#I felt like i was guessing on so many of them but still selecting ones that might make sense in a way

[deepwoundsandfadedscars]

.

[undead-supernova]

Masterlist

plot: your friendship with Eddie is still so new. and it's good. so good. but how do you learn to let go of the past and enjoy the present when your life is such a stark contrast from the life you once had?

pairings: modern!bestfriend!Eddie x bisexual!fem!reader

important note: GUESS WHO IS BACK!!!!! thought you'd seen the last of me but here I am!!!! this is a one-off of my High Tolerance series! (this is roughly three months after they first met!) divider by @strangergraphics also, Eddie's outfit is inspired by this fanart by @aicosu!

warnings: reader having insecurities, friend betrayal, smoking cigarettes, alcohol, a helping of lovely fluff and giggles, LOTS OF DIALOGUE!!!

this is so so so heavily inspired by all my ghosts by Lizzy McAlpine!!!!! welcome to their lore!

wc: 4.3k

It’s odd, the way change, good change can alter your mind. There’s something so moving about it, this newfound knowledge that something you thought would last forever was purely momentary.

Take this change for example, the kind that you never expected would arise three months ago. A new friend, a now close friend that was shifting the way you saw yourself and saw the world. A friend you didn’t really think could possibly exist, stuck only in half-realistic novels and 40,000-word fanfictions.

But here was this guy, this thunderstorm of a man who had changed your life in such a short amount of time. Eddie Munson said that you were his new best friend. And he seems, at least for now, to have meant it.

There was nothing like late September, when the humidity let up and light jackets were pulled in tight. A cool breeze started to set in, leaving Southerners at ease for the first time since March. Late September, where life felt even more like a gift.

So, when Eddie asked if you wanted to go on a night drive, you couldn’t say yes fast enough.

He picked you up, even going so far as to lean over and open the door for you. You hoisted yourself up, drawn in by his casual apparel. Tonight, he was dressed in a charcoal sweater, different holes being held together by safety pins. He was snug in his black leggings and boots, wrists still littered with bracelets. Knuckles still shadowed by rings. 

The only thing that felt unusual was the distinct scent of cologne that wafted toward you the second your seatbelt clicked. The sandalwood, that musk tinging with spice. An overflow of fragrance that was making your head a tad fuzzy.

“Wow, you smell good,” were the first words out of your mouth.

“You think so?” he asked, a smile tugging at his lips.

Avoiding the question, you asked, “Where are we headed tonight?”

The last breath of marigold sunset melted in his eyes. “Well, first, we need snacks. Lots of them.”

There was nothing better than a stroll through a QuickTrip, the many aisles usually guiding you to the drink selection that felt like a playground. What would it be tonight? Dr. Pepper? Apple juice? RedBull? Chocolate milk? Strawberry?

But there was something that seemed to switch on for you, standing in that cold air. This trepidation that figures would creep up behind you, shadows that could shatter your life with a quick snap. You went back to your ponderings, as if it was out of your hands. The reflections that came quickly under the fluorescent lights, the recognition that change brought about many emotions, many memories that you’d rather leave buried.

You could feel their presence as you grabbed strawberry milk and made your way to the candy aisle. It was there you caught Eddie crouched down, trying to decide between Reese’s peanut butter cups and 3 Musketeers. The ghosts felt ready to pounce at any chance they got, swirling in your head with a vibrancy you hadn’t anticipated. Months of being tossed around like a rag doll, made to believe that your best friend was a monster. Were complicit in their games. 

“You need to try Red Vines.”

Eddie sprung back up, leaving you to blink for a moment as your eyes adjusted to the pack he thrusted in front of your face.

“Oh, you mean red sticks of chalk?” you wondered, lifting an eyebrow. “Yeah, no thanks.”

He pretended to get upset, jolting back as if you’d stung him. “Jeez, don’t be such a hater.”

“I’m the biggest hater for Red Vines.”

He pouted. “That’s fucked up.”

Shrugging, you threw up your hands. “More for you!” 

“Yeah, but we could’ve enjoyed it together,” he groaned.

“Poor thing,” you said sarcastically, imitating his pout.

His eyes narrowed. “You are brutal, sweetheart.”

Sweetheart?

“Sweetheart?”

He searched your face, his widening eyes mirroring yours. As if he’d been caught. As if he were in trouble. “What, can I not call you sweetheart?”

He said it again.

Heat was starting to build in your neck, your face. “Um, uh…”

Eddie’s eyes screwed shut. “Shit, sorry—”

“No!” you exclaimed. “It’s not that. It’s just—”

“Lame.”

“Gentle.”

His eyelids opened, now surprised. A hush fell over you as you made eye contact, the only sound being his fiddling with the Red Vines packaging and the muffled hum of “Hold Me Now” by Thompson Twins coming through the speakers.

“Uh,” he started, a flash of red appearing on his cheeks. “Is that a bad thing?”

“It’s a good thing,” you assured him. “It’s just…unexpected.”

For the last few months, you truly believed you didn’t know what to think of Eddie. But in that moment, you realized that maybe the chains and the hair and his choice of music and movies had played a part in your blind observations. And it’s not that you thought that Eddie couldn’t be gentle. You just supposed he might be a little harder than he was.

But the way he said the pet name—nickname, the way it fit so softly in his mouth, his voice. You couldn’t help but feel a calmness washing over you at the sentiment. 

“It’s kind,” you answered.

His mood seemed to lift. “So, can I, like, keep calling you sweetheart?”

“Yes—” you said a little too quickly, clearing your throat to pause. “I, uh. Yeah. Yes.”

“Alright,” he replied, a smile lurking on his lips. “Sweetheart.”

You surely could’ve died right there.

During the day, Atlanta was a clusterfuck of traffic, chaos in the lack of turning signals and kindness to let people over. Nothing but honks and just-missed accidents. But at night, even in an overflow of traffic, the city seemed to turn electric. There was something in the air that made it magnetic, the sparkle of office buildings and street lamps guiding you towards your destination with ease. That orange glow that highlighted the path forward, the kind that made you wonder if you’d entered an alternate dimension.

And there beside you was your best friend. You couldn’t love anything more than riding shotgun next to Eddie, watching him belt out the lyrics to a Killers song in between shimmers of light dancing off his profile. “When You Were Young” set the scene for your journey, turning cinematic in nature.

This was so different from the life you knew mere months ago. The long nights of loneliness, staving off any thoughts of the friends that seemed to fade away as soon as you’d made new ones. And maybe it’d been stupid—pathetic—how much you cried. How much you hated yourself and hated the way you’d been used. 

But it was nothing compared to the self-loathing. That knowledge that you had everything to do with the downfall of not just your reputation, but the people who you’d held close. Especially one.

“Hey, you doing okay?” Eddie asked, turning down the volume. The crackle blaring from the speakers was what really caught your attention.

It was stupid, really. The they-said, she-said. The college drama that looked a little too much like high school. Maybe it was in the way outcasts find each other and realize they have too much growing up to do—and that involves recreating the high school experiences they never had. You just so happened to get lost in that crossfire and became the ostracized fool used in their petty schemes. 

You nodded, unable to keep the fake smile on your lips. “Yeah, yeah. Just taking everything in.”

“Care to elaborate on ‘everything’?”

You wondered what you’d tell her if given the second chance. How you’d describe Eddie’s friendship and the way you thought that they’d get along. If she were here, still attached at the goddamn hip, what would she say? How would she act? 

Who is she now?

“Have you ever royally fucked up your life and had to find a way to start over?”

“Uh, yeah,” Eddie drawled, letting out a low whistle. “Big time.” With a gentle sigh and a glance over at you, he asked, “Have I ever mentioned Ronnie?”

“Ronnie?”

“Guess not,” he said with a shrug. “Well, Ronnie and I were best friends in high school. I mean, super close. Like, we lived in the same trailer park and rode to school together every day until, like, two months before she graduated. Ever heard of a prom?”

You snorted. “Yeah, Eddie. I’ve heard of a prom.”

“Just had to check. Didn’t know if Southerners were too busy doing, like, cotillion or debutante balls or whatever.”

Rolling your eyes, you pushed out the memory of hairspray and curlers as you responded, “Well, we do but high schools have proms.”

“Excellent. Well, I kinda asked her to prom and she, you know, said yes.”

“You were dating?”

“Nah. No. It was nothing like that. I just…” He sighed. “I wanted to do something nice for her. Senior year and all. Since I was being held back another year, I wanted to put more effort in. Ron never dated anyone in high school, and it was her choice. Like, she didn’t want to date anyone ever. But I thought that because it was the last chance, I’d do something cheesy and fun. And she said yes which was really cool. I saved up to rent a suit and everything. But come like, fuck, three days before prom, she told me she was going with a group of girls instead.”

Your eyebrows furrowed. “The fuck? Why would she do that?”

Eddie grimaced. “They were all going to the same college. Thinking about it now, I guess she just wanted to have some kinda safety net going in. But, at the time, I was fucking furious. Like, this is my best friend. I spent the little money I’d had on renting a suit. In advance. And there was a cancellation fee. In a small town with fuck all people. Tell me how that makes any sense.” Eddie rolled his eyes. “Anyways, I was pissed. So, I went over to her place and just fucking unloaded.

“I told her she was selfish for trying to fit in with these lame girls who she’d hardly spoken to. Ronnie told me that I didn’t know shit about who she did and didn’t talk to. And when I tried to tell her we’d been best friends since we were kids and that I definitely knew who she did and didn’t hang out with, she told me that she’d been buddying up with these girls at school for months. Oh, and that she never told me because she knew how I’d react.”

“Y’all never resolved it?” you asked after he paused. “It seems like a mild miscommunication.”

“Well, it wasn’t exactly a mild fight, especially at seventeen,” he said with a quick glance over at you. “I told her she was a piece of shit for hanging out with these rich fucks who would never understand her or let go of the fact that we’re ‘trailer park trash’—again, I was seventeen so I had no idea I shouldn’t even think like that.

"But she said that, you know, not all rich kids are as judgmental as I thought they were and that these girls were kind. It didn’t matter if Chrissy and Heather were on the cheer squad. They liked her for her. Guess I couldn’t stomach it. I told her she was a gullible idiot. She told me to fuck off since I was clearly jealous that she had friends and I didn’t. Which is, shit, half-true.

“I told her to get her rich little friends to pay me back for my stupid tux and then to leave my life for good. I honest-to-god convinced myself that that had been her plan all along—get the full-ride scholarship and ditch her best friend. The next morning, I found an envelope with enough cash to cover my tux and Wayne and I’s bills for, like, three months with a note telling me that she’d never forgive me for what I said to her and…to have a good life.” 

You noticed his eyes begin to glass over, as if it was too painful for him to stomach. “And…and there was a note from Chrissy. Chrissy fucking Cunningham, this perfect-looking cheerleader that had the biggest dickhead for a boyfriend—captain of the goddamn basketball team and as hardcore Christian as people are here.” He shook his head. “Yeah, she, uh, told me that she was sorry that people treated me like shit and that, for what it was worth, she’d done everything she could to stop the bullying but failed. And she didn’t want to graduate without letting me know she’d always found me cool and to just push through. Said she believed in me and my music and everything.”

A tear escaped Eddie’s lashes. Without hesitation, you reached over to catch it before it cascaded down his cheek. And without any knowledge as to why, your pointer finger lingered there, brushing his skin. As if it was second nature.

You could’ve sworn you saw his tense posture ease, his spine finally meeting the seat. But he kept his eyes on the road, leaving you to remove your finger when he turned on his blinker. You didn’t look away from him as he veered off onto your exit.  

“I met all those weird kids that next school year and through them found Robin and Steve. Fucking Steve Harrington who was born into money and was popular and shit. I mean, his nickname was King Steve. Like, how fucking pretentious, right? But he’s one of the nicest guys I’ve ever met. Sometimes he’s a little stupid, the definition of a himbo, but nice nonetheless. He helped Wayne and I out the moment he caught wind from Robin that we were close to getting evicted. All three of us worked and got our degrees online at night. Then we…came here.”

You couldn’t help but watch him, noticing the way that he was filtering between different emotions by the second, as if he didn’t know how to feel about it. Even now.

“All of this to say…yeah, I’ve royally fucked up before. I made that bed. I lie in it every day of my life.” 

You stayed quiet as he pulled into the parking space facing your apartment building. The poor excuse for a streetlamp barely gave way to his features now. But Eddie turned his torso to face you, fingers tapping along the cupholder. His eyes found yours, the captivating brown swallowing you in its intensity. “Okay, so what’s your story? How’d you royally fuck things up?”

The only thing you could do was pause, the stillness of the van and the distant hum of cicadas finally allowing you respite. You couldn’t help but search his eyes, trying to find a reason to keep him in the dark, to keep that hidden pain inside and shield him from your mistakes.

But it was in that scouring that you realized that you had no reason to hide. If Eddie was willing to show the nasty parts of himself, why shouldn’t you?

“Can we go inside first?”

One spilled pot of mac and cheese, two cigarettes, and three shots of vodka later, you finally told Eddie what happened.

You both sat criss-crossed on the rug next to your coffee table, facing one another. Stray hairs fell over Eddie’s face, his curls now wrapped into a low bun. You couldn’t help but find it cute, even in the face of your unspoken history being brought to the surface.

“I had kind of a big friend group the last few years of college,” you started finally. “I had this D&D group with a few of them and I was really happy. But then I met this other group one night and, I don’t know, I guess I just felt this desire to be loved.

“It was these two couples who’d been best friends since high school and they found out that I was bi and since all of them were too, they thought it would be fun if we all kissed each other and even, like, go further, I guess. We never did the further thing, though.”

“This is the gayest thing I’ve ever heard,” Eddie commented, a hint of a playful smile on his lips.

This made you chuckle. “I know, right? Truly doomed by the narrative since the start.”

“Truly.” 

“So, anyways, I hung out with them a lot. Smoked a lot and kinda forgot my other friendships. I still saw them, but I was just so intrigued by how much those people wanted me. Me, some girl from Tennessee who hadn’t seen much and was in this huge city and… I think I got blinded by the opportunity to have four different people want me like that. I don’t even think I realized I was being used until it was all over.

“One of them even told me what to say whenever we all hung out. Just to, like, put out feelers for kissing, I guess? And I would say what they told me to and just giggle because I thought it was just stupid fun. Like, they knew the others better than I did so, to me, it was just a harmless joke. I didn’t actually expect for us to kiss all the time. We were supposed to be friends first. I even thought we were all close friends by the end of it.”

“What about your other friends?” Eddie asked. “Where did they go?”

“Well, they were trying to tell me that I wasn’t the same, that I was acting all weird and that it wasn’t like me to keep skipping sessions. They told me that they didn’t even like my new friends and that they were worried about me. That they’d heard bad things about them. And because I had a big mouth, I brought this up with the new friends and they just…” You took a deep breath, trying to keep everything inside you from erupting. “They told me to leave everyone. To forget about people who were hating on us for no reason. So…I did. But that’s when it all went to shit.”

It took another deep breath for your heart to slow, the resurfaced memories as bright as they could be. The feverish kisses in their dorm room, the twining of hands in hallway shadows. Their dark blue hair in your hands, tongue piercing brushing against your lips. How it was all you craved, how it was the most painful guilt you’d ever experienced. 

“The one that asked me to say stuff…we kinda kissed when other people weren’t around. And I didn’t know it, but they’d dated one of my other friends.”

“The one that did the D&D group?”

“Yeah, she’d been my best friend. But they’d dated long before I knew the person.”

“So, what, this new new friend didn’t want you being friends with their ex?”

“And said ex didn’t want me being friends with this new new friend. She was trying to warn me, but I didn’t understand. I didn’t get it.”

“Wait,” Eddie said, holding up his hand. “Okay, I think I’m getting confused. They’ve both got names, correct?”

