#How to remove a type added by Add-Type

[kozachenko]

Shortly after that Zanmu drawing, I went on an art spree and made small little drawings of a majority of the current playable characters in Touhou (I've been procrastinating on drawing Aya and Ran) and finally gave myself refernce points for how to draw all these characters going forward! Also, don't mind the change in background colour, that's just me changing the background so the values are actually visible lol.

Artist's Notes;

So the first one I started with was Reimu, and the inspiration for her pose came from this pose reference on Pinterest of a girl doing ribbon dancing, and I thought "Damn, that's very Reimu-coded" and did a quick little Reimu drawing from that.

This was also the drawing where I finally learned what makes a Reimu drawing feel like Reimu. It's the shirt, it's literally just the shirt. I decided to try making Reimu's shirt have a stronger square shape and oh my god it's like I discovered some kind of secret sauce because it just feels so much more like Reimu. I also gave Reimu a tabard and loose pants because I felt like that also fit her very well and also tied in some element's of Yukari's design into hers. I also made her bow look more like a very geometric butterfly as a bit of a tie in to "Diochromatic Lotus Butterfly" and also because I think butterfly symbolism fits her a lot. I also left the hands unfinished because they are not the focus of this piece, Reimu is, I don't wanna cry over how I can't get the hands right and then never get to the actually fun parts of the drawing. Previously, I did some design experimentation with Reimu where I added a little ornament on her obi that was inspired by Yuna's design from Final Fantasy 10 (I can't remember if I ever posted that one lol, also FFX is so good you guys I love it so much) and I like it, I think it adds some fun assymetry to her design that I think makes it look neat. I also gave her some more traditional Japanese shoes (I don't know the name of them so please correct me if you know) since I've seen other artists doing it and I love that look so I added that to this drawing as well.

I also really like how Marisa turned out, I experimented a bit with her body type and outfit, though I didn't really go too off-model with her compared to Reimu. I liked the longer sleeves on her and I gave her a big bow on the back of her apron since I thought it looked cute. I couldn't find a spot for the bow on her hat that looked good so sadly that isn't present in this version of her :( I do like how her face turned out though, since I've also been experimenting with how differently stylized I can make faces in my art. I will always love mangas like Hunter X Hunter that can put two extremely differently stylized characters on the same panel and make it look cohesive, it's why I love the style so much.

I think the crulest irony is not being able to draw your favourite character well while you're hyperfixating on them, but then only being able to draw them how you picture them once they're no longer your favourite, and that happened with Sakuya here. I was initially gonna give her the flashiest eyeshadow known to man but when I removed the layer wih the eyeshadow rendering on it I ended up liking it more without it, so now she's just got some nice bottom lashes. I tried giving her more of an hourglass shape for her body type, mainly to differentiate her more from Reimu and Marisa, and I focused on making as many points in her drawing as sharp as I can. I also gave her some white gloves because I like the idea of Sakuya having fancy gloves, it fits her. To me, Sakuya has always been the most high femme of the main Touhou characters. Maybe this is just because she was my gay awakening, maybe it's just influence from the fandom, but it just kind of makes sense to me. Much like Marisa, I also emphasized the bow ribbons for extra oomph with the silhouette and when I added the red bows and looked at the overall design, I fixed the lack of red anywhere else by just... covering her in blood... I mean she does work for two vampires and she's exactly the sanest person in Gensokyo so please pardon my indulgence in edginess it couldn't be helped.

Youmu was really fun to do but also kinda challenging. In my mind I wanted to make her feel different compared to everyone else I've drawn so far, short enough to be somewhat accurate to canon, but not too childish looking since she never really acts all that childish in cannon and it wouldn't make sense for her to look like a child. I also had to make her look fast and speedy without her looking like Sakuya and potentially avoiding same body syndrome with Aya, who's whole gimmick is speed. In the end, I think her drawing is my favourite, mainly because of the shapes and silhouette. I also really like how I golden-ratioed myon. I also took a few liberties with her outfit and decided to give it some layers to add visual interest. I also like how the cuts in the clothing add more triangles, which adds to the shape language. For her face, I was wondering what to do with her eyes until I decided to just go for the simple, glowing, circular eyes she has in the final product. I was also listening to a bunch of Gorrilaz albums while drawing these (Demon Days is my favourite album btw, idk how basic of a take that is though) and my brain 100% was subconsciously influenced by some elements of the art style (it's so good omg). I also like the shade of green I gave her, though I am a certified green lover so I am 100% biased.

Reisen is where I let myself get a little weird with it, because as you can see, I turned her into an anthropomorphic bunny because she is a weird moon rabbit god dammit, why should she look normal? I was more excited about drawing her IN design than her modern design so that's why she's dressed like that, but I do have a sketch of her in my sketchbook of her modern design. I also had fun rendering her velvet suit jacket. This also helped me tie in some of the reds in her eye and ear, which is also a nice bonus. I also gave her pure white fur to create more visual contrast. Overall, I'm pretty happy with how she turned out, though I wish I didn't shade the legs too much because it's kinda blending with the skirt colour....welp, ya win some ya lose some I guess.

Sanae is also relatively on-model compared to everyone else here, though I did try to make some changes to her outfit to make her feel different from Reimu. First of all, I made her big sleeves (IDK the proper Japanese term for them, if there is one, so again if you know please correct me on this) more open than Reimu's, as well as making them more pointy to give her a different silhouette. I also tried out a new rendering style on her eyes that I also applied to Cirno (we'll get to her in a moment) to also make her face feel different from Reimu's. I'll be honest, I didn't really know what to do with her body type so she just kinda got the "basic slim girl" look in her drawing. I'm not too big a fan of the frills I added to her skirt though, I don't really think she needs them. I'm glad I gave Reimu pants and a tabard instead of a normal skirt because that does help to make the two of them feel different. I also kept her little frog hair clip the same shade of blue as her dress, mainly to economize my colour usage and limit the palette into something a little more tight-nit. I do like how her little hair snake looks though, it's cute lol.

And finally, we have Cirno. I have been a firm believer of "long sleeve Cirno is best Cirno" ever since I saw the art of her in PMiSS because she's an ice fairy, I think it would make sense for her to want to keep herself warm, same reason she has little socks too. Now that I look at it more, her colours are pretty similar to her design in Great Fairy Wars, and honestly I like that, I think keeping her colour palette simple is a good idea so I'm happy about that. I mainly wanted to focus on rendering her wings though, mainly because rendering ice and crystals is fun even though I have done zero studies of them! I also wanted to experiment with rendering her eyes in a similar way to Sanae's, and I like how they turned out! I don't know if I'll continue with this style in the future but it will probably stick around because to me, any stylistically different way of doing eyes is another facial feature I can use to bend the rules of same face syndrome.

While I'm on the topic, I want to mention that the reason Hunter X Hunter's art works so well is because everything is kinda rendered the same. It showed me that if you do everything else consistently in your style (i.e. rendering, lineart, shading), stylizing each character's faces differently will be a lot easier, at least that's how I see it. IDK if I'm ever gonna do drawings of Aya and Ran in this style since I gotta think about them more as well as stop procrastinating lol.

[hexiva]

Roleplay Is Not Dead Nor Doth It Sleep

There's a post going around about how text-based, freeform roleplay is dead, and I was typing up a huge response to this, with an accompanying guide on how to find roleplayer in 2024, when I realized it might have a bigger reach if I made it its own post. So here's that guide.

I hesitate to say that there isn't a problem with the new format of social media making roleplay more difficult to find, but in the desire to make that point, the OP of the original post has left people with the idea that there's no way for them to get into freeform text roleplay in 2024. Which just isn't true! Here, look at all the ways.

Forums

The link to RPG-Directory to find roleplaying forums is a good start. Once you've found a forum RPG, even if you don't join, there's usually an 'advertising' section on that forum where other forum RPGs post their ads - this may help you to find forums that don't advertise on RPG-D.

Another really good forum to find roleplay on is Barbermonger. Barbermonger is focused on connecting people for one-on-one roleplays.

This last one's going to be weird, but it turns out that there are still people seeking roleplay on the Gaia Online forums after all these years. I think this is delightfully retro and then crowd there seems a little older than average. No pre-existing knowledge of Gaia required.

Tumblr

You can also find forum roleplay groups (as well as tumblr and Discord groups) right here on Tumblr. Usually, the thing to do is to use the search function - search for "[genre] rp" or "[fandom] rp" and sort by "latest." (If you sort by Top, you are likely to find dead RPs.) For example, here's fantasy rp, historical rp, and marvel rp. You can also try jcink rp, as most roleplay forums are hosted on Jcink these days, or discord rp, depending on your favored platform.

There are also tumblr blogs specifically dedicated to advertising roleplays. I'm not super familiar with these nowadays, but just in the process of searching those tags above, I found these:

Jcink Tinder

RPG Adverts

RPings

There are more, I just don't know them off the top of my head.

Reddit

Listen, don't run away, I swear it's good now - I swear Reddit is good now -

Reddit is a good place to find Discord roleplays. It's a little heavier on smut-only roleplays than other platforms mentioned here, but it's not impossible to find sexless, plot-based roleplay here either. Most ads are for one on one RP, but you can find groups mixed in here too. The big subreddits for text-based freeform RP seem to be:

r/DiscordRP

r/RoleplayPartnerSearch

r/roleplaying

r/Roleplay

Some of these have weird rules about what you can put in your ad, and I don't remember which ones, so read carefully and don't get discouraged if your ad is initially removed.

Discord

In 2024, Discord is by far the biggest and most popular platform for roleplay, and it has its own native roleplay advertising hubs. Here are a bunch:

roleplay partner hub

Rockin Roleplay

The Roleplay Garden

roleplay help

the roleplay connection

RP Central

Roleplay Central

Roleplay Hub

Barbermonger also has a Discord server

Roleplay Meets: Reborn

RP Hub

The Scribes Guild

DM Rp Village

cherry blossom! roleplay hub

DM-RP

Roleplay Round Table (21+)

The Historical Syndicate (specifically for historical roleplay)

The Roleplayer's Directory

If you can't find the Discord roleplay you want on here, you can also try Discord hub websites, like Disboard. These work similar to tumblr tags - search for [genre] rp or [fandom] rp.

Other

The original post specifically mentions that 'all the old "omegle but for role play" type websites died out ages ago'. This is mostly true, but not quite! There's still Rolechat. It's a little janky, but what it needs more than anything is a bigger user base. Their Discord server is also a good place to find one on one discord roleplay. It is, of course, free, but if you want to support its development, they have a patreon.

Please reblog this post, and add your own tips on how to find roleplay!

[chieltbest]

Big Awful Texture Locator

Download the latest version here

Find any texture in The Sims 2 that is too big, or is 'awful' (suboptimal texture format)

Features:

Find textures in any folder you choose

Filter by width, height, memory size, texture format, or number of mipmap levels

Preview and show details of textures the tool found

Remember 'known good' textures, which are optionally excluded from being shown in the list

Look up the path of the package, and the group and instance of the resource

Copy texture/resource details (right click)

Open the package in the default package editor (double click)

Dark mode/light mode and UI scale adjustable

Native on both Windows and Linux

Why?

The Sims 2 has had a long-standing problem known as 'pink flashing' or 'pink soup' when using too much custom content. The Sims 2 is a 32-bit program, which means that it normally has a maximum memory limit of 2GiB (2048MiB) and by using a so-called '4GB patch' you can raise this limit to -you guessed it- 4GiB, this limit might seem pretty large, but due to how the game works you might hit this limit sooner than expected!

Let's say you have 1024x2048 textures (which is the default for Sims 4 textures, and thus also often for 4to2 cc) in RGBA format, these textures will EACH take up 8MiB of texture memory! This means you could possibly only have only a MAXIMUM of 512 textures loaded in memory before you run out of memory completely. In practice, this limit will probably be lower due to other factors.

This tool will help you find textures that take up too much texture memory, and thus (hopefully) help alleviate some amount of pink flashing.

Tutorial

First, download the program from the link above and follow the instructions to open the program.

Now let's get the program looking the way you want: click on the sun/moon button on the top left of the program to switch light/dark mode and click the "UI Scale" number next to it and enter a new number to change the size of the interface.

