. His lips met your own in a slow, hesitant kiss. It wasn’t much at first, just the innocent touching of lips. 

After a few moments you wanted more. Your hands tightened their hold on his clothing as you tried to pull him closer. He complied, pressing you softly into the mattress. You sighed at the feel of him. Your hands slipped into his hair and he gave a soft appreciative sound. Your stomach twirled at the little noise. Your hands wandered, you hooked your fingers into the hoops of his pants, pulling. His hips thrusted into you and you gasped. Your lips disconnected and Harry continued pressing kisses to your skin as you tried to regain your breath. 

“We should...probably...stop..”you forced out in between pants. 

“Agreed, they could..walk in at any time..” he was still pressing heated kisses to your body. His leg moved between your own and you moaned, looking at him a bit startled. Harry smirked down at you. “Then again, I think I’ve been holding out too long. Something tells me you have too.” you gulped when you felt his hand travelling under your clothing. 

“H-Harry..” you whined weakly. You whimpered when he squeezed your breast. 

“I finally have you, I’m not sure I really want to stop..” he growled into you ear. 

Someone clearing their throat made you both turn. 

“Allen.” Harry said sharply. Barry looked uncomfortable, like he regretted even coming in. 

“N-Nevermind, It can wait. “ he dove out of there faster than you’d ever seen. 

Harry’s eyes fixed back on you. 

“Now where were we.” 

[queennicoleinboots]

A Special PBC Royalty News Report by Stan Doe and Chrissy, submissive queen of nomenclature with many titles

"PRINCE BANANA ICE SHUT UP! WE'RE ABOUT TO BE LIVE!" King Bruce Ice shouted as he wore a huge silver crown on his head. He was staring at Prince Banana Ice.

Prince Banana Ice still couldn't stop giggling. He had a gold crown over his more ridiculous mohawk.

"You already are, King Bruce Ice," Chrissy, submissive queen of nomenclature with many titles spoke.

"OH SHIT!" King Bruce Ice said with a loud growl.

Chrissy, submissive queen of nomenclature with many titles started laughing. "I love this job."

Squire Blinky was wearing a blue sash over his shoulders with his light teal long-sleeved button-down shirt and blinking the news.

Count Vanilla wore a black cape with his white polo shirt with the pocket on the left breast. He was growling the news.

Prince Banana Ice was giggling as he translated what they were saying, "Hahaha. I'm sorry. This is definitely going on Youfail.cahm. But yes, Jaybird, a goat who is literally a GIANT FLOATING HEAD HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA." He was snort-laughing and failing miserably to contain himself.

"I'm sorry, PBC viewers. My son uncontrollably laughs literally when he sees a floating head. He gets that condition from his father. Jaybird, the giant floating goat head, will tell us the significance of AI script writing and its reflections on the living beings' condition as soon as my son stops hysterically laughing... I'm surprised his larynx still works," Queen Gloria spoke as she wore a bright gold intricate crown on her head.

Prince Banana Ice was covering his mouth and had his head on the desk as he was heaving and laughing.

"Thank you, Queen Gloria," Jaybird said as his head took up the entire screen.

Prince Banana Ice lost it and literally fell out of his chair laughing. The other members of the royalty news family stared at him with concern. Count Vanilla suppressed a giggle.

"Seriously. What the hell is so funny about my floating head?" Jaybird asked. "Is he good?"

"No, he's fucked up," King Bruce Ice said as a matter-of-factly as Prince Banana Ice was laughing hysterically and flying around the studio with his rocket shoes yet again. Blinky and Count Vanilla were now laughing hysterically.

"CLEARLY!" Jaybird's voice boomed as he, too, started laughing uncontrollably. "Chrissy, submissive queen of laughter tolerance and nomenclature, can you please close-caption my broadcast. Hahahahahaha! I can't do this. This is the second time that RIDICULOUS bear has started flying around the studio while laughing hysterically for no... HAHAHAHAHAHA apparent HAHUEHA reason!" The flying goathead was now laughing, crying, and shaking.

The news crew that were off-camera were also laughing.

Chrissy, comedian who also was breaking down with laughter, was putting closed captions on Jaybird's floating head. They read:

"In my opinion, the most interesting part of Bouregard [the AI playwright] has been his way of teaching us patterns in science fiction storytelling. Bouregard's writing sounds original and crazy, but it's still based on what living beings actually write. Oscar the Grouch calls these results the 'average' of everything Bouregard looked at. Certain phrases kept coming up again and again. There's an interesting recurring pattern in Moonfall where characters say, 'WHAT IS THAT?!,' 'NO, I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS?!,' and 'DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS, BECAUSE I SURE DON'T.' They're questioning the environment and questioning what’s in front of them. There's a pattern in sci-fi movies of characters trying to understand the environment. Interestingly, Oscar the Grouch has developed a writing pattern similar to Bouregard. He just regurgitates on the paper and hopes the audience likes that written vomit flavor of the week. Xara's writing has become more and more like that. It shows how much of a joke the writing community has become in 2021. When the writing becomes degenerate, the whole society becomes degenerate. I'm actually trying to write a REAL memoir with Sci-Fi tropes. I'm not regurgitating, but if I did, who the hell would care, ya know? Does anyone really know what's going on in the writing community anymore?"