You couldn’t help but chuckle again. “Okay, so Blake, my best friend at the time, was dating Devon who was part of this new new friend group. Blake tried to warn me that Devon was bad, but Devon was saying the same stuff about Blake. And then Devon was the one I kissed when their boyfriend, Ryan, wasn’t around. Which I admit is shitty of me, but Devon swore they were in an open relationship. Which I really did believe. We were all kissing, you know?”

“I’m guessing they weren’t.”

With a nod, you continued. “This group only lasted, like, five months at the most. After New Year’s which, by the way, was spent with all of us making out and being the gayest group of people on Earth, I suddenly had absolutely no contact with them. They all ghosted me. And when I asked Devon what was up, they told me that the kissing was too much and that they were concerned I was getting too close. And that I wanted more from them than they wanted from me ‘cause they were in a happy relationship.

"Which, not that it matters, but they weren’t. Both couples fought in front of me all the time. It was bizarre how many times it was like I wasn’t even there.”

You couldn’t help but think of the day all five of you went on a hike together. Devon and Ryan passed around a four-hundred dollar dab rig that they thought was a great idea to bring into the woods. Devon slipped on a rock, causing the dab rig to crack which then resulted in a full-on screaming match. Ryan unloaded into Devon, wondering how they could be so stupid. Devon had stayed at your apartment that night, crying in your arms. The other couple, Eve and Corie, had just as many arguments, usually pissing contests over who was more unhappy. It truly was a bizarre time in your life.

“And all this time…I resented the friends that I’d been close with. I resented Blake for so fucking long. I just thought she was so judgmental and rude and mean and…” Shaking your head, you turned away from Eddie. You couldn’t stand to look at him, to remember that he was even listening to you. “I let her down and couldn’t even go back because she didn’t want me. None of them did. Blake, Lisa, Jessie, and Jana told me that what was done was done and that I couldn’t come back. No matter how much I apologized.” 

“They didn’t even hear you out?”

“Nope.”

“Well, that’s kinda bullshit.” The comment made you turn back to him, watching as he shook his head. “I mean, you made some bad friends, yeah, but you realized you fucked up and had the balls to face them and apologize. They could’ve heard you out. Especially Blake.”

“Couldn’t you say the same about Ronnie?” you questioned.

You thought it would sound harsher than you meant it, but Eddie understood. He gave you a half-smile. “Yeah, you’re right. I could.”

Nodding, you added, “I take responsibility for the role I played in the destruction. I regret hurting them every day. Mixing friendship and romance is…” You sighed, shaking your head. “I don’t know. It’s tricky.”

His eyebrows lifted, voice laced with intrigue. “You didn’t mention it being romantic.”

“I said we kissed when Devon’s partner wasn’t there,” you stated plainly.

“Kissing and romance can be separate.”

A bitter scoff left your lips, quiet resentment still sitting in your bones. “Well, maybe I was the only one kissing with feeling then.” 

You never wanted to repeat that desperate yearning for someone that didn’t feel the same way. Never again would you waste your time on someone who didn’t want you. If lines were to blur and cross, you would have to draw a deep fucking strike in the sand. 

Especially if they were already in a relationship.

“I do know I was a homewrecker. I saw they broke up a few months later. All their pictures had been deleted off of Devon’s Instagram.”

“That relationship was unstable long before you came around,” he reasoned.

Shaking your head, you said, “Yeah, but I still kissed Devon when I was well aware they were dating Ryan.”

“And you haven’t stopped beating yourself up for your mistake for how long?”

“A little over a year,” you whispered.

Eddie paused, his eyes wandering around the room until they landed on you again. “So…when you said you were taking it all in…”

“I meant the fact that I actually have a friend again.”

“Best friend.”

As you gazed at him, you couldn’t help yourself from leaning over and wrapping your arms around his neck. 

“Woah,” he whispered before bringing you further into his grasp.

A rush of tears left your eyes, a choking sound leaving your lips. The release of a story once held too tightly to your chest, the understanding and compassion of someone who truly accepted you for your mistakes. It was overwhelming to feel this restored, to feel something unfurl and begin the process of mending. 

“I’m sorry,” you whispered.

“Don’t be,” he whispered back. “I’m guessing you haven’t told anyone?”

“There hasn’t been anyone to tell,” you admitted. 

You realized that this was the first time you’d ever hugged. 

“You’ve made a mistake, but that doesn’t mean you’re a piece of shit. You just got caught up in that feeling. I get it. I mean, I ruined shit by wanting to be picked over other people. It’s not the same, but it kinda is at the same time. So, I get it. I get you.” His eyes shifted away from you before they came back, elation filling them. “But guess what?”

“What?”

“We can move on. Together.”

“What do you mean?” you questioned.

“Well, we can keep each other in check. If you ever lose yourself in someone, I’ll let you know. I’m not going anywhere.”

You couldn’t help but blurt out, “You say that now.”

He lifted an eyebrow. “What, is that a challenge to prove you wrong?”

As you looked at him, you couldn’t deny that something was bubbling in your stomach. Bubbling? Blooming? Whatever it was, you liked it. “I don’t know, do you want it to be?”

“Yeah, maybe I do,” he stated, grinning.

And then Eddie was the one to initiate the hug, quickly wrangling you into his arms. You nearly sat on his lap, just holding one another. You couldn’t say how long you sat there, breaths lining up and grips tightening. 

Maybe looking back was the only way you could truly see how far you’d come. How far you were able to go now, with the past staying exactly where it needed to be. And, at least for now, you had Eddie at your side.

thank you to everyone who has been supporting me during this hiatus :') it has meant everything to me

[yourlocaltreesimp]

Swooning series pt. 2

Apologies for the really long intro, there’s content here i swear. Have some selectively mute wild as a treat <3

PT 1

Wild

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Through what few memories that Wild retained, his training stayed most clearly. Perhaps because it was so vigorous that it sunk its ways through the grooves in his brain. It proved useful knowing how to fight fresh out of the Shrine of Resurrection and was certainly a saving grace in multiple occasions, from earning rupees at small traveller‘s challenges or food from saving the wandering folk of his Hyrule, those days spent training as a knight were more useful than they initially let on. But there was one drawback that stuck, even as a century seeped past. He could not speak. At first it was for his integrity, to be seen as the hero he was meant to be. Not that he much enjoyed it when he first began training, he certainly didn’t feel like a hero, but if people felt more assured with his silence, then maybe he could fool himself that this was his role.

It first proved to truly be an issue when he joined the chain. Not knowing where he was or how he got there, he did a run through of his memories, faded as they were. But they were there. A boy looked down at him, in his younger teen years if he was pressed to guess. Wild had moved to stand despite the skull splitting headache and lingering ringing in his ear. One hundred years can’t fix everything, apparently. But the somewhat lax energy he had was offset by the ever so familiar feeling of the pricking of nerves. It seems there was more than just the one boy. In fact, there were seven others, each staring at him expectantly. And just like that, his throat seized so badly that breathing was difficult. He registered that someone asked him a question and stared blankly at the man who spoke, one eye bearing back into Wild‘s own. He raised shaky hands, trying in some way to communicate his situation of muteness only to cut himself short. The man had begun to sign. They were slightly different than the ones Wild were familiar with, but they would do.

It’d so long that he got comfortable with them, speaking occasionally. But you… you changed things. In many ways, he supposes. At first you were scary, unfamiliar and something entirely new. Like waking up from his 100 year sleep. You disoriented his mind and raptured his thoughts. It was jarring and yet something he didn’t want to surpress. And yet, you continued to catch his attention. You did not question that he did not speak, still finding ways to include him in your interactions. But the morning you greeted him with sign was perhaps the morning that he realised what his fixation on you meant. You were something he learned from readily, grew to respect and eventually love. Much like his own relation to his namesake. The wilds of his Hyrule were scary and unfamiliar, but with time became something that he learned from and adapted to, and now something he loves. But you were someone he wants to know. Not at surface level, but he wants to know you more than he knows of himself. He wants to know what drives you, what makes you precisely who you are. And maybe some small part of him wants you to know him. The scars, nightmares, trauma and every other thing he was told he shouldn’t be. You have his every thought and you hold his heart in your hands. He didn’t know how much he missed having this kind of love until you.

Goddesses, he’s grown weak.

But for you? That’s ok.

[sitp-recs]

hi! how are you?

so I read a fic some time ago that destroyed me…… like literally. I enjoyed it but at the same time I didn’t. but now I can’t stop thinking about it bc everything on it was so revolting and fucked. how to make a fic get out of our system? is it possible 😅 not to be dramatic but this fic almost made me lose interest in the whole ship lmao I just wanted to read something I enjoy again, you know? and nothing hits :( and when it does I’m almost finishing the fic and something horrible happens (that wasn’t really tagged) and I endure it until the end 💀 anyway if you have any fic that you read recently that is very romantic and monogamous or even if they are exes but they don’t date anyone else because they just can’t move on, pls share with us!! and it doesn’t have to be drarry, it can be anything. Im going through your lists and whole blog tbh looking for something that will save me lmaoooo I’ve read almost everything that interests me and you recced. (btw your break up make up list is amazing!) still I think the spark left me 🫠 ugh sorry for yapping

I’m sorry to hear that, anon :,( I think we’ve all been there at some point, god knows how many times I felt blocked, uninspired or just unable to connect to any fic. Personally, I find it helpful to take short breaks from fandom and focus on other hobbies for a while. Those fics will always be there when and if you’re ready to return! Also, imho you shouldn’t have to “endure” any fics that you find upsetting. I don’t typically have any triggers but I certainly have tropes/topics that don’t interest me much (or at all), and I have no qualms abandoning a fic when they show up unannounced 🤣

Now, it’s a bit hard to rec something randomly without knowing more about your fic tastes, but since you’re interested in romantic/monogamous stories, I thought I’d share some recs along those lines. This is a personal selection that might not work for you, but if it does I’ll be pleased to know that you’ve found that spark again :) Take care xo

Short fic:

Take the Moon by tackytiger (M, 15k)

Harry Potter has always wanted a family of his own, and when a deadly blood curse forces him into a marriage bond with his best friend Draco Malfoy, it looks like he might just have found one. It's just a shame they’d always planned to break up after a year…

Two Zinnias and the Scent of Lemon by @the-starryknight (M, 16k)

The Ministry didn’t turn bad overnight. Harry didn’t suddenly turn rogue either. Between covert Legilimency links and Polyjuice disguises and running and running and running, Draco has forgotten what it is like to have a safe harbor that isn’t a person. If there’s an art to fighting back, then they’ll find it hand in hand.

Us, in Lieu by Tepre (E, 29k)

Teddy needs help and Harry needs funding. Draco sits in the other room and plays the piano.

Long fic:

Little Deaths and How to Avoid Them by nerakrose, dustmouth (T, 96k)

Malfoy is way too interested in coroner reports for somebody who's definitely not looking for ways to die, Harry wants to be friends with him, and Ginny wants to break up with Harry.

Who we are in the shadows by Quicksilvermaid (E, 100k)

What happens when you’re forced to become the very thing you despise? Ex-Auror Harry Potter, tossed out of the Ministry for something he had no control over, has been looking for a way back to his former life.

Far From The Tree by aideomai (E, 112k)

The arrival of Harry Potter’s children—snapped back in time, the children themselves guessed, twenty or so years—was the most interesting thing to happen at Hogwarts for years.

[purpleinksplotch]

Too Sweet

Notes: So my dissertation is due in under a week and yet here I am writing Stray Kids smut, but we all cope with stress in different ways I guess.

This idea has been in my head for a while so here it goes. This is a SKZ poly ot8 fic with mated pairs Chanlix, Minsung, Jeongmin and eventual Hyunbin but it will be Hyunjin centric. Not sure how many parts it will be but if you like it let me know!

This chapter contains angst and some light smut.

---

Hyunjin was feeling lonely.

That might sound absurd coming from a man who had six partners, but it was the truth.

It had started last month during their weekly movie night. Whenever it was Hyunjin's turn to choose a film he nearly always picked romance, and that particular week was no exception. He had selected a cute office-romance that had been receiving good reviews and the pack all settled in to watch, with a few grumbles from the likes of Minho and Seungmin who protested that there was a new action-thriller out that they should watch instead. Chan had reminded them both that it was Hyunjin's turn to choose and so they were going to watch whatever he wanted, and it had only taken one sharp look from the pack leader for the pair of them to fall silent.

The film turned out to be pretty good, and Hyunjin was sitting on the floor of the living room clutching a pillow to his chest and kicking his feet while he watched the on-screen couple kiss for the first time.

"Ahhhh so cute! Aren't they so cute?"

When he didn't receive an answer, he peered over his shoulder and found to his dismay that none of the others were even paying attention. Felix had his eyes closed, curled up against Chan and smiling while his mate gently peppered kisses over Felix's forehead and cheeks. Jisung had fallen asleep on Minho's chest and was snoring quietly while Minho watched him with such a soft expression it might have made Hyunjin cry under different circumstances. Jeongin was technically looking at the screen, but it was obvious that he was more interested in whatever Seungmin was whispering in his ear than he was in the film. From the blush dusting his cheeks, Hyunjin was fairly certain they weren't discussing the intricacies of the plot.

At first he felt annoyed that none of them were bothering to pay attention to the film he had chosen, and he was about to open his mouth and whine when it suddenly struck him that he was being left out. There he was, sitting all alone on the floor, while the couples were cuddled up on the sofas not giving him a second thought.

Hurt lodged itself in his chest and he felt his eyes grew wet with tears. He wanted to get up and walk out of the room, but he knew if he did then someone would go after him and they would probably tease him for crying and say he was being a drama queen. Maybe he was, but he still felt sad that none of them had invited him to cuddle. As if they had simply forgotten he was there.

Over the following weeks, a few similar incidents occurred that only reinforced Hyunjin's growing paranoia. He was the only unmated pack member, but it had never bothered him too much because all seven of them were in a poly relationship anyway: they all loved each other and had committed to each other via pack bonds, and they all had a sexual relationship. So it wasn't as if he was starved of intimacy or affection, and he had always assumed he would meet his mate one day and then they would become a complete pack of eight.

But it had been over five years since Jeongin, their youngest member, had joined the pack and mated with Seungmin. For a while, there had been a possibility that Seungmin and Hyunjin would become mates: Hyunjin found the younger male unbelievably cute, and only Seungmin could make him howl with laughter until his cheeks ached and he could hardly breathe. For his part, Seungmin was comfortable around Hyunjin while he tended to clash easily with other pack members, and even though he wasn't the biggest fan of skinship he allowed Hyunjin to cuddle up to him without complaining -- and enjoyed it, even though he would deny this to his dying breath.

But as much as they adored each other, there was something not quite there. Hyunjin liked to be lavished with affection: he wanted to be spoiled and complimented, and any type of romantic gesture (be it unexpected gifts or spontaneous acts in the bedroom) made his knees weak. Seungmin was more subtle: he showed his love in quieter ways, like making sure his partners remembered to eat even if they were busy and giving them his own food if they forgot, or recognising when they needed space and when they needed someone to talk to and comfort them. Hyunjin wouldn't change Seungmin for the world, and when Jeongin had arrived and Seungmin was immediately smitten, Hyunjin knew that they had made the right call by never taking that final step.

He had hoped that one day he would find his own Jeongin -- someone who waltzed into his life and was perfect for him. But the years had continued to pass and Hyunjin was still alone. He had a full life: a pack who loved him, a comfortable home, plenty of money, a fulfilling job at a prestigious art dealership. Why couldn't he be content with that? Why did he still carry around an ache in his heart as if something -- someone -- was missing from his life?

Hyunjin didn't like feeling this way, but he stubbornly refused to speak to his pack mates about it. He didn't want to seem pathetic or needy, or worse have them pity him. He couldn't stand the idea of being looked at as the sad lone wolf who was desperate for a mate.