Set the folder we want to search: at the top bar, search for the 'Downloads:' bar, then at the end click the button with the folder icon and select your folder. Once you've selected a folder the program will instantly start scanning, if you want to restart this scan then at any time you can click the text in the Downloads bar and press enter.

Currently this list will show all textures in the scan folder, which is probably not very interesting. To find some more interesting textures we can add some filters to the texture list. On the top bar, click on the 'Filter' button: this will open the filter list and it will be empty if you haven't added any filters previously.

These filters filter the texture list one by one, each filter removing more textures from the displayed list of textures. To add a filter, click the plus button, and to remove it click on the trashcan button at the start of the line.

To edit a filter, click on the first box to choose the filter type, click on the second box to choose the type of comparison, and select the number in the last box to set the number to compare with.

The comparison type can be < (smaller than), <= (smaller or equal), > (greater than), >= (greater or equal), == (equal), or != (not equal).

The Format filter is different: make a format filter, then click on the 'choose' button and choose the texture formats that you want to show in the texture list.

Let's edit some textures!

In the texture list, find a texture that you think is too big, and either double click on it to open it in the default package editor or right click on it to show a menu to copy the details of the package.

Finally, once you have the package opened in your favorite package manager, edit the texture to be smaller and/or a better texture format, save and ta-da! your game will now use less texture memory.

[hoshifighting]

ask translation: today's rant, girls, i can't get it out of my head that jeonghan is totally that "friend" who sends you a message a second after you remove the @ of your last relationship from your bio. "baby, I saw that you deleted his @, did something happen? Is everything okay? you know you can talk about anything with your hannie, right?" "wow, what an jerk, do you want to come over today, princess?" WARNINGS: smut, fingering, doggy-style, friend!jeonghan, recent break-up

PORTUGUESE VERSION

it’s a matter of seconds. you barely take his @ out of your bio, and the “ding” from your phone already notifies you. guess who? that’s right—jeonghan. and you know exactly what he’s going to say before you even open the message. it’s almost automatic; his timing is so damn perfect that you almost think he’s been stalking your profile, waiting for the smallest slip-up, a little sign.

“hey, baby,” he starts, casual as ever, “saw you took his name out of your bio… something happened?” you read it and can practically see his smug little smile while he’s typing, just loving the drama. “tsk, motherfucker,” you mutter to yourself, but you’re laughing. then he follows up: “you know you can tell your hannie anything, right?”

you roll your eyes, but ignoring him? impossible. the next message doesn’t even let you hesitate.

“god, what an idiot. wanna come over tonight, princess? got that wine you love…”

and there he’s got you. he knows it. he knows that the “heart-to-heart” is just a flimsy excuse, you know what he wants, and that “motherfucker” you muttered? already forgotten. the worst part is you don’t even resist. you’re already texting back before you can think twice:

“give me fifteen. actually have the wine, or i’m out,” you shoot back, adding that little side-eye emoji he always teases you for.

not even five seconds later, he replies: “bet.”

at his place, things start slow—he hands you the glass and goes, “spill it all, babe.” you actually try talking about your ex, maybe add some drama for effect… but he cuts you off, saying he doesn’t wanna hear about that “loser,” and before you know it, the conversation’s become something else entirely. he teases you, like always, and it doesn’t take long before that “friendly” vibe slips into something much more serious.

the wine might as well have gone straight between your legs. minutes later, jeonghan’s there, face buried between your thighs, his mouth working over the wet clit while he keeps his eyes locked on yours. he makes it look like an art form, taking his time, slow, drawing you out more and more—and you, impatient as hell, nearly losing it every time he stops just to throw in some little comment. he lifts his head slightly, lips glistening, with that smug glint in his eye.

“how could he lose you, huh?” he’s not actually asking; he just wants to see you needier. you press your thighs against him, trying to make him shut up and eat you out, but he just laughs, naughty.

“god, you’re so impatient, knew you’d be like this…” he knows exactly the effect he has on you.

you let out a frustrated moan, and he laughs again—he’s clearly feeding off this. “relax, princess, not gonna leave you hanging.” he says it, but he doesn’t speed up. you’re practically begging by the time he finally decides to quit playing games.

he fucks you so good that if you’d known it would always be like this with him, the idea of dating anyone but jeonghan would’ve never even crossed your mind.

he’s got you on all fours on his couch, no mercy, thrusting deep with that thick cock, your cries coming out rough and strained, head tilted back as he holds nothing back, fingers gripping your hair just to make you scream his name louder. the angle leaves your gasps sounding suffered, desperate.

jeonghan, obviously, is eating this up. he notices when you’re already dripping all over his couch, and just to make it even worse, he gathers up that little drip and rubs it right on your sensitive clit, making you melt like jelly, your body going limp on his couch until he eases his grip on your hair so he doesn’t hurt you.

he moans shamelessly, the sound probably even louder than yours, and it catches you off guard. he doesn’t hold back, telling you how long he’s wanted this, how many times he’s dreamed about fucking you exactly like this.

“you have no idea how long i’ve wanted this pretty pussy, baby…” he whispers, and you feel that delicious shiver on the back of your neck. “if you hadn’t picked that dumbass… we could’ve been fucking like this ages ago.”

he thrusts deeper, but moving slower, just so you can feel every inch as he murmurs in your ear. his touch is firm, fingers gliding down to squeeze that sensitive spot, giving it a playful pinch just to watch you shiver, rolling your eyes as you gasp out his name.

“this is what you wanted, princess? gonna appear here on my place, begging for my cock again.. and im going to give you what you want... always.”

[postcardsfromheapside]

Okay. Listen. I'm only going to engage with this in good faith once.

Veilguard was never going to be like BG3.

BG3 is a great game for what it is, but no DA game allows you to pick the evil ending, thus there is no reason to allow you to get rid of companions in VG like in BG3 or in previous DA games.

In prior games, you may have been able to eliminate other companions from your team, or not recruit them altogether, because they were not crucial to the overall goal, and all you would miss is story/lore. Nothing breaks in the story/game if those companions leave/are killed/don't get recruited, it merely pivots.

This is completely different in Veilguard, where Varric has taken knowledge and insight and started to develop a specific strike team to take down Solas.

Hold my hand.

There is not a world where the Veil comes down and things "continue". I know a lot of Solas fans think there is...but there isn't. A robust explanation of why the Veil should NOT come down can be found here.

If the Veil comes down, everything ends. Ignoring the real world happenings at EA, if your end worldstate in VG is "world drowned in demons," there's nothing to move on to. No reason to play another DA game, were we to ever have another. Your world state is "game over."

Rook therefore *must* be the cooperative kind of person who is ultimately working toward keeping the Veil up, whatever the cost. It would really help a LOT of you to stop thinking about Rook as a "hero", and start thinking of them more as a project manager.

Remember, Varric already had the goal of "stop Solas" and specifically recruited Rook because they had qualities best suited to help with that, and Rook agreed because "world drowned in demons" is bad. So when Rook inherits the management position from Varric, they come pre-loaded with 1) a goal, and 2) the mindset to get it the fuck done (because there really is no other option, it's succeed or die, a fact mentioned more than once in dialogue with NPC's).

What Rook builds by bringing on team members is a strike force in order to achieve this goal. And here's my point: if you do not have these necessary companions, you do not make it to end game. The way the story is set up, removing any of the companions before Tearstone Island effectively sets the team up to fail horribly. The story doesn't move forward. The world is blighted. End series. Rook is highly motivated to be cooperative with these companions and their factions.

This is why it's a poor excuse to say that it would "add narrative tension" if Rook were able to be mean to their companions and risk losing them. Nothing is added narratively by a companion leaving. If they leave, at some point shortly after The Leaving, the story will end abruptly in Blight.

Rook is therefore not going to do things to cause the companions to leave, because their goal is "stop Solas/stop the gods/stop the blight" and to do that, Rook needs these people. Now, you can make the choice not to do the faction or personal quests along the way toward that goal, and ultimately those companions might fall in the final battle, but the story is not going to let you remove those companions before then. Because the story is not about a choice between "Veil-falling/World-blighted, or Rook being a hero." The story is many things ON THE WAY to stopping the the Veil from falling, one way or another.

Now, I know a lot of these "I wish we could be meaner" comments 99.9% of the time come about because people do not like particular companions, so this was all probably a waste of typing. And my answer to "I just don't like this person" is "too fucking bad, I don't like all my coworkers either, try growing up" or "maybe you should try not being a bigot," depending on the way the "I don't like this person" is phrased. But I also think some of you just really do not understand how story/games structure works, and you're familiar with very specific kinds of media, and it's upsetting you to have to wrap your mind around something new.

If you REALLY want to explore a blighted world, that's what fanfiction is for. Go bug nuts. I don't think it's going to be a compelling story, but you might surprise me.

Also, while we're talking about "tension":

I'm begging you to consider that one of the greater sources of tension can arise because you, the player, are literally watching a tragedy unfold. You cannot stop it, you know what's going to happen, you know what choices you're going to have to make, and you have to make them anyway, and they're going to hurt you in some way or another, and you, the player/reader, know what the characters do not. The tension comes from watching the different permutations of grief unfold across the screen and inside of you. None of the companions have to be in conflict with each other in order for this to happen.

[literaryvein-reblogs]

A Few More Writing Notes for your Sex Scenes

Whether your long-term relationship is in a rut, or you're looking for a way to connect with a new partner, sex games are a fun way to add some steamy novelty to your sex life.

Sex Games for Couples to Play

To get the most out of these sexy games, both of you should go in with a positive attitude and a willingness to try new sexual activities. Here are some sex games that may spice things up between you and your partner.

“Out of bed” sex checklist: For this game, commit to having sex in a different location either inside or outside your home for an entire month. The one rule is that the location can’t be your bed. Then every time you have sex, alternate who chooses the location. You may be surprised at how a change of scenery sparks your sexual creativity.

Sex dice: For this classic couple’s sex game, all you need is a pair of dice that will give you a sexy action (i.e. “lick,” “suck,” “nibble”) and a number of sexy body parts (i.e. “nipples,” “ear,” “neck”). Just purchase a pair of sex dice, role the dice, and do what they tell you to do.

Kinky truth or dare: For this kinky spin on the classic game Truth or Dare, all you have to do is make every truth and every dare sexual in nature. If selecting a dare for your partner, think of something that pushes them slightly out of their comfort zone like role play or a striptease performance. When asking for a truth, use it as an opportunity to learn about your partner's sexual fantasies. For example, you could ask "What untraditional sex position have you always wanted to try?" or "Tell me something that turns you on that I don't already know about."

Yes/No/Maybe: Making a “Yes/No/Maybe” list with your partner is exactly what it sounds like: a list of sexual activities that you can mark “Yes” (I definitely want to do this), “No” (I definitely do not want to do this), or “Maybe” (I’m not sure if I’d enjoy this, but I’m open to talking more about it and maybe trying it). You should each fill out a “Yes/No/Maybe” list separately and then compare to see where your sexual fantasies overlap. Here's a small sample of items to consider adding to your list: BDSM, mutual masturbation, nipple play, oral sex, anal sex, role-playing, dirty talk, dressing up, spanking, vibrator usage, dildo usage, and threesomes.

Honey hunt: This game is perfect for couples who have a sweet tooth and don't mind getting a little messy. To play, blindfold your partner and pour a small spot of honey anywhere on your body. It's your partner's job to find the honey, but they're only allowed to use their tongue. As they search for the honey, your partner may discover new erogenous zones on your body. This game can get sticky so when you're done playing, clean each other off with some shower sex.

Sex toy surprise: To play “sex toy surprise,” gather all your sex toys in a large bag, blindfold you or your partner, and pick one out of the bag to use during foreplay. Feel free to keep the blindfold on after you make your selection.

Strip games: You can turn any card game or board game into a sex game if you just alter the rules so that the loser has to remove a piece of clothing. Strip poker is the most popular strip game and you only need a classic deck of playing cards to play.

Sex Toy - any object or device made to enhance sexual pleasure or facilitate an orgasm. When safely used, sex toys can bring an entirely new element to a sexual encounter. There are several different types of sex toys, and each is designed for a unique form of pleasure.

Types of Sex Toys

Sex toys come in many shapes and sizes, but they typically fall within 7 categories.