"Frankly, I'm not sure. Your report seems to sum it up, though. Thank you for your report, Jaybird," Chrissy, submissive queen of nomenclature with many titles said while trying to be serious again.

"You're welcome, Chrissy, submissive queen of nomenclature with many titles. I'm in pain from laughter. Thank you," Jaybird said as he was trying to breathe.

"You're welcome, Jaybird. I've been trying to write, but between having to file five weeks of paperwork to even get on the Green Planet in the first place, getting everyone off of the ship, feeding 46 very hungry pups, and having back to back broadcasts, I just don't have the time. The public doesn't know what secretaries GO THROUGH," Chrissy, submissive queen of nomenclature with many titles said.

"PREACH! Being a secretary is a nightmare. I had to file two weeks of paperwork to merely deliver goods to... Prince Banana Ice... I can't get over that name. And that was horrid. Aye. I couldn't imagine the paperwork for permanent residence on this planet," Queen Gloria said.

Prince Banana Ice's rocket shoes were tied together and hanging like Christmas lights on a clothesline over the entire royal newscast. Prince Banana Ice was wiping his eyes and trying to compose himself.

"It was drrrrrreeeeeaaaadful. Speaking of secretarial work, where the hell is Xara? And more importantly, where is PRINCE PETER WALLACE PARKER!? I haven't even so much seen her or HIM in the break room lately! What is going on?! They are scheduled to do reports! Especially Prince Peter," Chrissy, submissive queen of nomenclature with many titles said strongly.

"I have no idea, but Xara's writing is definitely funny at least. As for Prince Peter, he has mastered the disappearing act. No one ever knows where he is," Pastor Penn said as he wore a gold sash over his gray polo shirt. He changed shirts in the commercial break.

"I quite agree. It's sensational in the most unsensational of ways. It says a lot and says nothing. It's the most untalented talent I have ever had the guilty pleasure of reading," Prince Oliver: Werewolf of the United Planets spoke as he wore a small silver crown on his head.

"I share your sentiment, Prince Oliver: Werewolf of the United Planets," Pastor Penn said.

"Admittedly me, too. Ummm... Xara's writing... ummm... is so bad that it's good.... uggghhhh.... I'm good with her NOT doing her broadcast right now," Prince Banana Ice stammered as he nervously looked around the room and tapped his fingers together. "And-and-and I'm definitely not ready for Prince Peter. Not even a little. Nope Nope Nope nope."

Count Vanilla growled eighteen times.

"I know it's not technically my choice of when their broadcasts are due, but ummmm..." Prince Banana Ice spoke softly as he looked down at the desk and blushed.

"Why does it matter when they are broadcasting?" King Bruce Ice asked.

"I believe I know the answer," a tall black goat with a melodic deep voice answered. His fur was brushed perfectly, and his soft brown eyes glowed in the lights.

"Please enlighten us, Stan Doe. We have to do something while Xara and Peter are making us wait!" Chrissy, sub with many titles said with a loud sigh.

The camera showed Stan Doe wearing a gray suit, white shirt, and a red tie. "Yes. I am Stan Doe, a brother reporter of Chrissy and her unlimited titles. Prince Banana Ice is not ready for Xara's or Prince Peter's broadcast because they are XARA's and PRINCE PETER'S broadcasts. It's not the content. It's the people reporting them. Also, pronouns are important," he spoke in a deep voice. He was more intelligent than most other goats.

"Correct! Wow! Someone who understands me!" Prince Banana Ice shouted with glee.

"Okay," King Bruce Ice said with his eyebrow raised. "Why are you not ready for XARA or PRINCE PETER to report?"

"OH COME ON! DO I REALLY NEED TO EXPLAIN THAT ON INTERGALACTIC NEWS?!" Prince Banana Ice shouted as the blush deepened on his face as he untied his shoes from the clothesline quickly.

"Probably not," Pastor Penn stated.

"Thank you," Prince Banana Ice said as he put his shoes back on. He was probably ready to use them at any minute.

"But I will," Steve Doe said as the camera went back to him. "Prince Banana Ice is nervous around most females and males he thinks are more attractive than he is. When in company of several females or very attractive men, you will find him hiding on the ceiling or under a desk. Why? Even *I* have no idea."

Prince Banana left his crown on the desk in front of his chair and was off-camera.

King Bruce Ice chuckled. "So... when are Xara and Prince Peter getting here?"

King Joebear intercepted the transmission with his naked black bear body and a gold crown on his head. "GQ?"

"National Geographic," King Bruce Ice said. "By the way, I guess every bear in the League of Extraordinary Bears is now in the Royal Court of Royal Bears. More news will be reported on the Royal Court of Royal Bears when we figure out who is doing what role in the Royal Court of Bears. But luckily, we have ironed out most of the members in the Royal Court of Royal Bears. Again, more of the story will come."