If there was one thing that always made him feel satisfied and cherished, it was good old-fashioned lovemaking. And yes, he called it that instead of fucking -- even if he had been known to scream out "Please fuck me!" in the middle of sex. It still counted as lovemaking if it was with people you loved.

So one Thursday evening when everyone was heading to bed, Hyunjin decided to wander along the corridor to Seungmin and Jeongin's room. He hadn't spent much time with either of them lately, and although Minho and Chan definitely took the top spots for being able to fuck him the hardest (and Hyunjin really needed to be fucked), the younger pair had more stamina, and Hyunjin would happily go without sleep tonight if it meant multiple orgasms.

"Ayenahhh!" he squealed as he launched himself onto the bed on top of their youngest member. Jeongin pretended to cry out in pain, but his beaming smile somewhat ruined the effect. He smelled like his favourite coconut-vanilla shampoo, and his hair was still slightly damp from the shower.

"I's too late for you to be this loud," he complained.

"It's not late," Hyunjin asserted, climbing into Jeongin's lap with a smirk. "In fact, I'd say the night is very young."

He leaned down to kiss him and Jeongin's soft lips responded quickly, but with less passion than Hyunjin would have liked.

"I'm so tired, I don't think I can do anything tonight," he said once they sat back.

"Oh."

Hyunjin's body deflated, feeling disappointed.

"Are you sure I can't convince you?"

"Not tonight," said Jeongin. "Maybe at the weekend though?"

A moment later Seungmin wandered out of the ensuite bathroom with a toothbrush in his mouth. His dark hair was also mussed and still wet. He and Jeongin probably showered together, and they might have fucked already. No wonder Jeongin was tired and not in the mood.

"You okay Jinnie?"

"I was hoping to maybe have a little fun tonight but Innie is tired." He winked at Seungmin. "Unless you're up for it Minnie?"

Hyunjin knew what the answer would be before the other man shook his head. Seungmin was a clean-freak and after he had brushed his teeth he was not interested in engaging in any further sexual activity on a given evening. It was one of his weird quirks that Hyunjin found strange and adorable in equal measure.

"I'm tired too, and I have to be up early for work tomorrow."

Hyunjin nodded. "Okay, I guess we can just cuddle instead."

"You won't just cuddle though, when you're horny you start grinding against people and keeping them awake," said Seungmin.

"I don't!" Hyunjin protested.

"You kind of do," Jeongin added.

"But--"

"Go find Felix, I'm sure he'll cuddle with you whether you're horny or not." With that, Seungmin turned and walked back into the bathroom.

Hyunjin couldn't help feeling like he had just been dismissed. Well, fuck him. He wasn't going to beg to stay if they didn't want him. He crawled off the bed and walked towards the door. Jeongin called goodnight behind him, Seungmin said nothing.

Even if Seungmin was being an asshole, Hyunjin decided to take his advice and go and find Felix. Maybe he needed some affection more than a hard fuck tonight after all, and there was no-one better to give him that than his sunshine. And if he was really lucky, maybe Chan would fuck him while Felix held his hand and kissed him and told him he was beautiful.

Hyunjin practically ran to Felix and Chan's room, and he was about to open the door when he heard a soft but deep moan coming from inside. His cock stirred in his pants. Sure enough when he pushed the door open and peeked inside he had to stifle a gasp at the sight before him.

Felix and Chan were both naked, spread out on the bed with Chan on his back and Felix slowly sliding up and down his cock. From this angle, Hyunjin had a perfect view of the pack leader's thick length disappearing into Felix's tiny hole, stretching him out while the blonde whimpered and leaned down to pull him into a desperate kiss.

Hyunjin's mouth practically watered. He couldn't decide which of them he was more jealous of: whether he wanted Felix to ride his cock instead or whether he wanted to take his place and have Chan stretching out his hole until it felt like he would burst. His own cock stiffened and he was about to walk into the room and join them on the bed when something stopped him.

"I love you."

The words were so quiet, so delicate as they fell from Felix's trembling lips. Barely more than a whisper, a whisper that was meant for one person alone.

Chan reached up to cup his face and brushed a strand of Felix's hair behind his ear. The gesture was so tender that Hyunjin felt guilty for witnessing it.

The pack leader spoke to Felix so quietly that Hyunjin couldn't hear what he said, he could only watch Chan's fingers trace down Felix's spine and wrap Felix's small body in his strong arms. If Chan had looked over he would have spotted Hyunjin watching them, but he never once took his eyes off his mate.

With a stinging heart, Hyunjin closed the door. There was no place for him in that room. 

At this point, he was beginning to feel less horny and simply lonely. He would honestly just take a hug from one of his pack mates right now. With only one room left to try, Hyunjin found himself outside Minho and Jisung's door.

He couldn't hear any noises coming from inside, but he decided to knock anyway.

At first there was no answer, and then footsteps padded across the room and the door opened to reveal Minho. He looked very domestic in his black-framed glasses, grey sweatpants and baggy t-shirt that Hyunjin was fairly certain used to belong to Chan. Swapping clothes was one of the many benefits of their relationship.

"Oh, Hyunjin," said Minho. "You need something?"

Behind him, Hyunjin could see Jisung lounging on the bed with a paused Studio Ghibli film on his laptop. They must have been watching it together.

"Nothing in particular I just... Can I join you both?"

He was dying to fall into Minho's strong arms and be carried to the bed, where he could cuddle up between him and Jisung. He didn't much care whether they had sex or whether they just watched the rest of whatever film was playing, as long as he could get some comfort.

And so it felt like a knife in his heart when Minho hesitated and glanced back at Jisung awkwardly.

"Um, actually Jinnie we were hoping to have a night to ourselves," Minho admitted. "Kind of an impromptu date night."

Faced with his third rejection of the evening, there was only so long Hyunjin could remain rational and calm. It was fifty-fifty whether he started crying or yelling, and apparently tonight anger was taking the reins.

"Don't you do that every night? You share a room."

"Yes but we don't always take the time to talk or watch a film together and spend proper quality time with each other," Minho explained.

Hyunjin sighed irritably. "Can you not do it tomorrow instead? I really don't want to be alone tonight."

"I'm sorry Jinnie, we really want to have this time to ourselves--"

"Why?!" Hyunjin burst out. He could pinpoint the exact moment Minho's expression shifted from apologetic to furious.

"What do you mean why? I'm telling you I want to spend time with my mate and you're being selfish."

Hyunjin scoffed. "I'm selfish?! Oh I'm sorry that coming to my pack mates for comfort makes me selfish."

"That doesn't make you selfish. Demanding that we reschedule our date night just because you're bored and want to bother us makes you selfish."

"Oh I'm a bother now?"

"Currently, yes," said Minho coldly.

"Hyunjin," Jisung's head popped up timidly behind Minho's shoulder. "We're not trying to be mean, we just want a little privacy for tonight."

"You can have privacy literally anytime you want. Why is it the one time I come to you and say I need some comfort you're suddenly kicking me out?"

"If you really need comfort you can go to one of the others, but honestly I think you're just being a brat and don't like being told no."

Hyunjin wanted to scream at Minho that he'd already been to all of the others and none of them wanted him, but what was the point? He clearly wasn't wanted here either. Tears were stinging his eyes and he had to swallow back a sob.

"Fine, enjoy your date night," he said bitterly.

"We will. Goodnight."

Minho closed the door and Hyunjin was left standing alone in the corridor again. His arms were wrapped defensively across his chest and his throat burned from the effort of trying not to cry. For a few seconds he was glued to the spot: he couldn't face going back to his empty room, and the pack nest would feel even worse with only him in it.

Eventually he couldn't hold back his sobs any longer and he clapped a hand over his mouth and ran downstairs, ending up out on the balcony that overlooked the garden. He shut the door behind him so that no-one would hear (not that any of them gave a shit about him anyway) then collapsed to the wooden floorboards, curled up into a ball and cried his heart out.

[hoeratius]

okay, asking this question is maybe the dumbest i've ever felt bc it feels like there should be a straightforward, obvious answer here, but every time i've tried to look it up, i've found nothing but pages upon pages of what feels like people talking in circles and only serving to make me more confused in the end. since you're the most knowledgable person i follow when it comes to the Classics, i figured this might be a good place to ask and maybe get an actual answer? (that being said, it's fine if you don't want to/don't have the time to answer this! obviously!!)

where can i read about the older greek myths? as in pre-trojan war. mostly, i'm interested in theseus but also just pre-trojan war stories in general. i know not everything got the iliad/odyssey treatment and there's probably not any surviving text to point at in a lot of cases, but there must've been something. every time i try to look up where to read about the history of theseus, i'm being directed to a bunch of modern retellings, but google has gotten so bad as a search engine, i literally cannot find anything about the origins of this thing everybody's retelling

from what i understand, theseus was sort of everywhere sticking his nose in everything at all times, so i'm not asking for a comprehensive timeline of his whackass life and everything he ever appeared in or anything, but if you could point me in the direction of anything about him--actual plays or academic texts, anything like that--that's more credible than, like, a self-published, self-described "bold new reimagining" with a stock image of a dude in party city roman cosplay as the cover, it would be MUCH appreciated 😭

(again, sorry about how... basic this question is i guess lol? i'm very new to classics in general and still pretty ignorant about everything, so it's EXTREMELY likely that this is a very dumb question with a very obvious answer, but thank you regardless!)

Hello! What an exciting ask (and apologies for my excited and maybe incoherent answer)!

Since you seem to be most interested in Theseus, I’ll use him as an example but much of this can be applied to other Greek heroes/myths/stories more generally.

As you noted, few get the Iliad/Odyssey treatment. In fact, even Achilles and Odysseus don’t, considering the Iliad spans only 7 weeks or so, and the Odyssey misses out on Odysseus’s actions before and during the Trojan War, and after he came home – and he did a lot after he came home. So where to go to find all the other stories that happened?

Some things to keep in mind:

Writers assumed their audience was familiar with the hero’s greatest deeds already

The big boys – Achilles, Odysseus, Theseus, Perseus, Heracles, Oedipus – had their stories shared in many formats. Think of the Parthenon metopes, which show Theseus’s key deeds in sculpture, or vases, hymns, public performances, bedtime stories, etc. People would encounter these often enough that the outlines of these heroes’ stories were known to them from a young age.

One of the Metopes of the Parthenon, showing (probably) Athena and Theseus.

As a result, ancient texts never show the entire story; they select the moment they want to tell and focus in on that. Hence the Iliad focuses on Achilles’s wrath, the Odyssey emphasises his homecoming, and the Argonautica tells the story of the Golden Fleece. Similarly, tragedies will choose a meaningful moment: not all of Agamemnon and Clytemnestra’s struggles, but his return home in the Agamemnon, or the events that lead directly to Pentheus’s dismemberment in the Bakchai.

So finding one text that will give you a useful overview will be hard!

These heroes are often also connected to so many other famous characters, that sometimes they show up as a side character in their stories, so it depends on which stories capture your interest most.

Pre-Homeric texts are few and far between

But this is not to say there aren’t pre-Trojan-War myths!

There are loads! Anything with Heracles or Theseus is pre-Iliadic, and others, like the house of Pelops, link more to the Trojan War but are also separate from it. Plus, there is Hesiod’s Theogony (roughly contemporary with Homer), which tells of the births of the gods and goes all the way back to the start of the universe.

The Ovid situation

Many Greek texts are lost, and we’ve only got allusions to this or that part of the myth in the existing fragments, etc. etc. So how do we still know so much about so many of these stories?

Enter my fave: Ovid.

Far later than Homer (1st century versus 8th century BC), but with access to all the Greek texts and them some, he wrote a lot of fairly comprehensive stories. These include the Heroides, letters written from the perspective of female characters trying to connect to their male lovers, with letter 10 coming from Ariadne to Theseus, and Metamorphoses 8 with parts of Theseus’s story.

If you’re looking for a high-level overview of what was what in ancient myth, starting with the Metamorphoses will give you all the big boys and many of the smaller ones.

Theseus specifically:

I must admit that Theseus is not my strong suit, but sources I’m familiar with that I would recommend:

Hippolytus, by Euripides and Phaedra by Seneca: these both tell of Theseus’s second wife Phaedra falling for his son Hippolytus and causing his death

Catullus 64: A lament from Ariadne after Theseus has abandoned her on Naxos

Metamorphoses 8, 12, by Ovid: Snippets of Theseus’s life, incl the Minotaur

Ones I’m not as familiar with but might be up your street:

Life of Theseus, Plutarch: a historian/scholar’s biography. He had them in pairs, where he compared the two; Theseus is linked to Romulus

The Argonautica, Apollonius Rhodus: Follows Jason in his quest for the Golden Fleece; Theseus is one of his heroes

Oedipus at Colonnus, Sophocles: apparently Theseus is a major side character here but I don’t remember!

There is also The King must Die by Mary Renault, a modern retelling from the ‘80s that blew me away. The only book set in ancient Greece I’ve ever read that doesn’t shy away from how alien their culture and values are to us today and doesn’t try to sugarcoat things.

And if you’re looking for more heroes: Wikipedia is your friend!

The Classics-related pages are pretty reliable, and they often mention the main sources per character.  

I hope this gets you started but please do hit me up with more questions, I always love diving into these things!

[anxious-cosplayer]

"Merry Christmas, Captain" (Head Engineer!Mark x reader)

Word count: 1.6k Warnings: guilt, anxious captain, mentions of death Reader is captain and gender neutral.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

It was hard during the holidays on the Invincible II. Most people either had to leave their family back on earth or were still in cryostasis. So it only meant that the crew could celebrate together.

However, to most people - yourself included - the crew was family. There were bits of tinsel that covered doorway entrances, Christmas trees decorated by each department, and Celci had to tell Mark that he couldn’t use the cryo room as a place to have a snowball fight as “that’s not how it works!”

You can probably guess how Mark felt about that.

Though the crew were gathering in the mess hall to have a big Christmas dinner, you didn’t really know if you should turn up. As much as you enjoyed everyone being together, this time of the year made you reflect on what had happen in all of those other universes. The guilt was slowly becoming better to deal with, especially after talking it over with Mark many times until it was late, however it was occasions like this you did find it hard to cope.

So that’s is why you’re stuck in your room doing paperwork, preparing to go to the bridge to supervise the running of the ships systems while everyone could have a break. Donning your hat and signature gloves, you took your tablet and promptly made your way there. As you walked by all the decorations you thought you should’ve maybe added something somewhat Christmas-y to your uniform but it was too late now. The door whooshes open to the bridge.

There was about four or five people in there monitoring the various systems. They all stood to attention when you walk in. You recognise all of them as members of several different departments. You smile somewhat awkwardly and nod your head in acknowledgment.

“At ease everyone.” They all relax from their previously stiff stances. “You can call go down to the dining hall for your dinners, I’ll look after things up here. Dismissed.”

They crew have big smiles on their faces but then quickly leave, thanking you as they do. Only one, Tyler, pauses.

“Are you sure, Captain? I don’t mind helping out here. Don’t wanna leave you here all alone.” He gives you a warm smile. You pause. It would be nice to have the company, but it wouldn’t be fair to have only him stay behind. He was probably just being polite anyway.

“No thank you, Tyler. I’d hate for you to miss out on the festivities. Go enjoy yourself,” you smile at him, but it felt forced. You didn’t really want to be here by yourself, but you couldn’t stand seeing all the happy faces of those you’ve probably killed over and over again in other universes. Tyler hesitates but nods in respect before leaving. The doors whooshed close behind them.

And then you were alone, staring out into deep space.

-_-_-_-

Tyler had picked up on the face that his Captain wasn’t doing great, but he wasn’t sure why. He assumed it was probably because they didn’t have their family with them. Thankfully, he knew just the person that would help cheer the captain up.

