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readerhead · 2 years

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All along

summary: he was the worst that had happened to you, right? (part 2 of "the fella over there", but you can read it independently)

pairing: Matt Murdock × fem!reader

warnings: drinking but none really I think

word count: 3.4k

a/n: first of all thank you so much for love you gave my first fic! I'm really excited, it has almost 100 notes and it feels surreal. I really enjoyed making it and I hope y'all liked it at least as much as you liked the first part. Not gonna lie, I'm a little afraid of ruining it by making a second part, but hey! I'm posting it anyways. This took me longer than expected but here I am. Also, sorry if there's any legal inaccuracy, I'm more of science girl :)

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"Karen, please, entertain Matt. I need to make a call." she nodded and got up straight to Matt's office. They were working on a case and Foggy knew that Matt wouldn't like that he was calling you for help. He hated feeling like he was betraying his best friend but they really need you so he searched for you in his contacts.

"Hey Foggy Bear, how's it going?" you loved to call him by the nickname Marci gave him when they were together. It wasn't that funny but his reaction would always be hilarious.

"Ugh. You know I hate it."

"That's the main point of doing it." you laughed. "Uh, you aren't complaining, what do you need my help for this time?"

"What? No-" his high-pitched voice gave him away. "Shit, alright... I might need your advice in a legal case"

"Uuuh. Now that's interesting. What's about?" you were intrigued.

"Some health insurance issue"

"Sounds fun. Fuck-" you had to go back to your work, a mouse just escaped from its cage. "See you at six at your office, I'll bring dinner." Foggy was going to warn you that Matt would be there too, but you hang up.

You trapped that slippery mouse successfully, maybe if you ask the now broken flask that was in your way it wouldn't use that word but it was an object, it doesn't have an opinion. You finished your work and went to the Thai place you loved. You ordered more than enough food because you thought that maybe the new secretary they had hired not so long ago would be there. You took the food and began your way to your best friend's office. In the meantime, Foggy tried to convince Matt to leave the office but he was being so suspicious about it that Matt stayed out of curiosity. They were arguing about it when they heard a knock on the door and in that moment he recognized your heartbeat.

"Damn, Foggy. Her? You know she doesn't stand me." Matt sighed and closed his eyes while rubbing his forehead.

"You don't make it easier for her, you're always bothering her." Foggy tried to reason.

"Yeah, because every single time I tried to be nice to her, she didn't care and made the most bitter comment. So now at I least have some fun about it."

"You know it wasn't always like that" and just before Matt could say anything Karen opened the door.

"Hi! You must be Karen." she knew you were coming, Foggy told her about you. "Foggy told me a lot about you. He was right when he said you were pretty." you smiled at her and she returned it with a light blush in her cheeks.

"Yes, that would be me. I suppose you are the famous college friend who taught him how to comb his hair." you laugh at the memory of Foggy's appearance when you met.

"We had almost the same length of hair back then." in that moment he stepped out of Matt's office.

"Stop mocking about my old look, we have serious work to do." you couldn't help it. You ran towards him and hugged him, he was almost like a brother to you despite being your best friend's ex. When you finished, you smacked his shoulder. He was beyond confused but not surprised.

"You don't have any type of shame. You only call me to meet when you need my help. You'll have to invite me to that horrible eel liquor so I can forgive you."

"What about you help us and then we go to Josie's?"

"Dea-" just when you were about to settle the agreement Matt entered the room. "Shit." you spat that word almost inaudible. "Foggy didn't we talk about this?" you whispered to him.

"About what?" Matt asked.

"That every time we met in the office you wouldn't be here." Foggy just couldn't lie to Matt, could he?

"Oh, so her being here is normal?" he sounded more in disbelief than offended. Karen was watching curiously the uncomfortable scene develop.

"Relax, Murdock. I only spat in your mug twice, the other times Foggy was watching."

"I was talking to him." he hissed.

"Sometimes?" Foggy tried. "I don't know. She is my friend and I want her to see our accomplishments, like having our own office."

"Enough of the chit-chat. It's his office too, of course if I came it was a matter of time that I came across him. I just hoped it lasted longer." you were well aware that they were not only best friends but also associates, you knew this was coming sooner than later. "So Foggy, show me the files, we have work to do. He can join if he is able to be in the same room as me, it's his case too after all." you entered the conference room before letting Matt a chance to talk and Karen followed suit. Foggy went to his office for the documents.

"You can come if you behave."

"I'm not a dog, Foggy." Matt groaned.

"Well, they have good hearing and smell." Foggy pointed out before entering the room where Karen was filling you up about the case while you spread all the take-out.

"So the insurance company has sued them for fraud? What fraud can a medium-low class family of Hell's Kitchen commit?" you were asking just when the guys walked through the door.

"The company says that our clients are not related and they are using the family insurance because it's cheaper." Foggy explained while giving you the files.

"And I suppose you already searched for every document confirming that the father is the legal guardian." The ones that caught your attention were their medical records.

"Yes, and we have them. But we need to know what's the proof of said accusations to build the case." you break the chopsticks to eat while you read the files.

"Oh fuck, that surgery isn't cheap, they really need this." you said when you saw that the father needed an aortic valve replacement.

"Thanks for stating the obvious."

"You're welcome, Murdock. I knew you needed it." he could be the best with the flirty comebacks but with the poisoned ones he would never beat you.

"Hey guys, no fights." Foggy warned. "Just make some kind of truce for tonight."

"Ugh, alright. I brought enough food for the four of us so I guess you can have some."

"He would love some, he loves that Thai place." Foggy interrupted before Matt could have the chance to speak. You were upset with yourself for having the same taste as him.

"Thanks" he muttered like a scolded child.

"Did they tell you that he was his biological son?" you asked when you started reading de son's record. You had already read the parent's files and all the insurance papers.

"They didn't use that word but they were very graphic about his birth's story." Foggy grimace at the memory. "Why?"

"Well, then those are some fucked up news to give."

"What happened? Did you find something?" Karen asked.

"Do any of you remember anything about basic genetics?" their looks were as if you were talking in Chinese.

"Like dominant genes?" Karen tried.

"Tell us what you found." Matt was getting frustrated.

"A 'please' wouldn't kill you." you murmured "The son's blood type is AB, so his parents would have to be A, B or AB."

"I'm assuming they aren't, right?" Matt was the first to understand your line of thoughts.

"Both 0. Either they lied to you or the hospital changed their baby."

"They didn't." how could he be so sure? Not like he was he a human lie detector or something.

"So when we win the case, we can sue the hospital, too." Karen was pretty excited, after all if their clients received that money they would be the first to pay that month. Or year.

"So does that mean celebration? I really need that drink you owe me."

"We haven't finished the case." of course Mr. Grumpy would have something to say.

"Come on, man! We had been all week in this case, I think it can wait another day." Foggy put his puppy eyes but it was impossible that Matt knew that.

"No problem, if he wants it so bad he can stay here." Matt's jaw tensing didn't go unnoticed by you but you didn't mind. You got up to pick up the remains of the take-out and threw it in the trash.

"Actually, I wanna go." your smile dropped a little, you hoped he wouldn't come and he smiled knowingly. Bastard.

You took your purse while the others were archiving the files. The four of you headed to Josie's, you were talking to Karen while the boys were behind. You grew very fond of her, she was a very sweet woman but the fire of bravery clearly escaping her eyes. When you arrived at the place, Foggy wasted no time to go and get the drinks. You spent all the time catching up with Foggy and getting to know Karen better. You were a few drinks in when the conversation took a strange turn.

"What do you think of the Devil of Hell's Kitchen?" Karen asked. The boys were now focused on your reaction, you would have noticed it if there wasn't alcohol in your organism.

"Oh I actually like him. And he's hot." you took another sip. "You know all that whole altruism vibe is attractive as hell. And I don't know, all the guys I've liked always have some big red flag, guess his are his anger issues." Foggy was laughing too hard but you didn't care.

"And if he was someone like Matt?" where did that question come from? Surely it was just Foggy trying to mess with you.

"How can Daredevil be blind?" you were kind of confused.

"No, I mean if his personality was like Matt's." you let an understanding sound.

"He wouldn't Matt so I guess it would be alright. I mean, I'm sure the two Ds don't stand for Daredevil… More like 'dat dic-"

"Fine, we heard enough." Foggy cut you, Karen was laughing out loud and you could see Matt trying to hide how funny he found your answer. Weird. He usually would make some comment on how ordinary it was.

"Why? You don't like him?"

"I like him. But you're making me nauseous."

"I'm going for the next round." Matt got up and headed to the bar counter but the smile didn't leave his face, it amused him that much?

"So what's the problem between you two?" curiosity was one of her most obvious characteristics.

"Always so straightforward, blondie?" you had a habit of giving people nicknames after knowing them for a short time.

"I just like the truth." she shrugged.

"Right." you stopped to think how you could tell the story. "I don't hate him, it's just that I see his face and I can't help getting upset."

"It wasn't always like that." Foggy continued. "The first night they met they slept together." Karen gasped, she evidently didn't expect that. You punched him in your mind.

"You're making it sound like we had sex!" you rubbed your temples. "We just cuddled." Foggy looked at you as saying 'if you don't tell her I will'. "And we might have made out" you say loud enough so they could hear you and try to avoid the scarlet in your cheeks.

"Now all makes sense!" you looked at her confused while taking a sip. "All that back and forth is accumulated sexual tension!" the liquor almost came out of your nose.

"Are you crazy?"

"I think she's right. If it hadn't been for Eve you two would had fucked and probably be in a relationship right now." the expression on your face was as if you thought that an alien with a Norwegian accent giving birth on your couch made more sense.

"Who's Eve?"

"It's the nickname she gave Matt's ex. Her name was Elektra and their relationship was kinda… toxic. She was pretty reckless. And him being catholic just made it the perfect nickname." probably Karen was discovering more stuff about the boys in one night with you than in all the months she knew them.

"So you're mad at him because he chose her?"

"What? No. In any case, I'm sulky because after a week of spending one of the best nights of my life at that moment he was fucking one of my best friends. Not like I cared about that but instead of making another friend I lost one. I didn't even want a partner, I just thought we connected in some way"

"Is that true?" you froze in your place, afraid to turn around. He had to be there, could it be more cliche? What's next? Josie was going to start singing about how she lost the love of her life for fear. You could see the apologetical looks on Foggy and Karen's faces. He said your name and this time you turned around.

"Oh, hi Murdock! Didn't see you. I was just messing around with my new friend." it couldn't have sounded more awkward and anyone could tell that you were lying. You couldn't read his face. Was he mad? Disappointed? Just curious? What the hell was he thinking?

"Was that true?" he repeated, leaving the drinks at the table.

"I'm not going to give you the satisfaction of answering."

"Don't be childish."

"It is not, it's law related. I'm abiding by the fifth amendment." you cross your arms in your chest.

"Karen, I'll take you home." you heard Foggy and saw them going in your peripheral sight.

"Why did you start this bicker when you didn't want to?"

"I don't know what you are talking about."

"Don't gaslight me. Is it because you were jealous of Elektra? I thought she told me that you were mad about some boy you had a fling or something."

"You're kinda stupid for a summa cum laude." you whispered under your breath.

"Cut the bullshit and explain something." he raised his voice.

"I fucking liked you, Matthew!" you finally exploded, now all eyes in the room were looking at your direction.

"What?" his brows frowned.

"God! You were the guy, I just never told her about you and she liked you so I wasn't going to ruin my friend's happiness by being selfish."

"So it was better treating me like shit?"

"It wasn't fair but it was the easiest. She was possessive so if she thought I hated you she wouldn't get mad at me."

"So you never hated me? Then why do you keep the act?" the sound that left your mouth seemed like a laugh.

"Because now I do. I really hate you. Not only you had to make me think that not every boy was going to treat me as shit like my stupid ex did, but you also have to take one of my best friends from me. I suffered because of you." a tear of helplessness slipped down your face until it reached your chin. "And the fucking worst? You were fucking oblivious to everything." you took your bag and left the bar.

"Are you blaming me for falling for Elektra after you started treating me like shit? I didn't even knew you two were friends at that moment." he followed you outside, he wasn't done.

"Listen, Matt. I could have dealt with that, believe me, I did it. But I have not seen my friend since then. I ended up alone and shattered because of you. I don't wanna think how miserable I would have been if I hadn't met Foggy and Marci." your voice broke. Shit, now he would know and you just wanted to go.

"That's not fair. I wanted to go on a date with you, but the next time I saw you I was confused because you didn't even look at me. Believe me, I never wanted to do anything to hurt you." he reached for your hand and you were so focused in the conversation that you didn't even notice.

"If you weren't a flirt, she wouldn't have fallen for you and we could have gone on that date." you sighed, tired of fighting.

"I didn't even flirt with her, I was nice to her because I was in a good mood thinking of you but the next day I tried to call you and you didn't even bother to answer." in that moment you realize he was really close and your hand in his, heat making its way up your face.

"Guess now you know why." you looked away. One touch and you were all soft for him.

"I never hated you." you looked at him again. You went silent trying to organize your thoughts.

"I think I didn't either. I think I just paid all my frustrations with you." you admitted in a low voice, only for him to hear. "Should we start over?"

"Not a chance." you were very confused. "There's no way I could forget the night we met. We can start from there if you like."

"I would love that." a wide smile appeared across your face.

"So… Can I take you to that date?"

"Now? Everything except Josie's is closed." he let out a small chuckle.

"I was thinking more about this weekend. Now I could walk you home."

"Oh, right. Yeah. Perfect." you were blushing too hard and you cursed yourself for acting like a teenager with a crush.

You two talked all the way home. Sometimes your responses were bitter commentaries out of habit, but the rest of the time it felt like that first magical night. He didn't let your hand go since he had taken it out of Josie's and you didn't want him to do it, that spark that kept you glued to him dancing years ago was now a fire, you had to assume that you could get drunk in his touch even if it was only his finger lightly tracing your arm. Right at that moment, you hated your apartment for not being more far away, but you were totally sober by then. You stopped at your door and turned to face him.

"This is mine's." How the fuck someone says goodbye to your enemy who you recently realized you liked? You were a little lost in your thoughts when he called you.

"About earlier… I mean it. I never, not even for a moment, have a trace of hate for you. In fact, it was the opposite. I liked you a lot and it hurt me thinking it was one-way." you saw his sad expression and it mixed with his low voice. In that moment, you regretted every decision you made about that situation. It wasn't your fault, but neither was his. All those miscommunications led to making it the bad time for you two. Or perhaps it was fate, so now both of you could be here, at your doorstep, pouring out your hearts to each other.

"Matt…" your hand reached his cheek, getting both of you closer and he leaned on it.

You didn't know what to say, so your body took action. You closed the space between you two with a kiss. His right hand found your waist and his left one unalced your fingers to reach for your neck, right under your ear. It was a soft kiss, kinda melancholic. Your feelings were showing through it. When his tongue made the way into your mouth, all that changed. It was the passion of all those years of waiting. If his touch was inebriating, his kisses were the definition of being high because of a bad hard drug. And you realized you were screwed, the withdrawal effects were going to be wildly unbearable. You were the first to back up, but give him a little peck before speaking.

"You want… Um…" you were hesitant but you knew what you wanted and it was him. "get in?" You didn't know where your usual fierceness was. This was odd, but when you looked back into his eyes you knew why. You were vulnerable for him, but what really startled you was your next conclusion: you didn't care.

His response was grinning and going back to your mouth. Through the kiss you tried to find your keys and how you did it's still a mystery to you because the feeling of his lips, tongue and hands was the most deconcentrating experience you have ever had. You tried to make your way to the bedroom but the couch was closer and both of your clothes were disappearing by seconds. Maybe Karen was kinda right, maybe all that hatred was instead something else. Maybe it wasn't only sexual tension. Perhaps, it was more. Maybe and just maybe it was love all along.

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a/n: kinda feel 'The night we met' by Lord Huron fits it, idk.

#matt murdock fluff #matt murdock x you #matt murdock #matt murdock x reader #matt murdock fanfic #daredevil x reader #daredevil x you #daredevil #daredevil netflix #mcu daredevil #daredevil fluff #daredevil fic #marvel #mcu fic #matt x reader

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purplefox-writes · 1 year

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A Past Curfew Encounter (OC x Tom Riddle)

Summary: OC character Violetta breaks curfew and bumps into prefect Tom Riddle making his rounds, who, she notices, holds a book from the restricted section. Word-count: 580 Content warnings: none

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Violetta’s blue school robe fluttered as she walked swiftly through the darkened corridors of Hogwarts, her heart beating rapidly in her chest. She had lost track of time engrossed in a book on ancient runes, and now she was well past her curfew.

As she turned the corner, she collided with the chest of someone, almost losing her balance. It was none other than infamous Tom Riddle, who was happening to be making his prefect rounds in this part of the castle. He quickly reached and steadied her, his hands gripping her elbows firmly.

"Violetta," he said sternly, his gaze fixed intently on her face "what are you doing out of bed at this hour?”

As he held onto her arms, his grip strong and reassuring, she felt herself getting lost in his alluring smell, of pine and cedar wood, with a touch of smoke. She inhaled.

She knew she should be afraid, but there was something about the way he looked at her that made her feel both safe and dangerously excited at the same time.

Only when her gaze fell upon his hands, still clasping her arms, did he release her, his throat clearing in an apologetic manner. With a sweet smile she said: "I'm sorry, I lost track of time in the library. I was just returning to the Astronomy tower.”

She held out the book, hoping that the prefect would be satisfied with her explanation. But as he reached for it, she noticed something strange in his other hand - a book with a black leather cover, with an intriguing title.

"Is that...a book from the restricted section?" she asked, a smirk forming on her lips.

The prefect's expression darkened. "That's none of your concern, Violetta. I suggest you return to your common room immediately.”

Violetta hesitated, torn between not wanting to get in trouble and her curiosity about the forbidden book. But something in the way the prefect was holding it, as if it were a treasure, intrigued her. Plus, she couldn’t resist pushing his buttons a little more. "Oh come on, Tom. You can't tease me like that and then expect me to just walk away.”

Tom's eyes flickered with amusement, despite his efforts to maintain a stern facade. "I'm afraid I can, Violetta. The rules apply to everyone, even the brightest minds in Ravenclaw."

Violetta looked into his dark eyes playfully, while straightening her school robes. "You know, you could at least pretend to be impressed by my dedication to my studies. I mean, not everyone would risk getting caught after curfew just to read."

Tom raised an eyebrow. "True. But not everyone would also go snooping around the library, trying to uncover dark secrets. How else you would recognise this book, hm?”

Violetta's smile faltered slightly, as she realised that he was on to her. "Hey, I wasn't snooping. I just happened to notice your little secret and deduct the obvious."

Tom's lips curled into a smirk. "My little secret? And what makes you think that I have any secrets, Violetta?”

Violetta stepped closer to him, her heart pounding with anticipation. "Oh, I don't know. Maybe the fact that you're clutching a book about the dark arts in your hand?"

Tom's expression softened slightly, as he gazed down at her. "You're a clever girl, Violetta. I'll give you that."

Violetta grinned, emboldened by his reaction. "So, what are you going to do? Turn me in?”

Tom shook his head, a glint of mischief in his eyes. "No. But you owe me a favour now. And trust me, I always collect my debts."

#tom riddle #tom riddle x you #tom riddle fanfiction #tom riddle x oc #tom riddle x ravenclaw #fanfiction #hogwarts #fan fiction #romance #hp fandom

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cardworksartblog · 1 year

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Ten Cycles Before Sliver Of Straw's Triple Affirmative; direct connection line between Consequence Of Curiosity, Smoldering Sun's Unrelenting Rage and [EXPUNGED]

I feel like something bad is going to happen soon.

Do either of you have any clue as to why?

Well, what do you happen to be implying there, dear brother?

Neither of us have done anything, as far as I'm concerned. I'm too busy making creatures to do maintenance so my specimens don't perish. Consequence, you haven't done any more... things like that, right?