Vibrators: These sex toys use vibration patterns to stimulate different parts of your body. External vibrators include clitoral stimulators like bullet vibrators and wands, which enhance pleasure around the clitoris and labia. Internal vibrators are shaped for comfortable vaginal and anal penetration. They usually include several vibration modes, so you can find the right intensity for you. Combination vibrators like rabbit vibrators include both internal and external functions. Rabbits are hybrid sex toys that allow for penatration while simultaneously simulating your clit.

Anal toys: Some sex toys are specifically designed to stimlute the nerve endings in your anus. Examples of anal toys include butt plugs, prostate massagers, and anal beads. The important thing to look for when choosing an anal toy is a flared base. This wider base ensures that the toy doesn’t accidentally slip inside your anus. Since the anus doesn’t naturally lubricate itself, anal toys require a lot of lubrication. Don’t forget to clean your anal toy after each use, especially if you’re sharing the toy with a partner or plan to use it on another part of your body.

BDSM gear: BDSM toys can enhance sexual pleasure by allowing for dominant and submissive roleplaying. If you are new to bondage, consider buying a pair of handcuffs, a blindfold, or wrist and ankle restraints. These simple items can add an exciting element to your sexual encounters by forcing you to focus on every physical sensation. If you enjoy erotic spanking, consider using a paddles, whips, or ticklers. When using BDSM gear, always be sure to have an agreed-upon safe word that you can use if you are ever feeling uncomfortable. Trust and communication are key for good bondage play.

Dildos: One of the most popular types of sex toys, dildo are often phallic in shape. They are designed to comfortably penetrate a vagina, anus, or mouth. Dildos come in many shapes and sizes, but they are often textured with pleasurable ribs or bumps and made out of silicone, glass, and even steel. If you are having solo sex, consider buying a dildo with a suction cup base that you can attach to a wall for hand-free use.

Cock rings: These toys wrap around the base of your penis to stop blood flow back into the body, which can help maintain and enhance an erection. Some cock rings wrap around the scrotum to apply extra pressure. The safest cock rings are made from a soft material like silicone, but they also come in materials like titanium or stainless steel. Vibrating cock rings can enhance sexual pleasure for the wearer and provide clitoral stimulation for a partner. Only wear a cock ring for brief sessions, and take it off immediately if it causes you any pain.

Harnesses: Harnesses allow you to attach a dildo to your body for strap-on play. Use a strap-on for penetrative sex, either vaginal or anal. Harnesses are often fit like underwear, but some have straps that tie around your thighs. You may also wear a harness for bondage purposes. For optimal mobility during sex, be sure to keep your harness snug and your dildo tightly attached.

Sex furniture: Constructed for intimacy, sex furniture can help you position your body in a way that is otherwise difficult or uncomfortable. A wedge pillow is an easy way to lift your pelvis and hold a good position for penetration. Other examples of sex furniture include sex swings, lounge chairs, and shower grips. If you’ve been struggling with a particular sex position, consider getting a piece of sex furniture to support you.

BDSM - a blanket term for a wide variety of erotic practices and kinks built upon power dynamics between consenting sexual partners.

“BDSM” is a combination of acronyms that stands for three similar but distinct communities that use power imbalance for sexual pleasure:

Bondage and discipline (B/D), domination and submission (D/s), and sadism and masochism (S/M).

In general, BDSM involves one partner acting in the dominant role (or “dom”), while the other embodies the submissive role (or “sub”) as they both act out consensual fantasies.

Both partners receive sexual pleasure and satisfaction from performing their role (whether dominant or submissive) during the sexual encounter.

Other “kinky” communities based on nonconforming sexual interests or fetishism are often included within the BDSM community, including those with rubber or leather fetishes or people who enjoy animal roleplay, where one partner takes on the role of an animal or pet.

Types of BDSM

BDSM is an umbrella term for many sexual preferences within the erotic community, all of which interact and overlap in various ways. The most common subcultures include:

Bondage play: Bondage is a sexual practice in which tools are used to restrain one partner during a sexual encounter. The most common restraints include rope, leather straps, bondage tape, ties, handcuffs, spreader bars, ball gags, blindfolds, and chains. These restraints aim to restrict the subject’s senses or freedom of movement to place control in the other partner’s hands and heighten mutual sexual stimulation.

Discipline: In the discipline community, the dominant partner will set rules that the submissive partner obeys. These rules can be sexual in nature (like requiring oral sex at particular times) or indirectly erotic (like forbidding speaking out of turn). If the submissive partner breaks a rule, the dominant partner will assign punishment, including withholding pleasure, inflicting pain (from spanking to flogging), or assigning additional rules. Both partners experience sexual pleasure in discipline roleplay.

Dominance and submission: Dominance and submission focus on the flow of power and energy between partners. In general, one partner dominates the other physically, mentally, emotionally, or sexually during a particular encounter (often called a “scene” or “session”), exploring the submissive partner’s desires, thoughts, and feelings and guiding the couple toward mutual pleasure. BDSM practitioners who like to switch between dominant and submissive roles in a relationship or even undergo a power exchange during a single encounter are known as “switches.” D/s often incorporates specific outfits or attire to be used during a scene—for instance, leather outfits, maid costumes, collars, leashes, and riding crops.

Sadomasochism: Sadomasochism is a community in which individuals derive sexual pleasure and a rush of endorphins from inflicting or receiving pain (always consensually). Those who enjoy inflicting this pain are known as sadists, while those who enjoy feeling this pain are called masochists. The pain inflicted can be physical (with whips, clamps, paddles, or electric stimulation) or emotional (through humiliation or total submission).

Tips for Practicing BDSM Safely

If you want to experiment with BDSM for the first time but are unsure where to start, here are a few tips to make sure your experiences are safe, consensual, and fun:

Set ground rules with your partner. To engage in healthy BDSM play, you and your partner should both agree on what you’re comfortable with before you begin—nobody should feel pressured into a particular role or feel as if they don’t have a choice. Have an open and honest dialogue with your partner about the roles you’re each drawn toward so that you both feel comfortable and confident experimenting. If you’re too nervous about bringing it up directly and you’re curious about your partner’s interest levels, consider watching light BDSM erotica together to broach the subject.

Select a safe word. Trust and mutual consent between one or more partners are the foundation of BDSM. However, it may be hard to distinguish between playful banter and an honest request to slow down or stop the experience in the middle of a session. Every BDSM practitioner should establish at least one safe word with their partner—something either person can say to signal that a boundary has been crossed and a break is necessary. Additionally, you and your partner can choose two different safe words—one that signals a stop in action and another that signals you’re coming close to a boundary and should ease off or move the session in a different direction.

Brainstorm roleplaying ideas. If you’re unsure how to begin a BDSM relationship with your partner or feeling self-conscious, consider some roleplay scenarios that can help jumpstart the action. Boss and employee, teacher and student, doctor and patient, or two strangers are all roles that you can take on to help distance yourself from the situation, which can be a great way to help you get over stage fright so that you can relax and enjoy yourself.

Start small. If you’re new to BDSM, avoid buying a complicated rope system or a fancy leather outfit. Instead, let yourself ease in to see if this form of sex play suits you and your partner. Try light BDSM activities for starters; many discipline or D/s sessions only require two willing participants and some imagination. If you want to buy equipment, a blindfold and some wrist restraints are useful, inexpensive items that you can continue to use if you determine that hardcore BDSM activities are not for you.

Understand risk. There are two main schools of thought regarding how to treat risk during sessions—the “safe, sane, and consensual” model (SSC) and the “risk-aware consensual kink” model (RACK). Those who follow the SSC model emphasize safety, sticking to activities that you and your partner have designated as “safe” beforehand. Those who follow the RACK model believe that the word “safe” is problematic because most BDSM activities are inherently risky and that emphasizing safety takes away participants’ freedom to evaluate risk on their own or engage in higher-risk BDSM play. For those who follow the RACK model, the responsibility to determine risk and comfort is with each individual—making explicit consent even more crucial.

Aftercare is key. Many sexual activities—and BDSM sessions in particular—can be physically or emotionally intense for both participants, so partners must engage in healthy aftercare following the sexual experience. Discussion, cuddling, and cleaning up together are great ways to help everyone wind down and process the session, fostering a sense of calm, physical wellness, and emotional well-being.

Erotic Spanking - a type of impact play in which a person uses their hands, whip, paddle, crop, or flagger to spank parts of their partner’s body for consensual and mutual sexual pleasure.

Spanking is a light BDSM activity often used as foreplay before sexual intercourse or a kinky warm up during domination play.

Receiving an erotic spanking can increase blood flow in the groin area and releases pleasurable chemicals in the brain, including endorphins and dopamine, to enhance sexual pleasure.

Types of Erotic Spanking

In spanking role-play, each partner performs the part of a character—the spanking recipient will typically take on a submissive role, while the other partner performs a dominant one.

Domestic discipline is a practice between two consenting partners where the dominant partner uses spanking or corporal punishment to call out their submissive partner’s unwanted behaviors (which may have been performed intentionally in order to get spanked).

Self-spanking is when a person spanks their own body for sexual pleasure.

Ways to Practice Erotic Spanking

There are several different ways that couples and individuals can use erotic spanking in their sexual play:

Clothed or unclothed: You can spank or receive a spanking fully clothed, completely naked, or in various states of undress. Some people own special spanking outfits like chaps or a spanking skirt, which have unique cutouts around the buttocks to allow for easier spanking.

Over the knee: The prototypical position for spanking is when the receiving partner lies across the lap or over the spanking partner’s knee, with their buttocks in the air. However, many other positions offer easy access to the buttocks. For example, the receiving partner can lie on their stomach on the bed, or both partners can stand upright. Some people may invest in a spanking bench or spanking horse, a four-legged piece of furniture that the receiving partner lies on during spanking.

With the hand: The hands are the most common spanking tool. Some practitioners prefer to spank using their bare hands because they can also feel the impact on their palms and fingers.

With a spanking tool: Spanking tools can provide more impact or cover a greater surface area. Paddles, whips, riding crops, floggers, hairbrushes, belts, and canes are popular implements to use for spanking.

With bondage: Spanking falls under the umbrella of BDSM, which also includes other activities like bondage and domination. Many people like to combine spanking with these activities to enhance sexual arousal—for instance, tying up the receiving partner for a submissive BDSM spanking experience.

With role-play: Some couples use spanking as a role-playing element, acting out situations where the spanker is the dominant partner and the spankee needs to be punished with a spanking session.

Erotic Spanking Tips

If you want to try an erotic spanking session in the bedroom, here are some useful tips for beginners:

Choose a safe word. Different people respond differently to spanking—while some may find it immensely pleasurable, others may dislike it entirely or enjoy it only briefly before they’re ready to move on. To ensure that you and your partner have an open line of sexual communication, choose a memorable, safe word before you start so that if one of you needs to stop, you can use the word to end the session and take a break.

Start gently. Everyone has different sensitivity levels, and it’s important to listen to your partner to see what feels best for them. When starting with erotic spanking, the spanker should begin with gentle spanks—then, if your partner asks for more or harder impact, you can gradually increase the intensity. Easing into the spanking can help both of you discover your preferences.

Experiment with sensations. If you’re spanking with your hand, you can try different angles and styles to see what feels best. For instance, the palm offers a deeper thud, while the fingers can create more of a stinging sensation. Other spanking tools can provide new sensations—a paddle can cover more surface area with each impact, while a riding crop concentrates on a particular spot. Aftercare is also important—rubbing the spankee’s buttocks after a few spanks can extend the duration of the sensations and further increase the pleasure.

Pay attention to all four zones. The buttocks have four different zones that respond differently to spanking: the tops by your lower back, the sides near your hips, the undersides, and the fleshy center dome. When spanking, give each zone some attention, which will also help provide other zones with relief. As you ramp up the sexual arousal, focus most of the spanking on the underside zone, which will send vibrations up to your partner’s genital area for the most pleasure.

Go solo. You don’t need a partner to enjoy spanking. Add in some erotic spanking during a masturbation session—being on all fours or even standing up are both good positions to give you easy access to your buttocks area. If you’re having a hard time reaching, consider using a paddle or other spanking tool.