-_-_-_-

Vitals: Normal

ADS: Normal

Cryo: Normal

Reactor: Normal

Warp Core: N/A

Well at least that’s always what it’s said since the start of the voyage, minus the hiccup in the middle. After doing the necessary checks and selecting the correct buttons on the data pad, you wondered back over to the window. It was times like this you were happy that Mark had installed all of these windows, despite the issues they caused in other universes.

Your eyes slowly refocus on your own reflection. The bags under your eyes were a little more puffy than usual. Sleep was hard to get sometimes. But you could also see the Christmas tree's lights next to the control panel. Your thoughts drift back to some of your favourite holiday moments. Times with close family or friends. People who you haven’t seen in a very, very long time. Maybe… just maybe… this could be the moment you let yourself give into the Christmas spirit?

“Computer! Play something Christmas-y.”

The computer pauses before you start to hear a quiet version of one of your favourite Christmas songs. You smile to yourself before you suddenly hear the whoosh of the door opening. You quickly compose yourself and turn to see the Head Engineer walk through the door holding two drinks.

“Captain! There you are! I was wondering wher- … oh god what’s wrong? Are you ok?” He quickly rushes over, balancing the drinks on the control panel. You’re confused before you realise a few stray tears had fallen down your cheeks.

“Oh… I’m okay, Mark. Don’t worry about me,” you say as you wipe the tears away. “What are you doing here? I gave everyone the time off.”

Mark sheepishly rubbed his neck. “Yeah, I know, but I was hoping that by everyone you’d mean yourself included.” He offers one of the drinks to you. “I even brought one to share with you, captain.”

You glance over and hesitate. “well, I’m technically still on duty.” But one reassuring smile from Mark had you reaching over to accept the drink. You clink glasses together and stare out into space together.

“Why are you alone up here Captain? I-…We all would love to have you down there,” he corrected. You sigh and take a sip of your drink. It was very fizzy but light with a fruity aftertaste. Quite pleasant.

“I don’t know if I could see them all happy. Not after seeing the other thems. I doesn’t…feel right, I suppose.”

“Well you still have the right to enjoy yourself too.” Silence then fills the room. He puts a hand on your shoulder. “Look, myself and the other heads of departments have a surprise for you. Just… indulge us, please?”

You mull it over in your head before giving a nod. You walk together out of the room. As you walk down the hallway together you accidentally brush hands. You tried not to make the blush on your face obvious but feeling your heart jolt like that didn’t help. Eventually, you both make your way to the mess hall and the door whooshes open.

You see all of the other heads wearing various Christmas themed outfits, holding wrapped parcels and with big smiles on all of their faces - even Burt has a soft smile.

“Captain! You’re finally here! You can open this now!” Celci runs up to you while wearing her elf outfit and hands you a beautifully wrapped box with a big blue bow on top of it. You’re quickly ushered to sit down and start opening your present. You tear away at the wrapping to find a beautiful pair of gloves. They were very similar to the ones you were wearing but they had the softest insides to them. And stitched into the inside were your initials. These must’ve been custom made, possibly by Celci herself. You thank her profusely.

Burt had a simple Santa hat on and passed you a little box with some ribbon. You untie it and inside it is a keychain. It was a replica of the ones to drive the ship, but this one had miniatures of a wrench, an ice cube, a pistol, a hammer, a captain’s hat and even a mini Invincible II.

“It’s important to always keep those important close at hand,” he states. You smile at the gift and thank him. For once, this bit of wisdom from him did not freak you out.

Gunther was next. He wasn’t wearing anything different to his normal clothes (“It’s Die Hard! It’s a Christmas film!) but it was clear that someone, probably Celci, had put a snowman beanie on his head. He passes you something that seemed to be wrapped in foil. It was a custom made silver blaster that had your name engraved into the handle.

“For when you need protection exploring the new planet!” Though it did seem very excessive, he did reassure you it had a stun mode on it. You thanked him too.

Then various members of the rest of the crew came over to wish you merry Christmas and in the end you even got dragged to the theatre room to watch some of the classic Christmas films. Mark and Celci got into another one of their fights (Mark wanted to watch The Grinch Who Stole Christmas but Celci was determined to watch White Christmas). But in the end the crew took a vote and watched both of them and one or two others too.

It was getting very late and you were just about ready to go and sleep when someone tugged your hand. You looked to see it was none other than Mark.

“Come with me.”

You both promptly slip away from the party. He leads you to a quiet hallway and oddly stops you in one of the archways.

“I, uh, wanted to give you my present.”

“Mark you didn’t have to-" you try to say but then he put a finger over your lips, silencing you. He then points upwards, and you follow your finger to then see there was something hanging from the ceiling. Mistletoe.

Oh.

Oh.

You glance back at him. He waits to see if you were okay with what was about to happen. You nod and both of your lips gently brush against other while he embraces you. He gently pulls away and you can feel him smile as he whispered, “merry Christmas, Captain.”

Maybe Christmas wasn’t too bad after all.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Merry Christmas everyone!! I hope you all liked this short story just in time for Christmas! I hope you are all safe and I will see you guys (hopefully) in the new year - Anx :)

[kaeyapilled]

hey! your kaeya takes are so real!!! I was wondering if you had any good fic recs?? I want to read something that has good kaeya characterization (+bonus if it's ragbros that isn't just them crying and hugging it out like you were talking about) and am tired of scrolling through tags

!! omg thank you im so honored to hear that people like my takes lol

fic recs huh!! i have some!! do you mind it if most of them are about child kaeya? (i hadnt realized how many of my bookmarks focused on his childhood until i went through them all lmao) hopefully it isnt all stuff youve already read before! here goes:

A Horse Makes for a Stable Life by FollowerofMercy – Wanting to test the boundaries of his host’s goodwill, Kaeya asks for a pony for his birthday. He didn’t expect Crepus to deliver. Or, the story in which things get uncomfortably real for young Kaeya.

do you like kaeya and crepus interactions!! because this fic explores their dynamic in suuuuch a nice way that felt very refreshing to see portrayed!! perfect ratio of hurt to comfort in my opinion. overall quite lighthearted compared to my other recs though lol. good exploration of kaeyas inner conflict since a young age. yeah i love it and recommend it

I'm gonna miss your love when it's gone by imaginarypasta – A selection of scenes from Kaeya's childhood related to his relationships with his fathers, and all they have led him to be.

this one is so good!!!! i feel like its rare to see kaeyas biological father portrayed as anything other than a heartless asshole, and this fic explored kaeyas relationship with him in such a nice manner that makes for a very melancholic and. i guess bittersweet story that takes into consideration the nuance of the situation in a way that i really dont see super often. the parts about kaeyas relationship w crepus are also really well done i love it. oh and the khaenri'ah lore the author takes some liberty with is really really interesting!!

not bad for a walk on death's doorstep by b_attery – Fear is a knife’s edge. Fear is a killer. Fear is how you know you’re still alive.

my bookmark of this work said "literally the best kaeya character study ive ever read" and honestly i still stand by that. the word flow is great and the exploration of fear as such an intrinsic part of kaeya's life and as the driving force for most of his actions and feelings and responses. it's so good!!! this one contemplates kaeyas childhood both before and after his arrival in mondstadt and goes until after diluc's return. absolutely recommend it!!

Hundred-Watt Light by pepperjuice – A story about ten years of contingency plans and holding your own hand. (Because how else are you supposed to live with a weight too big to hold all alone?)

this. this rewired my brain forever. this holds the title of best kaeya character study ever along with the previous one i talked about. definitely mind the tags because it primarily deals with suicidal ideation and thoughts so, if that's a trigger then it's best to not read this one lol but still it is SO good and it explores kaeya's inner conflicts and awful coping mechanisms after having such a heavy burden thrusted upon him at an extremely early age with no good support of any kind. i absolutely love this fic it's very dear to me and i think about it sooo often it truly altered my brain chemistry

things fall apart by kernsing – Happy eighteenth, Diluc.

finally some ragbros content! sadly it isnt the reconciliation you asked for it's about when things fell apart. this is one of my favorite ever renditions of how it all went down on That Day - it reshaped some of my own headcanons, actually. this one is more from diluc's pov than kaeya's, and it's written really really well, and explores diluc's grief over his father's death in SUCH an amazing and interesting way!! and the way it parallels kaeya's own emotions and that is exactly what causes them to fight is extremely tasty i loved it. read it it's good

okay i can probably find some more but this is enough for one post i think. deeply sorry for not delivering the good ragbros reconciliation content.. i tbh haven't gathered a lot.. but i hope you and whoever else reads this enjoys these! thank you for the ask <3

[inacatastrophicmind]

Suptober23, day 2: Pumpkin Patch

Dean closed his eyes for a moment, enjoying the feeling of the autumn breeze caressing his face. He could swear the air carried a hint of cinnamon, which probably came from the stall at the entrance of the pumpkin patch, the one that seemed to sell all types of hot beverages. Dean guessed that once they were done picking pumpkins, Cas would like for the two of them to grab a cup of whatever picked their interest and sit down somewhere quiet.

Speaking of Cas, he was kneeling in front of two medium sized pumpkins that in Dean’s opinion looked almost exactly the same, but Cas was just giving them an intense look, trying to decide which one he liked the most, as if this was an important decision. But that was just how Cas was. It didn’t matter if the choice consisted on stopping an apocalypse or selecting one pumpkin or another; Cas still felt that both tasks were important. In different ways, of course, but still important.

It was one of the many things Dean loved about Cas. Even if sometimes it meant having to stand on his feet for more than five minutes while he waited for his husband to pick a pumpkin.

“You are fidgeting,” Cas said, without taking his eyes from the pumpkins. Dean hadn’t realized he had started bouncing his leg, but Cas had. “You can go around the patch looking for other pumpkins if you like.”

“Nah, it ain’t the same without you by my side,” Dean admitted, which made Cas smile. “But just promise me that you aren’t gonna have me waiting for another thirty minutes every time you wanna pick up a pumpkin.”

Cas rolled his eyes, a little bit too dramatically. “It hasn’t been thirty minutes.”

“Sure feels like it.”

Cas turned his face to glare Dean, who was giving him a teasing grin. Cas shook his head in exasperation, but on his lips, Dean could clearly see the hint of a smile.

Finally, Cas picked a pumpkin and stood up before carefully depositing it into the wheelbarrow. It was only the second one they had picked, and neither of them had any idea of how many pumpkins they wanted, only that they wanted some.

As Dean lifted the wheelbarrow to keep moving, Cas linked his arm with Dean’s, and then they began to walk forward, pressed together.

“Alright, any place that catches your eye?” Dean asked, taking a quick look around.

“Let’s go to where the white pumpkins are,” Cas answered, pointing to their left. “I saw some photos of painted white pumpkins on a magazine and I would like to try that.”

“Okay,” Dean said. He couldn’t help but grin at how excited Cas was about decorating pumpkins.

Frowning, Cas tilted his face to the side to look at Dean. “Did I say something amusing?”

Dean chuckled. “No, it’s just that I like how excited you’re about this whole thing, you know?”

Cas simply smiled.

“But also, I’m kind of thinking about how irritated Heaven would’ve been if they had seen you partaking in this pagan tradition. I’m pretty sure they would’ve been fucking furious.”

“I’m quite certain that they would have been more furious about me marrying you. Or perhaps about how many times we make love,” Cas deadpanned, and even thought Dean agreed, he couldn’t help but blush. “Going to a pumpkin patch is rather innocuous.”

“Yeah, you’ve got a point.”

Cas kissed Dean’s blushed cheek. “You have a rather lovely blush, Dean.”

“Shut up, you sap,” Dean protested, playfully kicking Cas’ leg. The gesture made Cas grin beautifully, and Dean couldn’t help himself, so he leaned into Cas’ lips and kissed him softly, immediately feeling how Cas melted into the kiss. When they pulled away, Cas was now the one blushing, and Dean said, “Nice blush you’ve got there, Cas.”

The fallen angel rolled his eyes, fondly. “You’re insufferable.”

Laughing brightly, Dean kept rolling the wheelbarrow through the pumpkin patch, taking them to the spot where the white pumpkins awaited. Next to him, Cas smiled brightly and held onto Dean tighter.

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

re: The ASL post

Surely I can't be the only one questioning the premise that if you shut down in one language, you shut down in all of them, equally?

Selective mutism is a whole Thing that exists. There's speech loss where you can somehow take a business call, but can't otherwise converse or ask for help or articulate anything outside of that specific compartmentalized embodiment. There's speech loss where echolalia is still possible. There's dissociation and compartmentalization and codeswitching which allow people to superficially bypass their own brain's shutdowns to produce the results they need.

And then there's the fact that different languages can mean different brainspaces! Thinking in and expressing yourself in language A versus language B can be sooo so so so so different in terms of emotional processing, sensory experience, gender realization, logic formation, etc, and that's even without getting into the root cultural differences. You can be groggy and overstimulated and find solace in a languagespace where you have more resilience, and it does not have to be a regression to a native tongue!

And that's staying within the same language modality! Once you change that, it's extremely possible that triggering conditions like fatigue/exhaustion/overstimulation can be relieved. How many writers have been utter wrecks in crisis while churning out beautifully written works in their non-native language? If a Deaf person has speech loss but can write in legible English during the event, is that marked as physically impossible with the same level of scrutiny?

Meanwhile, my experience with using ASL as someone who was already multilingual (including natively multilingual) before that is that the non-manual markers of the language are so embodied and so different from my natural performance state that of course it requires a different kind of brainspace, it's practically a form of masking except that it relieves the pressure of the other masking (tone, volume, pace, vocabulary, presque vu, cluttering, pitch, and then all those things but with stealth trans gender anxiety).

Also when someone is in crisis, why is it necessary for them to communicate with perfect grammar? What hill even is this?

(In addition, I resent the idea that it's impossible to have intuitive fluency in a language just because you didn't start it as a baby. And the idea that struggling with one parameter of a language will render native users utterly incapable of comprehending you... which is to not even touch the ways in which parameter prescriptivism hurts tactile sign users--*immediately falls through a trap door triggered by the anti-intersectionality police*)

As always, friendo, you speak mine own thoughts to the core, lol

I didn't really feel like getting into every concern I had with the way that post was presenting its conclusions, because I had already written several paragraphs and that felt.....unhelpful at best.

But yeah, I mean. I am not aware of ANY psychological research whatsoever that supports the assumptions they were making about speech/communication loss as an experience, about the way the brain interacts with language, and about the role of learning new languages. It sounded like a LOT of misunderstood moral/ethical arguments being made after hearing someone talk about a small piece of the complexity of Deaf/HoH language/communication sharing with other communities, that they didn't fully know how to apply because they don't actually know anything about the neuroscience of the situation.

Which like. Fine I guess. But that was sort of why I pushed back. I really appreciated the point that sign isn't AAC! I would really like to see that acknowledged more in the way speech/communication disorder folks talk about our interactions with it! And it worried me that the point didn't ACTUALLY seem to be "these things are different so here's the strengths and challenges of each/the outcomes one may hope for with each, so you can better understand how to utilize them" but rather "If you can't be confident that you have fully unlearned your prejudices and assumptions here, you're actually harming Deaf/HoH people by trying to learn our language." That doesn't make sense to me. And when the response was to completely misrepresent my words and ignore my explicitly coming from an intracommunal perspective while literally refusing to actually interact with what was said? That made me feel really uneasy about where that arguement actually was coming from.

One of the things I didn't talk about in the post is that my languages actually get employed in a clear and consistent order as my cognitive functioning decomps. I am "functional" if I can speak and/or write in English. I am "impaired" If I cannot use English, but CAN use Spanish. And I am fully "adrift" if all I can do is sign/use assistive gestures. Literally, what language I am using to communicate is almost always in indicator of my state of mind, to the point that long before I had language for any of this, I warned Wifey ahead of time when we first started dating that I might lapse into Spanish under certain circumstances, and they would need to tell me if they didn't understand because I prolly wouldn't notice. Despite being my "first language" English is genuinely the hardest for me to interact with. This remains true as I learn more languages (German is easier than English too, as is Italian, and even Russian.) English is - by literally every measure - a hot mess of a language. And it is actually really fucking common for even native speakers to find other languages more intuitive.