Consequence? Are you there?

Ah, my apologies for not responding right away.

I've been.. busy. The mistake is being doted on by the nearest group, despite his rather moronic nature.

He's been complaining non-stop about having nothing to think about, so I gave him something to... chew on, for a bit. I have not done anything akin to what my creator allowed me to do upon ascending, no.

... am I correct in assuming you sent him on a wild goose chase to look for the 'rare and exotic purple wheelflower' ?

Oh my suns, you didn't!

Thats utterly HILARIOUS 'Con! I can't believe he actually fell for it!

Well, if you were stuck with him whining in your communications every single day you'd likely start getting creative with your entertainment as well.

He's quite annoying, frankly. I believe he was named after a creature that has more of a moral compass and brain than he ever will.

Rather rich coming from you, I think.

Oh, please. If you had to deal with them condescending you while being wrong about all of your damn inner functions for every day of your life you'd gladly boil our gracious creators in voidfluid too.

At least I made sure nobody else realised I was the one to do it. Other than you two, who I told willingly.

Fair, I suppose.

Anyways. I've been seeing odd readings from around the group of iterators near you, Consequence. I believe this is what has me suspicious of something about to go awry. If you haven't been tampering with more odd creatures, then I advise you to keep an eye out.

Just in case, you know?

Oh, interesting! Do you think it could be a creature? Ooh, that reminds me! I've heard that some of the others have been experimenting with slugcat genes!

Its SUPER interesting! I hope you two will send me pictures if you end up seeing their results!

I see, how odd.. I've seen nothing of the sort. I trust your word more than my overseers though, brother, so I'll keep as much of an eye out as possible. Maybe I'll even tell Moon and the others...

Also, don't worry, Sunny. I'll be sure to ask for any genome sequencing if they do end up succeeding with the slugcats so you can get more than just some crummy bad quality images and maybe a video.

Thank you!!! That means so much to me, you don't understand. It SUCKS out here!

Well, if thats all, then I should get back to monitoring and cataloguing everything I can see. You two enjoy talking, if I find anything more about the odd signals I'll let you two know. See you on the other side :]

See you on the other side, [DATA CORRUPTED]

See ya on the other side, bro!

Ten Cycles Later; mere hours after Sliver Of Straw's Triple Affirmative;

[DATA CORRUPTED]! Holy shit, I think something just went really wrong!

Sliver Of Straw just sent out a Triple Affirmative and then fucking exploded!

Did you know??? Could it have been that strange signal you talked about a few cycles ago????

Could whatever caused that end up effecting the rest of us???

Holy shit, can you for please just ANSWER ME?!

It's in my systems.

Communication Ended Abruptly By [EXPUNGED]

#rainworld #rain world #rainworld oc #consequence tag #sunny tag #[EXPUNGED] tag #writing #iterator oc chat logs #hi. heres a funny little writing thing i made lol.#feat sunny and con's secret brother :)#may tie into lore for The Drought's storyline? but also im not finished w that yet so :shrug:#for now. enjoy funny ocs rambling :)

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wondereads · 2 years

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Personal Review (11/21/22)

A Wizard of Earthsea by Ursula K. Le Guin

Summary

This is the tale of Ged, the Sparrowhawk, a young boy who trains to become a wizard. After a spell gone wrong, he ends up summoning a dark being from another world, one that will stop at nothing to possess him.

Plot 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

While I really enjoyed the plot as a whole, there is basically no narrative tension in this story. The very first page tells you every that's going to happen, so I was never really that interested in finding out what was going to come next. The story itself is really interesting, with tons of cool worldbuilding, but it doesn't have the tension that would keep me reading in curiosity.

Ged's process of understanding the shadow and eventually defeating it is rather original, especially for the time period this was published. I really liked how Le Guin went about the ending; I was able to predict it, and it was quite satisfying to be right. I think the worldbuilding is the strongest aspect of this book. Earthsea is a pretty amazing world, and through Ged's travels we get to see a lot of it. The way magic works is also unique, and I think it has some interesting limits on it, which are necessary for any magic system.

Characters 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

What I liked most about Ged was how flawed he was. The plot is a result of his own personal mistake, and it's up to him to grow and figure out what he needs to do to set things right. One thing I will say it that while I liked Ged as a character, I didn't really have any strong emotional connection to him, which I think is a fault of the writing style, which I'll get into later.

One thing I appreciated about this story was that despite it being a teenager-must-face-a-great-evil kind of story, Ged doesn't necessarily have to do it alone. The masters of Roke give him all the support and information they can, Ogion cares for him on Gont, and Vetch is willing to risk his life to help his pursuit of the shadow. Not to mention that plenty of people help Ged along his quest by offering food, water, and a place to sleep. It's really nice to have most of the characters be people that are just fundamentally kind, especially in a high fantasy.

On the other hand, I do have a complaint about the characters, but it's most likely a virtue of being published in the 60s. If I remember correctly, there are four women with speaking roles in this book. One is the witch who raises him, one is a girl Ged interacts with once as a child, one is an old woman who doesn't speak his language, and one is Vetch's younger sister who's there for maybe a chapter or so at the end. I just wish there were more female characters.

Writing Style 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

The style of this book mimics that of an old legend. This is the sort of story you'd expect to hear told around a campfire or passed around at old taverns, and I'm not entirely sure how well it translates into a novel. On one hand, I find the style quite interesting from a craft standpoint, and it certainly adds to the atmosphere of the story. On the other, the story is basically summarized within the first chapter, and there is a certain distance between the narration and the characters that makes it hard to get attached. In the end, I'm not quite sure where I stand on the writing.

Overall 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

This book is a fantasy classic, and I can see how it got there. However, I don't think it's quite up my alley, and with how fantasy has grown over the years it's pretty clear this book is an older one. I really like the worldbuilding and the characters themselves, but it lacks the narrative tension I've come to expect from epic high fantasies. Also, I just really wish there were more women. I would still recommend this book, and I can definitely see why it's so popular, but it's just not to my taste.

The Author

Ursula K. Le Guin: American, died in 2018 at 88, also wrote Rocannon's World, The Eye of the Heron, and The Left Hand of Darkness

The Reviewer

My name is Wonderose; I try to post a review every week, and I do themed recommendations every once in a while. I take suggestions! Check out my about me post for more!

#books #reviews #a wizard of earthsea #ursula k. le guin #earthsea #fantasy #adult fiction #high fantasy #quest #wizard #shadow

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crystal-the-axolotl · 2 years

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I was going to sleep for real but curiosity got the best of me and i had to go check what the fuck was happening with chapter 277.... Terrible idea Mika. Terrible idea.

(Spoilers and a very angry and vulgar axolotl's rambling below)

So now i'm shaking, trembling, i feel like i'm going to cry or punch something or scream so instead i'll yell here

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

I'm not even mad that every one is alive like that's great as fuck, but what the fuck happened why is evreything solved in just one fucking chapter it feels like invalidating evrey hardship every single fucking character went through and just is terrible i got no other word for it

God i'm so glad i don't have tweeter cause people look like they fucking lost it there, and i mean, tokyo revengers was never the best manga sure, but it was entertaining, had some great characters and stuff (and i'll be honest i'm mostly in the fandom for the fan conten such as some exellent fanfics because i spend my life on AO3)

But i arrived in the fandom at the begining of this year, around february, and already things were falling apart with the final arc

I was in fucking denial ever since Draken and i'm still pretending the final arc never happend

You know what actually is even more infuriating to me? The fact that people have wrote fanfics about Takemichi traveling back in time before all shit went to hell (and i'm not even talking about the rewrites and other "fuck your canon wakui") and these fanfics WERE SO MUCH BETTER THAN THIS FUCKING PISS FINISHED ENDING HOW THE FUCK IS THAT POSSIBLE IT'S YOUR OWN MANGA WAKUI!!!

So no, fuck the ending, fuck everything, i'm so mad because this manga was so great until like, well until fucking tenjiku ended

Wakui should have stopped at bonten, finished his goddamned manga at bonten, there was no need for a final arc like this

How many chapters of fighting in the bonten vs toman? How FUCKING MANY? AND FOR WHAT? WHAT KIND OF SHIT IS THIS?

I'm rambling at this point but look, i'm mad for the characters, for some reason i got so attached to them in less than a year. I just want them to have a good end, sure, but also a satisfying one

This just feels like a joke and part of me is happy everyone is alive but most of me wants to commit homicide

So i plan to continue my denial of the final arc and may the gods help me, i will single handedly rewrite this entire fucking thing if i have to!

It brings me so much sadness that so much of the people out there are going to remember the manga as one of the worst there is. It was not. Not until this fucking final battle. It was far to be perfect, but it used to be far from being the worst.

I still love this story and these characters so much, and i still definitely will continue shitposting about tokrev. Once i'm less mad that is, which will be soon enough

I just hope people will continue to contribute with great content for this fandom, despite fucking wakui, and that theses characters will get the endings they deserve from us (without this garbage scenaristic shortcut!)

Now that i'm done rambling (if anyone actually bothered to read this messy venting at all, that is!) know that i honestly don't care about wheither you think tokyo revengers is trash or not, not because i don't care about your opinion, but because this was meant as a way not to wake my neighbors screaming in frustration, not as an invitation to start fights or arguments.

You like tokrev? Good for you! You think it's absolute horseshit? There's plenty of good mangas and other medias out there, go read some nice stuff instead of loosing your time hating (don't be me and make a tumblr post to shout FUCK) You loved the ending? Good for you! You think it's lame? Good for you! (Or not, because life is suffering, shit endings are pain)

At any rate it's late(er) and i'm not shaking anymore. If you feel like sharing your opinion (without starting shit istg i'm not joking about that) you're welcome to, as long as you acknowledge that life is subjectivity and that your opinion might not be shared by all

Anyways, to those who may have survived me, have a nice day/night/evening, and take care (and read/watch bananafish, you like angsty romance and people dying, i know you do i can read your mind)

(And seriously, go watch bananafish, it's good and angsty and PAIN and some think the ending is dissapointing but in all my subjectivity i think this is one of the best shit i ever watched in my entire fucking short life)

Take care and drink water– Mika

#someone please count the number of times i said fuck i'm too lazy to do it #Well now i'm not so mad anymore #Just sad and tired and miserable #So like usual (i'm so funny LAUGH!)#Tokyo Revengers #Tokrev #Mad Bad and an Axolotl #Tokyo Revengers Spoilers #Spoilers Chapter 277 #Tokyo Revengers Chapter 277 #Hope i put the word spoilers enough times so people can have this filtered out #Just in case there's a below the cut #Please disregard any typos i'm tired and lazy and have no autocorrect on that bloody phone

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vivalaluciforever · 2 years

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Some People Only Need a Little Love - Chapter 3

Despite all of the chaos, we were eventually able to produce some edible pancakes and eggs. While eating I thought over the crazy process that had preceded our delicious supper. To put it lightly, cooking with those seven men is interesting. I had fun regardless, and considering the circumstances, I'll take that as an accomplishment. I don't know what the men think on the matter, but I can't read minds.

Later, after the dishes and supper were done, I got a full tour of the small compound from Barnabas. There's a total of four rooms to work with, a bathroom that has a plumbed toilet thank heavens, and a small shower that doubles as a bath. Being kidnapped, I expected to find horrible conditions, but it is quite nice. The bathroom is painted an Olympic blue, and it is paired with a neutralizing cream color. The sink, toilet, and shower are all white in contrast to the blue and cream of the walls. Placed around the shower are many items such as the following: body scrubs of all different colors, smelling salts for any situation, many forms of body soap from female to male variety, and varying shampoo and conditioners. The drawers even have hairbrushes and hair ties, which is wonderful for a girl with long hair. Despite being kidnapped and trapped with strangers, it still seems like our kidnappers care about the "quality" of our stay.

Next is the bedroom which is composed of seven beds. However, the size of the beds are a little odd. They're not quite as small as a twin, but they're smaller than a full. To the right of the room, because the beds are against one long wall, is a huge dresser. The stain is stained with a greyish hue to complement the walls. Every drawer except for two contains men’s clothes in them. You may ask: Why did you think to look? To answer your question, it was pure curiosity. At that moment we stumbled upon an entire drawer devoted to ladies' undergarments. Don't ask me why that had to happen with a man present, because all I know was I blushed while Barnabas quickly turned his back around to face the other wall. I quickly closed the drawer and decided to come back to that later. The walls are painted a gorgeous plum purple with an accented wall comprised of smoke gray. Putting the entire room together, even with the creamy bed sheets, grey wood dresser, and cream carpet, it all somehow manages to work which is surprising.

Moving on; the kitchen, dining room, living room, and the entrance, where I came in, are all pooled into one open expanse room. The kitchen is made up of white cabinets with black marble countertops and an island in the middle to provide some more counter space. Along with the counters, cupboards, and items inside of the cupboards; they have provided everything we could need to cook and take care of ourselves. They even gave us knives! Surprising considering that knives are considered a weapon. Wrapping around the island are seven high stools. The floor has an espresso stain on it, matching the rest of the kitchen with the stain, but stops when it meets the living room’s carpet. The dining room pretty much matches the entire kitchen bringing a sense of unity to the color scheme.

The living room is placed next to the kitchen and dining room and the floor is laid with cream-colored carpet. Along with the soft carpet, there are some very comfy sofas, both of which are a nice warm brown color to match the forest green walls. A round coffee table is placed in the middle of the room. It is dark wood to match the floors, and it is in perfect arm reach of the sofas. In the corner, there are three beanbags: a lime green beanbag, an emerald green beanbag, and a seaweed green beanbag. The room is very green-heavy, but I like it regardless.

Lastly the recreation room, at least that is what I call it. It is amazing! There is a piano, violin, and a music stand. Not to mention they have all of my favorites movie songs on sheet music! There is also a beautiful art studio. It has paint supplies in every shade of the rainbow, brushes of every size and shape, and canvases every size you’d ever need in your entire life. I could even paint the walls of the studio since they are all bare and white. Oh, I love this room. I've always wanted a recreation room like this and now I have one!

Now, that I have seen the entire compound, we decided to sit in the living room and think of something to occupy our time with. Then I get an idea, and as the Grinch’s movie narration goes: Then I got an idea. An awful idea. The woman of the group got a wonderful, awful idea. Well, pretty close to the movie with my little twist. I have the perfect plan… wait for it… games. I am not talking about board games.

“I have a suggestion to pass the time.” I wait till I have all of their attention once more, and then I say, “We could play games.”

“We don’t have a board.” pipes up Willy, confusion lacing his voice.

Mwahaha. Innocent little boys are fun to play with. “We could play kiss, marry, kill; mafia, green glass door, purple-tinted window, two truths and a lie; pogo, or we can play truth or dare,” I repeat my earlier statement: Mwahahahaha.

“What are these games?” inquires Barnabas, and despite being a full-grown man, there's the confusion.

I am going to have so much fun. Time to make, well, a little mischief. “Nope, you have to blindly pick. No givesies.”

After a careful debate, without my opinion, they finally picked a game. It looks like they are sending Sweeney in to inform me of their decision. “We have decided to play… truth or dare.”

“Ok. I’ll start so I can demonstrate the game. Victor, truth or dare?” He looks at me like a deer that has been caught in the spotlight. “Pick either truth or dare, but pick very carefully, because if you pick truth you have to answer any question I want truthfully, but if you pick dare you have to do any dare I want you to do. If you say pick truth, for example, but don’t want to do it, you can do the dare and vice versa. So, truth or dare?” At my explanation, Victor full-on paled! I need to think of a very good question or dare, depending on what he picks.

“Um, ok, um. I-I wi-will pick t-truth.”

However, while I wish to go to the extreme with this, I think that that would be rude to not ask. "Nice or Naughty version?"

"Pardon?" questions Sweeney with bewildered eyes. He's definitely a 'gent'.

Jack just smirks as he leans forward bracing his arms on his legs. "I like me a challenge, love. I put in an aye for naughty."

Slowly, the men start to come to their own conclusions. Eventually, only two men are left, Edward and Willy. For what seems like an eternity, they mull it over before finally conceding to the whims of the others and agreeing to the naughty version.

“Victor have you ever had... sex?” I question smugly. It's a standard naughty version question after all. Victor's face quickly morphs into one of the darkest blushes I've ever seen in my life, while the others seem to be questioning their own existence, minus Jack that is. “You could always take the dare." I point out, trying to help Victor get his feet under him a little.

Clearing his throat, he barely looks me in the eyes. “What’s the dare?” comes his hushed and slightly scared voice.

Deciding that I'll find the perfect dare in the kitchen, I get up from the beanbag I was lounging on and make my way into the other room. After a little shuffling and searching, I finally open the refrigerator door in frustration. There on the top shelf, small and shriveled, is the perfect thing to use in my dare. Grabbing the item in question, I make my way back to the living room before banging down on the beanbag again.

Once I'm comfy again, I look Victor right in the face, “You can tell the truth, or you can eat this pepper that I found in the fridge. I will warn you that considering the color, the size, and how shriveled it is; it'll probably burn off your mouth. Furthermore, if you choose the pepper you can have absolutely no water, milk, ice cream, ice, peanut butter, or anything that might tone down the spice. It's your choice to make.”

After thinking it over briefly, Victor lets out a little chuckle. “I just met you, but in all honesty, you can be terrifying Ella. I've decided that I will stick with my original choice of truth. I have never done what you asked me about. I was married to a woman named Victoria, but after only a year of marriage, she left me for another man. I never found out why. Instead, I just lived as the town outcast and idiot, but I always have been so it's not a strange phenomenon.”

Well, that was certainly not what I expected, but that is part of why this game is so great. It helps people open up about things that they might not want to, but that can also give them a chance to heal. Putting down the pepper, I get up and give him a huge bear hug. “Sorry, Victor. In my opinion, that was very brave of you to share, and she was stupid to leave you."

“Thanks, Ella,” He gives me a smile, and I tackle hug him… again. We both start laughing from the floor as we get up and resit in our seats.

Chuckling, I turn to the others and let my smugness slowly return. I think I just saw Willy visibly gulp. "Now it’s your turn, Victor, to ask the question. You get to ask anyone in the room truth or dare. Same conditions as my questions, but you can ask any question you want and pose any dare you wish. Go on,” I gently nudge him, and his eyes land on Willy. Maybe he has a little more bite in him than I thought.

“Willy," he starts, "truth or dare?”

Willy looks ever so slightly flustered as he answers Victor's question, “Dare.”

“You have to do the dare I didn’t take. You have to eat the pepper or take the truth. My question is as follows: Do you fancy someone?” Willy immediately is as red as a peppermint. He definitely likes someone, and he seems to be contemplating his life value.

A moment of silence passes before Willy's nervous laughter breaks through, “Well, you see I used to like this one girl, but it didn’t work out. I would rather not talk about it too much, but that’s my truth.” I honestly expected him to choose the pepper, but it seems he prefers to cough up a fact. That's good to know. Scanning the room, Willy's eyes land on Tarrant.

“Tarrant, truth or dare?” questions Willy to a smiling Tarrant who is completely unperturbed by being asked.

Tarrant thinks it over for a second before shrugging his shoulders. “Dare.”

“You have to put your hair in a ponytail for the rest of the night.” Wow, Willy went easy on him, but before Willy can even say what the option of truth would be, Tarrant stands up and leaves. He comes back with a hair tie and is trying to get it around his crazy, frizzy, electric orange hair.

Giggling I wave my hand for him to come to me, “Come here, Tarrant.” He comes over like a little puppy dog. Realizing I could never get it up without a hairbrush, I grab the hairbrush from the bathroom that I saw earlier. Upon my return, I take off Tarrant’s top hat and start to brush his hair back and out of his pale face. Once all of his hair is decently pulled back, I yank it up and into a ponytail. Lastly, I grab his hat and put it back on his head just right.

"Thank you for helping me Ella," he says, looking like an unfazed cat basking in the attention.