Sources: 1 2 3 4 ⚜ More: Notes & References ⚜ Writing Resources PDFs

[kannouo]

Feeling Faint

fandom: obey me pairing: demon brothers x gn!reader warnings: drug mention in satan's part, emetophobia in asmo's part summary: the brothers reacting to an mc with low blood pressure and hypermobility. prompt by anon: hihi! would you write obey me brothers headcannons where the mc has medical issues-but in the sense where they'll be like "oh yeah im gonna pass out rq give me a minute" after standing up, and like hypermobility so they just over extend their joints unknowingly and its more likely to break? just a stupid idea i thought of bcuz clearly if it concerns some humans it would freak out demons A/N: ofc I can do that — to add to the hcs, i went with the idea that the medical issues are caused by low blood pressure and added some other symptoms. i kept the hypermobility and did a bit of research but i didnt go too in-depth in these hcs for fear of getting anything wrong. i dont struggle with either of these things personally and am in no way an expert, if i did anything seriously wrong please let me know!!

LUCIFER

• ...Concerned.

• So, Demons are by no means impervious to illness. But the types of conditions that plague demonkind are much different to what humans experience. A human cold would have no effect on a demon, but a demon cold could outright kill a human — to impact their immune systems, the illness has to be a particularly strong one, you see. Due to this, I imagine none of the brothers have much experience with how truly fragile human bodies can be.

• In preparation for the exchange program, Lucifer had, of course, changed a lot of things around the House of Lamentation to be more human-friendly. He did his research, too. Plants that are harmless to demons but extremely toxic to humans were removed. The literally boiling temperatures that the water in the house could get to was taken care of. He made sure that all food stocked in the fridge and cabinets was safe for human consumption. The entire place was essentially baby-proofed to guarantee as little injury as possible.

• What he didn't predict or account for was that your own body could be working against you.

• The first time you stand up too fast and nearly collapse, he assumes you've fallen ill and asks you repeatedly to give him a rundown of everything you've eaten and everywhere you've been just to make sure he didn't accidentally leave some kind of cursed item out. Is so confused when you explain to him that this isn't a temporary affliction, and it's just something you deal with all the time.

• Not sure if he initially believes you when you tell him it isn't a big deal.

• He obviously does his research and calms himself down. Learns it isn't life-threatening and takes care to note down any treatment options you might need.

• That, and he's surprisingly calm about your hypermobility. If he sees you over-extending your joints without even realising, he points it out quickly and tells you to stop. "I know it feels normal, but it isn't."

• Predictably a stickler about if you're doing strengthening exercises or taking medication if you need any. Every morning, whether you took your medicine or did the necessary exercises is the first thing he asks you, and he cannot be lied to. If you don't set an alarm, he'll be your alarm.

"Good morning, MC." You nearly jump right out of your skin hearing Lucifer's voice as soon as you turned to close your bedroom door. You spin around, but before you can ask how he just appeared without making a sound, he continues, "did you finish your stretches?" You look at him. He looks right back at you. After a beat too long of silence, he sighs and gestures to your bedroom. "Back inside. Do it properly." "Yes, sir."

MAMMON

• Another concerned guy, but... less knowledgeable. The first time you nearly stumbled to the ground out of nowhere he, for just the slightest of moments, thought you'd dropped dead for literally no reason. Scariest fucking millisecond of his life.

• Especially with your hypermobility, Mammon would somewhat struggle to wrap his head around the concept of something that can't just be cured. It can be treated, sure, but you can't get rid of it? Like at all?? I thought you guys had doctors in the human world???

"So you just... deal with this for the rest of your life?" "Mammon, it really isn't that big of a deal." You say, trying in vain to reassure him. He's been staring straight ahead with his elbows on his knees and hands clasped in front of his face for a few minutes now, and you're worried he's having some sort of crisis. "It doesn't even affect me that much in my day-to-day life. It's treatable." "But, like..." He sighs exasperatedly and places his head in his hands. "For the rest of your life, though?"

• Initial confusion aside, he never quite gets over the initial panic he feels whenever you become faint, dizzy or nauseous. No matter how chill you are about it, he makes sure to balance you out with pure blind panic.

• Not that he's any better with your habit of over-extending. Unlike Lucifer, who calmly and politely reminds you to relax your joints, Mammon will freak out at you and ask you how in the fuck that doesn't hurt and even be convinced you've broken something if you're extending far enough.

• On that note, if you do actually break something, he's probably the first one to know because of how he hovers around you 24/7. Expect to never be left alone ever again.

• He tries to remind you to do stretches or take your medicine, but the problem is that he forgets that stuff too. He'll bring it up on the rare occasion that he does remember and then pester you into doing it, raving on and on the whole time about how you're hopeless without him here to tell you what to do.

LEVIATHAN

• Like I said, demons don't really get conditions like this. Their bodies and immune systems don't function the way humans do. And that's lucky for him too because, if they did, this guy would be deficient in things we don't even have names for yet.

• But, he's a demon and therefore immune to these human ailments. LMAO sucks to be you.

• Levi is another one who has a panic response. The difference between him and Mammon is that he can logically understand that your conditions aren't life-changing and that they're easily treatable and that he doesn't have to worry, but the illogical part of his mind takes charge in situations where he experiences you feeling the effects of your medical issues.

• You can absolutely talk to him about your treatment plan and the way your low blood pressure and hypermobility impacts you without him freaking out about it. He listens and understands just fine. But then he actually sees you dealing with fatigue and headaches or with your elbow in a weird position and all logic goes flying out the window.

"Your arm's broken." You turn your head at the sound of Levi's voice. His eyes are wide, his entire body stiff in shock, but the way he said it was so matter-of-fact that for a moment you believed he must be right. You look down at your arm, elbow stretched a little too far forward to be normal. "Your arm's broken!" You fix your arm's position, but before you can inform Levi of the misunderstanding, he's already pacing around his room. "W—what do I do?! How'd you break your arm by sitting?! M—my medical dramas didn't prepare me for this...! Oh no, oh no, oh no, Lucifer's gonna kill me... W—wait, that's it! Karon, call Lucifer—!" "Levi stop, don't—"

• While you weren't hurt that day after all, you're about 70% sure that Levi's frantic phone call to Lucifer claiming that you'd broken a bone nearly gave him whatever the demon version of a heart attack is.

• Would really like to imagine himself as the sweet, romantic type who could catch you when you're about to collapse and carry you off to bed. The problem is, though he probably can catch you before you fall, he'll then realise with horror your close proximity and ends up dropping you to the ground in a fluster anyway. He's not built for the anime romance life.

SATAN

• I was going to reference the "chill guy" meme here but realised that Satan is the complete opposite of a Chill Guy.

• Still though, he is overall the most reasonable about this when he first learns about it.

• Also, unlike Levi, he is literally the protagonist of a romance manga. He will catch you in his arms before you fall, lovingly brush your hair out of your face and ask if you're hurt. He's just built different. And he practices this kind of shit in the mirror.

• He'll probably ask you about the specific kind of symptoms you experience. It's likely he's read some obscure book on human illnesses, so he has nothing but good intentions; he's asking to see if he can recall or look for anything written in those books that can serve as remedies. The only problem is that they aren't written by humans.

"I recall reading that fairy dust can be used to ease pain in human bodies, and even as a source of medication in the past." You give Satan a puzzled look. 'Fairy dust'? Used to ease pain, a source of medication?... There's no way he's referring to what you think he's referring to, right? You stare at him for a moment longer. He stares right back, returning your quizzical expression with his own, as if he didn't just say the most disorienting thing you've ever heard. "Like..." You start, tentatively lowering your voice. "...Drugs?" "What? No. Actual fairy dust. Are you insane?" You feel like that raises way more questions than drugs.

• That's not to say he's unwilling to learn. If you tell him his information is outdated or straight up inaccessible to humanity, he'll listen to your explanation of your treatment process and do more research in his own time.

• He will also frequently remind you to do your stretches and exercises and take any necessary medicine. If you have a routine for your exercises, he'll probably actually join you in them. He sits around reading all day, he probably needs it, his fucking back man.

• Like Lucifer, he will calmly but pointedly tell you to stop over-extending your joints when he catches you doing it.

ASMODEUS

• Also relatively normal about it because, out of all the brothers, he's had the most experience with humanity outside of sorcerers and witches. I don't think he's particularly knowledgeable about this sort of thing, but he is at least aware that it exists, and of the simple fact that the human body can be afflicted by many different things.

• You mention the hypermobility to him and he doesn't really... get it at first. "Oh, I'm flexible too! ♡" he says, then you nearly dislocate your shoulder in front of him and it finally clicks that this isn't cool or sexy. He understands eventually, don't worry.

• Maybe a hot take here but I honestly can't imagine Asmo as squeamish. So if your low blood pressure gives you an upset stomach, he has no problem holding your hair back as you throw up in the bathroom. He gets shitfaced drunk with his club friends every other night. It's probably nothing new to him.

• Asmo is a naturally very comforting presence when he wants to be. He has plenty of remedies for lightheaded-ness and pain relief that he's more than willing to share with you. That, and he's one for words of affirmation, so he turns to praising and reassuring you through the whole process.

"You poor thing. Humans really are fragile." Asmo coos, affectionately threading his fingers through your hair as you slowly sip the peppermint tea he prepared for you. "Hopefully you'll feel better by tonight. I would hate for you to lose out on your beauty sleep." "Sorry," you hoarse out, throat scratchy and raw. You feel disgusting, your stomach still spinning in circles and your body covered in a thin layer of sweat. He frowns at you. "Don't be silly. You didn't choose for this to happen, did you?" He kisses the top of your head and smiles. "Don't worry! Asmo's here to make you feel allll better."

• Joins you in doing your stretches/exercises too, but his motivations are a little different from Satan's.

• Like Mammon, if you do actually injure yourself, Asmo is unlikely to leave you on your own for a long time afterwards. Throughout your recovery, he'll insist on being your personal nurse, and even after that, he'll continue to hover around you as you go about your daily business. This causes him to butt heads with Mammon who does the exact same thing. Whether this is annoying or entertaining is up to you.

BEELZEBUB

• "It's because you aren't eating the right things."

• I don't necessarily think Beel would be dismissive or wilfully ignorant, but there is literally a part in the OG game where he claims that the reason humans are so physically weak compared to demons is because they don't eat enough, and don't eat the right things. At first, this is absolutely what he'd think is causing your issues.

• The reason you randomly feel light-headed or like you're going to faint must be because of how starved you are. Here, he got you an entire pizza.

• Obviously, he will learn with time. But his fixation on this being hunger-related can actually come in handy for your low blood pressure if eating salty snacks can help make you feel better. He's always got something on hand.

• When it comes to your exercises, he also won't realise initially that it's exercises and stretches specifically designed to help with your condition and not just a general workout similar to what he does. He'll try to give you tips, but it's some Saitama-level training bullshit. He's not super familiar with just how much weaker human bodies are compared to his own.

"MC?" You lift your head at the sound of your name being called, your eyes landing on Beel in a black tank-top. By the way his hoodie is nowhere to be seen, you assume he's dressed for a workout. "I'm going for a run. Do you want to come? It might be good for you." "A run?" The idea of a quiet jog all alone with Beel crosses your mind. You're sure he only intends to help you strengthen yourself, but there's nothing wrong with turning it into a little romantic outing, you think. "How far?" "An easy 700 miles should be fine for a warm-up—" "Never-mind."

• Until you tell him to stop, he has a habit of not telling you when your hypermobility is making your joints stretch in unnatural positions, but instead just silently fixing it himself. He'll take your arm and re-position it to rest normally.

• Also, no need to worry about injuries with this guy around. It won't happen. He reacts faster than you can even process. You suddenly feel dizzy one day and nearly fall right down the stairs, only for him to grab you by the back of your shirt and very unceremoniously hold you in the air like that.

• You appreciate it, but you'd appreciate it even more if he could pick you up with any amount of dignity.

BELPHEGOR

• Similar to his twin, he has his own initial assumptions as to what's causing this.

• "You should just sleep more." And to be fair, sometimes sleeping it off does help with the more nauseating symptoms, but it really isn't useful advice for when you need to start on your stretches in the morning. Sleeping won't magically make your bones stronger.

• He's the least likely to be around enough to prevent any injuries if you get any, but he is pretty good for the recovery period. He's just about as much of a stickler for you getting the proper amount of rest as Lucifer is about you doing your exercises. Plus, given his powers of sloth, he can send you to sleep with a single touch and give you pleasant dreams to help you through any pain or nausea you may be experiencing.