Why would that suddenly stop being true because your cognition is failing? Yeah, you won't have **the same access** bit you were never going to anyway???? And "more access than zero" is literally invaluable????

I dunno. I know it's poor behavior to get frustrated at people speaking with authority while repeating objective untruths in something I have actual expertise in, but there IS kinda a certain point when I have to wonder why people immediately internalize the stuff they see on tumblr without actually exploring the work of people who pioneered the research someone is attempting to convey? Why are yall happy NEVER interacting with a primary source?

And literally? Don't tell me "well we don't have any intracommunal research!!! Because that hasn't been true in any significant field of study for a decade now. Limited? Sure. Explorations of genuine intracommunal priorities in their infancy? Absolutely. But at this point if we are 30yrs into "nothing for us without us" without being able to recognize that intracommunal knowledge generation has ALWAYS happened, and the problem was not an absence but an obfuscation?

We probably have bigger problems at that point honestly.

[equallyshaw]

ᴅᴀʏ ɴɪɴᴇ: ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ʜᴏᴍᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴍᴇ - ʙʀᴏᴄᴋ ʙᴏᴇꜱᴇʀ

part of holidays with equallyshaw

warnings: swearing.

word count: 2.8k+

takes place over christmas and janurary! not really christmasy but idc lmao.

ʜᴇʀ ʜᴀɪʀ ꜱʟɪᴄᴋᴇᴅ ʙᴀᴄᴋ in a tight bun, her black dress clung to her irresistible curves and her free spirit is what caught broody brock boeser's attention, on this cold snow-free evening in vancouver. abba music pounded throughout the club, as divya 'viv' screamed the lyrics with her longtime uni friends. viv had just graduated this semester after 5 long years at uni of british columbia and she was more than ecstatic to raise some hell this weekend before heading home to toronto. after her 5 years in bc, she had no reason to stay on this side of canada so she was going to head home before heading to new york- hunting for a position on wall street.

brock watched as the dark haired girl danced and spun around with her friends, and felt the hair on his very neck raise. him and viv or 'vivian' as he called her, had hooked up many, many times over the course of her time on the west coast. it never led to anything, despite her giving him false hope. despite, them being exclusive to one another during the season. and him being faithful to her during the offseason - though she didnt know.

one of her friends since freshman year was on her way back from the bar, when she spotted some of the canucks. she rolled her eyes, slipping through people to get back to her group. "you'd never guess who's here tonight!" maya boomed and the girls all looked at her before shrugging. she then turned towards viv and viv felt a wave of guilt wash over. she had really like brock as a person, and hated toying with his emotions but she had told her self and her parents had too, that she couldn't date anybody while in school. her parents were pretty strict parents, but were leniant in other ways. "good god." she hummed, throwing back a shot of tequila to which she shut her eyes quickly, as the burning sensation died down. "he really did a number on ya, huh?" ginny another girl had teased while poking her elbow, "yeah for sure." viv lied. oh, he had in the most innocent of ways. but she had done it worse, breaking his heart over and over again.

❅

it was a while later when one of her friends sasha made her ways over toward elias, which then meant the two groups were bound to converse with one another. and as luck would have it, brock and viv found themselves close to one another. in proximity ofcourse, but viv didn't dare look at him. brock made a peace offering about 30 minutes later, holding out a cup of vodka cranberry and she knew she couldn't resist the free drink. she swiped it from him giving him a small smile, giving him a small nod. "how have you need davya?" he questioned, and she almost choked as he said her full name. "uh good! just graduated so im glad to be free of this place." she mused, sipping her drink. he nodded, "well that's great, congratulations!" he said smiling widely, a genuine smile was evident. she smiled back, the one that he had seen many, many times and he felt himself blush.

"still planning on wall street?" he questioned, and she nodded. "don't you know it. its not too far from home that my parents wont need to complain, but far enough where i feel like i can be my own person and find my own way." she said shrugging. he nodded, taking it all in. he hadn't said five words to her since may, and he had been dying to talk to her since then. "i always used to say that if vancouver didn't select me, i wanted to go to new york. something about it made me feel alive. if that makes sense." he said rambling a bit, and she could tell he felt embarrassed. "oh ofcourse! i totally get that...that's why im a sucker for it." she said whispering that last part and the two of their gazes connected. viv felt her chest begin to heat up, and the return of the familiar longing for him was evident.

he moved in closer to her, "maybe ill have to come visit you vivian." he mused, words and breath heavy on her neck. she felt herself shudder with pleasure, and looked at how close their faces were to each other. she grinned before leaning in and kissing him. he wrapped his arms around her back and pulled her in closer. they pulled away after a few seconds, "would it be crazy to ask you to come back to my place? again?" he questioned and she giggled, "thought you'd never ask...take me home." she whispered, with a cunning smirk on her face.

❅

two days later she woke up with an arm draped across her torso and chest, as her back was pressed into the mattress. she looked over and saw brock's familiar and luscious blond locks and smiled, rubbing small circles on his arm that was draped. god, she really needed to leave she thought. she had to catch a flight to toronto..but she didn't want to leave. being with brock felt right, it felt real and felt like home. though, her toxic side would never admit that. if she didn't get home, she'd hear so much from it. especially if she missed christmas and christmas eve. she felt the bed shift a bit, before brock rested his chin on her shoulder. she looked down, as she met his longing gaze. "morning vivian." he said softly, before she leaned in and kissed him. "morning brock." she hummed.

"whatcha thinkin about?" he questioned, pressing a kiss to her shoulder before exploring along her chest and neck. she softly moaned before he was now on top of her, and she had her hands wrapped in his hair. "just how my parents would kill me if i didn't make my flight tomorrow..but i shamelessly don't want to leave." she said shrugging and not daring to look at him. "whys that?" he said coyly, beginning to pepper her with kisses. she sighed, "because then they'd have the guy that they're forcing me to marry come find me. and like i don't want that." she said as if it was nothing. his eyebrows crinkled, as he froze. "sorry for this cockblock of a conversation." she said sitting up and he quickly moved off of her, as she wrapped around the throw blanket on the chair, next to the bed.

she wrapped her self and went to grab her phone from the kitchen where'd she had left it. "what do you mean, like an arranged marriage?" he questioned as she was about to leave. "yes." was all she said before walking out and then walked back in as quickly. "i don't want to be tied down to somebody that i don't love and especially not this quick after graduation, but they don't care." she said dropping the blanket, and bent down to grab her clothes.

"thats why you never wanted to be together, like be together for real." brock said putting the words together. she nodded. "she sighed, slipping on her underwear and jeans, her long locks draping over her chest. she turned back towards him, "that's why i kept breaking your heart...and mine." she said, the latter being softer. he stood up, and walked over towards her as she threw on her faux leather jacket. "what? you've liked me this whole time? just as much as i did?" he questioned and she scoffed, "well obviously brock, why do you think I've come back for the past 5 years almost? even if it crushed me saying no and leaving, you-you drew me back in and i loved our time together, even if it meant breaking my heart each time." she exclaimed, buttoning up her jacket. she looked up at brock, once she finished.

he stood in front of her and gave her a sad smile, and she hated it. she hated this look that he did whenever she broke things off, and would say no. "i keep hurting you, why do you keep holding on to hope, huh?" she exasperated. "because i love you! cant you see that!" he said raising his voice, acting as if viv didn't feel the same way. or as if she didn't see it.

"that will never be enough, brock! never!" she said running her hands through her hair. she sniffled, "that will never be enough and has never. its never been enough to be able to call off my wedding that as far as i know is in a few months. you're never gonna be enough for me, and i -i cant do anything about it." she said through tears, watching so many emotions flash through his blue eyes. he shook his head, "you're love will never be enough for me, and my love will never be enough to set me free." she said softer, and he titled his head just a bit at that; and his face dawned a pleading look. she shook her head, "im sorry brock." she said before walking out.

❅

it was janurary 20th, and she was heading into scotiabank with her older cousin and her husband. she had been living with her cousin for the month almost, after she told her parent's she needed time away from them. she told them that she couldn't go through with the marriage, and obviously they were not too pleased with her. they berated her and believed that she was bringing shame to the family. she said she was leaving, no matter their thoughts or feelings. once she had come back from vancouver, her older cousin sought it all out of her. her cousin absolutely adored the fact, that she had been seeing brock for almost 5 years. her cousin secretly wished that the two would somehow find each other again.

the two sat down in the club seats, and watched the players just beginning to take the ice for period 1. her husband handed over two beers, and viv quickly chugged half of it. "have you spoken to him..at all?" she questioned and viv shook her head. "nope." she sighed, quickly finding brock as he took his spot on the blue line for the anthem. she stood along with the rest of the arena, and listened to the anthem but through it all, she flashed back to all the times her and brock spent together. throughout the game she could not take her eyes off of the blonde-eyed beauty, that she had come to love. god, how she missed him.

at some point during period three with the two teams tied, the arena decided they would begin a segment on the jumbotron for 'kiss cam.' and ofcourse, her and cousins husband would be shown on the camera, despite there being a seat in between them empty. the girl next to her tapped her and pointed up, viv was terrified. she shook her head, a flash of fear in her eyes. the camera still did not move, and her cousins husband put his face in his hand, not believing that this was happening. the camera then moved away, and viv sighed a sigh of relief.

the camera flashed back to viv and her cousin's husband and they shook their heads again, and ofourse the crowd was eating this all up and the teams began to watch as well. brock looked up and felt his heart drop to his stomach, this couldn't be happening he thought. he looked away at the exact moment that her cousin came back and kissed him passionately in front of the crowd. the crowd, hooting and hollering. viv's cheeks heated up when her cousin laughed, sitting down back between them. "that was fun." she mused as viv rolled her eyes.

❅

two hours later, with a vancouver overtime win; coming from the princess himself, viv found herself, her cousin and her husband at the soho house bar. after about an hour of being there, she saw some of the vancouver canucks waltz in. she sighed, finishing her cranberry vodka and decided to call it a night. "no im gonna get a taxi, ill see you back at the condo." she said getting up, and began her dissent towards the front. she passed the team, with brock quickly recognizing the shade of dark brown hair from anywhere. he followed her out, and saw her waiting at the pickup area.

"vivian!" she heard to the right of where she was standing and she felt tears prick her eyes, once she realized it was him. "brock we cant do this here." she said as her uber pulled up, "then take me wherever you're going." he said confidently. she looked towards the uber and the grabbed ahold of his hand pulling him with her. "are we going home?" he questioned, "ill introduce myself." he added quickly and she sighed. "no, i left home once i came back. been staying with my cousin aditi or adi and her husband." she said leaning back into the seat. he watched the tension dissipate just a bit, and then took ahold of her hand that was resting on her thigh. he pulled it closer to him and rubbed her thumb softly. she looked towards him, and saw the look he had made her swoon these past years.

"come on." she huffed, pulling him out of the uber and up towards the condo. she opened it up quickly, and walked in and opening the door wider for him. she sat down her purse on the table near the door, and watched as brock took in the condo. the condo featured so much of her culture, yet it was modern and so different from other family members' homes. especially her parents.

"you left home?" he questioned softly, and she saw that it was laced with concern. "yeah my parents told me that this guy that they had been planning for me to marry, was gonna be making an appearance soon and i said no. i told them that if they went through with this, that'd they would be losing me. that i would not go through with it. id rather lose everything i own and have if it means ill be happy or have a chance to be. i had even made calls to my best friends in vancouver but my cousin said that i can come here first. and stay as long as i needed to." she said shrugging and pulling a bottle of water from the fridge. "want one?" she questioned and he nodded, taking one from her.

"she too never went through with her arranged marriage, and she's been able create her dream life and with the husband of her dreams." she said smiling softly, "who was sitting next to you tonight?" he questioned, and she nodded. he silently cursed himself and she saw his red cheeks. she shook her head, "all good brock. seriously. you had no idea based on what our last conversation was. i would have thought the same thing." viv said trying to soften the blow.

"i have spent the past 5 years absolutely head over heals for you and i would absolutely shoot myself in the foot if i didn't even attempt to mend or not even mend, but give us a chance." she paused as brock looked over at her. a sliver of hope coursing through his veins.

"i would be a fool not to at least attempt to explore my feelings and whatever it is between us. officially, that is." she said but looked away when he didn't say anything. he was just too stunned to say a word, he couldn't believe that the girl of his dreams who is a firecracker, kind, poised and absolute breathtaking would be now saying this. that she finally had the opportunity to explore this.

"really?" he choked out and she looked back at him. she nodded and he moved closer to her so now he was directly in front of her, and pulling a stray hair behind her ear. "pinky promise." she grinned, holding out her pinky. he looked down at it quickly, before looking back into her brown eyes.

pinky promises were their thing, it is what they said when the other was being serious. they'd come up with it after hooking up a few times her freshman year, and it stuck.

"pinky promise, b." she said and he smiled back, pulling hers and his pinky together.

they pulled away, and he wrapped his arms around her back while hers found his neck. they rested their foreheads against each others, taking in this moment together. because they didn't know how long they would go without seeing each other. well mostly viv.

but brock had other plans, "come home with me." he offered and she opened her eyes to find his already looking at her. "what?" she questioned in disbelief but also wanted him to say it again.

he smiled widely, pulling her as close as possible before speaking again. "come home with me." he stated, and she smiled softly. and not even a beat later, "take me home b." she smiled before he pulled her in for a long and deep kiss.

"oh! and can we celebrate christmas, i got you a gift.." she said pulling apart, and he grinned. "you and you're timing but yes, id love to spend christmas with you." he mused before kissing her once more.

hope you all enjoyed! pls like and reblog, if u did (:

tags: @cuttergauthier @jayda12 @toasttt11 @jackhues @dancerbailey3

[punsmaster69]

5/OCT/20XX

mettaton's hosting some sort of way-too-early halloween party. says he was inspired by yesterday.

normally i wouldn't go, but papyrus and tori said i should go with them.

——

[The handwriting from this point on gets progressively worse.]

paps doesn't want to wear his main halloween costume more than once, so he's a vampire for today.

——

oh.

undyne is picking up alphys. not like, from the party.

from the floor, into the air over her head.

she must be pretty drunk.

not undyne, i mean that alphys must be to agree to that.

that's just normal undyne.

——

i'm beginning to suspect mettaton only threw this party to promote his new alcoholic drinks line.

tori tried one of the mettaton-branded drinks. her face scrunched up reflexively.

papyrus tried one sip and exclaimed,

"THIS TASTES LIKE ALCOHOL!!"

"not wrong, there."

"NO, THE ..MEDICINAL KIND. THE KIND MS. TORIEL USES WHEN FRISK SCRAPES THEIR KNEE! HYPRO.. SOMETHING."

"hydrogen peroxide?"

"YES, HYDRATED PER ROCKS-SIDE!"

"close enough."

i took the glass from papyrus and downed it.

"...."

"it does taste how peroxide smells."

"ALMOST PERFECTLY!"

"gross."

——

aside from mettaton's branded ones, the drinks selection was pretty good. someone knows their wines.

——

papyrus keeps hovering around me, checking if i'm awake. i know i fell asleep early yesterday, so i guess he's worried.

——

he came up to me just now and felt my forehead for some reason.

"...STAY RIGHT THERE!"

papyrus is now running up to toriel. couldn't hear what he was saying, but his hand gestures seem to indicate something about my temperature.

...

i do feel a bit warm. guess it's pretty hot in here.