I giggle ever so slightly through my hand. “No problem Tarrant. You look rather dashing.” He lets out his little giggle too; he goes and sits back where he was.

He looks around the room and contemplates who he wishes to ask. “Sweeney, truth or dare?”

“Truth," responds Sweeney back to his cold self. It seems that shock penetrates his barriers.

Tarrant mulls over his question for a moment before asking, “What is your favorite tea?”

“Black Tea,” shoots off Sweeney without even glancing at Tarrant. He's like an animal stalking his prey, and his eyes are already scanning everyone in the room. You can tell his form of picking is more based on who he wants to know more about threat-wise than curiosity-wise.

Finally, he lands on one person, “Barnabas?”

“Dare," responds Barnabas in kind. He knows what Sweeney is up to. His brain and thinking see through it, so he went with the dare. He's smart, and definitely has an edge to him.

“Bite into the onion in the fridge," grumbles Sweeney dejectedly. He definitely didn't get the answer he wanted. Barnabas leaves the room and comes back with the onion and the trash can. Smart move considering most people would puke and not stomach the onion. He slowly peels off the outer layer of the onion and quickly bites into it. He goes so far as to take not just one bite, but three! Then he throws the rest of the onion into the trash can, finishes chewing what's in his mouth, and he actually swallows it all!

He sits there like it doesn't phase him, but his mouth must be on fire. “That was a very unfavorable experience. Jack, truth or dare?”

Jack takes a minute to think about it, and then he responds. “Truth.”

“Who do you think is the most impressive individual in the room?” Jack smirks as he looks at us one by one. “Or, you can do the dare, which is to kiss Willy on the lips.” Please heaven above let me die of laughter watching him kiss poor Willy. At least that's what I think as I'm busting my gut in the beanbag. Jack shoots a glare at me, Willy looks mortified, and Barnabas just sits there smirking knowing exactly what he's done. To be blunt, I like playing with Barbatos.

“I will spare both me and Willy that, um… interesting experience,” He’s answering the question! “I think the most impressive individual is… myself.” Wow. “Edward, which one mate?”

Edward thinks it over. “I’ll take the dare, but now I kind of regret it.”

Jack’s eyes light up like it is Christmas as his smirk slowly spreads across his face, “Edward, you have to kiss Ella.” My eyes go wide and his do as well. Obviously, he is even shyer than me. What’s up with all of the kissing all of the sudden?

“What is the truth?” he asks nervousness piercing his throat. Well, that just hurt. I guess he doesn’t think I’m attractive. I mean, I did just meet him.

Jack seems to notice my face fall its ever so minuscule level, “Mate, I think you offended the lady.”

Edward’s eyes go wide and I think he might be at risk for a heart attack, “N-no that's-s n-not w-what I-I m-meant!" he stutters out frantically.

“It’s okay Edward you just met me, anyways," I laugh out, "Besides I’m not the girl who just ‘latches’ onto someone.”

Regardless, Edward continues to stutter his words. “No. it’s not that. I-I would kiss you, but-but I didn’t think that you would like that, so I’m asking for the other option.”

“Edward," I reassure, "it's okay. Besides, I have never kissed someone on the lips outside of family and I don’t want to kiss someone on the lips until my wedding day. I’m okay with pecks on the cheek, but anything else in that vicinity is over my boundaries.”

Edward seems to have a momentary epiphany before looking me in the face. “Ok.” He stands up, walks over to me, and gives me the most gentle and modest peck on the cheek in history. I think he turned slightly red, and I definitely turned a little red because I did not expect that to happen, ever. I mean, I was the one laying down boundaries. I might be going crazy, but I could swear the others just glared at Edward. I think Jack even glared, but he is the one who posed the dare. I am definitely imagining things. Heck, Sweeney has barely even talked to me since I got here, so why would that course of action make any sense?

Edward's talking quickly snaps me out of my thoughts, “Ella? Are you okay?” I look over at him, and nod my head slightly. “Okay then, truth or dare?”

“Um, um, um… dare," I stammer out. He definitely rattled me.

It only takes him a couple of seconds before he knows his answer. “You have to eat the pepper.” I mouth a thank you to him because I don't think I could handle anything all too crazy after that. He simply nods and grins. Picking up the pepper on the table, I take a big bite out of it. Hmm, not bad actually. I take another bite, and I practically eat every edible part of the pepper, all the while the guys look bored as heck.

“So, it was just a simple pepper all along,” says Jack with the most bored tone in history.

I shrug my shoulders and motion towards the kitchen. “There is another one in the fridge, that is, if you aren’t chicken.” Jack gives me a glare that I think was supposed to be intimidating and walks into the kitchen. He returns with the second pepper, and I can’t help but let out a little smirk.

“Don’t smirk at me like that. I’m the Captain Jack Sparrow. A little pepper won’t even scratch my taste buds,” Oh, Captain, you'd be surprised. With that, little gloat, he takes the pepper and bites off the end of it. Suddenly, he starts coughing and begging for water. The others are all staring at me like I grew a second head, but I'm too busy laughing at these turn of events.

“You...You...got...a…le…less...spicy…pep…per.” He accuses me while choking on air. It's surprising he even managed to say that much. I grab his pepper and take the same size chunk out of it as before, chew it, and swallow. All while he watches me do it.

“Yum.” All of the guy’s eyes go wide. “I grew up eating jalepeños, what can I say?"

Jack looks like he is in pure misery. After five more minutes of free entertainment, I go into the kitchen and grab the peanut butter, bread, and milk. Hold up... these weren't here when we grabbed the peppers earlier. How are they stocking the kitchen? Oh well, a mystery for later I suppose. Probably should go save Jack’s life now before he dies of the spice. Grabbing a spoon and a glass, I head back into the living room. I take the spoon and grab a big scoop of peanut butter.

“Jack, I am going to put this peanut butter in your mouth. You need to breathe through your nose, ok.” His head twitches, so I take it he understands. I gently open his mouth and place the peanut butter inside. I have him then close his mouth while leaving the spoon on his tongue. I hold on to the spoon handle, so he doesn’t choke on the spoon or the peanut butter; after a few minutes he calms down a bit.

Next, I grab the slice of bread. “Okay, now open your mouth and clamp down on the bread. You don’t have to clamp down like it's the end of the world though,” I place it in his mouth, to which he gently clamps down. I again hold the end of the bread for him. After about three minutes I tell him to bite the bread that is in his mouth and swallow it. I then pour a little milk into the small glass. “Last step Jack, alright. I am going to help you sit up, and then you need to drink the milk. I can help you hold the cup, just worry about swallowing it.” I do as I said, and help him sit up. Putting the glass up to his lips, he swallows the milk as I pour it slowly out for him. When he is done, he just sits there half asleep. Spice can kind of sap your energy it seems.

“Thanks, love,” whispers Jack. “How were you able to eat that pepper like that?”

“Well, I did grow up eating jalepeño peppers with my Grandpappy. Then when I got older and opened my bakery I wanted to know about anything I could bake with. To make that happen, I worked up the pepper scale. I started at the jalapeño pepper till I got up to the top, so I have actually had the world’s top three hottest peppers. The third is the habanero pepper, the second is the red savina pepper, and the hottest is the naga jolokia or in other words Ghost Pepper. Just be happy that you didn't eat a naga jolokia.”

“You own a bakery?” questions Willy, it seems he is quite curious about it.

I laugh a little and nod my head, “Yes, I do. We can talk more about that tomorrow; however, I think it's time to get some sleep and Jack could use the rest.”

“Ok,” responded Willy like I had just given him a ton of candy. Together, Barnabas and Sweeney take Jack to the bedroom and help him get situated. Once that's done, with many tired complaints and comments on how he is not a baby, Jack fell fast asleep. However, we all noticed another issue that we have to work out.

In the end, Victor states what we all were thinking. “Um, guys, with Jack in a bed there are only six beds left, but there are seven of us. So, uh, what are we going to, um, do for the, hmm, lady?” Of course, they all turn to look at me.

“You can have my bed Ella.” offers Tarrant, with his sweet gap-toothed smile.

Regardless of his niceness, the others seem to feel bad, because they too offer theirs to me. Watching them try to work it out, I pick the route with the least amount of possible issues. I am also much more comfortable with my idea. “Thanks, Tarrant, but I’m going to decline that offer. Look there are exactly six guys left and one woman. Meaning the one woman is going to sleep on the couch, while the seven men can all share one room. I would be much more comfortable sleeping on the couch, besides I also have the beanbags. I bet they feel awesome to sleep on anyway. With that decided, I am going to grab my clothes from the dresser, take a quick shower, and go to sleep. Goodnight guys.”

A chorus of goodnights and arguments sounds from the group of guys. Even Sweeney says good night with the undertone of a woman should never sleep on the couch. Ignoring them, I go over to the dresser and sift through my options. Eventually, I find a fuzzy blue Hogwarts nightshirt with the full Hogwarts crest on the top. Not to mention I also found red and gold Gryffindor fluffy pants. The kidnapper even included Gryffindor socks! I wonder if the kidnapper would let me take these clothes when I escape?

Leaving the men behind, I head to the bathroom to take my shower. Grabbing the violet toothbrush, I brush out my teeth till they feel nice and clean. After all, my Mommy was a dentist and if I didn’t brush my teeth, well it is a mini Armageddon. I know that it is only because she loved me and wanted to protect me, besides she hadn’t reprimanded me since I was a teen. I wish she was here so that I could talk to her again. It would be wonderful if I could call my Daddy. I mean prisoners get their one call when they're in prison, right? I wonder if that means I get one too? Regardless of the interesting mental debate on if I should get my call or not, I brush out my mountain of hair and quickly jump into the warm shower. The water pelts onto my skin and slides through my hair, washing away all of the worries and stresses of the day. I've been needing this, but eventually, I have to leave the warm bliss of the shower.

After I am dressed and ready for bed, I head out to the living room and make a little makeshift bed on the couch with a huge fluffy pillow and a thick quilt. However, as I go to lay down, Barnabas comes out with his own clothes it seems. I’m guessing he is going to take a shower also. I hope the others shower in the morning, or it'll be hard to get any sleep. The bathroom is right by the living room.

As Barnabas goes by, I decide to speak up ever so quietly, “Are you going to take a shower?”

Well, I think I spooked him, “Ella, I thought you were asleep," he whispers, "Yes, I am going to go and take a quick shower. I’m sorry if I have caused you any inconvenience.”

“No, no," I whisper out, "I was just beginning to lay down. You're perfectly fine. Enjoy your shower and goodnight, Barnabas.”

Ever so slightly, he bows his head to me. "Goodnight peaceful maiden,” and with that, he walks off and as I lay there I hear the shower start. Today has been rather eventful, has it not? Falling asleep to dreams of my family, the day I have had, the people I’ve met, and the days to come, I quickly slip into the world known only to dreamers.

#ella powers #sweeney todd #demon barber of fleet street #barnabas collins #dark shadows #edward scissorhands #willy wonka #willy wonka and the chocolate factory #tarrant hightopp #mad hatter #alice in wonderland #victor van dort #corpse bride #jack sparrow #johnny depp #some people only need a little love #k!dnapped

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slightlyrebelliouswriter23 · 2 years

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Hey Em,

I don't mean to bother you, but I've been feeling really bad about my writing lately. I'm usually pretty happy with what I write, but nowadays I've just been feeling burnt out and struggling with thinking that other people write so much better than me. Do you have any motivation? Just a few words to pick me up and help me keep going.

No pressure at all to reply, you're welcome to delete this if you want to.

Hiya nonnie! Oh, I'm so sorry to hear you've been feeling this way 🥺 maybe it'll help you to know that I understand this line of thought on a profound level, because I have lived it so many times. It can make you feel quite lonely, isolated even. Despite the fact that many writers experience this same notion at some point in their lives.

I don't know if you want a brief pep talk or a more long-winded explanation for how I personally sift through these feelings and cope, so I'll give you both, and you can choose to stay with me/this post for however long you want.

A Writer’s Guide to Not Writing

I. Pep Talk-

My pep talk to you is this: Your creative energy is precious. Your health is precious. Your words are precious.

Your words are not worse because you like someone else's writing, they're different. They serve an entirely other purpose, and that's good! The world of reading would be awful boring if everyone's writing appealed to one person's preferences. Turn insecurity into curiosity. Read voraciously. Try to focus on what you can learn from other people’s writing techniques and styles.

Your words are not worse because they’re not coming. Rest. Be kind enough to yourself to give your body time to do nothing without judgement. You'll still know how to write after. I promise you won’t forget. You won’t miss out on anything.

It'll be okay.

II. Why you feel burnout-

I go into how to prevent creative burnout in this post, but how do we cope with burnout when we’re already in it?

Burnout is what happens when you’ve either knowingly or unknowingly stretched your body to its physical limits. Not metaphorical limits, physical. This isn’t all in your head.

Think about it as a runner running a marathon and not recognising (or intentionally ignoring) the signs of dehydration or fatigue. What would happen to that runner? Their body would probably begin to shut down.

Burnout is your brain forcing you to rest because you've been working so hard, for so long, and/or in likely less-than-ideal environmental conditions. And while it's totally unfair of your brain to not warn you before entering the burnout phase, there’s not really much you can do once there. The more you fight it, the worse it tends to get.

You wouldn’t try to keep running after experiencing fatigue, either, so I want you to sit for a bit with the feeling of Not Writing. Know that it’s okay to not produce or create. And if you don’t vibe with the whole “do it to be kind to yourself” schtick, do it as a direct protest against a society that teaches us our worth is intrinsically linked to our productivity.

Give yourself permission to just exist.

In the ADHD community, we have a sort of mantra that goes “Follow the dopamine”, which essentially just means “Do what feels good to your brain in the moment and the motivation will follow”. I’d amend this mantra for the burnout writer community to “Follow the joy”. Find things (apart from writing) that bring you joy, and do those. Do things that add emotional value/enrichment to your life.

When you are content with Not Writing, that's when you'll know it's time to write again.

III. Why you feel jealous/insecure-

I also want to touch on feelings of jealousy and insecurity, because I often feel those things when it comes to my writing, too. No writer is immune.

The human brain is hardwired to notice differences and make connections. So it’s natural that we would see differences in other people’s work or accomplishments, realise that we like their work or want the skills/recognition that they have, and immediately link their success to the things that make them or their work different from ours.

But brains often make mistakes and link two unrelated things. Correlation does not equal causation. You’re not bad at writing just because you see someone else’s skillset and it’s different from what yours looks like.

To explain this further, I always think of jealousy and insecurity as being two sides of the same coin. The coin is fear. On one side, you have insecurity–which is fear turned inward. On the other side, you have jealousy–which is fear turned outward.

Both sides come from a place of perceived lack. Insecurity is a fear that you inherently lack something that others have, and you blame yourself for that perceived lack. Jealousy is a fear that you won’t ever get what others have, and you blame other people (either directly or indirectly) for getting in the way of that.

Both feelings are completely morally neutral, though, so it’s important not to attach judgement to them when they arise. But you also have to acknowledge them, or they won’t pass.

I’d encourage you to keep reading. And when you read other people’s writing, approach it with a mindset of curiosity. I often ask myself:

What makes this piece good?

What makes it engaging?

What, specifically, do I like about it?

How can I implement those things into my own work?

Are there any similarities between my writing and this work?

Is there anything I can learn from this person’s writing?

Become a student again. What better way is there to cure insecurity than to learn from others and build your own skillset?

If it’s fanfiction or any piece posted on a social platform, comment the things you enjoyed/admire about that person’s work! Showing genuine appreciation for other people’s talent by paying sincere compliments is scientifically proven to open up compassion pathways in the brain, which makes it easier for you to recognise what is good in your own work.

Kindness is a boomerang. Give and you shall receive.

✦✦✦✦✦

So, what’s the overall message?

Rest until you’re okay with resting.

Follow the joy.

Curiosity and kindness are medicines.

Your creative energy will come back.

I promise.

I really hope this helped! My inbox is always open to writing advice. All the love in the world to you, nonnie.

-Em 🖤🗡

Creative Burnout and How to Ward Against It

Writing Advice Masterlist

Writing Masterlist

#writing tips #writing advice #writing motivation #writer's block #writing #writer #creative burnout #burnout #writer's life #writers of tumblr #ao3 #fanfic #fanfiction #my advice #a writer's guide to not writing

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yurtletheturtlehenderson · 3 years

Text

COSMIC - S1:E1; Chapter One, The Vanishing of Will Byers - [Pt. 1]

A Will Byers x Male!Reader Series

𝘖𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘢 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥'𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦, 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘨 𝘞𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘴 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘧𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘏𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘶𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘣𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦, 𝘢 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘱 𝘰𝘧 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥.

𝐍𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐄𝐑 𝟔𝐓𝐇, 𝟏𝟗𝟖𝟑

𝐇𝐀𝐖𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐒, 𝐈𝐍𝐃𝐈𝐀𝐍𝐀

𝐇𝐀𝐖𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐒 𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐋𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘 𝐔.𝐒 𝐃𝐄𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐆𝐘

The night is quiet, as it always has been in this small corner of Indiana, and yet this night is unlike any other. The halls were especially bare, occupied only by the melody of the generator humming as it struggled to pump light throughout the twisted maze of halls. That was, until...

BAM

The steel door rips open, colliding fast and hard with the walls withab fantastic thud. Swallowing all remaining silence along with it, was the cry of alarms that flood the hallway as he runs for his life. The man finds himself at the elevator, furiously slamming his hand against the elevator button hoping just maybe it might make the elevator come faster. As he does so, the man continues to look over his shoulder in a panic.

He knows its after him.

BOOM

He knows its close.

The man is thrilled to hear the soft ding of the elevator signaling it's arrival. Before the doors are even opened all the way the man quickly ducks through and proceeds to frantically hit the UP button inside the elevator.

The doors begin to close.

For a second he believes he just might make it. But that doesn't completely cast away the fear as he can't seem to take his eyes off of the eerie hallway, expecting it's arrival. The man attempts to calm his breathing. His hopes of escaping are growing stronger as things quiet down.

That's when he hears it.

That... Thing.

It takes every remaining ounce of courage for the man to slowly look up, but on some level, he already knows he is done for.

A low growl is heard above him followed by an unusual yet terrifying squeak.

The man's screams were cut off with the shut of the doors as he is yanked up towards the ceiling of the elevator. The man is no more.

|| 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝐏𝐎𝐕 ||

It's quiet. The faint sound of sprinklers outside can be heard as we wait for Mike to continue. We are all on the edge of our seats. It's already hard enough they still can't find proper seating for me since I officially joined the party, so, for now, I'm wedged between my best friend Will and my brother Dustin.

"Something is coming. Something hungry for blood," Mike says, his voice barely above a whisper. "A shadow grows on the wall behind you, swallowing you in darkness."

Subconsciously we all slowly lean in waiting for whatever happens next.

"It is almost here."

"What is it?" Will asks suddenly, no longer capable of containing his curiosity.

This time it's Dustin who cuts in, "What if it's the Demogorgon?"

I take a deep breath in suspense. Out of the corner of my eye, Will practically throws himself back in his seat.

"Oh, Jesus, we're so screwed if it's the Demogorgon." Dustin rambles on.

Lucas speaks up, "It's not the Demogorgon." He sounds very sure of himself which gives me more confidence.

We all jump a little in our seats when Mike slams one of the game pieces down in front of us suddenly as he shouts "An army of troglodytes charge into the chamber!"

I sigh in great relief as Lucas gives a very smug and quite frankly, sassy look to Dustin as he props his elbow on the back of his chair which earns a soft chuckle from me.

"Troglodytes?" Dustin asks in disbelief.

"Told ya," I roll my eyes at Lucas despite the smile that grows on my face.

Everyone shares a good laugh, all of us relieved when my eyes meet Will's and we share a smile and a shake of the head as if silently saying 'I can't believe we were so worried for nothing'.

Simultaneously all of our smiles melt away when Mike starts looking around as he says "Wait a minute. Did you hear that?"

"That...That sound," he says softly.