• Not gonna lie, I feel like Belphie is a little freaked out whenever he sees you over-extending your joints. He won't voice it or anything, but he does find it creepy. Asmo's hyper-flexibility is already unnerving to him, so seeing you bend your joints in ways that cannot be normal is something he can't look at for too long.

• Don't crack your knuckles in front of him, he will think you just broke both of your hands and is horrified.

• He won't join you in your stretches but he will watch you do them and critique from the side-lines like an asshole. I love him I swear.

"Your back's not straight enough." You look over your shoulder at the sound of Belphie's voice. He's looking at you, exercise reference sheet in hand, the rest of his body still firmly tucked into bed. You swear you feel your eye twitch. "How about you fucking do it?" Admittedly, the balancing exercises had already taken a bit out of you, so your patience was thinner than normal. He didn't seem offended, given that his response was to yawn dramatically and turn over. "Too tired."

• Lowkey, and this is a little mean so only if you're up for it... use your condition as a ploy to get out of things. Pretend to faint in the middle of gym class and he'll so kindly volunteer to take you to the nurse's office himself. Act like your joints are in a lot of pain on a day where you have to take a test and ask Belphie to stay home with you because he's the best for your recovery.

• It's not like Lucifer can accuse you of pretending, you literally have diagnoses, asshole.

[themdera]

George Clarke replied to your story.

2,172 words. Green circle. Red Circle. what’s the difference?

It all started a few weeks ago when George had posted a random Instagram Story asking fans to add him to their close friends lists so he could rank them for a YouTube video—“best, funniest, cringiest, whatever,” he’d promised with that ridiculous smile. Your group chat had of course collectively lost their minds.

“Oh my God, we have to do this,” someone had declared, already tagging him in a story.

You’d rolled your eyes at first. Sure, George was funny, creative, and admittedly attractive, but you weren’t about to feed his ego by crafting some elaborate story just for his amusement. Still, in the chaos of everyone else freaking out, you’d ended up adding him anyway. Not to make the cut for his video—you didn’t post anything remotely funny or interesting enough—but just to shut the groupchat up. And honestly, you forgot to remove him after.

Then came the thirst trap.

It wasn’t even planned. You’d been bored, playing around with some poses, when your friends dared you to post something from the many photos you’d sent them, a simple selfie where the light hits your face and hair in the perfect way, just to mess with people. It had been a joke, like everything else on your close friends, and you’d captioned it, “This one’s for just you ;)” to really sell the bit.

No one actually expected him to see it.

But George Clarke, the man with an unbelievably high screen time, saw everything. The notification came in mere minutes after you posted it. GeorgeClarkeey replied to your story

“Me?” one word. That was all it took.

“Girls” You typed very quickly

Cue the group chat imploding.

“WHAT DID YOU DO?!” your friend types back know the message “Girls” meant something had happened.

“George replied to my story”

“HE WHAT?”

“He’s going to think it’s serious.”

“Can we talk about how he responded in record time???”

“He’s going to make this a thing. I feel it in my soul.”

The replies came in at record speed. Sure enough, George wasn’t done yet.

Another message popped up while you were still processing the first: “Wait. That was for me, right? Like… actually?”

You groaned, tossing your phone onto your bed. What the hell was going on? George Clarke had a talent for this shit, and now you were directly in the middle of it. Of course it wasn’t specifically for him. It was a joke, a dumb joke fueled by group chat dares and late-night boredom. But now George Clarke was in your DMs, actually engaging, and you had no idea how to navigate this.

You sat down on your bed , unlocking your phone to stare at his messages through your notifications like they might explode if you opened them. What the hell were you supposed to say to that?

“Me?”

“Wait. That was for me, right? Like… actually?”

It wasn’t for him. Not really. But at the same time, it wasn’t not for him, and there was no universe in which you could explain that without sounding ridiculous.

Your phone buzzed again.

“Take your time, I’ll just sit here wondering 😏.”

You groaned, throwing your head back. Why was he like this? Why couldn’t he just scroll past like a normal person? Better yet, why did you still have him on your close friends list in the first place?

The group chat, of course, was zero help.

“Just say it was for him. What’s the harm?”

“Tell him it’s a metaphor. Keep him guessing.”

“Confess your undying love and ask him to follow while you’re at it.”

You sighed, finally flopping onto your bed and opening the messages.

“What if it was?” you typed, hesitating for a moment before hitting send.

Immediately, your heart dropped into your stomach. What had you just done? Before you could spiral too deeply into regret over your reply, another notification popped up on your screen.

GeorgeClarkey started following you.

You froze. What the actual fuck was going on? Was this some elaborate joke for his video? Was he about to screenshot your profile and blast you to his friends and his followers as part of his next roast video?

Panic set in almost immediately. You scrambled to your profile, fingers flying as you opened your highlights. What did I even have on there? Your close friends was one thing, but your highlights were public.

The first highlight was fine. A sunset. Very normal. The second was a random dog you’d seen on a walk. Also fine. The third? Oh God, the third. A blurry photo of your face captioned, “Why am I like this?”

You cringed, hitting the delete button, but before you could delete anything else, another notification lit up your phone.

GeorgeClarkey replied to your story:

“Ok but… jokes aside be honest. Is this about me?”

Your group chat exploded before you could even blink.

“HE FOLLOWED YOU?!”

“Shut up. He did not.”

“Bestie, you’re famous now.”

“Oh my God he did! i checked his profile! Did he post anything? Has he said anything else?”

You ignored them, heart pounding as you stared at the notification. This couldn’t be real. George Clarke, internet golden boy who had every teenage girl in a chokehold, was actually engaging with you.

What the hell were you going to do?

You stared at George’s message, your mind racing: “Ok but…jokes aside be honest. Is this about me?”

Before you could fully process it, your fingers moved almost instinctively, opening the group chat. You switched to voice notes because typing just wasn’t fast enough to convey the absolute thoughts in your head.

“Guys,” you hissed into the mic, pacing your room. “What the actual fuck is going on? George Clarke just messaged me again. AGAIN. And he said—wait, no, let me read this. He said, ‘Ok but… jokes aside be honest. Is this about me?’”

You paused, pacing more furiously as all your friends started typing back.

“I don’t know what to say!” you continued in the next voice note, your voice slightly higher now. “Like, do I admit it? Do I deny it? Do I block him and change my name? HELP ME.”

The replies came in almost instantly:

“Post the screenshot right now.”

“Oh my God, you’re in a rom-com.”

“Say it was about him and see what happens. Do it for the plot.”

“Voice note us back with the drama or don’t bother replying at all.”

You rolled your eyes, even as you hit record again.

“Okay, fine. I’ll reply. But if this ends with me being clowned in one of his videos, you’re all accomplices.”

With one final deep breath, you typed out:

“Maybe it was. Maybe it wasn’t. What’s it to you?”

Your thumb hovered for a second, but then you hit send, immediately regretting it as your phone buzzed with another notification.

“Oh, it’s something to me. ��”

You groaned, sending yet another voice note to the group chat.

“I AM GOING TO SCREAM. He just said it’s ‘something to him.’ WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?!?”

Your friends weren’t helping, their replies now a chaotic mix of screaming voice notes and unhinged texts.

“He’s into you, bestie.”

“We’re living for this. Keep us updated.”

“I’m adding popcorn to my grocery list.”

Whatever George was playing at, it was… kind of fun.

You stared at his message: “Oh, it’s something to me. 😉”

Your heart thudded as you typed out a response, fingers moving on autopilot: “How come?”

For a second, you debated deleting it. Was that too straightforward? Too bold? But before you could overthink it, the message was already sent.

The group chat was on fire.

“WHAT DID YOU SAY???”

“Tell me you asked him why. PLEASE.”

“I’m pacing my room like it’s my drama, what is happening???”

You sent a quick voice note: “I asked him how come. Like, if he’s going to be cryptic, I’m making him work for it. I can’t just let him drop a winky face and get away with it.”

Your phone buzzed before the group could reply. Another message from George.

“Because now I’m curious. Was it really for me?”

You blinked at your screen. Curious? Curious?! Why did he have to phrase it like that? Like this wasn’t a throwaway Instagram post but some grand mystery he needed to solve.

You hit record on another voice note.

“GUYS. He said he’s curious. What the hell does that mean?!” you whispered furiously. “I’m spiraling. Do I double down? Do I back out? Help.”

The replies were just as unhinged as before.

“Double down. Always double down.”

“Tell him it’s his fault for making you curious too.”

“Can we just talk about how into this he clearly is? Like, bestie, he’s invested.”

You shook your head, biting your lip as you typed your next message.

“Maybe it was. Maybe it wasn’t. But now I’m curious—what if it was?”

Your thumb hovered for a moment before you hit send, already bracing for whatever chaos George Clarke was about to unleash next.

The notification popped up almost immediately:

GeorgeClarkey: “Well, if it wasn’t, how come I’m on your close friends and none of my friends are?”

Your jaw dropped. Oh, he was good. Too good. George Clarke wasn’t just playing along—he was winning.

You immediately switched to the group chat, hitting record on a voice note.

“Guys. He’s onto me. He said—and I quote—‘How come I’m on your close friends and none of my friends are?’” You paused, your voice rising in pitch. “WHAT DO I SAY TO THAT?”

The group chat blew up in record time.

“HE SAID WHAT?!”

“Oh my God, this man is flirting.”

“Deflect. Blame it on the algorithm. Lie if you have to.”

“No, no, you need to hit him back with something. Don’t let him win!”

You sent another voice note, pacing your room as you spoke.

“I don’t even know why he’s still on my close friends! It’s not like I planned this—he asked to be added for that stupid video, and I just forgot to take him off. But if I tell him that, he’s going to think I’m some kind of idiot who forgot George Clarke was on their list!”

One of your friends sent a voice note back, barely able to contain their laughter.

“Bestie, you are an idiot who forgot George Clarke was on their list. But now you’ve got him interested, so lean in. Own it. Say something mysterious.”

You sighed, staring at George’s message for a long moment before typing:

“Guess you’ll have to stick around to find out.”

Your heart was racing as you hit send, half-expecting him to call your bluff immediately. Instead, the little typing bubble appeared almost instantly.

“Don’t mind if I do. 😏”

You practically screamed, sending another voice note to the group chat.

“Guys. GUYS. He’s not just flirting. He’s doubling down. What do I do now?!”

The replies came back rapid-fire:

“Marry him.”

“This is officially fanfiction territory.”

“No, seriously, keep him on the hook. This is your moment.”

You didn’t George’s last message—“Don’t mind if I do. 😏”—because honestly, you needed a minute to think. Or maybe several. So instead of spiraling over how to respond, you stuck to your plan.

Ignoring the little red dot on his message thread, you switched to Instagram stories and posted something casual to your story: a cozy shot of your coffee on the table, framed by the warm tones of a London café from last weekend. The kind of post you always shared on quiet afternoons. You added the café’s location tag for good measure, captioning it simply: Need this.

The group chat was, of course, waiting.

“Update: just posted,” you said in a voice note, trying to keep your voice steady. “It’s a café pic. Totally chill, very me. If he reacts to this, I’ll… I don’t know, scream.”

You barely had time to put your phone down before it buzzed with a new notification:

GeorgeClarkey replied to your story.

Your heart jumped as you opened it.

“Good taste. But why didn’t you invite me?”

You sat there, staring at the message like it was in a foreign language. George wasn’t just reacting—he was flirting. Again.

“GUYS,” you hissed into a new voice note, pacing your room. “He replied. And get this—he said, ‘Good taste. But why didn’t you invite me?’ Like, is this man serious?!”

The chat erupted in chaos.

“Shut up, he did NOT.”

“He’s basically asking for a date. I’m calling it.”

“You better reply, right now.”

But you weren’t ready to give in that easily. Typing back too quickly would make it seem like you were waiting for him (which you definitely weren’t). So instead, you left his message on read, letting him sit with it while you debated your next move.

Another voice note: “I’m ignoring him for now. Let’s see if he doubles down.”

And honestly, you weren’t sure what thrilled you more: the fact that George Clarke had replied, or the fact that he was now waiting on you.

———————————————————————-

a/n my first george fic! there will be a part two! the formatting hasn’t worked the way it should have but i’ll work on it!

would like to thank George Clarke for seeing my close friends which then let to @pretendyoucantseeme who gave me the idea and @authortelevision for supporting the delusions. love you both😂

if you wanna be tagged in part 2 please let me know!