——

with papyrus in tow, toriel approached me.

tori looks.. so nice tonight.

black is a better her colour on her than she thinks.

tori sat in the seat next to me, and papyrus sat across from me.

"Sans, have you had much to drink?"

i glanced at the empty cups next to me.

"..haven't been keepin' track, to be honest."

she leaned over to see how many cups there were, eyes widening.

"You look so sober!"

"HE'S SMILING TOO MUCH TO BE!"

"Is that not his resting expression..?"

"THIS IS A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT KIND OF SMILE!!"

she leaned in to look at me.

"IT'S A DIFFERENT ONE NOW!"

i covered my face with my hands.

"Ah! Are we staring too much? I apologize."

i could feel papyrus continuing to stare at me, as if waiting for something.

"JUST NOW! NORMALLY SANS WOULD HAVE SOME SORT OF WITTY REMARK, BUT HE'S QUIET!!"

"That is true..."

"......"

i opened my hands, showing my face again.

"boo."

papyrus's focused expression turned to one of partial concern and partial irritation.

she giggled and put a hand to my head.

"Perhaps you 𝘢𝘳𝘦 a bit tipsier than you first appear."

she gasped.

"His face..!"

"HE GOT... BLUE-ER."

she leaned in again to look at my face.

"IT GOT WORSE!!"

covering my face again, i leaned my head against toriel's.

"...you smell pretty."

she didn't say anything.

"MS. TORIEL, YOU'RE CHANGING COLOR TOO! IS COLOR-CHANGING CONTAGIOUS??"

tori pulled away.

"N-no, it is alright. I also had a few drinks, so perhaps I am a bit drunk."

"..Sans? Surely you do not plan to keep your face covered all night?"

gently moving my hands to the sides of my skull, tori kept her hands on mine.

"I do not mind if you are feeling a bit..𝘣𝘭𝘶𝘦."

"..Or if you keep getting blue-er."

"....."

keeping my eyes locked with hers, i couldn't help marveling.

dark red is.. really beautiful..

"I GUESS THIS MEANS WE'RE GOING HOME EARLY."

the dark red disappeared from my view.

"How come?"

"SANS IS OBVIOUSLY DRUNK. HE SHOULD LAY DOWN, RIGHT?"

fuzzy hands still on my face, i closed my eyes to bask in the warmth.

"He will be alright to stay for a while as long as he doesn't have more."

"Papyrus.. If you would like to go enjoy the party, I would not mind keeping an eye on him."

"IF YOU SAY SO, MS. TORIEL, THEN I TRUST YOU. SANS.. STAY WITH MS. TORIEL."

"mhm."

i heard the tapping of papyrus' heels slowly get farther away until it was just me and tori at the table.

"Are you still feeling alright?"

she started to move her hands away, but i pulled them back without thinking.

i quickly let go.

"If you are cold, I can ask Mettaton if he has a blanket."

...

how do i explain..

"it's different."

"... Different?"

"you.. you're warmer."

"...Then,"

tori moved her chair right next to mine.

"is this better?"

she gently pulled me backwards so that my skull rested in her lap.

my face suddenly felt hot.

quickly sitting upright and pulling my hood over my head, i stuttered out

"t-"

"too warm-"

and rushed to the nearest bathroom to close myself in.

——

a couple minutes went by before i heard a knock on the door.

"...Are you alright, Sans?"

"i'm going by just sans these days."

it was stupid, but she liked it anyways.

giggling, tori knocked twice on the door.

"Knock knock!"

"who's there?"

"An old lady."

"old lady who?"

"I did not know you knew how to yodel!"

couldn't help but laugh. me laughing made her laugh too, which made us both laugh even harder.

i don't know how long we sat there, laughing and telling jokes through a door.

i opened the door enough to look at her.

sat on the floor on the other side, tori peeked through at me as well.

doing what i wish we could've done before, tori opened the door the rest of the way. entering into the same side of the door as me, she closed it behind her.

"It is much cooler in here."

"you make it hotter."

"...wait-"

"i-i meant. body temperature."

tori gave a smirk.

"So you think my body is the hottest?"

"would you mind if i borrowed some warmth?"

tori pulled me into her arms.

embracing me, she held my skull close to her chest.

i felt the heat returning to my face, but i remained still.

——

quietly enjoying the feeling of other's weight in our arms, i felt that fluttering in my chest again.

"tori.."

i quickly sat up onto my knees, looking her in the eyes.

...i then completely lost my balance.

"Try to not get up so fast..!"

hugging me once more to stop my fall, she asked,

"..Would you like to try and say it again?"

[The page abruptly stops. The handwriting returns to normal on the next page.]

suddenly i found myself lacking the spine to say anything at all.

"......"

"Perhaps it is time for you to go home."

not being able to say anything, i only held tighter onto her.

she carried me out of the bathroom like i weighed nothing. tori then let papyrus know we were leaving.

..can't remember anything else.

[silvervioletvalentine]

🖤!¡He really should’ve known better ¡!🖤

Pairing: Mick Schumacher x Cherrie . + Quinn Hughes x Cherrie.

Word count: 6k

Summary : if only he knew then, what he knew now. Maybe it wouldn’t have hurt so much to realise that he really should have seen this coming.

Or: unrequited loves really sucks. And that’s just it.

Warnings + A/N : pure angst baby (for mick at least).

Hope you guys like this. Had to include my fav hockey player just to make myself feel better , a mix of my two worlds colliding I guess. Let me know what you think . Love u guys xoxo

The thing about love is that you couldn't see it coming , you can't stop the way it makes you feel, and you just can't help who makes you feel that way no matter how much you wished you could go back and change it.

And If mick knew then what he finally knew know, he wouldn't have let himself fall so easily for someone that could never be his. Not like that.

And he really should have known.

She was his teammate well before she even became his friend , and at first mick had been too shy and much too afraid to get in her way.

Because she was the star, the main driver with two world championships already beneath her belt. He still felt like a rookie compared to her, just another guy that couldn't help but want to bathe beneath her golden light .

The northern star didn't even compare to Cherrie Valentine , she was everything that he could dream of loving and more.

But he had never been the first one to make a move before , never the one to let his confidence fuel his decisions and get good results . Instead he just stood to the side engaging only with shy smiles and bashful laughs , listening to her speak to everyone around her as though they were her family .

And maybe they were because they had been there with her for the whole ride , had seen her ups and her downs. They Had watched her cry in misery when the car just wouldn't fucking take her there and then got to watch her cry with joy when it finally did, as it rocketed her to the top. Bringing home the points and the trophies, making world records and keeping new titles. Mick had only ever watched from afar , content with his seat. Just happy that he could be her teammate. Knowing that so many other people would dream to be in his spot.

He Got to be up close and personal with a woman that he had only dared to glimpse at. Got to see who she was beneath the helmet and beneath the lights and the spray of the champagne . Away from the excited screams of her name , when the starlight finally burned down.

She was just another person like him, a woman who felt things like everybody else yet hardly ever let anyone see her down. Never let anybody see the truth. Nobody knew her like they wished to, only a select few that he didn't know about yet.

So it came as a surprise to Mick when the first time they really spoke properly, the first time that the first wall came crumbling down between them, was at a afterparty for the woman of the hour , after yet another win.

But she didn't look happy and he caught her wiping at the corner of her eye as she escaped out to the balcony , away from the congratulations and the 'how did she do it?'. Silk dress fluttering behind her as she was finally left alone.

And mick , so full of admiration and naive hope, finally saw his chance . So he took it.

He grabbed two flutes of champagne and followed her out through the double doors, saw her sat down on the balcony floor , back against the golden gate as she looked out to the night.

Her head only lifted when she heard the shuffle of his shoes, her eyes assessing his nervous face and hopeful smile . She gave him a small smile and murmured a soft "hey mick."

And just like that mick was far too gone to think it through .

And maybe if he had, heartbreak would never have been on his horizon.

But mick had never thought of himself as a smart man. So he slid down to the floor opposite her, the heels of their shoes brushing as he passed her a champagne glass with a nervous smile

"You looked a bit...sad." He spoke quietly , warily. Not wanting to overstep a line but wanting to make sure that she was okay.

She was still his teammate after all and weren't they supposed to look out for each other?

Cherrie let out a light laugh, sipping on the bubbly before looking back out to the sparkling view below them. Admiring it with tired eyes , the wind sweeping at her hair as she hesitated for a moment before deciding that mick was someone that she could let in.

He was her teammate after all.

"I just miss my home." She told him just as quietly , fidgeting with the locket around her neck. Fingers gently stroking over the delicate gold, holding onto it like it was her lifeline.

And mick really should have known.

Instead he had tilted his head in confusion , oblivious .

"But you are home? It's Monaco. You live here don't you?" He had said. Brows furrowing as he tried to understand why she looked so down when her home was just a walk away. In one of the mot beautiful places in the world .

Cherrie shook her bread a little, smiling a little like he had said something silly. And maybe he had. He did. He just didn't know it back then.

He really wished he had.

"My mother used to always say that home isn't a place. If you take away the mirrors and take away the bed. What do you have left? Just a lot of empty rooms for your voice to echo around." She murmured thoughtfully , chin on her tucked up knees as she glanced over at him like he knew what she meant.

But mick didn't . And that was what started it all. That was the beginning of the end for him.

He laughed lightly and replied "I think that home is wherever you make it. Don't you consider Monaco your home?" Curious to know why she looked so down when she should be golden.

Cherrie just sighed , then squeezed her locket gently . Eyes briefly flashing with a subtle disappointment that he had never understood, not back then.

"No. I don't." Was all she said. Not expanding on it further , but she added after a moment of silence between them quietly "It just gets a little lonely here sometimes . My real friends and family aren't here with me and well...celebrating without your hearts residents feels a bit empty ya know?"

Mick looked at her . Blinded by her beauty , naive with his own selfish heart. He only hesitated for a moment Before shyly telling her "maybe we could hang out more." Making her look over at him in curiosity , eyebrow raising at him. A little amused .

He rushed to add "I mean. Then you wouldn't be so lonely right? We're teammates after all. We should be better friends shouldn't we?" Like that was all he wanted from her.

For a long moment she just looked at him in contemplative silence , eyes scanning his button up shirt and faded blue Jeans. His perfectly jelled hair and ocean eyes.

His nervous and bashful demeanour bringing back memories of all that she missed, a little too close and far in comparison . But the likeliness was there, or maybe she was champagne drunk, sad and missing her home.

But she laughed and accepted with a small smile "okay." She said lightly as though mick wasn't suddenly beaming , as though she didn't notice the way his pretty eyes lit up and the way he shuffled his body close to her without even realising it.

She chose to look away. And mick looked deeper and got closer to her instead.

And really he should have known right from the start but love had never been very kind to him either.

And they did get closer after that, at work and out of it too. He wasn't so afraid to come up and talk to her anymore , laughing loudly at her muttered jokes and judgmental comments about others around the track.

Sticking close by her side during press, during stupid challenges and Pr. The only time he wasn't as close to her was when they raced because despite driving a similar car to her own, she was still much too good and much too fast.

But mick wasn't always so far behind her. And his grin couldn't have been any bigger when they got a team 1-2, finally on the podium together .

His heart had never felt more full, cheeks flushed pink as they sprayed each other with champagne, his heart racing in his chest when she hugged him and told him that she was proud of him.

Grinning at him with oblivious excitement as she wrapped her arm around his shoulder, his falling to her waist as she told him how amazing he was, how talented he was and that she couldn't have asked for a better teammate if she tried.

And mick.

Mick just tell further down the Rabbit hole while Cherrie was none the wiser , smiling and letting him hold onto her like it was something clean and easy.

Because they were friends now. And she was a great friend to him.

Then they started hanging out away from the track too. Cherrie dragged him to after parties with her, to fancy clubs and new bars. She FaceTimed him while she got ready, twirling around in her pretty dress while he tried to hide the way his eyes lingered on her tanned legs , the way it stayed on her smile. Then they would arrive together and get drunk together , she would dance with him. and against him , his hands on her hips as he tried not to lose his mind completely . Tried not to dream. Imagining what his heart wanted him to believe .

He watched her the whole night while she sang along to every song , eyes glancing beside her when a certain song would come on, smile faltering as she looked around. As though she was waiting for somebody else to sing the next lyric back at her, frowning sadly when she was met with just drunk screaming , blinking quickly when she looked up to see just mick.

He held her close and never looked away, while Cherrie just stayed inside her head. Going along with it. So unaware that he was falling in love.

And he really should have known when she finally let him come by her apartment that so little got to see.

She answered the door dressed in an oversized hockey jersey, a number and canucks logo written acrosss it .

He didn't think to even wonder who's it could have been because she always wore them, whenever she wasn't wearing their team logo , she was wearing a jersey .

He just thought that she looked cute , admiring the way she smiled at him as she let him. Putting on a film for them to watch as she made them some pasta to eat, casual conversations and lingering look from mick as the time passed by.

And he really should have known as he wandered around her home and saw the pictures on the wall, his brows furrowing in confusion as he looked at them. Seeing the same people, the same guy, stood next to her in all of them. He wondered if they were family. Remembering what she had said to him that night about missing home.

Glancing hesitantly over at her humming softly beside the stove , he asked her curiously "are these your friends? The ones that you miss?" Not knowing just how close he was to hitting the mark.

At his question, Cherrie froze for a moment , head snapping over to him as she glanced at what he was staring at So intensely .

She didn't say anything for a minute , plating up the pasta as she thought about how much she wanted to tell him.

Then she just shrugged and said quietly "yeah." Wandering over to stand beside him, their arms brushing. Mick felt goosebumps rise on his skin, Cherrie shivered for another reason as she looked at the photograph in the pretty frame in front of them.

"That's Jack..and Quinn. They're brothers. Both hockey players." She told him quietly, pointing at each of them. Her fingertip lingering on Quinn's face, and the photo of them at a party, arms around each other , Quinn grinning down at her while she laughed at something he had whispered to her.

And he really should have known.

"Quinn's my best friend actually. But I haven't seen him in a little while ..he's busy with hockey and I've been busy winning races I guess." She laughed a little bit but there was a certain sadness in her eyes.

Mick looked at the picture , blinking in slight unease as he realised that every photo , Quinn was in them all. The two of them always stood together , even in the group photos . Quinn wearing the same jersey that she was wearing now as she stood beside him.

But mick looked down and only saw cherries pretty smile, her scrunched up nose and beautiful laugh , his heart pushed away the sudden wariness that had arose .

Only seeing what he wanted to see instead.

"Yeah? Will he be coming to any races?" He asked her curiously. Not recalling ever seeing him around before.

But Cherrie had always been good at holding her cards close to her chest, whats hers was only ever hers. And she only let peope see what she wanted them too.

Maybe the flags should have turned red and waved frantically at him then. But love had never been so kind.

Cherrie , oblivious to his lingering gaze on her smiling mouth, just nodded hopefully . "Yeah..he watches them all though. But he'll make it , I think he wants to see me win the championship again. We always celebrate that one together." She told him and that should have been the biggest clue.

But mick just smiled at her like he always did "that's cool. It's sounds like you two are close. It's nice to have such good friends that support you."

She giggled "it is." She agreed lightly , eyes lingering on the photo before finally turning away.

"you'd probably like him. You remind me a little of him. You're both quiet and shy until you get to know someone ..he's the same way. It's took him months to work up the courage to speak to me! And that was when we were teenagers. He still acts the same way around me know." She found herself telling him with fondness in her voice. Honest.

And he really , really should have known.

He starting thinking a lot more about it after that, unable to shake the unease that now roamed free within him. Wondering , hoping , refusing to see what was right in front of him.

Instead he just enjoyed being by her side. Enjoyed their late night hangouts , their random calls and sleepovers . Enjoyed the way she would let him come over to keep her company, enjoyed the attention that she would give him when she was sad and lonely.