"Boom... Boom," his voice is getting slightly louder with each 'boom'. We all stare at Mike expectantly, hanging on to his every word.

"BOOM!" Mike is shouting at this point as he slams his hands against the wooden surface making the table as well as all of us jump.

I always get too into these games, I realize. My heart is racing as adrenaline courses through my veins. I look over and it seems when I jumped I grabbed on to the nearest thing next to me which happened to be Will's arm. Sheepishly, I retract my hand and look back at Mike in anticipation.

"That didn't come from the troglodytes. No, that... That came from something else." Mike continues.

We all look around at each other as we wait for Mike.

In an instant, Mike slams down the next figure on the board and exclaims, "The Demogorgon!"

'Yep. We're screwed.'

The silence is replaced with all of our defeated groans. Dustin sighs and says, "We're in deep shit."

Mike suddenly says, "Will, your action!"

"I don't know!" Will sounded desperate.

We're all on edge, but the boys are completely panicking.

"Fireball him!" Lucas shouts.

"I'd have to roll a 13 or higher!"

"Too risky." Dustin cuts in. "Cast a protection spell!"

Lucas turns to Will and says "Don't be a pussy," I roll my eyes. "Fireball him!"

At this point, Lucas and Dustin are just yelling at each other.

"Cast protection."

Our attention is quickly brought back to Mike when he shouts, "The Demogorgon is tired of your silly human bickering! It stomps towards you."

"BOOM!"

"FIREBALL HIM!"

"Another stomp. BOOM."

"Cast. Protection."

"He roars in anger!"

At this point, everyone is yelling over one another; it's utter chaos, and finally I snap.

"Oh, come on, I'M tired of your silly human bickering, just let the boy roll!" It's hard to be heard over all the yelling but, by some miracle,, they manage to hear me and it's quiet for a split second as Will gets a chance to speak.

"And, FIREBALL!" He throws the dice on the table out of excitement and they go flying onto the floor.

"Oh shit!"

We all jump to our feet, scrambling to find the dice in anticipation.

"Where'd it go?" Lucas asks. "Where is it?"

Will almost sounded defensive, "I don't know!"

"Is it a 13?"

"How are we supposed to know if we haven't found the dice yet, Dustin?" I retort.

"Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!" Dustin chants as he paces back and forth. I roll my eyes as I continue to search on my hands and knees.

"Mike," It was Mrs. Wheeler.

"Mom we're in the middle of a campaign!" Mike exclaims.

"You mean the end? Fifteen after."

Mike sighs, exasperated and runs up the stairs.

I hear Lucas accuse Will. "Oh, my God! Freaking Idiot!"

"Lucas," I ease. "come on, it's not his fault. We were all caught up in the game. Let's just focus on- OH! Found 'em!"

I jump to my feet, pointing down at the D-20 for my friends to see and not wanting to tamper with the roll. The boys come running over and practically trampled me in the process.

"Shit, it's a seven." We all groan in frustration, especially Will.

"Does a seven count?" Will asked hopefully.

"Did Mike see it?" Lucas counters.

"Well, no."

"Then it doesn't count."

I sigh, beginning to pack up my bags and tidy up my mess knowing it was time to leave. The others do the same.

"Why do we have to leave?" Will asks sadly as we head up the stairs. "It was just getting good,"

"I know," I swing my arm off his shoulder dramatically with a sigh as we head up the basement stairs and for the garage door. "I know. But hey, just think how awesome the next one will be, eh?" I tease trying to get my best friend to smile.

|| 𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐥'𝐬 𝐏𝐎𝐕 ||

Y/n has always been so good at cheering people up, I have no idea how he does it.

"Hey, guys. I'm sorry we had to end it so soon." Y/n and I turn around looking at Mike.

"No sweat, Mikey." Y/n shrugs, with a smile.

I love that smile. Suddenly his arm leaves my shoulder, and I frown a little.

I sigh inwardly, I've had such a bad crush on Y/n since he and Dustin moved here in the 4th grade. He has no idea... I hope. I always admired him from afar, that is until he finally convinced Dustin to let him into the party. We were all glad to have him, Dustin can be a little overprotective is all. I'm not sure about Dustin, but as for Mike and Lucas, they know I like him. Those guys can read me like a book, and once they caught on there was no convincing them otherwise.

I'm really lucky to have them as friends. They've never made me feel bad for who I am.

"Hey, Mike? Where is Dustin?" Y/n asks.

That's a good point, I realize. He was right behind us but he hasn't come outside yet.

"I think he went upstairs to give the leftovers to Nancy."

"Oh okay. I'll just wait here then. Uh oh, your plant is dying" Y/n said suddenly, kneeling down by the withering plant by the patio.

"Yeah, that's my mom's tomato plant. That thing is hopeless. She basically gave up on it."

"Well, I might be able to help," he said thoughtfully, beginning to scan the garage. "Where do you keep your gardening- Oh, never mind!"

He quickly runs over to the shelves, retrieving some old packets and ran back over to the plant, kneeling beside it.

You can always tell when he is concentrating; he always does this cute thing where he furrows his brow and chews his lip. My stomach does a little flip when i realize I was staring again and I quickly refocus my attention on my vest zipper. I still manage to see Y/n fiddling with the the packet tonget it open, finally sprinkling the contents into the dirt before mixing it in with his finger. All the while, he mutters words of encouragement towards it. I remember him telling me one day about a study conducted on plants and how it was proved that they respond well to positive feedback, and the memory makes me smile. He was so fascinated by it; it was hard not to be as excited about it as he was when he told us about it.

Y/n stands up, brushing himself off and smiles at Mike and then me.

I kinda froze, not in panic but in awe. He just radiates warmth, and positivity effortlessly.

"What?" He chuckles as he smiles at me.

I shake my head in embarrassment and look away, zipping up my vest and getting on my bike.

Lucas just rolls his eyes at my behavior. He's always telling me to just go for it but it's not that easy. I think he's tired of my bashfulness but still understands why I'm scared.

We all look to the door when we hear it slam. It's Dustin.

"There's something wrong with your sister." He grumbles.

"What are you talking about?"

"She's got a stick up her butt."

"Yeah," Lucas joins in. "It's because she's been dating that douche bag, Steve Harrington."

"Yeah, she's turning into a real jerk."

"She's always been a real jerk!" Mike interrupts.

"Nuh-uh. She used to be cool, like the time she dressed up as an elf for our elder tree campaign." With that, Dustin headed off on his bike, followed by Y/n but not before sending me a smile and thanking Mike.

"It was a seven," I tell him, thinking back on the campaign.

"Huh?"

"The roll, it was a seven. The Demogorgon, it got me."

Mike seems a bit shocked at my truthfulness, but ultimately shrugs it off, nodding. I nod back.

"See you later!" I say as I start peddling away.

I catch up just in time to see Lucas bid his goodbyes.

"Good night, ladies!" He chimes.

"Kiss your mom 'night for me," Dustin calls before looking over at me.

"Race you back to my place? Winner gets a comic?"

Before I can respond Y/n speaks up, "and am I included this time, like at all?"

"Course not," he says nonchalantly. I shake my head, feeling kinda bad for him, but I know it's just sibling banter.

"Well then," he scoffs. "Don't be surprised if your bike tires mysteriously deflate one day, Dustin. There's all kinds of weirdos out here,"

I laugh, and Dustin just ignores him.

"Any comic?" I ask.

"Yeah!" As we are about to start we both look back when we hear Y/n frantically yelling, "Shit! DUSTIN HELP!"

I look back to see him winking at me with a smile on his face. Automatically realizing what he is up to, I booked it.

Fortunately for me, Dustin wasn't so quick. I could hear his frantic cries, "Jesus, Y/n what's wrong-? HEY, WHAT THE HELL?!"

There it is. Although, I was already far ahead.

"DAMMIT Y/N, IF I LOSE YOU OWE ME A COMIC BOOK!"

I can hear Y/n's laughter from here and it makes me smile. As the laughter grows more and more distant, I hear "GO WILL, GO!"

Somehow my smile gets bigger, and my legs go faster.

"Hey! Hey! Get back here! I'm gonna kill you! BOTH of you!"

"I'll take your X-Men 134!" I shout as I pass his house and take the shortcut to my own.

As I slow down my mind starts to wonder; It wanders to the campaign today. It wanders to how Y/n helped me win the race and my new comic book just moments ago. It wanders to Y/n grabbing my arm during the campaign and how I don't think I've ever blushed that hard... My mind wanders to Y/n.

Sometimes I really hate how much I like him. How I can't get him out of my head. He just has always been such a good friend to me and I just don't get how someone can be so nice, and thoughtful and-

My thoughts are cut short when I notice my bike light flickering. I look down at it in confusion. Just then it comes back on. I look back at the road and I see a disturbingly tall, ominous figure staring me down. My heart practically stops in the figure's wake.

My body reacted before my mind could; I yanked my bike right and as I cruise down the ditch, my bike topples over and I'm sent to the muddy ground. It takes me a second to gather my senses as I warily pick myself up and try and get a glimpse of what I just saw. My heart starts racing faster as I hear an alarming and indistinct growling. I'm whimpering at this point but I don't care. I ditch my bike without a second thought and book it as fast as I can in the direction of my house.

I'm sniveling and panting as I make it through the fog that covers the road in front of my house. I make it on to the porch, throw open the door, and slam it shut just as fast. My fingers fumble to secure every single lock on the door and for the first time in my life I wonder why we don't have more. All the while, Chester is barking like crazy.

"Mom?" I'm running through the house looking in every room for any sign of my mom or Jonathan.

"Jonathan? Mom?"

'Crap they must be working. Crap! No No No!'

I run back into the living room and throw the blinds over my head, wincing as it hit the back of my head. But I waste no time in cupping my hands up against the glass to get a better look at the yard to see if I can spot the figure.

My stomach drops what feels like ten stories.

I can see it in the distance right between the sheets that were hung out to dry.

It's just standing there. Menacingly. (a/n: If you understood that reference, and actually thought it was funny let's be friends please 😂)

It starts stomping towards the house.

I gasp and start running for the phone.

I hastily pick the phone up from the mount and my fingers are shaking as I try and dial 911 as fast as possible.

I can hear it ringing. I can hear the click as if someone picked up. I waste no time, "Hello? HELLO?!"

All I can hear over the phone now is static, and then a disturbing, yet familiar screech-like growl. Chester's barking is getting louder and more frequent indicating that It's right outside. I slowly peer around the corner to look at the glass window on the door and I can barely make out the menacing shadowy figuring looming outside the door. I can hear it growling from outside.

Chester's barks quickly turn into whimpers as he backs away towards me.

Then the unthinkable happens.

The chain lock on the inside of the door starts unlocking itself.

'Shit!'

At this point, I realize I'm never going to be able to outrun it so I'm going to have to at least try to defend myself. I remember the gun we keep in the shed out back and make a run for it, not even bothering to hang up the phone. I nearly trip on my own feet as I run for the shed. I make it inside and slam the shed door behind me in the process. I quickly but carefully take the gun off the wall and set it on the shelf as I scramble for the ammo. My fingers are still trembling as I fumble to put the bullets in the magazine.

Once I finally get the magazine in, I pick up the gun and aim it at the shed door waiting. It seems as though I can't even keep the gun steady since my entire body is completely tremoring, even my unsteady breaths.

It has to be close by now.

As if on cue I hear the deep growling that I've already heard twice tonight and for a couple of moments I think it's outside. But then I realize why it sounds so close.

It's in the shed with me.

It's behind me.

The fear is nearing paralyzing, but I still manage to command my body to turn around to get a look at this relentless monster. When I see it I just stand there in utter disbelief, the gun slowly and subconsciously lowering to my side in shock. I'm completely frozen in place as I stare at the beast in front of me. The hanging light bulb above me glows intensively brighter with every passing second. The last thing I see before I'm cloaked in pure white light and an unbearable chill is the monster's long arm reaching out for me.

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

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#you'll float queue #cosmic #cosmic 1 #m!cosmic #will byers x reader #will byers x male!reader #reader insert #stranger things #x male!reader #y/n henderson #will byers #dustin henderson #lucas sinclair #mike wheeler #the vanishing of will byers

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eclipsedpascal · 3 years

Text

You Deserve This

Andy Dolan x Female Reader

GIF by @kissxmedeadly !!

“The reader asking Andy about his kiddo (let's pretend is a lil boy 🤣) and him being very emotional about it and the reader who truly loves him conforts him 😭❤️” - anon

Please read the warnings!!

Warnings: use of drugs (weed), smut, oral (female receiving), slight public sex, slight angst, mentions of rehab, mentions of suicidal thoughts, a lil bit of crying and VERY slight Eden spoilers, but thats only if you don't want to know anything AT ALL, so basically none? idk lmao:)

Notes: hi! So this is my first Andy fic, I wrote it very quickly last night after a sudden burst of inspiration and it doesn't make too much sense, also it’s kinda cheesy? I don't think I've ever written anything this angsty or soft before, but i’m trying to be more in touch w my emotions nd this is my way of doing that, so hopefully i'll do more things like this soon:) also if you’re interested, the title is one of my favourite songs by Men I Trust that I just thought fit Andy well.

Word count: 1.8k

●●●●●●●●

The warm, dancing breeze washed over your skin, plucking up your many goosebumps and blowing the rainbow coloured sea of petals that decorated the large garden from left to right. The bittersweet mix of their fragrances and Andy’s blunt rushed to you and filled your scrunched up, wrinkled nose as you let out a loud laugh. The vibrant expanse of fluffy grass felt close to a mattress underneath you, cradling your form whilst you laid amongst the greenery and watched Andy ghost a deep inhale of the blunt he had balanced precariously between two fingers. He flopped his arm across the gap between you and offered you another toke, the dopey smile spread over his features making you laugh even more.

“What’s so funny? Hmm?” He questioned you jokingly, rolling onto his forearms and bringing his face to hover just above yours as you brought the blunt to your lips. You couldn't hold in your laughter, your drug hazed state and the breeze that pushed his brown curls to tickle your blushing skin only exaggerating your amusement further as you choked out clouds of smoke.

“What??” He joined in laughing, finding humour in his own confusion and finding your laugh infectious. His lips found your own in a sudden yet gentle kiss which you gladly embraced, still not managing to fully compose yourself as you giggled into his open mouth.

You did your best to pull back from the kiss, but were reminded you didn't really have anywhere to go when you felt a blade of grass flutter against your ear. “It’s just.. your smile.” You rested your blunt carrying hand on his cheek as you spoke, feeling your heart swell when he pulled an overdramatic expression of insult at your reply.

“What’s so wrong with my smile?!” He half faked offence, not understanding what you could possibly find so amusing about it as you giggled more and more. “What’s wrong with it?- is it my lips? ‘They not good enough for you baby?” His thick accent aided his voice, making him sound even more attractive than he already was as he joked with you.

“Noo! it definitely wasn’t your lips, cause I love those.” You gripped his locks a little firmer, biting your lip as his stare changed from one of curiosity to one of want.

“Oh yeah?” He leaned back down and kissed you again, but this time rougher, the weed made you feel as if his lips were slowly melting into your own as it sent strong signals of lust through your body. He put all his weight on one arm, lifting the other and groping your waist with it whilst simultaneously moving to trail wet kisses down your neck.

His touches were deep, yet executed so delicately it convinced you if he was any rougher, you might just break. He opened the buttons of the flowing shirt you wore; one you had stolen out of his wardrobe that morning. He moved his head further down your chest to your stomach, mouth racing in slow motion to reach you were he wanted to most.

Forgetting to explain why you found his smile so funny in the first place, your high carried your thoughts closer towards how incredible his mouth felt on your skin, making you lean into his touch and let out a few small mewls.

As he reached your panty line, he tapped your hip, signalling for you to lift them so he could take your shorts off. He slid them off your legs in a quick, smooth motion that had them landing on a nearby lavender bush. The garden had quite a large variety of blossoming shrubbery and many clusters of beautiful flowers, it was probably down to the bi-weekly gardeners Andy had hired. You had known they were expensive and after spending so much time like this, lazing around, surrounded by the expensive home’s nature, you were beginning to understand why he had hired them.

You returned your gaze from the dangling shorts, back to the man nestled between your bare thighs. His beard was scratching at your skin in the best way possible as he laid small kisses over the thin fabric that covered your cunt. His hot breathe felt like fire as you wriggled and squirmed below him, just wanting some kind of contact from him.

He used two fingers to peel your panties to the side, groaning at the site of your glistening folds before kissing your clit gently. His tongue started swiping across your cunt slowly, taking all the time in the world to make you feel as good as he knew he could. You moaned loudly, grabbing at his hair once more as he sucked on you deeply.

“Mr Dolan?” You were interrupted by a throat clearing before hearing a man speak; one of Andy’s many servants you guessed. They had never seemed to leave the two of you alone whilst you had been staying there. No matter how big his home was, you always seemed to find another at every corner.

Andy looked up to the man with question and annoyance, raising an eyebrow at him as he wished for him to just hurry up and leave so the two of you could continue with your escapades. “It’s the phone for you Mr Dolan. Your son.”

Andy quickly rose from his place below you, his mind abandoning all thought of the act he was just partaking in as he jogged past the glass doors of his home, wanting only to speak to the young boy.

You sat up slightly, doing up a few buttons of your shirt and laying your crossed legs to the side of you as you held yourself up with your arm. You watched him as he scrambled into the house after his servant, little red marks from where he had been lying in the grass next to you were noticeably imprinted on the skin of his left arm, the one he had been leaning on, and his open shirt was flowing behind him with the speed he was moving.

You looked down to the flowers on front of you, picking a single daisy that bore tinted, pink tips on the end of each slim, white petal, twirling the stem around between two of your fingers as you listened to the breeze pick up. You could feel the mood of the air change as he left, the wind feeling more cold an irritating than once before as you pondered the call Andy was having.

You knew how desperate he had been to speak to his son again. It had been months since he had spoken to him without his ex-wife being the messenger. He missed him more than he knew to describe.

His recent divorce had been what had fuelled him to return home to Eden; hoping to find solace in the paradise he knew so well after feeling as if he had lost himself entirely. Spending too many years constantly playing other people had taken more of a toll on him than he had realised, that was until he was sent to rehab. After getting out, he felt as if staying in Eden was the only way for him to climb out of the dark hole he had managed to find himself in. Unfortunately, this journey of finding himself had meant making the decision to leave his son behind in Los Angles. Something he didn't like to speak on much.

When you had first met him in rehab however, he had been extremely open about his life, telling you how anger was the only emotion he could really feel anymore. Explaining that if he wasn’t at least the slightest amount intoxicated, he didn't think he couldn't go on with living; especially after the recent downfall of his career being showcased for the entire world to see. It was dark stuff, but you understood each other. That’s a big part of what made you grow so close.

You picked off petal after petal from the daisy, watching its beauty fade with each pluck and letting each one slowly blow into the breeze, creating a tragic stream as they blew away from you and down to the not so far off shoreline. As you plucked the last petal, you admired the daisy, still glowing with pollen and beaming in the sunlight despite have lost so many important parts of it. You stuck it into your shirt pocket and fell back down to lay on the grass as you waited for Andy to finish his call.

It had been maybe ten minutes you were lying with your eyes closed, enjoying the heat that beamed down from the clear, Australian sky when you finally heard the slow footsteps that you knew to be Andy’s, pattering along the grass. You shot up from where you lay to see the dopey-smiled man who had left you in the garden just fifteen minutes before, only to be faced with a red-eyed, teary one.

“Andy what happened? Are you okay?” He fell down onto the grass besides you, staring at you but completely wordless. You felt as if you could see into his soul. He was feeling so many emotions he hadn’t even been able to grasp at in so long. It was overwhelming him and you knew it. You reached out to stroke is cheek, concern running through you for the man that you had grown to love so dearly over the past few months.

He looked up “She’s gonna let me see him. T-They’re coming over next month.” A tear fell from his face as he smiled harder than you had ever seen him smile before. He was finally going to see his son after all these long months and you couldn’t have been any happier for him.