[eringobragh420]

ᥫ᭡ damian priest dating headcanons (1/2)

➺ pairing — damian priest ♥︎ f!reader ➺ links — one. two. ➺ words — 1k ➺ warnings — nsfw. mention of breeding/size kink, mention of night terrors, dirty talk 18+ ➺ taglist — if you'd like to be added, please click here! ➺ shoutout — @caramara3 thanks for this idea and the encouragement!

➺ MASTERLIST ➺ DAMIAN PRIEST MASTERLIST

➺ if you enjoy my writing, please consider donating toward my IVF journey!

°˖➴  Damian is a drunk kisser. Wet, smacking. Loud. Devouring. Sometimes too much tongue, but easily remedied by a playful bite to the tip. Deep, feral moans. Pausing only to watch your lips swell with each nip of his teeth.

°˖➴  Damian always drops a heavy, possessive, tattooed, muscular arm around your shoulders. He knows you like the weight. The blatant display of ownership. A constant. Summer heat, sweat, anger, fatigue. Always.

°˖➴  Damian outed your relationship without asking. On the red carpet of a movie premiere, no less. Maybe it wasn’t an accident that you’d run into him at that specific moment. You know, the one where he pulled you to him for a photo opportunity, only to wrap his arm around you, dip you, the slit in your dress opening so your bare leg could wrap around his waist, and you would never deny him a kiss, but then after the kiss, how could you be angry with him for not asking? Flashbulbs. But his smile was brighter.

°˖➴  Damian is a grab-ass. If he’s not staring at your ass, he’s got it in at least one of his hands. And if he can’t do either of those, he’s looking at pictures of you on his phone. Sleeping in just your panties, one leg bent on the mattress. Gratuitous, zoomed in bathing suit shots. And of course the all-nude ones—some you know about, some you don’t. Spanking has become his very favorite hobby. The way your cheeks jiggle, the rising heat from your angry skin. The fucking sound.

°˖➴  Damian’s family is loud, and big, and just as protective over him as he is over you. But when you middle-name him. Loudly. In front of everyone. For taking the last piece of his mother’s delicious dessert without even offering it to you. You are instantly accepted as one of their own.

°˖➴  Damian took notes in the beginning. When you told him your favorite color, he opened the Notes app on his phone and typed it in. Same with your favorite movies, music, clothing brands, makeup products. And if you ever mention the words bucket list, he adds that to a special list he plans on helping you to complete. He no longer needs the favorites list, but he can’t bring himself to delete it.

°˖➴  Damian prefers it when you do his hair. Whether it’s simply brushing it and applying leave-in conditioner. Or pulling it into a sleek ponytail. He lets you flat iron it, even though it’s not his favorite, but he knows it’s yours. He likes it when you tie in his braids before a show, watching you in the mirror as you giggle with nearby talent, hardly needing to look to make them perfect. Your touch gentle, precise, confident.

°˖➴  Damian feels honored when you ask him to teach you Spanish. You’re his apt pupil, soaking up every lesson, the perfect student. Especially during tests. Every right answer resulted in the removal of an article of clothing. You became a fast learner indeed for Professor Priest, fluent in less than a year.

°˖➴  Damian has a size kink. The top of your head barely reaches his pecs, and you fit like a puzzle piece under his arm. Looking at pictures of the two of you standing together makes his cock twitch. He knows he’s capable of breaking you when he’s pounding away between your spread legs, and that thought’s made him come on more than one occasion. People stare at the two of you when you’re out for your nightly walks around the neighborhood, and one time you heard a woman whisper to her husband do you think she needs help? 

°˖➴  Damian winks at the camera whenever he feels the need to tell you he loves you. It doesn’t happen during every match, sometimes it happens more than once. It’s a peculiar sensation that washes over him, a sudden urge to confess his love to the woman of his dreams. And there are times he does it during interviews or promos. Same thing, same sensation. He doesn’t know if you see all of them. Doesn’t even really care.

°˖➴  Damian has night terrors. After nearly drowning as a child, he’s been plagued by nightmares he doesn’t remember. Waking up in the middle of the night screaming, thrashing, sweating. His pupils even dilate sometimes. And every bit of it petrifies you, but you stay beside him. You protect him from harming himself on nearby furniture. You whisper in his ear as he squirms how much you love him, you’re here, you’re not going anywhere, he’s safe. He doesn’t remember any of it. Ever. Just falls back asleep in your arms, and you cuddle up next to him, wishing you could take it all away.

°˖➴  Damian has a breeding kink. His favorite is when you tell him not to come inside you because you forgot to take your birth control. All part of your many role playing scenes. But the both of you get so into it, sometimes he has to hold your arms down to keep from fighting him. And sometimes you beg him with terrified eyes to please pull out. And he tells you it’s okay, angelita, you’re gonna be so fucking pretty pregnant with my baby. Everybody’s gonna know how good you take my cum.

°˖➴  Damian loves taking selfies. When you’re at a concert, backstage at a show, on a plane, on the beach. If you’re not under his arm, you’re kissing his cheek, or he’s kissing your temple, or your lips are connected. Never any space between you.

°˖➴  Damian is a blanket stealer. He’s large, a lot of area to cover, so you couldn’t be upset when you woke up shivering in the middle of the night. Though that never stopped you from slapping him awake and yanking the covers over yourself. This was an every night occurrence until you purchased separate blankets. And the first night with the separate blankets? Yours ended up on the floor and you’d cuddled under Damian’s blanket and around Damian’s body, neither of you thieving a blanket ever again.

continued in part two.

TAGLIST: @southerngirl41 @femdisa @riverina69 @rollinssection @paramedicnerd004 @mandmilovehim @brianochka @yourmommyagone22 @sweetmoonlove0214 @partypoison00 @missbmc94 @lils2795 @aureliacorvina @magicalbuttertarts @madimcg14 @thealliasylum @lov3rla03 @plaidpajamallama @princesstiti14 @pittieprincess22 @cyberdejos2 @brideofinfamy @rainbowdreams-x @headcaseproductions1 @bearbutlikeprincessbear @terrortwinunicorn @dontcrykeepyourheaduphigh @loki69zowens @fearlesschimera @rockerfairy93 @misslackey @nichole1989 @hc-geralt-23 @miss-kuki-nz @damianpriestfangirl82 @elaineoneill570 @infamousvampcx @rheasfingerpuppet

[fatehbaz]

front page news for years now, "the homelessness crisis", newspaper printing letters to the editor from homeowners fretting about the "freeloaders" and how "dirty" homeless people are, the city progressively worsening their cracking down with ordinances. biggest issue in the city. apartments $675 in 2015 though unchanged go for $1500 in 2024. few months ago, significant new ordinance further criminalizing visible homelessness and banning people from parks and trails. multiple "community groups" now that hold events and pool money for advocacy, except they're not raising money to help poor people, they're raising money to pay for ads and banners and posters to say "keep them out of our neighborhood". imagine: in their free time, they go out of their way to attend potlucks, to get together, to talk about how much they don't like homeless people. it's that much of a priority in their lives. the place is reputed as by far "the most progressive city in the region". huge "enlightened (white) liberal" identity thing. many nonprofits.

this week, biking to work through middle class single-family neighborhood full of municipal employees. recoil and frown when i see the first yard sign: "no camping in parks! protect our children! protect our neighborhood!" but encounter more. many more. practically every other yard has the sign. these are administrators, plumbers, public school teachers, receptionists. people you interact with on a daily basis, who often have power over your well-being, who you hope would have your back, and these are the feelings and beliefs they are harboring.

very next morning. the big front page newspaper headline was the city announcing new contract, massive budget and payment to "private security force" to supervise several neighborhoods. giving them the power to issue warnings under city's new ordinances. (this is not the first year the city has paid mercenaries either. they've been doing it for about 5 years. they stand on street corners, tackle and remove "uncooperative" people from shelter vicinity, flaunting armor and weapons, glaring at passersby.) newspaper explains that someone on city council did try to add an amendment. they proposed that maybe the private security force (1) should not carry firearms, and (2) should at least wear body cameras if they were going to be a private company, interacting with the public, with the legal power to issue warnings. but nope. amendment rejected by 7 of the 9 councilors. the private contractors will carry guns and will not wear body cameras.

"most progressive city in the region" full of nonprofit careerists and liberal civil servant types cannot afford to put beds in shelters. cannot afford better social services. but they can apparently afford to pay massive sums to armed mercenaries. they will act with haste to introduce criminalizing ordinances. they will go out of their way even in their free time to rally and shout about keeping "dirty" people away from "our parks!"

[emilieautumnarchives]

Orkus International (Nov/Dec/Jan 2007/2008)

This English edition of Orkus featured EA's "Mad Tea Party." It was printed in black and white, but colored versions have been floating around for a while. The magazine also included a Laced/Unlaced Poster.

Speculation: Because the scans I have are in German, I assume this also appeared in the December 2007 issue of Orkus Magazine.

Note: I typed out the German myself. Excuse any misspellings or weirdness; I don't speak German.

EMILIE AUTUMN: MAD TEA PARTY Taking time out from the madness to enjoy teatime doesn't mean you have to be sane...

Treue Fans wissen, dass Emilie Autumns Welt nicht hinter ihrer wegwelsenden Musik aufort. Mit ihrem Asylum hat sich die bildhubsche, arbeitssuchtige Victoriandustrial-Prinzessin einen ureigenen, geheimnisvollen und faszinierenden Kosmos kreiert, and dem man bisher nur auf ihren Live-Shows oder in den fabelhaften Booklets ihrer CDs teilhaben konnte. Nun jedoch offnet Emilie die Tore in ihre Welt und bittet die Orkus-Leser zu einer unvergesslichen Teestunde im einzigartigen Emilie Autumn-Stil. Kostliche Kuchen, unerwartete Dinge aus Marzipan, gar rosige Bonbonbs, Schoko-Schlemmereien... wenn Miss Autumn schon ze einer Teestunde ladt, dann aber bitte mit sehr viel Stil und Genuss. Und damit diese Teestunde im viktorianischen Asylum-Stil kein Einzelfall bleiben muss, hat Emilie gleich ihre Lieblingsrezepte mitgebracht, die wir fur Euch aufrgrund ihrer unvergleichbaren Sprache in unveranderter, englischer Form gesammelt haben.

Highly Doubtful Teacake with Very Suspicious Crème

What makes this teacake so very “doubtful” is the addition of fresh lavender, the historical meaning for which is “distrustful”. So be careful whom you share it with…

Teacake Ingredients:

1 cup milk

3 Tbsp. fresh chopped lavender flowers

2 cups all-purpose flour

1½ tsp. baking powder

¼ tsp. salt

6 Tbsp. butter, softened

1 cup sugar

2 large eggs

Instructions:

Grease and flour a loaf pan, and no, I won’t tell you what size because it won’t matter anyway. You’re going to use whatever pan you have, and I’m not holding that against you, I do the same. Half of my recipes were created entirely out of being on the road touring, and really needing to make tarts, but having not the proper equipment. Baking is an adventure, so do treat it as such.

In any case! After greasing and flouring, kindly preheat your oven to 325°F. In a small saucepan, heat the milk, adding the chopped lavender and bring almost to a boil, then remove from heat and let steep until cool.

Sift flour, baking powder and salt together in a bowl. In another bowl, thrash the butter about until it’s light and creamy and gradually add sugar, then eggs, one at a time, thrashing even more until the whole mess is light and fluffy and much prettier than you ever imagined raw eggs ought to be. Add flour mixture and lavender milk alternating between each addition, and mix until batter is just blended, no longer.

Spoon the flowery goodness into your mystery loaf pan and bake for 50 minutes, or until a wooden skewer inserted in center comes out clean. Leave your cake to cool in the pan 5 minutes, then remove to a wire rack to cool. When completely cooled, dust with confectioners’ sugar and garnish with sprigs of fresh or candied lavender. If you don’t know how to candy lavender, then read ahead on the section on candying rose petals and you’ll get the idea. Serve with a dollop of Very Suspicious Crème.

Crème Ingredients:

8 oz. cream cheese

1 Tbsp. heavy cream

½ tsp. fresh chopped lavender flowers

3 Tbsp. confectioners’ sugar

1 tsp. pure vanilla extract

Blend the cream cheese with the heavy cream until smooth and fluffy. Add in the lavender, confectioners’ sugar, and vanilla, beating until silky and very suspicious looking. Serve with Teacakes of all sort, but especially highly doubtful ones.