They way she let him hold her a little tighter those nights , mick falling asleep beside her to the sound of the hockey game playing on her phone , her eyes never leaving the screen. Cheering quietly when Quinn scored, smiling whenever his face appeared , softening completely .

And he was right beside her.

So why did he feel like he was competing with someone that wasn't even there? He frowned a little, shoving away the niggle in his stomach, overtaken by the love in his heart as he watched Cherrie giggle down at her phone.

Sat on the couch beside him, her knees pressed into his legs, his hand on her thigh as he gently rubbed the soft skin there. Trying to breathe normally , because she was so fucking beautiful that sometimes it hurt just to be there. In her shadow. In his.

"Quinn told the farmer trying to sell him milk and cheese at his door that he was vegetarian. He's such an idiot ." She told him in Amusement, giggling loudly as she text him back. Full focus on her phone while his focus was on her .

It always was.

He grinned a little "he meant vegan."

She nodded her head with a grin just as her phone rang , Quinn FaceTiming her. "Yeah." Was all she laughed out before accepting the call.

Getting up from the couch, she grinned down at her phone screen . Shaking her head at Quinn "you fucking idiot! What is wrong with you?!" She teased him while laughing loudly .

He heard Quinn groan in misery "I panicked! Then I felt so bad that I accepted the milk and cheese anyway. Told him that I'd give it to a friend. It was so fucking expensive too! Like triple the price at the store." He rambled to her, laughing too. Just because she was. "He's going to delivery fresh milk and cheese every Friday to my door now. I have a subscription."

Cherrie had tears in her eyes, snorting through her giggles as she collapsed back down on the couch beside him.

Mick glancing at her phone, brows furrowing a little as he got his first glimpse of the hockey player that took up so much of her time and so much of her laughter.

He didn't look like anything special at first glance . Messy hair and scruff, oversized sweatshirt that had cherries name written across the front of it. A Picture of her from her first every championship . Handmade .

Mick looked away . Because she was allowed to have friends, mick was her friend too. It was fine.

"You idiot." She said affectionately "I miss your stupid ass." She said, leaning her head down to rest on Micks shoulder.

He glanced down at her with a small smile, cheeks going rosy when she looked up at him with amusement in her eyes. Shaking her head at Quinn's behaviour.

He heard Quinn's laugh turned into a softer  exhale "yeah I miss you too. What are you up to?"He asked her.

She hesitated for a moment before glancing at mick again, biting at her lip as the second went too long. Then she finally told quinn "I'm hanging out with mick." And mick was surprised. Because usually she took her calls elsewhere. And he hasn't met him formally yet.

He didn't know whether it was a good thing or not , but he smiled anyway when she turned her phone screen for them to see each other .

"Hey." Mick said a little bashfully, giving a little wave as he watched the hockey player pause in shock for a moment , bored furrowing as he looked back at him. Obviously not expecting him to be right there beside her. Mick told himself not to feel smug.

Then he slowly nodded his head back at him, smile dimming a little. "Hey man." He greeted him back politely. A good guy .

"how's it been being menaces teammate? She done your head in yet?" He joked. Friendly enough.

But mick saw the way Quinn started fiddling with the locket around his neck, making him shift uneasily on the couch beside cherrie as he realised why it looked so familiar.

He briefly glanced down and saw a matching one resting on cherries chest, he inhaled deeply and pushed the sudden thoughts away.

Because he was stupid and he was in love and she was leaning against him and Quinn was halfway across the world.

"No. No. It's been nice. She's a good teammate and a good friend." And he meant it. She was a good friend even if he wanted to be more.

Quinn just smiled a little. And that was the end of their interaction as he changed the subject and started talking to Cherrie about a film he had recently seen that reminded him of her.

and mick really should have known. But he was too busy pretending that the smile on her face was just for him instead.

They got a little closer after that. Mick spending more time at her place as Quinn's schedule became busy with away games, leaving not as much time for them to call each other. Secretly , he was glad because that meant he got her all to himself.

He tried to cheer her up. She was more pouty and quite as they traveled to their next race together , sticking to his side as she picked up a bottle of booze and brought it up to their hotel room that they were sharing.

There was two double beds but after a bottle of vodka , they ended up together in just the one.

And mick really should have known what was happening when he finally worked up the courage to kiss her , should have noticed the way that she paused before she kissed him back , the way that she didn't linger on his lips like he did on hers.

The kiss was rushed , his nerves and excitement making him blind to anything but her beauty and her body as he took off their clothes.

Kissing every inch of skin that his lips could reach , mesmerising every sweet sound she made. Just giddy that it was finally happening , that she was kissing him back and letting him in. Or so he thought.

But his heart and his dick took away any common sense, all the flags lowering and all the concerns and unease stripped away as he buried his face in her neck, his hard cock nudging between her thighs as she wrapped her legs around his waist. Both of them sweaty and drunk, Cherrie gripping onto his shoulder blames, nails digging into his skin as he swallowed thickly, gazing down at her bare, Beautiful body in awe. Feeling every curve , every strength and weakness.

But she was his weakness. That was the problem.

And really he should have known , should have noticed the way she couldn't look him in the eye when he slid into her, despite the way she threw her head back in pleasure , choking on a moan as he fucked into her.

Gripping her hips as he bent her knees up to her chest, eyes glued to way her lips were parted , swollen and red from his kiss.

"Fuck.." he grunted as he pounded into her, moaning at the way she felt around him. So wet and so tight , her back arching to meet each thrust as she clenched her cunt around him. Making him lose his breathe. His hands planting on either side of her head, panting as he fucked her hard. The hotel room bed slamming against the wall and he prayed that the hotel room beside theirs was empty this night.

"That's it..fuck!" She whined, head thrown back as she hiccuped, eyes still squeeze shut.

Mick's eyes were glued on her bouncing tits, missing the way her mouth mimed a silent name that wasn't his. But he was lost in her, lost in her hot cunt as he fucked her like she was just another body. Even though his heart was racing and his wanted to beg for her to open her eyes and look at him, to tell her how much he loved her, to tell her how amazing he thought she was. How she was all he wanted. How he wanted to wake up to her in the morning, wanted to be her teammate both on and off the track. How he wanted to fuck her for the rest of his life.

But he didn't say any of what he wanted. And maybe that was for the best. Maybe a little part of him knew that she didn't feel the same way, couldn't forget the smile she had when her phone rang after each race.

The way that she rushed off to talk to someone that wasn't him, only returning an hour later to hang out after she was done. When it was too late in another state for them to talk much longer.

But mick took all that he could. Sunk his head down and kissed her while he had the chance, his tongue dipping into her Mouth As he squeezed her breast, twisting and pinching at her tits until she was squirming beneath him, screaming and crying for him to fuck her harder.

So he did.

And he tried to ignore the way she still hadn't opened her eyes to look at him, the way her brows were furrowed as he reached his thumb down to circle her clit. The way she didn't kiss him back, but letting her kiss her instead.

Ignoring the way that she let her hands fall away from his back, the way she clutched at her locket that she refused to take off even as mick fucked her like she didn't have his whole heart.

Gritting his teeth and squeezing his own eyes shut too as his hips stuttered , bathing himself in the way she tensed up and clenched around him as they came . Milking his cock as he buried his face in her neck, whimpering her name as he lazily fucked them through thier orgasms.

Tried to ignore the way she didn't say his name at all. Not once. And she didn't let him hold her either. Only Giving him a small smile after , unable to meet his eyes when she finally got up much later to clean herself up.

He tried to ignore the way she stayed in the bathroom for so long. Ignored the shower running for an hour as she washed him away. Ignored the way she made up some excuse about not being tired enough to join him in bed to sleep.

He heard her phone ring and he heard her pick it up. He heard her sniffle and he turned to bury his face in the pillow, blinking back his own tears too. Because he knew then , that she didn't return his feelings at all. Knew that she didn't feel the same, that she never did. And really. It wasn't her fault because she had never promised him anything other than being her friend.

He was the one who had found her out and glued himself to her side. He was the one that had ignored the signs .

He really should have known, right from the start what he was getting himself into.

But love was never so kind as to let him love a woman that could love him so purely too.

That was never in the cards for him.

But still he hoped because love was naive , and his hope was a healing wound being picked at again and again.

They weren't as close anymore after that night. They were still friends of course and she still talked to him, still gave him a smile whenever they were on the podium together. But she didn't come out with him anymore. They didn't go to clubs together, didn't play video games until the sun came up.

Didn't call just to say hello.

And mick finally knew why. He knew that he was never going to be that guy.

He had seen the guilt on her face that night when she snuck out of their hotel room before the morning could even arrive, the way it never happened again.

He just wished he knew then what he knew now.

Maybe it would have hurt a little less to see her light up after she finally won yet another championship, she didn't even glance his way as she hauled herself out of her winning car.

The crowd screaming and crying her name , but she was blind to it all because she only had her eyes one person.

Her face splitting in two, smile bigger than the whole world as she saw Quinn Hughes standing in middle of her team, looking at her with a face full of pride, smiling at her like she was everything that he had ever wanted.

Looking at her like she was worth more than this, as though she was his god. His arms already open for her as she ran to him without a second thought , throwing her arms round his neck as he pulled her up over the barrier and into his arms.

The both of them crying in happiness and joy , his hands cupping her face as he wiped away her tears and told her tearfully "I knew you could do it! I knew it! You unbelievable woman!"

And mick had to agree.

He didn't take off his helmet , swallowing down the painful lump in his throat as he slowly lingered by his car parked beside her own.

Watching his heart break break into tiny pieces right in front of him and having no one to blame but himself.

Because it was obvious wasn't it? And he really should have known.

Instead, he watched with tears in his eyes as Cherrie laughed more freely than he had ever heard her, eyes glossy and wide with pure happiness as she cupped Quinn's jaw in her hands, shaking her head with pure love as she told him with a shaky voice

"i love you so fucking much." Meaning with her entire being. Heart, body and soul.

Because it took breaking micks heart for her to realise what she had right there in front of her all along.

Quinn was her best friend. It was written in the stars.

Since they were teenagers, him nervous and shy as he fumbled over his words just to be her friend. Her name always on his lips and his heart intwined with her own.

And the distance between them had only strengthened their bond, making them realise that they didn't want to be apart, didn't want anybody else. They were each other's person, each other's 'the one'.

The kind of love that you only ever seen in movies and In passing stories of a love not lost. So rare. And so beautiful.

And mick couldn't even feel angry. Because he should have seen this coming. Should have known all along.

But that didn't make it hurt any less. Wishing that it was him holding her with pride, watching Quinn beam down at her. Kissing her again as he Admitted to her finally "it's always been you. I have loved you for so long. I love you. So fucking much you little shit." Laughing with eachother joyfully , wrapped up in each other's embrace. Not caring about anyone else around them, not caring about the cameras or the screamed of the fans. The definition of best friends. Lovers.

All they cared about was each other.

And when later on, Cherrie finally passed by him. Letting him hug her gently , while whispering his quiet congratulations, voice trembling as he tried not to let his broken heart be shown.

There was guilt on her pretty face but the pure happiness in her eyes couldn't be taken away, and mick just wished that it could've been him.

"I'm sorry." She whispered , hugging him again. Feeling guilty that she didn't feel the same way. Wishing that it could have been easier for him.

But love hurt. And mick just laughed brokenly and shrugged a little , sniffling as he wiped at his eyes. Grinning falsely , lips trembling with hurt .

"I should have known" was all he could murmur . Because it was true. The clues had always been there, she had never even tried to hide it. Mick had just ignored it in favour of his own desires. Of his own heart.

"Maybe in another life..could I have been him?" He dared to ask her, quietly. Pulling away. Just wanting to go home and cry himself to sleep until he stopped seeing the smile on her face whenever she saw her best friend.

And cherrie , Cherrie swallowed thickly and glanced away . Then caught Quinn's eyes, seeing him waiting for her, holding her trophy with a 'that's my girl' smile on his face. Waiting to take her home.

Their home.

Because he was her home and she was his and it didn't matter where they were in the world. When they had each other. And they had their love . And they had their friendship. And it felt right and it felt golden.

And she knew that he was the one.

"I think he's my every life Mick. He loves me. Really loves me." She said it like she couldn't believe it herself .

Fidgeting with her locket that held a picture inside of the day they met , younger and Quinn so nervous , puppy love before they even knew what it was. Forced to take a picture by their parents, Cherrie smiling at the camera while Quinn was just smiling at her.

And mick could only watch as she finally walked away from him , one last squeeze to his arm and a whispered goodbye.

And all he could think brokenly was that He really should have known.

[tidalskii]

It was announced yesterday that LittleBigPlanet 3’s game servers would be closing indefinitely, putting an end to the remaining online support the original LBP trilogy still had. I’ve managed to collect my thoughts and pay my tributes to the series before I part ways with it.

This game series means the world to me, and I am extremely proud and honored to have been apart of it’s community. I started playing the games in 2010 with the demo for LittleBigPlanet on PS3 and… I wasn’t impressed. I got stuck before I even played the game! I had a second controller turned on somewhere so 6 y/o me was presented with the “Select Profile” screen.

Having no clue why none of the buttons on my controller were working, I think I just turned it off and didn’t play it for months. Idk what got me to play it again, but I’m glad I did because I fell in LOVE with the game. Everything about how it controlled just… clicked with me. I thought it was genius, the sheer amount of expressiveness you could display; tilting the controller to move your head or your hips, using the D-Pad to change your facial expression, moving each individual arm with both sticks and the limb buttons on the back, it was all so intuitive and fun to do. Although, once me and my cousin learned how to slap each other in-game, it was over for my parents’ ears lol, we’d be screaming and yelling at each other. Sure enough that Christmas, I got the full game, specifically the special kind with some of the DLC pre-installed. That’s where the REAL fun began. Nearly every night after school I’d bring a couple of friends over and we’d try to play through as many levels as we could in one-sitting. The Metal Gear Solid DLC levels I often died immediately in and I would wait for an older kid I knew to get to a checkpoint and revive me. Regardless of how bad I was at the game, it was so much fun, especially now that we were able to experience the create mode. My mom actually started playing it, too. I don’t have any pictures of it sadly but she made a really expansive house with separate rooms and secret passages everywhere, it was really cool. I’d say I spent a good year or so playing the first game, then Christmas 2011 arrived. That’s when I got LittleBigPlanet 2.

LBP2 is my favorite video game of all time, it does what every good sequel should do: expand on what made the first game so amazing without straying too far away from its core appeal. For starters, if you already owned LBP the game will ask you right off the bat if you wish to import all of your collected items, costumes, and levels into LBP2. This absolutely BLEW MY MIND and in a weird way it kind of made playing the first game obsolete. You mean to tell me EVERYTHING I’ve ever made is already here, I can just… continue working on it?! I can still rock the same costumes I had, I can play music from the FIRST game in the SECOND game?!?! That alone made LBP2 so much of a gem in my eyes, it was LITERALLY the first game and MORE. But the fun didn’t end there! It was around this time I got a PSN account, so I was able to experience everyone else’s creations online and… wow. A whole new world just opened up, a whole community to engage and interact with. I met so many amazing people, some of whom are my closest friends to this day, over a decade later. It was through a group of some older kids that I often tagged along with that started getting into anime and comics more. 2011-2014 was a magical time to be on LBP, those years really felt like “The Golden Years” of the online community. Oh yeah and LBP Karting and the portable games existed too, I guess. I played LBPK, I thought it was fun… I still own it, but I’ve barely touched it after all these years. From what I’ve heard PSP and Vita seemed like a lot of fun, I’ve just never played them. Around early-mid 2014, it was announced that there would be a third LBP game for both the PS3 and the newly-released PS4. New characters, 16-LAYERS in create-mode (!!!), and a weird purple lightbulb as the new main-antagonist of the story mode… “Newton”. I remember being so excited for it to release. We were FINALLY getting a THIRD LittleBigPlanet, for a new console, too! We sure did, alright.