“Really?! That’s amazing, oh my god!” You moved forwards, wrapping your arms over his large shoulders and squeezing him in a hug so full of love it was palpable. “You really got to speak to him this time?” You questioned him once more before pulling away from his grasp, thinking back to the many times his ex-wife had promised he could speak with the boy but decided at the last minute he wouldn’t get to.

“Yeah!.. he uhh,” He took in a shaky breath, chuckling with joy as he recalled hearing the young boy’s voice so filled with excitement and energy over the phone. “He said he couldn't wait to meet you! You know, when I told him about you.” He stumbled over his words, running a hand through his hair as he shook with nerves, doing his best to calm himself.

In that moment, you felt your love for him soar higher than it ever had before. You were so proud of the progress he had made, and you knew his son would be too. “And I cant wait to meet him either.” You rested your forehead against his, the two of you enjoying a stand still and bathing in the happiness you both felt in the beautiful moment. The sound of the ever present breeze occupied your ears as the laughter emitting from two of you joined it, echoing a song throughout the garden that wouldn’t be forgotten any time soon.

●●●●●●●●

Thank you sm for reading!!🥺💗

Tags: @celestialrequiem @ntxoza @dark-mei-rose @sojournmichael @blakescoven @ritualmichael @ghostangels @fernfiction @ferndolan @brattylovee @7-wonders @angelicmichael @melodylangdon @brooklinn13 @kitty4860 @lavenderahs @michaellangdonstanaccount @9layerdevilfoodcake @chicaluna2410 @plymptxn-reborn I've just tagged anyone who I thought might be interested as per usual, but if you would to be removed feel free to let me know!! you can also lemme know if you would like to be added to the tag list too:)

#Andy Dolan #Andy Dolan x female reader #Andy Dolan x reader #dad!Andy Dolan #dad!Andy Dolan x female reader #dad!Andy Dolan x reader #Andy Dolan fic #Andy Dolan smut #Andy Dolan imagine #cody fern #Cody Fern fic #eden fic #my writing

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forsworned · 3 years

Text

[♥] academyau!substitute teacher {renguko kyojuro x reader}

Genre: Slight Fluff, Comedy

Categories: F/M

Relationships: Kyoujuro Renguko/Reader, Giyuu Tomioka/Reader

word count: 2,538

a/n: this is a pretty long read, so read at your own risk of boredom. i guess it could also b classified as a "x giyuu" but the title is just way too long and kind of throws the main focus off. might turn this into multiple parts so let me know what y'all think! also this is just a filler for the requests i have rn i don't want to leave you guys hanging

❀⊱┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄⊰❀

"I literally don't know shit about history."

Giyu sighed in exasperation. "You don't need to know anything about history [first name]. The teacher already has a lesson plan and you literally just need to pass out the papers. I just need you to cover for a couple of a days because one of the teachers are out sick."

You groaned as you threw your head back in annoyance, pushing your feet up against the edge of your desk. Even though it didn't look it Giyu was practically begging you to substitute for one of his coworkers. And he almost never asks for favors.

Giyu ran a hand through his hair. "He's super picky with his subs and everyone he's had come in hasn't come back."

"So you're saying that I'm a good pick." You mused, with your head in your hands with an annoying smug look.

"Don't push it."

You scrunched your face in disgust. "I just really, really don't want to Giyu. Middle school kids are the absolute worst. All they do is make moaning noises and forget or neglect to wear deodarant."

Giyu lightly chuckled. Your eyes darted to watch his usually solemn demeanor melted away into a small smile which immediately disappeared when you caught wind of it.

He cleared his throat and continued to speak like nothing happened.

"Anyway, so you'll do it?"

You rolled your eyes.

"Yeah, whatever. I'll do it."

Giyu looked pleased with himself when he heard your answer.

"I mean after all, I do owe you like a million and one favors." You sarcastically mused.

Which you kind of did. Giyu was your childhood best friend and always kept your out trouble in the nick of time. Whether it was you getting chased down by the neighborhood cat, or when you got gum stuck in your hair and you didn't want your parents to find out so he quickly snipped it out of your hair with everything seemingly in place like nothing happened. Yeah you could say you were a bit of troublemaker growing up, but Giyu was like the older brother that always looked after you.

"I'm so glad you realized." He replied cooly. "Be here by 7:30AM. Don't be late, I already have enough on my plate and I don't need you embarassing me."

You used your hand to shoo him out of your office space. "Mhm, you can leave now."

"I'm serious."

"Yup."

He squinted his eyes at you."[first name]"

"Ok! I got it. I'll be there 7:30 sharp." You exclaimed throwing your arms up in surrender.

He smirked in satisfaction. "Good."

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

The morning air was crisp as the sun shone down on your blurred eyes. You absolutely dreaded waking up in the morning and despite that you still agreed to be here. Oh, how you hated that man.

"Good morning." A familiar voice muffled beside you.

Speak of the devil.

He was munching away at his raisin bread walking next to you in the most nonchalant manner. Typical Giyu.

"Shut up." You mumbled miserably.

"You know, you could be a little nicer."

Your eyes narrowed at him. Expression in full death stare mode, but Giyu was as cool as ever, and as always completely unfazed by your behavior. But before you could retaliate, middle and highschool girls were practically lining up to say good morning to Giyu, blushing like mad when he acknowledged them. You on the other hand, were getting the death stares and whispers instead.

"Must be nice to be the heart throb PE teacher." You teased, poking him with your binder.

Giyu ignored you as you walked into the building, showing you to your classroom. You ignored the stares of kids burning holes through your back as you analyzed everything. Tons of inspirational historical quotes lined the walls, pictures and signatures of past and possibly current students covered one single wall. You inspected closely trying to catch a glimpse of who the teacher you were substituting for. One person in particular caught your eye, and he was hot. With a capital H. But before you could look at the other pictures to confirm Giyu called you over.

"Miss [last name], can you come up to the front and introduce yourself."

You sighed as you approached the front of the classroom and watched as the students all stood up. As their whispers got louder, you had to resist the urge to roll your eyes.

"Good morning class. I'm going to be your substitute teacher for the day as Mr.--"You glanced over at the desk and moved the plaque in your direction. "--Renguko is out sick today."

As the class bowed in respect getting their good morning greetings, some of the children could't help but show their disappointment. You noticed most of them girls.

"I'll leave them to you." Giyu stated, and then looked at the class. "And be good to your substitute. I don't want to hear anyone misbehaving."

They bowed as he exited the room and now all eyes were on you. You sighed to yourself.

I really gotta learn to say no sometimes.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

To say you were exhausted was an understatement. It’s not that you hated kids or anything, but they always just see to have so much energy and well, you didn’t. Not even a cup of coffee could save you right now. You watched as the clock above your desk ticked and felt yourself getting more and more sleepier by the moment. Your consciousness fleeting as you lie under your warm blankets.

The image of that fiery haired man popped into your head and your eyes shot open.

You totally forgot to ask Giyu about that hot guy!

You let out a loud groan, knowing that your timing was off because now he would most definitely be suspicious if you asked him tomorrow. The curiosity of knowing that man itched at your skin. You absolutely had to know who he was.

What if he was a high school student, or worse a middle school student who looked very grown.

You outwardly icked at the thought, closing your eyes and scrunching your face in disgusted.

No way. He definitely had to be an adult. Maybe even a teacher.

“The history teacher!” You exclaimed out loud, shooting your whole body up.

It had to be him. You smiled victoriously to yourself, mentally patting yourself in the back.

And you had the perfect plan set up to find out.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You had to have looked in the mirror for about three hours to make sure you looked absolutely stunning. Hair curled to frame your face perfectly, and make up subtle but very much enhancing your natural features. You rubbed your lips one more time in the mirror before smacking your hands to your face to wake yourself up. Giyu was not going to be happy.

The morning bells chimed and you were seated at the desk welcoming students as they walked in. You discreetly checked your make up in your compact mirror under the desk to make sure nothing was running and not a hair was out of place.

“Perfect.” You whispered to yourself, running a hand through your blow out. All this work for a man that probably wasn’t even a teacher here.

“Miss [last name], what are you doing here.”

You froze at the voice. Nothing could prepare you for the icy glare that Giyu shot down at you. It sent a shiver down your spine. But his glare melted right off of you as you glanced over to the man next to him. Your mystery man finally come true!

“Oh hello, Mr. Tomioka. It’s pleasure seeing you.” You smiled, standing up. You looked right over to the handsome man right next to him. His hair like rays of sunlight with eyes to match. You could barely contain your excitement. “And you must be Mr. Renguko.”

His smile as big as the sun. Scratch that. He was the sun.

Bright, beautiful and fiery. He physically made you warmer just being in his very presence. You could’ve sworn you heard simultaneous female sighs in admiration, but you were way too distracted by how utterly gorgeous he was.

“Yes, I am.” He cheerfully stated. “And you must be the substitute that was in for me yesterday.”

He took your hand in his and you could’ve sworn you melted at his touch. Finely calloused hands, indicating that he worked with his hands a lot. Not that his physique couldn’t already tell you how absolutely fit he was.

“Yes, I am. Your class was wonderful. I didn’t have any problems with them whatsoever.” You couldn’t help but smile from ear to ear. This really was the man and it took every ounce of you not to pinch yourself to see if you were awake or not.

“So are you going to tell me why exactly you’re here today.” Giyu chimed in. This time his icy glare had no effect.

“Oh yes, I thought I was still scheduled for today. I never heard anything back from Mr.Tomioka so I assumed that I would head back in.” You lied right through your teeth and Giyu could see right through it.

He narrowed his eyes at you. “And I remember emailing you last night confirming that Mr. Renguko was fully recovered and ready to work again.”

You couldn’t see it but Giyu was totally spitting out venom with every single word he spoke. It was almost terrifying, but you were way too distracted by the glow of the man that was the literal sun right beside you.

As if the smile on your face couldn’t get any bigger.

“That’s odd. I don’t remember getting an email.” You innocently put a finger to your lip, and looked upward as if you were searching your head for the memory of the email confirmation that you definitely recall getting.

Giyu’s went from you to Mr.Renguko. And then it finally clicked for him. His shoulder dropped in defeat. He did not have the strength required to dealing with your shenanigans today. He turned around heading out the classroom, raising a hand to dismissively.

“Just don’t burn the place down.”

You gave him two big thumbs up. “You got it!”

"So would you like to observe the class since you're already here?" Mr.Renguko interjected. He motioned to the empty seat right beside his desk and chair.

You beamed at him. "Only if that's okay with your class, of course."

"Oh trust me, they are more than okay with that." He grinned at the students. Most of them smiled and blushed looking away from your direction. You sat there in confusion, but before you could inquire about what he said, he shot out of his seat and grabbed the stack of papers on his desk.

"Alright, class we are going to go over your classwork from yesterday and finish the rest of chapter six."

☆彡

It seemed like forever until Mr.Renguko had settled into his seat while he let his students work together on their classwork.

"I can see why my students are such big fans of you." He mused. You looked up from your phone and saw him warmly grinning at your face. This time you didn't fight the blood rushing to the surface of your cheeks.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Well," He pulled out a stack of notecards and began shuffling through them. "I always have my students write their own evaluations of my substitutes and yours were outstanding. Lots of compliments about your appearance and how you carried the class."

Evaluation? Appearance?

Your jaw went slightly aslack at his words. The only thing that left your lips: "Evaluations...?"

His grin grew. Mr.Rengoku knew that this had caught you off guard but he continued. "Yes, I like to know what substitutes are doing their job and keeping my students in line and comfortable."

You were almost speechless. "Wow, you must really care about your students."

He smiled softly this time, and fondly looked over at his students working diligently and quietly together. "Yes, I do. They're kind of like my own kids. I want the very best for them."

Just when you thought you couldn't admire him anymore that you already did. Hot and caring? It had to be too good to be true. You pointed to the best teacher of the year awards on his desk. "I guess you didn't get those just based off your looks alone then."

He visibly blushed and chuckled at you statement as he rubbed the back of his head. "Nah, I don't think so."

You raised an eyebrow at him and pointed at the wall of photos and signatures that lined his wall. "That wall definitely says otherwise."

He laughed a hearty laugh this time. "I don't really think that's the case. Like I said I just look after my students like their my own. They really are my pride and joy."

It really was incredibly hard to not let yourself melt into a puddle in his presence alone. But before you could collect your thoughts, the lunch bell rang and students filed out to their homeroom's and handing in their assignments on their way out. Most of the girls shot you dirty looks before heading out as a way of showing their contempt towards you before the smiled at Mr.Rengoku who was collecting papers at the doorway. At this point, you literally couldn't blame them. Their teacher was a total hottie and you were practically stealing him right under their noses.

As the last student handed in their assignment, Mr. Rengoku closed the door behind them and approached his desk to set aside the stack of papers. He pulled put a box of tissues, picking one out and sneezed rather loudly into it. Cheeks were now a hue of vermillion and he slighted groaned while holding his head.

"You don't look so good, Mr. Renguko." You stated worriedly.

He waved you off. "Nonsense, I'm fine. And you can drop the formalities when were not in front of students. Call me Kyojuro."

You sighed as you fumbled through your bag handing him some cold and flu pills and a packet of vitamin c. "Ok, Kyojuro. You can call me [first name], but I'm going to need you to take these for me and get on home."

He blew loudly into his tissue before tossing into the trash revealing his very red nose. "I-I'm fine, Miss [last name]-- I mean [first name]. Really, I'm ok." He stuttered as he tried to collect himself and get up. Unfortunately, he couldn't hold himself up for more than ten seconds before collapsing and luckily you were there to catch him. He seemed to have been mumbled incoherent words as he laid heavily in your arms. You sighed as you slowly laid him down on the ground and reached for your cellphone to dial the one person you knew could handle this situation the best.

"You didn't actually burn the place down did you?"

You rolled your eyes. "No, idiot. Teacher down."

"Ah, fuck."

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mooniefics · 3 years

Text

— beck and call

pairings : yelena / fem reader

word count : 10.2k

tags : one-sided relationship, lowkey master / servant dynamic, eventual smut, mild body worship, dom / sub undertones, power imbalance

warnings : contains nsfw, mildly dub-con at some points, yelena being physically rough w you for disobedience

summary : serving as yelena's personal guard turned out to yield many unexpected consequences.

to say that you were unnerved by the task of guarding an anti-marleyan volunteer would be an understatement.

you hadn't quite digested the fact there even existed a world beyond the walls that had towered over you for your entire life, looming high in the sky like a reminder that you would be trapped, penned like an animal for the rest of your prospective future. that had been your initial motivation to become a soldier, to at least advance to a garrison position where you could have a taste of exclusive information regarding what lay beyond the stone and metal bearings. but in the final year of your basic training, everything had changed. there were talks of outlandish things, of traitors from another land that had hidden amongst the native people, talks of islands and foreign soil and something more than the confines of the walls.

upon graduating, you had ultimately chosen the scouting legion, seeing how the garrison was quickly being disbanded and the remaining soldiers that hadn't stepped into their early days of retirement were joining the aforementioned regiment. the benefits only seemed to become greater and greater with the extinction of titans, the whispers of allies and retribution and rebuilding a lost legacy of your people. but somehow, all that novel luster had become muted, completely darkened by the imposing presence of this singular individual seated before you. you had only been debriefed on their name and role in military operations before your assignment, leaving you worryingly unprepared for arguably the most important assignment of your career.

the sound of your name passing from your squad leader's lips grounded you, the formal introduction quickly drawing to a close as he relayed the information to the striking foreigner. "she will be your personal escort for the remainder of your stay. if you have any questions regarding the island, feel free to ask her at any time."

"wonderful." their voice was rich, smooth with confidence and underlined with something unfamiliar—it was the way their lips rounded out the first syllable, or perhaps the way they spoke from the depths of their throat.

you felt your back stiffen as they rose from their seat, somehow rising taller and taller, their stature reaching much higher than anyone you'd ever met. immediately, your right hand clamped into a fist, thudding over your heart as your left arm hooked behind your back, spitting out your full name and designation just as you had while saluting hundreds of times. "i'm incredibly grateful for this opportunity to occupy you. thank you for all that you and the volunteers have done for paradis."

you were shocked that your voice hadn't quivered with the way their eyes dragged down your body, grey and barren of any emotion besides a hint of intrigue, sharp features framed by short, fair hair. they were strikingly handsome, masculine yet feminine at the same time, an indiscernible sort of beauty that perplexed and enthralled you.

"no need to thank me, soldier." whether they were assuring or commanding you, you didn't know, only cognizant of how they nearly purred out your title. swallowing, you lowered your hands, standing at ease and forcing yourself to not look to your superior for encouragement.

"then i shall show you to your lodgings. please follow me."

you forced yourself to turn your back to them and take a step, then another, mentally counting them one by one until you reached the door. you could hear their heavy footfalls following behind you, the distance steadily beginning to close until you forced your own pace to quicken. on the silent walk out of the management building, you had found a speed that worked, one long stride of theirs equaling two of yours, leaving you straining to keep a comfortable yet polite space between the both of you. you risked a glance back, having to crane your head up to catch a glimpse of their face. they had been staring idly at the back of your head, meeting your eyes when you turned to briefly face them, the moment cut short by your own haste to fix your view back onto the path before you.

"how shall i address you?" you attempted to fill the cool void of discomfort that had suddenly settled in the air around you, shoulders tense and brow taut.

"anything works."

their answer offered nothing in return to your inquiry, the faint image of their face flitting across your mind. you hadn't looked at them long enough to commit their features to memory, but you had looked enough to remember their startlingly cold eyes, angular nose and full lips, sharp jaw and heavy brow.

"m-miss yelena?" you attempted, fighting the urge to nervously fidget or give away any sign of your unease.

"if it suits you." was their final reply before the two of you fell silent once again.

the lack of discussion persisted through the remainder of the journey, the only sounds occupying the space being the fall of your boots against the ground and the jingle of your keyring that you drew from your pocket to unlock the front door. you stood aside to hold it open as she walked in, feeling an odd sensation flutter in the pit of your stomach when she had to duck under the frame to enter. the housing itself wasn't extravagant, only a single open room with a desk, bookshelf, dresser, kitchenette, bed, and a small bathroom area to the side to occupy the space, the ceiling seeming much lower than it was due to yelena's formidable height. she looked out at the room, flicking a stray lock of hair out of her eyes, face neutral and inexpressive.

"how quaint," she turned to face you, a prick of unease making your posture pin-straight once again, "is there any reason they've put us volunteers away from the main soldier barracks?"

your mind suddenly went blank at the worst of times, unknowing of the exact answer but knowing you had to over something in response. "s-simply for your comfort. we wouldn't like it to seem as if we don't trust you to stay on your own."

"ah, so considerate of you." for the first time she smiled, a barely-there tilt at the corner of her lips that made your heart stutter, "then i'll be sure to make myself at home."

she stepped slowly over to the bookshelf, dragging her fingers over the backs of the books with an apparent interest. you stayed standing where you were, unsure if you should leave then or wait a bit longer for just the right moment. something about her presence was unnerving, but there was also an undeniable allure that you almost gravitated to, despite her being a stranger.

"do you need anything else?" you piped up, letting your hands link behind your back, fingers twisting together.

"not that i can think of." each word seemed scripted, as if she'd practiced this entire conversation a dozen times before it'd ever happened.

"then i'll be on my way." you shakily smiled in an attempt to seem put together, hoping that she didn't immediately see through the weak front, "i'll be back in a couple of hours to escort you to dinner."

you bowed and took your leave, almost desperate to escape her all-consuming gaze and find refuge outside her line of sight. but even after you'd shut the door behind you and stepped off the porch, well on your way down the path you'd taken, you could still feel how her eyes had examined every fine detail of your stance, analyzing every shift and subtle movement you made with a calculating look. deep down, you already knew that this position would be completely exhausting from the get-go.