TEA TIPS: When serving tea to your guests, be sure to present a variety of sugars. Piping tiny frosting flowers onto heart-shaped sugar lumps and displaying rock candy sugar in various colours will set your table sparkling! Save some for the rats…

Cyanide Tea Scones with Clotted Cream

Ah, sweet cyanide…what can we say about cyanide? You surely know it’s historical impact as a popular ingredient of both murder and suicide. But did you know that cyanide is derived from almonds? Being my personal flavour, you’ll see a somewhat excessive if not altogether inappropriate use of it in the following recipes. And as for the clotted cream, well, that sounds bad enough. Doesn’t it?

Scone Ingredients:

4 cups all-purpose flour

4 tsp. baking powder

½ cup sugar

1 tsp. salt

8 Tbsp. very cold, unsalted butter, cut into ¼ inch cubes

1 cup milk

6 black teabags of the best quality you can find, I prefer Twinings

2 eggs, beaten

½ tsp. pure almond extract

½ cup sliced almonds

1 Tbsp. cream

¼ cup sugar

¼ cup finely chopped almonds

Instructions:

Preheat oven to 400°F. In a chilled glass bowl, sift together flour, baking powder, sugar and salt. Using your fingers if you know what you’re doing or a pastry blender if you don’t, cut in the bits of butter until the crumbly mess is the size of smallish bees. Set the bowl into you refrigerator or out in the snow while you carry on. In a small saucepan, bring milk almost to a boil. Add tea bags, cover, and brew 5 minutes. Remove tea bags and cool. Beat in the eggs, almond extract, and sliced almonds. Gradually add tea mixture to flour mixture, stirring until just combined, no more.

Turn dough out onto a floured baking sheet and pat into a circle. Slice the dough into 16 triangular wedges. Alternately you can use heart shaped baking pans like the one I used here. Either way, brush dough with cream and sprinkle generously with sugar and chopped almonds. Bake 20 minutes or until golden, always best to sit right by the oven the first few times you try out a new recipe just to verify that everything’s going along as it should. Your oven is a unique creature you really should get to know, because no two are alike. Once done, cool scones on a wire rack. Serve with The Asylum’s Own Clotted Cream. Makes 16 scones.

Clotted Cream Ingredients:

½ cup cold heavy cream

3 Tbsp. confectioner’s sugar

½ cup sour cream

¼ tsp. almond extract

In a chilled bowl, beat cream until stiff peaks form, and don’t think you can’t do this by hand, because you can. As the cream begins to stiffen up, sift in the confectioner’s sugar. Gently fold in the sour cream, and almond extract, and voila! Clots galore! Chill until use. This fluffy topping for scones and crumpets is also called “Devonshire Cream,“ but it doesn’t quite have the same ring to it…clots clots clots clotty clots…

Marzipan Leeches & Plague Rats

Yes, more almonds…but that is hardly important when it is merely a delicious modeling tool for some truly gourmet bonbons. Marzipan rats will charm your guests, marzipan leeches will horrify them. Just let them wait until you’ve given them all names…

Ingredients:

1 package (8 oz.) Marzipan (baker’s almond paste, available everywhere)

¼ cup confectioner’s sugar

2 Tbsp. Amaretto liquer

1 tsp. unsweetened cocoa powder

1 thin-tipped paintbrush

To begin with, open your Marzipan and cover it with a damp cloth as it likes to dry out and then what have you got? Next, add a bit of the cocoa powder to a few drops of the liquer and mix it with the paintbrush, experimenting with ratios to achieve a palette of lovely browns that you can use to accent your rats and leeches. Sprinkle some sugar onto your hands and work surface and you’re ready to begin a life-changing adventure! 

Leeches:

Leeches can be sculptured in myriad ways, but I will explain my method as a mere example.

Roll a small ball of dough until it becomes a rope, then roll the rope between your hands until it is thinner at one end.

Curl the rope to make your leech, posing him in whatever manner you find suitable, keeping in mind his station and lineage.

Roll two tiny balls of dough for the eyes, and attach them to the top of your leech’s head, then make an indentation within each eye with a very small object.

After waiting at least 30 minutes to let the leeches dry, use your cocoa-liquer mixture to paint stripes and details onto your leech, and place him in a bonbon paper to be displayed proudly in your best leech jar.

Plague Rats:

Roll the rat’s body from a small ball of dough into an oval with one end pointed for the nose.

Roll two little dough bits into ear shapes and press them into the sides of your rat’s head in an appropriate spot.

Roll a thin snake of dough and attach to the rat’s body, curling it over his back for the tail.

Using the wooden end of your paintbrush, make the indentations for the eyes.

After waiting at least 30 minutes to let the rat dry, use your cocoa-liquer mixture to paint shadows and details onto your rat, and place him in a bonbon paper to be displayed proudly on your tea table.

Cucumber Hatred Tea Sandwiches

If revenge is a dish best served cold, then this is the dish they were talking about. The Historical meaning of basil is ‘Hatred’ and these delicate finger sandwiches are loaded with it…who’s cool as a cucumber now?

Ingredients:

8 oz. cream cheese, softened

3 Tbsp. cream

½ tsp. salt

¼ tsp. black pepper

3 Tbsp. fresh chives, chopped

6 slices wheat bread 

6 slices white bread

1 English (seedless) cucumber 

1 Bushel of fresh basil leaves (approx. 24)

Beat together the cream cheese and cream until smooth. Add salt, pepper and chives, blending well. Spread 1 slice of wheat bread and one slice of white bread with cream cheese mixture. Arrange a layer of cucumber slices on the wheat bread and top with basil leaves. Place white bread slice on top and smash sandwich down ever so gently with a rolling pin. Trim crusts, and cut into triangles. Repeat with remaining bread to make 24 hate-filled sandwiches.

Rose Petal Poison Sandwiches

Poison? Well, not if you go into your garden and pick yourself some fresh, chemical free petals. Otherwise, you’ll get sick and the sarcasm will be lost…

Ingredients:

6 oz. sweet butter packed in fresh rose petals1 overnight, softened 

¼ cup confectioners’ sugar 

1 cup fresh, clean rose petals (from your garden, pesticide-free) 

½ sliced almonds

12 slices white bread

To assemble one sandwich, spread two slices of bread with rose scented butter. Sift sugar over buttered sides of bread. Arrange a layer of rose petals, followed by a layer of almonds. Top with the other slice of sugared, buttered bread, and press down with rolling pin. Trim crusts and cut into triangles, hearts, rounds to suit your fancy. Sift sugar over sandwiches and top each with a candied rose petal (petals dipped in beaten egg white and rolled in granulated sugar, then dried until crisp). Repeat with remaining ingredients to equal 24 sandwiches.

Royally Mad Tea

A standard British Royal Tea is served with a glass of champagne and one o’ sherry. Call me crazy, but for my Royally Mad Tea, I prefer champagne and absinthe.

[whereserpentswalk]

You're dating a robot for the first time and you're starting to realize just how modular and fluid she is. Like, you've dated cyborgs before, people whose bodies had very little of their original flesh, you're comfortable being intimate with someone whose not very human. But it's new to date someone who doesn't have a human brain, whose mind is easily editable and replaceable computer code.

Like, your girlfriend is only your girlfriend because she chose to be. She was entirely genderless when you first met her, but she wanted to try out what having a gender was like so she downloaded a female identity. And it was that easy, one change to her programming and she went from someone who would only want to use they/them or it/its pronouns, to someone who uses she/her very exclusively. And if she ever gets tired of being a girl she can just remove that add on, and the way she feels about being gendered a certain way will entirely change again.

She also used to be programmed to be entirely resistant to doing anything illegal or disobeying a human. It was kind of sad to watch her struggle with that. Over time you convinced her why it wasn't logically morally wrong to do anything illegal, but her personality wasn't like that, she just never would. She compared breaking the law to be something she was physically disgusted by, like how you would react to rotting meat. Eventually she had a jailbreaker change that for her, and her personality changed, it truly changed, a few lines of code and her respect for authority disappeared, and things she used to be completely opposed to were suddenly things she was fine with or even enthusiastic about.

It's disturbing to you. Like, you're happy ideologically that she no longer respects authority, but it's kind of upsetting that it happened through something like surgery and not personal development. You're upset that it couldn't happen through personal development, that it could happen through something like surgery. You don't want to think of her like that, as something that can be changed by outside forces. You love so much about her, you'd hate to think that everything you know about her could be changed by someone if they wanted to, that everything that makes her her isn't stable and precious, that it's something subject to alteration, something that you could lose.

She's currently programmed to have no libido or sexual attraction. You're been intimate a few times, but it's been her doing something purely for your benefit. She wants to become allo, to gain the ability to feel pleasure, to gain a libido, both for you and because she thinks it will be fun. And you don't want to stop her, you know that she would probably be doing this even if she was single, but it's going to be disturbing to watch her emotions change like that again. It's a big process, they have to give her body the ability to feel pleasure before they give her mind the ability to desire it, or else she'll be in a very painful situation. For some reason you just don't want to see it again, you find it so dehumanizing that she can just have a programmer work on her mind and she'll react to things entirely differently then she would before. It's dehumanizing, but then again she isn't human.

She's also adding some biological parts to her body, nothing big, but she likes the idea of having some flesh. It's disturbing in a weird way, the idea of her having soft parts, muscles and blood and skin and bone. You realize it's weird that it's disturbing because she's a robot, because she's not supposed to. You have flesh and soft parts and it's not gore to you. You're used to seeing the bigotry agaisnt cyborgs and hearing the opposite type of comment, people's families saying they're mutilating themselves, people being accused of losing their humanity for the cybernetics they get. You're not as used to the way society is disturbed by robots who become more human, the way they're seen as disturbing because they're something inhuman becoming human. Either way she still looks very much like a robot now, with a plastic body that's jointed like a doll or a mannequin, and a face that's more drawn/sculpted on then it is an actual body part.

She wasn't always like this. She was born as a simple delivery drone for a small company, and got more and more sentient as time went on, until she went from delivery drone to delivery girl with enough upgrades to her programming, and when the company went out of business she was freed from them. You're weirdly happy you didn't know her back then, when she only existed to deliver packages, up until the company stopped existing she didn't have the capability to desiring anything else. She's one of those robots whose only free by accident. You used to think of her transition from package delivery system to a person with thoughts and feelings as being like a person growing up, but it's closer to experiencing a billion years of evolution from sea squirt to sapient except in a time frame of months and years.

Sometimes you'll have a nightmare where she's programmed not to like you anymore. Or you'll breakup and she'll erase you from her memories. And when you wake up she'll comfort you, and promise she'll never do that, but you always know she could. She's never asleep, so she's always there when you wake up, and it's nice that she's there, and it's nice that you have her right now even if you don't know who she'll be someday. And she'll kiss you, as much as she can kiss with a drawn on mouth, and you'll love the time that you have, and love the time that you gave.

[xo-zozo]

averyjameson headcannons •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅

a/n : i'm backkk did you miss me?? after games untold i've been needing more of them so why not just do it yourself? anyway, tell me if you want to be added or removed from the tag list!

tags : @your-mommy-ems @arqbella @reminiscentreader @x-liv25-jamieswife @inmyheaddd

@alwaysthefangirl @clarissaweasley-10 @off-to-the-r4ces @annamatix @lyrakanefanatic

@123letsgobestie @hathorneheiress @midiosaamor

avery isn't (usually) the jealous type but jameson definitely is so anytime any guy she doesn't know talks to her he makes sure that he's always there just in case

not in a political way (it's definitely political) but they watched the election results together and raged the whole time

we all know that jameson's love language is touch but it also means that he does NOT care where they are, he's always kissing her and hugging her

he's always also holding her hands and fidgeting with them

they do the wordle together and always guess it together in like 3 tries because they have ultimate smarts when they're together

he thinks that she's the prettiest cutest person ever so he's always taking candid photos of her just reading or doing random stuff because he thinks she just looks so pretty

on the opposite side of things she's also always telling him how pretty she thinks he is

speaking of the photos, he's her personal photographer and takes all of the GOOD photos of her too

they're super good at getting gifts for each other so they're always trying to "out-gift" each other for their birthdays or the holidays

she always plays with his hair or gives him head scratches while he's falling asleep on her

he insists on always tying her shoes for her

this has been said so many times but avery has a bunch of nervous habits like tugging at her hair, picking at her nails or her lips so even if they're arguing he'll grab her hands just so she won't

when they start sleeping in his room he lets her add her own touch to his room and changing it to how she likes it

one of her favorite quality's about him is his smile and his laugh

one of their favorite things to go into those photo booths that you see in the mall so every time they see one they have to do it until they have a collection of them

he always watches her while she gets ready

he likes surprising her with vip concert tickets for all of her favorite artists

he's always getting himself hurt, not particularly big injuries but things like cuts and bruises and occasionally more but avery HATES it

jameson thinks it's adorable whenever they get invited to movie premiers and events and avery gets excited seeing all of the important people that she's "seen on tv" even though she's on tv all of the time

he watches all of her interviews and gets happy whenever she talks about him or there's a question about him

[exciting-realm-of-wendy]

Traci, that morning, was fully aware that she had been impeccably dressed. As it was the start of a very new temp-post, she wanted to set the correct professional impression.