To this day, I’m still not sure how to feel about LittleBigPlanet 3, and it feels like the greater community more or less can’t ether. This game… SHOULD be better than the 2nd game, and you know what? Catch me on a good day and I might say that I prefer LBP3 to LBP2. Everything’s there, a new story, cross-compatibility with LBP and LBP2, a fleshed-out create mode, all of it’s there and what we have in the game is phenomenal, however there’s one big, glaring issue that distracts it from being superior to its predecessors… this game is BROKEN. I know people like to throw out that term a lot with somewhat buggy games but oh my god, LBP3 is DANGEROUSLY glitchy and exploitative. By this point, Media Molecule had moved on from the LBP series to continue developing new games, leaving Sumo Digital to oversee LBP3’s development. I feel so bad for Sumo Digital because it’s painfully obvious Sony rushed their time to complete the game for a holiday 2014 release date… and the quality of the final game reflects the time-crunch they must’ve gone through. Joining friends can take you up to a half-hour if you’re unlucky, it’s a gamble if the game will even function properly. Often you’ll be sent back to your pod after the game rapid-fires it’s loading screen (btw serious warning for anyone with epilepsy: DON’T play LittleBigPlanet 3, it does stuff like this all the time), but when the screen fades in, Sackboy doesn’t respawn, soft-locking the game. Fun! I’m not sure if anyone else suffered from this one specific, GAME-BREAKING bug as I’ve never seen anyone else talk about it, but around 2015 or so my game’s gravity just… freaked out, regardless if you were in hover-mode or not, Sackboy would float off to the left of the screen and phase through all of the walls. I tried restarting the game, cleaning off the physical disc the sink, but nothing would fix it, I literally had to reset my game progress. Very fun! Another weird thing I ran into is the inability to place down stickers with the PS Eye Camera Tool. It just stopped working entirely at one point, even in previous games like LBP2. No idea how THAT happened, very strange bug. Despite all this… I powered through, because truthfully I do think the content in LBP3 is superior to the previous games. The music is great, I found myself genuinely invested in the story and it’s characters, the DLC packs introduced in LBP3 were all very fun, and the create mode is a GODSEND compared to the first 2 games. Honestly, that’s one of the 2 reasons why I chose to stick around with LBP3, there is SO MUCH you can do with the tools it provides you. For those of you who don’t know, for the last couple years or so I’ve been building full working models of the Thomas the Tank Engine characters in LBP3, and that’s led to me gaining a humble but amazingly awesome following in the game. I love Thomas, I love LBP, I just wanted to put those two interests together and I’m very happy people seemed to have liked what I made, which is very wholesome and sweet.

I am devastated that the game’s online services are now gone for good, but it was kind of inevitable. LBP3’s lack of quality opened the door for a lot of nasty exploitation and modifications people made to their games. The servers were hacked in 2021, and that led to the termination of the PS3’s servers. It wasn’t hard to deduce that PS4’s servers were running on borrowed-time. Regardless of how unfortunate it’s closure was, this franchise was supported for 16 years. That’s not a bad run at all. I would say I’m surprised it wasn’t closed sooner, but then again… I’m not surprised. The LittleBigPlanet community is so amazing and passionate over these games. When the 2021 server attacks happened we all rallied together online to keep it alive, if just for a little bit longer. Even at its very end, a lot of us had so much more creativity to share with the world. To all those out there listening, I hope you’re able to channel that creativity outlet even further beyond in the future, whenever and wherever that may be. As for me, I’m going to attempt to learn “Dreams”, Media Molecule’s spiritual successor to the LBP games, released on PS4/PS5. From what I’ve seen and played of that game, it scratches that itch LBP left on me. It’s so good.

Rest easy, Sackboy. Thank you for some of the best experiences I could have asked for in a video game. Here’s hoping for a LBP4 one day, old friend. 🌎

[msmargaretmurry]

I’ve recently got into hockey fics and it’s completely taken over what little brain space I had left. Do you have any recs for a baby new to this wonderful new world? 💕💕

hello friend and welcome to hockey! i’m sure you sent this ask looking for a nice little list of links but unfortunately because of who i am as a person i’m about to give you way more information than you asked for. 

before we dive in: i have a terrible memory when it comes to stuff i’ve read, and i have a pathological lack of bookmarks, and there is a LOT of hockey fic, so despite a fair bit of crowdsourcing from friends this list is obviously by no means exhaustive. there is SO much good stuff out there that isn't linked here. hockey fic to me has always felt like a very choose-your-own adventure fandom, and i want to empower you to choose your own adventure. there is so much hockey fic, there is truly something for everyone, but of course it’s all also subject to personal taste, so please read on for a little smorgasbord from which hopefully you can find some stuff you’ll love.

a very brief history of hrpf

when i say there is a lot of hockey fic, i feel like it is fun context to know that people have been posting hockey fic on the internet for more than 20 years. i have not been reading it for 20 years, so even having many years of this fandom under my belt, i am still building off the hard work of the beautiful weirdos who came before me. a lot of the pre-ao3 stuff has sadly but understandably been lost to time, but if you’re interested at all in seeing a bit of how we got to where we are now, @lovethygoalie has compiled some links here, and he has an nhl fandom history tag with some more fandom history!

hockey fic, due to the nature of the sport and the inexorable march of time, has always kind of happened in waves/cycles of certain players/pairings/teams being popular in the fandom for a little while, then fading away as new players/pairings/teams become the new hot thing. every time there’s a new wave of a popular thing, new people get sucked into the fandom, which creates this very charming-to-me phenomenon where i can often guess the ballpark of when they joined hockey fandom based on who their faves are, what teams they’re into, even what teams/players they’re NOT into, lol. (but obviously there have also always been people shipping rare pairs and medium-popular pairs and rooting for less popular teams and players, too! it’s a big fandom!)

anyway, that’s something i have found super fascinating to observe over the years and also something i wanted to touch on here to explain why there’s going to be some fic recs in here featuring players who you might never see mentioned the current hrpf zeitgeist. some of the players have retired, some of the pairings have simply waned in popularity, some of the teams are just not currently “in” in hockey fandom, but i still think it’s totally worth going back to dig into older stuff in addition to having fun with the current popular narratives and pairings, etc.

but onto the recs!

(it should go without saying, but please heed the tags/warnings on anything linked here! i’m offering these links mostly without commentary, but a lot of it is going to be mature/explicit-rated, some of it will deal with sensitive themes, some if it might have stuff you just don’t care for! not knowing your personal tastes, i tried to curate a selection of various lengths, types, tropes, pairings, teams, etc.)

i saw you just read my behemoth matthew/leon fic, so let’s start with more of that. it’s a popular pairing right now! very fun characters and narratives to work with! here are a few authors whose matthew/leon stuff i definitely recommend across the board (links go to their ao3 pages; there’s no point in linking individual fics because i would just be linking all of them):

bropunzeling

daisysusan

ohtempora

and some short one-shots that i really enjoyed:

if you handed over your body by photovoltaic (mature, 2.7k)

truce by anonymous (explicit, 2.1k)

and i will not come back the same by void_fish (explicit, 4k)

partly crowdsourced from pals, here are additional fic recs for pairings/players/narratives that are varying levels of currently relevant:

Fragments by heartequals (cole caufield/nick suzuki, explicit, 20k)

wait a year by daisysusan (quinn hughes/brady tkachuk, explicit, 16.8k)

cover love’s bruise by addandsubtract (johnny gaudreau/sean monahan, explicit, 8.3k)

don't ever be a stranger by bropunzeling (jamie drysdale/trevor zegras, explicit, 24k)

For the Summer by gigantic (jack hughes/trevor zegras, explicit, 3.5k)

Lionheart by Aliquis (nico hischier/jonas siegenthaler, explicit, 53k)

All Your'n by jvrcus (mathew barzal/anthony beauvillier, teen & up, 13.8k)

let's make it cinematic by kitnita (mathew barzal/anthony beauvillier, explicit, 13.2k)

@grittyreadsfic is a mostly-hockey fic rec blog! they read much more widely than me and definitely have recs for a lot of currently popular pairings not covered here, as well as rarepairs and more niche stuff.

@postoperation compiled a great list of older-ish hockey fic recs that i HIGHLY recommend, and not just because one of mine is included in there. 😂

more older fics, in no particular order; a once again partly-crowdsourced-from-my-friends list of recs:

so collect your scars and wear them well by addandsubtract (connor mcdavid/dylan strome, mature, 26k)

A Month of Sundays by Kelfin (erik johnson/gabe landeskog, mature, 68k)

Friday Night Arrives Without a Suitcase by marycontraire (danny briere/claude giroux, not rated, 14.6k)

Something Old by uraneia (danny briere/claude giroux, explicit, 13.4k)

if courage is a live wire by redheartglow (adam henrique & taylor hall friendship, teen & up, 15.5k)

Like an Explosion by Dark_Eyed_Junco (nic dowd/derek forbort, mature, 4.3k)

Lions in Arms by xihale (alex ovechkin/sidney crosby, mature, 4.7k) 

Hockey at the End of the World by ionthesparrow (jeff carter/mike richards and tyler toffoli/tanner pearson, mature to explicit, a series of five fics totaling 383k)

@deepbutdazzlingdarkness has a washington capitals fic rec list; i haven’t read everything on there but i have liked what i’ve read! [i am very picky about caps fic because a) i’m a snob about local details and b) i can only read so much smut about dudes i might run into at the jeni’s ice cream in tysons corner. but there is some very good stuff. similarly, a rec i haven’t read but it comes from a friend whose writing i deeply admire and whose taste i trust implicitly:

mouth-deep by saintsideways (nicklas backstrom/mike green, explicit, 30k); the reccer says, “it’s a wild time and coated with an absolutely visionary layer of grime I can only aspire to.”]

@bunnymcfoo also has an extensive rec list, much of which i have not read, but definitely worth checking out if you need more!

anyway, sorry if that was too much, but hopefully it is just enough to get you started chasing your own hockey fic bliss. my ask box is open if you have any questions! ❤

[tarditzgrade]

this is probably my last fic for greenflower week. i've got no ideas for the other prompts so i'm gonna work on compiling them into a ao3 fic that'll go up tomorrow maybe probably. besides that though

Day 4 - Healing/Hurt

Lloyd finds Brad after he got in a fight and offers to help bandage his wounds.

around 1082 words :). tw/cw for mentions of blood and violence. it's not gratuitous and the injury is kept kinda vague, but it's still there.

“I still can’t believe you got into a fight.” Lloyd called from the bathroom.

“I still can’t believe the guy had the audacity to scratch me.” Brad responded from his spot on the couch. He turned over his forearm to get a better look at the scratches that ran up it. That guy must’ve had talons on him.

Brad readjusted the ice pack Lloyd had given him earlier. Oh, how the tables had turned. Usually it was Lloyd showing up at Brad’s place in the middle of the night because he got beat up.

This time, Lloyd had found Brad beat up after fighting with some guy in the city. According to Brad’s own assessment, he thought he was fine to patch himself up, but Lloyd insisted on going with him to his place to help out.

“Where’d you say the bandages were, again?”

“Middle shelf of the cabinet. The rest of the first aid stuff should be there, too.”

“Oh, I see it.”

Several clatters could be heard following that statement, supposedly the sound of many plastic items hitting the floor.

“Sorry! I dropped a few things.”

“It’s fine.” Brad moved the ice pack he held on his side again. Maybe he should get something to put in-between him and the ice. This cold was starting to feel biting and his shirt didn’t seem to be enough. “Can you grab a small towel while you’re back there?” Brad called.

“Yup.” Lloyd responded.

Brad sighed and looked back at the scratches on his arm. None of them were too major on their own and they had all stopped bleeding a bit ago. The issue was that they were numerous. It was like he had gotten mauled by a cat, but instead it was a grown-ass man.

“Okay, I don’t know if this is all needed, but better safe than sorry, right?” Lloyd came back into the room with a few medical supplies. “Here’s the towel.”

“Thanks.” Brad accepted the towel and placed it between the ice pack and his shirt. Yeah, that felt better.

Lloyd placed the stuff he brought down on the coffee table, then pulled Brad’s arm closer to him. He grimaced. “What’d you even do to get this scratched up?”

“If you think this is bad, you should see the other guy. I think I caught him across the face once or twice.”

“I don’t doubt it.” Lloyd sat down next to Brad to look at his arm better. “Since when did you get into fights?”

“I mean, I went to Darkley’s, too, so I’m no stranger to it. But this was an exception. He started it and I was just defending myself.”

“Well, as long as this doesn’t become a pattern, I guess it’s fine. The scratches are just on this arm, right?”

“I think so.” They had already cleaned the wounds earlier, with Lloyd running Brad’s arm under the water himself. Brad, again, felt that he could’ve done all this on his own, and expressed this to Lloyd, but Lloyd asserted that he wanted to help.

Lloyd made a move for the pile of medical stuff before stopping, hesitant to select something.

“Are you okay, Lloyd?”

“Yeah, uh, do you apply ointment for stuff like this or just skip straight to the bandages?”

“…you don’t know?”

Lloyd picked up one of the tubes of ointment. “Not really. When I get hurt, I just put a bandage on it until someone else who’s better at this stuff can come look at it. Sometimes I don’t even bandage it if I’m short on time.”

“That’s usually how cuts get infected.”

“Probably,” was all Lloyd had to answer. Before Brad could fire back his concerns, Lloyd had decided on an answer to his previous question. “Y’know what? Let’s just do the ointment, anyways. It can’t hurt.”

“Are you sure?”

“Kinda.” And without further elaboration, Lloyd applied ointment to the first cut.

It didn’t hurt, and Brad didn’t expect it to. It was Lloyd’s determination that surprised him more than anything.

Lloyd worked quietly and diligently, individually rubbing ointment into each cut. Brad let him sit in silence and watched as he did. Despite his apparent ineptitude with this kind of stuff, he seemed to be fairly confident with his methods.

Occasionally, he’d ask Brad if he was doing alright or if he needed another ice pack, but Brad told him he was okay.

“Okay,” Lloyd rubbed ointment into the final wound. “I think that’s the last one. The rest are too tiny to care about.”

“If something happens with those, I’ll tell you.” Brad turned his arm over to verify what Lloyd had done. “What now?”

“Bandages, probably. Do you want, like, one big wrap or a bunch of tiny ones?”

Brad laughed at the thought of his arm riddled with tiny band-aids. “The wrap is probably more practical.”

“Okay, just making sure.” Lloyd found a roll of bandages in the pile he brought out and began wrapping it around Brad’s forearm.

“So you don’t do any of the medical stuff for the team?” Brad asked.

“Nope. Only reason I’m in the infirmary is if I’m hurt.” He tapped Brad’s arm to signal he was done.

“I think you should try helping out there more. You did a great job with this one.” He leaned over to plant a kiss on Lloyd’s cheek. “Thanks for taking care of me, green bean.”

Lloyd smiled at the nickname. “Anytime.” He gathered up all the medical supplies on the table and went to put them back in the bathroom.

Brad watched him go. Damn, he was lucky. Lloyd didn’t have to do this. He had a whole city to watch over. But instead he took the time to stop and help him out with something as small as this, even if it wasn’t entirely his forte.

What did he do to deserve someone like Lloyd?

Lloyd came back after a bit, but he didn’t sit down. “Anyways, you should rest up. Don’t forget to change the bandages after a while. And watch those bruises.”

“I will.” Brad responded. If Lloyd was gonna stop and help, Brad might as well indulge. “Do you have any plans after this?”

“Well, it's late, so no, I don’t.”

“You wanna stay the night? I’m not doing anything tomorrow morning.”

Lloyd thought about it, but ultimately agreed. “Sure. As long as it’ll keep you out of fights.”

“It probably will.”