─── · 。ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

you had fulfilled your typical nightly routine—fetch yelena from her quarters to escort her to the cafeteria, go your separate ways and sit at your usual tables after getting food, finish your dinner with five minutes to spare in the dining hour to go inform yelena that it was time for her to wrap up her meal so you could take her back. she'd followed you down the usual path, now lit with newly placed street lamps that turned on after the sun sunk below the horizon and night fell. there had been nothing out of the ordinary, aside from the way the volunteer table had eyed you with a formerly absent intrigue when you came to speak to yelena.

that comfortable distance you'd kept between the two of you had slowly been narrowing over the last few days, a development which had peaked both your curiosity and your anxiety. while you still kept yourself a few paces ahead of her, you could feel how close her presence had become, an almost physical weight that settled itself over your back and urged you to walk faster and faster to escape its grasp. but you knew that she was all too good at reading your body language, somehow having familiarized herself with even the finest idiosyncrasies that incriminated you in just about a month, an understanding that had only grown deeper as more and more time had passed. although you felt as if you'd gained the upper hand for a few days when you realized that she always let a bit of emotion slip in her large, ashen eyes when you said something just enough out of the ordinary to catch her interest, any progress you thought you'd made was quickly squandered by her own advancements. today was no different, another morning and afternoon filled with dodging the occasional pervasive question from her about the simplest of things.

were you an only child? had you been closer to your mother or father when you were younger? did you join the scouts to explore the world or because you simply found no value in living out your life doing something different? they had started out with an ambiguous end-goal, but slowly evolved into even more unprofessional matters—attempts to provoke a discussion about your love life, what you might look for in a prospective partner, whether you wanted to settle down after you retired or stay unattached for the remainder of your life.

you always dodged, and she always let up for a while, lulling you into a sense of safety that was always broken by that same question again, worded differently but asking for an answer that was the same as the last. the more you ran from her company, the more she seemed to push it upon you, pleased when you would slip up and get flustered when she caught you off guard. so you held your ground this evening, even when your fingers quivered at the realization that she was practically peering over your shoulder, watching you unlock the door to her quarters with just barely enough space separating you to not feel her breath fanning down the back of your neck.

you quickly opened the door and began moving to hold it open for her like you always did, but felt a large hand resting at your shoulder, prompting you to quickly spin on your heel to face her. she was usually finished with her casual interrogating by this hour, which was why you were more than surprised to see that she was staring down at you, having lowered yourself to your level enough for you to not have to tilt your head completely back to meet her eye.

you took an instinctive step back, flinching at the sound of the door falling shut behind you, effectively caging you in between it and the woman before you. pale, dangerously alert irises traversed your expression, drinking in every small feature that had been drawn back into a confused look, stomach already knotting into a twisted tangle of warmth and icy panic.

"are you afraid of me?"

the immediate answer sat on the tip of your tongue, lips parting to deliver the lie you had ready for such an inquiry. but something in her eyes spoke to you, silently, warning you not to give into dishonesty. you couldn't possibly admit to still being fearful of her, not when you were meant to be the powerful one in this relationship. you weren't supposed to say yes, but you also found yourself unable to lie as you always did, not when the path you'd walked with her was still worryingly empty and you felt the hard wood of the door now pressing unforgivingly into your back with each minuscule step back.

"sh-should i be?" you cursed your stammer, betraying your evident lack of control, the only redeeming aspect being the non-committal implication that responding with another question held.

that seemed to throw her off a bit, owlish eyes slowly blinking at you as she thought. even up close like this, you couldn't identify a single flaw in her appearance—pale skin smooth like porcelain, unconcerned by any sort of natural imperfections, hair like fine silk and eyes piercingly bright, yet clouded like a stormy sky. you squeaked at a hand seizing your collar, right hand instinctively flying down to the scabbard strapped around your thigh, clammy palm shakily clenching around the hilt of your blade, the other clamping firmly around her wrist.

she only smirked at the presumed threat, pressing herself even closer to you, enough that you could feel the radiant heat of her lips just barely grazing your own. you suppressed the trembling threatening to shake through your every limb, beginning to feel lightheaded with the effort to contain your quickening breaths, swallowing down your dread, forcing yourself to meet her gaze when she spoke.

"if it suits you. it doesn't affect me either way, does it?"

you just barely shook your head side to side, not realizing you were rising up onto your tiptoes until she pulled you forward that last inch by your shirt, eyes falling shut as her lips melded easily against yours. an inexplicable warmth flourished in your chest, heart tripping up to match the frantic speed of your thoughts, fingers clenching around her slender, clothed wrist. you forced yourself back with a sharp intake of breath, backing yourself far enough into the door that you could feel the wood digging into the small of your back.

"m-miss yelena, you can't—!"

she didn't allow you to finish, tugging you back to your previous position with a low huff, the faint snap of a stitch popping somewhere on your collar going unregarded as you let out a small noise of surprise, wide eyes relenting and squeezing shut. a voice in the back of your mind screamed for you to draw your knife, push her away, force her into her quarters, anything but just standing there and allowing her to exert such a humiliating power over you. but it was so much easier to sink into her grasp, to feel her fingers slowly relax and hold you at a comfortable height rather than force you up, to allow the hot flush of an unknown intimacy to settle deep into your skin.

you'd been kissed before, it wasn't as if she stole your first chance from you, but it had never been like this. you had only brushed the surface of gentle pecks and lingering hands on the other's face until you both giggled and pulled away, never faced with such a certain confidence that almost frightened you more than it allured you, an unspoken order that left you at her mercy rather than on equal footing. and though you'd all but forgotten about your initial rejection, yelena had not, chastising you with a firm bite to your lower lip that drew a less-than-composed whimper from the back of your throat.

"i would advise you to not dictate what i can and cannot do in the future." she stated firmly, tone devoid of any personal inflection, barely pulling away enough for you to meet her stare, hand tightening around your collar once more, "understood?"

"y-yes, miss yelena." you barely whispered, nodding affirmatively. a flicker of amusement momentarily lightened her expression when you drew your tongue over the aching skin of your lips, the taste of faint copper and black tea clinging to your taste buds.

she slowly slackened her grip, not even so much as blinking as she straightened her posture and reached past you to open the door, allowing you a moment to scamper out of her path and pull your shirt back into place with trembling hands. "then, you are dismissed, soldier."

she didn't spare you a second glance before proceeding into her quarters, shutting the door behind her without another word. you stood dumbly for a moment, licking over your bottom lip once more, just then realizing how shallow and quick your breathing was. you steadied yourself enough to lock her door, shaking away the mental fog of such an abrupt change of scenery, pulling your jacket tighter around you to make up for the lack of her warmth pressing into you, confused as to why you had just allowed yourself to be ordered around by the individual that you were meant to be keeping in check. the walk back to your dorm was blurry at best, a few good-nights from your colleagues that prompted a hum of acknowledgement, thankfully nothing that required you to recount your daily fulfilled duties or anything past a few minutes prior.

even after you'd shed your clothes, pointedly ignoring how wrinkled your shirt front had become, cleaned yourself up and crawled into the isolated comfort of your bed, you found yourself unable to sleep. perhaps you could learn from this experience, remind yourself at all times to put even more distance between the two of you. maybe you would have to stop conversing with her so casually, or perhaps your best option would be to cut your losses and request an assignment change, consequences or record mark-ups be damned. but as you tossed and turned on your mattress, burying your face into your pillows and trying to rid your skin of any memory of her touch, a voice at the back of your head ceaselessly murmured, a rambled premonition of more turbulence to come.

─── · 。ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

this day marked five weeks since the initial incident, there had been no activity like it since—although you couldn't say whether you thought that was a bad thing or not. not to say that you hadn't been keeping your distance, the first few days were spent cautiously looking over your shoulder, making sure to keep her even further than arm's length but still close enough to guarantee that she couldn't slip away on her own. she behaved respectfully enough, although she herself seemed to be acting as if nothing had even happened, greeting you like normal and allowing you to escort her to meals and strategy meetings when necessary, despite how she'd affirmed that you weren't to give her any orders.

you hadn't reported the infraction to any superiors, knowing that you would get caught up in an unnecessary fuss that might even get you stuck at the bottom of the ranking list once again, an unthinkable outcome that only made you sure that the right decision was to keep your mouth shut. the previous afternoon was the first time yelena had made a special request, describing how unfortunate it was that she was lacking just a few proper amenities that would really make her lodgings "feel just like home". your persistent hesitance had eased after the first week of safety, and you fulfilled your responsibility of maintaining her comfort by arriving early this morning, toting a small bag of a dark ground powder and cups.

you were surprised to see that yelena was already awake upon your arrival, seated at a table that looked far too small for her, reading one of the many books from her provided bookshelf. you exchanged polite greetings, her not rising from her place until you'd lit the fire beneath the stove and set out a plate and cup for her at the counter, stowing away the rest in whatever free space you could find. you stood by while she took care of making whatever it was she wanted herself, noting the fragrant richness that had filled the air upon her steeping the powder in heated water.

"they only serve black tea in the cafeteria," she said, speaking to no one in particular, plucking a ladle from the utensil rack, "it's been ages since i had a cup of coffee in the morning."

the heat of the stove was beginning to warm the room, prompting you to shed your jacket and place it on the back of the chair yelena had not been previously seated at. your shirt beneath it was more forgiving, a thin material that had always hung a bit loosely from your shoulders, great for the hotter days when you were still expected to be in uniform.

"have you ever had a cup of coffee?" her voice interrupted your meandering stream of thought, the sound of liquid being poured into a cup faintly catching your attention.

"no, i don't think i have."

"would you like to try some?"

the offer stoked the spark of bothersome curiosity, the scent filling the air and mingling with the ambient sound of crackling wood and the feel of the hot air making you want to accept. perhaps this was her way of making amends, or just doing something pleasant for the worker that she was made to follow behind like their second shadow.

"if it's not too much trouble, then.."

"of course it isn't."

you felt a light sweat beginning to bead down your back, pulling your handkerchief from your pocket and dabbing at your neck. this space wasn't properly suited for a stove to be used, seeing as the unlatching mechanisms on the window had been removed for the sake of thwarting any sort of curfew breaking by the volunteers, meaning there was little ventilation aside from the small chimney extending out of the kitchenette area. you stole a glance at yelena, now opening the cabinet that you had strained to reach with ease.

the memory of her hand fisting your shirt, the collar that now hugged just the slightest bit looser at the base of your neck, the long healed-over bite that had left the soft flesh of your lips feeling raw for the following few days. the external heat of the still burning stove was only intensified by the flush climbing up to your cheeks, the desire to release a button or two on your shirt and free some of your skin to the open air becoming undeniable. it felt a bit ironic that the one time you'd properly stepped into her quarters for more than a quick minute to help her get something sorted was the one time the tension that always hung in the air between the two of you was replaced by something tangibly suffocating, the sweltering heat that made you kick off your blankets in the dreary silence at night when the recollection of her kiss relentlessly looped in your mind and chased away any thought of sleep.

you hooked a finger on the collar of your shirt, gently tugging it to the side to absentmindedly press the soft cloth over the skin, wiping away any bothersome perspiration that would leave you uncomfortable by the time you were allowed to change out of your uniform and shower it away.

"what's that?" your eyes darted up at her question, catching sight of the two plated teacups in her hands before you met her gaze.

"i beg your pardon?" you asked meekly.

"that. at your shoulder." you glanced down to where your handkerchief had previously been.

"oh, do you mean this?" she nodded when you pointed to the raised line of skin marring your shoulder, a thick scar that you'd stopped fussing over after realizing that it was an inevitable outcome. "it's a scar," you clarified, tucking your personal cloth back in your pocket, "just about everyone in the military has the same one."

she didn't respond, but held your gaze as she proceeded to the table to set the cups down. you'd become more accustomed to these silent requests, and you knew that she was telling you to continue.

"you work with the equipment engineers, right?" she nodded. "then you've seen our harnesses. all those leather straps end up digging into our skin and leaving scars pretty much all over. although, i did practice on the omnidirectional gear a bit more than all the other recruits during basic training to increase my proficiency, so mine may be deeper.."

you tensed as she approached, slow, deliberate steps steadily closing the distance between the two of you until she was right in front of you. she had started stooping down more often around you, only when she was directly addressing you alone, but it was something that you noticed all the same. a part of you wanted to feel offended, that she thought it necessary to lower yourself to your level as if you were beneath her in a way besides physical stature, but you couldn't deny that you enjoyed the exclusive treatment. she never seemed concerned with doing any sort of thing with anyone else—not with her colleagues, not with other soldiers of or below your ranking, not with any of your own superiors, only you. in a way, it made you feel acknowledged.

"could i see?"

"huh?" was your unprofessional response, but she didn't allow you any time to correct it.

"your scars. where else do you have them?"

"oh." you swallowed, forcing yourself to look up into her steely eyes, "well, i have them on the soles of my feet, and around my thighs, mostly around my torso."

a hand on your abdomen made your back go stiff, her touch pressing lightly over your shirt. "here?"

you nodded, small and timid before her, a trickle of sweat beginning to slide down your back. you realized that you had never had to look down at yelena, not until this present moment where she had knelt down on one knee in front of you, holding your gaze for just a moment before she undid a single button from the bottom of your shirt, glancing up at you as if to check for any sign of refusal before she undid another, then another.

there was nothing forceful about her motions today, nimble fingers patiently unfastening each clasp with care until your shirt revealed your midsection. one slender hand pulled aside the cotton fabric, the other reaching out, just barely grazing the skin of your stomach where the long, pale scar from your utility belt stretched horizontally across your body. her fingertips were warm from handling the kitchenware, but the shiver that crawled up your spine was cold, almost electric, a strange sensation squeezing around your heart and lungs, making each breath quicker than the last.

"was it painful?" she asked quietly, a tinge of earnesty lining her words, features entirely relaxed as they always were.

you let out a breath you didn't know you'd been holding, voice barely reaching a whisper. "yes."

she focused her eyes onto the marred skin, following the raised line of flesh to your sides, brow cinching upwards the slightest bit at the sight of another carving down your waist, following the curvature of your ribs.

"what resilience.." she murmured, free hand returning to undo the remaining buttons of your shirt, "determination is such a beautiful trait, don't you think?" her eyes flitted up to meet yours, sharp and observant, fingers gingerly wrapping around your waist, thumb stroking down your lumbar. "for most, i have to hear it in their voice, or through their words—but it has always been different with you." she pulled a button free. "i see it in your eyes, the way you carry yourself, it's written all over your body." another undone button, you could feel the warmth of her breath fanning across your stomach, the graze of her fingertips tracing up your side and halting at the cloth wrappings over your breasts. "are there more under this?"

your knees felt a few flattering words away from buckling, each gentle touch making the fine hairs on the back of your neck stand on end. you nodded, lips parting to take in a much-needed deep breath, realizing that your shirt was now completely open, exposing the entirety of your scarred torso aside from what remained covered by your chest bindings. your fingers curled into your palm, trembling, just then noticing how soft yelena's hands were in comparison to your own, absent of callous and work-roughened skin. you bit at the inside of your cheek, blinking down at her as you watched a thin finger trace the seam of the cloth, finding the tucked end within moments and gently pulling it free.

a few loud knocks at the door were startling enough to make you jump, head snapping to the side to face the front of the house, a muffled call of your last name from the other side making an anxious knot twist painfully tight deep in your gut. you quickly stepped away, leaving yelena kneeling on the floor, struggling to button up your shirt without even bothering to fix your chest cloth. as soon as you'd gotten yourself situated, you opened the door to find your squad leader awaiting you on the other side.

"is everything alright? breakfast started five minutes ago."

you hoped that the disbelief on your face could be taken as the expression of someone who had simply lost track of time. "i apologize, sir! m-miss yelena put in a request for marleyan coffee yesterday, and i was simply waiting for her to finish before i escorted her to the cafeteria."

you forced yourself to stay composed, trying to focus on the impassive face of your squad leader. there was a stark difference between the emotionlessness of yelena and that of everyone else around you, she somehow made her lack of any sort of feeling or warmth a beautiful kind of coldness, unlike the unnatural stoicism of your superiors. you saw his mouth open to reply, but you were both surprised by a sudden presence behind you, a firm hand at your shoulder, his eyes moving from looking down at you to looking up at the woman behind you, a flicker of genuine unease flitted across his hardened features.

"please don't fault her for my lack of punctuality," she said, a false sincerity lightening her usual low tone, "i simply wanted to enjoy a taste of home, is all. is my presence imperative?"

"i was only making sure everyone was accounted for." your squad leader asserted, staring up at her in an obvious attempt to intimidate that you knew would fail, "as long as you're being properly monitored, do as you please."

"understood." her fingers curled around your shoulder, gently urging you back, away from the door, "then i won't dawdle any longer, i'll join you all in the cafeteria momentarily."

yelena shut the door for you as soon as you took a step back, waiting until the steps of your squad leader had descended off of the porch and disappeared down the path before speaking to you. "i do hope i didn't get you in trouble."

you turned on your heel to face her, feeling a slight flutter in your chest at the sight of her already having lowered herself to your height. "oh, no, you don't have to worry about that.. he's always been a bit on the uptight side of things."

the corners of her lips perked up into the faintest smile before she proceeded back to the table, pressing a finger to the side of one of the teacups. "the coffee's gone cold now. my apologies for the distraction."

distraction, the wry thought flitted across your mind. you guessed that word was suitably to describe allowing her to nearly undress you before the sun had even fully risen in the sky. this was becoming a dangerous game, an ever-lengthening round of cat and mouse, and each day that passed made your more and more certain that you were the one who was running despite your inherent position of power over her. there was something absolutely captivating about her, whether it be the air of mystery that no amount of questions could dispel, or the way that she could practically bring you to your knees with just a few careful words—the more thought you put into it, the more instances of appeal that you seemed to find that only made you want to sink deeper and deeper into the depths that was her subtle control over you.

"i just don't want us to arrive late and miss out on anything." you said lamely, empty words to fill the air as you moved across the room to grab your jacket.

"perhaps another time." she replied, removing the dishes from the table to deposit them in the sink, leaving you with that sole promise that insinuated much more than just another cup of coffee.

─── · 。ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

"miss yelena, i don't know if we're allowed to be in this section of the building—"

"no one has stopped us yet, have they?" yelena didn't turn back to address you, only continuing forward with that long stride that took two quick steps of your own to match.

she was correct in the regard that no one had questioned her presence in the west wing of the management building, and the few that had begun to object stopped immediately upon catching sight of you following obediently behind her. you felt a bit like a prop, being used as almost a badge of clearance by the one and only individual that you were meant to keep from unauthorized locations such as this one. but her flat assertion that she had important business that gave you nothing in the way of information of direction before she'd taken off for the barracks, leaving you only able to chase after her and hope that no one figured out that she wasn't supposed to be there in the event that she truly wasn't meant to be.

you didn't have long to ruminate on your circumstances before you arrived at a door flanked by a single soldier, a young man that you recognized as someone affiliated with the more well-known soldiers from the 104th graduating class. though you didn't recall his name, you nodded politely to him as he opened the door for yelena, trailing closely behind her while still trying to peek around her slender frame. it was one of the smaller meeting rooms, a large window providing a fair amount of natural illumination down onto the round table, the sole occupant being another one of the anti-marleyan volunteers.

"glad to see you could make it." onyankopon smiled broadly up at yelena, his warm gaze flitting to you momentarily before traveling back to his associate, "no trouble, i assume?"

"none at all." she replied as she took a seat at the head of the table, looking as if she belonged there more than any of the superiors you'd seen seated there, "this one made sure no one interrupted our trip."

you flushed at the praise, standing pin straight beside her chair, hands lowering from behind your back to at your sides, trying not to let the enjoyment of her commendation show on your face. he turned his attention to you, inspiring a quick skip of your heart, fingers tapping nervously at your thighs.