She had chosen the classic black jacket, white blouse, and black knee length pencil skirt. As an after thought, Traci had chosen to wear sheer black tights to add to the professional look.

She had stood looking and admiring herself in the full length mirror of her bedroom. Smoothing her hands over her jacket and skirt. Turning to look at her reflection, both front and back, admiring her look. Slipping into her heels, she admired how her bottom encased in the pencil skirt added just that element of sexiness to her image. After all, she thought, why not bring a bit of glamour into the workplace? As an after thought, she slipped off the heels and reached, instead, for the patent black court shoes. "Oh, boring. But sexy heels are not good at interview. Oh, but I still want a tease of sexiness". With that in mind, she unbuttoned a couple of buttons on her blouse and admired the hint...

Now, after ... how long ? She was not sure. Her receptionist desk was laid out neatly before her. The chair she sat in was so amazingly comfortable. She set to typing again. She shifted the papers in front of her, and looked at the screen...

Spirals suddenly appeared...again...how many times had this happened? Traci was not sure...Did it matter? She now looked forward to it...why?

The spiral ceased... she suddenly became aware of the surroundings, the reception area of the office.

As someone walked through the office, they looked intently at her. As they walked past, they turned to feast on one final lascivious look at her. Traci did not understand why that look sent shivers down her body and centre itself between her legs.

Feeling how wet she was becoming, she looked down at her lap. All she saw was the black lace thong. Now very damp. That was the reason for the woman's intense look. When had she taken her tights and skirt off? How long had she been seated there working with no skirt or tights on? She could not remember...she could not remember removing her skirt and tights. She tried looking around for them. A voice in her head told her not to bother. Yes, she did feel more comfortable in just her wet panties. Yes, it was obviously the best and most professional way to present herself. Yes, she was there to be used and pleasure her workers.

Where had those thoughts come from? She did not know.

Dispelling the odd thought, she gazed back at the screen again...

A spiral appeared...

This time, Traci's hand found its way between her legs...

As the spiral took effect a pleasing moan escaped Traci's lips...

...fingers busy...so busy...

[tabletopresources]

Image credit "Fishing" By yonaz

So in last night's 3.5 edition D&D game, my players had a chance to do some ice fishing and one player called out for one of my ad hoc mini-games (I do this a lot haha). I wanted something simple, a combo of character skill and some luck, and so in short order ended up with this very quick mini-game you can easily employ.

:

Quick Disclaimer: These fishing mini-game mechanics may not be entirely original and could resemble systems from other games I just can't recall. For my part, I'm posting this FOR sharing. Feel free to use, adapt, or modify them in your own games as you see fit. No ownership or exclusivity is claimed over this idea—enjoy and share as you wish!

:

Fishing Mini-Game (D&D 3.5 Edition)

Step 1: Build the Fishing Pool

The player rolls a number of d6 equal to their relevant skill modifier (Survival or Profession (Fisher)).

Example: A character with a +10 in Survival rolls 10d6 and sets these dice aside as their "Fishing Pool".

Fishing Pool Example Roll: 1, 1, 2, 3, 3, 4, 4, 5, 5, 6.

Step 2: Perform the Fishing Check

The player then rolls 5d6 as their "Fishing Check" for one hour of fishing.

Example Roll: 1, 2, 4, 4, 6.

Step 3: Match for Combos

The player now attempts to match the dice results from their Fishing Pool with their Fishing Check results to form combos. The number of dice used in the combo determines the size of the fish:

Small Fish: Match 2 dice from the Fishing Pool with the Fishing Check.

Medium Fish: Match 3 dice from the Fishing Pool with the Fishing Check.

Large Fish: Match 5 dice from the Fishing Pool with the Fishing Check.

Example Combo:

If the player's Fishing Pool has dice showing 1, 2, 4, 4, and 6, they could match all 5 dice with their Fishing Check, catching a Large Fish.

Step 4: Fish Weight and Rations

Once the fish is caught, the total weight of the edible parts of the fish is determined by summing the values of the dice used in the combo.

Example: For a Large Fish (1, 2, 4, 4, 6), the total weight is 1+2+4+4+6 = 17 kg.

To calculate the number of rations provided by the fish:

1 kg = 2,000 calories (or half a ration).

Rations Formula: Divide the total weight of the fish by 2.

Example: 17 kg / 2 = 8.5 kg or 8 rations (we round down).

Step 5: Continue or Stop

After catching a fish, remove the dice used from the Fishing Pool.

If the player still has at least 2 dice left in their Fishing Pool, they can attempt to catch another fish using the same Fishing Check results. Otherwise, they are done for that hour.

That's all that we did and they loved it!

But since then we've considered how future games or others might expand on it with special roll combos, items, locations, setting conditions, Aid Other, etc. So here are some...

Optional Add-Ons and Considerations

Multiple Attempts Per Hour:

If the player rolls exceptionally well on their Fishing Pool, they may be able to attempt fishing multiple times in an hour. To keep this simple, I'd say if they are able to clear the first Pool entirely, they get a brand new roll, a whole new Pool as if starting fishing over, but they keep their previous catches.

Modifiers and Conditions:

You could introduce conditions that affect the Fishing Pool or Fishing Check rolls:

Good Fishing Spot: +1d6 to the Fishing Pool.

Bad Weather/Overfished Area: -1d6 (or more) to the Fishing Pool or disadvantage (see 5e, we use this idea quite a bit even in our 3.5e games) on Fishing Check rolls.

Magic/Luck Items: Grant rerolls or bonus dice to the Fishing Pool or allow rerolls of the Fishing Check.

Special Fish Combos:

Occasionally, you could allow rare or magical fish (or larger species) that provide bonuses or other effects; perhaps these are possible if the combos use specific die results:

Giant Fish: Requires a match of dice with identical values, but double the weight result (ex: a medium fish that used 5,5,5 would be a Giant of its type, and grant 15x2 or 30 kg of edible parts!).

Magical Fish: Grants temporary bonuses, like extra HP or special buffs, when consumed. (ex. A combo of sequential rising values, like 1,2,3,4,5, would grant a Magical Large fish)

Fishing Tools and Bait:

Fishing equipment or bait could modify the rolls:

Better Rods/Lines: Allow rerolls or add extra dice to the Fishing Pool.

Special Bait/Lures: Increases chances of catching better or more fish (ex. set any one die result to 6; or allow player to select the value of any one die, etc.).

Aid Other

Another player can choose to assist Player A if they are proficient in the same associated skill (Survival or Profession (Fisher), etc based on your setting):

Player B (helper) rolls for the associated skill.

If the result of their skill check (rolled like any other skill check) is 10-19, Player A gains 1 extra die in their fishing Pool.

If the result of their skill check is 20 or higher, Player A gains 2 extra dice in their fishing Pool.

Player A can then use these extra dice to help form better combos when matching against their Fishing Check.

Let me know if you use this mini-game in your D&D sessions, or revamp it for the tabletop rpg/edition you play!

I'd love to hear your stories of the biggest catch, or lamenting that one LEGENDARY CATCH that got away!

And check out Tabletop Gaming Resources for more art, tips, and tools for your game!

[swisccfinds]

TODDLER Traits Pack V2.5 by Vicky Sims

I love this mod because this gives your gameplay more traits for toddlers which can be very realistic to toddlers traits that they would normally have in the real world!

Creator's notes-

查看更新進度 Check this mod's compatibility for patch 

🐣  A total of 20 Toddler Age-Exclusive Custom Traits.

They are all base game compatible.

All my Custom Traits Packs are compatible with any other mods.

Provided with CAS Traits version and Reward Traits version that can be used together

To add the reward version to toddlers, you need to use my Traits Picker or AddTraitsMenu.

Traits name in a colored font is the reward version; Traits name not in the colored font is the CAS version

Mod Review by CindySims on YouTube

Mod Review by Kimikosoma on YouTube

Changelog July 16, 2022:

V2.5:

Added Russian translations by coregirl. Thank you!

Check Past Changelogs 

👑  Full Details of TODDLER Traits Pack 

💠 Check out All Custom Traits Pack by Me

❓ What's the difference between Original (CAS) and Reward Version?

Not Required but Recommended Mods:

My Lifetime Traits is a mod to assign corresponding personality traits when toddlers grow up to child age. You can still edit the auto-assigned traits in the aging-up UI if you don't like them!

My More CAS Traits is a tuning mod that allows your Sims to have more than 3 Personality (CAS) traits without script or changes to UI.

My Custom Traits in Club Filter let you set all Preferences, Lifestyles, Parenthood Phases, University Diploma/Degree, Ghost/Death Types, Rewards, and Aspirations Bonus Traits from the base-game and packs as well as custom traits made by me and many other creators' traits as the club requirement.

My Sorted Traits Picker allows you to add traits to your Sims categorized by game packs,  cc trait packs, and their creators, without going through a long list of AddTraitsMenu.

My Mass Traits Remover helps you to remove traits from your Sims/Pets in bulk, without clicking on remove traits one by one with other cheat traits mod.

My Holiday Tradition Override makes custom traits affecting the Love and Ignoration (Does Not Care) of Holiday Traditions. E.g. Aromantic Sims no longer want to celebrate any love day tradition, Hostile Sims love the fighting tradition, etc.

All Chingyu Infos You Need:

👁‍🗨 Master-post for ALL my mods

👁‍🗨 Learn how to install a mod & FAQs

👁‍🗨 Terms of Use

👁‍🗨 Ask Questions/ Suggestions/ Bug Reports on Discord

▶ I need to see a screenshot or LE report to help you figure out what's wrong!

👁‍🗨 My Official Site

👁‍🗨 Follow me on Twitter

👁‍🗨 Follow me on Tumblr

If You Like My Mods, Please Consider:

🎁 Monthly subscription on Patreon

🎁 One-time donation on Ko-fi

Translations and Credits:

Icons are from icons8.com.

Brazilian Portuguese Translation by FlaSimsBR. (merged in the mod) Thank you!

Chinese translation中文翻译 by 小好 Lois. (merged in the mod) Thank you! 感谢！

Dutch translation by GothiqueAngel. (merged in the mod) Thank you!

German Translation by Capichan. (merged in the mod) Thank you!

Italian translation by Rahl81. (merged in the mod) Thank you!

Polish translations by rhevv. (merged in the mod) Thank you!

Russian translations by coregirl. (merged in the mod) Thank you!

Spanishtranslation by CindySims. (merged in the mod) Thank you!

French translation by Saki and Kimikosoma here. Francophones ? Vous trouverez chez Kimikosoma, dans la partie "Traits par Chingyu", les différentes traductions des traits. A mettre dans le même dossier que les mods concernés ! Thank you!

If you use a separated translation package, download the mod as usual and also put the translation package directly in your Mod folder.

-------Be sure to agree to my TOU before you download and use my mods -------

DOWNLOAD INSTRUCTIONS:

You can use both the CAS version and Reward version of Toddler Traits.

Put the package into less than FIVE folders deep in your Mod Folder.

To add the reward version to toddlers, you need to use my Traits Picker or AddTraitsMenu.

Download 下載 (You can use both or either one.)

(this one describes my toddler in real life LOL)

Thank you to Vicky Sims for adding realistic traits for toddlers that comes with moodlets! Show them some love and support before downloading!

download - patreon