"Yes, Bruce... King Bruce Ice. I noted the crown. I've been busy playing Magic The Gathering. It's degenerate, so it isn't newsworthy," King Joebear said.

"You play MTG, too?!" Prince Banana Ice asked as he leaned into the camera and looked at King Joebear.

"Yes. Do you?" King Joebear asked.

"Yes. I'm only *the* Master Deck Builder on this side of Glorgia," Prince Banana Ice said with a smug smile.

"No, dude. That title belongs to me," King Joebear spoke.

"...Doubt it," Prince Banana Ice said with a smirk.

King Bruce Ice growled to stop that conversation. "Where is your wife, King Joebear?"

"Queen Xara is actually taking a dump. She apologizes for being late to the broadcast," King Joebear said.

"THE MORE IMPORTANT QUESTION IS, IS SHE ALL RIGHT?! AND DO YOU KNOW WHERE PRINCE PETER IS?! I MUST KNOW IMMEDIATELY!" Chrissy, sub of many titles shouted.

"Yes. She is watching your broadcast and taking a dump. I haven't seen or heard from Prince Peter in weeks, Chrissy... are you royalty?" King Joebear asked.

"ABSOLUTELY NOT! I WOULD NEVER INSULT THE WORD 'ROYALTY' BY ASSOCIATING MYSELF WITH IT! KING JOEBEAR, you honor me, but I do not deserve that honor," Chrissy, sub of many titles said dramatically.

Everyone clapped. Chrissy, sub actress of nomenclature, was a great actress. She should have been a Broadway star.

"Thank you, everyone. Does anyone have any pressing news while we wait for Xara, OH MY GOD... NESS! QUEEN XARA! I REPEAT, QUEEN XARA! EXCUSE ME!" Chrissy, Submissive Drama Queen said as her greenish yellowish hazel eyes were about to pop out of her head.

"Submissive Drama Queen Chrissy, you're all right," I said as I showed up on the screen from the neck up.

"Oh heavens, Queen Xara. I missed you! Are you ready to do your broadcast?" Submissive Drama Queen Chrissy asked. "And do you know where Prince Peter is?! Also, a side note. I need that video AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!"

Submissive Drama Queen Chrissy wanted a private video of my audition to be a news anchor should my cleaning business have trouble getting registered with the local government in 2022 due to jab requirements that I will forever refuse to comply with.

Prince Banana Ice screamed and flew up to the ceiling. How the hell does he stick to the ceiling? Is he a spider bear?

"No. I'm not. Hehehe. I'm looking for Prince Peter, too. I assume he is hiding from the world due to another strain of the Plague appearing. I noticed that he was having more difficulty floating than usual. Maybe he is having second thoughts about being jabbed again. I am sorry that I haven't done the video yet. I have been busy with... stuff," I said as I looked at Prince Banana Ice now sprawled out on the ceiling as he tried desperately to hide from the camera. I giggled. "Is Prince Banana Ice good?" I giggled again.

Prince Banana Ice hyperventilated as he stared at me from the ceiling with wide eyes before he gulped. "Yeah. I'm fine up here. REALLY! Quick, can someone else do a broadcast?" Prince Banana Ice asked.

"Yes. I can. And it is very urgent! ....Queen Chrissy, can you provide me with an hour to broadcast? This is very urgent!" Pastor Penn asked.

"Hang on. Xara, dammit Queen Xara. What the hell is wrong with me tonight?!" Submissive Drama Queen Chrissy asked.

"You're nervous, Submissive Drama Queen Chrissy. What do you need?" I asked.

"May I give Pastor Penn 60 minutes of air time?" Submissive Drama Queen Chrissy asked. "I need something to keep my mind off of PRINCE PETER'S ABSENCE!"

"Oh yeah! I love Off Grid Desert Farming with Penn and Alexia. Best news channel ever," I said.

"Thank you, Xara. You're one of my favorite contributors. I'd love to talk more, but I have GOT to get this news out," Pastor Penn said.

"No problem. Pastor Penn. You have the floor," I said.

"Thank you. And we must thank Squire Blinky, Count Vanilla, Prince Banana Ice, Queen Gloria, King Bruce Ice, Jaybird, Stan Doe, Queen Chrissy, and last but not least Prince Oliver: Werewolf of the United Planets for their contributions to today's broadcast," Pastor Penn said.

Everyone thanked Pastor Penn and nodded to him. Prince Banana Ice chuckled one last time before he flew the fuck out of the news studio.

"Thank you. We will be right back with a 60-minute special with Pastor Penn and Off Grid Desert Farming with his wife, Alexia after another 15-minute commercial break and another long period of time before PRINCE PETER ARRIVES! GOOD HEAVENS!," Submissive Drama Queen Chrissy spoke to the camera with a needy look before dramatic elevator music played in the background.