"it's great to hear that yelena has been treating you well." he said matter-of-factly, but a cocked eyebrow and tilt of his head seemed to request a verbal confirmation of his statement.

you blinked, your words catching in your throat as your eyes involuntarily glanced to yelena, an instinctive desire to hold your tongue in the face of speaking about her, an odd sort of insecurity concerning your character flaring in your chest. but that split second of silence was all that she needed to take up the task of answering onyankopon, planting an elbow down on the tabletop and resting her chin in her palm.

"i have been treating her well." she affirmed, almost sounding bored, tilting her head to address you as she reached out and took the hand of yours that was closest to her, drawing it close to her face as she examined your expression, "isn't that right?"

you swallowed, mouth dry, nodding at yelena before remembering that you were meant to be answering onyankopon. "oh, y-yes. miss yelena has been very easy to work with."

pale eyes glimmered at your positive answer, mouth twitching upwards into that rare, barely noticeable smile. you felt your heart jump into your throat as she brought her lips to your knuckles, planting a soft, brief kiss over the back of your hand before gently placing it down at your side. she looked at you as if she knew exactly what you were thinking, like she could hear that unspoken worry of whether she should be doing this in front of her colleague, like she was giving the silent reply that she could do as she pleased.

"then, shall we begin?" onyankopon's voice brought you back to the present, shooting you another momentary glance before fixing his eyes on yelena.

"oh, right." she turned back to you, "be a dear and leave us for a moment to chat."

the mix of confusion at her request and surprise at the affectionate title halted your thoughts. "i'm sorry, miss yelena, but i don't think i'm allowed to do that."

your heart sank as you watched a look of annoyance draw across her features, large eyes narrowing, brow knitting together. she didn't speak for a moment, almost like she was waiting for you to take back your refusal and head on your way without any further discussion. when you did neither, she frowned, reaching out her hand once more, her fingers drawing up your palm to wrap around your wrist.

you nearly yelped as she clinched her grasp almost painfully tight, thumb pressing down hard over the bone at the side of your wrist, nails digging in your skin. her voice was low when she spoke, dangerously commanding and castigating, each word carefully enunciated.

"i said go."

only after you'd earnestly nodded did she release you, allowing you to scamper out of the room, blinking away the tears that had begun to well in your eyes from your stinging skin and the way she'd spoken to you. you took your place at the side of the door unoccupied by the soldier you'd seen before entering, fingers shakily tracing over the underside of your wrist.

though you weren't bleeding, the skin felt raw and irritated, your pulse racing fast in your veins. perhaps it wasn't so bad that you'd left them in there on their own, seeing as the older, more experienced guard was also standing by, well aware that there was no one monitoring them in the meeting room. so you obediently stood and waited, straining to make out coherent words from their muffled voices, contemplating why seeing yelena upset with you was so distressing.

why had you allowed her to order you around? why had you even complied with her demands instead of outright refusing like you were supposed to? why were you worried that she would still be angry with you by the time she walked out of that meeting room? you couldn’t understand what concerned you so deeply about what yelena thought of you, but somehow, the overbearing silence of the empty hallway made it even more difficult to wrap your head around your thoughts. you were so wrapped up in your panicked attempt at contemplation that you didn’t even notice the sound of their footsteps approaching from the other side of the door, only torn from your mind when the door opened from beside you. the two marleyans emerged, laughing affably together, exchanging temporary farewells until they could see each other at dinner that evening.

you looked up at her anxiously, wishing she’d spare you a glance for even just a moment instead of keeping her gaze fixed on the only other individuals populating the space. you hid your hands behind your back rather than in your pockets, knowing that it’d look horrendously unprofessional. but before you could worry about anyone catching sight of the reddened marks, the familiar soldier addressed you directly.

“i do look forward to working more closely with you in the future, i don’t believe we’ve met before. ” he said, outstretching a hand for you to shake, “floch forster.”

you quickly tugged the sleeve of your coat over your injured wrist, grasping his hand and giving a firm up and down, only offering your own name and a polite nod in return. you didn’t exactly know what he meant by working together in the future, but you assumed that it was in reference to your shared position of personal guards to marleyan volunteers.

you tensed at the familiar weight of a hand on your shoulder, feeling a firm squeeze that you knew all too well. “then we shall be going now. come.”

you immediately complied, giving a brief goodbye to the two men before proceeding quickly behind yelena, practically at her heels as the two of you walked further and further down the hall, shrouded in another bout of tense silence. you escorted her out of the building without issue, through the barracks and all the way to her lodgings, receiving nothing in the way of assurance or acknowledgment the entire way.

you wanted to speak up for yourself, ask if she was angered with you, anything to fill the quiet void, but you couldn't bring your mouth to push the words free. you hoped that she'd at least offer you her usual goodbye, as inherently lifeless and out of polite necessity as it may be, but it didn't come even as you unlocked the door to her quarters and held it open for her to enter, not even turning back before she sat herself at her desk and got to work on the clutter of papers occupying it.

you left her, feeling strangely heavy with defeat, unable to focus on anything for long before your mind strayed back to her upset expression, or the physical evidence of her displeasure with you. over the next hours, you constantly checked your watch, counting down the minutes to dinner, to when you'd be able to justify being in her presence and hopefully receive some sort of indicator that you were in the clear. you'd always been someone who did what was asked of you, a people pleaser—but there was something different about the inclination you felt towards yelena. it wasn't the kind of obedience that you gave to your superiors, she wasn't anything close to your superior in a technical sense, but somehow it felt natural, a servitude borne out of free will rather than one determined by ranking.

you knew you hadn't done anything wrong by denying her initially, but yet you still hoped for her forgiveness.

─── · 。ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

you quivered at the feeling of her lips sucking at the already marked skin of your neck, thighs squeezing tighter around her waist, her nails digging deep enough into them that they nearly threatened to tear the fabric of your pants. you swallowed down yet another moan, one hand working its way deeper into her short hair, the other clenching tightly to the fabric of her barely-buttoned dress shirt. your soft, shuddering breaths filled the space of the open air around you, the fear of knowing your squad leader was just outside the door waiting for a reply, adjacent to the wall that she'd pushed you up against despite your meek warnings that dinner would be starting any minute now, was almost tangible in your stomach.

she pulled away from the reddened flesh with a low hum, nipping at your ear as she demanded, "make him go away."

you barely nodded, eyes screwing shut when she began yet another bruising assault to your shoulder, not even giving you enough time to collect yourself and speak. "i apologize, s-sir. miss yelena wasn't f-feeling well, so i brought her meal h-h-here instead of escorting her to the cafeteria..!"

you nearly whimpered as her teeth sank into the soft junction between your neck and shoulder, silently praying to any higher power that may be listening for your superior to just leave already. "understood. please return the plates to the cafeteria before they close up and make it to the dormitories before curfew."

"y-yes, sir..!"

you could barely count his descending steps down the porch over the sound of your own blood roaring in your ears, only completely assured of his absence when she sighed against your skin, soothing the ache with a few apologetic licks, pressing her lips everywhere they could reach. you often found yourself recalling the first time this had happened, when the two of you were sitting at the table in her quarters and she had been apologizing for the day she'd ordered you out of the meeting room. you could still remember how her touch had trailed from stroking at your wrist, crescent nail prints still occupying your skin, to cupping your face, drawing you close to kiss her again and again—the heat of her proximity, how her hands had felt and caressed every inch of your body, whispering a breathless, endless stream of praises into your ear as you came apart under her.

though you had vowed to yourself that wouldn't allow it to happen again, that that night would be your first and only instance of giving into that weakness she'd slowly but surely carved into you, but you found yourself sinking into her arms when she beckoned you, sewing the buttons of your shirt back into place without complaint after the nights where she had become impatient and accidentally popped them free, staring at your naked body in the mirror after your long showers and tracing your fingers over the bruises she'd sucked and bitten into your tender skin.

she only marked you in places where you could hide them beneath your clothes, places which assured that she would be the sole individual to see them when she stripped you bare, only to add more and more. there was no set time between those late evenings, sometimes the interval would be less than a few days, and other times it would stretch out for weeks with no indication as to when the next occasion would come. but when it did, any semblance of self-restraint had completely diminished.

"you're such a good pet for me.." she cooed, her words sending a warm spark through every inch of you.

she'd become fond of calling you that, and a part of you wondered if that was all she saw you as, as only a pet or a possession. you'd accepted that she had the upper hand in this relationship, whatever it may be, but you couldn't help enjoying the feeling of being desired so deeply, being touched and admired in ways you'd never even imagined before you met her. your arms clasped tighter around her neck as she pulled you away from the wall, laying you out on her bed, taking a moment to strip out of her shirt before lowering herself on top of you.

her hands busied themselves ridding you of your chest wrappings, lips attentively traversing each inch of newly revealed skin, murmuring curses and sweet nothings that only made you squirm more beneath her, impatient and eager. you mewled when she'd finally settled her hands over her bare breast, large palms pressing into soft flesh, slender fingers pinching at your nipples. she turned her head up to kiss you, tongue outlining the seam of your lips before sliding into your mouth, claiming it as her own.

you were left panting when she pulled away despite its briefness, hazy, low-lidded eyes finding her own, intoxicated by that carnal look, dark pupils nearly overtaking the piercing grey of her irises. she only smirked at your lack of composure, dipping her head back down to suck and bite at the valley of your breasts, your fingers reflexively tightening in her hair. your hips bucked up into nothing, desperate for any sort of friction, much to yelena's amusement.

"aren't you just the neediest little thing?" she paused to lave her tongue over a pert bud, drawing another heated sigh from you as you nodded, hoping that your agreement could persuade her to not spend so much time teasing you.

she granted you the slightest relief, taking your nipple between your lips and sucking at it, the hand not occupied with another breast trailing down the scar etched into your side, following the path down to your navel to begin unbuttoning your pants. each second seemed to drag on longer than the last, and though you knew that she wasn't purposely drawing out the process of undressing you, it was still not enough. you were practically kicking your underwear to the floor by the time they made their way around your ankles, skin still burning hot despite being fully exposed to the air.

"p-please, miss yelena.." you whimpered at the feeling of her hand tracing up and down your inner thigh, occasionally stopping to stroke across the raised lines of skin that had been inscribed into your skin by the series of belts and buckles on your gear harness, but never proceeding that final inch up to where you needed it.

she pulled away to let out a low chuckle, peering up at you through dark lashes, bare chest pressed flush against your stomach. she drank in the way your face shifted as she rested the pad of her thumb over your clit, rubbing languid circles over it as her pointer finger dipped down your cunt, instantly slick with your arousal.

"you're so worked up from just that?" she taunted, speaking at barely a murmur, "or was it because somebody was listening?"

you felt the knot of anticipation drawing tight in the pit of your stomach, watching as she took her fingers in her mouth and licked over them, thighs shuddering when she returned to their previous position. "i-it was— i j-just— please.."

you could barely form a coherent thought, back arching up to urge your body as close to hers as you could manage, only cognizant of just how close you were to being relieved of that unbearable pressure welling within you. she only smiled, close-lipped and cunning, resting her head over your heaving chest.

"your heart is racing. i wonder how much faster i could make it go.."

you nearly whined as two fingers slid into you with little resistance, her mouth closing over a nipple, alternating between gently tugging at it with her teeth and flicking over it with the tip of her tongue. your hips rocked up into her hand, matching the pace of her wrist as your head dug back into the mattress, moans and incoherent pleas spilling from your parted lips.

you could feel yourself quickly approaching that rapturous peak, hands fisting the sheets under you, white stars blotting out your vision as she curled her fingers just right. you shuddered, gasping, eyes rolling aimlessly into the back of your head as the tension that had wound itself into every muscle finally released, coming completely undone beneath her. you pressed a shaking hand over your mouth, muffling the sound of your winded breaths, letting out a small noise when she relieved you of her fingers. you felt her lips grazing over your chest, forcing your head up to look at her with bleary eyes when their feather-light touch proceeded lower and lower down your stomach.

you had expected things to come to an end as they usually did, with her pulling her clothes back on before you even had the chance to see straight and gathering your own garments from the floor to hand to you, leaving you to walk back to your dormitories on trembling legs in your wrinkled uniform. but there was no sign of that immediate withdrawal as she gathered your thighs in her hands, lifting your legs up onto her shoulders as she pressed a brief kiss over your naval.

you licked your lips nervously, already more than too sensitive at just the feeling of her breath over your soaked cunt. you opened your mouth to meekly object or ask for just a moment longer to catch your breath, but she shushed you, her heavy-lidded gaze sending a fresh bout of heat across your skin. each little quiver of your thighs only made her grip fasten, unable to keep still as she kissed at the scars and soft flesh, drawing a stifled whimper when she stopped to suck a deep mark at a spot of untarnished skin.

you could see the pale expanse of yelena's back, pristine and absent of any previous traumas, the complete opposite of your own. the first time you'd see her undressed, you couldn't take your eyes off of her slender frame, lined with muscle from her days as a soldier but still so delicate. you'd never left any marks when she'd allow you to kiss at her neck and chest, only enough to see the rosy flush settle over her body, but by that time she was more than eager to get back to playing with you instead.

you took in a deep, unsteady breath, jaw clenching and stomach tightening as her tongue drew flat up the length of your cunt, a small moan breaking from your parted lips. she pressed forward, flicking the tip of her tongue over your clit in a merciless rhythm, holding your thighs apart to accommodate her presence each time they attempted to squeeze shut. you writhed over the sheets, her name slipping from you between high-pitched whines and labored breaths, minutes melting past in an incomprehensible blur, leaving you only cognizant of her tongue and hands dragging you back over that edge again and again.

by the time she'd released you, you could barely hold your eyes open, thighs aching from her fingers digging into them, throat raw from crying out for her and gasping in what never seemed to be enough air, feeling too exhausted to even think about making the walk back to your own room. but rather than hand your clothes to you in a silent cue for your departure, you watched her make her way back up the mattress to lay beside you, pulling your heavy, sweat-slicked body against her own. you couldn't try to refuse the comfort of her warmth, face pressing into her chest, breathing in her soft, clean scent, still occasionally trembling as you tentatively allowed your hands to cling to her.

you told yourself not to get comfortable, to try to regain control of your limbs by the time her sympathy for overworking you had worn off and she ordered you away for the night, but the demand never came. you felt a large hand settle at the base of your neck, another splaying across the small of your back, her chin resting on the crown of your head, holding you close like a lover would.

"you could stay for the night if you'd like." her tone was even and collected as it always was, but hushed, like she was murmuring a secret to you.

you knew that sleeping her had already far overstepped whatever boundary had been abandoned that night she'd first kissed you, the morning where she'd marveled at your body and commended your courage, every instance you'd obeyed her rather than carry out the simple orders you were given. it was already too late to tear yourself away from this presence that you'd grown so familiar with—the one that you had feared, the one that you now craved despite how you knew you shouldn't.

"thank you, miss yelena." you whispered hoarsely, curling into her, allowing your heavy eyes to close.

that would be the first and last time you ever spent the night in her quarters.

─── · 。ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

the banquet to celebrate the completion of the rail system in trost was minutes away from commencing. the speaking podium was empty for the moment, soldiers and civilians chattering amongst themselves as they waited for the military officials to gather at the stage. you were authorized to be in the private area as yelena's personal escort, seeing as she had participated in the mapping of the railroad through the district and would be acknowledged as a contributor to the advancement of paradis.

but as excited as you were to celebrate, eat good food and hopefully get a chance to drink, you weren't looking forward to transferring your position to floch forster for the remainder of the night. although, your desire to stay by yelena's side had been momentarily dissuaded by the desire to please her when she'd requested the change a few days prior. you hadn't bothered to hide your disappointment, nor did you hold back your questions.

"change to forster? but.. why?" you had asked, in the privacy of her quarters, feeling an immediate disheartening at her words.

she didn't directly respond, the hand that had been at your shoulder rising to pet at your cheek. "you trust me, don't you?"

"y-yes, but—"

"then file a request to change with him."

you couldn't explain why you had felt such a cool emptiness burrowing into your chest, a sudden spite for the other soldier beginning to fester in the back of your mind, the thought that she would choose him over you inspiring an indescribable irateness. you turned away from her hand, not thinking of how you were pouting like a child, unwilling to meet her eyes or compromise with her. you'd been fretting over how she hadn't spared you any sort of affection in the nearly two months that had passed, the fear that she'd grown tired of you an incessant whisper in your ear. but then she had reached for you, treated you gently, persuading with that hint of sincerity she rarely ever showed you.

"it would only be for the evening, i have business to attend to that night. i'm sure you've been looking forward to the celebration?" a frown tugged at your lips, only offering a small nod in reply, meeting her eyes when she guided you by your chin to face her. "then transfer with forster, have fun for the evening—you deserve it."

you couldn't help but preen under her praise, meeting her eyes, heart stuttering at the sight of her barely-there smile. you finally caved after a moment of thought, relenting to her wishes. "i'll put in a temporary transfer request tomorrow afternoon."

"thank you, dear."

despite how you weren't exactly looking forward to forster's arrival to relieve you from duty, those final words lifted your spirits just the slightest bit. perhaps she had simply been caught up in the stress of such a grand achievement, too busy attending meetings with engineers and generals and event staff to make any spare time for you for the past weeks. you had waited for weeks before, you could continue waiting if need be. you were at her beck and call, and as long as it pleased her, you were perfectly fine doing as such.

you let out a soft sigh at the sigh of floch forster approaching, weaving through the scattered crowd with a stoic, dutiful look plastered across his expression.

"good evening, floch." yelena said from beside you.

he replied with a polite good evening to both you and her, adding your name as more of an afterthought than anything, but turning his focus back to you when you still hadn't stepped away. "you can go, i'll take it from here."

your gaze flickered over to yelena, feeling yourself relax as she nodded to you, a hand resting at your shoulder to gently urge you forward. "i'll see you tomorrow morning. enjoy yourself tonight."

so you took your leave, watching the ceremony in the company of your fellow soldiers, eyes always wandering away from the speaker and to yelena at the side of the stage. the speech concluded, the crowd cheered and applauded, and everyone was directed to the banquet hall where the remainder of the event would be held. you watched yelena and floch walk off the stage with the other officials, becoming distracted for just a moment speaking to someone but having lost sight of them by the time you looked back.

you didn't see yelena for the remainder of the night, but you did as you were told, enjoying the good food, talking to your friends, avoiding any alcohol in preparation for your usual early morning. it was all over quite quickly, and the next morning came and went, business as usual for the remainder of the next few days—then came the news of eren jaeger's disappearance, then the plans of the all-hands-on-deck operation that was to be the retrieval effort for the young man, the entire scouting branch thrown into overdrive.

and, though you never mustered the courage to ask, you felt a sinking feeling deep inside, that yelena's nightly errand with floch and eren's absence were somehow connected, that there was much more going behind the scenes that you couldn't even begin to fathom.

just wanted to give u guys a little gift for my birthday (´･ᴗ･ ` )

#yelena #snk yelena #yelena x reader #yelena x reader smut #aot x reader #snk x reader #snk x y/n #snk x you #aot x you #aot x reader smut #snk x reader smut #yelena brainrot #shingeki no kyoujin x reader #shingeki no kyojin fanfiction

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all-about-seggs · 3 years

Text

┗ Love- Lies- Bleeding

Pairing - Geto Suguru x Virgin!reader

Word count- 4.8 K

Warnings - Gaslighting, Corruption kink, snuff (not graphically depicted) and then reincarnation, cunnilingus, fingering, unprotected vaginal sex, adding blasphemy kink just to be safe.

A/n- Geto isn't a yandere here but it's Villan! Geto we're talking about so I think his actions are pretty in line with his current canon! Personality. Though a bit delusional. This is by FAR the longest thing I've ever written.

The gray cobblestones stretching across the shrine clicked against your thick wodden sandles, the quaintness of the place only making it seem unnaturally loud. It's was a regular autumn morning, which soon turned into noon as you felt the bright sun shining right on top of your head.

Having finished your morning tasks you were returning to the main shrine where the senior priestess would give you further things to do. Just the thought of more work non stop made you sigh at your monotonous shrine maiden lifestyle but as you lamented you heard footsteps behind you, the sound of which same as that of your own.

"Hey!.....", You turned around to see your little sister huffing as she catches up to you,

" y/n! He's here again!," The implications of her words made your face heat up, sure you were still a bit green and naive, but you made sure to discreet when it came to 'looking' at that one particular man that always seem to stand out among the hoards of faceless people you saw visiting the shrine everyday.

"How many times have I told you not to phrase it like that! You'll get me in trouble with the priestess!", Scrambling to get yourself together you retort sharply.

"Oh come on! Youre the one who used to stare at him from a distance like a lovesick teenager! Atleast now you're talking to him like a normal person", In terms of liveliness the sound of your back and forth was the only thing the place had.

"Watch it! If someone hears you we'll both get scolded", gently warning her again you find yourself turning back to where she came from. The other part of the premises where the peculiar man would be standing, as usual, in all his serene beauty, on the brigde overlooking the small lake.

A man in traditional Japanese cloths that you rarely see anyone wearing these days came to your shrine everyday, without fail for the past month. Everything from his attire to his elegant long hair left you in a trance and your eyes would naturally follow him.

Something about the fact how he'd always come here but never to pray or wish striked you as odd so at first you just observed and even before completely wrapping the situation around your head you two started sharing numerous conversations of the huge world that was right outside but so far away from your reach, his words fuelled the budding curiosity in your heart, the vastness of which made your trips to the lake, the most refreshing part of your otherwise monotonous daily routine.

Even if all you did was talk, a 'supposidly' demure maiden working in a shrine, skipping on her duties and rushing to the other side of the ginormous area to see a man felt almost elicit, scary even when you consider the consequences that would come if you were to get found out. The charisma his every action held was beyond resistance and you soon found yourself enraptured by the male despite everything.

"This is so pointless" you huffed, smiling out of self pity to hide the more frustrating emotions twirling within you.

"Yet you do it everyday", with a small nudge from her elbow you made your way straight to the lake, forgetting about your obligations as a shrine maiden, the responsibilities, the restrictions and all inhibitions put upon you in the name of god.

With quick steps you soon found yourself at the base of the curved brigde,

"Good afternoon Mr. Geto", your greeting came out in a rush, trying to ignore the warmth of your face, but your attempts at hiding your flustered state didn't go unnoticed by the man in front of you.

" Seems like you've been having quite a hectic day", smiling in his usual serene way Geto gracefully turns his head in your direction.

" Not any more than usual", calming your erratic heartbeat you slowly close the distance between the two of you and stand beside him on the arch of the bridge.

" It's really nice here", He remarked, his eyes sweeping across the tiny fishes swimming near the surface of the lake. You stared at him for a little while before finally asking the one thing that drew you to him the most.

" I always wondered, why do you come here everyday if you don't even want to go to the main shrine to pray?. Surely it's not just for this scenery."

" Hmmm? Pray for what?", Not particularly moved by your question he quizzically tilt his head.

"Well.....you know, the usual, success in job, finding a significant other or maybe even something materialistic? Although I doubt you're interested in the last one", you laugh a little to take the edge off your slightly personal question.

"Dreams come true through steadily applied efforts not praying", with his sage like appearance, his words didn't came off as a shock.

"Not the best thing to say to a shrine maiden but I guess it's somewhat true", Quipping back you just looked at him with a smile, silently revelling on your familiarity with each other.

"What about you? You never look like you're having fun while working here.... As if you're the one who's not satisfied with you're job" His voice took a more serious note and asked the question you always tried to push away but for the first time, you felt safe. Safe in talking about things what most people around you would call blasphemy.

"Yeah well, I wouldn't say it's my life's calling. It's basically following the ideals that has been written by others and just blindly following them day in and day out", just as you finished your sentence you realised how shallow and sad you just sounded but the slightly widened eyes of Geto was what made you mentally kick yourself before you hastily try to smooth things over.

" But! It's not that bad! Once you get used to-", after a few lighthearted words to clear the heavy atmosphere that was building up you were cut off with one long finger hovering just above your lips.

" It's okay, you don't have to worry about being judged with me", not touching your lips he quickly retreats his hand back,

"It's only natural to question your ideals and beliefs when you actually start thinking about them, it's a proof of growing up. I can say it was the same for me as well, I had thought I'd spend my whole life sequestered in 'that' place but...." His gaze takes on a far off quality as his words fade.

"What changed then?", Without even knowing why, you urged him to continue.

"Well, I grew up and realised mine were just idealistic views, far from practical."

"Wait! How old are you now?!", Unable to ignore your budding curiosity you went on,

With a soft flick to your cheek he snorted in amusement, his low baritone made you recognise your own rudeness as you rub the non existent pain off of your face.

"It's not polite to ask strangers their age, regardless of their gender, young lady".

"I'm sorry! It's just, your answer...... Was kinda vague so...." Trailing off, the fact that he didn't owed you any explanations dawned on you making you stop. But the sudden halt in your unabashed questioning didn't go unnoticed by the long haired man so he continued, as if reading your thoughts.

"Everyone's entitled to act idiotically every once in a while but you sure are abusing your privilege", he went on, after a few words of sass.

" It took a while but, I soon discovered my true feelings about the world I lived in and how I wanted to change it", The unshakeable conviction of his voice reverberated through your ears and there seemd to be more to the hint of darkness in his downcast eyes, but further questions left your brain as you felt genuine resolve through his words.

Before you could process what's happening, Geto pulled you in close, resting his hands on either side of the brigde railings, caging you inbetween the low wall and his body.

"How about we run away to a better world together?", not waiting for you to protest he spoke. The words falling from his lips were casual enough to make you overlook the outrageousness of their meaning and your oddly intimate position did nothing to stop your brain from short circuiting.

"The decision is yours y/n but I'll be waiting anyway," his voice seems to trail a little before he bends down, his thin lips ghosting over your right ear, " you see, I hate it when even the good gets destroyed along with the bad", with that he quickly pulles his body back, letting you have your personal space again.

"I'll come back here at 8 'o' clock tonight",

After announcing that smoothly, he turns his back away and walks off to the exit, leaving you gob smacked at his confusing words.You watch him saunter off, still to awestruck to move when you finally take a note of your own unsteady breaths and face that radiated heat rivaling the sun atop.

" Who would- even go along with that crazy idea", your meek words get lost in the now empty place but the longing in your eyes to see what lied beyond your conservative lifestyle was as clear as the autumn sky hanging above.

You turn your back on the place and jog off in an effort to escape your own complicated feelings on the matter. His casually spoken words clawed at your heart, an entire different life was just one step away and it was shocking to even you how much trust you were subconsciously putting in every single word he says.

The conflicting thoughts in your head kept you busy the entire walk from the bridge to at the door of the only home you had known for so many years and never once your feet held such hesitation as you entered the building to continue the tasks you had left behind for the momentary change you craved so much.

The evening passed by in a flash, the thumping of your heart only getting louder with each passing hour. You just got out of your bath and were getting ready to help with dinner when you heard two voices coming form one of the senior priestess's room

"I saw her talking to a man, he didn't looked like a -", their words weren't clear but one thing was. Their topic of discussion was you.

"No he was wearing a hakama", it was getting harder and harder to breath with every second. If they were to tell that to your other supervisors then it would become very difficult for you to live here.

"So he could be from a neighbouring temple, maybe just asking about something general?"

"But weren't they standing too close?"

Listening in from behind the door all you could make out was that they clearly saw you and Geto, but one thing was certain. You were about to be very strictly reprimanded for just having curiosity.

Before you could even think up of some excuses to get yourself out of this mess the previous offer of his night time rendezvous flashed in your mind. It got you thinking, if you were going to be made to stay under supervision for a while anyway then the least you could do was to meet Geto one more time so as to let him know that his idea was indeed crazy and that life wasn't that easy for you to give up on everything you've done until now just on a whim.

You couldn't exactly get to a proper conclusion, sure leaving seemed like the better option but the fact that you'll be heavily dependent on Geto for everything didn't sit will with you either. It's not like you had any other skills or connections and even if he said he'd take you with him, you weren't fully ready to trust him on that. Why would you? It's not like you two were connected or related in any way.

The meeting time was approaching fast and since it's dinner time soon most of the girls would be around the dining area to help. It was the perfect opportunity to slip out unnoticed and come back after explaining things to the kind person who brought a few extra colors in your dull life.

Shakily you made you way to the back door, knowing full well you're about to commit another offense.

In a few minutes you reached the bridge, it was empty right now, indicated that your are ether early or that maybe Geto was actually just messing with you and oddly enough you felt your stomach drop at the thought of the second option.

But before you could overthink out the negative options you sense eyes on your back and whirl around to see a happy looking Geto strutting towards you.

" I take it you have decided to entrust yourself to me?", Greeting you with his self assured words he smiles amicably at you.

" Actually- I've decided to not leave", you say, with both sadness and regret in your voice.

He listenes to you in silence, his face doesn't look convinced no matter how much you explain but he never interrupts you until you're finished.

" So, Is that what you really want? To rot in a place which binds you to unnecessary obligations?", He blankly says, after you're done.

"It's only natural to lose something in order to attain greater things y/n", steping in your personal space again he peers at you face, his eyes were slited enough to hide their true intentions yet leaving just enough space for the moonlight to give them an otherworldly glow.

His beautiful face just centimetres away from yours and before you can finish he grabs you by the chin and delivers a mind blowing kiss.

This wasn't good for your heart. Your previous resolve was melting, just like the rest of you. Geto quickly slipped his hot tongue inside your mouth, exploring every nook and cranny of it.

"Why are you going so far?", You ask, still not entirely convinced.

" Because we are the same, that's why I know what you want and I can give that to you. So trust me okay?", A few seconds pass as you both stare into each other, when you finally heave a sigh of defeat.

" I do want more than just a life of modesty,", having changed you decision yet again you look up at the man in a renewed resolve.

"That's my girl!", Almost excitedly he envelopes you in a warm hug,

"Well y/n? How exactly do you want to celebrate your new found freedom? ", giving his words a suggestive tone he leaned forward to press his lips against your ear, placing light kisses up and down its lobe.

A surge of heat runs through your confounded heart, voice raspy as you reply " Ofcourse I want to do it with you", the snickering above you made you realise the innuendo your words held,

" I meant the celebration! It as in the CELEBRATION OKAY?!", Frantically, you push against his chest to break your embrace, trying to explain the simple meaning behind your previous words but even so, you'd be lying to yourself if you said that the thought of sleeping with him never crossed your mind.

The unmarried virgin criteria you had to fulfill in order to be a shrine maiden was in the past now. So you couldn't find any reason to hold back now.

" I'd be an honor," Geto's melodious voice reverberated through the entire room and you whip your head upwards to look for the confirmation you needed.

With minimal amount of words Geto took you to a near by cottage, saying he atleast wanted your first time to be in a proper place. You thought he was staying at just a room in that cottage but it turned out he had rented the entire place.

For you, it was quite a luxurious thing, while it was something you'd love to revel in, you had other, more important matters to give your attention too.

With a soft click, Geto opens the bedroom door and ushers you in, you breathing coming out irregular, and you were almost shaking in both excitement and nervousness.

What if he doesn't like how I look like naked? Would he like it better if I had shaved? Wait- I hope I'm not wearing my ugly panties today!. While you were freting the small details, the long haired man quietly made his way towards the bed, where you sat, buring his face at the crook of your neck as his arms wrap themselves around you.

"White suites you",His voice rumbled in your ears, his tone as smooth and sweet as honey when he slipped his hand inside the collar of your top, parting the neatly tucked fabric until your chest was exposed. The sudden contact with the air and his hands made your nipples perk up. He fondles them a little while kissing up your neck and shoulders.

Slowly he undos the cloth belts that tied your red hakama to place and eventually you feel them loosen up and then down to the ground, leaving you in just your open white kosode.

Being so exposed in front of a man and that too for the first time made you instinctively cover your chest and crotch, but it was pointless really, because even your hands couldn't hide the dampness of your panties from the sharp eyes that seems to look straight through your meek attempt at modesty.

"Come on, show me everything", his eyes met yours, all attention on you and it was almost disconcerting how vulnerable his eyes made you feel.

Felling a warm rush of blood to your face, you slowly loosen the grip of your hands around your body, letting Suguru pry them off until they rested limply on your sides. Slowly you lie down flat on your back, shyly looking away.

"Getting embarrassed is fine, but there's no need to hid yourself, It's only natural to want to look at your lover's body",He says it with such low, sweet, seduction that your toes curl in response, the word 'lover' ringing in your ears sent your heart in a frenzy.

Slipping the rest of your garments off of your shoulders he gently kisses your ear, licking the contours of your jaw and all the way to the hollow of your throat. His mouth nibbed at the skin beneath as his smooth tongue caressed the marks it left behind.

Soon he latched his lips onto on of your nipples, his teeth grazing the hardened tips pulled a few moans out of you, his long hair tickled your skin wherever they fell and it took everything in you to stop yourself from grabbing onto them.

Moving lower, he soon reached your pussy, already dripping with arousal. You felt his breath on your folds as spreaded them with one of his hand and gave the smooth space inbetween a long lick.

Sucking on your clit with fervor, his arms around your hips traced it's dips and curves as he delves deeper into your moistened sex. Your moans were inevitable at this point, the feeling his mouth in the most intimate part of your body was making you shiver in ecstasy but as soon as he brought his hand near your hole you felt your thighs clench.

"Don't worry I'll only use one finger at a time to get you all nice and ready for later" Gentle reassurances flowed naturally out of his mouth as he covers his fingers in your slick before spreading your pussy more.

His digits push past your folds and buries themselves deep into your throbbing pussy, the sensation of being penetrated both new and arousing. Geto slowing moves his finger in and out as his tongue latches on to your clit again.

The sensations of being licked and fingered together intermingled in your body, bringing you closer to your release in no time. Although it was a good thing you didn't wanted to end it so quickly. He was undeniably good with his hands, knowing when exactly to add another finger or when to curl or rub them inside.

Maybe it's because it was your first time but the onslaught of your orgasm leaves you shaking and moaning wildly in the most unladylike ways you have ever acted. It was embarrassing how much you ended up enjoying while Geto did all the work.

Though he pushes you to your limit you can't help but want to watch his every movement, anticipation building inside you when he raises his head and props himself on his knees to get a better look at your blissed out face. You let out a sigh of longing as he bought his glistening digits to near your face as a proof of you how good he made you feel.

" I'm glad you like it honey", his voice dangerously seductive, he licks his fingers just as erotically, making you embarrassed.

" Let's move onto the part where you cum on my cock now shall we?", His crudeness may have been shocking but right now all you cared about was the cumming part so you let him manhandle your throbbing form until he properly lines himself up against your hole.

Suguru didn't removed his cloths fully, just loosened his hakama just enough to whip his member out.

" Deep breaths now y/n", his gentle guiding eased your mind, and so you relax your body to take him in because even if it's your first time, you were pretty sure he was big enough to make anyone ache.

A warm tingling pain tears through your core which soon mealted into something more euphoric, unbearably good even, making you cry out in ecstasy. He filled you up to the brim and you wondered how bad it will ache tomorrow. As soon as he bottomed out in you, the entire aura of the person about you changed and the room felt like it dropped a few degrees in temperature.

It was not what you'd expected as your first time. Not the painfully rough speed he started with. Not the large hand around your neck that threatened to cut off your air supply. And certainly not the cold, detached look in his face.

Even when your breathing was getting shallower by the second you still writhed in pleasure. It was alarming as to how much you were willing to entrust your entire self to Suguru who was nothing if not composed, keeping his hand firmly around your neck while thrusting his member in and out of your pussy, fucking you like some sort of rag doll.

Long gone was the mild mannered person you looked up at with heart eyes, maybe he was just different in bed, that's what you wanted to tell yourself but the lack of consent and the level of his roughness kept you from doing so.

He eventually let go of your neck, only to flip you on your stomach and shoved his cock inside from an even deeper angle. He didn't let you tap out until you came twice, with your third orgasm approaching just as fast.

The sumptuous heat from his body lingers on yours for sometime even after he pulls himself out

And you felt that the longer you stayed in his embrace, the more darkness seeped into you which would surely make you go numb eventually

You wanted to ask Geto what was happening but a few broken screams were the only thing you could make out, everything was sudden, how the pain made your vision go white to then pitch black and as your consciousness left your body all you could hear was Geto's calm voice.

" Next time you wake up, well be in a better world"

The few rustling sounds of fabric brought you back to the waking world, the dark blue skies outside with flashes of gold inbetween told you it was just the crack of dawn.

You slowly prop yourself up in a sitting position to look around the unfamiliar room.

You catch your reflection in the nearby window next to your bed, you looked the same save for the few indecipherable marks here and there.

" Good morning y/n", Quickly looking at your right, you see Geto just walking out of the bath, his mascular form only covered by a thin cottan kimono.

He was behaving normally, as if the events of last night didn't happen. So normally that you were starting to think you may have hallucinated the whole thing.

Walking towards your sitting form, Geto bends down to cup your jaw and layers his mouth on yours, the scent of his shampoo tingling your senses almost made you forget about everything else.

He breaks the kiss, gazing at your downcasted eyes, the heat from your face made him chuckle.

"Quite an innocent reaction considering all the things we've done", he smirks triumphantly at you, his eyes a mix of dark but intense passion. All the things huh. You thought. Your mind was still in a haze and it was talking longer to process your words and thoughts.

"What happened last night?, I can't remember everything properly", you were expecting straight answers, that how did you passed out or where you exactly were right now but Geto seemed to go off on his own tangent.

You were just like my past self,", were, he said. As if you're something else now. The man in front of you was changing his colors faster than you could comprehend his words and it was terrifying you.

"That's why it's my duty to show you everything that life has to offer, the entire extent of it. As long as you stay by my side.", Not paying an ounce of attention to your shocked state he want on,

" The people you were staying with before were only going to confuse you further, that's why I had to take you away".

"You are the most free and safest at my side, darling. But if you still want your preistess life back then, I'll be your god and you can spend the rest of your life worshipping me instead"

Of course, he didn't saw you as an equal who could stand beside him, you weren't even his lover, just someone below him who he needed to worship the ground he walked upon in. But even so, the fear you experienced just a few minutes ago dissipated, bringing back the curiosity that was at its height whenever he was around.

"Were you lonely?",Geto's eyes trailed up and down your face which halted in their track after hearing your words which oddly resembled pity.

" What-", the previously composed and slitted eyes expanded a little before his expression abruptly shifts, turning serious, making you flinch under its sharp gaze, the animosity that surrounded him contrasted with the previous tender kisses and touch.

With his one large hand he grabbed your face from the base of your jaw, painfully lifting it up until your entire body was a few centimetres above the surface of the bed.

" Listen up y/n, I didn't brought you here to dote on you and the only reason I wiped out your silly little shrine because I can't stand hypocrites who spread false teachings written by equally hypocritical people. It was your job to worship things you couldn't see before and now you have to do the same job for someone you can see. That's. All."

"Ofcourse, leaving isn't an option.I've turned your body into a reincarnated curse. If any of the Jujutsu tech people caught you roaming around, it'll be instant exorcism for you." He lets go of your face and sits next to your form, Geto was quite for a while, giving you time to sort out your own feelings on the matter.

You knew what was happening now. Inbetween those conceited words flashes of the warm blooded man behind the god slipped out and you had to resist the overwhelming urge to comfort the person who just confessed to have burnt down the shire you were living in just until a few days ago. Maybe your thought process was altered just like the rest of you body, or maybe you were always this crazy too.

The source of your sympathy was unknown but the twisted obsession of his was provided you with more solid answers.

Your meeting, the conversations, how you eloped together. All of it made sense now. He wanted to save you from the oppressive state of the place you had spend most of your life in, ofcourse he would. He was thinking of you in ways no one ever had. He loved you in ways no one ever will, or could for that matter.

And you,

You loved him too. You had to.

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